#and my old account is like 2011 i think

[sunburnacoustic]

Muse to play 'Origin Of Symmetry' in full at Reading And Leeds Festivals 

Matt Bellamy tweets the news about 2001 album

March 29, 2011

Muse are planning to play their 'Origin Of Symmetry' album in full at the Reading And Leeds Festivals this summer, according to Matt Bellamy.

The frontman had already stated that the band's headline sets would draw heavily from their 2001 album. He also said that the shows would be the last time some of those songs were played live.

Now he has tweeted that the Devon trio will be playing the 2001 album, their second, from start to finish.

He wrote from Twitter.com/bellamy_matt: "So we'll probably play 'Origin...' in its entirety (as well other songs) at Reading/Leeds as it will be 10 years since it came out."

The Reading And Leeds Festivals take place on August 26–28. Muse headline the Friday night (26) at Leeds and the Sunday night (28) at Reading.

My Chemical Romance, The Strokes and Pulp will also play headline slots.

------------

Muse to play 'Origin...' songs for the 'last time' at Reading And Leeds Festivals

Matt Bellamy and co. talk to NME about headline slots

March 22, 2011

Muse have said they are likely to play some songs from their 'Origin Of Symmetry' album for the "last time" at this year's Reading And Leeds Festivals.

The band were speaking in the new issue of NME (March 23) or available digitally. They are joining My Chemical Romance in headlining the August events, while The Strokes and Pulp will play co-headline slots.

Frontman Matt Bellamy said that the band want to mark the 10-year anniversary of 'Origin Of Symmetry''s release in some way at the shows.

"It's probably the last time some of these songs will ever be played live again," he said of the 2001 album. He explained that the shows would see the band "drawing a line under one phase of our career".

He added: "It was on the second album ['Origin...'] that things really started happening for the band, and when we focused on the live side of things much more. So it'll be like coming full circle: we've gone off on one a little bit, and now it feels like the right time to pull it back and remind ourselves of what we were doing 10 years ago."

The Reading And Leeds Festivals take place on August 26–28. Muse headline the Friday night (26) at Leeds and the Sunday night (28) at Reading.

[straycalamities]

i think i’m gonna just post my art on here bc i don’t plan on reblogging a ton anyways

I ALSO DUNNO. WHAT ALL DO I POST? the last time i posted art on tumblr was way back in 2015!!!! i think

do i play catch-up? or do i just post some most recents???? the thing abt catch-up is. is i’ve had two laptops since then and i don’t have everything on my new one and i’m foolish and don’t have it on an external either

so i :) would have to boot up my shitty laptop that takes nine years to wake up

okay u know what i’m not even gonna overthink it. i’ll just post the decent stuff that’s on my current laptop and if i feel like dealing w the Brick then i will deal w the Brick later

[ghosty1111]

its weird seeing people get nostalgic over 2011 - 2015 in the same way my age range would for 2004 - 2010. but also. tbh. im starting to feel nostalgic for that era too. even tho i was a preteen during it. ig i wouldve liked to have been a teenager during that time.

[dreameralive]

Here's my probably incorrect assumptions about what social media sites the undersiders would use if it was 2023 instead of 2011 or something

Taylor: Tumblr. Will post really sad, in depth posts talking about her experience with bullying and her family and how alone she feels sometimes and then reblog a bunch of bug photos (like, at least 20 in a row) and then go dormant for like 2 months and then repeat the cycle when she finally regains the energy to post

Alec: reddit, twitter. Reddit but only so he and Aisha can post like really outlandish obvious troll posts in aita and legaladvice, tumblr so he can stare at princecore aesthetic moodboards and nod approvingly (he will only like it but never reblog, his blog is like a barren wasteland)

Aisha: tumblr, twitter. All fucking over the scene kid aesthetic. Reblogs and retweets Kandi making tutorials and sparkledog ocs and 2008 geocities blinkies or something. Everyone always sends her asks and makes vague posts about forgetting they have her as a mutual

Brian: reddit, twitter. Retweets exercise advice and goes on a fuckton of exercise subreddits but also frequents parenting subs and asks questions on how to properly deal with whatever Aisha has done this week and everyone who comments thinks he is actually a dad and not just the world's most emotionally repressed 17 going on 45 yr old boy. Gets into arguments with obvious trolls all the time on both sites and gets really needlessly upset and personal over it. The person who argues with him most on Twitter is actually Aisha on an alt account (she knows it's him and is doing this for the bit, he does not know it's her)

Rachel: can't read or write v well :( but if she could it'd be tumblr maybe? Or twitter? Unsure. All I know is that her account would be filled with really blurry photos of her dogs with no captions or tags or anything with the occasional all caps really angry rant post about people petting her dogs without permission. The people that follow her are mostly there to study her like they're a scientist and she's an interesting discovery they've found under their microscope. They also all assume she's like 60 and not like 15

Lisa: twitter, reddit. Have few thoughts on her but if she were to get into arguments she would use "sweetie" "honey" and ":)" condescendingly to whoever she's arguing with. This isn't Lisa hate btw i just think she truly is That Person

[phantomrose96]

how did you originally find and get on tumblr? (friendly tone) (sent by ask cultujre post)

So technically my original tumblr was from, I think, late 2012. My high school friend was like "you totally need to get on tumblr" and I was like "okay."

However that's not this blog. THIS blog is because, around March 2013 I got deep into a rewatch of Danny Phantom (which is something I would do every few years and fill my head with Danny Phantom brainrot for months). And I was like "hmm I know this series is 10 years old, but I wonder if anyone on tumblr is talking about it?"

And what do you know they were!

So I lurked for a while. But then one day I had a thought I wanted to contribute. Which I did not want to do with my blog my high school classmates followed because like "hey Chrissy, what are you, a high schooler, doing talking about horror-angst fanfic concepts for a 2004 Y-7 rated Nickelodeon cult classic cartoon that only ran for 3 years?" (The answer is: exactly the same as I'm doing as a 27-year-old still talking about horror-angst fanfic concepts for a 2004 Y-7 rated Nickelodeon cult classic cartoon which somehow does still have an active fandom almost 20 years later.)

I had, previously, in 2011 written some Danny Phantom fanfiction under this username on fanfiction.net. So I went ahead and made a brand new tumblr account with the same name in order to Danny-Phantom-post. And I've just been here ever since!

[taff-ebrum]

Taff Ebrum - The (almost) 20 year old Kirby OC

You did, in fact, read the title correctly! While Taff's real age may not be twenty, it's been almost twenty years since she was created. She was the first OC I ever created for ANYTHING. Her existence sparked my journey as a storyteller.

Let me start from the beginning.

Taff's creation:

It's December 2006 (I think). A younger me is sitting on the carpeted floor of my living room, it's in the middle of the afternoon, and Mom and I just got back from shopping at Walmart. I had turned on one of the episodes of Kirby: Right Back at Ya! that the DVR had recorded.

The episode playing was Masher 2.0. (which was my introduction to Knuckle Joe) I didn't fully understand what was going on in the episode, so I paid attention to the characters I had attachment to. Tiff and Kirby.

I must have tilted my head a bit, because I heard a light jingle on top of my head. I had deer antlers on, which my Mom had picked up for me at the store. I looked back at the screen.

It was this exact frame that the idea popped into my head. The jingle of the bells stuck with me. Younger me thought back to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, which had stuck with me. I pictured a small little deer at Tiff's side, maybe helping her bring the tray in.

That's when the idea of Taff was born. A small little pet deer. This was, of course, absolutely not a projection of what pet I may have wanted at the time...

...Okay, well, maybe I did want a pet deer, but that's beside the point.

Younger me lost track of the rest of the episode after that, as I got lost into my own world. I pictured different scenarios where the deer could be interacting with Tiff and the other characters. I played some more of the episodes with this thought in mind.

Then, shortly after, I changed the idea around in my head. What if, instead of a deer character, Tiff had an older sister figure? I adored Meta Knight as a child, so I pictured this older sister fighting the monsters that appeared in Cappytown. That's the idea that stuck.

Early life & concepts

To those who may be on the older side, like me, you may remember an OC named "Petunia Ebrum". That was Taff's original name. At first, she didn't have much of a personality outside of "fight bad guy, love little siblings". But that didn't stop me from asking any fanfic author in the early 2000s to include her in their fics. :'D

No one ever did, if you're wondering!

So I decided to do it myself! I made my own fanfiction.net account and began publishing stories. Most of them stayed in my drafts, but some were lucky enough to make it out into the world. Unfortunately, I don't believe any of these stories still exist, as I deleted my fanfiction.net account after my mother discovered I had one. (I was not supposed to be online, you see.)

Unfortunately, I don't recall much of Petunia's early personality. I think I copied what other people were doing for their OCs personalities and placed that into her. Her personality kind of varied, heavily depended on what kind of story I was writing her for. She wouldn't truly become her own individual until 2011-2012, where I realized vaguely copying other fanfic creators wouldn't cut it.

Oh, and the forms floating beside them... well, I may have taken a bit of inspiration from Sonic the Hedgehog's super forms. I'm willing to elaborate on that further in the future! There are some fun plot elements to it ;D

Enough of the past! Let's talk about the current version of Taff!

Backstory & Lore

Taff was a welcome surprise to Sir Ebrum and Lady Like. Neither of them had moved into Cappytown yet around this time. Thus, the beginning years of Taff's life were relatively normal. She was incredibly outgoing from birth, waving hello to every person she made eye contact with. Since the small ocean village they lived in didn't have a school, Lady Like homeschooled her.

Every day after school was over, Taff would run outside to play games with her friends. They would draw shapes in the sand, play tic-tac-toe, build things out of sand, and splash each other with salt water. Sir Ebrum and Lady Like would watch over the children as they played from their porch.

Taff was the kind of child to make sure everyone could be included in their games. She didn't stand for any kind of bullying and spoke up whenever someone said something out of line. The other children followed her without question and she never took advantage of that.

When Sir Ebrum got his job with King Dedede, Taff was devastated to leave her home and friends behind. No amount of begging on Taff's end could convince her parents to stay in their village. They left. Taff's never heard from any of her childhood friends ever again.

Taff hated King Dedede from her very first interaction with him. While Lady Like and Sir Ebrum dressed to impress and acted the part, Taff refused to respect him. She would not bow to him, she would not call him King Dedede, and, she called him the worst insult she could think of at the time... "smelly".

Being the immature baby King Dedede is, he decided to "show that tiny spoiled brat who's boss". That's when Taff saw her very first monster.

She wanted to leave. She wanted to go home. She wailed and begged Sir Ebrum and Lady Like to move back. But they wouldn't. So long as they were in the castle, they were usually safe. They were safe, but the townspeople of Cappytown were not. Taff would watch in horror as monsters rampaged freely around Cappytown.

Sometimes, they would destroy property. Eat animals. Hurt the villagers. And no one did anything about it. Taff tried yelling at the King, she tried to encourage the townspeople of Cappytown to rebel against King Dedede, she begged her Dad to put a stop to it.

Nothing worked. The King acted on his own and no amount of pleading and sobbing would solve the problem.

They needed a hero.

Taff began to search around the castle for something she could use to fight back. To protect the people she cared about. No one else would do it, so it had to be her. Seeing the helpless state of everybody around her only inspired her to rise to an impossible task. To become Cappytown's savior.

After locating a sword in the Castle's basement, she began to practice with it in secret. Since both of her parents were occupied with meeting the King's every demand, they couldn't keep as close an eye on Taff as they'd like to, which left her with an abundance of free-time on her hands.

She got good. She was far from perfect, but she was good. She'd study at every opportunity, practice into the night, and never let her sword out of her sight. Taff thought out her plan as much as possible. She would practice on some smaller monsters, to learn what techniques worked and what didn't.

Taff was far from a master swordsman. But after a month of doing nothing but training, she decided to take on her first monster.

(...my drawing tablet stopped working after this doodle...)

She didn't come out of the fight unscathed. She got really hurt. Nevertheless, she had completed the task she set out to do. Taff had come out victorious. She had defeated the monster and protected Cappytown.

When Sir Ebrum and Lady Like discovered what Taff was doing, they were fully against it. But Taff wouldn't take their no for an answer. Regardless if they supported her decision or not, she would continue to go out every night to fight the monsters off.

She wasn't perfect. She didn't win every single one of her battles, but with each battle, with each injury, she improved. The King was infuriated. Taff's actions could inspire a rebellion in the cappies and that was not acceptable. But it wasn't like he could get a monster to "clobber" her, she'd become a martyr if he succeeded.

King Dedede presented Taff with a choice. Either she become captain of his royal guard or he'd fire her dad and make sure that her and her families lives are hell, for as long as they live. Mortified, Taff accepted the deal. From then on, Taff's free-time was spent serving and protecting King Dedede.

She was also tasked with protecting Cappytown from any outside threats. Taff would be expected to not only patrol the castle, but patrol the outskirts of Cappytown in search of anything suspicious. Years of this torture went by. Taff bided her time; spending her hours of mind-numbing patrol coming up with the perfect plan - one that could take the King down for good.

When Taff was a teenager, she stumbled upon a light purple star-shaped ship; this was how she met Meta Knight, Sword Knight, and Blade Knight. She did not trust them, particularly after Meta Knight voiced his intentions on serving King Dedede. Meta Knight, Sword, and Blade were new factors she had to account for moving forward. It made doing anything against King Dedede more difficult.

She despised them. Later on, she would come to realize that their goals were aligned. But I'll save the details on how that came to be for now. ;D

King Dedede didn't fully trust Meta Knight at first, hence why he kept Taff as the head of the guard. Taff was grateful for this as well at first; she believed Meta Knight to be unpredictable and wasn't sure what he'd do with King Dedede.

Not too long after Meta Knight appeared, so did Escargoon, the Waddle Dees, and Waddle Doo. While that meant these new people would take on the responsibilities she previously carried, which allowed her more free-time, this also meant more people would be keeping a close watch on the King.

Doing anything she had planned was now impossible with all the Waddle Dees. Taff had run out of time.

Then Lady Like announced to Taff that she was pregnant again.

Taff was horrified. After all, Cappytown was not a safe environment to raise children in. She was terrified her younger sibling would grow up and force themselves into similar roles that she had. She desperately wanted them to grow up with a normal childhood, to feel safe, to be able to play outside without looking over their shoulder.

She attempted once more to sway her parents into moving elsewhere. Both of them had grown comfortable with their luxurious lifestyles, and believed the King would not bring harm to their children. Taff came to the realization that there was nothing she could do to stop this and broke.

She could do nothing... except take out the poison at its source. Taff would be sacrificing her own life to protect her sibling. She would take out the King and go on the run. But before she could put her plan into action, King Dedede brought Taff into his throne room and told her that Meta Knight would be replacing her as the captain - but she could still act as a guard.

Taff's plan relied on her authority as a captain, so this ultimately foiled it, and ripped away her last shred of hope. This would be around the time Taff realizes her goals align with Meta Knight's.

Years go by: Tiff is born, Fololo and Falala are adopted into the family, then Tuff is born. Monster attacks become warnings instead of disciplinary measures against Cappytown. They rarely damage property or cause injury. They merely serve to scare the villagers of Cappytown into compliance.

Taff, while working with Meta Knight, does her best to make sure Tiff and Tuff are kept out of harms way. While she's expected to keep a low-profile and obey the King's commands as to not upset him, she WILL attack a monster if that monster is directly placing her siblings in danger.

Younger Tiff and Tuff got along fine with Taff. As the two grew older, Tiff realized how messed up their situation was, and came to resent Taff for obediently going along with the King.

Which would roughly bring us to the beginning of Kirby: Right Back at Ya!

Personality:

Around strangers, Taff can come across as distant and stand-offish. She's purposefully a bit rude to people she meets, although her behavior is subject to change depending on how the stranger treats her. If she deems them to be a threat, she will close herself off entirely. But if the stranger is in need of her help, she'll be willing to show a more gentle side to them.

She does not trust easily and has high walls that surround her heart. Because of this, she is almost impossible to befriend. Even when someone has proven themselves trustworthy, Taff values consistency and will judge the individual for repeated actions.

Taff is a very good judge of character and can often tell when someone carries bad intentions.

Around people she deeply cares about, Taff is a lot more laid-back. Her old outgoing nature truly shines through when she's speaking to them. She enjoys joking around with Sword, Blade, and other friends she has in the castle. She's often the one to carry conversations. Taff goes out of her way to stay on top of her family and friends lives.

She is intensely protective of Tiff and Tuff, so much so to the point where she gets angry at Lady Like and Sir Ebrum for not keeping a better eye on them. She adamantly refuses to let either of them help out in bigger fights and becomes infuriated if others attempt to involve them.

If either of her siblings need her for anything, Taff will be there for them in an instant. Taff is decent at giving advice, but difficult at explaining it in a way that consistently makes sense to Tiff and Tuff. She also enjoys assisting them with their homework; this often just leads to her doing it for them, which she's aware of but doesn't mind.

Taff has lost a lot of her sense of self due to her childhood. She is incapable of picturing a world of peace anymore. Without her title as a protector of Cappytown, she is unsure of who she is. Taff's made peace with the idea of dying for Cappytown and fully believes that she will likely die in battle someday.

Conclusion

There is so, so much I excluded from this post. Almost two decades of brainstorming will do that to a character. I'm willing to reveal more lore for Taff (example: how she changes some of the episodes of Kirby: Right Back at Ya) the further she gets in the tournament.

I'm really excited to have this opportunity to share Taff with the world!!! I don't talk much about my OCs with anyone, so I'm super happy I discovered this tournament. Thank you to the hosts for the opportunity and good luck to all!

If you, the reader, have any questions about Taff, please feel free to send asks to this blog. Who knows, Taff might even answer some questions... ;D If I can get my drawing tablet working...

Thanks again to @kirbyoctournament !

[professoruber]

Flamebird Analysis: The odd treatment of Bette Kane and her history/experience

Batwoman (2011-2016) #1

Okay so first of all, Kate; rude much?

Second of all... was Flamebird's costume really that impractical? Especaially when compared to Kate's costume.

While admittedly Flamebird's original costume was not exactly the height of practicality...

(Although she still seemed quite capable of holding her own in it)

Beast Boy (2000) #2

However she later does in fact get a more practical outfit which she also kickass ass in.

Beast Boy (2000) #4

And we do know that its Flamebird's second (more practical-looking costume) which Kate burns, as Bette ends up suiting up in her aforementioned spare after Kate fires her...

Batwoman (2011-2016) #3

While I am admittedly not an expert on combat outfits; Flamebird's second costume to me seems like it walks a good line between aesthetic and practicality. It has plenty of flair and style to it, but also appears quite flexible and overall not really too drastically different from Kate's Batwoman costume in this regard (rather hypocritical of Kate to say "you need a uniform" while she wears a long wig for no apparent reason apart from style).

If anything...

The "uniform" which Kate gives Bette kinda strikes me as being less practical for the situation compared to the Flamebird costume which she burned. Like Bette's mask seems to be just a piece of fabric tied around her face, which certainly feels like it should be looser and not be as sleek and flexible as the Flamebird costume.

Building off this, from what I've seen and looked over so far, the treatment of Bette kinda feels like it has a weird... juxtaposition at times between what's getting told and what's being shown, I guess.

Like on one hand...

It's shown by both Bette's comments here and the existence of her old Flamebird costumes that she has been experience vigilante for sometime. Longer than Kate I think, if I'm understanding the timeline all correctly.

There seems to be this odd case of both having Kate and the narrative treat Bette as an inexperienced rookie... while also having Bette and the narrative establish Bette as having been a Teen Titan, who has fought Deathstroke and presumably has years of experience.

Even Kate's codename for Bette indicates a rookie status...

However despite the references to Bette's past career and capabilities, and Bette's protests of being more capable than Kate gives her credit for, and Kate also immediately feeling quite shitty at how harsh she was when firing Bette...

The narrative still, from what I understand, kinda vindicates Kate entirely by having Bette get brutalised to the point of falling into a coma immediately after she defies Kate by heading out as Flamebird after getting fired... so I guess Kate was right? I don't know.

Like I said, I just find all of this quite of a weird portrayal. I've been curious about Bette lately on account of her being the original Batgirl (or rather, Bat-Girl), which is a very iconic mantle to the general "Bat-Mythos" even if Bette herself is far less remembered.

I guess one thing I find especially strange is how this is from the first issues of Batwoman 2011... meaning that this was right at the start of the whole New 52 Reboot stuff and so they could've presumably just retconned Bette's experience to make her an actual rookie sidekick instead of this weird half-measure where they both establish her past experience as canon while also otherwise ignoring it.

There's other stuff which I could go over; such as Bette's coma, her stint as Hawkfire, her enrolling in West Point... all of which probably has room for more detailed specific analysis by someone more familiar with both Bette and also the Batwoman comics (I've only fairly recently started looking into this stuff out of curiosity as I work my way through learning more comic history).

So I'll skip to a more recent appearance by Bette in 2017...

Detective Comics (1937—Present) #967

This whole exchange feels once again like Kate ignoring Bette's history, experience and capabilities. Especially the whole "pass second year in the top 99th percentile of your class and maybe I'll put in a good word with you to Batman" thing. No one else needed be top of their class at West Point, or attend West Point at all, to be a superhero. And it just seems strange to have Bette getting forced down that specific road.

Like; going by publication history, Bette was considered part of the original Teen Titans team due to debuting in the 1960s-1970s period. In fact she joined the team before the likes of Beast Boy, Raven, Starfire and Cyborg (at least in terms of publication anyway).

While I'm not entirely certain how her current age placement in the roster, they did still at least establish her as being a Teen Titan who fought Deathstroke and so presumably in the same generation as Nightwing (even if possibly a bit younger) and other core members. The from what I understand the Titans are currently considered senior and experienced enough to be the current "top team" of the hero scene in canon.

So all together this adds up to, as I keep saying, a strange contrast between Bette's stated/implied history and how she gets treated by the narrative.

DC's Legion of Bloom (2023) #1

Last year Bette did make a return as Flamebird (not Hawkfire). Which could mean one of two things...

Kate finally acknowledged Bette as ready/worthy/experienced enough to go out on her own

Bette went screw it and decided she didn't need Bette's permission

Honestly kinda hopping the later cause it brings to mind a bit of the Beast Boy comic which I quite liked...

Beast Boy (2000) #3

Better gets a very stern reprimand from Nightwing (some she admires), and is told she's not cut out for this world and quits. This comes after she's spent most of her appearance in this run being kinda a comedic relief in the form of her repeated failures to bail Beast Boy outta jail (since she's never posted bail before and didn't know how)

But after this..?

Beast Boy (2000) #4

She comes back, with a new (more practical-looking, as I discussed before) costume and beats up several bad guys to help out Gar (who in turn really appreciates her arrival and assistance).

Batwoman (2011) #3

Making this post I've noticed an interesting similarity and contrast between Beast Boy and Batwoman comics in regards to Bette. Both times, Bette gets very sternly reprimanded and told she's not cut out to be a hero and ordered not to be one by someone she admires/values the opinion of.

Both times she defies them and goes out anyway, putting on the same costume both times in fact.

But while the Beast Boy comic portrays her as competent and capable, even having her involvement appreciated by Gar...

Meanwhile in Batwoman?

Batwoman (2011-2016) #4

Bette's defiance almost immediately ends with her horribly injured, and in turn accidentally helps the DEO work out Batwoman's identity.

Two events regarding the same character which that character reacts to in a similar manner but one ends with her vindicated and the other... very much not.

DC's Legion of Bloom (2023) #1

Moving back to Bette's recent appearance in DC's Legion of Bloom. West Point is 4-years in total, and when we last saw Bette she was on her second year at the latest. So with the nature of comic book time, I find it unlikely she'd already graduated.

Her return to Flamebird could also have something to do with Infinite Frontier (I don't fully understand how it works, but apparently everything's canon now again sort of?) re-canonising Bette's competence? That sounds like kinda an amusing thought tbh; multiverse shenanigans happen and Bette wakes up one morning feeling suddenly competent again. Good for her.

Anyway I hope this is a good sign for Bette's character. Even if she's unlikely to be a major player, would still be nice for her appearance to at least depict her as capable. Plus as I said, comic book time means if she does actually stick to West Point, then she'd unlikely to be graduating (and get allowed to be a vigilante) anytime soon. So at that point you might as well just let her go be rich and play tennis since its not like that's a route to her actually doing anything.

Bette seems pretty neat from what I've seen of her, so I wish her the best. Even if Legion of Bloom continues the running joke of her trying and failing to recreate Titans West.

[shima-draws]

Hiya!! I saw you were having a hard time, so I'm here to distract you from the things!! >7<)/

Who was your first OC? What did they look like, mayhaps try to redesign/redraw them side by side!

I hope things get better for you soon!!

Aw thank you!!! 🥰

My first OC was either Shima or Riku, I can't remember for sure who came first but they've been with me the longest

And yeah I've redesigned them both lots of times already! I have a habit of redesigning OCs once every few years lol

First art I EVER posted of them? I had to dig into my old DeviantART account to find this, this is from 2011 holy SHIT?? Have I really been on the internet for that long? Anyway old art jumpscare warning

Aww. Baby Shima art <3

This was before Riku actually got a human form, he actually started out as a Pokemon OC that was like. A weird genetic mutation of Pikachu? Uncreative little me called him Rare Pikachu LMAO or RP for short. Neat bit of lore, when I eventually repurposed him to become Riku I kept those same initials. Riku Promethera = RP :") Just a callback to his origins <3 He's always been Shima's partner tho since the beginning which makes me really emo honestly

Anyway here have 10+ years of Shima and Riku art

Shima's hair has gotten noticeably pinker but her actual hair style has stayed relatively the same after the very first redesign. God it used to be so DARK and way browner but I think the pink fits the palette very well :"D

And Riku...I used to strictly adhere to the black color scheme but I think the new one with the earthy tones suits him perfectly since he's a land elemental!

Also I need to draw him pathetic and covered in blood again. Tbh.

[kermitgasm]

are there any songs you think they should bring back for the setlist or a song you wish they would play live?

also which live performances are your favorite? (you could even go by era cuz i think each era is pretty unique)

ok so i need to start this off by saying BRING POOL BACK IMMEDIATELY!! please with the intro and everything. it’s just so fucking good. next up, which i know might be controversial, but i’d love to hear fences live once (i would watch this video all the time when i was younger, it just seems like a lot of fun). i always think it sounds so cool. and then obviously i’m on my knees screaming and crying for them to bring back Let The Flames Begin / Part II, which i know they’re probably sick of but it always turned out so good!!! and Turn It Off & Careful are my #1 picks. like, genuinely I need to hear them live or else. Also, Sugar on the Rim.

anyways i used to be better at pinpointing my favorite performances because i would watch them to a point where it was super concerning, now i’m a bit more mellow about it. however, since you asked i will attempt to deliver. just for you, dear anon.

this is in no particular order or anything, basically i’m just going off what i remember really saying damn this is good about (which is super easy when you love a band like paramore).

First off let’s start with the Miracle Outro performed during Brand New Eyes era. this song just goes so fucking hard and i curse Josh Farro for the fact that he wrote it so they couldn’t record it and release it since he left the band soon thereafter.

Paramore at Wembley Arena in 2009 — This concert is so good. like thank god this person filmed it and decided to upload it to youtube. I cannot get enough of Intro / Ignorance. truly.

RTMorasonMD had a great full concert vid from 2010, the sound quality is great for 2010 too. considering most of the time videos look like they were filmed with an nintendo D.S..

Paramore at The House of Blues in Anaheim, California (2006) this is like nostalgia city for me. I remember running my old paramore fan account on instagram and stumbling on this and being like… i’ve hit the paramore jackpot. shout out to Paramore History for always posting the real hard to find stuff… where would we be without you?

When Paramore performed Careful at Warped Tour in 2011 or like the whole Warped Tour Set — i will say this over and over again on this post but i have to be real with you when i say, i watched these videos so much it’s crazy. but careful was my favorite. i love careful. any performance or careful and i’m there.

Paramore live in Paris (2013) when i tell you i watched this religiously i mean it. i could probably do all the dance moves / movements hayley did in this specific video way back when. i was obsessed.

Paramore performing Let The Flames Begin / Part II at Bunbury in Cincinnati (2014) i just love this one. like all of these are just nostalgic for me and i can’t help but want to show you.

When Paramore performed Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen and then it went into Hallelujah by Paramore (lol) at Parahoy (2016). What a way to open the show. i mean, i remember watching the final riot and being totally in love with Hayley’s voice and the way she sang it. I think I was introduced to Hallelujah by Shrek but Paramore was the second one to show me the ways of Leonard Cohen. Thanks for that.

I Caught Myself in Hamburg (2017) is an obvious one but I feel like I had to mention it… the emotion Hayley fucking pours into this performance makes me want to cry.

Turn It Off live from Grand Casino in Hickley, MN (2017) we’ve all seen this one i think? but what an incredibly breath taking performance of turn it off. i mean.. damn.

Fake Happy performed at Rock for People in the Czech Republic (2017) the quality is insane for this one. I remember being totally obsessed with this. so i’m adding it here; to share with you.

Pool / Idle Worship in Paris (2018) something must be in the water when they go to paris because i love these videos.

Pool live in Amsterdam (2018) is another one that came to mind cuz the sound quality goes crazy. it’s just beautiful.

The full 2018 RED ROCKS show because the sound is great and i just remembered being obsessed with this. you’re kinda cracking my head open like an egg with this ask and i love it.

Paramore at Concrete Street Amphitheater (2018) incredible footage, incredible show.

Simmer live in Bakersfield (2022) i have to add this because she’s gone too soon. like they should be performing this one nonstop. but i also understand crystal clear is a bop so it’s fine… i’m fine. PLAY SUGAR ON THE RIM OR ELSE!!!

Crystal Clear debut in Dublin / Dreams (the cranberries cover) (2023) I mean….. we all know about the Dreams cover but I just have to add it here because wow. i love it. it’s incredible. and the crystal clear debut is just insane because the person filming that knew what they were doing. High Quality to the MAX baby.

Crave / Outro live at The O2 in London (2023) I mean I just love this video. like, what’s not to love.

Speaking of quality, this video of You First performed in Cleveland Ohio (2023) is available to watch in 2610p60, which basically means it’s better than your eyeballs. incredible stuff. just insane.

there’s probably a whole lot more i can’t think of at the moment, maybe i’ll make a list eventually. but i hope you like this in the mean time. ❤️ thanks for sending me this ask and letting me talk about my favorite band. send me an ask anytime (goes for everyone, i love this).

[hoardlikegoldenirises]

after drawing the sparkly bider-man i wanted to make one for my AU... purely self-indulgent...

I doubt Peter would really take the time and expense to make a special pride suit he would only wear once or twice unless Johnny convinced him or smth so it's mostly hypothetical but still fun —

I was looking through my timeline trying to figure out when would make the most sense for this (which also included: has Johnny outed himself yet) and I ended up deciding 2014 makes the most sense because well, in 2012 he will be locked in a basement during June, and in 2013 he would be busy with Electro and finishing grad school, but 2014 is like... right after he and Flash get married so I can easily imagine Johnny being like "cmoooon let's dress up together, you just got gay-married" etc. and, well, peter does like to dress up... (otherwise he wouldn't be in spandex all the time 😂)

normally I avoid metallic or shiny spandex like the plague for suit designs cause I think it looks cheap but I made an exception for this 😂 it probably IS cheap...

closeups:

posing for pictures... johnny's idea, naturally. in my timeline i think johnny outs himself in like 2011 or so after a very messy divorce (from lyja) but I'm not spending too much time on the F4 stuff in this aside from just having a general idea so if they appear in a fic I know what's going on 😅 anyway by 2014 johnny is def way more comfortable with being publicly gay, since the cat's long out of the bag, though he's still got a lot of issues... but he's good at pretending to be okay :)

but also he still has a crush on peter 😂 tfw you have the hots for your superhero friend who just got married

peter actually already knows how johnny feels about him by the time he gets married, i just thought the dialogue was funny

I thought it would be fun if the lens frames were sparkly... normally I have his frames out of vulcanized black rubber (like car tire rubber) (...like might actually be carved from old tires) just cause I prefer the matte and slightly soft look compared to plastic... I figure something like sparkly firm silicone or sparkly plastic is probably pretty achievable for Peter to make. And the lenses would just be his normal bulletproof lenses but with an iridescent film on the outside to make them a little rainbowy...

and I think in 2014 irl holographic glitter spandex was like... something that existed that you could buy lol so i figure he can very carefully sew a holographic spider on.... so the spiders are like, that silvery white rainbow glitter kind of look

no webbing because there's a limit to how much labor and time peter would be willing to put into a flashy, kind of useless costume that he wouldn't be able to/want to wear very often... (and i wasn't a fan of how it looked)

bisexual fingers. there's a dirty joke in there somewhere.

it's difficult to come up with body-covering outfits that are suitable for summer weather as-is but the fact that he's wearing polyester spandex underneath really adds a layer of "i'm going to get heatstroke and die" to this outfit. lots of linen though. at least the armpits are athletic mesh.

also yeah the spidey shirt is a leotard with a snap crotch so. he's really just hoping that doesn't unroll under his clothes cause it would absolutely hang down very visibly from under his shirt if it were to fall. (maybe he can use his electrostatic sticking powers to just. hold it in place...)

he also can't roll down the waistband of his tights because it's more rigid than the rest of his costume on account of that's where he keeps all his spare web cartridges and it would suck if they all fell out LOL

hm i just noticed i accidentally gave peter a purple happy trail oops just pretend that's black

anyway

that's AU bider-man

oh

i also drew this which is much more corny/embarrassing but i thought it was a cute idea — by necessity has to be after flash is public and transitioning etc… so 2016 at the earliest but i drew this more like 2017 or 2018, after she's been on hrt and stuff and is probably more confident

i don't think there's a worry of accidentally spotlighting her/outing her because, well, she probably doesn't pass in a lot of people's eyes… broad shoulders, sideburns, etc. but… peter thinks she's pretty ❤️

i was gonna draw more of the gang but then the list kept expanding like, oh should i include X, what about Y? and it was. too many people. so then i just decided to only draw flash and peter 😂

they should have stickers on their shirts though... like a polyamory sticker... or pins...

[m7z]

In memoriam

I spent the last 30 minutes or so skimming through my Tumblr archive from 2011-2012 trying to find a post I know I wrote about my paternal grandparents’ love story, but I couldn’t find it. I probably moved it to another blog at some point and deleted it here. Along the way though I found all these other memories from my early 20s, such as my coming out/confession letter to a best friend from high school, many reblogs of sappy quotes/graphics/book snippets/lyrics, reblogs of photos of places I wanted to visit (many of which I’ve now been to), songs I liked, tech news from the era (like the death of Steve Jobs), political news from the era (like marriage equality, and Barack Obama’s reelection), many reblogs about Glee, my own photos from my early days of living in San Francisco (and interning at Twitter)… All of which is to say, it captured this whole era of my life from ~10 years ago that, in retrospect, was quite pivotal.

The reason I went looking for that post is because I found out yesterday that my grandpa passed away. My dad texted me and tried to call when I was in the middle of a work meeting. I registered the text but didn’t respond, and then called back after. It was the middle of the night in China at the time (around 2am), and he learned the news earlier when my aunt had called him, and she’d been notified by the staff at the seniors home where my grandpa had been living.

As I processed the news and decided on my plans, I told people the context that he had suffered a series of strokes and had been on the decline since last summer, so this news didn’t come as a shock. This is in contrast to my paternal grandma’s passing in January 2022 (also January) from a heart attack which was sudden, quick, and utterly shocking. As the matriarch of our family, her death had hit everyone really hard then.

At his passing, my grandpa was in his late 80s, possibly 87 or 88. Which is objectively quite a remarkable achievement for someone born into the chaos of 1930s war torn China to a poor rural/farming family. He joined the communist army as an accountant/admin, and then the local police after the war, and then worked at the state hemp/cotton company until retirement. He and my grandma met in their 20s, fell in love and got married despite oppositions (this is the story I had posted about that I was looking for), had 2 kids and 2 grandkids (one of which is me), traveled, had health issues and took care of each other, and grew old together.

I realized yesterday that I wasn’t reacting as emotionally as I did to my grandma’s passing — one because he’d been on the decline, and my dad/aunt thought he almost wasn’t going to make it after his last severe stroke in July. I think I had emotionally prepared for this back then, and so expected this to happen at some point. The other reason is that his quality of life in this last year, after these strokes, had become quite poor. He couldn’t eat or talk or walk, and had become reduced to almost just skin and bones. It had become painful to see him in this state, and I’m glad he’s not suffering anymore.

However, at the same time I still feel sad and regretful because I was hoping to see him at least one more time. Even though he hasn’t been able to speak since July, and he didn’t really recognize anyone anymore… even so, I was hoping he'd hang on until I visited again.

When my grandma passed in 2022, the pandemic, travel restrictions, and lack of flight options had made it virtually impossible to travel back. The last time I visited China was October 2019. Since then, in the last few years when we called, they’d almost always ask when I can go back again. My grandpa did this all the way up until his last stroke in July when he couldn’t speak anymore. When the pandemic largely ended in 2022, I’d always say “soon”, even knowing it was impractical with the Chinese government's onerous visa policies. When they finally reinstated the pre-pandemic visitor visa policies in March 2023, I started to say that I'll go back during the summer, then the fall, then the winter, then the spring. One reason is that the flight options were both expensive and inconvenient, but the larger reason is that I prioritized other plans in my life. I'm not sure where I could've squeezed it in, but I do regret that I didn’t try harder to visit sooner.

Circling back on the whole “eras of my life” thread — I always felt like as long as my grandparents were around, I still feel like a kid in some way. They treated me like one, still babied me whenever I visited or called, and would remind me of funny anecdotes from my childhood. I know I’m pretty lucky to have gotten 30+ years with almost all 4 grandparents in my life. I also know I’m lucky that they loved me as much as they did — because not all of my friends had the kind of close relationships I did/do with their grandparents.

Growing up, I was always pretty close to my grandparents, more so to my grandma who I genuinely enjoyed talking to and would call regularly, but I have many fond memories with my grandpa too.

I recall when my family first immigrated to Canada, I would cry about missing them. Later when I went back to visit as a teenager, I would cry on the flight back to Canada.

My grandpa liked to write simple rhyming poems after he retired, liked to drink and smoke and only quit in his 60s, and liked to sing Chinese opera. One year for my birthday, he wrote a “hidden message” poem where the first word of each verse added together would say “happy birthday <my Chinese name>”.

One really special memory of him I have is when I was in kindergarten, and during afternoon nap time (which I hated) he showed up unexpectedly and took me out of school. We didn’t live in the same city but he was in my city for a work trip, and he’d decided to take me out of kindergarten early that day so we could spend time together. I remember it feeling so unexpectedly awesome — one because I was doing something I wasn’t supposed to (skip school) but also because of the surprise visit itself.

The only time I felt emotional yesterday was when my mom told me how, even though I won’t be able to attend the funeral, I could pay my respects at both of my grandparents’ gravesites when I visit. The thought made me emotional because… they can finally be reunited again, or at least not be separated by death.

Didn’t really know what I was going to write when I started this, and the words kept pouring out, but I’m glad I did.

[sapphyreopal5]

I really enjoy your blog and I’m just curious to what you think of Justin Hartley, I don’t know much about him honestly

Hello Anon thank you for the ask. I don't know a whole lot about Justin Hartley or how him and Jensen met to begin with, but I'll give this my best shot. Justin Hartley was born January 29, 1977 in Knoxville, Illinois. He started his acting career on Passions as Nicholas Foxworth "Fox" Crane (2002-2006) and also starred on shows like Smallville as Oliver Queen/Green Arrow (2006-2011) which on a personal note is actually where I saw him for the first time YEARS ago ha ha, The Young and the Restless as Adam Newman (2014-2016), and then had recurring roles in shows including Revenge as Patrick Osbourne (2013-2014), Mistresses as Scott Trosman (2014-2016), This is Us as Kevin Pearson (2016-2022), and currently plays Colter Shaw on Tracker (2024-). He has 3 siblings, an older brother named Nathan, then a younger sister named Megan who is married to a Josh Jones and is notably in a lot of Justin's posts, and a half sister named Gabriela.

As you probably are aware, Jensen was announced as being cast for Russel Shaw Colter's, older brother on Tracker. I myself plan on watching the show, as a couple weeks ago my mom's boyfriend mentioned the show is decent prior to Jensen being announced for the show. Having looked more into things knowing myself, there are some interesting parallels a friend of mine told me about and also things I've noticed between Justin, Jensen, the roles they play/will play on Tracker and even the roles Jared and Jensen played on Supernatural.

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A post shared by Jensen Ackles (@jensenackles)

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A post shared by Justin Hartley (@justinhartley)

Fans and other people including myself started speculating it's possible that Jensen scored a role on Justin's show Tracker after this fan account created the Instagram post below, which clearly turned out to be correct.

Brotherhood/Family

For starters, Russell/Jensen is the older brother of Colter/Justin. Dean/Jensen was the older brother of Sam/Jared. It turns out that on Supernatural Sam and Dean before the first episode stopped talking to each other for 2 years after Sam decided he wants to go to college and stop hunting. On Tracker, it has been 20 years since Mary essentially severed the ties between Colter and Russell. John Winchester their dad also didn't talk to Sam in the same time period. Mary Winchester died when Sam was an infant and Dean was about 4 years old and John is "missing" but still alive when the show airs. However, on Tracker it is their dad Ashton who dies after he fell off a cliff named Devil's Notch and is believed Russell/Jensen who pushed him off by Colter/Justin and their mother Mary Shaw who is still alive. Interesting, on both shows their mother is named Mary. The roles of the dead parent are therefore notably swapped on Tracker and Supernatural.

It should be noted also that it is the 12th episode of Tracker in which Jensen will first appear as Russell airs on Mother's Day, which is May 12 this year. I speculated here that it seems 11 is a bit of a bad luck number for Jensen and noticed it show up on multiple addresses of his as far as numerology goes. In that post, I wrote:

If anyone reading this believes numerology has any significance, I also would like to point out how interesting it is that a lot of the addresses that he's been moving to and buying up since it seems things started to go downhill for Danneel and Jensen in 2018 contain the number 11. Heck, even the Colorado house stopped being listed as of 11/11/2022! In numerology, the number 11 has a lot of spiritual significance as it's said to be a master number and is said to be associated with what some call "twin souls" and soulmates (read the link for more info as to how this could apply here). Weirdly enough, when I was doing research on numerology and the number 11 this at one point showed up from a site called legalreach.com: "A Rule 11 agreement is an agreement between a divorcing couple that outlines how they will handle the divorce process and any disputes that arise. In other words, it's like a prenup for the breakup! It defines who takes what, when assets will be divided, and who gets custody of the kids." Never heard of it before but it stuck out to me while I was doing this research...

In another post, I brought up an Instagram post of Jensen's where he was wondering about the significance of the date 9/10 with regards to the ending The Boys season 3 AND the ending of Supernatural as far as filming dates go. I copied it below for your reference. My speculation of it from another post I created is "The description for this post says "What is the universe trying to tell me? 🤔". Looking at the date, the day after 9/10 is 9/11. Well Jensen, I can tell you one thing that this (and the other 11 related signs you keep missing!) means from Hermes: "9/10/2020 and 9/10/2021 being 1 year apart and 1 day before 9/11 along with several addresses of yours containing the number 11 is us seers telling you that you still have NOT found THE ONE you are looking for"."

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A post shared by Jensen Ackles (@jensenackles)

Perhaps 12 is the good luck number Jensen needs to get a bit of a "jump start" on things being back on "the right track". Google's overview of the numerology for the number 12 states:

The number 12 can also be a metaphor for the recursive nature of existence and the opening of new horizons, particularly in the quest for spiritual enlightenment. For example, the number 12 can mark the end of a cycle, which can be a divine sign from guardian angels that you need to learn to let go of the past and look to the future. The number 12 is also strongly associated with the heavens, including the 12 months, the 12 signs of the zodiac, and the 12 stations of the Moon and of the Sun. The ancients recognized 12 main northern stars and 12 main southern stars. In Hebrew, the number 12 signifies perfect government, or God's government. In Christianity, it is the number of Christ's disciples, and it occurs many other times in the Bible, for example, the Twelve Tribes of Israel.

Hmm...

Bobbys!

My friend told me that there is a character Colter goes to for help a lot named Bob Exler. Bobby Singer on Supernatural also becomes Sam and Dean's go to for info guy. Interestingly enough, Bob Exler is seen wearing prosthetic legs on Tracker as seen above. This is because Eric Graise who plays Bobby Exler was born missing fibula bones in his legs, making it so the doctors amputated his legs at a young age. Briefly on Supernatural, Bobby Singer in Season 5 Episode 1 "Sympathy for the Devil" becomes paralyzed from the waist down after killing a demon using Ruby's demon-killing knife. He regains his ability to walk in Season 5 Episode 21 "Two Midnights to Midnight" after making a deal selling his soul to King of Hell Crowley to know where Death is and also regaining his legs, even kissing him to "seal the deal". Interesting parallel here my friend noticed...

Jared/Jensen/Justin Siblings

I talked earlier about how Justin has an older brother named Nathan, as well as younger sisters Megan and Gabriela. Jensen has an older brother named Joshua and a younger sister named Mackenzie. Jared has an older brother named Jeff and a younger sister named Megan. Both Jared and Justin have a sister named Megan. Interestingly enough, Justin's sister Megan is married to a Josh (Jensen's brother's name) and Jensen's sister Mackenzie is married to a Jeremy (both women's names start with M and married to men whose names start with J). I can't seem to find any information about Jared's sister Megan and whether or not she's married, although it does not appear she is if I am to go based off her Instagram page. All 3 of them have a younger sister whose first letter in their name starts with M, and all 3 have an older brother. If we were to go based off of full blooded sibling, we could say all 3 of them are in this sense middle children. Just funny coincidences really. I also cannot help but notice that Jensen and Justin both start with J and end with N and also both have 6 letters in their names...

Smallville

Justin's character Oliver Queen was introduced on Smallville in Season 6 Episode 2 "Sneeze". Jensen's character Jason Teague was introduced in Season 4 Episode 1. While they did not star on Smallville simultaneously, both Jensen and Justin were first seen on the CW on Smallville. Technically, Justin was on a TV pilot for Aquaman (or mercy Reef), which was never picked up as a series but starred later that year on Smallville. They both were on Smallville but were not in the same season together.

Funny enough how with the connections I was talking about with Jared, Jensen and Justin's families, Jason Teague's mom was Genevieve Teague (ancestors of the witch named Duchess Gertrude) on season 4 of Smallville, where Lana Lang was eventually possessed by her witch ancestor Countess Margaret Isobel Thoreaux. In the show it was revealed that when Margaret Isobel Thoreaux was burned at the stake she cursed Duchess Gertrude''s heirs by vowing to wipe the entire family out when she rises again. Funny how Genevieve Teague was killed being stabbed in the chest with one of the 3 power stones on Smallville and Ruby played by Genevieve Cortese (now Padalecki) was stabbed in a similar location on Supernatural by Dean, Jensen's character. Given some of the other posts I've been making in recent weeks relating to Genevieve and black magic, the timing for Jensen Ackles being announced to work on Tracker with Justin Hartley, both of whom were on Smallville but at different times, is quite curious at the very least.

New J2 in the making?

To wrap this up, do I detect a possible new J2 in the making? It should be noted here how some people on Twitter have been talking about how "romantic" some of the Tracker promo photos with Jensen and Justin together appear. I admit the tone of the Supernatural promo photos with Jared and Jensen versus the Tracker ones with Jensen and Justin off set do have a bit of a different tone if you catch my drift. Tracker was already renewed for a second season, and it seems that Jensen has a labeled chair on the set of Tracker. Possible hint we will be seeing more of Jensen on Tracker in Season 2? He did say lately that if all goes as planned, it will be a busy year. Look below for some screenshots of some interesting reactions/posts/comments related to the Tracker promo photos, notably from Tom Welling, who was Clark Kent on Smallville the same show Jensen and Justin both starred on.

Those of us who are in the fandom are well aware of the Jared/Jensen "J2" tinhatters stuff, where some fans believe and speculate they are in a secret relationship and did from the get go. Seems that Jensen and Justin's work relationship with Tracker is starting off with some similar reactions from people...

[buckttommy]

i love ryan but i’m newer to fandom (joined during the s5 mid season hiatus) and i’ve always vaguely heard about The Incident but have never been able to figure out what actually happened?? other than it was something that got him labelled racist and if you like him you’re therefore racist too. you don’t have to explain what happened if you’re not comfortable w it but i’m very curious and i support him but idk how to defend that choice without knowing what actually happened, you know?

Hi anon! I'm glad you asked. Not a lot of people know the context surrounding The Incident and I'm tired of people's ignorance. Enough is enough. This is long, but stay with me.

In May 2020, one of Ryan's followers at the time went through his partner, Chrysti Ane's, twitter account and found an instance from 2011 in which she used the n-word. Considering this was only days after George Floyd was murdered (or might have even been the same day; I can't find the tweets that incited the incident) and tensions were already extremely heightened, this discovery blew up in a massive way.

Days later (May 31, 2020), Chrysti Ane wrote this statement and posted it on Twitter:

[img. i.d.: As these recent events unfold, so do heightened state of emotions. My family and I have been accused of being racists for the past few days and I think it's past time for me to address quite a few things. This all started when one of my partner's followers dug up a few of my tweets from 2011 (9 years ago) that used the n-word. I will not justify using that word, but I will explain myself. At the time I was dating someone of African-American decent [sic] and started diving deeper into the culture; I made tons of black friends, listened to music that used slurs, watched black comedians that freely used the word, and I felt accepted by the black community. At the time, none of my friends found it offensive, but I must say I also didn't fully comprehend the WEIGHT of the word. I didn't comprehend the history, the struggles, the oppression. I was a 16 year old girl in high school trying to find my place and figure out who I was. I am not a woman with my own family, a child, and a partner. I am NOT the same girl I was almost 10 years ago, I encourage you to look back at where you were 9 years ago and think to yourself "am I the same person?" That being said, this is my formal apology for those tweets and who they have offended. We must hold people accountable for things that [sic] have said or done and I am glad this has been called out and I can show that 16 year old girl isn't the woman I am today. I can tell you honestly I have grown immensely. My respect for the black community is massive. What they have endured, what they have overcome, and what they CONTINUE to go through on a daily basis has opened my eyes and my heart. I will continue to use my platform, as I have been, to do good. I have donated, tweeted links, and spoken my peace on the matter. I have stood up for the black community and will continue to do so. Now I'd like to address a different matter - blocking certain accounts. After those tweets resurfaced, I experienced hate tweets, hate accounts, memes with my image and my partners, name calling, and worst of all foul names about my son. After responding to a tweet saying something among [sic] the lines of "I have many black friends and I couldn't fathom seeing such a thing [as George Floyd]" one of the accounts that had previously been a part of the "hate tweets" had told me I made her "uncomfortable" because it seemed as though if I didn't have black friends I wouldn't care. I responded addressing her previous online bullying and proceeded to get hate. To that I must say, I have repeatedly attempted to turn focus to what's important-EQUALITY/HUMANITY. It seems as though everything that is said nowadays is dissected and the overall message gets lost. If you don't speak or use your platform, you're "racist" or "choosing the side of the oppressor" or "part of the problem" but if you DO say something without articulating yourself CRYSTAL clear with no room for interpretation you're "racist" or "making people uncomfortable" or "part of the problem." I simply want to use my voice for good. I want to help. I want to do my best to let the black community be heard and RESPECTED. Let's all be part of the solution and create proper change in this country so everyone can experience what America is supposed to be an stand for.

The same day (May 31, 2020), Ryan hopped on Instagram Live and addressed both Chrysti Ane's use of the n-word and his own silence over several days. [Full transcription here] I strongly encourage everyone to read the entire transcript, but for those who don't want to, most of his Instagram live was about his support for the black community. During his livestream, Ryan:

Highlighted the black community as being instrumental to his growth and development as a human being

[img. i.d.: "I love my black brothers and sisters. In fact, a lot of them have shaped me into the person I am today. I'm very thankful for their input, their insight and their culture 'cause [they are] as proud of their culture as I am of mine. And the great thing about America is we get to combine those cultures. Black lives definitely matter and they should resonate -- they are the reason that America is so great.]

Called out the racists who followed him specifically:

[img. i.d.: "If you are a racist and you're following me or you think that this whole Black Lives Matter is out of proportion or anything, get the hell of [sic - off] my Instagram, get the hell of [sic - off] my Twitter. I don't need you. That's not the America I want to live in. I'm a biracial man. I gotta accept more than one race anyways. So anybody that follows me needs to be part of the solution rather than the problem. And of top of that, this is a human rights issue."]

Highlighted the realities of systemic racism and the black experience

[img. i.d.: Our black brothers and sisters, who are human beings, are being mistreated by systemic racism. That racism has allowed white people to just hurt our own kind, our own humans. That sh*t, I can't stand for. And now how I see all this changing is not overnight. It's by each individual making that choice to stand up to the next individual who is next to him who is being racist or being ignorant or being naive. I can't even imagine what it would be like to talk to my son and tell him people are gonna look at him worse because of his skin colour. That sh*t hits deep. It hits hard, and not because some of my friends are black -- that has nothing to do with me, this ain't about me at all. It's, again, about humanity. It's how we treat our fellow people.]

Did research before speaking, sought counsel from the Black POC in his life, and reverted back to history to back up what he was saying to his followers

[img. i.d.: I was looking through things over the internet, trying to do my research before I spoke, and black people getting killed by white people for racist views is nothing new. I mean, you can go to the biggest names -- Martin Luther King [Jr.] in 1968, Reverend George Lee, one of the first black people to vote, killed by white people. And the "I can't breathe" movement? That was nothing new. You saw all the NBA players wearing "I can't breathe" shirts, anybody in sports, anybody in entertainment was wearing "I can't breathe" shirts. That was Eric Garner in 2014. Philando Castile, 2016. I am not painting every police officer bad because there are good police officers out there, so what I'm trying to say is this is directly to those racists out there, who have embedded themselves into the American society. You could be a person working at the movie theaters, you could be working anywhere to be honest. I don't care if you got a badge or not -- if you're racist, you're a racist. And your time is coming to an end. There's more biracial people coming into the world, there's more black people getting influence in the world, we got our first black president and hopefully not our last black president. This sh*t hits deep. I keep saying it. I employ everyone else do their research. Start looking at why everybody is so angry. You know, COVID-19 is an epidemic but this whole racial thing is systemic. It's been happening for 400 years to people with skin darker than ours, for no other reason than just that. So we need to call out people who got more power in this, those white people who have more power in this. I only know of one big attorney because I worked with them on a TV show, but Mark Geragos who has helped out P. Diddy, Chris Brown, and all these other people. Let him start speaking up. Come on, you got enough money now. Start standing up for the right reasons now. So also doing my research and talking to the cast of 9-1-1 and trying to figure out what [we] can do, how we can help out. Some of those don't feel what it feels like to be a black person and will never be able to, so how do we help? And Aisha, who plays Hen on the show, she was all about just support, reaching out, help whenever you can, wherever you can. You can go to Black Lives Matter, you can go to defund the Police, but in my personal opinion, defunding the police won't help because there are good police officers out there. You can also go to colorofchange.org, that's a good one. I see that a lot of people are trying to help out on that one, and there's a fund for George Floyd himself and his family. So there's ways to help out. Let's just find the right ways.

It was during this same livestream [on page 3/4 of the transcript], that Ryan says this about his partner's controversy:

[img. i.d. And now we're talking about different things now, now we're talking about her using the n-word. Let's address it, okay? You're telling her that she can't speak through Twitter to her black friends that have allowed her to say that back and forth to them, specifically? Mind you, that is a private conversation had on a social platform. I can see the misconstrued insight on that. That being said, I have plenty of friends - Black, white, Asian, Indian, Korean - and we make fun of each other's races all the time. We call each other slurs all the time. We don't get butt-hurt at all, nah, because we know the actual person, we know who each other are, we know we're not trying to bring each other down. So what are y'all trying to get it? You're trying to prove that somebody who is not racist is racist? Nah, you don't have that power. There is no racist energy coming from this household at all. In fact, we're helping. Again, being part of the solution rather than the problem. I know, for sure, that all of our friends would speak up to say the same thing. They know who we are. We know we're not about bringing down other humans, at all, not even caring about any kind of colour or nothing. So y'all need to stop with that. And if you're breeding hate and throwing it our way, you're wasting your energy and you're wasting your time.

This comment was the impetus for the "Ryan is racist" narrative. The following day, Ryan once again returned to Instagram live for a shorter livestream in which he clarified previous comments. [Full transcript here]. I can't add anymore images but to quote him directly:

What up everybody. So after having some time to really think about it and really calm myself down, I felt I have to clarify certain things. Let me first start off by saying I do not condone the use of the n-word by any non-Black person, that includes all Latinos. That's not our word, alright? So that people that are coming after me, keep that same energy for Cardi B, Tekashi 6ix9ine, Fat Joe, all of them Latinos who've been using it for years upon years and getting passes from and by 50 Cent and whoever else and what-not and saying it in their music. Keep that same energy. That being said, let me clarify and address the real situation at hand: When I said slurs, I came from an angry place. I couldn't think straight and I misspoke. All that was going through my mind is seeing these comments about my girl and about my one-year-old son. Seeing death threats to my girl, seeing this foul-ass language about my one-year-old son. And I misspoke. I meant to say stereotypes, and do I condone stereotypes? Nah. Now amongst friends, can friends make fun of each other? Yes. That being said, I'm not here to bring anybody down, no race down. As far as my girl goes, using the n-word nine plus years ago, she was I don't even know how old. 16? I think she's grown as a woman. I think she has apologized for it. I remember her doing a tweet last night apologizing for it. And I don't condone her using it. We don't use that word in this household; it's not our word. I'm not here to take away from what the black community has gone through, or take something from them. I'm here to help them in any way, through support, through anything. So that being said, I apologize to those that I have offended, and misrepresented myself by using the wrong term. I stand by my "try, fail, learn, grow" state of mind and I will continue to grow, I will continue to help out the community. So hope everybody has a great day, enjoys their life, and let's help our black brothers and sisters going through this horrible, difficult time. Alright. Now have a good one.

After his livestream finished, big entertainment new companies such as Variety, EW, and TVLine began pushing the "Ryan is racist" narrative, fueled by Aisha, Rockmond, and Oliver's comments on Twitter made the following day.

Aisha:

[img. i.d.: A tweet from Twitter user RisingTom that says: Maybe we should ask his black castmates how they feel about this. @/AishaHinds @/ImAngelaBassett @/traciethoms @/RockmondDunbar Ryan stays completely silent during this movement then comes on to excuse his wife's use of racial slurs & admits he & his friends use slurs all the time. @/AishaHinds: How I FEEL daily is a perpetual state of GRIEF. There's sadly no version of this indefensible discourse that doesn't exascerbate that grief. There's legions of learned behaviors that need to be named and neutured [sic] so we don't continue to give life to them. May we know & DO BETTER.]

Rockmond:

[img. i.d.: Two tweets from @/RockmondDunbar: As a black man this should go without saying but just to make sure people in the back understand when I say this with my whole chest: I don't condone the shit. I don't like the shit. And I've never been one to allow the word to be used around me by any non-black person...cont 2ND Tweet: And any alleged 'black people' that are co-signing their non-black friends to refer to them in that way need their entire asses checked. Too much history, too much pain. Past and present. Shit is utterly unacceptable.]

Oliver:

[img. i.d. Two tweets from @/oliverstarkk: I know a lot of you want to hear my thoughts on what a cast member said today on IG live. I can tell you that my opinion is there is absolutely no excuse for the use of the n word. It belongs to the Black community only and I absolutely don't agree with it being used by... 2ND Tweet: ...anyone else under any circumstances.]

Ryan apologized again after that in one of his final posts on Twitter, and then alluded to the controversy (and his response to it) once more on Instagram on his 34th birthday.

Those are the facts. Now for my opinions.

The response to Ryan and the years of backlash that have followed (mostly from white people) are completely disproportionate to the situation at hand. The controversy wasn't even his to begin with, but at the point where he involved himself in it for the sake of his partner, everyone (Ryan's castmates, the greater public, the fanbase, and Ryan himself) quickly lost sight of who was initially at fault. I don't think Chrysti Ane should be raked over the coals for comments she made 10+ years later, but the fact of the matter is that Ryan showed more contrition and genuine apology and desire to do better in his multiple apologies than she did in hers. Chrysti Ane victimized herself in her apology; Ryan didn't. That makes a difference.

I have always maintained, and continue to maintain, that BIPOC are allowed to feel about him however they want to feel because BIPOC communities were, in essence, targeted. But I encourage everyone to know the facts before making or maintaining any sort of decision or judgement.

And to all white people who read this and still decide not to like him, please know that I do not trust you. I probably do not like you. Not only have you inserted yourself in a discussion you absolutely do not belong in for years, but any continued vilification of a man of color after learning all the appropriate context is transparent and deplorable. For years, I have watched people hide their blatant racism behind empty activism, but there's no excuse for that now.

Here is all the context.

BIPOC, do with this what you will. White people, please keep your mouths shut on the matter.

[sylvaridreams]

To be frank and up front and honest with all of you I DON'T know how much longer I will be on Tumblr. I don't intend to delete this blog, and in the event that my main ever got nuked I have this side blog co-admined by a backup account, so my posts won't vanish. Not yet.

But I do not like what Tumblr is doing. I don't respect the decisions being made here and I think ignoring them longterm is insane and cruel at best, and ignoring them short-term and hoping it smooths out for now is no better. Like frankly it's just not. I follow my gw2 mutuals for gw2 so I don't expect you guys to be reblogging posts about the bans or anything, like this is the silly game zone. So that's not the point of this post. I'm not shaming the gamers for posting games instead of "holy hell they already banned another."

I do wanna say, I've had this blog almost 10 years (making it my oldest surviving blog! It's followed me from my first account that I made in 2011!) And for a long while I felt like an outsider to the gw2 community and it was really hard for me to find a niche where people didn't shun and ignore me. So I love you all and appreciate how welcoming everyone last year when I came back to gw2blr. I didn't expect that. I didn't expect I'd make friends out of this at all. I turn 30 in about 2 weeks, and at a certain point it's hard for me to meet people and make friends, even online. It's just tough to do somehow. You think at points "this is what I have now, from here to the end" and then new people are nice to you anyway. I love this community here. I hope we can keep playing and talking ocs and doing silly stuff at art party and tagging each other to say "this is nearly as sad and wet as your commander!" for a really long time.

And all that said. Maybe I'll leave. Maybe I'll start over elsewhere or just not have anywhere to post. I don't know. I'm trying out some other places. I'm investigating what my options look and feel like and determining where I might want to start planting seeds for sylvaridreams to start over.

If things go how I anticipate they will, I'll set up shop elsewhere. And I'll stop putting new posts here. And then I'll start cleaning up. Scraping out my old posts from the back to tidy up and consolidate for that new place. We'll see.

Even if everything does rocket to the bottom and fizzle out and some wealthy man's tantrum about trans people existing online shuts down Tumblr's servers for being completely unprofitable, I genuinely do hope that we can continue to have fun together somehow. Whether it's a mass relocation or just monthly art parties. Mayhe we'll see each other in game. Who knows.

I'm currently trying out cohost.org as a new place to post. I don't have a site set up yet for gw2 blogging but I might head that way soon, and meanwhile youre welcome to follow my main site if you want, it's damazcuz just like my main blog is. That said, if I do make a gw2 cohost I'll post about it again with a link.

This isn't a goodbye post and I'm not gone yet but I'm a sappy person and I like what we have here. And I want to give a solid heads up of where I might be heading before I just go.

[nadia-cannot-think-straight]

I have no idea if my Viktor ASU conspiracy theory is just a copium overdose or are they really cooking something there at riot. Like:

-My biggest evidence is that Caitlyn also got ASU before Arcane, for obvious reasons, her model was god fucking awful. And fun fact! Viktor's current in-game model is the oldest out of all the champions that are in Arcane. He isn't the oldest (ironically it's Heimerdinger and Singed) but i think he is the only one who did not get any significant model updates. He is still pretty much the same as he launched in 2011, minus VFX updates. I might be wrong though.

-But if we take it to account, it would be appropriate for him to get an update, mainly because his design and animation is pretty fucking bad. There is a goofy charm to it, but he looks like a gormiti action figure.

-Arcane is also now canon which sure was a decision. I have mixed feelings about that, but putting that aside, one of the rioters confirmed that they are going to change Viktor (and Camille) to fit the retcon. Camille worries me af, but this also isn't a topic so back on track. They did not reveal anything specific, saying that it would spoil season 2.

-Considering that statement, would that mean that they would transfer his show design to in-game model? Or perhaps draw some solid inspiration from it, which yeah i think that might be the case. Lol designs are overall way more cartoony than in the show, which has it purpose. But we will see how that works out (if it even does work out this is still insane speculation on my part).

-Other really weird thing for me is the fact that Viktor did not get anything this year (beside some chinese figurine which also included old dr mundo design so i wouldn't take it seriously). If they didn't plan some drastic changes they would have done something for him by now. Besides High Noon (which had to be in production before Arcane premiered) he didn't get any skin on PC or LoR, he was not added to wild rift (rip that one twitter account), no emotes, no new icons, nothing. Considering how fucking popular this guy has gotten thanks to Arcane it's really fucking strange for me that RIOT of ALL GAME COMPANIES would not capitalise on it. Obviously we still have next year, if he gets a new skin in 2024 my theory is ruined :( I know he was never popular enough in riots eyes to sell many skins, but look at this. Viktor Arcane is one of the most requested skins right now. It could be a pretty dope legendary if you think about it. Yet nothing has been done.

[kittykittyhunter]

The Archive

Introduction On 14 June 2020, I accidentally deleted my tumblr, wiping out a blog that I had been maintaining since January 2011.  I was distraught due to losing a lot of fond memories – and crushed at the thought of so much of my writing disappearing.  I hadn’t been very disciplined about keeping offline back-ups of my work, so when my blog disappeared, so did a large collection of poems, short stories, vignettes and fanfics.

Over the last few years, I’ve steadily recovered a decent chunk of my writing (about 300 pieces) thanks to my friends reblogging my posts and being diligent with their tagging systems.  I’ve now been able to archive and remaster my poems and prose pieces – though my fanfiction remains in the ether (which, to be honest, I’m okay with). On that note, I would like to express immense gratitude to the people whose blogs I recovered my works from:

alistersangelsong

@brattyhalfpint

caitsylph

@houkou-nrl

jirohoushi

kara-kitsu-x

kasukasumoe

@kidasbrainspace

@kunimitsuchin

lassinajumper

@lenandbonten

@mono-frog

@mon-qi

seethebattlefield

@s-ephiroth

@tacotits

@ten-thousands-hobbits

thunderdownongreenside-archive

I know a lot of these bloggers either are no longer on tumblr or use these accounts (and tumblr wouldn't allow me to tag everyone?); even so, I want to share my thanks. And thank you to everyone else who read, shared or otherwise enjoyed my writing over the years.  I hope that it inspired deep feelings and I hope that it bought you comfort.  I want you to know that I wouldn’t still be pursuing writing if it wasn’t for all the support you sent my way.  I read and savoured your comments and tags and, I promise you, I am grateful for all the love I received. Methodology While it would have been simpler to reblog the old posts, save for those that were trapped under a Read More (and a fair few pieces fell into this category), for this archiving project, I opted to take the opportunity to edit my works (also, I didn’t particularly want to bombard my friends’ notes by reblogging ancient posts).  This gave me a chance to appropriately re-format some works which had, unfortunately, originally looked quite ugly! The editing process was incredibly interesting – I ended up making changes to almost all my posts, so it’s good to know that I’ve definitely grown as a reader and writer over the last decade.  A very small number of the posts were brand new for the blog, but at this stage, I’m happy to count them as part of my archive.  For me, it’s important to compartmentalise and draw a divide between the writing I shared then and the writing that I will, hopefully, go on to pen in the future. I’m still in the process of proofreading: some of my tags have typos and there are certainly some errant dashes, among other issues, here and there.  Nevertheless, I’m satisfied with the state of things for now. Some posts are titled [‘Circa …’].  If I had been savvier about using tumblr mobile in conjunction with the web version, I could have recovered all of the exact dates of my original posts.  However, what’s done is done and I am satisfied with what I was able to accomplish. Statistics I love numbers – here are some interesting graphs regarding my posts:

Posts by Form - Prose – 37 - Poems – 271 Total – 308

No. of Posts by Year - 2012 – 1 - 2013 – 4 - 2014 – 21 - 2015 – 61 - 2016 – 114 - 2017 – 44 - 2018 – 22 - 2019 – 16 - 2020 – 20 - 2022 – 4 - 2024 – 1 Total – 308 There’s definitely a lot of writing that I wasn’t able to track down: in 2016, for example, I believe that I posted 366 poems.  Still, I’m pleased with the works that I did find – it was great to rediscover works that I’d completely forgotten about. I think that draws this post to a close.  Thanks for reading!