#and only notice once we've both left the apartment for the day

[oh-katsuki]

it's been a really long time since i wrote porn for porn's sake. here u go. it's alpha nanami :)) i don't have a title for it oops

cw: alpha!nanami, omega!reader, a/b/o, breeding, knotting, heat and rut cycles, dubcon on both sides, fingering, cohabitation, taboo, protective nanami, i feel like there is a slight primal kink in here, light dacryphilia,

wc: 3.1k

nanami didn't mean to take in a stray, but that's sort of how it happened. you're staying with him until a particularly careless friend helps to find a suitable living arrangement for you. nanami really isn't sure how it became his problem, but he'd feel awful if he'd told satoru no and left you without somewhere to go, no matter how against living with an omega he is.

frankly, nanami doesn't support the idea of alphas and omegas living together. he thinks it's a bit perverse. there's far too much at risk and the situation can become dangerous if it's the wrong pairing. sure, sometimes it works out. the better of his kind (of which he considers himself to be) give the necessary space and resist the temptation, but the others... take it too far. it'd be easier for you to live with a beta, and nanami wonders why satoru didn't first go to one of them. maybe your pheromones are weak and satoru isn't worried. that's probably why he hadn't noticed them when satoru first brought you by to ask if it'd be okay.

he knows that second gender is a spectrum. some alphas and omegas hardly emit any pheromones at all, even during heat and rut cycles. nanami thinks he likely falls into this category, seeing as he's never been particularly tempted by an omega and very few have ever been all too tempted by him, but it's a gamble. it's—frankly—unethical to ask this of him and though nanami knows that he should have said no, something in his good nature compelled him to say yes.

you've weak pheromones too, he thinks. he, of course, can feel them to a degree, but seeing as you mostly keep to yourself, it's hardly a problem in the first few weeks. frankly, the most tempting thing about you is that you're beautiful. you seem to have an almost standoffish air about you, proud and dignified, with a preference towards a more solitary and observant lifestyle. most of the day, the two of you hardly even see each other, going about your lives entirely separately only to settle into the same house for bed at night.

you don't say much when you're home. in fact, nanami would wonder if you could speak at all if it weren't for the conversations he hears you having on your phone and the little laughs or eyerolls you give in response to his comments. there's understanding there, but it's silent and you hardly ever dignify nanami's words or invitations with a response. maybe you're airing on the side of caution. he wouldn't blame you if you are. so, for the next two weeks the two of you coexist without so much as a hello between you both, silently sharing a space. you stay out of the way and nanami pretends that he isn't slightly unsettled by your constant proximity and the creeping feeling that you don't really like him all too much.

"they're a little difficult," says gojo over the phone. "kinda standoffish and really smart."

"so i've noticed," nanami responds. "i can't say i blame them though. you've put us in a weird spot."

"oh, nanamin, i know you well enough to know that you wouldn't lay a hand on them even if they begged," satoru laughs. "and they really might."

nanami grimaces at satoru's statement.

"i still don't understand why it had to be me," nanami says flatly. "you could have called ijichi. it'd probably be safer."

"how noble," satoru snickers, "but i trust you. hang in there a few more weeks. we've been working on securing an apartment for them and once we do, they'll be out of your hair. you're an angel for letting them stay." he sing-songs into the receiver. nanami holds it away from his ear.

"sure," he says. "it's not really much trouble... it's just.."

"that they're an omega. i get it. stay strong or whatever lol," satoru laughs. "unless of course, you really like them."

nanami huffs and hangs up the phone. satoru's got a good head on his shoulders, but he knew where that conversation was going. satoru was likely to say something about your heat cycle and nanami, being an optimist in cases like these, hopes silently that it won't come for another two weeks. he knows he could ask, but he worries about coming across as something of a creep. nanami is a little orthodox in the sense that he believes alphas and omegas should be separate for this reason exactly. suppressants exist but they don't always work and though nanami has sense about him, he's always had an insecurity about the kind of monster his second gender could make him. it sets him at ease a little that your pheromones appear as weak as they are.

you round the corner into the living room, standing just on the far end of the room. you're wearing pajamas, but you seem to feel no need to cover yourself or hide any perceived indecency. nanami glances at you, making a point to avoid looking at the shape of your body. it's inviting and you look at him for a moment with a small smile before raising one single eyebrow and letting out a low huff of air. nanami decides that you'd heard his conversation and he watches you shake your head as you move to the kitchen to peruse what he has. your hips, swaying slightly with each step, draw his attention to the curve of your ass and he feels ashamed for even having looked.

you're beautiful, that's certain. even the way you move is beautiful. nanami has eyes enough to see that. something stirs inside of you when he speaks, wordless recognition, maybe amusement or irritation, and vice versa. regardless, it's beautiful and nanami finds that the longer you're here the more he has to swallow it down.

you seem to get a little uncomfortable if nanami has people over, even for a moment. not that you've ever said anything about it, but you appear set on edge when he does so in the following weeks, it leads him to not bring anyone over at all. he can't bear the idea of making you uncomfortable. for as little as you've spoken to him since you've been here, nanami finds that he's grown rather fond of you. if things continue this way, he should hate it when you leave. admittedly though, he's looking forward to it a little. nanami feels that you're... a temptation. one he can't really seem to overcome.

one evening, you sit down in the living room with him. it draws his attention to look at you.

"i'm not mean, you know," you say flatly.

nanami is astounded to hear the cadence of your voice so clearly and without prompt. he can only offer a nod in return.

"i'm just picky," you continue, shifting in your seat as if you're made uncomfortable by the way you're sitting. "i have to be, being the way i am and all."

"i understand. i'm not offended," nanami says. "but some people would probably call that rude."

you smile at him, coy and delicate. "would you?"

"maybe," he offers. "if the circumstances were different."

nanami clears his throat, furrowing his eyebrows at your body language. something's off and he wonders if maybe your cycle has begun. he shifts on the couch and turns his full attention to you.

you move over to him and sit just adjacent to his leg. something in him stirs, primal and unrecognizable. you've never been this close and he only now notices that you smell nice, like something light and fresh.

nanami feels his chest stir. "this is the most you've ever said to me, i think."

"sorry," you say.

"don't be," he responds.

this conversation is awkward. it's loaded. it's like a conversation between two people who can't exchange more than a few words without experiencing intense sexual tension. he clears his throat.

"i need your help," you mumble, shifting closer. he knows what you're implying.

"i can't help you," nanami responds through gritted teeth.

"please," you say, standing slowly. you linger in front of him for a moment before reaching out and slowly straddling his legs. nanami flinches as you settle on him, pausing for a moment to breathe. "touch me."

you place your head against his shoulder, fingers grabbing his shirt as if you're agitated. the skin of your cheek is warm against his collarbone and he can feel your hair against his jaw. you twitch lightly when you touch him. carefully, he places a large hand on your head. your whole body flinches, unbelievable warmth soaking into his skin.

you feel like you have a fever and the next time you raise your head, your eyes have gone glassy, face darker. your lips are wet and lightly parted and a layer of sweat covers your forehead.

"not like that," you say, something needy creeping into your voice.

nanami, against his better judgement, rests his hands on your waist. you shudder under his touch and he slowly strokes the exposed skin of your sides with his fingers. trailing the pads of them against raised goosebumps on your skin. between your legs, he can feel heat. he knows you're wet and he knows what you want. nanami isn't sure he can give it to you, he's unsure that he should. it's not illegal, but he feels that it's wrong. something about it is fundamentally wrong and the situation goes against all of his morals. his mind still wanders.

you rest your forehead against his chest, and he feels your pheromones as they hit his nose and soak in through his skin. his body responds, tensing. your breath picks up, little heaves and pants, and you squirm down against him almost involuntarily. nanami feels himself grow hard. it surprises him and shames him. he feels heat rise to his cheeks at the realization that he's pressing up against the inside of your leg, something that makes you stir and settle directly over him. every exhale from you is a borderline whine and the syrupy smell of you grows more intense by the moment. nanami still runs his fingers along your sides, venturing over your tummy and back occasionally.

"just a little bit," you command, rubbing your cheek against him and then placing your mouth on the side of his neck and biting. "i'm sorry. just a little bit."

nanami winces and you drag your hips over him. his hands fly to yours, gripping hard enough as you make you whine.

"i can't," he grits out, speaking directly against the way his cock throbs against your core. he can feel it's dampness, a humidity that soaks through his pants.

"it hurts," you mutter and nanami feels an unpleasant stirring in his stomach. he hates the thought of you being uncomfortable.

"maybe we can find help-" you twitch over him, making him wince, "for you."

you shake your head, "you."

nanami exhales and tips his head back, his fingers still on your waist. he weighs the outcomes of this in his mind. he could push you off and fix you a blanket and a safe space, give you some tools to help yourself and then plug his ears and pretend he doesn't want to do it himself. he imagines the buzzing sound, the way you'd whimper from the other room over, still unfulfilled despite the aid. he thinks about your fingers between your legs, unsatisfying and only serving to worsen the itch. it makes him strangely jealous, nauseous almost, that you should be so uncomfortable in his presence.

you exhales against him and it's a near defeated sound. nanami's fingers buzz with adrenaline, his cock swelling and throbbing every time you so much as shift over him. there's a lack of control in this situation and his fingers move to comfort you almost against his will.

something natural and easy takes over as he slides a big hand down to the front of you and cups your cunt. it feels almost like an out of body experience, but both yours and nanami's humanity drips away slowly to make room for these primal actions. you shudder and nanami's chest swells with relief as he sees your expression. there's a need within him to care for you. it's protective, the same way he'd feel if you were in physical danger.

nanami moves his four fingers over you slowly, his breathing hitching as you push your body against him. he can feel your dampness soaking through your thin shorts and it isn't long before your relief gives way to more need.

"just this once, nanami," you breath against his neck. "please."

nanami's head is filled with something syrupy. probably you. it's probably a chemical reaction caused by you and he knows that any pheromones you're releasing are probably being released in equal amounts by him. they take up space in the room, crowding him so that all he can focus on is you, is the need between your legs that calls to him like song.

"okay," he gives in, pulling your panties to the side and dipping his fingers into you.

you shudder and let out a short cry, thighs trembling. he knows he won't be able to satisfy you like this, but he wants to try. nanami knows though that there is no such thing as nipping it in the bud with these sorts of things and as he begins to move his fingers inside of you with a beckoning motion, he feels himself slip farther away.

you're so wet, dripping down his fingers. your pussy clenches around them, begging for a knot, sucking the two digits up into you and then threatening to push them out. nanami has been with omegas before, but he's never felt himself slip away like this. his humanity leaves him in favor of something animal.

nanami shushes you quietly as he pulls his fingers from your body. you whine and squirm against him, pressing down and grinding against the bulge in his pants. he sucks in a sharp breath and quickly discard your bottoms, leaving you bare and exposed in his lap.

your cunt is sticky and shining, glistening with your wetness. he can smell it, the way you're probably fertile, and the perverse thought crosses his mind that maybe you deliberately avoided your suppressants so that he could do this to you. how out of character for him to think that.

for someone so proper, he makes quick work of pressing the head of his cock against your entrance. you push your body forward to try to take him in and nanami very quickly slides into you. you're tight and with the way your cunt makes him feel, he knows that the stretch must hurt you, but he can't seem to stop. he's so focused on quelling the ache within you, buried deep in that spot where his knot will inevitably catch.

you are barely capable of forming words now, dumb and deaf with your heat. any words of comfort nanami offers to you seem to go in one ear and out the other, but he offers them anyway. they're automatic and they come without his even needing to think about them. things about taking care of you, about knotting you the way you're begging him to, about making sure you're never alone when you have to do this. if he were in a better state of mind, he'd be mortified.

instead, he fucks his hips up into you, holding you by the waist against his throbbing cock. then, when that isn't enough, he lays you on your back on the couch and presses your knees to your chest so that he can go deeper. he needs to get deep enough to where his knot will catch, to be able to stay there to ensure it catches properly. he feels the way air leaves you with every fuck of his hips.

you raise your hand to touch his face, eyes glassed over and watering as gentle tears slip down your cheeks. a silent encouragement that pulls him from his thoughts back to you. nanami turns his head instinctively and kisses the palm of your hand. then, he takes your thumb into his mouth and bites down on the fleshly part at the base of it. he could draw blood if he wanted, but he doesn't. instead he takes your hand as it falls from his lips and kisses you plainly again on the palm before pinning it above your head.

"i'll take care of you," he grunts out and you nod deliriously.

nanami makes quick work of knotting you. he bullies his cock as far in as it will go, swelling and swelling until he sticks. you squirm as he does, gasps growing higher in pitch until you're silenced by the pressure deep in your abdomen. you cum around him, he thinks, pussy fluttering as it throbs around his knot. then, you exhale as the heat recedes into the background with this momentary relief.

nanami winces as he holds himself up over you, slowly returning to his head as the swell of pheromones recedes and leaves only the feeling of the space he takes up in your cunt.

you search his face for something, benevolence maybe, and nanami places a wide palm to your cheek.

"i'm sorry," he breathes as words find him again. "i didn't intend to-"

you shake your head, returning to yourself as well. "don't be, i wanted to."

nanami isn't really sure what to say and you wince under him as he settles his weight a little further, throbbing lightly at the mention.

"hold me," you ask and nanami obliges. he settles fully over you before lifting you so that you're straddling his lap again. you wince and nanami soothes you by gently stroking your face. it's automatic again, the urge to comfort you is well beyond his control.

something in you triggers something in him and it is two full days before either of you are lucid and well enough to separate. satoru calls him multiple times, but nanami ignores him, too preoccupied with his unexpected rut and keeping you comfortable. at present, he's well past the initial guilt and frankly, entirely hellbent on deciding that you should stay. so much for his practicality, nature won out in the end.

nanami doesn't really think he'll ever hear the end of this, especially not from satoru who, when he inevitably gets a hold of them, will tease so relentlessly that it might shock nanami and you back into your senses. he decides to hide out here with you for a little longer, filling the room with the scent of you both until it crowds out everything else. he likes the way you feel nestled up beside him, messy and breathing deeply as you sleep.

a tag for my friends @antizenin and @kentocidal bc they asked!!!

[kimpossibly]

little spencer reid drabble to get me out of a multi-month writing slump!!

warnings/tags: spencer reid x reader, established/secret relationship, swearing, r uses she/her pronouns

summary: after a situation out in the field leaves y/n temporarily blind, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep a secret.

"Here she is!"

Y/N could practically feel the hush that fell over the room as JJ wheeled her into the office. The thick bandage covering both eyes ensured that she couldn't very well see it. She did her best to give her most realistic Y/N smile to put them at ease. "Are you guys happy to see me or what? You're gonna have to tell me, cause if you didn't notice, I can't really see..."

She heard a few relieved laughs (thank god) and a mutter of "smartass" from Morgan. Suddenly she felt the comforting presence of Penelope beside her as she took one of her hands. "Can I hug you? I just wanna hug you."

Y/N laughed. "You can hug me, Garcia."

With only a little effort, Y/N stood from her wheelchair. Almost instantly she was engulfed by a classic Garcia hug—it was a little less frantic and intense than usual, but that, she assumed, was attributed to her current state of blindness.

Garcia pulled away and there was a moment of tense silence before her Disney princess-like voice asked, "Are you...is it permanent?"

"No," Y/N said with a shake of her head. "The surgery went really well and this is just the standard recovery process. I have weekly check-ups, but other than that, these bandages need to stay for at least a month."

"A month?" Derek repeated from somewhere on her left. "We're not gonna have you in the field for a month?"

"Oh relax, Derek. I'm sure you'll find somebody else to beat in arm wrestling for a bit."

There was a bit of uneasy laughter at that, but the reality was a bit too disheartening for anyone to really be genuine about it. Y/N hadn't taken more than a week off in her time with the BAU, and that was only due to an emergency. She'd be gone for longer than she'd ever been—and without her sight, no less.

"But who's going to take care of you?" Garcia said, sounding a bit like a worried grandmother. "You can't be alone at home all...blind! Do you have someone who can stay with you?"

Before Y/N can answer, Spencer's voice came from somewhere on her right. "I am."

There was another hush, and this time Y/N was almost glad that she couldn't see everyone's faces. She could hear her heart hammering in her chest. JJ was the first to speak following the announcement of this information. "Spence?"

"What? Her grandma can't make it into town and I've done extensive reading on the recovery process for this—"

"But you're just going to go back and forth between your apartment and hers for a month? Isn't that, like, an hour long drive?"

Spence didn't have a quick answer for that, so Y/N finally forced out the truth. "We live together."

Once again, silence. Emily spoke first. "What? Since when?"

"Three months and fourteen days ago," Spencer said. "But we've been together for seven months and eight days."

Now all Y/N could do was plaster on an innocent smile as she stared (hopefully) into space. "Surpriiiiiiiiise."

Then came the uproar. Penelope and JJ shouted questions at the same time, Rossi seemingly swore in Italian, Morgan muttered some kind of threat towards the both of them. Y/N found her head darting left and right as she tried to find some particular sound to focus on. A comforting hand rested on her shoulders and she recognized it instantly as Spencer. She put her hand atop his and waited out the colossal wave of shock and awe from the rest of the team.

"Hey, hey!" Y/N shouted to get their attention. They quieted down and she pursed her lips. "Look, I know you've all been suspecting it anyway—we're just confirming your suspicions! Not that we have much of a choice..."

"Seven months? You kept this from us for seven months!" Garcia exclaimed—not mad, just surprised. Maybe a bit exasperated.

Spencer let out a little laugh. "Hotch knew!"

Y/N practically felt it as all heads turned to Hotch, who just shrugged. "They wanted to keep it a secret."

And then, of course, the screaming was directed at Hotch, who willingly took the brunt of it and began to guide the outraged hoard of co-workers in a different direction. Y/N heard their voices diminish as they followed him towards the other side of the office. She blew out a large breath, laughing in relief. She let her head fall to her hands, running her fingers through her hair. “Should’ve expected that kind of reaction.”

“Why are they so surprised?” Spencer said. She could practically picture the confused knot between his brows. “Garcia and Morgan already had a bet that we were dating.”

“I think it was the whole ‘we’ve been living together for three months’ thing that really got them.”

“Hm. Possibly.”

Y/N looked over her shoulder, tilting her head back in the general direction of where Spencer stood. “Make me a coffee? I would do it myself, but, you know, I can’t see.”

She heard him laugh quietly and felt a little flutter in her stomach. She always felt that way when she made him laugh.

“How long are you going to use that excuse?” he said, already pushing her chair in the direction of the coffee station.

“As long as it applies,” she replied. “Or until I become Matt Murdock and have superhuman coffee-making abilities.”

“Matt Murdock has radar senses.”

“Still probably allows him to make his own coffee.”

They came to a stop and she heard Spencer shuffling around to make coffee.

“Hey,” she said, blindly stretching a hand out.

Within a second, Spencer’s hand found hers. “What do you need?”

She removed her hand away from his, searching all the way up his arm until she found his tie, pulling him in closer. Within an instant her lips caught his in a slightly off-kilter manner—she kissed the corner of his mouth, really. He adjusted quickly despite his surprise at the sudden action. His instincts told him to pull away, to reduce any risk that anyone saw, but there was nothing to hide anymore. So he kissed her back for a brief moment before breaking apart, a small smile on his face.

“What was that for?” he asked, their faces still inches apart.

Y/N just shrugged, a smile on her lips. “I just realized I could do that. So I did.”

He nodded. “Got it.”

She released his tie and let him get back to making coffee, not needing her sight to see the smile on his face.

[verstappensseatcushion]

✩°｡⋆ pas de deux, ln4 ⋆｡°✩pt 4

part one part two part three

pairing: lando norris x fem! ballerina! reader

[face claim: luna montana is largely used as faceclaim but some other pinterest girlies in there too]

summary: y/n is new to monaco and quickly finds herself dancing with mclaren driver lando norris despite all intentions she has of focusing on only her career

a/n: i did not proof read so im so sorry if there's spelling mistakes at all! hope everyone had a happy holiday

y/n.ballet posted on their story

⟡⟡⟡

"i think some of the other drivers should be here soon," alex, charles girlfriend, says loudly over the music.

you've been out with charles and his friends for a few hours now, meeting for drinks at someone's yacht and now at a club that you can't remember the name of. alex has quickly become the person you're clinging to, as one of the only other girls out.

"oh! i didn't know anyone else was coming," you yell back. she shrugs and gets up to pull you along with her to the dancefloor.

when you return to the booth in the corner there are more guys at the table, all laughing to themselves as they take a round of shots. charles being the first to notice yours and alex's return goes to introduce you to the new arrivals.

"everyone this is y/n," his words slur together a bit, he then points to everyone, even the ones you've met already, and reintroduces them. "and lastly we have lando."

he looks familiar, and not just from seeing him on tv or in advertisements around monaco, but it's like you've met before.

⟡⟡⟡

y/n.ballet posted on their story

⟡⟡⟡

it's been at least an hour, and a few more drinks, since the other drivers met you guys at the club. you, alex, lando, and charles are sitting in the booth after everyone else abandoned the group for dancing. you've been sitting quietly, giggling with alex, as charles and lando go back and forth telling stories about each other.

alex leans towards charles, whispering something into his ear. he nods and then announces that they're gonna leave soon.

"i should leave too, its getting late i think," looking at your phone you see it's nearly 2am. you go to crawl out of the booth and stumble a bit trying to gain your balance. a hand reaches and grabs your arm steadying you.

"is someone taking you home?" lando asks looking down at you, hand still on your arm.

"that's a bit forward isn't it?"

"wha-oh, not like that, i mean how are you getting home," he sighs, "you're clearly drunk y/n, and no one in their right mind would let you get home alone."

giggling you try to touch both your fingers to your nose (not entirely correctly but the thought was there), "see not drunk im fine! plus i dont live far im just going to walk back to my apartment,"

"let me walk you?" he asks, moving his hand to the small of your back as he guides you to the exit.

...

"and tulip fever is why I like tulips so much, it's honestly one of the best movies I've ever watched," it's been about 20 minutes of you blabbering non-stop, walking through the middle of the street as lando follows you, "oh my god I walked into you the other day that's where I know you from! je le savais! I was on my way to classes and completely walked into you, im so sorry by the way. I can be so out of it someti-"

"breathe," lando cuts you off laughing, "I don't think you've stopped talking once since we left."

you blush with embarrassment, "I'm so sor-"

"don't apologize it's cute, I like it," he cuts you off again, "do you know where you're going, or have you just been walking down random roads hoping your apartment appears?"

you point at the building on the corner, "it's this building! I know where I'm going!"

"are you sure? because this the second time we've been on this street."

"yes I'm sure," you laugh, swatting at his chest.

he follows you as you enter the door code and walk up the stairs to your apartment door, "you coming in?" you ask.

"not tonight, just making sure the pretty girl made it home safely," he smiles, giving a half wave as he goes back down the stairs.

"goodnight lando."

"goodnight y/n."

⟡⟡⟡

y/n.ballet

liked by ybfusername, landonorris and 4,019 others.

y/n.ballet à propos de la nuit dernière 🌷

ybfusername you better be prepared to explain those flowers missy

username5 where's the dress from?? 😍

username2 gorgeous smile

view 43 other comments

landonorris

liked by y/n.ballet, username3 and 320,872 others.

landonorris about last night 🕶

username1 that second pic omg

username3 DJ LANDOOOOO

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[holdmytesseract]

moodboard by @mochie85 divider by @fictive-sl0th <3

Summary: It's been a long time coming... But now the day for you and Loki to say 'Yes' and enter the bond of marriage has finally arrived. A covenant for eternity.

Chapter One - Of Cakes and Dances

Warnings for this Chapter: fluff, bit of suggestive smut

Word Count: 2,6k

a/n: We officially start our road to the wedding, guys! 🥳 In this chapter we have some cake tasting and dancing. Enjoy! 🤗

A huge shoutout goes out in this chapter to @chennqingg ! She crafted the beautiful wedding invitation! Thank you so, so much, my friend! 💚

💍 Chapter Zero °☆• Chapter Two 💍

Baby Fever Masterlist °☆• A Covenant for Eternity Masterlist (coming soon!)

A rather loud knock against the main door of Loki's (and now as well yours) apartment echoed through the hallway and rooms; even reaching you in the bathroom.

Not that this was a problem so 'early' in the morning - well, not usually, but today was Saturday and both you and Loki had your 'day off'. Given that fact, your fiancé was still sound asleep and you, well... You had just stepped out of the shower mere minutes ago.

"Gimme one minute, pwease!" You called out of the door frame; tooth brush in mouth.

After quickly getting dressed and at least halfway ready, you jogged towards the door; opening it slightly out of breath.

"Morning, babes!"

Natasha was standing in front of it; big smile on her face and a small sized parcel in her hand.

She immediately noticed your laboured breath and flushed face, of course - and Nat being Nat, she couldn't let this just pass.

"Had to dismount your princely stud first?" Your best friend asked boldy; throwing you a dirty smile and wink.

You blinked.

"What? I- No! Nat!" Once your brain had caught up you immediately 'defended' yourself; gently slapping her shoulder while laughing. "You and your dirty mind! Geez, I was just having a shower and about to get ready for the day. You were the one interrupting me and forcing me to hurry, babes! Besides is my..." You lifted your hands to draw quotation marks into the air, in order to quote Nat. "... princely stud still asleep."

The widow had done nothing but smirk and giggle while you had explained 'the situation'.

Now she shrugged her shoulders. "We both know it could've been both." "Oh shut up!" You giggled and then proceeded to hug her. Only halfway unfortunately, because the little parcel was kind of in the way.

"What have you got here?" You asked then; nodding at said rectangular carton box. "The reason why I am here." Your best friend smiled. "I was just returning from a run, when the postman delivered this for you - and I may have a guess what it is..."

The gears in your head were turning, until realisation hit you; eyes widening.

"The wedding invitations!" Natasha nodded. "Yup! I mean, it's about time they arrive. We've only got three months left..."

Three months... Three... Natasha was right. Only 85 days left until you were going to marry the love of your life.

"By the Norns... How did the year go by so quick? I could swear Loki just proposed to me and now we are already getting married?" Your best friend giggled, "Well, like I already said... It was about time for Loki to get that ring." and handed you the parcel. "If you need help with these... You know where to find me." The widow gave you a wink, then turned to leave. "I'll see you!"

You smiled. "Bye! And thanks, babes!"

Later that Saturday - after you finished your business in the bathroom and Loki had made it to leave the bed as well, the both of you took a look inside the parcel together. Until now, you had just seen a rough blueprint of the invitations and not the originals. Excitedly, you opened up the package - and couldn't believe your eyes. They were absolutely stunning. Beyond your expectations. "Baby, look at that..." You carefully took one in your hands. Loki just chuckled, "I am looking, darling." and leaned over to press a kiss against your temple. "I love them!" You stated; eyes still clued to the green and golden card.

The god nodded approvingly. "Indeed. They are beautifully crafted. More than fit for an invitation to a royal wedding."

You giggled. "Yeah? Are they fulfilling the princely expectations?" Loki gently squeezed your side. "Of course, love." "Shall we send them out then? It's time, isn't it?" He smiled at you; blue eyes shining with love and anticipation. "I'd be more than happy to do so."

You and Loki spent the rest of the day with folding the invitations, putting them inside an envelope, labelled said envelopes and of course send them out. Some of them were handed over personally and some reached their receiver with a little help of seidr.

Sending out invitations wasn't the only thing you and Loki had to still 'get done' for the wedding. Oh no... Two big things were still scribbled on the 'to-do' list - of which one was to practise your wedding dance.

You and Loki had already chosen the songs and a 'choreography' was made. The only thing what you still had to do now, was practising. Your soon-to-be husband hadn't really a problem - given the fact that he was a prince. He learned how to dance in his youth.

As for you... Well... You struggled a little bit, but you were confident. Plus, you had the best teacher...

"No, my love," the god spoke through the music with a chuckle; shaking his head. A snap of his finger later, the song stopped. "You..." He adjusted your arm around his shoulder gently. "...have to keep your arm like that. Unless I won't be able to lift you properly." You sighed. "Sorry, babe. Asgardian dancing isn't my cup of tea, I'm afraid." Once more Loki shook his head; the man bun keeping his curls from tickling your arm. "No, don't say that. You never danced like this before - of course you need more time and practice." "Yeah, but... We already practised this about ten times..."

Loki chuckled. "Yes and you're doing wonderfully. Do you wish to know how long it took me to learn all this?" You just nodded. "Over a year." That left you speechless. "Exactly. Now come on." Loki got into position. "Let's do it again." You agreed; getting into position as well. "At least I can waltz and we have to practice part two of our dance not remotely as much..." "You say that as if it meant nothing, darling. I'd be so bold and say that not every Midgardian woman can waltz." "Yes, but-" "Ah.Ah," Loki tutted; interrupting you. "No buts. You are my dancing queen." His words left you blushing, and before you were able to say something, he 'switched on' the music again.

You quickly tried to focus; recalling the dance steps you had learned already - and it worked. It really worked. You smiled as you moved with Loki over the rich marble floor in one of the dance halls in Asgard.

Practising in Asgard? Yes. Why? Loki insisted, since one: The actual dance would take place here as well, so it was better for the practice and two: Because the professional dance lessons (if you would choose to take some) were for free. Plus, nearly every Asgardian was a literal dance professional...

Since you (and Loki) wanted to keep things even and make a mix of an Asgardian and Midgardian wedding, the dance consisted of two components. You'd start with the Asgardian part and then switch over to the Midgardian. Two realms, two songs - and actually two dances. The waltz was no problem for you, but the Asgardian dance style was...

With the ending of the last tunes of the beautiful musical piece, you and Loki took your 'final position' as well. Your right arm draped over his shoulder; hand resting on the nape of his neck. His right arm was in the exact same position. Your forehead was leaned against his; skin on skin and eye to eye.

The god smiled, "Well done, love." and broke the position to catch your lips in a small, gentle kiss. "See? You did it." "Almost," you corrected him, but couldn't help but smile as well. Loki rolled his eyes - still with that smirk on his face, "We'll get to it, I promise." and took a step back. "Let's start again."

Loki distanced himself from you and got into position, with his hands crossed behind his back. Then he snapped and the song started from the beginning. The both of you started to walk towards each other graciously. Once you were an arm length away from your soon-to-be husband, you curtsied. Just like Loki took a bow. In rhythm with the music, your right palm found his left palm; forearm to forearm and other hand neatly resting on yours and Loki's back - and so you started to dance.

Loki slipped into a fresh t-shirt, while he made his way towards the bathroom. Knocking gently, he called out your name; gaining your attention.

"Love? Are you ready? We have to go in about ten minutes. Unless we'll be late."

Loki's 'wake-up call' caused your eyes to widen slightly. You may or may not have forgotten the time a little bit while showering... "I'm on my way, babe!" You quickly hopped out of the shower and into a fresh pair of underwear, before blow-drying your hair - at least a little bit (It was late summer, so actually not a big problem since it was pleasantly warm outside.), and got dressed in your baby blue summer dress.

Once you left the bathroom, your fiancé was already waiting for you; leaning against the wall with the car keys in hand.

"Are we ready?" You smiled and stepped up to him; winding your arms around his neck. "Eager to go?" The god chuckled. "It's about cake, darling. Of course I am eager."

You giggled and pecked his lips. "Let me just grab my purse and then we can leave." Loki nodded; watching you walk past him.

The two of you had an appointment today at the best pâtisserie in down town New York City in order to do a cake tasting. It was about the wedding cake, of course and you both agreed that it would be best to try some things first, before you'd decide about the interiority of the three-tier wedding cake. The design and decoration was already set and arranged with the pâtisserie. Now you and Loki had to do the 'fun' part... Tasting different fillings and flavours.

Your destination was a twenty minute car ride away from the Avengers compound. Give or take.

Luckily the traffic was not a complete chaos, so you made it to arrive in time.

The pâtisserie was bustling with people - of course. After all, it was the best in down town; yes, probably in whole New York City.

With your hand snugly wrapped up in Loki's bigger hand, you waited patiently in line until it was your turn. "Hi, we have an appointment for a wedding cake tasting," you explained to the friendly looking young man behind the counter. His eyes widened when he looked at you and Loki; recognising the both of you for sure. "Oh, uh, yes, give me a second, please..." He said nervously, looked down and seemed to search for something, until- "Ah, yes. Please follow me." You nodded with a smile. The young man's cheeks reddened and he smile bashfully back at you.

You and Loki followed him then to a little back room with two doors, a small grey sofa, white counter and some bar stools. The wall was painted in a beautiful shade of pastel orange and a few art pictures hung here and there. It looked quite neat and cosy.

"Have a seat, please." The man gestured towards the sofa. "Riley will be with you in a minute." You smiled, "Thank you." while your fiancé gave him a nod. Once more the young guy smiled shyly and fumbled nervously with his fingers. "It's an honour to have you here, Ms. Y/L/N and Mr. Laufeyson."

For the first time since you entered the pâtisserie, Loki spoke up; leapfrogging you. "Well, it's a pleasure to be here." You silently agreed with the god; who still held your hand in a snug grip and made sure you were standing close to him.

Even though you were about to be married, he still showed the people who you belonged to. Guess some things never change, you thought with a smile; looking at your engulfed hand. You didn't care, though. Quite the opposite... Loki's slight possessiveness was attractive and admittedly sexy in your eyes.

The man opposite you blushed in a dark shade of red, "That's great to hear." before shuffling his feet. He was on the verge of leaving the room, but before he did, he turned around to face you and Loki once again; seemed now to have scratched all his bravery together and ask: "I-I know this is p-probably inappropriate to ask, b-but may I get an autograph l-later?"

You smiled brightly. The guy was kinda cute, you couldn't deny that. "Of course. Just hit us up before we leave again."

The young man's eyes twinkled with happiness - and relief. "T-Thank you." Then he left the little room and you and Loki alone.

About five minutes later, the other door at the side wall opened and in came a woman in 'workwear', bright pink hair, glasses and quite a few piercings.

You and Loki were sitting on the sofa - like instructed; hands still intertwined and resting in your lap. Your free hand was on Loki's thigh, close to his knee. When you saw the woman, you both stood up.

"Hi there!" She said in a happy, enthusiastic tone and crossed the distance to meet you and shake your hands. "I'm Riley, we talked on the phone. Nice to meet you." You shook her hand, smiling. "Y/N and Loki." The friendly woman winked, "I know." shook Loki's hand as well and gestured for the counter with the bar stools. "Shall we move over?" "Sure." You and the god followed her. She went behind the counter and you both got comfortable on the stools.

"Alright!" Riley drummed her fingertips slightly on the wooden surface; smiling. "We already talked about your wedding cake in general a few months back. All that's missing are the fillings - and that's why you're here today. I prefer to do that in terms of a tasting, because it guarantees that the cake is really after your taste. But, before we do that I have to ask if you'd like to make any last minute changes, regarding the style or decoration of the cake?"

You and your fiancé exchanged a look and simultaneously shook your heads. "No, it's perfect the way it is."

Riley clapped her hands. "Alright. I'll go, fetch the things we need and then we can start, yes?" "Perfect, thank you."

Just a few minutes later, she returned with a big tray full of small, round cakes. They were neatly arranged and, of course, labelled. Riley put the tray down on the counter in front of you and Loki. Your eyes roamed over the different cakes with their different fillings and you just couldn't wait to taste them.

"Okay," started Riley with a smile. "I put together a wide range of different stuff and flavours. We've got some classics like vanilla, chocolate and strawberry, but also a few special - some might say exotic flavours like mango, melon and matcha, and of course some which are refined with alcohol and coffee."

"Start which whatever you like." That was a sentence you and Loki didn't let yourself tell twice. You dived right in, always splitting the tiny cake in half and tasted the delicious treats.

Both, you and your soon-to-be husband didn't think that deciding on three different flavours for your wedding cake was that difficult - but by the Norns, it was. Almost everything just tasted absolutely wonderful and exactly that was the problem - and that you and Loki had different favourites...

"Okay, okay..." You said, taking a deep breath. "Compromise, babe. You decide on the top cake, I get the bottom one and we choose the middle together?" The god nodded; giving you a smile. "Agreed."

In the end, Loki chose chocolate-mint, you mango-maracuya and together you decided on something with a little kick - Baileys. Three completely different flavours, hopefully one for everybodys taste.

Here's the beautiful invitation @chennqingg designed!

Tags: @muddyorbsblr @mochie85 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @jaidenhawke @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @multifandom-worlds @jennyggggrrr @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @fictive-sl0th @herdetectivetheorist @hisredheadedgoddess28 @chennqingg @princess-ofthe-pages @km-ffluv @brokenpoetliz @huntedmusicgardenn @lokiforever @stupidthoughtsinwriting @loz-3 @jaguarthecat @icytrickster17 @eleniblue @yourfriendlyslytherinhc @mypainischronicbutmyassisiconic @kimanne723 @lou12346789 @smolvenger @lokisrealpurpous @isaidoop @lokisgoodgirl @aagn360 @cakesandtom @alexakeyloveloki @glitchquake (Continuing in the comments!)

[cheolism]

good things from bad days

✧ wen junhui x f!reader ✧ summary: jun returns to the apartment after you've texted him that you've had a bad day. seeing you drunk, jun decides to take care of you like you've taken care of him. only you are much more honest with your feelings when you're not sober. ✧ wc is approx 5.6k ✧ tags: fluff and comedy; roommates-to-lovers, mutual pining. in a relationship but only you two don't know. domesticity, knowing someone intimately. drunken confessions. ✧ warnings: this is not edited. despite jun being sober while reader is drunk, he doesn't do anything that takes advantage of this. this is ultimately: we've loved each other for five years and you admitting you're in love with him while drunk gives jun the push he needs. drink responsibly, kiddos. ✧ drabble sequel here!!!!!

When you had texted Jun that you were having a bad day, Jun didn’t quite know what to expect. You had your fair share of bad days, unfortunately; Jun wished every day was filled with nothing but happiness and contentment for you, but he was just one man and couldn’t fight the whole world. 

(Once, when you were having a bad day, a barista had nearly made you cry. She had given you a once-over, looking you up and down after you gave your order. Then she gave a little huff, irritated, before turning around and walking away.

Jun didn’t throw a punch at the barista because 1) she was, at the most, eighteen, and 2) it just wasn’t in his personality to do so. But he did leave a negative review and said he found a hair in his drink.)

Today had started out good, he had thought. But then around noon he got a message about your boss, and then twenty minutes later you were saying that you just wanted to be home, that you couldn't take another minute at work. His heart had broken, reading that.

But Jun did what he did whenever he noticed you were looking particularly sad. He went out and bought a bouquet of flowers, stopped at the little Chinese place that knew the both of you by name. Left a fiver at the little shrine in the back of the restaurant, placed his palms together, asked for your health and happiness, just as he always did whenever the two of you stopped. 

“Say hi to your lover for me!” Auntie Meilan waved, grinning at him. “Bring them in next time!”

“I will!” Jun called back, saluting and neglecting to correct the Auntie that no, you weren’t his lover, you were just his longtime roommate that he had been in love with for far too long. 

That was all. 

Night had long fallen on the city, street lights dim and headlights bright. Jun hated getting off this late. He hated it because it meant he missed out on the normal mealtime for the both of you, and he knew that instead of you just making food for yourself or even making a meal and saving some of it in the fridge for him to have later, you would hold off on eating altogether until he got home so the two of you could share dinner and talk about your day. 

Which was why he volunteered to grab food. 

Jun’s stomach grumbled as he walked to the car, and if he was a lesser man he would’ve torn open the takeout box and ate his portion right then and there. But he wouldn’t. Couldn’t. No matter how hungry he was. 

“You wouldn’t be so hungry if you actually ate a meal at lunch instead of just eating those shrimp chips you like so much.” You had said once, watching as Jun tore open a container of cherry tomatoes and began eating them whole as soon as he walked through the apartment door. 

He had gasped dramatically, and still chewing the cherry tomatoes, scolding you. “How dare you talk about my precious chips as if they’re nothing more than a mere snack! They’re in a league of their own, they deserve an entire meal dedicated to them --”

“Okay, shrimp boy,” you had amended, your brow furrowing in adorable concern. You had rounded the island and went to the cupboard, withdrawing with a box of pasta. “Hold your horses and I’ll whip up some pasta. Don’t make yourself sick on those.”

The smell of takeout permeated the car, to the point where Jun couldn’t even smell it over the vanilla scentsy you had gotten him. It took far too long for Jun to get to the apartment, and every time the light switched to red Jun wanted to just slam his foot down on the pedal and speed through the intersection. 

But he didn’t. 

The man with the french bulldog was walking the dog around the parking lot when he pulled in, and gave Jun a short wave in greeting. Spotting the takeout bags in Jun’s hands, he called out, “Must be your night to make supper!”

Ignoring how misogynistic that seemed and how Jun was the one to primarily make your meals, Jun gave the man a tight-lipped smile. “Yeah, haha. Nothing like takeout on a Friday night!”

“Tell your sweetheart I said hi!”

Again neglecting to correct the man, Jun made his way into the building. He greeted the old woman who always sat in the foyer because you always greeted her, remembering how you once commented on how she must live alone or feel lonely, to spend her entire day in the front watching people come and go. 

Jun took the elevator on the right, despite knowing that you didn’t trust that particular elevator and all the squeaking and moaning it did. He felt bad for the next person who would use the elevator, knowing they would smell nothing but delicious Chinese food. 

As Jun shoved his key into the hole to unlock your apartment door, he got the distinct feeling that something was off. He didn’t know how he knew, but Jun knew without even stepping foot into the apartment that something was wrong. 

This didn’t dissuade him; instead he hurried in, calling out for you as soon as the door was open. 

“I’m home! Food is acquired and ready for consumption as soon as you are!”

He kicked off his shoes, ignoring the shoe rack you had insisted on buying, and made his way to the kitchen. He set the takeout on the island, peering around the apartment for you. 

As it was Friday, the apartment was slightly a mess. Socks littered the floor, and Jun spotted your pants near the corner of the couch. He entered the space, noting the nearly-empty bottles of vodka and pineapple juice. There was an empty bag of chips -- his shrimp chips. 

He called out your name again, rounding the couch. The living room blankets were in complete disarray, and your laptop was propped up on the coffee table. There were a few crumbs on the couch, and Jun spotted a muffin wrapper on the floor. 

“Wen Junhui!”

Arms were suddenly around his middle, pulling him back and squeezing. Jun immediately knew it was you, and turned in your arms. You were already grinning up at him, slightly too-wide and with eyes that glittered brighter than usual. 

“Junnie,” you whined, pitching forward and burrowing your face into his chest. Bewildered, but slowly coming to a realization, Jun wrapped his arms around your shoulders and held you to him. “I’m so glad you’re here!”

“I’m glad I’m here, too,” he agreed. You tightened your grip around his waist, leading him into a swaying motion. “Are you okay?”

You pouted, resting your chin on his chest in order to look up at him. “No. I had a bad day. And I’m drunk.”

You may be drunk, Jun acknowledged, but you were no less beautiful than when he left you. You were smiling at him like he was your favorite person on the planet, as if he was the person most dear to you, as if he was someone you treasured and loved, and Jun couldn’t help but giggle and bend down to press a swift kiss to your forehead. 

“Yes,” he laughed a little. “You are drunk. I brought food home.”

You gasped, mouth gaping and eyes widening dramatically. “For me?”

“For you!”

Squealing, you burrowed your face into his chest. He hoped you couldn’t hear the way his heart was threatening to leap from it. “You’re amazing! You’re the bestest!”

Squeezing you one last time, Jun reluctantly pulled himself away. While he loved hugging and loving you, and would gladly do nothing but that for days on end, you were drunk and vulnerable. “No, you’re the bestest.”

You frowned at him as he untangled himself, whining. Jun couldn’t help but coo at you, reaching out and pressing your cheeks together. You were so fucking cute. 

“Noooo,” you protested, hands reaching up to cover his. “Youuuuuu!”

“I greatly disagree,” Jun said. He pressed another kiss to your forehead and pulled away. He rounded you, hands going to your shoulders, and began guiding you towards the kitchen. 

Jun was careful to make sure you didn’t hit a hand or foot on the couch leg, gentle and slow enough to ensure you weren’t going to stumble. All the while you were chattering to him, telling Jun about a show you had watched as a child. 

“I don’t know that show,” he admitted, guiding you to sit down at the island. He left your side to return to the takeout, pulling the boxes out of the bag and setting them on the counter. He then went to the dishwasher and pulled out chopsticks. “I grew up in China, remember?”

“Ooh,” you said, eyes wide. It reminded him of Bambi, almost, how innocent and sweet you seemed like this. You were always sweet, he knew, but there was something especially child-like about you when you were like this. “I forgot.”

Jun set your chopsticks in front of you. He then went to the cupboard and withdrew two cups, quickly filling them with water and setting them down on the island. “It’s okay. We can always watch that show later.”

You nodded somberly, puffing out your cheeks. He couldn’t help but grin at how intently you were watching him open up the takeout boxes, your eyes taking in his every move. Jun picked up his chopsticks and clicked them at you once, watching your eyes focus, before reaching for the box of noodles.

“Hey!” You snapped, reaching out and smacking his hand. Jun startled, dropping a blob of noodles on the counter. “Where did you grow up! In a barn? We use plates when eating in this apartment, young man!”

“Yessir!” Jun returned, roughly saluting at you. He stood up and went to the dishwasher, and when he set down two plates you gave him a sharp nod of approval. 

“Good.” You glanced down at the mess of noodles. Frowning, you hopped down from the barstool.

“Where are you going?”

“To clean up your mess, Mr. Junhui,” you slurred, rounding the island to grab paper towels. He couldn’t help but laugh at the serious look on your face, as if he had committed a serious wrong. 

He was going to clean it, of course, after your meal. But he said nothing as you walked to his elbow and leaned against his arm, reaching and collecting the fallen noodles. “Dirty boy.”

Jun nodded, still smiling. “Yes, I’m a dirty boy, aren’t I?”

You returned his nod, still serious. “But you’re my dirty boy.”

Suddenly feeling his heart warm with affection and adoration, Jun inclined his head. “Yes. I’m your boy.”

Satisfied, you tossed the noodles and paper towel into the sink and returned to your seat. You brought the plate between yourself and the boxes, and Jun watched as you, very carefully, lifted your chopsticks and grabbed the box of sesame chicken. 

Even as the two of you ate, you were speaking. Jun listened as you talked about this woman at work who did nothing but complain about her children and husband, but then also said she was trying for a fourth, and how you didn’t think she had ever said a single nice thing about her family since you’ve met her.

Then you were frowning seriously at Jun, pointing at him with your chopsticks. “We won’t end like that no matter what, right, Junnie?”

“Right, darling.”

You set your chopsticks down on the table, reaching out with your other hand. Your hand wrapped around Jun’s cup and brought it to your lips. “Wait -- that’s my cup, I’ve already drank from it, it has my cooties.”

Jun watched you pause for a few seconds, eyeing him over the rim of the cup. And then you raised it to your lips and gulped it. 

“There,” you said, sighing in satisfaction. “Now I have your cooties.”

You then opened up the steamed vegetables, delight taking over your features. Jun continued eating as you shifted through the vegetables, picking out the broccoli and placing each piece on his plate. Jun ate them dutifully, shoving each piece into his mouth. 

“Careful,” you scolded, “you’ll choke.”

Jun watched as you then set down your chopsticks on the counter, the metal clinking against the surface. You pointed at him, peering at him with an extremely serious look on your face that didn’t really suit the situation and had Jun fighting to keep his smile off of his face. 

“Listen here, Wen Junhui,” you slowly began, brows furrowing. “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you to not stuff your mouth. But I’m serious. Choking is not a joke. It’s not fun. Have you ever been choked before?”

You had begun gesturing with your hands during your little speech, and at the end of your statement you waved your hand and sent your cup tumbling. 

Jun jumped up, rushing for the paper towels and rounding the island. You were blinking at the water even as it dripped into your lap, and Jun shoved away the cuteness of how you looked, confused and taken aback, and ushered you off the stoll. 

“Oh,” you mumbled, moving. 

“It’s okay,” he soothed, “we just have a small ocean in our kitchen. I’ll clean it up while you get changed out of your pants.”

He spun a few too many towels from the roll, focusing on turning the cup upright and wiping down the counter before moving onto the mess on the floor. You were still muttering to yourself, and it wasn’t until you made a small “oh” sound, followed by the sound of something hitting the wall, did Jun turn around. 

You were standing in front of him, legs completely bare and leggings sitting sadly on the floor from where you had thrown them against the wall. For a moment Jun couldn’t help but look -- look at your thighs and take in the shape of them, the color; his eyes trailed down over your knee and to your legs, taking in the spots where you had attempting waxing and given up halfway through, leaving bald patches on your leg surrounded by hair.

But fuck, if he didn’t want to wrap his hand around your leg and guide it around his waist, pull you tight against him and feel your body pressed against his. 

“Staring is rude,” you said, flapping your hand towards Jun. 

“Mm,” he hummed, turning his back to you. Jun dropped to the floor, beginning on the small puddle that had formed. “I won’t mention all the staring you do at me when I get out of the shower, then.”

“That’s not fair, though,” you argued. Jun stood, knees cracking, and watched as you stomped your foot. The fat of your thighs jiggled at the movement, and he wanted to dig his fingers into your flesh and see how it molded around his digits. “You know what you look like.”

“I do?”

“Irresistible,” you said matter-of-factly.

He echoed you, the word and its implications not really registering with him until he said it himself. And then the little light in Jun’s head flicked on, and he squinted at you. 

It wasn’t like you made it a habit to be drunk; you didn’t. In the years Jun’s known you, in the years he’s been your roommate, he’s only seen you properly drunk a handful of times. But he knows what you’re like when you’re drunk: you’re giggly, silly, and honest. 

“Alcohol is like a truth serum for me,” you had told him after a few weeks of meeting. “Get me drunk and I’ll tell you anything. It’s why I can’t be President: I’d reveal all the State secrets.”

And sure enough, Jun found out that when you were drunk, you were incredibly honest. He could ask you any question he wanted and you would answer. He had once tested this by asking you if you had ever lied to your grandma before. Sober you had frowned at him and shook your head, saying you had nothing to really lie about; drunk you had bursted into tears, sobbing about how you had lied to her about your whereabouts on your 21st birthday by saying you had been safely drinking with your friends at their apartment instead of being out at clubs. 

So: drunk you was as honest as you could get. You weren’t inherently dishonest, but all of the little things you were ashamed of or kept secret bubbled out. 

Irresistible. 

Truthfully, Jun wanted to poke at this some more. He wanted to ask you to elaborate, and he knew that if he was quiet for much longer you would elaborate yourself. 

But he didn’t. He couldn’t.

It felt wrong doing that. You trusted him. You trusted him when you were sick, when you were drunk, when you were in tears; you trusted Jun when you were at your most vulnerable, and taking advantage of you in this state, even to just question you about your feelings towards him, was wrong. 

Jun instead began talking, filling up the empty space with his own chatter in order to get your mind off of him in the shower. He narrated what he was doing as he did it, loudly, speaking everything as it appeared in his mind. 

“I’m going to throw away these towels. I know you don’t mind it when I leave wrappers around, because you do it too, but I know you hate it when dirty things are left. Like I remember you scolding Seungcheol for leaving his sweaty undershirt in our bathroom. 

“Gosh, I’m going to have to take the trash down next time I leave the apartment. I know you don’t mind doing it, but I also know you don’t like it particularly either. I’m okay with that. You do enough for me, I don’t mind doing this.”

Jun rounded the counter once more, reaching out for you. You went easily, hugging yourself close to him. Despite the alcohol you had drank, you still smelled like you: fresh linen, oranges and lemons, the sort of things that reminded Jun of home. His favorite smells in the world. 

He swooped down and pressed a kiss to your forehead, smoothing your hair away from your face. You blinked up at him lazily at the gesture, eyes taking just a moment too long to open. “Ooh, are you my tired baby?”

You hummed, nodding sleepily. Then you opened your eyes, your arms going over Jun’s to wrap around him in return. “Yes. Your baby.”

Jun tapped his hands against your lower back, leading you into a sway. You complied easily, grinning and rocking back and forth. Your warmth was pressed against his front, your weight in his arms a comforting one. 

Sometimes he felt selfish for having you like this. Like he was keeping you from someone, like he was wrong for keeping you a secret from the world, keeping you up here in your shared apartment. 

Sometimes it felt wrong, leading you into a dance during the late evening, wrapping his arms around you, kissing your forehead. But the thing was, Jun wasn’t stupid. 

You didn’t share an apartment with someone for nearly five years without there being something. You didn’t settle into a routine for five years, didn’t spend hundreds of nights pressed together on the couch watching television; didn’t wait up until late in the night for him to return, didn’t welcome his mother and little brother into the apartment with welcoming smiles and hugs. 

He didn’t remember the last time you went on a date. 

Or: Jun didn’t remember the last time you went on a date that wasn’t with him.

Yes: Jun wasn’t stupid. 

He saw it. He saw how you took care of him, how you always made sure his favorite snacks were in the cupboard; how you went out and bought new soles for his shoes when he complained about his back hurting too much; how you looked at him when he wasn’t looking, how your voice always took this gentle tone with him, as if he was someone precious, someone you treasured. 

He knew you were in love with him. 

Just like he was in love with you. 

But actually saying it, actually bridging the gap? 

Jun sighed, pulling away. He looked down at you, his darling sweetheart with sparkling eyes. He brushed your hair back away from your forehead. “Let’s go find you some pants, baby.”

You blinked up at him, seemingly unable to process. Then you pouted, lips poking out and eyes furrowing. 

Oh, how cute you were --

“‘m not cute,” you childishly protested. You blinked again, and Jun felt his heart plummet when your eyes took on a red hue and tears began to swell. 

“Baby!” He gasped, hands moving to hold your cheeks. Jun brushed away the tears that began to drop with the tip of his fingers, feeling concern bubble up within him. “What’s wrong, darling?”

“You just --” A little sob left you, and you threw yourself forward and into his arms. Jun stumbled back at the sudden addition of your weight, his arms wrapping tightly around you. You nuzzled into him. “You just take such good care of me, Junnie.”

Jun chuckled, squeezing your shoulder. “I’m just returning --”

You shook your head against his chest. He reached up and brushed your hair back again, revealing a single red eye and tear tracks on your cheeks. “You don’t understand, Junnie! You -- you’re so good and handsome and sweet and silly, and I love you so much.”

His heart thudded against his ribcage; he was scared it was going to burst from his chest entirely. 

Jun smiled down at you nonetheless, cupping your cheek in one of his hands. “And I love you.”

“No,” you shook your head again. “You don’t understand. I love you. Like. Like Captain Ri loves Seri.”

Jun’s heart flew out of his chest and left the building. It fucking flew away, soared through the sky and and rounded the earth. As a matter of fact, it took his brain with him, and the two decided to fly up to the moon and wave at the stars. 

“You -- like. Like marry me levels of like?”

“Yes,” you sighed, as if he was dull. “We’re gonna move out of the apartment because we can’t have cats and then move into a little townhouse and adopt two of them so they don’t get lonely, and I’m gonna buy you a ring to match mine and we’ll share a bed and I love you so much.”

Jun’s heart returned to his chest and was fluttering and acting as if it were a butterfly trapped within his ribcage; his brain, however, was still up with the moon and sun. 

Then you grinned up at him, tear tracks still visible against your cheeks. “Dude, we should adopt like, twelve cats.”

And he remembered the bottle of nearly-empty vodka, the spilled water, and his sensibilities. You were drunk, and while you were an honest drunk, it wasn’t fair of him to do this. 

It wasn’t fair of Jun to pester you further, to make you unravel all your secrets; not when you were vulnerable like this. No matter how much he wanted to, how much he yearned to know about the sincerity of your words, he couldn’t. 

Jun pressed a kiss to your forehead again, closing his eyes and exhaling. He felt you mirror him, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to his chest. 

“Love it when you give me kissies,” you mumbled against him. 

“Well, I love kissing you.”

You blinked owlishly up at him, mouth agape. “Really?”

He laughed, both hands going to cup your cheeks and hold your face so he could press another kiss to your forehead. “Really, darling.”

Your smile was brighter than any star or sun in the universe. If you were sober, Jun would swoop down and press a kiss to your lips, but alas. 

Instead he began guiding you towards your room. “I think we should get some pants on, don’t you? Wouldn’t want you getting cold. I heard that if you get too cold you turn into a penguin, no joke.”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Uh-huh,” Jun returned, reaching over to turn on the light of your room. Your room was messy, proof of how hard of a time you’ve been having lately. Clothes were strewn about, and your blankets were in a tangled mess. One of your pillows was on the foot of your bed, and your precious stuffed koala Jun had gotten you during one of his and Joshua’s dates to the fair was on the floor. 

“People don’t turn into penguins, Junnie,” you said. 

“They do if they’re cold,” Jun said. He left you standing in the doorway, moving to your dresser and pulling out a pair of sweats. “That’s how we got penguins. They’re just evolved from cold people.”

You were squinting at him when he returned. Jun held out your pants for a few moments, but you made no move to grab them from him. Finally you took your pants, holding out your hand; he offered his arm, and you held onto Jun as you slowly stepped into your pants one foot at a time. 

“I want you to know that I know you’re making this up,” you told Jun.

Jun laughed, shoulders shaking. He ducked his head, blonde bangs obscuring his vision. Your grip on his arm eased, and your other hand was smoothing back his bangs and revealing his eyes once more. 

“There you are,” you cooed at him, “my pretty boy.”

Then you yawned, wide enough to where Jun swore he saw down your throat. Despite seeing that, Jun still felt nothing but love for you as you blinked up at him sleepily, smiling like a dope.

“Okay, why don’t you lay down in your bed?” Jun pulled away, capturing your hand and pressing a kiss to your fingers. “I’m going to go get you some water, and then I’ll be back. All right?”

Jun returned to your room a few minutes later, cold cup of water in one hand and headache pills in the other for the morning. Despite the overhead light being on you were splayed out on your bed, face down and limbs going in every direction. 

He paused for a second, worried. Then he saw your back slowly move up and down. Assured he hadn’t walked in on a crime scene, Jun continued his way into your room. He set the cup and pills on your bedside table before leaning down and yanking the blankets out from under you. 

Grumbling, you rolled over on the bed and allowed Jun to gather the blankets. He took a few seconds to unravel them, and when he did he laid each one over your body. 

You hummed in approval as he tucked the blankets around your body, patting your arm and legs as he did so. “All snug?”

“Snug,” you agreed. 

Jun grabbed your koala off the ground. He hugged it to his chest, breathing in your scent that had rubbed off on the stuffie. Jun pressed a kiss to the koala’s forehead before setting it on the bed next to you. 

Your breathing was completely evened out as he smoothed your hair away from your face. He traced his fingers alongside your temple, your cheek. He ran his pointer finger over your nose, feeling the decline of it. Your lips, feeling the plush flesh give beneath his finger, watching as you subconsciously licked your lips. 

God, Jun was a fucking creep. 

Jun pressed a kiss to your forehead, finally retreating. He made his way from your bedroom, only pausing when he got to the doorway. Jun hovered his hand over the light switch for a moment, hesitating. And then: 

“I love you.”

And the light was switched off. 

You were conscious for only a handful of seconds before you were fleeing from the warmth of your bed and sprinting to the bathroom, the pressure of your bladder too great to wait a moment longer. 

Jun was laughing loudly through the bathroom door, and you opened it once you were finished washing your hands. Glaring at him, you flicked your still-damp hands at him, splashing him with droplets of water. 

“Hey!” He laughed, reeling back a little. His eyes were sparkling, and his pretty pink lips were parted to reveal his grin. “Stop bullying me!”

“You’re the bully,” you mumbled, reaching up and shielding your eyes. Natural sunlight shined through the windows of your living room, reaching into the bathroom and offending your sensitive eyes. You shot Jun a glare as he laughed some more, flicking off the bathroom light and retreating to your room once more. 

The sound of footsteps followed you. “I left some medicine by your bed for your headache.”

“Don’t have much of one,” you replied. 

“Probably because you’ve slept until three in the afternoon,” Jun returned. 

You spun around, eyes wide. Jun was leaning against your door frame, arms crossed over his chest. The sleeves of his grey t-shirt were rolled up to reveal his biceps, which were constantly gaining size as he increased his visits to the gym. His blonde bangs brushed against his eyes, and you couldn’t help but follow their movement as he flicked his head to get them out of his eyes. 

“Three?”

“In the afternoon,” Jun finished. You sat down on the edge of your bed, crossing your legs. Jun sat down next to you, though he laid back and let his arms fall above his head. “Should’ve woken me up.”

“I tried, Grumpy,” Jun said. He reached out and tapped you, and you fell back to lay beside him. “Several times.”

“Evidently not hard enough.”

“Next time I’ll play the trumpet, if you want.”

“I guess that’ll work.” You stretched your arms over your head, and when you rested them your pinkie was brushing Jun’s. You tried not to think about it, but every time your fingers brushed it was as if every nerve in your body was concentrated on that one point. “I wasn’t horrible for you last night, was I?”

Jun shook his head. You turned your head slightly to see him already staring at you; when your eyes met, he smiled. “You’re never horrible for me when you’re drunk. Now when you’re sober --”

“Oh, hush,” you said, reaching out and slapping his arm. He let out a small noise of pain, but you ignored it. You shifted onto your side, leaning down and looking at him. “I really didn’t do anything bad?”

Humming, he tilted his head. He moved one hand to rest behind his head, and the other reached up for you. Your eyes fluttered as his hand brushed over your forehead, fingers gliding through your hair. “Nothing bad, but you said some interesting things.”

Fuck. 

“Fuck,” you hissed. Your heart began to pick up speed, as if you were standing in front of a thousand people getting ready to perform a song you’d only heard once before. “Fuck.”

“Don’t worry!” Jun assured you, his fingers tracing over the shell of your ear. He pinched the lobe of your ear, causing you to wince. “You only confessed that you found me irresistible. And that you love me like Captain Ri and Yoo Seri love each other.”

You furrowed your brow, watching Jun. He stared up at you, eyes half-lidded, lips twisting into a little grin. He looked perfectly at ease, but at the same time, there wasn’t a single hint of true mischief on his face. 

“Did I really?” You asked, voice small.

Jun nodded. His fingers dipped underneath your ear and traced your jaw. “Really. It was cute.”

“And?”

His fingers rested on your chin. He shifted his hand, and then his fingers were brushing against your lips. You let Jun trace your mouth, still leaning over him, heart beginning to calm. Jun’s touch was easing your nerves, and his apparent acceptance and serenity soothed you into following suit. 

This was what often happened, you knew. Jun and you were both introverts; you didn’t like new situations. You hated crowds, hated the loudness of them and how close everyone stood together; you hated the unknown. But then when Jun was beside you, his features neutral and seemingly unbothered, it did something to you. It was as if his tranquility tricked your anxiousness, leaked into your soul and tamed the rough seas.

“And,” Jun murmured, “I love you.”

It was like when you found a blanket at the store and sunk your fingers into it, the feeling of smooth softness encompassing your digits completely. But instead of just your fingers it was your entire soul. 

It wasn’t a big revelation, you thought; not a huge unknown that needed to be answered. 

It was just another fact of life, you figured as you lowered your head to Jun’s. He shifted, elbows pressing into your mattress, raising himself to you. It was just another fact. The sun was yellow, the moon was white, the ocean is big and Wen Junhui loves you. 

With your lips pressed to his, you had one last fleeting thought before his mouth consumed yours entirely: now you didn’t have to feel bad about not correcting the Aunties at the restaurant about him being your boyfriend. 

[anonymityisfunwriter]

Timeless - Part 4: "In The 1500's, Off In A Foreign Land"

"If I first saw your face in the 1500's off in a foreign land, and I was forced to marry another man, you still would've been mine..."

Summary: It's the kind of love you find once in a lifetime, the kind of love you don't put down, and somehow, you know you would've found each other in every life.

'Timeless' Chapter List | The Grumpy Sunshine Series

Your eyes flutter shut as the summer breeze fills your lungs. You grip the stone balcony with all the strength you can muster.

"Your highness," Bucky announces himself.

"James, please, spare the formalities," you halfheartedly beg of him. You both knew what was coming. You couldn't bear the cold formality in his voice reminding you. "We're alone out here."

Spare the formalities, he does not.

He softly inhales, holding his head high and his jaw tight, "Your highness, the guests will be arriving shortly."

You pay him no mind, instead, you stare out into the garden. The one that held all those stolen moments, lingering touches, and longing glances. "The garden looks particularly beautiful this time of night, doesn't it?"

"Your betrothed," he pointedly remarks as though to remind you that you were never his to begin with, "...will be here shortly."

"James... please."

He can't stop himself from taking his place by your side when he hears the plea in your voice. He knows he'd be killed if someone caught him here in this moment with you. Still, he takes your hand, grazing over your fingers in tender strokes.

It's the last time he'll ever have you like this. He may as well make the most of it.

He glances over to you, his gaze soft and swimming with despair, "We've always known this would happen."

You shake your head so softly, Bucky can't be sure that it isn't just the warm summer breeze playing tricks on his mind. You hold your head high, but your voice wavers, betraying the regal facade, "Please, don't."

It breaks him. It tears him apart that he's hurt you because he wasn't strong enough to resist falling in love.

He took the most sacred of oaths. He was supposed to protect you.

Mind, body, soul.

Mind, body, soul, and heart.

He broke that. It was his turn to be strong, to walk away so you didn't have to. He tears his own hand away, "I'll let your ladies know you're ready for your evening gown."

"James," you call after him. "James!"

Your only response is the door snapping shut followed by a loud resounding silence. And then, there's just nothing. A nothingness that sweeps over everything, your world becoming a shade of bleak you've never known. 

You stand so still on the balcony, silent tears streaming down your cheek. You hardly notice your ladies entering your room. You don't move from your spot on the balcony, the spot where he left you for the very last time.

One of your ladies taps on your shoulder, she curtsies before you, "Your highness, are you quite alright?"

"I suppose I'm anxious," you halfheartedly chuckle, wiping away the tears. "I don't - I don't truly know what will become of me tonight."

"He's a good man from what I've heard. The servants say that he treats them well, he has a good heart. He will be a good ruler and a good husband."

You look over your shoulder, offering a soft smile, "Thank you."

"We should get you dressed. They'll be expecting you shortly."

You nod, allowing them to slip the off white gown on you. It's a beautiful gown, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't select it specifically for Bucky's eyes.

There was a time not long ago, a time when you were young and naive, full of hopeless love and a head full of fantasies of a triumphant, timeless love, that you would dream together.

Hand in hand, you would lie in your private meadow and dream. Dreams of one day walking down the aisle to Bucky. Dreams of wearing a gown that would take his breath away. Dreams whispered for only him to hear. Dreams carried away in the night.

Going through the motions off getting prepared make your chest feel more hollow than you thought ever possible. If you listen closely, you swear you can hear the summer breeze whistling through the hole torn through your heart.

By the end of the hour, you stare at yourself in the mirror. You look beautiful. And yet, you feel more empty than ever before. 

It feels like a death march, walking from your bedroom chamber to the ballroom. You've never met the man you were promised to before. You don't know anything about him except what your ladies in waiting knew.

You know it wouldn't matter anyway. You could know everything about him. You could know him from head to toe. You could know his heart, his mind, his soul, and he would never compare. He couldn't compete with the man that held your heart.

Your guards trail you behind with one notable absence. Bucky. The head of your security. Your most trusted protector. One of the most senior members of the Royal Guard.

Long before either of you knew civility, you knew him as that bright eyed little boy. Once a little boy wandering the grand halls of the palace, he followed in his father's steps, becoming an invaluable knight. It was somewhere in that time he became your own knight in shining armor.

He held your heart long before he commanded soldiers, long before your father appointed him to your security detail. He was the person you trusted most. Your confidante. The one person who spoke freely to you. 

You walk past the garden. It was always your favorite place in the palace. The place where you first saw those blue eyes. Even at such a young age, your heart knew. He would always be yours.  Even if fate would not allow it, even if destiny tore you apart, your soul would always belong to him. All those nights, sneaking out to the garden. You would be dead if anyone knew. He would be dead if anyone knew. 

You don't even realize you're being presented to your betrothed until your name is bellowed through the ballroom. Gilded from top to bottom, you can the ballroom from the very top of the grand staircase, Bucky is nowhere to be found. 

You walk down the staircase alone. Your heels click against the smooth marble. You hold your head high, face unflinching and stoic. The face of a future queen. The face of a woman that just lost the great love of her life. 

There is nothing remarkable about the man you're to marry. Nothing but the crown resting atop his head - a crown you weren't the least bit interested in. His words sound like a dull buzz in your ear. His eyes flat and dull. Even his kind smile is but a spark to the flame you shared with Bucky. Perhaps, in another life you could learn to love him. It's a lie, you realize. In those other lives, your heart belongs to Bucky too.

You can't do this, you decide in the moment the dinner is finished. You can't promise yourself to another man knowing that you'd lose the love of your life. You could do without the crowns, without the jewels, without any of it, you would give it all away if it meant you could have him. You can't go about your life without Bucky. 

You wait until the cloak of night. And then you go after what you can't live without. 

You stand in his room all alone. He's not here. Nowhere to be found. You curl your hands into fists, determined to wait for him all night. Consequences be damned. You're not but a few moments into your rumination when you hear footsteps in the corridor.

The moment his lantern illuminates the room, he gasps, his hand flinching towards his sword. He sighs, sheathing his sword when he sees it's you. His face is cold and distant as he speaks to you, "You shouldn't be here, your highness."

"I do not love him."

"You will learn to love him," Bucky dryly insists. "We must get you back before-"

"No," you forcefully interject. "I will not. My heart belongs to another. My heart belongs to you."

"We can never be," he speaks through gritted teeth, his trembling hands tightly clenched. "You are the princess. You will one day be queen. I am sworn to protect the crown that will rest on your head. That is our duty."

"Tell me," you softly exhale. "Tell me you do not feel the same."

"I -" He can't bring himself to say the words. 

"Please, so that we may fulfill our duties," you beg. "Tell me."

"You know I cannot."

"Then tell me why you run."

"You know why."

You furiously shake your head, "I do not."

"I cannot give you the life you deserve. Even if I could, your future does not lie with me, a mere commoner. I am but a man sworn to protect you. My place is not and will never be by your side."

You bitterly chuckle, "You truly think so lowly of yourself?"

"No." He shakes his head. His eyes flash over to you, finally his gaze softens, "Perhaps I think of you only in the highest regard, in the highest esteem, far higher than I could ever reach."

"You do not see yourself clearly. You are what I cannot live without. You are what I cannot bear to lose."

Bucky takes your hand, squeezing it tightly, "You love your people. You love this land."

"I love you."

"As I love you..." He cups your face, tenderly stroking your cheek, "There is no other heir. With your mother passed on, what will become of our people if we leave them defenseless and without a ruler?"

"I've read our constitution, there is nothing proclaiming I must marry of royal bloodline."

"Your father would never allow it. I would lose my head for even thinking of such impropriety."

"I am the sole heir. I will be queen."

"Yes."

"I will not allow myself to be torn between my love for my people and my love for you."

"We all have our cross to bear."

"Then let me bear mine. I will speak to my father. I will make him see. I will rule with you at my side or I will rule alone and our bloodline will die with me."

"You cannot -"

"I can."

"Am I truly worth risking the wrath of your father, the wrath of our king?"

"You are worth everything to me." 

You find your father first thing the next morning. He sits surrounded by his advisors, the same advisors that convinced your father to promise you to the neighboring country.

You knew you were not unique in this situation. You were not alone when your heart and duties were pulling you apart at the seams. You knew few loves ever triumphed. Few could overcome such pressure. And even fewer survived with two intact.

You shudder at the thought of Bucky paying the price for falling in love with you. You were both so young when you first saw him. So young and so naive.

Regardless, you stand tall. This was a love worth the fight. A love that would endure. A love that would be timeless.

"Father," you curtsy before him. "I must speak with you at once."

"Leave us." He raises a hand in dismissal. As gentle and benevolent as your father could be, he could also be stern and unflinching in his mind. People don't question your father. People don't question the king. The advisors scurry out of the throne room without another word."Is something troubling you, my dear?"

You nod, swallowing your fear for Bucky's sake. "There is something I must discuss with you."

Wonder burns in your father's eyes. "Go on."

"I am afraid I cannot proceed with the betrothal," you firmly state, your voice as cool and unwavering as steel.

He quirks an eyebrow, his eyes blown wide, "I beg your pardon?"

"I cannot marry him. I do not love him."

"You will learn to love him."

You can't count how many people have told you something similar. Hundreds since your betrothal over a decade ago. Even then, you were hopelessly in love with Bucky. "My heart belongs to another."

"An infatuation is not - "

"It is no infatuation," you explode. "I spent life loving this man. I love him with all my heart. I will not lose him. Allow him to rule beside me when the day arrives."

Your father leans forward, his gaze bearing down on you, "And what of our alliance? Your betrothal? Imagine the scandal!"

"We can ally ourselves without my hand in marriage," you reply, speaking each syllable as calmly and carefully as your most revered diplomats. "Our land is bountiful. Our people are strong."

"You love this gentleman?"

"I do."

"And who, pray tell, is this man?"

You lower your head. This was the part you feared most. Risking the life of the one you love with every fiber of your being. You reminded yourself that there was a plan. One you spent all night constructing. He was waiting on the outskirts of your meadow, if it didn't go well, you'd run away and leave it all behind. For him. "James. James Barnes."

"The head of your personal guard?"

You don't allow your voice to waver. "Yes."

"And what if I had him executed for this treason?"

"This was no treason, Father!" you speak with an intensity that you've never dared to before. Your chest heaves with panic. This was it. The moment where you lost or gained everything. "I have loved him from the moment I saw him when we were children. I would never forgive you. You would lose your sole heir."

"You would forsake your land, your people, for him?"

Without a breath of hesitation, you nod, "Yes."

Your father sucks in a breath. It was unlike you. You were the perfect portrait of an heir. With the death of your mother, people looked to you to see a steady hand and a reasonable mind. He almost forgot that somewhere buried in your sense of responsibility, was a heart that was entirely your own. "I see."

You reach for your father's hand, holding it tightly, "He is a good man. A good man who has devoted his life to the Crown."

"You cannot marry an untitled man."

"Father, please -"

"Let me finish," he stops you. "You cannot marry an untitled man, but I cannot lose my only daughter."

"Thank you, Father." You don't bow to him this time. This time, you rush towards him, throwing your arms around him. "Thank you."

"I loved your mother the way you love him," he whispers for you to hear. "I would have given it all away for her. Everything except you."

Tears well in your eyes. You squeeze his hand one last time. "Thank you."

You don't waste another moment before you run to Bucky. You find him anxiously pacing the meadow, the sunlight making his blue eyes look more brilliant than any flower you've ever seen.

His breath catches the moment he sees you running towards him. Down the cobblestone path he's spent years watching you from. He run towards you, meeting you in the center of the meadow you turned into his haven.

The moment you're close enough to touch, his hands grip your waist. His wild eyes rake over you, "Your highness..."

You throw your arms around him, "I love you."

"Your father?"

You nod into the crook of his neck. "He understands."

He breaths a sigh of relief. And for the first time since your betrothal was announced, he feels hope bloom in his heart. He pulls back, his hand pushing away the stray hair from your face. His chest heaves, his heart overwhelmed with the one dream he never dared to believe would come true. His eyes bore into yours gleaming and twinkling, so inviting you have no choice but to jump in. "Our love will be timeless, I swear it."

And it was.

On the dreaded day your father's long reign ended, and you became the queen you were born to be. He was there, holding your hand, holding you steady, by your side where he belonged.

Yours was a story of triumph, a story of hope, a love story turned into folklore, destined to be passed down from generation to generation.

Your love would last forever. A tale as timeless one could be.

AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Inspired By Taylor Swift Masterlist Bucky Barnes Masterlist

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

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[hischierswhore]

can i get a day off with bf! christian, preferrably with many cuddles!

a day off

pairing: Christian Pulisic x Reader

TW: none

Christian finally had a day off and he wanted to take advantage of it by staying in and spending it with you. No responsibilities, no training, no games. A nice, relaxing day.

He'd taken you out to dinner the night before, just the two of you for a long awaited and much needed date night.

Despite the fact that you both lived together, your schedules always clashed, leaving little to no time for the pair of you to actually be together. But after finding out that Christian finally had a day off, you immediately requested the day off from work to spend it with your boyfriend of 5 years.

"Good morning, princess" You felt Christian wrap his arms around you, causing you to turn to face him.

"Morning, handsome" You smiled at him.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked, resting his chin on top of your head, not really having anything else to do right now except cuddle.

"Mmhmm" You mumbled back as you buried your head in his neck. You both stayed like this for a while.

"Want some breakfast?" He asked, rubbing your back softly.

"Only if there's bacon involved." You joked back causing Christian to laugh.

After a quick kiss, Christian left the bed to go make some food.

"C'mon! I'll help!" You giggled after him, hopping out of bed and running after him.

As soon as you walked into the kitchen, you immediately started smelling something delicious. Christian stood at the stove, making scrambled eggs and some bacon. With a smile on his face, he handed you a plate and sat down on one of the bar stools near the island.

As you put the plate in front of yourself, you saw him looking at you. There was something about him that was different. Maybe it was because he looked so peaceful or maybe it was the way his eyes shone. Whatever it was, you couldn't stop staring at him. You weren't sure what it was but it was interesting enough to distract you from eating.

"Is something wrong? " You said as Christian broke eye contact, focusing on his plate.

"No! It's just... it's been a while since we've done this, huh?" He glanced up at you.

"Yeah, I guess so." You agreed, staring at your own plate a tad bit too long.

You were contentedly eating, not thinking about how similar his expression was to yours when Christian broke your stare, almost apologetically placing his hand on top of yours. It wasn't until that moment did you notice it.

You didn't even have to look at him to know what he was doing. Your hands came to rest on top of his; causing Christian to quickly place his own hand over yours, completely locking you in. You brought your free hand up to cover his other hand, leaning closer towards him.

He made eye contact once again, meeting your gaze as you looked deep into them.

Without saying another word, you leaned forward, closing the distance between your lips. They met and pressed gently against each other, but still held apart by your fingers.

It was so soft. So perfect. You enjoyed every single second. It only lasted seconds, but you were blissfully satisfied with that feeling of pure happiness.

"What did you want to do today?" You asked him.

"Can we just stay home? I've missed you so much, princess" He leaned over and kissed your forehead.

"Of course. Anything you want." You smiled as you hopped off your stool.

"Last one to the room is a rotten egg!" You shouted as you began running to your shared bedroom.

"Cheater! You got a head start!" Christian called from behind you.

Unfortunately for you, Christian was fast. He quickly caught up to you and picked you up right before you entered the room, carrying you to the bed and softly throwing you onto it.

He jumped onto the bed beside you before getting himself cozy under the covers, you doing the same. He pulled you into him, his head now buried into your neck. He wrapped his arms around you tightly, holding you to him, making you feel safe and protected.

Neither of you moved, knowing this is exactly what the other needed. You just needed to be in each others presence. You were happy being in close proximity with him, it was all you could ask for.

His hand reached up and caressed your cheek tenderly.

"Don't move. Let's just stay like this forever" He whispered.

The sounds of crickets outside were loud and comforting. Nothing else existed in this world but the two of you, alone together in this wonderful room. In this beautiful moment. This very moment was all that mattered. All you wanted to do was bask in the beauty of it. The simplicity.

[fruit-salad-ship]

eh heh heh heh some dumb teenage ranger antics, because we've mostly had a "gay experience" that was a turning point.

Ranger days would have some fun little moments, the whole dorms having sleep overs that Peach does everything to avoid. She's the unsocialised creature in the mix, and the other students try hard to get her to come sit in the common room with them and play stupid games. They've nabbed a bottle of something boozy, all of 16 just vibing one friday night as a group. Everyone gets along, everyone execpt Peach, who only left her room to get a drink, leaning down into the fridge to her stash of juice.

When she stands back up, everyones looking at her s shes drinking from a carton mindlessly, notably Plum who'd stayed very quiet, sat quite stiffly opposite where she's standing.

"What?" A short sharp bark, not comfortable with the eyes on her. One student points to the bottle on the floor, one end pointing to her, the other end to Plum. Peach has no clue what this is about, not until several other classmates grab her grinning, laughing, joking around in a harmless way, something she's not comfortable with, extremly outnumbered as shes shoved into a closet. She stumbles, turns to try to get out, but the doorway has her rival being pushed inside too, managing to catch herself as the door is shut behind her, this tiny space feeling all the smaller now.

"What the hell is this? Some dumb teenage hazing or?" Peach wasnt even able to keep her juice, someone took it from her in the chaos. Its just them in this stupid storage closet, too close, plums only JUST taller than her, can feel her somewhere close, both trying to stay as far apart as this tiny space allows for. "Its a game, got seven minutes in this place before they let us out." stated matter of factly, folding her arms defencivley. "Whats the point? Sounds like a waste of time, theres nothing to even do in here, why do you people play this junk?"

How was Plum suppose to explain this? The situation was already awful. First theyre paired up in class, teachers thinking they need more time working together to get past their clear rivalry, encouraging teamwork with the threat of failing them if they didnt learn to function as a coherent unit, and now this. "People usually just mess around in here, you know like, make out and stuff. Go figures you dont have a clue, never spent a day with people your own age I swear." She wasnt too far from the truth, waiting for some witty response, getting nothing. In the dark of the closet she struggled to see the shorter ranger trainee, catching just a hint of expression. "Are you...embarrased?" The teasing tone in her voice prompted Peach to snap back quickly. "No!" A clear yes, feeling Peach reach past her for the handle to the door, trying to get free. Course theyd locked it, there was no give at all in her attempts.

This was all too delicious, normally Peach was collected and calm and if anything angry, not at all nervous. Maybe it was the overly sweet super cheap booze she'd been drinking with the others, or the weird need to chase this power trip, but Plum was kind of intrigued. "It's kind of weird seeing you handle something so badly." She took a strategic step forward, close enough for the pair to feel eachothers heat coming off their skin. Peach backed up, tried at least, only finding the back wall and an uneven footing due to a broom she hadnt noticed, the stick of it whacking her in the arm as she struggled to get away, clumsily pushing it off her, trying to figure out a way free. Why not mess with her a bit? Not like there was usually an opportunity for Plum to have the power between them, so just this once she took it.

There was no was she was getting away, finding the little angry form in the dark, one hand on her cheek, Peach totally froze up, no one had been stupid enough to get this close to her physically, she wanted to push back, to shout or do anything that'd gain her some distance but even in the dark as she raised a hand to do so, plum grabbed her wrist, stopped the attempt, instead pulling her closer.

'stop it, stop- get it together, she's just messing with you!' repeatedly thought, a warm cheek against hers that even stopped her trying to pull her caught hand back. "You've never kissed anyone before have you?" The question was so close, breath on her neck, a subtle teasing undertone. "Thats none of your buisness." Another clear answer disguised thinly under a veil of stubborness, something that made Plum smile to herself. "You can just say 'no' like a normal person you know." The power compelled her to get closer, feeling this athletic little body against hers, the pyjamas so painfully Peach, boyish, tank top and shorts in dark colours, never once spotted in a bright tones, the complete contrast to Plum's cute outfit, pastels and frils, silks, cutesy. They couldnt be more opposite.

"Good luck forgetting who took that first from you then." No hesitation, Plum made sure there was no room for a fight, Peach was already unbalanced where she stood, one arm caught, the other trying to keep herself propped up as she was pushed back against the wall with surprising force. The lips that found hers in the dark were soft and gentle, a weird feeling she's not experienced before, too busy working towards the goals laid out by her family, no time for this kind of messing about. Normal teenager junk, not something she had room for.

God she wished she had more room for it.

By the time the pair left the closet, Plum didnt even see her little team mate, laughing with her friends, turning to see Peach already gone off up the hallway back to her room at speed. The brief peak she took over her shoulder upon turning into her dorm revealed a serious blush, something Plum revelled in, a small, perhaps unfair win.

Was it coincidence that Peach was oddly quiet in class after that? Perhaps, but at least they seemed to argue a little less over the small things. Tension however only grew between them. Plum enjoyed the power, and Peach was suddenly very aware of a new aspect of herself she'd never had the chance to consider.

[onthepyre]

Steve's life is going to fall apart, he thinks.

Dustin's away at summer camp, Nancy's left for college two weeks early. He has a late shift at six, a house to return to that's emptier than usual, and a funeral to attend at eleven sharp tomorrow morning. His mother is writing a eulogy and his father is cold and pale in a box in some back room of the funeral home. He can't get the image out of his head.

At half past five, he shakes himself out of the stupor he's been sitting in. It's been at least twenty minutes since he's last moved, but really, who knows — all he's aware of is his aching back and the sharp pain in his neck from the hunched position he'd assumed at the kitchen table. Steve's car keys have left an imprint on his hand. He'd forgotten he was holding them. The Family Video vest is in his car, tossed haphazardly over the dash, and he shrugs it on over his gray polo before he pulls out of the driveway. Robin's house isn't far, something he's glad for. Less time he has to spend alone. Maybe she won't notice how tired he looks in the quickly dimming light.

She does. It's Robin, after all. Steve can't hide much from her.

"Hey, Stevie," she says as she slides into the passenger seat. Her voice is gentle, the way she might speak to an injured cat. "How are you doing?"

"It’s pretty bad," he tells her, and it feels like he's confessing to a crime. "I didn't get out of bed until, like, two hours ago and I still want to go back to sleep."

"Yeah?" she asks. He can tell she isn't sure what else to say.

"Yeah."

"I'm really sorry. I know that's pretty much the least helpful, most generic thing I could say, but I mean it. I can’t imagine how… how hard it must be."

There's a long pause. Steve starts thinking they're just going to drive in silence for the rest of the time, which is weird, especially for Robin. It makes him want to cry, sort of — that she, of all people, can't find anything to say to him. Inadvertently, he grips the wheel tighter.

"We'll close early," she says finally, timid in a way she usually isn't. "Keith can suck my dick, I don't care. He'll get over it. And we'll go get ice cream, if you want, and then I'll come stay over. If that's alright."

"Yeah," Steve answers, and God, there are tears in his eyes. "That would be great." He's careful not to let his voice catch.

"I'm thinking 8:00 — we'll start shutting down at 7:30 and be out by a quarter past. Then we've got almost an hour until Dairy Queen closes, unless you want to go somewhere else?" Out of the corner of his eye, Steve can see Robin twisting one of the rings on her left hand. Like a gut-punch, he knows it's the shitty tin band, the one he'd gotten out of a quarter machine at the arcade and fake-proposed to her with. She hadn't taken it off since that day.

Steve pulls into the parking lot, and turns to her once he's parked the car. She's still fiddling with the ring, so he reaches over to take her hand.

"Rob, listen," he says. "I'm not gonna fall apart. I'll be okay." He can tell that they both know it isn't true.

"You don't have to be," she tells him, and through slightly blurry vision, Steve can tell she's tearing up, too. "You can fall apart, it's all right. We'll put you back together. I'll be here the whole time."

Steve isn't sure why it's a problem, but he needs to make sure Robin doesn't see him cry. He gets out of the car and turns away. He can hear her, four feet away, doing the same.

———

The shift, short as it is, passes slowly and in relative quiet. Robin feels too far away, but the little bit of stability they've found since getting out of the car is fragile, winding between them like a spiderweb. If Steve reaches out, he'll break it.

They follow her schedule exactly, locking the door behind them at 8:15 — two hours before they're supposed to. Steve isn't one to get worked up about things like this, but he's even less worried than he usually would be. Nobody ever comes in on Thursday nights. The only people that will know are him and Robin.

"So, Dairy Queen?" she asks as she opens the door. "Or do you want to go somewhere else?"

"Dairy Queen is fine," he tells her. Nothing will really make him feel better, he thinks, but ice cream can't hurt.

The drive isn't long, but it feels like it. Steve can hardly stand whatever version of Robin this is, the one that's treating him like he's about to crumble at any second. She's right, but that's part of the reason it's getting to him so much. If the silence was unfounded, it wouldn't hurt so bad.

She insists on paying, and Steve almost can't stomach the sweetness of the Oreos. Robin gets M&Ms so he can pick at hers, too.

"So, how's band been going?" Steve asks, just to break the quiet.

Robin tilts her head a little. There's pity in her eyes.

"Pretty good," she says slowly. "The directors always get super uptight around concert season, so that's starting to kick in. We just got our last piece. It's this stupid hard classical thing — Stravinsky, I think — fuckin' Russians. It would be awesome, though, if we could play it right."

This is the Robin he knows. Fuckin' Russians, he thinks. It makes him smile.

"That's great. What's it about?"

"Oh, I have no idea," Robin says with a grin. "It’s from the Firebird, and it has something to do with hell, and it's impossible to play."

"I'll have to come to the concert." Steve holds her eye for a second, but when it goes on too long and her smile shifts to an expression of sympathy, he turns his gaze down into his blizzard.

"Steve…" she starts, but she leaves it there, reaching across the table.

"Can we go?" He squeezes her hand and she does the same.

"Yeah, of course. Come on, we can go straight to sleep if you want."

They do — or they try to. As soon as they're home and settled, Robin in a pair of shorts she'd left there and one of Steve's old shirts, Steve much the same, they spread out blankets on the floor of his room and try to sleep. Robin's presence is a comfort, but not enough for Steve to get the coffin out of his head.

"Can you talk?" Steve asks, rolling over in his bed to face her in the dark. "About anything you want, I don't care. Just say something. Ramble."

She reaches up to put a hand on the bed, and he places his on top.

"I love you," Robin begins. "The other day, I learned that a quarter of the world's population has tuberculosis. Well, not has, like they're sick with it, but they have the bacteria in them. That's insane. Tuberculosis is up there with rabies for me, you know? There's a new outbreak of it that's resistant to the treatments, and I know it's not likely we'd get it here in Hawkins, but man, it would suck so much. Especially if it was one of those drug resistant strains. We'd end up sad little waifs like in the Victorian era and we'd die a slow death and there would be nothing they could do."

"I love you," Steve responds. "Can you come up here, Rob?"

"Yeah, for sure."

Robin stands up and climbs into bed next to him. He can make out the shape of her, squinting at him. Neither moves for a moment.

"How are you holding up?" she asks.

Only then, in the darkness, does Steve let himself fall apart.

It comes on slowly, but he knows it's coming as soon as she asks. He can't speak around the lump in his throat, so he just sits there fighting tears until she reaches out and pulls him into her chest. He breaks then. He sobs in Robin's arms for a while as she rubs his back and whispers reassurances to him. He feels like a little kid.

"Sorry," he gets out as it starts to die down.

"Shh." She buries her face in his hair. "Don't. It's alright. I'm not going anywhere, Stevie. This is what I'm here for."

Steve is hit with another wave of tears, this time a mixture of grief and gratitude. Robin, true to her word, stays. She holds him tighter still as he clutches her like she's the only thing keeping him tethered.

"I love you," she says under her breath. "I love you. It's alright. I'm here. I love you. I've got you. I love you."

She keeps going like that endlessly, quietly, into the top of Steve's head. Only when the sobs have slowed to sniffles does Robin stop, and even then, she keeps running her hands across his back, occasionally punctuated by a kiss pressed to his hair. There, cradled like a toddler against her chest, Steve starts to put himself back together. They fall asleep like that, intertwined, at home.

[fiorella-a]

Karasuno boys as... "Vampire" song lyrics!

(+ Short scenarios)

Info:

-future! Karasuno boys x gn! Reader

-No Tanaka, he's married after all 🤷🏻‍♀️

-toxic relationship

-cursing

-slight angst (i guess)

Daichi:

"I loved you truly

Gotta laugh at the stupidity"

"I should've known it was strange

You only come out at night"

>> You always found it weird that Daichi would go out around midnight or almost midnight, I'm talking about 10, 11 or 12PM and then come back an hour and a half later. God you hate yourself for falling into his trap when he assures you saying, "It's required for me to patrol around the area" or "you know I'm a police officer, babe" and due to your sincere love for him, you always did understand his responsibilities.

Although you can't help but notice that every time he comes back, he smells and looks.. fresh? Like he had just taken a shower and re-used his clothes.

Maybe he did take a shower with a girl he was giving an after care for. Maybe he was patrolling the area of his girl's apartment. But you can't do anything, you don't have enough evidence.

Sugawara:

"Cause I've made some real big mistakes

But you make the worst one look fine"

"You're so convincing

How do you lie without flinching?"

>> Sugawara gave you an extra key to his class just in case he locks the door and you wanted to visit him. Your relative, who goes to the school that he teaches, called you and told you how amazing his day was, you found it weird that Sugawara isn't home yet. "That's awesome, buddy! But I gotta go, alright? I'll call later on, bye-bye!"

Once you hung up, you drove as fast as you can to the school and came into his classroom without warning.

You saw a woman sitting on Suga's desk, while he has his right arm wrapped around her waist. The woman could only eye you up and down before turning to yell at Suga, "I thought you told them? Gosh Suga! We've been over this for what? A thousand time?!" The said woman jumped out of his grasp, pushed you aside and walked out while slamming the door behind her.

He scoffs at you before opening the door and chasing after the woman.

He left you, huh? Of course he did.

Asahi:

"Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire"

>> Being an apparel designer and someone who used to get nervous all the time, Asahi gets insecure about the things that he has or had created. He always yearns for your compliment and your opinion both for him and his designs.

And God did it drain you, always saying "you did a great job today, pretty boy" "look at this! One thing missing and after that, it'll be all perfect!" You acted more like his worker rather than his partner, to be honest.

Nishinoya:

"Ooh, what a mesmerizing, paralyzing, fucked-up little thrill

Can't figure out just how you do it, and God knows I never will"

>> Nishinoya takes you with him every time he goes travelling, he winks at you before saying, "It's my treat, love"

After a long day, you both headed onto a nearby hotel before resuming your adventures for tomorrow. The room was spacious, the balcony had the best view and you were busy day dreaming while Noya went into the hotel lobby to fetch you both some food and when he came back, he surprised you with your favorite meal!

You're so easy to distract that you missed the kiss mark on his temple and his neck.

Kageyama:

"The way you sold me for parts

As you sunk your teeth into me, oh

Bloodsucker, famefucker

Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire"

>> Kageyama kept your relationship very lowkey, he didn't wanna make you overwhelmed by the amount of fans and paparazzi that's on his back, but his team does know you.

When Kageyama is fast asleep, you grab his phone and tries to find one of his teammate's number and luckily, you did!

2:09 AM:

"Hi! Kageyama's girlfriend here, I got your number off of his phone. Can you please help me set up a party for him? Thank you and it's no biggie if you decline."

5:31 AM

"Hey, you have a different number? Gosh [random name] you didn't tell me sooner."

"I'm sorry you must've misunderstood, It's actually Y/n!"

"Oh, Y/n? Aren't you his one night stand? Please stop messaging me, i'm uncomfortable knowing Tobio has a girlfriend and you're trying to earn his attention. Thank you for the efforts of reaching out for me."

He kept you a secret because all they know is you were nothing but a fling to him.

Hinata:

"How's the castle built off people you pretend to care about?"

>> When Hinata got home from practice, he could tell that you were tired and he asked about your day, "Nothing much, just stressful customers always making a scene, you know?" You laugh at your words while Hinata looked into your eyes, "That's sad." He coughs "anyways my day was more stressful than yours, I–"

You spaced out while his rambling started.

Did he even put himself into your shoes?

Tsukishima:

"I used to think I was smart

But you made me look so naive"

"And every girl I ever talked to told me you were bad, bad news

You called them crazy, God, I hate the way I called them crazy too"

>> Tsukishima has you wrapped around his fingers and he knows it. He made you so dependent on him that he knows you can't even go on a day without telling him stories. Gosh he loves the way you're so easy to manipulate! you could've lent in some time for the girls to explain themselves but no, you took his words.

What a fool.

Yamaguchi:

"Went for me, and not her

'Cause girls your age know better"

>> Yamaguchi likes someone from his class, but when you confessed to him, he can't help but accept it out of pity. And Yamaguchi successfully shaped you into his crush. Making you trim your hair, dress in a different aesthetic and even changing the way you talk, just for him. And gosh when you saw the way he looked at the person he liked, you noticed something similar about them.

Everything. You're like that person's mirror.

[ladyvictory22]

(Fall into Temptation) III: Jealousy

Like adulterers in the forbidden garden, their souls slither among the buds of temptation. Jealousy, like venomous snakes, coils around their love, whispering sins on every fallen leaf. Can they redeem themselves in the aridity of their own Eden, or are they destined to be eternal exiles from celestial peace?

In their little bubble, they had created a small domestic life that they enjoyed. Their weekend meetings were not just for pleasure; even if the moment was right or they truly desired it, they would yield to their desires. Other times, they simply slept, talked, cuddled – a moment used solely to forget the reality they lived in and enter their own world. It was like... feeling as if they had been together for many years, at least that's how they felt.

One thing Toto had noticed in their domestic bubble was Christian's ease in falling asleep, especially on him. He knew that Christian relaxed enough, and sometimes in the middle of a conversation, the younger one would slowly drift into sleep. On other occasions, Toto would run his hand down Christian's neck, applying pressure at certain points where Christian quickly relaxed.

They were in that position now. Christian slept or tried to sleep on him, in Toto's room in the hotel where Mercedes was staying. In the last two races, they couldn't be together, especially during Christian's birthday week because... their wives would be there.

So, both of them had silently clung to each other. They were going to be separated for a long time, especially after the season ends; the winter break was another matter they had been avoiding, but that time was looming over them.

To ran his hand on Christian's back, gently moving up and down when he felt the younger one stir. He got up gently with slightly tired eyes. He had spent the last half-hour trying to sleep, but thoughts were bothering him.

"What's wrong?" Toto asked.

Christian looked at him and sighed. "Nothing."

"Am I doing something wrong?" Toto asked, sounding concerned.

"No... it's just that... I can't sleep," he said softly.

"Then I'm doing something wrong," Toto said, running a hand through his hair.

"It's not that... it's just that I'm thinking about... the winter break approaching," he said, avoiding Toto's gaze.

Toto smiled gently. "Chris..." he approached and kissed his cheek. "We'll figure this out, don't worry."

"But we haven't talked about this. We've been apart for a week... but three months?" Christian said.

"We'll figure it out. Maybe we can find some time outside of our business commitments," Toto suggested.

That was another pending topic of conversation. In all the months they had been in this affair, they hadn't seen each other outside of their work moments. Christian was afraid of doing something like that, afraid of being discovered. So, he stayed silent because, in the end, it seemed like the only solution.

"Christian, that's another issue we've been avoiding, and you know it," Toto emphasized. "We'll be careful, maybe once a month."

Although they knew that once wasn't enough, even if they managed to escape for a whole day, it wouldn't be sufficient. They barely tried to get enough with the times they saw each other during the Grand Prix weekends.

"It's the only solution, I suppose," Christian whispered.

"Yes, but we'll discuss it later. Look at your eyes," Toto said sweetly. "You look tired, darling."

"I am," said Christian, trying not to blush.

They had recently started using affectionate terms between them, occasionally. They were afraid of getting used to it, but when Toto spoke to him that way, Christian melted.

They looked at each other, smiled, and Toto leaned in to unite their lips, the sound of a sweet kiss resonating in the room.

"Come on, let's go to sleep," Toto said.

They settled in more comfortably. They had left the room dimly lit, but they turned off the lights entirely, and darkness enveloped them.

Not long after, they were asleep, in the same position, Christian on top of Toto, hiding his face in his neck.

~~

There are many topics they are avoiding, gradually accumulating in a to-do list that they don't want to touch.

Lately, both have been experiencing conflicting emotions. Christian becomes desperate at the thought of being away from Toto for too long. It's not because he can't be away from him for an extended period, but rather, it's about who Toto will be with during those days.

Christian reproaches himself for those thoughts and discomfort, not wanting to have them, not wanting to be possessive with Toto.

Because... until they decide what step to take, exclusivity is forbidden. Christian has fantasized a lot about the "what if." In his mind, he has created different scenarios, knowing each other when they were teenagers or when Christian was just starting in TP, and he always asks himself, "Why didn't fate bring us together earlier? Why do we have to live through this?"

Toto, on his part, has noticed the same sensations, well, since that time when they were distant and Toto felt so possessive, and he still feels that way. He knows he can't mark Christian the way he wants. He lets Christian do it, lets him scratch his back as much as he wants, mark him if he wants. If only he could do everything he wants—bite him, leave hickeys.

But Toto controls his strength and knows it would be unleashed if he did it once, although something deep down can tell him that it might happen soon.

~~

Jealousy at the beginning is sweet, playful games that end in a pleasant and flirtatious outcome.

The first time it happened, Toto sensed a different scent on Christian, and he knew perfectly well that it was the scent of a woman. Christian's wife had been accompanying him a few days before to celebrate the upcoming Grand Prix, but she had to leave due to some commitments, so the weekend plans had changed for both of them.

Christian was so excited that after dropping his wife off at the car that would take her to the airport, he went straight to the hotel where Toto was staying. He bit his lower lip with a smile, hadn't told Toto yet, and wanted to surprise him. They had made plans to spend time together before his wife decided to join him, so they had exchanged room numbers, as they always did, just in case they had the opportunity.

When Toto opened the door to his room, Christian smiled at him with excitement.

"There's been a change of plans," he said, smiling.

Toto sighed, sounding relieved, and smiled faintly.

Then Christian entered the room and pounced on Toto, hugging him tightly. When Toto wanted to bury his face in his neck, he felt that scent, inhaling the perfume that was subtly perceptible, a trace of jasmine and sandalwood, like an echo of her presence.

And then, jealousy took over his feelings as he inhaled that perfume that didn't bear his name. The mix of emotions enveloped him, the reminder that Christian is not entirely his invaded him.

Toto stepped back, and Christian looked at him with confusion.

"What's wrong?" Christian said. "Aren't you happy that I'm here?"

"Where were you before coming here?" Toto asked.

Christian was surprised by the question. "I escorted her to the car to go to the airport and then came straight here," he replied.

Toto clenched his teeth, imagining a sweet farewell, and his mind began to reach its limit.

"What's happening?" Christian insisted, noticing Toto's gaze.

"Her scent..." Toto whispered. "I can smell her perfume on you."

Christian smiled, noticing how much Toto was controlling himself. Getting jealous over just a scent would feel silly, but it's Toto, and he continues to surprise Christian, and above all, he loves it.

Christian placed a hand on Toto's abdomen, using his thumb to circle gently. They locked eyes.

Then Christian separated from him and lowered Toto's gaze, searching through his belongings. He found his perfume, and when he returned, he took Toto's hand, sat him on the bed, and then settled in his lap, placing his perfume in his hand.

"Drench me in your scent then," Christian challenged. "Remove that scent from me."

There were many moments when Christian let himself go and stopped thinking for a moment; those were the moments where Toto, and only Toto, existed in his mind.

So there he was in Toto's lap, captivated by the man's jealousy and with a strong desire for him to claim what is his, and Toto doesn't lag behind.

With delicacy, he let the aromatic drops caress his wrists. With movements full of tenderness and connected gazes, Toto slid his hands over Christian's skin, ran his fingers, and made small circles.

Christian sighed at the touch, stretched his head, exposing his neck more. Shortly after, Toto approached, and with his eyes closed, he inhaled the scent. The other perfume had disappeared; now, Christian once again had his mark, his scent, stating that he belongs to him.

There's nothing Christian likes more than seeing Toto so hungry, his eyes turning dark, like a wolf about to catch its prey, and Christian is offering himself on a silver platter.

Christian let out a small laugh and caressed Toto's face. "I already smell like you, don't I?"

Toto just nodded, and when he tried to get closer to capture Christian's lips, he was stopped as Christian covered the Austrian's mouth.

"Jealous," he whispered, smiling, and then moved his hand away.

"So are you," Toto replied.

"Maybe, but I'm not so possessive," Christian said, his hands now on Toto's abdomen, starting to unbutton each button.

"You like it when I am," he said, sighing as he felt Christian's hands move up and down his body.

The shirt descended, revealing his back and abdomen.

"I do like it, yes," Christian affirmed, and this time, he joined his lips with Toto's.

A slow but intense kiss, tongues playing with each other, a small bite on a lip. Christian began a trail of kisses along Toto's neck, gently biting his collarbone, descending down his chest. Toto's breathing became heavy, enjoying the lips marking his skin.

Christian's hands traveled to Toto's belt and slowly unfastened it. Then he stood up from the bed and slid to the floor, kneeling in front of Toto.

In his years as a Team Principal, not even as rivals for a decade, Christian would have imagined being on his knees in front of him, looking up at him larger than life, and him returning the gaze with hunger and surprise.

Christian just smiled and winked, knowing that Toto wants him, and he's there to give it to him. He could already feel it half-hard between his pants; the visual image delighted him. How much Toto would give to have Christian like this every day if he could.

Christian started with gentle licks, working his way to the base, keeping his mouth there for a while. Toto's body felt electricity for a moment; he threw his head back in a sigh. And Christian continued his work, moving up and down slowly. Toto's hand traveled to the other's head, stroking his hair as his breathing became labored. They were just starting with everything they wanted to do, and they knew it was going to be a long time.

Jealousy at the beginning tends to be playful, showing desire and possession as a display of affection, indicating that they only want each other in their bubble, not allowing anyone else to enter.

They demonstrated it by increasing their flirtation, discussing it superficially because, for the time being, they could control it, diverting their thoughts for a while.

And yet, they didn't know how long it would last.

Later, when both were satisfied, they lay on the bed facing down. Christian had his hand in Toto's wet hair, his fingers playing among the strands, while Toto had his hand on the other's mouth, his thumb slowly caressing the reddish lip.

"Satisfied?" Christian whispered with a smile.

"With you, I'm never satisfied; I always want more, darling," Toto replied.

"I'm glad to hear that; I feel the same way," he leaned in for one last kiss, amid soft smiles and looks of longing.

~~

As long as it was like this, both would be comfortable with the situation. However, disagreements wouldn't take long to arise, one of the reasons why Christian was nervous about the winter break. He remembered what happened during the summer break just a few months ago.

The inevitable moment when jealousy intensifies began to approach.

They could say they had mentally prepared themselves to be apart from each other for a long time, and Christian believed he could endure it. They had scheduled a day to call and talk, to hear each other's voices.

They had exchanged messages, yes, but due to their commitments, they couldn't do it frequently.

Anxiety became frequent. Christian could suddenly be nervous with just one thought crossing his mind, wanting to know what Toto was doing, and more importantly... with whom. It was corrupting him.

So, the eagerly awaited day for their call had arrived. Christian had decided to lock himself in his office for more privacy. To distract himself, he had started to get ahead on work for when they returned to the factory.

Half an hour passed, an hour... no call, no message. Anxiety returned, a fleeting thought of calling crossed his mind. Maybe Toto was waiting for his call?

He hesitated a bit, unsure. Who knows what he could be doing... he could send a message, but no, it had to be a call.

Christian made up his mind, called. The phone rang once, twice, three times... nothing. It was nighttime, and Christian's thoughts couldn't help but delve into what Toto might be doing. When he checked his social media, the icing on the cake was seeing her recent posts, uploaded just a few hours ago. He felt sick for a moment, a shiver ran through his body, and he felt a knot.

Then he remembered he couldn't get angry like that. They didn't have the right to claim who they touched when they weren't together. In reality, at least for Christian, he had stopped touching that person for a while. And when he did, he couldn't help but feel strange, as if what he was doing wasn't right, when it should be the other way around.

His head hurt, amid so many thoughts and his struggle to push them away. He closed his eyes and let the tears flow.

Days later, the call came. He was in his living room, trying to watch TV when the phone rang. His wife asked who it was, and he quickly lied about something work-related. When he went to his office, he placed the phone on the table and let it ring, not answering.

Another call, no response. Christian didn't know how long he could endure without answering, just staring at his name on the screen.

He felt a lump in his throat. He had tried to dispel his anxiety for days but hadn't been able to.

One last call, and this time, he decided to answer, but probably not in the way Toto expected to hear his voice.

"What do you think you're doing? I'm with my family now," he said, trying to sound upset.

"Excuse me, but I owed you a call... I just wanted..."

"No, don't say anything. You were probably too busy to give me time," he said, and it sounded like a complaint.

"Let me explain..."

"You don't have to explain anything. We had a day, that day has passed, and now you come and talk to me when I'm busy."

"But you answered, so we could talk as we agreed."

"I don't feel like talking, and respect my time because I respected what we had said," he continued. "But who knows what you were doing."

"What are you implying?" Toto asked, sounding annoyed on the other end. "Do you think I didn't respond because I was doing something else?"

"Who knows what you can do one night with..."

"Christian..." Toto said.

"I don't know. I'm not going to blame you for anything, but again, respect my time," Christian said.

"Darling, it's not what you think."

"Whatever," he said and hung up.

He felt a stab in his heart, feeling bad because he didn't feel entitled. Toto wasn't entirely his, and Christian wasn't entirely Toto's.

But Christian felt like he was giving himself completely. He hadn't noticed when the tears were flowing down his cheeks. He left his phone on the desk and listened to it ring, another call, and Christian focused on looking at the sky.

With the sound of a call and then a few messages, he looked at the sky through the window, asking the sky why it was so hard to love someone.

Stormy days followed. Christian immersed himself again in not eating or eating very little. Thoughts were tormenting him, and he slept more than he could.

He felt unstable, unable to believe how difficult it was to be in love—a torture when you're in a prison, unable to touch or have the precious freedom in your hands.

On the other hand, Toto hadn't called back, and that only killed him even more. Although he told himself that he was stupid to think that Toto would talk to him all the time.

They had argued—or well, there had been complaints about Christian's jealousy, and Toto knew how Christian reacted when he let his thoughts take over. That worried him. It was something Christian dealt with—what's right and what's wrong. Toto had decided to give him his time, fearing that the younger one would feel bad.

It's not that Toto thinks it's right to be jealous, but he understands Christian. He, too, has had torturous days this summer, trying to get it out of his mind that the person he wants is not with him.

If only Christian knew the days Toto had dedicated to him, looking at the moon, wishing that he could be the one by his side.

The race that marked the return from the summer break was in Austria, a bittersweet cocktail for Christian. He was angry with that tall man, like a tree, and, on top of that, the return race was Red Bull's home race, but also that man's home race.

It was inevitable that he would seek him out in the paddock, because that's what he did.

There were a few knocks on the door of his office in the motorhome, until he let him in.

"Hello..." he said cautiously.

"Hello," Christian replied, trying not to look at him, focusing on his documents.

There was a moment of silence until Toto decided to break it.

"So, are you going to ignore me, or can we talk?" he said, trying to be patient.

Christian sighed, closed his eyes, and with another sigh, he looked at Toto.

"What do you need?" he said softly but with a very serious look.

"To talk, that's what I need, but not with the team principal. Please, just give me Christian for a moment," he demanded.

"I'm here, can't you see me?"

"I see you, but you have the same behavior when you get angry in a press conference and don't want to see anyone."

"Toto, enough. I have a lot to do; it's Red Bull's home race..." he said sounding exhausted, and he was. The last week before this weekend had been torturous. He knew this moment would come, and Christian sank into anxiety.

"Have you even slept? Have you eaten?" Toto asked.

"You're not interested in that," he said defensively.

"I'm interested, I'm as interested as the day I couldn't call you"

"We've closed this topic. Leave it there."

"Christian..."

"Seriously, Toto, just leave it there," he said decisively, getting up to look for other papers, not wanting to see him.

He couldn't believe that even when Toto had come to find him, his jealousy was still there. Mentally, he cursed himself because he didn't insist on calling him, but there he was, the bastard was there, claiming that he was being ignored, when he had been doing who knows what during the other days of the summer.

Toto sighed, and he didn't care about anything else. He approached Christian and took him by the arm.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Christian said, annoyed, trying to break free.

Toto put his hand on Christian's neck to hold him and brought their lips together.

"Toto!" Christian resisted the other's lips.

He didn't say anything and sought his lips again, pressing them, and Christian tried to resist the kiss, feeling Toto's tongue trying to enter his mouth. But he didn't resist for long until the longing and the repressed desire to feel those lips for a long time invaded him.

When they separated with a thin line of saliva connecting them, breathless from the lack of air, Christian's eyes moistened. He wanted to stand firm against his complaint, but he couldn't anymore.

"I missed you," Toto whispered.

Christian looked away, trying not to cry. Toto hid his face in his neck. "I didn't call you that day because I had an impromptu dinner with some friends. I was trying to distance myself when I saw your call, but it wasn't allowed. Then, my son approached, and he wanted to spend time with me."

Christian opened his eyes in surprise and pulled away. Toto continued.

"I wasn't doing anything, I promise," Toto said, pressing his forehead against Christian's.

"You don't have to say that," Christian said with a slightly choked voice. "I was wrong... I..."

"Stop... don't torment yourself," Toto silenced him. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry," said Christian.

"I'm sorry," Toto said, looking gently at Christian, and shortly after, they kissed again and embraced.

"I missed you..." Christian finally said.

---

They knew it was difficult not to have these jealousies with the nature of their relationship. They had been apart for a long time, but over time, they started talking about things. They tried to be honest, and Toto made sure that Christian didn't stay silent because he had started doing that.

In these two weeks when they would be separated due to the presence of their wives, Toto had struggled with the fact that Christian would be accompanied. In his mind, he could have organized a nice dinner on a quiet night, but they couldn't.

In that case, he prepared a gift, an elegant box lined with velvet, containing the treasure that Toto had carefully selected for Christian. The box, adorned with silver details (a subtle sign of the giver) and a gracefully twirled red silk ribbon, was a prelude to the jewel that awaited inside.

As he uncovered it, the light revealed a meticulously designed watch, whose pulsating beat marked the time. The dial, adorned with a design reminiscent of the curves of a race track, shone with timeless elegance.

However, the truly exceptional part lay on the back of the watch. There, engraved with surgical precision, was the dual declaration that encapsulated the complexity of their connection: "I Hate You and I Love You." The finely crafted letters stood out in contrast, like the paradoxes that wove the very fabric of their relationship.

The watch, more than a simple measure of time, stood as a silent witness to their intertwined emotions.

Christian was delighted; he smiled like a fool throughout the rest of the day. As he adjusted the strap around Christian's wrist, the watch became a tangible symbol of their unique connection. When he saw Toto walking in the paddock before the free practices, he gave a subtle wink accompanied by a smile.

For the moment, everything was going well. Even Christian felt that he was handling it better than it seemed. The watch had been something he had loved. Now, he had to think about giving something special to Toto since his birthday was also approaching.

Christian doesn't know how, but on Toto's birthday, he managed to slip away, and when he saw Toto approaching his motorhome, he first made sure the man was alone, then ran behind him and hugged him.

Toto let out a laugh.

"You said we couldn't see each other," Toto said, smiling as he glanced at the watch Christian was wearing.

"I had to thank you for the gift," said Christian, letting Toto turn around.

"Maybe we can't do anything more special, but I wanted you to know that I always think of you," he said, taking Toto by the waist.

And then they merged into a kiss, the only one they could share for this time, or so they thought until they ended up cuddled inside the motorhome. They knew they were taking a risk, but they wanted to be like that, alone for a while.

So, in their Garden of Eden, everything seemed calm. It felt like it was always spring, even though it turned to fall for a while, it always returned to spring.

However, the fear that winter might come still persisted—a winter that would last for a few months. Christian feared letting himself be carried away by his thoughts again.

Fear can take over when a love of shadows is in the air, when you fear that anything could break your idyll, when you fear that everything could be uncovered.

The inevitable winter break arrived, along with a series of events that Christian feared.

A couple of weeks had passed, things were generally going well; they talked from time to time, and if there were any complaints, they resolved them.

But some events were approaching, along with encounters that would be difficult to digest. Christian was going to be awarded for his career in motorsports, a gala would take place, and Toto would be present.

This time, he would accompany his wife, as she would present awards. You never really know how fate works in others.

But fate decided that Toto would be sitting at the table in front, and Christian at the back, right in his line of sight. Torturous, Christian closed his eyes and inhaled, trying to calm down. His wife was by his side, proud of the award Christian would receive, taking photos and enthusiastically talking about the topic.

But Christian couldn't play along; he felt that at any moment, he would be told to shut up, and not in a nice way. His self-control and patience were being put to the test. Why today? Precisely today?

He took it as a divine sign—enjoying the sin but at the same time, remembering the reality. Christian looked at his watch, the watch Toto had given him, and he felt... bad.

Not even a watch could make him feel special because he remembered that on his hand was a ring that didn't connect him to Toto, but to someone else. The person who wore the ring that committed her was right in his line of sight.

Talking to him, smiling with him, and Christian just watched, becoming more anxious. Sometimes he wanted to connect his gaze with hers.

"Turn around," he thought, "look for me," although he regretted it shortly after.

On the other hand, Toto knew that this could be a problem. He wanted to look for Christian, but when he wanted to turn around, he saw Christian talking to his wife.

So Toto decided not to look, he already felt uncomfortable, and this would only make it worse. So there they were, both knowing they were close but divided by a barrier of reality.

This is how it felt to be outside their garden, outside their bubble, the reality check of having to pretend they have cordiality and that their relationship is only professional.

Toto went on stage to present the new award category, his wife by his side, and Christian couldn't stand to look at it.

Complicit glances, smiles, everything was overwhelming for him. He felt so displaced that he thought he would cry at any moment.

Then he stood up, headed to the bathroom, and it was empty. He stopped at the sink, feeling his hands trembling, the vivid memory of what he had just seen while Toto was on stage hurt, it was a thorn in his side.

He closed his eyes, counted to 10, tried deep breaths, and didn't calm down.

He wanted to hold back the tears; he shouldn't cry. They haven't given him his award, and he can't go up looking upset to receive it.

But he couldn't, not when everything he had seen that night crossed his mind again.

"Why can't it be different?" he whispered in tears. "Why can't it be us?"

Many things crossed his mind—fantasies of being the one with Toto, of showing off his partner at the gala. All the things he wanted to do outside their bubble. But the thoughts turned darker the more he pondered.

"No, you don't deserve happiness," a thought whispered. "That's what you're going to destroy," it reproached.

Christian closed his eyes, trying to silence his mind.

"What if you surrendered, but he didn't?" the thought whispered again. "This is the consequence not only of your sin but also of how you treated him in the past," the thought continued. "Have you already forgotten what you said years ago in Qatar?"

And Christian couldn't take it anymore. In his tears, he whispered, "I apologized... I apologized to him."

What if this was the consequence of being a sinner? The constant reminder of what you can't have even if you want it.

The memory that you can only have it in privacy, in the darkness of a room, in the sheets, but all in secret, without anyone knowing.

He splashed water on his face, took a deep breath, and despite the thoughts, he returned. When he sat back at the table, his wife asked him what was wrong. He quickly denied that something was happening and focused on his phone.

At the other table, Toto had already come down from the stage, and for a moment, he allowed himself to look at Christian. He was looking at his phone, and Toto could see he was wearing the watch.

He smiled softly, at least he was wearing something of his, but that smile changed when he saw Christian talking to his wife, and she was touching his arm... placing her hand on his watch.

Toto didn't like that; his expression turned darker.

"Take your hand off there," he thought.

However, everything escalated when the woman's hand moved up to Christian's face. Toto decided not to look anymore and not to turn again for the rest of the night.

When Christian received his award, he felt the tension passing by that table; he knew Toto would see him, follow his steps, but with what little was left of his professional demeanor, he decided to ignore the presence of the other for his own good.

In his eyes, a distant weariness could be seen, the eyes of a person who has just cried—Toto was one of those people. He noticed Christian's gaze.

Later that night, during the ongoing reception, Toto managed to take him by the arm and lead him to a secluded place.

"Are you okay?" Toto said. "You didn't look well during the speech."

"I am," said Christian, but he felt... distant. "Don't worry; I'm just very tired."

"Have you rested?" Toto asked. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, I am," he said again. "Excuse me; I have to go back. We can't be like this for too long, remember?" He said and walked away.

Toto felt the distance; he saw him moving away and getting lost among the people, leaving him with words on his lips.

The distance would persist for the following events—the premiere of a movie, both invited, both attending with their wives. Christian recognized him, as always, one of the tallest people in the room. Of course, he felt a pang when he saw them, holding hands, smiling at others.

And the questions returned, "Why? Why didn't we meet earlier? What if it were us?"

The worst part is when, in front of you, that person is looking at their official partner, the one everyone knows as their partner, looking affectionately at each other, and you feel like the world is crumbling around you.

Then doubt emerges, guilt appears—should we really continue with what we have?

The night goes on; Christian is the one in the spotlight now, and that gives him a glimmer of relief. At least he feels like he could enjoy the movie.

The garden is now in winter, feeling the distance between them, spring has yet to appear, and it feels like it doesn't want to peek out.

Toto, who is a few seats away, sees him and imagines being there by his side. Maybe they could hold hands since they are in the dark, he thinks.

His wife snaps him out of his trance when she talks to him about something related to the movie. When he turns back, Christian has his wife on his shoulder again, and he thinks about the perfume... the damned perfume.

For some reason, Christian feels strange in that gesture, in the way he's positioned with her—it's the way he is sometimes with Toto. Still, he senses Toto's gaze on him and feels nervous.

This time, he doesn't feel the jealousy to be playful; it feels more bitter, more distant, more... like winter.

Christian doesn't know, but suddenly his wife commented on something, he smiled, and she playfully kissed him on the cheek, although she later pointed out that she had stained him with lipstick.

Dazed and feeling strangely embarrassed, he got up and went to the bathroom to clean up.

Toto, who was at a distance, witnessed everything. It seemed like time froze at that moment, and a knot formed in his throat.

It seemed like destiny wanted them to reflect on what they're doing, on what they have to decide until this progresses further.

When he saw Christian come out, he waited for a moment before coming out as well. He found Christian in the bathroom, cleaning up.

"Hello..." Christian said when he saw him in the mirror.

"Hello," said Toto.

Toto approached and noticed that Christian had wet towels there; he took one and wiped the other's cheek, running the towel over his beard until there was no trace of that lipstick. If you ask, yes, he felt the perfume, but he cared more about removing that stain. Christian just looked on, and when Toto finished, they stared at each other for a while.

And to finish it off, Toto took his face and kissed him. Christian was getting carried away, but he remembered where they were, so he pulled away.

"We... we could be seen," he whispered.

Toto nodded but, when Christian turned to grab the small pack of wet towels, he hugged him from behind.

"Toto," he warned.

"Look at us," Toto said, and with his face, he directed Christian's gaze to the mirror.

And they looked at each other, like a postcard, like a couple's photo. Toto rested his chin on the shorter one's shoulder and winked; Christian smiled gently.

"We look good, don't we?" Toto said.

"Yes," said Christian, smiling at the image reflected in the mirror.

"These days are torturous, believe me," he whispered. "I want to see you, have you all to myself for a whole day."

"I... I don't know... you know it scares me," Christian responded.

"Just think about it, a getaway just for us, without work in the middle," he said, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Tell me you'll think about it and let me know."

"Alright," Christian conceded.

And another kiss emerged as a farewell – a slow, tender kiss accompanied by looks of longing.

Both exited the bathroom at different times.

Christian thought about it for a few days and decided that maybe it would be a good idea. Wouldn't it be? Meeting to dissipate the anxiety that afflicted them and spending some days together.

The idea was discarded when an article was published accusing Toto and his wife of a conflict of interest in their work. There was a great uproar on the internet; everyone was talking about it.

Christian called Toto.

"Is everything okay?" he asked.

"In theory, yes, but... well, there are people who aren't okay," Toto said cautiously.

Christian understood. "That article... only someone trying to create chaos would write it," Christian said.

"I know," Toto said. "For now, I'll see what I can do; she doesn't deserve this."

Something touched Christian beneath those words. No, Toto wasn't referring to them, but it could be taken in both ways.

Something Christian knew about Toto was that he always spoke well of people he cared about. It's undoubtedly something he struggled to differentiate, especially with the nature of the relationship he has with him.

When Toto talks about her, and in this case, with genuine concern, Christian knows that despite their relationship, affection for that person won't disappear – just like his own affection for his wife.

But it's challenging to live in that moment, especially when they talk about it and set aside their relationship.

However, in those same days, as a way to help, Christian spoke with the other Team Principals, communicating that they should all disassociate because no one had made such an accusation. He gathered the courage to highlight Toto's qualities and, biting his tongue a bit, spoke of her qualities.

So that day, everyone communicated simultaneously, releasing the new statement – all the teams in a form of support.

Shortly afterward, Christian received a call.

"I appreciate it," Toto said as the first words Christian heard. "Fred told me you campaigned in the shadows to defend me."

"Well, I... it was the least I could do... you don't deserve... well, neither of you deserves that," Christian said.

"I know how hard you try not to let your thoughts take over... thank you, my love," he whispered on the call.

Christian gave a gentle smile.

"That's what we're here for, to support each other," he said.

"Yes, I'm grateful for this support," Toto said. "We'll see each other, my love, I haven't forgotten... we have a date to keep."

~~

Christmas was tough. Christian believes he has endured everything because his children give him the energy to do so. They haven't spoken since that call, and obviously, Christian is getting desperate. He saw Susie's statements, and she hasn't posted again.

He's trying to be patient and not be anxious as he was in the summer.

"Don't think, don't think," he tells himself.

Three weeks pass, even Christmas and New Year.

During that time, there were a few messages, "I'm traveling, but I promise to see you on New Year's Eve."

The winter felt even darker then. Christian tried to control his thoughts, but it's so difficult when visual images come, scenarios he doesn't want to see. Anxiety appears from time to time, scaring him, making him desperately try to distract himself.

There were days when he cried because he no longer wanted to think. His thoughts screamed that Toto was just using him, other times that he deserved it.

There were days when he simply stared at the sky and wished for the new year to come quickly.

Christmas and New Year passed, and he sent kisses into the air and the sky, hoping the breeze would carry them to Toto.

There had been no messages. A part of him believed he had grown accustomed to it (he hadn't).

When he had returned to work at the factory, there were still no messages or calls. However, Toto's birthday was approaching.

Christian had a shirt made in a soft blue tone, as that color suited Toto perfectly. It was embroidered with Toto's initials and on one of the sleeves, "Te Odio y Te quiero" (I Hate You and I Love You).

He was still deciding whether to send it or wait to give it in person. This time, he felt a bit more prepared to see whatever appeared on social media.

And so it happened. He saw a photo posted by Toto's wife, a shiver ran through him, and he couldn't stop thinking about the way Toto looked at her in that image.

But he decided to silence his mind, telling himself that a photo wouldn't tell him anything, that all he had to do was talk.

So he decided to ignore everything for the day.

A few days later, he received a call while he was at the factory in Milton Keynes.

"Hello," Christian said with a small smile.

"Hello, Mr. Horner... tell me, would you like to go out today?" Toto's deep voice sounded.

"Really?" Christian said with a laugh.

"How willing are you to go out?" Toto said.

"What do you have in mind?" Christian said, thinking it was all a joke.

"The anxiety of wanting to see you," he replied softly. "Now tell me, can you leave the company today? Sneak out?"

Christian hesitated for a moment, but excitement invaded him. It had been so long since they had seen each other; they were going to take a risk.

"Yes, I can," he replied.

"Good, I'll pick you up in half an hour," Toto said.

"Don't you think it would be risky... you..." Christian said.

"I'm not coming in a Mercedes, for your safety, love," he replied.

Later, ironically, a Ford arrived a bit far from the entrance. Christian said he had a meeting elsewhere and would take his car until the next day or later.

"What kind of joke is this?" he said, referring to the car.

"I thought you'd like me to bring you in a Ford," Toto said with a laugh. "You know, it sponsors your team."

"Do you really own a Ford?" Christian said.

"God, no, but at least I made the gesture," Toto said.

"Bastard," Christian said, laughing.

"I missed you," Toto said, leaving a small kiss that deepened.

Toto then took them to an apartment, a private condominium that was only half an hour away.

"This place..." Christian said, thinking it might be a home for Toto and his wife.

"It's an apartment I own," Toto revealed. "Sometimes I come here... usually when I argue with..."

"Oh... so there are no things of..."

"No, just mine," Toto said.

He approached and took Christian's hands.

"I know we need to talk," Toto said.

And after a long time, they allowed themselves to talk. Christian poured out everything his thoughts were telling him until he started to cry.

Toto apologized for provoking such thoughts in Christian, for indirectly hurting him. Even though Christian insisted he was okay, it wasn't enough for Toto. They needed to clarify everything, to build their trust.

Then they agreed that there needed to be changes, that they should talk when discomfort arose, when something bothered them, even if it seemed silly.

Anyone would think that due to the lack of tact, they wouldn't be able to keep their hands off each other. However, they were mature individuals, old enough to talk first before going further.

They did just that. Christian admitted his jealousy, his distancing at times, his fear of reaching out to Toto. Toto did the same, admitting that he had wanted to reach out but remembered Christian and the last time during the summer break.

Some time later, they were in bed, cuddled up and had been talking a lot. Although they weren't doing much more, the way they were together was enough.

Toto looked at the watch he gave to Christian, observed how it looked on Christian's wrist – it looked good.

Christian then looked at him, and they smiled, followed by a kiss.

"I missed you, I love you," said Christian.

They hadn't used that term yet, and Toto smiled satisfactorily.

"I missed you too, I love you," he whispered.

They began kissing again, this time feeling that they had somehow overcome another step. Under different circumstances, Christian might have been more nervous, but this time, he genuinely missed the other's embrace.

The kisses intensified with their breaths. At the moment of surrendering after so much time, desire emerged, and along with a sweet confession, they had to seal their love.

Subsequently, brief dates began to emerge, outings and getaways.

Christian was happier now, feeling that taking risks was okay. He even started occasionally wearing Toto's shirts.

Spring arrived in the garden, butterflies returned to play among the flowers, while they enjoyed the flourishing of their adventure.

But some storms had to happen because there was a secret that had to be discovered sooner or later.

~~~~

I want to thank @silvereds for some inspiration for some scenes in this chapter ♡

[nattousan]

Two roommates and a priest stood huddled around the rotting remains of a hideous oozing creature laying quite dead on their living room floor. Next to it, strewn across the peeling linoleum, lay the shredded remains of a peace lily Yuri's mom had left the night before after she'd "dropped by".

The creature had a ring of foam crusted over a hole on its head they assumed was its mouth, on account of the endless rows of needle sharp teeth jutting from its putrid green gums. Its multitude of bulging glassy eyes stared unblinkingly up at the ceiling.

"Told you it wasn't rats." said Lila to Yuri.

"Must've been the lily that got im, the poor thing, those plants are toxic to most everything they come into contact with" the priest mused.

"Oh really?" Lila said, "That makes sense, my mom used to keep them around the house around Easter and that's usually when one or both of our cats would get really sick. She'd still buy em though, every year, even after one of em died. Said it was apart of god's plan as one of gods creatures"

"This is not one of God's creatures." said the priest, nudging one of the things many segmented limbs, oily black and uncomfortably soft in death.

"Yea no shit"

Yuri ribbed her in the side.

"Ow! Ugh, i mean, no kidding!"

"So, mr. uh..."

" father- "

"Right, Mr. Father, you can get rid of this thing right? Like its a demon? You can just purify it or whatever and it's disintegrate into dust, right?"

"I'm afraid its not that simple." The priest said grimly, "We're going to need to burn the whole house down to its foundation.

"WHAT" both roommates shouted simultaneously.

"I would contact your landlord as soon as possible and get things straightened out, you only have about 4 more hours until sun sets. In the meantime I'll call the fire department and see if they can come out and do a controlled burn. That's the only way you're gonna get out of this safely.

"Wait a damn" -ouch!- "wait a FUCKING second, this is our house!" Lila protested, "the things already dead, why does the whole house need to burn?? You can't just throw us out on the fucking street just like that!"

The priest pursed his lips.

"If you're intent on wasting what little time you have asking for explanations, I can talk while you pack, but I must reiterate that time is of the essence here. Once the sun goes down and they smell one of their own has died, it's not going to be pretty.

"And what the fuck does THAT mean!" wailed Lila, "what are these things!?" but Yuri was already ushering her to her room with a garbage bag.

With Lila distracted, the priest and Yuri moved to the kitchen, where he started transferring what little food they had from the fridge into an insulated cooler.

"So what was that thing? How did it get into our house? None of the windows were broken and its too big to have squeezed in somewhere."

"Oh, no, it lived here already, these types of demons choose a single location to habituate and then remain there for as long as the structure still stands."

Yuri nearly dropped the glass jar of kimchi he was holding.

"What? We've been living here for almost a year, I think we would have noticed a poodle sized blob monster oozing around our apartment."

"Yes, usually people call us within days of moving in, or we hear about it post mortem, but I assure you, that creature has been living here for far longer than you have."

Yuri blanched.

the priest cleared his throat. "Do you both sleep with your door closed?"

"Yes?"

"That's probably why. For the sake of brevity I'm just going to say that they don't really exist during the day. They spend the daytime their own dimension and get called back to this one with the setting of the sun. They are extremely social creatures though so when one of them gets hurt, it releases a smell that marks its attacker and then nowhere is safe for the marked come nightfall."

Yuri finished emptying the fridge, there really wasn't much in there, and moved onto the cabinets. He straightened up and pushed back his long black mop of hair out of his eyes, a gesture he often did when he was stressed.

"So these things have just been crawling around our apartment at night and we just never noticed because we were in our rooms too much?"

"Most likely, did you ever notice things going missing or moved around in the morning? Mysterious moisture spots that didn't seem to clear up?"

"Dude have you seen the apartments in this area? They all have rat problems and mold. This was the only one in the city with two bedrooms under $1200 a month."

The priests demeanor softened a bit.

"I'm sorry. I know this is short notice but the longer you remain here the more likely it is that the mark will transfer to you both and then you'll truly never know peace again."

Yuri gripped the box of expired hamburger helper he was loading into a duffel bag.

"Never had it to begin with..."

The priest gave him a knowing look but didn't pry.

"My church can provide housing in the interim if you don't have... relatives.. in the area."

"You're damn right I don't"

"I'll make the necessary arrangements then."

Over the next two hours the two roommates packed up what little they had into whatever would carry it. Most of it was still in cardboard boxes anyway so it went quick. Still, Lila took her sweet time going through her closet to the point the Priest had taken to pacing by the door after loading everything else into the church's van.

"Lila! What else is left, it's getting close to sundown!" Yuri hollered down the cramped hallway. The priests pacing made him nervous and he'd rather not sour the good graces he'd extended towards them.

"I'm almost done!" Lila hollered back, " You didn't hear me bitching about moving your ridiculous rock collection you insist on dragging around"

"We're nearly out of time here, gentle people," The priest said tersely, glancing out the window, "I suggest you take what you can carry and we seal up the building, Yuri was it? Did you get into contact with your landlord?"

Yuri was helping scoop armfuls of colorful shawls into a laundry basket. "Oh, yea, I called but he didn't pick up, which is usually the case, so I left a voicemai-"

A series of short sharp knocks echoed through the empty apartment before the key turned and swift footsteps filled the hallway.

"Hello?? Ms. Kalimaschev? Ms. Engels?"

Yuri rolled his eyes.

"In here!"

A man appeared at the doorway whom the priest assumed to be their landlord. He was young, maybe his late 30's, with pommed back blonde hair, a bleached white button up and boat shoes. The smile he gave didn't reach his eyes.

"There you are, sorry I missed your call ladies, I was out on the lake." He fixed his gaze on the priest. "What's all this I hear about having to condemn my property?"

The priest stood up and brushed off his knees.

"Yes, I'm sorry sir but the house will soon be quite uninhabitable due to circumstances beyond these two's control, I'll be happy to explain it all at length outside, but first we must get out of the house immediately"

The landlords lips drew taught over his perfectly straight teeth in a hostile grin. He reached into the leather messenger bag hung over his shoulder and pulled out a thick packet of papers.

"Oh, no no no, these two still have three months left on their lease, they can't just declare the place unfit and skip out on rent."

The priest glanced out the window at the diminishing daylight, a bead of sweat running down his dark skin.

"I understand that sir, but like I said, we really do need to move this conversation outside."

The man straightened up, filling the doorway.

"Oh no no no no, no one's going anywhere, what about my property? Do you know how much I've invested in this place? I'm sure whatever damage they've caused can be covered by their deposit. Did you already call the fire department? Can you get them to turn around?"

Yuri bristled. "He says we gotta get out of here, have a look in the living room if you don't believe us."

The landlord smile tightened.

"Oh the thing on the floor? Oooh yea, I'm going to have to fine you for bringing pets in, the lease clearly states "no pets all-"

"Sir, we really don't have time for this, move aside please!"

"Yea, get out of the way dude, lets take this outside!" Yuri said, voice raised with anxiety.

The landlord dropped his smile and narrowed his eyes in a sneer. One hand pulled his phone out of his pocket.

"I will not be talked to like that, young lady, I've already been generous enough letting your kind rent this place, we're staying right here until the authorities arrive. This is my property after a-

Before he could finish his sentence a writhing mass of elongated limbs and gnashing teeth attached itself to his face with a horrid squelch. His body was thrown to the side like he's been punched and they could hear his muffled screams leaking out over the sound of bones crunching.

Lila let out a blood curdling scream and the priest ran to slam the door shut.

Immediately after it shut a heavy and wet weight slammed itself against the cheap particleboard door. The priest threw his weight against it to keep it shut as it was rammed over and over, warping the door a little more each time.

"Alright! We're going to have to go with plan B!" the priest shouted over his shoulder, "Yuri, reach into the holster underneath my cloak!"

"What about Lila??" Yuri yelled, flinching each time the door shook.

"Don't worry about me!" yelled Lila, pulling a katana out of a box in her closet.

The priest crossed himself.

[notinthislife50]

Chapter 8

Previous Chapter

Next Chapter

"Why do you call her Dorothy?" Bruce asked.

"Well, let's see. We have the tin man," you said, pointing at Tony. "The scarecrow," you continued, pointing at Captain America while smirking. "And the cowardly lion," you nodded toward Bruce. "But I'm guessing not by choice, huh, Hulk?"

Maria rolled her eyes. "Okay, enough. We've been watching you for a while, and we think it would be beneficial if you joined our team. We've seen your powers and your apartment," she smirked. "We pay a good wage. What would you have to lose?"

Wade looked at you, saying, "Well, our apartment is a shithole."

You looked at him in shock and huffed, "Our apartment is not a shithole; it's a palace. How dare you!" You frowned at him. "But," you continued, "I did see Captain Blatt trying to start another coup, so maybe we better stay away for a while."

"Alright, Dorothy, we're in," you smacked the table, standing up.

"This is going to be exhausting," Tony whispered.

After a few days, Loki still hadn't said anything.

You were spinning in a chair and threw your head back, whining, "This is so boring. I thought being an Avenger would be more fun."

You then turned to Wade and said, "Hey, want to play hide and seek?"

"What age are you?" Tony asked.

Wade ignored him and turned to you, saying, "Sure, off you go." You shimmered away.

"Hide and seek, really?" the Captain scoffed.

"Yeah, flagpole," Wade shot back. "You're forgetting she's a shape-shifter. I have to work out which of you she has turned into." With that, Wade ran off.

"This should be interesting," Clint laughed, turning to watch Wade on the camera.

Meanwhile, you teleported into the holding cell, scaring a young guard.

"Hey, you know who I am and what I can do," you carefully asked.

He nodded slowly.

"Good, so you know I'm not here to hurt you. But I am going to turn into someone else, so please don't freak out," you pleaded.

You then morphed into Maria Hill.

Turning to the guard, you said, "Just play along. Please."

After a short while, Wade entered the holding cell and saw Maria and some guy looking over files. He walked over.

"Has anyone seen Y/N?" he asked.

"Nope," Maria answered without even looking up. "Aren't you two usually joined at the hip?"

"No, not always," Wade defended.

As the young guy walked off, Wade moved closer to Maria.

"You know Y/N and I aren't a couple," he said.

"Huh huh," Maria still didn't look up.

"Just friends," he tried again.

"Huh huh," Maria replied once more.

Wade then placed a finger on her arm and rubbed it up and down. This caught Maria's attention.

"You know, the first day I saw you, I always thought you were incredibly sexy," he stated.

"Really?" Maria answered, moving in closer.

"Definitely," Wade whispered, leaning closer.

They were almost a hair's length away from each other's lips.

"Wanted to do this for a long time," Wade said, sounding hesitant.

"Me too," Maria agreed, not sounding convincing.

As you both leaned in, Maria stopped and yelled, "Concede," shape-shifting back into yourself. "God, that got too close," Wade despaired. "Too close," you whispered.

Wade then left the room, leaving just you and Loki, who you hadn't noticed was watching you through the whole display.

"Such a waste of talent," he stated.

You whipped around, looking at him.

"This isn't going to be pretty," Natasha said, as the rest of the team were still looking at the cameras.

"You know what, Bambi? All this bravado you have, I see right through it," you said with disdain.

"Oh really?" Loki retorted, trying to look unconcerned.

"Yes, really," you answered. "I'm probably the only one in this entire place who actually feels sorry for you, who actually understands you," you confirmed. "I know what it's like for people to judge me at first glance. I know what it's like for people to judge me before they get to know me," you continued.

"Is that so?" Loki asked. "Are you sure they aren't judging you because of the many people you've killed?" he smirked.

"No," you stated. "I studied my people. I made sure they were murderers, rapists. I made sure they were guilty."

"What I didn't do," you continued, "was throw my toys out of the pram because I didn't get my own way. I didn't go around killing innocent people." You finished.

As you said your last word, you heard a voice from behind you say your name in a stern tone.

"Y/n," the Captain warned.

You whipped around, only to see him looking at you, arms folded, with a scowl on his face.

You whipped back around to Loki.

"Grow the fuck up, Loki." And as you turned on your heel, you passed the Captain and whispered, "Fuck you, Apostle."

@le-snekboi @lokiownsmefr @fraidoftedark

[amberbeach]

'THE HARDEST THING'

gif belongs to me

You started dating Mike when you were teenagers. He was two years older than you, and you remembered feeling special when he spoke to you, as he knew how to make people feel important. And Mike often told you that, family aside, you were one of the most important people in his life.

Leo often teased you back then, asking, "When's the wedding?" and you had always laughed it off, but fast forward several years, and here you were, married to your childhood sweetheart.

It wasn't always smooth sailing, no marriage was, but you still believed that you and Mike could survive anything. Fighting wasn't common between you both, as you had a proactive approach, talking about issues before they became problems and led to arguments. But you had been apart from your husband for a few months and when you were finally reunited, it hadn't exactly gone the way you had hoped.

Mike always told you that you were capable of anything, resilient, and not easily defeated when things got tough. But lately, you felt as if he didn't believe it anymore, trying to side-line you from the action, and it frustrated you to no end. When you tried talking to him, he shut you down, not letting you fight your case, and you found yourself standing in your quarters, shouting at each other from across the room after you found out he had spoken to your commander, once again keeping you from the action.

Mike was growing more and more frustrated, feeling backed into a corner, which only added to his temper as you persistently tried to convince him you were fully capable of going on the mission. Leo had entered during the early stages of your argument and immediately regretted it. When he tried to stay out of it, you ordered him to sit down, and the Red Ranger took a seat without argument, surprised as he listened to you both fight, his eyes wide as it escalated until insults were thrown.

You were stunned into silence when Mike mentioned one of your biggest insecurities, and from his expression, you knew he was equally shocked, and just like that, the fight was over. You stormed out of your quarters and Mike sighed as he watched you go, taking a seat, resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

"What's going on with you two?" Leo spoke up after a few moments, and Mike looked over at his younger brother, sitting back in the chair. And Mike told him about his fears about you fighting against Trakeena and his fears of losing you. Leo understood and knew how much Mike missed the times when you could hike in the hills, overlooking the city from a secluded spot, and forget about the war raging around you long before you joined the fight.

After the brotherly heart-to-heart, Mike left your shared quarters to search for you, finding you standing at a window, arms crossed as you stared out at the stars. You sensed him approaching but didn't glance in his direction, your eyes admiring the stars while he admired you.

"I'm sorry." He spoke up after a few moments, placing his hands behind his back as he looked out the window at the stars. "I didn't mean it."

"Why did you say it?" Your tone was frosty and Mike's shoulders deflated at the possibility of reigniting your fight.

"Because I don't want to lose you." He explained, turning his head to meet your gaze when he noticed you looking at him. "We're not teenagers anymore. We've changed, and you've grown into a formidable force. But that doesn't stop me from worrying about you. I look at you, and I travel back to when I first saw you. We're older now, but I will always be protective over you." He sighed, looking out at the stars. "I never thought there would come a day when we would be apart, but..." He trailed off, and you turned to him fully when his gaze met yours. "I am just so damn scared of losing you again."

You stepped forward, wrapping your arms around his neck, feeling his arms embrace your waist, and resting your chin on his shoulder. "You'll never lose me." You whispered gently. "I want this war over just as much as you do. I watch you, and Leo leave all the time, and it kills me because I could never do anything to help you before. Now I have the chance to."

You lifted your head to meet his gaze, and Mike nodded softly. "I know. I know." He sighed, resting his forehead against yours, and you both closed your eyes.

You placed your hands on the nape of his neck, smiling softly. Mike opened his eyes and lifted his head, meeting your gaze. "I rescinded my statement. They're expecting you at 0800."

You kissed him tenderly, and Mike placed his hands on your cheeks, bringing you closer. You knew how hard it was for him to take a step back and let you carve your own path. After all, you had done the same for him before. The hardest thing you could do in a relationship amid a galactic war was to let your lover join the fight. And Mike understood how you felt when he was determined to do the same all those years ago.

[amberjazmyn]

dr spencer reid one shot

𝓲𝓶𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓮 - you look(ed) happier

𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 - kinda sad, mentions/actions of domestic relationship abuse, but it does get better, single x reid, mentions of maeve

𝓭𝓮𝓼𝓬𝓻𝓲𝓹𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 - with the lyrics of ed sheeran's "happier" we find out the love story/breakup/re-get-together of bau agents dr spencer reid and valencia callahan 

𝓪𝓾𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓻'𝓼 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓮 - i have done this one-shot a couple of times before but i was listening to the song again and i wanted to do it again. i decided to make a spencer reid version with some insta posts and stuff cause imagine the bau having personal instagram and social media accounts.

masterlist

- - -

walking down 29th and park, i saw you in another's arms. 

dr spencer reid couldn't help but feel his heart slightly sinking low into his chest as he noticed his now ex-girlfriend but fellow bau agent walk into the bau in another man's arms as spencer stormed into the conference room to let off some steam just before he and his team would most likely get called for a new case. the worst part of this whole thing for spencer, now that his ex had left him, was that they'd still be working together since neither one of them would ever force the other person to leave their jobs just because they were no longer dating each other but not just that, she decided to bring her new boyfriend to introduce them to the rest of the team. this obviously meant that it wasn't just valencia joining everyoone in the bullpen, her new boyfriend was also going to be with them and having to be introduced to them and spencer since he and valencia were still close friends, not having the heart or the hate in them to drop contact with each other. spencer never hated valencia after the two of them broke up, no way, he couldn't ever hate his childhood best friend and now fellow bau agent, he was honestly grateful that valencia still decided to stay with the bau even though she was no longer with spencer, except, the thing that threw him off was the fact that he had never imagined or prepared himself to see her walk into the bau with another guy.

only a month we've been apart, you look happier. 

the thing though, that hurt spencer over anything else was that this new boyfriend made valencia look so much happier, happier than she ever seemed to be when she was with spencer. derek morgan, one of spencer's fellow agent and closest friend had suddenly noticed why spencer was looking off into the distance, the chigaconian trying to get the nevadian man to leave the conference room - the nevadian whacking derek's hand away, spencer couldn't help but notice something else that he so desperately missed about valencia - her laugh. 

once again, spencer's heart almost closed in on his chest as he watched and heard her laugh. he didn't know what to do, i mean, who would know what to do in this situation? derek certainly didn't know, he felt inexplicably guilty and devastated for his best friend, derek was now dating and in a secure relationship with an e.d nurse, savannah, whereas, spencer had his heart broken because unfortunately, valencia and spencer broke up for reasons that, at the time, seemed appropriate and it seemed like the both of them were on the same page at the time. and, all of a sudden, derek watched as his best friend was devastated over the thought of seeing his ex and his best friend cosying up to another man only after what seemed to be a month after spencer and she had broken up.

saw you walk inside a bar, he said something to make you laugh.  

there was still no set time that the team was going to be called in for a case and it was already 8 in the evening which made it seem like no case was going to be called until the next day. so, that was when valencia, at the idea of her new man, decided to check out some pubs and clubs and if it just happened that the team got called in, the team would get called in. so, spencer watched as valencia and her new beau walked outside of the fbi building and strolled into a nearby bar but, not before the guy made a truly horrendous joke, and it wasn't even a joke that spencer would have found funny or a joke that valencia would have found funny if spencer had said it and matched it with a disappointed face as though she was the embarrassed kid of spencer, but because it was this new man that had said it, it had made valencia laugh out loud. so loud that spencer and derek heard it from their sixth floor in the fbi building as did the rest of the agents on that floor and all the other patrons who were walking past them. both of them, spencer and derek, saw how happy valencia was and it truly devastated both of them, their shoulders sinking to their regular positions as spencer tried to look away.

"...val, i have a joke for you..." the still unidentified new beau of valencia's asked, valencia smiled, nodding her head as the man continued 

"...what would you get if a dinosaur kicked you in the rear end?" he asked, his voice already cracking with laughter and he hadn't even finished the joke - spencer almost puking because he hated how close the guy was to valencia 

"i dunno, what do you get?" valencia sort of laughed, not like an excited or happy laugh but, the laugh spencer would usually hear when he'd try to tell her a joke so, for a second, the boy wonder did have hope that she wouldn't laugh at the guys joke but, that was until he said the punchline of the joke 

"you get a megasoreass!" and just as spencer and derek didn't laugh at the joke, they hoped and prayed valencia wouldn't laugh but, she did, she laughed at the utterly horrendous joke that her date had made 

and she laughed wholeheartedly, with her whole body, her head flying backward as her hand rested on the man's chest and her head then moved to lean on it so she could control herself. 

"oh, that was a kicker! that was actually really funny!" valencia's voice went high-pitched as her voice broke from her laughing fit, wiping away a tear from her eye as the two then walked into the bar

and it was at that moment that spencer knew he really couldn't stand watching those two anymore, even though he still absolutely adored valencia, he knew it wouldn't do him any good if he continued to focus on her when it was clear she had moved on completely whilst he still was hung up on her. 

i saw that both your smiles were twice as wide as ours yeah, you look happier, you do. 

it wasn't rocket science for anyone to see that spencer knew that valencia's smile was twice as wide as the ones she smiled when she was with spencer and it made him feel sick to his stomach. it hurt the boy wonder terribly to know that possibly, this new boyfriend of valencia's was everything that spencer wasn't and that he couldn't make her happier as this new man did in comparison. spencer's heart felt like it was being crushed and this pain wasn't just a metaphorical pain, oh no, it was such a physical pain that spencer's face started to scrunch up in pain as he would wince occasionally. 

thankfully, it didn't take derek that long to convince spencer that they needed to return back to their desks and away from the open conference room windows so that spencer wasn't putting himself through more pain, especially due to the "fun" that they would be having during their waiting time of whether or not they'd be shipped out to a case tonight. however, spencer couldn't help but wait until valencia and this new boyfriend had gone further away into the bar before he moved so that he could have one last look at her before the slight possibility of him catching eyes with her tonight during the potential of a case briefing.

ain't nobody hurt you like i hurt you, but ain't nobody love you like i do. 

despite the slight privacy that spencer and valencia both had about their lives, not really the type to overshare whilst being in the public eye of the rest of the fbi agents and government officials, they decided to come clean about their breakup to at least their own team. and then, their breakup was announced but it sadly was heard further than just their own small, intimate, family-like team and spread further throughout the other fbi units. and immediately, rumours from the other units like sex crimes and violent crimes units started to come about that spencer and valencia's breakup was "messy" and that one of them cheated on the other one or something completely dramatic like a soap opera. however, that was the furthest from the actual reality of what actually went down and the reason why the two popular and favoured bau agents broke up. they decided, spencer and valencia, that right now it had gotten too dangerous for them to be dating due to how personal the cases in regards to the team had gotten and it felt safer if they weren't romantically linked. and, it was true, all recent cases had no team injuries because there was no way those personal cases could affect the team more than it usually could in a personal way because no one was in a relationship with one of their fellow agents so there was no way they could be targeted. however, even after explaining that to the other fbi units, rumours still flew around the fbi building until aaron hotchner and erin strauss had to shut it down completely because it started to get out of hand.

however, spencer and valencia hated having to constantly repeat themselves and remind people that there was nothing about one of them cheating or anything silly like that and that the reason they broke up was for safety reasons. because, in actuality, the breakup was mutual between the two and it was made clear from the very beginning that if they were going to find someone new, outside of the bau where they wouldn't have their lives further messed with, that it was okay and that the two of them would and are always the best of friends, no matter what. they both meant the world to each other and there was no way they could remove the other from their life. to them, what they said in their own words was that they were each other's right person but it was the wrong time and it broke spencer and valencia's hearts to break up with each other despite how mutual it was and how much safer they both were because of how much they loved and still love each other. the only reason why valencia and spencer broke up was because not only was it for safety reasons but it was also because it was the case of right person for each other but, it wasn't the right time and that was why it was so painful for the both of them.

"...hey, reid, you know that it wasn't either you or valencia's fault as to the reason why you two broke up?" derek spoke softly as he watched, keeping an eye on his still heartbroken friend sulk over watching his ex who was still his best friend, who he still loved dearly, look way happier with the new guy than she ever did with him

"i...i know that rationally, morgan it just, hurts seeing her look so much happier with someone else..." spencer sniffled solemnly, resting his hands on his chin as derek rubbed his best friend's back

"...it does hurt, reid, i know that but, don't forget that, sure val has a new man who won't be targeted by the people we hunt but, she still loves you so much and only wants the best for you. and i think that's why she didn't leave the bau because she knew that if she left even though you guys were no longer going to be together that you'd still rather have her stay and not be together then leave and not be together. of course though, it is really sucky for the whole team to see she's moved on with someone else but, we all have to just look past that and be glad that she's still with us in the team. trust me, from someone who was always seen as a flirt who would never actually take a relationship seriously until i found the one, it'll get better and, who knows, maybe one day, she'll realise that this happy with this guy isn't the happy she wants and, she'll find her way back to you, even if means the two of you are in danger again..." derek smiled softly, trying to convince spencer who just nods his head in response although, it was still quite difficult to believe his best friend

promise that i will not take it personal, baby if you're moving on with someone new. 

spencer promised, basically pinky promised, the day that he and valencia broke up, that he wouldn't take it personally and be that arsehole ex-boyfriend if valencia was to find someone new and move on. he knew that valencia was bound to move on quickly anyway so, he made a promise not to take it personally (as did she) and that just because she's moved on quickly, it doesn't mean that she wasn't grateful or faking any of her feelings towards spencer or acting as though it was nothing. because, honestly, valencia was on cloud nine throughout her whole relationship with spencer, it was just honest to god the fear of them being targeted by unsubs who had a personal connection to them because of their jobs and keeping them safe, not their love or chemistry for one another.

"...wait, you can't be serious...boy wonder and girl wonder broke up?" garcia was devastated at the news that her fellow agents, reid and callahan just gave her and the rest of their team

"yes, we had to, pen. for our safety to make sure that if we ever faced an unsub who had a personal connection to either one of us that they wouldn't target them. we still love each other very much and wish this didn't have to happen but it does and, if it's for our safety and not because we fell out love then, that's the smart thing to do," valencia sighed, a look of morose in her eyes as hotch spoke up

"...if there is anything the team can do for the two of you, reid and callahan, please, let us know and we'll do everything and anything we can to assist you. i'm guessing you've already talked about whether or not one of you is leaving?" hotch questioned, reid and callahan both appreciating the worry and care from their team and unit chief

"thank you, hotch but, right now, i honestly think spence and i just need some alone time and yes, we have both decided to stay since there's no reason why we wouldn't be able to work together even though we're no longer dating one another..." valencia was really taking the speaking role seriously as spencer just nodded his head and looked around the room trying to avoid the teams gaze of pity and sadness

"...of course. and i'm glad you two will be able to continue to work together because you guys are a brilliant team and shouldn't leave us just yet. and, if the rest of the team could follow me and return to your desks to finish paperwork or anything else you need to get done, it's time we leave reid and callahan on their own like they've asked us to," hotch gestures for the team to follow him out of the conference room which they do without needing to be asked twice

after giving hugs to both spencer and valencia, hotch smiles and gives his two best (and youngest) agents a reassuring head-nod before closing the door behind them, giving the two of them some privacy whilst they said their last words about the break-up before they'd have to go back to their friendship they had at the beginning of their time in the unit.

"...spence, do you promise me something?" valencia spoke up after a long pause of silence as spencer nodded his head, lifting it up from the floor as he held valencia's hand tightly

the two twenty-somethings had already been broken up with each other privately but, now, they were still wanting to say some last minute things that they either already said and wanted to say again to make sure it was known to be the truth and not just some lie that was said in the moment to soften the harsh blow of the breakup conversation was. both of them tearing up and getting emotional, it once again became silent as small sniffles and uneven breaths fell through the room as the two agents tired to calm themselves down before continuing the conversation. having to constantly remind themselves that the reason why they broke up wasn't because they weren't in love with each other anymore or because they were never best friends to begin with, it was because it was for their safety and because it was two people who were absolutely right for each other but started their relationship at the wrong time where it was immensly dangerous and could have caused a lot of problems had the unsubs actually dug deep enough into their victims at the behavioural analysis unit. that's all it was, they still love each other but, that was the true, real reason why spencer reid and valencia callahan broke up, it breaking up now was the right thing and the safest thing so they both could stay alive and save their special thing and then find out later on that it was safer for them to continue their relationship again then that's what they were going to do because they didn't want to ruin it by continuing to pursue their relationship in a time of utter danger and fear for the entire bau and their romantic relationships.

"always, val, what is it?" spencer finally filled in the silence, sniffling softly as valencia's hand ghosts over spencer's as they could tell, even with the shutters in the conference room shut and the door closed, they could tell their team members were trying to figure out what they were talking about - almost nothing could be hidden or a secret when you're a member of the bau that's for sure

that was until spencer and valencia could hear their team getting told off by hotch for eavesdropping and told the main perps, derek, jj and penelope, to be put in lockdown in penelope's bat cave away from everyone and where they couldn't hear spencer and valencia's conversation. thankfully, emily prentiss and david rossi weren't that much of eavesdroppers but were very concerned about their two youngest agents and did wait for them to come out of the conference room after their private conversation to check on them, not at all asking for what their private conversation entailed.

"promise me that if i do move on with someone new who most likely won't get targeted by any unsubs and isn't with the fbi, you won't take it personally and hate me for it?" valencia only gulped as she kept her eyes focused on spencer and his reactions as spencer nodded his head, his eyes whilst glistening with tears were also genuine

"yes, i promise. i love you too much to hate you," spencer choked out in a whisper, more tears building in his eyes as he breathed in, asking valencia a question

"can you promise me something?" spencer whispered back, clearing his throat as valencia nodded her head, her hand touching spencer's as they kept eye contact with each other

"of course, always, what is it?" valencia questioned softly, only wishing she and spencer didn't have to do this all over again but knew they had to

"am...well, are we still best friends? even if you may date someone else after me?" it was this question that broke spencer's heart to say as finally, a tear rolls down his cheek as he closes his eyes, valencia breathing deeply so she wouldn't cry her tears as she wipes spencer's tear away, glad that hotch had forced the rest of the team out

smiling softly with a head nod, valencia responded, "of course, we're still gonna be best friends, spence! i've known you my whole life, i could never throw away our entire relationship and friendship just because we dated the right people but at the wrong time. i couldn't ever remove you from my life, you're way too special to me, i can't do that and i will never do that..." valencia paused as she wiped away more of spencer's silent tears as he nodded his head, understanding valencia which made her feel better 

"...even if i do end up dating someone else who isn't going to be targeted specifically because we're both agents and if you end up dating someone else, i am always a phone call away or a short drive away if you ever need anything and, i know if i was in a similar situation, you'd be there waiting for me too," valencia smiled and spencer nodded his head as his lip trembled, another single tear slipping down his cheek as he giggled in embarrassment, wiping it away himself 

spencer and valencia talked for a couple more minutes and decided that the things they co-owned in each other's apartments were not to be moved no matter what and that they could always count on one another. along with another crying session and huge hug to comfort one another, with some tissues that they hadn't realised at the beginning that hotch had placed on the table before the team left, they both cleaned themselves up and walked back to their little desk spaces and continued working. and only then, when spencer and valencia returned to their desk spaces were derek and jj allowed to emerge from penelope's bat cave... and also forced to apologise to reid and callahan for trying to eavesdrop into the conversation, as did penelope but she didn't need to be forced, it just slipped out because she panicked and felt awful for potentially betraying their trust over something that maybe in time they'd tell their team as to what they told each other. but all was forgiven with a small sleepover at penelope's at the end of the day since it had gotten to late for the team to get called to a case so it would be managed the next morning.

'cause baby you look happier, you do, my friends told me one day, i'll feel it too. 

it still seemed impossible for spencer to get it out of his head that valencia seemed to look happier with her new boyfriend after the break-up and honestly, whilst he was proud of her, it still hurt and was a hard thing to just shake off. it honestly did sort of scare spencer that he thought that he was maybe getting replaced and that maybe, he was actually losing his best friend when it was considered that he still didn't know what this new boyfriend was like in relation to knowing about boy-best friends for his girlfriends. 

"oi, reid, we need to get ready, hotch has finally called for wheels up in fifteen, when we see valencia stay calm, okay?" derek announces to spencer, patting his shoulder as the boy wonder nods his head, his satchel go-bag hanging around his body 

"yes, morgan, i understand, i'm not a five-year-old!" spencer, with a sassy attitude, rolls his eyes as he chuckles, making derek smile at the attitude and eye-roll 

"i know, reid, forgive me but, i just don't want you getting hurt, that's all!" derek suddenly went serious as spencer smiled and pulled his best friend in for a hug 

"thanks, morgan, i do appreciate it," spencer smiled into his best friend's shoulder and derek smiled too, exhaling slightly as he pats his best friend on the back 

"no worries, buddy. i know how much you and valencia loved and still love each other. it is hard when a couple like you two, that are the right couple, break up due to it being the wrong time," derek smiles softly, the two men pulling out of the hug as they started to hear the commotion of penelope and rossi arguing over whether it's ethical to put tofu in pasta in the conference room

and until then i'll smile to hide the truth, but i know i was happier with you. 

all that was left for spencer and his team to do in regards to getting ready for the case was being briefed on the case by penelope and hotch and then set off to the jet strip so they could travel to their location of the case. with a small sound of apology for being late, valencia and her man had rushed in slightly late and, it was clear the reason why and it was because of the bar down the road. which was so unlike valencia that hotch ignored it but kept a watchful eye on her new unidentified beau just in case valencia was manipulated to just about inebriate herself before jetting off for a case.

derek and the rest of the team had to force themselves to not jump in excitement as spencer turned around, a smile on his face as rushed over to valencia to give her a hug since valencia had just come back from having some vaction time. the former boyfriend and girlfriend are now just staring at each other in awe. it had felt like years had gone by since valencia had seen spencer when really it was a couple of weeks to a month, not even? pretty much as soon as they broke up, hotch reminded valencia of her vaction time off to visit her family in hawaii and on that very same day, the next flight, valencia left for hawaii. and it was during this vaction back home to hawaii that valencia and her new boyfriend had met, he was a nursing student at the hospital that valencia frequented for it was the hospital her ill-ridden mother was hospitalised in and honestly, it still felt strange to her that when she introduced her boyfriend to people, she wasn't saying spencer.

"spence!" valencia finally opened her mouth, spencer's name falling off her tongue effortlessly as if she never stopped saying it, spencer's face lighting up at seeing his best friend, her new boyfriend giving not just the best friend's a strange look but his girlfriend's entire workplace and bau team a strange look that spencer managed to catch from the corner of his eye

"hey val! how are you, how was hawaii and seeing your family? i've missed you so much!" spencer spoke excitedly, the excitement of valencia constrasted far differently to the case they were about to leave for but was welcomed for just a small bit of happiness before seeing pure darkness for the next few days as spencer pulls his best friend in for a hug

placing her softly back to the ground, valencia responded, "i'm fantastic thanks spence, hawaii was great, family's great and it seems like mom's medical trial is working! how have you been? were you able to go back to las vegas to visit your mom at all? it's been like, what, a few weeks since we last saw each other since i just up and left for hawaii for vaction whilst we should have techncially been working a case?" the girl asked with a slight laugh in her breath as spencer nodded his head, a small giggle leaving his mouth as well

"yeah...wow, it's been a long few weeks, that's crazy...oh and, no, unfortunately i didn't get to see mom this time but i did get to have a chat with her carers and they seem to think that she's doing good as well. and, that's amazing that your mom's trial seems to be working too. i just hope the next step is for her to be discharged from the hospital and back with your family..." spencer spoke with a small whisper towards the end as he noticed the way valencia tried to grab her boyfriend but wasn't able to as he had suddenly and silently left the bau conference room without a word of acknowledgement of where it was he had left off to in the huge bau and further fbi building

"...oh and, by...by the way, that was my boyfriend matteo..." valencia tried to smile but, it was obvious that spencer and the other profilers could see through it but decided against the profiling questions for now

"...well, that's nice, val. how...how long have you two been together for, if you don't mind me asking?" spencer spoke softly, with hesitation as valencia tilted her head in confusion - was it three weeks or four weeks as it surely hadn't been for the whole time she was back home in hawaii

also, the team just stood back in silence and just watched even though they should very much be on the jet right now and on their way to los angeles, california for their case that was more or likely going to turn time sensitive soon.

"uhh...i...i think three weeks? so, not that long..." valencia shyly smiles as spencer nodded his head as hotch gestured for this conversation to continue on the way to the jet and for penelope to go into her batcave and present the case from there as they travelled to their destination

hearing that valencia and matteo had only been together for less than a month was comforting to spencer because it meant whilst she had moved on, it wasn't straight away which was his biggest fear. so it comforted him to know that the love of his life and best friend didn't move on the second they broke up.

"oh, okay, that's nice, val. he treats you well i'm assuming?" spencer questioned as the two of them moved quite briskly towards the jet strip to the private jet when valencia suddenly came nervous as she still had no idea where her boyfriend had gotten himself into in the fbi building cause he noticed how many more floors there were than just level 6: behavioural analysis unit

"uh...well, yeah i guess he does. i mean, he makes me laugh a lot, i guess..." valencia stammered, her voice shaky and sounding unsure which confused spencer as earlier, nothing looked as though it was wrong or out of sorts

as they settled onto the plane, awaiting penelope's presentation of the case, spencer whispered, "...you guess? val...is matteo hurt--"

"--hello my fine and furry friends--"

"--matteo?" how on earth did matteo find himself in penelope's bat cave of all places on level six? penelope was just as confused as her team who gave wide-eyed stares at matteo who stood behind penelope as she continued presenting the case

"ignoring italian stallion over here, today's case has you guys travelling to sunny los angeles, california except it isn't sunny but rather bloody and gloomy... over the last week and a half, lapd have been getting constant phone calls about killings of a very specific type of victim every saturday afternoon at exactly 13:00pm..."

"...and before you ask, the victims are blonde, blue-eyed, attractive college-aged girls who were all found in dark, trashed alleyways behind trashbins with deep lacerations, burn marks and branding marks all around their bodies. the lacerations are horizontal on the arms, vertical on the legs, the burns are present everywhere else where there are no lacerations and the brand marks are across their left collarbones... there were five of them..." penelope has a look of distaste on her face after showing her team mates the high graphic and gruesome images as the team all squirm in their plane seats - but just before penelope could continue, matteo speaks up

"--hey, sweetcheeks, valencia, could you introduce me to your coworkers please?" matteo suddenly takes over penelope's system as valencia wishes she'd be swallowed into a black hole as her whole team looks pissed off but confused

"not now, please, matteo, isn't it obvious i'm working?!" valencia raises her voice which was easy to profile to her team that it wasn't the first time that matteo tried to interject himself into valencia's work life

"fine, besides, there's nothing really interesting in this room anyway. but don't forget to remind everyone in la that you have a boyfriend, his name is matteo and that he's oh so attractive," matteo sounded like a middle schooler as everyone cringed as matteo escorted himself out of penelope's batcave as everyone all released a breath they had no idea they were all collectively holding - valencia included

"oh my...i...i am so sorry guys. i...i had no idea matteo was going to do that when i suggested i invite him to come to the bau with me before the case. he came with me because i wanted to introduce you guys to him...i had no idea he even knew where to find penelope's batcave let alone follow her into it but, like he's already said...everyone's that's my boyfriend matteo la costa and he works as a nursing student at a local community college hospital in downtown virginia..." valencia apologised, her face burning red with embarrassment as no one told her off or scolded her for her boyfriend's stupid actions as penelope quickly got back on track with the case presentation

"...sorry to do this but bringing you guys all back to the cali killings, not only were the girls all blondes, blue-eyed, extremely attractive and attending college, they were all attending the same college and they all hung out in the same circle of friends...." penelope mentions with her usual disgusted attitude as reid speaks up

"...that means we're likely dealing with someone who also goes to the same college as the girls and could be someone who was ignored by the girls or was shunned away from the group of friends maybe and has come back for revenge in the most sadistic way because just texting them off-handed mean comments or teasing them out during college classes is too tame and not enough for the unsub?" reid suggested as valencia and everyone else nodded in possibility of that being the theory

"that or, it's a jealous boyfriend/girlfriend who was rejected by one of the girls in the circle and is now determined to take out all the girls until he can really hit big time money with the girl who originally rejected him by killing her friends off meaning that it's easier to get to the grand finale, his final victim because he's taken out all of her friends along the way to get to her?" valencia theorised and, honestly, that theory was just as brilliant as reid's as hotch spoke up

"garcia, you mentioned they were all burnt, given lacerations and branded but did you get the cod by the medical examiner?" hotch spoke up, flipping down the case file he held in his lap as penelope shook her head, a look of apology in her eyes

"no, i didn't good sir hotch. but, if it's needed, i can by all means speed up the process with some good bribes and a deal of lollies and unlimited love from the behavioural analysis unit forever?" penelope joked which got some stifles of laughter as hotch nodded his head

"thank you garcia, do that and find everything else you can in regards to separate info on the girls since we know how well they are connected to each other, we need to know about these girls independently, whether they ever spent time away from the group and if anyone else they made contact with could be in potentional danger," hotch stated and penelope nodded her head

"faster than a donkey on a leash, later nerds!" penelope signs out as the team go back to brainstorming more information about the case

after brainstorming a little more and another two interruptions from valencia's boyfriend, matteo, his excuse being he missed her and wanted to make sure she was safe even though they were still on their flight to california, they started to figure out more possibilities and hotch split his team up into twos and threes. spencer and valencia went to the coroner to figure out if they could figure out the cod any faster than penelope could whilst rossi and morgan went to the crime scenes and emily, jj and hotch went to the lapd to interview the families of the victims and start victimology and a geographical profile.

fast forwarding three days later, it seemed as if valencia's initial theory was correct. the unsub, twenty-one-year-old college student becka johnson and her boyfriend connor freehly had abducted the girls, twenty-year-old lisa lloyd, nineteen-year-old sallie hawkins, twenty-one-year-old spencer romanov, twenty-two-year-old abigail romanov and twenty-three-year-old jaqueline reynolds. thankfully, just before the unsubs could capture and murder the sixth girl in the ten-strong friend group, who wasn't even the main girl they were trying to kill, twenty-year-old lyla smith, the bau and lapd moved in on them just before they could kill and caught them. spencer and valencia arrested and read becka johnson and connor freehly's miranda rights before not so kindly shoving them into the police vans before running back over to help lyla since the rest of the team hadn't arrived just yet. untying the poor girl from the ropes that caused the ligature burn marks on all the victims wrists, relieved lyla of that pain before she could have endured even more pain or even death. all because her and her group had the girl in the group that rejected the advances of becka and connor, all because they were both bisexual and wanted a third partner for their polyamorous relationship and reacted in anger and murder when they were told no and that the person they asked was very much straight, in a commited relationship and felt very personally uncomfortable about a poly relationship. which, in all fairness, should have been totally fine and didn't need five innocent young girls and nearly a sixth one to be killed when the person rejecting the unsubs was respectful, kind and didn't show any hate or homophobia or predijuce in regards to their response to their question.

a couple hours later and the bau were back on their private jet back home to quantico and, the one person everyone didn't want to see after that stupid fiassco that happened on the flight over to california, matteo, was waiting for the team and valencia on the air strip. groaning, everyone, including valencia, only hoped that this time, matteo would try to insert himself into his girlfriend's important job and her very long and strenuous job. why did she and spencer agree to the break-up, actually? the best part of dating another fbi agent was that they wouldn't ever try to insert themselves into your job because it was the same job as their partners. whereas, a downside to dating someone who isn't in law enforcement but specifically fbi, that person would always try to self-insert themselves into the job because it was seen as "far more exciting" and "soul-enriching job" than their "boring, blase job" back at home was. thankfully though, it seemed as though matteo, just like the team, was drop-dead exhausted and just wanted to pick up his girlfriend and safely take her back to her apartment and maybe stay with her to make sure she stayed safe after the case.

even though she wasn't too keen on it, valencia took a deep breath and wandered over to matteo and allowed him to hug her since it had been a couple of days since they had last communicated and seen one another.

"hey baby, you catch the killer?" matteo muttered, valencia mumbling a "yup" as matteo wanted no further information which slightly threw her off wack as when she and spencer were together, it never mattered if they were working in the same trio or duo, they still debriefed about the case at the end of it, whether it was on the drive home or on their couch or bed at home, they always unloaded and debriefed about their case

just as matteo was about to drag valencia to their car to go home, valencia decided that now was the best option to finally and physically, face-to-face, introduce her boyfriend to her team rather than just leaving an introduction to whatever his introduction was on the plane ride to california.

since no one had actually made plans to move their feet from their positions on the ground, it didn't take much convincing for valencia to formally introduce her team to her boyfriend, "hey guys, i know we're all about to leave to go back home but, i thought i'd just finally formally introduce you to my boyfriend, matteo!" valencia smiled, trying to hide her nerves as everyone smiled and waved back as matteo only just had energy to return back the gesture

taking that as his cue, matteo introduced himself again, "hey guys, i'm matteo, i'm really sorry for how i acted when you guys were on the jet. it was very inappropriate and inconsiderate because you guys were working and i shouldn't have self-inserted myself into valencia's job..." ok, wow, this is the most apologetic and genuine he's sounded the entire time since they had met him - the team still cautious but stepped forward and individually introduced themselves

"hi, matteo," they all responded at the same time, slightly shocking matteo as his expression doesn't change, all of them coming forward indivdually to shake his hand, though none of them even wanted to associate themselves with the guy, even hotch and rossi

"i'm jj but you can call me jennifer,"

"i'm emily,"

"i'm penelope,"

"derek,"

"i'm david,"

"i'm spencer,"

"and i'm aaron, remember sonny jim, if you try anything to hurt our valencia, don't forget that we are fbi agents and it wouldn't be too difficult for us to notice when something's fishy, alright? take care of valencia, she's our girl too," aaron finished up the introductions which seemed to intimidate matteo which truthfully humoured the team, valencia included as matteo nodded his head before rushing off to the car

and without stopping to give his girlfriend a kiss, or an i love you or even a simple explanation as to why he had decided to run for it without his girlfriend who had the keys and the car to drive the both of them back to valencia's apartment. and that really made spencer and the rest of the team raise their eyebrows, especially after hotch's threat.

and, it obviously rattled valencia but, she tried to hide it, "umm, yeah, again, that's my boyfriend matteo and i think you may have just scared the living shit out of him, hotch, thanks by the way, now i'll have to deal with him whining all night that he's traumatised and can't fall asleep," valencia said with full sarcasam and little jazz hands as everyone's eyes widened - that little threat traumatised matteo? jesus christ, this guy's meant to be a nursing student and he finds that traumatising?

"o...kay, that was weird. umm, are you alright, val? do you need one of us to walk you back to your car just in case matteo didn't go there but back to the bar you guys were at earlier?" spencer asked, trying not to be too obvious as valencia nodded her head

"could you do that, please? this case really messed with me and i don't think i could deal with walking on my own in the dark..." valencia shivered as spencer nodded his head but, the entire team started to walk with them even though they all parked their cars in different levels of the secure parking garage

"...umm, guys, why are you following me and spence?" valencia chuckled when she noticed the rest of the team followed her and spence

"we don't have places we need to be urgently, callahan. please, let us help you walk to your car safely, it's the first time we've formally met your new boyfriend and we can't be too careful now can we?" hotch spoke up as valencia couldn't argue so she didn't push it any further and appreciated her team more

walking at least a mile more and up a level, they finally made it to valencia's car and, they did not expect to see matteo waiting patiently in front of the hood of her car. they had all genuinely thought he would have strolled back on into that bar and drunk himself silly but, no, he was calmly waiting at the car, seemingly ready to go back to his gf's apartment. but, it wasn't until the rest of the team started walking away when matteo started making conversation with spencer.

"...excuse me...you..you said you were spen-sam, right?" matteo was nervous as he lightly tapped spencer's shoulder as he turned around, valencia, again, wanting a black hole to just swallow her up at her bf's purposeful nature of calling spencer by the wrong name

"no...no, my name isn't sam...it's spencer but, whatever, what's up?" spencer continued even though it annoyed him slightly at matteo's purposeful refusal to correctly say his name

"how...how long did you and valencia date? when me and val first met, before we even started to date, she was telling me about how she's with the fbi and was dating a fellow fbi agent but never said any details like how long you guys dated or why you broke up or anything...and i...i was just wondering how long you guys were together for before you decided to break things off..." okay, no, it was clear at this stage that he hadn't been at his car the whole time, matteo had definitely had some hard beers before stumbling his way back to the car and attempting to sober himself up so it looked like he had been there the entire time

"...oh, umm, we---"

"--how long ago did you meet valencia, matteo?" spencer cut off valencia before she could reveal that information straight away which valencia seemed relieved by

"oh...we..uh, we met around four weeks ago in hawaii during valencia's vaction and mine as well but we'd been talking for a week before we met but we started dating three weeks ago--"

"--so yeah, it's still quite new and it's been interesting as matteo is quite the guy but umm, it's fun!" cutting off matteo, valencia spoke grittedly through her teeth, making her new boyfriend sound anything but amazing just like she could so easily do with spencer, especially considering the relationship was so new and that could have been the reason why valencia was kind of selling her new boyfriend so short, she didn't want to hype him up too early

"okay, okay, not that long but, have you guys said the l word to each other yet?" spencer played up his romantic and excited voice that he'd hear the girls do a lot as matteo awkwardly laughed again, as did valencia as matteo at this point just turned around and hoiked himself up into the car and shut the door - spencer recognising that maybe something wasn't right but, like before, didn't push it further

"well, i...i have said it but, matteo, i think is just waiting for the right moment, ya know? maybe he just isn't ready yet as he did have a bad breakup before meeting me so, yeah..." valencia nodded her head with a smile, hoping to convince herself that she had nothing to worry about as her team also nodded their heads, with some scepticism about matteo - just because you're a profiler, doesn't necesarily mean you're a good liar!

valencia and her team continue to talk a little bit longer before it became obvious that poor old matteo was tired and wanted to sleep. so, they started to farewell one another since it was now way past all of their collective bedtimes and if they didn't leave now, they'd be sleeping in their cars and that wasn't a pretty sight for the rest of the fbi units to wake up to in the morning. hoisting herself into her suv, valencia started up the car and drove out of the parking garage with her now sleeping boyfriend in the passenger seat, en route back to her apartment to get at least an hour or hopefully three of some shut eye before having to be called back in the next morning.

driving back to his own apartment, spencer couldn't help but remember how happy he was with valencia. valencia made spencer so much happier which was what made it tricky for him to understand how someone like matteo made valencia happier than spencer did. to spencer and the rest of the team, it seemed as if matteo was trouble and it worried them sick and they hadn't even known him a full day yet. worried them to the point where they thought that he might be an abusive boyfriend or if not now, will eventually get to that point.

ain't nobody hurt you like i hurt you, but ain't nobody need you like i do. 

throughout the next couple of cases, spencer made sure to keep his eyes on valencia but especially matteo. he had started to get heavily involved in wanting to help valencia and the team to the point where he wasn't showing up to his own workplace at the community college hospital. it was obvious that matteo was becoming jealous of his girlfriend's job and was trying to take over every aspect of not just her worklife but her personal life as well. she couldn't spend time outside of time with matteo, and if she did, it had to be in a public place where matteo could keep tabs on her and could pull her out of the catch-up whenever he saw fit or felt like there was a problem. if anything, matteo was being way more paranoid than any of the fbi agents and bau team were and those guys were highly paranoid and self-aware of their surroundings. but, matteo's paranoia and selfwareness was now getting out of hand and forcing valencia to be isolated, even at work where she'd usually get to escape from her home life and her boyfriend but, nope, not when you're dating matteo de la costa ladies and gentleman! spencer wanted to keep his eyes mainly on valencia as he wanted to make sure he was safe and that matteo had at least at some point relaxed on his paranoia and that he wouldn't try anything sneaky to hurt her. but, it was also because spencer still needs her. spencer still felt like he had so much more to give to valencia, no longer caring if it would be dangerous and potentionally causes a life or death situation, way more than matteo would be able to give anyway. especially considering how matteo just looked like he was bad news when you first make eye contact with the guy.

it was coming towards the end of another long case. an overkill of stabbing and rape case in new jersey and it looked as if everyone could read valencia's mind and her teary eyes and what was to come next.

the case had reminded valencia of the very case that caused her and spencer to break up in the first place. also in new jersey, the team had travelled over there for a completely different case only to be dealing with a stap and a rape case before the unsub, who had a previous connection to valencia, kidnapped her and only just grazed her with their carving knife, not getting the time to fully finish the stap and rape because her team got there just in time to catch the unsub. whilst getting checked out by emt's, valencia rested on the bumper of the ambulance and spencer forced himself to walk over to his girlfriend who was about to have a conversation with the grim reaper but narrowly missed. and it was in that moment that spencer knew that whilst he'd always love valencia for now and forever, he couldn't risk their love and being together if he was always so paranoid of having to watch the love of his life be killed in front of him purely because she's an access point of weakness and vulnerability of spencer to unsubs, particularly the ones he's had prior connections with. on the last few write ups the team had, it looked as though spencer was on the verge of tears if valencia looked closely enough. it broke her heart, she hated the amount of pain she and spencer's break up put on him, even though it was a mutual breakup, that still didn't take away the pain that the both of them felt over it ending.

valencia just wished she never gave it up with spencer, even if it did mean constantly being paranoid that they could lose each other due to an unsub connected to either one of them, even though some part of her loved matteo and she was glad she was dating him, she had been thinking a lot lately of the what if's about her and spencer.

and then suddenly, completely out of nowhere, valencia started crying when she and spencer made eye contact after taking a quick break from writing their reports. spencer wished he hadn't of made valencia cry but, at the same token, he was glad it wasn't him that was crying this time otherwise, he knew how bad that would have made valencia feel. she had then gone to turn around to see if matteo had any tissues since, even through paperwork and reports, he was inserting himself into his girlfriend's job but, found out that no one was next to her and he was nowhere to be seen.

for a moment, it freaked her out, not knowing where her boyfriend had gone but, thankfully, spencer came to her rescue and handed her a tissue before going back to his desk and his report. valencia was now back to thinking about whether or not it was a smart idea to bring matteo and tell him about her job since he was now taking over her job and it also got her thinking about if she really did love him or if he actually loved her. or, if he was like spencer and the rest of the team thought, was just an abuser and a troublemaker.

i know there's others that deserve you but darling i am still in love with you. 

it didn't take rocket science for the rest of the team to figure out why valencia was crying and that spencer was focusing too much on valencia whilst still knowing he was still head over heels in love with her. whilst it was obvious to valencia and his teammates, it was shockingly something that matteo never noticed, skimming right over his head due to his own paranoia and self-awareness, he had no idea at the way spencer paid more attention to valencia. even though spencer knew that there were others that deserved valencia like he promised her, he still found it difficult to comprehend that she did move on because at the time they made that promise, they were both unaware of how quickly valencia would move on after the breakup.

and finally, at just after midnight, all of the team had finished their paperwork and had all offered, once again, to walk valencia down to her car where they once again, saw a slightly hungover matteo waiting at the hood of the car. it was moments like these that it became clear to valencia that maybe, falling in love with matteo was bad news...dangerous even. however, she still desperately tried hard to hide the newfound fear that arose in her as matteo's paranoia would cause him to be mean and very heavyhanded.

*

but i guess you look happier, you do. my friends told me one day i'll feel it too. 

but, just before valencia stepped into her car where matteo was waiting, she stepped back out of the car and walked the step destination to spencer. during that moment, matteo too stepped out of the car, seeming like there was an important conversation he needed to have with his girlfriend as valencia and spencer continued to walk further towards spencer's car, creating some distance between them and matteo.

"...val, can i please...have a second just to speak to you? it's serious and it can't really wait--"

skidding to a halt, valencia turned around to face her boyfriend, her face red as heavy breaths left her mouth, "--oh, sorry matteo but, i need to have a chat with spence about some work related stuff that's confidential and not for you to hear. we'll be very quick, i promise, can we talk about this another night? we can talk later, i promise!" valencia quickly interjected as, to be honest, she was wanting to speak to spencer to get away from matteo who rolled his eyes before standing down and walking back over to valencia's car

"oh, darling, of course, you can! go, have your chat with spencer, i'll just be over at the car, okay? i love you, princess!" matteo smiled, giving valencia a kiss making her squeal that he finally told her he loved her - okay, maybe he wasn't so bad after all and she ran like a little kid as she and spencer locked eyes again

"thanks, matteo! i love youuu!" valencia squeals out as she then jogs back over and sees spencer outside of his car, the two of them locking eyes 

as music from both cars started playing through their opened windows, valencia pulled spencer in for a hug before pulling away, "hey..." valencia trailed off as she giggled as spencer held her tightly, the both of them slipping behind the car as he spins the both of them around in a circle, something they hadn't done since their split

"...hi," spencer whispered back before in another short breath, whispered, "you know, i've missed doing cases with you without matteo being involved in them," he whispered again, softly placing valencia back on the ground as she giggled softly, lifting her head up, placing a loose strand of hair behind her ear

"i have as well...and, oh my god, you did amazing during that case! you figured out all the puzzle pieces so goddamn quickly, i could barely keep up with you! oh, also, matteo told me as well that he thought you guys did a great job as well..." it was obvious to spencer that valencia was lying - again, just because you're an amazing profiler, doesn't make you a good liar!

but that didn't make spencer mad, it made him worry as there were little tells that she started to do whenever she mentioned matteo and it was a lie. and, all of this hesitation and lying from valencia made spencer suspicious and think that maybe it was because valencia's scared of matteo but was at the same time so blinded by her love and infatuation for him that she finds her hesitation and lies when she's around him or speaking about him to be normal. seeing this and now after constantly being around matteo since first meeting him, this was now also scaring spencer as much as it was potentially scaring valencia.

"oh, thank you, valencia! i'm so glad that both you and matteo thought that! wait, where did he go, wasn't he just waiting in your car..."spencer asked in confusion as valencia turned to notice that he was right, matteo was no longer in her suv and due to how dark it was since it was way after midnight, it was scary not knowing where her boyfriend was

"...oh, umm, i don't know but it doesn't matter because it just gives us a longer time to chat to each other without him being the background just watching," valencia smiles, her nerves going away as spencer felt sick in his stomach

"okay cool, umm, because it's so cold, do...do you wanna sit in my car for a bit until matteo comes back?" spencer's skin started to crawl, why was matteo acting so shady and possessive over valencia

"can we please?" valencia asked as spencer wasted no more time in unlocking his car as the two of them entered his car and sat together and waited for matteo to return back to valencia's car as spencer tried not to think too much of the situation as once again, like his friends said, one day, spencer would feel the same joy that valencia's found with matteo and that one day soon, spencer is also going to move on

i could smile to hide the truth but i know i was happier with you. 

it was around one am when matteo finally came staggering out of the pub across the street from the fbi building and back to valencia's car. which meant that it was hometime and valencia was once again stuck with matteo being hungover and very unpredictable and began to touch her inappropriately. but, just like spencer had been doing the entire time, valencia was smiling to hide away the truth of how she truly felt. obviously, because he was still there, and spencer didn't want to leave first until valencia and matteo did, matteo joined the last part of their conversation. and it was uncomfortable, for both spencer and valencia because matteo was being blunt, rude, possessive, hungover but he was also trying to cover it up and justifying it by saying he was just being protective of his girlfriend.

"...so, sam, you dated valencia for a brief period of time, how long was it?" matteo, once again called spencer by the wrong name as he asked in a sloppy tone of voice which grossed out valencia and spencer, she had never seen matteo be so crude but assumed it was due to the alcohol and because he was curious since it wasn't the first time he had asked

fighting the urge to roll his eyes, spencer sighed, "it's spencer and yes, i did, valencia and i dated for three years, three months and three days..." the boy wonder corrected the inebriated man as he smiled a small smile, hoping that his feelings were being hidden away and not so obvious

"...hmm...three years...three months...and three days...is...is that what i have to beat baby doll?" matteo slurred as she started to nonconsensually kiss valencia's neck as she nervously gulped, trying to grab his face to get him to stop as spencer watched on in anger and worry

"yes matteo, three years, three months and three days and, i won't lie when i say those three years, three months and three days were bloody fucking fantastic. it was just the worry and a safety thing because of our job that killed us so it was the right person wrong time so i have no idea, maybe you and i could get to three years or even beat it, matteo. however, we are still yet to get to a month so, be patient darling okay, be patient!" valencia spoke with a slight tone in her voice as she smiled, trying her hardest to act all lovey-dovey around him when she was uncomfortable, especially with the few drinks he was influenced by

"mmmkay babyy..." matteo slurred out again as he started to feel his hands around valencia yet again, the girl laughing uncomfortably, trying to hide the very noticeable fear in her eyes and body language even though she was in love with matteo - noncensensual touching was still not okay if you were dating the person

"i love you, matteo, i really do but, we don't touch me like this when we're around other people, okay? that's for our personal private times, got it?" the girl spoke through gritted teeth again, slapping matteo's hand away as the man started to sober up and nodded his head

"okay baby, let's leave then, we can catch up with your friend/ex-boyfriend tomorrow at work! i still have something i need to tell you, remember?" matteo whispered as valencia nodded her head, whispering back to him asking if she could just say one final goodbye to spencer, nodding his head, matteo released his arms from valencia's waist and waited inside the car

situating himself into the car, matteo didn't argue and allowed the exes to have one final goodbye. valencia smiled again as she went back over to spencer to say her goodbyes since the rest of their team had since long gone by this point. they both smiled as they hugged and chatted a little more. valencia and spencer were finally alone again and valencia just smiled and went on her tippy toes as she pulled him in for a hug.

"thanks for helping me during the case today, spence. i truly thought we'd be going home without any answers or any arrests, i think it was also really good for matteo to see how i work and what my job does and for him to meet you guys. it seems as if he's truly interested but, i'll make sure he doesn't always insert himself into whatever case we're doing so, once again, apologies for that. but yeah, it's nice being back at work with you and the rest of the team and yeah, see you tomorrow, same place, same time..." valencia was about to leave when she paused and turned back around

"...i...umm, i know how hard it was for you to see me with matteo and the fact that i have moved on but, i'll always and i mean always love you spence. those three years, three months and three days we were together were truthfully and honestly the best fucking time ever but, i'm with matteo now and, i am glad you're okay with it..." valencia paused again as spencer nodded his head with a small smile on his face, he truthfully was glad she was happy again even though he did have some slight suspicions about the guy alongside the rest of their team who also had suspicions

"...okay, i really have to go now but, i love you loads spence and, i'll see you tomorrow for the next case that i'm sure is going to be even more gruesome than the last two we've had..." valencia blabbed out as she smiled and kissed spencer's cheek, his cheeks flushing a bright pink as he smiled back, his hand slightly grazing his cheek as valencia walked away to her car  

"...yeah, i...i need to go too and yes, you will see me tomorrow for the next case...i love you more..." spencer trailed off as he grazed his cheek that valencia kissed as he sighed - valencia really was in with matteo, she was really happy with him

baby, you look happier you do, i knew one day you'd fall for someone new. 

one month later, it seemed as if valencia and matteo were still dating... that is, what people who saw valencia's personal instagram account thought that is.

liked by matteodelacosta, drsreid, aaronhotchner, penelopegarcia, derekmorgan, emilyprentiss and 100 others

valenciacallahan just a girl and her mans 🤍

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matteodelacosta love you baby!

drsreid so cute you two!

aaronhotchner you two having a nice vacation?

penelopegarcia oh aren't you guys just cute?

derekmorgan we need you back with us pretty girl! we're struggling without your intelligence, pretty boy's isn't enough!

emilyprentiss you have a tattoo?

however though, as most people are aware, not everything that you see online is real and picture-perfect. recently, matteo and valencia were arguing and fighting like crazy. but it wasn't like valencia had done anything wrong, it was just something that had spiralled out of control after matteo had forced valencia to take yet another vacation during a huge string of difficult cases and arguements that he would start. unfortunately, as spencer and the rest of the team, unfortunately, guessed and suspected would happen, matteo was now dangerous and abusive. matteo was so abusive that he would punch walls, merely inches from missing valencia's face each time.

"...matt...matteo, babe, please...please stop! what...what did i do wrong? just...just tell me and i...i can fix it! just...i...i need to get to work!" valencia squeals out, curling up agaisnt the wall and mere inches from where matteo's hand was close to punching her

"stop talking with and seeing that sam guy! it's him that is causing this trouble! DO YOU NOT SEE THE WAY HE LOOKS AT YOU WHEN YOU ARE TOGETHER?!" matteo suddenly raises his voice which makes valencia mad - how dare he say shit about spencer when spencer hadn't done anything wrong

"matteo de la costa! his name is spencer and he has done nothing wrong. the two of us have been friends since we were children and we work together. yes, he's going to look at me in a certain way because we dated for three bloody years and we're best friends and work colleagues but, i means anything but what you think it means because i'm with you and because i love you...not...hot him..." valencia hesitates towards the end as fear surges through her but, it was too late, matteo was mad and his paranoia all the way up to a hundred

"NO VALENCIA, YOU DON'T LOVE ME! YOU NEVER HAVE AND YOU NEVER WILL! YOU HAVE LOVED SPENCER THIS ENTIRE TIME, YOU TALK ABOUT HIM LIKE YOU'D RATHER BE WITH HIM THAN ME!" matteo screams, throwing another punch at the wall, again merely missing valencia by an inch but valencia smiles at the fact he finally got spencer's name right

"FINE! YOU GOT ME MATTEO! I DO LOVE SPENCER AND I STILL DO, I NEVER STOPPED LOVING HIM BECAUSE THE SAFETY OF US BEING TOGETHER WITH THIS DANGEROUS JOB WAS ALWAYS IN THE WAY. WHICH WAS THE REASON WE BROKE UP IN THE FIRST PLACE, NOT BECAUSE WE STOPPED LOVING EACH OTHER! YES, I ADMIT, I TALK ABOUT SPENCER LIKE I'D RATHER SPEND TIME WITH HIM OVER YOU BECAUSE I WOULD RATHER SPEND MY TIME DOING ANYTHING BUT BE SEEN WITH YOU! YOU CONSTANTLY INTERFER WITH MY JOB WHEN ME AND MY TEAM ARE TRYING TO WORK, YOU ARE CONSTANTLY PARANOID FOR NO REASON BECAUSE YOU'RE MEANT TO BE A NURSING STUDENT IN DOWNTOWN VIGIRINA YET YOU ALWAYS SEEM TO FIND A WAY TO FIND ME WHEREVER IT IS I'M DOING A CASE AND YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO INSERT YOURSELF INTO IT FOR NO REASON! SPENCER HAS ALWAYS TREATED ME RIGHT WHEN WE WERE BEST FRIENDS AND WHEN WE DATED! HE'S THE BEST MAN EVER AND I--" just before valencia could continue or pause to defend herself since she was all dressed and ready for the newest case they had been called in for, matteo went crazy and picked up a glass vase

because, the moment valencia realised that matteo had picked up the glass vase, it was too late. matteo had thrown the glass vase and it had struck valencia in the head, causing her to wobble back, smashing into the wall behind her.

she fell unconscious as she slid from the wall to the ground almost lifelessly, blood pouring from the back of her head, the glass that was on the ground now cutting into her skin, causing even more blood to trickle its way down the unconscious valencia's paling body. matteo didn't even stop to realise what he did wrong in his paranoid state and sprinted out of the house just as spencer was walking in because valencia hadn't shown up to work at the right time after matteo would give him that permission for the sake of keeping his girlfriend happy - not because he liked spencer.

matteo didn't even react to the fact that he had just injured his girlfriend until he heard spencer's voice that he had so very familiarised from the boy wonder and his eyes widened as the nursing student sprinted from the house.

"...matteo? are you alright? have you seen val, she was late for wor...oh my god, valencia!" spencer jolted back slightly as matteo ran past him, hitting the agent on his shoulder, his eyes widening the moment he noticed the scene in front of him

grabbing his phone from his pocket, spencer wasted no second in dialling 911 for an ambulance and police after he sent the code word to his team members after the team had created it for the situation of one of their own being in an abusive relationship, never thinking they'd need to use it, "...no, no, no, val, valencia! ahh, crap....come on, pick up, pick up! please help me!" spencer was hysterical within seconds of the 911 operater picking up his phone call

with all the possible information that was obvious from just the scene in front of him, spencer gave it all to the dispatcher who then sent out the ambulance and police vehicle with lights and sirens flashing and blaring. thanking the female dispatcher, ending the call since he could hear the sirens coming down the street, spencer threw his phone to the ground, the phone just stopping before it fell into one of the few puddles of blood as he then leant his back against the wall where valencia was and picked her up, cradling her in his lap.

she was wearing her typical work uniform, her tight v-neck long sleeve, dress pants, her belt, her gun and fbi credentials clipped to the side of her belt and block high heels. swaying the both of them lightly from side to side, spencer tried to keep the both of them calm and valencia as awake as possible as the sirens halted sound as did the flashing lights, meaning the paramedics and police had arrived but the rest of his team were still on their way.

"...cmon val, it's okay darling. just keep your pretty eyes open, it's spence, you're safe..." spencer whispered in a soft, surprisingly calm tone of voice as valencia suddenly squirmed before calming down from the pain of her injury and the fact that she was safe and it was spencer holding her, matteo nowhere to be found

"what...what happened? did...did matteo hit me?" groggy, valencia attempted to ask what had happened, well wanting to know if what happened did happen and she wasn't dreaming as spencer gave a small smile

"yeah babe, matteo hit you. that and he threw a glass vase at your head which caused you to fall back into the wall...but it's okay, matteo's gone and i'm here and the paramedics and police are just walking in and the rest of our team should be arriving shortly as wel, okay, you're safe," spencer stayed calm as valencia nodded her head as best as she could which made spencer relax a little better

immediately, the paramedics went over to check on valencia, both paramedics and police knowing that she was a federal agent as spencer stood up and slipped behind them so as not to be in the way. he felt tears well in his eyes as he watched his best friend get prodded and poked and sked so many questions that the poor thing could barely keep up with their questions.

"...agent callahan, darling, can you please let us help you? my name is sammy and this is angel, we're paramedics and we are here to help you and to treat your injuries..." sammy, the male paramedic repeated for a second to valencia who was slipping between awake and sleep

"...am i okay? where...where's spence?" valencia panicked, no longer about to see spencer as sammy and angel decided that they needed to work quickly and to keep valencia as repsonive for as long as they possibly could

"valencia, spencer is still here, he's just talking to the police, and yes, you are okay, you've just got a head injury and small non-fatal lacerations scattered across your upper body, arms and legs. your head injury is our biggest concern so, could you please tel us your name and your fbi credentials, even though we already know it?" angel then asks as valencia blinks, thinking for a moment but it seemed as if nothing was registering in her mind other than spencer

"uh...umm...i...my..." the first and second try she doesn't get it but, by the third try, she manages to mumble her name and fbi credentials out

"...val...valencia...my name is valencia, i'm...i'm twenty-four and i'm a supervisory special agent with the fbi's behavourial analysis unit and my...my boyfriend matteo de la costa and i got into an arguement before i was supposed to leave for a new case for work and he...he hit me a couple of times after threatening too and then he...he picked up the glass vase and hit me over the head with it as i then fell back, hitting my head again on the wall..." valencia wangles out as the paramedics and spencer, who was teary-eyed, smiled in shock with widened eyes as they listened to valencia remember every single detail of the accident

spencer could barely deal with the unsubs or random strangers treating valencia with that much disrespect but, it shocked him so much more that it was matteo because he was supposedly in love with her and he trusted matteo to take care of her and he didn't.

"...well done, valencia. thank you for the information..." sammy thanked as valencia smiled in return when sammy's attention went back to angel

"...angel, i think the only thing we can do is just get agent callahan into the ambulance and to the hospital, she is back and forth from consciousness even though she does remember her name, her fbi credentials and what happened, there's still a chance that something bad could happen..." sammy concluded as angel agreed straight away, sammy moving forward and picking up valencia in his arms, carrying her bridal style towards the stretcher as they then proceed to wheel her out to the ambulance

spencer then quickly followed after them into the ambulance, obviously his last thought on the glass shards on the floor and the fact he was covered in his ex-girlfriend/coworkers blood, sammy closed the back of the ambulance before jumping into the front seat, flooring down the street to the nearest hospital as angel and spencer sat in the back with valencia.

"...agent reid, if you could, please let agent hotchner, know that he and the rest of the team needs to meet us at the mary washington hospital, it's the closest one," angel spoke up as she continued to monitor valencia's vitals, spencer nodding his head as he immediately grabs his phone and rings hotch

hotch

"hey, hotch, could you and the team meet valencia and me at mary washington hospital, please instead of valencia's apartment?" 

"of course, you guys safely in the ambulance? what about de la costa?"

"have the police found him?" 

"yes, we're safe and in the ambulance. and, about de la costa, we have no idea. we haven't been given any information regarding the police's search for him. but my guess is he just ran for it because i was entering when he was leaving and it was clear he was leaving in a rush. he legged it when i noticed what had happened and didn't have time to run after him and take care of valencia. i walked in further to see that matteo had hit valencia over the head with a glass vase, she couldn't move out of the way quickly enough it seemed. now, i don't exactly know what they were fighting about since i didn't hear it but, the police did take witness statements from neighbours. all i can say is that they were definitely fighting again."

"again? jesus christ, how many more times are they going to fight and she's not going to do something about it? i feel so awful for her, callahan doesn't deserve this!"

"how far away are you guys from the hospital in the ambulance? myself, morgan and prentiss are five minutes away and rossi, jareau and garcia are about ten minutes away"

"the ambulance is like three minutes away hotch, meet me in waiting room three! the hospital with place her in the icu considering it's a head injury!"

"oh you best be there in three, we'll all be there in two! stay safe and, spencer, stay calm, valencia is a strong girl and matteo, the fucker, is going to pay for this!"

"thank you hotch, i'll see you and the team in waiting room three!"

the call between hotch and reid has been disconnected. 

spencer now felt less agitated knowing that when he got to the hospital, his team were also going to be there as well. knowing he wasn't going to be alone really gave spencer some comfort as he now just had to deal with the thought that the person that he thought loved his best friend and ex-girlfriend would even think to do this to her, not just this once but all the countless other times that he and the team suspected he was abusing her.

from what spencer saw of matteo and heard of him, he could be really kind, funny, enthusiastic, sarcastic, an amazing nursing student, a bit of a jerk and petty when he purposefully would eiter misprounounce of call someone by the wrong name, pretty possessive when drunk and constantly try to self-insert himself into the bau whilst they were working on a case, overall, he was a great guy. sure, as mentioned, he did make some uncomfortable and inexcusable comments when drunk and when he'd insert himself to the bau but, maybe valencia got uncomfortable due to never seeing it before those times it did happen when she first introduced her team to matteo. matteo isn't a bad guy, right...right?

*

a couple of weeks go by since valencia was first brought into the hospital by ambulance when she was starting to regain full consciousness again. after many ct scans and x-rays, it had been ruled out that valencia's memory or head injurt was not a serious concern anymore, she was moved out of the icu and into a regular room on the first floor. all she needed was regular pain medication to stop any internal and external swelling.

the entire time that supervisory special agent valencia callahan was confined to her icu room in the hospital, spencer and the rest of the bau were there also. strauss had been asked to give the rest of their impending cases to other units in the bureau until valencia was released and cleared from the hospital. they never actually wanted to leave due to the heavy risk of matteo coming in and attempting to apologise for what he did so, they never left and the hospital staff and unit section chief erin strauss allowed it. for a while, especially at the beginning of valencia's time at the hospital, just the mention of matteo's name between her team members would make valencia stress out which would then cause trauma to her head injury which was something they were heavily trying to avoid.

valencia was beyond grateful to spencer and the rest of her bau family for never leaving her bedside and staying in her room with her. she was grateful because it made her feel safe in knowing that with her team with her, matteo couldn't get to her and they weren't ever going to leave her side, no matter who she chose to fall in love with or out of love with. even if she only started to realise it now, in a hospital bed as well-respected, well-acclaimed federal agent, in a hospital bed out of the icu that she was with the wrong person.

"...spence..." valencia mumbled, filling out the silence as she had just finished some testing which caused her to be a little drugged and groggy, spencer smiled at hearing his name

"...yeah, what's up, valencia?" spencer responded softly, quickly turning to face her again as he grabbed her hand to hold, making the drowsy agent smile at the connection

"was...were the police actually able to find out what happened? what did matteo and i actually fight about?" valencia questioned, shocking spencer as since the accident, spencer and the team had been quite apprehensive about telling the full story what what matteo did since for some reason, maybe due to a trauma response that spencer would totally knew the ins and outs of, valencia could remember everything else about what happened but the actual fight that led. upto her injuries

and the reason being was that, a couple of days after being transferred to the hospital, spencer recieved a phone call from the police that had been dispatched out on his 911 call and told him that they not only had found and apprehended matteo de la costa but his statement of events lined up basically identically to every single one of the witness statements from the surrounding neighbouring apartments who had heard the two of the them fighting. and, now, valencia wanted to be told? this worried everyone but no one was more worried than spencer himself was.

"val...valencia, are you sure you want me to tell you? what he did was horrific..." spencer trailed off, fighting back his own tears as valencia slowly nodded her head yes

seeing the head nod, spencer breathed in as the rest of the team, even hotch and rossi, braced themselves as spencer was the only one to be given that follow up phone call with the information from the police.

"...please, spence. i...i wanna know and i'm ready, besides, i deserve to know, don't i?" valencia was certain that she wanted to know and she made it clear, spencer nodded his head as he then held his hand out for his best friend to hold, which she reciprocated straight away

"...okay, umm, just to preface this, this is what i was told by the police and what they were told by him and the witnesses that heard it..." however, it seemed as though spencer no longer needed to tell the story since whatever trauma response was blocking valencia from remembering before was gone and she remembered

her eyes widened as she squeezed spencer's hand tighter, "...i...oh my god...i remember what we were fighting over!" she called out, making spencer turn his head up again, in a bit of shock but a little bit glad since that was the one thing the police were a bit iffy about telling him

"what was the fight over, callahan?" hotchner speaks up, spencer not able to as the rest of the team all nervously awaited to hear. it,not expecting to be told what valencia was about to tell them

valencia never imagined she'd be embarrassed saying this but she was, making eye contract with spencer, "it...the fight was over you, spence..." the injured agent then turned her head back down to her hands that rested in the hospital sheets as spencer sat in shock, the fight was over him?

"...it...the fight was over me?" spencer could feel his breathing pick up as valencia nodded her head slowly as she continued the story further, remembering other things that spencer had already been told by the police that the team were hearing for the first time

"mhm, it was because i couldn't stop talking about you and the team to matteo. he...he must have thought i was cheating on him and that we were dating behind his back or something, his paranoia clearly the highest it's ever been and, he...he told me to stop talking about you as he then started to talk crap about you..." valencia paused as spencer's jaw tensed up as he gulped down some saliva that he was almost about to choke on

the rest of the team were listening in pure shock, "....i, of course, defended you, saying you look at me the way you because you did date for three years, we work together and that we are still best friends, so i didn't take any care at how you looked at me as that's how you have always looked at me, even as kids before we dated. i told matteo i loved him, though it was with hesitation and i think that's what made him even madder as that was when he started to yell, saying that i didn't love him and that i...that i still loved you, spence..." the drowsy agent trailed off again as she licked her lips as she continued, spencer lightly caressing her hand in comfort with his thumb

"...and, that...was when i said it. i shouted it actually, telling him that he was correct...i...i do still love you, spence. i *sigh* i never stopped loving you spence, i seriously didn't, even when it became dangerous to keep on loving you. i then explained to matteo that the reason why we broke up was because of our jobs and how dangerous it would have been if we stayed together and the fear of having something bad happening to one of us, not that we didn't love each other and that i talk about you so much because you are incredible spence, you truly are!" once again, valencia paused so she could catch her breath and take a gulp of water before continuing, spencer remaining engaged and listening, the rest of the team in silent shock but slight joy

"i then continued on saying how you always treated me right, not just when we dated but as best friends and work colleagues and, i know i shouldn't have but, it was all i could think to say. and that was what drove him over edge but i just kept on going and kept on egging him on and pushing him by saying how much of an amazing person you are when he just couldn't handle it anymore and...and then he picked up the glass vase and he threw it at me...and i didn't realise he had thrown it until it was too late and bam, it hit me right in the back of the head and i just, fell and slid down the wall, the shards of glass underneath me just cutting into me..." valencia trailed off, most especially after mentioning that she was still in love with spencer, even after she had convinced herself that she had moved on from her best friend and that it was safer to not date him even when she hadn't ever really planned to do that

this quite obviously caught spencer breathless as he tried to form a coherent sentence, "...val...valencia, you...still love me?" he stammered out as the drowsy, medically drugged-up agent nodded her head as her lip quivered

"oh my gosh, spencer, yes! matteo broke my heart, maybe even more than my heart actually and i should have known! spence, this wasn't the first fight matteo and i had had! it was maybe at least the tenth or something crazy stupid like that. those photos of us on my instagram post when we were supposed to be on vaction were taken ages ago which was before i even introduced you guys to him during those cases that he inserted himself into. as soon as the cases started getting longer and more gruesome, causing me to be away from matteo more and more, we had just hit breaking point, matteo and i. it was always, always matteo accusing me of something, never me accusing him because i stupidly trusted and loved him enough to think that he wouldn't hurt me or break my heart because he wouldn't get hurt since he wasn't apart of the fbi. yet i've still ended up in the hospital without even needing to get hurt during a case which is just as worse as getting injured during a case by an unsub. i...i am so sorry i never told you or confirmed your guys' suspicions, i...i was just scared, so scared that matteo would hurt me if he found out i was trying to ask you guys for help or for a way out," valencia trailed off, a small single tear escaping from the corner of her eye to her cheek, spencer wiping it away

and if he breaks your heart like lovers do, just know that i'll be waiting here, for you

spencer and valencia sat in silence with one another just staring at each other, consoling one another and wiping away each other's tears. the team watching on saw the love and infatuation, the same one they always had for each other, spark all over again as if it never faded. valencia never stopped loving spencer, she was just waiting for the right time for them to be safe again so she and spencer could met back up again at the perfect roadblock and start from where they had left off.

and that's actually what they ended up doing and, it was like love at first sight again for the. twoof them. that was, after hotch had given them both permission to date one another again since it was no longer a safety issue for them to date again.

"...i love, valencia, i never stopped loving you..."

"...i love you too, spence, i never stopped loving you either!"

six months later

liked by drsreid, derekmorgan, katerinacallahanvasquez, emilyprentiss, aaronhotchner, penelopegarcia and 100 others

valenciacallahan can someone please tell my sister and brother-in-law to stop copying me and spence's poses please? congratulations to mr and mrs noah and katerina callahan vasquez, spence and i send our love and best wishes for your guys' new marriage 🤍

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drsreid the audacity your sister and brother-in-law have to steal our poses! seriously though, congrats noah and katerina, we love you so much and wish the best for your guys' marriage 🤍

derekmorgan congratulations katerina and noah! i'm so glad that pretty boy and pretty girl got to go back home to be at the wedding!

katerinacallahanvasquez blame the photographer! they chose the pose not us! but thank you sissy, noah and i love you and spencer too! and hopefully, the next wedding is your guys' ;)

emilyprentiss awe, congratulations to katerina and noah! so glad you guys could actually be at their wedding 🤍

aaronhotchner congratulations katerina and noah! glad to see that you and spencer took the vaction days 🤍

penelopegarcia awe, this is gorgeous! congrats to katerina and noah! hopefully the next wedding is you and spencer's, val 🤍

and if he breaks your heart like lovers do, just know that i'll be waiting here, for you and he was waiting there for her and, spencer finally got his girl back safe and sound whilst still able to keep their jobs as fbi agents with the behavioural analysis unit. no longer worrying if they'd be targeted by unsubs with personal vendettas against them.

- - - 

rewriting this for dr spencer reid was so much fun and i kinda wish i continued further but maybe that just calls for a part two ;).

ok ily bye xx

wc; 13455

[izzy-b-hands]

For that fmk thing: my fave obscure mr robot characters ... drunk santa dude, that one dark army member who is always eating a hamburger, and earl from south dakota? Alternatively, elliot, leon, or dom?

A quick reference because I reblogged so much stuff today lol; this is the post in question for anyone seeing this and wondering abt it: https://aboutthatmelancholystorm.tumblr.com/post/189331467366/we-played-the-fanfiction-trope-version-of-fuck

Slow Burn/Fake Date/Enemies to Lovers are my options, and god am I glad you sent this because I was dying to do this one

and I’m gonna do both sets here, so for the Obscure Mr Robot Characters: 

Fake Date-drunk santa dude. He would be on Slow Burn, but he’s got a wife that he clearly loves a lot, and I could never wreck that sort of love. But I would happily play along as Potential Mx. Claus if he and I fell into a plot that needed it!

Enemies to Lovers-Earl from SD. He is from the Enemy Dakota, and much like Romeo and Juliet our love would be forbidden; one from NoDak and the other SoDak in the shitty Midwest where we lay our scene. We could eventually bond over realizing that neither Dakota is very good at all lol. 

Slow Burn-that leaves Dark Army Hamburger man on slow burn. We have seventy hamburger meal dates at a diner before we even learn each other’s name. The slowest of all slow burns. The fic would require not just multiple chapters, but parts one, two, three, possibly up to seven. 

Now, for our main characters!

Fake Date-Dom. In the theory of the show, this one is both interesting and funny because I would see it in a plot as her working Dark Army, myself Fsociety, but neither one of us knows it until well into a good few episodes (because I can’t see Sam revealing a twist like that right away.) Does it end in something tragic as a result? Hopefully not, but tbh if I put Sam in charge of that script, I imagine it would somehow.

Enemies to Lovers-Leon. I put Leon here only because as much as I love his character, I have a feeling I would irritate the shit out of him initially lol. I think it would take time hanging out (or forced to spend time together for whatever reason) and getting to know each other before a story arc could be worked out where things would click into place. 

Slow Burn-Elliot. My sweet, tired boy, who unfortunately is just like me. Which means we’re both depressed and anxious as shit, and struggling with lots of random stuff internally and externally. Which means by the time either of us realizes there are feelings and wants to make a move, we both might chicken out a good four times before actually making said move, not to mention finding time to spend together without other stuff hanging over our heads. This is another Slow Burn fic of many chapters. If on the show, it would leave the audience wondering if Sam ever intended on finishing the arc between our characters, which I like to think he would, hopefully happily. I’m not saying I would beg him to end it happily, but I am absolutely saying that. Ideally, the last episode ends with Elliot safe and happy, hanging out at my apartment (and god what a dream that I could have my own apartment. I know it would be fake, for the show, but still though) with me making him knoephla soup, the soup which is basically a hug with dough in it. 

Thank you for asking!!! This was fun, and cheered me up as I sit and try and forget I have to spend tomorrow with family.