#and she was like ‘so do you believe in symbolism in dreams?’ i said ‘i don’t believe in prophetic dreams and i don’t believe that dreams

[fingertipsmp3]

So me and my friend unpacked that night terror I had the other night & basically I am now on a self-imposed horror ban because I genuinely think if I keep consuming horror with my current mental state I will have a full-blown psychotic break 😔✌🏻

[venerawrites]

Vi reuniting with her significant-other after prison? The reader could be a mercenary, or a firelight, a baker, an artist(music and paint) just to name a few occupations they could have. I am not used to requesting, so please forgive me.

author's note: I think this request is so cute, I really loved doing it! I tis a bit angsty in the beginning, but it is fluffy at the end! <3 Thank you so much for requesting and I hope you enjoy! x

Nature always finds a way.

Even when surrounded by nothing but a cold, grey concrete, it managed to give birth to life.

Hope.

As she leaned against the wall, Vi gazed upon the big tree in front of her, focusing her attention on the gentle dance of the green leaves. Of course, she has seen trees before, in Piltover and on photographs, but never in Zaun.

In a way, she was both surprised and impressed with Ekko finding this place. She always thought she knew the city like the back of her hand, yet she had never stumbled over here. How many places were like that in the Undercity? How many places remained hidden, waiting to become a symbol of a new beginning?

"Your mind seems far away", a voice sounded next to her and Vi turned to her right, only to find Caitlyn's smiling face. Despite her gentle expression, there was a spark of worry in her eyes.

Interesting girl was she. One who has grown up in a closed bubble, protected by her family's money and influence, yet there was a fire inside of her, that made her different from the stereotypical Piltover person. She had a deep sense of justice and despite seeing the worst of Zaun, instead of turning her head to the side, she wanted to dig deeper and to know more.

Vi would lie if she said she did not judge her in the beginning. She was sure Caitlyn would not survive more than an hour down here. However, the girl kept making her raise her brows in surprise, completely changing her views about the people in the Topside.

"It is", the pink-haired girl finally answered, letting out a soft sigh in the process, "Somewhere far. Somewhere better."

And with someone else.

Biting her lip, she turned her attention to the few streaks of grass poking near her feet. She grasped one, pulling it out and bringing it in front of her eyes. Twirling it a few times, she carefully examined it, noting how the end was starting to turn yellow.

There was minute during which each of the women seemed to be lost in their own thoughts. Finally, Caitlyn laid her palm on Vi's back, rubbing small circles on top of the clothed skin. She remained silent, but her gesture managed to ease the tension in the other female's muscles.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Vi shook her head, his eyes still focused on the little piece of grass in her fingers.

God, she wanted to talk. She needed to talk. But what was weighing on her mind, was something she couldn't share with anyone. Especially Caitlyn.

"No, I will be fin-"

"YOU LYING SNAKE!"

Before Vi could realise what was happening, she found herself on the floor pinned by your trembling body. The eyes, once so full of gentle love, which haunted her dreams almost every night, were now staring down at her full of rage. As your name rolled off her tongue, another set of hands got involved by grabbing you by the shoulders.

"Hey! Get off her!"

Whipping your head back, your eyes narrowed to slits once you saw the blue-haired enforcer. Your nose involuntarily scrunched, a clear sign you were far from happy of what, or more specifically who, was before you.

Ekko has already warned you Vi was back in the city and that she was accompanied by an enforcer, but you did not expect... well, her. In your mind, you had built the picture of an old, grumpy prison officer, not a young and pretty woman. Perhaps, you did not want to believe YOUR girlfriend would be giving someone like her a tour around Zaun, while completely forgetting your existence.

Your name was called again and you looked down, your expression softening once your eyes met those of Vi. Many emotions were swimming inside of them - happiness, guilt, pain, relief - all of which were making you wish for nothing more than to press her against your chest and hold her for hours. Your fingers twitched, but instead of embracing her, you landed a few harsh slaps against her shoulders.

"Stop!", Caitlyn shouted once more, grabbing your vest from the back. Instead of calming you down, however, this enraged you even more and you turned around, slapping her hands away.

The enforcer was not a woman who gave up easily, however.

"I demand you to stop!", your body froze as the command left her lips. You stayed still for a few seconds, during which only your heavy panting and the distant shouts of the children around the base could be heard.

"You demand me?", the words came out as a loud scoff and you lifted yourself from Vi, while eyeing the other girl with a mix of irritation and disbelief. With one long stride, you closed the distance between you and gabbed the front of her jacket.

"I demand you to shut your mouth and get your little ass out of here before I kick it so hard, you'll regret ever coming to the Undercity!"

Before things could escalate, you were pulled away by Vi, who held her arms tight around you, while nodding her head toward Caitlyn.

"Cait, give us-Stop it, damn it!", she groaned, tightening her hold, "Cait give us a few minutes!"

The blue-eyed enforcer stood frozen in her place, her worried gaze shifting from her friend to you and then back. You still fought back against Vi's grip, ignoring the feelings of warmth and nostalgia that you felt by being so close to her.

"Please?", the pink-haired woman said again and reluctantly, Caitlyn started walking slowly backward. Once she was far from earshot, Vi released her grip on you and took a step back, giving you some space. She opened her mouth to speak, but you were faster.

Without a word, you turned around and smacked your palm against her cheek. Her head whipped to the side and for a moment, it remained there, frozen. The usually pale skin flushed a deep red where your hand had made contact and your hand trembled, before hiding inside the warm comfort of your pants' pocket.

"I probably deserve that...", Vi mumbled, moving her jaw left and right while she rubbed the sore spot on her face. She took a shaky breath, regaining her composure, before lifting her face. With the corner of her eyes, she could see Caitlyn eyeing both of you with worry and she lifted her hand toward her, a gesture to show her she did not need to intervene. Yet.

The subtle communication did not stay hidden from you and let out an angry huff, before shaking your head. Rarely have you felt such intense emotions, especially since that night when... No. You couldn't go back down this memory lane. Not again.

"Oh, you deserve way more than that!", your tongue pushed against your cheek, biting back all of the colourful insults that were resting on the tip of it. The memories of all those lonely nights you spent crying, mourning, and wondering what happened to her, now hung between you like a dark cloud. No matter how much you have prepared to face her once again, all self-control and reason left your mind as soon as you laid your eyes on her.

"I know you're hurt, but please give me a chance to explain!", her voice was low and soft, an unusual sound for Vi, "Please, I-"

"What is there to explain? You left! You left me! You left Powder! You left Ekko...", with each name, the pain in your chest felt stronger. You closed your mouth, pressing your lips into a thin line before your gaze involuntarily moved to your right, where in the distance the enforcer was nervously chewing her thumb while keeping her attention glued to both of you.

Narrowing your eyes, you grabbed Vi's hand before starting to drag her toward the nearby wood shack. In the beginning, when you joined the Firelights it was used as a storage for hoverboards, but as the members of your group grew, it was soon abandoned and left to collect dust. It was secluded and most importantly away from prying eyes and ears.

The pink-haired girl followed without resistance, giving a last reassuring nod to the Piltover girl, who was now being led away by another Firelight. From all of the scenarios she imagined through the years about your reunion, you pouncing on her was definitely not on the list. A hug, a kiss, maybe even a chance for her to finally show you how much she actually loved you - those were the fantasies that kept swirling around her head all morning when she thought of how should she handle your first meeting after so many years.

Hearing that you were now part of the Firelights was not a surprise. Just like her, you liked to resolve your problems with your fists, rather than talk, and like many young people part of the group, there was nothing that you wished for more than free Zaun. You were stubborn, hot-headed, and reckless, and gave Vi a headache more than once in the past.

Would she have it any other way, however? Absolutely not!

Despite your tough and fiery nature, you also possessed a surprising softness and gentleness, reserved for those closest to you. She often considered herself lucky by being able to see you like this - open and vulnerable, a harsh contrast with your usual combative demeanour. The memories of your many nights spent together, sharing warm cuddles and soft kisses, while your head rested on her shoulder as you talked about your future dreams, often resurfaced in Vi's mind, reminding her how effortlessly it was for you to make her fall in love with you.

Deep inside she foolishly believed that if she ever got the chance to be released from prison, everything would be the same. Powder would still be her little sister, seeking her approval; Ekko would be their smart-ass best friend, who spent too much time tinkering with random gadgets; and you, her first love and girlfriend, would patiently wait for her arrival, ready to promise her the future which you always dreamt about when you were little.

Now, as she stood in front of your furious figure, she felt almost foolish for having such expectations. Of course you would change, you were forced to, just like everyone else in Zaun. The hardships you had to face at such a young age shaped you into someone colder and more guarded.

"I am sorry."

The words fell quietly from Vi's mouth, as she watched your face, trying to find even a glimpse of the love you once carried for her. All that stared back, however, was fury and disgust.

"You are sorry? That's all you've got to say?", you let out a dry chuckle, your voice ringing with mockery. Crossing your arms in front of your chest, you eyed her up and down, finally having the chance to properly observe her appearance.

Vi has always been a beautiful woman, even if she never seemed to care much about her looks. She never bothered with fancy hairstyles or clothes, preferring practicality and comfort over style. Yet, she possessed a natural attractiveness, one that made you turn your head the first time you saw her.

Your eyes focused on her buzzcut, before sliding down her face and noting the numerous new piercings and a tattoo, that were now covering it. Her eyes, still as piercing as you remembered them, held the same fiery spark as before, despite being clouded by guilt. She was also taller and more muscular, now towering almost a full head above you.

"I didn't leave!", she finally said, her expression hardening, "That night..."

The words got stuck in her throat, as she let out an angry sigh and rubbed her calloused hands on her face. Her body slumped against the wooden wall behind her, the loud thud making you wince.

"That night I was taken against my will", she continued, her voice trembling, "By the Enforcers. I... After seeing the remains of the explosion and Powder, I just needed a minute. Some time to breathe, to realise what had happened..."

The rage that bubbled inside your chest just a minute ago slowly started to evaporate, replaced by a mix of caution and confusion. You never wanted to believe that she abandoned you - for years, you pushed this thought aside, not able to accept the idea that Vi is capable of doing something like this. Not to you or Powder.

But as the time passed, the hope you held that she was just hiding somewhere started to transform into suspicion. Seeing Powder becoming Jinx right in front of your eyes, claiming that her sister deserted her, also did not help ease your mind and soon you started to accept this version of the events more and more.

She left you. Alone.

As she continued speaking, telling you how she was thrown in Stillwater Hold, never prosecuted or charged, and beaten and tortured, your whole body tensed. Her words painted a picture of chaos and pain, something completely different from what you had imagined for her. You always thought that she was living her best life, somewhere far away from Zaun.

"Do you know how many times I thought of giving up? Of just accepting that this was the end?", her eyes lifted toward your face, the raw feelings behind them making your breath catch in your throat, "But then I thought of you. Of Powder. And I knew I had to find a way back to you."

Her words hung in the air, and there was a minute of silence, during which you assimilated what she had said. A part of you wished for your initial belief to be true - you spend such a long time resenting her for abandoning you, and to a certain extent you even made your peace with it. But now, as she spoke her truth, you were left both confused and heartbroken.

How could you deal with that?

"I thought I would never see you again", you finally said, your voice sounding way softer and gentler than it was before, "That you are living your life somewhere else... with someone else."

Vi's brows furrowed at your admission and she pushed herself away from the wall, before taking a few steps toward you.

"Did you really believe I would do that?", her accusation made you shrink in your place, "That I would just leave you and Powder by yourself? That I don't care?"

The mention of her sister sent a pang of sorrow through your heart. Everyone knew how hard it was for you to witness her transformation, especially since you fought for years to save her from Silco's influence and twisted games. It took a long time for you to accept the painful truth that she was beyond saving.

"Have you seen Powder?", you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, "Do you know what she has become?"

Her gaze fell down at her feet and she weakly moved her head up and down. Despite seeing it with her own eyes, it all still felt unreal. If she controlled her anger that night, if she never screamed at her sibling, if she didn't step back from her... Maybe everything would've been different.

"I tried, Vi", you shook your head, unable to even look at her eyes, "I tried so hard, but Silco had his claws in her mind, filling it with lies. I couldn't... I couldn't save her. I don't know if anyone can. Even you..."

The woman's face fell - this was the second time she was told there was no hope for her sister anymore. She wanted to argue, to tell you that she could reach her, save her, but deep down she knew what your response was going to be. You were always honest to a fault, wearing your heart on your sleeve, and while Vi always loved that about you, she was not ready to hear the truth. Even if she already knew it.

Closing the gap between you, she cupped your cheek, gently running her thumb across the skin. You instinctively leaned toward it, seeking the feeling of warmth and comfort that you have been missing for so many years.

"I know", she said, still caressing your face, "It's not your fault. You did everything you could."

Her words were meant to comfort, but all they did was add the final drop to the already overflowing pool of emotions bubbling inside your chest. You leaped forward, circling your arms around her taller frame and burying your face in her chest. Hot tears were now flowing from your eyes, a result of years of silent suffering. Loud sobs escaped your lips, and you felt her strong arms wrapping around you, pulling you closer in a protective embrace.

"I missed you!", your words were muffled by your face being pressed against her shirt, "I missed you so much, Vi! I.. I thought I would never see you again!"

Her grip tightened and she buried her nose in your hair, inhaling deeply. The sweet scent of strawberry and cream filled her senses and she smiled, finding comfort in the fact that even years later, you still used the same shampoo. After being hit with the harsh reality of what Zaun has become, she welcomed this familiarity, even if it was a small one.

"I missed you too!", she murmured in your hair, before pressing a tender kiss on top of your head, "It's all going to be alright. I promise! I am here now."

You knew you shouldn't hope - after all, in the past it brought you only hurt and despair. But as she continued whispering sweet promises next to your ear, you couldn't help but cling to them, allowing yourself to believe that maybe, just maybe, there is a chance for you both.

"I would never leave you again!", her voice became harsher, filled with determination, "Whatever happens, I will always be by your side!"

Closing your eyes, you nodded your head, pressing your face even further into her chest. Your breathing was now calmer and the tears had dried on your cheeks, leaving salty trails behind them. If only you could freeze time and stay in this moment forever...

Suddenly your body tensed and you pulled yourself harshly from her embrace, leaving Vi shocked and surprised by the sudden movement.

"What about the enforcer girl?", your face scrunched in disgust as the words fell out of your lips, "Who is she... to you?"

The young woman blinked a few times, taken aback by your bluntness and the sudden coldness in your voice.

"Caitlyn?", the sound of her name made you roll your eyes, "She is... a friend. She helped me get out of Stillwater."

Your brow quirked and your arms crossed in front of your chest, as if protecting you from the idea that there may be something more between them. Ekko has briefly told you what he knew about her and how she seemed to be different from the other enforcers, but even he still had certain reservations when it came to her real intentions and her relationship to Vi.

"Just a friend? Is that all she is to you?"

The pink-haired woman stared long and hard at your face, somewhat amused by your questioning. She bit her lip, trying to suppress her smirk, but she couldn't control the way the corners of her lips twitched upwards.

"Violet!", the sound of you using her full name pulled her attention to your face and she reached out to you again, resting her hands on your waist, "Violet, I am being serious!"

She took a deep breath, fighting the urge to just pull you closer and shut your mouth, stopping you from asking such silly things. Her gaze bored into yours and her fingers squeezed the soft flesh under them.

"Caitlyn has been a great friend and a partner in crime...", she explained, pulling you closer to her, "But she is not you! I am not interested in her in that way."

With narrowed eyes, you studied her face for any signs of her lying, before reluctantly nodding your head. Slowly you lifted your arms, before wrapping them around her neck and immediately starting to play with the ends of her short locks.

"C'mon, I have a girlfriend, who do you think I am?", Vi finally let out a soft laugh, leaning her face toward yours and nudging your nose with hers. A light blush covered your cheeks and the tip of your ears at the sound of the word "girlfriend". After so many years apart, you were not even sure if she still considered you as such.

"A girlfriend, huh? She must be lucky!"

She grinned, moving one of her hands behind your neck, while the other one remained gripping your waist.

"I think I am the lucky one."

She closed the distance between you, pressing her chapped lips against yours and pouring all of the pent up frustration and love she held for you. Closing your eyes, you melted in her embrace, completely intoxicated by the familiar taste of her. The hand behind your neck pushed you even closer to her, resulting in a harsh battle of teeth and tongues, during which she easily dominated you.

When you finally pulled back, both of you rested your foreheads against each other, while trying to catch your breaths. You opened your eyes, immediately meeting those of Vi. Dragging your hand from behind her neck to her cheek, you rubbed it affectionately, smiling once she nudged it with her head.

"If you disappear again, I will hunt you down", you say half-seriously, half-jokingly, "And I will kick your ass!"

A wide grin formed on her face.

"I wouldn't even dream of it."

cc artwork: Shuo Shi

[thewertsearch]

And now we have to deal with this motherfucker.

It’s probable that Scratch knew things would play out like this, which means this message was always intended for Karkat.

...it's probable that that's the case, but there's always a slight possibility that we're in one of his dark pockets. If so, then Karkat wasn't supposed to see this message, and might be about to learn something Scratch doesn't want him to know.

Mr. Vantas.

Dang it.

I'm delivering this message through the console of one of my numerous unwitting proteges to give you a word of advice, and then you will not hear from me again.

Characteristically unhelpful - and in fact, it might not refer to either of Eridan's victims. We still have Tavros's corpse to deal with, and I'm sure there'll be more bodies hitting the floor before the day is out.

All of the bodies in the room remain as they were. There is clearly nothing to be concerned about whatsoever.

Feferi has an eldritch connection through the Horrorterrrors, and they could probably pull some dark magical shenanigans to get her body moving again. I think that's unlikely, though, since Feferi's ghost is active in the Dream Bubbles, and I don't think she'd actually want to be revived. After all, she's go a job to do.

I'm still convinced that Kanaya's coming back, but it's hardly going to happen while our back is turned. We're out of Kernelsprites, so she can't be prototyped - and we can't use her Dream Moon Slab, if it even exists, because Prospit's been destroyed by Jack.

Frankly, I can't think of a single realistic way to revive her short of time travel, and that's not a road we want to go down. I'm really trying not to think about what that might mean.

I guess that leaves Tavros.

There's definitely something going on with him that we don't understand. He was about to smooch Vriska before she stopped him, and the Breath symbolism surrounding the act makes me think it was more than just a typical Dream Self revival kiss. He has a hidden power, and that power seems to kick in when someone's dying.

Could Tavros be a little less dead than we've been led to believe? It's possible - his arc doesn't scan as complete to me. He'd only obtained the merest shred of confidence before Vriska brought him fatally down to earth, and I think there are still many interesting places you could take his character.

CG: THERE YOU ARE, YOU HAD ME WORRIED DUDE […] CG: QUIT THE BULLSHIT PARTYCLOWN ANTICS AND GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE. […] TC: shut up. CG: WHAT… TC: I SAID SHUT THE MOTHERFUCK UP, MOTHERFUCKER. TC: honk honk honk :o)

Gamzee’s rocking a new quirk. He’s still swapping cases, but they’re alternating every message rather than every character, as though his mind is less scrambled than it used to be.

Could this be how he talks when he's off the slime? He already seems more aware than before, and his grumpiness evokes a hangover - but he's honking more than he used to, which is the opposite of what I'd expect if he was sober.

CG: SERIOUSLY, GET BACK HERE NOW, AND HAVE A SLIME PIE TO RELAX OR SOMETHING. TC: SLIME? TC: there is no more slime, brother. TC: AND ANYWAY. TC: shit was motherfuckin poison, didn't you know?

Yup. It looks like Gamzee’s gone cold featherbeast.

It's not a great time for this to happen, but it's not like we can stop it now. I highly doubt Gamzee was forward-thinking enough to reproduce his pies through alchemy, and things are a little too tense right now to try getting clever with an Appearifier. For better or worse, his supply has dried up for the foreseeable future.

So now, for the first time, we're interacting with a Gamzee who isn't out of his mind on soporifics. His shift in personality is already pretty drastic, and I'm interested in seeing what the real Gamzee is like.

[irmise]

I dreamed about you

After so many years of waiting, here is finally the epilogue of this love story... And of course, Michonne occupies all his thoughts, she is his strength in trying to escape, the letters he writes to her, the drawings of her allow him to keep a little hope even when everything seems desperate. He is ready to cut off his hand to escape because whatever happens, his wife, his daughter will always remain his only  choice.

From their first interaction in TOWL, we see a parallel with their last: both moments come straight from Rick's imagination and they both highlight the importance that Michonne has in his life.

Rick was left hallucinating on that bridge telling Michonne that she was his family and that he had found her. Michonne telling him why she fell in love with him, because he never gave up. Even in agony, he remembers that she believes in him. It's seeing her that gives him the strength to get up and try to fight one last time.

And now, torn from his family, it's her he dreams about, in a world without apocalypse, he dreams of what could have been their first meeting. Michonne appears to show him the road to take when he is lost, she believes in him to find his way.

Isn’t that what she’s always done? The one who believed in him when everyone else doubted, when HE doubted himself. She didn't have to be on the same page to know that he would always do what was right in the end. She always showed him the right direction. I remember writting on an old post: "Rick guides Alexandria, Michonne guides Rick" : She always believed in his leadership and she was his compass to guide him and she still is in his dream.

That’s the most beautiful here, in a single dream we find their dynamic, the one we have seen since the start of their journey.

Are you where you want to be ? That's the whole question. Where he wants to be is close to her, it's where he feels safe, it's near her that he feels stronger. So much so that this place he is looking for in this dream no longer matters because he found her.

She became his family, his reason to be happy and to believe in the future even after the darkest times, even after Carl. She once asked him “Don’t you want one more day with a chance?” and he agreed to follow her and hold on to a little hope. And today, even far from her, it’s dreaming of her that keeps him going.

The second dream bears so many parallels too, Michonne with her white dress, like the dream of what a happy ending would have been for Rick in an ideal world.

It made me think about Glenn's death when Rick imagined this moment with all the family he had created in this apocalyptic world. I thought of this scene because of the white dress Michonne was wearing. I remember that at that time, I said to myself that there must be something symbolic in him imagining her in a white dress.

And there we are, her wearing a white dress again and him asking her to marry him. Michonne, his wife, that's his purpose...

The two of them can get through anything and even in his dreams it's a certainty. Together they are invicible by the strength that each gives to the other: "We can make this whole damn world ours if we want to". Like an echo of what he had said to her one day, when nothing seemed impossible with her by his side... “The world’s ours, and we know how to take it”.

He needs her to get there even if it's only in a dream because as she tells him before he wakes up, she believes in him as always...

And that's the problem… All his dreams, his letters, these drawings on these phones, are so many hopes that he must erase if he really wants to be able to become the "savior" that Okafor asks him to be. Agree to forget the love of his life to try to save as many people as possible, sacrificing the little hope he had left. Because even if he found a way to escape, he would put her and their family in danger if only because Okafor found his letter... Rick finally understands that he must give up. And that's also what this episode was about, Rick who gradually loses hope of finding his family, to the point of wanting to kill himself, to the point of no longer dreaming of Michonne, to the point of destroying everything which allowed him to fight.

So desperate that when Michonne takes off his helmet in the last scene he has his eyes closed ready to accept his fate until he opens his eyes and faces hope.

And that's their story isn't it ? She always appears when he's lost, to guide him.

[project-sekai-facts]

the way i only JUST realized that in An's "The Overflowing Feelings" card behind her isn't An's reflection no that is NAGI.....

and im pretty sure there is a bunch more symbolism in it because like. i think nagi is wearing a hospital gown in that card instead of her regular clothes but it is kinda hard to tell

sometimes i see an ask and think "i could make this so much worse" and this is one of those times.

that's not a reflection, that is straight up ghost Nagi. if you notice the grunge texture is actually overlaid over the entire illustration, not just behind the fence. it's not a mirror, it's a fence that separates the living (an) and the dead (nagi). i also like how everything except Nagi on the dead side is blurry even the plants that are right next to her. i can't give an actual explanation because annoyingly this set didn't get a blog post, but my personal interpretation of this is that it's meant to show how Nagi is still close to An even after she's gone (personally I like to connect it to An carrying her memory of Nagi in her heart becase she's clutching her shirt over her heart, but i think you could interpret it as Nagi watching over An from the spirit world too if you want).

i think it could be a hospital gown based on general appearance and the way it ties at the back, but as you said it's hard to tell. it would make some sense though since she died in hospital. but it could just be a generic black dress, since it doesn't look like the hospital clothes she wore in the story. also if you look closely you'll notice her lineart is in a white-grey color which makes her look more ghostly than An.

Also notice how all the other pillars have the red flowers on them (the ones from the gekokujo jacket). I believe these are gerberas, which are sometimes used as funeral flowers. i.e the flowers placed on the other pillars are to say goodbye, but she's actually right there with An.

i think i can still make this worse.

contrast with An's card from Vivid Old Tale. y'know, the one all about her relationship with Nagi and the first time they actually implied that Nagi's dead (they subtly hint at it in BFBY but it was far more obvious in VOT).

This set actually did get a blog post so I can go on about the symbolism. The cards in this set were based on the theme of "warmth and nostalgia", which heavily connects to the event being about An looking back at her childhood and time spent with Nagi, and how much she loves her home.

Sunflowers obviously tie in to that warmth, but they also symbolise positivity, happiness, and hope (the color yellow does as well). These connect with both her dreams in the present and memories of the past.

Also this part of the interview:

The people she loves have seen her grow up and smile compared to when she was a kid and crying after running away. Now while people she loves who have watched her grow up could be her mom or dad, or even Taiga, considering the untrained card...

The person she's smiling at is Nagi.

And that's what makes the LUTF set so fucked up because just LOOK there's so much contrast between them. Sunflowers representing VBS' hope compared to the despair in the LUTF set caused by their defeat to Taiga. The bright colors next to greyscale (and red, which has several different connotations multiple of which are applicable here), how cold the LUTF set is next to the VOT set. An holding flowers in both but in one they're flowers symbolising joy and in one they're flowers symbolising grief. The VOT set is youthful and lively but in the LUTF set everyone is angry, despairing and grieving a life lost.

The fact that the POV in An's VOT card is probably Nagi watching her all grown up (which she never got to do in reality) vs Nagi being dead and separated from An in her LUTF card, not to mention that Nagi is not watching her anymore but instead facing away because she's left An behind (but was she ever really with An in the VOT card in the first place?). An crying in both untraineds but in one she's being comforted by Nagi and in one she's crying because Nagi is gone.

In some ways it's like the VOT set is An's idealistic look at what life will be like when Nagi gets home and the LUTF set is An coming to terms with the reality.

this card fucks me up.

[the-dixon-effect]

Just a Girl

requested by: @dixonsgirl93 which you can find here -> masterlist

A/N: thank you so much for the request my love!! i love this concept so much that it had me up at 4am writing it after recovering from a long-haul flight, so so sorry that this took so long for a little drabble xx

It was too tempting.

Not after years of stumbling around in dirty rags and a single pair of worn combat boots. Not after fighting for your life every single day, were you going to pass this up. Today, you were safe. And right in front of you, in this completely empty mall, were a pair of pristine black stilettos.

You held one in each hand as you admired them, a treasure of a world lost in time. You felt like a different person just clutching them.

"Hey, Maggie!" you are unable to control the wide smile cast across your lips. "Look what I found!" the girl glanced in your direction from the entrance of the store, scoffing at your excitement.

"Whatcha gonna do with those?" she asked, chuckling, as she jogged up to the display table coated in a thick layer of dust.

"I don't know. Walk around. Dance. Put 'em on a table and forbid anyone from touching them," you said quietly, smiling as you palmed at the crisp black leather. "They could be a symbol. Y'know, Lord of the Flies style," you joked, meeting the farmgirl's eyes. Strangely enough, the ghost of a boutique was relatively empty apart from these shoes, a few scraps of useless clothes scattered around and many plastic hangers adorning the white-tiled floor.

"Alright, fine. But ya' have to bring that little black dress back, too," she teased, in that familiar Southern drawl. Pointing to a rack of clothes on the other side of the store, you spotted a lone black dress threatening to fall off the flimsy hanger. It was no surprise that when the remaining survivors came through these parts, rummaging through stores and kitchens and bunkers, a pair of high heels and a mini dress didn't make the cut for the survivalist supply list. It had been a couple years by now, and indeed no one back at the prison would care if you indulged in a bit of fun. Besides, you're just a girl. And a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to get by.

~

Most evenings were spent in the foyer swapping stories and enjoying the ever-expanding group's company, now that everyone was feeling more comfortable in the prison. Daryl was perched on the second step of the cool, steel staircase fletching some bolts for his crossbow, after the fairly uneventful run earlier. One thought did linger in his mind, however - as he tuned out to the rest of the conversations engaging in his midst. You had briefly shown him what you managed to pick up back at the abandoned mall, some scraps of food, some comics for Carl, and... what could only be described as an image from one of his wildest dreams. Or worst nightmares. What the hell would he do with himself if you suddenly appeared in that dress? And those heels? Probably run, and hide someplace where nobody would notice his reaction. And just when he was imagining what you would look like in that outfit from earlier, he heard a voice call out from upstairs.

"Hershel! You better believe these things are harder to walk in than a peg leg!"

The foyer erupted in chuckles as conversations ceased while everybody looked up at you on the balcony, held up firmly by Maggie who couldn't control her laughter either.

"Come on down, Y/N. Betcha can't do it!" the grey-haired man exclaimed as the rest of the group watched you stumble to the top of the staircase.

Oh God. She's so popular. And beautiful - were the thoughts swirling around in Daryl's head as he turned a swift 180 and looked up at your perfect figure. You looked so pretty when you laughed like that; a face that lit up the room - lit up this rotten world - when the sweet sound that even a siren couldn't mimic echoed over the walls of the dismal building. And that outfit; the smooth black dress that clung to your thighs so perfectly with a neckline that revealed just enough to make him go insane. Those heels. Daryl always had a thing for girls with nice legs, but he was always too embarrassed to mention it. It may have slipped out in front of his older brother once upon a time, and for the years to come he never shut up about it. Humiliating Daryl whenever a gorgeous girl like you walked past. Daryl never denied it, though, that you and that perfect body of yours were gonna be the death of him someday. And that felt like right now.

"Maggie, don't you dare let that girl fall!" Michonne shouted, laughing as she kicked her feet up on the cafeteria table and leaned back.

"Daryl, I swear to God, if you don't catch me I'll kill you," you began, addressing the archer that was gawking up at you, the one slightly obstructing your wobbly path down the staircase. Everybody in that cell block watched the poor man snap out of his daydreams as he shot up and grabbed your hand as your knees threatened to buckle beneath you. Maggie let go of her tight grip on your shoulders and erupted into giggles, as though she were playing Cupid.

"Thank you, Daryl," you said sweetly, not realising that Daryl is physically suffocating as you clutched Daryl's calloused palm. You took the opportunity to steady yourself on both feet and do a little twirl, lifting Daryl's arm up over your head as you spun around as gracefully as you could manage. A couple of cheers escaped from your audience, making you smile deeply. You hadn't felt this pretty in a long time.

"Whatcha doin' playin' dress-up anyway?" Daryl drawled, quietly.

"Well, I'm just a girl."

taglist: @alldevilsarehere90 @poisonmenegan @radcollectivesoul @emilykolchivans @pinchoftheoutsiders guys the taglist is looking a little lonely!!

[merymoonbeam]

A Tool of Creation

CC3 spoiler. You have been warned.

In acomaf we learn that book of breathings was made to control the cauldron.

“When the Cauldron was made,” the carver interrupted, “its dark maker used the last of the molten ore to forge a book. The Book of Breathings. In it, written between the carved words, are the spells to negate the Cauldron’s power—or control it wholly. But after the War, it was split into two pieces. One went to the Fae, one to the six human queens. It was part of the Treaty, purely symbolic, as the Cauldron had been lost for millennia and considered mere myth. The Book was believed harmless, because like calls to like—and only that which was Made can speak those spells and summon its power. No creature born of the earth may wield it, so the High Lords and humans dismissed it as little more than a historical heirloom, but if the Book were in the hands of something reforged … You would have to test such a theory, of course—but … it might be possible.” (acomaf)

So...only made can use its magic.

Made = Feyre , Nesta and Elain

And later in the book we learn that the book is written in Holy Tongue—Leshon Hakodesh.

She stared and stared at the Book—as if it were a ghost, as if it were a miracle—and said, “It is the Leshon Hakodesh. The Holy Tongue.” Those quicksilver eyes shifted to Rhysand, and I realized she’d understood, too, why she’d gone. Rhysand said, “I heard a legend that it was written in a tongue of mighty beings who feared the Cauldron’s power and made the Book to combat it. Mighty beings who were here … and then vanished. You are the only one who can uncode it.” (acomaf)

Might beings: Daglan/Asteri

And this is confirmed in Hofas.

Amren turned to Rhysand and said in that new, strange language—their language: “The glowing letters inked on her back … they’re the same as those in the Book of Breathings.” (hofas)

Bryce's tattoo is in the holy language.

And later in hofas Rigelus says that it was his people's language.

“I can teach you things you’ve never even dreamed of,” Rigelus promised. “The language inked on your back—it is our language. From our home world. I can teach you how to wield it. Any world might be open to you, Bryce Quinlan. Name the world, and it shall be yours.”(hofas)

So the book of breathings can control cauldron and it can "open any world" to who can wield it.

Also in Hofas we learn that Asteri corrupted the Cauldron.

The Cauldron was of our world, our heritage. But upon arriving here, the Daglan captured it and used their powers to warp it. To turn it from what it had been into something deadlier. No longer just a tool of creation, but of destruction. And the horrors it produced … those, too, my parents would turn to their advantage.(hofas)

So asteri turned it from tool of creation to tool of destruction.

Once upon a time...cauldron was good.

Can we use Book Of Breathings to uncorrupt the Cauldron? To bring it back to its natural "tool of creation" state?

In Hoeab we learn that the book of breathings is in crescent city. In jesiba's library.

Micah loomed over her. She stretched her arm out—toward the shelf. Her tingling fingers brushed over the titles. On the Divine Number; The Walking Dead; The Book of Breathings; The Queen with Many Faces …

Do we need to get book of breathings from crescent city? Is the crossover not over yet? Are IC going to think with bryce having the language of book of breathings tattooed to her body she might have had access to book of breathings at some point? Are we going back to cc in the next acotar book?

Also it is a great time to add that Cauldron is obsessed with Elain.

“You stole from the Cauldron,” I said to Nesta, who seemed ready to jump between all of us and Elain. “But what if the Cauldron gave something to Elain?” (acowar)

The Cauldron purred in Elain’s presence as the King of Hybern slumped to his knees, clawing at the knife jutting through his throat. Elain backed away a step (Acowar)

The Cauldron seemed to realize what she’d done, too, as his head thumped onto the mossy ground. That Elain … Elain had defended this thief. Elain, who it had gifted with such powers, found her so lovely it had wanted to give her something … It would not harm Elain, even in its hunt to reclaim what had been taken. It retreated the moment Elain’s eyes fell on our dead father lying in the adjacent clearing. The moment the scream came out of her.(Acowar

Why did it give elain such powers? Does it want someone to see how it was corrupted? Does it want to turn into tool of creation state again? Does it see elain as its salvation? (As @riddlecrux talked to me about). All the others saw cauldron as a thing to be used. A thing to be control. But it was only elain who had never stolen from it as nesta did while she was in the cauldron. It found Elain so lovely that it gave her the seer ability.

And from acotar we know that elain look at things as hope.

I gazed again at that sad, dark house—the place that had been a prison. Elain had said she missed it, and I wondered what she saw when she looked at the cottage. If she beheld not a prison but a shelter—a shelter from a world that had possessed so little good, but she tried to find it anyway, even if it had seemed foolish and useless to me. She had looked at it that cottage with hope; I had looked at it with nothing but hatred. And I knew which one of us had been stronger. (Acotar)

So maybe all cauldron needs for someone to look at it with hope. Also @riddlecrux told me that in cauldron myths and legends someone goes willingly into the cauldron to destroy it. Maybe in this case someone willingly going inside it uncorrupts the Cauldron..."Through love all is possible"

And we know that Cauldron is the most important thing in acotar

“Long ago, before the High Fae, before man, there was a Cauldron … They say all the magic was contained inside it, that the world was born in it. But it fell into the wrong hands. And great and horrible things were done with it. Things were forged with it. Such wicked things that the Cauldron was eventually stolen back at great cost. It could not be destroyed, for it had Made all things, and if it were broken, then life would cease to be. So it was hidden. And forgotten. Only with that Cauldron could something that is dead be reforged like that.” (Acomaf)

And in Hofas we learn that Daglan/Asteri made the Cauldron a kill switch.

“Once we left our home world, our powers began to dim. Too late, we realized that we had been dependent on our land’s inherent magic. The magic in other worlds was not potent enough. Yet we could not find the way back home. Those of us who ventured here found ways to amplify that power, thanks to the gifts of the land. We pooled our power, and imbued those gifts into the Cauldron so that it would work our will. We Made the Trove from it. And then bound the very essence of the Cauldron to the soul of this world.” Solas. “So destroy the Cauldron …” “And you destroy this world. One cannot exist without the other.”

In my Mystic&Seers post I connected The Void and Cauldron to each other.

I managed to stand. To take one step before I felt it. The … thing in the Cauldron. Or lack of it. It was lack and substance, absence and presence. And … it was leaking into the world.I dared a step toward it. And what I beheld in those ruins of the Cauldron… It was a void. But also not a void—a growth.It did not belong here. Belong anywhere. (Acowar)

The darkness paused. “You are impertinent as well. Do you not know where I come from? My father was the Void, the Being That Existed Before. Chaos was his bride and my dam. It is to them that we shall all one day return, and their mighty powers that run in my blood.” (hosab)

And from Hofas we know that the Void is actually a blackhole.

The only force in the universe that ate light, so strong no light could ever escape it. A portal to nowhere. To a black hole. Wasn’t that the unholy power that Apollion possessed? The power of the Void. The antithesis of light.

And you know how Elain was when she came out of the Cauldron?

She had been always so full of light. Perhaps that was why she now kept all the curtains open. To fill the void that existed where all of that light had once been. And now nothing remained

The power of the Void...The antithesis of Light.

Elain got rid of that murkiness in her eyes. When Azriel understood what was wrong with her.

It made sense, I supposed, that Azriel alone had listened to her. The male who heard things others could not … Perhaps he, too, had suffered as Elain had before he understood what gift he possessed. He asked Elain, “There is another queen?”

Elain blinked and blinked, eyes clearing again. As if the understanding, our understanding … it freed her from whatever murky realm she’d been in.

Maybe thats all Cauldron needs. So maybe we just need to get rid of the Void, to make sure Cauldron returns to its natural state—a tool of creation.

Also in my Mystic&Seer posts. I looked up what Mysticism is.

Mysticism is popularly known as becoming one with God or the Absolute, but may refer to any kind of ecstasy or altered state of consciousness which is given a religious or spiritual meaning. It may also refer to the attainment of insight in ultimate or hidden truths, and to human transformation supported by various practices and experiences.

Cauldron is the absolute. We looked up that above.

The hidden truths part.

When theia and fionn overthorwn the daglan they didn't learn all their secrets.

They fought the Daglan and won, she went on. Using the Daglan’s own weapons, they destroyed them. Yet my parents did not think to learn the Daglan’s other secrets—they were too weary, too eager to leave the past behind.

And Cauldron made Elain a seer. Maybe to see to learn the other secrets The Daglan had?

We can't even ask Amren because her timeline doesn't even match.

In acosf we learn this.

Rhys shook his head. “Only vaguely now. From what I’ve gleaned, she arrived during those years before Fionn and Gwydion rose, and went into the Prison during the Age of Legends—the time when this land was full of heroic figures who were keen to hunt down the last members of their former masters’ race. They feared Amren, believing her one of their enemies, and threw her into the Prison. When she emerged again, she’d missed Fionn’s fall and the loss of Gwydion, and found the High Lords ruling.”

The problem is how can she go into prison when there was no...prison.

Silene made the prison what it was after she returned from Crescent City. So before fionn's fall...there were no Prison. Actually theia ruled from the Prison Island.

Our home had been left empty since we’d vanished. As if the other Fae thought it cursed. So I made it truly cursed. Damned it all.

One after another, I hunted monsters—the remaining pets of the Daglan—until many of the lowest rooms were filled with them. Until my once-beautiful home became a prison. Until even the land was so disgusted by the evil I’d gathered here that the islands shriveled and the earth became barren. The winged horses who hadn’t gone with my mother to Midgard, who had once flown in the skies, playing in the surf … they were nearly gone. Not a single living soul remained, except for the monstrosities in the mountain.

So even Amren doesn't know. She is even confused in hofas.

Amren picked at an invisible speck on her silk blouse. “It’s murky. I went in before …” She shook her head. “But when I came out, there were rumors. That a great number of people had vanished, as if they had never been. Some said to another world, others said they’d moved on to distant lands, still others said they’d been chosen by the Cauldron and spirited away somewhere.”

So who is better to learn these secret than a Cauldron Made seer?

Also in hofas we learn that Cauldron sits on top of Ramiel.

“The Cauldron,” Nesta said hours later, pointing to yet another carving on the wall. It indeed showed a giant cauldron, perched atop what seemed to be a barren mountain peak with three stars above it. Azriel halted, angling his head. “That’s Ramiel.” At Bryce’s questioning look, he explained, “A mountain sacred to the Illyrians.”

And from Acosf we know that nobody went to look at what lies under ramiel. Sure enough Eris says "secrets". Maybe like daglan secrets???

Eris shrugged, and Nesta knew Cassian monitored his every breath. “There are three of them, you know. Sister peaks. This one, the mountain called the Prison, and the one the Illyrian brutes call Ramiel. All bald, barren mountains at odds with those around them.”

Eris gave him a mocking smile, but continued, “Unsurprisingly, the Illyrians were never curious enough to see what secrets lie beneath Ramiel. If it, too, was carved up like the others by ancient hands.”

What if there is more to under ramiel than we thought? What if its a secret Daglan hideout? I went into detail and what could have inspired it in my Wild Hunt post if you want to read it.

Also we know from acosf that Enalius tried to stop the "enemy" from reaching the stone on top of Ramiel.

Emerie’s eyes shone. “Long ago—so long ago they don’t even have a precise date for it—a great war was fought between the Fae and the ancient beings who oppressed them. One of its key battles was here, in these mountains. Our forces were battered and outnumbered, and for some reason, the enemy was desperate to reach the stone at the top of Ramiel. We were never taught the reason why; I think it’s been forgotten. But a young Illyrian warrior named Enalius held the line against the enemy soldiers for days. He found a natural archway of stone amongst the tangle of boulders and made that his bottleneck. He died in the end, but he held off the enemy long enough for our allies to reach us. This Rite is all to honor him. So much of the history has been lost, but the memory of his bravery remains.”

It was forgotten? Or was it never learned? What if it wasnt The stone the daglan was trying to reach but Cauldron as we know it stood on top of Ramiel? What if they were trying to reach that?

We also learn more about Enalius in hofas.

“You are no creator of mine,” Azriel said coldly. The Starsword gleamed in his other hand. If they bothered him, if they called to him, he didn’t let on. Neither hand so much as twitched. The Asteri’s eyes flared with recognition at the long blade. “Did Fionn send you, then? To slay me in my sleep? Or was it that traitor Enalius? I see that you bear his dagger—as his emissary? Or his assassin?”

The Truth-teller was Enalius's dagger. How did Azriel come to possess it? And we know that after Enalius's dead Fionn took possession of it as it was his friends dagger.

My father had never shown himself to be giving—long had he kept Gwydion and never once offered it to my mother. The dagger that had belonged to his dear friend, slain during the war, hung at his side, unused. But not for long.

And we know that Elain used the TT to kill the King of Hybern.

But as a black blade broke through the king’s throat, spraying blood, I realized someone else had. Elain stepped out of a shadow behind him, and rammed Truth-Teller to the hilt through the back of the king’s neck as she snarled in his ear, “Don’t you touch my sister.”

So how did Elain stepped out of a shadow?

The asteri under Prison says Azriel doesnt know it use—its full potential.

Vesperus took another step, steadier now, and smiled past Bryce. At Azriel, at Truth-Teller. “You don’t know how to use it, do you?” Azriel pointed the dagger toward the advancing Asteri. “Pretty sure this end’s the one that’ll go through your gut.” Vesperus chuckled, her dark hair swaying with each inching step closer. “Typical of your kind. You want to play with our weapons, but have no concept of their true abilities. Your mind couldn’t hold all the possibilities at once.”

True abilities? All possibilities? There is more than just creating a portal to nowhere with gwydion? Maybe that's how Elain could step out of a shadow? The "unknown" abilities of the Truth-Teller?

Also Autumn king says this:

“The Starsword is Made, as you called it.” He waved an idle hand, sparks at his fingertips. “The knife can Unmake things. Made and Unmade. Matter and antimatter. With the right influx of power—a command from the one destined to wield them—they can be merged. And they can create a place where no life, no light exists. A place that is nothing. Nowhere.”

As @offtorivendell theorised in her mating bond theory. Did the Asteri messed with the mating bonds too?

Can the Truth-teller unmake a mating bond? As it looks the cauldron was corrupted? It even ties to Book Of Breathings and what it said in acomaf:

Unmade and Made; Made and Unmade—that is the cycle. Like calls to like.

And don't ever forget that...

"What if the Cauldron was wrong?" 🫡

[coff-in]

hii this is the anon who requested for that pregnancy fic w the graves siblings >< thank you so much for answering my follow-up questions!! 🥺🤍 I had a bit of thoughts as well as your fic and response made me have a hugggeee brainrot!!

so after everything you had said, I had a strange dream weirdly enough of the scenario and hcs you came up with (I like to read fics and hcs before I sleep, including urs <3) and basically, I was thinking that yes:

• ashley, despite not liking [reader] and kind of terrorising her when andrew became obsessed with her, still pretty much assists in kidnapping and bringing her everywhere despite her protests and horror when she witnesses the grave siblings murder and sacrifice people.

• along the way however, ashley has a bit of .. how shall I put it, tsundere feelings for [reader] <3 falling for her and convincing andrew to have a threesome rape with her eventually

• when [reader] got pregnant (before ashley fell for her) ashley ofc wasn’t too happy about it but also, didn’t allow reader to escape from them with andrew’s baby or to scream for help, in fact, she threatens her that if she tries calling for help or running away, she’ll mutilate her arms and legs and cut her tongue out </3 anything to defend her brother

• ok this is probs a bit dark so feel free to skip this one (my own lactation kink!) but can u imagine while [reader] is pregnant, andrew and ashley notice that [readers] breasts are larger than normal .. and that she is leaking through her shirt … and well they *are* a bit thirsty and could use something sweet … so … they caught [reader] unaware and pretty much forces her shirt up before latching their mouths onto her nipples </3 (ahh the symbolism! kind of like healing their inner child by trying out mommy’s milk) despite reader begging and crying for them to stop, they can’t

• omg also maybe a few months in while reader is still heavily pregnant, andrew and ashley can’t stop getting horny seeing reader waddle around with her pregnant belly and decide to rape her bcs she looks too cute not to molest </3

• ooo omg maybe this same scenario but with male ashley (asher) … hating reader at first but slowly falling for her and now, seeing his big brother having a baby with her, he wants one too! </3

thank you for listening to me ramble 🤧 soo many yummy scenarios 🤍 take care!!!

notes from coff-in: 'NONNIE YOU COOKED!!! YOU COOKED A WHOLE MEAL!!! A DINNER FOR FOUR!!! when i woke up to this at first i was like "wow... that's crazy /positive" but i've came back to my inbox to reread this like 10 times and now i'm like "teehee 🤭 that's so silly i wonder what happens next" like... you're so creative, 'nonnie, honestly feeling so blessed to see this in my inbox! YOU CAN ALWAYS RAMBLE TO ME!! remember this guys, you can always come to me to ramble if u need to. i listen to everything

[fem] reader-insert, [afab] reader-insert, mentions/brief talk of male ashley graves, NSFW, rape, incest, pregnancy, lactation kink

you gotta tell me how [reader] and the siblings met. i keep it vague intentionally but i wanna hear from YOU how they meet. what would get andrew so obsessive over them? especially to the point where he has to fight with ashley to keep her around and ashley FUCKING DOES IT?? ashley is impulsive, not stupid, i know this-- she doesn't just outright kill people she doesn't like. but back at the apartment it's a fucking free for all, she would be so so justified if she did kill [reader], she's just another loose end after all. like the lady in room 302. actually this parallels(?) what happened in room 302 a lot; unknown neighbor lady, andrew watching her and keeping her hostage, ashley believing that he just wants to get his dick wet with her (except this time he actually does want that??). instead of killing her they just take [reader] with them... do they ever explain to her why? how would they do that??? they'd probably pressure her into committing a crime (murder/cannibalism) so they'd have that leverage over her... god they're so fucking crazy ♡

i can see andrew just cradling [reader] in his lap while they watch TV, holding her in his arms while he rests his cheek on top of her head. so calm and peaceful while [reader] is shaking like a leaf because ashley is glaring fucking daggers at her and andrew isn't doing anything about it (it all reminds me of julia, except andrew actually likes/cares for [reader] more than he did julia). omg ashley threatens to fucking cut off [reader]'s limbs and tongue and andrew comforts her, petting her hair as he whispers "it's okay, ashley's just trying to scare you. she's just a little jealous. if you keep being good we won't have to resort to that, will we?"

i love sucking on tiddies (i have never done so) so seeing andrew and ashley latch on to [reader]'s leaking nipples is such a mood. it'd be so funny if they sort of fought or pushed each other out of the way so they can drink more and [reader]'s underneath them gently trying to break it up, "hey, hey... one at a time! there's enough for both of you..." i honestly feel bad for [reader] though, i hope they do nice things for her since they rape her so much. (was not expecting to type that out) like they better be giving her the best dick/strap or head ever!!!

these were so yummy, you guys take such good care of me ♡

----

coff-in

[del-thetiredwriter]

The Other Side

Yandere Aemond Targaryen x Modern Reader

Warning: disturbing themes, rape,smut, bad writing, English is my second language…

It all started with the mirror you found in the pantry while you were cleaning the house. You've never seen this mirror before. When you asked your mother where she got it, she said she didn't remember, you could it take if you liked it.

The mirror was old, large and dusty. There were strange writings and symbols around it. When you touched the glass to wipe the mirror, your hand suddenly passed through it. You were surprised. You thought you were dreaming. You plunged your hand into it again. For a moment you wondered about the other side of the mirror. And you went through the mirror

You found yourself in one of the king's rooms, just like you see in palaces used as museums. And in front of you there was a one-eyed man with long silver hair holding a sword to your throat.

"Who are you? Assassin, witch?" The man shouted. You thought, 'Curiosity killed the cat,' but right now you were seriously scared. You had a sword at your throat and you didn't think it was plastic at all. You started to say everything for your dear life. Your name, your family, your life, how you came to this room with the mirror. When you told the man everything, he didn't believe you at first. He thought you were a witch, but somehow you convinced him.

Finally you both introduced yourself really properly. The mirror was a portal. It connected this world with your world. Aemond's world was literally straight out of fantasy books. That's why you were interested, and the same was for Aemond. He couldn't believe it when you told him about your world.

Over time, you became close with Aemond. You went to see him almost every day. You would usually drink tea with him and tell him about your world, he would listen to everything you said. Although he was very curious about your world, for some reason you were the only one who could pass through the mirror. Sometimes you would ride his dragon Vhagar with him but you wouldn't do it very often because you were afraid. In short, he was a very good friend

. Time passed so fast. You no longer visited Aemond as often as before. This did not go unnoticed by him. When he asked why, you said you were moving from your family’s house for College.

Aemond's world came crashing down on him. Would you abandon him? He had loved you for a long time. He wanted to make you his own. He just wanted you to look at him, talk to him, be with him forever. At first he was interested in your world, you were a friend to him, but over time, when you told him about the boys at school you were angry with, one part of him wanted to kill them while he was jealous of them. When you got on Vhagar and hugged him for your life, he found himself getting an erection. He was dreaming about you at night. He found himself waiting for you to come.

Cut after this there are disturbing themes as rape, drugging etc.

You visited Aemond for the last time before you moved. The last time you visited him, you said you were moving, and he didn't like it very much. As usual, you went through the mirror again. This time, however, you found yourself in Aemond's wide bed. Did he change the mirrors place?

“Welcome y/n,” said Aemond.

“Aemond.”

You hugged him with excitement . Again, you told about your day and what you will do when you go to College . Aemond has given you a glass of wine as it will be your last night.

“ To our last night,” said Aemond.You laughed.

“Yes to our last night”

It was getting late now. You had to return home. You must have had a little too much wine because you were dizzy. You wanted to stand up, but you didn't have the strength to move.

“Aemond, I must go home now.” You said holding onto Aemond to get up. Aemond helped you up. You staggered towards the mirror. After that it's dark.

When you woke up you found yourself naked and tied to the bed. You looked around in panic. You were in Aemond's room. Ah you had a headache. The last night you were drinking with but you couldn't remember what happened next. Then you saw Aemond with a glass in his hand. He was wearing nothing but his pants. Your eyes opened in panic.

“Aemond! What's going on. Untie me quickly"

Aemond was silent. He just looked at you and grinned. He took a sip from the glass.

"I waited. I waited a long time for you to love me. I've been patient for a long time not to see my ugly side, but I don't have to wait anymore. After all, you were going to leave me."

You couldn't understand him.

“Aemond, please untie these ropes. I have to go home."

Aemond squinted his eyes and laughed.

“You are already at home Y/n”

He hit the glass in his hand on the mirror and the mirror cracked. No it broke. Your eyes grew in fear at what you saw. You were afraid. It wasn't your friend Aemond, who was always kind to you. With your hands tied, you tried to kick him, but Aemond grabbed you by the ankles and spread your legs.

"Now let's not do this the hard way, okay?"

.

You didn't know how much time had passed. all you knew was that Aemond was fucking you like animals. Each blow was harder and faster than the last. Finally, Aemond came out of it. He placed you with your back on his chest and your face in the mirror. He spread your legs and went inside again. He forced you to look in the broken mirror.

"Look at the mirror. Look at yourself. You know, I'm the only one who can fuck you and give you pleasure like this. Now tell me who is inside you!”

You cried out his name. With a hard blow, he poured his seed into you again. You couldn't take it anymore and fainted. Aemond came out and laid you on the bed. To be fully family with you He had a lot of work to do. Aemond looked at his masterpiece and smirked.Your lips are swollen from kissing, your body is full of his bites and marks, and his seed were dripping from you .

"Soon your belly will swell with what's mine then we'll truly be a family." He said and kissed you again.

[daxerian]

Assignment done

Lando Norris x Reader

Warnings: nothing just extra pure fluff 😏

Words: 3.4k

A/n: I love this piece❤️

You and your boyfriend Lando Norris were visiting your hometown, so that mean why book a hotel when you can stay with your family in your childhood bedroom. Now you and Lando were just talking about life when your little sister burst open the door panicking.

"Y/N I need your help, I don't know what to do" Avery said it fast but you understood, "What happened Avery? Why are you panicking?" you asked her. "Since it's one of the last days before end of the school year my teacher assigned this project I forgot about and I have all the materials ready, I just can't do it alone" Avery spoke with stress in her voice, of course she is stressed, who wouldn't be? "What's the project about Ry?" Lando asked her even though he was tired, "I need to make this thing like a miniature room but I need to make the room inspired by what I want to do in the future" Avery told him, "Okay, then what are we waiting for?" Lando answered her.

“So what is your vision for this Ry?” You asked, “I want to work in F1, not like a driver of course but mayble like an reporter? Avery answered you.

And Lando couldn't contain his excitement as Avery revealed her dream of working in Formula 1. His eyes sparkled with admiration and pride, knowing that his passion had ignited a similar fire within Avery's heart.

"Avery, that's incredible!" Lando exclaimed, unable to hide his enthusiasm. "You know, there are so many opportunities in the world of Formula 1. I'd be more than happy to help you explore different career paths and introduce you to some amazing people in the industry. Like Lissie or Nathalie"

Avery's face lit up with a mix of excitement and gratitude. She couldn't believe her luck. Not only was she fortunate enough to have a supportive sister like Y/N, but now she had Lando Norris, a Formula 1 driver, willing to guide her on her journey.

Over the next few days, the dining room transformed into a bustling workshop. Y/N, Lando, and Avery worked tirelessly, bringing Avery's vision to life. They meticulously crafted tiny race cars, a miniature pit lane, and even a tiny press conference area, complete with reporters and cameras.

As they worked, Lando shared stories from his own racing experiences, giving Avery a glimpse into the thrilling world of Formula 1. He explained the importance of teamwork, dedication, and perseverance, inspiring her to chase her dreams fearlessly.

Finally, after 4 days of hard work, the miniature room was complete. Avery's eyes shimmered with joy and pride as she surveyed the intricate details and vibrant colors. It was a testament to her passion and determination. With tears of happiness in her eyes, Avery hugged Y/N and Lando tightly.

"Thank you both so much," she whispered.

"I couldn't have done it without you. This project is not just about a miniature room, it's a symbol of my dreams taking shape."

Y/N and Lando beamed with pride, knowing that they had played a small part in helping Avery discover her passion. They knew that this project was just the beginning of an extraordinary journey for Avery, one that would lead her to the world of Formula 1 and beyond.

As they celebrated their accomplishment, the dining room filled with laughter and love, reinforcing the unbreakable bond between Y/N, Lando, and Avery. Together, they knew they could conquer any challenge and support each other's dreams, no matter how big or small.

[esoteriamaya]

12th house and the inner alchemist

I notice people with this placement become deeply aware of what frequencies they want to be around. Like if you want something that is more 'jolly, fun, and whimsical' you might search for it in your mind , and then you start to find it in your body. It starts with the spirit first, then you go into meditation to connect with this energy through the art of imagination. That 'jolly, fun, whimsical energy' could end up taking you to a cool coffee shop, end up taking you into a colorful shop with weird looking food , or hell may take you to the circus ! because what youre looking for is the feeling/energy not the 'thing' itself.

I love to say 12th housers are like the boy in this book called 'The Alchemist', where he wanted to look for a treasure to make all his dreams come true, ends up going on a long journey before he finally finds the treasure that was in his hometown all along. In the end he realized what he wanted wasnt about the treasure, the treasure was a symbol to what he wanted to do in his reality which he eventually did without the treasure itself. The treasure is the idea of the energy he wanted in his life, not the thing itself.

Because the imagination brings things to us, and all though we aren't able to explain exactly what it is we are looking for, we go into meditative states to jump into this reality (manifestation) and then follow it with our bodies. And one by one, piece by piece, we enter into the worlds of our psyche through the physical reality.

One thing I can say about 12th housers, you have to let go of the IDEA because it is just that, an IDEA. it is useful for when you are looking for the spirit/energy of the thing you are looking for.

Also since I brought up the alchemist. The story was about making a way for yourself no matter what obstacles you go through, no matter if you dont have that 'thing' you need to get there. You create your reality as you go.

the boy had a simple intention to go find this treasure because he believed it would allow him stop talk taking care of sheep (he was a sheep boy), he could travel all around the world, find a wife, and live the life of his dreams. He evidently did all of that without the treasure! He made a way without even thinking of it, because he knew since he had left his hometown and the sheep there was no other choice but to make something happen!

I believe 12th housers have that inner alchemist inside them, which is why they are so good at painting, drawing, and whatever other art you can name cause its a lot (lol).

12th housers are great at using these things to attract what they want in their life, they follow the frequency/energy knowingly and unknowingly. I call them he universes messengers because they rely messages to the collective without having to explain to us whats the message.

I notice 12th house individuals show this with their music. like I said with frequency a lot of them know the type of energy they wish to convey in their songs because thats the vibe they want to keep with them as they journey through life.

think of sza, a fellow 12th houser with 4 planets (venus,uranus, saturn, and neptune) and she is known to connect to a certain frequency that sounds like 'fairies, sirens, and anything magical' (im honestly referring to ctrl and her older works from 2013/14)

It can also be a 'curse' one type sza tweeted how singing 'supermodel' off her ctrl album 'summoned' the guy she was talking about in the song.

12th house rules over the subconscious, so sometimes your art can attract what you dont want to you. you have to move around it, learn how to use it as a repellant as it can attract fleas (I say this about pisces/neptune peeps a lot, y'all do tend to attract flies).

using your mind to control your reality can be mastered if you continue to heal the shadow. your shadow is just what you've been accustomed to believe that it is shameful, and cant be seen in the light.

the shadow is who you are, dont be ashamed and run from it.

blessings to all my 12th house individuals you guys have a wonderful gift inside that interesting brain of yours! keep it up.

[linkspooky]

I am know this is an insanity broad question but do you have any specific thoughts on Revolutionary Girl Utena? or anything that you think hasn’t been said or just caught your attention? Your one of my favorite meta writers and I’ve been reading your blog since you were doing semi-regular AOT meta, so I guess I should have figured you had seen the series—RGU is a show so dense symbolism, metaphor, ect.—there was just so much to pick apart. Anyway, I would love to hear anything you had to say abt the series!

Sure, I've always wanted to do a meta on the Black Rose arc which is a totally underrated arc. I feel part of the reason it's not as discussed as other arcs is from a lack of understanding of it's role in the story.

The Black Rose arc is a moon arc.

You've heard of the hero's journey, now it's time to learn about the fool's journey. In Tarot, The Fool's Journey is a journey to self fulfillment where each of the 22 major arcana represent a stage on that journey - an experience that a person must incorporate to become whole.

The fool begins their journey at (0), fresh as a newborn, naive and unaware to the world. The fool is strangely empty, as is zero. Who better to serve as our analogue for the fool then the main character Utena Tenjou, characterized by 1) her naivete and 2) her emptiness.

Several years after losing her parents she lost the will to keep on living. Desperately in search for a reason to live a prince appeared before her and gave her one, showing her something eternal, and leaving with her a ring to lead her to him one day. That was all very well and good, but so impressed was she by the prince, that the princess made up her mind to become a prince herself!

Or so the story goes.

Utena is blindly striding forward (and right off a cliff) like the fool card, and also like the fool she's on a journey to fill her emptiness and become whole. At the start of the story she's not a complete person. She's 14 to begin with, but also look at how she reacts when Anthy is stripped away from her at the end of the first arc and the "purpose" given to her is gone. She becomes depressed and barely responsive, and only stands up again to get that purpose back but she's still clinging onto someone else for purpose. Utena is like the fool, on a journey to become a complete person by gaining knowledge of the world.

That is what I would say separates the Hero's Journey from the Fool's Journey, the Fool's Journey is a Jungian narrative in nature. It's not about battling obstacles like in the Hero's Journey, but about the process of individuation. Individuation is the process by which an immature and fragmented psyche, and the experiences of a person's life, become integrated into a well-functioning whole. You can integrate your past memories, your shadow in a jungian sense, your subconscious, into a well-functioning whole.

Utena is not whole however by the time the Black Rose arc comes around, and her lack of awareness of this fact and of her own shadow is exactly what allows it to overtake her.

So we're following Jung here. Jung, Jung, Jung.

Jung and Tarot go hand in hand because Jung believed in archetypes, sets of symbols that were universal across all cultures, that appeared in both dreams and mythologies and were deeply meaningful to us on a subconscious level. The idea of prince and princesses in Utena are a Jungian Archetype. The Moon card Tarot also has major associations with Jung's idea of the subconscious.

PIctured is the full moon int he ngiht sky, positioned between two large towers. The moon is the symbol of dreams and the unconscious,it's light is dim comapred to the sun and only slightly illuminates the path to higher consciousness leading between the two towers.

In the foreground is a small pool, representing the watery, subconscious mind. A small crayfish crawls out of the pool, symbolizing the early stages of unconsciousness unfolding. A dog and wolf stand in a grassy field both howling at the moon, representing both the tamed and wild aspects of our mind.

The moon is a card heavily tied to Jung's idea of the subconscious, or the shadow. If the persona is our outer face to the world, what “what oneself as well as others thinks one is” [CW9 para 221], the “shadow is that hidden, repressed, for the most part inferior and guilt-laden personality whose ultimate ramifications reach back into the realm of our animal ancestors…If it has been believed hitherto that the human shadow was the source of evil, it can now be ascertained on closer investigation that the unconscious man, that is his shadow does not consist only of morally reprehensible tendencies, but also displays a number of good qualities, such as normal instincts, appropriate reactions, realistic insights, creative impulses etc “ [CW9 paras 422 & 423].

Jung believed in a separated consciousness, the conscious mind is the persona the light we can see and the shadow is the subconscious mind which consists of all that we are unaware of and/or is hiding in the dark, quite literally the shadow of our conscious minds.

In Fool's Journey the Moon Card is the stage at which the light is so dim that our shadows become the longest. When I say a Moon Arc in any kind of story, I mean a story arc where characters are essentially caught in the Moon Phase of the fool's journey, which is a special time of confusion and illusion.

Essentially, the Star which is the card preceeding it is the card of temporary inspiration. The star's light is what makes the fool vulnerable to the moon's illusions.

The light that illuminates this for him is The Star (17) which provides hope and a sense of renewal; this is the light at the end of the tunnel. The Fool feels inspired to start shining as his true self. However, its opposite – The Moon (18) – represents any fears and subconscious programming that may prevent him from enjoying this new state of bliss. Light casts a shadow and the shadow, in this case, is the old anxiety and fears which may rise to the surface when attempting to shine brightly as The Star.

The light of the star makes the fool vulnerable to the illusions of the moon. His positive emotions aren't subject to mental clarity. In his dreamy condition, the Fool is susceptible to fantasy, distortion and a false picture of truth.

So that is the moon arc in a nut-shell, an arc where a character gets too close to the light only to be trapped in shadows. How else can you describe the confusing Black Rose Arc but the characters themselves being trapped within a mage of illusions? Much like a dream the characters are trapped in, there's no sense of direction, time flows strangely, and the events of the entire arc are forgotten by the time the characters wake up.

I'm not making up this Tarot symbolism either, in the first episode of the Black Rose Arc we are introduced to Akio, Anthy's older brother who likes to gaze up at stars in an indoor planetarium. A figure who gives advice to Utena all throughout the arc, but who is also clearly hiding another agenda and misleading her on purpose. The light of the stars leads to the illusions of the moon. He even discusses the moon with Utena in Episode 15.

Utena:  Akio-san, you really think about your sister a lot, don't you? Akio:  Do I? Utena:  I probably wouldn't understand since I don't have any siblings myself, Utena:  ...but what does it mean for a girl to have an older brother? Utena:  What's this? Utena:  The moon? Akio:  Normally, it's something useless and of little concern. Akio:  But, every now and then, you look up at it and feel a certain degree of comfort

In this context he uses the moon as a metaphor for a sibling, someone who's always there but you don't usually notice them, but those words could describe the subconscious mind as well. Also, one final instance of star / moon symbolism within this arc the stars made by Akio's projector are fakes. The stars themselves are illusions.

The Back Rose Arc follows a formula to a T. Every episode a duelist comes to the Mikage Seminar for help (which is specifically a therapy seminar more Jung symbolism right there), they begin talking about their problems as an elevator descends down an elevator shaft and the voice listening urges them to go deeper.

Utena later rides an elevator up to the dueling arena too, because the elevators are symbols for traveling to different areas of consciousness. The three levels, the dueling arena at the highest, the academy on the ground floor and the bottom of the elevator shaft era a metaphor for Freud's iceberg theory of consciusness which similarly divides the human mind into three levels.

Not only are the characters physically descending down an elevator shaft, they are also plumbing the depths of their own unconscious minds and revealing to themselves what they have intenionally kept hidden and repressed by trying to bury it that deep.

On the wall there's a specimen of a butterfly that slowly reverses its metamorphosis, from a butterfly, to chrysallis, to caterpillar, and then to a leaf with eggs on it. This too is a symbol of the unconscious, but this time of Jung, because Jung believed the unconscious mind was made up of our most primal instincts. The butterfly regresses to its infantile state while the characters in the elevator regress with it.

These characters become shadow possessed. In the story quite literally possessed as Mikage uses a black rose to turn them into duelist. However, Jung theorized that traits in our lives we repress or refuse to acknowledge are still there, they just come out in other ways.

“That which we do not bring to consciousness appears in our lives as fate.” (Carl Jung)

In the Curios Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde the good doctor Jekyll is a philantrophist who has lived a good life, but makes a potion to bring out his worst traits and transform himself into a hideous monster, so he can commit barbarous acts and get away with it. He just needs to drink the potion again and return to being Jekyll and all of his cruel acts will be blamed on Mr. Hyde. Over the course of the story the potion stops working and Jekyll can no longer drink a poition to neatly divide between his philanthropic good side, and his ugly bad side which robs and murders. He becomes Mr. Hyde all the time, his shadow gains dominance over him making him shadow possessed.

"With every day, and from both sides of my intelligence, the moral and the intellectual, I thus drew steadily nearer to that truth, by whose partial discovery I have been doomed to such a dreadful shipwreck: that man is not truly one, but truly two.” - Robert Louis Stevenson

Not only are the Black Rose Duelists possessed by their own shadows, the repressed qualities that are brought out in the Mikage Seminar's evil therapy session but they themselves also serve as shadows figuratively in story to the duelists they steal the sword from.

Kozue is the fixation of her brother the chaste and knightly Miki's madonna-whore complex, while Miki appears to be the most harmless of the boys he has an obsession with purity especially in his childhood days that he projects onto his sister and also any woman resembling his sister like Kozue.

Juri is the calm, cool, and collected female of the student council. Immediately seems like the most decent student council member. Just as looked up to by all the female students as Utena is. Until you find out she's a lovesick puppy reduced to a total emotional wreck over her unrequited love, unable to do little more than pine over her in secret. Then you meet the person she's in love with and her fixation on her friend Shiori just makes her look even more desperate.

Nanami is desperately attempting to stand in for her brother as the student council president, yet another one of the many ways she tries to earn his affection as his little sister. Nanami's desperately trying to recreate the closeness her and Toga had as children, but Toga's already left her behind for the world of adults, so now she's stuck trying to prove she can join him there when she's not even close as an incredibly high strung and spazzy thirteen year old who's more naive then even the younger student council members. She also has a kid tagalong who is three years younger than her, the same age gap between Nanami and her brother, who's also desperate to enter the same age group as her and be her equal but for the most part just gets treated like a pet or toy.

Kozue takes the sword from Miki, because Miki's issues revolve around his relationship with his sister which is a constant problem that plagues him in his life but something he chooses to ignore rather than address and fix.

Shiori takes the sword from Juri because she too is a shadow archetype, the object of Juri's affection but someone she doesn't talk to, or attempt to mend their relationship, and she especially doesn't seem to understand the real Shiori to the point where you wonder why Juri is so hung up on this person in particular. Is she even hung up on the real Shiori or is it just a fantasy because the real one falls far short of the romantic ideal that has Juri wandering the gardens at night and composing poetry like she's Lord Byron.

Mitsuru takes the sword from Nanami, because Nanami can't see the fact that the way she's treated by her brother, is ultiamtely the way she treats Mitsuru. No matter what Nanami does or how hard she tries to earn it, nothings going to close the gap between her and her brother and she can't force it the same way Mitsuru can't magically become thirteen.

Toga's is the hardest to fit into this category because he's not really around this arc and Keiko isn't much of a character, but it's interesting nonetheless one of Toga's many groupies is convinced of this cinderella like fantasy that Toga's evil sister is getting in the way of her true love with Toga and only if Nanami were out of the way Toga would be hers and hers alone. Just completely unaware of the way Toga treats women and just who Toga is in general. .

It could be a shadow archetype in two senses, one just the bright image of the prince has caused everyone even Toga himself to not notice who Toga really is as a person. They're too caught up in the romantic fantasy of Toga. Or maybe since Keiko taking the sword from Toga practically looks like she's assaulting him in a hospital bed, it could be showing the darker side of the way Toga views sexuality, that it's not necessary something he even likes or wants and has harmful connotations with him. Two it could just be another shadow archetpye for Nanami, there's really no becoming Toga's special girl. Toga's not really going to treat you any differently from everyone else, because he is for reasons completely emotionally unavailable.

Oh, while editing this post I realized I skipped Wakaba and Saionji. Very quickly Wakaba's relationship with Utena mirrors Saionji's with Toga, and Saionji similiarly wants to be someone important / a main character / special like Toga is because he believes it's the only way they can be equals. Wakaba's inferiority complex similiarly drives a wedge in the friendship between her and Utena. Wakaba also kind of uses Saionji as a rose bride of source to validate her feelings and make her feel special when he's relying on her for a place to sleep, whereas Saionji really only seems to want possession of Anthy and the Rose Bride to get one over on Toga so he won't have it.

Not only are the black rose duelists shadow possessed people, but the student council duelists have their swords stolen (symbols of agnecy, power, etc) by their shadow archetypes within the story. Other characters in the story who embody their repressed issues.

They confront their Mr. Hydes and then lose to them. They are temporarily made aware of the moons in their lives, which as Akio describes is someone normally useless of little concern but is always there nonetheless. He was using that to describe himself and Anthy, and by association Miki and Kozue but it applies to almost every duelist / black rose duelist pair, someone who is usually there but they take for granted, or ignore, or in Juri's case just don't want to confront. The Black Rose Arc forces a confrontation for each character with both their shadow, and their shadow archetype.

I could go list the similarities and differences with each set of character but I don't want to go on forever, so maybe in a post for another time. Instead I'm going to focus on the main one at the end of the arc and precisely why this arc is so important Nemuro Mikage, the shadow archetype to Utena.

In all mythologies there appears a trickster, a character which challenges the current ruling authority.

From mythology it is the character of the Trickster “…a collective shadow figure, a summation of all the inferior traits of character in individuals” [CW9 para 484], whom Jung thought could save us from ‘hubris’ and free the conscious mind from its fascination with evil. The trickster is usually thought of as atrocious, unconscious and unrelated, but someone who can nonetheless transform the meaningless into the meaningful. Often encountered at cross-roads, s/he is always moving, duplicitous, sexually rampant and a joker. The trickster is best portrayed, perhaps, by the figure of Hermes, who gave Pandora (‘the all-gifted one’) audacity and cunning.

From the shadows, and quite literally from nowhere appears Nemuro Mikage, a character who believes he can take the power of miracles for himself and also replace the Rose Bride by killing the original and making his partner Mamiya into the new Rose Bride. Can he even do that? How does that work? Who knows, this is Utena we don't explain anything.

The important part is Mikage is the manipulator who challenges the rules at Ohtori, and the established order attempting to subvert things. That's what Utena hates him the most for, being a person who willingly manipulated people who came to him with their issues, twisting them into thorny black roses to lash out at Anthy, and therefore Utena as well. Not only is Mikage made up of inferior character traits he's also an evil therapist who makes you act out on your worst impulses by bringing your worst insecurities to light.

Mikage's not just serving as the temporary trickster archetype however, he's also a shadow archetype of Utena made up of all of her inferior character traits. His name literally means "One's true nature"

根/Ne: lit. 3. “root (of all evil, etc), source, origin, cause, basis” or lit. 4. “one’s true nature” 室/Muro: lit. 1. “greenhouse, icehouse, cellar”.

Nemuro, like Utena is a duelist attempting to seize the rose bride and the power of miracles / eternity / the shining thing for the sake of someone else rather than themselves. They do so because saving Anthy / saving Mamiya gives them purpose.

Nemuro, like Utena is someone who doesn't have friends or family or any connection to the world but suddenly becomes involved in another family consisting of a brother and a sister. He becomes obsessed with the idea of them as a family of three because it fixes the lack of love or connection to other people that is missing in their lives.

Utena becomes obsessed with the idea of playing house with Anthy and Akio, to the point where she completely ignores the true nature of Akio and Anthy's relationship and misses very obvious warning signs. She sees them as a trio especially after moving in with them the next arc. Utena even urges Akio to get in the picture he's taking to commemorate her and Anthy's friendship.

Nemuro also believes he is in love with the older sister, an adult (Nemuro is a child, a child genius but a child nonetheless) but also experiences queer subtext with the younger brother. Nemuro fawns over Tokiko like she is some lost love and makes her the central figure of her motivations, but it's Mamiya he hallucinates actively as being his companion and flirts with when it's Anthy pretending to be him.

Utena is obsessed with a prince from her past driving her actions who is actually Akio, but who she's memorialized in her mind the same way that Nemuro memorialized Tokiko. She also believes there's a relationship between her and the older brother Akio, but that relationship isn't real because she is a child and Akio is an adult. Meanwhile she also experiences the same queer relationship between herself and Anthy who like Mamiya and Nemuro are actuall the same age.

Utena and Anthy's relationship also mirrors Mamiya and Nemuro in that Nemuro's main motivation is to give Mamiya eternity to cure his sickness, something Mamiya has said he doesn't want.

Nothing in this world is eternal, although a heart that longs for eternity could be considered beautiful.

Utena is also attempting to use the duels to protect Anthy, something Anthy never asked for her to do, and something that is actually just Utena selfishly using Anthy to give her some sense of purpose in life.

Nemuro and Utena both imagine themselves as main characters in a narrative, fighting for the sake of their loved ones, and at the end of their hero's journey they will be rewarded with everything they've fought so hard to earn. They're creating stories of their lives and making a narrative to give themselves a reason to keep going after death. For Utena it's a symbolic death, the feeling she should have died alongside her parents. For Nemuro it's his likely literal death, as apparently the Nemuro Memorial Hall and everyone inside died fifty years ago and Mikage has been stagnating for fifty years as a ghost in Ohtori unable to remember the fact that the Mikage hall burning is the long past and he hasn't changed in all this time. They are figuratively and literally dead, and in need of a reason to keep living create a story where they are the main characters.

They also imagine themselves as noble, selfless heroes sacrificing for the sake of their loved ones. Yes, even Mikage when he's playing the villain role of evil therapist and messing with people's minds he's still talking about it as some great heroic sacrifice on his part. It's a bit extreme yes but it's to point out how ridiculous Utena's own hero complex about her duels over Anthy is, especially in Anthy's mind. Nemuro burns down a hall and declares himself a hero for doing so. Utena gets in swordfights behind the school gym class and declares herself a hero. Neither Mamiya nor Anthy ever asked for them to do this, in fact when Anthy starts to genuinely like Utena she asks for the opposite for Utena to run and save herself it's just they decide to do these things on their own while imaining it as some great sacrifice on their parts.

Even your brother's crime! Souji... Come and see now? Back then, in that place who was there. Who wasn't there? Who was it that really set that fire?

Mikage makes it like he's a hero who took the heat for Mamiya's crime of burning down the hall when really he's the one who burned down the hall, and he simply blamed Mamiya for it in his memories.

Everything Mikage is fighting for is based upon unreliable memories, lies, and illusions because you know moon arc.

Anthy openly mocks him for his misguided notion and his hero complex that he's doing this to save someone, by unraveling the memories he thought was guiding him right in front of his eyes, sabotaging him in his fight against Utena.

Souji, you're going to lose. Mamiya! She will scatter the rose you wear. What? Where are you? Mamiya! Mamiya! What the? Who's? You can't beat her. You will never beat my sister who dwells in your memories.

We see this exact same thing happening when it's time for Utena to fight Akio, just when she's about to win Anthy sabotages the fight, mocks her for playing hero and says it's impossible for her to have ever won against her older brother Akio. The way Nemuro cries out Mamiya's name in pain and confusion before realizing Mamiya has been dead for years and the person he's been talking to all this time wasn't the real one, even mirrors Utena calling out Anthy's name in desperation as she realizes she never once understood the true Anthy.

Akio calls Nemuro to tell him shortly afterwards that he was using his unreliable memory of the past in order to further his agenda at this school.

Akio:  I exploited the illusion you cherished in your memory so much that you even halted your own time. Akio:  The period where you hid the possibility in your heart, not growing up, was useful.

Akio similiarly takes advantage of Utena's vague memory of the prince within her heart, in order to manipulate her into the dueling games even perfectly playing her prince later on to both lead her on by the nose and try to poison her relationship with Anthy.

Which is the greatest connecting thread between Utena and Nemuro. They both are creating fiction in their heads by imagining themselves as heroes in a storybook, and they have both built their entire motivations out of unreliable memories. The foundation they are standing on is a misremembered past. A past they've made into beautiful stories in their own minds.

Mikage:  You sound like you're yelling out, "Don't touch my precious memory!" Utena:  What did you say?! Utena:  Don't even talk like you understand me! Utena:  My memory is... Mikage:  I see. It's that memory that's been supporting you up until now. Mikage:  No need to be ashamed. Mikage:  Because the memory you possess is a worthy one. Mikage:  Only those with beautiful memories are allowed to wish, Mikage:  "If only those days could last forever, if only I could still be what I was back then." Mikage:  I know that you're the same as myself. Mikage:  Your eyes are like those people who can't help wanting to make memories last forever.

What is a story but a lie? A fiction? The lies they are told by tohers and the lies they tell themselves are what manipulate them into going forward, straight off of that cliff. After all is there any character with less agency over themselves than the main character of a story? A character in a story doesn't have any free will after all they just go where the author tells them to go, and do what the author writes for them. However, to Mikage and Utena that doesn't even seem to matter because they're both so desperate they need something, even something they subsconciously know is a lie or doubt themselves to keep moving forward. If they don't even have that, then they're dead.

Mikage:  I knew since the first time I saw you. Mikage:  You met the person important to you long ago, right? Mikage:  And so, that person changed your life forever, right? Mikage:  You're standing here on the strength of that illusion. Mikage:  That's why you were able to enter the Duel Arena. Mikage:  Am I wrong? Mikage:  After all, you're just like me.

The fools who are the heroes of their own stories, and characters in Akio's stageplay just keep moving forward until they walk off that cliff. They try to be storybook heroes from beginning to end, unable to see the problem in that until it's too late. Mikage represents Utena's own journey through the labyrinth of illusions that is the moon and what's waiting for her at the end.

The Black Rose arc foreshadows exactly what happens to Utena at the end of the story. Nemuro graduates from the academy, disappears, and all trace of him is gone and people quickly forget about him.

Akio:  However, that's all over. Akio:  From now on, the path before you is not prepared. Akio:  You, graduate now. Utena:  Oh, darn it. Utena:  What a weird place we ended up in while searching for Himemiya. Miki:  There was a really big fire here a long time ago. Utena:  Really? So there really was that kind of trouble. Miki:  It seems there weren't any casualties, but since it was before the time of the Student Council, no records remain. Miki:  Let's see... What was the building called? Kushiro Memorial Hall... Miki:  Sounds wrong. Noboribetsu Memorial Hall? Argh! I hate it when I can't remember!

Utena similiarly leaves the academy and Akio comments that just like Nemuro she'll fade quikcly from people's minds.

Akio:  It hasn't been that long since then, but everybody's forgotten about her completely. Akio:  She didn't cause a Revolution after all. Akio:  Now that she's gone, she was just a dropout to this world.

They also reach their tragic end for similiar reasons, they couldn't stop playing the role of the hero until the very end.

It's pretty much spelling out to us how the series is going to end in the second arc. Utena / Nemuro are brought into the dueling games on a false memory that's manipulated by Akio to give them a reason to participate. In their final duel, they're betrayed by Anthy and sabotaged in the middle of their fight causing them to lose. Afterwards they struggle against the truth. The result of them learning the truth is them being exiled from Ohtori Academy forever, and they are unable to save the person they want to save by playing prince, Mamiya was never alive, and Utena never got to know the true Anthy. All because they decided to play storybook prince in the first place rather than look at the reality.

Utena's however, ends on a much more hopeful note. As she's at least escaped the fiction of Ohtori Academy and Anthy insists that she is still there somewhere out in the real world. Just like the world in Tarot is the last card of the Fool's Journey, where as a whole person the Fool is now ready to join the rest of the world.

However, the Black Rose arc doesn't just foreshadow the ending of the story perfectly with Mikage's ending, it also is just the nature of the moon tarot card itself. People call it fillerly because there doesn't seem to be any real substantive change to the story, but illusions are illusions they're not supposed to be substantive. The characters don't change after the confrontation with their shadow selves.

You think so? Huh but she's. She hasn't changed. Not a bit.

Number one there's no real end in the conflict between the shadow and the conscious mind and number two that's what happens with dreams they fade in the daytime and are forgotten when you wake up.

That's the moon in general too. Always there for you. You don't usually think about it and it doesn't serve any real purpose, but from time to time you look up at it... and it makes you feel better.

[fantasies-fairytales-n-fics]

Thranduil and Josie Pt. 161- Cat Scratch Fever

Summary: A black cat crosses Josie's path bringing more bad luck to the Dorwinion castle. Narcisse is off kilter. Charles and Francis unite but not in agreement over their mother. Mary feels deep guilt of her knowledge. Francis gets under Josie's skin. She and Lola speak more about Narcisse's past. A cut won't heal. Bash has a scary story to tell. Josie panics over a possible resurrection.

*Chapter Warnings* language, angst, censored gif, sexual references, murder mentions

Chapter characters: Josie, Narcisse, Charles, Francis, Mary, Lola, Bash

Chapter word count: 8,447

Stories Stories Stories Masterlist

When you got to Stephane's chambers, all was quiet after you knocked well over three times and called to him. Odd it seemed, considering the guard had told you Narcisse said it was urgent, so now you became concerned.

"Stephane?!" you loudly called to him one more time and wriggled the locked door handle.

Suddenly, you saw a shadow moving rapidly pacing about under the door and heard Stephane's charcoal gray magical Maine Coon cat Merlin, crying and clawing at the door. The crying swiftly then turned into a low emitted growl as if something were frightening him.

"Merlin sweety? What's wrong?" you asked as you bent down and placed your fingers under the door so you could scratch his chin, but he wanted no part of it. Instead, he began to hiss.

Something was wrong. Merlin was no "pussy" per se. In fact, he was quite the bad ass like all cats believed they were, so the scaredy cat persona was completely out of character for the long locked beauty of a beast.

"Alright honey. I'm coming in." you warned and gave the door handle an electric zap with a single twirl of your finger.

The latch made a loud click and then you cautiously pushed the creaking door open.

"MROWWW!!!" Merlin screeched and sped out of the room so fast, you almost tripped over him.

The room was dimly lit with all the curtains closed and on the sofa laid a sprawled out sleeping Stephane with one hand clutching an empty goblet over his stomach and the other hand grazing the floor with dried blood all over it.

Gasping, you quickly made your way to him, finding yourself crunching over a broken and bloodied shards of a mirror upon the floor. Kneeling down beside him, your widened eyes studied his chest to make sure he was breathing, which he was but it had a low raspy sound to it that reminded you of a....tiger's growl?? and he reeked of whiskey. Believing he was just snoring and intoxicated, you studied him over some more, especially his injured hand as you gently picked it up by his wrist so that you wouldn't shock him.

Angling his hand about to assess it, you noticed his gold ring, the one he always fidgeted with when he was anxious or lying. You had never paid much attention to the details of the ring before but now you could see it bore two gemstones, side by side as one piece that reminded you of the yin and yang symbol, for one stone was a black onyx and the other was a white moonstone. You knew that yin was of darkness and yang was of light. Could that be what the ring symbolized?

Moving your eyes on to his knuckles, they were all tore up so it was apparent that he had punched the mirror, but why was the question? Your hunch was the combination of the booze and his anger at you stemming from Haldir's spontaneous lip lock that he witnessed and possibly even something to do with Catherine's eldest son making an unannounced arrival that Stephane had clearly been upset about.

In that moment, Stephane had been dreaming. It was the day you first came to Dorwinion and he found you his red clover field searching for Haldir's gifted dreamcatcher you had dropped in the colossal cluster. At least he thought it was you as he viewed your long wavy scarlet strands from behind. Upon the woman's turning around, he found himself uttering the same words of shock that exited his lips that day and it wasn't the only shock he got.

"It is....you."

"Here kitty kitty kitty. Miss me? I've sure missed you. It's time to wake up once again, just as I had awoken the beast once before." Caroline cackled, forming her wicked grin and then clutched his hand, sending a burning jolt of juice through him, much like the one you and he experienced that day when your hands touched.

Feeling bad about his hand, you softly laid your hand over his wounds to heal him and in doing so, the electric current that you and he shared when your hands touched, shot right through both of you, startling him awake. But it wasn't Narcisse that you awakened.

Towering over your cowered body as you laid upon the floor in sheer terror, was a snarling and salivating beastly black panther with razor fangs as white as pearls and eyes that burned of the sun...and gusting from his roaring lungs was a fiery breath not of peppermint, but of black pepper.

"AHHH CHOOO!" you uncontrollably sneezed, spraying out a mist of sparkling silver water droplets into the ferocious feline's face.

He roared in pain and swung his paws in a frenzy at his eyes, giving you enough time to run and hide behind Stephane's liquor bar to try and rationally think of what to do, for this colossal cat was Narcisse and you didn't want to hurt him with your magic if you didn't have to, although it seemed you accidentally already had.

You were planted in a panic against the wooden bar, holding as still as you could as your frantic eyes scoured the darkness for movement and your ears searched for sound. Surely the beast would find you by sniffing you out, especially now that you noticed the palm of your hand had been scratched by the creature's claws and was bleeding. What in the hell was happening?? You knew nothing of his shapeshifting power. How the fuck did Narcisse transform into a giant fucking black cat before your very eyes and WHY?????

Your shallow breaths ceased as you heard grunting and groaning and then all went quiet again. As you prepared to counter attack in the least harmful way possible, you were grabbed by the arm and swiftly pulled to your feet by a sweating Stephane.

"Are you alright Jo???" he panted, steadying himself on the bar as you gaped at him in a frightful confusion.

"I...I...uh...umm...yes. I..think I should be asking YOU that??"

Narcisse glanced around, seemingly disoriented. "I...I don't feel so well."

He began to lean and fall, but you caught him and assisted him back to the sofa.

"What...what did you do to me??" he groaned and plopped onto his back, rubbing his eyes similarly to how the elephantine ebony cat had done.

"I...I don't..know?? I..I didn't mean to do anything. Lie still. I'll get you a wet rag soaked in healing water."

You cleaned your hand in the water which seemed to have ceased the bleeding, then quickly came back and sat beside him, forcing his rebelling hands away by his wrists in order not to shock him again and then laid the cool cloth over his inflamed eyes.

Narcisse made a frown as he licked his lips. "Silverbane. I can taste it. You sprayed me with fucking silverbane."

"W..what? I..how? and...I thought you were immune to poison??"

"Well apparently I am not to yours which you seem to have as a built in defense mechanism. I really wish you'd get your magical shit together Jo." he blindly griped with gritted teeth as he held the rag firmly over his eyes.

"But...even I can be hurt by Silverbane?? So how do I...oh wait..." you gasped. "It's just like Garrett. He can be hurt by fire, but yet he has fire power inside of him....and at Lestat's...I....I almost forgot....I had somehow conjured up Silverbane from thin air and blew it at my mother when she had almost depleted all of Garrett's blood."

"And yet once again, we are back to the vicious vampire." Stephane snarled as he snapped the rag to the floor with a huff and sat up.

He was somewhat right, you supposed. There you were, referencing Garrett after what you could describe as a cruel and vicious vision he sent you only moments earlier in your chambers. Even so, what you recalled was all still very relevant which would never matter to Stephane.

"You speak to me about being vicious after I just watched you turn into a very large vicious cat???? No wonder Merlin hightailed his ass out of here. Even he was afraid....and...so were you, for my safety. I can only assume that this is what was so urgent? What the hell is going on Stephane???"

"What's going on is that I'm a bit incapacitated at the moment which you seemed to have forgotten." he defensively deflected in which you immediately pointed out.

"Stop deflecting. Here. Let me heal you and...."

"No! Do not touch me Jo. A bath in the healing waters will do just fine." Narcisse barked as he abruptly scooted away from your extended hand.

"Ok, then at least let me help you."

"I'm perfectly capable of taking a bath...alone. Don't you have some place better to be? Like say...Mirkwood?"

Narcisse rose and headed for his bar to pour another drink, for his nerves were now unbearable after what had happened.

You flung to your feet and followed him. "YOU asked me to come here to your room...and now you want me to leave...and...for good?? What, kicking Haldir out wasn't pleasurable enough for you??? You want me to travel with my child when Harker is stalking all of us???" you reeled with stinging wet eyes.

Stephane's eyes refrained from yours as he knocked his drink back and poured another. Of course he didn't want you to go but his pride wasn't about to let you know that.

"Oh it was quite pleasurable to send the Lorien sprite packing. You have Legolas now since I see I now have more unwanted guests in my castle. He will keep you and Leean safe on your travels."

Narcisse turned without so much of a glance at you and walked to the other side of the sitting room with you once again following.

"You heartless son of a bitch! Have you forgotten why I am even here???! I need that book to stop Jareth!!"

An angry tear jetted down your cheek as you sharply blinked from Stephane's aggressive advance into your face.

"Heartless??!!!!! After ALL I have done for you and your company! All of the kindness I have offered you that I have never given to anyone else! Sleeping in my bed right after I confessed I was in love with you and I even pathetically allowed myself to shed tears at your feet over the fear of losing you. You also allowed me to love that little girl. YOU are the one who has forgotten! ALL you care about are the elves and that fucking vampire. You played me well Josephine. Beat me at my own past games of using someone for pleasures of the flesh. I can see I was right when I had once told you that you were a worthy opponent because no other has ever possessed the ability to make me feel less than I was and I can see no possible means of recovery from it. But I guess I have no one to blame except myself for letting my defenses down and letting you in, allowing you to see me bare in more ways than just my skin. Do you remember when I told you that?? That if you and I were to dive into those waters, that is what you would see? But the thing is...you don't see me! And you never will. I will never make that mistake again. I opened my heart to you. I told you things I would never tell a single soul. I threw you the grandest of birthday parties to make you feel better and because you hadn't had one since you were a child. I risked my life and men for you! I have even saved you from yourself! And for what?? To watch you kiss both Haldir and Garrett. Maybe, instead of standing here tearing my own self worth to shreds, I need to realize that I am not less just because I was much more than your inexperienced little hands could handle."

"Please...please stop Stephane. This was never about who you are. I know I hurt you and I am so very sorry, but I swear I never used you. I genuinely care for you, ALL of you and appreciate all you have done for me and Leann, or I would already be running after what I had just witnessed. I don't want to lose you too. Why can't we just please sit down and talk about this...really talk and listen and stop trying to hurt each other?? Let me try to fix this."

Narcisse knew that he had already scraped the bottom of the barrel with all he had just said and now he knew he must go even lower. You just weren't safe with him anymore.

"Because I have come to see it is no longer worth it. You...are not worth it and never were. It IS very much about who I am. It's about who everyone is because no one is your precious King or even Garrett, for they are all you speak of. No one else is good enough for you. I will not let you have me without the madness that makes me. If our demons cannot dance, neither can we." he growled with cold eyes and walked away again.

This time you did not follow, but stood there with a gaping mouth as many tears now fell.

Pouring himself more of the liquid courage to help him proceed in ripping both of your hearts out some more in order to push you away, Stephane drank it down, hesitating to turn and face you, for he could feel your tears and to see it would break him, so he remained a coward and faced the bar, then reluctantly began to continue on about Catherine.

"I called you here to inform you in person about Catherine so you wouldn't be blindsided by her release. Is that what a heartless person would do?"

"Catherine's....re...lease??" you stammered. "Wh...why on earth would you do such a thing????"

"I do believe that is none of your business. My castle, my rules and it's about time people start respecting that. I told you what you needed to know, now what you need to do is pack up your daughter and go back home with Legolas after this night."

"Are...are you insane??? Not only is Harker out there but so are Jareth's orcs! They attacked Legolas and Aragorn and almost killed the man who is travelling with them!"

"Insane? I have been called much worse, although I am sure many would be inclined to agree with you. Now, you can take your opinion and run along. I have a much needed bath awaiting before entertaining the enemies."

Narcisse gulped down the last of his bottle, then grabbed a robe and stormed out of the room, leaving you not only reeling at his lack of giving a shit but also wondering where he was even going since his bath was right there in his chambers, so once again, you followed him.

The room you entered consisted of a sizeable stone pool surrounded by dim candlelight and the air scented of floral fragrance, for upon the opaque water floated multiple flower petals. Pink roses if you were to guess.

Stephane stared at you with a scowl and undressed right before your stunned eyes, then scoffed when you promptly turned away upon the removal of his leather pants.

"As if you have never viewed my cock before. Why are you still here??" he griped as he yanked his ring off, then threw that and his robe to the floor.

The Yin and Yang gemstone clanked it's way to your feet. Keeping your back to the very nude Narcisse, you snatched it up.

"Oh stop with the infantile theatrics for once. You know why I'm here. You don't get to drop a bomb on me like that about Catherine and just walk away. I demand to know why you would set her free!!"

You trembled as you could feel him creeping up behind you. It wasn't because you feared him but because of how intimidated you were by his bare form. Not only had you laid your eyes upon the splendid sight of sculpted beauty a few times before, but you had also laid your body on it as well, so why were you so damn nervous??

"YOU will demand nothing of me." he snarled into your ear as he reached around you and swiftly snatched the ring right back out of your hand, but not fast enough to avoid the electrifying current. Gasping in unison with you, Narcisse quickly made his way into the vat of sparkling liquid and sat down to conceal his waxing wood, for the shock had greatly aroused him.

Slowly, you turned to face him once you heard the slosh of his descent beneath the water.

"Well then, I guess Catherine being on the loose is the lesser of two evils with what else has been released!"

"Alright, I'll bite. What do you mean?" he firmly asked while sitting stiffer than the stiffness below him.

"It's what I have been trying to tell you and why I need to find Ashmole. Jareth has done it. He has risen the dead, just like that psychic woman told me at my party or...I should say, like Peter told me in that vision I saw of him and now...he will come for me! I cannot leave here Stephane! Or you would be handing me right to him."

"And just how is it that you know this?"

"How do you not?? You know he has the three page spell to do it, no thanks to my mind altered father and just before I came to you today, I...I had another vision. It was...it was the vampire Kate. I saw her, with a head and all and...with Garrett. My visions are just like my dreams, both of the present and future and they are increasing and if I saw Kate, then many more are out there somewhere, waiting for something, something that I fear will change our lives forever. I fear a war is coming for the winter solstice. An army of the dead. I feel it. Even Legolas senses something sinister in the air."

Narcisse's bright blues gaped at the water in realization that your words were true. Jareth was the reason Rahl had resurrected and in that moment, he saw his denounced dark half reflecting back at him in the ripples, clawing at his soul to fully emerge from the grave...a box bound by 7 iron chains buried deep inside of Stephane's mind where he had cast him out to, but he could feel the chains breaking, one by one as if it were the rapture.

"Ahhh, I see now. That is what has your panties all in a bunch. Once again, it is because of Garrett. You're jealous."

"W...what??? What the hell is wrong with you??!! THAT is all you can speak of after what I just told you?? Not to mention AGAIN that you are releasing Catherine and having some party tonight as if Harker and the dead are not upon us! Oh, and there's the fact that you shapeshifted into a wild cat larger than Blaze! Seriously, what is happening? WHO are you and what have you done with Stephane???"

Stephane's expression was sullen and his gaze soulless, much like the soulless orbs of the animal that preyed upon you moments earlier. A soulless animal he once told you he was not and his words were as icy and cold as his dilated blues.

"The man you speak of no longer exists."

As you stood frozen by his words, he rose from the water. It was a shimmering sight that you now could not remove your eyes from no matter how hard you tried, almost as if magic were being used upon you, breaching your shield.

Narcisse slowly approached you in a most tantalizing manner, the water dripping and glistening over every inch of his masculine form as if he had been slathered in baby oil as his cock gave you it's undivided and full attention.

"I'm a monster. Refume by unfortunate events and given breath by necessity."

You took a staggering step back, unable to breathe. Unable to break the animal magnetism radiating between your bodies until his pupils glowed of the sun once more, followed by a low emitted growl that vibrated through his adam's apple.

Gasping, you stumbled back and found yourself racing out the door and down the hall, constantly glancing behind you, expecting to once again see the melanistic monster with paws measuring the size of both your hands combined, charging after you, but instead, you ran smack dab into Charles as you turned the corner.

"My lady?!! You...you look a fright." the young warlock exclaimed as his arms clutched tightly around your waist.

"I..." you panted and swung your head around to see an empty quiet hall behind you. "I...oh gosh. Well now I am just embarrassed." you softly said as you released Charles while a handful of people he had been speaking with, all stared at you.

"I was just...in a hurry...that's all. I apologize for my clumsiness." you explained, glancing behind you once more.

"Are you sure that is all it is? It would seem as if you believed something were...chasing you?"

His eyes were concerned and confused and you had to wonder if Charles knew of his father's "condition", but you certainly were not going to ask in front of the all the eyes still upon you.

"Oh no, no. I just need to go refresh for this evening's gathering, so I...I will just be on my way now. I'll see you then."

You awkwardly smiled and quickly resumed your path but once you came to the end of the hall, Francis and Mary rounded the corner. As the King and Queen of Lake Town passed you, Francis had slowed his pace to lock his baby blues with yours once again. He also offered you a slight head bow and a subtle smile, then continued on his way to call out to his half brother Charles.

Out of curiosity, you stood by the exit to watch as Charles turned with a sizeable smile.

"Francis." he raved and gave a hand swaying bow to the golden haired King.

Francis skipped the formal greeting altogether and went straight to embrace his little brother as Mary kept her distance and watched as well.

You knew nothing really about Francis but from what you could see, he truly cared for Charles and vice versa.

The two stood and conversed, but not loud enough for you to hear, so after a moment, you turned to leave, only to be startled by Mary.

"Oh..my!" you halted and gasped as your hand planted onto your chest.

"Oh dear, my apologies. Forgive me. I did not mean to frighten you. I am Mary. And you are Queen Josephine of Mirkwood?"

"Y..yes...I.."

"I am sorry we did not have the chance to meet when you and your King were in Lake Town. My King and I were away on business. Luckily I suppose, considering the dragon's destruction. I would like to thank you for your aid in ridding of the foul creature and I...I offer you my...condolences over King Thranduil."

"Thank you." you simply and softly replied as your eyes fell.

Her eyes fell too as she fidgeted with her clasped fingers that laid upon the beaded bodice of her golden gown, that from the waist down, looked as if a thousand ducks had been plucked to assemble it. The girl was most likely no older than you with long waves of dark chocolate hair coordinating with her coffee hues and in them was a pool of true sorrow. Mary knew of the breath that Thranduil still took and may have been aiding her own King in Narcisse's blackmailing, but she was far from content with it. She did it only for the happiness of Francis so his mother could be free, even when she herself knew what Catherine was, for the two always clashed. No one was good enough for Catherine's son, whom Mary deeply loved. And because of that love, she couldn't even imagine what you must be going through.

"A...penny for your thoughts?" you asked the suddenly distant girl who you just realized probably did not even know what a penny was. "Oh...sorry. It's just...modern day currency where I'm from."

Mary's rosy lipped smile grew wide as she giggled. "Oh, I know what it is. My late father-in-law was the greediest man in all of middle earth. He traveled far and wide and had quite the colossal collection of riches, even pennies, which he had mounds of."

Well, that explained to you why Peter ended up there in his search for you and bought the emerald pendant from the abhorrent Alfrid just before Thranduil had captured him. If anyone was a greedy bastard, it was piggish Peter.

"I just...I feel terrible for what you have been through. Word travels far." she continued, then smiled again. "I'll take my penny now."

"Well." you smiled back. "If I come across one again, I will give it to you."

"That would be nice. I know they are not worth much, but to be gifted one from a beautiful Queen would be quite the treasure. It is nice to meet you Josephine. I hope we will see more of each other. I better tend to my husband. He and Charles seem to be in a disagreement of sorts."

You smiled and turned to see and hear the two young men quarreling and you knew exactly what it pertained to. Catherine being released, for Charles was greatly opposed to it and it was quite apparent that Charles had the better head upon his youthful shoulders when it came to her true colors.

"Just ask Josie! She'll tell you!" Charles shouted and motioned for you to come over.

"I do not need to hear her side, for it is not her decision." Francis firmly stated.

"And it is yours?? This is not your castle. It is my father's!"

"And he has agreed to free her. She is our mother Charles. She will not be treated like an animal! Why on earth would you side with the man who destroyed our family??"

Charles scoffed at his brother and quickly turned to you, where you stood hiding slightly behind Mary.

"Is this true?? Did my father agree to release her???" he asked in desperation.

"I...Charles...I'm..sorry. He...has and.."

"Unbelievable!" he snapped and spun back to Francis. "She coerced our sister into using black magic to kill a King vampire, which could have brought a war to our lands that we would surely lose and she also forced her into helping to poison a Lorien elf! And now our sister faces being banished from here with a newborn child!"

"Claude is a grown woman and made her own choices. She was not forced. She will be better off away from here anyways and to return with me to Lake Town, our home Charles! Where you should be as well."

"THIS is my home. I will go nowhere with you, nor will my sister!! You're as mad as our mother! I am going to go have words with my father!"

Charles stormed past you, but you grasped his arm. "Charles, no! I...umm, Narcisse...he's...he's in a bad way at the moment and I would not advise a confrontation. Trust me...please." you pleaded with worried but stern eyes which Charles seemed to understand.

He stiffened up straight and sighed as he lifted his chin to glare at Francis.

"I don't know what you have done to my father, but know this. This is far from over...brother."

Your heart was racing as Charles marched off, for you were praying he would heed your warning about Narcisse. Charles may have been merely 19 years old, but he was hot headed and certainly no push over, just like his father.

Francis turned to you with a smile, showing no sign of shame or regret over the dispute. It was as if it had not even happened.

"My lady. We have not been properly introduced. I am King Francis of Lake Town and I am honored to be in the presence of such beauty."

The audacious blonde bowed down, then took your hand and kissed it right on front of Mary, making you feel terribly awkward and bad for her.

You gently and politely as possible, slipped your hand out of his and forced a smile, when really, all you wanted to do was slap him.

"I...I am Josephine."

"Oh I know exactly who you are. A queen as well. It is such a shame to hear about your King. I suppose now I will have to confer with Legolas for our trades. Or maybe...I shall speak with you instead? I would greatly prefer that. Maybe over some dinner and wine?"

The words going through your mind at that moment were far from queen like. The nerve of this jackass...oh god, Josie, calm down. Breathe. You glanced at Mary, who remained silent with her head hung low, fidgeting again with her hands.

"It is King Legolas and he would be the one to speak business with is usually not discussed over dinner and wine."

The look in his blue eyes told you he was turned on by the way you shut him down.

"We can always skip the business then and just enjoy each other's company. In the meantime, I'll let you ponder on that. Mary...come. I must go see my mother now."

Francis walked off, not even waiting for Mary, so you quickly stopped her.

"I...I am so sorry for that. Please know, I..I would never..."

She softly smiled and took your hand. "It is alright. You are not his first conquest and certainly will not be his last. I..I must go."

As you watched her catch up to Francis, you wondered the same thing that Charles had asked...how did he get Narcisse to free Catherine? Off you then went as well, for you needed to speak to Lola about Stephane's past once more.

Lola was rocking Leean's cradle and singing softly to her when you arrived and you noticed her tears before she quickly turned away to wipe them.

"Lola?? Is everything alright?"

"Oh yes." she proclaimed as she turned with a smile. "Don't mind me. I was just thinking of my mother after we had spoke of her earlier. She used to sing to me and Leean really likes it. Even more so when you do it."

"I am so sorry Lola. I never meant to upset you. I...I miss my mother too. Well, the one I used to know as a child wearing rose colored glasses. Lola, I don't mean to change the subject but...when we spoke of Narcisse earlier, you said there was a time when he was different? Could you elaborate a little more on that because...something is very wrong with him. It's like....it's like there are two of him."

"Yes, that is kind of how he was from what my mother told me. Not kind at all and he dressed much differently. Robes and such, mostly of a scarlet red. Longer hair, dark as coal and his scent was different as well...kind of like..."

"Pepper??" you abruptly interrupted.

"Y...yes? I believe so."

You paced about for a moment in deep thought, fidgeting with your own hand, for it was itching something awful, then you stopped to look at her.

"You're certain it was Narcisse and not a...twin? I know you said before that you did not believe him to have any other brother but Bash, but you were just a child. It's just that... he told me something once that is not adding up now."

"I suppose I cannot be certain. I never saw or knew the Narcisse my mother described and he..."

"He what?" you asked when Lola had paused in thought.

"Well, he...he went by some other name too, I...suppose there could be a twin? If so, he surely never speaks of him. There's only one other person that would most likely know. His brother...Bash."

"Was the name...Lord Rahl??"

"I...yes. Yes, that sounds right. I think it was?"

That is where you would head next, to Bash, for now you were worried that if there was an evil dark twin like Stephane had told you there was, was he the one you had just encountered?? Had he done something with the real Narcisse and taken his place?? Because Lola confirmed the scent of pepper and that is exactly what you smelled. Although Stephane told you that he killed Rahl, it was certainly possible he was brought back by Jareth. OR...were Narcisse and Rahl the same entity? Holy shit.

"Lola..I...I have to go. I..I will see you and Leean tonight for the dinner party and I want you both to stay at Legolas' side. I will find him and send him back here to get you."

As you turned to go refresh, Lola gasped.

"Josie?? Your hand...it's bleeding!"

You also gasped as your eyes gaped at the blood trickling down your fingers.

"Owww, god." you groaned as you quickly squeezed a cloth into your fist, then sat down, for you suddenly felt dizzy and overheated.

"What happened?" Lola asked as she promptly brought you a pitcher of healing water, then sat beside you to help clean the wound.

Not wanting to tell her the whole story just yet until you spoke to Bash, you decided to fib...just a little.

"I..uh...broke a mirror earlier and...cut my hand when I was cleaning it up."

Lola pried open your clenched fist and removed the cloth.

"Oh my. Josie, that's pretty deep and looks...possibly infected."

It did. The gash was slightly blackened around the edges and it burned, and strangely, even more so when Lola patted it with the water soaked cloth.

"Mmmmph." you flinched. "I'm sure it will be fine after I soak it for awhile."

"Maybe you should have the healers look at it? You...you seem a bit pale."

If only Thranduil were here, you thought as tears stung your eyes. He would heal you right up with one touch of his soft magical hand.

"I'm alright. The sight of blood has always made me feel queasy."

The dizziness seemed to have passed, so you took the pitcher into the wash room and filled the sink basin, then held your breath as you submersed your hand. Five seconds was all you could withstand before you had to abruptly withdraw.

"Jesus!" you cringed and then noticed a sizzling effect on the cut of both sight and sound.

"It's like it's fucking holy water. I should be asking YOU Narcisse or whomever you are, what YOU did to me??" you complained under your breath while you angrily wrapped and secured a clean dry cloth around your hand.

"Lola, if Leggy comes back while I'm gone, tell him I went to speak to Bash and that I will be back soon. We can all go to the dinner together. Keep this door locked until then. it is to only be opened for myself or Legolas. If Narcisse happens to show up, you tell him, through the door, that I am not here and that Leean is sleeping so he'll go away."

"Through...the door? Josie...what is going...."

You were out the door and rushing down the hall before she could finish. One way or another, you had to find out the truth because it now seemed that danger not only lurked outside of the castle walls, but still remained inside of them as well.

"Bash!" you loudly whispered against his chamber door as you briskly tapped upon it. "I need to speak to you again. It's urgent."

"It's open." he called to you.

Upon your swift entry, you found Sebastian leaning against the wall by the open balcony doors, looking as if he had seen a ghost. Had he?

"Bash?? Is something wro...."

You froze solid as you came into view of the dead blackbirds scattered about the terrace floor. Slowly, you walked past him with wide eyes to get a better look, praying one of them was not your Freddy, the ridiculous name Garrett had given your crow over his Scooby Doo fetish.

As you visually searched through the feathered carcasses, you soon sighed heavily in relief because they were all too small to be your faithful friend.

"Bash...w..what caused this??"

"Mayhem and death. Birds fall from the sky when evil witches like him are near."

"Him?? Are you speaking of Harker?"

You had only known Bash for merely 2 months, but in that short time, you could tell he was a warlock warrior who feared nothing, not even Harker who had almost killed him...but in that moment, he looked absolutely terrified. And he was, for he had all the answers you sought and although it was a secret to have never escaped his lips, Bash knew this time, he had to tell you and later face the consequences.

"No...my..brother."

"Narcisse...did this?"

"Rahl." he simply stated with a horrified stare into your eyes.

"So....Narcisse does have a twin." you whispered as you clutched your burning hand. "Bash...I...he told me he was dead but...I think this Rahl was one of the many Jareth has conjured back from the dead with that spell and I think he has done something with Stephane!!"

"Twin? There is no twin. My brother Stephane and Rahl are very much one and the same." Bash verified and then glanced at the dead birds. "The only difference is that everything Stephane is, Rahl is the opposite of."

You had to sit down. You knew this was a possibility, but to have it be validated was overwhelming. Stephane had what you would know as...D.I.D. Dissociative Identity Disorder, otherwise known as a split personality or an alter...but who was the true identity? At least now you knew Stephane wasn't being held captive somewhere...or dead.

"So...he...he lied to me..."

"Wouldn't you? Lie about it? It's not something he is proud of, nor did he want it. Rahl has done evil things, like Harker and Jareth. Some he recalls, some he does not and Stephane is ashamed and certainly would not want you of all people to know, in fear of what you would think of him. My brother was never perfect. He had his own bad side when he was crossed. You've seen it. He punishes the evil, but he is not a cold blooded killer like Rahl."

"I...I suppose I understand that, for I was able to talk him out of doing some horrible things and I don't feel I would have succeeded if he did not have goodness in him. I..I'm just trying to process all of this. Referring to one body by two different names. I know it's a real thing, I just have never encountered it."

"Rahl is his second given name, after our father. Our father, who I believed caused the split by making him do despicable things as an adolescent. Stephane wanted to be good...of light. Not dark like our father, but our father expected more from him, being the oldest and he placed a very heavy weight on him to follow in his footsteps and that's exactly what Rahl did."

"He...he told me Rahl had your father killed, by that man Stephane fought and killed in the gambling tournament to the death."

"Yes, but it didn't quite go as planned. That man, Theodore, was his good friend whom he met because of Catherine. He was her husband, King Henry's brother. Rahl tricked Theodore by morphing into Stephane's image and offered him a very large sum of money to kill our father. He was full of greed just like Theo, so he knew he could get him to do it and not have to get his own hands dirty, possibly due to his subconscious, which I think was Stephane trying to fight him. But that quickly changed. Before Theo arrived that night, an argument revealed the our father had killed our mother and despite his blackened heart, Rahl loved our mother, so he killed our father first. Stephane didn't remember it right away. I think the trauma caused the memory lapse and when he did recall the events years later, that's when he set out to kill Theodore and end Rahl himself. As I said, our father did terrible things and made him do the same, but to Stephane, he was still our father whom he did everything to please....and he hated himself for what he had done, although sometimes I wonder if Stephane possibly wanted our father dead too. It would be a lie if I said I did not have similar feelings. I still stood by my brother though, because I knew of the things our father made him do. I tried to help him but I could never get through to him. There was nothing I could do. Rahl was too strong and powerful, even more so than Stephane. I never blamed Stephane for the things he had done. It wasn't his fault. I believed his hand was forced and his mind was ill."

"And he did all this for the crown? Stephane said his father didn't want Rahl to have it."

"He did at one time, but that was before he noticed the new change in him, the good side, the real Stephane, the one before our father's dark influence consumed him at a young age, altering his mind and that's when things went sour. Two others knew about his condition. One being your father Julian who tried to help him. That book you seek, the one Julian has hidden, it has the spell to lock the alter away in his mind and it also has the power to release him. Your father banished Rahl before he hid the book away to keep it out of Jareth's and other evil one's hands....including your mother's....because your mother, Caroline, who was the other with the knowledge of my brother's illness...she's the reason our father was killed."

"Wait...w..wh..what????"

"When Julian took Ashmole from his mother Jadis to undo Jareth's death, Caroline got her hands on it temporarily. When your father unknowingly slept with her twin Carrie, she punished all who knew and kept it from her and that included my brother. She brought the darkness of Rahl out of Stephane to a diabolical head... in a way no one had ever seen and hence, Darken Rahl was born. More wicked than our father could perceive. More wicked than he. Our father believed he would destroy all he had built and he denied him his right to the throne, so Rahl chose to take it, which is why Stephane has never called himself a King. In Rahl's short years of reign, even then he strangely was addressed as Lord Rahl, for again, I believe Stephane was somewhere inside of him, very much aware."

"God...my mother, even dead, still destroys people's lives. I've always known there are many things I don't know about that she's done and I'm sure this is only a fraction of it and...."

It just hit you. Something that you should have realized long before.

"Oh dear god Bash."

He tilted his head and stepped towards you with questioning furrowed brows.

"My lady?"

"My mother! What if Jareth....could he have brought her back as well?? And could she have awoken Rahl again?? She wouldn't need the book, for I am certain she would remember the spell...or...or did Jareth wake him up???"

"I suppose either or both are possible, but I hope for your sake, your mother was not one of the resurrected. I have never met her but her wicked reputation certainly precedes her in all of middle earth."

"Damn it. Why did my father have to go back for those pages?? Harker would never have gotten his hands on them if it weren't for that and my father would not have been converted to darkness. So now, what do we do about all of this without the book?? Because if you know about Rahl, then surely you must know about his animal form, the fucking gigantic jaguar I encountered earlier."

"You saw that?? That means....he is closer to surfacing than I realized."

"I not only saw it, I was scratched and it burns like hell. I tried the healing water, but it intensified the burn." you explained as you held your bandaged and trembling hand out.

Bash tried to hide his growing concern as he took your hand to look it over, but the light tremors in his fingers told on him.

"The water won't help it. It's like adding fuel to the fire. His claws are poisonous and his bite is venomous, both like no other. As I said, Rahl and Stephane are opposites even if they share the same body. Rahl propels poison, Stephane repels it. The Rahl that Stephane created is not the Rahl your mother conjured in the past and the one brought forth now will only be 3 times worse. It's like a pain scale of mild, moderate and severe."

"Third time is definitely not a charm. So what is it going to do to me?? And how do I get rid of it...and is that even possible?? Stephane, he repels poison yes, well, except mine for some reason, possibly because it was not him I cast the silverbane upon??...and his peppermint scent...it heals poison. He healed me from the dark forest and from wolfbane, so can he not heal me??"

"The question is...will he? Unless you can get Stephane to resurface, there is not much time before you will suffer vivid hallucinations and pain, and your powers will be completely useless. You will also be at Rahl's mercy. You will need Delphine, a witch doctor, for she has the only known antidote. She resides near the city. After the party tonight, I will go and try to locate her. She doesn't trust anyone but me."

"Stephane...he...he was still himself...right after he shifted back and realized what happened and what he had done. He was extremely worried for me...but then...his personality quickly began to change and when I last saw him, well...he was definitely not himself."

"The rapid change...It's because of the shift. After the cat appears, he is all Darken Rahl."

"It's my fault. I...I accidentally brought the beast out by shocking him...god...I need Garrett!! He can heal me, I know it. BUT...he is off doing who knows what with his former mate that Jareth revived. Bash, you must be very careful. Her shock is far worse than mine and let's not forget Harker and what he has already done to you. And I know Aragorn, Bard and Gimli went looking for Haldir, but please, if you see him, tell him I'm so sorry and that I miss him."

"I will...Josie...It's not your fault. You couldn't have possibly known. I will find Delphine and I will even be on the lookout for Garrett and the newly remodeled Kate. I will tell him you need him. I do not fear her nor Harker. Stay close to Legolas this evening and I will keep my eye on my brother. You should go now, before he finds you in here again."

After you left, you went back to your room to find a note from Lola on the vanity stating she, Legolas and Leean went to the dining hall to wait for you and that Boromir was anxious to speak with you. You had forgotten all about him and that he had come all the way there to inform you of something quite urgent, almost dying in the process.

You then went to the dresser to find some lace gloves to conceal your hand and as you did so, you caught your reflection in the mirror. Tears instantly formed at the mess you had become. Not on the outside, but the inside. It was a moment when you had felt more alone than you ever had.

You had to turn away, for you feared you would see Garrett again and you didn't need to be reminded, as if you'd ever forget, that he abandoned you and chose to be with a demon summoned from hell. All you had now were Leggy and Lola. All were gone, even Narcisse...even your letter to Thranduil that mysteriously vanished and you really wanted to read it again to feel close to him.

You sat on the bed, lost in the thought of your King, for he is all you truly wanted...and that's when the full blown tears came.

"Thranduil?? My love.." you squeaked. "I...I don't feel you anymore and I'm scared. I'm so scared and I'm lost and...I'm in trouble and I...I just need you...please...somehow, please come back to me...please my King, come ba...."

You loudly gasped and sprung to your feet and your heart paused and dove into your gut when you realized something else. Something horrifying, yet miraculous. Something even you wanted to do once.

Your words then came flooding out of you, choking away your air.

"Oh my god...could Jareth have done it?? Is...Thranduil alive too????"

@redeemer46

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Alright, I took a quick nap and Ive decided that I wanna get the UTM reenactment over with as quickly as possible so Im reading chapter 42 and then I'll reward myself with some pain au chocolats and not thinking about this book for the rest of the day and watching the 2002 takarazuka flower troupe production of elisabeth instead. lets go

Chapter 42

here we fucking go with the illyrian wingspan-dicksize correlation, how would Amren even know that isnt she above sex or something. Honestly, I think Cassian would know wayyyyy more about that. on account of all the gay sex hes having i mean. I thought of that joke and then I realized that you could interpret it to mean that he knows about that because hes illyrian and has a dick, but I want to make it very clear that this is a gay sex joke

how come wings are so sensitive that just barely stroking them makes you moan and shudder but you can still fly with them in harsh winds with no issue. My headcanon is that wings arent actually that sensitive, Rhysand and Cassian are just weirdos with a specific kink

This conversation Feyre and Rhys are having about his wings is so weird, its like dirty and yet uncomfortably clinical

oh Rhysand is quicker than death just fucking kill me, im getting so angry again

Syphons are called 'Trichtersteine' ['funnel stones' or 'funnel gems'] in german which is more accurate to how we're actually told they work imo but it sounds pretty lame

Is it just me or is Rhysand being kinda weirdly paranoid rn. I mean granted, they did just get attacked with ash arrows so maybe hes actually doing a good job for once and Im just biased against him

Okay so we finally get some night court fae wearing white, but of course its not for moon symbolism its so they can blend in with the rock of the mountain because this series does nothing but disappoint me

The Hewn City actually sounds really cool, why couldnt this have been the secret city where we spend most of our time, you couldve made it a whole thing about Feyre healing from her trauma UTM through like, exposure therapy or something idk. That wouldve been neat and dramatic, her healing from her UTM trauma in the place that inspired it with the person that inflicted it. I mean, maybe that would be less healthy and even more controversial than Feysand already is but then you could atleast lean into the dark romance of it

I mightve said this already but you knowwww sjm is NOT a painter and consulted ZERO painters because Ive never heard of anyone think about creating art the way feyre does

and Mor is wearing red AGAIN why would you make this a trigger for Feyre just go back and edit it out its not like it matters

God, the description of her outfit is so deeply discomfortingl like it literally is exactly what she wore while she was being drugged assaulted but atleast they left the bodypaint out this time

"[Keir] looked at my face, then my body. I had thought that he would stare and drool greedily but... there was nothing. No emotion. Just ice cold. Shaking internally, - from anger and revulsion - I followed Mor." Im sorry, is she mad that Keir doesnt find her hot????

Theres something uncomfortable about Feyre referring to Rhysand as 'Mor's Lord' especially when we just had a whole paragraph describing her as a proud and empowered queen

"Usually, one Syphon was enough for an Illyrian to to able to steer his urge to kill down the right path." what???

Now shes describing Azriel as dark and beautiful as death and oughhhhhh i knoww im the only who cares about this and its for a pretty stupid reason but I care a lot and it makes me very angry

Feyre referring to a 19 year old Mor as 'barely more than a child' is weirdddddd

of COURSE hes wearing a black tunic for this, I cant believe this is the guy that the fandom has designated the fashion lover when he has two (2) outfits

Feyre describing Rhysand as sooooo powerful and beautiful with a face of nightmares and dreams makes me want to vomit, but more importantly, it makes me yearn to rewatch the 1996 takarazuka star troupe production of Elisabeth with Asaji Saki as Death who unirionically fits all of Feyres descriptors 1000 times better

Not Rhysand using Feyres Cursebreaker title while hes thoroughly humiliating her

Now Feyre is calling him a god, bro youre not gonna be able to have sex if you jack him off this hard hes gonna be all sore

Imagine being a hewn city noble and you all get together because your high lord wants something from you and youre kinda scared because hes the worst, and then you just have to watch him finger some random lady. and you cant leave because then he'll just kill you

I dont like that this is framed as empowering to Feyre, i think its one thing to write a female character who sexualises herself in order to empower herself but the fact that Feyre is doing this at the behest of Rhys automatically renders it non-empowering to me. Like yeah, she obviously consented to this but it wasnt her idea but this was not her idea and this is not something she usually does, the only times shes been sexualized like this is because it was part of some plan that Rhysand came up with

"[Keir] apparently clung to the power. But Rhys was the power." i hate that that sentence made me think of Keir/Rhysand as a ship why am I so goddamn yaoi-brained. And yeah, i know theyre related but according to Rhys himself, he and Mor are only cousins in the most distant sense, so. Man, that would make the IC dynamics so much more fucked up but also so much funnier

Theyre trying so hard to make this hot n sexy but its just so unappealing and dragged out. Granted, sorry if this is TMI, but I did just jerk off so Im all out of horniness for the next little while so maybe I just dont like this because Im not in the mood but idk. theres something so annoying about this, i think its how over-the-top and artificial Rhysands hotness feels, not to mention the fact that he is absolutely not my type

Imagine being Keir rn, just trying to do your job and tell your high lord everything that he needs to know, meanwhile his high lord is sitting in front of him fondling his new sex slave and you just have to keep a straight face. i mean, he sucks ass so i guess he deserves it but man

Presented to you with no further comment: "My breasts became heavy and full, longing, desiring, just like my crotch."

goddamnit, Rhysand just said that he put Feyre on his leash and then Keir made a kinda slutshame-y remark about her clothes and then I thought Rhys was like "maybe I'll put you on a leash too" but it was Feyre who said that. another loss for big gay incest

"He liked this as little as I did" uhhhhh no offense girlie but you actually seem to be having a pretty great time rn

I dont even know what to say about this part where Feyre is like, detaching herself from her thoughts that are calling her a traitor a liar and a whore ?? I think thats whats happening here?? Like, its trying so hard to be sexy but its invoking the imagery of Feyre's (and even Rhysand's) trauma and its just very strange

It took Rhys a fucking eternity to actually touch her pussy

What if Keir developed a voyerism kink because of this. would that be fucked up or what

Its so weird how Feyre thinks about how maybe Rhysand doesnt like sex or being desirable anymore because of amarantha and that certainly sounds like a trauma response he should have but instead it just never matters

"I had been tortured and tormented but my pain was nothing compared to his." YOU DIED

Oh man I cant believe I completely forgot about the absolutely iconic part where Rhysand gets so mad Keir for calling the woman he introduced as a whore a whore that he telepathically breaks his hand about it

what was the point of doing that, Feyre didnt even seem to like it that much

[bestworstcase]

@cryptidblues tumblr Ate this ask for some reason so copying text from the email notif

See I’ve always thought that the mechanism through which cinder stole the maiden powers (bug) from Amber made her a Grimm hybrid. And THATS why Ruby’s silver eyes worked on her at the top of beacon tower; regardless of the presence of the wvyern. Because underneath her skin she was Grimm (and still fully human). “Your newfound strength brings with it a crippling weakness”/“You said the light only reacts to Grimm but…it reacted to Cinder”/“perhaps there was something that you just weren’t seeing?” Leading from that the implicit threat of “Oz can’t defeat [Salem]”/“but maybe someone else can?” to Salem is not that Salem could be eradicated by silver eyes (go poof like other Grimm) but rather be put back in The Tower by silver eyes. By being turned to stone. Still immortal but frozen. Trapped. Her Freedom completely sundered. “You thought there was no greater punishment we could bestow upon you?”/“Your light comes from his brother”/“The god of light…his eyes”. There’s an assumption that Salem is invulnerable, no personal skin in the game, “she’ll come back”, nothing effects her, nothing sticks; but her running this risk of being petrified by silver eyes gives depth and high stakes to any interaction she has with Ruby face to face (and her possible complex relationship to a hypothetical favorite silver eyed lieutenant). ᓚᘏᗢ

the reason i Don’t believe the grimm beetle made cinder vulnerable to the glare atop beacon tower is that ruby hits her with a second full-blown glare in atlas towards the end of v7 and—even though cinder by that point has a whole grimm arm—cinder flies away from that one unscathed. either:

a) the implication salem makes in v5 that cinder can learn to resist the glare is true,

b) there is an additional, unknown but more important factor besides “grimm” involved here, or

c) both.

i think the answer is probably both, although more b than a. (maria sees the flash coming from the god of light’s eyes and concludes this power came from him; but she couldn’t see that ruby’s eyes were silver until she saw their light go off, and she missed those two silver-eyed children of ozma’s. “maybe there’s something you’re not seeing” is true of her, too)

(the silver light evokes the pure white of the void between realms, where the dead travel from life to death and the souls of the living and the dead can meet in between. ozma passes through this liminal space every time he dies and reincarnates, and his children with a mortal woman have silver eyes. after ruby witnesses pyrrha’s death and her light erupts, the hand cinder used to kill pyrrha is destroyed and ruby spends months hearing echoes of pyrrha’s final words—which she wasn’t there to see—haunting her dreams. there are butterflies, classic symbols of reincarnation and in certain cultures historically identified as psychopomps, all over the scene where maria discusses her theory. maria is also philosophically wrong in her conception of creation/life as “enemies” of destruction; destruction feedslife and exists in balance with creation, and the glare itself is definitionally destructive. silver eyes have something to do with death.)

the kids at least, per nora and “maybe someone else can [destroy salem]?” do seem to be thinking in terms of ruby’s eyes being the silver bullet that can stop salem if not destroy her outright, and ruby has the wyvern example to look to to be thinking about trapping salem in stone forever. but then the leviathan is there to raise the possibility that petrification is not necessarily forever, and salem herself seems unconcerned when ruby’s eyes start to flash in ironwood’s office. plus again the implication salem makes that the glare can be resisted: if that is something she taught cinder to do, it’s something salem must be able to do too.

i do think the glare is probably capable of hurting her somehow—i have my own specific headcanons as to how for Fic Purposes but in terms of textual speculation, what happens if you take a grimm woman who can’t die and blast her with the grimm-killing light from the threshold between life and death? it sounds painful, if nothing else.

but if the leviathan could break free after being petrified, and salem is both immortal and human and thus able to, like cinder in v7, resist the glare in some way, i think being turned to stone or encased in stone is not likely to slow her down for very long. although i can’t imagine she would enjoy the experience.

the other factor to consider is that—well, quite a lot of the fandom assumes the point of silver eyes is to “purify” the grimm out of people, for example saving cinder from her grimm arm, and on the basis of maria’s theory that is an easy extrapolation to make; which is to say, after the experience in the ever after, i wouldn’t be surprised if the idea of “purge the grimm out of salem to make her herself again?” was broached on the heroes side. the reality though is that being grimm is not what’s wrong with salem and becoming grimm is something she chose, or at least accepted as a possible consequence of what she attempted to do when she jumped into the pool of grimm, and using silver eyes to try to Force Her to go backwards is probably not a good idea and not something that will work. she is change incarnate—that’s what destruction means.

so there is a thematic challenge here that might be explored; seen through the lens of maria’s theory, silver eyes are anti-change (preservation) and therefore anti-theme (destruction is part of life, not the enemy of life) so her theory is incomplete and the most obvious way to fill in the gaps and arrive at the whole truth is to test the glare against salem herself, because she is change. 

and because rwby is so thematically driven i’d anticipate this happening concurrently with salem turning in a new direction, which intersects in very interesting ways with what is being set up vis-a-vis needing cinder to open the vaults vs wanting cinder to be alive, safe, and free. (i think the momentum there is toward salem being forced to choose between getting the crown and protecting cinder, and she’ll sacrifice the crown for cinder’s sake; the… possibility of silver eyes being involved in that scenario is obvious.)

[tanoraqui]

The thing about the recent Goncharov resurgence is that imo people are reading way too much into the symbolism! It was a famously troubled production- the anecdote about Jean-Luc Godard ringing Matteo JWHJ0715 just to laugh down the phone and then hang up is probably untrue, but trotted in every New Wave cinema tell-all book nevertheless- and they were almost 20 million over budget. No wonder the dress in Katya’s dream sequence is reused by Sofia in the balcony scene, and appears on a shop window in Naples. They had to save any dollar they had left!

Replying to this SO late, but: ok a) symbolism is in interpretation, which means it's the audience's contribution more than the creator's, which means there's no such thing as "reading way too much into it."

Also, yeah yeah they were over budget but who isn't amiright. I DO believe the anecdote about how much they had to bribe every single soldier along the Berlin Wall in order to do all that shooting on location.

And c, they make the budget-necessitated symbolism WORK, okay! Katya dreams about the dress because Sofia wears the dress because the dress symbolizes the freedom she could have had if she'd left with Sofia then, and Katya knows that! So when she sees it in the shop window toward the end, it's still out there but it's too late, it's behind glass and she doesn't have time to stop, because she has to go kill her husband and continue the cycle of revenge... UNLESS you subscribe to the Katya Lives theory (10/10 I agree), wherein that specific dress is still probably out of reach, but maybe she can reach "New York in the fall" like Sofia said!

Constrictions create great art, basically. Imagine how much better some modern movies would be if they DIDN'T have billions of dollars to lean on, rather than, like, good writing and acting.