#and so neil just has to accept he has to be a LOT more direct when trying to flirt with todd because he is oblivious to the max

[anghraine]

It's true that minimal effort or qualifications in white men go a lot further than for most others, and is absolutely a significant issue worth engaging with. That said, I think the "mediocre white man" catchphrase is often a bit of a trap, because it's so easy for it to devolve into arguments or self-congratulations or anxiety about just how mediocre the man in question is.

IMO the question of mediocrity mostly matters when it comes to the much higher demands for qualifications or abilities or talents placed on everyone else and the smoothing of professional paths for less qualified white men. That absolutely does happen, but most of the time when I see the "mediocre white man" thing, it's about a white man who has done something morally abhorrent and not about some random guy undeservingly getting breaks in his profession.

And the thing is, if you're condemning a man for doing something horribly unethical, it doesn't matter whether or not he's actually good at writing or directing or music or speaking or inventing things or cooking or programming or lifting heavy objects or whatever. Some dreadful moral affront committed by this guy doesn't become somehow more acceptable if he's genuinely talented, nor worse if he's not. And bringing his supposed mediocrity in his profession or hobbies into the argument invites a separate and usually less important debate that dilutes the one about the guy's RL fuckery.

(This may sound like I'm just vagueblogging about Neil Gaiman, but it's not—I've seen it many times and this specific post was actually set off by seeing virtually identical discourse about a completely different, long-dead guy that had one valid criticism buried in a sea of irrelevant and IMO untrue tangents that did nothing to elevate the point worth talking about.)

[justauthoring]

a promise he'll keep.

requested! -> also “who did this to you” with astarion would go absolutely bonkers. food for thought requested by! -> @the-sunflower-room

a/n -> thank you for your request! i saw your other one as well and definitely plan on writing it hopefully soon! also! i literally have been in love with this man since the game came out but im so nervous about writing for him i never gained the courage... tho, meeting neil yesterday made it feel like its only write i finally commit and write to him!

tw -> mention of blood, bruises and cuts/violence

pairing -> astarion x f!reader/tav

blood poured from the rather large cut across the side of your forehead, staining your skin and seeping into the tiny cuts littered across your cheek and jaw. bruises lined your neck, in the shape of a hands, and astarion was sure that the rest of your body mimicked the damage across your face.

armour torn, shaking and hurt, astarion's heart burns with a rage he's not felt in a long time.

long ago had he forgotten about the bloodlust of fighting. long ago had he healed from the trauma of his past. years had passed since astarion had first met you and years had passed since the both of you, along with the rest of your companions, healed yourselves from the parasites in your mind and effectively, saved the world.

your bodies had never quite healed though. the trauma of what you'd both experienced had never faded and most likely never would. you'd both accepted that as a fact of your lives and used each other as a means of healing from it.

it had been years since astarion has seen you bloodied and hurt like this, and it feels ten times worse then it ever had before. never a fighter, the second you'd no longer been forced to fight for survival, astarion knows you'd given up that part of your life.

you were strong. there was no doubting that. you could hold yourself and you'd proved that well enough given what you'd done for the world and most importantly, your companions. more than anything, you'd proved that with how you saved astarion from his tormentor and the horror of his past.

but you look so vulnerable in that moment; broken and hurt and bruised and his chest tightens, nails digging into the palms of his hands as the rage coarses through him, burning his veins and has him desperate to make whoever hurt you pay.

painfully.

"who..." and his words hesitate, the fire his chest making it hard to find his words. he doesn't want you to think any of his anger is directed at you... "who did this to you?"

you twitch at his words, arms coming around to hold yourself as you shiver, hesitating.

astarion's face falls.

taking a step towards you, he reaches out for you, hands moving to cup your cheeks, gently and wary of your wounds. he worries you'll pull away, given how afraid you are, but you know astarion and recognize his touch and some of the rage fades with concern and love for you as you lean into his touch.

his fingers work to brush the blood from your face, get rid of the dirt and grime that clings to your skin and tries to soothe you.

your eyes flutter shut in response.

"i'm sorry," astarion whispers. "i'm sorry, i don't mean to scare you."

you shake your head, humming in disagreement. "you didn't scare me."

astarion hates the way your voice trembles.

"i don't want you getting hurt for me," you explain. "you don't deserve that."

and astarion shakes his head. "it doesn't matter if it's you." he assures and he frowns when he realizes he might've not made that clear enough. he had a lot to make up for if you think that he wouldn't do anything for you. "i can't let them get away with hurting you like this."

"i'm okay," you try to deny.

astarion just tightens his grip on you, not enough to hurt you, of course, but enough to pull your attention on him. "you're not," he argues, desperate for you to understand how much it pains him to see you hurt like this. "you're bleeding, y/n. and fuck... you're hurt, badly. it breaks my heart to see you like this."

your eyes fall on him at that. wide eyes meeting his own as your lips part, as if shocked by his admission. maybe shocked wasn't the word—he likes to think the expression on your face is one of reassurance at how much his heart burns with love for you.

the tears that you'd been holding back fall then, your bravety and strength fading at astarion's warming and soothing words. they build at the corner of your eyes and astarion is quick to brush them away.

"i'll never let them hurt you again," he promises then, meaning every word of what he says. he says them with confidence, desperation and sincerity, eyes softening with a plea as he holds onto you, afraid you might slip from his very fingers. "them or anyone else."

your hand grabs his, squeezing.

"i know," you whisper, "this isn't your fault."

he just shakes his head; "it's whoever did this to you's fault," he assures, although the twinge of guilt that festers in his belly is undeniable. he should've been there with you, keeping you safe; even if you knew you were capable of keeping yourself safe... having him there would've assured him and would've stopped this from ever happening.

"y/n," he calls again, voice soft, measured and even as he stares into your eyes and doesn't let you pull away. "who did this to you?"

and your lips part, breathing shakily but there's an ease that washes across your expression and then the names of the men who hurt you come pouring from your lips.

astarion memorizies them, keeps them trapped in his mind as he nods. "thank you." and he is thankful. thankful that you trust him to do what he'd promised. thankful that you know he won't fail you.

"i'll make it better, okay?" he whispers, his thumb stroking across your cheek as he pulls you into his arms, a hand falling on the back of your neck to press you into his chest. "i promise."

you hum your response, leaning into his touch before letting him guide towards your home so he can dress and clean your wounds.

and most importanly, shower you in the love you deserve.

[octaviasdread]

Mrs Perry, the 50s Housewife & Neil

This entire post is inspired by a discord discussion so I can't take all the credit, but Mrs Perry gives off alllll the signals of a 50s housewife reliant on emotional suppression and prescription pills to cope with the demands of post-war society.

'They used barbiturates to aid in sleep, minor tranquilizers to ease anxiety, and amphetamines to help lose weight and boost energy. [...] Women’s pill consumption signals their difficulties, at times, before feminism of the era explicitly touched upon them' - Erin Brown, You Go to My Head: Women's Prescription Pill Use in Postwar America

Her smoking while she waits for Neil to return with Mr Perry from the play suggests a habit to cope with stress. It’s also notable that she hurries to put it out. Is this a further sign she’s smoking to relieve anticipation, or is it something she doesn’t want Neil to see?

And Mr Perry? His treatment of her can partly be explained by patriarchal family structure. What Mr Perry wants, Mr Perry gets. He is head of the family, and takes the lead in family communications with Neil, so much that beneath Mr Perry's repeated use of 'we,' it's difficult to discern how Neil's mother feels.

In the scenes set in the Perry house, we mainly see the family in Mr Perry's study. This direct parallel to Nolan's office INSIDE Neil's home emphasises the rule of authority over his life, and the extent of how trapped he is.

The parallel is important because Nolan's office is shown as a place of punishment for the students, and a reinforcement of their lack of agency.

More specifically, the deleted scenes show school clubs being dictated to the boys as they stand in front of Nolan’s desk. This confirms that school annual - and the editorial position that Neil earned - is taken from him on Mr Perry's whim, just as his whole life is ripped away the next time he stands beside a desk in Mr Perry’s office.

The hurt and betrayal Neil feels in these early scenes is hidden from Nolan, and he submits to the authority of his father. But Neil can no longer hide his hurt by the end. He has gained and then lost too much to accept the stricter controls Mr Perry is imposing.

So what does Mrs Perry do when faced with her son's obvious distress? Almost nothing.

Her worry for her son is real, but she shows no true support that Neil can rely on. He looks to her for help and comfort twice. The first time, she looks down, then back at Neil, and says nothing. The second time is after she begins to speak, but her one attempt fails, and she falls back into passivity.

She stands aside. It's as if Mrs Perry isn't really there, stuck behind an invisible boundary observing the damage as the scene unfolds.

It's only when Mr Perry leaves that she provides some fleeting comfort - but this comfort doesn't feel present to Neil. She doesn't articulate her support, doesn't touch him, or make signs that Neil can grasp without doubting her belief in him.

Instead of prioritising her son, she follows Mr Perry without complaint, leaving Neil to grieve alone for the loss of everything he holds dear.

This tiny scene says so much about the dysfunctional family dynamic Neil has been raised in. It's impossible to say when it started, or when his mother stopped advocating for Neil's emotional wellbeing, but there's definitely a bond - however strained - between mother and son that isn't shared with Mr Perry.

As @desire-mona has said, Mr Perry uses his wife and possibly her health to guilt and manipulate Neil into following his demands. There's definitely an argument to made for Mrs Perry having fragile health. If this is physical, or a 'nervous' ailment historically diagnosed in housewives, or a combination of the two isn't clear. Whatever it is, she must not be upset.

This puts a lot of pressure on a child, and Neil (understandably) complies under the threat. As the above scene implies, Neil is blamed, and likely blames himself, if Mrs Perry's symptoms get worse around the time he disobeys, or just fails to please his parents.

The Perrys different reactions to stress are clearest at the discovery of Neil's death. The shock causes Mr Perry to bypass anger (although anger returns in his search for someone - i.e. Keating - to blame) and his care for Neil surfaces. This is the first time his care is shown through sympathetic emotion rather than demands for Neil to succeed.

Mrs Perry hurtles into denial. Her body is reacting to distress, but she can't comprehend reality. 'He's alright,' she repeats, retreating into a fragile imagined safety to cope.

@pencileraser1 has also linked the parallels between Mrs Perry and Neil smoking to the possibility of an inherited mental illness.

Being raised in an emotionally abusive household, and internalising the shame of not conforming to Mr Perry's ideal would be enough to contribute to depression in Neil. But I think both mother and son could share dissatisfaction and a desire for escapism.

When faced with the constraints of the larger system they live under, their mental illness plays out in different ways.

Neil finds a healthier outlet behind the backs of authority through the club, acting, and finding an adult mentor to support him, while Mrs Perry has little to no opportunities to escape the confines of the home or the scrutiny of her community.

Once these opportunities (and coping mechanisms) are taken from him, Neil doesn't turn to smoking, escapist poetry, or other forms of temporary numbing. He's seen his parents suburban lives, seen the life they want for him, and perhaps he can't and won't live in quiet compliance the way Mrs Perry does.

I wonder how Mrs Perry copes afterwards? Does she see a decent therapist? Separate (but not divorce) from Mr Perry? Does she take pills and numb herself further? I don't think I want to know.

[amorisastrum]

Queer subtext in dead poets society

Formality sucks I'm never writing anything this formal for you lot again /nm. I had more points and then I got stressed out and upset and I didn't want this to become worse than I already think it is. There is no conclusion! Sorry! I will bring up my future points in future posts with a more rambly style because I am clearly not made to write stuff like this. I have tried my very best to do this as well as I can considering my current circumstances so I hope you all enjoy it!

The 1989 film “Dead Poets Society,” directed by Peter Weir and written by Tom Schulman, is a coming-of-age film that follows the stories of a group of boys at an American all-boys school in 1959. It explores themes of individualism, conformity, the pursuit of passion, and living a good life. Many fans believe “Dead Poets Society” has strong queer undertones and queer subtext, particularly following the two main characters (Todd Anderson and Neil Perry). I believe that the thought of queer subtext adds to the depth of the narrative and adds to the beauty of the story it is telling. In this essay I aim to dissect the queer undertones present throughout the story.

Narrative themes:

As previously stated, the themes explored within the film are individuality, conformity, the pursuit of passion and living a good life - Or rather “seizing the day” - but how do these themes link in with the idea of being queer?

The themes of individuality and conformity pose a significant contrast to one another. We see this juxtaposition several times throughout the film. Individuality is shown through the rebellion of the boys and Mr. Keating’s unorthodox ways of teaching, while the theme of conformity is shown through the presentation of the school and how the other teachers, as well as the parents, act. At the beginning of the film, we see the school’s four values, one of these being tradition. Some may argue that tradition is a confining value, preventing these boys from expressing themselves authentically. Mr Keating, on the other hand, is pushing them to have some degree of freedom and to accept who they really are. This could symbolise the conflict between heteronormativity and homosexuality.

Mr Keating is a key part in the breakdown of traditional values for his students. He is encouraging them to pursue their own interests. In Neil’s case, this is theatre. Mr Keating wants these boys to be individuals and to explore their own identity, ignoring the rules that are put in place for them. This is what queer people have been doing through history.

Filming and writing decisions:

We know that in this film everything is of importance. This is shown through the consistent foreshadowing (such as the shot of Neil as Mr Keating is explaining that everyone will die). So, if everything is of importance, why would a shot of Neil Perry staring at Todd in such awe be included? This film constantly shows through foreshadowing that everything is important, so to include such a shot for no reason would seem unusual. With the closeness and the longing looks shown between both Todd and Neil, it would seem there is something more than just a friendship between the two of them.

As well as this, the extremity of Todd’s reaction after Neil’s death is quite peculiar. Todd had the most intense reaction out of all the poets towards Neil’s death, despite having only known him for a couple months. This suggests that there was something much deeper in the boy's relationship than just friendship.

Cultural references:

Throughout this story, Walt Whitman is mentioned consistently, posing a significant purpose towards the story. Out of all the poets mentioned and referred to, he is the most often brought up. Whitman himself is notoriously known for writing homoerotic poetry. This could symbolise the queerness of characters within the film with lines such as “I’m being chased by Walt Whitman!” spoken by Neil, in direct reference to Todd.

I apologise greatly for not being able to do an amazing essay. There's lots going on for me at the minute so the stress and upset that it started to put me through was simply not worth it. I will continue to share my thoughts and ideas but good lord they will not be formal. This took a lot of my energy and I'd rather write in a more talkative tone, as I would normally! I hope you guys understand.

[thesherrinfordfacility]

Honestly? The most striking thing about the sideburns and other continuity errors isn't even how bizarre they are, how numerous or how they mostly seem like easily fixable things. It's Neil's non-answers! Except for the missing fifteen minutes in the Final Fifteen I don't believe he's outright called any of them continuity errors even when that's surely the simplest option. Of course, even odds he's doing it just to wind the fandom up, but that still leaves a fifty percent chance there might be a Reason. Or, if it is specifically to wind us up and make us chase our own tails, you could argue that makes it a red herring. In which case, what Clues are the continuity errors meant to distract us from?

hey anon!!!✨ okay so here's where im just basically going to talk about good omens in general, both seasons, because honestly? im completely with you, and i think that rationale is bang on the money. its the whole reason why i try to look at outside, sometimes blatantly in a different direction, to what the show (ignoring the book for a hot minute) is telling us.

s2 in particular, but i'll include s1 slightly, feels like it really leans into misdirection as a narrative technique - the red herring. as you rightly pointed out, we have the baby swap/three card monte in s1. we have three cowrie shells in s2. we have the goats hidden as crows, where (by my count) you see two, possibly three, flying off in the background behind crowley. we have the three children hidden as lizards (lots of threes which is interesting but not my Point rn). the bullet catch. aziraphale distracting furfur with the envelope whilst he hides the photograph up his sleeve. probably others that ive forgotten.

so, suffice to say, it's a fairly major part of the story, and this is where i come to my point; in my opinion, tricks are being played on us as the audience, and we ourselves are being led by misdirection. now, im sure some of these may turn out to be true, but the below are a couple of examples of things from s2 specifically that have been spoonfed to us, and therefore - i think - are not 100%, if at all, true:

crowley was a high-ranking angel/archangel

maggie is a demon because she misspelt 'urgency'

the book of life is a book, and has the ability to erase existence

the 25-lazarii miracle was successful in hiding gabriel, or was as powerful as it was because aziraphale and crowley did it together simultaneously.

i've talked about all of them in various tags, so i won't go over them, but i think we need to consider that what we've been taking as read needs further evaluation. that's not to say that one or multiple could in fact be the truth - there is, after all, the actual money card in three card monte - but im hesitant to put a guess on which one is the case.

but this does kinda come back to the batshit time travel theory - does the magic trick extend that far? or, at the very least, what is the trick being played by the varying hair length/sideburns/glasses change, if we accept that they're not factors external to the narrative? if they're deliberate, in-story choices, what is it telling us? there's the speculation that the flashbacks in s2 are skewed because they're all told from aziraphale's perspective - is possibly the case for the entire season? does that explain the colour grading?

personally, i think we're seeing more red herrings than we realise!!!✨

[invisibleicewands]

Michael Sheen: ‘I find it very hard to accept actors playing Welsh characters when they aren’t Welsh’

Has he taken the concept of authentic casting to a whole new level? Ahead of his latest BBC drama Best Interests, the star explains all

Michael Sheen has had it with the Prince of Wales. Not the man, but the title. “I think it’s ridiculous,” he says. “It’s just silly. I see no reason why the title should continue. Certainly not with someone who’s not Welsh.” 

“That’s not the majority view,” he adds, with resignation. “So, whatever the majority of people want, I’m sure will continue.” 

The star of Frost/Nixon and proud son of Port Talbot is chatting via video from a bucolic spot close to his hometown (a deer has just wandered into view), but even at a distance, it’s not hard to see that Sheen is a man ofstrong convictions.

He has spoken in the past about the opportunity to retire the title after the death of Elizabeth II, as a gesture to “put some of the wrongs of the past right”. In 2020, he returned the OBE he was “honoured” to have received in 2009 when he felt it would make him a hypocrite to give a lecture about how the English king Edward I “put a stranglehold on Wales” at the turn of the 14th century. 

When we chat, he’s about to begin shooting his TV directing debut The Way – co-created with playwright James Graham and documentary-maker Adam Curtis, about a family caught in a civil uprising, set in and around Port Talbot. The BBC project is the first from the production company that he set up with Sherlock producer Bethan Jones to focus on telling Welsh stories because, “You can shout about how bad it is, but if you want to see something be different then do it, you know?”

The 54-year-old is one of the actors of his generation, a stage star in his twenties (The Telegraph’s Charles Spencer called him “outrageously charismatic”) who went on to create unforgettable screen portraits of Tony Blair (The Queen, The Deal), Chris Tarrant (Quiz) and Brian Clough (The Damned United), alongside his David Frost in Peter Morgan’s play and film about the 1977 interviews that brought down the US president. Recently, Sheen has gained a whole new tranche of fans playing a very arch angel opposite David Tennant’s insouciant demon in Amazon’s Good Omens – not technically gay characters according to the Terry Pratchett-Neil Gaiman source novel, but seemingly in love.

Tennant and he have a natural chemistry on and off screen, Sheen says, adding that “he stops me being too grumpy”. He is a little on the grumpy side. In one exchange, in which I suggest he is a supporter of Welsh independence, he responds hotly: “Show me where it says that. I don’t believe I’ve ever said that.” Sam Mendes compared Sheen to fellow Welsh stars Anthony Hopkins and Richard Burton – “fiery, mercurial, unpredictable”. 

But he shares a warm screen chemistry with Sharon Horgan in Jack Thorne’s moving new four-part drama Best Interests. They play the parents of a child with cerebral palsy, the adorable Marnie (played by Dublin actor Niamh Moriarty), who suffers a seizure that leaves her without brain function. The couple find themselves on opposite sides of an unbearable decision: whether or not to switch off their daughter’s life support. Very few will make it through the drama without tears, but the issues it raises will be familiar to all who have followed recent legal battles over 12-year-old Archie Battersbee and baby Alfie Evans. 

Best Interests is “heartbreaking” at times, he admits, which makes the humour that he and Horgan bring to it all the more important. They hadn’t worked together before. “That relationship had to do a lot of heavy lifting. Sharon and I didn’t know each other very well … but straight from the off, we had a very similar sense of humour and made each other laugh.” Moriarty’s is a break-out performance – one scene involving make-up beautifully captures the parent-child relationship. She has cerebral palsy that affects her legs, a condition called spastic diplegia, but she’s not the only disabled actor in the piece. 

Bafta-winner Lenny Rush, 14, who in real-life has a condition that affects his growth, is brilliant as George, who sets his cap at Marnie. Mat Fraser, who plays a legal advocate in Best Interests and portrayed Shakespeare’s Richard III in 2017, has a thalidomide impairment, which likely gave him an insight into Richard’s sense of “my deformity”. 

Thorne, who experienced a chronic medical condition in his twenties, has said in the past that disabled people have been “utterly and totally” failed by the TV industry. In Best Interests, one parent of a child with a disability states baldly that people “hate” disabled people. “I think people can feel very uncomfortable around people with disabilities,” Sheen says. “A lot of the time it’s just to do with ignorance about, ‘Oh gosh, I don’t know, what should I do?’ It can make interaction quite awkward at times, and it can bring out people’s fears.”

The fact that there were several people with disabilities working on the project, he says, was striking because it brought home how rarely he had seen it before. It leads into a discussion of how far actors can credibly play identities they don’t personally inhabit. Sheen has thought about it: “You know, seeing people playing Welsh characters who are not Welsh, I find, it’s very hard for me to accept that. Not particularly on a point of principle, but just knowing that that’s not the case.

“That’s a very different end of the spectrum, but a part like Richard III is such a great character to play, it would be sad to think that that character, you know, is no longer available or appropriate for actors to play who don’t have disabilities, but that’s because I’m just not used to it yet, I suppose. Because I fully accept that I’m  not going to be playing Othello any time soon.

“Again, it’s not particularly a point of principle, but personally, I haven’t seen many actors who have come from quite privileged backgrounds being particularly compelling as people from working-class backgrounds. If you haven’t experienced something, you know, the extreme example is, well, if you haven’t murdered someone, can you play a murderer?”

In 2021, it was reported that Sheen intended to be a “not-for-profit” actor, after selling his own properties to ensure the Homeless World Cup that he had organised in Cardiff in 2019 went ahead when funders withdrew. So, what is a not-for-profit actor?

“There’s no such thing,” he says. “In that interview, I talked about how the ideal I was aiming towards was working like a not-for-profit company. When I put the money into the Homeless World Cup, since then I only owe money, so in terms of profits, there are no profits. I put as much of the money I make as I possibly can into either funding and supporting what other people are doing that I believe in, or starting up projects myself.” 

It’s a measure of Sheen’s confidence that he knows the parts will keep coming. He has become a father again in his 50s; he and his partner, 28-year-old Swedish actor Anna Lundberg, have two young daughters. “My knees creak a lot more,” he says. “It’s a lot harder to get up and down off the floor when you’re playing with the baby.” 

Sheen also has a grown-up daughter, Lily Mo Sheen, 24, from an earlier relationship with British actress Kate Beckinsale. “When my eldest daughter was born, I was still trying to make my way in my career and having to make harder choices about whether to work away from home and how much time to be away and all that stuff,” he says. “This time around, that’s not as difficult as I’m more established as an actor. Physically, it’s hard. But the one thing that is always the same is, you know, poo doesn’t smell any better.”

[parlerenfleurs]

Well, I watched Good Omens season 2, and not gonna lie, I think it kinda sucks.

Perhaps season 3 will be more interesting, but this season is... meh. It's cheesy, ill-directed, people's (side-characters) reactions don't make much sense or at least aren't presented well, and thus they're not believable. I felt like watching children play together, deciding as they go "And you're this and you'll do this and then..." without much care for consistency or well-rounded characters or narrative.

And furthermore (SPOILER AHEAD I'M SPOILING A LOT BEWARE YOU CAN STOP READING NOW OKAY? COOL TAKE CARE BYE), furthermore, then, that kiss made no sense to me. I'm happy to follow their feelings/character arc unfold, but come on. How heavily must they hammer it on?

Yeah we get it, Beelzebub and Gabriel are a parallel, they fall in love then fade to their happily ever-after in the most contrived way ever (why aren't they threatened with being removed from the Book of life? Does the dominion of Heaven and Hell, having created the whole damn universe at the behest of their so-called omnipotent god, not extend to one solar system over? Come on now. I thought the whole plan was to go somewhere Heaven and Hell wouldn't look for eloped deserters, but here they announce it! If anyone just needed to leave Earth to desert their respective armies with no consequences, everyone would do it).

Yeah, we get it, Aziraphale is still not ready to accept that Heaven is not what he thinks it is, and to be with Crowley's side, their side, unconditionally while Crowley is fully ready and wants nothing more, and has for a long time now. (And actually this is to me the only worthwhile theme that makes sense, because of course Crowley, having been cast away, doesn't have anything to lose anymore. Aziraphale, who can still be taken back as a good prodigal son, can't see how that's something Crowley doesn't want anymore, because the scales have fallen from his eyes already, because he has lost everything for real and can now see that both sides are just as bad.)

But?? Why kiss??? I liked that they are indeed not human and love in a different, non-physical way. And I suppose it's a luxury to feel that way, because now if I do want human love and queer kissing, well, I've got it portrayed beautifully elsewhere. But for Neil Gaiman to insist they're not humans, don't love like humans, and then do this? Doesn't feel very consistent to me. I ship them, of course I do, but words and gestures would have sufficed. Would have been not just enough but more in-character to me.

But well. I don't have the full author vision, perhaps the next page of the story makes this make more sense. I'm not convinced but I can be patient and give it a chance.

But this season's flaws are here to stay. Nina and Maggie's "romance" was... weird. First, Nina was kinda mean to Maggie. She didn't owe it to her to be all smiles and all that, but as a spectator I can't understand why Maggie is so hung up on someone who treats her that way, who is so utterly uninterested and dismissive. Second... Maggie was being creepy. I presume that was not the intention, but that's what the acting/directing, and the way the scenes/dialogues were set up that made me feel that way. She was transparently interested, and continued to bring it up even when it was clear Nina didn't care for it. She had to tell her in no uncertain terms and then Maggie still wanted to talk about it and know if it was her fault Lindsay was being an abusive jerk... WHY was everyone so invested in everyone else's love life? And why did everyone talk about it so readily? Doesn't anyone value their privacy? Why would Nina tell Crowley that Lindsay just broke up with her and why would she give her opinion on his love life so freely? When I have a broken heart and want to go home and cry I don't really feel the urge to refuse social engagements with acquaintances by telling them the naked truth about it, but maybe that's just me. I also don't feel like telling said acquaintances that they should really get their shit together because they look so much like a couple from a few meters away and a handful of moments witnessed. But maybe that's just me.

The only sane moment in this whole mess was when Nina and Maggie come to tell Crowley that they shouldn't have stuck their noses in their business and that it's nuts to expect someone who just broke up to get into another relationship, but then right on the heel of that they once again confidently declare this and that about Crowley's feelings and what he should do about it. Like, excuse me??? You have barely seen them both together or hell, apart, and suddenly you're a stage 5 close friend and are an expert on how things stand between them??

Also just generally the comedy was often heavy-handed, the in-jokes unsubtle, the romances formulaic, the pace torpid... I was frankly bored from the introduction of the first episode (I did hope it would get better, and it was at times, but not much), displeased with the retcon of their first meeting, and wondering where Gaiman's excellent writing had gone.

Also I do wonder what Crowley was even doing lugging piles of books around only to throw them carelessly in corners. Aziraphale should have been very upset about that. He took good care of the Bentley, there was no reason to trash his beloved bookshop.

I feel like I've mostly lost my time, and that's too bad. I imagine a lot of people are ecstatic about the "representation", but I would have loved more substance and less... I don't know... I don't even know what they were trying to do here.

[okgee]

TW: discussion about suicide

Neil and how lighting has been used to portray his mental state and happiness have been rotting my brain for too long, so now i will ramble about it without any actual knowledge on lighting or filmmaking.

We can see that the more lighting hits Neil the more happy he is. Light is used as to show when something is good in this movie. So darkness means unhappiness, discomfort and hopelessness among other mainly negative feelings.

When the play starts Neil and the stage are lit up. He is feeling happy and surrounded by things that make him happy. He is literally living his dream. As Neil's emotions change during the play so does the lighting.

We can see the change in his expression and body language, but also in the lighting when he sees his father in the crowd. Before noticing him, he is basking in warm lighting grinning from ear to ear. There is also light coming from every direction showing us Neil is feeling amazing and the environment is just adding to that. Then he notices his father and the grin immediately falls off his face. Neil withdraws himself to the shadows to hide himself. Going to the dark by himself shows us that he doesn't feel safe being happy, living his dream with his father around. Neil has to consciously takes himself away from the light(his happiness) to feel safe. There is still some light coming from the background, because this is the place and the environment where Neil feels good and his father isn't able to take that fully away from him.

After Neil has seen his father and goes back to the stage, he is surrounded by darkness, but he himself is lit up by colder light. He has decided not to hide himself, but he feels exposed being there on the stage because of his father. Thus why he is the only visible thin on the stage. Colder lighting lighting him up could mean that he doesn't feel happy in that moment. As the scene goes on and he gets more into the acting and to his role, the background get progressively more brighter. Also the lighting that's hitting him gets a lot warmer, showing how much more comfortable he is feeling. Neil starts look at his father when he starts to get more comfortable. He is trying to communicate with his father trough Puck's lines.

So after Neil's performance, he goes to the backstage looking ecstatic, lively and relieved. He did it and he did it good. Neil is looking up towards the ceiling and he is bathing in light. The dark backround and colder lighting tells us that he isn't feeling really comfortable though, since he just performed in front of his father. This doesn't matter to Neil, having performed and succeeded at it, brings him so much joy that he doesn't care about feeling a bit uncomfortable. That shows us that this is what he wants to do, we haven't seen him this happy in the entire movie. He is living his dream in this moment and it's just as good as he expected.

Now we have the scene where Neil puts on the crown for the last time. He looks hopeless and sad. But Neil is also not hiding, walks towards the vold light coming from outside letting it lit him up and he accepts his fate. He is living through the memories of his probably most happiest evening ever, and then letting them go. The background is completely dark, he doesn't like being there, that place doesn't feel like a comfortable home to him. Unlike in the backstage, he is now slowly looking down and ending up chin to his chest eyes closed. Neil is giving up on the hope that he could live the life he wants and thinks that killing himself will be the only way out. His face is completely shadowed, he is not lively himself that we are used to in the movie anymore.

When Neil is on his way to go to his father's study, we can only see his silhouette. He is coming from suffocating darkness to cold unhappy but relieving light. Neil is walking towards light, the relief of death and not having to live a life he doesn't want. He himself is almost fully dark though showing, that death doesn't make him happy. The little light that does hit him though, could be the knowledge of soon coming escape and relief. Acting is so big part of him that he can't imagine living without it, so he doesn't. Death is the last resort to him.

And here he is, alone, in the dark and surrounded by his father's belongings. He is fully lit up by cold light, he is not happy but is feeling something positive (maybe relief?). The dark room is not comfortable or good for Neil, we know that he strives in light. And he knows himself, he knows he couldn't live the life he most likely would end up having. And this is how he resolves it.

Also when Neil's father wakes up during the night and he walks through their home, he puts on lights as he goes. This shows how their home is somewhere where Neil's father feels comfortable and good, unlike he son who walked through the dark house. They see different things as good and Neil's father can't see that, and in the end that is why things ended the way the did with Neil.

[something-tofightfor]

Hi! I’m going to ask you something that my brother and i were talking about last night and hopefully it makes sense.

Do you think TLOU would have had the ratings and success it has if Pedro Pascal wasn’t cast as Joel?

Now do not get me wrong, Pedro plays an amazing Joel and brings so much into him and he does not disappoint one bit and my brother agrees (he plays the games so it’s fun to watch it with him and hear his thoughts). We were just wondering if it would be as amazing as it is without Pedro Pascal in it because so many of his fans just love him (like love him. Intensely 😅) and really really really sexualize him to the point where it’s kind of cringy (like calling him “Daddy”, that kind of makes me uncomfortable for him). Then having like, something new to do that with (TLOU)? Does that make sense?

I don’t mean any disrespect to him and his work and acting, he is incredibly talented and his work in the theater adds to his amazing range of characters he’s played and I truly admire him for all of that. My brother and I were just wondering about that. I hope that my question makes sense, haha sometimes it’s easier to say what you mean and hard to type out what you mean. I feel like I failed miserably haha but again, we were just genuinely curious and I wanted to know what you thought.

So I think that it would still be doing really well - especially if the only change was the actor portraying Joel (and he was replaced by another actor suited for the part and not just someone that resembles game Joel).

The game is one of the most universally loved and accepted games for the PS3. There are more than 20 million copies of it out there in the world, meaning that there are millions and millions of people that love the story and want to see it brought to life - and there are plenty more that are always looking for another show to watch on a weekly basis.

I think that the biggest thing TLOU had as a negative was/is that there have been NO solid live action adaptations of video games. (Sonic is the exception, and even that is somewhat animated), and with the absolute tragedy in every way that was Uncharted, it's an understandable fear for people - since Neil was involved in that one, too.

Pedro is a phenomenal Joel. He is perfect for the role, and the fact that he isn't just trying to emulate Troy for a copy/paste performance is admirable. I think a lot of other actors - despite the instructions from Neil and Craig - would have been very afraid to take that sort of direction, and it would have felt like a poor imitation when they inevitably played it too close to the game. (That's not to say it wouldn't have still been successful - since so many people WANTED and expected them to stick much more closely to the game)

I've played both games, and so have my boyfriend and brother, and all of us are in agreement that it's the right way to handle it (so far, that could change as we go deeper into the season, but I doubt it) and that the differences and changes have all been worthwhile.

It's impossible to compare the two in every aspect, though. The game is the game and the show is the show, and each is incredible in its own right, and there are reasons to love each version of Joel.

I love Pedro - have since Game of Thrones and will continue to love him until the end of time, but even if he hadn't been Joel, I would have been super excited to tune in each week. That isn't the case for the Pedro fans that are watching solely because he's in it - or at least it wasn't until the first episode. I know of at least 3 people personally that were fans of Pedro but not the game, and they've said that after the first couple weeks it's not just him that's making the show interesting and bringing them back, it's the story itself.

There are certainly people that are watching because they want to thirst over Pedro on their screens for 9 weeks. And those people will follow him on to the next project, and once TLOU has ended, they won't think about it again except to think about TV Joel. That happens. And honestly, even though the Daddy bullshit is total cringe and the "controversially young girlfriend" takes are really embarrassing for the people that post them repeatedly, I want to thank them for making it possible for me to see my favorite games get the treatment that they deserve in an adaptation because of the fact that they ARE tuning in specifically for Pedro.

HBO most definitely was willing to throw more money and attention toward this project because of the star power they landed for the show. They understand how large his reach has gotten since GOT and what an asset he can be to the success of the show. He's definitely pulling in a ton more viewers than someone less famous/in demand would have, but I don't think that the Pedro fans are the bulk of the viewers by any means.

Ratings and viewership would have been different if he wasn't involved, but I don't think that (in most cases) a different Joel would have tanked the project by any means. There are a few actors that would have made me less excited to watch it (Matthew McConaughey is a great actor, but he's not Joel, and Jensen Ackles as Joel would have made me roll my eyes for 9 weeks straight because that man is nice to look at but ....) and a couple that I can think of that would have made it damn near impossible for me to enjoy it, but I would have given it a shot no matter what - and so would a lot of other people that were tuning in because they were fans of the game first.

[rise-my-angel]

what did you think about the ending of tlou?? and are you excited for season 2?? would love to hear some of that wonderful Mimi insight!! ☺️☺️

Okay, so I consider this season a closed story much like the original game. A story designed to end where it ends and the actions in front of us exist in their own merit and not that of future set up or outside sources. Meaning I do not consider events included in tlou2 to be canon, and I also don't take whatever neil/craig/usually game voice actors say about the show as truth or canon either. Beacuse a lot of what they say is purposley trying to make you think these events will lead naturally to what will be season 2 which is the second game.

I disregard the second game because I think it is completely illfitting to this universe story that forced characters to change to make it fit. And so, I am only looking at this show soley on the same way I did the first game. As its own unique thing that does not need a sequel.

That being said, (under a read more cus God forbid i make a post about this show thats not 8 thousand words long)

I love how the hospital events were framed not as tense and brutal, but painful and emotional. When the game came out everyone talked about how crazy that sequence was, but here its so interesting that its flipped. In the game you play this out yourself so you end up putting your emotions onto the scene but here we're forced to endure that this Joel isn't fueled by anger but a gut wrenching desperation. And the new added context that Joel losing Sarah drove him to attempt suicide paints it in a new light as well as direct confirmation that Ellie was not told anything and was drugged against her will.

Joel isn't just saving himself. He told Ellie JUST before they got seperated that he was so sure he wanted and was ready to die, but by some miracle, he flinched and lived long enough to heal and find purpose through her. Joel sees Ellie's pain. And he realizes, that Ellie has been manipulated into thinking that she has to do this and her own trauma might be used against her. Its why he doesnt respond at Marlenes comment to ask what she would choose.

Joel knows that he healed and that Marlene has not only taken Ellie's ability to flinch awat, but that she is the reason Ellie thinks she is the worlds only hope. Joel knows Ellie can't choose for herself, because Marlene is metaphorically holding her in place. Ensuring she won't flinch.

So Joel knows, he has to flinch for her. And I refuse to say he was wrong in lying because he is clearly not proud of himself for it. But, I think he's waiting. Waiting for Ellie to be more ready, to see that light he fell in love with return to her eyes and then they can talk. Joel wants to heal that guilt in Ellie before they talk about what happened, so that when she finds out the wholw truth, she is ready to accept Joels perspective and not be stuck in this suicidal ideation that Marlene tried to create.

Also, Ellie not only had full plans for what she and Joel would do after (i.e moving to Jackson as a real home and starting to live like a real family with Joel) , but she herself had doubts. In episode 6 she asks with very distant emotion and clear doubt whether or not the vaccine works and she doesn't say any more about it beacuse they and up talking about Sam. Ellie not only didn't sign up to die, she wasn't sure it would work.

I personally think Ellie wanted to finish this at the end, partially to make Joel proud. The things they'd been through, and on multiple occasions she tries to pretend shes stronger then she is (crying after shooting that guy only to wipe her tears away and pretend shes cool about it when Joel comes in the room). She now knows what they have but she wants to make him proud that she didn't give up. She has been quiet and nervous since entering Salt Lake City to the point Joel asks her about it and then when he gently says she can change her mind shes caught. She wants the only father shes ever known to be proud that she saved the world and caught between Marlene telling her it all falls on her shoulders alone.

People seem to mostly agree that Ellie at the end knows Joel is lying, but doesn't push it. But where I disagree is when they say her trust is broken. Its not. I think shes quiet on the way to Jackson because shes upset Joel is lying and she's also trying desperately to figure out what could have happened in the hospital that Joel lies about the entire thing. And I think her saying okay at the end isn't really to Joel.

Its that she decides, it's okay that he lied. It's okay because she trusts that Joel did what he did to protect her beacuse he has always done that from day one. Its why when Joel loses it in episode 1 Ellie has a torn look about her. The only person whose ever defended her like that is Riley but that was in a far more kid vs kid protecting the girl she likes manner. Joel was different then that and even from other adults.

She doesnt know why he did it much like she doesnt know why Joel is lying to her. But it's okay. Beacuse now she knows for sure its not angry or malicious. This time she knows its from a place of love and I think Ellie starts to heal from this point on.

Joel was right to do what he did, he was right to lie to a traumatized child to not add to what he knows is already survivors guilt and I think Ellies trust never wavers.

Ellie knows Joel better in the show then the game because they open up to each other much earlier and theres much more new added context to it. Theres no distrust here.

The lie isn't a set up for future problems. The lie is Joel wants to keep the worst from her until he's sure she isn't still trauma ridden and Ellie not only decides she still trusts Joel. But I think she understands why Joel lied and it only serves to strengthen it.

Shared traumatic experiences do not tear apart. It bonds peoe together.

Last thoughts: I think the flashback with Anna is legitimate but I think Marlenes flashback is purposley scued memory to justify her actions in present day. I don't think the umbilical cord conversation happened at all. I think Marlene is inventing things to eellivate the guilt of her own monstrous actions. Also I apply real world science here because its fun, and I can say for sure no amount of experiments or tests on Ellie could produce a vaccine. Its impossible and fungal infections do not act the way viruses or bacterial infections do. I think Marlene is just desperate to win a losing war and by doing this I think she is not evil but has genuinly deluded herself into thinking that she can do the impossible. And I think she purposley found the only doctor who agrees to do this, because absolutely no doctor or scientist worth their salt would think Ellies immunity had anything to do with making a cure and his moral corruption to kill a child is far more monstrous then anything Joel did all season. So the vaccine in my opinion is bogus, I think its just the delusional actions of a group of failed rebels clinging to any power even if its just having power of a childs life. Its all bogus. The first two episodes started clearly that by the time the outbreak happened, not only was there absolutely no evidence of a cure or vaccine possible, but on outbreak day they didn't even know that the cordyceps jumped the species barrier. There is no cure.

But society is already healing. Jackson is proof that its not power or control that heals. It's love. Love and respect. Funny enough the only other place that works is Boston, which tells me that its not FEDRA itself thats the problem, its the individuals in charge. We see it in Kong in episode 7, FEDRA sees thenselves exactly like the fireflies do. But they are both wrong. Beacuse its not with violence and command does Jackson work, its community and freedom. Hell even the indigenous couple proves that. There wasnt even any animosity for Joel pointing a gun at them beacuse they all understood that the way normal peolle survive is through supporting eachother. The man immediately apologizes about being dismissive of his brother because support is what holds life together.

Summary cus I talk too much: I don't consider any future games, existing sequels, or future seasons to be canon. The Last of Us was never intended to have a future. It was a closed story of healing through love and I think the show showed this between Joel and Ellie better then the game did and thats where I'd prefer the story stay.

(.......ignore that my longest series is literally me continuing the story....i didnt base my story off the cycle of horrifc theme of hate and vengeful violence based on the Isreal/Palestine contlict I continued the theme of healing through love so im allowed to write more of this story beacuse i didnt decide that the story about love triumphing hate and violence ends with love causing hate and violence.....)

[larkral]

AFTG Thoughts

My very important thoughts on AFTG (having now finished the series). Organized by sections as: Exy, non-Andreil relationships, Adult real life logistics, and other strong but uncategorizable feelings.

I am having lots of Andreil feelings as well, but this is not them. This is the other things. My other very strong takeaways.

Exy

Exy would absolutely for fucking sure not be an Olympic sport, or a 60k seat stadium NCAA sport after ~20 years of game play. Absolutely not. I played Roller Derby for 5 years. Modern Roller Derby is a sport with a meaningful history and following and regulation bodies, and extremely amazing athletes. This isn’t a perfect case study, given that derby is grassroots, and Exy is meant to have been fully designed by 2 people, but this was an area I had to very intentionally suspend my disbelief whenever it came up.

This book also absolutely would not be as compelling to me as a non-sports-person if it were about a real sport. Because listen, I love lacrosse and I appreciate hockey and I nod casually in the direction of soccer/football, but using a made up sport made this book approachable and interesting for me. I didn’t have to think “is this a real reference I need to know more about to earnestly appreciate this plot?” Because nope. It for sure wouldn’t be. Also I didn’t have to attempt to overcome my sports people prejudices/stereotypes, because I don’t have any of those about Exy.

The refs are *outside* the court? Sus.

That plexi has to get very smudgey very quickly. How do they clean it? This seems like a problem for spectators and (see above) refs.

Why is it called Exy? I don’t hate it, it’s just like...such a prescription drug name. 

Non-Andreil relationships

Kudos to this series for having not a lot of relationship drama aside from...you know, the big one. I appreciate that this series wasn’t rife with drama in relationships

However: long distance relationships are so dramatic and hard and I don’t believe that Kevin/Thea and Nicky/Erik would have survived the series unscathed. I didn’t want to actually have to read more about either of those relationships, but neither struck me as particularly real.

Betsey/Wymack/Abby -- thruple. C’mon.

Adult real life logistics

Oh my god, no insurance agent ever in the history of real life would ever think that Andrew’s car wasn’t totaled after being vandalized as described. They’d cut him a check in like...two days. Though also as someone who has had a car totaled this year, it’s a fucking hassle no matter what.

Who is maintaining Nicky’s house!? Houses are energy pits. If he owns that house, someone needs to be up in there changing the furnace filter and flushing the water heater and oiling the garage door springs. And he sure isn’t.

Other strong but uncategorizable feelings

Before reading this series I was like “why would any person attend school and be there primarily in order to play a sport” but actually I kind of get it now?

KEVIN you are not supposed to meaningfully sweat for several weeks after getting a tattoo!

Why would a building planning official accept sleeping quarters underground that didn’t have egress? I guess bribes from gangsters. But c’mon. The Raven’s Nest would be condemned immediately!

I can believe that Nicky is fluent in German, and that Jean and Kevin are fluent in French, but the rest of them almost certainly wouldn’t be fluent enough to carry out the conversations as written. Totally willing to suspend my disbelief on it, though.

Man that Nathaniel/Neil section? I died. I knew what was happening and it still brought me to my knees.

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Episode 93 Transcript: That's Literally Lucifer, Dude

[intro guitar music]

G: Hello, it's Grey.

C: Hello, it's Crystal.

G: And this is Busty Asian Beauties, a Supernatural commentary podcast where I, someone who has seen this show many, many times...

C: And I, someone who only knows the show through social media, discuss every single episode of Supernatural from start to finish. Also, we are both Asian.

G: Both Asian! For today's episode, we will be discussing Season 5, Episode 11: "Sam, Interrupted," written by Andrew Dabb and Daniel Loflin, directed by James L. Conway.

C: None of these people should have careers anymore, [G laughs] I personally feel. Daniel Loflin's out at some point, right? [G: Yeah.] Like, I don't remember him. Only- Until Season 8? Well.

G: Isn't their next episode, like, fucking [overlapping] "Hammer of the Gods"? [G laughs] People will write anything!

C: No, they do "Dark Side of the Moon" first.

G: Yeah. Actually, this episode, you know how sometimes you're like, you don't know what is good and what is bad in media? [C: Sure.] I mean, like, for me, a lot of my- It's very rare that I'm like, "it's good" or "it's bad," except when, you know, we're podcasting about it, such as in Supernatural or Good Omens. Most of the time, it's like, "Did I feel a certain way watching it?" blah blah blah. That's the more, you know, that's the easier thing to respond to as a watcher of something, right? This one made me feel so much and all the feelings are so negative that, for a while, I was like, "Maybe it's not even that bad." [both laugh] Because it's like, "It made me feel so much!" but it is that bad, I think.

C: Yeah, it- I didn't enjoy it. It was a bad time. [G: Yeah.] How would we even evaluate it from a technical standpoint? Like, if the case was like, good? Like, it was, like, whatever. [laughs]

G: Yeah, like, there is a point where that's like, you can just ignore that. [laughs] Like, we have other pressing matters.

C: Yeah. Yeah. I agree.

G: The way we are gonna talk about this episode is gonna be a little bit different because, uh, I don't wanna talk about it. [both laugh]

C: Yeah. I'm not like, a huge- I don't really want to be describing every individual scene that happens either, [G: Yeah.] given that most of them are just sanist jokes.

G: Yeah, we're going to give, like, a general summary of the episode, and then we're going to talk about some things that we want to talk about, I guess. Yeah. So, what did you know about this episode before going in? There's definitely some scenes that are like, known, I think.

C: Yeah, I mean, the "boop" scene is known, but I don't think I knew it was in this episode. [G: The context of it, yeah.] Right. All I know was that it was a case in a mental hospital, and they got in by being patients, and that at some point Dean, is confronted with the fact that he's like, definitely an alcoholic.

G: Yeah. That's it?

C: Yeah, that's all I knew.

G: "Pudding!" That's like, a famous, like, gifset, I think. Or gif, I don't know.

C: What is?

G: "Pudding." Right? Like, when they said that.

C: I've never seen that.

G: Is that really? Damn.

C: What is it- What's the gifset that it's in?

G: It's not a [hard g] gifset. It's just one [soft g] gif. [C: Is it like a reaction [hard g] gif?] I don't know. Is it gif or jif? I'm so sorry. I still don't know.

C: It is either. There's a debate raging about it. The creators said it was jif, but I refuse to accept that.

G: Okay. Slay. Typical Crystal behavior, I guess. [both laugh]

C: Yeah, to me, the creators of gifs and Neil Gaiman are one and the same. [G laughs]

G: Yeah. Like, there's just one where it's like, Dean going, "Pudding!" and I think it's like, I've seen it around a bit, like, outside of Supernatural. Well, let's get into the episode, I guess.

C: [sighs] How are we plot-summarying it?

G: Well, I want to actually talk about the "Then" sequence. [C: Yes.] It's like, Ellen and Jo dying is the "then" sequence. And then-

C: [laughs] It goes from that directly into "Yellow Fever."

G: Yeah, where Dean is like, "We're crazy! We're hunting? That's so crazy!" Yeah. "We're insane!"

C: Yeah. Very sudden tone shift. Yeah.

G: So I guess it's supposed to refer to the fact that they are going to go insane this episode, [laughs] I guess.

C: I think it's to talk about how Martin is meant to set up something about how [G: Ah, yeah.] hunting is harmful to your mental health and will eventually catch up with you somehow, a plotline that they don't do anything good about.

G: Yeah. Cas is prominently in this "then" sequence, and by prominently, I do mean he has one line. [C laughs] And I'm pointing that out because Crystal has called me out on it before. [both laugh]

C: I just don't think that's what prominent means.

G: He's always prominent whenever he is in the fucking show. Yeah. I don't know. There's more stuff. There's more like- Oh, about Lucifer.

C: It's Sam being angry is what it's about.

G: Which is kind of like, why are they painting Sam being angry with Lucifer as like-

C: It's Lucifer!

G: That's Lucifer, dude!

C: Like, [laughs] have you heard of a little thing called Christianity? [G: Whole religion!] Many people are mad at that guy.

G: Whole religion is reliant on being on Lucifer, I think. [C laughs] Why is Sam suddenly so special? I understand that Sam is the specialest little princess in the world, but not for this. For other things!

C: Yeah. Like, I do think that yeah, he is angry. And I think that him being, like, quick to anger and quick to revenge is a big part of who he is in Season 1, at least. [G: Yeah.] But like, it's just odd to bring it back here and then also [G: At Lucifer, specifically.] do nothing about it. Yeah, in the end, he's like, "I was mad at you and dad," like, well, yeah, because like, your dad was abusive and like, Dean, like, although he had no responsibility to you because he was also being abused, like, he didn't like, help. Like, that's a normal thing to be mad about. And he was like, "And then I was mad at Ruby," like, literally makes sense.

G: Well, she betrayed you, so. [laughs]

C: Yeah. [laughing] And he's like, "And now I'm mad at Lucifer. That's so weird!"

G: [laughing] That's literally Lucifer, dude. He's about to possess you. What's happening? [C: Yeah.] It's the same deal where they keep on bringing up Stanford as, like, an evidence of something, and it's like, well, I mean, that's a completely reasonable-

C: Yeah. He's not really betraying his family or something? Like, he went to college to be a lawyer. Whatever! [G laughs]

-

G: Yeah. Well, okay. So the episode, it starts, like, in a fucking clinic, and Dean's like, "Oh, can you fix up my brother?" And then Sam starts talking about his life, like, real life, and the doctor's like, "Wow, interesting." And Dean is like, "Yeah. And the thing is, Sam shouldn't feel guilty about all of his actions, because it was Ruby's fault! Blah blah blah!" And then, you know, the doctor's like, "Get these two in there!"

C: Sam pronounces Castiel as CAS-tiel again during this scene.

G: Yeah! Why is that?

C: I don't know. Does Jared Padalecki not know-

G: He does it before in the past, too.

C: Yeah, he does it on the phone at some point, like- [G: Casteel.] CAS-tiel. It's weird! Whatever. I guess it's better than Caschell. [laughs] Or is it?

G: Excuse me?? What do you mean it's better than Caschell, the best pronunciation of Castiel ever?

C: Caschell's fun. CAS-tiel isn't. CAS-tiel feels like he's like, I don't know. CAS-tiel feels like he's like, the CEO of something, and, like, in a bad way because I don't think there's a good way to be a CEO of something. Caschell is fun. You're right. I take back what I said.

G: Thank you. There's like, a very ominous kind of like- ominous because of how cheery she is lady who does their checkup, and like, later on she's revealed to be the wraith. Honestly, wraiths are iconic in Supernatural. Like, we'll see them. We'll see them.

C: Right. I feel like I have seen, like, the brain that's been sucked of everything like, in multiple gifs, and yeah, not just from this episode.

G: Yeah, I mean, I'm not actually sure we see a lot of the brain. We see a lot of the hand thing for sure. The spiky thing.

C: Mm-hm. Remember when she like, has a fight scene where she puts her hand spike away in order to start fighting? Like, what was that about?

G: Well, because it's sensitive. [C: Oh, okay.] And it's just for piercing. It's not, like, a slasher thing, which is [C: Alright.]- So she puts it out when she's about to pierce Dean's head, right? And she extends it when it doesn't reach him. So true! [C: Yeah.] It's so fun, though, like, really, when he like, snapped it off, like, I thought that was fun. [C: That was fun, yeah.] Yeah. I don't know. They go in.

C: She infects them with [G: With something.] what they call "crazy" later by doing a prostate exam.

G: Yeah. Yeah. Inside, like, they meet Martin, and I do want to linger on Martin a bit. He is- like, they're very vague on his backstory. All I know is something-

C: Yeah, he and John were hunting buddies.

G: Yeah. And they were in Albuquerque. Well, he was in Albuquerque. Where is Albuquerque?

C: I think it's in New Mexico. I think there's an airport there.

G: Uh-huh. No, yeah. I've definitely heard that place before. So that means it's- but I've heard many places in the United States, so that could mean anything, honestly. They were in Albuquerque, something went wrong, and then he checked himself into this institution.

C: Right, so he's been here for, like, [G: A while, yeah.] at least... three years? Is that how math works? Probably four, 'cause, I'm assuming that he and John were hunting, and that ended before Season 1. So five years? That's how math works.

G: It's been a while, yeah. [C: Yeah.] The way he is portrayed is, he is clear-headed, but when hunting gets brought up, he gets jittery about it. [C: Yeah.] There's a scene later where they're trying to convince him to hunt with them, and he was like, "No, I don't want to. Like, it's bad for me. I don't want to," and this is-

C: Yeah, he mentions that seeing dead bodies specifically is like, difficult for him.

G: Yeah. This is painted as something that is so unreasonable and annoying. [C: Yeah.] And Sam did this-

C: They're like, "What? You're such a coward!" But, I mean, they also called Sam a coward for that.

G: Ugh. Oh my god! [C laughs] But like, they painted forcing Sam back as, like, a bad thing, right? [C: Did they?] It had to be something Sam chose for himself.

C: I mean, but it's like, he chose it because all the people trying to get him to come back were right.

G: Yeah, okay, yeah. So this just like, Supernatural's perspective on the thing, I guess.

C: Yeah, the whole, like, "We just need everybody on board, and if you're like, capable of hunting, then you have to, or else you're evil," or I don't even know what they're going for. But yeah. [G: Yeah.] He is portrayed as a coward for having trauma around dead bodies. [laughs]

G: Well, the murders have been- Oh, we see the murder, actually, at the beginning of this obviously.

C: At the beginning, yeah. There's a monster that seems to come out of the grates, is the POV of the woman whose death we see at the beginning, and then it comes out at night, and then people are found dead in the morning, seemingly by suicide. [G: Yeah.] And this happened to a few people so far, [G: Yeah.] but the concerns of the patients regarding this have been wholly dismissed by everyone on the staff.

G: Yeah. And, yeah. [C: It's so weird.] I mean, they are hammering in the like, "These doctors are terrible," or this one doctor, I guess, is kind of shitty.

C: But what seems to be hammered home is just that like, he's wrong because he's wrong about the monster not existing, when it's like, I think that the issue is that him being this dismissive and like, smirking at Dean when, like, he thinks that Dean is, like, sane, and Sam isn't like, while Sam's talking about the apocalypse- Like, he's just a bad doctor, even if the monster wasn't real.

G: And like, the way he talks to Sam- he is not a monster when that was happening, right? He's never the monster. [C: Yeah, he's never the monster.] When he was like, threatening Sam that like, [laughs] "If you cause trouble, we will put you in maximum security person equivalent of a mental hospital." It's like, well. [C: Well.] It's- I don't know. Shitty guy.

-

C: Sam gets taken away to group therapy away from Dean because the doctor calls them "dangerously codependent," which is true, I think. [G: Yeah.] One of the patients is trying to talk about the monster, but he gets shut down by the doctor. I think it was just like, the doctor sucks because the guy just like, says a few times that there's a monster, and then the doctor is like, "I'm gonna call the orderlies on you," like, [G: Yeah.] "Shut the fuck up!" Yeah. So just a lot of him just being a dick, but it only being portrayed as wrong because he's wrong about the monster. And it's just like, okay, like, you thought that these were suicides. If, like, what? At least- what? Three, four patients in the last week in like, your mental hospital where you're supposed to be making them feel better about their lives [G laughs] kill themselves, like, maybe you need to re-examine how you're running things around here.

G: And also just, like, from, you know, if he's not aware that there is actually a monster. If one of your patients is, like, "Somebody killed four other people and painted it as a suicide, and they're gonna come for me next," [laughs] like, I think you should do something about it!

C: Yeah. [laughing] Like, telling that guy "Shut the fuck up" is like, not the way, bro.

G: It's like, you know. I understand that, you know, especially here- Like, I don't know about the United States. I'm sure it's also horrible, but especially here, it's like, there's so few resources, so few whatever. I mean, there's an uptick right now of, like, people who are graduating as psychologists. Fun, I guess. But there are so few resources and so few facilities here to deal with mental health patients, and especially, like, the inpatient type of dealing with patients, right? So I think a part of me, there is, like, a sort of like, "You cannot demand-" Well, not that you cannot demand better, but like, I understand that, like, they're understaffed, they're under-facilitated, blah blah blah blah blah. And that is, like, an argument I hear around a lot, and, I don't know. Like, a lot of my perspective is, uh, I don't give a shit? [C: Yeah.] I mean, obviously, it's like, true, and that does affect the kind of service that you get for these people. I think part of me is also like, "Well, somebody has to advocate for, like, the other side," I guess, [C: Yeah.] and that's the stance I have taken on in my life so far. [C: Yeah.] Yeah, so, I don't know. Just putting it out there, I guess.

C: Yeah. Dean meets a doctor who is like- I don't know how to describe her.

G: Who is like, [laughs] a hot woman.

C: Yeah, she's like, a hot woman. And like-

G: She's cool and everything.

C: He's tried to flirt with the nurse earlier and also this doctor, but neither of them act on it, which is good, but also like, she's a hallucination, and the nurse is a wraith, so, yeah. [both laugh] She's hot. She's cool. She seems to be like, good at getting to the bottom of him without like, being dismissive in like, the way the other doctor is, and they, like, trade questions back and forth where she asks about him, and he asks about the case, and later, it's like, of course, the only person on staff who seems slightly competent isn't an actual employee. [G: Yeah.] We learn a few things about Dean, which ,I guess, first, that he has about 50 drinks a week, and second, that he's never been in a relationship for longer than two months. Which- Cassie was one month? Was that what their backstory was?

G: Perhaps so. I'm not sure. [C: Yeah.] It is kind of crazy that two months is long-term.

C: Mm. What would you define as a long-term relationship?

G: I don't know. Like, maybe six months?

C: Okay. Yeah, for me, I either alternate between three months or one year. [G laughs] Like, I don't really know. But yeah.

G: I think by two months, you're still, like, in the [C: Honeymoon phase?] growing pains age, or like, you know, honeymoon stage, I don't know. Depends, I guess. [C: Yeah.] I feel like if you know each other before you get together, the 2 months is the growing pains stage 'cause you're trying to readjust, recalibrate, etc. If you just meet, that's the honeymoon stage. So there we go.

C: So after this we meet a character named Wendy, and [laughs] it's horrible that she exists. [G: Yeah.] Her role is to play, like, a red herring in the case because basically, like, the trajectory of this is that Sam and Dean both realize that, like- Or at least Dean's having hallucinations. Sam- What's Sam's thing? Is he also having hallucinations?

G: I mean, yeah, later on.

C: Yeah, I forgot. Okay.

G: He punches, like, people.

C: Right, the air. Yes. So Sam and Dean are both having hallucinations, and, like, other symptoms of mental illness later, and they realize that the wraith who they're hunting must be infecting them in order to make them, as they say, "crazy." So like, and they think that the infection happens through touch or saliva or something. So the point of Wendy is for them to think briefly that she's the wraith. However, the extent of her character is that she shows up in the hallway with no warning and makes out with Dean, and she's like, a hot woman. And then later she does the same thing with Sam. And, like, Dean's into it, but Sam tells him that he shouldn't pursue that because- the reasoning seems to be that Wendy can't meaningfully consent, which I don't think is true. So yeah, like, all of her scenes are showing up to make out with each of them one time each, and then being found dead in her room. [G: Yeah.] So that's her. Great.

G: She lives, though.

C: Yeah, as far as we're aware. The guy who was talking in group ends up being the next one to die. Sam and Dean do an autopsy and find out that his brain seems like, completely, like, black and sucked dry and calcified or whatever. [G: Yeah.] Okay, they almost get caught by the nurse.

G: And this is when the pudding stuff happens, [laughs] like, this is when the pudding gif is done. So yeah.

C: They talk with Martin and figure out that it's a wraith and that, you know, they get the right weapon for it eventually. [G: It's silvah.] It's silver, and you can figure out which creature is a wraith by checking in the mirror. They start discussing here why the wraith might have set up camp here, and their reasoning is just that, like, it makes sense. It's just that everyone here is institutionalized, so like, [G: People won't believe them, yeah.] they can't escape well, and also, people won't believe them about seeing a monster. However, later, when the wraith herself is explaining what's going on, her reasoning is completely-

G: She said, "It's yummy!"

C: Yeah, she keeps saying that that "crazy brains" taste the best because they have a lot of dopamine in then. Like, go find a jogger post-jog. Like, what are you talking about? [both laugh] I think, just the the way that this is presented later is very- The episode just uses the word "crazy" a lot [G: Yeah.] as their only descriptor of any mental illness. Like, they don't talk about like, anything specific except for, like, when the doctor mentions that Dean is schizophrenic. And like, the point, is just to like, draw this very clear line between like, "people who are sane" and "people who are crazy," [G: Yeah.] and "crazy" just means, like, anything that seems slightly out of like, the bounds of neurotypical behavior, and like, the whole, like, "crazy brains taste special" thing is just very- like, there are like-

G: There are also differences.

C: - some differences-

G: I would say there are many differences!

C: Oh, no, I meant- I was starting with like, "Yes, there's some difference in, like, chemical makeup like, if you have certain disorders," but like, the way that they flatten it and like, turn it into such a [G: They're all one and the same, yeah.] stark binary that's like- Yeah, it's all one in the same. Like, they mix stuff like Sam and Dean hallucinating with like, Dean, for one brief scene, for a joke, like, not wanting to step on the cracks on the tiles as like a "Haha! Isn't this a well known OCD thing?" Like, they're just throwing everything together without any thought to like, actual people who have mental disorders.

G: Yeah. I mean like, the whole point- Like, you know, later on, Dean is like, "Oh, I mean, at some point, we were probably gonna go crazy, me and Sam, but it's happening at the same time, so that means it's being caused by something else." So like, they're- One, they do refer to themselves in this moment as "going insane" or "crazy" or whatever. Two, there is an acknowledgement that this is a probable part of their future. [C: Right.] And yet, like, no aspect of the episode attempts to treat mental illness as like- with any complexity. [C: Right.] And mentally ill people as people. Like, nothing. I guess they- like, they attempt a little bit with Martin, I guess, and then fail completely. Maybe they don't even attempt. [laughs] I'm not sure. Like, it's just- It's so- This is like, the part of the episode that really upset me. [C: Right.] You're going to do an episode inside a mental hospital and then just, like, make fun of everyone and be like, "Oh, we're not like them," which is the whole point of the episode, I guess. "And if you do this, you're gonna be just like them, and that's so, so, so, so bad." And that's the point. [C: Yep.] Ugh! I know they're going to have mental hospital episodes in the future as well. I am curious into how they are going to do that.

C: The Kaia one or-? That was in rehab.

G: Sam was really in "Born-Again Identity" or- not "Born Again." "Born Again Identity." [laughs] I'm not sure.

C: Oh, right, right, right. Yeah, "The Born-Again Identity," I think.

G: "Born First"? No. It's not "Born Again."

C: I think it's "Born Again." Why wouldn't it be "Born-Again"?

G: I don't know. What does the word born-again mean for you? Is it also a religion?

C: Yeah, I mean, it's a religion thing. [G: Okay.] It's called "The Born-Again Identity."

G: Okay, [laughs] slay.

C: I think it's 'cause they find Cas again, right?

G: No, Sam is also happening. Sam is also in the episode.

C: No, I'm saying that it's probably called that because they find Cas again [G: Yeah, yeah, yeah.], and it's a play on- I think there's a movie or something called The Bourne Identity [G: Yeah.] where Bourne is like, a last name, B-O-U-R-N-E.

G: Yeah. Jason Bourne. They filmed in Manila. [C: Oh!] Yeah.

C: How- Do you know anything else about that movie?

G: Yeah, I watched it, I guess.

C: Oh. [laughs] How was it?

G: I don't know. They're jumping around, doing stuff. [C laughs] [C: Cool.] It's a fucking action movie. What do you want me to say?

C: [laughs] I don't know anything about it. I assumed it would have something to do with the plot of the episode regarding, like, amnesia or mental health, but I guess not.

G: No, I think it's just a pun. I think it's just a pun.

C: Okay. What's the identity in the action movie?

G: Him. He's identifying as Jason Bourne. [both laugh] I don't know. [both laughing] Oh, the movie that was filmed in the Philippines is The Bourne Legacy, so. [C: Okay.] It's a part of the Bourne series, which includes The Bourne Identity.

C: Okay. Well, anyway. Speaking of Sam, what seems to be the attempted beginning emotional core of the episode is that Sam tells Dean that he's worried about him because he hasn't been right since Jo and Ellen's deaths. [G: Yeah.] First off, they were Sam's friends, too. [G: Yeah.] Second, do they do anything with that?

G: Not at all. They don't ever acknowledge it, ever. I think, like, at the end, when Dean was like, "You gotta suck it up."

C: Right, "You have to repress all of your feelings." Okay, that was supposed to come back to that? Okay. So that was the first attempt at emotional core. Not really working. Second attempt at emotional core is that "Sam is angry at Lucifer, and that's wrong." We already talked about that.

G: So stupid, yeah.

C: Stupid, didn't work. Third, they seemed to be setting up something regarding Martin, and then they don't do anything. [G: Yeah.] The next scene is just that Dean sees Dr. Fuller, who's like, the male doctor who was leading group, in the mirror, and he appears to be a wraith. So when he and Sam and Martin meet back up, we have that scene that we talked about earlier, where they're like, "Martin, you should hunt with us." and he's like, "No, I can't," and is clearly shaken. And Sam says, "We know what happened in Albuquerque." And Martin stops and goes, "You don't know the half of it." And then we never learn what happened in Albuquerque! Not a single half of it. What was that about? [laughs] What was the woman of that exchange?

G: I don't know. Just to be ominous and mysterious.

C: Did something happen during filming? Like, it just feels like there's so much that got cut because there's so many dangling threads. [G: Yeah. I don't know.] Like, was there nothing planned for this? 'Cause there's a clear setup for, like, whatever happened in Albuquerque to be revealed at some point, and I don't think it would necessarily make the episode that much better [G: Stronger, yeah.] or stronger or anything, 'cause like, I feel like the point that they'd be making is just that like, "Oh, like, Martin's in here for a good reason. Like, he got trauma from, like, being brave and cool, unlike these people, who are just craazy." So like, I don't think it would improve the episode much, but like, it did seem like they were trying to work towards something [G: Yeah.] with Martin and his backstory.

C: Because they mentioned it prior to this, also! [C: Yes.] Like, they also say, like, "Oh. After Albuquerque-"

C: Yeah, "He hasn't been the same since Albuquerque." Like, what happened, bro? [laughs]

G: And if they're trying to, you know, make that parallel of like, "Just like Ellen and Jo" and "Dean hasn't been the same since then," it's like, well, try to do something about it.

C: Yeah, try a little harder. What's happening here?

-

G: So they go for the attack. Martin is actually there, or he shows up later, and basically, like, Sam attacks the doctor, and he slices him on the arm with a silver something, and he doesn't disintegrate completely. And then, like, there are two orderlies who come in, and Sam, like, demolishes these two. [C laughs] [C: Yeah.] You know, he goes for the kill, except Martin stops him because that's not the wraith. And then Sam gets sedated, I suppose, and then they bring him back to a room where, I don't know. He's there, I guess. Dean comes in, and they talk. I forgot, actually, what this conversation is. What is it about?

C: Just how Dean realizes that he was wrong about the wraith being Dr. Fuller, so he's worried that he's like, going crazy. And then Sam says that, "You're my brother, and I still love you," but he's also like, very drugged up the whole time. And the general scene is just played for humor, 'cause Sam's like, high. [G: Yeah.] And like, the premise of- Sam got checked in- Like, Dean in the intake appointment is talking about how like, "It wasn't Sam's fault that he started the apocalypse. He was just high." And like, he's currently in a situation where he's been forcibly drugged, [G: Yeah.] and tied to a bed in a way that's quite similar to the panic room in Season 4, I would say, and then there's another scene where he's in solitary where it feels even more similar to that, and they don't do anything with that? [G: Yeah.] It just seems like a very obvious parallel that you would discuss in some way.

G: Yeah, just because "It's funny! It's for comedy!" Oh my god. Like, later on, the scene that you pointed out, of like, Dean stepping on the tiles-

C: Trying to avoid stepping on the tiles, yeah.

G: Like, that was also played comedically, and like, I don't know. A bit of me was like, maybe Jensen Ackles is just missing the tone completely. But also, there was a director for this episode, and they could have directed it properly.

C: Yeah, I think it was meant to be played comedically.

G: So it was intentional that it was like this. And it was so frustrating. So frustrating. Because, like, you know, there's the ableist aspect of it, but also, like, story-wise, you could be doing something interesting here. Like, Sam and Dean are interesting characters, and [C: Some claim this.] especially, like, as you said, Sam's here. It is an interesting situation that he has been put, and instead of doing anything with it, it's just silly goofy time. And it's like, "Well, don't do it like that."

C: Right. "Isn't it funny how mental hospital patients get forcibly sedated because then they talk funny and boop their brothers' noses!" Like, no! [laughs] Incorrect. So that's a scene that is annoying.

-

G: So Dean starts, you know. He's walking the hallway. The lady doctor, like, stops him and to him, and then she starts talking a bit more with knowledge of what's happening. And Dean is like, "Oh, what are you really? What are you? What are you?" And then this, I suppose, janitor stops them, goes like, "Hey, stop all that." and points out that Dean is actually talking to nobody. And Dean, like, you know, does freak out about this because like, "Oh my god, I am actually going crazy."

C: Right. And also the the bent of the conversation with the doctor is just that, like, Dean feels responsible for everybody in the world and that like, he needs to save everybody, and that's like, a bunch of, like, pressure and guilt, blah blah blah, that he's putting himself under. I just really don't buy [laughs] any storyline like this in Supernatural where it's like, "You're so guilty about all the people you can't save," etc, etc 'cause it's like, so many people die on their cases while they're fucking around elsewhere, and [laughs] they don't feel bad about it. [G: Yeah.] Like, it's just specific people that they feel bad about dying. But whatever. I guess that's what they're going for.

We have the scene where Dr. Fuller comes in, and, as we've mentioned, threatens to put Sam in "a facility that is equipped to handle violent patients" if he has another outburst.

G: And then it's like, "And there, they won't be as niceys."

C: Yeah. "As me."

G: And also, the doctor was like, "I don't think you can get better because you're so angy!" [both laugh]

C: Like, you're a terrible doctor! Yeah, he goes like, "I think that, like, your delusions around monsters, like, that's fine. People learn to live with that. But like, your anger issues are incurable!" And it's like, well, at least you said that first sentence. But can we circle back to that second sentence? What? He specifically says that Sam- the look in Sam's eyes was like, "not human."

G: My god! [C: Fire- who? Fire this guy!] And this is just a dude! He's not even a monster!

C: Yeah, yeah. And like, the point is, like, the themes and motifs. But like, if you're setting something inside a mental hospital like, maybe you should think about what is like, [laughs] appropriate for the staff to be saying or doing. And like, if it's not appropriate, then, like, probably they should just be the monster. Or- it's not- Okay. Like, portrayal of, like, shitty staff at a mental hospital is like [both] is fine because, like, that is true. But like, it's the way that it's treated like this is like, [G: Yeah.] an okay way for him to talk to a patient, and like, in fact, good for him to tell Sam this so that he can come to realizations and change as a person. Like, that's the issue.

G: Yeah, like, I mean, this is why, like, you know, for a while, I was like, "Oh, I feel like shit. It must be an okay episode." Because, like, yeah, it's supposed to make you feel like shit. But I don't know, the specifics of how they do it-

C: Like, it' not really supposed to make you feel like shit, is the thing. Like, I think it's supposed to be mostly a lighthearted episode. [laughs]

G: Crazy! I don't know. Let's check reviews later. Let's check the reviews later. [C: Yeah.] Perhaps people have the same sentiment as we do.

C: Right. It's like, just the- We have "Asylum" in Season 1, and like, that one, like, the horror is around patient abuse, and like, the twist is like, the patients, when they killed that doctor, they were acting reasonably as a result of him, like, doing certain experiments to make them angrier and stuff. Like, the horror is tied into the mistreatment. Whereas here, like, the horror is completely separate. They suggest that, like, the structure of a mental hospital makes it so that it's easier to abuse and prey on patients, and then, like, the wraith shows up and completely nixes that. And then, like, the places where we see mistreatment, like, of Sam, like, that's not part of the horror. It's just like, "What an annoying obstacle!" But like, "This obstacle is only wrong because monsters are real, and we need to hunt it," and like, there's no feeling that like, if you did this to someone who wasn't Sam, that it would be wrong. Like, you know what I mean? [G: Yeah.] So yeah, that's the main bent of the episode that gets me riled up.

G: Yeah. Sam was allowed to go out. And also, the fact that they were like, "It's so bad that Sam beat up those orderlies," and the episode like, agrees with it, doesn't it? Like, the episode agrees with the whole like, "Sam is so sick in the head for being so mad. He beat up those orderlies." It's like, they've done that-

C: Yeah, while he was trying to kill someone he thought was a monster, yeah.

G: - many, many, many times. [C: Plenty.] And also, like, he's a giant man! [both laugh] He just moves around. He's so big.

C: Yeah. He takes a step, like, all your bones break. [laughs]

G: [laughs] I mean, I think that's a mean thing to say about Sam Winchester. No, but like, you understand what I mean, right? To paint it as "Sam is so monstrous." Why? Because he's big and, like, has years and years and years of combat experience? [laughs] I think this is completely normal for Sam Winchester. I don't know. It's just so stupid.

C: Yeah. I mean the funniest "Sam is too angry" moment is when he's trying to lockpick a door, and Dean's like, "Come on, hurry up," and then, like, he turns around, and the camera really focuses on his face when he tells- What does he tell Dean? Like, "Shut up"?

G: "Shut up" or something, yeah.

C: Yeah, and it's like, "Oh my god, Sam's so angry and mean in the moment," and it's like, all of us wished we could tell Dean to shut the fuck up.

G: Exactly. And then, I don't know. Sam, like, starts walking down, but when he gets there, Dean, like, tells him, like, I don't know. "You're actually a monster, and it's not about Ruby. It's you." And then people start beating him up, and then he fights back, and he starts, you know, punching around. And then as we go, we see that it's actually normal and a hallucination, and Sam gets taken away, and Dean is, like, in the corner. And they do, like, the- you know, like, the thing that they do with like, when they're trying to portray someone as losing their mind where they're like, twiddling their thumbs or something? [C: Right.] That's how Dean is being played right now. [C: Right.]

-

G: So Dean goes in to talk to Martin about it. And it's like, this scene where he keeps on being distracted from talking. But basically he's like, "Oh, it must be Wendy's fault." and also, "I don't know. Something's happening."

C: One interesting thing is that he thinks that- at one moment, he wonders if it's the ghost of John that's making [G: Yeah.] his brain act up. Which, like, that's fascinating. I don't think they meant anything by it in the episode besides, like, "What a funny line," but it's like- I don't- Why would Dean think that? What does he think John would want? What would John gain by doing this? Why does he think John's angry at him?

G: They out. The tiles thing happens here. Immediately, a woman screams, and then Dean just completely abandons this compulsion because the bit is done. The joke is already delivered, so it doesn't matter anymore.

C: Yup. Wendy's there with like, slit wrists, and the nurse is standing over her with, like, her wraith face, and like, [G: Her fingy.] her wraith finger thing. There's like, a spike that comes out of her wrist. And there's like, a fight scene, and the wraith heads out of the room and calls on two orderlies to go to Wendy's room, to like-

G: Subdue Martin.

C: To fight, to subdue Dean and Martin. And Martin basically offers to help hold them back and also look after Wendy as Dean goes after the wraith.

G: Yeah, 'cause Wendy is still breathing, like, she's still alive. [C: Yes.] And when the orderlies come in, Martin is standing over her, so that's- you know.

C: Yeah, like, it's going to look bad.

G: Really bad, yeah.

C: Yeah, though, I mean- it seems. Yeah, it's possible that they might end up blaming him for the deaths of all the other patients. He also attacks the two orderlies, which is like, something that they will absolutely punish him for in some way, and that is the last we see of him [G: Yeah.] for the entire episode. When they're escaping, they do not try to get him out, [G: Yeah.] despite knowing for sure that he's going to be punished severely.

G: Yeah, when they were running out, I was, like, looking at my screen, going like, "Go back!" [C: Because Martin, yeah.] because Martin is still there. And when Sam stops, I was like, "He's stopping because he's gonna go back in or he's gonna say, 'Hey, we should get Martin' or something." But no, he doesn't. They don't give a shit. And like, the only mention of him after this episode is for Dean to be like, "You don't want to end up like him, do you?" It's so horrible!

C: He's a much nicer and more pleasant person to be around than either of you. [laughs] I would rather end up "like Martin" than either of you. What are you even talking about?

G: My god. It's such a big- To me, like, okay, fine. The Winchesters think crazy people are not people. Whatever. They have been long established as very loyal to the hunter pack [C: Yeah.], very loyal to all the people who have helped them or John in the past. Martin threw himself at these orderlies so that Dean can go and save Sam, and is like, taking the fall for it, basically. And like, it is not, like, painted as anything that they are to be grateful for, like, at all. [C: Yeah.] Like, okay, fine. Leave him there. I don't know. Whatever. It's just like, so ungrateful! It's because they don't view him as part of the pack anymore, as part of the hunter pack anymore. Like, they just think he's like, a pathetic loser, I guess.

C: I guess. Even though he did overcome, like, his fears or whatever to help you and everything [G: Yeah.], so like, the main reason you thought he was a loser or whatever is gone. But I guess the actual main reason is that he's mentally ill, so that will never change in your minds. Great.

G: Yeah. And it's like, of course it's going to bring up negative feelings, like, the idea that like, "Oh, we have, like, somebody who's part of the community or part of the family or whatever, but like, it's so embarrassing! They're mentally ill!" And it's like, my god, man! Because that is how it is portrayed, right? Like, "You don't want to be like Martin because Martin's like, embarrassing" and whatever. [C: Yeah.] And in a way, they're using that mindset- Not "in a way." Like, they are using that mindset to justify leaving him behind. He's either gonna go to that maximum facility whatever, yeah, that the doctor was talking about, or to prison. [C: Yeah.] And it's like, you're just going to leave him in there? My god. I mean, the Winchesters-

C: There seems to be just the idea that, like, "We can't break him out because, like, the 'real world' needs to be like, kept away from him." Like, "he can't handle it," or like- I don't know. "He could be a danger to the outside-" I don't know. But there is just a "He can't exist outside of this facility, so like, if that means that he's gonna end up in prison or, like, in like, a maximum security facility that probably abuses its patients like crazy, then like, yeah. Whatever. We can't put him in the outside world!" Like, you're- No. Incorrect. The end.

G: Yeah. So horrible.

C: Yeah. Horrible. He checked himself in, too!

G: Yeah. He was not- I don't think we are to believe that he was causing any trouble for anyone before he checked himself in.

C: Yeah. And even if he didn't, like, they shouldn't have left him behind. But it'd be like, "Maybe we need to discuss, like, if there's other treatment that we want to get him under a new identity" or whatever. But yeah.

G: It's just, none of these people are treated like people. Martin is the only one we actually talked to. Wendy, not particularly. [C: Yeah.] And those are the only two people aside- I guess also the person who was like, "I saw it. I saw it." That's the person we see. It's just, my god.

-

C: The wraith enters Sam's room. He's been put in like, solitary and a padded room, and like, tied to a bed. And she starts trying to feed on him. And this is when she says that "crazy brains taste better because of all the hormones and chemicals in them." She says, "And the crazier they are, the better they taste."

G: What the fuck is the metric here?

C: What does that mean? [laughs] [G: Slay.] Yeah. What does that mean? Dean comes in to try to defend Sam, and there's a fight sequence where he defeats her by- She thinks she has him, and she's going to feed on him, so her spike comes out, but then he breaks it off, she starts bleeding a lot from it, and then he kills her. But like, her body, like, doesn't change. She still looks like a human nurse.

G: Yeah. And also, she doesn't disintegrate. She's just on the floor.

C: Right. So I was almost waiting for a twist where it was like, "It wasn't even her." But no, it was her. But like, nothing happens to her body, I guess. And then they run out. I guess it's possible that most of the deaths- Well, not all of them can be blamed on Sam and Dean, because most of them happened before they got here. But it's possible that since they escaped, and it's clear that like, they killed this nurse, that Martin will only be blamed for attacking the two orderlies? [G: Yeah.] I don't know. I also don't know what the camera situation is in this mental hospital, so, yeah.

G: I mean, you know, this wraith got around, so [C: That's true.] probably not that good.

C: Yeah, probably not that good.

G: I mean, she was attacking inside rooms, and they shouldn't have inside rooms, right?

C: I don't know what the norm [G: Law, yeah.] is around that, yeah. But yeah, so they escape, and they have a final conversation where Sam's like, "The wraith was right!" And Dean's like, "No, it's fine, and also I need twelve drinks," which I think is supposed to be a continuation of the like, "He does have a substance abuse problem regarding alcohol, but we're not going to do anything about it." But yeah, you know, Sam's just like, "I have anger problems, 'cause I was mad at John, Lilith, and Lucifer." [laughs] I think all reasonable people to be angry at.

G: I understand Sam's, you know, "I'm mad at everything." Like yeah, that is a problem. Like, being mad is not a pleasant feeling, [laughs] so if you're mad all the time, like, that's not good.

C: Yeah. If his point is like, "Being angry all the time, like, decreases my quality of life, or like, makes my judgment worse in like, important situations," like fine. Okay. But I feel like all he's going off of was the doctor being like, "You'll never go get over this, and also, you didn't look human when you were angy!" Like, that doesn't mean anything.

G: Yeah, I don't know. I don't want to diminish, like, the anguish of having anger issues. [C: Right.] It's just that the way Supernatural does it is so fucking stupid. [C laughs] Everything they do is so stupid! What if Andrew Dabb and Andrew Loflin are terrible writers? [C laughs] We have considered this multiple times, and it's true, but, [C: Yeah, they are.] let's consider it again.

C: Consider it true.

G: Ugh, and then "Hammer of the Fucking Gods." Oh my god!

C: Yeah. Yeah. [G: Well.] Yeah, Dean tells him like, "It doesn't matter." Like, he goes, "What are you gonna do? You gonna take a leave of absence? You gonna say yes to Lucifer?" The first one, leave of absence, is that just like, Sam quitting hunting as he did earlier? [G: Yeah.] Okay, so he's like, "Well, sorry about your anger issues. But since you're not gonna say yes to Lucifer or quit hunting, you just have to take all that crap and bury it so that we don't end up like Martin." This is truly the season of Dean, giving absolutely shit mental health advice. Remember when he told Bobby, "If you ever bring up being suicidal again, like, I hate you" [laughs] or whatever? [G: My god.] And it's like, I get why this is like- You're in survival mode, it's the apocalypse, whatever whatever. Like, the people watching this episode are usually not in survival mode during the apocalypse. [laughs] Like, you have to keep that in mind when you're having Dean dish out the world's worst advice. [laughs] But yeah, and then they they drive away, leaving Martin behind to face the horrors. The end!

G: Yeah, well. [C: Bad.] What did we think about this episode? Multiple terrible things in many layers, yeah.

C: Yeah. I have nothing but complaints about it, but I have already said all of them.

-

G: Best Line/Worst Line? [laughs] [C: Ah!] Why have we trapped ourselves to saying a Best Line for any, honestly, is the question.

C: I think I found the initial scene where they're just talking to Dr. Fuller and trying to get into the hospital by talking about their live straightforwardly, I feel like I did find that a bit amusing.

G: You know, when Dean does the whistle and then twirls his fingers, like, "crazy!" I was like, [laughs] "That is something Dean Winchester would do." So yeah.

C: Yeah, it is something Dean Winchester would do.

G: Worst line, I think, uh, everything? I don't know.

C: Yeah, I think all of them.

G: I really do hate when Dean goes like, "You're gonna bury it, you're gonna forget about it, because that's how we keep going, that's how we don't end up like Martin." [C: Yeah.] Hate it!

C: Shut the fuck up, Dean.

G: Writer sins? Spread those sheets.

C: They've managed to mostly dodge our three main columns, but there is misogyny in the form of Wendy.

G: Yeah, I think that's it. 2? 'Cause, I mean, she does show up 2 times.

C: It's true. [laughs] 1 point per time.

G: Racism and homophobia is a 0. W have to put a fucking- Didn't we have an episode where we put like, honorary column?

C: Yeah, I think "When the Levee Breaks." Yeah, we just put +5 ableism in a column that did not have a header.

G: You know what? This also-

C: +10. [laughs] Let's just go beyond-

G: But we have a 1-5 rating! We have a 1-5 rating. We have to respect the fucking rating.

C: Okay, yeah. Let's respect the fucking rating.

Alright. IMDb. I don't think this is particularly enjoyed by the populace.

G: I don't know. I hope not. I would say, perhaps, this is an 8.3.

C: Okay, I'm looking at how fallen idols got a 7.9. And that was a lot of Paris Hilton hate, so I'm gonna go 8.0.

G: Okay, let's check. [C: Okay.] Hm. It's an 8.5.

C: Oh. Well, I don't like that.

G: Yeah, they think it's funny. [C: Okay.] This one is disappointed with the episode. [C: Because of the ableism?] There was a break before this one. "Storyline was ill-conceived, well played out, a few weak attempts of humor."

C: "I love how the script writers choose an attractive woman as Dean's antagonist, the reversal of fortunes where Dean uses his looks and personality on women." Sure. [G laughs]

G: Diversity win. They literally said diversity win.

C: Yeah. And like, she wasn't even a real woman. Like, he made her up, so like, she was a man in some ways.

G: No, the wraith!

C: I guess the- Oh, the wraith being the main antagonist. I thought they were talking about the doctor, 'cause the wraith was like, both of their antagonists. The doctor was Dean-specific, but whatever. I guess they were being Dean-centric.

G: I mean, that’s it, really for this episode of Busty Asian Beauties. Next week, we will be discussing Season 5, Episode 12: "Swap Meat"! Leave us a rating or a review wherever you get your podcasts.

C: At least Sam is gonna call a teenager a virgin. I don't think it'll be that funny. [G laughs] [G: Yeah.] Well, follow us on social media! We are on Tumblr at bustyasianbeautiespod.tumblr.com. Our official tag is #BABPod, B-A-B-POD. Thanks to everyone who's donated to our Ko-Fi at ko-fi.com/bustyasianbeautiespod, which is where our outtakes live, and check out our merch at babpod.redbubble.com.

G: You can email us any feedback, comments, or inquiries at bustyasianbeautiespod@gmail.com. See you guys next time! [both] Bye!

[guitar music]

[agentnico]

Monkey Man (2024) review

Reading up about the behind the scenes of this film, I must say this underwent quite the troublesome production. From filming during COVID to Patel breaking his foot during the shoot to the cameras breaking forcing them to film certain scenes on iPhones to Patel’s mother dying…. Honestly talk about pouring your heart and soul into something, eh! Bet Patel was recalling the words of his character Sonny from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel - “Everything will be all right in the end... if it's not all right then it's not yet the end.”

Plot: A young man ekes out a meagre living in an underground fight club where, night after night, wearing a gorilla mask, he's beaten bloody by more popular fighters for cash. After years of suppressed rage, he discovers a way to infiltrate the enclave of the city's sinister elite. As his childhood trauma boils over, his mysteriously scarred hands unleash an explosive campaign of retribution to settle the score with the men who took everything from him.

It’s hard not to root for Dev Patel. He just seems like such a solid dude, so of course we want him and his little new movie to do well. Naturally Jordan Peele buying the project from Netflix and putting it in theatres is a great way to market it and I’m so happy Patel is getting the recognition for it, as for a while there it did feel like he fell off the face of the Earth. Last time we saw him was in Green Knight that came out in 2021. Wait. 2021? That cannot be right. Green Knight was released 3 years ago??! I’m sorry, I need a minute, as I just realised I’m growing old really really fast. You know who isn’t getting old? Dev Patel apparently as turns out he’s a straight up action star in his thirties! He beats the hell out of a lot of folks in this movie. Like the dude straight up knife kills a goon with his teeth! That’s some John Wick-pencil killing level shiz! Patel doesn’t pull his punches here, and Twitter referring to him as ‘the Indian John Wick’ is very accurate.

That being said Patel not only stars, but is also on writing, producing and directing duties here. This is very much a star-turning moment for him, as he calls for Hollywood and the audience to accept his new image. Again - as the action hero totally believable. From a writing standpoint too he seems to have a lot to say, as Monkey Man is imbued in Indian culture and tradition, as well as a lot of social political commentary, as well as giving a nice nod to the trans community. That being said it does also seem like he has too much to say. As in the movie feels really messy with so many themes and ideas, that especially the first half feels really all over the place and it’s so difficult as a result to connect with anything that’s going on and even so much as care. In the last third the movie does find its groove, however it does take its sweet time to get there.

As a director too Patel definitely takes inspiration from other filmmakers he worked with in the past such as David Lowery, Neil Blomkamp and Danny Boyle, in the way he stylises this movie, and a lot of it does look good. But, and of course there was going to be a but! But there is a lot of shaky cam. Yes ladies and gentlemen, as much as this is the great comeback of Dev Patel, this too happens to be the major return of shaky cam. And unlike Patel, this is an unwelcome one. Like why? Why I ask?? Who the hell was craving the return of shaky cam!? So much of the action in this movie is missed due to the camera frenetically jumping around like a monkey high on cocaine, and in fact not only in the action sequences. Dev Patel also seems obsessed with filming close ups, so much so that 90% of the movie I found myself staring up someone’s hairy nostril. Whilst still in shaky cam mode!! This movie was honestly so dizzying and that very much hindered the overall experience.

All in all this is an ambitious directorial debut for Dev Patel that primarily works as a showcase for his action star potential, whilst when it comes to his directing even though there are a lot of flaws, I believe give the man a few more projects and he’ll be able to create something truly special. Look, everyone needs to start somewhere. Also special shout out to my man Sharlto Copley who’s only in about 5-10 minutes in this movie, yet he brings his usual excitable charismatic South African energy, that he still made me chuckle whenever he did literally anything. The guy’s just amusing to watch. Anyway, Dev Patel keep it up - you’ve definitely got something. However I must say for all the teasing of him being the so-called monkey man, when it came to the final fight he comes wearing the mask, but then takes it off before entering battle mode. Like what the hell? You promise us monkey man so I expect and want to see a man fight in a monkey mask at all times!! Why hast thou forsaken that from me??

Overall score: 5/10

[this-is-a-name-dont-worry]

J'ai fait une grille de ship pour Adam et Neil, donc c'est parti pour parler d'eux >:)

close ups+explanations (in english) under cut

Part 1/2 (part 2 here)

Paris, 1795, we got caught. They used my "service" to a noble as a way to explain why and how am I a traitor to the people, and Neil was put as my associate. We got shot, among other "criminals". I feel awful, he died because of me... and he did so thinking I'll be gone too. I'm sitting, next to where we were thrown, but I can't grieve forever. I wonder where I'll go start my new life now...?

I hear a noise from behind me, look in its direction, thinking that some good and loyal citizens already spotted me. My eyes widen.

Neil seems as surprised as I am seeing each other alive.

I laugh. So that's why he was so strange? That's why he seemed to grieve my death more than his? He starts laughing too, how likely was it that two immortals found each other? I run up to him, and wraps him in a hug, laughing and laughing.

Our story is only beginning.

1840; in a revolt, Neil got hurt. Adam decided to carry him to somewhere else the time for him to heal. His boyfriend has objections about how he's being transported, and the fact he needs to be transported at all.

So canonically Neil was tricked into receiving immortality and promising to a shady guy to help him with stuff. And shady guy will ask Neil to do many more or less tiny things, that are actually the first domino in creating events that leads to lot of death (taking from a cave with corpses of ill people some infected tissues to spread it around, creating the pest epidemic, for exemple); it ends with WWII when Neil just can't accept to side with the nazis and help out the Allies, and it's implied shady guy is the devil (not what he is in my fan continuation but that's the obvious intent). And even though it's not said, it's implied Neil helped with creating many bloodshed for humanity. So here we are in 14-18 (need to decide on actual date), and Neil helped with the domino effect to create the war. He and Adam are in their appartment in the US, and things became a bit too much at once when hearing the news. Adam has no idea what got Neil so upset, so he assumes it's the immortality burden. but no it's just the instrument in creating atrocities burden.

[enpassants]

neil perry deciding to announce his love for todd anderson by reading him a love poem he found but todd just thinks he's really admiring poetry

[reiedits1]

The Last Of Us Part II

I played and finished The Last Of Us Part II last week and it has been on my mind ever since. I obviously understand that a lot of people have problems with this game, and that’s okay. I’m not here to change anyone’s views on the game or anything, I just want to kind of write down my opinions and takeaways as, again, it’s been on my mind since finishing it lol. Nobody may see this and this will mean nothing, that’s fine. 

Anyway, this post will contain SPOILERS

My Overall Thoughts

I’m not entirely sure how to structure this so I guess I’ll just start with a broad statement lol; I loved The Last Of Us Part II. In my opinion, it’s a beautiful and well-crafted story about loss, grief and consequences, with how each of these things affect different people. 

Discussion 

From what I’ve seen, I see a lot of people hating on this game for its handling of Joel and the decision to have the player play as Joel’s murderer, Abby. I’ve also seen a lot of people say that the message is as simple and plain as “viOleNcE iS bAd”, but I personally think it’s so much more than that.

The Last Of Us Part II doesn’t just tell you that violence is bad, but it shows you the ramifications of it by dealing with the emotional toll as well as the consequences on not just the main person involved, but their loved ones too.

As we all know, at the start of the game, Joel is brutally killed by Abby and we go with Ellie on a mission to avenge him by killing everybody involved. We see it all from Ellie’s point of view, hardheartedly seeing Abby as the villain as she just killed the character that we know and love as we have an emotional connection to him after the first game. His death is supposed to make you feel angered. It’s not like you’re supposed to be joyed by it. His death scene left me feeling empty and sick, wanting revenge alongside Ellie. 

However, as the game goes on, we start to see the story from Abby’s point of view. We learn that the doctor that you, the player, had to murder at the end of The Last of Us is actually the father of Abby. This is brilliant. Now we see one of the main themes of the story, consequences, and I was immediately on board. Joel is not a good person, at all. He murdered hundreds of Fireflies and took away the possible cure for humanity for his own personal reasons. This is incredibly selfish, even going to the lengths of lying to Ellie about the events as he knows that it isn’t what she would want. Technically, Joel is the villain.

Joel had been through so much, so you may think it’s justified. But the point is, Joel isn’t the only person in the world of The Last of Us. Everybody he murders aren’t just mindless NPCs, they are people. People with their own problems who have gone through their own share of pain and loss, people with their own loved ones. Such as the doctor, who had Abby, whom he loved very much and Abby the same. So, understandably, she would feel incredibly angry and feel the need for revenge, just the same as Ellie and the player after Joel’s death.

There is now a cycle of revenge. Ellie goes on to kill Abby’s friends, and so Abby tries to kill Ellie and her friends. It’s not until Lev talks Abby out of it that the cycle seems to have been “broken”. Abby and Lev put it behind them, however, Ellie cannot and nor can Tommy, which means that the cycle is not broken. Ellie continues her hunt for revenge, thinking it’s still what she needs. Just as she’s about to murder Abby, she sees it’s completely useless.

Here I’m going to talk about another core theme of the story: loss. As Ellie is about to kill Abby, she realises that Joel is gone. Completely gone, and killing Abby is not going to change that. She now has Lev, and if Ellie was to kill Abby, Lev would only lose Abby, leaving him in the same situation Ellie was in at the start of the game, which in turn means Ellie is becoming what she set out to kill. It’s no use. Revenge only causes more pain and loss. This cycle is so vicious and nobody wins, and Abby realised this once she found Lev, and found that revenge is a futile thing that does not achieve anything, especially not bringing back her dead friends. She managed to break the cycle herself, and in turn, she found a life worth living, a live with Lev. However, Ellie could not manage this, choosing to still seek revenge.

Because of this, she faces the consequences. She loses all of her loved ones. She loses Dina, she loses Jesse and she loses her baby son, JJ. Tommy is the same too. Tommy couldn’t break the cycle, and he loses his wife, Maria. And guess what, Joel is still gone. All of that loss, yet Joel is still dead. It’s all been for nothing. Ellie is now completely alone, which is what she said she was scared of in the first game, all because of revenge. The way forward is not anger, rage or revenge, but acceptance and love. That’s my takeaway.

You may think this treatment of Joel and Ellie is “disrespectful”, but I disagree. In the first game, you do a lot of bad things as these characters. Yeah, you go through a lot of pain, but so has everybody else, yet they still face the unfavorable consequences. It only makes sense that Joel and Ellie would too. In my opinion, this only helps to build the world of The Last of Us and show that just because Joel and Ellie are the main characters, they aren’t invincible, and the world doesn’t revolve around them. They just happen to be two people who live in the world amongst so many others, which for me, makes it so much more realistic. This is emphasised in the incredible detail in the gameplay of each enemy having names, with other enemies interacting with eachother as you stalk them. It makes them feel so much more real and only increased my enjoyability.

From a story like this, which is so dark and gritty, I don’t expect a happy ending. You’re not supposed to like Ellie by the end of this story, as she serves as the example of why the cycle of revenge is horrible. You’re not supposed to feel satisfied by it, you’re supposed to feel empty, hurt and sad. That is literally the point. 

You have to realise that The Last Of Us is a piece of artistic storytelling told and made by artists. It would have been so easy for Neil Druckmann to write a boring and two-dimensional story to appease players and make bank. But he didn’t. He chose to craft an intricate, heavy and creative direction for his material, and I hugely respect that. At the end of the day, he doesn’t owe you anything. This is his story, and these are his characters, he can do what he wants with them. If you don’t like his creative vision, then great! You don’t have to. If you don’t like something, just don’t play/watch/read it. If you loved the first game but hated the second, then just pretend it doesn’t exist and come up with your own fanfiction for these characters, it probably wouldn’t have been as good as this.

A lot of people blame “bad writing” when they don’t like something. There’s a difference between feeling bad about something than it being bad writing, you know. Just because it wasn’t what you wanted, doesn’t mean the writing is bad. By you feeling angry about Joel dying, Neil Druckmann’s writing has accomplished its objective. And I’m not trying to say that everybody who doesn’t like this game didn’t like it because their fanfiction didn’t come true. You cannot like this game solely because you don’t like the direction it took, and that’s fine. Because again, this story is a piece of artistic storytelling, and art is subjective.

This entire post is just my opinion. I personally loved this story and these characters, and it was exactly what I wanted to get out of this game. Everything about the game I just adored. I loved the plot, the writing, the characters, the gameplay, the music, the visuals, the performances - everything. And if you didn’t, then great. That’s your opinion. It just hurts me to see so many people dismissing the incredible things achieved in this game solely because of one plot point. I don’t know. As I said, I’m not trying to change your opinion or anything, I just thought I’d share mine.

I only scratched the surface of my thoughts and opinions on this game. I could talk about it for hours, which only goes to show the extent of its achievements and how incredible it really is. I doubt anybody is reading this and that’s fine, apologies if none of what I said made any sense at all lol, I’m awful at articulating my opinions aha.