#and tbh there’s still not enough but i’ll take the crumbs any day

[literaila]

Addressing your tags first and foremost because thank goodness. I was beginning to wonder if I was showing up a little too much in your notifs. I'd be embarrassed if I had any shame but I'm a proud lover of your works, what can I say? Catch me reading an update in my bed and hour before work at like 6am. Liked. Reblogged to my sideblog. Framed. Next.

7 years, my goodness. I'll perhaps have to reconsider, gojo is not worth it 😪 I wish I had an appetite for angst like I used to but alas, I can no longer tolerate the feeling of someone reaching inside me to coil my stomach around their calloused hands and rip it out of me. It's just now how I like to spend any random Tuesday, you know? I prefer the cushioning of fluff. But I guess that's personal preferences for you. You do angst well. Just try not to go for my stomach next time~

Old men and philosophy. Put us in a room and we'll be pulling revelations from the sky.

If its already on its way, I shall prepare the shrine. Visits on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Paid entry.

Your puppy sounds like the grudge she holds against gojo is personal. Can't fault her for that tbh, he's definitely done something wrong and she knows it.

This is why people around him are violent. Bless yuuji, still blinded with his admiration (who can blame him)

no i’m almost tempted to plead you for more. tell me about your headaches, tell me if you find a typo in something i’ve typed, tell me if you happen upon a choso hoodie like i do every couple of days, tell me if your flowers die and you have to throw them out. i will take the blandest of crumbs, the smallest of facts. whatever you want, really.

catch me straining at six in the morning to read your asks (not right now, but usually). i genuinely do wake up every hour during the night and check my inbox for messages. and respond half asleep, obviously. it’s an issue, but i have no plans for resolution.

don’t reconsider. i have considered it enough for the both of us, and i will gladly take any pain gojo wants to push on me (with a heavily winded rant, of course. some light scolding).

ah, yes. i personally prefer fake angst in which the characters could not have an issue if they would fess up. real angst? death? pain? no thanks, i’ll take the burden of fluff. believe me, i used to write a lot more angst (someone said to me ‘verity, sometimes people just don’t want to read angst’ and um. yeah true, so i evolved into more fluff ((and overall better writing)) i’ll send your stomach an apology letter, fret not.

put me and any old man in a room and i will find a way to start a fight. it’s simply in my nature.

i just said that money sucks and now i have to pay for entrance fee to my own heart??? fine, i guess, i suppose. i’ve gifted it to you and no takebacksies and all that

i think you mean the grudge she holds against me. literally last time i wrote with her around she immediately came to sit in my lap and typed some outrageous things with her entire body weight. franklin doesn’t understand common courtesy or art (side eyeing me as we speak)

(gojo is always doing something wrong though. we all know it)

real real real. i was thinking about reader and satoru in a room, much too close to each other, and i thought ‘huh, that’s kind of a weird thing to do. even for two grossly pining characters. how realistic is that, chat?’ but then i remembered who i was writing about. (gojo cannot be stopped)

[charmixpower]

Tbh in terms of rivusa and winx as a whole I refuse to acknowledge anything past season 5 like season 5 was crap but tbh the small rivusa moments like in ep 1 when they both made fun of skys awful hair or when she teased him Abt being a show off or like in that dragon taming episode where he was teasing her and she eventually managed to tame the dragon and he said “that’s my girl” (ok first of all If Anyone I was involved In romantically said that to me I wpuld fold immediately and secondly he said it in front of his professor😭😭😭 was gonna say he has balls of steel but honestly I’ll take it as he loves his gf a lot🗿) and of course the song writing a as cute and it’s the only time I’ll ever let a man getaway with public singing dedicated to his partner cause it’s so cringe for me but idk why for them i thought it was cute hahaha they honestly saved season 5 for me like I was eating up every crumb and interaction between them

OMG OMG OMG YEAHHHHHHH

Literally one of the saving graces of season 5 eat your fucking heart out season 4, and behold a season that actually understands Musa's personality

Tbh while I do like "getting together" stories, my favorite part of couples is seeing how they act when their together and established and s5 is FEEDING ME WELL WITH ALL THESE FUCKING ADORABLE RIVUSA MOMENTS

When Riven literally drove around to make sure that Musa could see that he saved the guy just like he asked her to do in the first episode, I'm still not over it. He was all like "!!!! Look I did the thing!!!" I am obsessed with him, and Musa teasing him for it by calling him a show off, I'll never recover

Riven just listing to Musa play the guitar with hearts in his eyes in s5 got me ok, and the way they snugly when up to each other and started flirting!!!!! Like yes their not suddenly going to super easily express their emotions over night, but their clearly TRYING and you have got me SOBBING ABOUT IT

Seeing Rivusa just getting to act like an established couple has reversed all the horrific damage s4 did to me mentally and emotionally with that horrible plot line. I genuinely want to know who in the writing room was stupid enough to think the girls would suddenly be super egotistical about their powers (interesting plot point when their mostly dating the nonmagical, but handled terribly) and Musa would mad at Riven for his actions. Not only would Musa and her actual standoffish personality never even give Andy the time of day, s3 confirmed that she isn't bothered by jealously just Riven not giving her attention/listening to her, and the way she was so mean about his gifts??? Like I can understand not liking or wanting them but she acted like Riven was giving her gifts to make her day worse, or was trying to intentionally make her upset, when it was clearly the opposite and I am quite annoyed. Musa would never. She go "awwww, you fucking idiot. He's allergic to those flowers, come here dumbass"

And the drama this season??? Makes SOOOOOO much more sense. Riven in s2 SENT people who had a crush on her to Musa. There's no way he couldn't of not known that Jared had a small crush on the Winx, and he intentionally sent him to Musa. Maybe because he thought he wouldn't be as good of a boyfriend to her, so he was trying to help in his own Riven way. And MUSA GOT PISSED!!!! Like she was so mad that Riven did that, and that combined with the fact that she smacked the shit out of Icy in s1 over a guy she wasn't even fucking dating, makes it pretty clear that Musa was originally the one more prone to jealously (until s3 when the writers begun falling on their one arc for Riven writing crutch and never got off of it) compared to Riven and I'm SO DELIGHTED TO SEE IT COME BACK

Usually it's the guys being the dumbasses and fucking up and it's just so lovely to see my favourite girl struggle with something I struggle with too!!! Like yeah!!!! Musa definitely has some major abandonment issues, if the way she pushes people away is any indication, some major trust issues in general, her bitey demeanor towards Stella and her tendency to expect people to read her mind makes me imagine she often thinks people know how she's feeling and are intentionally trying to hurt her when that's not the case. It's just so relatable!!!!!!

God I love seeing the girls fuck up and do stupid shit and make mistakes!!! Like YES, give me the GOOD SHIT!!!! Tecna's arc and Aisha's arc in s2 we're some of the best arcs in the show, watching them learn to be kinder and stuff 🥹🥹🥹 I am literally on the floor SOBBING this is why I love them so much, anyone who doesn't like them is WRONGGGF 😭😭😭

I love it when ANY character fucks up and makes mistakes, see: Riven is my favorite specialist, but there's been too much focus on the boys problems to the point where it just seems like they should break up and it's not mutual. But it is!!!! Sure Sky is over protective to a extreme, but Bloom is flighty and avoidant to an extreme. Riven and Musa have the same amount of abandonment issues, they both get jealous, they both struggle to communicate, they both can't control their emotions, ect (which is part of the reason they'd work so well together, and not so well with other people. Take it from someone with jealousy born of fear and very bad abandonment issues, there's NOTHING like seeing someone finally care about you the same amount you do when your expecting them to drop your ass at any moment. Like I know it's wrong but I can see where Musa is coming from in s3, the situation was extreme but pretending it wasn't, someone acting jealous over me immediately calms down my fears that they'll abandon me because they wouldn't do this if they were. Listen, I could write a whole essay about how well Musa and Riven's issues fit together from experience, but for now I'll let you know really well. Like they'll both have to put in the work to make their demons play nice but someone having the same issues as you, as they obviously do, is extremely comforting offering a level of understanding no one else can offer and they ABSOLUTELY PUT IN THE WORK!!! Musa would actually be the one more stubborn about it did you see Riven getting better in s2???? A TEAR TO MY EYE) Timmy has a cowardice problem and Tecna is way too aggressive and doesn't believe in silly things like "not sacrificing yourself for nothing", and they way s2 had them meeting in the middle 😭😭😭😭 how do more people not love s2??? Nabu and Aisha have NO FUCKING SOCIAL SKILLS, IN COMPLETELY OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS. Nabu is way too friendly, while Aisha is standoffish, and they both try to prove themselves by acting independently and hoping it helps like idiots shut up I'm in LOVE

Stella working on her issues with Brandon, sobbing, crying, I love s3. Want to see more of Brandon's issues please, and not that bullshit from later seasons where he's also stupid for some reason. Brandon has the most emotional intelligence of the guys and he's using it to hide his emotions, change my mind. Not to mention the way neither Helia or Flora could express their feelings without Chatta getting involved 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

For all of its stupid S5 has SUCH AMAZING MOMENTS

Like I get to see my favourite ship in this show act as a established couple and see Musa struggle with something that's been established since s1???? I'm in hysterics this is amazing

The only thing I want to take from s4 is characters and their motivations, Harmonix > Believix, every couple of episodes I see something new in s5 that's an amazing concept I want to use NOW!!! S5 is just peppered with all these amazing moments and for what???? How do you make the worst age changer sub plot I've ever seen in my fucking LIFE, right after one the best quest plot line with the test of confidence, one of the best written songs in ruby reef, and the superior Stella and Aisha are fighting subplot (looking at YOU s4); And right before one of the worst but adorable episode with one of the hands down BEST Trix spells, getting to see the boys be useful again, and THE BEST S5 FIGHT IN THE RAVINE

Do you see that??? Do you see how for every like, two god awful episodes that make me wanna scream with one or two fun things in them, there's an episode that ruins my life with amazing and interesting concepts that I am legally required to scream about???? Do you see that??? Why is s5 like this omgg, I never know if I'm going to get amazing or terrible. It's like Russian roulette

Anyways I'm obsessed with how hit and miss this season is, I'll defend it till I die but also it's awful and terrible and if you don't acknowledge all of it's crimes it will never be forgiven for weee r going to have to fight. Complexities

[notkageyamasprincess]

发｜miya atsumu x reader

{gif source}

characters: miya atsumu x f!reader

genre/warnings: fluff, tiny snippet of angst and smut (please do skip over it if you are a minor), hair pulling, rough sex, okay even though it’s a tiny crumb of smut it’s a bit filthy, underage drinking (for some countries), i do not condone this behaviour please do not engage in underage drinking

words: 1.0k

summary: miya atsumu and the different ways he touched your hair throughout your relationship. alternatively, a collection of moments in your lives from age six to age seventy.

notes: mmOKAY i know this sounds super strange but pleaseee trust me it’s actually really sweet, and not at all weird even though this lowkey seems like some kink or fetish. also since we’re talking about hair here, i know my descriptions aren’t inclusive of all readers in this one, so forgive me!

Age six: You sat in front of him in class and you came to school every day with your hair in bouncy, shining pigtails. They always dangled in front of him, looking very enticing. How could a boy resist? So, he grabbed one firmly in his hand, and yanked.

Age eleven: He had just gotten his ice cream cone from the stand when he stumbles over a pebble, causing him to lurch forward, accidentally getting some ice cream in your long locks. Uh oh. He frantically wipes at the mess with his napkin, attempting to clean the evidence before you noticed. He failed of course. Oh, you had noticed alright. He had no choice but to hand over the rest of his treat. You went home with sticky hair, but at least you had ice cream.

Age fifteen: You just experienced your first heartbreak. As you sobbed into his chest, Atsumu soothingly strokes the back of your head in consolation, wishing he could erase the pain. But he secretly thought that you were probably better off without that boy anyway. You deserved someone better. Someone like himself.

Age nineteen: The two of you were at a college party, releasing all the tension of exam season from your bodies. You definitely had a bit too much to drink, and obviously couldn’t hold your liquor as well as Atsumu. Consequently, you were presently knelt over the toilet bowl, emptying the contents of your stomach, which was mostly sugar and alcohol. Rookie mistake. He tsked as he held back your tangled tresses. “I told you to get food before coming. I’m taking you home after this. You’re going to have a nasty hangover tomorrow, you know.”

Age twenty-one: You finally confessed your feelings to each other. You’re currently at a ramen shop, on your first official date. Funnily enough, after going through all those men, you still ended up with the same boy you grew up with. As you leaned down to take a bite, he swept your hair over your shoulder so it doesn’t fall into the steaming soup.

Age twenty-two: Atsumu knocked on the door to your apartment, begging for forgiveness. You just had your first major fight. His hopeful eyes lit up as soon as he heard the lock click, but he frowned upon seeing your crumpled face. “Sweetheart, I’m so sorry, I said all those terrible things that I didn’t mean, I’m such an ass.” He took you into his arms and surrounded you in his comforting scent. “____, I don’t want to fight like this ever again. I love you.” You gazed up at him with watery eyes. “I love you too, ‘Tsumu. So much.” He wiped away your tears with his thumbs, tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, then caressed your face and kissed you deeply.

Age twenty-four: You finally moved in together. The air in your shared bedroom was unbearably hot, the bed creaked under your vigorous motion, and the headboard struck a continuous rhythm against the wall. He panted from behind you. “Shit, sweetheart, did you get even tighter since last time?” You heard him grunt as his rough hands gathered your hair into a messy ponytail, pulling you backwards to meet every thrust. You let out a lewd moan at the burning sensation on your scalp, loving the way it stung, getting lost in the pleasure. Your creaming pussy clenched around him as he quickened the pace, pounding into you impossibly fast, releasing a myriad of pretty sounds from your throat. “Fuck princess, just like that. Don’t get all shy on me now, let the neighbours hear your sweet voice. Give ‘em an unforgettable first impression, yeah?”

Age thirty: You relaxed under the hot stream of water as he kneaded your sore shoulders. Your belly was round and swollen at thirty-six weeks, and it’s become difficult to carry out simple tasks, such as showering. You purred as he lathered on the shampoo, massaging your head and washing away the oil and grime. “You’re so good to me, baby. I’m so lucky to have you.” “Trust me ____, I’m even more lucky.”

Age thirty-six: You and your husband were seated on a bench, watching your child run around in the playground. The abundant foliage of a hulking tree shielded you from the late autumn sun, and a mild breeze travelled across the park, twirling the leaves on each branch. One landed on the crown of your head, which Atsumu brushed away tenderly. You laid your head on his shoulder and sighed in happiness.

Age forty-two: The mellow glow of the sun filtered in through the blinds in your bedroom. Your child was downstairs enjoying breakfast while you got ready to drive them to school before work. You and Atsumu were in front of the bathroom mirror, brushing your teeth when you felt him collect your hair and loosely tie it back. “It wagh gettin’ into yer mouf,” he explained, through a mouth full of minty foam. You smiled at him fondly, finished brushing, and pecked him on the cheek before getting dressed.

Age fifty-three: You and Atsumu had just arrived home from the airport after sending your child off to their final semester of college. As you walked into the foyer, you glanced at the mirror in the hall, suddenly noticing that your silver hairs have grown in again. Initially, you only had a few strands, but they seemed to multiply every year. Later, you were settled into an armchair as Atsumu sifted through your roots, plucking out all the silver hairs he could find. When he completed his task, he placed a kiss on each of your temples and took your hands in his own. “You’re still the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”

Age seventy: You were sitting in front of your vanity, observing your husband behind you as he combed your hair into a neat style. It was part of your morning routine; he would help you get ready before you went on your morning walk. “____, did I already say that I love you today?” You laughed softly and beamed at him. “Yes Atsumu, you did. And I love you too.”

a/n: k why do i write about hair so much tbh?? also even though i read a healthy amount of smut, this is the first time i’ve ever written smut of any form and it’s probably a one-time thing…unless? akdjfhgd i’m kidding i’ll leave that to the experts until i’ve honed my smut writing skills ANYWAYS hope y’all find this enjoyable!

[tundrainafrica]

Do you think levihan is canon?

I’m guessing you’re not asking about my overall opinion on 139, so I’ll just leave it here as a Levihan opinion. I could probably do another rant about my overall opinion of the ending but probs another time.  

And I have been meaning to make this meta for a while and I kinda wanted to wait for the last chapter cause for some crazy reason, I was a clown hoping that Levihan would just suddenly happen? Like maybe in the paths, she walks to him or something 

But woop. We have to search again for the crumbs like we’re on some scavenger hunt. 

And you know what? I like it this way. Thank you Yams for not butchering your characters over one ship. Thank you for portraying so realistically what romance between two mature adults with responsibilities is actually supposed to look like. 

So yeah, before we go into it, I did go around asking about other ships and I realized, maybe we have been using the word ‘canon’ incorrectly. Or so, that’s the first thing I thought. 

I had a conversation with my sister a few days back (who hates Levihan if it isn’t obvious), and she used to be an avid Klaroline shipper back in the day (The Vampire Diaries), and she explained that a the fandom actually don’t see Klaroline as a canon couple even if they were teased throughout the show (fucked, kissed and everything in between) since it isn’t end game. 

So to lay out my terms here and just be incredibly clear about it. I consider Levihan canon, but I do not consider them end game because they obviously aren’t, 132 happened and Hange didn’t come back.. 

So what do i mean by canon? 

There are lots of nuances here to consider when we call them canon. 

For one, fandoms wait for the couple to be ‘official’ kiss and all. Other fandoms wait for the end before they say it, because no matter how many times two characters fuck, kiss and declare their undying love, if they don’t commit, if they don’t make it to the end, then it’s not canon. 

When I say Levihan is canon, I clearly mean,  even if they didn’t end up together, they probably could have still been in a relationship, they probably could have still been in love. They probably actually held a stronger and much more nuanced bond than whatever main couple we watch in some sappy romantic drama. 

And maybe they actually did fall in love behind closed doors? Maybe they meta-ed their own relationship together and maybe they’ve discussed it and maybe they were aware. ( have a meta about it here)

But here’s the thing, we’ll never know, because in Season 4, after A LOT of the development of their relationship could have been implied, Levi and Hange were separated from each other so we actually didn’t get a lot of scenes of them closely together until 115, 126 etc. 

And here is the part where people call me delusional? Because people who invalidate our ship like to do that.

Because yes.. They’re just ultra mega besties. 

AND I GET SO FRUSTRATED AT THIS TAKE. LIKE SINCE WHEN HAS ROMANCE EVER RUINED FRIENDSHIPS?

It doesn’t make any sense??? Like I have no idea how people are having relationships when the first they think when they get into a relationship is “I don’t wanna ruin this friendship,” 

I get confessing and rejecting can ruin a relationship but getting into a relationship? How does that ruin a friendship. 

I’m sorry I know that is such a trope but like yo, half the time when people ask about me and my boyfriend (who started of as bestfriends) WE GOT INTO THIS RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE WE WANTED TO BE ‘BESTIES’ IN OTHER DIMENSIONS AS WELL. 

AND WE WANTED TO BE SUPER ULTRA MEGA BESTIES (lovers in short). 

It is inevitable that you will be best friends with your partner. Yo, if your partner aint one of your besties or one of your most trusted confidants, you might wanna... you know, reevaluate your relationship???

There are so many layers to love than just kiss kiss smooch a

Like, I’m incredibly choosy with romance ships like if people noticed, I only ever have written this much for Levihan. 

And one main reason for this really is because writers have a tendency of messing with a story, doing things that don’t make sense so the couple that is slated to get together, actually ends up together.

And the development never seemed natural half the time? Because some writers are just obsessed with making their pair happen. And what do they do after? They put them into so much drama which makes me question the overall health of the relationship.

nd I dunno, media is probably messing with this perspective of love by saying obviously problematic relationships are canon. So yeah even if he punched his girlfriend ONCE, and even if she cheated on him ONCE, they probably still loved each other so they’re canon lmao.

And call me a puritan here or something but there are certain things people do in a relationship and when it happens I will just sit there and say, that ain’t love, do you guys even love each other? 

And sorry I’m probably that asshole friend who would probably hate your toxic partner and will probably just tell you I’m not showing up to your wedding if I don’t like your partner.

I will not condone cheating AT ALL. I personally do not want to consider ‘canon’ any relationship where two people cheat on each other. I personally do not wanna consider ‘canon’ a relationship that thrives on miscommunication issues either because I dunno if I just got into the wrong relationship or something? But like at the age of 24, we actually talk stuff out 

Like woah, there are couples who don’t talk things out? Like what do you do when you’re stuck with each other 24/7? NOt TALK? 

I will consider canon any ship that runs on implicit trust, this belief that they should be constantly there with each other. Because that’s what love is. That’s what a relationship is and I’m gonna live my whole life believing that these are the only things that make up love for me. 

Love is trust. Love is a strong bond. Love is just two people giving and taking and sacrificing for each other. And Love is this commitment to make something work with the other person. 

And if it isn’t any of the things above, ‘sorry for invalidating’ but it ain’t love and by extension, it ain’t canon for me.  

Tbh, I think that’s the reason Levihan has been incredibly uneventful relationship wise actually made it so much for me that I thought they were pretty much canon. I still have issues with how Eremika was pulled off even if they were blatantly canon and had more than enough blatant crumbs. 

Because sure Eren and Mikasa did love each other but I guess their relationship was just so problematic since the start that even I was like ‘do you guys really love each other?’ half the time and I was constantly thinking about Mikasa’s mental health there like yo, why you so obsessed with him. There’s literally a Jean there who would probably treat you 124543x better,  

But for Levi and Hange we had parallels with Eremika. And we had crumbs

With putting his crumbs for Levihan, from the airplane, unrequited titan love, let’s live together, Hange’s longing face and the Levi’s dedicate your heart and the fact that HANGE NEVER LEFT HIS SIDE UNTIL THEY DIED, come on, I don’t know what people aren’t seeing. 

But the point is, (Okay understandable since Levi and Hange are older), Personally I just believe Levi and Hange approached their relationship more like mature adults than hormonal teenagers. Like so sorry, they decided to approach their relationship like adults instead of some teenager who bird poops on any guy who tries to cheat on Mikasa. 

Here’s the thing, Hange probably never would have complained like Eren. I honestly believe it was totally in character for her to just look down on him longingly from the paths. And I personally believed Levi had approached their relationship with a kind of acceptance like ‘ ay yo, we’re too busy for this but maybe after the war?’ that’s why even towards the end, the only way he lets himself be reminded of her was through watching the airplane and thinking of her. *fudge I’m tearing up* 

I guess the fact that they really approached this relationship and this bond like how they’re characters were supposed to, the fact that they threw everything away for the sake of the war. Yet the fact that we saw ALL THIS CRUMBS that there could have been something more if they just weren’t captain and commander in the middle of the war, just makes this so fucking canon to me. 

I would probably be speculative if we just had 115? Or maybe just 126? Or maybe just 132? But the thing is, the crumbs never stopped coming. There were so many things Yams could have CHOSEN not to do. But he did everything so deliberately from ‘let’s live together’ to ‘unrequited love’ to the Eremika parallels. 

Did he have to draw that airplane in the air and Levi making eye contact with Onyakopon? Okay I wonder why he did that? Cause really what connects Levi to Onyakopon? WHAT PLANE SCENE CONNECTS LEVI TO ONYAKOPON? 

I dunno man, but really at this point, this is so canon. Like sure Eremika takes the cake for most blatantly canon. 

But given the terms I’ve stated above for what I believe romance, love, relationships and canon is for me. 

Levihan is canon and it probably is the most canon relationship for me. Because the blatant lack of drama in the portrayal of their relationship for me just proves, Levi and Hange were very sure about their relationship with the other, I could probably say they were the two surest people in love in the whole damn show. 

THEY JUST COULDN’T GET TOGETHER BECAUSE OF CIRCUMSTANCES. (WHICH MAKES THEM ALL THE MORE ADMIRABLE ANYWAY)

So thanks for reading and sorry about this major ass rant. 

[wyn-n-tonic]

We Can Stay Like This Forever

Word Count: 2,385 Warnings: Uh... yearning. A crumb of smut. Dialogue heavy bullshit tbh. Author's Note: God okay, I've been sitting on this for like a month now? I wrote this when I couldn't focus on my own characters anymore and my brain needed to visualize parts of the scene I was trying to write using the body language of a character I already know and love so well. This is written in second person but the reader has a name. It was an experiment dashed out in a drunken fervor that made my editor weep. Anyway, if you see any of these lines in a book one day... no you don't.

MASTERLIST

“Javi, I haven’t loved you since I was twent—“

“That's bullshit and you know it,” he interrupts, voice coming out hard but arms crossed tighter than they have been all night, replacing the pressure of kevlar he’s so used to. Protective, defensive, stopping the bullets from reaching him where it matters the most.

Your lips are raw from dragging your teeth across them but biting down is the only thing that stops the tears from springing to the surface. You never thought you’d see him again, you never thought he’d be standing in your kitchen only strides away; two for him, four for you. You saw the news coming out of Colombia, heard it in the supermarket passed from ear to ear straight from his dad’s mouth. Javier Peña was the walking dead.

Javi left Lorraine for you. You gave him a choice and he made it and you, being certain he’d lean the other way, couldn’t live with that guilt. When you wrote that first letter, you didn’t expect a response. You just wanted to apologize, you wanted him to know that you were sorry. You didn’t expect to hear his voice on the other end weeks later when you picked up the phone. Hell, you had pushed the letter so far out of your mind that you’d forgotten you’d included your number.

And now he’s standing in front of you, tangible as ever. No longer just the boy you loved but a man aged so roughly by sun and stress that you are breaking within wishing that you had been there to smooth it all over.

“Goddamn it, Clara,” that hard tone reaches towards you again but he loosens his stance, the toned arms still holding close to his body but the tension bottoming out to his exhaustion, “are you going to say anything or are you going to just keep looking at me like I’m a fucking ghost?”

“Is that not what you are?” Your voice is broken when you find it again, the tears really do come now. “A ghost from my past come back to haunt my bad decisions? Tell me I fucked up?”

“Is that what you think I’m here for? Is that why you think I came to you first thing instead of my family?” He exhales a breath you didn’t realize he was holding and drags a hand through his hair, pinning you in place with his eyes. “Can I smoke in here?”

“I thought you quit.”

“Yeah well,” another exhale, the slightest hint of laughter on his lips, “I thought a lot of things I’ve been wrong about too.”

And god, those eyes. Simultaneously the warmest, softest brown but so black they look like blown out pupils. Like he’s the one who’s been snorting the cocaine, not busting those that do. You don’t even register the insult before nodding your head. What’s a little cigarette smoke when you run the risk of him walking out that door and not coming back?

But isn’t that what you want? Isn’t that the purpose of this conversation? Are you not being the same bitch you were all those years ago praying that he’ll be the one to walk out on you this time? Bringing it back full circle to that decision you forced on him half a lifetime ago?

“Yeah?” He doesn’t sound sure and even though your eyes are anywhere but on his now, you haven’t felt his leave you this whole time.

“Yeah,” you whisper to your feet like they’re the most interesting goddamn thing in the world.

After years of practice, he’s quick about it, you don’t even realize he’s lit up until he lets go of that first puff and, with it, the entire room changes. It’s not angry, it’s not hard, it’s… twenty years of heartache and longing compounding, neither party believing they’re good enough for the other.

You look back at the tired man standing in front of you, “Javier, I—“

“No. No, let me talk,” he rubs his eyes with his free hand, drags it down his golden cheek and smirks. Another inhale and, “I didn’t come here to tell you that you fucked up, you’ve said it plenty. We’ve been talking for months, we fell back in stride like nothing ever happened, like I hadn’t spent years pretending every woman I fucked was you because it was like you’d never left my side. Almost twenty-five hundred miles, Clara, I was a world away from you and when I came home at the end of the day the last six months…” he’s the one biting his lip now, “I could call you no matter the time and the sound of your voice made me feel like a normal person. Like I still had a shot at this world beyond the bounty on my head.”

His exhaustion, his softness, is palpable now as he stops to suck in a breath like he hasn’t taken one this whole time and then…

“If you didn’t love me, you wouldn’t have written. If you didn’t love me, you would’ve hung up. If you didn’t love me, you wouldn’t answer the phone at one o’clock in the fucking morning to tell me to breathe through the anger and the sadness and the horror I witnessed. But if that’s the story you want to stick with, I’ll go. I don’t expect anything I just…” his voice hitches, the cigarette long forgotten between his fingers, “I just wanted to see if your face still lights up when you laugh or if that had changed after two decades. It hasn’t and it’s still both my favorite sight and sound in the world. I’m sorry I didn’t fight harder to watch it grow through the years.”

He looks to the right of him and throws the cigarette in the sink. Pushing off the counter with his other hand, he takes one step forward and fixes his eyes on yours again. “Tell me I’m wrong, Clara. Tell me you don’t love me and I won’t ever darken your home aga—“

“I love you.”

And he’s on you. Just like that. Just one more step to close the distance and his body presses to yours. His large hands come up to cradle your jaw and his nose slots perfectly into place against yours and his lips touch down like a plane with faulty landing gear, crashing against yours all hot breath and stale tobacco and, oh god, the smell of him. Soap and sweat, the chemical make up of his scent flooding your senses to make you feel whole again when you didn’t even know how much you missed it.

His hands are sliding down gently, wrapping around your waist and pulling you closer. With his strong arms lifting you away from the counter, you no longer need to support yourself against it and you’re grabbing for him, trying harder to wring the space from between you like a worn rag but nothing is left.

The feel of him is something new, however. He’s not that scrawny kid who awkwardly held you to him, unsure of how his touches were affecting your body and pleasure. No, this Javier is different. Older, experienced, more tender than you remember him ever being, so sure of himself and just… thicker. Two shirt sizes up from the man you walked away from, his formerly wiry muscles are almost bubble wrapped in a way. What used to knot against you in hard planes of flesh and bone now give quietly against your touch as you’re pulling at the only thing that separates you now.

But suddenly, he’s breaking away. All heavy breaths and wildly flushed cheeks, his lips have left yours and the ache you numbed in his absence returns like a migraine after sleep. You need him and he’s gone again and you’re chasing his kiss with a whine as he replaces his lips with a thumb, cradling your face once more and shushing you, “Cálmate, mi amor. Está bien. Are we moving too fast right now?”

And you are breathless as you answer, “We are not moving fast enough, Javier.”

“I just don’t want you to think that this is all that I want. That you will wake to find an empty bed tomorrow.”

“If I woke to find an empty bed tomorrow, that’s exactly what I’d deserve.”

Those eyebrows knit up in confusion, the lines that have made their home on his forehead making you simultaneously weak in their beauty as evidence of his life and sad in the tragedy that you weren’t there to watch him earn them.

“Clarita,” his tone is so soft, the endearment coming to him as naturally now as it did in the before, “If it’s punishment you think you deserve then I’m here to tell you that you’re wrong. I chose you, you didn’t beg for it. I did that of my own accord. And when you chose to walk away because you felt guilty, I did beg you. I’ll own it, I begged and pined but you couldn’t get out of your own head long enough to see that you were never the issue, you were the solution. You still are. I have searched for you in everybody I’ve ever met. So tell me,” his hands are wrapping around your arms now, “Are you ready to forgive yourself and find me in your bed tomorrow morning?”

“Yes,” comes barely audible through parted lips as his find yours once more, knocking the breath from your chest as his hands slide down to your hips. He digs his fingers into the denim there and slowly starts to guide you through the home that’s not his thinking, correctly, that the only door at the end of the hallway is the destination he really booked from Bogotá.

And he is burning a hole through you, his entire being set on fire against you in the already blazing Texas heat. He is gentle as he pushes you down, climbing on top with one arm out to break both your falls. His shirt was abandoned somewhere in the kitchen, shoes kicked off in the hallway with your shorts not far behind. His belt buckle is riding against you as he rocks his hips down, forgetting the metal between you in his hunger for you to feel him.

He feels you wince, the whine swallowed between his lips but he’s pulling back like he’s electrocuted you. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” your hands are shaking as you take advantage of the space between, “just take your pants off.”  

He hits you with that crooked smile and meets your hands where they’re still trembling at his hips and, god, he’s swift. He wastes no time kicking off his jeans and falling back into you, pressing back into you. You can feel him straining against his briefs but his patience is unmatched as he savors every taste of your mouth, every nip at the warm skin of your neck and chest. His hands are exploring the years that have marked your body as you mentally catalogue the scars that have taken over his.

He’s pushed your shirt up as far as it will go without leaving you but when he finally does to lift it away, the separation is so quick that it feels like nothing. He’s everywhere and you’re delirious, half thinking you’re imagining him moaning into you as he takes your hand in his to put it where he wants it.

You almost think…but, no, that’s not how that works. Your brain is fucking with you, unable to reconcile the man on top of you with the memory of the boy you loved once upon a time. But you swear, he’s bigger. He holds his breath as your hand slides between him and his waistband and he’s looking down at you like he’s never been touched at all. The sadness showcased across the softness of his face is made worse by the sheen of sweat and blush across his nose. You’d almost believe it if you couldn’t feel the heartbeat in his hardness, waiting for you to make the next move.

After two beats of aching silence, looking up into the galaxies he has the audacity to call eyes, your other hand moves to push at his waistband. If you thought he was urgent before, the graceful rush to join your efforts is gold medal worthy. Your senses are delayed, you’re not sure if the sound of fabric hitting the ground comes before or after he’s ripping at the only bit of fabric that separates you now.

“Fuck,” he rests his forehead to yours, “I'll buy you another pair.” The confusion bubbles into laughter as you realize that, yes, he actually tore them from your body.

But the bubbling laughter in your throat squeezes into a tight gasp, the air punched from your lungs as he steadies himself against you. His long fingers are brushing your hair to the side as he leans down and whispers against your lips, “Can I?”

“Please,” but your begging is lost in his response before the word has fully left your lips. He is grabbing in a way you haven’t felt in years. Hungry, like he can’t get enough, like it’s all he needs.

It is devastating, the build up. He’s ripping through the deepest parts of you and you’re convinced, wholeheartedly, that the only truth you’ve ever known rides on the waves of his name. His grip tightens, his teeth dragging down your jawline and warmth takes over as an earthquake shatters what little composure you’ve kept.

He moans low in his throat once.

Twice.

Three times it dies out against your ear like it’s only meant for you. Like it was all only meant for you.

He’s smiling as he softens, you can hear it in his voice as he slowly asks, “Can we just stay like this for a minute?”

You press your lips to that dimple, singular and lonely on the right side of his face; so far gone from a five o’clock shadow, you’d almost think he’s been forty all his life.

“Javier,” your fingers wind tighter through the sweat slick curls at the crown of his head, “we can stay like this forever.”

TAGLIST: @justanotherblonde23​ | @greeneyedblondie44​ | @icanbeyourjedi​ | @princess76179​ | @bbuckysbeardd​ | @notcookiebelle​ | @knivesareout​ | @empress-palpat1ne​ | @phoenixpascal​ | @lexi-b-writes​ 

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

Vmin Vlive Asks

From anon: saw on twitter people asking for vmin vilive again. If vmin were just friends it wouldn't be a problem streaming together, or if they hated each other as some say they would be professional enough to stream together without any problems. But since they don't, it's because it's difficult, even as a professional, because vmin is so cute with each other. just a thought.

From anon 2: It saddens me that we still haven't got a Vmin live/selfie. It really makes me wonder. Surely they can go an hour without flirting/touching/exposing themselves, right lol? Same with a selfie. V did a live with JK and JM did one with JK, last year. V uploaded a selfie of him and JK on NYE, but when it comes to Vmin we barely get crumbs. Not saying I expect it, but it raises the question of what the big deal is kinda. Worst part is antis see it as confirmation that Vmin aren't close. Makes me sad.

From anon 3: What are your thoughts on why we haven't seen Vmin selfies or vlives in a while? Same with Jikook. Nothing from them either. Do you think Jimin just isn't wanting to for some reason? Even TK uploaded a selfie on NYE and then we got Tae in a video, in a rush to get their selfie uploaded. Kinda makes me sad. Not cause T/JK uploaded a selfie, but I just wish Vmin would throw us a bone. Since we haven't seen any selfies/lives with J/k**k either, seems maybe its on Jimin's end why we aren't. Maybe?

Perhaps this is a moment where being a namjinist is quite a handy thing since we’re rather used to a lack of selcas, even if there are moments that we know (and even saw) them take some together and yet we never got to see the selca, meaning they took them merely for themselves as memory. Which kind of makes it actually much cuter, but that’s besides the point. Same goes for vlives, before the RJRJ vlive Summer 2020, we had to wait a very long time for a namjin vlive. Perhaps I’m just desensitized to this wish of a joined vlive, not that I wouldn’t want one, I very much do, but I’m used to just…not getting one, I suppose?

Admin 2 has actually written a post early on into our time on tumblr about their theories regarding the potential of a vmin vlive and how chances are we will likely not get one, at least not any time soon. Looking at anon 2’s question if they would really not be able to go an hour without flirting or touching or doing something else that could “expose” them—I’d like for us to remember their “Radio” for Japanese ARMY where they basically spent the entire time talking softly/sweetly with each other, Jimin calling the way Tae wrote words on a whiteboard “cute” (the video was deleted but this is at least the translation of this), how he wasn’t able to open a pen so he softly asked Tae do it for him, and how Jimin did this funny charade move which Tae claimed was “Jimin waking up” resulting in Jimin playfully/cutely “hitting” Tae’s chest (1:28 onward). And that’s edited content, yet it’s so sweet and full of little tender vmin moments.

Now imagine that but without editing and happening live.

Of course, Jimin and Tae are absolute professionals at their job, I don’t have any kind of doubt about it, but perhaps it’s just something they’ve decided they don’t want to do (despite Jimin’s initial “promise” of talking Tae into doing it with him, and Tae saying “okay” on the phone when asked about it). Not due to a lack of possibilities or time, not due to a lack of self-control both verbal and physical wise, but due to some completely different reason only they know. We know what literal hellscape the comments during vlives are, so imagine what kind of nightmare the comments during a vmin vlive would be…it makes me sad and furious just thinking about it. Considering the comments are already full of hate and shipping related comments and questions when they do solo vlives. Or how hateful people were when Jimin, Seokjin and Yoongi did their Just Dance vlive together in 2020, how Seokjin was basically accused of “getting in the way” of y*onm*n and far, far worse things, even though all three of them were having so much fun together.

We know how much certain people despise vmin and any (cute) interactions between Jimin and Tae that show that all their wishes or claims that “they hate each other” and “have drifted apart” are not true. Also, remember how Tae posted their ITS bed selca on weverse and was flooded with hate for it? I admit, that was in parts due to “bad timing” (or rather people being unable to stop demanding things from Bangtan without immediately turning hateful but that’s a whole different story) but in larger parts due to it going against “popular agendas”.

“Worst part is antis see it as confirmation that Vmin aren't close. Makes me sad.” If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my years as ARMY, as well as vminnie and namjinist, it’s that the opinion of antis is worth less than dirt. Even dirt is more useful, tbh. They can think whatever they like, but the good thing is, their opinion and whatever they think is a “confirmation” of their agenda, it doesn’t affect the truth and the reality of Jimin’s and Tae’s bond in any kind of way. So, please, don’t let their noisiness make you sad. Literal antis are not worth our times. Not in relation to vmin and not in relation to BTS in general.

“Not cause T/JK uploaded a selfie, but I just wish Vmin would throw us a bone.” While I know what you mean, I’d like to remind you, and everyone else, that we’ve gotten a whole mountain of bones in recent weeks between RUN and other content like Winter Package. We might not have gotten any selcas or vlive, but we got so many other things, do they not count? Besides, we’ve made it five years without vmin vlive, I think we’ll be okay, no?

So, it’s okay to hope we might get a vlive from Tae and Jimin together one day, as well as a selca, if they’ve decided against it behind the scenes, we should respect and accept that. In the end, if they’ll one day do decide to do a vlive or post a selca out of the blue, imagine how happy we’d be.

Instead let us look forward with anticipation and excitement for tomorrow’s Grammy performance and hopefully their first win, even though I’ll forever be salty about the organizers putting their category in the pre-show instead of making it part of the main gala despite knowing that their category is basically the most anticipated one this year. As well as most of the categories with POC nominees being outside of the main gala. Very telling.

Then again, like that one Forbes article once said:

[ironxkid]

why don't you like endgame or civil war

((hoo buddy, idk what brought this up but salt under the cut!! Like... a lot of salt - specifically regarding Endgame lmao

I’m gonna start off with CACW because it’s a short response lol

I don’t like it simply because I was done with the infighting between the Avengers. The found family crumbs we were given in Endgame was something I really wanted to see, and them just... ripping them apart frustrated me lol

honestly, the movie was... fine? Idk, I found it to be a lil slow for my taste (it felt like it just dragged on when I watched it in theaters), and I just don’t care for it in general  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Also, ngl, I’m really bummed that Captain America: Serpent Society was a joke announcement because that sounds dope as hell and I really wanted to see that before I realized it’d been a joke dfgjhdsfhj

but, yeah, literally just because CACW is specifically an infighting movie annoys me to no end so I just won’t watch it again dgsfjhsfdhj

now, Endgame?

fuck Endgame

I. have a lot of issues with it, all of which are major grievances throughout the fandom. I’m pissed they killed Natasha and didn’t even bother giving her a fucking funeral because, I quote from Joe Russo, “Well, Tony does not have another movie. Tony is done. And Natasha has another film. And Marvel Universe obviously does not have to move forward linearly anymore. But that character still has more screen time coming.” (see here) and that annoys the hell out of me. She’s getting another movie - great! So you killed one of the few characters doing her fucking best to keep everything together at the compound, the one who was taking charge, give her a big role, and then murk her and... give her nothing but a brief mention at the end. Like... what the fuck? Natasha deserved so much better than what she was given. Tony’s funeral could’ve (and, frankly, should’ve) been a funeral for him, Natasha, and Vision because god forbid we see anyone mourn Vision other than Wanda

(actually this post covers how Endgame fucked over the MCU women perfectly, though Wanda’s not mentioned :c )

plus... Tony’s not done lol - he’s still a massive figure in the films/shows despite RDJ not acting in them, so his character has left shockwaves that aren’t dying any time soon. Natasha... basically disappeared, and I believe she would’ve been dropped completely if it wasn’t for the fact she does have a film coming out soon. Which, frankly, seems awesome and all, but it’s a film that goes back to post-CACW pre-IW and... frankly doesn’t give me any reason to understand why that means she didn’t get a funeral. She’s not coming back in future movies/shows that are in present MCU timeline - her movie is set in the past. She could’ve gotten a decent sendoff 

now, Clint’s arc as Ronin rubs me the wrong way. I know it’s a huge thing in the comics, and it’s not him taking a different mantle that I have an issue with. It’s the fact he, a white man, went around murdering people and got off scot-free. Yes, he was targeting genuinely bad people, but... to show that, they specifically singled out Mexican cartels and the yakuza (Japanese mafia, essentially) - so, in other words, the bad guys were people of color! I feel like I don’t need to explain how fucked up that is. And, to clarify, I love Clint! Clint is honestly one of my favorite characters, and the whole thing was just handled... poorly in the film

Tony’s arc genuinely hurts. This is a man who has suffered for years and has tried to make things right, and finally got a chance to settle down. He finally retired from the Avengers, finally settled down, and had a fucking life he could enjoy despite his ghosts, and yet... His arc ends with a message of “tortured soul finally gets rest by dying”. Because, y’know, it’s great seeing yet another long-suffering character only reaching peace through death, because god forbid they let characters heal! He could’ve still caused the second Snap, and he could’ve survived. He could’ve finally been able to step away for good and focus on his family, focus on recovering, and be truly happy. What’s so wrong with letting him stay alive so he can rest and be with his family? What’s so wrong with letting a long-suffering character finally find peace after one last bang? 

plus it pisses me off that they’re now using him as a reasoning as to why bad things are still happening. Why is this person the bad guy? Because Tony Stark somehow may or may not have done something that hurt them! Even though most of that really stems from Howard or Obadiah. Tony just ends up getting the blame in their place. He’s just an easy target to use, much like the tesseract seems to be the go-to answer for why things go wrong. But this is a different train of thought

Steve’s ending pisses me off just as much as the next person lmao. You take a character who has acknowledged he no longer belongs in the past (which, funnily enough, was written by the Russos), aaaaaaand have him go back to the past while ignoring two important people in his life that were still right there. He got Bucky and Sam back, and he leaves them. His arc is ruined within a matter of minutes, and it paints a hella bad picture of him in the process. He goes back in time to stay with Peggy (which ultimately destroys her own arc, and the fact she’s a person outside of her relationship (or lack thereof) with him because, y’know, why have her be able to move on and be her own person?), and we’re supposed to believe he’s fine with everything he knows from the future? Fine with knowing Bucky’s trapped with HYDRA and is suffering as the Winter Soldier? Fine with knowing HYDRA has infested SHIELD from day one? Fine with knowing Howard and Maria are going to die? Fine with royally fucking up the timelines? We’re supposed to believe he sat back and did nothing with all of that? They could’ve had him still hand the shield over to Sam - they could’ve let Steve stay an Avenger without the mantle

also the fact the Russos said he didn’t recognize Red Skull when he returned to Vormir to return the soul stone? Like... what the fuck?? Not to mention he literally returns the stone to Vormir, which “soul for a soul”, and they didn’t bring Nat back that way??

and now onto Thor. Thor... holy fuck is this hitting something personal for me. Thor was ridden with guilt - he was furious with himself, hated himself, and blamed himself for failing to stop the Snap. He fell into a massive depression, and... was promptly danced around as laughing stock. Like, “oh! look at Thor! he’s fat and drunk because he’s depressed haha!” - like fuck off. It’s not funny in any form. His suffering was made into a joke and it pisses me off because I suffer from depression. A lot of people suffer from depression. It’s not funny. It’s fucking terrifying at times. I wasted a shit ton of money on a stupid online sim game because it was a distraction - it gave me... god, I wouldn’t even say temporary happiness, but it gave me something to temporarily help, and I still hate myself for doing it. It was a poor decision on my part, and I wish I could change it. And, during that time, I was scared because I couldn’t see myself pulling out of it. I thought I was gonna feel that way forever. I called out of work multiple times because there were days I couldn’t stop crying (something I still feel horrible for doing), I couldn’t get myself to contact any of my friends for months, and it was all because the medication I was on at the time... stopped working. Thankfully, my depression doesn’t work in a way that makes me a danger to myself, so that wasn’t an issue, but it still fucking sucked. And to see a character that I could relate to on such a personal level treated as laughing stock fucking hurt. I’m not sharing this for sympathy - I’m sharing this because it Thor’s arc hit home and it’s literally the main reason why I will not watch Endgame again

this is more of a nitpick than anything else, but... I didn’t really care for Carol in it tbh? Which is unfortunately because Captain Marvel is one of my absolute favorite movies! And I’m well aware she was introduced in Endgame while CM was being drafted, but that in itself is annoying?? Because Carol was originally going to be introduced in AoU, but was cut because it wasn’t going to introduce her character properly. And yet they decide to introduce her character in a clusterfuck of a movie before her movie is in the final stages, and proceed to release her movie first and then give a complete different characterization in her following appearance

honestly I just wanna cover this now to clarify some things regarding Carter and her backstory: the only reason I keep Endgame as is is because it felt easier for me to do so for the purpose of bending canon for specific threads. I wanted to stay as true to the given plots as possible to help with fudging of both the movies and her background, and also because I didn’t want anyone to feel like I was trying to force my own headcanons onto them, y’know? 

I’m just gonna plug this here because fuck it lol, but I did start a fix-it fic regarding Endgame that you can read here! I... probably won’t finish it tbh, and I haven’t gone over it in a hot minute so it might be riddled with errors ahah - plus I’m not sure about how I wrote the characters! I get nervous when writing canon characters because I feel like I’ll miss their characterization completely, which is actually why I,,, rarely rp canon characters dgfjhgsfdhj

also the image in the doc was created by @/archervale!! 

[all-you-need-is-paul-mccartney]

Across The Universe (Paul McCartney x Female!Reader)

A/N: Yeah, I’m totally about to drop this, and a new chapter for TCND today. I don’t know how many of y’all like the Beatles, but I wrote this, and wanna see if anyone will really want another part.

OKAY SO I’m gonna say right now that I do not own, or are affiliated with the Beatles in any way (RIP), and this story is based off of/ heavily inspired by the 2007 movie Across The Universe, but the main characters, Jude and Lucy, are represented as Paul and the Reader. All of the characters mentioned, or are in this chapter (Other than Vick) are either real people, or characters from the movie. 

Although all of the descriptive writing is mine, the concept was taken from the movie. A lot of the writing here has been altered from the movie to better fit the characters and situations they are in. I’ve added/ changed parts that weren’t in the movie in the first place, and I left a little out, again, for the purpose of the plot to kinda make more sense. This fic will be more focused on the relationship developing between the two love interests than in the movie, so lots of iconic scenes from the movie (Such as Prudence’s first scene, Jojo’s introduction to New York, etc) won’t be included in the fic, though those characters will make appearances at some point.

I will make up for the lack of content there with more scenes of Paul and the Reader interacting/ in situations that didn’t happen in the movie.

I advise you watch Across The Universe, or have already watched it before you read to prevent spoilers, bc there will probably be a lot of those. (Watching it when high makes it even better tbh, there’s some trippy stuff in that)

A L S O , In this AU, the Beatles do not exist, although it is set in the 60′s!! Paul is legit just a 23 year old guy who wants to see the world.

Summary: Paul decides to head to the United States; You say good bye to your boyfriend before he leaves for Vietnam.

WARNINGS: Swearing, mentions of War, Mike McCartney calling Paul out on some bs, probably a couple of grammar errors bc it’s like... 5:30 AM where I am, and I haven’t slept yet :)

This little fic will be rated T. just because of the swearing

Prom went just as you'd expected it to: You had a nice meal, and did some wonderful dancing with your boyfriend. Despite the blisters on your feet from your shoes, you disregarded them as a temporary memory of one of the last times you'd see Daniel before he took off for the war.

When he got the letter in the mail, he opened it in your presence. Up until the day he died, he felt guilty for making you one of the first to know of his draft.

He cried in your arms for a long while, and you put all your strength into holding your tears back to bring him comfort in such a difficult time.

America had only just entered the Vietnam War, and it didn't seem real to any of you until the day Daniel got that fucking letter.

After talking it over with him, Daniel proposed that the both of you should just enjoy the remaining time you had before he'd have to leave.

And that's what put you here, in the passenger seat of Daniel's car, his mouth leeched onto your neck as his fingers tangled themselves in your hair.

"My mum and dad are home," you explained gently; solemnly. Daniel pulled away from your neck, instead moving to rest his lips on your forehead. "Of course."

He pulled away completely then, stepping out of the car and moving to the other side to hold your door open for you.

You stepped out, and Daniel interlaced his fingers with yours as you both walked up the drive to your house. The both of you listened to the clicks of Daniel's shoes on the pavement-- you were barefoot, your heels hanging from your fingers.

When he'd brought you up the porch, you turned to lean against one of the house's banisters. Daniel saw the look on your face, the one that just screamed 'please don't leave.'

"I'll be home soon," he said confidently, reaching out to squeeze one of your hands. "They give you a furlough after boot camp."

"And after that?" You never got a verbal response. Daniel just wrapped his arms around you tightly. You squeezed your eyes shut, and hugged him back with all the strength you had.

_____________________________

And at this time, across the Pond in Liverpool, England, Paul McCartney was walking home his girlfriend Molly, who he'd been out at a bar with all night, drinking and dancing to the live bands said bar had to offer that evening (and morning).

"Who'll take me out next week? You'll be halfway around the world." She threw a glance over her shoulder, and all Paul could do was offer her a cheeky smile.

"Well it better not be Phil Scully."

Honestly, Paul knew he deserved the shove Molly gave him not moments later, but he just threw his arms around her with a laugh as they turned down her street.

Paul tried to slip into his back door as quietly as he could, being sure to force a fake cough so he could discreetly lock the door.

He was finally safe. He took the time to puff out the air he'd been holding in his lungs, and he rested his forehead against the door.

"... Finally back, I see?"

Paul cringed.

Fuck.

"Yeah... sorry, Dad."

Paul turned around, and sure enough, there his father was: at the table, an empty plate of crumbs sitting in front of him, a cup of tea in his hand, and the Liverpool Echo in the other.

"Your brother just got home, too," Mr. McCartney mumbled as he brought his mug to his lips.

"He was with his girlfriend."

"I was, too," Paul defended as he opened the refrigerator and snagged an apple off one of the shelves before kicking the door shut and leaning against the counter.

Mike, Paul's brother, had just stepped into the kitchen with the same intention as Paul: getting breakfast.

"Mornin!'"

Paul nodded his head to his brother, mouth already full of apple.

"But I know who Mike's girlfriend is, James."

"Ooh," Mike smiled wickedly. He'd come in at just the right time. "Yeah, James, Dad knows who my Bird is."

Paul cringed a little at the name. James. The only people he really allowed to call him James was his parents.

"I just haven't... found the right time to introduce her, 's all," Paul excused after he swallowed. To avoid saying anything else, he went in for another bite of the fruit.

"No, it's because I actually love my girlfriend," Mike chortled as he popped a slice of bread in the toaster by Paul's arm, which just resulted in a playful shove from his older brother.

"I love my girlfriend," He argued back.

"But have you even told her that?"

Paul rubbed the back of his neck. "Well... not exact--"

"Point proven," Mike pointed to his brother, eyeing his father proudly.

"Look, all I'm saying, James, is that clearly, if you're stalling an introduction, you don't plan on keeping her 'round," Mr. McCartney explained.

"Dad, it's... it's complicated." Paul was rubbing the back of his neck again before taking another bite from his apple.

"There's just no point in wasting your time with someone you're just gonna throw away,"

"Whoa whoa whoa," Paul put his hands up at his brother's comment. "Who said anything about throwing anyone away?!"

"Well, you are going to America in a couple of days," Mike pointed out, grinning widely as his toast popped. He moved around the kitchen for a knife and some butter from the table.

"You really gonna stay with her when you're gonna have all those single American girls around to choose from?"

Paul didn't answer. He just shoved the apple into his mouth, rolled his eyes, and moved to the other side of the room, where the staircase leading upstairs was located.

He took a seat on the first two steps as he continued eating away at his breakfast.

"Paul, when I was your age-- maybe even younger than you, I met your mother. I knew she was The One after our first date. I took her home to meet my parents immediately."

Paul waited patiently for his father to get to the point.

"If you're not bringing her 'round, maybe she ain't the right one. Just think about it."

No one really said much else. Mike had started eating his toast, and Mr. McCartney turned his attention back to the paper, so Paul went upstairs.

He shut the door to his room when he arrived, and sighed happily at the sight of his bed. He climbed right on without taking his coat off. He kicked his legs up and stared at the ceiling as he finished off his apple, tossing the core into the waste bin next to him.

He understood where his father was coming from, and maybe he was right. But, Paul wasn't exactly looking for a long-term partner like all his other friends had done after they graduated from school.

Even Mikey had hopped onto that gravy train.

Paul was twenty-three. He still had plenty of time to find a girlfriend and settle down. That's why he decided to take off to The Land Of Opportunity. He wanted to get out and experience what it was like outside his dreary hometown before he devoted the rest of his life to a wife and kids, and living as a boring, stereotypical family until the day he died.

Did he have a Visa to legally work in America?

Fuck no. But it's not like that was gonna stop him from finding some form of income, whether or not it was technically legal.

Paul sat up in his bed, turning to peer into his closet.

He was pulling his suitcases from there moments later, and he unzipped all of them to begin packing. There was nothing he really needed to pack rather than his clothes, cigarettes, passport, a photo of his mother, and a small notebook containing all the phone numbers he'd had to keep over the years.

His cousin's number was the one he was particularly packing the book for. Paul managed to convince him to make room for him at his place he shared with his friends just outside the Princeton University Campus, where he was currently studying.

"You're a lifesaver, Vick" Paul mumbled as he tossed the book into one of the suitcases, and zipping it back up.

_____________________________

"Sometimes I feel like you're not tellin' me everythin'," Molly mumbled as she pulled away from the swelling kiss Paul was trying to leave her before he parted for America.

"I just need a break from here, Molly. I'll be back before you know it," he tried to comfort her with his gentle words, but she just looked upset. 

"N'd a break from me," it sounded more like a statement.

"Don't be ridiculous," he offered a smile, but when she didn't really react to it, Paul slipped his fingers into her hair, and threw it behind her shoulder.

"I'll be missing you by tomorrow,"

"I bet," she mumbled, eyes fixed on a pebble on the sidewalk between her feet.

Paul pinched her chin, and tilted her head so she was looking right at him. He looked more serious now.

"I'll write home everyday."

"You better."

"N'd I'll send all my loving to you."

And that's all it took.

"You bastard," Molly tried concealing her grin, but Paul had her wrapped around his finger, and she gave in to his charm.

And not long after, she was giving into another one of his desperate kisses.

_____________________________

"I promise, every day I'll write, babe. I love you so much," Daniel rushed his words out between quick kisses he left on your lips, his hands squeezing your own tightly. He pulled away soon enough to give you a smile, and then the car he was in started driving away. 

His hands slipped away from yours, and you suddenly felt cold.

You wanted to chase after the car, but your feet stayed glued to the road. Your heart felt strained as you watched the car drive off and around the corner.

Good-bye, Danny.

_____________________________

A/A/N: If you want me to continue on with this, please let me know! I really really like the Beatles, and I wanted to give Paul x Reader a try. As always, likes, replies, and reblogs are always appreciated. And I promise, the next chapter to this will be much, much longer, if y’all want it enough <3

[zitkaplushie]

nightwing secret files liveblog:

this is gonna be a long one so it’s under a cut!

taking wing-

is that jason??

i like this 'a christmas carol' type exposition i'm ngl

i'm not sure if 'jason''s dismissal of the circus is dixon using an unreliable narrator, or if dixon actually believes that

god i hate this art so much

how dare u insult the teen titans in any way 😤 i like the name

also titans cameo!!

more awful jason characterisation (pls dixon just stay 8732894738 feet away from jason)

"without robin i have no family" i guess the titans are just chopped liver huh

"i always thought that one day i'd be batman" nope nope nope nope you have 0 understanding of dick's character if that's what you think mr dixon

i love clark having a part in dick becoming nightwing - i adore it - but the way dixon retcons the importance of the titans, and especially kory, in dick becoming nightwing rubs me the complete wrong way. i'm choosing to read this as a between the scenes moment, but i 100% dixon intended this to replace the titans' importance. and the way ppl just swallow it up w/o thinking about the reasons behind why dixon would want to erase the titans - and kory - pisses me off lmao

"i didn't mean to stay so long [with the titans]" *eternal screaming* he really wants to undermine the titans at every possible turn wow

at least the next page acknowledges the importance of kory in dick's life, but right afterwards we have "lmao she must've liked your costume. all the girls did. you're a chick magnet" (paraphrased) and i'm just back to sighing

also hi i'm mad at the framing of babs being the endgame bc of course they'd do that. and also at kory being shorter than dick. thanks! i hate it! i'm willing to bet that dixon asked for that specifically.

"this is where i came in" i'm confused at this part but tbh i don't care enough to think abt it any more

i'm also ughhhh at the way they're trying to give bludhaven importance. i don't care, i don't like it, he should've never moved there

ok i do really like that last page

the fact files things are good enough, i love the art for the haly's circus one! the pt barnum ref is 😬 though (ik ik it's the 90s but fjskdh why)

lost pages: teen titans-

ok so, i don't like devin grayson. i don't like her writing at all, i don't think she gets the characters at all, and hot take: if you dislike a character who's super important part of dick's life, and helped him come into his own and be who he is, you shouldn't be writing that character. (i'm talking about kory here, but tbh if you dislike any of the characters who dick interacts with frequently and are a huge part of his life - especially his love interests, and his family - you shouldn't be writing dick.) so i'm not going into this story with high hopes. however i've seen ppl talk about this story as being really good so i hope i'll like it too

you can tell she mostly cares about the fab five, which wouldn't be a problem if she treated the ntt characters better but alas ://

kory and vic both say 1 thing the entire page lmao

ALSO KORY NOT KNOWING WHAT DAY IT IS IS ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT I CANNOT BELIEVE

i loooove the parallel between dick grasping wally's hand and young!dick holding his dad's hand 🥺🥺🥺🥺

vic legit says one thing the entire story lmaoooooooo 🙃🙃🙃

i love garth and roy being brought to the tower 🥺

this is def some of grayson's better work, but it suffers from the same thing all of her stories do. she doesn't fully understand all the characters. if one character is off it affects the whole story. a lot of her stories have good ideas and poor execution, and this one definitely doesn't have awful execution but there's still something missing and as someone who loves the titans it's just sad. i get why people like this story - it made me tear up at the end ngl - but the rest of the titans are just as important as dick and it feels like the writer doesn't understand that. (i get this is a dick comic but it's still a titans story.) (it does however make me want to write a fic expanding upon this moment and the aftermath bc the idea of the titans all coming together to cheer dick up is so goooooood. are they gonna have a party celebrating dick's parent's lives? are they gonna eat junk food and watch a comfort movie? are they gonna just sit and talk?? the possibilities are endless!!)

the art is gorgeous as all of jimenez' art is, i love his style so freaking much!!

the next page is of the bludhaven supporting cast and all it does is remind me how much i do not care abt them. i think the only one i actually like is clancy, the others are expendable and forgettable. (i do love clancy a lot though, i wish she'd been written by more people than just dixon). though, i usually love guice's art, i think i actually prefer mcdaniel's take on clancy??? which is 100% a first for me.

i like seeing the set up to dick's apartment, bc i'm a sucker for layouts and maps. i wish this comic was way better written bc the concept of dick living in an apartment building and interacting with his neighbours is one i really like, esp in superhero comics. but again i have to say, alas.

a day in the life of nite-wing/hangin'-with tad:

painful... just painful...

i physically couldn't care less about this if you paid me

the next page is tad's file and i am Not Reading That. nope nope nope. and also fuck you.

next is a map of bludhaven, and like i said, i'm a sucker for maps.

the page after that is brutale's file and again i just do not care. the art is by damion scott who i really like, but the design looks like knock off scarecrow so

the next pages are files for double dare, lady vidc, shrike and blockbuster and i'm skipping them all bc i give negative fucks

next is a spread of what i assume is dick's cork-board? it looks kinda interesting but the writing is hard to make out and i don't care enough to try to decipher it

next is torque's files and same same, idc idc

nightwing's romances/orange you glad i didn't say banana?:

ok so y'all know i hate dickbabs. i hate everything about how it was built on the foundation of tearing down kory and dickkory and i'm a kory fan first and foremost so i hate this whole situation. so i'm already predisposed to disliking anything that talks about how babs is dick's true love, and talks down any of his other love interests. i come into this with an admitted bias. i'd try to be charitable but i don't see why i should when no one involved in the writing of dickbabs is charitable towards my faves so 🤷

i love love love stelfreeze's art! he's drawn babs in something else i read and i loved it then and i love it here!

i adore dick and babs' friendship, so the beginning is really sweet and cute. i also love the concept of baby!dickie being obsessed with watermelons and wanting to eat them forever

dewey decimal system!!! librarian babs reference!! fdjkh she's such a nerd i love it

babs trying to talk about romance and dick's like 'lol nah what abt fighting' lmao

i Do Not like babs hitting dick while talking abt 'i was segueing into talking about romance, hint hint'

this is romance? dick giving exactly 0 fucks?

why are these writers obsessed with hinting at dick and donna??? like first dixon and now grayson??? please stop!!!! i do love how he says he loves her bc 🥺🥺🥺 i love them

ur not being slick having babs call donna 'donna' and kory 'starfire', i see you grayson. i see ur hate for kory.

and reducing kory to just her body, and dick's sexual attraction to her boils my blood

i'm choosing to interpret babs's face in that panel as her being attracted to kory too

i do like that dick talks about being in love with kory, and thinking about still being with her. a) i'll take those crumbs, and b) thats how i see dick's relationship to love as being (though devin views him as kinda flighty and unfaithful so idk how we're agreeing on this lmao)

pls stop talking shit abt huntress devin, ur the one who made dick/hel a thing

since devin loves her brudick subtext, i'm side-eyeing the mention of bruce there

also why are we hinting at cass pls stop

babs being jealous and petty pls stop

the ending was smooth i have to admit it. if it was any other ship i'd probs love it but as it is, i'm tired of everyone else being downplayed in favour of the ~babs is dick's true loooooveee, it's always been herrrrr, from the beginningggggg~

i don't mind babs being dick's first crush though, in fact that's my hc for him because hello?? who wouldn't have a crush on babs??

thank you mr stelfreeze for accurately portraying babs' bitchface bc she's being a petty bitch here (and i love her but lmaooo i hate this whole thing)

next is the files on the bludhaven pd and i do not caaaare

then there's a timeline, but i don't care about any timeline that dixon writes. i'm petty though so i'm gonna read it and talk abt why i don't like the retcons.

i hate the dickbabs reference in YEAR FUCKING 3 jfc. pls stop with the retcons.

also lmao the difference between the way dick's canon relationship from that time is described in the shittiest way possible (though reluctant at first, dick begins a long and tumultuous romance with teammate starfire.) and how he wrote dick and babs' relationship (robin first teams with ... barbara in her guise as batgirl. the two will pair time and again over the course of their careers and develop a burgeoning affection for one another) this was at a time when they weren't even remotely interested in each other!!! there was no affections there dixon! no matter how much you wish it to be true!! and again the contrast with 'starfire' and 'barbara'! like it's dehumanising and i hate it.

and he can't even bother to get the new teen titans' team name right.

no mention of kory's importance in dick becoming nightwing, nope we ignore that bc it's thanks to superman now.

stepping away from the way he hates kory to talk about the way he hates jason! jason's described as a 'troubled orphan' and a 'juvenile delinquent'.

no mentions of how jason and dick bonded but as soon as tim gets introduced he talks about how dick and tim 'switfly bond as brothers'.

another incredibly impersonal description of dick and kory's relationship (the wedding of dick grayson and kory anders (aka starfire) is aborted by the rogue titan raven. dick and kory soon part company and dissolve their relationship.) but at least he calls her kory this time.

also i love how he speeds up through all the 'non important' development for dick but spends a whole page talking about all the bullshit he's been writing for nightwing. i understand why, but it's just lmaooooo 🙃 when you read it like that, it really shows how shitty this comic is.

talks of the 'doomed relationship' between dick and hel and i really hate it pls stop

the last page is dick's evaluation by the police academy and i do not care so i'm skipping it too.

[dollettemilia]

Day 001|Shitty baby here˚₊✩･🥡༉˚🗯*:･.

You might see this on your feed or some other way and wonder “who’s this fucking weirdo?” Well I am here to introduce myself as Nova. Also no, I won’t be saying my gender or sex so don’t even think of asking what’s in my pants. Now that’s out of the way, here is why I’m making this account:

I am slowly losing my will to live everyday and losing friends while I’m at it. Hopefully I meet some other depressing people here who can give me a crumb of seratonin

I suffer from depression and an eating disorder so hopefully I can relate to some of you through my shitty blogs

After failed attempts of connecting through discord, irl, etc. Tumblr is my last shot

I’m not sure whether I want to recover or get worse so hopefully you guys help me know

This account is to also keep track of my self harm. I’ll try my best not be triggering but if you can’t already tell this account kinda is already

Now that’s out of the way, here are some facts about the dirty person writing this:

I quit therapy after being outed to my parents about my eating disorder

I threw away my antidepressants

I’m bisexual I think, or confused

I’m a gender less garbage baby

I have an ENTJ-A personality and Pisces

I want to write books if I live longer than I expect or go into criminal justice (I’m still ACAB don’t worry)

My mother is enabling of my abusive father and abusive brother

I have a porn addiction but I swear I’m not some fucking incel

My favorite manhwas are suicide boy and BJ Alex (yea I’m into that kinky shit keke jk)

I’m weirdly enough a Catholic (fuck I should just pray my problems away)

I like anime and reading

I’ve been bullied for my weight growing up

I was sexually assaulted by my ex boyfriend (I hate men <3)

I like to write and draw OC

I’m 100% sure I already found my soulmate

I don’t expect to live past 22 tbh

I’m a lonely piece of shit...who wouldn’t mind some tumblr mutuals

So anyways I’ll be tracking my days through my blogs. I might track calories , self harm, suicidal thoughts, lmao maybe even happy stuff if such happen. So who knows if I kill myself, get off tumblr, recover, or get abducted by aliens. So follow me to find out what crazy fucking shit happens to me. Just know I won’t ever post pictures of myself or where I live or any of my irl “normal” social media’s. This will be my vent place and I don’t need more of school finding out I’m weirder than before.

Try to respect this depressing shit ˚₊✩･🥡༉˚🗯*:･.Thannk you!

My DMs are open for mutuals, cash, or other shit. So I’ll end this post off with Lee Hoon (Depressing Protagonist of Sucide Boy). Have a good day you piss babies and please go take a shower (I can smell you through the screen keke)!

—>KillingNovaSoftly has left the blog

[quietlysatan]

First Comes Marriage -  Faylette, AO3

Link: Here!!

Rating: Explicit in The Most Endearing way I have EVER read, and I’ve got over 1000+ bookmarks on AO3 (god only knows how many are actually in my history)

Favorite Quote(s): They do this every five seconds for the rest of the fic. I’m BARELY exaggerating, it’s adorable. 

He took her against his chest, wrapping her in his arms, holding her close. A small gasp escaped her before she fell silent, standing still in his embrace. His hand pressed firmly against her back, feeling the cotton of her tunic, and the wrinkles of whatever fabric lay beneath. But something about the texture of her clothes, about the heat that he felt even through all his layers, about her unsteady breath against his neck — all these minuscule details, so easy to perceive — gave him pause. It became apparent why, despite everything else, his dream lacked its usual haziness and vagueness.

I love him so much, and this is partially why

“Right. I can come to bed with you now, if you wish.” His eyes widened at the sound of his own voice saying those words. “I mean, I can come to sleep with you. No, wait, not with you, just… near you, I suppose. A-And literally sleeping, of course, not…” He shook his head and groaned, mentally punching himself in the stomach to make himself shut up. “Let’s go, then.”

They are both absolutely this stupid in real life, I can almost guarantee it.

“Shouldn’t you at least take off your armour?”

Oh, Andraste’s tits.

“N-No, I… prefer to sleep this way.” Was it really worth his pride to remain so obstinate in front of her? “Old habit.”

Cullen no

“Inquisitor, you look…” What is the word, within the confines of language, that perfectly expresses what he saw before his eyes? Beautiful? Radiant? Breath-taking?

“I look…?” she mirrored his words, prompting him to finish.

“Uncomfortable.”

That probably wasn’t the right one. Josephine looked like she was using every ounce of her willpower not to roll her eyes at his gaffe.

I hate this hoe, but damn does she have great terrible timing

“She does not satisfy you in bed, does she?”

And then he choked and spewed crumbs all over himself.

I wouldn’t be surprised if he actually did this in the game tbh

“So, how is she?”

Considering the question made him call Evelyn’s image to mind. With all the time he spent with her, day after day, night after night, recalling almost perfectly her face and her voice and even the way her clothes felt against his fingertips was an effortless task. “She is… strong, indomitable, determined. Wouldn’t let anything stop her from something she’s committed to. Extraordinary with a blade in hand. Firm in her leadership, but not obstinate.” He thought of that smile she gives him when he kisses her, bright and authentic, and how he reflexively returns it just at the sight of her happiness. He didn’t realize that the mere thought of it curved up the corner of his lips. “Inspires all those who follow her.”

“High praise from the Commander,” Bull commented. “But I guess I wasn’t specific enough. How’s the sex?”

This’ll come in handy later

“And Cullen,” said Bull, demanding his full attention before imparting his own advice. “You know those really friendly pups you have here that would just lick your face like crazy forever if you didn’t stop them?”

A part of his mind convinced him that he was going to advise getting Evelyn a puppy for some reason, and that was the part of his mind that impelled him to say, “Yes?”

“Do that yourself. But between her legs.”

He’s so fucking earnest how could you Not love this man???

She managed to hold that look for a moment longer, but upon opening her mouth to say something, she instantly cracked up into a flurry of laughs. Instead of relieving her of the need to laugh at the absurdity of the whole situation, doing so only made it harder to stop, and she just kept going even until her eyes were watering and her cheeks hurt from the childish grin on her face.

“Are… are you all right?” Cullen eventually asked, and he did actually sound genuinely concerned as he said that. In light of that, Evelyn tried to calm herself down. Her success was arguable.

“I-I’m sorry,” she paused to stifle a chuckle before it turns into a howl. “That’s just… it’s such a mean prank to pull on you, but—“ She wanted to tell him it was just too funny, but her ability to speak was taken away once again as she tried to hold her drumming abdomen still with her arms. That might have spoken for her, though.

“It was a prank?” She could not see her since her eyes are scrunched closed, but his voice revealed the incredulity that would be painted across his features.

“I’m sure of it. Sera was probably in on it too, somehow.”

*Snort*

“As you were,” Evelyn ordered, her voice just steady enough to have it come off an as order.

“Sure thing, boss,” said Bull. He still watched them with an intent curiosity, though. “Can I ask only one–“

“Absolutely not.”

“Just an author's curiosity–“

“No, Varric.”

Take this as you will

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydrtF45-y-g

Rating change incoming. ;D

I love an author that calls out the weird sexism thing we here in the media, and probably would’ve heard significantly more back then... but also, they’re just, so fucking gentle with each other, and it fucking shows fam

“Then, and I remember this all so well, she says: ‘Evelyn, imagine you’re holding a platter, and atop it is a Feastday pheasant with all the trimmings, as perfect as any Feastday pheasant you’ve ever seen. You have to carry it through the whole of the estate, but you are being careless. Before you leave the kitchen, the cook takes a bite. Then, along the way, the stable boy takes a bite. A guard takes a bite. A page boy takes a bite. A visiting trader takes a bite. The keeper of the hounds takes a bite. The blacksmith and his apprentice take bites from it.

“And finally, you reach the dining room, and place the bones of that perfect pheasant on the table, in front of your husband.’” Her lips pursed, and she was taken aback by how much they had to struggle to continue giving voice to her words. “‘And you will have disgraced him, and us.’”

“That's...” Cullen faltered.

“And I just don't think it can be like that, like it takes part of you away, like it destroys you. It doesn't sound right at all.” Evelyn huffed through her nose, stifling a laugh at the notion, but still feeling its claws grip at her chest, making her exhalation shaky. “But then, sometimes, I think maybe I am just that bird on that platter.”

“You're not.” He told her firmly, as insistent as she'd ever heard him say anything. “You're not,” he repeated, softly.

They’re so wonderfully in love with each other

“You have so many freckles,” he commented, tracing his fingers back up her arms, coming to rest his palms on the sides of her well-speckled shoulders.

“Thank you.” She winced shortly after saying so. It wasn't a compliment, was it?

“I want to kiss every single one,” Cullen told her,

So awkward and wonderful and sweet and well-intentioned they are.

“Do you really put this on every day?” he asked, as if thinking aloud. “I-I'm sorry, I don't know if I'm supposed to speak, or stay quiet or what to say...”

“It's fine, really.” She was trying to reassure herself as much as him, because she hadn't the slightest idea either. “And yes. Everyday.” She paused. “Always feels great to take it off, at least.”

;) ;) ;)

“Hmm.” She scrunched up her face in thought, then meandered through them in speech. “Well, there's no lavender-scented candles, or sparkling Orlesian wine, or rose petals on the bed... or a bed, I suppose. And maybe what happened was different from what I expected.” Reaching out one hand, she ran the backs of her fingers softly along his strong, stubbled jaw. “But the man is precisely how I've imagined him.”

Important lesson kids!!! You are NOT obligated to swallow anything, no matter what media, fanfiction, or even your partner tells you!!! And anyone worth your time won’t Make you do it anyway

“I don’t understand. What are you sorry for?”

“I couldn’t swallow, it felt like it was getting stuck in the back of my mouth every time I tried.”

Cullen raised a brow. “I… didn’t even think you would plan on doing that.”

She raised a brow in turn. “Really?” He nodded. “Huh. It’s what the women in the books always do,” she added timidly.

They’re just genuinely like this and I love how real and honest it feels

“I suppose everything’s all at the ready, then.” At the ready? Was she a squadron about to assault an enemy? Was he trying to sound completely out of his element?

“Sure is,” said Evelyn. “Well, have fun.” A second later, she slapped her hand over her eyes. “I have no idea why I said that.”

“No, I’m sure I will,” he said, as if trying to console her, and somehow becoming convinced that he had to keep going in such an attempt. “I very much enjoy being with you, so I’m sure I’ll enjoy… doing this to… your, ah.” He cleared his throat. “Well.” At that point, he no longer had any desire to stall, because he was certain that his mouth would be better occupied doing absolutely anything besides talking.

CONTINUITY!!!! Something the writers of Teen Wolf have never heard of and I’m STILL salty about it yes

Evelyn was about to head out of the room, and had even begun to argue with herself if she should pretend she hadn’t seen it so he could surprise her with it, when her eyes caught a final part of the room that had not been there before. On the pillow, there was a letter, neatly folded, with her name written on it. She picked it up, unfurled it, and read:

Evelyn,

I know these are not substitutes for the lavender candles, sparkling wine and roses you would have wanted, but I was hoping they would please you all the same. Unfortunately, I will not be able to find out if they will.

saving hte best for last This is what happens when you try to steal a happily married man without his consent kids, just fyi

She wrapped her arms around his neck, sliding her impeccably shaped nails up and through his golden curls. “You don’t know how you’ve made me burn for you.”

“Graciela…”

How pleased she looked to not have to correct him anymore. “Sí, amor?”

“Your hair’s on fire.”

Words & Chapter(s): 67,940 words, and 29 chapters, unfinished and last updated in 2016, but still worth it and we don’t get left on an awkward cliff hanger either

Summary: Inquisitor Trevelyan tries negotiating with nobles while her trusty diplomat is out sick, and accidentally arranges her marriage to a nobleman's son. In a moment of desperation and shortsightedness, she claims to already has a husband: Cullen. It's up to the few who know the truth to sort everything out, but until then, the two are forced to keep up the charade of wedded bliss.

A fill for: http://dragonage-kink.livejournal.com/12449.html?thread=48474273#t48474273

Score: 11

Pairing(s): Cullen Rutherford/Female Trevelyan, I choose to believe she’s a rouge but it’s not very certain what her class is.

Warning(s): Graciela keeps trying unsuccessfully to get Cullen to cheat, there’s lemon and it great because it’s so awkward and endearing and honestly I love it, especially since a lot of straight romance, even in fanfiction, is weirdly directed towards Men rather than both partners

Pros: THE SEX!!!! It’s so sweet and earnest and hot and wonderful and my favorite part of this fic is their entire courting thing, from awkward start to satisfying finish, it’s sooooo good!!!!!!!!

I love the other characters too, even Graciela, as much as I hate her, her written character is fascinating and intriguing and UUUUUUUUUGH I love every written here, they all have such HUGE personalities so easily written into the fic that’s it’s almost unbelievable, the way that  Faylette has managed to establish, with ease, who everyone is, what their motivations are, their goals etc, it’s amazing honestly.

Also, the physical description is red hair/green eyes/freckles and that’s all I've noticed so feel free to imagine her as any skin tone you want, much like I always do anyways

Gif Aesthetic: Kinda like this video

But also

[la-paritalienne]

getting to know me

thank youuuu @homosociallyyours for tagging me and sorry it took me a while! i’ve probably done this before but to quote you, ‘these dumb things are my fave bc I’m basic af’ so i’m very happy to do it ✨✨

Nickname: eve

Zodiac: sag sun / aries moon / pisces rising 

Height: 155 cm

Last movie I saw: avengers infinity war, but if we’re talking films that i hadn’t seen before, it was a french one about a wedding planner, i think ‘c’est la vie’ but i could be wrong about the title

Last thing I googled: jennifer’s body

Favorite musicians: too many and too random to properly list, but lana del rey, florence + the machine, pink floyd, mø, tove lo, aya nakamura, oasis, fabri fibra... etc

Song stuck in my head: shedontknowbutsheknows

Other blogs: not really. like i have a couple but all of my interests are here so i don’t use them anymore

Do I get asks: not tons of them, but yes! 

Following: 709

Amount of sleep: between 6 and 8 hours normally 

Lucky number: 7

What I’m wearing: pj pants, a bra and layered gold necklaces

Dream job:  MEG I HAVE TO QUOTE YOU AGAIN: ‘rn it’s being paid to exist. if i could make enough money to live just by being alive, it would take away a huge strain from my life’. so yeah. lawyer / fashion / mixing up the two / miranda priestly etc and all that but tbh i don’t think a specific job has to be the center of someone’s ambition. like your goal, if you even have one, can be a certain place, a lifestyle... somewhere you wanna be someday. or not even that. maybe you just want to grow up and be happy and of course a job is a way to financial stability and it’s important but it’s a means to an end, nothing more, so i’m not focusing all of my energies (any of them, tbh) on that specifically 

Dream trip: japan 

Favorite food: sushi and thai 

Play any instruments: nah i’m shit at it

Languages: italian, french and english. i wanna learn arabic, i think i’ll start at some point in 2019

Favorite songs: wish you were here by pink floyd, hey you got drugs by tove lo, basically any song from mø’s album ‘no mythologies to follow’, slide away by oasis, what the water gave me by florence + the machine, 

Random fact: i actually found out yesterday that the mom of the kids i babysit knows bella hadid? like she knows the whole family through one of her best friends who’s bella’s and gigi’s cousin, but apparently gigi is rarely there at family stuff, while bella sometimes is. ...random

Random fact about me? it took me like two weeks finishing this bc i was on holiday at home and i would find the time to reply one or two questions and then save it in my drafts where it sat until now (i had replied up to the ‘random fact’ question)

Describe yourself as aesthetic things: stray pieces of glitter sticking to random parts of your body after a party, red corals found in a drawer in a summer house, a delicate gold chain w rainbow crystal pendants, fenty’s trophy wife highlighter, the feeling of satisfaction when you’re sweated out and breathless after a tough workout, paris by the river when it’s grey and drizzling, paris by the river when it’s summer and the sun sets at 11pm, vintage porcelain stacked in the kitchen sink, the colorful crumbs and remains on a plate after a dessert splurge, waking up at 6am to study and still make the most of your day after, laughing until you cry on a friend’s bed, a collection of vintage designer bags, pink & gold everything

and i tag:

@solounabarca, @kissing-fish, @lanadelreya, @lana-del-creys, @itsastorm, @wandererharry, @greenandbluebubblegum, @hollerade, @lladolcediva, @t-ranquillement, @caroussell, @whatyoushare if you feel like it of course 

♡♡

[msgenevieve447]

Muddle Through Somehow - 1/1

Pairing: Captain Swan - Season 7 adjacent Canon CS Holiday Fic!

Rating:  M

Summary:  She always knew Henry would leave home one day. She just didn’t think he’d leave home for another realm, okay? (Starring Emma Swan and Killian Jones, featuring cameos by Henry, Snow and Charming, mention of Regina and others.)

Notes:  This is probably the schmoopiest Christmas fic I’ve ever written.  Completely and utterly self-indulgent, TBH.  It starts off during 702 but then continues with the Storybrooke timeline and our Captain Swan, completely ignoring the hodge-podge of a timeline created in Season 7, because that makes no sense whatsoever as far as I’m concerned.  Your mileage may vary, of course. LOL.

P.S. THERE BE MENTIONS OF CANON BABIES IN THIS FIC.  

PPS. Merry Christmas to those who celebrate, my lovely shipmates. 

~*~

Someday soon we all will be together If the fates allow Until then, we’ll have to muddle through somehow So have yourself a merry little Christmas now

 ~*~

Henry leaves Storybrooke on a sunny October morning, the week after Emma’s birthday, two weeks before Halloween.  

Emma bites back the urge to ask him to wait until after Halloween, until after Thanksgiving, until after Christmas.  Maybe even wait until she doesn’t look at him and see that little ten year-old standing on her ratty welcome mat outside her Boston apartment, looking up at her with hope brimming in his eyes.

God, she’s going to miss him.

He politely shuns his grandmother’s best efforts to throw him a going-away party, telling them he doesn’t want to make a fuss, or worse, tempt the fates by having a happy celebration at Granny’s.

Emma has to admit, the kid has a point.  

He’s not a kid anymore, though. He’s now officially an adult, and that’s kind of the problem.

Problem?  No, not a problem, she tells herself, as though if she says it enough times, she might actually believe it.  She understands why he wants to leave, she does.  That doesn’t mean she has to be happy about it, though.

But he’s gotten enough grief about his travel plans from Regina, so Emma just keeps smiling until her lips feel like they’re starting to fray around the edges, matching the tiny threads that are peeling loose around her heart.  

Henry makes the rounds of the town in the week before his departure, and Emma can’t help feeling proud at the effort he’s putting into making his farewells.  By the end of the week, she’s pretty sure he’s consumed his body weight in pizza and soda in the pursuit of spending some quality time with Archie, Granny and the rest of the usual suspects, to steal a line from one of his favourite movies.

In between the pizza fests, he manages to squeeze in a few last motorcycle safety lessons with August, honing his skill to the point where Regina had finally managed to stop watching him through white-knuckled hands.

(This last development? Not exactly Killian’s favourite thing, much to Emma’s eternal amusement.)

Last night, he’d had dinner with his grandparents and his toddler uncle (and Wilby, she assumes, lying in wait for any dropped crumbs as usual). This morning it was their turn, a late breakfast involving way too much food.  The three of them will be eating leftovers for days.

No, wait. Not three. Her breath snags in her throat.  The two of them.

Damn it. This is going to be harder than she thought.

Henry’s been packed for a month, she knows, but she can’t help herself.  “You’ve got Killian’s magic message-in-a-bottle-thingy?”

Her son and husband exchange a knowing look over the kitchen table that makes her want to laugh and weep in the same heartbeat.  “Sure do.” Henry grins at her, and there’s the ten year-old kid again.  “It was the first thing I packed.”

They linger over breakfast, but Emma knows she’s just delaying the inevitable, and as much as she might like, she can’t wish for the clock to stop ticking.  Finally, it’s time for him to head to Regina’s for one last lunch together and feeling like a child dragging its heels, she follows Henry and Killian to the front door, watching in silence as her husband helps her son don his backpack.  

“Enjoy your adventures, mate. Take care of yourself.” Killian gathers her son in his arms, a bracing hug with more than a little back-slapping.  

“I will.” Henry’s reply is muffled against Killian’s shoulder, making him sound much younger than his years, and Emma’s fingernails curl into the swell of her palms.  “You’ll look after everyone while I’m gone, right?”

“Aye, you can count on it.” Killian’s eyes are suspiciously bright as he takes a half step back, almost fumbling as he retrieves a small box from the sideboard and presses it into Henry’s hand. “A little something for the journey, my lad.”

Emma never thought the sight of a box of Pop Tarts could make her cry, but that was her old life. In the here and now, she manages to see that they’re S’mores flavour – Henry’s favourite – before her eyes blur hotly with tears.  “Really?”

Killian’s arm tightens around her shoulders, and Henry quickly takes her hand in his.  “I’ll be home again before you know it.���

Blinking back her tears, she squeezes his hand.  “I’m fine, really.”  She’s not fine, but that’s not Henry’s burden to bear.  He might be almost as tall as her these days, but it’s still her job to keep his heart safe. “Do you need a ride to Regina’s?”

Her son’s grin is unabashedly proud as he lets go of her hand to smooth his fingertips down the front of his new leather jacket. “My bike’s outside.”

“Right, of course.”  

Then Killian is opening the front door, letting in the cool Autumn air, and she has to gulp down the sudden knot in her throat.  “I love you, kid.”

I’m Henry. I’m your son.

The hug Henry gives her is tight enough to make her ribs creak, and she never wants it to end. “Love you too, Mom.”  

He extracts himself from her arms with typical teenaged awkwardness, making her heart lurch, but Killian’s hand is warm at the small of her back, holding her steady. “Your grandmother may never forgive you for depriving her of organising a farewell party for you, you know.”

“I know.”  Henry looks faintly embarrassed. “I just wanted to say my goodbyes without everyone watching.”

A dark memory flashes through her thoughts at her son’s choice of words. Beside her, she feels Killian stiffen, but his reply is cheery enough.  “Perfectly understandable.”

The next few minutes are a blur, another hug, another kiss on her cheek (God, her little boy has stubble on his chin, when the Hell did that happen?), another handshake for Killian. And then he’s roaring up the street on his second-hand bike, his new black helmet gleaming in the sunlight, and Emma knows he’s taken a piece of her heart with him.

(Not literally, thank God. Sometimes she forgets how often that actually happens around here.)  

They linger in the doorway until he disappears from view, and Emma’s sigh feels like it’s been dredged up from the soles of her feet.  

“Interesting turn of phrase.” Behind her, Killian lets out a soft breath, his hand coming up to rest on her hip.  “Did you tell him of our farewell in the Underworld?”

His tone is light, almost playful, but the weight of memory behind it has her turning to face him. “No, never.” She buries her face in the curve on his neck, inhaling the clean tang of him as she wraps her arms around his waist.  “Maybe it’s in his book?”

“That bloody book.”  She feels the curve of his smile against her temple.  “Is nothing sacred?”

She tries to laugh, but it comes out as a stuttering sob. “Come on, love.”  His lips are warm against her skin, his hand trailing down her arm to entwine his fingers through hers.  “Let’s sail away.”

Leaving the breakfast dishes in their wake, he leads her back to their bedroom, and in the sunlight strewn tangle of sheets, she lets him chase away the sadness from her thoughts with the heat of his kiss and the silken brush of his skin against hers.  

(They leave the condoms in the top drawer, just as they have every time they’ve - well, you know - for the last year.)

When they fall, breathless and giddy with pleasure, they fall together, his fingers still tightly wound through hers, the pounding of his heart fluttering against her own chest. Closing her eyes, she presses her forehead against his, her free hand slipping unbidden to rest on her belly.  Maybe this time, maybe not.  If it doesn’t happen, Henry will always be enough.  She and Killian will be enough.

That doesn’t mean she can’t hope for more.

“Good thing I didn’t bother making the bed,” she eventually quips as she rolls onto her side, and he laughs, pressing a smacking kiss to her bare shoulder.

“Well, we now officially have the house to ourselves, Swan.”  She turns her head just in time to see him wriggle those ridiculous eyebrows of his, his gaze sweeping hotly over her from head to toe.  “We may never make the bed again.”

They do, of course, because he’s a stickler for keeping their cabin shipshape.

Besides, there’s always the couch.

~*~

Halloween comes and goes without much fanfare, at least in their home.  While his Swan is a lifelong devotee of candy, it seems she can’t muster the energy to enjoy the festivities with her young man gone.  

When they’re not dodging national holidays, they go about the business of settling into normality, enjoying the novelty of married life and all the highs and lows that come with it. He would be exquisitely happy if it weren’t for the fact that he can literally see the sadness chipping away at the woman he loves.

He does his best to make up for Henry’s absence.  Some days, he thinks he almost succeeds.  Other days, when he finds her wiping away surreptitious tears she doesn’t want him to see, he knows he’s failed her.

The very real fear that he is not enough sends a chill through his heart far too often, but he is a patient man, and he knows his Swan. She is strong.  She will get through this.

When Thanksgiving arrives (yet another gluttonous occasion) a month later, he doesn’t have much more luck raising her spirits.  Thankfully, her parents are all too happy to fill the gaps in conversation at the late luncheon they host at their farmhouse.  

(They’d all already indulged in a sumptuous brunch with Regina, Zelena and young Robyn at the Mayor’s mansion, and Killian is quite sure he never needs to eat another candied anything in his lifetime.)

After the meal is done, Emma and her father take the young prince for a stroll around the vast garden behind the house.  Killian, knowing the best way to his mother-in-law’s heart, insists on helping with the dishes.  

“David’s normally the one who does the dishes,” she informs him with the lofty air of a warrior princess, trying and failing to hide her smile. “I suppose you’ll do, though.”

They work well together, and they spend a pleasant ten minutes discussing harmless town gossip while the pile of dishes grows smaller and smaller.  Eventually, though, her hands grow still, and he follows the line of her gaze through the kitchen window to where her family is engaged in an energetic game of fetch with the dog.  “Emma looked a little sad at lunch.”

“Aye.”  He tightens his grip on one of the ornate whiskey glasses that look as though they date from the Enchanted Forest. “She misses the lad, and nothing I do seems to help.”  

“I’m sure you help a lot. It’s just a worried parent thing.” Snow flicks him a knowing smile as she plunges her gloved hands back into the soapy water. “You’ll be one yourself one day.” She bites her lip, then hastens on, “Not that you haven’t been an amazing stepfather to Henry-”

“It’s fine, love. No offense taken.”  

Snow hands him one of young Neal’s dinner plates, and he can’t help smiling at the coloured bunnies that adorn it. “You miss him too, I’m sure, just as Charming and I do.”

“That I do.”  There is definitely a Henry-shaped hole in his life, but he’s hardly one to complain about a young lad wishing to seek his own story in the world.  

“As for being a parent myself one day, I’m not too sure of that.” He finds himself thinking of the monthly ritual that always begins with hope and always ends with disappointment.  Twelve months in a row, and nary a sign that they might be blessed with an addition to their family.  “It’s been a year now and we haven’t-”

He breaks off, but it’s too late.  Snow’s green eyes are already wide with sparkling delight. “You and Emma are trying to have a baby?”  

His mother-in-law has the sense to whisper, but he’s still kicking himself for speaking so freely. He tries one of his best leers on for size, hoping to distract her. “Frequently.”

The toe of her small booted foot finds his ankle with a pointed jab.  “You can cut out the sleazy pirate act, you know we don’t buy it anymore.”

Damn it.

She’s still watching him with those bright green eyes, eyes that always see far too much, just like her daughter. “Yes, we’re trying.”

He can actually feel the excitement humming through her, and he bumps her shoulder gently with his. “Please wait until Emma tells you herself?”

Snow draws herself up to her full height, her pink-rubber hands laden with suds, and fixes him with a haughty stare. “Are you implying I can’t keep a secret?”

He’s not sure who starts laughing first, but they’re still laughing when Emma and David make their way back to the house, young Neal perched high on his father’s shoulders, the canine at their heels.  Pausing in her massaging of the dog’s ridiculously fuzzy ears, Emma looks from Killian to her mother, then back again. “What’s so funny?”

“Granny’s giblet patties.”

“Food babies.”  The room seems to grow still at the word babies, and Snow presses her lips together for the second time in as many minutes.  “Damn it.”

The look Emma tosses at him is one of pure exasperation as David’s head swivels, to look first at his daughter, then at Killian. He carefully manoeuvres young Neal down from his shoulders to balance him on one hip, hopeful anticipation etched on his face. “You’re not-”

Killian’s gaze locks with Emma’s, his heart lifting when her expression softens.  “No, I’m not pregnant.”  Reaching out, she takes her little brother from their father’s arms, burying her nose in the tangle of curls Killian knows smells of sunshine and soap.  “But we’re trying.”

“And that’s where the too much information begins.” David is suddenly at Killian’s side, grinning as he relieves him of the dishcloth draped over his shoulder. “Why don’t you practice your fatherly charms on my son for an hour or so while the ladies relax?”

“With pleasure.” Killian clicks his heels together. “Dad.”

David winces, and Killian’s not entirely sure it’s 100% teasing. “Still getting used to that.”

Much later that night, Emma stretches out beside him, one leg hooked over his, her hand coming up to give his stomach a gentle poke.  “Food baby?”

“I’m afraid so, love.” He didn’t think it was possible for a human being to ingest so much food, but every holiday season in this realm seems to prove him wrong. “Perhaps you should regale me with more tales of my Wish self to ensure I keep myself in good health.”

Emma laughs softly, tangling her fingers through the silver charms on his chest. “I’ll help you work off those extra calories, I promise.”  She pokes him in the stomach again, grinning as he groans.  “Not tonight, though.”

“Definitely not.” Rolling onto his side, he gathers her into his arms, relishing the feel of her bare skin against his from chest to knee.  There’s a lot of be said for having total privacy in one’s own home, not to mention being married to a woman who can cast a heating charm with the flick of her slender fingers.  “One of the joys of married life surely must be knowing the other person will be there beside you when the sun rises.”

“Unless there’s another curse, of course,” she mumbles sleepily against his shoulder, and he slides his hand down the supple length of her back to bestow a light pinch on the curve of her arse.

“Hush, Swan.”  She snorts daintily, but burrows closer all the same. “Today is the day for being thankful, not tempting fate.”

Lifting her head, she puts a soft hand on his cheek, her gaze burning into his in the darkened room. “No matter how much I miss Henry, never think that I’m not thankful for you. Not just today. Every day.”

“And I you.”  Her mouth tastes of toothpaste and the faintest trace of strawberry lip gloss, and the throaty moan that rumbles from her chest to his as he flicks his tongue against hers is almost his undoing.   Thankfully, given he’s quite sure his performance would be decidedly subpar, her next kiss is soft and sweet and speaks to him of slumber.

“See you when the sun rises, sailor.”

“Aye aye, captain.” He rolls onto his back, closes his eyes as she settles into her favourite sleeping position stretched out beside, her hand over his heart.  “It’s a date.”

~*~ 

 Less than four scant weeks later, it’s Christmas Eve, which means dinner alone at home, just the two of them, before the next day topples them into a maelstrom of family and townsfolk at the Mayor’s annual Christmas celebration.  Tomorrow they will dine on traditional roast beasts (he does so enjoy that particular joke) and every vegetable under the sun, but tonight?  

Tonight they’re eating Chinese food and drinking soda, their choice of beverage all the better with which to toast young Master Mills. There will be enough grog flowing at Regina’s mansion tomorrow, thanks to the dwarves, and he’s more than happy to abstain tonight to ensure he’s in peak condition after dinner, as it were.

When they’ve organised themselves on the couch, cardboard boxes lined up on the coffee table and one of Emma’s favourite festive movies flickering on the television, he holds up his glass of soda, clinking it softly against Emma’s tumbler.  “To Henry.”

“To Henry.” Her eyes are shining brightly with the threat of tears, but her smile is steady. “He brought me to Storybrooke and gave me a family.” She taps her glass against his a second time. “Even though it was an accident, he also led me to you.”

“Indeed he did.” He grins at her, doing his best to ignore the lump in his throat. “Good lad, that one.”

“I guess I always knew he’d have to leave one day.”

“It doesn’t stop us from missing him, though.”

Her sigh makes his heart ache. “No.”

“We’ll see him again, I’m sure of it.”  

She lifts her chin, as if accepting an unspoken challenge. “I know.”

There’s my brave lass.

He puts his glass on the coffee table, then relieves her of her own untouched drink.  “Until then, my darling, we’ll have to muddle through somehow.”

She rolls her eyes at him, but laughter dances in her voice. “You’re quoting Christmas songs at me now?”

“I’m a shameless man.  If I can borrow from a lovely song that always makes your eyes come over all dreamy, I certainly will.”  

She’s blushing as he bends his head to hers, teasing the curve of her ear with his lips as he sings the words in a whisper.  “Someday soon we all will be together, if the fates allow.” He touches his mouth against hers, tasting the warmth of her sigh. “Until then, we’ll have to muddle through somehow.”

Her eyes close, her mouth curving in a small, oddly secret smile. “You should sing more often, you know.”

“Outside the shower, you mean?”  Her cheeks turn pink, and he knows she’s remembering their shared shower of the previous week.  By candlelight, no less, which had made all those slippery curves and hollows beneath his questing hand and mouth so much more intriguing. “Perhaps I’ll finally be tempted to join in with Granny and her kraken machine tomorrow.”

Her laughter is music to his ears and eyes, her smile lighting up her whole face. “That’s karaoke and you know it.”  

(They both know it will be a cold day in the Underworld before he sings modern ditties in public.)

“Speaking of tomorrow.” Her gaze meets his with such tender force that he can’t help blinking. “I have an early Christmas present for you.” She shifts closer, but makes no move to retrieve a gift from beneath the glowing tree, which in hindsight, should have been his first clue. “Which is ironic, really,” she mutters almost to herself, “the early part, I mean, because it’s all about being late when you think about it.”

As he struggles to catch up with these enigmatic words, she takes his hand and slips it beneath the hem of her shirt, encouraging him to touch her belly, stroke his fingertips from her navel to the swell of her pubic bone.  

“Guess what?”

It all comes together with a click, in his head, in his heart, beneath his suddenly trembling hand. His chest grows tight, his tongue suddenly refusing to work properly.  He looks at his wife imploringly.  “Swan?”

Pressing his hand to her belly, she leans forward, her nose almost touching his. “That’s not a food baby.”

Joy courses through him, and he finds himself sliding off the couch, sinking to his knees in front of her, his hip banging painfully on the side of the coffee table. He doesn’t care. How he doesn’t tumble the boxes of Chinese takeout to the floor, he has no idea.

“Are you sure?”

“Two positive tests and a doctor’s visit this morning say yes.”

“Bloody hell.”  He kisses her once, then twice, then she’s showering his face with kisses of her own, her cheek wet with tears against his. In between kisses, she cups his face in her hands, finding his eyes with hers.

“Do you mind that I went to the doctor without you?”

He opens his mouth to deny the gentle charge, then searches his heart.  There are no lies or half-truths between them. Not anymore. “A little, perhaps.”

“You were so busy helping Regina set up for the party this morning and I just couldn’t wait.” She brushes her thumbs at the dampness on his face. “It’s also nice to be able to tell you when we’re alone.”  Her smile is as radiant as their festive tree, and he suddenly knows exactly what she’s going to say. “You know, without everyone watching.”

His heart is so full, he’s not sure he can find the right words.  In the end, it’s a simple thing. “I love you.”

“I love you.”  

Dashing his eyes with the back of his hand, he clears his throat. “My gift can’t possibly compare,” he gestures towards the tree, feeling positively giddy. “But if I may?”

She beams at him. “Definitely.”

A moment later, she stares at the small jewellery box, her eyes widening with surprise. “Where on earth did you get this?”

It’s exactly the reaction for which he’d been hoping, and makes two months of fretting utterly worth it. “Marco knows a little pixie silversmith.”

“Of course he does,” Emma laughs. “God, it’s beautiful.”  Pulling the rose gold chain from the box, she holds it up so the small compass charm catches the light from the fireplace, her gaze intent. “Wait. It looks exactly the same as the one we had to steal from Anton.”

“The pixie silversmith takes direction very well.”

She looks at him.  “You designed this?”

“Well, I’m not one to brag-”

She doesn’t deign to rebuke such an obvious untruth. “From memory?”

“Of course.”  Taken the chain from her hand, he drapes it carefully around her neck. “I remember every single detail of our first adventure together.”  

Her smile is a beautiful, trembling thing.  “You are something else, you know that?” The tenderness in her gaze makes his knees turn to water, making him thankful he’s resumed his seat on the couch beside her. She pulls the thick curtain of her hair aside so he can settle the chain against the nape of her neck, smiling when he feels the goosepimpled skin beneath his fingertips.

The new chain and compass charm gleam against her skin, and he has a sudden (and lurid) image of her wearing nothing else, her naked body dappled with the colourful reflection from the Christmas lights.

(They haven’t christened that particular rug yet, he realises.)

He touches one fingertip to the compass, the memory of weighing its full-size counterpart in his hand seared into his soul. He didn’t know it then, of course, but that moment had been the beginning of a long and winding journey to his own happy ending.

“Swan, I don’t care if we have to muddle through, or if we know exactly where we’re going in this life.”  He smooths her hair back, letting his fingers linger in its golden strands.  “There is nowhere else I’d rather be than at your side.”

“Me too.” Her answering kiss is filled with the same promise she made on their wedding day, making his heart race.  “Merry Christmas.”  Her dimples flash in her cheeks, and he braces himself for the teasing he knows is coming.  “Dad.”

He grins. “Unlike your father, I am going to greatly relish getting used to that.”

In the end, they don’t make it far enough to christen the rug, but that’s okay. As luck would have it, the reflection of the Christmas lights do reach as far as the couch, bathing them both in a myriad of colours as they slowly move together, the lights flickering wildly as Emma finds her peak, seeming to keep time with her pleasured gasps.

Afterwards, he gathers his breathless, languid wife into his arms, half-wondering if he should make the effort to heat up their cold takeout so she doesn’t miss out on eating a proper meal. She kisses the skin above his hammering heart, then brings his hand down to touch the tiny swell of her belly, derailing that thought. “I never thought I’d get to have any of this.”

Just when he thinks there are no surprises left in this evening, she finds a new way to make him fall in love with her even more. “I know that feeling all too well, love.”

They kiss, long and slow and sweet, and when it’s over, she breathes out a long sigh of contentment.  “Should we tell my parents the good news tomorrow?”

“Definitely.” He grins. “There is a chance Regina might be annoyed at us stealing her thunder at her own party.”

Emma’s eyes light up with mischief.  “Wouldn’t that be a terrible shame?”

Pirate, he thinks proudly but doesn’t say.  By the impudent smile she flashes in his direction, however, he knows she’s read his thoughts. Definitely a pirate.

They eat their reheated Chinese takeout much later than can be considered sensible for a pair of responsible adults, but Emma assures him they don’t have to set anyone a good example for at least another six months.

As the clock ticks past midnight, taking them into Christmas Day morn, he dreams of golden hair and compasses, of ogres and beasties, the flash of swords at mock battle and the gurgle of the young Charming prince’s laughter.  Henry – no longer a boy but a man – embracing his mother, both their faces alight with identical joy. Emma’s face glowing with effort and pride, the weight of a squirming babe placed in his arms.

Killian wakes at dawn, faintly bewildered by the array of dream realms his mind had seen fit to visit as he’d slept, but he feels an odd sense of peace, his heart fuller than he could have ever imagined. His family’s course is now set true and, no matter what lies ahead, no matter which realm in which they find themselves, they will never lose their bearings again.

~*~

[moodymindymusereactions]

When they find out their s/o is great at baking

Suho:

Finding out you can bake is such a pleasant surprise for him.  He already thinks you’re amazing, but now he has one more reason to adore you.  I see Junmyeon being the type to not have a crazy sweet tooth, but at the same time knows how to appreciate a well crafted baked good.  Maybe you were just in the mood to bake that day and made entirely too much (which is always my problem tbh).  You didn’t know what to do with all the extra brownies so you took them over to the dorm for the guys to (hopefully) share.  He’d probably be somewhere in the back rooms, but the second he hears Chanyeol screaming ‘OMG I LOVE YOU’ he’s going to come investigate just what the hell the giant is up to.  When he the children with the brownies, two thing are going to go through his mind: 1. Oh shit the sugar rush these kids are going to have and 2. Just where the hell did these even come from?  Of course, then there’s you offering him a brownie, too, and he’ll take a bite and FALL IN LOVE ALL OVER AGAIN.   “You made these, jagiyah?” “Yup!” “Ugh, these are so gooood~!” (cue happy groaning)

Xiumin:

He’s someone who probably would enjoy a good pastry.  He’s definitely health conscious but we all know he likes his treats.  He would have called you one day to see what you were up to, wanting to take you out and spend time together, when you tell him you can’t go out.  Your mother’s birthday is the following day and you are busy in the kitchen making her cake.  I think he would pause for a second, the little dots popping up over his head (...) and then he’d break out into a grin! He’d ask if he could help you and most likely the two of you would spend the majority of the day baking away (and making a mess just so you can see him go into super cleaning mode).  By the time you both are done you’ve managed to make a three tier cake with fondant icing, little hearts and flowers decorated haphazardly all over it.  Honestly, you two giggle about how cheesy it looks, but secretly you know your mother will love it.  There was even enough batter left over for cupcakes!  He wouldn’t really question that you’re a baker, he would just enjoy the benefits of such a talent.   However, now that he knows you like to bake expect a lot of baking dates.  Why buy pastries when you can have them freshly baked with your own ingredients?  “We have to do this more often, jagi.  This was really fun!  Plus, look at all the goodies we have left over!”

Lay:

Cheeky bub.  You wouldn’t expect it from him, but he’s going to take full advantage of your baking skills.  He strikes me as someone who has a sweet tooth.  He’ll be the one who begs for your baking when he’s sad or upset or stressed or frustrated or had a shit week or he misses you or generally just anything.  Also beware of allowing him in the kitchen with you while you’re baking.  The cookies will slowly start to disappear one by one, but he’ll give you one of those dimpled smiles and tell you he doesn’t know what you’re talking about.  Cheeky, cheeky, I’m telling you.  It all started rather innocently, too.  You sent him cookies while he was away in China as a ‘keep your spirits up’ sort of thing, but that turned into an hour long facetime/skype/etc where he grilled you about why your cookies are so delicious!  He’ll be adamant that there’s magic in there cuz ‘there’s no way these cookies can be this soft and moist and yummy after being mailed’.  Nope no way.  He’ll buy you cute little aprons, probably any appliance you want (or didn’t ask for but he bought it anyway).  Yixing is a dotting guy in general, so just expect a lot of him supporting you in this hobby.  It’s not just because he wants more delicious treats, but because he realizes how much you really like to bake.  He just wants you to be happy.  “Baobei, this cobbler is the best!  Can you make me one for my birthday?” “Of course!” “That I don’t have to share?” “...” (cue cheeky, dimpled grin)  

Baekhyun:

Proceed with caution honestly.  Sugar and this guy are a dangerous combo.  The guys wanted to throw Junmyeon a birthday surprise and were throwing ideas around.  Of course they had the most lavish ideas about the venue and theme, but when the topic of cake came up you interjected saying it would be more meaningful if it was homemade.  This prompted Kyungsoo to start nodding in agreement, but before he could say he’d take it on, you told them you would make the cake.  Now, this is a surprise to everyone.  You weren’t someone who liked to cook too often.  It wasn’t that you couldn’t, but more that you didn’t have a lot of interest in cooking.  Baekhyun is going to be thrilled!  He’ll insist that you allow him to be your taste tester, because ‘hyung can only have the best and since I know hyung so well I’m pretty much over qualified, but don’t worry cuz I’m just your awesome boyfriend so of course I’ll lend you my expert opinions’ … ‘or you just want free handouts’  Anyway! Baking with Baekhyun will be super fun!  Expect a mess because this is the King of Beagles we’re talking about, but also don’t worry.  Baekhyun is a super sweetheart and he’ll help you clean everything up in the end.  Over all he’ll be super proud of your creation.  Any future baked goods will probably be shared with other people with the lone goal of being able to boast about how HIS jagi made them.  “Yeah, you taste that deliciousness?  Huh? My jagi made it!  I bet you wish you had a jagi like mine!”

Chen:

Sweetheart.  The sweetest of sweethearts.  He’ll find out you can bake one night after a long practice, when he’s extremely tired and just wants to go to bed.  He’ll walk in the door and just stop...and sniff cuz like, that’s not how your apartment usually smells, but like he’s not upset.  It smells good, but there are so many scents he’s just confused as to what exactly he’s smelling.  In the kitchen you’re bustling this way and that, stacks of brownies and cookies littering every inch of counter space, tubes of icing of every color, little paper ramekins in pastels are on the table next to the cutest little plastic bags along with a few rolls of various colored ribbon.  Your friend had called you at like seven thirty and told you they had completely forgotten about the bake sale tomorrow and they didn’t have the means to actually bake anything and you can’t bring anything store bought (AND DON’T EVEN TRY TO FAKE IT CUZ THEY’LL KNOW), so you kindly offered to whip something up last minute.  He’s surprised at first because this was never something that ever came up, but then slowly that surprised look just melts into the most loving stare possible because as you explain the whole situation to him hurriedly, running around and icing the cupcakes and checking on the cake in the oven, Jongdae can just imagine having a family with you one day.  The image just settles in his head and he feels so content.  He’ll make you pause for a second so he back hug you and kiss you sweetly before offering his help.  “You can’t go making all this for our children, okay baby?  You know what I’m like, can you imagine a mini me on a sugar high?  That won’t be good for either of our health.”  *he just starts talking about the future like it’s the most natural thing ever.  Precious husband material right here ladies and gents.  Appreciate this man, please*   

Chanyeol:

You know the nursery rhyme “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star”?  Those are his eyes when you present him with a bag of sweets for his tour.  You had made them fresh the night before under the guise that you were still angry at him for not telling you about their surprise tour.  He had thought you weren’t going to see him off, but there you were standing with the carefully wrapped treat box in your outstretched hands and an apologetic smile on your face.  It had been silly to get mad at him over something he couldn’t control, which was why you wanted to do something special for him.  You knew how much he liked a particular sweet, so you spent a good portion of the previous afternoon/evening perfecting a large batch for him to take with him.  Expect teary eyes and a huge bear hug.  Also expect for him to pout, cuz yeah, that was a little mean, but he loves you and he promises to eat your goodies joyfully on his trip.  ALSO expect him to video call you an hour into the flight with crumbs on his face and eyes the size of saucers because holy shit this stuff is good and ‘did you make this?’ ‘are you sure?’ ‘please make this for me everyday of the rest of my life!’ ‘yes I am proposing to you over a box of sweets!’.  This is just another reason for the giant to fall in love with you, honestly.  “What do you mean I can’t eat them all right now?” “you’ll get a stomachache, Channie” “So?” “What do you mean ‘so’?” “You’ll take care of me, right? So it’ll be worth it!”

D.O:

This one is a foodie.  He loves to cook!  I don’t know if he bakes, but we all know he enjoys experimenting in the kitchen for sure.  I think finding out you can bake would just make him fall for you more.  It would be a day where he’s off and he wants to spoil you with some food, so you decide that it’s only fair to spoil him back by baking for him.  We all know that surprised look he gets sometimes.  The one where his eyebrows raise and his mouth droops at the corners.  It’s all a very pleasant surprise for him.  The way he sees it is this is just another way for the two of you to spend time together.  He doesn’t like to share his kitchen, to be honest, but if it’s you, it’s okay.  The two of you will probably end up dancing around each other, learning the other’s movements with ease and just coexisting.  Something the rest of the guys are going to think is absolutely flooring, because 1. No one is allowed in the kitchen when Kyungsoo is cooking and 2. How the hell are you two not running into each other?  Kyungsoo will make you a deal going forward.  When he makes a new recipe for a meal, you have to make a new recipe for dessert.  It’s competitive in the smallest of ways, only because it’s almost like a test to see who’s first time recipe turned out the best.  It honestly doesn’t matter if it’s terrible, Kyungsoo seems like the type to come up with some way of improving it so it’s edible and just being over all so encouraging.  He knows from experience that the kitchen can be just as challenging as learning new choreography, so don’t ever worry about him hating your food.  This guy looks like a menace, but he’s the most cuddly muffin ever.  “Wah! Jagi, these are delicious!  Is this a new recipe?” *shy nod* “Hmm, then you need to make these more often.  I think I’ve found a new favorite.” (cue proud temple kiss)

Kai:

He’s more quiet about his love for your baking.  He loves it so much, but in true Jongin fashion he’s just very quiet.  He loves to watch you in the kitchen, bustling around.  What he loves the most about it is the fact that your creations are always so pretty.  He didn’t even know you could bake until you showed up after one of their album releases with a bunch of cupcakes that were designed like the album’s artwork.  He was floored!  Of course, don’t expect him to be too quiet.  He’ll whine and pout if you don’t have any around the house, cuz ‘they’re so yummy and I have a craving’ ‘what do you mean you don’t have any left’  ‘can’t you make some more’ *cue puppy eyes*  ‘pretty please?’  You can’t say no to this guy at all.  But like I said, he likes to watch you bake.  If you question him about it, he’ll just shrug and give you one of those sheepish smiles we all know and love.   Jongin is your taste tester, your guinea pig, your everything when it comes to baking.  If you’re struggling with a new recipe, he’s right there to encourage you to keep going because ‘it’s okay, you’ll get it don’t worry’.  When you do succeed in perfecting it, he’ll celebrate with you happily, cutely hugging you and giving you soft kisses.  Jongin just strikes me as a gentle, calm lover, so he’d be the same way in his encouragements and comforting.  But, like, don’t forget he’s a Capricorn.  They don’t look like it, but they can be pranksters of the worst kind.  So if you ever burn a batch of cookies or a cake, pray for everyone who surrounds him.  This devious boi is going to cover the burned food in icing/melted chocolate/whatever it takes to cover it up and leave them in the break room for his victims to contemplate their life’s choices.  “Ninni, you know that’s really mean, right?” “I only want them to enjoy a tasty treat, jagi.  Sharing is caring.” *he’ll say this with a completely straight face*

Sehun:

Honestly, you can’t keep this shit to yourself.  He’s going to in your kitchen constantly cuz he’s a ‘growing boy’, which basically just means he’ll eat you out of house and home.  He’s going to discover that you bake, but not tell you he knows.  Not directly anyway.  You’ll find out when you run out of cookies.  He’ll have his hand in the jar and he’s just swishing it around and around with this disgruntled expression on his face.  He’ll turn to you quite suddenly and demand where the cookies went, cuz they’re his favorite, but he’ll likely never admit that to your face.  If you make him cookies, make more than necessary, because like Yixing, he’s going to be eating them as you make them.  You might even have to force him out of the kitchen just so there will be some left for later.  When you offer to send him home with some, he’ll look at you like you’ve lost your mind cuz ‘why the hell would I do that?’  he doesn’t want to share his goodies with anyone and he knows the second he walks through the door ‘those bloodhounds are going to be after my cookies’.  Honestly, he loves that you bake.  He thinks it’s pretty amazing seeing as he’s pretty much shit with baking, too many instructions to follow.  He won’t want cakes that aren’t yours and he’ll definitely be super snobby about other people’s cookies.  “Huh, you call these things cookies?  They’re rocks with chocolate in them.  You obviously don’t know what a real cookie tastes like and no, you can’t have mine.  Buzz off.”

--Admin MM

[evilqueens]

A vampire mermaid AU. After surviving a shipwreck caused by deadly sea creatures, a recovering Robin’s left to wonder why he was spared. He wasn’t left completely unscathed by them however, and he soon learns that one particular mermaid may not be finished with him after all.

yooo. guess what i finally finished! here’s chapter two of the (still untitled) vampire mermaid au (like tbh at this point i will take suggestions on the title because honestly i just don’t know). 

tagging my fav cheerleaders @idoltina @the-alpha-incipiens (who both were so kind as to look over this) and @the-notsoevil-queen (who made art and more art like seriously go look at it bc i’m still crying about it).

and here’s part one.

(chapter two - bitten)

Three days Robin spends in bed, and by the the last evening he swears he’s about to go mad from the tediousness of doing nothing. His aches serve as a distraction at first — that first morning was the worst when he woke to muscles feeling even more sore than the night before, and he couldn’t deny how nice the prospect of sleeping it off sounded. But a whole day of sleep quickly lent to a good portion of that night with him wide awake and having nothing to do.

Mary Margaret had fussed over him the entire time, insisting he sleep once he’d decided he’d had enough of doing so, bringing him his meals herself and keeping him company while he ate. She’d taken Roland to the market, and had come back to the manor delivering well-wishes from everyone in Mist Haven who knew Robin, and it had made him itch even more to leave this damn room and get a proper start to his summer.

Today he’s finally going to get to do just that — no matter what his aching body or Mary Margaret had to say about it.

He changes into the clothes Leo Blanchard had been surprisingly thoughtful enough to come deliver to Robin himself, and Robin spares a quick thank you to the Fates that he hadn’t thought to bring anything of particular value with him on this trip, or else it would’ve found its way to the bottom of the ocean. He trains himself to ignore the pains that shoot through his body as he moves his way around the room. But he’s still left a bit breathless by the time he’s deemed himself presentable enough to go out, and he’s grateful that Mary Margaret had been so kind as to care for Roland herself these past few days — he’s not sure he would’ve quite managed getting them both ready for the day.

He takes a quick look in the mirror, his eyes immediately landing on the bandage on his neck, and he sighs. The sting of the bite has subsided to slight pains that come and go, and the redness and swelling have let up a bit as well, but Robin can’t help the unease of having the wound as he changes the small bandage for it. The relief of living through a mermaid attack is still fierce, and strengthened by the fact that his boy made it through something that’s normally unavoidably fatal with barely a scratch on him. But seeing the bite in the mirror fills Robin with a vague sense of violation, along with unwanted questions regarding how exactly he and Roland ended up safely on Mist Haven shores, miles away from where the ship had crashed.

He covers up the bite again, and idly considers throwing on a scarf despite the hot and humid weather. Another discomfort at having the bite — people looking, people asking questions. Mary Margaret stares at the bandage far more than Robin appreciates, and he’s loathe to go into town and receive the same attention.

He makes his way downstairs, each step just a touch away from brutal as the sore muscles in his legs and his back protest. He makes sure to mask the pain however, as Mary Margaret insisting he spend another day holed up in his appointed room is not even close to an option he’s willing to entertain.

He finds her and Roland in the kitchen, along with a maid washing dishes who offers him some breakfast. He turns her down, much to Mary Margaret’s dismay.

“I’ll eat at the tavern,” Robin assures her. “I’ve wasted three days of this trip lying in bed, I’m far enough behind schedule as it is,” he jokes.

Mary Margaret quirks an eyebrow, unamused. “You were recovering,” she corrects him. “And you have the whole summer to catch up with everyone in town. You need to eat,” she insists, and Robin glances at the poor maid, who’s stopped washing the dish in her hands and is waiting unsurely for direct instruction.

Robin nods towards the leftover food sitting on the stove. “Scrambled eggs sound lovely,” he says, and the maid smiles in assent and sets the soapy plate down. He immediately cuts off Mary Margaret’s insistences of him having more than scrambled eggs, “A plate of scrambled eggs is more than enough to get me to the tavern, where I promise you I will insist they treat me like a king.” He smirks at her scowl.

“Papa,” Roland pipes up before Mary Margaret can continue her argument, “can we go to the beach?”

The air gets tinged with tension. “What for, my boy?” Robin asks, though he certainly doesn’t need to.

“I want to see the mermaid,” Roland answers, oblivious to the strain in the mood. He pushes around crumbs of food on his plate with his spoon.

Robin sees Mary Margaret glance at the bandage on his neck.

Robin moves to pick the boy up, swallowing down a groan as his muscles ache in protest. “Maybe later my boy,” he says with a slight tightness in his voice that he hopes Mary Margaret doesn’t notice. “First we’ve got to go see all our friends at the pub. I know Will and Little John are dying to see you!” He ruffles Roland’s curls, earning a giggle and a nod. “Let’s get to it then!”

He forces his aching legs to move forward, as quick as he can to avoid Mary Margaret’s protests, though he spares an apologetic glance at the maid standing with a plate of scrambled eggs in hand.

He manages to make it out the front door before acquiescing to his screaming muscles and putting Roland down, and he counts it as an accomplishment.

—

It’s impossible to venture out into the village and not think of Marian.

It’s the main reason Robin waited so long after the loss of her to visit Mist Haven. For most of her life, this place was the only home she’d ever known — the only place she’d ever cared to call a home. As much as he knew she enjoyed the forests of Sherwood, he’d long since accepted the ingrained sense of peace and comfort Marian carried for this small, seaside village. And he knows, if she’d still been around, they eventually would’ve found themselves back here, settled in a nice little cottage, with Marian raising Roland to love the sea as much as she did.

The ache in Robin’s heart is one he knows will never fully disappear.

The heat of the sun is more uncomfortable than Robin expects as he and Roland make their way through the village square. It’s late in the morning, not yet noon but close, and Robin supposes his lack of tolerance for the heat is probably more due to all the other discomforts on his body.

Trying to distract himself, he takes a good look at the square, at the people, and keeps an eye on Roland, who’s skipping a few paces in front of him — most likely impatient with the irritatingly slow stride Robin’s managing. He takes note of familiar establishments, Marian’s favorite shops, and new places he plans to come visit in the next couple of days. As Mary Margaret had pointed out, he has the whole summer to become reacquainted with Mist Haven and all that he’s missed in three years he’s been gone. And he’s determined not to miss a single spot.

A nostalgic warmth fills his chest that brings some relief to the ache in his heart.

When they reach the tavern, Robin takes hold of Roland’s hand and opens the door for them. There’s not much change in humidity inside the pub, but Robin breathes out a sigh of relief once he loses the feeling of the sun’s rays on the back of his neck.

The tavern’s not busy, probably won’t see more people till lunchtime at the earliest, and Robin guides Roland towards the counter with ease. He watches Little John take notice of their arrival with a huge smile, and the man sets down the rag and mug he was wiping. Roland hollers when he sees him, escaping Robin’s grip on his hand and running the rest of the way to the counter.

“Little John!”

John’s one of few people from town Roland’s already gotten to meet, thanks to the occasional trips they’ve made to Sherwood over the last few years. Little John, a friend Robin’s had long before they’d both stumbled into this little seaside village together, had visited the most recently along with Will Scarlet, and it’s the most vivid memory four-year-old Roland has of any of his honorary relatives. The excitement emanating from the boy brings a smile to Robin’s face.

He braces himself for the onslaught of pain, and then picks up Roland and places him on the counter. He can’t help the tight grunt of pain he lets out, and the grin on John’s face falters.

“Take it easy, there,” John tells him, a big hand moving to grip Roland’s leg and slide him closer. Roland giggles at the motion. “I hear you’ve had a rough couple of days.”

Understatement, Robin thinks, and John smirks at his friend’s grimace.

“I’m a bit worse for wear,” Robin admits, taking a seat on a stool. His mind brings forth a brief flash of remembrance for the men he saw lose their lives a few days ago, and his eyes turn somber.

John’s face turns apologetic. “The guys and I would’ve made our way over to the Blanchard manor to see you,” he explains, “but y’know, I’ve never been as close to good ol’ Leopold as you have.” John gives him a wink, which Robin meets with a tight smile.

“I wouldn’t have been pleasant company anyway,” Robin dismisses. “Not much excitement in watching me toss and turn in bed for three days.”

“Well how about you catch me up on how you ended up bed-ridden in the first place?” When the discomfort doesn’t leave Robin’s face, John adds, “Maybe over a drink?”

“I can’t imagine you haven’t already heard what happened,” Robin said, “If not from the rumor mill, then at least from Mary Margaret.”

John smirks at the quip, but pushes on, “Nothing like hearing it from the source himself. Now c’mon, tell me exactly how you managed to walk away from a ship doomed to mermaids.”

“A mermaid helped!” Roland pipes up, and Robin suppresses a groan.

“A mermaid helped?” John repeats, a little dumbfounded. He indulges Roland nevertheless, “You don’t say?”

Roland nods enthusiastically. “Yes, she helped me and Papa and she bringed us to the beach!”

John looks up at Robin’s tight expression and raises an eyebrow. Not quite knowing what to say (not quite knowing if he could truthfully dispute Roland’s story, if he’s honest), Robin settles on what he does remember. “I fell off the ship, somehow ended up on the shore, and woke up at the Blanchard manor.”

“With a bite,” John adds, looking pointedly at the bandage on Robin’s neck. “You forgot that part.”

“I don’t really know much about that part.”

John stares silently at him for a moment before shaking his head. “Only you would get attacked by mermaids and live to tell the tale,” he marvels. He raises the glass he’d been cleaning in the air. “Tonight, I say we drink, to the almighty Prince of Thieves —”

Robin rolls his eyes at the title, but he can’t stop the smile curving his lips. Drinks that night sound great, if he’s honest. A night out with friends he’s missed dearly. Even if the attention will be on the tragedy he just survived, or the wound on his neck, it’s still step toward some normalcy — toward the idea he’d had of how he’d be spending his trip before even having boarded that boat.

“—with charms so strong not even a mermaid could resist,” John finishes, and Robin’s smile falters.

“You believe him?” Robin asks, glancing at Roland who’s gleefully lifted his fist in the air to match the glass in John’s hand.

“I believe the kid has no reason to lie,” John answers. And despite the absurdity of it, Robin can’t find it himself to disagree.

—

The steady sound of the waterfall gushing a few meters away has become rather comforting in the short while Regina’s been its presence, and with each passing second she’s even more reluctant to head home.

The end of her tail dips into the water as she sits at the edge of a rocky piece of land, shoveling up to splash water as she braids parts of her hair. It’s been three days since she’s been home — three days since she saved the boy and his father, and she has since been too troubled by her actions to face talking to anyone. Particularly anyone who might’ve seen what she had done.

She doesn’t regret saving them (the boy’s sweet, brown eyes and dimpled cheeks haven’t left her thoughts since she deposited him next to his unconscious father that evening), but she knows her motives would be troubling to her peers — laughable to most — and altogether a great opportunity for them to bring up her mother.

No one shies away from any chance to badmouth Cora.

Once Regina finishes her braid she starts on another, resolved to stay just a little longer before finally making it back to the reefs. The longer she stays away, the more questions she’ll have to face. She’s halfway through the braid when she senses movement in the water of someone fast approaching. She flips her tail back out of the water, let it land next to her with a wet thud. Her eyes narrow as she sees the bright green flash moving towards her in the water, and though she immediately recognizes who it is, she stays tense, bracing herself for the conversation she’s been trying to avoid for the past couple of days.

Tink’s head breaks through the surface bun-first, and she moves her hands to grip the edge of land where Regina’s seated. “What’re you doing here?” she asks, raising her voice against the gush of the waterfall. “I’ve been waiting for you to come back for days.” There’s a hint of exasperation in her voice.

“What for?” Regina asks, hoping to direct the subject away from her.

“Aurora’s baby was born,” Tink tells her, and Regina feels a tinge of guilt in her chest. She and Aurora aren’t close; but still, the birth of a baby is an occasion involving the whole family of mermaids in the reefs. A hint of irritation sweeps through her, knowing that missing such an event had to have drawn attention to her absence by more than just Tink.

“I’m sure she managed just fine without me being there,” Regina says. “Why aren’t you there now?” she asks.

Tink glares at her. “I’ve been looking for you!” she shoots back, miffed. “I hope whatever it is that’s kept you here is worth Blue’s wrath when you get home.” She looks satisfied when Regina’s face falls.

“Of course she would take the time through helping someone give birth to notice I’m not there,” Regina mutters. She lets the end of her tail fall back into the water.

“So why weren’t you there?” Tink probes.

“I’ve had a lot on my mind,” Regina answers vaguely. “Too much noise in the reefs to think clearly.”

Tink raises an eyebrow. “And what exactly is on your mind that you’ve been away for three whole days? I asked everyone who came back from that hunting trip for you, even Zelena” — Tink makes a face at the name — “and no one knew what happened to you.”

Relief floods through Regina. She strongly hopes it’s the truth, and no one had paid enough attention to witness her heroic antics. She thinks of the man she left half-conscious on the shore, and one of her other worries comes to sit first on her mind. Without really thinking about it, Regina asks, “What do you know about the biting bond?”

Tink’s face turns to one of confusion. “Sorry?”

Regina looks away. “You know, when you bite a human, but don’t kill them. Surely your access into the Knowledge Caves has granted you some information on that.”

“It’s not something I’ve ever cared to look into,” Tink answers unsurely, still thrown by Regina’s question. “Why do you ask?” She gives Regina a suspicious look. “You didn’t… do that, did you?”

Regina’s attention goes back to the braids in her hair, which is slightly drier with the amount of time she’d been sitting out of the water. She notices the dryness of her upper tail now as well.

“Regina,” Tink says firmly. “Did you create a bond with a human?” There’s some admonishment in her tone that Regina immediately resents, and she rolls her eyes at the little blonde.

Seeing no point in lying, she responds with, “You say it as if I set out to do so.”

“Well I don’t really see how you could’ve done it on accident,” Tink says. “Even if for any reason you were interrupted mid-bite, they still would’ve drowned.”

Regina sighs, leaning forward to cup some water in her hands. Letting the water fall on the scales of her tail, she starts, “You know I don’t like eating human children…”

Tink’s eyes soften slightly, but she doesn’t answer.

Regina continues, “There was a little boy on the ship we hunted three days ago. He fell overboard, and… I couldn’t handle watching anyone get to him. So I rescued him.” She takes a breath. “His father was on the ship. And I wasn’t gonna leave the boy without him, without someone to care for him, or what was the point?” Though her resolve was solid at the time, the excuse now sounds weak saying it aloud to someone who doesn’t share the same position as her.

She avoids Tink’s eyes, cupping more water in her hands to drop on her tail. She keeps going, “I saved the man, but I didn’t get a chance to feed beforehand. So I had to bite him…” She awkwardly looks over at Tink then, having nothing else to say.

Tink’s eyes are wide as she looks at Regina, seeming at a loss for what to say. “That’s…” she trails off.

Regina rolls her eyes at her friend’s reaction (overreaction in her opinion). “It’s not like I’m gonna do anything about it,” she tells her, exasperated. “I’ll never even see him again.”

“Won’t you?” Tink asks. The question throws Regina, and Tink continues, “I may not know the details of bonding, but I do know basics. They’re not just bound to you, you’re bound to them too. You don’t sense him at all?”

“No,” Regina answers, and to her relief it’s the truth. Yes, she’s spent the last three days thinking of nothing but him and his son (were they rescued? has he recovered?), but aside from this unhealthy new obsession, she hasn’t felt any different since having bitten the man.

Tink’s eyebrows knit in confusion. “Really? That’s not how I’ve heard it goes.” Her eyes brighten with an idea. “Oh, Miss Nimue would know for sure, we could go ask —”

“No!” Regina launches herself into the water, Tink moving back instinctively. “You will tell no one about this,” she tells her friend darkly. “I told you, I feel nothing, and I’ll never see him again so it doesn’t matter. Let’s just go home,” she says, and dives underwater.

Tink follows her, looking uncertain. “This could be dangerous Regina, you should try to —”

“There is no danger,” she cuts Tink off. Then, knowing Tink’s thoughts must have drifted to Cora at least once during this conversation (it always comes back to Cora), Regina asserts, “I won’t go near another human ever again and let them live to tell the tale.”

Although she means it as the truth, it sounds like a lie to her ears.

—

Robin can’t sleep.

It’s been over an hour since he’d returned from the tavern, with just enough ale in his belly to give some relief to the sore spots on his body. But apparently, not enough to lull him into sleep. The manor is dark and quiet, and Robin takes a seat on the couch in the parlor, the thought of lying awake in his bed not at all an enticing one after having done nothing but for the past three days.

Instead, he sits back on the couch and lets his thoughts run. He thinks of Marian, whose memory is so engraved in every inch of this town that he sometimes finds it hard to breathe. He wonders if he’ll be able to make it through the whole summer here when he has a memory of her for almost every part of the town, memories he hasn’t had a chance to make peace with yet, and he wonders if he’s ready to do that now.

He knows she would want this, he tries to remind himself, that she would want him here. She would want him to show Roland every place in this village that mattered to her, to share this part of his mother’s life to him because for so long it was everything to her. She would want Robin to take him to have lunch with Granny Lucas, and to show him the quirky trinket shop that wasn’t there the last time Robin was here, but he knows that Marian would’ve loved. She would want him to take Roland to the beach as often as was allowed, have him become acquainted with sand in his shoes and his curls, and learning to collect seashells and how to be mindful of the tide.

Roland wants that now, an unwanted voice reminds him, though another part of Robin is quick to argue that his constant requests to visit the beach have little to do with the beach itself and more to do with the deadly creatures living deeper in the waters. Robin sighs, rubbing his eyes as his thoughts turn back to this dreaded subject he’s learning is inevitable now.

He needs to change his bandage, he remembers, and his hand moves to gently rip the cloth off his neck. He can’t bring himself to move however, to go clean the wound and cover it up again. His mind goes back to his night at the pub, where Little John had gleefully told everyone that Robin had charmed a mermaid into saving him and Roland from certain death. And all his friends, pleasantly drunk and needing little more to celebrate, had cheered without a second thought.

He thinks back to Roland, who’s tried to get away with enough fibs that Robin knows when the boy’s being untruthful. And so he knows his son isn’t lying, he truly believes the story he’s told anyone who would listen. And though that’s not exactly enough for Robin to believe something so absurd, so unheard of, one thing is certain -- for there’s no other way he and Roland could’ve ended up safely on the shores of Mist Haven otherwise: someone (something?) in the water had saved them.

And despite his desire to just forget the incident happened and move on, Robin knows he has to find out who or what it was that did. He feels a stirring in his chest as he reaches that decision, and it seems to help solidify it as Robin tries to figure out how exactly to go about solving this mystery. The beach, something inside him says, and he doesn’t shy away from the thought this time, as he figures that’s as good a starting point as any, maybe talk to Mr. Smee again to see what he remembers, what he saw…

The beach.

He doesn’t really think about it as he gets up, moves out of the parlor and to the front door. It’s when the warm heat outside hits his face that he thinks to himself that what he’s doing is ridiculous, but it does nothing to stop him as he starts making his way towards the beach.

It’s a bit of a walk, and by the time he reaches the shores his muscles are complaining once more, but he pays his discomfort little mind as he ventures closer to the water. It’s faint, but he can hear it now; a soft tune that he now knows has been humming since he left the manor, not loud enough to reach his ears until he reached the beach, but with a luring quality strong enough to reach his heart from all the way back in the parlor.

He follows the song now, entranced. Somewhere in the back of his head he recognizes the hypnotic song, and a voice screams to turn back, to cover his ears, but the thought’s muted as Robin gets closer and the voice grows stronger. He reaches a small cluster of rocks by the waters, and his heartbeat quickens as he ventures his way through them. The moon was strong enough to light his way when he first reached the beach, but he’s careful now to watch his step amongst the dark, bumpy path, bracing his hands against boulders as he struggles to reach the water.

He sits on a low boulder resting on the sea, easing himself slowly into the shallow water. He’s wading waist-deep when the tune stops. He grips another nearby rock for purchase, his mind going foggy without the lilting guide telling him where to go.

“Interesting.”

Robin’s head whips around at the unexpected voice, and his eyes scan the sea trying to find its owner in the dark. He slowly wades further into the water, his feet beginning to lose contact with the floor of the sea, and his heartbeat quickening again as his mind slowly starts to clear. He can hear his instincts now telling him to get out of the water, but before he can process the thought enough to follow the instruction he sees her, peeking out from behind the farthest boulder.

He freezes at the sight of her, and after a moment she deems his lack of movement safe enough for her to venture forward. He notices her slight struggle with shallowness of the water and before he can tell himself not to, he’s moving forward himself to meet her. She tenses a bit as Robin approaches, but a quick glance at his eyes has a slight smirk gracing her lips.

Not breaking his gaze, she begins to wade backward now, her iridescent tail flipping forward underwater. She crooks a finger as an indication for Robin to follow her. He does, swimming deeper into the waters until they’ve reached the rock she was hiding behind. He’s submerged to the neck now, only the tips of his shoes touching the ground, and he idly realizes he went into the water fully clothed.

He stares warily at the mermaid, who seems to have lost any apprehension she might’ve had when he’d first entered the water. She’s beautiful, with long, dark hair falling over her shoulders. He has a flash of remembrance to what were probably those same thick locks blocking out the beam of the sunset almost four days ago. She seems to sense his anxiety (his fear, though he doesn’t wish to admit it), and she smiles in amusement. Her exposed teeth make him aware of the wound on his neck that he never got to re-bandage.

She moves closer, pushing into him until his back hits the side of the boulder. Her eyes are pitch black in the night, but they still seem to sparkle as she murmurs easily, “I never thought I’d see you again.”

[szopenhauer]

if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to? everything I ever read, watch or listen to and that would still not be enough for sure to even partially understand me

are you a musician? nah

if you’d grown up in a different environment, do you think you’d have turned out the same? no, at least not exactly

would you say your tumblr is a fair representation of the “real you”? only part of me because I save most of the stuff on pendrive and I don’t post some stuff in here even tho it looks like I share everything

which Harry Potter house would you be in? or are you a muggle? I’m a muggle but I guess I’m closest to Ravenclaw

do you love easily? nope

how often would you want to see your family every year? dad often?

have you ever felt like you had a “mind-meld” with someone? my gf and my father

could you live as a hermit? maybe

Do you like the way you look? not really, I like my style and I’m not the ugliest but I still have some insecurities  Have you ever cut your hair yourself? I usually do, sometimes ask for my mother’s help 

Are you a fan of bread and butter? I hate butter, it’s like eating soap, gross

Do you like your room? I wish I had wallpaper and different furniture/floor etc. If a friend called you to help hide a body, would you help or turn them in? dunno, depends Have you ever had a crush on someone that, now as you look back, is completely embarrassing? could say so Ever kissed someone who wasn’t single? if I was in relationship with them then they weren’t single :P just saying Ever spit in someone’s food/drink? don’t do that :o

Does it bother you when you have crumbs on your bed? that’s annoying so I never eat in bed Do you drive or use public transportation? bus or just walk Do you prefer candles or incense? I prefer no smells but I liked incense more in the past tbh, scentless candles are better but I don’t use them as it’s pointless - only birthday cake of Christmas if I have to

What’s something you do even though you know it’s bad for you? ugh... Is your bedroom usually messy or tidy? messy Do you text or talk on your cell phone more? text Have you ever dressed up as a clown? sorta Do you consider yourself a good dancer? not the worst Warm weather or cold weather? warm Do you like it when people are jealous of you? they have nothing to be jealous of

Do you like ice in your water? nah

Have you ever inhaled helium? noooooo

Do you know any card tricks? one

Do you like bubble wrap? I don’t care for it

Do you ever wear clothing of the opposite sex? sure, today I bought socks in childrens section with “for boys” written on it today because I liked ‘em and they were my size *shrug*

Have you ever taken karate classes? it was self defence class but had some karate elements in it

Have you ever given flowers to someone? of course

Do you have a passport? what for, I don’t travel, especially abroad

Have you ever been to a planetarium? I haven’t and am not interested

Have you ever ridden a motorcycle? not yet

Have you ever milked a cow? dunno if I would ever try lol

When was the last time you went trick-or-treating? we don’t do that in Poland so...

Have you ever used a slingshot? no, I used/own a bow

When was the last time you saw someone you went to high school with?: this summer

What breed was the last dog you saw?: my dog is mixed

How long have your parents been together (or how long were they together, if they no longer are): over 30 years

Has anyone in your life ever treated you abusively?: more than one person, shitload of times

Would you date someone who has a hearing aid? yup

If you were to be stuck on a deserted tropical island, how big would you like the island to be? it’s not about size but what’s there

Have you ever brought home a stray animal? yep

Song? I was listening to Lana Del Rey and David Bowie all day long

Would you date someone with braces? done XD

Do you ever rehearse conversations before you have them? that’s my thing

You notice someone staring intently at you, what do you do? raise my eyebrow?

Do you blush easily? I barely every blush, only my current partner can make me blush 

When taking a cab, do you talk to the driver? I hate that

Would you ever work at McDonald’s? I don’t think so Are you a member of any dating sites? was

Girls, how old were you when you first learned how to put in a tampon? I used pads Would you ever attend a gay pride parade or festival? I would In general, do you think you are nicer to girls or guys? girls Have you ever seen a double rainbow? I saw double rainbow indeed, even not that long time ago again Do you have a favorite TV show that actually isn’t on air anymore? Buffy Do you use the facebook chat often? constantly Do you have any baby pictures of yourself on your computer? not on computer Last person you talked to? online or irl? You’ve had sex within these past 10 days haven’t you? *counting on my fingers*

Do you like beer? If so, what’s your favourite brand?: ewww, yuk

Do you feel bad when you throw food out?: very

How do you feel right now?: emotionally/mentally bad

Have you ever broken a window, intentionally or not?: luckily not

Can you sing?: not well 

Have you ever watched an entire season of a tv show in one day? woah that’s too much :o

Do you like shrimp?: hell no

Are you lactose intolerant?: been told

What colour shirt are you wearing right now?: mostly white

What day of the week is it? Wednesday What does that mean you have to do? go to sleep, it’s almost midnight What are your plans for tomorrow? shopping, clean my room...

Would you rather visit the Taj Mahal or the Eiffel Tower? Eiffel Tower because of my S.O. Have you showered yet today? I’ll go now Have you ever won more than $100 dollars playing the lottery? I wish Do you have any nieces or nephews? niece How short would you be willing to cut your hair? almost bald but won’t, M. would kill me If someone made a movie about your life, who would star as you? Maisie Williams Is your birthday in winter? sadly Did you graduate high school within the last 2 years? I graduated high school about 10 years ago Will you graduate high school in the next 2 years? look above

Do you have any youtube videos of yourself? they’re private

What are somethings you never leave your house without? panties