#and the cards will answer

[arcanespillo]

patron saint of being twisted up inside over fleeting crushes <3

MEAN

[kizzer55555]

DP x DC: The Most Dangerous Card Game

Ok so Danny has essentially claimed earth as his. And he is fully aware that there are constant threats to the planet. Now he can’t stop a threat that originates on earth (that’s something he’ll leave to the Justice league) but he can do something about outside threats. Doing some research on ancient spells, rituals, and artifacts, he cast a world wide barrier on the planet to protect it from hostile threats so they cannot enter. This will prevent another Pariah Dark incident. However, barriers like this come at a price. You see, there are two ways to make a barrier. Either make one powered up by your own energy and power (which would be constantly draining) or set up a barrier with rules. The way magic works is that nothing can be absolutely indestructible. It must have a weakness. The most powerful barriers weren’t the ones reinforced with layer after layer of protective charms and buffed up with power. Those could eventually be destroyed either by being overpowered, wearing them down, or by cutting off the original power source. No, the most powerful barriers were the ones with a deliberate weakness. A barrier indestructible except for one spot. A cage that can only be opened from the outside. Or that can only be passed with a key or by solving a riddle. So Danny chooses this type of barrier and does the necessary ritual and pours in enough power to make it. And he adds his condition for anyone to enter. 

Now the Justice league? Find out about the barrier when Trigon attempts to attack, they were preparing after he threatened what he would do once he got to earth. How he would destroy them. The Justice league tried to take the fight to him first but were utterly destroyed, so they retreated home to tend to their injuries, and fortify earth for one. Last. Stand. Only when Trigon makes his big entrance…he’s stopped.

The Justice league watch in awe as this thin see-through barrier with beautiful green swirls and speckled white lights like stars apears blocking Trigon and his army’s advance. The barrier looks so thin and fragile yet no matter how hard the warlord hits, none of his attacks can get through and neither can he damage said barrier. That’s when Constantine and Zatanna recognizes what this barrier is. Something only a powerful entity could create. For a moment, the league is filled with hope that Trigon can’t get through yet Constantine also explains that it’s not impenetrable. And clearly Trigon knows this too for he calls out a challenge. 

And that’s when, in a flash of light, a tiny glowing teenager appears. He looked absolutly minuscule compared to Trigon and yet practically glowed with power (this isn’t a King Danny AU though).

And that is when the conditions for passing the barrier are revealed. And the Justice realize that the only thing stopping Trigon and his army from decimating earth. The only way he can get through….is by beating this glowing teenager in a card game. 

Not just any card game though. The most convoluted game Sam, Danny, and Tucker invented themselves. It’s like the infinite realms version of magic the gathering, combined with Pokémon, and chess. And Danny is the master. So sit down Trigon and let’s play.

(The most intense card game of the Justice league’s life).

After Danny wins, this happens a few more times with outer word beings and possibly even demons attempting to invade earth, yet none have been able to beat the mysterious teenager in a card game. Constantine might even take a crack at it and try to figure out how to play. He’s really bad though. Every time this happens, the Justice league worry that this might be the time the teenager looses. Yet every time, he wins (even if only barely). 

Meanwhile, Danny, Sam, and Tucker have gotten addicted to the game and play it almost daily. Some teachers might seem them playing the game are are like ‘awww how cute’ not realizing this game is literally saving the world. Jazz is just happy they aren’t spending as much time on their screens playing Doomed.

[chalkrub]

do you think it’s a friendly wolf

[markscherz]

Found your account from one of my mutuals reblogging that one mini frog post, could I learn about some fucked up frogs :D

Everybody is always banging on about Pipa pipa. Nobody is ever talking about how fucked up Hemiphractidae reproduction is

Like, they range from concealed carry, like this Gastrotheca orophylax

[src]

which they achieve with a pouch that has a weird ass opening (lack of hyphenation intentional) (not actually anywhere near the cloaca of the frog) (this has earned them the common name 'marsupial frogs' for a very obvious reason)

[src]

…to open carry, like this Fritziana goeldii

[src]

which hatch out but remain glued on until developing sufficiently, like this Cryptobatrachus boulengeri

[src]

Pretty fucked up, if you ask me.

[jaggedjot]

Foreshadowing is opening the season with the tale of a child vampire whose physical otherness causes it to be rejected by its kin, before being killed when they deem it unable to live independently, and how their parent, who is as culpable for their fate as they are grief stricken by it, decides to follow them into death.

[jakkenpoy]

[kalki-tarot]

WHAT'S THEIR PURPOSE IN YOUR LIFE ? 🗝

pick only one picture that resonates the most with you. allow yourself to have an open mind and please only take what resonates as it's a general reading. this reading is only for entertainment purposes and is not 100% correct.

Allow me to tap into your energy, please.

Pile 1

the lovers, 9 of swords, 10 of wands, Temperance

For some of you this could be a love interest, and they are here to teach you the meaning of true & unconditional love. They are here to trigger healing in you, you may feel anxious or your past is suddenly triggered when you talk to this person. They are here for your spiritual growth. Love is Godliness, a feeling closest to god.

You may be twinflames because they trigger each other to heal. You may also be scared of love because it feels new to you, maybe you never received enough love from others and this made you feel bad about yourself. They are here to help you love yourself. It's their purpose to teach you love by triggering unhealed traumas.

You carry lots of baggages, even from your past life. They will help you live freely by releasing all of that and heal your inner child who feels like a burden, but is not. Even though I'm seeing that healing yourself will be a very tough journey, but that's the reason why your soul has incarnated into who you are today, at this moment.

You may have had experiences in your life when people lied to you or betrayed you, even in love you were cheated on. Your higher self is guiding you right now. Please focus on your healing and balancing your karma. They will help you address these wounds and they will also help you connect to your higher self and guides.

Pile 2

2 of pentacles, the fool, two of wands, page of swords

pile 2, your energy is very contradicting and hard to read. You are someone very confused and chaotic in life. You take risks then you immediately regret your life decisions lol. But the person you're asking about will help you with your chaotic energy and scattered behavior.

They are like a portal for you. New doors will be opened in your life through them. So be ready for it! They will help you get out of your inner chaos and explore the outer world more and create a balance between both.

They will go on dates with you. They may act a bit strict sometimes but it's for your betterment. You may not see the good in this right now, but later in life you'll be thankful to have them in your life. They can be a friend or a lover.

An extra thing I'm seeing is that you guys may connect over social media or just text a lot in general. You will make them feel like a child again. I'm also seeing that they will help you regain the lost momentum or control you had over your life.

Pile 3

ace of wands, king of pentacles, strength,the chariot, 9 of cups, 2 pentacles

Some of you could be asking about a mentor or a guide. They can be a spiritual master or a teacher of yours. They are here to provide you guidance and help you develo thinking abilities and skills so that you can manifest opportunities in your life. Or reach your goals.

They are here to provide you support, emotional and physical or even spiritual. They will console you whenever you feel down or sad. You are like their own child. And they deeply connect with you to a spiritual level.

You are someone who is very chaotic amd lacks direction in life. They will probably come into your life in a situation where you are juggling between a lot of things without clarity. They will show you a way out of this world. They will help you create a path and move in proper direction with a sense of clarity. They will also help you get stable in life.

[thatfrailsoul]

(Pictures that are used here are from Pinterest - check the link at the end of the reading to find and download them from their original creator ♡)

_

Slow down for a moment. Allow your heart to guide you, to tell you if there is really a message here for you and in which pile it hides... And whatever the answer is, feel free to listen to it or to let go. Remembering that whenever you will be ready or will have the need, your true message will find its way to you.♡

_

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When they see you, when they look at you... They see the strength of someone who keeps trying, even when every part of them is so tired and consumed. They see the eyes of someone who got through it all, but that still tries to calm down that resentful voice that can't but highlight the worst now in this world... They see someone that tries its best to remain the same gentle and loving soul. While feeling the shift in each part of you that tries to face it all, by becoming rigid and unfazed by all the challenges that you are forced to endure. They see someone who is worthy of that love, affection, and serenity that slowly but finally is flowing in your life again...But they see also someone that can't win completely against their hurt and tortured heart that keeps seeing the danger in disguise in every moment... And they truly would like to help that precious and poor soul of yours. Help you to remember that there is more, that there isn't only darkness, loneliness and cold. And that you deserve a chance to live and feel it. You deserve much much more.

_

They see in you the version of them that they already lost. The reflection of what they once so ardently desired to be, to appear in this world. That strength and courage in learning, from others, from your own self, in seeing not only the hurt and bad in this world, but also all the other beautiful things that can grow from those. Transforming a wound, remains of a destroyed love or dream, in a new beginning, in gained knowledge, in the strength to live for more. They look at you and they are mesmerized, overwhelmed with admiration for you but also regret and judgment for themselves. For the moment they stopped to look around for more convinced that everything that there is - is not worthy anymore. It might not look like it... But every moment with you, every word you speak... It's gentle but still a hard to swallow pill for them about how there was indeed a different way of coming out of all those challenges and nightmares. That there was, there is, still something to live and fight for.

_

Pictures used in the reading ♡

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[rose-colored-tarot]

Me, shuffling my tarot deck: alright buddy, I need help figuring this situation out

*lays out my spread*

My tarot deck:

[canisalbus]

i feel like Machete would be scared/uneasy around dogs if he wasn't one

Not as scared/uneasy as he's around horses, but a little bit, yeah.

He'd be fine with dogs that are quiet, clean and well behaved. Like himself.

[howtofightwrite]

I know DnD is not about realism but how accurate is having, say, your heavy armor wearing paladin have 10 dex or even negative dex? Where medieval knights built like The Rock or like The mountain? I’ve seen youtubers saying that you needed a lot of strength to be able to fight like a knight so women and smaller people couldn’t do it.

I think I know which YouTuber you're talking about, and you can pretty safely ignore them. Their personal misogyny takes priority over their (alleged) expertise when they're forming their arguments.

There's two logistical problems with the idea that you need someone like Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson to make up the bulk of your elite forces. The first problem is that they need to consume a frightening amount of food. This isn't as much of a problem in the modern era, when we have the capacity for truly staggering amounts of agricultural production. But, in a medieval society, with serfs responsible for most of the agriculture, the prospect of feeding each of your elite troops 10,000 calories a day would economically destroy most kingdoms. (And, yes, that is what Björnsson reports to consume on a daily basis. Other estimates place his dietary intake somewhere between 3600 and 8000.) And, to be clear, that is an absolutely absurd amount of food. But, if you want to build that kind of mass, you need a lot of energy, which means, a lot of food.

The second logistical problem is, there's only one of him. Okay, that's not literally true, The Mountain was portrayed by three separate actors, Conan Stevens, a professional wrestler, and Ian Whyte, a stunt actor who had previous appeared as a White Walker in the first season. But, Hafthor Bjornsson took over the role in the fourth season, and is probably who you're thinking of when you name drop the character.

Bjornsson is a member of the 2000 pound club, which include power lifters who can lift over 2000lbs combined between bench press, dead lift, and squats. Not many people ever get that far, and Bjornsson is one of the few individuals who can get into the 1000 pound club from a single lift.

Here's a fun name to know, Becca Swanson is also in the 2000 pound club. She credibly claims that she is the first woman to have achieved that, and I'm not sure if there are any other women in the 2000lb club, but it is achievable.

Now, here's the fun thing about all of this, because you're asking about D&D, and D&D players need to know exactly how much their character can lift. The calculation is (STR*30)lbs. (In the Player's handbook p174.) This also means if you have a real person, and you know how much they can lift in the real world, you can reverse engineer what their strength score would be in D&D.

It's 37.

If you wanted to convert Hafthor Bjornsson into D&D, his strength score would be 37.

Dude can fucking arm wrestle the Terrasque and easily win.

Putting that in perspective, it's a little ludicrous to say that if you want a viable martial character (fighters, paladins, barbarians, etc.), they need a Strength score of 37, when it's not normally possible for player characters to exceed 20 base strength. (If you're wondering, Becca would work out to have ~29 Strength. So, on par with most ancient dragons, and a few gods.)

So, there you have a man and woman who are both superhumanly strong according to D&D.

D&D and math have always had issues like this, and it pops up in a few different places here.

The basic concept that your ability to hit, and the amount of damage you deal is based on strength comes from a very, “schoolyard,” understanding of violence. It's okay to step back and abstract it out, where “strength,” is some amalgam of melee combat aptitude in addition to actual strength, but the idea that being stronger means you can hit harder with a sword or dagger doesn't make a lot of sense. It doesn't even make much sense with axes and maces (the force applied has more to do with the mass and velocity of the weapon, rather than the strength of its wielder.)

A paladin with negative DEX is dead. I don't mean that figuratively, and I do understand what you meant to say, but this rule is a little obscure in 5e. If any of a character's physical attributes (STR, DEX, CON) are reduced to zero, the character immediately dies. Ability draining effects used to be far more common, so the rule existed by itself, though, now it mostly shows up when you're looking at a monster with a physical ability draining attack.

What you probably meant was a negative DEX modifier, meaning your paladin is unusually clumsy. Outside the context of D&D, that would be an incredibly bad thing for a front line combatant. In the specific context of D&D, if they're in heavy armor, it doesn't really matter, if they're in medium, then it reverts to being “a bad thing. Specifically, the rules is that light and medium armor add your DEX modifier to your armor class. Medium armor caps this at +2, but it can go negative with either armor type. However, heavy armor in 5e ignores your DEX modifier entirely.

Now, here's the thing about D&D, its concept of armor is spectacularly weird. Unlike RPGs where armor reduces damage taken, either by subtracting a fixed amount from incoming damage or by reducing damage via a percentage, D&D's system is that your armor class grants you a chance to avoid being hit at all. (5% chance per point of AC, if you're wondering.) Narratively, this is often framed as taking a hit, but your armor turned the blade or something similar. This is because sometimes the enemy attack straight up misses, and that's (usually) determined by your dexterity. This is important, because the game is trying to balance two different power fantasies against each other.

On one side you have the players who want to roll in heavy plate armor, and soak all the hits, and on the other you have players who want to go with light armor, and dodge around enemy attacks. Realistically, that's not an option, but D&D permits it, and again, that's fine. The fantasy of lightly armored fighters makes a lot of sense. I'd even go so far as to say that the barbarian's unarmed defense bonus (where they add CON modifier to their DEX modifier while unarmored) is a really good change in 5e even if it does make no sense objectively. It contributes to the fantasy of this brutal fighter who runs around without armor slapping people silly with their weapons, and shrugging off damage because they're too stubborn to die. In (nearly all cases) the ability to deliver the player fantasy of a class is more important than a strict adherence to reality, and that's fine, that's the point, but the realism of D&D doesn't translate off the page in any meaningful way.

If you wanted a more, “realistic,” (and, yeah, that's incredibly loaded in this context), approach to armor for D&D, I'd say gate access based on your Constitution (or Constitution modifier). Sort of like how your equip load in Dark Souls is based on your Endurance attribute. Give armor and weapons a burden value, and if the combined burden on a character exceeds their CON, the character risks taking levels of Fatigue when they're fighting in heavier gear than they're conditioned to deal with. Maybe add a Conditioning feat or skill if you want to add some other attribute modifiers to the mix should you end up with your heavy armor fighters being underequipped. (Then again, I am one of those psychopaths who really liked the D20 Star Wars' vitality system.) So, ultimately, tinker with the balance until you find something you, and the people at your table, are happy with. Roleplayers who have more meaningful build choices tend to be happier, so long as they don't feel like they're being punished for having a character fantasy.

One of the more amusing descriptions I've read of medieval knights is that they were built like methheads. I can't fully vouch for that, because I'm not an expert on the physical appearance of medieval knights, but it's certainly credible. These guys were eating pretty well for the era, and engaged in a lot of physical activity. Depending on what they were doing, that could easily result in some fairly bulky guys, but it could also result in some wiry looking guys who hide their muscles. Just, knowing what I do about the human body, the answer was probably both, depending on their metabolism and diet. But the image of Sir Methhead, Knight of the Realm, and his implausibly clean teeth, still amuses me.

It's worth remembering that a lot of the times I've seen someone say, “they were built like athletes,” they'll drop an image of a bodybuilder. No. That's not what you would get. Bodybuilding is designed to create its own physique, one that doesn't occur unless you're abusing your body in some very specific (and unhealthy) ways. It's probably better to think of someone like a high-school football player. Bulky, but without the carved physiques of a Boris Vallejo painting. (If you don't know who that is, look up his art. It is a bit dated, but it's gorgeous.)

Alternately, if you do want your characters to look like those paintings, it is your fantasy, have fun.

-Starke

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[fuckyeahcoelacanths]

thoughts on the coelacanth yugioh card? I keep one of these in my phone case lol

[goldenpinof]

why did Dan blush SO hard at Phil saying "cum" 😭 like the card was not that offensive...

i think he just... loved it too much

[egophiliac]

thank you for blessing us with twst pokemon au i appreciate it greatly. if i may ask you a question

how does one read book 7 without selling their soul to the deep dark web. i've been wanting to read the other parts for a while but i can't find a place with all the chapters. i've seen translations on youtube but i don't think they have all of them?

(also why'd you government name mickey like that on your last post what did he do)

thank you! :D

I'm not really sure where to find up-to-date main story translations, so opening it up to the floor for other people to chime in! for reference, the latest release in JP was episode 7 chapter 6 on December 11th, which covered 7-88 through 7-100. fingers crossed for more in February...but that's where we're at right now!

(Michael knows what he did)

[rontra]

how she looks with tower and reversed temperance in her spread

this was a diverted joke (decided to save the actual idea for something else) so i rerouted into that one post i adore. good luck girl

[bunnyjesters]

i like ur hcs but jax absolutely does not drink whiskey. the guy is 22 he is drinking smirnoff ice and buzzballs

sighing because you’re right, how could i be so blind