#and this could all just be because 1. i watched lone star more recently

[lily-blue-blue-lily]

im finally completely caught up on 911 and ive only got a few episodes of lone star left and i think... i think, controversially, maybe i now prefer lone star ...

[twst-megane]

So I recently just finished Book 5 and I need y’all to know Vil is like my top fav even before starting book 1 and I just ended up loving him more even now and how so much care and knowledge was written to create such a layered and complex character

I’m not that good in gathering my thoughts into posts like this but I just wanted to share my thoughts cuz I genuinely love the writing in Book 5 as of now :3

BOOK 5 SPOILERS KINDA

1. Envy

The baseline that drove to Vil into overblot. How his desire to play the hero and be on stage longer, his inner envy towards Neige, it accumulated so much from childhood till now and to the point of almost potentially killing Neige but I personally don’t think it was the main reason for his OB

2. Reflection

I’m going off by the official ENG translation but I really love his line before overblotting, “Don’t look at me with those eyes”

He knew what he was going to do if Rook hadn’t stopped him and he immediately regretted it, he became the role he detested for all those years and he hated himself even more for it, he couldn’t forgive himself, which I feel is the real reason he OB compared to a simple jealousy buildup over the years and wanting to be the best. I really like this route more as someone with intrusive thoughts during my worst, it’s a horrible feeling when you realised the horrible things you thought of and the thought of acting it.

3. Loneliness

The higher your power, the lonelier you become.

I feel like this can be said for like every housewarden but I’ve rarely seen ppl talk about this aspect regarding Vil. He couldn’t star in hero roles because he was TOO perfect and beautiful that an average person couldn’t relate, it’s the complete opposite to the rest of the housewardens where they were lonely due to being inferior/intimidating which is an interesting thing to spin the loneliness part onto Vil really well.

He didn’t even appear to have any close friends since childhood, I don’t think he’d consider Jack or Neige to be his close friends but more like at a distance due to how far Vil is in most things. But I don’t think loneliness is the main point of his overall character or trauma but it’s an interesting aspect to consider especially when fitting with the rest of the housewardens.

4. Jamil and Vil Parallels

It’s really funny Jamil shares almost the exact same thoughts as Vil and it brings me back to my second point considering both Jamil and Vil have someone they consider to be superior than them being the most pure and kindhearted person (Kalim and Neige). It’s even more interesting Kalim was the one that escalated the OB and not Jamil from the previous pattern of OB characters escalating the next char into OB. Book 5 expanded a lot on Kalim as a character and he never makes the same mistake twice once he learns which is why it was heartwarming he saw the same eyes Jamil made in Vil’s and tries to stop him.

Bonus :

Rook constantly being the observer in the background and always watching out for Vil really warms my heart, even if its for the good, he always thinks the good for Vil specifically. He saved Neige but only cuz he knows Vil isn’t that sort of person. He cares so much about him he’s so sweet.

I really love love love how they touched on how being an actor can make you be perceived. As a kid you’re very impressionable towards specifically live action actors playing a certain character because your brain would find it hard to find a separation between actor and character and could even paint one as a villain in real life. It has happened before and it’s still a thing now so I really love they added this in even if Vil doesn’t seem to be too bothered by it but it minimally added a little fuel to the fire on why he hated the roles as a villain.

Anyway I really love Vil as a character I can dissect him forever nobody can make me hate him I love him so much 😭😭😭

[carlos-in-glasses]

10 Questions for Writers

Thank you for the tag @orchidscript @heartstringsduet @rmd-writes

@freneticfloetry @reyesstrand @safeaswrites @paperstorm ❤️

how many works do you have on ao3? — 26! My most recent, Keep the Lights On, just went up at the weekend.

what’s your total ao3 word count? — Not including the fic I collaborated on, it's roughly 451k.

what fandoms do you write for? — Only Tarlos/Tarlos adjacent. I wonder if I'll ever be moved to write for another fandom someday (as well as Tarlos, rather than instead of) but right now I can't even imagine it.

do you respond to comments? why or why not? — Yes! It's vital for me to thank readers. People are taking time out of their day to read something I wrote...it's amazing. It blows my mind. Before fic, I was writing into a void and didn't realise how much I needed this sort of community. I'm just really grateful for it.

have you ever had a fic stolen? — Yes, chunks of one. It was a harrowing experience. The Lone Star fandom was incredible about it though. Not to vague but there are certain people here who are my heroes. (Also...the amount of 'yes' answers I've seen to this question really scares me!)

have you ever cowritten a fic before? — Yes! Just once, but I'd love to collaborate more! @lemonlyman-dotcom and @ladytessa74 and I each wrote a chapter for a fic called The Wonder of It for @thisbuildinghasfeelings' birthday. It was a really lovely, fun experience. The fic is one I treasure because it's within Tessa's Elijah Verse, which I'm obsessed with.

what’s your all-time favorite ship? — Tarlos. There is no other ship for me that comes close. Sometimes I wonder if there ever could be tbh. I'm not actively looking for one, but I wasn't actively looking for Tarlos either. Grateful every day that I randomly watched this Rob Lowe Vanity Fair video that changed my life.

what are your writing strengths? — Based on feedback I've had, I'll say: humour, smut, detail, lyricism.

what are your writing weaknesses? — Well according to a total shithead on here, my smut and everything else. But according to me I'd say overwriting, syntax, using the same words really close together ffs. I spend *a lot* of time editing before I post. I'd also love to write a really good thriller but I don't know if I have the skill.

first fandom you wrote for? — 9-1-1 Lone Star/ Tarlos. First and only, babyyy.

Tagging @lemonlyman-dotcom @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @ladytessa74 @welcometololaland

@pimento-playing-hopscotch @alrightbuckaroo @goodways @bonheur-cafe

@ironheartwriter @tellmegoodbye @lightningboltreader @strandnreyes

@theghostofashton

[tellmegoodbye]

Tag Game: Grief

Thank you @lonestar-s5countdown for the questions and thank you @bonheur-cafe @strandnreyes @literateowl @reyesstrand and @decafdino for tagging me!

---

(1) Which character death in 911 Lone Star hit you the hardest?

In terms of shock and the events in the aftermath, it had to be Gabriel. Watching Carlos break down the way he did, seeing how differently he dealt with his grief compared to the way TK shut down after Gwyn's death, it had me crying until the very end.

However, I think I cried the most after Charles' death. One Day is one of those episodes I always come back to because it's just guaranteed to make me cry. Seeing Tommy hold it together all episode only to finally break down in the end? Seeing the way Grace and Judd fall apart when they put the pieces together while watching Tommy's kids? I don't think any character death is topping the way this one broke me.

(2) What is your favorite grief-related moment in the show?

There's so many! Tommy's grief group. Owen and Andrea talking about Gwyn and Gabriel before the wedding, even if that was a deleted scene. Everyone dealing with their grief surrounding Tim's death in their own way in 2x02. Tommy finally breaking down in 2x13. Owen's talk with Carlos about obsession.

My favorite probably has to be Owen's dream in 3x18. He's been carrying around so much guilt and trauma up until that point and it's been eating him alive, but he was finally able to see that continuing to hold onto that guilt isn't helping him. It's hurting him. In a way, he was finally able to let go of a lot of things (his brother's death, his family falling apart, 9/11, the mistakes he made with TK, Gwyn's death, etc) which is one of the hardest steps to take in the grief process. It doesn't mean he'll forget, it just means he can move forward and live with a little more peace in his heart.

(3) Do you think there will be a character death in season 5? If so, any guesses about who it might be?

If there is, I don't think it would be any of the main characters. A minor character death can be impactful in many different ways though, and I wouldn't put it past lone star to kill off someone we would least expect, so we'll see!

(4) Which living character's death would destroy you the most?

Probably Owen. I say that because killing off TK or Carlos is just not an option and I think we're all in agreement that they're off limits. Owen's death would make a lot of sense at some point down the line. After he's finally found the peace he's been looking for and gets to see his son thrive in his job and with his soulmate. Once Owen has nothing left to worry about, killing him off would make a lot of sense and still be devastatingly tragic at the same time.

(5) Which character's childhood trauma do you think was most significant in shaping them?

All of these characters have such unique backgrounds that it's kind of hard to try and compare traumas (and that's not something I like to do) so instead I'm going to say in terms of time, it would be Owen. His trauma has been accumulating longer than most of the rest of these characters have been alive, and the longer you live with something without properly dealing with it, the more it will bring you down. You could also say Judd because like Owen, he has a lot of childhood guilt and trauma as well as some recent trauma. It makes sense why these two ended up being such close friends. They understand each other in that sense.

---

Open tag because a lot of people have done this already!

[actuallysara]

Rafael Silva and Ronen Rubinstein for Out Magazine

Fortunately, out actors Ronen Rubinstein and Rafael Silva have the chemistry to bring these two Lone Star boys to life.

“I can’t imagine doing this with somebody that (a) you don’t like and (b) you don’t mesh well with on set,” Rubinstein says of Silva. Since they started this journey as Tarlos when Lone Star premiered in 2020, the two have grown close as both colleagues and friends. “I can’t imagine doing that with somebody that you don’t get along with and you don’t respect and you don’t love as a human being,” he adds. “I can honestly say that’s how I feel about Rafael.”

“Ro and I are just so fucking different as people…. But it’s this sort of yin and yang thing,” says Silva. “Two of the same pieces of the same puzzle are not going to go together, they’re just not. They have to be different in order to complement each other, and I think we do that very well as actors and as people.”

One of the first scenes the two shot together was a sex scene, and like with any intimacy on camera, that required a lot of trust — even if at the time, they had just recently met. But the two used their real-life newness with each other to their advantage, as it paralleled how T.K. and Carlos were also just getting to know each other, creating a realistic pairing that the stans simply can’t get enough of.

“At that point, when you have a bunch of people just watching you make out and do that, you have to rely on your partner,” Silva says. “It’s like we only got each other right now, so let’s just do whatever happens here, just go with the flow. Let’s just go.”

Though they didn’t have much representation growing up, Silva and Rubinstein are elated by how many people are touched by Tarlos. “It’s really all over the world right now, it’s unbelievable,” Rubinstein reflects. “I’d be lying to you if I said, ‘Yeah, of course I knew it would be like this,’ or ‘Yeah, I expected it.’ First of all, just for this storyline to even be birthed, it is so risky. Especially for a network like Fox. If it wasn’t for [creators] Ryan Murphy and Tim Minear, it wouldn’t be possible, and it’s still shocking me to this day.”

What was also shocking for Silva and Rubinstein (in a good way) was getting to see just how much love fans were ready to give in real life, as the two got to meet Tarlos stans over the summer at the Dream It Not at Home convention in Paris.

“We met a lot of people saying, ‘I’ve been saving money to come here, I’ve been working overtime,’ so all I could hear was, ‘I’ve been putting in effort in order to see you,’” Silva says of the experience. “When you hear that, you feel the responsibility to also take them in.”

And they’re not taking any of that love and support lightly. With season 4 of Lone Star on the horizon, and with more Tarlos promised to viewers after a breathtaking proposal scene at the end of season 3, Silva and Rubinstein are more committed than ever to nailing their parts as authentically as possible. And they can’t wait for fans to see what season 4 has in store.

“Right off from episode 1, we’re going to find out some things that are funny, but it propels on to several beautiful episodes after the first one, and it’s going to be intense,” Silva says. “It’s going to be fun to watch and fun to do. Like what Ronen said, you can’t really expect much because things change a lot. Whatever you think is going to happen, Tim always brings something better than what your imagination can perceive. I think the fun part is just waiting to find out what actually happens.”

“I’ve definitely been shocked and surprised already within the first couple episodes. There’s definitely been some storylines where I’m like, ‘What?’” Rubinstein says. “It’s hard to predict what’s going to happen on the show, especially with us, so that’s been really cool. It keeps you on your toes, and when I get a script, I’m literally flipping through the pages as fast as I can because at any moment, there could be a bombshell — and we’re definitely going to have a couple this season.”

“The biggest thing is all paths lead to the wedding,” Rubinstein adds.

[rianafying]

had a rlly rough start to today. was up by 9:30 which is a decent time to wake up, considering my sleep schedule has been as over the place this week. i woke up to a text from someone i worked with recently pointing out a mistake i had made, and as awful as it initially made me feel, i gathered myself, apologised and explained the situation etc. i felt terrible, like i do when even the slightest thing goes wrong. i’m always anticipating failure anyway, and besides i knew about the mistake, it just that it’s mostly beyond my control. i have very limited resources. anyway, yeah they responded by saying this doesn’t affect us working together and that he’s more than interested in continuing to work with me, just that he thought it was important to discuss so we could have it in mind moving forward, which i really appreciate. but the part in me that loves to be anxious and think the worst of myself, is trying to take this opportunity to make me sink back into a spiral, but i know it’s not that deep, people make mistakes, and it has already been resolved. i don’t need to worry about it. worry is my worst enemy. even things that shouldn’t cause concern make me sweat from concern. i can’t take it easy i can’t sit back and relax, i live inside a personal hell. there is no rest from this madness. i need a fucking break. i’m exhausted. from the moment i wake up to crying myself to sleep and even in sleep i have nightmares everyday, i wake up exhausted from being anxious in my sleep all night. for the past few years i have been exhausted, i have been feeling like i’m going crazy. i am going crazy. oh god there’s so much stuff. i feel as if i will never see success in my career, i will never be independent, i will never recover from my past, i will never see peace and safety, i feel like i will spend my whole life worrying and grieving and suffering, even in my deathbed, i’ll be plagued with anxiety. and im so lonely, not in a i don’t have friends way, i do have amazing friends, but im lonely in the way that everyone is lonely sometimes. in the way that in this world we have ourselves. lonely in the way that nobody will know exactly what it’s like to live how i live, feel what i feel, or what i’m thinking. nobody will understand me the way i do, and i have to use my words to communicate it, to try to bridge the gap between language and reality, between the outside and my insides. and yet in a way, everything is the same, everyone who has ever lived has had feelings. i’m doing the best i can. everyone is. i guess. in their own twisted way. it’s too early to call anyone and i find that im very dishonest about my feelings via text as opposed to how vulnerable i am when im speaking over a call. i pretend to be happy and fine, for two reasons, 1) i try to fake it till i make it, 2) not to cause unnecessary trouble or concern.

i just got offered a gig on the 22nd, but it’ll be 42 degrees that day, i’ll actually die of a heatstroke because that studio doesn’t have air conditioning. i don’t know what to do. i know ill have a flare up but i hate not being able to go or having to turn down gigs.

okay wtf look at what the costar app just sent me:

that is so insane. co star is crazy for this fr. they always send me something so related to my day. jesus. almost makes you think astrology is real.

anyway yeah, so i have a lot to do but ill probably end up watching tv and buying unnecessary groceries today. which is honestly a perfectly normal thing to do when on holiday. i’ll try not to feel guilty about it.

[hyperionshipping]

What are your general thoughts on the series of doctor who you've watched so far?

HEHEHEHE

Gonna try to generalize these!! Soit won't be AS long. Also. Apologies for mixing series together. If I mention something for the wrong series you don't see it. Okay? Okay.

Series 1:

OH MY GODDDS OH MY GOD. SERIES ONE. I'm so sorry I skipped you when I first started. I would've been a whole different person I think had 11 not been my first doctor. However!! I appreciate it now so, so much.

Nine was only there for Series 1 but GOD did he give it his all. I've been thinking a lot recently about "Just this once Rose! Everybody lives!"

Series 2:

The start of Ten... ohh Ten. I get why he's a fan favorite. Especially after watching it. Sassy little thing he is!! He bounced off of Rose so well.

I think it's a shame we didn't see more of him with Harkness. It's fun knowing the Doctor found him weird to look at. But also. He had to have felt guilty right? Right???

And also. K9 8). I like K9. I liked seeing an old companion and the Doctor get *so* excited.

Series 3:

As above. I really do enjoy 10's run. Absolutely a blast. Absolutely fucking killer of my heart at Rose. His Rose.

I almost wish we'd see Tentoo and Rose again. Just once. Just a peek. I know he still thinks of her. We know she was his humanity.

Series 4:

DONNA. NOBLE.

Dear God!!!!!! Donna Noble!!!!!!!! You guys weren't KIDDING about Donna. Oh my God I would've done anything for more of Ten and Donna. Absolutely the best Doctor she could've been paired with.

(This series actually inspired a DW OC for me bc of The Library! Fun fact!)

Her story ending too was so.

Donna Noble. You're perfect. You're smart. You know so much. Even now, the stars sing your name and every Ood knows your tale. You'll never be forgotten.

Series 5:

*CRASHING THROUGH A DOOR* EVERYONE THATS 11! THAT'S MY DAD OF ALL DADS REGARDING THE DOCTOR. HES THE ONE THAT SPIKES MY CODEPENDENCY THROUGH THE ROOF.

I really really REALLY love 11. I have full bias as he was MY Doctor. MY first. Rewatching Series 5 was still such an enjoyable experience.

One of my favorite things about 11 and his run in general but you really see it in the first few episodes is just how *different* he is from both 10 and 9. Of course each Doctor is a new person relatively speaking but the jump from 10 to 11 is SO BIG. They're truly so different and I think it works SO amazingly.

It also brought one of my all time favorite episodes!!! Amy's choice. Oh my God do I love Amy's choice.

I also love Amy. The Girl Who Waited. Amelia Pond. Little, lonely Amelia Pond and her Raggedy Doctor.

Series 6:

Moffat really went HAM on the horror aspect of dw in the latter half of series 5 iirc and episodes of series 6. I know many people don't enjoy his writing but I honestly LOVED it. There was one episode I disliked heavily. The one episode with Hitler in the cabinet because it was just.... So fucking stupid to me.

The story truly could've been told in ANY other way with ANYONE else.

The dollhouse episode sticks out to me as well. Just for the visuals of it and how well the writing does show not tell.

Another amazing episode I wish we could've focused on more was the hotel. 11's door being labeled 11... him knowing what was behind it. Oh so many questions....

Series 7:

I can't truly comment on this one yet. I'm not done it. So far it IS enjoyable. I'm having fun but... I don't know if like Clara yet. I don't know the fandoms general vibe on her (? I think I've seen people say she works better with 12?) but as of right now she's... Fine.

You can't beat Rory and Amy. You just can't. It's hard filling a Doctor's past companions shoes and I don't think it always works.

But!! I'm only a couple episodes into it really. I'm not done yet. I barely know her story! She could absolutely grow on me. Much like Nine did 8)!

[meowmageddon]

August Reading Check-In!

Is it a little late? Yes, mind your business 😹

I want to move my bookish updates back here since I'm not about training Elon Musk's AI. This update is gonna be a mix of mini-reviews, the current reading list, recent acquisitions, and a few upcoming releases to watch out for.

It's gonna be long, so keep reading if you dare. Or jump around to the bits you like!

Mini Reviews for July's Reads

Black Ghost of Empire by Kris Manjapra - 5 stars

A look at slavery and the emancipation processes across North America and the Caribbean in particular, as well as some of the colonization of Africa itself. Examines the way emancipations prioritized compensating slave-owners for lost "property" rather than restoring justice and reciprocity to the enslaved people who lost their labor, lives, and histories. Super informative, super vital, because they didn't teach this in US history. Just be prepared for an emotionally tough read.

The Veiled Throne by Ken Liu (The Dandelion Dynasty #3) - 3 stars

This is where the series finally ran into pacing issues for me, as many multi-POV epic fantasy series do. Mostly in the latter half. We had a very high-stakes storyline getting a slim chapter between multiple thick chapters about an all new setting and characters with a much lighter tone. I know heavy stuff needs to be broken up, but this was more frustrating than cathartic.

I am keeping in mind that TVT is technically the first half of what was supposed to be the final book, but the trilogy became a tetralogy because a 2000-page book would be ludicrous. Still, I feel it could've been broken down further, and we really need to allow more BIPOC writers the freedom to have sweeping, several-book-long series the way white authors can.

Get In Trouble by Kelly Link - 4 stars

These stories were quite a ride. Many featured messy people, places, and things. If we're being honest, the rating could bump up to 5 stars on a reread. There's just so much to unpack, and I'd need a closer reading, like studying scripture.

Current August Reads

• Trans-Galactic Bike Ride ed. by Lydia Rogue - As the subtitle reads, it's "Feminist Bicycle Science Fiction Stories of Transgender and Nonbinary Adventurers," written by queer authors. Technically I've actually already finished reading it, but I'll post about it separately at a later time!

• Babel by R.F. Kuang - BookTube's darling about a department at Oxford dedicated to translation and working silver- and translation-based magic for the glory of the empire. Problem is, some of the students and faculty are people from places on the receiving end of the empire's injustice. Down to the last 100 pages of this one!

• Speaking Bones by Ken Liu (The Dandelion Dynasty #4) - Despite my frustrations with the third book's pacing, I wouldn't dream of DNFing the series. The world is so lush and full, and the characters endearing. But there's another 1000 pages ahead, so this'll be on Current Reads lists for a while. 💀

• Lone Women by Victor LaValle - A young woman leaves her family home in flames and seeks a new life homesteading in Montana, a mysterious trunk in tow. I read LaValle's The Ballad of Black Tom a few years back, and really needed to read more of his stuff.

• Moonshot: The Indigenous Comics Collection Vol. 1 ed. by Hope Nicholson - Was very excited to see this at the library, as I've wanted to read it for a long time. The stories vary in genre, and I believe there are illustrated stories, individual art pieces, and even a song or poem by Buffy Sainte-Marie in addition to regular comics.

Recent Acquisitions

• Loot by Tania James - I actually won this print copy in a Goodreads giveaway! This is why I encourage those who are able to enter for anything they're interested in; it can happen to YOU lmao. Anyways, it's a book about a boy in India who constructs an automaton tiger for the Sultan, only to have it seized in war by the British. He goes to England to try to retrieve it.

• Vampires of El Norte by Isabel Cañas - My August Book of the Month pick. I enjoyed her debut, The Hacienda, and look forward to this one. Described with "Vampires and vaqueros face off on the Texas-Mexico border." I've seen reviewers describe it more as magial realism/historical fiction with vampires, rather than horror, though.

Upcoming Releases

No guarantee I'll pick these up... but here's some cool stuff coming out in the next month or so!

• From A Certain Point of View: Return of the Jedi (August 29th) - Third collection of 40 short stories celebrating the 40th anniversary of Star Wars, this time inspired by elements of Return of the Jedi! I realized I still have to pick up the second collection, from The Empire Strikes Back, oh no!

• The Spirit Bares Its Teeth by Andrew Joseph White (September 5th) - YA horror featuring a trans autistic teen protagonist who can commune with the dead. He attempts to escape an arranged marriage, is sent to a Sanitorium & Finishing School, and is urged by the institution's ghosts to expose its dark secrets.

That's all for now! If you read all this... just know that I love you. 🥰

[inbtswethrrust]

MINDHEIST MASTERLIST

Hey guys! I've recently received some asks regarding mindheist deleting their ao3 account, along with all the works. Someone was kind enough to send me pdf files for all of the works published on ao3 by mindheist, and so here is a compilation for all of them with the links for the files!! Enjoy your reading. By the way, if at any point the writer themself would like me to delete this post, I will.

So the post doesn't get too long, i'll put up a divider! Happy readings!

JIKOOK:

The Ocean at the End of the Universe It's hard to find just one person in a sea of stars. (space au)

Wish I Would've Known The worst part isn't hatred. The worst part is not talking anymore, and never understanding why. (based on the song we don't talk anymore)

You're My Genie, Lamborghini (You're My Teeny Weeny Meenie) You know those people saying technology is driving people apart? Yeah, fuck them. (twitter au)

with it's sequel... You Got the Best of Me (Synth Riff) Two social media sweethearts get married. Baby boomers crash and burn in the distance at this flagrant display of millenial culture. (continuation of ^^)

JINMIN:

Galaxy S♡ we all have those memories that don't end, even when everything is over. Some call that critical error. Others call it human existence. (androids/robots au)

Watchers of the Eternal Flame Jimin goes to Rio de Janeiro to live his passion. He leaves Rio da Janeiro having found his dream. (summer olympics au)

NAMGI:

In My Blood Sometimes fate is a flat tire and a crushed bumper. (a/b/o au)

TAEKOOK:

i try to picture me without you (but i can't) "You think relationships last in the village? You want one with me? You think you'll be happy?" Maybe Taehyung did think that they could be happy. (sequel to Watchers of the Eternal Flame, summer olympics au)

And, Home (Will Feel Like Home Again) Between the oily residue of night market tables and the rickety steps of the Hakone mountains, there is a little bus station in the fog. (travel au)

Fool Me Once (Shame On You) Fool me twice, shame on me. (established relationship)

Ghost Story It was an untold story with no ending, until now. (ghost au)

Invisible People The most important things are the hardest of all to see. (ballet au)

Let Us A relationship is a two-way street. (strangers to friends to lovers)

Never Let Me Go Sometimes, reaching out and taking someone's hand is the beginning of a journey. (soulmates au)

Pour Up (Drank) If you can read this, take another shot. (frat au)

Rich Bitch When you make six figures a year, Valentino isn’t that big of a deal. (the au is,,, tae is rich)

Shark In the Water As far as fairy tales go, this one doesn’t have a lot of faeries. Tales, yes. Tails, that is. Just the one. One (1) tail. (mermaid au)

Terrible Things Happen (Sometimes, They Save You) Min Yoongi wakes up from a nightmare on a sunless afternoon to a reality more twisted than his dizziest daydreams. (american horror story au)

The Day The Earth Stood Still Somewhere in New York, Seoul, Florence, Los Angeles, is a tale as old as time. (pre-apocalypse au)

起死回生; To Live Again Fiction gives us a second chance that life denies us. (historical au)

SERIES: I'm feeling electric tonight

(fake dating au.)

Kiss Me Hard Before You Go Dramatization. Do not try at home.

I Just Wanted You to Know (That Baby, You’re the Best) If you experience headaches, nausea, or heartbreak, discontinue use and talk to your doctor because relationships might not be right for you.

Think I'll Miss You Forever Happy endings sold separately.

SERIES: Interstellar (historical fantasy au)

Give Me Your Hands (I Will Pick the Stars for You) I miss you like the moon misses the sun, destined to chase you until the end of time.

Perihelion Perihelion: the point in the orbit of a celestial body at which it is closest to the sun.

SERIES: Moonrise (werewolf au, abo au)

Bad Moon Rising Taehyung has always wanted to be a superhero. Jeongguk has always been a supernatural.

I Fear the Fever, It Runs Electric There are some perks to having Jeongguk as a boyfriend. For one, he makes procrastination impossible.

Shaking Inside My Bones For better or for worse, everyone gets better at this. It’s practice. It doesn’t quite make perfect but it gets pretty damn close.

SERIES: The Ones Who Watch Us (horror au)

They Can See Us There are two things that you should hope always follow you. Number one: your shadow. Number two: your reflection.

Why Aren't You Scared of Me? (What Do You Know?) There are much worse things to be scared of.

SERIES: Where You Go, I'll Go To (grim reaper au)

In the Blind The world, as most people see it, is only half the story.

Time would envy us (part two, by nikkumeul) This is the other half of the story. This is forever. OBS: same link as above, starting from page 26)

SERIES: You bring good to my lonely life (honestly) (hollywood movie star au)

Love Will Always Be A Lesson (Let’s Get Out of its Way) Lesson 1: It's not real

Pizza Magazine Love is a strange, strange thing. (OBS: same link, starting from page 156)

YOONKOOK:

We Who Hide From the Sun “It’s the oldest story in the world. One day you’re seventeen and planning for someday. And then, quietly, and without you ever really noticing, someday is today. And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.” (childhood friends to lovers au)

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Admin's Note:

Okay, i'm back now. these are all the mindheist fics i've gotten the links for, thank you to all who sent them to me, very much appreciated! the links lead you to a pdf file on google drive, owned by my own account. i'll have those up all the time, but in case something happens and they get removed i advise you to download the ones that you want to keep personally! hope you enjoy the read babies, love you all!! and thank you again!! and thank you to mindheist in the first place for writing all of these amazing fics.

[crowleywowley]

The Arrangement | Part 1

Din Djarin x female reader

Ratings/warnings: mentions/implications of adult activity, minors still need to skedaddle tho this will get spicy eventually

Tags: This is a very self indulgent royaltycore + friends to lovers + slow burn situation. It’s an au (obvi) where Din and the reader are both from royal families on Mandalore, and as such have been set up in an arranged marriage to each other, but it’s fine because they only see each other platonically….right? Hehehehe>:)

A/N: this is my first time writing din, so please be nice because I am very sensitive and trying my best OKAY also don’t come at me for the mix of Star Wars culture and royal jargon. It’s my au and I’ll mix if I want to!

Chapter 1: Sundari Afternoons

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“I don’t ever want to be married.”

The older boy looked up from the book he’d been engrossed in. “Why do you say that?”

You let go of the branch you’d previously been grasping, unceremoniously dropping to your feet with a thud. “It’s simply gross,” you replied shortly. “All the kissing and dancing and holding hands.

With a sigh, you settled in next to him against the rough, bumpy trunk of the Veshok tree where it lined the edges of the palace. A squint crossed your face as the sun hit your eyes, previously shaded during your attempted ascension.

“I would rather go off on my own adventures, be all by myself. I don’t need a husband to do that, he’d get in my way.”

Din set the book to his side, a small smile pulling at his lips. “Can I come on the adventures too? You might get lonely.”

You paused for a moment, considering the request.

“Only if you don’t make me kiss you.”

•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•

“My lady?” A voice pulled you from your thoughts. “Did you hear me? I said you’re all done, you’re free to go,”

Miri, one of the palace tailors, smiled meekly up at you where you stood on a small riser.

Though the dark haired girl was several years your junior, her expertise was beyond her years due to her training from her mother, Madera. Many hours had been spent with the kind older woman and her daughter in this room over the years, an array of fabrics and textures and pins strewn about as they fussed with whatever garment they’d chosen to focus on in the moment. Madera had become a member of the family in her own right, creating some of the best fashion moments for you and your sister, but more importantly had offered more maternal advice than you could ever wish for. All this to say watching her health gradually decline over the last several years until she was unable to work and seeing Miri step into her shoes was a difficult and tall order.

Still, Miri had taken on her mother’s duties gracefully, and stood in her place now as she helped you unzip from the dress she’d been hemming.

“Miri, there truly isn’t any need for the title, I’m only six years older than you.” You told her, carefully stepping out of the gown before moving to return to the clothes you’d been wearing prior to the fitting.

She bent to gather up the dress and place it back on its hanger. “Forgive me, just a force of habit I think. You know how my mother is about manners.”

A smile rose to your face. “That’s very true,” you said with a breathy laugh as you fastened a periwinkle skirt adorned with eyelet detailing at the bottom, along with a white linen shirt that you’d pulled on that morning. Both items were courtesy of Miri- though her duties were technically only palace-event related, she enjoyed trying out different designs and techniques for creating outfits, and you enjoyed her company (as well as wasting time), so you’d recently been receiving several outfits from the younger girl as warmer weather approached.

You turned back to face her. “The dress looks sublime. You have outdone yourself.”

“It’s the first royal wedding I’ve been a part of, I want it to be perfect,” she stepped back to admire her work, the look of pride that she tried to stifle not going unnoticed by you.

Pushing down the wave of jumbled thoughts that threatened to take over your brain at the mention of the wedding, you placed a hand on her shoulder. “It is perfect. Thank you, Miri.”

You turned to leave the small room but stopped briefly in the doorway, taking a last look at the long white gown before it was zipped back into its protective bag.

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The Sundari Palace halls seemed particularly busy today, much to Din Djarin’s chagrin. He wanted nothing more than to get out to the edge of the property near the forest line-also known as his unofficial shooting range-and do some basic blaster work, yet it seemed the world was against him in this endeavor.

In what should’ve been a five minute walk from his chambers to his destination, the man had been stopped once by an overzealous guard- a new hire, he guessed- who was insistent on congratulating him on his recently graduation from the Mandalore Militia Academy, a second time by someone he presumed to be involved with the upcoming festivities, whom he had no interest in assisting, and a third when he’d bumped into one of the bath house staff that wouldn’t let him apologize for doing so.

All this in addition to several detours in order to avoid the eyes of giggling chambermaids and kitchen workers roaming about. No less than ten minutes passed and a considerably longer than necessary path taken, he finally found himself approaching the tree line- only to see a figure laying on a blanket exactly where he was headed.

As he approached, he quickly recognized said figure and lowered his hackles a bit.

“My lady, you could not have picked a more inconvenient spot to sun yourself.”

You removed the arm that had been draped over your eyes to take in the sudden disturbance to your rest. “Don’t you know it is my goal in life to cause you problems?” You replied shortly.

Din watched as you laid your arms back across your eyes. A sigh left his mouth before he sat down next to you, his chest plate catching the sun a bit. “A bit testy today, I see. Care to share what’s on your mind?”

Once again you removed the arm covering your face and sat up on your elbows. “Do you really want to know, or do you just want me to talk about it so I’ll get up and let you have your target practice?”

“Both.”

Now it was your turn to sigh. “Just..wedding stuff, I suppose. It’s all coming up a bit too fast for me to handle.”

That, Din could relate to. It was all anyone seemed to care about in the palace, and despite the ceremony taking place in more than five months, preparations had long been under way. It was not something he particularly cared about- in fact, he found himself actively avoiding anything to do with it.

He hummed in response. “It has caused quite a stir around the palace. I can’t say I understand why.”

“Well, it is the first wedding in Sundari in about twenty standard years,” you rolled over onto your side. “I just wish it wasn’t mine- or really, ours, I should say. I feel like I finished school yesterday and got no time to care about anything else before jumping into all this,”

Din looked down at you as you spoke. “You and I both.”

A comfortable silence fell over the two of you and you laid back down. This had been commonplace since you were children; you usually had a lot to say, while Din preferred staying quiet, and though that could be perceived to an untrained eye as his disinterest, you knew he was simply listening and observing. As you’d grown up, you’d been trained into a more reserved disposition, a more lady-like one. With those closer ones such as your sister, and now Din as you rekindled your friendship, that less restrained side of yourself was allowed to show. Din hadn’t changed much on his front, though you didn’t mind. It was a nice change of pace from the constant barrage of meetings, trainings, and various other duties where you were constantly talked at rather than to.

After a few moments had passed, you opened your eyes again and turned your head to the man. “So, what could be on your agenda for the afternoon? Anything of interest?” You asked, picking at the soft grass in front of you.

Din shook his head. “Just wanted to practice my shooting.”

Though his tone was blunt, you could detect that whisper of a joking in there.

You let out a short laugh. “Alright, alright. I hear you. I’ll leave you be.” You stood and gathered the small blanket you’d been laying on. “Aren’t you going to ask me about my plans before I leave?”

Looking up at you with squinted eyes and a slight scrunch in his nose, a short sigh left his mouth once again. “I wasn’t going to, but I’m sure you’re going to tell me regardless.”

“Well since you’re clearly begging to know,” you dusted off the back of your skirt. “I am meeting Kelsin for a picnic.” You told in a light tone.

Din nodded. “Ah, Kelsin. I didn’t know you were still hanging around him.”

You frowned slightly. “I am not ‘hanging around’ him, we are meeting for a picnic! He’s sweet, and he makes me laugh. He’s enjoyable company.”

“Yes, it’s his company that you enjoy.”

Din was not necessarily incorrect in this loaded statement, as flustered as it made you. Kelsin Ardan was a nice, simple man of a notably lower royal stature that you’d met in your time at the Mandalore Academic Excellency Institute. This is to say, he is very much not supposed to be on your radar.

In your late-night, trying-to-fall-asleep-musings, you supposed you’d marry the tawny haired boy in another life. He wasn’t what one would call… a great thinker, per say, but he was nice to be around, easy enough to look at, and would likely be a good father to your fake children from the scenarios in which you envisioned the two of you. That was not how the fates would have it for you, however; your hand in marriage was not your own. To compensate for this, you stole moments with him when you could, not dissimilar to the one you were planning for the afternoon. Not dissimilar to any of the ones you’d stolen in the past either, both with Kelsin and a variety of other classmates who now felt like a lifetime ago. Perhaps your intentions for today were not the most pure hearted, but it was only because you were a headstrong woman taking control of your own life in the few ways you could.

He was also just a very, very good kisser.

“It’s nice to see that you have matured while I was away at school.” You retorted with a huff. You knew the man was only teasing, but that did nothing to stop the blush spreading across your cheeks. “You are quite presumptuous, my lord. Is it that unfathomable that two friends should meet for an afternoon lunch, nothing more?”

You didn’t notice the small smile he bit back. “If it is simply a friendly picnic, may I ask where it is taking place?” His brows raised a bit.

You fumbled for a moment, eyes darting away. “Um… the- the stables?” You knew you were going to be the loser of this conversation, despite it being a competition you started.

“Right, the stables, which sit conveniently far away from the main palace, and offer ample opportunity to be out of sight?” He laughed, clearly enjoying watching you get flustered.

“Respectfully, it is none of your business what I do with my time.” You told him, refusing to acknowledge to yourself that you asked him to ask about your plans.

Din rolled his eyes, but you could recognize the playful nature of the act. “Just don’t get caught, my lady,” he replied, watching you begin to walk away. “It would be quite the scandal for the future queen of Mandalore to be seen… canoodling, so to speak.”

“Canoodling? Is that even a word?”

This time he smiled at you. “I overheard some ladies-in-waiting say it the other day, I thought I would try it out on you. Feels incorrect now that I’ve said it aloud,”

A full laugh left your mouth, the previous redness finally leaving your cheeks. “I’m not so sure about it. Perhaps leave it to the ladies.”

“I mean it, though. Do be careful.”

His tone turned to a serious one. You knew how much trouble you would cause were you to be caught messing around with a man you were not betrothed to. Not just for you, but for Din as well; the arrangement of your marriage was for the benefit of both of your families. Your families offered each other wealth, station, and alliance, were something to ever go awry in the system. You were well on your way to coronation- two weeks after the wedding, to be exact- within your own family rank, and Din was technically already past the age in which he was supposed to take over the duties of his father, only delayed by his choice to attend the militia academy, so the set up simply made sense for all parties involved.

It wasn’t the worst arrangement you’d ever seen; you and Din had grown up together, only truly drifting apart when you left for school at thirteen. At the time you were harboring a burning, schoolgirl crush on the boy- the kind where you would peek at him over the edge of your book as he messed around with some of the palace children by the courtyard fountains, and steal glances at him from across rooms during meetings the two of you had been forced to attend. The feelings died out when you left, but you still held a great fondness for him, so you supposed being married to him wouldn’t be all that bad. You both had your own goings on, yours being Kelsin and his being… well, several girls from town that you had seen leaving his bedchamber in the early hours of many mornings. It all worked out.

Still facing him as you backed away, you smiled. “I am a betrothed, well-behaved lady. I would never act so unbecoming and foolishly.”

He smiled back at you and rolled his eyes once more (it seemed to be a habit of his, one you were sure he picked up during his training under the large helmet placed currently by his side). “Whatever helps you to sleep at night.”

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[theaverewrites]

Yokai and Yaksha - Playlist & Note

𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

i'll die anyway. - girl in red

✧.* I reach for me, but I'm not there

It's so lonely, but who cares

It's fine, it's okay

I'll die anyway

Juliet - Cavetown

✧.* Sometimes I act like I know

But I'm really just a kid

With two corks in his eyes

And a bully in his head

Exhale - Laureli Amadeus

✧.* Show yourself to me someday

I will be speechless

But for now let me

Lay it all down

As It Was - Harry Styles

✧.* In this world, it's just us

You know it's not the same as it was

In this world, it's just us

You know it's not the same as it was

Million Years Ago - Adele

✧.* I know I'm not the only one

Who regrets the things they've done

Sometimes I just feel it's only me

Who can't stand the reflection that they see

Cat And Mouse - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

✧.* Am I supposed to be happy?

With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.

Am I supposed to be happy?

With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.

Hole In The Heart - Rachie

✧.* That’s why a hole had opened up where my heart is

Pounding, my heartbeat tried to fill up the nothing

But when i tried to say it loud, the words that left my mouth

Were nothing more than excuses

Hawk In The Night - Madds Buckley

✧.* Sharpen your talons and fight

Claw at the world as it claws out your eyes

We raised you right

Hawk in the night

Overfly - Amalee

✧.* Hands up high

Raise them high

And cast your worries to the sky

If you can't stand, then take my hand

Recently, - Liana Flores

✧.* But recently

Everyone says they are seeing less of me

I could do better if I had energy

Be like I used to be

Old Friend - Mitski

✧.* You'll meet me at Blue Diner

I'll take coffee and talk about nothing, baby

At Blue Diner,

I'll take anything you want to give me, baby

Should've Been Me - Mitski

✧.* Cause, I haven't given you what you need

You wanted me but couldn't reach me

So you went into your memory

Relive all the ways you still want me

listen before i go - Billie Eilish

✧.* If you need me

Wanna see me

Better hurry

'Cause I'm leaving soon

brutal - Olivia Rodrigo

✧.* All I did was try my best,

this the kind of thanks I get?

Unrelentless upset

They say these are the golden years

Crossing Fields - Amalee

✧.* I know your strength is what I lack

You've got my back and now that I've got yours

I have you to thank for lighting up the dark

Because you're here with me, our dreams will soar free forever

Meteor Shower - Cavetown

✧.* Missing pieces of my skull

I'll sew on patches of my own soul

There's nothing you or I can do so let the stars fall

'Cause from up here the sky's my thoughts and we're all so small

A Burning Hill - Mitski

✧.* And I am the fire and I am the forest

And I am a witness watching it

I stand in a valley watching it

And you are not there at all

Fourth of July - Sufjan Stevens

✧.* Did you get enough love, my little dove

Why do you cry?

And I'm sorry I left, but it was for the best

Though it never felt right

Line Without a Hook - Ricky Montgomery

✧.* Baby, I am a wreck when I'm without you

I need you here to stay

I broke all my bones that day I found you

Crying at the lake

Cloud 9 - Beach Bunny

✧.* But when he loves me I feel like I'm floating

When he calls me pretty I feel like somebody

Even when we fade eventually to nothing

You will always be my favorite form of loving

rises the moon - Liana Flores

✧.* Oh-oh, close your weary eyes

I promise you that soon the autumn comes

To darken fading summer skies

Breathe, breathe, breathe

Thought Crime - Rachie

✧.* The birds cry out their song in the sunset!

The empty ache I feel starts to sing a swan song too

And yet you linger still in the shadows, standing on your toes, sky a flaming red hue

Slipping off my tongue was my goodbye to you

1. Constructive criticism is okay as long as it is legitimate feedback and not just hate.

2. There are a lot of musical references in this story, particularly in reference to the songs listed in the earlier chapter.

3. Please refrain from overly sexual comments.

4. The Xiao that I write is more akin to his Chinese portrayal than his English one. In other words, he's going to be more apathetic than angry.

5. The reader is based on a Japanese mythological creature. It's not a completely accurate representation, as they're only based on that creature, but quite a few of their characteristics have been adapted.

6. The reader is referred to using they/them pronouns, but may present as mostly feminine.

7. This takes place in the canon universe, and thus has canon level violence.

8. This story has topics that are not suitable for everyone, such as themes of grief and trauma, abandonment, and minor s/a. If any of these topics make you uncomfortable, I suggest you click away now.

9. This story will be posted on wattpad (@-AEONSTYX), Ao3 (@aeonstyx), and tumblr (@theaverewrites). Any and all updates about this story and others will be posted on wattpad, so I suggest you follow me there to keep up with changes.

10. Genshin Impact is owned by Hoyoverse. Please support the official release, and enjoy this fan-made story.

[accio-victuuri]

BoXiao : Endorsement CPNs

Just listing a few of my favorites, where we clowned so hard with what appears to be bxg biased signs from brands. Mostly 2020-2021. This was supposed to be a simple post but it got a little bit out of hand. So. Here you go. Enjoy!

Note: If you don’t like CPN posts, just scroll along. If you don’t like BJYX — this is not for you. don’t hurt yourself and skip this post.

1. RoseOnly - I will not add the RoseOnly x Peace Elite collaboration here anymore cause most of the people reading this should be familiar. A little bit of my thoughts on that are here.

Now let’s move on to other clownery, cause when I said we did see some 👀 before, I meant it.

• GG’s campaign with them where he showcased a bunny with rainbow colored flowers. They could be showcasing all the kind of flowers they have or LGBT friendly advertising. After all, All love is love. 🌈

• For Roseonly’s 8th anniversary, GG had a campaign and VCR w/ them and that big 8 flower. 8 means bo. It’s truly used for the anniversary but of course we CPN cause we are clowns.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwGnDR4zspI

• During Web’s promo for rules of my world and when his teaser photos came out— RoseOnly released a photo of a black rose ( same color as Web’s clothes in the teaser ) with the caption:

You’re the coolest guy in my heart.

• When they were doing a teaser for their new endorser, some people were pointing out that the silhouette looks like Bobo. lol. Twins!

• All the references to the Lonely Planet and Little Prince for this promotion. We all know that they both love LP and whether this is CPN or a personal preference— we’re claiming it!

• The green rose they once advertised with the caption I ONLY LOVE YOU. and with the green rose symbolizing innocence, simplicity and forever young. Green and those keywords, who do you remember?

• In 2019, they did a selling bundle with Shu Uemura which was a brand Web was endorsing at that time.

• In a live, the color green and red rose were together — GG and Web colors.

• An Ad in their online store where the display is the Leo rose which is Bobo’s zodiac sign. and GG is holding Libra. Leo x Libra. And with the caption below for their advertisement. We know Web is the Leo of all Leos but it’s still 👀

The proud Leo has a child-like arrogant temper. Some people think they are not easy to get along with, but they don’t know that they just have not entered their hearts. Actually, Leo’s tenderness is only for the right person.

Some other thing that I will add here for reference but I don’t necessarily believe. Link from weibo.

• When GG was announced as their brand spokesperson and Web gave a clue in his post. Also GG making 3 different posts and kadian combinations.

I’m adding in this collab they had with Eleme, the same time Web was endorsing the brand.

I’m sure I missed a couple more from RoseOnly but that just depends on how clear your BXG glasses are. To me the most important is their Lonely Planet / Star campaign with GG last year.

2. Shu Uemura - This is one of the OG brands that Web endorses and who loves him very much. They signed him when he was not yet a big star and flew him to different countries. They treat him very well. 🤍

• The most recent one is from their Ad with Bobo and a red ribbon which made us all think of WWX. I can understand from an Ad perspective that it’s perfect to pair up with a red lipstick — but our brains are wired to CPN. Soooo. And this is not their first offense with stuff like this.

• This Ad featuring Bobo : - "博"君一笑 BJYX.

• For the promotion photos of this eyeshadow palette, the colors and look is similar to GG’s painting for the Guangdian album cover. Yes. This was done some time after the song was released.

• This one is more of a coincidence. Years apart, both on the same day, they posted about a collaboration with One piece. It’s their favorite Anime. GG as Luffy & Web as Roronoa Zoro.

3. Qeelin -  will be very lazy with this one and copy/paste from my jewelry post. Take note that this Bobo design is not new and had always been a classic from Qeelin.

4. Kai Xiao Zao - Ah! KXZ! The brand that loves GG the most. So what signs did they give?

• Their recent new product is wontons. Who do we know that likes wontons? It reminded BXGs of the unofficial BTS when Web was nagging GG to eat Wontons.

• They used a well known BXG idiom:

"你是夏日限定, 也是来日方长"

5. Chunzhen - Endorsed by Bobo, and this is under Mengniu. It caused some drama— cause GG & Web are technically promoting the same company. but like, there are so many other c-ent artists endorsing this brand.

• They posted for this year’s Qixi, stating in the Caption that Bobo is able to balance love and work. Really? How did they know? And they had made a character called XIAO ZHEN for qixi ( a cartoon girl with blue hair ).

• Zhenguoli ( endorsed by GG ) and Chunzhen drinks which are under the same company posted graphics of the two drinks together. 👀

• Also since it’s both under the same umbrella company, and both yogurt drinks— you can see their boxes together in shops.

6. Stride - In Bobo’s box set initial release, 3 flavors were included and one of them is passionfruit or bai xiang guo ( bxg ). Of course, bxgs bought it because we were represented. ✌🏼

Also in a message, the brand acknowledged BXGs but later had to delete it because of well— you know who.

Dear Moto/Passion Fruit fans,

Thank you for your support to Hyunmai's spokesperson~. The gift box endorsed by Yibo is temporarily sold out, it is recommended You first collect and purchase, if it is sold later.

Please buy it as soon as possible~

7. Swarovski -  endorsed by Web 🤍

• They had turtle charms and bracelets, which endeared them to BXGs.

• They had a bracelet where you can put charms and in their Ad, it spells YIBO. of course. However a BXG noticed that on their recommended letters to add next, the letters are XZ + heart with a dot.

• Last year’s promotion of a lock necklace— Web changed his Weibo header. ‘Lock love, lock you.’

• His May 2020 Mother’s day promotion video that includes a confession (?). I know this is far off but the line used:

“ I love you, want you to see. I am Wang Yibo, this is my unique confession" is so similar to GG’s Bazaar confession.

8. Budweiser -- What we basically CPN about them is that they are an LGBT friendly brand and it’s always a plus when our boys endorse those kind of companies.

• Here you can find the CPN on the can that GG supposedly created with them.

• Their ad about ALL LOVE IS LOVE.•

 An earlier Ad that had two male leads. and another one recently released with same sex couple. 🌈

Also they did a collab with G-shock which is a brand that Web endorses.

9. Man Han Feast Noodles

• The most recent one is GG playing the Guqin ala LWJ and looking out the window to see the moon ( again ala LWJ ). Best part is GG looking like he would burst out laughing and they kept in the Ad.

• In their Mother’s Day post one line says “if you love someone you’ll always encourage them to eat more”. Sounds like a familiar gesture right? Who do we know nags each other to eat?

10. Zenith Do I even have to explain this? 

• GG chose a rainbow watch from Zenith collection for Qixi Festival. 🌈

11. Mengniu - Oh well, just last week they had to clarify as an Ad from them was seen with the words: "并肩于雪山之巅" = BJYXSZD. (Side by Side at the snowy mountain top)

12. Anta/ Li-ning - I’m adding it here cause the store owners in this video brought out GG/Web standees together 😂 Context is, there was a BJYX gathering going on so they took that out cause they knew the attendees loved them.

Plus this shopping app that put them together.

I’m capping this post here and will update this sometime in the future. However the ones I added here stood out to me or I experienced when it came out. I wanted to add Luckin Tea / Lays / Olay but that will be for another time.

As with all the CPN, feel free to not believe any of these and just take it as a coincidence. Or people clowning and reading into things more than they should. lol. Whether these are intentional or not, BXGs are always there to support the boys whenever they can. 🙏🏼

[911lonestarscreentime]

How balanced are the episodes of 911 Lone Star?

Lately I’ve been rewatching season 1 with my mom (she only started watching season 2 with me as it aired) and last night after we watched 1x05, she commented that she thought that the distribution of screen time was better in season 1 compared to season 2 (she does know I do screen time calculations... I don’t know if she fully understands how much of my free time is dedicated to the project but I digress). Anyway, I was caught off guard and wasn’t sure how to answer. I would like to think season 2 is better, but is it?

Obviously, it’s unrealistic to expect that every episode be equally balanced. There would be development of characters if that were the case. However, we all know at this point that when it is unbalanced, the higher times are usually skewed towards Owen. Which is an issue, and I do hope there is some change going forward. But looking at all of the screen times for each episode, it does raise the questions: Which episodes are the most balanced? And is there a difference in balance between seasons?

Answer: In season 1 it’s 1x03 and 1x09; In season 2 it’s 2x05 and 2x06. And there really is no difference in balance between seasons.

Want to know more? Check out my actual analysis below the cut.

Also just to be clear before I go into detail, only the screen times for main characters were taken into account (so not including Nancy, Gwyn, ect;) and credit-only episodes (episodes where the character received credit but did not appear on screen) were taken into account as “0.”

To answer the first question, I’ll break it down by season. The two most balanced episodes by my calculations are 1x03 “Texas Proud” and 1x09 “Awakening.” Some of the other more balanced episodes of the season include 1x04 “Act of God,” 1x05 “Studs,” and 1x10 “Austin, We Have Problem.” The most unbalanced episode (unsurprisingly) is 1x01 “Pilot.” (personal note: seeing it laid out like that makes sense that my mom would think the balance for season 1 is better, watching x03, x04, x05 back-to-back, and not watching x06, x07, x08 yet... all three of which fall in the bottom half).

In season 2, the most balanced episodes are 2x05 “Difficult Conversation” and 2x06 “Everyone and Their Brother.” Some of the other most balanced episodes include 2x02 “2100°,” 2x04 “Friends with Benefits,” 2x08 “Bad Call,” and 2x14 “Dust to Dust.” The most unbalanced episodes are (also, unsurprisingly) 2x09 “Saving Grace,” and 2x13 “One Day.” (again, my moms observations make sense since the most recent s2 episodes she has watched are the ones in the back half of season 2, all of which (with the exception of 2x14) fall in the bottom half of screen time balance).

So, is there a difference between seasons? The short answer is no. While there are more episodes that could be considered “more balanced” in season 2, there are also more episodes in season 2. And looking at my calculations (which I go into more detail about at the bottom of the post) if you remove the four episodes that fall on each quarter percentile, it lines up basically the same. 

The only real difference is who has the most screen time in the unbalanced episodes. In season 1, all episodes except for 1x08 saw Owen having the most screen time. However, in season 2 there were 7 episodes where Owen didn’t have the most. That’s half the episodes of the season. Granted, 5 of these episodes fall in the top half for most balanced; but the other 2 are the episodes that are most unbalanced, with Judd having the most in 2x09 and Tommy having the most in 2x13. So however you want to interpret that... yeah. In my opinion, it is getting better. But we’ll see how season 3 goes.

Okay so now that I actually told you the answers, you might be wondering how I came to those conclusions. If you’re not a math person than feel free to ignore this last part...

Of course one could easily just look at the infographics and see that 1x03 looks fairly balanced, but I wanted data to back it up... so I may have figured out my own formula. Idk if this is like mathematically correct but it did the trick.

So I started by calculating the average for each episode. Using 1x03 as the example, the average screen time for that episode is 3.94 (rounded). Then I took the highest screen time (7.5) and subtracted the average from that. Then I did the same thing with the lowest screen time (0.5) and subtracted that from the average. Those two numbers are 3.56 and 3.54, the distance between the highest and the average and the lowest and the average. Then calculating the distance between those two numbers, the total is 0.12 - a very low number, bringing me to the conclusion that the balance for 1x03 is fairly good.

However if you do the same for 1x06, highest (12) - average (4.08) = 7.92, average (4.08) - lowest (0.5) = 3.58, 7.92 - 3.58 = 4.34 - meaning that 1x06 is more unbalanced in screen time compared to 1x03.

here are the charts if you’re interested because why not:

[ginkgomoon]

Gavin’s Mini House In Detail 🏡

During the Mini House special events, I obtained all the furnishing items and had already unlocked all the furniture in the home so I thought for Gavin’s Birthday Week, I would share all of the little secrets it contains! 

Gavin has four sections of the house including-

Living Room

Loft 

Courtyard

Basement

This post also includes MC’s commentary and quotes from special happenings associated with Gavin. Special furnishes will have the coziness points indicated next to its name.

Please enjoy! 

Living Room

Soft Stool 

The white soft stool next to the tea table.

This stool is a must when Gavin watches soccer games.

The leather surface is very soft, and its height is just right for watching TV on.

Want to know the trend of the soccer lottery recently? How about asking about it? 

It seemed to have won all the recent games, and is both happy and lonely.

If his favourite team loses, Gavin will sit here alone. (#sad) 

White Sofa 

With so many pillows, you don’t have to worry about having no support behind you.

Is the white sofa difficult to clean? 

The bolsters are very comfortable.

Curled up on the sofa with soft ginkgo aroma.

“Gavin, do you remember what you told me?”

“I just want to be with you, just like this...”

“You still remembered!” 

“I won’t forget what I’ve told you.” 

“Then... Do you have anything you want to tell me this time?” 

Gavin kissed MC’s forehead gently.

- This special happening (Starry Sky) refers to the Furniture City Date!

White Table 

“Gavin’s Pad is placed here too.”

(It has a photo of MC and she says she will change it into the both of them next time.)

“I can add a snack box, but Gavin doesn’t really eat snacks.”

Hallway Cabinet

“Gavin waters the plants regularly.”

“These are often loose change on the cabinet which we can take before going out.”

“The silver ornament is a souvenir I bought when we went to Disneyland.”

The “Wavy Thing”

“I noticed a little “go for it” written on the most recently scrawled page of the notebook.” 

“I found a magazine that puts people to sleep in a second, which was necessary for insomniacs.”

Zoombot 

The black Zoombot.

Today I’m again busy all over the place saving Zoombot.

It’s a bit stupid and often gets stuck after hitting the furniture.

Makes a buzzing sound when working.

You threaten it: If you hang again, I’ll replace you!  

Music Stand

The music stand bought by Gavin.

On it are sheets of music scores printed by Gavin.

It will sometimes think that the small black table next to it is a bit short.

Sometimes Gavin uses in in the hanging chair to record melodies.

Gavin will print the music scores and put them on it to practice.

Flowers on the Wall 

Each flower is carefully selected by Gavin.

The front wall stores a variety of flowers.

The flowers on the entire flower wall are all preserved fresh flowers. 

Black Table and Seat 

Looking at it closely, it is the song that Gavin played last time. (Music score sheet on table.) 

It is also very comfortable with the little black seat cushion next to it.

The soft black cushion stuffed with cotton.

My exclusive seat for Gavin’s recital.

I bought it with Gavin when we were shopping at the furniture market.

Hanging Chair/Rose Hanging Chair (Coziness 88)

A great napping spot.

Here in the Leisure Time special happening, MC and Gavin talk about the swing they had in high school. MC is surprised that Gavin knew about the view of the sunset when being on it. He says he “passed by” sometimes. MC notes how the ginkgo leaves danced in the wind. He says, “they were gifts from another person”.

Heart-Shaped Chair (Coziness 28)

A cute small stool and a convenient storage box.

Gavin’s expression was a bit subtle while he sat on it first.

Alternating blue and pink hearts, as it’s a Valentine’s Day limited edition.

Surfboard Cabinet (Coziness 42)

It’s a new surfboard. Bring it next time we travel.

There are also other surfboards. Guess where they are? 

It says fly on the surfboard, like I can leap through waves with it.

(THEIR CUTE SHOES ARE NEXT TO IT AHHH)

Blue Lamp

A lamp that always blows bubbles from the bottom to top.

It’s beautiful and dreamlike when switched on at night.

Black Table on the Left 

“This looks like the score that Gavin played on the beach last time. I suddenly feel a bit nostalgic.”  - This refers to the Slightly Drunken Date!

“I found a picture of an asleep Gavin. He was sleeping soundly.”

Claw Machine and Carpet 

A dream-like claw machine. Gavin will add new dolls in it.

The inserted game coins can be taken out from the back of the machine and then reused.

A small black carpet in front of the claw machine.

I bought it together with the large carpet.

Red Bunny, White Bunny, Pink Bunny, Red Bunny, Grey Bunny.

Motorcycles 

The blue motorcycle sometimes want to compete with the opposite motorcycle.

The colour of the motorcycle displayed is sky blue. 

Maybe its name will be “Azure”? (because Gavin uses colours to individually name items.) 

Spring Landscape Display 

The landscape has been embedded into the window, like beautiful paintings.

Maybe there is a new world inside.

I can't help stopping to enjoy the view each time I pass.

Is designed for a wider view, improving your mood even when you're tired.

Winter Landscape Display (Coziness 61)

A corresponding landscape should be changed into winter.

Such heavy snow! Frozen river! Unfortunately, they are all fake. 

You can enjoy the red maple leaves and snow even at home, isn’t it wonderful?

Loft 

Painting

This is a word map that covers the entire wall.

Looking at it, Gavin and I have already been to so many places.

If you want to travel, you can find the destination on it in advance.

I'm willing to create memories with him in many more places.

Chandelier

The current iron style design is really cool.

Shines warm yellow when turned on, warming our hearts.

Display Cabinet  

It should have been a wine cabinet, but Gavin doesn’t drink, so it became a display cabinet.

The ‘little things’ between me and Gavin are displayed inside.

It looks empty now, but it will slowly be filled up in the future.

Black Tea Table

A black low table in front of the sofa.

I occasionally work here.

The star and moon deco piece is very beautiful, I picked it with Gavin.

You can put fruits and snacks on it while reading.

The wood texture had a matted quality with the black coat of paint.

Art 

Looks cold but is artistic.

Seems useless, but also seems cool.

Greenery

A corner with blooming flowers all seasons, is warm and restful to the eye.

Outside the window is a huge ginkgo tree, and the fallen leaves are like brocade.

I feel like it’s always spring with all these flowers around.

It compliments the scenery outside the window. (They have a ginkgo tree right outside their home!) 

Cabinet 

Photo framed have karmas from the Starry Date and the Romantic Date!

Decorative Cabinet/Snowman Closet (Coziness 49)

The two little snowmen stared at each other throughout the winter. (Cute little reference to the CN Recovery ASMR.)

It looks like a window at first glance, but it’s actually a cabinet if you look carefully.

And you could open it. Didn’t see that coming right? 

Starry Sky Wall (Coziness 52)

Today’s wish… I hope that Gavin…

I will accompany you to see the meteor rain which falls on this Earth.

Every moment a wish is realised, there will be a meteor streaking across the sky.

Dandelion Lamp (Coziness 43)

The lamp looks exactly like the grapefruit during Mid-Autumn Festival.

Like a burning sparkler, shining brightly.

Six light sources, not too dazzling nor too dark.

Festive Decoration Table (Coziness 57)

Although there are two cups of drinks, we can still drink from the same cup.

The sofa in the corner always makes people feel safe. 

Although we are only two people, I still chose two long couches.

The letter under the ginkgo biloba leaf, writes a love poem.

All the shopping bags represent his most flawless love.

The wide view allows you to see the scenery in the yard.

The soft white mat was added afterwards.

But it’s always hot under the sunlight, so the curtain is often pulled down.

Basement

Security Camera 

You are in a monitored area, please mind your actions.

Bulletproof Glass 

It’s not a normal screen, it’s bulletproof.

It's not often that one gets to see such a cool and HARD-CORE transparent screen.

Anyways, curious what’s in this wall.

Sci-fi glass wall in the movies.

The engraved badge is Gavin’s silent pride.

1-2-3... still shorter than it!

Gingko Tree

Seasons slip by soundlessly.

No matter how small their wishes are, they will become seeds and eventually bloom in gold.

All life’s little joys turned into gold.

It guards the serene life here quietly over in the corner.

(Gavin makes ginkgo bookmarks with them for MC. CRIES.)

Corner Resting Area 

These action figures are actually pretty fun!

The puzzle is all grown up. It should be able to piece itself back together. (LOL)

(Puzzle) Maybe finish it while Gavin’s gone? 

(Table) It sometimes thinks the table is a bit short.

(Chair) It looks hard but it’s actually comfortable to sit on.

Very spacious, but looks a bit empty.

Some decorations should be displayed here.

Sitting on a blanket is also very comfortable. You can also lean on the small pillow. 

(Carpet) This is a carpet. You can’t tell, right? 

The advanced smart carpet that is warm in winter and cool in summer is awesome.

(The book on the table is called ‘Kritik Der Urteilskraft’- The Critique of Judgement by famous German philosopher Immanuel Kant. It follows after the Critique of Pure Reason and the Critique of Practical Reason- the First and Second Critiques, respectively. The Critique of Judgment constitutes a discussion of the place of Judgment itself, which must overlap both the “understanding” and “reason”.)

“You need to take better care of your health.”

“Who was the one working overnight over the proposal the other day?”

“Alright, we’re birds of a feather, so... so both of us should look after ourselves for each other!” 

“Rest assured, I will. After all, it’s different now. I have you by my side.”  -Harmonous Compa Special Happening

Gavin’s Workspace

Accompany Gavin though every sleepless night.

This seems… No, I’m seeing things.

All folders are neatly organised and arranged.

A spacious table, with files and reports spread all over when busy.

I no need to worry about waking up from naps due to cold late at night.

I was reminded of some criminal investigation shows I have watched. Come on, Officer Gavin!

If this complicated case is made into a movie, it will be an exhilarating one. 

(Computer) A customised large-screen UHD model customised for work purpose.

(Computer) Work exclusive computer, only connected to intranet.

(Computer) The three auxiliary monitors can help keep the data safe.

(Chair) If you want to protect your waist, you should first have a comfortable cushion.

(Chair) if you work long hours, be sure to work in a comfortable chair.

(Board Area) What does it say? Ermm… Cats have nine lives? 

“Found a girl crookedly drawn next to a work record when he reached a bottleneck.” 

Airplane

This airplane model was assembled by Gavin himself.

The computer says-  Agent B-7

Team Operator S.T.R.I.K.E

Location Tracker 

S.P.Y Camera 

U4V Commando

Gunship Operation 

Motorcycle Repair Area 

Every vehicle is so cool in its own way! 

Hello, you are... Little… Erm… Let me think… 

With the strength to lift mountains and the spirit to take on the world! Ha! 

The robot arm is actually a simple robot.

For your safety, please don’t linger below it

(Motorcycle) I would like to greet my seniors.

Electronic Control Pad

Responsible for controlling the rising, descending and switches of the entire area.

On Spring Festival, it will say: Happy New Year, Sir!”

Sooner or later, fully automated smart management will be achieved.

Radio Office 

It’s an important communication device, and the only disadvantage is that it’s a bit heavy.

It’s actually a satellite phone, and it can receive signals everywhere.

Looks like the palm phone in the 90s. Oh no, I’ve exposed myself.

It looks like an electrocardiogram.

Don’t know how to use this weird device.

A thick laptop that it’s properly shut when not in use.

A cool eagle logo is printed on it.

Gavin used it only for special tasks and it will not be brought out.

LMAO MC DOESN’T HAVE ACCESS-

Courtyard 

Corner Seating Area 

A courtyard in sunny or snowy days are interested in their own ways.

Sometimes the unfrequented bolsters will envy the knee pillow.

It's’ wonderful when two people are sitting here reading, even if they don’t talk.

Standing barefoot on the soft lawn is very comfortable.

There's nothing nicer than basking ourselves when its sunny.

Binoculars

The white binoculars which you can see things several miles away.

You can use it to watch the stars when it’s not too cloudy.

But star-watching is clearer mid-air.

Seems to be the same binoculars as those in the scenic area.

The binoculars in the scenic area require coins, but this one doesn't.

Outdoor Lounge Chairs 

The new furniture I asked Gavin to buy.

Can enjoy the sunlight spa comfortably when relaxing. 

Closing my eyes, I feel like I’m lying on a beach.

The soft breeze and warm sunshine. This is life. 

Lying on it and looking at the blue sky and white clouds, your mind goes blank easily.

The blue and white clouds-

Leisure Table/Romantic Table (Coziness 52)

Lace tablecloth… I can’t imagine that it was chosen by Gavin.

The elaborately prepared dinner and roses, just for today.

A large sunshade on the balcony. (Black large umbrella.)

Bird Nest (Coziness 37) 

Once it was a pair of binoculars, now it’s a bird’s nest.

I bought it just because it was cute, but I’ll consider having pets in the future.

Birds flying by can also have a free meal here.

[hellolimitless]

Your HS vs FK analysis makes sense. I think people compared the two purely because the watch hours for both are readily available, and HS is also a recent queer teen show. While completion times aren't as readily accessible (and not from Netflix) for both shows. I also suspect that Netflix tracks unique user views which means same account watching a show a million times = watching 1 time to Netflix. So fans binging it repeatedly won't help. Nonetheless, if FK had bigger views and lower completion rate, then most of those views happened in first half of the season, meaning that's a problem with the show clicking with a wider audience (either due to story problems or marketing attracting wrong audience problems), and not marketing reach itself. But if the views were overall lower and completion rates higher, then the problem would be marketing not reaching enough people. I am curious what were HS' completion rate. As well as knowing if Netflix uses unique viewer numbers or just views total would help. Regardless, I am bummed that unambiguously from start wlw in lead role with the character not primarily written for straight audiences don't have staying power. I am also sad every time I see social media filled with accounts who hate these shows - often even before release - and seem unable to believe that others could love the show, and make it their business to produce post after post bashing it. I may be in a bubble but I feel wlw lead shows are overly targeted. Curious about your thoughts on the qualitative experience ?

@icantthinkofaname133 i tried to search the completion for Heartstopper, I couldn’t find anything but I am sure it’s high, not only because it got renewed but because the show was easy to watch and not long. Netflix are very secretive about their numbers and it’s true that the hours watched data kind of don’t mean anything. For First kill, it’s coming from people who basically only watched the first couple episodes as it was tracking up until the 12th of June and Fk was released on the 10th. I wrote the post of the fk and hs analysis with obviously knowing what is the problem and where it’s coming from, it’s stemming over the fact that wlw rarely get any rep, even on shows that have queer couple as secondary couple, it’s almost always a male couple but like I said this issue that is important to be brought up can be without saying gay are too privileged in the media. Actually I have the contrary impression of you, I feel mlm shows/movies are more targeted as people believe gay has too much representation and are always centered in media : all the biggest queer movies in the media are starring gay men (Brokeback, CMBYN, Moonlight), all the biggest queer shows are about gay men (Love Victor, Heartstopper), gay couple are the majority in term of secondary couple in straight media (Lone star, Sex Education) and of course almost all the upcoming queer projects are about gay representation ( RWRB, My policeman, Aristotle and Dante) like I said gay men and gay representation suffered for years and years, it’s still up to very recently that real change were seen even if we are still far behind. Love Victor came out not even 3 years ago and they got moved from Disney+ to Hulu because the gay rep was deemed not family friendly, it’s only for the 3rd and last season that the full show was aired on Disney+. Lesbians rep is a little behind but it will get there and it’s important to call out the over-cancellation of wlw centric shows, but I am going to be honest I hate that it’s with First Kill that the argument is being pushed, yes First Kill is the last prominent cancellation of a sapphic show and 2022 had been the record for sapphic show to end (The Wilds, Killing Eve, Gentleman Jack) but i believe it’s not First kill they particularly want as honestly the show was not good and yes I know it didn’t stand any chance as Netflix did not care for it a bit, but I believe First Kill being cancelled as a show is the best thing to do if they are not going to make any effort and the product was already not good in season 1. Now there need to be more wlw produced shows or movies, Casey mcquiston wrote two sapphics book they should get their own adaptations, they are going to have the seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Releasing high quality wlw centric shows with multiple seasons, and also start to give trans masc some rep as really their representation is abysmal.

[footballfanfictions]

The thrill of the chase - Chapter One

Pairings: Mason Mount/OC, Ben Chilwell/OC

Warnings: None for now but you know me, I like a little smut here and there...

-------------------------------------------------

"If I have to edit and upload one more post about golden boy, I'm going to scream" I groaned, rubbing my temples. It's not even 10am on Monday morning and I already want to quit my job.

Brianna is sat on a chair, flipping through a magazine opposite my desk, and although her job doesn't require her to be in an office, she spends most of her time here.

"At least your job involves more than just washing and folding sweaty socks with your dad." She mused.

I rolled my eyes at her. She didn't quite get how annoying it is to be a graphic designer and social media manager that is only given the same images to work with over and over. My eyes flick back to my computer screen and the grinning Male on it. He isn't completely unattractive but him being a footballer and what all the praise he has been getting lately must be doing to his ego was enough to put me off. I would go as far as to say I disliked the guy.

"So if you don't like Mason, who do you watch from this window?" Bri was suddenly up on her feet and standing at my office window. It was floor to ceiling and had a good view of the training complex and sliding door access. The office had used to belong to Jose Mourinho both times he had been the manager here, shunning the actual managers office for one where he could see the pitches clearer. The first team trained about 5ft from where she was standing and if one of them were to look up from their drills they would see her staring out at them.

I pulled her away from the window by her arm.

"I don't sit here looking out of the window all the time, I have a job to do"

Occasionally, if I was on a particularly boring phone call I would let my eyes wander over to the window just to see what they were up to, but never watched any one player in particular. I didn't even know who some of the new faces were.

"Personally I think all the ones around our age are really hot -" Bri then started listing the names off and it sounded like she named the entire 23 man squad by the time she was finished.

We were then interrupted by a knock on my office door and Bri's father Dave stuck his head round it and said "sorry to interrupt girls but Bri and I have some kits to organise." He looked more amused than angry, being pretty used to his daughter avoiding her duties by now. "You wouldn't mind bringing us two of those fancy coffees of yours would you Katie?" He asked.

One of the other perks of having Jose's old office was the coffee machine. He had it installed and compared to the muck that came out of the cafeteria's coffee machines, it produced gold.

"Will do." I replied as Bri scurried over to her father and out of the door.

I decided coffee delivery was a good way to get out of having to stare at all the social media channels for a few minutes.

Once the coffees were made I tipped them from the plastic cups into two mugs from the cupboard beneath the machine, it felt nicer to take them to my friend and her dad that way.

It was tricky negotiating opening my office door with each hand occupied by a steaming hot mug, but I managed to nudge it open with a combination of my elbow and the heel of my shoe. I was just praising myself internally for getting the door open when something knocked into the side of me, tipping the contents of the mug into my right hand over whatever it had been.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry."

I looked up from the hallway carpet which I was worried was stained with coffee, into the smiling face of someone wearing a training kit.

"No that was me, shit sorry. Have I just poured boiling hot coffee all over the star striker or something? Marina will kill me." I put both of the mugs down on the floor and ran back into my office, coming back out a few seconds later with a wad of tissues. I tried to dab the stain on his top with the tissues but they were pretty useless and he knew it too because he put his hand over mine to stop me.

"Don't worry about it love, I'm not star striker, I'm just the left back."

He didn’t seem mad about having coffee thrown all over him. Being a footballer I was half expecting him to throw a fit and go all ‘do you know who I am?’. But he didn’t. Instead, he gave me the nicest smile.

“Please let me get you another training shirt at least? I was just heading to the kit room with the coffees.” I balled up the wad of tissues and put them in the bin in the hallway just to the side of us and picked the mug that I hadn’t dropped back up. Brianna would have to go without and it served her right really for avoiding her job for most of the morning.

“Alright then.” He agreed. “Lead the way, I haven’t been here long, so not sure where to go if I’m honest.”

“Oh right yeah, of course.” I pretended like I knew who he was and that he had only just signed, unsure of whether he could actually tell that I had no idea. He probably did know that as I asked if he was the star striker, when in fact he’s a left back.

He followed me silently down the corridor to the kit room. I knocked once before entering.

“Is that you Katie?” Dave called from inside.

“No, it’s Starbucks” I laughed.

He opened the door, a pair of socks slung over his shoulder.

“Cheers love, come in.” He said.

I looked back at the footballer behind me and gestured for him to follow.

“I had a bit of an accident on the way here Dave and ended up pouring Brianna’s all over…” I was about to ask his name when Dave cut me off.

“Ben Chilwell! I was so chuffed that you’d signed. It’s about time we got an English core to this team back. God Katie did do a number on your shirt didn’t she?” he laughed, clapping Ben on the back, before he went over to a stack of the blue and white training tops.

Ben. Yeah he looked like a Ben. Undeniably he was quite handsome. I saw Brianna out of the corner of my eye, she was sat gawping at him with her mouth half open.

I tried to gesture to Brianna that she needed to put her tongue back in her mouth. She seemed to get the hit and straightened the way she was sat, playing it cool. I tried not to laugh.

Dave passed Ben a fresh shirt, and I got a whiff of the freshly laundered scent as it passed in front of me.

“Thank you so much.” Ben said, accepting the new shirt gratefully. “I’ll try my best to watch where I’m going in the future.”

He gave us all a smile and apologetically said that he needed to get back to training before he left the kit room.

“Blimey!” Brianna sighed once he was gone.

“What?” I asked.

“Sorry that you have to hear this dad, but bloody hell he was fit. I’m disappointed that he didn’t want to change here.” we both started laughing and Dave shook his head, muttering a ‘you two’ under his breath before going back to matching the socks up.

“I’m going to go too, do you want to get lunch later Bri?” I asked, hoping that she would want to walk to the shops with me. I needed a few things and I wouldn’t have much time after work to go.

“Only if we’re getting it here because I want to be in the canteen when they all come in from training.” she was gazing toward the tiny window in the kit room dreamily as she spoke.

I rolled my eyes but agreed.

I spent the walk back to my office wondering if Ben Chilwell actually was as fit as Brianna was making him out to be.

Sitting back down at my desk, I logged back into my computer. I had new emails sat in the inbox. One of them happened to be pictures of the new players for me to edit. I had an edit of every player in the team that I had ready for match days. On a match day I would be in charge of adding time stamps for any goals and then uploading the goal scorer’s picture. Recently, more often than not I had been having to upload the same few pictures of Mason Mount and it was getting a bit boring. The fans loved it though, he was our most retweeted player and often I would read the social media comments, all singing his praises. Especially the young women.

———————————————————————————————————

By the time it got to lunchtime I was sick of photoshop. My program wasn’t running very smoothly, probably in need of an update and I had grown more and more frustrated as the morning went on, having to restart it twice.

Brianna came to my office just before 1 and waited for me to finish off my last edit and lock my computer.

“Good morning?” she asked. “Because no offence you look mega stressed and we don’t need that kind of vibe if we are going to be around fit footballers for the next hour.”

I wanted to eye roll for the millionth time but I cut her some slack. She had recently had a really bad break up and her ex had been a proper bellend. Unfortunately for Bri, she didn’t have the greatest amount of luck when it came to guys. Her ex had broken up with her for another girl and had then continued to hook up with Bri, who had stupidly let him until I had convinced her what a bad idea that was. She was clearly feeling really lonely.

“Someone will come along you know, it doesn’t have to be a footballer.” I said, putting my hand on her arm and squeezing reassuringly.

“But Liam supports Chelsea, so how mad would he be if I got off with one of his favourite players? He’d be begging me to take him back then.” she smirked.

“That’s not what you want though right? To get back with him I mean.” I opened the door and we started to walk down the hallway towards the canteen while we chatted.

“No, I just want him to feel the sting of rejection and know how it feels for once.” she shrugged.

When we reached the door to the canteen there was a young lad with mousey brown hair kind of hanging around. His face lit up at the sight of us and I was slightly taken aback by it.

“After you.” He said, opening the door for us. He had a really strong Scottish accent that I hadn’t heard before. I guessed he must be part of the youth team. He’d probably end up out on loan after loan and we’d never see him again.

“That was strange.” I mumbled to Bri.

She shrugged, walking over to the back of the queue to get food. I followed her and grabbed a tray for myself.

I reached into the chilled drinks cabinet and picked out an iced coffee placing it on my tray.

“Glad to see that isn’t a hot coffee!”

Turning my head to the side, I saw that it was Ben again, standing behind me in the queue and then just behind him, my favourite person of all, Mason Mount.

“Yeah I’m on a final warning about spilling hot drinks over footballers so I’m only allowed cold coffees from now on”. I joked.

“I’m sure Benj will keep you warm in the winter.” Mason piped up.

I tried not to curse under my breath that he was butting into our conversation.

“Mate.” Ben said to Mason, shaking his head.

“What? she is fitter than you said.” Mason bantered back, looking at me rather than Ben.

“Thanks but I don’t need validation from you.” I bantered back, before moving along to the next chiller and picking out a caesar salad and an apple.

I heard the word “feisty” from behind me, but couldn’t tell which one of them had said it as I caught Brianna up in the queue.

She gave me a puzzled look and I shrugged, simply mouthing the word ‘boys’.

As employees we didn’t have to pay for any of our food which was a nice perk of the job and saved me a lot of money in eating out and packed lunches.

We took our food over to one of the tables that we usually sat at whenever we used the canteen and we were joined as usual by some of the other members of support staff.

Brianna was filling them in on my mishap with the coffee that morning while I scrolled through twitter on my phone. I liked to check how our social media platforms looked from the perspective fo the intended audience.

“You’re such a workaholic” Bri scolded me.

I looked up and apologised, tucking my phone away into my pocket.

“You two are polar opposites” Jane, one of the physios said. “I do agree with Brianna to an extent about some of the new faces. If I were a few years younger…”

Jane was a bit like our work mother. She was in her mid 50s and happily married with two teenage boys of her own to contend with. Because she had never had any daughters, she took particular care of me and Bri and loved to join in with our girl talk.

“I don’t think it would be worth the hassle personally” I shrugged.

Jane grinned. “You’re so sensible Katie, and probably right. Young men with too much fame and money probably don’t make the best partners. I tried to say that about my Martin too, back in the day. He was in the army and you know what they say about them!”

We both looked at her waiting for her to give us the answer.

“You know, a girl in every base town.” she laughed. “I tamed him though. Maybe don’t write them off completely.”

I wasn’t sure that I wanted to attempt to find a partner at all. I had been single since things that fallen apart with my ex when we both left uni. At uni we had a lot more time for each other, despite the different schedules and studying. When I had started working for Chelsea I put everything that I had into my job, desperately wanting to make a good impression. Hundreds of people had applied for the position and I wanted to make them feel like they had made the right choice in hiring me. So long days in the office turned into long days and evenings in the office, especially when Chelsea had late kick offs. I just found it easier to be in my office with the radio commentary on, sending out the tweets as the goals went in.

“Katie, are you listening? You zoned out a bit again.” Jane said, waving her hand in front of my face.

“Sorry just thinking about my to do list” I mumbled, trying not to admit to them that I had been thinking about Rory again. Sometimes it isn’t the person that you miss, just the feeling of having someone.

“I was just making you aware that are three young men constantly looking over here.” she said, trying to keep her voice low.

I was curious so I looked, there were a few of them sat at the furthest table, but none of them were looking in our direction.

“Who?” I asked.

“Oh I don’t know the names, I just deal with the injuries.” she shrugged.

“Well that’s helpful then” Bri said, pouting. “I wanted to know which ones fancied me so that I could target my flirting.”

———————————————————————————————————

Ben

“Go and talk to her.” Mason encouraged me.

I shook my head, trying to focus on eating my food, although I hadn’t really been able to. I had just been using my fork to move it around my plate aimlessly.

“No.” I mumbled. “I barely even know the girl. She spilt her coffee on me then got me another training shirt.”

“Oh yeah.” Mason smirked. “Did she help you put it on too?”

“She got you a new training shirt?” It was Billy that spoke now. He looked really nervous and was pretty much doing the same as me, forking his food around rather than actually eating it.

“Yeah from that room with all the kits in” I responded.

“Oh.” he said quietly, looking down.

I caught on then. Billy had been ahead of us coming off the training pitch and I had seen him wait and then open the door for the girls with a big grin on his face. I had thought he was just being polite, but I now realised it was more than that. He had waited on purpose and obviously liked one of them.

“It was the brunette one. The little blonde was in the room too but it wasn’t here that me and Mase were talking about” as I explained I watched Billy brighten back up again. It was the other one that he fancied, not Katie, and for some reason I was relieved.

Mason caught on then too.

“Hang on, do you like that one or something? The kit man’s daughter?” Mason asked him.

He had raised his voice a bit in excitement so I gestured for him to speak quieter.

“Yeah only for the last few years, you know.” Billy responded, blushing a bit.

Mason would probably take the piss out of him for the rest of the afternoon and god forbid if Tammy or Jorginho found out, poor Billy would absolutely never hear the end of it.

“Have you ever tried to tell her?” I asked him.

“Only once, but I chickened out because I heard she had a fella” he shrugged.

“When was that?” I pressed.

“Couple of years ago, but then I kept being sent out on loan so couldnae’ really have asked her out any way” he sighed and put his fork down at the side of his plate.

I decided then that I was going to make it my mission to get Billy to ask that girl out. The worst she could say was no and he wouldn’t be any worse off than he was now. I could even use it to my advantage and casually speak to Katie about the two of them.

I looked over at her table again, she looked a little sad.

I had promised myself that I would focus on my career for a bit and not get involved with any girls for a bit, but here I was on day bloody one simping over a girl I’d only just met. I cursed myself for it.