#and turning out by ajr

[poetryinsepiatones]

a letter

to those who will remain unnamed i thank you for my childhood the small clumps of hair we chopped off with safety scissors never really grew back the mud stains never washed out of my socks my knees still scab over from the carpet burn we got together running from growing up somewhere, in the basement, the tinny television set still plays those old reruns and VCRs we forgot to wind back and on some bench there's still the plastic sleeve covered in sticky fingerprints from the juice popsicles that our moms bought when we begged so we could save our favorite flavors for each other i still have the bracelet with your misspelled name strung on the blues you thought were the same shade in the flashlight's beam and in my drawer i have the almost empty notebook titled "Our Summer" with amateur signatures in the top right corner and smiley face beneath them that never got filled when you drove away in june you don't have one name and often i hit myself where you asked to kiss my cheek because i forget one of them and when i remember one i scribble it in crayon on my heart (i always forget that crayon fades like the drawings i helped you with when you were three) now, when i'm the age you were when you would push the swings because i was too short to touch the ground and my shoes would be too big to line up perfectly with your purple ones like you always liked to do i wish you were still here to split your jelly beans wait at sticky bus stops drink bittersweet lemonade and help me forget that one day you would walk off in your hand-me-down pants and take my childhood with you

[chaos-creature-on-the-roof]

HEY AROMANTICS AND ASEXUALS

YOU SHOULD TOTALLY LISTEN TO TURNING OUT BY AJR

[murderthegods]

One thing I really like about I Saw the TV Glow that I don't see people talking about is the specific tone that "there is still time" takes on in it. Lots of people talking about that line ofc, but I see everyone talking about it as though it's unambiguously and only a message of hope.

The obvious thing to take away from "there is still time" is of course that you can still save yourself. As long as you haven't died yet, you still have a chance. You don't have to die like this. You can still live your life. And that's not not the point of the line ofc, but I'd argue it's missing something, and that's that you haven't left yet.

This is the movie about the fear of the known, the horror of there being no monsters, the fear of waiting. And in that context, a message of reassurance that I can afford to wait a little longer is awful! I don't want to wait any longer! I know I'm going to wait for as long as I can, but I want out! Obviously it's better than not having any time at all, but only because that would be the train hitting me. "There is still time" means I'm standing on the tracks like a deer in the headlights, and the train might be miles away but I can see it and I can feel in my bones that I can't move yet - or that I won't - and a voice tells me that I'll be fine, I can afford to stay on the tracks a little longer, it'll be fine, I'm not dying yet, it's fine, there is still time, but every second I still have time is a second I still can't breathe.

I've lived my entire life haunted by deadlines and the lack thereof, and to me the phrase "there is still time" contains just as much dread as the rest of the movie. If there weren't any time, then I could just, I dunno, power through it. I've written enough essays the night before, it's not fun, I hate it actually, but as long as I still have time I know from experience that I'm not going to do it yet. If I were on my deathbed then I could just make my dying words "I was a girl the whole time" and I wouldn't have to deal with any of the consequences because I'd be dead. In a way, that's the easy way out. Which, y'know, is the whole point! If I wait until I don't have any time left to start living, then I almost may as well have not done anything! That's what the movie is scared of.

I do actually have time, it is genuinely fine if I don't do anything right this second, or tonight, or this month, but how many years do I want to let that add up? I don't want to spend another year like this, much less ten! The scary thing isn't the idea of "dying like this" - how I am at the moment of my death is almost immaterial compared to how I am in all the years I'll have before then! The scary thing is every day I spend being like this, and none of them individually are all that scary but all of them is terrifying! I can't believe that I don't have time because it's not true and because then I'd be so paralyzed with fear and despair I wouldn't do anything, but if I actually fully believed that I did have time, I'd do what Owen did!

The more I think about it the more odd it seems that people are latching onto the phrase "there is still time" as a message of hope. It is pretty objectively a true statement in this context and it's even pretty inarguably hopeful, but it's also kinda obviously a phrase that can only be meant to encourage inaction. The point of it is that you don't have to do anything (yet). In a movie that we can all see is clearly about how you need to do something! It's created a fascinating environment where people say "There is still time, so go on hrt today!" seemingly without spotting any contradiction! If there's still time, I may as well start tomorrow, right?

Yes, if you don't believe you have time, if you believe your life is already over, then you're probably not going to do anything to improve it, but equally as much, who would ever take a risk to improve their life now if they think they have all the time in the world?

[randmwizard]

...is turning out part 3 by ajr giving aro/ace-spec vibes to anyone else? because:

'Cause half the time I can't love right And I can't have sex and we both get quiet Boy, I must be one fucked up guy

and

'Cause half the time I can't love right And I'm half yours, and you're all mine

and

Everyone's got it, everyone's got it, everyone's got it all figured out

this is so aspec right?

is it just me?

the vibes? are aspec?

[boyduroy]

I hold you

I hold you closer than I ever knew

I could do

[superiorkenshi]

Need to know wich member of ajr write the turning out song so I can introduce him to the aroace community

[welcome-to-the-neotheater]

turning out trilogy. in my turning out era. turning out pt i my beloved. turning out pt ii my beloved. turning out pt iii my beloved. in my turning out era. turning out trilogy my beloved. AJR my beloved. turning out era. turning out era.

[sealpup9]

Ok Inertia came in swinging with a beat that slaps so hard I forgot to duck and was knocked on my ass by the force that is the last two verses.

[justalitlecreacher]

AJR is for the aromantics and asexuals sorry

[idekrnyall]

I've probably said this before but the turning out trilogy by ajr is so aroace to me... Anyways happy aro visibility week

[glowinginstarlight]

im never going to stop thinking about the outro to turning out pt. iii by ajr. it makes me insane. like what do you mean this series about the uncertainty of love and growing up ends with don't overthink it/one day at a time kid/add up the days you got someone to do life with/love isn't big, kid/it's little and quiet/let's do today/i think you'll turn out to like it how am i supposed to be normal about that. love isn't big its little and quiet. im insane. lets do today i think you'll turn out to like it. hello can anyone hear me. augh

[royalchewy]

Finally got to the next Brozone and AJR piece! I was really struggling with what would fit Bruce the most, all the others I have a pretty concrete idea. Look below if you want to see more about my logic behind the lyrics. Curious what others would have put.

I feel like the last lyrics of Turning out pt.iii are an older Bruce talking to his past self and the rest of the song is how a younger Bruce was struggling with finding a real sense of romantic love. He probably experienced/received a lot of superficial “love” from potential partners until he finally found vacay island. I feel like the whole song could be his struggle to find the true kind of love he has with Brandy.

I think touchy feely fool could also fit Bruce. I think while he has a resentment to JD, he overall still cares deeply for him and all his brothers (These feelings probably increasing after having his own kids).There’s still a sense of hurt feelings he will newer get over, but he also is almost more angry that he isn’t actually angry. Thats how I can see him feeling at least.

[th3b0neguy]

New AJR lyrics that kicked me in the gut this week

“An object in motion, don’t ask where I’m going cause where I am going is right where I am”- inertia

“I wish we were 85. The rest of our life wouldn’t sound scary”- turning out III

“And I’m half yours, and you’re all mine”- Turning out III

Honestly all the Turning out parts kick me in the gut everytime

“I turned 20-something, it didn’t mean nothing. Cause not on of them where there to see”- 2085

Might have to rant about all the connections in the turning out songs later. They are easily the best songs

[hopelessfandomfreak]

so the turning out trilogy has been all about finding the purpose of love and what makes romantic love so special, and turning out pt. iii really was the perfect conclusion to the trilogy.

in the first turning out, we wonder about the difference between platonic and romantic love, and how that changes as you grow up. you may grow out of people you used to love, no matter how much you wish they could stick around.

turning out pt. ii focuses on falling out of love, and wondering if it was ever really love in the first place. if you love someone, shouldn’t that last forever? it’s a hard truth to swallow, and even the lyrics admit “I don’t love it much at all.”

finally turning out pt. iii comes along, and honestly at first the message is a little hopeless. the song focuses on what society has conditioned us to think of love: the point of love is to get married, have kids, and probably get divorced one day, no matter how much you thought you loved each other. it’s bleak.

but it’s not the truth. in the outro of pt. iii, we settle on the true purpose of love. it’s not about having someone unchanging you never outgrow. it’s not about forcing yourself to stay in a relationship just because you think you’re supposed to love someone. and it’s not about marriage and reproduction, and falling into what society expects of couples.

it’s about having someone by your side to get through life with. life is hard, and sometimes all you can do is focus on one day at a time, and even that can be hell. but that’s all so much easier when you have someone by your side, someone you love and trust and who loves and trusts you. love doesn’t have to be this big grandiose thing; in fact, love is “little and quiet.” love is about having “someone to do life with.” I think that’s beautiful, and am more than happy to agree with ryan met’s purpose of love.

[gibbearish]

hello mr ajr nice to meet you ive been listening to your music every day for the last four years and i think it would benefit you greatly to google aromanticism someday. thank you

[lyricalmusingstuff]

LOVE isn't big, kid it's little && quiet. Let's do TODAY. I think you'll turn out to LIKE it.