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#and I can't learn that unless someone comes forward
zorthania · 11 days
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A piece about survivors guilt.
This comic isn't perfect. I started it back in October 2023, and every time I picked up my pen, I wept.
I bring this to you today, on 9/11, in hopes that you reflect on this day a little differently than how most Americans would. Let it move you to continue to boycott, protest and challenge your family, friends and colleagues. You have a bigger impact than you would believe.
Thank you for reading this with an open heart.
From the river to the sea...
I'd like to bring to attention the fact that the figures depicted above are a gross undercount of the actual number of deaths. I scoured the internet high and low to source my findings and not a single one could break down the devastation that befell an individual ethnicity. Instead, they lumped a bunch of ethnicities together, provided a general timeline, and called it a day, reinforcing the sheer scale of dehumanization propagated in the west. The only consistency between all the articles I looked up was the 4.5 to 4.7 million figure I've included above, and even then, they were all published by western media news outlets... the very same that have been so unreliable and complicit in the genocide of Palestinians today. So I have to take everything they say with a grain of salt.
We are not just numbers.
All of us have ambitions and desires and lives worth living.
With that said, this is your friendly reminder to:
Donate an e-sim
Donate to PCRF to provide Palestinian children aid
Donate to Pious Projects to provide woman with feminine hygiene kits
Donate to CareForGaza to provide food to displaced families in Gaza either through their Gofundme or their paypal
Donate to any of the vetted gofundme campaigns on GazaFunds to help Palestinians trying to flee Gaza.
And if you or someone you know sees or experiences a hate crime and can afford it, SUE. This is a more effective use of your money than most realise. The reason zionists act with impunity is because of the normalization of white supremacy and oppression of ethnic minorities. Challenging that in any capacity tells them that there are consequences to their actions and makes them think twice before engaging in hate crimes and helps raise all of us up against the systems currently in place that let them get away with it.
If you can't donate or spend any money, you can:
Do your daily clicks.
Boycott targeted companies on the BDS list (if you're like me and you don't want a single dollar to go towards anything supporting Israel right now, you can use Bdnaash to double check what products are okay to buy, but the BDS list is sufficient as it is a strategic attack and proven very effective thus far)
Flood your representatives emails and voicemails with how you won't be voting for them unless their politics align with an immediate ceasefire in Gaza.
Attend a protest, be LOUD.
Challenge your circle of friends, family and colleagues with conversations about Palestine. (THIS IS THE MOST UNDERRATED AND MOST EFFECTIVE THING YOU CAN DO)
and if you're really up to, be disruptive in any capacity that you can think of towards major corporations benefiting from this onslaught. (i.e. halting military manufacturers from production + shipments, sticking boycott stickers on products at your market etc)
And finally, if your country wasn't mentioned in the above excerpt, it was no deliberate omission on my part and I encourage you to come forward and tell your story about the suffering of your people so that this may be a learning opportunity for everyone.
You are seen.
You are not alone.
Thank you again if you've read this far.
From the river to the sea...
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darcylindbergh · 2 months
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I’m a queer minor with an unsupportive Republican family and I feel so fucking helpless about the election. What can I do or at least how can I stay safe?
listen to me. i am taking your face in my hands. i am looking into your eyes. listen. your second question is the right one. your safety is your priority. have you ever been on a plane? and they do the little safety routine? and when the masks fall down, they say, "put your own oxygen mask on before helping others?"
as a queer kid, this is a put your own mask on before helping others situation.
there are things you can do to get involved but first and foremost, you gotta be safe. if that means you don't come out and you don't talk about politics and you don't get involved in activism until you can be independent, that's what it means. i know it sucks to hear. it really sucks saying it, tbh. i want you to be big and out and loud and proud, and i never want you to have to make yourself small, but more than anything i want you to be safe.
so everything i'm about to say is with this caveat. safety first. your own mask before helping others.
here's a link to the lgbt national youth talkline. this service won't call outside agencies (like 911) on your behalf, unless you're making a credible threat to someone else.
the Trevor Project also has a hotline and chat services. they do call outside agencies on your behalf to report imminent harm to yourself or others as well as reporting child abuse. i'm not saying one is better than the other. i just want you to know what each service does.
the Trevor Project also has trevorspace, which i guess is like social media for lgbt youth? i am not a youth so i didn't sign up to check it out but it could be a good place to find folks to talk and connect with. connections are so good.
here's some things you can do. i tried to include a bunch of things with different amounts of involvement so you can pick your safety level.
read. read so much. read about people who are like you and who are not like you. read fiction that celebrates queer joy and read nonfiction books about antiracism and intersectionality and the history of queer people in the US. do you know who has a cool amount of information on queer history in the US? the national park service. watch queer movies, even (especially, tbh) old ~problematic stuff, look up what people say about it now. read through the articles on decolonizepalestine.com. watch interviews about Black joy. know your rights. read banned books. if you can't do, learn. read. just because it's happening inside your head doesn't mean it's real work.
check out scarleteen, which is a fantastic resource for queer sex ed and relationship information. a lot of their articles are older now, but still 100% great reads.
watch what your family is watching - debates, news stories, whatever - and ask yourself how would i respond to that? look up how to respond to that. you can use this time to start learning how to dissect political speech and how to respond to it. both sides do this! read news from both sides and see how it compares.
make your daily 5 calls. they give you scripts and everything. if you don't want to talk to a real human person, calling in the evening will usually get you a voicemail. talking on the phone is a hugely important social skill - if you don't have it, the 5 calls are a great way to start and to start addressing your discomfort with phones.
20 states allow 17-year-olds to vote in the primaries.
Pre-register to vote if you're eligible.
Vote Forward puts on a letter writing campaign you can participate in.
NextGen America has in-person volunteer opportunities in 8 states, and virtual opportunities globally. Although they target voters 18-35, volunteers can be any age. (hey adults - you listening?)
here's even more information on phone or text banking! for most of these, you don't have to be 18.
Organize a voter registration drive at your high school. the Civics Center has a free, one-hour online workshop that will walk you through how to host a drive and they'll even send you swag for it. check out their "for students" tab - they have sharable graphics, workshops, lots of stuff.
in some states, people under 18 can sign up to be poll workers. (hey adults - we can do this too)
CIRCLE is a civic engagement center that focuses on getting youth out to vote, but also educating folks. check their website out. listen. politics are so boring like, 99.9% of the time. the more you know about how it works, the more effective you can be when you want to get involved.
look up your local political body, find out when they meet. attend the meetings. in my county we have a board of commissioners that meet once a month, and a couple of committees as well. i don't go every time but now that i can log into the meetings via Zoom, I do about every other month or so. did you see that video of violet affleck speaking at the LA board of supervisors meeting? that could be you, babe.
so there's a lot you can do actually! here's some more stuff you can do!!
know, with 100% certainty, in your heart of hearts, that there are so many people who want you to be out and proud and loud and yourself. and there are so many people who are fighting for you to be able to do that. there are so many adults, queer and non-queer, rooting for you, standing up for you, putting ourselves between you and a future where you have to keep making yourself small. and you will get older and i know it's trite but THINGS REALLY DO GET BETTER, and someday you will be the queer adult on this side of the screen protecting kids like you. you gotta keep on keeping on and keeping yourself safe so you can do that someday.
log off. LOG OFF. doomscrolling is a form of self-harm. deliberately seeking out endless articles and tiktoks and whatever about news and information that will upset you is not activism, babe! it's harm! you aren't helping anyone by being hurt. there's a difference between being informed and hurting yourself. find the line. hold yourself to it.
stop using chat gpt. it's terrible. forget you ever knew about it. that's not related to activism its just like, general health, and also climate change. while i'm here, switch to firefox and duckduckgo.
go outside. it turns out touching grass is actually important for our mental health. go find some.
pick up a hobby that does something with your hands, if you're able to. i cross-stitch and play piano (badly). pick up drawing. cooking. embroidery. underwater basket weaving. it's important to find something that shows you what YOU can do with YOUR two hands. you can do so much.
find your people. online, in person. find your people. when i got this ask, i - not a parent - threw it to my people and they helped me find some resources. we're doing this together.
this is kind of silly but i love doing it. find the marriage license announcements in your county or township or whatever and look for gay people. you'll be guessing by names, so watch out - we love trans people who have and haven't made the legal name change! - but GOD. i've looked at the marriage license announcements literally every two weeks (which is how often they're published in my county) since Obergefell v Hodges 9 years ago, which is when we got gay marriage in my state, and it's so fucking healing. in the last 9 years, i have seen hundreds of gay people make this announcement. every two weeks, there are four or five gay couples in my community out of maybe 15, 20 (i live in a pretty small county). look up why marriage rights have mattered so much to our community. these marriage license announcements are just such a small, bright spot of joy and seeing the names - real people! in my real community! - cradles my heart. find what cradles your heart.
this has gotten long enough so i'm going to set it free. i'm sure there will be people in the notes adding things. for you parents out there, leave your love in the comments. for the rest of us extremely cool and suave adults, pick something off the list and volunteer too, and look at this anon and think yes, this is why we do it. kids like us who are kids now, who will be us later. for you Youth out there, put your oxygen mask on first and then help others.
i love you.
it gets better.
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a-hazbin-reader · 1 month
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Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
Part One:
Part Two:
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TW: A little spicy, Valentino jumpscare, Vox being a little pushy, A little Vox X Reader
Description: A BALLROOM DANCE TROPE?!?!?
Alastor heads straight to the one person who he knows can help, someone who claims that romance and love are her specialties
Rosie doesn't even look surprised to see Alastor, in fact, she looks a bit disappointed that he hadn't shown up soon
"Well, well, well~ If it isn't Mr. Casanova himself!"
Her tone is nearly mocking as she ushers Alastor into a more private area, rambling about men being hopeless as she sets the table
"You know... I quite liked Y/N! A shame to see you let them go."
Alastor almost feels like a child under her judgemental gaze, his ears folded flat, and his shoulders drawn up
"Ah... Well, I was actually here to talk to you about that. I'm in the market for some advice on how to...make amends with Y/N."
Rosie immediately perks up, clapping happily as she learns forward in excitement
"Now that I will gladly help with! We just gotta fix you up a smidgen and deal with that emotional constipation of yours!"
"H-hey now!"
You wake up in a room you don't recognize and almost panic until you see Vox coming out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his hips
Can he even shower? Who knows
"Oh, you're finally awake...~"
You feel your face burn as you turn your head away, Vox seemingly shameless about his body as he chuckles and walks around you to grab his clothes
You have to swallow and force your eyes to stay on the wall as Vox walks around behind a thin, nearly see-through, panel and drops the towel
Subconsciously you reach for the bead Alastor had given you to calm your racing heart, only to find that it's missing and guilt overwhelms you
You figure you must've lost it when you were attacked by those thugs and somehow that feels like you lost your last connection to him
You're suddenly brought back to reality when a drop of water trickles down your leg and you look up to see Vox kneeling over you on the bed, a frown on his face
"You alright? You look a little sick still, must be a side effect of whatever those fuckers gave you."
He traces a claw down the side of your face, drawing a shudder from you as you pull the blankets back over your body
"I'm fine... Just a little gross feeling, that's all."
As nice as it feels to receive affection again, especially from someone who seems to genuinely want to give it to you... It feels wrong, Alastor's image flashing in your mind
Vox tuts and moves to the other side of the room, coming back with clothes and a towel for you. You can't help but notice that the clothes are very... VoxTek.
"You'll feel better after a bath, everything you need is right here. Unless you need some help in there~?"
His smirk is positively predatory, pulling you in closer by your face so you're forced to meet his hypnotic gaze. You feel your face burn at the implication
You manage to squeak out a negative and shake your head, pulling away and moving to get up, your legs wobbling under your own body weight
Just before you're about to collapse, Vox catches you, pulling you to his chest with a smug look on his face
"Maybe I could at least help you get there, hm?"
"I-I suppose..."
Once you're alone in the bath, then you feel your mind wandering back to Alastor once again. You wish you would stop pathetically yearning for him
Physically, you were affected by both Vox and Alastor but emotionally... Alastor came out on top no matter which way you cut it
You felt guilty as though you were stringing Vox along even though you tried not to. Now, here he was putting himself out there again for you
Thankfully your legs work again once you're ready to get out, putting on the clothes Vox had given you and stepping out of the bathroom
Only to see the overlord waiting eagerly for you, an almost boyish excitement radiating off of him as he held something out in his hand
You took the old-fashioned looking paper and examined it, the ink still so fresh on it that you could smell it. It reminded you of Rosie, in fact...that was her signature at the bottom
An overlord dance..? What the fuc-
"You should go with me. As my date."
He poses it casually, as if it's just a favor between friends when you both know he's looking for more. Something he wants but you're not sure you can give
"I guess it would be rude to refuse the man who saved me."
He chuckles darkly and wraps an arm around you, collecting a drop of water from your neck with his claw and flicking it away
"Yes, it would be~"
It's the longest, hardest(that's what she said) most difficult week of Alastor's afterlife waiting for the day of Rosie's dance to arrive
He's been rehearsing everything he's going to say to you, especially the part where he apologizes because his mouth refuses to say the words
Alastor's mind is static thoughts of you and the million different ways you might react to him, he doesn't even notice Rosie fretting about the rain and how it's going to ruin everything
"Alastor! This is practically a glass building we're talking about here! How am I supposed to set a romantic mood in the ra-candles! Of course! Lots and lots of candles!"
What if Y/N doesn't show up? No. Mimzy told him in good faith that Y/N would be there, with Vox, but that's something he can deal with
Rosie taps his shoulder, her hands going to her hips as she stares him down.
"And YOU are going to be late if you don't start getting ready right now! Go on now mister!"
It's an awkward ride to the venue with you, Vox, Valentino, and Velvette, plus their dates all crammed into the same limo. The only consolation is that Angel was Valentino's date so you two get to throw each other looks the entire ride
The rain has turned into a downpour, Valentino and Velvette complaining that their outfits/makeup aren't meant for this kind of weather
You're a bundle of nerves by the time the vehicle stops, taking Vox's hand and stepping out. You feel a bit like a celebrity with all the cameras flashing and reporters yelling
The rain has everyone rushing inside so it's not something you get to focus on for long. You and Angel can't help but laugh at how ridiculous it is to watch all the overlords fret over their clothes
But your laughter is cut off when you see Alastor from across the room, the two of you immediately making eye contact and not breaking it. Not even when Vox places a drink in your hand
You hardly break eye contact at all, not when Vox drags you out to the dance floor, your gazes meeting with every spin and twirl
Not even as Vox mingles and parades around with you on his arm, your skin prickles in whichever direction Alastor is. You find yourself migrating closer to him without knowing
Vox is too busy trying to keep Valentino from throwing a tantrum over something stupid to notice that you've wandered away. Angel takes the chance to push you forward suddenly, straight into Alastor
"Go get your man, toots~"
You're too busy falling to notice Niffty darting around in the background and causing chaos over by the Vee's, nipping at ankles and pulling on cords
The moment Alastor's arms wrap around you to catch you, it's as if your entire body has become electric. Alastor smoothly sweeping you onto the dance floor to cover up your fumble
"My dear, you're more lovely than I remember~ Though your outfit could use a little bit more red~"
As much as you've missed him and dreamt about him...you're still hurt.
He laces your fingers together once he feels you start to pull away, his free hand coming to rest on your hip as he spins you gracefully
"Alastor, unless you're going to apologize-"
"I'm trying to, but darling, you keep running from me! I...I hurt you and I'm sorry for that."
You rest your hand against his neck, rubbing your thumb against his pulse and feeling how erratic it is. The only sign that he's nervous right now
"I was so caught up in my feud with Vox that I was blind to how I made you feel...and by the time I realized that I had fallen for you, you wanted me to let you go."
Somehow, he's managed to guide you both to an exit, taking you into an empty hallway and pulling away with a tight smile. If you stare at him hard enough, then you notice that he's blushing
"You love me, Alastor..?"
It's all you can manage to squeak out, the overlord backing you up against the wall as he crowds you in, grabbing your hand and kissing it
"More deeply than I'd care to admit, I'm afraid my heart is in your hands, darling... please be gentle with it."
Being so close to him again, hearing him confess to you, it's all so overwhelming, and all you can do is reach up and touch the beads on the end of his monocle. The familiar feeling of onyx against your fingers helps sooth you enough to find the words
"Do you love me enough to kiss me? Without needing to spite anybody?"
Alastor's entire body shudders in pleasure from the simple touch, drawing you closer to him by your hips and leaning in to brush his lips against your own
"Darling, I love you enough to do so much more than that."
There's a hot fizzy feeling that flows throughout your entire body once he finally kisses you, your arms wrapping tightly around his neck once he licks inside your mouth. One of his hands sliding further down to grab your leg and hike it up as he presses closer, growling at the taste of you as he-
"So I take it you've made your choice, Y/N?"
Vox!
You have to grab Alastor by the back of his hair and yank him off of you so that you can explain yourself, something that Alastor seems to enjoy far too much but that's something to unpack for later
"Vox, I'm so sor-"
He simply holds his hand up to stop you, a slightly annoyed look on his face as he rubs his forehead
"I know when I've been beat. Normally, I don't accept that but I don't want to be anyone's second choice. Though, I do think you're missing out and Alastor? Fuck you."
"Likewise, old pal~"
And just like that, Vox is gone. A small part of you feels guilty, but a greater part of you is relieved that things didn't escalate further
You're brought out of your thoughts by the feeling of Alastor biting your neck, a pleased hum escaping him as you gasp and tug on his hair again
"A-Alastor...take me back home..."
The thought of you coming home, your real home, is a pleasantly sobering one for him and he pulls away to gaze down at you
"That sounds like a beautiful suggestion, darling~ Let's get you home and get you out of these horrid VoxTek clothes!"
"Hey! I picked this out!"
"VoxTek is what makes it so horrible~"
You hug his arm happily as you two step outside, Alastor pulling out an umbrella and holding it over you both. Though you have to really squish together to stay completely dry
The entire walk back is spent kissing and sharing horribly love sick looks with each other. Alastor humming a happy tune and spinning the two of you around occasionally
He stops once you're at the steps of the hotel, pulling you flush against him once again and rubbing your cheek as he leans in to kiss you
It takes forever for you both to pull away, panting softly and making heated eye contact
"Welcome back home, my love~"
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Don't worry about Angel, Niffty ended up causing a fire and they ran out together happily. Valentino's wings caught on fire and Vox found a new pretty thing to fall in love with. Velvette is now invested in everyone's relationship
@deadpoolssweetchimi @milkissesx @yourdoorisunlocked @pinestwinssimp @cinnamon-galaxies @eris-norwega @lil-glum @s0f14224 @chair-made-of-potatoes
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seospicybin · 7 months
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TOO HOT TO HANDLE.
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PART I
I.N x reader. (s)
Too Hot To Handle Masterlist
Synopsis: You and Jeongin become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (12,9k words)
Author's note: Hope you like this one too. Don't forget to leave a feedback x
JEONGIN: I consider myself to be a pretty shy person. People tell me it's an extra charm I have and I learned how to use that to my advantage. My main charm? It's my smile, they work to reel the girls in [smiles] but don't worry, I have better things to show [winks]
-
Jeongin isn't sure that he'll do well as a contestant on a dating show.
It's definitely not about the dating part, it's the 'show' part that he's having a problem with. He doesn't consider himself as somewhat entertaining which is what someone who goes on a TV show should be.
Jeongin knows that he's reserved and quiet, unless he has something important to say, and he gets shy at times. But when it comes to his physical attributes, he doesn't have any problems with it.
He puts on his best foot forward once the staff gives the cue for him to start walking down the pier that leads to a docked boat.
It's the first time he gets to board a big, luxurious boat like this but he keeps his awe to himself knowing that a group of people have been waiting for his arrival.
Jeongin is the last contestant to get on the boat therefore he's aware of the anticipation and the expectations that he has to fill.
Even so, he's not here for that, he's here to have fun and enjoy himself.
"Oh, there he is!" Says the girl who first notices his arrival.
And also, to mingle with these attractive people he's looking at.
"Hello, what's your name?" A girl asks as she gives him a hug with a quick cheek-to-cheek.
"It's Jeongin," he answers.
"I'm Justine," she says.
Justine has blonde hair that flows down her back like a waterfall and a pair of full lips that curve into a flirty smile when he looks at her. One look and he knows that she is the type who knows how to have fun and doesn't mind getting into trouble. Not sure if Jeongin is ready to make mischief with her but he won't rule her out yet.
He quickly shifts his attention to the next girl taking her turn to hug him, she goes for both cheeks and then hands him a glass of bubbly wine.
"You're tall," she beams with a smile.
Jeongin never takes pride in his height but he can't deny that he likes being called tall.
"Thank you," he mutters.
"I'm Linda," she says.
On the contrary, Linda offers a different charm. She is a brunette with a cute smile and a thick British accent, she's looking at him with these big round, eyes and a smile that doesn't wear off her face.
However, the twin mounds on her chest catch his attention and well, he's a man after all so he glances at it just to satisfy his need.
"You have really beautiful eyes," Jeongin compliments her eyes even though he has just looked at her breasts.
"Oh, thank you," Linda says.
Jeongin continues by introducing himself to more girls. There's Francoise, another blondie with gorgeous light blue eyes, Bianca with her long legs and glowing golden skin, and then there's Courtney, who looks like she just stepped out of a swimsuit photo shoot.
"I like your smile and the dimples," Courtney says, her teeth fainty biting her lower lip as she stares at him.
It's only been a few minutes but Jeongin thanks his old self for agreeing to join this show. Never in a million years, did he imagine himself going on a yacht trip with a group of attractive people for the summer.
-
JEONGIN: I'm loving it here. I'm ready to rock the boat! [Grins]
-
Instead of being jealous, Jeongin admires his fellow male contestants for having greater bodies than him.
Especially Keith, he's big and tall, his muscles are toned and his tan skin makes his abs more defined. He must've spent countless hours in the gym to get that body and Jeongin admires him more for that.
"You're ripped," Jeongin mutters in awe at him.
Keith lets out a chuckle and brushes his wavy, brown hair to the back, "Thanks, man."
It's almost empty anyway so Jeongin decides to drain the wine straight from the bottle and he notices that everyone's head is turned. He follows to where everyone is looking then he sees a man standing on the upper deck of the boat who he assumes is the host of the show.
"Ahoy!" He greets.
Everyone is replying with various answers but Jeongin can't respond verbally when his mouth is full of wine, so he claps his hands instead.
"Welcome to my dating show, Love Overboard and I'll be your captain," He introduces himself.
Everyone is cheering and Jeongin hurriedly swallows his drink so he can also show his excitement.
"You're all about to head out on the vacation of a lifetime, and hopefully find love along the way," the captain continues.
Not sure about love but everyone is eager and frisky for this, and Jeongin is no exception. He wonders how the show is going to be because he's already having so much fun and it's only the beginning.
The captain continues with his announcement, "Tonight will be your first beach party of many, and at each party, we'll be picking up a new, sexy single."
There'll be more people joining on board? Jeongin isn't sure about finding love but hearing that, he instantly changes his mind. Maybe it is possible to find love along the way.
"However, there's a catch. There are only five double beds on board so if you don't want to sleep alone, you better pick your shipmate," the captain finishes his speech with a tricky task.
And just like that, the boat starts to sail the sea and everyone is having a round of toast to mark this moment.
"We're going to have so much fun!" Bianca says as she clinks her glass with Jeongin's empty wine bottle.
"Unless I get seasick then yeah, we're going to have fun," He jokingly says.
"I hope not," she says with a crisp laugh.
-
JEONGIN: There are already so many hot people on board. I don't think I can take anymore [laughs]
-
The males somehow gathered at the top deck, having another bottle of champagne pop open and a toast. Then the talk begins, well, you guessed it, it's about the girls.
Or in Kurt's words, the birds.
"Tell me about the birds!" He says, asking everyone for, what Jeongin assumes, girls they fancy.
Keith leans back on the sofa and brushes his brown locks, being the first to share his choice, "It's Francoise for me, she's on the top of the list," he says.
"She's fit, yeah," Mick comments, then sips his wine.
With the strong winds, Kurt decides to tie his dirty blonde hair into a low man bun, "I'm going to put myself on a race with you then," he says to Keith with a mischievous smile on his face.
"I always go for blondes so it's also Francoise for me," he remarks.
Jeongin smells competition between the two and he can't decide who to root for, they're both well-built and good-looking.
"How about you, Damon?" Kurt asks.
"I want to have some fun so for now, I want to keep my options open," Damon coyly answers, his braided curls also swinging with every gust of wind.
Jeongin sips his wine as he intently listens to the conversation going on and he almost chokes on it when Kurt slaps his knee with his big hand.
"Jeongin, my man, how about you?" He asks.
He allows himself to swallow his drink first and decides to give everyone the safe answer, "Uhm... same with Damon."
Not going to lie, Jeongin gets a little tipsy from chugging the champagne bottle earlier so it's wise that he stops drinking. He puts his drink away and focuses on giving everyone a proper answer.
"They're all beautiful but I don't want to be haste and put all the eggs in one basket," he honestly answers.
Kurt and Mick are nodding to his answer while the rest are not saying anything but seem to agree with him as well.
Jeongin glances down at the lower deck to where the girls are gathered and indeed, they're all beautiful. The girls are all beautiful in their own way and have their own distinct charms so he can't tell who he fancies the most only from their looks.
-
JEONGIN: It's hard having to try and choose between five girls right now so I'm not going on a chase yet, I'd rather see who approaches me.
-
The sea is so blue, so vast that it goes as far as his eyes can see.
Jeongin enjoys the view from the front of the boat with the wind blowing his shirt away and sending his dark hair flying, making it a mess that he has to brush it to the back.
He's not aware that someone is there until he's standing next to him.
"Hi," the girl says.
With the surface of the water reflecting the sunlight at him, he has to squint his eyes to see who it is. It's the brunette girl with hazel eyes, Linda.
"Oh, hi," he greets back.
"How are you?" She asks while holding all of her hair on one shoulder.
"Good. How are you?" Jeongin asks back, liking the shape of her body which is lean yet toned in the right places.
"Better now," she answers with a bright smile.
Linda then looks out at the view and inhales the salty air, then lets out a delightful sigh.
"Beautiful isn't it?" She says.
"Yeah," Jeongin also sighs as he takes in the picturesque view.
Then Linda turns her body to the side facing him with a smile that slightly turns into a flirty one, "Then how about me?"
It takes no genius that she's fishing a compliment out of him so he gives it to her, "I think you're beautiful."
Linda's smile grows wider on her small face, she brings her hand close to her mouth and tugs a finger between her teeth, looking at him with wild glints in her eyes.
After a moment, she speaks again, "I feel like we've got a vibe going on, yeah?"
It's only been a moment so Jeongin can't decide if he should agree with what she said but to be polite, he lightly nods at that.
"What is your type?" She asks.
Whenever someone asks him that, he gets confused. He does have a few things he's looking for in someone but it's always changing from time to time.
"I don't have too much of a type," Jeongin answers.
"Okay, so anything that breathes, huh?" Linda jokingly says with a low laugh.
"In that case, I ticked it off the box," she jokes again.
Jeongin laughs along with her. He has to admit that she does have a sense of humor, not too much, just perfect.
She leans in closer and lowers his voice, "I've got a secret," she mutters.
That gets him intrigued and somehow, he follows suit and lowers his voice as he asks, "Yeah? What's that?"
"You're probably my number one to share a bed with tonight," she says, putting shyness into her flirty smile and it somehow works on her.
She bites on her finger again and sheepishly asks, "What do you think?"
"Sharing a bed with you would be nice," he sweetly says.
"You want to share a bed with me?" Linda asks with her eyes wide and hopeful, telling him to say yes.
It was only a moment ago that Jeongin decided not to choose anyone yet but Linda makes him falter a little that he has to remind himself about his initial plan.
"Let's see," Jeongin settles on a vague answer.
Not hard to tell that Linda doesn't like the answer Jeongin gave from the way her eyes dim even though her smile remains wide and bright.
The sound of the water splashing shatters the silence and Jeongin looks to the side of the boat to see that Kurt has just jumped into the sea for a swim.
"I think I'll join them," Linda says while fixing the straps of her bikini.
She walks away to go to the back of the boat and stops after a few steps to look over her shoulder to ask Jeongin, "Are you coming?"
"I'll catch up later," he says.
-
JEONGIN: Linda is flirty and sweet. We had a good chat, there's a potential there but I want to see how this unfolds.
-
Instead of swimming in the sea, Jeongin goes to the upper deck and gets into the jacuzzi that has been set to keep the water warm at all times.
The rose petals are bubbling along with the water as he leans back and enjoys the pleasant afternoon. It hasn't sunk in yet that he'll probably be having these kinds of days for the next three weeks.
"Do you mind if I join you?" Someone asks.
Jeongin snaps his head in the direction of the voice and finds Justine there. Girls are coming to him one by one, he should consider this his lucky day.
"Not at all," he responds.
Justine ties her long blonde hair into a messy ponytail before slowly getting herself into the tub and sitting next to him, sending the water level rising but not enough to slosh out of the tub.
She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and smiles at him, "You know as soon as I saw you coming, I just know that you're the one I'd go for," she says.
Justine doesn't even bother to small talk first and Jeongin likes the directness in that since he's a very straightforward person.
"I get that feeling that we're going to match well," she adds.
Jeongin doesn't know how to answer that. A part of him wants to entertain that idea but another part of him doesn't want to give her false hope so he ends up responding with a smile.
"I like that you're a bit shy," she says with a giggle.
And that sends Jeongin's hand touching his ear, a habit he does whenever he gets shy.
Justine plays with the petals by scooping them in her hand, "Do you like blondes?"
"Not really, actually," Jeongin says, again, he's a very straightforward person.
Thankfully, Justine takes it well and uses it to her advantage, "Well, you're to love blondes after this."
Justine knows how attractive she is and how to use it as a weapon, every little thing she does is indeed attractive.
But Jeongin firmly stands his ground, "You're going to have to persuade me," he says with a half smirk.
Justine licks her lips and brightly smiles, "It's not much persuading, really."
Her boldness amuses him so much that Jeongin cracks a sonorous laugh.
-
JEONGIN: Justine is oozing with confidence and I dig that.
-
The ripples on the water tell Jeongin that Justine may have subtly moved closer and he's right, he finds her sitting close next to him in the tub.
Once the laughs die down, Justine tilts her head to the side and seductively asks, "Okay, maybe I can persuade you a little bit," she mutters.
He knows what would happen if he turns his head to the side but something in him tells him to do it and his intrusive thought always wins.
The moment he turns his head, Justine grabs his chin to hold him still so she can pleasantly leans in for a kiss. Once she captures his lips, she moves her hand to the nape of his neck as she keeps kissing him.
Jeongin needs a second to calibrate himself into the kiss as Justine keeps his tongue busy by twirling it with hers. He places his hand on her neck and that way, he can angle her head as he pleases and deepen the kiss.
There's nothing but the smooching sound and the sound of the water bubbling in the tub. For a moment, Jeongin lets himself immersed in the kiss then slowly pulls away after sensing that Justine is running out of breath.
As expected, Justine gasps for air the moment he lets go. She's letting out a chuckle and he guesses it's out of triumph.
"Was it a good persuading?" She asks
"Not bad, yeah," Jeongin plays it cool when it's in fact, a really good kiss and he has to look away to resist the urge to go for another.
Justine wades the water around her with her hand, "So what's the bed situation for tonight?"
It seems like he comes close to a decision but he wants to keep it for later because who knows? Maybe someone else will come his way and change his mind.
"Tonight, you'll know," he tells her.
"I think I know the answer already," she says with a triumphant smile.
-
JEONGIN: Somehow I pulled off getting two out of five girls to want to sleep on my bed and deciding on one is hard [chuckles] but there's no harm in that, right? [Raises eyebrow]
-
It's going to be the first party tonight.
If there's one thing that Jeongin takes seriously, it's his fashion. He doesn't just put on something together, he's dressed to impress.
It's not even about the fact that there'll be a new single tonight but that's just how he is. He likes building an outfit and puts so much effort into doing it.
He chooses dark jeans and a printed shirt as the top, he has his hair pushed to the back and leaves a few strands falling over his forehead. Not forgetting to decorate his hands with metal rings that flatter his skin tone and highlight his long fingers.
And now, he's ready to step into the night.
The captain leads the group down a path right after the boat docked not far away, carrying a torch as a source of light. He takes us to a backyard of what looks like a villa but it's too dark to know for sure.
"I promised you the holiday of a lifetime so welcome to your first beach party!" The captain says as he takes the steps as his center stage.
Everyone is looking their best and excitedly cheering in response to him.
"Let's get it started!" The captain shouts, pointing to the beach where the fireworks go off and light up the sky.
The next thing he knows, everyone is partying. The music is blasting, there are fire dancers, and drinks are being passed around and constantly refilled.
Everyone is having fun and getting frisky while at it, especially for Damon and Bianca who share a passionate kiss in between dances.
The captain takes center stage once again and he guesses it's time for the new single revelation.
"Great party, right?" He asks with a wide grin on his bearded face.
Everyone is replying with various answers but they all agree that it is a great party and it's just one of many.
"What do you say we make it even better?" The captain asks.
"Yes!" Courtney enthusiastically shouts from next to him.
"This is going to blow your mind. It's time to introduce you to a new, hot sexy single!"
The captain slowly retreats from where he stands as the place goes dark and Jeongin only notices it now that the dancers are already leaving.
It suddenly turns dark and a spotlight appears on a curtain, heightening everyone's anticipation to see the new single entering the show.
When the curtain finally drops, there's no one there but a cone on top of a small table.
"No!!!" Courtney aggressively shouts out of spite.
"No! I came here for dick!" Bianca screams, almost hysterical with both hands holding the sides of her head.
The party turns into a frenzy while Jeongin is scratching his head, and doesn't understand why everyone starts breaking down over what looks like an air freshener to him.
-
JEONGIN: The new, sexy hot single is a cone. A cone?!
-
"Hello, everyone."
It's when the cone starts talking that Jeongin knows it's not an air freshener but he's still confused why everyone is groaning in complaint.
"I am Lana. Love Overboard has hit the rocks and you're now washed up on Too Hot To Handle."
Jeongin is still oblivious to the fact that the show has changed to what he believes is still a dating show only that it has changed its name.
"I didn't sign up for this," Kurt cries, fisting his hair in distress.
Then Jeongin sees that Damon has dropped to his knees, crying. He taps on his shoulder to check, "Are you crying?"
But Damon is too bust pulling at his hair to even answer his question.
"You all have been selected because meaningless flings mean more to you than genuine relationships," the cone continues talking.
"The fuck?" Mick curses, offended.
Francoise clicks her tongue and coyly shrugs, "Who cares about emotional relationships?"
"Since your arrival, I have been gathering data on your behavior."
Justine snorts and flips her hair, "I hope you like what you saw, Lana!"
Jeongin hopes everyone else quiets down so he can hear the rest of what the cone has to say so he knows how to properly react to it.
"But from now on, you must adhere to my retreat rules."
So it's not a dating show? It's a retreat? And there are rules? Jeongin doesn't remember them saying something about it when he signed the contract.
"No kissing."
"What's going on?" Bianca meekly says, rubbing her temple erratically.
"No self-gratification."
"What's that?" Jeongin asks with a perplexed look on his face.
Keith who happens to standing nearby answers the question for him "No rubbing one out, mate," he says along with a hand gesture for a visual aid.
"That's lowkey sick," Jeongin blurts out.
Not allowed to touch his own body part? What kind of rules is that?
"That's not even funny," Kurt comments with an exasperated sigh.
But everyone hasn't heard the worst of it all.
"And no sex of any kind," Lana delivers the last rule they have to follow in the retreat.
"Is that even healthy?" Kurt comments again, completely flabbergasted.
-
JEONGIN: Can we... unplug her or something?
-
Jeongin gets it now why everyone is simultaneously going on a mental breakdown.
This summer isn't what he expected it to be, one where he imagined he would meet and mingle with attractive people and you know, get lucky.
Then the cone comes and shatters his dreams with those rules. Now he's going into a meltdown on his own.
"As a reward for the progress you make, I have allocated a prize of $200,000," Lana announces.
Everyone else is happily exclaiming at the announcement of the sum of money they would win out of this show.
"Two hundred racks, bro!" Damon grins and his tears seem to have magically dried at the mention of money.
"That's a lot of money," Kurt comments, also reacting differently once he hears of the prize money.
On the other hand, the information isn't enough to console him. He is still reeling from the harsh reality that this is not the summer that he dreamed of.
"Welcome to my retreat and Welcome to your long, hard, sexless summer!" Lana finishes.
-
JEONGIN: The money is tempting but breaking rules is so fun, you know [smirks]
-
As everyone is doing a tour around the villa, Jeongin couldn’t help but think that it’s unfair for Lana to gather a group of hot singles, and make everyone live together in a gorgeous villa only to be told that they can’t do sexual things.
The swimming pool, the hot tub, the firepit… All these cool places and he is not allowed to kiss anyone anywhere. This is so fucking unfair. He should have followed the captain and boarded the boat to get him home.
However, the captain is right about one thing though. There are only five beds in the bedroom and there are ten people, so everyone needs to find a bedmate.
Jeongin randomly chooses a bed and dives right onto it, feeling how bouncy and comfortable it is as he lies on it. These fucking beds and no one is allowed to fuck on it, so fucking- Fuck!
He completely forgot about the bed situation and that he has not yet decided on who he wants to share the bed with which explains why Linda keeps glancing his way from the bed across his. He then slowly turns his head to find the blonde-haired girl and as expected, Justine is uneasily looking his way too.
Jeongin puts his hands behind his head and starts thinking. He can usually solve it by keeping both girls happy but he can’t do that here, right? He has to decide on one.
-
JEONGIN: I have to pick one out of two great girls. What am I going to do?
-
 Justine and Linda, they’re both physically appealing to him so it has to come down to who will get along well with him.
Jeongin is touching his ear as he recalls the interactions he had with those two girls to help him decide. Linda has a good chat and a sense of humor, she’s someone he can have night talks with. On the other hand, Justine is fun and confident, she’s someone who won’t mind doing mischief with him or worse, leads him to temptations.
In conclusion, Linda is the safest choice for him, not that he doesn’t want to rule break with her but she’s the type that avoids rule-breaking instead of encouraging it.
But does Jeongin want to play safe? Like… what’s the fun in that? Jeongin thinks that he has come to a verdict.
“Hey, Justine,” he calls for her.
Justine seems to have expected him to call her name and looks over her shoulder to look at him, “Yes?”
“What are you doing there?” he asks her.
He then pats the space next to him on the bed and says, “Your bed is here.”
“Okay,” Justine triumphantly smiles, not wasting time to get on his bed, and crawls over to sit next to him.
Jeongin secretly peers over to Linda who’s looking rather disappointed that he didn’t choose her. In all honesty, he has his reasons for choosing Justine but he believes Linda wouldn’t want to hear it.
“I think she’s upset,” Jeongin lowly mutters at Justine.
Justine looks around the room to see who he talked about, “Who?”
He covers his mouth so no one can read his lips as he says, “Linda.”
Justine doesn’t look right away but when she finally does, she nods in agreement.
In another part of the room, the battle for Francoise has been won by Kurt as she chose him as her bedmate and Keith has to share the bed with Linda. Everyone might as well call it the bed of the defeated.
-
JEONGIN: I mean, I don’t mind taking Linda in my bed too if she is keen to join us [Chuckles]
-
Jeongin is still forcing his eyes to open when the cone lights up and chimes in the middle of the room.
"Good morning, everyone."
"Morning, Lana," Justine croaks from next to him, clutching the duvet to her chest.
Everyone else is still as sleepy with their bare faces and eyes heavy with sleep. Definitely, not in the mood to hear Lana as as the first thing to hear after they wake up.
"The goal of my retreat is to teach you how to form deep and meaningful relationships. To do that, you have to be able to put the needs of others before your own. Especially when you are horny."
Okay, Jeongin gets it. Breaking the rules means that not only does he lose money but also means, he chooses to act selfishly on the group.
"Good luck," Lana concludes her morning greeting.
Well, last night was overwhelming and Jeongin was too tired to even do anything. He fell asleep almost immediately as Justine snuggled up to him.
"Respectfully, I hate that fucking cone, bro," Kurt states from the bed at the other end of the room.
Mick drinks from his water tumbler, then observes everyone with his piercing, brown eyes.
"Got a question though," he says, putting away his tumbler on the bedside table, "Did anyone break a rule?"
It seems like Mick has just voluntarily become the chief and making sure everyone is adhering to the retreat rules.
He takes a look around the room and sees everyone's faces one by one. He puts more suspicion on couples who are a little more established.
"Kurt?" Mick asks.
Kurt shrugs his question away and Francoise confirms it with a verbal answer, "Nah."
Mick shifts his suspicion onto the next person, "Jeongin?
Jeongin calmly brushes his hair to the back, "I literally fell asleep when Justine and I were still talking," he shares.
Justine is nodding next to him because she knows that it's true, "Last night with Lana... that was intense," she adds.
Mick moves to the next on his suspicion list, eyeing the bed across from him which is Damon and Bianca's bed.
"Damon?"
"Nothing," Bianca speaks for both of them.
Jeongin wouldn't believe these people right away and he knows a lying face when he sees one. One or two of these people are lying to the group but he won't play the saint as well.
It's still early to tell that he won't stumble and break any rules.
-
JEONGIN: I share a bed with Justine and there’s a sexual tension there but honestly, it’s just too early to be hated by a group of people [chuckles]
-
The boys are already cooling down when Jeongin gets to the beach to work out.
Kurt is lying down with his beads of sweat glistening under the pale morning sun while Keith is still doing some lifting and then there's Mick who sits on the mat, brushing his damp hair to the back.
"You guys are already done?" Jeongin asks as he starts stretching his body.
"Uh-huh," Kurt answers while panting.
Mick wipes his sweaty face and turns to sit facing everyone, "I really want us to listen to what Lana is saying. Does anybody else agree? Or am I alone on this?" He suddenly asks a critical question.
Without looking at him, Kurt talks with his eyes closed and hands folded on his abdomen, "I just don’t see how you can make a connection without physical touches. That’s impossible."
"You can cuddle," Keith says in between his grunts of labor.
"Oh yeah, but sometimes that’s not enough," Kurt hits back then peers over at Keith.
Jeongin thinks that Keith is secretly not wanting anything to happen between Kurt and Francoise but Kurt is quick enough to see his intention.
"What’s the longest you went without having sex or you know, getting off?" Mick casually asks like he didn't just ask when is the last time anyone rubs one out.
Kurt purses his lips as he thinks, "Uhm... Like a week?"
Mick surely doesn't expect to hear that answer and Jeongin personally could do a month without a release, especially with money at stake.
But there are hot girls in the equation here and that's what makes it hard to solve.
"If you think about it, you can connect with someone without sex," Mick says.
Instead of giving Mick's wisdom words seep in, Kurt immediately shoots it down with his pessimism.
"I don’t know, man."
Keith puts down his dumbbells and wipes the sweat on his forehead with his t-shirt, "It’s a great idea but uh…" he seems to doubt Mick's words as well.
Jeongin steps in to be the one accepting Mick's words even though he also doubts that's how it works.
"We’ll see where this goes," he says with a pat on Mick's shoulder.
-
JEONGIN: Justine and I have got a bit of a naughty vibe going on. I'm afraid it's just a matter of time before we break the rules.
-
Justine notices that Jeongin has just showered when he enters the dressing room.
She's done doing her makeup and offers to dry his hair for him. Jeongin doesn't see any harm in that so he sits on her chair and lets her do it.
"I'm a makeup artist, I'm good at this," she convinces for the last time, then turns on the hair dryer.
The constant humming of the hairdryer fills the space and while Justine is doing what she does best, Jeongin observes the makeup tools scattered on the vanity right in front of him.
He picks them up one by one and guesses what their use is, when in doubt, he shows it to Justine and asks, "It's an eyelash curler, isn't it?"
Justine looks at him through the rectangular mirror, "Yes."
He continues his exploration through Justine's makeup pouch and takes out the one that interests him. He opens a tube but instead of a cap, he finds a wand with a spoolie at the end of it.
"Is it for eyelashes? Mascara, isn't it?"
Justine turns off the hairdryer and uses a hairbrush next, "No, that's for the eyebrows."
He notices the difference between the two, the one for the eyebrows has a smaller spoolie.
Done brushing his hair, Justine gives the back of his head a quick ruffle to add volume. She then takes a moment to appreciate her work.
"You have soft, fine hair," she compliments.
When she looks at him, she notices that Jeongin is very much intrigued by her makeup. She lightly chuckles and takes it from him.
"This is how you use it," she says, demonstrating how to use it.
To get a closer look, Justine slightly bends down as she applies something to his eyebrows while Jeongin can only watch through the mirror.
"It needs a trim," she mutters as she moves to the other eyebrow.
Justine then jams the wand back into the tube and looks at him to check on his work. She wipes the excess with his thumb.
"Hey, hey, hey!
Mick's jarring voice startles Justine so that she accidentally pokes Jeongin's under eyes with her long nails.
"What are you guys doing?"
Justine sucks air through her teeth and spins around on her feet, "We're doing nothing," she innocently answers.
Mick stands at the end of the long vanity table and props his hands on it, "This is my money you're playing with," he says, already taking ownership of the prize money.
"I promise you, we were just talking," Jeongin assures him while checking himself in the mirror for what Justine did to his eyebrows and he likes it.
Mick purses his lips in doubt and drops his head to the side, "I want to know if I can trust you," he says.
Justine grabs his hand and takes it for a handshake, "You can trust us," she says.
"Okay," Mick says as he shakes her hand, signifying that he chooses to trust her.
That seems to work to convince him but not enough to keep his laser eyes away from both of you.
"I'm watching y'all," he says as he walks backward to the doorway.
After Mick left, Justine plops onto the chair next to his and picks up a hairbrush to comb her hair with.
"We shook on it but I was like... fuck it," she says with a giggle.
She is what he expects her to be, a girl who thinks that the rules are meant to be broken and it's low-key hot, but also a bit threatening. Jeongin is not ready for the repercussions.
"If we break the rules, we would have the whole team against us," he says, reminding Justine that everyone is going to be pissed about it.
She abruptly stops combining her hair as if she just came to her senses. She then looks at him and cracks a smile, "You’re the good one out of the two of us," she says.
And Jeongin e can't tell if she means it in a good way or a bad way.
 -
JEONGIN: If it were up to Justine, we would break rules already but I don’t want to be the first.
-
Before the dressing room gets crowded with everyone getting ready for the night, Jeongin hurriedly goes to the bedroom once he's done dressing up.
Damon is also there, lying on his bed and drinking wine. To pass the time, Jeongin casually chats with him, and in the midst of it, the cone chimes.
Jeongin's head snaps toward the source of the sound, "Damon and Jeongin," Lana calls their names.
Jeongin presses his lips together into a thin line and exchanges a panic glance with Damon.
"Yes, Lana?" Damon asks with his wine glass hanging mid-air.
"Can you please gather everyone in the cabana?" Lana requests.
Jeongin gets up from his bed without saying anything and goes straight to the dressing room to tell everyone. From the sheer shock on their faces, he senses that someone has messed up.
"Anyone have any ideas why we’re here?" Mick says, putting on his detective hat the first thing everyone settles on their seats.
"Could be Lana going to throw another party for us?" Linda wildly guesses with an innocent look on her face.
Mick doesn't take that answer and squints his small eyes as he asks the important question, "Did someone break the rules?"
The silence that passes answers his question and he sighs, disappointed that the group chooses to hide their lies instead of owning up to it immediately.
"Let’s just hear what Lana says," Keith says.
Keith's words summon her, the cone chimes not long after, and instead of her usual greeting, she goes straight into the business.
"This morning I asked you all to start putting the needs of the group ahead of your own. It seems that my request fell on deaf ears."
Even though she talks in the same robotic voice, everyone knows that she's upset that someone is indeed fucked up.
"Oh, shit! She’s pissed," Kurt says, making it clear to everyone.
Mick gets serious this time, clasping his hands together and dropping them between his legs, he asks again, "Did anyone break the rules?"
The silence answers his question again and he lets out a heavy sigh, not accepting the fact that they choose to remain silent when Lana clearly said that someone has broken the rules.
-
JEONGIN: Everyone is just lying at each other’s faces [shakes head]
-
"Jeongn and Justine?" Mick glares at him.
Jeongin can calmly deny his allegation and say, "No."
"You sure? A hundred percent?" Mick asks again.
Justine nods at him and answers it for him, "You can move on and ask someone else."
Mick goes to the next person who sits on the smaller sofa on the side of the room, "Francoise and Kurt?"
They remain quiet and then Francoise starts to scratch her neck, silently gulping air and constantly avoiding everyone's eyes. Everything she does gives away the answer.
"This is the time to fess up," Mick says, either trying to press on them or encourage them.
"We uh... we..." Kurt is blabbering, he's looking anywhere but not the people he's talking to.
"I'm going to be honest, we did a little kiss," Francoise calmly says.
Both Mick and Keith drop their heads onto their hands but it's for two different reasons. Mick is obviously devastated about the money while Keith is well, he just lost another battle against Kurt.
"I needed a goodnight kiss then we fell asleep after so..." she explains.
"Yeah, right," Keith lowly mutters out of spite.
"And I'm going to have to be honest again," Francoise is not finished with her confession yet.
"Oh... fuck!" Linda breathlessly gasps with her hand rubbing her temple.
"We also had another kiss down the beach," Francoise admits another sin.
Everyone is exclaiming, not expecting that this posh girl who always looks calm and collected is breaking rules left and right.
"You had two kisses and it's only day one?" Justine says but instead of sounding like she's scolding her, Jeongin catches a hint of jealousy in her voice.
Mick is left speechless that he can only turn his head side to side like he's watching a tennis match but in this case, Francoise and Kurt are playing with his money instead of a tennis ball.
"Francoise and Kurt, under normal circumstances, each kiss would cost $3,000. Unfortunately, these are not normal circumstances," Lana announces another bad news.
Mick's eyes widen in horror at the mention of how much money they could have lost and it's going to cost a lot more worse than that.
"Earlier today when I asked you all to put the needs of the group before your own, I implemented a covert test."
Linda dramatically gasps, then immediately shut her mouth with her hands.
"Unfortunately, you have failed this test. Furthermore, all fines have been doubled."
"Unbelievable..." Mick sighs into his hands.
It's bad news after bad news and Jeongin should be relieved that he's not a part of the cause but it doesn't make him feel better either.
"Any rules that have been broken since arriving at my retreat will now cost the group twice as much," Lana furtherly informs.
"Wow!" Jeongin's eyes widen in surprise.
"That’s a big chunk of money," Linda innocently comments.
"Francoise and Kurt, your two rule breaks have cost the group $12,000."
Lana drops another bad news right away, not giving everyone a moment to recover from the previous ones.
-
JEONGIN: It's just... brutal [sighs]
-
"Regrettably, the other couple has been more selfish," Lana spoils that there's another rule breaks no one knows of.
This has been overwhelming for everyone and Linda may have run out of patience with anyone who keeps quiet about their rule breaks.
"If you have any respect, you'll be honest with us," she says, a little upset that she gets to suffer from someone else's actions.
"Can anyone please tell the truth!" Mick desperately begs, having no other way how to get anyone to admit to their wrongdoings.
"It's us," Damon finally comes forward, "we kissed in the firepit earlier."
Mick has nothing else to say but to hear how much money has been lost to another reckless behavior.
"Your rule break has cost the group a further $6,000," Lana informs.
Jeongin calculates it roughly in his head and if everyone keeps this reckless behavior for the next three weeks, nothing will be left in the pot.
"We’re going to be broke," he mutters to Keith who sits next to him.
"The prize fund now stands at $182,000," Lana updates.
-
JEONGIN: Now, I'm so glad that I wasn't the first to break the rules.
-
Mick can't hide his disappointment even when it's bedtime. He gets on the bed and tucks himself in, he keeps his head turned away from everyone.
"Oh, I’m so mad," he says, not holding back in letting everyone know that.
Justine cringes in horror at Jeongin while everyone else stays quiet the whole night, unlike the previous night when everyone loudly chatted to each other until the lights turned out.
It's like the temperature in the room drops a few degrees after that reveal in the cabana and drops a few more when the lights are off.
But that is when Jeongin feels most alarmed because things could happen in the dark.
Justine's hand slides across his chest and then she rests it on his shoulder where he can feel the tip of her sharp nails on his skin.
"Your skin is so soft," she compliments with a smile that could be heard as she rests her head close to his.
"So is yours," he compliments back.
Based on profession, there's no doubt Justine knows how to take care of her body well. Her skin is smooth, her hair is soft and she always smells good. There's no denying that she is beautiful and she could easily tempt him when she wants to.
As his thoughts are busy wandering, Justine places her hand on his jaw and starts caressing his cheek. It's the way that her fingers inching closer to his lips that makes his heart rate elevates.
"Don't you think that we'll eventually rule break?" She asks out of the blue.
Jeongin has the same thought as well but after what happened tonight and how everyone reacted to rule breaks, he has second thoughts about committing one.
"Yeah, but I think now is not the right time," he simply refuses.
"Fair enough," she says.
A moment later, Justine's face is hovering inches away above him. She stares right into his eyes long enough that Jeongin can see the naughty intent behind her eyes.
She then leans in and Jeongin has his hands ready to push her away when he needs to. But Justine goes for his cheek and places a soft kiss on it.
"Goodnight," she mutters once she pulls away then lays back on her side of the bed.
-
JEONGIN: Why am I here? How the fuck I ended up in Too Hot To Handle? [clicks tongue]
-
A couple of days have passed uneventfully.
Everyone is still reeling from the fines that have been doubled thus making them more cautious around each other.
Jeongin thinks that it's only a matter of time before someone breaks the rules again.
You can take the player out of a game but you can't take the game out of a player, that's just how it is.
For Jeongin personally, he doesn't have any problems following the rules, except when Justine starts doing something. However, she has been behaving well and maybe she's doing her own thing but he doesn't want to look too much into it.
There's someone else that has been giving him the eyes lately. After Jeongin chose Justine over her, he thought that Linda had already gotten over him but apparently, she's not.
He reckons it's probably because he hasn't broken the rules with Justine yet and that makes Linda think she still has another chance with him.
That's not entirely wrong though, Jeongin isn't going to close on a chance of getting to know someone else.
"Hi. You okay?" Linda asks, appearing from inside the villa and joining him on the terrace.
"I'm okay," he answers, brushing his damp hair from showering, "you?"
Linda sits on the wooden chair next to his and puts her legs up with her body facing him, "I think I'm good."
Jeongin smiles hearing her cute giggle at the end of her answer, she offers different charms than the other girls here.
"I like your dimples," she says, tugging her finger between her teeth again.
"Thank you," Jeongin mutters his gratitude with a smile.
Linda holds his gaze and says, "It's one of the many things I like about you."
Jeongin's hand flies to his ear, touching it as he leans back on his chair and tries not to look into Linda's eyes because they're rather dangerous.
"What was it?" She asks, dangling her legs on the armrest of the chair.
"What did you say the uhm... your favorite feature on me?"
Jeongin has to rake his brain to remember that day, he remembers looking at Linda's breasts when he said a totally different thing.
"Your eyes," he finally answers with a sheer doubt.
"People normally say it's my boobs," Linda says with a crisp laugh.
Now that she said it, Jeongin's eyes automatically flick down at her cleavage and quickly look away.
"They're alright," he coyly says, trying to remain calm even though he knows Linda caught him looking at it.
"You haven't looked, have you?" She jokingly says, putting all of her hair to the back.
"Nah, it's the first time I looked," he jokes back.
Without looking, Jeongin knows that he's profusely blushing and his ears are reddening, his hand comes to the rescue, rubbing it to give him a sense of ease
On the other hand, Linda is enjoying every second of it.
"About you and Justine," she carefully says.
"Are you guys like in a thing or...?"
Linda's eyes are small and warm brown, however, the way she looks at him is piercing like daggers. Jeongin knows that the conversation will eventually get to this.
"We're still getting to know each other but we're also doing our own thing... I'm not stopping her from getting to know anyone," Jeongin answers.
"But do you think it has the potential to be a relationship or more like... friendship-ish type of thing to you?" She asks, biting her finger again.
"Well, uhm..." Jeongin has no answer to that yet, he's been grasping things around Justine and is not sure what he wants to do with it yet.
"I don't know, honestly. I just don't want to rule out any possibilities yet," he adds.
Linda nods and bites her lower lip, "Have you ever thought that you have more potential with someone else?"
"Could be," he coyly says.
She props a hand under her chin and looks at him with a soft gaze, "How about with me?"
Jeongin cracks a smile, not expecting Linda will be this bold. Somehow, he likes this use of subtle aggressiveness.
"We'll see..." Jeongin keeps his cool and stares back into her eyes as he says it.
"Well, you'll see," Linda says.
-
JEONGIN: Linda, Linda, Linda... she's being all cute and flirty, trying to make my head turn.
-
Linda's game doesn't just end there.
In the dressing room while everyone is getting ready for the night, she puts on a dress and checks herself in the mirror, then all of a sudden turns to him and asks.
"How do I look?"
Jeongin has to check for the people around him, thinking that she is talking to someone else.
"Uh... good," he shortly answers.
"Just good?" Linda asks again.
She's so bold for doing it in front of everyone. Worse is Justine is in the room too and Jeongin keeps actively telling his brain not to look her way.
Linda takes a step closer toward him and spins around on her feet, "Do you like the dress or should I put on a different one?"
The whole room suddenly turns quiet when it is full of chatter a while ago and he feels pressured with all the attention he's getting.
"No, I like this one. It looks good on you," Jeongin says, wanting to end this exchange.
"I trust you," Linda says, walking back to the mirror to fix her hair.
Jeongin continues buttoning his shirt facing his closet to avoid everyone's eyes.
That little stunt Linda pulled in the dressing room seems to make Justine need to mark her territory. She brings him a drink and corners him on the sofa in the cabana.
"I like this shirt on you," she says, softening him with a compliment.
"Thanks," Jeongin sheepishly says, sensing that she's going to ask about him and Linda.
"How are you feeling tonight?" She asks, then sips her drink.
"I'm feeling good," he answers but that would imply that he talked about the thing that happened with Linda.
"I guess," he quickly adds, then gulps his wine.
He swallows it quickly, not wanting to give Justine a chance to talk about it, "You?"
Justine smiles and taps her glass of wine with her long nails, "I feel good. I feel like kissing someone tonight," she says with a sonorous laugh.
Oh, fuck.
Remember when he said it's only about time that he and Justine break a rule? Well, this is it.
She inches closer to him and puts her leg over his lap, "I know we both want to explore things here..."
She props her hand against the sofa and tilts her head to the side as she looks at him, letting a moment pass in silence to build tension.
"But if there's one person I want to break rules with..."
Justine drags her nails down his arm, sending a shudder down his spine then leans in to whisper, "It's with you,"
Deep down, he knows the bad in him wants to come out and play.
"What do you think?" Her voice drops lower than before.
All sorts of thoughts fill his head and most of them are going against him. It costs $6,000. Lana will be pissed. The group is going to kill him for it. What if he craves it more?
He keeps considering Justine's offer until he runs out of excuses to not kiss her and his thoughts favor his desire.
"I guess a kiss won't hurt," he mutters to her.
"Promise, it won't hurt," Justine says, before crashing her lips against him.
It's the second time they kiss but it feels different now that there are rules that forbid it which makes it oddly satisfying. There's just something about breaking the rules that makes him feel so damn alive.
Justine gets it and that's why she's smiling when she lets go of the kiss, leaving Jeongin's lips tainted with her lipstick which she hurriedly wipes with her hand.
"See? It doesn't hurt," she says.
-
JEONGIN: I know everyone is going to be mad about it but I-I don't regret it. Not for a bit, to be honest [laughs]
-
Jeongin and Justine know how to keep their poker face on the whole night.
Damon almost caught them earlier but thankfully, they manage to make him not suspect anything and so does everyone even until it's bedtime.
"Guys, we've been good these past few days," Mick says to everyone in the room.
"So we're allowed to kiss now?" Damon jokes.
"Man..." Mick sighs, patting his pillow before resting on it, "I'm saying that you guys should keep it that way,"
With the lack of answers, Jeongin can tell that not everyone agrees with the idea, especially him. He exchanges a knowing glance with Justine.
"Better not be any rule breaks tonight, got it?" Mick warns with a glare.
If there's anything Mick shouldn't say to a bunch of rulebreakers, that is exactly it. Tell them to not do it only makes them want to do it more.
That notion seems to be right with, again, no obvious answers but low, weak mutters just to get the conversation over with.
The bedroom turns dark not long after and Justine scoots closer to him until her head rests next to his.
"It's best that we don't tell them," she whispers.
Jeongin agrees. He sees no benefit of being honest to them other than potentially getting crucified by them so it's a hard pass for him.
"I think so too," he says to her.
Justine lowly chuckles, "We shouldn't say anything until the last minute," she suggests.
He nods at that, "No one says anything."
Justine takes his hand and has him link his pinky finger around her for a pinky promise.
"That's a promise," she says and to his surprise, kisses interlinked fingers.
Somehow that night, Jeongin falls asleep at ease.
-
JEONGIN: I feel guilty about last night. I know everyone is going to hate us but Justine and I decided to not say anything about our rule break.
-
In the morning, no one still suspected anything.
Maybe the only one that does is Mick, his hawk eyes are scanning everyone's faces even though he's barely awake yet.
"I have a boner for like... 80% of the day," Damon suddenly shares a fact no one even asks.
Bianca chuckles at that while untangling her braided dark hair.
"When you get a boner, your blood rushes to your dick and if it goes for too long, it takes away the blood from your brain," Damon explains.
Everyone doubts that's how it works but they're laughing at his unconfirmed theory, including Jeongin with Justine clinging to his arm and her head resting against it.
Jeongin's eyes somehow wander to bed opposite him, seeing Linda looking not pleased seeing him with Justine which makes him abruptly stop opening his mouth completely.
The day continues and he knows he's only counting down to the time until Lana finally calls everyone to the cabana.
When the call comes, he isn't ready and he believes, so is everyone.
"This is not good," Keith mutters as he adjusts the waistband of his swimming trunks.
"It's too early for this shit," Damon grumbles behind him.
Everyone is taking heavy steps to the cabana, knowing that good things never happened there and today is one of those, that Jeongin knows for sure.
"What do you think Lana wants?" Kurt asks.
Courtney throws all of her hair to the side, "I have a feeling she's not going to be nice to us today," she says.
Jeongin nervously gulps air because Courtney is right.
-
JEONGIN: This is not good [scratches head] I'm absolutely shitting myself.
-
To avoid suspicion, he chooses to sit separately from Justine and when the chime comes, he immediately puts his poker face on.
"Despite doubling the fines, I regret to inform you there have been further breaches," Lana announces right away.
It's always a bad sign when Lana skips the formality and goes straight to the rule-breaking announcement.
"Oh, my days!" Keith shortly responds.
Jeongin pretends to act surprised, parting his mouth open in perfect O shape then rubs his chin in wonder. His eyes wander to where Justine sits and he sees the opposite reaction on her, she looks slightly excited for it.
"Breaches?" Francoise points out that this means that there's more than one rule break.
"Y'all need a stricter regime," Mick says with an angry sigh.
However, that doesn't make Jeongin feel relieved, he's still fear of what's going down in a few minutes.
"Does anybody want to get anything off their chest?" Keith asks.
-
JEONGIN: It's definitely not the time I want to tell everyone that I fucked up.
-
Despite his calm expression, Jeongin's heart is racing inside his chest. Is it too much of him to ask everyone for a little bit of understanding that for there to be a connection, there has to be a little physical thing?
"Who broke the rule?" Mick asks again.
It's at the tip of his tongue, he wants to get them out as soon as possible but something keeps holding him back. He takes a deep breathe to muster up the courage to say—
"Bianca, what's with your face?" Courtney and her observant eyes.
Biance starts turning her head side to side, propping a hand under her chin then looks at Damon.
"I have to be honest," she says.
"Oh!" Mick shouts in disappointment, holding his head in distress.
"It was last night. It was romantic. It just happened... we kissed," Bianca admits, then turns to Damon, asking him to add something to it.
"I think that was one of the most valuable rule breaks," Damon says.
Surprisingly, everyone takes that well. There's no shouting, no silently cursing and there's not even a glare aimed toward them.
"I think that you guys are building a connection. I think you guys deserve it," Francoise says.
"Your kiss costs the group $6,000," Lana informs.
-
JEONGIN: Wait... what is going on? This is not the reaction that I thought they were going to get.
-
Jeongin doesn't expect that to happen so maybe if he admits his rule break like Bianca and Damon did, everyone is going to take it well too, right?
Right???
"So who else broke the rule?" Mick asks again.
This is the time, if he waits until Mick asks again, that'll only earn him the opposite reaction from what he wants.
"Justine and I kissed last night," he says in one breath.
And guess what? Everyone is groaning at that. He looks at Justine to seek some help here through his eyes.
"It just happens, you know," Justine says, not really a strong defense.
"How much money have we lost? Does anybody know?" Mick starts to lose his shit again.
Jeongin's hand flew to cover his eyes, not wanting to see this and also disappointed that everyone reacted differently to him when it was only his first rule break.
"A kiss is harmless," Justine casually says which only angers everyone more with her blatant ignorance of the rules.
"Oh, my God!" Mick shouts in disbelief.
"Why did we get a different reaction from them?" Justine asks the important question here.
"Because we know what Damon and Bianca got going on is solid," Mick explains.
Everyone seems to agree with his answer but Jeongin still can't accept the unfair treatment.
"Thanks, guys," Bianca thanked everyone with a smile.
"Jeongin and Justine, your rule break has cost the group a further $6,000," Lana informs again.
There comes the groans again but despite that, he's not going to waste his energy by holding a grudge over it.
"The prize fund now stands at $176,000."
In the end, everyone is as disappointed to hear how much money they have lost.
"Thanks, Lana," Courtney mutters.
Everyone is getting up from their seats thinking that Lana has done talking when she chimes again and everyone stops moving.
"I haven't finished."
-
JEONGIN: Oh, what now? [Groans] Seriously?
-
Everyone is getting nervous once again as they wait for what Lana is going to say and they believe it's yet another bad news.
"It's time to establish how committed to each other you really are by sending some of you on dates..." Lana announces.
"Who's going on a date?" Bianca asks with a blushed cheek, secretly wishing that it's her and Damon.
Jeongin can't say if he and Justine are categorized as a couple yet but he'd love to get on a date, the others start to think that maybe it's good news this time.
"...with new arrivals."
Everyone is exclaiming all at once and this time, Jeongin doesn't even have to pretend to be surprised, he is genuinely surprised to hear that there'll be new guests in the villa.
"Our new arrivals are already aware they're on Too Hot To Handle."
Jeongin notices that not everyone is pleased by this, Bianca and Francoise are not accepting it well from their lack of enthusiasm.
"I have given the new arrival a choice of dating one of the boys currently in couples," Lana further announces.
"It's a curveball y'all," Kurt excitedly says while rubbing his hands together.
Jeongin could feel Justine's eyes boring a hole in between his eyes at the newly shared announcement and the possibility that he could get chosen for this.
"She has selected..."
Despite Justine's reaction, is it wrong of Jeongin to want to be picked for the date? He suddenly feels like meeting new people since he plans to keep exploring his choices.
"Jeongin."
He manifests it so hard that it becomes true but he reminds himself to keep calm about it even though he feels excited to meet the new girl before anyone else.
-
JEONGIN: I mean... the timing is impeccable [Grins]
-
"The other new arrival also has been given a choice of dating one of the girls currently in couples," Lana continues.
It's the girls' turn to get excited and Jeongin has no problem if Justine gets picked, that way he wouldn't feel bad about going on a date with the new girl.
"He has selected..."
Justine taps Courtney's knee, hinting that it's probably her chance even though she won't be selected because she's not in a couple.
It's either her, Justine, or Bianca.
"Bianca."
"Thank fuck for that," Kurt lowly mutters, grateful that the new guy doesn't choose Francoise.
"This really is about testing the waters, huh?" Linda says, being the only one enjoying this.
Well, Jeongin feels a sense of relief that he's not as established as Damon and Bianca because, for them, it could be a test to see how genuine their connection is.
"Jeongin and Bianca, please go and get ready for your dates," Lana orders.
Jeongin lets Bianca lead the way to the villa and goes straight to the dressing room to get ready.
Bianca plops down on her usual spot on the vanity table and reclines on her chair, "This is crazy..." she sighs.
He goes to his closet to pick something to wear, this is a date so he's definitely putting an extra effort to build his outfit.
"I'm having a date and it's not with Damon," Bianca sighs again.
Jeongin starts by picking a shirt from the ones he brought, pondering whether he's going for a plain shirt or with prints.
Bianca turns her head to look at Jeongin, then asks, "Do you think your head will be turned?"
That stops him from whatever he's doing, he turns to look back at her and answers, "I don't think I'll be tempted..."
Then he settles on a decision to wear a plain white ribbed shirt and takes it out of the hanger, "Unless she's a gorgeous girl with beautiful eyes," he suddenly adds.
Bianca laughs because she thinks Jeongin is confident about staying loyal to Justine until she hears the rest of his sentence.
"Eyes are your weaknesses, huh?" She asks.
"Yes."
"Well, we'll see," Bianca says, starting to do her make-up as she speaks.
And Jeongin can't wait to find out what you look like.
-
LANA: I have given our new arrivals one free kiss to use on their dates. They think I'm just being generous, but in reality, I want to see how Jeongin and Bianca, who are both in relationships, react if offered a fine-free kiss.
-
The date takes place somewhere quite far from the villa.
Jeongin part ways with Bianca when they get to the beach as she goes in the opposite direction and he has to walk the rest of the distance by himself. The staff has prepared a picnic with its classic checkered picnic mat and a basket of what he can safely assume is filled with food.
Being the first one to get there, he sits down and leisurely waits for the new girl by looking at the view from this part of the island he has never been to.
Jeongin gets more nervous the longer he waits for the new girl to come. When you do finally come, he's getting even more nervous that he can hear his heart beating loudly in his ears.
You gracefully wave your hand at him to announce your arrival, looking an absolute lush in a white bikini and a see-through skirt that does nothing to cover your body but floats around your hips as the wind blows your way.
Jeongin gets up and prepares himself to welcome you, putting on a smile that is way too easy to conjure. You are only a few steps away but he already likes what he's seeing.
"Hello," you softly say, introducing your name as you exchange a quick cheek-to-cheek.
"Jeongin," he introduces himself back with a smile that matches the excitement bubbling inside him.
With the afternoon sun hits you right in the eyes, they appear wide and bright, and Jeongin believes those eyes are going to get him in danger.
-
JEONGIN: Lana brought out my dream girl to test me. Fuck!
-
"This place is amazing," you delightfully say as you stare out at the sea with the sun slowly sinking into the horizon.
Jeongin is busy filling the glasses with a cocktail mix and tries not to spill a drop. But he knows exactly what you're talking about, he's been living here for a few days and never gets tired of the view.
"Oh, it's paradise," he adds.
He hands one of the drinks to you and without anyone initiating it, you both clink your glasses together for a toast.
"Cheers!" You both mutter in unison.
It's when he has swallowed his drink, he finds your eyes on him again and since you already caught him staring, he may as well use the opportunity to admire your face. There's no denying that you're beautiful but the eyes... he can't stop staring into them.
"You have beautiful eyes," you say, as if you heard his thought and say it out loud for him.
He sheepishly smiles and brushes his hair to the back, "So do you. You're uh... really pretty," he shyly compliments back.
You tuck your hair behind your ear and smack your lips together before talking, "As soon as I flicked past your photo, I was like, yeah, that one," you share with a mix of shy and seductive smiles.
Jeongin's hand flies to his ear and he hopes that they're not turning red from these compliments. He looks away to calm himself down but continues talking, "Really? What is your type?"
"Like you," you answer without a beat.
When Jeongin looks at you again, your eyes automatically lock in a gaze, "I like pretty, bad boys like you."
This time, Jeongin is sure that his ears are reddening and his cheeks are also heating.
"What's your type?" You ask back, sipping your cocktail after.
"I don't have a type," he starts to find it hard to think, "Even if there is, it's always changing."
"Then how about now? What's your type?" You ask, playing with the mini umbrella in your drink and eyes that are doing things to his heart.
Are you really asking? Or do you want him to tell you that he has found his type just now?
"Beautiful eyes, uh... great smiles, good chat," he stutters his words, knowing that he has just described you. He then quickly sips his drink to help clear his throat.
You lightly chuckle then make this gesture with your index finger, drawing a ticking mark in the air as you say, "Tick, tick, tick."
-
JEONGIN: I'm really enjoying getting to know her even though she's so tempting.
-
The way you sit on your side with a hand propped against the mat, Jeongin can see every curve of your body, the ascents and descents, and gosh, he likes what he sees.
"You've got a great body," he blurts out and at this point, he just can't control his brain from saying things without filtering it first.
Surprisingly, you take it well and with a smile, "Thanks."
You sit straighter to show him your form and put all of your hair to the back, "I worked hard on it."
"Yeah?" Jeongin asks in wonder.
But you seem to take it as a doubtful response from him and you get up, kneeling on the mat to remove the thin skirt wrapped around your hips.
"It's all natural," you confirm, running your hands down the side of your body.
If he were in some cartoons, Jeongin's eyes would be popped out of their sockets at the sight of your body. It evokes something in him that makes his throat suddenly dry.
You sit back down on the mat and pick up your drink, "Let's make it fair," you say.
Jeongin gulps air to be able to speak, "huh?"
"I'd like to see you with your shirt off," you say, a naughty smile dancing on your pretty face.
He has no problems showing you his body, he worked hard on it too but he doesn't want to spoil it to you right away.
"You'll see it off," he teases, surprised that he's still got game in him despite his brain barely functioning.
"Okay," you simply say, then bring your glass close to your lips but not drinking it.
Just so you know, Jeongin also has a thirst for something else.
-
JEONGIN: She has all of my attention. I'm just not thinking about anything else.
-
Jeongin takes the food out of the picnic basket and lays it out on the side of the mat, a bowl of sliced fruits while the other bowl is filled with melted chocolate.
"Why are you sitting so far away from me?" You ask, pointing out the big space between the two of you.
Even in this distance, he can feel the heat and the tension between the two of you. He doesn't want to know what would it feel like to be in such proximity with you.
"Come closer! I don’t bite," you cutely whine, putting a cushion to where you want him to be.
"Okay, maybe, just a little?" You add a joke and a giggle.
Jeongin relents, he scoots closer to you yet maintains a safe space in between. He watches as you open the bowl of sliced fruits and take out a piece, dipping it in the chocolate before feeding it to him.
He hurriedly leans closer and opens his mouth for you, he manages to eat it alright but the chocolate drips onto the corner of his mouth.
"You like to get messy, do you?" He jokingly says, cluelessly wiping around the mouth.
"Yes, I do," you confidently answer.
You're quick to offer your help to clean it for him, wipe it with your thumb, and not hesitate to lick it clean after.
He then takes his turn to pick up a slice of fruit and dips it into the chocolate, he carefully brings it close to your mouth. You hold his wrist to keep his hand steady as you take it into your mouth and keep holding his hand to clean the chocolate coating his finger.
It does something to him seeing you taking his finger into your mouth and also feels how hot and wet the inside of your mouth is.
"Mmh... yum," you delightfully hum as you pull his finger out of you.
-
JEONGIN: The longer this date goes on, the more I can't resist her.
-
There's so much sexual chemistry here and it's getting heavy that Jeongin doesn't know how long he can go on, you are literally too hot to handle.
Your hand reaches for his face, using only your fingertips to trail his jawline, and then rest your hand on his thigh. The two of you are staring into each other’s eyes but he can tell that your minds are thinking the same things.
"Kiss me," you say out of the blue.
As if making his head feel like a scrambled egg isn't enough for you. He can't remember if Lana has briefed you on what kind of show you're in and that you ask him to do something he's not allowed to do.
"You do know it's Too Hot To Handle, right?" He asks with his brows furrowed, feeling bad if the answer is no but he's more afraid to know the answer is yes.
"I do know," you tell him, your hand inching closer to the hem of his swimming trunk.
The tension is getting unbearable and Jeongin feels like it's weighing down his chest, making it hard for him to breathe.
"Lana told me that I get a free kiss without getting fined," you explain, tipping your head to the side while your fingers are lightly caressing his inner thigh.
His brain is close to short-circuit yet he tries so hard to think straight and what would happen if he does certain things with you.
"I do want to," he says.
A smile rises on your face and your eyes light up the second you hear his answer.
Jeongin doesn't want to see those glints in your eyes disappear when he tells you about Justine but he doesn't want to hide it from you either.
"It's just like... there's a girl inside there," he says, not giving you the detailed information.
That doesn't seem to stop you as your eyes remain wide and bright as you tip your head to the other side and hold his gaze, "Is she special to you?"
Special? Jeongin isn't sure about that so he settles on a safe answer, "It's only been a few days so I can't really tell."
You smack your lips together again, tantalizing him with how plump and soft they look to him.
"I don't see the damage in it. If anything, we'll know if there's sparks between us," you give such a strong argument to him.
It takes every bone in his body not to try and kiss you right this very second. He may have said Justine is not that special but kissing another girl behind her back... that's not how he wants it to go.
"Come on," you tease, leaning closer to his face.
His heart leaps when you place a soft kiss on his cheek and rub the lipstick mark after.
"I know you want it," you lowly mutter, teasing him more with your sultry voice.
He doesn't know if you notice but his body is slightly shaking from constantly resisting the urge to fill his desire to kiss you and his hands are gripping the picnic mat to not get them anywhere close to you.
"I do want to kiss you," he breathlessly says as if it takes all of him to admit that.
You smile in satisfaction, leaning in to land another soft kiss on his jaw to give him a taste of your lips. Your lips linger close to his ear to sweetly whisper, "Come on, Jeongin."
-
JEONGIN: I am so tempted. I don't know what to do [Exhales]
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weenwrites · 2 months
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What if some of the TFP Decepticons (let’s say Soundwave, Starscream, Dreadwing) were keeping a secret romance with a human behind Megatron’s back? What will happen when Megatron inevitably finds out about it? (HCs please)
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Secret Relationships
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Summary - Secret relationships with giant robots stuck in a war can remain secret for only oh so long... Characters - Soundwave, Starscream, Dreadwing Content - Fluff, Angst Category - Headcanons Trigger Warnings - Character Death
✎ A/N: Thank you for the request! I had a lot of fun writing these!
[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]
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Soundwave
No one knows how exactly Soundwave ever fell in love with a human, let alone the reason why he kept it a secret, but if he was willing to go this far for you, then it means that you are—without a doubt—special to him (but what he sees in you is what makes everyone else aboard the Nemesis curious, once the secret's out of course).
The moment before the two of you began officially dating, they made it clear that you must keep the relationship a secret, and as such, this may not be the best or happiest relationship. Meetings must be secret and planned in advance, and he's more often than not kept aboard the Nemesis for work, meaning that it's a rare treat to even see him.
But they try their best to be a good partner. He frequently sends you gifts, and most of the time spent together is over texts, so it's kind of like a long-distance relationship. But whenever the two of you have a moment you can spend together in person, he enjoys going sightseeing. But he has to be careful about how frequently he uses groundbridges, because every destination is most likely recorded and kept on a datalog that he can't easily erase without arousing some suspicion.
The two of you have most likely spoken about the war before, and whether you decided to pop a question about leaving the decepticons is up to you. But he comes to learn that being around you makes them realize just how exhausting the war is. It never used to feel this draining. It never used to take such a massive toll on him. It never used to feel so... Hopeless. It's depressing, honestly, which makes him look forward to the little moments of peace he experiences whenever he sees you.
But those moments didn't last as long as he would've liked. They didn't know who may have done it, or how it happened, but when Megatron requested to meet with them, they never expected to learn that he would find out about you. Megatron forced them to explain themselves and to tell him all about you. But luckily he had prepared for this eventuality in advance, despite how depressing it is.
The two of you had talked about what would happen in the event that your relationship was discovered, and you both came up with 2 plans.
1. Fake your death. Say that Megatron found out about you, but he doesn't know your real name, where you lived, or any important information about you in general. Soundwave would risk giving him false information and leading him to kill someone else instead. Unfortunately in this eventuality, it will mean that the two of you can never see one another again, unless you both want to risk your lives again.
2. Bring you to the Autobots and entrust them to protect you. Let's say that in this eventuality, Megatron knows who you are, where you live, etc.. And depending on whether he's taken the initiative and taken you aboard the Nemesis, or still plans on taking you aboard, this plan has varying degrees of success. Ideally, Soundwave would contact the Autobots, requesting to meet, and he would bring you to the rendezvous coordinates and pass you off to them. It would be hard to make this appear as if the Autobots randomly showed up and stole you away, so once again, the chances are that you'll most likely never see eachother again, but in this case he's at a significantly bigger risk of dying.
But after some deep, deep thinking, he came up with a third. Leave the Decepticons. He loves you more than he can ever express, he loves you enough to even consider this option, but that doesn't make it any easier. He's dedicated a good portion of his life to the Decepticon cause, he's witnessed the rise of the cause, the loss that it brought, and the fall of Cybertron, but he still remained loyal to Megatron. But it all changed when he met you. He doesn't understand how or why he ever let you get as close as you did, but he wouldn't even dare to change a thing. It's just a shame that he can't chose this option now.
After he knows that lazerbeak has brought you to the autobots safely—after he finds a clawed hand digging into his plating and pinning him down, the pressure increasing ever so slightly and threatening to crush his throat—after shards of his visor fall to the floor, and there, he comes face to face with Megatron who glares down at him with nothing but disgust and malice—even now, he could look back on all that he's gone through with you to where he's found himself now, and his only regret is that he didn't have enough time for you. No matter the outcome, they're prepared to face whatever comes for them.
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Starscream
How the two of you met and let alone even became a couple is a story that not a single soul will ever know, but honestly given the situation the two of you are in, you'd both most likely think it's for the best.
Out of everyone else on the Nemesis, he knows well what will happen in the event that Megatron finds out about you, and he knows that the fallout of it all won't bode well for either of you. He's had nightmares about what would happen, and the worst one was where he was forced to kill you or else Megatron was going to do worse. He's rarely had that dream, but every time it's never failed to leave him worse than a shaking mess.
He understands that this isn't the easiest relationship to be in, and he feels guilty that all he can offer you are sparse gifts and comforting words through text rather than in person. So he tries his hardest to make what little time he does spend with you, the best days of your life.
It's hard to get resources to set up little picnics, or to even get you a wrapped gift, and it's even harder to hide it from the other decepticons, but he tries anyway for your sake despite the high risk it poses to you both. And some cons begin to notice that he seems rather eager to go outside for a flight, much more than he used to, so some begin to suspect that he may be up to something.
At times you even go weeks without hearing anything from him because it's too risky to send you even a single text. But every time this happens, he tries his best to make it up to you when he gets back to you. Yet no matter how many times you assure him that you forgive him with the most sincere look you can muster, that does nothing to silence the part of him that thinks: it won't be long until he'll hear you say those words for the last time.
He's grateful for your forgiveness each and every time, yet all good things will come to pass no matter how much he'd try to stop it. He just hopes that this ends with no blood or energon spilt, and that you'd walk away without so much as a measly scratch, but since when was Starscream ever that lucky?
One day, someone found out about you. He doesn't know who or how, but he'd personally hunt them down and damn them to the pits of Kaon if he was given even so much as just their name, but much to his misfortune, he's denied that possibility as he's forced to flee from the Nemesis and reach you before the other decepticons do.
Knowing you better than anyone, he's able to accurately guess where you might be that day, and with little time to spare he scoops you up and blasts off as he tries to communicate the gist of the situation in as little words as possible as he tries to avoid fleets of vehicons that have been sent after the two of you.
He can't keep running away forever, primarily because of your sake. You have a life of your own to live, and he'd rather throw himself into an active war zone than ruin your life. He hates having to do this, but if has to contract the autobots in order to keep you safe, then so be it. He sends a message under the guise that he's taken you hostage and demands for them to meet him at a set of specific coordinates, and if everything goes according to his half-baked plan, then you'll be safe.
But what about him, you ask? Starscream is visibly hesitant to answer, and even when he responds he doesn't truly answer your question. He simply assures you that the autobots will keep you safe because his first and foremost priority here is your own safety and welbeing. You may not see or hear from him for a while, but he'll be fine! He'll figure something out, you can count on his word for it.
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Dreadwing
He hardly leaves the Nemesis unless he's dispatched for a mission, so it's very difficult for him to find any time to spend around you in person. Sure, he has free range of the Nemesis and he can leave and fly as he pleases, but the more he does this, the more suspicious it will look, so unfortunately for your sake and his, he has to keep your meetings in person few and far between.
But he makes it up to you in an abundance of text messages. Each message he sends you is long, eloquent, and teeming with his admiration for you, it's like a love letter of sorts, and each is more charming and sweet than the last. And despite how he may seem, he can be quite the conversationalist given the right topic, and he keeps rather entertaining conversations going between the two of you, and they more often than not last very late into the night.
He can be quite the romantic gentleman, and at times his words are so poetic (and maybe a little cheesy) that it might lead you to think that he seeks his inspiration from a beautiful blend of old, romantic cybertronian works and human love stories (or maybe it's from those cheesy romance movies that play in the drive-in theaters).
His favorite memory of the two of you together was when he took you out to stargaze. You were both talking about your ideal futures, and you had started, making sure to emphasize that you wanted him to be part of it for sure one day, no matter what happens. The moment was sweet, and despite however unlikely it was that the two of you would ever be able to spend your days together without any fear, he promised that one day he would be able to devote himself to you in the way he wishes he could, that he would be with you for eternity.
But eternity is never truly eternal. In an ever changing and evolving world where even the deepest secrets eventually come to light, that dream shriveled up and died the moment he had been summoned before Megatron to speak about his little "human pet" he's kept on the sidelines for so long now.
Though his lord's disdain and immeasurable disappointment was meant to shame him into correcting his ways and "disposing" of distractions like you as Megatron suggested if he were to regain his honor, he found himself far more concerned with your own safety. You're far more vulnerable than he is, and though the price he must pay for your safety is tantamount to sacrificing his own life, then so be it. He chose you, and now he is willing to pay any price and bear any burden that comes with it.
Though he has to break the sound barrier in order to do it, he manages to reach you in time and deliver you to safety. He quickly explains that he's informed the autobots of your situation and that you will be safe under their careful watch while he goes to face Megatron alone. But unfortunately no matter how many times you persuade him to come with you, even if Optimus was there to agree with you and help advocate your point, Dreadwing can't bring himself to do it.
Betraying the decepticon cause may be one thing, but to forget it all and run away with you is something he doesn't believe he can act upon--he promises that it's not that he doesn't love you, it's that he has a very complicated relationship with the cause now, and this is his way of properly dealing with it. Honor is a very important thing to him, you know this as well as he does, and this is something he must confront head-on, even if the chances of his survival are slim. No conniving plans, no tricks, no deceit, it is just him and Megatron.
And eventually, as he finds himself fading in and out of consciousness, overwhelming shame floods him. Not only has he betrayed the Decepticons, but he's betrayed his promise of an eternity with you. Even as he sees a blade slowly rise above his head, poised to strike at any second, all he can really think of is how he wishes he could plead for your forgiveness and do whatever he could to earn your love and trust again.
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etoilesbienne · 11 months
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out of curiosity, what are the common qEtoiles mischaracterizations, and the accurate characterizations you wished people used more? Sincerely, an English speaking fan who is re-learning French!
honestly i kind of consider it a mischaracterization when people like... make etoiles into this team leader who always knows what to do and move things forward. or like that he has a bad attitude to like... match his fighting skills. or like the dark knight brooding warrior. he says he is these things. these are lies. he lies about himself constantly. i wouldnt trust a good 2/3 of the things he says about himself to be true. you read him clearer through his actions than his statements.
in my opinion etoiles is more like. sturdy second in command. he's not there to lead, he's there to fill in the holes where they pop up. he's there as cover. he's quick witted in shortchange scenarios, but that is so not the same thing as a genuine strategist. in another expression, if someone is a leader, the leader is a doctor, etoiles's role is more like... the EMS team in an ambulance. He's not there to fix your problem, he's there to keep your problem covered until you can get someone else to fully fix it. but that doesn't mean his role is any less important when he's needed.
Etoiles is also, like, so very much a team player if he respects and trusts a person. And it is so easy to have his respect and trust. His trust starts at 100% for everyone. he's also so very very very good at reading people (gesture to the bbh clip where bbh moves his mouse slightly downward and etoiles calls him out on being depressed). He read Mousey as enjoying dungeons and pvp way more and wanting to hang out with her. He's also one of the only people who like continuously runs in the girlies group and makes all of them pvp with him and they all love it so he keeps coming back to pvp with them. Thats how he started his whole thing with Tina and pvping with her constantly. Reading other people also, he loves finding other pvpers so he attacks roier constantly now bc he knows roier can pvp.
What else OH Etoiles loves whining (and this is because Rayou loves whining) that dude will just complain constantly. You haven't seen an etoiles stream if youve never seen him whine. Can't say I'm not kind of endeared by it. With this too he loves over explaining things (RIP armor powerpoint wish you couldve been given...) because he wants to help everyone....
OH and he's very over exaggerated too in replying to people in a complaining way and a self deprecating way and also likes to try to push the envelope with people and he does all of that to try and get a laugh out of others. like he's well aware people find him going "Oh so you don't give a shit about me and want me to die ? you want etoiles to die ?" fucking hilarious and also loves complaining in the first place thats why he does that. if your etoiles isn't complaining and whining then it isn't etoiles. the self deprecating thing is... its interesting bc he does have full faith in his abilities but will never say it out loud unless its trying to reassure someone who is worried. pushing the envelope is so specific he won't do it too much and its like........... from what ive seen (correct me if im wrong) heavily directed at non francophones where if they laugh at something wack he's done he'll try to do it again to make them laugh more. shoutout to the time he made bbh laugh so much when he cursed he didn't get languaged by bbh so he kept cursing to try to make bbh do it again. the dudes a total people pleaser.
smaller thing ive talked about extensively already (u can prob find it in my q!etoiles tag if i remember i'll edit a link to the posts in here soon lol) etoiles hates losing he looooooves winning he's very intense about it lol. its cute!
on a final note even if you don't become deeply unwell about etoiles like i am i think this highlight clip video has like everything he's like condensed into like 11 minutes. You should watch it. It's a good starting point.
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yandere-sins · 2 years
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alright, hit us with sum yandere!ghost please! can't wait to see what you'll do with him, i always pictured him as a scary possessive when it comes to the person he loves considering his shit past so i look forward to see what you'll do
I think you are on the right path, my friend! Would have put him into the possessive category as well :D I made some random HCs, thank you for requesting, enjoy!
»»———————— ♡ ————————««
♡ Ghost needs physical touch. It's not just a huge want or desire, it's how he assures himself that everything is okay and nothing is wrong. If he can't at least have the simplest form of touch by pushing his chest in your back as if he was docking onto you, he will get agitated and irritable, putting missions at risk as he loses the composure he's known for. He needs to have you close to keep his thoughts focused and his mind at ease. For Ghost, there's comfort in protecting you. Now that he finally has someone to protect, he goes to all the lengths to do so. If he has to leave you, he wants to have you near for as long as possible before he locks you away. It leads to a few interesting times where you are asked to stop being selfish and just appease him for the sake of putting him in a better mood. 
♡ The reason he needs to feel you so much is to reassure himself you're alive and well. He puts himself between you and the door at night to shield you in case there's an intruder, and he keeps you no farther than an arm's length from him for the very same reason. If you hate it, that's a problem, but maybe you can learn to live with it when you realize how tame he becomes if you allow him the pleasure. Let him show you how much he adores you, gently, calmly for once, since the moment you stop, he'll go back to being the hard, unyielding bastard you know. 
♡ Because he loves you in his lap or lying on top of him until you fall asleep. He loves pressing his fingers into your body as if you were a stress-relieve toy, though when you squirm, he'll use his nails to scrape at you as a warning, nipping away until you force yourself to calm down. Be good and face him if you want Ghost to spoil you with his attention. He's very willing to listen and give you what you ask for while you straddle his thighs, let him nuzzle his face against yours through the mask, and put on your sweetest voice to talk to him. He'll be pudding in your hands if you cup his face, even brush your fingertips under his mask, skimming them over his skin until you hear him practically purr, his chest rumbling against yours in delight. It's the only way you can convince him to comply with your every wish (unless they are unreasonable, like leaving you alone). You have to take your chances when you can and need him to hear you out and listen to what you need to tell him. After all, his time and attention are limited by his own need for you.
♡ He lets very few people near you, and only if he must, but sometimes, on big missions, it's necessary. You have to enjoy the small conversations you're allowed to have, even though he reminds you constantly that he's right there with you. His fingers ghosting over your wrists or the back of your neck, ready to grab you at all times, him taking off his gloves to comb through your hair or tugging your shirt back whenever you get a bit too excited in conversation and inch away from him. You'll probably never understand why no one tries to help you even though this isn't normal, but unfortunately, the people you are allowed to talk to have bonds with Ghost that are more important to them than whatever he's doing with you.
♡ However, if not for an emergency, if anyone reaches out towards you with questionable intentions, Ghost will snatch their hand, squeezing so hard they can feel their bones crumble in his grip while Simon reminds them to never fucking touch you. It doesn't matter who it is, friend or foe, he will go ballistic if they are after you. You are the one thing he sees red for, and no one wants to be on his bad side, not even you. Any outside interactions are ruined by such an outburst, but you wouldn't dare to argue with Simon about his behavior, knowing exactly how damaging his hands can be. You've been through it all in your rebellious stage and had the fractures to prove it. If he learns that you'd defend anyone else but yourself or Ghost, it won't end well for you and the person you're trying to help. It's better to appease him and stay on his good side, even for you. 
♡ He shares all his meals with you. You don't get your own plate. You get his plate. His fork, his spoon, but not his knife. Not because you would hurt yourself with it, no. He's just pretty sure that if you were to stab him, he'd be too excited to get his wounds treated and doesn't want an infection. So, instead, he cuts everything into mouth-sized portions for you. Kind, isn't he? The only good thing is that aside from force-feeding you if you refuse to eat at all, you can eat anything on his plate at the pace you want. He won't force you to have things you dislike (though usually, his meals are somewhat bland). Simon will, however, bump his shoulder into yours if you don't share with him, growing more and more demanding the longer you ignore him. He eats your leftovers, but he'd much rather have you feed him, moving his mask out of the way so you can put it in his mouth while he keeps your wrist steady because he knows you like to tease him (read as "stab him with the fork"). 
♡ Usually, Simon doesn't punish you. He puts you in your place and reminds you that running, hiding, or fooling him won't work. If you assure him you understand, he won't pursue any harmful punishments. He might force you to kiss him or get on his lap and be quiet now, but aside from his possessive grip on you, bad behavior won't have many repercussions. However, if you really need to be punished, hopefully, you are prepared to barely survive. He knows what is punishment and what is torture, but if you anger him too much, he won't see the fine line anymore, and he has the tools to break you if he must. Neither you nor he will be happy because of it, but it does make you think twice next time if you want to push him too far. At least he knows how to patch you up afterward, but it will still hurt so much, making you wish you were dead.
♡ You're no longer [your name]. You are an endearing, sickeningly sweet, and occasionally demeaning array of nicknames. You'll find Simon to be quite creative despite him also using the more socially accepted nicknames for you like Darling, Babe, Love, Hon, and Dear. Depending on his mood, he might also slide into teasingly inappropriate ones like Slut, Whore, Fun time person, and "Someone forgot their place again, hm?" If you displease him, he becomes less pleasant, every one of his names having the sharpness of a warning edged into them, a threatening rumble in his chest as he calls you out for misbehaving. Simon will, however, stare at you for a long time if you call him anything else but his name or Ghost. He just... stares, never responds. It tickles something in him, but he can't quite place it. Refrain from feeding into any complex he might have, though. Call him God (accidentally, jokingly, or fucked well) once, and you'll never hear the end of it for the rest of your life. He's your God, alright. Ghost will soak in that knowledge forever.
♡ His array of British and military nicknames has another surprise, mainly when he calls you some random weapon's name. When you ask him why he'd call you that, Simon explains how he shot someone straight in the head with the named gun. It reminded him of you. (Apparently, you have the same effect on him. You're killing him. Blow his mind. Looking at you is sending him to heaven. You get the drill, puns intended.) He'll never tire of calling you a bomb, and he even makes flirtatious jokes at times which are just too macabre to not chuckle awkwardly about them, especially when he tells them to you matter-of-factly. But hey, hearing you laugh positively makes his day and puts him in a great mood. He calls you out for collecting brownie points with him on purpose before he picks you up to get a reward for making you laugh, locking doors behind him so he can thoroughly enjoy you and create more lovely sounds from both your mouths.
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thesensteawitch · 1 month
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MESSAGE FROM YOUR HIGHER SELF 🍀💫
Pick A Pile Reading
(Left To Right- Pile 1, Pile 2, Pile 3)
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Hello, Senstea Souls! 🩷
I am back with another collective reading! Take a deep breath and pick a pile intuitively.
In case you wish to book a personal tarot reading with me feel free to DM me on Tumblr.
I am sharing the links to my rate card and booking form below:
🌷 Rate Card
🌷 Booking Form
Here is your reading:
Pile 1
Hello, my beautiful pile 1. Your cards came out in pairs. What I felt instantly was that your higher self is talking about two paths. So I thought maybe you've got two paths in front of you, and the one you choose will define who you become. But reading more into the cards, I realized that one path leads you to your future and the other to your past. So take how it resonates for you, pile 1. For the very first time, it seems you're seeing someone in a totally different light. You're surprised. How could you overlook this person's great qualities? Your higher self is asking you to heal the past by being loving toward yourself and toward someone else. Your past is not holding you back at all, you are. So to move forward, you must learn to handle your emotions. Perhaps that was your lesson that you needed to learn from the path of the past. It seems that you've done enough for the people around you. It's time you start doing things for yourself. You were so attached to being a good friend, son/daughter, father, mother, or partner that you forgot yourself in the process. Your higher self wants you to release the past with love and forgiveness.
Now moving toward the second path, which is toward your future, I see that some people are coming in the way. This is what your higher self wants to say to you: “My love, it's time that we start pursuing our dreams. It's time to search for our inner artist. Create something of your own. You may think what you want may be impossible, but I am asking you to believe in the impossible. This full moon shows your first artwork to the world. Don't dim your light. You have all the things you need to get started. With one strech of a hand, you can grab a star. Trust me, it just seems worlds apart, but truly it's not. Ask yourself: What are you afraid of? Where does your resistance come from? Someone has always been there for you, supports you, and is rooting for you. They too are transitioning with you. They are practically rowing the boat. And if you can't think of anyone, then know that the universe is rowing your boat. You've got your loved ones with you. SHOW THE WORLD THE REAL YOU. “The Hymn Of The Weekend” is your channeled song. The moment you launch your project, you will enter a new chapter of your life! Hunt down your fears and desires before the next full moon. And show everybody your talent.” If someone here wants to use a stage name, spirit is saying you're free to do so unless you're ready to reveal the artist behind the art.
Pile 2
Hello, my beautiful pile 2. Your higher self is sending you so much love right now. You needed that pain to have a perspective shift. The cards are so blue. I feel those who chose this pile have cried a lot in the recent past. What you went through wasn't easy at all, but you took a stand for yourself. Your higher self is really proud of you to take the lead in a challenging situation. Your higher self wants you to take a break now. There's something that's bothering you because it seems your beliefs have been challenged, so it's time you learn and understand something from a higher perspective. When something challenging happens, it's our ego that breaks first. And it's important for it to break so that you become truly humble. Listen to a Guru or a spiritual teacher. It's time you again become the student of life. Your higher self sees your kind, loving, and protective side. But the guides are saying that you cannot save people from the lessons they are meant to learn. You can't fight God. Recently, you've also communicated what's important to you or about your pain. From next week, each passing day will heal you if you try to upgrade your knowledge and be wise. It's not the time to think you know everything; it's time to learn. Learn why certain situations happen; what's the root cause? Be compassionate toward yourself and others.
This is what your higher self is saying to you: “My love, it's time to find your emotional balance again. It was just a bad day, not a bad life. You're overthinking, trust me. Your life is going to be far better than what you think it is going to look like. In fact, there's a new start coming into your life. Before that, you must learn what this challenging situation was trying to teach you. And you cannot learn it by yourself. You need to look for the deeper wisdom from books or spiritual gurus. What's true to you may not be true to others. So don't fight with yourself. The horror is in your heart, not in your life. Respect the differences. By the next new moon, if you continuously seek wisdom from the right and trusted source, you'll be out of this mental rut. Journey to your better mindset/mental state begins after 3 days.” ‘Just The Way You Are’ by Bruno Mars is the song I've channeled for you.
Pile 3
Hello, my beautiful pile 3. For how long have you been waiting for love? But what I see looking at your cards is that love has always been around you. You were blocked from it because you were not mentally ready for it. Your higher self is saying that love is selfless. It doesn't expect anything in return. There's someone in your life you misunderstood in the past (it can be anyone). Maybe you went through a tough cycle with them. For most of you, I think it was a romantic connection. Your higher self is asking you to show compassion toward yourself and work through your fears. Don't be so indicisive. There are no right or wrong decisions in life. Someone seriously has eyes only for you, pile 3. You're their dream come true. It seems that you worked really hard for this connection or on yourself, and your higher self is saying that your hard work is paying off, though you may not feel so. Your higher self is emphasizing these words: trust, choose, love, and be fearless. All along you were just running away from your patterns and your trauma that needed to be addressed.
This is what your higher self is saying to you: “You have the power to design your destiny! Do you get that? All along, you've painted your life with every stroke as per your wish! Ask yourself: What do you truly want? How can you work on your relationship with yourself and with others? If you really give it your all, you will have the kind of relationship you want. Yes, you did all you could, but there were some patterns being played from your end too in your connection. That did more damage than good. So be kind to yourself and to the other person. You're a warrior. You've come so far in your life. What you're afraid of is just in your head. You can easily defeat your shadows and rise above them. Every time given a chance, you got afraid and walked away thinking you'd done it all. But all these signs that you've been getting were leading you to this moment. You were where you were meant to be, and you're where you're supposed to be. So don't you ever think that you were on the wrong path? The obstacle in the path is the path. It just took you some time to understand the maze and find your way out of it. Open your heart and spread love. The song I am channeling for you is “Firework” by Katy Perry.”
If you're a writer, painter, or any sort of artist, you're being called to heal yourself through expression. Love and let yourself be loved, pile 3. You've built your life brick by brick, and your foundation is strong. Listen to your heart; what do you truly want? The truth is buried in the deepest corners of your heart, and the moment you'll show it in your art, you'll find it coming to the surface.
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libraryofgage · 9 months
Text
PJO Steddie Seven
One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six
PJO show is living rent free in my head everyone. I love that funky little fantasy show
Anyway, welcome to part 7, where we learn more about some of the kids' powers, get a peek into Steve's growing troubles with his powers, and Steddie get a fun little development too
As always, if you see any typos, no you didn't ;)
Oh! And a meme, another meme for you at the end lol
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While the kids have no problem adjusting to Camp Half-Blood and making friends (several of the other campers have asked El to freeze them if only because they think it's funny), Steve runs into a few bumps. He's not used to relaxing. He's not used to letting his guard down and having the children out of sight for so long. And he's definitely not used to his powers feeling beyond his control whenever Eddie is around, which is...well, always.
Don't get Steve wrong. He likes being around Eddie. In fact, he looks forward to it. Steve hasn't smiled or laughed this much or been around someone his own age in a while. It's new and kind of weird and just a little scary.
But it doesn't at all help with his growing nervous energy. He keeps waiting for a shoe to drop, quickly followed by another. It never does, and Steve fully realizes what a problem this is when Eddie is in his room one day and casually says, "Your clouds are different."
Steve blinks, looking over at Eddie in one of the chairs. He has a guitar in his lap, idly strumming as Steve's phone plays music for them. Steve had just been nodding off, feeling relaxed and sleepy when Eddie spoke. "What do you mean?" he asks.
"They changed again." Eddie says, frowning slightly as he points at the clouds drifting along the ceiling. They're a slate color now, not exactly brewing up a storm but looking ready to start pouring down on them. They aren't gloomy, though. It's more like...like the tension you feel when a natural disaster is about to strike and the clouds are the only warning you'll get of its arrival. "They were starting to turn white, but they're grey again."
"Oh," Steve says, flopping back on the bed with a sigh. "They're supposed to reflect my mood."
He hears the chair shift and steps coming closer to the bed before Eddie sprawls across the mattress next to him. "What's got you so grey, sweetheart?" he asks. Their hands aren't touching, but Steve can feel that now-familiar buzz at his fingertips, the little arches of lightning begging to reach out if he'd only let them.
Steve curls his fingers into a fist, refusing to succumb to the urge. He considers lying, just brushing off the question, but then he makes the mistake of looking at Eddie. He looks right into Eddie's brown eyes, and his resolve crumbles. His fist uncurls, their fingertips brush, and he allows a harmless spark to pass between them. "I'm just on edge," he says, looking back at the ceiling and watching the clouds. "Restless, I guess."
"You're used to fighting monsters and moving across the country, Stevie," Eddie says, sliding his hand closer to Steve's so their fingers are tangled together and a current begins to pass between them. "Being all...still is getting to you."
"Yeah, no shit," Steve says with a quiet snort. "Can't do anything about it."
"Well...there is Capture the Flag next week," Eddie points out, shifting closer, like their hands aren't enough. Now their arms and shoulders are pressed together, and Steve inexplicably feels some of that nervous energy disappear, like Eddie is taking it from him. "It can be an all-out bloodbath, you know."
Steve huffs softly, getting a wry smile. "I'm not sure anyone's gonna want to be on my team," he says. The other campers avoid him. Despite his best efforts, his attack on the patrol campers spread fast and mean, and everyone is a little wary. "So, unless I can be on a team by myself, it probably isn't gonna happen."
A few beats of silence pass, and Steve is about to assume he's somehow fucked up the conversation when Eddie says, "You wouldn't be alone. There's me. And the kids. And I could get the Hermes Cabin to partner with you. Plus, you know, you're a Zeus kid, Stevie. You ask to be in charge and nobody's gonna argue."
He...hadn't thought of that. Steve frowns slightly, letting the idea turn in his mind. It would be a challenge, of course, especially if all the other cabins decide to team up. But...a challenge means pushing himself, reaching limits he's never come close to, letting go completely and losing himself in the battle, whether he wins or not.
The clouds above them start to roll, broiling with the energy of a storm that's all thunder and lightning, and excitement surges through Steve. He doesn't even realize he's letting it get the better of him until Eddie yelps and jerks his hand away.
Steve blinks, jerking up and reaching out to Eddie but stopping halfway. "I'm sorry," he says, frowning slightly as he watches Eddie look at his hand. "I'm really sorry. Are you hurt?"
"No, no, it was more...," Eddie trails off, and then he gets an obnoxious grin and looks up at Steve. "It was more the shock of it."
A beat passes before Steve groans, grabs his pillow, and whacks Eddie in the face with it. Eddie dramatically falls back on the bed, lamenting Steve's cruelty and superior fighting skills as Steve laughs. When Eddie finally stops hamming it up, he pushes the pillow away and says, "So, I'd guess you're excited?"
Steve rolls his eyes, his cheeks hurting from smiling. "I...have an idea already, yeah," he says, looking at Eddie and leaning closer. "Wanna hear it?"
"Hell yeah," Eddie says, his eyes lighting up as Steve lays it all out.
And so begins a week of planning.
It's a week (most of which was spent convincing the Hermes Cabin to join his team and agree to just sit back and guard the flag) that leaves Steve buzzing with energy on the day of Capture the Flag. Eagerness makes his limbs tingle and his body beg to pace as he looks over the demigods in front of him. It's just the Hermes Cabin, Eddie, and the kids, meaning they're facing off against the rest of the camp.
He can't blame the Hermes kids for looking like they've already been defeated. The only reason they're still hanging around, Steve is sure, is because he and the kids promised to do all of their chores for two months if they lose.
Steve takes a deep breath, rolls his shoulders back, and consciously lets go of the Mist around him. He's used to holding it close, using it to cover himself and make him look, well, weaker, that he has to purposefully send it off. He knows the moment it's completely abandoned him; the demigods all stand straighter, only the kids and Eddie dare to meet his eyes, and the snakes poking through the hole in El's beanie start tasting the air with interest.
"You've put your faith in me," Steve says, his volume normal but his voice still booming in the otherwise silent clearing. "You probably think we're fucked, but you'd be wrong. So, listen up. I will be offense. Eddie, Will, and El will be extraction. And you, with the strength of numbers, will be defense. Guard this flag with your life, and we will win. If any of the enemy manages to slip past me, hold steady. You are the final line of defense. Your job is the most important, and I expect you to give it your all."
The hesitant expressions have become impassioned, if not a bit confused by the fact. Steve grins at them, feeling the air crackle between his teeth as his excitement grows. He exhales sparks, his fingers buzzing and his skin close to bursting.
Steve doesn't often pray to Zeus. He's never felt a need to, and several goddesses have made themselves better known to him. But now, as excited for the fight as he is, Steve thinks to Zeus, If you've never watched me before, then watch me now.
He puts on his Blue-Team helmet, the distant horn ringing in his ears as the lightning floods through him, and heads into battle.
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Eddie's role is simple: keep El and Will from getting hurt. He'd be offended at the simplicity if he weren't already plenty aware of his inability to fight well. He's built for defense and retreat, which is why he's got his shield at the ready and is preparing himself to jerk the kids back at the slightest hint of danger.
They're crouching behind some dense bushes, Will and El peeking through the gaps at some Red-Team campers, the first line of defense for the red flag. "So, what's the plan?" Eddie whispers, shifting slightly as he looks between the two kids. Thunder rumbles, and it takes every shred of Eddie's self-control to not look at the gathering storm clouds above them.
"Will makes them daydream," El whispers back, her beanie squirming as though the snakes can feel their imminent freedom. "If that does not work, I will turn them to stone."
Eddie slowly nods, glancing at Will as he cups his hands to his mouth and whispers unintelligible words into them. "And, uh, how is making them daydream supposed to help with distractions?" he asks.
"They are very strong daydreams," El replies.
Will finishes whispering, and a purple dust-like swirling mist is nestled in his palms. He nods to El, waiting for her to carefully make a larger opening in the leaves before gently blowing the mist from his hands. Eddie watches as it twists and curls around the Red-Team campers, slipping under their sleeves and floating to their ears and eyes. The mist settles there, a thin and nearly imperceptible film that Eddie wouldn't know to see if he hadn't watched Will make it.
A few seconds pass as the campers slowly relax, their grips on their weapons loosening until a few swords fall to the ground. El waits a few more seconds before picking up a sizeable pebble and throwing it at a tree across from them. Despite making a loud thud when it hits and falls to the ground, none of the campers blink or move an inch. The only movement Eddie can see is a slight sway and the occasional twitch of fingers, like their body is trying to follow through on movements they make in their daydreams.
"Metal," Eddie whispers, keeping pace with El and Will as they move out from behind the bush. If everything is this easy, they'll get back in time to see Steve fighting. Eddie would love if he could see Steve fighting again. "How did you do that?"
Will flushes slightly, rubbing the back of his neck. "It's not a lot, really," he says, his voice quiet and a little embarrassed. "I mean, I just use dream-speak to give the daydreams specific emotions and then send it over."
"Dream-speak?"
"You know how you can't read in dreams? And if you try to remember exact conversations, you can only get snippets or a word or two? That's dream-speak," Will explains. He thinks for a few seconds before adding, "It's, um, supposed to feel intangible."
"How long does it last?"
"Usually," El says, her voice soft as she pauses and gestures for Eddie and Will to follow, "around twenty minutes. But it depends on the person." She leads them to large boulder, all of them ducking behind it in time for some Red-Team campers to walk by.
"Holy shit," one of them says, looking in the distance at the gathering storm clouds as she slows down. "Man, I am fucking glad we're not fighting that Zeus kid."
"No kidding," the other mumbles. "He's a monster."
Eddie has heard plenty of people call Steve a monster in the past week. Most of them say it with awe in their voices, unable to find any other word to describe the sheer power they saw from Steve. But others, like the one here, say it like Steve is a monster for them to defeat for the glory of it.
He clenches his jaw, grip on his shield straps tightening some. Before he can do anything, El reaches up to her beanie, and Will slaps a hand over Eddie's eyes. He hears the hiss of a writhing mass of snakes, aborted shouts, and then nothing. When Will takes his hand away, the two campers are statues, shock and terror contorting their expressions. El, with her beanie back in place, considers them for a moment before turning. "We should keep moving."
Eddie doesn't argue, but he does hold up a fist to El, grinning when she slowly bumps it with her own. She then turns to Will, her expression expectant, and she flashes her own tiny smile that matches Will's when their fists gently bump together.
Of every game Eddie has participated in, this game of Capture the Flag is by far his most relaxed. Will and El seem to have plenty of experience sneaking around and launching sneak-attacks. The closest Eddie gets to seeing any kind of action is when a Red-Team camper happens to stumble across them on their way back from the bathroom. Even then, before Eddie can raise his shield to block their sword, El slides in front of him and rips off her beanie.
"Thanks," he says, keeping his gaze away until the beanie is back on.
"You are welcome," El replies, staying quiet for a few seconds before adding, "Steve would be sad if you got hurt."
With that statement dropped on him, she continues leading the way to the Red-Team base. By the time they reach it, several Red-Team campers have been deployed to support the other campers fighting Steve. Between those, the ones stationed on the other side of the forest, and the campers they've disposed of, only twenty remain to guard the flag.
"I'm surprised the Athena kids aren't more prepared for you," Eddie whispers, glancing at El. She's the kind of secret weapon everyone knows about and prepares for, but he hasn't seen any of that so far.
El glances at Eddie, considering her response for a few moments before looking at Will. When he nods, she says, "I have not told Steve, but the Head Camper for Athena approached me two days ago. She offered me a personally-designed weapon if I did not use my powers during the game."
"El agreed," Will says, picking up the explanation with ease, "and promised not to use her powers to steal the flag."
"I am not stealing the flag," El finishes, a proud smile tugging at her lips, "I am capturing it."
"You're a little devil, you know that?" Eddie asks, grinning brightly.
"No. I am a little gorgon."
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They leave a garden of statues in their wake, and El takes a few moments to sigh and say it's not as good as her mother's before they leave with the Red-Team flag carefully hidden under Will's shirt. As they approach the border between the team territories, the sounds of battle grow. Swords clash, fighters shout, and lightning cracks between them all.
"We can take the long way," Eddie offers, his tone reluctant as he glances in the direction of the fight. They're close enough that a few trees are singed on the edges from lightning strikes, and Eddie holds his shield tighter. Letting the kids get anywhere near that fight isn't protecting them, and he should direct them in a wide circle around it.
But something is calling him, urging him closer to the fight in a way he's never felt before. He's not an Ares kid---Eddie has no desire to enter a blood bath---but he gets the feeling that Steve is going to need him soon.
"El and I can make it by ourselves," Will offers. "It's only a few feet away, and the game ends once we cross, right?"
Eddie nods, frowning before taking a deep breath. "No, it's okay," he says, waving for the kids to keep moving. "We'll try to head straight through and end the game sooner."
It's a choice he was expecting to regret, but doesn't get the chance. Nobody notices them, even when they get close enough to see a swarm of Red-Team campers surrounding Steve. None of them glance in their direction, too distracted by the fight to spare any attention to three insignificant campers sneaking by. Thunder rumbles endlessly above them, a deafening soundtrack that's only broken by cracks of lightning striking the ground and knocking campers back a few feet.
"Steve is having fun," El observes, sounding happy for him as they approach the Blue-Team border.
"He's never really let go, huh?" Eddie asks, getting a quick peek at Steve through the swarm. He lost his helmet at some point, leaving his feral expression and static-raised hair in full view, and arches of lightning jump across his body, occasionally reaching out to strike any Red-Team campers that get too close.
"No," Will says, his voice soft as they approach the border. The moment Will steps over, the horn sounds in the distance, and Eddie waits for the fighting to stop.
But it doesn't. Nobody in the swarm seems to realize the game is over. They continue to attack Steve, and Steve continues to fight against them, the air churning and sparking and ready to burst. A few seconds pass before Eddie realizes they won't stop until only one side is left standing. He gets it. Kind of. Steve carries the air of royalty; a challenge. If you can beat the son of Zeus, a literal Prince of Olympus, the glory of that achievement is untold. And it seems his fellow campers have fallen prey to that glory, utterly lost to it
Eddie feels that urge to join Steve surge through him again. He swallows around a sudden lump of nerves in his throat, searching for any other peek at Steve he can get as he says, "You guys go ahead. I'll help Steve. We'll catch up."
He doesn't bother waiting for El or Will to answer. He just rushes into the battle, something he never expected himself to do. Somehow, he doesn't meet any resistance. Lightning strikes the ground around him, pushing Red-Team campers back and urging him on, and Eddie wonders if Steve knows he's coming.
When he finally reaches the center of the battle, he sees Steve swing his bat against someone's side, the nails dragging painfully before he kicks the person back. Steve has lost his chest plate as well, and the only armor he has left are the wrist guards. There are slashes in his clothes and the edges are burnt. Eddie is almost distracted by the sight until he sees a daughter of Ares rush Steve from behind, her sword raised to bring down on his back.
In a move of unprecedented grace (seriously, Eddie will look back on that moment and never understand how he managed to not trip over himself), Eddie springs into the battle. He rushes at Steve, sliding behind him, twisting, and raising his shield in one smooth movement. The sword comes down on his shield, sending vibrations down his arm but otherwise causing no harm to him or Steve. Eddie pushes back as hard as he can, sending the daughter of Ares sprawling before pressing his back to Steve's.
"Thanks," Steve says, his words crackling and sparking against Eddie's ear. He thinks it's just a phantom sensation at first, but Eddie soon realizes lightning is literally arching between them, jumping across their shoulders and through their hair and buzzing down Eddie's chest.
He licks his lips, electric ozone lingering on his tongue, and Eddie is fascinated by the taste. "No problem," he says, his body following Steve without thinking. It's easy when he can feel the bolts of lightning between them start to shift, telling him which way Steve is going so he can keep up. "You know the game is over, right?"
"This is the most fun I've had in years," Steve replies, his tone implying that should explain everything.
And, yeah, it kind of does. He sounds genuinely happy and thrilled, his voice teeming with eagerness that's punctuated by the sound of his bat hitting a Red-Team camper in the head hard enough to make their helmet ring.
Eddie knows Steve would stop if he asked. Eddie knows he could talk Steve down from this lightning-fueled battle high. Eddie decides that wouldn't be nearly as fun.
"Okay," he says, pressing closer to Steve's back and blocking an arrow headed straight for Steve's shoulder. "Have fun, sweetheart."
Eddie didn't know it was possible, but Steve's power surges again, like it was just simmering under his skin, waiting for permission. And Eddie gave it. Bolts strike from the clouds above while arches jump across Steve and Eddie, running down their arms and leaping at Red-Team campers who get too close. They don't stop; the lightning continues to jump from camper to camper, electrocuting whoever it touches, and Eddie realizes he should have been electrocuted, too.
He blocks another sword, lightning crackling along the edges of his shield and shooting off sparks when its hit, and looks at the white-blue arches running along his arm. Without thinking, Eddie touches one, a gentle buzzing spreading through his hand as the arch transfers and jumps around his palm. It tickles more than anything else, and Eddie would think it's harmless if a Red-Team spear didn't get close enough for the lightning to jump and shock the camper unconscious.
It's not that the lightning jumping between him and Steve is harmless, Eddie realizes, it's just that it won't hurt him. He feels like some of the lightning has settled in his chest, crackling and warm and soothing. Eddie glances over his shoulder, taking in Steve's breathless smile and the way light splashes across his face with each bolt that hits the ground and the sparks that jump from his bat.
That feeling he got when he first saw Steve, the breathlessness and awestruck realization that the whole prophecy was just him, hits Eddie all over again. He lingers in it for a few seconds, letting it wash over him and settle in his limbs, before getting yanked out by a particularly close lightning bolt that makes his ears ring.
Right. A fight. That he's part of.
Eddie forces himself to focus on defending Steve's back. He blocks arrows and swords and shields and, once, a battle axe that makes his shield groan. That one pisses him off some. This shield was a gift from Hermes, a gift that showed surprising knowledge of Eddie's interests, and he'll be damned if it breaks. As though fueled by his anger, the lightning on his shield crackles and shoots down the battle axe, converging on the camper until she drops the axe with a yelp.
He doesn't get to linger on that too long; another arrow comes straight at Steve again, and Eddie is far more occupied by blocking it. And so it continues. Steve fights, lightning strikes, and Eddie defends him the entire time, giving Steve the space and security to just let go and release all the energy that had been building since he arrived at camp.
It's over sooner than he expects. One moment, Eddie's arm is buzzing from a particularly strong hit to his shield, and the next, the field is silent. Thunder still rumbles above them, lightning still crackles around them, and Eddie's heartbeat is pounding in his ears. Campers are scattered around them, all breathing but most knocked out for a while. Eddie takes a deep breath, feeling the air spark harmlessly in his lungs, and slowly lets it out.
He rolls his shoulder and retracts his shield, placing it around his neck again before turning around. "You good?" he asks, looking Steve over for any obvious injuries. His clothes are even more singed, the hem of his shirt blackened, and his hair is sticking up wildly but still somehow perfect. Steve's tense, his muscles strained as he pants, looking around them before his gaze finally lands on Eddie. He's still gripping his bat tightly, his knuckles white, and Eddie is about to gently pull it away when Steve just drops it.
Eddie blinks, frowning slightly as he starts to ask Steve if he's okay. And then he can't speak at all, because Steve's hands are cupping his cheeks and Steve's chest is pressed against his own, and Steve's lips are thoroughly occupying his. Lightning shoots through Eddie, jumping down his throat as Steve's tongue licks past his lips.
It doesn't hurt, though. Nothing from Steve could actually hurt him; instead, it makes his fingers tingle and his lips buzz and his heart jackrabbit against his ribs. Eddie is filled with an inescapable energy, and there's only one way to expel it.
So, he kisses Steve back. Eddie wraps an arm around Steve's waist to tug him closer and pushes a hand into Steve's hair, finally feeling the soft strands tangling between his fingers. He tilts his head and lets Steve have the quiet groan that slips from him when tiny bolts jump from Steve's molars to Eddie's tongue.
Eddie is breathless and floating and completely under Steve's spell and...and...and he's confused. Because Steve yanks himself away, a panicked noise in the back of his throat as he takes a step back. His chest is still heaving, but Eddie knows it's for a different reason now. Steve starts to say something, his lips swollen and red and begging Eddie to kiss him again, but no words come out.
And then he does something Eddie never expected Steve to do. He runs. He panics so badly that he runs back toward the Blue-Team base, leaving Eddie in the middle of the Red-Team carnage with a floaty brain and a stupid smile.
Maybe, if it had been anyone else, Eddie would be panicking, too. He'd be worried about the person actually liking him, worried about what the kiss meant, worried about any number of things, really. But it's Steve. Eddie knows Steve. He knows Steve's laugh and his walk and his lightning and now his kiss.
There are only two possible reasons for Steve running away: either he panicked because the kiss was too sudden, too heat-of-the-moment, or he panicked because of the literal lightning he sent through Eddie. Both are easily addressed, easy to soothe Steve down from freaking out about so they can get to kissing again.
Eddie's smile widens some, and he takes one last look at the campers around him before carefully making his way past them, figuring he should tell Chiron they'll be needing ambrosia and nectar.
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Tag List
@mugloversonly, @mentallyundone, @hairdryerducks-blog, @carriethesaint, @lunabyrd, @weekend-dreamer7, @farfaras, @littlelady03, @my-tears-are-becoming-a-sea20, @mogami13, @a-little-unsteddie, @itsall-taken, @queenie-ofthe-void, @tinyplanet95, @littlebluejane, @hangoversandhandgrenades, @rabbitwhoeatsstars, @bisexualdisastersworld, @steddieinthesun,
@paintgonewrong, @sadcanadianwinter, @deehellcat, @blanketlicker, @angrydonutdestiny, @booksareportal, @fallingchemicaldiscos, @am-i-obssed-probably, @anne-bennett-cosplayer
@estrellami-1, @fandomcartographer, @steddie-as-they-go, @cris-wants-a-word, @potato-of-the-lord, @plasticcrotches, @enigmahaze, @melodymeddler, @lololol-1234, @sageclipse, @steddiehyperfixation, @livelaughlexa, @genderless-spoon
For those who made it this far, a meme:
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210 notes · View notes
nogenderbee · 7 months
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♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ 𝕊𝕙𝕪 𝕘𝕒𝕞𝕖𝕣 ₊˚ˑ༄
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ hi there, blade, jing yuan, welt and dan heng with a teen reader thats like nene kusanagi? :)
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ Hey hey! And omg yes of course! I love the crossover I get from pjsk and hsr honestly ^^ So hopefully you'll like at least a bit what I wrote!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ platonic
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✧ Dan Heng honestly liked your shyness, you were like the only person on the Express who didn't chat that much so he found your presence quite relaxing
✧ but if you fine silences uncomfortable, he won't force moments when you two just sit next to each other silently and relax after long day
✧ bur silence is quickly broke by you playing your games and he realizes he was wrong... you're still not this bad but when your cheering gets louder within every day, it really makes him reconsider his thoughts
✧ it certainly takes him some time but believe me, he can get used and learn how to ignore your cheering, so he's back at finding your presence relaxing
✧ he doesn't mind your sharp tongue at all, in fact he's happy you can stand up for yourself- what do you mean it's only towards people you're comfortable with?!
"Eh... they want vanilla cupcake. What? And with sprinkles... Can't you really say it yourself? You were confident enough to insult someone's whole life in there shooting game of yours."
✧ that certainly surprises him but he realizes that when someone insults you irl, he'll have to be the one to step in...
✧ he doesn't mind your passions but be he's not necessarily interested in trying them out either... he just sort of accepts it like a hobby of any other
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
@miya-akane @toyaswif3y - come get your quiet but scary trabilazer!
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✧ Welt is definitely trying to be supportive and he doesn't mind your shyness a bit, he finds it adorable and it makes him somehow hopeful you won't cause troubles despite being a teen on express
✧ but once you get comfortable and he hears how emotional you can get during your games? He's on...
✧ you know how parents always say "it's because of your phone"? Yeah it's him... but he just applies that to your mood swings and sharp tongue, and nothing irrelevant like stomach pain!
"Watch tour language. I understand they made you mad but you stiill shouldn't say things like that. How about you take a break? Himeko just made tea."
✧ at some point, he probably tried giving you screen time limit but he can't be too strict... so unless you're troublemaker, you'll get past few additional hours
✧ he finds it curious how your personality switches depending on how comfortable you are, but he figures out why it happens pretty quickly
✧ he'll gladly take you with express on any exploration so you can slowly get more courageful, but if you'll prefer to stay in with PomPom and probably Dan Heng too, he's not gonna force you
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
@vodka-glrl - come get your father of the express!
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✧ Jing Yuan is pretty interested in your personality and passions if being honest
✧ he didn't mind your shyness and when you started being playfully salty? He saw it as a little gift of seeing your real self after hard work of gaining your trust
✧ he doesn't mind speaking for you, he'll even lens you his ear what you want to say and he'll repeat it
"You know I don't mind you hiding behind me. But I'll have to ask you to not pull my hair, please?"
✧ also, he never takes your remarks too personally, he appreciates the friendly critique and knows that you're just being playful teen
✧ he loves listening about your games, movies and so on! In fact, he even asked you if he could watch or play a bit
✧ he's not great at gaming but with you carrying him, you still rarely loose and both of you have fun because somehow, Jing Yuan finds weirdest buts and easter eggs while wandering around
✧ he knows someone in Xianzhou who may share your passion for games... so he uses that to get you some new friends and hopefully to open up to more people
✧ that's really the only thing he might push you forward to, if you have trouble making friends, he has no problem with helping you find the right people
﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌
@miya-akane - come get your soft general~
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✧ at first you were nothing like Silver Wolf to Blade, but after he saw how competitive and honest you can be... he finds so many similiar traits between you two
✧ you mean games made you so salty? What's going on with kids these days...
✧ but in the end, he couldn't care less as long as you worn annoy him
✧ and luckily for him, you're still rather shy so his intense gaze seems enough to make you go away and he'll use that fact
✧ but when you start getting more comfortable around him and Stallaron Hunters... he realizes it's not so easy anymore...
✧ you're not necessarily bothering him but he can hear your insults and remarks on his persona when you talk with Silver
✧ instead of 1 game fanatic who screams, yells and cheers after every victory or death, now he has to deal with 2... great.
"Keep it down you two. Don't forget where you are and what's our mission. Just because we're having a break doesn't mean you should give away our hideout. Because I can promise, I won't save you when enemies come."
✧ he really feels more on neutral end to you tho... you may talk behind his back and cheer and so... but you never tried forcing him into games he didn't like
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@vodka-glrl - come get your cold man!
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yanderes-galore · 2 months
Note
Hi would it be alright if I request yandere Leo (Rottmnt ) with a reader who got sucked into the show /movie and tries to help the gang deal with villains/kraangs please if that’s alright with you please 💗
also good luck with your request and make sure you take breaks ! 💗💗
short story or hcs please (can reader be female please if possible ) I’m fine with platonic or romantic 🥰
I haven't done much Isekai stuff but... let me spill my thoughts ^^; I'll try to do female for you.
Yandere! ROTTMNT! Leonardo with Isekai! Darling
Pairing: Platonic/Romantic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Female Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Possessive behavior, Manipulation, Clingy behavior, Stalking, Kidnapping, Delusional behavior, Forced companionship/relationship.
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The whole experience would be... disorienting for you.
Especially if you're isekai'd into the world as you are.
No training, no powers, you'd be so damn vulnerable.
You're in a world of mutants and crime with no real way to defend yourself.
I imagine by the time you get in the world, it's after the movie.
They're all older now, still playing hero to defeat enemy mutants and keeping order in the city.
At first you wander this fictional version of New York... confused.
You aren't quite sure where to go—?
You're not only trying to find out why you're here, but what to do to survive.
Somewhere during your journey you no doubt meet the turtles.
Or if not all of them, at least Leo.
Leo, now a little less cocky and bratty than his younger self, encounters you when rounding up some criminals.
At first he thinks you're someone who was being attacked by said criminals, just a young woman in New York whom he just saved.
So, with a charming yet playful smile, he comes over to you while leaning on his sword.
"Hey! You're welcome, by the way? I just saved your butt. Feel free to call me your hero~!"
Seeing one of your favorite characters up close... intimidates you a bit, actually.
Leo no doubt notices your stare, chuckling.
"Sheesh, lady... you act like you've never seen a Mutant before. Do you even know how often we've saved the city—? You from here?"
Leo then pauses, grinning more as he leans forward.
"Ohhh~ Or maybe you like what you see, huh?"
Leo just means to be playful, still having a bit of an ego even now.
This is your first encounter with Leo, who offered you help upon seeing how lost you looked.
Leo no doubt wants to help since you lack fighting skills.
Since, let's be honest, unless you took fighting classes in real life... you're defenseless here.
So, the good news is Leo is eager to help.
The bad news about having Leo be so close comes up later when he starts acting weird.
Leo would no doubt suggest you take a hotel room, although hesitates when he sees you have no money.
Your lack of personal belongings confuses him, he may even feel a bit bad.
Explaining your situation is a whole different story.
He struggles to believe you for a moment.
But... he and his brothers have their experience with other dimensions, aliens, mutants...
He most likely accepts your origin as it isn't too far-fetched.
"Wow... you really are lost. Seems like you need help... good thing I'm here, yeah?"
Leo doesn't focus on getting to know you until he knows you have somewhere to stay.
He can't let a mysterious woman like you just roam, right?
It most likely starts as a hotel room, then he allows you to meet his family later.
When he sees you situated, Leo then starts asking more about you.
You struggle but tell him how his world is a TV show in your world, that you've been invested in his journey.
He finds it odd at first... yet you inflate his ego when you say he was one of your favorites.
"Ohh, so you like me, huh? How sweet... even if it is a little bit odd."
What he says is ironic considering what he ends up doing later.
You start your time in this world relatively defenseless.
But as you get to know Leo, perhaps even meet his family, you learn to adapt.
You're taught self-defense with the others and even make friends.
In return for somewhere to stay, you promise to help them take on villains.
It's... fun when you get used to it.
Yet you know you want to get home soon... this isn't a dream... you really did come here somehow.
Leo, the first to know your past, forgets about this too.
He was actually quite... used to you.
Attached, even.
Throughout the months he felt you belonged here.
He loves to hang out with you... He likes impressing you.
The idea that he's your favorite makes him happy.
You're well protected by him and his brothers... even when you're taught to defend yourself he follows you everywhere...
Both in sight and out of sight.
He's only snapped out of his fantasies when Raphael or Donatello remind him that you do have a home, right?
You can't stay here forever....
Even April suggests they all find a way to get you home, after all, you must miss your own family....
The thought makes Leo clench his fists.
He... doesn't like the thought of you leaving.
When you leave... Will he forget about you...?
Will... Will they all forget about you?
Regardless of the type of feelings, Leo is devastated at the thought of losing you like this.
You miss your family...?
Aren't... Aren't they your family now?
Do you even want to leave?
In theory, if you could get to their world somehow, there's a way back.
The others are willing to help you out.
But, surprisingly to you, Leo keeps looking for ways to keep you all off track.
Even though he's older now, he still acts like an entitled brat at times.
He's willing to sabotage your attempts to go home if it means you stay with him.
There's countless times he tries to convince you to stay.
"Hey... are you sure you want to go home...? You... may not see us again, y'know... well... like this, I mean—"
You're always adamant on going home.
You liked your time here, but you'd rather go home.
It's way less dangerous there, anyways.
I don't doubt Leo would drop his maturity to go to extreme measures.
Perhaps he realizes he can't keep you willingly.
He hates to do it... but force may be necessary now....
His own family don't believe his reasons.
The young woman should go home... not be kept in a dimension where she could be in danger.
Leo is alone in his endeavors, sneaking up on you during your journey before dragging you away.
He's careful when knocking you out before running off to find somewhere to hide you.
Once he does, he restrains you and waits.
His family doesn't care what he thinks... that's fine... he doesn't want to share anyways.
When you wake up, he's sitting beside you cross-legged in some abandoned warehouse within New York.
He explains to you his reasons for not letting you go when you wake.
He loves you, he's attached, he's scared to lose you...
The confession no doubt scares you into shock.
He expresses distaste that his family was so determined to make you leave.
They must've wanted you gone... but he doesn't.
Now you'll never leave him...
Now you'll always need him... after all, isn't he your favorite?
"You're better off here, right? Now you'll never leave me.... I'm still your favorite, right? I think you're my favorite...."
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angellayercake · 8 days
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Oh well @sakuraspoke if you insist on me rambling about Terzo who am I to refuse? ☺️
We know from some interview snippets about him that by the time he becomes papa he is bitter and he hates himself and he is somewhat of a recluse which is clearly a massive contradiction to the caring, entertaining, silly, sexy charmer we see on stage. That man seems a lot more in keeping with the description we see from Bishop Necropolitus Cracoviensis who describes Terzo during his time as a Cardinal. As being a visionary who cares for his flock and revels in sin.
So how did he get here and how does that relate to this song?
I think we can all agree that his hopes for what he would achieve during his reign as Papa were squashed very quickly. He clearly put up a fight and was starting to gain momentum by the end where perhaps he thought it might be possible (hence why he was dragged off stage, humiliated and murdered) but we can see that nothing really went to plan and this is what probably sent him down the spiral of depression and self hatred.
But to bring it all back to 'We'll never have sex'. He created a very specific persona that was very likable and charming and I have no doubt that those are aspects of his personality and he had no lack of partners within the Ministry and without. But they ONLY wanted the Charming Papa™ and when his darker side would reveal itself, his self loathing and dissatisfaction they would run for the hills, if they even stayed long enough to see it. Because he is Papa right? Sex god leader of the Satanic Church, champion of the female orgasm, he is above wanting to be loved or cared for.
He is lonely, depressed, hopeless and desperate for some connection. So he keeps up the facade, keeps accepting the one night stands and casual propositions just to stave off the loneliness for a night or two until he just can't anymore. He closes himself off and comes to terms with the fact that no one will ever want just him.
This is all my standard headcanon for him in general and most of my fics unless otherwise stated but this also leads specifically into banchetto so I will put that under a read more in case anyone doesn't care about that bit 😁
This is basically where he is emotionally at the beginning of Banchetto underneath the hurt about his removal from his position and his brothers interference etc.
So why does he do what he does to poor reader? Well I think personally he has forgotten how to relate to people romantically other than sex. He hasn't had a traditional 'relationship' for many many years probably since he was a very young man and first learned about falling in love and heartbreak.
When he realises that reader is attracted to him he also finds her a distraction from wallowing in his depression and even though he had grown to hate no strings sex he falls back on that easy seduction to give him that taste of connection he craves. That is until he realises how much he hurt her by playing with her and that's when he realises
1. He may have found someone who really does care for HIM not what they can get from Papa. She has seen him at his worst. Complete rock bottom and still she cares?
2. He is beginning to care for her too. He looks forward to seeing her everyday and the light she brings into his life. He wakes up earlier so he can be up as soon as she arrives and he wracks his brains for question after question so he can justify following her around as she works. It's only when she disappears for that week after he cornered her that he realises this though.
And this is why they are taking it so slowly (aside from the fact she really does have a job to do which he tends to forget and at this point has completely forgotten). She has picked up on the fact that this is unfamiliar territory for him and really there is no need to rush right? What could possibly bring their happy little domestic bubble to be popped??? 😈
On that note I will leave it there. If you have got this far I love you 😚😚
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heavyhitterheaux · 11 months
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Teenage Woes Part 3
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Synopsis: You and Jack finally decide on a fair punishment for the triplets, and they get a rude awakening when they are forced out of their comfort zone.
Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader
Read Part 1 and Part 2 first
First Babies of Private Garden Masterlist
Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere
It had been a week since Jack had gotten his privileges back and he wasted absolutely no time once you had told him. At this point, the triplets were still walking on eggshells around you and in order not to do anything to piss you off, if they had a question they wouldn't ask you unless absolutely necessary.
Jack had convinced you to take a bath and had run the water for you along with lighting a few of your favorite candles and adding your favorite bath bombs. Within five minutes, he was climbing into the tub behind you, and you were surprised that it had taken him that long.
Your head was laying on his chest and the two of you were in a comfortable silence when you broke it by poking his cheek and starting to play with his beard.
"Yes, baby?"
"I've thought long and hard about this and if we agree on this, we can move forward with a proper punishment for them."
"I had been thinking too, but you go first." Jack said while kissing the tip of your nose and you smiled.
"They're going to public school and we are no longer paying for them to go to a private school. That comes with privileges and having the right attitude and being respectful."
"At least for a semester, you agree?"
You slowly nodded your head yes.
"No one is allowed to use their cell phone or drive unless we let them. Axel and Ivy need to get part time jobs and Ivy asked me if babysitting Nova counts even though she's 12. I expected her to ask about Cash and Cam seeing that they're only 6."
"No she didn't ask that…" Jack said while stifling a laugh and looking at you in disbelief and all you did was nod.
"And I have another suggestion." Jack started to say and you nodded for him to go on.
"They give us a percentage of their paycheck every two weeks and we tell them it goes towards bills, but we actually put it in another savings account for them and they can't even touch that one until they're 30."
"Hmm, I like that idea. I can open a new account tomorrow."
"One way or another they are going to learn to respect us and I think that this will be the wake up call that they need."
"I think one of the things that sticks out and pisses me off the most is Axel smoking. Knowing that he had to be intubated multiple times when he was born and has a heart murmur. He's lucky that we even let him play soccer. And has asthma. Like is he trying to put himself in the hospital because I'm convinced that he is. I get that I experimented, well we both did, however we didn't do anything that stupid."
"And remember the time we found weed and he tried to blame it on Urban?" Jack added and all you did was shake your head.
"I swear, I don't recognize my kids anymore. At least the other three act like they have some sense."
"When should we tell them?"
"Well school starts back up next week so I can call tomorrow and get them enrolled and can you be in charge of making sure they find jobs?"
"Of course baby, and they can't work for us either. Because I know Ivy will ask."
"They are in for a rude awakening. We'll tell them tomorrow and if someone disobeys our rules, a disciplinary school is next. Never thought I would say that out loud but here we are."
"I hope we don't get to that point, but if we do, so be it."
"I just checked on all of them and Autumn snuck out again. She's not in her room and I watched the security cameras."
"Hmm, she can have her fun now but come tomorrow she's going to be in for it. I don't even have the energy to yell or argue with them anymore. It's the fact that I'm calm and I admit that's probably the scariest thing that I could be."
"Oh, trust me, I know."
All you did was eye him as he leaned down to kiss you.
"I love you."
"And I love you even when you get on my nerves."
"Was that last part really necessary?" Jack asked as he sucked his teeth, but all you did was laugh.
"Of course it was. Wouldn't be me if I didn't say it."
Jack simply rolled his eyes as he began to kiss down your neck and you knew where this was going.
"You aren't tired yet?" You asked and he immediately shook his head no.
"I've missed out on an entire month and I need to make up for lost time so spread your legs and let me work."
The next morning, you got up early and fixed breakfast for everyone for the first time in about a month and a half. Jack woke up about thirty minutes after you and came down to help you. All you could basically put him in charge of was drinks, but you were still grateful to have his company.
Meanwhile upstairs, the triplets had congregated in Axel's room and they were confused since they heard both of you downstairs and knew that something had to be up.
"She's actually cooking…" Ivy whispered, not actually believing it herself.
"Well maybe she forgives us?" Axel suggested but the girls shook their heads no.
"That's way too easy. She couldn't have and she didn’t even say anything about it either."
"Uncle Urby said she holds grudges like no other and the last thing we want to do is be in the line of fire when she gets pissed off."
"But we're her kids. She can't stay mad at us forever."
"Autumn, you've done enough shit for her to be mad at you for the rest of your life." Axel said and she immediately rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, okay. Don't say anything when you cough up a lung knowing that you smoke and have asthma." She quickly fired back as Ivy simply sighed.
Jack suddenly knocked on Axel's door and peeked his head in startling them.
"You three get your brothers and sister and come eat."
"Dad! What is mom up to?" Axel asked and all Jack did was laugh to himself.
"You three will find out soon enough, come on."
The three of them exchanged nervous looks as Jack walked away and went back downstairs.
"Welp, we're all going to die. So it was nice knowing you two." Ivy said before walking out Axel's room to get Nova while Axel went to get his brothers.
Once downstairs, everyone had fixed their plate and was eating at the table when you and Jack were simply eyeing each other making the triplets even more nervous. Ivy quickly caught on with you two exchanging looks and finally asked.
“Um, why are you two looking at each other like that?”
“Babe, you want to tell them?” Jack asked while looking at you as you were sipping on your tea.
“Well, if you insist. Ivy, Axel, Autumn, the oldest of my children who I carried for 33 weeks and had to be resuscitated twice once they cut you out of me even though Autumn claimed that it wasn't a big deal and you all still continue to disrespect me, me and your father have something to tell all of you.”
“Wait…. YOU DIED?” Axel exclaimed since you had actually never told them.
“Not once, but twice. Stay on topic, Axel. And you almost did too, but that's not what this conversation is about." Jack quickly cut in while the girls were looking at you with concern.
“But you never told us that!” Ivy exclaimed and Autumn looked to be upset.
"We need to unpack that because…. WHAT?"
“Another story for another day when the three of you are actually back in my good graces again.”
Nova, Cash, and Cam stopped eating to try and listen in on what was going on with their siblings as they nervously looked on.
“Come next week, the three of you will be going to public school since me and your father are not going to pay for you three to go to private school that has top tier educators and continue to disrespect us so that’s a thing of the past, Ivy and Axel, you two need to get jobs and all three of you will decide which bill you want to contribute to in the house since Autumn already has one. You are not allowed to have your cell phone unless we say so and you can only drive to and from work. If one of you steps a toe out of line, you don’t want to know what is going to come after that because you definitely won’t like it. I do not expect any failing grades either.”
There was only silence for a matter of seconds before you quickly heard their protests.
“PUBLIC SCHOOL?”
“WITH NORMAL PEOPLE!?”
“WE HAVE TO PAY BILLS NOW?!”
“WE HAVE TO RIDE THE BUS TOO?!”
“As long as you live in this house you will abide by our rules and respect them and we aren’t going back on this punishment so you three will have to deal with it.” Jack told them as Ivy simply had her mouth hanging wide open, but her face quickly turned to a look of anger as she looked at Autumn.
“This is all your fault! You told her that we were cut out and not pushed out and looked what happened!” Ivy said while rolling her eyes.
“How is this all my fault? I didn’t tell you to cuss out your teacher!”
“No, but you had to go and be a bitch and be disrespectful to our mother who would do anything for us and you’ve acted out ever since Nova was born because you were jealous that you weren’t the baby anymore!”
“We were only four when she was born!”
“And you still act as if you’re four years old! You almost let Nova fall down the steps ON PURPOSE when she was little and she would have seriously gotten hurt if I didn’t catch her in time!  You’ve always been the one to get in trouble and now we’re in trouble right along with you! And always beg daddy to bail you out when you know that you’re in the wrong. You’re so selfish!”
“How am I selfish? I have covered for you plenty of times when you snuck out with Damien!”
“YOU LITERALLY SNUCK OUT LAST NIGHT!”
“YOU TWO, SHUT IT RIGHT NOW! And we do NOT call each other names, Ivy!” You yelled and the two of them instantly went quiet.
“Ivy, when did you sneak out?” Jack asked while looking at her and all she did was stare back at him while picking off her fingernail polish.
“Don’t lie because we have security cameras.” He continued as Autumn was smirking.
“Autumn wipe that smirk off your face. It looks like we now have to make an executive decision. Babe? They do their junior year and entire senior year in public school.”
“Now, wait a second! I was going to be dance captain this year!”
“Autumn, shut your mouth because I’m not waiting for a damn thing and it looks like they’ll have to choose someone else. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes and Ax, you’ve been mighty quiet but let me tell you if we as much catch you smoking or even smell weed on you knowing that you have asthma, you don’t want to know what’s going to happen. The last thing we ever want is you having an asthma attack and getting a call from the hospital because your inhaler didn’t work. We have gotten enough calls from the hospital concerning you to last more than four lifetimes. When you were born you literally couldn’t even breathe on your own.”
“And no boyfriends or girlfriends so NO dating. Open your mouth to talk back to either of us and we’ll ship you off to military school at this very moment. Your choice, so choose wisely. Now enjoy your breakfast while I make a few calls. Jack, the only thing that they can look on their phones for are jobs today. Once they fill out at least five applications, they have to give it back to you. Do you agree?”
“Sounds like a plan to me.”
“We love the three of you very much, but you’ve left us no choice and have brought this on yourselves. I hope this serves as a good lesson to you and maybe just maybe if you three actually stick to being on your best behavior, you’ll slowly start to earn your privileges back.”
“Mommy?” You heard Cash ask and you quickly turned to him.
“Yes, my baby?”
“Can I have more orange juice?”
“Of course you can and Nova and Autumn come in the living room.”
“Am I in trouble?” Nova asked terrified as you poured juice for Cash and you shook your head no. She hated getting in trouble and would always cry when she was younger if she was caught doing something that she wasn’t supposed to do.  
“No, just need you for a second.”
The three of you walked into the living room and you gestured for them to sit down.
“Autumn, I am tired of this imaginary competition between you and Nova and it needs to stop at this very moment.”
“I…”
“No, and do not pretend to not know what I’m talking about because Ivy is right. We prepped you as much as we could but I didn’t even know I was pregnant with her because I would have liked to have done a better job. You are now 16 years old and she is 12 and looks up to her big sisters and wants to be like you and Ivy. We love all of you EQUALLY and no one has gotten special treatment at any time. So, do a better job of being a sister to her. I don’t have mine anymore and I wish that I did so the two of you better learn to get along. When me and your dad are not here anymore, all you’re going to have is each other. Do you understand?”
“Yes.” She quietly said while looking down at her feet.
“Nova, do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“The two of you can go finish eating.”
“Mom, what ever happened to your sister?” Nova quietly asked as she got up from the couch and Autumn went back into the kitchen.
“It’s not important and it’s a story for another day.”
The triplets were three weeks into the school year when all three of them came through the front door and you could tell that Ivy had been crying. Jack was the first one to notice and asked her what was wrong.
“Ivy? What’s going on?”
“I HAVE TO WORK TODAY! WHEN AM I GOING TO FIND TIME TO DO MY HOMEWORK? AND IT’S SO HARD. I HATE PUBLIC SCHOOL.”
“Me and your mother went to public school and we turned out just fine. You’ll be okay.” Jack replied while shrugging and looking at her, when she was quiet, he spoke again.
“I hope you weren’t expecting sympathy from me because if you were, you need to look elsewhere.”
“But…”
Just then you came down the steps and saw how upset she was and asked what had happened.
“What’s going on?”
“She’s fine. Ivy, go get ready for work and you’ll do your homework once you get back.”
“I AM NOT FINE! Mommy can I PLEASE go back to private school? Public school is scary and the food doesn’t taste good and they don’t have Fiji water in the cafeteria and the drama club sucks, and….”
You held up your hand to cut her off and all she did was sigh.
“Give it a chance, bubs. You’re only three weeks in and I have the utmost faith in you.” You said while pinching her cheek and all she did was sigh.
“You two aren’t changing your minds any time soon, are you?” Axel quietly asked while looking at how frustrated his sister was.
“Nope.” Both of you said at the same time and you went to lay in Jack’s lap as you grabbed his phone from him to order food since you had been busy all day and didn’t really have time to sit down. 
“If I finish my homework before dinner, can I play on my phone for an hour?" Autumn quietly asked and the two of you simply turned around to look at her. 
"Never mind. Can I watch Netflix then?"
"Hmm, what do you think?" Jack asked while looking down at you.
"It's Wednesday. No."
"Anddd there's your answer Autumn. You can read a book instead." Jack said as he looked towards her and all she did was nod her head accepting that as an answer before going upstairs while you scrolled through Jack’s phone.
"You know Nova asked me what happened to my sister a few weeks ago."
"Are you going to tell them?" Jack asked as you handed him his phone for him to add what he wanted to the cart.
"It's not all that important. It's not affecting their lives."
"But it's affecting yours. Not as much as before but it still is."
All you did was shrug.
"No matter how much time has passed and how much she wants to talk to me, I am never giving her the time of day or him for that matter. They knew what they were doing all along for it to come back and kick them in the ass later. She literally will never be in my good graces again. She had more kids other than me so she can focus on them. She literally did drugs while pregnant with me and I was born to addicted to a whole bunch of shit so she can go fuck herself. Anyway, did you add what you wanted? I want a milkshake too."
"I added it. It should be here in an hour."
"Okay. I just want them to understand that when we're not here anymore, all they're going to have is each other and they need to start treating each other better. Especially Autumn and Nova. Nova just kind of brushes it off, but I know it still bothers her. While Autumn can just be downright mean sometimes to her. And the thing is that she had her little jealous phase and I thought she grew out of it, but within the last few months she's doing it again."
"I think because of you telling them that, that they'll come around and be better about it. When I see those two, I get flashbacks of me and Clay and I do not want that happening again. And Autumn has got the message loud and clear now. We aren't putting up with her shit anymore."
"And it won't. In the end, I know that they'll be okay and it will just take a little while for them to get there."
"Now, are you sure we can't make another one?" Jack asked you and you looked up at him like he was crazy.
"Another WHAT?!"
"Um, never mind. I'll ask you later."
"If you are talking about me bringing another person into this world, the answer is no."
"But…"
"We have 3 boys and 3 girls. We are done. My uterus is done. My vagina is done."
"I'll ask you again next week."
All you did was look up to Jack to see him smirking and trying not to laugh and you couldn’t help but to laugh yourself.
"I cannot stand you."
All he did was lean down to kiss you and you continued to laugh as he placed kisses all over your face.
"It's just because you're a damn good mother. Just to watch the way you love and care for them is amazing and I knew from the beginning it was going to be like that, despite what was going on between us."
"Those first two years were hard. Between me wanting to separate from you, postpartum depression, thinking that we were going to have to bury one child, but we're still here."
"We are and thriving despite what may be happening around us."
"I'm so thankful you were able to realize something was wrong with me when that happened." You quietly said as you thought back on it.
"I know you like the back of my hand and inside and out… literally. I know when something is wrong with my baby. But seriously, that scared the absolute shit out of me. Second to their actual birth."
"I can't describe it, but it was a weird feeling. Like an out of body experience you could say."
"And that's why you were nervous to have Nova, scared that it was going to happen again."
"And thankfully it didn't."
"I don't know what I would have done without you and I know I tell you this all the time, but I seriously do not take for granted every single moment I get to have with you. Even if we're having a good day or not. I literally cannot put into words how much I love you."
"The good always outweighs the bad and I love you more than life."
"We can get through anything as long as we have each other."
The triplets were at the top of the steps as they overheard you and Jack talking and if they didn't just feel bad before, they felt even worse now. 
They didn't say anything to each other as Ivy went downstairs to ask the both of you for her keys so that she could drive to work.
"Um, can I have my keys please?"
Since you were laying on Jack’s lap, he simply got up, but picked you up along with him with you letting out a yelp and went to get them out of the safe.
"Jackman, you can put me down now." You said as you laughed. He placed you on your feet before handing Ivy her keys.
"Go to work and then come home. No detours because we will find out." Jack told her and she simply nodded before grabbing both of you and pulling you into a hug, startling you both.
"Um, bubs, are you okay?" You quietly asked while hugging her back.
"Yes, I just love you both a whole lot. I have the best parents in the world."
"Oh. Well we love you too." Jack said while looking down at you confused and all you did was shrug.
"I'll see you both when I get back." Was all that she said before she walked out the door and all you and Jack did was look at each other.
"What just happened?" Jack quietly asked while looking at you, but you were at a loss for words.
"I'm not really sure, but I'm not mad at it."
It was now nearing the end of the semester and the triplets had been on their best behavior and following all of the rules that you and Jack had set in place for them.
The both of you knew that their report cards would be sent home today and were hoping for good results.
You were currently in your room looking over possible dresses that Julissa sent over for an upcoming event and you had told her that by the end of the day, you would decide which one you wanted.
Your door was open as Autumn poked her head in and knocked.
"Mommy?"
"I don't even remember the last time you called me that. Is something wrong?" You said while looking at her in the doorway and she quickly shook her head no.
"Then what's going on? And are you just going to stand in the doorway or come in?" You asked her and she quickly came in to sit next to you and simply stared at you.
"I got my report card." She said while handing it to you.
You took it from her and looked it over seeing that she had gotten all A's and B's.
"This is good, bubs. I'm proud of you." You said while looking back up at her and all she did was start to cry.
"Autumn? What's wrong?" You asked while putting her report card on your dresser and hugging her as she cried into your chest.
"I'm such a horrible daughter and sister. My siblings probably hate me."
"What?! No you aren't! And no one in this house hates you!"
"You and daddy have given me so many chances that I really shouldn't have gotten. And Nova does hate me! I've been nothing but mean to her since she was born!"
"Okay, Autumn, you need to breathe. Like I said no one hates you. Nova is just in her own little world, and has a very big heart. You’re her sister that she looks up to and all she wants is for the two of you to get along. I know that she'll forgive you and she wants the two of you to be close."
"And you went through so much to give birth to us and I'm sorry that I ever said that it wasn't a big deal. You died. Twice. And went through postpartum depression and you were going to separate from daddy and…."
"Pause. How did you know that last part?"
"We overheard the two of you talking." She quietly said while looking up at you.
All you did was sigh.
"Autumn Danielle, all six of you are our greatest joy and I wouldn’t change a thing because that's how we got to this point. You've been doing a lot better and all we want is for all of you to be successful, respectful, and responsible, knowing that you can lose everything in a blink of an eye. Just continue to do better, okay?"
"Okay." She said while sniffling and hugging you tighter.
"I love you and I'm sorry if I don't say it enough or don't act like it." Autumn added while playing with her bracelet that you and Jack had bought her for her birthday.
"I love you too and that is never going to change. We are always going to be here for you no matter what."
Just then Axel peeked into the room to see the two of you and made his way in also having his report card in hand.
"Mom?"
"She's occupied! Get your own!" You heard Autumn yell and all you did was laugh.
"What the? She is MY OWN. She was my mother before she was yours! I'm two minutes ahead of you!"
"And I also made it in here before you so you can leave. We were having a moment."
"Autumn, be nice! Ax, let me see the report card."
Once again, you saw all A's and B's.
"I expected nothing less, very proud of you."
"And I haven't smoked and I got your favorite muffins. They're downstairs."
"Oh, I would have known if you smoked anyway. I look at the number of puffs you have left on your inhaler. When you were using it more, you kept saying you needed another one."
"Um…"
"Bubs, I have 24 years on you. I wasn't born yesterday." You said while smirking at him.
"Autumn, move over." Ax said and she scooted over to make more room for him. 
"Mom? Can we have tacos later?"
"Text your dad the ingredients that I need."
About two hours later, Jack walked in to see three of his oldest children surrounding you on the bed with all of you knocked out sleeping and all he could do was smile.
All he did was snap a quick picture to show you later. 
Hearing his footsteps, you fluttered your eyes open to see your husband smiling at you.
"What?" You asked while smiling back at him and all he did was hand you his phone to look at the picture he took.
"No matter how old they get, they're always going to need us."
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nothing-ramblings · 6 months
Text
i DO think laios is "autism creature" autistic. I think he's actually a great example of that. Most of the time i see the autism creature associated with special interests and hyperfixations and there's no way you could argue that's not a trait he has, it's a major plotnpoint that drives the story forward along with his other motivation. Something I also see a lot is the austism creature being used as an example of cluelessness, because of its expression. How are you gonna point to his social awkwardness, the fact that he's literally completely clueless about making people uncomfortable unless it's explicitly stated to him, and say he doesn't fit that description. I'n not sure what "tumblr" autism is supposed to mean, the person was probably talking about the more palatable traits people discuss more openly, but do you really think people aren't socially awkward in this webbed site?
i saw a rlly good post reacting to someone else's rotten take, unfortunately at the time i was too tired to read the full post and i ended up losing it, so i don't remember what all it said but basically the rotten take was calling laios creepy (in a "funny haha way" to disguise it) due to his traits, and op of the post i saw was explaining how that's fucked up. I think from what I skimmed it was very personal, comparing their own experiences to laios and honestly that might be my favorite thing about him. He doesn't just have the "palatable" traits that people are comfortable seeing. He is clueless, he had no idea someone disliked him, he even thought they were close friends, because that person never let him know when he was crossing a boundary until it was too much. Soon after this almost the opposite happens, where he doesn't believe someone else wants to be his friend, because now he's aware that he can't pick up on social cues, and he also knows he caused this person discomfort before, so why would they want to be his friend? He's "messy" in that he has a lot of traits people like to avoid when talking about autism, because it's stuff neurotypicals don't like.
He's literally that kid who people would be like "oh well if i knew he was autistic i wouldn't have treated him badly" (which is stupid, you should treat people well in general and not be an asshole then apologize because someone is actually neurodivergent or mentally ill). And guess what? He has friends who love him. They know he's awkward and clueless and has "weird" interests and they still love him. He has people who will stand up for him even after coming to the conclusion that he's "a little creepy" because they know he's a good person, and they like his honesty. Someone explicitly admits they envy his ability to be so openly himself, even after that same person tried to frame that trait as a bad thing, because they realized what they hated wasn't laios honesty but the fact that laios is able to act that way, while most people feel trapped by social rules and don't have that same freedom to be themselves. Laios can be himself not because society accepts him, in fact the first assumption when the elves learn he likes monsters is that he must be prone to evil. Because that's weird and creepy. Society does not accept him. His friends do. His sister does, she loves him and looks up to him as an adult as much as she did as a child. He has a support system. He is loved. Even people who don't necssarily love him know he could never become evil, even if they also think his special interest is a bit creepy. Because they know laios, actually know him, and they know that in his awkwardness he's still a kind person. He misses a lot of social cues, sometimes he says things that are tone deaf without realizing at all, and his friends know he means no harm. He just struggles with these things.
I think laios is a very good example of how nobody is unlovable, regardless of how awkward or clueless you might be, even if your special interest is something perceived as creepy. To me Laios is a reminder for anyone who needs to hear it that you are deserving of love too. Maybe you just beed to find a better support system, and that might take a while, but there's people who will love you the way you are, and accept you the way you are
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tendermiasma · 6 months
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Hi! Have you ever struggled with comparing your own progress to progress of other artists? Or do you have any tips how to avoid that? What I mean is - most of the time I feel inspired and motivated by progress of other artists, but sometimes when I see someone else achieving unimaginable level of great skill in, let's say, only 3 years or less, I feel like I failed as an artist and like I should just give up, despite knowing all of my hardships along the way, and that we all have our own pace.
Would no longer creating art make you happier in life? Would you find another passion and join that community and end up comparing yourself to someone else all over again? It's human nature to compare ourselves but it's what we do with those feelings that matter. I see three categories: People that become motivated and become better artists, those that fall into toxicity and tear down other artists, and those that fall away from art. You're definitely in the first category since by and large you spend your time putting those feelings to good use. It seems you know the healthy and productive way to think but once in a while it just sort of sucks to not be as good as you want to. That's actually okay because it sounds like it hasn't ever stopped you from continuing to make art. We will never be free from self-criticism and that's what pushes us forward. As someone who's been doing art for a long time, it's not completely avoidable because we're human, but I get wanting to handle it better in the moment and not ruin your day. Remember that just because your art and other people's art exist in the same space doesn't mean that viewers only want to see the other guy's art.
I think it's helpful to pinpoint exactly what said artist is doing that makes you discredit yourself and whether it actually relates to you at all (it never does). You say it's because they progressed so quickly in a short amount of time. If you put that person's piece next to someone else's who reached that in a longer time than them, you wouldn't know unless you were specifically told. Art can't convey that and (once again) as an artist who has been drawing for a long time, I literally do not care about how long someone else's art took. It's the most useless metric and doesn't tell you whether the actual piece is good. What's good has no bearing on the length of time.
There are things we cannot separate ourselves from because we are the creator of our art. We don't have the ability to view it as a neutral third party like we do for this other artist who became awesome in 3 years. There's a good chance they're looking at another artist and are as frustrated as you are. I learn this about artists I look up to all the time. You're self-critical, which is often very good like I mentioned above, but the key to happily coexisting with it is becoming very lucid about the fact that your goalpost will always be moving because that's just the way perfection is designed. It's fine to chase it as long as we keep in mind that it's an ideal and not a destination. If you can't find fault with your current art, it's "oh, well someone else got this good in LESS TIME, etc," like you can watch yourself take the thing out of the ground and stick it farther down the field in real time. I think it's a loss to deny yourself the art you could be creating in several years because you failed to obtain perfection, just like every other artist. It sounds like you know what to do but you're at that point where the change has to come from within since it's impossible to never compare ourselves to our peers.
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selya711-twiste · 2 years
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hope you’re doing well 🙏 do you have any thoughts or hcs on how rollo would flirt?? 😳
Oh do I.
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how rollo would flirt...
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...He doesn't seem like someone who'd call anything he does with good intentions "flirting."
I don't think Rollo has ever imagined he'd pursue a romantic relationship with anyone (or anything intimate with another person in general.) Rollo's knowledge of courting seems very textbook, thus he never thought of applying what he learned to himself and forgone the idea of ever performing such rituals.
When he finds himself drawn to a person... It starts slow. Not even Rollo himself is aware of it at first.
If you're a student at Noble Bell College, regardless of your standing or what you've done to gain his attention, he would always offer to lend a helping hand with anything that concerns you. Sometimes he assists you with your studies, on other days you're chatting about things that interest you two like the sights in the city and daily occurrences in the school.
If you're the prefect of Ramshackle dorm who he met during the three-day trip to the City of Flowers, it would be more evident to Rollo the speed at which he developed feelings of fondness for you. You don't have a lot of time away from the other NRC students unless you slink out, which is Rollo's opportunity to come to see you away from their lingering eyes.
He's already busy as the student council president, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have time for others. Though it may appear like simple, passing conversations, the words he tells you are meaningful and make you feel cherished.
The baked goods from the local bakery in the city are his go-to, and he shares them with you. With the matter of money, you want to pay him back but he declines... He treats you every time they have something fresh.
Traditional gestures like bouquets of flowers and handwritten letters are reserved for when you two have established something. For now, this is the language the two of you shared. You two have become like close friends, whether or not you're aware of the favoritism you might be receiving.
It's known across the campus that Rollo is someone who keeps to himself. It's either you're the one who notices how close he has become with you lately, or someone else brings it up to you.
When Rollo himself notices how fond he's become of you, he'll simply say he's doing his duties. The longer this goes on, however, he'll scoff, look away with a handkerchief to his lips, and then tell himself that it's nothing noteworthy. He'll deny his feelings for you, but this act alone seals his fate.
The time he spends with you is well within the confines of his schedule. He can't dare risk his grades or responsibilities even for you, but that means he's dedicating his free time to be with you.
The Noble Bell students he dutifully looks after haven't caught on to his blooming feelings, fortunately. They think it's nice that the president is taking steps to have companions, so no teasing here. The last thing they'd want is to disrespect Rollo, after all.
He would feel his heart skip a beat if one day you were the one looking for him and asking around for his whereabouts, all of his schoolmates kindly leading you to him.
When it comes to that point, I do think Rollo is going to take forever to confess- if he even wants to admit there's something to confess. He'll obsess with the object of his affection for a while and, as lightly as possible, think they're the problem. He's the one who looked forward to seeing you, but over time he's now thinking you're the one who somehow hexed him, whether or not you had the magic for it.
So, he has affection for you that he does not know what to do with.
It's almost endearing, actually.
Between the assistance he provides you, the solemn promises, the fresh croissants you share together, and the warmth between you two no matter the season...
You're the key figure in getting him out of his head.
Are you going to reciprocate his feelings, or continue this game of cat and mouse?
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