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#anyway never give up hope that things will get better
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Favorite Season 6 fics
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So these used to be called "Fic recs for my BFF", but unfortunately I was unable to sway her to buddie, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ these are just for me now (and you guys too I guess 😅)
Season 6
🔥Curl Up in My Heart and Let Me Keep You by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Animal Transformation | 10K | Teen): When an orange tabby cat starts hanging around the Diaz house, Eddie doesn't think anything of it. The little guy's cute and cuddly, and seems to always know when Eddie's having a bad time. Weird how the cat's never around when Buck is, though.
🔥let the world have its way with you by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-Coma AU | 54K | Explicit): “It’s just that—I died,” Buck continues, voice unsteady enough that Eddie wonders if this is the first time he’s acknowledged that out loud. “I died, and there’s so much more. There’s so much more I want to do, things I don’t even know I want to do yet, and I almost had the chance to have and live them taken away. I don’t want to die and regret missing out on everything else, Eddie.” “So let’s make a list,” Eddie says. “Let’s do them.” or, a bucket list that’s really about buck needing to make a change and an eddie who’s ready to do anything to see him fall in love with life again. it takes some crossing off for eddie to realise—the thing at the top of the list in his own heart? it’s been right here all along
🔥like a dog with a bird at your door by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-S6, Getting Together | 51K | Explicit): The kid with blood pouring down his shins is not so far from the dog lonely enough that he thinks breaking his housetraining is worth it for the ten minutes of berating that come with it, the ten minutes of undivided, if reluctant, attention. Buck thinks, sometimes, that at least he wasn’t the kind of puppy that gets put in a sack and drowned at birth. He wasn’t always unwanted. And he isn’t anymore. or, evan “i love you like a dog” buckley has only ever known how to love like, well, a dog, but maybe eddie diaz is the kinda guy to give a flea-bitten mongrel a forever home
🔥Something Dumb to Do by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S6, Getting Together | 8K | Explicit): "Too bad we can't just date each other." Eddie laughs. "What?" "No, I'm serious!" Buck sets his beer down, the better to gesture with both hands, face lighting up, and Eddie just—he really loves the guy, okay. Ridiculous as he is. "It would be so much easier! You wouldn't have to introduce a new person to Chris—he already likes me anyway—and you could tell Pepa so she'll stop setting you up on dates that don't go anywhere—" "And what would you get out of this?" Eddie asks, grinning. — Or: Buck and Eddie try something out together. (Part 1 of homeward bound)
🔥find a way to you (if it kills me) by foxwatson/ @eddiediazes (Post S6E13: Mixed Feelings, Pining | 19K | Mature): It’s something about the way Eddie phrases it. Something about the combination of his words and the way he’s staring down at the floor, and the flush in his cheeks and the way he’s fidgeting. Buck thinks, abruptly, he’s going to ask me on a date. “Well I - wanted to tell you first, and I need someone to watch Chris, anyways - I know he’s getting old enough now he doesn’t like feeling like he’s got a babysitter, so I was hoping - sorry. Not the point. Uh. I have a date on Saturday.” Just as abruptly as his own hopes had come soaring up above the cloud cover of his own unawareness - they go crashing back down to the floor - to the basement, and into the mud. “A date?” Buck rasps out. — the one where eddie decides to start dating again, buck figures out his own feelings just a minute too late, and then he spends a week going through the five stages of grief
🔥Being Eddie by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Time Travel, Post-S6, Getting Together | 80K | Teen): When Eddie starts seeing a new therapist, he’s presented with the opportunity to revisit several days from his past and right regrets that still bother him. OR: Eddie goes through the time travel therapy process of the 2009 Canadian TV show Being Erica.
🔥 Evan Buckley & The Coma-Verse of Madness by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Coma AU, Multiverse | 58K | Teen): After being struck by lightning on a call, Buck experiences a plethora of alternate realities showing him different directions his life could have taken. Fighting hard to get home, Buck learns what, or who, is important to him in every lifetime.
🔥 Both Blade and Branch by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S6 | 62K | Mature): The chances of being struck by lightning twice are incredibly minute, but Buck still manages to pull it off. During a double date with Marisol and Natalia, nonetheless. Eddie manages to resuscitate him, but as Buck recovers from yet another trauma, Eddie can’t help but notice there’s something very different about him. He’s not quite sure what version of Buck he got back.
🔥 where all of the people dancing and clapping would greet me with such warmth by trysetmeonfire/ @try-set-me-on-fire (Season 6, Magical Realism | 15K | Mature): In the fall, Buck begins to disappear. (or: Buck can see that people become transparent when they're about to die) (Part 2 of All I Am, All That I Am)
🔥 Ace of Hearts by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S6, Getting Together | 9K | Teen): "I've been wondering…" Maddie pauses, watches Buck make a face like he's bracing to be smacked. "What happened with Eddie? You two were dancing around it for so long, and then… what, it just didn't work out? Was the date really that bad?" She's expecting another wince, or even for him to duck out of the conversation entirely, but instead Buck is staring at her like she's grown a second head. "Maddie. I've never been on a date with Eddie." Or: the poker game was a date. It takes Buck a while to catch on, though.
🔥 situations, circumstances, miscommunications ( i just may like some explanations ) by heartbeatdiaz / @lonelychicago (Didn't Know They Were Dating | 4K | Teen): "You didn't know?" Eddie asks, calmer but not less confused. He frowns. "How could you not know?" "You never said anything?" Buck tilts his head to the side. "We were dating?” “I guess not,” Eddie sighs. His heart is beating a little faster, an unpleasant buzz beneath his skin as he all but chokes on a feeling he can’t quite name— it could be hurt or disappointment or maybe a mix of both. In that moment, he knows three things very clearly. 1. Buck is going to be the death of him. 2. He is in love with the most dense, most oblivious man on planet Earth. 3. He is too gay and, honestly, too old for this shit.
🔥listen to you breathing (is where I wanna be) by Yavilee/ @theladyyavilee (Presumed Dead | 41K | Teen): The thing is – and Eddie should have known this, has been taught this cruel lesson over and over and over again – the thing is most of the time the worst day of your life will start like just any other day. A million small moments, so familiar and mundane you almost don’t even notice them slipping by - until you would give anything to go back and get just one more. (You can’t.) — Or the one where Buck is presumed dead after a building collapse and Eddie has to live through the reminder that tomorrow isn't promised to anyone
🔥Eddie Diaz vs The Feelings by ElvenSorceress/ @elvensorceress (Season 6, Sexuality Crisis, Demisexual Eddie | 62K | Explicit): Eddie dives into the mysteries of attraction, romantic love, and asexuality because there's a good chance he's fallen in love with his best friend. AKA demisexual!Eddie figures out he’s demi and finds the happily ever after he’s been longing for
🔥tomorrow will always and forever now be today (tomorrow is our always and forever) by withmeornotatall/ @chronicowboy (Post-S6, Time Loop | 43K | Mature): "Think I can get a hug from my best man on my wedding day?" he asks, quietly hopeful in a way that makes Eddie want to tear off his skin. "Sure," Chris replies with a shrug, turning to throw Eddie a cheeky grin. "Dad, Buck needs a hug." Two things happen at once then: Eddie has to plaster on a smile authentic enough to convince the one person on this planet that knows him inside out—except he doesn't really have to fake his smile, not at first, because of number two—he sees groom-Buck for the first time. And groom-Buck is every bit as beautiful as Eddie might have imagined him over the years. For a moment, Eddie falls into the greatest betrayal his brain has ever laid out for him, imagining that he might have got to see Buck like this for the first time from the other end of the aisle— (OR: eddie gets trapped in a time loop on the day buck marries natalia)
🔥 Muscle Memory by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S6, Amnesia AU | 40K | Teen): After a disappointment in his personal life, Buck wakes up one morning to find everyone he loves has forgotten him completely. No memories. No recognition. Almost like he was never really there.
🔥 but i can see all along, love (it was you all the way down) by diazchristopher/ @captain-hen (Post-S6, Time Loop | 28K Mature): He puts his laptop away after a bit, and paces the length of his apartment as he tries to take stock of the situation at hand. One: The date is March 22nd, 2024. Two: It has been March 22nd for 3 days now. Three: Buck is trapped in some kind of time loop that is forcing him to relive this day. Four: Eddie is, apparently, in love with him. And. And. Five: Buck doesn’t feel the same way.
🔥 a blaze in the dark by woodchoc_magnum/ @woodchoc-magnum (Post-S6, Eddie Coming Out | 117K | Explicit): Set post-Season 6, where Buck has inadvertently sacrificed his friendship with Eddie in order to focus on his new relationship with Natalia, and is shocked when Eddie comes out to the team and subsequently reveals that he is dating a guy.
AUs
🔥Nothing Left But You by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars ("Blip" AU, Post-S4E13: Suspicion | 27K | Teen | Warning: MCD): In May of 2021, 25% of Earth's population suddenly disappears. Including Eddie. In May of 2026, they all come back. Eddie finds himself suddenly in the middle of a world he doesn't recognize, where the people he loves most have changed significantly.
🔥 Your Love is an Oil Slick (It Glows like Rainbows, It Stains My Soul) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Canon Divergent - Supernatural Elements, Ghost Buck | 67K | Explicit): When Eddie's son claims he has an imaginary friend, Eddie doesn't think much of it. Christopher is seven, it's what kids do. But then weird things start happening around the house, and Eddie starts dreaming about a handsome blue-eyed man. Turns out, Christopher's friend isn't so imaginary. Their house is haunted.
🔥like when the sun came out by spaceprincessem/ @spaceprincessem (Canon Divergent, Ghosts | 39K | Mature): He completely pulls the charger from the wall as he fumbles to put in his passcode. He doesn’t know who to call first. Everyone is busy, carrying on with their lives and Buck is stuck here in the loft with the terrifying ghost of his childhood like an omen. Out of the corner of his eye he catches the Crooked Smiled Man now standing in the dark entrance way to his bathroom. He swallows around the taste of blood in his mouth, hands shaking, useless as his list of contacts blur beneath the burn of tears. Eddie Eddie Eddie. He doesn’t know where the feeling comes from, but it’s sudden and sharp and excruciating. Eddie is the first name at the top of his list, his most recent calls and texts, and he doesn’t hesitate to hit the call button. [or buck can see ghosts au]
🔥All My Shattered Oaths by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Vampires AU | 107K | Explicit): Eddie wants to stay away from his family’s legacy and give his son a normal life. Buck’s desperate to find a way to get over the love he lost. Fate has other plans for both of them.
🔥 Further Than Blood (Or Than Bones) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Vampires AU | 50K | Explicit): Once, Eddie chose to save a newly turned against his better judgment. Five hundred years ago, Buck was saved by a rescuer he thought was a hallucination. Now they're together again and about to find out just how far either of them will go to try and deny what they are to each other.
🔥 let it pour out of your soul series by Rianne/ @rianneeyre (Magical Realism AU, Witch Eddie | 3 works | 71K | Complete):
collectively unconsciously composed (S4E6: Jinx | 46K | Explicit): Or: in which the author re-watched Buck Begins and Jinx and thought: what if this was gayer and had actual magic?
that systematic drug (PWP | 5K | Explicit): Eddie’s mouth goes dry when he opens the door and sees Buck. He’s clean-shaven and with his hair carefully styled back, smiling at Eddie sweetly and a little teasingly. Buck is wearing his dark jeans and his light blue v-neck polo shirt, the one that’s tight enough that it shows off the bulge of his biceps and the definition of his pecs and abs. Eddie knows this shirt. Buck's favourite, because he knows he looks good in it.
something binding us together (Established Buddie | 20K | Teen): Or: Eddie plans a long-avoided visit to his parents, discovers some things about his magic, and begins to build his family a home in LA's witching community.
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perseephoneee · 2 days
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𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓥𝓘𝓘
In which, you, a lady of the ton, are forced to participate in courting season. Except that courting season comes with one particularly silver tongued Prince who is making it his mission to drive you absolutely insane.
↳ fic masterlist  ↳ ship exchange ↳ taglist
a/n: the penultimate chapter, everyone. I can't believe we've made it so far. i hope this story kinda works...it was my first time doing longform and one day i will rewrite all of this to make more sense, but for now its as it is. I love you all.
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Loki knew it was improper of him to have met you without a chaperone-like that, but he couldn't find it in himself to care. He wanted, no need, to see you. Damn the consequences. Still, guilt gnawed at him. You were innocent in these games, merely appeasing a figure bigger than yourself. He could relate to that.
On Sundays, he had breakfast with his mother. Thor was usually in meetings with the Allfather, but Loki was never truly wanted there and preferred to spend time with the lady of the house anyway. Their usual tea and assortment of pastries didn’t improve wasn't his mood, though, and he still felt contemplative. Frigga noticed.
"My son, what is wrong?" She questioned, putting her teacup down. She always drank jasmine, a delicacy they got from Odin's dealings with China. She preferred the lighter floral flavor to the Queen's English breakfast tea.
"Nothing is wrong, Mother," Loki lied, the words rolling off his tongue with ease. He was always good with lies. Unfortunately, his mother was even better at seeing through them.
"It wouldn't have anything to do with the Chilton girl, would it? The one your brother didn't marry?" Frigga delicately grabbed a scone as if she were discussing the weather. She was trained to gather information without making it seem like she was. Another thing Loki learned from her. 
"The mamas of the ton gathered for tea the other day, and her Grandmother was discussing it," Frigga continued on. "Dreadful woman, truly, I don't envy those two girls."
Loki hid a laugh behind his hand, coughing instead and taking another sip of tea. 
"She was very loudly complaining about her youngest granddaughter's willful spirit and how it would give her a heart attack one of these days," Frigga chuckled. Loki got the sense she remembered the many times he and Thor had given her a scare.
"Some of the other mamas made comments about how you and she seemed to spend more time together than she and Thor," Frigga spooned some sugar into her tea. "So, my son, I will ask you again if anything is wrong."
Loki took a pause at that, holding his tongue. He drummed his fingers on the table. 
"I won't answer things you already know."
"Did something happen?" His mother raised a brow, a challenge in her gaze. His stubbornness was less from his father and more from his mother. She could will any man into submission.
"Nothing happened, mama," Loki sighed. Not a lie. Nothing happened. Although he wanted it to happen. He wanted to press his lips to yours, breathe in your scent, hold you so you could never fall away from him. Instead, he let go. He wouldn't be the stain on your life that he is on his fathers. 
Frigga pursed her lips, observing him. She set down her tea cup and rested her hands on the table, something she only did when she was about to say something of importance. Loki braced himself for a lecture. 
"Your brother is not a jealous man, and your father is a hard one to please," Frigga stated. "The only thing in the way of your happiness is yourself. I did not raise a fool." With that, Frigga excused herself from tea, leaving her son alone at the table. The only sound left in the room was the clicking of the grandfather clock, the minute hand matching the pace of his thoughts. 
Loki liked you. He might even love you. That was the only logical explanation for his delusions. He rubbed his eyes, hating the tension building up behind them as he thought of the chaos he had caused by even getting involved in the life of you. 
"Mother said I might find you here," Thor said from the doorway, walking over to the now vacant seat. Loki glanced up as Thor poured himself some tea. Or attempted to. He spilled some creamer and burned his fingers, picking up the cup from the body, not the handle. 
"You need to wait for it to cool," Loki sighed, wiping up the spilled creamer. It's appalling to Loki that his oaf of a brother is the one expected to take over the Odinson household. 
"I don't often drink tea."
"Clearly."
"But that's not why I'm here, brother," Thor ignores his jab, gingerly sipping his tea and visibly relaxing when it doesn't burn his tongue. 
"Oh joy," Loki leaves the table, strolling towards one of the setees. He, of course, does this quite dramatically. 
"I always thought you be clever, but I am shocked to find you acting so idiotic," Thor puts his tea down, standing up and heading Loki's way. 
"How dare you–"
"Lady Y/N is obviously enamored with you, and you with her. I don't understand why you aren't doing anything about it," Thor sighs. "Is it your own stubbornness? A sense of pride? Please explain it to me."
"I am not enamored with her, and it is not stubbornness," Loki hisses. "She can do better than me, a second son, anyway."
"Is that what you truly believe? That you are really just a second son?"
Loki doesn't respond to that. He just stares out of the window overlooking the room. His mother was inspired by Greek architecture and, therefore, put arched pillars as separators for the open windows. They overlooked the veranda, which was starting to transition into autumn. Oh, how time has passed. 
"I will be leaving for France in the coming months."
Loki turned to his brother, hiding a shock that otherwise would have covered his face. 
"Leaving? For what?"
"For war," Thor said. "Napolean is out of exile, and his troops are approaching Waterloo. I intend to be there alongside my brothers."
"You must be mad."
"Perhaps," Thor laughed. "But I have always wanted to fight, not to sit behind a desk and manage the affairs of a household. You have always been a better diplomat. I much prefer being a soldier." His brother took a seat on the settee, running a hand through his hair and waiting for Loki to sit down. "Allfather will be declaring you the heir as soon as you are wed. So, no, Loki, you are not the second son. You are the better one."
"I don't deserve you," Loki frowned, finally sitting down next to Thor. "You are a better brother than I could ever be."
"Life has not always been kind to you; that is alright; you are learning," Thor said, placing a hand on Loki's shoulder, demanding his attention. "You deserve peace, and you are allowed to have it."
It is not often that Loki becomes emotional. He is used to putting aside his own wants for the needs of the crown. He is used to enduring verbal backlash from his father over every little thing. He is used to being ignored when his brother enters a room. So often, he felt like a tablepiece in his own home. But truly, he was an idiot. His brother saw him the whole time. 
Without another word, Loki embraced his brother, shocking them both. He was done being a tablepiece. He wanted to be seen. 
~
"Letter!" Ivy screamed from the bottom of the stairs, immediately being shushed by one of the housekeepers. Immediately after your rendezvous with Loki, you had told Ivy everything. All of your fears, wants, and concerns. You had actively been courted by Thor; you couldn't pursue Loki. But he put you in a compromising position that could have gotten you in trouble in society. Did you like Loki? Or did you convince yourself you did? These were the questions swirling around your brain all week. Ivy was in favor of you running off and eloping if only to annoy Grandmother. You hit her with a pillow for that statement. 
"Why would I be receiving a letter?" You ask, descending the stairs as you glared at the offending item. 
"No clue, but I think you should look at it," Ivy said coyly. You got the distinct impression she knew exactly what this letter was about. You took it out of her grasp, peeling off the wax seal and reading the inked words. 
Meet me at the ball by midnight tonight when we first conversed. 
Loki
"So?" Ivy peered over your shoulder. "What did he say?"
"Poetic things," you drawled. "He has such a way with words."
"You're lucky the man likes your sharp tongue; otherwise, you'd scare off all the suitors," Ivy sighed. You suppressed a small smile. "So? Are you going?"
"Did you write this?" You ask her, turning around and crossing your arms. 
"Of course I didn't!"
"Really?"
"I am not one to lie, sister," Ivy grabbed your hands, pulling you closer. "I am only the messenger. A messenger that is urging you to listen for once in your life." You only glared at your sister. 
"I have nothing to wear."
"I already bought you a dress."
"You've been planning this, haven't you?"
"Perhaps," Ivy shrugged. "Now, c'mon! I want enough time to transform you."
You indeed didn't have a choice. Ivy was persistent when she set her mind to something. She yanked your hair left and right to transform it into a perfectly curled and pinned high bun. The dress she chose was unlike anything you had ever seen before, and you had no clue where she could've possibly afforded something like it. It was a deep green with a traditional empire waist, but the bodice was covered in a lacy emerald green fabric and decorated with a glimmery trim. The skirt faded to a lighter emerald green at the bottom, giving the appearance of a forest being lit up by the sunrise. You wore your mother's necklace to match, something that grounded the outfit into something wholesome yet romantic. 
"You look ethereal," Ivy looked at you in the vanity mirror. "You look like Mom."
You smiled, turning around to envelop your sister in a hug. "I love you, Ivy." She just squeezed you tighter. "I never want to go to another ball again; this is ridiculously tiresome." Ivy laughed at that and let you go, smoothing down the parts of your dress that got scrunched up. 
This event took place outside, a last-ditch effort to enjoy the weather before winter set in. The ball was set on the lake, with a variety of lanterns floating through the waters and hanging around the pavilion where guests danced. It looked like a twinkling city, and it was one of the few times when your breath was taken away. 
You were already getting more stares than usual from other people, perhaps because it was the first time you dressed up. Or perhaps because everyone knew that Thor didn't propose to you. You ignored their stares and found the first drink you could. It was a long way till midnight, and your nerves were already getting the better of you. You hiked up your skirts and found your way to the water's edge, where workers were helping guests set out lanterns of their own. You asked one of them if the lights were just for decoration or if there was a specific meaning. 
"To drive out the darkness of winter and hope for a longer spring, m'lady," he bowed, offering you a lantern of your own. You accepted graciously, finding a quiet place farther down the shore to push your lantern out. 
"Making a wish?" a familiar voice said. You turned to see Loki, arms crossed and looking every bit the prince he was meant to be. 
"Driving away the darkness, at least that's what they told me," you gestured towards where most of the partygoers were. 
"I believe in some traditions; it is also to honor the dead."
"What a somber occasion for a party."
"I surmise they didn't truly know the reason; they thought it would be pretty." Loki shrugged, earning a chuckle from you. You closed up again, remembering that awkward encounter all those nights ago. Turning to your lantern, you looked at the water before returning to the prince. 
"We need more lanterns," you declared, marching back to the initial servant who gave you yours. Loki followed behind, not saying anything, but you could tell he wanted to ask. You got three more lanterns and passed two to Loki, returning to the spot you scoped out before. 
"Do I dare ask what you're doing?"
"Honoring the deceased," you crouched down, taking one of the lanterns from Loki so you had three. He joined you on the ground, letting you have a moment with your three lanterns. Taking a breath, you pushed them all out on the water. He waited for a second to let his drift away as well. 
"To your sister," you said, bowing your head slightly. 
"To your family, may they find brighter shores," Loki breathed, eyes softening as he looked at you. 
You both continued sitting on the shores, not making a move to get up. If anyone caught you in this position, it would be trouble, but you couldn't find it in yourself to care. 
"We can't go back, can we?" you whispered, looking out at the lanterns getting farther and farther from shore.
"No, we can't."
"Then, why haven't you asked me?" your voice cracked slightly, your eyes finding Loki's. 
"Because I'm worried I don't deserve you."
"That isn't up to you to decide, is it?" you inquired, raising a brow. Loki's mouth tilted up in a smile as if trying his best to suppress it but failing miserably. 
"I should probably ask then."
"Most likely, before the fireworks start and I am unable to hear you stumble through your speech," you jested, sliding back into your old routine so easily. Loki sat up, offering you a hand, which you took gratefully as you smoothed out, your dress. 
"Such a sharp tongue on you; will that ever change?" Loki questioned. 
"Most likely not."
"Good," Loki grinned. "I wouldn't want anything else."
"You're stalling."
"I might be a wordsmith, but being vulnerable is not something I particularly enjoy," Loki responded. "But with you, I am forced to be vulnerable, and it rather terrifies me. Except, I keep coming back despite that fear because a day without you is a day without the sun." Loki let out a breath, brows furrowed. He looked so serious, and you thought you had never seen him so handsome. "Y/N…marry me."
"Yes," you responded, grinning. "Now, I think I am owed something."
"Yes, yes you are."
Loki wasted no time in pressing his lips to yours, gentle yet strong in a way that had you yearning for more. The fireworks erupted in the background, the party cheering for the colorful display of lights and excitement. You yourself felt like a firework, quickly bursting into a million specks coating the sky. And you wouldn't have it any other way.
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taglist: @eleniblue @iwrite-things @youneedanap @huntress-artemiss @linaax @pisces-celeste @marygoddessofmischief @gruftiela @saay-karani @foxherder @lover-of-books-and-tea @lilaclaufeyson @gardasngan @evasmlp @swampespresso
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bitethedevil · 1 day
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How do you think Raphael would react to feeling loved (not even necessarily in a romantic way—it could also be him feeling appreciated and loved platonically)?
Raphael and Love
(As always, these are just my interpretations of him. It’s dark, but I trust that you have read my “ask”-section and knew it probably would be beforehand anyway. I feel like I’ve made a post about Raphael and love before, but I can’t find it anywhere, so I’m using your ask for it. Hope that’s alright <3)
He would love it. He’d bask in it. He would get addicted to it so fast and it would fascinate him. Not in any healthy or soft way though, far from it. Your love is a tool that is to be explored and exploited for his own pleasure and morbid curiosity, platonic or not.
Testing limits
Ah, so you say you love him: Are you sure about that? If you really do love him, how far are you willing to go? If you truly loved him, surely, he could do whatever he wanted with you, right? He would constantly test your adoration to him, and each little line that you let him cross only means that he will go even further the next time. I am not talking about just ‘making you jealous’ or something like that. I am talking truly abusive and horrible shit. He will literally not stop until he knows that you would literally suffer the worst torments, die, and kill for him.
Making up
What happens then when you snap? He is definitely the type to lovebomb someone and effectively winning them back with all he has got. It is him loosening and tightening the leash. He would give back all that love you craved in return for yours…Until he knows he has got you and then it is back to dissecting you for weaknesses again, like a child seeing how many limbs they can pull off an insect before it dies.
Jealousy and ownership
You are his property. He won’t accept anyone even looking or thinking about you. If possible, keeping you locked away from everything else is the ideal. Why would you need to see other people, if you allegedly loved him more than anyone else? Isolation, control, full attention on him…
It’s the same thing when it comes to affection and intimacy. It will be very dependent on what he wants and likes. I don’t believe it would be entirely one-sided though. He will still touch you and make you feel good, but more in the way that one explores a new and expensive toy to see how it works, and it will be transactional. He never does a thing in his life without wanting something in return.
Love
It’s complicated. He loves your love. He loves the attention and adoration. He craves it. But again, you are a tool for him to get that love. He has no problems molding and shaping you into what he wants, because it can always be better. Look at the House of Hope: everything he owns is shaped in his own image and for his specific needs, and you will be too. Unconditional love is not a part of his vocabulary.
Obsession and dogs and cars
Raphael is just like his daddy when it comes to obsession. It’s hyperfixation. He will get obsessed with someone who gives him the adoration he thinks he deserves, and he will want every bit of it that he can squeeze out of you. He will lose himself completely in it. But. He ‘likes when people put up a fight’ and he likes puzzles, like Korrilla says. You are a puzzle to him. Once you have endured all his excruciating tests with flying colors and he has molded, broken, and shaped you into what he wants, the puzzle is over and things start to get boring. You start to get boring, and Raphael is not a man who lets himself be bored. It is like a dog chasing a car.
(Thank you for the ask <3)
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farmergirldulce · 3 days
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Farmer Confessions Part 1
Here's a scenario: How would our romanceables react to us, the farmer, confessing our love for them? (,,>ヮ<,,)
Part 1: The Bachelorettes
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♡ 𝒜𝒹𝑒𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑒
It takes quite a bit to get Adeline alone for you to talk to her because this lady is always so busy
Like?? Girl your budget portfolio can wait LOL
You send her a letter about a "potential project" you wanted to discuss with her and was able to fit yourself in her schedule for that week (okay technically a lie but you had to)
When you get to her office, as soon as she puts out the tea cakes and opens up the manilla folders on her desk you just cut to the chase
"Adeline, I like you! In a more-than-a-friend kind of way!"
She drops her pen, stunned
Her cheeks turn as pink as her hair as she's trying to process what you just said. You? Like her? What did she do to deserve this?
She finally manages to shyly respond, tucking her hair behind her ear:
"Farmer I... I like you as well. Thank you so much for telling me."
She also insists she won't let work get in the way of her relationship with you and she'll always make time for you. You also always offer to help her with work so you two can spend more free time together.
(btw she was lowkey pouting there was never a "project" you wanted to discuss but she forgave you; don't worry lol)
⋆。‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧。⋆
♡ 𝓒𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓮
You decide to tell her on one of the days she invites you over for tea
You take a few days to gather her favorite flowers to create a beautiful bouquet you hope she'll love
You knock on the door and she opens it to see the bouquet of flowers completely covering your blush adorned face
"Oh my, what's all this? For me? How beautiful~!"
She's floored with the sweet gesture and your nerves dissipate a bit
After she brews the tea and sets it down in front of you, she asks what the occasion is for the bouquet
Ho boy the nerves are coming back
You don't know what you'd do if Celine didn't return your feelings
You manage to croak out your confession, peeking though one eye to see her reaction
Her face is flushed, her index fingers touching each other as she says:
"Hehe... you beat me to it. I invited you over to tell you my feelings for you!"
You both share a sweet embrace, enjoying each others company for the rest of the day
You both become the sweetest couple in Mistria. Everyone wants what you two have!
⋆。‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧。⋆
♡ 𝓡𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓪
You two are besties so all the more difficult to profess your love without making things awkward
You've been practicing in your head all week on how to tell her without scaring her off as well as praying she returns your feelings
A perfect opportunity lands on your lap when Reina asks for your help taste testing a soup recipe she's been working on
Dressed your cutest, you head to the inn
She looks as prettier as ever when she greets you
Get it together Farmer
As the private tasting session goes on, you give her feedback what you think would be better (a little more pepper, cut back on the acidity, etc) and out of nowhere, before the conversation of culinary consultation can continue she giggles lightly and says:
"Wouldn't it be crazy if we like, started dating? We have so much in common anyways!"
You freeze at what she just says and she gasps, covering her mouth and cheeks turning red
"W-WAIT I meant like hypothetically because we both are good cooks and-"
"Nah, that's not crazy at all. In fact, let's go out!"
You're both shocked at how easy that was and just stand there like dummies, accepting each others feelings
You can feel Josephine and Hemlock behind you two with a thumbs up of approval as you squeeze Reina's hand
You're lucky to have a bestie AND girlfriend in Reina
⋆。‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧。⋆
♡ 𝒱𝒶𝓁𝑒𝓃
Yep; you've done it now
You've fallen for the town's doctor
You've tried so hard to put your feelings on the backburner simply because you think she's way over your league and Juniper would never let you live it down once she finds out you were rejected by Valen (oh ho ho ho ho!)
But my god; that doctor is beautiful and you had to tell her you love her or else you'd go mad
As your lovesick thoughts take over on how you'd woo Valen, you forget you're in the mines rn and one of those rock bastards make you trip and smack your head on the mine floor
You shed a tear as you pass out, regretting not being able to tell the hot doc how you feel (rip bozo)
You slowly open your eyes to see Valen over you with a light behind her
"My angel... am I dead?"
But no; you're just at the clinic and Valen is there tending to your injuries
"My, you've had quite the injury. You need to be more careful, (Y/N)."
She tells you you had a concussion and you should stay away from the mines until you're better
After a few hours of monitoring you, she discharges you and lets you go home and write to her if anything
Write? BINGO
You definitely write her, but not to whine about your injuries, but tell her exactly how she makes you feel
After a few days of silence, as you start to worry, she one day pops up on your farm with the letter in her hands, a slight blush on her face
"A love letter, hm? How cute... why don't we chat about what's happening here?"
You don't hesitate to let her inside your house to talk things further
You two will most definitely take things slow, but nonetheless you two will take care of each other and blossom this relationship to something beautiful
⋆。‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧。⋆
♡ 𝒥𝓊𝓃𝒾𝓅𝑒𝓇
You almost didn't want to have these feelings for this Mean Girl ₜₘ
But goddammit you wanted the hot witch lady whether you liked it or not
When you receive yet another invite to be her guinea pig you take this as an opportunity to get your feelings out of the way
You reluctantly arrive at the bathhouse to see the lady of your dreams looking as attractive as she ever has
Did she already give you some kind of potion? Under some kind of spell?
After you give the good boi Doozy well-deserved pets, you give yourself up to Juniper as she performs all kinds of experiments
You turn into a variety of things until you're a frog, in which she has trouble changing you back
"I dunno, (Y/N). This is a great look for you! Ohohohoho~!"
Before you get pissed at her, you recall a certain fairy tale and smirk.
"Doesn't a kiss from a beautiful princess turn me back?"
She nearly chokes
"A-A PRINCESS?! How dare-"
You both turn to see Doozy bark and point his paw to a page in the spell book and sure enough, a kiss in fact DOES reverse it
Yep; Doozy the Wingman LOL
She groans and gives in, kissing your froggy head, and you turn back to normal
"There. Satisfied?"
"I dunno~ Maybe the spell didn't work~"
"You little-"
You silence her with a quick peck on the cheek and dart out of the bathhouse, leaving a baffled and blushing mess out of Juniper
Not a confession per-se, but you got her thinking about you and craving more.
Once you finally tell her though, I'm sure she might warm up to you by then
(well maybe lol)
Next: Part 2 with the bachelors!
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hyruviandoctor · 9 months
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So far I've gotten a huge raise and got approved for my first solo apartment so yeah I guess 2024 might actually be my year
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luck-of-the-drawings · 6 months
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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goldkirk · 7 months
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I opened Pinterest for the first time in months.
That made me realize a lot about how bad I was actually doing and how much of a Waffle House Index use of Pinterest is for adult me, apparently.
I hadn’t realized it had grown that foundational to me in a healthy-brain-exercise-and-hobby-joy way. Nice to know moving forward! It’s another sign I can keep track of and use to spot correlation/indicator patterns earlier my behavior.
I love this kind of thing, it makes me so excited!
#personal data hacking is my passion#someday I’ll tell a story about the most notable times I tracked things or hacked my own mental processes from childhood to now#including the fear of spiders and bed wetting and behavior changes and posture and heart rate and cursive and putting kitchen items and#trash away as soon as I’m finished using them instead of never ever or ages and ages later#I’m so proud of that#you have to give it time and still commit. chaining thoughts and routines and behaviors really works#we are not separate brains and bodies and external environments#anyway I’m gonna go haha I used up he last of my energy burst on Discord and here and I need to go rest and lie on the floor and probly doze#love you all be back soon bye mwah!#add to journal#trauma evolution#my Waffle House index#this is going to be a fun new tag I’m so going to have fun with this and I bet it’ll be a helpful example reference for other people too#more than just for future me!#so excited so proud of myself so happy so grateful for hope about me really trusting that my ability and my behavior and my performance#are able to and going to yes keep getting better#long many-milestone path-journeys of potential#like when I was a little 6-7 year old kid-team athlete looking ahead at a concept of a future with me over time getting#stronger and cleverer and faster and slicker and calmer and even happier and more and more capable and able to accomplish!#a gift. all this time I didn’t think I’d have and have been living anyway is such a gift.#knowing that I truly have future time to grow and explore and change and improve in even though I still can’t FEEL or IMAGINE that future#time yet. also a gift.#the time I will one day realize I can imagine a future and imagine myself alive? will be a gift.#breath is a gift. experiencing life is a gift. other life is a gift. rhythm is a gift. motion is a gift. awake is a gift. color is a gift.#such a great expanse. all of it new. all of it eternal. all of it me. all of it nothing I’ve ever known before. all of it all of it#all of it. gifts.#gonna go have floor time now. this would be such a nice time to re-re-regain my ability to cry!#mwah I love you future me. take care of your hand and thank u for writing all this down 💛#hey little star whatcha gonna queue?#my poetry
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tamagotchikgs · 3 months
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sadness n agonies r getting me tonight lads it feels like theres a big knot inside me getting bigger n tighter at the same time n it hurts so much i have no idea what to do but Stand here. i can even sit im too restless im just standing and trying not to cry
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southernvampire · 1 year
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uterus has been yeeterused
#so i had a hysterectomy about two weeks ago and it's insane how much better i feel not only physically but mentally#i havent felt this in tune with my body since i was a kid#i finally feel like im on the path to how i want my body to be like and i never understood just how much i was affected by#both gender dysphoria and physical disease (endometriosis) until i got almost everything removed in there#im solidly sure im nonbinary now instead of having conflicting feelings about it#i feel much better about expressing my strange femininity and being perceived as feminine#i feel more spiritual too?? idk how to describe it#im just confused a little about why this had such a big impact on me since yeah it did give me dysphoria to a degree but i didnt think it#was THAT bad#i feel more in tune with my child self; like i feel like a grown up version of my 9 year old self and more confident#my mind is much calmer and i just feel so present and one with my body. i finally feel like i could meditate comfortably withouf wanting to#escape my mind or body?? idk idk it's so so weird#anyway im also in much less pain despite not being able to do much of anything and still healing from surgery#and i know that having this done isnt a cure but god i hope i get lucky and that the endo doesnt come back anyway#it's amazing to be able to love my body instead of being mad at it because it causes me pain and does things that i dont want it to#idk if that's a fully healthy mindset or not but that#that's what's been going on in my life so far
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the-kipsabian · 1 year
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in three weeks this time i'll be on a plane again
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medicinemane · 7 months
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As always, if you wonder why I don't talk about certain current events but do others, a lot of it comes down to whether I think it's something that other people are talking about a lot
If it's something where I figure you're going to be well informed and need a break, I tend to keep it to a minimum on here cause you already know
If it's something I rarely see talked about, then I'm more likely to mention it
World's bad, we're all doing what we can, I know people have said to me before they appreciate me more keeping to cats and frogs and random stuff, so I mostly try to do that, but... in the end I just kinda share whatever my brain decides to share
Want to give my thought process though
#and in this case it's a matter of that Syria really does feel forgotten and I won't deny I often forget too#but with the stuff that's going on right now I really prefer to when I can be reblogging stuff that has something at least a bit actionable#stuff that says where you can donate to give aid via reputable sources... that's what I like to try and focus on#but yeah... man; only place I really ever tend to see Syria mentioned is in Ukrainian circles#so that's why I wanted to highlight that one#man I wish I could do more in the world#so many people suffering and... and... well; and I can't do shit about it and that sucks#just keep trying to slowly get things together around here; and trying to slowly be able to help more and more people#and just hope that if you help people; it'll make them want to help people like they were helped#and maybe if enough of us get stable ground under our feet and know how it was to be helped... maybe some day we can collectively help enou#...try to avoid making things feel hopeless with my posts; cause things certainly feel hopeless#so I try to... try to focus on the good and what can be done to fix things as much as possible#want to keep people in the fight to try and make things better; not drain them by posting nothing but the bleakness of the world#things will never be right; those who've died can't be saved and we've failed them forever#which is all the more reason we can't give up and have to keep trying to make things better#because if we can never make things right; then the least we can do is try and make things better in the future#to at least stop adding to the list of people we'll never be able to fix things for#...something like that#it's bleak and I'm depressive anyway; but show must go on; you know?#so that's my thoughts here#I just feel the need to explain it sometimes; because people have a way of making assumptions#that if you don't talk about something you don't care#no... that's not it; I care; I just don't want to burn people out#and you can say they shouldn't burn out but I try to deal in practicalities and descriptivism; and people can be burned out#rather keep them in the fight to make the world better#so if there's a situation... like the George Floyd protests; that was another one where I didn't post much on it#cause we all knew... we all were paying attention and... I just figured people needed space#...I'm sad... sad more police reforms and accountability couldn't get pushed though but... at least we got something#...and I'm not gonna act like I'm some front line fighter when it comes to justice#I barely can deal with my own shit; I'm not saying I'm worth a damn thing in any cause
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nixtorr · 1 year
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eight and liv but they enable eachother’s murderous tendancies instead of their actual dynamic
#eighth doctor#liv chenka#eight and liv but eight is the same eight who would have killed davros gladly if they were the only victims in terror firma#eight and liv but eight takes more traits from caerdroia’s the nasty one#eight and liv but eight resembles the eight who was like ‘give me the code and i shant break your arm’#gets the code and whomps the guy’s head against a wall in vanishing point#eight and liv but eights character actually makes sense to be like that after de1#im sorry but eight is rarely an optimist. he is however a hopeful realist#‘despair accords with reality but i insist on hope’ and such#he KNOWS the universe is full of evil but#his hope never stops him from doing horrible things. like killing the clock faced people in anachrophobia#in de1 he is faced with his despair after the death of lucie in the face of ww1 and the daleks and the fake reality made to please him#and when he thought molly had died when she fell. he still had hope. he still climbed back up. but he was still ready to jump back down#with the risk of death#he was going to go to the end of the universe to look for hope. he hurt the tardis and himself for it.#thats all good. thats sexy. but why after all that is he so horribly an optimist#why does he believe that the eleven can change after he's been like that since his second incarnation. lumps of rock evolving into flowers#the only nice incarnation of his being the eight but he was like that since he was born and he was obviously struggling#why does he treat dickbag landlord from better watch out like he has any empathy in him before hes literally dragged to hell#anyway. bitchier eight and bitchier liv i think theyd be great together#actually. the amount of bitch liv is is great already
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urbanbirdbud · 2 years
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it’s been. a very rough afternoon
#fun to know that even while in the midst of my worst disassociative episode in the past year I can still cobble together a good meme#anyways um. about to tear down literally everything I ever derives joy from in my room and put into storage and never speak more than needed#to my dad. I am. so so tired. every time I think things are looking up and I can relax in my own home something has to happen#and then I need to slowly rebuild any safety I felt beforehand. I hate knowing my stuff was looked through and I dont know to what extent#anyways yeah. yearly deeply oversharing personal post over. gonna go hide literally half of my mortal possessions in a box somewhere#personal#no rblogging etc etc#edit: having another breakdown bear w me#I’ve scraped myself down to nothing for peace in my family I grovel and shut up and bear it fucking all and even then#they have the fucking audacity to ask me more? to put away the few reminders I have of people who love me things I enjoy#and the friendships Ive held onto like a dying man does to water?#they say they care about my mental health and how the devil affects everyone insidiously. I think they should take a long deep look#in the fucking mirror. open their eyes to how fucking close I was to just. giving up while I was suffocating under the veil of religion#and no before anyone asks I’m not gonna do anything stupid. I’m not one to live for spite but I trudge on hoping to get somewhere better.#just gonna have a short cry before bottling it up and dealing w it ten yrs down the road. not gonna go thru another ‘check in’ to lose more#oops forgot my little tag ->#ubb chirps
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tiredsadpeach · 2 years
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I think we’re at a stalemate after that text which tbh is better than I tweet and then he tweets about being annoyed
#and me and Lucy chatted when she fronted :) I was wrong about her age it’s 13#for those not caught up she is said friend’s alter (one of many) and I think she’s the second youngest? I’m bad about forgetting their ages#I have work tomorrow so honestly I hope things are chill but then again work is now a good distraction#even if I have weird ass nightmares about it#it was so strange y’all like I was being held hostage to work there?? which doesn’t reflect how I feel about that place at all idk#anyway in happy news it’s me and my bf’s 2 months c:#he’s been busy setting up a Pokémon gym circuit hehe I’m learning more about competitive battling so I can be a challenger!!#there’s a gym leader for each type and then the elite four and a champion! he’s the ice gym leader c:#his team is really good hehe and I’m getting better! idk if I can beat his team for a while but I’ve gotten him down to 2 before so >:)#it’s very fun but he’s balancing that on top of college so I just hope he doesn’t get too stressed#he’s been having welding classes hehe I keep forgetting the exact name of his major but it’s a type of engineering I’m pretty sure#my memory is so weird man some things just never stick#anyway just wanted to give a last update of the day for those who are following this#I wonder if I’ll still be him and his bf’s friend in a weeks time lol#but yeah I sleep now thank you to everyone who has been sending their input it really means a lot#because it’s always hard for me to tell if I’m ever actually justified in my feelings ever since some real shitty ex friends#which this year will be six years free of them!!#hope everyone who sees this gets some great rest and has a great day/night
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hexastitchimera · 4 months
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Genuine observation, no sass and no disrespect, but being someone who is chronically OFFline & an active volunteer/activist for over a decade, and seeing what people say is "crucial discourse" online is... Quite the trip, honestly.
#vee vibrates#I understand that some things are more important to others than they are to me but.#I really need people to understand that sometimes you're better off volunteering at a shelter of ANY kind if you want to commit real change.#Online advocacy is crucial but man am I worried as hell for the kids that don't seem to understand that offline is even moreso.#And being disabled + queer myself I know that it can (and often is) a safety and accessibility issue but zoouniverse.org exists.#That website where you solve history and math quizzes to give rice to impovrished families is online.#Just. Anything that puts this aggressive “”advocacy“” to rest. Ego will be the death of us and we don't need anymore of it.#And if anybody reads this and finds themselves getting upset ask yourself this: Why does this upset me? Do I see myself in this?#Because you'd know that I am speaking out of genuine desperation when I say all of this.#I am not any better than any online activist just because I do a lot of work offline.#I am just so fucking tired of seeing people misdirect their rightful frustrations and fall further prey to the elites' divisive desires.#Is it so much to ask of you all to finally be angry at those who truly make our lives miserable? Or are we just going to keep playing cop?#At the end of the day it's your choice. I cannot force you. However you will grow old one day and look back. Remember that.#I for one don't want to have any regrets about any time I wasted on bigots and trolls and people who have already decided on their opinions.#I want to look back and be grateful for the opportunity to help so many people as many helped me in my direst times of need.#I think that's the difference here. A lot of online folk didn't go through the poverty & severe abuse & bigotry I faced since I was born.#I went through hell and came out kinder in the end because I was at the end of the proverbial whip myself at several points before 16.#But trauma doesn't make you compassionate. You choose to be. And I choose to never repeat the cycle.#The day I do is the day I've lost both my mind and my spirit. I will never repeat my family's & abusers' horrific mistakes.#I will be kinder to a world that needs kindness now more than ever. Even if I scream my throat out forever doing so.#I don't need a voice to be heard.#Anyways sorry. I woke up on the desparate side of the bed. Thank you to all who fight the good fight.#Despite everything I've said I have so much more faith and hope now more than ever. We will prevail.#And thank you if you read all of these tags?? Safety love and solidarity to you you're the MVP. ;_; 💜
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slimeylee · 6 months
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why have these last years fucking sucked ass
#slimey-vents#trigger warning below hi did you drink water today and eat something i hope u did ur so cool and amazing pls get some rest gives u a cookie#please scroll past if uninterested i also dont want u to feel obligated like u have to read n listen to me vent and ramble on abt dumb shit#like 2020 - 2024 . have just been ass .#we're not even halfway into 2024 and it already is just#garbage . like its fucking horrible#i dont see how this year could get . any worse ?? but i wouldnt want to get my hopes up on that itll get better ?#like god what has been happening .#covid came up technoblade got cancer and passed away israel's continuing their mass genocide#and a lot of things have happened in my personal life . such as my mother passing away .#and . its just been so fucking hard ??#i wish i had lasting hope in humanity . but tbh i dont think its ever gonna get any better and that really fucks w me#ive been having suicidal thoughts and ive just been in a very shitty mental state recently#like social media#is honestly the only thing i have to live on#i have honestly boring friends n all my friends dont go to my school . my gf doesnt even go to my school#ive had to switch schools after having a fun time and doing a lot better . the only thing that im holding on by a thread to is social media#all my friends . my fandoms . etc . i talk to through my phone and through here#im so glad to have met everybody that i have on here#im sorry this is getting really long ive started going on a ramble but i just want everyone to know that i love yall /p#i appreciate everybody so much . all my moots and my close friends that ive made not only here but irl as well#and everybody that ive talked to throughout the time we've known each other . i really just want to think that everything will get better#everybody that ive met through my years of social media and school have really changed my life . and idk what i wouldve done#having never met any of them . especially my moots on here that ive grown close to#its just been stressful . but ive strived to get through it all . despite how hard it is#and how desperately i just want to let go from everything#but ending one thing doesnt end any pain it just gives it on to someone else#and i know that im way too pussy to end anything anyways .#but on another note .#please remember that you are amazing . talented . strong . and i appreciate and ily so much . /p
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