#anyway this isn't the time loop fic that's a different one

[finifugue]

One day I will not write stupidly complicated AUs for racecar drivers. Meanwhile, have a snippet of an AU where the Gang r scientists who discover that the centre of the earth is actually a black hole and it's actually a big fat metaphor for divorce.

“Disaster parameters?” Oscar asks, a little weak. George sucks in a breath through his teeth. “Thirteen percent chance that half the ship’s particles will tunnel, leaving the other half irreparably entangled with the atoms of the earth itself, which ‒ well, it won’t be painful, not for very long, anyway. There’s a six percent chance the entangled particles will tunnel with themselves, at which point we’re not… quite sure what will happen, but we think it’ll be a quick death as well. Then there’s a point-two percent chance that the accelerator will entangle every particle inside the ship, instead of the layer on the outside…” Charles finishes the sentence for him. “Which will turn all of us into walking, speaking atomic bombs. Possibly immortal. We only were able to test it theoretically.” He waves a hand. Oscar tries to explode his head with his mind.

[covetyou]

in honour of the Pedro Party, I sent @goodwithcheese this ask about who would get pantsless first and who stays pantsed until the end of the party. between that, and a particular thought about party hats (and Mr. Pedro "I hate belts" Pascal), I thought it was a good idea for Dieter and his PA to make an appearance at this party. enjoy!

do it like Madonna

ao3 ⋆ main masterlist ⋆ series masterlist

pairing: Dieter Bravo & gn!reader rating: Mature (18+ only!) warnings: no smut. nudity. mention of Dieter Bravo's dick and balls. drug and alcohol use/refrence, improper use of party hats. cameos from Javi G, Oberyn, and Santos (all the P-Boys are there!) word count: 801 summary: Being Dieter Bravo's plus one to a party isn't always all it's cracked up to be, and sometimes, just sometimes, it puts a smile on your face anyway.

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It all starts when Dieter Bravo walks into the party with you, his long suffering assistant. He'd been grumbling the whole ride here about how uncomfortable he was, and he hadn't stopped now that you'd stepped through the door and said hello to a few people before making your way to the empty kitchen to grab drinks.

You barely have a drink in hand when an all too familiar jingle reaches your ears and, like every time before it, you whip around to see Dieter standing there, fiddling with his belt buckle and fighting it through the loops of his pants.

"Dee, what are you doing?"

"What does it look like?" he grumbles.

"This is a nice party, you can't go taking shit off. It's not that kind of party."

"I know, but you made me wear a belt. I fuckin' hate belts."

"Because your pants were falling down, Dee."

"So," he grumbles again, only just managing to whip the belt off before you can grab him, slapping it down on the counter not a second later before double fisting two drinks and leaving you stood there in the kitchen staring after him.

His pants are already sagging at the ass by the time he walks out onto the patio, his arms spread wide, drinks sloshing over onto the slab below, as people wrap themselves around him in warm greeting, before sipping from one cup and then the other.

Your own drink will have to wait. You have a belt to put back in the car and a menace of a man to keep an eye on for the rest of the night.

Except, he's nowhere to be seen when you get back inside from stashing his belt. You check the pool and just about every room, but you have a sneaking suspicion he's intentionally avoiding you.

It's a suspicion that's confirmed when you find his shoes and pants hidden in the corner of the office.

Even moreso when you find his shirt tucked behind a sofa cushion.

Dread runs through you at the thought of all the NDAs you'll have to get signed when you find his boxer shorts in the punch bowl, fishing them out only to throw them - still fruity - onto the pile of Dieter's clothes in the back of your car.

And then, twenty minutes later, you see him.

Completely naked, obviously.

Kind of.

It is a party after all.

And what's a party without party hats. It seems Dieter doesn't think it'd be much of a party at all, because he's wearing four. One is exactly where you'd expect it - directly on top of his head with the elastic pinching under his chin.

From there, it just gets worse the further down his body you look.

He has two hats strapped to his chest, each pointing a different direction even has he tries to reposition them over his nipples. And the fourth hat... well, he's somehow managed to stuff his cock and balls into the cone of the fourth hat, because at the very least you can't see anything hanging out or dangling in the sight of anyone who shouldn't be seeing it.

It's miraculous really. Even in his nudity, he's somehow managed to be modest about it.

He's grinning at you as you approach him, that giddy, too happy, look on his face that he always gives you when he's too drunk or high to care about actively pissing you off.

"Do I look like Madonna," he slurs, sticking out his pointy chest.

"Dieter, why are you wearing four party hats and not your clothes," you ask, hoping against hope the people coming out of the house haven't seen him and you can tidy this all up before they start to stare.

"Five."

"What?"

"Five party hats," he says, giving you a twirl. There you see the fifth hat, strapped against his ass with the thin elastic, looking exactly like a-

"It's a tail," he says with a giggle. "I have a tail."

And with a dozy smile his gaze trails off and lights up just as a very stoned, but very beautiful, Spaniard comes walking out of the house in his own set of party hats, followed by a man wearing nothing at all, eating from a plate of berries, and another in the tiniest, tightest Speedo you've ever seen. And, beyond that, you see a few more bare asses, and even more bare chests inside, mingling with fully clothed bodies that don't seem to care too much that your employer is comparing party hat sizes with his new friend.

You'll allow it this time, you suppose, taking a tepid sip of the same drink you've been nursing for hours, watching Dieter run off back inside, his party hat tail shaking with every jiggle of his ass. tagging my Pedro Party pals - who do you think would be pantsed vs. pantless? @ghotifishreads @sp00kymulderr @missredherring @ozarkthedog @perotovar

@undercoverpena @schnarfer @secretelephanttattoo @hellfire-state-of-mind @readingiskeepingmegoing

[atelierlili]

It's time take you back to the past

to play the shitty games that suck ass.

Some besties wanted a list of Everlark fics recs where Katniss and/or Peeta are blasted to the past/alternate universe to relive the events of the games to fix it, so here we are!

Time Is Never Found Again...Or Is It? (113,000 + words) by blahblahblah1703

Katniss, after talking to Snow in his rose garden, finds herself somehow back in her childhood home. She has seven months until she enters the arena for the 74th annual Hunger Games, along with the love of her life, who when she last saw him, was still struggling not to kill her, just perfect.

The pre-game everlark that happens here is ����. This is part one of a larger series. The sequel (which is wonderful as well) can be found here. This is the series that got me into this rabbit hole.

Afterburn ( 104,000+ words) by BlueMaple

Katniss Everdeen-Mellark goes to the woods surrounding New Appalachia, a.k.a the former District Twelve, on the morning of the fiftieth anniversary of the final Reaping of the Hunger Games. There, she is literally waylaid by her own past, and wakes in the past, six weeks before Primrose was first Reaped. Alone, grieving, terrified, and without a clue on how she got there (and then), she realizes that it will be impossible for her- on every level- to simply live through events as they transpired in her personal future. With no way to return her to that future, she is nevertheless determined to get back to her own party - hopefully with a lot less damage and fewer crucial casualties along the way.

This is apart of the All Sorrows Less series, which is still being updated. It's filled with wonderful side characters, mindblowing twists, a baby I will kill people for and GILF Katniss, what more can I say?

Second Burn ( 127,000+ words) by carnationhes

Katniss wonders if things could be different if she got a second chance. And then she gets one. This morning she wakes up back in District 12 after Peeta's warning of the bombing on Thirteen.

Have you read Second burn? Why haven't you read it yet? You should read it. It's amazing. Literally makes my brain chemistry tingle. I think this is most accurate depiction of a Katniss being blasted to the past with no meta explanation why. It's sooo soo soo good. I'm on my knees please read it and please read the sequel Ignite as well. This series is so underated please.

over and over (lost again) (13,000+ words) by TeaBrigadier

I died in the Hunger Games. It isn’t even the first time it’s happened. I’ve died in the Hunger Games five times now

This is a very self contained time loop where Katniss continuously relieves the first games until she gets it right. I know it doesn't really fit the theme, but this one makes my feel happy feelings and i wanted to recommend something that's isn't so long so I'm adding it anyway. Deathloops are fun!

Ongoing:

Catching sparks (19k words) (Last update 26 Feb 2024) by Silver_Cleo

The time when 23 year old Katniss and Peeta get transported from their home in what had once been Victor's Village of District 12, and into the bodies of their much younger selves, who have just woken up from exiting the arena of the 74th Hunger Games.

Here Katniss and Peeta get traveled to the past to the point where they just win their games. It's a great WIP. I love Everlark working together and being cute + humanizing the 74th tributes and their family <3

I'm probably missing a few, but these are my favourite ones so far. As much as I love the trope, I know it's a monster to take on from a writing standpoint so props to the writers!

I hope you enjoy them <3 There's nothing I love more than shining a light on amazing fics new and old. If you have recs of your own, please send them my way. I love this trope so much haha

@bbrooklynbabe @nightlocked-in @waywardangel-wilds

[terephin]

Howdy! I'm Flowey, Flowey the flower!

Anyways, I'm gonna ramble now. Introduction segment done.

So, Homura right? Homuhomu, Homegirl herself. She's a deeply broken girl.

I'm gonna talk about what I believe to be some of the why's, beyond just the looping itself.

Now, other than Madoka (A topic for an entirely different rant, honestly) and maybe Oriko (I mean, *gestures vaguely* look at the bitch, she's good at her job (Traumatizing Homosexuals)) I'd say a certain girl has hurt Homura more than anyone else.

Who?

Miki Sayaka. (Though you could argue Mami too) Now some might think this has to do with the general fragility of her mental state, but her witching out isn't what I'd say is the focus. It's the distrust.

Sayaka, despite how i usually see it passed over, was in the end one of Homura's first friends (Excluding maybe one or two people from before her surgery, but we haven't seen much implying Homu ever had friends before Madoka picked her up like a stray cat). Sayaka was, and is, someone who's opinion Homura values quite a bit, and her opinion of Homu herself hasn't exactly been good through much of the loops.

And here, I'd like to argue that this is a rather core hurt, part of turning Homura into who and what she is now. That rejection from someone who she knew as among the first to accept her, from one of her first friends.

Imagine, for a moment, the pain each time she was called evil, a monster, by that upbeat girl who was so strong and so brave. The girl that, if you ask me, looking back at Homu with the golfclub, she tried to model herself after.

It really is something I've seen quite a few fics forget, that Homura and Sayaka were friends in the beginning, that in the mind of the broken girl who doomed herself to never grow up they still are. (Sidenote : I've considered writing a snippet of Homura and Sayaka set in the Homurinth, or maybe in that world she made after her apotheosis, have them talk and have Sayaka mention that she came with in part to apologise, for all the hurtful words she'd spoken.)

Miki Sayaka is a brave, headstrong yet fragile girl, one that you can't help but admire, and I believe that Akemi Homura was swept up in that wave too. That, though they've both respectively forgotten and repressed the fact, Sayaka was an idol in the mind of that lost, lonely girl, a Hero amongst those who saved her. And perhaps that, too, is why Homura despises Sayaka's ambition to be such.

[lovelyhan]

what are your svt fic recs??? like your holy grail??

took me a while to put this together BUT here it is!

disclaimer that i've been a carat for like . a month so it's a stretch to say i've read a lot of svt content. tho from what i've consumed so far, my favorites are listed under the cut :>

i'll start with the ones i found on ao3 first hehe

push it down (sooner or later it all comes out) by dontflailmenow × tags: s.coups x reader; camboy!cheol, enemies to lovers

the first EVER svt fic i've read, and it was just so WOW!!!! basically, reader recently broke up w her ex, which is seungcheol's best friend. cheol and mc aren't on the best of terms (always arguing etc.) so when she realizes that the camboy she's been lusting over to get over her ex turns out to be cheol, some...problems start to arise i'm pretty sure i saw this one around tumblr but i'm too lazy to find the op's blog i'm so sorry HEUUUHEU but i really loved it to pieces, and it ultimately flung me into svt fanfic tumblr altogether :D

The bore next door by HoneyAteez × tags: wonwoo x reader; blind dates, suffocation via cock LOL

another fic that i am fairly sure is cross-posted on tumblr too, but can't be assed to find -- your mother sets you up with good neighbor jeon wonwoo, and he turns out to be the worst sexual deviant on the face of the earth, fucking the soul out of your body right after the first date.

Walking in Traffic by versigny × tags: mingyu x reader; soulmate au, teens being teens

literally crying as i type this because it's one of the most beautiful coming of age stories i've ever read, and it was written back when i was still in mf HIGH SCHOOL 😭 reader and gyu find out they're soulmates way too early, and pretty much despise each other growing up, but they eventually come to terms with their soul bond along the line.

close proximity by chilligyu × tags: mingyu x reader; roommates, LOTS OF ANGST

there's no explicit smut in this one, but the plot twists and the narration itself threw me in for SUCH a goddamn loop that it would be a hate crime not to include this here. mingyu becomes reader's roommate upon bff!wonwoo's recommendation, and they and up falling for each other, and [gets dragged off stage because spoilers]

now for the tumblr recs!

sapiosexual by @smileysuh × tags: s.coups x reader; sugar daddy au, psych daddy!cheol,,,,

it's a pretty straightforward sugar daddy au, but what makes it different is how it's written, y'know? cheol clearly lays all of the details for he and reader to agree on, making sure all the boundaries are clear and there aren't any blurred lines. seungkwan as your best friend is also a really enjoyable addition (he's the one who coined the term psych daddy LOL), AND i just love the author's humor in general.... quirofilia [bursts out laughing]

A Break by @smileysuh (again bc i'm obsessed w their work) × tags: mingyu x reader x wonwoo; svt as babysitters, budding poly

so op has an entire assortment of meanie poly fics, but this one is probably my most favorite bc it touches on a more endearing and responsible side to mingyu :') he and reader just can't sit down and fuck because he's busy worrying about their child every ten minutes LOL. enter jeon wonwoo, who is not only baby saebyeok's favorite uncle, but has been pining for the reader since time immemorial. of course, gyu has known all along, and asks them if they're both down to have a threesome (this is literally a terrible way to summarize the story, but i suggest you just read it &lt;3) OH OH bonus: hoshi tries to sacrifice the baby to the tiger gods in a summoning circle made of tiger plushies. if that doesn't sell this fic for you, i don't know WHAT will

Love, Actually by @haet-sal × tags: jun x reader; cheating but not really? whipped single dad!jun

aka the fic that catalyzed my jun brain damage. reader works as jun's secretary but she isn't very...good at her job, but he keeps her around anyway bc 1.) his kid likes her, and 2.) HE likes her. problem is: she has a boyfriend-not-boyfriend, but Because that boyfriend-not-boyfriend is an asshole, she kind of uses jun as a constant rebound, poor guy (it has a happy ending tho i promise!!)

an untitled dk friends 2 lovers by @husbandhoshi × tags: dk x reader; idiots in love

this is actually preceded by 2 more drabbles from the op, but i'm linking this one specifically bc it made me physically long for big dick boyfriend lee seokmin. the thing i like most about smut written for dk is that he's ALWAYS so fun and endearing and lovable in bed, and what's more is that this one's a friend to lovers fic, so there's YEARS worth of pining and puppy love to spice up the sex hehehehehehe it really really deserves more recognition !!

right where you left me by @tonicandjins × tags: wonwoo x reader; exes getting back together, ANGST

i have a shitty memory so i can't go into the specifics on what this fic is about. it's one of the first ones i read on tumblr, but it's been a hot minute but i DO remember writhing in bed right after reading it, so it definitely earns a spot on the rec list! reader and wonwoo lived together in their hometown, but had to break up when wonwoo moves to seoul and he just couldn't make any compromises. bonus points for best friend hoshi on this one &lt;;3

that's pretty much it for now! i'm so sorry if any of the authors mentioned didn't want to be tagged 🤒🤒 i just thought i'd share my thoughts abt ur work while sharing them w the rest of my followers UEUEUEUE

[aziraphales-library]

Hey! So I just read a Tumblr post about a costumer always going to this one coffee shop and asking for the most disgusting thing ever and NEVER drinking it (and one time they took a sip, they said yuck). And it got me thinking. Do you have any fics here about A or C doing something once as a joke or whatever and then it scaling and they can't back out now, but like, humorous? Could be this sort of setting, could be any other setting. The only tags I can come up with for similar things is the fake dating/married, but I'm pretty sure I've already read most of what's there and I want something different to that anyway. Hell, it doesn't even need to be A and/or Z who are stuck in that situation. I just really wanna read more stuff like this.

Hi! There isn't a specific tag for this kind of fic, really. But you might find similar fics to enjoy on our #misunderstandings tags. And here are some fics I think fit the idea you're describing...

Would you like to get a drink? by AppleSeeds (G)

Crowley has been drooling over the handsome checkout operator in his local supermarket for months and finally summons the courage to approach him. Unfortunately, it doesn't take long for Crowley's brain to shut down completely.

Calling All Catchers by Quefish (E)

Crowley is horny and puts out a personal ad, Aziraphale knocks on the door.

Ways to Make You Smile by WickedWriter (M)

Crowley has always been awkward around anyone who he develops feelings for. While Aziraphale is always nice to him, he can't help but screw things up when trying to flirt. But when he starts making latte art to impress his angel, it was only a matter of time before he found a way to cock things up again. Rated M for adult themed jokes and puns

Sansevieria by KissMyAsthma & leukozyna (M)

Crowley is on the prowl for a rare plant. Unwilling to pay such a high price, he takes a stroll to the plant shop to look for an alternative... then meeting a handsome stranger who happens to own the plant of his dreams. How far will Crowley go to seize a cutting of this botanical masterpiece? Or: when you want to get a cutting of a rare, expensive plant, what do you do? You slither your way into the pants of its owner (too bad if you fall in love on the way)

Thrown for a Loop by MickyRC (T)

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a man in possession of a large amount of yarn will be assumed to be a knitter. It is a truth universally acknowledged among crocheters that this is annoying as hell. In his many years crocheting, Aziraphale has never been one to let that assumption stand. But faced with an opportunity to join a knitting group run by a very sweet new shop owner, he decides to play along. Even if it means he has to pretend he wants to learn how to knit. Even if it means he has to hide his skill with a crochet hook. It’ll be worth it to get to know Crowley better. Probably. Hopefully. (It will.)

Waking Up Slow by the_moonmoth (E)

“Then you’ll just have to come back with me," Aziraphale said. “You what?” “You’ll have to come and isolate with me, at my cottage.” The thing about messing with people, Crowley thought, was that sometimes, they genuinely surprised you. After both being exposed to coronavirus, total strangers Crowley and Aziraphale are forced to wait out their isolation together. A tale of soft winter romance by the sea.

- Mod D

[keets-writing-corner]

NOT ME

WRITING A LUCIFER FIC

AND REALIZING THAT WHAT BOOTED HIM FROM HEAVEN WAS THE HEAVEN ELDERS/ANCIENTS

AND NOT HAVING INCLUDED THATIN THE FIC

WHO ARE THEY????????????

anyways don't mind me just compiling any references of them I can find and/or other sources and/or speculate just to have it all in one place

K so first explicit reference is in Overture during the exposition dump by Charlie. Not sure which EXPLICITLY are these guys so Imma just add/assume who I think

This them? Are these the assholes?

hmmmm okay either that WASN'T them and she was just talking about angels in general, OR Lucifer was ONE OF THEM, but I'm skeptical

okay assuming these 6 guys are the elders, I heard the number 6 somewhere else too, but that's an unverified source. Okay so maybe he's just a really OLD angel but younger than the elders? Were they like his strict homophobic/fantasy forbidding family or whatever?

Okay so that's clearly Sera and these silhouettes are different, so NOT the elders

Side note, why is Sera so BIG

anyways

that was episode 1... I don't think there's any mention of elders until Dad Beat Dad so let's go to there

Here they are

6 of them again, and the silhouettes match much closer the ones where Charlie directly talks about them. They have 6 wings too tho, so I'm willing to go out on a limb they're all seraphim like Lucifer and Lucifer and Sera were just younger ones (personally headcanoning that Lucifer is even older than Sera, maybe she looked up to him?)

TIME TO GO THROUGH WELCOME TO HEAVEN FRAME BY FRAME AHHH

okay the way Emily says that makes it sound like there are only two seraphim, herself and sera, and lucifer but he clearly doesn't count anymore. So then what are the elders? A different class of seraphim??? they got the 6 wings so what's going on???

"The seraphim" as in a group. But Emily didn't know about the exterminations... IM SO CONFUSED

Sera okayed the extermination, we know that much, but Emily didn't know about it. Do/did the elders know???

K looking at the court angels

Sera and Emily are clearly the highest ranking, there are at least a handful of familiar silhouettes that could be seen in the exposition, so I'm guessing none of these are winners and are all OG angels

are the mysterious elders the ones passing divine judgement?? nobody else is in the loop and they seem the type to withhold information

oh REALLY mmm say like the opinions of 6 crusty old angles is being treated like law??

me: -trying my hardest to dig up lore that I need/want for the fic- Hazbin hotel: teehee you don't know >:)

I did find confirmation that the rest of the court (not-seraphim) in fact did not know about the extermination, look at how equally horrified they are during "You didn't know"

I'm scrounging for scraps in a dumpster I swear

Sera IS the head Seraphim, which would make sense if it's just between her and Emily who's younger (and her job is just to keep everyone happy, which is very suiting for her) but it does imply a degree of separation between Emily/Sera levels of seraphim and whatever the elders are

"Heaven" needs them to perform their roles... but Sera isn't the highest authority, cuz she's scared that maybe someone else would boot Emily from heaven just for asking questions. The elders are clearly ABOVE Sera if she can't do anything about their verdicts.

okay side note

ohhohoho did Sera feel bad for Lucifer >:3c were they CLOSE? >:3c DID SHE DO NOTHING TO HELP HIM??? >:3c Is she ashamed? Is this why she just folds to preserve whatever the elders ordered? Is she scared of them?

Okay only other episode I can look at rn is the last one

sooooooo yeah these two are the only Seraphim that aren't considered "elders" ugh okay things gathered from the episode:

Both Elders and Seraphim have 6 wings

as far as seraphim go, including Lucifer, there are only 3 total that we know of if not period and they are highest ranking but subordinate to the elders

the Elders hold absolute authority being the ones who very clearly and (implied) violently booted Lucifer out of heaven, Sera cannot override their decisions and fears Emily also being booted

They have very specific silhouettes and there are 6 of them

TIME TO SCROUNGE THE INTERNET

nope nevermind, the only thing I found from an actual source was Vivziepop saying in a stream, and I'm paraphrasing the wiki that links it "Information about heaven is being wrapped for later in the series" "It is very interesting" and Dave Capdevielle has a thing about heaven he finds interesting but won't talk about it cuz it's spoilers

In conclusion: RIP ME guess I'll just have to head canon my way through chapter 1 of my fic, ugh I have so much rewriting/adding to do

Chapter 1 is already like 10k words (the fic so far has 30k words and I'm pretty sure that amount is going to quadruple or quintuple by the time I'm done) UGH FINE LETS GO

On the bright side, this gives me MOAR ANGST OPPORTUNITIES? hmmm I might just tweak what I have tho and add some extra scenes? Major thinking needs to be done

[theminecraftbee]

"Pick 2 fics and I'll combine them somehow"

Attempt 33 and solving counting sheep?

(was going to ask scs + boatem roadtrip, but that was answered by a crystal clear mental image of the meme "gee Three, how come you get two crises of selfhood after being changed into something eldritch by forces beyond your control")

okay so there are two directions to take this one--actually no hold on make that three:

three stuck in a time loop, we write about the thirty-third attempt to escape this time loop. interestingly, i think that while three wouldn't have the SAME neuroses about it as joe hills (fewer groundhog day references, for one, but also three has less of a painful need to help people to its own detriment), it would have a similar problem of "constantly approaching the goal line and refusing to entertain getting off of that path". this would be a fic in which three has a few brand new existential crises, for sure! i think that three would like... be less transparently SAD about everything? but also would be a lot more. this would be a fast way to get three to descend into mission mode. it'd be fun!

joe hills turned into a watcher weapon. to be honest, i don't know where, exactly, to take that one; i knew what i wanted from three because i was playing in the territory of a bunch of existing tropes. i knew what a typical watcher!grian looked like, i knew what a typical winter soldier fic looked like, and i knew what themes of identity i wanted to play with. joe hills would be a bit more uncharted, partially on the front of "there really aren't as many joe hills whump tropes for me to play around with unfortunately" and partially on the front of "well, three ISN'T grian, and i'm not sure what shape i'd make the person who isn't joe". so, there you go there.

but then i remembered another old fic idea i could mention that, in a literal plot sense, doesn't combine these two fics that much, but in a THEMATIC sense, very much does. anyway a while ago i had this fic idea i never wrote out where, one day, traffic!cleo wakes up in hermit!cleo's place, in a universe where we assume those are two different people who live two different lives, and the fallout from that is Messy To Say The Least. this is one of those fics i have a title from a song for in my head--"To a Poet"--and a few VERY STRONG scenes in my head. for the record the themes here that combine are "joe's inability to stop helping people even to his own detriment", "dealing with people seeing you for someone you aren't and expecting you to remember things you don't", and "oh my god all of these people have so much trauma and that affects their relationships so bad". man i should pull this fic out of the back burner again sometime, it really was a good idea...

[definitelynotshouting]

got tagged by my beloved @sillyfairygarden for the "list 5 songs you have on repeat" ask game :]

Forever by Noah Kahan which has been playing on loop in my brain for the past four days straight while i worked on my latest fic, which pulls some of the lyrics for its title!! Admittedly this song isn't my favorite by him, im more of a Paul Revere girlie, but i utterly adore the chorus and it massages my brain each time i hear it :]

Spectator by Friday Pilots Club which has like. THE dirtiest bass line ive heard in a while and also includes one of my magical earworm chord transitions in the chorus. Like holy shit. My brain is melting in the BEST of ways and ive been looping it whenever i want to feel action-y without actually thinking

On a much lighter musical note ive been listening a lot to Arboretum by Sparkbird since it first came out like two weeks ago, which like, shout out to the anon who introduced me to him im so hooked now. Im utterly obsessed with the different tempos and times meshed together in this song so seamlessly, and the lyrics are like POETRY (this song has also made it to my scarian playlist LOL the lyrics are so top tier for them imo)

. dont look at me but this is my number one song to loop when i need to get shit done and want an insanely catchy tune to do it with anyway go listen to Vending Machine of Love by The Stupendium i promise you it is so so funny and so so worth it (and full of INSANE wordplay too) (also it IS suggestive so keep that in mind if u go to listen)

This list would not be complete by me without a City and Colour song so i offer up The Love Still Held Me Near, which is SO GORGEOUS and constantly makes me think of lighthouses and fog and crashing seas.... this is my go-to loop for his songs rn its so full of life and energy while still feeling melancholy in a gorgeously aching way im OBSESSED OKAY GO LISTEN YOU WANNA LISTEN TO THIS SOOOO BAD GO GO GO ‼️‼️‼️‼️💥💥💥💥💥

Okay i am tagginggggg.... @squish--squash @corvidaearts @cocoabats @emberglowfox @raichett :]

[castlebyersafterdark]

Or waking him up with a hand already on his cock, or mouth around him.

Ok this is something ive vaguely wondered about for a long time and never known how to broach cos im sure most people will say it's Just Fantasy. i see this somno idea presented in extreme ways and more casual, like this one you mentioned. im curious about it because my initial reaction on seeing this hc was - is this based on people's real experiences, or fantasies alone, or just hcs for the boys/fictional characters? or all? because issues of consent become a bit grey here. maybe im just thinking of women's experiences and how women's discomfort can be minimized in pop culture. perhaps its different in your experience, as a gay man or in gay culture.

i kind of get icky when i see people throwing the need for constant blatant verbal consent around because post-weinstein we've lost a lot of the sexiness and complicity of non-verbal communication and consent in sex. but my brain always thinks of those cases where the guy doesnt think its even possible to rape a girl if theyre married or in a relationship. so anything goes, and yes and no blur. ofc mike and will are in a loving relationship, but what happens if one of them wakes up and feels a bit weird about it, totally not in the mood or just had a totally different sleep experience and is thrown for a loop because the other has a mouth around them? would they always be able to recover and just say no and separate (physically) and be fine? im not sure.

idk its such a tricky one. maybe with byler theyve had conversations before where they're like its always ok to wake me up with a bj lol

This is a good one and I wondered if the question would ever come up because I know it's a controversial sex act / kink! Definitely onto something with some of it being in the realm of fantasy - but it is realistic for a lot of people as well. I'll offer my own perspective under the cut at the end like I usually do when I get too embarrassingly tmi/personal haha. But it's hard to explain this particular one without a real life perspective.

The consent aspect is a big part and one that's incredibly important in real life - but I'll personally admit when it comes to fanfic or just a simple HC post, there are certain aspects of fictional sex lives I just choose to gloss over and/or leave out. Because it is a bit of a fantasy world and a lot of assumptions are made. (Do yall know how many asks I get requesting details and preferences on the intricacies of anal sex prep? Yall. Suspension of disbelief. There's so many advice and sexual health articles out there to read up on if you're so curious, it's... implied. No offense to the curious mind, I appreciate the genuine approach, but I ain't including all that in a fic hahaha. ANYWAY)

i kind of get icky when i see people throwing the need for constant blatant verbal consent around because post-weinstein we've lost a lot of the sexiness and complicity of non-verbal communication and consent in sex.

I know exactly what you mean. And I don't know what goes on in most people's real sex lives, but in fanfic world, there can sometimes be a sort of "over-correction" when it comes to the way dialogue and consent is written. You just... gotta make it sound natural. So much reads like a sex ed pamphlet. There's a way to add consent and communication into the flow rather than a pause to deliver a PSA. Easier said that done, I know. It's important, but we don't have to treat what is fantasy and playing around with creativity as a manual for education every time. Real life... isn't A,B,C dialogue choices. Hard to explain, you know??? This isn't covering all the extreme kink explorations and all - which I don't really write so I'm not diving into that. There's an entirely different world out there regarding bdsm but it's not my world so I have little to offer in terms of conversation. As well as the cnc kink which is a whole other ballpark. Valid, but not the topic I'm including with this. This is more of a "light" version.

Gosh. Ok. Here is personal insight which kind of informs how I approach the topic of something like consent and especially a somno style sex act in realistic practice:

It definitely is very personality based - communication, trust, sex drive, what both partners are into. Goes along with the idea of "natural flow of conversation and sex" and really knowing your partner. So. We both know we're very comfortable with each other's bodies and in a well established relationship - we know each other's moods. This isn't something that's happening every day! Or even every week! An occasional indulgence. It's intimate, sharing a bed with someone long term. If you or your partner goes to bed exhausted or a bit upset or off-kilter from the day, feeling sick or just in an odd mood - obviously life just goes about normally. There are times though, when let's say... the night ended after a lot of sex, just a really intimate time and drifting off to sleep from a really passionate session and you know. Continuing in the next morning isn't hmm. Out of the ordinary. The vibes linger from falling asleep into waking again. It's hard to describe - sometimes blatantly spoken in the heat of passion when it's so good and you're still feeling greedy even before it's over ("I'd love to wake up to you fucking me") or something crazy. Or, you just know you'd both go another round before bed if you weren't so tired, so you pass out but whoever wakes up first may just get a head start and continue.

It's... a lot of just knowing your partner. Feeling comfortable to know if you wake up and oh, that's happening and you're not into it? You can just say "babe, I kinda want to just go back to sleep" and you know they'll ease off and let you be. Or, you wake up to a nice surprise and it's a shock at first, but you then relax and let it happen, or vice versa doing something to them. More often it's one of those instances more where you both wake up, very in the stirring strings of half awake, half asleep, and one partner is a little more awake and has the idea. And the half asleep one is like, oh? Sure! I'm just gonna drift though, you have fun. Go to town. It can be like that, too. This all feels very normal and within the flow of an established couple with a pretty active sex life. Just in my opinion.

I've read a lot of sex forums and kink forums because I'm curious about a lot of things! And sex is interesting to me beyond just titillation (using that one for another anon who adores the word haha), sometimes it's just fascinating research. I've read a lot of instances specifically with women, some are actually really into the practice and find it really hot to wake up to their partner either going down on them or starting to fuck them, when they're still sleeping. After conversations about it - there's the consent talk. Now, proceed. They'll wear a specific hair tie or bracelet when they go to sleep, signalling that they're looking for this sex act to happen if so desired. That's the communication, that's the greenlight. No bracelet - no touchy. I don't really practice anything like that because it's not like this is something we do often. It's an offhand comment, it's reading the vibe, it's the half asleep fumblings on a morning lie-in when one partner wakes up with the urge. So, all in all - there are different forms of communications rather than just sitting down the edge of the bed and turning to each other and blatantly spelling out every detail and shaking hands at the end before engaging with the session.

I know there are relationships that are very how do I say it - lifestyle kinksters? Where the master/sub (I don't like the other S word to be honest) have an agreement for whatever period of time is decided upon - where there's a "free use" understanding. They've consented to the initiation of sex whenever. Often including while asleep or half-asleep. But that's also an agreed upon form of consent where it's not long form discussed previous to each encounter. That's lifestyle kink, though. Not most people. Realistically, it's more... trust and understanding of who you're sharing your bed with. Are they into it? Can you tell when they won't be? There's no real rule book.

So when it comes it fiction - I think the idea is kind of implied it's a bit like what I've personally described? Even if not really detailed in the written prose. Not that consent isn't interesting or important - but at least my writing and the writing I like to read - I'm not looking for hyper-realism or education. And there's also great worth in reading/writing some stuff that's more controversial or not perfected romance - I just don't really dive into that myself. I'm very sappy romance and idealistic, to be honest. Just what I'm good at and prefer. ☺️😘

[altraviolet]

so im neck deep in reading echo garden - hi, hope ur doing well, holy hell what is this beautiful piece of writing and worldbuilding omg? i originally wanted to ask you something like; 'what's your inspiration for your worldbuilding, what ideas did you come up with, pull/build from etc'

..but instead i wanna try and ask you a different question/for advice, if that's okay? (your writing went and gave me a mild crisis, congrats you've reached peak 'make-ppl-feel-things-thru-writing' skillz. :}) how do you even 'do' worldbuilding? because i'm doubting myself, reading your story lol. i know the whole.. 'we get inspiration from literally everything around us', 'there's no such thing as a truly original idea' etc,

but i'm just now breaking free of the thought that i have to.. produce something big and unique and grandiose? (for others? it's a weird attention-y 'ey look what i made' thing.) like, honestly, i fell in love with your worldbuilding but feel.. envious? like, 'oh, damn, i wish i was this good.' which, yeah, I KNOW is silly.

I don't know.. how to worldbuild/craft (whatever term) something that feels like mine? I keep comparing to others, and keep feeling like whatever bits and pieces come to me isn't good enough. Isn't unique/cool/giant/'oh-so-new-&-different' enough. like I have to somehow reach that impossible 'true original idea', without using any inspiration at all (otherwise it's not 'mine') - when everything's already been thought of before by countless people.

I'm sitting here in a really weird, silly, downright stupid at this point, circular loop and I don't know how to get out of it. I think not understanding what worldbuilding is, or how it works or even how having ideas works, might be why I've screwed myself here? And the internet's weird.. impossible standard for idea-having.

I have tiny pieces, the barest little foundations, I just don't know how to grow them into.. something, anything. (is maybe the thought that I ought to grow them in the first place one of the reasons I'm having trouble? and it's.. okay to not? that just because they're tiny, or simple, or mundane, doesn't mean they're worth less than 'bigger & better' chunks of ideas/worldbuilding?)

Hi! I'm doing okay, thanks. Vacation could be structured more to my liking, but family & obligation something something.

Anyway. Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying Echo Garden. Especially the worldbuilding, which is one of my favorite things to do. It seems like you're feeling a lot of mixed and heavy things about it. I don't know if I'm any authority to help you with that, but I'll give it a shot. Let's go through what you've sent me, albeit out of order. I'mma put this behind a cut, because it got very long.

>what is this beautiful piece of writing and worldbuilding omg? Thank you! I appreciate that. Here I would like to stress that this writing has taken me almost 4 years and hundreds and hundreds of hours, and hundreds of thousands of words to accomplish. If you think it is beautiful, I am happy to hear that! I will be honest: I am very proud of what I've done. But what I'm stressing here is that it was not effortless. It is beautiful, but it has taken a lot of work.

>i fell in love with your worldbuilding but feel.. envious? like, 'oh, damn, i wish i was this good.' which, yeah, I KNOW is silly. No, that's not silly. That's legit. Envy or jealousy are totally normal things to feel in any given situation. If the situations were reversed, I'd feel the same way. When I see people who have things or skills I wish I had, I feel it. This might be a good time to drop a little story about when I first thought about writing TF fic. Please do me a favor and go read this ask, you can skip down to the bold words that say NOTE THE WARNINGS AND TAGS BEFORE READING. Here I talk about how I didn't write for a year because I read a fic so good I knew I could never be that good.

tl;dr and/or moral: it's ok and natural to feel envious. Don't let it stop you from writing, though. If I had let TGWP stop me from writing, you'd never have Echo Garden. That'd be a shame, I think. I'm glad I decided to try writing, even though I knew I couldn't do something as good as what I admired. I did something else.

>how do you even 'do' worldbuilding? because i'm doubting myself, reading your story lol. i know the whole.. 'we get inspiration from literally everything around us', 'there's no such thing as a truly original idea' etc, I'll come back to your first question eventually, but I wanna address the latter statements: "We get inspiration from everything around us," yes, this is true. Being a sponge, being observant of the world, will help you build a 'library' of ideas. Artists have a term for this that escapes me at the moment, but the idea is, if an artist draws 1000 trees, and within those, 50 different kinds of trees, they now have an excellent mental tree 'library' to reference when they need to draw a tree. And since it's super easy to find irl references of trees, one might ask, what's the use of the mental library? It gives the artist the basics and a ton of variations on The Concept of a Tree. In a similar way, observing the world, reading stories, listening to music, absorbing creative works, etc will also add to your mental library. You can call on these things when worldbuilding later. Quick example: if you know the ins and outs of a hospital, because you're a nurse, you'll have a fantastic basis for a realistically operating sci fi hospital on another world. Take a concept relating to the hospital, as we know it on Earth, and change it. What if patients can regrow internal organs but not limbs? See what that does to the organization of the hospital. The staff, the pharmacy, the stock, the medical supplies. What changes? Organ donors aren't needed anymore. Would this mean an actual reduction in the species's understanding of how those organs work? An irl nurse won't have to do a ton of research to get the basics which are drawn upon to answer those questions.

This line of questioning took me to something I want to expand upon later, but for now: What kind of cultural issues could arise from this species's healing ability? Is someone who was forced to grow a new liver due to an accident "less than" someone who has their original liver? Hold onto the fact that we just went from hospital -> biology -> culture. "There's no such thing as a truly original idea," I disagree with this statement, though I know it is a very, very popular one. I think it is true that plots and archetypes are commonly used over and over again. I think there are still original ideas out there, though. I pride myself on it, to be honest. Some of the worldbuilding you like so much comes from ideas that I've not seen in either TF canon or fanon. They tend to be smaller details that feed into bigger systems, once you take them to their logical endpoints. More on that later.

>I keep comparing to others, and keep feeling like whatever bits and pieces come to me isn't good enough. Isn't unique/cool/giant/'oh-so-new-&-different' enough.

All I can say here is that comparison is the thief of joy. If we're talking strictly fanfic, it shouldn't be this stressful on you. People love tropes for a reason. Don't be afraid to use them. Echo Garden itself has a few. "Enemies to lovers" never quite felt like the correct term, but it is recognizable and there are tons of fans of it. Remember the thing about me not writing for a year cuz I thought I wasn't good enough. Don't do that. Comparison is the thief of joy! >like I have to somehow reach that impossible 'true original idea', without using any inspiration at all (otherwise it's not 'mine') - when everything's already been thought of before by countless people.

Again, I do think there are truly original ideas still out there. You have a unique view of the world. Writing is one way to share it. All your experiences, your education, your hardships and your victories shape who you are. No one else will be looking out the same eyeballs. With practice, you can find ideas. I'll explain how I do it. Maybe that will help you, too. Though you do have, by your own words, little pieces: I have tiny pieces, the barest little foundations, I just don't know how to grow them into.. something, anything. Little pieces are a good place to start. And if they stay little, that's fine. Having a ton of little pieces layered on top of each other is what contributes richness to your world.

My goal with all the above was to address the emotional aspect of your ask. I haven't gone through everything, but I'd like to get to your core question. I am going to answer it literally, in a way that might not help you, then try to break it down into something that might be helpful.

how do you even 'do' worldbuilding?

I think. All the time. I am one of those people who has a laser focus and is able to make connections between unrelated ideas. I am always, always thinking. It's not really daydreaming. It's thinking about a single idea and then taking it for a ride down a million "what if?" paths. Put it this way: I think watching astronomy lectures is fun and I loathe parties. Fun for me is world building: building literal worlds. Playing with ideas. So how do I 'do' worldbuilding? Mostly in my head. Once I get some ideas that make sense, I write them down so I don't forget them. If I'm lucky, I'm at home at my computer and can type them fast. If I'm not, I'm at work, and I scribble them on pieces of paper. It can be anything, from a huge plot point to a teeny tiny detail.

How do I think? If I'm world building from nothing (as opposed to solving a problem or building on top of previously thought of stuff), I just... think of things that fascinate me. For Transformers, that's their biology and how it links to culture. It's their alienness. The possible geology of their world. I freaking love just thinking about that!

Once you have a fascinating idea, you push it. What does that mean? Do you recall, in the nurse/hospital example above, I noted that, while we started with 'hospital setting,' it moved to how that healing factor could be interpreted in the culture of that species? That was what I mean: taking the idea of 'alien hospital' to 'what does this mean about their biology?' to 'what does this mean about their culture?' And to be honest, this is how I do a lot of world building. Culture comes from biology and geology. This is a personal theory I have, I'm sure anthropologists have a better definition of culture. But that's the one I use for worldbuilding. What is the consequence of your fascinating idea? That is the key for me. That is how I worldbuild.

If I'm worldbuilding on top of previous stuff, it's sometimes a bit harder or easier, depending on how the previous stuff narrows your possibilities. But in that case, I usually try to be as logical as possible. Here's an example for Echo Garden:

canon facts: the Lost Light has a fuel furnace and an engine room and a bridge

me: hmm, okay, the LL has utilities and facilities, kind of like a small town. someone has to tend to those things. I'm sure some mechs have specialized knowledge that makes them a better fit for maintaining/upkeeping certain things than others. We saw Blaster on the bridge acting as a communications officer of sorts. Hmm, he's probably the best bet for keeping comm-related stuff clean and running. Hmm, that fuel furnace... I bet it's really hot in there, lol. I bet it's complicated in there. They probably have to color code the pathways to the different furnaces. I bet most mechs wouldn't like being in there because it's so hot. I wonder who'd get stuck with that chore. Well... Rodimus is fireproof, basically, and Trailbreaker could protect himself with his shield. So they can do that chore.

It feels rambly when I write it out. I suppose it could be. I do this very quickly in my mind, though. I pull from everything I know: canon, fanon, things I know from my own life experiences. This 'pulling' happens all at the same time. So, going back to that 'mental library,' as you can see, that's a powerful thing for me to have for my worldbuilding method.

Okay okay, so how can I make all that into something actionable by you? Good question. I suppose I will answer it with more questions!

Precisely define what it is you want to worldbuild. Is it cultural (language, food, clothing, music, etc)? Is it biological (bodies, adaptations, appearance, etc)? Is it environmental (geology of the world, or the inside of a space ship)? What exactly do you want to accomplish?

Once you have selected your Topic, think about all the things related to that Topic. What are the usual characteristics of Topic? Which of those characteristics can you change to fit your world? Example: food in TF. Food is often energon or engex. Food in real life is a huge part of culture. If your goal is to showcase a character making a special dish, maybe pick an irl dish you like, and see how its preparation would change if it was made out of a pretty, glowy energon-y substance instead of whatever it's made of on Earth.

If you haven't worldbuilt to your satisfaction, try another avenue. What else about Topic can you think of? What are your personal experiences regarding Topic? Maybe go do some research on Topic- you might find a neat little tidbit to incorporate into your writing.

Once you've worldbuilt Topic to your satisfaction, link it to the rest of your world! What does Topic existing do to your environment? To your characters? It's okay if Topic isn't a huge deal. That's totally fine! It's lovely to just have little worldbuilding details hanging around in the background. Remember- layering lots of tiny details really helps make a world feel rich and lived in. In the event that Topic is a big deal, repeat step 2 to discover how it affects your world.

Once Topic is happily integrated into your world, repeat the process! Take breaks, listen to music. Zone out. See if your brain can make some weird connections while you're not even really thinking about it. Be open to something that sounds kinda nuts at first. Maybe there's a way to pull it off! Or maybe not.

Side note: if you think of a really cool idea but it doesn't fit into the story you're writing right now, stick it in a file for later. Mmm, delicious ideas file, ready to be cannibalized for your next story.

So... yeah! That's how I worldbuild. Thinking a LOT and connecting ideas together and then pushing them to logical extremes/conclusions.

If you have any specific questions about anything I've written, feel free to ask. I don't think my method will work for everyone, but hopefully you can put your own spin on it and find a method that works for you.

Best of luck and happy worldbuilding :)

[allwaswell16]

Hi lovely and thank for your sharing and caring in this fandom!

A bit finicky question, I'm here with. Don't know if I managed to mention different perspectives enough and contextualize it the way I wanted to, but anyway, do feel free to ignore or maybe just leave some tags:

What are your thoughts, your two pennies and just today (tomorrow is another day and maybe a new perspective), about the conversation going on about the commenting culture (nowadays in AO3):

the lack and/or decline of it

the urgent need for community, engagement, participation and positive feedback loop for authors

but also the growing and changing audience for fanfic

the growing idea that a fic is not a gift (it most certainly is) but some "factory produced and guaranteed content that keeps on coming and you are entitled to it"

the lack of reading comprehension skills

and the lack of skills to figure out the appropriate time and place for giving critique

but also the small but growing portion of authors who demand only certain kind of praise, worded in a certain kind of way and if not delivered accordingly attack brutally on everything and everyone

the cultural differencies as a player in participating, giving positive feedback and even using foreign language words

and of course the ever growing and spreading comment anxiety on "both sides"

and so on...

So how do you see it? What's your perspective? You are both an author and a reader. But then again, you are a reader who writes, so you actually know, what a writer likes to see in their comment field...

Hi, anon! Whew, well this is a lot, but I'm going to answer as much as I can haha. As you said, this is just my own perspective on things. I'd say I also have a little added perspective of being a writer who reads and writes in more than one popular fanfic fandom. So I can't help but compare my experiences in both.

I don't think the One Direction fandom has ever been overly generous with the kudos and comments to be perfectly honest. I think if you talk to writers who are active in other fic fandoms of similar sizes/popularity, they'd likely agree with that.

I want to be clear to start with here that I feel like readers have been very kind to me over the years. I've been here a long time now though, so I get the benefit of the doubt with some long time readers and those who subscribe to my ao3. But I also think that in part I have encouraged comments in a way that not every writer can or wants to do.

I answer every single comment. I answer them in a way that mirrors back the comment that was made. If you leave a long comment, I answer back in detail. If you send me something shorter, (which is fine and I love any and all comments!) I will answer back in a similar way. I also answer back pretty quickly. There are times I get behind, but I rarely get behind more than a month or so. And the day my fic posts, I try to answer every comment that gets posted on that first day.

Am I saying everyone needs to do what I do? Absolutely not! It takes a lot of time and energy to do that! But I do think there's a correlation to be made there. Readers see all the comments, see they're being answered quickly, and feel comfortable or like it's okay to leave one, too. OH, and also I want to say that me answering back (maybe obsessively) quickly is something that probably isn't possible for people who have a fic explode in popularity. I might have some popular fics but none of them were like overnight explosions in popularity. They've all been slow burners lol.

As for concrit with fic...I think it depends on the fandom. It is not something that is looked upon kindly in ours. There are definitely writers out there who ask for it which is fine, but the etiquette in our fandom is not to offer it unless asked for it. In my opinion, this makes a lot of sense for our fandom. Since writers are not getting the numbers of kudos and comments that are given more freely in other fandoms, it's a bit of a hard pill to swallow that we'd then expect them to also take unsolicited writing critiques.

Just using my own fics as an example, by the time I publish a fic multiple other writers have already read it. It's been proofread and betad by a writer with an MFA in creative writing. I'm not going to be taking concrit seriously from someone whose background in writing I don't know. When I publish the fic, it's done, I'm happy with the result, and I'm not going back to it to make changes. So there's not much point in telling me what I should have done differently with it.

Your point about some writers being perhaps overly sensitive about some comments...I wanted to say a few things about. There are a few common comments that immediately came to mind that writers have differing views on, and I think it's worthwhile for readers to think about.

One is something like I wish this was longer or please write more of this. If you comment this on any of my fics, I'll smile and consider it a compliment that you enjoyed it enough to want more. If you go through my comments, you'll see this is indeed what I've replied back to comments like that. There are other writers that are going to be exasperated by that comment or even offended by it. And even though I'm not one of them, I would say try to see it from their perspective.

What if that writer has spent months on that fic the reader considers "short"? I think readers sometimes forget just how much TIME goes into these fics. Just because a fic is 10k, 5k, whatever doesn't mean it didn't take a long time to write. And someone who spent months of time on something who likely didn't receive a whole lot of comments in the first place, and then one of the few comments they get could be interpreted as this wasn't enough. That's disheartening, you know? I think if you have the urge to leave that comment, maybe think first about the writer you're leaving that comment for. Or even think of a different way to say it like, "I could have lived in this fic forever" which is what I like to think is what most readers are trying to convey with comments like that.

Another one is who tops? Just don't, I'd say for that comment. I simply don't answer ones like that. But I'd say check the tags. If it's not tagged, either choose to move on if you have to know to read it or ctrl+F the fic yourself for the word "cock" or whatever. If the writer doesn't tag it, it means they didn't care about that. Or they got annoyed with their fics being reduced to that too often. PWP eh fine, but my 80k amnesia au I had a nervous breakdown writing that has one sex scene...eff off that's not what the fic is about. I once wrote a fic about grief. GRIEF! (well, and Antarctic scientists) that people argued over whether it was bottom Louis. And I resolved to never tag it again after that.

As for the fic as a gift vs not a gift I agree with you...I don't know what else you'd call something that is given for free. That's the definition of "gift." If someone reads the fic, a kudos is like a verbal thank you and a comment would be like a thank you card.

The comment anxiety thing I don't have an issue with myself, but I know writers who do and can't bring themselves to answer their comments. One of my friends feels so badly for not answering but when she tries she says her replies don't feel like enough. It's too bad that she can't answer due to actually loving her comments TOO much! Anxiety is a bitch for sure. For anyone who wants to leave a comment but is worried about it, I promise that super short ones or even keysmashes or emojis are very welcome! I have a mutual on tumblr who leaves the same comment on every one of my fics that simply says she loved the fic and I promise it makes me happy every single time because now I know she read it and enjoyed it whereas I might have missed whether or not she left a kudos. And when I see her on my dash, I think that's the one who loves my fics! :)

I swear I'm gonna stop rambling, but I want to end with one more thing. I think it would be interesting for readers and writers to experience a different fandom sometime if they're only in this one. It's not always a better/worse thing, but it might make people more open to trying new things like commenting/replying more or in different ways.

[violetren]

Idk why people are like "they're poly" but then act like Sara is just a kinda sad side piece or distraction. Maybe it's different in the main fic circles than it is in Tumblr tags.

Like yeah they are poly so therefore just because Sara isn't also dating Elizabeth and Peter doesn't mean she's an outsider who is getting in the way or out of the loop, or whatever. It just means she isn't also dating El and Peter.

Like holy hell El and Peter drag them to dinner and talk to them both about how relationships are worth the work. Without them Neal and Sara never would have made it beyond a one time hook up. They want their boy to have good things and good people in his life. Why wouldn't they want him to find some happiness with a driven, good hearted woman, who calls Neal on his shit, who knows what she'd be getting into and is willing to get into it anyways?

[spumonibones]

I've noticed that yandere corrupted Venti pics are aplenty, but ...

I think a corrupted yandere Xiao fic has potential

Oh very much so, especially with the karmic debt, and the theory that Abyssal Corruption actually enhances your negative ambitions!! (Good stuff for twisting love from afar into an obsession that results in abandoning his post) I can probably type up at least af fic idea for it! Unfortunately at the moment I'm not at a point I could write a fic like that - still looking over my shoulder thanks to some personal experiences. These two have been a sort of "safe, comfort" ship since. But! I'm pretty sure I saw some fic summaries with that! When I find them, I'll send those your way! :]

As for a fic idea... Hmm. I know there's a popular Time Loop theory for Genshin. But, I'm not a big fan of it? Far too often those storylines get fumbled hard, and it would feel too much like a cop-out to escape the growing retcons instead of accepting that the story has changed since the game's start. (Which is pretty normal for games of this nature) Ah. Sorry. Anyway. There could be a parallel timeline. Maybe in that one, the Sinner from the Abyss acted sooner, and Teyvat has been coated in Abyssal energy? Oh, Xiao's beta design would work well for an Abyss-infected variation! (More under cut because WOW this got long??)

If his Barbatos died trying to stop the Sinner, it would be motivation to find ways of different times in which Barbatos still lives. Given the Monstadt story prologue, we know that Venti can get "poisoned" from Abyssal energy. If our... Let's call him, "Void Xiao," to mitigate confusion. As players we're taught to associate the Abyss Realm with the Abyss Order, though we've learned in Fontaine these don't always go hand in hand. Another term for the Abyss Realm is the Void Realm, so it'll function for these needs.

I looked up the definition of yandere, and included it for anyone that may need it! (I actually like this because it notes that this incorrectly tries to attribute these actions to mental illness. Individuals with mental illness are significantly more likely to be victims! When looking at "real life" examples of yandere attitudes, it's often individuals with no respect for the boundaries of others, and a sense of entitlement. No one owes anyone else their time or affection - always place firm boundaries, and if you ever feel unsafe do what you must to get out of the situation to be safe!!)

Back to the story idea! Hmm. Maybe VoidXiao got access to Forbidden Knowledge and that's how he jumped timelines...? If the Sinner took over Teyvat, the Heavenly Principles/Primordial One wouldn't be there to enforce the Laws they created. The whole world would be infected with Forbidden Knowledge and Void energy, and access would be easy. Don't quote me, but I'm pretty sure the game describes karmic debt to be different from Abyssal Corruption? But it (karmic debt) does sound similar to Forbidden Knowledge in its affects.

And if we go that karmic debt and Forbidden Knowledge ARE connected, he might even just have access to it as the Abyssal Corruption enhances that ambition to possess, and in a way protects him from succumbing to karmic debt to instead control it? Hmm. Might be bit of a stretch, but there's potential, maybe?

But, it would allow for a corrupted yandere Xiao! Though I feel like someone already wrote this...? Ah, if this is a fic summary I read and am just regurgitating, please let know the fic! 😭 I'll link it and delete my text if this is the case!

I'm sorry if this isn't a good request fulfillment orz

I think the first thing Void Xiao would do, is try to kill the main timeline Xiao and dump him in the Chasm where no one can find the body. Xiao could get saved by the Black Serpent knights, of whom are on a loop of protecting people and with the Abyssal Corruption on our Xiao, might mistake him for a dying hilichurl. The Fatui underground could then further help him identifying what they believe is an injured person and as we learn from them while in there, they aren't inherently bad people. I think they would genuinely try to help him, even with their limited resources.

Anyway, Void Xiao would split his attentions between capturing the time he lost with Barbatos, never being close enough to risk hurting Venti with the Abyssal energy (in Monstadt prologue, we get confirmation it "poisons" Venti when he gets hurt by it when the Traveler+Paimon interrupt him attempting to heal Dvalin). But also that distance is so Venti *can't* identify that Void Xiao is compromised. Lots of bittersweet moments, with Venti happy that what he thinks is his Xiao finally wants to spend time with him. Void Xiao savoring each visit, the painful reminder it could be so easily taken away again, that this was something he once refused and now sees was for silly reasons.

The other would be him trying to empower Venti by gathering more believers. I know there's general agreement that Venti is much stronger than he let's on, and I won't get into that discussion too much. But in this story, if however strong he is wasn't enough to survive the Sinner, Void Xiao would see fit to give him more strength to maybe stand a better chance when the time comes in this world. (Perhaps there was never a Traveler in his timeline, and that's why the Sinner acted sooner?)

I can see him rescuing people from old habits, telling them that Barbaros sent him to save them. Venti would notice more people going to the church, worshiping the statue. Would get a bit confused, why are people getting more into... That? All the while, Void Xiao is feeling jealous. He understands WHY everyone wants to fawn over Venti when he sings, when he plays music. But do they have to get so close? And Monstadt citizens start getting hurt, going missing. Venti recognizes the pattern, and while he investigates Void Xiao goes with, pretending he doesn't know who did it either. All while adoring how "kind" Venti is, even to worry about his "stalkers" (none on the citizens ever were).

Our Xiao has strength to call for help, and Zhongli comes. Gives him the adeptal drink to help stave off the mix of karmic debt and Abyssal Corruption threatening to consume him, too. His only resistance is that he SAW what he becomes if he let it, and that if he doesn't resist Venti WILL get hurt and he'll be helping to hurt him instead of warning him. Once strong enough, he struggles towards Monstadt, hoping he isn't too late.

Back over, Venti is noticing the trend and speaks with Dilic, well aware the man has also been following closely. They make a plan. Diluc pretends to be tipsy and be "too friendly" with Venti, and Venti "leaves." On Diluc's way back to the Dawn Winery, he gets attacked and is READY.

Except he's face to face with a demon. Diluc struggles in the fight, recognize the Abyssal energy his opponent is using. Venti shows up to help (he was tailing Diluc with enough distance), and is horrified to see the state Void Xiao is in, that HE'S the one that had been hurting people. Void Xiao holds Diluc hostage, telling Venti that he's doing what he has to. Doesn't Venti enjoy time with him, too? Doesn't Venti want to be with him? Venti asks him to let Diluc go. Diluc is one of his children, and was just pretending because Venti asked him to so he could find the culprit. He tries to reach out to the last goodness on Void Xiao, not wanting to hurt him but also trying to save Diluc.

Diluc is not blinded by the love that Venti is. He can very well see that Void Xiao is ready to kill Diluc once Venti isn't there to force the corrupted one to save face. He uses his Delusion (in Canon he has the one that killed his father), and the Pyro distracts/hurts Void Xiao enough he can put some distance. Venti helps hold off Void Xiao, and tells Diluc to run. Diluc doesn't want to leave, but Venti goes Full Barbatos and gives that look parents give to their kids to know they can either willingly go to their room or get carried to it. So Diluc runs, but back to Monstadt for backup.

Void Xiao, now terrified he's going to lose Venti again, shifts to more desperate measures. If Venti is corrupted, maybe he'll be safe? Maybe he'll understand? Too far deep into the affects of the Abyssal Corruption to realize this would kill Venti. So Void Xiao pleads - please? Won't Venti hold his hand while he succumbs to karmic debt? Playing on that kindness Venti has. And why would Venti refuse? Warped as Void Xiao is, he still thinks this is his Xiao! Yes, he'll get poisoned, but he'll just go to Windrise again to get cleansed.

Except Void Xiao grabs him, claws in and bites down so Venti can't get away without hang to literally rip the other off. The energy immediately starts trying to seep in, Venti struggling to get away, trying to find how to do so without hurting Void Xiao too much. Void Xiao is whispering it'll be okay, giving the soft kisses he always wanted to give but until then couldn't.

And then Xiao shows up, cutting clean off both Void Xiao's arms to save Venti. It's slow-mo. Venti turning, eyes widening to see his Xiao there, full of exhaustion but there. Xiao glaring at Void Xiao through his mask, more angry that he was killing Venti with cruelty while whispering how much he loved him. Void Xiao, who's eyes never leave Venti even as the corruption forms monstrous arms so he can "save" himself and Venti "from" this timeline's Xiao.

Diluc arrives with Jean, Kaeya, Rosaria, and Lisa (Jean knew, Kaeya and Lisa figured it out, and Rosaria learned about it while tailing Venti when doing her own investigation of the injured/missing citizens). Xiao orders them to get Venti to Windrise, as their best option is Barbatos not dying? But Void Xiao tries to prevent that, and it becomes a battle to not get infected themselves, and getting Venti who's getting weaker to the tree.

It's difficult and long, but they do get to Windrise. Venti gets stronger, Void Xiao gets weaker. And at the end, the last of the Abyssal Corruption leaving a dying Void Xiao, Venti holds him. Gives him those last moments that he never got. Afterwards, he checks on his children, on his Xiao. Everyone is hurt, but not tainted. Before Xiao leaves Venti tells him, "he told me that he regretted never spending time with me, and then it was too late." And then he asks, "Are you the same?" Hopeful that maybe, maybe all that time he spent with Void Xiao wasn't just the influence of Abyssal Corruption. That this isn't one-sided on Venti's part in this time.

"...I would like that." Xiao admits. Because his biggest regret in the Chasm, where he thought he might die... Was that he never spent time with Venti. Never got to be the reason the other smiled, and all this time... Now? He's learning Venti felt the same.

And so they do.

[stinknoodle]

Just One Dance

Summary: Steve bumps into you after dropping Dustin off at the Snowball and decides to stop and catch up, unintentionally uprooting long forgotten feelings within the both of you.

Fic Flavor: Childhood friends to lovers(kinda), mutual pinning, mild angst

Word Count: 5,316

As Steve pulled away from the gym entrance, jaw clenched, he spotted a familiar form in the distance, one he hadn't taken in for a while. You were perched on the edge of the sidewalk, your leather jacket pulled tight around your body and a cigarette in hand. He frowned, this was an odd hour to be sitting alone outside. With recent events weighing heavily in his mind, he pulled up to park about a yard away. He'd just check up on you, maybe offer to give you a ride home, just in case. He only harbored fond memories of you and the thought of something bad happening to another person he knew made his stomach turn.

As he approached, you didn’t take notice. A skateboard, your skateboard, sat upside-down on the road, pushed against the sidewalk. The bottom was decorated and seemingly hand painted, your name in an edgy font surrounded by haphazard doodles of skulls and flowers and all sorts of other clashing designs. Your shoulders jumped slightly when you finally became aware of his presence.

"Uh- hey." He greeted awkwardly, hands clenching and unclenching at his sides.

Much to his relief, a wide grin split across your face. "Well, well, well, if it isn't King Steve, in the flesh."

He scoffed lightly at the faux title, choosing pointedly to not comment on it; the only thing he'd felt like "the king" of lately was the losers. "Glad to see you haven't changed too much, (Y/N)."

Which isn't to say you hadn't changed at all, you held yourself very differently than the last time you had really talked. You sported some new piercings and dark eye makeup that made the color of your eyes pop. A couple chains hung loosely at your belt loops and a few wrapped about your neck. The alternative style you'd taken to was starkly different to the softer, preppier one you had worn the last time he had checked, but then again that was, what, eighth grade? He tried to not be too surprised. You seemed much more comfortable in your skin now anyways; it was pleasant to see.

"What's Mr. Harrington doing out here all alone on this fine night, hm?" You tilted your head with a smirk.

He scratched the back of his neck. "Just dropping off a, uh, friend at the Snowball." It felt a little weird to call Dustin a friend, but at this point it would be weirder to call him anything but.

"Ah," You grimaced slightly, "s'that why you look like a kicked puppy?"

"What?" He snapped, a little more irritably than he had meant to, immediately regretting the tone.

Thankfully, you held your hands up in mock surrender and chuckled. "Sorry, I just saw Nancy in there and assumed. Teach me to make assumptions."

"No it's-" He sighed, dragging a hand down his face, "it's fine, I'm sorry."

You shifted a bit and leaned back on your free hand. "You are forgiven, your highness. Care to take a seat with a lowly peasant, have a smoke?" You offered up the cigarette with a friendly grin. 

He sat next to you gratefully, hesitating a moment before taking the cigarette from you and taking a long drag. The quiet between you was filled with the distant thrum of music wafting from the gym. Your shoes tapped the pavement, but there was no anxiety to the movement; it was more like you were bursting with energy that your body was hardly containing. It had always been like that with you, though you had tamped it down more in your younger years.

"Do you remember our Snowball?" You suddenly spoke up, a fond smile on your lips. You weren't looking at him, but at the hole in the thigh of your black jeans, which you were picking at with bored hands.

"Uh, kind of." He shrugged, the memory felt so distant now.

Suddenly your gaze shot up, your grin widening impossibly. "Wait, do you not remember?"

He blinked at you, brows slowly knitting together as he tried to scrounge for what you could be talking about.

You laughed easily, catching yourself on his shoulder as you leaned back from the intensity of the movement. "Holy shit, you really don't! That's fucking wild!"

"What are you talking about?" He finally relented, cheeks flushing lightly with embarrassment. You gently plucked the cigarette from his hand, taking a short pull from it before pushing the smoke through your teeth.

"Way back when, I asked you to go to the Snowball with me. You said yes." You snickered as you watched recognition slowly leak back into his face. "Then, when we got there, you completely ignored me. Didn't even dance with me once."

Guilt boiled through his stomach and up his chest, remembering vaguely with horror. "Oh, God, right. I- I'm so sorry-"

"Don't be!" You laughed again. He didn't understand, especially as you propped a warm arm up on his shoulder, looking up into the sky with a fond expression on your face. "It's kinda funny now. I mean, obviously it was absolutely devastating at the time, but now I look back at it and laugh. I mean, what did I think would happen?"

His frown deepened, confusion marking up his face. "How is that funny?"

Your smile didn't falter as you turned your gaze to him. "Just- what did I expect? You're Steve Harrington and I'm- well, I'm me." You shook your head and chuckled, lowering your gaze to your lap. You sucked in another breath of smoke and blew it out of the corner of your mouth. He didn’t miss how you used the present tense in your statement, implying that this was still a current dilemma.

Quiet fell over you once more, but this time there was a mild tension to it. Steve floundered for a way to express the thoughts in his head as he recalled that night.

"I'm sorry I did that to you, it was really shitty of me to ditch you." He spoke genuinely, picking at the sidewalk.

You glanced at him with a funny look and you shook your head. "Nah, there's no hard feelings, really. I just get it now, y'know?" You shrugged. "It's probably for the best you crushed that when you did, we would've never ended up suiting each other."

"What does that mean?" It stressed him out how casually you sold yourself short. You tapped the ashes off of the tip of the cigarette on the thick sole of your shoe and placed it into his hand in favor of toying with a safety pin on your jacket.

“I really liked you, Steve. Like, a lot.” You smiled. Before he could respond, you continued on. “But, if you had indulged me even a little, I’m certain things would have turned out much worse. You let me down arguably easily, I never would’ve survived the popularity you garnered.”

He let the words settle in for a bit before he shook his head. “I wouldn’t have let anyone give you shit.”

You smiled appreciatively, but still mirrored him with the shake of your head. “Nah, look at us. You would have been a social outcast just from being around me. It’s better like this. I’d rather us be distant than ruining everything over some stupid, shitty eighth grade break-up anyways.” You laughed.

“I guess… I just feel bad for screwing you over, even just as a friend.”

"Don't worry, Stevie. You'll find a nice girl to settle down with, make a little family, and I'll- I don't know, find someone more my speed. Things will work out one day."

He rolled the cigarette between his fingers in thought, swallowing hard. Why did that sting so badly? He hadn't thought about you like that in years and yet it hurt to be written as completely incompatible, for you to paint your respective futures without the other in them. He knew you hadn’t really talked in years, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t start again, especially with how well things were going tonight. He took one more drag before putting out the stump of the cigarette, discarding it in the street. The two of you listened to the music, a light hum starting in your throat.

"I actually did want to dance with you." He suddenly confessed. You gave him a confused look and his cheeks burned under your gaze, a hand scratching at his neck. "At the Snowball. I remember thinking that you looked really pretty and uh, I wanted to dance with you. Really badly. But I-" he coughed into his fist anxiously. "I let my friends talk me out of it. Which fucking sucks and was really rude, and even though you say it's fine I'm still sorry."

Your lips parted slightly, something unknown sparkling in your eyes. As he finished speaking, you smiled warmly and let your cheek press to his shoulder, almost like you were hiding.

"Thanks, Steve…" Your voice was softer than before.

"Yeah…" He replied, tentatively wrapping his arm around your back to softly grip your forearm on your far side. The silence rolled back in, but it was softer this time, and lasted much longer.

"I'm sorry about Nancy, by the way." You spoke quietly, hands fiddling in your lap. "I was- uh, I saw you guys kind of get into it at that dumb Halloween party. And then I saw you leave without her and Jonathan and-" you sucked in a breath, like you'd said too much. "Yeah, I'm just sorry."

He squeezed your arm lightly, swallowing the lump in his throat before replying simply with, "S'fine."

You chewed your lip for a long pause, but when the distant song changed to something slower, you suddenly sat up straight; Steve quickly missed your warmth.

"Well, I believe you owe me a dance." You grinned brightly at him and held out a hand.

He stared into your scraped up palm, bewildered at the sudden change in mood. "What?"

"Hey, it's the night of the Snowball, I'm dressed in my best,” you gestured to yourself almost sarcastically, “and you always look good,” you gestured to him, sounding a hair more sincere, “and you owe me at least one dance." You snickered and pushed yourself to your feet, offering up your hand again. "Unless, of course, you've suddenly decided you don't want to associate with undesirables."

He rolled his eyes and took your hand, albeit gently to accommodate for the scuffs there. "Stop talking like that, I'm not really that much of anything anymore, and you’re not," he scrunched his face up and shook his head, “undesirable.”

You tugged him to his feet with surprising strength, and he was mildly grateful for your thick-soled shoes; it put you at the perfect height difference, which made it easier to dance. You guided one of his hands to your waist and trailed your fingers lightly up his arm to rest on his shoulder. The two of you slowly began swaying awkwardly, a little stilted and bodies just a little too far away from each other.

You laughed sweetly, head thrown back in a way that exposed the pretty skin of your throat. "Harrington, I don't think any teachers are gonna come tell us off if we get a little closer. I didn't take you for being shy." That smirk pulled back onto your face.

He rolled his eyes, cheeks burning hot as you stepped into his space without hesitation. He released your waist and brought your joined hands above your head to give you a quick spin.

"How's that for shy, huh?" He said as his hands returned to their previous placement.

You only laughed again in response.

As you both relaxed, you slowly drifted closer and closer, as if being drawn together by an invisible string. Soon, your head was pressed to his chest, his hand released in favor of joining your other hand behind his neck. Both of his hands stayed respectfully on your waist, his chin lightly pressed to the top of your head. While you swayed, he was suddenly very glad he had decided to stop and talk to you. That reminded him, however, of the reason he'd stopped in the first place.

"(Y/N)?"

"Yeah?" Your voice was like a fluffy blanket, soft and warm.

"Why were you sitting out here alone?"

You laughed shortly, leaning up to his ear. "To be honest?" You hesitated, voice shaking with hardly contained humor, with an ever widening smile. "I ate shit while riding my skateboard around and was trying to pick the gravel out of my body, but it made me nauseous so I stopped."

"Oh my God." Steve laughed through the words, delighting in the way you hung off of him as you lost it. You hid your face in his shirt, muffling the high, hysterical sounds of your giggles.

"Do you want a ride home after this, then?"

You looked up with tears of laughter in your eyes. "I thought you'd never ask.”

Despite your protests of being okay to walk on your own, he helped you into the passenger seat of his car, giving your hands a light squeeze before drawing back to shut the door and head over to the driver's side.

"So, how's about we head over to my place to patch you up first, hm?" He spoke as he pulled onto the road. "It's pretty late, though." He added, more to himself than to you.

You chuckled, "Sure, Steve. My parents aren't home anyways, they won't even notice."

He nodded knowingly. Some things never change, and that had been one of the reasons you two had originally gotten so close in eighth grade. Neither of your parents were ever home, so you'd just walk to each other's houses after school. Sometimes just to hang out, but mostly to spend the night. It made you both feel just a bit safer, to have another body in the house with you. He realized how much he had sorely missed that feeling of security as he pulled up to his house.

"Do you… do you wanna stay the night?" He cleared his throat and tried to sound more confident than he actually was. You winced and opened your mouth to reply when he suddenly realized how charged with implications that question now was.

"Not to like- not like that, just, y'know," His voice died as he concentrated on parking the car and finally turned to look at your hesitant face, "like we used to. Obviously I have the guest room and you can say no of course you can always say no but-"

"Steve," You pressed a reassuring hand to his shoulder, "I'd love to stay the night."

He sent back a small, apologetic, and grateful smile. To be truthful, he hadn't been sleeping very well, if at all. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was those things. He heard them between every baited breath, and when his eyes slipped closed, he felt them watching. The rational part of him knew it was all over, that he was probably safe in the confines of his room, that the only creatures he had to worry about in the tender hours of the night were wild animals typical to the area, but he just couldn't shake that feeling. The feeling that he was being watched, that the worst was only yet to come, that something was waiting just beyond their sight, watching, waiting.

"Steve?" Your voice pulled him out of his spiraling thoughts, hand clenched around the cold bathroom doorknob.

"Sorry," He mumbled before twisting the handle and stepping in.

"It's fine," you stated gently, closing the toilet seat and sitting atop it while he dug through cabinets to locate the first-aid kit. "Where were you?"

"What?" He glanced up at you without turning his head.

You waved a hand, lips pursed. "You looked like you were… somewhere else. Somewhere bad."

It took a moment for him to get what you were saying, but once he did a lump formed at the back of his throat. He knelt at your feet, trying to roll up your pant legs with careful consideration for your knees.

"Nowhere, it's fine. I'm just kind of… tired." Not a lie, he felt like his limbs were made of lead.

You hummed, leaning forward to rest an elbow just above your knee and perching your chin on your hand. "This'd be easier if I was wearing shorts. You got anything I could borrow?"

He stood up, relenting and letting your pant leg drop back down to your ankle. "Yeah, I'll be back in a sec."

It was only when he had started digging through his dresser that he realized how readily he agreed to lend you his stuff, how easy you had found it to ask him to. There had been no hesitation, it almost felt natural, like it hadn’t been nearly four years since you’d even spoken a word to each other. He felt something warm in his chest, and he decided to be grateful for the comfortability that still remained between you two.

When he got back, you were picking at the open wounds on your palms, wearing a bored expression. "Stop that, you're gonna make it worse."

You looked up and gave him an award-winning smile of innocence. "Doing what? I've got no clue what you're talking about."

He tossed you the shorts and t-shirt in his hands and headed for the door. "Let me know when you're done changing."

You tilted your head curiously. "Why's there a shirt? Something wrong with mine?"

"Just figured you'd want to sleep in something other than your street clothes, you're free to just give it back." He called over his shoulder before pulling the door shut behind him.

The bathroom was nearly silent behind Steve as he leaned against the wall beside the door. He was almost nodding off when your voice suddenly sounded.

"You can come back in, pretty boy."

The pet name made his cheeks glow with blush, taking a calming breath before opening the door with indifference forced onto his face. It got even harder to keep the expression when he saw you, in his clothes, in his bathroom, staring up at him. Your street clothes were folded neatly on the edge of the sink, your socked feet lightly tapping at the tile. A smirk tugged at your lips, and you were opening your mouth to say something when he quickly ducked the statement to kneel at your feet once more.

"Christ, how were you even standing?" He lightly ghosted his fingers over the bloody gashes at your knees. He pressed his palm just above your knee and stroked the skin there with his thumb. "Why didn't you say something sooner?"

As he looked back up at you, he found your mouth still hanging open, cheeks flushed. You coughed into a fist and cast your gaze to the side. "Looks a lot worse than it actually is."

He scowled lightly. "Really?"

"Yeah, I've experienced worse." You chuckled. "Nothing will compare to when I broke my leg sophomore year." You grinned down at him, an attempt to reassure him gone wrong. "The bone was sticking out, it was pretty sick."

He looked horrified and you laughed, loud and hearty and so very you. "That's terrible."

"It's fine, really. I've recovered, obviously." You chuckled. He finally withdrew to start digging through the first-aid kit, shaking his head in disbelief as he did so. That definitely explained the massive scar on your left knee.

"Okay, here, this'll probably sting a bit, but it's important that we get them as clean as possible." He narrated as he pulled out some hydrogen peroxide. He dug around for a small hand towel and dumped some of the liquid on it.

"I'm a big kid, I'm sure I can handle it."

He shook his head again. "You can squeeze my shoulder if it hurts too bad, and we can always take breaks if you want."

Your grin turned mischievous, "Oh, yeah? You gonna take care of me?" Your flirtatious tone made his face light up like a Christmas light. He quickly pressed the cloth to your right knee.

You gasped loudly, hands flying down to squeeze at his shoulders. "Jesus Christ, Steve! A little warning would've been nice!"

He didn't respond, opting to rub your left thigh apologetically. He would've apologized out loud if he had trusted his voice to not shake. By the time he was done wiping down your knees, you had two fistfulls of his red shirt in each hand. Your makeup was running down your cheeks and neck, forcing yourself to swallow back a pained sound.

"You did such a good job, we're almost done, alright?" He spoke softly, setting down the cloth in favor of antibiotic ointment and bandages. To give you some credit, they did in fact, look a lot worse than they actually were. Still, he hadn't been expecting any reaction less than the one you’d had. 

"Give me your hands?" He asked lightly as he finished up bandaging your knees.

You gave him a hesitant look, paired with a sniffle, but extended your hands at his patient expression. He felt you relax in his grip as you realized those didn't hurt nearly as bad as your knees.

"There," He practically breathed the word out, having to clear his throat to continue, "all better."

"Gonna kiss 'em better?" He looked up into your watery grin, and he found himself having to scramble to regain his footing in the situation. He looked back down, and leaned in to press a soft kiss to each knee.

"St-Steve-" you stammered, but you choked on your words as he took your hands into his, looking into your eyes as he pressed light kisses to your palms.

Satisfied with your silence, bright red cheeks, and gaping mouth, he stood. "Better?"

"Y-yeah." Your voice trailed off, quickly glancing into your palms to trace the kisses with your eyes.

"Good, you had anything for dinner yet?"

You shook your head wordlessly, jumping a bit when his hand reached into your view.

"C'mon, I think I can whip something up for us." He didn't actually expect you to take his hand, you would probably just push it away with another hearty laugh. That's what would have made sense with what knowledge he’d gathered on you. You did no such thing, however, taking his hand and letting him pull you to your feet. He felt your hand squeeze at his lightly, lingering just a little longer than what was probably acceptable, and let go.

What was happening? Why were you both acting like this? Steve was absolutely puzzled as you started talking his ear off, it was almost as if none of that had just happened. He was only half listening as you rambled, but you didn't seem to mind his distant expression; you must have just wanted someone to talk to. The entire time all he could think about was how bizarre tonight had turned. He felt almost bad at the fluttering in his chest, but it was kind of soothing and certainly preferential to the ache that had been there earlier in the night.

After dinner, you had cleaned your makeup-smudged face off and gone your separate ways. You had patted Steve's shoulder with a splitting yawn and mumbled out a "G'night." The knowledge that you were in the house with him did less to soothe his nerves than he thought it would, less than it had when you were little. Then again, he had had less things to worry about at that time, As he laid in his bed, his eyes kept drawing back open to stare at the window. Every little sound was some nightmarish creature, every shadow was hunting him. He dragged a tired hand down his face, stretching out the heavy bags under his eyes. Suddenly, he ripped the blankets back from his body and stood, a hand quickly being pressed to his desk to steady himself. He couldn’t help but look out of the window at the pool. His stomach lurched and he forced himself to turn away, a sad attempt at shutting out the millions of thoughts spinning through his head. It’s bullshit, we killed Barb, we killed Barb, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. He tried to be quiet as he stumbled to the bathroom and splashed his face with palm-fulls of water; it took at least 30 minutes to stop himself from retching.

With any chances of sleeping officially ruined, he made his way to the kitchen. He got himself a glass of water and sipped at it morosely, trying to convince himself that he was safe. The creak of the stairs set him on edge, hand gripping at the cup. His heart pounded in his ears as the sound of something moving through the house got closer and closer until-

“Steve?” Your groggy voice immediately shattered the tension. You gave him a tired smile, your tone teasing as you continued. “You too cool for sleep, huh?”

A heavy sigh of relief tore through his chest, the inhale proceeding it shaky. “Yeah, something like that.”

“You okay? You look…” You sleepily searched for an adjective as you made your way over to him.

“Like shit?” He provided.

“Scared.” Oh. “Terrified, actually. Did something happen?” Oh.

It was humiliating how that simple question nearly brought him to tears. He liked to blame the lack of sleep for how vulnerable his body was trying to be. It took a massive amount of effort to dam up the flood of tears and the selfish explanation that came rushing in. The less of the truth you knew, the safer you would be, and he refused to be the one who put you in that kind of danger just because he couldn’t keep his shit together.

“Bad dream?” Your fingers lightly brushed the back of his bicep as you unknowingly provided a helpful excuse for him to escape with.

He nodded, teeth clenched tightly. He averted his gaze quickly to stare into the wall and attempt to blink back the tears.

You were quiet for a long beat, fingers drawing soothing patterns into his skin. You took the glass from his hand and took a sip from it. “D’you wanna build a blanket fort in the living room?” When he looked back at your face, you were grinning childishly.

“Okay, that should do it,” You groaned with a stretch as you gave one last tuck to the corner of the blanket draped over the top of your soft structure.

“You’re still really good at that; you been practicing without me?” He teased with a tired smile.

You laughed and shook your head. “Build a fort? With another man? What do you take me for?”

He let out a responding laugh, combing a hand through his hair to push it out of his face.

You grinned up at him, clearly pleased with that response. “Well, what are we waiting for?” And with that, you were crawling in through the entrance.

Steve waited for you to settle inside before heading in out of fear that he would tear the whole thing down. You were snuggled into the corner, surrounded by pillows and trying to set the flashlight up in a way that it didn't need to be held to still shine light into the makeshift cove. The fort was not as spacious as it had appeared to be, or rather, the two of you were a lot bigger than the last time you'd built a fort together, and you hadn’t accommodated for this factor. His legs ended up snug against yours as he laid next to you, your shoulder pressing into his chest.

"There." You finally let out a quiet, excited woop as you succeeded in putting up the flashlight. "Now," you turned your gaze to Steve, suddenly holding a faux air of severity, "you gonna come here or what?"

“What?” He laughed the word out, feeling the tops of his cheeks and the tips of his ears heat up at your opened, welcoming arms.

“Well,” you wiggled a bit to get more comfortable, “this is a pretty small fort, and you look pretty cold, and I’m pretty sure you’d benefit from a good snuggle.”

“You look pretty,” He grumbled out, the words a failed knee-jerk attempt at sass. Your cheeks leaked rouge and you beamed back at him.

“C’mon, I won’t make you do anything if you genuinely don’t want to, but you seriously look like you need a hug.” He was grateful that you hadn’t brought up his comment.

You were right, of course, he definitely needed a hug. The longer he stared at you in contemplation, the harder it was to resist giving in. Finally, he slid closer to you, careful to not press his entire weight into your body. Your arms wrapped around him and your hands came up to hold his head, all to pull him closer into you.

“There we go, c’mere big cat,” Your smile was evident in your voice as you gave him a tight squeeze. “Isn’t that so much better?”

He grumbled a half-hearted complaint about your fingers being cold, but his body language spoke very clearly that he was in pure bliss. His arm slid up to hold across your waist, grip a little stronger than you had expected. His other arm was pulled up against his chest, fist tucked up under his chin. Your breath ghosted over the top of his head, one hand stroking gently through his hair, picking softly and splitting apart hairsprayed strands. The other hand rubbed a line up and down his back with a firm tenderness; every careful touch pulled him into a state of calm that he hadn’t known for quite some time. A soft, embarrassing sound came from his throat as you pulled your hand away from his back and you chuckled.

“Just grabbing a blanket, s’that okay?” Your voice was somewhere between speaking and whispering.

He nodded against your chest, letting you lean up slightly to grab a blanket and he helped you pull it over your bodies. You tucked it gently up to his chin, sending a small smile down at him when he met your gaze. Your fingers were warmer than before as they slid down from his hair to gently cup his cheek, thumb brushing under his eye.

“You comfy?” You smiled brilliantly when he nodded again. “Good. Try to get some sleep, yeah? You look like shit.”

He huffed out a half-laugh and pressed his cheek back down to your chest. “Easier said than done.”

“Yeah, I get that…” You continued to stroke his hair, apologizing when one of your rings caught and tugged a strand.

Despite his snarky comment, he found himself slipping into the clutches of sleep in your arms. He could hear the rhythm of your heartbeat through your ribs underneath his ear, and he felt the rumble in your chest when you started to quietly hum. His tight grip around you slowly eased as he drifted away from the conscious world, finally letting his tired body rest.

You could feel the moment he fell asleep, could see it in the way his expression relaxed. His eyebrows finally drew up and apart, his lips parting just slightly and the softest snores started to leave through the gap. He looked very pretty like this, all relaxed and peaceful. You leaned down to press a feather-light kiss to his forehead, and eased your head back into the pillow. You squeezed him one more time, his arms unconsciously tightening around you a hair, and you let yourself finally be taken from the world by sleep as well.

[harasharaved]

Dick Grayson Fics - September 2023

Fics I recommend with a focus on or POV of Dick Grayson. Masterpost can be found here.

Key: Has a ship or romantic plot, unfinished, multi-chapter, one-shot

Without Question by Lowflyingfruit

"There is something very wrong with Dick at the moment. He's doing everything Bruce says without a hint of protest. Tim's going to get to the bottom of this."

Love this one! Tone and characterization are just great, same with pacing and build up. Excellent one-shot to read on the subway.

Touch Starved by Envysparkler

"Dick has a whole family who would rather stab him or themselves before embracing him, and he respects their boundaries, but sometimes he just wants a hug he doesn’t have to beg for."

Sweet sweet hurt/comfort! It's cute, it hurts, Dick deserves a hug.

The 70 Days After Groundhog Day by Ptelea

"There's a time loop that only Jason remembers. It acts as a catalyst for changes within the family. Some arguments, some misunderstandings, some bonding, some healing, and quite a lot of conversations that mostly take place over food."

This is a really interesting take on a time loop scenario, in which we don't get to learn what happens, but get to see the aftermath from the POV of someone who was not in the time loop. It has a Dick and Jason focus, but it has a Dick POV.

Home Is Where the Heart Is by LittleLadybugs

Six months ago, Renegade broke free from his master. He had no home. No family. Had learned nothing beyond what he'd needed to be a predator. Now free, he has vowed to use those skills to help instead of hurt. Only Nightwing really shouldn't have picked Blüdhaven for his debut. The neighbors are kinda... a lot. Like, A LOT a lot. OR Dick joins the batfam fashionably late.

I don't often rec unfinished fics, but this one is too lovely to not read anyways. The description says it all. Full of feels and Reluctant Big Brother Dick.

Bad Signal by prismatical

The rescue mission went well. Nightwing is safe. Everything should be alright. Right?

Wonderfully long fic to trade for a full nights sleep. Mind the tags on this one, but I shant say more except if you love angst, this is for you!

Birdsong by ScarlettSwordMoon

After getting a face full of Scarecrow’s newest toxin, Dick isn’t haunted by his typical nightmares. No. This one has little green pixie boots. AKA Batman: Ego but make it Robin.

EXCELLENT character study into Dick Grayson as a character. Another one to mind the tags for.

Unsteady by withthekeyisking

Dick grew up watching Bruce take countless woman to bed for the sake of the mission, and to get what he needed from different people. He watched, and he learned. And maybe he doesn't feel the same things the people around him feel, maybe he doesn't really like sex, but it doesn't really matter. Because if sex makes people happy, then why does his opinion on everything matter? It's not their fault he's broken.

Mind the tags! This one has mature themes and mentions of sex, but overall isn't graphic or NSFW. Dick figures out his identity, under some less than ideal circumstances. It's not always my HC, but I have a soft spot for aspec Dick. It explores some very real themes, and has a satisfying ending.