#anyways I'm sure these are rambles only I care about lol

[invisiblemelonmoose]

Thinking about headcanons and headcanon posts and I realized that, at least with pokémon protags and rivals, you'll probably never get an "official" gender/sexuality post from me. Not because I don't have queer headcanons, but because I constantly rotate them around in my head depending on my mood that it'd be wrong 20 mins after I posted it.

Like, when I ship Serena with Emma, they're cis wlw, but when I ship her with Calem, they're T4T straight, or she's aroace with the whole friend group pining over her.

Similar with Silver, while I generally prefer seeing him as gnc cis, I love transmasc Silver with all my heart (transfemme is allowed, but he/him pronouns exclusively).

I'll ship Lyra with most characters she interacts with or other protags, but I don't necessarily think she's bi/pan (tho I do often).

Anyways, I'm gonna try to go back to posting (mostly Kris-centric) headcanons, just don't be surprised if you don't see any of these.

[nereidprinc3ss]

do you believe me now? | 2

in which fem!reader is feeling insecure about how inexperienced she is around spencer's friends and seeks his expertise to amend the problem

series masterlist

18+ (smut) warnings/tags: inexperienced reader, oral f receiving, (MUNCH!SPENCE RETURNS), fingering, (very) insecure reader, softdom!spencer, sub reader, nipple stuff, kinda sorta implied age gap, god i'm probably forgetting things pls lmk if i missed something important a/n: i've been laboring at this bad boy every day for so long i had to immediately post once it was completed lol. there will be a part three ... maybe i already started it ..... anyway i love u guys and i hope this is a satisfactory part two!! PLS lmk if you liked it!! hearing from u makes my day :')

When Spencer dropped you off at Penelope’s apartment for your first girl’s night—the hostess had promised you, JJ, and Emily lots of gossip sans 'icky men'—you had been ecstatic. You wouldn’t stop rambling to him about how excited you were. 

When he picks you up two and a half hours later, he can hardly get a word out of you. 

It’s not his fault, of course—well, not really, anyway. It’s just that all the girls had wanted to talk about was sex. A topic on which you held very little expertise and had essentially nothing to contribute. Out of the four, you were the only non-FBI agent, the youngest, and undoubtedly the least experienced. It was like high school all over again, except you actually desperately wanted to impress Spencer’s friends. All in all, you weaseled your way out of sharing without giving away that you were still very much a virgin. Sure, you could have said ‘we did hand stuff two weeks ago’, but you had a feeling these women wouldn’t consider that very impressive. 

But you can’t easily relay that information to Spencer—even when he immediately picks up on your sullen mood. He asks you what’s wrong as you make your way down the echoey staircase, but you hold back, muttering something along the lines of we’ll talk about it later. 

Later doesn’t come on the sidewalk outside. It doesn’t come in the car, or at any point during the twenty minute drive, but you feel it rapidly approaching as you climb the stairs to Spencer’s apartment. He unlocks the door and holds it open for you, doesn’t speak as you kick off your shoes and wander aimlessly into the living room.

“Did you eat?” He finally asks, hanging his keys on a hook by the door and glancing over to where you linger in the center of the room like a ghost. 

“Not hungry.”

You both know that wasn’t the question, but he lets it go. 

“Alright... well, I was thinking—“

“Why haven’t we had sex?”

The question flies from your mouth before you can stop it. It tastes like metal and you wish you could take it back as you stand there, cheeks hot and awaiting a reply. It seems you’ve thoroughly astonished Spencer as he gapes at you like a fish out of water for several silent moments, eventually opting to shove his hands in his pockets and shake his head at the wall as he processes the question. 

“I… I don’t know. We just haven’t. Does that bother you?”

Suddenly your whole body feels intolerably warm. Your fingers twitch against your thighs. Of course it bothers you. 

“Do you just not want to? You aren’t attracted to me like that?”

God, you despise how fragile your voice sounds—how much you obviously care, how insecure you clearly are. Spencer picks up on it, despite your most fervent wishing that he wouldn’t, and approaches, stopping a few feet away. You stare at the span of oriental design on the floor between your feet. 

“That’s not at all what I said, angel. I wish you wouldn’t put words in my mouth.”

“Well, then… say something else,” you plead quietly, childishly, still unable to meet his eyes. Prove me wrong. 

He sighs, which does not bode well for you. You wonder if you accidentally triggered the early demise of your relationship and christ do you wish you could rewind. When he steps closer, when his hands find your arms, you’re not sure where to look. But the low, sweet tone of his voice entices you to finally meet his gaze, charmed like a snake as his eyes dart between yours. 

“You know that’s not how I feel.”

You shake your head earnestly, looking up at him with wide eyes as he slowly rubs your arms. 

“No. No, I don’t know that.”

Spencer frowns, glancing at your lips as he speaks. It’s impossible to not do the same when he’s standing so close. 

“But I’ve told you. I don’t understand how you couldn’t know how far from the truth that is.”

You think back to two weeks ago—the first and only time he’d ever done anything more than kiss you. A different kind of flush replaces the shameful one in your cheeks as you try to make your case and not get distracted by the memories of his hands all over you.

“So why won’t you prove it?”

It’d been intended to come out cool, but instead you sound a little desperate, a little out of breath as you realize you and Spencer somehow ended up so close to each other you can feel the warmth radiating from his body. 

“Is that what you need from me? More proof?”

He speaks so lowly, his fingers press into the flesh of your arms portentously, and you think maybe you’ve poked the bear one too many times. But you won’t back down now—not when you think you might actually get what you want. 

So you look up at him and nod, throat too dry to speak. His eyes are deceptively soft, but you don’t miss the big bad something lurking just beneath the surface of the placid hazel. 

“And how do you think I should prove it?”

“I told you what I want,” you whisper, speaking above your pounding heart. 

“Not tonight, honey. Choose something else.”

“Well—that’s not fair,” you stammer, “the whole point is for you to want to have sex with me.”

Spencer smiles a little, tucking hair behind your ear. “I do want that. I promise you I do. But there are other things I want us to do first.”

“Then I want to do that, too! I just—I don’t know what I’m doing, and you do, and I’m already out on a limb by asking for this much. I know this is what I want but I need you to take the lead here. I trust you, Spencer.” You top off the monologue with an imploring gaze—hoping it delivers even a fraction of the impact that his puppy-dog eyes always have on you. 

He seems to study every square inch of your face as you wait in suspense for him to say something. At long last, his lips part—to no avail for several more seconds as he regards you. 

When the words finally do come, they’re an immense relief of pressure. 

“You’re going to promise me that you’ll communicate honestly. That means telling me if we need to slow down or stop, or if you don’t like something—”

“I promise,” you say, perhaps over-eagerly, offering him your extended little finger. 

An incredulous smile narrows his eyes. 

“Is this a pinky-promise?”

“It is.” You wiggle the finger in emphasis, and he shakes his head, smiling wider as you link pinkies. 

“I left you with Garcia for far too long.”

You shush him, disentangling your hands to cup his jaw and press your lips to his. It’s sweet and smiley until it isn’t—until everything slows down like sticky molasses and his hand is ghosting over your cheek, your neck, the curve of your waist, finally substantiating itself on your hip—the other encouraging you to tilt your head back as he deepens the kiss and you feel yourself melting under the heat of his touch. 

The pressure of his body against yours builds until you’re forced to take a step back, and then another, and another. Without question you allow yourself to be herded toward the bedroom, walked slowly backward as he keeps kissing you and blindly trusting he’ll make sure you don’t run in to anything. The bedroom door clicks shut behind him, and it is in all practicality a pointless gesture—but you find it incredibly comforting nonetheless.  

It’s too warm beneath your sweater and his hands are cool as they slip under the hem, sliding against the curve of your hip. Spencer’s never seen you without a shirt, you realize, as he pulls away from the kiss by only centimeters.  

“Off?” he mutters, thumbing at the knit fabric. And while you’re far from confident, you’ve certainly been making progress in this area. You help him tug it over your head without a word, noting a distinct and surprising lack of terror within yourself as you watch for his reaction to you. Hands glide slowly up your waist and you find yourself enchanted by the slight furrow of his brow, the parting of his lips. He traces down the lacy edge of your bra, skimming sensitive skin as he goes. 

“Pretty,” he murmurs. “You’re… so pretty.”

It seems you’ve rendered him uncharacteristically prosaic. The reaction might be underwhelming if it were anyone else—but Spencer Reid is a man who probably knows every synonym for pretty in the English language. Looking at you, he can’t think of a single one. In an odd way, it’s the highest compliment he could pay you. Your cheeks heat and your stomach flips as he drags a knuckle up the center of the cup, and you can feel it through the layers of lace and fabric. He leans forward, ghosting his lips over yours and continuing to run his fingers over the sensitive spot. “Do you know how pretty you are?”

This is one argument you will not be winning—one he’ll keep bringing up at the most inopportune times until he gets his way. 

“Spencer…”

“Don’t Spencer me. I’m asking you a question.”

The words don’t seem nearly as harsh as they really are when they’re delivered velvet-soft, with his lips and hands on you—when he’s so deftly popping the button on your jeans and dragging the zipper down with all the quickness of a slight-of-hand. It makes it hard to focus, even harder to speak. 

“We have… we have differing views on this matter.”

Generous handfuls of your hips and ass are taken as he helps you tug down your jeans before you kick them off, now left just in your underwear. 

“I thought I argued my point fairly well last time you were here. You didn’t learn anything from that?”

“Mm… maybe you just need to remind me.”

“Oh, I think I have to,” he agrees through a smile you can only hear. Gentle fingers skim up your back and tap the clasp of your bra. “How about this? Can we take this off?”

Any confidence from earlier crumbles and you loose a nervous hum—which is not the enthusiastic yes you’re sure Spencer will be seeking all evening. He pulls away, features etched with the beginnings of concern and a searching gaze. Asking would be unnecessary; the words simply come tumbling out of you. 

“What if you don’t like how I look?”

Spencer doesn’t even blink.

“That’s not going to happen.”

How you wish you could have the same assuredness in yourself that he seems to. 

“But what if… what if you’ve been with other girls who are more, like—I don’t know, just—better? Prettier?”

“Honey, you’re—” a sigh, a pause as he searches for the words—his eyes dart up and down your form, assessing, and when he looks back up at you, they’ve cleared and softened. He pulls you a little closer, rubbing circles into your back with his thumb. “I’m not thinking about anyone else right now. I’m not interested in anyone else right now. I already think you’re perfect, and I’m going to keep thinking that regardless of how you look. When I look at you, I’m not looking for things to critique. Do you understand me?”

As far as sentiments go, it’s a nice one. But the pressure of being seen still feels like an impossible burden. You whine, leaning your head against Spencer’s chest. He accepts your weight and runs his hand over your back as you look up at him. 

“But what if I’m hideously deformed?”

His eyebrows raise. 

“You’re not.”

“But what if I am?”

“Okay. It seems like you don’t feel ready yet, which is completely fine, we just won’t—”

“No!” you protest. “I am ready. I am. But… you have to promise to be nice to me no matter what. Or break up with me if you don’t like what you see so I don't have to wonder.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he says, kissing you, “and the only thing I’m willing to promise is that I’ll think you’re perfect. Me being nice will come as a natural byproduct of that which is very different than being nice by artifice. Take it or leave it.”

A moment of hesitance—but it’s short-lived. This is more important than your insecurities. Spencer is more important. 

“Take it,” you mumble against his lips. His fingers trace up the smooth skin of your back, all the way to the fabric and metal hooks on your bra. 

“Thank you.”

You wouldn’t have thought Spencer’s genius would manifest in being really good at undoing the clasp of a bra, but you can truly say you’re impressed by the ease with which he does it. It falls to the floor, leaving you completely shirtless for the first time in front of him. 

“Well?” you murmur, arms crossed defensively underneath your chest, because you understand overtop would sort of ruin the whole thing. “What’s the verdict?”

“You,” Spencer manages after a moment—you literally watch him memorizing every square inch of your body— “are ridiculously beautiful.”

The way his voice gets quieter makes your stomach flip. It sounds genuine. Too genuine to be faked. 

“So… no breakup?”

It seems that the more vulnerable you feel, the less likely you are to take a compliment. Spencer, who is always seeking patterns, probably recognizes this one, and doesn’t push you so hard this time. After a silent moment, he sighs and cradles your face in his hands. 

“You’re gorgeous. I hate how incapable you are of seeing that. We’re going to talk about this.”

“Yeah, but not right now, right?” you murmur, standing up on your tiptoes to kiss him. 

“Not right now,” he agrees. 

His lips are so soft and gentle against your own it feels like love, it feels like being talked down from the ledge of your own insanity. Somehow the way he strokes your hip feels more nurturing than sexual. It’s like he has sex and chaste affection on tap, able to turn them on and off at will. You’re happy to drown in either. Ideally, both.

After a while, his hands begin roaming farther, become bolder in their excursions over your flesh. Up, down, over your waist and ribs. Clearly Spencer had been trying to ease you into it, but you still can’t hide your sharp inhalation when his thumbs graze the sensitive skin of your breasts. He pulls his lips from yours, hands splayed over your sides. 

“Sit down.”

It’s much too gentle to be a command, but you frown. 

“Without you?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he chuckles, lightly squeezing your waist. “Just sit. Utilize patience.”

You sit on the edge of the bed with an atypical reticence—you’re just a little too nervous for a snippy comeback. Spencer picks up on this, features softening sympathetically as he undoes his tie with nimble fingers. It lands somewhere on the bed and he leans over you, resting his weight on his fists and offering you a quick kiss. His voice is soft and designed to soothe as he speaks, mere inches away from your face, and so quiet it could only be heard at this range. 

“Are you nervous?” Cloth from the duvet pinches between your fingers. For a moment you don’t reply, dropping your head to watch when Spencer runs his hand over your thigh. “It’s okay if you’re feeling anxious, baby. We don’t have to do anything tonight.”

You expel a frustrated huff. 

“I want to. Just because I’m nervous doesn’t mean I don’t want this. I can handle a little bit of anxiety.”

He hums, dropping to a crouch and inserting himself directly in your line of sight. 

“I know you can. But you don’t always have to push yourself so hard.”

“I’m fine pushing myself a little. I pinky-promised I would tell you if I wanted to stop, remember?”

“Oh, how could I forget a pinky-promise?” he smiles. 

How could you forget anything, you think, becoming flushed and silently insolent at his dulcet teasing. 

“Please, do something.” It’s a whisper, brushing his lips as you lean down until you’re nose to nose. His hands are on the back of your legs. 

“I’m working on it.”

“It doesn’t look like it.”

“You’re smart, angel. Tell me why I've got you naked on my bed and I’m kneeling in front of you. Where could I possibly be taking this?”

Oh, you have a pretty strong inkling—but you’re scared to voice it and be wrong. Instead of risking it you shake your head slowly, shyly. What you’re not expecting is for Spencer to duck his head down, slide his hands up the side of your thighs and press kisses to the delicate skin there. It feels good—better than you’d have thought. 

“You don’t know?” he asks, looking up at you through burnished gold-rimmed pupils. “No guesses?”

“No guesses,” you agree breathlessly, hotter than you were when you had your clothes on and all the energy in your body condensed into one point between your legs. Spencer hums like he’s considering your answer, smoothing his thumbs over the soft skin of your thighs so gently it feels like burning. 

“I don’t think you’re being entirely truthful. Lie back, sweetheart.”

You do as you’re told, scooting up on the mattress and falling back on your elbows. Spencer wastes no time in climbing over you, leaving you in much the same position as the last time you’d been in his bed. The sheets feel cool against your bare skin, but he is exceptionally warm and solid over you. 

“I’m being honest.” Lie. “I don’t know what you’re going to do.”

Lips find the most sensitive spot of your neck, dancing over it torturously. The front of his shirt brushes your chest. Your thighs clamp together. 

“I don't like being lied to. Just say it, baby. I know you know.”

“Spencer,” you whine, fists bunching the excess fabric around his waist. Warm breath condensates on the skin of your neck as he chuckles. 

“You don’t like being teased, huh?”

“Please, Spence,” you whisper. You notice the pattern of his breathing pause momentarily before it all comes rushing out at once—and you catalogue that particular plea for later usage. 

“I can’t say no when you ask me like that.”

You push your fingers into his soft hair. 

“I know.”

It was a lucky guess. 

He’s still for a moment, relishing the feeling of your hands in his hair, before darting up to kiss you. 

“I’m going to use my mouth this time,” he murmurs against your lips. Though you knew that was what he intended, your heart stumbles in its perpetual march. “Is that okay?”

“What if I…”

You trail off. This is a very intimate situation which you’re not quite sure you have delicate enough language for. Or maybe you’re just stalling. Either way, Spencer is eternally patient with you. 

“You need to stop worrying so much, pretty girl. I’d love to do this for you. But it’s your call.”

“Love is a pretty strong word.”

“Sometimes I think not strong enough.”

The way he’s looking down at you so tenderly, brushing hair from your face, makes you think maybe he’s not just talking about how much he would love to go down on you. Regardless, it fortifies your trust in him. Spencer is the kindest person you know. He’s so clearly an enthusiastic giver. Why not allow him to give you this? 

“Okay,” you breathe. “You can—yeah.”

As usual, you’re impressively awkward, but he doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, you think he not-so-secretly delights in being the one to fluster instead of the other way around. Rarely has he mentioned his past romantic and sexual exploits, but gathering bits and pieces, you assume he was a fairly late bloomer. He probably knows what it’s like to be nervous and so deeply unsure of yourself. 

“Do you remember what you promised me?” he whispers, pressing butterfly-light kisses to your jaw. Your eyes flutter shut as his lips traverse down your neck, teeth skimming over the delicate skin while your breath catches. 

“Mhm.”

“You’re not gonna break that promise, are you?”

His voice, soft and muffled by your skin, is the most exhilarating and disorienting high. Your entire body buzzes with anticipation, satisfied only where his lips soothe and his body presses against yours. It takes a moment for you to remember to reply. 

“No.”

Reward comes in the form of his thumb brushing over the peak of your breast at the same time as he murmurs, “good girl.”

Your stomach flips at the endearment—you squeak and arch into him slightly. Spencer’s hand slides down your ribs as he chuckles, lips pressed just above your collarbone. 

“You’ve never called me that before,” you shudder as he continues kissing over your neck. 

“It’s not appropriate in most conversational contexts. But I can tell you’ve always been good.”

“Really? How?”

Spencer pauses, pushing himself up to regard you with searching eyes. The places he’d kissed feel cold without him. 

“I just can. You’re thinking too much, baby. I need your focus on me.”

“It is on you,” you huff. 

You watch his expression shift minutely. He loves games. Of course he’d love playing with you. That knowledge is why you’re only partially surprised when his thumb catches on your nipple again. 

“Is it? You’re only thinking about how it feels when I touch you here?”

A stammering nod. 

He toys with the sensitive flesh only a second more, amusement lighting his eyes, before dragging his hand down, down, down until it’s between your legs. Fingers trail over your clothed core, skimming the most sensitive part of you while your breath hitches.  

“Tell me how it feels when I touch you here.”

“Really good,” you admit, a heavy exhale escaping parted lips as he pins you with his gaze. 

“Really good, right. I can make it feel even better. Do you want me to make it feel better?”

Your thighs drop fully open and he adds just a bit more pressure until you’re pushing against his hand in search of more friction. 

“Yes please.”

“Then no more questions. I need you to trust me.”

Your answer is a breathy, dreamy sigh—you’d do anything, say anything for him. 

“Okay.”

Spencer kisses you, absorbing your noises of protest as his hand ceases between your legs and settles on your hip. But you’re trusting him. No whiny complaining. No unnecessary questions. 

Things go much quicker once you’re not interrupting him every twenty seconds to say something. His lips reattach to your neck, retracing their path (albeit quicker) until he’s below your collarbone. You watch in rapt fascination, twisted brows and parted lips as he peppers kisses down over your breast before dragging his tongue over your nipple. A jolted little moan spills out because you hadn’t been prepared to hold one in. Waves of hair fall over Spencer’s face, obscuring him from your vision, but you don’t think to push it away—your body is too busy processing the sensation to be much use on any other front. He darts his tongue over the peaked flesh, eliciting more little open-mouthed exhalations of pleasure from you. Earlier you hadn’t really thought it necessary for your bra to come off—you had no idea this could actually feel so good. A moment later he begins toying with the other nipple and you gasp as a bolt of heat goes straight to your core. 

You curse, further words catching in your throat as he suddenly switches, mouthing at your other breast and letting the cold air chill the other until you have goosebumps. It feels a little like hypnosis—you’re unable to move or speak as his tongue laves over you. Soon he’s replacing his mouth with a thumb again, sucking a mark onto your tit just above your nipple. You whimper a little at the pleasant brutality of it, hoping as he releases that it won’t soon fade. Spencer swipes over the stinging skin and presses a tender kiss to it, almost like an apology—but you sincerely doubt he’s actually sorry. 

Then he resumes his descent, leaving soft kisses down between your breasts, over your ribcage and stomach—when he reaches your hips, he doesn’t pull off your underwear all at once. Rather, he slides the fabric down centimeter by centimeter, kissing the revealed skin like it’s precious. 

This time you don’t need to be told to lift your hips. He helps you slip the final piece of clothing down and off of your legs, flinging it somewhere blindly before getting comfortable between your thighs once more. Your heart pounds with arousal and anxiety as his arms wrap around your thighs and his hands rub up and down the tops of them slowly. 

“God, you’re fucking beautiful,” he mumbles, loosening his hold on one leg to thumb at your folds. They glisten in the dim light of his bedroom as he gently reveals your clit. A soft whine escapes you when he nudges at the aching bud, slipping over it a few times and alleviating a bit of the pressure that’s been building. “Shh, baby. I know. I’m gonna take care of it. You’re being so good for me.”

Fuck. The way he talks to you makes your brain turn to mush—you’re utterly incapable of forming an intelligent thought. Spencer has rendered you a complete idiot, and you’re not upset about it in the slightest. 

He presses more gentle kisses to the creases between your thighs, just above your clit—everywhere except for where you need him most. Everything aches for him in the best way and at least you’re too turned on to be very insecure anymore. All you want is relief. But you’re trusting him. 

Thankfully, he delivers. 

The tip of his tongue grazes so lightly over your clit that if you weren’t this worked up you may not have felt it at all. In your current state, however, the stimulation echoes through every atom of your being. Every muscle is tense, frozen in place—you can’t even breathe for a second. He does it again, a little flatter, with a little more pressure, and you whimper. It’s a delicate thing, almost pained and definitely overwhelmed as he gently begins working his tongue against you. Your head cranes up to watch, your jaw drops. Approximations of curse words try to form, but come out only as, “f-fu—oh,” so whiny and soft it doesn’t even sound like you. He hums sympathetically, but you suspect it morphs into a chuckle as you continue to gasp and mewl. 

There are times where you can hold back sounds of pleasure. When you’re by yourself, it’s typically not a problem. Two weeks ago when Spencer was knuckle deep in you for the first time, it had certainly been a challenge, and you’d pretty much given up. But this—this is something else entirely. It feels like religion. It feels like compulsion. Even if you had the slightest modicum of control over yourself, which you currently don’t, you wouldn’t want to keep quiet. You want him to know what he’s doing to you. 

So you let every cry, every whine and whimper drag from your lungs, unbidden and unshaped. You’re new at this, after all—every broad lick feels so good that you have no fucking idea what do to with your hands or how to stop rolling your hips or how to censor your sounds. 

“Spencer,” you keen in one of the moments you remember to breathe. He moans against you, taking you into his mouth and sucking lightly. Your hips buck. “Oh, my—fuck!”

The hand that’s still around your thigh rubs soothing lines up and down. The one that’s spreading you open pulls your folds apart a little bit further, granting him more access to your clit. He flicks his tongue and you almost come then and there, vision going gray for a split second. 

“Wait, wait, Spence—“ you squeak, writhing and trying not to squeeze your thighs together for fear of hurting him. He pulls back and looks up at you, lips shining with your slick and eyes glazed with lust. Fuckfuckfuck he looks so fucking good. “Please, just… slow down, or I’m gonna… or it’s gonna be over.”

The corner of his mouth twitches as he rubs circles into your inner thigh. 

“It’s over when you say it’s over. You don’t have a refractory period. We don’t have to stop at one.”

“Oh—you don’t—you don’t have to do that,” you stammer. 

“I know I don’t have to. But if you want me to, I want to. You taste so good, angel girl.”

Well, shit. 

He looks absurdly sexy between your legs like this. You have no idea how you got so lucky, but you don’t plan on taking it for granted. Your fingers tangle in his hair. 

“I don’t know if I can do more than one,” you admit shyly, slightly embarrassed by how little you know about yourself and in general compared to Spencer. Hazel eyes sparkle in the warm light. 

“How about we start with one and see how it feels?”

Your voice is breathy when you respond, “okay,” already impatient for him to get back to it. Spencer seems just as eager, immediately kissing between your legs with a passion that makes your lips jealous. 

The flat of his tongue presses circles against you and your hips buck, already ramping up to that point you’d been at before calling a time-out. Slowly his fingers find their way to your entrance and he teases you with them, dipping in to the first knuckle before withdrawing again. If you could form words, you’d beg him to just do it already, but all you can manage is an affronted whine as you tilt your hips down, hoping he catches the meaning. 

Of course he does—pushing two fingers inside you at once. The intrusive stretch adds a sharp edge to the pleasure, makes it more interesting, as your brain short-circuits and you choke out a moan. It only takes a few slow pumps of his fingers in tandem with the pressure of his tongue until your hips are writhing and you’re and mewling desperately, more overwhelmed with pleasure than you’ve ever been. You push his hair back, able to see him for the first time, and fully appreciate the hollow of his cheeks, the way he looks up at you with perfect, glassy half-lidded eyes, the rhythm of his hand and tongue—he takes your clit between his lips once more, sucking lightly, and you’re done for. A pornographic sob escapes from deep within you as you come, but he doesn’t stop. The orgasm lasts longer than you knew one could—although, it’s only your second time, so you don’t exactly have a lot of data to go off of. Your entire body feels warm and floaty, and what he’s doing feels so good you want him even deeper—but you know he won’t give you that yet. Instead you focus on the slow burn of your orgasm, allowing him to carry on for a while until you begin slowly drifting back to earth and it becomes a bit too much. He recognizes the barely-there whine for what it is and pulls his fingers from you carefully, pressing one final kiss to your clit that makes your legs twitch and summons a weak little moan. 

Spencer’s lips find other avenues, over the delicate skin of your thighs and hips and stomach as he slowly drags himself up again. By the time you’re face to face again you’re still breathing hard. You sort of feel like prey underneath his weight, studied so scrupulously, known far more intimately by him than anyone has ever known you before. But there is so much light and kindness in the way he looks at you that you almost can’t make sense of it. 

Maybe it’s possible to be known and still wanted. The possibility spins like a coin on its edge in your mind. An idea you spent so much time trying to nurture and is only just now beginning to sprout. Maybe someone could see you at your most vulnerable, and still find you worthy of kindness. Appreciation. Affection. 

Spencer certainly could, it seems, as he ducks down to kiss you. You dodge it, turning your head demurely. He nudges his head against yours, speaking so, so softly, utterly cloying as he teases, “what? You’re not gonna kiss me now? Is that how it is?”

“No!” you balk, equally as quiet and especially bashful. “Not when you… no.”

“Let me kiss you,” he pleads, so earnestly you turn your head back to face him. His big eyes are hazy, reflecting all the warmth and dizziness you feel. “Let me kiss you. Please.”

You whine.

“I don’t wanna… taste… myself.”

Spencer doesn’t miss a beat. 

“Hm. We’ll need to work on that. Because one day, I’ll make you come just like that again, and then I’m going to fuck you, and you’re really going to want me to kiss you then, angel.”

Something flickers in your core. 

Suddenly you’re not so squeamish. You really want him to kiss you now. But it seems he’s going to have his fun, first. 

“Open.” Without even thinking about it, your lips part. He really ought to be careful with what he tells you to do—you’re all too compliant. Even as his fingers slip between your lips, you’re obediently hollowing your cheeks around them, watching him with big eyes as his own mouth falls slightly open. “Oh, baby,” he croons. “What are we gonna do with you?”

That flicker has returned to a full-fledged throbbing once you open your mouth again, slightly dizzy from lack of oxygen. 

“Can you make me come again right now?” you whisper, grasping lightly at his shirt. He grins like he loves the idea—and you let him have his way, accepting his lips on yours with no complaint. After a few moments, (the taste is surprisingly unobtrusive), he pulls away.

“I would love to.”

-

part three

[mayordea]

Happy birthday to the number one princess in the world!! 💖

~from her biggest fans :)

ramble of my scattered thoughts on the piece under cut as usual cuz i love talking 😋

This has been an idea I've been cookin for a while, and it was so cluttered and unlike any other ensemble piece I've made... and I decided I oughta do it anyway. I love Miku, I love Vocaloid, and I wanted to do something really ambitious and crazy for her anniversary. Crazy that she's turning her "canon" age this year TwT

I had the idea floating around since like, May...? And then finally started acting on it around June 18. I'm terrible with deadlines, obvious with how I can never make a silly birthday post in time, so I started wayyyy ahead to make sure I have some room to be lazy lol, especially with an idea as ambitious as this.

This was finished on July 12! So I had to sit on this for an annoying amount of time. Very difficult for someone like me who just wants to talk about everything I'm working on to the masses. But at the very least, that gave me the time to work on the draft for this post.

~~~

Here's some ~behind the scenes~ scribbles leading up to the finished piece!

Left is the chicken scratch plan i made in my handy dandy notebook (whenever things are getting real and ambitious, i always made a rough ROUGH plan in there. Usually I'd do a rough pass of the full thing, but this was too complicated for me to do traditionally. I majorly benefited from digital tools to make this possible). CyberDiva and CyberSongman were considered, but I ended up cutting them cuz I just didn't feel like drawing them sorry-- (just pretend they're off to the side. They gave Ruby and Clara the pizza lol). Right is the "final" completed sketch (before I decided to include Chika mid-way through coloring and VY1 and VY2 near the finish line). I started by drawing the main "groups" separated on a different canvas so I can plop them into the main canvas for easy rearranging and transforming. However I got lazy and ended up drawing everyone in the bottom right corner directly on the canvas since I liked seeing the big picture of everyone's positions. Y'know.

Almost excluded Chika! But I like her design so much that I just felt like including her last-minute. You win this time, Chika fans. VY1 and VY2 were very close to being cut! I added them when I began doing the banner and thought "eh why not". I figured their non-human designs would be pretty easy to include pushed back in the bg. Ik VY1 is more commonly associated with the fan design, but I referenced the hairpin cuz it was simpler and the fan looked very annoying to draw 😭

Sorry to the fans of many Vocaloids I had to cut because this composition was insane enough as is. I promise I wanted to include fellas like CUL, LUMi and Sachiko 😭 I will admit I was a little biased on who I wanted to include over others. Like, I don't normally care for Bruno and Clara, but I wanted to get some more international 'loids in the mix. Also wanted to stick in the realm of official designs and not fan-designs since, as much as I can appreciate those, are just a whole "wait who is that guy supposed to be" situation I didn't wanna deal with. I also did wanna include even more character references through the balloons, but they ended up being kind of ugly and overcomplicated the BG :,) (Oh, and while this was originally planned to be a Vocaloid-only piece, I did end up including Teto, Neru, and Haku 'cuz those are Miku's besties dude!!! They may not be Officially in the club but they're her girls and it would be criminal to not invite them to her birthday).

Anyway, this project marks the first time I've drawn a lot of Vocaloids. Lily, Piko, Rana, Yuki, Yukari, Miki, Maika, and many more lol. All of 'em I've heard or seen in passing, but now I actually drew them, and some have really cool and fun designs!! I got into a habit of drawing Merli after this since I just love her design for example. And I'll probably be drawing more lol!!

Oh and the last thing I'll add for now!! The cake is indeed made up of various song references!! I wanted to reference the "big four" producers, just absolute icons in Vocaloid history. The pink/black checkerboard is "World is Mine" (Ryo), the crescents on the side is "Rolling Girl" (Wowaka), the smiley faces is "Matryoshka" (Hachi), and the three hearts on the side is "The Vampire" (DECO*27, which is sort of a symbol of his whole Mannequin album tbh). I know "The Vampire" is a bit modern but I couldn't think of anything else off the top of my head. I'm a fake DECO fan I know 😔 "Matryoshka" was originally going to be referenced in the colors of the candles but believe me it looked like shit so I just went for something else last minute 😭

That's all I have to say!!! Hope you didn't mind the text wall if you made it here. I hope you like it as much as I do!!!! Happy freakin' birthday Miku!!!!

I have to deal with tagging all these characters now for my page,,, in the drafts my tags got cut off after a certain point so I think I'm massively breaching the tag limit 😭 um... I'll figure that out later...

not losing sleep that i can't tag everyone, even for page organization purposes because some characters have pretty generic names and some are a little hard to see in full yknow. If you're one of those people who tag every character in the art piece you reblog... I am very sorry.

[starlightandfairies]

Helloooo :) i hope you’re having a wonderful day or night! Or just both lol. Anyways, is it okay if I ask for a Klaus Mikaelson x Female reader one-shot? For me, I don’t like where the reader just falls in love with him so quickly, despite everything he has done. I was thinking of something with fluff and he has to work for her love? So basically, reader has been friends with Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline since childhood, but she’s still human. And she hates Klaus for what he has done to her friends and family, but despite everything he has done he hasn’t don’t anything to harm her physically in any way. (Hint hint, cause it means he likes her lol). And because of this, he tries to show he genuinely cares about her. It takes her a long while to eventually warm up to him.

Sorry, this is a lot -_-…uh, and not very detailed lol. I wanted to leave it up to your imagination, but totally fine if you can’t cause writers block and other things. Anyway, an idea: maybe reader gets saved by Klaus and he admits he likes her but she kinda plays hard to get. of course, she can’t help but to be flattered by his accent, his flattery, his looks, etc. And because she is human, being tortured or just kidnapped by supernatural beings is genuinely terrifying and he comforts her? I hope this is all okay! Of course you can change or add whatever you’d like. I love Klaus so much, and I love your writing!

Description: If the great Niklaus Mikaelson wants to become closer to the reader then he would have to push through thick and thin to do so.

Warnings: she/her pronouns, fluff, swearing

*Requests are open, please send through as many requests as you want, check my character list and requesting rules.*

Thank you for requesting this! I hope you enjoy it! I really tried my best to show this eventual bonding that is more realistic, while also not rambling on for a story length.

Key: Y/N = Your Name, L/N = Last name, POV = Point of view, F/fs = favourite flowers

Word Count: 1, 915

First Person's POV 

Niklaus Mikaelson drove me insane, I do not understand how he thought he could follow me around, begging for my interest like he hasn't done anything wrong to those around him. The great Klaus Mikaelson was many things but he wasn't the type of man I would bend over backwards to show that their past didn't matter. I won't lie, there were times when it was hard to really show my distaste for the Hybrid due to that accent, his looks and his charisma but I do like to pride myself on my stubbornness and the fact that I'm not that easy to charm. 

Besides Matt, I was the only other human, sure Bonnie was in a sense human but she had her magic to protect her and I had nothing. I didn't have any of that. I was just a straight-up human who could die at any second or become permanently injured if tossed around too harshly. The girls have grown to somewhat like him and every now and again will remind me of the fact that not once has he ever tried to hurt me, not once has he ever used me as bait or tried threatening me in any way shape or form.

Bonnie, Caroline and Elena have all expressed their hatred for the man and it only fueled mine. I have no clue what it would take for me to show any sign of sympathy for the man or any sense of forgiveness considering what he's done. There were times when I even disliked Damon and Stefan for what they've done. Sure, it might be contractionary of me to like the Salvatores and not hate them like I did Klaus... but still. 

It's at least been a good two years of having the Mikaelsons in our lives. Rebekah and Elijah were tolerable. I felt for Rebekah and Elijah seemed true to his word, even if he was sometimes conflicted between his family and his morals. Klaus was 

"Hey, Y/n!" I huffed, stopping in my tracks, knowing there was no use in continuing on when he could easily Casper the ghost right in front of me. I crossed my arms over my chest, raising an eyebrow, not impressed by his persistent attitude. 

"What do you want Niklaus? 

"Well, love... I was hoping I could treat you to some dinner. Show you some of the best places. Things you couldn't possibly comprehend seeing." I rolled my eyes, shook my head, sucked my lips into a straight line and raised an eyebrow.

"Really, Niklaus? Every time it's been a no. What makes you think this will be a yes?" 

"I saw your play last night, I think you are a pretty amazing actress." I didn't believe him, I think that he's making stuff up, trying to show that he's a good guy. 

"Prove it, what happened when the actor playing Stanley threw his chair." Klaus chuckled lightly, licking his lips for a moment before he walked closer and leaned in for a moment. 

"You tripped over your own feet, fell over... you worked it into your performance, no one in that audience would've known any different. I think skill like that is pretty talented. I have seen many performers across my lifetime and not many could do that." I rocked on my feet, biting my lips and huffing for a moment. 

"You came to my performance?" I questioned my tone soft for a moment, surprised that Klaus came. The girls weren't able to due to supernatural issues happening again, I didn't want to show any sign of falling for his charm.

"Yes, I did. I don't know why you sound so surprised..." I shrugged, taking a breath, glancing away for a moment trying to remain as stoic as I could.  

"I have to go, goodbye, Klaus." I carried on my way, going back to doing what I originally planned on doing before. Tonight was the closing night of A Streetcar Named Desire the girls were meant to show but once again due to the new big bad in town, they didn't show. I stood in my dressing room, wiping off my makeup before the tears could come. I was just about to open the door before I was stopped by Klaus.

"K-Klaus... what, what are you doing here?" He handed me a bouquet of my F/fs, I took them with a small smile and stepped aside to allow him into the dressing room. 

"You got your own dressing room, that's pretty neat..." The Hybrid trailed off, glancing at the desk that was covered in tissues, I moved to clean them up but he moved in front of me before I could. 

"Why are you crying...?" 

"I'm okay Niklaus." I turned to him hearing his chuckle, I raised an eyebrow in question, how dare he laugh at me!

"I promise, I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at the fact that when I'm getting closer to breaking down your walls, you call me Klaus but when you realise that you're dropping your walls you go right back to calling me Niklaus." I sat back down, staring at him surprised that he picked up on something that I hadn't actively been aware of doing. 

"My friends couldn't come. They promised that they would but because of the new big bad in town... they couldn't and because I'm human-" Realising I was sharing my than I would like to Klaus, I bit my lip trying to remind myself that I couldn't get close to Klaus. 

"Let me read you something." He pulled out a newspaper, I gave him the benefit of the doubt, just for once but turned my attention to continuing to remove my makeup. 

"Y/n L/n's performance as Blanche DuBois has been spectacular on all nights of the production. In my years as a critic, I have never seen this much dedication and accuracy similar to the vision Tennessee Williams had when picturing Blanche DuBois. I admire Y/n greatly as a performer and know that she is an actress highly dedicated to perfecting her characters' mannerisms and hope that she goes far with her acting journey." I stared at Klaus surprised, I jumped to my feet, staring at Klaus with intrigue and took the paper from his hands. 

I read the words, staring at them in shock that this was actually true, the author's name is what shocked me the most. Klaus M

"You wrote this?" 

"I did." 

"And you mean it?" 

"I do." Maybe... maybe if a man who didn't know me could make the time to watch all of my performances... maybe he wasn't so bad. 

"Thank you, Klaus... it means a lot." 

It took two years, four months and 18 days for Klaus Mikaelson to get me to warm up to him, I think I deserve a trophy for just how long I've made him work to get to know me better. The truth is, I am terrified of getting killed, kidnapped or tortured by the supernatural me, I mean what if someone worse than Klaus comes into town and because I am one of the very few humans left in town I get used as collateral? 

I was walking home from the Grill, minding my own business until everything went dark and I finally came to find myself tied up in a chair, blood dripping from my nose, head and stomach. I cried out, looking around terrified of who could be hurting me and what they would do if they didn't get what they wanted. 

"Hmm, you're awake again. Try not to pass out this time... the blood loss will really be screwing with your head. I would apologise but I really don't care I just need that damn hybrid to come forward and save your ass-" 

"Who are you?" I cried out, trying my best to not show weakness but the pain in my limbs and the fear that was coming in made it impossible to think of anything but my pain. 

"Who I am isn't important, I tried to keep your face pretty but you know." The unknown figure shrugs, leaning in closer and grabbing my face in his hands with a glare forming and with a snarl he reveals his fangs. I shake my head, feeling his breath on my skin and whimper feeling his fangs pierce my neck. 

It fades away swiftly, the tears cascade down my cheeks, and I stare in shock seeing Klaus standing there and dropping the man's heart onto the floor. Within an instant I was in his arms, I grabbed onto his shirt letting out a sob and whimpering as the pain seemed to increase. 

"Shh, love, it's okay... you're gonna be okay. I've got you." Klaus reassured, biting into his wrist, he gestures to his wrist and I slowly suck on his wrist. 

"I won't let anything happen to you, love. I am very fond of you, I will not let anything happen before I can tell you just how fond I am of you." I stared in fascination as my body healed instantly, it always surprised me and always made me curious to realise how lucky these supernatural beings were. 

"Please, please don't let them hurt me. Don't let them get to me." 

"It's okay, love. I've got you." 

"I'm so scared, every day, I'm scared that I'm going to be kidnapped or tortured... being human, I know I'm nothing compared-"

"I won't let that happen. Love, I won't let anyone hurt you, not again. I swear to you." He hummed lightly, rocking me in his arms and whispered over and over again kind and soothing words. I decided to bring it back to his starting words, once I felt okay and able to move on from what just happened. 

"You're fond of me? Nothing new-" I stated, with a shrug, biting back the smile I wanted to show, Klaus chuckled and helped me to my feet. I stared at him, surely making a weird expression as I hid my emotions. 

"I am fond of you, I like you, quite a bit and I want you to know, love I will do anything to keep you safe. Even if you hate me for the rest of eternity, I will do what I can to keep you safe." My heart skipped a beat, it made me feel special knowing that someone cared for me that much, I nodded and sucked in a breath gradually letting a smile come through. 

"Thank you for saving me... "

"You're welcome, love. Love, I hope you know how gorgeous you are." I blushed, scrunching my face up as his normal charm got to me more than normal. 

"Flattery only gets you so far." 

"Yet, it got me to becoming closer to you." I shrugged, smirking for a moment and sucked in a deep breath. I grabbed his hand, smiling happily and tried my best to not focus in on the blood on my clothes, his clothes and the floor from the attacker. 

"Well, then, perhaps I'll let you in closer." 

[shepscapades]

*rotates dbhc!Xisuma and Doc in my head*

I'm sorry but I absolutely lose my mind over them ( I have literally no one who I could ramble about this to and I need to get it out). I want to analyse stuff, so let me just:

*breathes in*

It's visible that they are good friends and have been since the time when Doc deviated, research partners doing... research? Or whatever researchers do *shrugs*.

But there's one thing to it, X created Doc and most of other androids. He understands what is deviation because Doc explained it to him but his friend is still an android after all. We also know that X always calls Doc "Docm" but in previous comic he calls him "Doc" and it is stated that it's the first time he ever called him that. In which moment he calls him that? In the moment when he realises that Doc is more human than android now, I may be delusional about this all but I just feel like: the moment when he sees Etho overpower Doc, shove him and break him and stuff, Xisuma sees that Doc isn't a fearless machine but a someone, a human, he got overpowered by Etho and suffered consequences, he felt fear like a human not a machine. Also he lost his arm because he was trying to stop Etho from hurting X as we see in the second part of the comic, which only adds to that. So, this is the moment where X fully realises that he means something to Doc, not as a creator, but as a friend, and that's why for the rest of the comic he constantly makes sure if his partner is alright by talking to him, glancing at him. You know stuff. He grew closer and closer to Doc as time passed and I think this was the climax - the moment he called Docm77 "Doc".

While Doc is doing the most stoic stuff ever and trying not to self destruct and stuff, he cares about X too, very much even, he's protective towards him and shows it by jumping into danger he could have avoided [ Etho attacked X because he's an admin and probably knows where's Grian - Etho wants to hunt down this pesky bird for killing Bdubs] just so his partner won't get hurt how sweet <3 RIP arm you will be remembered...

Anyways I feel like they should talk about stuff and maybe cuddle and maybe I don't know LIVE?? NOT DIE??

Yeah, I think that I don't even need to explain for how long they've been spinning in my head.

Also wanted to thank you so much for so many kind words on my fanart !! I'm glad I can make someone happy with my cheap, old drawing tablet and some self taught skills lol sorry for flooding your ask-box again so so sorry but those comics make me go AWOOGA holy shift, and also DOC AND X CONTENT !! They are so underrated that you almost can't find anything good relating to them as a duo! [personally I think they're great, just two dudes that do things together and care for eachother <3]

So, yep. Prepare yourself for things like that after every new part comes out I WILL make memes and I WILL analyse block men.... sorry not sorry :)

[how to get me into an AU- tutorial: Xisumavoid must be in it- the end]

WE ARE ROTATING THEM. WE ARE WATCHING THEM ROTATE!!!!! you freaking GET me

(THERE ARE SOME INTERESTING THOUGHTS HAPPENING HERE!!!! None of which I’ll confirm but Eye Emoji :3 I love love love these theories they make me so happy ehehehehehe)

(ALSO YOU’RE SO WELCOME!!! That art made my day fr LMAO I love and appreciate it so much!!! <3)

[tizeline]

Bro that angst potential ur separated au is keeping me up at night. You've said since Mikey would be a powerhouse due to training at such an early age, would it be safe to assume that Leo & raph are too? They've been mastering their ninpo 4 years? And if yes then dam they must be tanks. Must be a force to be reckoned with the bros and drax being all chaotic. Did they start to train so early bcuz drax only saw them as soldiers n stuff? Drax sure must've softened over the years huh guess he couldn't handle the cute lil menaces lol. Is Donnie aware of his own ninpo yet? I'm imagining him going up against the others with all his cool tech and then they whip out this anime magic ass superpower out of nowhere. Like meeting others like u after years of thinking u were the only one must be at least baffling right, now it turns out magic is real too. And he's gonna have it too(Not to mention the bro bomb waiting to drop on his head). Would his insecurities rise after witnessing all that?

Sorry I just absolutely LOVE ur au friend, i have a ton of questions but ill hold it 4 ltr. I'm really excited to see where you take it :)) -🌾

Oh man, Anon, glad to see you so excited haha!

Just a heads up, I'm still figuring out the story of the AU, so I don't know all the specifics yet, but here are some of my thoughts. And also, this became a bit of a ramble, that's what you get when you send long asks lol /lh

The way I'm thinking how Draxum is gonna be like in this AU is that he didn't view himself as the turtles' father initially, not really because he only viewed them as mere tools for him to use, he always saw them as people with induviduality. But rather, he hadn't really connected the dots that creating children + raising said children = parenthood, which led to Draxum like a year after mutating the turtles having the sudden realization one day of "OH SHIT AM I A DAD!?" and having a mini crisis because of that.

Anyway, while I don't think Draxum is the perfect dad in this AU by any means, he does genuinely care about his kids. (If Mikey managed to win Draxum over in canon after having spent a whole season fighting each other, there's no way he'd care about Mikey any less in a scenario where they've been on the same side since day one like they have in this AU.) He started training the turles from an early age and they are expected to help him with his Definitely Not Evil World Domination Plan, but they are still allowed free time and hobbies and such. And aside from some "ugh I don't wanna train right now I wanna play vidya gaemes" occasionally, the turtles never really opposed the idea of them becoming Draxums super soldiers. Kids are really easily influenced and if your parent keeps telling you that you are the heroes who are gonna save the world from evil, chances are you're gonna latch on to that narrative without question. But after meeting Donnie and April, who knows, it might be what finally starts making the other turtles question if their cause really is as just as they think :) That being said, I still have to figure out how Draxum would react exactly to his sons starting to oppose his world view.

Then their abilities! I also have to do more reasearch into exactly how the magic system works in RoTMNT cuz uhhh it's a bit unclear sometimes. Anyway, ninpo is specifically the magic used by the Hamato clan, and considering Raph, Leo and Mikey weren't raised as Hamato I don't think they would have access to that specific type of magic (though I still think they'd be be able to possibly unlock it later down the line) They would still have access to yokai magic, and of course the mystic weapons that they stole in the show would just have been given to them in AU by Draxum. And oh yeah, the brothers are powerful. To be fair, Donnie was able to keep up with Draxum pretty well in the pilot episode, so he wouldn't be COMPLETELY outmatched by his brothers. His tech is powerful enough that he'd be able to put up a decent fight even if he lacks mystic powers himself but..... three against one? Yeah, Donnie isn't winning any time soon. The biggest advantage he'd have would honestly be that his brothers wouldn't really WANT to fight him cuz they'd be all like "Long Lost Brother™??? 😭😭😭 Please come home Long Lost Brother™ we love you!!! 😭😭😭"

And I think Splinter would have kept both of their origins secret initially like he did in the show, so Donnie would't have any ninpo either, but I also think Donnie would still learn about the whole Lou Jitsu and Genetically Modified Super Soldier thing earlier than in canon. And god, yeah, learning about all of that would definietly be A Lot, which is why I still need time to figure out Donnie's exact reaction sorry Anon you're gonna have to be patient XD

[thelargefrye]

🌷 SMALLS’ FIC RECOMMENDATION LIST.

i've seen a lot of fic rec lists circulating in the community recently and so i felt like i should also make one to support fellow writers who i think really deserve that extra love and attention.

so this is also an appreciation post because i have quite a few things to say. these are mainly writers that i enjoy reading and think need a lot more love and attention because let's be honest, they have amazing ideas and people are just sleeping on them.

so, i'll just jump right into it! make sure to send these writers love and reblog their works!!!

my best friend and person i share a braincell with : @sanjoongie

check out her master list.

like you want to talk about talent? topaz is the one who breathes talent and ideas that literally no one else is coming up with. like if i had to read only one person for the rest of my life, it would be topaz because her writing is just amazing. her moodboards that she makes for her works, perfect. everything topaz does when it comes to writing is amazing, and i'm so glad that she's my best friend and braincell.

and not only that, but topaz is just nice to be talk to! like she makes you want to repeatedly talk to her and she is so good at helping flesh out my own ideas. i wouldn't have written half the things i did last year if it wasn't for her.

anyways, i'm so grateful and proud to call topaz my braincell because she's so amazing, talented, and nice. it breaks my heart that more people don't talk about HER. like you want to read something different and so well written then you need to read literally ANY work topaz has written.

topaz, my lovely braincell, thank you for putting up with me and my shit 24/7. if it wasn't for you i probably wouldn't have gotten out of my writer's block. and just now that i love you and thank you for being an amazing friend and writer.

and if you've gotten this far, i'll just straight up tell you that this is topaz appreciation post. so now i'll link some of my favorite works by her and tell you why i love them:

twilight academy ( all parts ) ( rated : mature )

wizard professor!seonghwa x wizard professor!f!reader ft. ateez

this currently has four parts and is still ongoing and is literally SO good. like who else is writing about a professor au WHERE THEY ARE ALL WIZARDS. and not to mention the worldbuilding and history that is all mentioned and talked about. its so so so good and the smut in it is absolutely to die for. and the chemistry between seonghwa and mc is so good, i love when they go back and forth.

breed ( part one ) ( rated : mature )

ateez x f!reader ( most of the members are aliens with san and another member being human )

now THIS is an alien au done right and different and basically sum it up with one sentence its "alien!teez doing sexual experiments" (from @/morethingsfandom). like its just so good and the SMUT! THE SMUT IS WHY WE ARE HERE PEOPLE!! THIS IS WHAT SCI-FI SMUT IS ABOUT!!! like this is honestly pure pwp and a nice switch up if maybe twilight academy isn't your thing.

see? topaz does everything!

dragon oracle ( here ) ( rated : mature )

dragon!ateez x dragon!f!reader ( based off of my own dragon au )

THIS!! in my opinion is one of topaz's best works (i may be biased lol) and def my favorite from all time. topaz took my au and did her own spin on it and made it her own. she cared about the source material, asked questions, let me ramble, and then boom! a masterpiece was made. if you like my dragon au, then i highly, HIGHLY recommend you read this. and if you've already read... then read it again.

i wish it was me ( here ) ( rated : 18+ )

water bender!san x avatar!hongjoong x water bender!f!reader x water tribe warrior!yunho ( implied ot8 )

again another fic that is based off of mine but literally made it her own because topaz is just that talented. a "what-if" au for my alta series where mc is a water bender and with san and yunho. absolutely amazing and does so well with writing all the characters and their dynamics. a def read if you love atla!

sweet sorrow of evil ( master list ) ( rated : mature )

ateez x evil queen!f!reader ( members have different roles within the story )

this is a collab story between topaz and me and i couldn't make this post and NOT include this series that we are working on together. this really just shows what two authors can make when they come together. we co-wrote the prologue and are currently writing the first chapter. this world is our baby and i love and it has the both of us in a chokehold, i'm so proud of the world me and here built and i want everyone to see it.

and honestly, that's just the tip of the iceberg cause topaz has SO MANY more but these are just the ones that i always think about. like, i really suggest you all check out topaz's works. i have more of her fics on my fic rec blog (@comicsan) so if you want to see more of her and other fics that i have enjoyed then i would check that blog out.

please go show my bestie support, it would mean the world to me!

thank you 🩷

[fire-lizard-ro]

Lil post about HSR men with religious themes for none have lead me into temptation I found the way myself-

This is for you @pix3lplays <333 (I was screaming at her about it, lol-)

I love???? Religious themed characters and the works that come out of that??? I have an Argenti smut fic in the works with heavy religious themes, but here's a mini ramble about Argenti, Sunday, and Luocha.

CW: blasphemy :))), religious themes, softcore gore almost but not really???, somewhat dark themes/dark romance

Yeah I grew up with church and stuff sorry if some of it does make sense to the general public lololol-

For Argenti (snippets from my fic I'm working on):

"He would sooner rend his mortal form to pieces than ever hurt you. Even a little. He would splay his torn shell across the canvas of stars that blanket the universe that was made for you for whatever other higher powers- whatever fate exists should there ever come a day in which his hands hurt rather than protect. So that they may judge what remains of his soul for his crime."

"At your behest he would present his heart, ripped from his chest, for you to take. You were his heart, anyways… Without you there was only a hollow cage within his chest where never again would the echo of a heartbeat reside. The fire nothing but ash where there was once a blaze of life and passion."

For Sunday:

It's either he makes you his church and his bride (talking about how the church is god's bride) or you make him your elohim your "I am". Perhaps both.

His penchant for control is perfect for this. He will be your only god for you are to have no false idols. Only he must remain in your heart for he is the owner of your soul, your life, your breath. He is the light and the truth. His word is law.

But of course, a god must tend to his flock. He will take good care of you for your devotion.

For Luocha:

The thorns. The almost rosary like item he carries, wrapped around his hand. The words he speaks. "Death is not the end. The dead will return."

Pix brought to my attention the idea that some have about Luocha carrying your body, devoid of breath and life, in his coffin.

And to that I respond:

"So devoted was he that not even the sacred soil of the earth would be allowed to have you. Even in death."

He would search until the ends of the universe to find a way to bring you back to him. Even though his god was made of flesh and blood as he, it mattered not. Only you could possibly be the divine for you were his cornerstone. Without you he would fall apart. God works in the waiting and surely this was his divine burden- His test from you to prove his devotion. He was sure he would one day complete this task for you and bring you back. You, the life beyond death. You the light in the midst of his darkness. His eloah, his elohim, his almighty.

[fatuismooches]

Hi hi, it's me muzzle anon again ! How are you? I hope you are doing well, also sorry for this long rambling-

I juST remembered that when lyney and lynette were announced (?) some people thought that they would be One playable character, so I immediately thought how fragile reader and dottore being one playable character lol

just switching between them when you do a charge attack like furina's ability but instead of just color palate changing, a whole new person gets on the field lol

It's fun to imagine what their voiceline would be :]

Especially if we imagine that the only reason you would switch would be because they are in a fight when changing so the voicelines would be worried and/or intense?

And also fragile!reader being a support character and dottore being a DPS would fit the whole "we only need/have each other" mindset going on ?

ALSO ALSO when you add them to your team they could come into the screen dancing? Waltzing into their section then standing close to each other <3 evil couple being cool vibes

Their idle and voicelines probably would be still the same ?, talking as if the other is not there but maybe one special idle is like that one twirle/dance (?) idle from honkai star rail with Clara and Svarog? OH and Clara stumbles in that idle and svarog catches her , makes sense since fragile reader stumbles while trying to dance too so Dottore catches them by their waist and smirks, sharp teeth full display

...Also you know how characters has voicelines for hits/ damage? Reader and Dottore could have voicelines for warning each other to be careful, especially Dottore getting very worried when reader takes a heavy hit but when it comes to other characters he just goes scara mode maybe worse than, "Why are you even here?" or similiar to xiao going, "Weak."

(And maybe reader comparing the character that took damage to Dottore, praising him while degrading them gently lol <3)

Tho I'm not really sure how the teapot would work lol maybe there would be an option to switch them like you switch from night to day lol OR they automatically change when it's day/night I imagine that fragile reader would like the day time more and Dottore night, because he is a shady guy (and also because when he looks up to stars he remembers the Akademia days he had with reader and how they used to also stare at the stars <3)

With them being considered one character, now they are together forever <3

Sorry for the long message again <3 also english is not my first language so sorry if some parts seem weird I just rambled a lot without checking since i got very excited of the idea of a playable reader after the last post ehehe anyway hope u and everyone has a nice night/day!

- muzzle anon

OH MY GOSH NFKFEWFE I JUST LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS MUZZLE ANON... ugh fragile reader and Dottore being playable is so real!! And i too remember that about the twins!! man that was really long ago huh? Anyway...

I ADORE the idea of them switching while doing a charge attack!! omfgrfwfr I can just imagine reader doing a dramatic, fancy pose and then it switches to Dottore rolling his eyes at your antics and adjusting his gloves... ugh he loves to indulge you, doesn't he? And hear me out too: instead of pneuma/ousia... two different elements/weapons too. They're just meta like that 😌 and extra supports who? Bennett? Nah, we don't need him. Reader is all the support Dottore needs to one-shot everyone <3 I imagine Dottore is the one who tries to hoard the screen time (he prefers to fight instead of you, he's worried about you pushing yourself too hard, but eventually he has to realize that he has to let you do your own thing too... he's hella overprotective still)

THE ADDING THEM INTO YOUR PARTY ANIMATION... CHEF'S KISS. I like to imagine reader is the one who tries to take the lead in this stuff :) Because even though they're still sick they're better than before, so they want to take advantage of that as much as they can and show Dottore how much they've changed :) You pull him into the frame of the screen and he twirls you around as you fall back into his chest, hands still intertwined :3 (traveler looking at your dramatic asses) AND THE IDEA OF DOTTORE CATCHING FRAGILE READER DURING THEIR IDLES...... UGHREGR WHY DO YOU BLESS ME WITH SO MANY GOOD IDEAS. Reader trying their best to hide their lousy skills from Dottore so they can get better on their own, but nope! You should have known that your husband is always watching you, nothing gets past him! He catches you by the waist only to pull you back up with ease and spin you around flawlessly, chuckling as you stumble right back into his chest.

Dottore would straight up not care at ALL about the other members if they got hurt 💀, I imagine he'd only speak if anything happened to you, or he'd be condescending about how useless they were 💀 reader is similar but they're nicer to others, like if a fellow Harbinger got hurt, they'd worry, but if it was an Archon or someone that annoys them, in general, they'd just laugh at them (and receive little to no healing)

In the teapot, I like to imagine they have two separate bodies there when you place them, so they just always stand next to close to each other. When you talk to either of them, both of them will end up having a conversation with you. Also, when you make them specific furnishings they like each of them and will comment on the other's tastes lol (Dottore - makeshift lab, you - cozy Sumerian room)

"Huh, will it kill you to put away the research? You do not need a lab in the teapot, dear."

"Oh, but I do, [Name]. How else will I make your medicine?"

"Ah... sorry about that. How about you come to my room later so we can relax?"

Traveler: ...

They are truly the embodiment of do not separate.

UGH I CAN GO ON AND ON ABOUT THEM!! 😭 let's not forget the matching skins... you and him in the Akademiya's uniforms again ;) AND DONT APOLOGIZE MUZZLE ANON!! I LOVE THIS AND LONG ASKS!!

[ddollfface]

Hi, can you please do headcanons for kaiou retsu? If you want to...

𝐀 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐚

𝙆𝙖𝙞𝙤𝙝 𝙍𝙚𝙩𝙨𝙪 𝙔𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙨

Warnings; bad writing, really ooc, not proofread stalking, me rambling, manipulation, pretty short, I'm 90% sure that this isn't really yandere, but whatever. If I missed anything, then please let me know ♡ Pssh, what kind of question is that? Of course, I want to write for Retsu! I'm just really happy that someone requested something from baki... Anyway, I hope you enjoy! If you have any questions/suggestions, then feel free to ask!!

I find Retsu to be a very, very intriguing character, seeing as he's had so much development throughout the series. Not only that but when you look just at his past, you'll find that he's adapted and changed so much from his younger years. Restu has multiple different layers to his character, as most Baki men do, but I find that there are a lot of contradictions in his personality, which I'll get into why I think that is. But let's start from what we know because we have to establish what kind of man Restu is before we decide what kind of yandere he is (I also just like to talk lol).

We don't know too much about Restu's past, but we do know that he grew up in the temple, with no mention of any parents. I like to think that his mama (or both parents) just left him at the temple for whatever reason, the possibilities are truly endless. It doesn't matter too much, as Retsu's never shown to care too much for discussing his unknown parents, seeing as he holds his sensei/s in high regard.

I like to think that Retsu considers the martial arts his family; what comforts him when he's distraught or doesn't know what to do. Not having a family, someone to rely on, can cause a person's mental health to be warped. And that's why we always substitute it for something else, whether it be a father/mother figure, a sport, a job, or a lover. Whatever it is, we use it as a substitution for the emotional stability parents are supposed to give us (not saying that they always do).

And this is why I hypothesize that the martial arts is Retsu's substitution. He was conditioned to rely on it, to think of it as a way of life. Therefore, he doesn't rely on other people for emotional support, instead, turning to martial arts to lead the way, y'know?

Martial arts have consumed his life, taking control of his mind, and everyday activities. There's never a moment in the day where he isn't either actively practicing or thinking of it. There's nothing else he can think about, seeing as he was raised to; it's ingrained in his psyche.

This leads to a dead social life. Unless they're fellow fighters or some type of service worker, Retsu doesn't go out often and doesn't enjoy the company of others. This is partially because I think he's more of an introvert or never at places where he can make many friends. Don't get me wrong, he has allies, (After all, we can't forget when Shibukawa punched Musashi for Retsu), but do they do "friend things," y'know? I don't think they just hang out together or things of that nature.

And don't even get me started on Retsu with women, god. You can't convince me that he'd be a flustered mess if a woman ever took interest in him. It's not like he's some shy babygirl-type character, hell no, he's a badass, but he doesn't interact with women, growing up in a temple surely didn't help.

There likely weren't any women at the temple, unless they were there to clean or something (don't @ me, I have no clue), meaning there's no experience there. He's a fighter. Let's be honest, not many women are actively interacting with the fighters. Sure, they'll attend the fights and crap, but I don't think that it's often the fighters are being approached unless they're in a club or bar. Which I don't think Retsu is doing.

Now going back to the original point, Retsu is unbearable with women (if they're flirting). I don't think Retsu can't speak to them. He just can't flirt. He doesn't know how to handle romantic interest from a woman. If you were to hold his hand, kiss his cheek, or touch him in any way. His face would flush, and his eyes would widen. If you were to compliment him, I'd imagine him bowing or trying to maintain respect for you.

I can't really imagine too many ways you'd meet Restu, but it'd probably be with him swooping into your rescue (figuratively or literally). It could be that you were getting harassed, and he escorted you out of the situation, or you could've been struggling with picking something up (like groceries, a box, or something similar). I can even see that you're his new neighbor, and you bring him some food to introduce yourself (I like this idea the most, so we're going to roll with this one).

Assuming you meet Retsu through being his neighbor, you'll be able to grow a more organic relationship, seeing as you two see each other every day. I like to imagine that you'd bring him some sweets or something to introduce yourself, and Retsu will quickly rebut it by inviting you over for dinner, as a way to show his gratitude for the gift.

From there, you're relationship will subtly grow more and more, advancing from neighbors to close friends. You'll begin to notice that you're feeling eyes on you like someone is watching you. It's as if Retsu's always there now, somehow knowing where you are. He'll begin to show up at your local grocery store, but you'll brush it off. After all, you're neighbors, of course, you'll both attend the same stores! But then you'll see him at your work, subtly passing by right as your shift ends, stopping you to chat and walk you home. It's a little odd, you think, but Retsu's so considerate! He just wants to ensure your safety! There's nothing to worry about.

I think that Retsu will quickly realize that he's growing an attachment to you, as I think that he's the most emotionally aware man in the series. He knows that he became a little too attached, a little too paranoid over your being. But Retsu would rationalize it by telling himself that he's taking care of you, watching out for you, you, you.

He'll always be there for you. Whatever you need is did and done. You need someone to walk you home 'cause you're too scared to go alone, don't worry Retsu can do that for you, no problem. You're sick and need someone to take care of you? Pssh, not even a question. Retsu doesn't mind; he'll even bring over some herbal tea from his motherland. Oh, and don't even think about opening a door for yourself, nope. Don't worry, Retsu's there. He's such a gentleman, always there for you, conveniently knowing where you are at all times.

You have to understand that there are a lot of people who are out for Retsu, and by proxy, you. Retsu has to make sure you're safe and sound. No one can lay a finger on you, so just stay where he can see you, yeah? He'd never do anything to hurt you. He's always had your best interest in mind, making sure you're well-fed, properly clean, and having the attention you need, so just trust him, okay?

Don't mind him cutting all of your friends out of your life. They were just too toxic, leaving you out of everything, talking behind your back, so you should just let them go. And for your family? Well, they've been manipulating you into thinking that they want what's good for you, but you just don't realize how harmful they've been to you, don't you? It's okay, Retsu will help you. He can see how horrible they are.

Little do you know, this whole time Retsu has been threatening, cutting off, and hoarding you all for himself. He can't trust anyone with your safety. For all he knows, they could harm you, could take you away from him. He can't let them do that; he cares for you too much. You understand, surely, he's just looking out for you, so just turn the other way and do as he says.

Don't worry, he's going to handle everything.

[woah-uhuh-uhuh-uhuh]

Christine Canigula was socially ostracized & developed a complex to protect herself: an essay

(suddenly i NEED to infodump about Christine actually so here)

Something I only noticed on rewatch: the way Christine will say something silly and then just kind of gingerly wait to see if Jeremy reacts well to it before continuing, almost like she's asking permission?? (e.g. the gap after the first stanza of "Play Rehearsal"). And it's only after he riffs off her bowling alley bit that she feels comfortable talking about her personal feelings with him (right before "Guy that I'd Kinda be Into"). The same happens with their "weird noise" exchange immediately before "It's pretty killer to sit and chat with you." I know theater relies on being succinct, and that 'bonding over shared quirks' and 'feelings talk' are both just crucial parts of relationship development... but I don't think it's a coincidence that it always goes in that order!

It's like Jeremy has to pass these *trials of weirdness* before she feels safe opening up to him and it drives me BONKERS so I wrote a whole 1000 word thing about it under the cut and this got too massive and I'm sorry. Also some autistic Jeremy meta at the end if that sweetens the pot hehehe

Table of contents:

Why she was ostracized

How she was ostracized

How that might inform her pattern of relationship development with Jeremy and Jake

How gender caused Jeremy's experiences to differ from hers, and how that affects their current relationships with "popularity" and peer acceptance.

1. Why she was ostracized

I am just so certain that Christine has been bullied or at least majorly outcast for a lot of her life. She's very obviously neurodivergent and because of that she can have these obnoxiously deep and repetitive interests, she can't judge if a piece of information will be genuinely interesting to someone, and she doesn't take social cues very well.

She frequently interrupts people when they're talking (an ADHD symptom btw), even when they're literally talking to her about the thing she wants to hear!

(C: "Do you find that? Because I totally find that!" J: "Uh, yeah, I-" C: "-And no matter how hard I try....")

(J: "I know the last thing I deserve is another shot, but-" C:"Jeremy, just... say what's on your mind.") (girl I'm sorry but that's what he was doing..... I have a whole other thoughtpiece on how this particularly fucks with Jeremy while they're dating but thats another thing...)

She doesn't seem confident in her interpretations of people's emotions and she'll ask/talk about them point blank (both theirs and her own) in a way a lot of people would find rude

("Uh, you seem really nervous...") ("Popular people are fucked up! *mutual laughter* …I mean, you're one of them!") ("I am flattered, this is new / still I'm not sure what I should do" <- as a response to getting asked out, that's pretty bold! Plus the entire part where she laughs at Jake's "rich boy routine") (also compare and contrast to Jeremy's "I don't know what I'm supposed to say right now." idk. are your allistic stage dorks in the room with us right now motherfuckers)

I'd go on about her hyperfixations/special interests too but I think Play Rehearsal pretty much sums it up lol

2. How she was ostracized

All this to say that I am CERTAIN she spent a lot of her schooling having "nice girls" patiently let her sit with them at lunch for weeks at a time until they finally get sick of her rambling and faux pas. Only when they leave does Christine realize that they didn't actually care about anything she said... And this happens over and over and over. (I know this seems hella specific but I swear it's an actual phenomenon... at least I'm pretty sure? sdjflksjf)

But anyway, it's clear that by the time they're juniors, Christine has kind of (and I do only mean kind of) figured out what behaviour other people respond poorly to. And from evidence I stated in the intro, I think she's become really careful about which people she lets herself get attached to. She doesn't want this to ever happen again - which means if she's going to hang out with someone, she has to know that they actually care about her, that they know she will sometimes be obnoxious or blunt, and they'll still be okay with that forever.

3. Applying this to her canon relationships

You can extend this to Jake, someone who sees her in her element in drama rehearsal (the thing everyone finds annoying about her because she won't shut up about it) and STILL likes her. I think it's a totally valid reading that her bluntness with him later ("Upgrade") is just because she misreads him / doesn't quite get the social standard that she should be white lying instead. But I think you could also read her as testing the waters. If she's really going to commit to dating this guy, she's gotta know he's okay with her being herself. And the fact that this guy (and I think it's significant that he is a boy, for reasons I'll explain in the end note) genuinely seems to like her is a whole new level of peer validation ("I am flattered, this is new") -- so of course she's gonna fall at least a little! It doesn't hurt that he's "tired of being the person that everyone thinks that I am..." just like her!

Her history with being pity-liked makes Chloe's "advice," that Jake's just toying with her and is going to move on soon, even scarier, because that's genuinely happened to her (on a platonic level) so many times before.

Jeremy is also a good candidate from the beginning because he's weird he's a weirdo he doesn't fit in and he doesn't wanna fit in you ever see him without this stupid cardigan on? that's weird! And she keeps warming up to him not only because they're getting to know each other but because he gets progressively more willing to not only tolerate (as Jake does) but *participate* in her weirdness!

First, she does something weird and he tolerates it ("Play Rehearsal"); the next time she's weird, he participates! (bowling ball before GTIKBI). Then finally finally finally he initiates the weirdness and lets her join in! ("weird noises" exchange before GTIKBI reprise).

And notably, it is THIS moment that canonically signifies that they've hit the apex of their canon relationship development. If there was an achievement called "Befriend Christine," it would have popped up right then and there!!!

IN CONCLUSION: YOUR HONOR I LOVE THEM T_T

4: Christine vs. Jeremy: Gender differences & how that ultimately impacts their social goals

I also think all of this would have happened to Jeremy too if he'd been a girl. But because, generally, young boys feel less social obligation than girls to take pity on the autistic kid (and because boys tend to be more quickly recognized as autistic) he just ends up completely alone for most of his school life (Michael nonwithstanding - and yeah there's an important distinction between your childhood friend putting up with you and knowing that, woah, I guess literally nobody else ever will).

Meanwhile, Christine has had people "put up" with her, and she's SICK OF IT!

That's part of why their complexes are so different, because Christine is trying to check everyone she meets to make sure they'll be okay with her weirdness before she gets attached, Jeremy is trying to eliminate his weirdness altogether because he's never even experienced his peers listening out of *pity* so how the hell can he expect someone to ever listen to him out of *interest?*

Jeremy has never had someone pretend to like him before, so he completely lacks Christine's fear of befriending someone who secretly hates you. He doesn't realize how bad it'll hurt him if he destroys his real self for popularity, if he befriends people who would have bullied his real self. He doesn't know what disingenuous friendship feels like, so like a very young Christine he's still actively trying to get there because he thinks it's the only kind of validation he'll ever get.

Do you see what im saying? Do you see it???? AUAUGUGUUGGH

THANK YOU FOR READING!!! If you have thoughts or even rebuttals please share i am so desperate to discuss the blorbos

[bitter-hibiscus]

Hey hi you have piqued my interest and I would love to hear your thoughts on Jason and Roy's interaction in New Titans #20-21 :)

OKAY OKAY OKAY!!! SO THOSE ISSUES ARE SO SO SO IMPORTANT TO ME BC THEY SET THE FOUNDATION OF JASON'S RELATIONSHIP WITH AUTHORITY HERO FIGURES AND. ROY IS PRETTY MUCH THE ONLY POSITIVE ONE

Sorry for rambling about more than just Roy and Jason but I had to set a foundation for my points.

The only three people who actually speak to Jason at any point for more than a single line in those issues are Donna, Hawk, and Roy.

Donna, as is plainly stated in the text, is not actually talking to Jason, but to Robin, and she expects him to act exactly like Dick Grayson does.

In the beginning of the story, this isn't particularly an issue, since Jason is very excited to be included and Donna isn't actually putting any kind of pressure on him. HOWEVER, as issue #20 progresses, it becomes really, really serious. Particularly in this scene:

Donna, who up until this point Jason generally worshipped in that way children always do, just showed him she's not only capable of extreme violence against her teammates, but also willing to completely leave the people depending on her behind. (I may not be the biggest Donna lorehead but I'm pretty sure this isn't something she does often. It is, however, what Jason sees her doing, and that's important.)

Jason, kindhearted, boneheaded Jason, immediately calls her out on this. He trusts that Donna is a capable and trustworthy hero and team leader, but the image of a perfect heroine has been broken.

Donna puts almost the... complete opposite kind of pressure on Jason that Bruce does. Bruce has trained Jason to obey, and to try and force him into a leadership role while three of your teammates are literally unconscious is, to say the least, stress-inducing to a little kid.

(oops, the Donna part got long. I have a lot of feelings about them, okay?)

The second person who interacts with Jason in those issues is Hawk, who is, you know. Hawk.

The first thing he says to Jason is mocking his age, which Jason seems to be pretty self-aware of in a negative way, being the only child in a group of 20-something-year-olds.

Then, he actively stops Jason from joining a fight and doing his part as a Titan:

It's the polar opposite of how Donna treats Jason in this issue. Hawk sees Jason as incapable and unfit for being a Titan. It's both demotivating and incredibly insulting, especially when Jason was trying to do the right thing.

So we're 0 for 2 for grown-up superheroes being dicks to Jason.

Enter Roy Harper, stage left.

Roy is the only member of the team to both acknowledge Jason as a teammate and still speak to him like the child he is without being patronizing or mocking, despite his conflicting and complicated emotions on the mission they're going to, because Cheshire. He keeps himself friendly and inviting to Jason, forces himself to joke around, because Jason is a child who shouldn't be responsible for Roy's Whole Ordeal.

He actively humors Jason's worship and wonder of superheroes, but still jokes around with him like Jason is an equal and not a kid he's babysitting.

He offers Jason company and empathy, and encourages him to share his view of the situation, once again treating Jason as a team member worthy of being listened to, but not particularly of being in charge of anything. Jason, for his part, pays attention to what's happening with Roy, and expresses concern over what Roy's feelings on the situation might be.

(long pause to admire how beautiful Jade looks in this story. anyway)

This scene is also really important, I think. Not only for the obvious reasons of Lian Being Revealed, but because even though Roy is reeling from the knowledge that he has a child, he still has space in his thoughts to care about Jason and want him safe. Even though Jason's attempt to lighten the mood was... less than optimal. Lol. I love him so much

Jason is there for what some may argue is the biggest part of Roy's development as a character, and even though he's secondary to everything that's happening, Roy still considers Jason an important part of the situation. He still takes Jason into account, despite desperately wanting answers from Jade.

I have nothing to say about those panels but look at them. my babies. jason is so so worried. his new friend is not ok and he cant help :(

TLDR: Jason's interactions with most adult heroes are.. pretty bad, (Not all. Shoutout to my men Joey Wilson and Garfield Logan,) but Roy is a major exception to that rule. He's compassionate and funny and a hurricane of emotions, and he's the first adult outside of Batman and Nightwing to canonically show Jason a little bit of kindness. While not in any way backed by canon, I do think that Jason's interactions with Roy filled him with determination to be a good hero and earn other people's trust. Those two issues have very small interactions, but I do believe they're some of the most important pieces of original Robin Jason content, largely due to Roy's presence.

[chlorinecake]

I just saw what that anon said and I can really really relate I feel like there's no way I can like them cuz I'm black I feel like. Weird for having a crush on Ni-ki cuz I'm black and even though I know there's no chance anyway cause he probably doesn't date fans obviously lol It makes me ashamed especially because people are always saying "what if / he probably doesn't like black girls/people" and it makes me feel like I'm less beautiful because I'm black and even if he did date fans I mean I'm like SOOOO ugly like atrocious but it makes me feel like even if I was a little bit more pretty he wouldn't like me or would dismiss me cause I'm black or like I wouldn't be good enough or he'd be disgusted or disappointed or weirded out because I'm black and a fan /has a crush on him and besides him it makes me feel like enhypen wouldn't talk to me or treat me the same cuz I'm not Asian or white like I couldn't be a fan or wouldn't be as important or pretty or cool or even just they wouldnt want me as a fan or like me or even look my way cause im black its gotten so bad that people dont evn have to say that anymore (they do but they dont have too) for me to think that way. Like I know we all saw that pretty engene video with that girl with the glasses and i couldn't help but make it about race like thinking would they look at me like that or would I be ugly abd weird cause I'm black ? Or if she was black would they still think she's pretty? Or would they even put the camera on her if she was black ? Anyway I'm rambling but being black is something I struggle with even without people saying the group I like or the guy I have a crush on (Niki obviously) wouldn't like me or would hate me for being black . Or they would be uncomfortable or disgusted with me because I'm black so it's just hard to even see myself meeting them or *even to imagine myself in reader fanfics even if the reader's supposed to be black because I've convinced myself that the only way I'd be pretty or attractive or they'd be friends withe or date me in Ni-kis case is if I was white or Asian* (*just talking about from a fanfic standpoint for this one* but yeah) but yeah it sucks and

Okay, I REFUSE to sit here and let you talk down on yourself like that. I don’t care how true you may think it is, YOU ARE NOT UGLY, Mirah ~ You’re beautiful, from head to toe, melanated skin, curly hair and all. Black women are beautiful, it’s disgusting to me how society has brought some of us to a point where we feel insecure, undesirable, or unworthy of affection from others. My words might not do much to encourage you, because finding confidence (esp as a black girl) takes time. But I really urge you to understand that you can’t expect other ppl to accept you when you don’t even accept yourself. Wish I could give you the BIGGEST hug rn, bc this actually hurts to read :(

Another point, I’ve seen plenty videos of Enhypen (along with other kpop groups) connecting with colored fans in the same way they do with their supporters of a fairer complexion, but I won’t share any of those videos here bc I don’t want you to seek “proof” as a way for you to feel better abt yourself.

On the flip side, let’s say that some ppl in the kpop industry DO have a prejudice (which I’m sure some do): your life and happiness isn’t dependent on their validation.

Let’s not even get started on how a lot of Ni-Ki’s favorite artists are black (Riki Jackson ? Bro would’ve never called himself that if he was racist)… but anyway, colored people like any other group of individuals can b really amazing once they get past their insecurities and embrace the way God made them. Jst know that u can always come to be if your struggling with something or just want to vent <3

[remotepixel]

I love your stories so much!! I've really been wanting more platonic yandere marvel stories and yours are so amazing! Is it alright if you could write a platonic yandere bucky? ❤❤

I'm so happy you like my work (twirling my hair and giggling rn) <33

Also, thank you for requesting!!

Tw: Yanderes themes + stalking!

I think, at first, he wouldn’t want to be near you more than necessary.

-It sounds mean (and he definitely feels guilty) but the guy’s still trying to figure out what he’s going to do now, after years of being brainwashed and only having one goal.

-There’s a lot of internal confusion going on and adding yandere traits that he’s 99% sure are not normal only pushes him further towards the edge.

-However, if you stay persistent in getting to know him, or Steve encourages him to make new friends, he would hesitantly embrace these traits as part of his new life.

He definitely has a soft spot for you.

-His face would remain as stoic as ever (force of habit) but, around you, you would see a ghost of a smile he would never directly admit.

-He’ll joke around you, mainly sarcastic comments or the type of jokes that aren’t that funny but you laugh anyways, and would playfully shove you with an eyeroll if you make a stupid one back.

-He’ll listen to you explain all the new modern tech, complain about school - anything if it makes you happy.

-He would be wary of physical intimacy (especially because of his metal arm), but I think he would warm back up to it.

-He likes having your head lean on his shoulder, or messing up your hair despite your protest.

-It grounds him in a way, let’s him know he’s here, in this moment, and not freezing alone.

He wouldn’t be as outright controlling as some of the others.

-He knows what it feels like to be a passenger in your own life and wouldn’t want to inflict that onto someone else.

-Despite any thoughts he might have against it, he wouldn’t restrict what you do (unless it could put you in danger of course), even if it means not hanging out for a while.

Although, he might stalk you.

-He internally argues with himself every time he does it, but he’s just concerned for your safety.

-Apart from court-mandated therapy or talking to Steve, he suddenly has free time he doesn’t know how to fill.

-In his mind, he’s helping you and calming the swirling pit in his stomach whenever he thinks about you being in danger.

He’s overprotective, even if he tries to draw it back.

-Protecting you has become his new purpose and, despite all of the unlearning he’s being forced into, he still feels a sense of duty to carry out his role no matter what.

-He’ll keep a careful eye of any of your friends (he doesn’t even want to think of you getting a partner) to make sure they’re treating you how they should.

-If they’re not, then the ex-Winter Soldier will be having a nice conversation with them (the next day, they’re suddenly apologising and actively avoiding you).

-He doesn’t want to be known as that anymore but he can’t say his reputation doesn’t have any benefits.

Opening up to someone after everything he’s been through was only a pipe dream, something to promise Steve he’ll try but know he’ll never achieve. But, as he watches you ramble about your day, he allows himself to consider it possible.

I think this a bit shorter than normal I think but I was struggling lol

Also, I don't know where I got 1940s him being a fan of physical touch from but I added it so...

[sessakag]

I just wanna say that I absolutely LOVE Butterfly. It’s kinda the only fanfic I care about at the moment lmao I am LOCKED IN. The story itself is great, all of the characters (even the ones everyone hate rn) are interesting, the writing is phenomenal…I could go on and on.

I have a few thoughts I wanted to get out of my head. These aren’t suggestions (cuz it’s your story and I trust where you’re gonna take it), it’s moreso just kinda be me rambling lol:

Sasuke- I know you’ve mentioned he’s going to show up again later, but I’m so anxious to see the role he’s going to play. I don’t really want it to be a romantic thing with Hinata (I am a firm NaruHina lover lol) but I would love to see him be some kind of a protective friend for her? In my head he and Hinata already know each other; like they had some type of group therapy for traumatized teens or after she was removed from her dad’s care she was temporarily in a group home where she met Sasuke and they got to know each other idk. He knows her story and the pain she deals with, and is able to relate in a sense. So he doesn’t want to see her be taken advantage of. Idk, again this is NOT a suggestion lmao just rambling.

Strength- I would argue that Hinata’s the strongest character in the story so far. Even stronger than Naruto. She’s been thru absolute hell and suffers with severe anxiety and depression. The fact she struggles with suicidal ideations and is still making the choice to live is a testament to her strength. I hope that as the story progresses, Hinata starts to recognize that in herself.

Naruto- love the way you write Naruto in this; the chapters in his pov are some of favorites tbh. As someone mentioned before, I too would love to get a few jealous Naruto scenes. Especially since he’s starting to actually *see* Hinata and recognize his attraction to her. I’m assuming that as the story progresses, Hinata will grow into her own person and become somewhat independent of Naruto (like getting her own friends); is that something Naruto might feel threatened by? Since he does have a selfish streak and is immature, I wonder if he would have an issue with keeping Hinata all to himself.

I think those were the main ramblings I had. Chapter 8 is my absolute favorite so far cuz of the cute NaruHina moment we got. I know smut is probably a ways away but I cannot WAIT till we get to it cuz you are one of my favorite smut writers tbh. Anyways that’s all for now. Can’t wait to see what you have in store for us!

Thank you so much! 🙈💕💗so so so happy you're enjoy the fic that much 💕makes my heart do cartwheelssss 🏃🏾‍♀️🤸🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️💗☺️🫶🏽 and thank you so much for dropping love in my inbox, I absolutely adore you all that do I swear 🥹

Ahhhh, you have some really interesting ruminations🙈

Sasuke- Surprisingly a lot of readers have been waiting to see how Sasuke fits into all this🤭I've gotten some incredibly creative scenarios and prediction from commenters and anons that I've actually added to his role and even moved his entrance up in the timeline😄This is a very interesting scenario and I really, really like it a lot! So many people really want a protective friend Sasuke and I can't say the idea isn't unbearably adorable 💕

Strength- You hit the nail on the head for sure🫡💕Hinata's inner strength is one that's often overlooked, underestimated and underappreciated when compare to more overt forms of strength, or socially constructed ideals of what it means to be strong, and I've really, really been wanting to make a point in the world of fanfiction, specifically the Naruto fandom of fanfiction, that strength is not always aggression, violence and bitchy attitude 🤦🏽‍♀️ because I've seen, for years now, this narrow, short sighted standard of who is strong and who is weak being perpetrated and it's always, always bothered the crap out of me 😤With Butterfly, I'm hoping to open minds and break molds we've been taught to believe are absolute👎🏽but are actually highly subjective👈🏽 I swear, so many of my fics are 'break the mold' type fics, lol, I think I just like to nay say the nay sayers, ya know, shine light on areas and topics that many may make negative assertions and toxic assumptions about while in reality, know very little about the subject matter at all. I think it opens the door for more compassion, understanding and inclusion ️🫶🏽 and honestly, that's what I'm all about.

Naruto- I love, love, love me a Naruto POV 🙈idk what it is about Naruto in particular since I love most make POV but it is soooo much fun being in his head 🤭Butterfly!Naruto and Prey!Naruto are two of my fave Naruto POV's to write in, both are so much fun in different ways 😄For sure Naruto's gonna have his jealousy moments, he's too hot headed and selfish in Butterfly not to🤭Its definitely not out of the realm of possibility that he'll feel some type of way about not being the center of her attention🤔right now, he's the golden boy, he's got the coveted place at her side, he's got exclusive access nobody else has, losing that, well, he might not be too keen on it🤭although, he's been trying to introduce her to his friends and help her with her speech problems, so maybe he'll take it as a source of pride that he's help her find her confidence🤔that's why I love this Naruto 🤭he really can go either way. Like, on one hand, he can be sweeter than cotton candy, some real tooth rotting sweetness, but on the other hand he can be a selfish asshole making scummy choices just to get what he wants😅he gets tunnel vision, and the only thing that matters is reaching his goals by any means necessary. He's just a really fun character🤭

I super duper appreciate you leaving your ramblings here!! I enjoy each and every one of them! Chapter 8 is near and dear to me too!! I enjoyed writing it so, so much, the cuteness almost melted my laptop 🙈💕 I cannot wait to do more sweet bonding scenes for them ️🫶🏽 that's honestly why my fanfics be so long, I get so caught up in just enjoying and marinating in NaruHina love 🙌🏽its like a virus I never wanna get rid of 😫 Smut is indeed a ways off, but I can't wait to get to it too 🙈 and tys, I'm honored to be one of your faves💕 Thank you, thank you for dropping by!!! I really loved seeing your ramblings! 🫶🏽

[sabo-has-my-heart]

Hello! I'm the anon that asked if you could write a male!reader. I was making sure you do :).

Well... I saw the fic with traffy and reader that has those wings! It was amazing! It made me think, what happens if like- Law had this (rude) awakening. Like he realizes he could be bisexual or pansexual after seeing male!(y/n) shirtless for the first time.

But like-- (y/n) almost has the same body composition as law but just with a bit more muscles since he's like responsible for some heavy duty work around the sub.

Also, I had this occuring thought, a devil fruit of sorts, like... A devil like those performers at wano? (Forgot what they were called 😭😭)

The devil fruit allows the user to turn into a lion or a big furry wolf, only downside is that... Male! (y/n) would have like a fur as a chest? Like a soft fur chest? But the human muscle structure is still there but the fur is just on top like most animals. Like soft cloud pillows 🤤🤤

Anyway- the devil fruit's downside can also vary if it's a lion, the instinct of being on top of everything since lions are the king of the jungle and for big furry wolf is that... It only seems in the darkness, like... He'd hate the light since most wolves hunt at night (I guess...?)

I didn't understand what I typed lol, I hope you do, though 😂😂

(also, re-reading this... Maybe male!(y/n)'s chest would look a bit big if it's under some clothes but it's the fur that's making them big by the volume of said fur {yes, I study volumes of fur because I love lions and big furry wolves lol} as well as maybe, juuuuussst maybe, (y/n) enjoy brushing the fur on his chest every once in a while.)

Don't worry about me understanding, I ramble too. Since you didn't specify if you wanted them to be different fics, I included it all in one thing. I made him a wolf because while I like all cats (big or small) in real life, in the instances of writing, I like wolves better. I hope this is what you wanted and please let me know if you don't like it! I've only written like, 3 things with a male reader!

Warnings: Male!Reader, mentions of arousal, fluffy wolf!Reader

Word Count: 1350

     The Polar Tang had always required quite a bit of maintenance. A submersible ship with hundreds of moving parts that needed constant attention. Subsequently, along with the typical night watch, there was usually a crew member dedicated to roaming the halls and checking or looking out for any problems that might arise with the machinery and either fix them or wake the crew. For reasons he’d never really understood, you usually took this shift if possible. Working late into the night then sleeping late into the morning. Most of the others didn’t much care for the shift, finding the darkness of night on the sub to be rather eerie. Yet you seemed… eager to fill the shift. You’d joined only 2 years back, shortly after Sabaody. An interesting man, about his age, with a similar body build, only with a larger chest and more muscle. Nocturnal as hell, having a surprising abundance of energy at night, yet absolutely dead in the mornings, playful with the crew, yet he’d seen you actively take attacks aimed for the crew or viciously tear into an enemy that threatened them. 

     Closing your file, he leaned back in his chair. You’d avoided his physicals probably a dozen times or more, always stating an excuse, but he was determined to get you into his office this time! This time, he had Penguin and Shachi watching you, waiting for the second you had a free moment before they ‘pounced’, telling you that you should go see Law for your physical exam. It wasn’t long before you were peeking your head into his office, looking around as if hoping he wasn’t there. To be honest, you didn’t mind doctors, it wasn’t that you were afraid of them, but this was Law, the most attractive doctor on earth! How could you just go in there and be… examined by him? Forced to sit still, half naked, on his table, hoping that your body didn’t… react to him, praying that he didn’t get close enough for you to take in his scent. He looked like he smelled like coffee… coffee and sanitizer, the latter of which didn’t seem so attractive, but you hoped for coffee. Part of you knew he probably didn’t care about your devil fruit features, the large, fluffy fur that covered your chest probably wouldn’t bother him, aside from interfering with his stethoscope, but it felt… personal, it wasn’t something you typically showed off to others. 

     Sighing, Law gestured for you to come in, making you duck your head, looking at the floor as you slowly entered the room.

     “Since this is your first exam with me, I’m going to need you to take off your shirt.” Law said nonchalantly, starting to write in your very thin file. 

     “Is that… absolutely necessary, captain? I’m sure the physical would go just fine if I kept it on.” you said, shifting nervously.

     “Yes, it’s necessary, now take off your shirt and get onto the table.” Law demanded, making your heart jump. How many times had you dreamt similar things leaving his lips, though in entirely different contexts. Reluctantly, you removed your shirt, gently setting it aside as you hopped up onto the table. 

     Law sighed, he’d finally gotten you onto his damned table! Looking up, the young man froze. It wasn’t the fluffy fur that had caused him to stop though, rather the young man beneath the fur, shifting nervously on the table. His eyes ran over your body, muscular from working with the machinery, thin and lithe, your size betraying the strength he knew hid under your clothes. For the first time in many, many years, his pencil fell from his hand, clattering to the floor. The sound seemed to startle him out of his thoughts, quickly gathering himself together and starting the exam.

     “You’re a devil fruit user then?” he asked stoically, quickly grabbing one of the pencils from his pocket.

     “Uh, yeah, a special type of wolf user. It’s complicated.” you said, looking away. Those few simple words explained so much about you. Your nocturnal sleeping schedule, your playful demeanor and protectiveness, the Heart Pirate crew was your pack. Law simply nodded, returning to his check up, trying desperately to focus on the check-up and not your body. Not to say that he was the kind of man to only be attracted to a person’s body. Not that he was attracted to you!!! The physical seemed to last an eternity for the both of you, neither of you quite sure what to say or do until he was finished with the check-up. Almost as soon as he gave you the green light, you were bolting out of there, hurrying back to your room.

     Law sat in his chair, staring at the photo of you in your file. His heart was still pounding from seeing you and he felt something strange in the pit of his stomach, tightening and flipping. He was a healthy young man, he was no stranger to the body’s urges and needs, but he’d never felt this kind of desire towards another male before, never desired another male like he was desiring you. He briefly wondered if that fur was as soft as it looked. You’d parted the fluffy looking pile so he could listen to your heart, only able to lightly brush against a few stray hairs, but he hadn’t been able to get a real feel for it.

     Back in your room, you took deep breaths as you ran a brush down your chest, letting the feeling relax you. Feeling the bristles of the brush comb through your fur always brought a wave of comfort to you, allowing you to calm down from your recent encounter with your captain. It wasn’t something you did often, but if you were having a hard time relaxing, it always helped. Your mind was still playing through every second of the physical as you just sat there on your bed, brushing your fluffy mound of fur. He’d smelled like coffee… coffee and hand sanitizer like you’d expected. But also something else, something you couldn’t quite pin down, something that had had your body reacting in ways you really didn’t want it to while sitting in front of him. Vaguely you wondered what it would be like to have him brushing your fluffy chest, stroking your chest with the brush. Would he sit behind you as he ran it through your volumes of fur, his arms wrapped around you in a loving hold as he gently fingered the soft tufts? Maybe he’d kneel in front of you, admiring your fur as he gently pulled his fingers through the silky strands. Perhaps he’d rest his head on top of your chest, using your fur as a pillow, maybe you’d be able to get the insomniac to get some sleep. You might be nocturnal, but you’d gladly sleep through the night, or at least sit still through the night, if it meant letting Law sleep on your chest. Taking another deep breath, you set the brush down, your day dreams would have to wait for another time, it was getting close to dinner, meaning that you should start preparing for your usual night shift. It would be a welcome distraction from the events of the day, finding something so energizing about the night. Your mind could focus on the machinery and any malfunctions, allowing you to take your mind off your captain.

     Law looked at the time. Dinner would be announced soon, maybe he could find a way to sit near you? Could he find a medical reason to ask about the fur? He really wanted to see how soft it was. Shaking his head, he grumbled to himself, he was Trafalgar Law! The surgeon of death! What was he doing getting worked up over someone? Even if that someone was the most attractive person he’d ever seen! Between finding himself attracted to a male for the first time and all the things he wanted to do or say, things were about to get a lot more complicated.