#anyways. why are the most relatable songs always ones that sound like shit to other people. I remember I sent this song to a friend once and

[kimtranssexler]

It had been going so well and then I broke my eggshell and entered the world as a brontosaurus here’s my entire autobiography I was skinny at first then I got thick and then back to being skinny again like a brontosaurus life was devoid of purpose and so I joined the circus somehow they found it easy to ignore us people found it easy to ignore this brontosaurus you want to leave an impression you want to express an emotion you crave some attention and for this transgression you’ll be repayed when you fall and you fail and sink into depression

[lowkeyrobin]

Platonic Ghostbusters x social media manager! Reader?

oooo hell yeah!! ; thanks for requesting and I hope u enjoy :)

GHOSTBUSTERS ; social media manager

summary ; you run the official ghostbusters social media platforms

warnings ; language

word count ; 746

masterlist

Podcast wanted to run the official Ghostbuster social media's but was quickly turned down at that. They needed someone who could actually be on top of that kind of stuff and whatnot. So, Stanz made a deal with Podcast that they'd get a social media manager, and he could act as their teammate with that, basically. Giving them ideas, giving them video clips and extra details, etcetera.

Most of the others didn't see a real reason for a social media manager, but as long as it wasn't their money.

Trevor offered to just do everything himself, but that was obviously turned down as well. The teens all agreed not to let the adults run the account either. They didn't need millennial - Gen X / Boomer humor flooding the whole account and making them look bad.

And that's where you came in.

surprisingly, Pheobe was the one to find you. she's seriously the most chronically offline person ever so the fact she ever opened Instagram was a miracle in itself

lots of talking back and forth and meeting the original four three ghostbusters to get input, then meeting callie & garry and the teenagers

you actually figured out that you used to be friends with Lucky as well, damn

you had managed social media accounts before, but you'd recently quit a few of those because of labor laws being broken so, yknow

you quickly formed a bond with Lucky, Trevor, and Podcast. you were kind of close in age to all three of them and they were all invested in the public image for the brand

setting the Instagram up was genuinely the funnest thing ever

the four of you were chilling in the living room in the firehouse (since sleepover stuff, pheobe was in her room reading) and you had your laptop in your lap and the three of them over your shoulders

the amount of laughing and cackling got some scolding from callie upstairs

it took everything out of you to not make the first post a video of trevor being soaked in Slimer's slime (which had been recorded by Lucky just by coincidence as they were investigating the attic again)

the first three posts, which were pinned, all lined up to be like a banner kind of logo with the theme song in the back, and they all played the same video, clips of the og ghostbusters and how they grew and then the new ghostbusters

the tiktok is its own thing, you allowed trev, lucky, podcast (and pheobe) to run it, but everything had to be ran by you first because pr shit

but thankfully no boomer humor or slang is ever being put on those accounts

most of those people don't even know wtf the internet is anyways lol

stanz has a personal vendetta against you /hj after you posted a .5 of him for relatable promo. he had no idea what you were doing but it was criminal that you made his forehead look so much more bigger than it already was

Winston gives you a bunch of old pics to post to trending angst sounds as well LOL

let's not talk about that tiktok where you, lucky, and trevor dance to/remake submissive and breedable by smosh ft bbno$, okay?

^podcast and pheobe were behind the camera cackling the whole time

lots of random pic posts on the insta as well because why not (most of them are the teens looking awkward, callie, gary & lars trying to look like cool scientists, or venkman, stanz, zeddemore & melnitz being classic, sassy old people)

the socials are never professional whatsoever, it's fun but it's not heavily controversial or obvious that you're there as a pr manager basically or just to manage the socials

like man they don't have the time to look at all the comments, take all the advice, reply to fans, etc

I mean that wage ain't that bad either LMAO

trevor is always bitching about how you make more money than he does /lh

you're not just a representative to them, you're actually family. you're just cool like that

"bro y/n is such a mc I hate them" and you'll reply on your personal w a "says you, reality shifter" or smthn LMAO idfk

always reposting ghostbuster edits / fanart etc because fandom culture 🙏

also I can't get over the fact the ghostbuster theme song is canon now either. yk damn well that shit is plastered everywhere thanks to you 💀

"do the ghostbusters respond??" "stanz said he loves your dog" "HELP HSEIJDLAKE"

10/10 experience

[the-s1lly-corner]

Could you do the TADC cast x reader with a really heavy southern accent?

TADC cast x reader w/ a heavy southern accent!

hello i am back from my silly little lunch break i made a sandwich it was very yummy i need to find a new set of music to listen to while typing, as much as i love jack stauber i think im going to go insane if i hear baby hotline one more time... oddly enough not the first time that specific song has driven me nuts from being overplayed anyways idk side note idk what to do with gifs because i keep running out of TADC gifs and i got a reblog months back on a crp post that implies that gif makers get notified when you use their gifs?? is that true?? if so i am so so so sorry to the tadc gif makers TToTT also still gif related but i keep getting. jumpscared by butts n boobs anytime i open the gif thing i cannot keep doing this!!!!

CAINE:

i think he would find it pretty, like, i dont know how to explain it! i think he would possibly mimic some of your speech mannerisms. probably gives you a cowboy hat. i dont know what it is but i think southern accents, at least from what ive seen, is one of the most romanticized of american accents... maybe its the whole rugged cowboy thing thats commonly associated with it. what im trying to say that i think caine would romanticize it the same way, thanks to him not really having the experience of going out and interacting with people from the south

he finds the accent pretty

POMNI:

i dont think she would really notice it unless she is really trying to pay attention to what you say. but maybe thats just self projection because i myself dont really notice other peoples accents unless its very prominent, or they say something that sounds so different to how im used to hearing things. i feel it would be the same with pomni, but i dont think she would treat you any differently! wish i had more ideas but pomni and gangle are particularly hard for me to write for some reason

RAGATHA:

honestly i like to hc that she grew up in a southern small town before getting stuck in the digital world, but of course she wouldnt remember it... perhaps she would feel some sense of familiarity around you anyways, even if she cant pin down why.. i think that would be nice... she likes listening to you talk

JAX:

writing these out of order, but i think jax would be similar to caine in the regard that he would tease some of your speaking mannerisms. "yaint! yall'd've!" stuff like that... which... i can be mad about because im from the south and the two examples are in my vocabulary... hes not really saying anything thats incorrect, at least in my case

probably asks why your digital form isnt a cowboy, shit eating grin on his face

KINGER:

thinks it sounds nice! for once i dont have any ideas for kinger, which sucks because i love kinger TToTT

your words probably rub off on him, i can see him probably picking up on some of your terms n slang

kinger saying yall isnt real he cant hurt you

kinger saying yall:

ZOOBLE:

similar to pomni they dont notice until theyre forced to notice.. no but imagine your accent becomes more pronounced when you get mad, you start saying more stereotypically southern stuff that people associate. probably does a double take if you say a rather insane variant of 'yall' but otherwise doesnt see much point in pointing it out

GANGLE:

absolutely loves hearing you talk, similar to ragatha! while ragatha clings onto your words thanks to unknown familiarity, gangle just thinks your voice sounds like and soothing, comforting! i dont know what it is but hearing someone trying to comfort you with a heavy southern accent as well as using casual terms of endearment (whether you see this as romantic or platonic is up to you!) in this soft tender voice just always hits different for me. maybe i am guilty of also romanticizing southern accents

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2024: #23

23. POLAND Luna - "The Tower" 29th place

Decade Ranking: 85/153 [Above Luke Black, below Tvorchi]

POLITICS CLAIMS ITS FIRST VICTIM!!! ORACLE NATALIA WAS RIGHT!!

JK, I wish that were canon, but I cannot reverse-engineer our reality into a fiction where Serbia qualifies over Poland by a hair because they blanked them after Xi's visit hijacked the live broadcast.

Anyway, this section of the ranking is always chaotic and inconsistent. Bad songs with acts that made me lol, alongside kind of charming hopeless filler, alongside great songs with painfully bad lives.

Enter "The Tower". People been saying it's a bland, generic song and as is often the case in a democracy, the people are fucking WRONG!!!! Quirky indie wenches with brittle voices singing metaphorical build-me-up synthpop is MY safe zone and you won't make me leave it!

This came with the addition of Luna having the best warbled pronunciation since Maggie Burger ("BREAUXKEN BAWDEEZ SCAATERT FRUE MAHISTERRY" OB*SESSED*.) and being relatably bad at chess (same, girl.) I refused to believe Luna was birthed into this world. She emerged fully formed from a pod, (designed by the same crazy medical students that have now captured Slimane to use his live voice as ethical (for the patient) cancer therapy), created with the sole purpose of fitting the template of a Bubblecore Fave. Luna represents EXACTLY the sort of act I would love to overrate at my leisure.

Sadly... nope. It all kinda went the way of Roxen in Malmö. It was badly performed and badly mixed. I feel like a lot of Poles (I'd say "people" but do "Poles" count as such? Isn't selling your entire soul for the first bad banger a mandatory initiation for Eurofan Poles?) would just scapegoat Luna because THAT WITCH BEAT JUSTYNA, but I disagree. I sympathize with her and I think her team did her dirty. This Polish NQ was a group effort and Luna was only one cog in that machine. 🙂 Besides, Justyna deserved a break from the spotlight so she can enjoy her four remaining Christmases.

The capital mistake was to not recognize the level of performance maturity Luna had. She's fairly inexperienced and not the most powerful vocalist. She's also NOT a dancer. At the time of the contest she was at a level of "can hold a tune when standing still, on a good day."

So if she struggles to perform the act you've planned, somebody's got to step in and make it so she can perform it every time.

Simplify and practice it until she's able to do it.

and do not, for the love of Sennek, make her MOVE WHILE SINGING?!!

LET HER CONCENTRATE ON HER VOCALS, YOU SHITS.

WE ALL SAW HOW ROXEN MURDERIZED FOUR SONGS INTO AN EARLY GRAVE FOUR YEARS AGO AND THEN DIED THE FOLLOWING YEAR WITH AMNESIA UNDER AN ELABORATE CHOREO.

HOW HAVE SOME DELEGATIONS STILL NOT LEARNED THIS EASY, ESSENTIAL STAGING LESSON?!

IF YOUR PEFORMER CANNOT SING + MOVE, PICK ONE ("sing" unless she's Kaleen) AND STICK TO IT. FIND SOME OTHER WAY TO ADD IN MOMENTUM.

(lol sorry for the rant but i'm writing these late at night on whatever energy reserves I have left so I can to keep up with 1 update per day. Anger's all I have left. 😔)

It's not like the MV didn't offer an easy way into good Eurovision-friendly staging. Dear TVP, what exactly was wrong with this?

Just stick her in the middle of the cross on a podium, and drape finery around her until she resembles the titular tower. The song was about self-discovery and growth, and that would send the message across with minimal confusion.

But Poland went with what they went with and sigh. It was the opposite of Slovenia, really - it looked AMAZING but didn't really compensate from the fact that it sounded VERY BAD.

But if the staging looked that good, then why was it bad? Well, Poland had a concept, an idea and it could have worked, but it didn't.

Conceptually, this is good staging. The backdrops and floordrops were rad and the chess-themed styling worked gave it a beautiful and unique feel like we'd never seen before.

However, it came across as Poland making an attempt at directing the part of Europe that weren't on Xi Jinping's visit schedule away from their song, and this an erroneous display of disrespect. Visualize according to what the song needs in order to shine as a song. Don't obfuscate it with flourishes that don't synergize with it.

There were too many elements. You don't need three chess piece dancers, AND LED sorcery AND an elaborate choreography AND two giant rook props AND two fucking dress changes (one of which happened in wideshot because ofc it did).

The beauty of Art is knowing what elements you can keep and which you can (and should) take away. (does not apply to "minimalist art" which lands somewhere between "decoration" and "scam".) Simplify, rather than complicate. Don't thrown in all the ideas you have as a Hail Mary (notice that this route is often taken by desperate countries that are notoriously shit at Eurovision - Poland, Denmark, Malta, etc). Test out which elements work, and choose those that suit the artist the best.

Poland's failure is choosing excessive staging that pushed too hard for (1) a performer who was not ready to execute all the pieces (2) a really simple, fun basic synthpop song. It overwhelmed both Luna and "The Tower".

It was not Luna's fault. Not entirely. The Polish creative team had a series of lapses in judgement, and it ended up in a shock NQ that I didn't see coming until it actually happened. Even though I like the overal package (the song's really that good!) I didn't feel it was an undeserved elimination.

What killed Poland wasn't just inexperience, politics or overambition.

It was foremost a lack of confidence in their own product.

THE RANKING

[ablizmal]

hello!! this is my selfship introductory post!!!

(i’m posting two versions of this post— one with all these lovely little gifs, and one without, as i know some people can be sensitive to them <33)

my dearly beloved selfship is lawliz 🥰 (or lawlizzie if i want it to sound even cuter lol).

it’s of. uhhhhhh. me and the sweets loving detective from death note/// 👉👈

(no this isn’t suggestive, it’s just y2k in-universe and i LOVE y2k clothing lol)

some basics on the selfship!!!

we appear to be solar opposites in a bunch of different ways!

he’s calm and collected, always keeping things to himself unless he wants to ruin someone’s entire life and be painfully blunt about something HAKDJAHDSJS. whereas i seemingly am open, emotional, and spirited!!

my alias is “juliette rae ambers” (YES i created a full ass pseudo name dhsjdkajdjajajs). but to distinguish me irl and in-selfship-universe me, i’ll refer to my self insert as “juliette” whenever i talk about them.

L first met juliette through a past case, as they did some SHADY looking shit lmao. she’s just that eccentric and erratic <333

SO after spending some time with her, he eventually realizes they’re not apart of the case. like at ALL. but L basically goes “okay. wait, what the fuck’s wrong with her actually?” and continues to spend time with them because of that HAHAJDJSJSKSJS (again— juliette is eccentric and unpredictable.)

watari brings up how excited and affectionate juliette gets whenever he catches a glimpse of them together. L doesn’t get why watari is bringing this up. watari suggests that perhaps, juliette has a crush on L.

yeah, so L’s brain crashes DHSKDJSKDJAJHSAKS

he didn’t even think of that as a POSSIBILITY because he views himself as undesirable, ugly, creepy, etc (🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

so L brings this up with juliette. she denies it terribly (because they’re such a mess when they’re flustered), but after relenting, L reveals that he brought it up because he’s interesting in learning more about it. he has trouble identifying his own emotions and hasn’t been in love before, so he asks me to be apart of a study. it’s just information, essentially, letters detailing specific sensations and lovey dovey thoughts i get of him.

i agree to it because i LOVE psychology and have always wanted to be apart of a psychological study!

but at this point, L isn’t in love with me. he slowly falls over time, much to his mental debates on if it’s “ethical” or not. (he’s overthinking it!!! ALSO, WOW, L thinking about morals when it comes to someone?? they must be a ~special someone~ to him 🤭)

the stoic character who keeps to himself is (mutually) in love with the visually expressive, musically inclined jester!!! (does this make sense 😭)

juliette is with L throughout the entire kira case. the first time the taskforce meets L, she’s just standing to his right side (it’s a whole thing) in a lolita getup, so they assume, like watari, that juliette is a maid to L of sorts. but NO, juliette just fucking LOVES fashion lmaooooooo

ANYWAYS, what i’m trying to get to is that juliette loves music. it connects to them on such a deep level, and they love to sing and entertain. so sometimes, as a break/interlude in the kira case, she sings and plays songs. (they’re oddly captivating… just like a performer at an event.)

L can’t have the taskforce knowing him and juliette’s interpersonal relationship, so he and juliette have silently agreed to refer to each other as “associates” whenever the question comes up.

juliette talks out loud a lot as a habit. but, again, she likes to be entertaining first and foremost, so she only says things she thinks will be the most intriguing. she can keep to herself just fine. but L knows. he knows how intentional everything they do is. he can relate, and is intrigued about this part of them. and without fail, he listens, catalogues, and responds to everything she says U///U because he caaaaares 🥹🥹🥹 (much to light’s annoyance during the case lol)

once misa starts to reside in the taskforce headquarters, you fucking KNOW she and juliette would become ✨fashion besties✨ヽ(>∀<☆)ノ 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

juliette is very silly, laidback, loose, witty, thoughtful, and compassionate. will and has been promptly serious when the time calls for it.

juliette has forced L to watch rocky horror with them so. many. times. it’s now their couple movie of sorts aha <3

juliette cannot STAND light. he’s such an arrogant bitch baby, so she insults and burns him constantly (which L… enjoys 👀 JFKSJFKSJDKSJS, HE LOVES THE FACT THAT I CAN DEFEND MYSELF AND THAT I’M NOT A DOORMAT)

it’s so interesting to listen to these two talk. cause like, L is formal, a bit oddly polite in his wording, and naturally uses long words here and there. juliette, on the other hand, is very casual in speech. she casually swears, she refers to others with “dude,” “bro,” and “man,” and uses some slang words here and there. the taskforce members gawk at the sheer contrast sometimes.

so juliette’s mainly goth, right?? misa introduces her to the fashion, and she fucking loves it. her usual goth color combo is hot pink and black!!

…buuuuuut, juliette likes fashion in general, so sometimes she wear “pretty in pink” ass y2k outfits, then at other times glam rock-y, then gritty type of clothing, then elegant, they girly, then—

L loves to see whatever outfit they come up with (he for sure spoils the FUCK out of her hahajdjsjsja awwwwwwwww 😊 <333)

THEY’RE LITERALLY THE “plain boyfriend + alt girlfriend” COUPLE DHSKDHKADJKASJKASJAJA

i could go on and on, but this is an INTRODUCTORY post, soo……….. these are the basics of their dynamic!! i will post art, fics, and just ramble posts in general talking about it!!! :]

you can find more content in my “accidental emo boy meets intentional goth girl(gender neutral)” tag on here, OR on my new, selfship only account @lawliz-indulgence !

i love this little selfshipping community, xxx (✿ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)

[andi-kook]

Omg I was in a kind of situationship too 😭 it was around a year ago. Him and I were friends from fifth grade, and he was one of my first male friends. I had a crush on him back then but I never told him that. and he had surprisingly confessed that he too had a crush on me. But I still didn't tell him cuz I was too afraid and we were just too young for this shit lol.

However the next year I broke things off with my friend group and since he was also good friends with them, I thought he probably wouldn't want to talk to me anymore. So I decided to stay away from him from then onwards. And then covid happened too, which made it impossible to have any communication in person.

Fast forward to a few years later, he reached out to me on Instagram and we started chatting day and night about so many things. We cleared up misunderstandings like I thought he didn't want to do anything with me anymore and he thought my mom (a teacher in our school lol) forbade me from talking to him. He also started low-key flirting with me, complimenting here and there and saying corny shit 😂. However, a few months later his responses started getting dry and would keep me on sent for a long time. I didn't realize I was literally embarrassing myself by texting even after he once kept me unseen for days. He gradually ghosted me like that and a couple of months later unfollowed me.

Now he claims in front of his friend (that friend is my friend too) that he was just playing around and thought I got the hint. When he "realized I was quite serious about whatever was going on" he decided it was best to just ghost me. It's just funny now how he completely claims he never liked me when the things he'd say to me were so contradictory. It's been like a year now, I don't like him anymore but still feel hurt whenever I remember things.

Anyways sorry did I bore you with all this? Lol I didn't realize how much I wrote, got carried away 😭 sorry skip this if you want lol 😭😭

-💗

nooo you didn’t bore me!! i’m grateful you sent this in, lovely 💗!!!

ghosting someone is such a coward move for me. if you don’t think you’re going to work out, just say so. you owe that person that much especially if you’ve spend a significant amount of time with them that disappearing from their life, without any explanation as to why, will really affect them in a way that is indescribable. people who ghosts instead of just being honest are cowards!!!!

i’m sorry you had to go through that :( he sounds like an asshole my god and it’s worst because you considered him a friend before anything else. i definitely could relate to the whole instagram thing – that’s where my situationship started too – and going from talking to each day in and day out to just .... nothing. in hindsight, that really should have been our sign but alas, love is blind.

and fuck, him changing narratives to your friend????? SAME. he also claimed that i was the only one who liked him when he was the one who pursued me. that really broke my heart and the cherry on top was that i found that out through this other girl he was talking to while he was gradually ghosted me. that really gave me extreme anxiety on top of my already existing one and i always dreaded going to our campus and coming across them – even on social media which i don’t use anymore besides tumblr.

i’m proud of you for saying you don’t like him anymore. i wish i can say the same thing. the pain from a situationship is really greater than most because we don’t get any explanation why it ended. it just did. and when you do get an explanation, you’re fucking gaslighted beyond belief hahaha. it’s insane how a person can do that to another human being.

i really hope we heal from this unnecessary character development, 💗. i hope we never experience this again. we really don’t deserve it and i hope we realize that again and again until it’s etched in our brains.

may they never know peace every time we appear in their life whether through a dream, a song, a scent, a place, or when they simply go about their day.

[boobersandstuff]

Im bord and listening too fearless (tv) for the first time! Let's go!

Also before we start I'd like to stay that ik like 5 songs from (or less) and technically I grew up to fearless cuz I'd rewatch the music video for you belong with me over & over again lol.

Fearless: I think I've listened to some of this song before from tiktok, and that's about it. Nice guitar! I'm bopping. OH FEARLESS! ok this is a great song. Drive Slow? *atw flashbacks*. 8/10 good. Awww first kiss, ITS THE TIKTOK SOUND BITE!!!!!

15: I'm Turning 15 this year so let's see how much I relate. Tf is freshmen year? 9th grade? Ik the chorus from tiktok. Good tho. So far relate at 10. Or more 💅🏳️‍🌈 lol. No he isn't Taylor you have to wait....until your 30 to meet the one. :D. I don't get people who play or like sports. Exsptionaly ppl who date ppl who play sports, all the sporty ppl ik are dickheads and bigots! I like this song. I'm playing this all the time on my birthday. 8/10. Relaterbility 3/10. I'm not American in the 2000's ok?.

Love story: AHHHHHH I LOVE THIS SONG! now imma confess a sin......I only learnt this song exsited cuz of gacha and listening to it on a cd all the time at school. Also I didn't know it was a Taylor song. I thought it was random song from a gacha life video! Anyways 10/10 love it!!!

Hey Stephen: who's Stephen? What's this song about? Imma google real quick. Ah OK. It's abt her having a Crush on a guy and never admitting it. Maybe I just can't relate (cuz aro and I got the rizz) but I don't like it. Maybe I just like love songs like love story ect, but,.....nahhh Maybe if I listen to it more I'll like it (like folklore & evermore) but for now it's a 3-5/10. Not for me.

White hourse: she preformed this at the eras tour and somehow I was able to skip a bunch of videos abt it so I have 0 clue what this is abt. Why is the guitar so sad. Oh is this a squal to Hey stephen. Why am I laughing. Ik it's supposed to be sad but to go from pinning to heartbreak with no fucking in between and just innit, it's funny! I can't take it srsly. I like the chorus but still funny. 10/10 funnies love it.

You belong with me: this was the first ever Taylor swift song I listened too. As a kid I would just watch music videos on my ipad (yes im an ipad kid) that was downloaded and I would rewatch this one the most and I love it. Just for nostalgia and that it holds up now a days it gets a 10/10. Imma jam to this now.

Breath ft. Colbie caillat: yay new song :D. Also who's colbie? Never heard of them. Awwww. I like the guitar. :(((. So sad :(. Nothing to add other than I like it and it's so sad :(. 8/10.

Tell me why: I think ik this song? Probably from tt again. OH HELLO YEAH!!! BOP!!! I LOVE IT!!! IM DANCING LIKE MARGE SIMPSON RN. 10/10 LOVE IT!!!

Your not sorry: sad piano :((. Fuck this dude honestly! He can go fuck himself. >:((((. 7.5/10 I honestly don't know what to say. It's good.

The way I loved you: ok so this album Is abt a young love and what it's like. Also this is just a jam. SHNSJSK AIDINDGDUDND THE BEAT!!! I LOVE IT!!! FUCK THIS MAN!!! FUCK HIM!!!! I LOVE IT!!! D: SJJSJSJJSNENXYIDNAJLMDHDUXNXDY. 100000000/10. ❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍💖💗💓. SHES SO IN LOVE THAT SHE HATES HIM AWWWWWWW.

Forever & always: awww. Cuteeee. This is definitely a song to play at weddings. Bopping. I need this at the eras tour NOW!!! 8.5/10.

The best day: so far I love this album. It's so good!!! Also as soon as I finish this I have 2 albums left, debut & red. Awwww. Idk what to talk about it's a good song tho. This album & all her contry songs are just fairy tales but taylors version. Just saying it is. Idk what that implies or means but that's my observations. 7.5/10 good! Just looked at the spotify banner in the background for the song. Why is it small Taylor? What is this song abt? I feel bad.

Change: AHHHHH! sorry I just got jumpscared I'm autistic. Ik a shit joke anyways. Bop. OK I FOUND ANOTHER GREAT ONE!! OH IK THIS SONG!!! ANOTHER TIKTOK!!! I LOVE IT!!! 10/10. Great edit music. This is giving long live, yoyok, ect. Love it.

Jump then fall: random thought um....is any of these love songs abt j*** may**......cuz doesn't speak now come next after this album...oh no... fuck. This is typical Taylor. Bopping. 8/10. This is such a long ass album. I'm skipping fuck it idc.

Untouchable: guitar.... nice. What's this song about? This is sad, I love it :( :). It's giving Taylor talking abt her sad things. Awwww it's abt the human experience abt wanting things that's out of our league. 8/10.

Come in with the rain: Taylor is a hopeless romantic & so am I!!!! I love, love...but I also don't get it sometimes. This album is hopeless romantic for teens! 8/10.

Superstar: so her? Lol. I wonder how her relationships with fellow like classmates where when she started getting big? Probably awkward and bad. 6/10 I've heard this same type of song like 10 times now. It gets boring quickly.

The otherside of the door: I've honestly got nothing the rest is just ratings unless I achally have something to say. 6/10.

Today was a fairytale: ik this song, again from tiktok. Very good song. 9/10. Nice lyrics.

You all over me: IDC!!! IVE HAD ENOUGH LOVE SONGS FOR 1 ALBUM JESUS!!! 0/10 >:( SKIP!!!

Mr perfectly fine: this was at the eras tour, time to finly hear it. I was abt to say how this is another love song but then it had a very dear John lyic & now I'm crying. Who tf is this bitch?! I wanna talk to him I swear no harm will come to him (in a video game) :) /s. Taylor 😭😭😭😭😭. I'm crying is she ok!!! I WANNA KICK THE SHIT OUT OF THIS MAN!!!! IS THIS JOHN AGAIN!? OH FUCK HIM!!! OR SOMEONE ELSE IDK!!! HE CAN DIE!!! *SOBS* I WANNA KILL HIM!/10 OR 1000000/10. Wait she dated Joe jones? I didn't know that also he can go fuck himself.

We were happy: sadness. :(. 10/10.

That's when: 8/10.

Don't you: 5/10.

Bye bye baby: 0/10 I'm burnt out.

Ok so....I don't like fearless (tv). Maybe I'll like it in time but listening to it in 1 go omg I hated it. I like how she structures her newer music and this just being long af & have 50 love songs & the rest abt break up songs just....I hate it! I wanna song that let's me see who Taylor is! Not who she dated & broke up with! Plus I got tired of the same fucking songs over & over again! If I listened to them by themselves with like a song like yoyok then maybe I'd like it more. Whatever I alr know that all the fellow swifties who see this are gonna kill me but whatever.

[baekhvuns]

Good morning! (To me)

Atinys out for blood, it was funny at first and the antis went wild so they had to be clowned, but some fans are doing TOO much, calm down. Let them deal with the copying. But I do hope Vata says something, ideally something that won't be dumb and disrespectful

That previous fan call was so frustrating to watch, but the Atiny reassured him and Hwa also said he liked longer hair (then why did he cut it off not so long after siydishdkshsjduhdj but he went pink so it's fine). Look I care about hair, it's one of my personality traits and I may talk shit sometimes, but I would never say it anywhere near the members...

UNI AU PLEASE YESSSSS - says me who still gets uni related nightmares despite being out of school for a while. Not a furry at least not in THAT way alrite!!! I'm just an animal lover and pretty boys enthusiast, so what if we combine those two 🤗

💖

You got me at Park Seonghwa in red, because I love red and I love Seonghwa 💋 16:58 let's never forget and I thought we would end it with just one Shinee song, but my Shawol baby did not disappoint

Mf I'm gonna haunt him in that house I can tell we're not gonna let each other "live" square up ghost Tae

Nothing in Twilight screamed ROMANCE to me, like?! Don't get me started on that dumbfuck Jacob especially in later parts, and of course the ugly baby 😭 most shows suffer from too many seasons syndrome, it's so sad. I mean yeah understandable, they wanna milk it, there's a demand, but sighhh. Omfg that TB mention, it's creepy, but happens TOO OFTEN, the mind reading or perhaps spying is out of control ☠

The evils of SM lmao, imagine if Taemin, Key, Kai, Seulgi, Taeyeon (I would add Changmin, have you heard his song... Devil?) performing together 😳😳😳😳

Wdym Hwa doesn't like Y/N... you're right, he LOVES her <3 why are there so many guys please, all simps? But the one who is supposed to simp hates her??? And does Y/N like Hwa? Well I love ETL, so 😘 Y/N as Taemin's lore - sexy of her

Sunmi's recent concept, the ginger mermaid hair I DIED. Right, miss Chungha, I'm not that into her recent stuff unfortunately, but she's gooooood anyways.

Poor Y/N I just know I'm gonna become her biggest apologist and if bitch boy royal guy Hwa doesn't want her I'll take her as my witch wife. I'm looking forward to the fic, because it seems like there's a lot to unpack.

I know Villain Dies is so nice, actually the whole album is really good, Tomboy's rap was questionable, but the whole release is solid. One of my faves in 22 actually. Songs with villain in the title always slap: Idle, Pixy, Key, SNSD...

FLAME OF LOVE SAYONARA HITORI?!?!?! MY LOVES 😭😭😭😭

I just saw that art you linked *mind reading* it's soooo good and made me think of Duke or King

Btw Sunmi and Taemin, A LONGER COLLAB WHEN. I keep coming back to this. I like watching award shows with friends, because we just hang out and it's less boring that way, but on my own it's a struggle lmao

Mingi era sure it is and it has been since DV. I was like "gotta collect a lot of Mingi since he was absent" and the fact he looked especially good was a bonus and he's been looking saaaaauuuuur goooood ever since

That San x Jueyon article is so dumb sjsgiagsidgejsjs it's just their hairstyles I-

No because I showed Hwa one of my cats once 😭😭😭😭 I'm obsessed with the sound he makes in the first video, it's so fucking cute his lil "HAHA"

And what about my bodyguard Seonghwa? Do I get two?

HOOOOLYY SHTITIS SOOHYUK WHAT IS THIS AND WIDUKSHEUWAHABHA Eunwoo is there too? Jesus how did I miss this - DV 💖

hi hello!!!

Good morning! (To me)

good almost night (to me)

(and you)

Atinys out for blood, it was funny at first and the antis went wild so they had to be clowned, but some fans are doing TOO much, calm down. Let them deal with the copying. But I do hope Vata says something, ideally something that won't be dumb and disrespectful

atiny and now a whole idol 😭😭 nO EXACTLYYYY some are doing too much 😭😭 i understand the emotion behind it & the way it reached the choreographers too,,, but i saw SOME going above and bEYOND,, killed the entire vibe,,, vata didn’t say anything but a team member of his did?? wasn’t vata all quick to call out someone for plagiarism WHERE THAT GO NOW VATA AND HWA

That previous fan call was so frustrating to watch, but the Atiny reassured him and Hwa also said he liked longer hair (then why did he cut it off not so long after siydishdkshsjduhdj but he went pink so it's fine). Look I care about hair, it's one of my personality traits and I may talk shit sometimes, but I would never say it anywhere near the members...

some literally do not deserve those,, if u don’t like something just keep it to urself??? also some atinys say “ateez after they keep getting the same 10 people each fancall” WHICH IDK IF THEY UNDERSTAND THAT SOME PEOPLE (not one of the 10’s) POST ABOUT THEIR FANCALLS ON LINE 😭😭😭 SOME THINGS ARE PRIVATE,,, no ur so right, talking shit but keeping it to urself and jot saying it in front of idols is basic manners 😭😭😭

UNI AU PLEASE YESSSSS - says me who still gets uni related nightmares despite being out of school for a while. Not a furry at least not in THAT way alrite!!! I'm just an animal lover and pretty boys enthusiast, so what if we combine those two 🤗

I WILL VERY MUCH TRY FOR IT !!!! i recently was watching 18 again the kdrama version and kept seeing seonghwa 😭😭😭 LMFAOOOO DO U GET THOSE RANDOM THOUGHTS ABOUT AN ASSIGNMENT BEING DUE BUT THEN U REALIZE UR NOT IN UNI AT ALL 😭😭😭🤚🏼 KFJWKDBWK SAY WHAT U WANT ITS CONFIRMED UR A FURRY,,, ur saying alpha hwa???? hear me out, fallen angel hwa <3 taemin’s lore

💖

You got me at Park Seonghwa in red, because I love red and I love Seonghwa 💋 16:58 let's never forget and I thought we would end it with just one Shinee song, but my Shawol baby did not disappoint

SEONGHWA IN RED IS ILLEGAL, red is such an illegal colour like how can u be so sexy and bad at the same time,,, GBQKFHEK HE WILL FORVER REMEMBER HIS ROOTS AS A SHAWOL IM BEGGING TO SEE HIM NEXT TO TAEMIN FBWNDBE

Mf I'm gonna haunt him in that house I can tell we're not gonna let each other "live" square up ghost Tae

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 ITS A ETL BESTIEEEE ETLL !!!!!!! TWO GHOSTS STUCK IN ONE ROOM?? BOUND TO FALLING IN LOVE <3

Nothing in Twilight screamed ROMANCE to me, like?! Don't get me started on that dumbfuck Jacob especially in later parts, and of course the ugly baby 😭 most shows suffer from too many seasons syndrome, it's so sad. I mean yeah understandable, they wanna milk it, there's a demand, but sighhh. Omfg that TB mention, it's creepy, but happens TOO OFTEN, the mind reading or perhaps spying is out of control ☠

NO SERIOUSLY WHERE IS THE ROMANCE IN TWILIGHT 😭😭😭 STOP THE BABY STOPP GHWKFHWK HOW CAN THEY DO IT SO DIRTY 😭😭🔫🔫 NO THE TB MENTION CAUGHT ME SO OFF GUARD THIS SHOW SOUNDS SO INTERESTING BESTIE I MIGHT GIVE IT A WATCH,, the fbi spy really said “for you” huh 😭😭

The evils of SM lmao, imagine if Taemin, Key, Kai, Seulgi, Taeyeon (I would add Changmin, have you heard his song... Devil?) performing together 😳😳😳😳

THE EVILS OF SM STOOPPP AND HES CHANGMIN FBWNDB THE DILF OF KPOP,, no bc changmin’s chocolate + lie with chungha is so good THE HARMONIES IN DEVIL IS CRAZY GOOD sm and their soloists are so top notch <3 omg do u rmr when henry taemin and kyuhyun performed trap together that but with all of sm’s evils ,, THE NEWEST EDITION TO SM EVIL IS TAEYONG WITH HIS GHOST

Wdym Hwa doesn't like Y/N... you're right, he LOVES her <3 why are there so many guys please, all simps? But the one who is supposed to simp hates her??? And does Y/N like Hwa? Well I love ETL, so 😘 Y/N as Taemin's lore - sexy of her

bestie no one likes y/n except maybe hongjoong <3 and maybe someone from hwa’s side <3 national traitor after all ☺️ ALL OF THEM SIMPS TRULY san tho 😮‍💨 y/n has a complicated history with hwa tho never mentions it,,, hwa is about to be married BESTIE WHY WOULD HE THINK OF SOMEONE ELSE FBWMFJWK y/n is so fr sexy my favourite yn out of all

Sunmi's recent concept, the ginger mermaid hair I DIED. Right, miss Chungha, I'm not that into her recent stuff unfortunately, but she's gooooood anyways.

RIGHT THE GINGER MERMAID,, when sunmi does lore in her cb’s it always slaps,,, chungha!!!! her company doing her so dirty but her vocals are so so stunning, love me out loud on her recent album is insanity

Poor Y/N I just know I'm gonna become her biggest apologist and if bitch boy royal guy Hwa doesn't want her I'll take her as my witch wife. I'm looking forward to the fic, because it seems like there's a lot to unpack.

FBWKDHSK EVERYONE WILL BE YNS BIGGEST APOLOGIST until u guys learn about seonghwa <3 JDBWKDBK BOLD OF U TO ASSUME BITCH BOY ROYAL GUY IS NOT GONNA BE OBSESSED WITH THE IDEA OF MISS YN,, a lot to unpack for sure!! excited to finally start it after a long time!!

I know Villain Dies is so nice, actually the whole album is really good, Tomboy's rap was questionable, but the whole release is solid. One of my faves in 22 actually. Songs with villain in the title always slap: Idle, Pixy, Key, SNSD...

it really is! i have that and the danceracha song on repeat atm 😭😭 we do not talk about that rap in this household

FLAME OF LOVE SAYONARA HITORI?!?!?! MY LOVES 😭😭😭😭

EXACTLY EXACTLY EXACTLY 😭😭😭😭 EVERYTHING ABOUT THOSE SONGS 😭😭😭 LITERAL ART THE JACKPOT SM HIT WITH THOSE SONGS BEING GIVEN TO TAEMIN

I just saw that art you linked *mind reading* it's soooo good and made me think of Duke or King

omg a TB moment i see 👁👁 it really did but now imagine deonghwa as a general

Btw Sunmi and Taemin, A LONGER COLLAB WHEN. I keep coming back to this. I like watching award shows with friends, because we just hang out and it's less boring that way, but on my own it's a struggle lmao

WE NEED THEM TOGETHER ON A WHOLE SONG SM PLEASE MAKE IT HAPPEN 😭😭😭 kdnwkd im quite the opposite of u i prefer watching it alone bc my friends keep tALKING 🔫 I NEED TO HEAR THE FALSETTO PLS STOP TALKING 😭😭

Mingi era sure it is and it has been since DV. I was like "gotta collect a lot of Mingi since he was absent" and the fact he looked especially good was a bonus and he's been looking saaaaauuuuur goooood ever since

am i seeing a “mingi dv anon” era approaching????? what do u think is mingi’s best hair,,, his blond for me just hits so hard like he’s a natural blond

That San x Jueyon article is so dumb sjsgiagsidgejsjs it's just their hairstyles I- //// No because I showed Hwa one of my cats once 😭😭😭😭 I'm obsessed with the sound he makes in the first video, it's so fucking cute his lil "HAHA"

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 THE WAY IT STARTED TO TREND TOO NDBDNDBDN omg WHAT DID HE SAY TO UR CAT 😭😭😭🤚🏼🤚🏼 PLS DID HIS EYES GO ALL ROUND AND BOBA 😭😭😭 park seomghwa needs to be protected at all costs im fighting anyone who troubles this man 🔫

And what about my bodyguard Seonghwa? Do I get two?

sanhwa!bodyguard x reader…

HOOOOLYY SHTITIS SOOHYUK WHAT IS THIS AND WIDUKSHEUWAHABHA Eunwoo is there too? Jesus how did I miss this - DV 💖

THIS IS A WHOLE VISUAL MASTERPIECE BESTIE,,, IF HE DOESNT HAVE A LEAD ROLE 🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫

i would like to offer u this idiot today <3

😭😭😭🤚🏼

us but with seonghwa and a rando kid <3

🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️

a uquiz

[afro-elf]

fine, i’ll elaborate on my thoughts about tylor sift but they will be disorganized

disclaimer: i know a few people will read this and be like “op is a hozier fan can she really talk about the cultural obsession with mediocre white art?” and the answer is yes because a) i’m black and i have an english degree so can do whatever i fucking want, b) hozier is a better artist than taylor objectively, like his mediocre tracks would be considered her great ones, and c) the comparison of taylor to hozier is part of the problem Genuinely because i don’t even think white people like half the music they listen to, they just don’t wanna be left behind, we’ll get into this later. i’m sorry to everyone who is tired of hearing about him but hozier will be returning later in this post jsfglsjlgldsjlfd

second note: read this

i don’t just dislike taylor because she’s white. i don’t dislike taylor because she’s a woman. i don’t dislike her because she writes mean and petty lyrics about past relationships and people who wronged her. i don’t dislike taylor because her public circle of friends is almost exclusively blonde white celebrities with their own laundry lists of issues that includes ryan reynolds and blake lively who are poster children for white privilege and pseudo-excellence if i’ve ever seen them. i dislike taylor because the amalgamation of all of those things is so exemplary of a huge problem i have with the music industry in general but also like american society

fuck it, numbered list!

1. taylor swift consistently releases the same mediocre album but in different colors. every album is the same lyrically and tonally. her body of work rarely goes very far above “good for taylor swift”. folklore as both title and musical aesthetic is irrelevant to the actual content of the album, which is just every taylor swift album except set to folk pop and with a bit more cussing, congrats for baby’s first swear. i’ve seen folklore compared to much better bodies of work and even propped up by stans as album of the year, a distinction that rina sawayama and chloe x halle will be battling it out for if there is any justice in the world at all. the fact that she is allowed to do this and still be considered great when this is something that even white male artists are butchered critically for... astounds me. like we all know how well received all of coldplay’s similar sounding albums are.... Come on. 

2. i don’t think taylor or her work is particularly feminist and yet for some reason every time she frowns an army of white women brings her kleenex. i’m not saying taylor’s anger has always been unjustified, but her feminism to me has always felt like “i can do whatever a man can do” feminism, which is utterly fucking useless to me as a black woman. it’s only useful to her because as a wealthy, white, straight, cis white woman her ONLY obstacle in life is her gender. and if she just didn’t have that tricky little bitch then maybe people would take her seriously. like, just think about her music video for the man... what was the thesis of that? what was the point of that? with all of her privileges she’d just be gaining a single extra privilege. she’s a blonde blue eyed thin white girl, the world kisses her feet. i have no interest in proving myself any better or any worse than white men, they are not the standard for how a person should be treated, they’re cautionary tales, and white women are too. i think taylor capitalizes off of white woman victimhood, and it’s all over her writing style. even when she’s trying to be empowered, like in mad woman for example, there is this tone to it of victimization, poking the bear, unleashing the beast if you will. she invokes the imagery of salem witches and even more boldly chooses a noose to write about in the song which is..... surely going to be a white tumblr staple for many gifsets to come but holy shit is it hollow. she also tends to come back to teenage memories in her music and she’s thirty. i don’t think about being seventeen unless i’m being held at gunpoint but she seems to think about it All The Time. and part of this is to keep herself young, at least in her music, which only further ingrains this image of fragile teeny bopper taylor into the mind of the listener, fueling her victim image. this imagery and language means nothing because the world always rallies around taylor. even when she was the butt of jokes for not being beyonce (which she is not and never can be) and writing about her exes (which she does), she was largely supported by the industry and by critics. look at how many fucking awards she has!

3. folk and indie and alternative music is in a moment of transition, where musicians of color are getting the chance to really speak about how they’ve been treated in these overwhelmingly white circles and create their own standards and their own voices. and for taylor swift to swoop in with aaron dessner and jack antonoff fantano and almost reassert that mid-2010s indie sound as The Sound of folk pop in the popular consciousness.... it makes me violent! it! makes! me! violent! 

4. back to hozier! finally, i wanna talk about white standom, fandom, bandom, and womandom. i often see these very superficial comparisons between hozier and taylor (and hozier and florence and hozier and stevie nicks and hozier and whatever other white woman in fashion) and they frustrate me for more than one reason. i know that hozier has met taylor and said she’s cool, which is nice of him and he’s a nice man, but i’m not a nice man so i’m going to just say it: none of the people who have made those posts have listened to more than four hozier songs and it shows. the reason why this matters is because these posts catch on and create an image and preconception of hozier’s music that is divorced from reality and divorced from his influences and most importantly divorced from the deliberate and reverent blackness of his musical style. hozier has his white male privilege in the industry for sure but he’s not as towering of a giant as taylor and taylor’s music is an unsalted chicken, plain oatmeal, white paint drying on a white wall, a stick of unflavored gum. her music is so white it told me that its dad is a cop. i am, as a black hozier fan, exhausted with having to share space with white women who don’t know why hozier’s music kicks me in my lungs sometimes and think that taylor mentioning a tree ONCE in her 3 minute acoustic guitar slog about whatever suburb is the same when it simply is not. i swear some of you are pretending to love taylor because your friends love her and you don’t wanna be left out of the hot new musical discourse but she’s only the hot new musical discourse CONSTANTLY because she’s a white woman, she’s almost the Perfect white woman. like if someone asked me to describe a white woman, it would be taylor swift. her position at the top of the musical pyramid among people who eclipse her musically, vocally, and lyrically is only allowed because she’s The Perfect White Woman. she’s an ideal. white girls relate to her immediately because of it and now we have this unshakable mob of unbearable white women who think that the world has wronged someone who literally wrote fanfiction about the rich oil heiress white woman who owned her rhode island mansion before her aklghlghdhlgs it drives me fucking NUTS 

anyway that’s all. if you made it this far, listen to adia victoria, kaia kater, samantha crain, valerie june, kelsey lu, corinne bailey rae, brittany howard, kimya dawson, japanese breakfast, cold specks, left at london, rhiannon giddens, aisha badru, shea diamond, nadine shah, xenia rubinos, karen o, mirel wagner.... Anyone

[yostresswritinggirl]

@butterfly-mochi​ Rewrote this freaking thing thrice because it keeps getting deleted wth tumblr agjvahkfajkvk- I enjoyed writing it a lot tho and since I’m too weak to the characters I ended up writing for all of them (except for Sucrose, im sorry bb huhu, I ran out of brain power). This is my first time writing for so many of them in one go so please excuse me for any mistakes or blandness ywy thank you for letting me write for my baby Ganyu too hhhhh

Universe Reversal 2

Genshin Impact Character Reader and Modern Players with Zhongli, Childe & Ganyu (how they simp for you) (event masterlist / Part 1 / Part 3)

Zhongli the F2P

The most relatable out of the bunch because this man is still broke and can only rely on the primogems he can farm. And he had a LOT. The one thing he doesn’t have a lot on, however, is his luck.

So how did he manage to pull you?: Well after exhausting all his primogem on your banner with nothing but weapons and other characters, he has lost his resolve. But by some weird luck, there was a character bug that was fixed and in his email was the almighty consolation primogem. Enough for ONE pull. And by the Gods he FINALLY got you.

He’d nonchalantly post his screenshot of pulling you using a single acquaint fate in his friend group without any words and everyone else just loses their shit. “You got them in one pull?!” “Yeah” A riot.

This was partnered with the fact that not only is Zhongli an F2P player, but also barely has any five star characters.

He looks calm and apathetic over the news, but behind the screen he’s exhausted and relieved, silently livid.

He has no primogems left to squeeze for a constellation so you’re instead pampered with the best weapon suitable for you (because that’s all he keeps getting).

Zhongles spends most of his time farming for materials to quickly level you up, unlocking all your stories and voiceline, but he fucked up on your build (his artifacts are messy).

He follows communities, forums and videos regarding your character to know all the things he needs to perfect your build. You can barely make a dent against normal mobs, so he knew he was doing something VERY wrong.

Is the type of person to keep refreshing the page for new content, very updated.

Ask him a question about your character and he’s gonna bring you the word vomit that is his research. He’s not gonna stop- probably accidentally developed a copypasta for you.

Also follows your VA in both Tiktok and Twitter to indulge in every bit of content. He also has that screenshot of his pull saved and locked.

On his birthday, a friend of his gifted him a chibi plushie of you and he has treasured it ever since, treating and handling it like its a figurine.

“It is merely pure luck and grace from the gacha gods that I got this character, and I will make sure that they know I am very grateful for this fortune.”

Favorite Voiceline: Birthday Message

Childe The Whaler

This lucky wealthy bastard with no remorse for his money whales for EVERY character. He’s making a collection, which is to get all the characters, especially the five stars. So when your banner finally popped up, he’s gonna square up and trigger a whole ass meteor shower.

How he pulled you: Money. His luck with this games are actually not the best so he always compensates with money, he got you halfway through the first failed pity, almost giving him a heart attack that he might actually break the bank just to get you.

And then he pulls more to raise your constellation lol.

The first thing he does is look over your character info and read through it all; constellation infos, your base stats, artifact compatibility.

At the end when he’s maximized everything, he would then focus on playing around with your character *coughs climbing noises coughs*

He thought you’d just be another part of his collection but playing with your character was very enjoyable and in-line with his playstyle- oops 100 screenshots with the Kamera-

Any and all merchandise that he fancies would be his, and he’s definitely flexing it to the other sweetie nerds who call themselves simps. He’s fighting for the simping title, and he’s currently neck and neck with this fanartist in Pixiv.

Speaking of that fanartist, he definitely commissioned an expensive and detailed portrait of you, full rights and everything. No one else was allowed to use it but him.

Was also the first one with the audacity to call out your VA to create an account on Tiktok to create more content with your voice. He was successful.

His obssession also comes in the form of self-indulgent contents, and had been keeping track of the ship wars happening. During conventions, he cosplays as the character shipped with you the most (or the character he thinks should end up with you).

Silently scrutinizing those who cosplay you, only ever taking pictures with/of the best looking one, sorry haha

Definitely flaunts that you are his waifu/husbando and will fight for best girl/best boy during debates or polls. Has mobilized the community to vote for you once. He’s very persuasive.

“Hm? Why I’m just the best collector in the game, and I am more than happy to let everyone know that I am their number one fan haha, everyone who claims otherwise is definitely wrong!”

Favorite Voiceline: More About (Y/N) I-IV, (Y/N)’s Hobbies...

Ganyu the Employed

Ganyu, our dearest overworker, is one of the players in the older stage who actually has a job but still plays Genshin for their past times. The gorgeous sceneries and the music is her main focus in playing the game, not much of a try-hard but still decent in the combat mechanics.

How she pulled you: You came home within 50 pulls! And you appeared again after another 10 pull! Ganyu was so SHOOKT and so distressed because oh goodness, what does she do? She doesn’t know anything much about you!

Will rewatch your three trailers to try and understand your skills better, ended up saving the soundtracks from them because that was such a nice trailer music! Tnbee gains a new follower!

Ganyu will take a while before she can properly play or build you up because she’s so busy with work, she only ever plays when she feels fully done with her work.

During her break she plays with your character while multi-tasking on eating, earphones plugged in and sight on the phone as she farms materials and artifacts for you.

The moment she gets more help from her player friends tho, holy shit, you just ended up being so OP. She had so many good artifacts and weapons for you because she didn’t know what they were for before.

She loves how you’re so easy to use and can easily solo the enemies and even the boss fights. A huge breather, because now Ganyu can cheese the battles that takes a while, to give her more time to focus on the storyline and lores.

Since Ganyu plays for the story and aesthetic, she’ll find you almost always in her team. Still very proud of her pull, she makes the best screenshots of your fights or in the best angle through exploration.

Treasures you so much she starts talking to her phone- “Ah, no, please don’t fall.” “There’s violetgrass up there, let’s try and get it”

Blushes everytime you produce a sound when climbing, doesn’t change you anyways tho

Hums to your trailer music while working, and if permitted, would have the song on repeat while she buries herself in work. She finds it really refreshing and the time she spends in work miraculously flies by fast when she gets lost in the sound.

At one point, when she was given a day-off or if the convention was on her free time, she attends to look for cosplayers of you and take a picture. No one rejects her because she’s so adorable and cute when asking shyly.

Had brought a decent amount of merchandise, preferably the functional/practical ones like a phone cover, mug or keychain. Also has an earphones clamp with your little chibi self as the holder.

When asked, she would shyly announce that she likes your character the most.

“Their character theme and music really soothes me during work, it feels nice to have them, and I have not once regretted ever pulling for them. They are the best.”

Favorite Voicelines: Good Night/Afternoon..., About Us, Something To Share..., Interesting Things...

so enjoyable...

@moaa @zelos-simp @legionqueensav @dandelion-dreams @snackgod @rxsalinee

[somethingpoetichere]

lovebug- caliban imagine

sup. fic inspired by my favorite song in THE world. not as soft mushy as it may sound I promise caliban is a nice lil sarcastic SHIT with a big ole crush. mild sabrina bashing but its funny in context and I think it’s the way family behaves. reader is a Spellman, not a witch but DOES know about the supernatural/is part of the supernatural world. here with my once in a blue moon post lol. feedback would be appreciated!

called her for the first time yesterday

finally found the missing part of me

felt so close but you were far away

left me without anything to say

Caliban was not an idiot- he knew not to underestimate the Spellman half-witch that had gone and declared herself queen of hell. So he’d taken the liberty of learning everything he could about her, noting her habits and schedule and the people she surrounded herself with.

And then he found you.

You weren’t a witch- at least, he hadn’t found your name in his diligent searching through the Book of the Beast- but you were something. That he was sure of. There was something slightly off about your presence, tinged a little glittery, though not altogether unpleasant.

No, not unpleasant at all, he mused as he watched you make your way towards your car. Tucked into a little yellow sundress, you stood out like a ray of sunshine in the wave of doom-and-gloom that hallmarked high school. The school bell rang out behind you, and Caliban felt his knees go disgustingly weak as you smiled brilliantly at Sabrina through the crowd.

It was a stupid, stupid decision that Caliban would never have made in the right state of mind, but he reasoned that pissing off Sabrina was validation enough to get your attention. He ducked into your path on purpose, taking advantage of your momentary distraction as he gently bumped into you. oops.

You collided with a solid wall, books tumbling out of your hands as strong arms reached out to steady you. You let out a surprised yelp at the collision, peeking up curiously as the wall you’d hit laughed.

Oh, well that was a sight for sore eyes.

The golden haired stranger holding you was, well, gorgeous. Bright blue eyes peered down at you as he grinned, and you felt the whole world shutter around you. You’d definitely been watching too many soap operas with your auntie, but goddamn it if you weren't positively putty.

“Hi there, stranger.” You giggled nervously, and Caliban suddenly remembered he’d had his arms around you for far too long to be acceptable. He reluctantly retreated, feeling something claw a little uncomfortably in his chest.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” He apologized, moving to pick up your books as you bent down to retrieve them. He ran a hand through his hair in barely concealed bashfulness, unsure of why he felt so... unsettled, all of a sudden. 

“It’s alright, my head was in the clouds.” You waved off his apology, accepting the books he offered you with a grateful smile. “Are you new here? I don’t think we’ve met.”

“He’s new here!” Sabrina’s shrill voice interrupted, training her icy glare on Caliban, who fought back a smirk. “This is Caliban- he’s from... Australia! Yeah, down under!”

“Oh, I can show you around tomorrow! I know how scary it can be to be new here.” You patted his arm sympathetically, ignoring Sabrina’s stream of indignant protests. “I was with student council all day. If you’re a senior, we probably have most of the same classes.”

Caliban had shit to do. Caliban had trials to plan and souls to torture. But you were looking at him- all warmth and sunshine, and Sabrina’s look of pure horror only sweetened the deal.

“I’ll see you in class tomorrow then, sunshine.”

so worth it.

now i'm speechless, over the edge

i'm just breathless

i never thought that i'd catch this love bug again

hopeless, head over heels in the moment

i never thought that i'd get hit by this love bug again

Caliban didn't understand why the mortals all bemoaned high school as hell on earth. It certainly wasn't so bad once you got past the wave of body spray and the questionable cafeteria food. In fact, darting to class with a pretty girl beside him was pretty enjoyable, all things considered. 

You’d spent the day introducing him to the other students, passing him silly notes in class, and had even tugged him from the lunch room to hang out with your friends in the library. He learned that you pretty much did it all- student council, cheerleader, top of your class- all while managing to somehow know the name of everyone you passed with a smile in the halls. You were silly and sweet— smart as all hell with a wit that certainly kept the clay prince on his toes.

and he was smitten.

The groan that escaped your painted lips was delightfully sinful as you slumped in the seat beside him in english class. “I hate Romeo and Juliet. How do two people fall in love in a few days anyhow? And Mrs. Willows always makes us reenact the scenes, and it’s so corny.” The blush that colored your cheeks as he looked at you in concern was something he did his best to commit to memory- cheesiness be damned, Caliban was enjoying himself far too much.

Caliban smirked, skimming through the booklet he’d been passed as the teacher droned. The prince of hell had a certain flare for the dramatics, and Sabrina’s glare burning into the back of his head only fueled his antics. He had one scene in mind, and it was the scene that was certain to kill four birds with one stone- totally make you fall in love with him, he would somehow manage to kiss you (that part was a work in progress), piss off Sabrina, and also- piss off Sabrina.

And kiss you. So maybe five parts. Damn it, Caliban was going to have to make a list.

“Partners?” He whispered softly, gently tugging at your hand as the teacher sat back down. Caliban’s eyes were alight with a tinge of mischief that you either failed to notice or were simply amused by- and your answering nod was more than a little bashful. “We can do my favorite scene.”

“If you say the first kiss scene, I’m punching the daylights out of you.” You warned, playfully nudging his knee with your own. “It will be unkind and I will not feel bad.”

“My lady wounds me.” He dramatically rested his hand above his heart. “And we absolutely have to do this scene-” He raised his hand to silence your half-hearted protests- “because Billy told the guys in calculus that he was specifically going to be pissed if we did this scene.”

Okay, so maybe he’d stretched the truth a little bit. But Caliban knew that the mention of your seedy ex-boyfriend (who you’d enlightened him about during lunch) would absolutely get you to agree to the scene. And it wasn't like he’d lied— Billy Marlin’s glare was nearly as icy as Sabrina’s. And, it wasn't like the way Billy looked at you- with something akin to possession in his eyes- totally made Caliban want to fast track the kid to damnation right then and there. Nope.

“We can meet up later today to practice? I have cheerleading practice after school, but I’m free after that!” You grinned at him, and he felt the tension ease out of his shoulders as you rested your hand on his arm. The gesture was so effortless- but to Caliban, who’d never really experienced connection like this- you reduced him to all but clay again.

“I can drive you home after practice?” Caliban offered, enjoying the yelp that Sabrina let out from the back of the classroom. He shouldered your bag as the bell sounded, noting the way your eyes softened even further at the gesture. “We don't really have cheerleaders down under, you know.”

“You’re welcome to stay and watch.” You shrugged, ignoring the way your heart thudded erratically as he walked you to the locker room. “It won’t be too long today, and Sabrina has a date with Nick after, anyways.”

it was really just too easy.

i can't get your smile out of my mind

i think about your eyes all the time

you're beautiful but you don't even try

(you don't even, don't even try)

modesty is just so hard to find

Caliban wasn’t sure if he regretted his earlier offer. Sure, the sight of you tucked into the tight cheerleading uniform (did they make them that short on purpose?) was pretty much the pinnacle of male fantasy, and the smiles and winks you’d thrown his way whenever he caught your eye during your routines were something else altogether.

But getting the sight out of his brain as you rambled aimlessly in the car about today’s chapters of Dante’s Inferno, while he simultaneously tried to focus on the road and definitely not the way your skirt hitched on the leather seat...

Yeah, Caliban was pretty sure he was in love.

You weren’t too far off, in all honesty. Caliban’s large hands had a firm grip on the steering wheel, and you took the time to admire further up his toned arms as he drove. His hair fell in loose, windswept waves, and his side profile looked like it was sculpted by the freaking gods. Every so often he would glance your way, his perfect lips parting to reveal his perfect teeth and perfect smile and gods-

Yeah, you had the lovebug bad.

“So how did you meet Sabrina?” You questioned innocently enough, and Caliban had to restrain the urge to spill all of the hell-related gossip to you. How Sabrina had managed to keep all of her throne-seeking from you was beyond him, but it certainly added a thrill to his pursuit of you.

“I had some administrative issues the other day and ran into her. She doesn’t like me too much, I’ve gathered.” Caliban was careful not to lie- his entanglement with you had the added perk of pissing off your dearest cousin, but it was genuine on Caliban’s end. He found he didn’t really want to lie about things.

“Sabrina is... touchy.” You offered carefully, shifting in your seat as you pointed out directions to your home. “I don’t really understand why she doesn't like you, to be honest. I was actually going to have a word with her about being nice- you’ve been so sweet, and I was the new kid too a few years back. It's hard to find your place in the established dynamic of a small town.”

Caliban doubted you’d had too much of an issue, with the way the halls seemed to light up around you, but the accompanying smile you gave him was bright enough to soothe his imagined woes. “It’s alright, I reckon she’ll get used to having me around.”

“Used to you?” You mused with a giggle, leaning on the console in a gesture that brought your face much, much closer to his own. He was overwhelmed with your floral scent- something soft and summery and altogether you.

“I plan on being around you a lot, sunshine. If you don’t mind.” He grinned, turning to face you momentarily at the stop sign. Your eyes were wide with hardly concealed surprise at his words, and he watched the realization of the close proximity of his face flicker through them.

It happened so fast that Caliban was almost certain he imagined it- but your eyes had definitely glanced at his lips. The blush that tinged your cheeks as you pulled back confirmed it, and in a moment of calculated risk, Caliban moved to rest his hand on your exposed thigh. 

“No, I wouldn’t mind at all.” 

If Caliban squinted, he could almost picture that he was a normal teenage boy, driving a beautiful, normal girl home from school. The sinking sun was peeking through the windows, bathing you in an ethereal glow, and - at least for right now- everything was perfect.

you were perfect.

now i'm speechless, over the edge

i'm just breathless

i never thought that i'd catch this love bug again

hopeless, head over heels in the moment

i never thought that i'd get hit by this love bug again

Caliban draped himself across your bed, a languid smirk on his lips as you kicked haphazardly placed piles of clothes into your closet.

“I promise I’m not usually this messy,” you apologized with a sheepish smile, shoving a mass of shoes under your bed, “okay, that's a lie. I’m always this messy, I just didn’t expect company.”

Caliban hardly minded. It was adorable how embarrassed you were, and he took the time to take in your bedroom (drawn from his reverie only by the occasional delighted shout when you found a shirt you’d thought had been sacrificed to the laundry gods, or worse, Sabrina’s room).

The first thing Caliban noticed was the books. While your clothes lay in scattered piles, all of your books were meticulously organized and lovingly tucked into shelves that took up an entire wall of the room. Sabrina may have answered that Caliban’s only hobby was torturing babies (or her, which was the same thing, really— and also, what the hell? Caliban may have enjoyed the occasional soul flaying, but only when it was well deserved!)— but Caliban loved to read.

What was one lifetime in one world, when he could learn of a thousand others in just as many universes? Immortality could grow dull, and eternity had to be spent somehow. Caliban tried not to smile as you precariously placed the book that had found its way onto your nightstand back into its place, and supposed that it might be far more enjoyable with someone else.

You seemed satisfied with your damage control, and slumped onto the bed dramatically with a groan. It was then that Caliban’s hand found a stray victim of your clothing massacre.

“Nice.” He grinned, and you peeked up from your playbook to find him dangling a pink lace bra.

Shit.

“Give me that!” You lunged, but Caliban was too fast. He quickly moved them from your reach, laughing wildly as you wrestled him desperately for the bra. 

“You are the worst.” A groan escaped you, and you huffed in fake-defeat as Caliban smirked victoriously at your retreat. You leaped at the chance, tackling Caliban with all your might. While momentarily surprised, he reacted quickly and shifted so that he was now pinning you to the bed, his hair dangling wildly in your face as you both laughed.

Caliban’s face was so close that you could see the flecks of green in his eyes. For a moment, his eyes seemed to flicker to your lips, but in the seconds it took for you to find your voice again, you’d lost your nerve. 

“We should get back to the scene.”

The moment was broken, and Caliban retreated with a bashful look on his face. He ran a hand through his hair and moved to sit across from you, his cheeks tinted a little red as he politely handed you back your intimates and pretended to shield his eyes when you tossed it somewhere. You’d never been so freaking embarrassed in your life, but Caliban was smiling so softly at you, like you were—

“If I profane with my unworthiest hand this holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: my lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.” He motioned around with his hands dramatically, tone playful and light.

You were so dead. Caliban was freaking made for this romantic swooning nonsense that you’d tried to protest nearly the whole ride home, Billy Marlin be damned.

Giggling nervously in what you hoped seemed scene-appropriate, you tried your best to forget being a horny teenager to instead play a horny teenager. “Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this, for saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.”

Caliban’s voice lowered, a smile still tugging at his lips as he took your hands in his own. “Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?”

“Ay, pilgrim.” Your own voice softened in turn as Caliban began to trace mindless patterns on the backs of your hands with his thumbs, “lips that they must use in prayer.”

“O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do. They pray; grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.” Caliban’s eyes were soft, and you imagined that Shakespeare had pictured the man in front of you when putting the words to paper. The words fell so naturally from his lips and he seemed engrossed in the scene— he was, for lack of a better word, enchanting.

“Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.” Your voice was hardly more than a breathless whisper, the proximity of your faces and the intimacy (however imagined) stealing the air from your lungs.

Caliban paused, his eyes meeting yours intently as if searching for something. Whatever it was, he seemed to find it as he took your face in both of his hands.

“Then move not, while my prayer’s effect I take.” 

It was all too much. You could hardly be blamed for kissing him as fiercely as you did.

It was like fireworks, like every cheesy romance novel and play (cough, Romeo and Juliet) claimed it would be. You’d had plenty of kisses before, but never one that melted your brain like this. You forgot all about the scene, about how not real this was supposed to be as your hands tangled in his windswept hair and he pulled you onto his lap.

It was Caliban who first pulled away, only just so that your noses were touching. He was breathing heavily, eyes blown wide— and you felt your whole face turn red as reality consumed you again. “I am so sorry, I’ll just—”

“Where do you think you’re going, Juliet?” Caliban’s hands firmly gripped your hips, preventing you from moving away. His fingers thumbed the band of your skirt, and his next words were a whisper against your lips. 

“Thus from my lips, by thine, my sin is purged.”

kissed her for the first time yesterday

everything i wished that it would be

suddenly i forgot how to speak

hopeless, breathless, baby can't you see?

Caliban was in love. He’d spent the next three weeks with you reciting Romeo and Juliet, sharing shakes at Dr. Cerberus, and tugging you into empty classroom and closets at every opportunity to kiss you senseless.  Every moment not spent with you was at least somewhat occupied by the thought of you, and Caliban found he wasn’t the least bit upset about it.

And Sabrina was pissed.

If she’d hated him before, she positively loathed him now. It was the latest point of contention between yourself and your darling cousin, who’d you taken to threatening with various kitchen utensils and promises to tell the aunties she’d been sneaking out to make her behave. And Caliban, for his part, was perfectly polite— even though he still had every intention of taking the throne from the inexperienced witch who promised to destroy the balance of heaven and hell.

Which presented Caliban’s own latest dilemma. He was going to have to tell you eventually— and in a way that didn't make you totally hate him. He had a plan. Okay, maybe a skeletal plan. Or no plan. Yeah, Caliban was going to wing it. 

After today. He just had to make it through your reenactment of Romeo and Juliet with no demonic catastrophes or maiming Blly, and then he would tell you everything.

But even that was too much to ask.

Sabrina burst through the english classroom doors, yelling in barely concealed panic that there was a BIG problem and the principal needed Caliban now.

Caliban moved to leave with an apologetic smile in your direction, which you were absolutely not having. Despite your current frustration with Sabrina, she looked downright terrified, and you were both concerned for your cousin and overwhelmed with a gut feeling that something was up.

After a few moments, you excused yourself to use the restroom.

You hauled ass to the gym, where the screaming sounded to be coming from. When you entered, you were met with the strangest sight.

The gym was filled with winged... rats? And at the center of the chaos was Sabrina and Caliban, back to back and armed with what appeared to be lacrosse sticks. Caliban’s shirt was tattered from the rats, and you took a fraction of a second to banish the completely innappropriate and untimely thoughts from your head.

“And no one thought to call me?” You shouted angrily through the swarm, snagging a baseball bat from the rack and smacking it around with reckless abandon. Caliban hooted, laughing loudly as you took your place beside them. Rats tore at your clothes, but you were more frustrated that Sabrina had called your boyfriend (or whatever he was) over you.

“Why did you get Caliban! I was right there! Is there something wrong with you? Were you dropped on the head as a child? He’s not even from here Sabrina, he has no idea what-”

“For hell’s sake, he’s not the new kid! He’s not even from Australia! He’s a stupid clay prince from hell who is trying to take my throne and raze humanity, and his stupid plague king sent these after me, and now he’s dating you!” Sabrina spat out the word dating as if it was even more disgusting than the winged vermin tearing at your clothes. 

“Will someone please explain what the hell is going on here?” 

You were no less frustrated when Sabrina revealed her trek to hell and the all ensuing madness she’d partaken in, but you remained calm enough to not turn the bat on her clearly empty skull. 

“And you’re the clay prince of hell... challenging her throne?” You questioned with a sharp glance at Caliban, who nodded reluctantly as he swatted a rat hurtling towards you. 

“Do you even have a driver’s license!” You screamed, waving your baseball bat around wildly.

“I’m a demon prince of hell made out of clay, and you’re worried about if I can legally drive?” Caliban shouted back in astonishment through the wave of shrieking rats. The lacrosse stick he’d snagged was surprisingly effective.

“I was getting to that part, thank you for reminding me!” You hissed, debating whether to smash his face in with the bat. “How about we start with how you completely lied to me, and how our whole relationship or whatever it is a lie! Were you ever going to tell me? Or was this all part of some throne grab?” 

“It wasn’t a lie!” Caliban demanded hotly. “You were not a lie!”

“Really!” You whirled on him, eyes alight with anger. “Because I sure feel like one!”

The rats numbers were dwindling rapidly, and you smacked the last one heading towards you directly at Caliban’s face. It collided with a satisfying shriek, and you threw your bat down as you stormed out of the gym.

Sabrina and Caliban rushed after you, but you’d disappeared in the hall.

now i'm, yeah, oh!

now i'm speechless, over the edge

i'm just breathless

i never thought that i'd catch this love bug again

now i'm hopeless, head over heels in the moment

i never thought that i'd get hit by this love bug again, (oh)

love bug again

You’d remained collected until you’d transported into the middle of the living room, collapsing into auntie Hilda’s arms in a puddle of tears as you told her everything. She’d muttered a stream of ancient curses about Sabrina, but beyond that merely smoothed your hair and told you that all boys were awful— especially demonic princes of hell.

“I hate him.” You glared half-heartedly into your cup of steaming peppermint tea. You couldn’t believe you’d been so stupid. Falling blindly in love with a stranger who had only sought you out for some elaborate game with Sabrina. Screw Caliban and his perfect hair, his perfect smile, his perfect— “I want to bash his face in.”

“No you don't, love.” Hilda smiled knowingly. “You’re angry, yes— and hurt. But you care for the boy. I’ve never seen you so happy as you’ve been these last few days. I think you ought to cool down and hear what he has to say.”

“I never want to talk to him again.” You groaned, burying your face in a pillow. “I’d rather die.”

And because the universe was truly conspiring against you, a knock sounded at the door.

“Well, best get over that quick.” Hilda warned, ignoring your stream of indignant protests as she hustled to the door. 

“Caliban! Yes, do come in love. Oh, yes, we will be having a little chat later, but for now I think it’s my niece you must be speaking to.” Hilda’s cheerful voice trailed in from the foyer, and you jumped up to make a break for it. 

You were halted by a familiar pair of strong arms tugging you back by the waist.

“Get off of me!” You shouted, pushing Caliban away harshly and ignoring the warmth that lingered where he’d touched you. “I want my baseball bat. Somebody get me my baseball bat! I’m going to bash your stupid pretty face in you asshole—”

“Five minutes.” Caliban pleaded desperately, “just give me a five minutes to explain, and then I’ll give you back the baseball bat to bash my face in, okay?”

You considered his offer for a moment, swallowing the sob crawling its way up your throat as you nodded reluctantly. If it made him leave faster, you’d do anything. 

His shoulder sagged in barely concealed relief. “Okay. I am Caliban, Prince of Hell. I am not from Australia, clearly, and am not a transfer student. I am trying to take your cousin’s throne. She does not understand the realm of the damned— she thinks it needs to be generous, rather than a fair judgment of life. I am not her father, and I do not believe in reckless or cruel damnation. I do not wish any harm on Sabrina, and I’ve managed to keep the worst of the plague kings from her. Even if you were to reject me now, I would continue to try to protect her— you have my word.” Caliban paused as you released a breath you did not know you were holding. Your eyes finally dared to meet his, and you nodded for him to continue.

“I agreed to attend Greendale because yes, it did piss off Sabrina, but you were there.” He raised his hand to halt your protest. “You intrigued me, and I wanted to know you better. I will be fully honest that it had the added bonus of irritating your cousin, who I so delight in irritating, but my primary focus was you. You... enchanted me. I had never found myself so invested in anything before as I was in spending mundane days at high school— of all things— with you. Truthfully, it confused even me at first. And while the past you knew is false, I am real— and my feelings for you are true.”

“That is such bullshit, and you know it!” You exploded furiously, smacking his chest with untamed rage. “You knew exactly what you were doing. Who agrees to go to high school because they like a girl? Are you unhinged? Who doesn't just ask someone out if they were so interested, huh? No, you came here with your stupidly perfect little ‘oh I’m Caliban, and I’m so dreamy’ act, knowing full well that it would make me completely abandon all rationality. Well guess what, I did! I fell stupid head over heels for you, and it was all one big lie.”

Your voice broke on the last few words, anger shifting to broken sadness as you continued to pound relentlessly on his chest. “I was a lie.”

He caught your hands, holding them against his chest as he pressed you against the wall. “You weren't a lie, Spellman.” 

His words were breathless whisper, his beautiful eyes pained and desperate as he gripped your hands harder. “I fell for you the moment I saw you. I enrolled in high school because you smiled at me. I learned every line of Romeo and Juliet to recite them to you. When we first met, you wondered how Romeo and Juliet could possibly fall in love after a mere few days, but I understand it now. I have never been driven so completely insane by anything or anyone like this before. The power you have over me is unmatched. I am completely and wholly yours. If you were to ask me right now to leave, to never bother you again, I would leave my heart with you and spend my eternity in endless sorrow. I would think forever of the way you smiled at me, the way you kissed me, how soft your hair felt in my hands, and how my heart raced every time you laughed. I would never forgive myself for the pain I had caused you, and you would haunt me every day, every waking moment, every dream.”

Caliban moved your hands to his lips, nearly kissing them as he pleaded to you with tears in his beautiful eyes. You were motionless, turned to stone by his heavy gaze.

“So please, don’t become my specter. If I am a stranger to you now, let me make you fall for me all over again. I would do it a thousand times, if you'd let me. I could think of no sweeter way to spend my eternity.”

When you’d thought that Shakespeare had been imagining Caliban when he wrote, you’d been wrong. There was no poetry, no book, no lyric that could possibly compare to the way he spoke to you— the way his eyes so desperately tried to convey his anguish.

You removed your hands from his, and his whole face seemed to shatter.

“You’re not a stranger,” you muttered softly, moving to take his face your hands. His face remained guarded, but he leaned instinctively into your touch. “You’re Caliban.”

When you kissed him, it was like falling in love all over again.

And you supposed you did.

“But we are having a long, long talk about everything.” You warned as you pulled back, poking his chest sharply as he nodded profusely. “And if you ever, ever lie to me again, I’ll set something worse than flying rats on you. I’ll let Sabrina have you.”

Caliban laughed wildly, picking you up and spinning you around as he kissed you over and over again in sheer relief and joy. “I love you, Spellman. Anything you want, it’s yours.”

“I just want you, clay boy.”

[amazingphilza]

maniac :: cc!tommy x reader

angst (?) , platonic (?) , gender neutral ! ib: conan gray’s maniac

this is satire & note that i write the reader to be a few months younger than tommy (besides that, i think it is fully inclusive !)

synopsis : you put all your hard work towards a useless crush. with no expectation for reciprocated feelings in the first place, it still all ends in a bittersweet slap to reality.

you grew up with minecraft and it was an understatement to say it was part of your childhood

even years later, you still maintained interested in the game

it wasn’t just a simple video game, the community inspired you to do many things

you aspired to be like the creators you watched at a young age like sky, dantdm, cupquake, stampy, and many more

making people happy and entertained was a dream

and when minecraft slowly began trending again in 2019, you started making your own content whenever you felt like it out of fun

you never got much views but it was an enjoyable experience nonetheless

but it wasn’t until the first minecraft monday you decided to push a bit more with your hobbies and worked hard to make it somewhere

however balancing your passions with school wasn’t the easiest

given, you were still only around 15 and your content wasn’t even that good

with not much of a goal or plan with your youtube channel, you fell out of interest eventually

you loved minecraft but you always a rocky relationship with it; getting back into it for a few months then pretending it never really existed for another few

besides the occasional videos you watched in your pass time, you didn’t stay that updated

then lockdown happened

it changed everything and even got you regressing back to old interests

soon enough you were back to minecraft

there was so much to catch up on

hermitcraft season 7 just started, there was minecraft championships, and smp earth and smp live, and so much more to look forward to watching

you were a bit late on both of the smps but your interest peaked specially towards smp earth and it didn’t stop you from watching the past videos

you first gravitated towards a certain youtuber’s videos first since you remember stumbling onto his videos before from your recommended page; wilbur soot

besides recognizing him from his you laugh you lose series and making parody-type of songs, you didn’t know much

however with a few clicks, you had binge watched his smp earth series effortlessly

you found yourself falling down the endless hole, finding more creators to watch through wilbur

one in particular caught your eye in an interesting way

tommyinnit

my god, how can someone be so annoying and pushy in these videos? like shut up already

and to find out he was barely months older than you frustrated you

you just wanted to be better in some way

if someone like him could be popular, why can’t you? yelling at others and causing problems didn’t seem that hard

and so you went back to working hard on your previously failed youtube channel but this time with a goal; be better than tommyinnit

it was a weird aspiration in your head but it worked

he was your age and successful, why need a better motivator?

tommy wasn’t the sole reason why you strive to make content since you truly did want to create videos to entertain people like the youtubers you originally grew up watching

and with the amount of free time you had, you thoroughly analyzed his content; what was the most popular, how he streamed, edited his videos, everything

you just completely studied the algorithm in general

along the way, tommy’s personality grew on you

tommy was undoubtedly a very loud and energetic person but you became fond of his ambitions

you understood why he was popular at such a young age; he was a natural entertainer

your spite towards the boy turned into a hope

a hope to be at par with him someday and even be mutuals

and it was like your dreams were suddenly manifested into existence

you gained a large following in the early months of lockdown and even was recognized to be apart of minecraft championships

it felt like yesterday that you were just watching your favorite youtubers livestream the same competition

and now you were situation in a team to play yourself for the first time instead of being a viewer for once

not to mention, with tommyinnit as a teammate

how did you manage to get so lucky?

under the excitement, you felt beyond never nervous waiting in the empty discord call for your team to join you to practice the mini-games

in the middle of gathering your thoughts together, you heard a sound from discord signaling someone joined the call

“uh, hello?”

you heard the familiar british accent you spent hours listening to from countless streams and videos

“h-hi! i’m y/n, how are you?”

you hoped tommy couldn’t hear the strain in your voice due to fighting your nerves, but you quietly celebrated that you didn’t freeze up altogether

“oh i’m good, thank you. and i’m tommy by the way, this is the first time we’re speaking, yeah?”

“yep! it’s nice to meet you”

“yeah, i’ve seen your name around the timeline a few times, you seem cool”

oh my god what?

“thanks! um i actually really enjoy your content not gonna lie”

“oh wow, good shit!”

and the conversation smoothly went on, bouncing back and forth between you two before your other two teammates joined the call

once everyone was situated, you decided to start streaming since it was your first mcc and you wanted a vod of you practicing to look at later on as a memory

your chat immediately noticed how much you were enjoying yourself, especially after all the short stories of talking about who inspired you in the past

the smile plastered on your face never left

after stream and your other teammates went offline, it was you and tommy left in the call once together again

“it was nice talking to you tommy! and the practice was really fun, i cant wait for the actual competition!”

“yeah definitely, we’ll for sure place high”

“hopefully. it’s my first time and i hope i don’t cost us the dub”

“nah, you think so? i mean rt and plumbella are also our team mates so you know, it’s all for fun in the end”

you knew tommy was implying the teamwork wasn’t going to be the best compared to the other teams but at least in the end you’ve both made a new friend

“yeah you’re right!”

“anyway it’s getting late imma hop off”

“okay tommy, talk to you soon?”

“yep!”

“alright byee”

“bye!”

the moment he left the call, you felt a sense of relief before a small wave of sadness took over

you wanted to continue talking to tommy but you knew you had other responsibilities to tend to

for the rest of the day, you couldn’t stop thinking of the call and mcc practice

the funny jokes, singing random songs, screaming for no reason, everything

it even kept you awake until the early morning

you buried your head in a pillow and screamed into it after realization hit

y/n no

no no no no no no no

you tried to recall anything that remotely related your other teammates which you remembered that didn’t include tommy

even if it was a few hours ago, you couldn’t pin point something specific

no

i must just be forgetful, right?

what the hell did rt and plumbella even say that whole call?

you vividly remembered everything with tommy and it was clear to you why

surely not

with putting a hand on your chest above your heart, you confirmed that you couldn’t lie to yourself based on the rapid speed

you liked tommy for a good while but it hadn’t clicked to you until now

eventually you fell asleep due to exhaustion but that’s to say you didn’t do so without imagining spending more time with tommy

ever since that day, time went by in a flash

your team didn’t do the best in mcc but it had been a while since then to have that as a concern

sadly you and tommy didn’t talk as often as you hoped but that didn’t make you have less feelings for him

on some days you felt bad since you thought you didn’t know enough about him to even be allowed to crush on him

it was a bit unprofessional but you were nearly 16, it’s normal to have these little crushes right?

eventually time came to rescue when tommy asked you if you wanted to accompany him in the dream smp

undoubtedly, you said yes

and for the few months during summer, it was where you two became even closer than before

however, once both of you two had to go back and attend school, it was harder to catch up with each other

even on calls together off stream, the occasional snapchat notification going off irked you in a way you couldn’t explain

only winter break was the small pause on your disappointment

but even then, it was a slow but steady hill of repressed sadness and frustration until early spring of the following year

you had hoped 2021 would be better than last year but after scrolling through twitter one day and seeing stans making rumors about how tommy had a crush on one of his classmates gave you the same pain you felt when school started last fall

you dreaded to look over at tommy’s most recent story time stream vod where all the gossip arose from; it was him stumbling over his words with the mention of a girl during a certain part

jealousy wasn’t the right word to describe the way you felt

you would never go out of your way to make tommy reciprocate the feelings you had for him

and if he liked someone else the way you saw him, you wouldn’t mind

having a crush is ecstatic, and if he has someone like that too, you should be happy

right?

you tried

what finally broke you was seeing a tiktok a few weeks later of tommy in college with eryn and another girl talking

you didn’t know how she looked like or anything but you wanted to sob

good for him

she didn’t even say much in the video and you dont know enough about tommy’s personal life to jump to conclusions like this

you knew you were acting irrational and you couldn’t be upset at tommy for something he couldn’t control

if anything, you never directly showed interest in him

you didn’t want to in the first place

it was a bad idea from the start

you looked back at the past year and all your intentions

what kind of sick fanfiction did you think you were living?

becoming a content creator, hoping to blow up, just to talk to a big youtuber you had a crush on?

oh my god

y/n what is wrong with you?

listen to yourself, y/n

you need to get some help

whether tommy was dating or even just had interest someone was none of your business

you had to move on no matter what it was and be good and supportive friend

it was dreadful to get over a stupid crush like this but after so much work you put in, you gave some sympathy for yourself

in a friend perspective, you were happy with whatever tommy did and was satisfied your friendship together, but you hadn’t realized how much you gambled from the beginning

and just for a crush?

you couldn’t comprehend how far you gone because you fancied someone

it wasn’t like anyone could get famous and become a popular content creator either

and now with you being on the dream smp along with a successful youtube channel at 16? you were grateful something pushed you enough to work this hard

but you’d never forget the fact everything that lead up to this point was a crush on no other than tommyinnit which first spurred from complete spite

“who’s the one better off now?” your thoughts mocked you from the complete irony

sigh

y/n, you maniac

[unproduciblesmackdown]

to complain abt something else (mostly), weird time immediately bailing on this podcast discussion b/w two people who'd seen west end bmc and who'd also prior discussed further history / context including the egregious layers of snubbing / disrespect from the tonys, and both noting how the perspective that if something's for a younger audience it's inherently inferior is unfair & inaccurate & detrimental, further pointing out the "and then next tonys refused to nominate tlt at all, despite being the one show w/an original soundtrack for one, And a speech abt bringing younger audiences to the Theatre" and all of the stance like yes think this musical didn't get its critical due from institutions b/c of such bullshit lenses like well not arguing there, sounds good to me, time to discuss the show huh

anyways they don't get halfway through "more than survive" before i bail b/c i'm already a bit wary but then when they mention jeremy encountering his dad who they note is clearly depressed, it becomes a matter of their asserting jeremy can't see that anyone else has problems like him, and they eventually go on to say & agree with each other that in fact a premise here is that jeremy doesn't have "real problems" and i'm like well that's enough for me lmfao i don't need basically the nyt brantley take except from a "but i like the show" angle thanks lol

and i'd Just talked about (while discussing deh, specifically stemming from my having also just given up on the same podcasts' discussion of it, i'm pretty sure lol) how it's always Something that like, even if you think that the only thing jeremy wants here is to Get Laid (vs that he likes one girl in particular & would like her to like him back) & Get Popular (vs that he has only one friend & is bullied) i hardly agree that it's just the stuff of frivolous teen angst vs. that once you've paid one bill ever you now can have Serious Problems. like yeah no shit people's perspectives change & maybe like ohh as always asserted Prom doesn't matter to someone a few years later as much as it seemed to at the time, but a) when in life is Anything guaranteed to seem as important After The Fact and why does the hypothetical perspective of their future self mean their feelings/perspective truly don't matter now and b) shit like Sex and Popularity and the bullying social approach people bring all the time that's perfectly in line w/high school shit Does get to be regarded as now serious and deep if it's adults worrying about all of it, like, oh yeah this keen analysis of power dynamics and the social forces that influence and entangle our existences like. yeah an adult perspective is hopefully gonna be more complicated / have more experiences & insights to draw on than a teen's, what with as pointed out that teenagers are just encountering a lot of shit for the first time and don't really know what to do / how to do it, vs adults having more tools to deal with the same things, doesn't mean they're necessarily dealing with Fundamentally Completely Different Experiences

so that's to say how like. yes you can note Sync Up / Pitiful Children and how we get this point of how jeremy doesn't realize that even the peers who seem to have it made are struggling / unhappy, and i'm sure it's relevant that yeah theoretically a high schooler may be (reasonably) caught up dealing with their own shit and not have formed these relationships / ft. this communication that lets them fully realize how they can relate to other people and vice versa, i.e. realize they're not so isolated with this, vs expressing it like "ah smh so a teen thinks they're the only one with problems huh" like idk maybe there's some of that but like back off lmfao. How would people know, obviously. But Anyways to actually bring it around: that if you look at the most pertinent material with jeremy and his dad specifically, it's the pants song, a scene wherein actually it's made clear that the issue isn't that jeremy thinks his dad's just being Difficult On Purpose and he hasn't realized his dad could have problems and be sad too, it's that the problem is he Has been relating to his dad and seeing that as a potential future version of him (as like. directly stated, though idk about west end changes, i presume it's still in the two player game scene) and resenting that he's very aware his dad is still like this sad lonely person and he could still be that Indefinitely too. it's extremely relevant that jeremy does in fact realize his dad is struggling & miserable Too lol but nah classic teen, jeremy thinks his dad has no feelings XD

(also that of course one way or another i think it makes sense that jeremy could be frustrated that he's just getting less Parenting from a depressed single parent and he doesn't need to like, justify these feelings further by being sympathetic enough, like well jeremy you can only be impatient with your dad Not driving you to school like he said he would if you tried giving him a pep talk that assured him you Know what he's going through like....sure yeah it's also relevant to that broader matter of like, recognizing more of yourself in other people / understanding others more or whatever, to also realize like ah even my parents are People who are fallible / imperfect / struggling but you know. he doesn't need to interact with his dad as a peer even if yes ideally his dad could get some support too & it'd go smoother if jeremy had more Outright expressed sympathy like, well, he doesn't really, and we don't quite see jeremy's dad Getting It re jeremy either and offering the exact moral support he needs, and think most people agree that a child need not offer their parent equal emotional support, especially when not even yet an adult themself)

and that furthermore it's like. boil it down and this is his dad dealing with Girl Problems & Feeling Bad / Loneliness too lmfao like again just that the same issues are recognized as Significant when it's an adult and frivolous when it's teens like yeah sure of course jeremy not being on the radar of this girl he likes isn't the same as getting divorced & being a single parent but yknow, it's still ~Relationships~ at its core, dismissed as Not A Real Problem for jeremy and presumably immediately understood as Significant for his dad, like, they're both depressed af then but no, if jeremy has a reaction of showing frustration about anything, he has too much energy And obviously can't sympathize & that all means He Cannot Be Depressed Too (obviously Not, and funny whenever it's you know, supposed to be this magical depression empathy when you pick out the character you think is Definitely depressed, and where if any other character were also dealing with the same thing, they'd immediately recognize the other person's depression and do everything they could in that moment to fix it (in a way that better be expressed as unfiltered earnest sympathy, or else) like ah right those damn teens who can't fathom of it or see when anyone else is sad. whilest i, wisely, as an adult, recognize jeremy has no Real Problems, since if his dad's depressed, that's real shit, if jeremy is, it isn't

and naturally yknow no mention before the "he has no real problems" that jeremy's dad being freshly divorced is jeremy's experience of having his mom recently out of his life wherein he's hardly heard from her but immediately makes this about how his dad should Also be able to move on (and/or have already Been that more winning person who his mom could still live this dream life with) and so jeremy's trying to do while also trying in other ways to not be his dad, i.e. avoid whatever mistakes he made to end up here in the first place, i.e. jeremy talking about all this while he's about to seriously double down to michael like look i think i might need this squip / i at least need to try to see if it's Really an option. not a real problem though X'D

also funny that you know, deh is different and not just comparing it as Thee Teen Problems Musicals as others might assert but for sure there's like, a similar enough vague premise for the Very start, (and also Hilarious how the [mental health] aspect of deh was like, basically an afterthought used to further emphasize / illustrate like "ah you see, these are the ways evan can see himself in connor" but got that focus for like ah yep that's a real problem, this is about mental health for sure, vs bmc that actually Is deliberately about it, but nah, it's a farcical romp abt getting a gf & wanting to be the coolest & stuff) but there was a point before giving up on the deh episode where one host specified that like no, evan is lonely & sad & has one friend, but he's Not bullied, vs that here of course you've got the Genre of Scifi and more of a comedic approach overall but jeremy is very much in fact, bullied, but again. No Real Problems, kids will be kids, nobody was ever negatively & lastingly affected by just a lil antics in high school or earlier (nbd being miserable since middle school began, like nigh half his life if you start at age four when often some schooling begins / doubt he Could feel inconsequential before that age. get a real problem buddy)

anyways just to wrap it up it's also like, you know, i'm gonna go ahead and say you can have Real Problems at any age, even if it's not like "oh first of all if it's not what i think of as having enough Financial Insecurity? it can't be a real problem" (although of course that in itself is a real problem) or you know, cue anything else, what is recognized from the outside by any randos as abuse (high school bullying wouldn't be tho, don't worry about it) (and people are just so good at conceiving of how abuse would or wouldn't manifest & then deciding when it's Really Bad enough too, and never operating on the premise that the other person Can't deserve it actually) what is like a serious adult who can be like "oh i recognize this teen is clinically depressed, so that means you can take their angst seriously actually" much less also whether or not even someone being suicidal must a) be textually stated vs a possible inference someone can make or b) only be taken seriously if an adult goes "ah yep that's serious" or they die or whatnot. which reminds me that also the hosts did point out the stakes Aren't Life Or Death like yes that too is all that matters, it's only real & serious & an issue if someone is definitely gonna die in the course of the plot & we Know this beforehand

anyways tl;dr just funny to talk about Not being dismissive abt material about and enjoyed by teens & then interpret bmc Thusly like well then. same podcast where i gave up on the deh analysis that went "jared being gay in the movie is the weirdest choice b/c that IS the homophobic character" like okay i'm just walking out, i could leave

[duskamethyst]

at last.

a/n: in celebration of reaching 200 followers. thank you. i’ve started this piece months ago but constantly failed to find the will to continue whenever i opened the draft. however, the response i’ve received from my other works gave me the drive and i knew i had to finish this.

word count: 4.1k

genre: smut, nsfw, fluff

pairing: musician!semi x f!reader

warnings: mirror sex, soft dom

summary: you and semi are in a band together. though having feelings for the male, you’ve always kept it professional until one night...

“thank you for tonight! you guys were amazing!” you speak through the mic enthusiastically, waving to the crowd as they cheered on and begging for an encore at the same time. “we hope to see your faces again when we come out with new songs soon! please continue to support us! we love you!” your lips curl into a huge smile, stepping off to the back of the stage while waving your fans goodbye before the staff hands you a towel to wipe off your sweat and a mineral bottle to cool off.

it’s another amazing night in a different city for you and the band. the feeling of having people enjoying your music and your voice is overwhelming and to have such wonderful bandmates to join you in this journey for three years now has you feeling beyond blessed.

the band started small, having the drummer and bassist as your high school besties while the guitarist, semi eita was later picked up along the way when one day you blasted on your socials and the small music stores stating the band needed a new guitar player. your band was pretty well-known in the town you live in, showing up and performing at a few gigs and now you’re much more familiar in the industry and often play in different cities. 

semi was one of the few candidates that was chosen to be part of the band. much to everyone’s surprise, playing the guitar wasn’t his only talent. semi was able to write lyrics, produce and sing and that’s what made him stand out among the others. while making the decision with your band mates, you guys knew not to pass up on him and today it proved to be the right decision you guys had made. 

to describe semi eita, he’s incredible. a genius and a sight for sore eyes. hell, he could even pass to be a model if he was into it. you knew that his addition to the band could garner more fans through his skills and looks. on his first night at the gig as the guitarist, you noticed how some of the girls there were ogling him and especially recording him through their phones, even the older woman who was practically forced to be there almost every night by her husband paid more attention (and you believed it was because of semi’s presence) as your band performed. maybe the fangirls could start off by drooling over his looks before they could slowly support the band entirely, hence building a bigger fanbase. 

you feel a little bad for him. you believe that semi is more than just his looks but you can’t really blame people for liking pretty things– it’s only natural. semi has a burning passion for music and what he does and he works tirelessly for the band. he gives his all when he writes lyrics and he uses most of his time by himself inside the studio, learning and enhancing his skills further. you often accompany him in the studio, offering your opinions when he shares the new lyrics he came up with and the studio would be filled with harmonizing voices of yours and his. 

a weird fuzzy feeling engulfs you when you learn that semi had always especially asked for you to join him in the studio and never the other guys, but you alway shrug it off; reminding yourself that it’s only because of work and nothing else.

though no matter how much you try to deny your feelings, you know you’re already head over heels for semi eita.

you sigh and put down your luggage as soon as you walk into your hotel room before looking out at the window to see the fans that were swarming as you arrived earlier begins to dissipate slowly. as you’re smiling and being lost in your thoughts, you start to hear strumming sounds from the other side of the room– undoubtedly semi’s. 

it’s way past midnight and you’re all tired from the tour and the recent performance. while all you can think about is getting inside the tub and having a good night sleep, semi on the other hand can only think about the next show and creating new music. though he’s much more new to the industry compared to you, he works so diligently and it makes you feel a bit guilty and shameful. so you decide to come up to his room and see if he needs anything– or maybe just to persuade him to stop thinking about work and go to sleep. 

“eita, it’s me.” you say as you knock on his door. you hear the strums come to a halt before he opens the door for you. “gosh, you look terrible.” 

it’s only partly true. his hair is disheveled and he only has his jeans on from earlier but you try so hard not to check him out and quickly walk inside his room. semi closes the door as he turns to you, “you’re not asleep yet?” 

“no, i heard you were playing and that’s why i’m here. you know you should be sleeping instead, right?” you sit on the couch where he was sitting earlier. sheets of paper are spread on the coffee table and you pick up the one with the lyrics that he wrote. 

“sorry,” he apologizes as he sits next to you and notices the one that you’re reading. “but it’s good that you’re here too.” 

ignoring the little skip your heart made, you refuse to look at him and read one of the lines out loud in an attempt to play cool.

“i’m alone,

“i just wrote that one in the van earlier.” he scratches the back of his neck as he laughs nervously. his eyes never tearing from you, just watching while you scrutinize through his little work.

i’ve nowhere to go,

but you gently held my hand.”

you smile as you finish reading the last line of his incomplete lyrics and turn to look at him, “i wonder what it sounds like?”

“ah, i haven’t figured it out much but i think it could go like this.” he grabs the guitar from where he left earlier and places it in front of his chest before slowly strumming a few chords. you watch as his fingers sweep up and down across the strings, his black nails that you painted weeks ago are only left with little residues. 

it sounds exactly like you heard in your room earlier. his voice and the tunes he’s making fills the room and it sounds absolutely beautiful. you can sense the longingness in his work this time around, a little different from what he used to play but a little change doesn’t really mean bad– it feels like something that many people can relate to.

you gleefully clap your hands as he stops playing and a faint blush creeps up to his cheeks which he hopes you don’t notice. 

“what’s your inspiration this time?” you ask as he puts back down the instrument.

“well…” semi sighs and leans further into the couch. “someone special to me– the reason i started pursuing this.” 

a heavy lump suddenly forms in your throat, making your stomach churn at the thought of semi having someone special in mind but you quickly shake off the feeling. you’ve always been close with the male, he was easy to get along with from the start and semi would agree that out of all the members, he spent the most time with you; though it's only because it’s strictly on a work basis and you respect that, and you remain professional.

“must be. you’ve never written anything so personal but tell me all about it! you know i won’t judge.” you force a smile, hoping that it’s not too obvious and instead semi laughs at your eagerness to know about his little puppy love. 

“it’s not even that great. i feel like it’s rather ironic– the reason i pursue this is also the reason we can’t be together.” he looks at you as he speaks, as if searching for something.

“damn, that sucks so bad.” you lean back to the couch with him and gaze at the ceiling while imagining the type of person semi would like and start to mindlessly compare yourself to them– putting you down even further.

“you get it, right? on top of that, i think we would lose some fans if we start to date.” he continues as he rests his arm behind your head in a more relaxing manner. he hopes that he emphasized the word clearly so he could get a reaction from you.

however, you only laugh a bit at his consideration. you can already imagine the online articles being bombarded about semi being in a relationship, not forgetting the snarky remarks and lashes he and his partner might get on stan twitter and the thought makes you shudder.

“but i would want to see you happy... even if it’s not with me.” you mumble lowly before realizing what you just blurt out on the last part. “i mean- i mean- i was thinking from a fan’s point of view, of course!”

the sight of you being bashful and constantly avoiding to make eye contact with him is endearing to him. he can’t help but to laugh and it provokes him to tease you instead. his hand creeps up to pull and tuck away the strands of hair behind your ear, instantly drawing your attention to the male next to you. you’re waiting for him to speak but he only stares quietly at you with a gentle smile across his face. 

“what?” you’re surprised at how meek you sound and you know he notices it when his smile turns into an amused shit-eating grin. 

“really? you’d be happy for me?” he asks, leaning his head down on the arm he has hanging on the couch back. 

“um, yeah? since you’re my–”

“friend?” he cuts you off in an instant. “i’d be happier to at least know that you’d feel jealous, though.” 

jealous? you blink and nervously laugh at the poor joke, “why would i be– you’re funny. anyways, go to sleep!” 

semi’s lips tug into a frown as you stand up from the couch and when you’re about to take a step away, semi grabs your wrist and pulls you back to him. he wraps his arms securely around you and buries his face at the nape of your neck, inhaling the very faint scent from your expensive perfume you had on before the show. 

“you’re so close, yet so far.” his hot breath fans against your skin as he murmurs with a hint of frustration lacing his voice. 

thinking not too deeply into it, you disregard the butterflies in your stomach, “yeah, i think you can put that in the song.” you attempt to reply coyly, concealing any suggestions of you being a total nerve-wreck right now. 

“god dammit.” semi curses. he turns your face to look at his, “this isn’t about work anymore.”

“what–” he presses his lips on yours and his arms pull you closer to him which your body wastes no time but to completely melt into.

semi pulls away to take a breath, locking his brown eyes with yours as he speaks. “stop making me feel so lonely.”

“i’m… sorry…?” your apology comes out unsurely, not knowing where this conversation is leading up to and it’s making you feel apprehensive more than anything. there’s no way he’s confessing, right?

semi sighs as he runs his fingers through your hair, “i used to only play the guitar as a hobby but you’re the reason why i even thought about getting into this band.” 

you’re out of words to speak from the abruptness and remain quiet before he continues, “i thought i’d be happy enough just being close to you but i realized i wanted more than that. am i being selfish?”

you break free from his grasps and turn to the blushing male before curling into his chest. semi’s body is still as he processes what’s happening and slowly relaxes as he wraps his arms around you again.

“no, eita, no. you’re not.” you reassure. “i really had no idea.” 

“then, can i kiss you again?” 

“whatever you want, eita.” you mutter under your breath before he gently cups your chin with his fingers and pulls you into a deep kiss. 

for the second time that night, you feel as if you’re on cloud nine as your wet tongues twirl against each other in your mouths. a faint taste of tobacco and beer still lingers on his tongue but you pay no mind to it when you’re too busy drowning into your own ecstasy. 

semi manages to push you down on your back without breaking the kiss and props on his knees before his hands wander all around your body. a gasp passes your lips when he squeezes your breasts against your shirt and his lips move down to nip on your neck. 

“e-eita...” you breathe and the male pulls away to look at you with heavy lidded eyes– and they’re filled with desire. 

“whatever i want, right?” he whispers and you nod your head before he delves back down to litter bruises on your skin. “and what i want is you.” 

warmth surfaces on your cheeks as you hum in response, a subtle reply to tell him that the feeling is mutual. as soon as semi lifts up your shirt, he quickly tips down to tug your bra and latches his mouth on your hardened nipple while his fingers tweak the other. the stimulation causes your body to jolt in pleasure and you can practically feel yourself drenching in your panties.

semi glances up at you expectantly when he notices your thighs are pressed together underneath him. with his other free hand, he lifts up your denim skirt and rubs circles on your clit against the damped fabric. 

you mewl and tug his hair gently as your hips desperately grind against his finger for relief. 

“does it feel good?” he speaks softly. “you’re so wet for me.”

“y-yeah.” you mumble a little bit in embarrassment after he pointed it out but semi finds it to be endearing as he lets out a breathy chuckle. 

“i’ll make you feel even better,” he grins, bending your knees up and spreading them apart. “but i need to hear it.”

you nibble your lip anxiously, “please?”

“please what?” he coos, though he’s already settling his head down between your thighs while he looks at you with passion filled eyes.

your lips feign a pout but your pussy twitches when you feel his finger pulls your panties to the side, “please make me feel better.”

“good enough.” he smirks before spreading your puffy folds and sticks out his tongue to lap off your essence. 

a loud moan rips from your throat as he sucks on your clit and purposely teases it with quick flicks with the tip of his tongue. your legs start to tremble and try to close together but to no avail since semi holds them apart from crushing his head. 

there were nights where he could only touch himself while imagining how you would sound like writhing underneath him but tonight, you made his dreams turn into reality. your moans and whines are like music to his ears and they’re better (and he knows it would be) than what he expected. now semi is driven even more to hear what more beautiful sounds you can produce for him.

semi groans when he slips one finger inside your tight hole and you cry in surprise as you feel his finger brushing in and out through your walls. he can feel that the walls are already sucking him greedily while your hips jerk to fuck yourself with his finger.

“god, you’re so fucking hot.” he grunts, inserting another finger and fucks you ruthlessly. you can feel your orgasm building and threatening to tip over when his finger curls, hitting your g with every drag. 

“fuck, eita–” you pant as your toes curl over the unbearable stimulation and causes your body to shake. 

“feels great, hm? i want you to cum all over my fingers.” he toys with the swollen bud before harshly sucking it.

“mmhh– gonna cum!” your eyes screw shut as your orgasm finally crashes down and your pussy gushes and flutters around his fingers.

your breathing turns erratic and a whine escapes your lips from the emptiness when semi pulls out to lick his fingers.

“you taste so fucking good.” he groans, hovering above you and crashes his lips onto yours so you can taste your own juices from his tongue before he pulls away breathlessly.

“i want to make you feel good too, eita.” you whisper almost innocently and push him back so he can sit down on the couch. semi watches you as you kneel beside him to unbuckle his belt and proceed to unbutton and unzip his jeans swiftly before he helps you release his throbbing dick from its confinements. 

you nearly gawk at the size of his cock; thick and veiny, tip flushing red with a bead of precum. you give a few strokes with your hand and a sharp hiss rolls off his tongue as soon as he feels your tongue swirling around the slit and slowly taking a fair amount inside your mouth. 

“fuuuuck.” he sighs as he sinks into his seat further, eyes closed shut as he lets you take over. you offer the pressure needed by pressing the bottom of the length with your hand and hollowing your cheeks while your tongue runs up and down the rest of his cock, slobbering it with your saliva. 

“oh, fuck– baby. that feels so fucking good.” tears prickle from the corner of your eyes when you force yourself to take deeper into your mouth and his hips jerk when the tip hits the back of your throat. semi’s hand finds itself on top of your head; he makes sure not to tug your hair too hard as he guides you bottom to top and a pop sound is audible when he pulls you away just before he feels like he’s about to cum. 

he wipes the tears from your eyes and kisses you while pulling his jeans and boxers all the way down before continuing to carry you off from the couch with him and leads you to his bed. 

“can i?” he looks at you concerningly and you nod your head yes.

“take it all off.” he commands once he puts you down on the bed. what seemed to be the gentle semi is long gone but his dominating side makes you undeniably excited so you easily oblige, peeling off your clothes until you’re bare and naked in front of him.

“on your knees.” he orders again and you submissively get on your knees but he stops you before you can lean down on the bed. “face the mirror.”

you turn your head to see the large mirror in front of the bed and shift again as he climbs on the bed and props behind you. 

“i want us both to see how pretty you look when i’m balls deep inside you.” he grins.

a soft mewl rolls off your tongue when semi smears your juices through your slits with his cock. he grabs your hips for leverage as he slowly penetrates into your hole and you bite your lip hard when you can feel his girth stretches you out both painfully and deliciously. semi gives you a moment to adjust and after receiving the green light does he begin to move his hips. 

“i’ve waited so long for this.” he growls, black nails digging deeper into your skin that'll be able to leave crescent marks by the end of the session as he pounds his cock into your cunt erratically. 

your cheek is pressed down and your hands clutch the bed sheet as you feel his veins brushing against your walls and his tip kissing your cervix with each thrust. semi’s breathing is already ragged from above you, hips diligently rolling into you as he picks up the pace. 

“look at you, baby– fuck– i’m so lucky.” you moan at the praise, subconsciously feeding to your ego; to be desired by semi and to have semi fucking you into oblivion. 

“s-so good.” you whine, glancing up to the mirror to see yourself but what you’re mostly able to see is the man behind you. his toned abs, ash blonde bangs almost covering his eyes and brows furrowed in focus as he ruts into you mercilessly like a feral beast and it’s fueling your arousal even further.

a mischievous smile etches on his lips as his hazy eyes light up once they meet yours through the reflection, “i don’t think you can see yourself that well.”

you feel your body being lifted up abruptly before he makes you stand on your knees with your back against his broad chest. in front of you, you can clearly see the mess he has made out of you; hair unkempt, pussy slopping and dripping down his balls and the sheets from where your bodies are connected. 

“better.” he smirks through the mirror. both of your eyes fixed on the reflected image ahead; your tits bouncing up and down as he continues to thrust into you while his arm wraps around your torso to hold you in place. 

“so– pretty. my baby– my muse.” he says in between grunts and takes one hand to cup your face. “can you see my cock go in and out of you?” semi intends to show you how lewd it looks by pulling out his thick cock slowly and pushing back inside your pussy in an agonizing pace. 

“yes, fuck– eita.” you sob, staring at the mirror ahead as you see his cock glistens with slick when he pulls out from your stretched cunt and fills you back in, edging you at the same time. 

“and what happens when i touch you here?” he coos, reaching down to press your clit with his thumb. a shock of pleasure washes through your body, making your eyes roll back and your head thrown back to his shoulder. “come on, you can tell me.”

“it’s-it’s gonna make m-me cum.” you whimper as your hips roll desperately against his finger and each time he plunges into you. 

“and you’re gonna sing my name when you do, right?” 

“yesyesyes– please, just–” semi cuts you off by continuing his pace again and the knot in your stomach tightens at the feeling of being stuffed full when he rams deep inside you along with his ministrations on your throbbing bud.

his other hand pinches your pebbled nipple and causes you to keen in pleasure and you finally open your eyes to look at the mirror again to see the compromising position you’re in and the way he manhandles you; having absolute control all over your squirming body with both his hands and his cock– and it got your vision turning white as you tip over the edge. 

“eita!” your lips part into a scream as your pussy flutters around his cock and come undone. the walls squeezing him elicits a low growl from his throat and he holds your body with both his arms as he remains to fuck you in order to chase after his own high.

“fuck– that’s it.” he kisses your head when you let out a choke from the overstimulation. “i’m gonna fill this pretty pussy.” sporadic thrusts begin to stutter as his balls tighten and his cock twitches inside you to indicate that he’s close to reaching his orgasm and a loud moan rips from his throat as he finally comes undone. 

semi stills for a few moments inside you, catching his breath and regaining composure before he lifts your body slightly to pull out his softening cock. your trembling knees fail to keep you up so your body falls down on the mattress and semi chuckles at the sight as he joins next to you. 

“you did so good for me, love.” his sharp, brown eyes gazes adoringly into yours and a soft smile tugs the corner of his lips as he caresses your hair. “was i too rough?”

“just a little,” you blush. “but i liked it.”

semi sighs in relief and draws closer to give a chaste kiss on your forehead, “i’ll run a warm bath for you, alright? then we can go to sleep.”

you nod your head, feeling warm and fuzzy when he holds you in his strong arms before he leaves for the bathroom. as you wait and hear water filling the tub, your mind wanders how you’re going to break the news to your manager about your blossoming relationship with semi. 

and semi thinks about the same thing too. 

whatever it is, it doesn’t matter to him. 

as long as he has you.

duskamethyst © 2020 • do not modify, translate or repost anywhere.

[ablizmal]

hello!! this is my selfship introductory post!!!

(i’m posting two versions of this post— one with all these lovely little gifs, and one without, as i know some people can be sensitive to them <33)

my dearly beloved selfship is lawliz 🥰 (or lawlizzie if i want it to sound even cuter lol).

it’s of. uhhhhhh. me and the sweets loving detective from death note/// 👉👈

(no this isn’t suggestive, it’s just y2k in-universe and i LOVE y2k clothing lol)

some basics on the selfship!!!

we appear to be solar opposites in a bunch of different ways!

he’s calm and collected, always keeping things to himself unless he wants to ruin someone’s entire life and be painfully blunt about something HAKDJAHDSJS. whereas i seemingly am open, emotional, and spirited!!

my alias is “juliette rae ambers” (YES i created a full ass pseudo name dhsjdkajdjajajs). but to distinguish me irl and in-selfship-universe me, i’ll refer to my self insert as “juliette” whenever i talk about them.

L first met juliette through a past case, as they did some SHADY looking shit lmao. she’s just that eccentric and erratic <333

SO after spending some time with her, he eventually realizes they’re not apart of the case. like at ALL. but L basically goes “okay. wait, what the fuck’s wrong with her actually?” and continues to spend time with them because of that HAHAJDJSJSKSJS (again— juliette is eccentric and unpredictable.)

watari brings up how excited and affectionate juliette gets whenever he catches a glimpse of them together. L doesn’t get why watari is bringing this up. watari suggests that perhaps, juliette has a crush on L.

yeah, so L’s brain crashes DHSKDJSKDJAJHSAKS

he didn’t even think of that as a POSSIBILITY because he views himself as undesirable, ugly, creepy, etc (🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

so L brings this up with juliette. she denies it terribly (because they’re such a mess when they’re flustered), but after relenting, L reveals that he brought it up because he’s interesting in learning more about it. he has trouble identifying his own emotions and hasn’t been in love before, so he asks me to be apart of a study. it’s just information, essentially, letters detailing specific sensations and lovey dovey thoughts i get of him.

i agree to it because i LOVE psychology and have always wanted to be apart of a psychological study!

but at this point, L isn’t in love with me. he slowly falls over time, much to his mental debates on if it’s “ethical” or not. (he’s overthinking it!!! ALSO, WOW, L thinking about morals when it comes to someone?? they must be a ~special someone~ to him 🤭)

the stoic character who keeps to himself is (mutually) in love with the visually expressive, musically inclined jester!!! (does this make sense 😭)

juliette is with L throughout the entire kira case. the first time the taskforce meets L, she’s just standing to his right side (it’s a whole thing) in a lolita getup, so they assume, like watari, that juliette is a maid to L of sorts. but NO, juliette just fucking LOVES fashion lmaooooooo

ANYWAYS, what i’m trying to get to is that juliette loves music. it connects to them on such a deep level, and they love to sing and entertain. so sometimes, as a break/interlude in the kira case, she sings and plays songs. (they’re oddly captivating… just like a performer at an event.)

L can’t have the taskforce knowing him and juliette’s interpersonal relationship, so he and juliette have silently agreed to refer to each other as “associates” whenever the question comes up.

juliette talks out loud a lot as a habit. but, again, she likes to be entertaining first and foremost, so she only says things she thinks will be the most intriguing. she can keep to herself just fine. but L knows. he knows how intentional everything they do is. he can relate, and is intrigued about this part of them. and without fail, he listens, catalogues, and responds to everything she says U///U because he caaaaares 🥹🥹🥹 (much to light’s annoyance during the case lol)

once misa starts to reside in the taskforce headquarters, you fucking KNOW she and juliette would become ✨fashion besties✨ヽ(>∀<☆)ノ 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

juliette is very silly, laidback, loose, witty, thoughtful, and compassionate. will and has been promptly serious when the time calls for it.

juliette has forced L to watch rocky horror with them so. many. times. it’s now their couple movie of sorts aha <3

juliette cannot STAND light. he’s such an arrogant bitch baby, so she insults and burns him constantly (which L… enjoys 👀 JFKSJFKSJDKSJS, HE LOVES THE FACT THAT I CAN DEFEND MYSELF AND THAT I’M NOT A DOORMAT)

it’s so interesting to listen to these two talk. cause like, L is formal, a bit oddly polite in his wording, and naturally uses long words here and there. juliette, on the other hand, is very casual in speech. she casually swears, she refers to others with “dude,” “bro,” and “man,” and uses some slang words here and there. the taskforce members gawk at the sheer contrast sometimes.

so juliette’s mainly goth, right?? misa introduces her to the fashion, and she fucking loves it. her usual goth color combo is hot pink and black!!

…buuuuuut, juliette likes fashion in general, so sometimes she wear “pretty in pink” ass y2k outfits, then at other times glam rock-y, then gritty type of clothing, then elegant, they girly, then—

L loves to see whatever outfit they come up with (he for sure spoils the FUCK out of her hahajdjsjsja awwwwwwwww 😊 <333)

THEY’RE LITERALLY THE “plain boyfriend + alt girlfriend” COUPLE DHSKDHKADJKASJKASJAJA

i could go on and on, but this is an INTRODUCTORY post, soo……….. these are the basics of their dynamic!! i will post art, fics, and just ramble posts in general talking about it!!! :]

you can find more content in my “accidental emo boy meets intentional goth girl(gender neutral)” tag on here, OR on my new, selfship only account @lawliz-indulgence !

i love this little selfshipping community, xxx (✿ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)

[beelspillowpet]

A Lesson in Love - A “Character Analysis” on Asmodeus

I had to come for the tracks, wigs, and weaves of bitches when Pomade dropped because I saw people talking shit about my boy. This was a milestone “project” or “reward” I guess?

I hit 400 followers today while I was out running errands!!! Thank you guys SO SO MUCH for the love and support! I can’t WAIT to produce more content for everyone!!!

Below the cut there WILL BE talk of season 3, as well as some talk of chapter 16. There’s a healthy amount of theorizing on his personality as well, I hope you don’t mind! This came out more like a plea to get people to change their minds about how Asmo really is, rather than a comprehensive essay of sorts. So here we go!

There’s something we apparently still need to talk about in this fanbase. The unrealistic idea of Asmodeus being a sex freak, and an unreliable person in general despite there being little proof of it. We need to set a few things straight about Asmo moving forward.

December 25th rolled around and Asmo’s audio drama and song were released. I take it everyone enjoyed both parts, as well as I did. My timeline both on twitter and tumblr were filled with Asmodeus content, as well as the other brothers and such. But I mostly got Asmo content. However, in peeks and cracks, if I looked hard enough, I still saw people who absolutely loathed Asmo or who were indifferent to him. Keep in mind; I think it’s okay. You don’t have to like everyone.

I’ve only joined the fanbase in September, but even I could tell some of these takes were old fashioned. I downloaded the game on October 17th, a very important anniversary for me, while I 

was still in bed in the morning. I blazed through the entire story of season 1 and now I am stuck in season 2, specifically in Chapter 24. I obviously don’t have every card of Asmodeus with his Devilgrams, but I have been analyzing his character over the past few days for this.

So needless to say, I have a considerable amount of information on him, as well as personal thoughts that may help some learn to love him. Or at the very least, from spreading a negative idea of him around as if it were true. Enough that should help clear his name, so to speak.

Let’s look at his title; Avatar of Lust. Now naturally the thoughts that come to your head are sex and other sexual bits. So I can understand how some people would come to the conclusion that he’s just a sex freak. But if you look under the surface of his title, like I’m sure you’ve had to for your own personal favorites (*cough* Lucifer, Belphie, and Satan ESPECIALLY) you would discover that Asmodeus is more than just about sex. In fact, sex takes up very little of his pass time, if you were to believe it!

In recent chapters, as I’ve been told, Asmodeus doesn’t really get around much anyways:

Granted, this was said while in Celestia, but I imagine not much has changed for him since his fall, as well as his brothers.

Not really comfortable being with just anyone, huh…? Sounds like someone who doesn’t have sex so warily often as you’d think!

Being lustful can come in many shapes and forms. It can be merely in appearance, which Asmo is not afraid of doing. He’s very comfortable about skinship and it’s very apparent in how he dresses and acts that he wants you to adore his body. To worship it! Maybe not sexually, but aesthetically! Being lustful can mean just thinking about sex or sexual scenarios often, which if you take a peek at Asmo’s chat’s either with you or his brothers, is very apparent too.

Personally, I believe that people would assume he is not good in a relationship because he would have a “cheating problem”. I don’t think Asmo is a monster, just like I don’t think any of the brothers are monsters. They may be demons (technically fallen angels) now but they used to be angels too. Their falling out with their Father doesn’t mean they’ve completely abandoned morality, it was a rebellion for Lilith’s right to live. Not for them to sin as they pleased. For all we know they might have been fine in Heaven otherwise! (with the exception of Lucifer.)

A monster knows right from wrong and chooses evil anyways. An ignorant person doesn’t know right from wrong. Asmodeus is not a monster, nor is he ignorant.

When Asmo genuinely loves you, I think he would take steps to calm down that side of him, if it were to exist. Lust is fairly limited, but it is a part of love to some extent. LOVE is vastly different. Love has many languages, and they aren’t all spoken either. For me, personally, I found that Lucifer’s love language can be either very direct, or roundabout so as to not let it go to your head, for an example. Asmo is just far more direct about his care for you.

I feel as though Asmo gets a lot of crap constantly for his presumed nature and because we don’t get to see much else of him at first, especially in season 1, his impression on us sort of stays. With most of the fanbase either somewhat new to the game or somewhere lost in the sea of the difficulty curve that is season 2, we can only assume based on what we’ve seen, and what others have headcanoned about him.

Let’s break and talk about Satan for a moment; this is going somewhere.

I’m led to believe that Satan can control his sin fairly well. He’s easy to get irritated, sure, but he isn’t as much of a walking ball of rage as I suspected. I would argue that, aside from Leviathan, Satan can handle his sin the best out of the brothers. But again, we’re forgetting about Asmo. The Avatar of “Lust”. Like I’ve shown before, he doesn’t really sleep around a lot, according to anon.

At worst, Asmo being flirty is through text and he’s not actively trying to sleep with you. It can be interpreted that way, but for me personally, it comes down to having a friend that is very up close and in your personal space.

(I myself am one of these types of people. Having ADHD, my social cues are always sort of off, and I’ve struggled with coping with it for years. With my best friend, we have seen each other naked countless times and have slept in the same bed as well. We were never romantic with each other. We were just very comfortable being close and personal with each other.)

I’d like to point out also that Asmo isn’t even there for most of season 1 too. Which can give you the idea that maybe he just was out sleeping around a lot, but to me he probably just went out partying a lot. You don’t get known that fast for sleeping around. Maybe in 5,000 years, sure, but I’d imagine being a party boy, as his Devilgram “Guided by Desire” suggests.

So the idea that Asmo isn’t in the house a lot because he’s out having sex all the time isn’t true is it? He’s probably just out partying, which can LEAD to sex with someone sure, but again, Asmo doesn’t feel comfortable doing that, now does he?

I feel like of all the boys, Asmo is the one who radiates with everyone else the most. Most people will never realize how surreal it is that Asmo is faking it until he makes it. He doesn’t always think he’s beautiful, or that he’s worth all the love he’s striving and straining to get. Something that is extremely relatable for a lot of people with self-worth issues. Asmo is just like that, but instead being sarcastic and self-deprecating, he simply works to make himself look as beautiful as possible, so that in his eyes, his beauty matches the affection he gets.

Which is why, when he falls in love with you, it’s strange. You are constantly telling him he’s nice and pretty, but you aren’t lusting after him. You’re just being nice. It may just be me, but when people are overly nice just for the sake of being nice, I’m very attracted to that. That is Asmo, to some extent. The fact that he reflects the insecurities and habits of others so clearly may make others uncomfortable, but that brutal honesty veiled behind insecurity is what a lot of people with self-image issues deal with.

Now for me to share my favorite personal idea for Asmo that completely changed how I saw him in season 1 onwards; Asmodeus is an empath. Now let me explain:

First, what is an Empath?

The term empath comes from empathy, which is the ability to understand the experiences and feelings of others outside of your own perspective. Seems simple, right? Everyone can do this to some extent. However, what makes you an empath is the fact that empaths genuinely feel the same pain as you do. So much so your experience becomes a very personal part of their own. They are capable of being able to feel other people’s emotions without them speaking, or even showing signs of it through their body language.

This would explain, for me personally, why there’s so little of him in season 1. The intensity of what goes on in the house, his sensitive soft-spoken mannerisms, the only time he truly gets mad is when he’s childishly arguing with Mammon? Asmo is afraid of true conflict, he’s afraid of violence and negative emotions. Let’s face it; everyone is indifferent or hates you at the start of the game.

While this changes fairly quickly, all the intense feelings come to a head in chapter 16. All those negative emotions swirling around, of course Asmo isn’t going to want to be in the house when it’s that intense. The attic didn’t just disappear completely, too. Belphie was still in the attic hating humans. That negative emotion could be affecting Asmo and he didn’t know why, so he could have been out of the house more.

Where Asmo can feel the emotions of others, it may mostly be the negative ones because they fill him with anxiety and panic if it persists. Which can be helpful in making him so urgent to want to make others smile and feel better, right?

Imagine being intimate with Asmodeus, and suddenly you aren’t in the mood for it anymore but don’t want to make things awkward. He could pick up on it in an instant and wouldn’t get mad because he understands how you feel completely.

Now to close this out about something that genuinely hurts me; Asmodeus is a narcissist.

I mean, the wiki says that he is, but personally? No, no he isn’t. Since when is loving yourself a bad thing? Sure he may go a bit far sometimes, but people with self-image issues need to go a little harder than the rest to make sure they're getting the love they need.

(Talking about myself AGAIN, but I do this a lot. At random, I will look up in my own mirror in front of my desk that I sit in front of all day and tell myself I am a cute bitch. I am VERY VERY cute and anyone would be lucky to have someone as drop dead gorgeous as myself. I say that a few times a day. In reality, I am very insecure about my looks. I do believe I’m cute, but sometimes it’s hard to say it. Which is why I force myself. Why wouldn’t Asmo do the same?)

Talking yourself up to be as beautiful as a sex god is no easy task, but Asmo isn’t the Avatar of “Lust” for no reason. When an insecure girl talks up her beauty, it’s her being strong and independent. When Asmo does it, its narcissism… it doesn’t really seem fair, now does it? Maybe he’s just an insecure person who needs to tell himself ALL THE TIME that he’s beautiful. That if he stares at his reflection long enough, he may see it too.

(Also, Simeon literally calls him out on being insecure. Insecure people tend to try and overcompensate where they feel they’re lacking.)

”Asmodeus is hinted to be insecure and seeking for love and attention. When Simeon was asked about what he thought of Asmodeus, he says that Asmodeus is still trying to fulfill the role of the angel he used to be; an angel that was adored and loved by many. Asmodeus laughs at Simeon's remark and brushes it off by saying that he is only jealous.” - A section from said Asmodeus Wiki.

People can choose to love or hate Asmo, obviously. Making things up about his character without having anything but speculation and having that dictate how he acts is plain silly. This entire “essay” if you can call it that, comes from the heart. I love Asmo as a character, and in the beginning he did make me uncomfortable, I didn’t like him that much. But I learned to look past that and figure out why he acts the way he does. Something didn’t sit right with me about him for a while, and it was that air of insecurity that I didn’t see at first.

All I can really ask for, is giving Asmo another chance as a character. He’s not as wild and wacky as Mammon, or as cool and sexy as Lucifer, or as edgy and precious as Belphie, but he matters in this story too. He fell from grace with his brothers for Lilith. Give him another chance, and let him show you that he is the Avatar of Love.