#app: do split squats

[facultyloungecosplay]

Uuuuuughghghghghhhhhh 🫠

[love-me-satoru]

Besties

toji fushiguro x ryomen sukuna x fem! reader

summary: you’re best friends with these two man sluts. teasing doesn’t work in your favor but it does in theirs.

warnings: SIZE KINK :), pussy eating, Toji And Sukuna it's a crazy pairing in a way, slight brat, mean toji, ooc sukuna (he's softer than normal) teasing, pet name use (baby, pretty girl, brat, sweetheart), talk of safe words, messy shit, Sukuna having boundaries? A lot of dialogue, brat-taming

word count: 7.2k words (DAMN)

a/n: please guys this has to be one of the longest fics I’ve ever written I may have also been under the influence of something when I wrote this monster please let a girl know how I’ve done. thank you! :)

Believing you could take two of the biggest men you’ve ever met makes you clinically insane. Toji Fushiguro and Ryomen Sukuna. Being 5’1” on a good day makes you extremely small. Compared to Toji 6’ stance and Sukuna’s 7’ stance. Your legs tremble at the thought of being split open by either of them. With those two being some of your closest friends. When you first met them, they would always tease you for your height. The normal tall people things. Using you as an arm rest while standing, squatting down to meet your height and holding all your items above your head. All the normal tall people shit. But when you started fighting back it caught them off guard. They would start teasing you, and you’d tease them right back. The only difference was you played dirty. And I mean dirty. When it would be you and Toji or you and Sukuna, you would run your hand over their hard chest. It just happened to be Toji this time. The tight compression shirts leave little to imagine. slowly tracing over his nice abs.

“If you would stop teasing me. I'd probably let you do more to me, baby.” He lets out a rough groan. “Sucks you keep being mean to me” as you show a little pout. He has the fuck me eyes right now. You can see the slight bulge in his pants. But all you do is turn around and walk away from him. As much as you want to jump his bones. You want to play hard to get. But his large hand wrapped around your wrist. Pulling you back towards him. Effectively pushing your ass against Toji's hardening cock. “You know sweetheart. If you did this dirty shit to Sukuna he wouldn't have hesitated to bend you over any surface.” ”Yeah But ‘Kuna isn't here Toji. You are.”

Toji slowly leaned down to your small little ear... “And dirty little sluts don’t get what they want, isn't that right baby?” His voice made you whimper. You didn't notice you began grinding on his clothed cock but he noticed almost immediately stopping your hips. “What do you think you're doing sweetheart? Sluts don't get to play with my cock.” You didn't think your plan would backfire as much as it did. You thought you'd get a little hate fucking session. Quick and easy, Not the teasing back, the lewd words coming from his throat. “What did I get myself into” saying slightly under your breath all while looking away from Toji. His hand snaked up your front to around your throat. Making you look at him again. “Oh, pretty girl you just gave me the best idea.” His grip never loosened. He used his free hand to pull his phone out. Opening the camera app. Pulling you flush against his front. Facing the camera towards you. You tried to push his phone away but one look from him made you stop. “Smile for ‘Kuna pretty girl.”

Ding! Ding!

From Fushiguro

Look at this fucking slut

[image attachment]

Opening his phone seeing the picture of you pressed up against Toji’s body. Made him feel some kind of way it’s crazy how much smaller you are compared to Toji. He couldn't wait to see the difference between you and him.

Ding! Ding!

From Sukuna

Send another

“Oh look, pretty girl.” he slowly waves his phone in your face. “He wants more. Spread your legs for me” You’re staring at Toji just a bit shocked. “Did I stutter slut?” Remaining silent you shook your head. “Mhm? Oh, sorry princess I didn't hear you.” you're slightly trembling against him. “No Toji you didn't.” he lets out a small chuckle.“That’s right baby, I didn't. You thought you could get one on me. But who's winning right now?”

“You are Toji.”

"Mhm, that's right. You gonna listen baby?” His phone is still in hand. Tapping your thigh with said phone. You relaxed against him. slowly spreading your legs for Toji. You can feel how wet you are right now dripping down your legs. Silently cursing yourself for not wearing any panties. You know they're going to have a field day with it. “Come on princess. I'm waiting.” Looking back up at Toji, his eyes no longer the pretty green you loved to stare at when he wasn't looking. His eyes were deeper than the deep sea. As you finally get your knees apart. The hand that was around your throat ran down to your core. “Oh shit. You are a slut. Huh, princess?” you immediately shook your head no. “No panties?” “No…” Toji just laughs. “Mhm. Sure princess.” He slowly starts teasing you through your folds. Pulling out soft whimpers from you. Tensing up slightly when he slides over your pulsing clit. “Relax baby. We still gotta take a picture for ‘Kuna.” Toji slowly starts teasing your sopping-wet hole. “God baby. You’re just so wet I could just..” as he slips his middle finger inside you. pulling a loud moan from you. “Oops. Sorry pretty girl. It just slipped in. I forget that you’re so small. And one of my fingers is too much.”

Softly moaning out, with him slowly easing his finger in and out of you. “To..ji..” He slowly places his head in the crook of your neck. Leaving small kisses behind running up to your ear. “Yes, pretty girl?” Slowly picking up the pace finger fucking your tight little cunt. Your moans getting louder and louder. “Toji! The picture..” Moaning out quite loud g His lips form a smirk. “Wanna show Sukuna how much of a slut you are?” tears are forming in your eyes “Yes Toji!” Just his one finger is hitting all the right places. Continuously hitting the right spot. “I’m going to put another one in Princess. Go ahead and cum for me..”

He shoves a second finger into you. Kissing insanely close to your walls. Immediately tightening up around him. “Gonna.. cum Toji!!” His pace becomes unforgiving pumping deep inside you, his thumb brushing over your clit every second. “Come for me, princess wanna watch you fall apart on my fingers.” Feeling too gone to speak you nod your head repetitively moaning out his name. clenching around his fingers hard still nonstop. You scream out squirting all over his hand. “Holy fuck baby… Keep going for me..” He starts to slow down But keeping his fingers inside of you. “You ready baby?” “mhm..” Toji finally takes the picture. Just with his fingers deep inside your pretty cunt.

Toji didn't even care that there was 5 miss messages and 2 missed calls from Sukuna.

Ding! Ding!

From Fushigurio

Sorry got a little busy

[image attachment]

Sukuna texts back immediately.

Ding! Ding!

From Sukuna

Where are you.

Toji just laughs.

You're still to fucked out to comprehend what's going on.

Ding! Ding!

From Fushiguro

My room. She’s pretty fucked out rn. I'm pretty sure she'll be able to take more.

Ding! Ding!

From Sukuna

Bet

Not even 10 minutes later Sukuna was there. You passed out on the couch. “Look at her” Toji’s smirking.

“she’s really out of it huh?”

“She basically fell asleep the moment i took the picture.”

“oh really?” “Oh yeah.” Toji’s laughed.

“She’s literally so fucking hot.”

“I knew if I kept teasing her she would slip up eventually.” they’re honestly just watching you sleep.

"You know its rude to watch people sleep. and kinda creepy." You're slowly starting to sit up.

"It's also really rude to fall asleep on someone." Toji laughs out. "it's not my fault! you're just mean." you pout slightly.

Sukuna's eyes found your pretty little face. Their eyes met for a second. then the same evil smirk showed on Toji's face. "Oh sweet girl did you not learn your lesson the first time?" your eyes shot to his immediately turning black. Toji likes to get real up close and personal, and pulls you into his lap. Making you straddle his lap. His big hands wrapped around the globes of your ass slightly squeezing.

Your hands rest on his shoulders. You were sitting up straight your back slightly arching. Toji's hands roam up and down your back. You knew what he was doing. He was trying to make the Great Ryomen Sukuna jealous. You knew that Sukuna always wanted a little piece of you and so did Toji. "God. You look so fuckin good baby" Toji slowly snuggled his head into the crook of your neck. You angle your neck slightly so he can leave small kisses. Which turns into love bites. which causes you to moan. Which brought an evil smile from Toji. Sukuna's grip around the edge of the couch tightened. “You know brat, it's is rude that this loser gets all the attention when the king is back" You glance at Sukuna slightly and he walks up behind you. wrapping his massive hand around your throat making you look at him. Pressing his hard-on against your back. "Kuna..." a slight whine came from you. Sukuna let go of your throat and step back away from you. "None of that brat." looking up at Sukuna pouting all so slightly. "Quit looking at me like that brat, You won't be able to walk if you keep on." Your pouting continued, looking up at Sukuna “You’re lucky Toji has a hold on you right now. Because if you were in my room.” as he gets all up close and personal, “You would be mine.”

Just because they were the ones to tease it was your turn to do a little teasing. You weren’t sure what you would do. But a few days later you took a small trip to the mall hoping for it to be the best revenge. It quite literally took you all day to find something you knew both of the boys were going to love. The real question you had for yourself was who was going to rip it off. Kuna. Defiantly Sukuna. Toji would try and get to you first But with Sukuna and his size it was going to be him. Slowly treading back to your home knowing you're supposed to visit the boys tonight. This time you're going to Sukuna first not Toji. Slipping on the special piece. And just a set of grey sweats. You make it over to your best friend’s house. You have your key to their house so you just walked right in. Meeting Sukuna in the living room. Shirtless. Sexy as ever. Your eyes lingered on Sukuna hard. Don't think that went unnoticed. he chuckled "Lookin' a little hard huh sweetheart?" his laugh pulling you back from reality. "No!" slightly blushing running into a different room to run into Toji. "Hey there pretty girl." "Um... hi." as you slowly start walking backward. Toji slowly creeping back up on you. Completely forgetting about the pink-haired menace in the other room. Backing into Sukuna, his big ass hands placed on your shoulders as he bends down to whisper something in your ear. "Where do you think you're going, sweetheart?" Frozen. Trapped between these two big ass men. “uh..” Your eyes are locked on Toji. he’s getting closer. Sukuna still holding on to you. “You know pretty girl... We saw you at the mall today.” Hearing that your eyes widen.

“You did.?”

“Oh yeah.”

Sukuna’s hand runs down your side, sliding his hand to the base of your sweats. “I wonder if she’s wearing it right now.”

Toji is now right in front of you. his hand running over your warm face. making you look directly at him. “So are you pretty girl?” “Huh..?” your mind is completely mush by now being surrounded by these two men. Your plan failed completely.

“We didn’t even touch you yet and you’re already acting all fucked out baby.” By now sukuna ran his hand into your sweats. cupping your cunt in the process.

“she’s fucking soaked.”

“bet she is.I’m gonna ask one more time pretty girl. Are you wear it right now?”

“Yes!” you said a little too fast for your liking. You really wanted to hold back but they were becoming too overwhelming. And the ache in your core was almost too much to bare. “You gonna tell us why you’re wearing it baby?”

Your face reddens at the pet name. It's not a foreign name. Toji would usually use it. But when it slipped from Sukuna’s mouth it got you.

“I wanted to tease you both..” You said a lot quieter than intended.

“I bet you look so sexy under these clothes huh baby?”

Sukuna’s hands reach the bottom of your hoodie. silently pleading to take it off. You felt hot. Hotter than usual.

“Baby. I'm going to ruin you.” Sukuna whispers in your ear. He pulls your hoodie clean off. Toji just watching at the sight. Seeing the way your tits sit just right. The small straps run across your chest and around your pretty little neck.

“Oh baby look how hard Toji is right now.”

Looking directly at Toji again. Seeing his hand gripping the outline of his dick is making you feel things. “Please..”

“Please what baby?” Sukuna’s hands run down to your waistband again.

“Please fuck me!”

With that Sukuna threw you over his shoulder making his way to his room Toji not far behind. Once he made it there he threw you on the bed pulling your sweats completely off in one fell swoop. Feeling your face get hot again with these two men staring down at you. You immediately covered your face. “All shy now huh?” Toji’s deep voice echoed out. “Leave me alone!” you said playfully. Sukuna pulls you by your ankles to the edge of the bed. leaning over pressing his hard-covered cock against your soaked cunt to be face to face with you. “Do you really want us to leave you all hot and bothered baby?” “No..” Toji chuckles to the side of you both. “I thought so. So you might want to show yourself because we’ll walk away now.” You moved your hands away from your face looking directly into Sukuna’s now deep black eyes. The smirk that forms is damn near deadly. Sukuna presses his hot lips against yours. It's like he's been dreaming of it. His tongue fighting his way into your mouth, you let him in gladly. Moaning into the kiss. “As much as I like to watch this. I think I deserve a little something too don't you think pretty girl?” Toji said slightly annoyed. Pulling away from Sukuna looking at Toji. His cock still pressing hard against his sweats.

“Come here, you big baby,” you said teasingly. “You better watch your tone with me you brat,” Toji said sharply. The edge in his voice almost had you folded. But you just shot back harder. “Make me,” you said with a slight smirk.

He makes his way towards you fast Sukuna knowing what he's going to do moves to the side and his hand makes it around your throat in seconds. Toji pulls you close, his nose touching yours. “You have no idea what you just started brat.” his lips hit yours hard , all teeth trying to fight for the dominance. With Sukuna watching how much you're fighting Toji. Sukuna chuckles out loud. "what you laughing at" as Toji pulls away from you a pout prominent on your face. "Nothing man, just something i noticed." Toji raised an eyebrow at him. You're just whimpering from the lost touch. Sukuna comes back to you grabbing your chin, making you look up at him. "What do you want baby?" you have these cute little puppy dog eyes staring back at him " I want you 'Kuna.. Toji's being mean." the pout on your face getting bigger. Toji's scowling on the side. Sukuna notices immediately and smirks. Sukuna presses his lips onto yours again harder and once again you let him slip is tounge into your mouth letting is tounge fight with yours. when he pulls away again while you whine.

"See how she summits to me but not you"

"what a fuckin' brat"

As you sit up from the bed. looking at Toji.

"I’m not a brat!" you yelled at him.

"Say that again" Toji standing in front of you again.

"Im. Not. A. Brat." you said poking his chest after every word.

Toji just watched you, Sukuna knew this was going to happen eventually. You were a hothead when you didn't get what you wanted and so was Toji. You're a brat at heart even if you weren't going to agree you were.

You could feel the shift in the air. "you know brat, if you just admit you are one ill give you what you want the most."

"I'm not a brat but whatever," you said under your breath, not like they didn't hear you.

Toji's hand wrapped around your throat again. pushing you into sukuna's bed and ran his hand down to your core. with you being the brat that you are you tried to close your legs. But sukuna's hands stopped you. ripping your legs open.

"you traitor!" you spit. Now mad at both of them.

"I was never on any sides baby. I just want to see that pretty cunt"

You tried to fight against them both. but with them being huge compared to you. you knew you would never win. Toji's hand now running over you slick covered panties. causing you to slightly flinch from the touch.

"Oh? the little brat is sensitive huh. We haven't even touched you" You're silent for once just staring at him his hand still wrapped around your throat, when he slips is hand into your panties.

"You're lucky im not ripping these off right now" You tried to look away from him but his hand is keeping you firmly in one spot making you to only look at him. his eyes boring into you. When his finger finds your clit. you yelp out with how sensitive it is. "fuck!."

"Oh? look at that." Toji said smirking

You're getting fed up with all the teasing. "Stop teasing me already!"

"oh no Toji she's starting to have an attitude. Might want to fix that" sukuna said laughing. Toji's hand slipped out quicky. and slapped your cunt unexpectedly causing you to moan out. Both toji and sukuna laughed at the response you gave. "I didn't take you for being a little pain slut"

"maybe if you would actually fuck me, you'd hear more"

" Or i could do this" As he slaps your cunt again. more moans fell from your mouth.You can't take it anymore. the lack of actual touch is too much. "Please! Toji I'm Sorry!"

"Sorry for what brat" his smirk forming already. "I'm sorry for being a brat!" the ache between your legs is screaming at you. "thats a good girl." he slips off your panties quickly.

“Look at this fuckin cunt. so fucking wet for me.” Toji quickly drops to his knees throwing one of your legs over his shoulder.

“I’ve been waiting to taste this fucking cunt since the last time.” Sukuna gave him a dirty look after that comment.

"Toji!" you whined out. Toji licked a long stripe from your hole to your clit and started sucking tour clit hard to have you trashing against his tongue he wrapped his arm around your other leg to hold you still but with him eating you out like a starved man had you moaning out a lot. "I'm close!" Toji's eyes caught yours and and a small smirk formed. You threw your head back when he started sucking on your clit again when he felt you tense up a lot he pulled away.

"Toji! What the fuck!" you screamed out.

He slaps your cunt, and laughs. "You really thought i was going to let you cum after the way you talked to me sweetheart?"

"ugh!" you whined out.

Toji loved this sight of you. A literal mess. Toji got up to sit next to you and Sukuna took his place. you're really hoping Sukuna will let you cum.

"Just be a good girl maybe we'll let you cum sweetheart"

Looking down at Sukuna with begging eyes. "Please 'Kuna.. wanna cum.."

"Relax baby. Just let me enjoy this."

As he said that he went in face first going immediately to your clit. Its already extremely sensitive from Toji's abuse. "Oh. My.. God."

"There's no god here baby. Just me" Sukuna said then going right back to devouring your cunt. He's sucking sloppily through your folds. catching your clit every other second. Toji has been palming his cock while watching you. You're getting close again. slightly tensing up. "Can i come please "Kuna.."

Sukuna locked eyes with Toji. With a slight nod from him. Sukuna went down harder you moaned out loudly. Toji's hand ran over your tits. "oh fuck! I'm so close!"

"Go ahead cum for us baby."

Sukuna ends up slipping two fingers inside of you, sucking harshly on your clit. From that moment you tensed up that deep tension building up in the lower part of your stomach you came. hard. As you push your cunt deeper into Sukuna's face riding out the rest of your high. You relaxed down heavily breathing.

"Honestly man, you should of let her cum."

Toji just let out a soft hum. "it doesn't matter, I rather have her cum on my dick."

Toji got back up but this time he stands at his full height and he pulls out his cock.

Your eyes widen, you've never seen a dick that big before. he had to be maybe 9 or 10 inches long and he was fucking thick. "Like what you see princess." Toji said with a smug smirk on his face.

"its not going to fit Toji."

'Oh don't worry. Ima gonna make it fit."

Your body is still super weak, as you tried to snake your way up the bed away from Toji. He caught your ankles pulling you back so his cock is just at the entrance of your sweet cunt.

"Don't worry baby, he's just a warm up. im really going to break you" Sukuna said laughing You felt your face get red. If Toji was fucking big, Sukuna had to be fucking huge.

"Honestly baby. You know of the color system?"

"Yes.. Red for stop, Yellow for Slow, and Green for i’m good"

"Good.. if Anything doesn't feel right just say the word."

"Okay.." You're just staring at Toji he slapped his cock directly on your burning red clit, moaning out his name "Please Toji.. I'm sensitive.."

Sukuna is standing next to you pulling out his own cock. your mouth agape. he was bigger than toji. its honestly fucking scary how that's going to fit in you.

"Hey. Eyes on me pretty girl." Toji slowly started easing his cock inside of you.

"Oh fuck!" the stretch of his cock is almost unbearable

"Oh fuck man, you're so fuckin' tight baby."

he continued to ease himself in slowly, barely half way in. "God baby you gotta relax. I'm not even half way."

"It's not my fault your dick is so fucking big!"

Toji just chuckles he knows he's big. But the teasing never stops. Sukuna laughs to himself from the comment but he then eases himself onto the bed next to you. his sweats abandoned next to the bed. "Look at me baby" Your eyes caught Sukuna's eyes. Seeing his cock leaking with precum so close to your face. "Open your mouth baby." And like a good girl you did. Opening as wide as you can. and he just slips just the tip into your mouth. tasting all of his salty taste. humming slightly against his tip causing sukuna to moan out. With you distracted a bit Toji fully sheathed all 10 inches inside of you. which made you moan against Sukuna's cock. you felt his dick twitch on your mouth.

"Holy shit man. Her fucking cunt feels great."

"Her mouth is great too" You felt Toji's cock twitch slightly inside you and it made you moan out again. You take out sukuna's cock from your mouth. "Please move Toji. wanna feel you."

He slowly starts pumping in and out of you. Sukuna quickly puts his cock back into your mouth. The constant moans coming from your mouth are making Sukuna tremble with pleasure. "Holy fuck baby. I'm gonna cum soon." Toji starts picking up his pace. His hands firmly on your hips. Sukuna slowly shoves his dick down your throat. It feels like your jaw is about to break but you just want all of him down your throat. Sukuna's hand wraps around your throat forcing his cock a little farther down.

"Oh god. me too." sukuna moans out.

Sukuna picks up his pace and starts fucking your throat and you welcomed him eagerly. Gagging ever so often when Sukuna pushes a little too far. "You gonna take my cum right princess?" You hummed around him with him taking that as a yes and fills your pretty little throat. Which causes you to clench hard around Toji. "Holy fuck." Sukuna pulls his cock out of your mouth. Your first thought was how the fuck was he still hard.

"You better swallow all of it princess, or i won't be as nice later." You weren't planning on being a brat. But you kinda want him to be mean. just to see what would happen. But with Toji's hard cock still beating at your core you weren't sure how much more you could take. You swallowed every little bit of his come. Opening your mouth to show him.

"Thats a good girl."

"I'm about to blow my load baby, where do you want it." Toji struggles to get out. Moaning in between each thrust. "Inside me Please!" while you moan out, Toji's thrusts start to get harder and harder his balls slapping your ass continuously.

"I'm coming Toji!" You clenched hard around Toji's cock. So hard he couldn't move anymore. as he tried to force his cock as deep as he could. You moaned out loud squirting all over Toji as he empty his seed deep inside of you. He's trying to keep pumping but with how much your cunt is squeezing him he can't move an inch. "I didn't know you could do that baby." Sukuna said with a light coo.

"Mhmm..." You're gone, mind completely blank. The only thing going through your mind right now was how much was Sukuna going to fill you.

"You okay baby? What's your color?" Toji said softly as he's pulling out his cock.

"Green.. So Green" you sung out softly.

"I'm surprised you can actually make out words this time Princess."

"Stop being so mean to her Toji."

Toji just rolled his eyes.

"You got enough energy baby, want to come for us one more time?"

"Want both of you.."

"Woah baby, slow your roll. Don't you think it would be a bit much?"

You shook your head “no. both"

"Oh baby."

"No 'Kuna! i want both of you now." your pout deep on your face. Your eyes firmly on Sukuna. Your eyes are just begging for him to fuck you.

"This is what happens when you don't tame the brat 'kuna" he laugh while he sung his name.

"Shut up Toji." Sukuna scowled at him.

"Please 'kuna.." You beg. "You know Sukuna. We never actually got to play with these perfect tits." "Yeah! Play with me 'Kuna!" "Yeah come play with her 'Kuna." Toji teased. Sukuna scowling again.

Toji helps you sit up just a bit for him to slip in behind you.

Your back is pressed flush again Toji's front. You can still feel Toji's hard on pressing against you but you didn't really care. You just wanted Sukuna to play with you again. Toji's hands immediately found your tits. You moaned out softly. Toji's usually on the rougher side. With him being so soft with you now has you becoming putty in his very hands.

"Im gonna take this off okay baby?"

"okay..Toji.."

He's slowly unhooking your bra leaving small kisses behind.

"You're so good for me." More soft kisses ran down your neck. as he completely unhooked your bra, throwing it to the floor.

"Look at her 'Kuna. She's so pretty like this right?" Toji started to leave small hickeys down your neck. After every time he sucks down on your neck you moan out toji's name.

Sukuna is trying so hard to not give in. Knowing that you're a big girl. You can always safe word out. but he feels like he needs to hold back. Toji's hands roamed all over your body again. His fingers catch your nipple in between your fingers. Soft moans of his name come out again. "spread your legs for me, baby. show 'kuna what he's missing out on." Toji whispered in your ear. So being the tease Toji is making you out to be. You threw your legs over Toji's spreading your legs wide all for sukuna. "You sure you don't wanna play with me 'Kuna?" One of Toji's hands ran down to your core. One of them stopped at your tits heavily teasing your nipple and running his fingers through your folds.

"Please 'Kuna.." Sukuna is fucking throbbing right now. He can see the remnants of Toji's cum dripping out of your abused hole. You can see Sukuna's cock twitching from the sight of you. His precum is leaking all over himself.

"wanna cum toji please.." your body relaxes against Toji. "You want my cock again princess?" You knew Toji was hard. He's been hard this whole time. Just like Sukuna. The only difference here is Toji doesn't care. He wants to make you happy fuck all the morals.

"Yes Toji please.. Want your cock inside me" Toji's smirking at Sukuna. But he makes quick work of you, lifting you up. His arms under your legs. As he just slips his cock right inside of you. Like it was made for only you. He fits in so snug. Your cunt dripping all over his balls. Already squeezing his dick tightly.

"Oh my God!"

"Go ahead baby tell 'Kuna how good I'm making you feel." Toji's half ass smirk at Sukuna. Sukuna is standing there. His cock in hand because he can't take it anymore. he's fucking leaking all over his own hand.

"Kuna.. please.."

"That's not what i said to say baby." as he's slowly lifting you off his cock.

"Please Toji! I'm sorry!" He slowly stops "Go ahead baby. say it"

"Toji Is making me feel so good 'Kuna!" as Toji slams you down on his cock moaning out his name. "Wanna cum Toji please!"

"You better hold it pretty girl." His cock is slamming into your G spot repeatedly. "Holy fuck! Toji please!"

"Nah fuck this." Toji looked up at Sukuna. He's fucking mad. "Oh 'Kuna are you ready to fuck the little brat?"

"Shut up Toji." Sukuna's eyes boring into Toji as he smirks. "Oh? he's mad mad. this should be fun to watch." he whispers into your ear. Sukuna forceful pulled you off of Toji. You whimpered when Toji's cock slipped out of you. After being so close again. You know your cunt might not be able to take another beating but you're willing to try. Sukuna throws you down on to the bed. Basically manhandling you. Climbing over you and caging in your small frame. His eyes are burning into your body, loving how close you are to him. Your hand ran up his chest.

" 'Kuna.?" his hands grabbed yours pinning it to the bed.

"Oh no, little girl. You're in so much trouble." His eyes somehow darkened even more. Nothing but two black pools. filled his eyes. "All this fucking teasing.." As Sukuna slowly leaving his own marks along your neck, bigger and darker. You tried to pull your hands from Sukuna but his grip just got tighter. You moaned out his name. " 'Kuna please.." Sukuna's leaving small bite marks down your tits. catching one of your nipples in between his teeth. which made you cry out.

"Sukuna Please!"

he just laughs..

Toji's moved from the bed sitting in a chair on the side watching sukuna take you over. his hard cock in hand. Slowly stroking himself.

"You getting off on this you perv" Sukuna snapped then laughed.

"You know you were just jerking off to us, so who's really the perv." Sukuna growled. Turning his focus back to you his hands still locked with yours.

"You're being mean 'Kuna.." "Oh? I'm being mean?

"Yes! I've been so good for you 'Kuna.!"

His hand wraps around your throat fast. "Have you really though? This attitude. I don't care if its directed to Toji, Not Me Yes?"

"Yes Sir.." He chuckles to himself. He then lets go of you hands. "Don't move your hands. little girl." his voice stern. You wouldn't dare move your hands. leaving them above your head where he placed them and he ran his free hand down your perfect naked body. While he continued. "Next. the pouting for not getting what you want. Oh, Baby you looked so cute while you were begging for me. But you were pouting the whole time. And I don't reward pouty little girls." He trapped your nipple in between his index finger and thumb pulling it hard causing you to slightly moan out. "Oh and finally the teasing." he's still holding you down by your throat. he slaps your tit once causing you to cry out. A small smirk is forming on his face. "The fucking teasing.. Showing me that pretty little cunt.. " he pulls your legs apart with one hand and runs his fingers through your folds. then slaps your bare cunt which causes you to scream out. "Oh baby and then I had to stand there and watch Toji fuck that pretty little cunt AGAIN. You could've had my cock baby, but you wanted to be greedy. and try and get both but you ended up settling for who's cock?"

"For Toji's" you said meekly.. looking away from Sukuna's eyes

As he immediately caught your chin to make you look at him again. His eyes burning into yours. "For Who's brat" his voice stern again.

"For Toji's Sir!"

"What are we not going to do next time princess?"

"Be greedy sir."

"What are you going to do princess?"

"Take what I am given."

"That's a good girl."

"You're going to be a good girl for me now princess?"

"Yes sir."

"Go ahead and lay down on your back for me baby and let you head hang off the edge a little." As you get into position. Sukuna stands by the edge of the bed. once you set your head down Sukuna taps on your lips. "Open up wide for me baby." His cock is in front of you again. As you open up you stuck your tongue out as much as you can. Sukuna smears all the precum on his tip onto your tongue. "Like that baby?" all you tried to do was nod your head. "Be ready baby." Your tongue never moved. Sukuna slowly eased his cock into your mouth. he softly moaned out while you welcomed him fully. Hallowing your throat out so he can easily force more of his cock into your mouth. you moan out softly against his cock. "God you feel so fucking good baby" Sukuna's hand grips your throat. Fully shoving his cock deep down your throat. "Oh fuck baby.."

Toji's watching from the sidelines. Watching how your pretty little throat is taking all of Sukuna. His dick getting painfully hard once again. "Oh fuck.."

"What Toji can't keep your dick under control" Sukuna teases.

"Shut the fuck up Sukuna." Toji growled.

"Just lay here and take it baby." Sukuna starts fucking your face hard. Gagging noises falling from your mouth. His balls continuously slapping your face. You felt his cock twitch against your throat. Drool is dripping out the sides of your mouth after every thrust of his hips.

"God i could never get tired of your throat baby."

You're moaning around his cock constantly.

"I'm gonna fill your pretty little throat baby."

His grip around your neck tighten a bit and shoved his cock as far as he could filling your throat full with his seed. A mix of grunts and moans fall from his mouth. "Oh fuck baby." he pulls out his still hard dick from your mouth. "you better swallow it all princess."

As you swallowed all of his cum, You stuck out your tongue just to show him that you did.

"Look at you baby, being such a good girl"

"Thank.. you sir.." You're tired, there's no way your throat isn't bruised.

Sukuna picked you up knowing you can't really move. "Can you take anymore princess?" You're really falling hard into subspace. All you want to do is please everyone "Yes! please.. Want You sir.." "Since you finally learned how to be a good girl you can pick how I'm going to take you princess."

"Can Toji play with us too Sir?"

Sukuna rolled his eyes then looked directly at Toji.

"Sure baby since you've been so good"

" I want you to take me from behind 'kuna.. please"

"Where do you want me pretty girl?"

"in front of me.. i wanna suck your cock Toji.."

"Need help princess?"

“ Yes sir.. please..”

Sukuna helps you stand up slowly spinning you around. so you could crawl onto the bed. Crawling onto the bed on your hands and knees. also placing yourself in-between Toji's legs seeing his cock already leaking again. You start leaving little kitten licks all over the head of Toji's cock. All while Sukuna runs the palm of his hand over the plump of your ass.

"You shouldn't tease pretty girl." Grabbing the base of Toji's cock, wrapping your small hand around it. slowly jerking him off. while sucking his tip. “You’re teasing. pretty girl..”

you look up at Toji. eyes locked on each other. When you fully take him down your throat. "there you go." your hand moved from his base to his balls lightly squeezing. "Holy shit baby" as Toji throws his head back.

“She’s fuckin great with her mouth huh?”

“Oh fuck yeah”

Then Sukuna's slowly running his fingers through your folds. "God baby you're so wet." He inserts 2 fingers inside of soaked hole causing you to moan against Toji’s cock.

“Shit man. If you keep making her do that I’m gonna blow already.”

"I'm sure she'll love it right baby?" a muffled noise came from you not wanting to release him from your mouth and Toji groaned.

Sukuna started curling his fingers inside of you, you're already close squeezing around Sukuna's fingers.

"Oh baby you gonna cum baby?" Pulling off of Toji. "Yes.." Toji's hand grabbed a handful of your hair. Moans forced from your throat. "A messy little thing you huh pretty girl?"

“uh..huh.” whines now coming from you with Toji holding on to you and Sukuna fingering your cunt. You’re about to lose it. Sukuna’s fingers get deeper and faster. “Wanna cum! please!” you scream out. Toji immediately shoves his cock back into your mouth. Your nose kissing his happy trail. Sukuna pulls his fingers out of you, he’s over the torture he’s been putting himself through. You whined from the loss of touch from Sukuna which caused him to give you a firm smack on your ass. Jolting you forward, forcing you further onto Toji's cock. Toji moans out but his grip loosens from your hair and Sukuna's hand replaces it pulling you completely off of Toji. Pulling your small frame against his huge one. His cock is pressing hard into your ass.

"What did I say about the pouting Brat." His voice is stern, right up against your ear. Too stunned to speak. His voice and his body making you all hot and bothered. Being so close.

His grip gets tighter and his free hand wraps around your neck more whines coming from you. "What did I say little girl."

"You don't reward.. Pouty little girls.."

"That's right.." His hand releases your throat and runs down your body. "And what did you do wrong little girl" His hand meeting your core. Toji and Sukuna both looking at you. Your eyes are silently pleading with Sukuna. Toji moves to you and spreads your legs just enough for Sukuna's cock to slip between your folds teasing your clit slightly.

"fuck.." you whispered out. Looking down at his cock. every slight twitch of his cock it hits your clit just enough to tease. but not enough to help.

"kuna please.."

"Oh now you want to talk brat. All i wanted to do was prep you for me Princess. but since you wanted to be a little brat. I guess you don't need it huh baby. You gonna take me like a big girl?"

"Yes Sir! Please!"

Sukuna makes quick work of you bending you back over. Your back in a pretty arch, as he completely sinks all 10 inches inside your pretty little cunt.

"Oh.My.Fuck!"

"Oh No no pretty girl. you gonna take it right." it was more a statement than a question but with your mushed out brain you really couldn't tell a difference.

"Yes! Please fuck me sir!"

His cock is fucking aching. He gave no mercy. slamming his cock at unholy speed. A mix of moans and screams are pulled from you. Sukuna had a rough grip on your hips. knowing if he was holding any tighter there would be bruises.

"I'm close 'Kuna! Please let me cum!"

His pace is unforgiving. the sound of his hips meeting your ass echoed through out the room.Your cunt clenched around Sukuna's cock hard. "You better not fucking cum."

You're about to lose it stuffing your face into the mattress sobs and tears falling from you.

"Sukuna please! I can't hold it!"

his cock continues to bully your cervix. his cock finally twitching inside of you. Feeling him twitch slightly made you tighten around him again."Fucking cum for me brat" his hand met your ass. As he's drilling into you somehow harder. Screaming his name, you squirted all over him. As he forces his cock deeper inside you filling your womb with his seed.

"Holy fucking shit baby."

You're gone. Your mind. Your body. Everything from this point is gone from you. Your eyes shut immediately falling into a deep slumber.

"Holy shit. Did she pass out?" Toji sounding a little worried.

"She definitely did." Sukuna pulled his now spent cock out of your cunt. a quiet whimper came from you while you slightly shifted on the bed.

"At least she's still alive" Toji joked.

"Shut up Toji. You might want to go get cleaned up pretty boy. Looks like you had a little fun" as Sukuna pointed at Toji's messy cock.

"And you say I'm the perv." As Toji walks out

Sukuna just rolled his eyes. Slowly lifting you to move you closer to the head of the bed. More whimpers just falling from you. “Kuna..” the softest whisper came from you. “Hold on baby. Imma clean you up a bit” a loud whine came from you. Your eyes were still closed but the loss of his touch made you whine. “Fine you little brat,” he said chuckling. He snuggles up next to you throwing a blanket he had nearby over the both of you.

[forcedtogrow]

I've been going to the gym for a few months now, can I message you to ask about tips/routines?

Please feel free to message me if u want more specifics. I personally run a traditional Push Pull Legs split, with 2 days a week for push right now

So for example

Sunday- legs

Monday-push

Tuesday-off

Wednesday-pull

Thursday-off

Friday-push

Saturday-off and/or abs circuit day/myoreps to absolute failure (at home workout)

Legs:

I keep it simple

Barbell squats 5x5

Hip thrusts 4x10-12

Leg press-this one is a little odd. I do one set for 10 reps and then rest 20 seconds and do 10 more reps of that same weight; I do this twice (so, 4 sets total). Use a lower weight as needed

Calf press(whatever machine is available) 5x14-20

Leg extensions 2x12-15 or a drop set

Push:

Barbell bench press- 7 set doing a pyramid style of adding weight and lowering weight throughout the sets (think=structure of the app nSuns) I do this to failure for each weight and don’t care about 1RM at all

Decline bench 3 sets to failure

Incline bench 3 sets to failure (usually 10-12)

Seated shoulder press (arms should be slightly angled in, not straight out) 4x8-12

Dumbbell lateral raise 3 to failure (8-12)

Overhead press 3-5 sets

Reverse cable fly (ESSENTIAL for big shoulders, do not skip. This will likely be very difficult at first bc these muscle are not used often and you should use a low weight to start) 3x10-12 or to failure if I want my upper body to look thiiiccc if im going out after or whtevr

Tricep dip 3 sets to failure (hits short head of Tricep)

Tricep overhead extension 3 sets to failure (hits long head of Tricep)

yeah I know my push day is crazy, but it works. not great for beginners to do this much, so I’d cut out decline bench and pick btwn seated shoulder press and overhead press to avoid injury

Pull:

Deadlift 5x5

Bent over barbell row 3x8-12

T-bar 3x10-12

Lat pull down (wide grip) 3 sets to failure (8-12 at least)

Lat pull down (v bar or close grip) 3 sets to failure, lower weight as needed to get reps in with good form

Cable row (wide grip) 3x12+ make sure you are pull the bar to the bottom of your rib cage to engage your entire back

Back extension (weighted) 2x20 if possible, just body weight if you’ve never done this

Preacher curl 4 sets to absolute failure (must be failure for growth here) at a weight you can do at least 12 reps of while maintaining form

Cross body curl 2x8-12

Cable hammer curl drop set

(I switch up bicep exercises, these are just my current)

This is my basic run-down; I try to avoid accessory movements and stick with compound lifts. For me, hitting all 3 benches is non-negotiable, but I am neurotic. Some good beginner resources are athleanx, who is my favorite exercise yt. FTM fitness has great pages as well, and I can show more info if needed.

[foolforharrry]

Strawberries & Memories - Chapter 5 - Knock Knock - Anna

Hi. This is the fifth chapter of my new book. I'm really excited about it and it would mean a lot if you shared it or gave me some feedback on it.

Summary for Strawberries & Memories: Anna went to the Coachella Music Festival to finally see her idol perform in person. Little did she know that would end up changing her life forever in ways she never even dared dream of. But everything comes at a cost.

Chapter Index

Chapter 4

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding with me.”, I groan in frustration, running a hand through my unruly hair.

Still have to brush it.

Sighing, I squat down so I can clean up the apple juice from the tiles that probably were white at some point. Now they’re cracked all over and have a yellowish tint to them.

You’d think that in the relatively long amount of time I would be using this bathroom in the days I’m here, that I would at some point get used to the smell. But it still has me scrunching my nose in discomfort every time I open the bathroom door.

I think the hotel should probably change the cleaning products they use. Because whatever it is, it’s like it got a renewal after yesterday. When I for once didn’t have the ‘Do not disturb' sign up.

Yesterday still feels like a fever dream. Like something that I just convinced myself happened after getting black-out drunk and waking up in different clothes than the ones I still remembered putting on the night before.

But that obviously isn’t the case. Because I do remember every single thing that happened yesterday.

From the second he sat down at the beach to when he dropped me off again here in the middle of the night. He’d asked if I was free again today. Which I really wasn’t since I was supposed to fly back to New York this afternoon. He said I should just push the flight to tomorrow. As if it was nothing.

Maybe it’s nothing to him. However, my broke ass can’t afford the flights that are scheduled for tomorrow.

I genuinely don’t understand how this man thinks, but he said he would fix it, no problem. And he wouldn’t take no for an answer.

So now I’ve promised him brownies and ice cream. Something he seemed very excited about.

Sadly, he’ll probably be disappointed.

I can’t bake at all. Morgan always does it. And she loves making a good brownie. Which is why that’s the idea that came to mind when I was trying to come up with something I could do for him.

Morgan was laughing for almost five minutes straight when I asked her for the recipe. She was near tears from laughter as she explained how to do it step by step, going slow enough so that I could write everything down in my notes app.

If I forgot to write down a step, I’m screwed.

I drag the travel-size hairbrush through my hair as fast as possible after spraying water in it in hopes it will tame the fizziness at least a little bit. Once all the tangles are out I split my hair down the middle before making one French braid on each side, leaving the front pieces out.

The stress already making me bounce around the room like a freaking crazy person and spill juice everywhere just increases when I catch a glimpse of the time on my phone screen when it flashes on with a notification from a text message.

It’s 12:56 right now. And Harry said he would come to pick me up at 1:00.

My palms are slippery and gross with sweat as I try to fold all my clothes and stuff them inside my suitcase. It’s anything but organised. Crumpled and messy and the opposite of how everything was when I came here.

But right now, I don’t really have time to care about that.

My laptop and everything else I’m going to need on the plane tomorrow go in my tote.

God, I suck at packing my shit.

My notes are the only thing I’m even remotely careful with packing. Every piece of paper I’ve scribbled on over the days, I fold and slide underneath my clothes.

They’re every unfiltered thought and idea I loved enough to write down. As of right now, they’re all unrelated and random. Most of them, I probably won’t ever use. But from experience, one of them might spark an idea or help patch plot holes in the future. My process is messy, but it works for me.

I’ll sort through them when I get back home.

I’ve done my best to look presentable today. But I hadn’t exactly planned on going over to Harry Styles’ house. Or be in LA for an extra day for that matter. So I didn’t really have much to work with.

A pair of black denim shorts, a white tank top and a mint green, knitted cardigan is what I ended up going for. It’s not my worst. But also far from my best.

Someone really needs to teach me fashion.

I’m in the process of trying my shoelaces when there is a sharp knock at the door that has me freezing in the middle of looping the shoelace around itself.

“Anna.”, I can hear him singsong through the thin door.

After a quick examination of the room, making a mental note to remember to zip up the suitcase that’s still open on the foot end of the bed, I get up and shuffle over to the door, taking a deep breath before twisting the lock and pulling it towards myself.

Pretty much the second there is room, Harry saunters into the room and plops down next to my suitcase as I close the door again behind him. Cheeky smile plastered on his face and everything.

“Knock knock.” He looks at me expectantly.

I suppress my smile, “Hi, H. Nice seeing you again. How are you doing?”

“Yeah, yeah. Greetings in all the languages. Knock knock.”

“You’re not gonna let this go, are you?”, I ask as I pick up my flip-flops from the floor, shuffling across the carpet. The carpet might be a bit more stained from my boots, but that’s not my problem anymore.

He shakes his head and I give in already knowing it’s going to be something stupid. “Who’s there?”

His dimples indent his cheeks as he smiles bashfully. “Nun.”

I tilt my head, confused about where on earth he is going with this. “Nun who?”

After a dramatic moment of silence, “It’s nun of your business.” Jazz hands.

It takes me a second to realise why he is so happy about this one. And why he sang it. Probably longer than it should’ve taken considering that I’ve heard it more times than I can count.

But when it clicks, I chuckle, shaking my head at him. “You’re fucking ridiculous. What that fuck?”

“That one was good.”, Harry says matter-of-factly. “You have to admit it was good. You even laughed.” And I can’t really argue with that.

I release the inside of my cheek from between my teeth. “It’s better than the ones you told me yesterday.”, I admit. The knock-knock jokes he told me in the car were actually horrendous. I don’t know where he comes up with them or why he thinks they’re funny.

Harry looks genuinely offended. With his hand held to his heart and his whole body leant away from me he puts on his best hurt voice, “Take that back. Right now.”

“Sorry mate.”, I raise my hands up by my shoulders. “No can do.”

Blowing harshly out through his nose, he shakes his head disappointedly. “That’s not very treat people with kindness of you, darling.” He points to my ‘Treat People With Kindness’ tote I left lying on the floor earlier.

I embroidered the slogan onto the bag myself almost a year ago. That is if you can call my amateur sewing embroidery. The bag itself is black while the letters switch between a pastel pink and a baby blue.

I could probably have made one that looks prettier now. Maybe I would’ve even been able to add in a little heart or something. But I’m attached to the stupid tote bag.

“Oh really?”, I say innocently. Disgustingly so. “I hadn’t noticed. Your joke was so fucking funny I forgot how to laugh.” To further my point, I fake a laugh into the palm of my hand.

Harry shakes his head at me, “Careful. Or I might not buy you smoothie like I was planning to.”

That has me straightening up instantly. “We were gonna get smoothies?”

“You told me you live for a strawberry smoothie, didn’t you?”

I nod, not even embarrassed by how big my smile is right now. I had completely forgotten that I told him that I love smoothies. But I did and he remembered well enough to plan on going to grab smoothie. Strawberry smoothie too.

“Wait.” I look at him sceptically. “Please don’t tell me you’re gonna buy that liquid grass.”

“Don’t look at me like that.”

I lower my eyes to my smoothie. My delicious strawberry smoothie that brings me genuine joy and happiness from how yummy it is. Away from the abomination of a drink he’s carrying in his free hand. “I’m not looking at you in any way.”

That’s a lie and he knows it.

“You have your preferences and I have mine.”, Harry defends himself. He takes another sip of his green juice.

I can’t see his eyes since they’re hidden behind a pair of black sunglasses. His hair is collected on the top of his head by a small clip. The black hoodie with the words ‘Pleasing’ written across his chest in white is a little big on him, but the hem of his t-shirt is still poking out over his green athletic shorts.

I actually really love the hoodie and I would blow my money on it. Even though I could probably have a closet for just hoodies already. But Harry straight up just refused to tell me where I could get my hands on one.

“Your preferences are scary, H. No normal person would willingly drink a juice with both apple and spinach.”

“Good thing I’m not normal.”, Harry counters.

I don’t see him transferring his juice to his other hand until he snatches the smoothie from my hands and has taken off running away from me. His laughter makes the people he runs past turn their heads to see where it comes from.

It takes me a second to react and run after him, “Come back here!”

He isn’t running that fast, but my thighs still burn a little while trying to catch up to him. I don’t register the faces twisting in my direction, my focus directed to seeing where he runs off with my precious smoothie and not falling on my face.

Finally, he slows down when we’re approaching his car parked by the side of the road. I can tell that he’s still laughing from the small distance. His hands on his knees to help him catch his breath after setting the cups on top of his car.

I do the same when I’m caught up, wheezing oxygen into my lungs. “You’re gonna kill me.”

Harry only laughs harder at the accusation when I sink to the ground as slowly as possible. When my knees are bent just past 90 degrees, I give up on slow and just let my ass plant to the pavement.

“You good?”, Harry asks. His voice breaks when he giggles again.

I roll my eyes, wiping my forehead with the back of my hand. “If you can hand me my smoothie and stop killing me then I’ll be just cracking.”

“Cracking, huh?” Harry sits down next to me after giving me back my smoothie. Miraculously, nothing was spilt.

I hum contently, letting the cold drink slide down my throat and soothe the thirst that’s built up from running.

I don’t run enough.

“Yeah, H. Cracking.”

He tilts his head to the side confusedly, “I’ve never heard an American use cracking seriously before. Thought that was a British thing.”

A nervous chuckle makes its way out of me while I can feel blush spread across my cheeks. “It is a British thing. I looked it up.”

Harry looks at me as if I’ve suddenly grown an additional head. “You looked it up? Why?”

“Hanging out with someone who is British, AKA you.” I nod my head towards him. “I wanted to be prepared for you making no sense.”

Harry takes a deep breath, drinking more of his nasty juice. “What do you mean making no sense? I always make sense.”

“Mhm.”, I hum. “Keep telling yourself that.”

I’ve decided the beach might be my favourite place again. Maybe even more than it was yesterday.

Salt wind. Soft, warm sand between my toes. The sun that makes me look more alive than dead for once in my pale life. My lifeless skin soaking up some of the very much needed vitamin D the sunshine offers so my skeleton can remain semi-healthy. Gorgeous, gorgeous blue water. The sound of the waves washing over the shore the kind that could lull you to sleep effortlessly.

It was my number one place in the whole world for one whole, uninterrupted hour. When it was just Harry and I talking with soft music playing from the small speaker he brought and munching on the fruits and berries he packed us.

Until I got a handful of wet sand chucked at the back of my head.

I shriek in shock, my spine straightening instantly as my hands fly up to protect my face. Twisting my body 180 degrees on reflex.

I spot the guilty party instantly.

Harry is hunched over laughing just a few feet away from me. His mouth is covered by his clean hand while the dirty, sandy one is pointed at me.

“You’re gonna regret that.” I shoot to my feet, collecting sand in each fist on my way up before I take off charging towards him. The towels are probably covered in sand now.

Harry’s smile falls, a mumbled “Shit.”, before he scrambles to get some sand of his own to defend himself with.

He dodges the first sand ball I throw at him, but the second one hits him square in the face.

“Oops.”, I cover my mouth to hold back a cackle while he literally turns his head to the side to spit sand. Lucky for him, the sand was dry. So it falls off his face pretty much on its own, dropping to his chest where it sticks to the sunscreen he just applied. The amount of sand robs his skin of the golden glow the sunshine gave him before.

Standing still and watching him get it all away from his eyes might have been the stupidest thing ever. Because the look on his face when he has his eyesight back has me backing away slowly with my arms protectively in front of me. “We can talk about this, H. No need to make any rash, murderous decisions.”

It’s when he shakes his head, tucking his bottom lip under his teeth I realise I’m fucked.

Harry follows my stressed, uncoordinated steps with steady, calculated ones while sizing me up and down. He’s probably trying to figure out where he wants to hide my body.

Out of nowhere, he charges.

His bare feet send the sand flying behind him and he gives me no time to react or turn around to run. The already close proximity only gives him an advantage as he simply crouches when he’s close enough.

Before I even know what’s happening, he’s got me thrown over his shoulder. I shriek as my legs dangle off his shoulder, gripping onto him for dear life.

The way he managed to do that so easily is honestly kind of offensive.

“What the fuck? Let go of me.”, I cry out, feeling my body sway with every single step he takes.

Harry giggles, giving my knee a small squeeze. “You sure about that, Anna?”

I’m about to say yes because right now there is nothing I want more than for him to let me down onto the ground again and kiss the fucking earth for being there.

Heights aren’t really my thing.

The word was right on my tongue until I realise how much closer the waves sound now and it has my eyes flying open and my head twisting over my shoulder to see that yes, he is doing what I think he is. “No no no. Harry. Don’t you fucking dare.”

“Really? I thought you wanted me to let you down.”, he teases as the water engulfs his feet without even flinching.

He isn’t human. That water is probably freezing.

I can feel the goosebumps spreading like wildfire across my body when he’s waist-deep and the water hits my hands and feet. “Fuck me that’s cold.”, I hiss, freezing completely.

I feel him pat the back of my thigh before I hear him. “You ready?”

“No!”

“Fantastic!” He ignores my protests, walking further into the ocean.

“Harry, I swear to fucking God.”

“On a count of three?”

“We can talk about this.” I know I’ve lost here.

“3.”

“My lord and saviour, Zayn Malik, please save me from eternal damnation-”

Freezing, fucking cold. That’s what the water is. Fully emerged and in darkness, the water shocks my body despite already being aware of the temperature. Harry flipped me over his shoulder again. My head was the first to go under barely giving me time to stop my quick prayer and breathe in.

It takes me a second to figure out what’s up and down, but the second I do, I’m planting my feet in the soft sand so I can stand up straight. Coughing and wiping the salt water out of my eyes and my hair out of my when my head is out of the water.

“You ok?”, Harry asks through a choked laugh, running a hand through his now soaked hair.

“Mhm.”, I hum tensely, doing my best to ignore the way my body is shaking from the cold so my scowl is more believable.

Harry lets himself sink until everything but his head is submerged. What he didn’t consider, was the fact that we’re in a literal ocean, a wave catching him off guard as it washes over his whole head so he’s completely underwater.

I’m holding my stomach laughing as he coughs from the unexpected water the same way I did, a pout turning his pink lips downwards when he’s done. “I guess I deserved that.”

“Yeah, you did.”

-

Masterlist

[indigo474]

December 2nd 2023

I was a bit emotional today. I went on face book and saw Michaels wife posted a photo and i am reminded of everything ive lost. it hurts. what can i do but let it hurt. it brings up so many emotions in me.. my kids will never know how much i had to fight for them. and thats ok. i think of Madison and the pain she carries. she lost a lot too... why?? i do think X is evil- to do what he has done not only to me but to Madison- she had nothing to offer him- no trust fund and how dare she cost him money.. so so sick.. but then.. they are adults so shame on them for not speaking to their sister. shame of meghan-- someday someday-- the truth- i don't know when, or how.. and i don't know how 1 man ..... i ran almost 5 miles today. I'm going to need a bigger park. I'm doing the 10 k program so it wasn't all at one but it was challenging.. running is mental. i noticed when i start to feel uncomfortable while running i'm able to tell myself that its ok because ive felt uncomfortable before and it will pass. i ruined my run on thursday because my music app wouldnt work.. i kept trying and trying to get it to work- stopping and starting and i got so mad myself -- it's not working why do you keep trying? i had it in my head i couldnt run without music. Friday i ran without music. today i had music until the last 10 minutes.. i'm excited to see how far i can run. i'm still not sure i am a runner.. i'm not built like one. BUT i like it. I lifted today. 170 dead lift- it felt heavy.. ohh an this week my back has been hurting me.. i'm pretty sure i am getting my period or due to get it and thats why 1 emotions and 2 my back hurts??? it was stiff all week.. sitting at a desk all day make my body sore.. i still lifted heavy although i told james on tues my back hurt so i didnt life as heavy.. today i went in tired from my run which i probably shouldnt be doing.. i guess i could have waited to run afterwards? i have no idea what i should or shouldnt be doing.. i think james said ideally i shouldnt be doing both on the same day.. benched 100-- i get it- i lose it.. split squats almost killed me today- he upped the weight. i played with Kika.. james did a chrome delete on his tesla and his dad was not happy about it- i think its his dads car.. i think it looks good but he needs to get new wheels.. i'm getting use to my commute- i knew i would. i was merging when i should have been yielding- i'm glad i figured that out.. work is kind of horrible. i know one of my reps is going to be in for a rude awakening soon.. its heating season so things are a bit crazy- i was a little bitchy on friday with 2 of my reps.. the one coming to my desk for me to help her after i told her i was busy.. the other is ghetto and i had enough..everyone is so use to me being me- happy helpful positive- they could tell i wasnt in the mood on friday.. it is what it is.. i'm human too.. i had a meeting with both reps separately.. I wore myself out today. Ive been thinking about turning 50- i hate to say this but i'm slightly scared.. a little bit. my mom told me menopause hit her at 50. she went on to tell me how horrible it was.. so i guess i have that in the back of my mind. i feel like i was starting to have symptoms but they have mostly gone away. i want to be and feel excited about aging- it's a privilege and i cant stop it- it's when i hear people say negative things about it- the good news it I am not my Mom.. My house is decorated. it looks good. I wish i had another Christmas tree to decorate.. Madison says 3 is too many.. i'm not convinced. ive had a pretty incredible year.. i don't know how 2024 can top it.....

Madison is going to be working 3rd shift- she is happy.. i'm not that thrilled for her to be out in the middle of the night.

James says i should join the dating apps again.. its the only way to meet someone.. I do want to meet someone- i just do not want to join any dating app..... not now anyway. I am enjoying being single- i thought to myself today that i should enjoy it because i wont always be single. I won't always be single. he's out there..

[stayjoy]

How To Stay Motivated To Lose Weight | Staying on Track Of Weight Loss Journey

Don't lose your motivation to grab a healthy physique, you should need to stay motivated to lose weight. Your willpower is everything that helps to stay on track. Losing weight takes time and consistent effort, and most people lose motivation when they don't see quick results, whether in their business or in their fitness. And stop putting in their efforts. So it is very important to stay motivated to reach your goals. Some people use fitness apps to track their fitness progress but do not stick with them for a long time. You should understand that this is not a game of a few days or weeks; you need to be totally focused on your diet plans and workout routines for a longer time. The body takes time to adapt to the changes. Follow these simple and professional steps to stay motivated.

Celebrate Treat Day - To Stay Motivated Toward Your Goals

How To Stay Motivated To Lose Weight We know that sometimes it becomes very difficult to be strict with diet and exercise. That is why some professionals emerge on a "cheat day". Here, we will call it a rewarding or treat day. Cheat day sounds a little bit weird. Always take a break from your diet and exercise every week. And eat what you like or do what you can, but keep in mind that the next day you need to go back to your restricted routine. So eat in limited quantities. Rewarding activities give a boost to your mood, confidence, and energy.

Don't Choose Unrealistic Goals: To Stay Motivated, Lose Weight

How To Stay Motivated To Lose Weight I will get six packs in 10 days, I will get a slim belly within a week, and I will lose 10 pounds in 4 days. These are some of the unrealistic goals that lower your motivation to focus on your goals. The main reason for losing motivation is that you set a very unrealistic goal for yourself. So get back into the real world. You will surely get the results that you want. One condition is that you need to be strict and make small goals, like today, I will do 20 sit-ups, 20 squats, 20 push-ups, and so on. And try to increase the number of exercises and the number of days you can do them.

Make a Journal - Stay Motivated To Lose Weight

How To Stay Motivated To Lose Weight Yes, of course. Why not? A journal helps you stay on track. We know maintaining a journal is difficult in the initial days, but it becomes very easy after 1 or 2 weeks. Note down everything related to your fitness journey. Like which workout you have done today and what food you have eaten today. Writing things down clarifies your goals and helps you plan better according to your needs. Because not every plan works for everyone. You are a born fighter, and you have a fighting spirit. A journal helps you fight your weaknesses and make you better. Take advantage of popular fitness apps to stay on track.

Consistency Is The Key To Success - Stay Motivated To Lose Weight

If your goal is weight loss, then don't count your weight every day or check your belly size every day. The best thing you need to check is your journal. The right things only work for those who improve themselves every day. You need to make your willpower strong and think about why you want to be fit. Always remember your true goals and keep them in mind.

Make Small Goals & Have Realistic Expectations

Yes, try to split the goals into little chunks. Let's say your goal is to lose 10 pounds in a month; your focus should be to lose 1-2 pounds per week, not 10 pounds in a month. And analyze what changes you can make to reach it. Calculate everything, like how many calories you should need and how many calories you need to burn. When you split your big goal into small chunks, you see a clear path to reaching your goals.

Create an Unrealistic Fear - To Stay on Track

Sometimes a little fear does wonderful magic as you do with your children to teach them good lessons. Here, no one is your boss, and no one is forcing you to do anything; here, you are only your boss, and you need to be strict about your fitness goals. That's why you need to create an unrealistic fear in your mind to become a fit person. You can say to yourself that if you don't work out today, you will lose some money from your bank. Ha Ha looks funny, but you need to create some kind of fear in your mind to stay on track. Final Thoughts Be realistic and always stay on the fitness track. To achieve any goal, whether it's about fitness, career, education, money, or anything else, the one thing that matters is strong willpower to bring about the changes. You need to make your willpower strong enough to fight against any barrier that prevents you from achieving your goals. FAQs Why is it so hard to stay motivated to lose weight?Fatigue, high-stress levels, and not seeing quick results are also causes of a lack of motivation. You need to feel internally good to stay on track.How can a lazy and unmotivated person lose weight?First, make healthy diet changes and bring the energy to work out regularly.How do I get the willpower to lose weight?You need to clarify your goals and why you want to lose extra pounds. That helps you stay motivated and committed.How do you stay committed to losing weight?Focus on realistic goals and split big goals into small tasks. Achieving small tasks helps you stay committed to losing weight.How do I get motivated to lose weight and get back on track?Simply clear your thoughts about why you want to lose weight and what benefits you will get after losing weight. It helps you stay motivated and get back on track.How can I lose 10 pounds in a month?You need to lose 1 to 2 pounds per week. Stay committed to a calorie-deficit diet and burn maximum calories by doing regular workouts. Read the full article

[kithtaehyung]

Last November (M)

title: last november (m) post date: december 14th, 2020, 8pm est  ⤷ revamped/extended: march 27th, 2021, 10pm est pairing: seokjin x reader(f) genre: angst, smut, exes to lovers au summary: you two broke up on good terms. even seeing each other on your friends’ yearly end-of-november trip was never awkward. so why did this trip feel so different? and why does it feel like the end of something that wasn’t even there in the first place? warnings: angst, bad puns and jokes, mutual pining, light dom/sub undertones, oral sex (m/f receiving), nipple play, hair-pulling, choking, rough sex, unprotected sex (pls be responsible!), dirty talk, spanking, creampie, seokjin is a consent king, did i say angst?, did i also say bad puns and jokes? mobile users: alt link if this doesn’t open in tumblr ➛ AO3 word count: 23.7k 24.7k !!

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On the last Friday of every November, your group of friends piled into two cars and set off into the mountains. 

Ever since you all graduated from high school years ago, everyone branched off into their individual, intricate walks of life. Different towns, different jobs, different social circles. 

But before those grand adventures started, each of you promised one thing: a yearly trip to keep the friendship alive.

This time around, you happened to be in the “decidedly more fun” car as Jimin, Taehyung, and your longtime friend Rin jammed the backseat with singing and road trip games. Since Seokjin took driver, you claimed navigator, leaving the front of the vehicle a bit muted compared to the other half. Which was fine - you always loved relaxing on the sidelines while your friends played with chaos and hilarity. 

Namjoon kept you company from time to time, too, so you weren’t completely alone in your preferred space.  

The only thing that could’ve made the ride awkward was if you and Seokjin were on bad terms. 

It wasn’t every day you found yourself sitting beside your ex, after all. 

But that simple fact didn’t phase you. The truth was that your breakup was clean and painless - a massive relief to your friends. Back then, it would have torn everyone to pieces picking sides. 

The split was so organic that you couldn’t recall an awful reason why it happened. Separation proved as natural as the changing of seasons: you had moved away for university and he powered through his own medical pursuits. Over time, the relationship simmered to a text every few days, resulting in the night in which you decided that it was better to remain friends.

What sucked was the fact that, over the course of time after the breakup, you fell for Seokjin. Annoying, charming, incredible Seokjin. 

You didn’t come to terms with it until last November, when you watched his eyes sparkle under an indigo ocean of stars and it just clicked. Agony carved into your heart some nights when you thought about nothing else, but you couldn’t admit your feelings. Not when you two decided that your river had run its course. You couldn’t risk smothering the last embers of your relationship, so radio silence remained your lonely swan song. 

Of course you wanted to admit it. You wanted to tell him. Because no matter who came after, they all fell short. Every smile flashed your way, every pair of arms wrapped around your torso, every night spent between the sheets. Nothing compared to what you got from Jin. That man created a hole in your heart that lingered in his wake, a hole through which all of your subsequent relationships plummeted. 

The truth was simple: you didn’t want to ruin what you had. Even if what you two would always be was just friends, that endgame was enough for you.

At least, that’s what you told yourself. Every night when you couldn’t sleep, and every morning when you woke up to an empty bed.

Your vision snapped into focus as your phone screen bloomed. The maps app signaled for a turn, so you relayed the direction to Seokjin, who repeated the direction out loud before following through.

Just like always.

The road in front of you melted into a different scene entirely as you recalled why he started that habit. It sprouted from one of your car rides to a diner situated on the other side of your hometown. 

During the drive, you did your best as navigator, but your boyfriend was so into the music playing that he missed some turns. One errant right later had you both terribly lost, the surrounding area swallowing the car in darkness. On instinct, you dove into defense mode, trying and failing not to outright panic.

“My maps won’t load,” you stuttered, hitting the screen with your finger, “Shit, shit, shit.”

“Don’t worry, I can just—”

“Don’t tell me not to worry,” you bit out. “Let’s just get out of here.” You hated how pure paranoia pricked at the corners of your eyes. Getting lost was completely irksome and going back home was more appealing to you than moving forward with the date. 

“Okay. I won’t,” Seokjin assured you, turning the wheel and rolling the car out from the shadowy street. “How can I help instead?”

“Oh, umm.” With grateful eyes, you stared at your boyfriend and admired his consideration. You’ve never been asked that while upset before. “You could, uh, repeat the directions before following them? That might help.” 

His lips curved into a smile, and streetlights flooded the car to bathe his sincerity in a warm glow. “Repeat directions, you got it.”

The memory faded as you blinked and observed the endless mountain range enveloping the road. Snow topped the summits in white caps; coniferous trees swallowed the steep slopes. As if reminiscence clogged your ears, the music in the car seemed louder outside your broken reverie. 

Taehyung, as always, took charge of the aux. He usually had an eclectic mix of tunes on rotation but, that time, nothing but upbeat Christmas music was queued. You had to admit: merry music coating the car windows and mountainous scenery claiming your entire vision put you in the best mood. 

It was even better when Seokjin sang along. You really did like his singing voice. 

“I like my singing voice, too.” 

Your eyes snapped toward the driver, expression freezing over as you drank in his delight. Did you really say that out loud? You knew Seokjin enough to know that he was never going to let that go. 

“Yeah, well…” You lazily swatted his grin away. “Don’t flatter yourself.” 

Seokjin chuckled, his hands comfortably resting on the wheel. “Are you offering to do that for me? It’s minimum wage, but I’d hire you.”

Rolling your eyes felt like the only appropriate response, so you did exactly that, your exasperated gaze looping around to land on your phone. “Relish this moment, Seokjin,” you advised, zooming out in the maps app to make sure you were still heading in the right direction, “Because it won’t happen again. And take the next exit. We’re almost there.” 

“Yes, yes, next exit.” You missed the smirk on his face as he scanned the roadside for the telltale sign. “Moment relished,” he quipped, “But I prefer my moments with ketchup and mustard.” 

Your groan drowned in his boisterous laughter, but the hand on your face betrayed you since it couldn’t quite cover up the glee that formed right after. 

An hour later, everyone had unloaded the vehicles at the campgrounds and pitched the tents. While Hoseok and Jungkook worked on starting the fire pit, Namjoon and Jimin took their time organizing the food and snacks. Rin had disappeared with Taehyung somewhere, but Yoongi said he spotted them taking pictures a ways off. 

“They should be helping,” he muttered. “There’s a lot to do before it gets dark out.” 

Squatting down to rotate sizzling meat on your portable grill, you waved him off. “They’re shot-swapping since it’s golden hour.” 

The silence that followed gave you pause. When you looked up in curiosity, Seokjin and Yoongi regarded you like a foreign language coated your tongue, their struggle to decipher it earning a chuckle of pity. 

“They’re both huge influencers, so they know how to take pictures. They always do this when we get together,” you explained, spinning the kebab onto another side, “And golden hour is around sunrise and sunset. It looks like everything is soaked in gold, and it makes your pictures look pretty. But that’s an old term already! You geezers should keep up.” 

Yoongi simply raised an eyebrow and kneeled to turn his designated stick. Smoke from the charred meat wafted into your noses as he declined, “I’ll pass. That sounds stressful.” 

A rapid clapping of tongs next to your ear preceded Seokjin’s offer, “What are we waiting for? Let’s golden hour swap!” 

Why did he have to be so endearing? A cough escaped your throat, disjointed laughs following right after in their awkward escape. Beside you, Yoongi flung condescension Jin’s way, his voice stocked with disappointment as he warned, “Don’t speak. You age yourself.” 

You transferred your kebabs to a foiled plate before standing, blood rushing to your lower legs. Seokjin was unleashing a hearty tirade at the other man grilling when you intervened, “That sounds nice, actually. I’m in a photography class so I was planning on taking some photos anyways. Lemme just get my camera.” 

As you walked away, you couldn’t escape the abrupt change in atmosphere hovering over the grills, its looming tension caressing the back of your coat in a slight push. The words exchanged were soft in volume, but their possible meanings stayed clanging in your ears. 

“Did you tell her yet?” 

“No.” 

“Do it. She deserves to know.” 

You slipped out of your tent with a heavy jacket and lightheadedness. Medicine would’ve helped with the latter, but the med kit Seokjin packed remained strictly for emergencies. Besides, you couldn’t quite slap a bandage on what was truly bothering you anyways. 

As you inspected your class-registered Polaroid, you continued to wonder what Yoongi meant earlier. 

What was he implying? You deserved to know what? You couldn’t say the feeling swirling around your gut was a positive one. After all, there was a distinct difference in what a person should know, and what a person deserved to know. What was so important that Yoongi practically ordered Seokjin to spill? 

Was there another person in his life now? That was one thing that crossed your mind, but you filed that under the “should know” category, even though it twisted your stomach to think about.

The news had to be something urgent. 

Was Seokjin getting married? 

Without your permission, vessels in your heart shriveled, squeezing life from your already battered soul. A betrothal was entirely possible with his pursuit of a medical degree and coming from a well-to-do family. Maybe he was in an arrangement? 

That possibility dropped an anvil on your chest. You couldn’t say that you were completely fine were that the truth. How could you be fine with something like that if you loved him? Of course, you would be happy if he was, but your heart would require recuperation for an extended amount of time. Give or take a few years. 

You wandered so far into the depths of your mind that Seokjin’s sudden appearance kicked you back to shore, a yelp leaving your mouth at the same time your Polaroid left your hands. If the camera wasn’t hanging from your neck, you would’ve been in deep shit with your professor as soon as it hit the cold soil. 

Its bulky frame definitely bruised your lower chest on the downswing, though. “Ow. Geez, Jinnie, you can’t just sneak up on people like that.” 

Your eyes widened in realization. Jinnie? Shit, you hadn’t called him that since you guys were dating. Quite obviously, the stockpile of thoughts and worries involving his secret were blocking your brain from better judgment. 

And apparently you weren’t the only one affected by that nickname because Seokjin’s eyebrows shot into his dark locks, his peculiar glance shifting away. Odd. 

After an awkward second, he cleared his throat. “Does it hurt?” 

Is it supposed to? You knew he was inquiring about your injury but your thoughts drifted to what hadn’t been divulged yet. “No, it’s fine,” you lied. “Let’s pick a spot before we lose the light.” 

You don’t remember how long you walked, but the pair of you ended up far from the original campsite. 

In your defense, it wasn’t like you planned that outcome. The trees matched at every turn, so you kept wandering until you found a good clearing - or at least some rocks to break the forested monotony. 

A foil to your pickiness, Seokjin voiced his thoughts every ten paces, his votes of confidence constantly crushed by your boots. If you had a cent for every time he declared a spot “the one,” you could actually afford the Polaroid dangling from your neck. 

It was at a calm clearing with some patches from last snowfall where you decided to settle. 

Unhooking the strap from your neck, you ushered, “Let’s do this quick. It’s almost over.” 

“I wanna do it first!” You thought Seokjin meant to take the camera from you, but instead he scuttled into the clearing, striking a pose once he reached its center. Of course the fool meant that he wanted his pictures taken and not the other way around. How was any other idea plausible? “Hurry up, you said!” 

“The ‘S’ in Seokjin stands for ‘Selfish,’” you yelled, positioning the Polaroid against your eye regardless. His face enlarged in the lens and, to his credit, you couldn’t argue that he was the clear model between you two. The man could pursue a career in fashion instead of medicine and you wouldn’t bat an eye. 

He looked handsome merely standing there, cheeks dimpling at nothing in particular and his charm ever effortless. Even the slight bags under his eyes didn’t take away from his natural beauty. 

Par for the course with Seokjin. That unbothered self-assurance was one of the traits you liked and hated about him. 

At least, initially. The more you got to know him, your outlook on that defining characteristic was one of admiration, not hatred. You simply needed to start shoving some of that confidence down your own throat like a different type of vitamin C.

After a telltale camera snap, the man threw out his coated arms in another pose. “And the ‘Seok’ stands for ‘Seok in my presence!’” 

“I think I’ve been in it long enough. My fingers are pruny,” you droned while lowering your Polaroid, ignoring his wiggling in the background. It seemed you were still accustomed to his ridiculousness. 

Yet another thing you gave him credit for: he was never afraid to be a dork. When you first met him, you admittedly thought he was faking it. Over time, you recognized his authenticity, and you grew fond of everything wrapped in the gift that was Kim Seokjin.

You waited for the picture to materialize in your hand. When your impatient model approached you and asked why you weren’t shaking the polaroid, you informed him that you should, in fact, not do that. “It’ll damage the final product!” 

“So that song is…” 

“Wrong. Yes.” 

Pure shock flashed across his face. “What other lies have I been told?”  

The captured memory started blossoming, and you watched as the color bled into life. “That you aren’t the funniest person on the planet,” you answered, earning a scoff. 

“In that case, you’ve just been misinformed.” Seokjin huffed before offering an outstretched palm. “Now hand over the camera, it’s your turn.”

“Me?” You didn’t think he was serious when he said swap. In reality, you just assumed he whipped up an excuse for you to take pictures of him. 

And you didn’t mind. It was nice to have that charming smile directed at you, even if only through the lens of a camera. The Polaroid would be your shield, blocking Seokjin from the pain swimming in your eyes, barely afloat in pools of regret and guilt and loneliness.

“Yes, woman! When was the last time you had your picture taken?” 

Slowly, embarrassment swelled across your cheeks when you realized it had been a very long time. Legitimately long. You never asked others to take your picture; rather, you were always the one behind the lens. The last time someone actually offered was… 

“When you took one,” you stuttered out breathily, “At that park.” 

It was during one of the last dates you two went on before you left for university. There was a carnival you were dying to visit, and Seokjin surprised you with tickets and a kiss. 

You remember being so elated while traversing through the whimsical booths, failing fantastically at the rigged games, scarfing down sticky, billowy cotton candy. Squeaky horns and childish laughter filled your ears, and you could still feel Jin’s gentle fingers on your hand as he shyly tugged you under glowing stringed lights. 

The main attraction was a carousel keeping everything else in orbit, its charisma shining like a golden, spinning sun. When night fell, you too gravitated toward its charm, standing behind its barricade to watch horses and teacups endlessly turn. 

It was so captivating that you forgot yourself and where you were - who you were supposed to be spending time with. Swiveling in fear, you scanned the bustling crowd for your boyfriend, realizing that you needn’t worry at all. 

Seokjin simply waited behind you, holding up his phone and telling you to pose. You were so caught off-guard in that moment that your face contorted hilariously right as he snapped the photo. In his eyes, it was the greatest picture of all time. 

However, it wasn’t that well received by its subject. You begged Seokjin to delete it, and he finally caved on the grounds that you took a replacement. Conceding, you stomped back to the gate guarding the twirling attraction and pranked your boyfriend with a blank expression. 

But as soon as Seokjin drawled “You look like you don’t care-ousel,” you burst into laughter - your unabashed mirth becoming his background on every device he owned. 

The scene faded from your eyes as the current Seokjin stood in front of you, gripping the Polaroid instead of his phone. Gone were the lights and sounds of the theme park and, with them, your fleeting moment of solace. 

“Oh,” was all he stated in return, and you swore the temperature chose to drop in that moment just to mock you.

“You know I don’t prefer it anyways.” Your heart was losing its grip, sorrow evident in your shaky tone. You folded your arms to shield your body from the weather and unwanted emotions. “I’m definitely not as photogenic as you.” 

“Nonsense,” Seokjin shot back. “Now hurry up, it’s only golden minute now!” 

And just like that, his warmth melted any awkwardness like spring chasing away winter. 

In retrospect, he probably regarded that moment at the carnival differently, or he just wanted to keep those memories in the past where they belonged. It hurt to be the only one so strongly affected by them, but Jin had the right idea. If there existed a standard list of activities to do with an ex, talking about the past wasn’t one of the options. Especially if you had feelings for said ex. 

Plus, you didn’t forget that there was something he had to tell you. It seemed like you were going to have to wait a little longer for that, and your anxiousness wasn’t pleased.  

As you ambled to the center of the clearing, you focused more on the crunching sounds your boots made rather than your feelings. With a quick survey of the area, you surmised that it really was a pretty spot, the mountain range peeking behind the trees adding depth to the setting. Adjusting your outfit, you took a breath of courage before staring at the eye of the Polaroid.

Seokjin moved the camera from his face and called your name, roping your gaze to his concern. “Smile, okay?” 

On instinct, your throat constricted. You couldn’t hide behind the lens that time. But smile you did, and you hoped Seokjin thought it genuine, silently pleading him to not notice the anguish lingering behind your crescent eyes. 

The fire pit your friends constructed blazed bright as you both made it back to the campgrounds. Everyone occupied the surrounding logs and, judging from the soft pop pumping from a portable speaker, Jungkook must have commandeered music control.

Jimin turned when he heard your footsteps, his expression indiscernible as he shifted his gaze between you and Jin. Thankfully, he didn’t say anything, only turning back to Yoongi to continue their conversation. 

Seokjin and you parted ways effortlessly: he slotted into the empty space next to Namjoon and you headed to your tent to stow your camera. 

And for some reason, that easy departure was hard to swallow. 

Your pitched space offered warmth upon entry, and you dumped yourself onto your sleeping bag without a word. A few quiet moments passed before you unzipped your backpack, the tiny action feeling so tedious, so difficult to achieve. 

After you finally stored your equipment and closed your bag shut, you just… sat there. Contemplative. 

Mentally, you were in a bad place. Your thoughts and emotions banged into each other, their war rendering you powerless - captive. Fidgeting with the plasticky fabric of your sleeping bag, you thought back to what happened after you two left the photo spot.

It was an uneventful walk back for the most part. The polaroids turned out nice, all thanks to the very rare and very expensive camera you borrowed. Seokjin claimed yours and handed you his, and faced with your sudden curiosity, he sheepishly offered, “You don’t have to keep it.” 

You were more questioning of the fact that he stored yours in his jacket, but you didn’t want to broach that subject. It was beginning to scare you. Maybe it was the fact that he was acting strange, coupled with the other fact that he was hiding something from you. 

Why were you suddenly afraid to confront him? You two were open with each other during your relationship. Were you also wanting to put this dreaded conversation off as long as possible, too? 

If he was with someone else, though, would he still be keeping your picture? 

It was too much to think about, so you tried to lock everything in a box and sit on it. 

You saw the light of the campfire after a few minutes of walking through the woods - a handful of silent, crawling minutes. It was bugging you that Seokjin didn’t say anything on the way back. A quiet Jin was a Jin knee deep in thought, and not in good circumstance. In a moment of weakness, you almost offered out your hand to grab his, but you instead crammed it inside your coat pocket. 

When you both rejoined your friends, it seemed so easy for you guys to separate, like you didn’t just go off and do something so intimate. Even though that wasn’t the word you wanted to use. 

You resigned yourself to the big picture nonetheless: it wasn’t like what Taehyung and Rin did. Your best friend was insanely popular on social media with her carefully curated feed and relatable-yet-unachievable style. Taehyung had his own massive following for different reasons, and you couldn’t deny that he knew exactly what he was doing to gain the hearts of many. They were snapping photos for each other to show millions of anonymous beings across the world. 

You and Seokjin just took photos for each other to have. No one else was going to see those. 

Why did you feel like that was significant? 

The edge of your sleeping bag began to fray under duress, so you plucked your body off the ground and slipped back outside. What you expected was the temperature dipping a couple degrees in nightfall. What you didn’t expect was Jimin waiting for you, puffy jacket and all, leaning against a tree. 

When he saw you emerge from your tent, he straightened and regarded you with caution. “Everything okay?”

You adjusted the front of your coat before fishing a beanie out to cover your ears. “Yeah, why?”

“You were just in there for awhile,” Jimin explained, his eyes searching yours, “And you were with him for a long time.”

“I don’t like being interrogated, Park,” you sighed.

“I know, I just…” He mirrored you and huffed his own breath toward the ground. A quick glance had you noticing that his own beanie was knit as thick as the fog in your mind. “I just want to make sure.” 

Jimin was whom you considered closest next to your best friend and formerly Seokjin. After your break up, Jimin regularly sent you texts to check on you, despite your constant assurance that you were okay. It got to a point where you phoned him and pleaded reprieve - to reach out only if he had something critical to say. 

His broken reply? He only texted you because Seokjin wouldn’t. 

You ended up crying after that call, and the tears annoyingly persisted a couple nights following. 

He was also one of the only two people in the world that knew you loved Jin. Rin was the other, and that’s only because you let it slip during a girls’ night over cheap wine and period piece movies. Something about an early morning confession in a dewy meadow was enough to loosen your alcohol-mottled tongue.

After you ran your fingers over your head, you responded, “Can I ask you something?” 

Your friend’s eyes roamed over your face. “Of course.”

“What’s he hiding from me?”

Jimin instantly clammed up at the question. His dancer frame assumed a rigid position, each limb locking, including his jaw. “It’s not my place to say,” he answered gravely, pulling anger from your center.

“Does everyone else know this secret except me?” You really couldn’t take it anymore, especially knowing that something you supposedly deserved to know was possibly public knowledge. 

“Just the guys,” Jimin divulged, and you scoffed. 

“I can’t believe this.” You made to walk away, in the opposite direction of the campfire. Into the woods again.

Jimin said your name like he just wanted you to understand already, halting you mid-stride. “I’ve been trying to get him to talk to you. Trust me, I have.”

“He’s a grown man, Park. His decisions aren’t your problem,” you whispered. 

“But aren’t they yours?” 

“Not anymore. We aren’t together right now, if you don’t recall.” You knew you were spitting bullshit, and Jimin did, too. If Seokjin wasn’t giving you problems, you wouldn’t have been hiding in your tent or literally and figuratively walking away from him. Guiltily, you turned back to face Jimin and give him his credit. 

He was this way for everyone in your group: the glue that hung on and fought to keep people from breaking apart. Whenever a fight broke out between warring parties, Jimin was the middle man. Always. 

Sighing, you relented, “I’m sorry I’m taking this out on you. I’m just so confused, and the longer he hides whatever he’s hiding from me, the more restless I’ll be.”

“Everyone is on your side in this,” Jimin replied. “He just needs to, I don’t know, woman up.”

A breath of laughter escaped you at the tweaked phrase, the tension coating your shoulders slowly sliding off in clumps. “Did you say ‘woman up?’”

“Men aren’t shit,” your friend explained, pointing a gloved finger to punctuate every syllable. “At least women get things done.”

“I would totally drink to that if I had a bottle in my hand, Jimin.”

“Ah, well that can be arranged!” The boy’s eyes crinkled as he spun on a heel. “Let’s go. Jungkook and Taehyung brought out the drinks awhile ago. I missed out on a few bottles already talking to you.”

“Oh, I feel so remorseful,” you cooed, your voice worthy of giving kids cavities. “Almost as if I cared.” 

“Ass,” Jimin snapped, but he could only laugh. When you joined his side, he turned and whispered, “But seriously. If he doesn’t talk about it by the end of this trip, I’m giving him hell.” 

The temperature dropped again at that moment, and the wind blowing through the pines cut straight into your bones. Your shoulders hunched on instinct and you blinked to get needed moisture. Was it going to snow? The skies above did look intimidating. Was it going to storm? 

A sudden trepidation settled into your gut. “Did we check the weather,” you queried, shuffling through your brain to see if you monitored it yourself before the trip. 

“Uh-umm, I did,” Jimin answered through chattering teeth, “But I didn’t see anything other than it being cold.” 

You pulled out your phone and regretted doing so, your fingers freezing over instantly. You were lucky you all chose a location that was still in signal range - really, thanks went to Rin and Taehyung for incessantly demanding it every year.

Pulling up the weather app after a few tries, you cursed at the oncoming forecast. “Well, there’s more to it. Snow’s coming in,” you relayed to Jimin. “Let’s pack up and find a place to stay.” 

The car ride to the nearest lodging felt immensely different than the ride to the campgrounds. Some people focused on defrosting, one person worried about the people in the front, and the two said people in the front weren’t talking at all. 

It was you that broke the silence when you steadily gave directions, and Seokjin would repeat them like always. Selfishly, you wanted the car ride to keep going just so you could hear his voice. He wasn’t saying anything otherwise, and there wasn’t music playing for him to absentmindedly sing along to. 

The first snowfall was light as your caravan entered the small town nearby, which relieved you. Tiny snowflakes clung onto the windows and you lost yourself in their geometric patterns. Lights from the shops and other stray cars reflected in the slick roads to create a symphony of color, and white patches already settled on trees that lined the main way. 

Seokjin spotted the lodge first, and he rolled into a spot towards the entrance, Jungkook’s car slotting into the next space. Your driver rolled down his window and repeatedly pointed his finger down to signal for Yoongi to follow suit. “Let’s go in and make sure they have our rooms first,” he called out, and Jungkook leaned over his console to shout a hearty okay.

You hoisted yourself out of the car and waited for the boys to follow. Seokjin went to stand next to you, but instead of Jungkook popping out of the other car, it was Namjoon that emerged. You could only guess that the youngest slyly started a game to have the loser get out. 

Your stomach turned when you realized it was most likely because no one wanted to be left alone with you and Seokjin. 

Remorse burned your throat. This trip was supposed to be fun, but it just felt strained. Were you overthinking? Or was your churning gut correct in its assumption? 

At the very least, you hoped everyone else was having a better time than you were. 

It seemed that the man beside you had the same feeling that a challenge was pitched. “Rock-paper-scissors? Or nose goes?”

Namjoon just laughed at the ground as his face flushed. “Nose goes, and I put my finger on my mouth so, umm, that’s that.” 

You chuckled while you three made your way to the door, both of them towering over you on either side. Seokjin opened the entrance for everyone and, when you stepped foot inside, you were hit with a wave of warmth mixed with an undercurrent of gingerbread. The entirety of the main entrance bathed in plaid or embroidered throws, and there was an obvious affinity for Christmas on display with the plethora of garlands, lights, and a towering Christmas tree in the front bay window. 

Namjoon and Seokjin quickly got distracted by the toy train running through a snowy village setup. Adorable, but not helpful. 

Alone at the front desk, you received confirmation that your group had four bookings, and you thanked the concierge while you gathered the keys. 

The rooms weren’t next to each other. One of them sat on another floor, and the rest were separated but shared the same level. 

A container of pamphlets caught your attention, so you grabbed one before strolling away. “Guys, let’s claim our rooms. After that, you can watch the train all you want,” you called out, tapping them both on the back with the thin brochure. 

They swiveled their heads to your retreating form before following you out the door. 

“No. We are not doing that again.” 

“Come on, hyung, it’ll be fun!” 

“I’m with Yoongi on this one. We could all end up in the same room.” 

“But what if you get a room to yourself?” 

“Why can’t we ever just pick like normal people? And Hoseok-hyung, you laugh but you have the worst luck out of all of us.” 

“Excuse me! That’s only because you all psyche me out!” 

“Let’s just pick something. My phone’s almost dead.” 

You stood next to Rin while you two watched the boys decide how room assignments were determined. It was a sight to see: them crowding the small hallway, bags littered around their bulky shoes. You both were thankful they were courteous enough to let you two keep a room to yourselves. They even made sure yours wasn’t on the other floor, just so that you girls wouldn’t be alone. 

They were going to pick random rooms one-by-one, not knowing which options the others picked until they opened a door. If you and your friend also had to choose, you were risking the possibility of being stuck with Seokjin, which was the last thing you wanted. 

On a day where your friendship was actually normal, that wouldn’t have mattered one bit. But right then? The tension surrounding him would have been detrimental. 

He had something to say; he wasn’t saying it. You were a sitting, fidgeting duck. 

Jungkook whipped his phone out to search the internet for a random coin flip generator. “Here. Heads, we do it. Tails, we don’t.” 

Yoongi just snickered in defeat and already started picking up his bag. “I call picking first.” 

His intuition proved sharp as the generator pulled up Heads: they were going with the random room assignments. Taehyung kicked his head back with a sigh, and Jimin and Jungkook burst into laughter while the elders collectively groaned.  

As Rin giggled at their misfortune, you sent a rueful smile Seokjin’s way out of habit. You were still friends, after all, and he seemed so distraught over the prospect of horrid results. His eyes locked onto yours and, for a brief moment, he offered a shy grin in return.

The fluttering in your chest was quickly shooed away. 

It was while everyone relaxed around a public lounge area that Jungkook hurled an accusation, his eyes alight with the flames licking the nearby fireplace. “Hyung cheated.” 

Seokjin immediately sat up in his plush chair and retorted, “Take that back! I did nothing of the sort. You all were just too lazy to take the stairs to the next floor.”

Taehyung shot him a side eye and shared his own eloquent opinion. “Seems sus.” 

A whole new wave of bickering erupted, and you redirected your attention to the snow storm blustering outside tall windows. 

You were thanking every deity above that you guys decided to leave in time. It would’ve been hell in the campsite during this weather, or even while squeezed into the cars. 

Though the original plans were derailed, you were pretty happy with the current lodging situation. Who knew a small town would have a humongous lodge? It had to be assumed that this was the main business keeping the town running. Rin was absolutely drinking it in and stated she even wanted to bring her family there, her thoughtfulness curving your mouth upwards.

Another good thing that came out of this trip proved to be the room assignments that Jungkook ended up loathing. They had you clutching your sides when all was said and done.

Four of the boys managed to pick the same room, and Hoseok and Yoongi snagged a room to themselves. These results resulted in one Kim Seokjin speeding up and down the hallway, wholeheartedly shouting with glee. Yoongi almost crumpled to the ground in relief at the end, and Hoseok fell over in laughter when he entered the full room. You could feel the desperation in Namjoon’s muffled voice as he begged Seokjin to let him change rooms. The only reply he received was an ominous “If you behave.” 

“Don’t blame us,” Yoongi laughed out, both hands lightly gripping the arms of the rocking chair he chose. “This is what you young people get for trying to be cute.” His relief from only having to bunk with one other person left him chipper, you noticed. To his credit, it was amusing that the youngest four ended up in the same room. 

“Okay, gramps,” Jungkook snapped, earning a laugh from Jimin on the seat next to him. “But she definitely gave hyung clues!” 

You whipped your head around to shoot a confused look toward your accuser. “Me?” 

Multiple eyes darted between you two like pinballs, and you didn’t have time to brace for his next words,

“You know you won’t see him again after this trip, so you—” 

“—Kook!” 

All oxygen abandoned you as Jimin rushed to shut the younger man’s mouth, practically slapping his face. Eyes popped out of his head as Jungkook paled in realization. 

The rest of the boys bore glares into the youngest one’s countenance, but Seokjin turned directly towards you with concern. 

What just happened? Your fingers gripped the varnished wood of your chair as you slowly locked eyes with your ex, and your heart dropped like a stone when he shifted his gaze to the floor. 

What the fuck was happening? Your brain was going haywire. What did Jungkook mean? You wouldn’t see Seokjin after this trip? The man that you couldn’t wait to see on the last Friday of every November? That was bogus. He was joking. It was a joke, right? One more weekend before Seokjin was gone from your life forever? Impossible. Ludicrous.

Why wasn’t anyone saying anything? 

Beside you, Rin clutched one of your tense fists in her soft palms. Addressing the group, her sharp tone demanded an answer when she asked, “What the hell is going on?” 

The silence that followed was palpable. Not even the pleasant music drifting through the lodge was enough to damper the tension. 

“I think,” Yoongi finally murmured, his words ice, “This is our cue to leave.”  

“No need,” your friend snipped, “We’ll go.” She whispered your name before softly tugging you to vacate your seat. 

When you pried yourself from the cushion, it took a moment for you to control your legs to actually move. You knew all the guys were watching you, but you were too embarrassed to acknowledge them, too upset to look any of them in the eye. 

Rin led you away from the lounge, making sure you were heading toward the nearest staircase before spinning on her heel. “To the unfortunate soul that gets to explain this to me,” she bit, clutching everyone’s attention in her underlying threat, “Text me where to meet you in ten minutes.” 

Both you and Rin occupied the carpet, backs against the cookie cutter sofa that existed in each room. 

You two pushed the furniture around so that the couch faced the windows instead of the plain TV, and you surprised your friend by dumping yourself onto the ground instead of the cushions. Rin didn’t question you, though. She only followed suit. 

The curtains were shoved to the side to reveal the relentless storm, and you watched the swirls and streaks of white until your head fell onto Rin’s shoulder. 

“I should’ve been paying attention to you,” she murmured, “I’m sorry.”

You shook your head, the motion feeling awkward in its tilt. “No, no. You’ve been having a fun time, so I’m happy I didn’t ruin that.” Your laugh was dry. “Until now, at least.”

Rin lowered her shoulder so that you rested more comfortably. “How are you feeling?” 

“Like I’m going through a breakup again.”

Fuck. You didn’t realize until the words left your lips that it’s how you really felt. 

It had been a few years since you guys ended things. Throughout that whole time, you didn’t feel awkward one bit.  

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. The “date” that Seokjin brought to the Christmas party last year made you want to tear your hair out. But, that was because she was obviously after his finances and that was the year you realized you loved him. 

The conversation you had with Seokjin turned sour, but you really wanted him to see the big picture. You could still recall that night with clarity, the snow falling much lighter than what you currently witnessed outside. 

“Seokjin, do you honestly think she likes you?” The red dress you wore was so vibrant that it glinted off the dinnerware spread across the decadent table nearby. 

When you pulled your ex aside that night, the only quiet place you could find was the dining room, long abandoned once everyone got their seconds. Up until this point, it was obvious Seokjin wasn’t understanding you. You tried to tell him how you saw it, and he would just brush things aside. 

“You sound like you care more than I do,” he accused, his eyes looking everywhere but your face.

Before you responded, you scoffed. “I’m your friend. Of course I’m going to care.” 

You remember the strong emotions you suppressed that night. You couldn’t let more things slip than necessary. Yes, you could show him you cared. Yes, you could show him he needed someone else. Just as long as you didn’t give too much of your own feelings for him away. “You deserve someone that at least likes you, for you.” 

Seokjin finally stared back at your stormy features, his eyes filled with something unsaid. You sucked in a breath. What else would he say? You liked him for everything he was, but that relationship didn’t pan out. Obviously. You would’ve been going to this Christmas party together if you still dated. 

Maybe you shouldn’t have been having that conversation - it was already hard enough for you to say you were his friend. You wanted to be more than that. Again. 

“I know she doesn’t like me,” he finally admitted, running a hand through his bangs. The urge to caress his ever soft strands filled you with grief. 

You really did like his hair, and it looked even better when coupled with his Nutcracker-esque attire. 

“Then why…” You struggled to find a reason why they were even there together. It was a Christmas party with your friends. Why would he bring someone that he didn’t like? 

“She’s interested in Namjoon.” Seokjin’s eyes quickly turned into crescents when he witnessed your expression, and his full lips pursed to contain his laughter. “I was trying to get her off me the whole night, but she was trying harder than she needed to to make him jealous. I’m irresistible, you know.” 

“Irritable is more like it,” you growled, playfully shoving him aside. “Ass! I was just trying to protect you and you knew this whole time!” 

“It’s nice to know you’re looking out for me!” The man beamed as he made his way out of the dining room. 

“Yeah, well,” you whispered, tensing slightly when he stopped. “They have to be perfect. It’s what you deserve.” And you really did mean that.  

Seokjin’s smile faltered, and you shot him a half-smile before exiting the room yourself. 

That was the last time you guys had an argument, if you could even call it that. The rest of the moments you had with him were completely fine. You wondered if Seokjin could see through you during that conversation. He was perceptive, sure, but you may have gotten away with looking like just a good friend. 

It was just worrisome since you couldn’t control your emotions that night. You only got to see him in person during these November trips and Christmas parties when you went home, after all. Seeing him again after realizing you loved him ignited something within you, and it took the whole night to put that fire out.

This looming news just felt way too heavy to handle. Was it because you reached where the sidewalk ended? You weren’t going to see his face in person or hear his laugh out loud. There wasn’t going to be off-the-cuff, awful dad jokes thrown your way every end of November. 

A nagging idea, far in the depths of your mind, kept tapping your shoulder. But you brushed it off with a scowl. 

Even if you acknowledged the concept, there was no way Seokjin felt the same about you. Neither one of you said you loved each other throughout the time you were dating. Were there times you thought you did? Admittedly, yes. Did you ever think about telling him? Another yes. But he never hinted that he felt the same, so it would’ve been awkward for you if it turned out he didn’t. The absence of a confession kept you from revealing yours. So of course even now, you couldn’t tell him. Especially since he was apparently leaving.

Rin didn’t speak for awhile, but you knew she wasn’t the best at comforting people. She was number one at standing up for you and protecting you, but when it came to the softer parts of consoling, she did flounder. Which was endearing and calming in itself.

“How can I help,” she simply offered, and you nuzzled further into her neck. She always smelled so nice, your guardian Rin.

The adrenaline from Jungkook’s bombshell, your swift exit, and the constant stream of thoughts started to wane. Exhaustion slowly took its place like honey sliding into a jar. Softly, your eyelids drooped and you whispered, “This room is a castle, so be my big bad dragon and don’t let anyone in.” 

The last sound you heard before falling asleep was a tinkling laugh followed by a small “As you wish, princess.” 

When you regained consciousness, you discovered that you were strewn across one of the beds instead of the ground. You couldn’t even estimate how much time passed while you were out, but the storm outside was still thrashing and the only light in the room was the emergency one by the door. 

You groggily propped up weary limbs in search of your phone, eventually swiping it from the nightstand. Still half-asleep, you barely registered the pain meds and glass of water sitting on that same table, their dark silhouettes waiting patiently. 

Bright pixels mocked your drool-covered chin. Scrunching your face instinctively, you scrolled through your notifications while blinking sleep from your lashes. You received multiple texts, but you didn’t want to open the threads completely, so you opted to check them from the Home screen. 

Jiminie [7:20pm]: Fuck, I’m sorry that happened. Please be okay. Love you.

Tae [7:21pm]: free hugs whenever you need. you know the drill. 

Rin-Rin [7:36pm]: I know you said not to let anyone in but I literally couldn’t carry you to the bed. Forgive me!

Yoongi [7:37pm]: He’s in his room. I kept telling him to tell you. I know it’s shit to find out this way so if he doesn’t explain things to you, I will. 

Hobi [7:39pm]: we’re here for u love!! let me know if u need anything. there’s a small concession stand downstairs so if u need smth i can run it up!!

Jiminie [7:40pm]: Kook is in bad shape. He swore he thought hyung told you already. Don’t worry tho. I’m not letting him off easy.

Rin-Rin [7:43pm]: Hey, love. Just spoke to Seokjin. I think you need to talk to him yourself, but only if you feel up for it. 

Joonie [7:45pm]: I gave Rin a bottle of pain meds we had in our room 

Joonie [7:45pm]: Go ahead and take some when you wake up

Joonie [7:45pm]: We can count this as an emergency

Jiminie [8:21pm]: Let me know if you’re okay, okay?

Kook [8:33pm]: I’m so sorry 

Rin-Rin [8:48pm]: Grabbing us some snacks from downstairs, I’ll brb. 

Your battered heart sank even more when you noticed a distinct absence amongst the names. Seokjin didn’t send you a single message. 

What had gotten into him? Did he still not want to talk to you despite you knowing his secret? You clicked your phone shut without opening any of the messages and sunk into the pillows. It was 8:49pm, so you had barely missed Rin’s departure. Her exit was probably what woke you. 

Unwittingly, you found your device in front of your baggy eyes again, berating yourself for hovering over Seokjin’s thread. The last text he sent stared back at you in a mocking set of pixels. 

Kim JokeJin [Thursday, 9:23pm]: Let’s make this one the best one! 

With the previous context, this was just a regular message about the yearly trip. With the right context, these words tied your throat in a knot.  

You were sure you loved him, but what you were feeling now was even stronger. If you were honest with yourself, you would say that this is what yearning truly felt like, what something deeper than love felt like. 

But you were a fool and a liar, so you convinced yourself it was only because you wouldn’t see him again. 

As soon as you were about to give up and lock your phone, the thread updated with a new text from Seokjin, and you stilled. 

Kim JokeJin [8:51pm]: You’re probably still asleep, so I don’t want to wake you. 

You immediately clicked on his message, your anxiousness protected by the absence of Read receipts. The typing bubble kept popping in and out of the screen and, with bated breath, you waited to see if a second text slid into the thread. A hard exhale whooshed from your throat when the second message came through. 

Kim JokeJin [8:53pm]: But I owe you an explanation so come up when you can. 

Fingers locked your phone in an instant when the door creaked on its hinges. Rin entered with an armful of chips and various candy bars, and as you started to get up, she tutted.  

“Sit down, lady.” Packages crinkled as she dumped them onto your covered legs in a processed, sweet and salty heap. “Did you take the medicine?” 

You shook your head, very sure that you looked like a cranky Troll doll. 

“Go ahead and eat something really quick so the medicine will work. When you’re awake enough…” Rin’s voice trailed off, but you filled in the blanks yourself. Go talk to him was what she wanted to say. 

“Can’t you just tell me what he said?” You were hopeful that Rin would save you the pain of confronting Seokjin yourself. In reality, she denied your request. 

“Not this time,” she murmured, “This is something that needs to come from him.” 

You figured as much, but it didn’t hurt to try getting out of it. It was a conversation that you both wanted and dreaded to have. Under your goosebumps, your bones trembled.

If you were frightened by the mere gist of it, how were you going to react to the real thing?

The reality was that you needed the closure Seokjin was offering. You didn’t think this vacation - or your friendship, for that matter - could regain normalcy until you had this talk. “Sorry I ruined this trip,” you whispered, playing with a corner of the closest bag of chips. 

“I’m sorry, is your name ‘Jungkook?’” Rin laughed. “I’m kidding. It’s not ruined. At the very least, it’s salvageable. Maybe.”

“You should be a weather girl with these confident forecasts,” you joked, coaxing a laugh from your friend. You offered a small smile in return, but your heart wasn’t in it. She kinda forgot that this is the last trip you guys would have with Seokjin. If anything, it was doomed from the start. 

Little striations ran across the door greeting you, shallow cuts skirting up and down the frame. You roved your eyes over the rough texture; contemplative, lost in the mahogany brown expanse. 

If only you were a sturdy tree. You wouldn’t have to worry about any hard conversations in life. All you would’ve had to worry about was possibly becoming a rickety chair for a spoiled brat, or one of Namjoon’s tables that he would eventually damage and lament over. 

With a breath, you finally knocked. 

It didn’t take long for Seokjin’s freshly showered form to answer, and when you saw him dressed down to a plain white shirt and black pants, you quickly shifted your eyes to the floor. Didn’t he know that outfit was your favorite? Your weakness? 

“Hey,” you simply said. “I’m awake now.” 

He nodded and let you in, the door closing with a soft click. When you crossed the room, you stopped in front of the couch, anticipation already caking onto your clothes. There wasn’t much to say on your end, you figured, so Seokjin had to take the lead. 

Instead of launching into topic, he walked towards you and grabbed a bottle from his nightstand. “Do you want some water?” 

You could only stare at the plastic in question. “Did I come here for water, Seokjin?” 

There was a heavy pause before the man planted his offering on the nightstand. “No.” Sitting on the longer side of his bed, he clasped his hands together, blank eyes glued to the floor. “Jungkook is right. I won’t be able to go on these trips anymore.” 

“Why?” 

“I, umm,” Seokjin answered, his words fumbling, “I kinda got into Harvard Medical School.” 

“What?” Your anxiousness was forgotten as you gawked at him. That was what he was holding back from you? All this time? That amazing, fantastic, crazy news? Without thinking, you bounded toward him and crushed him in a hug, careful to not push him back onto the bed. “Seokjin! This is what you couldn’t tell me?” 

His arms remained at his sides. When he responded, his explanation bounced onto your shoulder, “I literally won’t have a life once I start. None of you will be able to see this face, isn’t that enough to be sad about?” 

Another moment of weakness came over you, and instead of overcoming it, you gave in. Your arms tightened around him and you whispered, “No, I’m so happy for you. You’ve worked so hard…” 

There were bags under his eyes for a reason. You knew the nights he got three hours of sleep far outweighed the nights he got more than that. The reason you two didn’t get to see each other was his relentless studying and discipline, and you didn’t want him to have to choose between you and a future career. You both were way too young for those rash decisions. 

It was with this memory that you were reminded of why you broke up: you wanted him to focus on his goals and you would do the same. “Really, I’m so proud of you.” 

Why you hadn’t let go of him at that point was a mystery to you, but you couldn’t seem to stop. The feel of his body against yours consumed you, held you captive even if his arms didn’t. 

But after a moment, you felt strong limbs wrap around your sides and emotion wrap around your throat. 

You don’t remember the last time you two truly embraced. It was a given that the last time you did, you were both completely different people. Both so young. Both so naive.

“Thank you,” Seokjin breathed, his head finally a beautiful burden on your shoulder, “But there’s more.” 

Tension froze your veins, taking the color from your complexion. Of course there was more. There was no way that was the big reveal, even though it was a monster in itself. “Oh,” was all you managed to squeak out. 

Seokjin’s arms gently pushed your body away so that he could look you in the eyes. You already missed his stronghold, but you listened as he spoke. “My parents want me to go back home. To Korea.” 

You blinked. “Even though you got into Harvard?” 

“No, no, after that,” Seokjin expressed with a level of confidence only he could achieve. Like it was inconceivable that he wouldn’t get his doctorate. He then searched your face, the pause holding weight. “So, I don’t know if I’ll see you guys again.” 

The wind howled outside and you shivered as if you were standing out there in the cold. There was so much that you wanted to say, but all the thoughts you had in your head melded together into sludge. Words struggled to leave your mouth. Nothing processed correctly in your brain. 

Seokjin wasn’t joking - not this time. He really was going to be swamped in work and work and more work. Even the holidays were going to be crammed, and you were sure he wanted to use those rare rest periods solely to recharge. 

Yes, he would still be able to text and call everyone, but that would be the extent of communication. He wasn’t big on social media. Even if he was, there would certainly be a dip in his activity now. 

Just like you felt earlier, you really did feel like you were going through a breakup again. Only this time, the last remains of your relationship were at stake. 

You didn’t want that. 

“We’d still be friends,” you weakly offered, wondering if you were just saying that to convince yourself. 

An empty chuckle startled you, and when you looked at Jin, he directed an empty gaze toward his nightstand’s lamp. “Yeah… We’d still be friends,” he repeated, and the way he said that made your shoulders sag. It was almost as if he didn’t believe you. 

“But Seokjin… You should be so happy. I mean, you’re incredible,” you whispered, a heavy feeling weighing down your chest.

“What if I’m not?” 

You sucked in a breath, suddenly not knowing what to do. Was he saying that hypothetically? No. There wouldn’t be a reason for him to ask if he truly was. 

How were you supposed to respond to that? Being a doctor was his goal - you were sure of it. If he got accepted into Harvard of all places, then his future glimmered as bright as his charm. “What do you mean,” was what you decided to say. Because you needed more from him than that. 

“You said I should be happy. What if I’m not?” 

“This is what you’ve been working towards your whole life!” It didn’t make any sense. None of this was making any sense. Who wasn’t happy that they got accepted to one of the most prestigious medical programs in the world? “You did everything you could, and now you have something to show for it! We even broke up over this. And that’s fine,” you quickly added at the end. You didn’t want Seokjin to feel bad for that at all. 

“What I’m trying to say is,” you continued, wanting to get every logical word out before more irrational ones escaped. “You’ve gotten everything you wanted. You deserve to be happy.” 

You could feel the doors of your heart scraping shut. Even if you wanted to try to be with him again, you would have to give up on that dream. There was no way it was going to work if it didn’t pan out last time. 

Fists clenched, you hated how your heart gravitated towards Seokjin on this damn trip, loathed how your brain produced its own highlight reel. Somehow, they both knew this was the end before you did. 

“I don’t have everything I want, but you’re right. I’ll be happy.” He sounded bitter. Why did he sound so bitter?

“What more could you want,” you blurted, the question materializing between the two of you in bold letters. You were just getting frustrated at this point. 

This was his dream. The ultimate goal. The one thing he wanted out of life.

“It doesn’t matter.” 

“It does to me.”

“Well, it’s none of your concern.”

“I don’t care if it is or not.”

“You really want to know?” Seokjin shot off the bed, immediately towering over your small stature. As your eyes reached his face, you watched as his lips twisted, your shocked features taking in his frustration. “It’s… It’s love, okay? That might sound weird to you, but I’ve realized that all of this is pointless without it. That’s what I’m missing. I want to love again.” He shoved a hand through his hair, his forehead slightly wrinkling under duress. 

The first thing that threw you off was the mere mention of the word. That was so brave of him to even bring it up. With you, of all people: someone he’s dated before. It must have taken so much courage for him to admit that. 

But there was another word in there that stood out amongst all the others.

Again. He said again. Did he love someone before? He couldn’t have been referring to what you guys had. You never once said those words to each other while you dated. So who was he thinking of? And why did it hurt to know that he had loved before and it wasn’t you? 

“I didn’t know you wanted that,” you replied, your voice painfully small. “But I don’t think it’s weird.”

You wanted nothing more than to just confess to him already, but you had no clue what he would say if he didn’t want something with you. The moment escaped like a thief in the night.

“Ah, well, if you knew the whole story,” Seokjin sighed, his breath shaky, “You would definitely think it’s stupid.”

“Why did it end the first time?” You wanted to get to the bottom of it. Maybe through his explanation, you could find something salvageable. You cared about him - so damn much. Seeing him in a state of utter helplessness seized your heart and gripped it tight. “With the one you… you loved. What happened?”

Seokjin’s indiscernible stare pierced through your soul, his silence screaming that he didn’t want to talk about it. 

And you understood his reluctance. The list of activities to do with an ex didn’t include this as an option, either. 

You felt the steely aftertaste of guilt on your tongue. Maybe he wanted you to just leave him alone already. Besides, you already pushed him to tell a multitude of truths that night. Asking him about a past love life was most likely crossing the line. “I’m sorry,” you apologized, uprooting yourself from your spot to leave. “You don’t have to tell me. I’ll leave you alone.” 

You made it three steps before Seokjin responded, “She decided to end it.” 

A vice clamped your chest. You stood in your new spot closer to the door, eyes boring into the floor. “Even though you were in love?” 

That must have been awful. If you loved him when you two broke it off, it would have absolutely hurt. Very much like what was happening to you now, in fact. Because fuck, were you absolutely disintegrating like a paper on fire. 

“I don’t think she loved me,” Seokjin disclosed, his words tightening the clasp around your lungs. “But I loved her.” 

“I’m so sorry, Seokjin.” Tears brimmed across your eyes, but you didn’t want him to see you break. You thrummed with so many emotions in that moment, swept by the current of his words, his heavy tribulations.

He loved someone in the past. You loved him in the present. If only you both harbored a love for each other in at least one point in your lives. 

“That must have been hard.”

“It wasn’t, for the most part.” His brittle words crumbled as they appeared. “I saw it coming.”

You chewed on your lip. Seokjin’s confessions were so full of pain - the amount of love he had for this person was obvious. Looking back on your relationship, you remember your split being mutual. It was mutual, right? There weren't any feelings involved. Whichever other situation Seokjin was referring to had to be sometime after you. 

Maybe it was someone during his college days. But wouldn’t you have at least heard about them through the friend circle? Their name must have just left your mind. You knew Seokjin flirted a lot but he needed to be serious to really start a relationship. This one just sounded tragic. 

“I don’t know what to say,” you admitted sincerely, your chest about ready to collapse, “Other than don’t give up. You can do it. Love again.” The joints in your knees threatened to give out. Telling the one you loved that he could find someone again was too much. Too, too much.

“Ah, yeah. Well.” Seokjin turned away from you in a shrug. Even the back of his profile was perfect. “Thanks for being a good, uh, friend.” 

Friend. Could you teleport to your room and stay there? You couldn’t be the one to give him what he wanted, especially since he was about to be gone for a very long time. No matter how much you wanted to. Oh, how you wanted to. 

You swung around to face the door once again. Critical words almost freed themselves from your lips, but you held them back, swallowed them down. “I’ll always be your friend.” 

Head storming, you commended yourself for keeping your voice level. The tears were able to recede - which relieved you, since you wanted to make it through the rest of the conversation with dry eyes. With one tiny head shake, you whispered, “Let’s get some sleep, okay? I don’t want us to ruin the rest of this trip. Like you said before, we have to make it the best one.” 

Seokjin got up and made his way over to you, and you turned around with a fresh face once you knew he was close enough. The smile he wore was manufactured, but you didn’t want to pry. Instead, you repeated your advice as you both approached his door. Because you wanted him to understand. “Seriously. Don’t give up, you hear me?” 

“Don’t give up,” he echoed as he pulled on the handle, like you were just giving him directions. He stilled for a moment in deep concentration before looking your way. Dark eyes bore into yours and you could almost hear them speak, but he gave one final nod and vowed, “Okay.” 

Little striations met you again when you gave Seokjin’s closed room one last look, and you swore they regarded you with pity. Finally breaking, you let your tears fall the whole way back to your floor, wishing to be made into a sturdy tree in your next life so you never had to feel that way again. 

The next morning found all nine friends situated in various places around Seokjin’s room. You thought it amusing that the boys never really settled for normal seats, always choosing a table or windowsill perch instead. As an avid fan of the floor yourself, apparently, you were once again plopped on the ground in front of the sofa. Only this time, you weren’t drowning in the depths of your past.  

“Looks like the snow piled up high last night, so we might not be able to use the cars,” Namjoon observed after his long fingers created a tiny crack in the curtains. His argyle sweater blended in with the burgundy fabric and the sight put a small smile on your face. 

The action surprised you since you spent the whole night swathed in a blanket of regret, your arms caging your ribs in an attempt to stopper your bleeding heart. If only you were so bold as to allow a confession to fall from your lips. Three words to solve two peoples’ problems.  

But the risk involved was too high. The hurt following an unrequited love confession would haunt you through every sunrise and sunset. 

Jungkook’s exasperated voice sliced through your thoughts. “What are we gonna do then?” You glanced at him right as he threw himself onto Seokjin’s bed, bouncing the other two occupants  like buoys amongst waves. 

“What we can do: stay in,” Yoongi responded while repositioning himself against the headboard. 

Taehyung’s sigh mingled with Rin’s tsking noise, Jungkook’s deeper groan almost in harmony with the both of them. Their melancholic concerto almost pulled a laugh out of you, but the next suggestion came from Hoseok, “I brought some board games we could play. Cards, too.” 

Seokjin quickly shot him a look. “You don’t play board games. Or games. Or cards. Actually, what do you do?” 

“I look after all of you.” Hoseok’s head always bobbed when he spoke to accentuate his points. “Hence why I brought board games and cards just in case!” 

You couldn’t refute the man’s claims, either. Hoseok always made sure everyone packed what they needed before trips but brought extra stuff in the event that the group needed something else. Helping was just part of his nature. Yesterday was one example. Rin got the snacks last night, but you were sure he would have woken up at any point in time to be your comfort food delivery man. If being a leader were a sport, Hoseok would be the dark horse that you never saw coming until they finished first. Then you couldn’t deny their talent and skill. 

Taehyung didn’t let the dark horse live, though. “Thanks, hyung. Did you pack a snowblower, too?” 

Rin’s laugh could always be heard amongst your friends, but not because she was a girl. Hers was just so distinct and heartwarming, like a cozy throw or the thought of cookies in the oven. It was only slightly better than Jimin’s. 

Speaking of which: Jimin was eerily quiet throughout the whole meeting, his gaze lingering on you more than once. You noticed it ever since you burst into Seokjin’s room and lauded the man’s scholastic advancement. Which couldn’t be helped. No matter how painful last night’s conversation was, you still wanted him to know how proud you were. After all, a person could be sporting a dagger through their heart but still have love to give.  

You didn’t know why Jimin was acting strange. The big secret was unveiled but you would come to terms with it. Was he afraid of how you would be feeling? Or was he just sympathizing with you because he assumed you weren’t exactly fine? Talking to him later to iron things out was going to be essential. The multiple glances he threw your way proved too much.  

“I have a pamphlet we can look through,” you responded, waving it in the air like a white flag. The decision to bring it just in case proved to be the right one, even if Rin threw a small fit from having to fumble through her bag for the room key again. Warmth from the thick hoodie swallowing both your body and your bent legs validated the first time you went back into your room. 

Rin stuck her tongue out at you but smiled right after in her best Sour Patch Kid impression. Cute. You breathily laughed before unfolding the flimsy paper. Shifting your eyes along the colorful pages, you started listing out the lodge activities. “Okay, so we have… Kayaking: no. Lake yoga: no. Mountain biking: no…” 

Even though the lodge boasted a huge amount of things to do, the majority of them required there to not be four billion inches of snow outside. Only a few remained, and majority rules determined ski slopes the winner. 

The only issue with the slopes was that they only allowed groups of three at a time. To remedy this, groups were formed and a rotation was set based on a heated tournament of rock-paper-scissors. And while Hoseok didn’t play board games, cards, or even video games, he seemed to be a pro at that. 

He picked Seokjin and Yoongi for his group, and they were going out first, to the eldest’s horror. You saw his anxiousness coming from miles out - tackling snow with one board was much more up his alley than tackling it with two. 

Next, Jungkook chose Namjoon and Jimin since he wanted to somehow “win” on the slopes. They gave him much grief for that. 

And that left you with Rin and Taehyung, but they wanted to check out the spa area first, so your group was going to catch up later. 

Which wasn’t ideal for you. You wanted to watch Seokjin ski. Or really, you just wanted to see him as much as possible before the trip ended. Seok in his presence, like he said. Maybe being pruny in this case was a beautiful thing. 

Room Service knocking on the door interrupted your thoughts, and Jimin let them in to serve the breakfast Seokjin ordered for everyone prior. While the dishes were distributed, the group was already firing bets and insults and digs at each other as if a clear winner would emerge outside. And you welcomed every bit of their energy. Chewing on food while basking in everyone’s competitive nature was enough of a distraction from your woes. At least, until you caught Jimin deep in thought again.

The spa was decent, so you three ended up staying for almost an hour. Both the sauna and facial massage served to ease the thick layer of tenseness under your skin. If only you could transport yourself into a cloud of steam every time you thought about Seokjin. Maybe that would’ve helped with the anxiousness and guilt you felt every time you thought about confessing. 

And you were grateful for Taehyung tagging along because he really did offer free hugs often. Even while Rin scanned over the receipt for everything you guys did, the man slung a lean arm around your shoulders. 

His voice glided over your hair when he leaned in to ask, “How did it go last night?” 

You sighed before responding, debating on how to answer him. You decided to take the easy route. “Good. Better than I expected. I just can’t believe it took him that long to tell me! I was so worried this whole time.” 

Taehyung squeezed you gently. “Finally. We kept telling him to just admit it already.” 

Rin was in the middle of paying when you smiled. Her hair gleamed in the incandescents, and you reached out to touch it as you admitted, “It’s just weird that he wanted to hide that from me.” 

“Well, you’re his ex, so he thought it would’ve been awkward.” 

A laugh shot out of you, and Taehyung gave you a look. “Seokjin’s so strange. He knows I’ve been rooting for him this whole time. I mean, Harvard? That’s incredible.” 

Normally, friends would converse about achievements and be sincerely happy about them. But something else happened in that moment that set alarm bells off in your head. Whether it was Rin becoming a block of ice in front of you, or Taehyung slowly peeling his arm off of your shoulders, you suddenly got a feeling that something wasn’t right.  

When Rin spun around to face you, the expression painted on her face reminded you of those Renaissance pieces you saw during one museum date with your ex. Her eyebrows artfully scrunched; her full lips twisted. Was she on the side of the angels, battling demons? Going to war? 

No, she was just trying to clarify something. “He didn’t say anything else?” 

You gulped. “I mean, yeah?”

“What did he say?” Taehyung furrowed his dark brows, his own face a work of art in itself. 

“That his parents are making him move back to Korea when he’s done with his doctorate,” you revealed, suspicious of the both of them and Seokjin now. You kept your tone level to hide any emotions under the surface. “Why, is there more?” 

Once again, you were swept under the wave of confusion. The waters there were dark and cold, and you felt like you couldn’t swim to safety this time. It was as if cotton clogged your ears and a thin film coated your vision. You didn’t even register Taehyung furiously typing on his phone while Rin led you all out of the spa’s reception area. 

“Do you want there to be more,” was all she offered before sitting you down on an earthly toned loveseat. The fluffy rug under your shoes snagged most of your attention. 

“I don’t know how to answer that, but I guess not,” you finally grunted, feeling angrier and angrier from being left in the dark again. Comparable to a disease, this dangerous feeling was taking over you, trickling into your veins drop by black drop. “Honestly, I kinda just want to go back to the room until we meet for dinner. Whatever you guys are hiding is starting to piss me off.” 

“Let’s go,” Rin agreed, urging you to get up and follow her to the room. But you shook her off. 

“I’ll go by myself.” Buzzing with anger, you shuffled through your bag to grip your key. “Just let me be alone for a bit.”

Taehyung looked absolutely livid, but he nodded along with Rin. You didn’t watch the two of them share a knowing glance as you drug your crumpling form to the stairs, hoping pieces of you didn’t crumble off before you reached your temporary bed.  

From the moment your tired bones hit your comforter, time traveled at a strange pace. You didn’t know how long you spent lying prone on the sheets, your head lolled towards the window. Watching the light snowfall outside did nothing to bring you out of your dark space. 

Being left out, confused, and feeling betrayed left you mentally drained. How long were you going to feel like this? Like you were just going to keep being lied to? Maybe you weren’t outwardly lied to, but omitting something was still considered a lie. The truth was still held captive and you couldn’t even pay it a visit. 

Rin and Taehyung reacted strongly to what you said. That had to mean whatever else Seokjin was supposed to say to you was big. You weren’t stupid. At least, that’s what you concluded. 

But what if you were this time? 

You loathed this feeling. You hated being looked at with pity. Even Rin knew what was left unsaid this time, so you were truly alone in the dark. 

A dark monster within you rose to life, and you ripped yourself from the sheets. Snatching your coat from the couch, you jerked your arms inside, striding toward your door with purpose. A ball of fury, you were determined to march up the slopes and confront Seokjin. Everything was getting ridiculous. 

Tugging the door open, you flinched at the figure waiting on the other side. A brief moment of silence and bewilderment and worry washed over you, quelling a small part of your harbored anger. “What happened to you?” 

Seokjin stood in front of you wrapped in his puffy coat, hair in disarray and a small gash on his cheek. His nose was red with the cold and a small cut, and his eyes looked as if he had been holding back tears. Tears? Was he crying? Even now, it seemed like a few were threatening to fall as his gaze lowered. A ghost of a voice wafted from his mouth as he replied, “Jimin.” 

You winced. Remembering the glances the younger man gave you this morning, you should have seen a conflict brewing. Your friend wasn’t lying when he said he’d give Seokjin hell. Something must have broken out when they were on the slopes, or anytime you weren’t there with them. “Shit. I’m sorry.” 

If you didn’t have that revelation with Rin and Taehyung, you would have been absolutely thrown by Seokjin’s appearance and the cause of it. But it seemed that both groups found out what he told you last night and neither were pleased with the result. What that result was, you couldn’t determine yet. But based on your own categories, “I got into Harvard” and “I’m moving back to Korea” fit in the Should Know box. The Deserved to Know box was still accepting applications. 

“Come in.” Your fury had to simmer on a proverbial stove for the time being. “I have a first aid kit in my bag.” 

You hurried him into the room before making a beeline for your duffle. The adrenaline built while you were fired up was still thrumming your bones like guitar strings. Nothing more was said as your bag crinkled with your rummaging, even though you wanted to just wring answers from his neck already. 

But you couldn’t. You needed a moment to collect your thoughts, both the past woes you were fighting and your current worries. 

As Jin awkwardly stood in front of your bed, you kept pondering. What the hell happened out there? How did it end up in a physical altercation? Did Jin fight back? It was already obvious Jimin initiated it, but you wondered if he sported any bruises, too. Not from Seokjin, though. Because you couldn’t ever see him throwing a punch. You were more curious about someone like Yoongi. The elder one was incredibly protective of Jin.

When you found the kit, you spun around to start tending to your ex’s face. “Bed,” you ordered, pointing towards yours with the first aid box. Your tone was harsh, but you weren’t holding it back.

The man was silent as he delicately sat on the comforter, and you instantly noticed how he refused to look at you still. 

No matter. Treating his cuts was a priority, but that didn’t mean you weren’t going to force him into confrontation right after. Seokjin wasn’t going to have a choice. 

Perching yourself next to him, you propped one leg up to steady yourself, clicking open the small kit next to you. It wasn’t as fancy as the one he carried along, but it housed the basics. Fetching some antiseptic and cotton first, you told him to turn towards you so that you could start. 

And despite your anger, your exasperation, your frustration, the hands you lifted to Seokjin’s face were nothing but calm. 

Throughout the time you dusted his cuts, you kept your gaze on his cheek, his mouth, his nose. A wall erected around you that you refused to take down. After all of the hurt Seokjin had caused, the turmoil he had put you through, it was pertinent you wouldn’t let him in. You had your soldiers’ arrows at the ready, directed right at his wounded face. 

But if you so much as flitted your gaze toward his eyes, your walls would crumble to dust. Your gates would slam open in surrender. 

Because having him this close to you after all this time was like coming home. And you harbored that feeling ever since the scent of his cologne consumed you. Your face hovered inches from his, your fingers gently pressing his features. All of the nights you yearned to be this close were so lonely and cold, and his warmth was tugging your heart by multiple strings. 

His looming absence was hitting you deeply then. If you gave in only to lose him again, the pain would surely hollow out your soul until you were a mere shell of yourself. You wanted nothing more than to sink into the mattress and slip down into the soil underneath the lodge. 

Suddenly, a hand cradled your cheek, and you shook on impact. Without thinking, you locked eyes with Jin, and it was then that you realized he was wiping hot tears from your face. 

“If I’m the reason for these,” he whispered, “I’m sorry.” 

Something strangled escaped you, and you finally caved. “You are,” you exhaled, unable to stop the tears from falling. “You really are.”

You tore yourself from the bed, instantly feeling the lingering warmth of his fingers fade. A chasm was created between you two: your chest heaving on one side and his face crumbling on the other. The mountain of thoughts and feelings you created broke down under pressure, emotions roaring down its slopes in a cathartic avalanche. “I’ve been looking like a fool this whole trip, and apparently everyone is feeling so fucking sorry for me. Why can’t you just tell me everything? What did Yoongi mean? What do I deserve to know? You told me you got into Harvard and have the audacity to say you aren’t happy? What the hell is that about? We’re supposed to be friends, so why am I feeling like you’re letting that all go?” You choked on your tears and clasped a hand over your mouth, a burn blossoming in your chest from the dry sobs. 

Seokjin’s eyes ringed with a burgeoning shade of pink, both of his pupils glossed in guilt. “I’m not… I’m not letting that go, but--”

“But what, Seokjin,” you gritted out, “Please stop and just tell me already.” 

“But I was too scared,” he admitted, “I’m still scared.” 

“Why are you scared?” The question drifted to his face, and you could tell he was struggling to answer even that one. It pained you to be this close yet so far from the answer.

“Why are you scared, Seokjin,” you whispered again, realizing that his hands were shaking. 

“Because…” You watched as he clenched them on his thighs, and he struggled to get the words out. “Because it’s going to happen again.” 

Enough with the obscurity. Frustration reached a boiling point. “What’s going to happen again?” 

“Exactly what happened last time!” Seokjin declared as his eyes pleaded with you, eyebrows furrowed and kneeling in anguish. The skin encasing his watery eyes remained that same dusty shade of affliction. 

You couldn’t for the life of you understand what he was saying, until you remembered last night. When you asked him about the time he loved before. 

Wait.

Your hand made a slow descent from your face as you matched Seokjin’s stare. A million words skittered across your eyes, transforming into liquid and sliding down your skin. You were sure you looked an absolute wreck with your tear-stained cheeks and reddened nose, but that didn’t concern you at all. The only thing you could hang onto was Jin’s words, just short of a confession. 

But you had to be sure. You weren’t settling for five words that could mean a thousand other things while arranged the same way. “The one from before,” you more stated than questioned, “Where is she now.” 

Seokjin never broke his gaze, doing an incredible job of keeping tears at the edges of his eyes. Heavy breaths caused his chest to swell with each pass. Voice low, he finally, finally caved, “She’s the one on the polaroid I have in my room.” 

The entire conversation from last night struck you like a freight train. So many realizations hit you at once and you didn’t know how your trembling legs were keeping you upright. 

It was you. He was talking about you. 

Your coat smothered your limbs like a cage, your whole being rattling inside like an animal starved. 

That was what he was truly hiding from you. That was what he had buried deep down into his chest. And you couldn’t blame him one bit after you realized it was exactly what you were holding from him, too. 

No matter the reason, you still kept your own truth hidden. It occurred to you then that you couldn’t be angry - that would just be hypocrisy. There was bravery in confession, and even more so to someone you no longer were allowed to feel that way about. 

You were the one that forced the truth out of Seokjin, and now you only felt like a coward. 

Movement in front of you snapped your vision back into focus. He was getting up to leave. Why was he leaving? 

“I knew this would happen,” he said, his voice strained. “I’ll go. I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable.” 

Oh. He assumed your silence was from guilt. Guilt that you didn’t feel the same. And he was about to walk out with that egregious misconception. What an absolute fool.

But no matter how hard you tried, the words wouldn’t budge from the back of your teeth. 

You had two choices here. One, you told him. You laid everything out and you admitted that you felt the same. Then tomorrow, he would leave your life and you may not see him again for years. And you tried this before - being in two separate schools and living different lives while holding onto your relationship. It obviously didn’t work last time, and you still saw him from time to time. This situation would be a thousand times harder. 

Which brought you to the second option: you let him go. You let him leave without telling him how you felt. Rip the bandage off right there and then. Leave him to pursue his dream, and with that the freedom to go and find someone else to love. Was that what you wanted? Was this your own sick version of loving him? All the villains in the universe would applaud you as you lied to his face while telling him not to give up. How fucking cruel would that be?

“Seokjin,” you called out, and your chest subtly heaved when he turned to stone by the door. His broad back remained still as you took a step towards him, and only after you roamed your eyes over his shoulders did you notice small movements. But he didn’t face you. It was almost as if he didn’t want to.

Agony consumed your entire being as you made your decision. 

You shut your eyes, clenched your jittering fingers into hard fists. 

“See you at the campfire,” you whispered, your voice unfamiliar even to yourself. 

The only response you got was the soft opening and closing of your door.

Compared to last night’s lion of a snow storm, tonight was but a mere cub. There were small flakes here and there taking their time to descend, and the fixtures from inside the lodge were the only light source beside the fire pit you were approaching downstairs. 

Situated in the center of your friends, the flames danced across their jovial smiles as they passed bottles around. The drinks weren’t the lodge’s, but the ones you all brought and snuck out of the rooms - the telltale green glass was enough of a hint. 

After Seokjin left, it took you a couple minutes to let everything out, and about thirty minutes crying into Rin’s shoulder once she witnessed your crumpled form on the floor. She listened to your recap of the conversation and Jin’s final secret, and through broken sobs you told her you couldn’t tell him yours. When she asked why, you told her your reasoning. When she called you an idiot, you wholeheartedly agreed and cried even harder. 

But you still stuck with your decision. It was for the best. You loved him so much that you wanted what was best for him, and that was to let you go. 

“Promise me one thing,” Rin murmured, earning a nod from you. “Only go through with it if you know you won’t regret it.” 

A sharp pain sliced through you then, but you acquiesced. “I won’t.” 

She then grabbed your Polaroid from the bed. It was Namjoon’s idea to bring it to the campfire once he heard you brought it on the trip. “Are you okay with this?” 

“Yeah,” you gulped, regarding the old piece of the past with heavy eyes. Seokjin confessed to you with the help of that camera. You weren’t okay with the mere idea of touching it. “Yeah, it’s fine. I want everyone to enjoy themselves tonight, so. Yes.” 

Even if that meant you suffered. This was Seokjin’s last trip with everyone, not just you. Why keep them from making good memories just because you were a walking dark cloud?

You reached the bottom of the rickety stairs, the squeaky noises catching the attention of the boys. Most of them raised their bottles to you, but you caught Jin staring at the fire instead. 

If you got through this night in one piece, it would be a miracle.

Namjoon stood as you and Rin settled into your seats. “Okay. Since we’re all here now, I say we start.” 

As everyone gave their cheers, the eldest just looked confused. “Start what?”

“Something for you,” Yoongi explained, his body already comfortable in his Adirondack. “Since you aren’t joining us for these anymore.”

“Ah, yah,” Seokjin protested, “You don’t need to do anything—”

“Don’t lie, you already love this,” Jimin cut in, all smiles despite the companion bruises and cuts on his face to Jin’s. “Although, your opinion may change in a second.”

Jungkook paused his leg bouncing to shout, “Let hyung explain!” 

You smiled as the group settled, but noticed that Jimin was looking at you strangely. You didn’t have time to process it, though, since Namjoon headed things off while a bottle rested against his chest, “Jin-hyung. We just want you to know that we’re proud of you. Even though we may not see you for awhile, you’ll be in our hearts and on our minds. Starting tomorrow, you’re already Dr. Kim to us, so I say we all call you by name tonight.”

Laughter and claps filled the air, drowning out Seokjin’s weak protests. 

Namjoon cleared his throat to calm the air, and you watched small flakes catch in his hair as he continued, “We’ll each do two things: give you advice, and ask for advice. Since you’re clearly educated, we figured you’d have a lot to say.”

“Oh, I’m just lucky.” 

“And keep sharp, everyone. Miss Photographer over there will be taking pictures.” Namjoon nodded at you, and you gave a short smile while holding up the Polaroid. You were fine doing this; behind the lens was your safe space. 

The boys and Rin slowly got through their questions and advice, and you were shocked by how insightful Seokjin was being. You never truly realized the magnitude of his intelligence. Every person around the campfire hung on his every word, and it didn’t help that you all took a swig after every good point he made - many, many times. You diligently fired away on your camera, making sure to get Seokjin with everyone so they could all have a moment captured with him. 

When Jimin’s turn came, he shot you a glance before looking at your ex. “Jin. That sounds weird to say. Jin-hyung.” He looked at the ground before continuing, and you knew it was to compose himself. “My advice to you… Sorry,” he buried his head in his elbow for a brief moment. Yoongi looked away. 

“I kinda gave you advice already,” Jimin trudged on, “And you took it. So, my next piece of advice would be to, uh, keep going.” 

You were rooted to your chair. Seokjin didn’t spare you a single glance during that exchange, but you knew it was about you. It had to be how he ended up at your door earlier. He even said Jimin was the one responsible for his wounds. 

“Thank you, Jimin,” Jin replied. “As for my advice to you, it’s okay to let people figure things out on their own. You don’t have to put it on yourself to be the one that keeps people together. If something ends up breaking, you’re going to think it’s your fault.” 

Jimin regarded him with watery eyes before nodding and wiping his freezing tears. And when he looked your way, he saw you only looking at Seokjin. Your face was slowly cracking, and the shadows in your facade were exacerbated by the flames. 

It was your turn; everyone else went. The Polaroid felt like a boulder on your thighs.

You blinked before setting the camera down and clutching your bottle. Since Seokjin was on the other side of the fire, you had to stand to see him, your tenseness on full display. 

What could you possibly say in that moment that he wanted to hear? That he was willing to listen to? You were certain you took his heart and slammed it into the ground earlier. It would be better if you just didn’t say anything. 

“Seokjin,” you started, pausing to collect yourself. “My advice to you is to forget the advice I gave you before.” 

Several pairs of eyes looked at you then. Even Jin finally regarded you, the most aware of what you were referring to.

“What I’m trying to say is: it’s okay to give up sometimes, because not everything that you want to happen is going to happen. There will be times you will just have to let things go. And that’s okay. Because maybe letting things go would end up for the best.” 

Jimin’s eyes bore into your soul. He sat so still that it put all the statues throughout history to shame. 

Seokjin grabbed his bottle with both hands, elbows resting on his knees. “Interesting advice.” His eyes danced as they took in the warm flames. “I might even follow it.” 

Both of your lungs threatened to give out at his words. Your hands almost dropped the glass you were barely clinging to, but you never looked away from Jin. It was as if your attention was chained to his body, your soul weighed down by his earlier confession and now his possible break. 

If he followed your advice, shouldn’t you be happy? It’s what you wanted in the end, right? You would let him go, and he wouldn’t look back. 

Snow drifted onto everyone’s chairs and the fire crackled in front of you. A small breath left you in a wisp of white. Warmth did its best to help you, but the cold was too strong. No amount of fire in the world could melt your icy conscience - you truly left Seokjin in the dark. He practically admitted that he loved you, and in return you gave him nothing. Of course he would consider your advice.  

“But I like the sound of not giving up. It has a ring to it that exists beyond the sound it makes when someone says it,” he cut himself off, the silence deafening. Inside, bells rang in your head. What was he implying? Seokjin’s voice was as clear as blue skies when he continued, “So, I guess I’m stealing your advice and giving it to everyone here.” 

Your gaze shifted to the side as everyone turned towards Seokjin. This was something you weren’t prepared to digest. Settling back down into your chair, you tried to even out your breathing and neutralize your shaking fingers. 

Your feelings were warring with each other in a confusing battle. If you wanted him to follow your advice, why were you relieved when he said he liked not giving up? Did that mean you hoped he still waited for you? Years and years and years from now? 

“Take it from me: don’t give up,” he advised. “But what I mean by that is to not give up until you’re happy.” 

Guilt squeezed your eyes shut, clamping your lids down. He was going to wait. Love was the one thing he wanted to be happy. And you held your love for him tightly in your hands, behind your back and hidden from sight. 

But even still, in the midst of your silent rejection, this man wasn’t letting go. Without saying the words, Seokjin was going to wait for you. Because he still loved you. 

This was too hard. 

“To being happy,” Jimin boisterously cheered, startling everyone and causing your bones to rattle. His glass remained high in the air, and everyone joined in with their own proclamations. 

“To being happy,” you whispered alongside the others, quickly taking a swig.

Yoongi was the next one to pipe up as he declared, “Okay, now that all that’s done, let’s just drink for fuck’s sake.” 

Amongst the laughter and “thank god”s thrown about, you quickly downed the rest of your drink like it was your lifeline. You needed more than liquid courage to get through the rest of the night. The camera by your feet was snatched up by Jungkook before Taehyung could get to it, and you prayed to every higher power that they kept it in one piece. 

As everyone made their way back to their rooms, you noticed Seokjin joking and laughing with the others like normal. It was a continuation of the rest of the night, since after the advice conversation it was nothing but fun. Your Polaroid almost ran out of film, for one, but watching everyone fight over the photos was entertainment in itself. There were digs toward Jin until he turned red, jabs thrown at Jimin’s fragile emotional state, and Rin’s warm laughter coating everything in a soft glow. 

And it was a bittersweet event. There was nothing more you wanted than to capture that moment and place it in a snowglobe. The world wouldn’t interfere with your friends, and none of you would ever leave. 

Seokjin was about to head up the stairs to tuck in for the night. Full of soju and stupidity, you blurted, “Leaving already?” 

He stilled before turning toward you. “Oh. Yeah.” He regarded you with a look you couldn’t completely decipher. “Long day tomorrow.” 

“Right,” you replied, hating the sudden hollowness you felt. Or didn’t feel. 

“Well… Good night.” Seokjin tapped the banister twice before heading up, and you softly wished him good night before speedwalking to your room. You were only tipsy, so the fast trip didn’t bother you. The camera in your hands kept your center balanced the whole way back.

By some strange miracle, you kept it together the whole time after everyone’s campfire speeches. You imagined yourself as an ice sculpture, surrounded by the guests of honor. Everyone gave you a glance and thought nothing else of you. They could only see composure and poise. Only when they got closer could they see you slowly melting, rivulets of remorse cascading down your entire frame.

Rin was in the middle of her skincare routine when you entered your room. As soon as she heard your footsteps, she made a noise indicating she had something to say. The product around her mouth didn’t let her yet, though. Which meant you had to wait. 

You stood in the doorframe of the bathroom, vision spinning just a smidge. This was probably a talk you didn’t want to have, but you gave your friend her podium. It was only fair. Her serious talks were few and far between. 

But she didn’t have much to say when she finished getting ready for bed. In fact, she only said three sentences. 

“It’s 11 o’clock,” she stated plainly, her tone indicating she was done with the calmer approach. Bluntness was more her style. 

“Okay?” 

“We leave at 7 in the morning.” 

“And?” 

“It means you have eight hours to decide how you’re going to feel for the next ten years.” 

Silence. 

All you could respond with was silence. 

Dead air. Sober. You were sober now. In that moment, you may have held your breath for a century. Too many thoughts flooded your brain, from past memories at a carnival to future images of an empty apartment with a bed fit for one. 

It was stark. Blank. There wasn’t going to be a future with Seokjin, no matter what you said. 

But when Rin put it that way, would you feel better if he knew the truth? Or would you keep this idiotic stance and lock your feelings away forever? 

For the third time that night, your fingers rattled. Rin took them into her comforting palms. 

“Go,” she murmured, and she smiled as she witnessed you burst into the hall. 

Your strides were incredibly long as you hurried down the corridor. The doors blurred on either side of your vision, the pattern of the floor elongated with your fast pace. Your camera thudded into your chest over and over. Step after step after step got faster and faster as your anxiousness bubbled into your brain. The last turn before the stairs made you skid, and you rushed up the rickety steps. Your heart was thrumming, scratching at your chest to set it free. 

When you got to his door, you were certain you woke sleeping neighbors with your rapid knocking. But you couldn’t stop yourself. Nothing could possibly stop you now.

You had no plan. There wasn’t time to think. All you wanted was to see him. All you could think about was letting everything out. Eight hours. You had eight hours.

Seokjin tugged the door open, pausing mid-swing when he saw your face. He looked so beautiful. Full of warmth. Like home.

“Jinnie.” 

You didn’t mean to call him that, but you didn’t take it back. You weren’t taking anything back anymore. His eyes roamed over your features multiple times, searching for any indication that this was a dream. But it wasn’t. The words finally slipped from your lips. 

“I’m not following your advice. Or my own.” 

His eyebrows furrowed, but you pushed on. 

“I’m giving up. But I’m giving up because I can’t let you go.” When Seokjin stared at you, it was impossible to look away. 

His response came out in a rush, “What are you… what are you saying?”

“I’m saying I love you.” You huffed out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. “Damn it, I— I just love you. I love you so much it hurts.” 

A shaky exhale left you at the look on his face. The quick descent into realization formed in the corners of his eyes, tears pooled at the edges before quickly streaming down his cheeks, collecting at the crux of his chin. Glassy orbs bore straight into your soul in search of answers, of truth. And if he wanted those answers, you already admitted the biggest one, so words were easier to come by.

“I’ve felt this way ever since our trip last year,” you started, slowly inching toward the wreck of a man. Not like you fared any better with the streaks forming on your own cheeks. “And I know it’s the stupidest thing to tell you now since you’re leaving, and we failed at long distance before, but--” 

Seokjin breathed out your name, and his next words would stay imprinted in your mind forever. “I still want to try. And I’ll try as many times as you’ll let me.” 

“I know. I know that now,” you whispered. 

Passion and warmth bloomed in your chest, spiraling out into the far reaches of your limbs. Hundreds of nights imagining him accepting you again didn’t prepare you for this feeling. Nothing was holding you back; your walls came crashing down. 

You finally broke and shielded your face in your hands, and you felt sturdy arms shield you from the world. The cruel, beautiful world that brought you two together right before he disappeared from your life again. You cried, and sobbed, and wheezed. The elation from his confession only magnified the pain of his departure. 

You felt the weight of the Polaroid leave your chest as Seokjin lifted it from your neck. “Come inside,” Seokjin whispered into your hair, earning a hiccup from your chest. “Please.” 

It was only then that you noticed you were still out in the hall. A small nod from you was all he needed to guide you into his room, and your throat constricted at the bags lying open on the bed. 

Seokjin was already packing. Packing while thinking he was going to go through the same thing he went through last time. You felt absolutely sick. How could you even think of doing this to him? If there was a way to make it all up to him, you would do it. “I didn’t want to tell you before,” you confessed, burying your nose into his chest. “But that was wrong of me. You almost left without knowing. I’m so sorry.” 

Strong, lean fingers traveled through your hair as your camera was placed on a table. The heavy clunk it made reached your ears, and a whisper followed. “I didn’t want to tell you, either. You don’t need to apologize.” 

“If I told you earlier, we would’ve had more time. Now I’m just sad.”  

“Look at me.” Jin caressed the back of your head, naturally lifting your gaze. His watery eyes took yours in, and he leaned forward to kiss the top of your hair. “We still have tonight, so if we’re going to be sad, let’s wait until after.” 

“But you’re crying, too,” you observed, feeling slightly better from his words. How Seokjin was able to have that effect on you, you would never understand. 

A light huff from him made you melt. “That’s because I’m so happy,” he confessed, softly laughing again and wiping his eyes with both hands. 

He was happy. Seokjin was happy. You looked at the growing smile under his fingers, and you had no choice but to grin and join in his laughter. 

Not because it was funny. But because it was unbelievable. You were able to gift him the last piece he was missing - he was finally able to find that happiness. How were you about to deny that from him? Now it seemed unfathomable.

When you looked at his hands again, you noticed there were lingering cuts. Worry washing over you, you cradled one in your palms and asked as Seokjin looked at you, “Should I take care of this, too?” Though the man had more than enough knowledge on playground injury care, you still offered because you wanted to be there for him in any possible way.

He replied instantly, “I took care of everything. Jimin, too. You saw him being his usual self earlier.” 

“He said he’d give you hell if you didn’t talk to me on this trip. I didn’t think he would go this far, though.” You reached up to run a thumb along the small gash on Seokjin’s cheek, the blood drying into a deep red. “I’ll make him regret it later.” 

Jin leaned into your touch, causing sparks in your skin. “Don’t,” he whispered, “He’s the reason I ended up at your door.” 

You just nodded and lost yourself in the feel of his soft face. It was incredibly smooth under your fingers, even better than when you held his cheeks all those years ago. To think that this man loved you ever since then, and continued to do so until now, was unbelievable. But it was true, and no amount of words could account for how you felt about that. 

Those eyes overflowing with adoration and affection were solely for you, and diving into them felt like being immersed in sunlit waters. 

“Can I kiss you?” 

The simple question took you by surprise, but you gazed at his lips. They only looked inviting, so who were you to deny him? “Please,” you sighed, and your eyelids closed shut at his pillowy touch. 

Color sprang from your heart at his confession, but heat burst from your chest at his kiss. The moment his lips met yours, every worry wrapped around your conscience snapped in two. Vines of doubt, regret, and anxiety withered under the warmth of Seokjin’s touch. It was cleansing. Powerful. Searing. 

A hand captured the back of your neck, and Jin took advantage of your gasp by dragging his tongue around the edge of your lips, a wordless plea to let him in. You gave in immediately, leaning forward and deepening the kiss, roping his tongue and eliciting a groan. 

Heat rushed between your legs and you echoed his sound with a soft moan of your own. Unwittingly, your hands found their way to Seokjin’s chest and you reveled in the feel of him under the thin material of his shirt. Without breaking your lips from his, you skirted the cotton hem with your fingers.  

Jin knew what you wanted, and his grin against your mouth only made you flush with desire. He broke from your lips to fully remove his shirt, and seeing his bare chest wiped the air from your lungs. You could only stare as you took in the lines of his solid build, wondering how the hell he had the time to achieve that look. 

Seokjin smirked at your reaction, tossing his top and hauling the bags off his bed while you were taking time to process everything. “Do I need to charge you?” 

You shook your empty head like a zombie. Your brain was currently mush, purely focused on the way his muscles rippled and slid against the confines of his skin. “No, don’t. I didn’t bring any money with me.” 

Laughter erupted from the other side of the bed. After Seokjin placed the last bag on the floor, he straightened and clarified, “I meant plug you in. You seem to be buffering over there. Low battery?”

“Shut up and get on the bed,” you teased, shrugging off the coat you still had on. You didn’t even get to change since coming in from the campfire. 

“Shut up and get on the bed, yes,” Seokjin fired back mercilessly as he sat on the comforter. He knew exactly how to push you. Even though you laughed, you made you way over to him and stood between his legs. 

You were silent then. No matter how happy you were, his departure tomorrow was weighing on you. The time you had with him was short. 

You wanted to make the most of it. Bringing your hand up to his face, you made sure to lightly skim over his gashes before mapping the rest. You wanted to ingrain every curve, every dip, every feature into memory. Every second was precious. The polaroid you had of him would still be no match for the real thing. If only you could capture the warmth of someone and keep it frozen in time.

Sure fingers clasped your hand, and Seokjin softly pulled you closer. Your first instinct was to rush in and hug him for dear life, and he immediately did the same to you, snatching the breath from your lungs and tugging tears from your ducts. You buried your face into his neck, inhaling his familiar scent and lamenting all the time you spent worrying over the smallest things. 

“We don’t have a lot of time,” Seokjin whispered, squeezing your heart. 

“I know,” you choked. You didn’t have much else to say.

“I just want to make sure we use it to do what you want.” 

You loosened your hold on him, astonished by his consideration. The growing bulge under his pants was more than screaming his wants. You felt it ever since the first kiss. But even still, he wanted to accommodate you. Your needs before his. 

It just made you fall for him even more. 

Reaching down to skim your fingers along his cock straining against his pants, you hovered your lips over his neck. “I want you,” you whispered before descending upon the smooth expanse of skin and earning a groan. 

Without warning, Seokjin tightened his arms around you. In one smooth motion, he effortlessly lifted you to straddle his thighs. You didn’t have time to think as he followed up with grabbing your head, pulling you down for another heated kiss. Your fingers latched onto his shoulders, scraping them when he thrust his tongue into your mouth. 

“Don’t do that yet,” he grunted, and you didn’t need to ask why after feeling a twitch in his jeans. 

You obeyed for the time being, cupping his neck with both hands. When you rolled your body against his, the hard feel of his stomach made you whimper. It was when you settled back on his hardness that your eyes widened. You were sure he was aching despite his silence. Maybe you could help him out a bit. “Jinnie,” you whispered, a firm hand on his chest, “Lie back for me.” 

“I love hearing that again,” Seokjin admitted through a content smile, starting a fire across your cheeks. He leaned back after giving you another peck, and you plucked yourself from his thighs to take your shoes off. 

But time was your biggest motivator to strip most of your clothes at that moment - not just your boots. Your pants were first, followed by your sweater, and finally your shirt. The whole time, Seokjin stayed propped on his elbows, watching you intently. He couldn’t hide the adoration in his eyes even if he tried. As he watched you stand there in nothing but your set, he smiled. “You’re beautiful.” 

“Thank you,” you whispered in return. “Still not as great as you, though.” You started unbuttoning his jeans before he could defend his stance, and he lifted his lower body to help you shrug them off with his underwear. When Seokjin’s thick cock sprung free, your heart jumped at the sight. It had been so long since you felt it, tasted it, rode it. Was he thinking the same? Taking his velvety length in your hand for the first time in a long time, you felt a burst of confidence at its familiarity and his response.

“Baby,” he groaned, running a hand through his hair. “Please.” 

You didn’t need another word. At the sound of the familiar pet name, you already started hovering over his cock, admiring how pretty it was before diving in. Licking around the head, you used the slick to glide your mouth far down his shaft, rolling your hand along the bottom to coat the rest. 

Seokjin jolted at the sudden pleasure, and you felt a pang in your heart. You wanted him to remember this night. And you were much more experienced than you were before, though you would only get so much time to prove your growth. 

Coming up for air, you used your hand to gather the rest of your spit and slide it down his cock, rubbing it a few times before diving down again. The stilted, garbled noises coming from your filled mouth were even getting your own underwear soaked, but they weren’t a match for Seokjin’s. His delicious grunts and moans sent you close to the edge. They were deeper than you remembered, and he wasn’t one to shy away from showing you how turned on and pleasured he was feeling.

The prominent veins of his cock were the roads along which your tongue traveled, and you made sure to love them all in between stuffing him fully in your warm mouth. He was so big, but you wanted to take every inch, tears welling in your eyes with your efforts. 

You fought through even when you felt him rock the back of your throat. Seokjin took that moment to sit up, causing tears to leak fully down your cheeks at the deeper thrust. His hands dove into your hair, but he didn’t force your head down. Instead, they tugged you off his cock, and he gazed down lovingly at your wrecked expression. Jin’s voice dipped an octave and came out coated in sin as he asked, “Can you go a little more for me, beautiful?” 

Your body tingled on instinct. You nodded and, when he smiled, you gripped his drenched dick in your fingers before descending your mouth onto his balls. Seokjin bucked his hips forward in a jolt as you grinned, lapping at his salty skin and delighting in the tremulous groans rolling down your back. Your hand squeezed the tip of his shaft before you straightened again, taking his cock captive without pause.

“Shit,” he grunted, his long fingers diving into your hair. His hands still didn’t push you down further, oddly, so you took the initiative and plunged down yourself. 

The feel of his cock in your mouth was so familiar. It was almost second nature how easily you sucked him off, knowing when to hollow your cheeks and pull him further down the abyss of ecstasy. When to sink further and hum, ripping a delicious sound from his throat. Even when to bob and swirl your head around, effectively shutting down his ability to function. 

It was then that you chose to really bring it home. You breathed through your nose as you took more and more of him in, even after you couldn’t breathe anymore. You felt your nose hit this pubic bone, and the long moan you got from Seokjin was worth the burn in your throat. His fingers tightened around your head, but when you came up gasping for air he didn’t stop you. 

“Come here,” is all he said, tugging you up to straddle him again. A trail of saliva swung from your lips as you came up, but you paid it no mind. If anything, it added to the building lust inside your bones. Your panties were absolutely drenched by now, so dragging your core along Seokjin’s cock caused both of you to twinge. “Fuck,” he gasped, fueling your heat. 

“Jinnie, please,” you whimpered, your voice hoarse. You wanted everything from him at once. You were getting impatient, and the overwhelming time pressure was stressing you the hell out. “I need you, please.” 

Suddenly, everything stopped as Seokjin cradled your chin and swiped the spit from your lips. “You have me,” he assured you. “You have all of me.” He kissed your nose. “And you’ll have me for a very long time.” 

Relenting, you leaned into his touch. “Now is what I’m concerned about.” 

“I know,” he agreed before kissing you again. “I just wanted you to know the rest.” 

“Okay,” you whispered before capturing his full lips with your own. When you felt him wrapping his arms around you, your heart leaped into your throat. When you felt him shift the both of you to lower you onto the bed, you already knew fresh tears were waiting behind your eyes. 

With great care, Jin slipped your underwear off your smooth legs. Your bra was deftly unhooked next - not without an eyebrow raise from you and a wink from him - and tossed from the bed. 

Staring at your naked form, Seokjin appeared completely lost in thought. It got to the point where you felt like covering yourself, but when you attempted to he swiftly denied any insecurity. “Don’t keep this from me,” he whispered. “I want to remember everything.” 

You kept it together until then. Something in you broke and you softly choked on a cry. So he was thinking the same as you. This was the last night for a long time. 

Starting from your shoulder, he kissed his way down along your neck, your collarbone, your chest. Taking one breast in one hand, he swirled his tongue around the nipple of the other. You gasped from the sudden burst of pleasure, which made Seokjin repeat the motion on the other side. He then lightly sucked on the nipple, releasing it with a small pop. 

You wanted to close your eyes and lose yourself in the waves of pleasure he was giving you, making his way down your body. But you wanted to relive this night again and again. So you had to keep your eyes on him. Only him. His mouth’s searing heat as it kissed along your stomach, and the stark cold left behind when he moved on. His soft touch as he gently pried your legs open, and dark, lust-filled eyes as he stared at your dripping entrance. You wanted to remember the way he kissed along your legs, nipping in some places to make you gasp. The way his beautiful lips connected with your heat in a reverent kiss before his tongue explored inside. Each flick of his tongue, squeeze of his fingers on your legs, noise from his lips. How you loved him through every second of him worshipping you. 

As soon as he brought his fingers up to caress your folds while sucking on your clit, you had to stop him. It was too much. You wanted to feel him when you broke. 

Seokjin wordlessly obeyed as he crawled above you. You pulled him down for a kiss, not caring how he tasted. Your hands then went to his shoulders as he positioned himself at your entrance. 

“Are you still…” 

“Yes,” you nodded, touched that he remembered. “I’m still on it.” 

“Okay.” He swooped down to capture your lips, and when you clenched your fingers around his shoulders, he grunted. “Are you okay to take it all?” 

“Go slow. For now,” you said, earning a nod. “It’s been awhile.”

Seokjin’s gaze was heavy as he prepared himself. “Same.” 

At the initial push, you whooshed out a gasp. It had been way too long since you’d been with someone. The intrusion indeed hurt. Maybe you should have let him prep you more, in hindsight. But Seokjin was nothing but tender as he waited for you to adjust. Once you were okay, he steadily pushed out and in again, going deeper. Slowly but surely, you were able to fully take him in. 

And the feel of him completely inside you was nothing like you’ve felt before. It was comfort. It was home. It was a perfect fit, and you wanted to stay like that forever. 

“God,” Seokjin groaned, “I don’t want to leave this room.” 

You chuckled, rolling your hips. “Hmm, pussy or Harvard. That’s a pretty tough one.” 

“If it’s yours, Harvard can wait,” Seokjin grunted before sending your thoughts spiraling with a huge thrust. You outright whined at him, but he pulled out only to spear you again with one long motion. “You still like it rough, baby?” 

Chills cascaded down your spine and pooled at the apex of your toes. This was the Seokjin you were waiting for. You wondered if he was still into that after witnessing everything he was doing for you beforehand. But oh, were you ready for the pivot. “Fuck, yes,” you moaned. “You know I do.” 

“You still have your word?” 

“Carousel, yes.” 

“Good girl.” That was all Seokjin needed. Grabbing the top of the headboard behind you, he launched into a rough and relentless pace that had you seeing stars. You felt so full, yet so weightless as you let your body go limp. The feel of Seokjin’s cock slamming into you repeatedly would continue to exist for months after tonight, the ridges of it sliding along your walls never forgotten entirely. You needed as much as he could give, and he knew that. 

Gripping one of your legs, he hauled it over his sweat-slicked shoulder and tilted himself to reach a deeper position, twisting his reddened face to plant kisses on your ankle. Mewl after mewl tumbled from your lips at the deep thrusts. 

“Touch yourself for me, baby,” Jin commanded while still pounding into you, and you wouldn’t dream of disobeying. Your fingers went straight for your jiggling breasts, teasing your nipples and tugging them for his blown out eyes. You moaned, and smirked when you saw Seokjin beginning to lose himself. 

His tell was his scrunched eyebrows, and his eyes shifting down to watch his cock ram into your tight cunt. You still knew, after years. 

You fell into complete ecstasy when he reached down with his free hand to rub your clit between your bodies, loving the way the veins in his arms protruded. Imagining licking along them all made you moan. And you didn’t care if the people around you heard. All of your mewls, moans, whines - they were all for Jin. He could have all of you again and again.  

After one particularly deep thrust, he tugged his cock out, leaving your walls fluttering around an agonizing emptiness. “Turn around. On your knees.” 

“Holy fuck, yes,” you rasped. He wasn’t letting the night go to waste at all. 

Before you even assumed the next position, you felt a hand come down on your ass. The smack jolted you forward in pain, with pleasure settling in its wake. 

“So pretty,” Seokjin whispered, ghosting his hand over the spot he spanked. He gave it another smack before gripping your ass cheeks apart. You assumed he was roving his eyes over your drenched core. “And still so wet.” 

“Just for you,” you affirmed. 

“Just for me,” he repeated before adjusting his knees on the bed to get closer. “But you might be too loud tonight, baby. I’m going to need silence from you this time.” 

Shit. You were never, ever good at this part. But you nodded. What you weren’t expecting right away was the initial stroke to be rough, right down to the hilt. You cried out immediately, earning you a harsh spank. 

Seokjin’s sudden laugh made you chuckle in embarrassment. He breathily joked, “Out of practice?” 

“Something like that,” you admitted, your elbows and grin lost in the sheets. “I’m rusty.” 

“Okay, let’s just do this then.” Jin leaned forward, stretching over you. You groaned at the feel of his solid chest on your soft back, your eyes rolling into your head feeling him completely mold into you for a moment. He got a fluffy pillow from the other side of the bed and let your head rest on it. “Can you bite this for me, my love?” 

The new name spread wildfire across your face. “Yes. That I can do,” you assured him. When you had the material securely in your mouth, you nodded to signal he could continue. 

“Good girl.” And continue Seokjin did. He went right back into the dominant Jin he loved being, and the one you loved being with. There was no mercy in his thrusts, stroke after stroke after stroke. If you lifted your back a little or lowered your butt, he smacked your supple flesh and corrected you instantly. “Ass up, baby.” 

With Jin’s relentless pace, your body went limp and hung on by a thread. Loosening up allowed for even more of his cock, and your muffled moans started getting louder the closer and closer you got to the edge. You could feel your core tightening, threatening to unleash the pent up tension. 

“That’s it, beautiful,” Seokjin praised, feeling your walls squeeze around him. “Do you want to come like this?”

You hastily shook your head. You wanted to see him when you came. And if you remembered correctly, he loved seeing your face when it happened, as well.

“Too bad,” he chuckled darkly, and you almost came undone right then. “Guess you’ll have to come again the way you want to later.” Reaching under you, he toyed with your clit as he kept the pace from behind. 

You let go of the pillowcase as you kicked your head back in a moan, your saliva trail slowly gravitating toward the sheets. Seokjin only let you breathe for a second before pushing your head back down into the thin material. “Make noise again and you won’t come at all.”

Fuck. You bit hard into the pillow, tears forming at the corners of your eyes as you felt yourself losing control. His fingers felt divine on your bundle of nerves, his dick sliding through your folds over and over and over. The hand he placed on your head smoothed over your hair before bunching it and tugging. You reared back, dots swimming in your vision. “God, I want to choke you. Can I do that, my love?” 

You released the pillow from your mouth again. His consideration was top notch tonight. Too much? You couldn’t decide or really care. “Yes, just do it. Do anything. Please. I’m so close.” 

“Mm. Then cover your mouth.” Before you could follow his command, Seokjin pulled you up by a shoulder to be flush against his front. Sweat coated your back and your ass, causing you to slide down his chiseled stomach while speared on his cock. A strong hand wrapped around your throat, and the fingers that were teasing your clit mercilessly now ventured into the front of your folds. 

One of your hands shot up to clamp over your mouth right before you let out a long groan. You loved when he took control, and when he lost control. If both happened at the same time, it was heaven. 

You could barely last on your knees as his dick slammed up into you repeatedly. The hand around your airway was tight but only just, his praises in your ear being the real culprit of your stolen breath. Your pussy clenched harshly around his length, and you knew from the tight coil in your body that you were seconds from euphoria. 

Seokjin felt it instantly. “Come, baby.” And as soon as he relinquished your throat did you give in, waves of pleasure coursing through you and a white burn shimmering in your lungs. It seemed endless. Ripple after ripple thrummed through your body, your joints slowly unlocking from their initial freeze. Behind you, Seokjin groaned and sang sweet nothings in your ear, his arms wrapping around your chest in a scorching embrace. 

The high ebbed, but did not completely recede. You knew Jin still needed release, so you kissed his wrist next to your shoulder and whispered, “I want to see you now.”

“Whatever you need.” Seokjin slowly unsheathed himself, and you felt a slight pain. You watched as he positioned his back on the headboard. He knew what you wanted to do. 

You made your way over to him and hovered over his length. Locking your hazy eyes with his dark set, you kissed him lazily as you languidly sank back onto him. Seokjin groaned when you didn’t use your hand as a guide beforehand. And frankly, that turned you on, too.

“You’re so tight still,” he grunted, his hands coming up and grabbing your ass before settling on your hips. 

You rolled your hips before finding a rhythm. “You’re just big,” you mock complained, earning a deep chuckle. 

“Aww. You sound. So. Sad,” he teased, thrusting up into you to punctuate each word. Your mewls were welcome now since he was done with his role. Now he could just sit back and enjoy your show for him. And occasionally torture you. 

You found your rhythm again, rougher with him now with your hands in his dark, sweaty locks. One of your hands dropped onto his chest and raked down his breast, eliciting a higher moan than normal. 

The sound caused heat to pool between your legs again, and you upped the pace. Your thighs burned from the exertion, but you kept yourself distracted by diving into Jin’s neck and nipping in multiple places. His arms left your hips to wrap around your back, and your breath faltered as he took over again. 

Seokjin was close. He was always close when his limbs locked hard into place. His upward thrusts were fast and hard, and you could only moan in his ear and take him in. The coil that released once tonight was tightening again, and you murmured in his ear that you were close. 

Seokjin only needed to kiss you like his life depended on it for you to unravel again. The wave was weaker than last time, but it could still cover mountains. Your head felt light, dancing above the clouds with no intention of coming down. You pushed yourself from his lips, allowing him to see your flushed chest and reddened cheeks. The second orgasm faded and loosened your limbs, but your heart felt completely connected to his, your soul nestled into the comfort of his tender embrace. “I love you,” you sighed, and you immediately felt a huge twitch between your folds.

“Lie down, baby. I’m close.” 

“It’s okay,” you whispered, cradling his cheek. “Come inside me, Jinnie. I wanna feel you.” 

“Shit,” he grunted. His thrusts descended into madness. Your heart rattled at the sight of his dusted red cheeks, sweaty neck, heaving chest. He was the most beautiful man you’d ever seen, and the one you would overturn stars to find should you ever lose him again. 

When he gazed down at your joined sex, you took in the wet strands of hair on his forehead. When he kicked his head back against the headboard to look at you with lidded eyes, you bit your swollen lips. This wonderful man was your lover, your ex, your friend, and now your lover again. Only this time, you truly loved him back. And you wanted to think back to this moment forever. 

Tears sprung into your eyes as he pulled you in for a searing kiss, and his orgasm released into you in spurts. The thrusts he made then were slow and powerful, and your body bobbed with the swells. You kissed him harder than necessary, almost willing to bruise your own lips on his. The longer you held his lips captive, the longer he couldn’t see your sorrow. 

But Seokjin already felt the drops ping his chest. He just let you cry because that’s what you needed. Even when he broke from the kiss, he never said a word. He trailed kisses along your wet cheeks, your sweaty nose, and your glistening forehead. His poignant visage held nothing but stars, and it reminded you of the night you fell in love, crushing your spirit ever more. 

Touch after touch after touch only coaxed more tears from your eyes. It felt never ending as you sat spent in his lap, still on his softening length. Sheer willpower was what caused you to finally speak, your voice hoarse, “We should clean up. You still need to pack and sleep.”

“We should, and I do,” he whispered. He patted your bum. “Can you get up by yourself?” 

You nodded before extracting yourself from his firm thighs, lamenting the fact that human bodies had limits. As you waddled to the bathroom, you stumbled along the way, Seokjin softly chuckled while following you and steadying you when needed. Even when you shot empty glares at him, the smile in his eyes never left. 

The rest of your time spent in his room consisted of silence and kisses. Ever the gentleman, he let you lie down on his bed while he used the other half for the bags to pack. It didn’t take him too long since he was organized from the jump, so when he was done he cleared the bed and joined you under the covers. When you felt a weight on your stomach, you looked down to see your camera dumped on the comforter. 

Seokjin wrapped a strong arm behind your neck. “What do you call naked pictures taken with a Polaroid?” 

“Oh, no.” You turned your head to face him. “What?” 

“Just pictures. But that’s old nudes.” 

You punished him by attacking his sides instantly, yanking a batch of honky laughs from him. Knowing your own weaknesses still, he unleashed his own parry, and it took a minute for the both of you to settle in a draw. 

“Don’t tell me the only reason you brought this into the bed was to tell that horrid joke,” you chuckled, your head back to resting in your pillow. 

“Nope. I wanna take one of us.” 

After getting past all seven of your objections and excuses, Seokjin whittled your walls down and got you to agree. The end product existed on the last film in your Polaroid: a crooked snapshot of him kissing your cheek as you smiled with creased eyes, sheets held against your chest. And he conceded in letting you keep it after watching you clutch it lovingly in your fingers. 

You immediately sought comfort in his embrace after setting the photo next to your phone on the nightstand, and he stole multiple kisses from you way after your eyes couldn’t stay open any longer. 

“Get some sleep, my love,” Seokjin whispered. 

And despite your sound of protest, you were pulled into the abyss of sleep right as you felt pillowy lips caress your forehead.

Rin-Rin [6:40am]: You’re lucky I love you. I packed your stuff and left out an outfit for you when you come down. Just don’t be late or I’ll drag you back down myself :)))

Jiminie [6:45am]: RISE N SHINE LOVEBIRDS

Rin-Rin [6:46am]: Oh, yeah, I may or may not have texted Jimin. 

Jiminie [6:46am]: ABOUT TIME

Jiminie [6:46am]: !!!

Tae [6:47am]: jimins scream woke me up. i can only assume that means ill get to be an uncle soon. dont let me down i want this(: 

Joonie [6:48am]: Aaaaaaaaaa !!!

Jiminie [6:48am]: And I know you want to yell at me for yesterday so I am ready for that whenever you are

Kook [6:50am]: <3 

You smiled at your texts before locking your phone. Seokjin was already up and about, making sure everything was packed and accounted for. When he saw you stirring, he came over and surprised you with a kiss so deep that it revitalized your sagging emotional state. “Morning,” you chuckled, swinging your sore legs out of the sheets and wincing at the cold. “I need to head back down.”

“Yeah, Rin already sent the first round of threats. I’ll see you at the car, okay?” 

You pecked him on the cheek after you slipped on your boots and grabbed your Polaroid.  Stepping into the hallway, you kept reminding yourself to not completely lose it yet. There was still a whole car ride you got to have with him, and you were determined to slow down time however you could. 

Your phone buzzed again, and you assumed Yoongi and Hoseok were just now waking up and getting the gossip. Checking your notifications only validated your guess.

Hobi [6:52am]: AHHHHH HAPPY FOR U~!!!

Hobi [6:52am]: ASLSKDJSKDHSKDJ

Yoongi [6:53am]: I’ll make sure to drag him back sometimes. It’s ludicrous to say that we’d never see him again. Drama queen. Anyways, happy for you. If you need anything, let me know. 

Hobi [6:53am]: we’ll see seokjinnie again love. and if u miss him a lot then we can make sure you see him. im sure he’ll be missing u too

How you were able to win the friend lottery and meet these people, you had no clue. But you weren’t going to ever question the fact. All you would do was embrace your blessings and love them. 

The car ride to the airport was long, but still much too short for your liking. Between the loving gazes you directed at Seokjin as he sang along to Taehyung’s music, the looks full of mirth Jimin gave the both of you from the backseat, and the laughter of both Rin and Taehyung, you were the happiest you’ve felt in a very long time. 

Throughout the ride, you got the feeling that you were going to be okay. Seokjin was starting an insane adventure, but you were also going to be there every step of the way. Not just on the polaroid he decided to stash in his bag, but in his heart and on his mind like Namjoon said around the fire. 

There were still plenty of ways to see each other and communicate. And since he technically didn’t start until next summer, that gave you plenty of time to see him before then. The many possibilities made you question your hesitation in the first place. 

But none of that diminished how much of a struggle it was still going to be. 

When the car rolled to a stop in the airport parking lot, your chest constricted. When everyone got their bags out of the cars and started the trek to the shuttles, your hands shook on your straps. As soon as everyone started saying their byes and separating to check into their airlines, you found it hard to breathe. 

But a tender hand brushed through your hair, and plush lips connected with your forehead. In an instant, you felt okay again. 

Seokjin’s calm voice slipped over your features. “Your flight leaves in two hours, right?” When you nodded, he continued, “Okay. Come shop with me before I have to go to my gate!” 

You tried your best to keep a positive attitude while you watched Jin peruse different airport stores. When he would hold stuff up for you to approve, you would smile or dramatically turn things down. Even the cute neck pillow he really wanted got the dreaded rejection. 

But that was only so you could pay for it when he wasn’t looking and surprise him. The huge laugh and grin you got in return was worth the trouble. 

When it was time for Seokjin to head to his gate, you brought him in for a crushing hug. “Let me know when you land,” you demanded. 

“Of course, honey,” he said through a smile. 

“‘Honey,’ now?” You regarded him with a raised eyebrow. “You have so many nicknames for me. I can’t keep up. Do you have a favorite you could stick with?” 

Seokjin rested his chin on your head. “Ah, I have a favorite. But it’s not true yet, so I shouldn’t use it.” 

A fire ignited in your heart, the flames warming you from the inside. “And which one is that?” 

“Would you look at the time!” Jin’s body heat left you in a rush as he stepped away, and your instinctual pout made him laugh outright. He cupped your chin for a kiss that rocked your whole being before pulling away. His eyes held galaxies in them when he stared into yours. “Guess you’ll have to wait for the answer to that one.” 

“You’re a jerk, Jinnie,” you huffed, but you kissed him again. “You’re lucky I love you.” 

“I really am. And I love you,” he responded. His hand came down to squeeze yours before he had to part. “I’ll let you know when I make it. Call me when you get home, okay?” 

“Okay,” you replied, and you watched his long strides with a heavy heart and a hopeful mind. 

As you told yourself again and again, you were going to be okay. It was going to be tough, it was going to be absolutely painful. But as long as you decided to keep loving each other, everything would work out. 

You knew better than anyone that love was a choice. And for Seokjin, you would choose it a thousand times over. 

And besides, the current state of technology was on your side. The possibilities of communication were too endless for you to dwell on the distance. Were there going to be days in which you only received one text? Most likely. Were there going to be weeks where you weren’t going to hear much from Seokjin at all? Definitely. But this time, unlike last time, you welcomed every bit of it. Your heart built a bridge to his that defied any sense of physical distance. On opposite sides, both of you were achieving success in your own ways. In the end, you would always come back to each other to celebrate together. Even though this was the last November trip you had with Seokjin, it was the beginning of many, many wonderful years to come.

It was later, while you were waiting for your own flight to finish boarding, that a message was sent to your phone. 

Jinnie [12:04pm]: Attachment: 1 Image

You couldn’t help but grin. As you gazed lovingly at the picture of Seokjin smiling next to your polaroid, another one came in before you could respond.

Jinnie [12:05pm]: Until you’re really next to me, this will have to do. Don’t get too jealous! 

You laughed to yourself, rolling your eyes while setting the image as your wallpaper. Locking your phone, you tapped the glass to see your screen light up, observing the picture again.

On a plane heading to another city entirely, Seokjin was doing the exact same thing. Except in his case, he was smiling down at a girl caught in mid-laughter, body aglow from the bright yellow lights of a spinning carousel behind her. 

-

-

-

a/n: whewww so if you made it to the end, hi! i seriously enjoyed writing this and i learned so much. it’s my first fic and first huge one-shot, so if you have any comments/concerns/constructive feedback, please let me know! my ask box is always open, too. lastly, here is my m.list if you want to browse! 🌨🌨🌨 ++ feedback box (added nov. 25th, 2021): ⇥ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated! ⇥ for the ones that aren’t okay with reblogging with a review, commenting on this, or sending a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think! ⇥ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. it’s literally just a feedback dropbox :D ⇥ here!   ++ ⇥ masterlist 

[delicrieux]

—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 

queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

[lucysweatslove]

09.13.2022 // 🤷🏻‍♀️

Does a workout ever make you feel worse? I was feeling alright today after physical therapy (first 5 exercises logged in Fitbod), good actually. I hate the modified split squats, and basically everything ended up targeting my hips, but I didn’t get super dizzy, only a little bit, and we started preparing for deads again by doing the mechanics with a dowel. Found that i don’t experience pain if I reduce my range of motion. So overall I felt positive about that.

Since I didn’t work today, I kinda had time to just sit around with my thoughts. I didn’t want to wait to do my usual workout, since not doing anything major was, well, majorly boring. I got on the spin bike and put the resistance back down and just did something light. Afterwards it took some motivation to get going on strength training, and honestly I felt like I was just dragging the entire time. I think my muscles were somewhat fatigued from the split squats and resistance band hip circle type things.

Somehow I got it in my mind that I’d enjoy a nice stretch. But Down Dog gave me some poses that I just don’t like- anything that shifts weight into my arms aren’t my favorite especially the day after arm day- and I think that soured my mood.

After my workout I started to feel dizzy and light headed. Of course my vision started to wobble. It reminded me too much of Old Times where I would let my blood sugar get way too low by exercising way too much on very little intake. So I got myself a bowl of cereal with a banana and raspberries for more simple carbs.

I’m still not feeling great. Both physically (it’s getting better as I sit) and emotionally. I’m thinking maybe adding yoga just isn’t a good idea yet. I feel way too weak, the negative body talk starts, and it’s not longer restorative. I really want to further work on my flexibility, but perhaps I should just stick to a simple stretching routine instead of using my app.

[shorterstrides-fasterpace]

Good morning, and Happy February!!!

Kept it quick this morning on account of needing to do laundry and dishes before work. I am here forth discontinuing the 30 day challenges. They ramp us reps far fast than it is safe for me to to, and doing less reps leaves me feeling defeated. Instead I will be just working on my pushups/sit-ups/squats. I also realized I am on the last week of the last round of splits training for my splits app!! Deeply leaning towards replacing my splits training with yoga. @geneticallymodifiednerd suggested the app Downdog and I think I am finally in the right mind set to attempt yoga seriously. I am excited!!

@runningfromthecuccos @evolutionofatype2fitblr got those 50 rep in for Half Punch February!!! How are you doing???

[echoes-of-the-clockwork]

Book One: Gold (Prompto x Reader) Chapter VIII

Prompto placed one of his hands on the back of her neck, holding her in place as he basked in the softness of her lips. When she didn't push him away, he deepened the kiss. However, he snapped out of his blissful revere a few seconds later and immediately pulled away. He stumbled backwards, realizing he'd push himself on to her. "I-I-I..." Prompto tripped over his own feet and landed on his butt. He sat up, running his hands frantically through his blonde locks. "Six, why did I do that?! I-I'm so sorry, (Y/n)!"

The girl stood up and approached him. She squatted down in front of him, smiling. "Calm down. There's no need to apologize, Prom." She took his hands out of his hair and held them gently with hers. "I do want to know... What did that kiss mean?"

"W-Well..." Prompto casted his gaze to the ground, unable to look her in the eye. He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down so he could say those three important words. He grasped her hands, exhaling with a shaky sigh. "For a long time, I've...I've really liked you. More than a friend. You've been there for me through thick and thin. You never gave up on me and you're still by side even now. I mean, I have Noct and the others, but they aren't you. I know I haven't been the easiest person to live with all these years, but I-I'm glad you've decided to stick around. I haven't had the easiest life, but you made every moment worth while. You're irreplaceable to me. I...I love you, (Y/n)."

(Y/n) clung to every word, taking each one to heart. She remembered every memory she's made with Prompto, cherishing them all. She may have been bound to him because of her status as his guardian, but those memories were made because she cares deeply about him and was infatuated with him. Even if she wasn't his guardian, she would still dedicate herself to him because of how much she cares for him. He too was irreplaceable.

The girl smiled warmly at Prompto. "You've made my life worth while, as well. I cherish every second we've been together and wouldn't trade them for the world. For the longest time, I convinced myself that you were a human and someone who deserved better than me. But still, I found myself falling for you as the days passed. I'm so happy you feel the same way. I love you too, Prompto."

Tears of joy sprang from Prompto's eyes. He grabbed (Y/n)'s hands and tugged her towards him. She lost her balance and fell against him just as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. He embraced her tightly, burying his face into the crook of her neck and thanking her for loving him over and over again. She placed her hands on his back, trailing her fingers up and down his spine.

(Y/n) pulled away just enough to move her hands from Prompto's back to his cheeks. Sitting on her knees between his legs, she cupped his cheeks in her palms and used her thumbs to wipe away his tears. Smiling, she leans forward and presses her forehead against his. Her golden eyes darted down to his lips for a split second before locking with his cerulean ones. She didn't hesitate to lean in closer and press her lips against his, kissing him sweetly.

It was a brief yet intoxicating kiss. (Y/n) pulled away a few seconds later after noticing the many questionable stares they were receiving from bystanders. She got to her feet, offering to help Prompto off the ground. When he placed his hands in hers, she pulled him to his feet with a smile. "As much as I would love to continue this, we have to meet up with the others. Ready to go?"

Prompto nodded, smiling. "Yeah."

The duo walked down the road a little ways away from the Cauthess Rest Area. (Y/n) transformed and Prompto climbed onto her back. He pulled out his phone and checked Ignis' directions, sharing them with the guardian. Knowing they had just ate, the fox gently trotted in the direction of Aracheole Stronghold. She refused to use the roads in order to prevent another ambush like yesterday. They ran into many packs of voretooths and sabertusks while traveling through nature, but they fled at the sight of the spirit.

Once arriving at Sothmocke Haven, Prompto sighed in relief when seeing the others were safe. He slid off (Y/n)'s back and ran towards his friends. The fox reverted back to her human form, joining the blonde.

"So, what'd we miss?" Prompto asked.

"Besides a talking daemon and other two runestones, nothing much," Noctis shrugged his shoulders. "What about you guys?" He glanced between his best friend and guardian.

"We kicked some imperial ass! Well, only some. There were way too many to handle by ourselves." Prompto slung an arm over the girl's shoulders and pulled her into his side. "(Y/n)'s the reason why we were able to escape without so much as a scratch."

"What took you both so long to get here, then?" Gladio inquired.

"We were hiding from the empire and Prompto's phone was water-logged from the storm," (Y/n) answered. "We didn't see the messages until a couple hours ago."

"We are simply relieved you both are unscathed," Ignis said.

"The same goes for the rest of you. We were worried there for a little bit." The (h/c)-haired girl, once Prompto released her, turned around to face the stronghold. "So, what's the plan?"

"We were just about to discuss such matters."

Noctis, who was sitting in one of the chairs beside Gladio, looks up at his advisor. "So, any bright ideas, Ignis?"

"A dark one, as it were," Ignis stated. "A frontal assault would leave us exposed. But, if we move under cover of night, we might be able to infiltrate the base unnoticed."

"And until then?"

"We learn all we can about the base's design and narrow down the Regalia's location. I'll analyze what intelligence we have available to find us a way in."

Noctis nodded. "Sounds good, Specs."

"All right! We're gonna get our wheels back!" Prompto cheered as he sat down in the chair beside Noctis. "Guess we gotta wait for night fall now." He pulled out his phone and booted up the King's Knight app. While waiting for it to load, his eyes drifted upward. They locked on to (Y/n)'s back and watched her every moment as she offered to help Ignis.

Noctis caught the blonde staring at the girl with a joyous smile etched across his face. "Did...something happen between you two?"

When Prompto realized he was talking to him, he did his best to look everywhere but at (Y/n). "Why would you think that?"

"Besides the fact you're staring at her, no idea."

The sharpshooter lowered his phone, knowing he couldn't hide the truth from his best friend. "I...may have told her how I feel."

Gladio, who'd been eavesdropping, spoke up. "Guessing by the look on your face, it went well."

Prompto sighed dreamily. "It went better than well. It went perfect."

"Who knew you had it in you, string bean."

The younger boy rolled his eyes with a groan at the ridiculous nickname. He looked back down at his phone and saw the game finished loading. He focused his eyes on the screen, but his mind was reminiscing in the kisses he shared with (Y/n) only a couple hours ago. His cheeks were dusted with a light tinge of pink as he played King's Knight until it was time for them to infiltrate the stronghold.

The group left Sothmocke Haven and made their way towards one of cargo entrances located on the side of Aracheole Stronghold. They snuck through rows of storage containers until arriving just outside the cargo entrance. Two soldiers were patrolling the road and inspecting the outgoing cargo. While hiding behind two storage containers, Ignis instructed Noctis when to kill the soldiers. Warp-striking each one, he killed the enemies without alerting the stronghold.

With the way clear, they walk through the cargo entrance. They quickly duck behind stacks of boxes and storage containers when spotting the search lights located on the ramparts. They ducked their heads lower as a MA-X Maniple marched directly towards them with its headlight pointed directly at the cargo they were concealing themselves with. Holding their breaths, they patiently waited for the mech to pass by their hiding spot. It turned to their right, strolling away.

"It's gone," Noctis sighed, relieved it didn't spot them.

"Magitek armor," Ignis whispered.

"Don't wanna mess with one of those," Gladio commented.

"We shouldn't have to if we keep to the shadows." Ignis led the group through the rows of cargo in the direction the mech walked in. Three more soldiers sauntered by, which didn't go unnoticed by the group. Noctis times their movements before warp-striking and killing them one by one.

Now the way was clear. They made their way over to a gate located beside a deactivated MA-X Maniple. Noctis deactivated the barrier keeping them from going any further. While the boys continued forward and ran into another group of soldiers, (Y/n) climbed up a stack of storage containers and stalked the enemies' movements from above. She watched Noctis closely as he managed to take down four of the six soldiers patrolling the area.

The girl snuck across the top of the metal storage containers until she reached the second gate. She glanced over the top and spotted the Regalia not too far away. Her attention was redirected back to the prince when he alerted the last soldier by killing the other one. Before the adversary could raise his gun and shoot Noctis, she manifested a dagger made of pure flames and leapt down on top of the soldier. She jammed the fiery blade into his back, killing him instantly. The dagger vaporized as she stepped away from the soldier's corpse.

Noctis glanced behind him before looking back at her. "Where did you...?"

"Nice save," Gladio complimented, the raven-haired boy's question going unanswered.

"Aw, yeah! That's my girl!" Prompto chanted.

"Well done, (Y/n)," Ignis said.

"The Regalia is just through this gate," she said before turning to the panel and deactivating the translucent barrier. They walk into the next area and immediately spot the car they'd been searching for. However, they were spotted by a MA-X Maniple. As the mech rose to its feet and set its sight on the group, soldiers and magiteks encroached on their position. All the search lights were aimed at them, revealing them in the darkness.

(Y/n) transformed and leapt onto the mech while the boys dealt with the soldiers and MTs. She latched on to one of the missile cannons attached to its shoulders. She growled menacingly as her fangs sunk deeper into the machine's metal exterior. Shaking her head, she managed to tear the missile cannon from the MA-X Maniple and toss it aside. She jumped off its body, using her weight to knock it down to a single knee.

Prompto and Ignis dealt heavy damage to the mech after seeing it had collapsed. Noctis and Gladio kept their attention on the soldiers and MTs trying to surround them. Vaulting a safe distance away from the battle, the fox spirit concentrated her energy into her tails and paws. They ignited with bright flames and she rejoined the fray. She charged through a horde of soldiers and MTs, using her blazing paws and tails to swipe and them left and right.

Noctis saw the others were handling the enemies and decided to take it upon himself to warp up to the watchtower. Using the turret located at the top, he targeted the energy tanks. Explosions shook the ground as the tanks blew up one by one, taking enemies with them. When all the tanks, the MA-X Maniple, soldiers, and magiteks were annihilated, Noctis returned to his friends. Discussing their next target, they headed towards the magitek generator located in the rear of the stronghold.

The sun was beginning to rise. (Y/n), still in her spiritual form, split off from the boys to deal with the overwhelming amount of enemies swarming from all directions. She dealt with them while the others headed straight for the generator. She fought against more soldiers, MTs, and MA Veles-Bises, keeping them at bay for a short time before destroying them. She went to rendezvous with the others when her attention was drawn to the magitek generator. It had been destroyed and weakened the entire garrison.

Running as fast as she could, (Y/n) searched for the boys just as Noctis summoned the mighty Fulgurian, Ramuh. She stopped in her tracks, her slitted eyes traveling up to the sky when seeing the Astral appear. She watched in silence and awe as the god used his power to annihilate the remaining enemies in Aracheole Stronghold. Before Ramuh vanished, she could've sworn he glanced at her.

When the god was gone, (Y/n)'s ears perked up when she sensed a strange presence in the distance. Her golden eyes scanned her surroundings when the presence was slowly moving toward the direction of the Regalia. Instead of pursing the person, she used her connection to the gemstone on Prompto's bracelet to find the boys' current location. What caused her fur to stand on end was both their presence and the stranger's were closing in on each other. She couldn't understand why she could sense the stranger's aura without needing a connection. Pushing the thought aside, she made her way back to the Regalia.

The moment the guardian caught a glimpse of the car in the distance, she saw Noctis, Prompto, Gladio, and Ignis were being approached by a man with a sword drawn she'd never seen before. With her sensitive hearing, she listened in on their conversation while keeping her distance.

"Long has it been, Noctis," Ravus, the man who she detected earlier, hissed.

"Ravus," Noctis growled.

"You receive the Storm's blessing. And yet, you know nothing of the consequences." Ravus raises his sword and points the sharp tip at Noctis's throat.

Gladio was enraged at the sight. "Watch it." He moves to get between them, causing Ravus to reposition the blade with its edge now along Gladio's throat.

Ignis starts to move toward Ravus, but the other man raises his left hand. "Be still. All of you," the man warned.

"Not good..." Prompto muttered.

"Heir to a crown befitting no other. Witness his splendor and glory. All hail the Chosen King."

Noctis, although being threatened by Ravus, stood his ground and snapped back. "Awful high and mighty for an imperial rat, serving the enemy to hunt down Luna!"

Ravus suddenly grabs Noctis' throat with his left hand. "I do not serve. I command!" He shoves the boy backward and Gladio gets between them. The high commander glared at the brute. "The king's sworn shield."

"You better believe it," Gladio snarled.

"A weak shield protects naught." Ravus slowly raises his sword above his head, then brings it down fiercely. Gladio briefly blocks it with his own sword before Ravus parries the weapon away and slams the pommel of his sword into the shield's chest, sending him flying into the side of the Regalia. Prompto runs to check on Gladio while Noctis gets between them and Ravus.

"Wanna go? Let's do it," Noctis remarked in a low, threatening tone. He summons the royal arms and they begin spinning around him.

"Should the Chosen fail, that too is fate." Ravus raises his sword again and went to strike the prince. Before he could bring it down, his blade was deflected by another. He stumbled backwards and casted his glare towards the person who parried his attack, ready to swing his sword a second time.

(Y/n)'s slitted eyes narrowed at Ravus' movements. Raising the cosmic blade gifted to her by Brahma, she ducked under his sword and slammed the pommel into his gut. The high commander collapsed to a single knee. The oxygen was knocked from his lungs and his grip on his sword slipped, resulting in him to drop it. It clattered against the ground. She kicked it out of his reach, pointing the tip of her sword at his throat. She stared down into his heterochromia eyes with a stoic expression. "How does it feel to taste your own medicine?"

Ravus went to snap back, but his eyes fell on the blade she wielded. His eyes narrowed, gritting his teeth. "The Creator's Blade..." He then took note of the gemstone embedded in her upper right arm and her slitted eyes. "You are-!"

"I'd say that's far enough," a voice spoke up. Everyone turned their attention to the owner of the voice and saw Ardyn sauntering towards them. Beside him was Callyx. The auburn-haired man smiled at Noctis. "A hand, Highness?"

"Not from you," Noctis scoffed.

"Oh, but I'm here to help," he innocently replied.

Ignis was suspicious of the chancellor's and Callyx's sudden appearance. "And how is that?"

"By taking the army away."

Gladio glowered at him. "You expect us to believe that?"

"When next we meet, it'll be across the sea. Just so happens we have business of our own with the tutelary deity. Don't we?" Ardyn then took a few steps toward (Y/n), who was still pointing her blade at Ravus' throat. He took off his hat and bowed. "Please do forgive my acquaintance, my dear. He has quite the temper."

The guardian stepped away from Ravus, withdrawing her blade. She noticed Ardyn and Callyx were staring at the cosmic weapon. The chancellor's face remained stoic while the emerald-eyed spirit gaped in shock. He went to step forward, but Ardyn stopped him.

"Ardyn, but she's..." Callyx began.

"We are leaving," the chancellor interrupted the guardian. He then helped Ravus up and said his goodbyes. "Fare thee well, Your Majesty, and safe travels." Ravus, Callyx, and Ardyn walk away.

"You guys know that guy?" Prompto asked.

"Ravus Nox Fleuret, first son of Tenebrae...and elder brother to Lady Lunafreya," Ignis explained.

(Y/n) dispelled the sword with a heavy sigh. "What a weird trio..."

"I'll say," Noctis said.

"They were really into your sword, (Y/n)," Prompto commented. "Where did you get it?"

"That's...a story for another day," she forced a smile.

Gladio rubbed the spot where Ravus hit him with his sword. "I don't care where the damn thing came from. Nice moves back there, by the way."

"Consider it payback for what he did to you and Noctis." She combed a hand through her (h/c) locks. "Now then, let's get out of here."

"Yes, please!" Prompto chanted.

Previous Chapter || Next Chapter || Masterlist

[tanakax123]

hii 💕could you write about being nekomas ,inarizakis and fukurodanis manager and how they would react to you doing that new cardi b tiktok dance:~ ✨𝐹𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓉𝑜𝓅 𝓂𝒶𝓀𝑒 𝒾𝓉 𝒹𝓇𝑜𝓅..✨~

WAP dance reaction 

A/N: HEY ANON!! thanks for asking for this!! it actually inspired me to learn the wap dance AHHH I'm hella sore that's all i have to say eep. N E WAYS hope you enjoy!!

-------------------------------------

Fukurodani

Since the dance came out on TikTok you have seen teens dancing it in front of their parents to get a reaction

Of course, you kind of don’t want to do that

Or you would get your ass kicked 

So you decide to do it in front of the fukurodani team 

Before you do it you decide to ask Yuki and Kaori for their opinion 

Of course, they say yes

The only problem is you didn’t want to do it in front of the coach 

So when the coach has to leave for a fast meeting you decided that is was your time to shine.

Yuki brings out a little stereo she has had with her since you said the idea and you connected it to your phone 

Everyone was looking at you guys weird. 

You clicked on the TikTok app and on the sound as well

They all stare at you set up the camera 

The second the song starts they all give you their full attention 

Seeing you kick so high was honestly a shock 

Like wtf?? Who is this?? 

Then you put you hands on the floor while shaking your ass that when all the boys started yelling and hyping you up 

You felt like a bad bitch 

when you started to go down on the floor 

That when you saw the owl hair

You look up to see

And bokuto is grinding on the floor with you

Bokuto fucking knew the dance 

Of course, he did 

The second he started dancing with you everyone started to hype him up even more 

And they all went wild 

I mean who wouldn’t 

Bokutos phat ass>>>>

You decide to let bokuto do the rest of the dance as you hype him up with his teammates 

You only join him at the end when the splits came up because bokuto could not do them 

When the dance finishes bokuto hugs you and runs up to akaashi 

“DID YOU  SEE THAT KAAASHI?!?!”

Honestly, how could you have expected this to have gone any different

--------------------------------------

Nekoma 

The second the song and dance came upon your for you page you knew that you had to do it in front of the Nekoma boys 

Since becoming their manager they have become really overprotective of you 

So you know doing this dance would make them crazy 

You had the whole thing planned out 

When it was finally time to work on individual practice you decided it was time to make your move 

Everyone around you was getting ready to start their practice 

You set up your phone on one of the benches 

And press start

The second the music starts everyone around you stopped what they were doing and turned to look at you 

You then start shaking your ass and that’s when they snapped

Yamamoto is the first one to snap back into reality and starts to hype you up 

“WOAHHHHHHHHH” 

Then when you start to grind on the floor you feel large hands grab you by the waist

Fucking kuroo is picking you up from the floor 

“Yeah that’s not happening”

And that’s when you actually started to pay attention to your surroundings 

Lev and inuoka are covering their eyes with their hands shyly 

Kenma is looking away with a small blush on his face 

Yaku was walking towards your phone to stop the video

Stupid overprotective boys

You post the video and because of them the video goes viral 

Next thing you are making a video explaining that you are not dating kuroo.

---------------------------------

Inarizaki

It was all atsumus idea 

“Hey we should do the WAP dance from TikTok in front of the team”

Literally why did you agree?

You have no idea 

Atsumus ideas always go bad 

Yet here you were

After practice everyone was cleaning up

Atsumu told you this was the perfect time to do it 

You were kind of nervous to do it in front of everyone 

But once you see atsumu setting up the phone you realize that there was no backing down now 

You start with the high kick 

Next you squat and lay your hands standing in front of you and started to shake your ass

You were expecting to get a reaction 

Literally ANY TYPE OF REACTION 

ANY AT ALL

But no

No reaction

They all just look at you and atsumu 

Roll their eyes

And continue on with their clean up

“Atsumu you dumbass!!! Hurry up and help us clean!!!” 

They honestly dont care

Lol

But osumu sure looks more red than usual

Oop

-------------------------------------

i rlly believe that inarizaki would be so annoyed like honestly LMFAO

[sillyrabbit81]

Her Heavy Cross

Summary: Three years after tragedy hits, Lana she decides to start dating again. She meets Will through a dating app and they begin an online romance. After months of constant requests, Lana relents and agrees to meet and go on an irl date with Will. But is Will who he says he is? Lana is quickly pulled into an intense relationship forcing her to confront her tragic past. Will Lana face it or will she close her heart forever?

Pairing: OMC x OFC

Word Count: approx 3.6k

Warnings: smut, swearing, Dom vibes, dirty talk

Authors Note: The story started as a Henry Cavill fanfiction but I changed it to be an original character, but shades of Henry are still there. Hope you enjoy the story and thanks for reading.

Part 14 Part 16

Part 15

After lunch, Liam took me on a tour of his house. We skipped the ground floor as I had already seen pretty much everything.

The first floor was a complete mystery to me. First, Liam showed me his study. It had two desks; on one, Liam had a fancy-looking PC, the other had a laptop and scripts and other paperwork scattered around. It had a large built-in bookcase with only a few books in it, most of them mine. I frowned at this. For an avid reader, he had a small collection. There was also a tiny bathroom, a guest bedroom which Liam says sometimes Ryan stays in.

The last room was a cinema room, all painted black with three rows of reclining chairs set on raised platforms with a projector screen. "This is fantastic," I said. There were cupboards, also black to store discs. When I opened them, I saw Liam's movie collection was also surprisingly bare. "For someone in the film industry, you don't have a lot of movies."

"I do, but most of them are back in London. It's the same thing with all my books and half my wardrobe. I don't know how long I'll be here. If the show is a success and gets picked up for another series, I might ship some of it here."

I let his words sink in. I don't know why, but it never really occurred to me that he may pick up and leave in six months. I felt myself close up and shut down. Regret started to set in. I tried to ignore it and tell myself to cross that bridge when the time comes. I forced a smile as I closed the cupboards and said to Liam, "What's next?"

We went up to the second floor. Liam's bedroom was there with another two bedrooms and a sitting room. The final floor was where the real master bedroom was. It had the gorgeous bathroom we were in last night and a huge bedroom that took up nearly the whole space. It had an even bigger wardrobe than Liam's, split in two with distinct areas for each partner. The bedroom had its own lounge area, and the whole room was arranged like a hotel suite complete with en-suite balcony and city views. It was exceptional. I was so blown away by the house, mansion really, that for a while, I forgot to worry about the future.

"Why didn't you use this as your bedroom? It's amazing."

Liam shrugged. "I did when I first moved in. But it was too big for just me. I felt lonely up here, and it was that bit harder for Cole to come and see me. I almost moved down to the first-floor bedroom, but it doesn't have a dressing room, so I went to the one I'm in now. What do you think?"

I was leaning on the balcony railing, looking towards the city. The trees were a colourful mix of green, red and gold. A few were starting to lose their leaves. It was so pretty. I felt Liam come up behind me and wrap his arms around me. He put his chin on my shoulder, and we both looked out towards the city. "Of the house? It's amazing. I don't know how else to describe it. I mean, it's a bit much for me. I'd cry if I had to clean it. But I assume you have cleaners?" Liam nodded. "Yeah, I wouldn't live in a place this big without a cleaner."

"I'm glad you like it. I want you to be comfortable when you come over."

I interlaced my fingers with his and held them against my belly. "I'm definitely comfortable right now." We stood there for a while and relaxed into each other. Thoughts of Liam leaving reared it's ugly head a few times, but I ignored it. Instead, I focused on now. All I could do was enjoy the time I had with Liam and make the best of it.

Soon the wind started to pick up, and I grew cold. Liam took me back inside.

"I've got to work out for a bit," Liam said as we took the stairs down. "Do you think you can keep yourself occupied for an hour or so?"

"I could join you if you want? I didn't go to the gym yesterday so I could do with some exercise."

"Yeah, ok, let do it."

Liam went into his dressing room, and I changed in his room. I put on a pair of white and black ankle grazer tights and a white sports bra. I felt good in it and knew I looked good too. I went over to the chair to put my shoes and socks on and caught Liam looking through the door.

He was dressed already in shorts and a singlet. Guys always seem to get dressed so quickly. It takes me ages to dress unless I'm in a rush. Liam leaned in the doorway, arms crossed over his broad chest, watching me. I ignored him as I did my shoes up.

"You look good in that." He said. I caught myself straightening my back, and a warm tingle flowed through me. I liked his little compliments.

"Thanks," I said, getting up. I put my hair in a ponytail, deliberately sticking my chest out as I did.

"Is that what you normally wear to the gym?"

"I usually wear a singlet over the top."

"But not today?" A smile spread over his face.

I smiled and said airily, "Nope, not today."

"I know what you're doing, Sweetheart." He walked past me, patting my bottom as he did. I tried to look innocent. "Come on. Let's go."

Liam put some music on and got started. Cole heard the music and came in, plopping himself on his mat in the corner. I blocked both of them out as much as I could and focused on the music. I was not going to get caught looking at Liam. I was going to make him look at me.

I got on the bike to do a bit of cardio. After warming up, I spent 10 minutes doing some interval training and worked up a decent sweat. I went over to the barbell, removed several weights, muttering "fucking hero" under my breath. I started my weights with a few sets of deadlifts. I noticed Liam in the corner of my eye with a kettlebell. He was sweaty too and looked amazing doing his lifts, but I pulled my eyes away. He was watching me. Good. I tried hard to keep the smirk off my face, but it was bloody difficult.

I focussed on my next exercise. I changed the weight again for the overhead press. These were hard for me, as my upper body was weaker than my lower body. I did these as quickly as possible because I hated them and only did them now because I knew they would drive Liam to distraction.

I did some goblet squats with a dumbbell before moving to my favourite, the weighted hip thrust. I got the barbell again, sat with my back against a bench, and brought the barbell to my hips. I planted my feet, and exhaling, I leaned back onto the bench, squeezing my glutes until my upper body and hips are straight. Then I lowered and exhaled again and repeated the exercise. When I had finished the set, I lowered myself to the floor and rested.

"Do you do that at the gym?" Liam asked.

I didn't look at him, knowing I would smile if I did. "Yeah. Why? Am I doing it wrong?" I knew full well I was doing it right.

"No, your form is lovely," I ordered myself not to blush. Liam paused and asked, "Are there men at your gym?" Got him.

"Yeah, it's usually 75% men."

"Lucky bastards." I looked at him and giggled. I wanted to smack myself. I was trying to be sexy, not a fucking child. He was sitting on a bench press. His legs were on either side of the bench, and his elbows rested on his knees. He was still sweating, his curls plastered to his forehead. His arms glistened. I wanted him to fuck me so badly.

Composing myself, I said. "I have another set to do."

"I'm finished." He said, "Go ahead. I'll wait."

I got back into position and repeated the set. When I finished, I lowered myself back to the floor. Liam asked. "Done yet?" Liam was standing now. He had moved closer and had his hands on his hips.

"One more." I was excited. My heart rate was raised, not just from the exercise.

Liam growled impatiently.

I started my last set, and my body was trembling. I didn't know if I could do the full set. I was too excited, too turned on. Liam entered my field of vision, watching me as I worked. I wasn't going to be able to do it with him watching. I closed my eyes, found my focus, and continued.

As I finished and rolled the barbell away, Liam lifted it and put it away. I laid down on my back and stretched out my muscles.

Liam stood over me. "You did that on purpose." It wasn't a question.

Still trying to play innocent, I said, "I don't know what you're talking about. I was just working out."

"Get up."

"I'm stretching."

"You're done. Get up."

I smiled at him and put my hand out. "Help me up?"

He grasped my hand and lifted me. He pulled me close and kissed me hard. "You're a fucking tease." He said. He didn't let me go. He held me tighter, his hand resting on my arse.

I started to protest that I didn't know what he was talking about, but he spanked me and said. "Don't deny it." He said, lifting me and wrapping my legs around his waist. "You know you were trying to get me hard." I could feel him against me. It had worked. "Since it worked, you can deal with it." His voice had taken on the gravelly tone he used when he was turned-on. It thrilled me. I put my arms around Liam's neck. Kissing me again, he walked out of the room. His lips tasted salty as I kissed him back.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked.

"I'm giving you what you want. I'm going to fuck you."

"I didn't say that I wanted that," I said. Oh, but I did want that.

"You didn't have to," Liam said. He pushed me against the wall in the elevator as he pressed the button. "You know what to say if you want me to stop." He looked me in the eyes, "Anytime you want me to stop, I will. Don't hesitate or do anything you don't want to." I nodded to show him I understood. "Good."

When the lift opened, he took me to the bathroom we had used last night. I chuckled when I saw his clothes were still in a pile on the floor. He had let the water out of the bath and replaced my robe.

Liam took me over to the shower. "Shoes off," he said, and I took my shoes and socks off while he did the same. "Let your hair down." I pulled the band out and shook my hair until the curls fell around my shoulders. "Take your pants off." I lowered my tights slowly and stepped out of them. Liam did the same I could see how hard he was now. He continued to tell me to undress as he did the same until we both stood, our bodies bare.

He was beautiful standing there naked and hard. His arms looked more impressive than usual because of his work out. I wanted to touch him. I stepped closer to him and put my hand on his bicep. I felt my way up his arm, over his shoulder and across his collarbone. I stood on my toes to kiss his neck while I felt his chest. I reached my hands around his back and pressed myself against him. "Get in," he said. "Hurry."

I let him go and got into the shower. The temperature was perfect, and I let the water run all over me. I ran my hands through my hair to make sure it was all wet before turning around and facing Liam. He turned me around until I met the wall and used his body to shepherd me until my whole body was against it.

The tiles were cold, instantly making my nipples grow hard and tingly, sending ripples of pleasure down to my sex. My arms were pulled behind my back, elbows bent and forearms next to each other. Liam's body pushed into me, holding them there. In this position, I was helpless, and at his will, he could do what he wanted. It excited me. My whole centre throbbed. I wanted him. He was taking too long.

Liam's knees forced my legs apart, and I could feel my slick arousal on my thighs. He tilted my hips so my bottom jutted out. I thought of how I must look, arse out, legs apart, arms behind my back with my breasts and face pushed into the wall, his huge body covering mine. He leaned his head on the tiles next to mine, and his teeth nipped at my ear. I shivered in pleasure, in desperation and need.

I cried out in shock and relief as I felt Liam's fingers reaching around and parting my slit. "Fuck," he growled into my ear. "You feel so fucking good." He found my clit and played with me.

I cried out. I was so aroused I was almost too sensitive for his touch to feel good. I tried to pull away, but Liam's hold was firm. His fingers followed my every movement, not willing to let go until their mission was complete. He kissed and bit my neck and shoulders, adding more sensations to my already overwhelmed body. I didn't think I'd be able to take it.

Then it felt good, better than good, and I was able to stay still and let him have me. Liam's fingers danced over me. My cries quickened, and my body felt tight. I knew my climax was fast approaching.

Liam knew too. "Are you going to cum, Lana?" He stopped kissing me and watched my face. I couldn't say anything. I was too strung out, too close. I nodded as best I could. Liam put his hand into my hair and pulled my head back.

"After you cum I'm going to stick my cock into your tight wet pussy and fuck you until I cum. Is that what you wanted, Lana? Is that what you wanted when you got dressed in your skin-tight clothes? When you wore that bra that pushed your perky little tits together? When you lifted those weights, and I had to watch you thrust your arse and hips around? Is this what you wanted?" I tied to say yes, but instead, I came undone.

Liam kissed me, his mouth consuming me, his tongue owning my mouth as little aftershocks rippled through me. He took what little breath I had, and I was left gasping. The sound of the shower was suddenly thunderous in my ears as my senses returned. The stream of water was hot against my cooling skin, but it felt good. I was still gasping when I felt Liam's cock at my entrance. He stood up straight, releasing my hair and arms. Although they ached, I put my arms against the wall to brace for what I knew was to come.

His hands steadied my hips as his cock parted me, opening me up to him. I heard him groan as he entered me. I was tight from my orgasm, but I was so wet and relaxed he slid in quickly. His size stretched me until I was full, and he had sheathed himself completely. He wasted no time and immediately ploughed into me. Each thrust was rough, almost reaching the point of painful, but always just shy. I pushed back into him, arching my back further to give his movements more room.

His fingers dug deep into my hips as he forced them back to meet his. Each push seemed to elicit a deep exhale from Liam's throat, a growl that grew more shallow with each moment. I heard him bellow as his hands reached up for my shoulders. He pulled my shoulders down as he pushed so hard into me, I thought I would split in two. He held me there for a moment as he let go into me, and I cried out, unsure if it hurt or felt like heaven. I felt him release inside me, pulling me down while he pushed into me. I almost cried no more, but it would have been a lie because the hurt was too sweet.

Liam's head lulled onto my back as he released my shoulders and regained his breath. He lifted his head to turn me around. With my back against the tiles, he once more leaned into me, this time just to hold me, his head buried in my neck. I held him to me, wanting his comfort, and he kissed my neck softly, moving up to my face and kissing my lips.

He was smiling as he brushed my hair off my face. Then he moved me under the water. He found the body wash, couldn't find a sponge or anything so he just used his hands to wash me. He ran his hands all over my body, and it felt heavenly. He rubbed my shoulders, massaging deep into me, his thumbs moving so deeply they almost hurt. Any tension I had left fell away, and I felt light and free. He gave himself a quick wash before he stepped out and brought me a robe and slipped one on himself.

"Finally, you decide to cover up," I said as I watched him use a towel to dry his hair. His curls were a cute little mess on his head almost fluffing up like a duckling.

"Yeah, righto mate." He said, using my slang back at me.

I laughed. "Seems I'll make an Aussie out of you yet."

"Pull your head in," Liam said, complete with a halfway decent accent.

"What the hell? I don't think I've told you that one!"

Liam smiled and kissed me on the nose. "That one I learned from Boyd."

"Who's Boyd?"

"Boyd McCarthy. He is going to play my best friend. He's helped me out with a few phrases. However, I don't entirely trust him. He tried to get me to believe in drop bears."

"I like him already," I said as I gathered my clothes.

"Well, you'll meet him on Thursday."

"I still don't know what to wear to that."

Liam had his clothes, and we went downstairs. "I can take you shopping tomorrow if you'd like."

"I wouldn't even know where to start."

"Usually, high-end fashion boutiques or department stores."

I thought for a minute. We had arrived in the bedroom, and Liam went into his dressing room.

"Ok. I think a department store. They will have everything I need, shoes and a bag. We won't have to go to a million places."

"If you want to go to a few boutiques as well, I don't mind. We can take as long as you want."

I shook my head. "I don't like clothes shopping. I order most of my stuff online. I'd rather spend a day online shopping than dealing with crowds in shopping centres. I'm only agreeing to go into a shop because I have no idea what's in fashion or if I enough time to get the right dress online." I looked at my bag, "Hey Liam, what are we doing for dinner? Are we staying in?"

"What does it look like?" Liam came out in his tracksuit pants.

"Fair enough, tracky dacks it is."

Part 16

[sorenmarie87]

Zeppelin, No!

Summary:  You finally meet Dean, but not in the way you were expecting.  

Pairing: Dean x Plus Size! Reader.  Sam, Carrie (OC), Haley (OC), Zeppelin.  

Square Filled: Online Dating

Word Count: 1,478

Warnings/ Rating:  Language, innuendos.  

A/N:  Written for @spngenrebingo​​ and beta’d by the lovely @littlehotmess26​​​.  Also, the idea for this fic was given to me by @fictionalabyss​​​.  

--

You had pretty much given up on the whole dating scene after a former friend had scared away the guy you had a major crush on.  You figured that it was easier to be alone than to deal with being in a relationship with anybody.  That was until you realized how alone you felt.  

You asked your best friend for an app suggestion, as a way to get yourself out of the funk you were currently in.  The first app you tried, all you kept getting were people asking for nudes and quite a few unsolicited dick pics.  You were close to deleting it but when you received a message from “Impala67”, you decided to give it one last chance.  

No dick pic, no rude ass questions about your weight, just a simple question of what your favorite band was and if it was anything other than Led Zeppelin, you were wrong.  You chuckled as you typed out your response and the two of you spent the rest of the night talking.  

You found yourself messaging him whenever you had a spare moment and a lot of the time, it was when you were at work.  “You’ve got this weird grin on your face, and it needs to stop.  You’re scaring away the customers.”

“Rude, first of all..”

“Just stating a simple fact.”  Carrie snickered as you threw a nearby cat toy at her.  A simple ‘hey’ was heard before you giggled and finished typing out your message.  

“He sent me a picture of his brother that I was gonna share with you, but if you wanna be like that.”

“No, show me please?”  She placed her hands together as if she was praying and you laughed.  

“Wait, did I ever show you what he looks like?”  

“Mhmm, and girl, I’m jealous!  There’s a lot that man could do to you, and if you ever meet, LET HIM.  Then tell me about it because I wanna live vicariously through you.”

“If and when that ever happens, we’ll have a sleepover and I’ll give you all the dirty details.”  You winked at her and went through the gallery on your phone to pull up your favorite picture of him. 

“Can you at least tell me what your mystery man’s name is?”  You handed your phone to her and grinned at the expression forming on her face.  

“That’s Dean… and if you go back a few, you’ll find that other picture I was talking about.”  

“This might be a strange question but has he shown you what his dad looks like?”

“No…”

“I’ll bet you 20 bucks Daddy Impala is fine as fuck.”  

“Do I need to spray you down with a water bottle?”

“Possibly.”

--

awholelottalove:  I’d bet you anything that my day was worse than yours.

Impala67:  Really now?

awholelottalove:  Yeah.  

Impala67:  I explored an abandoned hospital today with my brother.

awholelottalove: you went on a ghost hunt?  Oh, did you find anything?

Impala67:  Not the point princess.  What made your day so terrible?

awholelottalove: This kid thought it would be hilarious to release all of our small pets in the store.  I'm talking hamsters, rabbits, guinea pigs, mice...  

awholelottalove:  My co-worker was laughing her ass off as we tried to put everyone back where they were supposed to be. 

awholelottalove: I’m just grateful it wasn’t the reptiles… or the spiders. 

Impala67:  Not fond of spiders and snakes?

awholelottalove:  No.  Not to mention - I brought Zeppelin into work with me and he was no help at all.

Impala67:  Zeppelin? 

awholelottalove:  Yeah.  Wanna see my big ball of fur?

Impala67: Umm...yes?

awholelottalove: 

Impala67: Oh, that's what you meant.  I thought you were - you know what, nevermind what I was thinking.

--

“All I’m saying Dean is that it has been three days and I feel like we’re just going in circles.  We must’ve missed something.”  Sam ran his hand through his hair and sighed.

The boys were used to unusual cases at this point in time but nothing was making sense.  Dean sighed as they continued walking down the street.  “We’ll just have to go over everything again…”  Dean could admit that he wasn’t putting his all into it because he knew somewhere in this crazy-ass town, you were here.

“Dean?”  Sam quietly asked as Dean walked ahead of him but he let out a huge laugh when out of nowhere this giant fluffy black dog tackled him onto the ground and started licking his face.  

“Get off of me!”  This didn’t deter the dog and Sam sure as shit wasn’t helping out at all.  

“I think you made a new friend.”  He laughed, the whole situation amusing to him.  “Why not adopt him?  I mean there is an adoption fair going on over in the park right now.”  

“No dogs, Sammy,”  Dean muttered as the dog let out a soft whine and Dean started scratching behind his ears.  “I’m sorry, fella.  Why do you look familiar though?”

“Maybe someone over there can tell us who he belongs to.”  Sam laughed again as the dog started sniffing around Dean’s jacket pockets.  “I think he’s looking for something to eat.”

“The only thing I have on me…”  Dean pulled out the bag of honey barbecue beef jerky and he about jumped when the dog barked as if he was asking for a piece.  “I don’t know big guy, I have a feeling this is bad for you.”

“You’re not giving him the whole bag, just give him a piece Dean.”

“But the salt!”  

“Dean.”

“Sam.”

As if he had had enough, the dog swatted the bag of jerky out of Dean’s hands, picked it up from the spot on the ground, and took off running back towards the park.  “Son of a bitch!  Come on Sammy…”

Dean wasn’t a slow runner at all, but trying to keep up with a full-grown Newfoundland dog was tougher than what he thought.  

--

“Okay Haley, are you a cat person or a dog person?”  You could tell she was thinking hard about what you just asked.

“I love cats but I’m allergic and I’m sort of afraid of bigger dogs…”

“Can I tell you a secret?”  Haley nodded and you squatted down to her eye level.

“I used to be afraid of big dogs too until I got my dog.  He’s massive.”  You looked away for a split second before turning back to Haley.  “Speaking of...where is Zeppelin?” 

“Looks like he’s bringing you a snack!” Carrie points out, laughing. You look over to where she’s pointing to see Zeppelin running towards you with something in his mouth. Oh no Zeppy, what did you get yourself into? 

“Haley sweetie, you might want to stand over there with my friend.”  Standing up, you make sure Haley is safe and out of the way.  You tried to brace yourself before Zeppelin tackled you to the ground.  

“Zeppelin, no!”  You were laughing as Zeppelin dropped the bag of jerky on your chest and licked your face.  “Stop it, you heathen.”  

“Did you just say, Zeppelin?”  You had to push Zeppelin’s head out of the way to see the man standing above you, slightly out of breath. 

“Yes?”

“Y/N?  Is that you?”

“Depends on who’s asking.”  He holds out his hand and you feel your cheeks heat up before as he helps you up from the ground.  

“Y/N, he’s hotter in person!”  Carrie adds in before she takes over helping Haley.  You shake your head and as soon as you’re standing upright,  you dust off your overalls and finally meet his gaze.

“Dean?”  

“In the flesh princess.”  

Your smile matched his as you wrapped your arms around his waist.  "I can't believe you're here."

“Not to break up this chick flick moment, but Dean, who is this?”  You smack Dean in the lower back as you pull yourself away and hold out your hand for Sam to shake.

“I guess he never really told you about me, huh?  I’m Y/N and I suppose you can call me his girlfriend?  We aren’t that big on titles.”

“I don’t know what she’s talking about Sammy.”  You smirked as you turned towards your dog and muttered ‘get him Zeppelin.’  

In a moment of misunderstanding,  Zeppelin barked and started chasing after Sam who was more than happy to play with him.  “While Sammy is busy playing with Zeppelin, you wanna get something to eat?”

“I’d like that a lot.”  You smiled and asked Carrie if she’d take Zeppelin home for you.  She nodded in agreement as she watched Sam and Zeppelin run around the park.  

"Hey Dean, before you whisk my best friend away for the rest of the night,  I need to ask you something.”  You grin at Carrie who is currently sizing Dean up and quietly chuckle.  You knew this was coming.  

"What's up?"

"Is your dad hot?"

--

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Dean Winchester - @idreamofplaid​​​​​​​​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​ @akshi8278​​​ @deans-baby-momma​​​ @onethirstyunicorn​​​

[indigo474]

Hi My name is April.. I'm into skipping rocks and making fires. Ha. I went to the woods to run but gathered sticks instead so i can build fires. I'm probably going to need more wood. I had a great day. I lifted heavy- 2 days in a row. I do enjoy lifting heavy things. I can't seem to get past 100 lbs for my upper body. It's a bit frustrating. Lower body- I've never NOT lifted whatever .. 165 dead lift- split squats.. push, pull- we talked about addictions- food addictions. it's such a horrible cycle- i don't believe anyone who is morbidly overweight is actually happy. I know I wasnt - i used food to stuff my emotions for years and years.. even now, if shit goes down between me and Madison i'll find myself in the kitchen looking for something to eat. actually- it was a while ago that happened. In our apartment- i recognized what was happening.. we rarely have any type of binge food the house now. There were a few things i had to tell Madison to not buy anymore.. I actually used running as a way to deal with the stress of buying my home. so, there is hope- but its hard and takes self awareness.. there is the hard of making the right food choice and logging and prepping or there is the hard of self loathing and feeling like crap-both are hard. We got to talking about this because of a guy i work with.. he is so big he has to sit in a special chair and he has a hard time walking to the bathroom.. its scary.

this is the 4th Christmas i wont be seeing my kids. I am debating sending them their Christmas ornaments and stockings and things that belong to them. I'm ready to let the stuff go. I'm just ready to let go. it is what is is and life goes on. Ive cried a million tears. I carry no bitterness or anger in my heart for them.. only love. its their stuff and i want to make room for new things.. things that bring me joy. I'll gather it together and decide what to .

I got a lot done today. I slept in until 8. I would like to run tomorrow. I'm not sure how my legs will feeling the morning. Madison wants to hang out with me before she foes to work. My left knee has been hurting since Thursday. It actually feels ok right now- motrin. Its not swollen.. I swear every time i ask the universe to show me how good my life can be it delivers. I do believe I am the creator of my life- while i am incredibly grateful for the career i have i am open to something new- i don't know the details.. even if i start some sort of side hustle .. so much to do.. but yes, i am pretty much open to anything. I am hoping 2024 is the year i finally meet someone.. i dont know if i should get back on the dating apps .. i am not a fan.. i cant imagine anyone is a fan,.. just awful. I need going out cloths.. I need to .. have sex with someone other than myself.

[tsipasce]

Same Difference, Ch.10

A/N: FYI, more violence with a spritz of character development~

Chapters: 01  |  02 |  03 |  04 | 05  | 06 | 07 | 08 |  09

AO3 | Fanfic

A month had passed since Nanami began training with Rappa. Though she regularly checked her eardrums to make sure they hadn’t ruptured from his teaching style, aka yelling 24/7, she was already seeing the benefits. Thanks to his recommendation to add some more proteins and healthy fats to her diet, she noticed her muscles were more toned. And thanks to his “be ready for a fight at all times” attitude, she noticed her reflexes had improved. It was an effective way of teaching as it carried over to her life outside of the gym, much to the disappointment of Dr.Tanaka who was notorious for his practical jokes and jump scares around the hospital.

“It’s no fair, you’re always so ~*cool and reserved *~ now. How am I supposed to get in my midday pick-me-up pranks in now?” Tanaka whined as they sat in the café for their coffee date.

“Oh, so I’m cool now? Besides, if you need a mental break, just lock your office door and hide under your desk like the rest of us functioning adults.” She replied, casually sipping her drink while checking her phone.

“You kids nowadays, always so depressing. What’s got you so zoned into your phone anyways?”

“One, you’re literally only 5 years older than me. And two, you wouldn’t get it, old man.”

Tanaka gasped dramatically clutching at an imaginary dagger in his heart. “You wound me—oh thank you!” he responded as the barista brought his drink over, cutting off what Nanami was sure would have been a Shakespearean performance. “Anyway, so how’re your classes going? You look like you’re getting shredded already.”

“Oh please, it’s only been a month or so. But to answer your question… it’s been awesome! Super tiring, but awesome, nonetheless. I feel… more secure.” The conversation was meant to be light, but the last part came out more sincere and thoughtful than she intended.

From across the table, Tanaka could see a far-off look in her eyes as she gazed out the window for a beat, fiddling with the crow keychain on her phone. He knew there was something more going on that she wasn’t telling him since her fiasco at the construction site but also knew better than to pry. From her residency until now, Nanami proved she could handle herself and he trusted that if she wasn’t saying anything, it was probably for good reason. However, it did little to alleviate his worry.

Looking back across the table, Nanami could see her friend deep in thought. Tanaka was a goofball, but he knew when something was off and when to get serious. Though she was protecting him, Hitomi, and everyone else close to her by lying, the guilt persisted. Now realizing they were staring at each other, they shared a moment of realization and then a snicker, and a laugh. A knowing smile crept across their faces, Nanami patting Tanaka’s hand.

“You’re a real bro, you know that?”

“Always.” He smiled warmly as his beeper went off, “Oop, duty calls. We’re still on for dinner next week though, right?”

“Oh yeah, let me write it down before I forget. I’ll meet you at the restaurant, sound good?”

“You bet, I’ll see you later—be safe getting home, ok?”

“Of course,” She smiled, nodding. Nothing was said directly, but she knew what he meant. He left the café, Nanami now enjoying her mocha and treats at last.

Looking back at her burner phone for what felt like the millionth time today, there were still no further messages. It had been a week and a half since she’d seen Overhaul. It was Sunday night when her phone vibrated, the text simply reading “Out on business. Be back in 2 weeks.” The follow-up text coming a minute later, “Don’t burn the place down.” Looking back at them she found herself almost sad she wouldn’t be seeing him for a bit before slapping herself back to reality. I am not sad, I do not miss him. I am elated to have a break from that moody asshole.

As she cursed into her cup, a crow perched itself on the windowsill by her table. It pecked at the glass, cawing, interrupting what would have been a peaceful break. Nanami leered, irked at the timing. Tch. Still better company. She mused, comparing the two birdbrains. She smiled smugly as an idea popped into her head that she was just bored enough to entertain. Pulling up the camera app, she snapped a picture of the winged nuisance, sending it with the caption “Found your replacement.” After a quick chuckle to herself, a sense of panic came over her as she realized what she’d done. That was definitely too casual. He’s probably carrying out a hit or something and you sent a dumb picture of a bird? Why am I such a cornball? She bemoaned inwardly as she hurriedly locked the phone, laying it face down on the table like the bad decision would go away if she simply ignored it. He probably won’t even reply anyway… He’ll just give me a judgmental look when he gets back and never speak of it again…First order of business is finding a rock to crawl under.

Just before she facepalmed herself into oblivion, the phone vibrated. Her eyes shot wide as she stared at the offending object, knowing she’d have to pick it up at some point. Clearing her throat, she worked up the courage to turn over the phone, the text reading, “Same here.” with an attachment. She opened it up, choking on her drink when she saw a picture of a dumpster.

Yup, I walked right into that one. She thought, shedding a single tear inwardly, having only the strength to send a sad face emoji.

“Busy now. See you Monday.”

Sighing in defeat, Nanami gathered her things, hoping whatever had him so busy would make him forget her blunder.

  ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It was now Thursday evening and Nanami was in her workout gear, walking briskly towards the training room. Hearing Rappa completing his usual sets, she knew it was time to put her game face on. They’d been sparring twice a week after each session, but beforehand, he had her doing a myriad of drills and weightlifting. As she approached the door cautiously, she heard his voice booming, “DON’T JUST SIT OUTSIDE, GET IN HERE AND ON THIS BENCH.”

“Yes sir!” She piped, knowing he was officially in drill sergeant mode.

Dropping her bags and plopping in her earplugs, she headed over to the benches, completing her sets as Rappa counted aloud each repetition while throwing motivational insults in the mix. She knew the words “Get to it you sad sack of bones” and “you wreak of failure” had to be on a Ballmark card somewhere.

Finishing out her final squatting reps with a grunt, she wracked the bar, breathing heavily. Just as she was fantasizing about the water bottle in her bag, she heard him yell “NO BREAKS YET, MAGGOT” as he swung at her. She barely had time to dodge, but a week ago it would have grazed her and two weeks ago it would have had her doubling over as it made full contact. Without a second thought, she had her guard up and she was in the proper stance to launch a counterattack. They traded blows, Nanami landing 5 for every 10 of his. She’d made great strides, but becoming a master fighter in a matter of weeks just wasn’t realistic, quirk or not.

This continued for an hour, Nanami only taking a break to heal her injuries. Though it wasn’t the main goal, she’d cut her healing time in half, but it came at the price of pain. Having to repeat this over and over on small parts of her body, she could see how it would be slightly maddening to perform it on a large scale over the course of a lifetime. Interrupting her thoughts, Rappa landed another punch to her gut before tossing her across the room. Her recovery was better than the first time, but it still hurt like hell. She staggered, rushing to heal and counter him as he charged forward.

She was knocked down again and again, but refused to stay down. Today, she felt he was being particularly hard on her, but she wanted to rise to the occasion striking back every chance she got. Now feeling her stamina running low, she stumbled to her feet again, assuming her stance as she had the first time.  

“Why don’t you just use it?”

A bit dazed from the last blow, Nanami asked what he meant.

“Your quirk. Why aren’t you using it to defeat me?”

“What’s with this all the sudden?” She rasped, still out of breath, “I’ve been using it this whole time.” She defended, weakly gesturing to the pillars she’d created to help her maneuver around the arena.

“No. I mean on me. You could have ended this an hour ago… Is this a game to you?” He spoke gravely, sounding a tad annoyed.

“What? No, not at all. I ju—”

“NO EXCUSES. You think your opponent will care about your little hang-ups when it’s life or death?” He cut her off as he charged forward, barely missing her as the punch landed on the floor leaving a small crater. Her eyes widened at the realization that the punch would have split her in half.

“That could’ve killed me!”

“THAT’S THE POINT!”

The adrenaline began rushing through her veins as she felt the air in the room shift. Behind every blow there was killing intent. Confused as to why he was now hellbent on escalating the match, she managed to blurt out “W-why are you doing this?!” as she rolled to dodge another potentially fatal blow.

“YOU’RE MESSING AROUND. TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY AND STOP BEING A FUCKING COWARD!”

Still not understanding his anger, she continued to try and dodge like her life depended on it, because in that moment, it did.

“THERE’S NOTHING MORE DISRESPECTFUL THAN HOLDING BACK WHEN YOUR OPPONENT IS GIVING THEIR ALL. YOU’RE GONNA DIE RIGHT HERE IF YOU DON’T FIGHT ME LIKE YOU MEAN IT!”

She knew what he wanted her to do, but the fear of losing control was still there. In her moment of doubt, he landed a blow that sent her flying into one of her pillars. She heard a sickening snap as her leg bashed into the corner of the structure, undoubtedly shattering her femur. The pain was more than she expected, and she cried out bitterly for a moment before stifling it once again as blood welled up into her mouth from the previous blows. Spitting lazily, she saw him stalking towards her as he continued to speak, “Do you think someone in a real match is going to use restraint and wait for you to have your little breakthrough? Plenty of weaklings would kill to have a quirk like yours, but here you are wasting it. Makes me sick.” He spat, as he bent down to hold her up by the neck and she thrashed in vain to break free. “I dunno who I saw during that trial, but you sure as hell aren’t her. Let me end this pathetic existence for ya,” he said squeezing tighter.

Suddenly, the fear turned into anger and a calm rage came over her as she stopped thrashing and used her right hand to grasp firmly on his wrist. “You don’t know shit about me, but you’re about to fuck around and find out.” Taking as deep a breath as she could while still in his chokehold, Nanami focused on his anatomy, surveying every cell, every blood vessel, and every hair. In the next instant, she dropped to the floor as red coated the arena. Looking up, a moment of pure terror took over her being as the flashbacks to the first time she’d done this took over. Hyperventilating, a million thoughts raced through her mind. Just as she was felt she was drowning, she felt two hands grabbing her shoulders, squeezing firmly giving her a gentle shake before letting go. It may have been part of the episode or her brain trying to regain control, but it was enough to bring her back to earth long enough to calm down.

After a few, centering breaths, she managed to recompose herself, taking stock of the situation. Rappa was now all over the room, literally coating it. No. No more panicking. You have to focus before it’s too late to put him back. Remember the structure. Remember the shape. She repeated to herself like a mantra before gaining a clear picture in her mind of how to assemble him. Pressing her hands to the floor he was now embedded in, the pieces of him came rushing back, snapping back into shape before her eyes.

He took a sharp inhale, staring at his hands in almost disbelief that he was real. She watched him closely, hoping she hadn’t forgotten any pieces of him. He stared in her direction for a beat and she wondered if “he” was still in there or if she’d brought back some empty husk. Her question was soon answered.

“TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH! I THOUGHT I WAS A GONER, BUT YOU DID A BANG-UP JOB!” He boomed.

“I…I almost had a mental break and you’re critiquing me on my timing?? You almost killed me!”

“Yup, but you got me first. Good job today.” He reassured her, now serious.

Still reeling, all she could manage was a weak, “Thanks.”

He closed the distance between them, extending a hand in front of her. They clasped forearms as he pulled her up and she quickly remembered she hadn’t fully healed since the last couple blows. Leaning on him a bit she recovered, hoping to never have to fix injuries like them again, at least on herself. They walked over to the seats lining the walls and sat down, both recovering from the mini trauma session.

“Hey doc,”

“Yeah?”

“What made you wanna train?”

She flinched reflexively, posting up before he reassured her it wasn’t the pretext to another barrage of attacks. “Well… to get stronger, obviously. Why do you ask all the sudden? Never figured you one for deep conversation.” She remarked, taking a swig from her water bottle.

“Just curious. You and the boss got the same quirk. I think man-to-ma—or person-to-person combat is the greatest thing in the world, but you don’t have to go through all this. Most people with quirks as powerful as yours just kinda coast off that.”

She thought for a moment, reflecting to give an honest answer,” I want to be more than this.” She said, studying at her hand, outstretched in front of her. “A lot of people become reliant on their quirks--  and I did the opposite-- but in a way it’s just a different side of the same messed-up coin. I still let it define me. I just want to be capable, quirk or not… Does that answer your question?”

“Yeah, I think it does.” He said giving her a firm pat on the back, “Go get some rest, doc. “

He rose, leaving the room and Nanami alone with her thoughts. Thinking back to what grounded her earlier, she remembered a detail and quickly shook it off. He’s not even here. I really need to go home and sleep this off. And promptly call my therapist…

As she grabbed her things to go, she was so focused, she hadn’t noticed the familiar figure in the room. Clearing his throat to get her attention, she nearly jumped out of her skin. So much for the awareness training...

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

He raised his brow at the obvious question.

“Well, not like that. I mean of course you’d be here; I just mean... like what are you doing here now?” she managed to get out. Why the hell am I nervous?

“I finished my business early, decided to see how you’d progressed.”

“Oh, ok. So… you saw all that, huh?” she cautioned a glance, more than a little embarrassed.

“Most of it.”

“…Any thoughts?”

He paused, before answering,” Rappa was correct. Your hesitation will get you killed. Don’t make the same mistake again, I might not be there the next time.”

She nodded, walking past him towards the door before taking a moment to register what he’d said, “Hey, by the way… when I… disassembled him—I know this is a silly question—but did you… do anything?” she almost immediately regretted even asking.

“Like what?” His expression was blank.

Sighing to herself she decided it had to have been her brain throwing her a bone back there to save her from a mental break, “You know what? Nevermind. I’m just tired, must’ve been imagining things. See you later.”

As he watched her leave, he retrieved a clear bag with his bloodied shoes and gloves, glad he had returned earlier than planned. Replacing his subordinate would be an inconvenience, but replacing a partner would have been infinitely more difficult.