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#are you feeling the slow burn yet?
from-the-clouds · 2 years
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texas sun - joel miller x f!reader - vol. iii
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chapter summary: Somehow, you realize you've accidentally ended up spending almost every weekend for the last month and a half with either one, or all of the Millers. pairing: pre-outbreak!joel miller x f!reader words: 8.7k chapter warnings: some angst, alcohol consumption, marijuana use, suggestive thoughts (but no smut), referenced parental neglect, implied age gap. reader has daddy issues (shocker!) & a fear of intimacy. a/n: this chapter is so disgustingly sweet it might give you a cavity. truly. but its also a little self-indulgent because joel is in my dream blunt rotation :/ please be patient with updates because i have a career/social life/apartment, and am a perfectionist! i promise i will always (try) to make the wait worth your while. Also, here's a link to the song Joel plays on guitar, since it's not on Spotify so I couldn't add it to the playlist.
-April 19, 2003- 
“Well, that was awkward.”
Obviously, Joel thinks to himself as Sarah turns to watch the retreating form of her teacher, while Joel stares straight ahead at the crowd in front of him. At first, he had thought she was just being polite. It was the right thing to do, to say hello to a parent and a student if you see them outside of class. But…they were seeing each other at a bar. And she’d asked him to dance. 
We just got here, maybe later? Joel can’t even remember what he had said, something along those lines. It wasn’t a flat-out refusal, but he had been acutely aware of Sarah’s eyes boring into the back of his head from where she sat beside him, and he sort of blacked out, couldn’t recall what had caused her to get the hint, to walk away. 
Joel grunts an affirmation to Sarah, and drums his fingers against the tabletop. There’s a dance floor full of people in front of him, all under various levels of intoxication, all of them dancing. 
“Do you believe me now?” Sarah asks. 
“I never said I didn’t believe you.”
How he had allowed Tommy and Sarah to talk him into coming here tonight, he’s not sure. Probably, it had something to do with how much he loved them both. How he would, ultimately, do whatever they asked if he knew it’d make that happy. But still, honky-tonking is the last thing he wants to be doing at the end of a long week. 
There was pretty much only one decent bar in town, so he wasn’t exactly shocked he had run into someone he knew. Everyone came here – to dance, to drink, to eat, or to drown their sorrows. To see their friends, or even to find someone to take home for the night. And over the years, as a frequent customer, Joel had used this place to do all those things.
Tonight was special though, a little more family friendly. It was swing night. It happened once a month, and Joel had always made a point to take Sarah a couple times a year. When he was young, his mother had taught him and Tommy to dance, and he felt it was only appropriate to pass the skill along, even if it was almost obsolete. He hoped Sarah would be able to do the same someday, if she ever had children of her own. 
“Will you dance with me, at least?” Sarah asks.
“Of course I will,” Joel answers.. “But let’s wait for Tommy, he’s ordering our drinks.”
“You mean your drinks.”
“No, you got a Shirley Temple.”
Sarah narrows her eyes. It’s the same expression that Joel has only seen her use recently, and he actually prefers it less to the eye roll. This time, he’s glad it hasn’t come with a question from her, because when it does, it’s always a little more frightening. “Come on, you know that’s not the same.”
Before Joel can respond, he’s cut off by Tommy’s voice. 
“Look who I found.”
This is what he and Sarah have been waiting on, and Joel turns to sees Tommy with all three of their drinks in hand. Over his shoulder, there’s a woman who looks vaguely familiar, wearing daisy dukes and a plaid shirt. After a second, he realizes it’s you.
Most of the time when Joel sees you – from across the street, of course – you’re in a power suit, a pencil skirt. Sometimes, it’s more casual – athletic clothes. There was also that black silk robe he can’t seem to shake from his memory. But this is so…different. It’s clear you’re trying to blend in with the crowd, but you don’t. Not because you’re not pulling it off – you definitely are, effortlessly – he’s just pretty sure if he walks into any room you’re in, his eyes will always be drawn in your direction. 
Joel doesn’t see, but rather feels – Sarah recognize that you’re in front of her, because when she does, she’s tapping him on the arm before he can utter a greeting. “Dad, can I get out and say hi?”
He’s standing to let her out just as you step closer to the table, and you come chest to chest. “Hey,” he says. 
“Hi, Joel,” you say, a soft smile on your face. Your eyes remain locked on his just a moment too long, before Sarah is wrapping you up in a hug, and you’re focused on her when she draws back. “How are you?” you ask. 
Joel doesn’t hear Sarah’s response, because his brother is pressing a drink into his hand - a Jack and Coke, same as what you and Tommy are drinking. 
“Sit down, please!” Tommy encourages.
“Are you sure?” you ask. “This looks like a family thing, I don’t want to-” 
“Please!” Sarah exclaims. 
“What she said,” Tommy seconds Sarah’s sentiments.
For a second, you seem to contemplate the offer, and then you accept the invitation, sliding into the booth across from where Sarah has settled back next to her father. Joel makes eye contact with his brother, sitting next to you. Tommy’s eyebrows are raised suggestively, and there’s a playful smirk on his face when he tilts his head in your direction. Joel gives him nothing, already irritated by his brother’s goading. 
“Is that a Shirley Temple?” you point to Sarah’s drink. When she nods, you continue. “I haven’t had one of those in forever,” you say. 
“Want a sip?”
“Sure,” Sarah slides the glass across to you, and you sip from the straw, pondering. “I should’ve gotten one of those instead. They were my favorite growing up.” 
“Can I have a sip of yours?”
“No,” you and Joel say at the same time. 
“You’re not gonna like it,” he adds.
“You always say that, but how can you know?”
Joel sighs. “Okay, fine. Try mine.”
Sarah seems pleased to get what she wants. When the bitterness of the whiskey registers, the triumphant expression leaves her face completely. 
“Told you,” he says. Sarah grimaces, accepting defeat, and returns to her beverage. 
Tommy leans forward, urging Joel to start making conversation as if this is a date and it’s his responsibility. But before he can think of anything, Sarah pipes up. 
“Guess what?” she asks you.
“What?”
“My teacher’s here.”
“Yeah?” you ask. Joel takes a long pull off his drink, hoping it’ll loosen him up a little. 
“Yeah, she tried to hit on my dad.”
Joel feels the cocktail of whiskey and soda get caught in his throat.
“Oh….” you sound intrigued, and you lean forward. He wonders if this is the dynamic between you and Sarah when he’s not around. Like you’re two friends, engaging in some harmless gossip. “Really?” Your gaze flickers between him and Sarah. 
Sarah bobs her head once. “She has a thing for him. I can tell.”
“What makes you think that?” his brother joins in, moving closer to Sarah, crowding you between himself and the wall and putting his elbows on the table. Joel feels a flash of envy when you shift your attention towards Tommy.
“She just asked him to dance.” Sarah looks over her shoulder, nods her head towards the woman in the corner of the bar who’s probably already focused on his table anyways. Joel already knows what you’re seeing. Miss Davis is pretty, bubbly, outgoing. Probably about your age, if he had to guess, though it’s hard to say how old you are. He imagines he has ten years on you, give or take a few. And for all intents and purposes, Sarah’s teacher is the type of woman he should be interested in. 
“She’s pretty,” you say it like you’re appeasing Sarah, but you’re looking directly at Joel. He’s not sure why you kind of frighten him a little. You’re sweet, he knows, even if you’ve tried to tell him otherwise. But there’s something else there, enigmatic and alluring, that continues to draw him in. 
Tommy chimes in. “So are you gonna dance with her, Joel?”
“Uncle Tommy,” Sarah says dramatically. Her face drops for a second, though, her shoulders slumping as she angles herself towards him, lowers her voice. “I mean, if you want to, that’s fine, I guess. But I….I don’t know.”
Joel is taken aback by how long this conversation has gone on with absolutely no input from himself. Not to mention how honest Sarah is being. She doesn’t usually have much to say about his choice in women – he can usually just tell what she thinks. For her to express something so directly makes him realize how serious she is. But at the moment, he can’t find words to assure her everything will be fine. 
It must be his lack of response that causes you to lean across the table and speak to Sarah. “You know, that’s valid,” there’s a tenderness to your tone. It dawns on him that you’re trying to comfort her. “It is kind of a conflict of interest.”
“Right?” Sarah perks up, just slightly, you’ve given her some support. “It’s one of those things you said you had going on at work the other day an….an ethical…” 
“An ethical dilemma?” you finish her thought.
“Ethical dilemma! That’s it.” Sarah turns back towards Joel. “I think it's an ethical dilemma.” 
For just a split second, he wonders why he’s been letting his already-precocious child hang out regularly with a lawyer. He’s accidentally creating a monster. But thankfully, Joel is finally able to find his voice. “There is no ethical dilemma, because I wouldn’t ever consider it.”
That seems to placate Sarah, and hopefully everyone will decide to drop it. Joel catches your eyes, and there’s something akin to wistfulness there, chin propped on your hand, before you blink once and focus back on Tommy, who's asking you a question. “So, are you here alone?”
“Is it that obvious?” 
“Not at all,” Tommy smirks, not dropping his eye contact with you. “...It’s just surprising, is all.”
Joel stiffens.
“Oh, well…” you smile a little. “I’m just trying to get to know the town a little better. Trying to engage in the community, I guess. But…I’m not sure if I am doing that great of a job fitting in.”
“You are,” Joel interjects, and maybe it’s a little forward, but he’d rather say it before Tommy does. “That’s a nice flannel.”
“Thanks,” You look down at your oversized plaid shirt – the sleeves rolled up to the elbows – that hangs open over a tight white tank top. Joel can see a sliver of the black lace bra you’re wearing that pokes out above the low neckline. He wonders what it might feel like to press his face there, to feel your fingers carding through his hair, but does not allow himself to entertain the idea for very long. Not the time. “I actually had to go and buy it because I didn’t own any plaid. And by the looks of it,” You gesture towards the dance floor. “I need to invest in some cowboy boots, too.”
“One thing at a time, right?” he asks, and you agree.
“So what are you all doing here? Family outing?”
“We actually had to drag this one kicking and screaming out the door,” Tommy points to Joel. 
“You did not,” Joel defends himself.
‘We kinda did,” Sarah says. “Do you know how to dance?”
You shake your head no, look at the people twirling and dipping and dancing in pairs. “Not like that.”
“It’s really easy! I can teach you. My dad taught me.”
“Cute.” Joel looks towards Sarah, and catches you staring instead. Your eyes flit back immediately to his daughters. “But I’m not sure I’ll be any good.”
“You’ll be fine,” Sarah says like it’s already settled. Joel knows he’s spoiled her, that she ultimately gets what she wants. He worries sometimes that others won’t find her quite as endearing. 
“Sarah,” he warns. “You’re making it sound like she doesn’t have a choice.”
You hide a smile behind the rim of your glass. “It’s okay. You can teach me. Might as well learn, if I’m trying to fit in.”
Sarah seems satisfied.
“Joel tells me you grew up in New York City.” Tommy says it, and Joel notices you raise your eyebrows at the implication. He’s talked to Tommy about you. And now you know. He’s pissed at himself for doing it, but at the time he’d been drunk, a little more chatty and vulnerable than usual, and had mentioned you more than once. Too much to be a coincidence. The issue was, Joel had never expected you would talk to Tommy again. If he’d known you would, he wouldn’t have said anything. He doesn’t want to imagine the damage he had done when it was just the two of you, alone at the bar. But even now, he’s completely at his brother’s mercy. 
“Yep,” you nod. 
“You don’t have much of an accent,” Tommy remarks. 
“Not everyone has them.” 
“That’s fair.”
“I did, uh, go to a boarding school in a different state, though, so I wasn’t around it too much.” 
“Boarding school?” Sarah turns to Joel.
“Basically you live at school,” you answer her question. ”Kind of like college, but earlier. I started going when I was nine.”
Sarah frowns. “Wouldn’t you miss your family?” 
“Yes, and I did.”
“So why would you go?”
“Well…” you trail off, shift your weight. “It wasn’t up to me. My dad worked a lot, so it made sense.”
“What’d he do for a living?” Asks Tommy. 
“He’s a criminal defense attorney....owns his own firm and it does pretty well, so…” you shrug. “He was very busy.”
“And that’s why you’re a lawyer? To work for your dad?”
“At one point, that was the plan, yes."
“What happened?”
The question appears to make you uncomfortable, you cross your legs and glance down at the table. “Uhm….pass.” Joel sees your face go blank for a split second before you look up with an easy smile. It’s like the desolate look you’d been wearing was never there, and you point to your drink. “I’ll need a few more of these if you want that story.”
“Might as well order another round,” Tommy flags down a waitress.
You have one more drink, but you don’t really touch it as the four of you continue to talk. Joel has two more, and Tommy has three, because he’s Tommy, and also not driving. Both you and Joel also have to vehemently refuse his request to do a round of tequila shots. 
After a while, Sarah gets bored, then insists on teaching you to dance. You agree, but seem awfully reluctant. Joel wants to pull you aside and let you know that you don’t have to entertain everything Sarah offers, but once you’ve stood up, and he watches her arm link through yours as you both walk to the dance floor, he can’t bring himself to intervene. 
He’s never seen Sarah be so taken with someone before, and he’s filled with a vague sense of regret. He always thought that she was content with just him and Tommy. Maybe she has always needed more. It’s partially his responsibility, Joel thinks –  what could he have done to stop her mother from leaving? Even if he could’ve stopped it, they would’ve been a miserable couple…which might have been more damaging to Sarah than her mother not being around at all.
Once you’re long gone, Joel can sense what Tommy is thinking before he even opens his mouth. 
“Shut it,” Joel says before he can even hear his brother's ribbing. 
“I wasn’t even gonna say anything about that!” Tommy raises his hands, but Joel knows he’s lying.
“We should go over there,” Joel says. He trusts you, but in a bar full of drunk people isn’t interested in being far away from Sarah for too long. Both he and Tommy abandon their booth to mosey their way towards the dance floor. 
Sarah has taken you into a back corner, far away from the band playing, where the crowd has thinned a little. There’s room for him and Tommy to lean up against the wall and watch you both. 
Both your hands are clasped with Sarah’s, and she’s teaching you the counts, the steps, while you study the way that your feet move.
Joel has a feeling that if it weren’t for his daughter, you wouldn’t have hung out with his family for so long. It’s just like the hike, and as usual, he feels more like a third wheel than anything else. You’re right that you do look a little out of place here. Maybe you don’t belong,  but he likes it. You’re wearing a pair of beat up hi-tops, which are a sharp contrast to Sarah’s baby blue cowboy boots that are covered in rhinestone butterflies. He’d gotten them for her for Christmas that past year, and she only wore them during special occasions like this.
Joel is doing the best he can not to think about the way your legs look in those fucking daisy dukes. All on display, and he wonders what it might feel like to drag his tongue up the soft skin of your inner thigh, feel you quiver and whimper as he works his mouth closer to– Enough. He’s disgusted with himself for thinking about you like that right now. 
“Dad, look!” Sarah says, and it seems you’re catching on all right, but none of it looks graceful. Sarah’s trying to lead – which she has never done – so she falters often, and also can’t quite reach all the way above your head when she tries to spin you around. “Oh no, look at his face!” Sarah points. You turn his direction, and Joel realizes he has to neutralize the grimace that has crept onto his visage. “We definitely aren’t doing good.”
“I’ll get the hang of it,” you turn back to Sarah, assure her. “You’re a good teacher.” You’re being nice. Too nice, humoring her and laughing it off, even if she’s making a fool of you both. But you don’t seem to mind, because it’s making her happy. 
All of the sudden, the toe of Sarah’s boot catches on the scuffed wood floor and she lurches forward. Joel immediately pushes himself off the wall as though he could close the space and catch her before she faceplants, but he can’t, and he can already see a vision of himself sitting in the emergency room at 2 a.m waiting, while Sarah holds an ice pack on her nose. But you reach out before the image is fully realized, arms wrapping around her shoulders. “Careful!” You warn. And even though you shuffle forward with the weight of her, you keep her from falling. Once she realizes she’s safe, Sarah giggles and throws her head back, her eyes catching your own. 
He’s not sure what makes him do it. It could be the liquor, the way you look, the unspoken pressure from Tommy. Or maybe he’s just been wanting an excuse to be closer to you. Most importantly, at this rate, he feels like Sarah is going to hurt herself and also you in the process. Regardless of what the reason is, Joel decides to step in. He walks onto the dance floor.
“Alright,” Joel says once he’s gotten closer, looking at Sarah. “I can’t watch this anymore.”
“What?”
He halts in front of his daughter, jerks his hand. “Move. I’m takin’ over.”
Sarah rolls her eyes, but smiles a little, and drops her hands from your shoulders. Joel offers you his hand. “You mind?” 
You look between Joel and Sarah, and she gives you an encouraging nod. “He taught me, he does know what he’s doing.”
“Well okay,” you take Joel’s hand. “You better not embarrass me,” and then you actually fucking wink at him. Already overwhelmed by the delicate weight of your hand in his palm, it almost sends him over the edge. He’s lucky he’s in public, with his family, because he doesn’t think he’d behave himself otherwise.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Joel answers. “Besides, I don’t think anything could be worse than what I was just watching.”
You giggle, and step forward when he tugs you just closer to dance, taking you fully in his arms. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Sarah dragging Tommy onto the dance floor. Everyone is taken care of.
You’re smart. And because of it, you’re a fast learner. Even people who can’t really dance can usually figure this out, himself included. But in Joel’s opinion, it’s always been less about getting the steps right, and more about who’s keeping him company. 
And you’re great company. 
Eager, willing, gentle…soft. He’s embarrassed at how long it’s been since he’s been this close to an adult woman, and normally he might be a little nervous, but instead, he just feels…comfortable. 
But Joel is a selfish man. He always wants more. Wants the band to play a slower song, so then he’d have an excuse to pull you closer. Wind an arm around your waist, whisper things in your ear that no one else could hear, and feel your breath hitch when they register. But this isn’t really the dance for that, and the rest of his family is just steps away. He’ll have to compromise – which he doesn’t like. 
“I’m going to dip you,” Joel says, matter-of-factly.
“No you’re not.”
“I am,” he insists. “It’s essential.”
“I seriously doubt that.” 
“Look,” he tilts his head to Tommy and Sarah, and the latter is laughing as she pitches all her weight backwards into his arms. He nearly drops to one knee to catch her, she’s still so petit, but their form is actually pretty good. And they aren’t the only people in the room doing it. 
“Okay,” you say, and give him a warm smile for a split second before becoming stone-faced. “But if you drop me-”
“Don’t worry, I’ve got you,” Joel drawls.
He puts his arms around your waist, one of them catching the middle of your back, the other on a patch of exposed skin on your hip – your tank top has ridden up slightly with all the movement. You dig your fingers into his biceps, cling to him like he had hoped you would.
And even when he draws you back up, eyes locked with your own, your grip remains the same. You stay close. 
“My turn,” Tommy interjects, and Joel can’t help the dirty look he gives him over your shoulder. He’s playing the annoying little brother, doing everything he can to piss him off. His brother wants to see Joel break, but he’s not going to give him the satisfaction.
Plus, Joel is happy to dance with Sarah, which is the whole reason they came here in the first place. She’s so excited to be there, and he wonders if there will ever be a time when she’s too grown up for things like this. He hopes not. 
He ignores the sound of Tommy’s laugh mingled with your own. You were not laughing that much with him, and that causes a pang of jealousy. Joel doesn’t like acknowledging it, but he’s always resented Tommy for his ability to be the charismatic one, the charming one, the happy-go-lucky one. Even when they were kids. That’s what it’s like to be the oldest sibling. Never as fun, always more practical, more serious, the voice of reason. Always in service to their siblings, all in the name of love. 
Eventually, you and Sarah are back dancing together, and since you’ve had some practice separately, it’s not as sloppy as before. It allows Joel and Tommy to return to their post against the wall, just out of earshot.
Joel feels his brother’s eyes on him as he watches you and Sarah. “Dude,” he finally gives in, looks over at Tommy. “Just ask her out already.”
Joel rolls his eyes. “Tommy-”
“You’re into her.” 
“Maybe,” Joel says, because he knows it’s pointless to lie. “But she’s got a boyfriend.”
Tommy elbows him. “So what?”
“I know you’re alright bein’ a homewrecker but I-”
“It makes sense Joel. She’s fuckin’ smart, and funny, and pretty. And Sarah fucking loves her-”
In any other situation, he would’ve acted weeks ago. But he’s starting to understand why he’s dragging his feet. Tommy’s right. Sarah adores you. Joel will fuck something up, it’s inevitable. And when you decide you never want to speak to him again, Sarah will lose you too. He’s already let her down enough. 
“I should’ve never fuckin’ told you–”
“Take her to drinks, to the movies, dinner, show up at her house with a bottle of wine, hell, something. If you don’t ask her out already, then I will.”
Joel punches his brother on the shoulder. It’s not enough to incite an actual fight, but it’s definitely not playful. “Ow!” Tommy grips at his arm. “What?” When Joel doesn’t answer right away, he rolls his eyes. 
“Speaking from experience, I’m surprised you haven’t already,” he raises an eyebrow.
“Once, Joel. That was one time. Will I never hear the end of it?”
“No,” Joel says. “And I see what you were doing tonight, too. Don’t think you’re slick.” he hopes to change the subject, and it seems to be working. 
Tommy sets them back on track. “Well, I was just trying to get you to wake the fuck up and see what’s in front of you.”
“Uh-huh.”
“What happens when Sarah grows up? Goes to school, leaves the house? Then, what are you gonna do? You’re just gonna be alone?”
“You are treadin’ on some mighty thin ice, Tommy,'' Joel hisses. ““You barely know this woman-”
“I’d like a family, too, Joel. When that happens I won’t be able to keep you company anymore. You might want someone else. And maybe it’s not her, fine. But there should be someone.”
For as much as he hates to admit it, Joel knows Tommy is right. 
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
-April 25, 2003- 
It’s six at night. and you’re already in your pajamas. 
A couple years ago, you would’ve thought that was pretty sad. These days, it’s only a little sad. You prefer things this way. That’s the perk of being an adult living alone. If you want to put on pajamas before the sun sets on a Friday night, you can. If you want to get stoned on the back porch of the house you bought yourself, you can. If you want all those things to happen while you watch the sunset and listen to yacht rock, you can. And you’re going to. 
You’re toying with the new digital camera your brother bought for you. Vincent likes to argue with you, but he always feels guilty after a conversation gone wrong. Rather than use his words, however, he just buys you gifts. You had apologized over the phone a few days ago…this was his way of doing the same. The shutter clicks as you snap a photo of your backyard, and you look at it in the viewfinder before discarding the camera on your coffee table.
Martini is on the porch with you, doing that thing where he stands just out of reach but chirps at you until you pet him. When you reach out, he moves away. He’s not great at accepting what he wants. Maybe it’s why he’s sort of the perfect cat for you – you’re the same. 
You light your bowl, and you’re mid-inhale when you hear someone call your name. 
“Hey!” 
At this point, you’d recognize Joel Miller’s voice anywhere. You don’t want to admit it’s because you’ve tried to commit it to memory, daydreamed about how it might sound for his smooth lilt to read you a book until you fall asleep, or listen to him take a phone call in the other room. 
Realizing it’s him, you inhale sharply, forgetting what you’re in the middle of and taking a much bigger hit than you had intended. You begin choking violently on the smoke while simultaneously scrambling to hide your piece and the related paraphernalia sitting out, and manage to do so just in time for him to round the corner. 
You scramble to hide your bowl under the pillow of the outdoor couch you sit on, just in time for Joel to appear at the screen door. 
“Hey,” you say, covering your mouth. Your throat burns, and you cough again. Stay cool, stay calm. Everything is good. “What are you doing here?”
“Sorry, I tried your front door and you weren’t answering, so I thought I’d see if you were back here.” It’s hard to see him from here, through the door, and he’s backlit by the sun that’s shimmering behind his dark hair, catching it in a golden halo. 
You rise to open the door, and when you do, he continues. “I’m here to pick up Sarah’s soccer jersey.”
Right. Of course he was. She had left it a few days before, and you had assumed she’d come get it before her game on Saturday but it didn’t dawn on you until now that she ever had. 
“I would’ve sent her, but she’s at a sleepover tonight.”
“Oh yeah,” you nod, standing in place. You’re trying so desperately to act normal, words evade you.
Joel squints at you, a slight smirk on his face. “I didn’t catch you off guard or anything, did I?’
“No, no, not at all,” you lie. “Come on in.”
Joel steps over the tiny dish of cat food you’ve left on your back step for the stray you feed, and into the screened-in porch. Now that he’s under the dim light, you get a better look at him. A loose-fitting flannel hangs open over a worn green t-shirt that barely meets the top of his jeans. His hair is damp, like he’s just showered, and he smells clean. In any other situation, you’d want to climb him like a tree, and he’s not even trying. But right now, you’re just doing your best impression of a sober human that is definitely not doing anything illegal. The truth is, you should’ve made him wait outside.
“This is nice,” Joel says, looking around. And you really wish he wasn’t because you notice that you left the clear plastic baggie containing your weed out on the couch. It sort of blends in with the green floral pattern, so you hope for the best, because there’s no way for you to sneakily grab it without drawing his attention. “I didn't know this was back here.”
“The last owners added it on,” you say, because that was the type of thing the realtor had said to you about the features of this house. And you supposed a carpenter or contractor would probably be interested in it. It was a good distraction.
“I can tell. Looks new,” he looks up towards the wooden beams that span the ceiling. The top of the porch is still covered, so during the few times it’s rained, you always sit outside to listen.
“I’ve got her jersey in the kitchen,” you tell him. “Wait here.”
It doesn’t take long for you to pick out the bright blue athletic gear from your pile of dry cleaning. It stands out against all your neutral-colored pantsuits. Joel has his back to you when you return, one of his hands clenched into a fist. 
“Here,” you say, and he turns. 
“You had it dry cleaned? You didn’t have to do that.”
“I kind of wasn’t sure if it was safe to run through the machine,” you explain. “But now that I’m thinking about it….it wouldn’t make sense to give a bunch of 11-year-olds dry clean only jerseys.”
“It wouldn’t. But it’s probably more convenient than scrubbing the grass stains out yourself.”
“Speaking from experience?”
“Unfortunately. But again…thank you.”
“Of course.”
This is where Joel should leave, walk across the street, and go home. And he does, well, at least, he starts to. He steps away, reaches for the handle to your back door, and then pauses. “You know,” he says, glancing over his shoulder. “The Watsons were tellin’ me the other day you’ve been complaining about a family of skunks living under your house?”
You freeze, recalling the lie you’d come up with on a whim when your sixty-year-old neighbors had started asking too many questions. 
“Well, it does smell a little over here.”
“Uh-huh,” you give him nothing.
“Something like that….you should really call animal control. Get rid of the problem,” Joel’s facing you now, eyebrow raised. 
“If I call animal control…they’ll just kill them,” you answer. “And I don’t want that. So…I think I’ll just have to live with it.” 
“That’s fair,” Joel says. “But you know, Sarah’s over here all the time, and I’ve never heard her mention it.”
At this point you know he’s just fucking with you. But years of remaining stone-faced through business negotiations and family dinners has prepared you for this, so even if you’re a little stoned, you’re not going to let him win. 
“Yeah, it sounds like a coincidence. But they’re never around when she’s here,” you say, in your own defense. “Ever,” you add for emphasis. 
“I guess that’s good.”
You both stare at each other for a second, and your blood buzzes slightly because even though this is just a playful standoff, you’ve never made such intense eye contact with him. It feels electric. After what feels like an eternity, Joel lifts his hand from his hip, and you see what he’d been holding in his fist, now pinched between his thumb and forefinger. He raises an eyebrow.
When you see the plastic baggie dangling in front of your face, you purse your lips. “Alright, you got me,” you lift up your hands, but snatch the bag from him. 
“And here I thought you were such a good girl.”
You don’t even want to acknowledge the full body chill that runs down your spine at the sound of those two words, coming from him. Snatching the bag back from him, he gives you a cheeky smile. “If you give me a hit, I won’t tell anyone.”
Your jaw drops, and you look up at him. “Oh, you’re trouble.”
“I’m not the one lyin’ to my neighbors.”
“And I’m not the one snooping through my neighbors' things.”
“It was right out in the open.”
Joel doesn’t seem bothered at all. But it’s Texas, so you can never be sure. “Okay, fine,” you say. “If you want….I could roll us a joint. Unless you have other plans.”
“The alternative is a house to myself for the evening and some chores, so…yeah. Whatever you’d like.”
“Great.”
Joel follows you to sit on the couch. As you settle on opposite ends, he speaks up. “So you think you could explain to me why my daughter keeps tellin’ me she wants to be a lawyer?”
You snicker. “Believe me, Joel. I’ve tried to talk her out of it already.”
He chuckles. “It’s okay. Probably a more lucrative career than what I’m doing. She’s really taken a liking to you, you know that? I don’t think I’ve ever seen her warm up to anyone so quick.”
“Well, I’m the first adult she knows that’s not an authority figure.”
“I’m sure there’s more to it than that.”
“I remember being that age,” you look down at your work. “It’s nice to have someone older to relate to, who you can talk to without being afraid of getting a lecture.”
“She probably needs it,” Joel says. “She told me you talk about girl stuff. I’m not so great at that.”
“I don’t know,” Your tongue darts out to wet the edge of the paper and finish rolling the joint. You put it between your lips, and rummage through the drawer of the coffee table to find your lighter, gesture between the both of you. “This is about ninety percent of how I spent my time with my friends at her age…and so far you’re doing alright.”
“Now you’ve got me worried about what’s going on at that sleepover.”
“Okay, well, I was maybe a little older. And with her? You’ve got nothing to worry about,” you shake your head. 
He rubs the back of his neck, and his eyes glow with the reflection of your lighter as it’s flicked on. “I don’t know.”
“She’s fine, Joel,” you say, bringing the lighter closer and shielding the flame from the calm breeze of the evening. “She’s great. Really.”
“She is,” he agrees. You inhale, let the smoke settle in your lungs for a moment, before exhaling. You take your time, feeling warm from the weed and the feeling of Joel’s eyes on you, and he accepts the joint when you pass it over.
“I really didn’t really expect this from you,” he exhales, studying your handiwork before taking another puff. “You’re pretty buttoned up.”
“This is hardly rebellious.” Instinctually, you like the idea that he thinks you’re buttoned up. Deep down, however, you don’t actually want him to.
He looks so dreamy, the smoke curling though his eyelashes, tracing along his defined jaw, and then up, up, where it settles and shifts under the porch light, before disappearing completely.
Martini, who has been in hiding, hops up on the couch, and Joel reaches out, your cat nuzzling its face into his palm. “Didn’t know you had a cat,” he mumbles. And then, like some sort of magic, the cat plops down on Joel’s lap. 
“I do…but…” you say out loud, then trail off because you’re in such shock. You glance up at Joel, who looks confused. “I’m sorry, I’ve just never seen him do this.”
He passes the joint back to you. “Do what?”
You take a final puff, and then put it out in an ashtray. It’s only about half smoked, but you can get into it later if either of you wants to. Plus, you’re more interested in what’s unfolding in front of you. “I kinda want a picture of this.”
“What?”
“I’ve had him for five years and he’s never sat on my lap like that,” you say, and you can’t keep the resentment from dripping into your tone. “What makes you so special? I’m a little jealous.”
“Of me? Or the cat?”
Something honey-thick drips down your spine at his words. You can’t conjure a witty response, opting instead for: “Shut up.”
You snap a couple photos while Joel’s still laughing, one hand on his chest, the other on Martini’s back, and then put the camera down, and lean against the back of the couch, curling your feet underneath you. 
“You’ve got a nice view of the sunset,” Joel says softly.
There’s a distant fear you might never get to see him like this again, and you want to take him in fully before you drag your eyes to see what he’s looking at. Your backyard slopes down into a small patch of woods, the sky opening even wider to let in the aureate light. 
“I know,” you agree. “It’s why I spend so much time back here.” The high continues to settle over you, strokes your shoulders, tugs at the corners of your lips.
“Surprised you like things that are so peaceful…being from the city and all…”
“The city is peaceful,” you say, thinking of the leaves swirling from the trees in the fall, and the snowflakes falling onto your family's porch in the winter, melting on the tip of your nose as you lean over the balcony to see the glittering lights below, car horns and engines and sirens piercing the darkness, white noise. “In its own way.”
“You miss it?”
“Everyday,” you say. 
“What do you miss the most?”  
“Uhm…probably the bagels,” you lie. Well it’s true. But it’s not what you miss the most. You think of your brother, flopping onto your bed on a Saturday night – a rare weekend when you visit home – and you’re trying to read A Tree Grows In Brooklyn for school but he’s begging to take you around the corner to get a milkshake. It’s the image of him you’ve so desperately tried to cling to and the recollections you share with him have only gotten more and more unpleasant as time goes on. “The bagels here suck.”
“Really?” Joel seems amused by that. 
“And uh…I don’t know. It’s part of me. I have a lot of friends there, a lot of good memories,” you smile to yourself, lean forward towards him. “I had this apartment before I graduated, right? It had the best view of this little Italian restaurant, and I’d sit and watch people through the windows, eating and talking. I was supposed to be studying, but…it was great. I loved it.”
“What’re you doing here, then?” Joel asks, and you look back at the sunset. Here you are, waxing poetic and you’re sure he can hear it in your voice. “You runnin’ from something?” You look over to find he’s staring at you. Like he knows you aren’t being honest, and he’s asking you to stop lying.
So you do the only thing you can think of, which is to ask him a question in response. “What makes you think I am?”
Joel considers this for a moment. “I don’t know. I grew up in Austin. All my friends are here, my family. If I ever moved someplace else….it’d have to be for a good reason. And even if I did, I’d be lonely.”
You stare down at the floor. “Maybe I am.” Lonely? Or running from something? The answer is both, you know, but you’re not going to clarify. “My family. Things are pretty fucked. I thought distance would help, and it does, a little. But….that shit still follows you anyways. They’re always with you, no matter what.”
Joel nods. 
“But… I have a life here. When I lived downtown, I definitely did. I don’t mind the quiet, and….I have friends.”
Joel looks at you. “You got a boyfriend, don’t you?”
Why would he think that-oh. You had tried to forget it, the morning he’d caught you still wrapped up in your robe – not the fluffy fleece one you liked the most, but the one you specifically only wore when you had guys over, cause they loved that shit.
“Oh, right,” you say. “Bradley. Yeah, uh. He’s…he’s….not my boyfriend. But…” you shake your head. “It’s a little complicated.”
“I’m sure it ain’t that hard to explain.”
“I mean…” you avoid his eyes. “He’s kind of an asshole, but we’re not really commited to each other in a meaningful way. Plus, he’s not around that much which is kind of perfect…for me.”
“Really?”
“Less to worry about,” you answer, purse your lips. “But…I don’t know. I sorta wish he got my heart rate up a little more.”
“He’s not your type?”
“I don’t really have a type,” you shake your head. “I like what I like.”
Joel rasps. “I feel the same,” and he’s made sure your eyes are on him when he says it.
You swallow, nod, smooth your hair back. “Anyways. Why’re you asking me all this?”
Joel doesn’t seem to find an answer right away. You narrow your eyes at him, studying his face, looking for something that will give him away. It’s a trick you’ve learned…silence…a bit of skepticism. It makes people uncomfortable. And Joel shifts his weight, squirming beneath your gaze. Until something in his face shifts, and he smiles….just a little. 
“So that’s where Sarah learned that.”
“Learned what?”
“That look you’re giving me.”
“What look?” 
“Like you can see right through me.”
“Can I?” You narrow your eyes further.
“You’re tryin’ to.” 
He’d done a good enough job of avoiding your question, and you’re not gonna ask him again, and instead opt for a different one. “So what about you, then?” you poke his knee with your foot.
“Oh, I’m not answerin’’ that.”
“What? I just told you, that’s not fair.”
Joel runs a hand along his jaw, ponders. “Most women don’t want to be with a man who already has a kid so…things on that front are not always easy.” 
“I have a hard time believing that. I mean, don’t you have an upcoming date with Sarah’s teacher or something?” you tease.
“That’s not happening,” he assures you. “But….I work so much these days I don’t have the capacity for much. So I get what you mean, sometimes it’s easy to not get emotionally involved but…I’ve never really been great at that.”
“You’re a relationship guy?”
“I mean, Tommy has been pestering me about this lately. Says at this rate, once Sarah’s grown, I’ll end up old and alone. Annoys me to hell, but he’s right. I wouldn’t mind…some kind of companionship. Someone to tell you you’ve done alright at the end of the day.” 
“You sound awfully romantic,” you at him blink slowly.
“I can be, when I want to.” Joel rolls his eyes. “But right now…I think I’m just stoned.” 
That makes you giggle. So he’s just being honest. “I didn’t really see much great come from settling down when I grew up, so I’ve always been a bit of a pessimist when it comes to love. What you’re saying….it’s a nicer way to think of things.”
You rarely connected with the men you dated. You chose to date douchebags, to date cheaters. It was better that way, to know up front what you were getting yourself into. The best ones didn’t ask for much, just the odd fuck here and there for a couple months, and you’d step away when things were no longer fun, if they evewere to begin with. 
Actually getting married, settling down, didn’t feel like a real possibility for you. So you’d never allowed yourself to indulge in what seemed like a fantasy. Some women aren’t meant to be a part of a family. Your father had told you once – during one of few times he’d attempted to comfort you after your mother didn’t call on your birthday – as if it excused his own neglect. 
“Yeah, and it hasn’t all been bad. I mean, I’ve had a couple good girlfriends over the years. They were sweet, fun. I enjoyed the time I spent with them, they just…never made it through the real litmus test.”
“Sarah?”
He nods. 
“It would be hard, I imagine. For her. Accepting someone new into her life.”
“Yeah.”
“You really care about her,” you say. “About how she feels. It’s nice.”
“I’m doin’ my best.”
The way he talks about Sarah makes you nauseated. It’s something pure, and you can’t help but feel bitterly nostalgic. 
“I wish my dad would have been like you.”
It slips out, and you immediately regret it. It’s been too long since you’ve gotten stoned with someone else, and you’ve forgotten your filter. And even though you’ve already divulged more to him about you than you normally would, this feels like too much all of the sudden. 
This isn’t something you can backpedal, and before you know it, Joel is leaning towards you. There’s concern written in his features, he wants to comfort, and you thank God for what happens next, or it all would’ve been too much.
His shift in weight causes Martini to jump off his lap and sprint to the door of the porch. He stares at you and then meows. 
Even though Joel isn’t touching you, you have to tear yourself away from the hold he’s got you in. ““I gotta let him in, or he’ll get annoyed.”
You move to open the door, and the cat slips inside.
“Is that a guitar in there?” Joel asks, catching a sliver of the gleaming body in the dim light.
“Yeah.” 
“You play?”  He questions, and you come to sit back on the couch. 
“Not anymore. It’s more of a decoration. How about you?” 
“A little.”
“A little?”
“A lot.” Joel smiles, looks at the ground like not sure why he’s telling you this. “I actually uh, used to want to be a singer.”
“What?” you ask. “You’re kidding.”
“No,” Joel shakes his head. 
“Joel, what?” you put a hand on his arm and lean forward, then look at the guitar.
“Why not?”
“I was…young when I had Sarah. And I had to do something that could actually help us get by.”
“Okay well, you have to play me something, then,” you rise to step inside and retrieve it off the wall. 
“No, no-”
“Come on, please?” you ask. “Don’t be a tease.”
Joel just stares as you bring the guitar out to him. 
“Although this might be out of tune…” you strum once, and wince at the tinny sound it makes. “Definitely it is.”
“Here,” Joel takes it from you. “I can do it.”
It takes him a moment, but he’s plucking the strings in a way that feels so instinctual, purposeful, you can already tell he knows what he’s doing. Once he’s finished, he strums a few chords, and everything is magically in tune. 
“Alright,” you prompt, when he hesitates. “What are you gonna play me?”
“You know any Neil Young?”
“Of course,” you answer. 
Joel nods once, looks down at the guitar, and starts playing. You’d recognize the opening chords to anywhere, but he somehow makes them sound even moodier, and bittersweet. 
Come a little bit closer, hear what I have to say…
He can sing. You’re taken aback. You’re not sure what you expected, but it’s definitely better than that. Deeper, raspier, and now you have new information about him that’s going to bounce around your brain when you’re bored during meetings at work, while you’re lying in bed at night, trying to sleep. 
Because I’m still in love with you, I want to see you dance again…
You shift your weight, sling your arm over the back of the couch, and rest your chin on your hand. Suddenly, you’re feeling a little tired. He’s all-but putting you to sleep and, somehow, that feels like the highest compliment you can give. It could be because you’re stoned, but you feel warm all over. You close your eyes, just listen, until he’s finished.
Even after he’s finished, you keep your eyes closed, settling. Until you feel something graze against the back of your hand. Joel’s. He’s matching your own pose, facing you, but reaching out…
“That was nice,” you say, earnestly. You’re good.”
Joel smiles bashfully, tugs your hand from beneath your chin and pinches your index finger between two of his own. Your nails are painted a glittery purple, and Joel studies them. Sarah had painted them earlier this week when she’d hung out after school, and had picked out the color. 
“So are you,” he shifts closer. 
He’s not quite close enough to kiss you himself. But it’s enough…he’s just giving you the chance to lean in, to close the gap. The proximity makes you dizzy, and you’re a little overwhelmed. It’s too much. It’d be too much. You can’t. You’re afraid of what he might do to you.
“We should be good, then,” Gazing at him from under your lashes, you pull back just enough. It’s not a rejection, and you can tell he doesn’t see it that way either. There’s a mutual understanding, you’re on the same page, but you aren’t quite sure what it is. The warmth of Joel’s hand leaves yours, and a part of you is filled with regret.
And then, like it never happened, the two of you spend another hour talking. He’s engaged, intuitive, thoughtful, funny. By the time he excuses himself, long after the sun has fully dipped below the horizon, you feel like he’s an old friend. An old friend you want…badly, but, you know him on a level you hadn’t before.
“Gotta be up tomorrow for a soccer game, otherwise I’d stick around,” Joel says as you’re guiding him to the front door.
“It’s alright,” you say. “You’re welcome to do this anytime.”
“You sure?” he tilts his head, leaning against the doorframe on his way out. “You might regret offerin’ that….”
“I won’t.”
--
part iv
taglist: @yaskna@venomous-ko@lomljigg@yeehawbitchs@ay0nha @eldahae @lol-im-done@melancholicmelanin@reggies-floatie @omniscientqueer@superflymaterial@mikkorantanev@zbeez-outlet @nadja-antipaxos @strawberri-blonde @jabbajambler @ponyboys-sunsets @kyuupidwrites @r4efromvenus @loveatfirstsight-atlastsight @korianderbandit @nicoleoeoeoe @hotgirlsshareaccounts @madisonred88 @crustyrustydusty @sflame15-blog @issybee0611 @darkemeralddiamond @grandmana @totallynotastanacc @ay0nha
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rookdaw · 1 year
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monster X monster hunter
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hedwig221b · 2 months
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Thinking about my wip
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osamusriceballs · 10 months
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The Accident - Part IX
Atsumu x fem reader
Warnings: None
Words:- ~ 1,2 k
About: The phone call with Atsumu! What could he possibly want from you?
Part I II -> Next Part
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"Hello?"
"Y/n? It's me, Atsumu Miya."
You glance at Yachi with wide eyes, and she nods frantically, clearly excited by the call. She urges you to respond, gesturing for you to say something to him.
"Oh, yes. Atsumu. Is everything alright?"
"Everything's good. Don't worry. I just wanted to let you know that I've talked to my lawyer, and apparently, we both can't have the same lawyer for the divorce. I've contacted Samu's lawyer, though, and they're willing to help us out. I'll cover the cost, don't worry. They're discreet too, so we don't need to worry about the public getting involved." You try to focus on his words, but his voice flows like honey through the speaker, causing your heart to skip a beat. Yachi taps your shoulder, urging you to respond once again. You clear your throat and quickly start to answer.
"Oh. Thank you. I really don't know what to say. I've been thinking about the public, especially since I found out you're in the Olympic team. I was wondering if the situation would cause problems for you."
"No! No, yer not causing me trouble. It's not like we're under a dating ban. Most of us just try to be discreet about our dating life. Some fans are... a bit obsessed." There's a brief silence, and you debate if you should mention stumbling upon his profile and complimenting him for it. You're technically still strangers, yet it feels like you're the early stages of actually dating.
"But don't worry about that; your husband will take care of that, 'kay?" His tone turns playful, and you snort at the comment. "Okay. Let me know how I can help." You ease back into the couch, Yachi attentively watching you with a curious expression.
"Of course. You could start by telling me about your plans for next week. We need to talk to the lawyers; can you fit me into yer schedule sometime?"
"I have the next week off, so just let me know when works best for you." You smile at the thought of seeing him again, ignoring Yachi's encouraging grin.
"Sure. How about Wednesday? We can have dinner after the appointment; I can show you Onigiri Miya, if ya want? You can say no too; I just thought it would be a good idea to get to know each other. We started rather... unusually." Your cheeks heat up at the memory of how you technically met—waking up naked and married.
"Oh! That sounds lovely, actually. I've seen some pictures of Onigiri Miya, and I'd love to try Osamu's food."
"You've seen pics? Found my Instagram, didn't ya?" His teasing tone intensifies, and you feel even more heat rushing to your cheeks.
"I just- I wasn't trying to-" You stammer, the image of a shirtless Atsumu vivid in your mind.
"Just teasin' ya. Are you getting shy on me now? We literally slept in the same bed; I'd stalk my husband's Instagram too if I woke up married like that." He teases, and you can't help but get flustered.
"I wasn't stalking!" You clarify and clear your throat uncomfortably. "Did ya make sure to follow me? I wanna stalk my wifey too." He laughs, clearly unfazed by the situation, and his lightheartedness quickly transfers to you. "I didn't. I just had a short look; I don't know if I remember your username."
"Oh? You only remember the food on my page? Guess that's the only thing I'm good for. Only known for being the brother of the famous Osamu Miya, chef, and successful restaurant owner. I'll ask Samu to post some pictures of me to gain more followers." He sighs dramatically, and you snort at his exaggerated acting. "Did you just laugh? You seemed so tense before; I'm glad yer feeling better already."
"Thank you. I really appreciate everything." You smile, and even though you can't see his face, you're sure he's smiling too. "And I'll make sure to follow you. Maybe it will help raise your popularity- I want your volleyball career to thrive, after all." He laughs at your words, and you notice Yachi looking at you with raised brows, clearly curious about what you're talking about.
"Maybe I can finance us someday with my volleyball skills. Stick along, wifey. I'll get you an even prettier ring then." You blush feverishly and cough nervously while glance at the ring on the couch table. "The rings don't look too bad actually. The diamond looks almost real."
"Oh, about that. It is real, so make sure to wear it often to show off."
It takes you a few moments to process his words, and you take a sharp breath through your nose as you look at the ring. "What do you mean it's real? Like a real diamond?" Yachi stares at the ring too, and her mouth is agape as she hesitantly reaches for it, holding it in the light. It shines beautifully, and you lean forward to inspect it closer.
"Yeah, real diamond and all that. I found a receipt in my pocket. The rings are from a real jewelry store. I got the certificates for them too. I'll give you the one for your ring when we see each other again."
"I don't know what to say- Atsumu-" You hesitate, gazing at the ring once again. The diamond is not small, not overly huge, but tastefully big enough to shine brightly. "Don't mention it. We'll talk next week? I'll message you the time. I can pick ya up, or we can meet up there; I'm fine with both."
"Okay. Thank you. See you next week, Atsumu."
"See ya, wifey."
You hang up with a smile and stare at the screen for a few moments, until Yachi starts to laugh right next to you.
"'See you next week, Atsumu'- the way you made sure to say his name, ohh, y/n, you're crushing on him."
"I don't even know him, Yachi! And we're in no position to be liking each other; it's just business!" You shake your head and furrow your brows.
Atsumu is a nice guy. Funny, charismatic, kind. And extremely good looking. You know that you realistically have no chance to score a catch like him, and yet, you find yourself married to him. You wonder if he is regretting the whole situation, even though he seems to play it cool. He's on top of his career and you're just distracting him right now in this important phase. He's probably just worried about his reputation, worried that you'd go to the media and claim that he had forced you to do something. He might just be nice to you because he's scared- scared that you could potentially ruin his career. You need to make sure to always remember that and not to let his words get to you.
You'd have to make sure you don't fall for him— or else you'd end up with a broken heart.
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kamilah-is-queen · 2 months
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Sub Kamilah - Pt II.
Author’s Note: Hey everybody! I know I’ve taken a HUGE gap from writing fics/answering requests and being a part of the Kamilah fandom and so I’d like to extend my deepest apologies. I’m not going to give excuses, but the good news is I’ll be posting way more often than I did a few years ago. I hope the Kamilah fan base hasn’t dwindled too much, we’ve got to stick together and keep up the content!
P.S. What better way to get back into the hang of writing than with a highly sought after part 2 of g!p Kamilah. It’s VERY VERY SMUTTY, and there is no cut… so be warned!
Pairing: Kamilah Sayeed x MC (Amy Parker)
Warning: HOT HOT HOT SMUT!
Tags: @ta-sayeed, @kamilahtopme, @nydeiri, @rhonda-sayeed, @helpconfusedpersonhere, @millasayeed, @vonda-be-real, @livvynka, @queenkamilah, @leenasayeed, @skylarkxxyy, @choicesgrp, @ilove-kamilah-sayeed, @justavampirefan, @iamsimpforpoppy, @friendlybuddy
(Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list or have a fic request :)
Did you really think night one was over that fast? Ha, foolish mortal, this couple is far more vigorous and desire driven than you realize.
I still inside Amy, humming deeply into her back as I unloaded my seed deep inside her womb, my arms entangled around her body as she groaned into the silky pillows.
Her body revealed what her words couldn’t, the pleasure insurmountable and overwhelming as her body shuddered with each drop of cum I filled her with.
When I finished, I gripped her love handle and slowly pulled out, a soft squelch sound as cum flooded out of her wet folds, her folds visibly throbbing at the lack of attention.
She turned her head to gaze at me with her infamous doe eyes, silently pleading for more. To be manhandled and thrown around like a rag doll, fucked and breeded like a dog in heat, mercilessly.
That’s what her true desires were, her eyes, the key to that secret, spilling away all its treasures.
“Please…” Her voice raspy and high pitched, “more Kamilah. I need you, I want you all night long. I don’t want you to leave my pussy for a second, not even if it’s gaping wide and overflowing with your cum my love. Make love to me all night, and into the morning.”
I nuzzled the crook of her shoulder, effortlessly flipping her onto her back, my pupils blown as I gazed into her enchanting orbs. “Is that an order, or a request?” I playfully teased, grinning in my signature fashion that left her breathless.
Her arms looped around the back of my neck, not before she began stroking my tip against her clit. “An order of the highest rank, from your sovereign. Don’t upset me my warrior, not on our first night as married couple together.”
She inhaled sharply as I pushed into her, her hand guiding me in slowly as it was my turn to exhale deeply. “You’re such a bossy boo, you know that?” Winking, I began rolling my hips into a steady rhythm, my 11 inches spreading her already cum soaked walls further.
With a cheeky grin, she replied. “This is what you signed up for, no receipts accept-“
I pushed my complete length into her, my tip edging her cervix open as she cried out my name into the crisp Egyptian night. “Shhh, let me love you now. Let us make our family together.”
She gripped onto my shoulders for life, nodding rapidly and groaning as I began to pound, deep and relentlessly. “Oh my goddd, yessss…”
I could feel the tension between us mounting, almost at the breaking point as time seemed to slow and we began to quicken.
Her nails ripped deep cuts into my back, her cries of my name echoing throughout our villa and into the night sky full of pure pleasure and bliss.
“Amy, Amy I can’t hold on much longer…” My breaths were heavy as I howled in the pleasure/pain of her passionate grip, refusing to let me go or let there be any room for space between us.
My back arched as the cuts opened, a faint trickle of blood running down my back as I fucked Amy faster and faster and harder and deeper and whatever words can describe this moment of utter love.
It was too much. Her warm folds squeezed my cock without mercy, persistently throbbing, pleading for more cum. Her squeals and screams of my name echoing through my ear, her fingers clinging deep into my muscles…
It awakened an animal inside.
My eyes peaked blood red, my body taking control of itself, overriding my self control. Our bodies, our hips were clashing together in a bruising force, the slapping of our skins echoing for miles.
I saw nothing, heard nothing, felt nothing, except red. The warm, thick, succulent red blood that was pumping frantically inside her veins, the adrenaline flowing through the liquid honey, her fear and excitement coursing throughout her body as she too, became overstimulated.
Before she could blink, my fangs sank deep into her neck, piercing the jugular vein, my hot mouth already prepared for the warm ooze that would follow.
That’s when I heard the scream.
The gut wrenching, ear piercing, stomach twisting scream Amy’s body forced out, a scream of utter overexcitement, overexertion and overstimulation.
“KAMILAHHHHHH!!!!!!”
Her body thrashed in all directions, desperate to be relieved of the stimulation. Her body innately forced me away as she panicked, unable to breathe or think properly.
Her cum squirted everywhere, and when I say everywhere, I’m not lying. She soaked my legs and abs, the bedsheets and floor, even managing to spray the glass sliding doors too.
She couldn’t handle me anymore, her body was resisting in sheer pleasure at it all, yet I couldn’t stop. I tried to, the voice in my head screaming to stop and make sure she’s alright. But… I couldn’t. I wasn’t in control of myself anymore, I had unlocked the deepest and most darkest box of desires stored within, and I was certainly too high on its path to go back.
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boylebingo · 2 years
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ben x devi, gregory x janine, and tim x lucy are to 2023 as jake x amy, amy x jonah, and nick x jess were to 2015
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teabutmakeitazure · 4 months
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there is so much dialogue in this riney fic oh my lord
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spideysatan · 4 months
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life is great when you're not a HUGE bitch that is mad with life and love and whimsy and you can simply enjoy different love stories without comparing them
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Just checked the date and we've been up for a full week! Congradulations to me! Woo.
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tricksterlatte · 10 months
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Yearning for another fandom historical event that makes me feel the way I felt when they confirmed Tracer was a lesbian. Please...it was so triumphant
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tariah23 · 4 months
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keep going about goiji if you want, I love that ship!! It's like if your love interest was a god AND your really annoying capricious boss it's so fun ❤️
I looked up their their horoscope to check Goiji’s compatibility for the first time and it’s so ugly akkaaka
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oathofpromises · 11 months
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a flirtatious kiss on the back of the hand. (from a'atahni because he would, surprise me with any of your boys ajksdfhlaj)
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How long of a voyage had it been from Tural to Limsa Lominsa, Hiroto wondered to himself as he held his head. Shortly after turning twenty-eight, the elder Caelum left his home in an attempt to locate his younger sister, Stella. He had only heard murmurs of her escapades from passing merchants that she had become a Warrior of Light.
As the Viper settled into his seat at the local bar, a wave of queasiness washed over him, leaving him feeling slightly sea-sick. It was one of the reasons Hiroto couldn't stay out at sea for too long. It would leave him feeling very light headed. He gripped a glass of amber liquid in his hand, its contents offering a temporary respite from the unease that plagued him. As he sat there, nursing his drink, he couldn't help but dwell on the thought of seeing Stella once more. Although he was not one to indulge in excessive drinking, the mere mention of her name stirred a flicker of anger within him, coursing through his veins like a tiny flame. He loved her, there was no denying that. She was, after all his younger sister yet, in the depths of his heart, a storm brewed, threatening to consume him.
Could anyone truly blame him for feeling this way? The weight of his emotions pressed upon him like a heavy burden that he carried alone. From the moment his sister came into existence, he found himself in a world that was unfamiliar and devoid of companionship. His parents had remained with Stella and, for reasons unknown to him, had sent Hiroto away to Tural. Which ultimately meant there was little time to spare for him. Thus, he spent countless years in solitude, yearning for connection and understanding. In his soul, a profound sense of loneliness had settled, casting a shadow over his entire world. With each passing year, his heart had grown colder, its once tender and compassionate nature slowly hardening. At least to everyone around him. It was just how life had molded him, and a part of Hiroto hated that.
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Hiroto couldn't help but notice that someone had been lavishing him with their undivided attention. The way their gaze would caress his figure was just a tad more lingering than any casual observer would consider appropriate. Out of the corner of red eyes, the older Caelum caught sight of a man, his intense gaze fixated upon him, as he leaned against the pillar nearby. From the moment their eyes met, it was impossible to deny his breathtaking beauty. Yet, deep within the Vipers heart, a whisper of caution warned him that behind such captivating looks, there were almost always a hidden agenda. Maybe Hiroto would see how things played out. To gauge the desires of this individual, for the intensity with which their gaze caressed his physique, left no room for doubt. However, there was a part of Hiroto that felt there was so much more to this stranger than meets the eye. He could see that hint of loss behind those eyes.
Years spent immersed in the treacherous world of the Viper had imparted upon him a singular lesson. Leave them in a state of reflection, enticing them to return for further engagement; and in the event that they did not, it served as undisputed evidence that their motives were solely driven by a fleeting desire, devoid of any deeper connection. Nevertheless, this enigmatic individual proved to be quite indecipherable on occasion, his eyes engaging in a silent dance . Hiroto found himself pondering the question as to why he had been singled out amidst a sea of other individuals in the pub. Surely, there were plenty of other pretty people that this stranger could be flirting with yet, perhaps it was his way of disavowing the truth that he possessed an undeniable allure, at least from what so many had told him in the past.
Hiroto possessed an appearance that matched his ability to ensnare unsuspecting souls with a mere fleeting gaze. Such was the way of life he had been introduced into as a member of the Viper society. Void of his father's presence during his formative years, the young Caelum had no choice but to seek counsel from unsavory characters within the Viper ranks. The experience had bestowed upon Hiroto an invaluable wealth of knowledge, despite its arduous nature.
Hiroto's reverie was abruptly halted when he sensed a soft touch enveloping his hand, as if a delicate butterfly had landed upon it, followed by the tender caress of warm lips upon the back of his palm. It was a moment that often sparked the Viper's desire to flirt right back to tease them too, yet he unexpectedly found himself drawn into the depths of the other's captivating gaze.
"So…you've finally made the choice to grace me with your presence,you've been staring at me for quite a while since the moment I stepped into this bar. Don't think i didn't notice. Care to tell me your name or are we jumping right into flirting..." whispered Hiroto, as he raised his glass and took another drink. A faint blush spread across his cheeks, rather it was from the amount he had been drinking or that he was slightly touched deep down. There was an undeniable part of the Viper that felt curious about whom this person was and why did it feel like flirting was a wall they used to, forgot that pain that he could clearly see beyond those eyes. The same that was reflected in his own too.
"Order whatever you would like, it's on me. Now..care to tell me why you find me so interesting? Most people usually tend to ignore me unless I engage with them first. But where are my manners..my name is Hiroto Caelum.”
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daz4i · 1 year
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while I'm not one for romantic relationships or long term stuff i really do hope i meet someone who makes me feel big emotions again (spongebob getting a piano dropped on him meme. of the positive sort) somewhere. somehow. it's been so long. bc of shitty therapy i conditioned myself into stepping back and never letting myself feel and i just want to know someone who'd be able to make me break this conditioning and return that same amount of emotions too. one more time
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s0dium · 2 months
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𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔
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Synopsis: Ever wondered what JJK men with a heavy breeding kink would be like? Characters: Toji Fushiguro, Monsterform!Sukuna Ryomen, Gojo Satoru, Getou Suguru, Choso, Nanami Kento Warnings: Breeding, rough sex, praise, cum kink, Monsterform!Sukuna, masturbation, PUSSY DRUNK, fingering, nipple play, edging begging, mentions of pregnancy, mating press, overstimulation, marathon sex, degrading, cum kink, subspace, mirror sex, cowgirl
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Toji Fushiguro 
It's almost a little game of his, how many times can he cum in you.
Loathes condoms. Toji hates the plastic flimsy things, but after Megumi he would probably be more cautious, his pull out game becomes stronger
The type to keep you plugged up for a bit with his dick after he cums
If any slips out he will use his thumb to slip it back it
Probably doesn't even ask. Every time you fuck him he is gonna cum into you. Such a slut, you deserve it.
“You're doing such a good job baby, taking this like a champ,” Toji moans between grunts, his eyes closed, tips of his ears bright red from the pleasure, and his black hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. How long has Toji been dreaming about this exact moment? How many times did he fuck his fist to the image of how your pretty face looks right now? More importantly, he realizes, this is it, this is when he can fulfill his biggest fantasy that's been gnawing at his brain like a parasite; he can finally pump his cum into your sweet belly like he has fantasized about.
“Ngh~ too f-fast~” Tears trickled down your face and yet your hips were needly bucking up to take his dick like there was some how more of him to take. What a glutton for punishment you were, but soon that burning pain became something just as good, even better actually, delicious pleasure. You started to arch you back off the bed like a bow and you lock your legs around his back, holding yourself in place so he could fuck you like an animal. The sound of your hips meeting was so loud, that you were sure if any of your neighbors walked by would know what you were doing. Like you cared.
It's as if a primal need has taken hold of Toji, your pleas for him to slow down only go in and out of his ears. With every snap of his hips a creamy ring of arousal forms at his base from your arousal and his precrum. Each movement creates intense friction that heightens the pleasure and the collision of your bodies sends waves of ecstasy through you, making it impossible to hold back your moans. Each motion brings a profound sense of connection and exhilaration, intertwining you closer to the brink of overwhelming joy. The friction of Toji's dick rubbing your walls is enough to leave you breathless and eagerly anticipating each subsequent moment.
"G-gonna cum baby, your gonna take it." He is practically tumbling over his words now from the vice grip your pussy has on his cock. Thank god you are also nearing your peak because you don't know how much more your body can take, you need to use your legs tomorrow.
"Fuck fuck FUCK!" With a loud moan, Toji buries himself deep into your creamy pussy, relishing in the warm feeling, before pumping a heavy load of warm cum into your womb. His cum doesn't stop until your belly was swollen with the hot liquid and your toes curled from the pleasure. The heat spreads through your body, driving you to the edge of pleasure. The overwhelming sensation finally takes over, pushing you into a state of pure ecstasy.
As your pussy convulses, Toji doesn't leave the warmth of your cunt for a second, keeping you plugged and stuffed with his cum.
"Fell so good princess, ya feel like heaven."
Gojo Satoru 
You question whether this is all a dream. It's utterly euphoric, enveloped by every aspect of Gojo—his heady scent, the warmth of his skin, and his mesmerizing voice echoing in your ears. It's a sensory overload that feels almost too intense to be real.
“Oh, where did you float off too, princess?” he coos, watching the glossy, faraway look take over your eyes. Despite this, Gojo keeps up his brutal pace his breathing becoming jagged and irregular. There’s no warning when he comes.
"Love you," you babble, "Love you so much please c-cum in me." Your words are strung out on your lips from how fucking good you feel. As you succumb to each of his forceful, fast movements movements, waves of intense pleasure cascade through you.
“Shit” Gojo spoke through a gritted smile as he blew his load. Almost as if he was unfazed by his ejaculation, Gojo keeps sliding his member in and out, his milky semen leaking out as he continues to push into you relentlessly, not loosing a second of speed.
The sounds, god the sounds where sinful. Wet skin against skin echoed through the room the sloshing of cum trapped inside you, his thrusts are not only slicker and frictionless with the help of his hot cum,
“M-mhm..” your humming earns a guttural groan from the male above you, “m’ Please don't stop Satoru please don't stop” you cry, and how could he not? Of course, he was going to fuck his second load into you especially when you asked so nicely.
Geto suguru
Above all else, Geto Suguru is a family man
There is nothing more he wants than to see your belly round with his kid, to watch your breasts swell with milk
“Fuck princess you feel so fucking good.” Geto’s words come out accompanied with a chuckle, basking in the way your walls hug his dick.
Straddling Geto Suguru, you feel the solid strength of his arms as he effortlessly lifts you up and down his dick. Each controlled movement is a testament to his power, his hands firm and guiding. Your body has gone slack at this point, the muscles in your legs too tired from its constant tremblings and tightening due to how deliciously he fucked you. Good? Try Euphoric. You were in heaven from the way the tip of his fat dick collided with your gspot. He uses you like a sex toy, shaping your walls with his cock.
Long stray black strands of hair fall from his loose bun as he leans over to whisper into your ear. “Want me to fill you up don't you? Watch you grow round our child—” One of his thumbs rolls over your hardened nubs as he gropes at your chest, causing you to keen at the added stimulation, "These will fill with sweet sweet milk, we’ll make sure there’s enough to share with me. Isn’t that what you want?”  Geto’s balls slap against your ass every time you bottom out on his dick.
“Oh fuh-“ His voice comes out breathless. You can feel each harsh contraction of his balls while he creams inside your pussy, such a tight fit that a ring of it seeps out at the base of where he’s connected to you. 
Choso
Choso cant count the number of times he’s touched himself to the thought of filling you up with cum over and over again, till glistening tears streamed down your pretty face and you were meekly begging him to stop. 
He doesn't know why but to Choso, its almost instinct to breed you up, and how could he resist? From the way your hips swayed to your honey-coated whines that escaped your mouth when he aggressively kissed you, you were practically asking for it. 
“Cho~!” you coo, reaching up and planting messy kisses along his chin. Heavy, hot pants escaped both of your mouths as your hips struggled to meet his brutal pace, to no avail.
Quite frankly Choso didn't know how much longer he could keep this up, of course, he knew you’d feel good, but not this good. Fuck, his fleshlight felt like sandpaper compared to the way your gummy walls sucked and spasmed around him. 
“Fuck me fuck me fuck me please don't sto-” You cut yourself off with as squeal when you felt Choso pull out for a quick second before slamming back into you with a grunt; the nearly inhumane girth of his cock making you dizzy at the surprise entrance. 
“Mm’feel so good baby, m’so good y/n” Choso whines were muffled due to how his face was buried in the crook of your neck, your scent only serving to bring him closer and closer to the edge. “m’ gonna cum- princess m’gonna cum inside.” he cuts of with a groan of his own, shooting thick white ropes of his cum into your walls.
Nanami Kento
See the thing is, Nanami didn't even know he had a breeding kink
It wasn't until he came in you for the first time, it wasn't until he watched it spill out and cover your pussy in a creamy white glaze that he became addicted. 
From that point on, Nanami loathed condoms. 
The side of your mouth was a mess of dripping drool. Legs spread apart by the crooks of his elbows, you let our a strangled whine as you watched Nanami hammer himself into you like a starved man. 
“Nanami!” you sob, reaching up to bury your face in his neck, “Please cum in me please!”
“F-fuck y/n, what did you just say?” He groans, brows furrowed and arm muscles straining as he continues to hold your hips in a death grip and fuck you. You met his stare, breathing heavily with sweat dotting your brow.
“I-I, want you to cum in me… please.” Brown eyes widen at your words, causing a warm rush of pleasure to spread through your tummy and tighten the coil.
“Oh, you filthy little fuck.” His movements began with renewed vigor, hips snapping against you almost painfully as you moaned without restraint. You felt full; completely stuffed by Nanami as he stretched your hole with every thrust.
Sukuna Ryomen
One of the many kinks the curse has
Nothing, and he means nothing is more satisfying than pressing down on your tummy and watching the load of cum spill out from you.
And whats the harm if you get knocked up while he’s at it? The king of all curses needs an heir anyways. 
A hum of satisfaction escaped as he watched your used battered body twitch in the reflection of the mirror every time Sukuna teasingly rubbed your clit in half circles with his thumb. 
“Beautiful girl, such a natural submissive”.
Two of the curse's other muscular hands played with your nipples, twisting and running over them with his index finger and thumb, flicking over them like one would turning on and off a light switch. How long have you been sitting in his dick, letting fingers work your clit and nipples to the very brink of a mind splitting orgasm, only for the high to be snatched away from you?
“Look at you” Sukuna hummed, his giving a teasing thrust right into your cervix making you gasp for air. You needed more movement, you needed friction; sitting on his dick spread in front of a mirror wasn't enough. “So needy, so fucking greedy for everything that I’m giving you.”
“I want m-more!” you sob, your body hyper-aware of how fast his fingers moved over your clit.
“Don't worry little thing, I’ll fill you up soon.”
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tytonnidaie · 1 month
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the most dangerous part of having a pet au that u never seriously work on except think abt it to ur writing playlist as u drive is that. you develop it. and it gets better. and then you really really want to write it. and you're in danger
#laughs in 5 ongoing fics#to be fair. i started them in 2019 and have updated them only like twice#so my readers know i am very slow#however thats why i can only talk abt this on this blog. bc if those guys find out im indulging other ideas i will get#well. nothing. nobody talks to me and only like 5 people actively keep up with me#but i will disappoint those mutuals and have to commit seppuku#anyway its precisely bc the bnha ending was so milquetoast that i have evolved this stupid fic#ah yes the story abt the children suffering due to the wrongs of the adults and trying to fix or burn the world and dying for their parents#ends with... nothing changing#and in fact. the parents get redeemed where the children must die#however. a story where that happens AGain however the main weapon of the children against the system is the reanimated no1 hero?#yeah.......#children who are hurt and angry and have the power to do something serious about it is my fav shit. sorry#and u know who has to fix it all and burn it all down properly this time? the guy with severe issues.#fellas is it gay to fall in love with your best friend and rivals reanimated corpse who came back wrong#however its still the closest you'll ever get to having him back#but you cant tell him you love him bc he;s not the same. he's not the one you've always loved#and then loving him as the monster they turned him into feels wrong but you do it anyway#he died for the system you're upholding even if its wrong. what are you supposed to do#now he is literally destroying that same system. do you choose your boss or do you choose the guy that used to know u the best in the world#i havent decided yet. i got distracted by the tragedy#anyway th story is that our protagonist ends up in possession of the reanimated hero bc of a quirk mishap kind of#and to curb his aggression to anyone that isnt the protagonist . they get him to play league of legends#bc he can vent his violent tendencies without anyone actually getting harmed. and accidentally becomes a ranked player#he doesnt eat or sleep so all he does in the handful of hours the protagonist has to crash is absolutely wreck shit online#“hey can i come over and see our friend who came back wrong?” “no the sight of a human will send him into a kill spiral.#however you can play video games with him as long as u dont mind getting killed a million times."
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titsthedamnseason · 3 months
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yall were right about chloe liese this whole time. willaryder hits so hard
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