#ask a jaywalker

[jaywalkerss]

Thoughts on my cat

(If you say anything negative I will steal your mushroom)

xx

i love tori with my whole heart shes my darling my baby my one true love

you should spoil her rotten

[oifaaa]

Sorry if you’ve been asked this before, but since they live in New Jersey, which of the batfam do you think can pump their own gas?

This fact about new Jersey annoys me so much I don't know why it annoys me but is does anyway Cass is the only one who can't pump their own gas even if she's in another state or country she will get someone else to pump her gas

[pestorik]

there's something I just love about crocodile Sebek I wanna see him doing gator things I think I love him better than human-y Sebek

honestly ive been so happy with the response to sebek bc i was actually not feeling as confident w him as i was w the other 3. hopefully i can do some little sketches w him soon, im imagining him going totally overboard in fights, like some rando has vandalized a brick wall and instead of tackling him sebek shoots lightning and fries him to a crisp in the middle of town square

[myfandomrealitea]

Is it true that some crimes can be worse than the other crimes?

This has to be bait.

[beanmanhard]

they exported my fav little guy from one funny country to another

[metamatar]

god it is so humbling to move to a new country even when you know the language

[mokkkki]

MOKIIII THE COMMENT YOU JUST LEFT ON MAKING GHOSTS???? IM LITERALLY ON THE FLOOR????

i read it at work (my manager just left me go an hour early) and i was . smiling like a fool . holding back tears . acting all suspicious and hiding my phone whenever one of my coworkers got close . ANYWAYS IT MADE MY DAY

it might be one of the best comments i’ve ever gotten.. and the fact that it came from u makes it even better..

also i wouldn’t have complained if u had simply pointed out what u could’ve done better bc a buzzfeed unsolved au with jegulus sounds like a fucking Dream

duuuuude, thats so sweet of you! seriously, making ghosts deserves it, it's the happiest, messiest little piece of literature ive read recently and im enamored by it <3 you deserve all the praise

[clearbun]

you guys should send me ideas for more stupid fma tier lists i need to make more of them

[dayurno]

how medically inaccurate is aftg dr dayurno ?? bcs tho i might not work in ur field, even to my ignorant mind many things made me pause.

GUYS PLEASE I AM NOT ACTUALLY A DOCTOR OF ANYTHING i work in tech………….!! at best im a doctor in kevinology nothing more nothing less…….. i really wouldnt know at all 🥹

[moondal514]

aftg mixtape fic for the wip game????

WIP Game

Hi Róisín! Thanks for the ask <3

Yeah so my og draft for AFTG Mixtape was gonna be a mafia au of sorts (so canon but no exy lmao) but I had so much fun writing the pre-canon bits that what I ended up writing turned into a canon-compliant Aaron character study instead.

Basically the twinyards get estranged during college because Andrew gets involved in the mafia for Neil and Kevin reasons and Aaron gets involved with Katelyn. Both of them feel like the other is breaking the deal, but unlike canon they don’t talk about it and after they graduate they go their separate ways and don’t talk to each other for the duration of Aaron going to med school (except Andrew paid for Aaron’s med school tuition).

Except at some point Andrew starts breaking into Aaron’s apartment or office where he works every time he’s injured. And that becomes a thing, weird twinyard bonding via Aaron giving Andrew medical treatment. Aaron is lowkey glad Andrew does this cuz it’s the only way he knows he’s alive but he’s also kind of upset that he can’t have a normal relationship with his brother. Things come to head when Andrew gets hurt badly enough that he can’t come to Aaron himself and Neil has to be the one to call Aaron. Then they have a big dramatic blowout involving crying and yelling but by the end of it they’re better off.

Anyways, here’s a snippet:

Katelyn greets Aaron when he gets home and he sinks into her arms with a sigh. Her scent is a familiar comfort. He breathes it in and feels himself relax. She leads him to the table where she’s already arranged the Chinese take-out she picked up on her way home from the only place still open at midnight. It’s some ungodly hour of the morning but neither of them have eaten dinner. They both load up their plates and start eating.

He asks about her hospital shift. She tells him about it, the well-trodden path of routine small talk. He smiles watching Katelyn speak, impassioned about the frustrating antics of a co-worker and a difficult patient.

She asks him about his day. He tells her the mundane bits. The excitable children, and the annoying parents. Paperwork, so much paperwork, and insurance companies. Anything to talk around the elephant with his face.

When Aaron run out of words, he stops talking and stares at his plate, pushing around the bok choy he didn’t eat with his fork.

Katelyn takes his other hand. She waits for him. She has always been the only person willing to wait for him. He shouldn’t burden her with this.

He blurt out, “I saw Andrew today.” Katelyn’s hand tightens around his. He regrets saying anything.

“How is he?” she asks. Her voice is tentative. Aaron is not surprised. She doesn’t exactly have the best history with his brother.

“Same as always. He was fine, for the most part. He just needed a bandaid.” Aaron snorts and shake his head.

He doesn’t hide anything from Katelyn. She knows about as much of what Andrew does as Aaron, which is not much at all. Simply that it is dangerous and shady and thinking about it too long makes Aaron want to punch a wall.

“I just wish—“

Wish I had a normal brother. A brother that calls me regularly instead of breaking into my office. A brother I can invite over for dinner, tell people about, see and text whenever I want, celebrate holidays with—

A brother that wants me.

Aaron can’t say it out loud.

Katelyn draws Aaron into a hug. He buries his face into her shoulder. She leads him to their shared room, gently bullying him through the motions of getting ready to sleep. She curls around him in bed and Aaron lets the comfort of her presence sooth him into oblivion.

[jaywalkerss]

💩💩

💩💩💩💩

💩💩💩💩💩

...

i had this coming.

i thank you for your bounty, and regretfully accept

[rotisseries]

braving the big scary of the ask box to tell you’ve got an awesome cock ❤️‍🔥

forgot about that post for a second and just looked at this like. thank you🤨🤨🤨🤨

[lightgaswaterelectricityrent]

Every holy week I am forced to reckon with the rememberance that once in college I sent this to my friends I went to church with and one of them replied "I don't think that's very funny." 😶

[pancakeofsin]

your artstyle is such a cool fucking thing I don't think I have told you enough times how much I adore the way you draw and make use of crosshatching (is that what it's called?)

thank youuuuu pls have some art of my beloved daughter, beatrice

((and yes, it's cross-hatching or just hatching!))

[rillette]

happy new year its now legal to jaywalk in the state of california

Was it not legal before or did they just give up trying to pretend anyone cares about not jaywalking 😭

[anxious-lorf]

Decided on a whim to make another jaywalking tier list, this time for the non-story Rare Blades of XC2