#ask me about the significance of these albums if you want!

[valeriianz]

9 Albums That Made Me ✨

tagged by @seiya-starsniper @virgo-dream & @tj-dragonblade

first of all, please excuse the terrible image quality (and lines) i made this in MS paint and it took WAY TOO LONG!

anyway, i agonized over this one because, like Seiya, i define my life more in songs than albums. sure i bought CDs as a kid, but it was always only to pick through the tracks i liked and burn a mixtape. but each of these albums i like almost if not completely cover-to-cover, and they each remind me of a moment or turning point in my life.

(not tagging anyone because this trend seems to have died and i havent a clue who did this already lol)

[bts-hyperfixation]

What do you think the boys would've done on their last nights with their significant others before joining the military?

Some of these are last nights, others are full days. Also only Taes has explicit smut mention, although most mention sex in some fashion

Please send me asks to keep me motivated while I'm off work! Thirsty thoughts, Most likely to, reactions, life updates, and general gibberish welcomed!!

Namjoon: 

I think Namjoon would've wanted a quiet night. He was probably stuck at work trying to finish plans on that Instagram account that's still posting and maybe fiddling with the album we know he started. But he would have tried his hardest to put it down and return home by nine to spend time with his loved one. His partner would be waiting for him with a simple takeaway on the table and maybe a TV show they had been watching together queued up. They'd stay cuddled on the couch for the longest time. They'd maybe fall around but not get anywhere (Something Namjoon regrets by day 3 in the barracks), maybe they intended to have sex one last time before he left but neither wanted to acknowledge it was actually the last time. He would talk about how this was ridiculous, it's not like they'd be 18 months without one another, just a couple of months at a time is all... And then he'd get sad and introspective. They'd fall asleep on the sofa because going to bed would bring their last night to an end and Namjoon doesn't want to willingly relinquish that time. 

Seokjin: 

I think he hired out a restaurant he and his partner like, maybe even their first date restaurant. The partner actually panicked that Jin was going to propose the night before he left and was ready to yell at him if he pulled out a ring. Jin sets up multiple proposal cliches throughout the evening giving his partner a heart attack each time while he acts nonchalant about it, pretending he doesn't know why they are getting worked up. This is stuff like a jewellery box on the table (It's a necklace), A gem in the champagne (It's tiny ice), He kneels by the table (and ties his shoe). They take a long walk by the river after dinner, his partner increasingly exasperated but still very fond. He finally does pull out a ring, but he insists it's only a promise ring and the real ring will be given to them on June 14th 2024 (Doesn't want to share the anniversary). The evening probably ended with some very slow, heavy eye-contact, love-making

Yoongi:

Disclaimer - I'm not 100% sure if Yoongi had to go anywhere for any length of time... but this is written as if he were doing the same as the other boys. 

He cooked dinner, something he is gonna claim is simple, but he took all day to make it. He also lay the table with a white tablecloth, dimmed all the lights and set out candles. Flower petals lead you through different stations of the apartment. First appetizers and cocktails on the sofa so his partner can talk about their day, then to the table for the main course, to the bathroom where bubbly and strawberries await next to a warm bath for two, and finally to bed for dessert. Which actually meant dessert, there's a snack platter of sweets in the centre of the bedspread and a movie queued up on the TV. the movie wasn't really watched... but the thought was there.

Hoseok: 

I feel like Hobi made an entire day out of it, he set aside time to make sure he only had his significant other to focus on and made sure his SO did the same so they were uninterrupted. Then he locked them into their apartment, only opening the door to bring in food deliveries. The day starts with lazy morning sex. Then breakfast. Then lazy shower sex. Then maybe some TV time, where his hands remain firmly on his partner as if they are going to disappear the second he lets them go. The SO convinces him to go for a walk at lunchtime, they hold hands the entire time. Hoseok has them sit in his lap when they return home. Just wants to be permanently close. The third round of sex is definitely more driven, like he has a point to prove and doesn't want his SO to forget what exactly it is they are going to be waiting so patiently for. 

Jimin: 

Jimin took his SO back to his home town a couple of days before. Maybe spent some time with his family in Busan, had a very nostalgic craving for his parents cooking and took his SO along for the ride. They do stuff he liked to do as a kid, visiting places that he wouldn't be easily recognised. He's anxious, and jumpy, and clingy a lot of the time. He keeps asking his partner if they are going to be okay when really it's his own insecurity. Jimin had someone drive them in a nice car back to Seoul in the early afternoon so they had the evening together, they probably fooled around in the car as he tried to keep himself occupied. He let them hold his hand while he had his head shaved, needing the familiar reassurance. He took a break to show Army his hair, but the SO is hiding behind the camera. Then the evening is spent quietly, wrapped together to enforce the fact that they aren't going anywhere.

Taehyung: 

He came up with so many different plans for what he wanted to do that by the time the day came around he hadn't actually implemented any of them. And sure he is Taehyung of BTS, if he had made a couple last minute phonecalls he could have made anything happen but he decides the lack of plans is exactly what was meant to be. He runs on pure unplanned whims and ends up taking his SO to absolutely anywhere that pops into his mind in the most chaotic fashion. They go to the movies (Something everyone's already seen so no one else is there) (they may spend most of it making out in the back). They go to an arcade (An old buddy of Tae's owns it and makes sure they get an hour uninterrupted). They eat lunch at the SO's favourite restaurant. Eventually, they go home and Taehyung spends hours between his lover's thighs, trying to immortalise the taste of them in his brain before he no longer has the access he so desperately craves. They probably also have a lot of sex. He falls asleep insisting on cockwarming, convincing his partner the UTI will be worth it with the Tata mic face. 

Jungkook:

It takes a while for his SO to convince him to do anything at all because "What's wrong with in my arms in my bed forever?" (And he's right, nothing wrong with that and if his SO don't want it I volunteer). He convinced them to snuggle back down with him at least three times until lunch rolled around and they insisted he get up with them to go somewhere. They never end up leaving the house. Every time his SO goes to put on a shirt, Jungkook grabs it and throws it somewhere it can't be easily recovered. There was one in the sink with the dirty dishes, one mixed with the already dirty laundry, and another hanging from a light fixture they would both need a ladder to reach. Eventually, the SO has to relent because they won't have any shirts to say goodbye in the following day. So they succumb to his wishes (Although they make him go out to fetch food first). He holds on to them possessively throughout the day, pulling as much of them against him as is reasonable at any given time. I fully believe Jungkook would crawl into the skin of an SO if he thought it was possible. 

[jollytaleswriter]

Angelica

pairing : harry styles x fem!reader

summary : harry is writing his first album and y/n is on her summer break, what happens when they meet during their holiday in italy?

contains : summer fling, fluff, allusion to smut but no smut

word count : +4.5K

author's note : angelica flowers are associated to inspiration

I do not give consent for my work to be plagiarised, translated or reposted on any other platforms

pinterest board | harry masterlist

It was the end of June.

Following the itinerary her phone had given her to find her accommodation, Y/N felt hot and cursed her past self for deciding that wearing jeans on the day she travelled to Italy was a good idea.

When Y/N finally arrived at her destination, she searched for the reservation paper in her handbag that rested on top of her suitcase before typing the four-digit code the landlord had given her to enter the apartment block. Suddenly, before Y/N had the chance to reach for the door knob, a man came out of the building.

The man greeted her and, noticing her suitcase and travel bags, asked if she was renting a place for the summer, to which Y/N nodded.

"So am I. I’m Harry, by the way." Harry smiled from ear to ear and held out his hand for Y/N to shake.

After Y/N had introduced herself, Harry offered his help to carry her luggage because it was a pain in the ass without an elevator. Y/N gladly accepted and when they had made their way upstairs, they were both pleasantly surprised to see they would be neighbours for the summer.

"I’ll see you around then." Was the last thing Harry had said to Y/N before he left her to unwind and unpack her things.

The flat was small but cozy and it gave a wonderful view on Levanto’s beach.

Done settling down and tidying her things, Y/N let herself fall on the bed and let out a satisfied sigh. She was happy to be here. Having just passed with flying colours her final exams of the year, Y/N wanted to take time for herself. She desperately needed to spend her summer in a sunny and tranquil place so as to let go of all the stress college had put her through.

Y/N had not had a proper holiday in a while and, having always dreamed of travelling to Italy, she immediately started looking for an affordable accommodation to rent when she read about Levanto whilst organizing her trip. Which, luckily, she found. Y/N was not wealthy by any means but working as a waitress in a two-stars rated restaurant paid well and the little yet significant amount of money her parents had gifted her after her finals had enabled her to put enough money aside. Hence the decent budget for her time in Italy.

Apart from a couple of day trips, Y/N’s only plan was to rest, read and bask in the sun. Relax before entering her last year of university. La Dolce Vita, as the Italians called it. Speaking of which, maybe Y/N would take this opportunity to improve her Italian, she only knew basic phrases.

The sound of her phone buzzing caught her attention. Y/N grabbed it and checked her messages.

Iris : hope you had a safe trip. Text me when you arrive xo

A smile tugged at Y/N’s lips and she swiftly typed her answer. She and Iris were practically attached to the hip but as Iris had already planned to visit her family over the summer, she hadn’t been able to accompany Y/N on her adventures. It was a shame but they would keep in touch and hang out as soon as Y/N was back home.

She scrolled through her phone for a few minutes before Iris answered her text by asking Y/N to call her once in a while to catch up and demanding that Y/N keeps her informed if she met someone.

Although her friend’s text made her think of Harry, Y/N rolled her eyes and sent a will do. After that, Y/N headed to the bathroom to take a shower and pamper herself before picking a cute summer dress of a mid-thigh length for her evening out.

A quick research on the internet allowed her to find a restaurant nearby. Feeling ravenous, Y/N decided to not wait any longer and took her purse and her book and left.

The restaurant was a short walk away from Y/N’s accommodation. It was small and a little bit hidden but it seemed comfortable.

Y/N ordered a cocktail and was about to skim through the menu when one of the waiters introduced the artist who was going to perform that evening.

Y/N instantly recognized Harry as he climbed on the dais that had been put there for the occasion. Guitar in hand, he waved shyly to his audience. "Tonight’s a special night for me because the songs I’m gonna sing for you are ones that I’ve written myself and it’s the very first time I’ll be singin’ them to a public."

People clapped their hands after his admission to encourage him and just as Harry started singing, his gaze met Y/N’s. The grin that appeared on his face told her he had recognized her too. They were not able to keep their eyes off of each other until the end of the show.

A round of applause was heard as Harry thanked the audience and the restaurant for letting him perform.

Everyone talked about Harry. Some, mainly girls, even walked up to him to whisper a few kind words to him.

Y/N observed Harry putting his guitar back in its case. She debated with herself whether or not she should go and talk to him but he beat her to it.

"Fancy seein’ you here."

Y/N smiled. "Nice to see you too. You were great up there."

"Yeah ? You really think so ?"

Y/N nodded. A boyish smile tugged at Harry’s lips and the pink tint on his cheeks betrayed the fact that he was flustered by the compliment.

Harry asked if he could join Y/N for dinner to which she replied positively. He took a seat in front of her and they both proceeded to look through the menu. They both opted for a plate of pasta and after ordering their food, they carried on their conversation.

Harry revealed that not only was he a musician but he was also a baker. He had been working in a bakery in London for years and would play music in his free time. When he turned eighteen, Harry started performing in bars and until now, he had only sang covers. Over time, as he grew more confident in his skills and talent, Harry began to work on his own album. He had been writing songs for ages and he was particularly proud of the ones he had written and composed for this project. However, Harry was now facing a case of writer’s block. He had ideas that never seemed to be good enough and he struggled to get the words out. Therefore, his friends, who were also his band and accompanied him during his gigs, advised him to take some time off and try not to pressure himself. On second thought, Harry decided to take his friends’s advice and his lack of inspiration was the reason why he was in Italy.

Y/N eagerly listened to Harry’s story as they enjoyed their meal. He asked her what she was doing for a living and Y/N told him about college and her degree to become a teacher.

They had so much to talk about that they did not see the hours pass and they only left when a waiter politely interrupted them to ask them to leave because they were closing. Harry and Y/N paid and walked home together. Before parting for the night, they exchanged their numbers.

****

The sound of her phone vibrating on the table reached Y/N’s ear. She put down her book and grabbed the device.

It was a text from Harry.

Care for an ice cream ?

Always. Give me ten minutes. Was Y/N’s eager answer. She quickly changed her clothes and went to the bathroom to freshen up before leaving, not forgetting to take her purse and her keys.

No sooner had Y/N knocked on Harry’s door than he let her in like he had been impatiently waiting for her to show up.

"So there’s a great ice cream shop near the restaurant we were in the other day. I was thinking we could go there." Harry said as he put on his shoes and Y/N hummed in agreement.

Fifteen minutes later, Y/N and Harry were queuing at the ice cream shop behind a couple holding hands and a mother whose two yound children were jumping around. Y/N had already settled for two scoops of strawberry ice cream. Harry on the other hand could not seem to be able to choose. He hesitated between a couple of flavours.

"Just take two flavours tonight and we’ll come back tomorrow so you can get different ones." Was Y/N’s advice. Harry’s shoulders relaxed and he let her order her dessert first while he made up his mind.

"So we’ll come back tomorrow, huh ?" Harry smirked as they got out of the shop.

"Hm ?"

"You said we’d come back tomorrow."

"I mean, you, uh, you don’t need me to come back."

Harry breathed out a laugh. "I was just teasing, I’d love to do this with you again."

Harry suggested that they went to the beach so as to watch the sunset. Y/N eagerly accepted the offer and they decided to sit on a bench that stood near the stairs that led to the beach.

Y/N told Harry about her day, how she explored Levanto’s historic center and enjoyed the afternoon at the beach. They talked about music a lot—they had found that they shared a common interest for Fleetwood Mac—and Harry opened up about his love for Italy.

It had all started when Harry was just a kid. He and his family had spent the summer holidays in a seaside town of the Northern coast of Italy. He had promised himself he would come back and he cherished these memories with his family with all his might. Now that he was on an artistic retreat, Harry figured it was the chance he had been waiting for to travel back to Italy for the second time. Inspiration was what Harry was hoping to find in Levanto.

Soon enough, it was dark outside. Crickets could be heard and a light breeze was blowing. Harry and Y/N, after finishing their ice cream, walked back home. Harry had asked Y/N if she wanted to hang out at his place for a while before going to bed and Y/N had said yes.

"You can turn on the telly if you like." Harry said as he grabbed two glasses from the cabinet. Y/N happily did so and Leonardo Dicaprio’s face appeared on the screen.

Harry’s face lit up as he handed a glass of water to Y/N and he plopped himself down on the couch next to Y/N. "D’you mind if we watch Titanic ? I mean, I’ve already seen it countless times before and you probably have too, but I really wanna rewatch it now."

"You know what, I’ve never seen Titanic."

"Seriously ? Well then that’s just another reason why we should watch it. Unless you don’t want to, of course."

"I want to." Y/N confirmed and Harry smiled. Since the movie had already started, Harry summarized what had happened up until this point. It was endearing, seeing how excited Harry was.

They stared at each other and Y/N did not miss the way Harry’s gaze flicked to her lips for a brief moment. She had noticed him doing that earlier on and she could not deny that she wondered what his lips would feel like against hers.

Harry leaned towards her. Y/N’s breath hitched in her throat and her lips instinctively parted slightly. Harry seemed pleased with her reaction. His gaze once again fell to her lips except this time, he didn’t bother looking up.

"May I kiss you ?"

"Please do."

As soon as she gave him her consent, Harry cupped her face in both of his hands and kissed her delicately. Gentle touches became needier. Open mouth kisses were shared and one of Harry’s hands slipped in his Y/N’s hair as hers gripped his shirt.

"Bedroom ?" Harry asked, breathless.

"Yes please." Y/N giggled and hid her face in Harry’s neck when he picked her up.

Harry shut the bedroom door with his foot and, at the end of the night, Y/N still hadn’t seen Titanic.

****

A ray of sunshine coming through the blind woke Y/N up. A few seconds were needed for her to remember where she was. Instinctively, she wanted to check what time it was but was only met with the frustating fact that no clock was in the bedroom. And her phone was in her purse, which had been left on the couch last night.

Last night. Last night when she and Harry had kissed. Last night when she and Harry had done unspeakable things to each other whilst he whispered sinful words in her ear. Last night when Harry kissed her temple after what had been the best sex she’s ever had.

Y/N sighed. She had had one night stands before. She knew how it worked. Her only solace was that her walk of shame would be short. She dreaded the moment Harry would ask her to leave. She knew it was coming, he probably let her stay the night out of politeness. Y/N didn’t want things to be awkward between them not only because Harry was a great man but also because they were bound to come across each other.

Finally finding the will to get up, Y/N grabbed her dress that was discarded on the floor beside the bed and put it back on. She noticed that Harry’s clothes were still laying on the floor.

When Y/N left the bedroom, Harry was standing behind the kitchen counter. His Calvin Klein briefs were the only piece of clothing covering his body. His hair was dishevelled, curls falling on his forehead due to his head being lowered. He cut pieces of strawberries, bananas and blueberries had been put into two bowls that were in front of Harry.

Y/N tilted her head to the side. "Good morning."

Harry looked up and grinned, his bunny teeth showing. "Good morning, love."

The nickname did not go unnoticed by Y/N who she tried her best to hide how much it flustered her.

"What are you doing ?"

"Preparing breakfast. I hope you like fruits, you’ll need vitamins after such a…busy night." Harry replied, a smug smile dancing on his lips as he side-eyed Y/N to see her reaction to his teasing, making Y/N scoff. Her cheeks burned, she fidgeted with her fingers and, judging on how hard Harry tried to stifle a laugh, he noticed.

Finished preparing the fruit salad, he brought the bowls to the table. Seeing that Y/N was still standing awkwardly as if waiting for something, Harry pulled out a chair and told Y/N she could sit down. She obliged and watched him go back to the kitchen. Harry came back with a bottle of apple juice and some toasts.

"Apple juice ?" Harry offered and Y/N nodded before murmuring a thank you.

Harry seemed so unfazed by the situation that a part of Y/N felt childish for overthinking everything. After all, just because they slept together did not mean they could not be friends anymore. Y/N enjoyed Harry’s company and it has to be reciprocated otherwise Harry would not have let her stay for breakfast. Or is he just polite and plans on avoiding her as soon as she steps out of the flat ?

Finally working up the courage to speak her mind, Y/N cleared her throat, making Harry look up from his food. "Can we still be friends ?"

"What do you mean ?"

"Well, you know, now that we slept together, I don’t want things to be awkward between us."

"I don’t want us to stop hanging out just because of that. Besides, I, you know, I wouldn’t mind if we did it again. If you wanted to of course." Harry said as he scratched the back of his neck nervously.

Now that was unexpected. Y/N felt warmth spread in her tummy and she rolled her lips in her mouth to hold back a smile. "I wouldn’t mind either."

They continued to eat, looking up at each other every now and then to share knowing smiles.

****

"Should we just search romantic comedies on Netflix and then see what we find ?" Asked Harry, looking at Y/N with big pleading eyes.

It had been a couple of weeks since Harry and Y/N had had their first night together. Having dinner in a restaurant and then head home to watch a movie once or twice a week had naturally became a routine although they would end up naked more often than not.

"You always say that." Y/N trailed, the ghost of a smile forming on her lips.

Harry pouted. "You know I’m a sucker for romance. "

"I know."

****

Hours later, Y/N woke up in an empty bed. Harry’s side of the bed was already cold meaning he must have gotten up a while ago. His phone was still beside the bed. Y/N turned it on to check what time it was. Half past seven in the morning. What could Harry possibly be doing up so early ?

Y/N left the comforting warmth of the bed and found Harry sitting on the couch. A notebook and a pen in hand, he was writing frenetically. The curls that fell on his forehead did not seem to bother him one bit.

Hey. Harry’s head shot up and he turned towards where the voice came from. His eyes softened and his soulders relaxed when he caught sight of Y/N.

"Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you."

" ‘s alright." Harry smiled softly.

He patted the space next to him, signaling her to come sit with him, to which Y/N happily obliged.

"What are you doing ?"

"Writing songs."

"So early in the morning ? You must have been very inspired…" Y/N trailed as Harry left his pen in the notebook, at the page he was writing on, to act as a bookmark and put it down on his lap. He cloaked an arm around her shoulder and Y/N rested her head against Harry’s collarbone. She ran her fingers lightly along his bare thigh.

Harry had confided in her regarding his recent difficulties to write so Y/N was glad he had managed to get past his struggle.

"Mm I found the perfect muse."

Y/N looked up at him, biting the inside of her cheek to hold back a smile. "Did you now ?"

Harry nodded.

"Tell me about them."

"Well you know her very well so…" He started but was unable to stifle a laugh, Y/N soon following.

"Could you-could you show them to me ?" Y/N quizzed timidly when their laughter had died down. "You don’t have to of course."

"Maybe later. ‘M not sure they’ll all make it to the album to be honest."

Y/N frowned. "Why not ?"

"I think I’d like to keep them to myself. For now at least."

Y/N hummed at Harry’s admission. "What about the album then ?"

"Don’t you worry ‘bout that. Do you have anything planned for today ?"

"Not really, no. Why ?"

"I was thinking, after I finish this song, we could get breakfast and then go to Monterosso together."

"I’d love that, Harry."

****

Their trip to Monterosso had been memorable. They walked from Levanto to Monterosso in the morning. It was a popular hike and a rather easy one although the main difficulty was the heat of August. Y/N and Harry took a few pictures together, shared the picnic they had packed when they reached their destination and when their apetite was satisfied, they agreed to hop on a bus back to Levanto and spend the rest of the afternoon at the beach.

After settling for one of the rare spot that was covered by the trees’s shadows and applying some sunscreen, Harry announced he was going for a swim. Y/N only peeped a small okay.

"Aren’t you coming with me ? I promise it’ll be fun…"

Noticing her hesitation, Harry tried another approach, hoping to convince her to join him. "C’mon, ‘s my last day. I wanna make the most of my time left with you."

That made Y/N react. Her ears perked up and she felt her eyes rounding at what Harry had said.

It was indeed his last day in Italy and therefore, with her. Already. The following day, he’d be getting on a plane to go home in London while she’d still have one week left. 

Y/N took his hand and followed him in the water. The sounds of their laughs and of water splashing covered those of the singing crickets as they had fun together.

But the mere presence of Harry by her side reminded Y/N that these were the last moments they shared together. She wondered whether Harry would want to continue their relationship, if she could call it that, after today. Neither of them had ever mentionned something more than the fling they had. Would Harry even miss her ? She knew she would definetely miss him…

Y/N was determined to confront Harry about her worries after her shower back at Harry’s rented flat. She found him in the bedroom, packing his suitcase.

"Do you need a hand ?" She asked, bringing her towel to the back of her head to dry her damp neck.

"No, I’m done for tonight, I’ll pack the rest of my stuff tomorrow morning."

Y/N nodded and chose to speak her mind at that moment which caused Harry to instinctively take a step back at her bluntness.

"Y/N…I can’t commit to a serious relationship right now."

"When I get back to London, I’ll be busy and I won’t be home often."

"It would be difficult for the both of us."

 "I’m sorry I lead you on."

Y/N was glad the couch she was sitting on supported her because she felt as though the air had been taken out of her lungs. Her throat tightened and her eyes welled up with tears. Harry’s words played in her head all over again. Deep down, she had been expecting this answer but it still hurt to hear Harry say it.

After talking it out for a moment, they agreed that neither of them would be happy and satisfied with a long distance relationship, no matter how much they cared about each other.

They decided to go out for dinner at the same restaurant they had come across each other on Y/N’s first day. Harry tried to make her laugh and make the evening a little more joyful than it had started, which he was able to, although Y/N still felt this dreadful sentiment of bitterness. After dinner, they enjoyed a nice stroll on the beach. Both were silent, listening to the pleasant sound of the waves and relishing in the other’s company.

They slept in their respective flats that night.

****

Someone knocking on her front door woke Y/N up. Barely awake, she stumbled through the apartment to the door and sent a quick glance through the peephole before letting Harry in.

He was fully dressed, contrary to her who only wore a pair of shorts and a tank top, his sunglasses rested on top of his head, and his suitcase stood beside him.

They both smiled when their gaze met and Harry took her in his arms. The hug lasted for for two or three minutes —Y/N is not sure— but she closed her eyes and enjoyed every second of it.

Harry was the one to let go first, whispering that he had to go now. He kissed her forehead tenderly, his hands craddling Y/N’s cheeks, and bid her goodbye.

As he walked away, Harry stole a last glance, the smirk Y/N had seen so many times over the summer plastered on his face.

Only when Harry was out of sight did Y/N shut the door and got back to bed, even though she did not want to sleep anymore.

****

Four months later.

Today was the release of Harry’s first album. Y/N knew because that’s all everyone talked about. It was all over the internet.

They had not talked to each other since Harry had left Italy. Harry said it himself, with his music career, he would not have the time for a relationship. Especially a long distance one. And Y/N had not realized it at the time, but uni kept her very busy. Choosing to cherish happy memories of a sweet encounter over commiting to a relationship in which neither of them would be emotionally available had been the best decision, Y/N understood this now.

It was only quarter past eight in the evening but it was a Friday and the combination of a week of exams and the early sunset of December compelled Y/N to let herself fall on her bed. Freshly showered, her still wet hair tickled the back of her neck but she couldn’t care less. She didn’t have the energy to get up and dry it anyway.

Y/N grabbed her phone and headphones that were on the nightstand. She opened Spotify and searched Harry’s name. As soon as she pressed the play button, Meet me in the hallway started to play in her ears. Y/N closed her eyes, imagining that Harry was right beside her and was singing her to sleep.

She unlocked her phone and noticed that she was almost through with the album. Y/N absolutely loved it. There was no denying Harry was a talented musician, she had known that since the night she had first seen him perform in Levanto, and now so did the rest of the world.

Ever since New York reached its end and Y/N saw that the next track was called Woman. As soon as the song started, Y/N gasped in surprise. Harry was not the one saying it but Y/N recognized the question he used to playfully ask her during their movie night.

Y/N checked the lyrics to make sure she was not dreaming but she wasn’t. The song did start by "Should we just search for romantic comedies on Netflix and then see what we find ?"

Locking her phone, Y/N smiled to herself, glad to know Harry had not forgotten all about her.

[cosmickyeom]

seventeen, boyfriend headcanons ⋆ ﹕₊˚ things about dating jeon wonwoo !

a/n: boy do i love me some BOYFRIEND!WONU!!! if we're talking about a long-term, sweet boyfriend who adores and supports you until the end of time? i'm thinking of this man. word count: 0.4k genre: fluff wonwoo would take personal responsibility for keeping your hands warm in the winter. if you're out and about, he'd slip your joined hands into his coat pocket while offering his spare glove for your other hand. sometimes it isn't as deliberate. sometimes, you and wonwoo would be sitting on the couch, watching tv or otherwise, when his hand would inevitably reach out to take yours. maybe he's just looking for little ways to be a little closer to you. when your hand is cold to his touch, he'd bring your hand up towards him, pressing your fingertips to his lips and shifting to hold your palm to his warm cheek. it doesn't take long for him to realize what he's doing, but he's still left feeling a bit shy nonetheless. in his embarrassment, your hand would leave his as he opts for pulling you towards him, wanting to hide his face in your hair or shoulder to escape any teasings from you. notoriously known as the one who is the worst at sharing, wonwoo finds that his significant other is his lovely exception. like a child, he pulls his food out of harm's way when another member asks for a bite, but with you, he's more than willing to share the first bite. if he's the one to take the first bite, it's just so he can ensure the quality of the dish before making a little portion for you to try, too! seungkwan calls it favoritism, but wonwoo couldn't care less. it just makes him so happy seeing you happy. he greatly values the concept of sharing your lives together. since you cannot be together all the time, you guys keep each other updated through random photos and clips that you take throughout the day. it doesn't have to incredibly interesting or mind-blowing, but it's the effort that makes his heart sing. he loves getting photos of your view from your desk or of the tree that you saw on your way to work. am i convinced that he'd collect these photos to curate into an album to gift to you for an anniversary? YEP! in the same way, he also loves hearing you talk. allowing him to be there while you're indulging in your own musings is his favorite way to feel more connected to you. you could go off on tangents in the middle of your ramblings and sweet wonwoo would just thoughtfully hum along in vague agreement, maybe offering a question every once in a while to let you know that he's still listening. even if he doesn't initially understand a thing about the intricacies of your job or favorite hobby, he still loves being included in the conversation. he would remember random little facts that you told him weeks ago, catching you both off guard and giving you both a good laugh!

[nathaslosthershit]

[3.5] Why Birdie?

Mat Barzal x Hughes!sister

Part of the Birdie Hughes AU

Here is the link for the Masterlist 

Summary: Mat finally asks why her friends and family refer to her as Birdie

Various interviews from each of her brothers had come out and Birdie had watched them with Mat. He knew her friends and family called her Birdie. She had even told him that he could, although he usually used a sweet pet name for her, he especially liked how flustered she would get when he would use one.

“Sweets, why do they call you Birdie?” she giggled at the name.

“What, you don’t like it?” She teased.

“No, not at all, it's cute. I'm just confused as to why?”

“When I was very young, I would call every single animal I saw a ‘birdie’. All because we had a bird feeder outside my bedroom window that I really liked to watch. Then I saw squirrels eating from it, and I just had decided in my toddler mind that if it isn’t a human, it's a ‘birdie’. My parents thought it was cute till they started to get concerned.” She laughed.

Mat’s heart ached at the thought of a baby version of the girl in front of him. When he found childhood pictures of her and her brothers after he couldn’t sleep the night they met, he had started imagining so much more of his life with her. Which was crazy, they hadn’t even made anything official. Sure they acted like a couple, and definitely did things couples did, he had been nervous about saying anything. Which was so unlike him.

But maybe that was a sign that this was different from relationships in the past. If he is already so nervous about messing it up, but wants a future with her, a long one at that, he should just say something.

“Mat?” Birdie asks, sending him out of his daze. “I asked if you wanted to see baby photos? My mom sent a bunch for my birthday months ago and I finally got around to making an album.” After a very eager ‘yes’ from Mat, she went to fetch the book.

It was definitely ill-advised to start imagining your future kids with a woman you weren’t even official with yet, but here Mat was. As she went through story after story, explaining all her fondest, and most embarrassing moments, he couldn’t handle it anymore.

“Date me please” was all he said. Probably the most idiotic request to leave his mouth in his 20+ years of life.

“Excuse me?” Birdie asked, taken aback.

“Be my girlfriend, partner, significant other, whatever the fuck you want to call it. Just- I really, really like you, Birdie, and it is killing me that you aren’t mine.” He was no Jane Austen, that was for sure, but he was genuine, and so sweet, and so so hot.

How could she ever refuse?

Without saying anything back, she answered with a kiss, then another, and another, till they were all tangled in each other.

Now she definitely had to tell her brothers. 

[mysadblacksoul]

Twenty One Pilots 7 - tape theory lol

So I think we all know what happened the other days. The red tape appeared on the covers of the past albums. What is interesting is that the tape only covers the eyes. Yet in case of Blurryface it covers one circle - and since it's Twenty One Pilots we talk about it has a huge significance

So get yourself a cup of coffee and let's break down the mystery 1. The tape - significance The tape was very important element to the previous eras. In Trench it was something that was used to cover what is important, which is yourself. Remember what happened in the Nico and the niners mv? After meeting Josh Tyler was given yellow tape to keep him safe.

But it was yellow - why? Because Bishops can't see yellow. So the tape this coloured can keep you safe. How we know that? Let's look back on Ride, Tyler says he likes to "stay in the sun where he's fine". The sun is commonly drawn as yellow.

In Scaled and Icy era the tape also made an appearance. In Saturday mv, after the submarine was flooded Josh used tape to try to fix it. But it was still the same yellow tape

Now the tape become red. It is usually associated with sacrifice, danger, and courage. But as you can see it is not used by the pilots. This tape is used by the Bishops to cover people/animals eyes. To prevent them from seeing something they are not supposed to.

But is it the first time we see the red tape? Not really, it is the colour that Josh used in Guns for hands mv. And as you can see the tape also covers his eyes...

2. Tape - covering eves

How we know it's Bishops? Well, they are the one who banned music from Dema. It is possible that they don't want other's to see what Banditos were doing, the rebellion. What does the tape cover?

On Vessel, it’s on the eyes of Tyler and Josh’s grandfathers, who in the album art could’ve served as the same vessel for their spirit.

On Blurryface, it’s blocking out the first circle, made for HDS. The bishop associated with that? Keons, the one turned (told you it will be important later).

On Trench it's over the eyes of a vulture, the Bandito’s symbol.

And on SAI it covers the eyes of Trash. Why? Trash the dragon represents a vulture. Citizens of Dema literally call vultures “trash dragons”, it means that they’re covering the vulture’s eyes completely.

3. Covering eyes in lyrics

The lyric from The Outside of course - "I’ve got a long drive, I’ll tape my eyes, so I don’t fall asleep again"

But we can also see eye reference in Heavydirtysoul in "Gangsters don't cry / Therefore, therefore I'm /Mr. Misty-eyed, therefore I'm". And you might ask yourself what the hell does HDS have to do with anything. Well it has a lot to do with Keons. 4. Keons and his importance

So we already established that he is important to this theory, because he is the one who is covered on the Blurryface cover. His name is derived from a Heavydirtysoul lyric, “choKE ON Smoke”. Th

So he is a Bishop but his eyes are covered - why? Well he could be on Bandito side this whole time. Crazy, I know but hear me out.

In the music video storyline, Keons plays a pivotal role in aiding Tyler's escape from Dema and supporting the Banditos in their fight against the oppressive bishops. Keons orchestrates a diversion to allow Tyler to flee and leads a plan to crash the submarine, saving Tyler from the fake bishops' schemes. He also frames another bishop for the submarine incident, leading to their demise. Keons ultimately helps Tyler take control of a bishop vessel to destroy Dema from "the outside". Makes sense right? So it would make him a threat to the other Bishops - therefore he has to be eliminated or blinded. So that he won't interfere with their plan again.

5. Let's talk colours again I know I said that the tape is red. But is it actualy? It could be seen as deep orange and orange also plays a significance in the lore. It symbolizes being a prisoner, like in Heathens mv and Choker mv.

You might say that Heathens is not part of the lore at all. But if we talk colours then Tyler was literary wearing orange while bein opressed and then changed to yellow when he played with Josh. As if he gained the freedom to play music and where the music is prohibited? In Dema

And in Choker Tyler wore orange beanie, as a symbol of still being controled

So I believe that IF the tape is orange it could be a colour of opression. Which would makes sense for Bishops to use it. But overall it also stands for determination and strength. It is sure something that Banditos will need for the final battle lol

And in the rap part in Choker you have "You get taller, bolder, stronger and the rearview only blinds you".

The rearview has a symbolism itself. Meaning, if we knew in the past what we know now, we could have acted on that insight.

And fun thing. The drumset in Saturday was also orange

6. Let's circle back to what we know so far

Well, that the album is comming, which is exciting. That it would be full of lore and that we would see more of the Bishops who are out for blood and revenge

So... I will keep you updated when something new drops!

[dropthedemiurge]

Love for Love's Sake | Things You Didn't Notice #9

(okay it's not an episode number this time i just still have many details to point out oops pls let me go)

I swear. I thought I'd stop mentioning small details because I already wrote like 10 posts on Tumblr translating and explaining all the cultural stuff regarding this show and the obsession is already becoming embarrassing, but I rewatched the last episodes again and I've got tiny. Little. Details. That I can't help but point people to once again. Because damn, the amount of thought put into this show!

(trigger warning: first part talks about suicide and depression, next ones are linguistic and cultural)

The Black Suit & The Sea

I would've asked Koreans I know about the significance of such symbolism but they are celebrating Seollal (New Year) today and I don't wanna ruin the festive mood asking about "how would people dress for suicide" x)

But after watching this scene, I recognized some strong parallels in Korean media depicting depression, suicide and one's decision to end their life. One of it is bridges and jumping (if you don't know what Bridge of Life is, ask me and I'll share, so this post wouldn't become too long) but another one is sea.

My interpretation - Koreans wear black suits to funerals, so if someone is headed to the sea in a black suit, it might mean this is the character's attempt to "have" their own funeral before finally ending their life. Why do I think this combination is somehow significant?

Because I remembered a music video one of K-pop artists I like (Kim Hanbin) made, after he experienced the downfall of career, extreme hate and rejection from the public, and severe depression. His whole album Waterfall tells Hanbin's personal story, dark thoughts and his battle to survive during the time when he was gone for 2 years, but in the music video for this album (illa illa) he is seen emerging from the sea in a black suit – metaphorically regaining his music and, most importantly, desire to live. Watch with lyrics!

If we think, this is how you depict suicidal thoughts/attempt in Korean media (of course, Love for Love's Sake was even more blunt in telling us the meaning), then Myungha wearing black suit wasn't just for the pretty or dramatic picture. More than that, we see him wearing the black suit for the whole last evening – especially when he goes to finally meet his mother.

Which tells us Myungha has already decided to disappear from this world, and was determined to do it on that day, and his mother rejecting him and pretending she doesn't know her son might not have been just the last straw... but it definitely could've been Myungha's last attempt to find anything in his life worth staying for, worth not going through with his plan.

Anyway, what a scary but beautiful symbolism.

Let's talk about something happier! More heartwarming!

Do you remember when we talked about the carefully placed movie posters in previous episodes? I payed more attention to the background this time when in Episode 8 Yeowoon ran to the cinema searching for Myungha in his world. And what an amazing discovery! When Myungha starts existing again and calls Yeowoon, the movie poster behind Yeowoon says "Guardian" (보호자).

And I already said in another post that Myungha in previous episodes admitted himself being Yeowoon's "guardian, protector" in the exact same word. But now this word is shown next to Yeowoon! As Yeowoon is the one who changed the main mission and has now declared himself Myungha's guardian and protector and will do his best to make him (his favourite pereson/bias/blorbo) happy. They have now both become guardians for each other. This. Goddamn. Show.

And I also want to shout out the VFX & Production team for this show – all the visual effects are very down to earth, gentle and not over the top but enhancing the series to the max. Like, maybe you wondered where on the screen does it say "Monday, August 14" and "Saturday, August 12"? Well, as expected, you see it on four monitor screens above the box office – the date, the ongoing movies (yep, still our favourite two fake movies) and available dates etc.

But when Yeowoon and Myungha agree to meet each other in the exact system time, they are facing each other without a barrier, and the screens are now counting down the time until the Game End. Instead of normally showing movies, like in the previous shot, it says "Time remaining: 3 hours, 23 minutes, 15 seconds". It was either done with VFX or practically, but still, the thought of incorporating system messages into the actual background is insane and I'm always happy to discover such details.

I don't know how many of you have motivational stairs at your schools, we definitely didn't have this but it's quite a popular thing in Korea. They put popular and uplifting sayings for students on each stair, sometimes they even quote motivational phrases from idols, like this:

And it's interesting that when system gets broken and Myungha is about to disappear, we see the deep cracks coming through the stairs, we see ruined school BUT at the same time the quotes in the show are so obviously in our focus. And they are already written (see screenshots above) in Korean and English, but I'll still write down: one is saying "Stay hungry, stay foolish" and "If you dream it, you can do it, you will succeed". So, perhaps... motivational quotes from sunbae?

And the last moment isn't heavy on translation but I still want to talk about it because cool Korean culture!xD You see the gang grilling meat on the roof (it's called samgyeopsal and it's very popular to have for gatherings), and then Myungha makes a "ssam" and feeds it to Yeowoon – but Sangwon steals it.

Ssam is a wrap, you grill meat then put it on the salad leaf, add other ingredients (like mushrooms, sauces, garlic, green onions etc, there are many side dishes) and then you wrap it in this sort of salad sack and eat it. It's very tasty and unusual combination. But the thing is! There is no way to make it for someone else and leave it on their plate so if you make a ssam wrap for someone and want to give it to a person, you literally have to feed them (like Myungha does with a very fond smile). This is why it's often seen as a romantic gesture (aka feeding someone from your fork etc) and why it's hilarious that Sangwon steals this ssam from Yeowoon (because he wants and he gets Myungha's affection and he's not above being a brat about it!)

I'm sure you can already sense it anyway without me telling you about romantic/close-friend implications, but I thought you guys might wonder why are the guys fighting over the salad leaf.

Another funny thing – Sangwon mentions "There's a saying, 'Don't scold dogs while they eat'". This is a Korean proverb "밥 먹을 때는 개도 안 때린다" ("You don't hit even a dog when it eats") which means that, no matter how annoying you find someone, no matter how angry you are, you can't scold this person while they are eating. Eating is a very important cultural thing in Asia, of course, so do not have arguments at the dinner :D But it's funny how Sangwon uses old proverbs to be mischievous and steal Myungha's love without consequences xD I adore him

I swear, this gotta be my last post about all the details in Love for Love's Sake. There is one more scene with the mirror and a caption, and I'm very curious if it means something because it was seen twice, during system breaking down scene as well, but it's either in Chinese or Japanese and I can't read it.

Anyway! Hope you enjoyed your everyday magazine, I love reading all your tags and thoughts and comments, and if you want to read all my previous translations and pointed out cultural details in Love for Love's Sake, go read this tag!=)

[nhl-stories]

midnight love – Anthony Beauvillier

Summary: Hannah was ready to accept her fate as second choice, but a newcomer just entered the picture

Author’s Note: Oh my god I've been working through this for so long and then bam that trade happens. And changed how I was going to end this so I'm a bit distraught.

Word Count: 3.9k

Album Series Masterlist

I can't be your midnight love When your silver is my gold

She wishes she had enough of a backbone to disappoint people, if only in self-preservation. But no, instead Hannah is spending another night as a stand in.

It’s not like these people aren’t her friends, but there’s a hierarchy; they’re Brock’s friends and teammates first, then Cora’s friends and fellow significant others, then at the bottom of the list is Hannah.

At least it’s just a team dinner, not some event where she has to explain over and over again that no, she is not Brock’s girlfriend, just a friend. Usually throw in a joke about taking advantage of an open bar or nice dinner.

His real girlfriend is prettier and more talented, just busy with her emergency medicine residency. Hannah is just a placeholder so he doesn’t have to go somewhere alone.

Don’t worry, Brock isn’t slumming it with the plain-looking girl who works in a fish market.

He’s with Cora: head cheerleader and prom queen in high school, first in her class in college and med school, Miss British Columbia who probably would have been Miss Canada if she wasn’t too busy studying to be a fucking doctor.

Hannah’s only a little bitter.

To be fair, she did it to herself. She spent her whole life as Cora’s less-than-impressive sidekick, she should have seen it coming.

Hannah should have thought twice before introducing Cora to Brock, should have known Cora would charm him and ask him out before Hannah could even tell her how she felt about him. And then it was a year and a half of worming her way into Brock’s heart down the drain.

Brock and Cora are good match. They look like a Barbie and Ken set and then they’re personable and kind on top of it.

Still, Brock can’t seem to take Hannah off a pedestal. It’s a little lower than Cora’s, but a pedestal nonetheless. Maybe if she jumps off, it will put her out of her misery.

“You’re Brock’s girlfriend? The doctor?”

Hannah’s head snaps up from stabbing the cherry in her drink, to see a new face. Anthony Beauvillier, her brain supplies.

“Oh no, just a friend filling in,” she bites back her initial reaction of a barking laugh, “You’re Anthony, welcome to Vancouver.”

“Thanks, so just a friend, what’s your name?”

“Oh, right, Hannah.”

“Hannah since you’re here and not a significant other, I can assume you know all the dirt.”

Hannah blushes under his gaze. His eyes are so blue she can’t seem to keep direct eye contact. So, they keep drifting to his hair, she hadn’t realized he had such soft looking locks since she mostly had seen him on TV with a helmet.

“I guess, what do you want to know?”

She tries to be coy; she definitely knows more than most. She’s so present but so unassuming she guesses she must be easy to open up to.

“Is it really a big deal that Petey brought around a girl?”

“There hasn’t been a lot of exciting off-ice news this season. But I’ve known him for almost 4 years and I’ve barely seen him flirt with a girl, so to bring a girlfriend is kind of big deal. Although between you and me I think he’s been hung up on her for a while.”

Anthony nods.

“The only thing before this was Quinn broke up with his girlfriend from back home and then just started showing up with a new girlfriend like a month later. But Samantha has been accepted into the fold so it’s not really gossip anymore.”

“You really do know the low down.”

“I can’t give you much on-ice info, but off-ice dynamics, I’m your woman.”

He gives her a crooked smile and starts to say something, when a hand grabs her elbow a bit too tight.

“Dinner is starting, I got us seats,” Brock tugs her towards the table that’s filling up.

“Nice talking to you Anthony,” she gently pulls her arm out of Brocks grip.

“Yeah, let’s do it again sometime.”

∫∫∫

“You smell like fish,” Cora says as Hannah sits down next her in the stands.

She pulls up her collar and gives it a sniff, she doesn’t smell anything, “I changed before I came here.”

“I think it’s just embedded itself into your skin at this point.”

“You smelled like a barn when we met and I still became your friend, even though everyone said you smelled like horse butt.”

“Well, the tables have turned and now you’re the stinky friend.”

“Fuck off,” Hannah laughs and flips her friend off.

Cora reaches in her purse for a tiny spray bottle of perfume, “I got you covered my fishy friend,” she gives her a spritz.

“Did I miss anything interesting?”

“I just got here, like 10 minutes before you. Had a last-minute surgery.”

“So, we were both working with guts before we came.”

“Yeah, and hopefully after this, number six will be rearranging my guts.”

Hannah laughs, but it’s hollow. They’ve been together long enough it shouldn’t still sting, but somehow it does.

Thankfully, there’s a big hit on the ice to shift their focus.

“The new guy is pretty cute,” Cora says when play settles.

“Anthony?”

“Yeah, you met him at that dinner thing, right?”

The tone in Cora’s voice makes it clear that she knows something Hannah doesn’t. That she’s toying with her food.

“Mm-hmm, he seems nice.”

“Brock said he was flirting with you. He was all worked up about it too, like ‘this new guy comes in and just charms the first girl he sees, what if Hannah was my girlfriend?’”

Hannah forces herself to focus on the puck traveling down the ice. She can’t look at Cora, let her see something she might jump on

The puck is blown dead, icing, and Hannah tries to keep her face blank when she turns, “He was just trying to meet the group and be friendly.”

“That’s what I tried to tell him. Why would he be trying to flirt with you?”

Hannah bites her tongue, she knows Cora means why would he be flirting with someone at a team dinner, when most women there would be taken. It doesn’t mean it’s any less hurtful. Like Cora isn’t digging her finger into the soft flesh of her biggest insecurities. 

“Brock’s just protective of what’s his,” Cora adds like that’s not another sharp jab.

A wave of nausea rolls over Hannah.

The boys win by one in a mostly winless season, which is good reason to go out and celebrate. Hannah is wrangled into one of Cora’s dresses, and doused in her perfume, and dragged to a club.

One out of three of those things is Hannah’s choice.

“You smell nice,” Brock leans over to whisper in her ear, reaching across her body to steal a gulp from her drink.

Her body involuntarily flushes, like it always does when Brock casually invades her space. So completely unaware of the effect he has on her.

“I smell like your girlfriend,” she hates the way her voice wavers.

“Where is she anyway?” He stares out into the crowd, arm casually thrown over Hannah’s shoulder.

“Dancing with some of the girlfriends,” she waves in the direction the group went.

“Not like you to not join in,” he gives her a smile that used to be reserved for her only.

“It’s been a long day,” she shrugs, “which reminds me, Cora said certain things that mean if I want a good night’s sleep, bring her back to your place.”

“So, I’m scoring off the ice too?”

Hannah gags, “second star on and off the ice.”

Brock laughs and gives her gentle shove.

“I’m gonna get a drink, need a refill?”

Hannah gives him a thumbs up.

She watches him walk towards the bar and Cora appear out of thin air to wrap herself around him. Hannah knows she’ll be waiting on that drink forever.

“Looked like you could use a refill,” a solid wall of warmth slides up next to her, a drink placed in front of her.

She should have been expecting it to be Anthony, but she’s surprised. A warm feeling rolling over her thinking about how Brock thought he was flirting.

“Thanks, Brock’s useless,” she holds up the glass in cheers and takes a sip.

Over the rim of the glass, she catches two blondes sucking face, having their foreplay in front of everyone.

“Do you want to get out of here?” She blurts without thinking of the implication, maybe not caring.

Anthony gapes at her forwardness before Hannah’s brain catches up, “Like to a quieter bar?”

“Sure.”

Hannah takes him to a dive bar, where they drink crappy beer in tall boys and play darts. She’s too dressed up for the location but it doesn’t matter, they only have eyes for each other.

“You worked on a crabbing boat?” Anthony asks incredulously.

The alcohol is already having her run hot, but the focus from Anthony- or Tito or Beau as he said people call him- feels like a direct sunray. She’s the listener not the talker. Yet, there’s something disarming about Anthony, makes her walls fall away, makes her want to talk as much as she listens.

“Yeah, it was a quick way to make a lot of money in a few months, and it was exciting. There aren’t a lot of crabs the past few years so I haven’t had a chance to go back. And I’m not very smart so I have limited options.”

“You’re talking to a hockey player, I’m also not very smart and have limited options.”

“That’s probably explains why Brock and I became such good friends, although he did go to some college,” she grins and throws her last dart.

Anthony doesn’t make a move to start his turn, “so you and Brock were never–“ he cuts himself off with a throw.

“More than friends?” Hannah supplies.

“Yeah,” Anthony visibly tinges pink even in the darkened bar.

Hannah can’t quite vocalize her answer, worried the timbre of her voice will give away all the thoughts and feelings she’s been hiding. She shakes her head instead.

“If Brock was being weird, I think he was just vetting you. As a teammate and if you were worth my affections or something. Not that you were actually flirting with me.”

“I was,” Anthony looks her straight on, no doubt on his face or in his voice.

Something snaps inside Hannah, bursting red-hot in her veins. She’s not going to sit back and wait this time; she’s going to lean into what she’s feeling and grab it tight.

She drags Anthony towards to the back of the bar, pushing him into the bathroom and pushing him against the door once inside. She feels a little depraved, but she drives through the feeling and kisses Anthony.

He’s quick to kiss back, tongue slipping past her lips, gentling her erratic movements. He grabs her hips gently, but firm. He’s a wave of cold water crashing into her molten lava body. Nature in symbiosis.

“I don’t normally do this,” she says between kisses.

He moves his hands up to her waist, he doesn’t stop kissing her, just moves down her jaw closer to her ear, “and this is what you want?”

He sinks in his teeth into the hinge of her jaw, she gasps.

“I want–“ her voice is shaky.

She doesn’t know how to say it or ask for it. She just wants the light of his attention, on her, his whole-hearted focus directed at only her, like no one else exists.

“Cause I want more than a bathroom hookup, but I’ll take what I can get,” she can feel his smile against her skin.

There’s a bang on the door then someone yells, “You don’t have to go, but you can’t stay here!”

It’s like being dunked in the ice-cold Pacific.

She gives him one more peck, “Another time?”

∫∫∫

They find themselves in another bathroom, this time in Demko’s house while the team has a party. Hannah on the counter and Anthony in a vice grip between her knees.

“Sorry, couldn’t wait until after the party.”

Hannah can’t hold back her smile. Hasn’t been for almost two weeks now. They hadn’t seen each other again, but had been texting. If Cora asks, she says it’s Brock being stupid. If Brock asks, she says it’s Cora being dramatic.

“I like it,” digging her fingers into his hair, it’s as soft as it looks.

 “But we can’t take too long,” she adds, though she doesn’t kiss like someone with an exit plan.

“I’ll take my time tonight,” he whispers against her lips.

Voices drift closer to the door when they finally decide to peel apart. Hannah fixes where she mussed his hair as best she can, before peeking to see if the coast is clear.

She makes her way through the kitchen to casually grab a drink and slides up next to Cora and her conversation with the other better halves.

She’s trying to ease herself into the conversation but her mind is elsewhere. In the future and whatever tonight is going to be and in the present glancing over to see Anthony trying to do the same.

Cora elbows her before leaning in, “Classic hot mess Hannah.”

“What?”

“Your very dumb, signature move,” Cora grins, “you forgot to wipe your lipstick off his mouth before you reintegrated back into society.”

Hannah tries to casually glance back at Anthony, he looks towards her at the same time and grins. His lips a shade too pink to be natural. Hannah mimes wiping her lips with the back of her hand, hoping he’ll get the message.

“You dirty girl, I’d recognize that nude berry on any boy’s lips, which honestly let me find you a new color, you’ve been using that for like a decade now.”

Hannah tries to smile through her worry, but Cora knows her well enough to see through it.

“I’m very proud of you for getting him while the getting’s hot, but if you’re worried about me telling Brocky babe or something, don’t worry, secret’s safe with me,” she zips her lips and throws the key over her shoulder.

The giddy nerves in her stomach start fighting the anxious nerves in her stomach.

A heavy arm drapes over Hannah’s shoulder, “There you are, Cora said she saw you but I couldn’t find you anywhere.”

That’s the thing, Hannah trusts Cora to keep a secret, she doesn’t quite trust herself.

“Almost feels like you’ve been hiding from me,” Brock laughs at the thought.

Cora joins in and gives Hannah a desperate look to join in as well, Hannah can feel her own laugh is too erratic, but Brock doesn’t seem phased.

“Babe, she’s allowed to have her own life, she’s not just our personal third wheel,” Cora pulls him into her own side.

“Technically Cora, you’re the third wheel to our friendship,” he grins and gives her a peck.

Hannah feels nauseous.

“Oh honey, you’re the third wheel to Hannah and I’s friendship, it’s been around the longest.”

They’re not even acting like Hannah is involved in this conversation, she takes the opportunity to duck out. She grabs another a drink and goes out to the unused balcony. It’s still too cold to hang out there at night, the air is the kind of wet-cold that you can feel in every breath.

“How long have you been in love with Brock?”

Hannah jumps at his voice, barely managing to keep a hold on her bottle of beer.

“I’m not really in love with him anymore,” there’s no use in lying if she’s that transparent.

“Is that why this all secretive?”

Anthony’s eyes are so big, endless blue that Hannah isn’t sure how to read. She wants to learn.

She has reasons lined up: she doesn’t want to effect team chemistry, doesn’t want to ruin her friendships if this goes south, doesn’t want to fall in love with another hockey player.

But all those reasons are logical and rational. And this is emotional in a way she’s not sure she can find room for in her body.

“It’s nice to have something that’s just mine,” she furrows her brow, feels like it’s not quite what she means.

“I’m not the smartest or the prettiest or the most anything, I’m just Hannah. But you act like that’s enough. I’m not just a consolation prize or silver you’re settling for because you can’t have gold.”

Anthony doesn’t say anything for a long time, Hannah feels like maybe they froze outside.

Then he takes a step forward, cupping her face with hands so warm they burn her cheeks. He kisses her slowly; Hannah doesn’t think anyone has ever kissed her like this. Like she’s something precious, worth savoring.

He pulls away and smirks, “I’ve kind of been wishing for silver my whole life.”

“Jesus Christ, is that a Stanley Cup joke?” her smile grows so big it swallows her face.

“Like I’ve said I’m not that smart or that clever either.”

Hannah just has to kiss that stupid smile off his face, not caring who can see them through the windows.

∫∫∫

Brock is pissed.

He acts like everyone doesn’t know what it’s about. Like they don’t notice the glares he sends Beau when he walks into the locker room or how his knuckles go white around a beer bottle when he sees Hannah dance with Anthony at club.

They all let him sulk for a week, without saying anything.

Teammates start to chirp him when it lasts longer.

It comes to a head when Brock goes to a team event alone and brings his mood home to Cora.

“You’re not even his ex or something,” Cora is pretending to be the slowest customer of all time at the fish counter while she complains.

Hannah sort of wishes it was a rush so she could usher her friend away, she’s so over dealing with Brock. The jealousy that she would have killed for a few months ago is starting to become overkill and Hannah kind find it in her to be bothered.

It’s funny that the first time she’s all Brock can think about, is also the first time she doesn’t give a shit about it.

“He’s never had to share you with someone else and now I’m like invisible or something.”

That make Hannah pause.

In all the years she’s known Cora she’s the never been self-conscious, never had a reason to be.

She has to bite back the spiteful smile, it’s nice to be reminded that Cora is a mere mortal too.

“I’ll talk to him, can’t have you feeling lesser than me.”

Cora scoffs, “Hey, don’t talk about my best friend like that.”

Hannah rolls her eyes.

“I’m serious bitch, I don’t know why it took so long for it to get through your head, but I’m glad someone finally makes you feel on top of the world.”

The next night Hannah and Anthony are at Brock’s door.

He opens the door and almost shuts it in their face, but Hannah catches the door with her foot and shoves Anthony through the door.

“It’s an ambush babe,” Cora squeezes Brock shoulders, trying to make him unclench an iota.

“I come bearing the traditional British Columbian peace offering, a fillet of fish,” she nobly holds out the wrapped package in her arms.

Brock almost cracks smile.

“Brocky babe, why don’t you help her prep the fish and I will fix Beau here a drink.”

Hannah drags him into the kitchen before he can argue or pout.

She doesn’t really need prep; she knows her way around the kitchen already and the recipe like the back of her hand.

She pulls out a knife and points it at Brock.

“I’ll let you be upset for the time it takes me to cook this fish, and then you’re going to snap out of it.”

She gets to work, “You love Cora, you love that she loves hiking and boating and your dogs. You love that she’s as passionate about her job as you are. You love that she moved the fucking earth to make your dad passing as easy as possible for you.”

Brock’s face is set in stone.

“So why the fuck are you so bent out of shape about me dating someone, to the point where your perfect girlfriend is jealous of me?”

“Of all the people in the world you had to go for one of my teammates? What if something happens and I can’t even think of passing to him or it makes things weird with my teammates.” Brock snaps.

“Cause you’re doing a great job of that right now, Petey says he’s worried you’ll throw a punch soon.”

“Were you just using me until you could land the right hockey player?”

“Not everything I do is about you Brock. Sorry I let you think that for so long.”

She throws some of the fish in the hot pan, it sizzles like her nerves.

“I’m sorry it happened this way, it’s the last thing I would purposely try to do. But can’t you tell how happy he makes me?”

She feels her tears start to fall, hot and heavy. They’ve been locked and loaded for years.

“You didn’t want me when we met all those years ago, and that hurt. And then you fell for my best friend like instantly, and that hurt worse.  You don’t want me that way, so you don’t get to be mad that someone else does.”

Brock looks like he might cry, too.

“I love being your best friend. I love your dumb jokes and you’re stupid fucking laugh. But I can find that somewhere else if you can’t accept this.”

Brock squeezes her tight, she can feel his tears on the crown of her head.

“I want what’s best for you,” he pulls away, “sorry I have a dumb way of showing it, is there any way I can make it up to you?”

“Pay my rent when you ask Cora to move in?”

Brock lets out one of his stupid fucking laughs, “maybe by next season you’ll also have a new place to live.”

Hannah shoves him away and plates the last of the fish, “the instant acceptance is appreciated, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

She goes to the dining room where the others are waiting with bated breath, pretending like they weren’t eavesdroping on the whole conversation.

“Hope you guys are ready for some tear-brined salmon for this very emotional and awkward double date.”

Anthony takes her hand when she sits down, she can’t help but kiss him. She likes the view off her pedestal.

[tgmsunmontue]

Jake's Cakes

Hangster AU MeetCute. 2k. (Teen for swearing but more General). Complete. Iceman has tasked Bradley with organising Maverick's 60th birthday cake. This goes as planned until Mav decides to be a gremlin.

                He’s filled in an online form and gotten confirmation that they can make a cake for his time frame, and he’s not sure when ordering some baked goods required such a procedure. He’s pretty sure his mom always just bought his cakes from the grocery store. But it’s Mav’s sixtieth, his first significant birthday since they started patching their broken relationship a few years ago. Ice has asked him to organize a cake, enough for a hundred people, and okay, that seems extravagant but Ice is the one planning the party and he feels like he’s in his bad books, so he’ll do as Ice asks.

                There’s a bell attached to the door and it jingles as he pushes it open and he looks around the store called Jake’s Cakes. It’s crisp and clean, sparkling glass display cabinet showing a selection of carefully decorated cupcakes, some cookies and slices, all looking delicious, which is what the reviews had said, and he hopes like hell they were real ones. He doesn’t want to screw this up.

                “Hi, can I help you?”

                “Hi, I have an appointment?”

                “Bradley?”

                “Yeah, that’s me.”

                “Great. I’ll let Jake know you’re here. He won’t be very far away. We have an album if you’d like to look at pictures and get some ideas.”

                He expects an actual physical album, but instead it’s a tablet and he can flip through the pictures with a swipe of his finger and he feels more confident with his choice of bakery. There’re lots of photos and also photos and even short video of the cakes in-progress, and it’s pretty damned cool seeing the time and skill that goes into making and decorating, but also knowing that he’s chosen a place that takes care to show that to the customers as well.

                Then a guy is walking toward him, wearing chef whites that have a colorful trim, maybe a cupcake pattern? He’s taller, younger than Bradley expected, also a lot more male than he was expecting, which he realizes is incredibly sexist of him. He’s grinning, pulling off disposable gloves and holding his hand out to shake and Bradley takes it.

                “Hi. Bradley Bradshaw?”

                “Yeah, that’s me.”

                “Hi. I’m Jake. So, how can I help you?”

                “Uh, hi, I need to order a cake for a birthday party?”

                “Yeah, of course. It’s generally why most people make appointments with me. You have an idea on flavor and how many people you’re wanting to feed?”

                “Yeah, about one hundred people, and his favorite flavor is vanilla.”

                “Boyfriend?”

                Bradley pulls a face.

                “No. Godfather. It’s his 60th. But you can’t refer to his age on the cake, he’ll kill me and they won’t find my body.”

                The guy lets his eyes sweep down the length of Bradley’s body and then back up and he feels himself flush. He’s not used to guys checking him out so blatantly. The Navy might have moved a little with the times, but that is not something he’s ever encountered outside of a nightclub.

                “That would be a shame.”

                “Uh.”

                “Back to the cake… What were you thinking in terms of decorations and frosting? Any hard no’s or flavor profiles?”

                “He likes lemon. He’s pretty boring when it comes to cake flavors actually,” Bradley realizes, and it actually makes a nice change to have something that is just simple when it comes to Mav. Not the complicated mess that has been their relationship in the past.

                “We can afford to have a few flavors if we’re feeding one hundred. Maybe a classic chocolate mudcake for those that don’t like vanilla?”

                “Yeah, sure. You’re the expert.”

                “So, what’s he into? Do we have a theme for the party or something I can use to guide me for decorating?”

                “Uh, there isn’t a theme I don’t think. Let me check. He’s a naval aviator.”

                “Does it run in the family?”

                “What?”

                “Being a naval aviator?”

                Bradley shrugs.

                “Yeah, I guess it does.”

                “Okay, so long serving naval aviator and obviously proud of it. Does he have a call sign?”

                “Yeah. Maverick.”

                “Okay. that’s a cool callsign, I was hoping for something a bit goofy, like Possum or something.”

                “Sorry to disappoint?”

                “Oh, there is nothing disappointing about you…”

                Bradley flushes again, not sure how to flirt back in the face of such brazen interest. He’s used to far more subtle approaches, but he doesn’t want to make the guy think he’s not interested.

                “He fixes up motorbikes, and planes. His favorites are a P51 Mustang plane and a Kawasaki-Ninja bike… he loves flying. A lot. More than anything else probably.”

                “Is it the sky or the speed?”

                “Uh, the speed probably. He’s a bit of a daredevil.”

                “Okay. I’ve got some ideas. You want me to sketch them up and send them to you, or do you trust me?”

                “Just tell me what you’re thinking…” Jake just raises an eyebrow at him, and Jesus fuck, does the man never stop flirting? “About the cake?”

                Jake grins, his eyes crinkling like he knows he’s flustering him and he’s taking a lot of pleasure in it.

                “Three tier on a large board, using fondant because then I can paint it. One half of the board is a road in the desert, with the bike, the other half of the board an ocean with a carrier and then the cake itself painted like the sky but have a whole bunch of silhouettes of planes and then a model of the P51 at the top. That’s what I’m thinking. For the cake.”

                “Sounds good,” Bradley manages to croak out.

…            …            …

                After paying the deposit and organizing pickup for a couple of weeks’ time he somehow leaves without a date, or even the guys number; he’s never felt so mentally undressed while remaining fully clothed. Maybe it was just flirting and he’s that out of practice.

…            …            …

                Pete looks at the cake and it’s gorgeous, clearly made with him in mind and he’s glad he’s managed to see it without an audience, because he feels a little emotional looking at it. He definitely wants to try it, even though it’s one of those pieces of almost art which some people feel bad about cutting up. He doesn’t, cake is made to be eaten. He pulls out his phone and snaps a few pictures, then decides a video is necessary to capture the proper amount of details, the little white tips on the waves as the carrier breaks through the water, the planes in the sky, and he can identify the different types and he’s really impressed.

                It is making him quite hungry though, but he can’t cut a slice, Tom and Bradley would both kill him and be each other’s alibi… He spies a little box, sealed with the sticker of what must be the bakery and his eyes light up, opening it easily. He’d expected maybe a slice of cake, instead there’s three cookies… They’re heart shaped, like the conversation heart candy you get around Valentine’s Day. Except he knows Tom had asked Bradley to organize the cake.

                Call me.

                Hot stuff.

                And there, finally, on the last cookie is a phone number and Pete laughs, because clearly Bradley made an impression himself. He quickly snaps a picture of all of them and sends them to Tom along with the message ‘why do you not get me cookies like this?’ because these are giving him the ability to wind up both Bradley and Tom at the same time, which is a rare and unusual treat. Just like these cookies.

                He takes the Hot stuff biscuit and takes a bite, and it’s tangy with lemon, not sickly-sweet like he was expecting and he finishes it off, ponders whether they’re all the same flavor. Taking another photo to make sure he has the number in full he reaches for the Call me cookie and mmm, yeah, raspberry. He deliberately breaks a few crumbs off and scatters them in the box, eyes the last cookie and decides that Bradley’s wrath is worth it. If he ends up dating the baker then he’ll have an endless supply of cookies. The cookie with the phone number on it is passionfruit flavored and he’s impressed that none of them have crossed the line into sickly sweet. He could have a fourth one, if there was one. Instead he looks at the photos he’s taken, takes another of the empty box with nothing but crumbs. He then sends two pictures, captioned with Before and After… making sure the number is not completely visible. Cookies were delicious. Thanks. Think the bakery person wants to ask you out.

…            …            …

                Jake hasn’t read a person that wrong in a while, the message he’d received yesterday a little surprising. Normally when he flirts with people who are in a relationship they’re quick to let him know, rather than act adorably flustered and like they’ve never been flirted with before. He’d been pretty sure Bradley had been into him, but he shrugs, plenty of other fish in the sea and birds in the sky. He hears the bell ring from the door opening and heads out, the only one not yet elbow deep in baking or decorating, although when he sees Bradley standing at the counter he wants to do an abrupt one-eighty.

                “Morning. How can I help? Was everything okay with the cake?” Jake asks, smoothly professional.

                “Yeah, it was great. It looked amazing and tasted great. Uh. Thanks. I was just wondering…”

                Jake frowns, wonders if the guy is going to ask him out.

                “I was just wondering if you’d be interested in a date?”

                “Your husband let me know in no uncertain terms that you are not available.”

                “What?”

                “What?”

                “I’m not married.”

                “Well, this guy seems to think the opposite,” Jake says, pulling up the message from the number, sliding his phone across the counter, offering it to Bradley to pick it up.

…            …            …

>>The person you gave those cookies to is happily married. While I agree that he is hot stuff, he will not be calling you, he’s mine.

                Bradley frowns, looks at the number and doesn’t immediately recognize it but he’s got an inkling… He pulls out his own phone, starts typing in the number and within five digits it’s showing Ice’s contact information.

                Of fucking course.

                He groans.

                “Find your husband?”

                “Not my husband. My godfather’s husband. My Uncle Ice,” Bradley says, slides both phones back across to Jake to show the matching number. “Mav took the cookies, ate them and sent me a message with a photo of the crumbs. And a before photo, but he didn’t show your whole number, but I, uh, got the message.”

                “Oh…” Jake’s grin is slow, but it’s there and it warms Bradley from inside-out.

                “Ice obviously got a photo with your whole number… And I didn’t need your number, I know where you work.”

                “Yeah, but I was asking you out.”

                “And I’m here to say yes. Well, assuming you’re not scared off by my apparently very possessive Uncle, who I swear won’t have a problem with you as long as you’re not trying to actually ask Mav out, then… yeah. Let’s go out.”

                “I finish at three.”

                “Three. See you then.”

                “Look forward to it.”

[always-andromeda]

Hi, I was wondering if you still take requests? If you don't that is perfectly okay with me, I don't mind! But if you can, would you be willing to write headcanons or something about Javier Peña (Narcos) with an s/o that doesn't really like pda or super affectionate stuff? Again, if you don't want to you don't have, I'm fine either way! (really trying hard not to sound like I'm peer pressuring you or being passive aggressive 😣) but, yeah, like if you ever have time.. thank you so much!

𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 ⟡ Javier Peña x F!Reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ⟡ 600

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 ⟡ Javier learns the different ways of seeing a romantic relationship, or, a drabble about Javier being with a significant other who isn't quite comfortable with his usual charms.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ⟡ Oh, my sweet anon, you don't sound passive aggressive or anything of the sort whatsoever!! If anything, I apologize for taking so long to get to this. I've been trying to urge myself back into writing a little bit more and this was a nice little challenge to help me reach that goal. I've been obsessed with Gia Margaret's album, Romantic Piano, these days and I ended up listening to Ways of Seeing on repeat while prattling down these ideas, so naturally, I've named this piece after that song. This isn't my favorite thing I've ever written? But it's been a hot second since I've been regularly writing fanfic so forgive me lmao.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ⟡ slightly established relationship, Javier crosses a physical boundary, allusions to Javi and reader having a sexual relationship but nothing explicit is described (regardless, minors, please do not interact), overall fluff and healthy communication

He wasn’t used to this. Any of it, really. Having a lady friend was a new one and by far the most surprising turn of his life at that point. But a lady friend who shrugged off his little touches like he was a pesky insect was another thing. At first he figured it was a reputation thing. Having him slung around you in the halls wouldn’t attract the good kind of attention for either of you. He could handle the jabs and jokes; he always had.

It’s why he hadn’t thought too much about it the first time he caught you in front of the copier and placed a hand on your hip. “What’s that you’re working on, querida?” he’d asked in that low, gravelly tone of his that usually drove you wild.

He swore he felt you jump; momentarily startled before you straightened your shoulders and pushed them back. He couldn’t see your expression, but he already knew he wouldn’t find an ounce of reciprocation to his teasing there anyways when you answered firmly, “Messina asked for copies of this report. She’s got a meeting in twenty minutes.”

Javier’s hand slid around your front, fingers playing at the edges of your top. “You think that’d be enough time?” he mumbled.

You swirled around on your heel and glared at him with a raised eyebrow, “For what exactly?”

“I thought that we had something going…?”

“Just because we have something going it doesn’t just give you the freedom to accost me whenever you want.”

Javier took a step back and folded his arms, getting ready to rocket into defensiveness. 

Before he could get a word in, you continued, “I know that you’re comfortable with the flirting and the teasing…but I’m not. It’s fine when it’s just the two of us.” You struggled to get an accurate grasp of your words, “But outside of that…it’s just…uncomfortable? Do you get that?”

His stomach sank as he was reminded of the type of men he’d helped put away in the past. The kind who had no regard for anyone or anything aside from their own wants. He thought of those butterflies in his chest whenever he caught your eye from across a room. How they glittered with the allusion of a secret; that secret being something special that only you and him shared. Your eyes were now shadowed with a layer of caution. How quickly those butterflies of his had turned into an invasive species.

He slowly raised his hands, admitting defeat before divulging, “I apologize. I– I didn’t mean to overstep.”

You blinked a few times before turning back around and grabbing the stack of fresh papers from the printer. “I think we should set some boundaries.”

“Boundaries? What kind of boundaries?”

“Well…for now…let’s keep the public displays of affection at a minimum. Can we do that?”

“Of course. Whatever you need. I hear you,” Javier nodded firmly.

As you started to tell him goodbye and head towards Messina’s office, one more thought popped into his mind. He reached forward to place a hand on you before stopping himself and clearing his throat instead. “Wait–”

“Yeah?”

The corner of his lip curled up into a smug smile. “Just to be clear…we’re still okay on the private displays of affection, right?”

You rolled your eyes and replied, “We’re alright in that department, Peña, don’t you worry.”

“Sounds good, keep me posted if anything changes,” he said with a quick wink before sauntering away, leaving you cradling the warm papers against your chest, knowing that you could tell him if anything did change.

[cowgurrrl]

so, I know TONS of artists do these documentaries or whatever and some of them include intimate and personal moments of their lives. I'm just saying! if rockstar!joel had a little documentary made, I feel like there'd be moments/personal and intimate clips of him and actress!reader together, ones that play out while he talks about her during an interview clip or something and it's just SO 🥹🥹🥹 like he'd be so precious and sweet. i love them so much!!!

Okay wait I know I’ve doing little drabbles recently but this is deserving of its own fic 😭😭 thank you for the beautiful idea!

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Author's note: wait i really love how this turned out

Summary: The Millers: A Year in the Life [2.3k]

Warnings: discussions of the foster care system, marital bliss, emotions, I think that’s it?? This is literally just fluff

You didn't know what to expect when you agreed to have a documentary crew follow you around while Joel was working on his next album. You worried it would burst the little private bubble you've spent your career trying to maintain or bring unwanted attention to your family. It didn't do either of those things. If anything, it helped show the world how strong you are as a family unit. You just didn't realize how much they caught until you and your family attended the premiere to watch it in full for the first time. 

The documentary opens with clips of Joel touring, playing loud music, and showing off his rockstar attitude for the cameras but quickly cuts to a quiet, sunny morning in your house. Joel is up and making coffee in the deserted kitchen, his hair a mess and his eyes bleary as he looks at the camera. "'S this the kinda excitin' thing you guys wanted?" He asks in a gravelly voice before laughing at his own joke. The camera follows him up the stairs and to the primary bedroom, where you're still sleeping. He carefully puts the coffee on your bedside table and sits on the edge of the bed, smoothing your hair out of your face. You groan and curl into his body subconsciously, and he smiles. "We're gonna have to leave soon, but I made you some coffee, and I'm gonna get the kids up so you can rest a little longer, alright?" He asks, and you nod, peeking your head up from under the covers to see the cameras. You have to laugh when you spot your own messy hair on screen.

"Oh, hello." You say to the cameraman before turning back to Joel. "Give me five minutes." 

"You can have ten." 

"I love you." You say as he leans down to kiss you. 

"Love you, too." He says, lingering for a moment or two before getting up and padding down the hallway. They follow him until he asks them to wait in the hallway, not wanting to freak out the kids, and they oblige. His microphone picks up his gentle voice, rousing your teenagers awake. 

"Honey, it's time to get up. We've gotta get ready for Sam's game." He says, and a grumpy shuffling can be heard.

"Can we get donuts?" Violet asks, barely audible, and Joel chuckles. 

"Yeah, baby, we can get donuts. I just need ya to get movin' for me, alright?" 

"Okay." She says. He repeats the process twice before it cuts to Joel wearing a baseball hat at the game, cheering Sam on despite the obvious fatigue in his eyes. There are little clips here and there of the game itself, but nothing super significant. It cuts again to Joel in his studio, getting mic'ed up for a solo interview, and there's a big smile on his face.

"D'you guys already talk to my wife?" He asks, and everyone in the room laughs. "I'm sure she had a lot to say." The way he says it isn't malicious. It's fond. Like he knows you so well, he doesn't even need confirmation that you talked a lot about him. Then, you're on screen in your office with all your awards and pictures of the kids on display behind you, half-directing the production team on the best way to use the space. You don't introduce yourself until everything is settled. 

"I'm an actress, director, producer, mother, and Joel's wife." You say, smiling. 

"What can you tell us about your relationship with Joel?" A producer asks, and you laugh.

"God, how much time do you have?" You ask. It cuts again to Joel, who laughs at the same question and starts spinning his wedding band on his finger. 

"Should I start at the beginning'?" He asks.

"If that's what you want." As soon as the words are spoken, early pictures and videos of you and Joel start playing over the interview answers.

"We met through mutual friends a few years after I'd moved to LA, but we didn't start actually dating until about two months after we met." You say. It's not entirely wrong. 

"I remember thinkin' she was beautiful, intelligent, and caring. I just wanted to be with her all the time." He says.

"We were both so busy and in the public eye that I almost didn't think it was gonna work out because we were always traveling for work or getting stuck in the studio or on set. The first test was when he went home to Texas with his daughters for about a month, and we had to find ways to keep in touch," you remember. "That's also the first time I realized I really, really liked him." 

"Just like?" The producer asks, and you laugh.

"It wasn't love yet. Joel will be the first to tell you he fell first."

"Oh, yeah, it was stupid how in love with her I was," Joel's interview cuts in, and you each laugh at the editing. "I was ready to marry her after our third date."

"He said that?" You ask the producer and laugh when she nods. 

"When did you know you wanted to marry him?" 

"Oh, after I met Sarah and Ellie and saw how good of a dad he was. I mean, are you kidding? What’s not to love about that?"

"I don't wanna say too much 'cause it's not only my story to tell, but we were really young when we had Sarah," Joel's voice jumps back in with pictures of him with a baby Sarah. "I didn't know what our lives were gonna look like with just the two of us, and I was so scared that I was gonna fuck her up. She was so perfect and little and I... I wasn't. I was pretty much on my own until my brother got back from Desert Storm, and he moved in with us. Then, it felt like we were raisin' her and each other," he says. "Ellie was, somehow, a bigger surprise than Sarah was. She was in Sarah's school and havin' a hard time. She'd just gotten kicked out of another foster home, and I thought, 'Why doesn't she come stay with us?' I think I thought it would be a temporary thing, but she became a part of my heart. We always say she's not our daughter by blood but by soul, and then there was no way I could live without both my girls. So, we filled out the adoption paperwork and she became ours when she was twelve and Sarah was fourteen. So yeah, I was a single dad for a long time before I met my wife." 

"I want to make it abundantly clear I wasn't scared of the girls. I was scared of ruining their lives by dating their father." You say, laughing at how crazy it sounds now. "I hadn't ever dated someone with kids before, so it was all new! But the girls were so kind and so wonderful. And I don't even know when it happened, but suddenly, I wasn't calling them Joel's girls. I was calling them the girls or our girls. The love was so organic it didn't phase anyone when I started claiming them, too. Granted, that wasn't until we'd been together for quite a while, but still."

"We met her… I wanna say it was a few months after they'd started dating," Sarah says, suddenly appearing on the screen. "She was really cool, and I remember telling Dad how much I liked her. She would come over and help with homework, and we'd do movie nights with all four of us. It felt like we were a family long before they got married."

"Oh, yeah. I mean, it's hard not to like her, y'know?" Ellie says. "Coming from foster care and everything, I remember being hesitant when she came into our lives just because I've had mother figures come in and out for a majority of my life, so I was kinda bracing myself for that. But she didn't do that. She stayed and made our lives better for it." 

"She was never just some person our dad was dating or a stepmom. She was always Mom to us." Sarah says. 

"Yeah, I don't think I've ever called her my stepmom," Ellie laughs. "There was a period of time before they got married where we called her by her name, and then by the time Sam came around, we were both calling her Mom because that's what she is. She's our mom."

"When we were gettin' married, we had friends in the industry tell us, 'y'know marriage is hard, but being married while all this is goin' on is so much harder.' And that was really scary. I'd been through a divorce before, and I didn't want to put either of us through that. Leading up to the wedding, we talked about everything. What we wanted, what we expected from each other, what we wanted our lives to look like, and she was so fuckin' patient with me. She always is. And the day of, y'know, five million things are going through my head, and I'm freakin' out, but when I saw her," Joel gets choked up and has to take a deep breath before he can continue. "That all went away. All I cared about was her."

"We got married in his parent's backyard with like thirty other people there. We didn't want a big wedding and all the drama that came with that. Literally, nobody knew about our wedding except the people who were invited and the photographer, and it was perfect. I would do it all over again if he asked me to."

"That's it? That's all the detail we get?" The producer asks playfully, obviously on the edge of her seat for more, and you nod. 

"Yep." You smile. You go on to talk about the births of Sam and the twins and how that changed everything in your lives before the documentary returns to your day-to-day. 

The documentary catches a bunch of special moments you would've never caught otherwise like Joel calling you down to the studio to play you a riff because he's so vulnerable when he first writes a song. You're the only one he trusts with that vulnerability. "What d'you think?" He asks, looking up from the frets with worry lining his face. "I think it's great. What were you thinking for drums?" You ask because you know he's already thinking ten steps ahead. He shifts through his papers to find what he wrote down. When he finishes explaining it to you, you step closer to him, rub away the line between his eyebrows, and kiss the crown of his head, his hands coming around to hold your waist. "Sounds like you've got a hit on your hands."

Or the kids all joining in on a jam sesh when they're all home at the same time. With Sam's baseball schedule and the older girls' families, friends, and lives, it's hard to find time for all seven of you to get together. But by some miracle, all the Millers find a way home at the same time, and the cameras catch them all in the studio, playing song after song just because they can. They play for so long that the camera crew had to ask you how long you thought they'd go. "Oh, they'll go all night if you let them." You say with a huge smile on your face. Your family was all under one roof. How could you not be ecstatic?

Or when Joel visited you on set with flowers when you were having a rough day. He found you sitting in your trailer with your head in your hands, tears rolling down your cheeks, and he quickly asked the camera crew to stay outside. His mic stayed on and picked up everything. "I don't think I can do this." You cried into his shirt. You were still relatively new to directing and had hit a wall. It felt like things kept stacking up against you, and you were so tired. 

"What's goin' on? Talk to me." He said, and you quickly dove into exactly what was wrong, fighting tears the whole time. When you finished crying, he kissed all over your face and whispered affirmations to you. "You can do this, okay? These are just little hiccups. If anyone can handle them, it's you. Just take a second to breathe and tell me what I can do to help you." 

"I don't know. I don't know." Your voice got thick with emotion again, and he shushed you gently. 

"Why don't we get you somethin' to eat, and then we can talk bout it? How's that sound?" He asked, and you hummed. 

The screen fades to black during your crying session in the trailer, and suddenly, you hear Ryan's shaky, loving voice announcing your name at the Oscars for Best Director. It cuts to you sitting there, stunned into silence, as everyone around you claps. Seeing those two clips so close together made you tear up and reach for Joel's hand in the theatre. The rest of the documentary goes through his recording process until the Grammy's, where he won three for the album being documented. In the last few minutes, it returns to Joel in his studio, picking at his nails.

"It is hard. I'm not gonna sit up here and pretend like just cause I've been in it for a while, I'm better at managing it all. I'm not. There are a million things I'm sure I'm doin' wrong, or I've fucked up. But my family, they love me despite everything," he says. "Every day, I wake up, and I choose them. Without them…" he trails off, tears welling in his eyes. "Without them, I'm nothin'. Most of the time, I don't feel half good enough to deserve them, but I'm tryin' to be better. I think that's all I can do. It's all I wanna do." With those wise words from the man you love so much, the credits start rolling on The Millers: A Year in the Life, and everyone in the theatre stands and claps. You turn to Joel and kiss him, with tears falling from both of you and smile against him.

When you agreed to have a documentary crew follow you around, you were sure what to expect. You didn't think your day-to-day lives were anything spectacular, but seeing them edited together like that, you see how wrong you were. You forgot how special it is to share your life with him and find sweet moments between all the chaos. For as private as you try to be, you're glad that, in a hundred years or so— when you and Joel are long gone, and your kids are old— people will be able to watch this and see how much you loved each other. How you chose each other time and time again. How you celebrated each other's wins and mourned the losses together. 

A wise man once told you that the best decision he'd ever made was marrying his wife one hot Texas day many moons ago. Now, more than twenty years later, you'd be inclined to agree with him. It's hard and not always the best of times, but if you could go back in time, you wouldn't change a single thing. You'd sign the contract, go on the fake dates, fall in love, move to Ireland, and rekindle your relationship all over again if it meant you'd have a sliver of the happiness you have now. 

Best decision ever.

TAGLIST: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha @cosmoscoffeee @shyminnie07 @beezusvreeland @eddiemunsonsbedroom @harriedandharassed @doodlebob-mp3

[lickthecowhappy]

The three songs in the Small Back Room represent the three seasons

I want to talk about the three songs that play in The Small Back Room. They seem specific and I have thoughts on them but I would love to read more opinions. At the moment, I have two main theories about the choices and their sequence. There is probably more to it than I see but I’ll focus on just one here. I also think that threes are more important that we realize and the fact that there are three instances of the audience hearing music in the shop is significant. I also think it’s interesting that Aziraphale heard two songs and Crowley one, and which they each heard.

The three songs that we hear in The Small Back Room are:

You Don’t Own Me by Lesley Gore from the album Lesley Gore Sings Of Mixed-Up Hearts (This plays in episode 1 when Aziraphale goes to see Maggie about the “ugrent” matter.)

You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me by Dusty Springfield from the album You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me (This plays when Aziraphale goes into the shop to ask about the song Jim was singing. Maggie is “not crying” about being rejected by Nina.)

Comin’ In On A Wing And A Prayer (published in 1943) (This song is playing when Crowley goes to make sure Maggie is on her way to the Whickber Street traders and shopkeepers monthly meeting.)

For this analysis I will assume they represent the themes of Seasons 1-3, and that they are chronological.

You don't own me I'm not just one of your many toys

You Don’t Own Me represents the abandoning of their sides. It’s a song intended to say “I’ll go along with you as far as I can but don’t try to tie me down.” The lyrics are a declaration that the listener doesn’t hold any ownership over the singer, the singer has full autonomy and won’t accept any attempt to be changed or restrained. This tracks with season 1. It’s heard by Aziraphale very early in s2e1, before Jim even shows up. Aziraphale and Crowley go along with their sides in season 1 but ultimately choose their own autonomy (what’s right) at the risk of destruction.

When I said I needed you You said you would always stay It wasn't me who changed but you and now you've gone away Don't you see that now you've gone And I'm left here on my own That I have to follow you and beg you to come home

You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me represents separation and the absence of commitment. The song details that the singer is in love with the listener who has seemed to change their mind and abandoned them. The singer insists that the listener need not make a verbal declaration of love but just to be accessible. It is heard when Maggie is “not crying” over Nina and their uncomfortable feelings, and while Aziraphale is trying to uncover (unbeknownst to him) another romance. This is consistent with the results of season 2. Aziraphale has seemingly abandoned their side after Crowley’s request to remain close at hand. A romance that has been, up until now, mutually unspoken but mutually felt.

Comin' in on a wing and a prayer Comin' in on a wing and a prayer With our one motor gone We can still carry on Comin' in on a wing and a prayer

Comin’ In On A Wing And A Prayer represents reliance on hope in a desperate situation. This song is the origin of the common idiom meaning exactly that. “Things look bleak, but we have a chance.” Our plane is crippled but we’re all alive, we’ve achieved our goal, and we might yet land safely. It is heard when Crowley reminds Maggie of the meeting, and I think that it is significant that it’s the only one he hears and the only one Aziraphale doesn’t hear. If this song represents season 3, one driving force is out of commission; non-responsive. But there are still other forces at work and the listener should keep faith.

But what if these songs are all present as emotional manipulation?

[inarizqkis]

everlongㅡl.mh

summary! in which you see minho in the most unexpected way.

warnings! guitarist! reader, former nct member! reader, fluff, chan makes a surprise appearance?? 😱

fem aligned/identifying dni. you will be blocked idc if ur she/they, they/she, she/her. i check every interaction.

reblogs are appreciated! enjoy :)

you smiled, waving at fans while up on stage. you were currently on tour, and had just recently come out with a new album with your band. you had just finished a song from the previous album, and were about to play the main song on your new album, but you and your band members were taking a break, interacting with fans.

"you! with the blue hair, come up here, please!" you had called up a fan, smiling. you nodded at the bodyguards, letting them know that it was okay to bring the fan up.

"what's your name?" you asked as you helped her on stage, taking her hand in yours.

"i'm jenni! oh my gosh, i'm a huge fan, i've been your fan since like 2017 when you were in nct, and i really appreciate you for all you've done." the girl rambled nervously, and you smiled listening to her.

"thank you so much for being here, jenni! i appreciate it a lot, it sounds like you've been a fan for quite a while, yeah?" you replied, and she nodded.

"is there anyone you'd like to shout out? maybe family, friends, significant other?" you asked, and she took the mic from your hands gently.

"yeah, i'd just like to give a huge thank you to my girlfriend, parker, she's the light of my life, and actually the one who introduced me to your music!" she said, and you nodded.

"thank you to jenni and parker for being great fans, we hope you both have a great night, and that you have a long and happy relationship!" you smiled, and she hugged you. you hugged her from the side, and helped her down from the stage.

"let's see.. how about this gentleman in the black shirt? wanna come up here?" you pointed, and he looked around before pointing at himself. you nodded, smiling encouragingly, unable to see his face clearly as he had a mask and hat on, and he got up, making his way onto the stage. you gave him a hand, pulling him up.

"so what's your name?" you asked, and he took off his mask, smiling, and you recognized him.

"holy shit," you said, turning away and covering your face, laughing as you held the mic away for a second. he laughed, while waving to the fans who apparently recognized him. "can somebody get this man a mic? this is my brother, he can introduce himself."

a staff member handed your bandmate an extra microphone, and minsu, the bassist, handed it to you. you gave it to the smiling blonde, who dramatically cleared his throat.

"what's up, LA! i'm bang chan! i hope you guys are having fun and staying rested." he introduced, bowing, and you smiled brightly, hugging him.

"what's happenin'? i didn't know we were touring at the same time?" you replied, and he smiled cheekily.

"i wanted to surprise you. that, and someone wanted to tag along," he said, and pointed to his group member and your current boyfriend, who waved, along with the rest of stray kids.

"wait, so he's here? he saw me perform?" you said in disbelief, and chan nodded, laughing. you felt yourself get hot with a flush, and if it was visible, it was definitely almost as red as the guitar you had been carrying, which had been on your back comfortably as you scratched the back of your head. the crowd laughed at your reaction, cheering.

"yeah! we're waiting for your main song, mate." chan replied, and you nodded, face still flush.

"okay, okay, i'll be performing it after you get off the stage." you replied, lightly shoving him jokingly, and he laughed, putting his hands up in surrender.

"alright, alright, give me another second to talk to my favorite bro, yeah? don't tell lucas i said that." chan said, looking at the crowd as he said the last part.

"okay, hurry up, then, i'm sure everyone's ready to hear it, right?" you asked, smiling, and the crowd yelled. chan smiled proudly, before turning the mic off, handing it to the staff that was on the side of the stage, and patting your shoulder proudly. he grinned, waving at the crowd, before going back to his seat.

"alright, los angeles! make some noise!" you said into the mic, and the crowd cheered. they cheered even louder once hearing the band beginning to play, and you quickly put the mic onto the stand, before getting ready to play the guitar.

"this song is dedicated to my boyfriend, he knows who he is." you said, winking over at minho, who smiled. you began playing the chords to the title song, everlong, and the crowd slowly died down, still cheering but listening to the song.

after the concert was over, you bid your band members goodnight, thanking them for their hard work, and got into your designated van. you laughed as you saw some fans scream, and you turned your phone flashlight on, waving along with your band members.

soon enough you were at your hotel, and chan texted you, asking if the group could come over.

'sounds good! come over anytime, i'm here for another week then i'm off to vegas :)' you texted back, and 10 minutes later, you could hear the large group in the hallway. you opened the door, smiling once you saw your boyfriend, and gave him a small kiss on the cheek, holding the door open with your foot.

"hyung, you were so good! should i come to another concert?" felix complimented, sitting on your bed, a pillow from the couch already tucked in his arms as he rested his chin on it.

"thanks, lix. i mean, if you want to, you could come to another show." you smiled bashfully, shrugging, minho latched onto you like a koala. felix looked at chan, who shrugged in reply.

"i have to ask the manager, but we'll see." chan told him, and he nodded, grinning. you and the boys messed around and talked about how each experience went for the tour, as they were finishing up theirs, but you had a few more shows to perform.

"jagi, are you staying here for the night?" you murmured, as he nodded tiredly.

"if it's okay with you." he mumbled, and you smiled, playing with his hair gently, as you nodded, before talking with the other members.

as it hit about 1, many of the kids were getting tired, even with the conversations and the excitement, so they all left to go to their room which, coincidentally, had been a couple floors down from yours.

"lino-ya, go change into some pajamas, hm?" you said softly, and he nodded, rubbing his eye sleepily, getting up from laying on you.

after he had come back, he flopped onto your bed with a yawn, and you chuckled softly at his antics. due to how famous the two of you were, you couldn't come out, but nonetheless the two of you were content with being able to have this little secret.

"tired?" you said softly, crawling into bed next to him, turning off the dim lamp. you had already turned off the big light, and the room was dark now.

he nodded, rolling onto you as he layed on your chest, wrapping his arm around your waist. you smiled, wrapping your arm around him, letting out your own soft yawn.

the two of you fell asleep shortly after that, your limbs tangled together as the two of you slept contently, even on the slightly stiff mattress with the tightly tucked in bedding, the both of you slept with soft smiles on your faces.

all rights reserved © inarizqkis 2023. do not repost, rewrite, or translate.

[transvampireboyfriend]

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

A few joints and some charades rounds later, they all start yawning.

The night gets cold and they start walking back to the cabin.

Argyle and Nance go first, complaining that it's too cold for them to keep trying to guess or make hand gestures themselves. They grab their trash bag and head back.

The fire burns down into embers as the rest of them play a last round of charades.

The game turns into a music discussion and then that turns into Steve and Eddie sharing music with each other, discussing  the albums their moms played when they were little, while Jonathan and Robin excitedly discuss music instruments and how they first learned to read music sheets.

They don't even notice that Robs and Jon get up to leave until Robin calls back to Steve.

"You better not be too loud when you come back, Dingus, I'm going straight to bed" she says,

It's her way of saying 'we're leaving, so you and Eddie can be alone'.

Steve loves her so much. He gives her two thumbs up and she laughs.

"You know I never imagined our musical meeting point would be Billie Holiday," Eddie muses, not moving from his place next to Steve,

Steve's smile grows wider and he tears his eyes away from Robin to turn back to Eddie.

"I feel like it makes sense" Steve says,

"Yeah?" Eddie asks.

His chocolate eyes roam Steve's face and Steve is reminded of him doing the same thing that week when they (officially) met, Eddie's mouth smiling around his name and making Steve's heart skip a beat.

"Yeah. Somehow." Steve says, thinking of songs that are way too romantic for him to be thinking about right now.

Eddie smiles too, his nose is all red from being outside all day and Steve wants to touch it, wants to feel the little bit of sun that now lives in his skin. Instead, he basks in being the sole focus of his attention.

He sees Eddie's eyes drift up, where his bandana is still sitting against Steve's hair.

"Do you need it back?" Steve asks, "Do you have an emotional connection to this thing?" he teases,

Eddie snickers, "If I didn't before-" he trails off,

Steve feels butteflies flutter about his stomach, he tries to hide his giddiness and elbows Eddie's side.

Eddie laughs and sways with it before he straightens up again,

"No, but, what I was thinking was-" Eddie starts, reaching up to tug on the scrunchie that he's wearing, letting his hair fall down to his shoulders again.

Steve's smile fades as he watches the strands fall around him, Eddie is so pretty, Steve wants to comb his fingers through his hair, use it to tilt his head back. He catches a whiff of strawberry shampoo and tries to stop himself from eagerly breathing it in.

"Since you seem so happy grabbing my things," Eddie's saying, "maybe you could take care of this for me?"

He holds the scruchie up and doesn't wait for an answer, grabbing one of Steve's wrists.

His fingers are warm against Steve's cooling skin.

"Nance would kill me if I lose it, so it's important that I don't." Eddie explains, placing the accessory on Steve's wrist and holding it there,

"Do you think I could trust you with it?" Eddie asks, his eyes finding Steve's again.

His eyes draw Steve in, he feels hypnotized and the question feels weighted, like Eddie's not just talking about the scrunchie.

Steve feels like he's standing at the edge of a precipice, he's always let himself fall in way too deep, way too fast. But somehow, now, with Eddie, it doesn't feel like a dangerous thing.

Enough time has passed that he trusts Eddie. Really, he did since the beginning, but now, Steve feels like he knows him, and trusts what he knows of him, and he wants Eddie to trust him too.

He licks his lips and answers "Yeah. You can." his voice is weighed down by the significance of what they're saying and he hopes his half-whisper lets Eddie know he means it, for this and for anything else he might be asking.

Eddie half-smiles, a small thing that Steve's never seen before and feels sweeter than all the s'mores they've eaten tonight.

"Thank you." Eddie whispers, leaning into the space between them almost imperceptibly, but Steve notices.

He realizes he's smiling back and leans in too, their shoulders brushing. They're both focused on the others' lips, breathing shallowly, and just as Steve's about to close the distance,

"Guys! can you bring back the popcorn bowls?" Nancy yells from the cabin,

Startled, they both immediately jump apart.

Steve clears his throat so hard he ends up coughing a little.

Eddie sighs heavily.

"Would've thrown them into the fucking fire, if we still had one," he grumbles under his breath,

Steve snorts and feels his cheeks burning up as he chuckles. Eddie looks at him and joins in.

"GUYS!" it's Jonathan this time, making them both jump in their seats again.

"Yuh-huh! Coming!" Eddie yells back, he turns to Steve and shakes his head, rolling his eyes like they're the most annoying thing to ever happen to him.

Steve loves his theatrics. He bites his lip to keep from laughing out loud.

Finally, Eddie gets up from his seat, picks up the bowls and looks at Steve again.  When he finds him beaming, Eddie winks. Steve wants to melt into the ground.

"Come on," Eddie says, jerking his head to the side,"before they come drag us by the ears,"

Steve huffs. He wipes his hands on his thighs, trying to sober up.

When he stands up and grabs their cooler, Eddie extends a hand out to him, an uncertain look on his face.

Steve doesn't hesitate to take it, interlacing their fingers together.

⋆ * ⋆🌙 ⋆ * ⋆

Eddie feels a current of energy go through him when Steve interlaces their fingers.

He feels jittery with it, wants to swing their hands back and forth, but settles for swiping his thumb over Steve's wrist as they walk, his finger softly jostling the scrunchie he put there earlier.

After a few paces, Steve subtly steps closer to Eddie. His sleeves are still rolled up all the way and Eddie can see him shivering a bit.

"You cold?" Eddie asks,

"Mmhm." Steve confirms, "Why? are you gonna throw another vest at me?"

It catches Eddie off guard, startles a laugh out of him and leaves Steve looking so smug, squeezing their hands.

"I'm not sorry," Eddie says, "you wore that thing for hours,"

Steve grins, "Still do." he counters, his smile is so bright, Eddie can't get enough of it.

"Hmm," Eddie nods, "it looks good on you", he adds,

Steve looks up at him and their eyes get stuck together for a few steps.

Until Eddie has to go and trip over nothing.

"Fuck." Eddie mutters under his breath, immediately jumping into a wide stance so he won't bring them both tumbling down.

"Oop. Careful" Steve says at the same time, extending the hand holding the cooler in front of them to prevent Eddie from falling over.

Steve looks at his stance then, and apparently finds it funny, "Are you okay?" he asks, his honeyed eyes telling on the laugh he's holding back.

Eddie softly yanks on their joined hands in protest but can't help the smile that mirrors Steve's.

"Don't. Laugh at me." Eddie chuckles,

"I'm not! " Steve laughs,

Eddie shakes his head and resumes their walk, dragging Steve along by their joined hands.

Steve catches up quickly, now boldly pressing their sides together.

"Almost there" Eddie tells him, feeling a bit helpless because he was gonna offer his jacket, but now he feels silly.

"I think I'll make it" Steve whispers, copying Eddie's earlier motion, rubbing his thumb against Eddie's palm.

His skin is so soft and warm, it makes Eddie want to drag Steve's hand up and place it against the back of his own neck. He tries not to shiver at the thought.

When they get to the cabin, Eddie opens the door for Steve and is rewarded by a squeeze of his hand before Steve lets go.

Steve's amber eyes shine in the front porch's yellow light and he whispers a small 'thank you' as he goes in before Eddie.

Eddie thinks if Steve doesn't stop being so sweet, his heart is gonna fly out of his chest.

part 8

[toomuchracket]

She should keep the M! But they should have a very angsty conversation mid sex about her having thought about removing it, something like:

He traces the M on her thigh with his finger, then his tongue, looking up at her and staring into her eyes the entire time. She can’t take his gaze and looks away, knowing how close she’d come to obliterating it.

He notices, of course, and pauses.

“Baby, what’s wrong? Do you want me to stop? Are we moving to fast? Because I don’t want to rush y—“

“No, ‘s not too fast,” she shakes her head, biting her lip before locking eyes again.

A beat passes. Several more. He waits for her to speak again, chin propped on her thigh, looking up at her intently.

In a whisper: “I almost had it removed. Maybe I still should.”

love this but i think it would hit even more if the last bit was in a totally separate convo!! so the realisation that the tat is still there can happen after you reunite at the macs' party, and you tell matty you came close to getting rid of it but ultimately didn't - he does some romantic "mine, my girl, still" shit with the tat and it's very tender and sweet. and then things are good for a while, for months, until ttpd listening and the realisation that the significance of the m on the upper thigh is not a unique experience to you lmfao; matty uses your phone to order dinner and sees the tattoo removal google search and asks you about it (and mind you you've been very quiet since listening to the album), and THEN comes the "i think i was perhaps right when i planned to get it removed. i thought it meant something to us, and only us. clearly not" oooooooooooooooooooh. there won't be another breakup like i can't do that again lol, but it'll be a tough one for matty to fix <3

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Suga has to be the best gatekept secret in BTS. He is so beautiful, cute, caring, charming, and funny!!! After months of questioning your taste ranking him second after Jimin in visuals when tkk is right there!, I'm sorry to say I was wrong. Yoongi is THE visual. I'm not going to the concerts but every photo I see on Twitter makes me wish I was going BPP. Does it sound like I'm getting wrecked? It's because I am. I relate to your other anon so bad haahaha. Before this tour, only Jimin and Jung Kook turned my head, but Suga now owns my soul. Is this how people become true OT7? Through BTS concerts?

*

Ask 2: Anyhow, did you notice how obsessed (maybe too heavy a word) Yoongi is with BS&T Jimin?? I just noticed after Suchwita. I think he really likes & remembers bst Jimin fondly & fervently. Please correct my delusion, if you think it's farfetched. (While reading your blogs and army detective twts, I'm realizing more and more how clueless and unobservant I am. I've given up being astute in noticing these matters and just gonna outsource these insightful findings to others. haha) +

But I think, Yoongi really LOVES bst Jimin. I mean who wouldn't?!? I just watched the MV & performances, and WOW JIMIN!!!! My words don't do bst jimin justice. That head tilt?! the fluttering of his eyelids?! his hand motion? his jaw line? the way he glides?! I see a ballroom behind him! GAH. the song is a BOP. I'm absolutely mesmerized, and let's be real, who can blame Yoongi for forgetting how to close his mouth in front of jimin! I want members reacting to mvs back!! T T

***

Hi Anon(s),

I started reading your asks giggling, by the time I got to the end I was full on howling lmaooo. Anon in ask 2, I too want the guys reacting to their MVs back, just cause we'll see them all going "Ahh, Jimin!"

Anon in ask 1, sigh, you have no idea what you’re in for with Yoongi.

Maybe all Yoongi biases are the same, because I truly feel like gatekeeping everything about him and I see that impulse in other Yoongi biases too. I’m very selfish with Yoongi.

You mentioned his visuals and him being caring etc, so let me try something here. It’s easy for me to talk about Jimin, but near impossible for me to talk about Yoongi, so I’m going to try talking about Yoongi through some of his actions with Jimin. And I’ll sprinkle in some okay pictures of him I don’t mind sharing, since you’ve acquired a taste for his visuals as well. :)

First, a preamble of his delectable visuals:

(ASDHJKJLSHKSADLK)

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When people typically talk about Yoonmin, they stick to a rotation of Yoongi’s mouth hanging open watching Jimin, Jimin’s teasing of Yoongi, their bickering, etc. This is a jikook space so we hear all the time about how Jungkook looks out for Jimin, cares for him, encourages him and protects him. JK is introverted so when he becomes very assertive, usually on account of Jimin, it stands out. Yoongi too is introverted, but when he deals with Jimin he doesn't really break character, and so, oftentimes his quiet encouragement of Jimin, the significance of his actions, typically goes under the radar for a lot of people.

For example,

I'm not sure how many people realize how big a deal it was for Yoongi to recommend Jimin for A&R director when the boys were making BE. Jimin has said during that time, he felt lost - with their tour getting canceled, all their plans upended with no end in sight, the pandemic had taken away his core reason to live by his own admission i.e. performing for ARMYs. He was starting to drift and become unmoored (emotions we now see in Alone), and so Yoongi recognizing that, and recommending that Jimin take on the responsibility for determining the direction of their self-driven album, to get Jimin "closer to music again", is a small thing, but I see it as one of many ways Yoongi was pushing Jimin to better express and assert himself in that situation. Advice that Jimin finally took to heart during their Vegas concerts, when he began pursuing his solo music in force. The A&R role would’ve typically gone to RM since he drives most of their songwriting and oftentimes sets the tone of their music with BH, but Yoongi pushing for Jimin to be active, with Jimin eventually writing some songs for BE (though those were rejected), registered in my mind as yet another way Yoongi sees Jimin in ways many of the members don’t, and quietly advocates for him. Pushes him to go out of his comfort zone, because of how much he loves him. RM eventually took on a more active role during BE but Jimin being able to come on YouTube lives in Fall 2020 to talk about things he was doing for BE, those glimpses into him starting to find himself again, those details registered for me in ways I’m not sure I can properly express.

Yoongi sees Jimin, and loves him dearly. And it's mutual.

(I've never cared for animal prints but that leopard-print furry hat on Yoongi... he's a big cat)

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Another moment I want to highlight is their 2016 Festa dinner. You know the one, where Taehyung talks about how Jimin grabs the spotlight/center. Yoongi was the first to come to Jimin's defense, saying how Jimin just naturally knows how to be a good performer, that a friend had told him that Jimin naturally knows how to act on stage to capture the audience. I'm not sure if it's obvious to many people, but that comment shifted the direction of the conversation, and soon other members were talking about how good and confident a performer Jimin is. J-hope would later say he's learned about performing by watching Jimin, and Jungkook would say this in later years too.

(… I have no words)

Yoongi saw Jimin's potential since way back in pre-debut, encouraging him and advocating for Jimin to be added to the final line-up in BTS, and has supported him in key periods of doubt since. Everyone saw how hard Jimin was working as one of the last trainees to join a nearly bankrupt agency with limited resources to train even just 7 people - I can't imagine the anxiety Jimin had to deal with but I imagine it was so much. And so when Jimin talks about that period and nearly always mentions how Yoongi supported him, I don't take it lightly.

(There's a reason Yoongi will always choose Jimin)

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[Full disclosure here, but yoonmin's antics during the whole Shadow/Daechwita MVs shooting drives me to near madness. Because if you understand what Yoongi is, (which Jimin does btw), you'd see why this is borderline one of the most homoerotic unresolved cases we've ever had in Bangtan history.

If not for the fact that Jungkook exists, I'd be in a very different blog space right now honest to God. And I'll just leave it at that. ]

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Whew! Okay, I need a break so enough about Yoonmin for now. I’ll try to focus more on Yoongi now.

Anon in ask 1, his pictures on Twitter is what’s fucking you up? Then welcome to my world lool. What got me initially though, was his music. Like, weeks later and I’m still struggling with myself not to loop D-DAY 40 hours a day 10 days a week. The fact he makes music like HUH?! while looking like this

(…and the fact this isn’t even in the top 30 hottest pictures I have of him. Just…)

I’ve written sonnets and poems about his voice and it still doesn’t feel enough to explain what it does to me.

(More Yoongi…)

(…just because…)

(…he’s that perfect.)

Good luck to you becoming a Yoongi bias because I have no idea how I’ve been surviving all these years. If we’re both still standing by the time this tour is over, please stop by my inbox again to tell me how you’re doing. I’d love to hear all about it. :)