#attempt at book designs inspired by show. why does no one ever draw these guys

[knightsickness]

the grinning smilers

[lurafita]

Rich!Tony/Artist!Peter, part 2

Go here for Part 1

Okay. Gotta be honest, this part isn’t that much more interesting than the first part was. But I did some actual research for this one and most of the artworks described in the text were inspired (or unashamedly stolen) from this site: https://theartofeducation.edu/2017/10/26/11-fascinating-artists-inspired-science/

So, let’s get this done!

The Art of Science and the Science of Art

While self-satisfaction might not be very virtuous, Pepper couldn't help the proud smirk that spread over her face, as she watched Tony all but fawn over the different artworks.

“Are you seeing this, Pep? This is a glass model of a magnified virus cell. They installed tiny light sources in specific places and angles to show how and where the cell interacts with the human body. And then there is a whole other set of lights and mirrors that indicates which parts are targeted and gradually destroyed by an antiviral drug. Actually, the way the mirrors are positioned here... yep. If you go around the pedestal and look at it from the different angles, it's like a little movie. First you see the lights indicating the parasitic effect of the virus on the body, then the way the drugs counteract the effects, and once you reach full circle; Ah, see here? Now the lights and the mirrors and the shadows create the effect that the virus evaporated. Damn, that's clever.”

Tony walked around the pedestal once more, trying to make out the positions and calculate the angles of all the lights and mirrors used.

Pepper's previous gleeful smirk softened, as she watched her boss move on to the next exhibit, a gorgeous piece created with metals and specially coated glass. The reflected images and light created 'Sun Drawings', that moved and changed in response to sunlight and the passage of time.

Having been Tony Stark's personal assistant for almost 8 years now, Pepper had learned much about the inner machinations of the man. And at his very center, Tony Stark was an engineer. A mechanic. He could talk theoretical physics with the best of them, but he preferred practical results. Tony's work had a purpose, a direct impact.

Which was one of the reasons why he wasn't normally swayed by art.

“Okay, this here? Classic movie effects. Chemical reactions used to visualize the images of a nuclear explosion, but it all happens under a microscope.”

While the billionaire could certainly appreciate beautiful art, something that was nothing more than 'nice to look at' held no value to him. It was the same reason why he had tons of one night stands, and hardly any actual relationships in his life. He was at first attracted to a person's physical beauty, which usually led to sex. But when the sexual need had been sated, mere physical attraction wasn't enough to keep him interested in the person he had bedded the night before.

“Now this, this is art. Applied physics at its finest. Do you see how the magnets interact with and against each others polarity? This is a perfect demonstration of the symbolism behind the theory of gravitational forces.”

It was why Pepper had jumped on the chance to get her hands on the tickets to Peter Parker's first ever art exhibition. He had been steadily making a name for himself over the last two years, and the redhead had seen some of his early works while she was on vacation in Europe. The young man had been set up in a corner of a street market in Marseilles, and with the help of various visual and practical effects, had explained the complex mechanics behind aerodynamic principles, to his wide eyed and utterly fascinated audience.

“A model of Nikola Tesla's early design for a solar collector made by modern computer code. See this section here? That's programming code for data extraction. In this context, it translates to Tesla's attempt to convert the energy of solar rays into electrical power. It serves as a parallel between combining old and new resources. See? This is the kind of art one can actually talk about. Not a painting of a stupid fruit bowl.”

Whereas Tony used his genius and understanding of different areas of science to create and improve, Parker used his to teach and inspire. Parker's art was something that Tony could not only relate to, but also admire, because it had purpose beyond it's beauty.

The hour that Tony had initially given himself to suffer through the showcase had long since passed, as the billionaire found himself unable to curb any of his enthusiasm, as he grew ever more fascinated with every new piece of art. Other people milling about the rooms 'oohed' and 'aahed' as they inspected the different works of the artist, sipping on their glasses of complementary champagne. But Tony doubted they could truly grasp the idea; the genius behind it all.

He was going to buy it all. The whole exhibit. Everything. He wanted those pieces in his company, in his home, in his workshop. He wanted to have the computer coded Tesla piece in his office, as a symbol of Stark Industries work on renewable energy. He wanted to gift the glass model of the virus cell to Bruce, to celebrate the biochemist's latest break through in the field.

He wanted both the magnetic force field work and the microscopic chemical reactions in his workshop, as a source of constant inspiration. His fingers itched with the want to create, the need to pour his skills into his work.

He wanted... He wanted to meet the artist.

When they had made their way almost full circle around the exhibit, they stopped at what appeared to be the last of the show cases. This one was different from the rest. For one, it was made out of Play Dough, though that was a fact Tony only realized by reading the description. How the hell this Parker guy had managed to form a completely genuine looking circuit board out of such an inferior material as children's clay, he could only guess.

He wanted to talk to the artist.

Another thing that struck Tony was that this circuit board looked somehow familiar.

He leaned in closer.

“This one section here looks like a rather awkward welding job. The connections between the wires seem a bit clumped. I would put it down to the use of Play Dough, but the other details on the board are so clean... You know, this looks almost like-”

“-the circuit board you built when you were five years old.”

Both surprised by the new voice, Pepper and Tony quickly turned around. Just a step behind them stood a young man, dressed in a casual but nice enough suit, with deep brown eyes, fluffy looking chestnut hair and a shy smile. Pepper recognized the man she had seen in France right away, and held out her hand to him.

“Mr. Parker. It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Virginia Potts. But please, feel free to call me Pepper. Everyone does.”

The artist took her hand with a pleasant smile.

“In this case, I insist on Peter. And the pleasure is mine, Pepper.”

Tony could hardly wait for the handshake to end, to insert himself into the introduction.

“So you are the surprisingly gorgeous face behind all these beauties. I'm-”

“Tony Stark. I know. I'm a big fan of your work, Mr. Stark.” Parker smiled brightly (and blushing heavily) at him and eagerly reached for his hand. Then he shyly nodded to the pedestal display. “Your earliest work included.”

He wanted...

“Just Tony will do. One question, though. Why Play Dough? I may not have been very skilled with the welding equipment back then, but I do remember using the actual parts needed.”

Peter turned to his work, a helpless sort of smile on his lips, as he explained.

“When I was in my last year of highschool, and it was time to make a decision regarding college, I felt helplessly defeated. Was I supposed to attend one that focused on all the things that fascinated me about science, or one that focused on all the things I loved about art? I didn't know if I would ever be able to meet the expectations others had placed upon me, and the ones I had placed upon myself. I became wary and anxious about every choice I made. Constantly questioning myself if it was worth it to try to combine the things I loved, or if I wouldn't be able to hold on to both at the same time. Science versus art. Wanting to pursue such opposite things seemed ridiculous. But then my teacher gave us the task of writing a paper about a person that had greatly influenced our society and progress. I chose to write about you. And during my research, I found an old newspaper article, front page, about the young Stark prodigy, who was already showing the whole world how smart he was. The ordinary 5 year old makes crayon drawings and forms simple shapes out of Plasticine. A few can already read some of their children's books, but many are still more focused on the pictures in them. But the 5 year old you broke out of the limitations perceived for kids, and defied expectations. And I thought to myself ‘Hey, if Tony Stark can build a circuit board at such a young age, then maybe I can find a way that doesn’t mean I have to give up on one of the things I love.’ So, I guess I used the clay to symbolize what was expected, and your final design to show how you rose above.”

That shy little smile again. He wanted...

“In fact, you have done nothing but risen, Mr.- Tony. You have been a great inspiration for me, over the years. Quite possibly even a bit of a muse, if you will.”

Tony was a bit stumped, honestly. He had never been lost for words before. Thankfully he caught himself quickly. 

He wanted...

“So, philanthropist, billionaire, genius, muse.” (Had he just replaced his usual playboy title with ‘muse’?) “I like that.” (He did.) 

Peter.

“As your muse, I get dibs, right?”

A confused little head tilt. 

Cute.

“Dibs?”

On you.

“On the art pieces.” Tony elaborated with a sweeping gesture of his arm. “They are up for sale, right?

“Oh, yes. It’s uhm... we will hold an auction in a bit, after I have officially introduced myself to everyone here and said a few words.” Peter looked distinctly uncomfortable with that bit.

Tony was just opening his mouth to say something else, when suddenly Pepper inserted herself back into the conversation. (He had admittedly forgotten that she was there.)

“Peter, I think the woman over there is trying to get your attention.”

They turned to see a middle aged woman in an elegant dress, subtly gesturing to him. Peter grinned a bit ruefully as he turned back to his two companions.

“That’s my aunt, and also kind of my manager. I guess it’s time for my big entrance.”

He offered his hand once more first to Pepper, then to Tony.

“Pepper, Tony, again, it was a pleasure meeting you. Since it’s an auction, I can’t exactly grant you dibs, as much as I would like to.” He grinned at Tony. “But about 75% of all our revenues tonight will be donated to The Future Hope Foundation, which is a research center focused on developing cures for different diseases, speacially in children. I will be talking a bit more about that one in my speech, provided my severely repressed stage fright doesn’t hit me in a few minutes. So just know that whatever you decide bidding on, it will be worth it.”

Tony wanted to keep holding on to that hand. A hand that was just as calloused as his own, but still somehow softer and more delicate.

“I’m sure it will be.”

You will be worth it.

Just as Peter turned to leave, he cast one last look at the Play Dough model.

“Take a look at the note beside the general description before things start going, would you?”

Then he and his aunt vanished out of the room, to prepare for Peter’s introduction.

Curious now, Tony and Pepper turned back around to the pedestal and found what Peter had been talking about.

‘Of all my works, this one is my favourite, not only because of what it represents to me, personally, but also because of the person who inspired it. Unlike many of the other pieces, that are named after that which they represent, for this one, no other title than

Indomitable

could have ever come to mind. This is the only piece in the show case that will not be part of the auction. As this one already belongs to Anthony Edward Stark.’

“Pep.”

“Yes, Tony.”

“If I win every single auction bid, which I will, I would be entitled to a date with the artist, right?”

“You are probably still going to have to ask him the old fashioned way.”

“Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you all for coming tonight. Without further ado, it’s my sincere pleasure to introduce you to the man whose art work has brought you all here.”

Tony smiled. “I can do that.”

“I proudly present to you, Peter Parker!”

_________________________________________________________

The End.

Thanks to everyone for reading and liking the story! I hope you all enjoyed it, even though the story ends before Tony and Peter’s relationship really begins.

Thanks to the original prompt giver as well, due to the research I did for this story, I was able to see quite a few amazing art works.

Tagging: @unicornpower5301 -->why isn’t this stupid tag working?

[gdelgiproducer]

What’s been your favorite staged version of JCS? (Non-concert)

First, a list of the staged (non-concert) versions of JCS I’ve seen: two high school productions (about which you’ll hear nothing in this post; it’s unfair to judge them in competition with pros), the closing performance of the 2000 Broadway revival, two performances of the national tour that followed said revival (one of which featured Carl Anderson as Judas and Barry Dennen – Pilate on the original album, Broadway, and in the 1973 film – as Herod), and four performances of a national tour initially billed as Ted Neeley’s “farewell” engagement in the role of Jesus. In total, discounting the number of performances of each, five productions, only three of which we will consider here.

The 2000 Broadway revival had basically all the problems of the video of the same production: I’m sure Gale Edwards is a fine director of other shows, but she missed the boat with this particular iteration of JCS. (Not having seen her original production at the Lyceum Theatre in 1996, which unfortunately never left that venue and was reportedly far better than the one that went wide, I can only comment on this version.) Her direction and the production design that accompanied it were full of the kinds of blatant, offensively obvious attempts at symbolism and subtlety that appeal only to pseudo-intellectual theater kids. In real life, there’s no such thing as obvious good vs. obvious evil (things just ain’t black and white, people), and any attempt to portray this concept on stage or in a film usually results in a hokey “comic book” product, which is kind of what the 2000 production was. 

The first thing Edwards did was draw her line in the sand. “These are the good guys, and these are the bad guys.” The overall production design played into this ‘line in the sand’ feel as well, being so plain in its intentions as to almost beat you over the head with them. There may have been some good concepts mixed in, but for a show that runs on moral ambiguity, they were very poorly executed and did damage to the piece. Some examples:

Annas and Caiaphas were devoutly “evil,” seemingly designed to inspire fear.  It’s easy to see good as so very good, and bad as so very bad; to want to have the evil in a nice little box. But it’s not that simple. As Captain Jean-Luc Picard (and now you know where my Star Trek loyalties lie, curse you!) once said, “…villains who twirl their mustaches are easy to spot. Those that clothe themselves in good deeds are well camouflaged.”  Evil isn’t always a clear and recognizable stereotype. Evil could be lurking inside anyone, maybe even in you, and you would never know. People aren’t inherently evil. Like good, it’s a role they grow and live into. And since history is basically a story of the developments and actions of humans over the ages, maybe it’s a mistake to view the characters who’ve played their parts in it so one-dimensionally. It doesn’t dismiss the evil they did, but it does allow one to understand that this potential to be good or to be evil is in everyone, and that it’s not always as simple as just doing the right thing.

Judas was an almost thoroughly unlikable prick (though Tony Vincent played him a tiny bit more sympathetically than Jerome Pradon in the video); in beating Jesus over the head with his cynicism and curt remarks, any sense of a fully three dimensional person was lost, leaving us with a total, utter dickhead. If the audience is to truly feel for Judas, and appreciate his fall, it’s imperative for them to see his positive relationship with Jesus. More importantly, it has to be readily apparent. It shouldn’t be the audience’s responsibility to assume as much. I never once saw any love, or even a hint of friendship, between Jesus and Judas in the 2000 production. Judas’ interactions with Jesus were a constant barrage of either completely in-your-face aggression, or more restrained (but still fully palpable) aggression. No hint of a conflict in him, or at least none the audience could see, and what use is a conflict or emotion if the audience isn’t privy to it?

And when not telegraphing an ultra-specific view of the story’s events, everything else about the design would’ve left a first-time viewer befogged. Young me liked the industrial, post-apocalyptic, pseudo-Gotham City atmosphere of the set. Older me still likes it (though I am firm in my opinion it works best on stage), but realizes what a mess the rest of it was. We’ve got Jesus and the apostles straight out of Rent, Roman guards that looked (with the choice of riot gear) like an army of Darth Vader clones with nightsticks substituting for light sabers, priests that practically stepped off the screen from The Matrix, a Pilate in generic neo-Nazi regalia, a Herod with showgirls and chorus boys that seemed to have visited from a flash-and-trash third-rate Vegas spectacular, a Temple full of ethnic stereotypes and a mish-mosh of dime-store criminals, and a creepy mob with a striking resemblance to The Addams Family that only popped up in the show’s darker moments. Lots of interesting ideas which might work (operative word being “might”) decently in productions of their own, all tossed in to spice up a rather bland soup. The solution to having a bunch of conflicting ideas is not to throw all of them at the wall at once; you look for a pattern to present itself, and follow it. If no pattern emerges from the ideas you have, it’s a sign you should start over.

You can see what my basic issue was: where other productions at least explored motivation, examining possibilities and presenting conflicting viewpoints for consideration, the 2000 production (when not utterly confused in its storytelling thanks to conflicting design) blatantly stated what it thought the motivation was without any room for interpretation – this is who they are, what they did, why they did it, so switch off your brain and accept what we put in front of you. Which, to me, is the total opposite of what JCS is about; it didn’t get famous for espousing that view, but for going totally against the grain of that.

The national tour at least had Carl and Barry to recommend for it the first time around, but for all the mistakes it corrected about the 2000 revival (swapping out the shady market in the Temple for a scene where stockbrokers worshiped the almighty dollar, with an electronic ticker broadcasting then-topical references to Enron, ImClone, and Viagra, among others, was a fun twist, and, for me, Barry Dennen gave the definitive performance of Herod), it introduced some confusing new ones as well:

For one, Carl – and, later, his replacement, Lawrence Clayton – looked twice the age of the other actors onstage. Granted, Christ was only 33 when this happened, but next to both Carl and Clayton, Eric Kunze (I thankfully never caught his predecessor) looked almost like a teenager. When Ted and Carl did the show in the Nineties and both were in their fifties, they were past the correct ages for their characters, but it worked – in addition to their being terrific performers and friends in real life whose chemistry was reflected onstage – because they were around the same age, so it wasn’t so glaring. Without that dynamic, the way Jesus and Judas looked together just seemed weird, and it didn’t help anyone accept their relationship.

Speaking of looking weird together, the performer playing Caiaphas – who was bald, and so unfortunately resembled a member of the Blue Man Group thanks to the color of lighting frequently focused on the priests – was enormously big and tall, while the actor in the role of Annas was extremely short. Basically, Big Guy, Little Guy in action. Every time I saw them onstage, I had to stifle the urge to laugh out loud. I’ve written a great deal about how Caiaphas and Annas are not (supposed to be) the show’s villains, but that’s still not the reaction I should have to them.

The relentlessness of pace was ridiculous. It was so fast that the show, which started at 1:40 PM, was down by 3:30 PM – and that included a 20-minute intermission. What time does that leave for any moments to be taken at all? A scene barely even ended before the next began. At the end of the Temple scene, Jesus threw all the lepers out, rolled over, and there was Mary singing the “Everything’s Alright” reprise already. How about a second to breathe for Mary to get there? Nope. How about giving Judas and Jesus two seconds’ break in the betrayal scene at Gethsemane? The guards were already grabbing Christ the minute he was kissed. I was so absolutely exhausted towards the end of the show that I was tempted to holler at the stage to please slow down for a minute. The pace didn’t allow for any moment in the show to be completed, if it was ever begun; it was just too fast to really take advantage of subtle touches and moments the actors could’ve had, and as a result, I think they were unable to build even a general emotional connection, because one certainly didn’t come across.

The cast was uniformly talented singing-wise, with excellent ranges and very accomplished voices. (In fact, the second time around, the woman understudying Mary, Darlesia Cearcy, walked away with the whole show in my opinion, and I am incredibly glad to have seen her career take off since then.) But, in addition to some being more concerned with singing the notes on the page just because they were there than imbuing them with emotion and motivation, the cast was undercut by the choices that production made with the music. For one, there’s a huge difference between singing “words and notes” and singing “lyrics and phrases.” When you have a phrase like “Ah, gentlemen, you know why we are here / We’ve not much time, and quite a problem here…” you sing the sentence, and if sometimes a word needs to be spoken, you do that. You don’t make sure you hit every single note by treating each like a “money note” (which you hit and hold as long as you can to make sure everyone hears it), dragging out the tempo to hang on to each note as long as you can. Generally, the actors were so busy making sure every note was sung – and worse, sung like a money note – that they missed the point of singing a phrase, and how to use one to their advantage. Caiaphas and Pilate were particularly egregious offenders. (I’ve never understood some of these conductors who are so concerned that every note written has to be sung. The result suffers from it.) 

And then there’s Ted’s production. Of the three, it’s the one I liked the most, but that’s not saying much when it was better by default. 

The production design was stripped-down, the set basically limited to a bridge, some steps, a stage deck with some levels, and a couple of drops (and a noose) that were “flown in.” The costumes were simple, the sound was very well-balanced, and the lighting was the icing on the cake. Combined, the story they told was clear.

The music sounded very full, considering the pit consisted of a five-piece band relying in part on orchestral samples.

Ted, for being of advanced age, was in terrific form vocally, if his acting fell back a little much on huge, obvious, emotive gestures and choices. (I love him and all, but his attempts at acting were kind of like a “Mr. Jesus” pageant, striking all the appropriate Renaissance poses. The film, through editing and close-ups, allows him a subtlety he just ain’t got onstage.)

And there were some beautiful stage pictures; for example, there was a drop with an image of a coin with Caesar’s head on it in the Temple scene, and it fell on the crowd when Jesus cleared out the riff-raff. In the leper sequence that followed, the chorus’ heads popped out of holes in the cloth, under which they undulated, pulsing to the beat, and rather than being treated as a literal mob scene, the sequence had a very dream-like effect, a mass of lost souls reaching out to Christ. It was rather like a Blake painting, with a creepy vibe in a different manner from the typical “physically overwhelm him” approach. He didn’t interact with them, didn’t even turn to look at them, until finally he whipped around with a banishing thrust of his arm, hollering “Heal yourselves!” Sometimes it was over-acted with annoying character voices (remember, I saw this four times), but when it wasn’t, the effect was chilling.

My main beef with the show was, oddly enough, on a similar line to my beef with Gale Edwards’ production: it drew lines in the sand. But in this case, it drew them with respect to Jesus’ divinity. 

As written, JCS deals with Jesus as if he were only a man, and not the Son of God. The show never suggests that Jesus isn’t divine, but neither does it reinforce the view that he is. Portrayed in detail in JCS is the mostly-unexplored human side: ecstasy and depression, trial and error, success and regret. He agonizes over his fate, is often unsure of his divinity, and rails at God. Not so in this production. Aside from “The Temple” and “Gethsemane,” there was never any room for doubt that Jesus was the mystical, magic man portrayed in the Gospels.

At the top of the show, after a fight between his followers and the Romans during the overture (a popular staging choice I’m not a real fan of, but you’ve got to do something during that moment in a fully staged version, and I understand why it’s an easy choice to make for exposition purposes), Jesus made his majestic entrance, spotlit in robes that looked whiter than Clorox bleach could produce, and raised a man from the dead. Well, where’s the room for Judas to doubt? Clearly “this talk of God is true,” we just saw it! If this guy is actually capable of performing miracles, and more than that specializes in necromancy, good luck telling him that fame has gone to his head at the expense of the message and he’s losing sight of the consequences! Try explaining to anyone that that person is “just a man”!

If that weren’t enough, Jesus went on to have a constant connection with God throughout the show, speaking to a spotlight that focused only on him and often served to distract him from anything else happening onstage, and at the end, during “John 19:41,” his body separated from the cross, which fell back into the stage, and he ascended to heaven. 

Now, though the former was admittedly played to excess (some reviewers unkindly compared Neeley to a homeless man with Bluetooth), there are arguments to be made in favor of both of these choices: a Jesus who constantly seeks a connection with God that isn’t reciprocated, searching for guidance or at least a friggin’ clue, is great foreshadowing for his eruption – and acceptance – in “Gethsemane.” As for the ascension, depending on how it’s staged, there’s room for argument that it could be interpreted more metaphorically than literally, as the moment when Jesus’ spirit is born, as Carl Anderson once put it (meaning, to me, that his message is given life and strength when his body fails him). But this production didn’t have that level of shading and layers to it, and coupled with the resurrection at the start, it defeated the rest of the story.

None of ‘em’s perfect, and I don’t think I could create the perfect one. Thus, concert.

[sparkswift]

My Lover analysis

Disclaimer: some of these ideas were found on tumblr and all opinions are mine only. <3 Also hopfully this is coherent enough :) Overall: Lover is in every way about love. It sounds like new love, like being in love, being scared to love, being scared to lose it, and being secure in it. @taylorswift is looking at the world through rose-colored glasses and singing with the same storytellings, and symbolism we have come to know and love. This album shows a woman who found a love that is real and chose to step into the daylight and let everything else go.

Lover Analysis By Krishna C

I Forgot That You Existed: This song is the perfect way to start this "next chapter." This song is an upbeat bop! Taylor uses smart and witty lyrics like "it isn't love; it isn't hate; it's just indifference." This song closes the book on the persona from reputation and opens to the literal next chapter of her life. We stan.

Cruel Summer: This track was written with Jack Anttinof and St. Vincent, and you can hear both of them in this. The music is very indicative of summer. This is the first mention of the color blue, the relevance of which will be discussed further in later tracks. The growl when she sings "He looks up grinning like a devil" is * chef's kiss* perfect.

Lover: Listening to this song again after hearing the rest of the album it becomes obvious why it was chosen as the title track. This song is what I imagine it sounds like to be completely and unconditionally in love, in a way that it seems like a part 2 to "Call It What You Want." To me, this song sounds like sitting in front of a fire with the person you love, wrapped up in a blanket while a record player plays in the background. It sounds like dancing in front of that fire with your lover wearing a sheet as a wedding dress. The anxiety from songs like "Out of The Woods" disappears.

The Man: I will never shut up about this song. Taylor addresses sexism head-on through the lens of her own life. It is imperative to note this song is not Taylor saying she wishes she were a man. Taylor explores the idea that if she were a man and lived her life, in the same way, she wouldn't be scrutinized and criticized like she is now as a woman; she would be praised for it. I walk with 113% more confidence when listening to this song. Highly recommend.

The Archer: The lyrics on this album are some of her strongest yet, and this song solidifies that. The song, which has a backing that sounds like an arrow being shot through the air, is simple enough that the lyrics are the main focus and quiet enough that you can hear the fear and doubt in her voice. The invisible smoke is indicative of having fears that stop your breathing, but that no one else sees. Also, the line that references all of her heroes dying all alone is a slight nod to "The Lucky One" (2012). The initial fear subsides at the end, where she declares that she is ready to fight for her love even if it kills her. The song ends with a numb sound that is not unlike the sound a bow and arrow make when the arrow is finally shot.

I Think He Knows: This song builds seamlessly. You can hear the initial fear in telling the other person how you feel but then realizing that you don't have to say anything because they already know and feel the same way. As the song builds confidence in the feelings do too.

Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince: This song is haunting and sounds like being chased down an empty school hallway. A lot to unpack here, since she has spoken about it. Taylor has spoken of the political undertones of this song and the metaphor of a school football game as a form of patriotism. She has said this song came out of the feeling of everything falling apart in her life and with the country in 2016. In that year, she says, she became more critical of blind patriotism like the practice of Friday Night Lights. The symbolism of the football game and school be seen through many of the lyrics, notably "waving homecoming queens" and "I saw the scoreboard" and the cheerleader chants in the background. She also alludes to "Blank Space" (2014) in a lyric where she says she is "running through rose thorns" (see "Rose garden filled with thorns"). There is, of course, also a reference or two to the color blue in this song, but we can unpack that later on. In this song, she is also going with the idea of her being "an American queen," as we saw her in reputation (2017). Taylor has said this song is about finding someone who is able to escape all of the noise and run away with you until the chaos subsides. This song radiates Lana del Rey vibes but in a way that it is still completely a Taylor Swift song.

Paper Rings: This song is very recorded player 1950s but also very punk rock. It sounds like she is singing into an old microphone, and the effect is fantastic. It is upbeat and her way of saying 'I'd marry you in a heartbeat and I don't need money or fancy things (the fancy things could be a nod to "King of My Heart") to do it.' Again she mentions the color blue in regards to painting her lover's brother's wall blue. The significance of blue can be seen in the reputation magazine pictures of Taylor painting said wall and also in the lyric from "Dancing With Our Hands Tied" (2017) in which she says she was "deep blue, but you painted me golden" (golden sparkles are seen in another picture being painted over the blue wall).

Cornelia Street:  This is, by far, my favorite song. Taylor really returns to her storytellings roots with this song, something she has done beautifully since 2006. It tells the story of a love all in reference to the sacred street on which their love story was born. Taylor tells the story of a fight where she left the street and was headed for "the tunnel" (likely Lincoln tunnel), but then he stopped playing games and told her how he felt about her, so she turned around and then they made new memories on the street together. Their love almost ended, but then flourished on Cornelia street (Cornelia is also a flower that can be seen in the background of many of her recent performances as yet another easter egg). In the song, she is telling the story of their love and saying that if the story ever ended, she could never walk that street again because now she associates it with him and their love. You can hear the sadness when she says she could never walk Cornelia Street again towards the end of the song where she takes a breath. THIS IS NOT A SONG IT IS A STORY. TAYLOR HAS HER REAL LIFE LOVE STORY.

Death By A Thousand Cuts: This song does, in fact, cut a bitch up. It is a sad bop in which the instruments in the backing sound like mini jabs or a chandelier that is flickering. Taylor has said this song was inspired by the movie Something Great (2019) and the idea that sometimes a relationship ends not because you want it to or because you fell out of love but because you grew apart and then couldn't continue together. She "boards up the windows," an allusion to "Call It What You Want," of this love even when the lights in the house are still flickering and the love is still there. Its a breakup song for when you wake up at night being happy for the time you had with someone but sad that it had to end, because it hurts like a thousand cuts that will never heal, to end something that isn't and may never be over.

London Boy: This is a quick mood change. In this song, Taylor again makes a slight reference to patriotism. She samples audio from her co-stars from the upcoming cinematic adaptation of Cats (2019), James Cordon and Idris Elba. This song is so cleary about her boyfriend who is, obviously, from London. She says she can love where she is but her heart lies in London with her boyfriend. This song also makes reference to his accent which is a slight nod to "Gorgeous" (2017) in which she made fun of his accent. She also name-drops, designer Stella McCartney, which as we all know led to their clothing collaboration.

Soon You'll Get Better: In this song the Dixie Chicks easter egg from the ME! Music video finally hatches with a collaboration. This song is a vulnerable glimpse into Taylor's mother's battle with cancer. It sounds like a cold, empty hospital hallway that gets filled with love when certain people enter it, but it also sounds hopeless. Taylor lists a number of things she has done in an attempt to make this part of her life happier, none of which have worked. Nothing could work unless her mother gets better because her mother means everything to her and has moved mountains for her. Now Taylor is doing what she can to move the mountains for her mom. The depth of her hopelessness is exemplified in the line where she confesses that she prays now because "desperate people find faith." Taylor herself was raised Catholic but has seemed to grow away from that, but now she needs that faith because it means some sort of hope is out there.  

False God: The sounds from the horns really make this song. It also somehow reminds me of Halsey's music in that it feels very mysterious, and almost like you are listening to a hallucination. "False God" clearly draws yet another connection to religion, which is something she has also done in past albums with songs such as "Don't Blame Me" (2017). Again she makes reference to New York City, a city which she fell in love with when she moved there around 2014 and wrote: "Welcome to New York" (2014). In this song, she compares herself to the city, perhaps in the way that Taylor and her love are like the city in that they are "ever-changing" (2014). To me, this song sounds like sounds like driving down a dark road with a cross attached to the rearview mirror and your hand in your lover's hand as you drive without knowing what will come next on the road. This metaphorical car is being driven by "blind faith" because the two people are so in love, they will continue to move forward together ready for whatever is to come. It's what could have happened if the guy from "All You Had To Do Was Stay" (2014) had, in fact, stayed on the road with her instead of running them off of it. In this song, her significant other is not worried about what's going on with things that are outside of their control, and they continue together because they have faith in their love.

You Need To Calm Down: This upbeat bop feels like an extension of "Shake It Off" (2014), but this time it is more inclusive and with political undertones that voice support for the LGBTQA+ community especially (see music video as well). In this song, Taylor addresses the different types of hate that various groups of people (in various communities) may face in their lives and encourages people to "calm down" and not waste their breath with hateful words and useless comparisons.

Afterglow: Yet again, this song contains a reference to the color blue, which her significant other once revealed in an interview is his favorite color. Blue is significant in that it represents him, and she seems to have associated the color with him. In the past, Taylor has used colors to represent emotions (see "Red" 2012), and blue is usually associated with sadness and loneliness. This song is her taking ownership of having caused a fight, but telling him not to leave because of the fight. Taylor is asking her lover to meet her at the happy ending to come after the light, which takes place in an "Afterglow." This song seems to be yet another nod to religion in speaking about a glow that is not unlike that associated with heaven. There is a possible reference to "...Ready For It" (2017) in a lyric about an island (recall the lyric referring to "island breeze"). The bigger symbol in this song is light, which Taylor has been known to use in past albums to show different emotions. The lyric "burned it down" is not only her taking ownership of the fight, but is another use of symbolism and imagery of a fire (seen in other songs such as "Begin Again" 2012 and "Call It What You Want" 2017). This song could be connected to the idea that she wants this fire (in this case is the fight) to burn out, and when a fire is burnt out it, the embers still glow, as she hopes their love will still glow when this fight has ended.

ME!: A self-love anthem this song celebrates individuality and embodies the bright aesthetic of this album. It also makes her feelings about herself and her lover clear, especially after the dark persona she created for reputation (2017). In the music video for this song, she walks out of the invisible smoke that was present in "The Archer." This song screams: 'Yeah I might have insecurities, but I'm an individual, and you are too, and we can love each other for who we are.' A very feel-good song.

It's Nice To Have A Friend: In my opinion, this is the weaker song on the album, but still not a song that I would ever skip. Also important to note that the backing vocals of this song are a school choir from Toronto and all of the profits from the song go to them (found this info on tumblr). This song sounds like drawing on the sidewalk with chalk. It is from a school kid's perspective, to represent the child in both people in the relationship. At first and at the beginning of the song there are games, and the signs about how the two people feel about one another are not clear (see lyrics involving sidewalk and snow, note and video game). Then it becomes clear that they both want to be together, and they start to bring out the child in one another. They are more than lovers they are best friends, and all other doubts from earlier have melted away, like the snow on the sidewalks.

Daylight: The perfect end to this album of love where Taylor's easter egg from her Elle article hatches as she encourages us all to "step into the daylight and let it go." Taylor herself had to let go after the darker days that resulted in reputation (2017) in order to find the light in her life again (she has said this in an interview). Her last album felt more like a night album, but Lover and the bright and light aesthetic that comes along with it makes it very much a day album. She references the smoke from "The Archer" saying that she "in clearing the air" she "breathed in the smoke." This song sounds like fresh air in a glowy bed of flowers. Taylor is moving on to brighter and happier things, and this song is the perfect way to show it. Along with this light, is the fact that Taylor once believed love was simple like black and white but in this song we see that now she sees love "in screaming color" ("Out of The Woods"). The color that screams love in this song is gold (see lyrics), as stated before there is a picture of Taylor painting her boyfriend's brother's wall blue in the reputation magazine, the picture that follows shows Taylor painting a patch of gold paint over the blue (see "Dancing With Our Hands Tied" lyrics). The color gold is often associated with magic, light, and happiness and it is clear that this is the purpose of the color in the song as well (see lyrics "golden like daylight"). She also compares herself to her beloved New York City yet again, this time it is in reference to sneaking around the city like she was sneaking around in "Delicate" when the relationship was new. Taylor acknowledges that she has made mistakes, but now it's time to step into the daylight and keep walking and it can be assumed that she intends to walk hand and hand with her lover. The audio at the end of the song sounds like a voicemail you would listen to if you want to remember someone fondly. It sounds like a faded memory with colors that are still vivid and bright. It sounds like hope. The album ends with the word love, and that says it all.

[kathrynmaslow]

Love Lies 5/15

Summary: Ever since Emma was 13, she knew she had the ability to destroy people if she wanted to, and some days, she really wanted to. After being forced to go to Greenwood Academy following a traumatizing event in her childhood that brought to the surface her ability to manipulate fire, she never thought she would be free of the place. So for nearly 10 years, she lived a solitary existence with the exception of her best friends, but that was all about to change.

Killian Jones had just been sentenced to attend the university campus at Greenwood Academy after an accident at sea caused him to be dishonorably discharged from Her Majesty’s royal Navy and lose his hand. He doesn’t know what to think about these newfound powers and what they spell for the rest of his now not-so-normal life. But a chance encounter one day has the ability to change all of that.

A story about love and redemption between two people that shows, if you have the right person beside you, you can find a light in the darkness.

Rating: M Content Warnings: Mentions of Violence/Death, Brief mention of Childhood Abuse/Sexual Assault, Mild Sexual Content Chapter Notes: Chapter 5 is here folks! This is actually one of my favorite chapters in this entire work so I am excited for you to read it as well!

Check out the amazing art work that my artist @princesse-swan did for both chapter 3 on tumblr. Thanks again as always to my beta @daveyjacobsthepotterhead for taking this work and helping me turn it into something great. You are the literal best.

Read on FF

Catch up on Tumblr: One  Two  Three  Four

Art by @princesse-swan here

Chapter 5 Emma sat down on the edge of the wall surrounding the plant beds at the entrance to campus from the dorms. Unwrapping her grilled cheese and tomato sandwich, she looked out at the rows of dorm buildings lining the main walk onto the academic campus.

The sidewalks were abandoned, with nary a soul on campus to be found. Many of the students went home during the fall break about halfway through the term, and Emma took advantage of some time just to herself that she didn’t have to spend in her room.

While she enjoyed time with her friends while they were on campus, she did enjoy having the campus pretty much to herself during the breaks where everyone who wasn’t high risk got to go home. If she remembered correctly, after Elsa moved into a community in Alaska last summer, there were about 17 other students that had a full run of the campus to themselves.

Losing Elsa as a friend had been hard. She had arrived at the academy after Emma had, and could have been considered her polar opposite in every way. While Emma burned hot, Elsa burned cold, with extensive gifts of ice and snow, she proved quite the challenge for the staff to contain, considering that she could freeze off her suppression gear and not be affected by them at all. She was someone that Emma could relate to, someone who could understand the beast that prowled beneath her skin, and losing that confidant last semester had been something that she truly hadn’t fully bounced back from yet.

Taking a bite out of her sandwich, Emma just sat and watched the leaves fall from the trees.

o.O.o

Killian didn’t know what to think about how quiet the campus had become once fall break had begun.

Yes, he had been told that all the students who weren’t high risk students would be allowed to visit home for the two weeks that classes were on break, but he hadn’t realized how truly empty the campus would feel.

He spent the first two days of the break wandering around campus to see who was around.

A few of the administration members were lingering around with the multitude of security officers watching the campus, but he had only run into a handful of other students.

There was one gentleman named Eric, who had the power to create storms out of thin air. He was a perfectly nice guy, but after living 6 years of his life on a boat, he decided not to trust anyone who could sink a ship on a whim.

Another woman named Cruella had the ability to control people with her voice. How they regulated that power, Killian couldn’t fathom, but it was probably for the best.

On the third day, it seemed as though he was in luck.

While wandering through the abandoned floors of the library, he stumbled upon Emma bent over another drawing book sketching.

Thankfully she didn’t have any headphones over her ears this time, so he didn’t have any chance of ruining her artwork, but he still made the effort to make a bit of noise against the door as he walked in.

Emma looked up at him in shock.

“Killian, what are you doing here?” She asked.

“Wandering through the library, but I don’t suppose that is what you meant by the question.” He stated. He had never mentioned to her that he was a high risk student before and Killian had to imagine that this was a bit of a shock.

“I am so sorry, that completely came out wrong. However, that was what I had meant by the poorly phrased question.” Emma said, tucking her hair behind her ear as she flushed in what Killian presumed was embarrassment.

“It’s fine Swan, truly. I know you didn’t mean anything horrible by the remark.”

“I am a bit curious though, what kind of powers do you have that make you a high risk student?” Emma said, pushing her notebook to the side and leaning towards him.

He caught a glance at the notebook as it turned towards him slightly, and he grasped at the chance to change the subject. He didn’t even like thinking about his powers, so he really didn’t want to talk about them with someone else.

“Emma, this is amazing.”

It was, truly. Drawn out on the page was the image of a woman, long black hair hanging over her shoulders, one bloody hand clutching a dagger to her chest and the other grasping a heart. There was no color to the design yet, but she had shaded in where the blood was likely soaked into the woman’s hair and dress. The entire thing was hauntingly beautiful.

“I know an attempt to distract me when I hear it.” Emma said.

“I wasn’t trying to distract you, I genuinely like your art.” He retorted.

“I also am pretty good at knowing when someone is lying to me. And while you do like peeking at my sketches, you were lying that this wasn’t a distraction.” Emma said, looking adorably smug when she said it.

He couldn’t help but smile in response. “Fine,” Killian said, rolling his eyes. “Maybe I was trying to get you off my tale, but I would prefer not to talk about this. It’s not something I am truly comfortable with and, while I do enjoy your company and think of you fondly like a friend, I don’t think this is something I can tell you about.”

Emma stared at him for a long moment before nodding her head.

“I can accept that, there are things about myself, and events that have happened to me that I don’t talk about to anyone else. I can understand needing time to process things that are traumatic before being able to open up to someone else.” She said.

“Since we aren’t talking about anything related to our powers or our past,” She said, pausing to look up at him meaningly. “Why don’t you tell me something that I probably wouldn’t know about you.” She said.

When Emma was smiling at him like that, He couldn’t deny her anything.

“I actually am a bit artistic myself. I do the occasional doodle.” Killian said.

Emma’s eyebrows rose in surprise. “Really, I wasn’t expecting that.”

“There are a lot of things about me that you wouldn’t expect Swan.” He said, relishing the flush that spread across her face in response to his quirked eyebrow and tongue in cheek.

“Alright Killian, let’s see what you can do.” She said, pulling blank sheets from her book for the both of them and handing him a pencil.

“What do you want me to draw for you Love?” He asked, taking the pencil from her and working to move the paper into the position he wanted it in with his other wrist.

“Whatever inspires you right now.” She said.

He looked up into her bright green eyes and knew exactly what he wanted to draw.

“How long are you going to give me?” Killian asked.

“Let’s say, finish in an hour. Whatever you can finish by that point in time is what you’ve got.” Emma said.

“Challenge Accepted.” He said, turning to his work and beginning his attempt at replicating perfection.

o.O.o

Emma and Killian were spending the afternoon out in the courtyard between the college campus and the lower campus when they heard it.

Killian stopped mid-sentence in his retelling of how his brother got stuck by the back of his shorts in a tree when they were younger and cocked his head.

“Swan, does that sound like crying to you?” He asked.

Emma listened harder, facing further towards the lower campus where Killian was pointing towards. Sure enough, it did sound like someone was crying.

She stood, gesturing for Killian to follow, heading towards the lower campus.

Normally, students on the college campus were not allowed to venture onto the lower campus, but since it was a school break, students were allowed to roam the grounds as they pleased.

They walked past the first handful of buildings before they could finally locate the sound.

Curled into a ball between two of the buildings and crying into his hands was a boy with a mop of brown hair.

The young boy could have been no more than 12, which was incredibly young for someone to come to the academy.

But then again, Emma had arrived around that age as well.

Emma flashed back to one of her first days on the campus, reeling from being separated from her family and forced to move halfway across the country to a place she didn’t know and getting surrounded by people she was unfamiliar with.

She had also spent a few nights crying from the loss. The loss of her brother, the loss of her mother, the loss of the only home she had known.

The loss of her normal life.

She turned to see Killian watching her with a speculative gaze. She only shook her head at him.

Turning back to the little boy, she walked slowly towards him, since he still hadn’t noticed them standing there.

“Hey, are you okay?” She asked, crouching down in front of him.

The boy visibly started, looking up at her in surprise.

“What? Who are you?” He asked.

“My name is Emma, and this is Killian,” She said, gesturing behind her at Killian, who was still standing back from them at a good distance.

She noted that his blunt wrist was tucked behind his back.

“Are you okay?” She asked again.

The boy sniffled, nodding his head in agreement even though a few fat tears still escaped his eyes to fall down his cheeks.

“What’s your name?”

“Henry,” He said, sticking his hand out in greeting.

“Well Henry, it is a pleasure to meet you. When did you start your stay here?” Emma asked. He didn’t seem the type to be a new high risk student since he didn’t have any suppression items on that she could see, but you never know.

“My mom dropped me off this morning.” Henry said, sniffing loudly again, his lower lip quivering.

“Well, it sounds like you could use a friend, would you like to hang out with me and my friend for the rest of the day?” Emma asked.

Nodding his head, he stood up and fell into her extended arms.

He shook a little with quiet cries, and Emma rubbed his back in a soothing manner.

Killian came around in front of her, and placed his hand on the back of Henry’s shoulders and rubbed slow circles as well.

“You know Henry, I remember my first night that I spent away from all my family.” Killian said.

Henry pulled away from her slightly, turning to look at Killian.

“Really, I thought it was the most terrifying thing that could ever happen to me at the time.” Killian admitted. “Would you like to hear about it?”

“Is it a scary story?” Henry asked, standing fully away from Emma.

“Not really, it only seemed like it at the time. Why don’t you come for a walk with Emma and I, we had a lunch sitting out in the courtyard.” Killian stood, extending his gloved hand for Henry to take.

Emma smiled, watching Killian lead Henry towards their impromptu picnic sight, weaving an exaggerated story of a 20 year old man sleeping away from home for the first time, and crying himself to sleep.

Killian winked over his shoulder at her once he got Henry laughing at his story.

With that wink, Emma felt something she was pretty sure would grow into love start blooming under her breast.

o.O.o

Killian was walking around campus outside.

It was pretty close to the time he went to bed, but it was fixing to storm out, lightning streaking across the sky and thunder rolling in across the campus, and it made him restless.

The barrier surrounding the campus kept out all supposed threats against their safety, but unfortunately, couldn't prevent the rain from falling on them.

His thoughts were occupied with thoughts of Henry, that young lad they had found on campus earlier.

Emma had told Killian that he was a bit of an anomaly when he mentioned that his gifts had only just manifested at 25 years, but he didn’t know they could start showing that early.

The young lad hand only just turned 12 a few weeks ago, a fact the young lad had divulged to them while they were splitting ham and cheese sandwiches and cheetos in the middle of campus during the day.

He had something relatively minor as a gift, something that doesn’t require him to stay on campus during school breaks like him and Emma have to.

When they revealed that fact to the lad, it seemed to turn his entire spirit around, from sniffeling and sad to bright and chipper.

Almost a bit too bright, considering the lad started glowing on them.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he was pretty spooked when he heard a voice off to his left.

“Killian?”

He whirled around, and found Emma sitting on a low wall surrounding a garden in the yard.

“Emma, what are you doing out here?” he asked, tucking his hand into his pocket as he made his way over to her.

“I could ask you the same thing.” She said, watching as he came over and sat down next to her.

“Couldn’t sleep, decided to go for a bit of a walk.” He said, shrugging his shoulders a bit.

“Me neither.” Emma said, pulling one of her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around it, resting her chin on her knee.

“Yeah, but I couldn’t sleep because of the storms, I don’t think that was the case for you. What’s vexing you love?”

Emma turned to look at him, but once she noticed him looking at her, she turned her face away.

A flash of lightning across the sky lit up her face for a split second, and Killian could have sworn he saw tear tracks tracing down her cheeks.

It wasn’t until after the rumble of thunder rolled over campus a couple of seconds later that she began to talk.

“I started at the academy here when I was 13, not much older than Henry is. I guess seeing him today brought back some memories of when I first arrived here.”

“I can’t even imagine what that would have been like.” He said, when it became obvious that she wasn’t going to continue. It was so unlike her to open up about anything to him when it came to how she started at the academy, so he was going to have to take it as it came.

“It was lonely.” She said, still not looking at him.

Killian watched a few more bolts of lightning flash across the sky, the air becoming damp and oppressive as the storm continued its advance towards them.

Neither one of them made any move to leave and avoid getting poured on, but Killian wasn’t inclined to leave her alone.

He never could leave her like this.

“I lost everything. Henry gets to keep his family, he gets to go back to his mom, see his dad, and play with his brothers and sister. I got none of that.” She looked over to him, her eyes rimmed in red, and something in Killian’s chest tightened.

She had obviously been out here a while before he had happened upon her.

“My mother disowned me, my father was already long gone, and I haven’t seen my older brother, my best friend and partner in crime, in person in almost ten years. I didn’t get to see him get married and I didn’t get to see the birth of my niece. And it’s not fair.”

Something in her voice cracked when she said “fair”, and Killian wanted desperately to pull her into his arms and give her a hug, but she was so closed off that he didn’t think it would be well received.

At that moment, the heavens decided to open up and the rain came pouring down on the two of them.

Killian looked up at the sky, the rain hitting his face with wet plops that made water run into his eyes and he blinked rapidly to clear them.

Turning to look at Emma, he felt the rain continue to soak into his hair and shirt, and he wondered absently if it would ruin the mechanics in his glove getting them this wet.

Getting a good look at Emma for a second, he had to choke back on a laugh.

“What?” She said, hearing his choked off laugh and turning to face him after looking up at the storm clouds above them as well.

“Sorry, I don’t mean to laugh, truly love. But you’re steaming.” Indeed, little wiffs of steam were rising from where the rain was splattering down onto her bare skin.

He pressed his lips together in an effort to keep himself under some measure of control.

But it seemed to be in vain as a large smile broke out on her face, wiping away the lingering sadness in her expression from their conversation.

“Did I never mention that I may run a bit warmer than a normal person?” She said, chuckling a bit as she asked him.

“No, but that might be a useful thing, considering that I am now soaking wet and cold.” Killian laughed.

“Oh no you don’t, that is entirely your own fault.” Emma said, moving away as he leaned towards her, but it wasn’t in fear of him. No, she could tell he was playing with her.

“Come here and warm me up Emma!” He said, lunging after her.

She leapt off of the wall with stunning speed, darting across the yard in a blur of damp blond hair trailing behind her.

And as he chased her around, moving after her and sliding around in the mud enough to cause them both to burst into further hysterics, something warm bloomed up in his chest.

It felt like the first ray of sunshine after a storm, and he wanted to hold onto that feeling as long as he could.

Wrapping his arms around her from behind as they both went sliding through another patch of mud, Killian pulled her close as he tried to keep them both upright.

They were both laughing as he turned her around to look at him, her arms coming around him in turn.

Something in her expression changed, some of the laughter and lightness transitioning into something curious.

His eyebrows pinched together, getting ready to ask her what she was thinking about when Emma pushed up on her toes and pressed her lips to his.

It was like that first ray of sun, and when the seas are calm and the sky is blue, and that first bite of fresh summer fruit after a long, cold and dark winter.

Her lips were soft against his, and he pressed back, tightening his arms around her and forming his lips more firmly with hers.

They broke apart with a start when a peel of thunder began right above them.

She gave him a tentative smile, and took his hand. “Come on sailor, let’s get you out of the rain.”

o.O.o

The rain had fried some of the electronics in his glove, and he couldn’t move his fingers the next day, but he wouldn’t have changed that night for anything.

[mysterioustransmissions]

My favorite comics of 2017

Keeping with my new tradition of posting this list super late, here, on the last day of 2018, is my best comics of 2017 list. I can offer excuses -- my wife and I remodeled our house and welcomed our first child into the world this year, and I’m also unfailingly lazy -- but 2017 was also a killer year for comics, making this a bit larger of an undertaking than usual. Both Koyama Press and co-publishers Retrofit Comics and Big Planet Comics had absolutely stacked lineups. You’ll see them listed as publisher for many entries below.

I always struggle with how to order this list. I got serious about organizing my comics collection in 2018, and am running into the same problem. There, I’m thinking of dividing it into two -- a single-author section organized by author name (which ends up being mostly minicomics and graphic novels), and a multiple-author section organized by title (which ends up being mostly traditional-sized comics). Here, I’m essentially doing that same thing, but mixing them together; some entries are by title, and some author name.

Comics I especially enjoyed are marked with an *.

Allison, Matthew; Cankor: Calamity of Challenge #2 and #3 (self-published).

Berserker 1, edited by edited by Tom Oldham and Jamie Sutcliffe (Breakdown Press). There was a lot of anticipation and very specific expectations placed on this book ahead of its release, but no one seemed to walk away from the finished product satisfied. But it’s got a killer cover, great production design, and strips by some of the best cartoonists going. I hope Breakdown does another one.

* Booth, Tara; How to be Alive (Retrofit Comics & Big Planet Comics). One of the funniest books I’ve ever read. Booth’s drawings are a riot to look at, that the gags are also great is pure gravy. About as big as crossover hits get in my house. (I.e., my wife also loved it.)

Cardini, William; Tales From the Hyperverse (Retrofit Comics and Big Planet Comics). Cardini’s sci-fi world is made bigger and more engaging by the rapid-fire pace of this short story collection. His wild experimentation with color is always an inspiration.

Corben, Richard; Shadows on the Grave #1 - #8 (Dark Horse Comics). Not my favorite of Corben’s late-period Dark Horse horror books, but there’s plenty to enjoy. I was stunned by the sheer efficiency of the storytelling -- there are entire stories told with a single image and a few word balloons. A lot of these books sport great covers, issue #1 here, seen at the link for this entry, is one of the best.

Darrow, Geoff; The Shaolin Cowboy: Who’ll Stop the Reign? #1 - #4 with Dave Stewart (Dark Horse Comics). I was so bowled over by the experience of buying Shemp Buffet monthly that I initially scoffed at Cowboy’s return to more traditional narrative, but it turned out to be no less wild and no loss at all.

Davis, Eleanor; Libby’s Dad (Retrofit Comics & Big Planet Comics) and You & a Bike & a Road (Koyama Press). You & a Bike & a Road does something that’s often attempted and rarely successful -- it beats the audience down so it can then lift them up higher. Its success is due in no small part from its origin as a real-life journal. The visceral and emotional pain Davis feels on her journey is sincerely felt, and the lack of cynicism the storytelling choices are made with allow the reader to feel it whole cloth. And listen; it certainly doesn’t hurt that Davis is an amazing narrative storyteller besides -- Libby’s Dad is no less affecting.

DeForge, Michael; mini kuš! #43 'Meat Locker' (kuš!). I sleep on DeForge. I take him for granted. I feel like I’m not the only one? I see some excitement when his books come out, but no discussion. Blame it on the high volume and opaque nature of his work, the dearth of comics reviewers, and me, obviously. Also obviously, whenever something of his does find its way to my hands, I’m never sorry.

Estrada, Inés; Alienation #3 - #6 (self-published). The bundled version of this series, seen at the link for this entry, has the coolest book packaging I’ve ever seen in my life.

Expansion by Matt Sheean and Malachi Ward (AdHouse Books). I didn’t like this nearly as much as this same team’s previous Ancestor (due no doubt to its earlier and improvised creation), but damn, what a cover.

* Forsman, Chuck; Slasher #1 - #4 (Floating World Comics). I’d say the majority of my interest in Forsman’s work is in seeing how he presents his it and steers his career -- he’s among the best there is at that. Slasher is his first work I strongly connected with. It digs deep and gets wilder and wilder.

Ferrick, Margot; Yours (2dcloud). I’m a simpleton, so I was surprised at how deeply I was able to be moved by something this abstract. As always, grabbing 2dcloud’s whole line on Kickstarter expands my horizons and makes me a better reader.

Foster-Dimino, Sophia; Sex Fantasy (Koyama Press). I’ve actually only read the minis of this. This collection has the one I’m missing, plus some new material, but I love Sex Fantasy. It’s like a perpetual motion machine for thought -- you can just think about it forever.

Fricas, Katie; Art Fan (self-published). One of those things you dream of happening at a show -- picked this up at MICE not knowing anything about it, and was delighted by the artwork and knocked out by the “reviews of trippy art events”; particularly the first, about Duke Riley’s Fly by Night.

* Friebert, Noel; WEIRD6 (self-published), SPINE: I’ll Still Watch (Bred Press), Old Ground (Koyama Press). Sometimes when I have a fever, I can’t break loose of a single, circular thought -- I have the same thought over and over, only to realize once the fever’s broken that it was barely coherent. Friebert’s newer, decompressed work is like that. You turn page after page, and nothing happens. It’s the same characters still doing and saying the same things, again and again. You turn the pages faster and faster, almost in a panic, hoping to break the cycle and resolve the unease before you. But it’s no use.

* gg; I’m Not Here (Koyama Press), Valley (kuš!). I’m Not Here is one of a few books I recommended to people who were enjoying season 3 of Twin Peaks at the time. It doesn’t convey information so much as emotion, and rewards as much thought as you want to put into it.

* Hankiewicz, John; Education (Fantagraphics Books). I loved this so much I only read a few pages a night to make it last. Michael DeForge once called Noel Freibert an “astronaut” -- that applies to Hankiewicz also. No one’s ever done anything like this before, and if we didn’t have Hankiewicz I don’t think anyone ever would. Bringing poetry and modern dance (!!) into the language of comics, this was another book I recommended to watchers of season 3 of Twin Peaks -- you don’t understand the story by connecting facts, you understand it by connecting emotions.

* Hanselmann, Simon; Portrait, XMP-165 (self-published). XMP-165 was the first big payoff of the longform nature of Megg and Mogg, and it destroyed me. Also released this year was Doujinshi, Cold Cube Press’ gorgeous re-release of a Japanese Megg and Mogg fan comic.

Harkam, Sammy; Crickets #6 (The Commonwealth Comics Company). People talk about how good this book is, and I agree, but I’m not sure I could tell you why.

Haven, Eric; Vague Tales (Fantagraphics Books).

Hernandez, Gilbert and Jaime ; Love & Rockets Vol. IV #2, #3 (Fantagraphics). I made the terrible error after Love Bunglers to trade wait Locas, and for whatever reason they haven’t released one since. So I was way behind when this started coming out, but I bought and read it anyway. I initially found the story to be light, but I eventually realized I had a free ComiXology trial and caught up. It’s as great as ever.

Ito, Junji; Dissolving Classroom (Vertical, Inc.), Shiver: Junji Ito Selected Stories, and Tomie: Complete Deluxe Edition (Viz Media). Tomie may have come out in 2016 actually? I describe it to people as being about a beautiful woman who stands around until some total lech of a man inevitably murders her, then she comes back and annihilates him in the most unpleasant manner possible. Repeat ad infinitum. I don’t think the text 100% supports my reading, but that’s what it means to me.

Landry, Tyler; Shit and Piss (Retrofit Comics). The ephemeral, disjointed nature the single issue format served this story better, but it’s still extremely rad.

Loup, Celine; The Man Who Came Down the Attic Stairs (self-published).

Marcus, Ben; Crisis Zone 3rd Edition (Bred Press).

Mignolaverse and John Arcudi; Dead Inside #3 by Arcudi, Toni Fejzula, and Andre May, Lobster Johnson: The Pirate’s Ghost #1 - #3 by Arcudi and Tonci Zonjic, Hellboy: Into the Silent Sea by Gary Gianni, Mike Mignola, and Dave Stewart (Dark Horse Comics). Ignoring a few years in college when I was a lapsed comics reader, I’ve bought every Mignolaverse comic since I was about 13. That loyalty has slowly eroded over the last half decade about. I’m not alone in thinking the Arcudi-Davis run is one of the greatest of all time, and that the books started to go downhill after Guy Davis left. Beyond the departure of Davis, there are a few reasons for that, in my view.

First was the decision soon after to expand the line’s offerings. Doubling the line’s output and bringing in (inevitably) inferior creative teams was a no-win proposition for readers. Who wants more of something not as good?

Second, I think that Arcudi, a great writer, has shifted his focus from tightly-plotted five issue arcs to series-spanning character arcs. While I’m guessing this reads great in big chunks, it doesn’t spread out month to month, some months out of the year. I’m looking forward to a big re-read of everything after B.P.R.D. wraps in a few months, to see if this theory holds. Lobster Johnson: The Pirate’s Ghost came close to standing on its own, but was still rife with moments that I can only assume were big character payoffs because I didn’t remember enough to know. (Especially cool covers by Zonjic on these issues.) However, the non-Mignolaverse title Dead Inside offered the type of visceral, plot-based payoff his B.P.R.D. run with Davis hooked me with. I hadn’t been this thrilled by an Arcudi book since Killing Ground.

But third, and worst of all, has been the addition of writer Chris Roberson, whose books read like updates to the Mignolaverse Wiki. (The Visitor: How and Why He Stayed was okay, but pretty much solely due to Paul Grist’s fun art and layouts.)

I’m staying aboard the main B.P.R.D. book as it races to the finish line, and will continue to buy anything Arcudi writes, which seems to be mostly these Lobster Johnson comics. (Although even that’s looking increasingly, and sadly, unlikely to continue: https://twitter.com/ArcudiJohn/status/1075086925436874753) And I’ll certainly buy any more of these very sporadically-released Hellboy OGNs, like Into the Silent Sea, they decide to release -- the only real non-Mignola drawn Hellboy books anymore.

* Milburn, Lane; CORRIDORS (self-published). Sits comfortably next to Inflated Head Zone by Zach Hazard Vaupen, one of my favorite comics. They both forsake straightforward narrative in favor of theme-driven emotional impressionism, and do it with horror. This is catnip to me, and something I aspire to (although I’m far too boring to achieve it).

* Mirror Mirror II, edited by Sean T. Collins and Julia Gfrörer (2dcloud).

Now: The New Comics Anthology #1, edited by Eric Reynolds (Fantagraphics Books).

* Providence #12 by Jacen Burrows, Juan Rodriguez, and Alan Moore (Avatar Press). It came out months after, but it’s a safe bet Moore wrote this before Trump got elected, right? A more accurate depiction of the shell-shock of being thrust into a post-facts world I haven’t seen.

Roberts, Keiler; Sunburning (Koyama Press). Another big crossover hit in my house.

* Shiga, Jason; Demon Volumes 2, 3, and 4 (First Second). Demon became a book I wouldn’t stop showing to anyone who would listen. Like Gina Wynbrandt’s Someone Please Have Sex With Me, its hook transcends the normal comics reading audience -- you can show it to anyone and they get it right away. Specifically I would show people this amazing video https://youtu.be/NRxCTeM5pyU, which would clue them into what Shiga does enough to get them to read Demon. Demon has a story, but it’s more about rules -- establishing them and playfully subverting them with a level of inventiveness that regularly leaves you in awe.

* Terrell, Jake; Extended Play (2dcloud). This delightful book took me completely by surprise, an experience made possible by 2dcloud’s subscription model.

Tomasso, Rich; She Wolf: Black Baptism #1 - #4, Spy Seal: The Corten-Steel Phoenix #1 - #4 (Image Comics). The end of this second series of She Wolf approached the same hostile disregard for what came before as the end of Tomasso’s previous series, Dark Corridor. But where Dark Corridor acted on that impulse by simply burning it all down, She Wolf has enough respect at least to replace what came before by pivoting into a completely different comic. The freedom this affords the plot to dart in unpredictable directions is exhilarating. And it’s fun and beautifully laid out and designed, as always with Tomasso.

Tran, Thu; Dust Pam (Peow). Gorgeous!

Vaupen, Zach Hazard; Combed Clap of Thunder (Retrofit Comics and Big Planet Comics).

* Willumsen, Connor; Anti-Gone (Koyama Press). The part where the protagonists drive their boat past a window with a dog in it rewired my comics-making brain forever. This was another comic I only read a few pages of a night to make it last longer, and also recommended to friends of mine who were enjoying season three of Twin Peaks -- the plot is obfuscated in a similar way.

Yanow, Sophie; What is a Glacier? (Retrofit Comics and Big Planet Comics).

Yokoyama, Yuichi; Iceland (Retrofit Comics). Another comic I recommended to Twin Peaks season three fans. Similar to the residents of the Red Room, the characters seem truly of another world, their motivations and actions incomprehensible to us.

[revchainsaw]

Raya and the Last Dragon (2021)

Wow! I can't believe I'm about to review a mainstream Disney release of all things on this blog. Eh! I make the rules and this thing is close enough to a high fantasy/martial arts film and who knows I may give a crack at Disney's Cruella later if the film strikes me the right way.

The Message

Set in the fictional land of Kumandra, Raya exists in a world where dragon lore is at the center of everything. Kumandra is a prosperous land that exists around a dragon shaped sea, and the different Kumandran tribes that live there are named after the part of the dragon they inhabit. Fang, Tail, etc, etc. It's no wonder that the Dragons are so revered in these cultures, as the prosperity that the world is now experiencing is due to the great sacrifice where the dragons gave their lives to create a magic jewel that keeps a horrible race of sprits called the Druun at bay.

The jewel is protected by the Heart tribe, particularly the lineage of the Heart chieftain. Raya is the heir to this immense responsibility. Her father the current guardian of the jewel is an idealistic sort and believes that the Kumandran people can be united, however the other tribes have their own interests and biases, even about the Heart people who they believe are using the power of the jewel to unfairly benefit themselves. Raya is an apt disciple of her fathers ideals but unfortunately this leads to her falling for a ploy by the people of Fang to steal the Jewel, when she 'befreinds' the Fang Princess Namaari.

A battle ensues over the jewel that ends up shattering the macguffin of power, and releasing the Druun back into Kumandra. The Druun now unleashed upon the world begin to create a ruin. Transfroming anyone they come into contact with into stone. Raya's father saves her before being petrified himself.

As we fast forward Raya has become a cynical adult bent on finding the last dragon of legend in hopes that she can defeat the Druun, and return the world to the way it was, abandoning her hopes that the Kumandran tribes can ever be united. It should come as no suprise then that Raya does in fact discover the Last Dragon, Sisu. Sisu is a fun loving, comedic, and hyper energetic creatuer with a love for humanity and trusting nature that is at odds with Raya's trauma and cynicism, it also doesn't help that her special power is "swimming".

As they journey across the Dragon shaped land of Kumandra, they gain friends and face foes. Raya holding onto her hurt and refusing to trust the other peoples they meet enough to think that maybe Sisu is a Sacred being who is important to their cultures as well. It is this lack of trust that eventually leads to tragedy for Raya.

At this point I'm going to uncharacteristically avoid spoilers. Raya is left with the fall out of her distrust and must either turn to her survivor nature and endure this world the way it is, or put her trust in those that have wronged her and bravely and boldly take a leap of faithful expectation that a better world is possible. It's a Disney movie, so I'm sure you know where this goes, but I'm not going to give you the specifics. It's pretty sweet and powerful.

The Benediction

Best Creature Design: Tuk Tuk: Available at Target

I can't lie. I work on the road and I have to use the bathroom all over town if I need to. My secret for finding the cleanest place to go is to generally avoid gas stations and rest areas when I can help it and to hit up grocery stores and book stores etc. as often as possible. My favorite is a local target, the bathrooms are generally less in demand than a gas station, much cleaner, AND at target they usually have a starbucks so I can also grab some joe. All that said, I have seen these absolutely massive Tuk Tuk toys in the toy section and I'm going to buy them for all the kids that I know. I just think he's a fun creature. Im not a big enough fan of Raya to justify having this basketball sized toy in my collection, but I think that kids will love having a giant armadillo bear monster to pal around with.

Best Character: Dragon's Heart

Sisu is an endearing figure and her offbeat but kind nature reminds me exactly of my favorite kind of people to meet in the wild. It's hard to be a lover and not a fighter. It's hard to be so understanding. It is an archetype that we see all over any media with a semi-spiritual message and I don't think we've seen it with quite the comedic edge as Sisu. Aang from Avatar comes close, but his light hearted attitude is certainly on par with Sisu, his comedic sensibilities are decidedly less "on". It also kind of says something that I forget that I'm talking about a dragon here.

Worst Aspect: Rayatar the Last Water Dragon

Alright, this might be a hot take but. Avatar: The Last Air Bender did it better. I can't call it parallel thinking as Raya came out almost a decade after Avatar. The two are playing off of very basic heroes journey style narratives that have existed in human story telling for longer than either show so it's completely unfair to claim that Raya was "ripping off" Avatar, BUT it's also a bit naïve to think that Disney wasn't banking on familiarity to move some product. Disney usually goes after public domain properties and fairy tales we are all vaguely familiar with and that's no accident. There's a clear pattern that people gravitate toward the familiar, it's why franchises won't just die. It's why they can repackage all their animated films into mediocre live action form and sell you the exact same movie over and over again. Even if the plot of Raya didn't have similarities to Avatar, which it does, the marketing certainly was attempting to banking on the beloved animated series.

When Raya was first coming out i saw a lot of people claiming that the fashions and character designs were copying Avatar and guys, that's kind of racist. Both shows are creating fantasy worlds with heavy influences from East and South Asian cultures. There's going to be some things that to a white American eye look pretty homogenous, although I'm sure with a little education are in fact very distinct. So as far as the "look", my only gripe is with the Logo.

Now, all that said. If you do want a show where an American animation company created a lore heavy fantasy world that draws heavy inspiration from Asian history and folklore, where a group of special spiritual individuals were wiped out but one remains and is the only hope of uniting a world populated by nations of people with very basic easy to remember names like "fire, and fang, and heart, and earth", where the chosen one is a goofy pacifist who uses the power of love and spiritual values to pull an impossible victory out of their butt at the last minute, but it still makes you cry and want to be a better person, then I have good news for you. You're spoiled for choice, I'm not gonna say Raya "copied" Avatar, BUT ... Avatar did do that particular story better. It may be a bit unfair, as Avatar had three seasons to do so and Raya had like an hour and a half.

Best Weapon: Shifty Sword

I just like Ranma's sword. I'm gonna use this category when I see an extra cool weapon. Oh man! When I review Flying Guillotine am I really going to have to talk about how bad ass the flying gullotine is?

Rayas weapons is actually not a sword at all but is called the Jade Dragon Keris. A Keris is an asymetrical indonesian dagger, and no it doesn't turn into a whip like in the movie, but it is cool that hers does that. The animators really do some creative things with that.

Summary

Raya is unfortunately shaping up to be one of Disney's forgettable features. I think that's a shame as it's stronger in my opinion than many of the recent films that have come out. But as is the case when Disney does a lot of it's more 'action/adventure' films, audiences seem to largely ignore them. Here's to you Treasure Planet. The good news is those movies do have the most passionate and interesting fans. The appeal is more focused than it is broad, and that's okay. As pointed out above, don't expect Raya to give you anything new, but if this is your kind of story then I'm sure you'll be happy to add it to your collection. There's room enough for lots of these.

Overall Grade: C

[twistednuns]

January 2021

Creating art is about growing the world and increasing its reach, and it has more to do with the act of creation itself than what is actually made. Anything that animates us creatively in a positive way — be it the grand design of a great architectural wonder or the Big Bang of a child’s drawing — is a re-enactment of the original creation story. Whether we realise it or not, making art is a religious encounter as it is our attempts to grow beyond ourselves that energise the soul of the universe. (Nick Cave on shitty art)

Seeing the old library guy having dinner table with his wife. They even lit a candle. How celebratory.                                                                       

Writing a birthday message for Frank about my new beginnings and first days of the year.

Making my nails look as if I had dipped my fingertips into a jar of silver glitter.

How black and glossy blueberries suddenly become after being coated in my warm coconut porridge.

Shinto does not strictly divide the world between material and spiritual, nor between this world and an alternative perfect realm, but instead emphasises that intuitive spirituality facilitates the fusion and equilibrium of all realm. - Why Haruki Murakami is so very Japanese

Sporting a hickey on my neck like a basic 16-year-old.

Going new paths (on my daily walk).

Feeling really grateful for the habits I established last year. A daily walk, taking helpful supplements, flossing, hair and face masks before every shower. Cold showers! A reasonable bedtime. I'm incredibly excited about forming new habits this year! The first ones to tackle are meditation, strength training and a daily creativity practice.

Suddenly imagining the taste of strawberry sauce. Anticipating the first spaghetti ice-cream of the year.

Loving kindness meditation (!) and smiling meditation. Spotify's Wake Up/Wind Down podcast is really quite good, too.

Cracking the impossibly hard to reach spot in my back by twisting and stretching my right leg (who knew).

The first tulips of the year on my nightstand. I chose a dark yellow, almost ochre.

Sparkling water with passion fruit juice. All I could think of during the last minutes of a long and cold walk. Getting undressed. Stretching. Meditation.

Vivid dreams of diving. How I miss being underwater. At least I got to do it in the nightly virtual reality show, eh?

Walking in a winter wonderland. I hate snow but I do admit it's quite pretty when the whole forest is covered in white.

A friendly nod from the delivery guy with the amazing curls.

Running into the neighbourhood's wild cat. Giving him a good scratch.

My new salt crystal lamp. I love its warm light.

The random house on a street nearby with the word nest next to its doorbell. Is that really the family's name? Or just what they call their house? (I would totally get that as nest is one of my favourite words)

Kalimba covers. With cat. Wholesome.

Sinking my face into a pair of warm tracksuit pants which had been drying on the heater. The warmth and the fresh laundry smell were so nice.

Plucking icicles.

The fact that the sidewalks aren't quite as icy and slippery anymore (I hate having no proper grip when I'm walking).

A gorgeous animal atlas with really pretty drawings in one of the boxes with free stuff people often put out these days.

Sarah Wilson. I could hardly put her new book down and immediately started reading her book about anxiety when I was finished. In a way I feel really connected to her. What an inspiring woman! Another thing I love is how she structures her books. She merely numbers her paragraphs, some only a few lines long, some a few pages.

The taste of strawberries. It's hard to describe but somehow it lights up my brain? Can I say that?

Osteopathy. I don't know what she does or how she does it but Laura has magic hands. My body feels completely healed after a session with her.

Simply walking everywhere. I get my steps in and don't have to deal with annoying public transport or my shitty bike.

Peeking out of my shell: looking at people I came across on an early walk and saying good morning.

Little yellowhammer birds on my balcony. I've never seen them before around here. And the tiniest bird on one of my walks through the forest. Perhaps a wren?

Dreaming of India. Visiting a local family, inquiring about a "somatic reading" (whatever that is) but deciding that it was too expensive and watching them prepare food instead. Talking to the grandmother. Riding to their restaurant on the market in a little wagon together.

Lying in bed after taking a shower, bathing in sunlight.

Dorky donkey confetti paper tissues.

A very soothing video of a cat purring loudly got me through a lousy Thursday. I kept coming back to it every couple of hours and it actually helped.

I'm currently watching Chilling Adventures of Sabrina on Netflix. It was a bit hard to get into it at first because it's SO different from the series with Melissa Joan Hart I used to watch as a teenager but ever since that cheerleading scene where Sabrina and Ros perform to RUN DMC's It's Tricky I'm absolutely sold.

The other day there was a lady just standing at the edge of a field, watching her dog run around in the snow, enjoying the sunset. A very peaceful image.

More tulips: red ones this time, a smaller variety. I loved watching them blossom.

Collecting ideas and yellow objects for a yellow-themed letter.

These baby blue and pink sunrises I have been seeing lately.

A new magic trick: summoning dogs by simply holding their gaze for a while.

I hate snow. I really do. But I love how bright the light suddenly is. I smile apologetically at people shovelling snow when I walk by. The other day I stood under a branch when a couple shook the tree and let the snow fall down. I would have been mad if it hadn't been for my umbrella.

When the first and last bits of light colour the tree tops in a warm, gold and orange colour during sunrise and sunset.

The smell of my armpits (have we all stopped using deodorant during lockdown and are suddenly able to smell our armpits or is it just me) made me remember kids carnival parties at our local sports club. We wore cheap costumes made from synthetic fabric and were all super sweaty from running around all day as princesses, vampires and cowboys on a sugar high.

Learning the reason why snow melts faster under trees.

Listening to the New York Times' The Daily podcast. More speficially the Sunday Read (which mostly seems to feature the topics I'm really interested in). There was the wonderfully whimsical episode about the Cloud Appreciation Society. I'd never realised that Joni Mitchell's song Both Sides Now is about seeing shapes in clouds ("pareidolia"): Rows and flows of angel hair / And ice cream castles in the air / And feather canyons every where / Looked at clouds that way. Then there was this other episode about Moonstruck, a movie starring Cher and Nicholas Cage. At the end they keep playing the film music for a while before the episode slowly fades out. I was walking down a snowy alley and felt like the heroine in a late 90's movie (which I could also describe as end-of-century now, how peculiar).

Pelvic floor training. I have more strength, I'm taller and it somehow keeps straightening my back? I'm really impressed of how effective it is and am planning on learning more about the Cantienica method.

I know I'm late to the game but last night I watched the whole first season of Emily in Paris in one go. I needed something to cheer my up and, oh my, did Emily deliver. Well, not really her, but Paris. Everything about the serious can only be described as delicious. The food, the man candy, the fashion, colours and backdrop. While watching I kept thinking about outfit planning, exotic cuisine, roadtrips, kissing strangers, enjoying the good life. Oh how much I miss it. I feel awfully trapped in my apartment these days. One last thing I need to highlight: Sylvie, played by Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu, who is the real star of this series for me. She is just SO chic.

More light! I actually stand a chance to get home before sunset now when I head out late-ish for one of my daily walks.

A good talk with Lena. Home-made ramen. Watching en episode of Planet Earth and Blue Planet each.

Sourdough pizza with goat cheese, honey and fresh truffle.

[admesser]

Hello everyone!

To kick off my new series of interviews with authors, artists, and creators, I want to introduce you to Seth Greenwood and Angela Zhang.  I have been following their work for a couple of years now, and find the story intriguing and the artwork incredible.

Seth Greenwood

Angela Zhang

1) Please discuss your creative background. Who are you, and how did you get involved with your art?

SG: I would love to tell you some quirky little story of how I got involved in writing comics. But I am afraid the answer is very simple. I was a dreamer, a poet, and a blogger when I traveled to South Korea to live for a year. One of my co-workers kept telling me about all of these ideas he wanted to make into comics. At that time I was 27 or so and I didn’t know the first thing about comics, and to be honest I had never even read my first comic book. I was always into reading novels and watching films. You might even say that I was disinterested but I believe I finally decided to do it because a friend needed my help and I felt I had the ability to make it happen. Stories are stories, right? So when I said yes, I jumped into research head first. I learned how to write, and format scripts. I started reading many comics from the past and present, and ultimately I started writing my first script for a P.A. piece called “Covenant”.

AZ:  While I didn’t realize it back then, I was making wordless comics on the back of my mom’s PhD thesis drafts since I was 7 years old. When I grew up,  I thought academia and teaching were the only viable career paths for artists. So I ended up going to art school and then completed a master’s in Art History. I realized that reading theory and writing about art really wasn’t my thing. I ended up working in administration full time for a while. It was during this time that I discovered there are people who will pay you to draw if you were good enough. So I kept working on my art on the side. (I spent a whole year waking up at  5AM before work to practice drawing and I am NOT a morning person hahaha!) In 2014, I quit my job to pursue freelance illustration. It’s been hard, to say the least, but no doubt creatively rewarding. So far I’ve done storyboards, concept art, architecture illustration, product design, book covers and of course comics!

2) How did you two meet and collaborate on the Gale Project?

SG: Long story short? “Covenant” never happened. I decided to try my hand at screenwriting since I had such a bad first experience. I realized quickly that even with the best of friends, partnerships can be very difficult to maintain. One night I posted a snippet from one of my screenplays on a blog and tweeted the link. I never expected to get a reaction but that script reeled in one of my favorite artists to this day! Angela Zhang tweeted me and said that she liked my style and to contact her if I ever wanted to do a noir style comic. I didn’t know if this was an empty gesture, but I immediately replied that I knew just the story for us. The rest is history. Angela and I have known each other for a little over 3 years now and we have been moonlighting Gale ever since.

AZ: My big dream has been to make a long-running comic series. But I’m not a writer.  As an adult,  I really got into comics through the works of Craig Thompson (Blankets) and independent creators like Rich Barrett (Nathan Sorry), Lora Innes (The Dreamer) and Jason Brubaker (reMIND). The first comic that I posted online was a realistic, drama that focused on character acting, mood and atmosphere.  I didn’t think anyone else would be into this kind of story until I came across Seth’s writing online. He has a knack for natural dialogue and I can imagine his character’s emotions through their words. I honestly didn’t think anything would come out of our tweets. But it was his persistence and speed that convinced me, yes, this guy wants to make a comic as much as I do.

3) What is the inspiration for Gale?

SG: Oh wow! A lot! The idea of Gale, whether I knew it or not, first started to form in 10th grade when I wrote a free verse poem about a man at his father’s funeral who had obviously been murdered for some mysterious reason. The rest of the story comes from my experience with the world that I grew up in. The things I noticed that were beautiful on the outside were actually rotting on the inside. I started writing about those things you don’t introduce yourself with and immediately start talking about. Politics, civil rights, class consciousness, you name it. It’s all in Gale, in a quasi-dystopian alternate reality. I don’t intend to present my solution to these issues in Gale. In the end, it is a fictional story that will hopefully both entertain and inspire.

AZ: In terms of art, Seth and I met over Skype where he would describe his vision. Gale’s world is a mix of the old and new in American culture. The vehicles and architecture are based on 1940s design and they coexist with our everyday technology, like cell phones and laptops. When we visit Ned Norman’s mansion, there’s a touch of gothic horror. I researched Hollywood movies between the 1930s and 1950s. My library has a collection of classic films. I would rent Hitchcock and Dracula to see how directors in those days composed dramatic shots, knowing that the output would be in black and white.

4) Please describe the visualization process from script to screen. How do you imagine it as a writer, and how do you imagine it as an illustrator?

SG: Would it sound too unreal if a lot of what Angela does is almost exactly how I see it in my head. It’s almost as if she downloaded my brain onto a Wacom Tablet. But the process is much harder than that! It’s why I am the writer and she is the artist. Every once in a while she will suggest something and most of the time it makes it better or translates better to the comic medium. One thing that I had a problem doing at first, was getting out of the habit of writing scenes and getting into the habit of writing still panels. Angela did a wonderful job showing movement and expression.

AZ: I’m grateful that Seth trusts me and gives me a lot of creative freedom to put his words into comic form. We have  over 50 posts on our Patreon blog detailing the process from script to panel (collecting reference, thumbnailing, layout, word bubbles etc.) To be honest, these days I don’t even think about my process, because drawing Gale has become more intuitive for me. I think what lead to this magical understanding between Seth and I is that we’ve built a solid friendship. If you get to know Seth, you will see that he’s truly caring and generous. We chat almost every day. Seth sends me photos, writing and videos related to Gale and we talk about life too. The more that I think about it, our conversations allow me to have a better understanding of where Seth is coming from and deeper insight into the characters and the world of Gale.

5) Talk about the heart of Gale’s storyline. What challenges does it face?

SG: Angela may want to elaborate, but I believe this sums up the storyline.:

Gale is a drama, mystery and suspense story that draws inspiration from film noir. Rookie attorney Gale Norman is determined to seek out the truth behind his father’s mysterious death. As Gale’s suspicions grow, buried memories of his mother’s disappearance resurface and he refuses to hide from his dark past. With the help of his childhood friend, Laurie Gambill, Gale attempts to solve a seemingly ordinary mystery that may eventually lead him in a downward spiral. Will he uncover the truth to his parent’s demise or will he become further entangled in a web of lies?

As far as challenges? Well here recently my life has been unpredictable. Being a full-time soldier in the US Army and trying to write, update social media and maintain a valuable connection with our audience has been hard to say the very least. We have had to try to remain very flexible. I have had to re-dedicate myself over and over again. It’s something that plagues me but at the same time it is something I can’t and won’t leave.

AZ: Making the characters relatable is one of the challenges that Seth and I are always thinking about. At first, I had a hard time describing Gale to people because the story has many layers. Gale also comes from a wealthy upbringing which is pivotal to the story but  I can’t relate to it.  After I completed the scene where Gale kisses his childhood friend Laurie, I started relating to them in a real way. I thought about how the 20s is an interesting period to explore the loss of innocence. Unlike adolescence, the loss is more of intellectual awakening. In Gale’s case, it’s about dealing with death, discovering the truth about his past, getting friend-zoned by the only one he trusts and feeling alone in the world. As the series progresses, Gale gets caught up in more and more unbelievable situations. I think as long as we’re grounding the story in an emotional truth we’ll overcome the challenge of making the characters relatable.

6) What are some difficulties you have experienced with the project and how did you overcome them?

SG: I’m glad you said “some”! Let’s see here. The decision to publish Gale independently was not always considered. We did that when we realized the publisher would really not have much more to offer us and we wanted complete freedom for the project.

Angela had issues with me not being patient and almost jumping the gun a couple of times before we were ready. That is just me. I am a little too ambitious at times. She was always the voice of reason when it came to the business side of things. A lot of times she had to pull my head out of the clouds.

We have had to push back launch dates because of our day jobs and we have had to cancel convention appearances for the same thing. The way we overcome obstacles is to keep pressing on, remain flexible, and continue to create this wonderful story that’s brought so many people together. It’s persistence, more than anything, it is always persistence.

AZ: I think Seth and I have an interesting dynamic that I’ve come to appreciate. In the beginning, we had a bit of friction because we didn’t understand our working styles. I have to think things through from all sides, create a plan and put a process in place to execute. Seth, on the other hand, will act immediately when he gets an idea. I don’t think Gale would have the following it does today without Seth’s fearlessness, tenacity and enthusiasm to try new things. However, self-publishing a comic to our standards of quality has a lot of finer details that require time and planning. What I love about Seth is that he’s open to feedback, he’s always willing to improve and that inspires me to do the same.

On a personal side, I was very slow at drawing Gale pages in the beginning. It would take me a month to finish a page. Seth probably worried at some point whether I was cut out for this job and he’s been really flexible and patient with the project. Some people told me I should simplify my art for comics. But I pushed myself to keep going in the style I have for Gale and I reinvented my process along the way. I’ve learned that just because you have an ounce of talent, it doesn’t entitle you to anything except hard work. Now I can produce 3-4 pages a month alongside my full-time work.

7) Please discuss your creative process. Do you follow a schedule? Set deadlines? How do you get the creative juices flowing for your project?

SG: I am chaotic! Ask my wife. Despite my military experience, I can be somewhat all over the place. The reason why Angela is much more than the artist and she carries the title co-creator is because she keeps me on point. She keeps us on schedule. I write when I am inspired, I send notes to Angela and forget to save them in the shared file so she does it for me. If it was not for her I wouldn’t have come this far. No other artist would have taught me how to maintain good order in this line of work.  As for creative juices? I read books, watch some character driven NETFLIX shows, and study people and cultures. I love Sociology, Anthropology, and Psychology. One thing that is most important in this process, however,  is reading. To be a great writer, you have to be a reader first!

AZ: I actually have a militaristic approach when it comes to creativity. If you’ve ever read The War of Art by Steven Pressfield, you’ll get where I’m coming from. In the past, I’ve struggled with time management and it has a lot to do with fear and procrastination. I now manage and track my creative time through a pomodoro app. It’s basically an interval timer that alternates between a work and break period. When that whistle sounds for the work interval I’m not checking email or rummaging through social media. The app allows you to export an excel spreadsheet so you can see how long you spent on a task or project. I base my schedule and deadlines around the data and strive to be more efficient over time.

On the other end of the spectrum, I think it’s important for artists to recharge their creative juices to prevent burnout.  Although I’m rigid and structured during projects, I’m the complete opposite when it comes to downtime. I like going for aimless walks, cooking, watching movies, reading manga, and comics and playing video games with my fiancé (who by the way has been super supportive of Gale).

8) What is in store for Gale? When will it be released?

SG: I don’t want to steal Angela’s thunder. Most of this is her brilliance. I will let you take the reigns for this, co-creator!

AZ: As Seth mentioned, we’re going the self-publishing route and playing the long game of making a series one page at a time. Instead of releasing Gale when it’s all done, we’re inviting people to follow our journey of making comics by sharing the process, what we’ve learned through trial and error and how we’re constantly striving to improve. I think that’s more fulfilling for us creators to relate to readers every step of the way then just popping up one day and saying ‘hey here’s  our product, buy it.’

Last fall we completed Chapter 1: The Calm and launched it on Webtoon and we’re also currently posting it panel by panel on Instagram. We’re halfway through Chapter 2: Storm Chaser and aiming to finish it by the end of this year. Next year, we’re going to explore Kickstarter as well as comic book conventions.

9) Do you have anything you would like to add to the article?

AZ:  I want to thank anyone who took the time to read our interview. Although we’re small and at the beginning of our journey, I’m super grateful and touched by all the support that Gale has received.  I also want to give huge thanks to the Savannah Quill for having us and putting all of this together. I deeply appreciate this opportunity to share our thoughts and  process

SG: Same as Angela, thanks! Also, look out for Gale on Webtoon and make sure you stay tuned for a short we have contributed to Red Stylo Media’s newest upcoming anthology; a collaboration of artists and writers paying tribute to the band, Forence + The Machine entitled “Cosmic Love”. The Kickstarter for the main print run will launch sometime this Fall. Just look for the announcement on IG “Stories” or on Twitter!

www.thegalecomic.com

IG: www.instagram.com/thegalecomic/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/thegalecomic

Webtoon: http://tiny.cc/mnwrxy

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/galecomic

©2019 Adam Messer. All Rights Reserved.

Inside the minds of The Gale Comic creator and artist. #indie #author #comicbook #artist #adammesser #sethgreenwood #angelazhang #thegalecomic www.adammesser.net Hello everyone! To kick off my new series of interviews with authors, artists, and creators, I want to introduce you to Seth Greenwood and Angela Zhang. 

[pensurfing]

Caitlin’s Three Things List

Okay, so moments (probably hours by the time I finish this) ago I wrote a goals list that I think is good for self-evaluation. (Keyword: This is what I think. results may vary depending on what you’re looking for.)

I’m going to hop to it and answer some of these that I laid out in hopes of having a better idea of what I want to accomplish. 

The Three Things Lists!

1) Three things that went well this year.

* Audience growth

So once upon a time, I grew a pretty decent following due to creating an Inktober Prompt list. My expectations: Maybe two of my friends would do this, maybe. And then one stranger that has followed me for a while. (There are a few followers I recognize their username because if I post something they always like it and for some reason that keeps me going.)

But because of this prompt, I was exposed to MANY new creators and illustrators that I now enjoy chatting with and following! Instagram had the biggest maintained growth. I’m excited to create for an audience that actually expects me to create and not just for friends who see my things “whenever they aren’t busy”. (Not to bash them or anything, just there are a lot where unless I tell them, they don’t see the posts I make.)

Another surge of growth in my audience was due to tabling at conventions this year. I was terrified to show my work let alone attempt to sell it to someone. Tabling at cons not only boosted my confidence but also quieted one of my ever going demons. “YoU sUcK aT dRaWiNg CaItLiN.” “How do you have a degree? oh right, you just barely passed.” I can’t say this is the case, there is an audience that genuinely enjoys my scribbles. So I am forever thankful to Atlanta Comic Con for giving me that chance. It honestly opened a few doors for me.

**Process

I’ve gotten more comfortable with showing my process. It can be messy, crisp, and illogical. But turns out the people who enjoy my content enjoy my scrambled thoughts. It’s something about not being alone in this sort of sense that calms the nerves.

So I can say with chest poked out that sharing process has gotten MUCH better. I can thank a self-help book I bought this year that was a FANTASTIC BUY. Austin Kleon has [two] (currently? If he has more then I’m buying it like people buy a name brand.) books that helped me see that it is GREAT to share not only the process but advice. “Show Your Work” is the book I’m talking about for now. Great tips, the outline is on the back of the book. So if you’re like me, I need to clearly see what I might be getting into, you might have a ball.

And finally, (not calling myself out on this but other) If you’re going to respond to people when they ask you “how do you___?” do not answer “Google it”. That is the rudest thing I’ve seen some of even my FAVORITE illustrators do; that response can burn in hell. PERIODT. (my one typo allowed.)

*** Art Style Exploration

For those who think college will help you establish an art style that you’ll enjoy or help nourish the one you currently have.... Let me save you over 80K.... No, the fuck it won’t.

That was the biggest thought I had going into art school. If anything, it confused me more and utterly destroyed what little confidence I had in my drawing style. After graduating, I had a huge swing from how I used to draw to how my art currently looks. I stopped trying to please the one professor who stood between me and my degree and started drawing to please my tastes. And guess what? That did something. And that something WORKED. I love what I draw now; I see why I chose this as my career path. I’m genuinely happy with how my pieces turn out versus in college just wanting to turn the damn thing in and hoping it isn’t an F.

2) Three things you could have handled better.

* The loss of a good paying client.

Now hear me out when I say this: A good paying client DOES NOT EQUAL a good client. Say that three times and then exhale.

Back earlier this year, I had the opportunity to work with a writer who gave me hell and back. And even that is an understatement. I dealt with her because in school you were taught “if they pay on time, finish the work and get the exposure.” 

I’m here to tell you my lesson learned: A good paying client DOES NOT EQUAL good exposure, good pay, a good client. 

I was doing the work of three for the price of one and a half. (And was always told I charged too much.) She tried abusing this power with friends of mine, with other illustrators. When things turned out bad, she tried saying it was my fault. She read my contract and then tried telling me I changed the wording, I purposely did this thing, another thing was my fault. I could go on with this story.

The part that I wish I handled better?

How I treated myself afterward. I’m so used to people telling me, “Cait, this is what you do wrong. This is how you fix it.” that I don’t consider my own feelings, and when I bring my feelings into the scenario they no longer matter. Because they tell me they don’t matter. In this case, I wish I had treated me better, because my feelings, my mental health, DOES matter.

**My Patience Getting Into Conventions.

Pretty self-explanatory. I got into one, finished one, and wanted to do eight more in a week. But this sort of thing just takes time and I need to accept that.

***My losses

I had to listen to a Little Mix song to actually learn this one. The context of the song is nowhere near the topic at hand. But a verse from Power feat Stomzy really packs a punch after this year: 

“ You look him in the eye and say, "I know I'm not a guy But see there's power in my losses and there's power in my wins" “

I had to look one of my demons in the face, and state something similar. My loses mean I’m trying. My loses piling shows I’m not willing to give up easily, and that is something that took a while to be content with.

3) Three things artistically you want to improve on.

*Composition

It’s not awful, but it can be better.

**Color

I told this BOLDLY if I might add while critiquing someone else’s portfolio; “Your color palette is boring. All your [things] look as if they are from the same universe, during the same time of day, with the same kind of mood. After three photos it’s bland, boring, and understood you have a preference.” 

Can you say damn Cait? The statement was, in fact, true, but I certainly could not talk. My color palette is mainly bright, pop, and happy. In order to tell a story, I KNOW it is best told with color. And I failed myself this year. But I sure won’t next year.

***My Damn Tag

Okay, alright. Why is it well-established artists have their tag figured out? Even some who’s art style is so recognizable (I’m looking HEAVILY at you Gabriel Piccolo.) we know it’s theirs, seem to have a tag that suits them and works for them. But more importantly, they put it in A VERY DECENT SPOT. SOMEONE SHARE THIS SCIENCE WITH ME? CAUSE APPARENTLY I DON’T GET IT.

4) Three things you want to focus on trying.

*More backgrounds.

As much as it pains me, I need to improve on backgrounds and perspective. When I do make backgrounds, I’m told I make great pieces. That I should look into becoming a background artist. And don’t get me wrong, I like them. But I don’t like them.

I feel as though I need to improve in that region so that way I don’t feel as though it’s a weakness of mine. My backgrounds are nice, but they aren’t nice to my standards.

**More designs

I love character designs, but let’s be real. If you were to scroll down my site or my Instagram page, or even this Tumblr archive, could you tell? 

I draw characters a lot sure, but none are designs. No process, no sheets, no turnarounds, none of that. So that’s a huge goal of mine for 2019.

***Scheduling posting

At one point I was pretty good at this. Live stream in Instagram and Twitter, cool. Videos on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Cool. Everywhere gets a photo, everywhere gets a silly one-liner. Yay. I’m not leaving anything out.

Well by the end of this year that totally crumbled. 

SO I want to try getting better at that thing there. Because having attempted this at the end of the year was cool, but it still wasn’t enough apparently.

5) Three positive things to tell yourself.

* You are an inspiration. That’s all you wanted to be in life, you did it. I’m proud of you.

**You didn’t kill yourself like you tried to; you opened up about it for once and used that pint up anger creatively. That is very hard to do, trust. I’m proud of you.

***You moved on, matured, and let it go. Even when the goddess inside you told you these peasants didn’t deserve your light, your friendship, your greatness. I’m proud of you.

I’m just proud of me for not snapping when I had every right to; not everything deserves a reaction.

6) Three negative things you want to leave for 2018.

*Comparisons 

Oh boy. I am extremely guilty for this: I’ll compare myself to a well-known illustrator my age. I’ll compare myself to friends who are in the field having a blast and getting work; I’ll compare myself to friends who aren’t in the field and they struggle at getting work. I’ll compare myself to the kid I graduated high school with who is traveling the world, is able to eat, come home to his dog and relax because he doesn’t have tuition to pay. I’ll compare myself to these goddamn baby boomers who keep repeating “We didn’t have it hard, you’re just being stupid. Millennials aka our children deserve to starve. We’ll just put our faith in our grandchildren because screw the kids we raised and refuse to pay accordingly. $7 an hour worked in my day, they need to make it work now.” I’ll compare myself to fake people I created in my head and purposely made scenarios and wonder why I’m not like them, said creations I made because I was pretty low for ten minutes...

I just compare myself too much. To any damn body. It’s draining, obnoxious and most of all pointless. My new motto for next year is: “Unless it is helping you grow yourself, your brand, your spirituality, don’t do it.”

I’m not comparing my chapter two to someone’s chapter thirty-five. I’m not even comparing my chapter two to someone else’s chapter two. I need to stop doing that PERIOD! My journey is different, unique, and worth seeing through.

**Listening to negative others.

A couple of years ago, I lost a close friend around the time my aunt passed away. During this time I was hypersensitive to any and everything done or said; I also kept many walls up to hide my mourning. He caught the crossfire of all of that. I kept secrets from him I was too prideful of admitting and lashed out because of the emotional turmoil I kept suppressed. While in the midst of packing his things and leaving my life, he mentioned that I was a failure because I was unemployed and artistically speaking I hadn’t accomplished anything; that I would remain that way because that’s just the person I deserved to be. Now mind you, I graduated college that year; he was a flunk out. I changed my art style dramatically compared to when I started school to pass; he thought just posting crappy pictures of lukewarm sketches were equivalent. I started attempting trends and all he could do was copy. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t to bash my old friend. If he were to come back into my life and move on like nothing had happened I’d do the same. (With some limitations.)

It’s just while typing out this scenario, of our four-year friendship I can’t think of one nice thing/compliment/gesture he has said to me. That’s my problem.

I can be praised, admired, and look highly upon for years straight. But my problem is I let others negative thinking and comments marinate with me for a long while. Too long of a while.

Another example is my mother’s friend. (My mom has many friends that do this shit, but this one stung more.) 

This friend always roots for me; treats me like a person, and encourages my artistic journey. I consider her family before my actual relatives. 

We went over for some barbeque the family was having and I was ready. Black Hallmark Cookouts, laughing, good food, good music, shit talking others teams. She asked me a harmless question of when was I going to quit my day job. Seemed like nothing at first, until the added gest of what she continued with. “All I’m saying is you can’t do [your day job] forever. That will get old. If the art thing doesn’t work out next year what’s plan b?”

I’m not a calm person (usually). Normal Caitlin would have cursed her out and mentioned how just because she chose a job to settle and be miserable at for most of her life doesn’t mean I have to follow suit. But again, of all the nice encouraging things she has done, said, and showed, for a while, I couldn’t think of it. 

So I pray I let go of this nasty behavior in 2018; it’s going to be hard but it is dire.

***Saying I’m Not Enough

Alright, now put the combination of the two above in a bowl and what do you get? A Caitlin who struggles in interviews and applying for jobs because I let comparisons and negative comments rule my thoughts. This stopped me from applying to jobs I would have been perfect for; internships that could have helped me; posting art online.

We (including me) have to stop thinking that in order to be an illustrator means we have to pass a certain threshold of struggle, success, and a huge number of followers. That isn’t the job description. NO JOB DESCRIPTION has ”must have at least 10K followers on Instagram or Twitter.” nOnE. 

So we (including me) need to stop treating ourselves this way. Period.

7) Three things you’re looking forward to in 2019.

*Going to move conventions.

**Adding pieces to my portfolio to try again at job hunting.

***Becoming content with the fact that my current situation isn’t my permanent situation. Unless I laze around and make it so.

Alright, so this was basically me calling myself out on my noise. Lashing out my demons and putting it in writing what I want to accomplish. I hope this inspires you to write yours, even if you keep it private. I hope it guides you and maintains your vision.

I’ll see you in 2019

A new wave

Caitlin xx

[ask-artsy-oncie]

Welp, I did it

Behold, Human!AU Snack Pack, they are essentially the theater clique at their high school.

I have made the... very regrettable mistake of trying to use watercolor pencils on non-watercolor paper and let me tell you all it was a PAIN

But I got it done and here it is

Let’s learn a little about them, shall we? (HUGE shout out to @jammiehamato for throwing together a ton of headcanons for everybody!! I implemented a lot of them into this!! There are also some headcanons inspired by @chasinthecloudsaway and their fanfiction)

Suki Mendoza

-Half Filipino, Half African-American (first generation American on father’s side)

- Bisexual

- Has known Poppy and Branch since Kindergarten school, one of Poppy’s closest friends, one of the few people Branch can tolerate at his worst

-Has trouble finding her inside voice, tends to speak really loudly

-Dance is her main form of exercise and she’s really good at it, her secondary form of exercise being basketball (she’ll 2v2 with Branch, Guy, and Satin, or 5v5 on a team with Branch, Guy, Satin, and Smidge)

-Models for Satin and Chenille’s Etsy page

-When she gets passionate about something she’ll start speaking in rapid-fire Tagalog

Creek Sinclair

-Immigrant from Great Britain (came to America during middle school)

-Heterosexual

-Met Poppy and the rest of the Snack Pack during their freshman (his sophomore) year of high school (second to last member of the Snack Pack, only Gristle is newer than he is)

-Excels in science classes (physics and biology being his strong points)

-Teaches yoga to the Snack Pack (attempts to teach it to Branch) and is often found stretching or meditating before school hours

-Has a superiority complex and always tries to give off the illusion that he’s on the moral high ground (will antagonize others)

-Also no longer a member of the Snack Pack after being dumped by Poppy

Popi “Poppy” Hanako

-Japanese-American (second generation American on both sides, her grandparents from both sides came to America around the same time)

-Pansexual

-Friends with her neighbor, Branch, essentially since birth (their families were good friends prior to either of them being born)

-Tries to befriend everyone and everything. She often has to be stopped from feeding wild animals. That being said, a lot of critters, birds, and strays will follow her around because she feeds them

-Fills scrapbook after scrapbook after scrapbook with all the events of her and her friends’ lives (carries around one of those instax instant cameras just for this purpose)

-Crushes really easily and really hard, but never dated until Creek came along

-Plays many instruments, but her go-to instrument is the guitar

Brandon “Branch” Figaroa

-3/4 Mestizo, 1/4 Black-Latino (prefers the term “Mixed Latino” or just “Latino” because his entire family is from Latin America) (first generation American)

-Bisexual

-Friends with his neighbor, Poppy, essentially since birth (their families were good friends prior to either of them being born)

-Had a below-the-knee amputation when he was five years old due to a car crash that crippled him and killed his parents. He has a prosthetic left leg. (He actually has three different types of prosthetic legs by the time he’s in high school (and done growing), one that he wears nearly all the time, a waterproof one for swimming, and a more realistic-looking one that he only wears on very special occasions (like his performance in the school musical, “Aida”, because he couldn’t cover his legs with pants) because it’s expensive and he doesn’t want to scuff it up by wearing it all the time)

-Usually ends up socializing with other people ONLY because Poppy drags him along, is very emotionally dependent on Poppy

-Incredibly talented at poetry, writing, and songwriting, but usually too self-conscious to share it with the world

-Played the violin since middle school, was in middle school orchestra

Bridget Garcia

-Mexican-American (second generation American, doesn’t know Spanish)

-Heterosexual

-Met Poppy and the Snack Pack so far in sixth grade, when they helped her find the confidence to audition for the school talent show, she’s also a very close friend to both Poppy and Branch

-Moved from Austin, Texas to San Francisco, California at the end of fifth grade

-She grew her hair out in eighth/ninth grade, with Poppy’s encouragement to do so

-Pastel is her  a e s t h e t i c (so is disco/70′s memorabilia) and her room and closet reflect this

-Gristle is, in her opinion, the most beautiful guy on earth, and had a crush on him ever since she moved to California, but never told anyone until sophomore year of high school (and, of course, once she tells the Snack Pack, they come up with the most elaborate scheme to get them together, which ABSOLUTELY involves a pink jumpsuit, an ungodly amount of colored hairspray, and an earpiece for them to relay things to say to her)

Gary “Gristle” King, Jr.

-White American

-Heterosexual

-Joined the Snack Pack when he and Bridget started dating in sophomore year of high school, but had known Branch as his tutor for a few years prior

-Got his nickname for being exceptionally greasy (his undying love for pizza doesn’t help this at all). He not only accepts, but embraces this nickname because he doesn’t know why he has it or how he earned it, he just thinks it’s so cool that he has nick name.

-Does not do well in academics, but really loves, and is really good at dancing and rollerskating, instead.

-Just like Poppy, he tries to befriend everyone and everything, and he’s actually generally well-liked because of this

-Thanks to this

quote from the art book, Gristle is that guy who still wears the same clothes he grew out of in middle school, haha. (I mean, one doesn’t really grow much, after high school)

Sadie “Smidge” and Felipe Roberto

-Identical twins (Smidge is a transgirl, and chose her name, but “Smidge” was a nickname she’s had since before she came out)

-Of Puerto Rican descent (third generation American, their grandparents were New Yourican, they don’t know Spanish)

-Asexuals

-Became friends with Poppy and the Snack Pack so far in fourth grade

- Felipe is mute and mostly uses a dry-erase board to talk to others (Poppy always gifts him with new dry-erase colors to use) but uses ASL to talk to his sister. If he doesn’t have his dry-erase board handy, Smidge translates from ASL so people who don’t know ASL can understand him

-People also sometimes affectionately call him “Scuzz” or “Fuzz” because he almost always grows his hair out, he hates having it cut

-Smidge LOVES sports and weight lifting and can usually be found at the gym. She will also fight anyone who hurts her friends (people are scared of her)

-They are the shortest people in their high school, at just 4′7″

Benjamin “Biggie” Denver

-Immigrant from Great Britain (came to America in fifth grade)

-Homosexual

-Poppy and the Snack Pack so far befriended him on the first day of school, because he was shy and didn’t seem to have any friends, yet

-Mr. Dinkles is his therapy pet chihuahua that he spoils to BITS and all his collars are rhinestone studded and if he’ll bring him wherever he can get away with bringing him (his biggest enemies are “no dogs allowed” signs)

-He strives to one day be a pet photographer and volunteers at the local animal shelter to take pictures for their website

-He’s very good at comforting the other members of the Snack Pack, and is usually the one to talk Branch down from his depressive episodes

-He carries around his digital camera all the time, and usually helps Poppy fill her scrapbooks by emailing her the pictures he’s taken

Guy Dihrati

-Indian-American (first generation American)

-Pansexual, but most people mistake him for homosexual

-Met Poppy, Branch, and Suki in third grade (he had already been friends with Cooper)

-Will only wear things that either already have glitter or sequins on them, or can have glitter or sequins added to them (and, of course, even his hair has glitter in it)

-If he had a higher pain tolerance, he’d get more piercings than just his ears

-He’s self confident to the point where he can borderline on narcissistic

-He and Suki become best friends, and people would think they were dating if they didn’t already think that he’s gay. They can usually be found hanging out with each other and playfully teasing Branch and Poppy (usually Branch) because of how openly cuddly they are. They’re basically capable of grade-school levels of humor, but it’s endearing, all the same

Cooper Laboy

-African-American

-Homosexual

-Met Poppy, Branch, and Suki in third grade (he had already been friends with Guy)

-Before getting his tattoos at the age of 16, he would often draw on his arms with pen, and sometimes, he’d end up with really elaborate designs that would unfortunately wash off in the shower

-He is so very passionate about dancing! He also is the theater teacher’s aide and helps choreograph for the school musicals (and, in the future, for the theater workshop Poppy runs in the summers)

-He has a different bow-tie everyday, and has drawers at home just full of them

-People try to challenge him to rap battles, he always wins

Shuchun “Satin” and Xuilan “Chenille” Wu

-Identical twins

-Immigrants from (formerly British) Hong Kong (Satin and Chenille are their chosen American names) (They came to America in fourth grade)

-Satin is heterosexual, Chenille is homosexual

-They became friends with Poppy and the Snack Pack so far in fifth grade (and tbh Chenille had a crush on Suki ever since)

-They run an Etsy store where they sell outfits they sewn

-They absolutely ABHOR how blandly Branch dresses, and will sometimes try to drag him off to go clothes shopping, despite his protests (once they get his measurements for costuming in the school musical, they try to sew him new clothes)

-They run costuming and makeup for the school productions (and, in the future, for the theater workshop Poppy runs in the summers) and do so in tandem to performing in said productions

-They’ll braid their hair together when they’re bored, they’ve done so ever since they were small children

Holy Hell this took me five hours to write. I hope you like it!!

[flatsuke]

KBTBB Cell Phone Headcanons

a/n: these memelords, i swear

@maidofstars @bolt8826 @tsundere-eevee @themysticaldaydreamer @alolan-lillie lolol

Eisuke:

You betcha this guy owns the most expensive phone in the market. Practicality aside, he prioritizes prestige when it comes to using cell phones.

Uses this as a phone case. It’s luxurious, yet classy at the same time and hella pricey, too, this rich twat

He has MC on speed dial. On average, he probably calls her about 15 times a day. He claims to do it because he wants to give her errands, but, really, he just wants to hear her voice. Not that he’ll ever admit it out loud, this weenie.

His most used app is probably Gmail or some email app. This guy gets thousands of emails, and he has to skim through all of them in a day.

He has way too much paid apps. He’s the guy that buys his way through a game. 200,000 gold coins cost $59.99? No problem. He’ll buy 10 sets of those.

He never buys bootleg chargers or phone accessories. Why settle for the shitty ones when you can afford the original ones?

Because he’s a predictable weenie, his phone passcode is 0101.

His phone lock screen is a picture of some fancy wine he drank on a business trip, but his home screen is a picture he took of the coffee MC made for him.

He takes an unholy amount of selfies when he thinks no one is looking.

The photos on his phone are password-protected because he doesn’t want anyone to see the album full of secretly-taken candid shots of MC. They’re only for his viewing pleasure.

Soryu: 

He doesn’t really care much for the price or popularity of the phone model. Durability and functionality are what matter to him.

Has this as a phone case. Since his job involves a lot of physical activity and occasional violence, his phone case has to be shock-proof, drop-proof—everything-proof, basically.

He has a ton of ebooks saved on his phone, but he still prefers reading physical copies of the book.

He always accidentally drops his phone on his face because of how bulky his phone is. Ouch.

He blocked Baba and Mamoru as contacts. Baba kept spamming him with memes, and Mamoru’s name alone just pissed Soryu off.

He doesn’t really take pictures, but his phone album contains a few. Namely, a few pics of the Ice Dragons lined up, the penthouse crew messing around, and MC making omelettes, of course.

He has virtually no social media apps on his phone except  the app for the bidders group chat which he can’t seem to delete no matter how much he tries. Looks like someone hacked into it lol

He has Inui and Samejima on speed dial. Samejima’s always quick to answer his calls, but Inui has this annoying ass voice mail that Soryu hates listening to.

He mostly uses the generic settings of his phone. Generic wallpaper, ringtone, brightness, etc. One time, Ota snagged Soryu’s phone and messed with the settings. His wallpaper was a picture of Ota dabbing, and his ringtone was a recording of Mamoru’s sneezing. Soryu was pissed.

There was this one time MC wore a cheongsam, and Baba (before Soryu blocked him) sent him a pic of her wearing it. Needless to say, it was his phone home screen for weeks. 

Baba:

He’s not picky with his phones, so long as they have a decent amount of memory. He saves a ton of pics, videos, apps, etc.

Chose this phone case. He saw it at the mall and thought it looked really cool, so he bought it on a whim. Plus, it moves!

He definitely has almost every dating app on his phone. Tinder, OkCupid, Match.com—no wonder he’s always “busy.”

His photo album is full of juicy blackmail material of the other bidders (except MC, of course). No one tries to piss Baba off because only god knows what kind of secrets lie in his phone...

He has contact photos and names for everybody!

Everyone hates hearing his voice mail because he always adds a kissy sound effect at the end.

He’s extremely active on social media! He’s the guy who comments/likes the posts of all the other bidders. Too bad some of them blocked him lolol

No one can figure out what the hell his phone passcode is. The other bidders tried every conceivable combination that made sense, but they still haven’t figured it out yet. Baba can only shrug at them. Hint: it’s the day MC first met the bidders lol

His phone lock screen is a corny love quote, while his home screen is an even cornier love quote.

His phone rings every 0.001 seconds because of the obscene amount of notifications he gets.

Ota:

He usually has the latest model of whatever phone is on the market. Gotta stay young and fresh, right?

Has this phone case, which he designed himself. Of course, most of Ota’s accessories are DIY. 

His most used app is Instagram! He posts pictures of doggos, art, and MC. According to him, she’s aesthetic.

He always has to delete apps every now and then to make space in his phone because he always has too much pics saved. He probably has more than 10,000 photos saved.

He always spams the group chat with memes. He has a folder just for memes and reaction photos.

His phone lock screen is a puppy, while his home screen is a picture of the blue bird painting he made.

He has a ton of songs saved on his phone for inspiration. Since doesn’t take care of his earphones, they always do the thing where one ear has music, while the other doesn’t. Ota freaks out when that happens.

He has a drawing app for sudden strikes of inspiration. 

He always runs out of battery because he uses his phone too much, so he usually mooches off the other bidders’ chargers and portable batteries.

His ring tone is a nightcore version of Numa Numa. He purposely set it that way to annoy the others.

Mamoru:

He uses a relatively older model smartphone because he’s too lazy to buy a new one.

He’s dropped his phone so many times that the screen has cracks and scratches all over the place. He put tape on his phone in an attempt to fix it. It’s a miracle his phone still works.

He doesn’t own a phone case. Too much of a hassle to buy.

He doesn’t organize his apps, so they’re all mixed up. He probably has about five pages of unsorted apps, 98% of which he barely uses anymore.

He has waaaay too many unread messages, emails, missed calls, and notifications. He ignores people he doesn’t want to talk to.

He forgets to delete the spam texts, so whenever he checks his messages, it’s full of “YOU HAVE WON 1,000,000!!!”

He uses bootleg chargers, so he always has to replace them after a month or so, depending on how shitty the charger is. “Get a legit charger, dummy.” “Nah.”

He sets five alarms every day, but he never wakes up to any of them.

His phone lock screen is the generic preset wallpaper, but his home screen is a picture of him and Minami celebrating after they first cracked a case together.

He doesn’t usually call people, but when he does, he always hangs up first. 

Shuichi:

He originally had the same phone model as Eisuke, so when Shuichi found out about it, he immediately changed his phone out of spite.

Uses this phone case. It’s simple, not too flashy, and nice to look at.

All his apps are organized painstakingly, each in their own specific folders. Hell, he even has a ‘delete later’ folder for apps he doesn’t like.

He hates it when people try to look through his phone, so he never leaves it lying around. He doesn’t want anyone seeing pictures of him as Shu. Only Hikaru and MC have the privilege of looking through his phone.

He uses the touch ID/fingerprint ID as a phone lock, so no idiot can invade his privacy.

His phone has been in vibrate mode for as long as he can remember.

He’s always stressed, so he loves using those calming, stress-relief apps. One of those apps is a punching bag app where you get to put a pic of a person on a punching bag and hit it repeatedly. Shuichi put Eisuke’s face on it, and since then, his stress levels have reduced significantly.

His phone lock screen is a pic of a tranquil landscape, while his home screen his a pic of the cactus he’s taking care of.

He made a separate group chat just for himself, Hikaru, and MC. The chat’s name is called “vent”, and they mostly trash-talk a certain brunette CEO.

He has a chess app on his phone that he uses all the time. He plays with other players around the world, but he has yet to lose to any of them.

Luke:

He really doesn’t care about phones or owning one, but because of Eisuke’s insistence, he had to get a smartphone.

He’s not used to texting with a touchscreen, so most of his texts are full of typos. No one dares to make fun of him for it because MC will chew them out if they do.

He doesn’t use much apps, but he immensely enjoys Neko Atsume

He has never used social media until the other bidders forced him to.

His only contacts are the bidders, but even then, he still blocked them all (except for Eisuke and MC).

His phone is on airplane mode 90% of the time.

He originally didn’t want a phone case, but when MC gave him a cat phone case for his birthday, he loved it. Since then, he has never taken the case off.

He sets an everyday alarm for his precious tea time. God forbid he miss it.

His phone lock screen is a pic of a kitty he found, while his home screen is a pic of MC (with her collarbones showing, of course) cuddling that same kitten.

He doesn’t really reply to people when they text him. Even Eisuke has a hard time reaching Luke. The only time Luke replies fast is when MC texts him.

Hikaru:

This guy jailbroke, cracked, and modded his phone and all the apps in it. He messed with it so much that the interface doesn’t even look the same anymore.

He’s the prick that can get all the in-app purchases for free. The only reason he gets high scores in most of the apps is because he cheats lmao.

He has the loudest, most obnoxious-sounding ringtone so that when he loses his phone, he’ll be able to hear it right away when he calls it.

He purposely uses an unusual phone case so people will be less inclined to steal his phone.

His lock screen is pitch black, but his home screen is a pic of himself, Shuichi, and MC hanging out together.

He screencaps some moments from the group chat to use as receipts later on.

His passcode is 6969 just because.

He always tries to distract MC by flooding her with memes and badly-edited photos of the other guys.

He prefers texting to calling because he hates having to use his fake voice even on the phone.

Whenever he calls MC, they always argue about who should hang up first.

Bonus - MC:

She prefers using a smaller smartphone because of its portability and practicality.

She uses this phone case. There was something about the Alice in Wonderland design that attracted her to it...

Her phone is usually burning hot because the bidders spam her and the group chat with notifications all the damn time.

She tried blocking them all, but Hikaru hacked into her phone, and now she’s forever stuck with those pricks. She’s currently saving for a new phone.

She uses to-do list apps all the time. Most of the things on her list are strange requests from the other guys.

She purposely answers Eisuke’s calls after five rings just to piss him off.

Her lock screen is a picture of money to motivate herself to keep going to the penthouse. Her home screen is a group selfie she took during her birthday with the other bidders.

None of the bidders are aware, but she has a folder full of blackmail material, too.

She has dating sims on her phone to relieve her stress, much to the others’ jealousy.

Just like Baba, she has personalized contact names for the others. She even set personalized ringtones for them:

Eisuke: The Imperial March

Soryu: Guile’s Theme (SNES)

Baba: Careless Whisper

Ota: Dogsong

Mamoru: Mii Channel Music

Shuichi: Ironside (Kill Bill Sirens)

Luke: Spooky Scary Skeletons

Hikaru: Windows Gourmet Race

[willowthephotographer]

OTTAWA ICON - Maryam & Dhivya

“Two great friends entering a journey together. Together, in school for Medical Radiation Technology, and pursuing portrait photography!”

Maryam @marya.mali : Hey! My name is Maryam Ali. I am 22 years old and am currently living and studying in Ottawa, Ontario.  I am a first generation Somali-Canadian. I love reading, taking long strolls through Netflix, and eating at new and fancy places :) My guilty pleasure tv show is MTV's Catfish (it’s 2018 and people are still getting catfished, HOW???). A recent book I’ve read is by Trevor Noah called Born A Crime. It’s quite an insightful read and would highly recommend it. Dhivya @dhivya.sri : Hi :) I’m Dhivya Sriranganathan. I am a 22-year-old student and have lived my whole life in Ottawa. I have way too many interests, but I’m really into visual arts, singing, reading (something I haven’t done in a while though) and photography. I’m always trying to learn something new, so recently I have been wanting to take up graphic designing/digital art! I’ll see far I get with that though haha.

Questions

What was your first impressions of each other? M: You know what's funny? I thought Dhivya was a little rude at first. It was grade 8, I was new to the school and we were in the same class. I would attempt at making conversation but she wouldn’t really want to talk. Once we did start talking though we found out that we had a lot in common and hit it off.  It’s funny now looking back at it, and how far we’ve come since. But yeah, I thought she was rude aha!

D: I always find it funny when Maryam recounts her side of the story. It makes me look like the bad guy! She was the new kid in our class and all I wanted to do was introduce myself, but for anyone who knows me, they’ll know I’m pretty shy. Also, my RBF doesn’t help either lol. But if you look at us now, we’re like an old married couple lol.

What are you both in school for? What made you pursue this path? M: I’ve always had a passion for science. Ever since I was in kindergarten I knew I wanted to pursue a career within the science field. As I got older, biology and medicine were the areas in science that interested me the most. After high school, I did my undergraduate studies at the University of Ottawa. I graduated this year, and now have my Bachelors of Science in Biomedical Science, with a Minor in Law. Currently, I’m in my first year of studies at Algonquin College for Medical Radiation Technology. I find that this program is really a perfect blend of both science and photography. Consider me a sort of medical photographer. It’s really interesting so far and I’m excited for what’s to come.

D: I graduated this year from the University of Ottawa with a BSc in Biopharmaceutical Sciences. I’m currently in my first year of Medical Radiation Technology at Algonquin College as well! I decided to pursue this path because I knew that I wanted to work in healthcare and specifically, I found the diagnostic aspect of it really interesting. I also love how this program incorporates the arts and sciences as I have a huge appreciation for any medium of art, as well as the health sciences.

What was it that introduced photography to you? M: When I was about 8 years old, my dad bought our first family camera. I would always sneak away with the camera to take my own photos and videos, only to delete them later on so I wouldn't get caught. Just after my dad bought his camera, my principal at my elementary school bought the same camera. He saw how much I loved using it and decided to make me the school’s photographer. Ever since, I’ve taken every opportunity to learn more about photography and develop my skills. I bought myself my first DSLR in the summer of 2016. Dhivya was also interested in photography, and we decided to learn how to use our cameras together. 2 years later, and I’ve done photoshoots, weddings, a bit of videography, and am now learning about diagnostic imaging.

D: I would say that my brother was the one who introduced photography to me! When we were little kids, he’d be the one making funny music videos of my sister and I would be the assistant. He’s a very techie sort of guy and always knew what he was talking about in terms of the newest camera equipment. I never understood it until I started using our family’s DSLR for the first time in 2016. I shot my brother’s prom and I fell in love with shooting! From then on, I wanted to learn more and luckily, I had Maryam, so we were able to learn together. I’ve done a bunch of portrait shoots and event photography since then, but I’d love to venture out and try something new when I get the chance.

If you could give your past self advice, what would it be? M: If I could give my past self a piece of advice, it’d be to do the best you can with what you have available to you. When it came to photography, I was always a little self conscious about not having the ‘perfect camera’ or the most expensive gear. What I’ve come to learn over time is that having nice gear, although making the job a little easier, is not what gives you the best product. What gives you the best product is learning everything you can about the supplies you have available to you and applying that knowledge. Certain people will label themselves as a photographer, but won’t know a thing about their camera. If your phone is all you have available, then learn everything you can about it. The price tag of your gear does not make the photo, you do.

D: In terms of photography and art, I would tell my past self not to worry about what others may think of my work and just continue to create. Don’t be discouraged when you look at other artists’ work because there is always room to learn and grow. Art is very subjective, so as long as I personally love my work, that should be enough. Where do you see yourself in 10 years? M: In ten years, I hope to be done my program and maybe have a MSc under my belt (not too sure yet!). I also hope to have a space I can truly call my own, one where I can think and create in peace. Maybe I’ll be married? Honestly, as cliché as it sounds, I just hope that I’m happy.

D: I hope to either by working in the healthcare field, teaching, doing research or maybe a combination of them! I hope that I’ll be able to continue creating, whether that’s taking pictures, drawing, singing or maybe even something else I haven’t yet thought about. And I hope to be doing this while I have a cute little family of my own. If you were to pass down a legacy, what would you want that to be? M: I want to be remembered as someone who’s hard work paid off. I want to be remembered as someone who cared, not just about herself, but about her family, friends, and community. I would like to leave my mark in the scientific world too (maybe discover a new element? A long shot, I know).  My dream would be to open a new hospital or medical clinic somewhere in Somalia, hopefully that will also be part of my legacy.

D: If I could pass down anything, it would be my values and core beliefs. Some of my main values include treating others the way I want to be treated, showing gratitude and being there for family and friends. I’d also love to be able to put out my artwork, whether it be in photography, art or music. Why do you think I chose you to be a part of my series “ICON OTTAWA” M: Ottawa is known as a ‘big-little city’. It’s small in comparison to Toronto, Montreal, and other notable cities, but big in its status as the nation's capital. As someone who’s lived most of her life here, it’s easy to feel as if you’re one of few creatives in the city. “ICON OTTAWA” is innovative in its approach at featuring different artists across the city, giving them a platform to showcase their art, personality and a way to connect. I believe you chose to feature me because I share something in common with everyone else in the series, a desire to imagine and create. I am truly humbled and grateful that you chose to feature me, and want to thank you and your team for all your hard-work in making this series a reality :)

D: The point of this series to connect creatives and showcase their work, so that we can come together to create something of significance for our community. I believe that I was chosen for Icon Ottawa because I am a part of a large and diverse group of artists based in Ottawa who has that ability to create. By joining this series, I am joining a collection that is larger than myself. Thank you again to Willow and her team for including me in this impactful series!

The reason I chose Maryam & Dhivya,

I heard about Maryam from our very own Ottawa Icon, Ream. Next Maryam introduced me to Dhivya. It was uncanny how close these two were in sharing the same outstanding story! These two inspirers are very intelligent and creative women. They truly empower us to fill your life with the splendours of education and art. Maryam & Dhivya's ICON is the Linnaea borealis. Also known as the ‘Twinflower’.

The twinflower is from the Honeysuckle family. It has one stem and two flowers sprout on the top. They are beloved by hummingbirds. They symbolize happiness and sibling love. The flower is a lovely pink colour. “Pink represents friendship, affection, harmony, inner peace, and approachability.” -bourncreative.com/meaning-of-the-color-pink/

A big "Thank you" to everyone on the team  involved in making this possible! Looking forward to .07 of OTTAWA ICON

  Location: Nepean Photographer: Willow Lamoureux Photography / @willowthephotographer Assistant: Anna Pickles / @anna_pickles Models:  Maryam / @marya.mali @maryamali.space Dhivya / @dhivya.sri @diyaphotos

[sam-hunt-creativetech]

Semi-Permanent 2017

 Semi-Permanent is a conference that brings together the creatives, the designers, the future thinkers and some of the biggest businesses in the world. I was lucky enough to have received tickets through work to attend this massive global event and I am grateful.

Through this event I got to meet a lot of new and impressive people, learn a lot and also re-inforce some ideas I already have and/or have forgotten/lost touch with over time.

I spoke to a few of the speakers in depth after the main talks at the after party and will not include those conversations within this blog post. I will save them for a seperate post with more specific topics of interest.

Finally, the text to follow may not be as structured as I set out to begin with as it may turn into a brain dump halfway through. 

Lucy MccCae

She pushes the boundaries and tries everything that comes to her mind. She won’t hesitate in doing what she loves and through this creates amazing things. She is inspirational to idea of trying something no matter how obscene it may sound, no matter how many people say you shouldn’t. Just do it. 

A lot of the work she does, starts with putting herself in the possibly dangerous situation, to try those weird things that everyone says is a bad idea. She has a passion for the human body and science fiction where she attempts to bridge the gap.

An interesting idea is that we can only go so far, and when that day comes the only way is  ‘Remove limbs to improve yourself’. An eye opening statement made during one of the QnA sessions where someone makes a note that we can only run as fast as the best scientist and medical team can make us go - once we hit our limit the only way to surpass our limitation is through removing that limb and swapping it to an advanced feat of technology. (This QnA might have been with Nicholas)

I was left with a powerful idea from her talk: Design with vulnerability. Make yourself vulnerable with your design, put yourself into hard situations (or the users shoes) to really understand the problem. Later on Michael Parekowhai has a similar quote except with a different basis: Don’t draw the tree until you have climbed the tree. 

My overall thoughts from here basically sum up to just try everything, the only way you’ll know it wont work is if it doesn’t. You’ll never know if you don’t try it.

Erik Klimczac

Eric showed us how beautiful data can appear and how it can yield new insights when taken from a csv or excel file and into a 3D view. In Uber’s case: visualising their cars on a map and then adding a 3D element gives the data more meaning and clarity. 

It also gives the data a fun and creative feel which subconsciously can make you start thinking about fun and creative ways of working with the data.

Not only did he talk about data but he spoke about the most important things of creating a more inspiring service (through using the data of course) He said that there is more than just observing users there are three extremely important aspects to cover when designing anything:

Combining these with the data which can make some of this clear is key to designing great products.

Natasha Jen

Natasha Jen is a partner and designer at the legendary design firm Pentagram.

Natasha spoke a lot on working with clients, some do’s and don’t’s. She also talked about going through a re-brand. Many different ways of engaging the clients in the re-brand leads to more success.

Nicholas Kumada

Sensory Design Director – Windows Mixed Reality

Exiting things are here and even more exciting things are coming. Microsoft are working on some extremely exciting products that are upcoming - one of these being the ability to meet in the same room. This works through either AR or VR (which he said a new headset is on it’s way). 

The main focus on this talk was where mixed reality and AI is heading, and the possibilities that are soon to be a reality.

Below are a few snaps of some of the powerful slides and conversation points that he presented and that resonate with me.

When speaking about the future of this technology he initially referenced HYPER-REALITY with it’s eye tracking advertisements (”Can’t see your friend”) and complete mess which he said is a really scary thought of where the future could be. Ready Player 1 is another piece of media - this time text - that he references as a good read - also speaks to the other sort of a scary VR future where people spend most of their time in “OASIS” through VR suits and the lot at the expense of being apart of the real world and making change they escape it. 

When speaking about this the MC then made the comparison to a few years ago where it was about having your head in a book and how the only thing that has changed between us escaping this reality is the technology we use to do so.

Overall though, he is optimistic for the future and mixed reality as the goal is to connect you to the place you’re in and the people around you - it’s not about blasting advertisements at you. It’s about that collaboration model.

“Taking responsibility of where we are developing and taking the future is up is paramount. What we create now, the generations below us will use. Take the car for an extreme example: extremely helpful and makes life so easy however now we are dealing with massive pollution problems globally. We can only try to anticipate as many pit falls as well can and nothing is ever perfect first time, that is why we iterate.”

 Instrument

Instrument validated a lot of ideas and some assumptions I had when it comes to designing products. As a design / creative agency they get all sorts of clients and questions and they too shared some details about how to effectively work with them and create the best products.

Hector Ouilhet

I didn’t get that much from Hector. The main thing I took from his talk was that he likes to draw dinosaurs and loves his children. I did however, get a sense of designing with purpose. Always have purpose behind everything you do.

Michael Parekowhai

Michael was an interesting guy. He really pulled through the idea that you can do it if you put the effort in. A key saying that I took away from his talk was this: “Don’t draw the tree before you have climbed it”. The meaning I took from this is don’t try to design or do something unless you have taken steps to experience it and understand it. Sure, you can look at something and design it, but it won’t be as strong as if you experience it first hand. 

Sissel Tolaas

Sissel was a really interesting person. She has a love for the sense of smell and when she first spoke I got put off by her over exertion about how smell is the only thing that matters. However, I did take a long away from here and a new way to think. I will write a seperate blog post about the conversation I had with her after the event. 

Amber Cartwright

People. People are what matter. Always keep people the main focus of anything you do. If you forget the people, you forget the success (I made that one up).  One of the things she loves is the people that her product enable and the positive change it can make such as allowing people to keep their houses.

Mark Gowing

Mark really likes graphic design. I cannot remember much of what he said now but I do remember something he likes to do: create a new typeface for each product he creates. It’s a really unique approach and loves what he does. Design systems are a big passion for him: and from what he said, proved how powerful they can be when used on large projects with multiple people.

Hayden Cox + Guests

Hayden, a surfer with a passion. He grew up in Australia and for his Design and Technology class had to do work placement. He mentioned that his boss asked for his paper on the second to last day after making him clean the toilets all week and replied to his boss, I don’t care about the hours, I’m here because I want to learn how to create boards. His boss felt really bad and he went home, bought all of the tools he’d need to create his own board and just tried it. He got as far as he could remember from observing everyone until he got stuck and called his old boss for help, who accepted to help him. Today, he is creating one of the best performance boards and has gone through many hardships, many times of running out of money and many risks. Without them, he wouldn’t be here today.

I love ugly

A passionate guy who just wants to make his kids proud. He founded the ILU brand and has gone through many hardships. He’s had banks call him up and given him a week to give them half a million dollars and many more hardships. His talk was extremely powerful and inspirational with the key message just do it, everything will work out in the end. Follow your dreams. 

Great questions to ask with everything you do

Ben Johnston

He finds gaps in the markets and creates opportunities through it. He shows how it’s ‘easy’ to start with a stupid idea and then make big dollars through it.

That’s all

I have missed a few people from this post - mainly because their points are similar to some of the others I have mentioned above. Overall takeaways from SP is that it was well worth the time - and if you do have the time to read through all of the little stories and personal take aways you’ll see how there were some amazing people and ideas presented that weekend.

[aion-rsa]

INTERVIEW: Seeley & Norton Bring Their Undead Revival to a Close

Human beings have a natural antipathy towards death. It literally takes everything from us, so we often view it as something to be feared and defied instead of as a natural part of existence — which, if taken too far, can have dangerous and even apocalyptic consequences. In 2012, writer Tim Seeley and artist Mike Norton began examining some of those consequences in their creator-owned rural horror/noir Image Comic series “Revival,” set in a fictionalized version of Wausau, Wisconsin where one day all of the town’s recent dead mysteriously returned to life. These “Revivers” turned life upside down in Wausau, and now, almost five years later, the town is on the brink of destruction as Seeley and Norton bring “Revival” to a close with issue #47.

All hope is not lost in fictional Wausau, though. The town’s defenders, which include police officer Dana Cypress and her Reviver sister Martha, aka Em, have banded together with unlikely allies aging fitness guru Lester Majak to undo the mysterious and unnatural phenomenon plaguing their town. Ahead of the series’ final issue Seeley and Norton joined us for a discussion about the origins of these important characters, the larger themes of “Revival,” and what’s next for the two creators.

CBR: “Revival” debuted almost five years ago, and now we’re just days away from the release of the 47th and final issue. How does it feel to have this story come to a natural conclusion?

Mike Norton: Good. Sad. Weird. We’ve known this day would come since we started issue one, and I don’t think either of us knew what the end would feel like. We knew how the story would end, just not how we would feel at the end.

Tim Seeley: I’m relieved in a lot of ways, mostly that we got to the end without any major hiccups. Even more relieved that the story worked out really well. When you’re in the middle of it, it can be hard to tell if everything is going to line up.

At the same time, I feel kinda bummed out, which I didn’t expect.

“Revival” explored the relationships that made up an entire small town, but one of the biggest, and perhaps the driving dynamic, was the one between the two Cypress sisters, Dana and Em. Was that bond between sisters always going to be the central focus of the book? And what made you want to focus on that bond?

Norton: I don’t know if it was Tim’s intention from the very beginning, but from the first issue, we knew that’s what it would be. The Cypress family relationship is the story of “Revival.” I guess you could say that’s how we’re different from the rest of the “dead come back” stories.

Seeley: Right, yeah this wasn’t about surviving, which is what 99% of “zombie fiction” is about. It was about living with people. We wanted to explore that subject on a macro level with the town, but also on the micro level, in relationships most of us have experienced in our lives — the relationships with our families.

EXCLUSIVE: A look at Mike Norton and and colorist Mark Englert’s work in “Revival” #47

I picked “sister” as the central bond, mostly because I have two brothers, and the relationship I have with them is one of the most important things in my life. I made the characters women, mostly because I’m endlessly fascinated by them, but also because I’ve seen some really interesting dynamics between real life sisters that I wanted to play around with.

What went into the development and design of the Cypress sisters? Were Dana and Em always going to be and look like who they were in “Revival” #1?

Norton: I think Tim was pretty clear on Em from the beginning. He actually drew a picture of her before I even started. She’s not too different from another character he created when he was younger. Dana was my creation. She was originally going to be a guy.

Seeley: [Laughs] Yeah, Dana started the story as “Dane.” True story! I made up Em when I was 16, and she looks remarkably similar to my original design from 23 years ago, minus the terrible school girl skirt.

The central mystery that influenced much of the action in “Revival” suggests that one of the central themes of the book is the acceptance of death. Is that what you were aiming for?

Norton: That is definitely one of the main themes. Of all the hardships humans endure, the loss of a loved one’s life (or dealing with your own mortality) is one of the biggies. How we accept it makes us who we are.

Seeley: I’m sure my obsession with death is pretty obvious to anyone whose read any of my stuff, or seen my music collection. “Revival” is definitely about mortality — why we have to die, why it it has to hurt the people who love us, and how it inspires everything we do.

One character I felt best exemplified the idea of acceptance of death in “Revival” was Lester Majak and his attempts to defy aging. He was a character who on the surface seemed almost humorous, but was much more dangerous and dark when you delved into him. What inspired the creation and look of Lester?

Norton: Tim was the brains behind Lester. He’s sort of an evil Jack Lalane.

Seeley: Yeah, Lester was inspired by an interview I had read with Jack Lalane in the back of an airline magazine. It was a great interview, which began as a puffpiece, but sort of evolved into this observation about how Jack’s fight for fitness was really a denial of mortality. I combined that basic idea with this 80-year-old Lothario I met at a bar in San Francisco, who had lost a lot of his ability to speak from a stroke, but had lost none of his charm with the ladies.

Lester is, of course, just one of a handful of many characters that called your version of Wausau home. Looking back, who are some of your favorite characters?

Norton: Dana is my favorite overall, but Tim populated the town with lots of real people to like. Mrs. Vang, Cooper, Jeanie Gorski. I’d say the strength of the writing is shown in that I actually dislike the villainous characters we created. Like, I really hate them.

Seeley: [Laughs] I always love the villains, so I think that’s why Blaine Abel, the rather tragic exorcist and snowmobile repairman always stood out to me. I also love non-villain Wayne Cypress, based a bit on my own dad, and Weaver Fannie, the samurai Amish woman.

Mike, what always struck me about the visuals of “Revival” was the moments of action and excitement were great, but where you really shined was the character design, acting, and the tone, whether it was humorous, creepy, or horrific. Looking back, what was it like to bring this book to life on a month by month basis? What are some of the things you’ll miss about it? And what are some of the things you won’t miss?

EXCLUSIVE: A look at Mike Norton and and colorist Mark Englert’s work in “Revival” #47

Norton: The thing I won’t miss is that even with something you love, it becomes a grind after a while. Keeping up the constant schedule for five years was tougher than I thought it would be. Incredibly rewarding, but hard. I will miss the characters and setting. I love drawing characters acting. It’s by far my favorite thing to draw… well, besides rubble. And pugs. I’m really happy you thought it showed.

Seeley: The dude pulled that shit off every month for five years! How is Mike not artist of the year five years running?!

Let’s wrap up by teasing what fans can expect from “Revival” #47, the series’ finale. What are some hints you can offer about what people will see? And is this a series where you might revisit this world and it’s surviving characters later for some stories, like Tim did with “Hack/Slash?”

Norton: I really don’t see us revisiting, but as Tim showed me with the “Chew” crossover, I should never say never. The story is done, and it’s the one we wanted to tell. I don’t think there’s anything more we want to say.

Seeley: I think 47 pulls together all the threads we’ve been rolling out over the course of the series, and I think it does it in a pretty unpredictable way. I hope so, at least. I think it also shows that we really did have a plan, and that the idea of “threads” is actually very much a thematic device, almost like veins winding through this big, fleshy body we created.

I’m not sure if I’d revisit it — at least not in this form. It’s definitely a contained shape as it is. I can see some of the characters showing up — maybe I’ll do “Amish Samurai Atlee meets Cat & Dog Investigations.”

Norton: I’m so happy people read and continue to read it. I’m proud of what we did. I think it’s one of the best things Tim has ever written, and I feel lucky and honored to have been part of it.

Seeley: It was an honor for me, as well. Norton proved his place in the pantheon with this book. Thanks so much to our readers, to the few members of the comics press who kept talking about “Revival” (like you, Dave), and to our collaborators Jenny, Crank!, Juan and Mark. Also, many, many thanks to Image Comics, for existing, and for publishing our book. We owe Eric Stephenson and the production staff there many beers.

Tim is currently writing “Nightwing” and Mike, I believe you’re drawing the current “Archer & Armstrong” series for Valiant, but what’s next for you guys in terms of creator-owned books now that “Revival” has wrapped? Have you guys already begun to develop or think about potential projects?

Norton: I actually just wrapped up “Archer and Armstrong,” too! So hey, if anybody needs me to draw Spider-Man…

Seriously, though, I do have ideas for what I want to do, but I’m taking it a bit slower now for a few months. I have a story I’m writing and drawing for Dave Kellett’s webseries “Drive,” and I’m drawing an issue of Felicia Day’s “The Guild.” I have more plans for “Battlepug” and “The Answer!” and I am cooking up a creator-owned series with an old pal of mine. I’m excited!

Seeley: Whew. All I know for sure is that I’m pretty beat. I’m on “Nightwing” for the long haul, and I definitely want to do a creator-owned book to follow up “Revival,” but I’m a little hesitant to jump into another massive commitment like that. It’d be nice to write something, I dunno… dumb, after something so complex and involved. Like, just wall-to-wall sex and violence and fart jokes. [Laughs]

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