#baby ed/jack

[notfromcold]

Make You Laugh

Eddie had never felt so wretched at the beginning of shoreleave. Normally feeling sick was confined to the last day as the crew suffered through their hangovers in an attempt to board the ship at least somewhat sober when the time came.

But Eddie hadn't had anything to drink. And he probably wouldn't get to. He'd have to pay the doctor and then shell out for a room in which to curl up for a few days and hopefully sleep it all off. That didn't leave anything for drink. It didn't leave much of anything for food either but one step at a time.

Fuck Hornigold and double fuck fucking Timothy (rest his soul).

Ed and Timothy had boarded the merchant ship together during the raid. The plan - the fucking plan - was that they'd fight together in the stern. But Timothy got ... excited or panicked or something and next thing Ed knew he was running up amidships slashing and hacking as he went. Which left Ed in the stern. By himself.

He'd done his best but his arm had gotten slashed all to hell. Which sucked but admittedly didn't hold a candle to what happened to Timothy when Hornigold found out he'd abandoned his post.

Ed hadn't fucking told. Timothy got himself caught up near the bow somehow and Ed heard the mate yelling "what are you doing up here?" and winced despite his frustration and the blood dripping down his arm.

Timothy was keelhauled later that night. And Ed was called forward by the mate and informed that he'd be holystoning the decks with sea water for losing control - shredded arm and all.

It hadn't been Ed's job to watch Timothy and he could tell the mate disagreed with the punishment. The mate didn't like when expectations weren't clear. But they were all just bobbing along in Hornigold's wake so the mate handed Ed the holystone and bucket and Ed holystoned the decks. His arm didn't like that.

His arm had not gotten better in the days that followed.

So now here he was on shoreleave, tired and sick and about to pay out all his share for a doctor and a bed to crawl into. Fuck.

"Eddie! Hey Eddie!" Jack popped out of a tavern door and ran up to Ed. "Wanna bet I can chug this whole gallon of milk?"

Eddie gave Jack a once over. He did, indeed, have a gallon of milk. "What do you have that for?" he asked.

"To chug. Nicked it when the barkeep's back was turned. Come on! Think I can chug it?"

"No," Ed said.

"Watch!" Jack winked, tipped his head back, and put the neck of the gallon to his lips. He started strong with at least five good swallows but he appeared to have forgotten he'd need to breathe at some point. His eyes began to take on a panicked look. At last he breathed in. But he forgot to take the bottle away from his lips so what he breathed in was milk.

Things got chaotic after that. Jack coughed and choked and wheezed and continued to pour a steady stream of milk down the front of his shirt.

Ed started laughing. He couldn't help it.

Then Jack started laughing, too. In between choking.

When Jack could speak again he rasped "Told you I could do it!"

That was it for Ed. "Fuck!" he gasped, laughing so hard tears ran down his cheeks. He kept trying to get himself under control then he'd look at Jack and start again.

Something was unfolding warm in his chest. That was the thing about a boy doing something stupid to make you laugh - it was stupid but it meant he wanted you to laugh.

"So where are you headed?" Jack asked once they'd finally laughed themselves out and Jack had wiped some of the milk out of his eyes.

Ed sighed. "Doctor. Fucked my arm up. Then inn, I guess. Need to sleep."

"Wanna go halvsies on a room?" Jack gave him an obviously calculating look.

"No, you'll be loud and invite the whole town over."

"Yeah, but you're fucked up enough to sleep through at least some of that. And I'll be gone during the day. Mostly. We can get a nicer room if we both chip in."

Ed thought about it. If he and Jack went in on a room together it would leave him enough coin to buy a square meal or two. And he'd have someone there if he got really sick. Jack was probably better than no one at all. Probably.

Ed would never tell but he was a little scared. At least someone would know if he died.

"Fuck it. Yeah. I'll go in on a room with you. Meet you at the inn?"

"Hell yeah!" Jack pumped the air. "Go do your doctor thing. I'll meet you at the inn."

[driftwoodthrone]

Something tells me you're going to have to put up with me for a long time to come. Well, it won't be easy, but I'll manage.

[bougiebutchbitch]

I love your fic recc masterlists. any for our flag?

YES. They all feat. my favourite angry little man getting fucked. I. Uh. Will gather some more T-rated and G-rated ones in time, as I love found-family stuff with the crew. But for now... Have a compilation of Izzy getting railed, as he so badly needs and deserves?

ALL FICS ARE EXPLICIT! BE YE WARNED! check the tags, too - I may have missed a few warnings!

If Not Now by Buukkin

I've reccommended this before, but it truly is THEE modern AU. A gorgeously drawn comic with spot-on characterisation and growth. It will hurt your heart, in the best possible way. Please heed the tag warnings - there's some domestic abuse.

You're An Idiot (do it again) by sweveris

The perfect chaser for That Scene In The Bar. After talking about Ed being "A complicated man," things get equally complicated between Stede and Izzy.

Doldrums series by xylodemon

READ THIS. It's got some of the best writing and characterisation out there! After Ed and Stede get back together, Izzy decides the best option is to leave. He winds up sailing with Jack Rackham. They set out to sea to make something of themselves, separate from the legend of Blackbeard. Only - why the fuck is the Revenge in hot pursuit? (The answer: Ed is incandescently jealous. Steddyhands is the beautiful endgame.)

you take me, untangled, by shatteredhourglass

A/B/O steddyhands. Hot, filthy, and absolutely freaking hilarious. “Oh god,” Izzy says faintly, with slight despair. “I’m going to take Stede fucking Bonnet’s virginity.”

Domestication by SpinelessDragon

I am in love with this Steddyhands A/B/O fic, starring feral Omega Izzy. I have read it an embarrassing number of times. Please go give it some love! Izzy has never had a nice heat in his life, but apparently Stede motherfucking Bonnet has decided to change that.

Good Things (you deserve them too) by IWillBeYourPet

Lucius/Izzy - Lucius decides to prank Izzy by paying a random man to flirt with him, just to see how he reacts. The plan backfires when Izzy is tentatively interested. Suddenly, Lucius can't bear to see this all go wrong - or for Izzy to get hurt.

A Deal with the Devil by Moonlessnite

Aka, how Izzy got Jack to distract Ed. this one's bittersweet and beautiful, and kinda fucked up. I dig it. Calizzy? Calicozzy? Calico Jizzy?

in the presence of touch by hawkeyedkoi

Obviously, the answer to Izzy moping after Ed is for Ed to fuck him once. Just to get it out of his system. It goes as well as you'd expect (i.e., eventual Steddyhands.)

Sharp and Steady by Lizardbitch

Stede figures out just how to dom Izzy. Established Steddyhands deliciousness! Read the sequel for fun fucked up Calico Jack/Ed/Izzy shenanigans~ ;) No, seriously. Read it. Hot damn, that hurt so good.

bet on losing dogs by f0urshame

Ed and Izzy are stuck on the Revenge post-mutiny and desertion, destined to die either at each other's hand, or by the uncaring cruelties of the ocean. Obviously, they fuck about it.

I have a million more reccs because there are sooooo many good fics out there - but these are the ones I'm currently obsessing over! Enjoy!

Feel free to add more Izzy-gets-fucked-to-within-an-inch-of-his-life fics! Or boost your own! I'm always hunting for more.

[rhaenella]

Ed Speleers’ characterisation masterclass: how to be a sarcastic little shit

Downton Abbey 4.9 “The London Season” (Christmas Special) – Jimmy Kent

You 4.8 “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” – Rhys Montrose

Star Trek: Picard 3.2 “Disengage” – Jack Crusher

[sky-neverending]

JACK(ED) WOLFE

[itzmematthias]

His side profile 😍

I want to kiss this cheek…

[bobbie-robron]

Listen… with all that’s going on, why don’t we just move all the birthday stuff back to the weekend.

Bob, who’s been helping Dawn with her driving lessons, can’t do a lesson so it’s down to Scott again 😂. Talk of Robert’s birthday (his final for many, many years). Sorry Scott, but ‘your gift’ has failed ya as Ivy, son in tow, gets her car back and some of the money she returned to Scott courtesy of Dawn (Scott is not happy by Dawn’s actions). Meanwhile, back at the Sugdens, Robert offers to move his birthday stuff to the weekend because of everything that’s going on (so evil that Robert, being considerate).

21-Apr-2005

[laceratedlamiaceae]

I love that we all talk about getting that old man pregnant but where's the discussion about that old man getting an abortion because there's no way he's ready to have a kid

[izzy-b-hands]

Ed's lil 'fuckin' hell Jack' after Jack whips him in the balls lives in my mind rent free forever

[ultimatenutshackfangirl]

A 420 collage I made in PicsArt

[ask-stede-bonnet]

You can’t have both Ed as your baby girl princess and Jack as your baby boy you need to pick!

Jack is not my baby boy! That was a joke!! Jack is some anonymous lesbian's baby boy.

[pinstripe-doodles]

kiddos

[kaitlinj16]

TAG GAME!

POST YOUR TOP 9 OTP'S AND CHALLENGE 9 OTHERS TO DO THE SAME 💖

Lucas Scott + Peyton Sawyer (One Tree Hill)

Piper Halliwell + Leo Wyatt (Charmed)

Stiles Stilinski + Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf)

Beth Dutton + Rip Wheeler (Yellowstone)

Glenn Rhee + Maggie Greene (The Walking Dead)

Wade Walker + Allison Vernon-Williams (Cry-Baby)

Rick O'Connell + Evy Carnahan (The Mummy)

Jack Dawson + Rose DeWitt-Bukater (Titanic)

Ed Warren + Lorraine Warren (The Conjuring)

🔥Tags: @chiefjacob @leyton3tla @leyton-daily @rosedewitt-bukaterdawsoncalvert @rosy-doze @love-the-walking-dead @call-of-quileutes-blog @bonesohara @bembridge-scholars

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

We were talking about unhinged ships the other day…did I ever mention the fic I saw where Stede cheats on Ed with Jack? That was A Trip

AJSHHSDJHEHGF NOOOOOO

listen that’s so fucking awful but for the purposes of an extremely messy pwp… i’m not NOT here for it. it’s like how you always come up with the angstiest fucking ways for stede and ed to miscommunicate and spiral into terrible self loathing drama. some people come up with terrible ways for the characters to have emotionally toxic gay sex. and that’s valid

but like, this works for a pwp only. if this is 100k of stede and jack having an ongoing affair, i’m out. if this stede genuinely cares for jack and is cheating on ed with jack then no im not there for that. but like, a hatefuck thing that happpens once or twice is kind of fucking hilarious

[itzmematthias]

YOUNG JOHNNY IN SHORTS FOR Y’ALL

[bobbie-robron]

If people fall in love… things get messy. And messy is the last thing I need. There’s far too much at stake.

In the first episode of December, Katie is losing confidence with the wedding prepping but Robert’s there to try and bring her up. Robert forgets to pick up Victoria from school (therefore locking her out of her home) instead having another make out session with Sadie. Sadie makes it clear that if Robert gets serious with her, they are through, no reprieve. When they are almost caught in the garage, the duo needs to be more careful. Since Jack and Diane are back soon, that means Katie is out of a place to live. Additional scenes included focusing on Sadie to show how good she is at lying and showing herself as living a ‘blameless life’ and not having looked at another man since marrying Jimmy.

01-Dec-2004