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phantom-ellie · 2 years

Text

The Lovers, the Dreamers, and Swede

Swede (it’s like suede) Jensen was a roamer. He had no permanent residence. He’d dropped out of school at 16 and spent the next 30 years working whatever menial job suited him at the moment. He had been a roadie for both a stadium country singer and a progressive metal band. He’d worked for county fairs and other events, directing parking and lazily chasing tumbleweeds of escaped cotton candy. He had a stint in a convenience store, for a week or so, but it hadn’t been for him. Most jobs hadn’t been for him. He didn’t want anything beneath his feet that wasn’t natural, wasn’t earth or grass or water or stone. He believed that grounding solved most problems. He believed it because it was true.

Swede Jensen was a second-generation stoner. He was born in the early summer of 1970, just one year off from ‘69, and he didn’t need his incomplete education to know that he was likely conceived along to the live sounds of Sly & The Family Stone, because his parents reminded him every year on his birthday. When his mother was giving birth to him, she passed her blunt to his father so she could push. Swede’s father took a big drag and hummed along to Blue Suede Shoes as the baby entered the world, and both mother and father knew what to call their tiny, shriveled, raisin of a boy. Suede. Mom and dad had less than a 6th grade education. They didn’t see much use for reading or writing, didn’t know numbers beyond what they needed to exchange cash for their next fix. So Swede Anthony Jensen went on the birth certificate, leading to a lifetime of corrections and (only mild) resentment. When Swede started his foray into the world wide web his chosen internet handle was BlueSwedeShoes70 (his stoner friends asked why he didn’t choose the number 420, but Swede wasn’t about to glorify that asshole Adolph’s birthday).

Swede Jensen was a natural-born follower. He never led anything or anyone, not if he could help it. He liked being told what to do. He liked having a place in the world, even if that position was constantly changing. He liked not having to be responsible. The world was not on his shoulders. He was at peace. He was patient, he was loyal. He didn’t follow on a whim, wouldn’t follow just anyone, but he understood that there were people more important than him out there. They were smarter, kinder, more charismatic, more able (though perhaps, none of them were wiser). Swede just wanted to play a small role in someone else’s life.

Swede Jensen was a listener. Whenever he spoke, things came out wrong. They sounded great in his head. He thought he had a unique perspective on the world. But when he tried to share it, he sounded stupid. People talked over him, gave him funny looks, or ignored him. And while this hurt him when he was younger, he gradually accepted that some people were meant to produce and others were meant to absorb. Swede was absorbent. He listened to everything, remembered everything, and said little. Everyone told Swede their secrets, their deepest feelings, their biggest life dramas that they didn’t want other (more important) people to know about. Swede was quiet, unassuming, and frequently stoned, and everyone around him knew that he was safe, would never tell. And that was Swede’s most precious thing, the knowledge that he was allowed and trusted with others’ hearts. It gave him a purpose. He could be the world’s repository of feelings and dreams. He could keep his own for himself.

Swede Jensen was a background character in everyone else’s life. He was the last to be invited, the first to be accidentally left out. If each day had a running script, he had the fewest lines. He wasn’t important enough for a love interest, or even a best friend. And by the age of 46, he had long accepted that.

Swede Jensen was an interdimensional traveler. That may have been the pot speaking, of course, but Swede felt like he was in many places at once, in so many stories, and he was the only thing that stayed the same. The only constant in the entire universe. And that’s why Swede allowed himself this background place in the world. He knew that if you added up all of the experiences one could have in each story, it would amount to the best story of them all.

Swede Jensen believed in deep ecology. While he knew that was technically an academic term, for him deep ecology meant more than a balance between man and nature, a belief in the evils of consumerism, or the promotion of biodiversity. To Swede it was deep because the earth made him feel deep, grounded, as if his body were a tree with roots running down into the rock-hard California soil for miles upon miles. There was no feeling like that on concrete or carpet. It was only surrounded by trees that he could breathe deeply, feel deeply, dream deeply.

Swede Jensen was with his friends, his found family, what upper-middle-class white women his age would call his tribe (and have it written in a cutesy font with culturally appropriative decorative symbols on their refillable coffee tumblers that they probably purchased on Etsy). They presently occupied a campground in King’s Canyon National Forest, the base of giant sequoia trees just a short walk away. Swede had chosen the campsite closest to a tree with an odd-shaped root sticking out of it. The root was in the shape of a beaver, if you squinted, or had a little bit of something in your system to stimulate the imagination. The little wooden animal was Swede’s friend. He had camped here many times over the last couple of decades.

Swede Jensen was not educated, not skilled, not a valued member of society, not noticed, and certainly not an eco-terrorist. But, well, he was open to the possibilities. With the right leader, the right amount of peer pressure, the right amount of cannabis flowing through his system, the right amount of inhibitions lowered… It hadn’t happened yet, but it could.

Swede Jensen was smoking a blunt when the RV arrived steered by someone new to carry him and his family of outcasts on the waves of a new adventure.

Swede Jensen was ready for it. He was ready for anything.

#ofmd #ofmd fanfic #Our Flag Means Death #our flag means death fanfic #swede ofmd #modern alternate universe #cross posted on AO3 #phantom ellie ofmd #ofmd modern au #phantom ellie ofmd modern au

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umbrellafics · 4 years

Note

Can you do a five x sibling reader where they’re cleaning blood off of him and he feels cared for he’s just needs some love 🥺

a/n: awww of course thanks for the request

Cleanup

Five x Sibling! Reader

(GIF isn’t mine)

Warnings: Blood, murder mention

Summary: Five shows up, covered in blood, with a way to go home. Before he goes anywhere he needs to clean himself up.

*SEASON TWO SPOILERS AHEAD*

“Don’t call the number, it’s probably some single mother doing her best” you sighed as Diego and Luther were calling the number of the supposed killer “Why killer would reveal their name anyway” you tried to reason but you already know there’s no getting through to the idiots when their mind is set on something.

“Well that mother shouldn’t have murdered Elliot” Diego muttered before dialing the number. Luther nodded in agreement with Diego standing right next to him. Once Olga picked up Diego’s voice became deeper as he threatened her. You facepalmed and debated on teasing Diego for sounding like Batman but the internal debate ended when five walked in covered in blood. “It’s Öga för öga you idiots” Five said, sounding like a disappointed father “Means Eye for an eye, which means the Swedes killed Elliot” Luther nodded in understanding while Diego quickly apologized to the poor lady and hung up. “Told you” you said before looking back at five

“What happened” you asked, worry obvious in your voice. “It’s nothing” Five brushed it off before continuing “I’ve found a way to get back home” he said pausing to answer the inevitable questions. Luther, Diego, and you erupted with questions.

“How did you do it”

“Why are you covered in blood”

“What did you do”

“How do you know Swedish, dad never taught us that language”

Five rolled his eyes before handing you three watches “Here they’re synced you all have to meet me in the alley outside in-” he pauses to check his watch “-87 minutes” Five stops to see if there are questions before returning “Luther, you’ll find Allison. Diego, get Klaus. Me and y/n will get Vanya, since she lost her memories it’ll be harder to get her” Diego walked toward his younger but still older brother menacing before asking “And what if we don’t, every other thing you’ve proposed has got us into shit what makes you think we’ll follow you again?” Five takes a deep breath before threatening “If you don’t do this I’ll kill you myself” which serves to shut up Diego though he obviously wanted to say more.

As the Luther and Diego walk off on their respective quest you turn to Five “Before we go we need to do something” you started walking toward Elliot’s kitchen to grab a wash cloth and wet it while Five complained “We literally don’t have time for this” you simply rolled your eyes and walked back up to him and started to wipe the blood of his face and then rubbing the cloth over his hands “Plus all the blood is going to scare poor baby Vanya” you said while rubbing the cloth in his palm. Five would never admit it but he really liked this, he eased up slightly as he enjoyed being taken care of. “Fine” he sighed softly before allowing you to clean him up before letting him drive to the barn where Vanya lives

a/n: this is my first real fic I hope you liked it and I pray this what anon wanted anyway I wish all you fellow umbrellas a lovely rest of your life save thanks for reading the entire story

#five hargreeves #five hargreeves x reader #luther hargreeves #luther hargreeves x reader #diego hargreeves x reader #diego hargreeves #tua #tua x reader #umbrellas are cool

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number5theboy · 4 years

Text

ALRIGHT

THIS SEASON

IT WAS A LOT

my liveblogged thoughts under the cut

Episode 1

· Exhilarating! I love Ben

· Ben already has more lines in these first five minutes than he had in the first season

· This montage is good

· ALLISON BABY

· Luther yelled for Diego first I love this

· Diego is immediately in vigilante mode…….hot

· THE SHOT PARELLING VANYA’S FIRST WORDS

· Vanya is a mess we love to see it

· The shot of Five’s feet hitting the puddle? So aesthetically pleasing

· The battle scene is such a smart way of reintroducing everyone’s powers and their Final Form™ succinctly

· I love Hazel. So much.

· The Umbrella Atomic Explosion™ is SO clever I love it

· ALRIGHT UNCHARTERED TERRITORY LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOO

· Oh Hazel and Five make me soft

· Agnes and Hazel had a good life

· Hazel is so dead

· Welp that took no time at all

· “How many times did I say bulletproof briefcases?” ily mister five

· I love the Swedes they’re stupid

· Are we ever gonna know what Agnes made Hazel promise?

· Five is honestly world’s best character

· FUTURE HEADQUARTERS

· “Well the truth is out there!” abkdkblhlkbkhl

· I shouldn’t make quick judgments, but conspiracy nut guy is nice and I hope he doesn’t turn out evil, because I also through Harold was nice in the beginning

· Diego got himself arrested already what an idiot

· Asddjgflkflhfl Diego’s problems all put out

· Okay, set-up for Diego’s character arc of self-actualisation we love to see it

· Lila is awesome, but I hope they don’t make her crush on him excessively

· Diego and Five is an underrated duo

· THEY ARE SO BICKERY

· Five is jut gonna murder him sometime along the way

· I LOVE FIVE SO MUCH WHAT A LITTLE SHIT

· Oof Vanya is so cute in that outfit

· This scene perfectly encapsulates women having to listen to men

· VANYA’S GOING TO MILFTOWN Y’ALL

· I cannot tell white men apart, does Carl look like conspiracy nut guy or is it just me?

· As usual, Ben and Klaus are bad at everything

· “neither does your beard” icon Ben Hargreeves

· I support Ben pummelling Klaus

· I passionately hate the beard and love the coat

· Why do all the white men look alike, I thought this poker dude was a Swede

· I KNEW BEN WAS LYING

· “Pick a better time to self-actualise!”

· I still hate the beard, let’s see if it grows on me

· Yusuf Gatewood………….hot

· By far the hottest couple so far in TUA

· Please tell me she’s not still hung up on Luther

· Yes she is goddammit

· The moon thing is cute though, I can appreciate that

· Luther finally gets a well-soundtracked fight scene I love it

· OI THAT WAS BRUTAL HOLY SHIT

· Oh Luther is pulling a Five in feeling bad about his excessive violence

· I already hate his boss

· Raymond marry me pls

· Allison marry me pls

· OH MY GOD VANYA LAUGHED

· Sissy and Vanya have excellent chemistry

· Oh I see the deliberate parallel with Vanya, Umbrella Academy, you aren’t fooling me

· SWEDISH ASSASSINS BABY

· Do you think they’ll say a single word or?

· Literally the only way this show knows how to signal danger is through flickering lights

· Two bopping fight scene and Five hasn’t been in any of them

· Lila and Diego have no braincells between them it’s beautiful

· Alright, she knows how to fight……..supicious

· If this show wasn’t so hellbent on making Luther and Allison a thing, he would be best ace rep

· Lmao “I don’t give a shit” I love you Luther

EPISODE TWO

· ALRIGHT THE HANDLER IS BACK???????

· Okay so Hazel and Cha-Cha are dead but that pestilence still runs around??? Bruuuuuuuuuh

· Kate Walsh is still hot though

· AJ??????

· THE FISH SMOKES?!?

· God the Commission is such a capitalist hellhole

· Oh there we have 743

· H E R B

· Okay I am here to see her humiliated but please no redemption arc for her

· I love the deliberate parallels between Five and the Handler

· “Like a masseuse?” IDIOTS

· Oh Five is so lost and vulnerable baby boy

· Also the character developments in Luther!!!!!

· “Dad should’ve left him on the moon.” Five is, simply said, an icon

· Oof Sissy is SO cute

· I’m already not ready for Five to find Vanya

· Lila is so extra can we keep her

· Great now I have sympathy for Carl

· Luther’s new outfit looks so good on him

· OH LUTHER IS THE FIRST ONE TO SEE HER

· Well that was dramatic and didn’t lead anywhere

· Alright two episodes in, Civil Rights plotline hasn’t been fucked up yet

· WHAT THE FUCK IS THE SWEDE DRINKING SO CONSCPICOUSLY

· ELLIOTT IS THE NAME OF MISTER CONSPIRACY

· “cousins on my robot mother’s side”

· “Imagine Batman, then aim lower.”

· Lila is great I love her

· Diego is gonna throw both Five and Lila through a wall at some point

· Five is so ready to throw Diego under the bus

· Klaus Hargreeves, world’s worst cult leader

· ……….did Klaus built a cult on pop lyrics?

· Klaus and Raymond bonding I love it

· DIEGO AND FIVE BEST TEAM

· REGINALD IS THE UMBRELLA MAN

· OH LUTHER IS GONNA FIND HER HOLY SHIT

· THE BARN FROM THE PROMO PICTURE

· This scene is so good

· “You shouldn’t be the one to apologise.” I’M GONNA CRY

· Tom Hopper and Ellen Page are so good in this scene

· WHY DID HE LEAVE

· What the flying fuck is up with the Swedes

· BRO WHAT THE FUCK

· Is Five ever gonna bring up the fact that he was supposed to kill Kennedy or?

· Raymond is wasted on someone who doesn’t give him her whole heart

· What the FUCK, Klaus

· Why does she remember her name tho

· The violin starting up when she talks about the callouses on Vanya’s hands

· Brotherly bonding is my new favourite scene

· Do the filmmakers know that your scene can be suspenseful and well-lit

· Okay maybe baby Pogo is cute

· There is gonna be no Five murdering spree, the blood is solely from Pogo

· Next well-soundtracked fight scene

· The choreography of this!!!!!

· Man Reginald is a shitty dad before he even becomes a dad

· Diego cannot catch a break poor baby

EPISODE 3

· SHITTY WIG ON KLAUS ALERT

· THE LEVITATION IS BEN I HATE THIS

· So far, all title card umbrellas have not disappointed

· You are running in a straight line you really should hit her

· Yep, Watchmen flashbacks

· Luther remains cute and awkward

· THEY ARE TALKING TO EACH OTHER BABY

· S E Q U I N S

· SNEAKY LADY ALLISON IS BACK

· FINALLY

· A HUG

· Allison and Klaus are so cute

· What in the goddamn Looney Tunes is this outfit lady

· WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU LADY

· ALLISON HARGREEVES YOU QUEEN

· This spooky ghost show is great

· Everyone going off on Five is great

· @ this show stop ripping Vanya and Five apart and let them be soft

· Diego is so naked this entire season

· Diego and Lila are a good dynamic

· Elliott is a babe I love him

· The Handler continues to be creepy about Five

· So much driving

· Luther is baby and Raymond deserves better than to deal with all the baggage from all the Hargreeves brothers

· HE SHAVED THE BEARD

· Ouch this is awkward

· I don’t get why they didn’t cast normal Dave to play young Dave they’re not that far apart in age

· Oh he’s gonna have to let Dave go

· Oh this scene must be so triggering

· Oh shit’s bad and it’s only episode 3

· PUPPY???

· WE WERE RIGHT ABOUT LILA

· WHAT DO YOU MEAN THANKS MOM

EPISODE 4

· Oh my god the Handler is pure fucking evil

· She learnt the fighting from her mom alright

· THE RED BOOTS WERE THERE ALL ALONG

· Man I hoped that the antisemitism was gone

· Vanya being protective of Luther :’)

· Luther only has shitty father figures

· I can’t believe they were better organised last season

· Why do you hate the Vanya/Five dynamic so much, show?

· Five got an extra dose of asshole today this season huh

· Reggie is probably the twelfth

· Oh boy Klaus is a trainwreck

· That marriage is also a trainwreck

· I understand Ray though

· Why is there Styx on this soundtrack

· Oh Klaus baby

· GALA NIGHT BITCHES

· Five is a smart young old man

· Oh baby is eating his heart out

· Oh the hug makes me soft though

· Honestly, Tom Hopper and Emmy Raver Lampman have such cute chemistry

· AWKWARD DARLING MAN

· “Doomsday” *nervous chuckle*

· Ballroom lessons as kids

· This is an excellent dance scene

· OH MY GOD MOM WAS MADE AFTER A REAL WOMAN

· THIS SHOW MAN THIS SHOW

· Reggie is gross

· Diego’s mommy AND daddy issues are put on blast this season

· Sissy is such a babe

· Man we got budget BUDGET for this season

· Alright, the white violin can revive people now cool cool cool

· How different her powers are when powered by love

· I love Elliott I hope he survives the eason

· I am down for Luther and Elliott getting high together

· LET’S GO LESBIIIAAAAAAAAAANS

· God Allison and Klaus make me so soft

· I am very supportive of Elliott and Luther becoming bros

· You already shanked one son, go poker stick another one

· YES EXCELLENT FIGHT MUSIC

· They both?????? Just left him to fend for himself??????????

· Ancient Greek??? Bitch what

· This show is rated for violence and we have barely seen any!!!!!! What!!!!!!!

Episode 5

· Okay baby Pogo and Grace is adorable

· Why is Pogo in space now

· THEY KILLED POGO

· AGAIN

· Hargeeves got a hug before Five did what the effing fuck

· He might be a dick but his instincts are good

· Haha old cowboy

· Ben is so done

· Vanya……..Sissy……..my heart

· Wow Reginald continues to be a massive arse

· Luther/Diego/Five are DUMB and I love them

· “No, bro, he shanked your heart.”

· God the Handler!!!!!!

· THE MUSIC AT THE REUNION

· We didn’t even see Five reunite with Allison and Klaus!!!!!

· GOD WHAT A SISTERLY UPGRADE

· KLAUS VANYA AND ALLISON HUGGING

· Allison and Diego rights babey!!!

· Are the Swedes ever gonna say something or

· LILA AND FIVE TEAM-UP LET’S GO

· I’VE MISSED YOU ALL SO MUCH I’M GONNA CRY BABY

· The red-blue dynamic in Luther and Diego I live for that

· Luther and Diego are gooooooood together

· What is up with that

· Klaus, Vanya and Allison are dumbasses and I love them so much

· Alright where are the Swedes doing and why is that tree so creepy

· Oh the youngest Swede just went tits-up

· Please tell me Five is finally getting a fight scene

· Excellent fight scene

· Great, now I feel sad for the Swedes

· They deffo have a cooler aesthetic than Hazel and Cha-Cha

· This cover is beautiful

EPISODE 6

· This wig looks better than Klaus’

· Also Ben has barely been in this season where is he at

· Oof Ray is so cute

· The Handler and Five have such good chemistry holy shit

· Diego, Luther and Vanya are a god-tier dynamic

· We love the CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

· BENNY BOY HAS A CRUSH

· Wait how is this only episode six I feel like this is already the pensum of the first season

· Clothing montage baby!!!!!

· God they look so good together

· Oh Allison can be RUTHLESS

· THE BINGO CARDS

· Oh no no no no I didn’t think Klaus and Dave could be even more tragic

· THEY TALK

· God she is so fucking creepy stop lusting after a child

· World’s most satisfying elevator shot

· This scene is chaos I love it

· God everyone just harps on Diego’s daddy issues jesus

· Oh baby no

· Oh babies no

· NO NOT THE DISSOLUTION OF TEAM ZERO

· Why are there so many antisemitic dogwhistles in this

· This scene between Five and Reginald is good

· NOT ELLIOTT

· Oh no no no no Carl

· Alright at least this promises a good fight scene

EPISODE 7

· This polka music bops

· Wait how did he get to 1982

· HE SAID FUCK

· Man Carmichael was out so quick

· No fish-eating?

· Awwwww Klaus and Ben have a heart to heart

· Oh God, Diego and Luther have no brain activity between the two of them

· That is a Look

· Oh this montage of Ben rediscovering touch

· The writing of this show was oddly prophetic

· Oh wait Vanya’s gonna be incarcerated too right????

· Oh this is heart-breaking

· Really?????? Ben’s the dorky one???

· Oh my god Ben is getting a hug and Diego is so soft

· Man why are Five and Vanya so antagonistic

· FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

· Dude a fight between them would have been so epic

· Diego

· You idiot

· Oh Allison really loves him and he loves her

· Oh I am so sad

· Yeah this episode is infinitely worse than the day that wasn’t

· FUCK YEAH BACKSTREET BOYS

· What the fuck

· Yo that is sadistic as fuck Allison what the flying fuck

· This scene might ruin the song for me

· There definitely was an easier way out

· They fucked it up

· I am not surprised

EPISODE 8

· Oh she speaks Russian

· Five just snapped and honestly deserves it

· Yeah I feel for the Swede

· What is it with commission assassins and axes this season

· “Your vagina needs fresh glasses.”

· Nepotism

· Oh Grace is turning on him baby!!

· Ha remember when we were all like ‘oh no they’re making Reggie sympathetic’

· Yeah so much for that

· Five and Luther are……..soft

· What the fuck is up with that

· AYYYY BUTTHOLE SURFERS ON THE SOUNDTRACK

· Oooooohhhhhhh trippy kid scene

· Also Reggie is bad at German

· I love Luther and Five so much

· We finally get to see older Five’s tie pattern

· Alright Lila makes me uncomfortable

· FIVE IS GONNA GO FERAL Y’ALL LET’S GO

· Man after the last rampage you’d think they’d upped security in this place

· Herb for president!!

· Some catch Diego’s ego is going berserk

· Oh not again

· Dot is a rebel now

· Everyone is ragging on Five, even Five

· This is so trippy

· Oh yeah the brains. Forgot about those.

· I……….sad

· Oh my god oh my god oh my god

· Of course it’s all the government’s fault

· Love how they just walked into an FBI building

· Bro what the fuck is going on

EPISODE 9

· Allison is always there for Vanya and I love her

· Hello Klaus and Diego are so cute

· Oh my heart you go Klaus

· So much for that

· BUT BEN

· YOU ARE CLIFF-HANGERING BE INSIDE AN EPISODE

· Crazy Five is an idiot I love him

· “I’m the daddy here” is not the gazelle, but it’ll do in a pinch

· The 743!!!!!!

· Oh God, Harlan is in danger

· She loves him?!? You barely know the man!!!!!!

· WHAT’S ON THE PAPER

· Oh it’s her file

· HELLO LET US SEE THE FIVES TYING TO OFF EACH OTHER

· This continues to be trippy

· These visuals are so stunning

· This is my favourite scene so far, this is so good, this is an excellent talk

· NO

· NOT BEN

· “I’m askin’, Carl.” You go Sissy, love you, you’re doing excellent

· Alright, we have a mini-Vanya here

· Oh I hate the Handler so fucking much she is the worst

· What a plot-twist

· Oh god so much is going on in this season

· Oh we get fish-eating, but it’s not Five? That’s lame

· Why are they all so hell-bent on making stupid decisions

· Klaus you idiot

· Oh that SON OF A BITCH HARGREEVES

· What the fuck what is on the dark side of the moon

· What the flying fuck what the fuck what tebdjbdgkbjdsgkbjgsdjgnj

· WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE GOING TO WAR

EPISODE 10

· Oh the kids are back for Ben’s funeral

· I hate this

· Reginald is just. The worst.

· My emotions are all over the place

· Oh……..babies

· OH MY GOD DIEGO

· AND FIVE

· It wouldn’t hurt to go to an abandoned farm

· God this is a family of shitty choices

· I don’t want Ben to be gone

· FAMILY TIME

· Oh shit I totally forgot about the last Swede

· BRO THE STAKES

· YEAH THIS LOOKS BAD

· ALRIGHT Harland is gonna be alright

· All these assassins have shit aim

· HE’S MATRIXING

· LILA’S ONE OF THE 43

· SHE CAN ABSORB AND REDIRECT THEIR ENERGIES

· ONE OF THEM ONE OF THEM ONE OF THEM

· Awwwwww they love each other

· Oh great THEY’RE DEAD AGAIN

· Oh now LILA will have to fix the timeline

· Wait now they’re all dead

· The swede to the rescue?

· Please tell me she’s dead for good this time

· We love a de facto protagonist saving everyone’s asses once more

· GO VANYA SAVE THE BABY

· Dot and Herb are precious dumbasses

· This is heart-breaking, but I understand Sissy so much

· WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS CLIFFHANGER

#tua spoilers #not that you'd understand much if you don't watch the episodes #personal #come yell at me in my inbox please

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hyperactivelittlebee · 4 years

Text

Keeping Secrets 2/?

Back at it again with RenDad lol. To answer any potential questions- The oddity at Area 77 takes place during- well, the Area 77 arc- and Keeping Secrets occurs at the beginning of Season 6. Yes, Pele(Ren’s kid) and Amal exist in the same universe. This is all during the same universe, just different periods of time! This is a hermit’s being parents au. It will include Ships! But a few of the parents will be single- like Ren here. There will other kids in the future! Warnings for everyone- Character death and slight description is in this part. Alright, now that were done with that- Enjoy!

“I’m Grian…”

Ren couldn’t breathe. His chest was too tight, mind racing and body frozen in fear as the demon’s eyes scanned the small crowd. His eyes landed on Ren, and the moment the Lycan dreaded came as his eyes slowly widened in recognition.

"You…" His voice was barely a whisper, and in a moment's notice he was scrambling to his feet, cradling the bundle in his arms gently as he walked shakily toward him. He looked around Ren frantically before looking up at him pleadingly, "Where is she?"

The brunette opened his mouth, but no sound came out as he felt everyone in the room looking between them in confusion, their eyes burning holes into him as he tried to think of a lie.

"I-I...who?"

"You know who! Where's Elna? Please- please tell me she's safe I-I-"

"I-I really don't know who you're talking about- I- I don't even know an Elna…"

It was the blondes turn to fumble on his words, despair written on his features. He searched Ren's face frantically, and soon the Lycan's obvious anxiety became apparent. Grian's eyes widened as it clicked to him, looking to see the long healed claw-like scars along the man's arms, too thin and long to be from anything but a demon child.

The rest of the people here didn't know there was another demon on the server, and this man had been raising her in secret.

And Grian had just outed him.

Stepping back again, he gulped and looked away, "I-im sorry...it uh...seems I mistook you for someone else…" There was a sigh of relief from Ren, "Yea uh...no worries dude-" Ren's gaze settled on the blond demon's face, heart aching as he so badly wished he could tell the demon that Pele was fine, that she was healthy and cared for, and that she was happy with him.

However, a cry from the baby in his arms had Grian turning his attention from Ren, gently rocking him and cooing softly. Xisuma walked over and put a gentle hand on Grian's back, leading him back to where False, Mumbo, Doc, and Stress were gathered. Behind his eyes, flashbacks to that day played. The sight of betrayal in a young man's eyes towards his friend, the way blood dripped off the golden sword.

That incubus with golden locks and pretty blue eyes, looking so pained as he put Pele in Ren's arms, seeming resigned to a fate Ren hadn't understood in that moment.

The pure malice and insanity in the noirette demons eyes as he lectured the other demons, and the sight of his sword cutting through the incubus' neck and slashing his throat clean open.

Iskall walked over to him, concern written all over his face as his best friend looked uncharacteristically distant and fearful, as if memories were playing behind his eyes. He rested a hand on Ren’s shoulder, making the Lycan jump. For a split second, he looked terrified before he realized who was standing there.

His heart warming at the sight of the Swede, Ren felt a smile cross his features.

"Iskall…"

"Are you alright? You seem kind of out of it, dude."

Ren tried to laugh off the man's concern, taking a deep breath, "Just fine. I'm just sort of wondering who the new guy mistook me for-" He watched as the crowd dispersed, Xisuma and Mumbo walking away with Grian, "He seemed...so concerned."

Iskall hummed in contemplation, "For X to make this big of a deal, I'm sure he's one of the special case hermits. Kind of like Tango was, but more extreme I guess?"

Tango...

Tango was the only demon the server knew of, but he was more of a Blaze hybrid. He didn't have the whole horns and wings thing, but instead the only tell-tale signs were his eyes and a tail that made him mistakable for an animal hybrid instead. Tango was the first secret case he had been a part of, and he was one of the few to witness the man's first interaction with Impulse and Zedaph. The three of them immediately clicked in the sweetest way. Tango came stumbling out of the nether portal after Xisuma, only to trip and fall right on top of Impulse- who had been waiting too close to the portal- which would've been romantic if the blaze wasn't in the midst of a panic attack. As if on instinct, Zedaph had crouched down and started to comfort him, Impulse joining in until the taller of the 3 fell asleep in their arms, making them smile at each other in silent agreement.

Since then, they had been inseparable.

Almost like him and Pele.

"I guess so…"

They continued to talk for a bit, until Stress finally called Iskall for them to head back to their bases. Ren winked at his friend, joking that his Ice queen was calling, making Iskall snort and punch his arm. He watched as Iskall ran back over to Stress, smiling as the smaller woman leaned up and pecked Iskall on the lips before they waved goodbye to Ren, taking off with their elytras.

Sighing, Ren turned and started heading home.

~~~~~~~~~

"...and this is where you can stay until you get started on a base, or until I can get a better room for you," Mumbo motioned to the double bed in the makeshift treehouse. For once, he was cursing himself for not having built a better place. Xisuma was relieved when Mumbo offered to let Grian stay with him, having a deep trust in the man's capability.

Grian felt it was perfect.

His body was aching in exhaustion as he walked over and sat on the bed, exhaustion hitting him like a brick as he gently rocked the infant in his arms. The taller of the three noticed this and walked over, kneeling down and cupping the demon's cheek gently with one hand, the other touching the bundle in Grian's arms cautiously.

"Let me take him for now. I'll watch him while you sleep, I promise."

Grian was nervous. He didn't want to just hand his baby over to a stranger, yet he knew he had no choice. He was too exhausted from it all.

The fear as Mini and Zee ran beside him. The utter terror as he watched Mini tell him goodbye, staying behind to stall Taurtis.

The burning in his legs as he just ran, ran, ran, listening to the crying bundle in Zee's arms. Him and Zee needed to make it out. If they didn't- if they were caught- Grian knew it would be the end. Zee would die, and the Taurtis would most likely kill the baby once he realized it wasn't his. The safety of his lover and baby were at the top of his list right now, and he knew Zee was thinking the same as the taller demon gripped his hand with not a single sign of letting him go.

Slowly, Grian handed his baby to Mumbo, admiring how the human man knew just how gently to cradle the demon infant. At the thought of his lover, Grians heart clenched in unbearable pain, the memories resurfacing.

As they reached the nether portal, Grian ran up to a man in a suit. He collapsed against the frame of the obsidian portal, legs shaking from the long distance they ran. He heard him and Zee exchange words before Zee handed the baby to the man, their words muffled to him due to the blood rushing in his ears. He watched in tired confusion as Zee let go of his hand. He stood up as best as he could, look at his lover in worry, "Zee? What are you-"

Before he could continue, the red head hugged him close, arms tight around him, holding him as if it was the last time he would.

Grian had no idea it would be.

He pulled back and intertwined their fingers with one hand, Grian still so confused at what was happening, "Dearest, look at me, please…"

Grian looked up into Zees ruby red orbs, the lively, beautiful eyes he fell in love with.

"Z-zee?"

Taking as deep breath, Zee cupped Grian's cheek, leaning down and capturing Grians lips in his own. The blond reciprocated the kiss eagerly.

Zee kissed him like it was the end of the world. He kissed him like he was trying to convey every emotion he felt for Grian in a single kiss, filled with so much tenderness, passion, and love it made Grian's heart melt. For a second, Grian forgot about it all. He forgot this was life or death, he forgot about the man in the suit probably awkwardly watching, he forgot about the world around them. His hands cupped Zees face, dedicating every detail to memory.

Then Zee pulled back, the two of them panting as Zee rested his forehead on Grian's.

"Grian, I love you so much. Ever since we met, you've been the light in the dark for me and you've brought me nothing but joy and happiness. I want you to remember this okay?" Grian nodded gently, still lost, "I. Love. You. I love you, and I will never stop loving you. Never, ever forget that…"

"I love you too, but what-"

"YOU!!!"

Fear filled Grian as Zee turned, facing a very, VERY, pissed Taurtis. Zee grabbed the man in the suits sword, "RUN!" The man grabbed Grian's arm and tugged him to the portal, but Grian buried his heels in place, "Zee!! What are you doing- Let me go!!" Grian struggled, tears filling his eyes as he watched Taurtis and Zees swords clash. The two fought hard, but Grian knew Zee would lose. Zee had never been a fighter, and his footwork was clumsy compared to Taurtis. Suddenly he was yanked forward and an arm wrapped around his waist. He was picked up and thrown over the suited man's shoulder, "I'm so sorry about this!!"

"ZEE!!!" Grian cried out and struggled, sobbing as he reached out for Zee.

Just before he went through the portal, Grian saw his worst nightmare come true.

Zee stumbled forward, his eyes locking with Grian's for a split second as Taurtis got behind him. Grian let out a shriek as he watched the sword be stabbed into Zees back, a look of unbearable pain flashing across his face before Grian was suddenly in a new world.

Grian felt a sob erupt from his throat, shoulders shaking. Mumbos eyes widened and X seemed alarmed, carefully taking the baby from Mumbo as the noirette reached out. As soon as Mumbo touched his shoulder, Grian launched forward, wrapping his arms around Mumbo’s torso and burying his face in the tall man's collar bone. He cried. He cried, and cried, and for a while it seemed he'd never stop sobbing.

Mumbo held him tightly, gently petting his hair and rubbing circles in his back, his own heart aching at the demon's pure heartbreak.

He thought back to the promise- The one he had made to the red-headed demon.

He wouldn't let anything happen to Grian and his baby. He wouldn't let Grian suffer anymore.

He was going to pick up the broken pieces of Grian one by one, no matter how long it took and how rough things got. The blond needed somebody by his side, and Mumbo was more than willing to be that person.

~~~~~~~~~~

As Ren opened the door to his base, he was immediately greeted by the sight of Tango telling an extravagant story to a more than amused Pele. Chuckling, Ren spoke up, "I'm home!" Pele perked up and looked at him, "Dad!" She stood up and ran over, jumping to hug him. Ren felt his heart warm as he hugged the young demon tightly, chuckling, "Someones excited today, huh?" He laughed as he let go, ruffling her hair a bit, making her yelp.

Pele was now 16, turning 17 soon. Ren knew in just a few more years, she'd be able to meet the rest of the hermits. For now though, only Tango knew of her existence- due to him being half demon as well, Ren trusted him to help with the things Ren couldn't understand about his daughter.

"Tang-tang was just telling me about another project him, Pulsey, and Zed are working on!"

"Really now?" Ren looked at Tango, who was standing by with a grin, "Let me guess, a rocket shop?"

Tango gasped dramatic, "Well dang man, figured me out so quickly?! Am I that predictable?"

"Nah, just a wild guess." Tango chuckled before turning to hug Pele tightly, "Alright, I gotta get going. I'll continue the story next time! Alright?" The young girl nodded and Tango ruffled her hair fondly the same way Ren did, "Alright then, then be good ya little fire-starter!" The demon walked out and Ren trailed behind him, shutting the door behind him.

Ren sighed in relief, smiling weakly at Tango, "Thanks again for coming on short notice- X just called out of nowhere and I-I-"

Noticing the stress practically rolling off the Lycan, Tango reached out and gently squeezed Ren's bicep. Ren looked up to see the golden blond giving him a smile, full of fondness and warmth, "Seriously Ren, it's no big deal. You know how much I love hanging out with your kid- she's practically like a niece to me. Don't you ever worry about having to call me out of nowhere, okay? I'm here."

Ren could've cried, silently thanking whatever god there was for the people around him. His smile widening, Tango pulled him into a tight hug before stepping back. He waved goodbye and took off, leaving Ren alone on the beach.

The lycan turned and headed back inside, seeing Pele sitting on the floor with a basket of flowers. She loved weaving them, so Ren always picked her baskets to give her something to do other than reading and practicing.

"Is the princess makin' more crowns?" Ren walked over and sat down beside Pele. The demoness giggled before picking up a flower crown made beautiful blue hydrangeas and putting it on Ren's head. Grinning, Ren threw his head back dramatic and fluttered his lashes, "So, Am I fabulous yet Le-le?" He swooned dramatically and Pele cracked up, leaning into her father's side while laughing, being careful not to hurt him with her horns.

Ren smiled fondly at her, chuckling, "Seriously though, I love it. It's wonderful, Le-le." He pecked her forehead and pulled her into a side hug before straightening the crown, "I think I'll keep it on for a while, hm?"

Pele snickered, smiling widely, "You look like a Hippie, dad."

Ren quirked a brow before making a face, "Yeeeeaaa rock on mayyyynnn-"

Almost instantly Pele started laughing again, hitting his chest, "Oh my god Dad no!!"

Watching her laugh, Ren relaxed.

This was fine.

He wasn't going to lose his little girl just because someone from her past came back and recognized him…

Would he?

#hermitcraft #hermitshipping #grumbo #rendog #grianmc #iskall85 #hermitkiddoau

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danielsarmand · 4 years

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ok i said i would do this and my body won’t let me go on with my life until i do but i feel like there’s so much to say about each episode that i cannot make a comprehensive post so i’ll just do separate ones for each one. i am only halfway through the show but here’s my absolutely not required opinions on tua 2x01

i have to say when i first started watching i wasn’t sure i liked any of the situations the guys were (are,) in and i am still not positive that i do? going by number order so it’s easier:

luther... well, actually not much to say about that, what a start. but him and five are probably the ones that left me the most neutral, in the sense that i was just happy to see him and i didn’t think much of anything — the situation he is in might be a bit weird but that’s obviously tied to his inability to exist without a father figure of sorts despite how fucked up said father figure might be so like... classic luther

diego... i mean. it’s just that i don’t really get it? like, not him being in a sanatorium — that, all things considered, i get — but his obsession with saving kennedy. okay, he has a hero complex and i always did know he’s a bit on the dumber side (sorry diego) but the volume of his idiocy is astronomical now like what does he expect to even do doesn’t he understand he should interfere as little as possible with historical events and why is he running around telling people kennedy is going to get shot i mean you’re just BEGGING to get hospitalised aren’t you,,, plus don’t uh... don’t sue me but i don’t really like the whole subplot with lila, she is an interesting character and i already have my theories about her so obviously she’s going to be more than just a possibly romantic plot for diego but at the same time way from the trailer they pushed so much on this and on them being sexually attracted to one another so there’s a lot of... unnecessary bits that honestly i would’ve lived without (especially considering patch existed and wasn’t this collective fever dream) but of course that’s how tv shows work so whatever

allison... yeah i mean. i don’t. i don’t really get her marriage as well, lmao. i like that she is a civil rights organiser and i do think what’s happening in her storyline is important and has to be shown in such a context but, even though she does explain she thought everyone was dead and that five would take years to get back to her, i have. so much trouble believing she would move on THAT quickly. not from luther i mean, just in general, from the fact that she has a daughter in another timeline and all. the LAST thing i would think of in her place would be marrying someone and possibly starting yet another family i won’t necessarily be able to keep and for some reason i have serious trouble believing anyone would think differently but i do get it’s subjective and she needed something to latch on so idk, i can’t really like this but i will try my best to understand it i suppose?

klaus is... a mess. that’s just. that’s just klaus for you,,, he is sober but he doesn’t seem to have changed much because his main problem is being a dickhead and he still hasn’t grown out of that phase so honestly i wasn’t expecting much from him and i can’t be disappointed if i wasn’t expecting anything (: NJFGESRGNESK i do love klaus a lot but what else is there to say

five is five and he’s doing his classic five thing so apart from him being a genius comedian which absolutely cracks me up i am just happy to see him in his little shorts again with his funny old man walk and his threats to anything that moves

ben. ben. absolute love of my life light of my eyes my sweet baby angel... bitch. NFEJRNGJKSERG i knew that, since he’s going to have way more space this season, being a regular and all, his sassy remarks were going to multiply, and i do love that he gives shit to klaus all the time considering klaus has been doing the same exact thing AND WORSE for years on end but i have to admit when he told him “nobody wants your shit, klaus. that’s why you’re always alone.” that felt like a bit much to me. i know klaus deserves to be called out on his bullshit to hopefully grow a bit, and i know ben just said this as a spur-of-the-moment sentence and then they were back to being the funny bickering duo who hamster fights on the street, but i just... it hit me just how genuinely tired ben must be. because he’s always been nothing but supportive, and he did always call klaus out but he never went that far and always said the complete opposite actually, which is things like “there’s nothing luther wouldn’t do to save your scrawny little junkie ass” and “you can do it” and “you don’t have to do this alone, i know how important this is for you”. so, yeah. i felt a bit meh about it, i will admit this. i also felt like i was overreacting and got over it pretty quickly but it did sting, also because as much as i’m always on about klaus being an idiot i still do love him a lot and i was like okay... okay please settle down now,,, the “unfinished business” thing i’ll mention later on because there’s a whole paragraph i need to write about it

i absolutely love that vanya has lost her memory in a sense, because this does really give a blank slate to a character that was so far gone i’m not sure how recovery could’ve taken place. i do think when things will start to resurface we’ll have to deal with that, but also vanya seems so much more... at peace. and assertive. and sure of herself, or at least not so... i don’t know how to phrase it. not so much of a passive bystander. she doesn’t know who she was, she doesn’t know what happened, but she seems to know who she is now in a way and — even though no powers were used in episode one yet — the control this gives her over her powers is amazing. without even knowing she has them, she can control them better than she ever did, just because of how much more calmer she is in general. i love that for her. i love her so much ): she is the cutest bean ever i just want to kiss her on the nose i am In Love and i love that she’s so good with harlan and that harlan seems to get things about her she probably doesn’t even get herself yet. i am more invested in her bond with harlan than i am in her bond with sissy, if i have to be honest. i guess i just don’t care much about romantic relationships in this show lmao

yeah i? think episode one was pretty much it? just getting to know where the characters are at this moment in their lives and familiarising with new elements and as i said i expected to be a bit less... meh with it all but it’s episode one so it’s not a big deal

OH YEAH I AM so sorry for hazel i loved him so much and i had no idea this was going to happen so i was so shocked when he suddenly died feels like shit just want him back

i do love the swedes a lot i know they’re some of the bad guys (though honestly i doubt they’re the main villains) but as i mentioned already they’re just so interesting both visually and in how they operate and i wonder if they’re some of the other kids born the same way as the hargreeves because they call them twins later on but they look nothing like twins + one of them drinks this weird thing at some point which definitely wasn’t milk so i’m wondering what exactly are they but i’m sure there’s plenty to unpack there

#tua #the umbrella academy #tua2 spoilers #tua spoilers #and in this essay i will #when i said i don't care about romantic relationships i hope you know harcest ships weren't included #but this is just another reason why i ship them between one another #i think it's just way too complicated for them to maintain relationships outside considering the shit they're always surrounded with #so it's either... no relationships or like a leftovers recipe you know use what you find home kinda thing #im going to jail for these tags #it's been real you guys

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iznightwing · 4 years

Text

TUA Season 2 Spoilers

So, this is my immediate reactions to the new season of The Umbrella Academy. Please enjoy

Episode 1

They all got stuck in different parts of early 60s Dalas, TX

Threat of nucular war

"The Swedes" are our main(?) protagonists for this season it seems

Diego(1963) is in a mental asylum because he's trying to stop JFK's assassination.

Vanya(1963) has some minor amnesia

Luthor(1962) is a mobster???(idk)

Allison(1961) is married, helping with the civil rights movement

Klaus(1961) stole a guys truck and fighting with Ben

Ben(with Klaus) is still a ghosty boi(😭)

Five(1963) as to figure out how to stop the fuck apocalypse ****again**** that they ended up bringing back with them

Episode 2

Handler is alive, but she got demoted

Luthor works for Jack Ruby apparently

Luthor still hates Vanya -_-

"Dad should have left him on the moon" jsjegdidu Five's fuckin savage

Diago and Lila(new character) escape the mental hospital

Allison's husband just got arrested for "assault and battery"

Diago is still trying to get Lee Harvey Oswald

Klaus is literally treated like a Hippie Jesus but he doesn't like it

They have fottage from JFK's assassination, which isn't for another 6 days, based on the show's timeline

FUCKING REGINALD IS IN THE FOOTAGE?!?!

Luthor found where Vanya has be- OH SHIT HE HAS A GUN

Luthor doesn't realize Vanya has amnesia

He wants to apologize to her???

LUTHOR DON'T DO IT

SISSY(new character) PULLED THROUGH

2 of the 3 guys sent to kill the Hargreaves are just throwing a knife at each other while the other one cooks??

Five and Diego are going to search for Reginald

Allison's husband is getting suspicious because she almost used her power in front of him

Lesbian vibes coming from Sissy and Vanya

Five being vulnerable makes me soft

Reginald has (a) mannequin family(ies)??

Pogo!!

Reginald just fucking stabbed Diego I-

Episode 3

Klaus seriously is just Hippie Jesus

Lila saved Diego's life

Vanya run girl!

Yaasss queen! You use thos powers!

Well, Five found Vanya

Luthor is trying to find Allison

Klaus and Allison reunited!!

Handler changed her appearance??

Allison is a strong independent woman, and ain't none can tell her otherwise

Daaamn klaus and Ben just used his ghosty self to get Allison's husband out of jail

Five tries to help Vanya get her memories back

I'm fairly certain Lila has a thing for Diego

THEY MADE OUT! I WAS RIGHT

Okay, they're doing more than making out

Luthor found Allison's address and met her husband. Can you say **awkward** !

Allison ain't taking no shit my dudes

DAVE!! AAAHHH

Klaus is being the awkward gay

OH FUCK OUR IS BOY HAVING SOME PTSD

KLAUS IS TRYING TO SAVE DAVE FROM GOING TO VIETNAM!

I think Ray(Allison's husband) is mad at Allison...

Vanya and Five went find Luthor

Shit going wrong at the sit-in

Oh shit Allison just made Ray scared of her by using her power

Klaus managed to get Allison out of all the chaos

Luthor just purposely lost a fight??

Lila what the fuck are you doing??

Lila, what are those keys for??

LILA YOU FUCKING WORK FOR HANDLER?!?!

MOM?!?!?!

Episode 4

FIVE WAS THAT YOU?! I SWEAR TO GOD IF IT WAS-

I don't know how I feel about this my dudes

Vanya and Luthor bonding??

Jack Ruby just fired Luthor??

Vanya and Five just had a fight

Klaus is not the best person for moral support

"He stabbed me" "I'm surprised he waited this long, Diego. We've all had the urge" jdjdgdj savage Five back at it again

So Reginald is part of a "shadow government"??

OH FUCK DAVE NOOOO

Allison, honey, you can do better babe

Oh nooo Klaus is going back to the dunk side

Welp, Klaus' followers found him

Diego, Lila and Diego doing a sneaky

Allison and Luthor have reunited!!

More sneaky

GRACE! BUT NOT A ROBOT!

Oh nooo! Harlan come back!

HARLAN NOOO

VANYA TO THE RESCUE!!

Well, Luthor just got evicted

LETS GO LESBIANS

Well, Luthor's high on laughing gas, thanks to Eliot

Ooo fight scene to KISS niiccceee

Welp I think Diego feels betrayed

Five knows ancient Greek apparently

Episode 5

BABY POGO

Pogo was apparently sent to space

That moment you realize Reginald treated Pogo more like a son than he did his own children

Diego and Five are onto Lila

Allison and Klaus are have a heart to heart

As I stated previously, LETS GO LESBIANS

Oh nooo

Luthor, you're just going to get your feelings hurt

Told you soooooo

"Dude, that's rough" I- they literally missed the opportunity to use "that's rough buddy"

Handler, what are you planning?

Now Diego doesn't trust Vanya -_-

ALL THE SIBLINGS ARE TOGETHER YAY

The Swedes are just living their best life in this random women's home

Damit Klaus

God damit Luthor

Don't follow her damit

AAAAHHHH BENNNN

Klaus calling out all the in*est shippers

"The only thing the Umbrella Academy knows about love... is how to screw it up" I didnt need called out like this Klaus

I love some quality sibling bonding

Well that guy just went boom

I lowkey like this cover of Billie Eilish's "Bad Guy"

Five figured out Lila and Handler are working together

Vanya trying to confess her love to Sissy I- baby nooo

Vany, baby, it's all gonna be okay

The swedes are down to two. Poor guys

Idk how I feel about this version of Adele's "Hello"

Klaus is confronting his followers

Allison decided to tell Ray everything

Episode 6

Allison, run baby!

Ooo how sweet!

Seriously Handler. What are you planning?

So luthor, Diego and Vanya are going to talk to Reginald

Klaus' followers won't listen to him

Allison got Ray to believe her. Yay!

Ooooh booooyyy, pooh shhhiiittt

BINGOO!

oh shit, what the hell??

Oh my god, Dave come baaaaccckkk!!!

"Unharm my wiener" oh my god

I think Luthor let rip in the elevator, lol

Reggie wants proof

And with that proof comes a mess of fruit

So, Ben can possess Klaus

Diego doooonnn't

Vulnerable Five gets me every time

Nooooo not Eliot

Sissy, it's gonna be okay baby

Oh noooo

Oh fuuucckkk

Episode 7

I have a bad feeling about this

Well that was... interesting

Klaus is being Ben's wingman and letting him possess him to talk to a girl

I don't like Carl's attitude

I knew Handler was gonna pull something

Diego just threatened an old lady because of a misunderstanding I-

Istg, I want to shoot Handler in the head again

God damnit Diego

Ben, enjoy yourself baby, but don't abuse your brother's trust

Fuck off Carl

Allison, honey, please go with Luthor

Ben, you're doing great sweetie

Diego knows that Ben is able to possess Klaus

Vanya, please don't fight with your brother

Diego, please lis- GOD DAMIT LILA

Allison, baby, its going to be okay

Sissy, what are you doing?

Backstreet boys to a fight scene. Nice

So vaccuum extensions can be a weapon

Klaus, Ben, stop fighting!

Okay, so that happened

Shiiitt

Vanya, don- SHIIIIT

Episode 8

So Vanya is the russian baby from the opening of the first season

"You've had your possession privileges revoked!" "I regret nothing!"

Oh shit, he's gonna- ope, he knows it was Handler

Diego, don't let them treat you like that man

Grace, please be careful

Grace, don't believe him

So, five is going to look for himself. Literally, not figuratively

Sissy, don't listen to him

DON'T HURT HER YOU ASSHOLES

The FBI be assholes(for legal reasons this is about the show only)

This won't end well

Lila, please. Control yourself

Five apparently doesn't trust himself(the old body version of himself)

Diego, don't fuck up

Fancy shmancy machine

Sooo, Vanya causes this apocalypse too??

Past five wants to "kill" present Five??

Brain food. Ha

Ray, just listen to your wife

Uuuuhhhh Harlan??

Episode 9

Allison, please be careful baby

"You look like Antonio Banderas with the long hair, I just thought you should know"

Common Klaus, I know you can do it baby

BEN!!

"Because I'm him, and that is exactly what I'd do if I wanted to kill me!"

"I'M THE DADDY HERE!!" Gejkzudh I'm-

743??

Carl stop it!

Sissy, POP OFF

God damnit Lila

Five. For god sakes

Oof, I felt that through the screen

"Dancing with myself" is a completely appropriate song to go with this fight scene

Ben, be careful baby. I know your dead, but still

Vanya, baby, it's gonna be okay

Ben noooooo

Shut the fuck up Carl

OH SHIT

Lila knows the- GOD DAMNIT IT WAS FIVE

Don't listen to her Lila!

Okay, so that just happened

Diego is still trying to stop the assassination

Five sent old Five through his rift to 2019

Well, Diego got duped

Reginald didn't know about the plan of the assassination??

WHAT THE FUCK?!

UUUHHH

Episode 10

Okay, so we open up with Ben's funeral

Wow Reginald

Klaus apparently convinced Ben not to go to the light?

So now they're all wanted by the FBI

Guys, please listen to Vanya

Okay, so he was scared of the light, it wasn't Klaus that got him to stay

"Anyone makes a fat joke and I'm outta here"

Oh- oh no

Harlan, baby, please listen to Vanya

Uuuuhhhhhhhh

So Diego can control the direction of more than just knives. Okay then

Hell yea baby, Vanya saves the day

WHAT THE FUCK

OH SHIT, FIVE

Nooooo

Phew that was close. Why is it always Allison that almost dies?

Don't listen to her Harlan!

Listen to them Lila!

NOOOOO

WHAT THE FUCK

YASSS BITCH

Harlan, it's okay baby!

Yassss

Way to go Herb!

No Sissy, go with herrrrr

I have mixed feelings about all this

And theyre back home

Apparently Reginald is alive??

THE FUCK

#the umbrella academy spoilers #the umbrella academy #tua spoilers #TUA #swearing #tw swearing #tw caps #caps #long post

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until-theend-oftheline · 5 years

Text

The Ikea Test

Pairing: Sebastian x Reader

Warnings: Pregnant Reader, a playful dig at Swedish people (I’m danish it’s what we do. Nothing is meant by it)

Word Count: 1500ish

A/N: This is thought part of my LLL universe but as always it can also be read as a stand-alone.

Betaed by: @blacktithe7 thank you, sweetie!

***My fics are not to be saved nor posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***

It had been a long day and you were absolutely exhausted as you sat in the new armchair in your daughter’s nursery. It was your own fault really. Sebastian had been willing to pay to get designer products if that had been what you wanted. It just wasn’t.

You weren’t poor by any means but you also weren’t Beyonce or whatever Hollywood actor brought in the big bucks that the moment. You didn’t mind. New York was an expensive city to live in, but it was home to Sebastian. Truth be told you were really starting to love it too. Every street corner was starting to bring with it memories. Happy memories of a life with the sweetest, kindest man you had ever met; a man who, luckily enough, adored you as much as you did him.

So since you weren’t looking to leave New York anytime soon you just had to think a little about how you spent your money. You still lived way above average, but you knew a baby was pretty expensive. This was why you had insisted that baby clothes didn’t need to be designer brands to be comfortable and cute. You also didn’t need a room you would only use in that form for a year or two to cost an arm and a leg. Which was why you had dragged Sebastian with you to Ikea, jokingly telling him that if your relationship could sustain a trip like that, there wasn’t anything you wouldn’t be able to weather.

Sebastian had just rolled his eyes at you, but as you had entered the maze that was the department store, he had started to see the reality of your joke. Luckily, Sebastian loved shopping with you, no matter if it was clothes for one of you or things for the house, but especially when it was for your daughter.

Sebastian had been so excited ever since the first scan, but it had taken new heights after he learned you were having a baby girl. He brought home little outfits or toys she wouldn’t be able to play with for months or years all the time. You rolled your eyes at him, but the truth was, you found it endearing. You were so happy to see how excited he was to meet her, and you loved how tactile he was with you. He always was, but the further along you got in your pregnancy, the more handsy he got. Not in a sexual way necessarily, more protective and loving.

He was actually enjoying Ikea with you, so it wasn’t really much of a test in the typical sense. It was more a test of his sense of direction, or lack there off. Which did put your patience to a test in return. All in all, it had been an amazing day, and you had returned home with a mobile, the armchair you were currently sitting in breezing through the book of baby names, a dresser that had yet to be collected, and the crib Sebastian was sitting on the floor trying to assemble.

“How about Lea?” you asked only looking up from the book when Sebastian answered shortly.

“No.”

You frowned, a little annoyed with his quick dismissal of the name, but you also had a hard time holding onto that anger as you looked at him. His hair was still long from playing Bucky. He was keeping it that way in case they called him back for reshoots unless he got another role that would force him to cut it. He had currently pulled it back into a small ponytail but loose strands had escaped the rubber band prison and were framing his concentrated face as he struggled with the frame of the crib.

“You can’t just say no,” you scolded without any anger in your voice, as you extended your leg poking his side with your fuzzy socked foot. “Give me a reason why?”

“Because,” Sebastian looked up at you, blowing the hair away from his face which only helped for about five seconds. “You said you wanted her last name to be Stan.”

“Lea Stan,” you chewed the inside of your cheek, before nodding. “Yeah, that’s not gonna work. Next.”

“Honey. I’m kinda busy here,” Sebastian sighed, making you smile wider.

“I could help you?” you offered, making Sebastian shake his head.

“No. You’ll get cold on the floor. Stay up there,” he ordered, making you roll your eyes at him.

“Yes. Sir.”

“Sorry,” Sebastian sent you a sheepish smile, knowing how much you hated him ordering you around. It didn’t happen often. He wasn’t that kind of guy, but a few poorly chosen words at the wrong time had definitely taught him his lesson. Luckily you appeared to be in a great mood. You waved him off returning your attention to the book.

“How about Georgeta?” Sebastian offered absentmindedly as he returned his attention to the puzzle of furniture pieces in front of him.

“No.”

Sebastian smirked, fully expecting that answer, but he still couldn’t help but poke fun at you.

“You can’t just say no. Give me a reason?” Sebastian mocked your voice, making you laugh and gently poke his side with your foot again. That earned a hearty laugh from Sebastian as he looked up at you with sparkling eyes.

“Because sweetheart. As much as I love your mother and I do love her,” you assured him, making his smile widen. “I do not want our kid to get picked on all the way through high school.”

“Fair enough,” Sebastian chuckled, groaning to himself as he seemed to have lost some piece of the eventual crib in front of him.

“What about Victoria?” you suggested, wiggling your nose in thought, not completely sold on that one yourself.

“It’s a little posh isn’t it?” Sebastian muttered, halfway paying attention. “It there a logic to the names you are picking?”

“Yeah. I was trying to find something that could work in danish, Romanian and English. And that works with Stan, and it cute,” you listed making Sebastian laugh.

“That’s not gonna be easy, darling,” he teased before groaning in frustration again.

“Seb, just let me help.” You closed the book, pushing yourself toward the edge of the chair, ready to get on the floor.

“No, stay up there. I got this,” Sebastian let go of the crib, turning to face you, putting his hands on your thighs to prevent you from moving. Just as he did, the frame of the crib fell apart in almost slow motion, landing in four different places.

“Clearly,” you laughed as Sebastian looked over his shoulder, but stopped as soon as you realized Sebastian wasn’t even close to as amused with the whole thing as you were.

“Goddammit,” he yelled grabbing one of the pieces and flinging it across the floor. It startled you a little since you weren’t used seeing him lose his temper like that. You flinched but quickly regained composure, wrapping your arms around his head, and he, to your relief, leaned into your embrace straight away.

“I should be able to do this,” Sebastian mumbled, burying his face deeper into your lap, making you smile. He was frustrated, but he didn’t take it out on you. He never did. Instead, he sought comfort in you, and you suddenly realized this was another side of him you loved dearly.

“It’s okay. Ikea is Swedish. They overcomplicate things. That’s what Swedes do,” you reassured him, running your fingers through his hair, losing the hairband.

Sebastian looked up at you, smiling cheekily as he spoke. “Did you just insult yourself there Y/N/N?”

“I’m Danish you idiot,” you tugged his hair, making him groan a little, “not Swedish.”

The little punishment clearly hadn’t relieved Sebastian of his sudden teasing mood as his eyes kept flickering with mischief.

“Close enough,” he smirked, causing your eyes to widen. You quickly grabbed the baby book, gently whacking him over the head with it.

Sebastian jumped back a little, still laughing. “Hey! What was that for?”

“I don’t call you Russian do I?” you pouted, causing Sebastian to laugh even harder as he pushed himself onto his knees, moving between your legs.

“I. Am. So. Sorry.” Sebastian spoke, punctuating each word with a small peek to your pouty lips.

“It will never happen again,” he promised as you started to giggle at his shenanigans.

“You’re such an ass sometimes,” you sighed, wrapping your arms around his neck, and Sebastian grinned widely, knowing he was forgiven.

“You love my ass,” he wiggled his eyebrows, causing you to laugh and shake your head at him as he leaned in to kiss you deeply and tenderly.

He might not be the best carpenter in the world or even remotely close to being one at all, but he made you laugh, feel happy and loved. That was all you needed, and you would just have to make sure the crib wasn’t gonna break down with your daughter in it when Sebastian wasn’t home so his feeling wouldn’t get hurt either. You didn’t need him to be able to build you anything, but if it made him happy to try, you’d gladly let him.

Please reblog; help me spread my work - Leave a comment. Feedback is fuel

Sebastian Stan Tag Team

@feelmyroarrrr @sleepretreat @roxyspearing @jewels2876 @hellaqueerangelofthelord @danijimenezv @rumoured-whispers @becs-bunker @smoothdogsgirl @blacktithe7 @grace-for-sale @averyrogers83 @sebs-potato @sorenmarie87 @docharleythegeekqueen @erosbellarke @the-wayward-robot @super100012 @myfanficlibrarium @winchesters-favorite-girl @awkwardfangirl2014 @igotkatiepowers @dottirose @deathofmissjackson

#Sebastian Stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian x reader #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian imagine #mcu rpf #marvel rpf #lll

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sheinthatfandom · 4 years

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So I haven’t seen all of season 2 yet I’m only like the first 30 seconds of #7 I believe it’s eye for an eye idk I’m on a treadmill when I’m watching it and it’s hard to read anyway I have thoughts... surprising I know!!!

Hopefully the read more works on mobile but I’m tagging in case

[[MORE]]

Vanya: holy shit they really got me liking Vanya now good fucking job!!! She’s likeable relatable I fucking feel for her and don’t wanna fast forward her sections... I still do but it’s due to anxiety of her affair getting found out and as soon as I see that doesn’t happen I actually rewind to see her scenes so good fucking job everyone. Though the ending of the episode I just saw yeeesh.... shit gonna go bad. Also I’d bet money her giving breath of life to Harlan is going to be really fucking important idk if it’s end of the world important but I can see it being important to season 3 or being important by the end of the season somehow. I mean it’s vanya... this gotta go back to her somehow.

Luther: he went from worst to.... well not worst. Someone else I feel a lot for from his feelings about his father and holy shit seeing this man who idolized his father just get ripped apart was rough. Then his obsession with Allison just... again I’m really believing she rumores him into loving her cause so far her two husbands have been honest about shit and willing to walk away from her yet Luther can’t. In s1 when she’s driving in the car thinking of all the times she rumored someone and one was her rumoring someone into loving her. I really hope we find out this season if it’s Luther.

Allison: I like her this season. That’s shocking I know but I do. I think having her away from Luther and Diego helps and also not being around vanya and kinda acting all I’m seconds older and know more than you thing. I did not like the diner scene with her husband only cause I got a bad feeling all those witnesses are going to cause trouble now. Never leave witnesses I mean come on your husband was arrested for you punching out some asshole what do you think 30 racist eye witnesses to you having magic is gonna do?

Klaus:used to be my favorite but this season not really. Idk if it’s the cult thing but I’m not into it. The thing with David is.... God it’s so hard to watch. I wish he would just talk things out with Ben and then he could do shit the right way! Instead of causing David to sign up for the army over a week early. What if now David never meets Klaus? Here’s hoping #5 pulls a s1 and we get a redo of shit before this ends and Klaus can like not get David to sign up early.

Ben: Ben needs more lines and I really hope he doesn’t pull a Klaus with terrible ideas and uses his brothers body to get close to the girl he likes just.... no. Please Ben you give such good advice to Klaus don’t be the type of person who can’t take their own advice. I do appreciate that episode one finally shows him kicking ass and I hope to see more of that without everyone dying. And I wish he coulda said more to his father, also I wanna know how the mf died like yoo give a bitch a clue!

Diego: now the worst. From one of the first to the worst just wow. I appreciate his story and I appreciate the consistency to him having a hero complex and just being a fuck up. But if Doctor Who taught me anything it’s that you do not fuck with the timeline and he is actively trying to destroy it. For what I’ll never understand. In episode 1 it did say on a newspaper that it was the president declaring war so.... I’m guessing he’s the reason for this apocalypse. And wow if anything will destroy your heroic self perception faster is realizing you ended the world. Or he’ll cling to it even harder and be over bearing. I will say seeing him stutter broke me. Regnald was right but his future self is the cause of Diego’s and all the siblings mental and emotional problems and that needs to be remembered.

#5: the best wow just wow he is a joy and a delight and omg he’s a killer I mean I knew that but.... holy fuck did you SEE that!!!! First the donut shop and now this like FUUUUUUCCCKKK!!! So good!!!! I wish he would talk to his family about his plans and about the Commission but in all honesty no one ever listens to him. Except vanya but without her memory I’m not sure if she’ll be much help. I don’t like him working with the handler but I get why

Side characters

The handler: still love to hate her don’t trust her but the woman has got style the only thing that Ickes me out is that she kinda seems like she’s flirting with 5 and that’s a child’s body so eww no

Grace: She’s real??? I though she was from Reginald’s home planet or something I mean didn’t she die in bed or something in s1 and there were missiles and lights and stuff idk ohhh unless that was on earth this earth ooohhhh

Pogo: move over baby yoda I need baby pogo merch!!!!

Raymond: ya’ll better not kill this man I love him I hope he doesn’t end up fearing Allison but I need him to live

Sissy: the same

Carl: kill the fucker

The swedes: I love them I get they have to die and I certainly don’t want them to win but fuck they are enjoyable! Sad the milkman is gone but I liked his funeral music.

Lila: now this is where imma get some shit but I do not like her. I didn’t like her from the group therapy and the few times I started to like her I went right back to not liking her. Now that I know she’s the adopted daughter of the handler Nope Nope time to go.

Reginald: still hate him for what he’s GOING to do to the kids but man that scene with 5... how tf do ya’ll humanize such a monster??? Good job writers. And seeing him with grace and pogo he seems likeable but... I can’t forget what he put them through especially when the abuse is so evident in their adult selves.

And I think that’s it let’s see what the upcoming episodes show

#the umbrella academy #tua s2 #tua spoilers #tua s2 spoilers

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valkerymillenia · 4 years

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Umbrella Academy

season 2, episode 2

Here we go again!

All my reactions/live-blogging for this episode in a single post to avoid spamming.

"The Frankel Footage" interesting title...

Wait... Wait! Oh no... Oh no.... Don't tell me she's alive... Oh no...

FUCK!

Oh, so that's where the Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo song fits in. I was curious.

Wait, are they comparing Handler to Fairy Godmother??

I should cosplay this Handler outfit... Shouldn't I? Those shoes would murder me though.

Wait, Carmichael's name in the show is AJ? Why?

Rude fish.

Ahahah, AJ lives in a bong 😆

What's the 743 incident? 🤔

"I've dropped turds bigger than Herb" good to see she's still got claws.

Wow, the Commission is a really ungrateful bunch. I never expected to side with Handler on anything but here we are...

Is that a start map at the back of the typing pool?

Did Handler just get Five's old desk? Oh the irony...

Ahah, poor Dot. Every single time 😆

Body man! Ah! "what's that? Like a masseuse or something?" 😂 And Luther doesn't make it any better by replying "I take good care of Mr Ruby" 😂

Aww, Luther's existential crisis... Poor boy.

Luther, stop blaming Five... Dude, he did warn you that the results of time travel were unpredictable and he did save your life, stop being a little bitch and listen to your big brother.

Wait, did they actually serve alcohol to the 13 year old???

Ohhh, so that's what Hazel put in Five's pocket! November 22nd, 1963? Oohhh... (What's with Americans and putting the month before the day in dates? 🙄)

Ok, Vanya hoping that someone might be searching for her... Poor baby.

Ok, so Harlan is definitely bring coded as autistic. 🙏 Please make it good rep, please, please, please.

Aw, Diego turning politely so Lila can change. Cute boy.

Why do they keep getting into kissy positions? We get it, foreshadowing.

"you know the other window was open right?" Says the man that jumped through an unlocked door for the ✨ drama ✨

Hmm... I'm getting mixed feeling about Carl. I don't really want to hate him but... (I get a feeling in the end he and Sissy will patch things up and Vanya will end up giving up her girl, won't she? 😔)

Luther saw Vanya!!!!! Go after your sister, you dumbass!!!

So these Swedes are just rolling with the milk truck schtick, huh?

Police brutality. Of course. Very relevant to modern issues and very sad. Sadder that Allison could have kicked ass if she wanted and would have been justified but chose not to escalate.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THE SWEDES DRINKING? 😨 That stuff looks like mercury but I'm guessing it's some super soldier serum or something?

"cousins on my robot mother's side" 🤣🤣🤣 I love Five's sass.

"imagine Batman, then aim lower" 🤣🤣🤣 omg, Five, I love you.

"why don't we just kill him?" You really are Handler's daughter, Lila...

But I am liking that Diego isn't completely lost yet, dumb but not morally lost.

Diego-Five banter is the best.

Damn cop won't even look at Allison. Fucker.

Ahah, poor Klaus just can't get away from the cult, can he?

"ahah, don't touch me" poor Klaus, he's sooooo uncomfortable.

Ooohh Professor Raymond!

Awww, poor Klaus... He can't handle the pressure and the expectations... History repeats itself.

I'm loving this budding Raymond-Klaus friendship... Can we PLEASE keep it that way?

"It's in the struggle that folks find out their true calling" Raymond, you have NO IDEA how right you are.

Klaus appalled at the racism 👌 me too, man, me too.

I love how Diego and Five react so chill to the screaming paranoid dude asking questions with a gun in their faces. "Such an open-ended questions" "really depends on the people" "yeah"😆

Is Lila painting Elliot's nails? 😆

"Hazel?" "Long story" "what's doomsday?" "Longer story" 😆

Dad!

Do the Swedes not talk at all?

Aww, Harlan, baby, you have my whole heart already.

Luther... Don't do it, hoe! That's your sister, I know you're scared but LOVE HER!

Luther, baby, are you having a nervous breakdown?

AAAAWWWWWWW!!!! Good boy, Luther! Good boy!

"you shouldn't be the one to apologize."

"I let you down. I did horrible things, things that I'm not proud of... When I could have just tried helping you. I thought it was my job to keep everyone safe, and I just... I just made it all worse."

"I never wanted to be the bad guy, so if you're bullshitting me, Vanya... I don't care. If you're hiding out here and don't want to be found, I understand. I just came here to tell you that I'm sorry... For my part in what happened."

I've been waiting for this apology for a year and it's so emotional, I love it. I love you, baby boy. The fandom better forgive him now, enough Luther hate.

Ahahahah, the Swedes are killing me 🤣🤣🤣

The outfits! The one cooking fish in the flower apron and underwear and fingerless gloves. The two staring, the knife contest. What weirdos.

Why is cat lady's head in the freezer?

Diego, stop making assumptions.

Did I mention I love Five's sass? Because I love Five's sass.

DS Umbrella Manufacturing Co. I still wonder what the DS stands for... And I wonder if they inherited the company.

So, you're just leaving Elliot tied up?

Aw, Lila having a breakdown... I still don't know if I trust her but I do like her.

Pinky swear. Aw. Diego, you can be a good big brother figure to Lila but you couldn't do that for your own siblings? Really, dude?

Raymond is such a good husband. Don't let this dude die, please.

Ah! That theory that Klaus would be found because of the cult members wearing his hand tattoos? WE CALLED IT!

I get a feeling Klaus is breaking into his own house...

"no talky, sleepy time now" adorable.

Ah! I KNEW IT, it IS his house. Nice place, Klaus.

I'm guessing Klaus got into the cult thing because he wanted to be loved (as he deserves) but went too far and now he can't take the pressure and the expectations anymore (and probably doesn't think he deserves it).

Oh boy, that chemistry between Vanya and Sissy... 😏

Uh oh, flashbacks.

Aw, Five is nervous to see dad. And Diego is being a decent brother. I like.

"when I was stuck out there in the apocalypse, there wasn't a day that wasn't by where I didn't hear his voice in my head" "what was he saying?" "'I told you so'." "well, if Dad's here, he's never met you before, so he can't say 'I told you so'" "I'm sure he'll find a way" - probably, it's Reginald after all.

Yeah, Diego, you and doors. You keep forgetting you have a literal teleporter with you.

DS Umbrella? More like BS.

Oooohhh the nuclear testing bunkers from the promos are actually Reginald's creation? Unexpected.

Oh, a gala! Yes, please, I want to see that.

Baby Pogo!

Ouch, that is definitely not the Pogo we know! Poor Five, that's gotta hurt.

Badass Reginald! (The music though! So condescending 😆) I'm impressed! Very secret assassin of you.

No! DIEGO! (the irony of the knife guy getting stabbed 😬)

Two eps down!

I need more!!!!

#tua #tua s2 #tua s2 spoilers #live blogging #reactions #tua s02e02

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princesscatherinemiddleton · 5 years

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Victoria, Masako, Sofia and Letizia!

Victoria

1. Her devotion to Sweden. Cut her open and she would bleed Sweden. I can’t think of another royal in the world as devoted to their country as Vikkan.

2. Her approach to the integration of family and royalty. Taking Estelle and Oscar to small engagements. Letting them learn about the Church of Sweden and the history of the Swedish monarchy in fun ways. It’s such a genius idea and it clearly seems to be paying off as a wonderful approach.

3. Her walking tour. She walked across Sweden throughout the year and met with so many people. She is a people’s queen and that is never more evident than in her work because she chooses to be down, amongst people, celebrating her birthday and her country whenever she can.

Masako

1. Her bravery. She has had to overcome so much, and she has had to overcome it on a world stage. She’s had all the pressures of having a mental health disorder, marrrying and settling into a new family, and having children, with the added pressure of having to produce a male heir.

2. Her love for Princess Aiko. Even when she was struggling, the few times we saw Masako, her love for her baby was evident. The thought of having to raise a child who would always be told they weren’t good enough must be heartbreaking but Masako has gone out of her way to make her daughter feel loved.

3. Her passion for diplomacy. She turned down Naruhito more than once because she didn’t want to give up her career in diplomacy. She had to sacrifice part of her identity because of the rules of the Japanese constituion but she found a way of making her new life - as consort and empress - into a new type of diplomacy she could do.

Sofia (I’m assuming of Sweden)

1. Her openness. She came into the role of princess, having not lived a very princess-friendly lifestyle, and she never hid that fact. She was always open about who she was and who she is and essentially said the Swedes had to like her, or get over it. And they did. She still shows her tattoo under her formal gowns and I love that.

2. Her bond with her in laws. She has forged such a strong connection with all of her in laws. She joined Victoria on her walking tour of Dalarna. She’s been on holiday with Madde and Chris. She’s been hugged by Estelle and Leo. She fits into the Swedish royal family completely and they all adore her.

3. Her work before her marriage. She set up her own charity, which she still works with today. She studied the UN Rights of the Child. She worked to earn her own money, studied the subjects and topics she was passionate about, and started making a change as a normal, non-royal individual.

Letizia

1. Her love for her daughters. She clearly puts Leonor and Sofia and their welfare above all else. The big drama with her mother-in-law was because she was trying to protect her daughter. She chose her children over her reptutation, which was already tenuous as best in Spain.

2. Her fashion. Even when I don’t particularly like it, I love how she champions Spanish designers and wears high street alongside high end. She can walk out in a top from Zara for £10 and a jacket by Felipe Varela

3. Her work in journalism. She is clearly massively intelligent and has worked in all types of journalism. She was a journalist in multiple countries and was part way through a PhD. She covered the 2000 American elections and was live on the ground for 9/11.

☆ Pick A Royal Lady, and I’ll Share Three Positive Things About Them ☆

#mine #anon #answered #crown princess victoria #princess sofia #japanese imperial family #queen letizia #swedish royal family #spanish royal family

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aion-rsa · 4 years

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The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Complete Easter Egg and Reference Guide

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

The following contains spoilers for The Umbrella Academy season 2.

The Umbrella Academy wears its influences on its sleeve. Gerard Way and Gabriel Bá’s original comic and the Netflix series it was adapted into pay a great debt to properties like X-Men, Doom Patrol, and even The Royal Tenenbaums.

Now for its second season, The Umbrella Academy is even more devoted to Easter eggs, references, and many other real life and pop culture homages. This batch of episodes takes the Hargreeves family back to the early ‘60s where they encounter a whole new host of inspirations.

“There are tons,” showrunner Steve Blackman says of season 2 Easter eggs. “We specifically wanted to sit down and say, ‘Here are the Easter eggs we want to put in, let’s make a list of them.’ They’re everywhere. I think the fans will get a real kick once you start realizing what we’ve put in.”

Follow along with us as we catalogue every possible Easter egg and reference in The Umbrella Academy season 2. Hopefully we can clarify a thing or two about this season along the way. And hopefully you, dear reader, can help point out what we surely missed.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 1: Right Back Where We Started

This episode takes its name from Maxine Nightingale’s “Right Back Where We Started From.” And indeed that song plays as the Hargreeves family arrives in the ‘60s and tries to acclimate to their surroundings.

The season opens with the lunar-induced apocalypse that kills billions of people on Earth. The world’s destruction was essentially confirmed at the end of The Umbrella Academy season 1 but is re-confirmed here. In the original comic book, the planet is destroyed midway through volume 2 “Dallas” when Hazel and Cha-Cha detonate a nuke they stole from Reginald Hargreeves’s stash. Thankfully in this season, just as in “Dallas,” The Umbrella Academy makes it safely back in time and gets a chance to undo things.

For organizational purposes here is where each member of The Umbrella Academy lands in the early 1960s, along with what movie is playing on the local cinema’s marquee:

February 11, 1960 – Klaus and Ben – The movie is Curse of the Undead.

1961 – Allison – The movie is The Curse of the Werewolf.

1962 – Luther – Movie not visible.

September 1, 1963 – Diego – Movie not visible.

October 12, 1963 – Vanya – The movie is Kiss of the Vampire.

November 25, 1963 – Five – Movie is still Kiss of the Vampire.

The song playing during this latest apocalypse is Frank Sinatra’s “My Way.”

This thrilling series finale-esque apocalypse sequence also provides viewers with a decent reminder of what each Umbrella siblings’ power is:

Vanya uses sound to generate enormous, explosive power.

Klaus can communicate with the dead and in this instance is even able to summon the ghosts of U.S. soldiers to do battle against the Soviets.

Luther is super strong. And surprisingly flame retardant.

Ben (still dead) is able to produce monstrous tentacles from his stomach. In the comic series it is explained that he summons monsters from another dimension.

Allison quite literally possesses the power of suggestion. Her phrase “I heard a rumor” bewitches whoever hears it to do what she says.

Diego is super accurate with knives and seemingly takes his combat training more seriously than anyone in the Academy. In the comics, Diego is able to survive without breathing but for the second season in the row that appears to have not made it to the TV show. “You got Jason Momoa doing that a hundred times better anyway,” David Castañeda told Den of Geek during a set visit.

Number Five can travel through time but obviously rather imprecisely. He uses that power on a smaller scale to pop through space-time during fist fights.

Hazel makes his triumphant and brief return to the series…looking somewhere between Nick Offerman and Gandalf. He likes to call Five “old-timer” because despite having his childhood body, Five is actually in his late ‘50s.

This time around, the world will end on November 25, 1963 – notably three days after the assassination of President John F. Kennedy in Dallas.

Diego trots out a Star Wars joke about Luke Skywalker’s daddy issues that obviously no one in the asylum is able to understand, with Star Wars 14 years away from release.

Diego’s friend at the hospital is new character Lila, played by Ritu Arya. Lila has no comparable character in the comic series and is purely a show invention. Arya is best known for her work in Humans and Last Christmas.

Klaus and Ben were in San Francisco for three years before heading back to Dallas. In that time, Klaus started a cult. California was a hotspot for cults in the late ‘60s and early ‘70s. Klaus was a little ahead of the game.

Allison is preparing to participate in a sit-in with her Black peers. As early as the ‘40s but chiefly during the ‘50s and early ‘60s, sit-ins were tactics used by Civil Rights organizers in which protesters would occupy an area and refuse to move. Some of the most famous sit-ins involved Black Americans sitting at lunch counters or tables in all-white restaurants and requesting service. As Dan Fienberg points out in his season 2 review, Civil Rights organizers had largely ceased this practice by 1963.

The song playing during Diego’s time in isolation is a cover of Gnarls Barkley’s “Crazy” by Daniela Andrade.

The song playing as Diego and Lila escape is “Comin’ Home Baby” by Mel Tormé.

Luther is working for Jack Ruby – an unlikely important figure in American history. Ruby was a well-known nightclub owner in Dallas who was tied to mob activities such as illegal gambling, drugs, and prostitution. On November 24, 1963 (one day before the world “ends”), Ruby approached JFK’s killer Lee Harvey Oswald as police were escorting him from prison to court and fatally shot him at close range.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 2: The Frankel Footage

The title of this episode is clearly a take on “The Zapruder Film.” The Zapruder Film is footage of the JFK assassination recorded by Texas clothing manufacturer Abraham Zapruder. It is believed to be the most complete visual documentation of the JFK assassination and was used by the Warren Commission that investigated the asssassination. It’s also become fodder for conspiracy theories.

In the reality of The Umbrella Academy, The Frankel Footage is what Hazel slipped into Five’s pocket before he died. It documents JFK’s motorcade from the perspective of Dan and Ethel Frankel on Dealey Plaza. The Frankel Footage uncovers none other than Reginald Hargreeves holding an umbrella on the grassy knoll.

Interestingly, “The Umbrella Man” is a real figure in the complicated lore of the JFK assassination. A figure holding a black umbrella appears in the Zapruder film and at one point spins his umbrella as the President’s motorcade passes by. This led to theories that, among other things, the umbrella man was a CIA plant who signaled to Lee Harvey Oswald via his umbrella to fire the fatal shots. In reality, the Umbrella Man was discovered to be Louie Steven Witt in 1978. Witt said he brought the umbrella to the motorcade to heckle Kennedy. Kennedy’s father Joe had been a fan of Nazi-appeasing British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain. A black umbrella was Chamberlain’s trademark accessory.

The Handler lives! A bullet to the head doesn’t do as much damage as one would think on The Umbrella Academy. “Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo” from Cinderella plays as The Handler is spared from the incinerator.

The Handler’s boss at the Commission is a goldfish in a tank atop an otherwise human body. His name is “A.J.” and later on it’s revealed his last name is “Carmichael.” This comes directly from The Umbrella Academy comic where the head of the “Temps Aeternalis” is revealed to be a shubunkin goldfish named Carmichael.

“Well it finally happened – that gorilla DNA took over your mind,” Five tells Luther. This quick aside confirms that Reginald utilized gorilla DNA to save Luther’s life after a mission gone wrong.

“Who’s Diego?” Elliot (Kevin Rankin) asks Five. “Imagine Batman and then aim lower,” Five responds.

When Klaus meets one of his old followers in a holding cell and the follower asks for words of wisdom, Klaus replies with “Don’t go chasing waterfalls. Stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to.” This is a lyric from TLC’s 1995 song “Waterfalls.”

All the “Children of the Prophet” have “Hello” and “Goodbye” tattooed or scribbled on either palm. This is in reference to Klaus’s tattoos of the same nature. In the comics, Klaus’s callsign is “The Seance” and those tattoos mimic the setup of most Ouija boards.

Reginald Hargreeves owns D.S. Umbrella in Dallas. We see him open this business in the enigmatic opener of The Umbrella Academy season 1’s final episode. That episode also seemed to suggest that he’s an alien.

Baby Pogo makes his first appearance! Pogo is a chimpanzee with the intelligence of a human. He was Hargreeves’s steadfast friend and probably the only positive influence in the young Hargreeves children’s lives. He was killed by Vanya in season 1.

Five finds an invitation to Hargreeves from the Consulate of Mexico and one Mr. Hoyt Hillenkoetter. Roscoe Henry Hillenkoetter was the first director of the CIA in real life.

The song playing as Diego fights his father is “I’m a Man” by Spencer Davis Group.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 3: The Swedish Job

“The Swedish Job” is likely a reference to the classic ‘60s action film (and its 2003 remake) The Italian Job.

Let’s talk about The Swedes a little more. The Swedes are not present in the Umbrella Academy comic book. They fill a similar role to what Hazel and Cha-Cha do in the second volume of the comic as agents of The Commission (or Temps Aeternalis in the book). But with the show having burned Hazel and Cha-Cha on season 1, it likely needed a replacement here. Most assassins in the Commission are colorful characters so The Swede’s pale weirdness makes enough sense.

“Sunny” by Boney M. plays over the opening montage of Klaus’s time as a cult leader.

Five is tracking soundwaves at Morty’s as that’s a surefire way to find Vanya.

The man holding a “The End is Nigh” sign is certainly an homage to Watchmen. Watchmen was influential for Umbrella Academy writer Gerard Way…and just about everyone else.

The Handler’s outfit as she intimidates a child at a pet shop closely resembles ‘60s fashion popularized by Jackie Onassis Kennedy – fitting given this season’s focus.

Five’s coffee obsession continues apace in this episode.

Klaus meets Dave, the love of his life, at Glenoak’s Hardware. Klaus had previously traveled to the 1960s in season 1 where he joined the Vietnam war effort and fell in love with fellow soldier Dave. Dave obviously has no recollection of it as it hasn’t happened for him yet. Or maybe it never will…time travel is weird.

The song playing at episode’s end is “Golden Brown” by The Stranglers.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 4: The Majestic 12

“The Majestic 12” is a real organization…or purported to be real by conspiracy theorists. It’s said that The Majestic 12 was created by Harry S. Truman in 1947 and made up of scientists, military leaders, and government officials to investigate alien spacecraft. Elliot describes the Majestic 12 as a “shadow government.” Of course Reginald Hargreeves would be a part of it.

The Handler recovered young Lila in London, England in 1993. She appears to be about four years old at that time. If so, that would put her birth year at a very significant…1989.

The music budget this season continues to be insane. The song playing as Klaus falls back into alcoholism and addiction is Styx’s “Renegade.” Obviously.

Luther is enjoying some Texas barbecue when he encounters Allison again. This leads to two relevant points.

Texas barbecue is the best in the country.

With Luther’s increased appreciation for food, The Umbrella Academy season 2 is paying slight homage to the comic’s “Fat Luther” storyline. Following the events of the first comic volume, Luther becomes complacent, depressed, and ultimately, obese. “There’s certainly a nod to that in this season,” Tom Hopper told Den of Geek. “There was a question mark over the fact that Thor did the whole thing already (in Avengers: Endgame.”

Diego meets his mother at the swanky Dallas party. When Diego and his siblings knew “Grace,” she was merely a robot created by Reginald. Here she is a living, breathing woman who knows her date by “Reggie.”

Harlan has a sparrow toy. Make note of this as sparrow imagery pops up a few times this season. Birds are all over The Handler’s clothing choices for instance. That ends up being tremendously relevant to the conclusion of season 2.

Sissy and Vanya share a kiss and then more. Vanya is the second confirmed LGBTQ Umbrella Academy member. “Having that be such a big part of the show and Vanya’s life is exciting for me,” Ellen Page told Den of Geek.

Luther just flat out loves drugs now. After his LSD trip in season 1, he follows that up with nitrous this season. That leads to this hilarious exchange with Elliot:

“My dad died too. He left me on the moon.” *howling, uncontrollable laughter*

The song at episode’s end is “I Was Made For Lovin’ You” by KISS.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 5: Valhalla

The episode’s title is named after “Valhalla,” a majestic hall ruled over by Odin in Asgard in Norse mythology.

Poor Pogo was a space monkey. The United States, U.S.S.R., and France launched dozens of primates into space from 1948 through 1996 (!!!) to test space flight’s effects on humanity’s close cousins. When Pogo’s space flight went poorly, Reginald appears to have resurrected him with a similar serum to which he gave Luther. Is it possible that Luther got gorilla DNA and Pogo got human DNA?

Luther took a bus trip to see his father in the ‘60s. And the map that displays Luther’s trip offers up an interesting clue as to the whereabouts of The Umbrella Academy. The Umbrella Academy is filmed in Toronto though it’s never mentioned what city Toronto is standing in for in the show. In the comics it’s known as only “The City.” Here, Luther’s bus ride seems to end around Indianapolis of all places. It seems as though The Umbrella Academy is in the Midwest.

Ambrosia was a gelatinous fruit salad popular in the ‘60s. It was and is an affront to humanity.

The team’s breakdown of the many ways they could have destroyed the timeline is amusing to say the least:

“Diego has been stalking Lee Harvey Oswald.” – Luther

“You’ve been working for Jack Ruby!” – Diego

“Allison has been very involved in local politics.” – Klaus

“Ok, you started a cult.” – Allison

“I’m just a nanny on a farm. I don’t have anything to do with all of that.” – Vanya

“Face it. The only healthy relationship in this family is when Five was banging that mannequin,” Klaus says. This is a reference to Five’s mannequin lover, Dolores, from his time alone in the post-apocalypse future.

Klaus, Allison, and Vanya dance to Sam Cooke’s “Twistin’ the Night Away.”

The song playing as Five and Lila fight is a ska cover of Billie Eilish’s “Bad Guy” by The Interrupters.

The song playing as the two surviving Swedes consign their fallen brother to Valhalla is a cover of Adele’s “Hello” by Swedish artist My Kullsvik.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 6: A Light Supper

Reginald invites his “pursuers” to 1624 Magnolia Street, Dallas. This address appears to be a parking lot currently.

“So there was a Black president?” Raymond asks Allison of the future. There was indeed, Ray.

“Hold on I’m Coming” by Sam and Dave plays as Allison and Ray have their day out on the town.

“Sixteen years in the grave and you finally turned into your father,” Klaus tells Ben. Given the Hargreeves’s 1989 birth year and 2019 current year of the show, Ben must have been around 14 when he died.

Dave has already signed up for the Army ahead of schedule, suggesting that the Hargreeves’ presence in 1963 really is altering the timeline.

The song playing as the Hargreeves approach their Tiki Lounge meeting is “The Order of Death” by Public Image Ltd.

Ben can now officially inhabit Klaus. This is an evolution of Klaus’s power of being able to communicate with the dead. Robert Sheehan said of this development: “(Klaus) can’t be as selfish anymore because (Ben) has this thing over me that he can do. We have a lot of fun with it and stuff, but it’s kind of about sobriety. I think Klaus and Ben’s relationship is entirely about sobriety versus addiction, for somebody who’s lived with addiction for so long.”

As Five will tell Luther and Diego in episode 7, Öga for Öga is Swedish for “An eye for an eye.”

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 7: Öga for Öga

A candy bar in the vending machine in 1982 Oshkosh, Wisconsin is a “Pogos-Gogos.” Pogo was likely a famous pop culture figure due to his space flight…and ability to speak English.

When Five takes an axe to the Commission executive board in 1982 Wisconsin, it’s hard not to think of American Psycho. Aiden Gallagher is a dead ringer for a young Patrick Bateman.

The song playing as Ben experiences life in Klaus’s body is “Sister of Pearl” by Baio.

We find out the name of Klaus’s cult is “Destiny’s Children.” Klaus is really working his knowledge of ‘90s R&B groups here.

The song playing as Allison battles The Swedes is “Everybody” by Backstreet Boys.

“I heard a rumor you killed your brother,” Allison tells one of the two remaining Swedes. It’s not clear why she assumes that they are brothers. But the fact that the lead Swede follows through means that Allison was correct. Otherwise The Swede would have hopped on a plane to seek out his real brother to kill.

“It was a simple task – just be here! We didn’t have to kill a giant sea serpent, fight off an army of mutants,” Five says of his team’s failure to rendezvous at the right time to escape the ’60s. The “kill a giant sea serpent” could be a reference to a brief moment in the comic’s one-off issue “But the Past Ain’t Through With You.” Sometime in the past, The Umbrella Academy defeated a sea serpent that attacked Japan because it was insulted that a toy-maker make unlicensed plush toys of it.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 8: The Seven Stages

The FBI does have an office in Dallas but it’s about 10 miles away from Dealey Plaza and not directly behind the grassy knoll as depicted here. Or at least that’s what they want you to think…

Vanya is able to reflexively answer the FBI questioner back in Russian because Reginald Hargreeves was a strict teacher of foreign languages to The Umbrella Academy.

Grace finds photos of Fidel Castro, Lyndon B. Johnson, JFK, and a map of his motorcade route in Reggie’s files. This is a clear indication to her that Reggie is involved in an upcoming attempt against the President’s life. Grace also sees plans for a “televator.” This is the elevator teleportation device Reginald will one day build.

There are five stages of grief but apparently seven stages of side effects from confronting one’s self in the same timeline. Five lists them out thusly:

1. Denial

2. Itching

3. Extreme Thirst and Urination

4. Excessive Gas

5. Acute Paranoia

6. Uncontrolled Perspiration

7. Homicidal Rage

As Vanya begins her LSD trip, the song that plays is “Pepper” by Butthole Surfers. Some of the lyrics are particularly apt for this season – “they were all in love with dying, they were doing it in Texas.”

Diego discovers that Vanya will be the cause of the apocalypse yet again in 1963, which makes an argument that The Umbrella Academy operates under Devs-style determinism.

Around the 23-minute mark someone holding a Cha-Cha mask can be seen off in the distance at Commission HQ. The individual’s face can’t be seen but it’s not out of the question that this could be Cha-Cha. Commission assassins appear to age in an unusual manner. Alternatively this could be an assassin who donned the cartoonish helmet before Cha-Cha. Showrunner Steve Blackman says that either interpretation is valid: “In the Commission, it’s always 1963, but it never changes time. So that very well could have been Cha-Cha holding the mask.”

In her LSD nightmare, Vanya is chastised by Reginald for wanting to live “a silly life on a silly farm.” One of the issues of “Dallas” is titled “A Perfect Life” and deals partly with Luther imagining a tranquil domestic life with Allison.

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 9: 743

The episode gets its name from the case number in which Five executed Lila’s parents on The Handler’s orders.

Klaus references Antonio Banderas in complimenting Diego’s hair. Diego is legitimately touched.

Much of this episode takes place in or around Dealey Plaza – the location where John F. Kennedy was assassinated. The sections of note in Dealey Plaza are the book depository where Lee Harvey Oswald fired his rifle from and the grassy knoll where some people believe a second shooter shot JFK. The Umbrella Academy doesn’t make a trip to the book depository but does briefly show the grassy knoll with Reggie Hargreeves and his umbrella. Luther and the two Fives spend most of their time in a parking lot behind the grassy knoll.

Fittingly, the song that plays as young Five fights old Five is “Dancing With Myself” by Billy Idol’s band Generation X.

Much of Vanya’s acid trip is set to Bach’s “Partita No. 2 in D Minor” on violin. There is a lot of violin imagery as well. This is fitting given Vanya’s aptitude for the instrument. She receives the villainess name “White Violin” in the comic series.

“Dad treated you like a bomb before you were one,” Ben tells Vanya. The final issue of The Umbrella Academy Volume 1 is titled “Finale, Or, Brothers and Sisters, I Am an Atomic Bomb.”

Ben also tells Vanya he died “17 years ago” which seems at odds with Klaus’s declaration that Ben died “16 years ago.” Klaus and Ben have been in Dallas for three years though, so Ben died 19-20 years ago, depending on who is right. The year is also 1963 so Ben technically won’t die for another 42 or 43 years. Time travel is weird.

Luther and Young Five send Old Five back to the very start of The Umbrella Academy series, which avoids a truly mind-bending number of paradoxes.

Though it was teased in the show’s first season, Reginald Hargreeves reveals himself to be well and truly an alien in the final moments of this episode. Reggie unzips his skin mask, discards it, and then violently murders his Majestic 12 colleagues at the Tiki Lounge for them killing Kennedy against his wishes. This is a bit of information that the comic book is shockingly upfront about, casually revealing on the series’ second-ever page that Hargreeves is an alien and never addressing it further.

Before they’re slaughtered, the Majestic 12 claim that Reggie has interests on the dark side of the Moon. Perhaps Luther’s trip to the moon wasn’t pointless after all.

The episode concludes with a new song from Umbrella Academy creator and My Chemical Romance frontman Gerard Way called “Here Comes the End.”

The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Episode 10: The End of Something

This is the first time we’ve seen Ben’s funeral. His little casket is covered with squid iconography – a tribute to his power.

The Umbrella Academy are now all suspects in JFK’s death. That’s bound to change the timeline, right? Indeed it probably does based on this episode and the season’s conclusion. It’s also interesting just how inherently suspicious each member of the Umbrella Academy would be to 1963 society. Vanya has an Eastern European-sounding name and can speak Russian. Diego is Cuban. Allison is a Black revolutionary. Luther is an enormous bare-knuckle brawler. Klaus is a cult leader. All intimidating stuff.

The army of Commission goons that The Handler summons to take care of the Umbrella team is full of colorful masks and helmets a la Hazel and Cha-Cha.

On our set visit for The Umbrella Academy season 2, Five actor Aiden Gallagher revealed that several characters would discover “sub-powers” Gallagher said: “I was talking to Steve (Blackman) about this, and how it works is in season one, we sort of get hints about all the characters powers and in season two, we really see more so the extent how far that can go. How different elements of each character’s powers actually means that they have this sub-power.” Diego seems to come across a subpower in this final battle when he appears to be able to stop bullets. Blackman explains the power thusly:

“If you think about Diego’s power, he can, with his mind, control trajectory of objects. Basically he likes throwing, so he can throw his knife and he can make it go in weird, odd curvatures and directions. All of them stopped their training in their adolescence when the family broke up, and they are still learning about their powers and their powers are still evolving. As I go through seasons we’ll see more of that. But moving a knife through the air – an extension of that is then being able to manipulate bullets through the air.”

Speaking of powers, Lila appears to have…well, all of them. Lila displays Vanya’s power, Allison’s power, and Five’s power in fights with each of them. But as Klaus, likely correctly, theorizes later, Lila can only mirror one of their powers at a time. Her ability is mimicry. Diego surmises that this means Lila is one of them – one of the 43 children born on October 1, 1989. That’s why The Handler went out of her way to kill her parents and adopt her.

Allison leaves a letter for Ray in a copy of Jules Verne’s From the Earth to the Moon. A fitting book for the story of The Umbrella Academy and this season.

The song playing during the closing montage is a cover of Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Games” by Parra for Cuva featuring Anna Naklab.

Luther calls Jack Ruby, presumably to convince him not to kill Lee Harvey Oswald. But Jack has already picked up his gun.

Ah, The Sparrow Academy. We delved deep into what the ending of The Umbrella Academy season 2 means over here. For now, know that The Sparrow Academy is likely lifted from Volume 3 of The Umbrella Academy comics, “Hotel Oblivion.” We say “likely” because the team doesn’t have an official name but it does invoke a lot of Sparrow imagery. The Sparrow Academy turns up at the very end of volume “Hotel Oblivion.” In the show, The Sparrow Academy seems to exist in an alternate universe created by The Umbrella Academy’s actions in Dallas. In the comic, it is implied that they are simply seven other extraordinary children born on October 1, 1989. This could prove to be the case in the show as well…save for Ben Hargreeves, who we are obviously already familiar with.

The post The Umbrella Academy Season 2 Complete Easter Egg and Reference Guide appeared first on Den of Geek.

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harryandmolly · 5 years

Text

Ten Years - Part One

summary: ten years after 2007 Warped Tour, Shawn and Val come face to face in London

warnings: Language, that good yearning

WC: 3.3k

A/N: this is a post-epilogue miniseries of I Could Write It Better Than You Ever Felt It. I recommend you read that first or this will make you go 🤔

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Shawn has never felt further from his 19-year-old self than right now, squished into what has to be the world’s tiniest lift with Val and Alice and Alice’s very large, fancy pram.

The rickety lift slowly drags them up to the third floor of the old building. In the mirrored doors, Shawn watches them, saved from Val’s returning gaze as she focuses on making faces at her sleepy baby. Her back is pressed up against his chest. He can smell the achingly familiar citrus scent of her hair. But he can barely recognize the boy that ran away from this girl.

The lift stops with an alarming little jolt but Val looks unbothered. She hands the pram off to Shawn to steer while she fishes keys out of her purse. Shawn walks slowly, gazing down at Alice’s round and curious face. Who are you to be taking up my mommy’s attention? She seems to say. Shawn’s lower lip twitches. Who, indeed.

Val lets them into the dark flat. It’s roomier than Shawn expected, having seen the modest building from the outside. As Val flips on lights, Shawn’s hungry eyes suck in as much as they can, committing it to memory for further study.

The walls are a rich shade of deep, deep red. The furniture is modern but comfortable. There are bookshelves in every corner, packed full of fantasy, art texts and music biographies. He stumbles over a stuffed colorful caterpillar toy. It makes Val chuckle.

He looks up at her and watches as she drops her jacket onto a hanger and kicks her boots into a corner next to a teeny tiny pair of cleats that make him smile.

“Already got her on a club team?” he rasps, finding his voice has failed him slightly. Val graciously ignores it and glances over at the cleats.

“Aren’t those hilarious? Raf sent those for her a few weeks ago. They were his daughter’s when she was Alice’s size.”

Shawn smiles and tucks his hands into his jacket pockets, rocking back and forth. He’s gazing around, memorizing as casually as possible, when he feels her warmth again. He looks down to see her smirking up at him. He ducks his head and chuckles. There never was any hiding from Val.

“Wanna stay for dinner? I was going to order takeaway.”

He grins at her British -ism and bites into his lower lip, nodding at her fridge. “I can cook if you want.”

Val’s eyebrows lift. Shawn’s laugh is low and gravelly. His voice is still not working quite right. He thinks it’s prolonged exposure to her coming out of nowhere. He doesn’t really mind. She could always understand exactly what he was saying even when he was babbling helplessly, even when he wasn’t speaking at all.

“You can… cook?”

Shawn rolls his eyes and shucks off his jacket, placing it on the back of a barstool at her modest kitchen island.

“I did grow up a little in the last ten years,” he sighs, wandering into her kitchen curiously.

“I noticed.”

Shawn freezes almost comically. His hand is halfway to the fridge handle. He blinks and turns his head slightly to look at her. She’s wearing the smile that’s haunted him for ten years, the one that’s so signature Val -- it’s a dare and a promise all in one. He swallows so hard his throat visibly bobs.

She’s fucking flirting with him. And she doesn’t look like she did it accidentally.

His motor function comes back enough to open the refrigerator and look around, and also hope the cool air will reduce the pink burning in his cheeks. Val busies herself with freeing fussy Alice from the pram, holding her against her hip after shedding all her tiny little layers down to a pair of leggings and a long sleeved tee with the Arsenal FC logo on it.

Shawn studies the contents of the fridge. It doesn’t take long. He looks up at her, frowning disapprovingly.

“You don’t cook,” he says plainly.

Val snorts, which makes Alice wriggle against her chest.

“I don’t cook. Never have, never will. It horrifies my mother, who sends five pounds of frozen homemade empanadas every month packed with dry ice.”

Shawn groans and lets his head loll back. “Fuck, I love your mom’s empanadas.”

A moment later, his head snaps up. His eyes widen. He claps a hand over his mouth.

“I’m so sorry!” The sound is garbled against the skin of his hand. He removes it to Val’s amusement.

“Don’t worry,” Val hums, pressing her nose and lips up against Alice’s patch of dark hair above her little ear, “I swear around her all the fucking time. Don’t I, nina?”

Shawn grins and turns back to the fridge. With a sigh, he unloads a carton of old Waitrose eggs, some wilted spinach and a bag of shiitake mushrooms. He snuggles the ingredients into his arms and nudges the door shut with his foot, glancing at her reproachfully.

“Don’t judge me on this, it won’t be my best work. But I have limited resources.”

Val takes a deep, calming breath, watching him start to sort out a cutting board and a pathetically dull knife at her kitchen counter. Because Shawn Mendes is cooking her dinner.

It’s been a weird six hours.

Val props herself up on a stool, planting Alice in front of her, holding her by the waist so her floppy, energetic baby doesn’t squirm onto the floor. Alice also serves as an excellent shield between herself and the man in her kitchen she can’t stop staring at.

She listens to him chop and crack eggs and melt butter like making dinner for her is some kind of Food Network challenge. She tries to tamp down a goofy smile at the thought. Alice smacks her tiny palm against Val’s lips for her attention. She holds her daughter’s hand and mimes nibbling at her fingers, making Alice squeal with laughter. Val peeks over Alice’s shoulder to see Shawn grinning at a frying pan, expertly flipping an omelette. Val’s stomach flips with it.

“So,” Val coughs, “How’ve you found London so far?”

Shawn slides the omelette sizzling onto a plate and cracks pepper over the top. He slides it over to her with a fork, slinging a dish towel over his shoulder while he gets to work on the second. Val mouths thank you, sealing it with a wink as she lifts the baby into a high chair and pops open a can of mashed carrot and swede from the countertop.

“I love it,” Shawn murmurs, nodding, “I’ve always really liked it here. My mum has family here. I’m over here a lot for work.”

He slides his tongue over his lower lip, making the black enameled ring quiver as he thinks about the comment he left out -- he’s long been considering getting a place here. Many of his favorite producers are based out of London. He and the guys love working out here. Forefront has remained more popular in the UK after the scene faded in the US. It makes sense.

“And… how long are you staying?”

Val hopes the eagerness doesn’t cut too deeply into her voice. If Shawn notices, he’s mercifully cool about it.

“I’m leaving Thursday to go home for the holidays.”

Val’s jaw tightens. She straightens up and stares at Alice, watching as she takes a fist of Val’s hair and shoves it into her mouth instead of the spoon of food Val is offering.

“I’ll be back after New Years to write the new album. Gonna spend a few months here.”

Val’s stomach swoops. She jams the spoon into Alice’s cheek by accident, reaching for her bib to wipe the food away before Alice can protest.

“That’s nice,” Val replies airily.

Shawn plops into the stool next to her with his plate and eyes her as she takes one bite of her food and feeds her daughter with her other hand.

“Ever accidentally mixed up the spoons and eaten baby food by mistake?”

Val barks a laugh. “Happens like, once a week.”

Shawn, Val and Alice eat in comfortable silence. Shawn chews a little slower than usual because he knows he’s probably getting kicked out after dinner and he’s not really ready to let go of this just yet.

This.

What is this?

Shawn shakes the thought before it can sprout in his brain. He’s not going to freak out over this. This is fine. It’s dinner with an old friend and her baby. Nothing weird can happen with a baby around, right?

Val stands and scoops a squirming Alice out of her high chair, walking toward the nursery with a glance over her shoulder.

“I’m gonna get her changed and put her down for the night. Want to open that bottle of wine there?” She nods at a bottle of cabernet and Shawn’s eyes get a little brighter.

“Yeah,” he responds enthusiastically, nodding, “Good night, Alice!”

Val beams and flaps Alice’s little hand at him. “Night night, Shawn!”

When Val emerges twenty minutes later with the baby monitor, Shawn has the dishes cleaned and the wine breathing with two glasses out on the counter while he flips absently through his phone.

“I’m gonna get changed, too,” Val says softly, gesturing down at her leather pants and chewing on the inside of her lip, trying not to read too much into all the different cozy-cute outfit ideas in her head.

Before she can overthink it, she swaps out her urban mom chic look for clingy charcoal leggings and a black camisole with her favorite cable knit cardigan over top. She gives her hair a flip in the mirror and pinches some color into her cheeks.

You know, just because.

When she walks back into the living room, Shawn has the wine poured. She tips her glass against his and murmurs “cheers,” willfully ignoring the way Shawn is trying not to check her out.

They sit at the bar. Shawn watches Val cross her long, slender legs, her bare, black-lacquered toes glinting up at him. He hums a chuckle and sips his wine.

“What?” she giggles.

He nods at her. “You. Your black nail polish. Some things never change, I guess.”

The words feel heavy as soon as they leave him. It swirls around them, all that has changed, all that hasn’t.

It would be easy to look over at Val now and see a stranger. It’s been a full decade. The amount of life experience packed into the ten years between 22 and 32 could have made her an entirely different person. But Shawn’s been watching her, listening to her all day. She’s still Val.

It’s a comfort and a curse, he thinks. It’s not like he hasn’t wondered about her, about how much the years have changed all the things that drew him in. It hurt to think she was changing and he didn’t even know it, couldn’t see it. And now he knows just how… Val she still is.

This night won’t last forever, even if they did just open a nice bottle of wine. He’ll go back to the hotel, he’ll leave London. He’ll be stuck with knowing the woman he loved is still every bit as incredible as he remembers her. Hell, she got better. He can’t believe it, but Val Moreno got better with time.

He shakes his head and pushes a hand through his hair. “Wow,” he mutters.

Val takes a gulp from her glass and nods. “I’m kind of feeling that, too.”

“It’s just…” Shawn hisses, finally cracking with the help of the fine cabernet, “It’s been… ten fucking years.”

Val looks over at him. She’s silent for a few long, slow seconds.

“So tell me about them.”

Shawn looks at her as she stands and reaches for the bottle and her glass, heading for the couch.

“Didn’t we do that all afternoon?” he laughs, standing and ambling after her.

Hey moron, he thinks to himself, Do you really want to give her a reason to make you leave sooner than you have to?

To his relief, Val persists, swinging her legs up to fold beside her and patting the cushions. He settles in and continues sipping from his glass for courage.

“Well,” she starts, looking a bit uncertain as she gazes into her glass, “If your ten years has been anything like mine, you have a list of things you’ve been wanting to tell me, saving up for if we’d ever see each other again.”

Shawn’s fucking fingers tingle. She’s been making a list. For him.

He nods. “Y-yeah. I mean… yeah.”

Val smiles. It’s soft and encouraging. “Ok. I’ll start.”

Shawn’s heart softens its battering ram motion in his chest. He bobs his head.

“I was… so scared when I got pregnant with Alice. God, it was the most frightened I’ve ever been of anything. More scared than when I told Raf I was leaving Streets, even more scared than when I was pregnant with Rafael. Because I felt so ready this time. If she was taken from me… god, I swear to god, I held my breath the entire nine months with her. Even after she was born, I just stared at her. Like if I blinked, that would be it. She’d be gone. I think it’s only in the last six months that I’ve started to fucking relax.”

Shawn’s body surges with affection and protective instincts he barely recognizes. He nods eagerly.

“I think it’s amazing you decided to do it on your own. I mean, I bet you hear that all the time. But…”

“But you know better than most how much of a risk I felt I was taking,” she says softly, leveling him with her gaze.

Shawn is quiet remembering the night she finally released it into him, a flood of words he was too young to hear, to feel, to accept. It was the night they said ‘I love you.’ It was the night he ran.

“Your turn,” Val whispers, refilling their glasses. Shawn drinks eagerly.

“Uhm… I… fuck. The closest I ever came to calling you was six years ago, after Making Midnight. I felt like shit. I think I knew all along it wasn’t right -- none of it. It wasn’t me, it wasn’t us. It was a bad album. I had no business being as pissed as I was that it sucked and everyone hated it. But I was so angry with myself. I just felt powerless. It took me so long to be ok with speaking up and saying when I thought something was wrong. It took me so long to find a way to be a leader. I think that’s the way I’ve changed the most in the last ten years.”

Val watches him thoughtfully. She takes a short sip and shakes her head.

“Maybe that’s one of the ways. I’m not sure it’s the biggest. I think 19-year-old you wouldn’t have lasted through a walk in the park with me and my kid. 29-year-old you held her for over an hour. I think you fell a little bit in love with her.”

She chuckles but she’s not joking. Shawn goes crimson.

“She’s… god, Val, she’s amazing. You’re so lucky. You… you both are.”

Val’s eyes drift shut. She drains her second glass. When she opens her eyes again, Shawn’s warm honeyed eyes are watching her. He doesn’t look scared. He doesn’t look anxious. He looks a little lonely.

Val fills their glasses again. She’s warm enough now to slip out of her cardigan and leave it beside her on the sofa. She watches Shawn watch her toss her hair over her shoulders. He chews on his lip until it’s red and swollen.

“Say it.”

He looks up from his already half empty third glass. He blinks quickly. “What?”

“Say it, whatever it is.”

Her voice is calm and smooth. He swallows.

“I was just… wondering if you’ve been in love in the last ten years.”

Val’s head tilts. “Honestly? I didn’t really try. I didn’t want to be. I just wanted Alice. Even before I was ready for her, though, I wasn’t all that interested in looking around. I guess I figured it would fall into my lap when it was right.”

“Why didn’t you look?” Shawn asks, a little too quickly.

Val notices. She takes a slow, deep breath. Shawn watches it inflate and deflate her chest as his tightens. With a resigned smile, Val reaches out and cups his cheek. Her whole body is warm, humming with alcohol in her veins. Her fingers have him choking down a gasp.

“Do you know what I think is really the most incredible part?” she breathes. He blinks at her again, dumbstruck.

“We were together less than three months. It was Warped Tour. We were… fuck, we were kids. I never expected that I’d be hung up on it after all this time. That years later, I’d be on dates and thinking of you. That I’d be sleeping with other people and still thinking of you. I thought this is something that would fade. When I saw you in the garden today, it felt exactly the same as waking up next to you in my bunk on that stupid tour bus, like it was 2007 all over again.”

Shawn’s eyes have fallen shut. He’s overwhelmed, breathing heavily. He turns his face to nudge his lips against her thumb, leaving a gentle kiss.

“God, I still write songs about you. Like, all the time. I thought I was crazy. Maybe I am. I don’t know. Maybe we both are.”

Val waits a beat, then drags his lips to hers. Her kiss is firm but sweet. Her face softens as soon as his mouth touches hers. His fingers curls into the ends of her hair as he edges closer, carefully, dropping himself headfirst into the kiss because who knows if he’ll get another.

They break apart, panting for air. Val plants her hands on his shoulders and wastes no time hauling herself into his lap.

Shawn whimpers, gasping into her mouth. She feels… perfect. Fuck, he’s on fire. It’s been so long. Her tongue slips against his, she groans into his mouth. Her arms are slung around his neck so all he can see and hear and feel is her. How did he go without this for so long? How did he let her go? How could he leave?

But he knows why he left. He left because he was a kid. It took every ounce of strength and maturity he had to walk away when he let himself realize it. He left for him.

Shawn inhales deeply and scoops his hands around her cheeks, easing her back gently. Val’s eyes are heavy. She’s panting.

“Wait… wait,” he grunts, shaking his head as he breathes heavily, in synch with her, “It can’t be like this this time.”

Val feels his words snapping into place in her head. She looks down at the baby monitor she dropped next to her sweater. She lets her head fall forward as she laughs breathlessly.

“Ok. Add that to the list of things you wouldn’t have done ten years ago.”

Shawn grins and tugs her forward until her head rests against his shoulder and his arms drape around her back.

“You deserve so much better than what I gave you last time,” he says softly. It’s not pained or self-deprecating, it’s simple and honest. “I want it to be real.”

She turns her lips against his neck and sighs. The same scurry of goosebumps she remembers she always left on him marches across his skin.

“Then let’s talk about it in the morning,” Val murmurs. Carefully, she unfolds her body from his, takes his hand, and leads the way to her bedroom.

-----------

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