#basically. stuck. in an awful situation. with no way out <3 awesome

[crowcryptid]

Got home at 7:30…… yippie..

I love traffic.

[yoichichi]

HQ boys with a sick s/o HC

warning(s): none :)

a/n: my poor ❣️ anon is sick and these were inspired by our last convo, I hope you’re feeling better Angel 😭 please enjoy some hq dummies and how theyd treat a sick s/o :) <3

characters: Tsukishima, Hinata, Sugawara, Daichi, Noya, Aran, Kita, Bokuto, Kenma, Ushijima, & Aone

Tsukishima

He would act bothered at the fact you’re sick, cause of course you’re gonna ask your boyfriend for things - like any notes you might’ve missed that day. But judging how he just does your homework for you you’re pretty sure he’s not actually mad.

He’d also be bugging you about taking your medicine cause he needs you to get better fast so he isn’t “stuck bullying only Hinata”, he misses picking on you too and he says it’s funner in person

He’s kind of worried about getting sick himself so he wouldn’t see you in person much but you definitely notice how frequent he’s starting to call you, he even FaceTimed you while he was at the grocery store cause you weren’t there with him to pick out your snacks. (He knows your favs at this point, he just missed your company)

The moment you’re better and he has a chance to see you he’s a bit more physically affectionate than normal - not that either of you are complaining - he missed you very much :(

Daichi

His hearts in the right place - like he’s brought some cough drops and water and such and has this whole plan for you to get better but the moment you sneeze a little too hard he’s so :((((( and just wants to hold you and coddle you.

So he does exactly that.

It can be a bit overbearing at first cause he’s VERY adamant on you not doing thing, like he’s debating on whether or not you should even be allowed to walk to the bathroom and if he should be carrying you there instead.

Rather than catch you up on anything you missed (he’ll bother suga about it later) he’d prefers snuggling in and napping the day away with you and just hopes you’ll magically get better.

Hinata

The overly worried type who’s also somehow simultaneously oblivious.

He’s CONSTANTLY checking in like are you better yet? Can you stand? Have you been throwing up all day? Is your temp still too high?? Please call me if you need anything :((((

But then he comes over with his volleyball and is all raring to go on some walk with you cause he found this awesome little trail that has some cute clearing he thinks you’d love but he seems to have forgotten you’re kind of currently bedridden.

You tell him and almost feel bad cause you can see the disappointment on his face and the way his body kind of deflates, but then all of a sudden he’s cheering back up cause he realizes that means he gets to lay with you basically all day and love up on you (regardless of your protests telling him he’d get sick too - which he definitely does)

Sugawara

I hope you wanted some tough love :(

Don’t get me wrong, he’s all about taking care of his baby but don’t think you’re gonna be milking any extra pity out of him 😭

He’s bringing you all the right medicine and extra love and any snacks you need, but he’s also bringing any schoolwork you might be missing and he’s reminding you of those deadlines.

He makes up for it with the extra study guides he made you so you can understand the material easier, and the cute little drawings he puts in the margins to better explain the material

He feels awful for his sick baby but isn’t gonna let you fall behind <3

Noya

Really believes in the whole laughter is the best medicine type shit. He’d also be looking up all different kinds of ways to make you better if he felt like you weren’t having a speedy recovery AHSJSJAJS

“I don’t know babe I’m jus sayin, this here says that if you drink raw egg whites and vinegar it’s a good immune system boost and will cure your flu in, like, 15 minutes. It might be worth a shot!”

Baby boy just misses going on dates with you 😭

Also tends to go overboard sometimes with the movies - last time you were sick he brought a whole cardboard box full of random dvds he had lying around as well as a couple of home videos of him as a child ‘cause:

“I’m hilarious babe look at these!”

Aran

Literally one of the best boyfriends you could ask for in this situation are you joking? He never hovers too much but is always just a phone call away if you need some help or are just feeling too lonely :( KING of making soups are you joking (firm believer that warm foods are the best thing when you’re ill) he definitely texts you random things throughout the day like

“how’s my baby doing?”

Or

“u feeling ok enough for me to stop by later ?❤️”

Expect LOTS of forehead kisses too

Also tends to hold the back of his hands to your face a lot so he can check your temp throughout the day, a true caregiver :,(

Kita

Ok him and Aran are tied cause this man 😪

The moment he finds out you’re sick he’s gotta know what kind of bug you caught cause he will be bringing you medicine the moment he can and he needs to be sure he’s getting the right kind. Also the type to buy you some silly little card that his grandmother INSISTED on signing (she’s very worried about you) and who is he to say no to that.

He also would hate to admit this to you but he thinks you’re so cute when you’re sick 😭 it doesn’t matter if you���re hacking up yesterday’s lunch he’s like 🥺🤲🏼 my poor little baby

He also just really likes taking care of you, definitely fits into his love language and it just feels very domestic for him to be by your side and aiding you in any way you can, and this mf is the biggest fan of the domestic things in your relationship <3

Bokuto

Honestly a little excited cause he gets to spend some uninterrupted alone time with you

Like don’t get me wrong he’s sad your sick but he can’t help but think to himself omg I get to spend the whole day with my baby! Just me and them!

Really helpful though, like you almost forget you’re sick. He’s making you food if you can’t do it yourself and he’s making sure you’re taking your medicine at the right times all while just chilling and talking with you in between! You guys watch some awful movies and laugh at them and it almost feels like a good ol date night in with your boyfriend if your body wasn’t so fatigued and sore from being sick. But don’t worry, cause Bokuto is there and ready to rub those sore muscles at any given moment.

Kenma

He just kind of shows up? Unannounced?

He has a weeks worth of stuff packed as well as a game console and a sack full of games LMAO and he just sets them down and gives you a kiss on the forehead and just ,, starts,, unpacking. You have to ask him what he’s doing cause he’s just not saying anything.

“You’re sick, so I’m staying over to take care of you until you feel better, duh. Now which side of the bed do you prefer?”

This man is casually waiting on your every need like your thirsty? Lay tf down he’s getting it for you. Hungry? Funny, he already ordered in. You’re his mf princess and you’re sick so you will not be moving a muscle.

Ushijima

MASSAGES. Massages. And cuddles :(((

Big man Ushi comes over when he has the chance with some painkillers and his big warm arms. Most of the time he’s over you guys are just napping cause he wants to hold you! Cause you look so helpless and sick and of course you guys are laying down so you guys just kind of pass out.

Also a big check in texter to see if you’re feeling up for him to be over later that day.

If you are too worried about getting him sick he’ll stay home but he’ll be kind of grumpy about it. You’d get a random FaceTime from him just for him to move his phone away from his body enough to emphasize how empty his bed is 🙄

You cave and let him come over, and when he does he just huffs and crawls into bed with you like ☹️ c’mere

Aone

Omg the biggest worrier of all of them :((((

The one most likely to say he’s sick too so he can free any responsibilities of the day just so he can come take care of you in person. Something about the idea of you being home alone and sick with no one there to make sure you’re ok hurts his heart so bad.

He also would forget to let you know he’s coming over though, so when he comes into your apartment with his copy of the key and finds you under a heap of covers with a tissue box on your nightstand he’s quickly getting under the covers with you and pulling you into his chest.

You wake up an hour or two later to feel big warm arms embracing you and you know your sweet boyfriend came over just to check on you. And judging by his heavy breaths signaling he was asleep you knew he had to have been here for a while <3

———————

ugh it’s been too long since I’ve written for hq! I hope you guys enjoyed and I always love to hear your thoughts :) <3

requests are open

-🐇out

taglist: @plutowrites @sweet-darling91 (if you’d like to be added to hq, aot, mha, or a combination of those lemme know!)

[ofhoneyandrosepetals]

Summer Roads - Chapter 5

Pairing: Sean x Fem! reader

Description: You’ve always been Lyla’s best friend, but since Sean moved you became an inseparable trio. But who could say that, after all these years together, you would start growing feelings for Sean?

Warning: swearings only.

Word count: 2,207

A/N: it just came to me that I never put Chapter 4 in my masterlist, but that error is already corrected! Have fun <3

You woke up with the sunlight on your face, making your eyelids tremble. The first thing you noticed was that Sean’s sleeping bag was empty. Lyla was still asleep. Once you get up you head for the kitchen, where the smell of toasts and coffee filled the air. Lyla’s mom had a cup of steaming coffee on her hands as she talked with Sean, who devoured the toasts.

“Wasn’t the night chilly?” Lyla’s mom asked.

“It was alright, the sleeping bags are warm,” Sean answered, a toast midway to his mouth when he saw you. “Ah, you up.”

“Good morning, Y/N,” Yu-jin said. “Make yourself at home, of course,” she gestured for the kitchen, meaning that you could serve yourself as you pleased.

“I sure did that,” Sean mumbled, mouth full of toast.

“Don’t do that, Sean,” you whispered at him, meaning his lack of manners in front of Lyla’s mom.

“Well, I’ll leave you two alone. If you need anything, I’ll be upstairs.”

“Okay, thanks,” you and Sean said at the same time.

“Plans for today?” The boy asked you. You shrugged.

“I don’t know, I guess Lyla actually made a list of things she wanted us to do, but I don’t know what’s there and I’m a bit afraid to ask.”

“She’ll probably keep us busy the whole summer.”

You took notice of Sean’s hands as he cleaned the crumbles of toast from the counter. His index finger was still coloured from the spray paint. You looked at your own, still pink.

“Oh, don’t worry about it, one shower and it’s clean,” you heard Sean saying about the spray paint.

“I’m not worried about that.”

“What is it, then? That troubles you? I know there’s something, you’ve been acting all weird yesterday, zoning out and whatever.”

You could never, not in a thousand years, tell Sean what really troubled you, so you decided to lie, which wasn’t much of an easy decision - you hated lying. But in that situation it was perfectly acceptable. 

“It’s just my brother,” you said with a wave of your hand, as if dismissing the subject. “I don’t think he’s coming this summer and, well, that kinda sucks.”

“Oh,” Sean raised his eyebrows. “That’s awful, yeah. Why do you think he’s not coming? He didn’t say anything yet?”

“Yep.”

“Don’t worry about it, Y/N,” Sean got up from the stool he was sitting on. “I’m sure he will come,” and Sean hugged you.

It wasn’t supposed to be or to feel weird, since you always hugged Sean, but now it was a delicate situation, since you weren't looking at him with the same eyes. You tried to think as fast as you could to relax your body and hug him back, passing your arms around him. The texture of the fabric of his shirt felt soft under your fingertips. You hugged him tight.

“Thanks,” it was all you could manage.

“Hey, hey - don’t get all sentimental,” Sean tapped your shoulders, a little smile on his face. “You know I’m always willing to trade Daniel.”

That comment made you laugh out loud. “I’d love to keep Daniel just for me for a couple days. We would play so much you’d be jealous!”

“You don’t need to play with Daniel to get me jealous.”

The volume of his voice was so low that at first you doubted he even said anything. Sean was going out through the back door, so you couldn’t ask him if he’d say anything, and those words stuck to your brain like glue.

*

In the end, Lyla’s mom needed her to help clean the house, so the second day of summer vacation wasn’t going to be spent by the three of you together. Sean asked if you wanted to go over his house and kill some time, but you were so scared of spending time alone with him that you declined.

“Dude, you can’t be sad over something you don’t even know it’s gonna happen,” he said, sounding worried.

“I know, I know, but I need to clean my room, you saw how the situation is.”

“Your room is not even slightly different from what it usually is.”

“Ouch,” you mimicked a stake going through your heart.

“Silly,” Sean said as he shook his head. “Well, if you feel like doing something, anything, don’t hesitate to hit me up.”

“You got it, boss,” you saluted him and jogged to your house without looking back.

What you didn’t know was that Sean was the one who actually looked back.

*

Of course you didn’t clean your room - not because you didn’t think it wasn’t necessary, because it clearly was, but simply because you were the type of person who never cleared their rooms. Simple as that. Instead, you spent the rest of the morning and the afternoon eating chips, watching TV and occasionally flipping a comic - doing whatever that came to you was the very key of keeping Sean out of your mind.

Your mom was at work, so when the bell rang it was up to you to go and open the door - checking before who it was, of course.

Your heart beat increased what it felt like a thousand percent. 

Sean was at your front door.

Keep it cool, keep it cool, you kept repeating to yourself in thoughts as you opened the door to see the whole Diaz family.

“Hi, Y/N!” Greeted an excited Daniel, a Power Bear doll on his left hand as he waved his right one.

“Hello, Diaz. What can I do for you?” You propped one shoulder against the doorframe, trying to look cool and relaxed, and not someone who would probably pop and fly high into the sky.

“Your mom called my dad to say that she’s going to be back home late, so you’re supposed to have dinner with us.”

“And I asked dad if we could get some pizza, since it’s summer vacation!” Daniel was excited as far as a 7 year old could get - meaning: at full speed.

“Why didn’t she tell me that?” You asked. “I knew nothing about it.”

Sean only shrugged.

“Go put on some shoes, Y/N.”

“Is it dinner time already?” You looked behind you, at the clock hanging in the kitchen wall.

“Y/N, shooooooooes,” Sean begged. “I’m starving.”

“Okay, okay, gimme a sec,” you raised your palms and, leaving the front door open so the Diaz family could come in, you went for your room to quickly change your clothes and put on some shoes.

Once you stepped outside your bedroom, Daniel went directly towards you, pretending that his toy was flying, circling around you.

“Let’s go let’s go let’s go!”

“Isn’t Lyla coming?” You asked Sean.

“I called her, but she said she would stay home tonight.”

“Stay home tonight?” That sentence was odd, coming from Lyla. “Is she alright?”

“She seemed fine - I guess she’s just tired from all the cleaning up. A thing you ended up not doing, right?” Sean flicked a look at your room, your door cracked open. You shrugged, embarrassed. “Please tell me you didn’t get your ass all sad the whole day.”

“I didn’t!” You assured him. “I just watched TV and read some comics.”

“Y/N,” Sean said as you locked the front door - Esteban and Daniel were already in the car, waiting for you. “You don’t need to lie to me, you do know that, right? I’d never judge you.”

“I didn’t lie to you,” you quickly grabbed the key back and tossed it in your jeans pocket. Sean narrowed his eyes.

“Well, my message was received. I hope you listen to it.”

“I did. I will,” you shook your head, confused. “Whatever, Diaz. Let’s go.”

Sean smiled and went to open the car door for you. Your heart skipped a bit and you had to take a deep, silent breath to recover yourself.

*

Daniel seemed to command the whole show - he chose the table, he demanded to sit beside you and he also had a pick on one of the pizza toppings. Sean heavily sighed most of the time, especially when Daniel basically screamed that he’d be the one to sit by your side. Sean sat across you and you tried to look as what you thought you always did.

You wanted to be and act normal around him after the new discovery of your feelings, but it was hard to do so - you always had the idea that Sean might pick up on the hints, that he would discover somehow and, consequently, step back and not be your friend anymore.

You two agreed on pepperoni topping.

“Aww, pepperoni is awful,” Daniel complained.

“What are you whining about? You chose your own topping, Daniel,” Sean said.

“I know, but I want Y/N to eat my pizza too.”

“I’ll eat whatever’s on the table, Dani,” you told him.

“Just don’t eat the napkins,” Esteban said.

“They’re paper napkins, I think they’re edible enough,” you said.

“Ewww,” the Diaz brothers expressed at the same time, making you and Esteban laugh at them.

Dinner with the Diaz was always a fun thing - you loved to see Daniel picking at Sean and the boy getting angry, but not really angry -, so tonight was no exception. Daniel snorted soda through his nose, making you and Sean laugh like two idiots while Esteban tried to pose as a “father who had control over his children,” even though he was holding his own laugh. It was easy to forget that Sean had changed over your eyes, and as soon as that thought occurred to you, the feelings all came back in a flow.

Esteban dropped you at your house, Daniel waving and screaming bye to you until you stepped inside the living room. Your mom was in the kitchen snacking on something. “Hey,” she said. “Had fun tonight?”

“Yeah,” you said giggling, remembering some of the hilarious things that could happen in a pizza restaurant.

“You seem different, sweetie.”

You stood still.

“Different how?”

“I don’t know, just… different. I guess tonight was fun for you. Oh, I almost forgot.”

But different how?, you thought. Am I looking too tortured or what?

“Your brother called - he’s coming next week.”

Those news enlightened you in a whole new way that you didn’t think was possible. Your brother here meant that you could take your mind off of what’s troubling you, besides the fact that you could always count on your brother for advice - especially the kind you needed.

“That’s awesome!” You shouted and your mom smiled. “Oh, I’ve been waiting for that call. I gotta tell the others! Lyla needs to update her to-do list.”

You ran to your room, opening your laptop and checking if both your best friends were online. They happened to be. You immediately called them.

“Wadduuuup,” Lyla said as soon as all of you were on the call.

“Is it an emergency? I just dropped Y/N at her house,” Sean said and you could hear Daniel’s loud voice in the background.

“I think Daniel had too much soda,” you said.

“Daniel’s excited about something at his friend’s house this weekend - I don’t intend to find out what it is.”

“Well, I happen to have great news,” you said, placing your hand on your chest.

“How great are we talking about?” Lyla asked.

“The kind of great that will require an update to your to-do list,” you answered.

“Oh, that only means one thing,” Sean said.

“Your brother’s coming!” Lyla jumped on her chair. “That’s so awesome!”

If you loved your brother that much, just imagine your friends - he felt like an older brother to all of them as well.

“Okay, I’ll see where I can include mr. Peter and think of new things we can do.”

“Now that Y/N just told us the news, are you two down for some gaming?” Sean suggested.

“Sorry, Seanie, I’m tired of all the cleaning, I don’t think I can function well enough to play through the night.”

“Yeah, me neither,” you said.

“What did you do the whole day to feel tired?” Sean asked, suspicious.

“I just wanna go to bed early, that’s all,” you shrugged off.

“Sometimes it sucks being the only guy in this group.”

“This has nothing to do with you being a boy,” you stated.

“He knows that, he just likes to be a drama queen,” Lyla said. “Well, I’m off. Kisses and hugs,” and Lyla went offline.

“I’m going too,” you said.

“Yeah, I know,” Sean rolled his eyes.

“Just play with Daniel,” you teased him.

“Oh, no way. He’s too on, I don’t wanna increase the situation.”

“Good luck with the goofball. Good night, Sean.”

“Good night, Y/N.”

You finally went to bed, staring at your ceiling, a swirl of thoughts running through your mind. Sean’s phrase at the Park’s kitchen earlier that day came back to you, making your heart go wild. “You don’t need to play with Daniel to get me jealous.”

It’s nothing, it’s nothing, it means anything, it’s nothing, you repeat it like a mantra until you fall asleep, having a dreamless sleep.

A/N: please let me know if you wanna be tagged in the future chapters so you’ll always know when the fic is updated!

[riversofmars]

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! Hope you had a good start to the new year, hopefully 2021 will be a good one. I just want to keep doing the things that make me happy, so starting the year of with a new chapter seems just about right! 

Also, massive thank you to @manyotherroadsyettorun @capybaraonabicycle and @ms-flyology for creating awesome content for this fic? I’m in awe!

Rating: M

Word-count: 3600

Chapter 3: Rules of Engagement

The Emperor threw her knife and missed the Doctor’s head by less than an inch. She laughed at how the Doctor flinched away and braced herself against the floor. She winced in pain, the wound on her shoulder was throbbing.

“Right, where were we.“ The Emperor turned back to River with a smirk and pulled her close.

The Doctor sat back on her knees, struggling for composure, breathing through the pain. She watched for a moment, relieved to not be the centre of attention anymore. She couldn’t help the wave of jealously she was feeling. She knew this wasn’t her River but the physical attraction didn’t just go away. 

River moaned when the Emperor pushed her hand between her legs and the Doctor looked away, she couldn’t bare it. That’s when her eyes fell on the knife she had pulled from her shoulder and she realise she had a chance here. Every fibre of her being revolted against the use of weapons but in this universe, the dice were weighted, the rules were different, and she couldn’t be sure she would get an opportunity like this again. They underestimated her, they thought they could play games with her, this was her chance. Carefully she inched forward and closed her shaking hand around the hilt of the knife. The Emperor had turned her back on her. Stabbing someone in the back was the definition of cowardice but this was a desperate situation, and if she was the same as her in every way, she would just regenerate wouldn’t she? And keep them preoccupied long enough for her to escape?

The Doctor was swift about it and pushed herself up but she hesitated. Second thoughts stalling her movements. She knew nothing of her history, what if they weren’t quite the same and she did kill her? Her hesitation lasted only for a moment but long enough. Long enough for River to pull her wife around and out of the way. She grab the Doctor’s wrist with one hand before she’d even raised the knife, and went straight for her throat with the other.

“And what do you think you’re doing with that, darling?“ River purred twisting the Doctor’s wrist and bending her arm. The Doctor winced and dropped the knife.

“Looks like I underestimated you after all.“ The Emperor smirked intrigued.

“You didn’t.“ River shook her head without looking around, she kept her gaze firmly fixed on the Doctor, searching her eyes.

“No?“ The Emperor raised her eyebrows.

“She hesitated.“ River said simply. “She wouldn’t have followed through anyway. Hasn’t got it in her. Such a shame.“

The Doctor didn’t know what to respond to that. Usually she would have taken great pride in that but now it put her at a great disadvantage indeed. She was, however, struggling to think straight. River was half naked, pressed right up against her curling her slender fingers around her throat, just hard enough to make her breathless.

“You know, it’s the death penalty for raising a finger against the crown.“ River hummed.

“You’re not going to kill me though, are you, you need me.“ The Doctor managed to say, far more calmly than she was feeling on the inside. Her head was spinning.

“Oh there are plenty of other things I could do to you.“ River smirked with a dangerous flicker in her eyes. She let go of the Doctor’s wrist and move her hand to the button on her trousers. The Doctor tried to pull away but River held her tightly, squeezing her neck a little harder.

“Enough of this.“ The Emperor huffed. “Let her go.“

“But darling, we could…“

“Enough I said.“ The Emperor snapped and the Doctor immediately noticed the jealousy in her voice. “Guards!“ She called and River let go of the Doctor with a pout. The door opened and Yaz came in. She pressed her balled fist to her chest in a salute of sorts. She didn’t bat an eyelid at their state of undress.

“Emperor?“

“Take the prisoner to a holding cell, no-one is to know her identity and no-one is allowed in without my say so, understood?“ The Emperor ordered.

“Right away.“ Yaz nodded and stepped up to the Doctor.

“Not with the handcuffs again.“ The Doctor groaned and winced in pain when she pulled her arms back. The wound on her shoulder had soaked through her coat on both sides now and started bleeding more heavily again at the forceful movement of her arm.

“Maybe we should get a Doctor to look at that.“ The Emperor mocked which made River laugh. “Have someone look at that, discreetly.“ She added and dismissed them with a wave of her hand. Before the Doctor could protest, Yaz pulled her along.

——

“You don’t talk much, do you.“ The Doctor leaned against the bars of the prison cell she had been brought to. The cell was completely isolated from any others that might have been around, it was a small angular room, half of which lay behind bars. The other half was completely empty bar a small control panel that would open and close the bars. And even in the cell, only the basics were provided. The Doctor was watching Yaz who stood a few meters away, close to the door, she appeared to be waiting for something, and she wasn’t talking.

“You know I’m perfectly fine by myself, not like I’m getting out of here.“ The Doctor carried on, she disliked silence so much. “This really hurts you know.“ She touched her hand to the wound in her shoulder. Yaz didn’t turn around, didn’t even react at all. “Sorry, I talk a lot when I’m stressed and this qualifies as stressful.“ The Doctor groaned exasperated.

“You really are nothing like her.“ Yaz huffed, annoyed by the constant chatter.

“She talks after all.“ The Doctor exclaimed, pleased at the small accomplishment. Maybe she would be able to get some information about this place, anything could help, and she had noticed a few things already. “There are a lot of humans here, considering this is Gallifrey.“ She observed leaning against the bars.

Yaz didn’t respond, almost as if she hadn’t heard her.

“How do you know her?“ The Doctor pressed on, she was genuinely curious. So far, she hadn’t observed anything you could describe as affection between the Emperor and, well, anyone with the exception for River. And yet they were all here. Her Fam. Amy and Rory. How did the ruler of the Gallifreyan Empire come by human advisors and guards? Even if she didn’t act affectionately towards them, she still seemed to trust them more than her average lot of guards. There had to be some history there. “She seems to trust you and Ryan and Graham… And Amy and Rory, they’re humans… where are all the Timelords?“ It was a fair question.

They were interrupted by a knock on the door and Yaz, clearly expecting someone, opened it promptly. The Doctor stuck her nose through the bars and spotted a young woman entering carrying a medical bag. She looked rather timid.

“You requested a medic?“ The girl asked stepping into the room. Her eyes fell on the Doctor who gave her a little wave, and she froze.

“You’re not to speak to anyone about this, understand?“ Yaz asked and the girl nodded quickly slowly stepping forward. She had gone from timid to fearful at the sight of the Doctor. Yaz either didn’t notice or didn’t care, she walked up to the control panel and worked the controls to open the cell.

“No funny business.“ She told the Doctor who nodded slowly, not for Yaz’s sake but for the young woman’s. She looked terrified.

“I think it’s not me you need to worry about.“ The Doctor mumbled. She looked to the medic, she barely seemed old enough to be qualified in anything. It wouldn’t have mattered so much if she had been a Timelord but she wasn’t. The Doctor could tell straight away. And she could tell that she was scared of her. Was it because she was prisoner or was it because of who she looked like?

The Doctor glanced to Yaz who gestured for the woman to get a move on. The Doctor couldn’t help but think that she wasn’t the one the girl should be scared of around here. To make things easier, she stepped backwards and she shrugged off her coat, wincing a little as she did so, and sat on the metal bench. Surely, this was the least threatening she could possible be.

“Sorry for the inconvenience.“ The Doctor gave the girl a weak smile hoping to reassure her somehow. “Didn’t do this on purpose.“ She gestured to her shoulder.

“You’re going to need to take your shirt off too…“ The girl said, her voice a little shaky, she appeared uncomfortable asking.

“Ah yeah… you lot don’t seem to care too much for clothes…“ The Doctor huffed, she glanced to Yaz who was watching her every move. She tried her best to ignore her as she pulled her shirt up and over her head, swearing under her breath as she did so. She hugged her t-shirt to her chest covering herself up with her uninjured arm. The medic didn’t ask how it happened, she just opened her bag and pulled out some gauze to clean the wound. “You okay? You seem a bit tense.“ The Doctor asked, yet again disliking the silence.

The medic didn’t answer, she seemed to be trying to ignore her.

“You don’t have to be scared, I’m not going to hurt you.“ The Doctor carried on giving her a little smile. She didn’t like the effect she seemed to be having on her.

“I’m not.“ She replied. “Scared, I mean.“

“Yeah, nothing screams confidence like shaking hands.“ The Doctor chuckled though not unkindly.

“A couple of stitches should do it.“ The medic said when the cut was clean on both sides.

“Not a big fan of needles.“ The Doctor admitted, watching her prepare a curved suture needle. “Just slab a plaster on it?“ She suggested but the girl shook her head.

“Too big a cut, I’m afraid… I’m sorry, this is gonna hurt…“

“That’s okay.“ The Doctor gave her a reassuring smile, it was the best she could do to improve the situation for everyone. Painkillers didn’t seem to be something wasted on prisoners and she wasn’t going to show any sort of weakness in front of Yaz who continued to watch them. The Doctor winced when she pierce the skin but held her nerve. “You know I’m not her right? You don’t have to be scared, I’m not going to hurt you.“ She told the young medic, hoping to distract herself from the pain.

“I don’t know what you mean.“ The girl replied not very convincingly.

“You’re scared of her, like everyone else, just taking a guess here… I have absolutely nothing to do with her.“ The Doctor explained and leaned forward so that she could access the back of the wound more easily.

“How do you…“ The medic was tempted to ask but Yaz interrupted.

“Think that’s enough chatter.“ She snapped and the girl nodded quickly, setting about suturing her back.

“We may look the same but I’m nothing like her. Mirror image, so to speak.“ The Doctor carried on, keeping her eyes on Yaz who glared at her.

“How is that possible.“ The medic asked softly. She could tell it was true. This person was nothing like the one she shared a face with but how could that be?

“Well, funny story that…“ The Doctor started but Yaz interrupted more decisively this time.

“Fix her up and do it now.“

“You’re all scared of her, aren’t you? What is she doing to this place? This universe?“ The Doctor looked around to the medic who refused to answer now, clearly terrified of Yaz. Finished with with sutures, she returned her equipment to her bag and went to dress the wounds. Her hands were shaking and she nearly dropped the dressing.

“Let me…“ The Doctor placed her hand on hers to steady it, giving it a reassuring squeeze and her a soft smile.

“Who are you?“ The girl asked softly, unable to stop herself. She saw the warmth and kindness in the Doctor’s eyes, unlike anything she’d seen before.

“I think I’ll get you in trouble if I say, so better not.“ The Doctor glanced to Yaz who had a face like thunder. “But I promise I’m gonna try to find a way to help.“ Even though every inch of her body wanted to flee and leave this place behind, the moment she saw the fear in the eyes of this girl, she knew she couldn’t just turn her back. She would never refuse to help and those that were not in league with the Emperor seemed to need it.

“That should do it, just try to keep your arm still while it’s healing.“ The medic instructed trying her best to regain her professionalism.

“Looks like I’m not going anywhere any time soon so that shouldn’t be too difficult.“ The Doctor gave her a warm smile. “Thank you for fixing me up.“

“You’re welcome.“ The girl gave a small smile and a nod. She picked up her bag and turned to leave the cell, glancing back at the Doctor one last time, wondering what to make of her. Yaz reengaged the locking mechanism and the metal bars slid shut again.

“You really shouldn’t have done that.“ She said to the Doctor.

“Done what?“ The Doctor frowned confused. Before she could ask or do anything else, Yaz pulled her gun on the medic and shot her as she was leaving.  

“NO!“ The Doctor shouted in horror and jumped to her feet. She rushed to the bars that had already locked and even if they hadn’t, it was far too late. It had been a deadly blast, the girl had collapsed onto the ground, motionless. “Why would you do that? She didn’t do anything!“ The Doctor yelled at Yaz who seemed unfazed.

“Should have kept your mouth shut then, shouldn’t you. That’s on you for sharing things you shouldn’t have.“ Yaz retorted icily.

“You let her see my face, you were never letting her walk out of here anyway.“ The Doctor realised in horror. “Don’t try and put it on me.“

“No, probably not, but you made the decision far easier.“ Yaz retorted.

——

The Doctor stared at the spot where the medic had been shot long after they had taken her away. Yaz had left with them, her cell was secure, no need for personal guard now that she had been fixed up. It should have given the Doctor the opportunity to breath at last but she couldn’t. She felt claustrophobic. Not because of the cell necessarily, small as it may be, but because of the situation she found herself in. She couldn’t think of a way out. She had scanned the cell, the lock was foolproof. The very fact that they hadn’t bothered to empty her pockets should have given away how sophisticated a prison this was. Nothing she could do would get her out of here. So after a while, all that she could think to do was use the small sink in the corner to wash the blood out of her coat and t-shirt. Now, she lay on the metal bench that was cold against her bare back, staring out of her cell to the empty space outside it. She wasn’t sure how long it had been now. She hated the loneliness, the silence, she had had far too much of that in prison. The only thing she was certain on was that eventually, they’d come back for her. They wanted something from her after all. She was torn between wanting to interact with someone and dreading what sort of thing the Emperor would dream up to make her talk. She shuddered a little at the memory of the mad twinkle in her eyes as she had leaned above her and stabbed her. She marvelled at how eyes that were the same warm hazel as her own could appear so cold.

“Think, Doctor, think, how do you get back?“ She mumbled to herself and looked up to the ceiling. No matter how hard she tried, she could’t focus. Her mind kept returning to her mirror self. The fear she had seen in the young medic’s eyes was haunting her. Even if she could find a way to return to her own reality, could she really leave this universe to its fate?

——

“Fuck…“ River breathed. Her head was spinning and her muscles ached. The Emperor dropped onto the mattress beside her and pulled her into her arms. River rested her head on her wife’s chest breathing heavily, trying to recover. The Emperor brushed her hair back from her sweaty brow and pressed a kiss on top of her head.

“I missed you.“ She mumbled enjoying the moment, their four combined hearts beating in perfect time.

“Well, that much is obvious.“ River smirked lazily drawing patterns on her chest with her fingertips. She pressed a kiss to her jaw. “Are you sure it hasn’t got anything to do with a certain visitor making puppy eyes at me?“ She teased and pushed herself up a little stretching her aching muscles. She rubbed her neck and shoulders were her wife had left dark marks. “You certainly staked your claim.“

“You’d eat her alive.“ The Emperor brushed the comment off pretending like she didn’t care.

“Might be fun.“ River smirked and her wife huffed:

“If you like that sort of thing.“

“You don’t have to be so jealous.“ River chuckled, amused that she couldn’t keep her annoyance out of her wife.

“I’m not.“ The Emperor shot back.

“Yes you are.“ River teased pushing herself up against her, brushing her hair back. “I mean, I could probably do unspeakable things to her and she’d thank me for it.“ She whispered huskily.

“You’re mine and mine alone.“ The Emperor snapped and shoved her off. She pushed her down and straddled her and pinned her hands to the bed.

“Are we going for round two?“ River grinned breathlessly, her wife’s possessive nature had always excited her. She buckled her hips against her. “I’m all yours.“

The Emperor let go of her, still annoyed, and climbed off the bed.

“I can’t wait to get rid of her. She’s an embarrassment, to share a face with her…“ She walked over to a table of refreshments and poured herself a glass of water. She had worked up quite a sweat. River rolled onto her stomach watching her, regarding her naked body with adoration. She never could get enough of her. Out of the many faces she had had, this was by far River’s favourite.  

“Then we better get whatever we can from her so we can move on?“ She suggested.

“I need that information. We have to find a way to cross over.“ The Emperor mused turning back to her wife. There were only very few people in her inner circle of advisors, an even fewer number of them she trusted and only one she would ever share her worries with. “The generals are restless. Conquest is progress and there is nothing left to conquer.“

“Yes, it seems like the voices of discourse are getting louder.“ River agreed sitting up now.

“Did something happen?“ The Emperor asked with a frown.

“Another attempt on my parents’ lives…“ River answered in an off hand sort of way.

“They’re getting bolder.“ The Emperor huffed in annoyance and took a sip of water. “Who was it?“

“They dealt with it, it was probably because you were away… they wouldn’t dare while you’re around.“ River answered and reached for a silky dressing gown that lay draped over the bottom of the bed.

“Next time something like this happens, I will make a spectacle of them.“ The Emperor decided watching her wife saunter over as she fastened the gown around herself. “They can’t be trusted, none of them.“

“We could just kill them all…“ River hummed and reached out to stroke her wife’s cheek.

“The rift would be too obvious, people would see it as a sign of weakness, they’re on the verge of revolting as it is.“ The Emperor shook her head and finished her drink. She put the crystal glass down and pulled River into her arms. “No, we need a big victory, we need to expand. Silence the doubters and give the population what they want.“

“I would be delighted to get the information you want out of her.“ River brushed a strand of her wife’s hair back.

“River.“ The Emperor rolled her eyes at her.

“Please, let me have some fun.“ River pouted.

“I don’t like the way you’re looking at her.“ The Emperor admitted with surprising honestly.

“Darling, I can’t help that, she is you.“ River sighed.

“She is nothing like me.“ The Emperor snapped and River pressed a tender kiss to her lips to reassure her.

“You know it’s you I love.“ So what if her eyes wandered a little looking at the Doctor? Physically they were the same and she couldn’t help it. She also couldn’t help the intrigue of it. But it didn’t change how she felt about her wife, not remotely.

“You keep away from her.“ The Emperor said, somewhere between an order and a request.

“Of course, my love.“ River gave her another soft kiss, as much as she enjoyed teasing her, she would never do anything to retry or hurt her. “That doesn’t leave many people we can trust to do this though.“ She mused. “Amy…“

“Your mother is too impulsive, she’d kill her by accident.“ The Emperor shook her head. “No, I have a better idea… Though you probably won’t like it.“

[razieltwelve]

First 7 Win Draft! (MTG Arena)

In Magic: The Gathering, I’ve generally been better at constructed than draft. However, with the way MTG Arena is structured, getting better at draft was something I wanted to do.

So, over the past couple of months, I’ve been saving coins and even using gems to do drafts to try to improve. The first month was pretty awful. I’m not going to lie. The fact that I was also rare-drafting to help fill out my collection didn’t help either. It was also a way of mitigating my losses since I tended to be awful, so at least I’d walk away with some rare cards even if I bombed out. And there were most definitely drafts where I bombed out.

But I kept at it, and I started studying more. I read draft guides; I looked at tier lists; I practiced on Draftsim; and I watched a lot of more skilled drafters in action. I found the videos by Nizzahon Magic to be especially useful since he talks a lot about why he drafts the things he does or makes the plays he does, and I felt we had a similar approach to the game in general.

I also had to get used to the different rhythm of draft. When you’re playing constructed, just killing everything is an option because you can build a deck with enough removal to do that. In draft, you’ll basically never have more than a few pieces of removal, so you have to use them sparingly. Likewise, your threat density in draft is so much thinner than in constructed, so you have to be much more aware of how you manage your creatures. That 2/1 or 1/3 isn’t something you can throw away, and you’ve got to really shepherd your fliers and other evasion critters because they might be the only way you can get damage through later.

Today, I finally managed to get to 7 wins in premier Zendikar draft. 7 wins is special because once you get to 7 wins, the draft ends, and you get the highest level of rewards possible. I’ve never done it before. I’ve gone 6-3 a couple of times, but each time I stumbled on the final match. Not this time.

But let me set the stage...

I started off by doing a Theros quick draft since I wanted to get some drafting in, but I didn’t want to spend any gems. After drafting what I felt was a very solid deck with plenty of playable and more removal than I ever thought possible, I proceeded to go 2-3 after getting horribly mana screwed twice and getting run over by someone with a playset of Iroas’s Blessing and the sort of hyper aggressive B/R deck that you dream of drafting. Seriously, that deck was incredible. Looking at my deck, I thought it would go at least 4-3, but it just wasn’t to be.

I was a little bit aggravated by that, but at the same time, I was also very happy with the deck that I drafted. I thought it was super solid. I just didn’t get much help from the shuffler, and I ran into the equivalent of a rocket-propelled freight train. So I thought... why not give premier draft a go? My recent drafting attempts had managed to garner me a decent quantity of gems, and I had a good feeling about it since I feel I’ve got a better grasp of Zendikar draft than Theros.

So I paid up my 1500 gems and gave it a go. Of course, since I’m me, I decided I’d do some rare-drafting as well. 

The first pack wasn’t bad. I opened a Haggra Mauling for a super easy first pick that was also a rare that I wanted. I also picked up some nice playable like Shepherd of Heroes and Malakir Rebirth although I hadn’t settled yet on a colour to pair with black. About halfway through the pack, it became clear to me that black was relatively open since I was able to load up on plenty of mid-range (in quality) stuff to help round out the pack. I also dipped into red after Roil Eruption and Cinderclasm came by while white only had a few playables, but nothing as good as those two cards except the angel.

Pack two began with me picking the Mankindi Throne (yes, I know it’s draft garbage, but I needed it for my collection...) and finding out that red was getting cut by somebody else. I was a bit surprised since the Roil Eruption and Cinderclasm had gotten to me late in pack one, so I’d assumed red wasn’t taken, but I got nothing out of red from pack two. With red cut, I switched fully to white, which seemed to open up as a Canyon Jerboa and Felidar Retreat made their way to me mid-pack. At that point, I was questioning the sanity of some of my fellow drafters because I don’t think I’ve ever seen a Felidar Retreat go pick 7 before. That card is completely nuts and requires basically no commitment from your deck other than you have some plains in it. 

Despite only committing properly to white in pack two, I was extremely relieved to be able to pick up some solid playables for it. I even managed to snag a second Shepherd of Heroes, which had me feeling even better about my decision to switch from red to white.

Pack three began with some more good luck. I opened a Squad Commander for an easy pick, and there were suddenly some clerics available to help fill out the party sub-theme I had going. I grabbed a couple, and I must have sent a strong enough signal because a Cleric of Life’s Bond wheeled and made it’s way into my deck. I didn’t have enough for a full on cleric deck, but I had enough clerics + incidental life gain that I thought I could make it work. If nothing else, I did need a two drop to fill out my curve. Getting a Mankindi Stampede in pack three was great too, and I was pretty certain that, at most, only one other person was drafting white because I was getting some goodies in the mid-to-late pack that I wouldn’t be getting if more people were in white.

My deck ended up being a BW mid-range deck that used clerics and a party-sub-theme to get through the early game and put on some aggression before landfall stuff (e.g., Prowling Felidar, Dreadwurm, Canyon Jerboa, and Felidar Retreat) combined with my fliers stabilised and took control of the game.

It did not start well.

In fairly short order, I was 2-2 with my two losses being just brutal and my two wins being close fought. At that point, I was already consoling myself with the fact I’d managed to snag quite a few rare cards during the draft, and at least I’d get some gems back (albeit not many) for winning twice. I told myself that I just had to focus on getting one more win since three wins gets you most of your investment back.

That fifth game was extremely close. It basically came down to me surviving an onslaught of aggression and trading creatures until I finally managed to slam Felidar Retreat onto a basically empty board. Felidar Retreat then did what it does best, and I basically out-valued my opponent the rest of the way.

From there, I played three more close games. Seriously, the games were tight, and I don’t think I’ve ever played better in a a draft. I won all but one of them with barely any life left after always going second (I think I only went first once the whole time), and there were a stack of complex decisions to make about how to use the removal I had and about when to trade and when to just take damage. The only easy game I had was the one in which my opponent got stuck on three mana, and I drew like a boss to just run over them with Canyon Jerboa shenanigans.

The last two games were nerve-wracking. In the game for my sixth win, I was up against this white-green party build. The early game was basically me getting punched in the face over and over again as they curved out like a champ and used three copies of Practiced Tactics to blow me out. After the second one, I thought, there’s no way they can have a third... and they did.

The pivotal moment in the game came when they went in to attack with their entire team, and I was able to engineer a situation that resulted in my team trading for theirs thanks to a Practiced Tactics of my own on a key creature. With the board clear, I was able to find my fliers, and they soared over for the win.

In the game for my seventh win, I was again on the back foot early. I went second, and the opponent was playing this awesome three colour landfall build with a party sub-theme. I was knocked down to 10 life in a real hurry as his landfall creatures outclassed mine, and I couldn’t find good spots to trade. I even got stuck on four mana for a bit. Finally, though, I found a Shepherd of Heroes and Felidar Retreat to stabilise with the lands to make them work. Unfortunately, they had a Territorial Scythecat, a Canyon Jerboa, and a bunch of creatures on their side with a Seagte Banneret threatening to pump their team. 

The game stalled out, but the biggest moment came when I could have played a spell on my turn but elected not to because I wanted to bluff a trick after showing him a combat trick earlier. I didn’t have anything, but the game was so close that I felt sure they wouldn’t attack into five open mana with three cards in my hand.

They played Mind Drain. In my hand were two cards that I didn’t super need... and my one copy of Mankindi Stampede. If I had played a spell, I would have been forced to discard it since I’d be left with only two cards in hand. Instead, I got to keep it, and I was able to gradually add to my board even as he forced through damage using Angelheart Protector to make his gigantic Scythecat indestructible. 

Since they weren’t in blue (they were running BWG), I knew that if I could just get enough creatures on the board, then my Stampede would win me the game. Unfortunately, I stopped drawing lands, so I couldn’t keep using Felidar Retreat to go wide, but I did draw a few creatures. However, they were drawing plenty of creatures themselves, and that Scythecat just kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger.

At this point, with the board basically stalled out, I had a slight edge since I had the only flier on the board. I was slowly but surely chipping away at their life total, but then they made their move. They had played a Tajuru Blightblade earlier, but they’d kept it back to dissuade my reasonably large Prowling Felidar from cracking back at them. That’s when they drew a Taunting Arbormage.

I knew exactly what they were thinking. The kicked Taunting Arbormage would force everything to block the Blightblade, so that when they swung with the rest of their team, I wouldn’t be able to block, and I’d be dead.

There was just one problem: I was holding my Practiced Tactics in hand.

I blew up the Blightblade and started assigning blockers. The end result was me being alive and them without any blockers left to stop my counter swing for lethal. Once the dust cleared, they conceded, and I had my seventh win.

I might have done a little dance around the room when I realised that I’d finally gotten it.

7-2. 

Not bad. And the six packs I got as part of the prize? Solid hits on all of them.

Best night on Arena ever.

[flightfoot]

I think I’ve figured out why Marinette’s characterization in Weredad bothers me so much

It’s because she doesn’t seriously consider Chat’s feelings during it. I’ll give her a pass on the initial lie of being in love with him (well not totally a lie, but you know what I mean). She was panicking and looking for something, ANYTHING to throw him off the scent. She chose poorly, but it was a knee-jerk reaction, her mouth spoke before her brain caught up, it happens.

Her response after that though, when she’s had time to think it through? That’s all on her. 

So after the initial lie, she’s stuck in this situation. Her parents and Chat all believe that she’s in love with Chat, and SHE believes that if she reveals that she’s NOT in love with him, that he’ll immediately figure out that she’s Ladybug. A poor assessment of the situation, but fine. She’s anxious and tends to catastrophize, that’s just something she’s dealing with.

But even with the tight spot she put herself in, she still should have considered Chat’s feelings in all this. How he might feel about someone confessing her love to him, especially with her not really meaning it. 

Instead, this is what we get:

(Marinette is looking out from her balcony with Tikki. The sky is cloudy. She smirks and crosses her arms.) Marinette: He's not coming. Tikki: But if he does, what are you gonna say to him? Marinette: I'm sure he's not coming. He's in love with Ladybug. He's not gonna come have brunch just for macaroons. Tikki: He's been rejected so many times by Ladybug. Maybe he's changed his mind. Marinette: Cat Noir, change his mind? Ha! I seriously doubt it. No one's as stubborn and one-track-minded as him.

Ok so here, she’s just thinking it won’t affect him much. I can sorta see why she’d think that. He DOES come off as a devil-may-care flirt. It’s why she didn’t take his feelings towards Ladybug seriously until Glaciator. I don’t think it speaks well of her understanding of him that she’s still making this mistake in season 3, AFTER Glaciator, but it’s understandable at least. But her response after he DOES show up? Not so much.

Marinette: I told you he won't come. (She leaves. Tikki looks out and sees Cat Noir making his way towards the balcony.) Tikki: Eh? Looks like you underestimated Cat Noir's love of macaroons! Marinette: (She turns around) I don't believe it! What a glutton! (Cat Noir lands in front of the bakery while holding the rose and looking worried. Marinette looks down at him and turns around.) Marinette: Oh no! What if this doofus has actually fallen in love with me? For what? Seconds? Is that all his love for Ladybug is worth? Just one tiny declaration of love and that's it, poof, he changes his mind?! Tikki: Uh, since you and Ladybug are the same person, he didn't exactly change his mind. Marinette: (She puts her face in her hands) Oh no, I definitely have to tell him that I'm not really in love with him. Wait, I can't! If I tell him that I don't love him, he won't understand why I told him that I loved him in the first place! I only told him that I loved him so that he wouldn't figure out I'm Ladybug. But if he sees that I lied, then he'll alsosee that I did all of that so he wouldn't guess that I'm Ladybug! (yelling) And he'll figure out that I'm Ladybug! (The doorbell rings) Tom: (voice) Marinette? Marinette! Marinette: (pleading) Tikki, help me! (Tikki gives her an apologetic look)

Here she considers the possibility that Chat may actually be in love with her, so it DOES cross her mind, and judging by her words and actions after this, seems to be her operating assumption until Chat rejects her. But she doesn’t consider that he might be hurt or feel bad about it.

This especially shows in her overreaction to Chat’s rejection.

Marinette: (excitedly) Oh, this is so— (She remembers she's supposed to be heartbroken.) Uh… (She looks at her parents.) So sad! (grabbing Cat Noir, dramatically) Oh, to think I spent all this time following you everywhere to tell you that I loved you Cat Noir! (cries) I am so miserable! (weeps on table) No one will ever love me! (Her father looks sad and concerned) (into her hands) I'll end up all alone with my hamster, (running to the stairs) and its name will be (inhales) Loneliness!! (She slams the door and continues crying)

Scene: Marinette's room. She spins to her chair. Tikki flies out.

Marinette: (singing) La, la, la, la, la! Ah, such a relief, Tikki. Phew! He's not in love with me. (Tikki looks disappointed)

I get her viewpoint here. She feels like she really needs to sell that she’s in love with Chat, so she goes completely over-the-top, especially since she’s still sorta in panicky-anxiety mode. But it just never seemed to occur to her how horrible Chat would feel after he believed he hurt her THAT badly. And she really should have. I can see why she might think that he wouldn’t take her love confession too seriously, that he wouldn’t reciprocate, that he wouldn’t be greatly affected by it. 

But she SHOULD know that Chat would care about making her cry, making her upset. She KNOWS that Chat cares about other people’s feelings. But it just never seems to occur to her that her reaction could affect him.

Contrast this with how Chat handles the situation, handles rejecting her.

(In Adrien’s room)

Adrien: Marinette in love with Cat Noir? I didn't think he was her type. Plagg: Before you know it, we'll be enjoying some warm and crispy bread to go with every piece of cheese. Our life is about to change! Adrien: Stop it, Plagg. You know I'm in love with Ladybug. (He heads for his bathroom) Plagg: So? I don't see the problem in keeping two pots simmering on the stove. (To himself) Especially when there's actually only one pot! (laughs and swallows cheese) (He joins Adrien) Adrien: I have to be honest with Marinette. I'll go over there for brunch, but only to tell her the truth.

After taking a few minutes to process he comes to terms with his feelings on the situation and resolves to be open and honest with Marinette.

This happens as he’s about to leave:

Plagg: Delicious bread here we come! Adrien: I told you, Plagg, we're not having brunch there. I'm only gonna tell Marinette that she's not the one I love. Then we'll leave. Plagg: Aw… (He slumps over) Adrien: She's gonna be so sad. How can I make this easier on her? (He looks down and picks up the rose from his tray) Plagg: You're right. Breaking her heart with flowers will be much more romantic. (Adrien looks at the rose worriedly)

He’s seriously considering how Marinette will feel and attempting to make things easier. Whether a rose was the best way to do it, I don’t know. But he was trying. He’s desperately trying not to hurt Marinette. And this show in his rejection of her. He does it in the gentlest, kindest way he knows how.

Cat Noir: (swallows) Well, actually, Mr. Dupain, Mrs. Dupain-Cheng, Marinette, here's the thing. You're really nice people and this meal is delicious and by far the friendliest I've had in a long time. (He puts his hand on Marinette's shoulder) Marinette, you're an awesome girl, and I get that you have feelings for me. After all, I'm awesome in so many ways, even I could fall in love with myself! (Marinette shakes her head in annoyance.) (Tom and Sabine blink in confusion.) Cat Noir: Anyway, I'm afraid my heart belongs to someone else. (Marinette looks up) Even if she keeps rejecting me. (She looks towards Cat Noir) Even if she loves somebody else. I'm in love with Ladybug. (to Marinette) I'm really sorry, Marinette.

He reinforces that she’s an awesome person and basically tells her that it’s not her, it’s him. But he’s also crystal clear and straightforward. He handled it really well, attempting to soften the blow while being very honest about his feelings.

Chat considers Marinette’s feelings at every step of this and specifically goes out of his way to try to make her feel better as best he knows how. This is a very jarring contrast with Marinette in this episode, who doesn’t consider that Chat may be hurt at all.

Now to be clear, I DON’T think Marinette was malicious in this episode. She wasn’t setting out to hurt Chat or anyone else. She was simply so absorbed in her own problems that she didn’t stop to consider how her actions might affect everyone else. She was just really, really careless about others’ feelings this episode, which isn’t typical of her - at least season 1 and season 2 version of her.

On the bright side, at least we got a fantastic portrayal of Chat out of this episode.

[kiminicricket]

Swords and Opals - Part 5

Previously Ruthari Fic - because I’m awesome at naming things...

Anyways, previous parts can be found below:

1 // 2 // 3 // 4

Tiadrin set a pace similar to the one Runaan had been setting the last two days - if a little bit faster - and the team made very good time, coming to the coast by mid-morning. They pulled up, overlooking the vast ocean and clear blue sky.  

“Ok, so where do we find this flower?” Lain asked, shifting the pack on his shoulders. 

Tiadrin shrugged and looked to Runaan.

“The instructions didn’t say beyond this point.” Runaan looked at Ethari, “do you know?”

Ethari looked up the shoreline, noting some cliffs in the distance. 

“There is probably a good place to start. They tend to do well on sea-side cliffs.”

The team nodded and started to move in that direction. 

It was a long walk, and the team stayed quiet for most of it. Ethari, walking beside Runaan for a change, tried desperately to come up with a topic of conversation. Something that would make him look good. His mind however was painfully blank. What was he supposed to just start asking twenty questions? His favourite colour? How he liked to take his tea? It seemed stupid, and completely irrelevant to the situation. Glancing over out of the corner of his eye, Runaan seemed content to travel in silence so Ethari contented himself with the same, letting his mind wander instead over their journey so far. Eventful as it had been emotionally, and taxing as it had been physically it had still gone fairly smoothly so far, all things considered. He glanced up at the cliffs. They were getting close. 

The trial did seem a little easy, as Lain had suggested two days ago. Ethari couldn’t shake the feeling that there must be something more to it. He also couldn’t wait to see the flower up close. There were so many applications for the flower, his mind was running through the different enchantments he could try, so long as they got it home alive. 

“Did the instructor send along anything to transport the flower back in?” Ethari asked.

“I don’t think so, why?” Runaan turned to him as they walked. 

Ethari bit his lip and considered for a moment. “It must be part of the trial. The flower doesn’t do well with transplanting or transporting. It’s part of the reason they’re so rare.”

“Did the instructions say we had to bring it back alive?” Tiadrin called back, “Maybe just the fact that we got it will be enough?”

Runaan paused and pulled out the parchment, studying it for a moment. Ethari stopped beside him and Tiadrin and Lain also paused, turning back to face them. 

“We pass if we bring it back at all, but there are extra points for bringing it back alive.”

Lain groaned. “I need all the extra points I can get.”

“Maybe if you stuck your nose in a book once in a while you’d be ok.” Runaan teased. Lain grinned and shrugged. 

“Probably, but I wouldn’t have nearly as much fun.” He smiled down at Tiadrin, who pretended not to notice. Ethari caught the ends of her ears turning slightly pink though.

“If we get the extra points, we basically get the pick of where we want to go after this. What we want to do with our lives. Assassins Guild, Dragon Guard, anything. I say we bring it back alive.” Tiadrin said. 

“I’m inclined to agree.” Runaan turned to Ethari, “Any idea’s on how?”

“I have a few things that might work?” He said, hesitantly. “I’ll start thinking on it. We need to get the thing first.”

“Right you are.” Lain turned and dropped the short distance onto the sand, Tiadrin following close behind. 

As their feet made contact, the sand in front of them started shifting, knocking them off balance. Lain tried to steady Tiadrin, but they fell in a heap together as the sand shifted, displacing as an enormous head rose from the sand. A forked tongue flickered out as the neck kept coming impossibly longer. 

Ethari stared in horror, Tiadrin was down there! She was going to be- An arrow flew past him and hit its mark straight into the creatures eye. It hissed in pain and outrage and lunged forward. 

Ethari spun to see Runaan, bow in hand, already loosing another arrow before rolling out of the way of the creature’s strike. 

Right, weapons. Ethari dropped his pack and scrambled for his bow. Trying to calm his shaking hands as he notched an arrow and lined up the creature in his sights. It wasn’t hard, the thing was huge. He had already lost sight of Runaan behind it, so let his arrow fly. It hit the creature, but bounced harmlessly off the thick hide. 

Tiadrin and Lain came charging over the embankment they had dropped down, Tiadrin with her sword out, Lain with his Scythe, they ran towards the creature, Ethari went to follow when the creature swiped around with it’s long, barbed tail. Tiadrin and Lain jumped over the swipe with ease, but Ethari was a little slower, and found himself flying sideways and colliding with a tree. 

Ethari tried to get up to go to his friends but found he couldn’t move. He tried to wiggle his fingers, but nothing happened. Helpless, Ethari watched as Tiadrin loosed the tip of her sword, screaming as she flung it around the creatures neck and used the momentum to haul herself up onto its back before retracting the tip and stabbing it. Runaan let out arrow after arrow and Lain sliced against the scales with his Scythe, the three of them quickly bringing the creature down. Runaan was the first to notice Ethari, motionless against the tree. 

“Ethari!” He called, running over to him. “Are you alright?” He knelt down beside him. Ethari tried to speak, but couldn’t. He tried to keep the fear from his eyes, but knew he was failing. 

Runaan ran an assessing eye over Ethari. He grabbed his hand. 

“Can you feel that?”

Ethari could, but didn’t know how to express it. He blinked. Runaan looked at him expectantly. Tiadrin and Lain had also crowded around, Tiadrin kneeling on his other side. 

“He got hit by the tail.” She said. “He went flying.”

Lain jogged over to the creature and hacked off one of the barbs from the tail. He brought it back and Runaan inspected it, sniffing. 

“A paralytic.” He sighed in relief. He turned to Ethari and smiled. “You’ll be ok, it should wear off shortly.”

Tiadrin grabbed Ethari’s other hand, holding it close to her. “And we’ll wait here until it does.”

Ethari just blinked at her. Relieved at the news that this was a short term issue, but embarrassed that he was in this situation, and helpless to do anything about it.

The other three settled in around him, weapons within arms reach, but seemingly relaxed for the moment. 

Ethari closed his eyes, willing the moments to pass swiftly so he could be a functioning member of the team again. He tried not to dwell on the fight, trying instead to think about the flower, about transporting it safely, but again and again his mind returned to his friends effortless grace, and his own ineptitude. 

“That is quite a sword Tiadrin,” he heard Runaan’s voice say above him, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Isn’t it though?” She replied, with no small amount of pride. “My father made it, but Ethari has been working on it. He’s enchanted it to be sturdier against creatures with thicker hides, and that laso trick you saw? All Ethari’s tinkering!”

“What?”

“That’s amazing!”

Lain and Ruthari spoke together.

“Yeah, he reckon’s he’s gonna improve it some more for me.”

Ethari cracked his eyes open. Runaan and Lain were staring at him with wide eyes, Lain’s jaw was hanging open. 

“That is impressive!”

“You have to do something for my pole-arm!” 

“Ahem!” Tiadrin quieted them. “Commissions take time and effort so you can submit your requests through me and Ethari and I will discuss a fair price.” She gave them both a pointed glare. Ethari would have chuckled if he could have. He would be more than happy to have a look at their weapons. Trust Tiadrin to guard his time.

“Of course, of course,” Runaan said.

“Aw come-on Tia, don’t be like that.”

In a flash Tiadrin’s sword was at Lain’s throat. 

“Call me that again.” She growled.

Lain’s eyes widened and he held up his hands placatingly. It was at that moment feeling returned in a rush to Ethari, and he reached out to grab Tiadrin’s sword hand. 

Tiadrin turned towards Ethari, dropping the sword and throwing her arms around him. 

“Don’t you ever do that to me again! I need you in my life, ok? Don’t scare me like that!” She wailed into his shoulder. Ethari returned the embrace, chuckling. 

“I’ll do my best.” He raised his gaze to Lain’s still shaken one. “She doesn’t like that name.” He smiled. 

Lain nodded, eyes still on Tiadrin “Noted.”

Ethari let his gaze wander to Runaan, but the other elf’s attention was back towards the beach and the cliffs. 

“I think we should take the forest route to the cliffs.” Runaan said.

“I don’t know I reckon I could take another of those…” Etharis joking tone trailed off as he looked over at the giant corpse, “Or, yeah we could take the forest route.”

Tiadrin helped him up and Ethari retrieved his pack before following the others back into the forest.

Part 6 now up!

[theshinsun]

4, 5, 7, 10, 13, 15, 16, 17, 23, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 33, 36, 39, 40, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 59, 60 [Which do you prefer between Knb and Haikyuu?] for the ask you recently reblogged please?

4. what are you looking forward to?

I'm looking forward to school starting again, even if it's just a weird hybrid of online/flipped classes, I miss my teachers and like, being productive. also if I'm in class I can't be worked borderline inhumane hours right…. right??

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

yeah, my roommate. she always either knows how to cheer me up, or blunders around trying to find the right method to the point that it's funny and I end up smiling anyway. she's really awesome like that.

7. what was your life like last year?

it had a lot of ups and downs. I had a great job, but the people I worked with eventually made it toxic and awful. I was doing really well in school, but stressed all the time, had an awesome relationship but kind of ruined it w my anxiety, and had serious roommate issues that made me afraid to leave my bedroom or even come home, sometimes. I remember a lot of very high highs and very low lows especially in the fall/winter of that year.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?

well, yes and no… I don't tend to show a lot of emotion to begin with, but what I do show, I'm basically incapable of hiding, and apparently I'm a terrible liar bc my face gives me away.

13. how do you feel right now?

I'm pretty alright… kind of anxious, kind of tired, but that's just been the status quo lately tbh. 

15. personality description

already answered, so I suppose I'll elaborate. I'm simultaneously like, the most confident and the most self-doubting person I know... like there are certain things I'm super certain of and times when I feel no shame, and there are others where I'll just shrivel into a ball of anxiety and mortification and never come out. in the same vein, I'm simultaneously very trusting and open and very wary and cautious with people… it really depends on the situation and the person I think, I'm a very "you get out what you put in" person.

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn't?

yeah, I’m still holding onto things I’ve wanted to tell certain people tbh… I used to be a lot more forthcoming and not worry about the consequences of what I had to say, but now that I’ve seen what power words have to ruin relationships and impact people I tend to hold back quite a bit. 

17. opinion on insecurities

I have… many, but I understand that I shouldn't and am working on the ones I do have. I think feeling insecure can lead to some of the most ugly, toxic emotions and responses in certain people, so I'm trying to be conscientious of that.

23. fear(s)

um let’s see… jump scares, the dark (sometimes), corners I can’t see around, drowning/suffocating, pain, failure, losing control...

27. things I hate

wet socks, sunburn, acne, willful ignorance, bigotry, excessively negative people… uh… idk hate's a strong word that's all I've got

28. I'll love you if…

if you are genuinely, authentically yourself. if you’re the kind of person I can feel comfortable and at ease with. if you show me patience and compassion and make an effort to know me and let me know you… then yeah you’re never getting rid of me. 

29. favorite film(s)

The Road to El Dorado, Into the Spider-verse, Howl’s Moving Castle, Spirit, Life of Pi, The Truman Show, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

30. favorite tv show(s)

Haikyuu!!, Kuroko no Basuke, Avatar, Bojack Horseman, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Beastars, Dragonball Z

31. 3 random facts

already answered so here's three more

1. lately I've been carrying a fanny pack with the trans flag (there's an unfortunate but very tempting pun in there) and it's still got the security tag bc they forgot to take it off in the store so now every time I walk through the doorway to like, a drug store, I set off the alarm. I would get it taken off but it was sent to me from Chicago lol.

2. I've got a lot of outdoorsy skills bc of my gym class in high school, like rock climbing, kayaking, building fire, etc. I'm not super adventurous in my daily life but while I was in that class, I did all kinds of things.

3. for awhile I worked at a cat cafe, and helped take care of the 12-15 rescue cats we'd have there at any given time. I stand by that it was the best job I've ever had, but the people I worked with, not so much. 

33. something you want to learn

I really want to learn to skateboard or surf. it's been a dream for a long time and I have (suspiciously acquired) both, but my balance is shit and I have no patience for new skills lately, so...

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?

already answered so here's three more

1. someday I want to have a pickup truck, I've been looking at, like, bright orange Tacomas and stuff, but of course I'd need a license to be able to drive one

2. I'd like to have a garden again, or maybe have a plot in a community garden. I've been growing nasturtiums and things on my balcony while in school but it's not quite the same

3. still waiting on the day I can get top surgery tbh. I just… want to be able to be shirtless at the beach and wear tank tops with nothing underneath, okay?

39. favorite sport(s)

ahahahaha… favorite sport you say. to play or to watch? 'cause I generally don't like to do either, tho I do like watching the folks who play volleyball on the beach. and considering one of my favorite shows is about volleyball and it was the sport I sucked at the least in school, maybe we’ll go with volleyball? but in general I’m not a sports person. 

40. favorite memory

I have a vague memory… of helping my mom in the garden of my old house when I was a little kid, mostly just digging in the dirt in the spring and being outside with my family… it's not very clear or specific but I think those days were some of the happiest of my life.

52. something I'm talented at

I'm good at learning the lyrics to songs, I've got over 1000 downloaded in my spotify library and I'm pretty sure I know the words to at least most of them. in a similar vein I'm good at learning the scripts to movies, and just… memorizing things in general especially audio.

53. 5 things that make me happy

already answered so here's some more!

1. songs with a light, strummy acoustic feel and creative lyrics… I've got a whole playlist for that vibe there's just something about songs like that that make me really calm

2. I really like being hugged or cuddled by my friends, just being in close proximity and hanging all over each other, makes me all warm and fuzzy inside tbh

3. I love driving with the windows down (I can't drive so I mean riding passenger lol), especially in the canyon by my house, through the forest and by the beach.

54. something that's worrying me at the moment

I’m so afraid things won’t go back to the way they were. ...that applies to multiple aspects of my life, not just with this pandemic but school, work, friends, relationships… it seems like I’m always chasing the past and dreading the future, so much that I can’t ever be satisfied in the present moment, and that’s something that’s been on my mind a lot. 

55. tumblr friends

@hadenxcharm, @spaztictwitch, @kurokonobaka, @taigainside, @hybristophilica and you could be too! all you gotta do is message me tbh I'm easy

56. favorite food(s)

strawberry cheesecake, fried shrimp, key lime pie, tuna steak

59. why I joined tumblr

I joined in 2012 bc my friends told me to, had a brief recession where I didn't use it at all, and a pretty lengthy sidetrack through the RP community, and then I came back bc of the friends I'd made here, and the unique-ness of the platform that I kinda can't find anywhere else. I'm stuck here just like the rest of y'all. 

60. ask me anything you want (which do you prefer between KNB and Haikyuu?)

now this is a tough one… bc I really love them both a lot, and tbh in terms of quality of writing, art/animation, thematic music, character development and general story, I think Haikyuu!! has KNB beat, buuuuuut…. in spite of its flaws, I have such a soft spot for KNB and I keep coming back to it over and over again even as it falls into relative obscurity. It's the only thing I write for anymore and I'm still, somehow, utterly obsessed with the characters I first fell in love with over five years ago. KNB has problems, for sure, but the things it gets right (like setting a mood, strong emotional beats and character relationships) it knocks out of the park. I don't know if I could ever choose one over the other in terms of like, "you can only read/watch one of these and have to give up the other forever", but in terms of which has had the biggest impact, and still hits me the hardest, I'd probably have to go with KNB… but it's not by any means an easy choice.     

[supernoondles]

2019

The last day of 2019 was also the day I fainted for the first time--a fitting metaphor for the year.

2019 was overall very emotionally taxing. This year was emotionally defined by falling intensely, deeply in love with someone (who is a very private person so I will try to be vague to respect that) and being in a lot of pain because of situations mostly outside of our control. There were a lot of intensely joyous moments, and a lot of intensely sad ones. Throughout it all I wish I had communicated better. I also made some bad decisions with another person I really loved and cared about that resulted in us growing apart. Do I think I grew from the experiences? For sure. Do I wish I could have come upon these realizations through a different course of action? Also yes. Am I fully healed from the experiences? Not really, but I've been getting better.

2019 was also very bad in terms of research. It was the 2nd year of my PhD. After I submitted my rotation project I basically felt stuck in the swamp of my advisors rejecting new project ideas for like literally half a year. This, combined with my high emotional volatility (partially due to starting birth control), made me really sad, unmotivated, and susceptible to self-blame. I definitely had high expectations for myself and became frustrated at my lack of progress and felt a lot of pressure from myself to get my shit together. I also felt incredibly bad after most advisor meetings and not supported by one of them to the point where I had to have a conversation with him about the lack of support (which was very scary)! Things started picking up, though, near the end of the year. I published a paper in collaboration with a former post-doc/now professor elsewhere whom I learned a lot from, and started finally building out another system. I also started mentoring an undergrad who at some point told me I helped him feel like he had something important to say and belong at Stanford for the first time and those words meant a lot to me. I think I'm continuing to refine what I value as research contributions and increasingly think about what it means to build systems that aren't used outside of the lab to satisfy the annual conference publishing cycle. I'm also starting to feel the pressure of doing work that follows a narrative rather than random projects that interest me.

Oh, I guess in terms of "program requirements," I did finish taking required classes, passed qualifying exams, and got a master's degree. But honestly those weren't hard at all nor do I think are externally valued in the larger research community, so I don't really celebrate them as accomplishments beyond surface level.

In 2019 I saw two different therapists. The first one was awful, I think directly influenced some of my bad decisions, and also didn't respect my gender identity??? The second one is a lot better and I'm grateful to see her, even if 90% of our sessions are just talking about my relationship (romantic/advisor) issues, which is something I want to move away from in the future. But I also feel incredibly privileged when relationship issues are the primary stressors in my life--I am grateful I feel equipped to handle other crap, like deadlines, and don't have to worry about my own health.

Those were the main things that have colored this year. We'll now move into the section of this post where I go through my photos to jog my memory of other events.

New years started a tradition of getting dim sum with Jasper, Matthew, and Michelle dear to my heart. My high school friend was also visiting and we all attended a really awesome new year's eve party. I was also going on a lot of dates and having a lot of good sex, which made me really happy, and at the same time crying all the time at work. In February I received probably the best gift anyone has ever given me and saw Panic! at the Disco, which I said in an end of the year group meeting was a good memory of my year (it was, to relive my scene days!). In March I roadtripped both to Marin (which I had never to been before, despite all my years in the bay) and LA for Wondercon; it was nice to both see high school friends and go on a trip with the boo. In April I went on a hike with my office which was probably the start of us all becoming closer (we are the social office in the wing now, which I take pride in! Also we draw a lot of Pokemon which warms my heart). In May I went to CHI in Glasgow and then to Paris afterward, and the entire experience was very weird and bad and also too many flights were canceled and/or missed and I vowed to not return to Europe for a while, but man do I love the noodles at Trois Fois plus de Piment. In June we hosted a double apartment party with my downstairs neighbors (side note: I am really appreciative of the place I live in, for the community, convenience, and large-ass space and will be really sad to be kicked out fall 2020) and I started a friendship important to me. I cat-sat for my advisor (the one who doesn't make me feel bad) twice. I went to Redwood State Park with my family and hosted a summer solstice celebration. Over the summer a friend I met in Paris back in 2017 moved in with me. I had a much needed escape from the bay to Seattle where I was reminded how abundant the world can be. I also went to Tahoe to celebrate my parents' anniversary, and really liked stumbling upon a smaller lake with a cheap boat rental. Then I became FOMO about the highly competitive Bay Area camping and did a last minute walk-in at Redwood Basin in Santa Cruz, which made me realize that I don't actually love camping (but was nice nonetheless). I ate an expensive meal at Commonwealth before they closed. For my birthday we made a friendship quilt and I served my favorite dish of cumin lamb but it was also 90 degrees in my apartment (I felt really bad and bought two fans afterwards). I started buying many cartoon frog plush after being gifted a $3.99 on sale Safeway frog (called Baby!). I went on Tinder dates (one of which was at a quaker yard sale marketed as Harvest Festival where I got a 1970s Kermit puppet for like $2) that largely went nowhere. My high school friend visited and we were both sad about break ups. I did Inktober before I went to New Orleans for a conference on Bourbon St where everything felt like it was coated in a sticky film of alcohol. I almost missed my flight home because I fell asleep in a sculpture garden but I had the most amazing Uber driver who snaked his way through traffic (oh and the flight was delayed by like 3 hours). I went to kind of embarrassing haunted houses and pumpkin patches over Halloween, but also had the most incredible bowl of ramen at Mensho. My whole office dressed up as Zootopia characters which warmed my furry heart. I spent like $120 on a Pokemon shirt. I started playing Arkham Horror and rekindled another friendship important to me. In November went on a road trip to Big Sur because again, I had to escape it all. For Christmas Eve dinner I roasted a duck for the first time (which was delicious). Shortly after I waited in line for 2 hours for a rollercoaster at Great America, which taught me the value of buying a fast pass because at this point in my life that money is worth it, and then waited 2 hours in line at the DMV to get a RealID (I had made an appointment, which was the fast pass).

Okay, now we move to the hobby section!

I got really into sewing in 2019, having received a sewing machine last Christmas. I made a Judy Hopps (which I wore to CrunchyRoll Expo) and Korok cosplay (Fanime), several unsuccessful garments, a crab bean bag, a dice bag, a fanny pack, and put hearts nipples on a jumpsuit.

Shows! I think I went to way fewer shows this year. The ones I can remember are Elephant Gym, Thom Yorke the night before I had an 8am flight, Carly Rae Jepsen over pride weekend (also, she is my #1 artist of the year, which makes a lot of sense given my emotional space), Mitski at Stern Grove, Capitol Hill Bloc Party (which was super lame, except for Lizzo, where I cried), and the National (which was a fucking surreal experience as they played on Stanford's campus, I was the only one within earshot of myself who knew the words to Crybaby Geeks, and then the white catalog moms came up to me after to thank me for singing the song).

I also started playing my own music! I started playing viola again for the first time in 7 years (lol) in both pop-up concerts with the Awesome Orchestra (one in Golden Gate Park, one at the Exploratorium) and a string quartet through my school. Sometimes I am filled with joy and delight. Other times interpersonal tensions run high and also I am very bad at being in tune. It's life.

Media! I really liked Mob Psycho 100 Season 2 and Beastars. I feel like those were the only notable anime I watched this year? I saw the Farewell three times--first in Seattle where I sobbed for like 1 hour after the movie, the second time with my parents, and the third where Awkwafina was present for a Q&A. I thought Parasite was incredible and Promare was OK. I have spent an unfortunately large amount of my time playing Pokemon Masters. I finally beat BOTW and completed my Pokedex in Shield like 2 weeks after getting the game.

Resolutions! In my draft of my 2018 end of year post (which I never polished and posted, sorry), I said my resolutions were 1. come out to my parents 2. draw enough to table at an anime con 3. be disciplined about paper reading and have a doc. I did none of these things!!! However, for 1, I feel like I am well equipped to have this conversation but am waiting for my sibling to do it first out of respect. 2 was just bad. I barely drew this year except for gifts. 3 was okay--I did have a large doc in the beginning of the year when I was looking for ideas, but as time went on I abandoned it (I also stopped reading papers, which I don't think you're supposed to do as a grad student...)

My resolutions this year are phrased as intentions (-(c) Matthew). They span several categories. Relationships: I want to open myself to and actively seek experiences of love, because I miss that. That being said, I will only date someone if 1. they have their life together 2. they love themselves and 3. they challenge me to grow. (I do think you can experience love without dating; the thing I'm after is love in an expansive sense.) Work: I want to do enough work so I don't feel guilty about not doing enough work, and also not berate myself for taking a long time to do things. Hobbies: I want to sew at least one thing a month. Chinese: I want to improve my Chinese, especially pronunciation.

Having written this 20 days into 2020, it's not been so bad so far. But I was also really happy in the beginning of 2019. Here's to no global maxima, a monotonically increasing year!

[k-u-z-u]

Can we please get a 1-100 answers so we dont need to recheck what you already got asked and just see everything.

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

Decalcomanie by MamamooDrama Club by Melanie MartinezNurse’s Office by Melanie MartinezShow And Tell by Melanie Martinez Detention by Melanie MartinezMake Me Wanna Die by The Pretty Reckless

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

@sangeki-x

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

Haha on page 23 there is only an illustration.

4: What do you think about most?

Things that worry me. 

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

”Slow”

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

With clothes.

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I can paint my nails with my non dominant hand perfectly. (Can you tell I’m not special at all?) 

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are amazing. Boys are awesome. 

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Omfg yes both I hate being rude, but they were so cringe.

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

Few weeks ago I gues. :’D

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

Is cleithrophobia strange? 

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

No.

13: What’s your religion?

Christian.

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Working or going to school. Sometimes shopping. 

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind it.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

Mamamoo

17: What was the last lie you told?

“Yes, I will go to a doctor.” 

18: Do you believe in karma?

Yes.

19: What does your URL mean?

It’s a nickname for my name with random letters.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

I’m just weak generally, I’m not strong at all lol. 

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

UGH MELANIE MARTINEZ! 

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

No lol.

23: How do you vent your anger?

I cry.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

Hm nail polishes.

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Texting only.

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

A little bit.

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

Hate: Everything too loud

Love: Melanie Martinez’s voice hehe

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if I wasn’t this insecure and shy.

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Ghosts maybe, aliens no.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

Right: wall

Left: nothing

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

Nothing.

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

A place where I worked before.

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

East.

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Idk I’m gay.

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

Sometimes I’m not even sure if there’s meaning of it.

36: Define Art.

K-12 The film :)

37: Do you believe in luck?

Yes.

38: What’s the weather like right now?

A bit cold.

39: What time is it?

7.35 pm

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

I can’t drive.

41: What was the last book you read?

Eastern by Martin Kay

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

No.

43: Do you have any nicknames?

I don’t like nicknames.

44: What was the last film you saw?

Amélie

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

Slitted my forehead.

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

No.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

Eating and listening to music.

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Straight.

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Oh yes.

50: Do you believe in magic?

No.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

Sometimes.

52: What is your astrological sign?

Aquarius.

53: Do you save money or spend it?

Save some and spend some.

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

Bracelets.

55: Love or lust?

Love.

56: In a relationship?

-

57: How many relationships have you had?

3

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

I can’t.

59: Where were you yesterday?

At home.

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Yes, my Cheshire cat plush.

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

I wear them 24/7.

62: What’s your favourite animal?

Cat.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

Haha does anyone even like me?

64: Where is your best friend?

TOO FAR AWAY, IN AMERICA @sangeki-x

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

@sangeki-x@oteayim@anime--irl@a-laa@mavia-nna

66: What is your heritage?

Um mental breakdown.

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Listening to music.

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

Eh...?

69: Biggest turn ons?

Respect and loyalty. 

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

No way.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

SAVE THE GOD DAMN DOG!

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live.

a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die?

Yes.

b) What do you do with your remaining days?

Probably would spend it with people who are important to me.

c) Would you be afraid?

I wouldn’t care much. But I guess in that situation I would think otherwise.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Trust.

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Decalcomanie by Mamamoo

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

5932

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Honesty, loyalty, communication.

77: How can I win your heart?

Be nice to me and to other people. Be a good and kind person. Care about my bullshits, care about me. Accept me the way I am. Don’t lie to me. Don’t try to control me. Feed me. >.>

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

Yes.

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

That I started to play league. I met so many awesome people there. Even though most of them aren’t part of my life anymore, I’m still happy I had the chance to know them.

80: What size shoes do you wear?

EU 39

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

“Was an awful person, deserved to die.”

82: What is your favourite word?

“Valley”, sounds so good imo.

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

That I don’t have one and I just break everybody’s heart who get close to me.

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

”I’m hungry.””I’m dying.””I’m crying”“I don’t wanna go.””I want chocolate.”“I’m sorry.”“I’m annoying.”

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

Meggyfa by Tamás Horváth

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Blue and black.

87: What is your current desktop picture?

Bewitching Miss Fortune splash art.

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

Me.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

This question lmao.

90: Turn offs?

Lack of hygiene

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Teleport pls.

92: Where are your parents from?

Hungary

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

Can’t I erase my whole life?

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

If it’s like a sleepover, definitely Melanie Martinez. :’D If “SLEEPING” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) then noone.

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Japan

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

I don’t have.

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

Never.

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yes.

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say

I love you bitch you are perfect the way you are.

[gwentoryfics]

I'm feeling really unconfident about my writing at the moment, so I thought I could turn to you for help. you've probably dealt with similar feelings, so would you mind letting me know how you deal with it when you feel like you arent living up to your own expectations? I'm struggling with that to the point that its keeping me from writing altogether

okay i love this question and i have a million things to say about it. i’m gonna throw down a 'keep reading’ button since i have a feeling this may take up quite a bit of space lol

there are two things i want to talk about in regards to this topic: expectations (like you mentioned) and comparisons. i think a lot of stress, self-doubt, and lack of confidence stems from those two things - the expectations we have about our work, and the way we feel about our work compared to those we admire.

when i was in college, i took a class called spirituality & empowerment. it dealt mostly with the topic of finding peace through mastering your mindset. it felt pretty hokey at the time and i didn’t fully commit to the meditation practices and everything else we did, but in the years since taking the class i’ve had a lot of time to reflect on one of the main teachings: you cannot find peace and happiness as long as expectations exist.

to apply this directly to writing:

if you have high expectations for your quality of writing, you will inevitably be disappointed. you are your own worst critic and you will always find flaws with your writing. if perfection is your goal, you will never reach it, and you will forever be frustrated with your perceived inability to write “well.”

completely eliminating expectations from your life is incredibly difficult, if not practically impossible. i’m certainly guilty of still setting expectations for myself. but there are ways to lessen and change those expectations into something more manageable, to actually give yourself a chance at writing something you’ll be happy with.

1. expect that your first draft will be shitty. give yourself permission to write something terrible. don’t stress about sentence structure or word choice - just throw something onto the page and let it be god awful. letting yourself have that shitty first draft releases a lot of the burden to write well and instead lets you focus on just getting the main plot points down. when you stop yourself from analyzing each word choice you make, you open yourself up to more creative thinking - and more possibilities to enhance the plot.

2. expect that your second draft may not be much better. writing is a process and it takes time - much of which is spent rewriting, revising, and editing.

3. expect that your final product will not be perfect. expect that it will instead be “good enough.” because you could spend endless hours making changes to it and still never be satisfied. there is absolutely nothing wrong with “good enough.”

4. expect that even if you set all of these expectations, you still may not be happy with the end result. and that’s okay. i try to set these expectations for myself, and i still am not thrilled with hot for teacher. i think i still have a lot of areas to improve, and there are also some pretty glaring mistakes i’ve made that i might have caught if i had spent more time revising. (specifically issues with wooseok’s suspension - 1. there’s no real point to it, since there’s no plot benefit to him being kept from r&b ensemble. it would have made more sense with my original plot ideas, but i changed some things around and now it doesn’t really matter. and 2. i wrote that he was specifically suspended from extracurricular activities, and r&b ensemble isn’t even an extracurricular! it’s a class that he’s getting credit for!! lol that was just a huge thing that i missed, but now it’s part of the story and i just have to deal with it.)

5. expect that you may not get any response when you post. it’s impossible to control other peoples’ reactions to your writing and you’re only going to stress yourself out more by putting so much importance on something that is out of your control. trust me, i understand how encouraging it is to get a like, a reblog, or even an ask. ideally, if you don’t expect that response, you won’t be disappointed when you don’t get one (but that’s a really difficult expectation to have). to use myself as an example again - i didn’t expect any sort of response when i posted the first part of hft. i had just started up a new blog and had 0 followers (i think that probably helped lol) so i didn’t even think anyone would see it. but then i started getting asks about it, which was awesome! it was incredibly validating and encouraging. but now when i post updates, i expect those asks to come in. and if i don’t get any right away, i start to think it was a flop or people aren’t interested in my story anymore. i basically put all of my validation into receiving asks, which is super stressful. i haven’t totally figured out how to break free of that. just know that you’re not alone in wanting a positive outcome.

basically, the takeaway from those five points is that low/no expectations give you a higher chance of feeling satisfied. by expecting the least, you’re giving yourself the opportunity to 1. be satisfied with any outcome, and 2. be pleasantly surprised by a positive outcome. again, this is a really difficult thing to do, and i’m not sure that anyone is really capable of completely nixing their expectations lol but it’s something to think about at least. consider what expectations you’re setting for yourself specifically, and then try to think of a way that you can flip it into something more positive.

the next thing is comparisons. we’ve all heard time and time again that it is detrimental to compare yourself to others. it’s so easy to read other writers’ works and say to yourself, “my writing is not/will never be this beautiful/creative/intriguing/whatever adjective you prefer.” 

honestly, yeah, you’re right. your writing will never be like theirs. because your writing is unique to you, just as that writer’s work is unique to them. so instead of comparing your work to someone else’s, compare it to your own.

how does this story compare to one you wrote a year ago? how does this draft compare to an earlier draft? are you seeing improvements? if not, where could you focus on growth? take time to analyze your own writing, because the most important thing is that you’re always growing as an artist. 

and of course, it’s totally fine (encouraged, even!) to take inspiration from writers that you love! whenever i feel stuck, i re-read some of my favorite fics to see how other writers handle similar situations. but no matter what inspiration you take, remember to make it into something that is your own.

now when it comes to building confidence in your writing, approach writing like you would a performance (easy analogy for me to make since i’m a musician). you wouldn’t jump on stage unprepared - you would take time to practice your song/dance/performance. the more you practice, the more comfortable you’ll be, and the more confident you’ll feel going into the performance.

so think of each step of your writing process as practice. the more time you spend working on your work, the more comfortable and confident you’ll be with it, and the easier it’ll be for you to share. 

but again, know when enough is enough. don’t spend the next two years working on a 5k fic. be comfortable with your “good enough” stopping point and move on to the next big thing!

lacking confidence in your writing is a really difficult thing to overcome. and i’m not even sure that it can totally be conquered. i’m always nervous to post new parts of hft, and i constantly question if i’m making the right choices regarding character decisions, word usage, and plot points.

i want to leave you with one last thing. i forget who wrote it, but i think i read somewhere about the idea that there is no such thing as bad writing - only unfinished writing. so don’t get stuck thinking that your writing is simply bad. it’s just a work in progress! the key is to recognize when something isn’t as good as it could be, and look at it as an opportunity for improvement instead of a failure. 

you’re approaching your work with a critical eye, and that means you’re already headed in the right direction! you’re willing to acknowledge that your writing may be lacking in some areas. now you just need to have a little faith in your abilities. 

if it counts for anything, i believe in you.

i know this is literally an essay and i apologize for such a lengthy response, but i really hope that this can be at least a little helpful. remember that i’m always here to give you a boost and/or advice when you need it. as a fellow writer, i want to encourage you to keep trying even when things get hard, and to recognize the strengths that you already have. 💕

[memorablecrystalgiftsideas]

Top 5 Christmas Gift Ideas

Do you want to make your loved ones happy this upcoming holiday season? Make the experience an incredible one by giving them memorable Christmas gifts this year.

We understand that the gifting industry is huge and it’s very easy to be overwhelmed with Christmas gift choices. This is the reason why you should try to spice things up a bit and don’t settle for the usual presents. We know that your gift-giving intentions every year are good but sometimes you have to go for something unique. Be bold and don’t be scared to go beyond the gifting norms this festive season. Here are 5 Christmas Gifts that you should absolutely choose from to make the holiday gift-giving experience an unforgettable and captivating one.

1. High definition 3d crystals   

 If you’re looking for personalized gifts that your recipients will perpetually cherish not only from the moment they receive it but every time they see it then don’t hesitate to order 3d photo crystals from 3D Crystal.

Humans are visual by nature. We tend to gravitate towards things that look good and could grab our attention right away. We want something that will capture and spark our interest from the get go and based on experience, we’re very confident that 3d glass pictures can do that. High definition 3d crystals as Christmas gifts will leave them in awe because it’s clean, crisp and posh. Aside from that, the sentimental, magical and thoughtful touch that this aesthetically pleasing gift provides is something that they will appreciate and give them all the right feels.   

There’s no denying that nothing really comes close to the remarkable product quality and irresistible experience that 3D Crystal offers. So if you intend to purchase customized 3d keepsakes for people that you adore and love then make sure it’s from a premium crystal brand. From family members and relatives to friends and colleagues, there is surely a mesmerizing 3d crystal size or design that will make them go wow and take their breath away. This timeless gift idea is perfectly customized and designed to showcase meaningful photos in a stunning and majestic way, whether it’s placed at home, school, office or even inside vehicles. By choosing 3D Crystal, we’re confident that your recipients will have precious memories from striking mementos that will last a lifetime        

The holiday season is definitely one of the best times of the year to passionately show the most important people in your life how much they mean to you. In order to give them a delightful impression that you genuinely do care about them, don’t hold back and choose emotion-provoking 3d crystals from photos to give more meaning to your gift-giving intentions this year. 

2. RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) Carbon Fiber Wallets

Did you know that your credit card number and other private information can be stolen without it physically leaving your wallet? Data theft is rampant nowadays and something that can happen even if fraudsters are right next to you. To ensure that nothing ends up in the wrong hands, you need more than just a simple wallet to shield you from these types of attacks.                                  

As technology continues to evolve, the need to protect our stuff, especially cards, becomes increasingly important. While traditional bifold and trifold wallets might be enough in the past to keep things secure, we could be in trouble in this present day and age if we’re not ready to let go of our old ways and embrace the new. 

This is the reason why it’s now more important than ever to keep important valuables safe using ultra compact private information protectors. The beauty of RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) Carbon Fiber Wallets lies in the fact that this minimalist and innovative product helps secure sensitive information without being breached even when out in public. Amid the sea of typical wallets flooding the market, RFID Carbon Fiber Wallets are an elegant solution for those looking for a sensational product to keep cards safe from RFID scanning.                        

It’s time to embrace innovation and move forward in peace and at ease, especially now that our world is changing at a fast pace. New problems definitely require new solutions so being stuck in what used to be the norm is completely dysfunctional and counterproductive. In order for the nearest and dearest people in your life to adapt with security measures and get protected from data threats of the modern world, don’t hesitate to give them this revolutionary product this holiday season.

3. Foam rollers

The hustle and bustle of the holiday season can make us feel anxious and exhausted. Despite being considered as one of the happiest times of the year, it’s also considered as one of the most stressful one. This is the reason why giving your favorite people high quality foam rollers is an amazing idea to keep their body stress levels at bay.                     

Basically, getting a foam roller is like having a deep tissue massage at the spa without spending a ton of cash. This is something that your recipients will enjoy using wherever they are because it’s made from durable and safe materials. This efficient product, with its firm, prominent ridges and bumps, helps increase blood flow and release tension from stiff  joints and muscles. Apart from that, it’s also scientifically shown to reduce deep muscle tightness which is common during the holiday season.           

Foam rollers are definitely a great gift as they are carefully designed to emulate palm & fingertip pressure. This feature allows this fantastic product to provide relief, recovery and rehabilitation for a variety of ailments such as back pain, joint pain, muscle pain, etc. Its effects are backed up by science so the people on your list are guaranteed to feel a difference in their overworked muscles if they use this product in a gentle and correct manner.

4. Gift cards

Gift cards make awesome gifts because you don’t have to worry about going above your budget. We’re all guilty of overspending from time to time because we can’t control ourselves to spend a little more. Unfortunately, those numbers add up because we end up spending more just to avail something that’s out of our budget in the first place.       

The best way to do it is to decide on a total budget that you’re willing to spend this holiday season. After that, come up with a list of people you want to give something to and decide on a budget breakdown for each person. It’s easier to stay on budget and avoid extra costs by doing it this way.  

Another reason why we suggest gift cards is because it offers flexibility to your recipients They can buy whatever they want as long the product/s they have their eye on is within the gift card budget. However, just make sure that you don’t give the same gift cards for every single one of them. Gift cards from a beauty store will be cool with your mom and sisters but something that your dad and brothers won’t find appealing.  

          Giving gift cards is actually very convenient because it saves you a lot of time and effort. It doesn’t have to be impersonal as long as you put some thought into figuring out which stores your loved ones will likely buy something from using their money. There are countless stores that sell in-store and online gift cards and you just need to do your research and reach out to them to find out if they offer this kind of service. Also, don’t forget to read about the terms and conditions of gift cards you’ll end up purchasing so you’re aware about its expiration date and other important information.

5. Emergency survival kits

Total disasters and hazards can happen in just a blink of an eye. It can happen anytime, anywhere, to anyone. No place and no person is exempted from it. This is the reason why it will be really useful to give emergency survival kits to all the people that mean the most to you. We know you only want what's best for them and part of that is to make sure they are ready and prepared to deal with emergency situations when the need arises.     . 

There is growing interest around disaster preparedness around the world and your loved ones don’t have to be left behind. Give them survival kits this Christmas so you could go to sleep peacefully every night knowing that they have the necessary tools needed to help them stay alive for at least 72 hours until professional help arrives.

The scary thing about natural disasters is that they can come out of nowhere and strike unexpectedly. Give your loved ones the gift of protection and survival by handing them over emergency survival kits as presents this holiday season.  

   We hate to admit it but it’s true that sometimes we all tend to get caught up in all the sales and crazy shopping sprees just to find the perfect Christmas gifts. We understand that this period of the year is indeed a hectic time and the unnecessary hassle of finding the perfect holiday present takes the joy out of the season. This is the reason why it’s best to set your intentions on the thought and meaning behind your gifts instead of being driven to spend your hard earned money on expensive gifts out of peer pressure.        

                                                                                              Want to get your shopping done early and give special gifts that you’re just excited to give as the recipient is to receive? Want to make your gift-giving experience less expensive, less stressful, more convenient and more meaningful this year? Feel free to check out and shop online any product from our Top 5 Christmas Gift recommendations.

P.S. Choose wisely!

[crystalgiftsideas]

Top 5 Christmas Gift Ideas

3d crystal photoDo you want to make your loved ones happy this upcoming holiday season? Make the experience an incredible one by giving them memorable Christmas gifts this year.

We understand that the gifting industry is huge and it’s very easy to be overwhelmed with Christmas gift choices. This is the reason why you should try to spice things up a bit and don’t settle for the usual presents. We know that your gift-giving intentions every year are good but sometimes you have to go for something unique. Be bold and don’t be scared to go beyond the gifting norms this festive season. Here are 5 Christmas Gifts that you should absolutely choose from to make the holiday gift-giving experience an unforgettable and captivating one.

1. High definition 3d crystals

If you’re looking for personalized gifts that your recipients will perpetually cherish not only from the moment they receive it but every time they see it then don’t hesitate to order 3d photo crystals from 3D Crystal.

Humans are visual by nature. We tend to gravitate towards things that look good and could grab our attention right away. We want something that will capture and spark our interest from the get go and based on experience, we’re very confident that 3d glass pictures can do that. High definition 3d crystals as Christmas gifts will leave them in awe because it’s clean, crisp and posh. Aside from that, the sentimental, magical and thoughtful touch that this aesthetically pleasing gift provides is something that they will appreciate and give them all the right feels.

There’s no denying that nothing really comes close to the remarkable product quality and irresistible experience that 3D Crystal offers. So if you intend to purchase customized 3d keepsakes for people that you adore and love then make sure it’s from a premium crystal brand. From family members and relatives to friends and colleagues, there is surely a mesmerizing 3d crystal size or design that will make them go wow and take their breath away. This timeless gift idea is perfectly customized and designed to showcase meaningful photos in a stunning and majestic way, whether it’s placed at home, school, office or even inside vehicles. By choosing 3D Crystal, we’re confident that your recipients will have precious memories from striking mementos that will last a lifetime        

The holiday season is definitely one of the best times of the year to passionately show the most important people in your life how much they mean to you. In order to give them a delightful impression that you genuinely do care about them, don’t hold back and choose emotion-provoking 3d crystals from photos to give more meaning to your gift-giving intentions this year.        .                        

2. RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) Carbon Fiber Wallets

Did you know that your credit card number and other private information can be stolen without it physically leaving your wallet? Data theft is rampant nowadays and something that can happen even if fraudsters are right next to you. To ensure that nothing ends up in the wrong hands, you need more than just a simple wallet to shield you from these types of attacks.                                  

As technology continues to evolve, the need to protect our stuff, especially cards, becomes increasingly important. While traditional bifold and trifold wallets might be enough in the past to keep things secure, we could be in trouble in this present day and age if we’re not ready to let go of our old ways and embrace the new.

This is the reason why it’s now more important than ever to keep important valuables safe using ultra compact private information protectors. The beauty of RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) Carbon Fiber Wallets lies in the fact that this minimalist and innovative product helps secure sensitive information without being breached even when out in public. Amid the sea of typical wallets flooding the market, RFID Carbon Fiber Wallets are an elegant solution for those looking for a sensational product to keep cards safe from RFID scanning.

It’s time to embrace innovation and move forward in peace and at ease, especially now that our world is changing at a fast pace. New problems definitely require new solutions so being stuck in what used to be the norm is completely dysfunctional and counterproductive. In order for the nearest and dearest people in your life to adapt with security measures and get protected from data threats of the modern world, don’t hesitate to give them this revolutionary product this holiday season.

3. Foam rollers

The hustle and bustle of the holiday season can make us feel anxious and exhausted. Despite being considered as one of the happiest times of the year, it’s also considered as one of the most stressful one. This is the reason why giving your favorite people high quality foam rollers is an amazing idea to keep their body stress levels at bay.                    

Basically, getting a foam roller is like having a deep tissue massage at the spa without spending a ton of cash. This is something that your recipients will enjoy using wherever they are because it’s made from durable and safe materials. This efficient product, with its firm, prominent ridges and bumps, helps increase blood flow and release tension from stiff  joints and muscles. Apart from that, it’s also scientifically shown to reduce deep muscle tightness which is common during the holiday season.          

Foam rollers are definitely a great gift as they are carefully designed to emulate palm & fingertip pressure. This feature allows this fantastic product to provide relief, recovery and rehabilitation for a variety of ailments such as back pain, joint pain, muscle pain, etc. Its effects are backed up by science so the people on your list are guaranteed to feel a difference in their overworked muscles if they use this product in a gentle and correct manner.  

4. Gift cards

Gift cards make awesome gifts because you don’t have to worry about going above your budget. We’re all guilty of overspending from time to time because we can’t control ourselves to spend a little more. Unfortunately, those numbers add up because we end up spending more just to avail something that’s out of our budget in the first place.      

The best way to do it is to decide on a total budget that you’re willing to spend this holiday season. After that, come up with a list of people you want to give something to and decide on a budget breakdown for each person. It’s easier to stay on budget and avoid extra costs by doing it this way.  

Another reason why we suggest gift cards is because it offers flexibility to your recipients They can buy whatever they want as long the product/s they have their eye on is within the gift card budget. However, just make sure that you don’t give the same gift cards for every single one of them. Gift cards from a beauty store will be cool with your mom and sisters but something that your dad and brothers won’t find appealing.  

Giving gift cards is actually very convenient because it saves you a lot of time and effort. It doesn’t have to be impersonal as long as you put some thought into figuring out which stores your loved ones will likely buy something from using their money. There are countless stores that sell in-store and online gift cards and you just need to do your research and reach out to them to find out if they offer this kind of service. Also, don’t forget to read about the terms and conditions of gift cards you’ll end up purchasing so you’re aware about its expiration date and other important information.    

5. Emergency survival kits

Total disasters and hazards can happen in just a blink of an eye. It can happen anytime, anywhere, to anyone. No place and no person is exempted from it. This is the reason why it will be really useful to give emergency survival kits to all the people that mean the most to you. We know you only want what’s best for them and part of that is to make sure they are ready and prepared to deal with emergency situations when the need arises.     .

There is growing interest around disaster preparedness around the world and your loved ones don’t have to be left behind. Give them survival kits this Christmas so you could go to sleep peacefully every night knowing that they have the necessary tools needed to help them stay alive for at least 72 hours until professional help arrives.

The scary thing about natural disasters is that they can come out of nowhere and strike unexpectedly. Give your loved ones the gift of protection and survival by handing them over emergency survival kits as presents this holiday season.  

We hate to admit it but it’s true that sometimes we all tend to get caught up in all the sales and crazy shopping sprees just to find the perfect Christmas gifts. We understand that this period of the year is indeed a hectic time and the unnecessary hassle of finding the perfect holiday present takes the joy out of the season. This is the reason why it’s best to set your intentions on the thought and meaning behind your gifts instead of being driven to spend your hard earned money on expensive gifts out of peer pressure.        

Want to get your shopping done early and give special gifts that you’re just excited to give as the recipient is to receive? Want to make your gift-giving experience less expensive, less stressful, more convenient and more meaningful this year? Feel free to check out and shop online any product from our Top 5 Christmas Gift recommendations.

P.S. Choose wisely!                                                

[icustomizedgiftlove]

Top 5 Christmas Gift Ideas

Do you want to make your loved ones happy this upcoming holiday season? Make the experience an incredible one by giving them memorable Christmas gifts this year.

We understand that the gifting industry is huge and it’s very easy to be overwhelmed with Christmas gift choices. This is the reason why you should try to spice things up a bit and don’t settle for the usual presents. We know that your gift-giving intentions every year are good but sometimes you have to go for something unique. Be bold and don’t be scared to go beyond the gifting norms this festive season. Here are 5 Christmas Gifts that you should absolutely choose from to make the holiday gift-giving experience an unforgettable and captivating one.

1. High definition 3d crystals

If you’re looking for personalized gifts that your recipients will perpetually cherish not only from the moment they receive it but every time they see it then don’t hesitate to order 3d photo crystals from 3D Crystal.

Humans are visual by nature. We tend to gravitate towards things that look good and could grab our attention right away. We want something that will capture and spark our interest from the get go and based on experience, we’re very confident that 3d glass pictures can do that. High definition 3d crystals as Christmas gifts will leave them in awe because it’s clean, crisp and posh. Aside from that, the sentimental, magical and thoughtful touch that this aesthetically pleasing gift provides is something that they will appreciate and give them all the right feels.

There’s no denying that nothing really comes close to the remarkable product quality and irresistible experience that 3D Crystal offers. So if you intend to purchase customized 3d keepsakes for people that you adore and love then make sure it’s from a premium crystal brand. From family members and relatives to friends and colleagues, there is surely a mesmerizing 3d crystal size or design that will make them go wow and take their breath away. This timeless gift idea is perfectly customized and designed to showcase meaningful photos in a stunning and majestic way, whether it’s placed at home, school, office or even inside vehicles. By choosing 3D Crystal, we’re confident that your recipients will have precious memories from striking mementos that will last a lifetime        

The holiday season is definitely one of the best times of the year to passionately show the most important people in your life how much they mean to you. In order to give them a delightful impression that you genuinely do care about them, don’t hold back and choose emotion-provoking 3d crystals from photos to give more meaning to your gift-giving intentions this year.        .                        

2. RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) Carbon Fiber Wallets

Did you know that your credit card number and other private information can be stolen without it physically leaving your wallet? Data theft is rampant nowadays and something that can happen even if fraudsters are right next to you. To ensure that nothing ends up in the wrong hands, you need more than just a simple wallet to shield you from these types of attacks.                                  

As technology continues to evolve, the need to protect our stuff, especially cards, becomes increasingly important. While traditional bifold and trifold wallets might be enough in the past to keep things secure, we could be in trouble in this present day and age if we’re not ready to let go of our old ways and embrace the new. 

This is the reason why it’s now more important than ever to keep important valuables safe using ultra compact private information protectors. The beauty of RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) Carbon Fiber Wallets lies in the fact that this minimalist and innovative product helps secure sensitive information without being breached even when out in public. Amid the sea of typical wallets flooding the market, RFID Carbon Fiber Wallets are an elegant solution for those looking for a sensational product to keep cards safe from RFID scanning. 

It’s time to embrace innovation and move forward in peace and at ease, especially now that our world is changing at a fast pace. New problems definitely require new solutions so being stuck in what used to be the norm is completely dysfunctional and counterproductive. In order for the nearest and dearest people in your life to adapt with security measures and get protected from data threats of the modern world, don’t hesitate to give them this revolutionary product this holiday season.

3. Foam rollers

The hustle and bustle of the holiday season can make us feel anxious and exhausted. Despite being considered as one of the happiest times of the year, it’s also considered as one of the most stressful one. This is the reason why giving your favorite people high quality foam rollers is an amazing idea to keep their body stress levels at bay.                     

Basically, getting a foam roller is like having a deep tissue massage at the spa without spending a ton of cash. This is something that your recipients will enjoy using wherever they are because it’s made from durable and safe materials. This efficient product, with its firm, prominent ridges and bumps, helps increase blood flow and release tension from stiff  joints and muscles. Apart from that, it’s also scientifically shown to reduce deep muscle tightness which is common during the holiday season.           

Foam rollers are definitely a great gift as they are carefully designed to emulate palm & fingertip pressure. This feature allows this fantastic product to provide relief, recovery and rehabilitation for a variety of ailments such as back pain, joint pain, muscle pain, etc. Its effects are backed up by science so the people on your list are guaranteed to feel a difference in their overworked muscles if they use this product in a gentle and correct manner.   

4. Gift cards

Gift cards make awesome gifts because you don’t have to worry about going above your budget. We’re all guilty of overspending from time to time because we can’t control ourselves to spend a little more. Unfortunately, those numbers add up because we end up spending more just to avail something that’s out of our budget in the first place.       

The best way to do it is to decide on a total budget that you’re willing to spend this holiday season. After that, come up with a list of people you want to give something to and decide on a budget breakdown for each person. It’s easier to stay on budget and avoid extra costs by doing it this way.  

Another reason why we suggest gift cards is because it offers flexibility to your recipients They can buy whatever they want as long the product/s they have their eye on is within the gift card budget. However, just make sure that you don’t give the same gift cards for every single one of them. Gift cards from a beauty store will be cool with your mom and sisters but something that your dad and brothers won’t find appealing.  

          Giving gift cards is actually very convenient because it saves you a lot of time and effort. It doesn’t have to be impersonal as long as you put some thought into figuring out which stores your loved ones will likely buy something from using their money. There are countless stores that sell in-store and online gift cards and you just need to do your research and reach out to them to find out if they offer this kind of service. Also, don’t forget to read about the terms and conditions of gift cards you’ll end up purchasing so you’re aware about its expiration date and other important information.    

5. Emergency survival kits   

Total disasters and hazards can happen in just a blink of an eye. It can happen anytime, anywhere, to anyone. No place and no person is exempted from it. This is the reason why it will be really useful to give emergency survival kits to all the people that mean the most to you. We know you only want what's best for them and part of that is to make sure they are ready and prepared to deal with emergency situations when the need arises.     . 

There is growing interest around disaster preparedness around the world and your loved ones don’t have to be left behind. Give them survival kits this Christmas so you could go to sleep peacefully every night knowing that they have the necessary tools needed to help them stay alive for at least 72 hours until professional help arrives.

The scary thing about natural disasters is that they can come out of nowhere and strike unexpectedly. Give your loved ones the gift of protection and survival by handing them over emergency survival kits as presents this holiday season.  

   We hate to admit it but it’s true that sometimes we all tend to get caught up in all the sales and crazy shopping sprees just to find the perfect Christmas gifts. We understand that this period of the year is indeed a hectic time and the unnecessary hassle of finding the perfect holiday present takes the joy out of the season. This is the reason why it’s best to set your intentions on the thought and meaning behind your gifts instead of being driven to spend your hard earned money on expensive gifts out of peer pressure.        

                                                                                              Want to get your shopping done early and give special gifts that you’re just excited to give as the recipient is to receive? Want to make your gift-giving experience less expensive, less stressful, more convenient and more meaningful this year? Feel free to check out and shop online any product from our Top 5 Christmas Gift recommendations.

P.S. Choose wisely!                                                            .       

[just-a-freaking-booknerd]

Throne of Glass.....I just.....I can’t anymore.

I wanted this to be a new favorite series and I wanted to be more hyped but....I’m not. The first 3 books were super entertaining and I had grown to really enjoy some of these characters, but then it all went to hell. I can see why people enjoyed this series, but it just wasn’t for me.

Please keep in mind that these are just my own thoughts and feelings and yes, I know they’re not perfect. I’m not trying to offend anyone, so don’t @me

SPOILERS

Aelin is one of the most obnoxious characters I’ve ever read about. At first I thought it’d be fine and she’d hopefully get better as the series grew, but she just got WORSE! She lied to everyone all the time and was extremely arrogant and snarky.

Rowan....Rowan Rowan Rowan. Where to begin. I can hardly remember a thing about him because he was just another model-status love interest with a sad backstory. He was a jealous, territorial asshole and I didn’t care whether he lived or died in the end. That’s it.

Their relationship was really annoying. I got so bored during kingdom of ash that I started counting how many times they used any variation of the word ‘mate’ toward each other. ONLY with Aelin and Rowan. I got over 100. 🤮. And what was with that smut she threw into EoS? No thanks! If I never read someone describe a penis as “velvet wrapped steel” again I will be eternally grateful

Dorian was a character I loved at the beginning, but as the story went on I kind of lost interest. The only thing that kept me going was his journey with his magic and the fact that he was chilling with Manon.

Manon was awesome! I loved her story, from black beak heir to Queen of the witches. She’s such a badass! I’m so happy that she was able to break off from her grandmother’s ways and recognize her true self. I also really loved her story with the thirteen. I must admit, I don’t really ship Dorian with Manon, and that’s mostly because I was not happy about Manon being turned into “the love interest for Dorian” during EoS. I’m so glad that turned around.

I absolutely LOVED Chaol in book #1 but he quickly grew to be my least favorite character until ‘Tower of Dawn’. He acted like such a butthurt fool throughout this series and it just got exhausting! I’m glad he finally grew out of the King’s mindset and I’m so happy that he ended up with Yrene.

I knew Yrene (and most of the people from the assassin’s blade) would make more appearances in the series, but I was the most satisfied with how she turned up. I was so proud of how she’d grown and achieved with the healers and I absolutely adored her story with Chaol. I really enjoyed them as a couple and they ended up being one of the only things pushing me through ‘kingdom of ash’.

I didn’t like Aedion. I never really did to be honest. There was kind of this point in QoS and EoS where he was okay, but then he just turned out to be such an asshole. I know he’s been through a lot and anyone on his situation would probably act the same, but I still cannot stand his existence. He’s just like Aelin and that just ain’t it. I really didn’t like how they mentioned he was bi ONCE and then it was never spoken of again. What’s up with that? Not my fav.

Lysandra turned out to be one of my favorite characters. Though her shape shifting abilities totally came out of nowhere. I enjoyed seeing her friendship grow with Aelin and watching her grow and become her own confident and independent self. Once again, I did not ship this couple. I didn’t feel that Aedion deserved Lysandra and she should’ve just turned him down and left it at that. He treated her like such GARBAGE and then he takes it all back like that after they almost die. He hardly has any consequences for everything he did to her. She still chose him in the end.

Another favorite character of mine was Elide. I know lots of people find her boring but I adore her. She was strong and she made it through everything without magic. Though it is a shame that SJM didn’t expand of her witch heritage. I love her determination and sass. When she went and got the first job she’d ever applied for? Iconic. When she went into Doranelle and figured out how to save Aelin? A queen. We stan. My biggest problem was when she refused to forgive Lorcan even after he explained everything.

Lorcan was my favorite of all the guys. I know he’s NOT perfect, and I know he’s just as territorial and jealous as all the other males, but I just have a thing for the dark brooding guys being a total softy for the person they love. He deserves all the happiness after what he’s been through. You can probably tell that Elide and Lorcan are my favorite couple of the series. They’re not perfect, but I live for their story and I love the way it turned out. Also Lord Lorcan Lochan? An icon.

Fenrys didn’t stand out to me. He was just kind of chillin until he and Aelin were taken to Maeve, then it turned into Fenrys having a super obnoxious friendship with Aelin which consisted of them being rude and making crude comments. I liked how they were strong for each other before they escaped, and way to go Fenrys for breaking the bond, but after that it wasn’t the best.

#justiceforGravriel because that man deserved better. He was so chill and helpful. All he wanted was a relationship with his son, and when he got it he died immediately. What’s up with that shit?

Nesryn was boring. I don’t know why we followed her around at all in the last book. I enjoyed her POV in ‘tower of dawn’ but that’s pretty much it. I feel like she deserved to get more character development than she got and it really sucks that we didn’t get to see it.

Sartaq is basically the same. I didn’t feel any connection to his character at all and I didn’t see the point of him other than being Nesryn’s love interest.

I don’t really like SJM’s writing in this series. The dialogue between characters made me cringe so much and she uses the same few phrases over, and over, and over. I can’t even tell you how many times she compared someone to an Asp. It wasn’t necessarily bad, it just isn’t for me

The romance in this book kind of sucked. EVERYONE had to be a couple by the end. Not even the side characters could stay single. I hated that Aelin had a new love interest every five seconds in the first half of this series. She fell in love with literally every guy she knew! Sarah j Maas could have spun it to be a pathological need that Aelin has to be loved, and to love anything that loves her back, but alas. It would have been a really interesting thing to see her work on and overcome but all we got was a new boyfriend every book and then some random faerie smut when she finally stuck with one of them. And why does it ALWAYS have to be ‘mates’ in SJM’s books? I find it so unromantic. It kind of makes everything they went through to be together.....pointless. What’s the big deal with all of it if they’re mates and they’d just end up together anyway? Maybe that’s just me🤣

  Okay I should probably get into the actual books. Starting off with Throne of Glads, I was intrigued, I was excited, and it simply did not deliver. It was still enjoyable for the most part, but it did not feel like it matched the description at all.

   It would’ve been cool if SJM had started off with more Endovier, because throughout this series we hear about it and they talk about how awful it was, but we never actually see it. Kind of disappointing. I called who the bad guy was and we all knew Celaena would win, so really all I had was the wyrdmarks.

   Nehemiah didn’t really stand out at first, and I didn’t like how fast her “friendship” formed with Celaena.

I think that there was supposed to be some kind of love triangle between Celaena, Dorian and Chaol, but it wasn’t very noticeable. She was all about Dorian and Chaol was just kind of there. The final contest wasn’t that tense or entertaining because, hello, there’s seven other books obviously she lives and becomes the champion. 

  So, she lives and breaks it off with Dorian and that was that. Not my fav but I was entertained and left wanting more of her story, so I ended up giving it around 3.75 stars

  The Assassin’s Blade was alright. Obviously just a setup for characters we’d need to know about for future books and a little of her backstory. I liked Sam a lot but didn’t really ship him with Celaena. Everyone already knew Arobynn was the bad guy so that was no surprise. 4 stars for the novella collection as a whole

   Crown of Midnight was probably my favorite at that point. I loved how Celaena chose to defy the King and started working with Archer. Even though he was totally sus and I thought it was obvious that he was up to something.

   My heart was broken for Celaena after Nehemiah’s death, and I absolutely hated that Chaol and Celaena never really got a chance to be together. If Chaol has just done the *smart* thing and told Celaena, maybe he wouldn’t have ruined it for everyone.

   I will be honest, Dorian having powers came out of the blue. Out of all the obvious things that happened, I didn’t call him being magical. It is really great amd it added some much needed tension.

       The ending was crazy. Celaena is Fae. That’s so crazy! SJM has hinted at Celaena having powers, but I never expected her being full on fae! Of course then Chaol has to be a butthole about it all, but at least he tried to save her by shipping her off to Wendlyn. Even though it wasn’t the best idea. And then.....the best plot twist ever....Celaena is Aelin. The entire time I thought Celaena would join forces with Aelin, so you can imagine how absolutely shocked I was. And so, she goes to wendlyn to train with fae and that is that.

i gave this book a very low 4 stars

  Heir of Fire, we get to Wendlyn and Celaena is just doing nothing and letting herself waste away. It was really annoying to watch ngl. She goes to Maeve, Maeve makes her train with Rowan, Celaena has a lady boner for Rowan, and that’s really all I remember from the first part of this book.

   Celaena was begging for someone to knock her on her ass, so Rowan being there was nice. Watching her deal with her powers toward the end was really entertaining and I loved the introduction of the Valg men.

   I actually did enjoy the climax of Celaena’s storyline in this book. The flashbacks and her breaking through that wall she had set up and finding out Rowan was her carranam was great. Then the end with Maeve and how Celaena convinced her to set Rowan free was just *chefs kiss* and at this point I shipped Rowan and Celaena so hard. There was a good set up for the cadre to come into play again so I was really looking forward to that.

  The introduction to Manon Blackbeak was great. I was instantly in love and so excited to see this character grow in future books. I could already tell that she wasn’t going to be a bad guy and she might even have an arc similar to Zuko from Avatar. The thirteen were so great and I loved abraxos. It was perfect to get me out of the slump with Celaena’s chapters.

   Dorian and Chaol’s POV wasn’t the best, though their finale was probably my favorite. I didn’t like Aedion from the start, and even after he was revealed to be a rebel I still couldn’t shake my dislike for his character.

  Dorian and Sorscha were so cute! They did not deserve what happened to them. Dorian deserves happiness and all he got was pain and a Valg demon living in his body. Their finale was so emotional and I’m not ashamed to say I cried. I did not expect Sorscha to actually be killed so my heart was absolutely breaking.

 This was by far one of my favorite books of the series. I gave it 4 stars

  Queen of Shadows was my favorite of this entire series. I was never bored with the plot and it was just a really fun story. My big issue was that her first interaction with Arobynn didn’t go at all like I thought it would. I just expected a little bit more. 

  Seeing Dorian with the Valg broke my heart. I hated how he suffered all that time and no one knew to help him. SJM really should have waited to reveal that he was still alive for a little while. It would’ve made things more tense when they were having the whole ‘do we kill him, do we not’ conversation.

  This was the only book where I actually enjoyed Aedion’s presence. His reunion with Aelin was great, though I don’t think they’d act like that after being apart for 10 years. Finding out Gavriel is Aedion’s father was so random and I did t really care for it, but at least we knew the cadre would have to make another appearance eventually. 

   Lysandra came out of nowhere in this book. I loved it. I have so much respect for her after reading her full story and seeing everything she’s been through and everything she’s done for Evangeline. I love that Aelin let Lysandra get her revenge on Arobynn in the end. Though I think his death wasn’t fitting for everything he’d done to them both. Her powers came out of nowhere but I love them anyway. A shapeshifter, how cool is that? 

  The story line with Manon and Elide was so wonderful in this book. Again, we get more of Manon questioning her grandmother and we can see that she’ll split off from the iron teeth mindset eventually. I loved how Kaltain was able to break free and get her revenge on Erawan and allowing Elide to escape. It was so awesome. The worlds finally collided in this book and it did not disappoint! The fight between Manon and Aelin had me on the edge of my seat!

   I loved the entire thing. The end of this book had me completely shook. The revelation of Perrington’s true identity was like🤯. Really, the entire ending of this book had me like🤯. I love love loved it all. From the freeing of magic to the set up for Chaol and Nesryn’s journey and Kaltain destroying part of Morath. My favorite book of the series! 4.5 stars

  Empire of Storms is where it all went to shit. I was bored of Aelin’s group the entire time and all I looked forward to was Elide/Lorcan’s chapters. With the exception of Manon’s first chapters with the Thirteen and the battle with Lysandra turning into a sea dragon, I was pretty bored until the end. 

  The most frustrating bit of this entire book was that CHAOL WAS BARELY MENTIONED. Like???? SJM cripples him and then doesn’t follow up with anything? How messed up is that? I hated it so much. Why not just kill him if you don’t want to write about him anymore? It’s stupid but I digress. 

   You best believe Manon and Asterin has me SOBBING in those chapters. I knew this would be the final straw and that Manon would have to choose to leave the Blackbeaks. Sadly, after she left and we find out she isn’t dead, I was bored with her for the rest of the story. It kind of felt like she was only there so she could screw Dorian. I really didn’t like that whole situation. There could’ve been more progression for her character but we get nothing but disappointment.

    Fenrys and Gavriel were just chillin in this book I guess. Nothing about them really stuck out to me. Just the angsty Gavriel/Aedion situation. And did they forget that there was supposed to be another member of the cadre? Is that just me? They’ve completely forgotten about Roland at this point too. 

  The rest of the book was boring until they meet up with Lorcan and Elide. This book is when I started disliking Rowan/Aelin relationship because all the could think about was doing the do and it consumed the entire middle section. I don’t know why SJM decided this book needed to be full of fae porn and jealous men, but here we are.

  The ending was the best part of this story. We figure out how to get rid of Erawan but it requires Aelin’s entire being. Yay tension, even though we know SJM isn’t going to kill her main character. Nobody important has died anyway.

   I hate that Lorcan brought Maeve to them, but I understand it. The only chance at happiness he has might die soon. Desperate times call for Lorcan’s desperate measures I guess.

  The scene on the beach broke my heart. We find out that Rowan and Aelin are actually mates (yay? I guess) and then they get separated by Maeve. It sucked. And I hated everyone’s reactions. Freaking Aedion is such an asshole to Lysandra after he figures out the plan. Does he not realize that Lysandra is sacrifi cing her freedom to play queen for Aelin? And Elide’s anger toward Lorcan. My otp is once again ruined by SJM. 

   Aelin is snatched, we find out she married Rowan, and then all of Aelin’s old friends show up like she’d been hinting at all book. The end. This book was such a disappointment for me and I ended up giving it 3.5 stars.

  Tower of Dawn is where it’s at. I thought I would hate it because I didn’t really want an entire book dedicated to Nesryn and Chaol, but it became a favorite. I loved it SO much. It was a great break from all that angsty crap that had been happening with the rest of the gang. 

  Out of all the characters from The Assassin’s Blade, I wanted to see Yrene the most. I needed more content for her and I’m so happy with what we got. Yrene was so fun to follow and it was great to see that she is making her dreams come true.

   I immediately knew that Chaol and Nesryn wouldn’t last. They never made a good pair in my opinion. I’m glad they decided to go their separate ways (at least in a romantic sense) because they both needed more. Nesryn finally gets her happy ending with Sartaq, even if they’re both dull as dirt for the rest of the series.

  Who else saw Yrene and Chaol’s relationship coming from a mile away??? I know I did.  I think they’re great together! They’re my second favorite relationship of the series. In fact, my favorite scene of the entire book was Yrene getting Chaol to walk around the room. It was so cute! Cute and....hot? it was hot.

Chaol finally started to see things for what they were and he became less idiotic. We stan. How is it that SJM takes some of my favorite characters and makes them trash and then somehow redeems my most hated characters?

  The rukhin clans were a really interesting addition to the story. They were really entertaining and i just knew that theyd fight with Aelin

   I was NOT expecting the Maeve plot twist. That made everything so much worse for Aelin and the cadre. I was super excited to see how she’d play in with the rest of the story. I loved that SJM made a way for the Valg to be destroyed and I just knew that Yrene would be able to play a bigger part in Kingdom of Ash. Finding out that the princess was possessed by Valg was such a surprise and I really loved it.

   My biggest gripes about this book were that Falkan coming back into the story AND being Lysandra’s long lost uncle, and the fact that Chaol isn’t really healed. How disappointing. After all that work he’ll never be fully healed again. Groooossss. I gave this book 4 stars😂

  Here we are....the worst book of the series, Kingdom of Ash. This book only had 450-500 pages of good content, WHY did she make it that long? I lost interest at around 150 pages and I wasn’t that into it until around page 600. That’s so sad.

   Aelin and Rowan ain’t it. I counted how many times they used any variation of the word ‘mate’ *ONLY* in the chapters from Rowan or Aelin’s POV. It was over 100. Why. Let’s calm down and never even think of that word ever again. By the end of the book I was kind of hoping one of them would die, because then at least their relationship would be interesting again, but no. We were left with the most boring relationship of all time.

 I CANNOT stand that Lysandra and Aedion still lended up together. He does not deserve her. She sacrificed her freedom to give the people of terrasin hope and she was willing to live a fake life for all of them, and yet Aedion treats her like garbage because he wasn’t part of the secrets club. Bullshit. It took her almost DYING for him to be sorry. Disgusting.

  Lysandra is such a queen but her entire existence for the first half of this book is trying to get Aedion to acknowledge her. Not a fan. And even though I love her, I find it very unlikely that she never died. She and Aedion probably should’ve been dead in every single battle that happened during this book. 

   I loved Yrene and Chaol in this book. Chaol became a favorite character once again and Yrene was a boss ass bitch. I’m so happy she got her moment of glory by killing Erawan in the end. They deserve the best and I’m happy they’re starting a family.

   Lorcan and Elide were once again my favorites. I’m happy for them and I loved them in this book. Though I do feel that Elide should’ve been given a chance to do more in this book. Idk. 

   MANON. OH. MY. GOSH. I STAN. I loved her arc sooooooo much. Her becoming queen of the witches was magnificent and I loved it all so much. She’s another all time favorite of this series and her relationship with the thirteen was amazing. I cried so hard when they all made that sacrifice for Terrasen. They were wonderful. 10/10. Beautiful. She can finally lead the witches back to the wastes, it’s just really sad that the thirteen will never get to see it.

    Dorian was better in this book, though I totally thought he would die. He should’ve died. That would’ve been a death that hit their groups hard. Great motivation I think. We all knew he’d succeed at Morath, because reasons. I did like that but about him shapeshifting though. It’s really great that he gets some closure for his dad as well. His name was Dorian. i cry.

    Fenrys was good in this book. Gavriel was fine too, though his ending was not appreciated. I get it, he was the expendable one, but come on. He’d just gotten a chance at a relationship with Aedion and then he died. What is up with that? And hey, they FINALLY remember that there was another member of the cadre. Everyone forgot about his existence. I don’t even remember his name. 

  I didn’t see the point in Nesryn’s POVs. It was extremely boring. I didn’t like any of the Kaghan family.

We had an alright beginning for this book. Obviously they get Aelin back super fast, then they go and meet up with Chaol in Anielle just in time because they just so happen to run into some of the Kaghan’s other children. Speaking of convenient events, I will now give you a summary of the middle of this book.

Bad people threaten to destroy everyone, good thing happens and everyone is saved. Bad thing happens again, we get a miracle (except for that one time with the witch tower) and everyone is saved and now there’s more time for Aelin to save everyone. That’s all it was.

We got to see Nox again like twice after 5 whole books so that was nice I guess. I don’t even think he gets to see the real Aelin again.

   It was obvious that Aelin wasn’t going to die forming the Lock, I don’t think SJM would ever kill her main character. Though her traveling through the worlds might’ve been my favorite part. Also.....HELLO? THAT WAS TOTALLY FEYRE AND RHYSAND ON THAT MOUNTAIN, RIGHT?!?!? Is she pregnant? Omggggg. Despite my dislike of ToG, I really liked ACoTaR when I read it so I was really excited for that Easter egg. 

 The final battle was good. She destroyed Maeve even though her powers were lost and Yrene killed Erawan. I liked that scene at the end where we see all the little flames and know that the land is blessed. Very nice. Very full circle. Happily ever after for everyone. We stan Lord Lorcan Lochan. And that is that. It’s finally over. After two months of just Throne of Glass, I’m finished forever. 3 stars

I’m very disappointed with these books and I don’t think I’ll ever reread it or recommend it to anyone . I truly thought that this would be a new favorite series, but it just didn’t work out. I think the reason I liked ACoTaR more than ToG is because that series didn’t have as many books so SJM didn’t have enough time to ruin it.

I can totally see why some people would love this series, and that’s cool. Like what you like! This is just an opinion.

If anyone reads this, thanks for putting up with my rant😂

[malviie]

A Wicked Match Ch. 3

Summary: Mal is told about the times Evie and her were acting like a couple; the AKs learn about Mal saving Evie from the curse of her mother's scepter.

AO3 | Ch 1, 2

It took a moment to respond, but in the time that it did, Mal's gaze had returned to watching Evie walk away. "I don't think I ever tried to deny that. Not to someone else, anyways," she muttered.

Her attention lingered on the other girl until she felt a grape hit her cheek. She glared at Jay, whose body shook with laughter.

"C'mon, let loose and have some fun," he managed to say in between chuckles.

"We can let loose later," she said, taking his spoon from him. "Evie wants us four to hang out tonight. You in?"

"Is it easy to steal candy from a baby?" Jay asked in return, like the answer was obvious.

"Awesome. Come by our room when you get out of practice." Pretty much ending the conversation there, she Mal used the spoon she'd taken from him and started to actually eat what was on the tray in front of her.

A few minutes passed by in silence as they ate, and the other four soon made their ways back to the table. Jane and Lonnie had neat plates, Carlos had a mountain of plates carefully balanced on each other and had somehow found Dude when he'd gone to get food, and Evie came back with a single plate, covered in her favorite foods.

"So," Mal started, talking around a mouthful of strawberry. "How're we supposed to talk about... this?"

"Talk about what?" Lonnie asked, finally taking interest in the change of air around Mal and Evie. Jane looked over when she asked, and while Carlos didn't look, it was obvious he and Dude were listening.

"M didn't realize I liked her until we matched on Wicked today," Evie explained, smirking when Mal scowled at her.

Lonnie snorted at that and Jane giggled just a bit.

"Better late than never," Carlos commented, sipping on a juice he'd grabbed whilst petting Dude.

"Gee, thanks," Mal muttered, stabbing at her plate of salad. "Seriously, though, how does everyone else know?"

"Mal, you guys were so touchy at Cotillion. Even after Uma left, Evie walked you down and you guys were just so close," Lonnie remarked. "It was kind of hard not to notice. Unless you're Ben or you, I guess."

"There was also when Evie dragged you away from Ben a couple of days before Cotillion. I had to talk to him and I saw. And how Evie stuck up for you with the whole Zevon making you act bad thing," Jane added. There was a note of confidence in her voice she hadn't previously had when talking to Mal, and she did have to admit she was happy the girl wasn't as scared of her anymore.

"When we sang Space Between on the Isle. If the timing has been a little better, I think we might've kissed. But we were super close and we touched foreheads and, well, basically that whole song was us telling each other how we'd always be there." Evie hesitated on saying more.

"E?"

"Yeah, sorry," she said, shaking her head clear of her thoughts. "Before we had come to get you, I told Ben to make sure I didn't get stuck on the Isle again. But when I was with you, I was fully prepared to give up Auradon."

"I... I didn't know you told Ben that. I knew you loved Auradon, but I didn't realize-"

"I know you didn't," Evie interrupted. "That's not your fault."

"Okay," Mal conceded. "What else?"

"The nicknames," Jay pitched in. "E and M. You guys don't call Carlos C or me J... the letter, not my full name."

The group laughed at that, Mal and Evie most of all.

"And how do you know we don't call you by the letter? There's no vocal distinction," Evie said. chortling into her hand.

Mal could feel her cheeks warm ever so slightly, not enough for it to be noticeable by the others, but enough for her heart to flutter at the sound of Evie's laugh. She beamed at her group of friends and laughed along until it died out and the conversation continued.

"There was also the thing with the Dragon's Eye," Carlos told them. Lonnie and Jane looked on confused, so he explained. "Back on the Isle, before we came here, Mal's mother made her go to this little island inside the barrier. At the time, only Mal and Jay were really friends, if you could even call it that."

"Mm, I'd say we were more like associates. Not enemies, but definitely not friends. Not like we are now, anyways," Mal said.

"Yeah, we just stole and pulled pranks together. Or stole from and pranked each other. It was all the same thing back then."

"Right. So anyways, we all traveled to the island to get Maleficent's scepter- the Dragon's Eye. The thing was, there was a curse on it. The first person to touch it would fall to sleep for a thousand years."

Jane's eyes went large, and Lonnie stopped eating. Mal looked down at her own meal, still feeling slivers of guilt over that whole situation.

"Mal wanted revenge on Evie for inviting everyone but her to her birthday party when they were kids, so she planned on letting her grab it. She was going to, too. Her fingertips were less then an inch away when Mal shouted and grabbed it herself."

"I still don't know why I did that," Mal admitted. "I didn't hate her anymore, but I was still evil. My feet kind of moved on their own. And my hand reached out because I didn't... I didn't want her to take the curse for me."

"So what happened?" a new voice asked, making a few of them jump. Behind Carlos stood Ally and Freddie, late just as Carlos has said they'd be. They both sat their trays down before sitting down themselves. Ally looked between all of them. "What? I'm curious as to why Mal's awake!"

Freddie grinned. "You know they were about to get there, right, babe?" Ally crossed her arms and turned her head away. "Aw, c'mon, don't be like that. I'll share all the donuts I grabbed with you." She waved one in front of Ally's face.

"Fine. But only because you took all of them and I couldn't get one myself unless I went off-campus."

"Great!" Freddie slid the plat between them before prompting, "So, the rest of that story?"

Swallowing the food he had in his mouth, Carlos continued, "Mal fell to the floor at its touch, and we were all pretty shocked and concerned, no matter what they'll tell you." He smirked at Jay, who shoved his shoulder in return. "Like two minutes later, she woke up. Evie accused her of planning to let her take the curse. Jay admitted to how he was planning on stealing the scepter."

"I still can't believe your mom's stupid bird stole it before I could," Jay muttered.

"And I can't believe you're still hung up on that," Mal said with a roll of her eyes.

"Well I can't be-"

"Guys. The story." Evie pushed her tray towards Carlos, so Dude could lick the crumbs from her plate.

"So we all ended up going back empty handed, but you could feel a shift in our group. After everything we went through for the scepter, and then to see that the kid of the biggest bad do an act of good? Yeah, things were different. A good different. We were actually friends after that." He took a big bite before finishing. "Mal went from hating Evie's guts to being her best friend. We didn't really have a phrase for it, though. We went with 'gang activity.'"

"Aw, Mal, that was so sweet of you!" Freddie exclaimed, voice dripping with sarcasm. Ally gently slapped her arm, which only made her smile wider.

Not bothering to respond, Mal focused on eating her food until Evie spoke up.

"She saved my life that day. I've been smitten ever since."

"Wow, that's a pretty crazy story," Jane said. "I'm glad you all made it out okay."

"Seriously, I'm so glad you all got to come here and be, well, not sleeping for a thousand years," Lonnie said.

"And we're glad to be here," Mal told them, speaking for her and her friends. "It was a tough adjustment for... well, not them, but for me. I'm glad I'm here now, though."

Under the table, Mal felt a hand close around hers, soft and warm. Her gaze slowly made its way to Evie, who still wore a smile. There was a squeeze, and Mal took it to mean 'I'm glad you're here too.'

"Okay, I just have one more question," Ally said. "Why were we talking about that story? What's the reason?"

"That's two questions," Freddie teased, earning a jab to her ribs. "I'm curious too, though."

"Oh, we were telling Mal about all the instances where Evie was being pretty obvious with her feelings."

"Wait, you mean she didn't know? Girl, you are somethin' else," Freddie said, shaking her head.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. We can all talk about how oblivious I am later, but classes are about to start again and I'd rather not get another late mark."

"Oh, me either. Fairy Godmother is getting real tired of seeing this face in her office."

"Freddie, darling, how often are you late?" Ally asked, hastily finishing her meal.

"Often enough to know FG is letting me keep a stash of snacks in her office for all the times I'm there."

"You're such a mess," Mal commented, gathering the empty trays to put away. She saw a few of her friends about to speak, so before they could, she said, "Yes, I am too, you guys do not need to say it."

The group broke into laughter once more, and Mal couldn't help but join in while they all cleaned up their table. When it was all finished, they made promises to meet again the next day, and went their separate ways.

Mal walked Evie to her next class, as she always did, and finally saw what everyone else did. Their hands were clasped together, and their shoulders touched with each step, just like they did everyday.

Wow, Mal thought, I can't believe I didn't see it before. As she thought about their relationship further, they made it to Evie's classroom and stopped outside the door to face each other.

"Wanna talk before we hangout with the boys later?" Evie asked, gently swinging their arms.

"I do. See you after classes?"

"Yep. See you then!" she promised, reluctantly pulling her hands away. Walking into the classroom, she cast one last look over her shoulder, and then disappeared from view.

The warning bell rang through the halls, ushering students to their classrooms, including Mal. It went without saying that she couldn't focus through the rest of her classes, and instead decided to doodle through her notebooks once again.