#bc someone can have a femme love interest and not be straight

[withacapitalp]

It's official lads Eddie Munson has a type

It's not men. It's not women. It's not even both.

His type is Rich Kid, and he's gonna die mad about that.

[leavemebetosleep]

Alright here's a short version of how I'd fix Bride of Discord. As a sort of mental editing exercise.

While not really a good fic for a lot of reasons, Bride of Discord actually has a lot of potential as a story. There's a lot of great imagery, and it has a lot of fic tropes I like and are fun to read. I actually would probably change less than some people would. (If your "rewrite" doesn't keep any of the original anything, it's not actually a rewrite babes)

It's just that a lot of stuff in it is maybe played from the wrong angle.

Also there's no saving the Applejack/Spike thing. That's just gross. I think you could keep a similar subplot, just change it so AJ's crushing on someone else. I like AppleDash, but RariJack would probably work the best here. Maybe in this version she's afraid to confess bc she thinks Rarity is straight since she's so femme.

As for the main couple, I think you could actually make the demanding a wife thing work, just have it play out differently.

Like, Discord is old. He spent a lot of time as a statue, and might not be up to date on modern society. Maybe instead of it being a VERY creepy request that screams "sex slavery" make his request explicitly a somewhat less creepy political marriage.

That was common back in his day, and he IS trying to make a peace treaty with Twilight. Being married to one of her people is a show of good faith, that she won't go back on her word, and he won't go back on his, as well as metaphorically uniting their kingdoms.

He doesn't care who it is, because he's not intending to fall in love with them. At best they're gonna be an extended house guest.

They can even point out that's dated and weird, but he can also counter he doesn't know how else to get a proper show of trust. He doesn't trust them with his own safety, but he does trust they won't go after one of their own.

That could also play into why he's so insistent they get married already. Fluttershy trying to avoid the marriage once she's in his kingdom makes it feel like he's being set up, and like the treaty is tenuous. Or maybe he's even suspicious that she's avoiding because the ponies don't plan to stick to their deal.

That could even factor int the climax, but I'll get there.*

Discord can be lonely, and he can still also be a little desperate for companionship, but I don't think that should be his reason for the marriage. Otherwise he could've just asked for a companion, not a wife. Plus, I feel like per-reformation Discord would be in denial about being lonely. I think he'd only start to realize how much he's been missing out on until AFTER he's gotten to know Flutters.

*So in the climax, Fluttershy declares she doesn't love him bc her friends are badgering her, and he gets creepy possessive and tries to hypnotize her and there's a fight and what-not.

Yeah, instead of that what if it's his paranoia that she's avoiding getting married because they plan to betray him coming to a head?

He hears Fluttershy say something to her friends that out of context sounds like they're going to blast him back into stone after all. So he's think she's a traitor who played him for a fool.

I'd nix the hypnotism, just have him and the six fight it out, and then he kicks everyone out before Fluttershy can explain because he's heartbroken and doesn't want anyone to see.

Lot of minor fixes I'd throw in too, cutting out plot threads that go nowhere. Less heteronormativity. Fixing a LOT of OOC-ness. A LOT.

Oh and I'd change Discord's backstory too. The Megamind rip off thing is meh, and I think Discord's a character you could do a lot more interesting things with that that.

As for Fluttershy, a huge problem I have with this fic is she lacks real agency. I want her to choose to go with Discord, not out of the weird sense of feeling she has to sacrifice herself. (It comes off, for lack of a better word, suicidal.)

Maybe instead, she chooses to go because despite her shyness, she's bold when it matters. She will stand up to him. She's not going to be afraid of him anymore. She's gonna tame him like every other wild animal she's had to deal with, and save her home in the process. She's going to come back. He can't keep her there if she really decided to leave.

Have her be the Fluttershy who tried and failed to use her stare on him.

Also, in the original I never at any point felt like she fell in love with him. Just that she gave up resisting his advances. She's always wary and hesitant to do anything with him. That's fine for the beginning of their relationship, but for this to be a good love story that has to change at some point.

Where's the moment she realizes she finds him a little attractive actually? He's weird looking, but he's so confident and funny and fun and that's really appealing. Where's the part where she's having fun and forgets she's a prisoner? Where's the real bonding? Setting boundaries?

Maybe she convinced Discord to let her friends visit, not because she's marrying him already, but because she convinces him to try to make other friends. And he does it, because he loves her already at this point. And she thinks if he and her friends could get along, they could work thing out. Maybe she was hoping things would go well so she could tell him she wanted to marry him after all.

Maybe she really did want her friends at her wedding, but also to be able to have her parents, her brother.

This last bit has nothing to do with the author's writing. This fic was originally written before the show ended, and we got a lot of lore afterwards she couldn't have known about. That's not her fault she couldn't see the future. But just for my sanity, I'd add in more cannon lore.

And uh. I guess that's all got with what I remember of it. Yeah.

[thisismisogynoir]

Non-Blacks Don’t Reblog This.

Where are all the Black lesbians that straight Black women are claiming are overrepresented in media because honey I ain’t seeing them.

I see so many straight Black women(namely on social media) saying that most Black female representation in mainstream media is lesbian. They complain that those characters only exist to tick off as many diversity boxes as possible(bc yk being Black and gay isn’t possibly something that can coexist), and that they’re only gay to send the message that Black women are less desirable to men(bc you know we all want to be desirable to men and that’s what our value hinges on), and so on and so forth, just plain utter nonsense.

And don’t get me wrong, some of their complaints were valid, such as that these characters’ sexualities sometimes aren’t given much focus in media, or that they are often more masculine(which isn’t a bad thing once again but it would be nice to see more Black femmes in media), or that they are often given a white woman love interest, or at worst that they tend to be made cops, but beyond that I reeeeeeally have to question why I so often see straight Black women complaining about “too many” Black girls being lesbians in fiction because as a Black lesbian I can assure you that this is nowhere near the reality. I also saw someone complain that every strong female character is made a lesbian. And well…you all already know my thoughts about that.

To me it just seems like regular degular lesbophobia. A lot of straight women have this aversion to lesbians and see us as the worst thing a woman or female-aligned person can possibly be: completely independent of and not in need of men. And sadly this isn’t just exclusive to white women, but Black women and women of color can do this too because lesbophobia is universal. I’m so sick of straight women throwing lesbians under the bus even in shared marginalized spaces and seeing us as this stereotype or negative example to avoid. There needs to be more diverse representation of Black love in media, that cannot be denied, but what I cannot sit here and take is straight Black women acting like Black lesbians are the problem. Because again, show me the plethora of Black lesbians that are supposedly oversaturating media and being more represented than straight Black women. I wanna live on the planet you live on. Both straight Black women and white lesbians get waaaay more representation than Black lesbians combined and yet it’s Black lesbians that are the problem and the overdone stereotype that we need to do away with. Lmao.

[feralattentionwhore]

Get to know the blog:

So apparently my horny posts are something worth following for so I guess I'll do a bio and about me thing that definitely won't turn into a random ADHD ramble about shit

About me

I'm Feral, 19 and I never learnt how to read ✌️

^^ I'm leaving this up because I think it's hilarious but I'm 20 now

Living in the UK but not white

demisexual as fuck, preference for women but honestly I'm more interested in how we vibe than any gender. I tend to identify most with lesbian/sapphic labels because I feel most comfortable in this community.

fuck knows my gender either, I mostly present femme atm but I just identify as *all* I'd say I'm more nb/w or nb/nb & t4t but just in love with queer people in general. I am a girl but I'm also a boy, I'm not cis. You aren't straight if you're attracted to me

Owned, completely and utterly in love, technically poly. I'd rather start off as friends and see how it goes (benefits available if we vibe)

-Dni and more under than the cut-

DNI:

I'm saying this now, I love y'all but minors please get off my page *respectfully*. This includes blank blogs without your age/ age range

Cis men-Age regressors-People who fetishise trans people, s*ssies and cross dressers-Gender/sexuality correction-terfs/homophobes etc-

Oh and PSA this fucking includes people who gatekeep LGBT labels, including but not limited to hating on butch lesbians who transition, nb&he/him lesbians. Just honestly if you aren't accepting of the ✨ENTIRE✨ LGBT+ community and how people choose to identify please leave. No buts no ifs no maybes

How to give attention:

Asks are completely okay, if you want to talk through anon regularly pick an emote and I'll be sure to tag it so they're easy to find. Flirt with me or ask questions, just keep it within my limits please.

Requests are also totally okay along with reblogs of any of my posts. They're always appreciated!

Unless we've interacted before please don't randomly DM me. Mutuals are obviously always welcome to chat, for non moots I prefer asks as I get a lot of anxiety

I tend to check out profiles that reblog/follow so if you want to be moots then that's the way to go

I can't believe I have to say this, but if you're only messaging me to sext or roleplay or whatever you call it you can leave. It makes me uncomfortable, and will most likely make me feel weird about talking to you again in the future. I'm happy to flirt but unless we've talked about it nothing more.

Safe words and talks about boundaries and limits are non negotiable in kink. If you're not respectful of that you're not a dom, if you don't have complete understanding of how this works and expect to engage in anything sexual with someone without doing proper preparation you're practicing unsafe and frankly dangerous kink. Kink is something serious and you need to know what you're doing

I'm demisexual, with a partner and require actual communication before I engage in anything other than flirting. If you're literally only talking to me bc I'm hot or for sex n stuff you're going to be disappointed

I also have a shit tonne of anxiety, so I will disappear if something makes me feel unsafe. If I don't reply, don't make it worse by getting upset. I'm sorry but I really just don't have the energy to deal with things, especially when we don't really vibe.

About ✨whore✨me:

I'm a sub mostly, total bottom and complete mess irl. thought I was ace until this year and basically innocent af (I mean significantly less as of v recently but still fairly shy). Also kinda a hermit so I'm very touch starved.

Short long summary of my kinks.. To be continued..

- Praise and nicknames, specifically cute ones that start with "my"

- Exhibitionism Mostly being uh, fucked in front of people and stuff

- hands and fingersJust god, everything to do with them. In my mouth? Yes, Pulling my hair? Yesss, choking me?? Yesssssssss, hurting tf out of me?? Please

- being manhandled, strength, just be stronger than me and throw me around pls&ty

- being a simp for me and letting me get away with pretty much anything?? Yes

- being controlled and posessiveness Like a lot, like probably more than a healthy amount

- being teased, constantly

- marks.. Just fucking marks feeling owned and having proof of it with collars and stuff

- and also pain, pain and more pain all the hard kinks

- voices, dirty talk, the way they beg, and moan, and call me a good girl, the way their voice drops when they tease me. Everything about voices

- corruption.. 👀 😤

- being free use, letting friends fuuck me, being a whore for everyone. Them sharing my nudes with their friends, them letting their friends fuck me? Yes please

- affectionate domination / soft doms but rough sex

- most of this is just the long way of saying I have a massive kink for my pretty ass girlfriend though.. Just everything about them.. Mostly their hands, and their voice and uh.. Yeah just them

Limits:

-degradation, any way shape or form,I'll most definitely cry. Acting like you don't like me, hurt me because you love me not because you think I'm worthless

- pet play, Ddlg and that kind of vibe aren't for me

- I don't quite know how to explain it but the strict af, black suit and tie, academy / high protocol/training style/straight people bdsm. It's just way too nonpersonal for me and not fun. I prefer messing around and stuff plus my gf looks way better in a skirt

- discipline, punishments and other things that make me think you hate me (see: I'm a big ass baby and sensitive af)

- refering to my uhh *anatomy* just uh it gives me dysphoria like a lot so please don't

- body fluid shit, incest, feet, tickling, hypnosis

- other things that I'm not perticularly comfortable talking about here, you don't need to know unless we're talking

Tags I use:

Yes I'm insanely bad at tagging things, yes I'm trying, no it's not working. If I forget to, just get mad at me in asks or something. I'm sorry ADHD just kind of does that

#feral asks - all asks that I've answered

#feral music - music recommendations because I have a god complex about music

#feral in love - direct posts about my gf/wife/partner/Dom/love of my life

#feral tmi - random personal shit about myself and figuring out my body

#feral reblogs - stuff I reblog, I have a separate account where I keep most of my reblogs but sometimes I can't help it

#needy feral - me begging for attention on Tumblr

#feral exposed - photos of me

#tw feral - depressing shit, mute the tag if you don't want to see that shit

#dark feral - hard kink shit, mute if you'd rather not see it

#feral complaints - shit that bothers me

#feral blogs - thoughts, updates and questions for you all about the blog

[perfectlyripeclementine]

8, 17, 25, and 50 for butch/femme ask meme!

I really like your blog & writing, thank you for posting queer sex & being here! :)

Aw thank you how sweet!! I appreciate you, thanks for being around 🥰

What is a butch/femme thing you can’t get into? 

Honestly just the word femme. I’m def not butch/masc but I am nb. I do identify with the things people describe as femme, like i def fall into the femme archetypes created by works like Stone Butch Blues. I love to care for people with “feminine” arts like cooking, healing. But femme in my native language is literally just the word woman, nothing queer about it. I know words change as they move languages and I have no issues with folks who do like it, but for me when i use it it’s out of a lack of something that feels “true.” I feel pretty 🤷Truly I’m just vibing, i don’t hate looking like a woman, i wear jewelry and long hair, but I also feel hot as fuck in boxers and love to be called handsome.

Also, i hate wearing long nails and i never paint them.

What is GAY™ thing you wanna do this year?

Last summer i set the intention to eat more pussy and more perfectly ripe fruit. It worked out p well for me. Might do the same this summer.

What is your idea of really good representation in media? 

This is a good question and I have mixed feelings. I think i just want more queer media in general, particularly by queer people.

I want more queer media that’s not like, ABOUT being queer, and definitely isn’t about like the horrible plight of being queer. I don’t want to erase the difficulties of queerness but like when I came out to my mom she kind of was like, I’d have never wished that for you because it’s hard to live as a queer person. And i understand where she gets that from, from the queer media that exists in the mainstream. But i don’t feel like being queer is some kind of curse. It’s a blessing and I couldn’t truly love myself if I didn’t see a way out of trying to be loved by men.

On the other hand I also just want more queer media that’s not for straight people. I don’t really need most straight people to like see the deep nuances of my gender. I want to be able to write stuff that’s queer that’s completely illegible to straight people and I want that to be okay. I want things that represent the community building aspect of queerness - how much of our practices revolve around showing up for each other, how much effort our spaces put into being inclusive. I want the things we make not to be held to the standard of perfection or breadth of audience.

What do you look for in a romantic partner? 

Ohhhh interesting. I’ve been thinking about this. I try to avoid making like a laundry list bc I think being too specific in what i’m looking for can easily turn into projecting a hypothetical Ideal Partner onto someone who checks some of my boxes - and that’s not fair to either of us.

I think I want someone with whom i can continue exploring my gender. I want someone who will dance with me and let me cook for them. I want someone who is curious and engaged with my work, and who is also working on things I can help them think through. I’ve never had a partner with whom I share a second language, and have always been curious what kind of communication that would open up.

Also i should mention here that I’m practicing polyamory at the moment, so I’m interested in someone who’s curious about alternative family structures and invested in community building. Some of these things (like freedom to explore my gender) are more important than others, I don’t expect anyone to like check all these boxes. And i’m sure there’s stuff I’d really love that I’m not even thinking of.

[butchhamlet]

PLEASE elaborate on how u got to butch sir toby. (also i will be sending this to my (also nb butch) castmate so we can revel in his butch/butch hostility w malvolio)

okay first of all allow me direct you to my twelfth night homotrans staging from january bc it has my scene by scene notes on toby butch

butch/femme toby/maria was proposed in someone’s tags on one of my posts and as soon as i read it i was like. oh i am never going to think about anything else. there is no other staging. it makes toby such a more interesting and sympathetic character imo because everything he does, all of the drinking and carousing, and even the belligerent careless way he acts, becomes a deliberate rebellion against conventional womanhood (plus it gives his relationship with maria more depth imo because rather than just being annoyed by him, she’s legitimately worried he could be in danger because of the way he presents himself). am i biased? as fuck. but it makes him so much more compelling than “idk he’s some random middle-aged man who just gets drunk and causes problems.” number one character i want to butch in-text (butch used as a verb here) (he beats hamlet bc my hamlet is always trans but not necessarily always a lesbian)

in my homotrans staging, i initially thought “okay, so malvolio is a cishet guy and that makes toby, maria, and feste Getting His Ass less awful because it’s like… how the turn tables… perhaps he’s a bit homophobic and they’re mean to him about it by right.” however i fucking love malvolio and You specifically put lesbian malvolio into my head (well. you and ntlive twelfth night with lesbian malvolia holy FUCK that staging is SO fucking good and i think about it all the time) and honest to god that is peak. absolute ideal god tier staging: malvolio, maria, toby, and feste are all lesbians and toby and feste are both played as foils to malvolio (because they ARE they are foils they ARE…) and that makes what they do to malvolio so much more poignant, i think, because the way i read it, feste and toby didn’t really intend for it to go that far. they just got caught up in things. & then we have room for an ending realization that they’ve mistreated someone who is FAR more like them than not, and all three of them have this shared wlw experience and yet they’ve Done This to malvolio. and what do you do with yourself then? what do any of them do with themselves then?

in lighter thoughts. malvolio toby butch/butch hostility is so fucking funny. they are the two opposite ends of the butch fashion spectrum. malvolio irons all of his clothing and probably wears bow ties and cufflinks and toby has been wearing the same rumpled hawaiian shirt for four days straight & also shutter shades

[bae-science]

it’s t-t-t-t-time for another newt bae-science fic rec extravabonanza! same rules, same boys, same bullshit! let’s get into it:

a beginning; a second chance by @dykesword

other newt and i have a long and intricate ritualistic battle to become the alpha newt, but i gotta give credit where it’s due. if you like to annotate your books for fun, this fic will give you a looooong comment you’ll want to write, and for good reason! there’s a lot of really well done metaphor and character detail in here, while still keeping a very soft, melancholy but with a hopeful edge tone. and also, like, the care and detail in which newt’s mental state in the aftermath of the precursors’ abuse is depicted is so so good, and delightful to read

husbandly duties by @kingeiszler

i am soooo biased with this one bc technically it was made for me but GODDAMN it’s good. this shit has everything: gottlieb trio sibling dynamics, vanessa in giant femme earrings, hermann yearning, newt and karla infodumping together, newt’s terrible and accurate gaydar, gay crime, the newmann dynamic and why it works boiled down to its bare essentials, pride and prejudice glasses touch, and neon green acrylics. required reading for the vanessaverse

Say That Again by @robertfrobisherslover

WOOF. if you like mutual pining and lack of communication from men with rocks for their emotional processing centers, and guncle (gay uncle) newt and hermann and KILLER artsy sex scenes, and themes of words unsaid in a story about LANGUAGE..... oogoogogoogouhufug. the writing style is clear and well paced, i LOVE little mako’s scene she’s such a cutie, and there’s like. a line. that’s a play on the whole “it’s always been you” trope. that lives in my mind rent free forever.

speak right to my heart without saying a word by @thekaidonovskys

i’m just gonna paste the comment i left on it here, because that sums up what is so absolutely incredible about this fic the best:

so sometimes you stumble on a piece of fiction that you add to your little collection of stuff you would show a person if you wanted them to understand a part of you that you can't quite explain eloquently, or it would take too long, etc etc, and i've never really found something like that for my autism until now, which, like, poggers. and i'll be as straight up as i can while still being the biggest lesbian in the great state of ohio (not a hard feat but alan invented computers so i love continuing on the autistic tradition of being a living miracle), the chameleon effect hit me like a mack truck. catholic school in the deep south is the most potent and effective form of ABA therapy imaginable :/. so sometimes i wonder what i would be like if i didn't have such a strong ability to pass, and here's where we finally get to the part of this comment where i just vomit compliments at you: you nailed it. you got it. i don't know if you're on the spectrum, but either way, well fucking done. trauma therapy research talks a lot about healing fantasies, which are fantasies, usually in the form of daydreams, that abused/neglected/traumatized/etc people create that directly address a struggle they have and take the form of a scenario in which that struggle is helped in some way. it could be an abusive parent repenting and showering them with the love they never had, or someone finding them during a panic attack and somehow knowing how best to comfort them without having to ask, or being intimate with someone and having a scar or physical deformity they've been shamed for be given attention and care. and i think you have created the ultimate perfect healing fantasy for autistic people, or at least those with """"high functioning"""" autism. it has a character who is visibly and undeniably on the spectrum having the pain and trauma going through life like that causes being acknowledged and validated, they are purposefully paid attention to because person b genuinely likes them and wants to understand and respect who they are and how they function in the world, and thus get The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known as well as the eventual rewards of being loved, person b makes a genuine effort to help teach them social skills in a way they can understand and learn through and is there for them when these skills are being practiced, their space and boundaries are respected but they aren't infantilized or thought of as an emotionless robot, and they receive love and comfort on their own terms not despite of but because of who they are, even specifically being asked not to change the way they are because that way is lovable. they are openly desired. writing is my fucking JOB and it's still difficult to put into words how much you got 100000% right about the dream with this fic. i have been in the EXACT and i mean EXACT same situation as hermann when he asked newt if it was his personality itself that made people not like him, because i deadass made a spreadsheet of all my personality attributes i thought could be preventing me from making friends in college, and then asked my fellow nd friend to see if there was anything i was missing. so i guess what i'm trying to say is that this amazing, and i'm bookmarking it and putting it on my next fic rec post, and maybe one day way way in the future if i ever get a partner i want to explain the whole autism thing to, i'm gonna have them read this.

The Facts With Newton Geiszler, PhD by what_alchemy (NSFW)

storytime: i read this fic a few years ago, completely forgot the title and author, and ended up thinking about the part where hermann admits to having fucked a trailer hitch when he was a teenager, at least once a week. last november, i say to my friend samara on twitter, head of the BSHCU (buttslut hermann cinematic universe), hey this seems like something you’d have read, do you remember a fic where... and samara says FUCK i do know what you’re talking about lemme find it. so if the fact that i have been looking for this fic for like, two years, and that it contains a moment so iconic all i had to say is, “hermann says he fucked a trailer hitch” and she IMMEDIATELY knew what i was talking about, does not convince you to read this... go back to catholic school i guess.

Feeling Blue by TempusPetrichor

fics where newt goes back to work as a biologist, especially a xenobiologist, post pru are really interesting, and usually have something neat to say about recovery, how it isn’t linear, how it often involves us returning to things we love for comfort, etc. this one sure does! some good emotional and physical h/c, LOVE the use of the ghost drift, and it’s always fun to see post pru fics use dialogue very obviously taken from dbt, trauma-specific therapeutical texts, and anything that shows the author has experience with, or did their research on, ptsd therapies.

You’re Everyone That Ever Cared by KlavierWrites

you know a fic is good when it’s an only 9k slowburn and still manages to reach infinite regress levels of are you fucking KIDDING GO TO THERAPY. newt “acts of service” geiszler may have a little misplaced misogyny due to his broken woman-centric gaydar. as a treat. the fucking. post-drift scene where hermann subtextually screams “LOOK IN OUR BRAINS YOU FUCK I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU I JUST HAVE AUTISM AND CAREER IN STEM DISORDER” is soooooo. god just hermann in general in that scene is great. if you like classic mid 2010s era newmann, ghost drift romance, and good ole mutual pining, this is a treat.

Baby, You're Hotter than my Bunsen Burner by SkySongMA

moronosexual hermann representation is something that can actually be so personal

Times of Stress by RadioMoth

the boys are processinggggggg. man what a good, quick and powerful punch to the gut. if you like post-pr1 catharsis and physical h/c, AND are the one friend that likes to comment at the end of the movie that hey newt got beat the fuck UP, check this one out.

black tea by @faggotcas

okay first of all, god fucking tier url, lee. second of all, food as a love language is my SHIT. i love the very slow relationship development here, where you see them making a genuine effort to get along and that in turn leading to feelings reigniting. it’s such a sweet little moment of a fic, with a nice atmosphere and tone to fit it

now here’s the part where i usually drop my latest fic, but i haven’t written one this month because i’ve been busy launching an audio drama! you can find it here, it’ll be right up your alley if you like cryptids and gay scientists and enemies to lovers and good ole americana, but since this is a newmann post, i’m gonna recommend the pacific rim audio drama duology i did a while back! part one is called conversations from the brink, and it’s a little slice of the pr3 we better fucking get from streaming that godawful looking anime. love and lesbians to everyone ❤️

[abri-chan]

Gangsta as a manga tops the chart for people coming out or realizing their sexuality at the most importune times. (some examples)

(tw: rape mention)

Beretta realizing she may also be into women, first by wanting to break down Connie, bc she is Marco's wife, and she smells the way it reminds Beretta of an old friend. But then there's the part when she seeks some affection or at least attraction from Connie (Beretta is canonically a femme fatale), as a way to take HER--something, anything--from Marco, and yet Connie only cares about Marco. The fate of Marco/Connie sealed it for her that men cannot be trusted, because she has had this tragical attraction to them: possibly she may not even be into men, it's just that she grew up with Marco and Striker, and she had no one to depend on except from that in the experimental facility. She cannot distinguish between affection and lust at this point, and approaches others using her looks bc it has always worked. So she loved Striker, but he was obsessed with Marco. Then she also became obsessed with Marco, but Marco betrayed them both for Connie, and was willing to die than return to her and Striker. In the end, she was left following shadows, when it came to men. I wouldn't be surprised if she says "fuck it" by now, because she has already decided men are pathetic after the Marco and Striker fight, and she may be a wild card under Corsica bc she has nothing to lose: anyone she cared for has betrayed her, and they are men. And so is Corsica, and it's a man's war, so fuck it. She may fight for herself only no; no loyalties.

Bernardo realizing he may be into men, like a chaotic bisexual that he is. He went from "fuck Worick, all the women seem to throw themselves at him, what does he have that the rest of us don't?", to nagging Big Mama about his past (someone let this woman rest, she is surrounded by men that are dumber than her but more in power; deserves better), to "maybe fuck Worick, but you know literally fuck him"; "I don't know if I should be attracted to you or hate you for getting all the women". And the fact that he tries to flirt, even tho Worick is a prisoner to his family, bc he needs to prove his loyalty, and Bernardo is one of the higher ups in the family. And that he flirts so badly, with the worse pickup lines to a a guy who's an escort and probably has heard it all. Bernardo please, you are flirting in a library, you are desperate. I'm sure Worick is calculative in why he is not even trying to warm up to Bernardo, when he is clearly putting a facade for the rest of the family; but I love how Bernardo is trying so hard to get Worick to notice him and keeps returning like a puppy, even tho Worick is giving him the cold shoulder. (If only he wasn't so awe/bara-struck to remember he holds power over Worick and can technically force Worick to do all that Bernardo wants.)

Disclaimer: I actually like both Beretta and Bernardo, like I crush for them. Ivan on the other hand, I hate this guy. But his coming out is kinda epic in terms of story-telling, in spite of how low-life and disgusting he is as a person. (Long story short for those that have not caught up with his character: he's the type of person to demand the world, but not willing to actually put up the work to get there. So he's lazy, disgusting, unfaithful, and yet thinks he's hot shit and deserves good things. There's nothing redeeming or interesting about this guy. I digress.) So Ivan seemed at first your average straight guy in the world of Gangsta; a guy who abuses both drugs and women sex workers (he's scum what more can I say?) He's later shown to hang out with Erica, or rather be able to control her after the mind-fuck experiments they had performed on her. (It's rather sad that she uses forehead kissing as a proxy for affection, and she will obey to her object of affect that she recognizes by the kiss, when it fact it probably comes from her childhood and her brother kissing her in the forehead.) Fast-forward to the recent culmination of the "find Erica subplot" with Delico and Yang confronting Erica (who is an empty doll by now) and Ivan, who controls her. And Ivan dropping words that in one go mindfucked two characters and the manga readers: Yes, Erica is his bodyguard/toy. Yes, he fucks her; as in rapes her nightly and too bad that she just stays there limp and doesn't make a sound, if only she did. But it's cool he supposes, bc he consoles himself with the fact that he daily rapes someone with the face of his colleague, Delico, and he gets to meet Delico daily too; so it's fun, rape one sibling, imagine it is both. (How do you like that, Delico and Yang? Not so glad you reunited with Erica now, are you?) The cool part, and I like how cruel Kohske can be, is that in retrospect there was foreshadowing of him having a thing for Delico, before we even knew he already had Erica: from the start Ivan would pick on Delico that he was too serious in his work, maybe he should have some fun, must be boring to be a workaholic like him. At first you think may be bc Ivan's lazy ass is incompatible in philosophical with a hard-worker like Delico, only to realize Ivan is on some sadistic trip on how he's daily hurting someone Delico loves, and yet the man is ignorant of what is going on. And you're like, well Ivan is a piece of shit but damn good at being a piece of shit, bc in his head he's like "loosen up Delico, have some fun, like I do with your sister when I rape her; yeah I'd wish I raped you too". That's good foreshadowing and conclusion, and great way to make a piece of shit character, but damn does it hurt. And yeah, obviously that's how this guy came out as bi/pan, minfucking everyone involved.

[petekaos]

hi so ive been studying thai cultures of sexuality and gender for my (kind of not really) college thesis and obviously my research had been little limited because of the lack of english papers on the subject (so !! if you're thai and LGBT+ PLS correct me) but one thing that i've been wrestling with in criticisms of this show is how people have rallied against wife/husband discourse because it feels like a very Eurocentric look at how people express their sexualities. (And +

this comes from someone who hates top/bottom + wife/husband gendering myself!) Thai conceptions of gender/sexuality don’t really fit into the categories of LGBT(+) as easily as believed, especially since the terms people used can often differ based on the sexuality and gender of WHO they’re attracted to and also on the presentation of gender rather than what people feel they are! +

(Also the word phet means both gender AND sexuality, meaning there is not often a distinction between gender/sexuality and boy can you tell I have nothing to do with my time) Which is oh my god confusing but to give an example, when gay was first introduced as an identity marker people began to refer to themselves as “gay kings” v “gay queens” based on which dude was the sexually receptive partner. +

Lesbians are also gendered in a similar format: “tom” tends to refer to butch lesbians (and can sometimes be seen as part of the overarching kathoey third gender) and “dee” refers to femme lesbians. To clarify, I am Indian-American and therefore would solidly punch someone in the face if they tried to classify me and my (nonexistent lol) partner as the “wife” v “husband,” +

especially when the roles you take in bed become an essential part of how you communicate your identity within the gay community. In the states, you can call yourself a lesbian without having to qualify how butch or how much of a top you are, in Thailand the words themselves inherently hold that connotation. Not saying its right, but there is cultural precedent that I think is interesting to explore in asking WHY this trope is so common. +

I know there have been certain shows that have had characters say that they are bi/gay (ie. Mean’s character from UWMA, Ohm’s character from HCTM) but these are not words that originated from Thailand itself, they are loan words from English. That’s not to say they’re invalid in any aspect, but that DOES say that while people who do fall into gay/bi categories may have existed, there was little/no direct translation for these words in thai until the 1960s. +

When gender and sexuality are not considered distinct categories but are rather all lumped under the term “phet,” it is therefore Hard in Thailand to lump people together as ie. Bi without having an additional sex and gender qualifier in the term. “Seua bai” (which means bi tiger and wtf why is that SO cool) refers to /masculine/ bi men, but seau bai are also not seen as completely male because, +

again, seau bai as a phet implies that they are not 100% phu chai - male - which really only refers to heterosexual men. SO while I would love to see tine/sarawat say that they are bi/gay, I’d also equally love for them to express that they are bi/gay with terms inherent to thai, bc I think that offers a really interesting perspective to int fans (and straight thai fans who are unaware) on how gender/sexuality can be different in other cultures. +

They could also offer criticism on these terms if they feel too narrow, which would be really valuable coming from thai writers/producers themselves. Anyway I thought this would be good food for thought, and if LGBT+ thai people have different perceptions PLEASE talk about it if you feel comfortable bc your experiences and knowledge are very valuable and appreciated! Hope this was interesting, sorry for all the spam! i love ur blog rahul -bear

ah thank you so much for this! i have been wondering about this as well recently as more east asians have been speaking up about sexuality and gender in their cultures and how that doesn’t coincide with how westerners express their sexuality and gender. i mean, there are terms that overlap (in indian culture, we have some of those as well, but then we also have hijra and thirunangai and thirunambi in tamil culture) but there are some words exclusive to thai culture specifically. this was great food for thought and i’ll be more careful in the future when it comes to expressing my thoughts on terms for sexuality in bl shows. 

i think it would be really interesting to see these terms used and criticised, if need be, by actual thai lgbt writers and producers. it would be nice to see more of thai culture paid homage to in shows like these and to see the search for labels or terms that fit oneself, i know that has been hard for me personally considering english terms as well. the way we perceive gender and sexuality tends to be very eurocentric and sometimes we need to realise that we need to see things through a different lens and the influence of culture and society on the reason why a lot of these characters don’t use fixed english loan words to describe themselves. this was a super interesting read, thank you! i should have educated myself on it earlier as i got more into this fanbase, but thank you so much for coming along and providing us this information :’)

furthermore i think it would be interesting, as you said, to get input from actual lgbt thai people on this! so if you are lgbt and thai, feel free to send me an ask talking about your experiences and journey with terms and labels, both thai and english, if you feel the want to. y’all always have a platform here with me and i will try my best to provide my insight as well if asked or needed, be respectful, and listen! your knowledge and inputs are very much appreciated, especially when it comes to shows like these and the sometimes unfair criticism they get from people with a western-centric point of view.

thank you once again, my friend!

[bisluthq]

hi! so i remember that you joked on cam’s podcast that harry styles turned you bi, so i’m coming to you for advice haha. so ive identified as a lesbian for about 1 year now. prior to that i identified as queer for like 3 or 4 years, but i never had a Real crush on a man. but lately i’ve been wondering if i might be bi. quarantine has me spending a lot more time fantasizing, and lately men have been sneaking their way in to my fantasies. one thing that might be relevant is that these are always faceless men, and i’m almost always much more interested in the specific woman theyre fucking rather than the man himself. and the other thing is that i can’t name a single real life man i find /that/ attractive whereas pretty much every woman has me swooning.

but here’s the thing. the idea of a dick has been turning me on so much lately. like the idea that you can do the motion of fucking and it’s not just a strap - both of you are feeling it. also lately i’ve /really/ wanted to suck a dick. like i cant imagine a single man whos dick id want to suck, but god that idea turns me on so much. i also think that i would love to have a dick myself so i could feel what it would feel like to rail a woman with a dick (before you ask - i know i’m not a trans man because i used to present very butch and i was frequently mistaken for a man and i did Not Like That At All). anyways, now im thinking maybe i’m bi but can’t imagine an actual man—just like male features—bc of mild trauma i have related to men? or maybe i’m just a lesbian with a dick kink????? oh my god haha i’m wondering if you have thoughts on this situation

oh, another relevant thing here might be that i may have been attracted to real life men before, i’m not sure. like one time i caught my gaze lingering on a jacked tan waiter, and in my youth thinking about men made me curious and a bit turned on (but maybe that was just the idea of sex turning me on and not men themselves?? ugh this is hard haha. maybe i just need to have sex with a man after quarantine is over and see how i feel.)

Yes this blog is all Harry’s fault tbh I’d be a good ole fashioned lesbian without the Lights Up MV (jk jk jk). So dick kinks don’t necessarily make you bi because women could have dicks right and I think your point about both feeling penetrative sex is... pretty valid lol and tbh hot for me too! I mean don’t get me wrong sex between two vaginas is AMAZING and a dick is by no means compulsory or important. But at the same time dicks are pretty hot as both a concept re externalized desire and like can be hot irl for reasons you state.

As I said I’m a cis femme woman and imagining fucking a girl with a dick gets me horny af so that part of what you said makes complete sense. Like it’s just a hot concept. I genuinely couldn’t care less about writing or even reading hetty smut from a female POV but FFS male perspective hetty smut is AMAZING. I mean except when it’s that weird straight man smut where it’s like highkey abusive because I just... don’t get it lol like I said the other day why would you want to fuck someone if it’s not to give pleasure I just do NOT UNDERSTAND THE MENTALITY.

I think what you know for now is you want to fuck someone with a dick. Again, that’s perfectly reasonable. I’d say try it and see what that’s like and... figure out from there. Labels are VERY HARD and you don’t have to use one and stick to it forever and if none fits exactly that’s also fine! “Queer” is enough.

[escapekissed]

Lucky do you have any favorite pieces of media from the psychological horror genre? Feels like its a genre that matches ur interests very well 👉🏽👈🏽

there are a couple that really speak to me!

first is rule of rose, which is a game that is incredibly formative to me. in a time where i was looking for representation as a young gay person and REALLY into looking up wiki pages for horror games, rule of rose showed me the symbolic trauma of puberty and toxic ‘love’ between girl children and the violence of patriarchal figures that i was looking for. it showed such cruelty but also such strength in its main character, and the symbolism? exquisite.... it also just has such a creepy atmosphere and the fact that the game is near impossible to play along with its shitty graphics for the enemies makes it so. peculiar and creepy in a very special way to me.

catherine is another atlus game near and dear to my heart, tho i dont  think i’m ever going to be playing full body for that exact reason. it’s a game basically about eugenics and misogyny, about gods&devils thinking of women as only reproductive objects and the men in their lives that ‘waste their reproductive time’ being tortured and killed for it, taking away a woman’s choice. i always thought it would be so interesting to do trans and lesbian takes on this game, and i have never really? stopped thinking about how this game is so thrilling in its themes of entitlement and stopping people’s freedom to love as they wish. this is also one of the only horror games in which the ‘human element’ actually interests me. so many horror games give u terrible people and i dont give a FUCK ABOUT THEM. but the way this game shows u just snippets of his life as a ‘break’ from the excruciatingly scary (to me, because time limits scare me LOL), stressful as hell puzzles. and u get to figure out the mystery of what is going on in people who would otherwise be boring to you, but in this game are shrouded in just enough mystery that ur actually interested in their boring day-to-day lives. its so satisfying just to drink with ur buds. its like really great gameplay to me tbh. i also just love katherine and catherine and they frusturate me so much and that’s exactly what they’re supposed to do which i LOVE. extremely effective atmosphere setting and worldbuilding, basically.

the lighthouse is my favorite horror movie tbh because it does suspense so well. the movie is literally themed around suspense, the suspense of not getting sexual satisfaction to completion, of being touch starved and lonely and repressed, of being able to hold ur boss but never kiss him, of being fed lobster but it tastes flavorless and bland and u can smell ur boss’s farts the whole time while he prattles on with disturbing sailor’s tales and barks out orders until he’s lulled into his drink. i honestly love this movie. and the acting is brilliant and unhinged

there’s a few indie games i really like that have been either formative to me or i just??? really like their vibe and i can basically tell from them i would like every game in the ‘genre.’

pocket mirror to me is like, this beautiful game about your own inner toxicity and escaping from yourself. i love indie 64-bit games like this, the background art is so beautiful, and while i’ve never played all the way through it because it scares me too much---i love ib and all the games in the ‘ib’ genre LOL.

doki doki literature club i know is a very strange game to like, but i enjoy it for letting the women be actual characters with their own thoughts and feelings. the pychological horror movie ‘i’m thinking of ending things’ is the exact opposite of this game.'i’m thinking of ending things’ is a backwards approach to feminist horror in my opinion. it’s from a male’s perspective of his hallucinations of a girl that once didn’t give him a second glance and his violence towards her in these fantasies. it takes itself painfully seriously. it pretends to deconstruct something that the director helped soldify (the manic pixie dream girl trope) in the public eye. doki doki literature club on the other hand, the passive character who ‘things happen to’ is the man. the active roles all go to the women in the game and what they do to themselves in order to be loved by not just a man, but the player, and in doing so they often become the all-knowing god of their own prison. like tell me that’s not the dopest thing u’ve ever heard of!

twilight zone is a big one for me but 5 episodes in particular have shaped how i view horror forever. ‘to serve man’---where the greatest, scariest thing in the world is not being able to understand the language another person is actually using and for them to manipulate u using ur own, actually wishing u harm as they placate you with your own interpretations. the episode where a rich man’s last will and testament is for his vain, selfish relatives to wear a mask until midnight that reveals symbolically how ugly they are to him. they bicker all night with petty squabbles, and then at midnight he reveals the mask has permeanantly shaped their faces to reveal who they really are and the abuse he suffered under them. the cornfield episode still scares the shit out of me as someone with an entitled younger brother whose entitlement and anger is often enabled by those around us, and i’ve always thought that it was such a good show of like, how patriarchy enables little boy’s violence. the episode ‘all the time in the world’ where an abused man with a shitty life is finally the last man on earth and he can do anything he’d like to do and all he wants to do is read but then he breaks his glasses. and finally! the episode where toys in a box come to life and bemoan their fate as they realize they will be trapped there forever in clothes and identities they do not recognize. these episodes always scare the shit out of me LOL.

besides that i really like. low-budget passion project indie games. the first that comes to mind is ‘the path’ which is about a family of four sisters of various ages all inspired by little red riding hood who stray from the path and are hunted by the woodsman. and then the game that YOU my dear myers! showed me! that haunts me to this day. basically a tape talks to you about the areas of a house and then starts to talk about the house as a living creature. and the living creature is hungry, without you inside it. the living creature is tired of being alone, it’s tired of being abandoned, it’s tired, and it’s eyes are empty with no one in the windows, and it’s mind is blank with no one in the bedroom, and it’s hangry there’s no one in its basement to feast on, to torment as it has been tormented by disuse.

last but not least, i really enjoy the book ‘sharp objects.’ which is not technically a horror novel. but it is about a serial killer, and about women and abuse and it has some of the best writing ever. so i highly recommend it AND the miniseries (watch the miniseries first then read the book bc the miniseries is like. directed better? but the novel is written and characterized better. it’s also very short u can finish it in like a day and a half).

honorable mentions for horror In General (not necessarily psychological horror) are: 1) the birdcage. i honestly consider this movie entirely unsettling. robin williams failing to portray a man that is actually attracted to nathan lane, which could be because they have simply been married so long but also is just awful to me in general bc it makes me feel like even our outwardly gay but still more masc gay men can’t love and be attracted to femme camp gays even when they’re married to them. the fact that both these men that could be so in love, that were so in love at one time, you can at the very least imagine, are told by their only son that they need to go back in the closet to impress some old ass republicans, giving the message that no matter how succesful you are in the gay community, no matter how bright and wonderful a presence you are, no matter how loving you are, no matter how much you love, no matter how interwoven you are in lgbt-ness, the straight people you love most will still try to change you to impress the wold. horrifying.

2) coraline. its children’s horror but that’s still horror baby! i think lately about how much the movie talks about mothers and birth. coraline calls whybie ‘why born’ and i just think about how much she thinks about creating a new life with a new mother, and how going through that small door into a long tube... it’s like crawling into a new womb and being reborn to a new mother that loves you. and that’s horrific from a feminist perspective in and of itself---that your child would feel so unloved and unimportant to you that she would literally... rather die in this life, technically, rather be ‘unborn’ to you and born anew to someone, someone just like you but better, someone just like you but what SHE wants a mother to be, feminine and skirted and smiling. and then there’s the fact that coraline only gives this up when she realizes her other mother basically wants to change her more to suit her liking in ways that would cause her pain, at which point she realizes this whole fantasy is a lie, not real, something meant to entice her and control her and make her ‘perfect’---the same way she wants her mother & father to be ‘perfect’ in a way that causes her to act out and hurt them. it’s psychological horror that’s technically not psychological horror in the best way, something you can really dig your teeth into, something that has so many layers to it. and the animation! gorgeous!

3) finally i have recently watched annihilation. and it kind of changed my life a little bit.... so often we’re used to viewing monsters as either 1) malicious or 2) romantic/sad/sexy. but the monster in this movie is literally a metaphor for cervical cancer. 

to me, the monsters and the corpses and all the beautiful scenery in this movie, in every color u can think of, a muted rainbow of flowers and nature at its best and most bizarre and sprawling. i often say that monsters are beautiful, but tbh, i feel like... somehow i always mean that in a way that is near-fetishitic, somehow self-depcrating way, where i want to consider what other people think is ‘ugly’ is ‘beautiful to me’ because what i am also ugly to other people as a monster to the cishet white patriarchy. there are things i consider beautiful, certainly, purely beautiful. but when i talk about monsters being beautiful, it is in the way the sublime is beautiful. it scares me, it haunts me, i love it, i want to possess it as part of me, a totem to carry in my back pocket to make the strength in my own ugliness stronger.

when i saw the monster in this movie (SPOILERS) i was immediately unnerved at this bad cgi abomination that bloomed from the most beautiul cgi cancer death cosmos imaginable. it scared me and i had to sleep with a light on for 2 days after LOL. but i was also moved by its gentleness. by the fact that the cervical cancer alien, when it tried to hurt you, wasn’t trying to hurt you at all. it was simply copying your movements. in the movie, it says that the creature wants nothing. it was simply copying. it was simply changing. it’s a prism of nature---and it corrupts yes, and it can hurt people and things and turn them into scary but still terribly unique and beautiful things that also kill---but the movie says that it wants nothing. it simply exists. it’s a part of nature, same as us, a part of the same universe and cosmos, despite being alien to us and stange and hurting us sometimes in ways that it doesn’t understand.

i don’t know. if i quite believe the movie when it says that, though. because i think if you copy someone, like a child would, you are trying to understand them. you are trying to understand yourself. you are trying to form yourself in another’s image when you have none, and you are failing at that, and hurting people and creating monsters in the process, but you are trying as best as you can to be whole and beautiful and sane like the lovely creatures you’ve met on this earth, or this body. to be part of something great and beautiful. to be part of another world.

maybe it doesn’t want anything. but do WE want anything as children, when we copy adults? why did the bear and the alligator try to eat our heroes if they were not hungry? did the bear and the alligator not WANT to eat? i think everything wants to live, and everything wants to grow, and if it can learn to live better and grow better it Will learn even if that is not its explicit intention. does the alien have feelings? does nature? do we have to personify things to understand them? no. does personifying things make us understand them less? no, yes, sometimes. we ask animals and nature to copy us, follow us, so that we can understand them better. the relationship in between----from the hurt, from the pain, from the droughts and the food shortages and the hurricanes and the fireworks---forms from our kindness and understanding. that our crops are useful, and the man-made mutation of our crops and the help of the ran and the sun is also useful. that our animals may not love us, but they need us, and we love them for putting their paw on our thighs to be pet, for following us into the bathroom even when we just wanted a moment alone.

regardless of its intentions, the alien, cancer, every creature, every human, they simply want to grow. in copying others---in trying to touch, to change, to understand, and be close---we learn to live in the same body, learn to live in the same world. the togetherness--the new sight the prism brings---it’s beautiful. it is beautiful to copy, however poorly. it is beautiful to try. we all shape others to our own standards---we sometimes forget we too, were made in own own perception of others’ image.

[whenallelsefails-eatpie]

Finally Answering Questions for y’all

Q1: How tall or short do you wish you were?

I used to wish I was taller because I already am tall for an (AGAB)female (5′8 1/2) but then I learned about platforms so. 

4: What was your favorite video game growing up?

Monkey Ball or Sonic Adventure Escape the City...I only had a Gamecube.

6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?

Warning: Uses humor as a defense mechanism but will quickly become extremely invested in you  and give you immense amounts of unending love if they vibe w you

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]

Melancholic

9: Are you ticklish?

extremely, on my back and sides (use this information wisely. I take no responsibility for involuntarily punching anyone who tickles me)

10: Are you allergic to anything?

absolutely nothing, allergies are to weed out the weak. (jkjk no eugenics here sis you slay that epipen)

11: What’s your sexuality?

~ pansexual  ~ (prefer agab [not cis, those are two different things] females)

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?

tea, then coffee with cocoa. I don’t enjoy cocoa or coffee as much separately.

37: What is your eye color?

hazel/green 

38: Introvert or extrovert?

I’m ambiverted but lean toward introversion. 

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?

oh yeah absolutely, I personally just prefer that the tattoos aren’t on your face.  Or with piercings that they don’t take up so much of your face that I can’t see what you really look like.

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?

pink, red, or platinum 56: Something that calms you down?

reading, playing instruments, taking a bath, cooking or baking

57: Have any mental disorders?

yessir. ADD, anxiety. and I used to have really bad depression. Now my depression is simply manageable lol. 

73: What is your MBTI type?

INFP (enneagram 4)

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?

surprisingly yes, will I come close to passing out? Maybe. But I can.

87: Do your socks always match?

never, I hate matching my socks unless the socks are funky and need to match to give them the biggest bang for their buck. 

92: A store you hate?

Dick’s sporting goods. I have been dragged around that place for hours and absolutely nothing there interests me. (edit: I found a beanie that I liked but my previous opinion still stands)

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?

start counting and never stop. If you mean in terms of actual measurements like cups/ounces, I can drink 20. What can I say I’m from New England.

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?

Definitely fly because that might help lessen my fear of heights

95: Do you like to wear camo?

literally shoot me if you ever see me wearing camo. please, I beg you. that will be me at my lowest point 

96: Winter or summer?

Autumn. Next question.

97: How long can you hold your breath for?

3-4 minutes. It’s all that breath control from musical theatre.

99: Someone you look up to:

Jughead Jones. Yes I said that, fight me. He is completely himself and he allows the different facets of his personality to shine through to people that he loves and cares about. He is loyal and caring but also unique and resilient. Plus his fave food is burgers which is an instant win for me.

100: A store you love?

Hot Topic, Barnes and Nobles, Savers or any thriftstore 

102: Where do you live?

New England bb (; gettin that dark academia aesthetic straight from the source

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem?

Amber

105: Do you drink milk?

You mean out of the glass? Like a psychopath? Like a serial killer? Absolutely not

106: Do you like bugs?

I do! Except for spiders and mosquitoes (although I’m warming up to spiders)

109: Can you draw:

Eh yeah ig, well enough. I draw realistically but I’m not great at animated style. 

111: A question you hate being asked?

“Are you a boy or a girl?” (like why? does it personally affect you? are you planning on boning me? if not then buzz off)

113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach?

Yes, but only at night when the beach is quiet. I’m not a huge fan of the beach during the day

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?

Rainy or sunny. Don’t go givin me the clouds with none of the drizzle.

119: Favorite thing about a person: 

Personality first and foremost. Humor and kindness. But physically; their smile and mannerisms. 

120: Fruits or vegetables?

Veggies (or berries i like berries)

121: Something you want to do right now:

Run away... ahah. But in all honesty I would love to go mushroom foraging rn, or possibly go on an adventure. Maybe go put on clothing meant for an entirely different time period and run around Target idk.

123: Sweet or sour foods?

Definitely not sour I hate sour. Spoonfeed me wasabi, that I can handle. But if you make me eat a Warheads I will cry. 

129: What would you want written on your tombstone?

I personally have a lot of problems with the funeral industry, so I would rather not take up space and rot preservation chemicals into the earth. But if I had an interim tombstone with no body underneath, it would read “Live Laugh Love” bc ~irony~

131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself?

that I’m very individualistic and stubborn

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?

Yes absolutely, that’s what they’re there for.

134: Do you like roller coasters?

Do I like feeling like I’m about to full send through the crust of the earth and die? No. No I do not. (I am a simple person, I go to carnivals for the food and to feed off terror.) 139: What nicknames do you have/have had?

Cookie

141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink?

OH YEAH absolutely, I am a repressed gen z homosexual raised in a homophobic religious atmosphere, I am practically born with a therapist assigned to me.

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?

Definitely good -_- unfortunately. Catch me bein the mom friend.

143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help?

I prefer giving, but I am learning how to recieve. 

144: What makes you angry

People who live their lives in willful ignorance despite the endless resources available to them and let that ignorance hurt others.

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries?

All of em. Gimme em all. I don’t like boys as much currently but I would still probably lay my life on the line for some. 

147: Are you androgynous?

Yes. It’s more fluid than it is being in consistent limbo between masc and femme. Usually I’m androgynous but I often swing wildly between both ends of that socially perceived spectrum. 148: Favorite thing about yourself physically?

My hands or smile(product of bracesTM). But I have been told I have nice hands. 

149: Favorite thing about your personality:

I am a very strong blend of wise and class clown. I can do em both, I can do em well, and I can do em whenever. I also care a lot about others but I don’t change myself to be accepted by them. 

150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person.

MLK Jr. --> I want to gain perspective on some of the current global issues. Jesus --> I’ve got a lot of questions for that dude. JRR Tolkien bc he’s incredible or Joan of Arc for the same reason

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose?

Ooh well, as a woman not many eras are desirable. But um probably either the 70s or Ancient Greece

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons?

YES. GIMME UR FINGERS > i meant that to sound much less threatening than it did but my statement still stands. 155: Do you like to play with others’ hair?

Yes it’s literally one of my favorite things to do. I hab empty lap. *pat pat* U may lay your head on it and watch Rilakkuma and Kaoru with me while I play with your hair. pls. 157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious:

Women..... That’s it. That’s the tweet.

158: Biggest lie you have ever told:

That I am not a member of the alphabet mafia. (It’s not currently safe for me to come out) Now tell me *shines light in your face* who are your contacts?

164: Do you have long or short hair?

I have medium hair. It’s around the length of a bisexual bob or a good mullet. 

165: Shortest/Longest your hair has ever been:

Shortest was a pixie cut, almost buzzed, amazing. Longest was to my butt and was literally the worst experience in existence. I shall to this day actively rebel against having hair like that again. 

166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religion?

Organized religion can suck it. You can’t organize your relationship with God, nor can you stick it into a little manmade box and pretend that you have the ability to create a perfect faith which others have to either follow or perish. It’s arrogant and damaging and hurtful and not at all what Christianity is supposed to mean. 

167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created?

I do. I think it’s important and something we need to think about. I do believe there is something after death, and I like to believe that my life has meaning. I think that questions of creation are important questions to ask and we can’t just ignore them.

168: Do you like to wear makeup?

Yes! It’s fun! Pretty colors!

170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully?

Absolutely. And the ones I didn’t feel like answering I simply omitted.

[a-very-fond-farewell]

The forbidden crack! Untamed prompts: 14/?

MeetCute modern!AU [mianqing edition]: “Don’t Bother Looking Down”

[title is from the song “We Fell in Love in October” by Girl in Red]

[let me live vicariously through my baby girls ok?? let me have this]

*

Qingyang wishes she never moved in this damned country in the first place. Coach Nie followed her alright, so she should be fine and, really, she is thankful for this amazing opportunity. But now she kind of regrets giving up her Lanling citizenships in order to move back to her mother’s home country and fence for the Qishan national team. She understands the language to some extent, but the people there immediately notice her accent and they glare at her whenever she speaks.

Coach Nie moved country as well just to make a champion out of her and, although he respects her for the choice she made, Qingyang knows he misses Qinghe and the people he left behind.

Getting into the national team was nothing compared to the impossible task to fit in and live a normal life. Even her new teammates don’t talk to her unless it’s strictly necessary and they always speak in that quick dialect of theirs just to gossip behind her back. Some of the guys in the male team are actually friendly and manager Xiao Xingchen is always offering to help her with this or that. Meng Yao had to leave Lanling to make the team and even his mother is, coincidentally, from Nightless City just like hers. She doesn’t like Xue Yang: barely seventeen, never heard of manners in his life, but he’s a genius in his own way and Qingyang has a lot to learn from his swordsmanship. However, his younger step sister A-Qing is the loveliest girl and the foulest mouth on the planet whenever she begrudgingly cheers for him, so maybe Qingyang could, potentially, relax a bit and have some fun while training.

But no. Their respective teams captains are actually evil and want them to suffer through impossible training sessions just to let them bask in glory without doing much themselves. Wang Lingjiao especially hates Qingyang’s guts and does everything in her power to make her leave.

It’s not Qingyang’s fault if her disgusting boyfriend had tried to give her a lift home too many times already. She wouldn’t even accept a drink from Wen Chao, let alone a lift. But one day Qingyang has enough, honest to the gods she has.

So it’s with a hollow heart that she stumbles into a random library to check if they have something to consult for her anxiety... when she sees her.

The girl that lives above her in her new apartment complex with her Grandma and younger brother. The one who always scowls at her because she never gets the trash out in time. The one who their landlady refers to with the ever lovely title of “our little overachiever” and “med-school dropout” any chance she gets. The one who apparently went to Lanling University along with Qingyang’s cousin ZiXuan and was the top of their class. The one who always runs around with the child she babysits for the rich couple at the end of the street.

And fuck no, Luo Qingyang’s not gonna mess with that.

So when she readies herself for yet another awkward encounter with the angry looking woman, the last thing she expects is to be welcomed with a blinding smile.

“Welcome, how can I help you today?”

And if Qingyang has to rely on some forced pleasantries between retail worker and client just to experience some human connection... so be it. It may be sick to ask for kindness this way, but she’ll make do.

She has to.

[details underneath]

Wen Qing hates her job. Not because she hates books, although she’s not a great reader herself (save from poetry, but nobody needs to know that), but because her boss is the epitome of “welcoming host” and she’s suffering from a chronic case of resting bitch face and forcing smiles is the last thing she wants out of life.

She came back to Qishan to look after her grandma after she broke her femur and her brother Wen Ning is studying to become a teacher and the final exam is nearing. Wen Qing didn’t want him to drop out to look after their grandma, so she left her fancy scholarship behind and came back.

XiChen is her boss at the library and took her in after his brother WangJi asked him to: Wen Qing and A-Yuan are distant cousins, but she and her brother didn’t have a job by the time the child became an orphan and their grandma was too old to look after him; hence, WangJi and his husband Wei Ying adopted A-Yuan and didn’t want him to live separated from his original family, so they moved in Qishan and frequently meet with the Wen’s.

Wen Qing feels bad about dropping out of university, but she refuses to regret it since she’s more than happy to look after her grandma. ZiXuan is a pediatrician now and several years have passed since they were classmates and competing for grades, but he checks on her through video chats every once in a while.

(ZiXuan is -coincidentally- Qingyang’s cousin and they talk a lot more than what they used to do now that he’s married and his wife is waiting for their first child. Turns out, ZiXuan is a secret matchmaking mastermind now that he is happily married and has matured enough to want his dear ones to be happy as well. So he plants the seed of curiosity in Wen Qing’s head by talking about his “hot and exceptionally talented fencer cousin who could possibly bench press a grown man. have I mentioned she’s hot?”)

...

(“Ew, do you think your cousin is hot?” / “Hot as in... lesbian terms, you get me” / “No. I really don’t. I’m straight.” / “Sure Wen Qing. Sure.”)

...

Qingyang keeps going to the library after her practice, in full gear and with her hair messy and red cheeks just to see Wen Qing smile at her and being forced to be nice to her. She absolutely knows the other woman is forced to do so and so she annoys her with pleasantries and silly things, but she never outright flirts with her [the lesbian courtship prevents the subjects from using such direct and straight(pfffffft)forward ways of approach, obviously].

...

(“I’m so sorry for forgetting about the trash the other day” / “That’s [*clenches fists*] fine. Don’t worry about it” / “Will you forgive me, Miss Wen? Really? [*Qingyang used ‘Bambi eyes’. It’s very effective!*] / “Don’t worry, that’s fine [*Wen Qing wishes the ground could swallow her whole. The nerve!*])

...

Wei Ying obviously befriends Luo Qingyang: he has to. He’s never seen Wen Qing this flustered in his life and he needs something to entertain him while Lan Zhan is at work. So he meddles bc he’s a little shit, but we all love him for it anyway.

...

(“Did you make a library card yet or...?” / “I don’t want to give that woman my ID, she might call the police on me once she gets a hold on my name” / “You literally live in the same building” / “It’s a big building. And I always misplace the trash, I’m afraid she’ll call the police on me saying I’m actually hiding a corpse in my apartment. No thank you” / “It’s a library subscription, not a birth certificate for gods’ sake” / “I’m not risking it, Wei Ying” / “Then I’ll tell you what to do.......”)

The next day at the library...

(“I want to get a card” / [*internally screeching* “took you long enough, wasting my time”] “Name?” / “MianMian”)

...

Which is apparently the wrong thing to say, because Wen Qing loves poetry and goes ballistic for any reference she can pick in normal conversations. So when she hears ‘MianMian’ she immediately goes “Then my name is YuanDao” and it’s like a fucking switch has been pressed and now WEN QING IS THE ONE PURSUING but Qingyang doesn’t know anything about poetry and doesn’t know what to do. She’s created a butch monster who actually genuinely smiles at her now and that’s too powerful for a small femme like her holy fuck.

O_o

Additional content: Jiang Cheng goes to a million blind dates until he meets XiChen out of fucking nowhere and they move in together two days later + Meng Yao seduces Nie MingJue with hot fencing routines without even sparing a glance at the older man (his drive is focused only on the medal and... for NMJ that’s kind of hot) + Wen Ning is actually a heartthrob but he’s not interested and runs away from people actually swooning at his feet left and right + Xue Yang is not a criminal and only wants his sister to finally get the service dog of her dreams + Song Lan is a referee but he gets distracted by the Qishan team manager bc... boy is he fine

o_O

[I’m suffering. Can someone write this I do not have time to commit to my own writing and I don’t trust myself with the delivery.

I’m but a tiny prompt-machine help me D:]

*

[bunnyblooms]

OKAY FUCKER ALL THE QUESTIONS FROM THAT ASK MEME THE LGBT ONE

1. Identity and pronouns.

I'm agenderfluid and they/them pronouns. My sexuality is aroflux and asexual.

2. How did you discover your sexuality?

Pretty much at 14 was like "idk i don't relate to everyone else i don't find celebrities hot or sex remotely something i want. If i could reproduce without sex i would. Oh. I'll just call myself asexual, like a sponge!" (Which asexual is incidentally what the creators of Spongebob were going for, fun facts. Spongebob is ace rights.)

3. Have you experienced being misgendered? How do you overcome it?

Mmmm I am constantly misgendered bc I'm nonbinary and live in a binary society and the way I compartmentalize it is basically just dressing how I want and not making an attempt to pass as anything tbh. The only time I feel misgendered is when someone knows my pronouns and doesn't use them anymore tbh. So basically. Letting go of how I want to be perceived helped. I will say tho, I refuse to come out to my dad bc he won't respect it and it'll be more painful hearing him misgender me knowing how I identify, but. That's certainly a privilege I have since I'm not transitioning. (ATM at least.)

4. Who was the first person you told? How did they react?

I technically didn't come out as ace. My ex-best friend knew bc I talked about it, but neither of us knew it was an identity. So the transition upon finding the label was virtually nonexistent and all of my friends were LGBTQ as well so it wasn't stressful or shocking. It helps that around the time I discovered the label I'd met two friends who were ace and felt the same way I did. My experience with my asexuality is definitely the model that should be the norm with the community and what we as a society should aim for.

As for my gender I'd made comments in the past that I wished I could just be genderless and it really kind of sat with me when my ex-best friend came out as trans bc I was like "Oh? You don't have to be the gender you are at birth?" Belial from Angel Sanctuary was a character that resonated with me at the time, and this was right around the time I made my ace friends. It wasn't until a year later that I discovered the nb community and one friend who was genderfluid that I decided to start trying different pronouns. And basically I came out as questioning and transitioned to nb without a formal declaration, which I also feel should be the goal for society.

I was at a con with my best friend at the time who was trans and he'd come out with my now ex-best friend while they were dating. And I was really anxious bc I felt like ppl would assume I was a transtrender and shit, and my friend said something about gender and I kind of awkwadly implied I might not identify as female and he was really great about it! He was like "If you wanna talk about it or try different pronouns you can." :D

5. Describe what it was like coming out.

I pretty much did this im question 4 hehehe.

6. If you're out, how did ppl react?

I'm not out to family, that I know of. They found my facebook which has my identity listed in my about, so I'm in limbo with them where none of us talk about it so idk if they register it as an LGBTQ thing or not.

My friends were all supportive! It helps that I have like no cishet friends lmao.

I also came out to my class on TDOV two years ago for a project where we step outside our comfort zone. I'm luckily in the social work program which has social justive built into the tenants of the profession so it was pretty positive! People still misgendered me after and were more concerned with "but i'm scared of ppl getting angry at me what should i do to talk about this with them" which. 9__9 Not surprising. But there was a mom whose kid and her kid's partner are both genderfluid and bigender so it was a good experience and I had an ally which made me comfortable in sharing it in the first place.

7. What is one question you hate ppl asking about your sexuality?

Inevitably when I say I'm ace, non-aces assume I have no interest in dating which. Way to conflate being aroace with ace and ignore that there are aros and aces who want relationships. That's my biggest pet peeve.

8. Describe the style of clothing you often wear.

I wear flannels and ripped jeans or shorts mainly. I basically dress like a butch lesbian. I'll wear dresses and stuff but I do not like dressing femme and prefer to offset softer things with hard things. Like. When I wear dresses I have to wear clunky combat boots with them or have short hair or something.

9. Who are your favorite LGBTQ+ ships?

Hmmm. Depends if you mean canon or not. Canon, it's probably FigAyda from D20 and Catradora from She-ra. Shion/Nezumi from No.6 is also one of my faves. There's also Chie and Ai from Virgin's Empire. Blupjeans from The Adventure Zone and JonMartin from The Magnus Archives.

As for Not Confirmed ships, I like Flick/CJ from Animal Crossing, Tsuna/Enma from Katekyo Hitman Reborn, uhhh. Reigisa from Free!, Kanji/Naoto from Persona and Chihiro/whatever the fuck his name is Mondo? Or the other guy I forget, from Danganronpa. Also RenLaw, RenStrade, and VinceLaw+VinceFarz from BTD.

(I am including straight relationships involving trans ppl obv.)

10. What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

I hate how I look with make up it makes me dysphoric. But to me makeup is a good expressive outlet and bomb as hell, so when I do wanna wear makeup, I prefer wearing eyeliner and lipstick (esp in black or blue or green or purple) and glitter.

11. Do you experience dysphoria? How does it affect you?

I experience what I refer to as Silhouette Dysphoria a lot. I experience chest dysphoria but a lot of times it's less about me having them at all and me not liking how I look with them. The same goes for my hips and overall shape. Hence silhouette. I also experience genital dysphoria to a lesser degree, and when I do it's less hating my genitals bc they should be different but more just having any at all. Luckily I was born with internal genitalia so I don't have to think about it as much. Social dysphoria I also experience, but I've talked about that already.

How I deal with it is binding and stuff.

12. What is the stupidest thing you've heard said about the LGBTQ+ community?

Hmm. The ppl who genuinely argue that accepting the community means you'll be forced to accept pedophilia or beastiality. Like. Lmao no?

13. Favorite thing about the community?

I just love how great it feels to be in it tbh. It can be so positive and loving and just genuinely make you feel good about yourself.

14. Least favorite thing about the community?

Exclusionists.

15. Have you ever been to your city's pride event?

No, but I went to Pride in Des Moines!!! IT WAS GREAT!

16. Favorite LGBTQ+ celebrity?

I don't really follow celebrities, but probably Ian McEllen and Tim Gunn.

17. Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

I was in a relationship for a while with a friend of mine and it was wonderful tbh. We met in a server and started talkng more, and started out as qpps then became partners and like we broke up, but I still enjoyed the experience and wouldn't go back in time and stop it from happening. My other qpp tho. That's something I would do lmao.

I also have a bf but that's a secret~

18. Favorite LGBTQ+ book.

I haven't read a lot of books, so I guess I have to say The Raven Cycle bc that's the only one I remember reading.

19. Have you ever faced discrimination?

Mmmm the only time I have experienced direct discrimination I was giving a friend valentines chocolate in high school and some kid called me a d*ke when i walked past him.

The other stuff is like. My therapist telling me to check for a hormone imbalance when I said I was asexual.

20. Favorite LGBTQ+ movie/show?

She-ra, "To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything", The Runaways (the movie not the show), No. 6.

21. Favorite LGBTQ+ bloggers?

I don't have any lmao.

22. Which slur do you want to reclaim?

Queer, bc it's already been reclaimed and it fits me.

23. Have you ever gone to a gay bar or drag show? How was it?

Nope. Never, but it'd be fun!!

24. How do you idrntify your gender?

Already answered this lol.

25. Interested in having kids?

Nope. I'd be too scared of screwing them up.

26. What identity service would you give your younger self?

I wish I'd known there was an ace community before I was older tbh. So that, probably.

27. What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I personally like playing a feminine role, but I also think gender roles are unecessary, so like. As long as I'm an equal I don't care what role I play lmao. If you wanna treat me like the handmaiden, as long as you're not doing it bc you see me as a woman I don't care.

28. Anything else you wanna share about your gender?

Nah. Just. I don't bother trying to pin it down anymore bc the more I analyze it the less I understand it.

29. Something you wish ppl knew about being LGBTQ+?

Hmmmm not really. It's fun outside of the systemic oppression?

30. Why are you proud to be LGBTQ+?

For me it's less about pride in being LGBTQ+ and more being proud to express myself authentically. 🤷

[gayasinstupidpodcast]

What’s up gamers!!! Our fourth episode plowed through the chaos of thanksgiving holidays and is Here w/ some Facts and Opinions about creating shit and being LGBT and how being LGBT influences creating shit. HEADS UP we recorded this while I had a cold so my voice is probably a little off, but ik Isaac put SO much work into the editing so it would be ready on time and we have recorded statements from some amazing artists (transcriptions under the cut below!) & this is honestly one of my favorite episodes we’ve done so far, so give her a listen if you’re gay or enjoy fun things!

BIG thank you once again to everyone who participated in this month’s episode!! Your contributions are so valued and so beautiful!!

You can find us on the Itunes Podcast App/Webpage at Gay As In Stupid Podcast! You can also find our episodes uploaded to Youtube and Soundcloud!

You can also follow us on twitter at gayasinstupid!

Further Reading on LGBT Artists

Montage of a Queering Deferred: Memory, Ownership, and Archival Silencing in the Rhetorical Biography of Langston Hughes

The Political Provocations of Keith Haring 

Pop art politics: Activism of Keith Haring 

E M Forster’s Gay Fiction

Alok Vaid-Menon Tells Us What It’s Like To Be Femme In Public

Shea Diamond Speaks Her Truth

Aaron’s 2018 November Recs!

Alok Alok Vaid-Menon is one of my favorite poet/activist/performance artists out there! Their writing and stage presence is gorgeous and witty in a way that’s SO clever and still feels like you’re in a room trading jokes you don’t need to explain with your closest trans friends. The way they balance their art creates a real, deeply touching experience that feels very essential to our world.

Miles (2016) Miles is set in 1999 and is a coming of age story about a gay teenager trying to get a volleyball scholarship for college in Chicago. It’s not revolutionary and it’s not over the top dramatic, but it’s funny and honest and it makes me feel nice. Definitely the movie to watch when you’ve just been through something emotionally taxing and need a light crying session and some mediocre pastries.

Isaac’s 2018 November Recs!

The Adventure Zone I know half of you already kin the Mcelroys while the other half either don’t know or don’t care, but the Adventure Zone is one of my most favorite things in the world. It’s a DND podcast (yes, all episodes are transcribed, and they have a graphic novel for the first arc of Balance with a second one on the way!) by three brothers plus their dad, and not only does it have the most amazing story and is ungodly funny, but TONS of gays (Griffin went ape with those Lesbian NPCS)! And just because they can! Same with trans characters. It’s a story where they just exist, and that’s really important to me because in a lot of media LGBT have to almost prove why they deserve to take up space. And it’s not just something that goes on in their first campaign, Amnesty also has those sweet sweet gay! I could talk about this podcast for hours, so if you needed that final push to give it a listen, THIS IS IT!

Stardew Valley You get to farm and be gay. And if THAT hasn’t sold you on this charming video game, then maybe the super cute graphics, beautiful soundtrack and a handful of interesting characters will! TBH I spend so much time playing this game it’s concerning. It’s just such a fun way to relax, and I just really REALLY like video games were I can chose to be gay. Like. God Tier. YOU CAN HAVE CROPS AND CHICKENS AND BE GAY C’MON YALL!!

The Amazing Quotes And Artists Featured!

Meg | instagram | esty

“My identity as a bisexual woman influences my art in many ways. As a woman, i create art about the issues that effect me, such as abortion and gender equality, in order to resonate with the people that matter most to me. As a bisexual individual, my subjects often appear from a gaze that falls outside of the stereotypical eye. My figure drawings and portraits all come from a place of admiration, and don’t fall into the stereotype of the male gaze or womanly care- they are the space inbetween, equally sexualized and normalized. I feel lucky to be a bi gal in the art world because it is a place that is my own to create in. There are so many queer artists that i look up to such as Mapplethorpe and Warhol, and many female artists i can cite as influence (Jenny Holzer, Kiki Smith, and Louise Bourgeois to name a few). My identity gives me a whole new world of content to draw from and allows my work to resonate with a wider audience, and I really think that any artists goal is to reach and touch as many people as possible.“  

Cameron | twitter | instagram 

“I don’t think that it influences the form really, but it definitely influences the subject matter! (Much as I hate to admit it, my identity influences the majority of choices I make in life.) I write a lot of poems about lgbtq related things and religion, as well as other stuff too. I was raised catholic, so realizing that I was “different” at more than one point in my teen years was scary AF. Being a member of the lgbtq+ community and also trying to still feel like I belong, or wanting to, in a religious community is hard, the two things are usually at a crossroads in my life so writing about them makes it easier for me to get through. My hope is that someday someone reads what I wrote and finds some peace in their own life/experience.” 

Vince | art instagram

“Well, being transgender I feel like I’m constantly aware of the lack of representation of my community, and I feel like it might be because of that I tend to experiment with showing all sorts of different type of people in my work. Because there’s so much diversity in the world, why not showcase that?”

Fox | art instagram  

“Oof…I’m gay so my characters always be gay. Gotta Fill the void in media w my own bullshit so I don’t have to rely on straight showrunners who will inevitably discard the character since they themselves seem to have no personal attachment and treat lgbt characters as disposable extras. Bc if I don’t at least attempt to create representation in the field I’m going into then I can’t rlly complain about the lack of it right? If I don’t try and change it I can’t complain about the lack of change so being an lgbt artist is lowkey Big Pressure to be revolutionary in your work but sometime…..I just wanna draw funkey animeal and that’s aight too”

Jen | twitter | instagram

“As a female bisexual poet, I worry often that my poetry and art will be too niche to be appreciated. I’ve spent years editing my poetry down to its barest bones in hopes that someone will relate to it. Changing pronouns back and forth because I worry that if I do talk about a woman, the poem will be stripped of its context and suddenly be about my queerness when in reality it never was. When I write about love and people I have dated and have crushed on, I want the poem to exist outside of the gender of who I love. I fear my authorial death will result in a complete misinterpretation of what I mean. When I write, it truly does not matter to me if I am writing about a woman or a man. If I feel what I write and I can make someone else feel it too does it matter that I also love women? I write what matters to me overall, regardless of gender, I try to make my poetry as true as possible. Sometimes, when I catch myself over editing I try to take myself back to the moment, to the person, what I loved about him or her. “

Lain | art instagram

“My LGBT Identity has significantly impacted almost all of my art, especially my work over the last two years. Ever since I have allowed myself to accept that I am trans and began my transition (6 months on T!), the impact that my Roman Catholic upbringing has had on my bisexual trans identity has bled into my artwork. Because of the way I was raised, accepting and allowing myself to be authentic has been an upward struggle. And what better way to process and document struggle than art?  

Much of my recent work has had a focus on the trans body, particularly the “sanctity” of self-actualization and the god-like power that comes with accepting and creating yourself in the unique and exceptional way that LGBT people must in order to live authentically. Two of my pieces on this topic were actually recently exhibited at UWM in the Trans-lucent exhibition, and will remain there until December 15th (I think). I got sick and tired of never seeing trans representation, so now I am creating that space that I crave in my own work.”

Kobe | instagram | soundcloud

“My art from is very influenced by my LGBT identity. It is very influenced by my LGBT black Identity. I think that whenever an artist makes their art (in my case writing music, singing, dancing) they should incorporate as much of themselves as possible. I think my LGBT identity definitely adds a sense of representation as well. I want people like me to listen to my music to know they aren’t alone. So it influences my work a lot. “

Nat | art instagram

“I think the fact that I am part of the LGBT+ community influences my art directly. Even though I don’t draw as often as I wish, I believe both my drawings and college projects (I am a 3d art/animation student), and my creativity in general is inspired by my personal experiences as a gay woman and common things experienced by the community. I try as often as I can to bring representation of some kind in the things I do, mainly personal projects. I also feel that it influences me on my motivation to keep creating; whenever I listen to, see drawings, watch movies or see whatever form of artistic expression from LGBT+ artists it gives me the energy to keep going, to keep creating.”

[dickgreyson]

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1. What do you identify as and what are your pronouns: I identify as nb lesbian, she/they pronouns

2. How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story? oo my god it was rly funny actually. i was abt 14, and like i’d always known abt gay people and liked them? and used to ask mum abt them, and she always said like “you can think abt that when ur older. u gotta do school first. thats adult stuff” so i was like o ok u turn 18 and then u just know. government issued sexuality. so one day my friend becca was talking abt wanting to kiss a girl in class (they were a few years older than me) and i was just like “wait, you can know? you can know now?” and she said yeah of course. and i just went “huh. yeah i think i want to kiss girls too” and like that was it. ofc i struggled trying to be straight later, and had a a bf when i was 16, but like i just kinda knew

lgbt+ asks!

3. Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it? i’ve been deadnamed by people who know me before, and if theyre a close friend i just get really short like “dont call me that” and they back down. bc im really chill about it for the most part, so they wont take it seriously from time to time? but usually i’m just like “nah man its james” and people are chill. I actually get rly uncomfy when family call me james bc like i want them to be as uninvolved in my personal life as possible? idk i dont exist as a gay person in family life i dont want my family to be involved in my friendships or relationships or my work or how the world interacts w me. weird huh.

7. What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality? i hate being asked what my type is. bc im into femme girls. so my friends always go “but youre the girly one” and its just. UGH. i dont like it. and then they get all like “well ur bossy but ur the girl in the relationship?” like. yeah we’re both girls thats. the point.

15. Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not? yes! my dad started taking me to sydney mardi gras when i was about 4 and i just loved it. i was a social kid so i’d float thru the crowd, chat to the dudes wearing leather harnesses, ask to wear their hats, that kinda stuff. i’d always end up caked in glitter, but i was DOTED on

20. Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show? imagine me and you is just. off the charts good. and this is a comic but, it’s lgbt media so. BATWOMAN. OH MY . GOD.

25. Are you interested in having children? Why or why not? i want a baby so bad it makes me insane. drives me absolutely crazy. every time i see a chubby baby w curly hair i just lose my fucking mind. i cant wait to share that kind of bond w someone. to introduce someone into the world, to be tender. i just want. a baby. i want to go chill at a park and get milkshakes and teach times tables and help w speeches im obsessed

30. Why are proud to be lgbt+? im not sure if i am yet. like its so incredible to be apart of a diverse and vibrant community, to be special, and to love like that. but i got some stuff to work out rn.