#bc ur a moron but ur also stupid damn it

[khaotunq]

Ryu's Adventures In... being unnecessarily cagey about your hobbies. First Kanaphan as Ryu (Wake Up Ladies: Very Complicated, 2020).

[pondslime]

do you think Bo really fucking loves orange juice or was he just looking for quick sugars to counter the blood loss?? also why did he think to do that. does he think getting nailed with an arrow to the chest is the same as donating to the Red Cross?? does he know what the Red Cross is??? whose waffle is that?? how do u just leave a waffle in there?? I bet he cooked it once and it wasn't cooked enough. so he pushed it down again for another round and then it got burnt. and he looked at it and said "dadgummit not again" and left it there to be someone else's problem. and it was the last one and Vincent came upstairs and all the waffles were gone except that one. and he sighed and looked at it for a long time. and when he saw it again in the toaster while he's fixing his damn face and his dumbass sweaty brother is like "lulul god n mama n stuff" Vincent was like. I've never seen the ocean. I bet I could drive to the ocean in, what, four hours?? buy a box of waffles on the way home. this bitch is still talking. you know he talks to himself all the time. he does an Elvis impression in the mirror sometimes. it's not good. I'm gonna do it. I'm going to the ocean. motherfucker drank all the juice too. goddammit. I hate this fucking family. wish I was adopted like Lester. "there's two more." yeah I know. idiot. there were six. what have you been doing?? having sexy garage time?? christ you suck. how are we related. where's the guy with the crossbow I'd like to have a word. he needs to work on his aim. I'll put you in a headlock and let him practice. fuck you're sweaty you smell like ass. stay ten feet away from me please. yeah whatever I'll help you I guess. already been helping but it's fine, mr. never-leave-here-without-me. mr. mayor of wax town. I crush the seniors at bingo at the country club every Wednesday and you haven't even noticed I'm gone. too busy playing every single role in Our Town by yourself. moron.

JDSFHJFHSJHFSDJHFJHFJD MEG

BACKWASHING INTO THIS ORANGE JUICE!!!!

HEATHEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

when I watched this movie for the first time last year I entirely thought that man FULLY picked up a jug of lukewarm tang off the counter and just slurped it down. bc I missed the sound of him opening the fridge jsfhjhdsfjhdsf. and I was like GODDAMN THIS SET DESIGN IS OFF THE SHITS THIS IS REALLY HOW MEN BE LIVIN. HJFDSHJHFDSJ LUKEWARM TANG ON THE COUNTER

he's so stupid dumb delirious in that scene I've watched it 37874949328 times. just like. immediately deciding to YANK that shit through his arm hsdghgfsdhgfdhs. all of the blood that was channeled directly into his murder boner in the previous scenes has made him lightheaded and he is not THINKING CLEARLY hjdsjhfsjdhsd the fact that he doesn't think to snip it off. just PULLS that THANG straight through his stupid dumb idiot arm!!! the nerve damage!!! he is so sexy for that I love a dumbass man more than anything fr

VINCENT PONDERING THE LACK OF EGGO WAFFLES BC BO WAS TOO BUSY SEDUCING HIS TOOTHPASTE STAINS IN THE MIRROR TO NOT BURN THE LAST ONE JSDJDFHJFDS

sexy garage time is taking me out jhsdajhdsajhajsdhjdsh imagine all the years of vincent being responsible for the majority of the killcount bc bo goes oogabooga I want sum fuck on my silly goofy sex swing in my gas station jsdhjfdhsjfsdhj

vincent's turning wade into a wax sculpture and chopping dalton's head off and javelining a pole through paige's head and meanwhile. bo is blasting marilyn manson and having unsuccesful murderfuck preamble in his stupid basement jfdshjfhdsjhfdsj

BO JUST STINKING OF SWEAT AND VOMIT AND BLOOD and vincent tryin to maneuver himself away from him sdhjfdshjfdsh like bitch!!! I tried to check on ur fuckin injuries!! and u told me to GIT??? like I'm a dog???? and now ur sweaty diseased sickly self is leaning over me tryin 2 talk about how sexy u are and what god took away from me??? fuck outta here lmao

dsjhgfjdshjfdsh vincent playing bingo is so fuckin funny to me I'm cryin

[i-like-writing-stuff]

sorry [five hargreeves x reader]

request: wanted to say I love ur 5 fics and how you portray their relationship as old partners :”) 💖If it’s not trouble to do (Dont feel obligated plz) I had this idea of 5 and reader having a fight and them being too prideful or bitter to apologize. Reader ignores him for some time and Five gets grumpier than usual bc of that. To the point where, one of his siblings tell him to just stop being children, apologize and give them flowers. But he finds it hard bc he is not good with that kinda of stuff ☺️

a/n: thank youuu <3, i try my best to keep the tua characters in... well, character lol- as much as possible! i hope this fic turned the way you wanted it, anyway- enjoy!!~

summary: five gets grumpy when his girlfriend gives him the silent treatment for being a jerk... shocker.

“Could you stop for one damn second and relax?!” You yelled at your boyfriend, already stressed out by the way he had been almost carving a hole through the floor of the living room with all his pacing.

“Relax?!” Five yelled, turning to glare at you, “Do you even realize how stupid you sound?! How could I relax- I lost my last lead on that fucking eye!”

“Come again?” You raised a brow, crossing your arms as you watched him curiously. Did he just call you stupid indirectly?

Your nerves were tugging at the last threads of patience you had left within you- they had been doing that for a few days. You knew that life wouldn’t be quiet when you decided to give a relationship with your partner a shot, but you never expected things to get so messy.

Not only you followed his grumpy butt all the way to 2019 to stop an apocalypse- which you couldn’t care less about, now you had been stuck in your younger bodies because he miscalculated something before traveling in time. On top of all that, he had been a jerk to his siblings- which you grew quite fond of and viceversa, he also started being an asshole to you, all because he couldn’t find a way to stop the apocalypse.

“Five Hargreeves, did you just call me stupid?” You asked, seeing that he was frozen in place, going back over his words in his mind.

“Not exactly.” He knitted his brows in confusion, before realizing the irritated look on your face, “I don’t have time for this, Y/N.”

“You think I had any time these past two years putting up with your shit?” You retorted, making him raise his brows in surprise by your sudden burst, “Screw you, asshole.”

“Now that was rude!” He yelled after you, once you started walking out of the room, completely ignoring him, “Y/N!”

You had been with the Commission for over four decades, you completely trusted its choices, since you never were given a reason not to. Well, that was until the Handler recruited Five Hargreeves. He was about four-five years older than you, but nonetheless still had the impeccable skills of an assassin- just what the organization wanted and needed.

You, being one of the Handler’s most trusted agents, she assigned him under your wing in the beginning until he’d get adjusted. So, he became your partner, it didn’t take long until he became your partner in the real sense of the word.

Five was in love with you- stupidly in love with you. He loved your wit and your kindness, he loved that he could have intellectual conversations with you for hours on end, he loved the fact that he’d feel whole again with just one look at your face, your smile, your eyes.

But he was a prideful man, he knew that. If he was wrong- which he rarely was, he had no intention of apologizing. You knew how important stopping the apocalypse was to him, but... it pained you to see him almost lose his shit completely when he loses the last remaining lead.

For the next couple of hours, you completely avoided him at all costs until he’d get that stick out of his ass and apologize. 

And he’d better have a grand way of doing it.

You knew that it was not like him- he’d never apologize, and the fact that you were avoiding him was not making it any easier on him, but you were beyond pissed. Even if he may not have meant it, all you tried to do was help him relax for a moment, take a breather before that pretty head of his would explode. And in return? 

In return, Five fucking Hargreeves continues being an asshole- what a surprise.

“Jesus, where did all the caffeine in this house go?!” Five groaned, searching the cupboards in the kitchen, feeling grumpier than usual.

“I told you- dad didn’t like it.” Allison reminded him, as she and Luther sat at the table, watching him in confusion, “What’s got into you?”

“What are you talking about?” He asked, not done yet with his search- he wanted at least something that felt like coffee, “Come on- we don’t even have... coffee flavored fucking chocolate or some shit like that..?” He mumbled, shutting the cupboard with a loud smack.

“She means... you’re... grumpier... than usual...” Luther hesitantly explained, afraid that his little-older psychotic brother might have finally snapped.

“Mind your business, will ya?” Five asked with a fake smile, stomping out of the kitchen.

“I love Y/N, I swear I do... and oddly enough, Five too.” Allison spoke up, “But honestly, what was she thinking becoming his girlfriend?”

“I am just happy for her they’re not married.” Luther shrugged, resting his hand on his palm, as Diego walked into the kitchen;

“Is it just me or is Five a lesser ray of sunshine than usual?”

The following day, you treated Five with the same coldness as the prior day, which really drove him insane. Not only he spent the night in his bed alone, since you decided to bunk for the night in one of the empty rooms, but now you were still giving him the silent treatment.

Luckily, during breakfast, the Hargreeves siblings finally managed to understand what was going on.

“Hey, Diego, do you think we can pay Eudora a visit at the station after breakfast?” You asked the man, “I promised her the other day some files to help with an investigation she has on the side.”

“Sure thing.” Diego smiled, looking forward to seeing the detective again, even if he bickered with her from time to time.

“What files?” Five asked curiously.

“Vanya, can you please pass me the salt?” You ignored him, smiling at his sister.

Vanya raised a brow, unsure what to do, as the other siblings were piecing the puzzle together. Five raised a brow, as you avoided eye contact with him, waiting for the salt shaker which was, ironically, closer to him than Vanya.

“Here.” He said, reaching for it before his sister, handing it to you.

You looked at him with a smile, then at the salt shaker that was waiting on you to pick it from your boyfriend’s hand. Instead, you scoffed, getting up from your seat with your plate in your hands, suddenly losing your appetite.

“I am gonna go change.” You declared, placing your dish in the sink, “Diego, I’ll wait for you in the car.”

“Unbelievable....” Five muttered, throwing the salt shaker somewhere on the table, before abruptly getting up from his seat to pour himself a cup of freshly made coffee- Klaus made sure to stock up since Allison and Luther told him what had happened the other day.

“Why is Y/N giving you the cold shoulder?” Diego asked his brother, raising a brow.

“Leave me alone.” Five muttered, leaving the room even grumpier, with his hot cup of coffee in his hand to at least soothe him down a bit.

“Five!” Allison yelled after him, but he was already out of there, “Urgh, he’s such a child!”

After you and Diego had left the Hargreeves mansion, Five found it hard to focus on trying to get another lead on the prosthetic eye- he could not stop thinking about the fact that it almost had been twenty four hours since the woman he loved had chosen to deliberately ignore him, all because his stupid mouth could not help snapping at her.

What a moron he was, he knew that.

“Y/N told me what happened.” Allison told her brother, entering his room softly, watching as he laid on his bed on his back, “And woah- aren’t you an asshole?”

“What do you want, Allison?” He asked, rolling his eyes, staring up at his ceiling.

“Here’s a crazy idea... why don’t you apologize?” She suggested, crossing her arms.

“Have you... met me?” Five frowned, lifting his head to watch his sister in confusion.

“Look, you and Y/N both need to stop being children!” She said, “I know you may have teen bodies, but aren’t you both like over fifty? Honestly, Five...”

“Knowing I will regret this, what do you suggest, Allison?” Five asked with a sigh, watching as his sister smirked in response.

You and Diego didn’t really take long to finish your business at the police station. In about thirty minutes, you both were back on your way home, unaware of the big surprise that was waiting for you.

You entered the house, stretching your arms, already telling yourself you needed a drink, even if it was only noon. You figured a glass of some expensive bourbon would calm you down, so you made your way in the living room, as Diego went to his room in his own business.

Although, you couldn’t help but widen your eyes in surprise, as you stopped in your tracks once your look fell on Five, who was sitting at the bar with a Margarita in one hand, and a big bouquet of flowers rested in his lap.

“Five?” You frowned, stepping towards him confused.

Never in his life, would Five ever think he’d be so happy to hear his name on your lips. He softly smiled, realizing that Allison’s plan was working, as you finally spoke to him, even if it was one word.

“Y/N.” Five gulped, setting down his glass to jump off the stool, “These are for you...” He hesitantly said, stretching his hands towards you, as he held the big, colorful bouquet of all sorts of flowers towards you.

“I... Uh... what?” You frowned, taken aback by the gesture.

Five wasn’t necessarily the romantic type, so this was the first bouquet of flowers you ever received from him. You knew he loved you with all his heart and he was in love with you, that’s why you didn’t care about the romantic gestures he never did- but, right now, watching his cheeks turn into a slight shade of pink as he was biting on his bottom lip anxiously- your heart melted.

Allison had given him all sorts of advice on how to apologize to you with the help of Vanya, since they were both well aware of the fact that their brother was not capable of saying such words by himself. But right now, as you stood before him, Five had forgotten all that they taught him.

“I... I suck at this kind of stuff, I gotta be honest.” Five sighed, stepping closer to you, still with the bouquet in his hands, as you were still hesitant, “I... I shouldn’t have snapped at you, Y/N, I know. You didn’t deserve to be told that, even if I didn’t mean it at all. I swear, I was only mad and I never meant to take it out on you.”

“Oh my God.” You covered your mouth in shock, “Are you... actually... trying to apologize to me?”

“Sort of... yeah...” Five sighed, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly, “Look, what I am trying to say... What I am trying to say is that I appreciate your love, and having your support with me, and I know you care about my well-being.”

“Keep going...” You smirked, stepping closer to him, “Come on... they are three simple words.”

“Right...” Five sighed, running a hand through his hair, “Look, Y/N? I... I am...”

You didn’t even let him finish, as you softly took the bouquet out of his hand not to squish it, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him into a tight hug. You knew how hard it must have been so far for a know-it-all like Five to say that, so you didn’t want to push him further. To you it was enough that he at least felt sorry for bursting like that.

“I love you.” Five sighed, wrapping his arms around your waist, “And I truly mean what I said earlier.”

“I love you too.” You smiled, not yet pulling away from the loving embrace, “And I know... I know...”

Five pulled away to smile down at you, “Thank you for being so understanding... and supportive.”

“I’d say it is my pleasure, but I’d be lying.” You teased him, bopping his nose with the free hand that was not wrapped around his neck still and holding the flowers.

“Hilarious.” Five sarcastically said, slowly leaning in, “I think I liked it better when you weren’t talking.”

“Really?” You scoffed, but before you could continue the playful banter, Five had already captured your lips into a soft kiss, finding a better way to shut you up.

[not-me-simping-for-blasty]

Imma drop in and say this because I know damn well I’m right even in the slightest. Buut if Bnha were to do like a formal prom/dance I feel like for katsuki and his crush it would have the dynamic of Ron and Hermione from Harry Potter. Him unable to ask her so he bullies her for not having a date, outa spite she says yes to someone and at the dance katsuki is just pissy the whole time and tries stealing her from her date leading to dumb arguments. You cannot convince me otherwise I feel this in my soul man.

I absolutely adore your work you’re the best!! <3

firstly, tysm!!! also, pls bc now that u said it i have to add,, u got me thinking about it sm rn

- pls he’ll be so mad in the days leading up, after he finds out u said yes to somebody, it’s just a constant stream of “that guy is fuckin’ stupid. you’re an idiot for saying yes. you look even fuckin’ dumber than usual.” or “jesus, if you’re so fuckin’ happy about it why don’t you just marry him. fuckin’ pathetic.”

- n he’s so mad about any little gifts you recieve from your date,,, so angry to the point that if he can intercept them, he will. like, a note left on your desk? in the trash. chocolates at your locker? he’s eating them in front of you and telling you they’re from a girl who asked him; it’s an attempt to make u jealous that obvi doesn’t work. 

- katsuki insists on going in the same group with you and your date,, and ur just like ‘but i thought you hated him??’ n he just blows up at u like ‘yeah? and who fuckin’ asked u? what the hell does it matter if I like him or not? he’s not my date, obviously, bc i’m not a fuckin’ idiot like u. so shut the hell up about it, it doesn’t matter, i’m going.’

-pls at the dance he’s so petty,, like ur date is so nice and asking ‘oh, Y/N do you want a drink?’ n katsuki answers for u like ‘yeah. she does. so many of them, so don’t fuckin’ come back unless you’ve got the entire table- actually, don’t fuckin’ come back at all. extra.’

-and ofc u freak the hell out bc why would he talk for u, and katsuki just shrugs. just shrugs and smirks. and when ur date walks back with like six cups of punch and an apologetic smile, katsuki tells him you’re not thirsty anymore eyeroll

- pls and then at the end of the night, when you’ve had enough of his bs and start yelling, katsuki just rolls his eyes and blushes and turns around to say ‘the only reason you look stupid, is because you’re choosing to hang around with an idiot extra. i’m not an idiot fuckin’ extra. it’s an easy fuckin’ choice; even for a moron like you.’ n just expects u to understand that weird statement as a confession

-obv it doesn’t work bc why would it, so he confesses fr like a week later and only after y’all kiss does he say ‘don’t wear that dress around other people ever again.’ somebody kill him pls i hate him sm

[quolant]

tee & bee on sports night (1.08)

hey we're tee & bee and ur reading abt sports night on tumblr — where @thxngam live reacts to sports night in 2021 and sends me stuff and i post it

sports night (1.08) — thespis

Why is there a 24 pound frozen turkey in the light grid?

Ah

Dana defrosting a turkey on the light grid seems insanitary

I don’t eat meat so I don’t actually know how defrosting a turkey works but that doesn’t seem clean

Or safe

What if it falls?

Somehow, making a dry run on a turkey seems exactly like a Dana thing

Casey’s a moron

“Alberto Salazar wins his second New York marathon?”

MORON

Literally a moron but I love him

Jeremy why are you talking about Thespis?

THE LOOKS ON ALL OF THEIR FACES

“Tell me I wasn’t supposed to know that?”

Also I find it surprising we know the exact date the first words spoken in a play were 

I’m very curious as to what happened on November 23 for Dan and Casey

Is it their anniversary or something? And I don’t even mean that in a joking way

Bee has prepared me that this ep might be tough? But I also don’t know why at all so I’m just anxious

Isaac babbling about his son in law rehearsing the route is very sweet

I have a soft spot for grandpas and he’s about to be one so

Still her voice tho

OMG IT IS THEIR ANNIVERSARY

“We didn’t do anything untoward?”

Casey is being kind of an asshole abt it

It clearly means something to Dan

“Impersonating my ex wife has never won a place in my heart”

Casey I hope u realize how gay it is for you to be having relationship spats with ur boyfriend

I can’t believe Sorkin wrote this and then expected us to believe this was a totally platonic relationship 

“There’s a god of gymnastics?”

Damn

They look impressed at Jeremy!

Tbh I am too

He’s a nerd

Casey’s still being an asshole

“I remember at the time not thinking you were a woman.”

And that’s just sexist 

Oh fuck

I feel so bad for Isaac

And his poor daughter

THE TURKEY FELL

THEIR FACES IM CRYING

Is this whole ep going to be over their broadcast bc this is slightly boring ngl 

Dan is so mad lol

Omg now they’re fighting

I’m nervous

“What was good enough for Lisa?!”

I’m scared 

Oh god Casey left angrily

Okay, he’s talking to Isaac

Isaac still looks gutted tho 

Which is understandable

I’m scared for him

Okay okay okay did they not realize comparing the elderly man and his wife’s issues to two young, kind of queer coded friends’ fight was very VERY gay?

It makes Dan and Casey seem even more like a married couple?

“You gotta show people how you feel about them Casey.”

DOES NOBODY REALIZE THAT THAT SOUNDS LIKE ISAACS SAYING CASEY SHOULD TELL DAN HE LOVES HIM?

“You make a gesture. You remember an important date.”

THIS! IS! SO! MARRIED!

“Small price to pay for what you get in return. For what you get in return, it’s a steal.”

JFC

I don’t even know what to say 

Aww Isaac and Casey are hugging 

That was the sweetest scene

This Thespis thing is incredibly entertaining

Dana is losing her mind and I love her 

“You can’t just make it my business”

“Well I-I just did!”

I’m using that

I don’t know when but I’m gonna work it into conversation

Also it’s very kind what Jeremy is telling Dana

I’ve never celebrated Thanksgiving but it’s good someone’s shocked Dana into not worrying about her mother 

“For a guy who’s read the Hobbit 14 times you’re not so dumb.”

LMAO DANA

Also those four minutes are over I’m pretty sure this is way longer than the time Natalie told them they had free 

“I was going to buy you some flowers in the way back frim the control room-“

For someone who listened very attentively when Isaac was taking to him, Casey’s still being a dick

Oh okay

Well at least Casey’s telling Dan the truth

“Are you stupid?!”

“You would’ve been great.”

Dan's utter confidence in Casey is kind of overwhelming to watch 

Maybe it’s bc I’m emotionally stunted

Okay now Dans kind of implying Lisa was emotionally abusive

Which idk if it’s true or not but buddy, it seems to be implied that Casey left Late Night to work with you

Which is more of a reflection on Casey than it is Lisa

I’d understand why Lisa would be mad

Late night??

Jfc

“You would’ve been very good.”

“Thank you.”

The looks on both of their faces is just

So sincere

It’s kind of hard to watch

It’s like watching PDA 

“But thanks for saying so.”

The look of Dan’s face is KILLING me

Also I’m still scared for Isaac

“I appreciate the gesture.”

Awwwww

YES ISAAC'S GRANDSON IS HERE

Dan and Casey have cigars in their mouths

I don’t know why but they seem like children

“Ladies and gentlemen…Thespis has left the building!”

Lol Dana was right about the top half of the show thing

I liked this ep but it doesn’t seem like the kind to rewatch

I spent half of this ep in anxiety about several things which was interesting but oh boy 

Anyway

It was good!

I liked it a lot

Happy endings all around

I’m still a little out of wack over that very intense Casey and Danny scene

Also if it weren’t for the fact that this was between two men and if it was a straight couple this would totally be romantic 

The only thing that’s not romantic about this is the fact that they never say it

Other than that it sounds exactly like relationship dramas in straight couples in media

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

who r ur titans favs babe ?? also tell us ur thoughts after u finish the three bc u will have so many of them !

I think my favs are Dick, Gar, and Rachel!! Jason and Donna were too 🥲

Here are my thots across all 3 episodes so far, I’m reacting as I go :D

I heard speculation that Jason isn’t really dead and that he’s gonna come back as Red Hood but idk he seems pretty dead to me Bruce literally buried him snddnndndndnd

Bruce finally went off his rocker and honestly Joker deserved it like yeah honor code etc etc but this freak had to be shanked at some point like come on he kept escaping and killing ppl enuff is enuff

ever since Dick became Night Wing I have been more feral than ever

Right so the new guy is Deathstroke and I got confused for a sec cause I watched Arrow way back when and since DC likes to cast multiple people to play the same character in different shows and movies (🙄) i was like who tf is this 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

Dick and Barbara….. 👉👌 👀 this man sleeps with all his teammates like damn first Dawn and then Kory and now Barbara….he’s neck-deep in vigilante vag love that for him

Hank’s hilarious I wanna give him a hug

Connor and Krypto are adorable every show deserves a lovable himbo

WAIT I TAKE EVERYBRING BSCK JASON’S ALIVE????!/!;$2$:&2&/ AND HE’S BAD NOW??? HELLO! !2!;!3!;!3!!:3!!33! BUT I WAS RIGHT JASON IS RED HOOD BUT I FORGOT RED HOOD WAS A VILLAIN I MISTOOK HIM FOR RED ARROW NOOOSKDKEKSKSJ SO THATS NOT DEATHSTROKE BUT I SWORE IT WAS CAUSE THE MASK IS ALMOST IDENTICAL BUT I SHOULD HAVE KNOW CAUSE DEATHSTROKE USES KATANAS NOT GUNS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WAIT SO WHO’S IN THE GRAVE 👁

There’s no body in the grave what the fuck is going on 🧍‍♀️

“If Bruce knew he never would have killed the Joker” yikes so Dracula went off the rails for no reason 😳😬

the Raʼs al Ghul and Lazarus Pit reference 👁👁👁 Donna 👁👁👁👁

JASON’S CRYING GONNA BAWL WHAT IS HAPPENING

Hank’s gonna try and kill him isn’t he

This little shit’s gone psycho oh god it was that super steroid he manufactured like a fucking moron

This sudden villain arc is happening too fast it feels so artificial and dumb djdndndndndnsn

He killed Hank 🧍‍♀️ for no reason 🧍‍♀️ also his little speech was so stupid like “I grew up” wtf does that even mean it’s been 2 days

those are my thoughts thus far I feel like this show might be going downhill cause this villain arc is way too random sjdnsjjdjdjfjdj

[boom-boom-boyx2]

Rainy days~

Includes: KamiBaku, DekuXTokoyami & has cussing, warning is BL and theirs a lot of mistakes don’t take it to heart ;p

“Babe, it’s pouring outside your gonna kill your self.”

“Babyyyy” the blonde actually said his first word all morning, “oh? And it can talk~?” The taller blonde who was actually awake mocked the shorter blonde attached to his waist. “Idiot, get up, we have work-” “no.” The shorter blonde pouted, “I’m not going today. We bOTH need a break and plus, we haven’t had a day by ourselves in a while” he looked at the awoken blonde with pleading eyes. “No. Denki Kaminari, get your cute* ass up right now and get dressed. We can stay home on a rainy day maybe but not today. “

Durring break on Tuesday night

/they both took the night shift thinking they might be partners but ended up on opposite sides of the city/

——————————————————————————

⚡️dunce face☀️ 💥Katsuki 🥰

Moron, I checked the weather, it said it’ll rain tomorrow night, I meant it when I said we should stay home on a rain day

Babbyyyyy~ I already put in that I’m working tomorrow morning🥺😭

🙄great- call in sick. I fucking. Dare. You.

No, kat. I can’t do that! I’ll get my ass kicked by kiri if I skip another day Bc it’s raining☹️

Babe. If ur sick, and it’s ducking raining. You’ll kill everyone. 😤you knOW THIS!

I’m not that stupid Katsuki!

Hey. Your not fucking stupid. So don’t imply that you are.

Sorry kat...♥️

Sure🖤 now go back to work keep shitty hair busy

You to! Try not to hurt MidoBro to much today☺️

Yeah sure, I’ll ‘try’

———————————————-———————————

“Kachan! We’re partners!!!” Midorya yelled from across the street, “tch, I’m sooo lucky aren’t I?” Bakugou said in a mockingly implied tone. “Aww, Kachin what’s wrong? You seem a little more pissed off then usual..” Izumi kept a worried look in his eyes. “I’m fucking fine nerd, I just want a fucking break with husband for once.” He angry blonde looked at the greenette beside him and sighed, “I shouldn’t even be telling you this..” the greenette look at him with understandment, “ah, one of those days, I get it” he sighed and continued, “my husband and I barely get any time alone either” he let out an uneasy chuckle. The blonde then spoke and continued to walk as they were just doing portals today, “how is the Bird Brain any ways?”

They continued to talk for a bit till they finished patrolling and they went to the station to fill out some paper work then went home

“Babyyyyyy” “what? I’m getting ready to take shower, you should to.” “I’m offended! Do I stink that ba-“ he was cut off by his own groaning, “ew, okay. I’m taking a shower with you!” “Ew, cuck no- get awayyyyyy” he groaned as denki grabbed his waist and ouch him in the shower, with his clothes still on. “Kaminari. I swear to fucking pikachuu. If you turn the fucki-“ he was now soaking in his black tank top in th shower. a mischievous Kaminari outside the shower door with a smile as cocky as wide ran across his face. “Whatcha gonna do about it? Huh?” Kaminari said in between laughs, “your actually a child.” He said sighing then a sleek emerged on his face. “Oh no..” the famous last words before a disaster. “AHH! NO! KAT WAIT!!” Katsuki pulled his husband into the water with him.

- after the shower they both layer in the living room and watched TV till 1am-

“Achoo! Ew,” the blonde looked down at his hunband whose hair he’d been play with sense TBEY got out of the shower, “oh shît! Babe! I’m so sorry!! Are you okay!!” He quickly became scared and jumped up to look at his husband, “ugh, I will NEVER get used to that.” He shook his head hoping that a few brain cells were still working and maybe his vision might just come back to normal. “Kat, are you okay? I’m really sorry! I usually can feel it coming and I didn’t!!” The usually angry blonde was rather quiet and calm, he smiled and looked at his husband, “oh no, I THINK I KILLED HIM!” Kaminari started freaking out till he got interrupted by katsuki’s yelling “WOULD YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!? It’s 2 o’clock in the gOD DAMN MORNING. I’m not. Dealing with your shit right now. Sit back down. Play with my FUCKING hair. We can worry about everything tomorrow.” Denki looked at Katsuki with surprise, had it been so late that he didn’t care? Or maybe he zapped him so hard he forgot...No, Katsuki had to have been so tired that he was speaking nonsenses. “Babe. You need to go to sleep, we still have work tomorrow morning! And I think I cried your brain..” “no. Your getting over here and cuddling me and when I come back with blankets you better have fucking popcorn made.” The grumpy Katsuki shot back at Denki. “But- no! We have work tomorrow, or at least I do!” “No, you. Fucking. Don’t.” He came back and hugged his husband around the waist from the back, “your sick. And I have the day off. You can’t go-it’s rainy. And your sick. Deal with it.” “I- baby, you know I can’t do that.. and it was just one sne-“, he was cut off my his own sneeze, “fuck...” Katsuki kissed his husbands neck and turned off the TV. “Hey, Dunce Face. Com’ere .” Katsuki said while walking into their bedroom and turning off al the lights of their appointment, “I wanna go to sleep. And you need it, I’ll make soup in the morning for your cold.” Kaminari came in and sat down on the bed, “baby I can’t just not go tomorrow bc it’s raining and I’m sick, what if they need me-” all of Kaminari s worries stoped for just a moment while Katsuki kissed him. “Babe. Calm down. Theirs plenty of hero’s that can help, and I need you more, you said it yourself, we haven’t had a day to just ourselves... I was talking with Deku the other day and he said him and Tokoyami keep one day every week for a date night/ spending time with eachother in general, we need that... we both over work ourselves so much sometimes I think we both deserve a break, okay? So please, please Kaminari. Stay home with me tomorrow and let me treat you and spoil you with affection.” Kaminari was sure he stoped breathing, was this really* his husband, the one that only called him babe or dunce face sense they were in high school had just called him Kaminari, in a ‘non-threatening’ sense... he also just said he wanted to spoil him with affection...and tbis all came from the man who would barley want a hug in public, I mean sure! He likes to make out in public when he’s jealous but this was just weird. Kaminari could feel his face turning red and he feel down onto the bed. “Babe, are you alive.....babe! Babe- I wanted goodnight kisses. BABE!?” “Oh fuck! I’m okay! Are you okay?” “I’m fucking fine. Now lemme kiss you so we can go to sleep.” Kaminari quickly took his shirt off and layer next to his husband after Bakugou got his kiss. “Baby” the tired blonde turned around and looked at his, still blushing, husband “what’s wrong honey?” “I’m looking forward to the soup tomorrow morning..” they both smiled and kissed one last time, “I love you Denki Kaminari.” “I love you to Katsuki Bakugou.”

——————————————————————————

⚡️The end Loserz💥

[facelessxchurch]

What’s ur opinion on the whole mev cheating on his wife w abby thing

oh boy oh boy I hAvE OPinIonS on tHiS

I really fucking hate it. I bitched about it before here.

Mev is a complete bastard, but I absolutely don’t see him as someone that would cheat on his wife or sleep around, straight up bc he’s too arrogant/picky. That jerk has forbidden people to fucking look at his face, what do you think are his opinions on people touching him, let alone, his dick.

Why would he fuck that cheap ass cat-suit-wearing whitetrash crackwhore when he’s married to a queen??

Apart from that it would also be insanely STUPID of him to fuck Aby. Not only would that piss off his wife, but he would also risk angering his most powerful, emotionally unstable and very violent general. Vile is that weird guy at work that barely speaks, no one knows a damn about and makes everyone uncomfortable and you’re just waiting for him to one day show up with an AK-47 to work and mow everyone down with it as some sort of weird revenge on society as if it’s Joey from ITs fault that Nef is a sadistic lil bitch. Yeah, I’m sure that’s the guy you wanna piss off for a cheap fuck.

Jesus fuck, Landy made Mev a fucking moron in phase two. First that dumbass somehow gets stabbed to death by the fucking plot-device baby after that lil shit gotten the shit beaten out of him by Skulduggery (who even as Vile is weaker than Mev as comfirmed by Landy on twitter), he fucks up finishing the Unnamed by doing a shitload of n00b mistakes and now THIS!? Mev went from being the mysterious big bad of phase 1 to the village idiot in phase 2 and I’m so fucking pissed about it. He’s being done so fucking dirty without any.fucking.on-screen.appearances.

But through all the bullshit that Mev has been dragged through in phase 2 this is the worst.

And for what!? There was no pay off, no nothing. The ‘plot twist’ was predicatable (I saw mulitple people predict this) and the only one who was emotionally affected by that was macaroni boi, a character who barely got screentime and got killed off fairly quickly giving people barely any time to get emotionally invested in this character. The bone-baby plot was completely pointless thanks to Skuls reaction to this being basically non-existant. If he had the emotional range of a stone in phase 1 he now has the emotional range of a dead stone on phase 2 considering that the whole ex showing up with what could possibly be his kid would be a situation that would fuck everyone emotionally up.

This is all so fucking pointless OMG and I’m hoping it will get retconned so that Aby was lying about Mev being the father as a fuck-you to Serafina, just like I had hoped that macaroni boi killing Mev would be false information from China, but unfortunately was confirmed as true by the pasta boi himself when he was like ‘omg I killed my dad’ bc of fucking course with all the retconning going on in phase 2 it ain’t getting used to fix Landy’s bullshit mistakes but instead to add more fuel to the fucking dumpster fire that the entirety of phase 2 is. Go fucking figure.

[pyronado-moved]

HEY ALEX :) hope itz alright bUT i wanna kno abt ur ocz if thtz ok!!!! aka basically *hands you a free pass 2 gush abt ur ocz* go wild. i wanna kno everything i can abt ur ocz bc im rlly interested !!!!!! :D

gasp tysm

this is an under the cut kinda thing bc i have... a lot to say abt my babies

okay so the main oc of this is carter and hes the anti-christ but hes actually super sweet and just a walking talking puppy with a heart of gold. he can do no wrong and i love him to death. he’s dedicated to loving his bf, his friends, and his mom and sometimes he dedicates himself to hating his dad.

then there’s his bf jackson who’s a sad boy until carter moves in w/ his mom who is jackson’s next door neighbor and they end up getting along rlly quickly and jackson is just suddenly ‘huh what if im worthy of love’ and suddenly he has friends and bf and hes baby

and carter’s friend serah is a half-angel who has 1 volume setting and its Loud As Fuck but thats okay. she’s a lowkey stereotypical dumb blonde but at the same time shes the only one of the group who knows the symbols for every element. she’s been dating brick for 6 years and has yet to even consider dating anyone else

and serah’s bff violet is just a normal human girl who’s head cheerleader and constantly angry. she pretends to not care abt a lot of things but she’s actually a total mother hen. she spends so much time around people in relationships that she starts hating them until she meets roga and suddenly decides love might not be That Bad Actually

vi’s twin brother and serah’s bf brick (aka chad but thats a dumb name so he goes by brick) is literally baby. he’s sick a lot so he lives his life to the fullest in any way possible. he worries abt his friends who constantly have to fight demons and monsters and shit but hes always ready to help no matter what.

carter’s bff and ex-boyfriend jae is an incubus with half a brain cell. he does not use it and is an idiot. he met violet and the two instantly decided that they would cause problems on purpose. hes basically the goose from that one game except gay. he and ara are stupid idiot bfs who are a whole ass foot apart in height and it only adds to the chaos. he dated carter for 1 whole month before they decided ‘nvm actually’ and went back to being best bros.

umm classic mean girls Paris, Trixie, and Chloe are there. Paris wants to use carter to summon the devil. trixie and chloe are just there bc theyve been friends since kindergarten and wanna make sure paris doesnt do anything super stupid. theyre all girls who support girls who want to summon the devil and thats rad.

AND THEN THERE WERE THE 7 DEADLY SINS WOW! They were hired to be the devil’s guardians but then they got bored of that so they fucked off to earth and tried to live normal lives until oops their ex-boss’ son is here now and they have to protect that ray of sunshine out of both spite and pity. they’re all basically siblings and stupid. also they dont meet carter and the gang until college years so like... all the ones up there are adults when they meet the guys down here to avoid any confusion.

Arazukiean is the sin of lust and he’s a siren. hes a trans king who met jae and decided that legally no one else could have him. all he does on earth is attend different colleges because he didnt register as a legal living human so now he just wanders around campus’ and sits in on diff classes. he doesnt rlly represent his sin bc he never even liked being a siren in the first damn place.

Panya is the sin of wrath and she’s a pheonix and I hate to love her but god i love her. shes not a good person and shes loud and seriously if i met her irl i’d deck her in the face. but at the same time she was the one who decided they should protect carter so like... +1 karma point i guess. she and mentu-ra knew each other b4 being hired by the devil so they’re rlly close

the sin of gluttony is Lilian. She’s an aswang but also she’s just soft baby. shes a total nerd and could probably beat jeopardy tbh. although she loves all 6 of her siblings, Ameera is her closest friend/sister and they do everything together.

Ammera is an al-mi'raj and the sin of sloth. shes actually not sleepy or lazy because she decided in order to keep herself from sleeping all day she chose to not sleep at all. shes an expert on all things video games and could probably beat you in mario kart with her eyes shut. on rainbow road. 

The sin of greed is represented by local dragon idiot Roga who owns a big rich company but never participates in anything involving it. he just collects the money. hes a capitalist until he meets violet who is the only person who’s ever put him in his place. he instantly gave up being greedy for money to be a very protective boyfriend to this fiery cheerleader. they dont look like a good couple on the outside but they’re really actually soft as fuck

pride is taken by mentu-ra, a sphinx who ran for state governor in rhode island and actually won despite being a complete fumbling moron. hes a very bad politician and just kinda... exists. he hangs out mostly with roga but he keeps tabs w/ panya the most since she was the one who got him out of scrapes before they were hired as the devil’s guards.

aand then there’s elva, the sin of envy. shes a pixie who decided instead of being envious of others, she’d make them envious of her. she’s a part-time model, part-time olympic figure skater, part-time olympic gymnast. she loves the spotlight more than anything else in the world and shes very annoying but less annoying than panya so she’s got that going for her.

also i was gonna have angels as the 7 heavenly virtues but i only got around to creating penelope, the virtue of purity so she’s there. she doesnt take other people’s shit and is actually serah’s shoulder to lean on as everyone grows and starts to do their own things.

[sarinataylor]

Reverse blind date Joger where someone deliberately stands Roger up to teach him a lesson because he is such a player and John watching from the bar realises he is upset

oooooh ok. ok. ok

so roger is like. he’s got a rep around campus? it’s not necessarily a bad one per say, but. he’s pretty and he’s confident and yeah, he dates a lot. bc roger is a secret romantic tbh ok

not like freddie’s a romantic though. like freddie wants to fall in love and then never ever ever break up with the person he falls in love with because he wants to buy a house and forty cats with them. like freddie genuinely believes he’s incomplete without someone to love and be loved by in return which roger thinks is Super Unhealthy

so roger’s not romantic like that. roger just…. enjoys the excitement of  first date? getting to know someone, letting them get to know you, enjoying those first flushes of could-be-love. roger even somewhat likes when things start to fall apart bc there’s beauty in that too. there’s something beautiful in being able to recognise that you’re not right for another.

so he dates a lot. which, again, isn’t a bad thing. he doesn’t date for the sake of dating? he just. if there’s someone he finds interesting or attractive or funny? he’ll ask them out. 

(this is how he met brian who awkwardly agreed and then blurted out half way through dinner that he was straight, he just didn’t know how to say no. they stay for the whole meal and end up somehow being like… best friends by the end of it.)

(a lot of roger’s friends are people he’s dated in the past, actually)

but yanno for every sort of ex that you’re on good terms with there’s gonna be someone you’re. decidedly not. and ok, rog will be the first? (maybe second actually, freddie will generally be the first) to admit that he’s sometimes not the most….. tactful at breaking off some of the more casual dating he does

like he doesnt ghost on actual relationships but there’s…. there’s definitely some ghosting that’s gone down in the past. some very early cases where he wasnt very clear on the non-exclusive nature of the dating??? 

he was young(er) and stupid okay he has like. a comprehensive set of rules now (a. establish that dates are not exclusive unless explicitly discussed, as all major relationship developments should be. b. no fucking the people you date unless you’re interested in an Actual Relationship bc it blurs lines!!!!! it confuses ppl!!!!!! c. if someone has a rep as a clinger listen to that reputation instead of their insightful analysis in class. the reputation precedes interesting dinner conversation. every. time.)

(brian is like???? have u heard YOUR reputation???? and roger is like well yeah but. no one calls me clingy, do they? which brian has to concede that, no, they decidedly do not.)

BUT the important thing to note here is that roger dates a lot of people because he genuinely enjoys dating people, he enjoys getting to know people. he asks out people who he finds interesting for some reason or another. he’s not offended when people say no, like. that’s fine. 

but yeah. he gets stood up. 

which? it’s like. the first time it’s ever happened. and it’s embarrassing. like, if they weren’t interested he would have preferred they just said. but it’s fine? like. he’ll just. eat on his own. that’s fine, he’s not too bothered though he does wish that they’d like. messaged him to let him know they were standing him up so he could have ordered earlier instead of waiting half an hour

but then they Do message him. a catty message along the lines of “now you know how it feels to be let down. maybe you’ll think before you do it to someone else again” and That upsets him because… he’s never stood anyone up???? would never intentionally leave someone waiting????? and he’s Grown Up since his first year of uni where he ghosted people like. he’s really upfront nowadays but he just sort of. starts spiralling a little bit sat at the table gulping down red wine like???? fuck???????

a fun mix of anger that this was clearly something this person PLANNED and also anxiety that maybe he’s been doing this to people this whole time and he just never noticed???? he’s an Awful Person and he just. didn’t know. 

(which like. the sheer amount of his ex-dates, ex-fucks, and straight up exes that are still friends with him sort of implies that this is not the case? one of his exes is getting married in six months and he’s one of the groomsmen somehow like.)

and JOHN is sitting at the bar. like he’s waiting for his roommate to finish her shift so they can head home together but her shift’s been extended so he’s just. hanging out. eating complimentary bar nuts and being slipped sneaky beers by the on floor manager. and he’d noticed roger walk in, roger had ta’d one of his classes a year or so back and he knows his rep, and he’d sort of been looking forward to watching The Master At Work

like. he was gonna take notes so that he and ronnie (roommate, obvs) could laugh about it when they got home

(roger totally asked ronnie out once. she didn’t even answer, just walked away. she was annoyed at how charming the sound of him laughing as she did so was. she sort of hates him that “he’s never done anything to me and everyone i know who knows him says he’s a nice bloke BUT I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT” kind of way)

but uh. yeah. he’s been stood up. 

and john’s like….. damn. like, he wouldn’t even stand roger taylor up. he’s always been kind of glad that roger’s never asked him out, and never will bc…. he’s p boring and not like ronnie or brian or anyone else roger’s dated, bc he knows he’d say yes and then ronnie would never let him live it down. not ever. 

and like he seems to be rolling with it? he orders himself a bottle of wine and an appetiser which has john like Damn the man be RICH

(the man be decidedly NOT rich and is definitely not going to be able to pay for the bus for the next week now he’s spending his “extra” money on bottles of wine rather than the glass or two he had planned to buy. but whatever, he can walk it. not to mention splurging on the bread platter instead of the bruschetta. he’s been stood up, okay??? if there was ever a time to eat All Of The Carbs and wash it down with two bottles of wine, this would be it)

and then after like one glass? of wine? he just seems to sort of curl in on himself???? and he seems genuinely upset???? like he’s tapping sort of frantically on his phone and he didnt even say thank you to the waiter who brought over his Bread Palooza and john doesnt know him well but. he never seemed the kind of guy who wouldnt thank wait staff okay?????

and before he can even stop himself he’s trailing over there, bar nuts in hand, and awkwardly standing next to the table silently. 

and roger is like distractedly not even looking up from stuffing bread into his mouth and texting freddie who isn’t responding which means, he guesses, that he didn’t get stood up on his date tonight. bully for him. so roger’s like yeah thanks mate not ready to order my main yet. 

and john’s like…. uh. ok. and just thrusts the bar nuts he’s had in his hand for like. ten minutes under his nose like you look sad, do you want a nut?

and roger looks up and just sort of blinks at him for a long moment before bursting out laughing like yes yes i would like a nut, thanks, john

which has john flustered bc a) he’s a MORON oh my god “do you want a nut”??????? what is he????? he wants to DIE and also b) roger. remembers his name?????????

so john stammers out an apology, explains he’s waiting for ronnie (”ronnie…. oh, uh, you probably don’t remember who she is, she’s-” – “your roommate, right? i forgot she was a waitress here, actually. how is she?” – “….. she’s good. sorry, how do you know she’s my roommate?”)

which leads to roger inviting him to sit down as a family of four tries to move past him, but can’t because he’s making a bottleneck in the aisle

so john. sits. bar nuts still in hand. 

(knees weak, hands sweaty, restaurant’s bar nuts. would the real slim shady please stand up?)

and roger’s just hella casual like “yeah just got stood up bc im an awful person, how u been”

and john’s like uh technically i asked for none of that information 

and the waiter comes and interrupts as roger sort of just blinks at him bc john is Not The Best at unplanned social interaction. like john approached him??? but ok. and the waiter is like um? hi john? given up on waiting for ronnie to finish?

as roger slam dunks his last glass of wine 

and john is sort of like ohw ell. this guy used to be my ta and he looked sad because he’s been stood u- oh my god, im so sorry

and roger is just. you know what? this has been fun. i’ve really enjoyed the multiple levels of abject humiliation that i have endured tonight but i think i’m going to cut it short and just chucks  thirty quid on the table like thanks (to the waiter) and good luck with the, uh, engineering? degree, i think? (to john)

who is bewildered bc how the fuck does he remember what degree im doing from the round of fucking ice breakers we did in the first tutorial of a class i took LAST YEAR 

(roger’s party trick is remembering like. everything about ppl. you know in that way that really popular people have where somehow they can remember that your second cousin twice removed got married three years back, despite not seeing you since a month before the wedding, and they’re asking how it was using the NAMES of the bride and groom (who. they’ve never met) and you’re like??????? i fuckin forgot the grooms name what the FUCK. i hate these people with a passion. nice people? the worst. john feels much the same as i do)

and before he can even say anything roger has just…. slunk off into the night. leaving him with the waiter who is quite happy about the ten pound tip, and a hand full of bar nuts. 

anyway roger goes home to cry at brian who is like. ur not a bad person, people just….. come to conclusions about ur behaviour based on the exaggerated experiences of others. but u also WERE sort of a dick when u were 18, but so is…. like every 18 year old so i honestly just wouldn’t torture myself ab it so neither should u

(a boldfaced LIE. this conversation leads brian to spend the entire night staring at his ceiling and reliving that one time he forgot to say thanks to the bus driver when he was 16. the bus driver hates him, he knows. also he used to have super unacknowledged misogynistic and racist unconscious biases that had been pounded into him by society and he’s still trying to rectify that and????? oh GOD)

 and the next day, after he’s been convinced that he’s not the scum of the earth by brian, he rocks up outside of john’s class (which he abuses his access to the university database for the first and last time to find – he also tells john he did this immediately bc he’s like SO I PROBABLY CROSSED A BOUNDARY BUT IT WAS THIS OR STALK RONNIE AT WORK UNTIL SHE GAVE IN AND I THINK THAT WOMAN HATES ME i see her glaring all the time and idk why) and totally asks him out because…. well, he was interesting, wasn’t he?

[bnha-imagines-hcs]

A c and e for dabi and twice? (I’m such a slut for the villains oops

( i’ll assume SFW, since that’s the last one i posted and you didn’t specify. | idk if any of this makes sense bc my head is weird atm but i wannit to write!!! i’ve been spooking myself with conspiracy theories... )

| dabi; headcanons.

AFFECTION       yes. now? always.

why else would he bother with a relationship? no trouble getting laid and able to snatch intelligent convos in a bar or park here and there, dabi’s no need to go out of his way for either.but proper, fulfilling affection comes with someone you trust - to an extent.

so. yeah. 

dabi’s always wanted a partner he could truly stand with. side by side, neither lesser or more than the other; whether this would be a romantic partner or not never mattered. a strong, reliable bond that doesn’t hinge on emotional constipation like so many of his working relations. 

                  a, uh. soul mate. if you will. shhh.

      he’s entirely honest with himself about this wish, too - which means he’s not shy about acting on it. unless he has his game face on or you’re around people who shouldn’t know you care about each other, dabi’s open to physical and not so physical affection.around here we’re not too macho for staring deep~~ into each other’s~~ eyes~~ (esp since his are so pretty that it’s hard not to ever get caught staring so yah). he prefers to have at least one hand at you at all times, soaking up your warmth and returning it. idle kisses during conversation, words clear against your cheek, the corner of your mouth. it’s in private that he lets his fingers trace the thin vulnerable skin of your eyelids or the exact shape of your cheeks.

ppl can complain or gag all they want, dabi is and will always be demonstratively loving. (or just. out of fucks to give, but w/e.)

CUDDLING     linked into the affection - dabi is highkey about simple, physical contact. arms around you at all times and usually while he’s behind you (better view on anything that might need to be u know dodged. he protective rawr); resting on your shoulders, round your waist, fingers hooked into the belt loops and fingers tracing the shape of your crotch if you don’t stop him, fingers hooked into the beltloops at your hips, hands at your hips, one arm round your neck w/ a hand on ur shoulder, hand on ur throat, hand resting lightly on ur crown, hands…… on ur ass. yeah.

will shamelessly insert himself into any conversation just by silently curling around you, and staring down ur convo partner like they’re the wall or smth ‘bout to get curbstomped; either, or.other times he lets u be… but still touches u somehow. turned farther away but with a hand on u to know where u at—

—dabi knows damn well how dangerous he is. he’s got to - it’s how he got where he is now, measuring his skill against what he’s got left to learn, against the competition that’ll come for ‘im as he makes a name for himself. consciously & unconsciously, that leads to him placing himself in a position where he can directly oppose whatever might try to fuck up this thing he’s got here, with u.he’s good w/ direct shit. also p good with sneaky shit. if ur a soft lil civilian or otherwise of lesser skill (or equal. or more, really - he’ll lay off some then, but still)- then he’ll want to know where ur at so he can bear in mind the angles if a threat pops up.        so. a hand on ur ass. hey- we can mix business w/ pleasure a lil.

             shhh. it’s totes just cuz he’s an ass man, tho.

straight up cuddling in bed, lazily soothed… all day every day pls and thnx. just hazy dozing, a dream-like quality to simple vulnerability shred. that’s not workable at present, but a worthy goal to set, no..? mmm.

EFFORT     flings, as stated, are for fun. he puts in the effort to be there bc he wants the good times, but it doesn’t go further than skindeep.

a real relationship - to dabi - is committed, and not something he’ll easily accept into his life. the point of one is effort; not in the least bc he knows it takes a fuckton of that for trust to really build. being who he is the way he is means it’s going to take effort.         mostly on his part, he thinks.     buuuuut also on the other part, if you’re not the patient or emotionally intelligent sort (which is fair honestly). 

dabi does not expect any true partner to do all the work. when it comes to effort in bonds, dabi goes … almost for broke, really. he’s neither antisocial nor aromantic, knows he craves emotional connection on several levels, and is therefore invested.                so, although he can be closed off (you may still not hear about w/e got him in this life etc), you can def just go up to him and go ‘okay i have xyz problem with us as we are, i need abc from you / do you need abc from me’. he’ll listen. he’ll try to see it your way too. this boy understands better than most what it really takes to make shit work with smn.

                  the most effort is trying to get him to a point where                   he wants to keep someone around, though. his                  agenda is his priority as is; romance just... well shit,                  you know this ain’t the time for that.

| twice; headcanons.

AFFECTION     at once highkey and lowkey. his anxiety nullifies any impulse to be all lovey dovey bc yeah. actually. that can get you killed. and losing you is high on his list of shit to avoid. so it’s all behind closed doors and there it’s desperate as you know he can be, all over each other, physical reassurance of both your connection and the fact your heart still beats.

starved of it, jin is always up for affection – yet can have too full a head to be able to deal with the extra impulses; physical touch, the emotion it evokes, what it does to his mind.

generally tight hugs, touchy-feely, wants to have his eyes on ur face to read u and check u over. prefers to have some kinda physical contact w/ u when ur together but his attention is away from you; the sensation of good things slipping through his fingers gets intense.

CUDDLING     yes please. jin can actually sleep in the same bed as someone else with little to no problem; at worst he’ll jerk violently in his sleep/during a dream/if his body registers your touch as foreign, but it’s not a punch or shit just an involuntary jolt.

embraces are his fave. full on arms around each other and pressed together. long, feelsy hugs that are all about just. well. affection. feeling each other. finding some peace in the hug and letting it last. 

jin is susceptible to ridicule (from stupid macho morons) but resolved about dem long hugs and sweet, tender love that isn’t afraid to be vulnerable. that’s what his cuddling feels like, always intimate. it can get a bit much to be constantly intimate to that extent, but then he rarely slips up about showing just how much he cares about you in public - so that’s a break from that lmao.

EFFORT     a lot. lots of internal shit, working on new anxieties. trying to ween himself off needing to feel you, to tone down the cling. it takes a few months for him to fully be ready to take this new flaring anxiety in his hands and deal with it like the (at least partially) solvable problem it is, and that’s when he starts toning it down, reassuring himself about the lack of touch, etc.         he’s an anxiety veteran. new causes can be so overwhelming that he doesn’t remember for a while that it’s his brain funking around.

he cares about you / what you’re feeling / needs & wants. might not be able to help, but will fucking care. if there’s one thing you won’t feel, it’s unappreciated. 

twice is a lil more aware of healthy functioning relationship dynamics than some of the other league members, and unlike say dabi he’s really intent on keeping you around. if he’s got something good he’s going to do what he can to keep it.

[caiuscassiuss]

Cohabitation (Opposites Attract AU! WinWin)

"i thought my roommate was murdered but i actually ended up dating him lol”

Description: an early bird and a night owl learn to co-habitate

masterlist || request

bulletpoint scenario

_______________________________________________________________________

the first thing you woke up to was Brahms’ Hungarian Dance in no.5

you looked at the time on ur phone; 5:30 AM

bitch fucking ass

you were very irritated, obviously, from being woken up way to early by your roommates classical music

Your roommate, Dong Sicheng, was a classical music major who loved chopin and apparently loved to be the bain of your existence by waking up 5:30 every fucking morning

how, you ask, did this happen?

STORY TIME

yeah it was the typical “i need an apartment, i see a cheap one near campus” college deal

you found the leasing through Johnny, you highschool friend, who said the cute chinese transfer student from shanghai needed a roommate

you were “okay, sure” but when you saw the rent price you quickly dialed him up because!!!! it was hella cheap!!! and you were broke as fuck!!!

you talked over the phone with the guy and he seemed nice enough and his slight accent was making you inwardly squeal at it’s cuteness

however, his early bird tendencies were not making you squeal in joy

his daily routine might’ve been fine for the average joe but you were a night owl who loved to sleep in late

Night Owl + Early Bird + Same Living Space = DISASTER

at first you just dealt with it

maybe he had an early class or something?

but as time went on you slowly grew more irritated

he woke you up early so when you went back to sleep, you ended up tossing and turning for 2 hours until getting up for class

and when you arrived in class, you were fatigued as hell

so you kind of um

decided to take vengeance

you decided that if he was allowed to play his goddamned conciertos you were allowed to turn on your trap music

at midnight

because you were a petty hoe okay

and you were afraid of confrontation so you decided little passive aggressive things would irk him in retaliation for your uncalled for early morning wakeups

this had been going on for weeks at this point, and it both resulted in you having eyebags the size of your college textbooks (and those are pretty large okay)

ye back to PRESENT DAY

you fumed quietly and ripped your bedsheets off

you stomped across the cold wood floors and flung open the door to the living area

“Sicheng!”

the tall boy turned around from the stove, dressed in a sweatshirt and jogging pants

“what?”

“can you turn off whatever violin shit this is? or at least turn down the volume?” you pouted and crossed your arms

he usually wide eyes narrowed and he put down his spatula

“I’ll do it whenever you turn off your shitty rap music at like 1 in the morning” he spat out and he, too, crossed his arms

you pursed your lips

rap music somehow made you understand international policy better, okay? and you just happened to study better late at night

it wasn’t your fault he couldn’t understand the blessed flow of Biggie

“the hell? it’s art, you moron-“

“more like trash”

“- and I’m not the one waking up with the fucking chickens in the morning!”

you two glared at each other

perhaps it was early morning grumpiness or a built up grudge or a combination of both both but you decided this had gone long enough

Winwin’s pretty face and broad shoulders weren’t going to save him this time!!1!11

“okay you know what? this has gone long enough. turn off the fucking stove and we are going to discuss this like the mature adults we are”

you stomped over to the counter and sat down on one of the stools and he turned off the stove flame

he, too, sat down in front of you

“this is clearly not working out and i think it’s safe to say that neither of us are going to move out” he drawled

“correct! 10 points to sicheng!” you sarcastically crowed

“for fuck’s sake shut up and at least try to be nice? i’m trying, okay!”

“fine” you pouted and rested your head on your palms

“i think we need to come up with a system before we start failing our classes- actually, just you, because I am stellar-“

“Winwin you better shut your ass up and get on with it” you narrowed your eyes at the boy

he rolled his eyes and stared straight at you

“lemme think”

you sat in silence for a few tense seconds as you both tried to think of something that could work

suddenly an idea popped into your head

“why don’t we just… turn down the volume of our music?”

DING DING DING dumb and dumber have just appeared!!!

wow you couldn’t believe you had just thought of this

damn you really were stupid

“… fine.”

you beamed and cheered

“BUT!”

you deflated

“that solves only like 60% of the problem. you stay up until like 1 am and i can’t sleep when i know someone is awake.”

“well that’s something you have to compromise bud, because i can’t sleep when someone is getting ready at 5 in the morning” you deadpan

“i think we’re just going have to be quieter then, is that fine?” win win asked, pursing his plump lips

damn he still looked good in a hoodie and sweatpants while you probably just looked homeless

“yeah. that’s okay.”

the next few days were actually pretty damn good

you could actually sleep!

in fact, you actually felt like you weren’t dying everyday!

in the few times you saw sicheng, he, too, didn’t look like he had 3 kids and was going through a mid-life crisis

it was a great improvement all in all

and you didn’t feel like you had to move out anymore

however one night something… shifted

you had just got home from your part time job at the local convenience store and you saw the lamp in the living room turned on

strange, because win win always turned off all the lights when he went to sleep

wait… WAS SICHENG MURDERED????

this is some creepy home invasion shit isn’t

this bitch is out

jk jk this bitch is poor and would probs live with a serial killer if it meant cheap rent

okay a bit extreme but you get the point

you step out of your shoes and creep into the living room

however, instead of seeing a dead sicheng lying on the floor

you saw a very much alive sicheng sleeping on the couch

with a book accidentally lying on the floor

you couldn’t help but awww bc he was so cute and innocent like this

unlike the snarky sicheng you often encountered

you decided to get a blanket from your room and layed it on top of him and adjusted his head so he wouldn’t have a stiff neck when he woke up

then you turned off the lamp and then went into your room to watch a vine compilation

next morning!!!

you woke up to a light drizzle outside your window

you then put on a sweatshirt and opened your door

you were suddenly assaulted by the smell of bacon

you frowned and saw on the counter of the kitchen was a plate of bacon and eggs with a cup of coffee next to it

there was no note or anything next to it but you knew it was from win win

mY uWuS aRe ExPlOdInG

the next few weeks these daily acts of kindness turned from unacknowledged to you two getting closer together

when you would come home late and happened to catch winwin reading, you two would sit on the couch and talk about your day and your favorite pieces of literature

when he would cook you breakfast he sometimes stayed and chatted with you at the counter about mutual friends and stuff like that

sicheng turned out not to be an asshole, as you initially thought 

he actually was pretty sweet and nice

he also loved harry potter, which probably earned him a gazillion brownie points in your book

soon enough casual goodbyes turned into hugs

living room talks turned into cafe hang outs

a snarky jabs turned into playful banter

your friends started to wonder if you two were dating

especially johnny, you always raised an eyebrow when you and sicheng would hug goodbye

sadly, you were not, but you kind’ve... wanted to?

he was basically the perfect boyfriend

yeah he had shitty taste in music and you hated how put together he was, but sicheng was a genuinely great guy

however, the more you pined over him, the more you realized how unattainable he was 

girls would always gather in a group in the university courtyard when he passed by and you heard he was number 1 in his class

unlike you, who was doing pretty average and the only things you attracted was lint

one day you two were walking through the uni grounds, a cup of coffee in both of your hands from the cafe down the street

“uh, y/n... i got something to tell you.” sicheng whispered

you looked up at him

“what?”

he smiled down at you and booped your nose

“hey! what was that for?” you shouted and crossed your arms

“ur just so cute!” he said and pinched your cheeks

you slapped his hands away and you both laughed

“no, but for real, what did you want to say to me?” you asked while resting your head on the side of his arm

he was silent for a few moments until he led you to a bench

you two sat side by side, him looking off into the distance and you utterly confused as fuck

wait shit waS HE GOING TO MOVE OUT????

alarm bells started whirring inside your head as your thoughts raced

“y/n, you have really shitty music taste and are utterly disorganized as hell...” he started off

what the fuck

“... but i really like you and i want you to be my girlfriend.” 

“wait so you aren’t moving out???” you blurted out

winwin gives you a funny look

“no? y/n i just fucking confessed to you, does it look like im moving out?” 

“i don’t know!” 

you were flustered as hell because sicheng??? confessing??? to you???what a mindfuck

winwin gives another look

“Well?”

“oh yeah, i really like you alot too, and i, uh, would love to be your girlfriend” you somehow managed to get out, and looked down to your coffee cup, which was clenched tightly in your hands

“great” and he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer

he kissed the top of your head as you settled into his chest

Bonus

“you two?? are together???” johnny asked, clearly confused as hell at this recent development

“yeah?” you glanced at winwin and he just smiled and squeezed your intertwined hands tighter

“holy shit i can’t believe this happened! y/n... you’re like the latest night owl i know and winwin! you’re like... the earliest early bird on the whole fucking campus!” johnny threw his hands up, nearly tossing his phone also

“and?” sicheng asked

“that just... doesn’t add up!” your mutual friend sputtered

“okay then what are you? night owl or early bird?” you asked

johnny finally seemed to snap out his daze and adapted a solemn look on his face

“i am not an early bird nor a night owl.”

“I am some form of permanently exhausted pigeon.”

[flcwerstudies]

cute tag!

pretty long post coming up!! Thanks to @cafedetude for tagging me!! im tagging: @hermiionegrcnger​ @studying-frenzy​ @belledoe​ @tiny-notes​ @theteadesk​ !! You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to ofc and if u want to do it and i haven’t tagged you go ahead!! 

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? there must always be more milk than cereal, but that amount must not exceed a certain amount do you get me? when i scoop my cereal there has to be proportionate amounts of milk in each scoop, consistently, until i have finished my bowl. my mind is a strange and lonely place. 

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? yes! its so refreshing and i feel like all your lethargy just evaporates... i love taking walks in the winter around my neighborhood in the evenings.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? spoons, lipsticks, i once used another book to bookmark a book, hair elastic, my contact lenses case, compact mirror....im a mess, i know 

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? tea: scalding hot with lots of sugar and some milk. coffee: lots of milk, so much sugar 

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? no? i just want my braces off!!

6: do you keep plants? yess

7: do you name your plants? yes! i am currently growing two wild roses and I’ve named them Calliope and Polymnia. 

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? journaling, writing, reenacting musicals and dramatic renditions of songs? 

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? yeah ofccc it keeps me sane 

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? back and side 

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? CAROL THE LESBIAN LIBRARIAN // mary walks by // too many to list here tbh 

12: what’s your favorite planet? mars! and also venus 

13: what’s something that made you smile today? my friends 

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? a hurricane flew thru the entire place, empty wine bottles on the ground, beanbag chairs, stacks of books and movies, maybe a cat and a dog lazing around on the couch 

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! there’s a gigantic cloud of alcohol wayyyyy out in outer space that could produce over 450 trillion pints of beer 

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? give me all the pasta. i love all pastas. 

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? im ok with my hair color now 

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. GETTING A CAPUCHIN MONKEY AS MY PATRONUS ON POTTERMORE

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? yes! i rant a lot and i sort of write down reflections? on my day and things. its really emo and angsty lmao im 16 pls 

20: what’s your favorite eye color? brown eyes. so gentle. so sharp. so kind but so cruel. so ambiguous! 

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. my tote bag from myanmar! the straps are falling off but i love it so much 

22: are you a morning person? depends on if i slept early enough 

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? sleep, watch a movie, watch youtube, read 

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? absolutely not. it always pisses me off when people are like ohhh you can tell me anything??? no i can’t???? 

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? my friend’s house lmao 

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? my peach converse! they’re so pastel and they seem weird but converse generally go well with a lot of things 

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? i don’t like gum tbh 

28: sunrise or sunset? both 

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? sticks his tongue out when he’s concentrating and its so cute i die everytime 

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes but i will never ever go into detail with anyone about this lmao 

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. i love socks, i like wearing weird socks except for toe socks, people who sleep with socks on are Immune to Heat and Not Afraid Of Dying?? no white socks get nasty real quick and they’re so bland, i love socks i have this grey pair with french bulldog faces allllll over it and i wear them all the time and even though people can’t see them i still get happy and tell people about my dog socks. 

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. HA LMAO we had just watched a scary movie so obviously we turned on my little pony and watched that for two hours 

33: what’s your fave pastry? cupcakes! anything tbh i have an enormous sweet tooth 

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? my dad used to go on a lot of business trips and he came back once with a huge stuffed bear from switzerland and its so fuzzy its still on my bed. it’s name is Fred and it wears overalls and it has brown fur! 

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? yes to all!!

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? paul anka lmao he’s not a band but ya know 

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? clean

38: tell us about your pet peeves! wHEN UR JAMMING OUT TO MUSIC AND THEN SPOTIFY JUST STOPS WORKING?? people asking me if im mad when im just being quiet and then making me mad by continually questionning me, people who will ask dumb questions (yes, there are always dumb questions. google is free and im not going to tell u the homework, it’s written on the board quite clearly u moron), racist/homophobic/ableist/ generally offensive and disrespectful people 

39: what color do you wear the most? grey and navy 

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I have mismatching earrings that my grandmother got me for my birthday! 

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? Fifteen Dogs by Andre Alexis! 

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! the starbucks on center street it’s very Starbucks, exactly what you would expect, but I always sit in the corner spot near the windows 

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? My family! 

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? sitting in the sand in shell key, florida. my feet are in the water and i am watching my family swimming. I am very sunburnt but my mind is completely blank in a good way 

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? absolutely 

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. ofc they used a baby lion as their mascot. it’s simba-lic. 

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? there’s this food in korea that’s just stir fried rice with soybean sprouts and the sprouts..... aw god....they refuse to be bitten in half and it’s so gross i hate it sm 

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? darkness! and no it is different today!

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? there are scarce places to buy CD’s now but the last one I bought was Micheal Jackson’s Bad 

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? bottle caps and paperclips and also pens i pick off the ground 

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? my dad. any aretha franklin song 

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? the spongebob one and the gif of the white man who blinks a lot....u know the one 

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? i loved all of them and i want to be able to quote them in all of my speech but i dont think people have watched all of them 

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?  i was working on homework last night and when i was turning on my laptop to work on my project i met my reflection in the screen 

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? been incredibly bitchy like damn.....i surprise myself and i really hate it 

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? when people use weird shit as bookmarks, when they laugh with their eyes shut, laugh lines near their eyes, dimples, kindness, when they aren’t afraid of making eye contact with me bc i have weirdly intense eyes  

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? it did not fit the mood of my day but yes i did reenact the lyrics 

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? my friend diana is the wine mom but i am the vodka aunt. why?? she is infinitely more caring and kind and sophisticated and also wine gets u lowkey, calm drunk, while i, the vodka aunt, am caring, but i have a bit of a laissez faire attitude and go with the flow and ‘damn what the hell fuck it’ kinda vibe and vodka gets u sloppy shitfaced drunk with none of the sophistication that comes with wine. 

59: what’s your favorite myth? icarus

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? i dont LOVE poetry but i like haikus they’re like clever one liners ha 

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I gave my friend a notebook that i’d hastily made the night before and I have received a box of pads which in retrospect is not even a stupid present bc pads are expensive 

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? i drink oj when i can 

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? i organize them every month bc i am ridiculous and i can’t function if my bookshelf is weirdly organized 

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? pale grey almost white.

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? my oldest group of friends (TNT lmaoooo) OR YOU KNOW callixtus from volunteering holyyy. you know those people who u meet and u immediately click with?? he’s on of them magical people and he was hella funny too i miss that guy to all hell 

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? small roses! peach blossoms and cherry blossoms too. one huge ass hibiscus or lotus flower as a statement piece 

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? cozy and sheltered. valid excuse for not going out 

68: what’s winter like where you live? terrible but i love it kinda 

69: what are your favorite board games? monopoly 

70: have you ever used a ouija board? NO WHAT 

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? barley, green or reallllyyyy black tea with loootss of sugar so that it makes your teeth ache 

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yeah how’d you know 

73: what are some of your worst habits? expecting everyone to be on the same page 

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. dedicated and brash, loud and hilarious, soft, amazing, i love them a lot 

75: tell us about your pets! i dont have pets!! T-T  

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? studying BUT DONT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS OK

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink 

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? hateclub sorry 

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? done my makeup for me while gossiping with me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? pale green and yeah i did. i chose it bc i love green! and the old color was boring and i didn’t like it  

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. no edges at all, soft bovine eyes , shaking leaves, crocodile tears 

82: are/were you good in school? yes! it’s a source of a lot of pride for me! 

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? amsterdam by nothing but thieves omg 

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? oohh nahh im not planning on getting tattoos im scared of needles 

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? through the woods? i used to read a lot of them but you know i grew out of them 

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? not especially no 

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? the drop, double indemnity, back to the future, idk there’s a lot 

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? the rennaissance! it was so extra and i loved it a lot 

89: are you close to your parents? yeah

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. TORONTO-soaring skyline from the highways at night near the lakeshore, the lights from the condos are like stars and its ridiculous but i also loooooveee dubrovnik in croatia and hanoi in vietnam and kaunas in lithuania and kyoto in japan.....in dubrovnik the wind blows in from the shore and at night when the lights are on in the walled city the stone glows amber. In Hanoi in the old quarter, motorbikes flash by and there’s yelling and the smell of pork skewers and there’s old buildings and new ones, huge stalks of bamboo leaning up against the walls. In Kaunas the wind is so cold and sharp and the buildings are so clean and there’s that old fortress and the tower! it’s so beautiful. and Kyoto is old and archaic but so modern it hurts and the streets are too uniform and the houses creep me out a bit bc they’re so quiet. 

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? i dont think so 

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? i will bury my pasta in cheese just you watch 

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? my hair is one style fits all bc its short 

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my friend!

95: what are your plans for this weekend? study and work on projects and homework and stress and nap and have dinner with a guest 

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? no updates. we die like men. 

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? isfj-t, aries, ravenclaw 

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? sometime in september? it was nice! 

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. put your head on my shoulder by paul anka....there’s a lot and im really lazy sorry 

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years in the future, just to see where I end up 

[koohiss]

30 years since the last critically acclaimed movie, but only like, 50 or 10 since the last one, depending on how time works, skywalkers are fucking shit up in the galaxy once more...

Luke’s gone, Leia’s still a badass, the heavy metal empire has been replaced with the emo-lite first order, just as much nazi garbage and none of the impressive capes. Instead they have a giant toddler who stomps around and eats shit on a regular basis and jerks off to his grandpa’s dead face, probably. Fucking weeb. This pilot, Poe, who I honestly don’t feel much of a connection to, sorry, is trying to get this old man to give him a map to Luke so he can come kick ass. But the douchelord Kellog’s Frosted Fuckup shows up and shoots everyone, bc uncle issues or something. poe gets captured, but shoves the map into his magic 8 ball, which escapes and finds a random superhuman jedi lady of amazingly ironic ancestry in the middle of, you guessed it, a desert. She’s Rey, and to quote some ghost guy who once got gutted inside a palace’s weird power dungeon murder hole, she’s probably maybe might be the chosen one for real this time, I swear to the force it’s for real this time yoda. Then, this amazeballs stormtrooper, Finn, has morals and courage and heart and all the things they wanted in wizard of oz, and is like, fuck this nazi shit, I’m out, and helps poe escape. Sadly, they crash, and poe apparently dies but really leaves finn to die in a plothole of a scene that someone in the writers room should be really embarassed over. Finn meets rey, and it’s love at first “oh shit”. It’s all meet cute/meet thief for a second, and then shit starts blowing up sideways, there was hand holding and running and “follow me”s and then the girl in white and the guy with the leather jacket get on the falcon and leave the desert planet. Classic. Speaking of classic, being the collector’s machinery that she is, the falcon breaks down and they get caught in a tractor beam of a larger ship, which conveniently Han and Chewie are on. Two gangs show up, the giant squid-tribbles escape, scooby doo mayhem ensues. They get away in the falcon and nope the fuck out. Spooky the gollum wannabe teases Kyle about Han and he acts like a pissbaby, says it’s nothing. Oh, and I guess he surprises everyone because somehow this giant moronic imbecile incompetent failure came from the pure glorious happy love of han and leia. Fuck you jar jar abrams. Fuck you in the eye. With a lensflare. This bullshit. The gang checks the map and realize it’s borked, Han gives the lowdown on “it’s real” and also that some sick asswipe death-murdered the jedi like some moron trilby with anger management issues because his mom cancelled his xbox live account because he wasn’t getting good enough grades at jedi academy due to playing the sith campaign of some shitty remade SW game with a pretty decent plot that every teen boy over analyzes and gets the wrong take away from. Anyways, they go to Takodana and Maz’s epic castle that was never fully explained. For some reason they need her to find the resistance for them, which I’m like, just have Han wave at a holocam for like, 2 seconds and you will find literally almost everyone except luke because he’s pouting over history repeating itself. So naturally while they are all chilling at the castle, the party splits bc Finn is scared and Rey is gonna go home and Han is just like, eyes roll emoji. Who knows where chewie went, they act like he isn’t a character or something. But twist, the big ol space nazis find them. Rey finds a lightsaber (prolly just a family heirloom or smth, nbd) and bolts after having visions of all these epics ass movies and shit. My beloved young padawan super duper force sensitive jedi in training Finn is given the lightsaber, bc even Maz can tell that those two are always gonna watch out for each other and are obvs soulmates and he’s the best bet to get it to Rey, the inheriting granddaughter. (also, didn’t a bunch of little kids get murdered with that at least once, possibly twice???) As they leave, death star 3 and with a much lamer name but really cool lore blows the everloving shit out of coruscant 2.0, killing a few more characters that I was probably more interested in than Kyle’s boring weepy “my parents dont’ accept me for being an edgelord” lame ass backstory. Then the TIE fighters try to wreck my fave dudes with some weak sauce army, but then that same ace pilot who apparently left finn to fucking die, nbd, true love amirite? brings the party to them in an epic callback with improved graphics. Meanwhile, that boring infant Ronald mcdumbass over here shows up and after a let down of a fight (c’mon rey, shoot him!) kidnaps his cousin. Gets all creepy and makes teenagers with poor romance comprehension (not their fault, imo) think it’s love and come up with all this bullshit as to why they aren’t cousins. Sigh. But Rey, light of my life, is stronger than this woobie weeb, and she makes him have to run back to the safety of his darth vader body pillow, while she up and obi wans her way out of this bitch. The theme-swapped leto-joker looking vastly subpar offbrand trashcan may have padme’s hair, but rey has her climb up random shit abilities, which go a lot farther honestly. (they both have her hit and miss fashion taste so at least there’s that in common you goddamned r/los that’s all i will give you) Mr. Hotshot takes everyone back to Resistance HQ and conveniently brings the drama too, since he followed teeny!leias footsteps and lead a superweapon to the not-so-secret-anymore base. Everyone scrambles, finn kinda sorta maybe lies through his teeth a little so he can rescue rey, leia guilts han because apparently no (coughdudecough) director can write a conflicted and damaged woman who also happens to be strong without making her completely subsume to whichever half of the dichotomy is needed for the current scene… They go to death star 3 and prepare to fuck shit up. Specifically by doing things that have never been done before with no guarantee they will survive and sassing each other mercilessly. My babies. They find rey off being her badass self, and then right at the point where everything has to go to shit to make the third act interesting, some motherfucking emo up and kills my geriatric fave. Fuck you, marilyn manson. Fuck you. Chewie takes the logical next step and blows his fucking guts out with a laser crossbow bolt, AND blows the fucking guts out of his fanboy cosplay of the death star, because fuck you that’s why. So that’s how the dramatic “ur up past curfew” conversation goes, because I can never have nice things, no the precious goth boy has to live, apparently my needs aren’t important to multi-trillion dollar entertainment corporations, whatever. The absolute wrench fucker chases my beautiful darlings around the currently imploding fucking doom orb of stupid, and they waste his ass with amazing shows of jedi prowess. Finn fights him first and the bastard cheats with his fucking laser butterfly knife like an ass, and precious finn who has never trained a day in his life for this bullshit can only hold on so long before the cheating bastard takes him down. Then rey, pillar of light and all that is good, curbstomps his ass with the prowling predator walk of her father and grandfather before her. Suck it, ron. She’s the chosen one, bitch. Anyways, so I guess the bombs let fly boy (only) get inside and pew pew up the place enough that it rejoined it’s godforsaken stop-building-death-moons-they-don-t-work ancestors. Old ghastly jazzhands on the demon projector asks the weasley kid to go pick up kyle’s raggedy strung out ass, like I fucking care at this point. Everybody goes home (AKA chewie saves all of your asses because even if you ignore him he’s still a cool dude like that) and they totally gloss over the deaths of characters I care about to give us this arbitrary fucking scene of the golden cock block and ir3cutesty5u the soccerball annoying r2, who magically wakes up and magically doesn’t nuke their inferior asses and instead gives them the stupid fucking map, why do you even need a fucking map, all you need is coordinates, jesus christ it’s space, you can just plug the fucking three axis code into the computer and float ur ass over why is there a goddamn treasure map to safeway just use the damn gps good god. It’s space. With infinite wifi. Rey and chewie go to this bird shit covered island and find luke sulking, probably about getting bird shit on his suede jedi boots or losing his best friend and failing his nephew and sister and and the entire galaxy or something like that and then the movie ends

[survivorindia]

Disturbing Patrons with my Mental Breakdown- Kendall (Episode 8)

Okay, soooo. I'm pretty sure all of the returnees threw the challenge RIGHT OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW in order to vote out the minority newbies... Aka me.... So, I'm pretty pissed off as it's evident that I'm the only one who actually TRIED at this challenge, when I clearly shouldn't have because I'm extremely sick with strep and should be sleeping all day. SOOO, that was a huge waste of my time and I'm pretty pissed about it... But it's fine, bitches. Satan will see you in hell <3 :*

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD WE JUST THREW THE CHALLENGE. I have never thrown a challenge before and that was terrifying. If this backfires on me i'm gonna look like a moron but I have good faith. Hopefully bye bye Ruben, Worst case scenario bye bye Casey, Worst-Worst case scenario bye bye allies, and Worst-Worst-Worst case scenario bye bye Jordan

i definitely picked my tribe with the intention of screwing someone over. i think things have revealed themselves nicely on where loyalties still lie, and while one or two people might think they're in the driver's seat, i'm in a good position to shift the gears without them noticing. and that means their car will crash and we all die. hehe.  i'm prepared to make a move if we lose immunity, but im not letting that happen. i want to win this one just so i can be safe one more round. figure things out a little more. let tea spill. but i'm not going to let myself make the same mistakes and spill my guts to anyone willing to listen. i'll keep information to myself. i know i'm on the bottom of the returnees alliance and probably the newbies one, too. but i'm content for right now, because ultimately the returnees will start to fall. we'll be picked off one by one. dom wants to throw immunity, and sometimes its not a bad idea to do that, but this round, it needs to not happen. ruben will likely go home but i dont think he trusted me in the first place, so it's his time. sorry.

i'll take his position if he does. lexi needs a #2 and its between robin and myself. i respect robin bc they were there for me when i had no one else there for me. i feel like i've known them for years, but we just met and thats powerful. i have a powerful bond to this person. they're important to me. but this is also a game and i know my competition when i see it. if they have to go at my expense of making it another day, i'll do it.  idk if im still a villain or if im becoming a hero. i think that's up for determination. 

LOOOL WILD TRIBAL. BUH-BYE, JULIA. GLAD I DIDN'T SEE YOU AHAHAHAAAAA

This is oh so sweet. If everything goes well, bye bye, Ruben! This one's for Johnny.

Can i just say........ HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA FUCK YOU JAIDEN FUCK YOU DOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY FUCK SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE JULIA LEFT. Lets get down to brief overview and how i feel about it  1) Julia gets voted off.....SO MAD 2) Alex, Dom, Jaiden are in clear alliance of three, split the tribes up so everyones pair is separated...so basically...jordan and I are gone, casey and ash, ruben and lexi ...u get the point. 3) They put me on a tribe to fuck me over...im gone when they make these tribes and I come back to the ugliest tribe ever. Jaiden. Robin. Dom. Lexi. Alexis. Ashley and I. Now Ash and I are just sitting there like.................................i – i- this plan is so obvious??!?!? and do those three boys think its not obvious their together and they did this on purpose to FUCK ME OVER!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??! um why u so obsessed with me BACK OFF 4) Ashley calls me at work during the comp and TELLS ME DOM IS TRYING TO THROW THE COMPITITION..................to say that the reason hes doing that is to save casey....thats right CASEY. YA RIGHT DOM FUCK OFF WHO DO U THINK WE ARE..........................now lets talk about this because ...................bitch u really want to try me!?! I know those three boys arent as stupid as their moves are coming off!?!? but do they think this is believable!?!?!? Seriously? Im kinda confused because a) They vote julia equalling in jordan and i coming full force on them.....like if ur gonna go for the two headed snake ....dont go for its tail? Sorry but julia was just a number. Jordan and I are the ones who game talk together and as much as i hate playing with him...i love playing with him if that makes any sense. b) you want to throw a competition...to what? To get me out? um....do you underestimate jordan , kendall and I? Yea were on two different tribes but its clearly obvious im fucked over. As if they wouldnt throw this comp.  5) We win immunity....and you would think the way ppl were acting was as if we lost. But it was so obvious everyone of them threw that and im PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [7:00:19 PM] jaiden: that's fucking bullshit [7:00:24 PM] jaiden: I went back and CORRECTED myself [7:00:26 PM] jaiden: i'm pissed [7:00:36 PM] jaiden: I'm glad we won but FUCK. THAT. [7:09:57 PM] Sarah: ARENT U HA;PPPYYY [7:10:00 PM] Sarah: YUHJGEDSXF [7:10:08 PM] jaiden: that would've been sooooooo bad sarah [7:10:19 PM] jaiden: I would've felt like SHIT if we had to go to tribal all because I made a simple mistake ............Jaiden................You had the lowest score on our tribe. And you think i didnt know I was going if we lost?.... “Simple mistake” mhm HUNTY I BELIEVE U FOR SURE Now its kinda obvious what dom is doing and honestly......................................fuck u wtf do u think ur doing being a better player than me? I cant wait till i vote ur ass out. Please take it as a compliment Actually...wait  no fuck u binch face motherfuck i hate u anyways so i was thinking that if we lost immunity ...i could come up with a plan. Jordan gives me the idol, it will be publicly shared, Jaiden will immediately come to me freaking out because hes being a fake ass, asking if jordan gave me the idol...I will tell him (in confidence HAHHAHAHAHAHA) that jordan gave me a fake one and that i only did it so people are scared to vote me out. He'll tell dom so they dont switch votes on Ashley. Then when I get majority votes ill idol out my votes, ashley puts one vote on me, i put one vote on dom so it ties. So if dom plays his idol it will be WASTED ANYWAYS. But if they split votes then ill be safe who cares if ashley goes home. Because im safe and in f13!!!!!!!!!! and hopefully merge happens soon so i can stop doing this. But its ok bc im gonna pray kendall and jordan throw the next comp. Honestly I love Kendall so much I want a f2 with her now that Julia is gone. So watch out for that in the future. http://i.imgur.com/D8kFHyf.gif DONT MESS WITH ME I WILL SELL MY SOUL JUST TO MAKE SURE I MAKE MERGE

Candle added Jordan Pines to this conversation.  From: Candle Jordan you know I adore you Sent on: 2:10 pm  From: Jordan Pines oh no Sent on: 2:10 pm  From: Candle But if you want to make a group chat, do it yourself Sent on: 2:10 pm From: Candle From: Jordan Pines hahahaha Sent on: 2:10 pm From: Jordan Pines this callout XDDDDDD Sent on: 2:10 pm  I couldn't have said that better myself Sent From: Candle Kay well I’ve made my point so get off my lawn you damn youngings Sent on: 2:11 pm Candle has removed Jordan Pines from this conversation Candle has removed Gavin from this conversation  AYYYYYYYE. YES. KENDALL. YES.

I hate getting lied to at Tribal Councils, but Julia left which is actually a good thing and kind of my fault oops. It's Kendall all over again in Malaysia. 

 But yeah, things got messy but I got to pick my tribe for the tribe swap. Jaiden and I got on call and decided we were going to split everyone up (Sarah/Jordan, Ruben/Lexi, Casey/Dom), so that's really fun and exciting. It'll be neat to see how everything goes with the pairs being split. Gavin and I are still together which is sweet. 

 I'm pissed about the vote count at Tribal. Jaiden ruined my no vote streak, but at least he did it on Day 87 for me not getting votes, which is my favorite number. 

I haven't been having fun in India and I never really knew why. It wasn't as though I was losing, it wasn't as though I was in any danger. I was just bored... it felt like something was missing, aside from my soul. So I had a heart to heart with myself over a cup of coffee. I went up to me and said "Me, what's wrong? I've been acting sadder then I usually am, what's wrong egg?" I simply gave myself a shrug and sadly responded "I dunno, I really want to have fun but something is missing... it feels like I am going through the motions," I gave myself a sad sigh. "Oh me, what am I going to with I? How am I going to win a game that I don't have the will to even play," It was at this time I was politely, but sternly, asked to leave by the Starbuck's Barista because I was "disturbing patrons with my mental breakdown," Which was bullshit by the way, I've had like 6 mental breakdown and they are not nearly as tame as me talking to myself. And so, as I argued with the barista and as threatened to call the cops, I had a realization. I have been experiencing the human emotion known as 'pouting'. I have given up because I felt like I had no opportunity to get to the end, that I was either going to get dragged as a goat or voted pre merge. But I have things I can use to my advantage. I don't have to lie down and play dead. If I just pretend to be a good little soldier until merge, reconvene with Sarah and some others, I could do something incredible. For now I just need to play nice. I have decided to stick with my allies. Not because I suddenly grew a brain. Not because I felt some sort of kinship with them or 'friendship'. It's just the best thing I can do Here is an elaboratation on my reasoning the form of a chart: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1qPAkC4IhbNWgE2II29QqNaQFR1rgckfBEK_yKCOat5A/edit?usp=sharing 

Oh right, I almost forgot to mention during my ego maniacal ramblings. We are going to probably through the challenge to save Sarah (For strictly strategic purposes... I promise). I say probably because nothing has been confirmed. TBH if we lose, even if it is unintentionally, I'm about 80% sure Jordan Pines will claim that he meant to do it. Welp that's a common side effect of working with a narcissist. What are you gonna do?

Okay so FUCK this tribe swap. I am literally stuck on a tribe of people I have like never even spoken to, that is my fault of course, but damn how did I get so unlucky? Jaiden says he chose me because I am good in challenges and that I am a nice person, I mean that is nice and all but I am now separated from Gavin, Jordan, Alex, literally anyone who I actually liked and was hoping to really get to work with. This counting challenge is also a goddamn mess. Dom has gotten us like -25,000 points already ON PURPOSE. He tells me he likes me and isn't coming after me, but that leaves only two other returnees on our tribe that he could go after; Jaiden and Sarah. Sarah is kind of certain that Jaiden and Dom are working together, which kind of goes against the whole "newbies vs. villains" thing they are trying to start. But who knows. I can only hope the guys on the other tribe will also try throwing some challenges to give Sarah and I a chance over here on this tribe. They don't want newbies to have majority either.

Jaiden picked me to be on his tribe so that was perfect because I really did not want to be on the other tribe. Lexi spoke to me a bit and let me know that Ruben talked highly of me and how she was fond of me for that reason Robin's nice Jaiden's cool and we've both wanted to be on the same tribe for quite a while now so that finally happened Ashley rarely ever speaks to me and forgets to reply constantly Sarah only now started talking to me a bit more since she believes she's in the minority and Jordan probably said she could flip me Dom is a bit suspicious at times but I believe he trusts me and that he wants to take the newbies far I lost it again last night after the results, I should have done my confessional then but everyone already assumes I'm already crazy so maybe we'll save that for later. I feel a bit more calm now but last night I wanted to request tribal and still do sort of but I don’t think it’s possible. I wish I threw the challenge since I hate when the other tribe gets what they want and I don’t want Ruben to go. I like this Lexi, Robin, Dom group going on so I am hoping to solidify that soon and I think they assume it’s newbies vs returnees still. I’m hoping that by some miracle, a returnee gets voted out and apparently Dom just handed Ruben an idol. I believe Jordan assumes I’m closest with him still and that’s why Sarah has been trying to talk to me more lmao! I like Jordan so we'll see where that goes but he's controlling a huge part of the game as of now. Sarah should have tried a bit earlier to speak to me because now it seems like desperation, but I’ll keep playing this middle role, it amuses me. Sarah said she only really talks to Ashley so that's nothing new since I assumed she was close with her from that returnee alliance before the swap. Here’s to hoping the next challenge is something easily thrown so we can finally say goodbye to Sarah or Ashley :)

That was honestly a messy challenge result. I don't necessarily blame anyone for throwing though. I didn't know I was in the negatives so I'm sure everyone probably made mistakes they didn't catch. I'm worried for Ruben. He's the only one from my old alliance on the other tribe. Dom gave him his idol though so he'll hopefully be safe. On another note, I've been talking to the other Lexi. To be honest, if started off because I confused her for lexi my ally. We're getting along pretty well. She's definitely someone I'd like to work with in the future. Jaiden's also pretty cool so I have my bases covered once we go to tribal