#because i've re-read these fics over and over again and they're the fics i come back to after a shitty day

[jolapeno]

the yearly round up

so, i am not someone who tends to toot their own horn a lot, but i thought i could be forgiven since it's my birthday. if there were a party, i'd maybe give a speech, right? so, instead of talking about myself, i thought id talk about my work and some of my fave things I've written this year and a little bit as to why. for this list, i have not included late night texts purely because i gave it a lot of love on my last secret birthday. and equally, as do me yourself comes to a close during this one, i feel it's having such a hot moment in the sun, i didn't want to bore everyone. also because if you ask me anything about dmy i won't shut the fuck up. to ask anything about these just add an 🍊.

anytime javier p x f!reader

best friends who go to a wedding only to realise they're in love? sounds like jo. this story fell out of me upon seeing a moodboard by /wildemaven and god i love them. i think about them so often and it makes me want to write him like this again. just fun, easy. it helped me find my nerve to tackle him again after a break when LNT finished, so it was nice to hang with him again.

in my room javier p x f!reader

this idea lived in my head for so long, it went through so many variations until we landed on this. i loved writing it because i hadn't written him like this, and how closed off they both were was so much fun. not having a resolved ending was tough to, but it was also really nice?

i like the way you frankie m x f!reader

would it even be a list if i don't include this? it's a work that on the surface might just feel like a lot of fun. and it is, for sure. but also this fic really taught me a lot and helped create a new relationship with sex. i won't bore or dwell on sad things, but even with therapy, a solid and healthy relationship, this fic helped heal some lasting wounds with my relationship with sex. all through the eyes of two friends who were just trying not to confess they loved one another. so very jo.

up sky, low high frankie m x f!reader

im not sure why this man makes me write some incredible smut (IMO, ofc) but he does??? this one wouldn't exist without @morallyinept urging me on, because honestly i wouldn't have had the guts without her convincing me. but, god i think about this fic a lot? i write a lot of lovely romance, but the romance in this with the smut? i never EVER thought id find that balance. and i did, have, yay!

be good, be you joel miller x f!reader

never in a million years did i think this would have been so popular. and that's not why it's on this list. it's on this list because i lived with this fic for weeks. every bit of rain the UK we had, i thought of this. anyone who knows me, knows how much i love bill + frank joel, so this was like giving into an idea that i thought would only live in my head. and now, it's there, and I'm not ashamed to say i re-read it a lot.

meet you once, saw you thrice lucien flores x f!reader

who'd have thought this would make this list? not me. but it has, and god. i really tested myself with this one. creating him was days of churning over interviews of other actors, of finding who he is in the centre of fucking nothing. and then pouring my heart into it for lovely @pedgito and god am i grateful that's the moodboard i was given. i was terrified (ali will attest) but now i am so proud of it. i love it, and him. I'm almost terrified now to see the movie and watch this version die and wilt hahaha.

din and the travelling of planets din djarin x f!reader

not a one shot, but a collection, because i spent longer trying to choose than i did dwelling on choosing the rest and writing this post. i never thought id step back into star wars, but i'm so glad i did. din and his girl, seeing different planets together, letting us see the world through her eyes. there's a lot of my writing I'm proud of, but I'm most proud of the lines in this. because i get to describe in a way where i don't feel its redundant. because we're seeing it at the same time as she is. i also have so much fun each time i get to write him, and that, makes me happy.

[trainsinanime]

Your favorite fanfic writer doesn't know (but would like to)

Let's talk about comments on fanfics. This is not meant as a guide or call to action, just a bit of observations. Personally, I always saw it as impolite to ask for reviews or kudos or comments or likes or reblogs or whatever. That's not a rational point of view, it just reflects how I am. And people actually telling others that they have to leave any of this feedback? I've blocked folks over that. In my mind that's not okay. I'm not announcing a change of that, this is not a policy, just some deep-seated mental issues, but I want to write down some more things that have been going through my mind, from the perspective of someone who occasionally writes fanfics. My previous suggestion in this regard was mostly to write some fanfic yourself and see what happens and what you'd like to happen, because it's genuinely fun and I think you probably have more to say than you realise.

But there's also another point here, and that is that your favourite fanfic writer has no idea that they are. If you're anything like me, then it will seem like the great writers in your fandom are obvious. Also, the last time you bought Blåhajs, it ended with you having to flee a smoke-filled subway tunnel. The great stories and great writers in your universe are facts of nature. You read a story and you think, "this is the greatest thing I've ever seen." A story rewires your brain chemistry forever. You keep coming back and reading that one fic whenever the mood hits you. It feels obvious that this story is great. How could it not be?

It feels trite to say that the author of that fic doesn't know that unless you tell them, but it's hard to really understand the feeling unless you've been there yourself. You write a story, but is it any good? Maybe you get a lot of kudos, or maybe very little, but what does either of that mean? Kudos can mean literally anything from "loved this" to "didn't close the tab in disgust". Maybe you just got unlucky. Maybe you just got lucky. What do these numbers mean? What is a good number of kudos? 1? 10? 100? 1000? Should I calculate ratios? How do I know whether people like this?

In light of this, a comment where someone just said, "I loved this", has an almost incalculable worth. A comment where someone says they read this over and over again, or quotes lines they loved, or something? You can't imagine how valuable that is. A while ago someone told me "a couple of us are talking about this on Discord, we love it and we keep repeating our favorite lines". I thanked them, but I was too polite to say, "really? What are they saying? Which are your favorite lines? How many people are there who love it? What are their names? Which lines are the favorite ones, please, tell me!". Part of me still regrets that, because I so desperately want to know! I don't think it was a public Discord and I never heard from the others on it, but just the idea that they're out there and they like my story was so powerful. (By the way, it's not on any account that's linked from here, please don't try to find that comment.)

Now, I firmly believe that you, as a reader, don't have to care about any of that. I know there are people who disagree with me on this point, very strongly in fact, but I don't think it's necessarily your job to care. It's great if you do, and I think a lot of you do in fact care, that's why I'm writing this. But if you haven't thought about that or don't feel comfortable leaving comments or whatever, that's fine, that's normal, and you are in fact part of the majority. Any well-adjusted fic author has found ways to deal with this. They have learned to love writing for its own sake, or they love re-reading their own fics, or they have a couple of trusted friends who like their work, or ideally all three. Personally I was scared of Discord for the longest time, but it really helps with that. One person who you sort of know going "hey that's neat" can outweigh just about anything else. (Still, there will be days when you post something and you won't get a response and that just plain sucks, no two ways about it.)

But if you do care, if you think it's important that a fanfic writer knows what they mean to you, not because of any concern about the wider unpaid fan creator economy but just because of the way their work affected you, then this is important. Your favorite fanfic writer probably doesn't know and/or believe that they're anyone's favorite, and even if they do, a reminder or learning that someone knew found them will make them incredibly happy. And obviously, all of that applies at least just as much to all the beginners with potential that are out there. So if you're wondering whether it's worth it leaving a comment that says how much you enjoyed something: It probably is. And if you shared this with others and they loved it, or if this is your favourite fic, or if you enjoy how original it is, or how well it does your favourite tropes, or anything like that, the writer is going to be so happy to hear that.

A final aside: This obviously applies even more when it's about fandoms, pairings, subject matter and in particular ratings that are considered a bit embarrassing. Writers who write stuff that, say, happens to be E-rated for whatever reason, doesn't matter, will probably get fewer kudos and comments just because people are embarrassed to have their names show up in the Kudos and Comment sections. If that's you, just a note that it is perfectly okay to comment anonymously, or to create a second separate account for leaving kudos on, commenting on and maybe even posting the somewhat more risqué stuff. Now I'm not saying I have one of these second accounts, at least I'm not saying that in public, but it is an option worth considering.

[felkithecreator]

Do you have revalink fic recs?

Oh do I ever. (Please don't take the numbers that I use too seriously, they're not to really judge the quality of work or anything it's just level of enjoyment for me and my particular tastes)

My favorite Revalink fic of all time is Pinesong by aperplexingpuzzle!! Honestly it's just an absolutely amazing work, and personally I think it's one of the greatest post-calamity Revalink stories written. Link and Revali bond on Vah Medoh after Revali's been freed and exists as a spirit, and while Link struggles through the rest of his adventure. Absolutely recommend, 10/10.

Finding Link by Umbreonix is another one I'd absolutely recommend. It's so silly and just - the characterization of Link and Revali is so fun. Link goes missing after the defeat of Calamity Ganon, and it's up to Revali to find him and potentially bring him back. Honestly Umbreonix's other Revalink work Beating about the bush is also phenomenal - that one's unfinished, but it's also great if you want to read something silly. It's a modernized/human version of Hyrule, which is super interesting as well. All That Glitters is hilarious as well. Recommend them all around 8.5/10.

Linger On by ICanFlyHigher is one I genuinely loved as well. It's been a while since I've read it, but I do know that the vivid descriptions of combat and fighting, and just - the immersion of it is so impressive. So I'd really really recommend this one. It's basically just Botw, but you're really put in Link shoes + that extra touch of Revalink. Again, haven't read it in a while, but 9/10 recommendation from what I remember.

I Lost Myself by self_indulgent_authorship is amazing as well. I love reading from Revali's perspective, and just - the take on Link and Revali getting to know each other after Link's lost his memory is so interesting and refreshing. I wouldn't recommend it if you don't like a bit of Zelda-bashing, but I think this fic handles it well and it didn't feel as if it were over the top or anything. 9/10 recommendation.

Snow filled days by SharkPinata is a great one if you're just down for a fun time!! The author kind of took a concept/idea and ran with it, and the plot grew later - and it shows, a bit, but honestly that's part of the fun with this fic. A great thing about it is you can also see the author's writing style improve over time as they write (I desperately hope that the same can be said about my fics too), so it's fun in that aspect of well. The concept is that Link isn't a knight, and just lives in Selkie's Spot in Hebra - where Revali regularly comes to visit him because they're each other's only friends. 7.5/10 recommendation.

Shades of Blue also by self_indulgent_authorship is just fucking amazing. It's the normal botw journey, but you get so much more intricate lore and flashbacks than the OG game - one where Link and Revali knew each other before they became champions - and it's so so so so good. I genuinely think it's one of the greatest Breath of the Wild fics out there, regardless of Revalink. 10/10 recommendation.

Come Morning Light by misscoconi is great as well!! I haven't read it in a long while but I do know it's one of my favorites. It's very sweet - and it's where Link and Revali begin a shared sleeping arrangement. (Meet Me Halfway is the sequel, also very good.) 10/10 recommendation.

The Longest Night by tirsynni is amazing. It's a relatively short fic, and it's unfinished, but it's still just - great. Trigger warning for some things, I'd definitely recommend reading the tags first, but like, I love. It's an interesting exploration of Link's psyche, and Revali's response to it. Honestly, anything by tirsynni tends to be amazing. 8/10 recommendation.

The Effect of the Illusion of Truth by GeryutheTzakandi!!! This is genuinely one of my favorite fics ever - it's so silly and funny and just an all-around good time. Small warning in that it's unfinished and hasn't updated since 2022, but like - I'd still give it a read because what is there is a fun time. It's a fic where Revali and Link decided to get married so that Link and Zelda don't have to. (And no, the two of them were not previously dating.) 10/10 recommendation.

(Another good one by GeryutheTzakandi is Deftly avoiding saying exactly what you mean - this one's hilarious, and Revali is surprisingly self-aware.)

Inertia by sincosma is a great exploration of how Link's amnesia affects the relationship between him and Revali - and what promises they made pre-Calamity. The memories are so interesting yet heart-breaking to read - but the happy ending makes it very much worth it. 9/10 recommendation.

A Seed of Song by Ginneke is adorable. I'm always a sucker for child fics/baby acquisition fics, especially if they're done well, and, well - this one is definitely done well. It's very cute - it's unfinished, but I still think it's worthwhile to read what's been written so far. The drama of Link not wanting to marry Princess Zelda is also very interesting. 7.5/10 recommendation.

Under the Stars by peterpiez is one of my favorites!! Honestly because it's one of the very few Revalink Linked Universe fics to exist. There's very little active Revalink, given most of it is just Link mourning and being retrospective in response to the lives and loves of the other Links, but I still really enjoyed. This is also unfinished, and I don't see the author ever updating it, but I still would recommend giving it a go.

The Last Song on the Wind by Inked_Jael is another incredible fic. There's so much worldbuilding, and insight to Link's thoughts, I just love this one so much. It's super interesting because it explores the politics and the different cultures of Hyrule. I know second-person style can sometimes throw people off, but I think it works really really well given the story - and also if you keep in mind that it's about Link, just... please read this. Their work needs more love. 10/10 recommendation.

a moment's respite by cottonmouthcandy is another one of my favorites. It's a bit of a sad read, because it's pre-calamity and you know what's coming for the champions in the future, but it's a story where you get to just enjoy with them their little vacation at the beach. It's just sweet, and nice. It's been a while since I've read it, though, so those are more just the vibes that I remember rather than the content of the story itself. 9/10 recommendation.

the wind through the flowers by HopeStoryteller is also just a silly, fun time. The boys go Modulga hunting. 7.5/10 recommendation.

I have more, and I would continue, but I kind of have a class in six hours and I need to sleep before then, so uh... yeah. I hope this satisfies you question!! But honestly please spread the love to these authors their works are just absolutely amazing.

[overtake]

Not to be weird but I feel like I got zapped when I read your hockey snippet, how didn't I know that this existed? It's literally been living my brain for hours and I've not been able to stop re-reading it since 🙃 clearly you can take the girl out of toronto but you can't take toronto out the girl because im a changed person now. No pressure ofc I mean this in non-prodding way but praying and willing you to put your snippets together. If you never come around to it then I'm glad (and changed) for what you've shared with world regardless 🙏🏻🙏🏻

This is SO sweet 🥹 I love you so much. Just for this, please have a bit more hockey au. There's a tiny snippet after a media bit (Surprise, this fic is multi-media! Writing the social media parts has been my fave part of the entire process)

@.MapleLeafs on TikTok: | December 12, 2023

[Players walk by a whiteboard on their way into the practice rink. They're stopped to answer the question written on it as they enter. The caption written over their heads reads: "Who don’t your Leafs want to sit next to on a flight?"]

ALEX ALBON: Easy one. Esteban Ocon. He’ll bite your head off if you make a single noise. I think he’d get mad if the plane was going down and you tried to warn him. LOGAN SARGEANT: Gasly or Ocon. I don’t know if it’s a French thing, but they both get really annoyed if you talk to them on a plane. PIERRE GASLY: Danny Ric. He is the loudest person I’ve ever met in my life. ESTEBAN OCON: Daniel Ricciardo. Sorry, Daniel. DANIEL RICCIARDO: Gasly. Max and I were just having a conversation and he rose up behind us and nearly bit our heads off for laughing. I don’t know why he keeps sitting near us. MAX VERSTAPPEN: I don’t really mind sitting next to anyone. I usually sit next to Daniel, and we have a good time. He keeps movies downloaded for us. They're often not very good, but that's sometimes more fun, you know? YUKI TSUNODA: Daniel. VALTERRI BOTTAS: Daniel Ricciardo. ZHOU GUANYU: Daniel. He is very nice and fun, but sometimes you just want to relax on a flight. MARCUS ERICCSON: Surely everyone except Max picked Daniel, right? FERNANDO ALONSO: I don’t want to sit next to anyone.

Mara (DR’s Reputation Era) @.mv33fan: Fernando Alonso: I hate this entire team The entire team: We hate Daniel and the French Max and Daniel: Ask again later. Our mouths are occupied with each other’s dicks.

________

Theoretically, Daniel knew that his and Max's pre-game ritual could end up on the broadcast. Butt taps and silly handshakes in the tunnel inevitably end up on team Instagram stories even if they don't air on TV. It was to be expected, particularly on a Saturday night game against Ottawa.

Still, he didn’t exactly expect a whole montage. It's a nice little package, to be fair. It shows him and Max laughing next to each other in the tunnels and locker rooms before games, followed by their fingers interlocking in their usual drawn-out high five. Daniel prefers to fist bump the whole team and exit only before the goalies, but his routine with Max is always a bit of a production that holds up the line. It's only a surprise it hasn't been uploaded sooner.

After a game where Max scored two goals and Daniel threw his body in front of a rogue deflection and stopped the Sens from a late-third tie, the media naturally focuses on the montage. God forbid they talk about actual fucking hockey in the hockey interview.

“We call it tangled love,” he tells reporters in the press scrum after the game. “In honour of our artistic collision last game.”

It wasn’t a real collision. They’d just got tangled up together when things got chippy by the net. Their skates had collided and they'd taken each other out while trying to defend Esteban from some Habs players. It was all over social media, though, and Daniel knew they’d end up in some embarrassing NHL moments compilation.

They’d both laid on the ice, a little stunned and a lot stupid, before Daniel let out a giant laugh and broke the tension. Max had risen to his feet and tried to pull up Daniel, only for them both to fall right back down as if this was the first time they'd ever skated.

They’d actually been doing this little handshake all season, but reporters were always happy for a soundbite to latch onto and a joke they’d never let go. There's not much to work with in this league in the way of on-camera personality, so it’d probably be a story for the next week. The go-karting clips of the two of them were so popular than even Max mentioned he’d seen them on Reels, and he’d carefully curated his feed to show him anything but Leafs content.

Daniel can’t explain it, this warmth that makes him feel like he’s glowing from inside out all the time since the season started, but he knows he feels it most when he sees people write his name alongside Max’s like their togetherness is a given.

[omar-rudeberg]

Hi Lili! I just wanted to say that I love your fics and I've re-read them multiple times each and they still feel just as special in a re-read as they do the first time around. Inside is no exception. It was so beautiful, loving, but heartbreaking and devastating at the same time (I even shed a tear – or five). It really feels like you just get Wilmon, you know?

And it got me wondering how you think their first time having sex once they're back together (for good now) would happen post episode 6. Like in terms of their feelings and would it be rushed or slow, etc. I'm just really curious about your thoughts on the matter :)

Thank you for sharing your beautiful words and thoughts (even in tags) with us 💜

hello my beautiful beautiful human bean what a love letter you've left me ?! hearing you like and are moved by and go back to my silly little words? wild. astounding. unbelievable. thank you for reading & thank you for coming here to tell me. ahhh 'get' wilmon !! is there any greater accomplishment !! i sure hope you keep feeling this way !!

i've been pondering your second question for so long and i've landed somewhere i hope you agree with...

(fuck me this got more detailed than i bargained for, here have a read more whoopsie daisy)

i have this gut feeling that the first time they have sex post-canon (wild that we can now call it that !!) is ... weird. different. i don't know i can't really explain it, but why i think so is that their intimacy has always been this like, almost homing beacon for their relationship you know? it's been a northern star, a sturdy monolith of everything they feel and need from the other that they can't put into words, a balm that soothes any rough edges that arise from the many many incompatibilities of their individual existences.

it's been tender and exploratory, sweet and gripping, urgent and learnèd and all-encompassing, but it's never been ... slow? it's never been particuarly awkward. they've never had time, really, because with the exception of maybe the fish scene, every time they've had sex has been either a hello or a desperate goodbye.

all this to say that i think the first time they find to have sex post-s6 - and for some reason i picture them in simon's room when they finally get there? can't explain it - i think they fall back into this pattern of urgency and desperation and desire, but then something stops this in it's tracks. honestly i have this vision so clear of like... one of them unable to get it up the first time they want to fuck post-canon hahaha and again i can't explain it but it's true !! in my head it's wille, maybe, and it's something akin to the way - have you ever had that thing happen where you get sick right as you take leave from work to go on a holiday or something? like your body realises you don't have to be switched on for weeks and decides to give you a head cold? something akin to that. wilhelm's adrenaline has run its course and his body's not working the way it did before, it's taking a break, now. finally.

so to finally finally answer your question i think they'll want it to be fast, and suave, and smooth and sexy and dirty and similar to like ep3, but they'll be forced instead into awkward. into slow. into soothing. i picture like, lots of kissing, slow deep kissing, and nuzzling, and grinding (lord, so much grinding), and breaths fanning hot over goose-pimpled skin. i picture them slowly talking, whispering, realising they have it now - t i m e - they have time, now. they don't even have to fuck (the whole shebang) tonight if they don't want to (they do, oh they do want to but they talk about how they don't have to). they spend a lot of time not fucking anyway, just being close and naked and together. i picture them both working wille over so slowly - so gently - finding out together what places on his body react to being kissed, what has his belly pulling tight and having his dick interested, finally. i picture simon being brought to the edge once - twice, maybe - before wilhelm's finally in any state to fuck him, and then god save simon when wilhelm actually does enter him he's so hard and so sensitive and so just as;dkfjas;ldkfj;lsad

okay fuck literally everything i'm so sorry and/or you're welcome? is this what you bargained for? asd;lfj;lsadkjf

(if you made it this far go to my request for prompts next please i think i've put you in the right mindset)

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

"Cut!"

Hi! I was remembering how some of your fics have Roman practicing conversations with the other sides in the Imagination over and over. Now, I tend to be one of those people that is almost always in my head (been mildly dissociating near constantly for almost a year now which uh- probably should get that checked out actually) and a lot of the time when I do stuff I get deja vu even if I've never done something like that before. And it's kinda gotten to the point where I'm not entirely sure if something has actually happened or not sometimes. So I was thinking maybe Roman references a conversation what he'd had with the Imagination!Sides in passing on accident, and everyone is kinda like "Princey wtf are you talking about??" And Roman panics and hides, and the next time he sees the sides he thinks that they don't wanna see him and this is a scene in the Imagination. So he gets really confused when the words he's learned will get the fake sides angry at him just are met with more concern and worry from the real sides. And they're trying to comfort him and he doesn't know what's going on and yells "CUT!" but obviously it doesn't work and now everyone is really worried and Roman can't tell between what's real and what's fake anymore and just. Has a mental breakdown. and then they comfort :D because I cannot leave this poor guy with an unhappy ending. – anon

hiii !!!! idk if you’re taking requests, and if not please ignore me, but if you are, i’m legit in love with how you write rociet with roman angst, and i would love to see more of it !!!!!! thank you !!!!!!!! – anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: unreality/roman having trouble remembering things and figuring out what's real, self-doubt

Pairings: dlampr, can be platonic or romantic you decide

Word Count: 4976

It begins so slowly that they don't think anything of it at first. Roman will say something that they don't remember, or he'll reference something that never happened, or he'll forget something that happened just a few days ago as though it happened several months back. Things...escalate, and soon they figure out the problem is far, far worse than they could have ever imagined.

Remus doesn't bother with asking or knocking, he just sinks into Roman's room right over his bed.

There's no yelp or screech, which means Roro's not in the bed, but he does get a surprised little squeak when he turns around from his desk.

"Ro-bro!"

"Re? I thought you were—you went—aren't you feeding Ollie right now?"

Remus frowns, sitting up. "No, that's not for another week. And you're supposed to come with me."

Roman furrows his brow, toying with his pen. "Really? I thought you said…"

He trails off, staring into nothing and Remus's frown deepens, sliding off the bed and walking over. Roman's pen stills, his grip a little too tight, and Remus nudges his shoulder. "Roro?"

It's like someone electrocuted him—Roman clicks and suddenly this wide grin that looks almost painful settles on his face and Remus blinks in surprise. "Sorry, don't know what came over me. Must've been lost in thought."

"Are you—hey!"

Roman leaps up and tackles Remus through the door into the Imagination, summoning his sword and swinging it before Remus has a chance to catch his breath. His morningstar clangs against the blade a moment later and he grins too—he's been waiting for Roman to start one of their fights for ages!

"Come on," Roman taunts, spreading his arms, "or are you just gonna lie there all day?"

"Oh, you asked for it, Roro."

Their sparring shakes the ground, yells and laughs ringing out as their weapons clash over and over and over. Remus throws back his head and howls and the Imagination responds, the sky growing dark and thick with clouds as thunder booms in the distance. Roman's sword grazes his arm and he shoves Remus hard in the chest, knocking him over.

"Do you yield?"

"Never!" He springs back up and they're off again, but Roman keeps dancing out of the way. "How're you so fast? Have you been practicing without me?"

Roman falters and Remus jams his elbow into the soft part of Roman's ribs, knocking him off-balance just enough to swat the sword from his hand. The first raindrops start to fall as Roman lands on his side, Remus's morningstar about to aim for his chest when a leg trips him and suddenly Roman's got his sword back—how did that happen?—and Remus's weapon is flying across the field.

"How the fuck—?"

"Do you yield?"

Remus snarls playfully and jumps up, tackling Roman and knocking his sword away again. Roman responds instantly, grappling across the slowly-muddying field until they end up on their backs, Roman's arm holding Remus in a chokehold as the rain pours down on them.

"Do you yield?"

"Yeah, yeah," Remus gasps, "I fucking yield. Leggo."

Roman chuckles and lets him roll off, landing face first in a mud puddle. His muscles ache but only in the good way and he flops onto his back, smiling breathlessly at the sky.

"That was fucking amazing, Roro," he gasps, "you have been practicing, haven't you?"

"Just trying to keep up with you," comes Roman's answer, just a little too quickly.

Remus doesn't think anything of it.

2.

"Roman?"

"Hm?" Roman looks up from his spot in the corner of the living room, curled around his notebook. "Oh, hey, Padre. Is everything okay?"

Patton tilts his head. "Yeah, kiddo, why wouldn't it be?"

"Sorry, it's just, you know, everyone's been a little tense recently, what with…" Roman makes a vague gesture. "Everything. I shouldn't have assumed, though, I'm sorry."

Before Patton can ask if Roman's okay, Roman's settling his notebook to the side and standing up.

"What can I do for you?"

"I was going to ask if you wanted to help me with dinner?"

An expression flickers across Roman's face, too quick to name, before he's smiling and bowing. "It would be my honor, lead the way."

At least he's alright enough for that. Patton goes over to the kitchen, Roman behind him, and reaches for the large pot at the back of the stove. "I was thinking we could try that new pasta dish that Virgil's been asking about? The one Thomas saw on that YouTube video?"

"The one with all the spices and garlic and stuff?"

"Yeah, that's the one."

"I don't remember if we have all the ingredients we need, but I'm definitely down to try." Roman opens a cabinet and starts taking bottles down from the shelf. "We can also definitely tweak the recipe to make sure that we can do the important parts, we just have to be careful that—"

"Uh, Roman?"

Roman pauses, turning to look over his shoulder, still holding a jar. "Yeah?"

"I, uh, I did this last week, I know what spices we have. I figured this out, you don't have to tell me how to do it."

Again, that expression flickers over his face and he quickly sets down the jar and takes a big step away from the counter. "Right, right, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that. I just wanted to—no, I'm not gonna make an excuse. I'm sorry, Patton, I'll listen."

"It's fine, kiddo, I know you didn't mean it." Patton holds out the pot. "Can you fill this with water?"

"Of course!"

They start prepping, Patton providing little instructions and Roman carrying them out. He chops the shallots, the green onions, and sets the sausage to the side to be cooked first. By the time they're ready to start the actual cooking, Patton's got the water boiling for the rice noodles when Roman looks over his shoulder.

"Um, what are you doing?"

"Cooking the noodles, that's it."

"But they're—sorry, aren't they supposed to be cooked later?"

"We need them ready to add to the rest of the stuff near the end, kiddo, so they have to be ready."

"But they only take a few minutes." When Patton frowns, just thinking Roman's words over, Roman hastily continues. "Sorry, I'm sure you know that already. Here, I'll, uh, would it be helpful if I got a bowl out to put them in once they're done?"

"Yeah, that'd be great."

He catches that expression on Roman's face again, and again it vanishes too quickly for him to ask about, but the rest of the cooking goes off without a hitch. They get a lot of compliments on how good everything tastes and Patton makes sure Roman gets as much of the praise as he does.

"I just listened to you," Roman demurs, "it's really all you."

"It seems not only have you cooked a spectacular dish," Logan observes, "but you've also taught Roman some humility."

Virgil snorts. "'Bout time."

Roman smiles as the rest of them laugh. Patton takes another bite. "This is even better than last time."

"Last time," Roman says quietly, "sorry, can you—when was last time?"

"Sheesh, Princey, how bad is your memory getting? It was just last week?"

"Last week, right."

Patton opens his mouth to ask why Roman still sounds unsure about it, but then Remus throws one of the prawn shells at Janus and he doesn't think about it anymore.

3.

"Easy, now," Roman murmurs, still stroking his hand up and down Virgil's spine, "that's it…you're doing really well, shadow-ling."

Virgil closes his eyes, resting against Roman's solid chest as the last of the panic attack bleeds from his veins. His breathing has yet to even out, but he can start to smell some of Princey's shampoo again, so he takes it as a win. He'll deny it later, but he turns his head to nuzzle into the crook of Roman's neck. Roman doesn't say a single thing, just shifting his grip to hold Virgil more securely in his lap.

"Hey," he says gently when Virgil headbutts his chin, "you here with me, bud?"

"Mmpf."

Roman's chuckle thrums warmly through his head. "I'll take that as a 'sort of.'"

Half of Virgil expects Roman to gently prod him into taking care of himself the rest of the way: getting him water, making him try and eat a little, getting him out of the gross and sweaty clothes into clean ones, even trying to talk him into taking a shower. And he'd do it, putting up his cursory protests, but that would mean that Roman's getting ready to leave and right now, in the last of the panic, he really wants Princey to stay.

He'd deny it if Roman ever asked him, of course, and he'd throttle Janus before he could chirp how much of a lie that was.

But Roman doesn't do that. Instead, he wraps his arms even more gently around Virgil and tucks him half over his shoulder, almost straddling his lap as one of his hands begins to card through his hair. Pressed chest to chest, he has to stifle another hitching gasp as Princey starts humming. It's a low and gentle tune, almost melancholy, and he swears it's some kind of magic as it reaches into the exhausted heap of emotions still swirling in his gut and starts coaxing it out of him.

Yeah, that means he goes back to crying into Princey's shoulder, but it's a softer cry that feels like he might actually feel better when it's over and he has no idea how Roman knows exactly what to do.

He's not gonna question it though.

There's no way the song Princey's humming is as long as he holds him for, so he must be doing it over and over, which just makes Virgil cry more because Roman is choosing to stay with him right now, he's choosing to let Virgil be a puddle of mess on his lap, and he's still running his fingers lightly over Virgil's back and yes, actually, Virgil would like to stay here forever.

When the tears eventually run out and Virgil's just floating there, in a really pleasant haze, he realizes that Roman isn't going to move until Virgil decides he wants to move. Not when he's just shifting so it's easier for Virgil to breathe, and he's still scratching gently along the space between his shoulder blades.

"…Princey?"

"Hm?"

"How'd…how'd you know what to do?"

Roman turns and noses Virgil's hair. "You told me, remember?"

Virgil's tired brain tries to figure out when he gave Roman the step-by-step on how to give him the best, most indulgent comfort ever and draws a blank. "No. I—when'd I do that?"

Roman's hand stutters for a moment, just a moment, but a moment nonetheless. "Maybe I just figured out why it took me so long to realize what you needed, then."

Talking is hard, and so Virgil doesn't do it, but he does think about it.

4.

"It's not that bizarre of an opinion, to be sure, but the way it's phrased speaks more of an incomplete understanding of the topic than they intended."

"No, I see your point. I mean, I know I'm definitely biased and reading sentences like that tends to make me defensive, but I know that, and I'm trying to work on it." Roman pinches the bridge of his nose. "I think it's just hard because when you make such sweeping generalizations that imply that you really don't know what it is you're talking about, it's hard for me to not be super defensive and stuff, does that make sense?"

"It's another area for you to work on—"

"Yeah, I know."

"—but I see your point. If someone doesn't come to the table in good faith, it's difficult to have good faith yourself." Logan sits back, still pondering the opinion piece in front of them. "Though it is clear they lack the same kind of expertise and knowledge that you do."

"I think that's also why it's hard for me—I can list, like, four different examples offhand that would disprove their point, and at least half a dozen more that show the contradictions they've made in the last paragraph alone—like, I'm not alone here, that part contradicts their point about pacing, doesn't it?"

"Not entirely, but yes, it lends an ambiguity to their earlier statement."

"Right." Roman rubs his forehead and flips through his notebook, brow furrowed. "I swear I remember when we talked about academic continuity, I just need to find that page."

Logan frowns. "When we what?"

Roman looks up, brow furrowed. "When we talked about…you know, the importance of making sure your argument—or your point, sorry—carries through your entire piece?"

"I don't recall that conversation."

"You, um—" Roman starts flipping through his notebook, his movements taking on an increasingly frenetic pace— "you brought one of my papers to me that we talked about and you started going through the um, the problems with the layout and we started talking about the importance of—I swear it's in here, I just need to find it."

Logan sits forward, his brow increasingly furrowing as Roman almost tears a page trying to turn it. "Roman, it's—"

"Here." Roman runs his finger down the page, still not meeting Logan's gaze, "we talked about how it's important to have a coherent theme that the reader can follow and how to acknowledge conflicting viewpoints without placing them in a hierarchy."

Logan blinks. That does sound like a conversation that he and Roman would have—one that he believes he'd rather enjoy—but he has no recollection of it. Roman's expression flickers when he says as much, something almost like panic rising in his gaze before it's quickly stifled.

"Well," he says, forcing a smile onto his face, "perhaps I was just reading it back over and imagined what you'd say."

"I quite like this imaginary version of me, then," Logan jokes, "he makes excellent points."

Roman's reaction is not quite a flinch, but his smile squeezes for a moment too long before he nods.

"Would you mind having it again," Logan asks, "for the sake of—?"

"Oh, I couldn't do it justice," Roman says a little too quickly, "but you, um, you can read it? If you want?"

Logan blinks again, surprise coloring his voice. "You'd let me read your notes?"

"…if…if you want to?"

Waiting for Roman to retract that invitation at any moment—he has never seen Roman fiercer than when something touches his notebooks—Logan reaches out and carefully starts to read. The conversation's transcript—or summary—is fascinating. He finds himself almost mourning the fact that this wasn't a conversation he'd actually had. Although some of the comments that he can tell are his are a touch more callous than he'd prefer, he finds himself engrossed in their dialogue until he gets to the latter half.

Roman's handwriting grows sloppy, as it is wont to do when he gets caught up, but there are occasional splotches of discoloration where it looks like something wet.

"Oh, I was drinking something," Roman says offhandedly when Logan asks, "must've spillled."

"I'm surprised you'd drink around your notebooks, you take such care of them."

"Well, you know me."

Before Logan can point out that he does, that's why he's confused, Roman's saying that he's sorry, but he's a little worn out, would Logan mind terribly if they cut this short a bit? Logan shakes his head and watches Roman pick up his notebook, walking out of his room. That moment of panic lingers in his mind and he frowns, wondering why Roman had panicked.

He thinks about that and the drops of liquid that had obscured a line in Roman's handwriting that just said cut.

5.

Janus hears Roman lie over and over again and he's about to break something.

Every time, he has to hold back his visible surprise that one, Roman is lying so readily, and two, that he's getting away with it. The little prince is a better actor than Janus gave him credit for—than any of them gave him credit for, as it's turning out—and the more times it happens, the more Janus thinks that something right under their noses is going terribly, horribly wrong.

The lies aren't big enough for them to be problems on their own, but they stack on top of each other like pebbles until it feels as though Janus blinks one day and there's a wall between Roman and the rest of them that seems insurmountable. And each time another adds to the mass, he thinks about calling it out, but they're never for something so serious as to warrant a full interrogation and the last thing he wants to do is let Roman know he's suspicious of him.

…it sounds much worse than it is.

It's just that if Roman is this good about keeping everyone off his tail right now, with almost no baseline suspicion or cause for concern, he has no desire to see what would happen if Roman was intent on keeping it a secret. And if he is going to succeed in uncovering why Roman feels so fundamentally scared, something Virgil only admitted after Janus had poked and prodded him for far too long, then he needs all of the rest of them on his side too.

His opportunity comes unexpectedly.

They're having a meeting—not a meeting meeting, they're just talking about what they want to do this weekend—and Roman brings up a conversation they'd had about making sure movie nights were comfortable for everyone. Talking about possible triggers beforehand, making sure everyone had equal access to whatever snacks they wanted, even down to making sure everyone behaved considerately while the movie was playing to ensure everyone was having a good time.

A perfectly reasonable thing to bring up, except that conversation never happened.

"What?" Roman looks around. "Are—it did, I swear. We were—we were getting ready to watch the second Venom movie and Remus brought up the body horror and gore that happens and we started talking about—"

He looks around at them all again.

"Do…do none of you remember this?"

"No, kiddo."

"Not really."

"It would be a good conversation to have, but I don't remember this instance of it."

Remus and Janus just shake their heads, Janus keeping his eyes on Roman as he fiddles with his hands.

Don't lie, Roman, please.

"Sorry," Roman says, flashing a bright smile, "must be getting lost in my Imagination again."

Janus narrows his eyes—not technically a lie, but Roman's leaving something out. For a moment, it seems like the conversation will keep flowing and he'll have to wait for a better time to ask Roman what's wrong, but then Patton's speaking up.

"Kiddo?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?"

Roman laughs. "Yeah, of course, Padre, why wouldn't I be?"

Lie. Janus hisses softly and Roman's head jerks around.

"What's the matter," Logan asks, and Roman jerks again at the gentle tone, "will you talk to us, Roman?"

"You've been acting a little strange for a while now," Patton agrees, taking a step closer, "is everything okay?"

"Yeah, like I said," Roman tries, a smile still sort of on his face, "everything's fine, why are you—"

Janus hisses again as Virgil sits up. "Princey, you don't have to be scared, you can—"

"I'm not scared!"

The stronger lie sears across Janus's tongue as Roman winces at the force of his own shout. He pinches the bridge of his nose. No one dares move for several long seconds. Just when Logan looks like he's about to say something, Roman takes a deep breath and lowers his head.

"I'm sorry," he says in a voice that sounds so mournful it makes Janus's chest ache, "I didn't mean to shout or snap at you. You didn't deserve it, I'm sorry. I think I—I've just been spending too much time in the Imagination again."

As soon as he finishes talking, he braces. Like he's expecting to get hit. He hears Remus make a worried noise next to him, starting to reach out.

"Little one," Logan says gently, "we're not angry with you, there's no need for all of that."

Roman's eyes snap open and at the look of pure confusion on his face, a few more of them let out little sounds. Virgil stands up and Roman turns too quickly to face him.

"Hey, Princey," Virgil soothes, his hands up, "I'm not moving, okay? I'm just worried. You're—I can feel you freaking out a little that's all."

"Sweetheart," Patton calls next and Janus winces at how much Roman's neck keeps snapping back and forth, "sweetheart, it's okay, you're safe, it's gonna be okay."

"Back off a bit, we're crowding him."

All of them—except for Remus—take a step back. Remus edges closer and closer to Roman until he can rest a hand on Roman's shoulder. Roman just trembles and Remus cups the side of his face.

"Hey, Roro. Look at me. Just at me, okay?"

"I don't—this wasn't—"

"Breathe," Remus bids softly, and Roman draws a few gasping breaths.

"This wasn't supposed to happen."

"What wasn't?"

"This—I—I don't—"

Remus opens his mouth to say something else when it morphs into a wordless sound of surprise as Roman sinks out abruptly, leaving him scrabbling at the empty air as the rest of them rush forward.

"What happened?"

"Where'd he go?"

"Did we do something to upset him?"

"What's going on?"

Janus doesn't say anything, still staring at the spot where Roman had been. He thinks about all of the lies he's heard, all of the things Roman hasn't said, and how out of all of the things Roman lied about, he'd never lied about being lost in the Imagination.

A conclusion starts to take shape.

+1.

"No wonder you've been so off, your head hasn't been attached to you since you lost it."

"It's a bad idea to spend so much time in the Imagination, Roman, you know that."

"That sounds really irresponsible, Roman. You should know better."

"Quit hogging the Imagination, I need to use it too."

"Oh, of course you were, Roman, did you honestly think we'd expected anything different?"

"You need to be better disciplined, if you can't get the work done you need to before deciding to go off and play."

"Sheesh, Princey, are you really that selfish?"

"If it's getting so bad that you're having delusions, then you need to stop, kiddo."

"Oh, no, Roman's having trouble understanding what's real again."

"The fuck is wrong with you?"

"You're being dramatic, pull yourself together."

"Your crocodile tears aren't convincing anyone, you know."

"Stop crying, you're not a baby."

"Do you think that if you throw a big or pathetic enough tantrum, it'll get us to spoil you? Grow up."

"Stupid."

"Ridiculous."

"Pathetic."

"Annoying."

"Worthless."

"You can't do anything right."

"You're being ridiculous."

"We should never have relied on you."

"I knew you couldn't handle it."

"We're better off without you."

Roman curls up around his pillow, wedging himself deeper into the corner. He jams his face between it and the wall. He tries to keep his hands out of sight. He counts in his head as he breathes, trying to keep it as even as possible. Eventually it will be over. He just has to last until then. Then he can go to his room and cuddle his plushie dragon and be upset there, out of the way, and hurt all by himself. It's safer that way.

He keeps his breathing nice and steady, letting the hurt course through him. The voices keep going, taunting, mocking, yelling, scolding, until they start to just say his name over and over. Roman, Roman, Roman, Roman—

"Roman!"

Something like a frenzied scream comes from behind him and he turns his face deeper into the wall.

"What the fuck are those things?"

"Shit, how long have those been here?"

"Are they—are they supposed to be us?"

"Yeah, fucked up and cruel versions of us, not on my fucking watch!"

Several wet splats come from behind him and then there are hands on his shoulder, running through his hair, and someone that feels like Remus is murmuring in his ear.

"Hey, Roro, it's over. I destroyed them, they're gone, it's the real us. We're here, we're really here, just—just come out of there, okay?"

Oh. It's this one.

He always finds this one the cruelest, where they lure him in with promises of comfort and safety only to turn on him when he reveals what he's actually upset about. No, thank you, he's hurting just fine on his own.

"Roro, please, come out of there, it's okay, it's all gonna be okay."

"Let me try," he hears Logan's voice say, and then the Remus is moving away and there's another hand on his shoulder, "dear, it's alright. You're going to give yourself neck pain if you stay like that, come here…"

Despite his chest howling at him not to, Roman lets Logan coax him out from the corner. Each word of gentle praise just makes it worse—it's going to hurt so much when they start being mean again.

"Princey—" and there's Virgil— "hey, stay with us, okay? Just focus on us, Pat, do you want to—"

"I got it."

Despite himself, a wounded noise leaves Roman's throat as a blanket gets draped over his shoulders. Careful touches smooth it down, more hands helping to secure it in place, and he just curls up so small under it so he doesn't get used to the warmth.

Just get it over with. Just get it over with. Just get it over with.

"Sweetie," he hears, and flinches at the touch of a smooth hand and a scaled hand on his face.

Wait, what?

Janus never takes his gloves off. Not here. Not like this. They can't—they can't be this cruel to him, not today, not when everything already hurts so much.

"Cut," he manages, "cut."

But the hands don't leave and he looks up to see Janus, actual real Janus looking at him and then he smiles softly and calls him sweetie again, and then Logan is appearing over his shoulder and Patton's adjusting the blanket and Virgil and Remus are keeping watch at the corners of the room and—and—and—

"Come here, sweetie," Janus murmurs and he's falling into his chest and there's a kiss being pressed to his temple and it's warm and soft and—

"Shh, Princey," Virgil says as a thread of panic starts to wind its way around his chest, "it's okay, you're okay," and—

"Come this way a little," Logan coaxes as something soft appears under him, "come lie down, you're alright," and—

"There you are," Patton's voice says as something starts to cuddle him, gently yet firmly and it's so surreal and—

"Oh, Roro," Remus mumbles as his brother's arms wrap firmly around him, "this is real, I promise, I promise we're here with you, everything's gonna be okay, okay? We're here, we're real, you're real, everything's gonna be okay now," and—

—and then Roman doesn't think anymore.

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl

[memberment]

good morning everyone

yes it's 7pm.

no I did not just wake up for the day, but I did just wake up from a nap and honestly all I really did was read trashy webtoons and get like 500 words out meanwhile I have homework due at 3am so I might as well have just woken up.

idk y'all I was rlly sleepy today.

I got through a bunch of fun in Morning Glory but I think I'm switching back over to Revelations again bc lowk I think I can only write so much fluff before I'm like okay where the fuck is the plot???

Idk guys think I might be duo writing atp bc I get bored from things being too good and then devastated bc Revelations is lowk gut wrenching along with the scary shit LMAOO

whatever whatever updates here AFTER I get some of my work done bc goddamn, am I behind.

(12:11) so guys I totally did shit on my physics test but ngl actually kind of understanding what I was doing made me feel like god's favorite questionably gendered royalty so I think I'm gonna force myself to learn physics.

but tomorrow because I actually just spent like five hours working on pulling myself together for said test and I'm kinda dead inside. I'm going back to working on Revelations in the meantime. I'm gonna post Tweek's guide either like later or what you folk constitute as tomorrow (me personally, Tuesday is Tuesday but whatever) because I just do not have the energy to think up a chapter title at the moment. And I know I've mentioned this but y'all I am never waiting to make chapter titles again like they're just getting done as we go now. Summaries too bc FUCK THAT idk why I didn't think this would be an issue literally like THREE MONTHS AGO when these got finished god bless

(2:09) Revelations is at like 3.5k and lowk I am like DRAGGING my feet with this beginning chapter. Like, it's literally just this beginning bit I keep jumping back into my notes to write stuff from later in the fic LMFAOO

Like, I know once I get past 17 it's gonna go so fast but GODDDDD, trying to write the same things but ever so slightly different and then some different events entirely thrown in there is making my head hurt because idk like what exactly I want to include. Like, yes, we get our boys finalizing their contracts. BUT NOW WHAT. LIKE AM I FLESHING OUT THIS ENTIRE MEET UP????

DOES KENNY ACTUALLY EXPLODE AT SAID MEET UP OR AM I MAKING AN EXCUSE FOR THIS???

Bc I do kinda want everyone to see Clyde break his arm for the first time on page. (Speaking of, him and Kenny are talking in this first chapter AND THEY'RE SO FUCKING AWKWARD LIKE IT'S ACTUALLY PAINFUL LMFAOOOO)

but ugh

yk what I'm going back to reading trashy webtoons for the next few business hours bc my best ideas seem to come to me at twilight and it is 2am. LATER!

(6:15) I've decided to force myself to post guide. I swear to god I need like a calendar person to scream at me when I don't post LMAOOOO LIKE I DA WILL FORGET

(6:52) Guys I have re-fallen in love with Lost, my god.

[ingravinoveritas]

Hello there! I hope you are doing well (as well as someone who has completed watching season 2) First of all congrats on moving into a new house! I'm still having lots of Feelings™ to process after finishing the second season.. oh god the acting, the genuine emotions on the faces of both Michael and David this time around... I'm simultaneously radiating happiness and being utterly destroyed. And the increasing intimacy between them in the interviews is not helping matters either... I think (this has been marinating in my head for a while) one of the reasons they are doing this is to physically reassure each other that they are not apart, they are still a team and still on their side, because after the heart wrenching ending of the season, it would have been very hard for them to come to terms with it, as they had put their whole beings, their whole souls into playing Azi and Crowley, which might have made it difficult to draw a line where the characters ended and they begin... So the touches, their body language became a sort of coping mechanism, something which said 'hey, don't worry, I'm still here.. I have not gone away, we're still together' and this makes me wanna cry again 😭

I hope my word vomit makes an iota of sense (English is not my first language by a long shot, so) and I hope you do find some time to rest and have a warm beverage of your choice while unwinding. Stay safe and blessed!!

Hi there! Thank you so much for the congrats on my move, I truly appreciate it. I've actually had a very rough couple of days, as on top of the move, my Facebook account was hacked earlier this week, and it essentially pushed me over the edge and I was crying for much of Monday and felt like I had a crying "hangover" all day Tuesday.

You do not at all have to apologize for your Ask--your English is very good!--and I'm glad to read your thoughts as I make my way through all the Anons still residing in my inbox. Truly, we are fortunate to have GO 2 and Michael and David to focus on, as well as the abundance of interviews we've gotten after months and months of little to no content.

To start: I absolutely agree with you, re: the intimacy between Michael and David in these interviews. It's been so fascinating to see them get more flirty and touchy-feely with each progressive interview (I know we don't know the order in which they were done, but I imagine the flirting/touching increased as the day went on). And while I can definitely see them doing what you described--reassuring each other, touching and being close as a coping mechanism--my feeling is they already did all that last year, probably right after filming That Scene. (There is actually a gorgeous MS/DT fic on AO3 right now that depicts exactly that, and it's definitely worth reading.)

But in terms of all the intimacy and touching in the more recent interviews (from last month), I think what we're seeing is something else. I think Michael and David are beyond the need for reassurance because they are so comfortable with each other and know they're still together, permanently. There's no more of the uncertainty of parting ways after the promo interviews end--only the promise of seeing each other again as soon as both their lives and schedules allow it.

There have been so many moments of telling body language and touches and expressions, but if I had to pick a favorite (well, a few), one would be them walking arm-in-arm onto The One Show:

And the other would be David leaning so far over and draping his arm around Michael in the Amazon Q&A video:

...And of course (and possibly most notable), Michael and David seemingly unconsciously moving closer to each other in the TV Insider interview:

It's so telling that there is no urgency or desperateness to any of this--only comfort and very much that sense of "on our side" that you mentioned. Walking out arm-in-arm as they did in particular adds to that "us against the world" feeling and the not-so-subtle implication that while they were Michael Sheen and David Tennant on the season one press tour, here, now, they are Michael and David. Inseparable, always intertwined, and having so much more of themselves in the characters of Aziraphale and Crowley than in the first season.

So yes, everything you wrote absolutely did make sense, and I appreciate you writing in to share your thoughts with me. I have a lot more thoughts/analysis about GO season 2 still to share, which I hope to do in response to the numerous Anons still waiting in my inbox. Thanks for writing in! x

[queseraone]

Writer’s ask game: anything you haven’t already been asked or answered

😘

4. How do you channel characters' voices and personalities? I watch scenes over and over again, and honestly I find reading other fic helpful. This sounds awful, but reading examples of something that isn't in their voice or matching their personality makes it clearer when it's right.

6. Do you prefer writing shorter, standalone fics or longer, multi-chapter stories? I definitely lean toward one-shots. (And let me just call myself out here... I've written one multi-chapter fic and it's been sitting unfinished for 5+ years 🙈) So if I was to try to tackle another multi-chapter idea, I'd need to have a clear vision for how to have it play out.

8. Do you have any rituals or habits that help you get into the zone? No, but I really should try to create some lol.

9. Have you ever collaborated with someone else on a fic? Yes! It's a fun challenge and I'm excited to do it again!

13. What's the most challenging aspect of writing fanfiction for you? Feeling confident in my ideas. That feels like a stupid thing to say, but I struggle with coming up with ideas for stories. If I have a vision, I can (usually) execute it, but so often I find myself questioning if an idea is worth writing or not. (Also summaries, they're a bitch!)

16. How important is it to you to stay true to the original creator's vision while writing fanfiction? It's extremely important to me. To me, that's the whole point of fanfiction - you love the characters enough that you want to play with them! If you throw their original characterizations out the window, you're just writing original fiction and plugging in the characters' names. [steps down from soapbox]

17. What's the most memorable comment or review you've received on one of your fics? Oh man, can I say all of them??? I truly cannot express how much joy a comment brings, and I absolutely go back and re-read them when I'm feeling down about my writing. My favourite is when someone quotes my work back at me, I swear it makes my face hurt from grinning so hard!

19. What's the most unusual or unique setting you've used? I guess the ski cabin because it's so far removed from Los Angeles?

20. How do you approach action sequences or intense moments? Action scenes are scary, and I'm not super keen on tackling that again - but I will say what helps is (I sound like a broken record on this point) having someone you can bounce things around with, and (as stupid as this sounds) blocking it. I mimed kicking my husband down the stairs to figure out where Lucy's foot would connect with her attacker (and good thing I did, because it was way higher up than I'd guessed!)

22. What role does humor play in your writing? Do you enjoy adding comedic elements to your fics? I don't consider myself a funny person. I try to inject humour into my writing sometimes (depending on the situation), but I'm not sure it's super successful!

23. How do you write endings for your fics? Do you prefer open-ended or conclusive conclusions? I hate endings. Hmm maybe this is my answer for #13. I think sometimes you go into a fic knowing exactly how you want it to end (sometimes even down the closing line), and other times I find myself circling the drain, totally lost on the right way to close it. The story never really ends as far as I'm concerned, so I lean more open-ended I guess? Especially since I tend to write more missing moments.

24. What advice would you give to someone who wants to start writing fanfiction? Don't be afraid to ask for help. Check your grammar (little things like your/you're go a loooong way). And please make sure you're spelling characters' names correctly... But truly just go for it. There's an audience out there for pretty much everything!

26. How do you approach plot twists or surprises in your fics? So I'm absolutely evil and absolutely live for this kind of moment. I still feel a sense of (villainous) pride over the plot twist I threw into the end of the opening chapter of an old fic. It's fun keeping people on their toes!

27. What two (or more) fandoms would you like to see a crossover for? Would you ever write it? Do I have to pick? Because I'm truly not a fan of crossover fics, especially between fandoms! And I don't really watch many other shows right now, so it's hard to say. Chenford getting called in to break up a fight between queens on RuPaul's Drag Race? That's the best I can come up with!

29. Are there any characters, relationships, or general character dynamics you've never written about but would like to try? Nearly everything I've written in this fandom is jut Tim and Lucy. Other characters' involvement has ranged from minimal to nonexistent, so I think it would be fun to play with that more. Top of my list would be to write more Tim and Angela moments, because they're my favourite relationship outside of Chenford.

30. How do you handle writing multiple storylines or subplots? I've never tried!

31. Do you prefer writing from a single character's perspective or switching between different viewpoints? I think I prefer picking a single character and writing from their perspective (still in the third person though), but I'm certainly not opposed to switching back and forth.

32. Have you ever participated in fanfiction contests, challenges/fests? YES! @chenfordsecretsanta, we'll see y'all again next year! And I participated in Chenford Week for the first time last summer!

33. How do you incorporate world-building elements into your fics? I haven't really done this, I tend to just stick within the show's universe.

34. Are there any fic writing tips or tricks you've learned along the way that you'd like to share? If you're unsure about dialogue, say it out loud. It's weird but highly effective. And for the love of god, if you wake up in the middle of the night with an idea (because that's always when it happens) make the note. No, you will not remember it in the morning.

Now I need a fucking nap, holyyyyyy. If you've made it to the end, congratulations, you deserve a trophy 🏆

[cactusspatz]

June recs

Quiet month for me, I was doing a lot of re-reading, so have a small random assortment of four stories!

Guanyin's Gift by Potboy/ @galadhir (Untamed/MDZS, JGY/LXC)

You can't build a goddess of mercy a large temple and pay for priests to worship her every day without earning at least some merit. Aka, by divine mercy, Jin Guangyao gets a chance to do his life all over again.

Excellent time-travel fix-it, JGY-style (so: subtlety and rumor and spycraft, with a side of making sure His People are all happy).

Reunion Dinner by vivisextion (Untamed/MDZS, gen)

Jiang Cheng realises that his own nephew has never tried his mother's signature dish, and takes it upon himself to rectify this.

Definitely a premise I've seen before, but his journey to re-creating the recipe draws in a lot of other characters in sweet ways - and also uses the author's own recipe/experience. Very satisfying.

Ready for Love by @idiopathicsmile (Singin' in the Rain, Cosmo/Don/Kathy)

Don and Kathy would move in together. They would have a dog or two and then inevitably, a small parade of adorable little brats who would call him Uncle Cosmo, and they would spend less and less time with him, not on purpose but busy with the rest of their lives, and ultimately Cosmo would learn to make his peace with it because he’d have no other choice and he would have to try to move on and not live too much in his memories. He could picture it so clearly, he figured if the songwriting gig with Monumental didn’t pan out, he could always return to the backwater circuit with a new act: The Amazing Cosmo of the Cosmos—ladies and gentlemen, he sees the future, he reads the stars, he silently pines for his best married pal and all the while tap dancing! Don and Kathy inviting him along on their honeymoon, though—that part was a surprise.

Hilarious, darling post-movie get-together featuring note-perfect banter and pining ADHD Cosmo.

Running Behind by @asidian (Final Fantasy XV, gen)

There's a tag hanging on his storage pod, instead of the clipboard that documents his progress. On that tag, there's a single word stamped in red: defective. NH-01987's feet stick on the metal of the catwalk. Behind the ever-present metallic mask, his eyes grow huge. He knows what that tag means. It means that, in the morning, while the other MT units are collected for training, a guard will come for him. He'll be restrained and escorted down the metal corridors toward the east wing, into the double-doors that house the correctional facility. But he won't be up for re-programming, not this time. This time, they'll strap him down to a table for the last time ever. They'll pick him apart, to try and learn what caused his failures – and he has so very many of them, no matter how hard he's tried. When they're finished, they'll take what's left to the crematory. That will be the end of him: a pile of ashes and a wisp of smoke.

I don't even go here, but I just could not resist a return to my fannish roots of reading fic about a fugitive child soldier with a barcode tattoo learning how to be a person - and it's a gorgeous h/c fic in its own right. 10/10 will comfort read again.

[prosperdemeter2]

What is your personal favorite Diaz sibling dynamic you've written, considering you've played with all of the age orders and even a twin dynamic in a fic? Was it hard to go from the antagonistic/bigoted role Adrianna had in day by day to the more positive close sibling relationship she has in a fic like the blue house?

(sorry if this is a strange question, just something I was wondering about while rereading)

Omg no this is a wonderful question.

Adriana in "day by day"... the whole sibling dynamic in that is so incredibly SPECIAL to me because, in a lot of conscious ways, it mirrors the dynamic in my immediate family. Only I am the Sophia in everything. I will say that my story hasn't quite... ended as well (if we can say that) and the one with the Diaz siblings in that, and "day by day" in general will always be special to me because of the emotional work I put into writing it. Writing Eddie’s relationship with Sophia bloom and his relationship with Adriana fracture to a breaking point while my own with my middle sister (I'm the youngest) fell apart for something that isn't the same but is similar was... enlightening. Helpful. I've shared it with my therapist.

Now the Diaz sibling dynamic is so much fun to write because, in canon, we literally have NOTHING to base it off of besides names and the implication that they're around for Big Emotional moments (re: Shannon’s funeral, Eddie’s shield ceremony?). Besides season two, I'm 90% sure they're not even mentioned again until a throw away line in season five. We don't know their age gaps except that Eddie *can't* be the youngest. We don't know if he's the oldest or the middle or, as in "the blue house", if he's a twin. We don't know if they get along, if they hate each other, or if they're like a lot of siblings as they get older and grow apart... just sort of ambivalent. So I have a LOT of fun coming up with new dynamics for them.

As for my favorite to write... Eddie and Sophia in "day by day" will always be so special to me, and as much as it was heartbreaking, Eddie’s arc with Adriana in that series will always have a special place in my heart as well. I WILL say, the hardest "switch" was finishing "day by day" and writing "rewrite" where Eddie has an admirable relationship with BOTH of his sisters and is the middle child, rather than the oldest. I remember whining to a few friends about how difficult the mental switch was sometimes 😅.

The dynamic in "the blue house" was just *fun*, you know? I've never seen anyone make Eddie a twin before, him being older than Adriana by literal minutes was a fun little Easter egg for if I ever write a part two, and the division of Eddie and Adriana as a team, and Sophia being removed from their little world was... such a swap.

All of this is a longwinded way of saying... I don't know? I would hate to say "day by day" because Adriana and Eddie were so... fractured by the end. But I honestly think that one might be it. I can't help but read Adriana’s lines over, and Eddie’s responses (and even Buck’s in "almost home") and wish I could scream them at my own sister and get the response he did. Anger at first, and apology and acceptance that the relationship will never be the same, in the end. I look at Adriana and see my sister, and Eddie and see my *other* sister, and Sophia stuck in the middle (their "built in buffer") and see myself.

Please, ask me questions like this whenever you want, I LOVE giving into the ramble urge 🩵

[omaano]

more rambly thoughts about weapons (this is turning out to be a long one): -the darksaber is a weapon (sword), the beskar spear is a weapon (spear) -perhaps omega lends you her bow (bow), because hades itself definitely differentiates between a gun and a bow (adamant rail/vs coronacht). alternatively (sorry for bad batch-ifying your hades au it will likely happen again), crosshair's sniper rifle. -anyway, the rail would likely be a blaster of some sort, a dc-17 maybe? as a reference to the clones? (gun) -that leaves the shield and fists, then, which--- what the heck man, why is this so hard to pull from star wars lore. uh. who's big on martial arts? the jedi, i would imagine, so maybe the fists are… hm. nothing is coming to mind re: the jedi. what IS coming to mind is two things: darth vader's gloves of force choking (idk man), and mandalorian gauntlets/vambraces (din's whistling birds?). so one of those two, maybe? (fists). WAIT. i had a thought. it is bad batch associated but you can kill me for it later. WRECKER'S GLOVES!! there we go. -shield is a bit harder--- i'm considering leaning mando for that because they're big on armour, uhhhh….. the only shields that are coming to mind aren't even mando, they're the goddamn plasma shields used in TBOBF against boba and fennec. hold up let me go reference a fic--- okay wookieepedia is giving me silandra's shield, a legendary plasma shield used during the high republic era, or a simple light-shield, used by jedi younglings in training but able to deflect lightsabers and blasterbolts. okay i am thinking light shield with an aspect of silandra! (shield)

I've been promising this answer for well over a month please forgive me for taking so long! I sadly didn't have as much time as I would have liked to spend on the Hades AU in August ^^; Thank you so much @elwinged for sharing these super insightful thoughts as well, they were amazing to read and re-read! <3

Hades AU WEAPONS - and ASPECTS

First things first, I'll admit that I haven't thought about much of these on my own, so I'm just very thrilled and excited to dig into what you'd sent me! *A* (I'm combing the weapons and aspects together, hopefully in a coherent and somewhat structured manner)

SWORD

The darksaber is a weapon

Aspects: "darksaber probably turns into several different lightsabers: obi-wan's, anakin's/vader's, luke's? maybe ahsoka?"

This is the one thing were I won't have many thoughts to add, except that this would need some workshoping (mostly because I cannot think of any sword variants that's not "just" a vibrosword (Din would probably love to change the Darksaber to something less cursed XD) - but also wouldn't it be real funny if the Darksaber was just the Darksaber? No aspects, Din got it, Din is stuck with it in that one single form, there is nothing he can do about it.

I love all your suggestions, but I think I will just stick with this one because it's too hilarious to me. The Darksaber is the Darksaber, no two ways about it, sorry Din, you're stuck with it.

SPEAR

The beskar spear is a weapon

Aspects: "beskar spear becomes maul's double-bladed saber, savage opress' spear and perhaps venestra rwoh's lightwhip?"

I really like the idea of Savage's spear, but (after some minor googling) I like the Mon Calamari blaster spear (it's not very practical on land, but... we need some variety. Plus you get access to aspects through character interaction in Hades, right? Like another character gets reminded of that aspect and such... I guess Kit could be a lead in for this one, as Maul would be with Savage's spear).

(As a tangent I've also found the Lasan bo-rifle, but goddamnit I've kept most of the Rebels influence out of this AU too, so that only gets an honorable mention here.)

There are also electrostaffs that Zygerians used, that's one sided/ended (and Rex must be (unfortunately) very familiar with them since he used one to impale that slaver at the end of the Zygerrian arc)... I'm not a 100% set on this, but the other alternative I can think about is a shock trooper's electro-staff...

Venestra's lightwhip is more of a lightsaber, I guess? (I haven't yet watched the last two episodes of The Acolyte so don't at me here) so that doesn't really track here imo.

BOW

"perhaps omega lends you her bow, because hades itself definitely differentiates between a gun and a bow (adamant rail/vs coronacht). alternatively (sorry for bad batch-ifying your hades au it will likely happen again), crosshair's sniper rifle."

I think in this case it might be better to indeed keep the differentiation between bow and blaster (even if it will probably be a lot more difficult to collect enough aspects for a bow), and so let's not bad batchify the bow just yet XD (I've been fighting very hard NOT to allow the Bad Batch into this AU, only Omega and Echo got a pass from that ban)

Aspects: "bow maybe has an aspect of crosshair (sniper rifle), chewbacca's bow-caster, and… a nightsister bow? maybe swap omega and nightsister around and have the more basic version be the base weapon"

Yes to all of those and...I'm really feeling our limitations here for a 4th option because all i found was the Ewok's bow and arrow. So how about we downgrade a little to the energy slingshot that Ezra has in the beginning of Rebels?

RAIL

"anyway, the rail would likely be a blaster of some sort, a dc-17 maybe? as a reference to the clones? (gun)"

I suppose it is a better question if this is a handblaster or more of a sniper rifle. I don't know the rail all that much because for the life of me I cannot make it work (I don't remember how I managed to make a single successful run with it in the first place... so I don't remember how it works in-game) since Din has a variation of those on his person at all times. So the "rail" either stands in for the Amban Rifle, or the handblaster at his hip.

(I'll veto the DC-17 since that was nominated as Rex's keepsake, so let's not confuse those two, yeah?)

Aspects: "rail has an aspect of padme (she's my GIRL), ezra's bow-lightsaber monstrosity, and perhaps leia's blaster? feel like that's quite similar to padme's though… we'll workshop it"

I was thinking that Crosshair's rifle would fit better here (both Omega and Fennec can hint at access to that?), Ezra's lightsaber-blaster combination is a genius thing, no badmouthing that horrible creation, I love that! :D and sure, I guess Padme's little screwdriver looking blaster pistol can also be an aspect?

FISTS

"[...]what IS coming to mind is two things: darth vader's gloves of force choking (idk man), and mandalorian gauntlets/vambraces (din's whistling birds?). so one of those two, maybe? (fists). WAIT. i had a thought. it is bad batch associated but you can kill me for it later. WRECKER'S GLOVES!! there we go."

Aspects: "fists.. .maybe they start out as din's whistling birds, then aspect of wrecker, vader and…. boba (flamethrower)? i also just read about mandalorian crushgaunts (beskar reinforced gloves) which could also be the base, and swap out whistling birds for boba?"

The basic weapon can be a Mandalorian gauntlet (but the whistling birds I was planning to keep for the Cast attack, since it's with Din at all times, and so are his vambraces. I couldn't think of any other long-range weapon on his person that wouldn't become a changable thing with all these other weapons. Plus there is also a limit to how many times and how fast you can fire those, so I think that tracks alright) But I can get behind the others... I don't remember what's up with Wrecker's gloves, but I do seem to remember Black Krrssantan (sorry for any spelling mistakes) having his electric knuckle dusters that can also pack a punch.

SHIELD

"shield is a bit harder [...] the only shields that are coming to mind aren't even mando, they're the goddamn plasma shields used in TBOBF against boba and fennec. [...] or a simple light-shield, used by jedi younglings in training but able to deflect lightsabers and blasterbolts."

Aspects : "shield-- aspect of silandra (a legendary plasma shield used during the high republic era), uhhhhh OOH obi wan's saber because soresu, and. uh. enfys nest's gauntlets? they're technically gauntlets, as titled, so they could be slotted in as an aspect of fists, but they fan out to be mini shields, so…."

Mandalorians can have a small shield of their own (as seen on Paz and Bo-Katan both), so that's good for base, with and aspect of Silandra, and Enfys Nest (that's made of beskar plates too, isn't it?)... and like what could be the last one. The idea of Soresu is absolutely hilarious (mostly because Din would be so bad at it ,so it would also track as a legendary aspect, considering how those are supposed to be more tricky to use?) but also like. What if it's just Din's beskar armor turned up to 11? XD I really have nothing better here ^^;

[soleminisanction]

It's telling how, on the rare occasion somebody takes enough umbrage with one of my Steph-crit posts to try and argue with them, the go-to strategy isn't to try to deny that Steph did the things being described, or to re-examine the universe context, or even to insist that said things weren't actually bad at all and shouldn't be criticized.

Instead, the refrain I hear time and again is, "Well what about the bad things Tim did to her, huh?!" and then they're rarely able to come up with much of anything.

Like, the most recent one is somebody who reblogged my post off another's blog while having me blocked so I can't actually reblog their response to answer them, but they tried to be like, "Okay, let's talk about all the times Tim violated Steph's boundaries!!" and then came up with a grand of three... two of which were not by any stretch of the imagination boundary violations ("leading her on" with that first thanks-for-saving-my-life kiss, and holding it over her head that he knew her ID when she didn't know his), and the third of which I don't actually remember happening ("coming back to her house when she told him to stay away" -- that sounds like a common enough plot beat in a superhero romance that I don't wanna say it never happened but I don't remember it).

Another was the only set of argumentative comments I've ever gotten on Sticks & Stones, where they were like, "You didn't talk about how much Tim hurt her, it's so one-sided!!" and I was just like, "...I mean they talked about their last break-up in the fic and how upset it made her but that kind of pales in comparison to the mental abuse that the fic was actually focused on, what more were you expecting?" and it turned out they'd never read any comics but Steph's Batgirl run and just assumed there must have been more to it because of that.

It's mostly just poorly thought out defensiveness of their favorite character in an us vs. them mindset. Still, it's this underlying attitude of, "My fav can't actually have done anything wrong so the person she hurt must've deserved it somehow!!" that's just... telling, y'know?

[sitp-recs]

Hi! Ok so I'm in the mood for some drarry first recs. Like they are each other's first kiss, first dates, loss of virginity, etc. I'll take just about anything. Also dark!Harry recs. Where drarry are together and something bad happens to Draco (either he dies or ends up severely injured/in a coma) and Harry seeks out revenge on those who did it and turns evil. I know that's a lot but I'd really appreciate it. Please and thank you in advance!

Hello! I did a list for Dark!Harry a while ano but that might not be what you’re looking for - tbh I don’t think I’m familiar with fics where he goes evil to save/avenge Draco (would love to read those!) but I’m sure my followers can help. As for first times, here are some recs for you:

A world just for us by nerakrose (G, 2k)

Harry and Draco go flying and then…continue to go flying.

Draco at Nineteen by birdsofshore (E, 5k)

It's the middle of the night and Harry Potter is sitting on my bed looking distinctly weird. I've had some fucked-up dreams in my time, but this one... this one is something new.

Slip Into My Lover's Hands by @lqtraintracks (E, 6k)

Draco licks his lips. He shuts his eyes, because he doesn't think he can look at Potter when he says it. When he asks for it. "One finger?"

Night Changes by @writcraft (E, 10k)

Draco and Harry have spent years dancing around one another, but Potter’s straight and married. Until one day he isn’t.

The Eighth Tale by lettered (E, 12k)

Draco Malfoy tries to fix the past, but instead mucks it up some more. For Harry, it all becomes quite clear.

Welcome to the Broom Closet by incapricious (E, 23k)

Harry thinks he knows how his life will go: Become an Auror. Marry Ginny. Have a family. But then he sees an advertisement in the paper that no one else can see, and his life is turned upside-down. The Broom Closet: you can be anyone you want while you're there, but you won't remember it in the morning.

Speak (and may the world come undone) by @shealwaysreads (E, 26k)

The war is on in earnest, and the hunt for the Horcruxes has begun. Harry receives help from the least expected person, and must decide whether he can trust the enemy he knows best.

Your Place or Mine? by @l0vegl0wsinthedark (E, 26k)

"This person is so much harder to hate. And I’m supposed to hate Malfoy. How the fuck else am I supposed to limit this to just sex?"

Buds, Blooms, and Beards by @corvuscrowned (E, 27k)

Harry and Ginny have built an easy, happy life for themselves after the war. They run a thriving plant shop together, they have a great relationship, and they're definitely not gay.

I Bet That You Look Good on the Dancefloor by birdsofshore (E, 28k)

Harry felt lit up from inside as soon as he entered the bar. There were blokes dancing together, their bodies close to one another, not keeping a wary distance as Harry was always careful to do when he was near another man.

Romp and Circumstance by @wolfpants (E, 35k)

Since the war, Harry Potter has gone from Saviour to Scoundrel—not that he’s complaining. With a schedule full of gorgeous men, alcohol, and late nights, why would he want to change? Enter Draco Malfoy: beautiful, sharp, and completely untouchable. When Draco comes to Harry with a proposition to help him attract an engagement, Harry’s up for it—after all, how hard can it be not falling for his former nemesis?

Dwelling by aideomai (T, 83k)

Curses, James and Lily Potter ride again, several Ministry balls, a teenage Summer of Love, a grim young adult dystopian winter, a few different Draco Malfoys, secrets and the problems re: not having any, alternate lives, impossible lives, real lives, allusions to Dirty Dancing, and just because it's not called the Mirror of Erised doesn't mean you shouldn't know better.

Reparo by amalin (E, 84k)

Voldemort's final defeat does not mean Harry Potter's troubles are over; far from it. In the aftermath of war, he returns to a Hogwarts that is fractured and divided, but this is no break that can be fixed with a spell. New owls, fading scars, surprising alliances—and along the way, the hardest task of all, to live with it.

Far From The Tree by aideomai (E, 112k)

The arrival of Harry Potter’s children—snapped back in time, the children themselves guessed, twenty or so years—was the most interesting thing to happen at Hogwarts for years.

A Secondary Education by Thunderbird587 (E, 234k)

Fleeing the aftermath of his recent divorce, Draco Malfoy takes up a post as the new Potions Master at Hogwarts. At first he believes his hopes for a fresh start are dashed when he sees that a certain boyhood rival is on staff there as well. But Harry Potter is being weirdly nice to him, leaving Draco no choice but to play along.

[washymylifeaway]

hi rye how have you been spending your time LET ME TELL YOU.

kavetham? haikaveh? idk idc but them..

for starters i just want to put out there that if kavetham is my sakuatsu then cynonari is the sunaosa because i love them and if the bestie agenda isn't alive between at least one pair in the four i get so sad. anyways kavetham has taken over my ao3 and it's so bad LOL. this is mostly for me because i like having consolidated lists of fics i've read to go back to but i'll be kind and give the tumblrinas (?) a little taste too. anyways list under the cut also don't follow me for genshin i'm not a genshin girlie (famous last words)

pre warning, i think it goes without saying that there's like alcohol mentioned in like almost every single fic.. kaveh is (apparently but what would i know) not the healthiest when it comes to coping habits so .. forgive him..

check the warnings and the tags before you read!

truck, barter, and trade by Seungshi03 (T) 20.7k // when i tell you if you're going to read one fic on this list it should be this one. the humor. the plot. the kid. this needs to be framed and immortalized. they're so stupid they're so silly THEY'RE SO IN LOVE

rumors, fame, and reputation by rysarium (T) 27k // THIS. READ IT PLEASE. it's so so funny and very entertaining. you go from loving them to wanting to punch them so bad to loving them again. i will say i thought it was so unfair for kaveh to get the movie wrong because technically he heard it from source so what there was an interview 1034209384 years ago let al-haitham lie in peace (ALSO CYNO IM YOUR BIGGEST FAN YOURE SO FUNNY KING SPEAK YOUR TRUTH)

The Fall, the Rise, and Everything In-between by writingrosez (T) 22.9k // i really did dread the divorce arc in this one i knew it was coming but i really was hoping it wouldn't but it happened (when i say i verbally said NO so many times while reading this LMFAO embarrassing.. i'd do it again...) also poor lumine LMFAO

if i wake up and you're still here by alcyonenight (M) 8.4k // no because why did this fic literally have me punching my screen (completely real) while i was reading it. they both are so silly and dear to me (said in tears) but i love the hanahaki trope so bad and this was *chefs kiss*

burn up, burn out by alcyonenight (T) 8.6k AND pockets full of stones by alcyonenight (T) 11.6k // ELEAZAR AU!!! baby's first eleazar fic and it ruined her. miserably. i loved both of these so much, wonderful reads truly (they both made me so sad)

get on your nerves (to get your attention) by acynthe (M) 3.9k // what better way to get to know a character than by reading him pine over one person for way too long? right? anyways this fic really set me up into understanding that haikaveh = watching ice melt in the arctic during winter..

Work engagement by gwendee (G) 3.6k // silly little boys in their silly little parties with their silly little plans.. the line that stuck with me was bringing their love to new heights because cyno was right.. it was funny..

and yet by luminvies (G) 11.8k // this fic was so poetic and eloquent to me it was a wonderful read and kaveh is so silly girlie pop in it HAHA. but really, it was a wonderful read and i loved how fleshed out kaveh felt despite this being written before he was released LMFAO

In a Language He Understands by Maeyari (G) 13.2k // this was so funny and Kaveh becoming a homewrecker is so insane whaat (totally not fake and not clickbait) that aside, it was a very light hearted read and i enjoyed it very much

what are we by lionkeychain (T) 5.1k // if i had to re route you to Kaveh being the silliest dude alive it's this one right here. i would send you here. he is so . i am so . about him. AHHHHHHHHHH. anyways, he's just a dude with a lot of love ykwim?

inertia by smallghosts (T) 3.6k // i think it's funny how al-haitham plays fetch with Kaveh in like 85% of fics (this one included) anyways the summary was so funny i just had to read it and in context it's even funnier to me. Kaveh you're so funny ily king ('being in love with you is gross.' me: HELPDKLNLEEE?GLD>SD>? literal definition of boom roasted).

first love, worst love by caniculeo (M) 11.6k // babe wake up. the circus is back in town. babe go back to sleep. the girlies broke up.. again.. anyways. had to take a laugh break when al-haitham hit on nilou. literally put my device down and had to catch my breath. then when kaveh pointed behind al-haitham. oh god. ALSO highly recommend the second fic in the series with cynonari. cyno i love u my funny king.

Burgeon by gloomyparfait (T) 8.2k // another hanahaki fic rye? really? YES. please i love irrationality. they're so chewable in this fic i love them dearly. i need to blend them. mince them up like beef tartare.

okay this is not an extensive list (def missed some good ones i've read) and i have more i want to consume (!!!) but i haven't gotten around to some of the longer ones just cause my attention span is bad these days. i'm very excited for some of my future reads and so perhaps there will be a part two because i am down in the trenches right now. regardless, i hope you enjoyed this list and now it's time for me to disappear again. bye bye

also if you've written a fic on this list and you would prefer for it to not be on this list/on tumblr, just lmk and i'd be more than happy to remove you!

[gizkasparadise]

hi! came here from ur ao3. Start a War has been my favorite fanfic for roughly 2 years now and I keep re-reading the perfection that it is. truly, thank you for letting us read it for free.

I had a question however. in the scene where she Cuts and is taken and Aleks rescues her, she asks him the classic what is infinite and he's heartbroken and responds w "never us". somehow I've never understood what he meant. could you please explain?

sorry if ur over it and I'm dredging it up, it's just been a lot on my mind and I was doing the dishes and thought of it 😂 feel free to ignore, if you wish.

once again, thank u for that art you've graced us with. I love it w all my heart. hope u have a great day :)

- ec 🐣

hello!! thank you for the kind note :D it's really awesome that folks are still reading and enjoying this fic that is about to be (SOB) 10 years old!!!

so im probably going to articulate this badly, but essentially how it plays out is that during this part of the fic, alina wants to die following the assassination of the lantsovs and she's tired of being immortal/unending (hence why she let the fjerdans take her hostage/build a pyre to burn her alive). darkling doesnt have the same hangups with immortality, nor does he ever really understand alina's, but he's terrified that she was almost killed

so darkling asks: “Tell me what I need to do to make you forget. And I’ll do it.” because her hang-ups/grief is putting her in danger and he's tired and frustrated over how attached she was to her mortal life

so alina responds with baghra's often-repeated question, because alina knows he was attached at least to his mother and she is trying to get him to understand her a little better: “What is infinite, Aleksander?”

and he replies the traditional answer: “The universe and the greed of men.”

and she adds on: "And us" because she's sick of being immortal and really nihilistic about how endless her existence looks when she has so much grief

& darkling is quick to correct her: “No,” and his voice breaks with an emotion he does not understand, “Not us.”

^ this is because he's really come face-to-face with alina almost dying for the first time, and he's realizing that they're both not untouchable/he could very easily be alone again if alina decides to exit their unending, codependent existence. the "emotion he does not understand" can be interpreted however the reader wants, but i was thinking of it as him being really afraid for the first time in a long, long time

hope that answers your question!! thank you for the message again :D