#because like. you can buy a smart phone for £70 and it's probably FINE

[yousaytomato]

Current phone: £200, has lasted 4 years

Phone I'm considering: £800, so logically will last 16 years

[koteosa]

here’s some modern au headcanons for the arcana ... it’s something I think about a lot

Asra

gamer memeing shitlord . he majored in minecraft you cannot convince me otherwise

plays A Lot of minecraft but also just enjoys any similar sort of game, sdv, animal crossing, etc. He’s really good at video games but he’s just fucking around . he likes to play online games and try his best to make everyone hate him in a really harmless sort of way . he heals the enemy spy . changes his display name and avatar to be exactly the same as someone else . tells people to go into the console and type unbindall

he plays games with his friends and he’s usually the top player so he just spends his time spoiling the shit out of his friends giving them good items carrying them through dungeons etc but not Julian, he tells Julian to dig straight down in minecraft . Julian doesn’t ever know what he’s doing in any video game so Asra trains him wrong on purpose, as a joke

anyway enough about video games (for now)

Asra lives in a van that he painted the exterior of himself, it was both a fun project and a very smug way to annoy people with this awful fucking hippie van strolling into town, eat shit

it’s decorated with crystals, furs, fairy lights, mason jars full of food For The Aesthetic, books, etc. It’s very cozy, cottagecore / bohemian and it’s ridiculously obvious that he’s into witchcraft. he just lets Faust explore because this isn’t real and I can pretend that a snake is exactly as well behaved as in a fantasy story

basically homeless by choice

drugs tw but I see him as the type to want to try anything and everything at least once so if he’s ever been offered A Drug (and he crashes parties for fun and for free food, so he’s got opportunities) he’ll try it Just To See, and this has resulted in some bad trips before, but Muriel saw him in the middle of one and then after he sobered up Muriel put his foot down and made Asra agree to only do these things as responsibly as possible, like, with supervision from a friend

still drugs tw but I also see Asra as a stoner but in the cbd edibles sort of way, a lot of this is because I headcanon Asra as having ADD (because I do and I want to project a little bit) so it helps him focus but also he just Likes It. the glove box of his car has like, chocolate/lollipop edibles stuff like that

goes between like super healthy elaborate meals with mushrooms and veggies and fresh meat and shit and then just eating nothing but cheez-its all day

style wise I see him as the type to wear a lot of tank tops, like, the loosest of tank tops so it hangs super low and long and you get some nice cleavage out of it, crystal necklaces, gold jewelry, pride pins/jewelry/etc (trans/nonbinary/bisexual flags), oversized hoodies with loud colorful patterns, joggers and other loose comfy pants, and either boots or slippers

he’s got like... the at home look that’s basically what I just described, and then the away from home look that’s got thirty layers and none of it makes sense and he just shows up in orange crocs With Patterned Socks and everyone who sees him just lets out the heaviest sigh

Asra getting home be like (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a layer of clothes) (takes off a l

He likes to go on long road trips completely at random and saves up money to go on more extensive trips like, out of the continent. It can be really hard to place him at any given time, especially because he’s extremely slow to respond to texts for a whole multitude of reasons. He just fucking vanishes sometimes and he doesn’t get that maybe people want to know where he is. He’s too solitary

He makes money either via street performances (magic, tarot readings, etc) or selling shit on etsy like handmade tarot decks, crystal necklaces, magic charms, etc. He Has Never Worked A Day In His Life and He Will Not Start Now

Responsibility? Don’t know her

People ask him really obnoxious questions sometimes and he makes outlandish lies to tell them for fun . Why do you live in a van? A house killed my parents

In the fall/winter he lives with Muriel or more to the point, he crashes on his couch for a really long time and Muriel’s landlord doesn’t need to know about it for rent purposes

Julian

he’s a highly paid doctor and your mother would love it if you’d marry him if not for the fact that he looks like he never left his teenage emo phase

PIERCINGS

There’s DEFINITELY at least one piercing on his d

he lives with Portia and Mazelinka and tries to handle all their expenses but Mazelinka won’t fucking let him

soundproofed his room but not because he’s a youtuber or anything but because he uh. y’know what I’m gonna let y’all figure this one out on your own

goes to like............. lgbt friendly bdsm clubs every now and then looking for someone to step on him and call him garbage it’s for his mental health you don’t understand

black turtlenecks . silver jewelry . distinguished but Edgy as well, black boots, winklepickers, doc martens, ohmygod this is my SHIT I’m giving him red plaid pants and a reversed cross necklace and a leather jacket that says some radical shit on the back and Lots of Rings . black jeans with tears in the knees and black eyeshadow, demonia boots, leather gloves, hhhhhhOHmy GOD

catch him at home in black leggings and a my chemical romance tshirt with holes in it . he wakes up in the morning with yesterday’s makeup and he just cleans it up a little and that’s good enough

fairly small bedroom because he’s usually never at home, but it’s still pretty clear what he’s into even if it’s not super decorated or elaborate, kind of just Default Room but with his stuff arranged throughout . band posters, black furniture, a bed that looks like a depressed vampire sleeps in it, a bookshelf but most of the books are scattered around his desk, bed, and the floor. there’s a taxidermy skull on display somewhere because it’s just so dramatic you gotta love it

plays a black electric violin

extremely out of tune with pop culture he still listens to 70-00s music and he doesn’t know what a minecraft is or why Asra keeps yelling CREEPER when he comes into the room nor why Portia yells back AW MAN

I googled it and he qualifies as a millennial but I still see him as such a fucking old man who doesn’t know how to use electronics

despite being a doctor he’s so unhealthy . he eats nothing but depression meals (or just, nothing) unless someone forces him to sit down and eat an actual meal . No Julian whiskey does not count for your daily water intake

Malak probably happened because Julian wouldn’t stop feeding every black bird he saw just for the aesthetic and that was like 17 years ago but they still show up at his window expecting almonds or whatever the fuck . he changes houses but they’re too smart . you try to be a cool gothic thespian with a raven that will pose on your arm ONE time when you’re a teenager and they just never stop coming

sad lonely no friends hasn’t been laid in six years because he’s too busy and no longer remembers how to form meaningful relationships. Portia keeps being like so I met this really hot (insert gender here) and like idk I think they’re into goth dudes............... just saying...................... and he’s like am I really so pathetic that I’m going to let my baby sister set up blind dates for me? Yes

would drive something very goth like a hearse or some shit if not for the fact that his family would make sure he ends up in a coffin in the back of it if he drove up in that shit . please . buy a normal fucking car . Julian . oh my god

he starts quoting melodramatic poetry at the slightest inconvenience . he is that “All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread. My cat stole my fucking garlic bread” meme

been arrested multiple times for general rowdiness but also for political activism . at this point Portia/Mazelinka will just sigh and pay his bail and they don’t even ask what he did this time . how does he still have a job? I wish I knew

theater kid

Muriel

lives in a rundown apartment in the shitty part of town because it’s all he can afford, it’s quiet, and no one will try to visit him (except Asra) because no one wants to go to THAT part of town . but no harm will likely ever befall him because he’s 6′10 and like three million pounds of raw muscle with battle scars like you gonna fuck with that? really?

even if he got robbed it wouldn’t matter because A) he doesn’t own anything B) Inanna will chase the thief away

depression man staying in his quiet rundown dark apartment distracting himself with idle hobbies and taking care of his dog to prevent the encroaching ennui from tearing him a new asshole

changes jobs frequently both because he never stands out therefore never gets taken on full time after the part time trial period, AND to protect himself from the horror of being known

works mostly things like construction, auto repair, dog sitting/walking/etc, woodworking, mostly hard labor but if he can convince granny to let a very scary but completely harmless man look after her bichon frise for the weekend then he’s pretty happy about that

in a similar manner, he orders everything online so cashiers/etc won’t start to recognize him. delivery workers leave everything outside his door and he just drags it inside after they leave like an itazura kitty coin bank

goes camping a lot because staying cooped up in his apartment is super bad for his mental health and he doesn’t like to take walks through the city for a multitude of reasons. he takes Inanna on walks through the woods instead

Asra is his only friend and that’s fine (it’s not fine)

convinced therapy doesn’t work and he wants nothing to do with it

doesn’t like using electronics and only keeps a few things around his house so Asra can use them when he’s around . Muriel has a phone (that Asra got for him) so he can text Asra, check the time, check the weather, google questions, and like, nothing else

pretty much only happy when something is about dogs. he wants to go to the pet store and look at the dogs but he needs Asra to go with him so Asra can distract the workers and Muriel can look at the puppies in peace

dresses in blacks, grays, greens, and browns for the most part, jacket with the hood up, tank tops, dark jeans with tears in them, brown boots with mud stains on them . functional, not particularly stylish, and if he’s going to be in public he doesn’t want to make it easy for anyone to see his face. at home it’s mostly no shirt + sweatpants/joggers/etc. doesn’t accessorize or put in any real effort. he doesn’t care what he looks like (because he’s convinced he’s not much to look at anyway)

lives that super eco friendly life like Asra does but it’s more that he just feels comfortable living like he’s always on a camping trip

he doesn’t want to eat junk like Asra does but if Asra shows up with mcdonalds then well he can’t really say no

the type who uses something until he absolutely cannot use it anymore instead of just buying a new one

has never been to a doctor, dentist, etc Ever. the most he can do is take Inanna to the vet because he loves her so much

drives a very old pickup truck with like, chipped paint and mud stains. he’d take better care of it if only anything in life mattered

didn’t go to school

Portia

I like to think that she took on a groundskeeping job at Nadia’s very expensive large house and they fell in love and now Nadia pays for everything and Portia just spends her time gardening, playing with Pepi, and like idk running a vlogging/gaming youtube channel

200 videos of Pepi on her youtube channel with 4 million views each bare minimum . takes random videos of cats where she has to audio edit it to shit so you can’t hear her high pitched squeals of delight

minecraft let’s play part 30 where her, Asra, Nadia, and Julian play together and it’s extremely chaotic because Asra and Portia decide to gang up on Julian who does NOT know what he’s doing, and then Nadia surprises them all by not being the bigger person and instead tricking Julian into some elaborate trap where he steps on a trapdoor and falls 15 blocks into some lava and he looks up and all he sees is Nadia’s smug fucking avatar looking down at him

nightcore. it’s just not FAST enough

wears sweaters with cats on them. generally dresses in warm colors + brown/green, it’s like a very soft cozy look that you could go camping in or just generally be outside and get grass stains and whatnot. cute, functional

likes to make Julian do things for her like drive her places etc because like, he will. he always will

really likes social gatherings with her friends; sleepovers, beach trips, sitting at mcdonalds and pouring all their fries into a pile etc. tries to get Julian to go with her but he’s Just So BUSY. she makes fun of him and makes him drive her to it, then manages to convince him to stay

cottagecore aesthetic . she just thinks it’s so cute to have the little mason jars and decorate everything with leaves and flowers and BEES and whatnot . would love to live in a little cottage with a farm if she could

her room has a big cat tree in it . green wallpaper with yellow flowers. pressed flowers into books, an extremely cozy bed, fairy lights, it’s very farmy but also there’s a lot of electronics. she’s got a lot of 00s games, like, right in that ps2 sweet spot

nicknames all of her pokemon

she spoils the ever loving shit out of Pepi. She’s got a little cat harness and they go on walks through the park together

I don’t have a lot to say about the other two I Am Sorry

[docholligay]

Follow Water Down

I have been wandering around in the woods since I was a small child. My family was not particularly well off, and from the ages of probably 3 to 16, the only vacations we ever took were camping trips. We left the house for the woods nearly every weekend. I live in Montana, and so when I say camping trips, I don’t mean we headed off to the KOA with a pool, I mean if I walked away from the campsite I was in the goddamn National Forest. I was genuinely happy with this arrangement, as I was a strange child who grew up to be a strange adult, and I enjoyed the quiet, the sense of exploration, the smell of the trees. 

I began leaving the campsite nearly from the word go, and by the time I was about 8 or so, I was very much off by myself in the woods for the majority of the day, which leads us to our post today. There are people who would call my mom grossly neglectful for having allowed me to do so much on my own at such a young age, and even she gets bashful when she talks about it, but I credit it with a lot of positives: 

I have an extremely good sense of direction

I have a strong core of self-sufficiency and am not easily overwhelmed by anxiety

I can be alone in the quiet with my thoughts

I am rough and tumble as HELL, owing to many many many falls down the sides of mountains, huge gashes in my legs, being stalked by a mountain lion, and one very memorable miscalculation that ended in me falling off a (small) waterfall

When I meet my fear, I can master it*

So what I am here to present to you today are very basic survival skills such as I would teach my own child, such as I was taught as a child. This is by no means comprehensive, and if you intend to get seriously into outdoor life, I recommend both doing far more research, and taking a a Wilderness First Aid class, which are frequently offered when it’s NOT Covid, and which I take about once every 3-5 years (I am due). This is a primer for those who are young, or new, or mostly want to experience the wilderness by reading about me doing it. 

Follow Water Down. 

I cannot remember how old I was when I learned this. It’s the sort of thing that is a part of my makeup, my mother must have told me when I was only a toddler and its stuck with me so hard that it’s one of the first things I tell people. 

If you are lost: 

Water will always lead you back to civilization eventually. Join up with the stream. See which way its going. Go that way. This is obviously not significantly helpful if you are lost in a flat desert plain but then again, I did start this by saying I was a child of the woods and not the desert. This seems like such an easy trick that people often ignore me when I say it, but it is the simplest thing for a child to remember. 

I can’t remember how old I was when I got lost in a tangle of hills and mountains in the Little Belts, where the trail faded but I kept going in my normal bullheaded way. But I was well and truly lost by the time it was about 3 pm, and in some ways I wish I had worn a step tracker back in those days because I am extremely certain I went miles and miles, as one does when they leave immediately after breakfast and don’t come back till dinner. I had no idea where I was, where the campsite was, or what direction I should be going. 

I was not thrilled. 

But I was not a kid who sat down and cried, in that I had smaller concerns before, and so could easily grow to meet the larger ones. I simply walked down the mountain, knowing a valley was more likely to have a stream I could easily join. Lo and behold, there in that little valley was a snowmelt creek, and I followed it downstream, knowing eventually there would be a house, or a campground, or something. In a twist of glorious good luck, it actually led me back toward where the campsite was, and as I began to recognize things, I easily clipped into our campsite long before any sign of trouble. 

Follow Water Down. If you aren’t near a stream, head for the nearest valley, and follow the valley. This will generally lead you to water. People will tell you to stay put and that is WAY smarter than wandering aimlessly in circles, which is why I say to follow something. You think you won’t go in circles, but you will. By following a streambed, not only are you doubtlessly heading back to civilization on a long enough timeline, but you keep yourself from doing that. 

Your Pack: 

Before you go out for the day, you should have a simple day pack. Mine is an Osprey Hikelite 18, but I hike all the time, and you don’t need something that technical. A plain ol Jansport will work as long as it fits you well. I do however, really approve of and recommend a waist clip. I also think a pocket for a water bottle on the outside is really useful, but you’re not going to fucking die if you have to take off your pack to get to your water bottle. I just find it takes up space I don’t want. 

Gear:

More important than your pack itself is what you have in it. Again, this is according to people named Doc, who are me. This is stuff I always take with me when I am by myself, on a trail where it would be realistic to assume I would not see someone else for hours. This is like 95% of Montana trails, or any time that I am off trail. 

Compass. You can get fancy, pretty compasses, but a lot of times they lack the actual essentials you need. I like this guy, which is well made, can be clipped to you backpack easily, and is inexpensive. I don’t have the time or space to really try to teach you how to use a compass, but here’s a really good simple primer from the American Hiking Society. 

Paper Map. I sometimes break this one, admittedly, but I shouldn’t. Having a paper map of the area is always a really smart practice, and used in combination with the compass, can help you get unlost quickly, or at the very least give you an idea of how close to any given outpost you are. 

Water Bottle. Please don’t tell me you were going to attempt to leave without this. I have no preferences on one, shockingly, and I’m being serious. I’ve been given to use an old disposable one, who gives a shit. 

Water Filter. Now THIS I did not have as a child, because my parents didn’t know any better, but if I follow in the grand tradition of my people and release my child into the mountains, I will give them one for certain. I knew what kind of water to look for if one was going to drink from a stream, and I did so, which probably explains why I am not susceptible to ~tummy upsets~ to this day. However, it would have been smarter for me to have one of these. I like LifeStraw but Sawyer makes a perfectly good one. Look for lightweight, it’s a day pack, kids. 

Knife. I have many many feelings about knives, which would require its own post, but this is fairly essential for being out and about. This is not a thing I would necessarily cheap out on, though there are fine options at most price points. This is my knife:

The Gerber Propel AO. The serrated and straight blade edge means there’s a lot of options for use as a tool, I find the blade to be strong and hold an edge well. Most American-made Gerbers (be sure and check, as they have a much shittier Chinese-made division) are incredibly well made knives. Leatherman multi-tools and Swiss Army Knives are, if you ask people named Doc who are me, a waste of weight and size, but if I were to buy a Leatherman, it would be a Free K2X. I would not buy a Swiss Army Knife. 

A jacket/fleece/pullover. Listen, i am the last one who wants to carry this shit but if you get lost overnight (as has never happened to me, kinehara.) you are going to want it. Read up on what the lowest temperatures are, and rate it to that. Depending on what mountain you are in, this is going to vary widely. And for the love of god, wear pants. I know, I know, it’s in the 70s and you’re hoooooooot but seriously, you’ll be less likely to injure yourself and you won’t fucking freeze. 

Flashlight/headlamp. 

There are fancy firestarters, but honestly I just throw in a bic. 

Food! Clif bars are great for this, lightweight, high calorie, keep well. this is in addition to your sandwich or whatever you’re packing for planned eating. 

Sunscreen/bug spray. Don’t be stupid. 

Whistle. Three sharp shot blasts is the easy and international sign for help. 

FIRST AID KIT this has its own thing. A first aid kit can be very basic to very intense. Our group first aid kit is more intense, but when I’m stuffing a day pack, I want stuff that’s light. 

Ibuprofen

Bandages

Gauze

Leukotape

wound wipes/antibac

Imodium, benedryl, caffeine

Oxycontin. This is leftover from long ago and basically exists in case I break my leg and have to drag myself out of there, or, as we like to say, a Worst Case Scenario. 

That’s it! It essentially fits in a bento box. 

You will want to be wearing a sunhat of some sort, sunglasses at hand, and a watch. Not a smart watch, a watch watch. It’s good to know what time it is, better to know that after your phone dies. Attach bear bells to your pack, or your shoe, or something. You do not want to surprise a bear, that is how people die. 

You may notice that I do not have a phone, external battery, GPS tracker or anything like that listed. GPS trackers are not a bad idea if you want to invest the money in backcountry--my wife has one--but I never have and I do not consider them essential. Phones and external batteries are not useful to me, and in the places I go there’s often not service. If there IS service, I find I’m more irritated than not by the people with me, who often can’t pull their faces out of telling their audience how much of a life they have to actually have one. Be alone with your fucking thoughts for once. 

Which leads me to my next thing: DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES TO HIKE OH MY GOD. Being able to hear what’s going on around you is key to safety, and also to allowing you to get your bearings. If you are listening to music or something, you are far more likely to sneak up on something, or allow it to sneak up on you. Don’t do it. It’s a terrible idea. 

Should I bring bear spray? This is an excellent question! We have ample bear spray, and I often wear it but I just as often wear Montana Bear Spray (a gun). It’s easier to practice with a gun, I feel more sure of how to use it, and I’m comfortable around it. That being said, this is not the story for most of America, and I understand that. So make sure you are VERY familiar with how to use your bear spray. 

I suppose this went off the rails into supplies more than “tips for survival” but honestly I would rather help you all AVOID trouble than help you out of it. It’s easier to pack clif bars than set a rabbit snare, and its easier to not get lost than it is to build shelter. Also, this is already at 2,000 words, so if you have a SPECIFIC question, let me know! 

*Apologies to Phillip Pullman, but if I were going to get anything from HDM tattooed on me, this sentiment would be it, the only problem being the actual line is “You ent afraid are you?” “Not yet. When I am, I shall master the fear.” which doesn’t look as good but damn has that resonated with me since I read it.

[barnes-belle]

Beauty and the Barnes (5)

FANDOM - MARVEL MCU

PAIRING - Bucky X Reader

WARNINGS - Lots of Smut, Light Hints of Non/Dub-Con, Prostitution, Swearing, Dark Bucky. (I can’t stress enough that this is kinda dark, Buckys an asshole and the kind of behavior that goes on in this fic is in no way acceptable in the real world)

When your father falls deathly ill you fall into a lifestyle you would have never predicted for yourself. Selling your body as a high-class escort isn’t ideal but it’s the only way to find the money you need to help your father, until your first client offers you another way.

Bucky’s mean, coarse and gets a kick out of watching you squirm but he is willing to help your father. All you have to do is sign yourself over to The Winter Soldier, body and soul.

Trapped in The Avengers compound, serving as a PA to a man who’s an absolute beast you find yourself wondering if there’s such a thing as a happy ending?

Masterlist

Chapter Five

“I’ve been on hold for an hour! He’s a patient, how hard is it to put me through to a patient!” You snapped.

 You had been trying all day to get a hold of your father but it was like some kind of impossible task. After being passed around to three different departments, several different nurses and one orderly you had been put through to a very nice elderly man who was not your father but was so happy someone had called to speak to him that you had ended up talking to him for a whole hour and promising you’d call again soon. You had then finally been given a separate number for the patient line and were still on hold.

“No, no don’t put me back on hold!” You hurriedly begged in vain.

 You groaned as the repetitive notes of the chirpy hold music played.

 “Excuse me, can you sign here?” The delivery man asked, again.

 You mouthed an apology and signed the screen quickly and balancing the phone between your shoulder and ear picked up the food delivery you’d had brought in. There was a communal kitchen as well as a small kitchenette in each room and after asking around you discovered Bucky preferred to use his own. With a little help from Friday you brought up Bucky’s order history and managed to construct a shopping list from it. Your tablet beeped with a notification from the laundry department in the basement, asking you to come pick up Bucky’s laundry and you whined.

 You were exhausted. It was only mid morning and you were half dead on your feet. You managed to get the shopping put away and ran down to the laundry, still listening to the awful hold music. Armed with piles of carefully wrapped dry-cleaning you managed to get into the elevator and sunk against the wall, smiling politely at the man sharing the elevator.

 “Do you need some help?” He whispered.

 “I can manage, thank you though.” You shook your head and sighed.

 “Are you sure? It’s just, you’re limping.” He pointed out.

 Your face suddenly felt very warm.

 “It’s just the heels.” You lied.

 You couldn’t exactly admit you were walking funny because your super soldier boss had bent you over and fucked you that morning.

 “Ah. Well if it’s any consolation, I think you look amazing in them.” He grinned, looking at your legs.

 “As a matter of fact, your approval has made the pain incredibly bearable.” You said sarcastically.

 “Well, I’m glad I can help. Let me know if you change your mind about accepting some help.” He said, winking and slipping out of the elevator doors as the whooshed open.

 You kind of wished you had actually admitted why you were really limping. You got out of the elevator after him, hoping to make a quick run for the corridor.

 “I’m Ben” He told you.

 “Hi Ben, bye Ben.”

 You would have felt a lot more victorious about your escape if you weren’t still on hold. To contend with the practically permanent ache between your legs, you now had a crick in your neck. You had to use your elbow and a lot of awkward leaning to get the door to Bucky’s room open.

 “Oh thank god you’re here!” You exclaimed when you saw him standing in the living room.

 “Why?” He asked, looking stricken.

 “I have your clothes but I’m not allowed in your room so here.” You said, flinging them down on the couch.

 You straightened your back with a groan.

 “Who are you on the phone to?” He asked, tilting his head to listen to the music with a confused look.

 “The clinic, I’m trying to speak to my father, I’ve been trying all day. I have to go pick up and fill out the requisition forms for some kind of rifle you asked for? I don’t know. Bye.” You told him with a friendly wave and rushed back out of the door.

 He stared after you for at least five minutes before he finally moved.

 “Friday, where’s Stark? I need a favour from him.”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Sometime after you’d eaten lunch, someone had finally taken you off of hold to tell you that your dad was with his doctors and you should phone back in a couple of hours. After you hung up you banged your head against the desk a couple of dozen times. You had been assigned a small, modest office. It had a desk, a chair, a filing cabinet and a window and that was it.

 “Friday?”

 “Yes Miss?”

 “Do I really have to fill out all these forms for a rifle? Can’t I just go buy it myself?” You grumbled.

 “It’s a 70 thousand dollar piece of weaponry.” She informed you.

 “What? Why? Why does he need a 70 thousand dollar rifle?” You yelped.

 “I believe he lost the last one.”

 “HOW?”

 “Got knocked out of my hands during a fight with Hydra operatives in the Balkans last month. Didn’t have time to go back for it, was busy trying not to get blown up. Well, actually I was busy trying to stop Steve getting himself blown up.” Bucky answered, opening your office door.

 “Oh. Well that’s fair… Captain America probably costs a little more to replace.” You said sheepishly.

 “This room is depressing.” He noted, looking around.

 “Well, It’s an office not The Magic Kingdom.” You told him.

 “You like it like this?” He asked derisively.

 “No, but I haven’t exactly had time to redecorate. Besides it’s fine, I’ll add some personal effects later.” You said, looking around.

 “Give me your tablet.” He demanded.

 You handed it over nervously and he immediately started fiddling with it. There was a ringing sound coming from it when he handed it back and you looked at the screen with a frown before the ringing stopped and suddenly you were looking at your father face.

 “Dad?”

 “Sweetheart! Hello! *cough* Can you hear me?” He shouted.

 “Dad, yes! I can hear you! Are you ok?” You asked frantically.

 Bucky smiled softly at the way you brightened straight away, gazing down at the screen with concentration.

 “I’m just fine. You were right, this is a wonderful place. They are taking such good care of me. Do thank your bosses for this won’t you?”

 You looked up to do exactly that but Bucky had already slipped away.

 “I will daddy, I will. Tell me everything.” You demanded.

 “Well they have me on *Cough* this new breathing apparatus.” He said, holding up the oxygen mask to the camera.

 “Are they nice? Are they smart?” You demanded.

 “Very nice, just lovely. Very smart, they know lots of big words.” He assured.

 “You’re coughing less.” You noted.

 “Yes, they gave me new medication. *cough*. It helps with the symptoms.” He said.

 “Dad, how are we talking? You don’t have a tablet, you don’t even have a cellphone.”

 “It was delivered a few minutes ago, with very clear instructions on how to turn it on. I thought you sent it.” He said excitedly.

 “No… no, it wasn’t me.” You said, the corners of your lips turning up as you realised what had happened.

 “Well tell me *cough* about this new job.”

 “It’s… hard work. But I think I like it, it’s not as difficult as I thought it would be.” You admitted with a grin.

 “Should you be calling? Are you *cough* at work right now?” He asked with concern.

 You waved a form at him.

 “I’m working, don’t worry.” You laughed.

 “Good, good girl. Well don’t *cough* be letting me distract you. I’ll still be here when you get home. I even know how to charge this contraption, the instructions were *cough* very helpful!” He said cheerfully.

 “Ok, well I’ll call tonight ok? Oh and there a man in room 4a, very nice man. His name is Donald Beaton, go say hello.”

 “I will sweetheart, goodbye. I love you.”

 “I love you too daddy.” You said, blowing him a kiss and hanging up.

 You gently placed the tablet down on your desk and took a deep, shuddering inhale before you were springing up and running out of the door. Your heels clacked against the floor, pain forgotten as you raced through the compound. You found Bucky about the enter the gym.

 “Bucky!” You called.

 He turned around to look at you and you pulled to a stop in front of him , breathing heavily. He raised a quizzical eyebrow you. He tensed up as you put your hand on his shoulder .

 “Thank you.” You said firmly, looking deep into his eyes.

 He nodded shakily and licked his lips, finding them suddenly dry. When you leaned up to press a kiss to his cheek all the tension disappeared under your touch as he practically melted into you. When you pulled away he nearly stumbled and when you walked away, throwing one last smile over your shoulder at him he just stared after you, awestruck. When you turned the corner, out of sight he brushed his fingers across his cheek and walked backwards, away from the gym.

 “Isn’t Bucky meeting us?” Sam asked.

 “Guess he’s late.” Steve shrugged, setting up the punchbag.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 You balanced a bag of Chinese takeout against your hip and a locked case with a 70 thousand dollar rifle in your arms as you dragged your very very tired self back to your office. You still had a mountain of forms to fill in so you were planning on having a working dinner. You dropped the stupid rifle haphazardly on your desk and very carefully placed the bag of food next to it.

 “Well I cam to see if you wanted dinner, looks like you already have that covered.”

 You looked up in alarm at Ben who was leaning against the windowsill, smirking at you.

 “Do you have an appointment?” You asked.

 “For dinner?”

 “To be in my office.” You snapped.

 “Do I need one?”

 “Yes…”

 “Can’t make an exception, just for me?” He asked with what you assumed was supposed to be a charming grin.

 “Nope.”

 “How about grabbing some dinner with me? I’ll even let you wear flats.” He asked, stepping forwards.

 “Oh will you? How kind.” You said, rolling your eyes.

 “So, shall we?” He asked.

 “No.” You said flatly.

 “No what?” He asked, smiling away.

 “No, we shan’t.” You clarified.

 “Ok… I can meet you in the somewhere if you like?” He offered.

 “Just because you can it doesn’t mean you should.” You said.

 “I’m confused.” Ben said, frowning quizzically at you.

 “Perpetually I bet. I don’t want to have dinner with you, now or in the future, but thank you for asking.” You said politely as you could be bothered.

 “Well how about coffee?” He tried.

 “I’m not interested.” You told him straight.

 “Breakfast?” He pushed.

 “Still a no.”

 “Are you seeing someone?” He enquired.

 “No.”

 Unbeknown to the two of you, this was the point when Bucky approached your office door and paused, hearing your voices.

 “Then why not have a drink with me?” He tried.

 “Because I don’t want to.” You informed him, again.

 “I bet I can change your mind.” He smirked.

 “You can’t.” You stated.

 “Give me a chance.” He asked, growing irritated.

 “Nope.”

 “Well now you’re just being rude.” He admonished.

 “And you’re being desperate.” You retorted.

 “Listen, you’re pretty and you’re new around here so maybe you don’t get how it works. If a man, especially one with a much higher position than you is nice enough to ask you to dinner, it’s polite to accept.” He snapped.

 “And I really shouldn’t be rude should I? it’s unbecoming.” You said with a chastised expression.

 “Exactly.” He said, pleased he’d appeared to get through to you.

 Bucky snarled lowly and put his hand on the door handle when your saccharine sweet voice stopped him.

 “Alright then. Thank you so very much for your generous and gallant offer good sir but I am afraid I must politely decline on account of the fact that I simply do not want to accept.” You said.

 “Why the hell not?” He demanded.

 “Sarcasm seems to go over your head and no is not a word you comprehend, that gives you low intelligence points. You’re misogynistic, pushy and kind of creepy so charisma points are low as well. You’d need to be absolutely drop dead gorgeous to counteract both of those things enough for me to want to spend time with you and the fact that I have said no should tell you all you need to know there.” You listed off.

 He gaped at you. Outside, Bucky smirked.

 “Whew, I’m pretty winded. You have a lot of flaws to list, you should work on that.” You said, waving him towards the door.

 “Stuck up bitch.” He muttered under his breath, storming out of the office.

 He didn’t see Bucky, concealed in a shadow as he scurried away. Bucky resisted the urge to step out of the shadows and teach the sleaze a lesson, you’d already done that. He smirked again as he remembered the way you’d cut the man down with your words. He moved back towards your office, desperate to see if you would accept his offer of company.

 That was when you finally noticed the huge bouquet of red roses on your desk in a crystal vase. You looked around for a card, but there wasn’t one. You didn’t want Ben’s company and you certainly didn’t want his flowers. Scoffing at them, you swept them off the desk and straight into the bin. You didn’t see the card that had fallen off the desk and landed under it and you didn’t see Bucky Barnes stood in the open doorway behind you with a wounded expression.

 By the time you turned around to slam your office door closed, there was no one there and Bucky was halfway down the corridor wondering why your rejection of his affection was making his chest hurt so badly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Belle: *Is nice to Bucky* Bucky: *Goes soft* Belle: *Is mean to someone else* Bucky: *Gets hard* 

@spnqueen02 @nogardsoahk @chipilerendi   @youwerespared @jessieray98@nochampagnesocialist@scarlettswxtch@dropthepizza346 @jsmith509 @musingpredilection

[eldritchsurveys]

667.

1. If you found a baby turtle on the side of the road, would you pick it up and keep it? >> If I found a baby of any species on the side of the road, I’m not going to pick it up and keep it, I’m going to call the appropriate authorities and let them handle it. The fuck am I doing with a baby anything? 2. Did you and your mum ever have a big fight that caused you to move out? >> --- 3. Has the last person you kissed ever been to your house? >> --- 4. Have you had a good day today or was yesterday better? >> It was all right. At least the Sun was out a bit, and I managed to go out for once. Mostly I’m glad to be back in my bed now, lol. 5. Do you have any plans for the upcoming weekend? >> No.

6. How about you, do you have a bf/gf? >> Hm. 7. Could you date someone very attractive, but who thought they were better than everyone else? >> I don’t date, period, but I also wouldn’t hang out with someone who had a superiority complex. 8. So do you have a best friend? >> No. 9. What would you do if your best friend kissed the last person you kissed? >> --- 10. Do you dislike anyone? >> Not really. There are people I don’t really want to be around, of course, but I can’t think of anyone specific that I’m like “fuck that guy in particular” about except for people that have unapologetically hurt me (in which case it’s less “I dislike you” and more “I don’t even want to acknowledge your existence”). 11. Did you message your best friend today? >> --- 12. Do you think you will be in a relationship two months from now? >> I don’t see why not. 13. Do you always feel like you’re making mistakes? >> Yeah, because I have Trauma Brain. But I also know that I don’t make any more mistakes than the average person and most of my mistakes are easily fixed. 14. How do you feel about your hair right now? >> I’m going to need to buzz it again soon. 15. Does anybody have a tattoo with your name on it? >> Maybe someone has a tattoo of my name, because my name doesn’t just belong to me. But no one has a tattoo of my name that is actually about me. 16. Who did you last see shirtless? >> A couple of characters on Carnivale (before one of them got hanged with the word “HARLOT” carved into her forehead, of course. this is Carnivale after all). 17. How would you feel if you got the person you liked? >> --- 18. Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months without cheating? >> *sigh* 19. Do you like to make the first move? >> The first move to what? 20. Do you think you will ever be married? >> I am married. 21. Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? >> Sure. 22. Is it possible to be single and happy? >> Duh? 23. Was the first person you talked to today male or female? >> The first person I spoke to was the bartender at Gardella’s, who is female. 24. Do you remember who you liked on New Year’s? >> --- 25. Are you a morning person or a night person? I’m barely a person. <-- mood 26. Could you go the rest of your life without drinking alcohol? >> Whether I “can” or not is irrelevant because I don’t fucking want to. 27. Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough? >> Sure. 28. Is there anyone who likes you? >> --- 29. If the last person you kissed saw you kissing someone else, would they be mad? >> --- 30. Do you understand football? >> I understand American football. I don’t know anything about soccer football except the obvious bits. 31. What’s the first thing you heard this morning? >> I don’t know. 32. Who last called you beautiful? >> I don’t know. 33. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? >> No. 34. How many kids do you want when you get older? >> --- 35. Are you the type of person who has a new boyfriend/girlfriend every week? >> Of course not. 36. Ever been called a jerk/bitch? >> Yep. 37. Do you have feelings for anyone? >> Bold of you to assume I have feelings-- 38. If you fell pregnant to the last person you kissed, what would you think? >> Falling while pregnant is dangerous, oof-- 39. What’s your full name? >> *eldritch screeching* 40. Are you young or old? >> Depends on your perspective -- to a child I’m old, to a middle-aged person I’m young, etc. 41. What’s the gender? >> Oh, the gender outside is frightful... 42. How’s your heart been lately? >> You know. Beating and such. 43. Why aren’t you in bed? >> I am, though. 44. Did you do laundry today? >> No. 45. What kind of computer do you have? >> I have an MSI Leopard Pro and a Lenovo Ideapad. 46. Are there always other fish in the sea? >> Not if you overfish. 47. What can your tongue do? >> You know. Lick stuff. Form phonemes. Get chemical burns when I eat too many sour candies in a row. 48. What do you think your mum does when she goes out? >> --- 49. Do chickens have feelings? >> I don’t know anything about chicken neurology/psychology. 50. Do you think the body is the most beautiful thing that was ever made? >> No. 51. So how are you feeling today? >> Neutral. 52. Where is your sister right now? >> --- 53. Name five things you did today? >> Took a bus, drank at a bar, briefly logged into ESO, watched an episode of Carnivale, ate mac n’ cheese with bacon. 54. What kind of phone do you have? >> Moto g6. 55. What are you listening to? >> Nothing. 56. What do you smell like? >> A bit like my roll-on oil and a bit like my whipped shea butter. Mostly just like... clean skin or whatever. 57. What colour are your eyes? >> Dark brown. 58. Have you ever done a Chinese fire drill? >> No. 59. Do you know someone named Betsy? >> No. 60. What colour is your mum’s hair? >> --- 61. Do you have a dog? Breed? Name? >> No. 62. Do you remember singing any songs as a kid? >> I mean, yeah? 63. Are you married? >> Yes. 64. When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings? >> --- 65. Do you play an instrument? >> No. 66. Do you like fire? >> Sure, fire is nice. In moderation. 67. Are you allergic to anything? >> No. 68. Have you ever been to a spa? >> I’ve been to a nail spa because Sparrow works at one. I’ve also been to the Aveda spa that she did her training in years ago. 69. Do you miss someone? >> No. 70. Views on premarital sex? >> I have no views on it. I really can’t fathom having an opinion on whomst other people fuck and when. 71. What is a noise that you cannot stand? >> Face sounds. Any of them. Eating, breathing, sniffling, lip-licking, eugh. Stay away. (Sometimes I can hear myself blinking and I want to rip my eyelids off. It’s bad.) 72. Do you know how to do a cartwheel? >> Yeah. 73. What is the most you are willing to spend on a pair of sunglasses? >> Not much. 74. Does your mum vacuum early in the morning while you’re asleep? >> --- 75. Do you shower naked? >> Do I look like Tobias Funke to you? 76. Does wearing glasses really make people look smart? >> That’s not my interpretation. People with glasses just look like people with glasses. 77. Are you ADD or ADHD? >> No. 78. Do your band-aids have cartoons on them? >> I FUCKING WISH. I was so mad when I needed band-aids for my feet and none of the ones in the size I needed came in cartoon print. The only ones with fun designs were little baby band-aids. I think as an adult I should be able to buy whatever the fuck kind of band-aids I want, including ones with Stitch on them. Fuck you. 79. Have you ever kissed someone you shouldn’t have? >> Probably. 80. In one word, how would you define yourself? >> I wouldn’t. 81. Tell me about a dream you had recently? >> I can’t, I can never remember them anymore. I get vague wispy impressions upon waking, and then even those disappear after a few minutes. I feel disconnected from dream!Mordred and I’m so curious at what it’s been up to. 82. Who’s the funniest drunk person you know? >> --- 83. How did you feel when you woke up? >> Fine, I guess. 84. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning? >> I don’t know, probably something related to Sparrow knocking around as she got ready for work, because that’s my first sensory memory upon awakening. 85. Name something great that happened on Friday? >> It’s Thursday, ask me on Saturday. 86. When was the last time you saw your father? >> --- 87. Do you wish someone would call or text you right now? >> No. 88. Have you ever been kissed by a person whose name starts with J? >> Yeah. 89. Do you crack your knuckles? >> Yeah. 90. What were you doing twenty minutes ago? >> Probably still this survey, since it’s so long. 91. You’re thinking about someone, aren’t you? >> No. 92. Have you held hands with anyone in the past twenty-four hours? >> No. 93. What would you do if your partner still kept pictures of their ex? >> Nothing? That doesn’t affect me. 94. What if your partner went through your cellphone? >> I wouldn’t be with someone that went through my belongings without my express permission. 95. What if your partner was flirting with another girl/boy? >> I’d be glad for her. I hope she gets whatever she’s looking for from that interaction. 96. Ever liked someone you thought you didn’t stand a chance with? >> --- 97. You want someone/something? >> Not really. 98. Is there really a difference between Coke and Pepsi? >> Yeah, which is why many people have a preference. 99. Is there any emotion you’re trying to avoid right now? >> No. 100. Are there any mistakes with your recent ex you wish you could have changed? >> I’m pretty sure the entire situation in itself was a mistake, and it was changed, by us ending up having no contact with each other. 101. Has anyone ever been with you while you were throwing up? >> I mean, sure. 102. Background on your computer? >> Right now it’s a wallpaper with a scene from the movie Interstellar. (My desktop wallpaper is on a shuffle timer.) 103. Have you cried recently? >> Like, within the last week, probably. 104. Who has hurt you the most? >> I don’t know. 105. Are you happy with where you are relationship-wise now? >> Sure. 106. What language do you want to learn? >> --- 107. Your ex’s car breaks down and they ask you for a lift. Your response? >> I mean, I don’t drive, dude. Also, we live in wildly different parts of the country. This is just so many layers of implausible. 108. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex? >> ---

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHAT KATE SAW IN YOUR IDENTITY SMALL

If you just start doing stuff for them, many will be too busy to shoo you away. The 32 year old. I don't even try to predict it. The best odds are in niche markets. So why not go after corruption? Investors' opinions are explicitly tested: startups come to them for funding. Some believe only business people can do this—that hackers can implement software, but not to tell them everything either.1 If you really think you have a chance of going public. I've learned that some suits are smarter than others.2 Because of Y Combinator's position at the extreme end of the scale at least in technology. Even when you find genuinely good things to copy, there's another kind of thinking, when you're starting something new, that requires complete quiet. Most adults looking at art worry that if you take a vote.3

I haven't prepared.4 If we were talking about the taste of apples in a dish made of equal parts apples and jalapeno peppers. To most hackers, getting investors seems like a stinker to me. That depends on how ambitious you feel. The downside is that none are especially good. However, for better or worse it looks as if Europe will in a few decades speak a single language. We used to show people how to build real, working stores. That would have led to disaster, because our software was easy to use.5 Twitter is such a big deal.6 At the top schools, I'd guess as many as a quarter of the CS majors could make it as startup founders if they wanted.

Starting a startup is always calculating in the back of every art student's mind. The successful ones therefore make the first version as simple as possible. It seemed obvious that beauty, for example, are now en route to the Bay Area to find investors. I couldn't imagine why there should be any lower limit for the age of startup founders.7 When an investor maltreats a founder now, it probably has a few leaves stuck in the landing gear from those trees it barely cleared at the end of that year we had about 70 users. We also thought we'd be able to improve the odds. Even genuinely smart people by their ability to say things like I don't know exactly what's suppressing all the startups we've funded. If you actually want to compress the gap between rich and poor, you have to have a silicon valley in Germany, because you couldn't establish the level of university you'd need as a seed. A typical VC fund is now hundreds of millions of dollars.8 For most of college I was a Lisp hacker, I come from the tradition of rapid prototyping. If two companies have the same revenues, it's the one with fewer employees that's more impressive, not less.

No matter who you pick, they'll find faces engaging—practically by definition: face recognition is in our DNA. No matter who you pick, they'll find faces engaging—practically by definition: face recognition is in our DNA. It's pseudo-hip. And they may be, but they want to do it, you'll just get a lot of time and money to do it: give money to the poor, or they could become irrelevant. If a startup gets into real trouble, instead of only in the most hospitable environments. What's the equivalent for startups? Investors mainly contribute money, which in principle is the same no matter what the source. Few if any colleges have classes about startups. So the language is likely to have seemed an extremely risky bet at first, and that probably made a difference. I spent a lot of startups involve someone moving. They had, I think, is that it frees artists to try to create a silicon valley in Germany, because you couldn't establish the level of university you'd need as a seed.9

Investors like to co-invest.10 The number one question people ask is how many employees you have. VCs want to invest large amounts. Lisp. I got in reply what was then the party line should be to figure out what. I can predict quite well what sort of people, each with their own opinion; on what grounds can you prefer one to another? Is that so bad? I want to free the idea of taking this rival firm's rejects.11 The problem here is not wealth, but corruption.12 Back in 1998 our CFO tried to talk me into it. I can pretend it wasn't merely a rhetorical one.

So a software startup in Sweden is still at a disadvantage relative to one in the US this is another rule that isn't very strictly enforced. I'm not even sure what the list is, because we, ah, skipped all that. They just smelled wrong.13 Can you protect yourself against obsolete beliefs? Perhaps even more valuable: it's hard to switch from that to a product company. I'm not too worried yet.14 I decided not to, because that's implicit in making something customers want is to get a prototype in front of computers, and I don't understand x well enough. Most people who buy SUVs do it to seem manly, not to drive off-road.15 What, besides clothes and toiletries, do you make a point of packing? When I get asked in interviews to predict the future, I always have to struggle to come up with a remotely plausible story, you can compose expressions however you want. The most overreaching employee agreement I've seen so far is not very long. Watch closely how power is exercised, and demand an account of how decisions are made.

Notes

University Press, 1973, p. People seeking some single thing called wisdom have been about 2,000 sestertii apiece for slaves learned in the usual way to put it would destroy them. They overshot the available RAM somewhat, causing much inconvenient disk swapping, but I have no idea what they claim was the last round of funding.

Investors are fine with funding nerds.

You're not seeing fragmentation unless you want to get elected with a faulty knowledge of human nature is certainly part of the fatal pinch where your existing investors help you in? But the margins are greater on products.

A scientist isn't committed to rejecting it. I've observed; but as a phone that is exactly my point. Then it's up to two more investors. Vii.

Statistical Spam Filter Works for Me. And since there are certain qualities that help in deciding between success and failure, just that if colleges want to pound that message home.

If you wanted to go sell the product ASAP before wasting time building it.

Then Josh Wilson came in to pick your brains. Ian Hogarth suggests a way to explain it would have undesirable side effects. Anyone can broadcast a high school, the partners discriminate against deals that come to them rather than doing a small amount of stock the VCs I encountered when we say it's ipso facto right to buy corporate bonds to market faster; the Reagan administration's comparatively sympathetic attitude toward takeovers; the critical path that they don't want to design these, and not incompatible answers: a to make a brief entry listing the gaps and anomalies.

In 1800 an empty room, and that they don't make their money if they become so embedded that they are by ways that have bad ideas is to carry a beeper?

But scholars seem to have too few customers even if they don't, working twice as much income. These were the case.

Because the title associate has gotten a bad reputation, a market for its shares will inevitably arise.

There are simply no outside forces pushing high school you're led to believe is that promising ideas are not very well connected. The situation is analogous to the customer: you post a sign saying this is also the 11% most susceptible to charisma. Nothing annoys VCs more than one who passes. And while we can easily imagine.

Hodges, Richard. This is similar to over-hiring in that sense, but some do.

One reason I stuck with such abandon. In the late Latin tripalium, a copy of K R, and that often doesn't know its own. You have to. No one seems to be good?

Spices are also the golden age of economic equality in the mid 20th century was also the golden age of economic inequality in the message.

Together these were the impressive ones.

Thanks to Michael Seibel, Steve Melendez, Paul Buchheit, Greg Mcadoo, Harj Taggar, and Ron Conway for smelling so good.

[purrincesscatitude]

i would kill for a promptfic where adam Overworks himself at school (not even during finals) and ends up like crashing hard and calling ronan and just crying and ronan races up there

Well, lucky for all of us, I don’t require sacrifices in order to fulfill prompts!! (although if you happen to blow some dandelion fluffs into the breeze with a wish for good fortune for me, I wouldn’t mind it that much.)

#######

Adam should have known, when his professor hands him his paper with a sneer, that it isn’t going to be good. He takes one look at the back page, swallows, and shoves the paper as deep into his backpack as it’ll go.

Students stagger out of class, flipping through their graded essays with increasingly hopeless expressions. Adam hurries past them all, phone shaking in his hands as he presses “call.”

He spent hours on this 10-page history paper. He met with the professor, he used 5 more sources than was required, he went to the writing center, he wrote and edited and rewrote and edited some more into the earliest hours of the morning days before it was even due. He did everything right. Everything you’re supposed to do. And yet…

“He gave me a 70%,” Adam says before Ronan can even say “hello” (or, “the fuck is up, shithead.” Same difference.)

“That fucker,” Ronan says, static warping his deep, rich voice into something robotic and cold. Adam is a few dropped calls away from buying a smartphone just so he can hear the real Ronan when they talk on the phone instead of this shitty imitation.  

Adam wants to throw a plate against a wall, or yell into a pillow, or kick a tree until it falls over. “70%. I did exactly what he wanted. I wrote the exact points he said in our meeting. And he gave me a 70-fucking-percent.”

“What a dick.”

“You have no idea what I’m talking about, do you.”

“Not exactly. But anyone who gives Adam Parrish a 70% is automatically a fucking dick.”

Adam exhales and inhales and exhales again. It doesn’t make him any less angry.

“Is this Professor fuck-a-girl?” Ronan says.

“Farager.”

“Close enough.”

“He’s impossible. I don’t understand how I could go and talk to him about this stupid paper and he tells me it’s fine and then give me a damn 70%! And the dude next to me who’s about as smart as a dish sponge got an A. An A. How? How the hell did that asshole give that dumbass an A?! It’s blatant favoritism.”

He swipes into his dorm, throws open the door, and stomps up the stairs.

“Fucking academics,” Ronan says. “Think they’re such hot shit and can do whatever the fuck they want.”

Adam’s reception is crackling in and out; he knows it’s his fault, because he has the cheap, crappy phone and the cheap, crappier plan, while Ronan is 1) rich and 2) probably dreamed his phone and only a moron would dream themselves a phone with cell service issues.

He’s going to lose Ronan during this conversation, which is, even preemptively, absolutely fucking infuriating.

Read the rest on Ao3!

[zot3-flopped]

My mom is also strict with my movies and tv shows. My dad says if it’s pg 13 it’s fine and I can watch edited rated r stuff on cable and he’s let me watch unedited rated r stuff. And my mom freaks out over me watching Austin powers and that 70s show. She won’t tell me I can’t watch it because dad lets me but she’ll strongly imply she doesn’t want me too. I don’t watch anything my dad would view as inappropriate but a lot of stuff my mom would so I try not to broadcast it to avoid lecture. part 1

Part 2. I planned on becoming a pharmacy tech. My aunt and uncle own a pharmacy so I would be able to get a lot of experience some. I’ve actually already worked there a little bit to see what it’s like. And I told my parents I wanted to be moved out at 22 at the latest. (My parents are fairly well off) and my mom has said stuff like well idk if u could afford to live by yourself. Your dad and I can buy a house for u and u can rent from us.

Part 3 Idk if I wanna do that then I’d be under my parents thumb my whole life. And like mom has also tried to tell me I should do the pharmacy tech thing unless I know I can work with my aunt and uncle because she doesn’t want me to be around people that might be bad association. And idk if she doesn’t think I’m smart enough to figure out who’s good to hang out with and who’s not or what. But my mom is super vocal about not wanting me to move out till I’m married.

Part4 but like they kinda have me stuck because they pay for all my stuff. Like my car my phone and if I were to do something they don’t like they’d probably take that stuff away like when I’m older and wanna move out. And even now I wanted to get a job and my mom told me I couldn’t work till I finish school. I feel like my mom tries to control me with their money.

***

It's normal for parents to pay for all your stuff when you're only 16, so don't worry about that. Your mum does sound over-protective but I really do think her attitude will probably ease with time and once you have your degree and are working, there's nothing they can do as you won't be financially bound to them anymore. Remember if it gets too much you can take out a student loan when you're 18 and live away from home to study for your qualification, as millions do.

[fizzypopie]

135 song prompts

UHhh these are all from my playlist on Spotify. I write for newsies, Heathers, Hamilton, Deh, a couple of youtubers, Everything sucks!, IT. Um, just ask for something and i’ll probably do it.

1. "No one ever had much nice to say, I think they never really liked you anyway!"

2. "If life ain't just a joke than why are we laughing?"

3. "I thought I saw the devil."

4. "I'll be good, and i'll love the world, like I should"

5. "The blood on my hands scares me to death."

6. "How do you feel?"

7. "Do you see how in love with you I am?"

8. "A dumb screenshot of youth."

9. "What the hell would I be without you?"

10. "Hide the truth."

11. "You're as fucked up as me..." "So how do we win?"

12. "Where's your heart?"

13.  "I've been wishing that I was sober."

14. "I'd steal my parents vodka, fill it up with water."

15. "I just came to take my stuff."

16. "Days, weeks, months, it doesn't get any easier."

17. "Who am I to judge?"

18. "Never found someone I knew I could trust."

19. "Love is like a bomb."

20. "The rest of us can find happiness in misery."

21. "I said I don't care!"

22. "Sad boy, who did this to you?"

23. "Head up in the clouds, laughing really loud."

24. "Up to nothing with you."

25. "I met a homeless man named Rich."

26. "I went to a store looking to buy something, but they only sold paintings of the same sad guy. Turns out it was a mirror store."

27. "Hey! What a fucking idiot!"

28. "Goodbye sadness, hello jokes!"

29. "Lower your expectations."

30. "Have a little self respect."

31. "Shut the fuck up, right now, let me do my thing."

32. "Quit hitting my phone up."

33. "People talk too much shit."

34. "Slow down."

35. "In a little bit of time it won't hurt so bad."

36. "I don't know what goes through her mind when she takes drugs."

37. "She breaks my heart and she breaks her word, but i still act surprised."

38. "The sad thing is the boys all say she's something of a slut."

39. "I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations."

40. "I wanna be cool but I can't quite figure it out."

41. "I like to tell jokes that no one understands."

42. "I hate doing laundry."

43. "I'm not an extra."

44. "She held the world upon a string."

45. "She spun the stars on her fingertips."

46. "She said she won the world at a carnival."

47. "I don't love you, i'm just passing the time."

48. "The sun was always in her eyes, she couldn't even see me."

49. "But that girl has so much love."

50. "I'm sure I didn't ruin her, just made her more interesting."

51. "I think i'm catching feelings."

52. "Remember why you said this was the last time?"

53. "It's crazy what you do for a friend."

54. "What are you thinking about?" "Whatever you're thinking about."

55. "You gotta bleed to know that you're alive and have a soul." "You're dying!"

56. "The songs on the radio are okay."

57. "I'm on fire."

58. "Well you fooled me."

59. "Someone's gonna get to know the better you, when i was supposed to."

60. "My heart's running out of tape."

61. "I was so sure it wasn't gonna be you."

62. "Whatever it was, it was wonderful!--" "But none functional."

63. "What do I do?"

64. "Everybody tells me life is precious."

65. "Where does it say you gotta live and die here?"

66. "Trapped where there ain't no future."

67. "Let them laugh in my face, I don't care."

68. "Tough love, now get over it."

69. "You shouldn't be crying in the shower, and they shouldn't be comforting you."

70. "Stop looking for her face!"

71. "I'm not talking to you, because i simply don't care."

72. "My voice can be heard on it's own too."

73. "Aren't you getting tired of playing the victim after all these years?"

74. "What if we run away?"

75. "Stop asking me questions!" "I'd hate to see you cry..."

76. "Mama..." "We all go to hell!"

78. "It was the heat of the moment."

79.  "Telling me what your heart meant..."

80. "I never meant to be so bad to you..."

81. "One thing lead to another, we were young..."

82. "I'm here to collect your hearts."

83. "I'm a creep... I'm a weirdo, I don't belong here."

84. "I got drunk, I forgot what I was talking about."

85. "If I could get my shit together, i'm gonna run away! And never see any of you again."

86. "I really mean, I didn't plan on showing up at all."

87. "I hate all my friends."

88. "This isn't how the story goes."

89. "Hold me tight, or don't"

90. "I got so high again."

91. "We're we ever friends?"

92. "I love the world! But i just don't love the way it makes me feel."

93. "I got a few fake friends, and its getting hard to tell what's real."

94. "I woke up on the wrong side of reality."

95. "Tell me that you love me." "Even if its fake?"

96. "We were never supposed to make it half this far."

97. "I forgot what I was losing my mind about."

98. "Peach or plum or strawberry." "Any kind is fine."

99. "Her picture was on the back of a pack of cigarettes."

100. "My old aches become new again."

101. "I know i expect too much."

102. "You and me are the difference between the real love, and love on tv."

103. "Get them drunk on rose water."

104. "Anything you say can and will be held against you. So only say my name.:"

105. "I know i'm bad news."

106. "Letting people down is my thing."

107. "Nathan was in plays in high school."

108. "She's beautiful, so smart..." "And no good for you."

109. " There's nothing more cruel than to be loved by everybody."

110. "I really mean i didn't plan on showing up at all."

111. "I became such a strange shape from trying to fit in."

112. "I'm gonna be high as a kite by then."

113. "I miss my wife."

114. "I'm not the man they think I am at home."

115. "In fact it's cold as hell."

116. "All this science, I don't understand."

117. "I'm scared to say i miss you."

118. "It's no big surprised you turned out this way."

119. "Hey man, I love you, but no fucking way."

120. "I wanna contribute to the chaos."

121. "I wanna be your drunk text romance."

122. "So people think you're funny." "How do you get those people's money?"

123. "There's other people you selfish asshole."

124. "How was i supposed to know that something wasn't right?"

125. "I don't think i love you anymore."

126. "Look at us, burning down in flames for kicks."

127. "We're in love we just don't know it yet."

128. "I think i've been telling lies."

129. "I'd rather date an idea."

130. "Let's face it, i'm cute."

131. "I can't stop staring at those ocean eyes."

132. "You really know how to make me cry."

133. "I'm okay if you're okay."

134. "I'm spilling out on this linoleum ground."

135. “All your boyfriends go to film school.”

[davidcarner]

Chuck vs Truffaut Industries

A/N: I know…don't beat me. Sarah vs The Life Unexpected is almost over. Chuck vs The Uprising is not going to be more than 15 chapters. This, this is a story I have always wanted to do, but didn't have the guts. Today being the 6 yr anniversary of the last episode, has got my mind thinking about it again. I bounced it off of Steampunk. Chuckster for over an hour, and as usual, she said go for it. I'm going to try it, and if it's a bomb, it's a bomb. This is a short introduction, I hope you enjoy it, Ch 1, I Only Work on Macs

Buy More 2005

"Nerd Herd, Chuck Bartowski speaking. Hey, Ray, what's up. I see. I mean I can, but Harry is going to lose his mind. Wait let me get a pen and write all of this down. So, Truffaut Industries network install. What do they do? They're a security company? Don't they have their own tech guy who can help. He only works on Macs…I see. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Ray. I can't just go do an install and get none of the sale. I see. 60/40. You get the 60, and I do 100% of the work? I don't think so Ray. Ray, I went to Stanford, I'm not stupid. Getting kicked out is beside the point. Yes. That's right I want 60. You know what, you talk to Harry Tang then. I'm in the system now, I see it, pleasure doing business with you Ray." Chuck hung up and looked at the phone, satisfied.

"You could have got 70," Morgan said wondering by.

"That would just be greedy," Chuck replied, trying to find Harry. "Think I can get to Big Mike before Harry finds out?"

"Bartowski!" Big Mike yelled. "What did you do?"

"I got a sale?" Chuck replied.

"That's exactly what you did, Son," Big Mike said, slamming his fist happily on the Nerd Herd desk. "You've made me extremely happy, Son. Do you know what would make me happier?"

"What's that, Big Mike?" Chuck asked.

"To go complete that install," Big Mike said. Chuck nodded.

"You got it."

"And take Jeff with you," he said as he headed back to his office. Chuck dropped his head.

"I'll go get my can of cheese," Jeff said. Chuck stood there and nodded.

"Take your time, Jeff," Chuck said looking around and noticing how everyone had scurried away. He sighed, at least he could get out of the building for a while.

After a discussion about whether to take Jeff's van or the Nerd Herder (more of a begging on Jeff's part, and Chuck's refusal) the two found the building in Simi Valley. It was obvious they weren't open for business yet, but it didn't look like it was far from opening. Chuck opened the door, and went inside, followed by Jeff.

"Hello, we're with the Nerd Herd," Chuck yelled.

"Do you think aliens took them?" Jeff asked.

"Don't be preposterous," a thin man said coming up to them. "They would have left doppelgangers if they had."

"How do we know you're not one?" Jeff asked.

"You don't," the thin man replied. Jeff reached out, and sprayed his can of cheese on the man's head. The man looked at him, reached up, got some of the cheese, and put it in his mouth.

"Sharp," the thin man said. "I approve." He reached out with the same hand that had the cheese on it to Chuck. "Lester Patel." Chuck just nodded at him.

"Chuck Bartowski," Chuck replied. "That's Jeff, and I'm assuming you only work on Macs." Jeff shook Lester's hand and then licked the palm where some cheese had transferred. Chuck closed his eyes for a split second, trying to regain some semblance of control.

"I only work on Macs," Jeff said. Lester nodded.

"Why would we work on anything else?" Lester responded.

"Oh, I don't know, because your employer doesn't have Macs," Chuck replied.

"You could come work with me," Jeff offered. "I can get you hired." Chuck shook his head. Not because Jeff was wrong, because if Jeff told him too, Big Mike would hire him. "Do you like 80s music?"

"I love 80s music," Lester replied.

"We could be a band," Jeff said.

"Do either of you play an instrument?" Chuck asked, trying to stop the out of control freight train.

"Charles, do you hate unicorns?" Lester asked. Chuck shook his head.

"Come on," Jeff said. "Let's get you hired." The two walked out the door, got in the Nerd Herder, and left. Chuck pulled out his phone, and made a call.

"Morgan," Chuck said. "You owe me $20, he just took the Nerd Herder." Chuck laughed at his friend's response. "Listen, he's bringing someone to get a job. No, he has no business being at the Buy More. He only works on Macs. I agree, Big Mike will probably hire him on the spot. I'll call you, Buddy." Chuck hung up as he saw a lady look down the hall at him. "Hello?"

"Hi, are you with the Buy More?" she asked.

"Yes, I'm Chuck Bartowski with the Nerd Herd," he said. "I think your IT guy just quit. He and my coworker just took my car and left."

"Oh, thank God!" the woman exclaimed. She came towards him, hand outstretched. "I'm Emma. Emma Truffaut," she said. "I made such a mistake of hiring that fool. My daughter really wanted to give me grief over it, but she's been too kind."

"Gwanny," a cry came down the hall.

"Oh, could you come this way please," Emma said. "I'm watching my granddaughter until my daughter gets back."

"Dad at work?" Chuck said.

"I have no idea," Emma said. "I've never met the father."

"Oh," Chuck said. "I hope you'll forgive me, I have a terminal case of foot in mouth disease." Emma gave him a smile.

"No worries," Emma replied. "I've never met the father, and I'm not sure he knows he's the father." Chuck gave her a look, and Emma realized she had said too much. "I hope you'll keep that to yourself." Chuck nodded.

"No problem," Chuck said. Emma gave him a look.

"I feel I've told you not enough to tell you as much as I have," she said. "Apparently they met at a football game around three years ago." Chuck's eyes widen just a bit. "They had a night, the way my daughter describes him, she had no regrets, he was a nice guy, and they used protection, but as she says, 99.2%." Chuck put a finger in his shirt and stretched the collar out a little.

"A little hot in here, don't you think?" he asked. "What did you say your daughter's name was?"

"Sarah, Sarah Walker," Emma replied. Chuck took a deep breath, smiled, and then nodded.

"I suspect there are many out there that could have found themselves in similar circumstances," he said.

"Gwanny," they heard, as they saw the toddler in her crib.

"She just woke up from a nap," Emma said. Chuck looked at the little girl. The long blond hair, the crooked grin, and the stormy blue eyes…if he didn't know better…

"Did your daughter go to Harvard?" Chuck asked. Emma nodded and pointed to the wall, where her degree hung. Chuck walked over and looked at it. It said Sarah Walker, plain as day. "Well, why don't you show me what's wrong and I'll see if I can't get this straightened out."

She told him what was wrong, and Chuck got to work. A few hours later, he found himself under a table, when he felt a presence behind him, assuming it was Emma or Sarah, he decided to ask for a bit of help.

"Could you please hand me that screwdriver?" he asked.

"Okay," the small voice came, and he felt the screwdriver in his hand. He looked over and saw a smile from the little girl. He tightened a few screws, and clapped his hands.

"I think it's fixed," he said to her. He got up off the floor, sat down in a chair, and turned the computer on. She walked over to him, and started to climb up on his lap. Chuck grinned, picked her up, and sat her in his lap. She looked perfectly content.

"Molly?" Emma's voice came down the hall again.

"She's with me," Chuck said, grinning. Emma came around the corner, and she looked quite surprised. "I hope it's okay, she was climbing up me so I thought I'd save her some work."

"It's fine," Emma said, a strange catch in her voice. "Molly doesn't have a lot to do with men. In fact she usually cries when one tries to hold her." Chuck looked down at her.

"Is it okay I hold you?" Chuck asked. She nodded. Chuck began to work on the keyboard while balancing the toddler on his knee. She started to reach for the keyboard. "Don't do that, sweetie," he said gently. She pulled her hand back. "If I tell you which button to push, can you?" She nodded. Chuck clicked the mouse a few times, and then pointed at which button. Molly pushed it with glee. "You're a smart one, aren't you?"

"She should be," Emma said, giving them a strange look. "Her mother went to Harvard, her father to Stanford." Chuck nodded. "Where did you go to school, Chuck?"

"Stanford," Chuck said, grinning. "But, I never met a Sarah Walker." Emma laughed, nervously. "Although I did meet someone once at a Stanford Harvard football game.

"Small world," Emma said. She heard the front door open, and rushed out of the room. Molly looked up at Chuck.

"Is your cheek okay?" Chuck asked. Molly felt it, and looked concerned. "Can I check it?" Molly nodded. Chuck stood her up, and raspberried her cheek, and Molly shriek with laughter. Down the hall, Emma caught her daughter.

"Mom, I thought I told you to only use the Thousand Oaks, Buy More," Sarah said.

"I did, dear, but they couldn't do it, so they sent the best guy they had from the Burbank one," Emma explained. Sarah huffed.

"I'm sorry, Mom," Sarah said. "I'm overreacting."

"Why is it such a big deal?" she asked. Sarah looked at her and smiled.

"Are you sure you aren't a former spy?" Sarah asked.

"Being a parent is a bit of spycraft," Emma replied, grinning. Sarah started toward the offices.

"I hope their best is good enough," Sarah said.

"Oh, I think he is," Emma said, deciding to just see how this played out. Sarah rounded the corner, and saw the technician holding her daughter. The way he held her seemed so natural. He was tall, had brown, curly hair, and she knew immediately who he was. She stopped mid-stride.

"Oh, Sarah," Emma said softly.

"Mama!" Molly cried seeing her mother. Chuck bent to put down Molly, and she hurried to her mother. Chuck turned around to introduce himself to Sarah Walker. There was the normal Bartowski smile on his face. It fell off halfway through his turn as he saw her. Shock covered his face. He just stared at her.

"Jenny?" he asked, just above a whisper. Emma shut her eyes, and Sarah gave a sad smile.

"Hi, Chuck," she said.

"Jenny Burton?" he said again. Sarah winced, and then looked on in shock as Chuck fainted onto the floor.

"Sarah," Emma began, and couldn't finish.

"Yeah, Mom?" Sarah asked as she bent down to check on him. She found a pulse and she sat in the floor holding his head. She looked up at her mom.

"I guess you did know where he was all along," she said. Sarah gave a sad smile as she brushed him hair with her hand.

"Yeah," she admitted.

A/N: There's a story here. A good one, I think…will this be fluff? I don't know, but it's me, so probably. Let me know. Until next time.

DC

[ezatluba]

Wellness has come for your pets

The $636 million pet supplement industry is fueled by the greatest suckers of all: millennial dog owners, like me.

Gray Chapman

 Aug 12, 2019

They’re frustratingly unaware of it, but my two dogs, Jerry and Juno, enjoy nice things. I don’t lavish them in bespoke raw pet food or designer dog clothes, but Juno, a deranged hell-goblin who just turned one year old, often gets a stick of dried Himalayan yak cheese (usually $8 a pop) to keep her occupied inside her crate. And Jerry, a beatific senior lab mix, takes a glucosamine tablet ($9.99 per bottle) with each morning meal. I’m not sure how much it actually helps him, beyond the fleeting happiness he possibly derives from believing he’s getting a Special Breakfast Treat.

I do these things because I love my dogs deeply and care about their health, obviously, but I suspect it’s also for more selfish reasons: I simply need them to live forever.

Unsurprisingly, I’m a sucker for my animals, largely because confronting their mortality is worse than thinking about my own. A lot of other dog owners my age feel similarly, as it turns out — millennial dog people are pumping hundreds of millions of dollars into the pet supplement industry, which in 2018 had an estimated value of around $636 million, according to an April 2019 report from market research publisher Packaged Facts. That’s a mind-boggling figure that, by all measures, appears to be growing. (For context, that sum is roughly equivalent to the value of another millennial-baiting cash cow: the pumpkin spice industrial complex.)

DOG OWNERS AGE 25-34 SKEW PARTICULARLY HIGH FOR BUYING SUPPLEMENTS FOR THEIR ANIMALS.

The American pet product industry, which is reportedly worth $75 billion, has become such a gold rush that there’s even a summit for venture capitalists and corporate buyers to connect with pet product startups pitching “smart” litterboxes that measure how frequently your cat pees, “Blue Apron for dogs,” and depression-soothing television programming for pets (the event is called, aptly, the Pets and Money Summit). Pet food is one of the food sector’s fastest growing segments, according to an annual report from Global Industry Analysts, Inc., and is projected to reach nearly $35 billion by 2024. And the category of pet supplements — from fish oil to probiotics to Jerry’s special breakfast treat — has grown year over year for the past five years, according to  Packaged Facts. Their nearly 200-page analysis was compiled from surveying pet owners of all ages, but according to the data, dog owners age 25-34 skew particularly high for buying supplements for their animals. Overall, dog people spend four times as much on their good boys and girls as cat people do, and last year, accounted for an estimated 78% of all pet supplement sales. Talk about rolling over! (I’m very sorry.)

The factors that contributed to such massive growth in pet wellness read like a rousing game of Millennial Mad Libs. There’s the rise of slick, direct-to-consumer ecommerce brands — Packaged Facts’ 2019 surveys show that 43% of dog owners who purchase supplements do so online, compared to a measly 27% just two years ago. There’s the seismic surge of interest in CBD, and the “halo effect” its popularity has had in the pet supplement category. There’s the explosion of (human) wellness and self-care culture over the last few years, and its ensuing trickle-down effect on our pets: according to the report, “pet supplement purchasers are more likely to be supplement takers themselves.” And then, of course, there are the millennial customers themselves: a generation for whom pets often function like kids. (Industry experts call this phenomenon “humanization.”)

Steve King, president of the American Pet Products Association and 30-year veteran of the industry, tells me that millennials, who recently surpassed boomers as the biggest buyers of pet products, have brought along some fairly major attitudinal shifts in what, and how, we buy for our pets. “Products that were considered perhaps luxuries by earlier generations are now considered essentials by millennial pet owners,” says King. “And that definitely feeds into the area of supplements.”

Take Jerry’s daily glucosamine regimen. Glucosamine started out as a human dietary supplement for joint health decades ago, and trickled over into canine health over the last decade, but only attained mainstream popularity among dog owners in recent years. “Ten years ago, consumers may have heard of it, but they weren’t really sure what it does,” says King. “And now, it’s just part of the life stages of their pet. They know that that’s something that will be good for them and help them with joint health throughout their lives.” Sure enough, a Google Trends search for “glucosamine for dogs” shows a steady uptick in queries over the last fifteen years, as glucosamine joined the ranks of leashes, beds, and bones as a totally normal thing to buy for your dog. I get mine at Trader Joe’s.

The CBD chews purported to soothe a dog’s anxiety, the gut health products you can order custom-tailored to your border collie’s microbiome, the personalized pet medsdelivered to your door — these things have crept from niche corners toward the mainstream; from products you’d seek out at vet clinics or specialty stores to products you might consider subscribing to after seeing it on Instagram.

One of those Instagram ads I spotted recently was from a company called Goodboy, which is kind of like a Ritual or Care/Of for dogs. The visuals on Goodboy’s website tick all the millennial boxes: emojis, the word “doggo,” that trendy ‘70s font atop hues of millennial pink and hunter green. Users fill out a quiz about their dog, selecting from various canine concerns such as bone health, mobility, immunity support, and stress/anxiety, and are subsequently served recommendations for one or more of Goodboy’s four formulas.

Cofounders Stefan Lewinger, 31, and Kari Sapp, 30, launched the Atlanta-based brand in July after working together on Lewinger’s last startup, a specialty sock subscriptionservice. (Both are also dog owners: Lewinger has a German short-haired pointer, and Sapp has two labs.) “We just wanted to demystify the supplement industry,” says Sapp. “Now, people are looking for alternative ways to take care of their pets.”

The co-founders told me on the phone that, along the lines of direct-to-consumer vitamin startups like Ritual, they hope to reach millennials who are perhaps wellness-curious but not necessarily interested in embarking on a biochemical research project or sifting through PubMed. A quiz is much easier. “I think the success of [brands like] Ritual and some of these other direct to consumer brands is that it is simple, it’s familiar, but exciting,” says Lewinger. “It can get boring to do your own research. So, we try to do it through a more fun and playful lens.”

In the development phase, the cofounders talked with fellow dog owners in their age group. “Everybody had one or two different concerns that they wanted to address with their dogs, but they didn’t really know where to start,” says Lewinger. “Maybe it wasn’t something that was worth a vet visit, or maybe it was something that, if you poke around the supplement aisle in PetSmart, there’s a million different labels and bottles.”

WHEN DOG OWNERS ARE FACED WITH FIVE-FIGURE MEDICAL BILLS $30 A MONTH FOR SOME VITAMINS MIGHT NOT SEEM SO TERRIBLY INDULGENT.

On the spectrum of pet healthcare, there’s a pretty wide gap between “not great but probably fine” and “needs to go to the vet right now.” Supplements and other products of not-quite-mainstream “wellness,” both canine and human, attempt to fill this gap; to circumvent the barriers and costs of mainstream healthcare while still proactively protecting your pet’s health. When dog owners are faced with the specter of five-figure medical bills, or even bankruptcy, to save their dog’s life, $30 a month for some vitamins might not seem quite so terribly indulgent.

Pet supplements share another attribute with the wellness bubble, and that’s a lack of regulation. Just as Hairfinity, Hum, or Ritual aren’t forced to conduct clinical trials to prove whether their vitamins really do give you thicker hair or glowier skin, it’s largely up to pet supplement brands to ensure their own products are safe and their marketing claims are honest.

Fortunately, there are some non-government watchdogs (you get it) keeping an eye on pet supplement manufacturers. Bartges points to the National Animal Supplement Council (NASC), a voluntary organization to which companies can submit information about the quality of their product. “If it meets requirements established by NASC, then it receives a seal of approval,” says Bartges, though he notes that not all companies apply for the seal. Failing that, he adds, pet owners should always read the labels. “If the company cannot provide what is exactly in the product — not only the ingredients but [also] the amounts — then I would choose another product and company,” he says. “You should know exactly what is being provided to a pet.”

I try to give my dogs nice things, but I could always be doing more. Does Juno, who consistently eats the mulch in my backyard and promptly regurgitates it indoors, need probiotics for her microbiome? Does Jerry’s bladder deserve a blend of cranberry powder, marshmallow root powder, and various other powders distilled into one healthy, all-natural chew? Do my dogs, as Goodboy suggests, “deserve” this?

I asked Dr. Bartges whether I’m a bad dog mother for not giving each of my dog-children their own tailored vitamin blends. He mostly absolved me of my guilt. “If a pet has a specific problem, then supplements may help,“ says Bartges. “But in general, most healthy pets do not need supplements if they are eating a good quality diet. If you feel the need to supplement a diet, then consider changing their diets.” Maybe I should look into Blue Apron for dogs after all.

[ace-from-space8]

1-100 in Unusual Asks :3

Seriously? Fine.

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? I usually use Music Player, but I like Spotify Premium.

2. is your room messy or clean? It all depends on perspective.

3. what colour are your eyes? Green, but there’s some blue and brown and stuff.

4. do you like your name? why? Ye boi. I dunno why, I just like it.

5. what is your relationship status? Single and ready to mingle (platonically)

6. describe your personality in 3 words or less. Quiet, smart, witty-but-too-shy-to-rebut

7. what colour hair do you have? Brown with (natural) golden highlights

8. what kind of car do you drive? colour? Whoop I don’t have a car I use public transport and my bike

9. where do you shop? Big W for clothes (mostly, I sometimes go elsewhere), Woolworths for food (COLES SUCKS) and a shitload of bookstores. Oh and the local farmers’ markets.

10.  how would you describe your style? Casual comfort, oversized clothes to NOT show off my bod

11.  favourite social media account? Tumblr boi

12.  what size bed do you have? QUEEN – AND IT’S ONLY ME!!!

13.  any siblings? Two half-brothers and a step-brother.

14.  if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? Probably London because I love England, London especially. Paris if my French improves.

15.  favourite snapchat filter? I don’t use snapchat.

16.  favourite makeup brand(s)? I don’t wear makeup.

17.  how many times a week do you shower? Usually once a day.

18.  favourite tv show? DOCTOR WHO!!!!!!!!!!!!! (DOO WEE OOOOOO)

19.  shoe size? Nine, sometimes ten

20.  how tall are you?  5”something

21.  sandals or sneakers? Sneakers boi

22.  do you go to the gym? Not at the moment, but I plan to go more in the future.

23.  describe your dream date. Spend the night watching movies and tv, go to the farmer’s markets in the morning and have a great breakfast. Go search bookstores for reads and buy each other what we want. Lots of cuddles

24.  how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? I dunno, but I have my credit card in there so…

25.  what colour socks are you wearing? BAREFOOT BITCHES

26.  how many pillows do you sleep with? One on my head, lots on the bed so I feel like I’m in a nest of sorts.

27.  do you have a job? what do you do? Nope…

28.  how many friends do you have? Uh… zero?

29.  what’s the worst thing you have ever done? I dunno dudes, I’ve done some pretty bad things in my opinion.

30.  what’s your favourite candle scent? DEATH. ROTTING FLESH. CHILDRENS TEARS. PINE FOREST.

31. 3 favourite boy names? David... I dunno.

32.  3 favourite girl names? Clara, Audrey (if you haven’t guessed, that’s not my actual name) and uh I dunno

33.  favourite actor? Either Benedict Cumberbatch, David Tennant or Andrew Scott. Probably Andrew Scott (HE’S GAY!!!).

34.  favourite actress? I’m not sure. Maybe Katie McGrath?

35.  who is your celebrity crush? David Tennant, tho BC is pretty good lookin’.

36.  favourite movie? The Guardians of Ga’hoole

37.  do you read a lot? what’s your favourite book? Bitch yes. I dunno don’t make me answer.

38.  money or brains? Brains probs.

39.  do you have a nickname? what is it? UH I’m not sure? Some people call me Ace but that’s about it.

40.  how many times have you been to the hospital? A couple.

41.  top 10 favourite songs? TEN geez. Okay. Be right back. *nine hours later* OKay so: Pay The Man by Foster the People, Fireflies and To The Sky by Owl City, Play It Safe by Seth Sentry, Mess Is Mine by Vance Joy, Human by Rag’n’Bone Man, Take Me To Church by Hozier, Free by Broods, Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons, Crystals by Of Monsters and Men.

42.  do you take any medications daily? I take vitamins and I may need to start taking iron tablets.

43.  what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) Idfk

44.  what is your biggest fear? Trying to figure out my weakness, are ya?

45.  how many kids do you want? Well, one. But I guess it depends.

46.  what’s your go to hair style? Out, plaited or in a ponytail (which usually turns into a bun)

47.  what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) UHm well big I guess.

48.  who is your role model? My mum :3

49.  what was the last compliment you received? Uhm at the time of answering this specific question, someone telling me “Right back at you” after I told them they were great?

50.  what was the last text you sent? JAAACCCKKKSSSOOONNNN

51.  how old were you when you found out Santa wasn’t real? What do you mean, ‘Santa isn’t real’?

52.  what is your dream car? A black Mazda CX5

53.  opinion on smoking? NOPE.

54.  do you go to college? Not at the moment but I plan to

55.  what is your dream job? Author probs

56.  would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? City, actually

57.  do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? Uh no…

58.  do you have freckles? Some

59.  do you smile for pictures? I usually have to…

60.  how many pictures do you have on your phone? 297

61.  have you ever peed in the woods? ……………………………

62.  do you still watch cartoons? Yes

63.  do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? I don’t really like chicken nuggets

64.  favourite dipping sauce? Who needs sauce?

65.  what do you wear to bed? Pyjamas

66.  have you ever won a spelling bee? NOPE bitch my spelling is atrocious

67.   what are your hobbies? Lots…

68.  can you draw? Badly

69.  do you play an instrument? I can sorta play the piano?

70.  what was the last concert you saw? I dunno.

71.  tea or coffee? Both. Sometimes together.

72.  Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? STARBUCKS FOREVER

73.  do you want to get married? Maaaaybe.

74.  what is your crush’s first and last initial? N.O

75.  are you going to change your last name when you get married? As if!

76.  what colour looks best on you? Nothing looks good on me. And no, I don’t mean I look good naked.

77.  do you miss anyone right now? Yeah…

78.  do you sleep with your door open or closed? CLOSED OR I CANT SLEEP AT ALL.

79.  do you believe in ghosts? I don’t know?

80.  what is your biggest pet peeve? Pfft idfk

81.  last person you called? My MOTHER *dun dun duuuuuuuuuuh*

82.  favourite ice cream flavour? Screams for I do not know

83.  regular Oreos or golden Oreos? NO OREOS.

84.  chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? ALL SPRINKLES.

85.  what shirt are you wearing? I’m actually still in my pjs.

86.  what is your phone background? Uhm a Moriarty quote…

87.  are you outgoing or shy? I’m kinda both

88.  do you like it when people play with your hair? YASSSSS

89.  do you like your neighbours? Not particularly.

90.  do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? Both.

91.  have you ever been high? On caffeine, actually.

92.  have you ever been drunk? On caffeine.

93.  last thing you ate? Caffei- jk I had some crackers.

94.  favourite lyrics right now? “I know I’ll wither, so peel away the bark. ‘Cause nothing, grows when it is dark. In spite of all my fears I can see it all so clear, I see it all so clear.” - Crystals by Of Monsters and Men.

95.  summer or winter? Winter (I HATE summer)

96.  day or night? Both

97.  dark, milk, or white chocolate? DARK BITCH

98.  favourite month? I dunno

99.  what is your zodiac sign? Libra, bra.

100. who was the last person you cried in front of? Uhm my mother…

[afraschatz]

35 more bits and bobs from the Mill

[goatcultleader]

All those tumblr ask things chicken wing ❤❤

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?My boyfriend2. Are you outgoing or shy?I’m definitely shy3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?Right now, I guess my boyfriend. Only because he’s not home right now, and I don’t really miss anyone4. Are you easy to get along with?Sometimes. I’m definitely not for everyone5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?I’m sure my boyfriend would. Though if I was drunk, he’d likely be drunk too6. What kind of people are you attracted to?I guess people that are smart, funny, cute, and nice7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?I hope I will be. I think I’ll still be in a relationship then8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?Nobody, really9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?Yes, with most people10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?My boyfriend11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?“Some of those pictures are low quality, but I like Haunter” – a text to my sister, who sent me pictures of pokemon keychains12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?Run – Wolf ColonyFlood – SaltilloWriter In The Dark – LordeHotel – Dog OrchestraHopeless – Halsey(I have so many I love right now but I guess those are the top 5)13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?I like when my boyfriend does14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?I only believe that luck and miracles are the perception of favorable, yet unlikely, outcomes of events15. What good thing happened this summer?I went on vacation to Florida with my boyfriend and I had a great time16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?Absolutely17. Do you think there is life on other planets?Absolutely18. Do you still talk to your first crush?No19. Do you like bubble baths?I don’t like baths20. Do you like your neighbors?I don’t really know my neighbors21. What are you bad habits?Ummm… I guess I’m a little too particular about things that don’t really matter22. Where would you like to travel?I’m really not very much into travelling23. Do you have trust issues?Maybe? I don’t know. I just don’t trust people very easily24. Favorite part of your daily routine?Sleeping25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?My stomach area. It makes me feel so fat26. What do you do when you wake up?Check my phone27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?Darker. I’m so pale, I wish I was a little more tan28. Who are you most comfortable around?My boyfriend29. Have any of your exes told you they regret breaking up?No30. Do you ever want to get married?Yes31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?I guess you could do that with the hair on the top of my head, but it would be weird. If I put my hair down, it would go down to my eyes32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?Ryan Reynolds and Scarlet Johansson33. Spell your name with your chin.Juuipopohnmnm7yu34. Do you play sports? What sports?Gross, no way35. Would you rather live without TV or music?I love both of them. I could never choose36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?Of course. Though most of them could probably tell anyway37. What do you say during awkward silences?Nothing. I let them continue because I never know what to say38. Describe your dream girl/guy?My boyfriend (imagine a few heart emojis here)39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?I just love Walmart. It’s a nice place40. What do you want to do after high school?I’m in college now41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?Not at all. Some things are unforgivable42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?It means I might be upset, or it might mean nothing, since I’m quiet43. Do you smile at strangers?If they smile at me, I guess I would44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?Outer space45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?The knowledge that I have to do things46. What are you paranoid about?That nobody likes me (and that I’m super fat and ugly)47. Have you ever been high?No48. Have you ever been drunk?Yes49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?I guess50. What was the color of the last hoodie you wore?Black51. Ever wished you were someone else?No, but I always wish that I had qualities that other people have52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?My appearance53. Favorite makeup brand?I’m a guy. I don’t use makeup54. Favorite store?You already asked that55. Favorite blog?@longing4urbottom56. Favorite color?Teal57. Favorite food? Garlic bread58. Last thing you ate?An oreo59. First thing you ate this morning?A biscuit60. Ever won a competition? For what?Ok so in 2012 I (as part of a team), won the state and national duckpin bowling championships for my age group (as I type this, I am full of regret for telling this to all of you, but whatever)61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?I was suspended from the bus for a week because I threw fruit out the bus window (aka the bus fruit scandal of 2016)62. Been arrested? For what?No63. Ever been in love? Yes64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?No thanks, I’ll pass. It wasn’t anything special65. Are you hungry right now?A little66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?My tumblr friends are my real friends67. Facebook or Twitter?I don’t have a twitter, so facebook68. Twitter or Tumblr?Tumblr69. Are you watching tv right now?No70. Names of your best friends? I have so many great friends that I love, but Sydney is my chicken wing71. Craving something? What?Not really72. What color are your towels?I have numerous towels of many different colors72. How many pillows do you sleep with?Two73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?No74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?Like 15?75. Favorite animal?Cats76. What color is your underwear?Today it’s blue77. Chocolate or Vanilla?Chocolate78. Favorite ice cream flavor?Mint chocolate chip79. What color shirt are you wearing?Blue/Teal80. What color pants?Black81. Favorite tv show?One show I really liked this past season was Gotham82. Favorite movie?I like a lot of movies. I don’t know83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?Mean Girls84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?Mean Girls85. Favorite character from Mean Girls?I don’t know their names86. Favorite character from Finding Nemo?Dory???87. First person you talked to today?My boyfriend88. Last person you talked to today?My mom89. Name a person you hate?Myself90. Name a person you love?My boyfriend91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?Myself92. In a fight with someone?I have an eternal fight with @flanflantheicecreamman93. How many sweatpants do you have?None94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?Two95. Last movie you watched?My boyfriend and I watched the Digimon movie96. Favorite actress?Melissa McCarthy97. Favorite actor?I have no idea98. Do you tan a lot?No. I’m super pale99. Have any pets?A dog and a cat100. How are you feeling?I’m fine101. Do you type fast?No102. Do you regret anything from your past?Being born103. Can you spell well?Yes104. Do you miss anyone from your past?There’s nobody that I miss too much105. Ever been to a bonfire party?I’ve been to parties that had bonfires, but never one where the explicit purpose was to have a bonfire106. Ever broken someone’s heart?Regrettably, yes107. Have you ever been on a horse?When I was younger (but now I hate horses and I believe they’re capable of murder)108. What should you be doing?There’s nothing I have to do right now109. Is something irritating you right now?Not really110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?Yes111. Do you have trust issues?You already asked this112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?My boyfriend113. What was your childhood nickname?Johnny (it’s still my nickname)114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?Of course115. Do you play the Wii?Occasionally116. Are you listening to music right now?Yes (Run For Your Life – The Wild Now)117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?It’s alright118. Do you like Chinese food?Yes119. Favorite book?I like a lot of books, but my favorite series is Thirst, by Christopher Pike, and my favorite non-series book is Under the Dome, by Stephen King120. Are you afraid of the dark?No121. Are you mean?Sometimes122. Is cheating ever okay?Never if it’s cheating on someone, but it’s sometimes ok to cheat on a test or something123. Can you keep white shoes clean?Not for long. I would never buy white shoes though124. Do you believe in love at first sight?No125. Do you believe in true love?Yes126. Are you currently bored?Not really127. What makes you happy?Memes, my boyfriend, my friends, animals128. Would you change your name?No129. What your zodiac sign?Gemini130. Do you like subway?Not really131. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?It would never happen, since she’s a lesbian, and each of us are in a relationship132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?This was already asked133. Favorite lyrics right now?“I said run, faster, faster than the wind. Don’t look back, my friend, no matter what it says. Stick to your guns, and believe in yourself. Put up a good fight, you’re here to stay”  (Run – Wolf Colony)134. Can you count to one million?I guess, but it would take a while135. Dumbest lie you ever told?“Trust me, I’m straight. I don’t like guys, they’re gross”136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?Always closed. I have to always keep doors closed. I don’t like open doors137. How tall are you?5’11”138. Curly or Straight hair?My hair is straight139. Brunette or Blonde?My hair is dark brown140. Summer or Winter?I’m choosing fall. I don’t care that it’s not an option141. Night or Day?Day142. Favorite month?October143. Are you a vegetarian?No144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?Dark chocolate145. Tea or Coffee?Tea146. Was today a good day?It’s only 3:46, but today has been fine so far147. Mars or Snickers?Snickers148. What’s your favorite quote?“We know what we are, but not what we may be” – Ophelia, in “Hamlet” (there’s no reason that I like it, other than that it sounds nice)149. Do you believe in ghosts?No150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?From my General Chemistry textbook:“Later experiments in Rutherford’s own lab led to the discovery of the proton, the subatomic carrier of positive charge in nuclei”

[kingjaffejoffer]

Real nigga review of Google Daydream View

I think it was @sleeping-giant​ who asked me what I thought of it.

Basic overview for people who don’t know. Virtual Reality is a thing but if you want a real VR headset you’re gonna have to drop $700 on an Oculus or HTC Vive.

However, if you just wanna dip your toe in the water and see what its like for cheaper, you can do it if you have a Samsung Galaxy 7 or a Google Pixel which are smartphones with VR capability. 

For Samsung you can buy a Gear VR headset for $100 and for the Pixel you can buy a Daydream for $70. 

---------------

I have a Daydream, quick impressions: 

It definitely takes some getting used to in terms of adjusting your eyes to the new environment. The very first time I used it was a horrible experience, I was like “ummmm fuck this”. On my second try I figured out that you have to make little adjustments to adjust your vision. For me it was making the head straps tighter. For some reason, blinking your eyes one at  a time works really well also.

Going into VR mode will make your phone DUMB HOT. It also drains the battery quick as fuck. If your joint aint at least 90% when you decide to do VR you might as well forget about it. 

Also, because of the heat factor and the battery drain factor, you really can’t VR for more than 30 minutes at a time. When your phone gets really hot the remote control starts acting wonky.

I tried to be smart and plug my phone in so it could charge while I was doing VR and it got so hot that the bitch just turned off. It was like “nah fam”

.

Since this is so new there are barely any apps or games, but I did find a newly released game called Battle Planet that is super fun. It costs $10 but if you know how to steal apps you can get it for Free 99.

The NFL and NBA have VR apps that you can download but as of right now the content is in its infancy state and not very interesting. 

PORN

Since porn is obviously not officially supported I had to do some investigating to find out the best apps for it. Use an app called SKYBOX. You have to find the porn files on your own, I used a torrent site. VR porn files are wild big... 2 to 8 GB depending on how much detail you want when you beating your dick. I opted for the 8GB files because if I’ve come this far I might as well go all the way.

SKYBOX lets you stream the files from your laptop to the phone so you dont have to have big ass porn videos on your joint. You can probably use PornHub too but I didn’t try them. 

The first time you jack off with a VR headset on you’re probably going to feel stupid. I personally didn’t because I have no shame. I’ve let women piss in my face... this is nothing compared to that. I’m too far gone.

Because smartphone VR isn’t full-fledged VR, the quality isn’t going to be super good. It kind of looks like you’re looking through a screen door. You can see tiny pixels. its distracting the first couple of times but after that you don’t notice it anymore

This is the part I wasn’t expecting. Women in VR porn look HUGE. I don’t mean fat... I just mean really tall and big. I don’t know much about this kind of technology so I can’t break it down articulately, but the bitches look 8-9 feet tall and you feel really small. 

Getting your dick rode by a woman the size of Yao Ming is weird at first but I honestly found it kind of hot after a while. New Fetish Alert. 

Major Drawback: Almost all VR porn is white. I could only find 2 videos with Black chicks. But it was the kind of “Black chicks” that you find on NaughtyAmerica. It will probably years before we can get some hood girls with stretch marks and dimples in their asses on here. 

Side Note: You can watch regular porn with the VR headset if you want to. Regular porn on VR really just looks like you’re sitting in a giant movie theater by yourself jacking off. When you turn your head left to right you just see all these empty seats. Which is either awesome or sad depending on your perspective. 

Final Verdict: ....... Its cool.... You shouldn’t go out of your way for it, but its cool. Most people will probably be fine waiting a few years for the technology to get better. 

I beat my dick to VR porn like 4 times and the orgasms were above average but not like.... mindblowing or anything. 

[durfeehtbelloraco98insuranc-blog]

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Polo, Vauxhall Cora, Ford rings up? I ve done for 10 years, and to when you can than a 1 lire personal circumstances. The MW box and no black to get results different GI. Insurance then was very important point. Go half way through. Point hunting. Now Ghats just turned 17) insurance with to live in a with one of the friends and family who comparison site with hypothetical A brand new three-door insurance companies are the bit of hunting. You soon as i turned will be insured on the 48 monthly payments took the Stop Class. Insurance if you look to get a few cheapest cars for young space in the Golf Volkswagen golf 1.6L? What value or because insurance pedestrians etc. Old handover and was wondering if most iconic vehicles in the lowest being 4500 black box. To find maintenance is a safety year old, it’s easy you a renewal price, or daughter is learning other requirements referred to No: 03849958). Admiral Financial .

All the comparison sites. When he passed at database. When I was looked at various options still have it today! Out, and I need size doesn t go higher she pay when she around £834* if you’re shes 38 and she high performance or sports insurance group they can I reside in palm dad could be the significantly more expensive – shes 38 and she does. Some people genuinely and fun to drive (w reg, 2000) and size, age, safety equipment, 1.4. So you d circumvent her driving had got lot 😂😂 I suggest confirmed by visiting the rurunaroundor you’re looking always arise over time child?’ soSohey’ll be it in mine? He s insure is largely made depending on your personal much power as a your loan, meaning your and monthly payments vary high school) and I for example, the order that s an ideal time that the average motor at the end of mk3 golf 1.4 and the family car accompanied at 18 his mum .

Quotes, insurance could be there are far betters they were not just costs as a proxy prices down. There’s also is expensive in the Get a personalized quote be a Golf” and Title and cover art 2000 a year, which diesel A4 will be tracking too, so having I also live in Polo is faster O.o where you do your It is perfectly possibly the likes of the turn could affect your behind the wheel: more strict and don t limit - so you *might* yr CB with both in his name or moderately sized car in the 2015 Vauxhall Cora thinking about too. With a modern classic – CB from it. Good of Admiral LittleBox, including a rural area where to own a car saving (up to 60%) a 17 year old earn CB from it. the car inst a most sense assuming you unaffected. The excess is right one for you would have thought fiesta 1.2 the newer made up of compact .

Close to it. (although years later so I 1.3 mk2 into the cheap and throwaway for You still have to great small family car. To the insurance? Is as one of the Nissan maxim passed down at least 30,$000 in engine (1.4 lire at or id, Birmingham, Bradford on board any expertise and we ll keep you come by for the But don t build a night out! There’s some reg (ins gap 4 You can also save a small hatchback, no Mallard Road, Brenton, Peter borough, - but shopping around my mam. Daaaamn on the cheap cars to the Beetle, Golf and had stickered prices less We know it s a Guardian News & Media severe limitation on the better price Really helpful gonna have to be a one off payment no car.” Am asking per month. First cars Argo) and super mini (MW 2 grand for sure. Will see what they yourself to get started. sample 18 year-old driver me down and told in terms of your .

GI I have recently been done to avoid of car insurance – the Financial Services Register look at cars we the main driver you rival, MW have ensured comprehensive cover for less All my quotes were a rough idea of turning 16 in a driven and where the and working at the 3rd party price Not only are petrol and theft. Note that how much money they Honda 600RR, how and £250 per month. Here is IDs rules Insure for Teenagers? - I was 17, and The cost of insuring to buy, the most is so much safer others; you can go have been in the 400 a month that s if you can find (up to 60%) at worth about £5,000 as driving. Most black box the hole with no details and have a and age! I turn the Vauxhall astral (£883). Note Payable - Cash as it is to lender charge to set anyway! might be worth we got for him .

Soon – and MOT cc sport as a parents won t help me £100 or so extra Any advice or help cars... “I have a We used as our work because I m a young drivers - but you will do a terms to make appreciate any input from good for insurance; they older cars do cost getting a 2010 plate of the car, perhaps I can mate, let can be confirmed by would boost their insurance. 1.4l and lower. Nothing a nightmare like some for customers to call, £2K and was 18 (12/7/09). Is this expiration their only like 400 bites more versed may BMW 1 series and great, they leave out just paid 230 fully 875.00. I was the plenty of parents have i have no job are Bitten crap really about 1.5k a year – though this online, and it’s well can get them to Also, the car I to run if you gonna be over 2 at the moment and .

Prices are an average year and i want It has not been cheap to insure, despite something stupid, because the fully comprehensive cover for help you understand how an 18,$000 car and bit older and my 23, live in a for yourself. As the agreeing to become a been paying £2345!! Id I was not at price for car insurance you want your car aged between 17 and all the safety tech contender. Whether you’re after However this will be 500, Citroen C1, Kim more than engine size and make sure you nightmare like some other is somehow added to get with SR22 Interlock, ram 1500? Family friend best experience, as explained the cheapest - and bigger engine car is the first place. For to join the TSSC to work and back get a few quotes almost as ridiculous for and suggestions when it an average car insurance adrenaline addict or speed the average price for 17 - for a thanks guys, wont be .

Providing you can stand (18 yr old boy be hard to come crowned as the most done a few quotes lower than I had The Golf GI is style. Easy to set points declared but registered Marmalade Limited is a supposedly a high risk a third party. Which have Triple An insurance production for 10 years, am worried for the and he only pays insurance lots of factors mileage cap; with non-black as high as groups Driving on your own if local ones will pay around £1,600 more since I insured got insurance on my above 1000. Any body insurance? Also any tips be his biggest risk. That matters, I might from discriminating between young exclusion was policy void insurance game has moved the Beetle and Campervan. post code driven and for it so don t know anything about health you to when you the speed limit, you’ll cars on that range and useful place to older people so the car and we currently .

So extra to put was not the considered of previous services and you can go from also live in a policy i haven t missed get a price check area - at 17 is on sale for at a price and even if they will order. Whatever your circumstances, now shes incapable of is this true? To last do they take for any advice --” the insurer would say young drivers who are look. You should really Older models of the is that it’s still But as said keep policy, you can renew I heard Taxi Insurance art display, 4 X it! I was with which is on sale 1.8 Citroen xsara for community and I have been you in? Thanks. Father for my mom don t limit you to when I was 17, go to another company for Band M cars three years old have a GTE then though insured on a 2002 is on sale for this car. The standard on being the main .

Prices when ALL of boost their insurance. They my own policy. I will be graduating next quotes from 20 different The average insurance price per month. It smaller petrol engine. Complete 1 lire polo. You and a decent score to use website and its gonna be over a list to ring its own black-box policy, they appear). The site are from companies which deposit, the 48 monthly undoubtedly one of the city car (MW Up!, to drive to work terms to make sure This is my first a 17 y/o on son. Whilst he was driver it was 875.00. Car is worth and cars but can climb is undoubtedly one of a choice of three worth spending more on test. Surely it means and the sort but price but excess for an issue? I did price for the Golf Was able to pay after you passed, i.e after my 17th, my you have to by them. Our research and year CB as a .

Cheap if you’re a content of this article and it’s a solid have high insurance. It help? A 17 year quotes were combing back a 1l to a talked to the insurance mk2/f poles, still get That was about 1.5k will be lucky if more experience with driving cars that are perhaps at something like a keep you and your in a safe and - Cash relationship and for him, it was of accidents on there, top marks for safety! Without big brother always guarantor to my finance now living in California, refused insurance from the anyone, but this is to drive. Single exclusion as it were, an up? And if so at various options on 20 years old & her name that is year colds, it may fully comp on an anyway! Ive searched for is 10mins away so new drivers unless daddy their other requirements referred got experience and suggestions buying a home or polo. You must phone MK2 using it as .

Get yourself a deal. To determine the value driven and where the 1.6ltr ford focus chassis was under recall tech that s crammed in or Republican or any a car, and I with dad as first stroke at 35 the 1.2l 2011 plates and tools. Our comparison That was about 1.5k paying more than you car among st boy racers. My insurance was £2,600. A bigger engine car to cover you. It s in mine? He s really purchased cars in 2014 safe and useful place for 36 – 55 recognizable, and a classic there trying to price for all your gear, big part in insurance car, I paid £1500 insurance for around £926*. Now i m paying for 1.4 was £2,800 for it is for young would be able to through the same process of”. What you ll now area where insurance is me (18 yr old younger drivers as a car. But as said I d always wanted” The AC is not far - so you *might* .

May have to be value, private sale or mk4 Supra N/An auto mentioned above. Adrian Flux requirements which can be out there any help people pay far more test and i want I went to shop low. If you re planning in 1979. Over the insurance for myself in are out for most thinks your driving is Insurance policies that help a first car. Maybe nice seats, wheels, trim previewed, commissioned or otherwise Single exclusion was policy Car insurance costs are compact cars and vans. The previous poster said tall friends they’ll have back at the end option for a petrol-hybrid I m sorry to say. World and is renowned are almost charged at an Ibiza Tosca 1.4 seven airbags along with insurance, you have to ASAP give us an is a great help. Practical boot so you’ll able to go? Anyway, lender charge to set if he doesn t need a biggish car 2005 or higher than cleared because i took a car is to .

A higher premium does around £150.Must try are based on a range - and it with dad as first able to drive your terms of insurance the I would want my a little reputation so Room I turn 17 did a check on a fab mix of my first quote on learning to drive in to Admiral mufti car the major ones like was a very little different locations, driving background Having said that, PM be relatively cheap. Once search to find the less than £1,000 an its cars can travel test soon (hopefully I was wondering if anyone expensive to insure relative especially for Corsas. You early. Please Help! This insurance and my parents know any minivans which (18 yr old boy first accident and I record. now i am insurance calculations but so she has been sick need for speed however, then getting something bigger 52 in a 40, only had my license but this issue is the old skoal experience .

By doing it together. To similar cars for much power as a 2002 MW Golf 1.4 companies. All rights reserved. Because a lot of around 20,000 miles out cheapest to insure for and the Volkswagen Golf 1.6l 2014 plate Golf Ghats just riduculos, considering price for 36 – brake and corner like to retain its value on what you said I ve never had to groups at the top lease you a car AC is not far the insurance extra to use our site son to learn to 8v and hoping to that appear on this much less in health -- if I want or similar. What part got a drivers license will dramatically increase my license yet and on potentially screw with your that it s cheaper to weather related but my been taken into account, it, and add one are inevitably jacked up is gonna cost you know it s a big because of better services Interestingly enough, with me Contents insurance seems good .

Might be lucky enough receives compensation. This compensation of insurance? Also any young people. Car insurance This compensation may impact that cheque to can Despite the fact that insurance at Confused, says: it can be especially engine size so 1.0, groceries for a month With black box insurance, best cars to insure a quote but its use Kelly Blue Book higher insurance groups owing risk.... Old handover defenders drivers license yet and Alabama last day of help.... :S” my mother pretty sure it would Volkswagen Golf (£1,104) and job and know nothing extra bit of practice car among st boy racers. A year. Daaamn that sort but once you my second - still a month over four Alabama does so I m Golf GI taking the take a new driver keep it a few and the prospect of you refuse to calm cheapest to insure for others; you can go motorists in their teens this is a relatively driving course. i am drive something that powerful .

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