#behold my salads

[spontaneousmusicalnumber]

Is anyone else's tumblr logging out a LOT more? For the past few days whenever I use tumblr on mobile it logs me out of desktop

@changes

[egcdeath]

omg i loved loved loveddd that marriage fic of patrick zweig!! there is a serious shortage of patrick zweig x reader fics, I had a request actually if you could maybe write more of pregnant reader x patrick or maybe even newborn dad patrick (i have a soft spot for that& i loved the ending because of that) tysm!! :)

thank you and that prompt is so cute!! i’m currently super busy, so i really do not have the time/mental capacity for a whole fic so here’s a (long) list of headcanons!

also, i’m imagining the pairing from something old, something new, but you don’t have to read that to get this!

when you first tell patrick that you’re ready for kids, that man is ECSTATIC. in SOSN, they’re just “friends” but he definitely has feelings for her before they address it, so taking the step to start a family together is a huge one.

patrick suddenly starts believing alllll of the old wives tales and superstitions about pregnancy. you have to call him out for it every now and then like, “patrick, wtf??” and he’s always just like “i swear it’s true, i heard it from a friend of my friend’s aunt.” and you just give him a crazy look.

once you finally take a test and find out it’s official, the two of you are SO excited. patrick tries to lift you up and spin you off the ground but that almost instantly triggers your morning sickness.

that man is so excited to be a father. he’s constantly putting his hand on your tiny bump and reading books on parenting (you don’t know that you’d ever seen him read a book before then) and asking you about when you’re free to take baby related classes. you have to remind him that you’re really not that far along and he needs to chill.

he would be so accommodating to you. hold your hair back while you’re having morning sickness. wake up in the middle of the night to get the ingredients and make you a pickle watermelon salad. massage your swollen feet. he already loves and cares about you so much and he wants to be sure to give you and the baby the top tier of treatment ever.

patrick is very much a hot head who loves to argue. and i think in the early stages he might egg on your mood swings A LITTLE BIT. but i think pretty quickly he’d realize he needs to dial it back because arguing with a pregnant person is crazy. but every now and then you just want to argue with him to argue with him or old times sake, and when he ends up being the bigger person, you say something about it and he’ll humor you. i actually think it would be so funny if you and him had like . a safe word to indicate that you were just playing, that way he doesn’t say the wrong thing and make you cry or something.

specifically for the pair from sosn, i think that they would maybe vaguely mention that they were trying to get pregnant to their family, but they wouldn’t tell family until it can’t be hidden anymore. like sometimes you just want something to yourselves, and you know that if your families get involved, things will be WAYYYY blown out of proportion. you tell your friends, who are super happy for you, and you tell your family who are also very happy for you. your families immediately start debating about baby name and whose great grandma is going to be the baby’s namesake. patrick insists that there will be more than one baby to name, then winks at you.

as the baby approaches, he’s coming with you for appointments. it is his final season before he retires, so he is pretty busy, but he’s either flying to meet you or for you to meet him vice versa. he ends up having a tennis event end on the same day as one of your ultrasound appts and you’re SO sure that he isn’t going to be able to make it, but lo and behold. who comes running through the door just as the doctor starts applying that cold gel to your stomach??? you actually cry a few tears of joy. patrick kisses them off your face.

you’re struggling these last few months or pregnancy, but patrick has your back. i can see him being super accommodating during this time period, especially once his tennis commitments end.

he starts tearing through his books and making you come to all of these classes with him. you’re kinda having the time of your life bonding with your man and getting a little less anxious for your baby.

you go into labor in the middle of the night. patrick grabs your birth bag (the two of you have been preparing for this) and holds your hand the whole time that he’s speeding down the highway.

this man is full of theatrics when you get to the hospital. he’s yelling and shit. he’s asking all of the doctors where they went to school and if they’re qualified to take care of you. they’re sick and tired of him immediately. you wish you could be sick and tired of him but you’re actually to scared to care.

you’re in pain. he keeps telling you that he wishes he could take all your pain and give it to him. he’s so dramatic. you love him with all of your being.

your labor is not a short one, but he’s by your side for every single second that he can. he’s telling you stupid stories. he’s talking about things you’re gonna do with the baby when they arrive. he’s trying everything he can to distract you.

when it’s time to start pushing, he holds your hand again. you’re squeezing his hand so hard that it goes a little numb, but he doesn’t mention it. he’s cheering you on like you’re at a sporting event.

suddenly your baby is here. the two of you cry happy tears when you hold her. it’s the best moment of your lives.

adjusting to having a baby at home is definitely… something! the two of you consider hiring a nanny (as all rich people do) but ultimately decide against it. patrick is literally retired so like, stay at home dad era incoming!!

babies really are not glamorous so i’ll skip all the gross stuff and focus on the good.

you guys think the baby is the cutest thing on earth. even though you’re sleep deprived and stressed and still in a good amount of pain, you think that the baby is the best thing either of you have accomplished.

sometimes you watch in the doorway when patrick sings and rocks the baby to sleep. it is the cutest thing you’ve ever witnessed.

patrick lovessss a baby bjorn. he’s walking around the house chatting it up with your baby, just telling her about how much of a tennis legend he was back in the day, flipping pancakes in the kitchen with baby attached to him, etc etc. anything he can do, he swears baby can also do.

patrick is just so cute and sweet and gentle with the baby.

patrick girldad?? idk. just think about it.

patrick loves dressing up your daughter in silly little baby outfits. she loves it. you just shake your head in mock disapprovement while patrick brings the baby over to your face for a little cheek kiss, followed by his own cheek kiss. it’s very hard to be pretend disappointed after that.

once baby is a little older, i think the two of them would try to get her into tennis. maybe see if it’s her calling. it’s not. but she loves dancing, so that’s what she does!

the two of you are at every recital, watching her clumsily tot around. it’s so cute. patrick swears she has star power and is gonna be big some day. you lovingly roll your eyes at him. he insists it’s true.

your families also LOVEEEE the baby. i could see patrick being pretty overprotective from them at times too though, especially when they try to insist that she should be a certain way or do a certain thing.

the three of you are a very happy family. you were a little worried before you asked about how he might be as a father, or scared that he was going to run off at the proposition but he’s definitely taken to it.

i hope you enjoyed reading that as much as i enjoyed writing it! this was super fun to do and i would love to write more hcs for anyone who has any more ideas!!

[rleep80-blog]

I work at a Grocery Store. I have for about 15 years. Recently (within the last year) I was promoted. I went from a sheltered bubble of Store security, to a harsh reality. The reality is that I would rather deal with criminals who I already know have mental health issues, then the general public who hide there flaws for the sake of “presentation”.

Here is why….

I would expect no common decency from someone who has reached a point in their life that they steal or shit on the floor or stab someone in the head, to lack morals and values and common decency. So it was quite the culture shock, to realize that all of the “normal” people, are even bigger assholes. Case and point…

I am helping my produce department fill salads. I have a u-boat out. FULL of boxes. It is directly across from the two refrigerated doors I am filing. I have about three to four feet in-front of me. U-boat to salad wall. That’s what I am doing. Filling product. It doesn’t sound like it’s hard work. But the up and down and back and forth and bending and reaching and cutting my arms on the pushers , after time, it gets physical. Like…. I am sweating.

And it’s a Sunday. What’s wrong with Sunday? Well, EVERYONE for some reasons wants to grocery shop on god damn Sunday.

Anyway, I am there, in this little cubby corner of this huge ass store, and low and behold… here comes the first person. With a big ass cart. Rolls it right infront of my little space and wants me to stop what I am doing, get up, and move. So they can walk through my little space and interrupt me working. AS IF THERE WAS NO WHERE ELSE TO WALK. AS IF THERE WERE NOT 5 OPTIONS OF PATHS TO TAKE.

I smile and they say “excuse me” and shrug their shoulders and apologize. I let the first few instances of that blatant inconsideration roll off my shoulders.

And after any the 30th time, different people, I am to the brink of snapping on someone. Because not only do people do this all day to people working in a grocery store, but I am literally stocking 8 glass doors FULL OF GODAMN SALAD. You need the one salad I am filling. Or YOU need to get on the other side of me so bad and cannot walk around? It’s bad enough I have to sit here and wonder why we need 5,000 different types of fucking salad for your picky spoiled asses.

They will not stop. They will never stop. YOU will never stop. It’s entitlement and laziness and a sheer lack of respect or courtesy.

The general public does this all fucking day. Turning a two hour job into a three hour job. Making my body even more sore so you don’t have to walk a few more feet. The sheer ignorance blows my mind.

So yes, I would rather deal with a crackhead. At least I have no hope with a crackhead. I suppose I could be naive to think people are aware enough of their own surroundings that they take others into consideration? Wow… what a dream world that would be. 🖕🏽

# from my head

[speedycoffeedelight]

An Animalistic Disaster

Summery: Where Charlie ignores Vaggie's warning once again and falls into a disaster

Master list

CH- 2 : The golden book

*Back to the present*

You released the sheep on the kitchen floor as you went to your fridge. 'Wait, sheeps do eat lettuces right? I think they do..' you thought as you picked up some lettuces that you were saving for salad. You made sure to properly wash them before putting it on a bowl and giving it to the sheep. As for the moth, you cut a bit of orange that you had and put it on a small plate near the moth.

Charlie was looking around and trying to take all of your room in. She was suddenly painfully aware of how small she was and how big everything looked. For Vaggie it was worse. She was trying to take everything in too but the light bulb in the room was far too distracting. They told each other what they were while coming inside. Charlie was squealing in joy to learn she was a fluffy adorable little sheep, though a bit worried on how to turn back.

Vaggie on the other hand, was not happy to learn at all that she was a moth now. She was small and weak now and can't do anything to help herself or Charlie. Plus being a moth came with its disadvantages. Like right now.

'damn light bulb....'

With a click you put down the plate in front of the little sheep wondering around. The sheep started to eat it rather quickly and you chuckled looking at it.

You looked around to find the moth on the orange bits you put out. You decided it's time for you to eat and pass for the day. You were tired as hell from unpacking today. You can start working tomorrow.

You just warmed up some foods that were prepared beforehand. While washing your dishes you felt a poke at your leg. You looked down to see the little sheep staring up at you.

"Aww, has my little ewe finished eating? Don't worry dear, I'm giving you a spot to sleep soon." You said while walking over to pick up the bowl and plate." Just let me finish washing these real soon"

After cleaning them you quickly took out a big ass basket that you had in your room. You took out your stuff from there and placed a soft pillow there. You then picked up the sheep and put it there. And behold, it fit perfectly!

"Sleep here darling, it's comfy no?" You said while petting the ewe again and feeling it fluffy wool. 'thank you for doing these for us!' Charlie wanted to tell you but all she managed was a little Baa.

"I take that you like it then?" You said smiling. The moth from before suddenly flew over and sat on top of the sheep's wool.

"Hey look your little friend is here too. Sleep tight both of you" you said as you got up and went around the house making sure everything was locked properly since you've living alone now.

You moved to your own bed after finishing some small things you needed to do and prepared to sleep. As soon as you layed down, exhaustion quickly caught up to you leaving you knocked out soon. Charlie and Vaggie soon followed being exhausted by today's turn of events as well. You slept in peace knowing you made two small friends today.

However, that peace was broken when you woke up to loud barking the next morning.

(image not mine!!)

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

pt II our flag means death but I've never watched it

HELLO OFMD FANDOM! It's the Good Omens Mascot and Resident Dumbass, back again for part II. First, let's clear the air of all controversy!

Some of you lovely maggots were kind enough to warn me about certain discourse about a salad spoon and also about a certain gentleman named Izzy. I was warned not to make assumptions and not to take sides, and I hear some members had to leave the fandom for a while because it got toxic. Maggots. All the rest of you. Worry not about me. I'm here to unite the OFMD fandom! How, you ask? By being so undeniably stupid in my own opinions that you all will have to unite to disagree with me. You underestimate the power of my dumbassery. Well, let's not dilly dally and dawdle, here's the updated summary:

I have been informed there is cannibalism on this ship but it is not real. Someone pretends to eat someone and then their wife helps them fake their death while they run away from the ship though their lover wanted them to run to China.

There are BDSM lesbians, which is honestly such a slay, Pinterest has let me down by not informing me of that when I made Part I. I will no longer be using Pinterest a reliable source in future academic essays.

Mermaid Stede performs necromancy while a song called Kate Bush plays (I don't know who this is, a politician? Idk whether of US or UK).

Gravy Basket is a destination and Buttons is a sea witch and there is educational stabbing. Buttons is then a bird because of the BDSM lesbians.

There is a lady who is extremely beautiful and intimidating and powerful and she has twenty husbands and I assumed incorrectly that you were all talking about a Jack Russel terrier.

Let's start with the controversy! Izzy. Secondary protagonist or antagonist? Good or bad? Kindly father figure or homoerotically charged friend? Necessary death or not? No no no. Behold:

I present a new question, a hot take sizzling from the pan: Did Izzy really exist?

Personally, I firmly believe that no, he did not. I believe that the rum on the ship was spiked with hallucinogens.

Izzy was simply the manifestation of Ed's Freudian subconscious, taking the shape of a human being, vaguely resembling a humanoid potato Ed was forced to boil as a kid. I was a psychology student with a final grade of 99% and I accept only destructive criticism on my posts thank you. Feel free to discuss whether he boiled the potato in a fit of rage or whether he was forced to.

There are assorted Ned's, Mary's and an uncertain number of Jeff's on ship.

One of the Jeff's is an accountant, and there is a nonbinary talking sword named Jim. Actually I'm not sure if they talk.

Love you all, rooting for the show to be renewed.

REMINDERS. Be polite to each other in the reblogs, on tumblr reblogs spread posts and not likes (which don't do anything for visibility) unlike other social media sites, but MOST IMPORTANTLY.

I ACCEPT ONLY DESTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, THIS BLOG IS A GODLESS, LAWLESS LAND, AND ALL RAGE AT EACH OTHER MUST BE REDIRECTED AT ME. UNDERSTOOD? YAY.

[thegreenleavesofspring]

BEHOLD MY WORKS YE MIGHTY AND DESPAIR

And also kindly disregard the fact that my phone has turned my perfectly normal orange cheddar cheese an unholy yellow. It doesn't actually look like that in person.

And to that one person who said my leaves would be dry (you know who you are): YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WASH THEM, YOU ABSOLUTE HEATHEN. Don't ever trust the packager to do so, haven't you seen the picture of the frog in the salad bag? Also, that's what the apple juice is for. Keeps them pleasantly damp.

Spinach, salt and pepper based seasoning mix, honeycrisp apple, honey ham, and cheddar cheese. Now look me in the eyes and tell me that this would be better with salad dressing on it.

[vaguely-concerned]

BEHOLD! The list of evidence for my bold claim that Pan and Freddie dislike each other ferociously on sight because they are, in some key ways and despite appearances, very similar people: 

- First instinct upon seeing Grace sad is to try to make her laugh to cheer her up. (See: Freddie’s very first lines in the game starting off as she means to go on, and about half the things Pan ever says or does lol. In the last scene with him before The Trial you can even tell him you’re there just because you wanted to talk to him and have something cheer you up.) General sources of levity and fun and play in Grace’s life if you seek them out. 

- They react with similar anxiety to the idea of Grace being really angry with them (Freddie’s surprised/dismayed “Why are you angry at me?!” in the red route of ‘I Can Teach You’, the millenia-old god of the wild hiding behind a tree for ten minutes because he thinks Grace might be about to yell at him lmao <3)

- Both of them seem to have similar interpersonal insecurities in general, judging by the enforced choice between them in ‘I Can Teach You’ (I love you both so much but oh my god. is this a constructive use of time or energy under the circumstances lol), softened and alleviated by the fact that at the end of the day the most important thing to either of them is that Grace is happy. It isn’t possessiveness, but there is an element of underlying ‘Hey. Hey I am your favorite right?? 🥺’ insecurity there that trips them both up to begin with. Once you play the game and go back to look at this scene again knowing everyone’s real motivations, they’re even coming from the same place deep down — genuine fear for Grace’s safety and wanting to help her. (Freddie uncomplicatedly out of love🥹, and Pan at that stage probably more out of a guilty sense of responsibility, though he does seem to take a shine to Grace herself pretty quickly as well. Also he demonstrably isn’t, uh. Completely wrong in saying Freddie’s involvement in this whole mess is likely to end in tears, even if he is being a real dick about it) 

- If you don’t choose either in ‘I Can Teach You’, they both show up within minutes of each other to watch Grace’s back in the Medusa quest anyway. One brain cell ping pong and no one notices because they keep trying to swat each other with the racquets whenever Grace glances away for a second

Sidenote but flirting with both of them one after the other in that quest is fucking hilarious, they’re just taking turns ‘Really? Right in front of my salad?’-ing directly at the camera (...listen I feel that there is a chance that as long as they kept Grace between them the whole time there could be a thing here. I think a possible universe out there where it happens at least once does exist if one cared to go seek it out. That’s all I’m saying.) 

- Seems a bit obvious but what else am I here for: both very drawn to Grace no matter what main trait you choose. Whether this is true vice versa is of course player-dependent, but it is one way you can play the game. 

- Incredibly similar defensive reactions to being picked on or sniped at (and no hesitation whatsoever in subjecting each other to exactly that immediately anyway haha) 

- A bit dark when you think about it, but they both express the sentiment that it would be better for them to step in and die if it means Grace lives. (Freddie very directly of course ;______; and then in ‘It’s time’, Pan in ‘The Trial’ and the little talk you have with him later in Athena’s office.)  

Matching ‘ride or die’ instincts once awoken, is what I’m getting at. Freddie gets extra points for sheer longevity and constancy, Pan gets extra points for getting there in a week. You’re both unhinged (affectionate) 

- They’re the only ones among the main cast wearing green, right? I think I’ve got that right? Well, Charon does too, I suppose, but he’s a bit more peripheral. (Persephone and Aphrodite wear blue-green, but that seems more associated with death and the underworld and the river of grief everyone keeps using as a metaphor throughout the game.) Somehow I find the idea/metaphor that once you get Pan out from under like three layers of bullshit he’s the same colour as Freddie (who is inarguably The symbol of devotion and steadfastness in this game no matter your choices) quite sweet. 

- Nerds. You know I am right. Slightly different kinds of nerd (Freddie is distinctly geek-flavoured and Pan collects rare books for sport sort of distinction), but still. Oh my god. Freddie should get the whole cast together to play D&D in the Reliquary post-game. It would be absolute carnage. It would be glorious hilarity. *GASP* no wait not the Reliquary, let’s go to the Underworld so Charon gets to play too. For the love of all that is good give this to me now please I need it 

- The only two people who think Freddie losing control of her powers and causing a dance number at a funeral is hilarious

In short this is a recognition of the self through the other (derogatory) situation for both of them and neither of them decides to take that with any dignity or grace (ahaha) in the slightest, I love them very much,  thank you and goodnight 

[accihoe]

Meeting The Family

Pairing: 40s!Bucky x fem!reader

Summary: Turn of events, and Bucky is home after the war. He gets to meet Y/N's family, which happens to be his healing.

Warnings: none? Idk Lmk if there's any upsetting stuff that I didn't mention.

A/n: As always, please don't steal my work. Y'all have a nice day now. God bless.

xxxx

"Honey, I'm just popping down to the store for extra candles before my family arrives." Y/N tells her husband. Oh, right, her family is going to be in their home for two. Weeks. James remembers. And not even a small fraction of them.

"Alright, dollface. I'll be here." Bucky answers. Y/N kisses his cheek before leaving. Once she's back, Bucky is stuck between wearing the brown or the green tie. Y/N stands in the bedroom doorframe with a smile, watching her husband get frustrated at the ties. "The brown one is lovely. But green is my father's favorite color." She says.

Bucky decides on the green one with a smile. "You're positive they'll like me?" He asks, going to her. "Buck, I'm positive. Besides, if they want to stay here they'll have to like you." She says. Bucky chuckles. "I still don't know where everyone's going to sleep." Bucky says. "We'll figure that out when they arrive.".

Low and behold, when the family arrives, they're even more than what he expected. Kids, babies, teenagers, uncles, aunts, grandparents, and parents. He stands shyly in the corner as they pile into him and his wife's newly bought lakehouse. Y/N decided that James needed a spot to recover after the war. He didn't mind living on the streets as long as she was by his side.

"Alright everybody gather round then you can go pick your rooms." Y/N claps her hands. Bucky's own hands get sweaty, and his stomach churns as all the people turn towards him. He takes ahold of Y/N's skirt and fiddles with it. "This," she takes ahold of Bucky, "is my husband. James.". Bucky's cheeks flush as they clap hands, and some males wolf whistle.

The people then scurry off to find a sleeping place. "And? By the way, this isn't even half, or a quarter of them." Y/N grins, hugging her husband tightly. "There's so many of them. Very loud. But I like them." Y/N laughs at her husband and kisses his cheek. In half an hour's time, the sleeping arrangements are sorted, and lots of the family have gone down to the lake.

"Think we should join them at some point, love." Y/N says as she finishes cutting the last slice of carrot for the copper penny salad. "I uh.. what about my scars, honey? Won't they upset the children?" Bucky asks. Y/N turns to him, and her heart aches for him. "Jamie," she takes his hands into hers, "no. They will not. They might ask questions, especially the adults, so be prepared. But I'll be there all the way.". Bucky smiles in relief and leans down to give his wife a sweet kiss.

After a while, Y/N and James join the members at the dam, giving James a chance to meet and greet those who aren't in the water. He looks dashing in his swim trunks and his terry cloth shirt (long sleeved to cover the arm). Once he's greeted all those on land, he stands on one side as Y/N chats to someone he assumes is her cousin.

"Hey, what you waiting for, my love? Go swim." Y/N startles James slightly, which makes her giggle, but her heart aches at the same time for him. "I don't feel like it sweets." He tries to lie, but Y/N gives him a pointed look. "Come on, my darling. Join me, please? I promise I'll make it worth your while." Y/N pleads, batting her lashes at Bucky.

Bucky put chuckles and nods, taking her hand. "Alright. Let's go.". At dinner time, after James said Grace, the family is all together (those who are there) and asking him questions. Bucky finds himself happier with each question asked. Although the war topic stings, their genuine care and respect, especially for those lost at war, soothes the sting when they ask questions related.

At the end of the night, as Bucky lays next to his wife in a spot he'd never thought he'd sleep in his own house, he feels contentment. "I like your family a lot." He whispers. "That's great, because they love you." She whispers back. "Perhaps we should have waited a while before marryin'. We could have had the fam there too." Bucky whispers. "We have them here now." Y/N says, kissing her husband's nose, that is tinted red from the sun.

"Would you do that thing you do, doll, where you tickle me a bear or something?" Bucky asks. Y/N giggles quietly, and to James's surprise, reaches for his left arm instead. Y/N traces her finger around his palm, saying some things Bucky can't hear over the pounding of his heart.

Y/N notices his discomfort and gets his attention by bringing the silver knuckles to her lips and kissing each one of them. Bucky's lips part in surprise. "When I say that I love you, I mean that about every inch of you." Y/N whispers. Before she knows it, her husband is pulling her into a tight hug and kissing feather light kisses all over her face.

Once they pull apart, Y/N cups James's cheek, swiping away a wet trail with her thumb. "Welcome to the family, honey.".

xxxx

Fin. As literally every other BB works, I want to make this a series. Should I?

[jadagul]

Behold: the Biblically Accurate Angel Food Cake!

(Inspired by https://www.instagram.com/p/C3djEWBSA8K/ )

Today was my Second Annual Bad Idea Potluck. I make things that I know are great but can't convince other people to try, and also things that sound horrifying but I'm morbidly curious. Other creations from today:

Chicken and vegetable aspic:

Ham salad:

Tomato Soup Cake, from Dylan Hollis. Voted "most better than it sounds."

Bean Pie, also from Dylan Hollis:

A savory feta cheesecake, with a recipe from Cato:

And honeyed mushrooms from Apicius:

I also made a couple loaves of bread:

Old Fashioned and Manhattan jello shots (Old Fashioned was too strong but the Manhattan was great):

and a bizarre cocktail called the Death Flip (which was truly great, do recommend if you like that sort of thing).

Extremely fun party; will do again.

[seangelfish]

A/N: This is a reupload from my old blog, but I have rewritten some things here and there so the story will flow better. Added more fluff into it too, hehe~ I love Jun sooo much. He's a sweetheart. A perfect lover if I say so myself. I hope to write more fics around him, it's what he deserves.

"Alright, I'll just pay for the bill."

Jun Sazanami x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 1,385

Plot/summary: Inspired by one of Jun’s idol stories! After a long day at work, you decide to grab a bite from the cafeteria. However, you didn't have money on you, but lo and behold, here comes your saviour...

“Thank you for your work today, (Y/N)!” exclaimed Hinata, jumping into your arms.

“Yes, thank you!” Yuta followed suit. “Have a good rest of your day!”

The twins had you in their grasp, jumping up and down.

“You two do know that you shouldn’t show affection like this to your producer, right?” you scolded, but at the same time, you just couldn’t help but hug them back.

“Hehe, sorry producer!” said Yuta.

“We will do it again!” cheered Hinata.

“You mean you won’t do it again,” you said with a sigh.

The twins bid you their farewells as they exited your office. Packing up your belongings, you were just glad that the day was coming to an end. You were dreaming of heading home and going to sleep, but before you did that, you decided to grab something to eat in the cafeteria. Your stomach had been grumbling for a while now.

You scanned the menu, wondering which meal you should order. Perhaps you should try something new or maybe it’s best to just go for the usual…

“Time for food!" Jun muttered to himself excitedly. "It's the only thing I expect during all these harsh trainings~ What should I have? ...Huh?"

Jun caught sight of you deep in thought, your thumb underneath your chin as you debated on whether to get a sandwich or a salad.

He began to approach you from behind, chuckling to himself.

Maybe I should get the salad… you thought. Should I get dessert too or—

Suddenly, you felt a pair of hands clasp your shoulders and a voice that whispered, “Nice to see you here too.”

“AHH!” you screamed as you whipped around to face the prankster. “J-Jun?!”

“What are you getting?" he asked, laughing at your reaction. "Let's eat together."

Whilst the cashier took Jun's order, you rummaged in your bag, trying to find your wallet.

"Yeah, I'll just get it with a meal," said Jun. "Thanks."

However, it became increasingly clear that you didn't have your wallet with you. You turned to Jun who picked up his receipt. He didn't notice the sullen expression on your face until you tugged on his sleeve.

"Hmm? What is it?" he asked.

You didn't want to answer him with your words as you were ashamed of asking him directly to cover your costs. You thought of just going home to eat instead.

"Did you forget your wallet?"

Eyes locked with his, you slowly nodded your head.

He smirked. "Well... that's indeed a problem. I'm sorry to hear that..."

You looked away, lips pursed.

"It's okay," you said quietly. "I'll just go home—"

"You wanted a salad, right?" He turned to the cashier once again. "Hi, I'd like to order the salad too, please. Yeah, the one that comes with the meal. Oh, and..."

You watched him in astonishment and gratefulness. Due to the fact you were so embarrassed for even thinking of getting Jun to pay for your meal, some of the words he was uttering became muffled.

"Yes, thank you," he said, taking another receipt from the cashier. He stuffed it into his pocket. "So... alright, I'll just pay for the bill. You can pay me back later, okay?"

You looked at him with glassy eyes.

"H-Hey!" he exclaimed. "I was joking, alright? I won't just abandon you here...!"

You nodded.

Jun sighed, but he gave you a reassuring smile.

"It's fine. I'm only doing this for Cos Pro's beloved idol and producer," he said. "Come on, let's find a seat, okay?"

The two of you sat across from each other on one of the empty tables by the windows.

You stared at your food blankly. You felt so ashamed that you didn't have it in you to even take a small bite. Your eyes darted away from your food to Jun. He was looking outside at the amber sunset as he ate. Feeling your gaze on him, his eyes fell on you, resulting in you looking away.

“You don’t need to feel guilty about it, you know?” he said, pointing at your food. “Just eat.”

You hesitated for a moment. You slowly picked up your fork and began to eat. Jun noticed how quiet you were being and it concerned him.

"(Y/N), it's okay," he said softly. "You don't need to be embarrassed. You can pay me back whenever. And as I said before, I was only teasing. I wouldn't just leave you without food especially since you've been busy all day."

"I..." you began. "...Thank you, Jun. I really appreciate it."

He smiled with his cheek resting on his palm.

"Of course."

You looked a bit happier now. You were eating normally too. He was relieved, he liked it better when you were smiling. He really hoped you smiled like that often.

When you worked as a producer, you kept it professional. However, when you worked as an idol, the real you came out. You were so bubbly, jumpy too. Unfortunately, this personality of yours would seep through your producer activities sometimes, and you would end up annoying Eden for help on work. Jun, however, never minded that you would confide him on such matters. He would help you no matter what.

And today wasn't any different.

You looked up at him and he smiled wider. "How's work for you nowadays?" he questioned. "I hope Ibara isn't bothering you with too much work."

"He isn't, thankfully," you chuckled. "He's been trying to reduce my workload as a producer. He still wonders why I decided to become both an idol and producer, but... well... it's just something that I wanted to do."

You smiled at him.

"Plus... I get to be with Eden more~!"

He laughed at this, his hand automatically covering his mouth. For some reason, that sentence made him incredibly bashful.

"Well, that's good. We don't want you to be overworking yourself," he replied. Now noticing that you've finished your meal, he continued, "Anyway, how was the food?"

“It was good, thank you!” you exclaimed. “I promise to pay—"

But before you could finish your sentence, the cashier approached your table and placed down a plate of cake.

"Enjoy," they said, making their leave.

You looked at Jun in confusion, but he was just smiling at you.

"You wanted dessert, didn't you?"

You couldn't believe it. Jun had paid for your meal AND ordered you dessert? So, that's what he was asking the cashier for...

"I noticed how much you like your desserts here," he added. "So, I thought to buy you one. Don't worry, I won't charge extra."

"Jun, you're so nice!" you cried, already digging in. "Thank you so much! I promise to pay you back immediately!"

As you scooped up a piece of cake, Jun grabbed your hand and moved the spoon into his mouth.

"What? I paid for it," he teased.

Smiling, you scooped up another spoonful and tried feeding it to him in retaliation.

"What?" you teased back. "You paid for it."

But as you watched him shyly back away, his cheeks hinting a light shade of pink, you started blushing too.

"J-Just eat your cake, (Y/N)..."

Once you were finished, you helped Jun clean the table.

"You know what?" he said, pushing his chair back to its place. "I change my mind. It's my treat. Don't worry about paying me back."

"What?"

He walked over to you. With a napkin, he wiped off the frosting on your lips. You blushed at this action, but you didn't stop him from doing so. It felt nice being cared for like this.

"Buuut," he began. "You could pay me back another way... Hmm... let's hang out tomorrow... at the arcade. I'm free after five."

You grinned and nodded.

“Yes, let’s hang out!” you chirped.

He walked you to the bus stop. When your bus pulled up, you tiptoed to his height and kissed his cheek.

"(Y-Y/N)?"

"Thanks for today," you said, beaming. "I enjoyed being with you."

You skipped into the bus and seated yourself down. You waved at him from the window, and he returned the wave with ease.

You were looking forward to seeing him again tomorrow, but it seemed like he was more excited. He couldn't stop himself from smiling, thinking of you and the little kiss you gave him.

Intro page | Ensemble Stars masterlist | Rules

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine the white beard pirates doing a cheesy crew costume

During a failing brainstorming meeting

Ace: uck, who decided that the yonkos should have a crew costume competition every year, Big mom always wins any ways. They're an entire family of theater nerds, and logia users, of course they're going to win.

Marco: It's a tradition Roger started, and there was once an attempt to stop having them, but King's assistant single-handedly secured its continuation by asking if pulling out of the competition would be forfeiting, because all four four of the captains refuse to forfeit. And they did entirely to spite King, who hates the competition, because be has to participate. *Crumples a sketch into a ball and torches it in his fist*

Izou: He deserved it too, from what I hear, but thankfully the other crews aren't much competition though, Kaido always does and animal or monster theme. Shanks's crew can barely scrounge together costumes. And both of them are usually only there for the food and booze.

Thatch: And pops is always so challenging to clothe, since we don't have a place to store lots of fabric. Plus he's too frugal to let us go all out on a costume for him.

You: I have an idea, and I know pops already has a bunch of the clothes we can use for his costume. All we'd need is a pops-sized plastic apron, plastic gloves, and a paper hat. And we could use the project I've been working on.

Izou: *looks over at you slowly, and without blinking, to emphasize his judgement* and what would we be going as?

You: so I think it's time I show you my project.

At the storage room you've converted into a crafts area

You: Behold... bread

Marco: *starts laughing* because's he's looking at two giant plushies that look like slices of bread*

You: yes, there's even a pad of butter pillow *whips it out and chucks it onto the bread* I stuffed it with your feathers.

Thatch: ooh, is this what you were doing with that fabric?

Izou: here I was thinking you were making clothing with that hideously colored fabric. That's a relief, but I still don't get it.

You: imagine pops in a polo shirt, khaki pants, wearing a plastic apron, a paper hat, and plastic gloves holding bread.

Izou: right...and why is pops dressing like a deli worker making a sandwich? What would we even use to go in the sandwich.

You: .... *grins evilly at him*

The day of the costume event

Whitebeard: *excitedly bouncing in his chair and is already wearing his costume* we'll arrive shortly, is everyone ready.

You: *dressed as a slice of tomato* no, they're still trying to wrestle Izou into his jam jar costume...oh there he is

Izou: *waddling around the costume* Look at me, I look ridiculous*

Thatch: *dressed as a bottle of Cesar salad dressing with fake little knives glued in it, like it's being stabbed* No you don't, you look adorable. *boops his nose*

Ace: *dressed as a slice of thick cut salami* Alright let's do this

Whitebeard: *uses the two slices of bread to pick the three of you up, and holds you aloft as he walks off the boat* who wants a sandwich!

The crew: *all dresses as condiments and sandwich fixings flood off the ship to meet up with the other crews*

Izou: *smooshed up against you, is wearing a deep frown and glaring at you,* I'm going to hold a grudge for this....

Ace: oh look Kaido picked to make their theme zombie animals this year!

You: *tries to distract Izou* hehe, and big mom and her kids are dressed as a chicken and a brood of chicks.

Whitebeard: *spends the day scooping up each of his sons and carrying them around in the bread*

Commissions

[michimonie]

Idk if I've posted any of these before, but anyone want a few recipes from my old Disney recipe book?

(Disney Recipes: From Animation to Inspiration)

For example...

Uncle Scrooge's Golden Risotto

Left Page

"Gold and more gold! Look at it, touch it, and if you can't get enough of it, try eating it! Gold is Uncle Scrooge's main preoccupation, as he counts and recounts his vast fortune, more than "three acres of money" to be exact. Beholding a dish of this golden yellow risotto, we're sure the old miser's eyes would sparkle with joy. The dish blended with saffron, the spice worth its weight in gold, and served with a crowning touch of edible gold on top. The soft, warm glow this elegant dish provides is proof of your great generosity towards friends and family, a sign of how much you care."

"And I like to dive around my money like a porpoise..."

---

Right Page

HOW TO MAKE IT

4 Servings 1 Hour Preparation Time

INGREDIENTS

6 cups - low-salt vegetable broth 1/2 teaspoon - saffron threads 2 tablespoons - unsalted butter 2 tablespoons - extra-virgin olive oil 1 medium onion, finely diced 1 pounds - arborio rice 1/2 cup - dry white wine 3 ounces - parmesan cheese, freshly grated 1 piece - edible gold* salt and pepper to taste * Edible gold is available in specialty gourmet shops and fine bakeries.

Being vegetable broth and saffron to a boil; then reduce to a simmer and proceed to the next step.

Melt 1 ounce of butter and olive oil in a pan. When butter begins to sizzle, add onion and sauté until translucent.

Add rice and saute until coated and somewhat translucent, about 5 to 6 minutes. Slowly add wine. Stir in a single direction until most of the wine has evaporated.

Add a ladleful of stock. Continue to stir in the same direction until incorporated. Do not add more stock until the previous amount has been completely absorbed. Continue until all of the stock has been used and/or the rice is al dente, about 10 to 15 minutes from the start.

Remove pot from heat and add final ounce of butter and Parmesan cheese. Shred the "gold" over the top just before serving.

MENU IDEAS

You might preface this dish with a salad with "Bambi and Thumper's Green Goddess Dressing" and follow up with "Esmeralda's Turkey Piccata."

VARIATIONS

Add fresh peas or quickly sauteed asparagus tips to your risotto just prior to serving, for additional texture, flavor, and visual appeal.

SERVING SUGGESTIONS

Refrigerate leftover risotto in a flat plate or pan. The next day, cut into shapes and sauté in olive oil. Serve in any number of ways: alone as a quick appetizer, as an entree with a light stew poured over the top, or simply alongside fried eggs for a rich, extra special breakfast.

WHAT CHILDREN CAN DO

With parental supervision kids can help stir the risotto or, using safety scissors, they can help cut the "gold" foil into little strips to decorate the top of the risotto before it is served.

[sirclitoressa]

Gwendoline Christie Meme Masterpost

since this is my fixation now, and there are definitely more coming. most of these have 6ish pics but i have named each after one in its set. i am very meticulous in my choices (very arbitrary and just sitting here chuckling) <3 enjoy!

ps if you aren't looking for something specific, i tag them all #shitpost

Lucifer Morningstar

born to die world is a fuck

pronouns

blood orange

mazikeen is a simp

semper ubi sub ubi

weird kinks

right in front of my salad,,,

mouse peepee

move im gay

farts

original sin

i eated god

gay sex

nullae puellae?

devils doorbell

i love lucy

Larissa Weems

larissa is a menace

valentino bag....will to live?

road work ahead

im feel so normal

poor little meow meow

boob

are straight people ok

eldritch rage

you...don't do that?

👁️👄👁️

behold my balls

wee(m)zer

anons

birthday

what i dont have tumblr

live laugh lonely larissa

particularly skanky

they don't know i'm a lesbian

wednesday miscalculates

lavender oat milk latte

um well im british

charge ur vibrator larissa

beep beep bitch im gay

Jane Murdstone

in a way that matters

gay sex you say?

hate crimes

Jan Stevens

im ovulating

Captain Phasma

star sign

Miranda Hilmarson

germanic warrior with helmet

uppy mommy

Multi

explain yuri to larissa (larissa, lucifer, jan stevens)

misc part 1 part 2 (lucifer, jan stevens, larissa)

no thoughts head empty (larissa, lucifer, jane murdstone, miranda hilmarson)

i camt read (larissa + lucifer)

safety first (larissa x lucifer)

ever since i was a little girl

valentines

[yarnnerdally]

I cooked 3.5lbs of chicken yesterday. I had a serving. Have salad stuff ready to go for having more of it today for dinner.

Lo and behold: my roommate and his cousin ate the rest of it. -.-'

Just. Why. WHY. I have nothing else thawed out. And I worked 9 hours today and the last thing I want to do is cook but I don't have money for eating out.

[zlidestuff]

People in my vicinity occasionally fall victim to my experiments. Behold... I turned #sketchsaturday into a sketch-salad-day! And yes, my puns are awful.. :D

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Hi! Hello! I heard you wanted some requests! So, may I request the SDV bachelors with a crush or S/O who is coeliac? Basically, they're allergic to gluten and it can make them very sick if they eat it. Cross contamination is also a big issue (spoon touch bread -> spoon touch salad -> can't eat salad)!

Hope this isn't a bad ask! Have a lovely week! :]

Hi Snake, glad to see you in my askbox! 👋

And don't worry, that's a pretty good question. I hope you like this silly HC. Have a lovely week as well 😊

Alex:

Alex always reminds his grandmother about Farmers' gluten intolerance, as Evelyn often cooks pies, donuts, and other sweet pastries for a visiting guest at their house.

Paranoidly checks all utensils the Farmer will eat and drink with, making sure the cutlery has not previously touched wheat bread or similar food.

Fast as lightning, he is ready to carry the Farmer in his arms to Harvey's clinic if they get sick from accidentally eating bread.

Alex keeps track of his diet, because he is going to become a sports star, so if the Farmer wants, he will help with the diet (in consultation with Dr. Harvey, of course).

Although sometimes it is difficult for him to refuse the delicious pastries of his granny.

The Farmer doesn't want Alex to limit himself in this, but the athlete is seriously worried about the health of his friend (crush)/partner.

George benefits from it all ("More food for me!" "Grandpa...")

Elliott:

Oh goodness! Elliott didn't know about it.

But it's good that the Farmer told him about their gluten intolerance. He would not want to hurt his close friend because of his and ignorance.

"Excuse me, my friend, I'll leave you for a moment. Make yourself at home in my little cabin."

Elliott ran as fast as he could towards the Saloon.

"Gus, emergency! The table for two is still stands, but gluten-free meals must be served! This is important! Don't even touch the baked goods please, I beg you! I can't let them go to the hospital because of me, I can handle it if something bad happened to them! Goodness me!"

Gus knew from the first minute that the dishes needed to be served gluten-free, but the emotional writer still continued to punish himself for not knowing about Farmer's illness.

"He's a fine drama actor, alright" Gus thought, pretending he was still listening to the dramatic writer.

Elliott is willing to sacrifice his favorite crab cakes to keep the Farmer happy and healthy.

"I can make them without flour, just have something to replace."

"Gus, why didn't you say that! Then I order, for me and my partne-, I mean, a good friend! Oh, marvelous!"

Any whim at your expense, Mr. Writer.

Sam:

The Farmer has never eaten pizza?!

Sam is saddened by the realization that because of the coeliac, the Farmer is unable to taste the food of the gods, the great invention of mankind, the food without which almost none of his rehearsals with Abigail and Sebastian take place.

"Dude, it's just pizza." "Just pizza?! Seb, how can you say that!"

But without pizza-drama, Sam is now very careful about this information.

He doesn't give the Farmer any snack that has gluten in it.

Sam will tell his mom about it, in case the Farmer comes to visit and the musician himself is not there.

He also asks her if there is a recipe for gluten-free pizza.

"Because man, pizza is a great human creation that everyone need to try. And no intolerance should prevent people from being happy!"

(Sammy, it's just pizza)

Luckily for him, Jodi just happened to have a gluten-free recipe book. And, lo and behold, the pizza recipe is there too!

Jodi made it especially for the Farmer, as the Farmer is also her friend, a real sweetheart, and Sam seems to like them a lot ;) ("Mom!")

The pizza was really tasty. And the Farmer can safely eat it with Sam without fear for their health.

Indeed, the food of the gods!

Harvey:

Oh, Harvey understands Farmer very well. And not only as their doctor, but also as another person who doesn't tolerate gluten.

Friend or partner, he will never forget this when cooking if the Farmer dropped by to visit Harvey. He also doesn't forget about this when dispensing medicines and vitamins if the Farmer has caught a cold or other illness.

If they feel bad about accidentally eating a cookie, then Harvey will immediately come running to their call.

No wonder Harvey is very concerned about Farmer's health - he's a doctor after all, and the effects of coeliac can be very unpleasant (and sometimes life-threatening).

He still doesn't ever lose his temper if there's an emergency, so Harvey's friend (or spouse) is in safe hands.

The doctor is sorry that this disease is incurable. But it's not even that he and the Farmer can't eat pastries (Harvey dislike sweets and pies anyway, preferring vegetables and healthier food). It's just that even the slightest touch of your cutlery with gluten food can provoke an exacerbation of symptoms.

But he will keep an eye on this as often as possible, and the Farmer will also remind Harvey of this if he gets busy and accidentally reaches for a box of biscuits in Pierre's store, confusing it with a box of rice.

Shane:

Coel-what? Can you repeat again?

It took Shane a little longer to figure out what the disease was. So the Farmer can't eat anything with gluten or they'll get sick?

"...Listen, I recently had a burger and pizza in the Saloon, and my hands are still a little dirty after eating. Should I move away from you?"

Shane immediately moved a meter away from the Farmer when they confirmed that cross contamination could also be a problem.

The Farmer feels guilty after this, but Shane told them not to worry about it. After all, it is not their fault that they are gluten intolerant.

"Maybe I fucked my own health, but I don't want to harm other people's health. I'm not a complete asshole."

Before meeting with the Farmer, he began to wash his hands more often.

Sometimes he will defend the Farmer at the fair if someone persistently offers the Farmer to taste the pastries.

Also, eggs don't contain gluten, so they can make a good launch for a guest who comes to Marnie's Ranch (or for a spouse's breakfast)

His chickens will never let you down. Good girls!

Sebastian:

"Oh, sorry..."

"Sebby, what are you sorry for?"

Well, doesn't that mean it will restrict his friend the Farmer from growing certain crops, like wheat, for example? It's just... sad.

Moreover, he just wanted to invite the Farmer to his basement for another Solarion Chronicles: The Game with snacks. But Sam always brings pizza and Abigail brings blueberry cobbler...

No, he doesn't want it to limit his friendship with the Farmer because of that. Therefore, Sebastian still invites the Farmer, promising that he will arrange everything.

Fortunately, Sam and Abby were sympathetic to the situation and prepared gluten-free snacks, since there was a lot of choice.

Although Sam was still a little dramatic. "They've never had pizza?! It's -" "Sam, shut up already."

The board game sessions were just as fun, and the seeki were delicious too.

Sebastian will now henceforth remember Farmer's coeliac. He also wanted to ask them out on a date- uh, he mean just have some fun time in the Saloon, play pool, maybe walk around the city after...

"A night with billiards and no pizza? Is this even legal? :D" "SAM!!!"