#bending without breaking

[thergbvision]

After years of questioning, gaslighting (from others and myself), and feeling like I was just being “too sensitive,” I finally have a name for what’s been happening to my body: Hypermobility Spectrum Disorder (HSD).

My rheumatologist believes it may actually be hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (hEDS), but due to the diagnostic overlap and current criteria, I’m officially diagnosed with HSD for now. I scored 7/9 on the Beighton Scale, and for once, a medical professional looked at my history and actually listened.

It’s incredibly validating—but also a lot to process. I had physical therapy today, and after I shared my diagnosis, my PT adjusted our entire approach. He introduced me to a low-impact strength training program made specifically for people with hEDS/HSD called Bending Without Breaking, I believe? (Which is such a good name, honestly.)

Turns out, my core is way weaker than I realized. I’ll definitely be feeling today’s session later… but it feels like the right kind of hard. The kind that means I’m actually working with my body now instead of fighting it.

Since I can’t take NSAIDs because of my bariatric surgery, the only medical treatment I’m on now is gabapentin; at six times the dose my psych originally prescribed for anxiety. It’s wild how pain management is often trial and error, especially with conditions like HSD.

I also have blood tests coming up, some routine, some autoimmune panels I’ve never had done before. I can feel my B12 is probably low, and my protein intake hasn’t been ideal lately. I’m anxious about what those labs will show… or won’t show. But either way, I’m doing what I can.

This diagnosis doesn’t change who I am or magically make things easier, but it does lift this unbearable weight I’ve been carrying, like I finally have permission to stop doubting myself. I shouldn’t need a diagnosis to feel valid, but after so long, it means everything.

Here’s to healing, to answers, and to not bending until I break.

[the-effect-of-chaos]

So I have been reading "My Loneliness is Killin Me (Baby)" and it has been stirring up my desire to write an Omegaverse cannon Divergence Steddie fic like gasoline thrown on a already lit bonfire.

So OF COURSE that means I have to brainstorm this fucker somewhere so I am taking you along for the ride.

We are making Omegaverse weird again and going back to the foundations of the genre. Slick butts. I love the new (I know not really new but still) take on Omegas and Alphas being intersex, and I certainly enjoy reading them but I have a craving that will not be denied so back to slick butts and butt babies we go. I have my reasons for this and it also relates to female alphas not having a Knot but a Lock (this comes from a conversation with my dearest friend Fishie a good few years ago about a series of books that use this concept that has never left my head)

Steve is a late bloomer, he has been unpresented through nearly all of high school and while he was with Nancy. Everyone is adamant his body is just biding its time before flooring him with a presentation rut the size of America because they are so certain he will be an Alpha.

Cue them all being wrong.

Post Season 2's week from hell for Steve, between his heart getting shattered, meeting and bonding the Party (his puppies), dealing with the Demodogs, followed by the plate to the head concussion and protecting the pups in their hairbrained plans for the tunnels. It should come as no surprise when he is thrown into the most painful presentation heat of the fucking century.

Following a second week from hell for Steve that was his heat, once he is lucid enough to breathe, think, and not just be trapped in heat and dreams (nightmares so many goddamn nightmares) his goes hunting for a solution to the nightmares.

Obviously that is going to inevitably lead him to Eddie. Eddie who is parked up after school off road in the woods on the trail towards Skull Rock and Lovers Lake.

I feel what is most natural to happen is something akin to Hidden in the Woods by @thepossummoldypasta EXCEPT as fairytale and incredibly cute as that fic is and you should absolutely go read the fuck out of it!!! my take will be different but the scenario similar.

Cue Eddie unintentionally getted dragged into Steve Harrington's life and the aftermath of UD shenanigans well before Spring 86.

I am considering the following possibilities as well for shits and giggles (I say considering like the liar I am all of the below will be appear):

Accidental temporary bonding (likely through being scent mates and getting scent drunk on a newly presented Omega/ the first Alpha scented post presentation heat)

The revelation of Steve's no good very bad never around Parents. And a whole lot of their treatment leading Steve to have issues with following his instincts. Because he was never taught, he never learned and now he is the complete opposite designation everyone and their dog seemed to be manifesting for him. Despite that he loves being Omega solely for the knowledge he can now have and build that family he's always dreamed of and he doesn't actually need anyone else to make it happen if need be (he will have pups with or without a mate social expectations be fucking damned, he was raised to be an Alpha so is very much aware of all he needs to protect himself and any puppies he has and not to mention raise any alphan pups on his own).

Since this is pre Robin the equally as heartbreaking revelation that Steve Harrington has no Pack besides the 3 puppies he adopted on sight during his first week from hell in 84. (Don't worry the other 3 puppies come later they are not safe from adoption).

Non-sterotypical A/B/O actions from Steve as an Omega*. I personally headcannon that Omegas are prone to going absolutely feral in the protection of their loved ones or pups. Like put an Omega’s pups into danger and they will rip, tear, scratch, spit and bite. They will fight as dirty and as scrappily as they need to in the defence of those they consider their own. * Additionally I like to hc that Omega’s obviously do not always come as the more petite or fragile even if that may be what is considered the most conventionally attractive socially. So let your omegas be built heavier, they are the capable of carrying pups after all, so they can have wider hips and thicker thighs but also broader shoulders for being able to physically carry the pups too. Let them be strong and capable.

Now with the above that means I also am considering to have bumbling over the top mother henning Steve while he gets used to his more over powering instincts. This means none of the pups are safe from forced grooming sessions and constant scenting and sometimes when required cuddle piling. Stevie boy is going to be completely succumbed to feeding and providing for all the kids much to the amusement of most of their parents (Ted Wheeler can go jump).

Dustin is going to cop it the worst, enter Claudia Henderson who takes one look at Steve and just force adopts him. They have a guest room that sits vacant and is more a storage space then anything, she starts cleaning it out the minute he leaves her place for the first time since she met him. Dustin both loves this idea and hates it because his mom is just as bad as Steve is without the instinctual driving force, so the idea of them all living together is both incredibly warm and cosy but also startlingly smothering (don't worry Dustin, Steve will get better once his new instincts and hormones settle down.)

Upside down fam wise I am adding Claudia and Wayne to the mix of genuine adults in the know. FIRSTLY In this fic-to-be Claudia is a former ER Doctor turned ObGyn, turned NICU nurse because the stress of the job got to her especially with all of Dustin's health scares as a kid. Therefore my reasoning is the UD fam need an on call medic who actually knows what the fuck they are doing. SECONDLY Wayne is potentially a Korean (will have to check dates and do some age calculations) AND Vietnam War Vet, he knows his fucking shit about war, about fighting in unfamiliar territory etc. Also I just want more adults who care about Steve in the know and able to support him. Don't get me wrong I Fucking ADORE Hop as Steve's Dad and I may have plans to include that too, but my boy needs all the adults love and guidance he can get.

And because I am an absolute WHORE for angst with a happy ending and hurt/comfort there will be plenty of emotional turmoil, physical Steve whump (he looks soo pretty covered in blood), mental and emotional torture followed by so much love - platonic, romantic, familial you name it.

It will probably be mid to slow burn Steddie if I am honest even with the accidental bonding. That is just going to force them into constant close proximity. They will dance around each others feelings for a while all whole procrastinating breaking the bond because if they are honest neither of them wants to. But I am too impatient to drag that shit out to season 4 events, so Eddie will likely lose his shit while Starcourt is happening and when he finds Steve probably while they are throwing fucking fireworks at the Mind Flayer, is going to stop the dancing real fucking quick when they are outside with the EMTs.

E:"I almost lost you tonight"

S: "I mean yeah but I'm fine?"

E: "Like hell you're fine Princess! You were fucking trapped and tortured by Russians and I would never have known what happened."

S "is this about the bond nearly breaking?"

E: "Yes this is about the bond nearly breaking sugar!"

S: "Sorry, I know they said it would hurt a bit but I figured it would be worth it for the freedom it would give-"

E: "and what if I don't want that hmm? What if I am happy with the way things are going?

[Cue Eddie's rambling fired up angry flustered confession that leaves Steve winded but warm. He never thought Eddie could ever really want him as a proper bondmate after they accidentally trapped themselves into a scent induced bonding. There will be confessions on both sides of long distance interest, yearning and pining since like they were puppies themselves because I can't help myself so I shall indulge myself decadently with all my favourite headcanons and tropes.]

And to finish off this 2 hour fucking ramble in the early hours of the morning, it will be titled Red Strings.

Because I am a romantic and live for soulmate content so I will be absolutely indulging in that too.

And if they end up with little red tattoo like marks that are two halves of a whole that appear when they accidentally bond well that's for me to know and you to find out.

UNTIL THEN I NEED FUCKING SLEEP!

[okaydays22]

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

Dude I forgot Antonia was a canon character and went insane looking for her on your OC page RIP 😭

BAHAHA OMG THAT MEANS SHE'S MINE NOW!!!!! /j

But this is what happens when you invest more life into side characters than canon will ever have the chance to -_-)/

[dullahandyke]

*wakes in a cold sweat* woman made of electricity barely contained within her clothes x roboticist wearing rubber gloves

[fixation-central]

he is made of love you cowards

[ghost-of-you]

5sos: puts HBG on the dice

5sos: has to play HBG

5sos: surprised pikachu face

No because those men took a glorified beach ball the size of Luke, slapped a song they actively hate and they think we like because of the chanting (hbg), 2 songs a lot of people talk about in social media and we do actively like (wayf and iydk), a song they never played before that is somewhat popular on 5sostok for conspiracy theories about who it is about (ela) and 2 songs I have no idea how even ended up on the mix (voodoo doll and heartache) and decided that literally throwing that in the audience would be a great idea. A tour doesn't need a surprise song, they made a conscious decision of making the dice, then they pick the songs on said dice and go all when it lands on half of them.

Like dudes what the hell did you think was gonna happen? That you could cheat your way into not playing it the whole tour? If you don't want to play the song don't make it an option, is not like y'all are not pretending half your discography doesn't exist, put hbg in that box and tell the people chanting for it to get over themselves. It's your show, you make the rules. If you hate a song don't fucking make it an option.

[jackshiccup]

was reading hijack before bed and fell asleep on my glasses and now i’ve woken up to find them all wonky….

[charmac]

Part of why I love ur fic so much is that Mac and Charlie fit so well as millennials/gen z without changing too much of their characters but Dennis and Dee could never!! Crotchety middle aged trash twins for life!! Idk if this makes sense but you just nailed it man

Yes! 100% makes sense and also why I feel that it works so well as an AU that can stay more-or-less close to current canon.

When you take a character out of their time, de-age or whatever, it sometimes comes at the cost of their character development as we know them, since time and aging is a pretty huge factor in evolution, but Mac (and Charlie) are weird exceptions to this, because their character development has very little to do with their age (they really haven't aged in their own minds) and almost everything to do with how their circumstances change over the course of the show.

Mac didn't have to get older to come out. There was nothing about him maturing mentally or physically that cause him to accept himself. It only took him so long because the Gang enabled him for years, let him hide and pretend because they didn't want to deal with it. So if you speed up that timeline, face Mac with the fact that he's gay early on (make it so there's a reason he can't run away), you can basically take any plot from S1-16 and apply it to a young Mac and find that it's pretty much in character.

I think with Dennis, it's clear why if you de-aged him you wouldn't be able to achieve canon Dennis past a certain season. So much of his character development and evolution is based in him grappling with growing older. Physically being older hurts him in a lot of ways, but it also helps him grow and understand who he is and how to mask himself even better (which could be for worse).

Dennis has to age to face his demons, Mac has to be taught to face his. Though, does facing their demons mean they concur them? Or are they devoured to become worse?

[madameocotillo]

Results of my first bend test at welding school! Used GMAW(mig) for the root & FCAW(flux) for the fills/caps, I *almost* ran out of time (4 hour limit) but DIDN'T, and then all four pieces survived the hydraulic press without so much as a hairline crack!!

[tony-andonuts]

So fucking overwhelmed and burnt out man

[brown-little-robin]

What Do You Mean Ritsu Catches TheZombie Disease ?Whgat Do You Meanwhat do youmean whatg do u mean wh

:)

Well, here's the thing. Ritsu thinks Shigeo is no longer contagious. Even though he still has some zombie symptoms, like the misty eyes and the insomnia, he's officially cured. Everyone thinks Mob's symptoms are just leftovers, his body having been changed in ways you can't come back from.

The doctors are wrong. Mob still hosts a living (even thriving) disease colony. It's just that he lived with zombie disease so long that his body stopped fighting to eradicate the disease, and then the cure strengthened his immune system and allowed his body to push back against the disease, prioritizing clearing his brain while allowing the disease to remain part of him. And his disease colony, having the collective intelligence of a colony of bees, adapted to the situation.

Zoom out. Mob is living in a house with Ritsu. They don't really talk but they're in physical proximity. They eat together when they can. You'd think it would just be a matter of time until Ritsu got infected, but actually it didn't have to happen. Ritsu spent months taking care of Shige, Very Aware that he was going to be infected and doom them both if he came in contact with Shige's saliva. Ritsu still has the habits; he's still careful with everything he imbibes. He never drinks out of anything but his water bottle, he never takes food out of anything Shigeo has touched (Ritsu splits their food into separate meals BEFORE eating so that they never share a bowl), and he washes the sink before he uses it, every single time.

Mob doesn't use his old water bottle anymore. He drinks out of regular glasses, and he usually washes them himself. Sometimes he forgets, and then Ritsu steels himself and washes Shigeo's dishes and then washes his hands three times and takes a long bath.

So—it could have continued forever and no one would have known Mob was still contagious, because Ritsu treated him like he was still contagious anyway.

And then. The Big Cleanup arc happens. Ritsu and Kamuro are cleaning up Salt Township one useless delinquent at a time. Ritsu is pretty sure that someone recently tried to use his brother's zombie strength in inter-town warfare, and he is furious. He wishes everyone would forget about Nii-san. Unfortunately, though, in this au, there were witnesses to Teru and Mob's fight—some of the Black Vinegar delinquents were not unconscious for that. The rumors flew, and by the time Big Cleanup gets into full swing, people all around the former Seasoning City area know that there's a zombie kid from Salt who challenged Black Vinegar's secret weapon and won. Is Salt going to become a bandit town like Black Vinegar? They've been a good neighbor to the other fragments of Seasoning City so far, but if they have a zombie who can wreak that much destruction on command...

And the fact that Mob still has zombie symptoms—well. it's an open secret. So when Ritsu hears the rumor from Mezato, he knows perfectly well what's going to happen. People are going to come after his brother preemptively. Worst case scenario, Nii-san is going to get killed. Ritsu starts to consider taking Shigeo and making a run for it—leaving the Seasoning City area altogether, maybe. Striking out on their own again. He doesn't want to do it, but it might be their only chance. He feels rushed. someone could try something at any time.

So. when he hears from Mitsuura (who is essentially the same in this au, just,, a little more ethically questionable due to wanting zombie powers instead of psychic powers,,) that people who have been around zombies for a long time sometimes develop zombie characteristics, he thinks this might be his chance to stall. He thinks if he gets zombie strength, he could pretend to be White T Poison, to distract people from his brother long enough to—do something. figure out some way to protect his brother for real.

(The Awakening Lab kids have had long-term exposure to zombies and basically been immunized to the disease. they have had very, very mild cases and recovered with little damage. Rei Kurosaki can sense the presence of miasma and disease colony drones, for instance. Hoshino has above-average strength; Asahi has a permanent fever that makes him hot to the touch. Asahi in particular recently got bitten and never showed any symptoms. Ritsu watches and absorbs this information with Great interest.)

On Ritsu's way to Mitsuura's lab, which is just a little way outside Salt's territory, Student Council Vice President Tokugawa catches him and asks if he's alright. Tokugawa is perceptive, and although he disapproves of Ritsu and Kamuro's community "cleanup", he's noticed that Ritsu is doing. really bad. lately. He thinks maybe having someone Acknowledge that Ritsu is visibly doing bad and freaking out about his brother will help Ritsu gain some... solidity. Instead of telling Ritsu "stop acting like your brother", Tokugawa tells Ritsu, "Stop trying to take control of everything. You're not in charge of your brother anymore."

And that—that reference to Ritsu's months of caretaking just destroys what's left of Ritsu's desire to be normal. Not in charge of his brother anymore? Not in charge of his brother anymore? How dare he bring that up and suggest Ritsu just get over it? Ritsu's ability to be in control of everything is his best quality, thank you very much.

Ritsu goes to Mitsuura's lab, and then he comes home to find Shigeo asleep on the couch with a nearly empty glass of water by his hand.

Shigeo's not a zombie anymore—Tokugawa was right about that much. Ritsu doesn't have to be afraid of him this time. Ritsu is older, stronger, more in control this time than last time. He can do this.

He drinks the rest of Shigeo's water. On purpose.

(Shigeo's saliva is still contagious. his water has his disease drones in it, ready to clone themselves into a full colony. they find Ritsu's body very hospitable. very familiar. they start replicating the way they worked in their last host's body right away.)

[bisexualdinahlance]

Why are so many people in the fandom (at least from seeing the fics they write) obsessed with breaking up percabeth. Like half the time I see it now isn't even bc they ship either of them with anyone else but they are just.... Breaking them up. Even saw a fic today labeling them platonic soulmates which was just? Weird to me? Like what's the point lol. Especially bc plenty of fics seem to feel the need to justify and point it out and explain it all away too instead of just like not mentioning them having dated or broken up. Idk there's just something weird about it all????

[kostektyw]

for the last couple of weeks or so ive had painted nails and keep immediately repainting them whenever the polish get chipped.

is it bc im feeling fancy or a similar reason? no 💛 i just cant find my goddamn nail clippers 💛

[rhapsodybenny]

I am poorer than I've ever been. Pay me $20, and I'll take the time to explain my new 4th dimensional THING. It's a t h i n g .

It's kind of a 4D mental framework, it's kind of a story idea, it's kind of a new way of packaging/extending the classic "2D-to-3D" analogue, it's kind of a practical method for designing 4D maps for 3D characters, it's kind of horrifying, but best of all, it's DEAD simple to explain with simple stick-figure drawings (and text).

$20 buys you my highest-effort reblog (this post) to date, complete with diagrams.

If you can't afford that but want to help me anyway (I love you), you can give me $5, and we'll figure out something (unrelated to the thing).

[starlit-mansion]

to be honest the other day i saw a post that was like "you've heard of making male characters into butch lesbians, now try making female characters into femme gay queens" and i was like 'i've literally never thought of doing that and i don't actually know if that transitive property works because part of the thing about re-contextualizing male characters is that there's so many more of them as iconic pillars of pop culture with important traits besides their maleness so uh... yeah this seems like one more of those things where people just say the opposite of something for Internet Points" but then i was like "wait no. ariel thelittlemermaid. obviously."