#bitter sweet because this is A BIG ADULT FIRST for me

[simgerale]

we just put a deposit down on a home to rent for a year

[thetriumphantpanda]

i've got my love to keep me warm | joel miller

Summary | Joel agrees to spend Christmas with your family, away from the warmth of Texas, and it takes him a little while to warm up to the idea.

Pairing | Joel Miller x F!reader

Word Count | 1.4K

Warnings | Grumpy x Sunshine vibes, some sweetness, some suggestive thoughts but nothing explicit, mentions of consuming food and alcohol.

Authors note | For @yeollie-plz- It's your @pedrostories secret santa!! I really hope you love this because it was good fun to put together! Happy Christmas to you!

“You know, you could at least pretend to be happy?” You tease, nudging your elbow into Joel’s side.

With the way he’s bundled up in his big coat, you’re not sure he actually feels you do it, but he grumbles all the same. Whatever he says in incoherent, but you can discern the meaning perfectly. What’s the point in being here as grown adults? What’s the point in wandering around, looking at lights and getting excited about Christmas, when, for the first time in years, there won’t be any children around?

“Come on,” You beam, taking his gloved hand in yours, “Maybe a drink with a little something in would make you happier?”

“What would make me happier would be sat indoors outta this snow.”

You roll your eyes, pulling on his hand to get him to follow you. He walks by your side, gloved hand sitting in yours as you weave through the crowds of people. Joel had wanted to stay in Texas for Christmas, something about the familiarity of it, not wanting to spend too much money on travelling at this time of year, but knowing it was his first Christmas without Sarah, now that she was all grown up with her own family, you knew that he’d be miserable, no matter that you’d be there with him, so you’d put your foot down, told him the two of you would spend Christmas with your parents up north, somewhere cooler, more festive.

He’d met them plenty of times before, they loved him, thought the sensible, stoic man was good for you. He had his head on his shoulders, a home of his own - settled, is what they’d called him. A far cry from the other boys you’d chosen in the past few years, and they were overjoyed to have a house full of people this year - your brother and his wife, you and Joel, a real family affair.

The centre of town always reminded you of being a child when you came back at this time of year. The streets filled with small stalls - some selling food, some filled with little trinkets from small businesses, all set around the main square, with its big tree, lit up and sparkling.

There’s one stall you zero in on, a small line that you stand in, still gripping at Joel’s hand as you step further towards the front each time someone walks away. You remember the first time you’d stood in this line - you were eight, and your dad had passed you a cup full of warm hot chocolate, a towering swirl of whipped cream on top. You’d sipped it so slowly, savouring the cream and the sweetness of the chocolate, and anytime you’re here, you have to get it, it’s just that these days, it’s always spiked with something.

Joel, of course, orders an Irish coffee - black, bitter coffee, split with cream and his favourite whiskey. You watch closely as he pulls one of his gloves off with his teeth, slipping it in his pocket so he can feel the warmth of it in his palm. He’s watching you just as closely as the lady hands you the cup of hot chocolate, mixed with Bailey’s, still with that tower of whipped cream too.

You both step away, standing off to the side as Joel takes the first sip of his drink. You can see the slight softening of his expression as he goes in for another sip, this one bigger than the first. He’s watching you as you dart your tongue out, taking some of the sweet cream into your mouth before you sip the drink, hissing when it burns your tongue a little.

“That’ll be hot, baby.” He teases, earning a little glare from you as he drinks his again, seemingly unaffected by the steam that rises from his own cup.

“It’s good,” You muse, holding it out to him, “Try it.”

“I don’t want none a’that,” He shakes his head, “Too sweet.”

“Joel Miller,” You chastise, pushing the cup closer to his face, “It’s Christmas, for the love of God, try the hot chocolate.”

He sighs, shakes his head in that way he always does when he knows he can’t win the battle. He hands you his drink, laughs a little when you wrinkle your nose at how strong it smells, takes yours from you and brings it to his mouth, taking a big sip, and when he pulls it away to hand back to you, you can’t stifle the giggle that falls from your mouth.

“What?” He asks, as your giggle falls into proper laughter, “What the hell’s the matter with you?” He snatches his own drink back sinking his neck down into his coat to keep the biting wind from his skin.

“Y-you’ve,” You choke out, pointing at your own nose, “You’ve g-got something here.”

You bring your hand up to his face, running the pad of your thumb over the tip of his nose, swiping the cream from his face. You go to pull it away, to wipe it away on the leg of your jeans, but Joel has other ideas, gripping your wrist to still you. He brings your hand to his mouth, enveloping your thumb into the heat of his mouth. You suck in a breath, feeling the tip of his tongue dart out against the skin, licking the cream off, before he drags your thumb from his mouth with a soft pop.

He drops your wrist from his hold, but you’re stuck, staring right at him, with the familiar throb of want settling across you.

“Thought it was too sweet for you?” You raise an eyebrow when you’ve composed yourself enough to speak.

He shrugs, takes hold of your hand and starts walking you back towards the tree, “If you’re gonna laugh at me, I ain’t gonna make it easy on you.” That familiar tone of grump is back, but you know he doesn’t mind really as he walks slowly, guiding you both to a bench that looks directly at the tree, dressed in red and gold, icy lights casting that familiar festive glow across everything.

He wipes the snow from the bench, makes sure it dry enough for you both to sit on, draping his arm across the back of it, encouraging you to curl into his side. The two of you sit for a while, watching the people come and go - young children excited to stand in line for the chance to meet Santa in his grotto, men on their own going from stall-to-stall, clearly shopping for last minute gifts, and couples, just like the two of you, wrapped up in nothing but each other as they hold hands, point things out to eat other.

“Thank you for coming,” You speak softly into his shoulder, looking up at him as he looks down at you, “I know it’s not really what you wanted, but I like that you’re here.”

“Of course it’s what I wanted,” He speaks just as softly, leaning down to press a featherlight kiss to the tip of your nose, “I only ever want to be where you are baby,” He motions his head to the scene in front of you, “Even if it is in the freezing cold, surrounded by too many people, wherever I’m with you, I’m happy, okay?”

You smile at him, tilt your head slightly, as his lips come down onto yours, cold and chapped from the winter air, but oh-so familiar as they slant across your own. You open your mouth against his, let your tongue meld with his own, the bitter of his coffee mixing with the sweet of your own drink. It’s soft, gentle, and over far too quickly. He pulls away, places two more soft pecks against your mouth, and then settles back against the bench, his hand now resting on your shoulder.

A shiver settles across your bones, something to do with the fact that even a few years into your relationship, he still sets you on fire without even trying, but mainly because it’s fucking freezing. Leant against Joel’s body, you feel him shiver a little too.

“Home?” You ask.

He looks back down at you, smiling a little with a nod, “Home.”

[syrena-del-mar]

The Nine Circles of Hell: Dead Friend Forever, Episode 7

First, a trigger warning: I'll be discussing themes of revenge porn, grooming, statutory rape, sexual coercion.

I'm going to discuss this episode with as much upmost care as I can, due to the sheer amount of sensitive material that came out of this week's episode I will also not being using any explicit scene screen captures from this episode. If there's anything you'd like to me to take out or want a more in depth conversation, feel free to use either of my message boxes.

Last week I said DFF had more to offer than just being a campy 90s slasher remake. While I first thought we were already in the depths of hell, thematically, with Non getting beaten by the mafia, I didn't expect this week's episode to somehow double that pain. But here we are. I was lulled into false security with the 5 minute montage of getting to know what Phee and Non's relationship was like. I should have remembered that I'm definitely watching the wrong genre when I expected more of those moments.

Non and Phee

This episode really continues and expands the idea that humans are not these clear-cut, unambiguous, good-or-bad beings that idea has now been depicted through Non and his relationship with Phee. Non has so much love to give and so much want for being loved, it's what leads to Phee in the first place, but it's also what leads to his downfall. Because Non loves so much and so hard, it's also why he wasn't ecstatic that Phee had to lie to his father and say that he was involved, just to get him out of trouble with the police. What started like a sweet date turns a bit bitter, because Non is seeing the consequences of his actions not only affect himself but also the others that he loves. It's also why he couldn't tell Phee about the sheer amount he owed Tee's uncle, because he was now well aware that if Phee found out, he would get himself involved.

Non lies and manipulates Phee, he tells him time and time again that nothing happened between him and Mr. Kreng. Non swears to Phee that he isn't lying to him and that he won't keep any secrets from him anymore. It pains him to do so, he's barely holding himself together by the end of a thread thread once he's Phee's arms and his face is hidden from Phee's view. Yet, he does. He keeps it a secret how big of a hole he has found himself in, because he doesn't want to drag Phee down with him. Non says it himself to Jin, he doesn't want to be burden, he'll figure it out himself. It's a direct parallel to the bigger issues that Non is finding himself in beyond just within the 'movie set'. He has the 300 million baht hanging over his head, his parents (in his point of view) regret having him and find that he does is bring embarrassment to the family, and now he has another adult willing to give him the 300 million baht with a fake sense of care. So he found, what he believes to be, a solution that would get rid of the 300 million baht debt and all it requires is giving up a piece of himself, but at least it won't come at a cost of burdening his parents or Phee.

In trying to protect Phee, his lies ends up costing him the one he loves the most, Phee. Now from this point on, this is all speculation, but when Phee accused Non of 'always doing this', I'm not in the camp that believes that Phee is accusing Non about being a serial cheater. I see why people are in that camp, but I initially jumped to that conclusion as well. Now, I'm more in the line that Phee is accusing of Non always feeding him lies, even after explicitly promising him that he wouldn't. After putting his neck out for him, after letting Non do things his way as long as he promised to tell him the truth, Non goes back to telling lies. Phee lashes out, and at the end of the day he's still a teenager, so he hits Non's weakest point. Just get lost and die. The very words that likely haunt Phee in the present-day, now as an adult. And Non's holds the broken bracelet, punishing himself, because he knew that there was no coming back from losing his lifeline.

Non and Mr. Kreng (Please keep my trigger warnings in mind, they will be heavily discussed in this section.)

Statutory Rape. Grooming. Coerced Sexual Relations. Nonconsensual Sex. Molestation. Sexual Assault. Sexual Abuse. Those are all words to describe the relationship that occurred between Non and Mr. Keng. Let's call exactly what it is. I think I'll lose my mind if I have to see someone another person call Non a cheater. There is no cheating when there is statutory rape.

Non is literally at the end of his rope, Mr. Keng clocked that immediately. He knew that Non was isolated, that he was completely othered by his classmates, he believes that Non has nobody else to turn to, and he knows that Non is in deep in a scam that target teens. In his eyes, he found the perfect victim.

Non is taken advantage of by a person in power, a person that he should be able to trust. Non isn't naïve, he clocked that Mr. Keng wanted something from him since the moment they first met. But he is vulnerable. He's being extorted by the mafia and he sees someone offering him the money that he needs to put an end to that. In his eyes, it was a way out, a means to an end that just cost him a piece of his soul. I truly think Non rationalized it to himself as prostituting himself, because he knew that money was never coming without a price. No matter how much Mr. Keng tried to sell it as 'brotherly' love.

But at the end of the day, it does not matter what Non believed or rationalized, because Mr. Keng was the adult in the situation. He had a duty, as a teacher, to protect Non and provide a safe classroom environment. Instead he target, manipulates, and coerces Non into having sexual relations with him. He knows the power imbalance he holds, first as a teacher and then with the 300 million baht he 'gave' him. Mr. Keng, knowing that Non's not close to his 'friends', physically isolates him. He takes him to his office that's half-lit, located in a long hallway with, seemingly, very little foot traffic. He prods at Non, asking what's been bothering him and has him visibly become emotional, before offering his care. He's a complete and utter predator, in every sense of the term.

I hope he dies a long, painful death.

Non and Jin

First and foremost, whether or not Jin was ultimately the one that posted the video does not matter. Filming a classmate being sexually assaulted is still child porn at the very least and, possibly, revenge porn (if he disseminated the video) at the worst. I was on the same boat as @respectthepetty and their take that Jin had to be the worst of them all. Like they said in that post, Jin is a coward and he even admits to it. There's nothing more cowardly than hiding behind a door, filming you supposed 'friend' getting sexually abused by your teacher, and then even considering putting up on social media for revenge because your heart is broken.

Yes, Top framed Non. Yes, Por demanded (and bullied) money from Non. Yes, Tee brought Non to the mafia. Those are all very bad things, don't get me wrong. All the physical and mental abuse they put Non through was hell. Yet, Jin was the only one aware that Non had already been seeing someone, which seemingly had upset him already. Then he sees him with Mr. Keng and instead of reporting that his alleged friend was being assaulted, he gets angry and films Non at his most vulnerable point in life. Even Fluke didn't want any part of that.

Jin takes away Non's dignity. And at the end of the day, it doesn't matter whether he uploaded it online or not, he was still the one to film, transfer that file onto his computer, and contemplate whether he was going to post it or not. At every point since he found that Non and Mr. Kreng were in that room, he rendered Non powerless. That video would have never been uploaded if it hadn't existed in the first place. With just a point of a camera and click of a button, he is revictimizing Non every. single. time. that video is opened and seen by another person.

There are no words to fully describe or explain that kind of trauma that he has subjected Non to.

Final Thoughts

This episode was nauseating. It honestly took me about two hours just to get to the end. Usually, I can watch through a show I enjoy really quickly, but this episode was so hard to digest. And that's simply due to how realistic they are approaching the subject of Non and Mr. Keng.

Barcode and Ta really are the stars of the show. I'm not saying that the other castmates aren't amazing in their roles, but man TaBarcode really know are hitting every single emotional beat. I was never a TaBarcode nor a MacauChay girlie, but man Be On Cloud has truly brought out their best this time around. Even though I fully know we are heading towards an incredibly heart wrenching ending for PheeNon, I can't help but want to hoard and scramble for moments of them together.

It's crazy how well, everyone was able to pull their weight this episode. There were so many moments that with less talented, less experienced actors, could have fallen flat, but they didn't. Ta and Barcode's PheeNon was so incredibly heart-beating, butterfly inducing before we were brought back into their reality outside of their relationship. 2J and Barcode's scenes were.... so disgustingly real, for lack of better words. I knew that storyline was never going to end well but it had been more than I ever expected Be On Cloud to release. They're tackling such real issues that weigh on teens with incredible tact, there's no romanticizing what happened. Even Phee's reaction was so understandable when you put yourself in the shoes of a teenager. I'll reiterate again and again, whatever you think about Be On Cloud as a management company, as a production company, they really are breaking boundaries and doing something right. Whatever happens in the second half, I think I'll be here, recovering, for a long time.

[swordcreature]

okay so that last last post you made said Dammon had a scent kink, but what about Rolan and Zevlor?

mmmmmmmm listen okay i enjoyed this too much honestly but i feel like i could literally write an entire fic centered around Dammon the panty stealer okay. idk why it just calls to me. so thank you hehe

Dammon, Rolan, & Zevlor - Scent Kink

very NSFW, adult themes, etc etc. MDNI/18+

Tiefling boys and getting off to Tav's scent

Dammon: 

I’ve made my feelings on this known before, but the man is dirty! I honestly feel like the smutty book he has in his room is one of the tamer ones he owns, somehow. And then he literally smells the malfunctioning components of Karlach’s heart, so we know he has a good nose. Put them together and the scent kink just makes sense! 

He's not just interested in the pretty scents either– how they smell like flowers right after a wash or how their hair always seems to bring with it the scent of a campfire. No, it’s all of them. 

The way they smell after sex: the salty, earthiness of their sweat as it mixes with the floral perfume of their soap.  

How they come into the forge with a tangy musk after having ran around all day in their warm armor.  

Even the bitter metallic odor that permeates their clothes after trying to wash all the blood out. 

It never fails to stir something in him deep down, like a primal instinct to lay them bare and take them like a wild animal.  

His favorite scent though? Their arousal.  

Maybe it’s because he’s a tiefling with a superior sense of smell, but the way they smell when they get heated, wetness pulling in their smallclothes. It raises the hairs on his neck with pure want.  

Dammon isn’t proud of it, but when Tav isn’t around he’ll steal a pair of their underthings that haven’t made it to the wash yet (only if they’re in a relationship of some sort, okay he’s not an animal) so that he can really enjoy himself. The smell alone makes him so hard he can feel the wet spot forming in his own pants.  

He’ll touch himself right then and there with nothing but Tav’s scent in his nose and his hand around his cock. And it’s the hardest orgasm he’s ever been able to give himself.  

But Tav always ends up wondering where their underwear went? They know they had more when they moved in with Dammon! 

Rolan: 

Rolan will never, ever admit he enjoys a good filthy sniff or two. Even to himself. Nope, he’s not some ‘degenerate’, thank you.  

And to be fair he isn’t as down bad as Dammon. I think out of the three, he’s the least likely to have a true scent kink.  

He can be a little pretentious at times, and definitely doesn’t like what he considers to be bad odors. Things like potent, musky sweat just aren’t his cup of tea to be honest.  

He’ll enjoy the smell of Tav’s clothes because it reminds him of home for some reason, and he always ends up feeling at ease when the minty smell of their breath washes over him. 

But he’s a total sucker for the smell of sex.  

The way the room smells head and organic after they’ve just fucked over his desk. 

Or the smell of their sheets as their cum and arousal and sweat all mix together.  

Makes him ready for another round almost immediately.  

When he’s alone and touching himself, he’ll sometimes stop to smell the sheets just to try and catch a whiff of the last time they had sex. I’m talking on all fours, nose pressed into the bed, hand around himself desperately. 

Nothing ever makes him throb as hard as when he goes down on Tav, their slick on his hands and chin and lips. When he’s absolutely positive that Tav is too far gone to notice, he’ll sit and take in the sweet musk of their wetness, it makes his mouth water like the bouquet of a fine wine. 

Tav jokes that Rolan gets a renewed vigor for oral after they cum the first time, but they never know why that is.  

Zevlor: 

Alright Zevlor fuckers this may be controversial. But. Zevlor is BIG into sweat. I just know it. He has to have some dirty secrets up his sleeves somewhere! 

Like, you know the way someone smells after a long day in the sun outside? Kind of like dirt and warmth and just a tinge of bitterness? 

That shit drives him mad. Feral. 

I don’t even think he realizes it for a while. He just thinks he’s particularly pent up on those days and that’s why he’s taking Tav into the bedroom at his first chance, or furiously tugging himself off after they get home.  

But one day they’re both in bed, sweating and breathless and sore. Zevlor leans in to kiss them and instinctively takes a whiff of them. And it’s almost a bad smell but not quite, it’s uniquely Tav. It makes him groan out loud.  

It’s very clear to him after that.  

He’s like Dammon: a clothes thief. But his go to is shirts, especially after an intense day of training or after an incredibly hot day.  

He will never, ever let Tav see this though. It’s too ungentlemanly and he would actually rather combust into flames than let them in on this little quirk of his.  

That still doesn’t stop him from using their shirt to get himself off on days when they’re out of the city or when he’s sure he won’t be interrupted.  

[idcbabyialreadylostmymind]

Rebellion pt.1

Pairing- Sully family x Sully!reader

Summary- Your going through a rebellion amd how easy can it be for your siblings to keep all the stuff they see you doing a secret.

Na'vi Translations- au- drum, Reypaytun- red, tsmisnr- lantern, 'ite- daughter

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3

A/N- did i make up two whole ass plants up for this fic yes yes I did and there will be a pt. 2 i just need to come up with ideas for it

Rules. Rules. Rules. That's all your father talked about. Who you can't hang out with. What you can't wear. Can't say. Can't do. Can't, Can't Can't. That's all he does, you're sick and tired of his rules.

First it started with the clothes. You had to wear shawls over your open armed tops, you threw all your shawls away. No short or high split loincloths. You started dressing how you wanted, regular revealing tops that everyone loved, and high slit loin skirts and loincloths.

.

.

.

.

"Y/N, Dad’s gonna skin you alive if he sees you in that." Kiri hissed as she saw you pull your low waisted loin skirt on. You turn to Kiri and put your hands on your hips. "You forget Kiri. I don't care what dad thinks because I am my own person." You say before pushing yourself out of your room and Kiri only shakes her head.

.

.

.

.

And then the parties. Every teen in the Omatikaya snuck out at night and snuck deeper in the woods to drink fermented nectar and smoke the Reypaytun flower, but not the Olo'eyktan's kids who had too many rules.

As you heard the light snoring of your mother and father, you got out of your cot and changed into your clothes. Opening a curtain window, you dip your feet over it and jump out following the other young Na'vi into the woods. You caught a few peoples eyes and a boy approaches you, Ao'zuk that's his name, an amazing healer. "I didn't know you came to these things." He said over the loud beat of the au. "I didn't." You say before taking his cup of nectar taking a big sip, it was bitter with a slight sweet aftertaste. "But I do now." You say and he smirks.

And that's how your nights went, did whatever duties your father humbly bestowed upon you during the day, and when Eclipse hit and all the adults were asleep you snuck out, drank, smoked, danced, and touched.

Little did you know your little brother, Neteyam, saw your nightly exhibitions and he wanted to know what you did. So he waited. Waited for you to change and sneak out, waited thirty minutes and followed the muffled sound of music.

And then he stepped into a swarm of dancing, making out, grinding, drinking, and smoking teens. And then he saw you sitting on someone's legs and they placed a small flower on your tongue. You swallowed as your already glazed eyes felt the flower kick in, pupils dilating in and out. Euphoria rushed through your veins as the man you sat on stuffed a bag into your bag and then you thanked him. You stayed there with a lazy smile as you blink up at the sky. Neteyam rushes home, what have you done to yourself?

He didn't know what to do. He crawled back into bed and closed his eyes. Only to shoot back open when he heard you creep back into the kelku. He heard you sit on the bed and open the bag and take another one. He cringes at the rustles of the bag, oh how he just wished this was a dream.

So he held hope that it was.

It wasn't.

He woke up and you held your bag to your chest protectively. He gulped thinking about what you had in there before shaking his head, getting ready for his duties for the day.

And as you stumbled up he never saw you without your bag by your side. Now it was time for the communal lunch, He sat by you and you looked over to him before taking a bite of the fruit in your hand. He wanted to know what is so cool about this stuff that you do all of it. “Y/N, can you take me to the party tonight, since mom and dad are on that hunting trip.." Neteyam whispered to you as Lo'ak sat between the two of you. "Oooo party, I'm so coming." He said and you were shocked. Swallowing the food in your mouth, "Um neither of you are going." You say and Lo'ak looked at you with disbelief. "If we can't come I'll tell mom and she'll tell dad—"

"Okay, okay! Just.. don't fall asleep. I don't feel like walking your heavy sleeping ass up." You reply to them before returning your attention to your food.

And so the two boys laid awake, until they heard the soft snoring of your sisters. They crouched out of bed after you changed. And just before they climbed out the window after you they heard an all too familiar voice. "Where are you guys going?" Kiri's voice rang through your ears and you regretted even letting them come along. And before you even knew it she was tagging along as well, holding her bag and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

You curse under your breath as you walk into the woods, younger siblings on your tail. Finally you made it, the sounds of loud pamtseo howling through the wind. Ao'zuk walked up to you and your siblings, reeking of fermented nectar as his arms wrapped around your waist. "Ao'zuk." You said warningly. "Come tìyawn I just got some fresh reypaytun from Za'kin." He said hands going a little lower than wanted.

Removing his hands, "Go wait for me." You say and he stumbles to the group who passed a pipe around.

"Reypaytun really?" Kiri asked and you rolled your eyes. "I thought dad told us to never to touch that stuff." Lo'ak asked. "I don't see dad here and besides, I'm gonna go have some fun," you say, starting to walk off before turning back to your siblings, "Don't take anything anyone gives you and only drink water." You instruct your younger siblings who looked bewildered that you were leaving them.

You sit next to Ao'zuk and he hands you the pipe but not before taking a huge hit. You settle closer to his side and take a hit before passing it again waiting for the effects to take place.

And they did, your blood ran fast, puplis bigger than ever as you danced, hips and arms swaying in the wind as you danced to the beat with the others. You feet and head hurt, you grabbed onto Ao'zuk and he gives you a lazy smile as he held your hips making you dance. Your head spun and your eyes were half-lidded and red as you shook your head no. "You’re having fun." Ao'zuk laughed and you felt like you wanted to cry but all you did was smile and say yes.

Neteyam saw you from the side and he felt his stomach churn the more he saw the distress in your eyes.

Finally you stumbled off the dance floor and caught your breath. The woods, the fire, the music it was getting to you, you held your head in your hands as the trees started to move and blend together. And then you felt a hand on your arm making you blink. It was Ao'zuk he held something in his hand before sliding it to you. "It'll take the edge off." He yelled as you put it in your mouth drinking the rest of the nectar in your cup.

Stumbling to your siblings, your eyes glazed over and bloodshot red, you point to the hometree and they went. "Did you have fun?" Lo'ak asked and you looked at him and gave him a lazy smile with tears in your eyes as you spoke. "Yeah."

None of your siblings spoke of what happened that night. But Neteyam couldn't get the despair that took over your face that night. He couldn't let you ruin yourself. No matter how much you were going to hate him for what he was about to do.

Neteyam waited for you to sneak out and he knew tonight would be the night your parents got back. He waited for them with a tsmisnr to keep a dim light. As he heard the rustles of the makeshift curtain that acted like a front door, he watched his parents walk in quietly. Jake jumps a bit seeing his oldest son sitting in a dimly lit room.

"Son." Jake whispered and Neteyam’s palms got sweaty, his stomach bubbling in anxiety.

"Um, I have something to tell you guys." Neteyam said and his mother looked confused as she sat down along with her husband.

"What is it?" Neytiri asked and Neteyam looked up. "Y/N, she's been sneaking out and drinking and using Reypaytun and she takes these small flowers and I can't just watch her do this to herself and.. and so I'm telling you guys." Neteyam stammers out and he watches as Neytiri's face falls as well as his father’s, from the new load of information they learned of their eldest daughter.

"Where is she now?" Jake asks gruffly and Neteyam sighed. "At a party." Neteyam answered and Jake sighed deeply. "I will go see if my mother will watch the children and Neteyam so we can talk to her whenever she gets back." Neytiri said and Neteyam shook his head. "No, I told you guys I should be here when she comes home." Neteyam replies before Jake nodded as Neytiri picked up Tuk and woke the others up.

They waited and waited. It was quite a long time till you got back, Jake began to get irritated and Neytiri worried. And then they heard shuffling in the other room.

You walk in and don't see your siblings, worried, you walk into the other room, and your eyes widen as you see your brother sitting with your parents and avoiding eye contact with you.

"Y/N, come sit down." Jake said roughly and you clutched your bag as you sat down. "Yes..?" You say as you sit at the table that you father made. "Where were you?" Jake hoped you'd tell the truth.

You straighten your back and look down at your trembling legs. "With my friends." You reply simply and Jake clicks his tongue. "We know the truth Y/N, your brother told us." You look at him and then at Neteyam. "Told you what?" You ask, face and palms getting hot. "We know you've been sneaking out, smoking, drinking and about those flowers you take." You had a deadpan expression on your face and then you realized Neteyam had told on you.

"I don't know what your talking about." You try and lie your way out. "Neteyam told us." Neytiri said and you send a deadly glare towards your younger brother. "And you believe him! Huh?!" You exclaim and Jake holds his hands up. "Well Y/N, why would he lie about this?”

You push yourself out of your chair and rub your face before huffing. "I don't know why he would do that. But I- I have no clue what you're talking about." You refused to give it up and Neteyam just wanted it to stop.

"Open your bag Y/N." Neteyam said and you eyed him from where you were. "No." You say and Jake looks at his son and then at you. "Come 'ite give me the bag." Neytiri reaches for the bag that was placed on your shoulder and you snatch it away from the woman, panic running through your body.

"I don't know why you’re all ganging up on me." You defend yourself.

"No one is ganging up on you sweetie. Just give me the bag." Jake said and you shook your head but before you knew it he had already grabbed your bag. You tried to snatch it back but it was too late as he and your mother now stood in front of you looking between you and the bag. Your chest heaved with every breath you took. You were so nervous, more nervous than you've ever been.

Jake opened the bag and he closed his eyes as he saw a bag full of small flowers, pollen, a substance that gets you so high you forget your own name.

''Really,'' He said taking the smaller bag in his hand and throwing it on the table. You close your eyes and whisper a quiet 'fuck'. Before covering your face and huffing into your hands and taking them off and quietly laughing. ''Fuck me.'' You say as a pitful excuse of a chuckle erupts from your throat.

''I thought we taught you better than this.'' Jake said and you looked at him and laughed. ''Yeah well looks like you didn't'.” You say and then your bloodshot eyes look at Neteyam who had a confused look on his face.

''Neteyam can you leave?'' You point to the door before an irritated breath leaves your lungs and his nonexistent eyebrows furrow. “Why? Y/N, I'm just trying to help you.'' He asked and you clench your jaw. ''Because honestly looking at you makes me physically. fucking. ill.'' You yell at him making him flinch, his ears laid still on the sides of his head.

''Y/N!'' Jake yelled at you and you look over rolling your eyes. ''Neteyam, son, go with your other siblings.'' Neytiri told her eldest son who nodded and left.

Your other siblings seemed to be eavesdropping and he shooed them off they all held a shocked face. You had never yelled at them before but here you are.

Turning back to your father, you sneer, why'd Neteyam have to tell? That's what you were thinking over and over again. "Y/N I've tolerated the clothes, but now sneaking out and- and now this." He said picking up the bag on the table. Rolling your eyes once more. "Just tell us what's gotten into you, babygirl-" he goes to touch your cheek but you step away from him.

"Nothing has gotten into me, I'm sorry I'm not daddy's little girl anymore, and don't listen to every stupid rule you make. You don't know shit about me,, neither of you do so stop pretending that you do." You say before walking out of the home leaving your parents confused, what happened to their little girl?

[bothoutsiders]

if you’re still taking requests, maybe identity porn? or just mutual pining fluff!

hey anon! this is my first time trying identity porn, that's why it took me so long. also jason's undercover name is john as in john doe. it was fun trying this new trope, thank you for the experience!

--

From all the odd jobs and undercover cases that Jason had gone through - nothing compared to this one.

It was probably one of the easiest and clean jobs he had ever had though. While the pay wasn’t that good, he could enjoy some peace, the AC and at the same time, study his target. His tasks were simple; he was in charge of the music, cleaning his work area and making fun, colorful beverages that were so popular nowadays. 

He wouldn’t admit it, but he honestly kind of enjoyed making lattes, smoothies and sweet-fruit drinks. Not as much as getting rid of the garbage of Gotham, of course, but for a day-job, he thought it was a pretty nice change of pace.

The clients were all types of different people. Guys in a suit coming for their boring americano, teens coming for lattes and smoothies, young adults for tea, milkshakes and more. It was interesting.

Jason even had fun the day he convinced an old stoic man to try something sweet. Men have to like bitter things, the client had said. Jason snorted, did some convincing and made up ‘scientific’ and social explanations about it before handing him a strawberry latte.

He couldn’t help but grin the moment he saw the client’s face change from deadpan to surprise and then some embarrassment for actually liking it.

It was good that he didn’t get bored when his target wasn’t around. The people were friendly and he was enjoying his time, but still, this job in particular was hard for one specific reason.

“It’s getting late.” He neatly folded a cloth and wiped the surface of the counter.

There was no response. Of course.

“If you don’t pack your things I’ll kick you out without them.”

There was still no response. Besides the music in the background, he could hear some fast typing. This was how his evenings went most of the time.

In past jobs he had dealt with drunkards, with abusive bosses, awful customers, annoying and nosy coworkers, but this? This was something he never expected to happen to him.

“Okay, that’s enough Timothy.” He could feel his heart pounding against his chest as he made his way to Tim’s table. He knew he was good at pretending nothing extraordinary was happening, but deep inside he was panicking only because he was talking to him.

Even if Tim was ignoring him right now.

“I’m gonna close soon so I need you to leave. Go home and have some real sleep.” He said resting his elbow on the table. He wasn’t into touching without consent so even if he wanted to be annoying to Tim, he didn’t dare to do such a thing. “Are you listening, monkey?”

Tim looked up at him a bit surprised but as soon as the words sunk in, he looked at his watch. “It’s already closing time?” He began to whine but almost immediately he changed his mood. “Before you kick me out– look!” With a big smile on his face, he was quick to take his phone, unlock it and shove it into Jason’s face.

“How many times have I told you to stop doing that?” He pushed the phone away and tried to focus his eyes on the screen. He already knew what he was about to see. “What’s that ugly thing?”

“John. You really have bad taste,” he frowned slightly before he’d swipe right and smile again. “There are more photos! I took them last night.” It was clear that Tim was proud of it.

“Are you … friends with that guy?” Jason didn’t look him in the eye, pretending that the idea of Tim and Red Hood being friends made him nervous. This kid had so many photos of him on his laptop and phone, it was crazy. And honestly? Jason was flattered. “He’s a menace.”

“He’s not!” Tim was quick to defend him. “I know that he carries guns and he kills people but he kills the bad ones! That terrible people won’t be coming back to keep hurting others. Most of you are fans of Batman even if the cops hate him, right? Well, Red Hood is my Batman.”

There was a small smirk on Jason’s face. He bothered Tim about this only because he liked to hear all the nice things he had to say about Red Hood. It wasn’t often that he would find someone who thought in such a positive way about him. “You’re a crazy little guy.”

“Nah, I’m just telling the truth. He’s funny too.” Since the very first time that they met, Tim didn’t hide his ‘admiration’ for Red Hood. He’d spend his evenings at the café talking about how great he was, how Red Hood had saved him once and how they would talk some nights and even let Tim take his photos. 

“So you hang out at 3am with a criminal only because he’s fun?” He huffed. “Tim, you gotta meet new people. People your age and you’ll see there’s more funny, safe people out there that you can meet during the day. I’m sure this is why you spend your evenings here, consuming all that caffeine.”

For Jason it was love at first sight, but Tim? Tim was too blind with how great Red Hood was that there were days Jason would even get jealous of himself. He blamed it on his night job and how tired he could be after patrolling the city and then coming to the café without much rest.

“There’s no one at home, I would rather spend it here where I can eat and drink and then get ready for the night.” He replied as he took his time to put everything in his backpack.

“You’re not a vigilante like him, Tim. Be careful, okay?”

“Yeah, I always make sure not to get in his way.”

“So how is your little fan club going?” The day was slow and there weren't many people at the café, except for Tim who was close to the counter, and a girl in a corner, buried in books and looking like she might explode if someone dated to interrupt her.

Jason decided to change the music to something relaxing for studying.

“It’s okay. I don’t share all my photos though.” Tim wasn’t looking at him, he was still busy with his laptop. By now Jason knew that if it wasn’t him doing homework or talking to his friends, he was busy with his Red Hood fan club.

“You don’t?” He was confused. He thought that was the purpose of those photos, to share them and make it obvious who was Red Hood’s favorite.

“Mm no.” Tim looked at him and after a big pause, he decided to confess. “I don’t like sharing. I even have a couple of selfies with him, but I don’t post those. They are only for myself.”

“But you showed them to me.”

“Yes, but I didn’t send them to you, it’s different.” There was a light shrug before he’d focus back on his laptop.

“Do you print them as posters for your bedroom?”

Tim didn’t reply, only looked up at Jason.

“You do, don’t you?” He grinned. “I can’t believe you’re obsessed with that stinky guy. You’re into bad boys, huh?”

There was a cute blush that spread through Tim’s face instantly. “He’s not a bad guy.”

“Yeah, I mean I guess being a criminal and killing people is something good people do.” Jason shrugged, a smirk still on his face. “What is so cool about him? Does he even do the laundry?”

“Everything is cool about him,” Tim frowned slightly but after a moment of wondering what to do, he sighed and closed his laptop, focusing entirely on Jason. 

Oh, he was getting serious.

“Look, he’s amazing. He’s someone you can talk to and has good advice, he is kind and worries about everyone. Yes, killing is bad but he’s a good person. He does this to stop innocent people from getting hurt or murdered.” He spoke as if he was pleading for Red Hood’s life. “He has a nice voice even if it’s kind of muffled under his helmet, and he makes sure I get home safe. He has this kind of humor that I actually find funny and he has big hands and his thighs are…”

“Oh wait, wait. Hold on.” Jason lifted his hands. “I don’t want to hear about your fantasies. I get it, you like him that way but are you sure he isn’t like someone who is trying to fool you? Pretend he is cool and then he shows his true colors?”

“I’m sure he isn’t pretending. He’s not a nice guy. He’s kind and a real man.” Tim said this looking him in the eye.

Maybe Jason felt something like butterflies in his stomach and something warm blossoming in his chest. 

Maybe. But who knows.

“What about guys who help elderly people with chores or do their groceries shopping? What about those who help kids find their parents when they are lost and cook meals at shelters?” It wasn’t that Jason wanted Tim to stop liking Red Hood, he only wanted to have a chance too. Maybe mentioning some of the things he had done and still does would help his case.

“Good for them?” Tim arched an eyebrow.

Jason was about to complain but the bell over the door chimed, announcing a new customer arriving. When he turned to look, he saw it was his target coming in and oh, right, I’m working-working. 

He looked at Tim one more time and sighed dramatically. “Okaay, okaay. I’m glad you found the one. Just make sure to get home safe after you see him.” It was a bit silly that he would like to bother him about it and then get jealous when he would hear all that admiration Tim felt for Red Hood, but it was somehow addicting.

“Sure.” He hummed happily, a light blush still on his face as he opened his laptop to start typing again.

Jason smiled, hoping that one day Tim would like him too, and not only one version of himself. Maybe one day.

[strangunddurm]

Disillusioned

Warnings: food, eating, alcohol consumption, you have breasts, age gap (unspecified how big though but reader is an adult ofc and has a job), cheating, small angst, unhappy relationship, reader is racially ambiguous.

I've been trying really, really hard to get out of my writer's rut but it's been a challenge. This little re-write has helped me a lot creatively :)

Word count: 6.8k

Summary: Aaron Hotchner cannot stop thinking about you, no matter how wrong it may be.

“I know I am but summer to your heart, and not the full four seasons of the year.” ― Edna St. Vincent Millay

You were the beginning of his end. Oh, so lovely and so sweet that keeping away from you was next to impossible. Infidelity came as a biproduct. He didn’t mean to cheat; does anybody set out with the intention of cheating? Falling for you and all that you were was as easy as breathing, entirely natural. It was inevitable. 

The entire situation wasn’t improved by the fact that you were his wife's niece. Haley didn’t deserve this. It was unfair, Aaron knew that it was, but he couldn’t stop himself. You put him in a trance he did not even attempt to break. It had to be acknowledged that the marriage he had with Haley hadn’t been a marriage in quite some time. They had stayed together because they had always been together, not because they still loved or lusted after one another. They had drifted apart long before you. You were not to blame; you were not the reason for their end. Divorce had been looming at the horizon, but they hadn’t quite reached that stage yet when you came into his life.

He tried not to think about that part… Wife. Niece. But it was hard to ignore… You were after all only ever around if was to visit her, “your favourite aunt in the whole, wide world”. Did it make it better that you weren’t related by blood? …That the title of niece and aunt had been voluntarily applied to each upon birth due to the closeness between Haley and your mother. He hoped it did. He told himself over and over again that it did.

The first time he had met you was imprinted on his mind. He would never forget that day — could never — it was one of the best days of his life. You had stepped out onto the train’s platform like a saving grace, absolutely glowing with delight as you tossed your arms around Haley’s neck. You didn’t like flying, preferring the sights offered by a ticking train as it bustled its way along the train tracks. Aaron had never been able to come with whenever Haley went up north to visit you. He had always been too busy with a case or something else that was urgent and “couldn’t wait”. He would forever immensely regret never coming along earlier.

You were never mad, never angry, or upset. You were so easy to have a conversation with; everything interested you and you were curious about all the world had to offer. Nothing was ever boring with you. You were so different from her. You possessed that uncanny ability to find bliss in even the most bitter moments. Of course, it was easy to think that when he only ever met you briefly as Haley helped you get settled into the city. Washington D.C. was your new home and Aaron was certain that he was being blessed by somebody that must've been watching over. How else could it be that you were presented to him like this? A golden opportunity and it was hard to keep his hands to himself. Quick hugs grew to be more and more lingering, hands travelling lower, becoming more inappropriate as you spent more time at their house; babysitting his son, helping his wife.

He didn’t think you would reciprocate any sort of feelings. But then he started to notice the way you would look up at him and press up just a little closer to him whenever you could. At first, he tried to be rational, reasoning that it was just him that was hyper-aware of everything that you did, and therefore overanalysing every single situation. 

But then you brushed up against his front in that absolutely sinful little dress you had been wearing in the Virginia summer heat, and he was sure that you were just as interested in him as he were you, if not even more.

It had been at that quaint little bar on the corner that he tended to frequent together with a few of Haley’s friends whenever there was a small reason for a celebration. Everyone had been so drunk on the energy that was vibrating through the room that it was impossible for them to notice anything that wasn’t themselves.

He had been so nervous when Haley had said that she had invited you. He didn’t want to spend time with you because the feelings that bubbled within him felt like he was betraying his marriage. But then again, he hadn’t asked Haley to invite you, so it wasn’t devious on his part in any way. He knew that it would be different seeing you there compared to in his own home. It would remove that last remaining obstacle that had kept him in control for the past few months,

Aaron was several glasses in, standing at the bar, getting ready to order the next round. You had come with him, eagerly scooting out of the booth after him as you offered to help him carry everyone’s orders back. You were so kind and he couldn’t refuse your help; he didn't want to give you any reason to think that he was pushing you away, but he was so scared of you to come closer.

It was crowded, yes, but it hadn’t been necessary for you to stand so close to him. And it definitely wasn’t necessary for you to press into him the way that you did as you stood in front of him, leaning over the bar as you talked to the bartender. He thought it was an accident at first, causing him to shuffle awkwardly a few paces to the left. But then you sneakily came shuffling after him pressing into him again and he knew it was intentional that time.

Could you feel what you were doing to him? You had to feel the bulge that was beginning to grow in his pants. Your dress was made of such thin material that it was almost see through, and his dress pants – the same ones he had worn to work and hadn’t had time to change out of- did nothing to hide the feeling of his semi hard cock.

Aaron stayed frozen in the same place, not daring to move a muscle for fear that he would scare you away. His mind didn’t even think about the possibility of anyone seeing the two of you, all he could focus on was the feeling of you and the feelings you caused to rush through him. The small taste he had gotten of the feel of you had already made him addicted.

His breath shuddered slightly before he pressed forward ever so lightly, testing your limits. It was such a small movement that it could easily be explained away as him bumping into you if it was needed; it was a bar that they were in, after all, it was custom that people bumped into one another. 

The feeling that fluttered through him when you didn’t shy away was indescribable. Especially when you, after a few moments, pressed back firmly into him, rubbing against him. There was no denying it then, the intentions behind your actions.

Aaron's breath stuttered as he shakily exhaled. His cock was almost fully hard at this point, over-sensitive to even the lightest whisper of a touch. He yearned for you.

His own needs took over, rutting into you as discreetly as he could, craving the friction. The music was loud but the rumble of voices that penetrated the air was even louder. It drowned out the low grunts of pleasure that Aaron couldn’t help but release under his breath. 

Only one of his hands was placed on the bar in front of the two of you, needing some sort of support for fear that his knees would buckle at any moment. The other was just hanging by his side, unsure what to do next. He wanted to touch you; wanted to feel your skin under his finger tips; wanted to drag up the hem of that dress so that he could just slip into your slickness and take you right then and there. But he didn’t — he couldn’t. Not yet. Not there.

Thankfully, the bartender had served the drinks before he could do anything else. The clink of the glasses as they were placed down in front of you pulled Aaron out of his less than clean thoughts so quickly that he took a step back without thinking about it, bumping into a passing patron. He apologised with raised hands before fumbling as he tried to grab as many glasses as he could. He, Aaron Hotchner, was flustered beyond belief. It was so unlike him but not in a bad way. He enjoyed it.

He didn’t dare meet your eyes, but it was impossible to miss the way you smiled up at him in that mirthful way.

Aaron hadn’t seen you for a while after that. It was probably for the best, perhaps it was the universe trying to give him a chance to stop whatever inner turmoil was brewing within him. But absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Because right now, he was sure that he had never felt for another person what he felt for you. What he once had thought to be lust had merely been the illusion of it. A delusion made to make him believe that what he had been feeling for Haley was driven by anything other than the need to look complete in the eyes of others. The perfect man had a perfect wife by his side which developed into the perfect American family once Jack came along; but what are the perks of being perfect? Aaron had this irresistible urge to do something irrational, to act up and make irreversible mistakes that he would lay awake thinking about at night for weeks on end.

And here you were, strutting down the halls of the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s headquarters, practically begging him to fall in love with you from the way your hips swung. It was enticing, and unfortunately, he wasn't the only one that was entranced by them. You were turning heads left and right as you passed by his colleagues, and it infuriated him like nothing before.

Aaron shifted uncomfortably in his chair as he watched you get closer and closer to his office with the brightest of smiles on your face. You were so focused on him and only him that you didn't even turn your head as one of the younger, nameless, agents whistled teasingly at you. But Aaron heard, and Aaron saw exactly who had been watching you with as much interest as he, himself, had. And in that moment, Aaron decided that he hated all of them.

"Hi!" Were you ever in a bad mood? Aaron had to reflect over it for a moment, you were like a constant ray of sunshine whenever you were around him, but he knew that that wasn't always the case; Haley had informed him of as much. It appeared as if you too were unable to keep a smile from your face whenever the two of you were together.

"What are you doing here?" Aaron straightened his back slightly, subconsciously puffing out his chest just a tiny bit, and clearing his throat. He waved for you to entre and close the door behind you. It wasn't that he wasn't happy to see you, not at all, it was just that he couldn't help himself from growing hard in his slacks whenever he saw you.

"I brought you lunch, a little birdie told me that you usually skip it." You didn't notice his obvious apprehension as he glanced nervously out the window to his office to see if anyone was watching the two of you, or perhaps you just decided to ignore it.

"You didn't have to do that." Aaron tried not appear over-eager as he attempted to sneak a peak inside the bag you had been lugging over your shoulder, filled with whatever you had cooked up. Haley would always brag about your cooking skills to her girlfriends whenever they were over at the house for dinner. Aaron hadn't had the privilege of tasting your food yet, always being pulled away by a new case whenever plans had been made.

"Oh, don't be silly, I wanted to." You lightly tap his shoulder teasingly, sending him another of those smiles that practically made his heart stop for just a few moments. You had moved around his desk as you presented your offering to him, taking every opportunity to be closer to him. Aaron couldn't stop the shy grin that he sent you in return, even if he had wanted to. "Do you want to eat here?" You continued, glancing around the room for the first time, taking in all the paperwork and all the people that were trying, and failing, to inconspicuously watch the conversation you were having through the glass. 

"Let me just clear some of this stuff up." Aaron stood shakily as he shuffled through the piles of papers, making room for the both of you on his cluttered desk. It wasn't exactly the ideal place to be, he wanted you completely alone, away from all these people, but Aaron knew that he wouldn't be able to control himself, and he couldn't risk that, not yet at least.

It was when Aaron had finally insisted on walking you out after lunch that someone couldn’t stifle their curiosity anymore. Of course, it was Morgan that came waltzing up to the two of them, whistling mischievously as he surveyed you with a glint in his eyes.

"Were you trying to sneak her out of here without introducing us to your friend, Hotch?" A grin wider than the Cheshire Cat's made its way across his face, a smile that had broken many hearts previously. Morgan didn't try to hide the way he dragged his eyes up and down your figure. Could he be blamed? You had this air around you that would draw people in, no matter who they were. It drew one in with a promise of the possibility of exhilarating moments, intimately shared between you, them, and the world. It gave Aaron the impression that if you asked, he would do anything for you.

Aaron got so distracted by it that he didn't pay attention to you making nice and introducing yourself to Morgan and the others. He was so preoccupied with worrying about the possibility of other men's attraction to you that he could barely focus as he glowered around the room, meeting the hungry gazes of some of his fellow agents. What if you found somebody else? Somebody better? Somebody who could give you everything that you deserved. Aaron didn't think about the fact that he had his own wife and child at home; a wife who deserved much more than a man who was lusting after her niece.

"Have you been keeping her from us, Boss Man?"

"Huh?" Aaron blinked a couple of times, trying to make his mind focus on what Morgan was saying but it was close to impossible.

"Oh, he can't be blamed," You had obviously taken notice of his distracted state and placed a hand on his shoulder in comfort, squeezing tightly as you let out an infectious laugh. It offered him more comfort than anything ever before.

You had moved closer to Aaron, pushing your arms together more and more. Aaron didn't know whether it was subconsciously done or not, but he welcomed it, nonetheless. Standing next to you was like standing next to the sun, heat radiating off of you in waves of comfort.

The action would be something that would worry him later. With a room full of profilers, somebody was sure to notice the way you made his heart race and palms sweat.

"She's too nice to be around you guys." Aaron muttered gruffly. Morgan laughed as if it was a joke with JJ chiming in, but Aaron was more than half serious as he said it. He didn't like sharing; never did, never would do.

It was even more impossible for Aaron to stop thinking about you after that. That small act of kindness, of bringing him lunch, replaying over and over in his head. He wasn't used to people taking care of him. He had been as independent as one could be since he turned 18, despite having been married for an odd number of years. Haley had never even mentioned the possibility of her bringing him lunch.

Aaron and Haley’s marriage had been on the rocks for a while now; in fact, Aaron could argue that it had been that way since the start. Affection wasn't exactly an active part of their relationship, and they were both more interested in other people than each other. But still, Aaron had never cheated on Haley. He hadn't ever felt the need to, he had always been perfectly contempt in the arrangement that they'd had. He didn't know if Haley had showed him the same respect, it wouldn't surprise him if she hadn't. She was far more unhappy with him and the life that they shared.

He knew that he should've divorced her a long time ago. It had been the right thing to do. He had been meaning to for a while, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. But you... you were brining feelings to the surface which he had ignored for so long, and he didn't know if he could go on doing that for much longer.

You brought along a shift in his marriage to Haley. A shift which he had been too blind to see in the beginning, but which was beginning to become clearer and clearer to him now. The rows which he and Haley would have started becoming more and more heated, more and more frequent. Constant arguing over the smallest of things were a regularity in their daily life and there was barely a cool-down period between each one by now. Before, it had been Haley berating him for all the wrongs he did her as he was loyal to his job. Now, he pushed back as he saw the promise of something happier glittering in the distance.

Maybe that's why he did what he did; why he invited you in when you came knocking on the door the night Haley was out with her sister and Jack had been put to bed. Of course, you weren't there for him, it was her you were seeking on your way home from a late shift at work. But he couldn't resist having a moment alone with you; a moment completely by yourselves without spectators and auditors.

"Haley is out with friends." Aaron wouldn’t be the Unit Chief of the BAU if he had missed the pleased look that flashed across your face as you took in the news whilst you stepped into the house.

"Oh, that's too bad." Was it really? He'd like to think of it as a blessing.

"Can I get you anything?" Aaron scratched the back of his head awkwardly as he fumbled over his words from nerves. It was becoming an automatic reaction, palms becoming clammy and heart roaring in his ears whenever he would see you. You made him feel far younger than his years. 

"I brought a bottle of wine we could share?"

"Wine?"

"I bought it on the way home... work has really been riding me this week so I need it." Riding you. Did you do it on purpose? Say these things to rile him up and make him want to take you that much more? You had to be. You were an absolute minx, fuelling the fruitless fantasies of a dirty old man. But you were a bad girl, weren't you? A bad girl that needed to be punished and he wouldn't mind volunteering himself for the job. Yes, Aaron could imagine it happening in quite a few ways.

You pulled out the bottle of red from the convenience store bag that had 'thank you, thank you, thank you' displayed in red across the front and was tightly grasped in your hand. You wiggled the bottle slightly, trying to tempt him even more, but Aaron didn't need much convincing. In fact, he needed none at all. You had to know that.

The two of you settled into peaceful conversation after Aaron had gotten the bottle opener from the kitchen along with two wine glasses. How is it that you can fall into such easy-going conversations with a person you barely know? It had been that way from the start. Aaron had never felt the pressure and stress that could often accompany conversations with others. He was a confident person, yes, but he, like all others, had often had  to wrack his brain for a topic that was only minutely interesting in an attempt to avoid awkward silence. With you everything was so different, fresh, and new. It made Aaron realise that he had perhaps always settled before; or perhaps saying always was unfair, but a majority of the time, at least. Settled when it came to friends, settled when it came to his job, settled when it came to his wife.

Was it love that he felt for you? Perhaps. After all, you had made Aaron question everything and that included what he had interpreted as love before. How could he possibly ever know what love was again? Did he love you? No, he knew that much, or at least he wasn't in love with you and that was an important distinction. But he loved you for the way that you made him feel, for the way you made him realise that happiness was within his reach. It would be easy for it to develop into even more if only he let go of all his inhibitions. 

Was it him that had moved closer to you? Aaron didn't know, but all of a sudden he realised that your thigh was pressed up against his own and it took everything within him not to reach out and touch you again. He wanted to feel what your supple skin felt like underneath his fingers and what a moan that slipped past your lips would sound like. Aaron needed to know how you would feel with your walls wrapped around his cock as he pumped into you. He needed it like he needed air to breathe; so, was it really his fault when he finally let his arm fall over your shoulders mid-laugh?

You didn't shy away from his touch. Far from it, you welcomed it whole-heartedly, pressing into his side and slinging your outer leg over his lap. There was a brief pause of silence as he surveyed you, breath shakily exhaling as he though his options through. He could either push you away and make up some sort of excuse as to why you would have to leave, or he could pull you even closer and deal with the consequences afterwards.

Planting his hand on your thigh and encouraging you to straddle his lap was the obvious choice for Aaron. It might not have been the right choice, the chivalrous choice, but he would never find himself regretting the decision. Not ever.

You let out a giggle as you got settled, hips pressed flush against one another, hands coming to rest on the backrest of the couch on either side of his head, caging him in as his own rested securely on your hips. He felt like the vulnerable prey under you gaze; you were the predator, watching him in trepidation, ready to pounce and claim what you deemed yours at a moment's notice.

Aaron had to crane his head back to be able to meet your gaze. There was a dangerous and hungry glint in it, hiding behind feigned innocence that could fool anybody, even him. You weren't a complete innocent party; you knew what you wanted, and what you wanted you would get as the final victor in it all.

"You're so pretty." It was a reflection that Aaron had meant to keep to himself, but he feared that he would regret not saying the words now just in case he never got the privilege to say them again.

"You think so?" The grin that weaved its way across your face was far less than bashful, it was full of pride as you knew just what you did to him.

Aaron hummed lowly in reply, continuing to admire you. He wasn't shy as he let his eyes wander to your cleavage that was practically calling his attention as it paraded in front of him.

His hand came up to finger at the neckline, pulling at it to reveal even more of your skin to him. A groan caught in the back of Aaron's throat as he saw the lace of the bra you were wearing; the flesh of your breasts almost spilling out of it as it fought its confinement.

There wasn't even a hint of hesitancy as you brought the garment over your head, flinging it away to an unimportant corner of the room before retaking your position on top of him.

You were glorious; the most beautiful creature he had ever had the pleasure of seeing.

"And what do you think of this?" You asked cheekily, tongue running along the inside of your lips as you tried to not grin too widely.

"Beautiful."

Aaron couldn't hold himself back any longer. He had to know what every inch of you tasted like, even if it was the last thing he ever did.

His left hand, the hand that had been toying with your shirt, travelled even further north to wrap around your neck, finding a home there and pulling you forward gently so that he could finally press his lips roughly against your own.

You tasted just like he had dreamed, soft and sweet and subtle under the traces of wine. There was no stopping him after that; he craved more and more with every low moan of pleasure that escaped you.

Your hips had begun to grind down against his in small waves, seeking any sort of friction to alleviate the throbbing that had been steadily growing between your legs throughout the night.

Aaron rutted his own hips upwards and the sharp jolt caused you to disconnect your lips from his for a brief moment to let out a wanton moan.

"You like that?"

"I love it."

Aaron wanted to make you moan. He wanted to hear you scream and weep and laugh as he made you cum over and over again. He wanted to bury his face between your legs and feast until he was no longer hungry. He wanted to thrust into you without abandonment until he had coaxed a thousand orgasms out of you. He wanted to fill you up and watch as his creamy, white spent leaked out of you and then he wanted to do it all over again and again and again. Aaron was prepared to offer everything he had and more just so that he could see your face furrow as an orgasm caused your body to convulse and chest to heave.

"We shouldn't." Aaron tried to be the mature one in the situation but it was if neither you nor himself had heard him as you both continued grinding down and up against each other, chasing whatever relief that was offered.

You know those moments when you know that you should be doing anything other than what you were doing at that instant but then you cannot possibly even consider doing anything else but? This was one of those moments.

Aaron's lips devoured your own in a frenzy. It was like he could never get enough of you, biting and pulling at your lips, trying to sate the need he had for you in any way that he could. His tongue explored your mouth with a delighted moan, and you grew wetter with every nibble.

Aaron's hands clumsily made quick work on your bra, pulling it from your body eagerly. The swell of your breasts was glorious and he didn't hesitate to disconnect his lips from yours so that he could wrap them around your nipple, giving it the same treatment as he caressed and tugged and nibbled at it.

His actions caused shockwaves of pleasure to run through your body, straight to your core as you pulled on his dark hair as you tried to not lose yourself to the overwhelming pleasure of it all too soon.

Each of you moved as rapidly as the other, pulling at your clothes to undress as rapidly as you could. As you were finally rid of your clothes, Aaron wondered for an instance if he could keep you like this, gloriously nude and practically drunk from the thought of him.

"I’m gonna fuck you right here on the couch, do you want that, sweet girl?" Aaron cooed at you in only his boxers, shirt having been discarded and pants being pushed down to his ankles. His hand caressed your cheek briefly before trailing all the way down to your clit, giving it a quick rub and flick, eliciting another soft whine from you.

"Right in plain view of the door so that if Haley comes home early, she will see exactly what a bad fucking girl you are as you take my cock." You couldn’t help the moan that slipped out, and a grin grew on Aaron’s face as he heard it.

‘You’d like that, wouldn’t you? You fucking slut.’ Aaron wanted Haley to come home now. He wanted her to watch as he pushed his cock into you whilst he fucked you with a passion that was completely unknown to her. He wanted you to ride him, walls engulfing his thick shaft, his fingers circling your clit as she sat in the chair across from the two of you, mesmerised by the sight of true ecstasy.

“Get up.” Aaron demanded impatiently, tapping your side lightly with a finger. He lifted his hips just high enough so that he could slide his boxers down to join his pants, cock slapping against his stomach as it was exposed to the cold air.

You fell to your knees at the sight of him, hands resting on his thick thighs as you lurched forward, needing to taste him but Aaron stopped you with a hand before you could. He loved seeing you like this, on your knees for him. He fisted his length, spreading the small bead of pre-cum over his tip with a thumb as he came to the top. He was painfully hard, head angrily red, weeping for your mouth.

"There's no need to rush, sweet girl." Aaron chuckled as you pouted. He felt exactly like you did, but he didn't want it all to be over far too quickly. However, he could just take you again after this so what was the point of going slowly?

"Open your mouth."

Of course, you were compliant, eagerly opening your mouth to take him in. He took the thumb that was smeared with pre-cum and brought it to your lips, letting you wrap your lips around it and sucking it into your mouth. He groaned at the sight of you, eyes wide and glossy. Your mouth was hot around him, tongue lapping him clean, and it was impossible to hold out longer after that.

He was quick to grip his hand on the back of your head, guiding you as you took him in your mouth. The pace he set was merciless. He made it clear that he was the one in control as he forced your head down the length of his shaft, making you gag around him as he hit the back of your throat. You were incredible, taking it all in stride as his hips rutted upwards needing to feel you taking him even further. His head fell back against the couch for a brief moment, eyes almost going cross as you hollowed out your cheeks.

"Fuck!" He groaned out. You were watching him from under hooded eyelids, eyes practically glowing with lust and his gaze was intense as he stared back. “I knew you’d love sucking my cock, you dirty girl” He smirked as he praised you.

You moaned around him, a small dollop of drool trailing down your chin. One of your hands moved from his thigh to gently play with his balls and he moaned before giving a final thrust into your mouth and then pushing you back by your shoulder to withdraw himself from you.

There were tears of pleasure trickling down your cheeks and Aaron couldn’t help but smile in satisfaction as you wiped your mouth clean with the back of your hand.

"Come here." Aaron was pumping his fist around his shaft as he watched you stand, legs coming onto either side of him before sitting down. Your breasts were pressed up against his, his cock wedged in between your bodies and pulsing angrily as he felt you rub against him, leaving a wet trail in wake, practically dripping onto him. He planted another kiss on your lips, this one was softer than all the others but still portrayed the rabid need he had for you.

He was admiring you. Taking his sweet time. There was an incredible yearning for you inside of Aaron. It was as if his entire body was buzzing from how horny he was and the pressure in his cock was beginning to become too much for him to take. He needed to be inside of you, to feel your pulsing walls wrapped around him.

You didn't appear to be enjoying his pause of admiration as much as he was. It was obvious that you needed to be touch by the way you had slid your fingers closer to your core, ready to plunge them into yourself to get some sort of relief. But Aaron stopped you with a swat to your ass and a tut. You yelped in the surprise at the stinging feeling.

"I didn’t say that you could touch yourself." Aaron reprimanded. He palmed your ass, kneading your cheeks firmly with both hands.

"You’re so gorgeous." He breathed out shakily, completely enamoured at the sight of you above him. "I’m gonna keep you like this, fucking you and filling you up until you're swollen with me.”

Another whine slipped out of you as you jerked even closer to him, clit rubbing against his shaft in long, slow movements.

"Do you want me?"

"Of course." Aaron had never felt more satisfied than he did in that moment, hearing your reply.

Aaron helped you balance on a foot and knee, coming up higher and spreading wide so that you line the head of his cock up with your entrance. His hand on your hip stopped you from sinking down completely, instead he used his other to gently and slowly drag the thick head of his cock through your folds, coating it in your slickness. Aaron enjoyed torturing you and seeing the twisted look of annoyance that took over your face, it was adorable. There was an obvious look of need that crossed over your face as you bucked your hips, trying to get him to slide into you.

"I don’t know if you deserve this," Aaron mused, sounding far too calm and unaffected by the situation "you’ve been such a bad girl." He started withdrawing himself from you, hands leaving your flesh, but you reacted quickly, grabbing a hold of his wrist and tugging it back to your hip.

"No, no, no, please, Aaron. I’ll be good, I’ll be so good, please just-" It was beautiful the way you pleaded for him. He wouldn't have stopped either way, but Aaron loved seeing you beg, to know that you wanted him as much as he wanted you. It was so painfully obvious that you were ready to do just about anything for his cock.

It was easy to relent, to let you finally sink down onto his massive shaft and let him bury his thick cock to the hilt inside of you. The moan that you let out as you felt him inside of you bounced across the walls until it was cut off by has large palm covering your mouth.

“Jesus Christ, you take me so fucking well, sweetheart, but you have to keep it down” Aaron felt like he was almost in disbelief, elated from the sight of his throbbing cock disappearing into the sweetness that was you, buried deep inside your slick warmth. You felt so good, so perfect, walls tightly gripping every inch of him as they pulsed. You let out a shuddering gasp as he bottomed out.

Aaron didn’t let you adjust, not really, he only allowed you to stop for a few moments, basking in the feeling of your fluttering walls clenching around him before he urged you to pull up and sink back down onto him roughly, bouncing up and down rapidly.

"Feels so- good." You breathed out shakily between urgent thrusts and grinding of hips.

"Yeah?" Aaron cooed as he watched you pull back up, only keeping the very tip of him in before sinking back down. "You like my cock? I’m gonna make you feel so much fucking better."

He planted his feet firmly on the ground and delivered a sharp and precise thrust upwards the next time you came back down.

"Aaron!" You cried out, falling forward as pleasure mixed with the slightest hint of pain bloomed through you. You braised yourself, holding yourself up by the back of the couch as Aaron slid down to get better leverage and began drilling into you at an unrelenting and frenzied pace. His grip on your hips was so incredibly hard as he used it to slam you back against him, but you didn’t care, too lost in the waves that were overtaking you. You had to bury your face in the crook of his neck in an attempt to keep quiet.

All mercy had left Aaron as he forced you down onto him over and over again, small praises escaping his lips every now and then as he met each movement with one of his own. You moaned and whined helplessly, clawing at the fabric of the couch underneath your hands, needing something to hold on to through his ruthless thrusts.

"You feel so good around my cock, sweetheart." He praised in a murmur. "So fucking tight." Aaron grabbed a hold of your arms, pulling you off him and down, pressing your face deeply into the couch and pulling your ass high up in the air before entering you again swiftly and continuing pumping into your sweet cunt. He had you pressed down firmly by the back of your neck, your back arching as the sound of skin slapping and the wet squelches of your sopping wet pussy echoed around the room. It made you even more drenched; the mixture of your pleasure pooling around the base of his cock, running down the inside of your thighs.

One of Aaron’s hands shifted to palm at your ass while the other travelled downward to roll and lightly pinch at your clit while rolling his hips and you writhed against him.

"You’re gonna be a good girl and cum around me." He instructed lowly followed by a sharp slap to your right ass cheek. “Can you do that for me?"

Aaron pushed you down even further into the couch for just a short moment and a deep thrust before you could heed his command, unsheathing himself from you.

He didn’t even have to begin to miss the feeling of you clenched around him before he had wrestled you into the next position he wanted you in with legs bent as far as they would go over your chest and back to the couch so that he could easily drill into you in deep and sharp strokes, but he didn't enter you just yet. He leaned back, admiring you as his hands spread you wide, baring you to him. You had the prettiest pussy he had ever seen, and he was compelled to kiss it. A sweet kiss and a short suckle on your clit that had you crying out from oversensitivity before he sank slowly into you again.

Aaron felt himself slowly losing whatever composure he had left as your muscles began to tighten around him over the coiling tension that was begging to snap. Your walls gripped him tighter and tighter until finally, Aaron watched as your eyes rolled back when reached your peak, walls spasming and drawing him deeper and deeper in. You were seeing stars as your legs shook uncontrollably from the overwhelming feeling.

Aaron couldn’t stop or slow down as he continued pumping into you throughout your convulsing climax. His breaths were coming out in short pants as he praised you, telling you how good you were and how beautiful you looked in that moment.

You reached up, treading your fingers through his hair to pull him down slightly to connect your lips in a kiss. It was soft; a lot softer than any kiss you had shared previously.

"You're so pretty when you cum for me." He murmured after he let you come down for your high for a few moments whilst leaving kisses on your neck. Aaron picked up the pace of his hips once again, balls swinging as they slapped against you every time he pressed himself into you.

He was deliberately rubbing his pelvis flushed against your clit to drive you toward the edge again. He needed to see you fall apart for him again, he craved it. It was easy for Aaron to tell that you were close to the edge once more. Your eyes had began glazing over again, becoming hazy with lust as your legs started to tremble.

"Think you can come again?" He didn't expect a reply from you, Aaron didn't actually think that you were coherent enough at that moment to even begin to form a word with your lips. Instead, you were babbling like a brook with an arm over your mouth to muffle your sounds. Your back arched, jutting out your chest as your second orgasm was steadily building up inside of you.

"Fuck. You look so good fucking gorgeous like this.’ He praised with a wet and sloppy kiss to your lips.

Aaron was so close to coming, but he wasn't finished just yet, surprising you as he flipped you over one last time, planting you on all fours before pushing your front over the arm rest. He didn't care if it wasn't the most comfortable position as he drilled into you, and neither did you, judging by your breathless moans. He needed to be deeper in you. 

"I'm so close." He groaned out, hips starting to stutter, unable to keep up the tempo he had previously kept so easily.

Aaron’s orgasm washed over him with a deep jerk forward, spilling into you with a groan. He continued thrusting into you, albeit at a much more languid pace, milking himself completely dry as he twitched slightly. He didn't want to withdraw from you, but when he finally did, he couldn't help but admire the way he leaked out of you. Now that he knew what you felt like, he would never be able to let you go.

[cloudninetonine]

Ugh I was just thinking about the procession of game events with the chain, specifically Hyrule, and it gives me heartworms to imagine Guide playing his game as a child, and so that it’s just 2 children fighting against the world who only have each other, then they meet again as adults in the flesh and one of them immediately recognizes the other and seems to fall in love at first sight…. Ugh what true love Im melting.

Conversely you apply this to other members like Time and Legend, who have had it rough and it quickly sours. Legend, who has someone who has been there through his worst times, always the same age and so they grow together but simultaneously grow apart due to circumstances beyond their control, and so he blames them for leaving him, a childhood friend that he can’t trust to stay when he needs them. It’s like the inverse to the Hyrule dynamic: a childhood love that curdled rather than bloomed.

And finally Time. God, Time, who already struggles with coming to terms with his own journeys and how they impacted his age, both mentally and physically in the sense that he and Guide started off together the same, as children, Time finally has another friend other than Navi or Saria, one that will also disappear like them but one day they come back, and… they’re really much younger, a decade at most. And Time is suddenly in the position of no longer friend, rather guardian, protector, even a guardian figure. It distorts the relationship past what it initially was. So in conclusion you’ve got: 1) a classic childhood friends to lovers plot that is sweet in its earnestness and simplicity. 2) a bitter rift between once friends, now strangers who have to learn to trust each other again. 3) a dynamic in which 2 people care for each other so much, but time and circumstances distort that relationship and suddenly one of them is wiser, more battle-bruised, more traumatized. In a way, completely unrecognizable, like a war veteran coming home to their sweetheart but they’ve been completely changed by their experiences. Ahhhhh it’s all so tragic 😭😭😭 I could retrospect it all day, I’d love to hear your thoughts on it, even with the other Links and, y’know, coupled with the fact that most of them can’t even remember Guide, so that’s yet ANOTHER box on top of the already big pile of emotional shit everybody’s going through.

ANON WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME I'M IN PAIN

Coming in with a false sense of fluff with Hyrule and Player and the idea of Real true love then slapping me with the crushing pain that follows the Veteran and Old Man like the stench of death to a corpse 😭😭😭😭 I love it by god it fucking hurts to read it. Legend's bitterness and Time's feeling of lost, well, time being forced to grow up faster because of everything he went through

I need a fucking drink /j

[anxiously-sidequesting]

So I once made a funny shit post about the Young Wizard actually beaming to the Spiral at the tender age of 45 but it got me thinking of the opposite. What if the Wizard was incredibly young

Since in the game it isn't specified at what exact age we arrived in the Spiral I think it's just up to the player to come up with that part. I personally like to think The Wizard was around 7 or 8 when this happened but what if they were actually like four or five years old

Like shieeeet that's young enough where we wouldn't really remember our time on Earth very clearly right? Our family and maybe our friends but unless we had like ungodly memory powers, we wouldn't be able to remember all of the details of our original home. Like isn't it proven that human beings first gain self and special awareness at 3 or 4? Something like that

And this can open up for some sweet scenarios - little kid Wizard running up to Malorn with a scribbled drawing of him with a big smile on his face, or us and Ceren reading picture books together or clinging onto Nolan's robes as we attempt to stand on his feet as he walks like a penguin, but there's also this sad and messed up undertone that in this universe Ambrose took what was essentially a child just out of toddler stage and decided to keep them in the Spiral instead of returning them to their family

And like imagine how that would affect us. We would see it as normal at first because we grew up in the Spiral, we spent more years in the wizard world than in our home on Earth, but what if the Wizard gained awareness later on in life and actually realized what happened. Would they even care at that point because the Spiral was integrated in them at such a young age? Would they feel any yearning towards their original family, would they miss them at all? Would the Wizard be bitter about not getting to know them?

It's different when you're 7 - 10 and onwards because at that stage in your life you've more than gotten used to Earth life. You've gained awareness and it has been emotionally and mentally established that THIS (Earth) is your home. You know your parents and you know your friends and you know your environment. You will miss that when it's gone and feel it's absence because you're old enough to at least notice when you're taken away from it. But when you're still at that impressionable and oblivious stage of like 4 - 6 years old? The Spiral is all you know now. Your parents faces will be blurry, you may not even remember the details of what your home looked like. You may remember certain smells, colors or feelings you experienced when you were on Earth but that may be about it. And the saddest part about that is depending on what Ambrose and the other adults put our Wizard through, we may grow to completely forget even those essential memories. That Earth part of us would TOTALLY be gone and that would include even our parents (or other caretakers). I'm crying actually

[consistentsquash]

HP Femslash Recs from 2023 (January to June)

Recs for new femslash fics posted in first half of 2023. January to June! One fic for each month. Rec lists are based on my reading and what I like. YMMV.

Theme - HP ladies rocking their queer side during different stages of their lives. Some of them are also rocking their dirtybadhotwrong side <3

AO3 collection

  Petunia Comes First by DepravedDesires (January)

Themes - dirtybadhotwrong

Pairing - Petunia/Lily

Rec because - dirtybadhotwrong femslash is the best starting fic for this list. We stan! Petunia definitely deserves to come first.

How dare Lily ignore her until there was something she needed from her sister? Typical Lily, making a mess of things and then getting someone else to clean it up for her.

  Candles Lit Against the Dark by @perverse-idyll (February)

Themes - Retirement + Healing

Pairing - Minerva McGonagall/Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank

Rec because - This is so totally the retirement life I want. It's packed with beautiful friendships, people focusing on the sweet instead of the bitter, people moving on together, people forgiving each other. It's an incredible fic with perfect execution on some classic tropes like matchmaking and friends who are going to help you whether or not you asked for it. Also some not so classic tropes like celebrating a female character's life/happiness/love being the center of a rich fic. Ultimately this is Minerva McGonagall's fic and I am so here for it. Her life is full! She's done a lot, she's got the perfect retirement and her friends are her best fans. It's got a big cast and everybody is characterized really vividly. This fic is like fruitcake. But really, really rich homemade fruitcake. It's just juicy and bursting with flavor. ~~Sorry, Claxton Fruitcake Company~~. Also this fic has the Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank for me. Of course PI's Snape has been the Snape for me from the first time I read When the Rose and the Fire Are One. Speaking of Snape. Oh yeah!!! We get Snape. Lots and lots of Snape. Also some lowkey/not so lowkey Snarry flirting. But definitely don't pass on the fic if you are squicked by Snarry. This fic is so much more than that and you definitely won't be squicked by anything. I am normally a YMMV person when it's about squicks because those can be pretty subjective but I am giving a no squick guarantee on this fic. READ IT <3

At around four in the afternoon, with three chapters to go in the espionage novel she was reading – since popular thrillers provided not only diversion but an eye-opening refresher course on Muggle slang and cultural attitudes – Minerva glanced up from the page to find Wil leaning in the doorway, watching her.

Reccer note - If you don't normally go for PI's works because of the bittersweetness/ambiguity/intensity, this is a perfect intro fic you can read in any headspace. You get the Trademark PI Snape with lots and lots and lots of nonstop healing/good times and a 100% extra virgin pure legit happy ending. ~~No rimming though~~ We got gloves! But seriously. We get some of the classic PI themes like Ego Death, Real Death, Forgiveness, Atonement but these heavy themes are present without feeling heavy. My theory is PI drank a lot of champagne to get this nonstop bubbly effect in the fic.

  Once of Eden by eldritcher (March)

Themes - Crossgen + Coming of Age

Pairing - Lily/Eileen

Rec because - Poignant and super sharp character study of Lily. Lots of storms inside her head about her family/war/Petunia/Snape. This is right before her marriage but she has this feeling she doesn't fit into that life and she doesn't want to let go of her past. Like a lot of us, she's also seeing her past/childhood through these nostalgic glasses but at the same time she's also noticing adults in her life and has this bittersweet feeling that she's an adult now/making adult choices now. Serious Catcher in the Rye vibes. This fic has the Lily for me. Really like Harry, really Gryffindor. Don't let the pairing put you off. It's a really beautiful, sensitive, unique, powerfully human fic.

She knew there were girls who did this. Petunia and she had giggled about it once or twice. Sirius talked a great deal about how he liked watching girls kiss each other. It got him going like nothing else, he said. This would not get him going. Eileen was Severus's mother. Eileen was not a girl. She was sullen and cross, but not right then.

Reccer note - A great eldritcher intro fic for Marauders era readers. It doesn't have the rollercoaster intensity of their other fics. Definitely more approachable. But you can also see some of the classic Eldritcher themes about Nostalgia + Returning Home to find out nothing's going to be the same again + Permanent loss when one door closes in your life + all the characters being flesh and blood people you can empathize with without self-insertion. This fic made me cry but it was a healing cry. I don't normally see femslash fics hitting these themes so it's unique in my reading experience.

  Nymphadora, Nymphet by @thistlecatfics (April)

Themes - House of Black ladies being House of Black ladies

Pairing - Bellatrix/Andromeda, Bellatrix/Tonks

Rec because - Thistlecat has my whole heart for how she characterizes Bellatrix in this fic <3 Love, love, love. Also Tonks! This fic is layers and layers of delicious dirtybadhotwrong and at the same time a brilliant character study. Also the first time I have actually seen Lolita in a femslash fic. Whoa, love. AU premise but definitely don't let that make you skip this. Totally, totally pays off.

She had changed her hair for them. They asked about size, and she grew tall and then short. They asked about shape, and she gave herself broad shoulders, pulling at the seams of her shirt, even with the charms her mother had added to give her freedom of movement after the sheer number of clothes she had torn apart as a child in playing with her physical form. They named body parts, and she adjusted them as they asked, all four of them laughing. She was having fun. It was a challenge! They were going so quickly. When they said to make her breasts larger, she obeyed. She had played so little with her breasts, which had just started to grow, and flesh was so easy and fun to work with. They asked for bigger, and she threw her shoulders back and let them grow.

  Knotweed by @turanga4 (May)

Themes - Relationship resolution, war era

Pairing - Poppy/Pomona

Rec because - because I love fics which show us why it's important to focus on the good things/the important things during bad times. Pomona said it best! <3

“I need things to live,” Pomona continued. “I need things to grow. If I’m going to fight, I need a bit of why we’re fighting. I want this—want us, want you— for as long as I can have it.”

Leather by @saintsenara (June)

Themes - self-discovery, war era

Pairing - Tonks/Fleur, Tonks/Charlie, Tonks/Remus, Tonks/OFC

Rec because - I love this fic. It's got so much self-discovery with lots of good emotions but with a huge contrast against the war tension. Love how Tonks makes the best of each day because she doesn''t know what's going to happen tomorrow. Also love the confusion/acceptance/exploration cycles in the fic.

She’d learned the term for it eventually, and knowing the word had given her the power to understand herself - it was like magic, in that sense. The first person she’d told had been Charlie, as they relaxed - eighteen years old and feeling very grown up - after their first fuck. It had been nice - tentative and halting and all very un-British and sincere - and she’d confessed and he’d looked at her with his lovely round face and confessed the same. And they’d laughed and laughed at how they would be able to compare notes in future on what they sampled from the buffet of human genitalia.

Reccer note - Legit character studies of bi characters are super rare in our fandom. I don't really go for self-discovery type fics but this one is whoa! Love, love, love and highly recommend this one. It's out and proud and amazing. <3

[50cal-fullauto-astarion]

Stallard BS bc it’s my Friday night and I’m thinking about Her 💃🕺🏻

She’s 6’00”/183cm tall and a power lifter. Straight black hair that’s she’s been growing out and trimming herself since she was a kid, hits her hips. Born a blonde, went box black after the divorce and burning the house down. One of the only times in her adult life she cries is when it catches on fire and she has to buzz cut what’s left. I don’t think she ever grows it out again.

Her government name is Saeda Make-Sure Stallard II. She’s a junior, and the middle triplet, last one left. Her oldest full twin was Nesta Make-Even, and her youngest sister was Beaurie Make-Off.

Oh god I’m listening to Zach Bryan’s new album fuck me it’s so good.

She was called Little Saeda at home, and her mother was Big Saeda. And Big Saeda has always been too fuckin’ much for the world. She practiced blood magic—whether it worked or not there is horror to making yourself bleed for grasps at power—and her only daughters were covered in scars from learning the practice. Little Saeda no longer practices, she says, but when times are bad, new, neat little nicks and notches show up on her body and she stops meeting eyes with her head held too tall.

Wears gold medallions for Saint Jude and Saint Christopher alongside three gold crosses on two gold chains around her neck. If asked, it’s not for the Trinity, it’s for a thief and two martyrs.

Was raised snake dancing Pentecostal and has wasted many, many years bitter that God never deigned to speak to or through her. She was a tainted, unworthy little girl, just like her mother, even if her twins felt the spirit. She was a thing that God did not have time for, but a thing that the snakes loved, curling sweet around her wrists.

The last promise her daddy ever made her before his death was to not cut up her twins and feed the bits to pigs if she just stopped hiding.

She can do voice impressions. In another life she was a voice actress, but, still, she finds uses for it.

Her big tragedies got out of the way early, making room for a hundred years of life filled with mounting little humiliations. A wind blows through her, her thoughts have long stopped screaming and fallen silent.

The first dance with her ex-husband was set to “I Walk the Line” by Johnny Cash, which should’ve been an omen if she was listening. Everyone worth their fuckin’ salt knows that Johnny Cash wrote “I Walk the Line” for his first wife, while he was out running around on her—fucking, drinking, drugging, and pining for June Carter while Vivian Liberto raised their four girls and read all the fuckin’ tabloids. It was “Flesh and Blood” that he wrote for June Carter, but hardly anyone cares, because it doesn’t fuck as hard.

And apparently, neither did Stallard, because her marriage ended in adultery and over-indulgence by her husband, too. “I Walk the Line” is a cursed fucking song in her hymnal.

Lost her virginity at 22 to the love of her life. Lost him a few years later. But he came back, as risen-dead things tend to do.

Major horse girl.

Nigh’-nigh’!

[thenightling]

Disney’s Haunted Mansion (2023) review

Last night I saw Disney’s The Haunted Mansion and it was surprisingly good. The main antagonist is The Hatbox Ghost, whose real name is Aleister Crump. The first name is from Aleister Crowley, whom he has a similar, though loose, backstory.  The surname is from Rolly Crump, a Disney artist who helped design the Haunted Mansion Ride and a lot of its features.  That was a nice homage.  There are lots of nods to the famous Disney Park ride and yes, Mr. Gracey is in it, but he’s not as big a character as he was in the 2003 version with Eddie Murphy.  I’m not usually a big fan of Jared Leto or his questionable method acting.  I have seen his “Joker” and his portrayal of Dr. Michael Morbius. But this was probably my favorite of his roles.  I cannot tell if that was his voice or not as the Hatbox Ghost being processed to sound deeper and creepier or if it was someone else’s voice.   Either way it was really well done.  And Jared Leto finally found a role where he is supposed to be a hammy creep.  I liked this version of the Haunted Mansion a lot more than the 2003 version with Eddie Murphy. There was a little more depth to this one.  And more interesting characters rather than the cliche workaholic father. This version dealt a lot with themes of grief and yes, there is a bit of a found family in it. My one complaint is something that happened with Madame Leota.  In this version of the story Leota was trapped inside her own crystal ball by The Hatbox Ghost.  Toward the end of the movie one of the protagonists uses a spell to free her but then shortly afterward Leota delivers the line “I can feel the spell fading and soon I will be returned to my crystal ball.  It’s not so bad.  It’s actually quite spacious in there.”  Why do this?  The Hatbox Ghost was defeated.  It doesn’t make sense. There’s no reason for her to have to return to the crystal ball.  If it’s about selling the merchandise there are plenty of scenes of her inside the crystal ball already.

It almost feels like this annoying detail (and the only part I don’t like) was added by some bitter Disney employee who was angry he didn’t get to keep Binx trapped as a cat for all eternity in Hocus Pocus.   In general it was a fun movie.  That bit about Leota having to return to her crystal ball was the only part that bothered me.      I do think this may have been strategically released toward the end of July in the hope of recreating the cult classic that emerged from Hocus Pocus- a rare Disney sleeper hit.  Either that or Disney just had no faith in it because of the failing of the first attempt at a Haunted Mansion movie.  Based on the twelve week or so gap from theatrical release to home video Disney set this up so that it would be on DVD and Blu Ray and streaming just in time for the Halloween season. This was a fun movie, not too scary, but horror enough that I think adults won’t get bored.  Some of the characters (including ghosts) could have been developed better though. Part of me hopes for a sequel while another part of me dreads the franchise being milked to the point of annoyance like the later Pirates of the Caribbean movies.  Also the reveal that Trevor’s father was dead was easy to predict.   But it is still a family film despite the PG-13 rating so some moments have to be easy for the kids to figure out.  Not everything has to subvert expectations. And often subversion is done poorly in Hollywood anyway.              It was a fun film though. And some moments were genuinely sweet, such as the idea of ghosts sending small and subtle messages to loved ones like that cute cat, Tater Tot.  For those keeping score, there are now three Disney Haunted Mansion movies. There's The Haunted Mansion (2003), Muppet Haunted Mansion (2021), and Haunted Mansion (2023). There’s some good atmosphere in the movie too and some subtle homages to films like Poltergeist.  I liked it. 

[randomvarious]

Today’s compilation:

Now That's What I Call Music! 2 1999 Alternative Rock / Adult Contemporary / Pop-Rock / Teen Pop / Pop / R&B / Hip Hop

Back with another dispatch from the early run of the US' Now That's What I Call Music!, with the second installment from this gargantuan, neverending series. Take yourself all the way back to 1999 with this great ad for it!

Now, I definitely have not kept up with Now for a long while, but as a series that's known for repackaging huge chart hits on CD, I think this might have been its most unique volume of all, because a lot of these songs did not end up charting all that high in the US—at least not on Billboard's Hot 100—and a number of them actually fared far, far better in the UK, which is where Now originated from, with its first ever release dating back to 1983.

A prime example here is Robbie Williams' great pop hit, "Millennium." Williams is regarded as an absolute pop superstar in the UK, but he's only charted twice as a solo act on the Hot 100 in the US, and both of those singles have failed to reach the top 50. This one, which pairs recreated dreamy strings from James Bond's You Only Live Twice theme with a hip hop-type backbeat, only made it to #78, but it was a #1 hit across the pond! And I think outside of all that well-made, Swedish-produced teen pop/boy band fare, this one very well might've been the best pure pop song of the entire late 90s. The use of those epic Bond strings smacks of The Verve's "Bitter Sweet Symphony" too, which certainly suggests that there's something about Brits and those damn strings.

And another #1 UK smash that didn't do nearly as well in the States was Fatboy Slim's irresistible big beat summer classic, "Praise You," which sampled from a lot of different places, including a Disney disco record, a JBL test album to get those iconic keys, Steve Miller Band, the Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids theme, and a song by Chicagoan Camille Yarbrough called "Take Yo' Praise," from which Fatboy Slim took the lyrics. There was a whole undercurrent of this big beat stuff that was coursing through a lot of our commercials and movie and video game soundtracks back then, led by acts like Fatboy Slim himself, the Chemical Brothers, and The Prodigy. But it never went super mainstream like it did in the UK. Fatboy Slim's singles only charted twice in the US on the Hot 100, and "Praise You" was the best-performing one, making it to #36.

By the way, I have a really killer turn-of-the-millennium-type summer playlist on Spotify that has a bunch of songs like "Praise You" on it. It's called "An Endless Capri Sun or Juicyfruit or Starburst Commercial From Like the Summer of 2002," which will hopefully give you an idea of the type of vibe that I was trying to channel with it. God, I love that sun-shining big beat stuff!

And color me surprised to hear Jay-Z on here, because until 2001, Now pretty much seemed to purposely go out of its way to avoid hip hop altogether. I guess it makes sense though, since the music usually has explicit themes, and these albums are typically targeted at kids. But they really just couldn't help themselves when it came to Jay-Z's first real, true breakout hit in "Hard Knock Life" here. Mark the 45 King's novel sampling of the song of the same name from Annie made this one feel very kid-friendly and fun to sing along to, despite the numerous lyrics that had to be censored from it to get it on radio in the first place. Funny, though, that in a very American 90s way, and in a pre-onset-of-mass-shootings era, that they'd let a line like, "when my situation ain't improvin', I'm tryina’ murder everything movin'" slide through without any kind of edit. I mean, if they're playing this song on radio now, I'm thinking that that line gets hit with some kind of sound effect. But it didn't in '98 and '99, and that feels pretty remarkable in hindsight, especially since hip hop verses were constantly censored on radio, MTV, and BET, so much so that some songs felt like the track was getting jammed up at certain points 😅.

So, honestly, this might be the most unique release that Now ever put out in its main US series, as it seems to be the volume that's the least concerned with overall chart success among its selections. It still comes with some staples you'd expect, from Britney's "...Baby One More Time" to Everclear's "Father of Mine," effectively running a small radio gamut from the poppiest of pop to the most banal of alternarock, but acts like Robbie Williams, Fatboy Slim, Garbage, and even Cake are on here, and as an entity that's chiefly known for presenting the *biggest* pop hits of the day, those are probably some names that you wouldn't typically expect to be on a US release from this series.

And it closes with that odd Baz Luhrmann spoken-word advice column about wearing sunscreen that you might have totally forgotten about too. That one's probably the most ephemeral song of all on here; the ultimate entry in any sort of 'only 90s kids will remember these songs' type of list.

Hopefully you get a sweet memory-jogged nostalgia rush from some of these other songs I didn’t make mention of.

Highlights:

Britney Spears - "...Baby One More Time" New Radicals - "You Get What You Give" Robbie Williams - "Millennium" Semisonic - "Closing Time" U2 - "The Sweetest Thing (Single Mix)" Fatboy Slim - "Praise You (Radio Edit)" Garbage - "I Think I'm Paranoid" Cake - "Never There" 98° - "Because of You" Mýa & Blackstreet feat. Ma$e & Blinky Blink - "Take Me There" Everclear - "Father of Mine" Sublime - "What I Got (Clean Version)" Backstreet Boys - "I'll Never Break Your Heart" Jay-Z - "Hard Knock Life (Ghetto Anthem) (Edit)" Baz Luhrmann - "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) (Edit)"

[sensei-venus]

because i think fervent, intense, handsy, inexperienced young love is adorable (and i say this as a young adult myself) one concept i've been thinking about super often is having your first kiss with daniel at golf n stuff in 1984. you've been sharing a lemonade and now as you kiss each other, you can taste the lemonade on each other's lips. it makes what was already a sweet and soft kiss even sweeter and softer. you'd be lying if you said it didn't turn you both on. is it hard for me to drink lemonade the same way now? yes, absolutely.

This is the most pure thing I have heard in a while, yes just yes.

Imagine it's a decently chilly night in California, Daniel invites you out for a night of good old date fun. The first idea was to have a date at the local golf n stuff, play a round of golf and then hang out in the arcade for a while before grabbing something to eat at the concession stand.

After hours of fun playing golf and games in the arcade together, Daniel buys a lemonade for the two of you to share.

They walk outside and sit down together at the edge of the golf course. The air is a bit chilly as the night continues, the night drawing out. Daniel notices how you shiver a little at the cool damp air and slips off his signature red hoodie. He try’s his best to gently shove the soft hoodie onto you and the both of you laugh as your hands finally find their way out of the sleeves.

For a moment it’s just quiet as the two of you glance at one another. The dim lights of the golf course behind you glint across Daniel’s big brown eyes, his stupid boyish smile barley seen in the dark.

The kiss is quick to start. Daniel’s lips are soft with only a slight hint of dryness, the acidity of the lemonade drying them out a little. The sweetness lingers on his soft lips, his tongue tasted of sugar with a hint of sour. It made it that more addictive. It was like something you had never had before, and would never have again.

(Angst in this bitch)

Years later you would see his face again on a billboard, his face almost mocking you as you first enter the valley for the first time in decades. You would think, you would want to believe that your mouth would be filled with a bitterness’s, maybe even liquid regret in your own spit.

But the only thing you could taste in your mouth was the sweetness of cheap sugary lemonade and the tingle of acidity lemon on your lips.

[tsukiyadori]

Translation Quality of Fukou-kun wa Kiss suru shika nai Episode 1 on Viki

Since I saw somebody asking about the translation quality of Fukou-kun wa Kiss suru shika nai - I took a little look.

(Just the Viki episode 1 though, since I don't have a subscription and that's the only free episode right now. No Idea about Gagaolala's since I also don't have a subscription there either. Couldn't find what fansubs were referenced on quick look, so also no idea about that one. If somebody wants to provide sub-files I can take a look at the lines, too.)

My brain also blanked out with the OP and the ED has been skipped. (Spare me that bland canned Jpop please...) So no idea about the lyrics.

TL;DR first: Viki's for that episode is… passable. I have seen no hair pulling super major botches that are just utterly wrong and plot/context/characterization breaking. That being said, definitely don't expect brilliancy, either.

Some things that picked my attention in order of appearance:

In the prologue when Kouta talks about his type he uses 子 (ko). That implies a girl. After he drops the act, he's using 人間 (ningen) which means human. This was quaint, because usually you would opt to 人 (hito, person) for something more neutral. No idea what this is supposed to imply or if at all. Translations are fine there, just a lost nuance.

I'm sure I'll meet some great friends -> I'm sure there will be wonderful new meetings/encounters 出会い (deai) is used, which is meeting/encounter. This can mean all sorts of things in that vein, but expressly also means you might have your fated mate meeting (運命の出会い, unmei no deai). So it's definitely implied he's hoping for a bit more. (But the context also supplies this information already, so nothing really lost.)

This introduction was all lies! -> By the way, this prologue just now was COMPLETELY all lies!

That got shortened and also looses out on the typography of the sign. There is this playfulness JP typography that never seems to translate well outside.

Dropping the sweet act, here's my actual introduction This one is actually a good localization. In the fake prologue he uses boku for I (usually more innocently boyish) which then is switched to ore (more rude, manly).

And I've finally come to this conclusion: I'm just meant to be unlucky -> I've arrived at the truth, I have an unlucky condition This is maybe a bit nitpicking. But it's less a conclusion but more like he found the root cause (the truth) and the way he describes his condition is using (体質, taishitsu), which is a physical condition. So basically he takes it in like an identified chronic illness he has no means to get rid of, and that's a mood that reflects across everything he says (to himself), which is full of bitter salty anger, envy or resignation. He also gets pretty venomous nasty often enough, with much ruder, colloquial speech (extension to the switch to ore) which I don't quite think the English captures with as much of a contrast to what he says out loud all that much. The actor's voice does tho, so it still has that vibe from there.

Kirari is a sound effect onomatopoeic word describing a twinkle. Which is why this is a bit of a wild nickname to have as an adult (and a guy).

Typo Izakoi instead of Izayoi once, so QC is probably not the tightest, but also not the worst since there was only one.

Shinomiya gets translated to Naoya, which means this one abides by Western name referencing of first names rather than keeping the Japanese one of referencing last names and its registers of intimacy it denotes. This is jarring by default if you hear Shinomiya, but read Naoya, but it's pretty standard a thing to happen with Japanese translations. What definitely is bad tho is that there is no consistency, because Kouta's acquaintances call him Fukuhara, which is his last name. (If this show ever starts making Kouta switch from Shinomiya to Naoya, and they make a big blushy drama out of it, which the Japanese love to do, probably expect this to make no sense in the translation.)

What a formidable guy -> What a dreadful/frightening guy

lady killer This is obviously a bit awkward with it being in a BL coming from a guy describing the effects on himself, but that one kind of has no short English word. Japanese uses 無自覚天然たらし (mujigaku tennen tarashi). mujigaku means unaware, tennen is a natural airhead (the one that breaks hearts like breathing and never notices) and tarashi means very (in a bit of a condescending manner) and amplifies this once more. (If there is a good Engilish expression, I'm all ears!)

I was hoping we could stay together always - let's stay together That is super awkward, but the translator probably tried their best to retain some levels of ambiguity for the misunderstanding. The word used is 付き合い (tsukiai), which can mean accompany but very much also means dating. The way Kouta asks it is literally how you'd ask somebody out for dating, and he does this even in a very typical girly shy manner (completely in contrast with his thoughts in more guyish informal register).

Other than that, the translation definitely doesn't feel like natural English, but also not like that Engrish you'd get from a Japanese native person usually. (My guess is it's intermediate-advanced proficiency, one of the typical pit traps in that stage is still to be too literal and have Japanese sentence structures invade your translation.) Refreshing for one doesn't sound like anything a native English speaker would say to describe a person. What is meant here is a person who is kind of upbeat and agreeable to their surroundings, or somebody who's good at smoothing things out with their way of talking. (But also not suave or so.) Maybe affable, amiable, pleasant? (But then I don't think Westerners ever mumble so fascinated about a person after they're gone, bar in a more sexually/romantically/idolizing coded fawning sense to begin with…?)

[jo-harrington]

Random Stranger Things/Eddie Munson Headcanons

Hi all and welcome to the first-ish post on my tumblr. Man it has been a long time since I’ve been on this website/app, but of course I’ve been lured back by the internet’s new boyfriend, Eddie Munson. He is also what has me actively thinking about/writing fan fiction for the first time since I was a teenager and I plan on posting some if not all of it.

I'm a little nervous about my writing being a little rusty. So if anyone ends up reading these, just know that really is just for me to flesh out the random Eddie thoughts floating in my head, and maybe someone else will get some enjoyment or inspiration out of it too. So please bear with me...I'm sure it'll get better in time.

That being said, although I am only planning on posting indulgent, wholesome content (to warm my cold, dead heart), I am a grown adult and would please ask that minors DNI with my writing/headcanons. I might decide one day to venture into some steamy topics; better safe than sorry. (I know I just said I was writing fics as a teen. Do as I say, not as I do.)

That being said, let’s just dive in:

Eddie learned the guitar from his mother and his acoustic guitar actually belonged to her. I know there are a million headcanons about Eddie’s parents but I just feel like his mom was a sweetheart. But also it’s small town life; dad maybe was the big man on campus with his high school sweetheart wife who sang in choir and played the guitar and the things just went south for them and his dad turned desperate and bitter and abusive. But she's the one who kept him sweet and taught him the importance of manners and helped him develop this love of music.

Eddie’s mom dated Reefer Rick. It’s after his dad goes to prison; their marriage had already been rocky beforehand. In whatever story I’m concocting in my head, she worked at Benny’s and Rick was a regular and was sweet on her. Maybe at some point, they also lived with Rick, which is why Eddie feels familiar and comfortable crashing there and eventually hiding out there. And let's be real here, Rick has a whole house with a boathouse/boat and yeah in the show it kind of looks like a shithole...maybe it was his parents house and he inherited it...or maybe he got it with money from dealing but still, he's a grown man. He's at least around Karen Wheeler's age. He's dating Eddie's mom and he's got the cool step-dad vibes.

And then she dies when he’s maybe 10 or 11? And he really throws himself into the music/fantasy escapism. Like I just envision him spending summers and weekends at the library and just holed up in the children’s books section when his mother was alive and it was one of those things like “you can’t leave your kids here this isn’t a daycare” but again AGAIN it’s a small town. Everyone knows everyone’s business and Eddie isn’t making trouble when he's at the library so they just let it slide…but when his mom dies it’s him, sitting in some corner just reading and pretending he could be in Narnia or Middle Earth and his mom is alive.

Sub-thought to that…Wayne and Rick really trying their best to raise him. Obviously Wayne gets custody and he loves his nephew sure but it’s hard raising a kid ok? It’s a shock…and Eddie was just getting used to living at Rick’s. Wayne gives up his bedroom so Eddie has a place of his own. He switches to the night shift so someone can be there in the morning to take him to school or be home in the afternoon. But sometimes he picks up extra shifts because kids are also expensive and he doesn’t want Eddie going without. So Rick is there to pick him up from school and it’s the best of times. It’s snacks from the gas station and whatever radio station Eddie wants to listen to.

Hopper had a sweet spot for Eddie. Let’s be real, can Hop really be bothered to constantly have to bust this kid every time he gets into trouble? Again, it’s small town life and it’s all of these working class people knowing each other and interacting—there was a great headcanon I read that was like…Wayne is a great neighbor/knows everyone in town and that’s why he has all of those mugs. Like so spot on—so…if Hopper and Benny were friends, and Eddie’s mom worked at Benny’s, maybe she was friends with Hop as well? Or at the very least acquaintances. He’s gonna give the kid a break. (Officer Callahan on the other hand? It’s his life’s mission to catch this kid and actually punish him. Maybe also Rick? Is Callahan the reason Rick’s in jail? He really lets it go to his head once Hopper’s gone?)

Eddie had a bunch of friends from middle school onwards and they were the original Corroded Coffin. Because think about it. Eddie was 2-3 years older than Jeff/Gareth/the other Hellfire guy. (Minor segue headcanon—I’ve named him David because why not. And I will refer to him as such.) Let’s assume this middle school talent show happened when Eddie was in 8th grade, yes some of these kids would have been in 6th grade and yes some middle schools go 6-8. But I know I wasn’t down to hang out with 6th graders when I was in 8th grade. I know everyone was like “Eddie the freak” or whatever but he had to have some friends his own age at some point…which leads me to my next point.

His friends do end up graduating in 1984 and leave him behind. Which sort of drives the “forced conformity” thing even deeper in his mind. It’s a big falling out. They were gonna travel with the band, they were gonna hit it big…until they didn’t because one got a job at their father’s office and one went off to college or whatever. And there’s no more time for Eddie and his foolish things. When they leave he immediately writes them off. It was more than just some dream they gave up on, he feels like they’ve given up on him. Here’s where the new era of Corroded Coffin gets started. Eddie’s already got some underclassmen friends from Hellfire…why not them?

We have Jeff on guitar. I feel like maybe he would jam with the original Corroded Coffin on weekends before the revamp. He’s a fan of the band before he even really starts playing with them. (6th grade Jeff watching and saying “those guys are so cool” and then actually getting to hang out with them in high school). Gareth plays orchestral percussion before joining the band. He told his parents that he wanted drums for Christmas one year and they signed him up for timpani lessons or something. Maybe they’re older parents, little more conservative…he didn’t want to stir the pot. Gareth telling everyone he plays the drums when he is a freshman and joins Hellfire and then he really needs to hustle and put his money where his mouth is when Eddie says “you in or not kid?” And then David on bass guitar. David is a HUGE fan of Rush. Read some article/interview in a magazine with Geddy Lee and his love of bass guitar and never looked back. Catch him always suggesting a Rush song to cover and Eddie always let’s it happen because David honestly has passion for the music.

Our first impression of Eddie in the show—the dramatic, spectacle-causing, kind-of tough guy, leader of Hellfire act—is this remnant of the senior year confidence and is a mask he maintained as he remained in high school and everyone else moved on without him. Idk if I can articulate what I’m thinking properly but…you get to senior year, you’ve got your friends and the future ahead of you. You can do no wrong. That confidence. And with him having to repeat senior year twice over…he isn’t immune to the looks and the gossip but he has to maintain that mask because sure everyone thinks he’s a fuck up and at this point he is kinda alone—yeah he has the Hellfire kids and yes they’re his friends but…no one really knows him like those guys who have been alongside him for years. Since his mom died, even. Yes he is a dramatic person but that is just dialed all the way up so no one can detect his vulnerabilities. Especially as he stars taking these “lost sheep” under his wing, he can’t let that mask slip.

Wayne is the reason Eddie is still in school. His guidance counselor suggested a GED at the end of Eddie's first senior year when Eddie was failing miserably and there was really no fixing it. But Wayne is adamant that Eddie just stick it out. (“I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to but you’re better off with that diploma, son.”) And Eddie tries, he really does. There are some classes that he does great in and some he just…goes through the motions. A D still passes. That’s all he needs. Needless to say, some of these teachers…they’re just not nice. And he isn’t going to put in the extra effort when someone has it out for him and isn’t willing to meet him halfway. (Eddie never in the full uniform for PE, so he never gets the full participation points. And then Eddie trying to make this argument that it’s just gym and it’s a weekly spectacle in class as Coach says in his nasally voice that it isn’t gym it’s PE. Eddie also mocking that nasal voice. You know, not taking from any personal life experiences or anything. )

Anyway...he fails. AGAIN. And it is Eddie’s decision to stay another year. It was such a toss-up. It was one too many classes or credits than he could have made up in summer school. He tried. Wayne doesn't need to say anything. In fact, Wayne is about to tell him he can just drop out if he wants to. Get his GED. He isn't going to make this poor kid suffer through it again. But Eddie already has the speech down; he's going to try again. One more time. He has a plan. He's gonna trick the system. Something had to stick in his head from all of those failed classes. He just needs to fake his way through it and pass next year and he'll be Edward Munson, high school graduate. (“Then you’ll be proud of me.” “I’ll always be proud of you kid.”)

And then he repeats the year and graduates and NOTHING ELSE HAPPENS TO THIS POOR SWEET BOY.

Anyway I have more thoughts so I’ll probably post more but I’ll leave it at that for now. I guess let me know if there are any topics you want more thoughts about? (I need to figure out how to do asks...like I said it's been a while since I've been on Tumblr. So bear with me.)