#boyfriends with daddy issues is not only interesting. but hot. so I want to keep that element.

[forcedhesitation]

I'm actually still pretty disappointed about the changes that were made to implicate a canon relationship between gortash and the dark urge. you are given so much choice in this game! so it feels shitty that they took away your choice to interpret that dynamic how you'd like.

I had a dark urge campaign that I started and no longer will finish because I don't want that to sully my character's romance with wyll. it angers me enough how wyll is given barely any material for not just his story, but also his romance. like it's so unfair that rather than new material added to wyll's romance, all I was going to get was lines about how my character had a relationship with a fucking fascist. load of shit that is.

[rottingcorps3s]

"Daddy Issues" - J.P.

John Price x f!reader

Rating: 16+ (no smut, just cute) Word Count: Like 800?? Notice: Hey Alexa, please play “Daddy Issues” by The Neighborhood. I feel as if the title is self explanatory. A/N: It’s been a while since I’ve posted! Had a few ideas I wanted to get out so I decided to write this while I waited for Skyrim to download lol This was written on mobile and not proofread. Might make multiple parts of this, might not. But hope you enjoy!

His grip was tight on your hand. His fingers having completely engulfed your own as he pulled you through the crowd of people. His other hand holding onto the few shopping bags you had accumulated throughout the day.

John was an older man, not much older, but still older. You didn’t mind, obviously, but other people seemed to. It was evident in the stares from strangers that would linger just a second too long.

Is that your dad? You’d heard a hundred times over.

Is she your daughter? They’d ask John, a defeated look crossing his eyes.

When people realized that the two of you were in fact a couple, it tended to sour their mood. Seeing a younger woman with an older man their mind immediately went to Sugar Daddy. Which was far from the truth…kinda.

Did John spoil you? Definitely. Who wouldn’t want to? The multiple Cartier bracelets you owned, the 24k gold necklace that sat delicately against your sternum and the fact that your nails were always done every 4 weeks were proof of his generosity to you.

But your relationship was so much more than that. To him, you had done more for him than he’d ever be able to pay you back for. Your warm touch and inviting smile was all he needed to be satisfied, but you had gone further beyond that.

Since you had entered his life, not a day went by where he wasn’t thankful. Making sure he always had a hot meal waiting when he returned from deployment no matter the time of night. A hot bath already prepared by the time he was done eating. Your warm embrace waiting for him in bed as he washed away the horrors of war.

God forbid he spoils his woman a little.

You felt it happen a few blocks back, your shoe having slowly dragged your sock down the back of your heel and under your foot. It was driving you crazy, but the car was only a few blocks away. John could tell something was wrong as you seemed to lag behind him and stumbled every couple steps.

You had been looking into the window of one of the shops you passed by, seeing if anything interesting caught your eye before you were met with the solid chest of your boyfriend. You looked up at him and met his gaze, his eyebrows raised and a questioning look in his eyes.

“Are your shoes hurtin’ you?” he asked, pulling you off to the side to avoid being trampled by people.

You looked down at the shoes you were wearing, they were a simple pair of white sneakers. A pair John had bought you.

“No,” you said simply, a small smile forming on your lips as you admired him for a moment.

“You keep tripping over yourself?” he said as more of a question.

“My sock rolled under my foot, but I was just gonna fix it in the car.” You said simply.

His eyebrows furrowed as he listened to you, his eyes scanning your form and ultimately landing on your shoes. He paused for a moment, your gaze having wandered back to the window of the shop, waiting for him to start leading the way once more.

He let out a small sign before moving the bags he was holding further up his arm and got down onto one knee in front of you. His knees popping as he did.

You looked down at him with a questioning gaze before he gripped the back of your calf and set your shoe on his knee. You quickly gripped onto his shoulder as you used it to balance yourself. He made quick work of untying the laces and slipped your sneaker off. His hands felt ice cold against your feet as he gently pulled your sock back over your heel.

For as big as John was, he was extremely gentle. His fingers were calloused over and rough, but his touch was the complete opposite. He was nothing but gentle, and caring, and soft with you (unless you requested otherwise).

You felt your face heat up from the interaction, a deep red blush covering your cheeks as he slipped your shoe back on and tied the laces. He set your foot back down on the ground before grabbing ahold of the other one and doing the same thing.

People were staring, you both knew that, but it was such a sweet gesture that you completely blocked out the existence of everyone else around you. John stood back up once your other shoe was on, his eyes lingering on your face for a moment before he turned back around and continued to the car. Your hand still gripped tightly into his own.

You had a huge smile plastered across your face as you pushed yourself into his side. Your other hand holding onto his bicep, your nails gently digging into them.

“Thank you…” you said appreciatively. John smiled in response.

“Anything for you, love.”

(someone please stab me, I love John so much)

[absolutebl]

This Week In BL - These Are the Days of Our BLs

Aug 2023 Wk 2

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Laws of Attraction (Sat iQIYI) 5 of 8 - They cute making heart eyes at each other, but could we get back to punching & slutty silk shirts? OMG the poor rich kid & the bodyguard who wants to hug him SO BAD are KILLING me. I did giggle & yell “punchy punchies” during the fight scene before the fire. But Charn is a diamond-encrusted evil-gorgeous gremlin beastie, isn’t he? 

Only Friends (Sat YT) ep 1 of 10 - NO SINGING, but also.. wristbands! Sand is great = smart, snappy & over this shit. (Tired Gay 2.0) Neo & Mark are a revelation, where’d that chemistry come from? Force playing a douchenozzle is damn delight. Plus a counter lift in the first ep? Boys, you’re spoiling me. Mew is the least interesting, but Book is still adorable. Ray is the least likable character, but since it’s Khao, he’s the most likable screen presence. In fact, I’m enjoying all the messy messy gays & I know all their types IRL. I wish we had some femme & swish rep tho. Is this Thailand’s Queer as Folk? Seems like. Is it good? Not sure. But it is FUN as hell. Still, I gotta say it… they all dance like straight boys. 

Hidden Agenda that isn’t hidden (Sun GMMTV YouTube) ep 5 of 10 - Zo just wants to turtle & avoid but Joke is not gonna allow that. GMMTV keeps having sub issues (usually fixed within a few days). 

Low Frequency (Sat iQIYI) ep 6 of 8 - I do like the psychic gay detective trope. It makes this show more interesting and enjoyable. But they solved the mystery awful fast. I guess different drama spins the final 2 eps? 

Be My Favorite (Fri YouTube) ep 12fin - It was fine. I was fine with it. A kind of Vice Versa situation. The usual with Jittirain, as it turns out, is pretty simple: one of her main characters is going to be a manipulative liar or extremely unlikeable or both. It got an 8/10 from me, but probably should get a 7/10 just because I’m so exhausted by this. But I have to be fair and judge each BL on its own & not in light of repeat author mistakes. Not much of a trash watch here. Final full review here. 

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI) ep 7 of 10 eps - Boyfriend trip together. Terrible overalls. What the fuck? No. Meanwhile, perfect choice for college star. (Could Ton please lead out a new BL? I know I’m 0 for 2 with him but I’m willing to try again if he is.) I actually enjoyed this installment for a change. Perhaps “enjoy” is too strong a word. Not much happened, dog days of BL, perhaps that’s a good thing with Dino? 

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 6 of 12 - Mostly I was excited to watch this week because of Ben but there wasn’t much of him. Sadness. OK, I know it has STIFF competition but does this show have the worst music in BL, or is it just me? I still like Big Daddy & Hot Doc as characters but I am despairing over their arc (would we call it an arc?). All in all this week... Whatever.

Wedding Plan (Weds YT & iQIYI) ep 4 of 7 - I am officially being driven to drink. Trash watch is happening!

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Jun & Jun (Korea Thurs Viki) 4 of 8 - This show makes me laugh so much. It is so damn cute. And there’s so much language play going on. THEN . . . JUST ADD SIMON. I love a good Simon. Who doesn’t love a good Simon? I know SO MANY Simons. Now 3 boys are circling the ingénue (who I suspect is less innocent than he appears). So much delightful competition, postering & flirting. “My Jun,” is he, Simon? You are a precious angular stalk man, aren’t you? Pacing is great with this show. Every week I can’t wait for the next installment, that’s a hallmark of the best KBLs. If the language stuff confused you as much as it did me here is an EXCELLENT post on the subject that will help. 

Stay By My Side (Taiwan Fri Gaga) 7 of 10 eps - Sweetest seme. He’s hurt & mad at his boy but still can’t help taking care of him. I do like the courting with snacks & sweet little notes. (It’d work on me.) YAY!  Reunion kisses & nuzzles!!! Snuggling!!!! Gah! Taiwan, I love you. These 2 aren’t your best kissers but their cuddling is off the charts. I guess we are just gonna be plotless messy gay bfs for the final 3 eps? That’s cool with me. 

Sing My Crush (Korea Weds iQIYI) 3-4 of 8 eps - it’s adorable, they’re adorable, I’m enjoying it a whole lot. It’s like a very soft, low-stakes Addicted. 

Love Class Season 2 (Korea Fri Viki) 10 eps - I liked Love Class 1 (more than most on Tumblr) & I normally don’t want 2nd seasons. But this has an entirely new cast (in the “Replay” model). I’m fine with a 2nd season that has little or nothing to do with the first. J-min is an interesting choice of idols but he’s doing an unexpectedly good job. (He is a truly great rapper, by the way.) Trigger warnings out the gate... also this is complicated. Ready? We got 3 queer besties: artist gay Hyun (J-min), shy cafe gay Minwoo (in love with), sunshine gym bunny bi slut Maru (represent, my brother). Then we got Mr Put-upon-TA (+ boy who saw him nekid). And the twist = all black otaku Kim An (used to tutor artist gay in high school = exes ghosting DRAMA). This last reads as a hyung romance. Which you know I love. But it also feels v dark. All of which is to say, I am intrigued but a little nervous over the tone. 

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 1 of 8 - Classic JBL is back! This one is My Beautiful Man + Tokyo in April/Oh My Assistant. It’s odd and warped af but I like it. Very much has a the feel of old live action yaoi + VERY D/s. BRING IT JAPAN.

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) 6 of 12 eps - Shin is my sweet bean sprout and Minato should just boink him. Why all this waffling? I love the doctor. But mostly I’m as frustrated with this show as Shin must be in general. Minato 2- the season of blue balls.

Stay Still (Hong Kong Tues YouTube) 2 of 5 eps - I re-watched the first 2 eps & now find it a bit more comprehensible (yes 2: there is an ep 0). I don’t think we can expect this to end happy for either couple. It’s kinda sticky & grungy (in a way I’ve come to expect from the Philippines, although this is not as cluttered visually nor as brightly colored as the Pinoy stuff). I do kind of like that lived-in feeling, it reminds me of Taiwanese shorts. There is something very honestly queer about the primary leads (tattoo & babyface) in particular the way they dance queer? around each other: verbally, emotionally & physically - laying down breadcrumbs of gay for the other to follow. The secondary couple (reunion, cheating) is very sad. Although I do love a counter lift make-out sesh. (Occasionally Cantonese sounds like Vietnamese to me. Apparently I am not alone in this.)

Gossip - AKA P’ABL is Disappointed

I was gonna put a statement here but I just did it separately, earlier this week, since my ask box was overflowing regarding actor gossip and other stuff. 

Meanwhile, Stay With Me ended exactly as expected. Can’t say I didn’t warn ya. You watched this anyway? You got what was coming to you. I am entirely unsympathetic. 

 Next Week Looks Like This:

Look at that PACKED week. NIIICEEEE. 

Starting:

8/18 Dangerous Romance (Thai Fri GMMTC YT) 12 eps - Perth returns to lead out a BL, odds on that ever happening were slim. (Let alone Chimon.) Still here we are. Interesting times. Chimon plays a poor studious kid who hates the school bully but is forced to become his private tutor. Lurv results. 

8/19 Love in Translation (Thai Sat One31) 10 eps - Two strangers start working in a cafe together. Looks very pulp. No idea on international distribution. 

8/19 I Feel You Linger in the Air (Thai Sat Gaga) 12 eps - The time travel historical romance many of us have been waiting for. Adaption of y-novel by Violet Rain. Heartbroken architect is transported to the 1930s. From the producers of Lovely Writer.

8/20 My Universe series (Thai Sun iQIYI) 24 eps - This is sampler pack BL, 12 pairs, each pair gets 2 eps, not sure on the order they’ll drop. Known couples include EarthBank from Destiny Seeker and KaownahTurbo from Love Stage!!!, fresh faces otherwise. Jane to direct.

Still Coming in August 2023

8/22 Kisseki: Dear to Me formerly known as Miracle (Taiwan Tues ????) 13 eps - From screenwriter Lin Pei Yu (We Best Love, H3: Trapped) features a student doctor forced to take care of a gangster. I love the premise and like the writer, Viki or Gaga will get this one.  

8/23 Why R U? (Korean remake iQIYI) is supposed to be out this month, filming started in sept 22. I find everything about this hilarious. I mean if Korea remakes it, we lose all the sexy and then... would we have a story at all? No we would not. Not even for six short eps. It’d be like one of those mesh shopping bags.

8/24 Man Suang (Thailand movie, domestic cinema release) - historical drama about Thai burlesque with KP’s MileApo. 

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Talking grandkids. Made me snicker. (Low Frequency.)

The waist grab that launched a thousand gifs (Laws of Attraction). Okay it was last week but I gotta chronicle it here in the weeklies. For science. 

Sing My Crush. They are so damn cute. 

Thank you for the counter action GMMTV, please Sirs, may I have another?

Captain snark in the house. Of course they handed the best and most complex pairing to these two. Well done GMMTV. (Only Friends) 

I really did not expect J-Min to be this good. (Love Class 2) 

(Last week) 

[ophelian-darling]

I just read your more then words piece on jjba and I thought that it would be so fascinating if all the darlings in that scenario are related like how the jojo's are, and it is the darlings bloodlines curses to be the object of their jojo's desire and to ultimately break the jojo's heart and to be the jojo's one that got away so to speak , the dynamics of the relationships would change and give rise to scenarios like joseph trying to keep his heart breaks grandchild away from jotaro to try protect him from the pain of them crushing his heart

Link of mentioned piece.

Hi there precious anon, Hope you're doing great.

As of the concept itself, it does seem interesting: sort of a red string of fate but cruel; a curse that cannot be broken unless having darling yield to them.

TW : Emotional/psychological abuse.

Darling's bloodline has a subconscious cruelty and a meanness that is reserved only for the Joestars, as if wanting to break them and drive them to the worst fate possible.

The curse either continues or breaks Depending on each way a Joestar would react :

Jonathan is sweetly foolish and easy to be bent over to a beloved's will, he'll never be able to say no to darling and allow them to take control thinking that 'it's darling's way to show love', allowing the curse to continue.

Joseph would fall for darling, not able to see their obvious red flags (or ignoring them, believing that being mean isn't necessarily hatred) and continues to dote on them until he loses tolerance for your behavior. Joseph may appear as hot headed or a fool, but he's smart and has a sense of emotional dignity, so when he's had enough of your behavior, he does the extreme to tame you and force you to toe the line. you had to be under control .

Jotaro, a meaner version of Joseph, pays attention to the way he feels about you and keeps in mind the warnings his grandfather gave about you. deceptive as you are, you give him a false sense of safety and love, ready to strike at any second, and your attempts nearly succeed, until he manages to stop you.

Josuke and Jolyne are two sides of the same coin; both being cheerful and bubbly when tickled pink, mean and angry when provoked, until romance is involved: having a crush or a lover changes their mental state immediately (Josuke by the fact that he aims to romance as a high school boy, seeing what Koichi has with Yukako or the way girls fall for him, Jolyne by the previous experiences of having boyfriends and her daddy issues and emotional attachment problems). they keep ignoring whatever bad signs you show, forgiving each time and blaming themselves for your mistakes. unfortunately, it's never enough, they point out your behavior at times, yet there's no active solution to stop you.

Giorno, despite being young in age, has quite the emotional experience to deal with you. being raised in an abusive household taught him how to spot an abuser. Giorno restricts your freedom, limits your access to whatever you can win authority on, conditions you to be codependent on him. you have little unpredictable tricks here and there, yet he finds all your ways. He tells himself sometimes that he could leave you or easily get rid of you at any time, but his affection and love towards you intervene in the way, as a result, he has to keep a close eye on you for the rest of your life together.

Consider darling like the Joestars: different personalities and characteristics, but the evil and psychopathic behavior is common in darling's bloodline, its main goal is to break and control the JoJos regardless of the time period.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I hope I got a glimpse of them!

[somethingboutafic]

School

MARRIED FOR A WEEK?! by gravitycentered (M) word count: 20,424 Hi guys :) You might recognize Harry from one or two of my old videos .. I was tagged in the Married for a week challenge so I asked him to be my husband ! We had to live together for a week and take each other out on a couple romantic dates and that, check out the video to see how it went :) Give it a like if you enjoyed and maybe subscribe if you haven't already. Love you all - Louis x

precious little thing by mercutionotromeo (E) word count: 21,034 a university AU featuring phone sex operator Louis, copious amounts of sweet, soft kink discovery, and Louis being Harry's Daddy.

Counting The Steps Between Us by zarah5 (E) word count: 24,526 AU. So, yeah. That year abroad helped Harry establish that he is in love with his best friend. Now, if Louis would stop treating him like a little brother, that would be awesome. (Additional ingredients: a collapsing tree house, a lot of pining, the other three boys as Louis' new best mates from university, and a camping trip. Serve hot.)

Instant Pleasure by 100percentsassy (E) word count: 25,187 This fic has everything! College Roommates! Mario Kart! Julie Andrews! Demonstrative Pronouns! Flamboyant Dom Louis! Premature Ejaculation! Niall!

even the best laid plans by falsegoodnight (E) word count: 25,190 Louis wants to have sex with someone and decides Harry is the perfect alpha for the job.

Play the Odds by alivingfire (M) word count: 25,963 Harry and Louis are best friends since childhood who, after a night of drinking, find themselves locked in a bet: first one to kiss the other a thousand times wins. Wins what? They don't know. Glory, Harry supposes. Bragging rights, though those don't do much in this economy. All Harry knows is that this is one bet he can finally win. What he doesn't expect, though, is what happens when he starts kissing his best friend on a daily basis. Namely, he doesn't expect falling head over heels in love with his best friend. Now all he has to do is make sure the bet never ends, so he never has to stop kissing Louis.

fake it till you make it by falsegoodnight (E) word count: 28,777 After a serious error in judgement causes Harry to lie to his frat brothers about being in a relationship, he begrudgingly enlists his best friend’s omega roommate to help keep up the charade. There’s only one small issue…

This Shifting Ground by zarah5 (M) word count: 28,933 University AU. In which Louis, law student, is the cheeky waiter to Harry’s dates. This is how it starts.

voicemail sings a wreck by falsegoodnight (E) word count: 37,016 Louis is the president of the biggest omega sorority on campus, Harry is the president of the biggest alpha fraternity on campus, and they do not get along.

Play Pretend, Find a Friend? by angelichl (E) word count: 40,296 When Louis sees his ex-boyfriend kissing a random girl at a party, he acts out of blind jealousy. He kisses the first guy he can find. It turns into a thing. INSPIRED BY CLOUDS.

bruise you like a peach by falsegoodnight (E) word count: 40,695 There’s two reasons Harry despises Econ. The first is that it’s boring as fuck. The second reason is a bit more personal, a bit more focused in a way. As in it’s focused on one specific thing, or in his case, person.  His name is Louis Tomlinson.

Faking It by TheCellarDoor (M) word count: 46,173 Harry pretends to date his best friend to escape unwanted attention from a too insistent classmate and hopes it won’t blow up in his face. Featuring embarrassing dildo accidents, awkward boners, longing, first times, late night conversations, emotional discoveries and Niall as the exasperated friend with bad advice.

thinking about the t-shirt you sleep in by nonsensedarling (E) word count: 52,488 Harry's alpha fraternity donates to a local thrift shop (because of Liam's latent crush on a cute beta in his lecture). Louis' financial situation (and confusing omega instincts) lead him to make some interesting fashion purchases. Lots of pizza, feelings, and not-really-lying.

sleeping on our problems by falsegoodnight (E) word count: 67,429 Louis sleeps with Harry and they have more than just catching feelings to worry about.

Want You More Than A by TheCellarDoor (M) word count: 77,538 Falling in love with your step-brother’s best friend is a disaster enough. When he happens to be the boy everyone loves and you’re a nerd who wears sweater vests and cries during rom-coms, it takes it to a whole new level.

knock knock, i love you by beautlouis (E) word count: 86,066 Harry and Louis get kicked out of a statistics exam for passing a knock knock joke note, and subsequently fall in love. Harry's a virgin, there's a cat, a hot cocoa date, a lot of sex, even more knock knock jokes, and everything is lovely and happy.

Here In The Afterglow by fondleeds (NR) word count: 88,649 1970’s AU. In a tiny town in Idaho, Louis’ life is changed forever by the arrival of a curious stranger.

Red Brick Heart by hazmesentir (E) word count: 98,194 Uni AU. Harry had turned up at the halls of residence expecting fun, new friends, and maybe a life experience or two. What he doesn't expect is a surprise roommate who's loud and dramatic and obsessed with tea and is maybe, actually, all he's ever wanted.

we're not friends, we could be anything by nooelgallagher, yoursongonmyheart (E) word count: 115,506 The one where Harry and Louis are unlikely uni flatmates who definitely don't like each other and definitely won't fall in love (even if Liam and Niall think otherwise).

Never Be by cherrystreet (E) word count: 117,522 The one where Harry Styles moves to Connecticut from England for nine months as a part of a study abroad program, and he just so happens to move in with Louis Tomlinson and family.

Unbelievers by isthatyoularry (E) word count: 136,814 It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan. Or: The one where Louis and Harry definitely aren’t friends, and football is everything.

Bloodsport by isthatyoularry (E) word count: 172,653 A mortal enemies with benefits story with a touch of football, lust, and family drama. The Unbelievers Story from Harry's point of view.

Fading by tothemoonmydear (M) word count: 202,393 Louis knows about beauty; the combination of qualities that pleases the aesthetic senses. He creates that combination every day in the garments he designs while studying fashion at uni. The cut of the design, the color of the fabric, the intricacy of the stitching; it all comes together to create something beautiful. When the science student with the long legs and dimpled smile agrees to model for him, Louis decides he’s found beauty personified. Harry just thinks Louis needs someone to show him how beautiful he is.

[youngsuitcollection]

This could Occur To You... Dating Errors To Keep away from

Keep in thoughts, sugar daddy dating is more transactional than romantic. If two or more lights stay on in direction of the tip of the present then the man chooses simply two women he wants to search out out extra about. Asian women and white males are seen as probably the most desirable mates. דירות דיסקרטיות ברמת גן So, no two individuals are exactly the same-even two introverts won't be precisely the same. There are two varieties of testing know-how: detectors that record radioactivity, known as beta counters, and accelerator mass spectrometers. I just like the workaholic types. But who exactly did you want whenever you have been a teenager? I'd reasonably be with someone who does not love me enough. Only 9 % of ladies and a pair of p.c of men met someone in a bar or club. Men and women have a tendency to do this in equal measure, but the observe ends in plenty of unanswered messages. Education for males is all the time fascinating; for ladies an undergraduate diploma is desirable, whereas a postgraduate diploma decreases desirability. The researchers additionally found that folks used completely different communication strategies with individuals of various ranges of desirability. The researchers analyzed information gleaned from a free (unnamed) online dating service used widely in four major U.S.

A KFC representative instructed Polygon the game can be accessible without spending a dime on Steam on Sept. Unfortunately, Lili did not give any clues as to what their costume can be. Unfortunately, this additional effort often did not pay off. I would hate it, I wish to be the person to pay for every thing. But today, we wish to supply a new perspective as to how and why relationships flip sour, and that's resulting from dating pet peeves! Due to these apps we can make associates with people living in far corners of the nation. Living in L.A., by now it is best to know at the least ONE one that has hooked up with somebody sort of form of famous. Sunny Anderson’s previous boyfriends: She has been in not less than one relationship. So remember, pet peeves aren't just concerning the little issues that annoy you in a relationship. Dianne’s relationship remained a mystery for quite a while. “The strategy of talking with someone, planning to satisfy with them after which assembly them - it’s a lot of time and work,” says Guiser. Our concierge workers will guide you and walk you through our easy course of.

Marshall Williams shall be 33 years old in 156 days. To see my old friends. For example, individuals can opt-in to share photos posted on Facebook or Instagram to their Dating profile, or add Instagram followers to Dating’s Secret Crush characteristic, which allows for indicating crushes among Facebook buddies - and as of Thursday, Instagram followers - to see if the emotions are mutual. It can be exhausting to let a stranger know you’re not interested face-to-face, not to mention by way of an app. By the top of this quiz, we'll know exactly who you had the hots for and who had it for you in return. Were you one in all the many kids who had the hots for a cheerleader or a jock? Honestly, neither one is that important. I'd break their heart first. Everytime she smiles at you, your coronary heart skips a beat. Nope, and I do not plan on it. Nope, however I'm open to the concept. Meet in the middle and minimize your associate some slack each time it is reasonable to take action.

In response to eHarmony, 63 % of married couples met their partner through a buddy whereas 20 % met someone on-line. Did you discover somebody who piqued your curiosity? They've the energy of character to conquer hardship, find joy in the midst of adversity, and are greater than worthy of receiving and reciprocating love. Let's face it: Whether it was during high school, faculty, adulthood or all of the above, we've all been there with regards to discovering ourselves within the midst of a foul date. Food trucks converge on Kennedy’s The Grand Central each third Thursday, and there are drinks (supplied by Pourhouse) and stay music. The occasions are lively and fascinating. Have you ever been out for dinner with couples who're both on the left or right? Even in probably the most polite places of work, gossip spreads quick, notably juicy items about interoffice couples. Reddit customers use it to find actions, mates, parties, hookups, and even long-time period relationships. So let's discover out what your largest pet peeve is with this dating quiz! How would you describe your superb "type" of person to exit with?

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

NSFW Headcanons~ Stu Macher

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

- Stu is a whore. A blatant, wanton little whore. He’s been around and he’s rather proud of it. So yes, you’re dealing with someone who has a lot of experience under their belt.

- Stu is shameless, he’s lewd and he’s dirty minded, so don’t be surprised if he’s constantly making innuendos, hand/tongue gestures, and trying to get you into bed with him.

- Choosing to only give this boy head takes Olympian levels of self control because he does not make it easy. The sounds, the faces, the flush on his cheeks: he’s the type of guy who’s willing to let go and let you see how much he’s enjoying what you’re doing and that in itself is enough of a turn on; and an ego boost.

- Besides being a loudmouth with no filter, Stu’s also an exceptional pussy eater: a skill that he’s incredibly fond of demonstrating. Just try not to show the extent of which your legs are shaking after he’s finished because he’s already too cocky about it and you don’t need to give him another reason to flash his tongue at you.

- How he reacts to foreplay really just depends on the day. Sometimes he’s fully willing to sit and makeout for an hour; getting drunk on your affection, other times he’s whining and trying to get you to stop slapping his hands away so he can finally take your clothes off and touch you.

- He wouldn’t want anyone; besides you, to know it but he definitely enjoys being submissive. He doesn’t want you tying him up and whipping him but he does enjoy it when pretty girls take control of him; probably because he’s a tall boy with self worth issues.

- Depending on the day, Stu is either a hyper puppy who wants to move fast and ravage you, or a needy sub who wants you to go slow and torture him; regardless of how much he’ll whine and complain.

- You usually wind up riding him but you’ll occasionally find yourself bent over a counter as he presses kisses to your neck and squeezes the skin of your hips.

- Praise kink. Stu’s sort of used to being treated like shit and for a sensitive boy like him, that’s really rough, so he really enjoys when you compliment and validate him.

- Before you were dating, he definitely had one of those typical wet dreams where the love interest; in this case you, is sort of just there in lingerie for some reason, entering the persons bedroom and saying how they’ve always liked them as they climb into bed with them. He deserves to get bullied for how cliche his fantasies are.

- Needy, jealous sex. Sometimes he just really wants your attention on him.

- Please be nice to him. Touch him, hold his face, treat him gently. He deserves it; when he isn’t being a little shit.

- Prior to meeting you, Stu was used to and perfectly fine with normal, horny teenager sex; and to an extent he still is, but there was at least one point in your relationship where you took things slow and acted really sweet and loving with him and he hasn’t been able to get it out of his head. You left him in a tired, flustered pile and he will never forget that day.

- Lots of touching and kissing on his part. Stu is terrible at keeping his hands off of you.

- Pet names. He loves using them in general so it’s no surprise when they show up in the bedroom.

- Stu is obviously not a very serious person so having sex with him usually isn’t going to be very serious either. The two of you wind up smiling and giggling through half of it most of the time.

- Fooling around at parties and having somewhat tipsy sex.

- He definitely throws you over his shoulder and carries you off to bed when it’s obvious that you’re willing to get down and dirty.

- Threesomes with Billy; though your boyfriend might get a little jealous from time to time if you pay more attention to his crush friend.

- He’s probably turned on by intelligence. He doesn’t even like half of the shit you talk about but the fact that you’ve memorized it and can explain it to him like you came up with it leaves him hot and bothered.

- He kinda likes when you get loud on him. It really boosts his ego.

- Shout out to your tits because they are never going to be left alone when he’s around you. And shout out to you because half the time he pays more attention to them than whatever you’re trying to say.

- Every time you do anything even mildly related to what you may or may not do in the bedroom; like putting your hair up in a ponytail, earns you a shit eating grin; as though he’s going to get action in the middle of you doing your homework. Sometimes you’ll do said things just to “be cruel” and prove a point.

- Stu comes from a pretty wealthy family and you cannot convince me that he’s never tried to momentarily become your sugar daddy. Like he’ll offer to get you something while grinning and saying “but you’ll have to do something for me”.

- Logistically speaking here, Stu has to have a big dick. I mean come on, look at him: he’s a lanky boy who’s over six foot tall. Even his tongue looks longer than normal.

- He tends to either just pull out or, if you prefer it, he’ll finish in your mouth. But condoms are obviously also an option; he might complain a little at first but he isn’t about to pass up sex because of a little latex.

- He’s such a sweetheart after the two of you finish. Aftercare is honestly probably more important to him than it is to you. He lives for all the cuddling and loving touches, and all the sweet nothings and praise that the two of you say to each other.

[oftenderweapons]

Dirty ABCs | Namjoon and Vixen

Pairing: Namjoon x Vixen (OC)

Wordcount: 2.1k

Genre: headcanons

Rating: 18+. Minors, do not interact.

This just me having a little bit of fun in between collabs and commissions with an NSFW alphabet, so I can also get to know my characters better (yes, they're just characters. Do not assume the boys like/dislike any of the things I mention). A new drabble should be out soon, but just in case you missed it, here's Jimin's post-Soowoozoo smut! Please, read the trigger warnings carefully 🥺💖

Here's my masterlist! enjoy!!!! 💜✨

Trigger warnings: cumshots, cumeating, creampie, marking, unprotected sex, switch!vixen, switch!joon, daddy!joon, DDLG, lapdance, stripping, masturbation, voyeurism, exhibitionism, roleplay, homework within a professorxstudent roleplay, positions (doggy, missionary, reverse cowgirl, bend over), intimacy kink (?), bondage (hands tied, gags), impact play, oral sex, oral fixation, biting, casual mention of foot fetish, food play, choking kink, erotic massage, jealousy (kink), sapiosexuality, size kink, mention of infidelity and sharing partners, mention of outdoor sex, sex toys (dildo, vibrator, manacles, cockring, paddle, buttplug), edging, orgasm denial, orgasm control, overstimulation, BDSM club, uhm...bicuriosity ig?, thickdick!Namjoon, bubblebutt!Vixen impressive sex drive (?)

Aftercare: Namjoon is the kind of guy who’d gladly collapse in bed after some good, nasty fucking. He puts plenty of energy in it and he isn’t content until he’s barely alive before calling it a night. Yes, both him and Vixen need to force the other into heading to the bathroom and cleaning up before falling asleep. When he goes especially hard on her, aftercare becomes a way to relax for both of them: he needs to pamper her to even things out, and she in return likes spoiling him, giving him cuddles, letting him fall asleep with his head on her chest while she strokes his hair. Yes, his favourite cuddle is her touching his hair and chatting about how they felt during sex.

Body part: He most definitely has a thing for legs, hips and ass. Vixen is all about his chest and arms — but, truth is she’s absolutely crazy about his neck.

Cum: He either cums inside or on Vixen’s ass. No other alternatives for him. He hates cumming in her mouth, mostly because her cunt is soooo much better to him; and then again, that means he can eat her out right after — or mark her up and shove his cum back inside. Vixen is a fan of him cumming inside, she’s pretty much traditional about this.

Dirty secret: Namjoon loves when Vixen doms him. He’d never admit that out loud but he’s praying for her to tie him up and strip for him before performing a lapdance and fucking herself with that glass dildo he bought her… He’ll just wait… hopefully… Vixen wants Namjoon to give her homework on some impossible topic and then punish her for every mistake she makes while he’s dressed in a suit and glasses.

Experience: We know all about Joon’s and Vixen’s bodycount. Joon had four, possibly five partners, one of which broke his heart. He wasn’t entirely vanilla with them, but Vixen is most definitely the spiciest he’s been with — and the most rewarding. Vixen had two partners before Namjoon and her first boyfriend was way more experienced than Namjoon is, but that is not an issue to her. She knows if she ever asked him, they could try out pretty much anything.

Favourite position: Namjoon is mostly about doggy and missionary. Doggy for enthusiastic fucking with that teenage eagerness that characterises them both. Missionary when he needs to make love to her slow and steady — though he admits Vixen on top of him in reverse cowgirl is also a hot topic for him. Vixen likes good old missionary since she likes Namjoon’s body shielding hers. She also enjoys bending over for him — especially on the back of the sofa.

Goofy: neither of them is that goofy when it comes to sex. For them is a moment to get rid of tension and gain more intimacy. It’s a moment of communication and connection, and a very spiritual one at that. There might be little giggles and laughs here and there when they’re in a playful mood, but even then they’re more happy than goofy.

Hair: Namjoon trims his hair slightly, just to keep things neat and tidy. Vixen used to shave at the beginning of their relationship. She waxed a few times, to try something different and to feel Namjoon’s tongue better when he goes down on her. She switched to trimming when she found out Namjoon enjoyed a more natural look.

Intimacy: Nothing isn’t intimate between these two. Brushing their teeth together before going to bed? Religion. Getting dinner ready? A ritual. Making love? Therapy. Fucking like gorillas? Relief. These two share one single soul. They’re each other’s temple, and their bedroom is their church.

Jack off: These two? Masturbation galore. They’re the literal proof that being in a relationship should never stop you from taking care of yourself. They masturbate together while they watch porn, they masturbate to the sight of the other one doing it or just watching them. Namjoon is a huge fan of watching Vixen touch herself. He can do it with his hands tied, untied, or stroking his cock. He really doesn’t care as long as he can watch. Plus the fact that the wall dividing his bedroom from the shower is made of glass really gives him the best view when he has morning wood and Vixen is washing herself. And that goes both ways. She likes watching him while she showers, putting on a bit of a show. Vixen also likes watching Namjoon masturbate, though she prefers putting her hands on him. And Namjoon prefers her hands to his own, especially since she’s so fucking good at that.

Kink: We all know these two are the resident DDLG freaks. Other than that Namjoon suffers from a pretty severe case of voyeurism. On the side, all giving, we have oral fixation, impact play, marking, biting, cumplay and cumeating, and a very mild, very experimental foot fetish. He’s also into roleplay, especially regarding school/university environments. To that, we need to add on Vixen’s end exhibitionism and food play, and then, all giving, choking kink, exhibitionism, bondage and gags, erotic massage.

Location: these two need someplace private, since they can’t get in the mood unless they’re 200% sure they can take their time and relax and be as loud as possible. Namjoon would never stand the idea of them getting caught: he needs to protect Vixen. And Vixen would never try something in public. She knows he’d be too focused on the possible dangers to properly enjoy the experience. That doesn’t mean that they don’t tease each other in public. Vixen likes when they talk dirty in public so once they get home Namjoon rips her clothes off her.

Motivation: Namjoon gets turned on whenever Vixen looks incredibly refined and elegant, completely out of his league. Pair that up with someone flirting with her and he goes out of his way to remind her why she got his ring on her finger ten months after they first met. He also gets hot under the collar when he’s reminded of how fucking smart she is; that makes him both proud and horny. On a baser level, she just needs to grind against his thigh, rub her ass on his crotch, kiss his neck or suck his fingers to make him instantly hard. Vixen gets horny very easily when she sees him exercise power — which happens pretty often with him being the leader. Also watching him tower over someone who isn’t her makes her a little volatile — that’s her daddy, he’s her protector.

No: easy. Sharing. Even simply her moans being overheard by someone would make him nervous. Once he used to share everything about his sex life with his friends, but after he and Vixen got engaged, everything involving her without clothes on became a 100% restricted topic. He still happens to talk about sex with his friends, but he must be in need of desperate help in order to share details. Vixen agrees on sharing being a hard no. She also thinks doing stuff in public is absolutely a hard no: she’s far too attached to her job to risk a scandal ruining it. And of course she would never stand Namjoon’s career and reputation going downhill.

Oral: Both fans, Namjoon both on the giving and receiving side, though he prefers giving by far. Vixen is also a fan of receiving. If Namjoon weren’t so damn intimidating, she would enjoy giving more, too.

Pace: depends on the mood. Playful or angry? Then he’s fucking her like she’s nothing but a cocksleeve, straight up jackhammering his way in. Loving and emotional? Then they’re going slow and steady so they can feel every inch of their flesh meeting and parting and squeezing and squelching and sliding.

Quickie: yes, but not excessively. Vixen can only consider a quickie as a form of foreplay. There’s no way to satisfy her unless at least two rounds are involved. Namjoon is more than happy to take his time with her. If they don’t have that much time, they prefer masturbating together — quick, efficient, delectable.

Risk: No? The only risk he would take would be fucking her out in the open, but someplace where the possibility of getting caught is lower than 0.1%. He’d book super secluded villas for their holidays and fuck her until she’s begging him to give her a break.

Stamina: Namjoon hasn’t got too much stamina and Vixen doesn’t either, they just deprive and tease each other when they want to make it super special, otherwise they would be lazy and take naps in between a round and another. And they can truly deal with that brilliantly since they are great at foreplay and that makes up for their rather weak stamina.

Toy: These two are shameless about their toys. Vixen has a thing for dildos, and Namjoon loves spoiling her with those. She has a couple vibrators too, but she’s not that much of a fan: she has a practical one, when she needs things done quick and easy and another one that looked way too cute for her not to have it. In addition to that, they have manacles, a cockring, a paddle and a quite interesting plug.

Unfair: Being with Namjoon is all about the pleasure. He’d much rather overstimulate Vixen rather than deny her. Also because he has very poor control over his instincts and he can’t deny himself. He would tease, edge or deny Vixen only to punish her and make sure that she actually reads that as a punishment and not as some sick way for her to get exactly what she wants (aka spanks). Vixen is more on the teasing side, and she enjoys controlling Namjoon’s orgasms, but she’s very fair. They like to play dirty, but they make sure everyone gets what they need.

Volume: Namjoon is all about low and deep. His moans, groans, growls and grunts all come in a very quiet, although very eloquent way. He prefers keeping it quiet so it feels more intimate. Vixen on the other hand is very vocal, especially when Namjoon goes down on her or is trying to overstimulate her. She’s still considerate about the people living next door, but at the same time, she has a thing for doing it in the studio so she can be as loud as she wants, much to Namjoon’s — and his private tracks’ — chagrin.

Wild card: if it weren’t for his jealousy and his position, Namjoon would love to fuck Vixen in a room full of strangers, just to show how good he can make her feel, and to enjoy just how deranged she would get once adrenaline started kicking in. Claiming her in a semi-public context would help him sate his possessiveness for a good while. Vixen instead would love to go to a BDSM club with Namjoon and watch scenes from other people — maybe, potentially, join? — she most definitely wishes she had done stuff with a girl before getting with Namjoon.

X-Ray: Namjoon is packed. Length is not exceedingly more than average. But match that with more than impressive girth? That’s a wild ride. It most definitely takes a stretch. Vixen has rather small boobs — but she’s more than stubborn to make up with a full, round bubble butt.

Yearning: at the beginning they go pretty wild. Vixen is used to getting at least an orgasm before falling asleep — every night. Of course that tones down once she gets with Namjoon, especially since she learns to prefer quality over quantity and he refuses to get stuff done in ten minutes. She easily slips into a two to three times a week regimen, but deprive her for longer than ten days and she’ll feel neglected. Of course she’d take care of herself, but that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t start drifting away as she’d feel emotionally neglected too. Namjoon considers himself happy as long as he can have a full weekend of fucking: he tends to cram all the sex in days where he can relax since during the week he’s often too tense to initiate anything sexual. But he wouldn’t deny it if the fancy struck him.

Zzz: He falls asleep like a bear. He goes positively lethargic the moment he hits the bed after cleaning up. Vixen finds it extremely endearing. She usually takes longer, but not too much. She likes cuddling him while he’s sleeping.

[problematicpervertpod]

recs on recs on recs

Yaoi/Manga I’m reading/have read. Please support the artists on official websites. If you have recs or want to chat about any of these get in my messages right the fuck now my dudes. Also spoilers, also this probably doesn’t make sense to anyone but me, also I think I’m funny sorry in advance.

Dangerous Convenience Store

Tags: Ongoing, self aware lead for the most part, gangs, smut, love triangle, possessive, not rapey, seme is like the fucking hulk compared to uke, college, age gap, good art, muscular bodies, seme is adorable/romantic in sp chapters, sexual awakening, meeting the gang (in two ways!), FAINTS OF CUTENESS/HOTNESS, the memes after every chapter got me gagged, HAHE hahahahahahahahahaha, OMG DO I GET SOME CNC?! (update: short lived), we stan a vocal man (Ahjussi), thigh fucking, my mans be like my thighs hurt fuck my ass instead DECEASED, ass smacking, these memes are so good god damnit, rimming

8/10, I live for Ahjussi (Am I spelling this wrong..)

The New Employee 

-love love love

Tags: ongoing, we stan supportive boyfriends, healthy relationship, boss/employee, smut, office setting, good art, 10/10 will re-read, muscular bodies

Love Shuttle

Tags: completed, ABO, enemies to lovers, possessive, coworkers, fake relationship, strong omega, the art sucks but I like the story, art gets better after the 1st season, alphas eyes change colors when happy/anxious, muscular bodies, 7/10, update 10/10 art is meh but fml this storyline is basic af in the best way and it’s the fluff/smut I need, when you’re caught by the folks *cringe*

Hold Me Tight

Tags: ongoing, boss/employee, bodyguard, gio can’t feel heat until felix comes along, uke is strong af, horny bastards, smut, possessive, tragic childhood, moving in together right away, rich seme, felix in a bunny costume though *heart eyes*, dialogue is great, rape in a technical sense but the vibe is written like both characters are all good after? Ex. hospital scene…dub con, ART IS GREAT, hand holding during sex, 10/10 will re-read, muscular bodies

Yours to Claim 

Tags: ongoing, love triangle, Dom/sub dynamics, smut, main is big switch energy, reincarnation, jealousy, manipulative, possessive, self aware lead for the most part, toxic af, GREAT ART, college, rich semes, 10/10 will re-read and not even finished, SONOFABITCH that cliff hanger!! Season 3 come thruuuu (I have to wait until November? *cries* BUT MAH LOVE TRIANGLE!!, I want a THROUPLE GOD DAMN IT

The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Tags: obsessed with this story, will the incense burner scenes make it?? No tags because I'll never forget this one haha wangxian 5ever, send me all fanfics/fan art you have about this story, love Dark Wangji, Jadecest, ABO/omegaverse, Bottom Wangji/Top Wei Ying, and honestly anything regarding this fandom

Bj Alex

Tags: completed, great art, 11/10 will re-read, cam boy, fanboy, seme is an asshole, uke is so sexy, jealously, rich seme, enemies to lovers kind of?, CHANWOO IS MY BOY FOR LIFE, Chanwoo MD supremacy, BDSM (like really really), fuck I love Chanwoo, college students, rich seme, emotional rollercoaster, uke soft body, mean seme, college life, that one nosy bitch ass guy trying to expose my boys needs to fuck right off, seme split/fake personality, dub con 

Anti PT

Tags: ongoing, 11/10 re-readable, porn with feelings, love triangle, jealousy, attempted non-con, personal training wink wink, main love interest is actually the best, second male lead is a god damn creep, first time, smut, great art, sex addict/constantly horny uke, I WANT A HWI, 

Related: https://www.anime-planet.com/manga/anti-pt/recommendations 

Payback

Tags: ongoing, both are psychopaths tbh, revenge, gangs, uke sells himself to seme, violent seme, entertainment industry, brunette supremacy, what this motherfucker gonna do? hehe , great art, muscular bodies, dead dove do not eat, my mans must be GOOD looking/animal magnetism cause everyone losing their fucking minds, okay this is a comedy I’m dying, he tried to scare him with wanting to be a top but my psycho said REVERSEUNO BITCH I’M A VERSE (wait jk apparently *sigh*), anonymous masked sex (sad n’ kinky)

My Suha

Tags: ongoing, wow this gets dark, possessive af like holy shit, terrible people all around uke, rape, boss/employee, office politics/family politics, smut, characters that are punchable, dead dove do not eat, *velociraptor noises*, avoided this for a while but I’m back because nothing can be more emotionally devastating than Banana Fish, TIE HIM UP, FUCK HIS FACE ALKSJD:ASKD, FUCK SUHA UR SO HOT that dirty talk though YAS, glad I picked this back up lmao, GOD DAMN IT just when the package arrived then this red head fucker *screams*

Shame Application aka Dirty Vibration

Tags: completed, friends to lovers, model seme, cute af uke, love triangle, entertainment industry, smut, kink, all kinds of sex everywhere, realized feelings, mutual pining, jealousy, rich seme, blonde seme, big brother 1984 always watching, 10/10 would re-read, porn with plot, they were roommates!, ~straight~ seme, first times, great art, remembering some cringe but considering the story it’s par for the course

Will You Subscribe

Tags: ongoing, season 1 completed, enemies to lovers, cam boy, office politics, boss/employee, hiding a secret, public sex, stalkers/creepy men, emotionally stunted characters, mutual pining, idiots in lust, lingerie company, slut shaming, jealousy/possessiveness, season 2 bebeh, HOLDING HANDS *velociraptor noises*, LMAO okay my mans is not THAT old how tf does he not know netflix and chill, BUNNY COSTUME (quickly becoming my new fav trope in manga, A+ gang), oh we stan a good boy, wtf is wrong with wanting to do cam work, ‘I wish my marks could become permanent’ *omegaverse wink*, *works for lingerie company* *doesn’t understand where bf gets sexy costumes* like wut kind of fuckery…, cross dressing ftw, roleplay, classic BL miscommunication trope

Hyperventilation

Tags: completed, high school crush, unrequited love, mutual pining, smut, quickie (short story), class reunion, apparently furry with the extra chapter turning my man into a bunny but c'est la vie! https://myreadingmanga.info/korean-bl-animation-hyperventilation-engsub/ this is the animation of the same story, different endings but same in tone (this site is spammy AF but the English subs are so hard to find for this) 8/10 

Unmei no tsugai ga omae da nante

Tags: only one bed, ABO, office setting. Coworkers, enemies to lovers, competitive, equality in the omegaverse, dubcon, real dicks and not lightsabers, fated pair, art is cute af 8/10

K’s Secret

Tags: buckle up buttercup, dead dove do not eat, angst, pining, somnophilia, dub con, non con, boss/employee, manipulative, stalking, forced relationship, tragic childhood background, weird art but gets better,  uke: don’t threaten me with a good time but seriously stop threatening me, possessive & obsessive, seme is like the fucking hulk compared to uke, wow were going full psycho stalker hm?, dating a narcissist is all fun and (mind)games, con non con… ? honestly who tf knows, domestic!, OW MY HEART, the t/n WAP note sent me, ch 51 translated by gen z, do special ep= furry? Wait there’s a maid costume, bunny costume, directors friends keeping it real, rough translations 8/10

Enthusiasm

Tags: ongoing, dead dove do not eat, uke buys seme, masc boys, muscular bodies, fight club, master/slave, rich uke, revenge, real dicks not lightsabers, rough sex, cuckholding, daddy issues, suicide, wow the end of ch 5 punched a hole in my heart, penile implant life,  rough translations makes the storyline wonky, nvm back to lightsabers *star wars noises*, HAD ME FEELING SOME TYPE OF WAY I CAN NOT, shibari, possessive, wait this is cute *velociraptor noises*, angst, no kithes for you “bestie”, OBSESSED, honestly choke him pupper, STAY THE NIGHT ALKSDJA:SLDKJAS:LKDJA:SLDKj, problematic but I’m riding for these two, 

Ichimai Goshi Fetish

Tags: completed, short, fetishes DO start in childhood don’t they *ruminates*, author: describes ML as a beautiful 2D character meanwhile: ML IS 2D character, fellas is it gay to kiss the homies?, “real dudes don’t interest me” is a MOOD, comedy, jealousy, college setting, dialogue is A+, not lightsabers but not dicks either, first time, when you’re fucked so good you think you’ve died, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4uEq5Nx6ko, hero/villain roleplay. Fluff n smut 10/10

My Purrfect Boss

Tags: completed, tooth rotting fluff because blondie is so FUCKING cute little sensitive soul, golden retriever boyfriend, pure comedy, DECEASED, MY MAN JUST DID THE SLOW BLINK, office setting, boss/employee, ~wasted~ (red dead redemption meme),  FFS SO CUTE, he put a ring on it right away beyonce would be proud af, he protecc he attack but most importantly he hit it from the back, jealousy, honeymoon phase of dating, the ex is a snake (update: oh wow literally), I’m picking up abuse/PTSD vibes based on how Kang reacts to his ex :(, classic BL miscommunication plot, immediately no meme audio (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6XWSGfYnps) ,  I WILL STRAIGHT UP MURDER CHA WTF!!!!!!, gang rape, spiked with drugs that force heat, me rn:*screaming/rage*, psychotic ex/abuser, HE PROTECCC, actual relief after that scene jesus fuck, okay YES kings I see you, okay this is giving me cuteness aggression, hi yes I’d like to adopt a cat and a dog please 9/10

Following Namsoo to the Bathhouse

Tags: completed, same author as, “My Purrfect Boss”, A+ comedy once again, JUNIOR, gay awakening, “fap myself to death” DEAD, facial expressions are ridic, my minds telling me no but my body, my bodyyyy’s telling me yaaaaa, ya boy is literally losing his mind over this, actual lightsabers lmao, FLUFF, permasmile, 6969, THINKS THEY’RE GOING TO EAT RAMEN, dense gay, own your skin wtf okay hannibal calm down, everyone is officially cray,  ah I also am barfy when drunk, denial really is something hm, classic BL miscommunication plot, when people pleasing too far, happy ending 🥺🥰, side story: our crazy gets his very own crazy (ashton Kutcher from spread vibes), public sex, sex sparkle 9/10

Alien in my Closet

Tags: ongoing (maybe completed but def ongoing on the site I use), not rapey at all?? You’d think it’s impossible in this medium ffs, anti pt vibes, cute art, fluff ‘n smut, red head!!, they were roomates!, sex toys, bsdm, D/s (brat)dynamic or maybe owner/pet, bondage, *tiffany hadish voice* this is noiceeee, con humiliation/degradtion, SANTA CLAUS, edging, marking, one lotus please (he’s clearly read the 4 agreements and karma sutra), con non con, exhibitionism, the wrist thing stays on people, Katoptronophilia,  roleplay, is it stalking when you bring your friends?, lotus: welcome home cheater, the chin on the head thing gives me cuteness aggression, the twins are my favs, when ur crush vanilla af 😭, haesung: experiment on me daddy, no dick until halfway through/fingering supremacy, bedroom sessions has me gagged, voyeurism, wait they haven’t kissed this whole time I forgot (audio: https://www.tiktok.com/@ryley/video/6976701880277748997?lang=en), sunbae is sus, YES FINALLY A FUCKING SWITCH COUPLE AKJSDHALKSJDHASKLJDHALS KJDALKSJD (update: sort of), there’s a missed opportunity for an anal probe joke, damn it okay maybe sunbae is chill, 3 musketeers, my heart*implodes*, *velociraptor noises*, 12/10 would re-read such fluff my heart 

On Doorstep

Tags: completed, age gap, reese has ptsd, jimmy going from 0 to 100, jimmy really got down on his knees at work, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) deepest part you say, real dicks, ride him like a rodeo, quickie/short story, porn with plot

Gorani Jeon

Tags: ongoing, omegaverse, no alpha though, animal hybrid, art is beautiful like it's drawn on paper not a screen, 40 inch weave yours came in a pack, historical (non-modern), lord send me a sexy man pls, the memes after each chapter are golden, taking the phrase licking wounds literally, is that an eggplant or are you just happy to see me hehe, ahhh so inhibitors do exist here, vertical 69, here lays Bau fucked to death by Ran, WHY HE TOUCHING MY MAN, these chickens are dope, stomp on his dick, that’s what I call a happy meal, fucked right out the front door I’M DEAD, mpreg, i need a tiger+mountain god spin off (whoops dad/son my bad), slice of life, cute fluff 8/10

Room to room

Tags: completed, college setting, A+ dialogue, absurd size difference, unrequited love,  sexsomina, dubcon, angst, death by a thousand cuts emotionally, insecurity, body envy, pining, friends to lovers, they were roommates!, homophobia, sexual assault, PTSD, gays in denial, the tattoo 🥺 ow my heart, truly this is 90% smut, “going from unrequited love to fwbs is shittier than I expected”, dowan *bad blood by t swift* when he sees garam, ch 22garam reminds me of my ex and that’s not a compliment, I’m not gay but my boyfriend is vibes, triflers need not apply, spanking, 😭😭😭😭😭 my heart hurts, is anyone getting a bit of a puppy play vibe? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vni9ZWmDXis, handcuffs, lots of head we stan, dowan’s gotta a touch of a foot thing or maybe body worship thing, asdlfgkjs ;dlkfgjsd;flkgj;sdflkgj;sdlfgjs;d/gkdf SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEE, roleplay. They broke the bed no use of crying over spilled milk ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), side stories delivering man in uniform and sex toys AND puppy, asdlkjaslfkasdjfl;askdfjasdf the shirt thing is so hot, watersports, I take it back this is 98% smut 9/10

Mistake Lover

Tags: completed, when ur bff is back on their BS, love triangle, coworkers, i swear all these ukes look the same to me at this point (which is very cute), GE!!!! (wangxian flashbacks), wait no smut?.... Paused

Yagi to ookami no hatsujou jijou

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, literally on my reading list because a comment said “nice cock 10/10”hahahaha, animal hybrids, scifi/aliens, me during chapter one: am I a furry? No. Am I? Relevant audio https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noJNIqvDfoo, hotties when human GOD DAMN, bi king, okay I stan this girl changing gears take your opportunities honey!, does blondie have a tinder or how is this happening? (update: called it), feminization, dubcon/noncon, marking, heats, idk about 10/10 cock but not lightsabers, translation is ruff (get it?), a yankee hahaha, literal wound licking, googles chimera, *claps* yes king selfish call his ass out, tail holding caaaayoooot, not that isn’t usually copious amounts of cum but really this is a lot 8/10

Make Me Bark

Tags: completed, $250 a month rent?? *cries in Californian*, god damn it these grey haired 2D men are really hot fml, “next months rent is a looming concern but I hope it’ll get better” followed by apartment on fire is how I feel about reality, rare characters that smile way more than they frown, sex toys, kink, puppy play, owner/pet dynamic, sugar daddy/baby, college setting, harness, muzzle, leash, tail plug, shirt thing!!, soaked briefs, playing barbie IRL, omg meet cute at the adult store, intercrural sex, possessive/jealousy, ah fuck yes I saw this panel on IG but it didn’t have the source but now hehe, whipping, choking, spanking, *bookmarks*, simp city, childhood friends, side couple cute af, yeonsoo: sorry I’m an anti romantic, size queen, mens lingerie, domestic, mutual pining,  these bestie pairings are *chefs kiss*, skinny but muscular bodies/no ridiculous size differences, “does he have a big dick?” “probably” “well tell him to come” GAGGED AJKSDHALSKDJHA this dialogue pure comedy, exhibitionism, human auction, maid costume, men in heels, topping in a dress, girl at the bus stop HAHAHA, ffs this is so cute, side stories: it’s a small world afterall, dynamic role reversal, pink haired boy is guru, SCREAMING AKDJA:SLDKJA:LKDJA:LSDKJLAKDJA:LDJAL:SKDJASLKDJA:SLKDJLAKSDJLASDJ:LASJD:ALSKDJASL:DJ:ASLJDPUTARINGONIT!!!! 11/10 

Gurume no fukurami

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, food fetish, feeding fetish, age gap, throuple-eqsue? There’s 3 people involved, paused ch 1 pg 30

Under the Green Light

Tags: ongoing, thank you IG for rec’ing this, brunette supremacy, neurodivergent?, lmao @hag, this statue is everything I wonder if it’s based on a real piece?, we went from talking art to being pinned to the ground REAL quick, translations rough but not as rough as my mans here, draw me like one of your french girls vibe, sass master, these dicks are ridiculously huge which is saying something for this genre, i love a verse/switch, “first time he’s asked someone to stop so his self-esteem is hurt” HAHAHAHA, stealing bae’s shirt, facials galore, car sex/public sex, jin not into praise kink clearly, sort of slut shaming jealousy, marking

Walk on Water

Tags: completed, for being about porn it’s not that smutty (i take it back), “don’t even think about running away” got me like https://giphy.com/gifs/VABbCpX94WCfS, actual dicks (lightsabers later must be the cleaners not the OG), muscular bodies, blonde seme, brunette uke, k mcqueen is everything, honestly haven’t loved a couple this much since chanwoo x MD and I LOVE THEM, jealousy, orgasm denial, the angles/frames of the art in this are insane (11/10), emotional intimacy CUTENESS HASIHDLASKDHJLAKSJDH, i wanna lick lick lick you from your head to your toes, dirty talk A+, bestie you turned out to be Judas you judgy fuck how dare you touch my man, Ryan is 50 shades of fucked up bb needs therapy, Chang and yeowoons sexual tension is *chefs kiss*, I ship it/all my ships sailing, woof non con but expected tbh, YEAH BABY YEAH *Austin powers voice*, fml I don’t want this story to end, meeting the Hets ™ would make me nervous too, spiderman kith, mirror sex sjkadfhasldjkfh, 34+35, JOI but with a partner? Not D/s, promises are made to broken hehe, that feeling when you understand the title, omg the fan art is so cool!! 15/10 would re-read seriously I can’t explain how well the artist used angles/how she portrayed the scenes was fucking MASTERFUL

Woof Wolf

Tags: that's my best friend (saweetie), red heads, werewolf au, college setting, students, shoot a shot in your mouth while I'm riding, facials, marking

Sexual Awakening of an Ex Delinquent 

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, sexual coercion/non con/dub con, tiddies, bondage, nipple play, edging/orgasm denial, candy in ass wow, food kink, kink in general, rich seme working class uke, lightsabers,  big dick Jesus fuck, exhibitionism, public sex, men's lingerie, Blondie is a sweet baby angel, self hatred/homophobia, sexual narrating that has me like oof 😣 that's not how this works but okay, the sweet spots thing is a great line, man is a slave to the sweets, lmao at the meme at the end of ch 9 fucking facts, kidnapping plot, rapey guys all around this story, tattoo/back story reveal has me like *nods head yes*, my throats broken has me gagged, crazy amount of sfx noises that distract from the art (I really appreciate cleaners I realize), first times, rushed ending feels,  would rate 6/10 not terrible but probably won't read again.  

With Your Tail Yes

Tags: ongoing, IG rec, quickie/short story, on man brunette looks EXACTLY like a different character by another artist like for real duplicate, home boy pulled Elle Wood’s Bend n Snap and we are HERE FOR IT, lingerie/cross dressing, okay compilation of short stories, great artwork but wtf these are far too short (maybe uploaded wrong..?), *immediately makes deal with the devil because yum*, ah okay previews THEN stories, human animal hybrid situation, lightsabers, fucking imagine your crush delivery the sex toy you ordered online HAHA *dies*, buys toys because men ain’t shit is a VIBE, you know he’s always wearing matching sets because he’s 100% that bitch, dub con/non con, knotting (unexpected), exhibitionism, public sex, good ol’ fashion blackmail to get your lover to stay with you trope, sexual assault/attempted rape, victim blaming, shibari, leashes, D/brat dynamic sort of, copious amounts of cum, lube? What lube?, marathon sex, first time, 75 hours?? Immediately no meme, 7/10 mostly for art/concepts but not execution

Heat and Run

Tags: ongoing, IG rec, omegaverse, friends to enemies to lovers, multiple couples as main to sides then sides to mains, my heart dropped because I thought the first sex scene was incest but then realized I’m mixing up all the characters derp, dense gays, this is america (the shooting comment WOOF reality feels bad man), blondes have more fun, real dicks, dubcon/CNC dealers choice, mutual pining, idiots in love, big alpha energy BDE, there are moments I feel Hayoung on a spiritual level and not sure that’s a compliment hahaha, orgasm denial/edging, istg if he bonded without Hayoung permission *jenna marbles BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII YOU BETTAH NOT*, also I was hoping the idol was him but realizing it’s probs his sis, *deep sigh*, BDIRL, wow racism, oh no oh no no no no no meme audio, listen everyone needs to get into therapy to break that generational trauma is all I’m saying (not excusing abuse at all, trauma isn’t a free pass), NO ONE WANTS TO PLAY A GAME WITHOUT KNOWING THE RULES :ALKSDHJALKSDJA:SLKDJTRUE, matthew singing bo burnham: I’m problematic *background singers ‘he’s a problem!’*, i ship it yolo, JAEHO STAN (no means no!), mpreg, god damn it I am so worried about him getting roofie and the party scene hasn’t even started ABO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TOO ME, OH THANK JAEHO, dayummmm that clapback was real fuck him UP, me clapping: MARK HIM MARK HIM, GOD DAMN IT WITH THESE ONGOING FUCKING CLIFF HANGERS FML, marked via knotting? Okay that’s new, but also like normal marking I think, fucking til bottom pees trope

Heaven Officials Blessing

Animated series season 1 complete. Live action currently filming (same director as Untamed too UGH SO HAPPY)

Tags: ongoing, same author as my fav ever MDZS, just finished season 1 animated on netflix and can no longer avoid this because I LOVE THEM, all the memes on IG make sense now, Prince voice: Dearly Beloved (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXJhDltzYVQ) we are gathered here today to dive deeper into a fandom I will never escape, ART IS AMAZING (https://tenor.com/view/incredible-talented-lady-brilliant-gaga-gif-14857187), group chats are always chaotic tbh, wait a minute meme audio: bride = bottom? How tf did I not get that the first time round *sigh* always hoping for a verse couple, the asst. Boys I ship hard, the sass, fuck this is going to just be pure angst isn’t it *straps in, has fluffy manga queued*, even if no smut 11/10 gege porn, not subtle, god FUCK this ART IS SO FUCKING GOOD THE TALENT skjas;ldkfja;, 🥺, traumatic cliff moment *mdzs flashbacks*, HC smirk is my new favorite thing, no fucking but lots of touching, size difference, horror, gore, wuxia, great side characters, my ear feels tingly too lmao, SOMEONE BETTER GET THESE MF SNAKES ON THIS MF PLANE (cliff), umbrella moments got me uwu, gimme at least didi pleaseandthankyou, FUCK I LOVE THIS ARTIST she keeping us WELL fed with these extras DAYUM, wind/earth master ship please sail, CALL ME DADDY IM DEAD, HC has LWJ energy like you are not qualified to talk to me LOL, WAIT this totally counts as there was only one bed trope, also I’m already excited about omegaverse ff (send me recs please please please)

4 week lovers

Tags: ongoing because apparently I want to torture myself, mutual pining/”unrequited love”, college life, friends to lovers, blackmail ur crush into sex trope, public sex, I was going to tag possessive body language but possessive in a general sense apparently (starting strong yessss), sure jan @unrequited love dialogue, THEY WERE ROOMMATES *cackles*, sus haha, rough translation, pure comedy, shirt thing!, casual abuse :( (back story, traumatic childhood), I’m getting TharnType vibes (but not quite…), that note is precious, cry during/after sex, great angles, dialogue A+ 

Burlesque Night

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, stripper/body guard, coworkers, lust at first sight, magic mike vibes, fridays = getting fucked on stage O-O, well that was traumatizing af, took a bullet, real dicks, LDR, CUTE, I’m not in love with you… sure jan, OH WOW MASTER dlksaj;alsdkja;lsdkja;sld, gay awakening/first time, the art detail is *chefs kiss*, disappointed but not surprised :( :( :(, we stan a yes and lover, shirt thing, still not sure wtf the vertical anus thing is but full circle moment haha, you know what fuck it I’d re-read this 9/10

My one and only cat

Tags: ongoing, cat hybrids, god damn it I’m totally in furrydom ffs, ah well here we go, idol hot = loneliness wahhh /s, so hot he literally transforms other beings, omg a cat cafe CUTE, fuck that cat is cute *so fluffy*, stalker status, comedy, real dicks, I think the uncle would be supportive/jealous even I hope they talk about it I’m dying to know his thoughts, big tiddies, if this ain’t the cutest shit FLUFF/SMUT, copious amounts of cum, ate it with the panties on, CAKE, xmas, his milkshakes bring all the boy(cats) to the yard, trifling bitch

Imitation Mate

Tags: completed, omegaverse, alpha x alpha. Class rivals YAS, childhood frans, enemies to lovers omg this is all the shit I want, manipulation 1000 but yolo I ship it

Mr. 100% Perfect

Tags: ongoing, so relatable, OCD?, hoarder, when I read the title I thought mental illness and I was right, masks ugh RELATABLE, getting back together w ex, woof sibling drama/manipulation, suicide attempt, omg their communication regarding the psycho is REFRESHING, OMG JEJU ISLAND I see it in every fucking kdrama ever but this is the first time I’ve seen it mentioned in a manga *hm* interesting, furry furry everywhere, eye contact, finished reading season 1 pause for an omergaverse cause, okay I’m back and season 2 starting STRONG #1 men are gross #2 mans just went right to a blowie while mf was trying to pee lmao i can NOT the germs barf, fuckboi extraordinaire stressing over a textback is *great*, that istg face is perfect, HYUNGGGG, hand on his heart OW MY HEART, vibe check LOL, here for this plot dev, END OF SEASON2 NOOOOOOOimnotready. Head bonks CUTE

The origin of species

Tags: ongoing, omegaverse, sex tape, blackmail, i already don’t like this teacher, size difference, ‘JUST DIE’ hahahahahaha, I’m in love with noona, wait Ahjussi means uncle/mister? Dangerous convenience store has a new meaning to me now, DECEASED @they won’t, copious amounts of cum, alcohol to have intimacy *sighs in early 20s*, also WTF THEY ARE FUCKING AND THERE’S NO PHERMONE STUFF! What’s the point of being ABO without smell *swaggy p meme???*, wait okay ch 11 it begins, stockholm syndrome but since childhood I’m fairly certain *looking at you teacher I don’t trust these mfs*, dubcon obviously, also the can’t be knotted thing has me *cardi b meme that’s weird that’s sus* obvs poor bb about to get preg af, five word horror story: I won’t hurt you again *why tf you lyinggggg why u always lyinggg meme*, white collar crime, what’s the point of a contract when there’s no actual choice

How to Chase an Alpha

Tags: ongoing, lowkey been avoiding this one not because I think it’ll be bad I just..idk the brain is a weird thing, page 2 and I love mains attitude fucking gagged sass me bb, starting with rough translation but it be that way sometimes, GROUNDS HIMSELF BY TOUCHING HIS BLACK CARD I CANTTT, pheromone city fuck it UP, MC is a MOOD, mutual pining, when u and bae both hire PI’s to get info on each other, R-E-S-P-E-C-T, shirt thing, fucking chuffed about the rival fucking bring it, funny art, cheated on ugh mah heart I saw it coming and it still hurt, pure comedy this airport scene is so funny to me wtf, LDR, good ol murica fuckboi, LOVE HIM RIDE FOR UR MAN/MORALS, liams a little rapey rapist hm? No one’s ever said no… well being flooded with pheromones isn’t consent my dude, istg liam = I love it when they struggle, obvs jealousy/possessive tag but such is ABO, cat suit, BUNNY suit, sexy costumes, god damn it I love them that proposal/mpreg so cute, imprinting AW, ugh baes fam is so cute I needed that bc I wanna strangle wooyoungs dad, THE SECETARY is my fucking fav never stops being A+, SEC+LIAM?? Here for it *i ship it*, FUCK SO CUTE 12/10 re-read, fluff n smut, excited for how to chase an omegaside story hyung needs love!, JINI is mood, sales king I’m dying, that collar is ~hot~ btw

Egoism

Tags: completed (because jesus I can’t with ongoing, theheartbreakTM), UPDATE FML THE HEART BREAK IS REAL also no smut, omegaverse, hey stepbro, starts with rape, possessive/jealousy (isn’t all ABO?), age difference (6years, alpha is younger *can I get hyung plz lord*), HYUNG, woof this dad SUCKS, child abuse, rape culture *sigh*, I wanna get jacked like rick and summer and beat tf out of the dad, me n my cat, TELL EM HONEY I love this MC, traitor indeed, beta x omega btw, fated pair, coercive sex, didi going to be his own demise, BREAKUP/TIME SKIP NO this is BL hell, the rona is mentioned in this, ALL I WANT IS TO HEAR YOUR STORY WAHHHHHHHHHH also YES MY SHIP IS GOING TO SAIL I CAN FEEL IT, okay honestly frustrating a bit but also liked it yah 7-8/10, won’t re-read unless I’m looking for hurt though cause the comfort is BRIEF

Yarichin bitch bu

Tags: ongoing, reading because I watched this anime after seeing it mentioned in the comment section of -im-being-harassed-by-the-sexiest-man-of-the-year, anime was 2 eps a fucking wild the way this is uploaded SUCKS, no reality porn what plot rape-y ridiculous and now I need to read the source apparently haha, I need to know much more about yuri and blue hair guy ASAP (they have the spin off*adds to list*), high school setting, smut, studentsxstudents/teachers, photography club my ass, sex toys, kinky, crossdressing, gay awakening, unrequited love, jealousy, fake relationship, two faced people, OCD, COMEDY, rich people problems, hoarder, inferiority complex, one bed, toono is a dumbass in this love triangle or denial might be a better word, they are cousins my dude stop shipping it (I say to both toono and myself LOL), I wanna see Yuri’s face laksdjf;aldskf, vibrator #18 line is fucking iconic, yaguchi is about to get real interesting (BPD?), lies/manipulation, oh toono you sweet summer child, YURI i can’t wit chu, wait did he just punch the student because he won’t kiss him or???, dubcon/noncon obvs, finally my verse couple but they’re not a couple (yuri/tamu), they all care about each other is a weird way awwww, love confessions to pet vibrator scene are ICONIC MY DUDES I CAN NOTTT, lowkey living for Yuri’s drooling at this point, Jimi gives me such bad second hand embarrassment, Yuri the switch verse bb I’ve been looking for need more!, internalized homophobia, blackmail, MIDDLE FINGER IN THE AIR YAS KING, the heartbreak of ongoing/hasn’t been updated in years

Yarichin bitch bu dj wa

Tags: not completed I think, years old though, see above you know what it is, so cute omg, FIRST KISS AW, degradation kink?, MY VERSE COUPLE I’ve finally found you, biting, choking, rough sex, sex toys, they had fun together for another two hours DECEASED

Fucked by my Best Friend

Tags: ongoing, friends to lovers, body swap, Porn what plot, cannon threesomes in past maybe??(MFF for sure but MMF??), beach life, revenge, he became a HOT woman so honestly get over it, sloppy seconds, first off you’re both sluts second lmao this is going to be wild hm?, fellas is it gay if you kiss the homies, classic did you cum guy jfc, that’s how you get preg dumbass, ah the joys of being a woman /s assault in der clrub, *DEEP SIGH* @ you almost being raped turns me on, YES TURNING BACK DYING, gender has nothing to do with this LOL but true. Also yes cannon threesomes/orgies, googles frotting, mans like narrating playtime, intecurial sex public sex, lingerie, this is the closest thing to straight manga I’ve read hahaha, THE SCIENCE OMG FUCKING RIDIC :you need a mass amount of semen within you SURE JAN, possessive. Objectification, she trying to fuck without Shion LMAO, 34+35, do you think he’s on r/nofap, dry orgasm honestly impressed with mans rn ngl, spit as lube, anal fingering, just helping the homies find their prostate, bottom shaming (disappointed but not surprised), bis/gays in denial smh, question if he has a wet dream will he turn into a woman?, shirt thing, lol at female orgasm =anal in switcharoos mind, paging doc perv, shion is enjoying dressing up hm? Same dude, biggest reality gap is believing shion got admitted to a college HAHA, bad anatomy all over the place dude, rui is a dedicated exhibitionist, HE SO TIGHT BECAUSE THERES NO LUBE team no lube over here apparently not even a courtesy spit, yandere territory sort of?, Mayu with the dick wet comment is *chefs kiss*, THE HEARTBREAK OF ONGOING WAHHH I can’t believe I read all this but I can? 8/10 problematic possessive porn

[harringrovetrashrat]

Intercrurral prompt: Billy’s been harassing Steve all year, and it’s taking everything Steve has not to think bisexual thoughts about the guy he HATES. But one night, wrong place and wrong time, where they run into each other in the woods while Steve is on demodog patrol and Billy is escaping a bad run-in with Neil. Things boil over - the biggest imagery I have is Billy harshly whispering in Steve’s ear “Tell me you want this. TELL me you want ME.”

Okay, okay, okay

Here we GO.  Alright.  It took me a moment to find just the right way to do this, but I finally got it.

And it somehow ended up over 3k, whoooops. Let’s hope the read more actually works this time lol

TW for one use of the f-slur and misogynist language from Billy.

--

Steve ran a hand over his face as he stomped through the trees.  The cold February air bit at his skin, made his nose run.  Steve sniffed for what felt like the millionth time, still unable to stop the jittering in his bones.  He couldn’t go home.  Things felt too still, too quiet tonight.  Something was going to happen.  Steve could feel it.

He twirled the bat again, stretching out his fingers.  The trees were dark against the snow, the cloudless night allowing the moon to shine in through breaks in the trees.  Steve bit his lip, thinking about the day.  It sent a spike of warmth to his gut and he frowned, annoyed with himself.

It wasn’t much different than normal.  He spent the day tailing after Nancy and Jonathan, ignoring Tommy when he passed him in the hall, and trying to keep his dick to behave whenever Billy pressed up against him.  Or pushed him.  Or teased him.  Or fucking looked at him, jesus.  Steve had a problem and he really didn’t want to have it.  He’s looked at guys before, done stuff before, but of all fucking people, his dick had to be interested in Billy fucking Hargrove.

He’d prefer his dick be interested in Jonathan.

There was a snap from a few meters ahead in the trees and Steve froze, all thoughts exiting his brain.  His blood pumped through his veins and his pulse skyrocketed as he adjusted his grip on the bat.  He quietly made his way forward, looking through the brush for anything weird.  Anything slimy.  There were some dark spots on the ground that Steve followed, panic clawing its way into his chest.

“Fuck!” He heard someone hiss.  The sound came from in front of him and Steve relaxed minutely.  It wasn’t demodogs.

That didn’t mean there wasn’t still a threat.

Steve did his best to make sure his shoes didn’t crunch too much in the snow as he approached a clearing.  Someone was sitting on a log, hunched over on themselves, but they looked human enough.  There wasn’t any weird smell, nothing too obviously weird, so Steve lowered the bat.

“Hello?” The person on the log jumped, standing and whirling around, fists up and ready.  Bruised as well.  Which was why Steve wasn’t surprised to find himself looking at Billy Hargrove.

A messed up Billy Hargrove.

He had a black eye and a bloody nose, with what looked like a small cut at his hairline.  Steve kind of wished he hadn’t said anything.  Billy relaxed minutely, face scrunching into a sneer.

“Harrington?  What the fuck are you doing out here?  Mommy and Daddy playing house?” Steve ignored the sting, flaring his nostrils as he flexed his hand around the bat.  Billy’s eyes darted down before widening.  “What the fuck?” His voice lost it’s teasing edge, verging into actually scared.

“Oh,” Steve said, not wanting to drop the bat in case he needed it.  For whatever reason.  “Just-- On a walk.”

“On a walk?” Billy droned, unimpressed.  “Really?  Do you think I’m a fucking idiot?” Steve bristled and whatever was in the air that night pressed him forward, made him confrontational.

“Maybe,” he replied.  Billy tensed up, nostrils flaring as he grit his teeth.  “Smart people don’t come out here at night.” Billy barked out a mean laugh.

“S’Why you’re out here then, huh?” Steve stopped a few feet away, slinging the bat over his shoulder.  Now that he was closer, he could see that Billy’s cut was still bleeding.  Could see that his wounds were fresh.  That he was shaking.

“Seriously,” Steve said.  “The woods around here aren’t safe.”

“Safer than other places,” Billy grumbled angrily.  He looked up at Steve, eyes sharp.  “If they’re so unsafe, why are you out here for a walk?” Steve’s mind went blank as he grasped for a reason.

“I-- Well, I mean--”

“You out here meeting some fag lover?” Billy said, smile sharp and mean.  Steve clenched his fist, cheeks going ruddy.  Billy tilted his head, pushing his cheek out with his tongue.  Steve couldn’t help the way his eyes were drawn there.

“No,” he replied, stony.  “Honestly just out for a walk.”

“Really?  You and Creep Byers don’t meet up when Wheeler’s being too much of a bitch?” Steve gripped the bat tightly, scowling.

“Don’t call her that,” he snapped.  Billy snorted, hiding a grimace, and rolled his eyes.

“She left you, man,” he said.  “And you follow her and her new boyfriend around like a fucking lost dog.” Steve felt his cheeks heating up again, felt a blush creeping down his neck.

“Fuck you,” he said.  “It’s called having friends, ever heard of it?” Billy sneered, getting up into Steve’s space.  It made it a little hard to think, having him this close.  Close enough that Steve could see where Billy would freckle in the sun, how blue his eyes were, could fucking smell him.  He pushed the thoughts down, ignoring the heat in belly, just from having Billy close.  Stupid dick.

“You think you’re so above everyone, everything, don’t you?” Steve rolled his eyes, letting the bat fall to his side.  Billy wasn’t a threat, not really.  Not worthy of the bat at least.

“What’s your issue, man?” Steve asked.  Billy shoved him a little, making Steve take a step back.

“You’re my issue, Harrington,” he snapped.  “And I told you to fucking plant your feet.”

“What the fuck did I ever--”

“Your fucking existence fucking pisses me off!” Billy shoved him again, harder this time, and Steve let out a grunt, dropping the bat.  “You’ve got a fucking family that gives a shit, you’ve got fucking money, you’ve got fucking everything, and you--” Billy punctuated each reason with a shove, pushing until Steve was back up against a tree.  When he cut himself off, something flashed over his face.  Worry, fear, Steve wasn’t sure, but it was gone as soon as it was there.  “You, Harrington, just piss me off.”

“You don’t know shit about me, Hargrove,” Steve snapped, trying to push him off.  Billy pushed back, pinning him against the tree.  Steve let out a grunt, freezing up as Billy’s pressed up closer, getting into Steve’s face.  This was… dangerous.  Steve was already chubbing up in his pants and he swallowed thickly, giving some more frantic shoves to Billy’s shoulders.  “Fucking get off,” he said, voice high and pitchy.  Billy sneered, shoving Steve to the ground, standing above him.

“You’re such a fucking pussy,” he sneered.

“At least I’m not some fucking violent freak,” Steve said, sharp and cutting and cruel.  It’s what he wanted to be, in that moment.  Billy did that to him.  Brought out the King Steve who was mean, alone, and hurt.  And the words worked.  Billy snarled, jerking Steve up off the ground.  Steve grabbed at Billy’s hands, stumbling.

“Fuck you,” Billy hissed.  He gave Steve a shake, shoving him into another tree, slamming a hand next to his face.  Steve’s chest heaved with anxiety and, unfortunately, arousal.  He kind of had a thing for being manhandled.  At least, being manhandled by Billy.  The blonde pressed close, hurt shining in his eyes behind the fury.  It threw Steve for a bit of a loop.  “Fuck.  You.” Billy repeated, voice wobbling.  He pushed at Steve, pressing him up against the tree, before pausing.  His eyes widened and Steve flushed.  It was bound to happen, but Steve had held out some childish hope that Billy wouldn’t notice he’d been sporting a boner for a little while.  “What--”

“You’ve made your point--” Steve tried, tense as he tried to sink into the tree.

“Are you hard?” Billy asked.  Steve swallowed and closed his eyes, wishing the world could swallow him up.  “Seriously?”

“I’m not talking with you about this,” Steve squeaked, trying to move away.  Billy pinned him even more against the tree, sliding a leg between Steve’s thighs.  He let out an involuntary whimper.

“You are,” Billy said, almost with wonder.  Steve opened his eyes, meeting Billy’s blue ones.  They were calculating, stripping him down, and it made Steve shiver.  Billy’s tongue flicked over his bottom lip and his mouth curled up at the side.  “Is it from the lack of pussy?  Not enough girls begging to wet your dick?”

“Why are you so gross,” Steve breathed, closing his eyes again.  “It’s not-- Just drop it--”

“Oh, so you only get like this,” Billy trailed a finger over Steve’s clothed dick, making him let out a choked cry, “For me?” Steve’s eyes snapped open and Billy grinned.  There was something hungry in his eyes that made something hot curl through Steve, made him breath a little harder.  But, well, this was Billy.  He was probably fucking with him.

“Fuck off,” Steve breathed out, finding it hard to control his voice.  He tried to push at Billy’s shoulders, tried to avoid those piercing eyes, but Billy caught his face in one hand, making Steve look at him.  He slowly pushed his thumb into Steve’s mouth, pulling it open.  The salty taste of his skin on Steve’s tongue made him breathe harder, chest heaving, pupils dilating.

God he was gonna get the shit beat outta him for this.

“I thought I was,” Billy began, trailing off.  He pulled his lower lip into his mouth, tongue peeking out as he looked in Steve’s eyes, at his mouth, still open and panting.  Gripped Steve through his pants, making his legs tremble.  He was grateful for the tree behind him, that was for sure, otherwise he might have stumbled from his legs turning into jelly.  Steve’s chest heaved, nervous and aroused, and Billy exhaled heavily through his nose.

“Thaw yoo were wha?” Steve asked, breathy and mangled from Billy still holding his mouth open, thumb pressed against Steve’s tongue.

“The way you look at me,” Billy said, eyes heated now, hungry, almost rabid with want.  “Thought I was imagining it.  But this,” he rubbed over Steve’s erection again, making him tremble, “Suggests that maybe I wasn’t.” Steve stared at Billy, dick throbbing.  Billy licked over his bottom lip, almost unconsciously.  His eyes flicked down to Steve’s bulge, a weird groan escaping him.  It made Steve’s dick twitch in his jean almost painfully.  Billy’s eyes widened and his eyes snapped back up to Steve’s.

“‘illy,” Steve tried, still unable to speak clearly with that thick fucking thumb on his tongue.

“God,” Billy groaned, shaking again, but with restraint.  Like he was trying not to touch Steve more than he was already.  “You’re so fucking-- You want this, don’t you?” Steve tried to shake his head, to deny the fucking obvious truth.  “You want my dick in your mouth?  Stretching those pretty pink lips?” And god, Steve did.  He’d never had a dick in his mouth but god, did he want.  He nodded, weakly.  Billy tsked, pulling Steve’s mouth open more, until it almost hurt.  His dick shouldn’t have liked it as much as it did but, well.  “No no, Harrington,” Billy crooned.  “Use your words.” He leaned in, lips brushing against Steve’s ear as their bodies pressed together.  Steve couldn’t feel the cold, couldn’t feel anything but the heat of Billy’s body pressed against him.  Of his erection pressing against Steve’s thigh.  Fuck.  “Tell me you want this,” he hissed, breath puffing against Steve’s ear, sending goosebumps across his body.  He gave a full body shiver, could practically feel Billy’s grin against his lobe, a wet tongue slowly following the shell.  Steve felt like he couldn’t breathe and he never wanted it to stop.  “Tell me you want me.”

“‘uck , ‘illy,” Steve wheezed, arching his back so their hips ground together, eliciting a moan from himself and a hiss from Billy.  “Ye, ye, p’ease.” Billy’s hand fell out of his mouth, one hand gripping Steve’s hip as the other made quick work of his belt and zipper.  There was a damp spot on the outside of his jeans, the inside of his underwear sticky from where he had been steadily leaking, and Billy’s sharp inhale made Steve groan.  Billy looked at him, eyes hazy with lust as he licked his palm, maintaining eye contact as his gripped Steve’s dick, freed from the confines of his clothes.  Steve’s eyes fluttered closed and his mouth opened in a silent gasp as he tilted his head back, thunking against the tree.  “Fuck,” he whined, hands gripping Billy’s biceps.

“I fucking knew it,” Billy hissed, leaning to press open mouthed kisses to Steve’s neck.  The heat of Billy mixed with the cold, harsh air, drove Steve fucking mad.  His head was foggy, filled to the brim with Billy.  “Every time I shoved you, fucking every time I looked at you, I could see it.” Steve gasped as Billy latched onto his neck, biting and sucking.  It was so different than anything Steve had experienced, even with the guys he’d fooled around with.  Billy was rough, yet somehow still gentle, still attentive.  His hand was slow, leisurely stroking Steve and swiping the head with his thumb.  Steve wasn’t sure he’d still be upright if it wasn’t for Billy holding him up against the tree.

“See what?” He gasped.

“That you wanted me,” Billy replied, breath hot against Steve’s neck.  “Wanted me to shove you, touch you.” Steve was dripping, shaking as Billy teased him.  “You know how long I’ve wanted to do this to you?” Billy whispered against Steve’s skin.  Steve shook his head, unable to make his voice work.  “Since that fucking party.  Wanted to fucking claim you.” Steve found that he really, really wanted that too.

“Then do it,” he rasped, one shaky hand coming up to tangle in the hair at the nape of Billy’s neck.  Billy’s hand faltered before pulling away.  Steve whined, head tilting back down to look.  Billy looked almost feral, eyes wild and face flushed.  He made quick work of his jeans, pulling out his cock, angry and red and hard.  Steve’s mouth fucking watered.  Billy held his hand up, the one slick with Steve’s precum, and ordered,

“Lick.” Steve didn’t need to be told twice.  He ran his tongue over Billy’s hand, getting it wet and spit slick.  Billy watched, breathing hard through his nose, before he pulled his hand away, using the other to turn Steve around.  “Pants at your knees, pretty boy.” His voice was low, husky, and Steve would do whatever he said.  He could feel it, the need to obey.  He’d never wanted to just let someone have their way with him, use him, but he found himself imagining Billy, relaxed as he ordered Steve to please him.  He shuddered at the thought.  Steve shimmied his jeans and underwear down, leaning against the tree and looking over his shoulder.  Billy was stroking himself slowly, letting drool spill down his tongue and onto his dick until is was wet, dripping with saliva.  Steve groaned.

“I’m not--  I’ve never--”

“Don’t you worry,” Billy said, hands gripping Steve’s cheeks as he squatted, pulling them apart.  “When I fuck you, it’s gonna be thorough.  Gonna open you on my fingers until you beg for me to stuff you with my cock.” And then he licked a hot, wet stripe from Steve’s perineum all the way up to his hole, circling the rim.

“Oh holy shit,” Steve cried, hips jerking back.  He felt Billy’s chuckle against his skin.  He lost himself in the sensation of Billy’s tongue, his mouth, licking and sucking at Steve’s taint and thighs until they were slick and wet.  The sound he made, primal and needy, when Billy stood, almost made him embarrassed.  He was too horny though.

“Clench those thighs for me, King,” Billy said, pressing a kiss to one of Steve’s back dimples.  Steve shuddered, but did as he was told.  When he felt Billy’s dick slide against the crease of his legs, he gasped, fingers clenching against the bark of the tree.  The head of Billy’s cock slowly pushed in, gliding through the spit, now warmed by Steve’s skin.  It was veiny, thick, and velvety soft against the meat of Steve’s thighs.  When the tip brushed against the back of his balls, Steve whimpered, biting his lip.  Billy’s hand was tight, bruising against his hip.  The other came and pulled Steve’s hair, tilting his head back so he couldn’t hide any noises.

“Please, please, please,” Steve rambled, mind blanking out except for Billy.  The feel of him between his thighs, the smell of his cologne, fuck, even the rough denim of his jeans against the back of his thighs.  He didn’t even know what he was begging for.  Billy let out a long, rumbling groan.

“Jesus fuck,” Billy said, voice sounding as wrecked as Steve felt.  His hips snapped forward, slapping against Steve’s thighs and ass, and Steve gasped, fingers painfully gripping at the tree bark.  He hadn’t expected it, but the glide of Billy’s dick against his thighs was incredible.  The way the head tickled the back of his balls, the way he could feel Billy’s dick leaking precum, sliding it around as he made Steve’s thighs slicker and slicker.  Steve clamped them as tightly as he could, getting an aborted moan for his efforts.  He grinned as Billy moved faster, hips slamming against Steve, forcing high pitched moans out every time.  “Look at you,” Billy rumbled.  “So fuckin’ pretty like this, Harrington.  Bent over like the needy little bitch you are.” Steve should have bristled at the words, should have pushed Billy away, but something inside him went white hot in pleasure.  Made his cock drip.

Like most things Steve was discovering about himself, it came down to Billy.  If anyone else tried it, he’d hate it.  But, fuck.  Billy made it sound like the best thing in the world.

“Yeah,” Steve breathed out.  “Fuck yeah I am.” Billy let out a sound that made heat burst in Steve’s groin, brought him even closer to the edge.  His hips shuttered, moving wildly until he slammed himself against Steve, curling down and pressing his forehead against Steve’s back as he came.  Steve moved one hand down, jerking himself off almost painfully fast.  The feeling of spit and cum, warm against his skin, cooling rapidly in the air, was almost too much.  Billy moved to pull away but Steve whined, making him stop.  “Just--  Stay there.”

“Jesus,” he heard Billy whisper.  And like that, Steve came, painting the tree in white stripes of spunk.  He cried out, loud where Billy had been quiet, muffling his sounds.  Steve was loud, he knew that, but he reached obscene levels as he trembled, orgasm making him nearly black out.

They stayed that way, panting as their sweat rapidly cooled.  Billy finally pulled away, hands leaving Steve and he missed the feeling immediately.

God he was so fucked.

Steve didn’t turn around as he caught his breath, shakily using the tree to stand erect.  He pulled up his jeans, not bothering to clean up.  Wasn’t sure he wanted to admit to himself that he wanted the feeling of cum and spit sticking to his skin, dampening his jeans and underwear, dirty and so fucking hot.  When he turned around, Billy had his back to him, the sound of his zippo clicking loud in the wake of what they’d just done.

“Uhm,” Steve began, because, like, where do you go from here?

“We can keep this under wraps,” Billy said, back still to Steve.  He let out a cloud of smoke, thicker in the cold air.  Steve noticed the tension in his shoulders, in his voice, and he swallowed, wondering if he’d fucked up.

“Yeah,” Steve said, fingers twitching nervously against his thigh.  “But uh,” he took a sharp inhale, forcing the words out, “My parents aren’t usually home so, you know, if you ever wanna like, let off some steam--”

“Aw, Harrington,” Billy teased, finally turning around.  “You like my dick that much?” Steve wasn’t sure what it was, but something told him he needed to be honest.  To tell the truth, or Billy’d run and never look back.

“Yeah,” he replied, honest.  Billy’s eyes widened and his mouth went a little slack.  But the attraction and want that shone in his eyes let Steve know he’d made the right choice.  “Maybe next time you can let me choke on it.”

[parkersharthook]

Some Very Specific Hypotheticals

(Tom Holland x female!reader)

warnings: it’s thirst tweets so it’s slightly smutty and risque

1.5k+ words

a/n: so I got all of the thirsty tweets towards tom from jordan fisher’s video (x) and all of the thirsty tweets towards the reader from tana mongeau’s video (x). I did make up a few of my own lol but most of them come from those videos

Edit: I recognize tana is problematic and I only used her in one of the tweets bc I had originally gotten these thrist tweets from her video. I don’t actually watch/like her so I was unaware of her issues until recently when she came up in the news (I still don’t really know what the whole situation was tbh) anyways.... I changed tana mongeau to anna kendrick bc i have a crush on her lol

requested: Could you please write a Tom Holland x reader reading thirst tweets

“Hey guys I’m y/n/ y/l/n.”

“And I’m Tom Holland.”

“And today for some reason the two of us, who are in a couple, will be reading the other person’s thirst tweets to them.”

“it’s like some weird version of foreplay.”

“I’m excited.”

--

You sat in the chair, facing Tom. The two of you had matching blue jugs with little slips of paper full of what you assumed was raunchy girls, and probably guys, thirsting after the two of you.

“Which one of us is going first?” Tom asked as he fiddled with the bucket.

“Oh definitely me.” You pulled out a slip and smoothed it out, “it says in all caps by the way, ‘DAMN DADDY U SEXY CAN I EAT UR ASS?!?! LICK YA BUTT??!!?!” You barely got the full tweet out before you were laughing.

Tom had already turned a shade of pink and was rubbing at the back of his neck awkwardly. He stuttered slightly, “wow what a way to start this whole thing. Okay, my turn.” He pulled out the next slip, “y/n y/l/n is literally the most beautiful human ever. Goodbye.”

“aww wait that was so sweet. Thank you.”

“Why was mine about eating my ass and yours was saying you were the most beautiful person ever?”

You laughed slightly and shrugged, “look, everyone is just speaking their truth. My turn!” You happily grabbed the next piece of paper, “haha it’s literally just a screenshot of your age with the words ‘thank god’. If that is not the biggest mood ever…”

Tom laughed heavily. “yeah I had someone tweet me saying ‘I saw a lot of people looking up Tom Holland’s age during the movie.’ Guess it’s a recurring theme.” He fingered through the bucket before grabbing a crumpled sheet, “I want y/n y/l/n to murder my bussy.”

You threw your head back in laughter, “I get that one a lot actually. A classic, really.”

Tom looked around sheepishly, blushing hard. “what’s a bussy?”

You snickered slightly, “it’s a butthole tom. You need to educate yourself. Next one! I love how everyone in the world can agree that tom Holland is hot af and daddy material, even the lesbians.”

“okay that one is definitely the forerunner, that’s a good one.”

You looked back down at the paper with a smile, “that is a good one.”

“’Repeat after me: y/n y/ln makes me horny y/n y/ln makes me horny y/n y/ln makes me horny y/n y/ln makes me horny y/n y/ln makes me horny y/n y/ln makes me horny y/n y/ln makes me horny’. And it says that like 16 more times.” Tom shrugged slightly, “I mean… I can’t exactly disagree.”

“Tom!” You cried slightly exasperated as you blushed. “I’m moving on now… ‘Tom Holland’s lil ass is hella fine’.”

“What? My ass is not little.”

You laughed, “relax they said it was and I quote ‘hella fine’. That’s a compliment.”

Tom grumbled slightly as he grabbed the next tweet, “I want to have a threesome with y/n y/l/n. but no tom Holland. It’s just her, me, and a blunt.” He threw the paper down with a little angry frown, “so first they call my ass little and then they steal you for a threesome? Rude.”

You bit your lip with a small chuckle, “if it makes you feel better, it’s not really a threesome thinking that one member is literally a blunt.”

“can we move on before I get jealous?”

“of a random twitter user and weed? Yeah okay sweetie.” You rolled your eyes heavily, eyeing the paper. Tom watched as your eyes grew wide and then a shit eating grin cracked your lips.

“oh… what is it?”

“this tweet is very specific.” You smiled as you met his eye and began reading it, “look how fine this man is i want him to fuck me on a bed of money and finger me with a $100 bill wrapped around his fingers and then stuff ten thousand $100 bills inside me so he can call me his million dollar pussy.”

“oh… my… god.” Tom said slowly, a deep blush rising on his cheeks. “that- that one was a lot to take in.”

You waved the paper in the yes, “yes. Just… yes. This one cleared my skin, watered my crops. Amazing, perfect.”

“shut up, you’re so annoying sometimes.” He stated as he rolled his eyes.

You poked your tongue out at him teasingly, “you love me.”

“unfortunately.” You scoffed as Tom leaned over and patted your knee lovingly. “you know I’m kidding baby.”

“whatever just read the next damn tweet.”

Tom laughed and pulled out the next one, “I would pay any amount of money for y/n y/l/n to spit in my face and call me an ugly fucking bitch. It would be my honor.”

Your mouth fell open in shock as you looked between Tom, your friends behind the camera, and the crew. Well, that threw you for a loop.

“I- I… don’t know what to say to that. I don’t think I’m comfortable spitting in your face, that seems mean. But… I’m not here to kink shame so thank you I guess.”

There were a few snorts behind the camera as you picked the next one, “Tom Holland is both cute and sexy at the time and it’s really messing with my sanity.”

Tom smirked at the camera and flipped his collar, “I mean what can I say?”

“it’s a point of contention in our household for sure.”

“That I’m sexy and cute?”

You shook your head, “no, that you think your sexy and cute. It’s cocky and rude.”

Tom laughed, “it’s cocky and rude to be confident?”

You turned to the camera, “see? Point of contention.”

“I just think that you’re losing your sanity over my cuteness and sexiness.”

You shrugged obnoxiously, “oh you caught me.” You pointed to his bucket, “please keep going.”

“Okay but imagine: a y/n y/l/n Anna Kendrick sex scene. I mean the power and sexuality they hold is absurd.”

You slapped your hand on your knee, “I love Anna. She’s so funny and I would love to do a sex scene with her or just sex her really.”

“seriously?” tom said exasperated, “you’re sitting here in front of your boyfriend and you’re saying that you want to have sex with someone else?”

You nodded, “yes.”

“dude.”

“relax, it’s not actually going to happen, it’s just hypothetical.”

“you wound me.”

“here, let me boost your ego with a thirst tweet. Tom Holland is fine as hell, I’d eat that ass like a chocolate croissant, chomp chomp bitch. He could choke and kill me and I’d only ask for more. Lemme chomp chomp on that bussy please.”

“wow… I’m not sure that cheered me up exactly but thank you none the less.” He pulled a new slip, “At least 3 times a week me and my boyfriend talk about wanting to have a threesome with y/n y/l/n.”

“wow…”

“why is everyone trying to have sex with my girlfriend?”

“because I’m hot as fuck.”

“can’t argue with that.”

“Alright next one, Tom Holland with that half smile and lip bite fuuuuuckk nope nope nope.”

“okay, that one made me feel better.” Tom said with a little smirk causing you to roll your eyes and laugh.

Tom grabbed the next one, “y/n y/l/n has the best boobs. That’s it that’s the tweet.” He waved the paper a bit, “I happen to agree with you.”

“well thank you for thinking my boobs are great.” You plucked out a new tweet, “Daily reminder: tom Holland is daddy af.”

“I should set an alarm for myself that goes off at the same time every day that just blares ‘Tom Holland is daddy af’.”

“absolutely not. Veto. Nix. Not happening.”

“you’re just mad they think I’m daddy.” You gestured to the bucket, causing tom to roll his eyes and reach into it. “y/n y/l/n can choke me and run me over and I’d say thank you and sorry for the dent in your car.”

You let out a loud bark of laughter, “that’s super funny. Definitely the funniest one I’ve heard so far. Whoever wrote this, you’re funny and I appreciate your comical genius.”

“alright I think we have like one more each, let’s do this.”

“Tom Holland is either a smol puppy or a sex god, there is no in between.” You shook your head, “I actually think there is an in between. It’s called boyfriend Tom. It’s when he’s all cuddly but not quite as baby as smol puppy. Like he’s still a functioning adult but he’s being sweet.”

“ya know… sometimes you can be pretty sweet.”

“aww thanks babe.” You leaned forward to give him a little peck before smiling brightly, “last one! Make me blush!”

“Hey @y/n can I lick your forehead?” you two sat in silence for a moment before tom furrowed his brow, “is that like a sexual thing?”

“I guess…? That’s a new request though, I’ve never heard that one. Interesting.”

“what’s your answer?”

“huh?”

“can you lick their forehead?”

“I’m going to go with no…”

“and that’s the end of our really fun and definitely not at all awkward video!” tom said excitedly

“thanks for watching everyone! We love you and thanks for tweeting thirsty stuff!”

[starkerintheparker]

starker reclist - canon based fics

Hi Starker fam! To celebrate my 900 followers I decided to finally start posting my humble and very personal reclist. I’ve been planning to do it for a while now but it got way bigger than I anticipated so I decided to split it in 4 parts and will share the first one today. I’ve been around for less than a year and there’s a lot I haven’t read yet so my plan is to update this list as I go. 

Under the cut is part I, solely is dedicated to canon-based fics. I’m a sucker for angst so most of my recs feature guilty!Tony, miscommunication, porn with feels and all that jazz. Hopefully you’ll be able to find something interesting according to your preferences. Oh and don’t forget to leave kudos, comments and spread the love for these authors :) Cheers!

Last updated: 2020/04/18. All new fics added will be marked with ***

• 10 Ways to Woo Your Boo by @darker-soft-starker (NR, 6k, completed)

Summary: By twenty-one Peter Parker had graduated college, scored himself a post-grad job and was a full-fledged member of the Avengers. He had his own apartment, paid his own bills and juggled his time between being a superhero and working enough to cover his rent. So long as Peter was armed with his ID, he was a full-fledged adult in the eyes of the law. Perhaps foolishly, he’d assumed it would make him an adult in the eyes of everybody else too. Keen to be seen as worthy of Tony's heart, Peter enlists the help of his friends and the internet in courting his former mentor.

Review: We all love Ash’s fantastic AUs but this lovely canon-based fic may be one of my favorite works by her. I will never know how she manages the fine balance between angst, humor and romance, I just know it hits me good and takes my breath away. Oblivious!Tony and Peter being a bisexual disaster at wooing, what do you mean this wasn’t in the movies? Sounds canon to me.

• 100-Point Restoration by Destina (T, 8k, completed)

Summary: Tony needs a happiness upgrade; Peter wants Tony. These goals might be compatible. (This story is set roughly five years post-Homecoming).

Review: I just realized this was the first Starker fic I’ve read, and it was back in 2017! I didn’t ship Starker at the time but this author must have done something right because for some reason I couldn’t take my eyes away. This fic is gorgeous. Tony’s voice is amazing, his dynamics with Peter are spot-on and organic - but nothing’s better than watching their feelings unfold, like a soft and warm humming just awaiting for disclosure.

• adult supervision by doveslayer (M, 20k, on hiatus)

Summary: Peter Parker should not keep drunk-dialing Tony Stark after midnight. But more pressingly, Tony Stark should not keep answering. In which Tony tries to convince himself he's doing nothing wrong. warning: underage!Peter tho pretty vanilla imo                                                                                        

Review: My favorite “everything is happening while nothing is happening” fic. Their voices are spot on, the dialogues are clever, and you can almost touch the tension with your fingertips. It’s been a year since the last update but even if this fic never gets finished I promise the read will have been worthy!

• Attached by @paspleurer (E, 7k, completed)

Summary: Tony gets it, he really does. As far as rebounds go, sleeping with your childhood hero isn't half bad. And if what Peter wants is this— just sex, with no strings attached— then Tony will give him this.

Review: Pleurer and Learned Foot have seduced me with the rebound trope. This is a lovely Tony POV with the good old pining + miscommunication combo, plus enthusiastic sex and sweet domesticity. What else could I ask for?

• Covet by RTC anonymous (E, 34k, completed)

Summary: Peter has a new boyfriend. Tony starts drinking again, for unrelated reasons.

Review: I read this fic when I was still warily lurking around the Starker fandom and it blew me away. The sexual tension is so palpable you can almost taste it. There is jealous, guity Tony failing at mentoring and a vulnerable, smitten Peter Parker trying to make sense out of it. RTC anon is a religion.

• Ephemeron by @ramblings-from-elsinore (E)

Summary: "Being around Ned, Peter's reminded how out of place he is. For Ned, the second ever appearance of aliens over Manhattan is the stuff of excited hallway chatter, of where were you when—? Ned’s world wasn’t blown apart and stitched back together. Because Ned doesn’t remember. No one does, except the ones who were there, who fought." AKA, "Tony's relationship with Peter may be unconventional, but they’re unconventional people who have had some pretty fucking unconventional experiences." In which Tony can't stop touching Peter to make sure he's real, and Peter dreams of being in Tony's arms and not disappearing.

Review: I started reading this fic before I joined the fandom and man, what a way to get pulled into this ship. Brace yourself for hardcore guilty!Tony being all over the place plus unhealthy codependency and touch deprivation, all the good things. Reading this is a spiritual experience but fair warning: this is not a happy story, at least not for a long while, so please mind the tags.

• Expiration Date by @learned-foot​ (E, 12k, completed)

Summary: Tony knows exactly what this is. First big breakup, go for a fling with a completely inappropriate person. It’s basically a cliché. He kind of thought Peter was better than that, but apparently being brilliant and one of the bravest people on the face of the planet doesn’t mean he’s immune from being a stupid college student who makes stupid college student mistakes. AKA Tony is sure this is just a fling, and he deals with that about as well as you’d expect.

Review: Ahh my beloved rebound trope and my first rec (out of many) by LF! Between a pining, insecure Tony making all the wrong decisions and a young and confident Peter unwilling to let him go, this fic makes your heart ache in the best ways. Good thing LF only works with happy endings!

• From Thy Bounty by @ibby-writes​ and feyrelay (E, 31k, completed)

Summary: Tony’s eyes are always dark, but now there's almost no iris left. He looks hollowed out. There’s something terribly hungry there, despite the feast they've filled themselves on.

Review: I’ve lost count of how many times I reread this insanely hot and ridiculously well written fic. Besides the A+++ characterization, there is delicious food porn foreplay followed by a breathtaking cat and mouse game that culminates with no less than 13.5k of intense and unapologetic sex with feels, my favorite kind. Enjoy the meal! ;D

***Gift of Choice by tuesday (E, 12k, completed)

Summary: Tony Stark had a thing about giving Peter stuff.

Review: This is my favorite fic by tuesday and the PERFECT rendition of our beloved sugar daddy trope. Great pacing, amazing dialogues and a breathtaking build up that makes you both smile and sweat in anticipation. They’re so in love I almost can’t handle when they finally get together. Sexy, hot and very sweet.  

• here is my hand, my heart by belatrix (E, 16k, completed)

Summary: Mostly, Tony had tried not to look. He still does. Try, that is. It’s just― it’s getting a little bit harder every day.

Review: I have a HUGE soft spot for this beautiful masterpiece, because it was the fic that finally made me join the Starker fandom. I’ve reread it so many times and it never fails to amaze me. Through an atmospheric non-linear narrative, this shows a guilt-ridden Tony Stark trying and failing to resist one determined Peter Parker who won’t take bullshit for an answer. Hot, and angsty, and breathtaking.

• I know that you got Daddy Issues (And I do too) by feyrelay (E)

Summary: The one where Peter’s blue balls save the world. Because, yeah? That meandering, blooming thing between him and Mr. Stark? That relationship that continues to be maddeningly legal, platonic, and above-board, but still somehow haunts Peter’s wildest wet-dreams? That might just be the key to Strange’s endgame.

Review: This fic is a love letter to those who appreciate an angsty and nuanced slow burn like me. Possibly the best character study I’ve ever read combined with a clever, well researched and intricated plot. Reading this will make you fall even more in love with Tony and Peter as individuals, before wanting them to be better together. Make sure to also check all related fics under the tag DIEU (Daddy Issues Extended Universe) - the Starker verse we fucking deserve.

• if I am the river, you are the ocean by sadonsundays (E, 7k, completed)

Summary: The one where Tony can't sleep and Peter can't stop his hands from shaking.

Review: This is a gorgeous recovery fic, painful and heartbreaking, yes, but still very gentle as Tony and Peter’s relationship quietly unfolds. Pepper is an absolute treat which was refreshing to me. I just love the quiet and angsty undertone that guides their journey until they finally find home in each other.

if you’d grant my love a pardon by belatrix (M, 2.5k, completed)

Summary: The first time, it goes something like this: “No,” Tony says, but it’s tired, half-hearted, not quite a denial.

Review: One of the reasons why I love this ship is that there’s always room for angst, even when they’re already together. This lovely yet heartbreaking fic mirrors Tony’s fragile heart as he realizes that as much as he should, he just can’t let go of Peter, not quite yet. Belatrix writes guilty!Tony’s headspace like nobody else and I just can’t recommend her writing enough.

• in the light of a dying star by @areiton​ (M, 6k, completed) fix-it

Summary: Extremis isn't a guarantee. That's what Pepper told him, as they took him off the bloody, dusty field. It was just a chance. A desperate gamble.

Review: I’m so glad I read this right after Endgame because this is the fix-it Tony and we all deserved, this fic is so comforting and beautiful. I really love the quiet, ethereal atmosphere and how it shapes our perception of time and character development. Peter is beautifully written and their get together made my heart ache in peace.

• In the Morning by @cagestark​ (M, 6k, completed)

Summary: Peter's pretty stressed. He isn't understanding physics despite all the extra time he is spending with Bruce. And underneath it all, something is wrong with Mr. Stark.

Review: Heart wrenching and painfully honest fic, where Tony is a jealous mess and Peter is his usual earnest, sweet and good self. They meet in the middle, and it’s quiet, beautiful and sad.  

• Kiss Me by @ironspi​

Summary: Five times Peter and Tony almost kiss and one time they did.

Review: This fic was such a lovely surprise! It begins unpretentious and it builds up to quality pining and unresolved sexual tension. Chapter 4 is particularly awesome, so charged and intimate. Kudos to the author for exploring Peter taking the lead and making Tony melt in his arms.

• Landslide by spqr (M, 8k, completed) fix-it

Summary: Peter jumps into the quantum realm with his heart in his throat. He steps out in 2018, on the edge of a lake he still has nightmares about. A hundred yards away over the water, the lights in the lakehouse are on.

Review: Morally ambiguous characters + angsty time travel? Count me in. This fic has a very interesting (and darker) take on Peter post-Thanos, in his raw and desperate grief over Tony. Bonus points for amazing dialogues and a fix-it plot so clever and believable I’m surprised I didn’t see it on screen.  

• lean on me now by @areiton​ (G, 9k, on hiatus)

Summary: He’s so tired, and he hurts, the kind of screaming pain he’s struggling to ignore now, and he wants to go home. But he can do this. He can sit and watch, and keep them safe. A wry smile tugs at his lips because he knows how ridiculous that sounds--a kid keeping Avengers safe.

Review: One of the best canon divergence fics I’ve ever read. It’s quiet, angsty and Peter’s voice is simply amazing. My heart breaks for Tony, but I’m so here for Peter & Rhodey’s brOTP, the fandom deserves more of it.

• noticing by @areiton​ (NR, 2k, completed)

Summary: “You deserve to be happy,” Rhodey tells Tony once, when Tony is drinking and conflicted and Peter is sleeping unaware on the couch. Tony watches him, eyes bright.

Review: How could I ever resist seeing Tony and Peter’s relationship development through Rhodey’s protective and thoughtful gaze? Any Tony stan should read this fic because this is the kind of love, friendship and support he deserves. Reading this put my mind at rest, knowing Tony’s cared for, and safe.

• Obvious by @learned-foot​ (M, 14k, completed)

Summary: When Peter wakes up, several things become very clear all at once: he’s underground somewhere unpleasant, something is messing with his powers, and his entire body hurts. A lot.

Review: WHUMP WHUMP WHUMP *victory dance* god this one is brutal, but we can trust LF to bring on full angst with an intriguing plot and A+++ characterization. I’m so here for protective!Tony doing whatever it takes to keep Peter safe, including all the confusion and heartbreak his problematic decisions may bring.

• Permission by @cagestark​ (E, 16k, completed)

Summary: During drinks with the Avengers, Peter admits that he enjoys orgasms more when someone is giving him permission, though since he's single, there isn't anyone in his life to offer it. Generous Tony offers to offer it.

Review: This fic is unique and so very hot, but don’t let the smutty summary fool you. There is also tenderness and FEELS in capital letters. Despite their arrangement, pining!Tony is so vulnerable and so completely in love with Peter it kinda breaks my heart a little, but thankfully Cage is a big fan of happy endings like me, so we’re all safe in her hands.

***Post-Endgame NYE by @darker-soft-starker (M, completed)

Summary:  Five years after the events of endgame Tony is resurrected. Months after that, he's still trying to find equilibrium

Review: Hands down the loveliest ‘flirting on a bench’ I’ve ever seen, and my top favorite NYE Starker fic. I love to see Tony facing an existential crisis while he navigates his new life post-resurrection, including the violent realization of ‘oh no, Peter’s an attractive adult now’. Gentle and gorgeous get together, kudos at Morgan for being a little devil and playing matchmaking.

• Proxy by @cagestark​ (E, 11k, completed)

Summary: Peter wants to know if Mr. Stark knows, like, anybody who’d be willing to make out with him. Things escalate from there.

Review: I have such a big soft spot for this fic because “by proxy” is one of my favorite tropes and Cage explored it masterfully. Again, this is pining!Tony at his best and Cage just has this ability to transform what once started as a sexy little thing into this soft and gentle love story, the kind that gives you butterflies in the stomach.

• Radar by @intoxicatelou​ (M)

Summary: Peter could say that he’s officially approached desperation, but he wants this, wants Tony, and he’s willing to do everything it takes. Or the one in which Peter tries to become Tony's celebrity crush from 2009 in order to seduce him.

Review: This is one of my favorites self-indulgent fics, I just can’t resist the good old “Peter’s seduction handbook” trope and intoxicatelou delivers it beautifully. This story is sweet, super fun and relatable af. There’s A+ pining, Peter being a bisexual disaster and MJ being the queen we all stan, shocking absolutely no one.

• Revelations by RTC anonymous (E, 127k, completed)

Summary: “I still don’t get it,” Ned says. “How you just... keep being ordinary in spite of all the craziness you’ve lived through. You were in space. You helped Iron Man save the universe. And nobody knows it was you.” His tone softens, becomes almost sad. As though he realizes that what he’s saying is so completely alien to him that he will never be able to understand this part of Peter’s life. “Peter, don’t you want people to know you for who you are?” An AU where they get the Gauntlet off of Thanos that first time, on Titan.

Review: I feel like I don’t need to justify this choice – almost everyone in the fandom has either heard of or read this masterpiece, it’s safe to say this fic is part of the Starker Training Wheels Protocol lol. If you have just arrived or is just exploring the fandom and enjoys slow burns I suggest you start right hee because it doesn’t get any better than this. There’s A+++ characterization, breathtaking pining, insane sexual tension and a very satisfying ending if I may say so. Definitely among my top 3 Starker fics. RTC anon, wherever you are, please know you are loved and appreciated. I’ll literally build an altar for you.

• Reversal by @learned-foot​ (E, 4k, completed)

Summary: Sometimes, Tony is the one who needs to be praised.

Review: For once Peter makes Tony just lie down and take 😊 the fucking 😊 praise 😊. I feel like I’ve been waiting for this fic all my life. This is the praise kink Tony (and we all) deserve, genuine, gentle and powerful. If you’re a big sap for their love like I am, you’re in for an emotional ride because this is overwhelmingly sweet to the point it brings tears to your eyes. LF is such a gift to this fandom.  

• Settling by @cagestark​ (E, 5k, completed)

Summary: Peter really wants to be taller than Tony. Heels help.

Review: One of my favorites by Cage, I still remember how happy and giggly I felt when I first read it. There is A+++ characterization, amazing dialogue, Avengers domesticity, praise kink, the hottest blow job and my favorite Starker first kiss. Oh, did I mention Peter in heels and Tony loving every moment of it? You’re welcome :D

• Stipulations by RTC anonymous (E, 70k, completed)

Summary: Peter Parker’s long term dream recently went from ‘get into MIT’ to ‘afford going to MIT’. As the time approaches, it’s dawning on him that he won’t be able to pay his tuition and afford the move to Cambridge all at once: he’s out of money, his secrets are beginning to pile up, and desperation has started creeping in... And then one night, he saves Tony Stark’s life.

Review: Another fandom classic by our irreplaceable RTC anon, this fic is SO GOOD I keep coming back to it and just recently I realized I’ve built all my personal Starker headcanons out of it, lol. A+++ characterization and hot, delicious pining is a given with this author, but I’m really here for that senses-dialed-to-11 trope, and RTC delivers it masterfully.  

• subtle by @areiton​ (T, 1k, completed)

Summary: Peter is not subtle. He wears his emotion, his excitement, like a flag waved bright red and teasing for a bull—impossible to go unnoticed, impossible to ignore. It’s adorable and it’s Peter, and it’s—in hindsight—why Tony misses the context clues.

Review: This fic is like reading poetry, a balm to the heart. Peter wears Tony’s colors and by the time Tony finally gets the context clues they fall together in the gentlest, softest way.

• Take it slow by tuesday (E, 13k, completed)

Summary: There were a ton of reasons dating Peter was a bad idea. Tony loved bad ideas. He was going to do it anyway. In which Tony thinks they're dating, and then they're dating undercover.

Review: This fic is so endearing it’s basically impossible not to cheer for these two, despite their usual infuriating communication issues, lol. But I promise all the angst and wait are worth it, because there’s nothing more satisfying than seeing how they (finally!) get to be on the same page.

• the record spins on the trails we blaze by @darker-soft-starker​ (NR, 5k, completed)

Summary: Years after the events of Homecoming, Peter thought all of the bad memories were well and truly behind him. After all, so much has happened since then - and he's happy now. Everything is kinda perfect.Turns out nothing stays buried.

Review: Hell yes! I agree HoCo’s events were particularly traumatizing and this trope is not as explored as it should be. To put it simply, this fic is something I didn’t know that I needed and Ash delivered it beautifully. It’s incredibly gentle, cathartic and honest, not to mention the lovely domesticity and understanding between the characters that will make your heart swell.

• Under Someone Else by @learned-foot (M, 7k, completed)

Summary: Peter realizes he’s just a rebound. And he’s okay with that, really. Or at least, that’s what he keeps telling himself.

Review: FEELS, FEELS EVERYWHERE. It’s so hard to choose a favorite fic by LF but this is the first that comes to mind because it introduced me to the amazing rebound trope. It’s so refreshing to see this ship’s potential for angst and miscommunication playing into the “fuck first, talk later” scenario. Warning for vulnerable boys being idiots and breaking our hearts but P.P.P.S they do eventually get their shit together and it’s glorious!

• Up for Anything by tuesday (E, 8k, completed)

Summary: When it came to Tony Stark, Peter would take what he could get. In which Peter believes he's just a rebound. (Not Endgame compliant.)

Review: Of course there’s yet another gorgeous rebound rec because I can’t get enough of this trope. Honestly, LF and Tuesday writing for each other have provided some of the best fics this fandom has, God bless them. This is another treat featuring pining!Peter and the usual “I can’t communicate properly how much I fucking love you”, but there’s also bantering, delicious dirty talk and so much affection that you’ll read it all with the biggest smile on your face.

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Managed: Part 3

Pairings: Clark Kent x Reader (Henry Cavill Clark)

Warnings: Maybe swearing

Word Count: 2,777

A/N: Doesn’t have a completed end yet, but just giving you more content to try to get myself out of a writing funk.

Part 1 / Part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“OK, hold the fuck on.” Your best friend from work, Sarah, said as she waited patiently for you to safely enter your currently room temperature hot tub to cool off on your first hot day of spring. “You’re the one dating Clark Kent?! Tall, drop dead gorgeous, hasn’t looked at a single woman since he started at Blue Ridge to the point we were starting to think he was gay, Clark Kent?”

“People thought he was gay?” You asked with a huffed laugh as you sat down in your favorite spot.

“I mean, have you seen how he dresses?” She asked as she got in and sat across from you. “Those tight shirts?”

“So that makes him gay?!” You laughed as you wrapped your ponytail into a bun and secured it with the hair tie on your wrist.

“OK, not exclusively.” She laughed as she hit the display panel and turned on her jets. “It’s all talk, you know. That’s all. He’s just never showed interest in getting to know people and he’s never once mentioned a significant other to anyone... you know how usually that shit just kinda slips out in passing. I don’t know, it’s just an observation.”

“Well now that it’s out, it’s spreading like wildfire. Everyone seems to know now.”

“That’s the fun part of working at Blue Ridge.” She said over the sound of your jets starting up. “Everybody is in everybody else’s business. I’m just surprised that y’all were able to keep it a secret as long as you did.”

“It was more out of fear than anything else.” You started as you looked over at the familiar rumble of a pick up truck and its tires coming up your gravel drive. “He was worried about my job, I was worried about his. Now that people know, it’s like a weight has been lifted off our shoulders.”

“Is that his truck?” You nodded your head and turned the slightest bit to yell at Clark that you were down stairs when he got out of his truck. “Does he live here?”

“We go back and forth between here and his place. We have been slowly starting to throw around the idea of getting a place but it’s still just pillow talk.”

“I swear, you live in that hot tub.” Clark teased as he walked through the side fence.

“Sue me, I’m a mermaid.”

“Got that right.” He chuckled as he came into the screened in porch. “Hello, Sarah.”

“How’s it going, boss man.” She teased. “Or is it baby daddy now?”

“Clark still works just fine.” He laughed as he leaned over the side to kiss your forehead. “I’m gunna go shower and wash this day off me and thank God we have the next two days off.”

“For doctors appointments.” You pointed out. “So many doctors appointments.” With a nod of his head, he said good bye to Sarah and headed inside, while your friend simply shook her head at you.

“Luckiest bitch in the world.” She muttered when she was sure the down stairs door to your house was closed.

“I know.” You laughed with a shrug as you stretched your legs out under the water and got even more comfortable in front of your jets. “He’s a heaven sent angel for sure. That man has the patience of a saint to put up with all my crazy.”

“Yea, and we both know how much crazy that is.” She laughed, which made you pout and splash some water in her direction.

“I’m serious though. He puts up with me and helps me not spiral out of control better than my own mother can. I seriously have no idea how or why he has stuck around this long...”

“Because you are worth it, (Y/N). You are worth this happiness I can actually see in your eyes. You deserve to be happy just like the rest of us... well, not me. I’m a piece of shit.”

“And you have Larry.” You pointed out as you turned in your chair to grab your bottle of water off the side.

“Two fucked up sides to the same coin.” She laughed, whole heartedly. “God, I love that man. Pain in my ass, and I definitely don’t deserve him, but I love him for loving me all the same. We should all grab dinner sometime. Like a...”

“If you say ‘double date’ to me right now, I will drown you, pregnant or not.”

“Spoil sport.”

——

“So I’ve been thinking...”

“Oh that’s a dangerous thing to do.” Clark teased as he got ready for bed later that night.

“Maybe it’s time to revisit us moving in together and buying a house.” Your boyfriend actually froze half way through taking his under shirt off and stared at you as you looked away from your Facebook feed and up at him through your lashes. “Save money before the baby comes and all.”

“So you wanna buy a house to save money.” He laughed as he took off his shirt and tossed it in the laundry basket. “What brought this on?”

“Well.” You breathed as you turned off your phone screen and rolled over onto your side to face him. “Sarah asked if we were living together when she saw you pull up and I told her we were just talking about it, but the only reason I have been hesitant about it was because of work but since work knows, there really isn’t an issue anymore so there isn’t any reason not to now, right?” He nodded his head slowly as he put his folded jeans on his dresser for the morning and sat down on his side of the bed facing you.

“You know that I have wanted to move in with you for months.” He started as he reached out to put his hand on your hip. “So I am beyond excited at the idea of this actually happening. But I want to make sure that you are ready for this and not just jumping into it because you think its gunna make other people happy.”

“No, I know.” You agreed as you scooted forward so you were a little closer to him. “I have wanted to live with you since you asked me to. I know it’s a big step and yes, its already stressing me out, but I know that at the end of it all, I will be with you. And that’s all I want. I just want to be with you. You make me so happy, more than I’ll ever deserve. And I know that it’s time to take the next step in our lives together. Besides that, we can’t really start our family living in two different houses, one of which is with my mother...”

“OK, well that is another thing we need to discuss.” He said as he leaned over so that he was propped up on the bed behind you with his elbow but still partially laying on your legs. “Because I already know you well enough to know that your mother is a big part of your support group and moving you too far away from her isn’t going to work for both of your sakes. She needs you as much as you need her...”

“OK...”

“And there aren’t many properties in this area for sale right now. Trust me, I’ve been keeping an eye on it for a few months.”

“Of course you have.” You giggled as you propped yourself up on your hand to see him a little better.

“But, there are two different plots of land, one across the street and one a little ways up the road that are up for sale and are pretty cheap. We could possibly build a house...”

“We could... And there’s also the bottom of mom’s property...”

“What, in her yard?”

“No, the neighbor’s old garden.” You replied a you gestured in that direction. “Mom made that comment when we first moved up here, of me possibly building down there so she’s a little less alone on the mountain. If that’s not too crazy of an idea to you, we could talk to her and see if she’s still ok with something like that and maybe see if she would sell us that land. Maybe, I don’t know...”

“Honestly, knowing you as well as I do, that would be the best case scenario here.” He agreed.

“That’s not weird for you?” He smirked and shook his head as he moved his hand enough to rub your back.

“Baby, I love you. And I know that family is important to you. I knew a long time ago that we’d be living near your mother and I don’t have an issue with that now, like I didn’t when I realized that. I like your mom, she’s funny...”

“Oh, don’t ever let her hear you say that.” You laughed as you reached down to run your fingers through his dark curls.

“And I know she respects boundaries enough that it’s not going to turn into an ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’ situation. But we need to talk to her. And we need to really think about this and make sure building a house is something we wanna do right now. It takes a while to do, and there’s a chance, even if we start on Monday with talking to the city and getting the ball rolling, we might not be in the house before the baby is born... You’ve stopped listening, haven’t you?”

“No, I’m hearing you.” You said through your giant smile. 

“No you’re not.” He laughed as he sat up and gave you a chaste kiss. “We’ll talk to mom after your morning appointment.”

“You’re way to good to me.” You sighed as he got up to brush his teeth for bed.

“I’m just treating you like you deserve, sweetheart. That’s all.”

——

“OK, scale of one to ten.” Clark said behind you as you walked through your almost finished house, making sure all the details were exactly right like you did every night you got home from work. “How badly do you crave a trip to Disney?” You stopped and looked back at him before gesturing to the Disney character drawer pulls that you had put on the drawers of the dressers in your closet, and the Star Wars ones in your bathroom.

“Really?” You asked as you gestured toward the guest bathroom, that was going to be finished to look like the hallway in the Haunted Mansion, and the stacks of boxes in the master bedroom behind him of the collection of Disney things the pair of you had collected over the years. “Really?”

“So like a four?”

“Like a ten million.”

“Enough to wanna go on a short baby moon in a few weeks?”

“Is that why I was approved for my paid time off days that I never requested off?” You giggled as you turned turned back to the closet to look at the painting that got finished in there today. He laughed whole heartedly behind you and nodded his head behind your back.

“I thought I beat the response on that and we gotta use them anyways or we lose them. Hey...” You paused your inspection and turned around with your hands on your bump and your back, and he smiled and pulled you toward him by your shirt. “Let’s go to Disney for a bit. The house is close to being done, you haven’t found a single issue with it in the the last seven months, and I think we should just relax for a few days while we still can. Before Wendy comes...”

“Her name is Evangeline.” You countered with a smile. “The sooner you accept that...”

“Yea, yea, yea.” He chuckled, knowing that your daughter’s name was going to be Evangeline (since he picked it out in the first place), but just wanting to pick on you to see the cute annoyed face you gave him every time. “I’m still partial to Tegan...”

“Then you shouldn’t have given me Evangeline.” You said in a sing song voice as you turned to head back up to your mom’s place for dinner, since your kitchen was not even close to being finished yet. “It’s all your fault.”

“You haven’t given me an answer, sweetheart.”

“Why do we have to wait a few weeks to go?” You asked as you stepped over some boxes of flooring that was waiting to go in your kitchen once the island was installed.

“Because that’s the way it works.” He countered as he helped you squeeze between all of the  cabinets for the kitchen and the bathrooms that were going up later that week when the painters were done. “That’s when I could get a site at Fort Wilderness so we can use your mom’s camper to save us some money...”

“Wait, how are we affording Disney right now? We have so much money tied up in the build...?”

“I still know people working at Disney, sweetheart. So I called in a few favors from people who were more than happy to spare some tickets, let us use their discounts, and spread a little pixie dust on two expecting Disney fanatics.”

“Ok, but even still, it’s gunna cost us...” You tried as you stepped out the front door on to the porch.

“Let me worry about that.” Clark interrupted as he locked the door and you turned back to face him.

“You can’t keep doing that.” You said softly with a shake of your head. “You can’t shut me down when it comes to money anymore. I understand you want to give me the world and you don’t want me to ever have to worry, but that’s not how this works. We’re building a house, and starting a family, Clark. And you can’t take on that financial responsibility alone no matter how long you have saved up for it. You’re not the only one who has. But you have to let me... please. Because otherwise, I will keep canceling orders on things like the paint, and those drawer knobs, and these rocking chairs and rebuying them on my name, on my cards...”

“I was wondering how I had more money in my account than I should have.” He sighed as he sat down on one of the two rockers and gestured for you to sit down as well. “I don’t like it...”

“You don’t have to like it.” You grumbled as you sort of just flopped down after a long day on your feet. “Just like I don’t have to like growing a child. We still gotta do it though.” With one more sigh, he nodded and sat back in his chair.

“I’ve had money for the house for years. Evangeline is throwing me for a bit of a loop, but I um... well I opened another credit card and it’s covering her expenses...”

“Clark, you didn’t have to do that.” You sighed as you leaned to the side the slightest bit to reach out for his hand. “Because you’re not the only one saving money here. And there’s no point in me saving money just for it to gain interest in a bank when it could be used to help us better ourselves by... oh I don’t know, buying a crib and diapers and cute little dresses and sweaters and little baby booties. It can buy those towels I love for the guest bathroom, which, by the way, it already has and they will be delivered on Tuesday.”

“I thought you changed your mind on those and that’s why they were canceled.”

“Nope, just repurchased.” You clarified as you sat back to rock yourself back and forth.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N).” He said softly after a few moments. “It’s just... hard. I was raised to be the man of the house and that leaves me with the burden.”

“And if that’s the case, then I’ll stay at home and parent. But either way, I still have money saved that can help us out here, OK? Money for a house, and a wedding. May even be able to afford a trip to Disney and the baby I’m growing, too. So you are not allowed to take on the burden of our life together alone anymore. Or you can sleep in my mom’s basement while I enjoy our house with Evangeline all by ourselves.”

“Alright, fine. You win.” He breathed with a nod. “You’re going to be the death of me, you know that, right?”

“Oh, don’t you know it.” You giggled as you stood up to head home. “Come on, I’m hungry.”

[bamfdaddio]

X-Men Abridged: 1965

The X-Men, those wackadoodle mutants that have sworn to protect a world that hates and fears them, are a cultural juggernaut with a long, tangled history. Want to unravel this tapestry? Then read the Abridged X-Men!

X-Men 9 - 15 - by Stan Lee, Jack Kirby and Warner Roth

The X-Men’s third year touted one of the most anticipated crisis crossover of the millennium: it’s Avengers vs. X-Men!

fuck you Wasp! You don’t deserve the cover (X-Men 9)

The, eh, the first time around. It’s a little lackluster, but Jean uses her powers to not fall down a hole and the Wasp thinks Angel is just, like, such a babe. The entire fight happens over an entirely avoidable misunderstanding and really serves as window dressing for the actual conflict: Charles Xavier confronting his past. Besides, the kerfuffle with Avengers is easily resolved and does not end with anyone accidentally splitting the Phoenix Force among five hosts or killing Xavier, so that’s a real plus. 

While the superteams face off briefly and ineffectively, Professor X dispatches with some vengeful C-list villain named Lucifer who is such a nobody that I’m still not really sure what his actual deal is (and I know Random’s backstory). Still, he is the reason that Charles is in a wheelchair, though the details remain vague. (I much prefer the version rendered in the First Class-movie where Magneto is the one who paralyses his ex-boyfriend/rival, because it has that big dramatic oomph, but hey.)

i don’t know which one is more unbelievable: Xavier’s dope superchair or the artificial dust devil that, later on, somehow hardens into a prison bubble?! SCIENCE! (X-Men 9)

Speaking of Magneto: he and Toad are abducted by some alien called the Stranger, who is apparently super-duper interested in mutation. (We all know it’s really because he has the hots for our Mags, don’t we?) Magneto disappearing causes the Brotherhood to disband, freeing up Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch to join the Avengers. They do so by mail-in ballot.

i love that sweater on ya, Pietro (Avengers 16)

Magneto’s absence clears the board for some new and exciting villains. One of these is another puzzle piece of Xavier’s past: Cain Marko, the Juggernaut… and Charles’ step brother!

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat (X-Men 12)

Maybe I’m suffering from Stockholm’s, but the two issues introducing the Juggernaut are actually… good? (Despite the unsubtle fact that his first name is Cain.) That first issue establishes the unseen terror of this menace as it approaches the mansion and is barely hindered by the numerous defenses the X-Men have thrown up.

it’s the amazing alliterative angel! (X-Men 12)

Charles, meanwhile, tells the X-Men about his childhood: his mother and father, who both died young, his abusive step-father and his even worse step brother. Xavier was suspicious of his step-father, who might have had a hand in daddy X’s death, and Cain was always envious of Xavier, who did everything better than he did. This comes to a tragic head when a fight between Cain and Charles causes the step-father’s lab to blow up, killing him. Damn. Rough childhood, Charlie.

this player absolutely does not waste any second. get it, you li’l golddiger. (X-Men 12)

Later, during the Korean War, Charles and Cain stumble upon the temple of Cyttorak, a foul demonic deity (also mentioned in Dr. Strange). There, Cain finds this ruby that grants him his unstoppable powers.

Just as Charles is done with expositing his tragic backstory, the Juggernaut arrives at the mansion and a cool fight ensues.,The X-Men, together with the Living Torch, are finally able to stop the Juggernaut by taking off his helmet, the one thing that blocks his psychic powers.

you just had to emphasize that beast worked under your commands, eh? you old glory hog (X-Men 13)

It;s just… really good stuff. Sure, once again, the day is ultimately saved by some mental feat or trick from Xavier, which is getting tiresome. The X-Men themselves always feel like supporting characters to Xavier, rather than main characters on their own. Still, in this fight, they really do feel like a goshdarnit team.

dohohoho antiquated gender roles. (Not pictured: Xavier mindwiping Johnny Storm after he came to the X-Men’s aid.) (X-Men 13)

One more odd thing I noticed is this utter belief that science and machines can really do anything as long as you set your mind to it. It’s very much the Jetsons: sixties sci-fi.

Still, overall, there’s a noticeable uptick in the quality of storytelling: Lee is really finding his groove. Perhaps that’s the reason that in 1965, the X-Men-series goes from bi-monthly to monthly. Clarion call!

hank mccoy introduces: the most verbose way to say “duh” (X-Men 14)

In other news, Jean and Scott still pine for each. It’s absolutely boring.

Oh, Scott, the sheer agony! If only there were practically nothing keeping us apart! (X-Men 9)

oh, Jean, if only my little lieutenant were that gun... (X-Men 10)

Fuck, these two deserve each other. (I promise I’ll like them better later on.) But hey, at least Jean gets an upgrade in terms of power level!

obvi the best use of telekinesis ever (X-Men 9)

much better. attagirl (X-Men 14)

Other new mainstays are 

The Savage Land, where the X-Men meet discount Tarzan, Ka-Zar, and his pet tiger.

Actual continuity! Stories that span multiple issues!

The Trask family, starting with the misguided patriarch Bolivar. .

And… the Sentinels.

The appearance of the Sentinels really ratchets up the anti-mutant hysteria. The only reason Dr. Trask built these things is because he’s deadly afraid of mutants. When he presents them on national television, they immediately kidnap him and Xavier. I love that the Sentinels take about one hot second to turn against their creators, because humans will never cease bringing ruination upon their own heads.

“humans are dumdums” - fuck you too, you brave little toaster ovens (X-Men 15)

About 60 years later, at least that hasn’t changed.

PANIC! this whole page is just a delight. please note the spelling of ‘throughout’ (X-Men 14)

Didn’t you take Art History? Just like Lee, Kirby is really stretching his legs.

life, uh... finds a way (X-Men 10)

Best new character: The Juggernaut. Cain Marko is different kind of villain: for him, this is personal. He poses a legitimate threat and he fleshes out Xavier’s backstory. Perhaps the best villain yet. (I’m sorry, Magneto, but at this point you’re little more than a highly dramatic demagogue. You don’t even have your name or tragic past yet!)

What to read: 12 and 13, the issues introducing Cain Marko. Seriously, they’re good. 

Best unintentional period piece: Let me introduce you to: the sixties.

i don’t know what’s happening, but this is just groovy, baby, yeah (X-Men 14) 

Ugliest Costume: The Sentinels. Jesus Christ.

maybe they just hated Bolivar because he made them look this way (X-Men 14)

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Facing the Unknown

Characters: Spencer Reid x Winchester!Reader, Jennifer Jareau, Derek Morgan, Castiel, Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, demons

Word Count: 3,583

Warnings: supernatural/criminal minds crossover, angst, fluff, nothing too bad

Summary: A case pops up to the infamous BAU city. Demons doesn’t mix well with real FBI agents, but you manage to save them all just fine.

Squares Filled: crime scene for @cmbingo // flattery will get you nowhere for @as-the-saying-goes-bingo // bleeding through the bandages in @badthingshappenbingo // enochian for my first heaven and hell bingo card // case fic for @heavenandhellbingo​

Author’s Note: If you have any requests, please send them in! this is unbeta’d and every mistake is all on me.

Feedback the glue that holds my writing together

Tags at the bottom

You can figure out a lot of things: why you don’t have the body you really want (you love pizza too damn much), why Dean doesn’t like to talk about his feelings (daddy issues), why Sam drank demon blood (Ruby made him do it), and why you can’t ever stop hunting (there will always be monsters). The only things you can’t figure out are angels and demons, more so the former.

Out of all the monsters you’ve dealt with, angels are the worst. They have a tendency to stick their noses in everyone’s business whether they are involved or not. Demons have a reason to do the exact same thing: they are spawns of Satan himself so they love to cause trouble and chaos. Angels just do it because they have nothing better to do. The only angel you like is Castiel, and even then it’s 50/50.

You’ve learned to love hunting. You know you’re going to spend the rest of your life doing it, so you may as well get along with the lifestyle instead of fighting it. Sam and Dean have learned the same lesson as you, so you’re not fazed when Sam says, “so get this”. You’ve adjusted to spending a few hours dedicated to sleep that having back to back hunts don’t even faze you anymore. However, this hunt, this specific hunt, has already drained your batteries and you’ve just started.

You stare at the dead body in front of you inside the morgue. There are three dead bodies with Enochian carved into their skin. Each of them is males and each of them has the same symbol on their chests. Castiel swears the angels have nothing to do with what’s been happening in this small town. Only men have been dropping dead for no reason. The angel thinks the demons are responsible for it, but you don’t know why they are carving Enochian symbols on their chests. They must be getting ready for some kind of ritual or spell, but Castiel doesn’t know what kind of ritual or spell that would need Enochian symbols on humans.

“How many more people have to die for us to understand what these demons are doing?” you ask with a sigh.

“This symbol means to summon death,” Castiel informs.

“Summon death? What, they can’t use speed dial? What do they want with Death?” Dean asks.

“If I knew that, then we would be able to stop them,” Castiel says. “However, the demons aren’t showing themselves until it’s too late. If we are going to try and stop them, then we need to get inside their heads before they make their next move.”

“Well, we have pictures of everything, so I say we grab some take out and beer, and think about this at the motel,” you suggest.

“I second that,” Your eldest brother grins.

“Shotgun!” you yell as you race to the car.

“Hey!” Sam scoffs.

“Sorry Sammy, you snooze you lose!” you stick your tongue out at him and get in through the passenger side.

After everyone is in, Dean peels out of the parking lot and heads straight to the best burger joint in this city. Something you and your brother like to do is to scope out the best burger places before starting the case. You’d cruise with him throughout the town and gather intel from the locals before trying the top three. The best, so far, has been Joe’s Burger Joint that has the juiciest meat you’ve ever tasted. You’ve begged the owner to give you the recipe so that Dean can make it back at the Bunker. However, he hasn’t given it up just yet.

Once you have the food in your possession, Dean heads back to the motel room. Castiel doesn’t eat (that’s another thing you couldn’t figure out) so he just sits on the bed while you and your brothers take up the small tab;e by the window. He’s staring intently at the pictures while you eat your burger. The TV is on a news channel, but it’s at a low volume so it’s not too distracting. You thought it was a good idea to put it on in case there might be another death regarding your angelic symbols.

“I can’t believe you don’t like meat, Sammy,” you groan after swallowing the delicious bite.

“I do like meat. I just don’t treat it like it’s going out of style,” he says in disgust as you and Dean scarf down your food.

“More for us,” Dean says with his mouth full.

It’s all smiles and jokes now until you get a glimpse at the TV. On the news is a headline stating there has been another body. However, it’s all the way across the fucking country. All the deaths so far have been in Texas, so why is there a new one in Virginia?

“Guys, look,” you state once your mouth is clear of food.

All heads turn to the TV and you turn it up.

“FBI officials have stated that the recent deaths in Texas may be linked to the newest one. Authorities haven’t commented on what’s been going on, but that doesn’t stop the public from speculating. There are a bunch of questions still left to be answered, so all we can do now is wait. Jim, back to you,” the female reporter states.

“Why are they targeting people in Virginia now?” you wonder.

“Maybe we’ve been looking at this wrong. Maybe it’s not the town they are interested in, but the people,” Castiel says.

“Let’s hope that by the time we get there the FBI hasn’t already contaminated the crime scene. I may act like one, but they are the real dicks,” you scoff.

“I can get us there in a few seconds if you prefer,” Castiel stands up.

“That’s one of the very few good things about you,” you smile. “No offense.”

“None taken.”

“Okay, let’s get this show on the road,” Dean declares.

Dean made Castiel bring baby along since he didn’t want to be thousands of miles away from her. It was a lot harder to conceal a big fucking car as it appears out of thin air, but Castiel picked a good spot to go to. The crime scene isn’t that far from where you are, and you’re thankful you got dressed in your FBI get up before leaving. You know you’ll be here for the rest of the night, so you went online and bought two rooms at a small hotel that’s near the crime scene. One for you and the other one for your brothers. Castiel doesn’t need one since he doesn’t sleep. It’s best to think ahead.

Dean rushes over to the crime scene which is thankfully still intact. A handful of FBI agents are still inside, but it looks like most of the general population has lost interest. There is only one standard FBI car in the driveway, so you’re not too worried about having to trick only a few of them. Your surrogate dad is only a phone call away if these guys question who you are. You get out of the car and make your way inside.

“When I said that the FBI are dicks, I forgot to mention hot because damn, he is fine,” you whistle lowly to your eldest brother when you spot a very attractive agent in the room.

He has brown curly hair that looks a little messy, but a put-together messy. He’s very tall but not as tall as Sam. He’s probably the same height as Dean. You can’t hear what he saying to his fellow agents, but you can hear the sound of his voice. It’s not deep at all, but it does make your knees weak. You have never seen a more perfect human being on this planet. If things go south, then you’ll be sure to protect him.

“Keep it in your pants, sister,” Dean grumbles just as one of the agents noticed the newcomers.

“Who are you?” a black man asks as he reaches for his gun.

He, the very attractive man, and a petite blonde woman all stare at you, the angel, and your brothers.

“This is a closed crime scene,” the blonde woman says.

“We’re agents Barry Young, Frank Bartley, Madison Grey, and Jason Brown. We’ve been sent here to check out the crime,” you state and show them your badges as does everyone else.

“We weren't informed of another team coming down here. You mind if I speak to your supervisor?” the black man asks.

“Sure,” you say and hand him Bobby’s card.

He takes it and steps off to the side.

“Who are you guys?” you ask.

“I’m Jennifer Jareau, that’s Derek Morgan, and this is Dr. Spencer Reid. We’re from the BAU right here in Quantico” the blonde says.

“Ooh, the cute one has a cute name. And he’s a doctor,” you grin.

“Excuse me?” Spencer stutters.

“You’ll have to excuse her. She can’t seem to put a cork in it,” Dean chuckles.

“What?” you scoff and turn to Spencer with a sweet smile. “So, what are you a doctor for?”

“It’s PhDs, actually. Three of them, not a medical one.”

“So, if I collapsed right here and now, you wouldn't give me mouth-to-mouth?” you pout teasingly.

“I know CPR,” he mutters and you just smirk.

“You’re cute when you blush,” you comment and turn to Jennifer. “I hope he’s not your boyfriend.”

“No, I’m married,” she chuckles.

“Do you have a girlfriend, doctor?” you ask.

“No,” he chuckles.

“This must be my lucky day then,” you grin.

“Flattery will get you nowhere,” he states.

“Then I guess I’ll have to work extra hard for your attention.”

“I don’t know who you guys think you are, but you’re not FBI,” Derek says when he steps back into the room.

Both Jennifer and Spencer tense when they realize you’re pretending to be FBI agents.

“That’s a federal offense, do you realize that?” he says with a hard glare.

“Look, we can explain,” Dean starts to say.

However, every single light in this house turned off, shrouding you eight in complete darkness. The only light available is coming from the moon outside.

“Are there more of you?” Derek demands to know and takes out his gun.

“They’re here,” Castiel says.

“The demons? Why?”

“I’m not sure. We’re on their territory.”

“Okay, listen,” you turn to the real FBI agents. “We’re not FBI, but we are going to save your life if you listen to what we say. These bodies that have been turning up are because demons are carving Enochian symbols on these people’s chests. We don’t know why, but they’re up to something big. So, for your safety, listen to what we say,” you explain quickly.

“Like hell we’re taking orders from you,” Jennifer growls.

“Castiel,” a demon says from the corner of the room where the body is. “Surprised to see you here.”

“You’re carving Enochian symbols. Of course, I’d be here.”

“Where did he come from?” Derek demands.

“Okay, we need to go. Please, just follow me,” you urge and grab Spencer and Jennifer’s wrists.

You drag both agents to the door but stop short when another demon pops up.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he chuckles and walks inside.

“This battle is between you and me. Let them go,” you glare.

“I don’t think so,” he growls.

He clenches his right hand into a fist, and your throat starts to close up. He raises you off the ground using his demonic powers, and you have no choice but to take it.

“You see, we have a few more people to claim as our own, but I can see you brought us some toys to play with,” he grins maliciously.

“How is he doing that?” Spencer whispers to his colleagues.

“Go to hell,” you bite back.

“Been there, done that. But I’ll send you,” he laughs and throws you across the room and into the dining room table.

“Leave her alone!” Spencer yells and raises his gun at the man. He shoots him in the head, but it does nothing. The host inside the body is already dead. “What the hell?”

The demon uses his powers to lift all three people and throw them in the same direction as you. They collide with the wall in a loud thump.

“No!” you grunt and force yourself to your feet.

“What the hell is that?” Derek yells.

“A demon! I wasn’t lying before. They’re here for the body. My brothers and I are hunters. We deal with this shit all the time. Come on, follow me!” you urge and help them up.

They don’t argue with you after seeing what just happened. You lead them to the kitchen and rummage through the cabinets until you see the salt. You grab a few containers and gather the agents to the middle of the room. You begin to pour a circle around their feet despite them yelling at you to tell them what’s going on.

“Just stay in here! Do not pass over the salt line. They can’t get you in here. I promise,” you beg.

“That’s not going to stop me from getting to them,” the same demon grins from the door.

“Dean!” you yell.

“We’re kind of busy!” he shouts back, but the shout turns int a groan at the end.

There must be more demons now than the two that showed up.

You reach behind you to take out Ruby’s knife since you’re the one who holds onto it. Your dad trained your brothers how to shoot guns, and he trained you how to fight with a knife. You know how to shoot guns, but your specialty is knives, so Sam trusted you with Ruby’s knife. You barely have a grip on the handle when the demon flings you across the room and into some cabinets. You feel something pierce your side, and you look back to see the knife block containing the kitchen knives have fallen. One fell right int your side, but you have to ignore the pain if you’re going to help the agents. Spencer starts to move out of the circle, but you put your left hand up to stop him.

“No! Don’t leave the circle!” you yell and yank out the knife.

“I can make you come out, you know,” the demon chuckles as his eyes turn pitch black.

“Get the hell away from them!” you yell.

You grab one of the kitchen knives and throw it at the demon. It lands right in the middle of his back, and he just sighs and turns to you. You grab some paper towels and press them against your wound, using the waistband of your pants to keep it in place. Spencer’s eyes widen when he sees the man isn’t affected by the knife in his back. You reach for Ruby’s knife and reveal it, twirling it in your hands.

“You can’t get rid of me that easily,” you grunt.

Your wound is bleeding profoundly, but you’ve lost more blood than this and still could fight. You’re going to be okay.

“I wasn’t trying to, but maybe I should,” he growls.

He runs at you, and you swipe the knife across his arm as you pass by him. He yells out in pain, but that only makes him angrier. You almost slide right into the salt circle, but Spencer reaches out to stop you before you had a chance to ruin it. Without saying anything else, you charge at the demon once more and pounce on his back. He struggles to get you off him, but you’re not in the mood to play games. You swing the knife right into his chest, and he cries out in pain. His entire skeleton glows bright orange as he dies, and he collapses to the ground like dead weight.

“Dean!” you yell.

“We’re okay. We took care of them. One of them got away with the body, but the rest are dead,” he says as he, Sam, and Castiel walk into the kitchen.

“You guys came come out now,” you whisper as you fall back into the kitchen table.

Spencer rushes over to you and lifts up your shirt to see your blood staining the paper towels.

“We need to get you to the hospital.”

“No. There are too many dead bodies here. I’ll be fine.”

“You’re bleeding out, Madison.”

“My name is Y/N Winchester. It’s only fair that you know,” you cough.

“Come here,” Dean says and helps you sit on the table.

“Is she going to be okay?” Jennifer asks.

“I’ll heal her,” Castiel says and walks over to you.

He presses two fingers to your forehead, and your wound disappears. Your side is only bloody from your blood, but the wound is gone. Spencer, Derek, and Jennifer back away slowly.

“That’s not possible,” she says.

“It is. You’ve just been living inside a bubble for your entire lives. You deal with serial killers and human predators. We deal with the supernatural and monsters. We’re not so different. Those were demons and they’ve carved angelic symbols into the victim’s chests. Castiel is an angel. Monsters do exist, but you don’t have to worry about that because we take care of it. I’m sorry we brought the battle to you,” you reveal.

“What are we going to tell Hotch?” Derek asks his team.

“Tell him or don’t. I wouldn’t. The supernatural isn’t something that needs to be broadcasted. If people find out, then they panic, and panic and chaos are made for monsters. People become vulnerable. If you want to know more about how you can help or if you want to determine if your case is human or not, then we’ll tell you more, but leave the supernatural to us.”

“Come on, we got to go,” Dean urges.

“I’ll take care of the bodies,” Castiel says and touches the dead one on the kitchen floor.

He disappears with the body and all three agents jump back from shock.

“I’ll be right there,” you say to your brothers.

“Good luck with this one,” he scoffs at Spencer before taking his leave with Sam.

“I need to call Hotch anyway and tell him why we’re going to be late,” Derek says and leaves as well.

“I’m going to go with him,” Jennifer smiles and exits the kitchen so it’s just you and Spencer now.

“It’s a shame that I won’t have more time trying to woo you, but here’s my number. Call me whenever you’re curious,” you say and hand him one of your cards.

“I can’t believe this is all real.”

“Believe it gorgeous. The world is a scary place. You know this because humans are ruthless. Monsters are worse. Don’t let it get to you.”

“How long have you been doing this?”

“Since I could walk. Don’t waste your tears on me. My family is all sorts of messed up, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t want to see a frown line on that pretty face.”

“Okay,” he chuckles.

“Damn, you really have it all. Great hair, gorgeous eyes, and a stunning smile. You must get all the ladies.”

“It’s less than you think.”

“Well, official count me as one. We have more hunts to do, but we are spending the night in this town. It’d be a shame if I didn’t get to say goodbye to you properly. I’ll be having my own room away from my brothers. I’d hate to spend it alone,” you flirt.

“That’s good to know,” he chuckles nervously.

“I know we just met, but I’d beat myself up if I didn’t do this,” you say.

You grab his cheeks and pull him down to you, placing your lips over his. It’s not weird for you to kiss someone you just met. Meeting guys in bars and playing pool with them does have its advantages. Apparently, this isn’t something new with Spencer because as soon as your lips touched his, his whole demeanor changed. He grips your hair in his hands and kisses you with passion. He doesn’t know why he’s behaving this way to a woman he just met, but there has been fire between you two ever since your initial contact.

His lips move smoothly over yours, and you open your mouth to grant his access. His tongue slips in for a brief moment before you pull away. There are about two inches of space between you two, and you look into his lust-blown eyes.

“You really know how to kiss,” you whisper.

“That’s not the only thing I know how to do.”

“Please come to my hotel room. I bet I can get my brothers to stay an extra day. I’m staying at the Suburban Extended Stay Hotel room 318. Do you need me to write it down?”

“No, I got it,” he shakes his head.

“Then I’ll be waiting,” you smirk and lean up to his ear to whisper to him. “Bring your handcuffs.”

You pull away from him with a wink and leave the kitchen. He doesn’t know who you are, but he likes the kind of woman you are. He normally doesn’t go out with women like you, but there is something exciting inside you. He’s definitely going to visit you tonight, and he’s definitely going to make sure you remember him well after you two have already parted ways.

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[tabloidtoc]

National Enquirer, November 9

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Duchess Kate sets the record straight on Prince Harry and Meghan Markle 

Page 2: Ben Affleck is wasting away and friends fear he’s taking his new health regimen too far as the six-foot-four star usually weighs 208 pounds but has shriveled to a spindly 165 -- a nutritionist put him on a sensible meal plan but he’s altered it with his own fantastical ideas such as he won’t go near bread and he’s ditched pasta and he’ll eat cantaloupe and blueberries one day and nuts and seeds the next and he’ll only drink boiled water and green tea for 24 hours then break his fast with a small bowl of quinoa -- instead of pumping iron he does exercises using his own body weight like ten-minute planks -- Ben thinks he looks great but his pals fear he’s traded one addiction for another

Page 3: Love-hungry Katie Holmes is thrilled to have a new man in her life but she’s breaking the bank to keep him happy because Katie is picking up the tab wherever she goes with Emilio Vitolo Jr. because it helps her feel she’s in full control of the relationship but Emilio may be taking advantage of Katie’s generosity because Katie has been showering him with designer clothes and jewelry and even paying for a personal trainer to whip him into shape -- Katie enjoys giving her guy things he can appreciate because he’s made her so happy but she may go broke doing it and it’s not like he doesn’t have any money; he’s worth a cool $1.5 million himself

Page 4: CNN rocked by sex scandal -- Jeffrey Toobin’s sleazy sex scandal has rocked CNN but it’s just the latest in a string of scandals at the network 

Page 5: Axed Fox News anchor Ed Henry fought back against his co-worker’s rape charges in a blockbuster lawsuit by handing the court explicit selfies and texts in an attempt to prove their tryst was consensual 

Page 6: Ryan Seacrest is downplaying his latest shocking absence from Live with Kelly and Ryan but the TV dynamo is battling a mystery illness that may force him to sign off for good -- the co-host who is a well known as a workaholic skipped out on the daytime show for the third time this year and used the coronavirus pandemic as his excuse -- Ryan was suffering badly from flu-like symptoms on the weekend before his absences but came back negative for coronavirus however doctors remain baffled by Ryan’s ongoing battles with exhaustion and weight loss and stroke-like symptoms, disgraced perv Bill Cosby’s latest mug shot shows he’s a shriveled shadow of his former self and the fallen funnyman flashed a maniacal grin while refusing to look into the camera in the picture snapped behind bars in September and he’s unshaven and his hair is ratty

Page 7: Lizzo has embarked on a radical vegan diet and extreme exercise program to save her life -- doctor warned the 350-pound singer that her daily intake of 5000 calories a day was a dangerous path to self-destruction and she needed to change her life or lose it and Lizzo finally got the message and is committed to this program but it’s been a living hell for her 

Page 8: After surviving a fiery crash at the Daytona 500 NASCAR hero Ryan Newman is locked in an ugly $50 million divorce showdown with his estranged wife -- Ryan and Kristina Newman split in 2019 after she was caught having an affair with another man and paying her love $450,000 and now Ryan’s lawyers are trying to freeze Kristina who was once referred to as the First Lady of NASCAR out of his fortune -- court papers reveal the two split in July 2019 when Kristina went to live with her boyfriend U.S. Army Captain Joe Schwankhaus who is the Chief Operations Officer of Kristina’s company VRX USA 

Page 9: Ellen DeGeneres debuted a high-flying pompadour hairstyle on her new talk show but the makeover still doesn’t get to the root of her recent problems and although her hair may be rising her show’s ratings are falling 

Page 10: Hot Shots -- pregnant Kelly Rowland, Andy Cohen took his son Benjamin for a stroll in NYC, Will Smith held court in L.A. while shooting King Richard a biopic about the dad of tennis greats Venus Williams and Serena Williams, Angela Bassett caught a drive-in screening of One Night in Miami in L.A. 

Page 11: Grieving Lisa Marie Presley has broken her silence over the suicide of her beloved only son Benjamin Keough saying her heart and soul went with him sharing her heartbreak on what would have been Ben’s 28th birthday and she added she’s dedicating herself to raising Ben’s twin half-sisters and actress sister Riley Keough, Chaka Khan refuses to duo with Ariana Grande again saying she’s not gonna do a song with no heifer -- Chaka and Ariana worked together in 2019 for the Charlie’s Angels soundtrack

Page 12: Straight Shuter -- DWTS pro Emma Slater kept a handle on her coffee while steering her e-bike (picture), it pays to be Brad Pitt’s girlfriend as his new squeeze Nicole Poturalski has doubled her modeling fees, dancing siblings Derek Hough and Julianne Hough are out of step over her sloppy personal life and his hot new judging career because these two were supposed to be the next Donny and Marie Osmond but his solo career is exploding while hers is falling apart, Madonna has always been a big believer in astrology but now she won’t even meet with people if it’s not written in the stars and she’s spending a fortune to have an army of people read her charts 

Page 13: Losing his beloved son to cancer has sparked new fears for fragile Robert Redford because Robert has struggled with his own health over the years and losing his son to bile-duct cancer is extremely worrying; he’s already frail and this has friends fearing the worst, Jeff Bridges is confident he’ll win his battle with lymphoma by coupling medical care with a strict vegan diet and chanting and spiritual healing techniques

Page 14: Convicted wife killer Scott Peterson may soon walk out of prison and grisly photos lawyers say could set him free -- following years of appeals California’s Supreme Court overturned Scott’s death penalty and now another appeal is forcing a lower court to reexamine his conviction for murdering seven months pregnant wife Laci Peterson and their unborn son Conner -- if Scott gets a retrial his legal team will be allowed to introduce new evidence including crime scene pictures that Scott’s former defense attorney said suggests Laci’s disappearance was an abduction by a satanic cult 

Page 15: Former child star Zachery Ty Bryan of Home Improvement was jailed overnight and released on $8500 bail following his bust for a fight with a galpal at an apartment complex in Eugene in Oregon -- the drama comes on the heels of Zachery’s split from wife Carly Matros the mom of his four kids

Page 16: Ryan Reynolds can’t wait to film a new rom-com with close pal Sandra Bullock but it’s causing tension with wife Blake Lively even though Blake trusts Ryan and would never forbid him from taking this part but the idea of him getting cozy with Sandra again still makes her uneasy -- now Ryan and Sandra are signed up to do The Lost City of D and despite Sandra’s denials they ever had a romance Ryan is gushing about them getting back together 

Page 17: Isolated and overlooked Today show host Hoda Kotb is being bullied off the morning show because of tepid ratings and the absence of former sidekick Kathie Lee Gifford and Mean Girls treatment by co-hosts Savannah Guthrie and Jenna Bush Hager have pushed the disillusioned anchor closer to the door -- Hoda recently filled out paperwork to adopt a third child and she’s clearly putting more emphasis on family than her career and it sends the signal she isn’t happy with her role and is not thinking of Today as her top priority, trainwreck Matthew Perry is holed up in his new Pacific Palisades beach pad  pounding out an explosive tell-all and his former Friends are quaking about what secrets he may reveal -- Matthew wants to rush the book out while interest in the Friends reunion special which was postponed by the COVID-19 pandemic remains high -- he knows an uncensored account of his time on Friends and his drug issues would be a bestseller and he intends to blow the lid off his on-set romances and address rumors he and Jennifer Aniston were more than friends 

Page 18: American Life -- her tall tale: I have the longest legs in the world 

Page 19: Jessica Simpson has been flaunting her body after dumping a shocking 100 pounds but buddies worry the drastic drop in size isn’t natural and suspect she’s been taking diet pills again and they’re worried this could escalate into a big issue

Page 20: Devastated Reese Witherspoon was hit with a depressing double whammy -- the death of her dog Pepper from cancer and the delay of her long-awaited sequel Legally Blonde 3, Hollywood Hookups -- John Cena and Shay Shariatzadeh wed, Ashley Hebert and J.P. Rosenbaum split, Cardi B and Offset on again

Page 21: Bruce Willis is back in another Die Hard but this time it’s a commercial for Advance Auto Parts and Die Hard batteries and it’s a clear statement on the state of his career that Bruce has to revisit his amazing past to make a fast buck in the present, Giada De Laurentiis has been given the green light to get married by her 12-year-old daughter Jade -- Giada has dated TV producer Shane Farley for five years and he’s been living with mother and daughter for five months during the pandemic lockdown which gave Jade a firsthand look at what it would be like to have a new daddy and Shane’s passed the test with flying colors 

Page 22: Cover Story -- Prince William’s heartsick wife Kate Middleton is breaking her silence about the royal family’s tumultuous bitter break with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle to set the record straight and save Britain’s monarchy and she’s tired of all the rumors and lies and backbiting and after all the drama and negativity she wants to get the truth out there and end this unprecedented crisis that’s endangering the monarchy’s survival -- friends are trying to convince Kate to do an official sit-down TV interview about what really happened between once-inseparable William and Harry and how Harry and Meghan tore the family apart even before they moved to America but Kate is resisting because she fears that could backfire like Princess Diana’s TV tell-all about her marriage to Prince Charles 25 years ago -- Kate had to turn the other cheek often after Meghan joined the family and she offered to help Meghan adjust to royal life from the start but Meghan rebuffed her and Kate in tired of Meghan painting her as the bad guy especially when it was Meghan’s antics that tore the family apart -- Kate also is upset that Harry and Meghan are portraying themselves as victims of a world that’s against them while she and William take on a phenomenal workload to cover the responsibilities the Sussexes left and losing precious time with their own three children and it’s hard not to be bitter but Kate is trying to take the high road and forgive Meghan and move forward

Page 26: With their marriage hanging by a thread Tori Spelling fears Dean McDermott will cheat on her again while filming a new TV show in Canada for six months; Tori wanted to bring their 5 children to Canada with him but Dean put her off saying it would be too distracting -- she’s been a jittery mess and he can’t stand to look at her and he only took this job because they need the money, Melanie Griffith is frustrated with Chris Martin and wants him to put a ring on her daughter Dakota Johnson’s finger -- the couple have been dating since 2017 and Melanie’s fed up with waiting for Chris to pop the question -- Melanie began to lose her patience after the couple reunited following a split last June when Chris won Dakota back with promises to settle down 

Page 28: COVID Vaccines: What you need to know

Page 32: Miley Cyrus claimed she once spotted a spaceship over Hollywood and even locked eyes with an alien but she also admits she’d bought weed wax from a guy in a van in front of a taco shop, whiny Kris Jenner is blaming social media for killing off Keeping Up with the Kardashians after it helped the reality TV clan make a mint

Page 34: Ozzy Osbourne is terrified a doll has cursed him -- Ozzy told son Jack Osbourne on their Osbournes Want to Believe show that Robert the doll was responsible for his recent bad luck and failing health, Tom Cruise and his Mission: Impossible 7 team caused chaos at an Italian hospital by filming there during the COVID-19 pandemic -- Tom and his crew including 100 security staffers plus trucks and other equipment descended on the Policlinico Umberto I in Rome for a week and legions of fans also flocked to the filming creating even more commotion in the streets outside the hospital and adding to the bedlam the production commandeered an elevator drawing criticism as hospital staff were treating 140 coronavirus patients with 12 in intensive care -- filming was done in an administrative section of the hospital but still sparked an official protest as well as complaints from trade union members

Page 36: Health Watch 

Page 38: Superhero screen pals of Chris Pratt rushed to rescue the actor’s reputation after he was mercilessly dragged into a silly social media meme when a Twitter user posted pictures of Chris Pratt and Chris Pine and Chris Hemsworth and Chris Evans captioned with the instruction one has to go but a flood of responses slammed Pratt as the worst Chris causing his Marvel co-stars to prop him up such as Zoe Saldana and Robert Downey Jr. and Mark Ruffalo and Jeremy Renner and Guardians of the Galaxy director James Gunn and Chris Pratt’s wife Katherine Schwarzenegger also bashed the social media bullies, Matthew McConaughey kept saying alright alright alright to making romantic comedies until the day he was so fed up he turned down $14.5 million to do another one -- Matthew revealed in his memoir that he didn’t mind making a string of mindless rom-coms because their paychecks rented the houses on the beach he ran shirtless on but he eventually wanted to try something else so he turned down a big payday so he could get more serious 

Page 42: Red Carpet -- Drew Barrymore 

Page 47: Odd List