#buddie just hasn’t been hinted at enough to imply anything will happen there

[seddair]

i feel like people always forget network tv is NOT subtle. shows really telegraph what they're gonna do with respect to relationships.

Exactly! I’ve watched a number of network television shows over the years that had slow burn romances, and pretty much none of them were all that subtle lol. There’s a couple that come to mind that didn’t hint at romance at the beginning (Barney/Robin from HIMYM for instance), but it never took THIS long to get around to it.

Is there a chance they could change course and start telegraphing Buddie? Sure. But it isn’t just gonna happen out of the blue without some pretty obvious hints as to where this is going. Some people might think they’re already there, but they really aren’t at all lol.

[jarofstyles]

"If you let me in, I’m ready to give you what I couldn’t before"

Oh some angst we are 👀👀

warning: implied cheating (in a sense?) angst angst angst

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“If y’let me in, I’m ready to give you what I couldn’t before.”

He wrung his hands as he stood in front of her door. His stomach a mess of anxiety, sweat on his brow, he had realized just how badly he fucked up when her face barely moved. Stoic. This wasn’t his Y/N.

It had started off as simply fuck buddies. Friends with benefits. And it progressed through the months. They did things that friends with benefits shouldn’t. Snuggles and kisses and sweet nothing. Picnics and movie dates and private fluff that really had her believing that they were more than just random fucks.

Harry had wanted to have his cake and eat it too. When Y/N had opened up his phone to some sexting going on back and forth between Harry and some sorority girl, she felt her heart shatter. Seeing him talk about it wanting to taste someone else and wanting to see how tight she was, making plans to see her the day Y/N was going out of town… it had utterly wrecked her.

When confronted, Harry panicked. They had never claimed exclusivity but everything had hinted at it. His idea was that when she was away, he could play a bit and come back to have the soft snuggles and hot sex with her. There was nothing wrong with tasting a few more things, right? I didn’t matter that his stomach didn’t felt right doing it.

His mates had been on his back about the fact he wasn’t dating her and also not taking advantage of being in college. They’d gotten to his head, and he was set up with Stacey and she was good looking, decent enough. She was willing and eager and They’d texted back and forth, Harry not thinking twice about leaving his phone in the bed with Y/N as he went to the bathroom.

When she opened his phone with the few dings it had, she felt like she could throw up.

S: I can’t wait until you come over. I haven’t been fucked in agesssss.

S: honestly? I’ve had my eye on you for a while.

S: I got a set I think you may like. You said you liked red, right? ;)

Attached was a photo of a toned body in a red lace outfit, nipples able to be seen and a bare bottom with a hand covering her cunt.

S: if you can find some time to come sooner… I’ll be waiting. Xxxx

Y/N felt like she couldn’t breathe. Hand shaking slightly as she stood up, grabbing her clothes and hastily putting them on. She was so fucking stupid. So dumb. Harry was like everyone else. And it was her fault for letting this go on as much as it did.

Harry’s brows furrowed as he walked out of the bathroom to see her hastily getting dressed, tears streaming down her face. His heart broke, hating seeing her any type of upset. It was instinct, rushing to grab her and pull her into his body.

“Baby… wha’s happened? What’s the mat-“ he was interrupted by a shove, loosing his balance and falling on to the bed.

“What’s the matter? I’m…. Please, don’t touch me.” She said quietly. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to shove you. But this… it isn’t going to work anymore Harry. I obviously was thinking it was more than this was, and that’s my fault. You stated your opinions and wants and I was fine with that at the time-“ her voice cracked, and Harry’s stomach dropped. What was she talking about? She couldn’t know….

“Your texts. You’ve got a lovely girl named Stacey who has a nice set for you to see when y’go over on the day I leave to go back home for a day.” The bitterness was tasted even on Harry’s tongue, his throat feeling thick as he stood up. She wasn’t supposed to see those.

Shit. Shit. Why did he feel like this, like he had cheated when they weren’t anything? Why did he feel like he wanted to get sick and cry?

“We-we arent exclusive! We aren’t and y’said that was fine, we arent.” He sputtered out, making it worse. Her face dropped and her eyes hit the ground, the silence broken by a sniffle.

“Yeah. We aren’t, I guess. I dunno… when it’s a few months in and you do all those… dates, and y’introduce me to your mum and sister And have me come out every night and call me your girl… it all seemed like more. Everyone keeps askin’ me how long we’ve been dating and I suppose I’m an idiot for saying a few months when…. I jumped the gun and believed that everything you said… that I’m the most beautiful girl and youre so lucky to have me, that I’m the best you’ve ever had…. It’s easy to believe it when you must have so much practice saying it.” She laughed bitterly, throwing her shoes on her feet, throwing Harry’s shirt off and pulling on her own.

It felt like he got punched in the stomach. Realizing how badly he had fucked up, bur his ego wasn’t allowing him to admit it. The technicalities saved him, Didnt they?

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” He said though the tears burned behind his eyes. He refused to show how it was effecting him. Instead of being hit, shoved again, yelled at, she just nodded, shocking him.

“Yeah. I don’t know… I thought… was living in a fantasy land. You were giving me what I wanted but it’s obvious now that you were playing a game. You can’t actually give me what I want. I wanted to be with you.” She pushed the hair out of her face, Harry helplessly sitting on the bed as she gathered her things. The panic was setting in but he didn’t dare make a noise about how the makeup wipes being thrown into her bag tore him apart. She was leaving, leaving.

“We don’t have to- we don’t hav’ta stop, Y/N. Why?” He knew he sounded stupid when her head snapped to him, irritation covering her face.

“I know that my pussy is apparently too good and you continued this whole charade to keep it, but you can’t give me what I want. I want a boyfriend. I want someone to love me and give me those forehead kisses and say those beautiful things you said to me and mean them. You can’t give me that, can you?” The last piece of hope had shattered when he stayed silent, the silence staying around until she slammed the door shut and walked out of his life.

It hasn’t been too long since then, and he knew immediately that he was fucked up. His texts and called remained ignored and unopened. Her friends had told him to fuck off, and he understood. Mitch had smacked him upside the head and he couldn’t stomach the looks Sarah and Evie had given him when they’d found out why Y/N wasn’t tagging along anymore.

So that’s how he ended up outside her apartment door, knocking and speaking through the door. “Please. I’m a fucking idiot, Y/N … I’m an arrogant son of a bitch and I didn’t want to back down but please let me in. I meant ever bring I said to you before then. I haven’t fucked anyone else since you. Please let me in.” His voice broke, resting his head against the cool wood. “Let me give you what you want.”

His breathing caught as he heard the click of the lock.

[sweetcloverheart]

Unpopular Opinion Time

I mean, I whined talked about my thoughts on Ladynoir, might as well talk about the other side of the love square.

I feel with Adrinette, it has the opposite issue that Ladynoir has - because where as the latter seems adamant in never hinting at or showing us what exactly Ladybug would/could think of dating Chat (outside of jokes), the show can’t seem to get enough of shoving it down our throats how in the former, Adrien doesn’t see Marinette as anything other than part of the gang, his heart forever stuck on Ladybug.

I mean, fair is fair in that it’s not like there’s no basis for the behavior - Adrien grew up sheltered, raised in his little bubble with only his dad, Nathalie, Gorilla, and Chloe (and once upon a time, his mother). He’s only just now be given the ability and chance to interact with other kids his age and develop his social skills. Having grown up with those limits, I can reasonably believe that he wouldn’t raise a brow to Marinette crush-induced social anxiety around him and just think of it as simply normal kid behavior, or at least thought so back in the earlier episodes. Marinette doesn’t make things easy on herself either - yeah, she’s tried to confess more than once, but she often ends up being her own worse enemy by either overthinking her plans to confess or chickening out last minute either due to shyness, fear of rejection, or ultimately deciding her superhero duties are more important, playing along with his “just friends” comments despite how heartbreaking hearing that is for her.

And it’s not like there hasn’t been progress - they started the series as acquaintances/classmates, only really interacting based on coincidence or their classmate’s meddling, and have now as of the recent seasons upgraded to actual “friends”. They’ve had ship moments, even when they had tried “moving on” from their crushes on each other(’s secret identities) and dating other people (Which...has it’s own set of problems, but this isn’t about that, so let’s move on). Marinette’s trusted him with a miraculous twice now ( the second time causing her to get taken advantage of with Felix), while Adrien’s compared her to his mother, and even felt close/comfortable enough to confess about feeling trapped and how much he dislikes Gabriel’s controlling parenting in “Risk” (even if you ignore the “under Akuma influence” part). Even if we’re no closer to a confession, I can at least say their relationship has moved up a level compared to “Origins”.

But despite all that, the show just doesn’t seem interested in allowing her to move into his potential partner hemisphere. No matter what Marinette does, what schemes the girl squad cooks up for her, how many ice creams Andre the Icecream dude gives, the amount of “double dates that are obviously double dates” Ayla and Nino bring him on, or how often the class and city proper coos over how they’d make a fine couple - Adrien never gets a clue or is slightly swooned. He’s forever trapped in the endless cycle of seeing Marinette very clear and obvious courting attempts as “just friend” things and her as his good buddy who for some reason constantly gets tongue tied around him and trips on air the minute she make eye contact with him.

And it’s not like Adrien doesn’t understand what it means to be flirted with/crushed on - Chloe is unabashedly open about liking him (and is beyond possessive about it), touching him affectionately and calling him “hers”. And while you could argue that he likely doesn’t view her actions as romantic either due to being childhood friends and therefore seeing her behavior as normal for her, the fact the he shows clear obvious discomfort with her flirting and touches and states such means he seems to know how she feels, or at least that her feelings for him (as a friend or a crush) are prompting the behavior. Similar happens with Lila when she tries to manipulate her way into a relationship with him, and gets flustered when she tries to imply they’re dating in “Volpina” (mostly because he doesn’t want Ladybug thinking that). There’s also Kagami, who was extremely blunt and direct with her feelings towards him. She made it clear she was interested in a relationship with him, and he wasn’t completely ignorant about her intentions. Twice we’ve had him mistakenly think another girl was interested in him romantically as a super hero (”Weredad” and “Rocketear”), and while those were played for laughs and ship drama in the latter’s case he was at least shown to be able to notice (even incorrectly) when someone shows interest in him. He can also tell when someone’s not interested in him, considering his determination to make Ladybug fall in love with him and constantly trying to woo her, and eventually respecting her wishes to stop flirting at inappropriate times and not encourage the citywide shipping of them in “Glaciator 2″ (though we all saw how that went after). We have also been shown that dense as he can be and despite his lack of understanding social cues, Adrien is not stupid - He knows what flirting looks like, he knows what someone being interested in him (supposedly) looks like, and he knows how to have crushes on people. Even if he can’t figure it out and is honest to god fooled by her “pretending” he doesn’t send her heartrate skyrocketing while dismissing her verbal flubs and other people pointing it out, he should have noticed she only acts this way around him and him specifically for a reason at some point.

And yet, confusingly (and often frustrating), he seems to constantly have big fat blinders on for Marinette and her crush on him. Like, no one is being subtle about how she feels about him, least of all the girl herself. Are you telling me it genuinely doesn’t occur to him that Marinette might like him more than a friend/fan after four seasons? And if not that, am I supposed to believe he doesn’t consider her a potential girlfriend in spite of all the time they’ve spent together as civilians? He was okay with and willing to start dating Kagami (who directly pursued him true, but he still said yes) to start moving on from his (assumed) one-sided crush on Ladybug, and honestly believed he managed to charm Marinette and Ayla into having crushes on him as Chat Noir (and was openly shocked about the former since he thought “Chat Noir isn’t her type”, implying he’s aware at least of what type of guy she might like/doesn’t like Chat Noir romantically). He flat out compared her smile to his mother’s even. The fact that he can think these things but not “hmm, my buddy Marinette’s looking cuter than normal recently.” or “Weird, I feel super warm holding hands like this with Mari for some reason...” or even “When I was with Marinette, I didn’t think about my crush on Ladybug at all...” is baffling. His own ex gets to call/think of her as “cute” more than he does!

There’s also the issue of the fact that when we do finally do get to finally see Adrien view Marinette in a romantic light, it’s only after she reveals herself as Ladybug. There’s no conflict about the feelings, no struggle over the fact that his desk neighbor/”good friend” turned out to be his hero partner and the girl he’s been in love with for ages, or even time taken away to internally-debate over if his love is still genuine with this discovery or slowly building up to viewing her the same way he had her superheroine persona - he just jumps straight into dating her, no questions asked. He never considered Marinette a dating option, even when he was actively trying to get over Ladybug, but the minute he realizes she and the object of his affections are one and the same, he immediately transfers the crush over to her, which doesn’t say good things about the ship if the only thing that can get Adrien to even think of Marinette as a potential romantic partner is her being/being related to his crush on Ladybug. At least Mari was allowed/given the time to mull over the Chat=Adrien reveal in “Ephemeral” and actually think about if not liking Chat romantically meant her feelings for Adrien weren’t valid anymore, and even Luka was allowed some minor conflict upon learning Marinette was Ladybug in “Wishmaker” (not that the show makes proper use of it latter). In the two (direct) reveals, Adrien just immediately circumvents any and all awkward feelings he should be having so he can finally get the girl like he wanted, even though he should be thinking about what this implies with his crush being someone he barely paid attention to in the past/recently made friends with. And while you can interpret this as Adrien simply being able to reconcile the fact that both Marinette and Ladybug are the same heart and soul more easier because he sees the similarities more clearly than Marinette does with him and Chat (He did call Marinette “Paris’s Everyday Ladybug after all) and just comes to/start loving and appreciating her more because of it, it also kind of carries this bad implication that Adrien just sees Marinette as a vehicle to fulfill his love for Ladybug since he would have never even thought of dating her until he knew she was the other (and oh boy is this blatant in “Chat Blanc” when you think about how Adrien justified dating her civilian self because of knowing her secret identity while withholding his own)

As stated in the previous post, I get the main ship is supposed to be slowburn. And yes, I can accept a dense love interest (Hell, “Idiots in Love” is one of my of my bread and butter tropes) - but it’s been four seasons and a year in canon! Are you seriously expecting me to believe that in that entire time, Adrien hasn’t once considered either Marinette being a potential girlfriend or even her liking him as a civilian? Even after getting a girlfriend of his own? Even after having to openly “turn down” Marinette in “Weredad” when he mistakenly thought she was in love with him as Chat Noir? Even after her near-accidental “prank” confession and almost kissing him in “Puppeteer 2”? Even after she let him drag her around all of Paris in her pajamas and spent his mother’s death anniversary with him? Even after their fake rehearsal confession/date in “Glaciator 2”? Even with how constantly and often he discusses his crush on Ladybug with Plagg (Who knows Ladybug is Marinette, and so ought to know she’s in love with him with how often he and Tikki hangout in their “off hours” - which in that case should be even more of a reason to tell him that Marinette likes him, or at least encourage him to go after her!)? Even with how unsubtle and blatant their class - hell, entire freaking city of Paris actually, is about how much they ship the two (in and out of costume) and how often the show pulls out “they should totally be dating” and “You make such a cute couple!” and “Those two are meant to be.”!

And it’s not that I hate Adrien slowly building his way from stranger to friend to potential lover - honestly, the scenes/episodes where Adrien and Marinette are able to just effing vibe and be good buddies despite some minor awkwardness without her either being embarrassed eight ways to Sunday because of shipping shenanigans gone wrong or because she’s still not able to exist in the same breathing space as him despite having become “good friends” now is good, because they’re fun interactions and show progress in their relationship growth. I also know that season 5 will likely give us more relationship build up for the two of them and might have Adrien actually think romantically of Marinette without Ladybug being involved. I know the ship is canon and that it’s going to happen eventually - but it doesn’t stop the frustration of seeing all of Marinette’s efforts come to nothing, and sucks the fun out of watching the buildup when the writers come in with a blatant show of how unaffected Adrien is by this development/change/ship-teasing, as if roughly elbowing us while going “LOL look at how dense Adrien is poor idiot still doesn’t get it!”

[quinntheebrain]

Hi there! I was wondering if you could do a jealous bokuto x f!reader (preferably if not then gn! is fine). Like he gets jealous of his bby and kuroo getting along really well... a little too well lmao. Anyways, I hope your day/night is going great ya wonderful person <3

Pairing: Jealous!Bokuto Kōtarō x fem!reader

Warnings: implied alcohol use, a temporarily sad Bokuto, Ummm I curse????

A/N: *deep heavy sigh* I looked over this 1000x lmfao. I’m used to writing fics and not hcs, so they’re probably not the best (I gotta stop doubting myself). I’m always so nervous to share my writings, but this a learning process! Thanks for being my first request. It’s been a while since I wrote anything seriously and shared it. I really hope you enjoy it :) Also, somebody else (who I can’t think of rn) hc that Bokuto doesn’t drink, I just agree wholeheartedly. 

Oh, my precious baby Bokuto. He’s so cute it hurts🥺. 

He gets jealous easily. 

He’s so lively that people naturally gravitate toward him. So, he’s used to being the center of attention. 

Even though the only person’s attention he really cares about is yours.

Bokuto loves the way you look at him when he makes you smile. He loves the feeling of just being in your presence.

So, when he sees you and Kuroo smiling and laughing from across the bar he’s irritated. 

And when the two of you get a little too close for comfort, he’s fuming

...but for some reason, I feel like he wouldn’t say anything

Now, Bokuto would normally shut that shit down instantly.

But it’s Kuroo, his closest friend. He doesn’t want any kind of confrontation. He doesn’t want to cause a scene (I believe Bokuto could beat Kuroo’s ass)

So, he says nothing and instead spends the night alternating between super soft/affectionate and super distant. 

He’ll bring it up in private though. Half-jokingly asking if you’d prefer Kuroo to him. 

And when the conversation turns serious 

Don’t invalidate his feelings, don’t make him feel crazy. (he’ll curl up in a ball and it will be a long time before he opens up to you again)

RE-AS-SUR-ANCE!!!!!!!! He needs it; he will die without it. Please just tell this boy how much you love him. 

And please believe he doesn’t blame you alone. He talks to Kuroo after he talks to you.

Because next time, Bokuto won’t be so nice :)

This is the third time Kuroo has put his arm around you; Bokuto is counting. He watches you from across the room as he holds a conversation with Akaashi; though, at this point, his friend’s words are nothing more than background noise. 

You are supposed to be with them, but once Kuroo challenges you to a drinking contest, Bokuto knows it’s a lost cause. You promise to join him shortly and though he doesn’t believe you, he nods as if he does. Unlike you, and most of his friends, Bokuto doesn’t drink; he just doesn’t like the taste, but he wants you to have a good time. So, he goes to sit with Akaashi by himself but not before leaning down and pulling you into a soft kiss. Bokuto’s large palm caresses your cheek as his mouth moves delicately against your own; It’s quick and gentle, but it’s effective. His lips linger on yours just long enough to leave you wanting more; it’s a reminder that he’ll be waiting for you. 

But, 15 minutes have passed and you’re still glued to Kuroo’s side. 

Now, you’re a giggling mess, teasing one of your boyfriend’s closest friends, who seems to be enjoying the attention a little too much. The rest of their volleyball buddies watch and laugh, most of them far too inebriated to find anything wrong with the way the two of you are interacting. Bokuto, on the other hand, finds everything wrong with it. He watches you with narrow eyes and tightly clenched fists, trying his hardest to keep his composure.

“Your jealousy is showing,” Akaashi smirks at his best friend; Bokuto hasn’t been listening to a word he says. He wants to tease him about it but now doesn’t seem like the time. “Why don’t you just tell them it’s bothering you?” 

“They’re not doing it on purpose,” Bokuto sighs as he unclenches his fists, wiggling his fingers to crack his knuckles. “Besides, there was a time she couldn’t even be in the same room as Kuroo. I’m glad they’re friends now and if I say something I might ruin it.” he looks away from you and instead focuses on the ground. 

“Forget about Kuroo,” Akaashi says, slightly irritated. “What about you? If you don’t talk to her, you might ruin your relationship. You don’t want to harbor resentment toward the one you love,” Akaashi glances at Bokuto, who is unable to reply. They stand in silence for a short time. Akaashi doesn’t want to bombard Bokuto with advice; he knows that sometimes, a few thoughtful words are enough. “Look, it’ll be okay. I have to go.” Akaashi pats Bokuto’s shoulder, leaving him alone to think about the situation. 

Bokuto is truly happy that you and Kuroo have finally learned to get along but deep down, a part of him wishes the two of you never stopped the incessant bickering; part of him wishes that you still disliked Kuroo and he disliked you. Maybe, the petty arguments were nothing but an attempt to mask the attraction you felt toward each other but honestly, that’s what Bokuto would prefer. Because what’s happening now — you and Kuroo openly fawning over each other — is driving him crazy. 

I’m just imagining things, he thinks to himself. Maybe, there is no real meaning to the way the two of you are carrying on; but, watching as Kuroo embraces you in a hug that lingers a little longer than it should doesn’t ease his mind. Your face buried into Kuroo’s chest, his hands pressed firmly against your lower back as he rocks you side to side, it’s a bit more than Bokuto can handle. The thought of you in someone else’s arms so intimately bothers him, and pulling out your phone to take Kuroo’s contact info is the icing on the cake. 

Still, you’d never know how much it affects Bokuto because he approaches you like there’s nothing wrong, and though he tugs you away from Kuroo rather possessively, he does it with the brightest smile. “Alright, ready babe?” He looks down to you with those golden eyes, glimmering with adoration as he places a kiss on your forehead. You nod ‘yes’ quickly. “See you later, bro.” you both wave at his friends once more before the two of you exit the bar. 

A weight lifts from Bokuto’s shoulders as the door shuts behind him; the absence of his best friend shouldn’t put him at ease, but it does. Still, Bokuto has another problem. 

You don’t want to harbor resentment toward the one you love. Akaashi’s words play in his head like a broken record. If he doesn’t settle this now, he never will. His insecurities will continue to fester until he can no longer look at you the same.

“You and Kuroo were pretty cozy tonight,” he fakes a chuckle as he peers at you from the corner of his eye. “I’m glad you two are so close now.”

“Cozy?” you scrunch up your face. You could count the number of times Kuroo touched you on one hand (which was still too many for Bokuto).  You will admit that you spent an unusual amount of time with Kuroo, but he’s more entertaining when he’s drunk; it’s actually your favorite time to be around him. “Hardly. If anything,” you pause, “Wait a minute. Ko, are you jealous?” you manage to suppress your smile, but there's a hint of amusement in your tone. 

He doesn’t answer your question; it’s embarrassing enough to even be feeling this way and for you to call him out so quickly only makes it worse. He takes a deep breath, “Y/N,” Bokuto’s voice is barely above a whisper. “Do you ever think you’d be better off with Kuroo? I mean the two of you actually have a lot in common, and I just think-” the words sound crazy now that he’s finally saying them out loud. 

“No,” you say sternly and confidently, cutting off your boyfriend before he has the chance to ramble on. It’s reassuring how quick you are to shut the notion down. “Besides, we really only have one thing in common,” you pause in your tracks, forcing Bokuto to stop and look at you. 

“What’s that?”

“We both love you so much,” you can’t help but smile as you speak. Bokuto has such amazing people in his life and that warms your heart. “We would never try to hurt you; I would never try to hurt you. I’m so sorry for even making you feel like that.” the apology is sincere. Your glossy eyes are a giveaway. “If I haven’t made this clear, you are the only one for me. It’s you and me, together forever,” he wipes away a single tear; you hadn’t even realized you were crying. You never wanted to make him feel this way; he’s never sounded so defeated. Was he going to just hand you over to his best friend? Did he think you would accept that? “But really, Kuroo?” you pretend to vomit to lighten the mood. It makes you both laugh, something you desperately needed. 

“I love you,” Bokuto sighs in relief.  

“I love you too.” flinging your arms around his neck, you kiss him. 

There’s something almost enchanting about the way he immediately takes the lead. He doesn’t care about the taste of liquor that lingers in your mouth or the fact that you still smell like Kuroo’s cologne; at this moment, Bokuto only cares about you. His lips glide over yours passionately, yet ever so gently; your tongue sporadically teases his bottom lip, his teeth occasionally nibble on yours. It’s a steady rhythm that makes you weak in the knees. His hands find their way to your waist, then to your back, sliding down until they’re secure in your back pockets. 

Bokuto pulls away, pressing his forehead against yours. “Let’s get home, yeah?” he squeezes your ass before he removes his hands from your pocket; intertwining his fingers with yours, Bokuto starts to walk again. 

“Yeah,” you repeat with a smile on your face, nodding eagerly as he pulls you down the sidewalk. 

[lotusthekat]

Can you hear me, Major Tom?

Fandom: Steven Universe

Rating: G

Relationships: Lars & Steven; MINOR - Lars & Off Colors

Characters: Lars Barriga, Steven Quartz Universe; MINOR - Off Colors; MENTIONED - Martha and Dante Barriga

Summary: Lars never minded fireworks. They were always beautiful and maybe even the hope of a better year.

But never was he aware just how... loud they really are.

Word count: 1.728

AO3

A/N: It’s time for Lars Suffering :) (but don’t take this as torture or anything)

TRIGGER WARNINGS - flashback, PTSD, implied canonical character death, panic attack and fear of death

--

It’s finally the end of that chaotic year. Lars never imagined he’d make it in time.

The beach is filled with plenty of gems – those who were… uncorrupted, according to Steven. Most had been gone for thousands of years, and only now could they see the light of day again. Lars can’t imagine how confused they must be, though many seem excited for the fireworks tonight.

There are far more people at the beach this year, as not many folks tend to show up. Lars himself hasn’t been there since he was, like… 12. When he wasn’t ashamed of showing at the beach as his true self, alongside his parents.

And today, Lars is with Mom, Dad and his new gem friends. His parents were the ones who suggested the Off Colors could go along with them, and while it’s not really a surprise, Lars is glad they’re so welcoming of the gems… and himself.

After everything that happened, Lars is just grateful he’s home again. He’s glad he can share this moment with the Off Colors – his family –, to celebrate their freedom and more hopeful times, now that the Diamonds and Steven have chosen to work together to reconstruct everything.

“… you just gotta count with everyone else, okay?” Lars explains to his friends.

“That’s how we activate the ‘fireworks’?” Rhodonite asks.

Lars snorts, “It’s not a voice command, Rhodonite. People organize them.”

“Who does it, then?” Rutile wonders.

The pink boy opens his mouth but pauses for a few seconds. “The mayor, I think. But that doesn’t matter now – you just follow my lead, alright?”

“Yes, Lars!” The gems respond in unison, not calling him ‘captain’ this time. At least they’ve been getting it, now that they’re not in outer space anymore.

The countdown begins. The Off Colors are still a little lost, but they repeat the same numbers as he does, and eventually do it themselves (well, except for Padparadscha, but she’s excited, nonetheless).

“… Three!”

“Two!”

“One…!”

The cheers and hugs commence, and the show of bright lights and loud pops fill the sky. Humans and gems alike celebrate.

But for some reason, they’re… suddenly so far away from him.

Because eventually, there’s only the fireworks obfuscating the night sky.

It’s colorful and acute, and immense – as immense as the black outer space and the sea.

It’s so flashing.

And then

it all fades into nothing.

Loudly, and then… quietly.

And it happens all over again.

It explodes and fades away, but the noises are sudden.

Like bombs,

or killing robots.

 Lars stares back.

He doesn’t cry, nor does he run away.

He listens as if he’s being forced to.

The colors hurt his eyes, yet he doesn’t look away at all.

Until one particular bomb is too close, and so his eyes rush over his friends.

There’s nobody.

Are they…?

Kaboom!

Lars cowers in the ground, putting his arms over his head. What can he do? Run? Fight back? He should save the others!

How? How? How?

He shakes his head repeatedly, hands over his ears so he doesn’t hear the noises. Useless. Useless.

He’s a coward again.

It doesn’t end.

It will never end.

The explosions only feel closer, and they’re going to get him.

Please, no, no, no

I’m sorry

Stop

Stop

Please

Please

 He hears… something else, though. Somehow.

Amid the battlefield he’s trapped in, there’s someone approaching. Slowly. Calmly. Something about them… he senses as much as the explosive noises.

Lars does have enough in him to look up a bit.

It’s a familiar black curly hair, shaped like a star and also a rose. That together form one uniqueness you could never forget.

Steven doesn’t try to talk. Not that Lars could hear him, though.

The younger boy approaches with something in his hand…

Headphones?

Not those you listen to music with, no.

Lars tentatively gazes back at Steven, words not coming to him right now. Lars has so much he wants to say, but his mouth won’t open, not with the awful taste in his throat. It tastes like metal.

Steven seems to get it. He makes a gesture at the headphones. Lars hesitates for a moment, yet he eventually nods.

He soon uncovers his ears, but it’s not too long until they’re enveloped by absolute silence.

Then he’s…

Lars is back.

The pink teenager is at the beach with everyone else. Except his parents and the Off Colors stand far from him, whereas Steven is the only one close. They’re all worried and scared for him. Lars can tell the fireworks are still happening in the distance, but it’s the least of his concerns now.

He feels awful. Stupid.

Lars never once minded the fireworks. Okay, maybe when he was very little, but he eventually grew out of it.

And he was ready this time. He was so excited for this new year to come. Yet here he is, trembling like crazy in front of everyone.

There is a quiet touch.

Steven’s hand has reached his shoulder, but it’s ready to release it if necessary. Steven doesn’t look terrified at all. If anything… he looks sympathetic, a gaze that’s way too knowing for someone so young.

Even so, the fourteen-year-old smiles sadly and makes another gesture. It’s very simple, but Lars understands its suggestion.

While unsure and embarrassed, Lars accepts it again.

Steven talks to everyone else, words unbeknownst to the pink boy. Lars is taken far from the beach, far from the battle, the cracks and kabooms that would brighten the sky still.

They walk away, until that light no longer reaches them.

The boys have reached a small public square, the same one Lars used to play so long ago, when nothing would concern him. It’s, admittedly, a place he feels safe in. The fireworks are nowhere to be found.

They sit by the concrete surrounding the trees, cold as the breeze of the winter. Lars has his hands buried in his pockets, no longer needing to protect himself. Steven has a supporting hand soothing one of his arms, velvet glove contrasting the certain roughness of Lars’ coat.

They stay away for long, longer than Lars could really count.

It’s then that Steven taps him and says without words that the fireworks have finally stopped, which allows Lars to listen to the world around him again.

He takes off the headphones, flinching as he subconsciously expects the explosion to catch him… but that’s not what happens.

Lars sighs in relief and shame, though he returns the object to Steven.

“Thanks, man,” he mumbles.

“Yeah, don’t worry.”

Lars nods but doesn’t meet Steven’s eyes for now. Steven sits by his side, not pushing him to spit it out. Lars thinks about the other’s readiness to help without words, and to bring him to a quiet place, probably having to interrupt his precious time with his own family… not to mention the familiarity Steven shows in this entire situation.

At the same time it worries Lars in some sense – because a fourteen-year-old kid knowing all too well how to handle someone under a panic attack is enough of a warning sign –, the pink teenager also feels some comfort. It’s probably not fair to Steven, but now that they’ve come this far…

“I don’t know what came over me,” Lars speaks lowly, “When the fireworks began, I was…”

He replays the entire episode in his head, as bothersome as it was. He wasn’t at the beach at all. He was…

“… I was there,” Lars resumes, “fighting.”

Steven inhales deeply.

“And I didn’t know what to do. It was all so- so loud and bright, I couldn’t see anything. Or anyone.” Lars stares at his own hands, which might be shaking still, and clenches them into fists. “I thought I was going to… to…”

His tense hands are soothed by the same soft velvet ones. The contact almost scares him.

Steven looks at him back, eyes shining like the sky above, but not in hope. Instead, with the knowledge of the stars.

Lars sighs again. “I wish you hadn’t seen that.”

“Lars…”

The older boy squeezes Steven’s hand back. “I’m sure I scared the hell out of you, huh?”

Steven swallows. “Well, that’s not important right now. You’re the one who fought back there.”

Lars doesn’t object.

“I wish I hadn’t,” he whispers.

Steven’s hands freeze for a moment, until they hold Lars’ a little too tight.

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, buddy.”

Silence.

“I probably freaked everyone else, too, right?”

“Maybe.”

Lars gulps. “I know I should talk to them, but…”

“It’s okay. You can take your time.”

Their hands are warm against one another. Even if Lars’ are always a little colder, there’s the hint of his internal heat with Steven beside him.

“Is this helping?” The younger boy wonders.

“Yeah. Yeah, of course.”

They pause again, except there’s one question wandering in Lars’ head.

“Those are yours, right?” He points at the headphones sitting by Steven’s other side.

Steven nods. “I’ve had them for a while now.” His head lowers as he mumbles, “Fireworks aren’t really my thing anymore.”

Lars already suspected, but he still frowns. “Didn’t you need them?”

“I think you needed more.”

“Steven.”

“Don’t worry, I was fine. But I could tell you weren’t.”

Lars wants to protest because this kid, he swears to God, but he knows it won’t go anywhere. So, he complies and in the very least holds Steven’s hand with the same care; to let Steven know he can count on Lars, too.

They watch the stars from there, the sky a lot more peaceful.

“Do you want me to stay longer?” Steven asks.

Lars would have said yes, only to shut his mouth at the regretting realization. “You probably want to spend more time with your family, right?”

The other boy hums. “Well… you’re my family too, Lars.”

Lars can’t help the weird snot catching up in his throat, so he makes an incomprehensible noise and mutters, “o-okay”.

Steven lies his body against the taller boy’s, smiling even if sadly. Lars’ head is supported by Steven’s, their bodies perfectly fit. They warm themselves in the cold night, protecting each other from the explosions and the scary flashes.

It’s not what Lars planned to spend his New Year’s Eve, but he wouldn’t trade this moment for anything.

[inkdemonapologist]

Okay but I do actually want to know both the things you love and the things you could rant about from DCTL?

OH BOY UHHHHHH okay lets see, I'm gonna see if I can do the "add a readmore after you post it" thing and see if that'll keep it stable.......

But also, much like Sammy, I am incapable of shutting up unless you strike me in the head with a blunt object, so uh, forgive my wordiness:

THINGS I ENJOY:

- DCTL gave us Sammy's ink addiction and like, if you had asked me before all this "what would you most like to see in a franchise?" I would not have answered "one of the characters drinks ink accidentally and then discovers that he can't stop" but boy that sure is my favourite concept that I LOVE to see handled literally any other way than how the book handled it!!!

- I like what it added to Tom and Allison and Norman!! Like, it's not big twists on their characters or anything -- we already knew Tom felt he was doing the wrong thing, so getting to see his CRUSHING GUILT over creating the machine isn't New Information, but it's nice to see and understand more of him; for all of them I feel a lot more attached to them after getting to see more of them as people.

- Like 90% of the "I LOVE IT" category for me is how the book handled Joey, and Buddy's relationship with Joey. The way Joey isn't a Sinister Mastermind Who’s Just Screwing With Everyone but just manipulative in a more mundane way -- someone who thinks of himself as just the guy with the vision to call the shots; he wants what he wants and this is how he's learned to get it; he exploits people not through devious schemes, but just by offering them something that they want or need and asking too much in return, expecting their loyalty for his favours. And the way he interacts with Buddy, making Buddy complicit with him and keeping Buddy off-balance and insecure while making him a favourite and treating him as Special is just PERFECT --  gives a lot of content to kind of extrapolate off of when pondering what must've drawn the others in and convinced them to ignore the red flags. I was initially frustrated with the idea of Buddy not being an artist and jUST DECIDING TO LEARN TO ANIMATE ON THE SPOT ("I've never done this before but I'm sure I can just do an artist's job" is a weirdly common throwaway thing in media and as an artist iTS A PET PEEVE) but actually the way they use his plagiarism to make him trapped in a lie in ways Joey doesn't even realise ends up being a neat echo of other employees (coughTOMcough), who were involved in much graver sins but suddenly felt they couldn't object or they'd lose their one chance, just like Buddy. There's a lot here that I think is really great.

OKAY THATS THE GOOD STUFF, LET'S COMPLAIN ABOUT SAMMY:

- Uncomfortable Bigotry Vagueness that we all knew was gonna be in this list -- I dunno man, a guy committing a microaggression and getting startled and defensive when he's called out for it doesn't necessarily completely ruin his character I GUESS, but the way this was handled is just SO WEIRD AND VAGUE that it's uncomfortable and it doesn't seem to serve any real purpose. "Is Tom black?" is a question I actually have to ask because the text sort of implies he is while also dancing around it and apparently Word of God said he's not??? which makes Buddy's comment nonsensical???? And I mean, you could go that route, since Buddy wonders to himself if Sammy talks to everyone like this -- HE ACTUALLY DOES!! Even within the text of the novel, he uses "Joey" instead of Mr. Drew, which is consistent with his audiologs in the game -- but that makes the writing suggest "this character THINKS this guy might be racist but actually they're reading too much into it and it wasn't racially motivated at all, he's just a jerk!!" wHICH IS SOMEHOW EVEN MORE ICKY??? Anyway like yeah I guess it's not inconsistent with his character that while Sammy Lawrence may not have any specific grudge against minorities he has probably not checked his privilege or done the work to challenge his own internal biases, but “Your Fav Probably Contributes To Systemic Racism In Ways He Hasn’t Considered, As Do We All When Our Assumptions Go Unchecked” is still a wild thing to wade through in a fun story about demonic cartoons

- but yknow so is T H E   H O L O C A U S T

- Sammy's voice is wrong. I'm actually okay with him being a weird awkward asshole, I already kind of assumed he was and that's part of why I like him!! but there's so many places he doesn't quite... talk like himself? And not just in terms of word choice, like -- so in his monologue at the end, he's described as talking so quickly that his words are "tumbling out faster than he can speak them," which initially seems fine; like yeah, that's a Standard Scene we're familiar with, the person who's been Driven Mad With Insight becoming more and more manic as they try to convey it -- until I tried to imagine it and realised that Sammy doesn't talk like this. That's a really consistent quality I always notice about his voice; whether he's almost giddily excited in prophet mode, or he’s his irritated and overworked human self, or he's violently angry and his voice has that echo effect -- he always speaks very deliberately. He enunciates carefully. There's some circumstances where I'd buy this as showing that he's Not Himself, but I feel like those would kind of need to be in the middle of his transformation, not at the end of it.

- In fact a lot of the scenes with Sammy kind of have this feeling -- that it's not necessarily an exploration of Sammy as a character, but that he is filling a trope or archetype role here. Once he's fully transformed he excitedly describes the process as more of a mental compulsion, which is in contrast to his weird yeerk-infected behaviour when trying to get ink from Miss Lambert. Both of those scenes don't seem wrong on their own because they fit tropes we know -- but they feel weird when you try to fit them together.

- I also just in general am not a fan of the ink acting like a weird yeerk. It can be a parasite I guess but when it starts overwriting and puppeting people and crawling around to enter their body that's just a completely DIFFERENT kind of supernatural story and it’s not what im here for!!!

- THE FREAKIN!!! HE WILL SET US FREE!!!! WHY????????? SAMUEL LAWRENCE WHAT IS HE SETTING YOU FREE FROM??????? Sammy has No Motive for any of what he's doing, other than just Ink Made Me Do It. The whole thing that was INTERESTING about Sammy as a character is the contrast between this frustrated, ornery musician with no specific love for the cartoons he works on, and the manically devoted cultist he becomes. What happened in the middle there? What made him desperate enough to shift his mindset so much? "Something supernatural made him do things that don't benefit him in any way" is a very boring answer to this question!!! Susie was a victim who implies that her transformation has forced her to do things she didn't want to do, but we can still see her motive -- she wanted to be Alice, so she took a sketchy offer to try to get what she wanted. Even now, her violence echoes that goal -- to be a more perfect Alice. What did Sammy want? WHO KNOWS. Even in his ink-addled state at the end, we don't understand what he hopes the Ink Demon will even do for him, and in fact he seems to be responsible for creating the very scenario he's begging Bendy to reverse in the game.

- [sighs loudly into my hands]

- Overall I'm left wondering if the author just..... didn't like Sammy Lawrence? And I don't mean that in the sense of him being a rude jerk -- like, Joey is not a good person, but the author seems to be interested in him and in what makes him tick. There doesn't seem to be that same interest in Sammy. Sammy's role in the story is that of a monster, transformed into something murderous, unable to prevent or choose it. He's not a victim of anyone but the ink, no one had to manipulate him or figure out how his brain worked or what he wanted or what he feared or give him any reason to do the things he does -- ink got in his mouth and overwrote his personality. And we don't even get to see that change, not really. He starts out angry and defensive and continues being angry and defensive up until his very last scene, denying his ink-stealing but not really much else. We see all his prophetic sketches but we never see hints of this in him, we never see him start to act more excited and hopeful, we never see him seek out the demon he desires to please. Why do we never see Sammy struggling between his dismissive angry front and a building religious fervour he can't quite suppress? We don't get to see any of the in-between. There's no interest at all in why or even what it looked like as Sammy became what he became, when, to be honest, I suspect interest in precisely that is one reason he's such a big fav.

- It's funny, in a "cries into my hands" kind of way, when Sammy is just knocked in the head while monologuing and immediately removed from the story without further mention, like...... that sure is the pattern with him, isn't it, he just tries very very hard and never actually gets to matter, but it also fits right in here, too, in this book that doesn't want to think about his motives -- he rambles nonsensically, explaining nothing, gets one trademark phrase, and then is hastily removed so the story doesn't have to think about him anymore.

...................I think that's most of it.

...

Y'all............ I'm not ready for Sent From Above.......... I'm just not.... I'm not emotionally ready...... like..... Sammy has to be in that right..... he’s Susie’s boss and she has that big crush on him..................................... I’m not ready

[jawritter]

You and Me...

Chapter 6

***SERIES WARNINGS**** Rape, non-con, male!rape, injury, violence, description of injury caused by rape, nightmares, self-harm, panic attacks, implied female non-con, language, ass hole Jensen, hurt!Jensen, dark fic, smut. If there is anything else I will add it as I go.

***Chapter Warnings*** VERY BIG TRIGGER WARNING!! This chapter contains descriptions of injuries and heavy implications of Male Rape! Please know I don’t take this sort of thing lightly, and I was gentle as possible in the descriptions and implications as I could be, but still getting the story across as well!! Hints of mental disturbance, language probably, kidnapping, Angst, overall this one is pretty heavy.

Word Count: 2790

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader, Jared x Reader, OFC Justin X Reader, OFC Steve x Reader

A/N: Anyway, all mistakes are mine, please don’t copy my work, Feedback is golden. If you want to be added to the series tag list, or my tag list just let me know! I hope you enjoy this one. After this chapter things tend to start to pick up a little.

Summary: It’s funny how one choice you made can change your whole life. One mistake can alter your course, and set you on a path that forever will haunt you. Two people find themselves getting through one of the hardest trials of Jensen’s life, on just one small promise. You and Me. We’ll get through it together…

Want more? Check out my Masterlist!!

***MASTERLIST***

***YOU AND ME MASTERLIST***

It had been three days since Jensen had been to the studio. 

Steve had tried calling him but got no answer. Steve was starting to get worried, therefore he was making sure everyone in the office was on edge because that was just Steve. 

"Maybe he changed his mind," you mumble, looking through the recordings that had already been done, and checking to make sure all the copyrights for the songs he wanted to do were sent off, and ready just in case he did decide to show back up.

"He can't change his mind! He's under contract to finish this album here in this studio," Steve gritted out, going through Jensen's paperwork looking for another contact to try. 

"Damn Steve, you put that shit on lock didn't you?" Justin said, spinning his chair in circles like an overgrown kid, not really concerned as to whether or not Jensen showed back up. He didn’t seem to like Jensen all that much anyway.

Steve turned to give him his best bitchface. "This album could put our studio on the map,"  he said coldly. “We need this guy to finish this album.”

Then something dawns on you, something you had totally forgotten about. You had Misha's number. 

You were going to send him a donation to his charity, and while he was here he gave it to you so that he could text you the address to send the money in to. 

"I have Misha's number, try him, maybe he knows a way to contact him," you glancing over your shoulder, and Steve looks at you like he wants to kill you for waiting until now to let that little piece of information out. 

Pulling out your phone and text him the phone number, and as soon as his phone buzzed with the number he was calling it, walking into the office, and leaving you and Justin to sit in silence on the other side of the door, listening to see if you could hear something. All the two of you seemed to make out was a muffled conversation that honestly sounded like it was very one-sided, with Misha doing the majority of the talking.

After about 15 minutes Steve walked back into the main recording room pale, and a little nauseated, flopping down in the chair next to you. 

"What I'm about to tell you guys doesn't leave this room," Steve said, looking between Justin and yourself. Your heart jumped speed. You didn't like the way he said that. 

"Three days ago Jensen was forcibly taken from Jared's bar when he was helping a bartender close up. They just found him today. He's at St. David's South Austin Medical Center," Steve looked down at the ground, and then back up at you two like he was unsure whether or not to tell you both the rest of the story. 

"Is he okay?" you asked. 

You weren’t exactly sure why your heart fell to your feet. Your hand ideally ran across the hand he touched just a few days ago taking his coffee from you.

"Was it some crazy super fan?" Justin asked, looking at Steve like he was bullshitting the two of you. 

Steve turned a little greener. 

"No, it wasn't a fan apparently,” Steve took a deep breath in order to settle himself.  

“Jensen and Jennifer hooked up a little over a week ago. Apparently, things didn’t go exactly the way she’d hoped, so when she got home she told her brother that Jensen had raped her. He and a few of his buddies took Jensen, and for three days kept him locked in a hotel... Returning the favor," Steve stopped talking, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes tight. Taking a deep breath to stave off the urge to throw up, or scream because he felt like doing both.

You fought to keep your breakfast down. The room seemed to be spinning. Your heart broke for him. Why you didn't know. What the hell? Why do you care so much? He was nothing but a complete and total ass to you! He hated you! Still, you couldn’t shake the gut-wrenching feeling deep down inside of you no matter how hard you tried to.

---------------------------------------

Later that night you paced around your apartment with Steve's words ringing in your head. You couldn't imagine what Jensen had gone through over the past three days. It made you sick to your stomach every time you thought about it. 

Grabbing your purse you decide, probably against your better judgment, to head to the hospital. You had to see him. You didn't understand why, you had to see that he was okay. 

So now you found yourself walking through the halls of the hospital looking for a nurse to ask which room they were keeping Jensen in. Holding your studio ID tight in your hand, hoping it was enough for them to let you into his room. This late at night you would think there would be more nurses roaming the halls, but things were still and quiet, not much movement at all.

You were just about to give up. You had just about walked the whole hospital, and no one seemed to know where he was. Making your way back to the second-floor elevators you pressed the button impatiently, wondering if maybe they moved him to a different hospital, or if he just asked people to not come to visit him right now, so they were keeping his location a secret or something. 

It was stupid to come here in the first place. Jensen hated your guts. He wouldn't want to see you, so why the hell were you even here? That’s what your brain was screaming at you, and you had just about resided to the fact that it was right, and you were being an idiot by coming here.

Annoyed that the elevator was taking so long to open you were about to turn to take the stairs when you heard the familiar ding of the doors opening. Looking up you come face to... well... mid-chest... with Jared. 

"Y/N!" Jared said, wrapping you in a bone-crushing hug. He looked exhausted. The amount of puffiness and redness around his eyes told you he had been crying. "What are you doing here?" he asked, surprised to see you standing there. 

"Misha told us what happened. I came to see Jensen, but I can't find his room. No one seems to know where he is, or at least they don't want to tell me," you tell him, embarrassed that you even came you stared down at your feet.

Jared draped a long arm around your shoulders turning you around and headed toward the end of the hallway with you, stopping in front of room 241 he turned to face you. 

"Y/N, I want to tell you what you're going to see in there. It's not pretty." 

You took a deep breath. Why the hell were you all in your feels right now?

"What did they do to him, Jared?" you asked, almost afraid of the answer. Jared swallowed hard, looking like he was about to start crying again. 

"They jumped him in my bar while he was waiting on the new guy I hired to close up. They tied him up, knocked him out, and dragged him out of the bar. The rest we are guessing. He hasn't said a word since the ambulance driver picked him up on the side of the road where they dumped him when they were done with him. According to the doctors, it looks like he was tied down to something, then was repeatedly violated. That’s all we know, and he’s not telling." 

You held the vomit back that threatened in the back of your throat. Both you and Jared shivered involuntarily.

"When I first saw him he was covered in blood, and what looked like vomit. They had to sedate him to clean it all off of him and do the examination. Every time someone touches him he freaks out. They couldn't even get him as clean as they wanted because he was fighting so hard. From what I understand they cut the twist ties off of his wrist in the ambulance. They said he was just dumped completely naked, and still tied. Some dick truck driver saw him, and called the ambulance, but didn’t have the decency to stop and help him. Just kept on driving.”

Jared watched as you tried to compose yourself, the flood of emotions that were hitting you as he told you how he was found was more than you thought it would be for you. 

"You sure you wanna go in there?" he asked you when you finally could breathe properly.”I get it if you don’t.”  

"Yeah. I need to see him." 

Jared never questioned, he just shook his head and opened the door. 

At first, you didn't even see him lying in the bed. It just looked like a heap of covers in the middle of the bed. Moving around the bed you finally found the top of his head. 

He was laying on his side with his back to the door, the covers pulled all the way up almost over his head. 

"Jay...  Y/N's here to see you," Jared said, walking around the bed first. 

The heap of cover never moved. Jared looked at you apologetically. 

You slowly made your way around the bed, afraid of what you were going to see. He looked so fragile lying there in that bed with monitor, wires and different IV's coming out from under the cover. There wasn't a lot of bruise on his face. Especially around his mouth. It was bruised all the way around his lips to almost his left ear. His lips were swollen and cracked.  You shuddered at the thought of what might have caused that. 

The rest of him was well covered, but for a scratched up hand sticking out from under the cover by his face. 

It was his eyes that got to you the most. 

He never made eye contact with you or Jared. He just stared at the wall between the two of you blankly. No light there at all. No movement. A very evident “the light's are on, but no one is home” look. 

You couldn't stop the cascade tears that were falling down your face. They had broken something deep inside him, and you didn’t have to be a doctor to see it. 

"Physically the injuries aren't permanent. It's the mental damage the doctors are worried about," Jared said, sitting on the small sofa next to his friend's bed, watching him closely. 

Jensen just continued to look at the wall as if the two of you weren’t even in the room, and no one was talking about him less than three feet away from his bed. 

There was a picture of him and his kids by the bed, no doubt brought there by Jared. He was smiling in the photo. He looked so happy. So contradictory to the broken man laying there in front of you. The longer you stood there you felt like your heart shattered into a million pieces. 

Everything in you wanted to pick him up and just hold him until he was okay again, even though you knew that him being “okay” again wouldn’t ever be that easy.

"Did he really do what they say he did to Jennifer?" you turned and asked Jared, feeling like you were going to be sick again looking at the dirt and dried blood under his fingernails. 

You tried to keep your mind from wondering whether the blood was his, or his attackers. You weren’t very successful.

"I don't know, and I'm not trying to justify anything he may have done, but do you think he would have deserved this? I was there when he asked her to dinner with him. She was definitely more than willing to show up at his house wearing next to nothing." 

He was right of course. No one deserved what Jensen had been through. 

You sat down in the chair next to his bed. Jensen was still staring at the wall like he didn't even know the two of you were in there. Reflexively you reached for his hand, wanting to comfort him in some way, but he jerked it under the cover before you even got close, never making a sound. 

Even though he didn’t make a sound, he slowly looked up at you. Jared moved closer, not sure what he was going to do, but hoping that seeing you would pull him out of whatever mental cage he had enclosed himself in. 

He did nothing. He stared at you for maybe a whole minute. A single tear slipping down his face then looked back at the wall. The blank look never once leaving his eyes. 

Nurses came in checking the monitors while you and Jared sat next to Jensen talking, trying to avoid the subject of Jensen's injuries in front of him. Neither of you wanted to upset him. Jensen never moved, still just staring at the wall. 

Finally, looking up at the clock you saw that it was close to 1 in the morning. Rubbing your face in frustration because even though you knew it was late you didn't want to leave him. He had dozed on and off while the two of you sat there talking, but he seemed to be awake right then. The amount of drugs they were giving him to manage his pain level probably didn't help his current state either. Still, you couldn't imagine the physical pain he was in. You didn't even want to think about what was going on in his head. Still, it was late, and you needed to let Jared get some rest. 

"It's getting late, I need to let you rest. I'll come by tomorrow after work if that's okay," you tell Jared, reaching down to grabbing your purse. When you leaned down to grab your purse you had put your hand on the bed to brace yourself.  It was something you did without thinking. Just a natural movement.

So lightly you almost didn't notice it you feel a calloused hand lay softly on top of yours. Looking up you see Jensen had reached over and grabbed your hand. Both yourself and Jared held your breath. For the first time, Jensen slowly made full eye contact with you, and not like he was looking through you with the same blank look on his face. 

It was eerie and unnatural. Even though he was physically there, and probably knew vaguely where he was, he seemed to mentally be millions of miles away.

You went to take your hand away just to see what he would do, testing the waters kind of. When you did he tightened his grip on your hand, holding it in place. 

"Jay," Jared said, trying to get his friend to look at him. 

Jensen never spoke, but he did look at him with tears falling from his deep green eyes. It almost looked like he was on the edge of panic, but wasn’t quite mentally there enough to fall over that edge. 

"Are you in pain?" Jared asked. 

Jensen did nothing. 

"Do you not want Y/N to leave?" he asked Jensen again. 

Jensen did nothing, just stared back and forth between Jared and yourself. 

Closing his eyes he slipped back into his drug-induced sleep with a death grip still on your hand.

For just a moment you considered staying, you did stay for another hour, Jensen never moved again, just slept. Honestly, it's what his body needed. To rest. So you gently slipped your hand out of his, gave Jared a hug, and your number, telling him to call you if he needed anything, and made your way to the door, letting both men get some rest. 

When you finally got back to your car you sat there completely broken-hearted for the man lying in that hospital bed.

You hadn't realized it till right now. Seeing him so broken had brought it right in the front of your attention. 

You didn't hate him like you thought. 

You felt something else entirely. 

This changes things.

For you anyway. Jensen had a long road ahead of him. Last you knew he hated you. Starting your car you wiped away the tears that were still falling from your own eyes. Praying to whoever was listening that you didn't get your heartbroken and that he could recover from this.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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[yourcoolfriendwithallthecandy]

Why So Jaded? Chapter 4

Chapter 4! In case you missed it, Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3. FFN, AO3

Why So Jaded

Chapter 4

Sunday night Violet took the new medication according to the new prescriptions on the bottles and noticed if she took it as directed, it would last her about two months. Which she sadly figured she would be using up in half that time. But at least at first, she was going to follow the prescription.

Monday morning came and Violet came into work with a cheerful smile and more pep in her step than ever and looking particularly breathtaking.

"Don't you look stunning this morning." Phillip praised when he saw her come into his office that morning, her hair was down and in curls and her makeup was done exceptionally beautifully and her attire was more colorful and vibrant and flattering too.

"Well thanks to you, I had a great weekend and the new sleep aids and painkillers are working really well, like exquisitely well. I got a whole, glorious twelve hours of sleep last night, I felt like I was ancient for going to bed at seven pm but I needed it and woke up refreshed and invigorated and I feel great so bravo to the medical team, they are onto some winners as far as meds, this is my favorite batch yet." She appraised happily which got Phillip to smile gratefully and appreciatively and filled him with relief and happiness that she responded so well to the change. Maybe once she was on these meds for a little while and saw the marked improvement, she wouldn't kill him for going behind her back and using Mr. Pine to achieve the breakthrough.

"So what do we have for Mr. Pine this morning?" She asked as she got a new tablet and got it ready to receive new data since the last one was broken beyond repair.

"Uh nothing new. He is working on a new project though that he got over the weekend that he's coincidentally needing to use the medical lab for. So he's actually in the medical lab right now." Phillip carefully and vaguely informed her.

"Oh, ok." Violet shrugged, not thinking anything of it.

"Well it's almost nine, I better check in with him, see if he needs anything. I'll see you later." She offered before she uncharastically kissed his cheek sweetly.

"See you later Handsome." She offered before she left as Phillip practically lit up with excitement. Oh whatever she was on, she needed to keep on it because that felt incredibly genuinely affectionate to him and he was over the moon. Operation Wife was on!

Violet felt so amazing, she felt invigorated, refreshed and not a hint of pain in anything. She could even wear these heels and not feel uncomfortable in the least. She didn't feel like her senses were dulled at all, if anything they were sharper than they were before.

"Good morning Dr. Gjersoe, Mr. Pine." She greeted cheerfully as she came in as Dr. Gjersoe immediately buried her schematics so she wouldn't see them.

"Good morning." They mirrored as Buddy was impressed she still didn't want to kill him this morning.

"I came to check in this morning Mr. Pine, do you have a moment?" She asked thoughtfully, wanting him to have some privacy from everyone else in the medical lab.

"Uh, yeah, sure." He confirmed as he gave Dr. Gjersoe a meaningful glance before followed her out of the lab and into a private office nearby.

"So...do you still want to kill me this morning?" Buddy blurted out which made Violet look at him like he was crazy before she laughed.

"What? Oh, oh because of Friday, no, no, don't worry about it. I actually need to apologize to you because you were just...being a decent human being by showing some sympathy and I was the one who was out of line and I'm sorry." She genuinely offered and it was his turn to look at her like she was crazy.

"Uh...what?" Buddy asked, completely dumbfounded.

"Ok, let's clear the air." She suggested before she did something with the tablet that shut off the cameras and listening devices in the office so they could truly talk privately.

"Ok, so Leslie sent me the audio and video of the conversation you had with Mr. Sebastian after I left on Friday and I watched and listened to it several times. You're incredibly perceptive and I believe that you were being genuine with Mr. Sebastian when you were talking to him and I believe you. If you say that you harbor no ill will towards myself and my family and by the sounds of it, you've been to therapy yourself to come to the realization that you by all accounts were unbalanced and super obsessed with my father which in turn led to some really bad decisions on your part and you regret it and obviously I see some guilt and shame in your eyes even now. And the fact that you put up no argument making me your heir apparent. Tells me that you must have changed in the decade or so since we were last in each other's presence. And a decade can be a long time and a lot has changed since then for both of us and our circumstances are different. And when you told me that Syndrome died that day in the jet turbine, I didn't want to believe you but after that conversation you had with Mr. Sebastian, and if you will swear on Tali - that Syndrome will never, ever get resurrected and the only person I will or anyone else ever interact with from now on is just...Buddy Pine. Then that's all I n\eed. We're both adults and professionals. I believe in giving people enough rope to hang themselves on. So what do you say? Will you just be Buddy Pine, a colleague?" She offered her hand to him to shake.

"I will, And I swear on Natalia Octavia that Syndrome or any other Super persona I could ever invent will never see the light of day." Buddy swore before he shook her hand which got Violet to smile fondly at him which he soon mirrored.

"Good, also word of advice, never, ever imply that Mr. Sebastian has super powers again. The last few who have- are now six feet under. Also don't ever make any comments about my relationship with Mr. Sebastian either, don't hint or poke or question or anything to either him or myself or anyone else, because again, he's very touchy about it. I'm surprised he didn't seriously retaliate against you for it, at least yet anyway. You got lucky, don't press your luck again. Got it?" She urged him.

"Understood." Buddy nodded in agreement. "So, how are the new meds working out?" Buddy asked hopefully.

"How did you know I was given new meds?" Violet frowned as she folded her arms in front of herself.

"Uh...you...you said you saw the conversation, you didn't see Mr. Sebastian escorted me to the medical lab?" Buddy questioned.

"I...I did not. Are you telling me that you're working on my own medical issues? That my new medication...came from you?" Violet asked as she tried to resist the panic starting to whirl in her chest but despite the initial spike in anxiousness, it never grew from there. If anything- she was able to keep it stable instead of being overpowered by it.

"He didn't tell you?" Buddy asked with a wince and a grimace.

"No, not yet." Violet took a deep breath and with a calming breath and refocus, she was able to fully regain her composure and push down her anxiety which soon dissipated as she was once again, able to look at the bigger picture.

"Ok, so this is your new medical project and why you needed to be in the medical lab over the weekend and from now on, of course, of course , why didn't I put it together." She muttered as she took a step back and took a moment to come to terms with it before she took another step forward and faced him and fixed him with a questioning look.

"Can you cure me?" Violet asked.

"In theory, yes. But curing you while keeping all of your powers intact yet freeing you of the crippling pain is the biggest challenge. However it's a challenge I'm very familiar with. Thankfully progress has been made since I last tried to tackle it and there are new compounds being found and tested all the time. All I need is time." Buddy professed.

"How much time?"

"Could be weeks, could be months, maybe a year or two at the latest. But in order for it to be effective I and the other doctors need you to be completely honest with us about what's happening and what's hurting and what side effects you're feeling and experiencing and what's been working and what hasn't. We all want to help. And in order for us to help best, we have to know more than what you've given us previously." Buddy pleaded because Dr. Gjersoe had told him that Violet was a difficult patient because she was so dodgy and mistrusting and super vague in her answers.

"Look I completely understand your need for secrecy, I built an empire on it ok? And I realize that as a Super, secrecy keeps you alive and keeps you safe right?" Buddy questioned and Violet had to nod in agreement with that reasoning.

"But like you've said, if you can just trust us enough to help, give us just enough rope to hang ourselves on so we can help, that's all we want. We don't need to know your life story or anything. We just need to know things like side effects and effectiveness. And we both know you're closest to Mr. Sebastian and he's been our go between but he doesn't always know what and how to ask to get the answers we need." Buddy added.

"OK, ok, fine. I give. Just enough to hang you all on." Violet caved before she re-swipped the tablet to reverse the 'lockdown' mode before they left the room and went back to the medical suite as Violet let them question and poke and prod her all they needed to and answered their questions to the degree she felt comfortable with and what they needed and when they were done she left and returned to Phillip's office.

"Hey, you were gone a while, everything ok?" Phillip noted and the smile that Violet gave him told him that she was far from pleased. It was her 'I'm going to kick your ass' smile and it gave him dread.

"Yeah, I was in the medical wing letting Dr. Gjersoe and his team know how the new meds were working out." She answered as she came and handed him her tablet.

"By the way, I had a very enlightening discussion with Mr. Pine about what happened over the weekend and why exactly he's in the medical wing." Violet leveled as she folded her arms under her chest and popped her hip and fixed him with a look that made him feel two inches tall as Phillip pursed his lips and had a guilty expression.

"So, what you're going to do- is give me the same clearance you have, so that I can keep an eye on this situation myself because you should have asked me about bringing Mr. Pine into this and the only reason I'm not handing you your ass over this is because I know that you're just as desperate for a solution as I am. And then you are never going to circumvent me again. Because if you do- contracts be damned, I will be gone faster than you can blink and I will disappear and you will have to spend every penny you have ten times over in an effort to find me again and you still won't be able to. This situation - will never repeat or so help me God, I will go full supervillain on your ass and there will be nowhere- where you can hide from me. I hunt and kill for a living remember? And I'm the best there is. You're lucky that I am able to see the bigger picture this time and see your intentions, although good- the way you handled this was wrong. Otherwise, I would already be gone. Also, you will not be retaliating against anyone for this because this was all on you and you can't hold this against Mr. Pine because I didn't give him a choice other than to tell me the truth. Third. I have decided to give Mr. Pine just enough rope to hang himself on along with everyone in the medical wing but I need you to know and understand, that I am holding you personally responsible for what happens next with my healthcare. Are we clear?" She proposed.

"Yes." Phillip confirmed as he went ahead and did as she demanded of him with her tablet, grateful this wasn't nearly as bad as he figured it would be.

"Good, now, let's move forward. There's the expo in Vegas in a few weeks, I think we should go and bring Mr. Pine with us- I can get him a good handler and we can announce to the world that IRize and SEB Industries are collaborating, get some good press for both of you. And if in the next few weeks, Mr. Pine proves himself trustworthy. We put a deterrent bracelet and a pin on him to keep him from running and we'll get him a handler. And if he does well there, then we can take him to Hong Kong and Tokyo for those expos in a few months. It would keep him from getting too stir crazy." She suggested.

"I think that might work." Phillip agreed.

"Good." Violet smiled victoriously before she took her tablet back and went to the tech department to figure out what could be used for her ventures and made a few orders before she went back to her office to find an appropriate handler. They had to be trustworthy, competent, intelligent, strong and versatile as she narrowed down her search to a few options.

"Good evening Mr. Pine." Violet greeted when she came into his lab for her evening check in.

"Good evening Ms. Parr." Buddy mirrored as he came over and put the cookies he had made for them on the island she liked to do their check ins at. He noticed she tended to stay longer and actually chit chat when he had snacks for her. Today was a cookie day he felt as she happily took a cookie as a peace offering.

"So, do you have anything outstanding that you wish to report?" Violet began before she bit into the cookie and practically melted in her spot. She secretly thought it was awesome that Buddy not only could cook decently well, but could also bake and was surprisingly very self sufficient. He did all his own laundry and dishes and cooking and kept his space pretty clean which always impressed her because Phillip was a master in the boardroom- but completely useless in a domestic setting and she doubted he even knew where his dry-cleaners was on a map, let alone what clothes needed to be washed vs. dry cleaned.

"Other than the medical lab is making you a three to six month supply of your current medication that should be ready in a few days, no." He answered.

"Awesome." Violet smiled happily as she notated that.

"So, I have a proposition for you." She began as she got a stool and sat down on it as Buddy took her cue and got on his own stool on the other side of the island facing her as he got a cookie himself.

"Ms. Parr, I'm flattered but what would Mr. Sebastian think if he knew a young pretty thing like you was propositioning an old man like me?" Buddy teased as he pressed a hand to his chest as he pretended to be scandalized which got Violet to laugh which in turn got him to chuckle. Pleased he could make her laugh.

"I walked right into that." Violet realized as she just shook her head.

"Anyway- so, on account that you appear to be very settled in, to the point you are already completely unpacked and you've sorted your tools and rearranged your living space- twice. I suspect that you are already showing signs of becoming a little stir crazy." Violet ventured.

"Dang it, I was hoping it wasn't that noticeable." Buddy murmured as he snapped his fingers sarcastically. God she was especially gorgeous today, he was practically swooning. He could smell the products she used in her hair and perfume she sprayed that morning as it lingered on her person. It was like someone brought a bouquet of flowers into an operating room because the lab he liked to keep clean, sanitized and sterilized. And while she was a Super, she brought a human element to this environment that he appreciated.

"Well, I may have a solution for you. So as you know, there is a tech expo in Vegas in a few weeks that IRize was supposed to have been invited to go to. I suggested to Mr. Sebastian for you to come with us and we can make an announcement of the collaboration." She began.

"What's the catch? Cause there's always a catch with something like this." Buddy asked with a puzzled frown.

"The catch is you will be wearing something like this the whole time." She said as she pulled the watch out of her pocket and put it on the counter and slid it to him before he picked it up and looked it over and resisted the urge to take it apart.

"Think of it like a shock collar for a dog to stay in an invisible fence. You will technologically tethered to your handler. But it would let you out of here and give you a tiny bit more freedom and hopefully you won't feel too stir crazy. And if that goes well and you don't hang yourself on that length of rope, then you can get another length of rope when could go to Hong Kong in a few months." She revealed to him.

"Would you be my handler?" Buddy asked hopefully.

"No, I'm already Mr. Sebastian's handler, I don't pull double duty, neither you or him could ever pay me enough." Violet smiled smugly.

"Oh come on, I would behave, I promise." Buddy vowed.

"Yeah I'm sure you would. But I can't say the same for Mr. Sebastian. My hands are already full if not threatening to overflow with just him. So I will be getting a handler for you." Violet maintained.

"So, all I need from you- is your word not to run or try to escape or make any S.O.S signals or anything like that, also a script will be provided to you for all press you would have and if you would need any new attire for this trip, that can also be arranged." She offered.

"And a haircut please." Buddy proposed as he ran his fingers through is hair, noting how it could use a trim.

"That can be arranged as well." Violet nodded as she made notes about it.

"The suit shop and tailor I like to use the most is Black Orchid and they will need at least two weeks to create your suits, would you like your haircut then or would you prefer to have it right before you leave?" Violet inquired.

"It can get cut then, might as well do it all at once while we're out." Buddy decided.

"Ok. Now for this particular outing, when we get your suits measured and ordered, I will be your handler and you will have your own security detail who will be armed with live rounds and you will be wearing a deterrent as well that will be tethered to me. Meaning you leave my side any other reason other than to relieve yourself, by a distance of more than fifty feet and at the least- you'll lose a limb, at the most- it will kill you. Do you understand?" Violet warned him evenly.

"Yes Ma'am." Buddy nodded in agreement.

"Great, now, what day this week would you prefer to go?" Violet asked between bites of her cookie.

"Any day that works for you." Buddy answered.

"Let's go Wednesday, give those tailors an extra few days on those suits." Violet proposed.

"Sounds great." Buddy grinned.

Buddy was absolutely giddy for the opportunity to go on an outing, let alone with Violet, he didn't care if a hundred henchmen joined them. He had to stay within fifty feet of her. Hell he would happily stay within five. The closer the better.

Wednesday morning Violet along with only two henchmen arrived at 9:15 a.m.

"Good morning Mr. Pine, are you ready to go?" She asked as she came in with two henchmen trailing her.

"Yes." Buddy answered as he came out of the 'apartment' section of his lab. Dressed and ready to go.

"Awesome. Before we go, there are a few things we need to go over. First- this is Mr. Leland and Mr. Nelson they will be our security detail, they will protect us while we're out but they will not hesitate to rock your shit if you step out of line." Violet informed him.

"Ok." Buddy nodded, amused at her choice of words.

"Also this is one of the tethers." She said as she presented him with the watch before Buddy took the one he was already wearing off and presented his wrist to her so she could put it on before she did, locking it with her thumb print on the face of the watch as it sized itself to his wrist and locked itself into his biometrics.

"And this is the other." Violet said as she took a pin from the same box in as the watch since it was with the watch and matched it style and fastened it to his shirt.

"The pin is your own passkey in the building." Violet informed him.

"Snazzy." Buddy appraised as he looked at it appreciatively which got Violet to snort a laugh and him to grin a little wider.

"OK, the next order of business is the safety protocol. If at any point our safety is compromised or something is going down or sideways, we're being ambushed or there's an assassination attempt or anything like that or even in the occurrence of someone imposter-ing myself or you or anyone else- there's a safety word I will use to positively identify you and everyone else. So I need you to think of a word that you can say quickly and easily to make sure that you're you." Violet urged him.

"Ok, what's the safe word?" Buddy asked.

"Twatwaffle." Violet informed him which got Buddy to bust out laughing.

"What? Of all the words in all the languages, our lives could be in danger and you're going to yell 'twatwaffle'?" Buddy asked incredulously. "You're serious? You're being serious right now?" Buddy prodded.

"Yeah, it has saved our collective asses repeatedly because everyone tries to think of really "cool" names to use that no one remembers in the heat of the moment. But in a life or death situation, you need the ludicrous and the unexpected but memorable to save your bacon. So when and if I ever have to use the "Twatwaffle" protocol. What will be your response? Because again, Mr. Nelson and Mr. Leland will also need to know it to make sure you are you and not an imposter or that I'm not an imposter." Violet maintained.

"Jesus, ok. Uh, if you're going to yell 'twatwaffle' I guess I could reply with Shmoke, like 'would you like a shmoke and a pancake?." Buddy replied because his brain couldn't think of anything else.

"Shmoke it is." Violet nodded as she put that in with a grin.

"OK, now we can go." Violet said as she then put the tablet into her bag and turned and left and walked out of there with Buddy walking only a step behind her with Mr. Nelson and Mr. Leland a step behind him before they went down the elevator to the SUV where Mr. Leland and Mr. Nelson opened the car doors for Violet and Buddy to get into the backseat before Mr. Leland got in the drivers side and Mr. Nelson got in the passenger side and they went to Black Orchid which was the best suit shop and tailor's in the city while Violet had an extra specialist to come in for the suit fittings.

"Miss Parr, always a pleasure to have you here." The shop owner Mr. Sudwar greeted as he came and shook her hand and kissed her cheeks as she did the same with a sweet adoring smile.

"Mr. Sudwar, it's always a pleasure to be here, especially when it's with you." Violet replied charmingly.

"Is Mr. Sebastian needing anything?" He asked.

"Not today, this is his new dear friend and close colleague though, Mr. Pine, and it is him that we are fitting out today under Mr. Sebastian's suggestion and highest recommendation." Violet introduced.

"Any friend and colleague of Mr. Sebastian's is one of mine. What can I do for you Mr. Pine?" He asked hopefully.

"The works." Violet answered for Buddy.

"Oh, well then right this way." Mr. Sudwar ushered Buddy before another man came to stand next to Violet.

"Mademoiselle." He greeted.

"Benny, thank you so much for coming on such short notice. How are you?" Violet greeted as she gave him a hug.

"I'm doing well. Always a pleasure to hear from you." He answered.

"Oh good, so I have a favor to ask- in three and a half weeks, Mr. Pine will be accompanying Mr. Sebastian and myself to an expo in Vegas and possibly Tokyo and Hong Kong a few months after that. So I need to have the same precautions and safety features on Mr. Pine's suits that Mr. Sebastian does. Because while Mr. Sebastian is my asset, Mr. Pine is Mr. Sebastian's so therefore he is mine as well. And I need to make sure that while we're vulnerable in the public, Mr. Pine won't be that exposed." Violet specified with a meaningful look.

"I can make that happen, but for the time frame, I'll need a 15% increase in my usual fee." Benny proposed.

"Make it twenty. It's all on Mr. Sebastian's dime anyway." Violet insisted with a flip of her hand.

"You got it." Benny nodded as he brought up a card reader and Violet got Phillip's business credit card out and swiped it before he got her a receipt and handed it to her.

"Thank you Benny, we should get lunch soon, bring the family, I haven't seen Annie and Maddox in forever." She suggested.

"Name the time and place." Benny urged.

"Anabel's', say noon tomorrow?" Violet suggested.

"It's a date, we'll be there." Benny grinned before he left and got his own materials and went back into the work shop part of the shop to work with the tailors just as Buddy was put into his first suit as Mr. Sudwar made his measurements and suggestions for the look of suit that would look best on Buddy, make him appear taller than he was because Buddy was on the shorter, stockier side as Violet came into the room where Buddy was up on the podium to appraise him herself, tilting her head to the side and noting how fair he was along with the shade of orangish red his hair was and made the mental notes of what suit colors would compliment him best.

"Miss Parr? What are your thoughts?" Mr. Sudwar asked as he also took notes of what she seemed to be drawn to on the fabric swatches before she brought them over to them and held them up to Buddy and Buddy was struck by how thoughtful Violet was being as she picked the perfect colors to compliment him and how she was already up to date with all the trends as she then made sure he would have all the shirts and ties he would ever need in a lifetime as she went through the place with a fine toothed comb and found all kinds of little gems to make Buddy shine like a star and Buddy was supremely flattered as he simply let her do as she pleased and always agreed with her suggestions. Because her taste was exquisite and flawless and he found it was sentimental that she went through so much trouble to make sure he looked good. If he had the opportunity, he would have reached out to Edna to create Violet a wardrobe of gowns and whatever else she wanted, if only it would match all of this.

And by the time they were done, they went out to lunch, Buddy eternally grateful it was actual fine dining and not take out. After lunch, she took him to Vers, a male spa that Mr. Sebastian and his staff and most of the male members of his company also frequented. Where Buddy also got not just a haircut but manicure and pedicure and even a massage and a facial which he hadn't gotten in what felt like forever and when they were done with that, they all went out to dinner. At a proper high end steak house and Buddy happily gorged himself on wagyu beef and when he was good and satisfied did they return to SEB industries as Mr. Nelson and Mr. Leland helped take Buddy's new things to his floor.

"I got it from here guys, thank you so much for your services today." Violet dismissed them as they nodded and left.

"You did good today Mr. Pine," Violet praised as she took the pin off his jacket and put it away before she took the watch off and put that into its case as well.

"I never realized you had such exquisite taste." Buddy praised as Violet helped bring his things into the apartment side of the floor which was in all reality like a high rise apartment.

"I've learned from the best. And having Mr. Sebastian as an asset, I've learned a thing or two about the way high society people look, act, dress and behave. I'd be a fool not to pick up on at least some of it." Violet professed as she put his clothing bags on his perfectly made bed for him to put away.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Buddy felt compelled to ask as he put his other things next to it on the bed as well, appreciating the intimate setting. And if circumstances were different, he wished there wasn't at least six cameras on them and they could really be alone. But the way Violet paused and looked away and bit and chewed her bottom lip and fidgeted with her perfectly manicured nails, was adorable, if not incredibly endearing and Buddy just got a sense that he was finally seeing just a little glimpse of the real her.

"Because a cage is a cage- no matter how gilded. If you can find contentment and a measure of happiness in it, the less likely you'll be to try to break out of it." Violet said simply with a sad smile as Buddy suddenly was struck by the truth of the situation. Violet was obviously just as much of a prisoner that he was. That's why she was being nice. She had been living like this for a year. He was barely in a month. She was coming from experience. This is how she was surviving it as he also wondered if that's what Tali had been feeling. And why she was always keen on missions. She wanted to break free just as much Violet did.

"How gilded is your cage?" Buddy asked as he shoved his hands in his pockets to keep himself from reaching out to her.

"A bit more so than yours, and a little bigger. But a cage nonetheless. I don't know how the next handler to Mr. Sebastian will treat you. This is my last assignment before permanent retirement. And I want it to be my best work. And I want it done right. And being kind, and showing sympathy and empathy are the best ways I've found to do it. I know three years seems like a long time. And I'll only be here for two of those three. And I have a feeling that last one will be the hardest. I can only hope my replacement will treat you with respect and dignity. You deserve it. Goodnight Mr. Pine." She bid him before she stepped around him, simply reaching out her hand to gently move him out of her way so she could get out of there because if she stayed any longer and talked any more about this, she would get in trouble in more ways than one.

"Violet?" Buddy called after her as she turned to look at him questioningly.

"You deserve better too. A gilded cage is no place for you either." Buddy professed as he had turned with her and was facing her once again.

"I know, we will just have to make the most of it won't we Mr. Pine? In our side by side cages." Violet urged as she picked her head up high with a fond and understanding smile.

"We will." Buddy nodded in agreement.

"Good night Ms. Parr, thank you, for everything today." Buddy graciously thanked her.

"You're welcome." Violet nodded before she saw herself out and dropped off what she needed off at the tech department and used the long walks from Buddy's apartment to the tech department to rein in her own emotions and reinforce her composure.

"So how was today?" Phillip asked as he came by her office to see her off.

"It was really good, it worked beautifully. He won't want to break free any time soon. He'll be happy and content for a while. Although I think if we make outings a regular thing for him, that'll be the best thing for the situation." Violet mused.

"I noticed your sympathetic "gilded cage" worked like a charm. He was practically eating out your hand." Phillip noted proudly and Violet could only huff a laugh. Of course he would think that was a manipulation. Everything was a manipulation to him. Even though Violet had been genuine in that sentiment.

"It did." Violet had to admit.

"Do you think there's a danger of you two getting too close?" Phillip questioned as he began to second guess his decision to have his 'pet' be their liaison.

"No. All Mr. Pine sees when he looks at me is Mirage 2.0. Mirage took care of everything for him, from picking out his attire, to managing his life practically, I saw it when I was suit shopping with him and picking shirts and ties out for him. He agreed with every decision I made and never argued or had a difference once, I'm surprised he didn't slip and call me by her name. And how he is with me is how he was with her before she betrayed him. Which is good, it's right where you and I want and need him to be." Violet assured Phillip. Because if she could make him believe that. The more freedoms he would perhaps grant Buddy.

"You're amazing, you know that?" Phillip praised.

"Thank you, see you tomorrow Phillip. Good night." She cooed with a sweet kiss before she left her office and went to her apartment. She got ready for bed and she thought of all the ways she could help Buddy stand his confinement better because as strange as it was. She had so much in common with him. They were practically in side by side cages at this point. She hated all the 31 cameras and listening devices in her apartment that she knew Phillip put there to keep an eye on her behind her back and she had simply learned to never let the 'act' down. She hated all the bugs and chips in all of her electronics and her vehicles. She hated how even when she went on missions. There was always SEB tech with her and even then it was like Phillip was always there and she couldn't escape him. It was why every other Super before her had quit. It was why finding a replacement anytime soon was nigh impossible. It made hiding her escape routes and hiding her back up plans from him as hard as it was but thankfully, not impossible. And while charming Phillip had brought her some freedoms and trust. It wasn't complete. And until Phillip eased up and stopped all of this surveillance on her, that she could never, ever give herself to him. And why she could never love him. Love without trust wasn't love. Love without faith, fidelity or commitment or compromise wasn't love either and while she had some power in the relationship, Phillip had the bigger share and the final word. But this was the only way she had found she could survive. And part of her reached out to Buddy. Because if she could make sure he would make it and survive this, then she could too. She wasn't alone, and that gave her hope.

Meanwhile Buddy was laying in bed and staring up at his ceiling, ignoring the tears streaking the sides of his head. How did he not see that Violet was just as much of a prisoner that he was? He remembered the lengths he kept his own employees under surveillance and his gut was screaming at him that that was nothing compared to the lengths Phillip probably went to. If he had to bet- he would bet her place was at least bugged. Phillip probably kept her watched so closely. To the point she probably felt like she couldn't breathe without Phillip knowing about it. The poor thing was just used to it by now. What could he do to help her though? This was the true challenge. How to get them both out of this alive.

Even if after her time here was up, if  she was able to disappear and he never saw her again- but she could have a life of freedom and never be watched ever again. That would be enough for him. He just needed to think outside the box.

[boydgearloose]

A Very Long and Very Convoluted Gyro Gearloose Season 3 Theory

Hey everyone! Either by sheer impatience from the hiatus or genuine brainpower or maybe a mix of both, I’ve pieced together a really long, convoluted theory for season 3. It still has a few holes but I don’t think they’re anything that could be filled in until we have a lot more information, so I’m not too worried about that. As expected, it’s very Gyro-centric and started because I was thinking too hard about one thing in particular. I’m really not expecting anyone to read this but without further ado, let’s get to that thing first!

Who will Gyro interact with the most in season 3?

That’s the question that REALLY started to make me think.

This was a huge shock to me, especially since I thought Gyro would be interacting with Fenton the most in season 3 by what we do know. The “spoilers” made me think that it would be someone we haven’t met yet but then, it was revealed that this character has already been in the show. I started to go over the options in my head because there really aren’t many that make sense.

I don’t believe it’s a character that Gyro’s already interacted with a lot, like Fenton, Lil Bulb, Manny, Scrooge or even Huey. Frank probably would have been able to say that since it’s something we’re all expecting. Therefore, it’s either someone he’s either never interacted with or someone he’s interacted with a little but not a lot. I find it unlikely that it’s another character who already has prior commitments in season 3 (Gandra has Fenton, Beakley has Black Heron, etc.) and I doubt it’s any of the kids if it’s not Huey because Frank said Gyro gets along with Huey the best.

It could be Della but while I would love to see her interact with Gyro, I doubt they’d interact more than him and Fenton. Same with Fethry. I’ve seen Ludwig brought up since him and Gyro are both scientists and that would also be great, but I’m not sure how that would work out. I know Ludwig could be alive but I feel like he’s much more connected to the Scrooge and Beakley FOWL arc than to Gyro. There’s also Bradford and the other FOWL agents we’ve met so far. However, like Ludwig, I feel like they’re already all accounted for. Bradford is Scrooge’s villain, Steelbeak is likely a Darkwing villain, Rockerduck and Jeeves are also Scrooge villains (maybe Goldie or even Glomgold) and Black Heron is a Beakley villain. The only one not accounted for so far is Phantom Blot, but I find it more likely that he’ll be paired with someone like Duckworth (given the whole “blot out phantoms” thing Frank talked about) or even Goofy, which I see as the most likely for him but that’s another theory post to be made.

Then who is it?

Unfortunately, many won’t really like the answer I’ve come up with and I’m concerned about it too as this post will explain but it seems to be the most likely. Gyro will probably interact with Mark Beaks the most in season 3. Out of all the characters, he’s the only one that fits everything. He’s had ties to Gyro before but not enough for the answer to not be a spoiler, it wouldn’t be super out of left field for them to have a lot of interaction and Mark doesn’t really have any prior commitments that aren’t tied to Gyro. There’s Fenton, sure, but Frank said he interacts with Darkwing and Gandra the most so it almost seems like Mark’s taking a backburner when it comes to him (thank god honestly).

Upon this realization, I began to reflect on something Frank said a while back that we haven’t really seen a lot of.

Of course, Mark is a Gizmoduck villain. But why was Gyro specified here? I wouldn’t call Mark a Gyro villain at this point in the show, yet it seems to be implied that he’s just as much of a villain to Gyro as he is to Gizmoduck. Then I started wondering if this might refer to stuff we haven’t seen yet.

Something Frank said in the #RewriteHistory thread kind of points toward this as well. He called Mark’s rivalry with Fenton a “happy accident,” meaning that it wasn’t something that was planned initially and that he’d expand on that later.

The thread hasn’t gotten to Dangerous Chemistry yet, but there hasn’t even been anything of the sort about how that happened in the rundowns for BUDDY System and Who Is Gizmoduck so I honestly believe the “later” here means after season 3 or at least certain episodes. In that case, if Mark wasn’t meant to be a Gizmoduck villain, then why was he created in the first place? He’s 100% a Ducktales original and doesn’t really serve much of a purpose right now outside of his rivalry with Gizmoduck. Therefore, I believe he was initially created to rival Gyro.

Also, Mark has been tied to Gyro in some pretty interesting ways. There was the part in Glomtales, while I know it was mostly a joke, where he was eager to fight Gyro. And it really wouldn’t have been that hard to have them interact in the episode. So why wasn’t Gyro there? Could it be building up to more? It’s also worth noting that Mark’s technology only works when it’s linked up to something Gyro created. We saw this with BUDDY, the thing he put on the Gizmoduck suit, his app for hacking Gyro’s security system and possibly even Boyd which Frank said would also be explored in season 3. Of course, this could be from the stolen blueprints he got from the message board but I think it’s still worth noting.

So, how do they interact in season 3? That’s what I’m here to explain.

Gyro’s Treatment of Fenton

One big thing that Frank has hinted at being explained in the future is why Gyro treats Fenton the way he does.

This hasn’t been explored at all but seeing that Gyro is getting focus this season, I think it’s finally time. I’ve always wondered exactly what his problems with Fenton were because there seems to be a lot more there than just annoyance. For starters, Gyro is very sensitive to having his information stolen or tampered with by anyone, especially Fenton. We see this a lot in BUDDY System and Who Is Gizmoduck when Fenton tries to use the Gizmoduck armor. He even wanted to destroy the Gizmoduck armor entirely, something he worked VERY hard on, just so it wouldn’t “fall into the wrong hands.” This is definitely a reaction based on experience.

Speaking of BUDDY System, he seems to have an idea that Mark is using his tech right off the bat. As soon as Dewey tells him that Mark made BUDDY, he reacts with a lot of rage and confusion. Fenton mentions that Gyro has been stressed trying to figure out how Mark beat him to the self-driving car. He also showed up to the presentation even though he wasn’t invited. Plus, Mark made that one cut-out of him. You know the one. These two are very familiar with each other.

Gyro also seems to dislike having an intern. This could be brushed off as him just not being a people person but paired with everything else, I think it’s worth noting. Putting this all together, it seems as if he had a bad experience with both having his technology stolen and having an assistant.

Remember FOWL Gyro?

Yeah, that one theory my friend @bluebiirdys​ came up with and I wrote out a long time ago that got insanely popular. I want to bring it up for a bit and talk about how it connects to this as well. If any of the season 1 villains have ties to FOWL, it’s Mark. His relationship with Gandra seemed very familiar. Although she doesn’t like him (who would?), their interactions really felt like they know each other past her using him for funding and resources. He also referred to her as “Agent D,” which feels like an inside name. And when Gandra claims she was only using him, she pauses beforehand and seems unsure of what she’s about to say. Seeing that she hid a lot of things from Fenton and made up other stuff in that scene, it wouldn’t be a surprise if she also hid how she knows Mark. Also, Mark wouldn’t have been able to hire an agent if he didn’t have some kind of ties to FOWL itself. They’re a super lowkey organization that I feel like a lot of people aren’t aware of.

While I don’t feel like Mark is really an agent in the same way that Gandra is, he definitely works for or alongside FOWL and probably has been doing so for a long time. There’s a big chance that they could be the reason why he’s so popular and maintains that despite literally everything awful he does. Frank even said he’s not still rich, so where is he getting the money to keep his company going? Waddle itself could be some kind of inside job but again, that feels like a theory for another day. This is about Gyro.

If Gyro worked for FOWL and Mark is currently working for FOWL, they could have very well known each other during his time there. Frank said that Gyro is younger than Donald and Della, who are both confirmed to be 36. If we’re going off of what’s presumed to be his birth year in Mark’s username, Mark would currently be 30. This means that Gyro is rather close to his age, maybe one or two years older. They very well could have known each other. And I can’t see Mark being that much older than Fenton. Therefore, they probably have about the same age difference.

This brings us to the main point of this post: I believe that Mark was Gyro’s assistant when he worked at FOWL and betrayed him during their time together. How does this work? Well, I have a small idea. Again, this does have a few holes in it that can’t be filled until we have a lot more information on season 3, but I’ve come up with a bare minimum.

I still feel like Gyro worked for FOWL pretty much his whole life. While he definitely had mentors there, it was never a very loving environment for him. Therefore, he’s been pretty starved for any kind of friendship and isolated. Similarly, Mark was probably a total loser at this age and also didn’t grow up in a good environment by what we’ve seen, including these asks.

Plus, we all know about the “Coach Dad” thing. If Mark’s home life was really that bad, I can see him running away at a young age, maybe around 18. He is a very impulsive person so this wouldn’t be out of character. Going off of what we know about Gandra, it seems that FOWL tries to recruit younger people with an interest in inventing who feel misunderstood. Mark is this to a T. He would definitely join FOWL in a heartbeat.

Since he would have been relatively young, he probably would have been assigned to help someone else. That someone could be slightly older by a year or two and a person who has worked there for a long time. Gyro would be the perfect fit. And going off of what we do know about Mark, I can imagine a younger and not-as-awful-yet version of him being similar to Fenton: overly talkative, into everything Gyro is doing, enthusiastic, etc. This could be where Gyro’s distaste of Fenton comes from.

Mark also shares some common ground with Gyro in a way that I can easily see them hitting it off. He’d be the first person Gyro would really have a chance to connect with, someone to share his work with and just talk to. On the other side, Gyro is the first person to give Mark his undivided attention and make him feel wanted. They would probably form a pretty closely knit friendship. Then, what happened? What would ruin such a bond? If you don’t know the answer already, it’s definitely Mark’s arrogance and need for attention.

His greatest downfall throughout the series has been how badly he needs attention from other people to thrive. Frank has even hinted that he’ll never be satisfied until he has some kind of place in the spotlight.

Therefore, Gyro had to make him feel lesser and divert his attention to something else. That something else could be a big project that he was assigned to work on. The more he works on this, the less time he has to spend with Mark who now considers him a very close friend. This makes Mark feel like he isn’t getting enough attention and in turn, he starts to secretly resent Gyro and realize that he has a much higher status than him at FOWL. He will start to long to move up in rank more than he will long for Gyro’s attention. Like Frank said, nothing can fill his needs for long and he always wants more.

So what would Gyro be working on during this? Well, FOWL does seem to have some pretty sinister plans for this season. It’s likely they could have assigned Gyro to make some sort of doomsday device that would cause destruction so large and awful, that a big part of Duckburg or even the planet would be destroyed. I’m not sure if it’s related but see my very small and poorly put-together Chaos God theory. It could be something to do with that, but for now we’ll just refer to it as the “doomsday device.”

Gyro doesn’t really know exactly what he’s making or at least doesn’t understand the consequences of it fully until one day when he overhears the higher-ups discussing something about it. This terrifies him and really makes him realize what’s going to happen if he finishes building this thing. In a panic, Gyro will decide to defect from FOWL. He wants to run away and leave no trace of himself there and make his own life somewhere else, finding a mundane inventing job that won’t have him invent something that could wipe out the entire world. However, he’s not going to leave his close friend behind. Gyro confides in Mark about everything he knows as well as his plans, wanting him to go with him. Mark agrees that they’ll leave in a few days and everything seems as okay as it can be…that is, until Gyro wakes up the next morning to find that Mark ratted his plans out to the higher-ups because he knew it would get him Gyro’s status in FOWL since he’s his assistant.

Devastated and hurt and in so much danger, Gyro manages to run away on his own and escape. He also manages to take a vital part of the machine that he created with him, hoping that it will stop them from going forth with whatever destruction they planned to cause. After fleeing, Gyro finds Scrooge, gets hired by him, everything goes as normal. But he always has that one part of the machine hidden away somewhere in his lab and wonders if anyone will ever try to steal it. He starts to get suspicious when he sees how popular Mark is becoming, yet knows he can’t say anything to anyone or else it’ll be known that he created this awful thing. Gyro lives in fear of Mark telling everyone too, especially since he has such a high following or worse, coming after the part of the machine that he took with him. But for now, he’s safe…

Nah. Of course he isn’t. That machine’s definitely gonna come back in season 3 if all of this is true, let’s be real. Frank called the Gyro episode in season 3 massive.

That means it’s going to affect more than just Gyro. So how?

Let’s go back for a bit to Dangerous Chemistry. There’s a big part of it that remains vague to this day: what exactly were Gandra and Mark planning to do? MegaBeaks wasn’t supposed to happen. Mark was only supposed to get a little jacked but even then, he wouldn’t have been able to have that much power over Fenton. Plus, Gandra was pissed when he hulked out, tried to kill Fenton and ran away with the kids yet she still seemed determine to let him get away, shocking Gizmoduck so he could continue as if it were part of the plan all along. She also got rid of Gyro. Funny how he was unconscious throughout the entire episode, as if him being there and fully aware of what was going on would have caused a plot hole. As mentioned in the Gyro FOWL theory post, he seemed to know what was going on too but couldn’t outright say so without telling people his secret.

My main confusion comes from what Gandra says while shocking MegaBeaks near the end of the episode about how hurting Fenton wasn’t part of their plan. If they wanted to steal the Gizmoduck suit, then wouldn’t they have to hurt Fenton? How could they have possibly gotten away with it without doing that? When you really look at it, the plan doesn’t seem to be about Gizmoduck at all. Instead, Gandra wanted to distract Gizmoduck, not hurt him. Mark just got power hungry and basically ruined everything.

Then what was the plan? Well, another thing worth noting is that Gandra knew the lab she was going to. If she knew Mark and his information on Fenton, she knew it wasn’t his lab but Gyro’s instead. She also wanted Fenton to show her everything in the lab and kept urging him to show her his work. It really seemed like she was looking for something and trying to get as much information about where that thing was until her and Mark were able to get both Gyro and Fenton out of the picture. There was also the moment where she peaked under the lampshade to get a look at Lil Bulb, which was very cute but also more proof of her checking out every inch of Gyro’s lab and technology.

Gandra was there for something but we don’t know what. It could very well be the part of the machine that Gyro created while he was at FOWL. They’re planning to reactivate it in order to stop the McDuck family once and for all. They just need that one piece. As Frank said, Bradford has been plotting for a long time and now, he’s finally going into action to put together his final plan.

So…will they get it?

This is very up in the air but I will give you my two cents. Since Frank described the Gyro episode as massive, I’m expecting something related to the overall plot in it as well as his backstory. The plot of season 3 is definitely related to FOWL, as well all know. Therefore, I think they’re going to get the piece he has back in that episode, completing all they need to activate the machine. But…how?

Let’s go back to how Gyro treats Fenton. Assuming that he does this because he reminds him of his past experiences with Mark, it’s clear that Gyro feels guilt over what happened. He probably feels like he failed Mark despite everything and part of him wants to reach out again. It’s really hard to watch your first friend turn into such an awful person and Gyro knows more about Mark than literally anyone else, probably some pretty upsetting stuff that makes him want to fix everything he thinks he caused.

That being said, Mark is very good at manipulation. Let’s say Gyro had a chance to reach out to his old assistant, someone he feels like he’s wronged, one more time and let him know how wonderful it feels to be free of FOWL and to have a family and make him understand that he’s being used, bound to face the same consequences as the ones FOWL are against once they’re done with their plans. For a second, it looks like Mark is listening to him…but he’s not going to change. He’s way too far gone and it’s not Gyro’s fault at all. But I don’t think Gyro will ever realize this until the part of the machine is in Mark’s hands. I wouldn’t be surprised if he used him one last time to get what he needed for what he sees as positive attention.

Wow, this got long. Anyway, that’s about all I have so far. I’m sure I’ll think of a lot of other stuff before season 3 actually airs and if I have another realization, I’ll probably add onto this. But this is enough. I hope you all enjoyed reading this (if anyone even did LOL) and have it be known that this will be all I’m able to think about until the hiatus ends.

[futurecardbuddyfight]

— RP blogs please don’t reblog

It’s very interesting that Kiri, as the Grim Reaper, has the power to take away people’s buddy monsters.  Without their partners, they are alone.  He’s inflicting the same pain he felt upon others — and he wanted people to feel as he did; alone and abandoned and left in the cold.  This is especially true in the fight against Gao, where the Grim Reaper is excited at the mere prospect of taking away Drum and leaving Gao broken subsequently.

The Grim Reaper also made a promise towards the entire group that went looking for him that he’d be back to take away their buddies too in due time — which, the only two with buddies were Gao and Kazane; Tasuku had Jack and his entire deck confiscated already.  I’m sure Kiri was aware of this, but how is not so clear.  Considering he didn’t see Jack with Tasuku and the fact that the former buddy police officer couldn’t seem to actually be able to stop him probably clued him in that something must have happened.  This, or he was simply informed by one of the members of Disaster / in a Disaster meeting — it’s even possible that Shido just bragged about the state of the buddy police force with his father having infiltrated it or that Davide casually told him that they couldn’t get in his way, and the fact that the force wasn’t doing anything to stop him or to warn the public about the Grim Reaper said a lot too.  I’m sure he was told in some manner honestly because I don’t see why he wouldn’t be trusted with this information, but if not, he’d be able to piece it together quickly from mere observation.  Anyways, the point is that the Grim Reaper knew that Tasuku was powerless to stop him, and his threat held a lot of weight being towards those two, but it was also possibly a snide comment towards Tasuku as Kiri was likely jealous of his friendship and rivalry with Gao ( not that Kyoya would have allowed the Reaper to fight Tasuku honestly. )  It makes it sound like the Reaper was going to now specifically target people in Gao’s circle of friends, having started with Zanya ( coincidentally or not, but I’m certain the Reaper figured the son of the police commissioner would have tried to take matters into his hands and personally hunt him down eventually, considering everything he said to Zanya before their fight ), in order to hurt Gao as much as possible before Gao himself — and that would have made Tasuku feel more powerless than he already did in that moment.  It could honestly be augured that this isn’t the case too, because I definitely tend to read too deeply into things, but I’d at least say it undoubtedly fits the mindset Kiri was trapped in currently.

I also want to detail that what the Grim Reaper does also needs to be viewed as Kiri taking away the things from people that he felt he never had, in more than the sense of friendship.  He’s replicating another emotion he felt in others — hopelessness.  His deck aims to leave his opponents devastated and helpless, but most importantly, that aforementioned hopelessness.  Forcing them to watch as everything they fought for to keep was in vain, that they can’t do anything to save their precious bond from being severed.  Something Kiri has experienced far too many times being forgotten by the people he thought cared about him ( and subconsciously recalling at least the feeling of harrowing heartache gained from loss in repressed memories, furthering his resolve without being aware of his true self — it makes sense because we do get shades and hints of / about Miserea peeking through when Kiri takes the dark core deck case. )

I’m going to bring in the line from Hundred, where Kiri stated that he had been jealous of Noboru’s friendship with Gao.  It’s definitely implied in season one in my eyes and I don’t think this came from nowhere.  There’s a parallel we can make between them — we can compare their moving scenes.  Both moves go unmentioned by the boys, but in Kiri’s case, he really had meant to mention it before being interrupted by the action of a buddyfight, and after he loses his fight against Kazane, he just can’t anymore.  He was so desperate to be remembered, to be worth something to his friends, and he felt he had to win that battle to accomplish all of that — but he lost, and therefore failed.  Again and again all he could do was lose.

I also feel Kiri wondered — worried — about the scenario of moving.  I mean, as often as Kiri has moved around, he’s probably wondered about how Gao, Kuguru and Baku would react to him leaving.  Which would be something he tried to push out of his head because it was painful to think about, until Noboru’s own move forced it back into the forefront of his mind.  Witnessing how people saw him off to America, being a part of that sendoff as well, put a fear in his mind.  ‘ Would... They all see me off like they did Noboru-kun? ’  I think he was terrified that they wouldn’t, but there’s also another side to that as well:  ‘ Has anyone ever seen me off like that? ’  And the answer was no, no one ever did, which only made him more scared and reaffirmed the first worry.  In his own situation, he never wanted to find out whether or not his friends would send him off with such love, because too many times it’s been proven to him that he’ll always end up alone and that he’s not significant enough to be remembered.  And in his defeat to Kazane, he only proved to himself that he really was worthless, that there was no point in remembering him — who would want to?  He felt that buddyfight was his last chance, and he failed miserably.

Not only that, but let’s revisit the fact that Kiri and Noboru essentially did the same exact thing — they never told anyone they were moving, and though already mentioned, while Kiri had meant to, that’s not the point here.  Gao didn’t at all react with the same heartbroken anger that he had with Noboru, nor was he upset at Kiri when he saw him again, challenged to a buddyfight.  I think Kiri’s mind would have twisted this fact to something it wasn’t, because he’s prone to letting his thoughts and worries fester and his brain is all too cruel.  I think it made Kiri feel like he and Gao really hadn’t been friends, because if they were, why didn’t Gao react the same way?  He would have reacted the same if they truly were friends, right?  Did Gao really not care...?  Now, it all just feels confirmed to Kiri — that he really never actually had friends, and it led him further down this dark path.

Returning to the Grim Reaper and now how these insecurities created him, the mere alias itself is also an interesting detail of that.  Kiri states that he will never “go back to being that weakling ever again,” and next time we see him, he’s no longer Kiri Hyoryu, but the Grim Reaper.  This is also especially important to note because this line comes after his loss against Gao — the first loss he’s had since taking the dark core deck case.  Then and there after that buddyfight, Kiri abandons his old self completely.  Even when Gao calls out to him by his name after this event ( the confrontation at Disaster headquarters ) and in trying to save him, the Reaper even outright states that he’s no longer “Kiri” anymore, because Kiri was weak and pathetic, everything he no longer is — everything the Grim Reaper wasn’t.  Kiri Hyoryu wouldn’t be remembered, was never significant, but the Grim Reaper certainly would be.  Kiri Hyoryu is dead, and in his place, the Grim Reaper stands; someone who hasn’t lost to anyone, and someone who has become strong in solitude.

[lucky-dreamfisher]

Weekly Asks #19 - DCTL Spoilers

In a game with cartoons coming to life, that’s certainly possible!

It reminds me of one scene in DCTL: Joey and Buddy are having a dinner, and Joey begins to monologue about life being an Illusion and his wish of “rewriting the rules” and “taking control of his own destiny”, which sounds pretty meta. Buddy then jokes that the dinner they’re eating is an illusion as well, and Joey has a… reaction. 

“He leaned forward and bent over and was laughing so hard, tears were coming out of his eyes, but the sound of laughter wasn’t.”

It would be interesting if this was a hint that he’s fully aware of the fact that he’s a fictional character, rebelling against his fate.

Good catch! According to the newspaper article in the Handbook (dated as 1946, same year as the novel) a bunch of animators quit because of the poor working conditions in the studio, yet Dot claims some people quit because they didn't want to have a female boss. 

Maybe it's a combination of both things? The conditions were objectively poor, and Miss Lambert's promotion was simply the last straw for some people? Of course, the newspaper wouldn't write about employees quitting for sexist reasons, it wouldn't look good.

Henry could be any of these three. I wouldn't be so sure about his other personality being good though! As Halfusek pointed out, in Chapter 4 Henry is implied to have died in the elevator fall, yet we don't see him come out of a statue. And the nearest statue has these creepy Lost Ones which appear to be frozen in fear of something coming out of the statue. It's entirely possible that it was his inksona that did this to all these Lost Ones. Which could mean that Henry… may even be the One-Eyed Bendy.

Very troubling!

The Projectionist was never imprinted with anything. Joey specifically said that he can’t imprint him, because the ink consumed Norman’s soul before Joey found him. 

I suspect that his soul was kinda floating in the ink, until one day the ink dripped onto a projector, which was an object that had a personal value to Norman, his essence. 

This may have allowed his soul to latch onto the projector and and form a body around it. The same probably happened with Bertrum and the octopus ride, and Johnny and the organ.

(as for the other questions, we’ll have to wait and see)

Bendy is described in the book as an animal, specifically a cat.

There is some evidence that he was indeed mistreated, beyond just being locked up. Look up my posts on the true source behind the ink for more details.

Of course, if Bendy is Joey, or even part-Joey, you are essentially feeling sorry for Joey Drew right now ;)

Heavenly Toys was built in the 30s and Storage 9 was in the book. Both happened before the Theater. In fact, the Theater isn’t even inside the studio, it’s in the building next to it. We don’t see it in batim, though I have no doubt it will make an appearance in batdr.

It’s all the more baffling, considering that Buddy’s death made national news. The ”Local Artist Pushed Himself Too Hard, Found Dead At Desk” headline was likely referring to Buddy’s death - unlike Henry, Buddy is actually a local,. Also, Dot complains at one point about Buddy “always pushing”.

In the novel, police came also looking for Sammy after he went missing, and in the Handbook, the studio was under investigation. No idea how Joey managed to get away with it all. Maybe he served the policemen ink-spiced drinks and they’re all now under mind-control as well?

Henry’s definitely an ink creature, so a Bendy form would suit him for sure. I doubt we’ll meet Henry in the next game though. It would be very hard to involve Henry without making batdr a sequel to batim.

It’s certainly possible that more perfect toons exist. But they’d definitely have human souls in them.

 Redraw what? I’m not sure what you mean, sorry.

Dot’s fate is still uncertain. Unless you mean BATDR protagonist? She was never imprinted with anything (yet!), so she’s probably closer to Sammy and/or the Lost Ones. However, Joey implied that a person has to be imprinted to avoid having their souls be devoured by the ink, so I’m hoping the game will give us a choice between imprinting her with Alice or with Bendy to save her soul.

That's just one weird line, which doesn't really fit in with anything in particular. Apparently, the yellow world is referred to as "Bendy's Domain" in the Handbook.

This would imply it’s indeed an alternate dimension, of Bendy’s creation.

Maybe? But in this case he would have to have as many Sammy-traits as he has Joey traits, because Sammy's been having visions about the Ink Demon for 30 years. There’s probably more to it. I suspect an exchange of ink is necessary. Sammy’s been drinking Bendy’s ink, but Bendy hasn’t been drinking his. He may have had some of Joey’s though.

He rips Dave's arm off, so he has the strength to kill. Buddy says that he acts like a cat torturing a mouse - using enough strength to hurt them, but not so much as to kill her at once if he doesn’t wish it. I guess he pushed Buddy, because he was on the way, he wasn't thinking of killing him in that moment. With Henry, however, he went straight for the kill, except in Chapter 4.

The novel is clear about the fact that Joey is not in control. I don't think it's just an Easter Egg though, Joey claims that the soul is inside the heart, so Susie probably stole Boris's soul to turn him into Brute Boris.

Depends if he ever got imprinted or not. I’m guessing no, if he transformed inside his office. If he was, then he might be a Striker - all these extra arms are good for writing the messages on the walls of his office, and the sewed up mouth could be a symbolical punishment for spilling out company secrets in the audio logs.

Another, slightly less likely possibility, is that he is Tom. I once speculated that “Allison” and “Tom” are merely personas that Grant and Lacie assumed to trick Henry into killing the ink demon and continuing the loop. It’s less likely now with the suspicious way human!Allison has been acting.

I hope you're right.

Only if by "bad choices" you mean the choice to follow Dot XD

Jacob didn't strike me as particularly similar to any Butcher Gang character, tbh.

[sparda3g]

Food Wars! Shokugeki no Soma Chapter 253 Review

It’s finally here. It is the 5th and Final Bout that will bring the closure to this regime of Azami. That is if Soma and Erina win and judging the moment that happened here, all I can say is, “Well, it was a good run while it lasted.” In all seriousness, this was a pretty amusing calm before storm chapter that got me excited to see the conclusion for more reasons than one.

Admittedly, I jumped the gun in the last chapter review because I declared the next bout will be a tag team match with Elite Ten Council versus Rebel Alliance; also known as Pairing War (and I do mean by “that”). Thankfully, Senzaemon meant what he said that doesn’t make my claim entirely false. However, the next bout format is changed and it is actually pretty interesting.

While I thought it was a joy to see the competitors dish out intriguing variety of meal, it has gone on for a while that I was mainly interested in characters. That probably explain the last two cards were done the way they did. Fortunately, it rejuvenated my interest with the style of a two-dish course. It hasn’t been done in the series, so this is a nice change-up.

What’s also good is this will be a better believable way to conclude without resorting to far more than a miracle of defeating the best of the best. The two-dish course is basically everyday restaurant routine: first, serve an appetizer, and then, the main dish. This solely relies on teamwork that their dish must complement each other to receive the best possible grade. That is one way to defeat the odds, so Soma can defeat Tsukasa here...right?

To make things even better, there will be no theme ingredient. It’s practically “give everything you got” concept. This is how Senzaemon sees it as a true gourmet. I’m beginning to see his master plan and why he agreed for Azami to take over the judge position. It helps with Azami getting a bit curious of his father-in-law’s agenda. He’s getting way too comfortable for his own good.

One of my favorite moments is the conflict between Azami and Erina, along with extras. He thought he could put her own daughter down easily by insulting her for never able to achieve true gourmet. Father of the year, everyone! Thankfully, Erina isn’t going to be damsel in distress, because she has bloom to a stronger character.

It’s wonderful to see her developed from her breakdown. I can still hear the distant echo saying that we will be stuck with her being a “villain” and always target Soma to lose. Not only she has made great friends, she is more open to be her own self rather being enslaved by her father. No longer a girl who was trapped by one manipulated philosophy; now comes forth a strong will independent woman. She won’t be converted to the “good girl” that only he prefers.

I said, “along with extras,” because the one simple panel got me not laughing but reminded me why I can’t be that upset with the series. As great and charming it was for Erina to stand up, her friends react gently, including Soma. Then we have a reality check that can be compared to abridged series writing and it was gold.

The truth is that she was never much of a good girl to begin with; at least to Soma. Sure, it might be his ego talking, but that moment is probably something fan would think and call out on the flaw of her speech. The thing is Tsukuda acknowledged it and that’s what makes it funnier. One mind think alike and use it as a comedy skit can do more than saving a moment. Hisako adding in was icing the cake. Hell, she is the one that pours in the endless cycle of tea, even behind bar. Ah, that is why you are number 2 in the popularity poll and that is a compliment. That’s why Soma keeps drinking like its endless refill. That was marvelous.

I don’t know what Azami is rambling about back at the dorm or whatever fancy he is sleeping at. It sounds like he truly believes he got this win in the bag with Erina being his forever puppet. I certainly look forward to see the real outcome blow his face away. That said I don’t want to try to think about those judges at the bed implies here. If anything, it only makes him the greatest villain of all Shounen series. After all, it is a Shounen genre. Hint, hint.

Anyway, the calm before storm scenery ensue with everyone preparing to help Soma and Erina. It’s a good thing that Kuga is there to minimize the helping hands since logic goes that too many cooks can spoil the broth. So he let the first years, Takumi and Megumi, to help and Isshiki to give out some advices; in his undies no less. Isn’t it snowy outside still or not? Kuga is a nice fellow that also developed well to a trusting buddy.

Soma and Erina spent the night to work out a tactic before the final bout begins. It’s a nice added detail with everyone still couldn’t sleep with everything on the line. The vibe of all or nothing is stacking up well. At least with Erina being there, they won’t be foolish enough to think of a plan in the last minute…right?

I don’t know what Tsukasa means when he feels like he is at the top of his game, but I would have assume this is Tsukuda’s way of saying that he will lose at his peak. On the other hand, it is also possible that it is his way to say that Tsukasa is at his best but still has to rely on Rindou, so if her dish doesn’t complement perfectly, then it doesn’t matter. I laugh at the detail of Urara no longer being a “female dog,” thanks to Momo’s syrup. Ah, this battle will be kinder than I imagined. And then, we got this scene…

My absolute favorite moment begins with the final hype for the Rebel Alliance to take the grand stage and compete in the final bout. No one knows who is taking on who, though I had my money on Soma versus Tsukasa because main character policy 101. First came out Takumi and Megumi in their tired/exhausted state that looks like they are ready to knock their head off. Then our beloved pair appears and good God, they are tired but more or less determined to battle. Naturally, I thought the comedy ends with them just being so tired but ready with a plan. They have one though…

Rock, paper, scissor…

Isshiki, whatever happened to those offers for a new place to stay at? We’re going to need them to decide their next spot.

Joking aside (irony), I did laugh so much that I legit face palmed hard. I can’t believe they put their entire world on the line with the game that only screams, “They have no plan after that but to wing it…” It’s hilarious though, including Soma actually lost the battle. No doubt this was a fun treat to pairing and general fans. At this point, it’s a crime for them not to be together by the end. Fun fact: I found out that it could be a running gag that Soma will always lose to Erina in rock, paper, scissor game.

That’s just fantastic.

I am surprised that Soma will take on Rindou, despite a suggestive hint from the last chapter. To begin with, Soma is up against Rindou. At least I am spared from Goddess Deathmatch that I don’t want to root for one to lose. Now I can selfishly root for Soma to lose. I guess I’m more surprised on the fact that Erina is taking on Tsukasa. Maybe Soma is right to question on his main character status.

The stunning part that I actually seen people seem to misread is that there is no more bout after this. Soma will not take over and go against Tsukasa if she loses. In other words, Erina is headlining this bout. No way! A heroine headlining in a Shounen series?! Inconceivable! Yes, I am mocking the haters. Anyway, I am aware that this is her character arc, but the fact she’s ending this one big is rather awesome. I mean Soma would technically beat Tsukasa but it won’t be “enough” to his view. It’s going to suck more if Erina takes first seat. I can already imagine…

This was a pretty fun chapter to read with nice showcase of character’s growth. The art is all around solid with the impact of Erina standing up against her father and plenty of comical visual including rock, paper, scissor. The final bout is finally set. It’s now wife versus other’s husband bout. Let’s get it on!

[whitewitchdani]

The White Witch: Chapter 17

Read Chapter 16 Here

Word Count: 2,343

Pairing: Sam x OC Evelyn Singer

Warnings: mentions of sex, language, canon typical violence, implied character death

A/N: Chapter 17 is finally here! Sorry chapters have been coming out so slowly but I graduate in 3 weeks! Finally! lol. So chapters should start coming out more steadily then. I hope you guys enjoy and as always feedback is welcome and let me know if you’d like to be tagged!

The White Witch Masterlist

The next morning, Sam and Evie entered the kitchen to see Dean sitting at the table with Castiel. Dean couldn’t help but notice a difference between his brother and his friend, it seemed like they always had to be touching each other in some way. 

When they sat across from Dean and Cas at the table, Dean smirked. He knew exactly what had caused the new closeness in the couple and couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tease them. “So, how was your night you two?”

They both looked up and then at each other, both smiling a little. “It was fine,” said Evie around a mouth of cereal. 

“Just fine?” Dean said wiggling his eyebrows.

“What are you trying to get at Dean?” Sam asked annoyed.

“I believe Dean is trying to hint at the fact that you and Evelyn engaged in intercourse last night.”

Sam’s eyes went wide and Evie choked on the bite of cereal she had in her mouth. He hit his girlfriend on the back a few times until she waved him off, assuring him she was fine. They both shot Dean daggers, as he couldn’t stop laughing in his seat. 

“I’m sensing awkwardness. I do not understand why. Evelyn you were quite vocal, Dean and I heard you in the library. It is obvious you enjoyed yourself; you should not be embarrassed. It is a beautiful human action.”

Evelyn went completely red and stood from her place at the table, “Well, now that I’m completely mortified I’m just going to-,” she gestured with her thumb to the door. She made her way to the sink while Sam hit his still-laughing brother in the shoulder. 

Suddenly there was a loud crash. The men in the room turned to the sound to see Evie’s bowl shattered on the floor and the huntress hunched over the sink, gripping the counter. The men rushed to her aide, Sam and Cas on each side and Dean in front. 

“Evie?” Sam asked as he gently touched her back. 

After no response, he grabbed her arm and spun her around. All three men were flabbergasted at what they saw: Evie staring straight ahead with a blank expression, but no pupils. Just like when she performed the tracking spell, her eyes were completely white. 

“What the hell?” asked Sam incredulously. 

“I have no idea, but I don’t like it. Cas, any ideas?”

“I am not completely certain, but I believe she is having a premonition of some sort.”

“Premonition? You mean a vision? She can do that?” Sam moved a piece of hair from her face as he spoke; he was incredibly worried. It seemed like Evie couldn’t catch a break. First what had just happened with Sorath, and now this?

“I have never seen it before in her kind, but with the wealth of power she possesses I suppose anything is possible.”

The men looked on for a few seconds before Dean broke the silence, “How long is this gonna last? We can’t just stand here. Cas can’t you do something?”

The angel sighed, “Possibly. I could try to enter her mind and find where the vision is taking place, try to tap into it as a third party viewer of sorts. But it is not certain, and it can be dangerous.”

Dean looked at his brother with a silent question. He knew what he wanted to do, but Evie was Sam’s girlfriend and it ultimately came down to him.

Sam sighed, “Alright, lets do it.”

They managed to move Evie into the library, sitting her down in one of the chairs by the table. Sam kneeled next to her while Dean looked on from the sidelines, he didn’t want to crowd Cas for whatever it was he was about to do.  

Castiel approached Evie from behind mentally preparing himself for his task. Sifting through a human’s brain was no easy task and Evelyn’s brain was in hyperdrive from channeling the vision; he had to do this just right. 

The angel took a deep breath and set his fingers on Evie’s temples, closing his eyes. Before he began he opened them again turning to Sam, “Just like before, do not pull either of us out of the process, it could be dangerous. When I find her consciousness I will attempt to pull it back to the forefront.”

Sam took a deep breath and grabbed Evie’s hand, “Just help her Cas. Whatever she’s seeing in there can’t be good.”

Castiel nodded and closed his eyes once more. Focusing on Evie in a spiritual sense, and not her physical form, he was able to enter mind. In the bunker, Castiel’s eyes opened and flashed bright blue with his grace as Evie’s head dropped back, and he successfully began his journey. 

In Evie’s head, however, Castiel opened his eyes to see a rundown barn looming in front of him. He looked around and saw that it seemed to be situated in the middle of nowhere. He began to walk forward, looking around to see if there was anything of import to find. 

“Cas?”

He whipped around as he heard his name and saw Evie standing behind him, looking a little worse for wear. She looked exhausted and her clothes were disheveled. She moved forward and wrapped the angel in a hug, something she desperately needed after the day she was having.

“Evelyn, what is happening?” he asked as he stepped back from the hug, holding his friend at arms length.

“Honestly? I’m not really sure. I know I’ve seen visions of things that have already happened, but I think some of it hasn’t happened yet too. I’m really confused, psychic abilities aren’t nature-based. Why is this happening?”

“I’m not sure, but we can figure it out later. What have you seen?”

Evie drew a shaky breath, “Cas, I saw them die. I saw them ALL die.” 

He placed his hand on her arm, “Who, Evie?”

“My people. The White Witches. When the new coven was hunted down in Colorado Springs by who I’m assuming was Sorath. I don’t know why but I saw their deaths, including my mothers.” 

Cas sighed, “I’m sorry Evelyn, that must have been difficult for you.”

“Yeah, it was. But the thing is, these visions keep looping. I know what’s inside that barn, and I know it’s in the future. But for some reason, I can’t break myself out of the loop. I just keep watching the same visions over and over.”

“Perhaps you are meant to infer something from these premonitions that you have yet to. You say that whatever takes place inside of that barn is in the future?”

She stepped out of Cas’ grasp and toward the barn, “Yeah. C’mon, you need to see this.”

Cas followed Evie into the rundown barn. As they crept inside, they situated themselves behind a stack of empty pallets where they would be able to see everything. 

The barn was empty, only strands of hay blowing around on the floor. Cas looked around confused, “This place is empty, Evelyn. I don’t-”

“Shhh, look.” She shushed the angel with a finger to her mouth and pointed to the door at the opposite end of the barn.

Castiel watched as the door opened and a version of Evie was flung through it and onto the floor by a thin, dark-haired man. The man stalked around the woman on the floor, looking smug, before kicking her in the stomach once.

“I told you this is always how it would end, little witch.” He grabbed her by the throat and lifted her off the floor, “Thought you could hide from me by buddying up with the Winchester’s? You were sorely mistaken.” The future version of Evie was thrown across the room and pinned to the wall by the demon.

“Sorath, you don’t have to do this. Once Lucifer’s topside, he’ll kill you. You’re a threat, and a demon. He hates you even more than he hates us.” She smirked. 

The demon punched her in the face once, twice, three times before grabbing her chin to look her in the eyes, “We’ll see what the King has to say once you set him free.” He reached behind him and grabbed a knife from his waistband, “Personally, I hope he kills you. You’ve been a giant pain in my ass since I found you. Now, I’m going to get this blood from you and then you’ll perform the spell to release him. Sound good?”

“Go to hell.” Future Evie growled through her teeth.

“If only my dear, if only.” Sorath looked longingly away for a second before taking the knife and dragging it down Evie’s exposed wrist. She tried to hold in the scream but it slipped past her lips, causing the demon’s to curl into a wicked smile. 

In their hiding place, Cas and Evie cringed. The angel turned to the women next to him, “How much longer does this last?”

Evie looked at Cas with tears in her eyes, “Not long.”

They returned their attention to the scene in front of them. After cutting a long gash in the future Evie’s wrist, Sorath held a bowl beneath it to catch the blood that spilled out. After he determined he had enough, he walked away toward what looked to be an altar of some sort, waving a hand behind him to release Evie from the wall. 

She dropped to the floor and held her wrist. If the bleeding didn’t stop soon she’d be too unconscious to even try to do anything Sorath wanted. “I don’t even know how to release him. The last time was the apocalypse. Seals had to be broken and Sam had to break the last one.”

 “Ah yes but you my dear, you are one of the only things aside from angels that have a type of magic touched by God himself. I have faith in you.” 

He stalked back over to Evie, bending to hoist her from the ground when her leg swung around and knocked the demon onto his back. She scrambled to her feet and made a break for the door. Sorath, however, was faster and grabbed her before she made it, pinning her to the wall by her neck.

“You are trying my patience, witch. Now, do as I say, or I will kill you.” He growled through his teeth.

“Go ahead. I’ll never release him for you. Lucifer is right where he belongs,” she rasped out through her constricted vocal cords.

“Suit yourself.” Sorath used the knife he had sliced Evie’s wrist with to stab her in the stomach. “I have your blood, I should be able to get another witch to do the rest. It gives me great pleasure, however, to be the one to permanently end the White Witch line, something I thought I did years ago when I killed your whore mother. Oh well, better late than never.” 

He ripped the knife from her abdomen and dropped her to the floor before disappearing from the barn. Cas and Evie watched as her breathing became labored, blood pooling around her. The image then began to flicker, almost like that of a ghost, before disappearing.

Castiel turned to Evie, “That is what you saw?”

She wiped the tears in her eyes, “Yep. That’s the third time I’ve seen myself die? Isn’t any easier,” she paused, “How do we get out Cas? I know I need to stop Sorath and I know that the way to do it is somewhere in the White Witch grimoires back in the bunker. What I don’t get is why I’m seeing this. If this is the outcome, what’s the point? Am I supposed to figure this all out just to die and let the boys handle it?”

“I believe you are seeing this because it is the result of the current path you’re on. Time is fickle; the future is constantly changing with every choice made. Dean and Sam have changed the future several times, I believe you are being shown this because you are meant to change it.”

“But how am I even being shown all of this? I’m not psychic I don’t get premonitions.”

“Your powers are evolving. The amount of power inside you is greater than any one White Witch has ever possessed, it is only natural that new abilities would follow.” He looked at her with a smile and reached out his hand, “Are you ready to go back?”

“Hell yes.” She grabbed it and returned the smile. Castiel closed his eyes and Evie followed suit. 

With a gasp, both Castiel and Evie opened their eyes back in the real world, the bunker and Winchester brothers in front of them. Sam had apparently been pacing behind Dean who sat in a chair in front of Evie, as he scrambled to her side as soon as she regained consciousness. 

“Hey, hey. Are you alright?”

She looked into her boyfriends hazel eyes and immediately smiled; “I have a headache straight from Hell, but yes. How long was I out?”

“Few hours. What the hell happened?” Dean stood and walked over to check on Cas.

“Could you not shout Dean? My head is killing me.”

“He didn’t, Evie. Are you sure you’re alright?”

Cas and Dean both walked over with looks of concern, Cas’ a little greater knowing what had gone on behind the scenes.

She looked down and rubbed her temples, “Yeah I just feel like I have a migraine mixed with a hangover. Maybe I should lie down. Cas can you fill them in?” She looked up at the boys and they all looked back with wide eyes. 

“What?” she asked puzzled.

“Uh, Evie.” Dean wiped under his nose discreetly. 

Evie mimicked the action and when she pulled her hand away, blood stained the sleeve of her shirt. She looked at her own wrist in surprise before touching under her nose with her fingertips; there was blood trickling from the left side of her nose.

She sighed, “Well, that’s not good.”

Read Chapter 18 Here

Tag List:

@lovesamwinchester @belfbastettia @winchesterxtwo @octo-cow52

[vizhi0n]

Sawney - Part 3

Part 1 Part 2

So uh idk what to even say. 

Anyway, enjoy this lovely chapter! If you want to be untagged lemme kno, and if u want to be tagged lemme know as well. I gotchu ;) I haven’t written third person in forever, so I’m sorry if some of my grammar, etc is a bit rusty. It’ll improve once my brain remembers how to write lol.

Homies:

@i-am-negan-trash @lucifers-trash-stash @jasoncrouse @kellyn1604 @crzcorgi @superprincesspea @negans-network @ladylorelitanyfanfiction @genevievedarcygranger @kijilinn @backseat-negan @heartfulloffandoms @hannibalssweaters @strangersangel9 @mypapawinchester @manawhaat @gremlinfuck @embracetheapocalypsewithme @rickydillon @flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash @wolfhart18 @mcnegan @melodicdolls @darkangel66a

Warnings: not as much this chapter except for referenced/implied rape and torture. Will get worse as the story progresses.

Desa rarely saw Mother and Father smile. The couple usually had a permanent grimace plastered across their faces. This was the first time, despite the circumstances, that Desa saw them both with a relatively satisfied, almost giddy look on their faces.

That was good. It meant that Desa had done her job. She’d worked hard.

She greeted Father first, as it was customary, closing her eyes and keeping still as he gingerly kissed her on the forehead. She nodded, and Mother was next, repeating the gesture.

“We strung him up in one of the storage closets, like you asked.”

Father made a noise in the back of his throat. Glancing between his wife and Desa, he replied, “I’ll see to him. Desa, he was your catch — you’ll receive the honor of helping me with him.”

“I…I saw his compound. His people. It’s huge and he has the firepower. More than we have. The people he brought with him today? That’s only a fraction.”

“You got inside?”

“I did,” Desa said, wincing as a foul odor flooded the dripping tunnels. She prayed that Mason would radio in that it was safe to ascend. “They’re functioning. And they’re dangerous.”

“I’m not worried about that.” 

“Are…are you going to try and make a deal?” Desa asked hesitantly. She was crossing a line, she knew. It was a miracle that Father was even giving her the time of day.

“Go to the storage room and wait.”

Of course he won’t answer.

“Yes, Father. May I check on Jack, first?”

“Yes. But do it quickly”

Desa hurried away, sweat beading on her brow. The sloshed further down the tunnel, finally reaching a dry patch of concrete. Ahead of her she could see chairs and tables, flickering lamps adorning their surfaces. She spotted Jack — he was in a circle with some other children.

“Jack?” 

That cherub face stared back at Desa, and she couldn’t help but let out a sigh. She embraced her younger brother, squeezing his shoulder until he giggled and squirmed from her grip.

“I’m fine. You don’t have to hold me so tight.”

“Sorry, buddy.”

“Is that man still here? That guy you brought in from the other place?” Jack asked curiously. “What’s he like?”

“He’s in holding. I don’t think we’re going to really do anything with him until Mason gives us the signal,” Desa replied softly. “I have to go over there now, alright? Father needs me to help him.” 

“Help him with what? Father never needs help.”

“I caught that guy, so Father thinks it’s fair that I…do whatever it is he wants me to do,” Desa couldn’t help but wince. She had a bubbling, uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. She wasn’t at all enthusiastic to participate in Fathers activities, but she knew the consequences if she said no. They weren’t worth it.

“I hope we can leave soon. This place smells.”

“It used to be where everyone’s poop would go. And piss,” The group of kids, including Jack, made a collective, exaggerated noise of disgust. Desa chuckled, adding, “So, yeah. Don’t go wandering around in it.” 

She hugged Jack again. Told him to stay out of trouble — which, she knew, he wouldn’t — and headed to the storage area. The room was wide and, before, had been used to store maintenance supplies. Now it had been cleared out and acted as a makeshift playpen for Father.

“Playpen” is a pretty loose term…

Negan had been strung up against the wall, arms stretched, wrist bound by rope. He was conscious, not speaking or cursing. Just glaring. The mocking, almost silly visage had disappeared.

Desa was alone with him. Father had yet to arrive. All she could do was stare, unsure of what to say.

If I run and grab Jack, I can get a head start. They won’t catch me.

Yeah. But you’ll be homeless. No food. Jack is naive — he can’t fight. He hasn’t even killed a biter yet.

She approached Negan hesitantly, going slow and methodical, unnerved by how his eyes seemed to follow her like a hawk. After what seemed like a thousand years, he spoke.

“Am I the only fucking one here? Do you have Simon and Dwight, too?”

“N-no,” Desa stammered. “You’re the only one. I don’t know what happened to everyone else—”

“Good. Now what the fuck are you going to do to me?”

“Introduce you to Father,” Desa said. “Maybe…maybe talk things out.”

“There’s nothing we have that you would fucking want. You said it yourself. I mean, hell, I’m willing to sit the fuck down and sketch out some deal but from what you told me,” Negan eased forward, ginning. “That ain’t going to fucking happen.” 

It’s not.

“It can if you cooperate.”

“I don’t really have a fucking choice, do I?”

Desa heard the heavy door swing open. Father’s footsteps echoed around the room and he stopped, close, so close to Desa that she could partly feel his breath against the side of her neck.

Desa dipped her head and stepped to the side. She kept it lowered while Father spoke, unwilling to make eye contact with Negan.

“You are…handsome,” Father clicked his tongue. “Sturdy. A bit aged but…overall, a satisfactory catch.”

“Am I supposed to be fucking flattered? Because I am,” Negan whistled. “Hey, Desa, did you string me up just to compliment me?”

Desa didn’t reply. Instead Father answered, “That’s only the first part. Next is the difficult section — the transfiguration of the mind and, if you’re willing, the body. And you will be willing. Desa, cut open his shirt.”

She obeyed. With shaking fingers she gripped her knife, stepping forward as Negan stared down at her.

Three deep breaths.

One.

Two.

Three.

She cut away at the thin material. An abdomen peppered with hair and weathered tattoos stared back at her. She was so, so glad she couldn’t see Negan’s eyes. The cloth fell to the floor in tatters, leaving Negan’s torso bare.

“Good,” Father murmured. He thought for a few moments, before gesturing for the knife. Very slowly Desa handed it to him. He looked it over before sheathing it, stepping closer to Negan. They were the same height, same build…same age, probably, though Father was never one to admit his age or talk about himself.

While they certainly weren’t carbon copies, they were similar. Almost too similar, and it was bothering Father. Each twitch, each quirk of Father’s lips communicated that to Desa loudly and clearly.

“I can smell the sweat on you. The blood. You kill often?”

Negan tilted his chin, trying to make himself seem taller. He growled, “Fuck yeah, I do.”

“I want to taste it.”

Desa was forced to watch as Father licked a stripe from Negan’s navel to his collarbone. At the touch of Father’s tongue to his clammy skin Negan lurched back, perturbed.

When Father pulled away, flecks of crimson adorned his lips. Desa clenched her fist to stop her hands from shaking, hearing Father murmur to himself before addressing Desa directly.

“Go grab the tools. The torch and the pliers, please.”

Desa didn’t move. Father raised his eyebrows, the sneer on his face enough to snap Desa out of her trance. She shuffled towards the cabinets, legs seemingly moving on their own accord. Negan was watching her yet again — she could feel his caustic gaze on her. She yanked open the drawer, retrieving the requested items.

She handed them to Father. Kept her head down.

I need to leave. I can’t watch.

“Father?”

“Yes?”

Desa gulped. She felt woozy, light headed. The sharp burst of blue fire from the blowtorch seemed brighter than it probably was.

It’s just your mind playing tricks. You’ve seen this before. You’ve seen—

“Jack. He…he needs me. He’s scared.”

“Are you asking to leave?”

“I can check on Jack and then go help Mason. He’s out there by himself. I’m sure you don’t need me for this,” Desa croaked. “I—”

“If you want to work, this is work. Get out if you can’t handle it.”

Desa’s eyes lingered on Negan an extra moment. He didn’t look angry — in fact, she could see a hint of something else in his dark eyes. Even when strung up and stripped practically naked, he was attempting to appear prideful.

Don’t pity me, Negan, pity yourself.

Desa spun on her heels and left, bile rising in her throat as she heard the sound of the blowtorch once more. The moment the iron door closed behind her she stumbled, emptying her stomach onto the slick sewer floor. Salty tears dripped from her eyes, past her quivering lips.

A muffled, deep scream filtered from beneath the door.

Desa stood up straight. Nobody could see her crying. That type of behavior was frowned upon, especially by Mother and Father.

She wiped her hands on her jeans, making her way down the sewer tunnels. Negan’s screams were distant, no longer bouncing off the walls like some sort of sick staccato. Not hearing it allowed her to push it away, to ignore it.

Father always did this. Negan wasn’t any different — he’d come out stronger. Better. Desa had to believe that. The man was intimidating, worth something. He wouldn’t end up in the cellar with the others.

Jack was no longer with his friends. Instead, he was with Mother, standing next to the woman’s chair. The nauseous feeling returned the moment Desa saw Mother’s hand stroking Jack’s hair, rhythmically and slowly.

Desa spoke first. “Father is still with…him.”

“I know. It won’t be very long until we can leave this disgusting place,” Mother wrinkled her nose. “You have vomit on your clothes. Does the stench affect you that badly?”

“Yes,” Desa said quickly, glancing down at her jacket. “It does. I don’t like it here either.”

“Mason better hurry, then,” Mother stopped stroking Jack’s hair. She smiled, murmuring to herself and shaking her head. Then she stood, hiking up her dress so not to get it dirty. “When we return to the Estate, you will join Father and I in the bedroom. A reward for your hard work today.”

Oh, no.

“I don’t need a reward. I do this because I care about you and Father and everyone else,” Desa said slowly, aware that Jack was watching with wide eyes. “I don’t need a reward.”

“If you care about us, you will satisfy us. Both of us. When we return you will join us.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Good. And you, Jack,” Mother turned, giving a genuine smile. “It’s your birthday soon, isn’t it?”

“Yes ma’am,” Jack replied with just a bit more enthusiasm.

“I have plenty of candy for the occasion. All of it yours.”

“Thank you, Mother.”

“I always look after my children.”

She left, headed towards the storage area. Desa listened hard, but found she could no longer hear Negan. Perhaps he’d died. Perhaps Father had gotten bored and simply killed Negan. Desa didn’t want to think about it, so she didn’t.

So she sat down, arm wrapped around Jack’s shoulder, and sang.

“City's breaking down on a camel's back, they just have to go ‘cause they don't know whack…”

[megacircuit9universe]

Alien Tip Off

WED SEP 16 2020

Woodward’s tapes of Trump, extensively admitting how well he understood the dangers of SarsCoV2, way back in the spring... that it was airborne, that it was far more deadly than the flu, etc... have stayed in the news all week, with longer and longer clips being released that utterly destroy any possible, devil’s advocate, arguments in Trump’s favor on this... the single most important issue facing the nation.

It’s safe to say we’re all stunned!

He was simultaneously smart enough to grasp the true danger of the virus... yet stupid enough to... agree to go off about this on tape with Woodward and... still do what he did in his response to the threat.

The tapes don’t JUST justify his impeachment, and expose every Senator who voted to acquit, as dastardly cowards... but they gut any possible, devil’s advocate, arguments for Trump, by anybody with any grip on sanity.

This puts the current GOP Senate in great peril... even as it reduces the base of loyal Trumpist voters they were banking on... to only the criminally insane.

No more fluffy padding of evangelicals, and other right wing conservatives who, held their nose, so does speak, and went along for the sake of the party. They’ve now formed a very visible, and powerful movement to deny Trump, and any of his hardcore Senate loyalists... another term. 

And they’re doing it for the same reason they originally held their noses and went along... to save their party from the brink of irrelevance in a world where the blast doors of history are closing on old school conservatism.*

Which brings us to TikTok...

The deadline for the TikTok ban, as outlined by a sketchy executive order by Trump a while back, draws near.  

And while American companies like Microsoft and WalMart scrambled to get a deal done in time, China also chimed in last week and said... Yeah, no... if ByteDance sells it’s American operations... the new owners can’t have the algorithm without our say so... and... we’d rather see TikTok die in America than bow to Trump’s silly demands so... haha, just saying! :D

Meanwhile, TikTok has been challenging the original executive order in court, and everybody is now saying even if the deadline passes, Trump can’t just shut down an app like that... and he’d have to get both Android and Apple to agree to disable it in their app stores... which would lead to more litigation and... well, it could take many more months than Trump has left in power, to sort out.

Unless he gets reelected... or successfully remains in power despite being voted out.

Which brings us to the aliens!..

Monday night (September 14th) TikTok was suddenly flooded with videos of UFO sightings over the United States... concentrated in, but not limited to New Jersey, Colorado, and Nevada.  

The earliest and most viral of these was being debunked immediately as the GoodYear Blimp, but... the people at Goodyear Blimp have since said, no... that was not our blimp.

The videos depict a lot of different types of UFOs... they don’t all look the same.  Some were singular glowing orbs, or true flying saucer looking crafts, while other videos showed groups of strange lights acting in concert.

The common denominator for all of them, however, was... all are pretty lengthy and clear... corroborated by multiple TikTokers in any given area... and all have so far defied any rational explanation.

Blimps, drones, skydivers with flares, swamp gas, you name it... none of the off the cuff discredits have yet proven out... much less any explanation for why so many sightings happened simultaneously across the continent.

Of course, lots of alien lovers have been quick to tell us this is some message of peace or whatever... but when something like this happens, I can only go to my own model, as established here in this blog.

And I can draw no other conclusion than this... the Aliens were behind it, and they were deliberately using TikTok to spook Trump... and the other powerful men in his Junta (Barr, McConnell, etc).

Recall that earlier this year I speculated that Kim Jong Un was not only dead, but that it was likely the Aliens who killed him, because he was too likely to start a nuclear war.

North Korea has yet to admit that Jong Un is dead... but the rest of the world assumes, these many months later, that he must be.  He’s not re-emerged, and the few video reels of him released this year... barely even try to be convincing.

The media hasn’t talked much about this, because so much other shit’s been going on this year... but no... I’m not backing off my conclusion that he’s dead, because nothing’s come along to even slightly prove me wrong on that, much less embarrass me about that conclusion.

He’s dead.  

The aliens killed him.

And now those same aliens are using TikTok to spook Trump.

This implies that Aliens are a lot more familiar with the intimate details of our daily life than we normally think... knowing not only that we all have smart phones with cameras, but that we also have a hugely popular app that would ensure any sightings would go viral immediately... and that this is the same app Trump is trying to shut down.

What’s the message for Trump?

Well, first... a bit more context...

This past week, the other huge story in the news has been the west coast wild fires.  We’ve seen out of control wildfires on the Pacific coast in late summer for the past four years, as we did in Australia in their late summer, this past January... but this year’s fires in America have been record breaking in terms of their devastation.

The aliens... who’ve been monitoring this planet periodically since humans first learned of fire... paying closer attention after we developed electricity... and who have been permanently stationed in the solar system since we figured out fission bombs at the end of WW2... have had, as their main objective, to stand down, and observe us... unless the planet is in danger of a cascading failure due to either a nuclear or climate catastrophe... or both.  

In such cases, they are willing to intervene... for the sake of preserving the level of intelligence, and diversity of life that’s evolved here... because it takes so goddam long for this kind of intelligence, and this kind of diversity to evolve in the first place.  

Still, they’d always rather just hang back and observe.  

So... since World War Two... they’ve tolerated all kinds of nuclear bomb testing, and everything else, without feeling the need to do much more than hint, to world leaders, that humanity may not be alone in the universe.

Until very recently, when they pinpointed two individuals who were a direct threat to the planet... Kim Jong Un, and Donald Trump.  

Jong Un had no real impact on the climate, but he did pose a nuclear threat, dangerous enough, they had to intervene and just off him.

Trump poses both a nuclear threat, and a climate threat, so... Jong Un’s death was a first warning sign, and this latest stunt on TikTok, at the peak of the wildfires, is yet another.

Don’t think you’re commanding the most powerful military force in the universe, because you’re not.  We’re real, and you can’t touch us.  We know what you’re doing.  We know what you fear (TikTok), and we WILL take you out, Space Force or no Space Force... buddy!

Assuming I’m right about this... which I think you at least have to grant is possible this late in the game, given all that’s happened... it’s an unprecidented show of force, from an intergalactic army so shy of confrontation, we barely have any evidence they exist.

That tells you what a dire juncture we are at, right now, on this timeline**.

But the fact that the aliens would use TikTok to make this statement... does seem to suggest that they do have AI bot agents, on our internet, who are in communication with our own advanced AI bots from the future, left behind by our time travelers... and that they are all in cahoots to save the timeline.

Recall that while Alien propulsion tech is likely based in the manupulation of microsingularities, or mini-black holes, to frame-drag spacetime around the ship... for Aliens it’s more about space travel, than time travel.

Time travel doesn’t really mean anything on intergalactic scales.  It only has meaning for primitive humans hanging very close to Earth, moving back and forth through the span of a few decades locally, to grab objects, get footage, and leave bot agents behind to promote human rights.

The aliens hanging out in our solar system are more or less just as pinned to our timeline as we are... or the bots those time travelers leave behind.

And if you don’t get that by now, I would suggest reading back in earlier entries, but maybe I’ll do another one as a refresher soon.

It was encouraging to see a TikToker on my For You Page this past week actually mention John Titor, and go into a little depth about him, but as usual, nobody could follow it.***

But more encouraging was this display by the aliens, that gave the first confirmation I’ve seen, that they do know and care what’s going on down here, in times as dire as we’re currently living through.

And with that roundup of a week’s news... it is time for bed.

*With GenX turning 50, Millenials turning 30, and GenZ turning 20, the tide is turning forever away from old school conservatism, with all of it’s racism, sexism, and classism. November 2020 could be the first time, all three of these generations turn out to the polls in force (millenials were too apathetic before this, and Z was too young to vote) to drown out the fading influence of the Boomers and Silents, once and for all.

My guess, as I’ve said, is that the current anti-Trump conservatives will all move to the Democratic Party, leaving the Republican Party to die as a haven for neo nazis and KKK sympathizers... while the progressive left will form a new party to counter the comparatively conservative new democrats, who at least acknowledge climate change, and don’t pin everything else on the single issue of abortion.

**Worth noting that this passed week news also broke that scientists had detected a marker for microbial life in the atmosphere of Venus.  It appears to be the strongest evidence yet that life is not exclusive to Earth.

***Not to suggest I’m so much more clever than ordinary people.  It took me upwards of fifteen years of studying physics through videos, lectures, and audio books to get the full picture of how Titor’s distortion unit worked, and how the many worlds theory resolves the kinds of paradoxes most people imagine would happen. 

[claroquequiza]

*takes deep breath and then a sip of water*

*bangs fists on table to hype myself up*

you know, i really love afterdrop and it’s one of my fave fics on ao3 and the issues i have with hanzo-genji reconciliation don’t necessarily ascribe to it but i really need to discuss my thought i have with the bros in depth

i have two main points about it

1) people tend to assume that genji is completely blameless and innocent in this scenario……like he was going about his business, bothering no one and one day, out of the blue, hanzo comes out of the left field and murders him. that can’t be it. it’s very headcanon-y but he must have known something was up. like he was part of the yakuza (even if he wasn’t participating in it)……what did he think the yakuza *did*????? [genji, part of a gang of criminals murdering people: i never thought that criminals would murder *me*!] he can’t have been completely clueless about that situation and yet he did………nothing in terms of conflict resolution????? what???? like he severely underestimated the clan and the seriousness of the situation???

2) people tend to dismiss and invalidate hanzo’s feelings of the matter. even genji and zenyatta partake in that behavior. i’m not saying that hanzo was justified in doing that but……….what it took genji to enlightment was acceptance of his situation and yet he tells hanzo that what he’s feeling is…..wrong???? that he should get over himself and that’s……….the complete opposite what *he* did. hypocritical much????

addendum) it’s genji’s line of “i have accepted what i am and i have forgiven you” what takes me to this conclusion but it seems to me genji hasn’t *really* forgiven hanzo. he’s come to terms with his trauma and so the crime committed against him doesn’t seems that great anymore and that’s what took him to such conclusion and not that he understood why hanzo did what he did. that he really doesn’t want his brother back, he wants the illusion of hanzo from before…….buddy, that hanzo is dead. he may have never even existed. you’re trying to reconnect with a ghost and that’s not gonna work.

thank you for you time.

Everything before now is @whyllastorch’s, everything following is mine.

Thank you very much for the submission, and thank you for the compliments, I appreciate them very much! 

Afterdrop will be delving into these very subjects! But let me address them here just a little bit!

1) I agree that Genji was by no means innocent or completely blameless. I don’t like Young Genji very much at all, in point of fact--he strikes me as a fratboy on the lower end of the spectrum of likeability. I’m not too impressed with YG in most of fandom, either, even when people sidestep the whole yakuza thing in AUs--he’s usually one of those annoying party boys who expects his family to bail him out of any consequences, and he tends to torment Hanzo and revel in his discomfort, making jokes at his expense and pushing him way, way out of his comfort zone. It’s usually excused as being for Hanzo’s benefit or to take him down a few pegs, but it often comes off as more for Genji’s entertainment than anything else.

And when you don’t ignore the whole yakuza thing, all of it, the partying and the bailouts, is financed with blood with his full knowledge if not at least partial complicity, given his training. So Genji is not a good person, or at least not a moral one. People tend to excuse him with the “boys will be boys” attitude, too, even though he was 25 when Hanzo confronted him.

Now, this isn’t to imply that Genji deserved what happened to him, or to excuse Hanzo at all. Hanzo was not only yakuza, he was the head of the yakuza, so everything the clan was doing was in his name. People tend to excuse him by blaming the elders for it all, but, again, Hanzo was an adult--he was 28 when he murdered Genji, and had been “in charge” when he did it. 

I’m relying on this post here when it comes to “assigning blame”. Genji was failing in his familial duty and knew it full well, but relied on passing off the responsibility to his family while taking advantage of their status for his own selfish desires. Hanzo was fulfilling his familial duty, but was executing a man whose “crime” was partying instead of assassinating. In the end, I think Hanzo is still by far the guiltier party, but Genji is not entirely blameless, and I don’t think he was stupid and clueless about the situation, either.

2) Hanzo’s feelings about Genji and the duel are a tricky thing, because the fact that he was 28 when he murdered Genji both absolves and condemns him. He was a fully grown adult in full possession of his faculties, he’s a smart man, and he was the head of the clan. He really should have been able to figure out something other than killing his brother, but he did it anyway. 

However, most of us in the English-speaking fandom are judging him by Western standards, and Western standards not only assign far more individualistic responsibility, but also tend to assume far more simplistic power structures. Just because he was the head of the clan doesn’t mean he was in charge--Japanese history and culture especially illustrates this with the Shoguns, who ruled Japan for a full seven centuries even though the Emperor was the “leader”. The Emperor was, in fact, given a carefully controlled ceremonial role as he was shuffled back and forth in the machinations of the shoguns, and this seems to be the role that Blizzard intended Hanzo to be in, more or less.

So what were Hanzo’s feelings in all this? I don’t know if even Hanzo himself would be in a position to know. He was probably carefully prepared for a role that could very well have been ceremonial rather than authoritative. I think Shimada Sojiro (or Hanzo and Genji’s mother in the case of Afterdrop) is meant to have been a particularly skillful and charismatic head of the clan who was able to seize more power from the elders than was usual OR he was old enough to be the head of the clan in both position and seniority. I tend to think the latter is more likely in Overwatch canon (but that’s not how it’s going to go down in Afterdrop). Whatever the case, he apparently did not or could not pass that same level of authority to Hanzo. 

So what were Hanzo’s feelings? I don’t think they mattered. To anyone. So I’m not sure if Genji and Zenyatta are invalidating Hanzo’s feelings as much as they’re trying to goad Hanzo into considering his own feelings and motivations rather than the teachings/machinations/slander of the clan. He was under their thumb for 28 years, almost three-quarters of his life, so it wouldn’t surprise me that he’s still at least partially their mouthpiece even after a decade. After all, as previously discussed, it wasn’t as though Genji was innocent, so it’s not a cut-and-dried thing for him to absolve himself or Genji, even after ten years.

Addendum) Genji’s intentions with forgiving Hanzo are not very clear to me. For one thing, it’s only implied, slightly implied that he’s seeking reconciliation at all, with Hanzo as he was or is now. Reconciliation is a theme of the Tale of the Dragon Brothers, not necessarily of Hanzo and Genji’s confrontation in Dragons. The only hint that reconciliation might be a goal initially comes from Hanzo, when he assumes that Genji is referencing the Tale. Genji only soft confirms it. From everything else in Dragons and their in-game dialogue, it seems to me like reconciliation isn’t something that Genji expects from the glib way he interacts with Hanzo. Or Hanzo either, for that matter, since he seems mostly cynical when he’s not outright accusatory. So to assume that reconciliation is a main goal of Genji’s is more an invention of fandom than of canon, I think.

So what are his main goals? I think he may have been showcasing a bit, because as you say, he mentions his self-acceptance, but accepting himself doesn’t mean he has to display himself the way he did, so I think there’s something to your thought that he hasn’t really forgiven Hanzo--he clearly wants to demonstrate something, but I’m not sure I know what it is from what little we have. 

But that’s what fanfiction (and Afterdrop) is for.

Thanks so much for your submission! You raised a lot of good points!