my grandma sent me a picture of my dog with his new xmas present and i need a fucking inhaler LOOK AT HIM
oh to feel a fraction of the unbridled joy he is experiencing
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I need my sweet boy on top of me, humping my thigh with his head buried in my neck so i can play with his hair and whisper to him how pretty he is right then
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Carver Hawke "Knight of swords" tarot card for an old Dragon Age zine
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oh, kevin day. i’m sorry they don’t think your trauma was enough because it wasn’t always physical. i’m sorry they mistake your latching onto exy as anything other than a means to keep surviving, and now you can’t unlearn it. i’m sorry you never learned to love something without strings being attached. i’m sorry you have to blame yourself for things that were out of your control. i’m sorry they see your ability to talk to the press as anything other than trained — as necessary — as cruel. i’m sorry you never got to have a father, even when you found him. i’m sorry your narrative has always been haunted by your mother
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no but really let’s talk about the dynamic between the older gen spideys vs young gen spideys for a moment, because it’s really got me fucked up.
miguel and all the older gen spideys seem so entirely accepting of all these “canon compliant” rules, because those rules absolutely validate the trauma that every one of them has gone through. the idea of “oh our pain had a reason, oh our heartbreak was for something after all” is a VERY powerful notion that—understandably—they welcome with open arms because they have already lived it.
but the younger gen spideys…. yes, most of them have bought into miguel’s logic for most of the movie, because of course you’re going to listen to the 1,000,000 adults all telling you the same thing when you’re fucking fifteen and desperate for any semblance of mentorship. and it sure does make a lot more sense when you yourself have also experienced a similar trauma to all the others.
but that’s exactly it, isn’t it? they’ve all experienced the same trauma—
that miles and pav have not.
so, no. actually, fuck your rules. and really, fuck your demands that i must suffer what you suffered just because you cannot accept me without it. and good on miles for saying it—good for all of the spideys who realized he was right—realized he was asking all the right questions instead of drawing all the wrong conclusions.
(yet. for all my anger i feel towards the older gen for pressuring him in that way….i also understand why they cling so desperately to these stupid “canon” rules. because, if miles can manage to resist it—if he or gwen or pav can escape what they never could—then suddenly, they have to ask the question of:
“what didn’t i do right?”
and
“was all that pain really for nothing?”
and accepting your life after having to ask those questions instantly becomes much more difficult.)
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