#but VM has my whole heart

[itachanta]

Me with most fics and books: I'm just gonna wait till it's completed to start reading it. If not, I'll probably forget to continue it / lose interest.

Me with Trigun Vashmeryl fics: STARTING EVERYTHING I DON'T CARE I WILL RE-READ THEM A MILLION KNIVES TIMES UNTIL THEY ARE COMPLETED *screeching*

[ilanarose7]

Some outcomes of Critical Role episode 91 (that happened either because of or completely separate from the big thing)

SPOILERS!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!

Starting with the ones not due to FCG's sacrifice:

Liliana has some level of trust and attempts at redemption with her daughter (those 31's on deception and persuasion Laura you legend!), which means a major player (and VESSEL?? tf was that about) who was formerly (and maybe kind of still) on Ludinus's side is swapping over

Ashton and Fearne are about to be exhausted from being Titans (Ashton much sooner since they powered up in ep. 90)

Zathuda is both proud and angry towards Fearne which is both terrifying and a bit heartwarming(?)

Nana (I think/hope it was her bending fate) was able to help Team Infiltration escape the Weavemind after Orym reached out

Now for the other outcomes due to FCG's sacrifice:

Orym's deal with Nana should be void since the group cannot return as they were (VM Spoiler Note: Liam's PC was finally saved from a deal leading to a life of service by Sam's PC after he wasn't able to in C1)

Chetney is ALIVE! I'm counting this as part of the sacrifice bc due to weird leveling circumstances Sam sacrificed his one brand-new 7th-level spell slot to take Revivify, which is a major thing to give up

Otohan is DEAD! GONE! That is a MAJOR player off the board and another one of Ludinus's high-ranking members off the board

FCG is dead, seemingly unrevivable based on how Matt phrased it (asking to make sure Sam understood what it meant). That will have MAJOR implications going forward.

On a D&D technical level, there is no primary healer meaning that Fearne has to take some healing spells or the party can't heal at all (pretty sure they used up all their potions during that fight).

On a character level, this is going to be devastating. Ashton, who started this whole adventure with FCG and has been saying for a LONG time that FCG was going to get themself killed, was unconscious when FCG made the ultimate sacrifice. Sending works, which means when they get back to Exandria, Imogen will probably be the one to let FRIDA know what happened.

On a slightly lighter note, I feel like Travis is going to shine next week. It's been said before and I'll say it again, Chetney is the heart of Bells Hells. He knows how to be there for this family and I have a feeling that will come to the forefront as we see the aftermath

I'm sure there are more outcomes, but these are the ones on my mind after barely sleeping last night following that episode. Sam knows how to play this game well and cuts straight to the heart while doing so. It was masterfully played and while completely devastating to watch, was also incredibly heroic and beautiful.

Good game, great players, amazing DM, and of course thank you Fresh Cut Grass for being a Faithful Care-Giver until the end

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

How am I just finding out about the VM band AU!!?

Okay I have a list I have a list of Taylor Swift songs that ARE some of the VM coded.

No one can convince me that look what you made me do isn't Percy. Like the lyrics ARE the story of his life. Like 'I made a list of names and yours are in red underlined' 👀 and 'you asked me for a place to sleep, threw me out then threw a feast'?! Like that IS his story with the Briarwoods

The Archer is obviously Vex not just cause she's a ranger but the whole song is about the anxiety of not knowing who you are and who will stay with you, which is very much like our girl here.

Vax is bigger then the whole sky and once I heard it I can't unhear it and I cry everytime. You have the grasp of something that could've been amazing and wonderful but slipped through your fingers before it was able to start. 😭

Keyleth I believe with my whole heart is who's afraid of little old me. Everyone always is underestimating our girl but she has power, she has strength and she has anger in her. This is song is just giving her angery faze.🤌🏻

Scanlan I believe is mirrorball, because he sometimes feels like he is just the pretty shinny funny dude shinning for everyone else and no one steps back and actually gets to know him. IE "what's my mother's name"...

Pike I think is long story short. It's a more upbeat song but actually hold a super deep message and shows that yes things happen bad things and you will often make mistakes but in the end you made it through.

Grog is the best day. We all know Grog love his friends so much and would drop anything to be there for them and the best day I think can illustrate the way him and Pike grew up together when they only had eachother hut also the loyalty he has for his friends.

In conclusion a song that is just Vox Machina as a whole is Long Live. I literally can't listen to this song without thinking of them anymore. All the pieces of it shows their love for eachother and the feeling that they can face anything together (even dragons 😆). I feel like this song would be one they drop during their random drops after they stopped regularly touring and dropping albums as a tribute to the times they had together and a thank you to their fans.

I have a lot of feeling about these obviously and I'm glad to find an appropriate place to share them 😊

y'all, I don't know any of these songs lmaooo. BUT I absolutely love these ideas so much!!!

[critter-rarepair-reccs]

Hello all! Hope your Wednesday is going well. Today we have nine Pre-Relationship fics for you to enjoy! As always, you can find them below the cut and if you check any of them out, I encourage you to leave kudoes and comments to spread the rarepair love 🩷

gravity-bound by hanap (7,591 words, Teen) Pairing: Jester Lavorre/Essek Thelyss (Jessek) Warnings: None

Essek writes poetry under a pen name, Jester is a fan, she writes to him and they start to exchange letters over many years.

Reccer Says: I love epistolary fic, and also its so cute. There's a lot of background details of canon events we can fill in the background through the letters contents, which is very fun.

in the pieces of what's left or what we've found by SeaWitchDreams (14,620 words, Teen) Pairing: Astrid Beck/Eadwulf Grieve/Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast (Blumenshadow) Warnings: None

Post canon, Astrid decides what to do with Ikithon's tower, and her life.

Reccer Says: Its a nice long read, and the character beats are complex and nuanced, bc that's what Astrid deserves <3

That Lucidian Glow by fjorests_of_wildemount (455 words, General) Pairing: Kingsley Tealeaf/Essek Thelyss (Shadowking) Warnings: None

Essek needs to put on sunscreen, Kingsley volunteers.

Reccer Says: It's fun and cute moment <3

to be in someone else's coat by jaskofalltrades (1,369 words, General) Pairing: Mollymauk Tealeaf/Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast (Shadowidomauk) Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

After Essek's dinner with the Nein at the Xhorhaus, Molly and Caleb walk him home. Flirting, of course, ensues.

Reccer Says: It's so fun to see how Essek responds to Molly's relentless flirting, filtering through Caleb's observations on how new Essek is to friendship. And how he can tell that Essek wants that companionship so badly! It's very sweet.

though we're tethered to the story we must tell (when I saw you, well, I knew we'd tell it well). by exhaustedwerewolf (4,535 words, Teen) Pairing: Polymachina Warnings: Mentions of backstory typical violence and character death

On one wrist is your greatest love. On your other, your greatest adversary. And for a certain group of fated adventurers, one of these follows a pattern.

Reccer Says: I'm always a sucker for a good soulmate AU and I *love* ones of this flavor. The angst of not knowing which name is which is delicious and the way this fic plays with that for each member of VM is so good! Also love that the love-bonds don't Have to be romantic, I always appreciate that when it comes to soulmate AUs. And the way it all comes together in the end for VM is just... so good. Also the character voices in the narration? Spot on.

know no shame by hanap (4,453 words, Teen) Pairing: Adeen Tasithar/Essek Thelyss Warnings: None

What if Essek and Adeen had crushes on each other as teenagers and were adorable, messy disaster about it?

Reccer Says: It's so cute. Like oh-my-god so cute. They're adorable with each other and baby wizard Essek trying to join the Aurora Watch so he can spend more time with Adeen has my WHOLE heart. The messy teenage feelings! The circumstances keeping them apart! Deirta and Dad Thelyss's reactions to them!!! It's all so so good.

The Sunny Side by dracoqueen22 (1,767 words, General) Pairing: Jester Lavorre/Beauregard Lionett (Beaujes) Warnings: None

There’s nothing Beau won't do if it’ll make Jester smile, even if it means fixing something as minor as a sunburn.

Reccer Says: Cutteee <3 Beau is just so smitten. Plus Cad being his odd self in the first half <3

Today I Love You Even More by wtgw (5,687 words, Teen) Pairing: Yeza Brenatto/Veth Brenatto/Caleb Widogast Warnings: None

Yeza Brenatto is a creature of infinite anxiety, but he’s not blind. He can see how much Veth loves Caleb. He can see how much Caleb loves her back. And he can also see that Caleb is really attractive. But it’s not like he’s not going to do anything about that…

Reccer Says: Yeza Brenatto is just a perfect sweetheart always and there's this scene where the three of them are sitting around drunk complementing each other that is just too cute

Just Between Friends by biorusted (3,624 words, Explicit) Pairing: Ashton Greymoore/Orym/Dorian Storm (Dashrym) Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Aspec Dorian talks with Ashton and Orym about how sex has always felt to him and they share their feelings in return. Things escalate from there. Just as friends, of course.

Reccer Says: Aspec Dorian my beloved <3 always love the dynamics between these three, they fit together so well.

Thank you for joining us this week’s recc list! All the love to everyone who submitted a fic 🩷 All enclosed recommendations were submitted by the community via our submissions form, which you can find here. All fic information is as it was provided by the reccer, so it may not be accurate to the author’s intent or the precise contents of the fic itself. Please assume good intent from all parties 🩷

Submissions for next week’s list are already open! We’ll be featuring Canon Divergent fics. If you have any you’d like to highlight, you can send them in here. The week after that, the theme is Keyleth Rarepairs and the weeks after that we’re taking recommendations for Polyamorous Ships and Enemies to Lovers fic! Submissions for all of these themes are currently open.

If you want more rarepair fic, check out @cr-summer-wildflowers and their event collections on ao3! If you want some friendship after all this romance, take a look at @critter-genfic-events and their recc lists! And if you’re interested in everyone’s favorite wizards, you can’t go wrong with the lists at @aeor-is-for-reccing !

Thanks all and have a lovely day/night/timezone! 🩷

[hurrl]

* TEARS IN MY EYES * I HUMBLY REQUEST MY RAT, COLIN, FOR THAT OC BINGO 🤲🤲🥺 THANK YOU VM, AND NO PRESSURE OFC !! 🙏

GIRTH!!!! I don't think you're aware of just how much I love Colin 😳😳 I WAS THERE WHEN HE FIRST APPEARED ON THE SCENE IN HIS BELL EARING ERA that's been a few years so idk how much has changed, but Colin was the first ever fan art I did of someone's oc. Colin has my whole heart, but when he was working at the POST OFFICE?? I love him, I love him and his crowded teeth and his painted nails and his fuck ass cardigan ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😤😤😤😤

WE EVEN GOT BINGOOOO

I am the number one Colin defender. Like yeah he did that shit and he looked good while doing it. I DON'T CARE. Nothing could make me dislike Colin 🤞🤞🤞 if Colin has ZERO fans I must be dead 🤷‍♀️

I am kissing him on the MOUF 👏

Not just me all my ocs would love him too not a doubt in my mind. I could go into detail and I WILL, I WILL GO INTO DETAIL-

Reasons why My (Hurrl's) oc's would like Colin

Hugo- The social awkwardness Colin has would enchant him.

Kalani- She adores the way he dresses and I think she'd really love his smile.

Squirrel- Thinks he's a little weirdo but in a fun way!

Wolfgang- They both enjoy anime and I feel like they could fangirl over their faves together.

Lilith- He looks bite-able.

Chrysalis- He seems very easy to make fun of. She would bully him but in a fun and hot way, promise! (I need 10 more of these lil pink bitches)

[corvuscorona]

do u have any advice for switching to linux? im admittedly intimidated but so tired of windows ads.. and i've had to reinstall windows 3 times this year because updates have just. broke. so i'm done w all that.

takes your hand. the first step is getting so fed up with microsoft's bull shit that you start thinking to yourself "fuck, maybe I DO want to see what linux is about actually". and you are already there.

I typed a lot again but let me boil it down real quick so you know what you're getting into:

A "linux distribution" is an operating system, basically

Most of the common ones are easy to use now, tho ymmv with the Software You Need and what you use computers for

Start with a virtual machine; troubleshoot until delighted; install

Back your files up regularly so you can un-fuck-up if needed (<- general life advice, but very helpful here for peace of mind)

Windows : IKEA :: Linux : wood + hardware + tools. kinda.

here are 3 other things:

I'm not an expert I'm a very lost new user with a chainsaw and a can-do attitude

Experts don't generally keep the "new user" feeling close to their heart so what the fuck do they know about anything anyway

I don't know what you know so, like, bear with me.

...but also if you have more specific questions I'm around and hate my day job so feel extremely free to jump back into my inbox and be like "hey what the fuck is up with ___". or not. I typed so much.

anyway here's some stuff that would've helped me :3

ime, the most Intimidating thing about going from "god I hate the accursed Window" to "linux desktop user" is wrapping your head around what distros are. I overcame this hurdle by recklessly abusing duckduckgo and youtube, but you don't have to.

think of a "linux distribution" as an "operating system". there are one morbillion of them, but if you pick one out of the Big Fucking Pile you can download it, and it will be one (1) file that you can put on a USB drive, and then you can plug that USB drive into your Windows Machine and make the file install itself, and then the machine will have a new operating system. and if you don't like that one you can pick out a different one. off the pile. simple.

now that I have established this: you will have to Choose A Distribution. I have advice on this topic.

it is way easier to make the INSTALLING LINUX ON YOUR WHOLE COMPUTER jump if you use it in a virtual machine first. probably what this will teach you is that it mostly works like you expect a computer to work, but if you encounter any Problems, you can deal with them in your own time because your existing operating system is still right there. this tutorial will get you there. do not use ubuntu, though; use MX Linux. it is better. instead of "download an ubuntu image," go here and download one of these two mx linux images:

standard one (red) if your computer is old, or

"ahs" (blue) if your computer is not very old.

use your judgment. then proceed according to the tutorial, basically.

I am giving you direct instructions instead of general advice because linux is a vast landscape of choice paralysis, which is also one of the things that has tripped me up before. once you have Used Some Linux, you'll start to Learn which things you want to have be different, and once you have some Preferences you can start tailoring your whole situation. unlike the accursed Window, where you can think "I kind of hate windows explorer" and then spend all afternoon on reddit learning that other file explorers for windows TECHNICALLY EXIST but none of them do the stuff you want. anyway.

once you have a working VM of mx linux, here's some stuff to think about or do:

+ what's your impression of the desktop immediately after installing? click stuff and see if you hate anything or can't figure out how to do something simple you can just Do on windows. then go into the settings and see if you can change something you hate, or open firefox and look up how to do the thing you can't do. rinse repeat.

+ tbh maybe this is me being a little freak but I spent like hours collectively in the settings just messing around. there's a new thing in MX tools where you can change the colors of your folder icons to literally whatever color you want; click that. enjoy the unadulterated aesthetic power.

+ log into your mozilla account on firefox. if you don't have a mozilla account, make one and then log into it. if you're on chrome, import all your chrome shit into firefox and attach it to a mozilla account and then log into it on your regular OS and in the VM. now you can blog from linux.

+ (you can also install chrome if you want (I have it in case a website belligerently doesn't want to work on firefox + have had to use it for, like, bills or whatever once in a blue moon). or any other browser. set up your preferred stuff everywhere!! go download a desktop wallpaper!! download these images and put them on there. home sweet home.)

+ you will encounter inconveniences as you try to use the VM for your Everyday Computing Experience, mostly because all your shit is already set up and stored on your windows computer and you're gonna be like "fuck I need [file]" and it's kind of a pain in the ass to directly get files from a host onto a VM and cloud storage sucks and none of your stuff is where you expect it to be on the desktop etc etc etc. deal with this as it comes. idk, write stuff down. solve 1 problem at a time when you have spare time. your goal at this point should be "I can use the VM instead of my actual computer for everyday tasks". but you can get there slow.

+ if you run into something that you USE on windows and CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO USE OR REPLACE on linux, now you are asking the big questions. go down a research rabbithole about it.

here is where I start saying generalizations again:

linux will teach you to Find Solutions For Stuff. the difference btwn windows and desktop linux is that windows will be like "here's how it is. don't worry about it" and you can either go "okay <3 yay <3" or you can get pissed off and go see what linux is about. and linux will be like "well here's like the entire breadth of human UX proclivities and a lot of power tools; I'll be on the forums if you need me; good luck, champ" AND THAT'S AWESOME. p.s. keep the forums for your distro close at hand when troubleshooting. they do good work in there.

uh basically my advice is: step up to it. do not stop trying stuff. become a gun that's full of bullets that are questions, and eventually you WILL be A Linux User. also, write down any command line stuff you learn in like a notebook or whatever so you can remember it without looking it up again next time you need it.

here's one: "./filename.whatever" runs the file. this is useful for when you download something that's not in your distro's package manager and have to run it like it's an exe or something and there's just a .sh file in there and you don't know what that means. it means "right click the folder -> 'open terminal here' -> type './filename.sh' -> program is now running". here's another one: "~/" stands for your home folder. which is where all your stuff lives. on mx linux I can hit f4 to bring up the dropdown terminal, type "featherpad ~/Documents/linuxes\ advice.txt" and it'll open this document in the default text editor. the \ is an escape character so it knows you mean the space is part of the filename. now you're 1337 :)

finally: if and when you reach a point where you can do all your normal computer stuff on your virtual machine, back up ur files off your windows machine and do one of the following:

take a new image of your working copy of mx linux (mx tools can help you do this) and install that on The Real Machine

get a clean .iso of mx linux and install it and re-set it up from scratch. pg 17 of the user manual, "2.2.3 Create LiveMedium", will tell you how to set up the USB drive, btw.

pick a different distribution and install that.

if you are 100% happy with mx, fuck yeah keep it. if you want something shinier, may I suggest Garuda? I fucking love Garuda Linux with my life.

SECTION FOR IF YOU PLAY GAMES ON YOUR COMPUTER BECAUSE THERE'S A LOT TO SAY ABOUT THIS:

if you play games, during your "what do I do with this VM" phase, go get them + try to run them. if you play games via steam, the store page for a game will have a "system requirements" field for linux if the game runs natively on linux. it usually says "ubuntu" but that doesn't actually mean you have to be running ubuntu; try it anyway. if the game does not run natively on linux, you can go into the game's settings and go to compatibility and "force the use of a compatibility tool" and a lot of the time that will just work ("proton experimental" is fine, or whatever the newest one is). if you have trouble, go protondb you and see what people have said about running the game. IF A GAME HAS MULTIPLAYER MAYBE GO TO PROTONDB FIRST and check to see whether anyone says anything about anticheat; this is the only thing that can have actual permanent consequences (sometimes anticheats will trigger if you try to use workarounds that let you run a game on linux). you can also look up a specific game on the r/linux_gaming subreddit; they are very helpful sometimes.

I'm officially out of arguably relevant sentences now, but I hope this helps some. Linux is fun + I like it a lot; you should try it !!!

[pocketgalaxies]

Hi! First of all, let me say I LOVE your CR gifsets :) Second, I was wondering how long it typically takes for CR romances to really get going? I really love Imodna and I was also a big Beauyasha fan. I figured Beauyasha was a tad slow because of Ashley's absences, but I never watched C1 and was wondering if VM took a while for romances to get going? Am I just being impatient af by dying for an Imodna love confession in episode 46???

hello thank you!!

so in c1 vaxleth built up for many episodes prior, but the first "you know i'm in love with you right" confession happened in episode 33, and keyleth didn't say it back until episode 65. BUT this is all bearing in mind that the cast played this campaign on and off for several years prior to what's now considered "episode 1"

the cast has said before that pc romance was not even an option in their minds until after vaxleth started, so vex and percy kind of had a late start. they spent the whole campaign flirting because they're flirty people but vex's "my heart is someone else's (percy's)" was in episode 63. taliesin has said that the moment percy fell in love with vex was in episode 59, but i'm not sure whether that was a thing on his mind at the time or if that was in retrospect

i was told ages ago by someone more informed than me that the cast may or may not have a rule that they don't go into romance until after level 10 so characters can be more fully established before they do it. not sure how true that is (maybe someone can confirm or deny? EDIT: check the replies!) but that's something else to consider!

[batwingsandblackcats]

Satyr, Elf, Half Elf for the ask game!

satyr: how did you discover critical role?

A friend of mine @good-and-safe had been talking about it for a while back in 2018 so I decided to give it a shot and now it’s my whole personality

elf: what is your favorite side campaign?

Oohh…Calamity was Stressful but really really interesting

half-elf: who is your favorite guest player?

WHO WOULD TOU MAKE ME CHOOSE?? God I love them all so much, like literally there’s like only two from VM that didn’t hit but the rest are all so amazing.

Sumalee has my heart both as herself and Nila. Anjali also has my heart. AABRIAAAAA. something I’ve been thinking of lately though is that I would love to see Mary Elizabeth McGlynn in a main campaign again. There’s just something about her and I would love to see her in another campaign since it’s been so long since she played with the gang

[critter-genfic-events]

First Aid: A Critical Role Gen-fic Rec List

Well hello friends! Please enjoy these twelve amazing fics featuring First Aid and caregiving! Oh, and don't forget to show the authors some love if you liked their work!

I can think of one thousand places much worse than this by PryingBlackbird (2038,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Caleb & Beau

After their first fight with Lucien, Caleb and Beau get separated. They're hurt and shaken, but at least they have each other

Reccer says: I love the way the empire-siblings are handled here, especially with how they seek comfort without being explicit about it

no one here to sound the alarm by Xhorhasian_Beacon (2933,General) Warnings: None Pairings Essek & Yeza

Essek is injured and has no where else to go than to the man he once hurt.

Reccer says: This has a wonderful balance between I want to help you and I'm still scared of you.

Spit, elbor grease, and a whole lot of gold by Multifandom_damnation (2006,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Ashton & Milo

Milo is very angry at the nobodies as he desperately tries to save ashton's life

Reccer says: I fucking love Milo in this, and the descriptions of his mending Ashton back together is nothing short of stunning

Nettle Leaves and Lavender by Multifandom_damnation (2047,Teen) Warnings: Blood Pairings Ashton & Orym

Orym uses druid craft to try to ease Ashton's pain in any way he can. Set during Episode 35, while Imogen and FCG are in Ashton's brain

Reccer says: I love Orym's internal thoughts as he tries his best to help in what little way he can

sharpen and turn by starrycleric (10132,Teen) Warnings: blood and injury Pairings Caduceus & the Mighty Nein | Caduceus & Caleb

After the fight with Obann, everyone is barely holding on and there's not enough magic to patch them up. Caduceus resorts to non-magical first aid to make sure his friends are okay.

Reccer says: This is some delicious hurt/comfort. The triage is described so well, and the emotionally drained state that everyone is in is just perfect.

These graces that hold me by PryingBlackbird (1607,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Jester & The Mighty Nein

Jester is hit with a Feeblemind spell

Reccer says: A quick bite sized whump-snack. Who doesn't love a good Feeblemind?

No one wants to hurt me, but everybody tries by PryingBlackbird (1416,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Grog & Vox Machina

Grog is hit with a Feeblemind spell

Reccer says: The premise is the same as the Feeblemind Jester fic by the same author, but the tone is way more light hearted. Read if you like comic relief and VM schenenigans.

You were the one thing I could count on by PryingBlackbird (3082,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Essek Thelyss & Verin Thelyss

The presumed dead traitor Essek Thelyss shows up on Taskhand Verin Thelyss' doorstep, he is bleeding and he has nowhere else to go.

Reccer says: The whump and the brotherly banter.

I Preferred My Fantasies by Professor_Rye (1023,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Jester Lavorre & Caduceus Clay, Jester Lavorre & Artagan

Jester discovers the horrors of actually performing CPR on a real person.

Reccer says: I like how it deals with the horror of the situation, as well as Jester's panic. Very angst, we like angst.

Just let me help you by Professor_Rye (2434,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings Caleb Widogast & Nott

That time Caleb and Nott met for the first time in a prison cell, with a barbed wire twist

Reccer says: Professor_Rye just writes the best whump and I'm always soft for early Nott & Caleb

Bleed the Poison Out by Professor_Rye (7286,Mature) Warnings: It's on the darker/bloodier side Pairings Eadwuld & The Clay Family

Eadwuld is kidnapped and tortured and finally manages to escape, in very bad shape. Luckily the blooming grove is nearby.

Reccer says: The whump is exquisite, and the comfort/first aid is too. It's intense, it's bloody, it has my boy Eadwuld. It's all around a good time.

do you have enough love in your heart, to go and get your hands dirty? by SaltCore (4355,Mature) Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence Pairings Astrid & Essek, Essek/Caleb

Caleb is severely injured. Essek is worried out of his mind, but Astrid doesn't trust him.

Reccer says: I really enjoy Astrid's inner monologue

If you liked this rec list, follow along for more! We'll be posting a new list with a new theme each Monday. And if you would like to make a rec yourself, feel free to reach out to @professor-rye to request access to the submission form! Next week, we'll be presenting gen fics about The Gods and their followers! Get ready for some divine devotion!

[tutuandscoot]

I haven’t seen Moulin Rouge so I don’t know the storyline/characters well. How do you interpret Scott in the Roxanne portion? I’m asking about the Olympics version specifically, not the original version. Some people say he’s Christian the whole way through the program but that confuses me? In the Roxanne doc T says she’s “like his puppet” and that’s how I think of it. I think the first half of the program the focus is T’s character and S is more of a threatening figure/force/energy/idk rather than a character. Like he’s this “puppet master” figure and he’s playing off of her. Then somewhere around the Carmen rotational lift he slides into the character of Christian. But I could be way off. How would you best explain his part?

So I have talked about my take on this quite a few times but ofc I’m happy to explain again!

I only watched MR for the first time about 6 months ago and I saw the stage show about 1 year ago. VM’s moulin rouge was always amazing to me though I did find myself kinda making up my own story as a I watched it, now having seen the movie it makes so much more sense and the way I had mostly interpreted the program holds up.

(I’ll give a super brief synopsis first) In the movie Satine works at.. essentially a brothel that moonlights as a theatre company (set in the late 1800’s in Paris), the theatre (named The Moulin Rouge) is desperately bankrupt and may close down, leaving all the performers essentially homeless and forced out to work on the streets (you should know what I mean by that) Satine is the star of the show but nonetheless of it fails she will be helpless and left for dead too. Christian is an aspiring writer from London who shows up in Paris, gets taken to the MR and immediately falls in love with Satine. On this night, the man who runs the theatre has an investor there to watch and potentially fund the theatre, Satine is employed to seduce (F’ck him) to keep the theatre running.

Etc etc etc.. she meets Christian and they fall in love but the have to keep it secret bc she is still wooing the investor.

In the movie (not to spoil too much) but the scene where Roxanne is sung, Satine must ‘go through’ with letting the investor (he’s called the ‘duke’) r*pe her. It cuts between that scene and Christian fearful and heart broken at what Satine is going through, when really he and her could just run off together and never live this life again.

So, I have mostly always interpreted the first half of their program (so the part set to Roxanne) as Scott not actually playing any one character- not Christian but also not the duke. I view it as him playing a manifestation of the life Satine has lived, having to seduce these men and be abused just to stay alive, be this sparking light in this long running theatre production that everyone loves but in reality she is a terrified slave. She has never been allowed to love for the sake of love- she loves for money.

So there is choreography of him grabbing her and stalking her and getting in her face. There were more violent pieces of chore in the original version like in the circle step sequence where he’s just straight up choking her. It’s super upsetting makes your heart ache for T and the character she is playing (bc they are both such beautiful actors it feels so honest),

Sorry, we’re talking about the olys version.

So yes, I interpret it the exact same way as you. Between GPF and Nationals they softened his character a bit to make it more about T’s character- not ‘softened’ like as in their precious loving hugs, but made him less of a domineering presence and instead more of shadow/threat lurking behind her and controlling her every move- he’s controlling her like a puppet- she has no will of her own in the environment she’s trapped in, must perform (both on stage and in the bedroom) upon command. (The movie is not that dark graphically- only in context/undertone and VM definitely psychologically lean into those dark undertones in their program while not performing the most R rated chore possible).

In the olys version I feel his (lack of) character starts to shed from him as they finish the circle step sequence and he stars playing more into Christian’s character and the lyrics and singing get more desperate and it’s very reminiscent of the scene in the movie where he’s so desperate to help her (see my breakdown essay on the rotational lift I explain this part).

When they talk about the jealously in S’s acting I dont interpret so much as the jealousy of Christian but more of the duke being jealous that Satine doesn’t actually love him, even though he doesn’t actually care about that- he just wants attention and his d*ck handled and probs enjoys abusing women bc he can.

It is a bit confusing and I think to understand even the surface level nuances they were feeling and portraying takes multiple watches. It can also I think be interpreted different ways which is fine.

It never made sense to me, even without seeing the movie, that he would be playing the character of Christian the whole way through- I don’t see how she could fall in love with a man who has spent that whole time manipulating her/ abusing her/ playing with her heart.

But then if you did want to interpret it as that.. and just forget about the connection to the story of MR, it could be seen as a bit of a broad comment on the idea of Stockholm Syndrome.. or even a comment on domestic abuse in its self. I’m certainly not inclined to interpret the whole program like this, more so I feel they are themes that could be pulled from it depending on how you looks at- that’s the great think about art.

It does make me think a bit- going with a program like this that is based on a well known movie, well known music and very of the musical theatre genre.. it was a very risky direction to go in such an important season of competition bc while Moulin Rouge is well known, it’s more those two words that are well known- some associate it with the actual MR in Paris, some the movie, some the touring musical (I associate it with my first ever competition dance group where we did ‘Diamonds’), and so if you don’t know the story of the movie… like it’s pretty clear the general structure of the story and that they fall in love and she dies at the end, but the nuances no and then if you have seen the movie, how do you then interpret their characters??

That’s what’s hard and has always bothered me about figure skating- like when people use music from ballets- say for eg Swan Lake and they are dressed as either a white or a black swan but use random pieces of music from throughout the ballet. Swan lake is a 4 act ballet and odile (the black swan) doesn’t turn up till the 3rd act, but some skaters will come out dressed as a black swan but will be using music from the white swan pdd- which is a completely different part of the story and is a different character all together. It really bothers me. If they were to just use white swan (so act 2or 4) and dress as a white swan and they interpreted a specific part from the 3 hour ballet- that would make more sense to me.

What VM did I think now having seen different version of the MR story; they very start with the stat. lift is like a prologue- an introduction/sets the scene. Then moves through kinda what happens behind the scenes at the MR, not the flashy costumes and dancers- that’s where they really interpret the darker themes of the story. The end of Roxanne really encapsulates this pivotal scene in the movie, then Come What May is just all about them and celebrating their love (both in the story and VM..). The death scene in the Olympics version is a bit quick- I really liked the time they took and the emotion poor out of them in that chore earlier in the season, but the final lift in the olys is so iconic and you know exactly what it means- what has happened to her. I really love how they centred the story around T’s character and had her go through and portray all these emotions, while not it anyway was S a background player - it could not have been done with anyone else but those two. The story in this case works in a skating program format because they do manage to tell a story arc that respects the source material- without skipping over parts/ too many music changes.. it’s just extremely well designed and executed piece of art.

It was so incredibly brave of them to go this way bc it was truly something different not just for them but in the direction ice dance was going and has since gone- it really was (I think) the last true ‘showstopping’ program by far on par with and imo more iconic than Bolero and even their Mahler.. but it could’ve done so wrong in the hands of any other ID team, team of assisting coaches, choreographers. If they weren’t the best athletes their sport had ever seen with the skating elements executed near perfectly, then if they weren’t such beautiful actors and dancers with chemistry so hot it melts the ice… the judges may not have got it and it would’ve flipped- only in VM could this program not just flop, but be as iconic as the movie it’s based on (baz essentially said so) .

[theimperiumchronicles]

Happy Favs Friday! What's your favourite thing (tropes, settings, etc.) to put in all of your WIPs?

Ooooh, thank you Anon for asking!! My FAVORITE trope is Found Family. Absolute favorite! It is in all 3 of the major WIP's - @theimperiumchronicles @bombsbodyguardsbroken @bendingthelaws.

I just have started writing @magical-mistakes-vm so I don't know if it will turn up in there somehow or not, but it's probably a safe bet it will come in somewhere and somehow.

In @theimperiumchronicles it is freaking everywhere.

Literal found family in Cruz having found Abriella. Spoiler - Deacon is going to discover he has two sisters in Yael and Phaedra! *eeeeeeee* Div and Lucifer are literally Abriella and Cruz's grandfathers, as well as being literally related to Kaylin, Deacon, Phaedra, and Yael. Talon discovered that Thinius was his dad in the past after having been brought up to believe that Abbadon was. That was a huge shock to both of them and one they struggled with for a while, but they are now best friends, instead of trying to go with typical dad/son dynamic.

And then there is the "Family" of Adriel being Abriella's "dad". Another SPOILER that I haven't even introduced the start of yet...Amon was the same to Yael when she was under Gabriel, and when Gabriel had badly injured her, Amon would come and "kidnap" her till she was healed again when she would manage to "escape" from he and his top General, her "uncle" Heath. She got "kidnapped" a lot.

Another layer of found family are the deep and lasting friendships that are woven throughout the story. Talon and his bio-sis Talia are estranged, but he considers Abriella his sister and Deacon a brother. Dez considers Thinius a brother and Abriella a sister he fucked up with and is trying to fix his relationship with. Deacon considers all of the other Horsemen his siblings, as does Olly. Cruz is the only one who is only close to really close to two people - Abriella and Arch. Why that is will come out, and he will eventually start to trust others, but he has very valid reasons. Most of those in the Palace of Imperium would die for anyone else there. They may not be besties, but there is respect and some form of love. They are a form of family.

In @bombsbodyguardsbroken, the whole team becomes a family. There comes a time when sides have to be taken and two families form, but both think they have Melania's best interest at heart. She is the central character, and she is the heart of the family. They may not always agree on what is best, but they do have her welfare in mind. She loves her team, but there are three people that you do not want to get between her and: her mother, Dontanion, and Francois. In her past, she had been lied to about who they truly were to her. They are the only ones in her life who have never betrayed her or used her and anyone trying to turn her against them will pay dearly for it.

Those around Colin Masterson have formed a type of family. In some cases they have even adopted his own brother Colton Masterson into the fold, running interference between the two siblings who have noble intentions but see the justice system from totally opposing sides in @bendingthelaws. Whether they agree or not, whether they have reasons to hold grudges, when the chips are down, they consider themselves brothers and sisters in arms against Constantin Rakeovich. And when someone sets their sights on taking Colin out, they band together to fight back. They just might not be fighting who they think they are, but they are never fighting alone.

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

baby! box! AU!! given Kaylie is raised with VM in her lives, what does she pick up from them by virtue of them hanging out with Scanlan/babysitting?

Say, Vax teaches her how to cheat at some simple card and boardgames. They play 'ninja' together to see who can sneak around the twins' or Scanlan's apartment most quietly without Vex / Scanlan noticing. One night she was being Difficult about supper so he made cutting up the meat into a game, so she goes 'dagger dagger dagger' while getting Scanlan [or, eventually, herself] to cut her food up until age, like, seven.

Kiki and Vex show her proper animal manners (offer your hand, don't pull their ears or tail, stay away from the face, etc.) with Trinket's patient assistance (with of course lots of breaks for Trinket if he tires of it) and take her on walks in the woods (often with Vax). Kiki 100% gets her one of those chia pet things. Vex will bring her out to icecream and help her through some simple math and budget planning for their 'shopping trip'.

Percy is generally 'I should not be around a Small I will Corrupt Her with my Backstory' but he's very good at explaining her Kid Questions and patient, and she has a few stupidly big or Poncy words in her vocabulary a little early due to him. He helps her with science fairs down the line - more comfortable around her once she's older I think.

Kaylie absorbs a Lot from Grog, obviously, and Pike, but there's just so much it's almost daunting. She uses paint or markers to 'give herself tattoos' often and Scanlan is So Tired but So Fond. Dare Grog to lift big, heavy things - he'll dare her to lift littler ones and then pretend to strain so she feels strong, too. Kaylie puts a sheet on her head to 'have hair like Pike!' [Percy Grumbles about this]. She'll bring a teddy to Pike and ask her to heal it. She has surprisingly good and accurate first-aid instincts thanks to Pike, actually.

Maybe she picks up on Pike's faith a little - Scanlan catches Kaylie praying to Sarenrae one night and his heart just about does a fucking circus act in in his chest.

Maggie this is the cutest thing in the whole world oh my god

Kaylie is just the most well rounded child. She can probably speak a lot of languages too because of them which makes Scanlan so happy, even if sometimes he has to call Vex or Percy to decipher her babble. But Scanlan adores it so much, especially when she starts to pray with Pike in celestial and he can hear her singing in her room.

Her favorite thing to do is to make Grog pick her up and put her on his shoulder so she can be tall like him and they like to wrestle too, in just the most gentle way obvious, but Grog always lets her win.

And she gets so much vocabulary from all of them too, like Scanlan will hear her say something that Grog or Percy says all the time and just feel so fond because he's doing alright, his daughter has so many people who love her and take care of her. And maybe his heart beats a little extra fast when she mimics Pike, but that's no one's business but his.

[essayofthoughts]

you've presented me with the opportunity to talk about how much I love both Ghost Cass AND the Delia AU (even though I am Not caught up on ghost cass ;w;) so! you've obviously touched on a lot of pre-campaign stuff for the ghost cass fic - do you have any specific lore bits that you took and ran with in a way that you really enjoyed/are proud of? and in the Delia AU, I don't know how much you've thought about this, but considering that Percy's aware Cass is out there, what thoughts on her reaction to Delia do you have that goes deeper than just anger and fear on Percy's behalf, if any?

Distract me from feeling like shit with Q's about my WIPs

Aw, I'm glad you like those so much! And fwiw, I am nowhere near done on the next arc of Ghost Cass, you have months in which to catch up.

Re: Ghost Cass

I'm assuming you mean lore from canon here, but developing out Loran the Bear was a lot of fun! All we know about him from the stream is that he ran into VM a few times on a few pre-stream jobs; we get a bit more in the comics but the comics' accuracy to actual events... I would say is speculative. Much as with Ghost Cass, you have to tweak things, add things and remove things, move things around, in order to make a coherent story, so while the comics are fun, I take them with a large pinch of salt.

And that let me build Loran out a bit. Figure out the kind of person he might have been, who he could have travelled with for jobs, how he and VM knew each other - that kind of thing.

That's also tied to the other thing I had a lot of fun with pre-stream which is just... the kids? Because the missing kids are a slow but persistent part of the general pre-stream events; they're the main questline even if it fades in and out of focus. Writing those kids, writing about them, writing their friends who miss them and worry - I really wanted to show the impact these missing children have on their families, their community. It's not just missing children, it's this whole weight of grief and loss that hits many - and that's before we get to the missing, traumatised children themselves!

And that in turn opened up a lot of opportunities to show characterisation. Percy likely grew up with a large extended family, he's probably capable enough with children - but he's also recovering from trauma and dissociation, so his first reaction to having to deal with kids after all that is "AAAAHH". Meanwhile Keyleth and Vax who care so much, wearing their hearts utterly on their sleeves, are immediately invested and caring. And Vex too cares more than she might initially seem to - because she too was captured and taken and had to fight her way home. She prioritises the money they need to live, but she too understands and feels the need to get those children safe if they can. And in turn, all of these things allow the characters to bond and open up to each other, and to set up groundwork for later events. So much of the pre-stream Arc is set up for later, and I can't wait for the payoff.

Re: Delia AU

Oh I know exactly what Cass' reaction to finding about Delia are - because Percy knows that Cass is alive, or at least was when Ripley wrote that entry, but Cass has no idea that Percy is still alive - she's assuming he's dead. That will hold true up until she hears from Yennen that Percy is alive (she in no way believes the Briarwoods, liars as they are), and Yennen by that point has been working with Percy to keep the people of Whitestone safe - Percy does everything in his power to prevent uprisings because he's aware that every dead body is a new one for the ziggurat and a new one for Delilah's undead army. He fights to keep the peace and he does that in coalition with Yennen, Gertie and a few others in town - and these people all come to realise, one way or another, that the only thing keeping him sane and focussed, the one thing that he will truly kill for... is Delia.

So Yennen does not tell Cass of Delia's existence, because keeping Delia safe is one of Percy's primary driving forces.

So uh. Cass' initial response is pure shock, that Percy has a child, that this child seems to resemble Ripley, that (from what Percy says) this child is Ripley's, and yes this means their family isn't eradicated but it also means that Ripley is a part of their family, the family that she killed and uh...

Cass is extremely traumatised. She's scared and she's angry, and she hates Ripley especially much, for betraying them after working for them for so long, for betraying and lying to Percy, for (she thinks for a long time) killing Percy, and then when she learns of Delia's existence, what she assumes has to have happened for Delia to exist and Percy to be perfectly on board with Operation Get Rid of Ripley and The Briarwoods nonetheless.

And... she can't hate Percy for surviving. She thought he was dead, what she feels most of all is relief-

But what the fuck does she feel about Delia? Her brother's daughter, yes. Her niece. A continuation of the family she thought dead and gone.

But also Ripley's child. And a child still young enough that... who knows how they'll turn out? How much like Ripley might she be? And with how much Percy cares about this child, his daughter - how much hurt might that cause Percy, if Delia turns out to be awful, like her mother?

And Percy, she learns, was trapped by Ripley. Lied to and used by Ripley. Delia was a part of Ripley's plan to do that - and look at how Percy dotes on Delia! Look at how Percy refuses to kill Ripley to try to save Delia the grief of losing her mother! The plan worked!

So uh... yeah, Cass displaces a lot of anger and betrayal and grief onto Delia for a while. This is both understandable and fucked up at once, and Percy and she have some very terse, angry conversations about it before the twins step in to have a conversation with Cass.

After all, the twins know what it's like to be a bastard child born in unfortunate circumstances to a noble and someone of a lower class. The fact that Percy loves his daughter so openly and without reserve is a huge help to them dealing with Syldor's bullshit. Cass acting like that about Delia... kind of reminds them uncomfortably of Syldor's bullshit.

(Cass hates being compared to Syldor - she knows the twins well, better than she does anyone else in the group, she met them first. Being compared to their father stings. They're not wrong, though.)

So. Cass does eventually process some of her upset and ends up becoming a good aunt to Delia - as Delia gets older too, she starts seeing what some around them mention, just how much Delia resembles her father not just in looks but in behaviour (after all, he Percy is the primary parental influence in Delia's life) - but it is not an easy start. It is, in fact, extremely rough for everyone.

(Delia at least gets very simple, direct comfort from Percy. "Your aunt is being an idiot," he says. "She's not thinking clearly, she's just feeling. You can ignore her until she sees sense."

(She also gets hugs on a regular basis - Percy's family when he was growing up may not have touched often, but Percy clings to what family he has left and he never, ever wants Delia to feel unloved.)

[xfindingtrouble]

putting on some writing music & i gotta say percy would absolutely like dogs by pink floyd. the song is 17 minutes long, existential & focuses on the consequences of your actions. no one can change my mind on this. i already think modern verse percy would like the whole animals album but this song specifically has so many lines that remind me of him prior to him traveling with VM. it almost makes me think of him looking at that isolated / angry part of his life & the tunnel vision he got with orthax's aggravation poking at him from the back of his mind? like the song in itself could be him having a moment of retrospection honestly.

A certain look in the eye and an easy smile You have to be trusted by the people that you lie to So that when they turn their backs on you, You'll get the chance to put the knife in

You gotta keep one eye looking over your shoulder You know it's going to get harder, and harder, and harder as you get older

And when you loose control, you'll reap the harvest you have sown And as the fear grows, the bad blood slows and turns to stone And it's too late to lose the weight you used to need to throw around

Gotta stay awake, gotta try and shake off this creeping malaise If I don't stand my own ground, how can I find my way out of this maze?

Deaf, dumb, and blind, you just keep on pretending That everyone's expendable and no-one has a real friend and it seems to you the thing to do would be to isolate the winner And everything's done under the sun And you believe at heart, everyone's a killer

[dent-de-leon]

Satyr, elf, dwarf, genasi, paladin, bard, fighter, warlock

Hi!! this got a little rambly and long lmao but here we go:

Satyr: how did you discover critical role

okay so!! This was apparently just before crit role started streaming, cause it was 8 years ago, and anyway, I went to a signing for Matt at a con. I'm incredibly shy, but he was just very nice and friendly. Some time later, I started seeing pretty VM art and heard people talking about this DND thing that Matt Mercer did with some other VA's and I was like, oh!! I've heard of him!

I tried getting right into C1 but I felt like it was maybe a little daunting to catch up at that point. But then not long after, C1 wrapped up, and they announced they were doing another campaign. So it seemed like the perfect opportunity to start watching, be there right for the beginning of the new game. And I still remember when C2 was first teased, they posted this art of the party--but just their sihlouettes.

And it was just so fun to see everyone guessing at what kind of class everyone was and who was playing what character, and there was!! this one very striking sihlouette in particular! This one with HORNS and pretty jewelry and!! tHIS ADORABLE LITTLE TAIL!! and anyway I saw that sihlouette and I was like!! That one! I want to see that one! And watched the first episode of C2 live absolutely vibrating with excitement and when Mollymauk first showed up I knew I was already so far gone, it was hopeless--

Elf: what is your favorite side campaign

I really liked EXU Calamity!! Even if it absolutely broke my heart, it was just so much fascinating world building and character arcs. And I'm just so weak for anything related to the Age of Arcanum.

Dwarf: what is your favorite one-shot

THE SONG OF THE LORELEI!! I love blood hunters and werewolves and the concept of all the PCs being family. The sibling rivalry and banter, the mysterious family history and the way each character chooses whether to carry on this legacy or find their own path--there's just a lot of little things I loved.

Genasi: who is your favorite campaign 3 character (so far)

Funnily enough, my favorite character is a genasi, and it's Ashton!! I love the whole concept of dunamancy as raw, primal power and chaos--as opposed to the very refined science of spellwork and theorems we see from Dynasty wizards. It's just such an interesting contrast and the unpredictability of it is so fun. Love watching Taliesin react to what he rolls for those chaos bursts.

Also adore Ash's whole personality and the little so far we've uncovered about their past. I love his little found family and the way they're so protective of people when they insist they don't have friends. Grappling with their fear of abandonment and attachment, gradually learning to up again and heal. Also, Taliesin playing another trans character just makes me so so happy. Soft barbarian my beloved,,

Paladin: what is your favorite friendship

aHH the circus kids!! I think it's such a tragedy that we never got to see more of them, and it makes all of their little moments all the more heartfelt and poignant. Yasha saying that she just got attached to Molly because "he was Molly," seeing him in all his color and vibrance and joy--"he was so beautiful." A spark of life when she had been traveling so long in the wastes, where everything was dead and nothing grew, where there was no color in the world. And then there's Molly, and he shines like a beacon.

Molly making sure Yasha has ways to find them when they leave town. Kissing her on the forehead when she comes back. The aftermath of the Zone of Truth spell, when Molly's just leaning into her for comfort and thanking her for being there for him. Molly opening up to Yasha about being genderfluid, about how he really feels and what his tattoos mean to him.

Molly waking from the resurrection feeling so lost and pained and Empty--running away and holding his head in his hands until Yasha goes to his side and comforts him, promises him he's not Empty anymore. The sheer adoration and warmth in his voice when he calls her Love, the moments when he gives her the biggest hug and hands her the flowers he picked just for her and Beau.

The fact that Molly spent so long at the circus waiting for the next time Yasha would show, trusting that she'd always come back when she's ready, that she'd never leave them for good. Yasha still faintly hoping and praying, mourning Molly for so long until finally, finally--he comes home. And this time, Yasha gets to be the one to welcome him back and bring some color and warmth to his life.

Bard: what is your favorite “how do you want to do this?”

The vision of Yasha ripping Obann's wings off while lit by the temple's shattered stained glass is just so very thematically satisfying and striking, I'll never get over it.

But Jester staring down at Lucien and telling Molly that she knows he's in there, that they all love him so much and they want him back--that always breaks me. The poetry of Jester being the one to strike down Lucien when she's the one who read his tarot cards and told him, "Facing you is death," but says it is a comfort. Death--not as cruelty or something monstrous, but as a new beginning, an end so something new can be born--death coming to you and sitting beside you, holding your hand and telling you it will be okay.

Two tieflings, two parts of a matching set, a deck drawn by them both--Jester and Molly, death and rebirth. I love them so much.

Fighter: what was your favorite funny moment

I absolutely adore the classics of 1) Vox Machina spends like four spell slots, 25 minutes, and takes 10 damage trying to open x1 door in Whitestone, and 2) THE HOSPITAL HEIST and especially eVERYTHING Molly did for it. The image of him crashing through a window full of glass and acting like he just did a ten point landing and then jumping into Fjord's arms while he's trying to convince some nearby guards that Molly ran off in the opposite direction--pure art.

Warlock: what is your favorite critical role merch 

MOLLY AND JESTER'S TAROT DECK!! I've been longing for that merch for years and it's everything I wanted. I love the little introduction written from Molly's point of view and all the lore tidbits we get about Moonweaver worship and Moonweaver oracle decks. I've also just always had a love of tarot cards, and this is actually my first oracle deck, so I was really excited!

The way these decks are often destroyed and rebuilt from scratch over and over, sometimes as often as the passing phases of the moon--how this reflects Molly's own soul and his fluidity in transformation and renewal between lives. The fact that Molly really does use his cards to try and help people, and that there's another group aligned with Ruidus who make red moon decks designed just to deceive and manipulate their marks.

Molly's cards and art being influenced by the ideals of Moonweaver worship and his heart for adventure and romance. The way he really did draw cards for all the Mighty Nein, making them a part of his life and the story his deck tells--I just love him and Jester and this lovely collaboration of art they did together. (Also, Jester's little notes in the margins of the pamphlet are so cute!)

[misledyouth222]

A letter written at 1:30am to a dead lover’s Facebook messager::

Dear Sisqo,

Dear god if anyone ever has your password and sees this, man I’m gonna look like a dipshit 😂

I had this whole notes app thing written out, and had planned on sharing it with fucking DMX of all ppl soon, but somehow in my perpetual idiocy deleted literally every note from my phone🫠 v like me.

You called me….god I think I’m 2019? I was at my husbands fam lake house (his name is Mark Hoppus and you’d definitely pick him over me if this was high school), and for a second I was going to answer it and run outside to see what was up, if everything was okay, etc. but my brain got the best of me and I sent you to vm, and you left me the nicest message of how I had just crossed your mind, and you wanted to call to see how I was doing. I brushed it off like nothing bc tbh I expected to be in ~crappy home town~ any time then, and figured I’d see you at ~*dumb brewery*~

I goddamn wish I had picked up the phone. Idk what was going on, or why you called, but that was my unknown last opportunity to talk to you. To may have a good heart to heart. To be a fucking adult and tell you how shitty of a person I was, and how I regretted forever how I was to you, and how selfish I was that I hoped that it was all in the past and you forgave me or some shit.

My ~anonymous family member~ texted me the day it happened. He works at the *made up job like pizza delivery*, which I think you knew bc you had kept up with him kind of. I cried. I fucking bawled like a bitch. And then felt awful bc I felt that I didn’t deserve to have feelings, bc of the shite teenager I was. But I was torn up. I am torn up. Fuck me man, like I found my fucking live journal of all goddamn things, and even things you told me when we were broken up and barely were friends, you were literally one of the best friends I ever fucking had. And I threw that shit away like fucking garbage bc I was a selfish, no good, self centered bitch.

I didn’t go to your memorial at your house. I wanted to. I basically had gotten ready to leave, and backed out. I honestly didn’t know if I’d be welcome. I know that your family didn’t like me literally at all when we finally broke up (obviously for good reason), and I am a perpetual chicken and didn’t go.

Did you know this is how me, and Jay-Z, and DMX reconnected?! I hadn’t talked to Jay-Z in like, fuck 15 years! And DMX as you know basically hides in the darkness of all social media, so I literally hadn’t seen or talked to him since….fuck. 2013. I think I saw you more recently than DMX. I still haven’t gotten up with him bc life, schedules, whatnot. I mean to get up and fall into misledyouth222- land and just falls to the wayside. As you’re familiar.

I had planned on going to your memorial service. I told Jay-Z and DMX they had to go with me. But —- I felt like I shouldn’t. I still didn’t know if I should bc idk how your fam would take seeing this fucking ghost from the past, and I didn’t think it was the time or place. jay-z understood, as he does.

That morning, I went a show at ~*~crappy dive bar in a new crappy hometown~*~, an acoustic set by && lead singer of Americana band&&. I think you’d have liked them, alt country but damn he has a way with words. He was performing his new album before it was released, playing the songs for ppl for the first time. One of the songs was about a friend he had from high school, whom he had lost. When I tell you that I literally broke down in a goddamn dive bar at 1130 in the morning.

Sisqo. You were one of the best friends I’ve ever had. I definitely took you for granted, and I know that now in my (somewhat) wiser age. You were a friend, good person for life, and I fucked that up supremely. I loved you to death, Sisqo. I did. I was a selfish asshole who deserved the dumb poem you wrote and posted on deviant art that I found sophomore year of college bc I was a goddamn weirdo who googled that and literally, deserved every goddam mean thing you said about me. I hope that somewhere down the line, you forgave me.

The last time I saw you, I was sitting at ~*dumb brewery*~ by myself, trying to hook up with another ex from high school bc I was in a newly single (from that asshole you met with the giant head that I almost married but thank god I didn’t bc he may have been the karma I deserved from being such a fucking dumbass for so long) - I was sitting at the bar, alone, and every time you walked by, you made sure I was okay, gave me your dumb big grin, and when I left you told me to be careful, have fun. I gave you a huge hug. I think we ended things finally on an okay note, kid.

There will always be a little Sisqo-sized hole in my heart for you. You were the nicest, sweetest, most patient person I had ever met. You know the shit I went through with other relationships, and you were always there for me. I’ll love you forever.

Also - Im definitely going to use this as a frame of reference when I finally get up with DMX, bc I had started to talk to him about it via text, and you know him, phone advert, said my nervous breakdown was better suited for in person. 😂 and my idiot self deleted my notes app apology. So this rambling bullshit has to do.

Love you, kid ♥️

*names && locations changed to protect the guilty.