#but almost every interaction I have with cis 'allies'

[cistematicchaos]

🫤 Mh. Not sure what to think of the fact I know my therapist has read all the notes my psyciatrist made about me, including the fact I’m trans and what my pronouns are(we’ve even discussed it) and then today she misgendered me to my face. Huh. 

I had to play it back to actually convince myself I wasn’t mishearing and then I spent a bit trying to convince myself maybe she just didn’t know until I remembered we’ve LITERALLY TALKED ABOUT MY GENDER AND PRONOUNS. I know this is one of those situations where I’m going to have to walk her through the fact my pronouns are not optional little extras she can pick or choose whether to use but sjasflesahse I guess I was just hoping I wouldn’t HAVE to do that. But nope. I guess not. 😮‍💨

[butmakeitgayblog]

Just to throw in a couple points real quick (because I can never keep an opinion to myself 😔 sorry), I personally kind of dislike the idea of a male and female gaze — not because I disagree with the concept of fetishism and objectification existing, they ABSOLUTELY do, but because of what people, particularly online, have come to accept they mean.

There has recently been discourse surrounding Love Lies Bleeding, a film created almost solely by queer women, “catering to the male gaze” which… I’m sure I don’t need to explain how silly that is lmao. I think this new wave of leftists clutching their pearls over literally any sign of sexual attraction and considering it to be synonymous with objectification has distorted people’s views of what these terms actually mean and have resulted in their gross misuse. Not to make this about me 💅🏻 but I see a lot of this similar discourse about trans people BY CIS PEOPLE whom are trying to be good allies by basically claiming that any sign of sexual attraction towards a trans person’s body is inherently fetishistic which I can’t lie… I kind of consider to be transphobic itself lol? You’re allowed to be sexually attracted to trans people and express that, no matter how their bodies look! The point at which it becomes fetishistic relies primarily on the WAY you express that and the language used — and I think that can apply to queer people in general too. I personally (and others may feel differently!) have zero issue with cis people enjoying trans NSFW content, and I also have no problem with straight women enjoying MLM content; because most of the time, I can tell from the LANGUAGE they use whether or not they are fetishising.

Point being, fetishism and objectification can go ALL ways and I don’t think people need to give excuses as to why they enjoy a certain type of content as long as it isn’t actively harming anyone. But I obviously can’t speak for everyone (especially queer women, I only identified as one for a year or two when I was a preteen lol) and people’s experiences tend to shape their opinions on these things 😅

Right and that's why I firmly stand behind my initial post about how it's no one's job to police people for what kind of content they consume! Because we don't know their motivations for how ot why they personally are interacting/consuming the work. It's incredibly easy to write off all enjoyment of a specific brand of content as fetishizing or sexualization when in reality, for the consumer it isn't that at all. My only point on the last ask was that sometimes, sometimes, it's easy to actually be doing exactly that (fetishizing etc) and not realizing it.

Intentions matter absolutely, but they're not the be-all-end-all of reality. It's like if I as a white person were to say something racist without realizing it was racist. That doesn't negate the racism, and it doesn't absolve me of my culpability, because my ignorance to my actions doesn't supercede my impact. You can be guilty of something without knowing that you are, and that's something you as person have to evaluate and confront on a personal basis. That was my only point in relation to what that anon said.

Again to reiterate, that is NOT saying that everyone who prefers queer work to straight work is guilty of that, because they're not. Full stop. And that alone is why I don't think anyone has or should have the authority to pass judgment on who can and can't consume certain kinds of media. Because, like you said, then you start wading into the murky waters of painting everyone with a broad brush, throwing accusations around that are universally damning despite not actually being universally true. And considering we're living in a period where puritan anti-sex brainrot is on the rise (alongside a deeply unsettling culture of condemnation over every little thing), opening that door can become very dangerous very fast. We're seeing it already.

I will tack on just as a thought regarding the trans character issue, I think that's kind of a perfect example of all these ideas aligning. Just in the most bare bones way of putting it: there is nothing inherently fetishizing about a cis person enjoying work including trans characters. There's nothing inherently fetishizing about a cis person enjoying, specifically, smut involving trans characters. There is nothing inherently fetishizing about a cis person preferring trans character stories over other kinds of media. However, if all they as a cis person consume is extremely sexualized renditions of trans characters, if their only interest in trans characters is porn - generally mostly devoid of complex storylines that create a fully rounded character -, then yeah I do think that's something they on an individual basis need to evaluate about themselves, because it's the difference between having a sexual attraction to a subsection of people versus seeing those same people as purely sexual objects. Does that make sense?

Same can be true for any other queer content being consumed by people that aren't historically the target audience.

But again, it's not really anyone else's place to make that call for anyone else.

[daughter-of-sapph0]

observations of radfems I've made in the past couple months

literally none of them experience joy. at least not as far as I can see. they are constantly seething and screaming about things that have little to no effect on everyday life. I'm convinced they don't have jobs or friends because it seems they never go outside and interact with normal people

they don't hate men. they actually love men who agree with them. when they say "men" they actually mean trans woman. when they say "radfem allies" that means men who are transphobic. like matt walsh or graham linehan. any hatred they have towards men is fake. they love cis men. most of them are married to cis men and have multiple children. some even fully adopt the trad lifestyle, which is rooted in the idea that women should be submissive to their husband.

as an addendum to the last one, they are extremely lesbophobic. they hate pretty much every lesbian. they think lesbian sex is gross. they think lesbians being masculine or butch is a harmful stereotype. they think lesbians being femme is harmful and reductive to womanhood or whatever. they nitpick and attack every little thing any lesbian does. mostly because the majority of lesbians are trans inclusive.

a lot of them believe that there's two types of women. not trans women and cis women. two types of CIS women. those who dedicate their entire lives to transphobia and bigotry and cut off their friends and family, and "the other women" or "sex traitors" or "closet trannies" or whatever they call them. they're literally just normal cis women who aren't transphobic. but terfs see them as a lower class of women simply because they don't share the same hateful bigoted views. they convince themselves that all normal cis women who aren't insanely bigoted are actually brainwashed and in a cult and also secretly trans men.

they have stupid names for weird little subgroups. you think leftist infighting is stupid, you should see fascist infighting. literally none of them like each other. they each call each other different names. you probably know "libfem" which is a radfem who isn't transphobic enough (which i should point out is very similar to conservatives calling everyone they don't like a liberal). or "rudefems" which are radfems who constantly post about wanting to commit hate crimes. but there's also moidfems, rushfems, redfems, pocfems, kekfems, blupfems, and schlingofems (okay I made those last two up. but the rest are real). it's like the same way that 4chan users add "-cel" to the end of every word. it's almost as if 4chan incels and tumblr radfems are the exact same group of people.

[bronx-bomber87]

Oh my lord where to begin…My adrenaline from that ep was sky high in the best way. First off the ep as a whole was fantastic I enjoyed every bit. Chenford had my heart racing the entire episode. This is the kind of angst I’m talking about. Where it drives them and their story forward. We got to have a glimpse into them dealing with Lucy as UC deep cover as a couple for first time. Having days apart from each other. It was fascinating and amazing to watch.

First off they looked like a BAMF power couple in the beginning at roll call my god. Tim ensuring his CI would be sure to take care of her cause he asked, and it was about her. That CI must’ve gotten some fierce protector Tim. Her calling it ‘Under Cover Love’ and him smirking. Loves this woman so much.

The flirting they had going on was primo. Her trying to check in on him emotionally and him combatting it with his version of flirting with her. His stupid in love smile when she calls him a jerk. I’m diabetic at how sweet this interaction was. Telling him not to watch top chef without her. I love the idea of them snuggled up binging shows together. Little glimpse into their non work life.

These chats on the phone gave me serious Alias vibes which made me happy. Show was my first love and ship. If you ever watched that show you’ll know what I’m referring to. The main ship was a handler and his agent. I was getting that from this mission and loving it. The fierce protector watching his love do her thing and trying to keep himself in check. He was visibly shaken by the possibility of Frank making a move on Lucy. Didn’t hide his feelings at all. He was twitching almost at the thought. Grey trying to help him rein it in. Poor Tim.

Watching his whole body reaction to her being ok after the drive by. The audible sigh of relief. Eric really crushed this episode with his reactions/facial expressions while she was in the field. Melissa too crushed this episode. The desperation in her voice when he suggests meeting up at her laundry room. She’s so eager to get to the one who centers her and make her feel safe. That hug was cathartic for them both. First time both of them could breathe.

The rest of that scene phew lord. If you needed their chemistry on display. Watch that scene. Lightning in a bottle chemistry these two. Eric and Melissa are so good at conveying so much by doing the smallest things. His facial expressions, the way she touches his jacket and leans into him. Wanting him to check in with her because he’s clearly shaken. Her confronting him with it. She knows he’s not ok and wants him to talk to her. He’s trying to do what Grey told him and treat her like any other UC.

The hitch in her voice when he tries to leave and she tells him to lock the door. My god. They legit had adrenaline filled I almost got killed laundry room sex. His smirk after she says it. I’m here for it. This ep delivered so much. I loved him bringing it back up later. After he knows she’s done. I was smiling so hard. One of the best eps of season IMO. Has so much goodness.

The cuteness of them at her apt. Her wanting sexy time with him before she conks out. Then poor Tim his PTSD from Isabel was showing hard. Saying how she would’ve unwound from an op. Lucy countering with what SHE would do. He’s still stuck in his PTSD when she asks about the ally arrest. Where he almost died. She wants to know these things Tim. Her calling him out on it. Saying she isn’t Isabel. She isn’t gonna react or decompress the same.

I love that she challenges him still. That hasn’t changed since they got together. Forces him to face what he’s feeling and tell her. This is the kind of angst I’m wanting and talking about. It’s productive and so good for them. Moves them forward as a couple. By her doing this he finally voices a fear of his. Her not listening when he wants her to pull away. Her reassuring she would never let it get that deep or far. Then the best line of the scene. Him voicing his deepest fear of all. Losing her the way he lost Isabel. Her reassuring him again and getting another cathartic hug in. So proud of him for telling her this. It was needed after last ep.

Hot damn this episode was good. Eric and Melissa were incredible solo and together. Their ability to command a scene emotionally whether that’s together or solo floors me. We’re so lucky to have them and get to watch them. I can’t believe this is the second to last episode, but I’m a happy camper said it all season. Could not be happier with this season if I tried. Anxious and excited to see what this finale will bring for them. ❤️

[lunainthemoona]

cis women you are not automatically my allies. stop fucking acting like it. i am tired of letting it slide, cis women act like everyone’s allies and then will subtlety hate crime you and pretend like YOU’RE at fault when you get upset about it. i have the same interaction with almost every cis woman i know and im exhausted of it. tell me to slay one more time and i will bomb your house

[riiseandfall]

ben barnes . cis man . he / him ➶ I RECOGNISE THAT FACE ! that’s AIRK DOVECOTE , the FORTY year old MEMBER OF SNOW’S CABINET from THE CAPITOL . they’ve been in the capitol around THEIR WHOLE LIFE , long enough to gain a reputation for being so PROTECTIVE & UNYIELDING . they’re so lucky getting to live in the tribute center for the duration of the games! ( character ISN’T part of the uprising ) 

Basic Information

Full Name: Airk Regulus Dovecote Nicknames: N/A Age: 40 District: The Capitol Gender: Cis man Pronouns: He / him Orientation: Bisexual Profession: Trainer, member of Snow's Cabinet/Security to President Snow

Physical Appearance

Face Claim: Ben Barnes Hair Color: Black Eye Color: Dark brown Height: 6'2" Piercings: N/A Scars: A scar on his left hip, a scar across the inside of his left palm, several assorted small scars

Relationships

Father: Invictus Dovecote (Deceased) Mother: Alana Dovecote Siblings: WC Extended Family: Ariadne Dovecote (Cousin) Significant Other: Juniper Torrance (Wife) Children: Chantilly "Tilly" Torrance (Daughter), Bobbin Torrance (Son)

Extra

MBTI: ESTJ-A (The Executive) Temperament: Choleric Moral Alignment: Lawful Neutral Primary Vice: Pride Primary Virtue: Temperance Element: Fire

BIO-[TW: MENTION OF DEATH]

The Dovecote name has always held weight in the capitol-the kind of weight that insured that Airk had a rather blessed life growing up. His father held a seat on President Snow's cabinet and, even better? Held President Snow's favor.

Airk learned to never ask any real questions about just what it was that his father did. His mother always told him that he handled security for President Snow. A simple and straightforward answer. One that Airk--and most of the capitol--didn't question and Invictus was often seen at President Snow's side.

Despite being part of a capitol family--and therefore having no worry about winding up in the arena--Invictus trained Airk as if he were a career. Started young and pushed hard, kept him on his toes--he trained his son to be more than a fighter, he trained him to be lethal.

Airk never questioned it, in fact he took to training well. Never questioned. Part of him assumed that maybe his father was going to send him to be a peacekeeper, but even as Airk grew older, he stayed right in the capitol. His father taught him about the political side of the capitol, took him to a couple of meetings when he was old enough, told him to keep a sharp eye. At the end, his father would question him on seemingly random things. Tiny details that seemed pointless to notice--everything from what a person was wearing to the way they interacted with others. Airk grew up learning to be very perceptive, he learned to adapt.

It didn't take long for him to realize that his father was training him to replace him one day.

As a young man, Airk learned the truth about what his father did. He protected the President from any potential threats--specifically the people Snow decided were threats. Enemies were made when you were in a position of power, it was their job to remove those enemies from the playing field. Less security and closer to an assassin for Snow.

A job that Airk would one day take over.

All that physical skill earned him a spot training at the tribute center--every year when the games rolled around. It paid well, not that he really had a need for money. And he took pride in his job. When it came to the tributes, he truly did his best to try to keep them alive in the arena. Even though he knew only one would make it back out.

The death of his father was a surprise, and the job that Airk had trained to take over was placed onto his shoulders at an age younger than they expected. But he stepped into the role well, all that training paid off and Airk proved himself an invaluable member of Snow's cabinet. And an invaluable ally to have on his side like his father before him.

Life settled into something almost monotonous after that. Not the Airk didn't care for the social events that his job gave him access to, but they all seemed to blur together almost. Things had grown almost dull among the bright colors of the capitol.

Until Juniper came into his life.

It wasn't just her beauty that drew him in--it was her strength. Her intelligence and independence, there were some who were intimidated by Juniper--but never Airk.

They were only able to speak rarely, those far too brief moments where June was in the capitol, but Airk held those moments so close to his heart. Years passed and the flirtatious back and forth between the two turned into so much more. There were...complications, of course. A capitolite falling in love with someone from the districts. But Airk didn't share June's concerns, he knew he would do whatever it took to spend his life at her side.

June said she would marry him the third time he asked.

It was a small affair, quiet and private. But there are eyes and ears everywhere in the capitol and nothing escapes Snow's attention for long.

But Snow approved. To a degree. So long as June didn't prove a distraction, he gave his blessing to the happy couple. Allowed Airk a good amount of time with his wife--and, later on, their children--so long as his attention was where it needed to be every other week of the year.

Airk agreed. But he longs to spend more time with his family, the three people he loves more than anything in this world.

But one doesn't just leave the employ of the President. So Airk continues to serve faithfully in the hopes that one day? He will be allowed to spend his life how he wishes.

Those hopes were dashed the moment Tilly's name was drawn. When June stepped forward to volunteer to go in with her (but Airk knew she would, would she be the woman he loved if she didn't?)

It doesn't feel fair. It isn't fair to June--who had already been through that horror once before and emerged victorious, something that should have guaranteed her safety. It isn't fair to Tilly, who was far too young for this. And after everything he did for the capitol? For Snow? Even Airk-ever loyal-thinks it unfair to him.

For the first time in his life, he is beginning to question things, but as he prepares to watch his wife and child go back into that arena? He thinks his eyes have been opened far too late.

[omnipah]

Roy from fullmetal alchemist for the character ask? :D

Sexuality Headcanon:

either bi or straight with bi vibes. the biggest ally ever if he's straight tho, like in a way that's almost annoying except u can tell he means it

Gender Headcanon:

mostly cis but like. you do not grow up around that many women (especially women whose literal job is to be quite traditionally femme) and not have a certain appreciation for womanhood, yknow? like he's not transfemme but he also wouldn't necessarily correct u if u assumed he was, kind of thing

A ship I have with said character:

hawkeye, obviously. the old king/knight dynamic with a sexy anti-militarist twist and also Gender

A BROTP I have with said character:

we don't really get to see much of them interacting in the story but i feel like hawkeye's friendship with winry would be something he'd be like. awkwardly adopted into. especially as allies in bullying ed

A NOTP I have with said character:

royed seems pretty popular in some circles and it just does not do it for me. like even if u somehow get around the age gap it just does not vibe

A random headcanon:

obviously this technically doesn't apply in-setting the way it would in modern times but that is a man who loves a spreadsheet. like he probably won't give a shit about like uniform breaches but god help u if ur expenses don't line up this month. on the other hand getting them done right every time is one of the ways hawkeye flirts with him that is incomprehensible to the rest of the team

General Opinion over said character:

i think he's nifty! i'm glad there's less focus on him in brohood than in fma03 cus i think fma03 tries a bit too hard to have him be a sort of heroic aragorn type, and i think thematically it works better if he's on more equal footing with his allies and friends. but i also like brohood giving him more nuance, the dark-past-redemption-via-coup works better in that version imo

[trans-axolotl]

Intersex Terminology Guide

Hi everyone! I thought I'd make a guide of basic intersex vocabulary and definitions. I will link to sources when relevant!

intersex: "A difference in sex traits, that happens on its own, and is noticeable enough to cause stigma or violence for breaking an anatomical expectation. " -Hans Lindhal, intersex activist.

"Intersex is an umbrella term for differences in sex traits or reproductive anatomy. Intersex people are born with these differences or develop them in childhood. There are many possible differences in genitalia, hormones, internal anatomy, or chromosomes, compared to the usual two ways that human bodies develop."- InterACT

Intersex variation: A specific variation and diagnosis such as Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia, Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, Turner's Syndrome, or Klinefelter's Syndrome. Here's a link to a glossary of many common intersex variations!

Intersexism/dyadism/interphobia: A term to describe intersex oppression. Intersex oppression is rooted in ableism, and manifests through things like medical abuse, harassment, sexual violence, stigma, and pathologization. Here is one working definition for intersexism: "Intersexism is a type of ableism; ableism that is influenced by and rooted in the cisheteronormative idea of how a man or woman needs to function. This “function” is a construct of what settler-colonialism and capitalism see as the most effective way to use gender as exploitation and extraction of profit."-written by Mod Stev of @intersex-support.

Intersex Surgery/Intersex genital mutilation: A term to describe a category of genital surgeries that happen at birth. These surgeries are cosmetic and not medically necessary, and are focused on "normalizing" ambiguous genitalia and sterilization. Here's a report on intersex surgery and interviews with intersex adults. Intersex surgery is legal is almost every country.

Non consensual hormone therapy: A lot of intersex teens and adults are coerced or forced into taking hormones that they do not want to be taking. This happens to both cis and trans intersex people.

Dyadic/Perisex/Endosex: All words that mean someone who is not intersex. Whichever word people use is basically up to personal preference and community norms.

Intergender: Intergender is a gender identity for use by intersex people only. It doesn’t have one specific definition-it is used by intersex people to mean a whole variety of things. It’s used to describe the unique ways our intersex experience intersects with and influences our gender. Some people use it as a modifying term, such as calling themselves an intergender man or woman, as a way to explain the way being intersex affects their identity. Other people identify solely as intergender, and have that be their whole gender. A lot of intergender people consider themselves to be trans, but not all. Here is the intergender flag.

Ipsogender: A gender identity used by intersex people who identify as the gender they were assigned at birth, but feel that being intersex plays into their gender identity and that their experiences are not adequately described by cisgender.

Outdated terminology:

DSD: DSD stands for disorders of sex development, and is the medical term for intersex. DSD terminology was created at the intersex consensus meeting in 2005 by 50 medical experts and two intersex activists, one from ISNA. The DSD terminology shift was also created with the input of a dyadic transphobes who were involved in the shift in ISNA's intersex activism where they distanced themselves from trans and queer politics and instead allied with doctors and medicalization. Some intersex people still do use DSD terminology for themselves, but dyadic allies should avoid it.

Derogatory Language:

Hermaphrodite: This is probably the most common slur used against intersex people. It should never be said by dyadic people, and should never be said to refer to humans. Only intersex people can reclaim hermaphrodite. There is a scientific meaning to hermaphrodite when referring to animals, and dyadic people should only say it in that context and also be considerate if posting things with that word on social media. Hermaphrodite has a very violent history and is a very painful word for many intersex people. If you see someone referring to the "h slur," this is probably the slur they are referring to.

He-she: This is a derogatory term that a lot of intersex people and trans women are called. Similar to the h slur, there is a history of violence and harassment with this term, and a lot of intersex people have been negatively impacted by this term. Dyadic people should never call intersex people a "he-she." It's good to avoid typing out he-she whenever possible, and if referring to someone who uses both he/him and she/her pronouns, saying "she/he" or "him/her" pronouns is a better option.

Futanari: This is essentially the Japanese translation of the h slur. It is used with a lot of fetish content that primarily targets intersex people. Dyadic people should not call real life people "futa" and need to understand that this is an incredibly offensive term. Futanari is also not the Japanese word for intersex; a Japanese intersex activist website uses インターセックス.

other intersex people feel free to add on, or offer alternative definitions!

[lizzylucky]

•Masterpost (Incomplete)•

Contents Below The Cut: About Me, Other Blogs I Run, Fandoms, Blorbos, Tag List (TBD), Other Media Platforms (TBD)

[Cut-Insert appears to be missing from Mobile? Will be fixed on Computer]

:readmore:

About Me (sorry, 'tis a lot):

Hi! My name is Elizabeth. I have many (MANY) nicknames, but the one I usually go by online is Lizzy.

I am a heterosexual, cis-gendered female, who prefers she/her pronouns. I'll be 22 on June 1st this year ('22)!

I'm an aspiring... Everything, really. Author/Actor/Poet/Artist/Animator/Singer/Interior Architect/Dancer?/Seamstress/Pet Keeper..... I just love to create and share!!

I consider myself an ally. I'm not perfect, not a reliable source of LGBT+ info, and have lots to learn. Regardless, I will NEVER judge you for your gender, sexual orientation, attraction, age, gender, race, circumstance, or opinion. I also will never force MY perceptions on you. I will ALWAYS respect your preferred pronouns to the best of my ability, and will always respect your opinions even when I disagree You are safe to be yourself with me, and if I ever do or say something harmful or misinformative, you have my permission, nay, my encouragement, to call me out, educate me, ask I delete or alter something, or contact me privately. I will do everything I can to be a neutral grounds, and all inclusive; THIS IS A PROMISE.

I am neurodivergent and mentally ill; diagnosed with Autism and Acute Anxiety, have had two medical professionals agree I have Clinical Depression, ADHD, OCD, and PTSD, and I personally believe I have Executive Function Disorder, too. Again, I'm not a perfect source of information, but I'm knowledgeable enough; and open-minded. To reiterate, if you have any of these or similar, YOU ARE SAFE HERE. You can stim, vent, rant or info dump; I will be THRILLED to be a part or listen; because this is exactly what I am like in real life. You never have to apologize for anything "weird" or "quirky", or for "being depressing", or having a lot to say or repeatedly interacting or flooding my inbox or always focusing on the same topics- Never.

Other Blogs I run:

Lizart Central, @lizart-central This is where you can find ALL my art. And just art! It's a semi-new-ish blog, so it won't have art older than a couple years. Take a look!

The Story Of Officially, @thestoryof-officially This started as a 365 writing prompts challenge. I decided to try doing it every year, too, but never once completed the challenge. It's been inactive for a while, but I intent to pick it back up again soon.

Perler Pattern Mania, @moonstonedragon This blog is purposed entirely to perler bead patterns and projects! It is... VERY old, and has been inactive for a long time. There's not tons of content, but feel free to check it out!

Fandoms

Cartoons -- Ninjago, She-Ra, DuckTales, Danny Phantom, Gravity Falls, My Little Pony, Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure, Tales of Arcadia, Avatar The Last Airbender, The Dragon Prince, Big Mouth/Human Resources, Invader Zim, Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, Far-Fetched

Anime -- Digimon Adventure/02/Tri, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Miraculous Ladybug, Ghost Hunt, This Art Club Has A Problem/There's A Problem With This Art Club, Ouran High School Host Club

Shows -- Dr Who, Supernatural, The Haunting of Hill House, The Haunting of Bly Manor, Agent Carter, DareDevil, Agents of Shield, Jessica Jones, Loki

Movies -- Almost everything Disney, Marvel, DreamWorks, Pixar; also love Harry Potter (please note that I no longer make purchases related to or share/create/interact with content for this series). Soft spots for: Encanto, The Bad Guys, The Ice Age Series, Invader Zim: Enter the Florpus, Coraline, Corpse Bride

Web Comics -- LINKED UNIVERSE LINKED UNIVERSE LINKED UNIVERSE LINKED UNIVERSE, Room of Swords, Lore Olympus, Castle Swimmer, Not Even Bones

Video Games -- Legend of Zelda Series, Harvest Moon: The Tale of Two Towns, Sonic and All-stars Racing Transformed, Mario Kart, Luigi's Mansion

I can promise you there are a LOT I haven't even mentioned, feel free to ask about it!

(Current) Blorbos

FOUR FROM LINKED UNIVERSE. FOUR. FOUR FOUR FOUR FOUR!!!!!! THE BOY. HERO OF THE FOUR SWORD. HERO OF MEN/LIGHT/MINISH/ETC. FOURRRRRRRRRRFHDDJCHDICHKSKSHSO

Mr Wolf (The Bad Guys)

Danny Phantom (Duh)

Loki (MCU)

Zane (Ninjago)

Adrien Agreste (Miraculous Ladybug)

Princess Luna (MLP)

Hades,Persephone (Lore Olympus)

Gyrus (Room of Swords)

Tag List -- TBD

Other Media Platforms -- TBD

[featherfur]

I posted 3,134 times in 2021

237 posts created (8%)

2897 posts reblogged (92%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 12.2 posts.

I added 707 tags in 2021

#the untamed - 166 posts

#mdzs - 155 posts

#jiang cheng - 137 posts

#wei wuxian - 74 posts

#jiang sect - 36 posts

#tgcf - 32 posts

#jin ling - 31 posts

#lan wangji - 30 posts

#danny complains - 25 posts

#tian guan ci fu - 21 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#like yeah they’ll be polite because they won’t shame jc but they’re also going to make it clear they’re no ally and they’ll watch the other

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

HONESTLY Jin Ling being like *eyeroll* “yeah well your personality caused these problems UNCLE” and Jiang Cheng’s only response being *glare* *mutter* is a HIGHLY UNDERRATED INTERACTION. That’s how you know they are so comfortable and familiar with each other! That is the interaction of two people who know each other’s flaws and still love each other! And I love them.

These two heckle each other so much out of love! Jin Ling has absolutely no fear of his Jiujiu except for the one moment he does something really fucking bad and even then he’s just like “but Jiujiu… I’m baby 🥺. Shushu tell him, I’m baby.” And Guangyao says “look at him, he’s baby” and Jiang Cheng goes “…. yes okay, I forgive you. You’re a shit I love you so much” except with an eyeroll and not getting on his case for lying and escaping with a criminal

So many bad takes are about “Jin Ling is actually terrified of Jiang Cheng! He’s abusive and doesn’t love him! Once he keeps seeing Wei Wuxian he’ll realize he doesn’t want anything to do with Jiang Cheng! He doesn’t actually like being around him!”

Like… they’re each other’s favorite person in the world! Jin Ling feels so comfortable with him that he even just blabs that “Not even my Jiujiu has hit me! He just says that!”

Jin Ling starts crying publicly and Jiang Cheng just pulls him close, makes it clear that anyone who says anything will face his wrath. Which is NOT something either of Jiang Cheng’s parents would have allowed, something that Jiang Cheng would be within his right to say ‘Hey, clean yourself up. You’re an heir, wipe your tears.” And what he does instead is go “come here, tell me what’s wrong… you can’t speak? Okay let’s go somewhere private, no one will say anything, no one will hurt you, you’re safe’ with his actions of calling him over and pulling him close to carefully comfort him alone.

Jin Ling openly snarks and talks back to Jiang Cheng and even when Jiang Cheng snaps at him for being a dumbass and running into danger at the temple, Jin Ling still feels immediately safe by his presence and the fact that he actually let Jiang Cheng take care of him after being so horribly betrayed by Jin Guangyao speaks volumes. The only time Jin Ling is actually afraid of Jiang Cheng is after the most traumatizing event of his life involving one of his caretakers being willing to kill him and nearly doing so and Jiang Cheng does what he always does and the moment Jin Ling shows fear, Jiang Cheng backs down and takes him home instead.

I have so many emotions about these two I could write an essay

449 notes • Posted 2021-11-13 22:52:00 GMT

#4

Thinking about little baby toddler Jingyi who never quite manages to stop running once he figures out how to stand and manages to full on tackle Lan Xichen into the ground atleast three separate times and each time Lan Xichen laughs, almost a little too free (because honestly after the war? Such liveliness is a blessing he can’t curb) as he stands himself and the little gremlin up. He grins, just barely skirting that ‘don’t be too joyful’ rule, and reminds Jingyi not to run for his own safety… before sending him after Sizhui and Lan Wangji who are walking past. When Jingyi manages to tackle them both down, Lan Xichen turns away to hide his smile but it still lingers as he looks at the others

Every Lan disciple in the vicinity suddenly forgets about the no staring rule and wonders if they can convince Jingyi to knock him down again to make him laugh again.

512 notes • Posted 2021-09-13 23:12:08 GMT

#3

Do you ever think Wei Wuxian forgets that Jiang Cheng is now 36+ and is absolutely bewildered when Jiang Cheng complains about his back or says his knee aches when it rains because?? Brother is baby?? Brother is baby brother??? He shouldn’t be old?? What??

Jiang Cheng meanwhile is just like “IM NOT FUCKING OLD I JUST WENT THROUGH A WAR AND DON’T HAVE A FRESH BODY YOU FUCK ASS! IM ONLY 36!”

Jin Ling agrees that Jiang Cheng is indeed Old. Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren both try to ‘helpfully’ offer Jiang Cheng some helpful herbs or remedies while Lan Wangji is eternally smug that he has the Cold Pond and gets to avoid it.

Jiang Cheng regrets mentioning his back hurts one fucking time because “I am not old you shits! Put up your sword I can still kick your ass!” But his juniors just keep insisting he shouldn’t strain himself and he can’t tell if they’re just being brats or genuinely think that 30’s are old and either way he’s not having fun.

589 notes • Posted 2021-11-20 22:09:01 GMT

#2

I am Thinking about Nie Huaisang who doesn’t care. Nie Huaisang who honestly doesn’t know if Wei Wuxian is actually evil or not, if he actually became a demon. Nie Huaisang who willingly took a gamble being well aware that Wei Wuxian could come back wrong and twisted and lay death on Jianghu and decided that was fine.

So many thoughts seem to hinge on NHS being almost completely certain that WWX isn’t actually evil, didn’t actually lose his entire soul to demonic cultivation. I’m here for Huaisang who’s spent the last ten years in absolute terror of being killed because he’s not obedient enough, in absolute terror of being found out, in absolute terror of never being able to even just find his brothers body.

Who’s pushed to the brink because of that terror, because of that anger, that heartbreak, that agony. And he decides he doesn’t give a fuck how Wei Wuxian returns.

If he’s still the Wei Wuxian that Nie Huaisang remembers then great! Wonderful! His plan will work perfectly, probably! But if he’s not? If he’s a tormented destroyed soul of resentful energy and absolutely nothing else? If he really is the mass murderer everyone calls him and comes back with that same killing instinct?

Then Nie Huaisang will dump the oil in front of him to lead that fire straight to Koi tower first and accept his fate of being burned with the rest of the world. Because he is Tired, he is Scared, and he is so very very Angry.

One way or another he will burn the world that Jin Guangyao created at the expense of his brother. He will burn it down to the ground with rivers of blood and the flames of war if he has too. He has nothing left, he is not adored by the Nie Sect, his only other friend is a broken man on the other end of Jianghu who spends his time only with his nephew, his second brother doesn’t care to look at Jin Guangyao with anything but affection, and the man who he once lived beside has his hands coated in the blood of Huaisang’s big brother. He has nothing, he has nothing. And he will make sure Jin Guangyao dies with nothing too.

830 notes • Posted 2021-10-02 20:18:08 GMT

#1

Not to say that Jiang Cheng has definitely semi-raised half the disciples of Yunmeng Jiang via Jiujiu energy but Jiang Cheng has semi-raised every disciple more than two years younger than him via Jiujiu energy

He knows every single disciples name, their history, their likes and hates. He can rattle off every punishment they’ve received in the last four years, what he got for their birthday, how many times they’ve fallen in the lake, and how much time they’ve spent going through classes because physical punishment does nothing for these dumbasses.

At any given moment he is thinking about the disciples who were injured, tracking the ones who went out on missions, assigning lookouts for the ones who have taken too long to return home, and planning what he’s going to yell at them for making him worry.

He has been called “shushu” or “jiujiu” by them more times than even he can count, he rages every time but it’s a mark that the cultivator is Officially Jiang and he sighs and turns a blind eye (and occasionally slips funds in for) when they throw a party to ‘welcome’ the poor embarrassed cultivator.

He has kept every item ever given to him by his people, yes even the horrible scribbles passed over by four year olds who don’t even know who he is they just think he’s pretty. His bedroom is just covered in knickknacks and occasionally if he gets one he really likes he will put it purposefully at the end of his table over dinner and it’s an internal fight every time to get something he’ll like enough to show off.

(YES it’s ridiculous, YES it’s childish, but this is still Yunmeng Jiang and these cultivators, these members of the family Jiang Cheng dragged from the ashes of his home and made anew have given him everything they have and more so yes when they’re home they can have their little jokes and their little trinkets and he will let it all happen because it means they’re happy and they’re safe and they know they will always always have their sect leader at their back. When they’re outside they’re standing behind their sect leader, they will never falter. But when they get home? Their sect leader stands behind them and watches over them in all the million tiny ways only a sect leader can so they have their freedom in safety)

870 notes • Posted 2021-08-14 22:18:49 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[arcturus-ish]

I think it's pretty obvious who I'm talking about specifically, but if you're still confused: yes, this is partially about the ProtectAnaFlores blog, but also at anyone who's going after people for not liking Ana Flores (particularly people with CP who have a valid reason not to). I didn't like Ana Flores. While I am disabled, I don't have CP and so I wanted to listen to the input of people who do and since they all spoke about her being ableist I was able to recognize her ableism myself and decide that she wasn't a character I should support. If you don't have CP, you don't really have the authority to say whether someone who was ableist towards a character with CP was actually ableist to them because of it or not- even if you are disabled, because it's different. I will never know what it's like to have CP or how people would treat me because of it- I am physically-abled passing anyway, so I don't experience that kind of ableism much; I will never know what it's like, so I trust people who do when they talk about it because THEY are the only ones who WOULD. "If you don't like Ana Flores you're a misogynist." If you're a cis gay guy- you're not really qualified to lead conversations about misogyny, considering you have never-and will never- experience it; you actually thrive off of it, like any other cis man. Should you be an ally and call it out? Definitely. Do you know more than afab people, who experience it every single day? absolutely not. Not liking Ana does not make me misogynistic, just like liking/defending her does not wholly absolve you of not being misogynistic. If you group afab people who don't identify as women (i.e, nonbinary people) with women in your mind, purely because they're afab and not because it's what they identify as, then you kind of suck. Cis gays have been known to be almost as (if not just as) transphobic as cis straight people and I'm tired of seeing it. While I agree that there are a lot of women in fandom spaces that fetishize mlm relationships (I've been fetishized a LOT for being a trans and queer person- I know how disgusting it is), labelling every single Buddie shipper as "a white woman or afab enby who fetishizes gay men" is... wrong. I'm afab, transmasc and agender, but I label myself loosely as mlm and so being grouped in with women purely because of what I was assigned at birth, and not because of my actual gender identity, when it comes to appreciating mlm relationships feels borderline transphobic. Non-binary people can be gay for men too, and even if they're not, maybe they see themselves in Buck/Eddie and so their relationship means something to them? The other (canon) couples, whether they be straight or queer, mean a lot to me as well- literally every person I follow or have interacted with about 911 loves the other queer/BIPOC representation just as much and more often than not is queer and/or BIPOC themselves. (this is NOT dismissing the fact that A LOT of the 911/Buddie part of the fandom is racist, ableist, misogynistic and has people who fetishize queerness as a whole. I acknowledge that and hate those people just as much as most of us do-same for the cishet people who make spaces like this unsafe for us queer people- but I'm not addressing that right now.) Call people out on their bullshit if it's spreading harm and/or misinformation, absolutely, but don't harass and bully a bunch of people (some of which are literal MINORS) for finding comfort in Buddie when there's no reason to other than they like these two together. You've called me "pathetic and 100% the worst" for doing absolutely nothing before, simply because you caught onto the fact that I enjoy Buddie. Aren't you doing the same exact thing you hate Buddie shippers for? Seems fairly hypocritical, but I guess you're the only person who gets to call people out on that... because you're a gay guy.

[aro-culture-is]

terf spotting part 2

okay, so I figured it’s time to upgrade your terf-spotting toolbox. Pro-tip: apply these to EVERY POST ABOUT FEMINISM and you'll catch 90% of the TERFs on your dashboard

binary language is the biggest red flag. if a post refers to only men/women, you need to check it. seriously. anything that has “men are like...” “while women are...” is so so likely to be a terf.

check the urls. a huge amount of these assholes are obvious. look for words like “rad”, “womyn/wombyn”, “terf”, “female”, anything related to vulva/vagina/etc, and to a lesser degree goddesses, typically named, such as aphrodite or artemis

step one: look at their description.

does it include terf, swerf, radfem, tradfem, gender critical, nonbinary skeptic, or anything like that? at minimum they’re a transphobe. swerfs are very rarely not transphobic but like... do you really think they’re better than terfs? it’s just a slightly different pathway into being a terf usually. also, 2nd wave feminism = feminism minus trans acceptance (this is simplified). if they’re a “2nd wave feminist” they’re transphobic.

if it seems to give off a huge “women are superior” vibe, that’s more suspicious than not. words like misandrist pop up, and it might seem innocent to someone who isn’t used to terf-hunting

lastly, if anything else flags your attention, take note. a lot of “baby radfems” so to speak are exclus or mention “cishet” in the aphobic way.

step two: search their blog

whatever words you think will give you an idea of their attitude, look for that. common: “trans”, “transgender”, “gender”, “radical feminism”, “feminism”, “terf safe”, etc are tags you can check. if tumblr refuses to search for whatever reason, skip to step two and a half

look at the posts with a critical eye. sometimes this is easy - they reblog a transphobic comment that is easy to recognize as such (esp if you are trans. cis people, i’ll list more ways to recognize it), comment it, etc. sometimes, this is harder. does every post not directly imply transphobia, but constantly criticize trans people? hmm. what could that imply? (hint: transphobia) does every post involving a trans person talk down to them, describe them as confused, refer to how sad transitioning is, etc? or maybe there’s a shocking number of posts about detransitioning with some “good” looking sources? (detransitioning is, statistically, almost always because the person in question experienced so much transphobia after beginning to transition that they stopped for their safety. most of these link to a shitty study that labeled non-answers as detransitioned people). be critical of patterns.

step two and a half: searching for transphobia didn’t give a clear answer

if searching didn’t clunk out, look for other bigotry; these people rarely choose one minority to hate. often they tend to want a straight/gay only view of the world, so biphobia, panphobia, queerphobia, aphobia, and such are other avenues to check. search terms relating to those - “bi”, “pansexual”, “queer”, “asexual” - and read them critically. ask yourself what tendencies are shown in these posts.

if searching clunked out: try briefly scrolling through their blog. the easy avenue is that they reblog from a variety of blogs that do have these sorts of things clearly labelled - if every post includes a url that you’d want to check according to step one, it’s safe to assume this is a feminism to terf pipeline blog. 

if nothing continues to jump out, decide where your instincts lie - if you’re wary despite this, don’t reblog a post they’re in! 

step three: do something about it

okay, they’re a bigot. now what?

if there are other people on the post who seem suspicious, and there often are, do this for each. you’ll get good at doing it quick.

you’re gonna take a deep breath with me first. try breathing in for a count of 4 (however fast you want), hold for 4, out for 4, and hold for 4. repeat 4 times. 

you’re gonna send this post to whoever reblogged it via messaging / asks / submit if you can, and tell them what you found. ask if they can delete it, or if you’re a little concerned about the person you’re sending it to, leave it with that. see how they respond. if you’re feeling especially brave, ask them to do the same for the person they reblogged it from. destroy the distribution of the words of a terf at their source.

hopefully they delete it or offer to - if they don’t, ask if you didn’t, and if they refuse, be cautious. don’t assume they’re transphobic or get defensive - explain that this is how transphobes on tumblr recruit. they sneak onto posts about feminism to target new feminists and convince them that trans people are destroying feminism, and that it’s important to give them no platform. if someone consistently gives transphobes a platform to speak on. as a trans person, I will assume that you are not an ally at best and one of them at worst. feel free to quote me on that. 

if they delete it - great! good job :) offer resources like this post if they seem friendly and genuinely interested in no-platforming transphobes

if they don’t - okay. you’ve got a decision here. check their blog from step one first, and unfollow and block them if needed. if it seems like this is the only type of suspicious post, go with your instinct. unfollow for your health, send it directly to whoever they reblogged it from and see if you can bridge that gap, or a bunch of other options. do what you think is best, but NEVER send threats, never send messages from a place of anger, and never interact with someone who drains you on tumblr. 

This is a basic formula I follow, and it works pretty damn well. If you have the Shinigami eyes extension for chrome or firefox, right click on the bigoted post where their username is, or on their title if the description speaks for itself, and mark them as transphobic. exercise caution - if you are a minor, don’t interact with blogs you aren’t comfortable interacting with especially. 

and remember: posts about feminism are where they hide. feminism =/= good if it’s transphobic garbage masquerading as feminism now. 

if you are someone who used to be in some way transphobic or otherwise bigoted, please double check your blog for those posts, delete them, and post that you did so because you no longer agree with those views. 

[all-things-are-nothing-to-me]

An Obituary for Identity Politics

I began writing this text about a couple months before the uprising in response to George Floyd’s death. The uprising, which now has become a global event, has motivated me to share my perspective in this text. My experiences in Minneapolis from the 26th through the 31st of May have furthered my contempt for identity politics and so I have included additional critiques of it based on those experiences.

Rewind back to a time and place where people used pagers and pay phones. When front porches and public parks were the hang-out spots. A time when conflicts were resolved face-to-face and shit-talking came with real life consequences. These were the days before ‘call-out culture’, ‘troll-baiting’, and other internet-dominated social activities. Some say the internet and technological expansion have advanced the fight against oppression. My opinion? The internet is where all potential for social revolt goes to die. In addition to pointless petitions and endless memes, recognition as a rebel can be gained through pity parties and academic loyalty rather than hands-on direct action. While providing an excellent breeding ground for keyboard warriors and pretentious academics, the internet also allows for the stunted development of social skills necessary in navigating face-to-face communication. Conflict resolution takes the form of indefinite internet drama and at most an awkward in-real-life re-construction of judge, jury, and executioner. Face-to-face interaction is almost unnecessary in the techno-society where phones have become a personalized commodity seemingly fused to one’s hand. From a screen with adjustable dimming, a full spectrum of emotional expression can now be digitally represented from a cache of emoticons.

The internet is also a place where the lynch-mob mentality of “call-out culture” encourages people to view one another as one-dimensional beings – only defined by mistakes and imperfections. In the name of ‘social justice’ and ‘outing abusers’, a new statism emerges, utilizing fear and guilt to coerce allyship conformity. And similar to being charged by the State, once condemned on the internet, an individual may never escape that reputation. Instead, any or all personal growth and development remains trivial to the static nature of their past mistakes. Despite personal improvement, a convicted individual is sentenced to forever remain captive by the essence of their online portrayal.

In my experience as a ‘marginalized voice’ I’ve seen identity politics used by activists as a tool of social control aimed at anyone who fits the identity criteria of ‘oppressor’. The traditional power-struggle for equality has turned into an olympic sport for social leverage, inverting the same social hierarchy that should have been destroyed in the first place. Many identity politicians I’ve come across are more interested in exploiting “white guilt” for personal (and even capital) gain than physically confronting any organizational model of white supremacy. I’ve witnessed victimhood used to conceal blatant lies and bullying, motivated by personal revenge. All too often I have seen how identity politics creates a culture where personal experiences are trivialized to the point of passive silence. But this is all old news. Any experienced, self-identifying anarchist has seen or probably experienced some form of being ‘called-out’ or ‘cancelled’. So why do I bring it up? Because I still see this shit happening and I still see so many people lacking the courage to openly confront it.

I don’t expect this text to bring identity politics to a grinding halt. I am merely expressing my hostility for it and its authoritarian, anti-individualist nature. I still see self-proclaimed anarchists fussin’ over ‘white’ dreads (as well as seeing people cut their dreads under social pressure). I still see people justify voting like they did for Obama (this time it’s for Bernie). And I still see ‘allies’ mumbling frustration under their breath, too scared to confront the authoritarianism they see right in front of ‘em.

How many ‘white’ anarchists were called racist (or privileged) and shamed for refusing to vote this past 2020 election?

Imagine what anarchy would look like if people refused to obey the condescending demands of identity politicians. Would people feel more free to explore their lives beyond the narrow limitations of prescribed identity? Would they fearlessly reclaim their power to formulate their own opinions? Is there a joy to be experienced in the hysterical mockery of academic elitism?

Would this text be less valid if it wasn’t written by a queer person of color? What if I was a ‘white’, ‘cis’ ‘male’? Why would it matter?

In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t. Because after all, this isn’t just about identity. This is about anti-authoritarian anarchy. If there is one thing I have seen the most in the past few years, it’s how identity politics moves like a plague, consuming every social space — ironically including anarchist circles. For me, anarchy is about destroying socially assigned identity and all the limitations it imposes upon the imagination. Anarchy is an individualist experience that finds itself held captive by the prison of assigned identity. Rather than destroying that prison along with the society that constructs it, anarchism today has become a cemetery of dead potential, internalized victimhood, and an ideological competition for who is ‘most oppressed’.

Rather than taking aim at identity itself and the apparatus maintaining this paradigm, energy is spent tearing one another down, ignoring the complexity of individual uniqueness, and playing the State’s role of defining each other based on membership to identity categories. Embracing a particular identity only reaffirms that identity’s existence as a ‘universal ‘truth’ – and therefore, by the colonial intentions of assigned identity, the servitude and enslavement of some to others as a universal truth as well.

I refuse to participate in upholding enslavement as a condition of my existence, and therefore these ‘truths’ are nothing more than political works of fiction. They are the products of a well-perfected, socially engineered god-complex that enters the mind like parasitic cordyceps, demanding unquestionable obedience. The atom of mental manipulation is a mind institutionalized by the incarceration of industrial society. Identity politics are the antiquated chains of colonization, polished by those who assign personal value to them. These ‘truths’ are the social constructs of control, keeping the life of rebellion shackled in a cold well of reform. And while many have become comfortable there, I have broken out to explore the infinite unknown terrain of hedonism and anti-political anarchy. ‘Black’, ‘Brown’, or ‘White’ power is the antithesis of freedom; it is the ideological charity work of a civilized, humanist form of rebellion. Identity politics is the sterilization of individuality, rendering it both obedient to the collectivist authority of identity and gullible to the nationalist myth of supremacy.

Ultimately, the ‘human’ is an animal domesticated with labels socially constructed to correspond to a hierarchy of economic status. And though this hierarchy has changed over the years, it is constantly held in place by a relationship of those who make demands and those who obey. No matter how the categories are arranged, the hierarchy represents authoritarianism; the group dominating the individual. What defines a ‘human’ is the degree of obedience and commitment to civilized roles and behaviors required by industrial society. The less cooperative a ‘human’ is, the more likely that ‘human’ will be compared to an animal. The animal is the undesireable being – even for the identity politicians who prefer to adopt the colonizers’ ideological anthropocentrism. Perhaps this explains why there is such little discussion on animal liberation in leftist-anarchist writing. The marginalized voice is more concerned with being portrayed as equal to the civilized colonizer than with the lost connection between their animality and the earth. At the core of leftist politics is the humanist aim for social equality within industrial progress — all while the earth continues to be cut up into nation-states and ravaged for anthropocentric exploitation and expansion.

It is my opinion that as long as one maintains a personal relationship with the ‘human’ identity, similar to ‘white’ or ‘male’ identities, the individual will only continue to reinforce the colonial paradigm of civilized vs savage. And as long as this reinforcement continues, the individual also remains vulnerable to imprisonment within other identity constructs that further suppress feral potential.

I wonder when or if anarchists in general will move beyond the group-mentality of leftism toward individualist insurgency — recognizing confrontation with identity as an act of personal emancipation. Will anarchists one day come to realize that anyone or anything above the individual represents an authority figure – whether it be “The Commune”, the “Movement”, or the cultural governance of identity? Maybe some, but I am sure not all.

The Victimhood Saint

After a 45 minute drive we finally arrive. It’s been a long day of retail theft and this is the last stop. It’s my turn and I plan to walk out with at least $500+ worth of merchandise for online resell. But I’m already gettin’ a bad feeling from this place. Unlike the other locations, this store is much smaller which to me means Loss Prevention will have a visual advantage watching the doors. Bigger places mean the enter and exit doors are spread further apart. In addition, the bigger the store, the more difficult it is to keep track of every shopper through the cameras. I decide to go for it anyways. Never know anything for sure until ya try.

I walk in, grab a cart and begin searching for the specific items I plan to take. I also scan the check out lanes and customer service desk. Two customer service employees busy chatting, check out lanes all blocked off except the one near the entrance and two near the exit. The entrance lane has a worker wiping down carts. One exit lane has a cashier, the lane next to it is totally empty. I take note of it as looking “too easy”, but I decide to refocus on where my items are located in the store. After loading my cart I start my journey to the exit. For anyone who shoplifts for a living, they know this is the exciting part. Every moment up to this point I’ve been just a regular shopper. But now, as I walk toward the exit, I begin to shed the costume of “shopper” and prepare for the criminal experience of “shoplifter”. As my heart starts to pound I feel my nerves initiate a well — developed calming response where I temporarily disassociate from the panic in order to keep my senses sharp and focused. I have to be ready for anything. And I still have to maintain my “regular shopper” face and body language. As I pass through the “too easy” lane everything looks good.

Customer service people are still chatting not paying attention, the one cashier is too busy ringing up someone to notice. I pull out my fake receipt and casually make my way through the first set of exit doors. If I was seen or caught, this is about the moment I would hear someone approach me from behind or feel someone grab my shoulder. Out the second set of doors, all is good. Time to start making my way toward the back of the parking lot – and then it happened...

Anyone who has ever shoplifted long enough knows these dreaded words: “Sir... Sir!”. I hear someone behind me yell out. I pretend to not hear it. Then I hear quick footsteps approach from behind. “Sir, I need to see your receipt” he says as he flashes me his Loss Prevention badge. Fuck. Where did this clean-cut lookin’ hipster see me? Must have been in the clothes area behind me... maybe that lane was a fucking trap? Doesn’t matter. Let go of the cart and walk away. I start to walk away and I hear “No no...sir we have to go back inside and fill out paperwork. Don’t worry you will not be arrested”. Yeah, fill out paperwork with all my information, have my picture taken for their records – fuck that. I continue walking away. Another LP runs out and is on the phone. This guy is on the phone with the police. I instantly realize the first guy was secretly stalling me till the police got there! I break out in full run. I hear them both running close behind me. I cross the street and bolt into a trailer park, zig zag between trailer homes and finally hide out in a steel shed. I force my paniced breathing to quiet deep breaths. I calm down and listen to them searching for me nearby.

Finally after not hearing them anymore I text my accomplices a rough idea of where I am. I come out of the shed, trying to tidy up a couple things that fell inside from when I stormed in there. The cops will be here any second. I see my accomplices car slowly drive by and wave em down. I jump in and lay down and we drive off.

I should have trusted my instinct. This was a bad run. But it could have been worse. Instead of being in jail tonight, I am comfortably here writing this text. But this is the reality of shoplifting – or any crime for that matter. No matter how many times you get away with it, it is important to expect to get caught one day. Be ready for it. And when it happens, study the panic, the emotions, the physical responses... know it all well. So the next time you engage in criminal activity, you have a better understanding of the worst case scenario. For me, this is elementary, and there is no place for victimhood or or an outcry of innocence.

While Covid-19 created the conditions for state repression in the form of “stay-at-home” orders, ironically my opportunity for illegalist fun has expanded! Many businesses are left unattended for weeks at a time, meaning property damage goes longer without being reported. In the midst of the panic, supermarket Loss Prevention and security personnel are focused on the number of items people purchase in each cart without realizing the cartloads of food quietly slipping out the other door.

Before shutting down, many stores like REI, L.L Bean and other places would deactivate their security towers. I am guessing this was due to the high volume of people passing through with purchased merch with hidden tags still attached. Probably to avoid the annoyance of the alarm going off every few seconds, the towers were turned off, leaving open a grand opportunity to simply walk out with security tagged items hassle-free.

The past few weeks got me revisiting old memories of when my understanding of anarchy was that of an activity that only lasted as long as a may day march, a demonstration, or night-time fun. I remember feeling like anarchy was the moment I wore black pants, shoes, gloves and a t-shirt around my face. After these activities it was back to the “real world”. Back to wage-slavery, back to the daily routine of paying rent and penny-pinching my food stamps for groceries. Sure, there was the occasional clandestine activity along with tabling zines at punk shows or radical events. But there was this divide that always created a separation, always treating anarchy like an extra-curricular activity. Sure, my life was committed to rebellion; the very concept of a zine distro before I named it “Warzone Distro” was conceived while wasting company time on the shitter. Despite wage-slaving, my mind was always fixated on understanding how to cut corners and work the least for the most amount of money. I was the worker who handed my extra hours over to others. Half-day at work due to light truck load? Hell yeah, I’m out!

Over time, anarchy as mere extra-curricular activity just wasn’t enough. And what I mean by that is I became less and less tolerable of bosses, wage-slaving, alarm clocks, paying rent, and penny-pinching. I remembered what it was like being a kid and not having to conform to such obligations. I remembered adventuring all day outside from early morning to late at night. Everyday was a new adventure, and everyday I was learning something new about myself. Then, as a responsible adult I was learning something new about myself. I hated adultism, adulting, and the performative role and identity of “adult”. But I wasn’t tryin’ to become a child again. Those days have come and gone. I began to wonder what an anarchist life that transcended the adult/child binary could look like.

Fast forward years later here I am, jobless but no longer penny-pinching, and older but more youthful than I have ever been. Some say I am the worst of all worlds; hedonistic, violent, and childish. Of course, what these words mean and how they are applied to me is subjective to interpretation, but one thing is for certain; I feel far more free than I have ever felt and experienced. And I have a love affair with crime. It is an intimate experience — committing crime with a furious contempt for society and the law. Causing disruption and getting away with it compliments my desires for anarchy moment by moment. Nowadays I adventure all day outside from early morning to late at night. And with every criminal activity I am learning more and more about myself. In addition to accepting the fact that my days of joy-riding the fuck out of life will either end in prison or sudden death, I am learning to appreciate the present more than the past or future.

One thing about crime that I have come to realize is a uniqueness that comes with breaking the law, a sense of individual ability, inability, strengths and weaknesses. All are discovered within the experience of breaking the law. And it is this experience that I intend to expand in order to discover more about myself, becoming ungovernable in an anti-social sense.

I reflect back on my past self imprisoned by the cult of identity-politics. I remember how one reason to glorify victimhood was to gain social attention and portray the (marginalized) identities assigned to me in a positive light. “Look at me! A responsible queer person of color holding down a job as a law-abiding citizen!”. But why? So I could prove how similar I was to all those ‘white’ hard-working class heroes that America needs to uphold its colonial establishment? Another wage-slave to passively, willfully accept the conditions of my enslavement? To become another christian of color pretending there is an imaginary kingdom above for all us hoodlums that just never got a fair chance in life? Fuck all that.

The reasons for white supremacists, homophobes, patriarchs, and patriots to fear people like me is beyond identity politics; I am a sworn enemy of their control and order. The societal castle they seek to build and maintain will always be the target of my sabotage!

I think most people can see and understand that embracing socially assigned identities is not necessary for understanding how society utilizes them as tools for social control. I think it is equally as easy to see how identity as a tool of revolution is limited and in fact has led to internal conflict within many revolutionary projects. But what blows my mind is the fact that for so many, these identities were not immediately rejected as a primal, personal form of rebellion. But to be fair I think it is safe to say that these identities maintained the power they do because they are so frequently used by leftist organizations for moral persuasion. Through victimhood and innocence, identity politics is used as an appeal-to-all method of creating group-think that ultimately encourages an individual to surrender independent thinking to a god-complex of morality and collectivism. I think this also plays a pretty big role in statism and the rejection of illegalist revolt.

I reject the statist, civilized binary of guilt and innocence, and therefore also reject the internalization of victimhood. I have no use for “call-out culture” or an internet lynch-mob against my enemies. On the internet, attempts to gain public support against one enemy only informs and empowers another enemy (the state) to confiscate my responsibility. And guilt and innocence is a legalistic binary that only serves to judge and divide based on moral determination. I despise the State, all its social manifestations, and it’s enforcement of repression against chaos. Therefore I am not a victim; I am a self-declared enemy in a war against it. I don’t expect pity, a pardon or charity from it, nor from its defenders.

It was the day Chicago issued its Stay-At-Home order. My partner-in-crime and I were in my home town visiting my mom. While driving home from getting my mom some groceries I notice someone sitting on a park bench alone. “Big Momma” is her name. I was surprised to see her outside in the cold and not indoors at one of the local shelters. Come to find out the shelters had closed their doors probably related to Covid-19. I started to wonder how many others were outside in the cold...

My partner and I head over to a park that I used to do Food Not Bombs at and to my surprise there are about 20 people set up camp outside a building’s air vent blowing out warm air. We walk over and ask how everyone is doing. Some people, after recognizing me from activist projects years ago, excitedly run over to greet me. They are all the unlucky ones locked out of the shelters at least for that weekend. My partner and I get back in the car and come up with a plan.

A half hour later we are at another grocery store. Unlike other times, getting out of this one with free food is going to be a little difficult. The set-up has changed due to heightened security at the door due to Covid-19 and the fear of looting. But it is still possible to get out with a full cart. We load the bottom of the cart with bottled water, multiple loaves of bread, peanut butter, jelly, over 20 bags of mixed dried fruit, fresh apples and bananas. Were ready. We make our way to the door with me leading. My role is to peer around the corner at two self-check out clerks to make sure they aren’t looking. If they are, I will pull out my phone like I am making a phone call. If not, I keep walking forward. My partner and the cart close behind, the coast is clear. First set of doors... second set of doors... all good. Finally get to the car and unload into the trunk. Success! Next stop is another grocery store, but we won’t be getting food at this one: we’re raiding the men’s and women’s bathrooms for huge rolls of toilet paper. The dispensers can be a little loud opening sometimes, but relatively easy to do with any kind of house key. Two backpacks filled with about three huge rolls each, we are all set.

Back at my moms we clean our hands thoroughly before making bags and bags of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Once we finish with that were off back to the homeless encampment. Every person gets two sandwiches, two apples, two bananas, some dried fruit and a bottle of water. In addition we wrap the toilet paper rolls in the grocery bags to keep dry and pass them out. We stick around for a bit and exchange laughs and talk shit on the cops. It was good to make new friends and catch up with old friends. It was good to see they were all maintaining and in high spirits despite the circumstances of the weather and the shelter closures. We left and decided to check other parks for people. Found a few lone wolves who happily took what we had left of the water and sandwiches. We arrive back at my mom’s house and settle in for the night. I open the fridge and giggle while scanning over all the stolen vegan food contemplating what to have for dinner.

The Allyship Coward

In my opinion, the concept of “Allyship” started with good intentions, but like other aspects of identity politics became sour and ready for immediate disposal. Here is how I feel about “Allyship”: If you need a politicized buzzword and concept to motivate you to build bonds with people across gendered or racial categories, your “solidarity” is disingenuous. If your style of communicating is loaded with talking points pre-approved by some Woke Ally 101 workshop, you have become a free-range puppet. Genuine mutual aid or solidarity doesn’t require trendy twitter phrases to motivate bond building. In other words, don’t work with me only because that’s what you read is the “right” thing to do, or because your progressive college professor told you to. Don’t kiss my ass and follow me because I am a victimized, ‘marginalized’ or ‘poc voice’. Or because your friends or comrades will guilt you. Don’t let something as fake as socially constructed categories define our relationship. Work with me only if you personally enjoy our interaction, my personality and most importantly you want to out of individual desire. I don’t believe in coercive mutual aid: it makes a fool out of two people at once.

There are also those who assume they know how other people think based on racial and gendered assumptions. These are the identity politicians who act as both police and representatives of others, coercing allyship through guilt and shaming campaigns. Using their identity, they declare themselves beyond reproach while utilizing a passive-aggressive method of communication for intimidation. But in my opinion, nobody is obligated to support or listen to them, or any one, especially based on something as flat as identity. I am always weary of those who talk as if they represent the interests of people they have never met. It is foolish to think that just because people are socially assigned similar identities that every individual subscribes to the stereotypes of those identities.

Identity politics has successfully offered an understanding of how civilized society works, but as a solution to tearing it all down only leads to boundary policing identities, nationalism, internalized victimhood, and more stereotypes for people to find themselves fighting against.

Wanna know someone’s experience? Interact with them directly. Don’t make assumptions based on social constructions. Wanna show solidarity with people? Treat them as individuals with unique experiences and histories, not as mere drone members of homogenized groupings. And to those who still obey without questioning, another word for white ally is still coward!

The Woke Leadership

Personally, I don’t like to use the word “educate” to describe the communication of ideas between two individuals. “Educate” implies the instillation of universal “truths” rather than the horizontal exchange of personal perspectives. The context of which I see this word “Educate” used the most reinforces a social hierarchy between those who are “woke” and those who are not. Do people actually learn anything when the communication of ideas is asserted in a top-down manner? Maybe. But I prefer not to entertain that hierarchy.

Individual people are more than just ‘white’, ‘brown’ or ‘black’, ‘male’ or ‘female’, or whatever social construction assigned to them at birth. Therefore, communicating with identity-based assumptions will almost always come off as condescending. I see shit like “educate your friends”, or “get educated”, as if to direct toward a Church of Social Justice in order to be “awakened”. And apparently the capitalist mentality of further monetizing information is acceptable without question. Some think the ‘labor’ of answering questions merits a wage, citing something as voluminous as a Google search if one is unable to pay. Ironically, many questions come in good-faith, and are from well-intending activists who endure being talked down to in the first place. In my opinion, this elitist way of responding to well-intending people discourages their empowerment by trivializing their personal histories and guilting them into accepting others as paramount. There is a collectivism to this method of “educating” which creates the foundation of another social system of coercion. I have no interest in contributing to the materializing of that. I can offer a critical view or counter a point without socially stratifying the exchange.

I consider each and every individual mind a rushing, wild waterway of ideas that spill out when the dam of social subordination breaks down. Society collectively discourages any wildness, domesticating the individual and ultimately creating a caged animal within the mind. Beneath all the social conditioning there is a unique individual that discovers itself in chaotic contradiction with society.

Uniformity is the enemy of free expression. There is no “education”, only popular opinion enforced by those who intend to think for others. I think ideas and perspectives can be exchanged in a way that doesn’t resemble an authoritarian model of top-down communication. I’m not an educator and I seek to educate no one. Rather, as they grow and develop, I share my personal experiences and ideas with the world with the understanding that others will differ and have unique experiences of their own.

For example one thing that I have come to realize is that the illegalist life isn’t for everyone. I have seen some people do it for a while and ultimately break under the weight of the very real stress of criminal activity. So when I write these words about criminality – and my contempt for identity politics – I speak only for myself. When I began writing “Descending into Madness”, it was the same night I had walked out of a Seattle REI with two packs worth over $300 each. The security tower alarms never went off as I walked right out with two rope-style security tags attached. Prior to walking out I joked with myself that my criminal affairs indicated that I was descending into madness because attempting this was fucking crazy. And then I was successful. And I realized on the car ride home that if it wasn’t for entertaining such courageous insanity I might not have never known that some of these stores have non-operational security towers.

In my opinion, the “Woke Leadership” of leftism leads anarchism over a cliff into a downward accelerating disintegration. Paralyzed by the fear and shame enforced by a new order, some anarchists will never make it to self-emancipation, or independent thinking as a rejection of group-think authority. It is by a narrow, liberal definition of anti-oppression that many individuals define themselves as anarchists – a type of definition that limits anti-oppression to the moralist, humanist confines of civilized society. It is not a coincidence that most anti-oppression praxis requires a statist apparatus to enforce laws that accommodate equal rights. And while there’s nothing wrong with people having equal rights under capitalism, that victory celebrates the power of statist reform rather than anti-authoritarian attack. And in front of this statist power are the “community leaders” or those who have no interest in critiquing authority. Instead, they have built their socio-political careers on petty reforms in the name of “the community” and scold radicals – calling them “outside agitators”. And following behind these leaders are ‘white’ anarchist allies, confused and frustrated, trying to decide between being called a racist for setting shit on fire or a good ally for kissing a ‘black’ preacher’s ass.

“What you or I may or may not consider ‘tactical’ isn’t really relevant. This is less a war in the traditional sense and more a storm -uncontrollable and chaotic. This is one of the problems with the left’s characterization of ‘the movement’ as something uniform, monolithic, and ideologically consistent. It isn’t. It won’t be. ‘The movement’ consists of a million individuals with their own individual views and opinions and actions, and it does no one any good to deride anyone who isn’t doing things exactly the way you see fit.” Baba Yaga

Another Word For “Black Leadership” is Authoritarianism

After marching, we arrive at the 3rd Precinct at East Lake St and Minnehaha Ave. BLM organizers begin howling into the megaphone about demands, with a few prayers and droning chants mixed in. I notice someone slowly creeping up behind me who starts bangin’ his fist on the window. Concerned it will break, three bystanders begin quietly shaming him “this ain’t the place for that, keep it peaceful!”. The person responds back quietly but with angry tension in his voice “that’s the fuckin’ problem, y’all muthafuckas never wanna do shit except march and chant...”. Discouraged, he starts to walk away. “I’m with you on that shit fo real tho” I tell him. “That’s what’s up – fuck all this other shit” he responds while walking away. A minute or so later, I lose my patience for listening to BLM talk about being peaceful and decide to go look for that same individual again. I round the corner to the back of the police station and notice a commotion. A group of about 5–7 ‘black’ folks are blocking the back glass doors of the police station, arguing with a group of about 20 ‘black’ and ‘brown’ angry youth – including the one from earlier. Unable to contain my own frustration I get caught up arguing with the police-defenders as well. Finally, in the middle of the shouting a couple of ‘black’ and ‘brown’ youth begin spray painting “fuck 12” near the commotion. Cheers behind me erupt from a crowd that has now tripled in size. A brawl breaks out near the doors, and then a single rock smashes through the precinct window and is immediately followed by a hail storm of rocks, street cones, water bottles, and anything else within reach. The group of 5–7 ‘black’ pacifists cry out in desperation to stop the destruction, going as far as attempting to physically detain people, but ultimately are overwhelmed. They try to collect the rocks after being thrown and find themselves in multiple physical confrontations while doing so. People from the front of the building run over and join in on the vandalism. Eventually after every window is smashed the crowd moves toward the police parking lot and begin damaging police cars. I finally pause to catch a breath when I hear a stun grenade go off. The police run out from another door and begin shooting rubber bullets and tear gas. The crowd disperses but with hysterical laughs of joy and accomplishment. The 3rd Precinct is in ruins — and little did I know this was all just the beginning.

The very next day a bigger crowd of mostly ‘black’ and ‘brown’ youth showed up and continued to wage war on the 3rd Precinct. By night, a three mile radius was liberated from police control by the people on those streets. The 3rd Precinct was breached and taken over. Police abandoned the area all together. Their building was looted and cop cars driven into the street and set on fire. A Target across the parking lot was broken into and looted along with other stores nearby. People celebrated the victory by shooting off their guns in the air. Strangers sang and danced around burned out cop cars, exchanged high-fives in passing, and shared looted food. People casually socialized in front of burning buildings while others threw rocks through the remains of store front windows for target practice.

While it might have seemed like a perfect utopia, it wasn’t divorced from reality. Fights broke out between small factions of people and long-awaited personal conflicts were solved in the now cop-free streets. Business owners shot and killed looters and low-income housing units burned to the ground. But this is the difference between the textbook, sugar-coated ideologies of politics and raw, unmediated rage. The revolt didn’t happen due to any teachings of Mao or religious messages from a god. The fires, looting, and attacks against police didn’t need Marxism, a transcript of The Coming Insurrection, or an academic course on the history of anarchism. All that was needed was the chaotic expression of rage against representations of authority.

As expected, many people on the internet – including many self-proclaimed anarchists — passed judgement on the situation – most often coming from an ideological position that placed value in uniformity and a narrowed range of “acceptable” forms of revolt. In my experience, uprisings like this flourish best when least controlled or organized. The more that expressions of anger are controlled and organized the less anarchistic they become — essentially becoming pacified to accommodate a particular political vision. For me that is undesirable and also unrealistic. Destruction is destruction, violence will be violence, and to expect an uprising to be anything less is naive at best. While some can sit on the sidelines and moralize specific tactics or forms of emotional expression, they disregard the reality that full-fledged warfare has no inherent morality. Businesses that were boarded up and declared “black owned” weren’t spared by any moral consideration; they too were broken into, looted, and subsequently burned to the ground.

Also, in my opinion, the more uncontrollable and unmanageable an uprising remains, the less likely the police will have the ability to adapt to its formation and dominate it. The police had the least control over hundreds of individuals rebelling in such a chaotic manner as to overwhelm them and send them fleeing.

Over the next few days, attacks against the 5th Precinct happened while liberals, pacifists, and identity politicians quietly crawled back to avenge their loss and inability to control the first riot. The internet became their ground zero for one of the worst campaigns of lies and fear mongering I have personally ever seen.

As the victories of burning cop cars and police stations circulated online from all over the states, liberals rushed to the scenes in a desperate authoritarian attempt to assert their ideological morality and political program. They insist on a narrative that labels anyone who engages in sabotage as a “white supremacist” or “undercover cop” “infiltrating” the uprising.

Many of these liberals are the same ‘black’ people who failed to stop ‘black’ and ‘brown’ rebels from looting and destroying property. They failed to convince all ‘white’ people to evacuate the riots (because even some ‘white’ people knew not all ‘black’ or ‘brown’ people have a problem with them being there – recognizing their value as accomplices). And in an effort to preserve capitalist, reformist values, liberals of all races sought to halt the looting and vandalism by bombarding social media with blatantly false information. This false information is riddled with catch phrases like “outside agitators” and “white supremacists” in order to emotionally motivate readers to chose a side within a false dichotomy. And those who are not physically on the streets or there with rebels battling police are the target audience of these narrowed, inaccurate representations of reality.

Different ideological motives create different interpretations of events. And since liberals and pacifists tend to dominate social media more than those who are too busy out in the streets, they have an advantage. And since liberals morally frame all people of color as obedient, victimist heroes, most people have difficulty admitting that people of color are capable of destroying property and participating in violent forms of protest. This also plays into the compulsion to blame ‘white’ people for forms of rebellion considered morally undesirable. Riots/uprisings are not all utopian and pretty. They are the dangerous elements of liberation that occur when all other options have failed. Whether people are afraid of violence or not won’t change the fact that police kill, and will continue to kill as long as the concept of law enforcement exists. In my opinion there is no “bettering” the police, and there is no “justice” when someone is already being buried six feet deep.

And the police are not all ‘white’. ‘Black’ cops kill ‘black’ people too.

The worst part about the online interpretation of events is that the people spreading this misinformation fail to communicate to the online-world the joy, smiles, singing and dancing of racially diverse rebels as they celebrated the destruction of the 3rd Precinct.

I mean shit, imagine being a person of color, harassed by police all your life, and then a day and night comes when you actually get to see a police station burning, and police completely abandoning the area. All this is erased from history when liberals credit it all to a group of people — white supremacists — who didn’t exist in those battles in the first place.

To this day as I write this, there are still people spreading conspiracy theories on the internet like the famous “brick bait” video of cops unloading bricks (behind their own building – not in an alley as originally propagated). While I can’t say for absolute certainty that there were no white supremacists at the events at all (I mean I saw some driving past in pickup trucks yellin’ white power shit, and the ‘brown’ dude who rolled up in a truck rockin’ pro-police slogans and a confederate flag) I sure as hell didn’t see any in the battles. I have seen pictures of ‘black’ people locking arms to protect riot police, white allies turning other ‘white’ people over to the police in the name of ‘black’ support, and ultimately police regaining control and using these pacifying efforts to brutalize peaceful protesters.

Feral Delinquency

It is my opinion that the last months expose weaknesses of civilization in very obvious ways. Governmental control had increased as a panic response to social tension and spontaneous ruptures of illegal activity. Covid-19 broke the order of daily productivity and civilized slavery, leaving people more time to contemplate their lives and the value of their free time outside of working. The uprisings in response to the murder of George Floyd demonstrated the weaknesses of the police power and control – even at their own home base. At this point I have no earthly idea what will come next.

I admit to finding it fascinating to see non-human animals and the earth flourish in the midst of our industrial despair. To see clearer skies, various animals walking the streets, flooding that loosens the foundation of this concrete jungle. I can’t help but feel both the pandemic and these continued ruptures against authority are better than a return to normality; a normality where death from industrial civilization and the State is as routine as a slaughterhouse in full operation.

I wonder what kinda conversations people are having with each other or with themselves during this blooming destabilization of domesticated order. Will more and more people seize this opportunity to express anger and frustration through random acts of violence and sabotage against one another? Against law enforcement? Against the institutions that have become weaker due to financial loss and now stand more vulnerable than ever? I can only hope the uprisings continue in some capacity – above or below ground which is personally more favorable for me at this point.

Will people beg for the return of the old daily misery of monotony, or will they explore the depths of permanent uncertainty? Return to work or rewild? I guess only time will tell.

But here, I can only speak for myself. My anarchy is my own, as are my thoughts and words in this text. I don’t write to impress any club of internet anarchists who flex intellectual texts for self-congratulatory praise. I make my diary public in an antagonistic effort to mock the victimist, anti-individualist narrative of leftism which currently dominates contemporary anarchism.

I don’t wish for a return to normality and the daily misery of industrial production. I have no desire to celebrate ridiculous “victories” such as police accountability, firings, or prison terms – which will only be followed by the rebuilding of their ruined precincts or perhaps an equally authoritarian “community-based” replacement. I desire nothing less than the total abolition of all governance and policing. And perhaps those who hold some form of elitist power will find me undesirable and will orchestrate a smear campaign against me, banning my writing and “cancel” me from their Movement. But little would they know that the days and nights, between wide fields and the stars, and between the tree tops and the ground – is the domain of my adventure! And with it is a joy that follows anarchy as a vibrant life experience rather than a measure of social capital online, or a theory frozen in an academic journal.

The internet has created a culture of desperation for social continuity and digital validation. It is the breeding ground for “new” concepts of anarchism that are nothing more than communist corpses with hipster aesthetic. Anti-civ anarchy, impregnated by leftism now displays the extent of its power with endless twitter debates on “eco-fascism”. Twitter — a place where reclaiming one’s life and body is shamed by the disciples of privilege politics – is a graveyard of voices glorifying their own death-by-internet.

My animalism looks nothing like adopting the imagery and behaviors of existing animals. Instead it is the silhouette of an illegalist, feral menace dancing around the burning prison of domestication. My abandonment of victionhood is a foreclosure on both the pity politics of morality-based organizing and the sainthood of innocence. My anarchy is an obituary for identity politics. It is a personal insurgency without a future, a dream without the anaesthesia of hope, a declaration of joy with the lifespan of an exploding bomb.

This text is dedicated to all those rebels whose only negotiation with authority is fire and destruction...I am forever inspired by your courageous wrath across racial and gendered lines... To the youth who made history on May 26th, to the rebels who perished, and to those currently held captive for their part in this war against the state. RIP George Floyd

[himbo-the-clown]

Hm. Slowly coming to the realisation that it’s infinitely easier as a Jewish person to talk about my opinions on Judaism than it is to talk about any other experiences I have as a member of any other minority group I’m part of. And I think it’s because every other minority I’m part of is majority christians or people raised in christian society (which is really every society that isn’t explicitly non-christian). So while other Jewish people can see the things I say about Judaism and wholeheartedly disagree with them, they don’t take it as me being a Bad Jew or an Evil Person because they understand that there’s no one way to be right and that there’s a lot of nuance and subjectivity in the world.

Whereas people who are christian or were raised in christian society often feel like if people don’t agree with them then those people are somehow inherently incorrect. Which is how we get people who try their best to be allies being “called out” for not listening to members of a group..... despite people being physically incapable of listening to and agreeing with Every Single Member of a group. Like individuals think that if the person listened to every side of an issue and then didn’t agree with them personally, they didn’t listen at all. And that they’re intentionally being bigoted and malicious.

Whereas with Jews there’s the whole “two Jews, three opinions” thing where even if one of us disagrees with another, we also know that there’s more than one way to look at things that can be equally valid and correct (as well as equally invalid and incorrect at the same time). Because our culture is heavily based around the idea of looking at every side of an issue and never coming to just one “true” answer, it’s much easier to disagree with someone without feeling like they must be wrong to make you right.

Christianity is so deeply rooted in all cultures that aren’t explicitly something else, and it convinces people that there’s right and wrong, good and bad, no such thing as nuance. That two people cannot hold different opinions and both be right. And that makes it really difficult as a Jewish person to interact on any meaningful level with christianised people that I share minority identities with who don’t work on unlearning this.

If I think doing something is antisemitic and another Jewish person thinks not doing it is antisemitic, we almost always can both acknowledge that our opinions can be equally valid and correct. We can respect a goy who has to choose whether or not to keep doing said thing, regardless of their choice, as long as they’ve actually looked into the issue and are making an informed decision, because we know that they can’t listen to both of us at once. And we care more that they’re listening to Jews in general and trying to educate themselves than if they made the “right” decision, in large part because we’re aware there is no objective “right” opinion about a lot of stuff.

Whereas if another trans person thinks doing something is transphobic and I think not doing it is transphobic, if they’re christianised there’s a decent chance that they’re going to get mad at me and decide that I’m not only “wrong” but also a “bad trans person” for thinking the way I do. And if a cis person inspects all the sides of the arguments and has to choose whether or not to keep doing said thing, if they don’t choose the other person’s side then that person will try to call them out as a transphobe who doesn’t listen to trans people rather than acknowledging that not all trans people agree on every trans issue always.

It’s really tiring sometimes, trying to talk about any identities I hold other than being Jewish. People are so eager to take things in bad faith as soon as they don’t agree with it, and to label people as “bad” or “good.” And you need a truly nauseating amount of explicitly stated caveats (speaking of, none of this is an excuse for terfs/nazis/transmeds/etc.) otherwise people will intentionally read malicious intent into everything you say. But thankfully the Jewish community always feels like a safe place for me to engage in good faith discussions about issues without feeling pressured to all agree with each other by the end of it.

Goyim can reblog this but know in advance that I don’t care about you “not being christianised because I’m an Atheist.” Cry all you want, if you weren’t raised in an explicitly non-christian society you’re still  christianised and your tears mean nothing to me. I will not debate you.

[hurtfm]

                             〔 SOFIA CARSON, 23, CIS FEMALE, CURSE CREATION 〕                         ╰  LUCRECIA  ’ LULU ’  MARQUEZ  just  came  over  half - blood  hill .  you  know ,  the  child  of  NEMESIS  who  was  claimed  three  months  ago ?  i’ve  heard  chiron  say  that  she  is  RELIABLE & SCHOLARLY ,  but  if  you  ask  the  aphrodite  kids ,  they’d  say  they’re  NARCISSISTIC & TREACHEROUS .  i’d  say  they  remind  me  of  perfectly  manicured  nails ,  clicking  of  high  heels  on  tile ,  and  patron  filled  shot  glasses ,  especially  since  they’re  NEUTRAL  TO  THE  NEW  CABINS . 

hello  beans !  i’m  weachy   &   this  right  here  is  lulu  marquez .   she  is  also  a  brand  spankin’  new  muse   &   i’m  so  excited  to  figure  her  out  as  time  goes  on !  however ,   what  i  do  know  about  her  is  under  the  cut .   trigger  warning  for   excessive  rambling  as  i  truthfully  don’t  know  when  to  shut  up   ––   like  right  now !   anyways ,   as  always ,   if  you  would  like  to  plot  with  her ,   go  ahead  and   press  that  little  heart  to  the  side   &   i’ll  snake  into  your  ims !   i’m  so  excited  to  be  here  and  join  all  of  you !

full  name :  lucrecia  ‘  lulu  ‘  rosalía  marquez . date  of  birth :  april  29th ,  1997   (  making  her  a  taurus  ) gender :   cis  female pronouns :  she / her sexual  orientation :  bisexual / biromantic goldy  parent :  nemesis  (  goddess  of  balance ,   retribution ,  vengeance  ) family :  matías  marquez  (  father  )  ,  isobel  marquez  (  step  mother  )  ,   andrés  ,   sebastían  ,   samuel  ,  &  gabriela  marquez  (  half  brothers  and  sisters  ) playlist :  beautiful ,   dirty ,   rich  (  lady  gaga  )  ,  do or die  (  tony velour  )  ,  affluenza  (  conan grey  )  ,  play date  (  melanie martinez  )  , ��cry for help  ( macy kate  )  ,  good thing  (  zedd  &  kehlani  )  ,  all of the lights  (  kanye  west  )  ,  would i  (  maggie lindemann  )  ,  &  hotter  than  hell  (  dua  lipa  ) influences : blair waldorf  (  gossip girl  )  ,  carla  roson  (  elite  ) ,   jackie  burkhart  (  that  70s  show  ) ,  guzman  osuna  (  elite  )  ,  madeline  mackenzie  (  little  big  lies  )  ,  &  alex russo  (  wizards of waverly place  ) tropes :  femme  fatale  &  corrrupter pinterest :  linked  here !

01 .  past .

   the  marquez’s  have  resided  in  san  diego  for  generations .   lulu’s  grandfather  came  over  from  medellin ,  colombia  with  his  wife  and  four  sons .   the  eldest  of  those  being  a  twelve  year  old  boy  by  the  name  of  matías .   at  the  ripe  age  of  eighteen ,   matías’   father  had  created  the   largest  and  most  profitable  oil  company  on  the  west  coast   ––   marquez  petró ,  inc .   all  four  sons  followed  in  their  father’s  footsteps  and  although  the  work  was  never  easy ,   the  profits  were  extraordinary .  when  matías  was  twenty - four ,   he  met  a  lovely  young  lady  and  a  year  after  that  came  lulu .   two  years  later ,   he  married  the  love  of  his  life ,  isobel .   

   however ,   by  the  time  the  two  of  them  had  kids ,   the  business  didn’t  seem  like  hard  work  anymore .   after  matías  took  over  the  company  when  his  father  retired ,   he  was  making  more  money  in  one  phone  call  than  his  father  had  in  a  month .   because  of  this ,  his  family  had  seen  more  of  him  than  he  ever  had  of  his  own  father .   isobel  and  matías  had  four  beautiful  children  together :  andrés ,  sebastían ,  samuel ,  and  gabriela .   their  father  had  always  told  the  five  of  them  stories  of  him  going  weeks  without  seeing  his  father   ––   hearing  a  door  creek  at  1am  noting  his  father  coming  home  and  again  at  6am  noting  his  father  heading  to  work   ––    almost  daily .   he’d  tell  stories  of  the  times  when  he  was  old  enough  for  manual  labor ,   he’d  go  out  onto  the  sites  himself .   however ,  the  five  of  them  never  dared  touch  a  tool  or  step  foot  onto  a  site .   dirty  nails  and  greasy  hands  and   soaked  shirts ?   something  they’d  never  experience .

   that’s  how  the  five  of  them  grew  up .   learning  of  the  struggles  of  creating  such  a  business  yet  not  living  them  themselves .   this  caused  entitlement  and  pride  to  sneak  in  the  way  of  their  every  day  conversations .   their  parents  had  tried  to  keep  them  grounded ,  to  remind  them  the  sacrifices  and  work  their  family  had  put  into  this  business .   however ,   the  multiple  houses ,   memberships ,   and  trust  funds  they  were  each  rewarded  at  certain  birthdays  put  any  of  that  effort  to  ground  them  to  shame .

   however ,   the  stories  her  father  wouldn’t  tell  were  about  her  mother .   lucrecia  had  always  known  that  isobel  wasn’t  her  mother ,   but  until  she  was  thirteen  years  old ,   she’d  never  really  known  the  truth .   however ,   her  father  had  kept  the  truth  from  her  to  protect  her  as  well  as  to  make  sure  that  she  was  old  enough  to  comprehend  all  of  this  information .   it  was  there  she  learned  her  mother  was   a  greek  god ,   and  instead  of  attending  a  regular  high  school ,   she  would  be  attending  camp  half  blood .   her  father  wouldn’t  tell  her  who   ––   she  was  sure  it  was  his  lack  of  knowledge  exactly  because  he’d  been  open  with  her  about  everything  else .

02 .  present .

   when  she  started  attending  camp  half  blood ,   she  was  a  resident  of  the  hermes  cabin .   ironically ,  she  was  thankful .   despite  the  fact  that  there  was  so  many  residents ,   it  made  her  feel  more  at  home .   she’d  grown  up  in  a  big  family ,   despite  the  fact  that  they  weren’t  crowded .   however ,   as  time  went  on ,   she  whole  heartedly  wanted  out .   not  necessarily  because  she  hated  where  she  was  living   ––   but  because  she  hated  the  fact  that  it  wasn’t  confirmed  who  her  mother  was .   

   she’d  grown  up  with  the  greatest  father  possibly  in  existence   &   the  fact  that  her  mother  wasn’t  even  keen  enough  to  claim  her  daughter  made  that  so  much  worse .   it  started  getting  worse  and  worse  when  she  started  putting  the  pieces  together .   her  powers ,   the  one’s  she  exceeded  at ,   all  pointed  to  nemesis .   more  ironically ,   when  the  law  was  passed  and  she  was  finally  claimed  as  such ,   it  couldn’t  have  been  more  fitting  that  a  daughter  of  nemesis  was  the  one  who  was  so  against  the  new  cabins   ––   against  going  unclaimed  for  so  long .   the  anger ,   the  vengence ,   were  all  things  lulu  experienced   ––   practically  first  hand .   although  she’d  never  been  extremely  close  to  lyssa ,   she  understood .   even  now ,   knowing  the  girl  was  her  sister ,   it  only  fueled  that  anger  in  her ,   of  going  unclaimed .

03 .  personality .

   personally ,   her  mortal  life  is  the  life  she  lives .   she  has  kept  her  rich  kid ,   better  than  you  because  i’ve  never  had  to  lift  a  finger  personality  in  camp  since  she  was  thirteen  years  old .  she  is  better  than  you  and  truthfully  believes  it .   not  that  she  expects  the  ground  she  walks  on  to  be  kissed  by  everyone  in  existence ,   but  if  it  happens   ––  she  wouldn’t  fight  it .

   unless  you  have  her  respect ,   she  pretends  you  don’t  exist .   she  is  not  one  of  those  regina  george  types  to  put  you  down  to  your  face .   if  she  has  a  problem  with  you ,   she’ll  only  put  you  down  behind  your  back .   however ,  if  confronted ,   she  won’t  deny  it .  a  lot  of  her  first  interactions  have  the  phrase  ‘   i’m  sorry ,   who  are  you ?  ‘   attached  to  them .   she’s  not  bad  with  names  or  faces  in  the  slightest ,   it’s  just  another  reminder  that  remembering  you  is  not  a  priority  of  hers .   however ,  if  she  deems  you  useful ,   she’ll  put  on  her  gifted  smile  and  practiced  charm  for  the  greater  good .   the  side  of  her  that’s  real  isn’t  known  to  much  of  anyone .

   she  excels  in  particular  aspects  of  camp ,   and  is  ruthless  when  it  comes  to  those .   apologizing  is  not  on  the  forefront  of  her  mind  and  making  new  friends  is  not  a  priority .   basically ,   when  she  turned  twenty  one ,   becoming  the  best  at  what  she  loved  was  her  priority ,   and  making  friendships  or  having  fun  were  only  side  quests .

04 .  instances  of  her  powers  in  every  day  life .

looking  back  on  it  and  knowing  the  truth ,   lulu  can’t  picture  how  she  didn’t  put  it  together :

  decision  making   –––   in  the  silliest  way  possible ,   she  has  always  been  the  best  at  decision  making .   any  tough  decisions  that  need  to  be  made ,   she  can  do  them  with  no  emotion  attached  and  put  the  plan  to  action .   almost  as  if  when  it  comes  down  to  tough  choices ,   she  becomes  a  brick  logic  wall .   vengeance  sensitivity   –––   this  was  really  useful  growing  up  in  a  house  with  four  younger  siblings .   any  tricks  they  tried  to  play  on  her  or  lies  they  tried  to  sneak  past  her  were  quickly  debunked .   any  im  sorrys  that  weren’t  truthful  were  denied .   it  made  her  seem  cold  to  them ,   when  in  reality  she  was  just  waiting  for  a  better  and  more  sincere  emotion  from  them .   best  ally   –––   if  you  are  fighting ,   you  want  lulu  on  your  side .   although  this  is  attributed  to  her  mother ,   nemesis ,   she  likes  to  claim  this  comes  from  her  father .   the  marquez  family  has  always  been  extremely  loyal  in  their  businesses  as  well  as  in  their  family  alone .   because  family  is  everything  to  them ,   they  will  always  stand  by  each  others  side .   however ,   for  lulu ,   it  runs  so  much  deeper .   any  sense  of  betrayal  is  almost  like  a  physical  injury  to  her .   it  hurts  her  soul  and  spirit  to  the  point  of  actual  pain .   loyalty  is  a  two  way  street  but  you’ll  never  catch  her  drifting  off  road .   curse  creation   –––   she  didn’t  know  this  existed  until  she  started  attending  camp  half  blood .  however ,   as  soon  as  she  realized  she  possessed  this  gift ,   it  was  pretty  clear  who  her  mother  was .   it  was  the  biggest  give  away  for  her .   it  took  her  almost  years  to  master  &  now  she  has  it  down  pat .   she  mainly  uses  it  on  quests ,   but  she’d  be  lying  if  she  ever  said  that  she’d  never  used  it  for  selfish  reasons .

05 .  wanted  connections .

   because  she’s  been  at  camp  since  she  was  thirteen  and  wasn’t  claimed  until  she  was  almost  twenty - three ,   anyone  who  has  lived  in  the  hermes  cabin  for  the  past  ten  years  she  would  have  lived  with .   i  would  love  some  people  in  that  cabin  that  she  would  have  gotten  along  with  and  maybe  some  that  she  didn’t .   out  of  the  cabin ,   i’d  love  if  she  had  an  ex  or  two ?   maybe  one  that  ended  on  bad  terms   &   one  where  they  ended  up  just  friends ?   friend  wise ,��  i’ve  pictured  her  having  a  few  select  good  friends  and  a  majority  of  everyone  else  just  puts  up  with  her ?   i  also  would  love  1 / 2  people  she’s  gone  on  quests  with  before  that  have  maybe  gotten  to  know  a  little  more  about  her  that  has  nothing  to  do  with  her  hard  exterior .  lastly ,   any  other  friends  with  benefits  or  enemies  would  be  great  too !

[hypocrisyofandrewdobson]

Special Request: Andrew Dobson vs @crap-hell (Part 2)

aka Dobson is a condescending sexist hypocrite

Link to Part One Here

When we last left off, Dobson had made a number of random accusations as “proof” that Quiet was problematic and Kojima was a sexist, including that there were YouTube compilations of sexy female moments of MGS:V, that Megan Fox was the best and most fleshed out character in the first Transformers movie, and that Quiet being mute “took away her agency as a character”.

@crap-hell responded back by pointing out how flawed that reasoning was, and that if he really wanted to “listen to women” as he claimed, maybe he should start by actually listening to her instead of stroking his own ego.

Now, I think it safe to say that @crap-hell has made it blatantly apparent through this entire exchange that she’s a woman(the people Dobson is supposedly speaking for), especially in that last paragraph.

Naturally, this is also the point where Dobson starts to blatantly talk down to her, insulting her intelligence multiple times and implying that she’s too stupid to Google things, and that’s why she’s not agreeing with him. Keep in mind that all his proof is just a couple random YouTube videos.

“...you’re just really bad at searching for videos.”

“Sigh...you’re really bad at analyzing things, aren’t you?”

“...you’re ignoring women...”

“...because I see you have trouble googling things yourself...”

Note how he’s suddenly much more condescending towards her, belittling her at every opportunity while at the same time claiming to use his “white privilege” to speak up for women and minorities , because people won’t listen to them. As if he’s doing all this ranting and raving to support some unnamed “women and minorities” who find Quiet so offensive and problematic but are too scared to speak up or something, so they need a “straight cis white man” like Dobson to speak for them.

Also, what exactly does “white privilege” have to do with anything in this scenario? Wouldn’t he be talking about his “male privilege” for this particular situation if he’s trying to make a point about sexism?

It’s almost as if he’s completely full of shit or something

It’s at this point, a third party comments on this entire interaction, mostly siding with Dobson but also pointing out that he’s suddenly being a real dick to @crap-hell for some reason. They even point out exactly why people would take issue with Dobson’s arguments, since he’s never actually played the games and therefore does not know the context of said scenes.

(Name has been censors by me)

And here is where Dobson’s sexism comes out in full force, and the bit I alluded to in Part One.

(The red circles are my doing.)

Note that in the entire post, whenever he is referring to @crap-hell , he goes well out of his way to only refer to her as “they”, making sure not to make it apparent that it’s a woman disagreeing with him.

Now some of you reading this post that aren’t familiar with Dobson might be thinking “well, it’s a little odd, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that he was trying to hide she was a girl”, and you’d normally be right. That isn’t concrete evidence he’s being sexist.

The fact that this isn’t the first time he’s done something like this is, however.

https://hypocrisyofandrewdobson.tumblr.com/post/170999671267/link-to-the-part-3-found-here-have-another-look

A few years back when Dobson was angrily tweeting about @plebcomics (this was before he had been banned from Twitter multiple times), he also went out of his way to ensure he didn’t refer to her as a she. He even admitted to doing so later on when lying about another incident involving blackmailing and misgendering a teenage trans male.

Note that he fully admits to not referring to @plebcomics as “she” to be malicious, but then also turns around and says “lol how is using non-gender pronouns insulting?” as if he didn’t just admit he did so filling intending to be insulting. He even called it “having fun” at her expense.

(I’ll also point out that he’s laying through his teeth regarding both incidents: @plebcomics was never ”pissed off” about not being called she, she just wanted him to show that he was in fact talking shut about a woman, since he always claims to never do and to always be speaking up for and defending them. She was not stealing his art, one of his paying Patreons were passing the artwork to her. As for blackmail and misgendering a teenage trans man, that’s an entirely different can of worms altogether. But I recommend checking out the Masterpost for more information.)

Now trying to completely invalidate @crap-hell ‘s gender simply to hide both that he was treating a woman like shit and that a woman was disagreeing with him is bad enough, but I want to draw special attention to that last thing he said in the “they” post.

Unless, of course, you’re a woman that doesn’t agree with Dobson’s viewpoints or doesn’t want him speaking for you. Then he’ll just deny that you’re female, hide your comments from the Notes of the post, and then most likely be ready to block you in case you respond and point out that you are indeed a woman.

Because that’s the way Dobson operates. For as much as he likes to claim and brag about being a male feminist and LGBT ally, he’s much more sexist and much more condescending than anything or anyone he accuses of being sexist. Because it’s really all about satiating his own bloated ego.

The full tumblr post I’ve dissected here can be found here: https://adobsonartworks.tumblr.com/post/187813253030/help-me-understand

And just in case he later decides to delete said post to hide what he said, an archive can be found here:

http://archive.li/axV3t