#but also GETTING BACK TO BEING MORE ACTIVE HERE

[selenascorner]

GOT HERE FIRST, TOO LATE - C.S.

Pairing: Chris Sturniolo x fem!reader

Summary: You've been in a situationship with Chris for quite some time. Feeling weary of this, you decide to stir things up when his brother Matt shows interest in you. After all, if he isn't ready to call you his out loud, he shouldn't get bent out of shape about it.

Warnings: MDNI, 18+ content, dom!chris, possessive!chris, rough sex, teasing, degradation kink, unprotected sex, oral (m!receiving), deepthroating, face riding, missionary, sex tape, edging, orgasm denial, use of pet names, angst, jealousy, cursing.

a/n: settle in ig, this is 4,4k words; also i listened to unforgettable on repeat while writing this

On a casual Saturday night, you were on your way to meet some friends at a bar. This was a well-deserved break after a stressful week of work. It was just you and your friends, but one of them was more than that - Chris. Your relationship with Chris was a secret, shared only when no one else was looking. He didn't want an official relationship for various reasons - the fans, his busy schedule, and his fear of commitment. Yet, he only desired you. Despite being his secret, you couldn't help but want him more each time you saw him. His treatment of you was special and caring, unlike anyone else.

Upon entering the bar, the scent of beer greeted you. You looked around, spotting your friends at a table, laughing and chatting. You approached them, smiling at the sight of Matt, Nick, and Chris.

As you neared, Matt waved at you with a genuine smile. Nick and Chris turned around, with Nick waving and Chris just smirking. Your heart pounded in your chest as you neared the table, with Chris' smirk doing nothing to calm your nerves.

"Hello, fancy people," you greeted, placing your purse on the chair next to Chris.

"Hey y/n, we missed you lots!” Nick exclaimed, giving you a warm hug. Matt also got up, wrapping his arms around your waist.

"How have you been?" Nick asked as he sat back down. You turned to Chris, who simply raised three fingers in greeting. "Hi," you responded, sitting next to him.

"I've been good," you answered, turning your attention to Nick and Matt while Chris smirked at you.

“Alright, alright. What you been doing? You up to something?” Nick asks you, you shake your head, crossing your legs under the table.

“I haven’t been doing nothing special, it’s just like that. I’m so stressed because of work though, I’m glad we finally fitted a night out that is somewhere else rather than your place. Was getting tired of the smell of junk food.” You say, a chuckle escaping your lips.

Suddenly, your phone lit up with a text from Chris.

chris

come closer, don’t be shy

You glanced at him, seeing his smirk, and decided not to give in to his request. Instead, you focused on your conversation with Matt and Nick. However, Chris scooted his chair closer to you, unnoticed by the others. You felt his hand slowly move up your leg, causing your heart to flutter with nerves.

You shake your head and your eyes shut, aware of what he’s doing, your face getting hot as all you can see is Nick and Matt laughing.

You hummed, enjoying his movements. Your attention was instantly grabbed when Nick slapped his hand onto the table, calling Chris' name.

"Dude, what the hell?" Chris asked, as Nick stood up.

"Bathroom. Need to talk to you," Nick replied. Chris grabbed his phone before standing up, giving you a quick glance to let you know he would return soon. That left you alone with Matthew.

You and Matthew didn't often converse. He was more of a quiet person, but this time he seemed like he was in the vein to talk.

"So, why are you so stressed?" He abruptly asked, prompting you to shift uncomfortably in your seat.

"Work's been a bit overwhelming. I have too much to do by the end of June," you answered. He tilted his head in confusion.

"What kind of stuff? Can we help in any way?" He inquired, activating the Do Not Disturb mode on his phone as a sign of respect toward you.

"Well, I don't think you guys can help, but thank you for showing interest," you replied with a smile.

"Are you sure? Anything at all?" He leaned back in his chair, his eyes sincere. Sometimes you wished Chris had Matthew's temperament, but it was what it was. Unfurtunately you liked Chris for what he was, not for what he could’ve been.

"Yes, Matt. I'm okay. But you could pay for dinner to really help me out," you joked, turning around and reaching into your purse for a hair tie.

"Alright," he just agreed, adjusting his hat.

"What?" You turned immediately around, taken aback by his response.

"I'll pay for dinner," he repeated, removing his hat to fix his hair before putting it back on.

"Wait- no, I wasn't serious, I was joking-" you protested, but he quickly dismissed your concerns.

"Relax, y/n. It's no problem at all," he laughed at your reaction, but you couldn't help feeling guilty for making the paying joke.

"Matthew, seriously, I was joking. Please, I'll feel guilty," you insisted, reaching for your wallet. He stopped you gently, placing a hand on yours, and you couldn’t help but glance at this.

“Y/n, you need to relax. This is the least I can do. Let me pay," he calmly reassured you. His sincerity was apparent. He genuinely wanted to do it.

"Are you sure? I don't want to make you-“ you began, but he cut you off, his thumb softly brushing against your hand.

"Completely sure. Chris and Nick probably would've made me pay anyways, so it's no big deal," he said, laughing as he glanced around the room. You were too focused on him.

"Alright, big man. Thank you," you said jokingly, a smile spreading on your face, his hand still on yours, giving a little squeeze. You were interrupted by Chris, who threw himself into his chair. That was probably why Matthew had been looking around. His hand quickly left yours.

"Please, don't mind me," Chris laughed at your interaction, scrolling through Instagram on his phone.

"I'm sorry?" Matt asked, catching Chris' attention as he chewed on some breadsticks.

"What?" Chris asked, a teasing smile on his face.

"It's not like something was going on," Matt retorted, gesturing over the table.

"Matt, I don't care. You know what's surprising? The only girl you can pull is literally our best friend," Chris said, making you feel weird. He had never referred to you as 'best friend' before. He’s never done that.

"You know what's surprising, Chris? That you can't treat a pretty girl right. You always make us feel miserable because your attitude scares every girl away," Matt responded, clearly irritated. A smirk spread on Chris' face, knowing he had you wrapped around his finger. Matthew's irritation was precisely what Chris had aimed for.

"Sure, buddy," Chris responds, just teasing Matt further. As the waiter delivers the food to your table.

Matt pauses his speech, seemingly unfazed by Chris' indifference. Chris, meanwhile, starts eating while Nick settles into his chair, casually brushing his hands against his legs.

"So, what did I miss? Chris, could you pass the salt?" Nick asks Chris, licking his lips.

Chris, without looking away from his food, grabs the salt and hands it to Nick. This odd behavior leaves Nick feeling a bit unsettled.

"Thanks. Your food's not going anywhere, you know," Nick jokes, sprinkling some salt over his fries.

"What did you mean by 'sure, buddy'?" Matt asks, his meal cooling as he hesitates to touch it.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Chris replies, taking another bite of his burger and completely ignoring Matt's question.

"What the hell does that mean?" Matt demands, causing Nick to turn at the sound of his harsh word.

"What's going on?" Nick asks, looking at Matt and Chris, a concerned expression on his face.

"Matt, I'm eating. D’you mind?" Chris says, finally looking up. 

“’m sorry.” You feel guilty about the tension at the table, so you excuse yourself to the bathroom, getting up from your chair and rushing to it, feeling the urge to cry but holding the tears back as much as you could.

In the bathroom, you try to calm yourself. A sudden knock on the door startles you, but you wait for the person to identify themselves before opening it.

"Y/n? Can you open this fucking door? I'm trying to eat," Chris' voice comes through the door.

You quickly open the door to see Chris looking at you, concern etched on his face at the sight of your watery eyes.

"What happened?" He asks. You avoid his gaze, but he gently lifts your chin to make you look at him.

"I'm not playing, Y/n. What's wrong?" he asks again, his tone firmer. He wants an answer.

“Chris I- I really wasn't doing anything with Matt," you explain him, nervously fidgeting with your shirt.

"Matt was trying to do something with you, though," Chris says, gritting his teeth.

You just gulp, shaking your head as Chris places a reassuring kiss on your forehead.

"Don't worry. I got exactly what Matt was trying to do. I'll show him what he got from it," he murmurs into your ear, tucking a loose strand of hair behind it. "I'll get us a hotel room after dinner, okay?" Despite the situation, you can't help but feel excited. You nod at him, and he gives you a reassuring smile before leading you back to the table.

Back at the table, he does nothing, he simply sits on his chair as soon as he reaches the table and continues his meal as if nothing happened between you guys.

You begin to eat your burger, feeling a bit embarrassed by the situation you are in. It wasn't really your fault, though you wonder why you didn’t tell Matt to back off. But if Chris isn't ready to acknowledge your relationship in front of others, you don't see it as a problem. Despite everything, you find yourself really liking Chris. You steal glances at him as he enjoys his meal, seemingly oblivious to the world around him. You give Matt a playful smile, biting your cheek to suppress your embarrassment.

"Hey, Y/n, it just occurred to me, you haven't been hit by cupid's arrow yet, have you?" Matt asks, laughing as he takes a bite of his burger, as you cringe as his own question.

Chris drops his burger for the first time that day, clearly agitated by Matt's teasing, rolling his eyes to the ceiling.

"Uhh... I haven't. But I'm good. I don't need one," you simply answer.

Nick chimes in, "It's weird you haven't found a boyfriend yet.”He says, and Chris can’t help but tease you at the occasion.

"Yeah, really weird," Chris echoes, feigning amusement.

"I'm not looking for one. At all," you spat, your cheeks turning red.

"But you're fucking someone, right?" Chris teases you further by asking this, causing you to gasp and Nick to choke on his food.

"Whoa, alright Chris," Nick intervenes, as he laughs nervously.

"Man, I'm just curious. She's our best friend, right Y/n?" Chris says, pointing at you, licking his lips..

Nick steps in to defend you, "That’s none of your business, Chris. Leave her alone."

"Alright, alright," Chris concedes, lifting his hands in surrender.

"But are you seeing someone, Y/n?" Matt asks, taking a sip of his drink.

"Didn't you hear what Nick said? Leave her alone," Chris retorts, mocking Nick’s tone.

"See, Matt asked politely. You didn’t. ‘Are you fucking someone?’” Nick says, mimicking Chris' earlier tone and expression.

This provokes Chris to stand up and walk over to Matt, "Wallet, your turn." Matt gives you a playful glance, his lips mouthing the words ‘told you.

"There we go," Chris says, handing Matt his own wallet. You were waiting for him outside the restaurant, knowing that he wouldn't take long.

Nick opens the back door of Matthew’s car, noticing how you don’t walk over them.  

“Come on, we can take you home if you’d like.” Nick says, inviting you.

You’re about to open your mouth, however, Chris interrupts before you can reply,

“We have some things to do. I'll walk her home. It’s not a long walk, anyways.”

"But-" Matt starts to protest, but Chris wraps an arm around your neck.

"We're supposed to... do something together," you state, a hint of shyness in your voice. The thought of what you're about to do together fills your mind, different scenarios playing in your head.

"But-" Matt tries to interject again, but this time Nick stops him.

"Matt, let them be. They'll be back, right?" He asks and the both of you nod, Chris giving you a pleased smirk.

Matt proposes to you. Chris can't help but chuckle, the way he’s trying too hard is just so funny to him. You simply nod in response before Chris waves them goodbye and leads you in the opposite direction from where their car is parked, and Chris pulls you into the nearest hotel he can find, just around the corner.

“Chris- the prices are crazy here-“ you try to argue, but Chris doesn't let you finish.

"I don't fucking care," he interrupts, approaching the front desk with a fake smile, letting go of you.

“Hello, a room for two, please." he requests, as the receptionist begins typing on her computer.

"When would you like the room?" she asks, looking up at him.

"Immediately, if possible. Just for a few hours," he answers, while you stand quietly by his side.

"Would you prefer a standard room or a suite?" she questions, to which Chris promptly responds, “Suite’s fine.” He pulls out his wallet from his pocket.

"Could you provide your IDs, please?" she enquires, you watch as Chris reaches into your bag for your wallet, retrieves both your IDs, and hands them to her.

"Excellent, here is your key. The room number is 205. If you need anything, please call the reception from the desk phone. Enjoy your stay!" she says, as Chris pays for the room.

You're stunned that he's got you a suite. You had a hunch about what was coming next, and strangely enough, you were looking forward to it. Chris leads you to the elevator, not even looking at you. The thought of your dinner conversation with Matt has him seething. He was fuming mad, the words 'wanna do something later at my place' made him snap, and said by his own brother? God. As if you were going to fuck him. You were his. Not Matt’s, you were Chris’.

As soon as the elevator dings to signal your floor, he hurries you to your room. As you enter, he locks the door behind you tightly.

He sighs, places your bag on the desk and flops onto the bed, arms behind his head. You just gaze at him, waiting for him to speak first, anxiety rising in your chest.

"Strip," he finally commands, not even bothering to shift positions.

You comply without hesitation, looking at him as you remove your shoes, socks, shirt, and pants. Left only in your underwear, being braless, you go to remove them too, but he stops you.

"No, c’mere," he says, patting the space next to him. You oblige, walking up to him and finally straddling him as he remains laid back.

He pulls you closer by your hips, his hair brushing against your chest. He then slides down onto the bed fully, lifting you so your underwear meets his face. He rips them apart with his mouth, which makes you complain.

"Chris, what the fuck!” you say as he further tears them with his fingers and discards them on the floor. His face then dives into your wet cunt, pleasuring you like a man starved. He ate you like you were a meal, and as he hasn’t eaten in days.

You let out a loud moan, and you can't help but look down at him. The way he grips your thighs while sucking your bud is enough to make you whimper. He eagerly plays with your clit, alternating between it and your entrance, sending jolts of pleasure coursing through your body.

You moan his name loudly, and he responds with a hard slap on your ass, reminding you that you could be heard, and you just moan louder.

“Fuck- Chris, oh my god, I’m so close, fuck!” you manage to get out before he slaps your ass again, signaling that you're not allowed to cum yet.

You groan, knowing he won't let you finish. Just when you were about to pull away from him, he grabs your thigh, forcing you to stay in place, your clit bumping against his nose, making you bite your teeth to muffle your moans. The pleasure was overwhelming. You close your eyes, ready to climax, but just as you're about to let go, he pulls away from your saturation, panting heavily while pushing his hair back.

"Turn around.” he instructs with labored breaths. You turn around, confused, so your ass is now in his face.

It’s not until you lift your hips for him and feel his nose teasing your entrance while his mouth pays attention to your clit that you understand what he's doing.

"Chris, oh my god!" you moan, and he rewards you with another slap on your ass.

He starts to flick your clit with his tongue, and that's what pushes you over the edge, giving it slow teasing kitten licks.

“‘m gonna- Chris, ‘m gonna cum..” you warn, your climax suddenly hitting you as your legs shake around his head. He doesn't let you go, continuing to pleasure you throughout your orgasm, sucking on your bud.

"Oh, fuck…” you gasp as you come down from your high, his mouth still on your clit, his nose now covered in your juices, making you bite your lip at the thought.

"Chris, it's sensitive!" you say, clenching your muscles as he finally lets you go. Your thighs slightly bruised from his grip.

“On the floor, on your knees” He orders you, while wiping his nose from your juices, sucking it off from his fingers, his tone laced with fury.

He sits up, and you kneel on the floor. He brushes his hair back, finally looking at you.

In a swift motion, Chris unbuckled his pants, his shirt discarded carelessly on the floor. He slid down his boxers, they were just on his thighs as he approached you. He slammed his throbbing cock covered in pre-cum against your lips, a smirk spreading on his face. 

He held your face, inserting a finger into your mouth to keep it open, and then slid his dick between your lips. His size was intimidating, and you gagged as he filled your mouth. Your hand instinctively wrapped around his base, to take him better.

"Yes, choke on my fucking cock, fucking brat," he hissed, his hand gently stroking your hair. Your head bobbed up and down over him, each movement taking in more of him until he slid himself out of your mouth.

“Still," he commanded. You complied, and he gripped your hair, using it as leverage to guide his movements. 

He slid himself in and out of your mouth, using your throat to fuck his own cock.

“F-fuck… take me like that, you slut.” He cooed, his eyes closing in ecstasy, his head thrown back, a whimper leaving his mouth. 

He slammed his tip against your pouty lips again, and he suddenly pulled out, knowing he was gonna cum, leaving your mouth empty. 

"Get on the bed, angel. 'Gonna hit it raw for you," he purred, his eyes ablaze with lust as he tossed his boxers to the side.

"Spread those legs for me, hm?" he whispered. He got on the bed, crawling over you, as his lips finally met yours for the first time in the night, his tongue sliding in your mouth. He broke the kiss, and for a moment, he was silent, his eyes scanning the room. He grabbed something from the night table and then turned his attention back to you.

"So, we're gonna do something-" he started, but his words were interrupted by a soft ring from his phone. He picked it up and a smirk spread across his face.

"We're gonna show this to Matt ,so that he'll finally stop bothering my girl," he said, proud of his own idea. His phone was now recording, capturing what was happening in the room between you two. He teased you, sliding his tip through your folds, but not inserting it inside you. The anticipation building up to an unbearable level.

He finally pushed himself inside you, and your moan echoed through the room, his name escaping your lips. 

"Good girl, take it like this, mhm," he cooed, his pace slow and deliberate, giving you time to adjust to his size.

“Please, Chris…” You purr, desperate for him to quicken his pace.

He continued moving, his thrusts gradually gaining in speed. His phone recorded every detail, the moans the whimpers could be heard, as he framed the sight of your face contorted in pleasure, then the sight of his member sliding in and out of you, glistening with your arousal. It was all on tape, so that Matt could play it, again and again if he needed to understand that you weren’t his girl. You were Chris’.

He gripped your hips, tilting your body so that he could hit that sweet spot inside you. “You need Chris, hm?" he cooed, his tone sweet and gentle. You could only respond with a soft moan, your body too focused on the pleasure coursing through it.

“Yeah- yes, please…” You lightly moan out, his hips quickening his pace as he hears you begging for it.

“Yeah? Need Chris’ big cock, huh? What you gonna do for Chris, hm?” He asks, his tone seductive and teasing, and that led you to spill another moan from your mouth.

“I’m gonna be a good girl— mphh- a good slut!” You almost scream out, not able to contain yourself at the feeling of Chris slamming himself inside you. He brings the phone to your face once again, showing the expression that’s on your face, so pleasured and then back on his cock, now drilling in you faster, covered in juices.

“Yeah? Chris’ good girl? You gonna let Chris use you?” He asks, you nod immediately, your thoughts blurred in pleasure.

“Hm? Is Chris giving you everything you need?" He questions once more, now holding the phone above his head, as if capturing a selfie, flashing a peace sign to the camera, sticking his tongue out, while his hips are ceaselessly moving within you. However, he doesn’t allow himself to show your boobs on camera. That was just his thing to see.

“Fuck Chris, yeah- mhmm…” You hum, your climax getting closer and closer, a familiar knot forming in your stomach, being completely brainfucked. All you were seeing was black, and all you felt, aside of Chris’ fat cock drilling into you, was the soaked sheets and the sweat all over your body.

"Are you tired, poor thing? Come on, gimme that leg, mhmm," he said, grabbing one of your legs and placing it over his shoulder. Then he did the same with your other leg, changing the angle of his thrusts so that he was hitting your g-spot with every movement.

“Chris- just like that, fuck, yeah!” You moan desperately, his other hand gripping your hip.

“‘Feel better now, sweet thing? Worn out still and want me to fuck you, you must love this dick, don’t you angel?” He chuckled, as continued fucking you as he placed a  sweetkiss on your ankle, his dick driving you closer and closer to the edge. 

"See, Matt, this vision is a fucking blessing, and I get this every single night," he said into the phone, his voice laced with pride.

“I see why you wanted to see my girl like this too, but if you expect my girllike this, fucked dumb, so fucking horny you can’t expect to not see my cock stuffed inside her, y’know?” He says, his hand pressing on your stomach, knowing that’d finally make you cum.

"Shit- cumming! I'm cumming, Chris, yeah!" you finally screamed, your body convulsing as waves of pleasure crashed over you. His name on your lips, filled the room.

“This girl goes crazy for this cock only, not the lame replicas.” He said, and then you released all over his dick, mixed liquid and thick cum coming out of you, as he pulled out of you, his phone framing every single detail.

After what felt like an eternity, he finally pulled out, his throbbing cock glistening with your release. "Turn around, fuck- turn around now!" he ordered, his voice hoarse with arousal.

 You turned around, and he stroked himself, his release painting a messy "C" on your back with his cum. "You read that, Matt? Hm? Stands for Chris," he said, a chuckle escaping his lips. His phone captured the final act, his mark on you, a declaration of ownership. 

“Say hi to Matt!” He says, and you wave at him, your eyes closed. “Hi, Matt.” You say, completely worn out as he finally ended the recording and sent the unedited video to Matt without a second thought, a clear message that you were his and his alone.

He gently moved closer to you, pressing a tender kiss against your face. "You did so good f’me. So good,” he murmured appreciatively. The sudden loud knock at the door startled you, causing Chris to rise, his face appearing in the small opening of the door.

"Yes?" His voice echoing through the room.

"I feel compelled to bring this to your attention. There have been several complaints lodged regarding the level of noise coming from this area. It's becoming increasingly disruptive, so I must insist that all of you vacate the premises for now." relayed a hotel staff member from the other side of the door, his voice barely audible.

“Not gonna lie, I didn’t get shit of what you just said.” Chris says, making you chuckle while you still were coming down from your high.

"You guys need to leave. There have been complaints about the noise." the staff member clarified, his words resonating more clearly this time. Chris' face twisted into a frown.

“What?” He asked, disbelief coloring his tone.

"Do I need to call security?" The staff member questioned,warning him. Chris was quick to dismiss the threat.

"No--absolutely not. Just give us a few minutes. We need to... uhh-,” He trailed off, his gaze shifting to you, sprawled out on the bed, still recovering.

“You need to leave now," the staff member insisted. Chris slapped his thigh in frustration.

“Do I just walk out with my dick swinging from side to side, genius?" Chris shot back, a sarcastic smile tugging at his lips. The staff member sighed audibly.

"Fine. You have a few minutes," he conceded, leaving Chris to close the door behind him with a resigned sigh.

matt

1 video

@inkyray @mattslolita @hysteria-things @spaznongirl @worldlxvlys @nickgetsmewetter @patscorner

[aif0s-w]

There is this specific kind of a massive missile attack that russia does every other day.

It always happens in the middle of the night, to make sure everyone is exhausted. It is happening right now when I’m writing this.

First, russians launch a wave after wave of iranian-made Shahed drones. If the drones enter your region, you must wake up your kids and pets and go to a bomb shelter with them.

There are usually a few dozens of these drones launched. These days, Ukrainian air defence usually can strike down most of the drones (not all of them). However, even if the air defence works successfully, parts of the drones might fall on buildings and kill someone.

Second, you get a message: “xxx russian Tu-95 airplanes took off from the Olenya airport”. This usually happens around 11pm-12am.

I fucking hate this Olenya. I wish we could burn it down with the airplanes but some of our foreign partners either don’t provide us with weapons that could reach russia, or just forbid us from using their weapons on russian territory.

Third, if there are no drones in your region (for now), you might get a little bit of sleep. Meanwhile, the Tu-95 airplanes fly to the missile launching sites.

Fourth, the Tu-95s launch their missiles. This usually happens around 2:30-3:30 am. The drones are usually still flying around.

Fifth, the missiles enter Ukrainian airspace. This usually happens around 3:30-4:30 am. This is when Ukrainian air defence begins to shoot down the missiles - sometimes successfully, other times not because our air defence still needs more aid. At this time, you must go to a bomb shelter if you’re not there already.

This part of the attack might be happening for a few hours, depending on the number of missiles launched.

Around 5-6 am a russian Mig-31k airplane (or airplanes, if they feel like it) might take off somewhere in russia. This airplane carries cruise missiles which are hard to destroy with Ukrainian air defence. Sometimes it launches the missiles, sometimes it just flies around to annoy Ukrainians. When these airplanes are in the air, we always get a nation-wide air alert.

These huge attacks are usually over around 6-7 am. If you were in the shelter, you probably haven’t gotten any sleep, and you probably need to work/study right now. Coffee sales are usually up on such mornings.

When the huge nation-wide alert is over, it doesn’t mean the danger has fully passed.

For example, many communities in the Sumy region are getting shelled every day, with civilian casualties all the time. The region is bordering russia, so it can be shelled with artillery.

Almost every day explosions sound in places more or less close to the frontline or the border, such as Chernihiv, Kherson, Zaporizhzhia, Dnipro regions. There are casualties, and of course they are civilians.

And of course there is the Kharkiv region. The region is bordering russia, so it was never safe, getting bombed every other day.

If you’re following the news about russian-Ukrainian war closely, you might know about the new russian offensive in Kharkiv. They are actively trying to occupy parts of the region at the moment, so the whole region is in extra danger these days. russians being russians, they keep striking places with a big number of civilians, such as a hypermarket or a printing house.

There are also Donetsk and Luhansk regions. Parts of these two regions were occupied since 2014, some parts were occupied after 2022. The rest is pretty much a 24/7 battlefield. The air alert in Luhansk region hasn’t been turned off since 2022.

Now, if you’d like to support Ukraine:

- Come Back Alive foundation (military aid)

- Prytula foundation (military + humanitarian)

- Hospitalliers (medical aid)

- United24 (military + humanitarian aid, organised by our government)

Please donate here. Even $1 helps a lot!

Also, yes, all of this organisations are perfectly legit, they report every cent they receive and I have donated there myself

[jakesangel]

jake helping you w heavy periods -requested

heavy periods isn't something funny. cramp pains on the lower side of your belly, so heavy they will even spread to your lower back and thighs. on the worst days, the discomfort even interferes in daily activities. but since dating jake he wouldnt leave you alone in this : being with jake, means being supported 100% at all times. at first he didn't get it tho : seeing you suddenly in pain and in some kind of mood he wasn't used to it, he would freaked out, thinking your mad at him. are you okay, baby ? did i do something wrong ? he'd pout to you, not understanding at first on your sudden change. after explaining him you current condition, he'd be relived to know you aren't mad at him but he'll still be sad to be helpless. he would be extra cuddly, rubbing your skin where he thinks would help you, or kissing those places. he would also be more soft on you, understanding that your mood swings are coming from your hormones n you are'nt purely mad at him

after that jake would never be unprepared again. he had bought heat pack for you lower body pains, snacks, pads or tampon of different size, n kept all of those in a designed place for you in his bedroom. jake would never leave his angel in pain alone, so either you're at his dorm or your own place, he will come to you w those product to help. you also don't need him to tell him when you get your periods, as he would track them thanks to phone apps. he won't tell you tho, he will just be extra caring on those days, leaving you comforting and supportive text messages and bringing you your favorite food and snacks on those days. he would even buy you a special plushie, he'd ask you to hug when he isn't there for you, dressing it w your fav shirt of his and spraying his perfume on it.

but one the days he is finishes his schedule earlier, he will come to you, without forgetting to bring the products he bought especially for those days. he would text you before coming over , telling you that he will use the emergency keys of your apartment. once arrived, he will super soft for you : he would become your legs and your arms, holding you in his arm, bridal style, because you are his princess, if you need to go to the toilet. he wouldn't hold you without making you laugh, dramatically playing like a knight, trying to make you forget about your current pain. i'm afraid that won't be possible, princess y/n, he'd say taking your body in his, me as your knight in armor, wouldn't less such princess use her feet in such situation, he would add, taking you to your bathroom. he would also make sure to keep the heat pack, warm on your body and his hands soothing your lower back, soothing you.

if your cramps are terrible, he would pout at your sight, feeling helpless is an awful feeling form him specially where youre the one in need of help. he will remain by your side tho, actively looking for pills against periods pains n would bring them along your snacks. he would then kiss you as a reward to be this strong for taking the médecine but also enduring this pain every month. you're so strong baby, i could never do it, hed say kissing your temple. or if your mood isn't the best, he will endure them and not make you feel invalid. oh baby why are you crying, he'd hold your face w both of his hands holding your cheeks, the movie is this munch for you right now, no ? he would then add, swiping away your tears. lets put something less emotional, m'okay baby ?, he'd finish, softly kissing you, adorationn spreading out of his body.

notes : hai anon here is ur request >< i wasnt so sure of what you wanted so i tried to stay general, tho i hope it still pleases you >< please lemme kno in the inbox !! i also hope youre done w ur periods <3

@imaluckygirl @luvj4key @stwrjvke @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @jaeyunpinkyring @pockettwinzz @jwsdoll @heeheeswifey

[madlori]

If the only thing you can lord over buddie is that bucktommy is canon, then you really didn't care at all about the ship.

7 seasons of being a family unit, being there for each other, having each other's back but hey! Here comes another underdeveloped love interest, but since it's a man this time, you don't care about Buck being stuck in the same hamster wheel, again, because he's kissing a man and that's hot 🙄

Also for all your doom and gloom about buddie not happening, do remember that Tommy/Eddie was an idea in Tim's mind at first, so Eddie can be read as queer, even if it's not in canon yet.

I guess you don't place much value on them being a family unit and always there for each other, and having each other's back...all of which is still true and will continue to BE true. But it's only important to you as a prelude to them kissing, right? It has no value in and of itself. I love their relationship. I love what they are to each other. But YOU are making me not want to see it, because every time they turn to each other, lean on each other, support each other, we have to listen to you shrieking BUDDIE CANON CONFIRMED or whatever, because to a certain genre of shipper (not all buddie shippers, etc) any interaction or feeling they have with each other exists only in service to the ship.

I swear to god, I'm gonna banish the phrase "hamster wheel" from y'all's mouths until I get an actual definition as to what you think it means, because from where I sit, to you it just means "he's with someone who's not Eddie." To me, it means that Buck continually fell bass-ackwards into relationships that weren't right for him, looking for something he wasn't even sure what it was. And heyyyyy, he's currently in a relationship that he actively chose and fought for, having learned something new and important about himself, with someone who makes him giddy and excited in a way we have never seen him be, who the people around him can see gives him contentment. But none of that matters, because it's not Eddie, and that is by definition his only appropriate partner, so he must still be on that hamster wheel. Also if we're going by creator intent here, Tim's said he wrote this relationship specifically to reflect Buck being off of it.

As for underdeveloped love interest? I wrote an entire ass essay about how MUCH we know about Tommy, and it's reams compared to anything we've ever known about Buck's girlfriends OR Eddie's current girlfriend who does not even have a last name. Tommy has been introduced in a way that integrates him with the 118, with multiple interests, a character arc of his own from his first appearance, a set of motivations and emotional arcs that are NOT about Buck, and something to actually offer in a relationship besides existing. Anyone saying he's underdeveloped is determined to read him as such, especially for the limited amount of time we've had him.

And I never said Eddie couldn't be read as queer. He can EASILY be read as queer. I said he WOULDN'T be. Those are two different things. If Tommy and Eddie had gotten together (which I give no more narrative weight to than Maddie and Eddie getting together, which was also a gleam in the eye at one point) I'd equally be saying that Buck would never be queer.

It's hilarious to me that I'm being accused of liking a ship because it's hot (it is, and I do, and that's...fine? there's nothing bad about that?) as if people enjoy Buddie because of the amorphous purity of it all and not at ALL because it's hot (it is and you should say so).

If my thoughts about this are so upsetting to you, just block me, dude. I promise I won't take it personally.

Also, just...learn to enjoy a ship whether it's canon or not. I've done it, we've all done it. It's not that hard, especially THIS ship, which has so much good stuff to it regardless of whether there's romance or not. Those of us who like Buck with Tommy are not taking away from you enjoying Buddie, or anyone doing so. It's not like...the State of Buddie will lose congressional representation if the population falls below a certain level. The existence of another ship does not affect yours.

[theaceace]

I know that canonically (show-wise, at least) St Hilarion's worked to cover up Charles' death, and nothing was ever really done about the disappearance of Edwin and the other boys, but even so, do you think the school has a reputation for being haunted??

I'm imagining Niko following various ghost-hunter groups online, especially when the agency doesn't have many cases going on, and occasionally the boys will mirror hop over to an interesting-sounding location, and they'll even get a real case as a result

So when she tells them that one of the teams is planning to investigate St Hilarion's (either it's been closed for a while or they have special permission to go during the summer holidays), Edwin and Charles steel themselves and decide to go, in case there are other ghosts there that need help ('can't imagine a worse place to be trapped for the rest of my afterlife' says Charles, who has been to literal hell. Edwin, who spent 70 years in literal hell, agrees)

So they go, with Niko and Crystal as moral/emotional support, except when they get there they realise they've fucked up and are there on the same day/night as the ghost hunters. They could come back some other time, but what if there really are ghosts here that are suffering? No one wants to take that chance, so Crystal uses her powers to convince them that she and Niko are there for work experience, or are friends of a friend, or are here to replace one of the tech guys who called in sick

Both Charles and Edwin are tense and uncomfortable returning to the place they died - Edwin had gone there after he escaped Hell because he didn't know where else to go, but they've built themselves a home now with the agency. This isn't like before, when it was the closest place to familiar he could find. Charles, meanwhile, feels colder and colder the longer they're there - his hair is wet, there are bruises flaring and spreading, and a faint rattle in his chest that would have become pneumonia if he'd lived long enough

But they need to be sure there aren't any other lost ghosts stuck here that need their help crossing over, so they keep going

(maybe, as a consequence of a door to hell being opened in the school, there are unusual happenings, maybe there's still a place where the line between earth and hell is very thin, maybe there's some fragment of a demon left behind, and they can do something about it)

Anyway, the most important thing is that Charles, either accidentally or in a fit of pique at the whole situation, knocks something over just as one of the paranormal investigators is asking for spirits to make their presence known. In fact, this happens repeatedly - the boys move things, change things around, their presence is detected somehow with the equipment. Crystal and Niko are doing their best to distract the team and ruin as much of the footage as possible, and at least once the boys do something on purpose, maybe because someone is being a creep to the girls (and yes, they both know that Crystal and Niko are more than capable of taking care of themselves, but this way scares the asshole more and is also funnier), and then also to fuck with their readings

Anyway, it's coming to the end of the night, the problem has been identified, and whaddaya knows, of course it's in the attic where they both died. This is fine, why wouldn't it be fine. They get started, draw some (invisible, ghostly) runes and start working their magic when, of course, the paranormal investigators turn up, because this is thought to be the most 'active' area of the school, and the body of a schoolboy was found here in the 80s

Yeah, they try to contact 'any of the boys who disappeared in 1916' and Charles. It would be fine if they weren't so irritatingly loud, Edwin's trying to concentrate, and Charles is now shivering and dripping wet, but they managed to ignore the team right up until they start speculating that Charles was killed by one of the angry spirits from 1916

At which point, Charles - half visible, clearly enraged, looking very much like the half-drowned and frozen kid he was, like a proper ghost - tells them to fuck off already before they get hurt, they don't understand anything, and how dare they give a shit now when it's too late

Which is, of course, the exact moment Edwin finishes the spell, and causes some sort of a magical rebound that fritzes the cameras for a second, throws furniture around, and knocks them all flying. When the cameras start up again, they catch Edwin kneeling by Charles, holding his hand, and softly telling him that it's ok, it's over, they can go now. Charles sniffs and smiles and knocks their foreheads together and says yeah, let's get out of here, and together they fade from view

The investigators think this means gay love can pierce the veil of death and save the day that now that the truth of their story is known the ghosts have moved on, and it's all thanks to them! How beautiful, how wonderful, how affirming! Perhaps one of the boys from 1916 tried to help Charles, and when that didn't work, they both stayed to try and protect other people from these violent spirits, and now their unfinished business is finished! It's so tragic and touching story

Charles and Edwin, who are putting their tools back in the backpack, roll their eyes and smile at each other

On the way out, Charles swipes the memory cards from the cameras, Edwin inscribes a couple of sneaky runes on various pieces of equipment to fuck with it, and Crystal uses her powers to make sure they all remember a couple of details differently, so later they won't be able to agree on a bunch of stuff

The episode they were trying to make can't be released, their social media posts about the experience are full of details that don't match up, and fans are bitterly disappointed

Crystal and Niko watch the footage Charles stole with Jenny and the Night Nurse back at the agency. Jenny turns it into a drinking game. Charles does a dramatic reading of the posts with added commentary while Edwin pretends he's not laughing. They buy t-shirts of the paranormal investigators and wear them ironically. They leave anonymous comments

Just. The dead boy detectives having to work around ghost hunters, in a world where ghosts definitely, tangibly exist

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Busy days give cute ideas-

Since the Hotel was rebuilt, Lucifer has stepped up and has started doing Kingly things again. Talking to the Sins- helping them sort out arguments basically- but also helping Charlie brainstorm ideas for bringing in Sinners and activities.

He forgot how busy being a King made him-

Then Reader, a Sinner that came after the Extermination because they saw the King Himself saying to try redemption -plus free room!- grabs him one day without warning, and throws him into bed. Just full on waits on his every need, watches a movie he hasn't seen before but does like, makes lunch and dinner for him, plays card games-

They do everything Lucifer has been seen enjoying. And Reader remembered? He barely spoke to them, but here they are. Being kind to him.

Basically a full day of reasons why he deserves a break, Lilith wasn't anywhere near as caring as he falsely remembered, and that he REALLY needs to get to know Reader now-

Lazy Dayz in a Dreamy Haze

Busy Lucifer x GN!Reader

TW: Overworking, relationship issues, sad feelings

(I am almost positive I made this completely gender ambiguous. Please tell me if I missed something or gendered the reader at all!)

Your fall from grace wasn't anything to really write home about. You were a grade-A lazy person in your mortal life, and that inevitably led to your less-than-amazing death. You could sleep wherever and whenever, find the best binge-worthy shows, and overall, you know how to relax for a good time. 

You were a little confused when you saw Charlie's original broadcast for the hotel. How could you ever be redeemed when your sin is just simply enjoying your free time? This seemed like too high a task for a mere princess to accomplish, not to mention that once word got out that the Radio Demon was helping her, it was even more of a put-off. 

You followed the story, though; Kattie Killjoy documented it every time something happened in Charlie's unsuspecting life. You also were one of the lucky few to witness the downfall of Vox’s pride due to the Radio Demon. 

When the extermination got pushed up to only a couple of days away, you had even more doubts about this redemption policy the princess wanted. When the broadcast showed Lucifer there, ready to strike down, the angels soon to torment more than just the hotel if they didn’t win; something moved in you. 

The following day, you packed up your small things and made your way across the city to the hotel. You didn't expect much when you joined the Hazbin Hotel. You saw that the king endorsed it, and if the king said it was cool, then why not? You didn’t reasonably expect your whole life to change, though. 

Not only did you gain a little family of friends, but you also got free room and board so long as you completed Charlie's exercises and you got to see him. Lucifer Morningstar was a pragmatic character in the grand scheme of things. Where his daughter had illusions of grandeur, he was there to make things happen and make things work. Doing this, however, cost him what looked like a great deal.

Lucfier worked day in and day out. Even though you lived in the same hotel as him, you hardly saw him not doing something for Charlie or one of the other inhabitants. Seeing someone doing so much to make a dream come true and not take care of his own was sad. Maybe this was when the first inklings of your feelings for the king kicked in.

Growing close to the others in the hotel, you eventually learn all about Lucifer's problems in his past, from harboring poor feelings towards his fellow angels to having to deal with losing Lilith and his daughter. Luckily, he and Charlie rekindled some of their relationship, but it was clear Lucifer worked himself to death to avoid thinking about the missing person. Lilith, though a once prominent figure in hell, was still not found, causing a lot of people, including Charlie, to assume she just never was going to come back.

You got confirmation about Lucifer's depression one rainy night sitting at the bar. You were busy talking to Husk about Charlie's upcoming bonding retreat when a groggy Lucifer came down to get a drink. While he sat next to you, the bags and lines around his face were as clear as day. For an immortal being, he looked like he was knocking on death's door. He had been working long into the night to ensure Charlie’s next adventure went on without a hitch. 

You had nothing against Charlie and immensely enjoyed her company. You can only assume Charlie hadn’t given her father a break because he was never this vulnerable around her. You knew Husk had a way to get people to open up, but you were surprised he was opening up in front of you. He looked exhausted, as if sleep had invaded him for nights. You wanted to hug him, wrap him in blankets, and tell him to sleep.

While looking over the man, you noticed a band of gold on his hand that he awkwardly fidgeted with. Taking the context clues and knowledge from those in the hotel, you'd bet that was his wedding band. While watching him drink his fourth glass of whiskey for the night, you leaned over and placed a comforting hand on his. “I know you don’t know me well, but Lucifer, you are doing an amazing job. It’s okay to stop and breathe a little. You won’t be letting anyone down if it’s to help yourself.”

His look was no less than shocked; from what you gathered, no one ever really talked to him in a comforting manner. “Uh, well, thank you, Y/N;  you know I am happy you joined the hotel. You will be an excellent Winner if we can ever redeem a soul.”

That statement struck a cord in you again. Why did he know that you would make a good Winner? He had barely even met you when you joined the hotel. He was always so busy and working that the most you two said to each other on a given day was a small hello. Yet he knew enough about you to tell you would make a great Winner. You didn’t know that Lucifer was paying attention from the beginning of your journey at the hotel. He always said his job was to help make dreams come true, especially his daughters. So when you came along and started helping everyone with your calming aura and comforting ideas, he took extra notice of you. That's why he knew all your favorite napping spots, how you put self-care and rest above everything, and how you wanted to help others as much as he did. 

From that day forth, you looked at the King of Hell differently. Instead of wondering why he was so busy and never saying no, you looked for all the times he grabbed that band. In doing this, you learned he liked to make rubber ducks, enjoyed the circus, had a fixation on apples, loved to sing randomly, and had a knack for helping others. 

Honestly, the last part wasn’t that surprising. Charlie had to have gotten that trait somewhere. With Liltih being AWOL and the stories you heard in passing about the woman, you figured she wasn’t where Charlie's helping streak necessarily originated from. Taking this knowledge, you devise a plan to help the King of Hell finally get some reprieve. 

Executing this plan flawlessly took a couple of days. From finding all the proper materials to convincing Charlie to make sure no one called on Lucifer, you had your work cut out for you. You didn’t know why you cared so much about what happened to Lucifer other than it tugged at your once-beating heart that he was so overworked and undervalued. 

The day finally came for you to stop the overworked man and get him to slow down. As he started his day bright and early, you were already downstairs waiting. His arrival was right on time, and everyone knew that when he asked the dreaded ‘what can I do for everyone today’ question, they all had to say nothing. 

When he heard he had nothing to do, Lucifer returned to playing with that ring on his finger. This was your cue to help him find a better way to distract himself than taking on millions of small tasks. You stood before Lucifer, hand outstretched with a broad smile, “Do you trust me?”

You were met with little hesitance, and before you knew it, you had taken Lucfier up to the day room on the top floor. You had set everything up for the first half of your relaxation day. There was a giant pillow fort taking up center stage of the room. 

Lucifer was taken aback. This was the sweetest thing anyone had done for him. It is a little cozy retreat away from having to work, a welcomed distraction. He was excited to see what your mind came up with. The whole interaction left a warm feeling in his chest, one he didn’t know if he was ready to explore yet. 

Crawling in, you beckoned Lucfier to join you inside and get cozy. The magnificent fort was littered with various comfort foods, cozy blankets, and a TV with what Charlie called his favorite shows. Turning on the fairy lights and TV, you immediately saw the tension in his shoulders begin to relax. 

You two stayed there for hours, watching shows, eating good food, and talking. Lucifer didn’t know when the last time he allowed himself to be this free with another person. You were content making sure he understood how valued he was, but you couldn’t deny the proximity, and the ease of the conversation was beginning to make you feel some type of way. 

When the final movie was put on the TV, you let out a slight yawn. You had never disrupted your sleep schedule and nap time for someone else before, and your body was beginning to disagree with you. Lucifer took note of this and scooted a little closer to you. When you looked up at him, he just patted his shoulder, and you understood he was offering assistance to you.

You laughed gently in your hand, shaking your head. “No, mister. I am supposed to be helping you, not the other way around. Come here.”

As you said this, you repositioned the situation, so Lucifer rested against your chest. Your arms were wrapped around him, and you were gently playing with his hair. Lucifer hadn't complained about this, so you deemed it safe to continue. His hair was soft, with a little gel from when he woke this morning. Eventually, your hand stopped moving as you drifted off to sleep. 

Lucifer was content like this. He hadn’t been held in so long. This was something he only dreamed of doing with Lilith once more. He thought about all these things and felt your hands slow and your breathing even. 

Lifting his head slightly to look at you and not wake you, he realized you were lovely. The thought initially scared him as he hadn’t thought of another since Lilith, but your compassion and kindness were a refreshment. Slowly, he rested his head back on your chest and took a much-needed nap. 

You had woken first, feeling Lucifer tighten his grip subconsciously around you. Smiling, you stroked his hair again as you pulled out your phone. There was still an hour before the final stage of relaxation day could continue. You closed your phone and realigned your attention to Lucifer. 

He looked so beautiful, almost angelic if you were allowed to say that. He let out tiny snores, and you could nearly not see the bags under his eyes. You gently caressed his cheek without thinking, and when he nuzzled your hand, your face lit up. You told yourself he wasn’t ready and to diminish these feelings immediately. 

Once the hour was up, you gently woke Lucifer with a light shake. He rubbed his eyes and stretched, looking at the now-darkened TV. Once he was situated, he got out of the fort with you, ready for you to lead him on the next adventure. 

You strategically chose the top floor for the fort retreat so everyone else could set up downstairs. See, your plan helped kill two birds with one stone. Charlie wanted a fun way to bring in more sinners, and you wanted to help take the stress off Lucifer's plate. In doing so, the Hazbin Hotel Annual Carnival was born. 

As you arrived downstairs, the carnival was in full swing. Flashing lights, games, food, and even a circus event were happening. You turned to look at Lucfier and shouted, ‘Surprise!’ He was astonished that you not only considered giving him a brain break but also made sure to add something physically fun. 

This was particularly useful in two ways: he loved the circus and would be tired when he went to bed if he got worn out at the carnival. You showed him around the carnival with a broad smile on your face. All the regular inhabitants of the hotel were the carnies and some outside friends Alstor enlisted. 

As soon as you explained everything, Lucifer had your hand in his and dragged you around. Though you were still exhausted, seeing this man so happy was well worth it. You participated in the games and the face painting. Lucifer laughed hard when he saw you get his Iconic makeup done. 

As you made it to one of the last games, you found Angel managing the Apple Bobbing contest. With a broad smile, you drug Lucifer over and place your bets on who could get the largest apple. You hoped the newly painted makeup would withstand this trial as you went first. Coming back up with a tiny apple, Angel had to make one of his inappropriate jokes. 

Next, the king himself went for an apple, not before blushing at the lewd comment Angel had made about you. He really needed to teach him that it's okay to keep thoughts inside. As he went down for an apple, he found a golden one and took his chance. Popping his head up, Angel rang a bell, signifying the grand prize. 

Lucifer was handed a giant white snake plushie with a top hat as his winnings. He smiled, holding the cute item, and then turned to you. Gently, he wrapped the snake around your arm and shoulders, smiling wide. Your heart fluttered at the notion that he had given you his grand prize, no questions asked. 

Over the loudspeakers, an excited Charlie could be heard asking everyone to come to the big top for the show. Lucifer was excited that his daughter, as a ringmaster, would entertain all these guests. As you two took your seats in the crowded room, the lights dimmed, and Charlie, in an adorable outfit almost identical to her father's, came out. 

The smile on Lucifer's face when he saw Charlie look and act like him was heartwarming. You could almost see tears in his eyes. Lucifer was notably the most involved watcher of the show, answering questions, raising his hand for volunteer options, and even performing a song with Charlie. It was a fantastic event that left many impressed. 

As the circus act ended, Charlie approached you and thanked you for taking over this task. She had already gotten many people asking to enroll in her redemption program. While Charlie was talking to you, it was missed by all the knowing soft smile Lucifer had while staring at you. He realized that he hadn’t gone to rub his band once this entire day since you showed up.

Looking down at his hand, he moved the band from his left finger to his right. He wasn’t fully ready to let go of Lilith, at least not in the semblance of her being the mother of his child, but he was ready not to let his past hold him back anymore. He walked over to you and Charlie and gently interrupted the conversation, asking to steal you away. 

Charlie said yes, giving you a big thumbs up before she went on her own way, too. You gave Lucifer your full attention again as he led you to the Farris Wheel. Climbing aboard, you two faced each other and began talking like earlier that day. The conversation seemed so fluid for you two, making this a beautiful moment. 

Once at the top of the wheel, there was a sudden jolt, causing you to move forward and land in Lucifer's lap. Both of you laughed gently as you resituated back in your seat. In doing so, however, you noticed his left hand was bare. You panicked, “Where did your ring go? Did it fall when I moved? We have to look for it.” 

Lucifer just laughed at you and shook his head. He showed you his right hand now adorning his wedding band. You calmed down and looked at Lucifer as he explained, “I have never been so well taken care of, Y/N. To say I appreciate you would be an understatement. For seven years of my life, I have lived in this dark shadow that I was at fault for losing all I held dear. Though Charlie has been there trying to help, I still drown myself in work to forget Lilith.”

Lucfier repositioned to sit closer to you, looking you in the eyes, “However, you have impacted my life since the day you arrived. I have been watching you and find your efforts to comfort and help those around you refreshing. I find it so amazing you even took time out for me to plan all of this.”

Lucifer gently touched your cheek as he continued, “I have loved every minute of this day, and as I began to love it more and more, I realized I couldn’t let Lilith control my life forever, especially if she wasn’t here. I am not ready to completely let go; she is the mother of my child, and I hope she is alive and well. I am saying, though, that I am ready to move on and try to live more carefree again. You, Y/N, have been a dream come true.”

Tears welled up in both your eyes as you took in the words. You smiled and reached your hand out to hold his. Hand in hand, you two laughed and looked over all of hell from the top of the wheel. You were happy he finally accepted being free from his past and taking self-care and love for himself seriously. It was also astonishing that you were the one to teach him this. 

As the Farris Wheel ended and let you two off, the darkest point of the night finally hit. Grouping up at the front of the hotel, Lucifer's arms wrapped around you. A beautiful array of fireworks went off while you looked up to the sky. Turning to face Lucifer, you felt like you were living a dream. Who knew Lazy Days would result in a beautiful Dreamy Haze.

[quinnylouhughesx43]

“He's been a bit of a jerk”

Summary: quinn suddenly ditches his childhood best friend on new years eve when they have spent every NYE together since they were 6. luke saves the night

Warnings: use of y/n, unedited, only brief mentions of quinn not actually active in fic but substantial to plot, if I missed anything please let me know

Word Count: 1,040

requested: yes - “luke pining after Quinn’s best friends and he finally gets the girl.”

On the frost-tipped grass, (Y/N) sat beneath a canopy of stars, her back propped against the rough bark of an oak tree. A light dusting of snow had settled over the ground, transforming the world into a perfect winter wonderland. She shivered, not necessarily from the cold, but from the heart wrenching realization that tonight was supposed to go different. It was New Year's Eve, and every year since they were six, she and her childhood best friend, Quinn had celebrated together. But this year, he'd up and ditched her last minute. Just like that. He gave her zero explanation and no no apology. He'd just vanished into the night with his middle brother, leaving her feeling more alone than ever. The two barely get to see each other anymore as it is. He lives in Vancouver and she lives in Michigan.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps crunching through the snow. A warm blanket was draped over her shoulders, and a steaming cup of hot chocolate was pressed into her hands. She looked up, her eyes falling on her best friend’s youngest brother, Luke as he joined her. His cheeks were already flushed from the cold, but his smile was warm and genuine.

"Hey, (Y/N)," he whispered, his voice still highly audible over the silence of the night. "I came out here for a few reasons but one being because I…I wanted to apologize for what Quinn did. He had no right to leave you like that. He's been a bit of a jerk here lately, and I'm sorry I couldn't do anything to stop him."

(Y/N) smiled weakly at the curly headed boy next to her, her gaze slowly drifting back to the twinkling stars in the sky. "It's fine, really. I mean, it stung at first, but..." Her voice trailed off, and she shrugged sloppily. "I'm just glad you were here tonight." The butterflies in Luke’s stomach were going insane at her last statement. “Who knows. Maybe we can start our own tradition together starting this New Year’s.” Luke was watching her features for any signs of a joke before speaking. “I wouldn’t mind. Teach Quinn to ditch someone as special as you.” She slightly smiled, still looking up at the stars. “Special? No. Just me Lukey.” (Y/N) argued, Luke didn’t want to have the silly argument back and forth. He just shook his head and groaned at her words before they fell into a comfortable silence.

The silence stretched between them, as she snuggled further into the blanket, (y/n) suddenly became aware that Luke was only wearing a thin jacket as he shivered. She glanced over at him, her eyes meeting his. "Here," she said, pulling the blanket off from around her shoulders. "You can have this. It's getting kind of cold out here." Luke hesitated for a moment, debating on offering to share the blanket. "No, really. It's fine. I'm warm enough." She shot him a glare. “Luke Warren Hughes. I just saw you shiver.” Her tone at best barely strict. He held eye contact waiting for her to continue, he could practically see the gears turning in her mind. “If you won’t take it for yourself, we will share it.” She says wrapping it around him and snuggling into his side. Luke was trying his best to calm the butterflies and his racing heart. While also fighting the mental battle on if he should shoot his shot at midnight.

(Y/N) is the girl he’s been wanting for years now. She’s right here. Cuddling into his side, a few movements and he could easily be her new years kiss. If she hates it? Play it off as a friendly kiss. Her and Quinn have been each others midnight kiss before, surely Luke could push it off as filling his shoes if she questions him and she’s angry.

As midnight was quickly approaching the air was thick with anticipation and more people were gathering outside.

The countdowns echoed through the night, each one louder than the last. Fireworks lit up the sky, casting a multitude of colors over everyone. The blanket of snow on the ground glowing iridescent colors. Luke decided it was definitely now or never. He may not have done it 12am but right now under the colorful display of fireworks was perfect. He smiled down at (Y/N), feeling a warmth spread through his chest, for the first time the butterflies in his stomach calmed. He leaned in, his breath fanning her cheek. "Happy New Year, (Y/n)." She felt his lips brush against her ear, sending a shiver down her spine. "I hope this year brings you everything you wish for." Her breath caught in her throat as he pulled back, their gazes locked.

In a seconds time he was leaning back in, his left hand making its way softly to the back of her head. His fingers interlacing in her hair. (Y/N)’s breaths were slow and deep awaiting Luke’s next move. “Tell me if this isn’t something you want. Because once I do this once.. I’m going to want to do this again and again. Everyday for the next foreseeable future.” Luke’s voice was trembling in want, desire, need. “Shut up and kiss me Luke.” (Y/N) sighed grasping his face pulling him to her.

“Remind me to thank my brother for being an ass.” Luke mumbles against her lips before getting lost in another languid kiss. “Lukey let’s go home. It’s the next year, I’m cold and I also want to thank Quinn, because now I know who the better kisser is...well I’ve not kissed Jack.” She pauses and makes a playful gagging noise. “And because it finally got you to make a move.” Luke’s face went more red that it already was tinged from the cold. “That..what?” He was baffled by her statement. “I had my assumptions. I’m just happy I wasn’t wrong. Now let’s go. I also wanna go get in bed and get warm.” She hinted towards cuddling and Luke was grabbing the blankets that were being sat on and her hand before heading to the car.

“Same thing place next year?” Luke asks her? She nods with a smile. “New tradition, with you. Starting this year.”

[auspicioustidings]

Ae Fond Kiss - Part 5

'Twas Past One O'Clock

Summary: You find a ghost in your house. Words: 2.2k

Parts: 1 2 3 4 5

T’was past one o’clock and you were ready for some alone time. By the time you got back to the house Simon and Joey would be off to the football and you could just chill out after delivering 250 iced biscuits for a wedding that had taken you all your sanity to get done in time. You knew the two of them would have left the house spotless for you. Simon insisted when he was home he handled the majority of the cleaning and Joey being the fantastic kid that he was always wanted to help.

You desperately needed to lie down. The morning had taken it out of you and you felt run down and a little nauseous from all the running around.

Maybe after you could finish off the album you had been working on for Joey’s birthday. It was all Johnny, the story of who he was and your relationship with him. The more time went on the less scared you got about telling your son about his dad. You couldn’t help but send a quick thought up to wherever Johnny was, a sheepish apology for waiting so long with a promise that you and Simon would make sure his son knew him.

It came as a surprise seeing Joey sitting on the front step rather than at the game. You were out of the car and rushing over when you saw the look on his face, like he had seen a ghost. 

“Are you ok? Are you hurt? Where’s dad?”

You were on your knees checking him over, frowning when you saw he had turned off his hearing aid and rapidly signing your questions instead. He only ever turned it off when he was upset and had very little hearing without it which always worried you. It was valid of him to want quiet when he was having big emotions and you never wanted to force him to keep it on if he didn’t want it, but as a mother you also wanted him to always be as safe as he possibly could be and that meant being able to listen for any danger.

“They were fighting. I don’t want to hear it anymore.”

“Who was fighting?”

“Dad.”

“Who was dad fighting with?”

“Dad.”

“What do you mean? Is dad ok?”

You felt your heart squeeze tight. It had been years since Simon had had a bad episode. He still had mild ones now and then, still had nightmares, but he hadn’t hurt himself or anyone else in such a long time. He worked as a trainer now, not spending much time away from home. That had happened 4 years ago when he was offered a promotion up to Captain and chose to instead come out of active duty. Eventually he had told you that it didn’t feel right being anything but a Lieutenant. He never had to say out loud that it was to do with Johnny, but you knew that’s what it came down to. If Johnny couldn’t call him Captain, then he’d stay as LT.

“Which dad? Because they’re both in there. Why didn’t you tell me?”

You searched Joey’s face. He was angry, sad, frustrated. It was in his expression and the way he signed. You tried to understand what he was telling you with your heart pounding and your mouth feeling painfully dry. You didn’t know what to do. Leaving Joey on the step was against your instincts, but now you were terrified for Simon. What on earth was going on? Was he ok?

You jumped when you heard a car door slam and turned to see a very serious looking John Price coming towards you.

“John? What’s going on?”

He looked from you to Joey to the house. 

“Is he here?”

You wanted to ask who he was talking about but Joey beat you to it. The kid was a pro at lip reading.

“He got here when we were about to leave. Punched dad, broke his glasses. I got told to wait outside for mum.”

You didn’t understand what was going on. Who punched Simon? It at least had to be someone he knew, more accurately someone he trusted. He would never have sent Joey to sit outside if not. If someone dangerous was in the house, Simon would have sent Joey straight to the pub down the street that Eyitayo ran. She was a veteran who had worked with Simon before and he trusted her to get you and Joey safe in the event of someone tracking him down. 

The fact that Joey was sat right here meant it wasn’t someone that was a danger to him. But also someone that would punch Simon. And someone that John knew was here. 

“I was going to tell you.”

You knew the look John was giving you. Guilt. It was a look you had become accustomed to from him, a look you got anytime the topic of your deceased husband came up. 

“Going to tell me what John? Who is inside my house?”

You knew. Who else could it be? You looked at John, waiting for him to say something, say anything that meant there was not a ghost in your house. Instead he looked shamed and in pain, knowing as well as you did by this point that your life was about to fall apart again. 

Perhaps a better mother would not have walked into the house and left her son sitting there. You were not better. You loved your son more than anything, but in that moment you felt dissociated from everything and everyone, the only sound the rush of blood pumping around your body which floated forward without your conscious effort. 

You saw Simon first. His glasses were broken, one lens a spiderweb of cracks and the frame warped but still valiantly clinging to him. There was dried blood at his nose, a streak from where he must have wiped it away. The beginnings of a black eye. But it was his eyes. You had loved this man for most of your adult life and you had never seen him look so broken. Not when he came home from a bad deployment needing you to take control. Not when the anniversary of Johnny’s death came and went with each passing year. Not when Joey screamed at him once that he didn’t need to listen to him because he wasn’t even his real dad (God he was so like Johnny with how his temper flared and he picked the most hurtful thing to say that he could before immediately regretting it).

The other man was sat on the sofa, head in hands. His hair was long. He looked older than he should be you thought. There was such a great tension in him that your disconnected body gave a sudden thrum between your legs, remembering what this man turned into when he came home from a bad deployment, angry and violent with nothing to turn it into but aggressive passion. But it was a wasted effort of your biology as your brain processed who was sitting in your living room and your stomach gave an almighty lurch, sending you with a stumble to the small toilet off the side of the living room to empty it.

There was swearing coming from the men. A rough hand brushed your hair away from your face while another rubbed your back. 

“Cap told me tae stay put but ye know me. Should’ve warned ye rather than scaring ye like this. I just… I couldnae wait bonnie. I just wanted tae see ye.”

He sounded like himself but not. His accent was a bit twisted now, something slightly wrong about the tone, something more Slavic now. But my God it was him. Older, harder, a little worse for wear, but it was your Johnny. Your John MacTavish. There was a hand on his face, fingers shakily tracing the changes. It took you a moment to realise it was your hand. He leaned into it, his eyes intense on yours. It had been a decade and this man still burned for you the way he had before he died. 

How you wished that he didn’t feel so strange despite it all. But then, who wouldn’t become a stranger after a decade apart?

“You… you died…”

“I’m so sorry. It wisnae supposed tae be so long. A few months, just tae make the world a safe place for our family.”

You couldn’t think properly. You felt so ill and so tired and it was overwhelming. You looked through the open doorway and tried to find Simon but even if he was there you weren’t sure you could get your vision to focus enough to tell. Your eyes were swimming you realised, tears blurring everything. 

“Did he know?”

“Aye.”

Your heart had barely broken before Johnny was making a choked sort of noise and pressing his forehead to yours.

“Fuck. He didnae know. Simon never knew. I shouldnae have said that, I just… you’re married to him.”

You didn’t think you would have survived if Simon knew this whole time. It was too severe a wound to ever hope for recovery. It was so like your Johnny, that knee jerk reaction when he was hurt that he immediately regretted. You were so unused to it now. Simon wasn’t like that, he was careful with what he said even when he was angry or hurt. Honestly you had wished sometimes he was a little more like Johnny because it made it hard to even tell that he was angry or hurt when he so rarely let it show. 

“You died. You died and I wanted to die with you.”

“I’m here now. It’s going tae be ok bonnie, I’m right here. We can move wherever ye want, ye liked it up North eh? Start again.”

It was like your consciousness all slammed back into your body at once. The bone deep exhaustion was tempered only by the sudden alarm at his words. 

“I- no, I… Johnny, I have a family.”

Oh, you had not meant for those to be the words you gave him. You had not meant for it to cause him to look like he had been shot. Although you supposed Simon must already know what that actually looked like. You wanted to throw up again. His hand on your shoulder gripped tighter, almost painful. When you flinched his face fell and he let go, backing up out of your space with his hand going to tug on his own hair. 

“I ken… I couldnae expect… if it was anyone else I’d be happy for ye. Naw him bonnie. It cannae be him.”

“But it is.”

You tried to wordlessly plead with your first husband, to have him understand. You could no sooner stop being entirely in love with Simon Riley than you could stop your own heart beating. Your solid and steadfast Simon who was outside comforting your son, who left you with the first love of your life because of course he would. He had been firm with you long ago in his belief that you would never leave one another, not with how tangled up you were. You had split up once and that had ended within 12 hours with you being fucked in the neighbours shed at a party for the cup final. How could you ever live without him?

It was as incomprehensible an idea as living without Johnny had been once upon a time. 

“Is everything ok?”

You saw the hurt in Johnny when you relaxed at hearing Simon coming back in. 

“Joey?”

“Gaz came to pick him up. He’s… as ok as he can be.”

He eyed Johnny warily as he pushed into the bathroom to gently help you up. You were so tired and you let your weight sag against him. 

“She needs to get cleaned up and rest a bit.”

“Aye I’m naw fucking blind Si.”

“Could’ve fooled me MacTavish given that you had her on the floor.”

“Fuck all the way off Riley!”

He was alive. He was alive and here and him and his best friend were at each other's throats. It was your fault wasn’t it? If you hadn’t fallen in love with Simon this miracle could have been met with only happiness. God you wanted to sleep. You wanted to be clean and to brush your teeth and sleep. You wanted to wake up and be able to hold Johnny, to prove to yourself he was here and real and alive. 

“P-please…” you choked out, not entirely sure what you were asking for. 

There was silence for a moment and you could only stare at the floor, swaying a little with how woozy you felt.

“...ye have that hippie tea?”

“Top right cupboard, I’ll…”

“Aye. Don’t you worry bonnie, I’ll have it hot and ready for ye.”

He ran a hand over your head, bringing it to your cheek and then your chin to tilt your head up to look at him. 

“I love you. So much” he said, voice rough with emotion as he pressed a kiss to your forehead and walked away. 

You barely remembered the shower. All you knew was that you were tucked into bed with your favourite tea and your exhaustion took you under fast enough that you couldn’t follow the conversation happening outside of your bedroom.

[teratosubmission]

 Humanfucker here, Humans are the most underrated Monsters

I’ve always had a thing for humans. I mean, there’s a lot of physical appeal to them. They’re small and cute and have beautiful contours and big personalities but you can just overpower them at any time and rail the cuteness out of them and fuuuuck. But there’s much more to a human that I think goes underappreciated with fellow humanfuckers and the larger monsterfucker community at large.

A human has hands, soft and dexterous. It’s said that their sense of touch Is massively amplified on their fingertips. And humans are exceptionally skilled at the soft touch (They have a lot words for soft touch in their language, like stroke, pet, caress, ect, which only make sense when you realize how important it is in their culture). A slow, gentle trace down your spine or up your legs can activate nerve receptors other monsters simply cannot, and it can feel extremely pleasurable when a human is behind you gently rubbing their hands over your back. While many monsters use their strength to keep their mates from leaving, humans often rely on their soft touch, which feels so overwhelmingly pleasurable you don’t -want- to leave. If you ever wondered how a small human can wrangle such giant monsters like minotaurs or werewolves, that’s how.

And the reverse is also true, humans are the most physically sensitive creatures, with the majority of their body being highly erogenous zones. It’s as if they were evolved for lovemaking, and entire subcultures exist around the concept of sex. (EDIT – so I did some research and apparently many humans are skilled enough to practice an erotic art called Massage (muh sahj), and apparently their hands can have healing qualities to them, soothing your aching muscles and overall just feeling really fucking good. Unfortunately its best done on their own kind, since they know their own biology and are basically built to enjoy it best, but I’m hopeful there are humans that are learning on other monsters and getting good at Massage for them… God I hope so, anyway, I want to experience Massage.)

I love their voices. A human, in my opinion, has some of the most beautiful noises you could ever have the pleasure of listening to. You could be engaged in conversation with one and find yourself lulling to the beauty of their voice. You could be fucking one and listening to how cutely they moan and whimper, it functions like an aphrodisiac for their partners. Apparently they don’t actually have persuasive superpowers in sex, but I don’t think that’s right, since every time they’ve moaned for me to cum for them, I’ve burst immediately.

Unlike most monsters, humans don’t have a breeding season. They’re ready to go at any time (sometimes they may need coaxing though~, I’ll link some guides on seducing humans). Now, if you want to actually breed one of the females you’ll have to understand a bit more about their cycles, but generally speaking you can just have at it till they’re eventually impregnated.

Humans have sexual dimorphism like most other monsters, but what’s intriguing is just how wide a range that dimorphism is, and how easily its defied as well. Want a male with feminine features? An exceptionally strong masculine female? Value something in between? Or perhaps you want a gender with the opposite genitalia? There’s something for everyone, which in turn makes them one of the most accessible and popular monsters available. But like I’ve said before, there’s so much more to them than their physique.

❤️ Anyway, humans are the best monsters and I hope someday to meet one! ❤️

[mrs-snape5984]

“I'll meet you on a day that never ends. I'll greet you in a way that heaven meant…”

“I hope you don't break my heart of stone. I don't wanna scream out loud and wake up on my own…” (“Idler’s Dream” by Oasis)

Considering, that I don’t see any way out of the misery, which my life has become since this cruel and inexorable disease ME/CFS has robbed me from being myself, I’ve started to commission some of my beloved artists of Snapedom with a special project of mine. I explained to them, that I’m slowly fading away from my life as well as from other people’s lives. It started two years ago, when this sickness got me into her relentless grip, forcing me to let go of the life, I’ve known before. Losing more and more of my abilities and strengths with each passing day, I’m finding myself in an unstoppable spiral of torments.

Nowadays, I’m not capable of leaving my room and most of the times even my bed anymore. Day in, day out I’m surrounded by darkness, silence and solitude. Participating in social activities, in milestones of my children or even in longer conversations with friends isn’t possible for me anymore. My presence has lost its meaning and purpose.

Whereas my phone didn’t stand still in the beginning of my disease, when friends and colleagues were worried about me…it’s getting more silent now. People are starting to forget about me…and yes, I can absolutely understand them. It must be frustrating to send messages or attempt to call me without getting a proper reply. My former boss told me some weeks ago, that people are feeling speechless about my situation, so it’s easier for them to forget about me…letting me become a faint memory in the back of their heads. This is exactly, what I meant, when I said, that I’m fading away…and it’s okay. I can’t be mad about it. I understand.

It’s also happening here on tumblr…and yet, here are still some kind people, who seem to notice my silence. I was astonished to hear, that my friend @capysnapeart, whom I commissioned for this beautiful artwork of Severus and my highly self-inserted OC Jules, searched me in a sweet post on their blog, after not hearing from me for several days. I was even more dumbfounded, when I realised, that other lovely people of Snapedom had also noticed my absence from my online life. This was very unexpected, but - indeed - touching and heartwarming to me. Thank you for not forgetting about me.

The project, which I’ve commissioned @capysnapeart and some other artists for, should show the different stages of the life, I’m expecting to have after my final breath, which doesn’t seem to be so far away anymore. I’ve set myself a limit…a certain point of no return, at which I won’t be able to accept and endure my pain and my suffering anymore. Well…let’s just leave it like that.

In my imagination, I will be able to choose, how my afterlife will look like. I will be with Severus, the character, I’ve been clinging on for the past 21 years, already. I imagine, that we will meet at the age of 11 years and from then on, we will spend the rest of our lives together...growing old together. It may sound strange and pathetic, but this is all, that I'm wishing for. I want to come home to him...

I asked Capy to draw Severus and Jules as a middle-aged couple…sitting on a bench in front of their little cottage at the sea. I’d love to see them being happy together…finally living the life, they’ve always wanted to live…the life, they’ve deserved to have! They’re cuddling on this wooden bench…feeling like home in themselves.

Capy, my dear friend, I’m beyond grateful for your understanding of my wish for this mesmerising artwork. You’ve managed to capture the peace and the silence of this scenery so perfectly, that it made me shed countless tears of longing. A longing for this fantasy to become true one day, when I will let go of my existence, eventually. Thank you for your talent, your kindness and your acceptance of my ideas. Feel hugged! 🫂🥹

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

[halfamask]

Naruto team group chat headcannons! Part 1

Team 7: Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke

I love these guys but they’re little shits and awful little assholes. You know every time they hang out with others they’re all:

Sakura: Did you See what Kiba was wearing

Naruto: no frrrr

Sasuke: Why does he always look like he’s trying to get shino and hinata to match outfits but neither agree to do it so he tries to match both of them and it never works

Naruto: bruhhh

Plus gossip monger Sakura and Sasuke who pretends to be better than that but isn’t

Sasuke: Is it just me or was Neji like. Extra asshole today

Sakura: no bc Ino told me that Hinata saw him and Lee get into an argument like two hours before it started AND OMG guys do we think Tenten has a crush on him

Naruto: :( Why are he and Lee fighting

Sasuke: Tenten fs likes Neji I just can’t tell if he likes her back

A healthy dose of “if one of us doesn’t like you we all don’t like you”

Sakura: Also guys Ino and I are arguing rn so we don’t like team 10 ok?

Sasuke: Again? Fine.

Naruto: but Sakura-chan I’m supposed to get ramen with Choji tomorrow!!

Sakura: Naruto!

Naruto: uGH fine

Naruto: But also we have to avoid Team 8 for a bit because Kiba’s being a dick

Sakura: Not a problem we hate seeing Hinata getting red every time you walk by anyway

Sasuke: Lmfao did you SEE Hinata hanging on Naruto today like it was worse than normal

Naruto: Cmon guys be nice

Sakura: N-n-n

Sasuke: Naruto-kun!

Their favorite activity is talking mad shit ok.

Also their chat is half Naruto sending shitty little memes. Sakura and Sasuke never find the same ones funny.

They’ve also definitely got dinner plans in the chat half the time like:

Naruto: Guys Ichiraku tn after training?

Sakura: I have to ask my mom hold on

Sasuke: I’m down

Sakura: Ok she said yes I’ll come

Naruto: Yessssss :D

Sakura: Calm down Naruto it’s just ramen

Naruto: Take that back RIGHT NOW ramen is a WAY OF LIFE

Sasuke: Just invited Kakashi so he can pay for us

Naruto: ^_^

Sakura: ^_^

Speaking of Kakashi they fs have running commentary and analysis on how late he’s gonna be for training

Naruto: Guyssss I’m running late how much time do you think I have before Kakashi gets there

Sasuke: Well training starts at 9 and it’s 9:15 so I’d say you have 30 minutes more

Sakura: Wait no it’s a Friday so he’ll want to get here early so he can finish early and go drink with the other jounin. You have 15 minutes max

Sasuke: But yesterday was Kurenai’s birthday so he’ll be hungover this morning so he’ll actually be later than usual

Naruto: So i can take my time?

Sasuke: No usuratonkachi get your ass over here asap

Sakura: Yeah please I don’t want him to hand us over to Gai sensei as punishment again. My body still hurts from all that running

[lorei-writes]

You seem genuinely nice in your curiosity, so I thought I'd share my thoughts. Maybe this is not the right approach to how to go about interacting on tumblr, but if I notice that there's a blog that I've interacted with somewhat frequently (whether it be liking/reblogging their posts, sending requests when requests are open, etc) and then I notice that interaction is one-sided (either they don't follow me back, they never ever like or reblog my posts and I see them interacting with many others in fandom so I know they are active), I dunno, but I get the feeling they don't like me or my posts, maybe I post too many spoilers, maybe I flood the tags and my posts are annoying or some other third unknown option - and then it snowballs and I worry I'm annoying others with my comments or reblogs or whatever. And I slow my interaction with others out of fear of not being liked or just plain shyness. And sometimes I have unfollowed them. Because, again, I dunno, but I feel like if they don't want to interact with me, perhaps I should not interact with them? When those posts come across my feed because reblogged by a mutual, I will sometimes read/look at if a suitor I like, but when I see who the op is, I become hesitant with interacting, and end up not interacting at all.

I know, devil's advocate - what if this blogger who didn't interact with me has never seen my blog or any of my posts. That might fly in Genshin or HSR fandoms, but not Ikemen. I think by now most everyone knows each other around here (at least those who have been posting for a while and post regularly/frequently). And I'm not the only one who has experienced this...

Thank you for listening to my rambling.

Thank you for sharing your experience!

Hmm... I must admit, Anon, what you've said has left me somewhat conflicted. I can agree that reaching out to a person repeatedly and the effort not being reciprocated can be disheartening. I do think that in this situation it is reasonable to adjust either your expectations ("I know they may not say anything back, but I did enjoy their work regardless, so I will share it." // no expectations of friendship, interacting with posts for the sake of posts alone) or the amount you give out ("I want to have some relationship with this person and they do not reciprocate, therefore I will decrease the amount of effort I put into this." // expectations of friendship, interactions as means of building relationships).

I can tell you that I do not know of a blogger who hasn't appreciated familiar faces in their notification. (Which isn't to devalue your experience. Maybe you met an outlier, maybe this person simply couldn't show it due to their personal circumstances, maybe they thought they showed it and a mismatch in terms of expectations occurred). I can tell you they shouldn't be taken for granted. But I also can tell you that, in some cases, which I do not know whether they are relevant to you, it is simply impossible to give back to everybody.

My experience is what I know best, so allow me to use that as an example. There's over a thousand people following this blog. I do not know all of you. More than this, I do not know all of the creators in the Ikemen Fandom. When I was primarily into Sen, I had no idea who was creating for Pri and was rather surprised to find out that some of those people were considered "big", as I went entirely without ever seeing their names. Even now that I have been invested into Pri for a year, I still find people I have never heard about before... And I still meet people who have no clue who I am or what I do. Likewise, Villains is a fog for me... As I would suspect the "old fandom" may be for you. So, I don't agree with the "most everyone knows each other around here (at least those who have been posting for a while and post regularly/frequently)" statement.

That aside, sometimes it is unfortunate, but it is simply impossible to give back to everybody. And it does suck. Just, hm... I suppose I'd like you to see me now, as it's something I've been struggling with and had to make my peace about? There is only one me. If "just" a hundred of people appear at any given time, or "just" fifty, it is still more than I can reasonably handle. My friendships with people who moved fandoms haven't dissolved and there are only so many relationships I can support. Reliably replying to everything here? I try. But I know I generally can't give back as much as I've received, or at least not in a personal enough manner. It is just too much for a single me. Due to my health issues I am chronically online -- what about people who have more robust offline lives?

Again, I do not know whether that is relevant for your case. It is only that I think it isn't you, as in it isn't about you being a certain way. The situation may just be a result of those mundane circumstances surrounding us. For me personally, a lot of luck is required to expand my circles in a meaningful manner. Of course, it still does suck in the end! Just maybe in a slightly different flavour.

Thank you for listening to my rambles and best of luck <3

[ask-the-rag-dolly]

ok the askbox is open. im taking this opportunity to say ohhhhh im going crazy over the narrative constructed here. specifically with how audience (anon) interaction is intertwined with the main conflict.

because its like.. we are inherently a BAD THING. yes, some of us are actually malicious, but even if we do have kind intentions, and only want the best for ragatha.. just being there is a negative impact that outweighs any positives. we are a parasite, after all. and technically, the only positive action we could do is to simply.. stop engaging. leave the askblog alone. leave ragatha alone. except we could never do that, because we're too curious now, too attached- we want to see how the story continues, how it ends. we cant leave well enough alone, we just have to know. we need to know. so the cycle will continue nonetheless due to our nature. and we have to watch as our main character, the person we're rooting for, gets worse and worse. knowing that its our fault, because we're choosing to engage. we're choosing this path of pain. because we're curious, and that curiosity would kill us if we didn't feed it.

and of course its on a tadc tumblr ask blog of all things lol. no hate btw. im here enjoying it after all! though honestly i say that like this had any opportunity of existing outside of the askblog genre... or even the tumblr landscape itself- i feel like the anon feature itself is also a big part of this sort of narrative, as it allows those actively malicious anons to be even nastier. because it distances us from our actions. like.. we're given a mask, something that obscures our true identities (both to the other askers.. and to ragatha to an extent, as most all look the same to her. who knows, maybe that one supportive anon trying to cheer her up is the same one also encouraging her downfall! she cant tell!)- a thing that wipes our hands free of any consequences. a chance to become faceless and untraceable- so of course some people will indulge. be as horrible as possible. because, hey, its not like you'll be getting any consequences for it! no way to trace it back to you! no way to be held accountable! you can just sit back and watch the fire you made grow higher. more bright. thats the main goal, after all- to make a spectacle! to move the story along and make it exciting! thats the only thing that matters to you. that its entertaining. not the people you'll be harming in the process.

anyways sorry for the fucking. essay. in your askbox. i like talking and also i fucking love dissecting meta-aligned narratives like this. gggrrggrgrgrrrr chewing on this blog like a chewtoy. i hope everyone gets worse and this whole blog blows up!!!!!!!

i can't stop giggling at ' its on a tadc tumblr ask blog of all things ' . this was really originally supposed to just be a silly blog with little story but here we are . you really won't get this anywhere else

i get pretty happy when someone dissects this silly thing so no need to apologize !! i'm my own harshest critic when it comes to this blog so it's often difficult for me to grasp what meaning people get out of this lol truly thank you guys for wanting to see my insane , Unhinged ideas come through

and i love the dissection on the mean anons - a lot of this thing hinges on actions having consequences after all ! every little thing will have an impact on ragatha's mental state . i'll say i think the anons have potential to not be as harmful - as there was a point in the blog's time where they acted more like inner therapists to ragatha than reality-bending beings of chaos ( good times ) . it just really depends on being patient with an actually mentally ill person like ragatha - it does fascinate me how people's frustration with her echoes real life mental health situations .

but yeah thanks !!! i'll be kissing this essay and pinning it on the refrigerator that i call my brain (:

[missmastectomy]

hello, pretty freshly detrans here. i finally understand what all those ‘annoying cis people’ meant when they said gender isn’t a feeling. like, actually, i fully comprehend it now. if you unpack all those supposed ‘gender feels’ it all wraps back to stereotypes and gender roles, whether you identify as a soft boy or a big rugged stereotypical man like i did. because that’s all gender is. and holy shit, i feel duped!

you’re telling me i could’ve spent all this time being a hot hairy butch who defied the social expectations placed on women but i was so entrenched in the idea that i was somehow a man, which is DEFINITELY a real innate category of being and not a made up social class assigned to a given sex to give them more power (sarcasm) that i lost half my family to it? that i argued with people i know and love over it? that i experienced trauma in the church because of it? only to realize that gender itself isn’t even real, something i knew the whole time but hypocritically refused to apply to myself. i’ve been scammed. i dressed up my personality in a blue box and told myself it was a boy. fuck.

at least there’s freedom in sight now. sorry to rant in your inbox, i hope it’s relatable if nothing else.

I completely understand. I also used to feel annoyed when “cis” people said they don’t know what feeling gender is like. The thing is, though, trans people’s gender feelings are actually very easy to understand once you get to the bottom of what dysphoria is. Often trans people will describe their gender identity as stemming from dysphoria, a disconnect between the mind and body. The discomfort and desire to be the other sex is so strong that people transition and the vast majority of trans people describe that as the state of “being a woman/man,” instead of “hey, I’m a bio female/woman transitioning in order to cope with dysphoria.”

I talked about it before, but if you understand why women get harmful cosmetic surgeries because they cannot stand living in their bodies, or why anorexics will hurt themselves in pursuit of a perfect body, you already understand half of trans identity. People often try to reinvent themselves when they’ve been rejected or traumatized. People often try to mold themselves into someone else, someone you were “always meant to be,” but ultimately never will, because the image you’ve created in your mind is completely fictitious.

Most trans people operate like this. Ime there are vanishingly few trans people who recognize that their sex doesn’t change and that they are ultimately still men or women. Most consider gender to be innate, therefore they were always actually men or women. Few acknowledge that it is basically a lifestyle choice. Honestly, a poor one at that, considering the adverse effects it has on your body and social life.

Some transmeds cite sex dysphoria as the reason for transition, but where does it come from? They often argue that transsexuals have brains that map out the body of the opposite sex and that causes the dysphoria, but there’s poor evidence for this. Ask a trans person how they knew they were trans and they will say 1) they always felt uncomfortable in their body/didn’t connect with others of their sex or 2) I’m a boy/girl but engaged in stereotypical activities of the opposite sex. It’s really just a bunch of made up nonsense to explain the suffering a lot of gnc, gay, whatever people experience.

A lot of trans people don’t realize that everyone else also has “gender feelings,” but they just don’t describe it with the language trans people do. Because of this disconnect, trans people often take this as evidence that their gender identities are real and infallible. But if you talk to, say, a woman who was very masculine as a child and didn’t fit in with girls, you will literally hear the same feelings of discomfort that most transmen describe. The difference is that these women grew out of it or learned to cope and accept themselves. Most transmen do not.

The conditions for trans identity to form are a combination of wrong place wrong time. I have a hard time not feeling sympathetic for the old fashioned transsexual types who recognize bio sex because I understand how debilitating dysphoria can be, but the religious mumbo jumbo speak of the modern trans movement is insufferable and harming thousands, if not millions, of people. It’s time to come back down to reality.

[x-v0id-x]

yaho! just discovered ur blog and omg i love ur sillies already heuhehheuheuheuehheee im so normal

what if ur ocs and darling go out in public, and when someone tries to flirt with them and darling just waltzes up to then all like "babe!! can we leave? i think we've finished everything we need to take care of here~" whilst giving the flirt a death stare teehee

Hihi!! Oh my goodness I’m super glad!! (n˘v˘•)¬ Being normal is in fact my favorite activity. But this is a great idea oh my gosh >w< 

Also I love your Shizuku pfp!! 

<3 This is so silly considering Milo and Kai are very aware of their surroundings nearly at all times. 

<3 Milo loves fashion, so they’d especially love going on shopping trips with you, which is exactly why you two were out together. But honestly they’d find any reason to get you to spend time with them (*-ω-)

<3 Honestly? They had seen that wretched person from a mile away. The second they got too close to you for Milo’s liking they were already thinking of all the different ways to make sure no one would find that body. However Milo doesn’t want to make their intent obvious, and of course they don’t want to scare you! Well at least not right now. 

<3 But then you completely dismiss the person! Not saying a word to them! Milo was only watching from the corner of their eye, so when they finally looked over, there you were in front of him!

<3 “Dear, I think we’re done here. Let’s leave, okay?~” Your voice made Milo melt every single time. 

<3 To say Milo was happy would be an understatement. Seeing you look at that person like the disgusting filth they were would honestly make them so giddy. You almost looked scary, if it wasn’t for how cute you were to them (つ∀<●) Though the thought of you being scary to him too made Milo go all pink in the face ♡

<3 They’d scoop you up and kiss you from your face to your neck, making sure to be as loving as possible in front of the person. I mean, it is their fault for flirting with you. They should’ve known better. 

<3 “Oh, of course, darling~ I’d want nothing more.” (ෆ’∀’ෆ) 

<3 He’d carry you all the way to the car, gushing about how sweet you were and how happy he was to have you, once you’re home they’re practically all over you for the rest of the night >< 

<3 Such simple things coming from you make Milo so happy（*’∀’人）♥

<3 Now Kaito on the other hand isn’t afraid to show this person what they’re messing with. 

<3 Kai isn’t one for going out often, but some new merchandise from a brand you really like came out, so of course he wouldn’t refuse going with you to check it out. 

<3 From the moment that idiot started to stare at you, Kai was already right behind you, constantly glaring back at the person. Though either they were too stupid to notice or too stupid to care. Either way it was not about to end well (^_^;

<3 But lucky them, you turned around, totally disregarding the person and now facing Kai. It was enough to make him pause and focus his attention on you. 

<3 “Babe!! We should go, I already checked out everything I wanted to see~” And you looked at the idiot with the meanest look Kai’s ever witnessed you have. 

<3 Kai had mixed feelings. On one hand he loved that you were shoving it in this bastard’s face that you were clearly with him. On the other hand, you focusing on that other person and not him was bothering him (❁≧_≦)

<3 You felt Kai’s hand on your chin, redirecting your head to look back at him, his expression the same as always. But there was a glint of pride in his eyes. You grinned back at him, leaning into his hand.

<3 “Whatever. Not buyin’ anything right?” You shook your head in response, and with that Kai grabbed your hand and began leading the way out. 

<3 Kai isn’t a fan of pda, but just before you left he made sure that fucker was watching as he kissed you against the wall of the store right before leaving (⺣◡⺣)♡*

<3 Once your guys were home, he wouldn’t let you out of his line of reach. You stayed in his lap the rest of the night while he held you close, his hands sometimes wandering below the waist (〃ω〃) But he wouldn’t do anything too big.

<3 Not unless you asked nicely ♡

[monocle-teacup]

Disclaimer: People may assume that I don't like the show going by the numerous critique posts I've made, but the reality is that if Season 1 didn't drop the ball so hard in the writing department ES would honestly be my favorite TF show. What I am is disappointed.

Something I've noticed is that every time an "ES is getting cancelled" rumor appears, Tumblr is pretty much the only place that has the "OH NO!" reaction. tfw2005 has some of that as well, but the general consensus at this point seems to be that the show getting cancelled is inevitable.

If you look at the threads on tfw2005 and the transformers subreddit dealing with the latest rumor, most people were more disappointed about Takara Prowl getting cancelled than the show itself.

The show already had so many things going against it: -Being on a streaming service that no one really has -Batch releases for episodes -The aesthetic alone made a lot of people avoid it. -Pretty much no advertising whatsoever -The toyline being regarded as terrible quality by mostly everybody -The Nightshade controversy. While it's utterly ridiculous this even caused such a stir, the fact of the matter is that the negative publicity actually made more people aware that the show even existed.

You know why I came back to Tumblr after years of being inactive? Because Tumblr was pretty much the only place where there was active discussion about the show while it was airing. tfw2005 also had discussion, but not like here. Reddit hardly mentions the show and I have no idea about Twitter/X since I don't use it. As annoying as the cancellation rumors are, it actually gets other parts of the web talking about the show.

When people say ES is popular, I'm honestly curious where they're getting that impression from. It's very telling that the teaser trailer for Season 2 presents a run of the mill TF story and doesn't mention anything from Season 1. The whole point of a trailer is to generate interest and Hasbro/Paramount seems to realize that Season 1 wasn't appealing to general audiences. In doing so, they pissed off a lot of the fan base the show actually has.

I'm still watching Season 2 because I'm honestly curious if the writing is going to improve and Weird Al and Flea are going to be in it. And obviously I'm hoping for more Mandroid.