#but genuinely

[starkidsupremacy]

[deathsbestgirl]

okay @calimanc i think i can finally do this!!

first, i tend to think of their relationships in phases. like:

season one: building trust and bonding. they genuinely like each other but it's a process! it takes time to create that bond & partnership. they really create such a good foundation naturally. they don't force it.

seasons two & three: BEST FRIENDS. they trust each other, they love each other, they rely on each other. their roles are set, their bond just gets stronger. season two really sets the tone for true friendship & personal value, not just work.

seasons four & five: it's a Struggle. their relationship is shifting but they're not there yet. it makes things hard but their partnership & friendship are solid. that is not the issue. (although, bad blood is also peak best friends)

season six: tension. surrounding their feelings, trust and getting their shit together lol (genuinely the season of them figuring it out)

season seven forward: THEY ARE IN LOVE. they are all in. s7 they're putting s6 lessons into practice, their communication is improving. s8&9 are hell for them but their love is never the question. coming back to each other is also a process (season seven is them putting the lessons into practice)

iwtb: married. everything is good & terrible. they are haunted, always haunted.

revival: coming back to each other, learning they can be together again despite everything. they never let go and they never will.

i think there's been a lot written about their characters and journeys, at least somewhat related to this. i think i'm recalling some of @randomfoggytiger meta posts about their different struggles, characters, trauma, etc. (the ones i think about a lot: scully teaches mulder to hug, milagro, how the ghosts stole christmas, mulder + s5, mulder / scully family in depths, mulder / scully typing, mulder / scully fight flight freeze — highly recommend, i think foggy puts a lot of things into words that are behind my reasoning)

in the beginning, mulder believes scully is sent as a spy. he's kind but he needles her about aliens, her thesis, her science and she gives back as good as she gets. but scully is so genuine and earnest. she cares about the truth and victims and justice. i've always thought she was excited to work in the field and specifically with mulder. whatever she thought of his spooky moniker, she also knew he was a brilliant man & a good agent. she was prepared to learn from him, regardless of what their cases would be. i don't think she believed all the rumors, i think she's intimately familiar with the rumor mill. and scully always had more of an open mind than anyone gives her credit for.

SO she spends the pilot trying to solve their case and get as much information out of him as possible, she wants him to trust her and she's trying to show him that he can. scully's got him chasing after her on their second? day on the case. she shows him real vulnerability, and imo, a tendency to believe despite her skepticism. and that's when he starts to give her a real chance. mulder's smile when she runs into his arms says sooooo much. AND THEN!!! he is vulnerable with her. he tells her about samantha & it's all he cares about. and she takes him at his word.

to me, this is something that sets the tone for most of their relationship. scully follows him because of his passion and belief, because she believed him when he said the truth was out there. she accepted that work was what mattered most to him and despite her crush, she chose to stay and follow him. she makes that decision over & over again. even when he makes her crazy, even when he gets himself into insane situations. and season one is all about building their trust, radicalizing scully. already before the end of season one, they trust only each other. mulder may show that trust slowly, taking bigger chances with her as time goes on. sharing the personal, letting her know about his informants, introducing her to his friends & eventually deep throat...he listens to her advice, her skepticism, her science and he genuinely appreciates it even if it frustrates him a lot. like when he thanks her in e.b.e., he's frustrated but it's real. he was listening. he recognizes her value to the x files and himself by season two. that conversation in sleepless about 'oh yeah, it's great. i don't know how i put up with you for so long' and 'i learned that from you' and 'i still have my work, and i still have you. and i still have myself.' and this is the "safe" territory for them. they know how to work together and they understand what that means. or they think they do, until scully is abducted and the stakes are raised. (kae wrote about mulder recognizing love in loss once. that's always really stuck with me.) mulder's guilt complex runs high. it's a huge part of his reaction in never again, scully's "my life" and 'we're not even going in circles, just an endless line' and "not everything is about you" is piercing in a very specific way to him. in that moment at the end, they choose silence and it persists for a long time. as does the way they talk around their feelings, their relationship. and mulder specifically is very avoidant. he makes several comments throughout their partnership about her leaving, not wanting to ruin her record or hold her back. and it's just so crazy, because scully eventually tells him that she holds him back, he doesn't need her. scully wants to be needed, and mulder wants her to stay but he 'doesn't want to see her hurt.'

the whole point is they put the work first, their partnership. it was a conscious choice. eventually we learn they both had relationships with people they worked with. i really do think it would make both of them hesitate to get involved with a work partner. generally speaking, scully is a "rule follower" but she doesn't have a problem breaking rules when she thinks it's justified, when she believes it's the right thing to do. no matter who's instincts she's listening to. that's a pattern we see very early on.

THEN they get so comfortable in their roles, believer mulder & skeptic scully, that later on as those things start to shift, they're afraid to change. mulder tells scully her science saved him over & over and in season six she clings to that (completely misunderstanding what he ~really meant, like kae talked about). season six is all about them figuring out what a relationship between them would mean.

but by that point, they had started to figure out some of their own issues. like in never again, scully is struggling with her patterns. so she does something she doesn't do often (i don't think one night stands are ooc, but they're not necessarily her norm. it seems like a periodic thing she may do when she gets That feeling.) scully needs to know she matters, she needs to see her impact. in never again, after paper hearts & el mundo gira, i think she's really hurting in that respect. she doesn't see at this point the impact she's had on mulder or as an agent. you can't tell she works in that office -- no desk, no nameplate, barely any personal items. just some books. initially, they're having two conversations and only partially aware of it. at the end, mulder doesn't seem to understand the issue, but at the end of leonard betts, mulder validates scully. verbally!! directly to her!! he starts to get it. they're not very good at talking directly, that's why never again and the cancer arc, and after, are so difficult. they talk about everything with metaphors, or they're okay sharing little pieces of them. their trauma & pain when forced to.

and season five is ... fraught. as so many other times, but scully nearly died and mulder feels guilty. randomfoggytiger talks about mulder in season 5 here. and the thing about these two, they're traumatized over & over again and they just keep going. but they are deeply affected. i've talked about how not okay scully is, and it takes her so much time to freely lean on mulder. she relies on him & their work, but she doesn't necessarily let him in too far. she holds people at a distance, she's so aware of loss & death and the effects of it, like she talks about in emily. and it isn't really that they need to work through their trauma. it's so much more about letting someone help shoulder the burdens, see them vulnerable. they do that and they do it for each other freely & often. but...for scully, she's always the strong one. she isn't really, but she thinks she has to be. she doesn't want to be another crusade for mulder, someone else he needs to protect. but at the same time, that's what partners do. she takes that "job" very seriously and so does mulder. (but so early on, it isn't because it's part of their job. i think that's extremely clear with scully in tooms & e.b.e., mulder's reaction in lazarus, to her abduction. you can see the progression so clearly.) but they can't protect each other from everything. mulder couldn't save her from being abducted, getting cancer, emily, or being burned alive...scully can't protect him from what happened to samantha. and that's a hard truth. it's something they accept for themselves as fbi agents, but is nearly impossible for them to accept for their partner. it's why scully threatens boggs, why mulder wants revenge on the men responsible for her abduction, why they go as far as they do for each other. they are relentless. (for mulder, he's always blaming himself. often, he wants to protect scully from himself even though he isn't the danger. he isn't the one harming her and he knows how far scully would go. like in endgame 'why didn't you tell me?' 'because i knew you wouldn't let me go through with it' and he runs off on his own because he doesn't want her to risk her life for his crusade, for the answer he needs & seeks.)

and season six!! it's so special because scully knows she's important, he gave her a whole speech about it. they nearly kissed. but they don't talk about it, the silence is maintained in favor of their partnership. and season six is a special brand of putting them in situations. at certain points, their partnership & trust are tested and leading up to those points, they tend to show how solid they really are. like in drive, when their communication is cut off but scully can understand that mulder is avoiding the police traps for a reason and he knows she'll catch onto the clues he manages to drop & that she's working hard to figure out the science/medicine, that she's doing the legwork on their cases that she always does. scully's asking him to get out of the car, but not to abandon it and they spend most of the season slowly putting together a blueprint for a relationship between them. knowing there are feelings between them, on both sides, completely reciprocated but it's a struggle. they learn something, and it's erased. or like the lesson in the unnatural, it takes a while for them to really get it. to put it into practice more consistently. there's a new freedom after one son too, with most of the syndicate killed at the hands of their own stupidity. and literally, neither of them can actually let go because the x files is both of their lives, they both have a very significant stake in the work and that will always connect them. (no matter how they're forced away from it at different points, no matter how they hesitate sometimes.) but it's also always deeper than that. because "you made me a whole person" wasn't just true of mulder. scully is never more herself than she is with mulder. i've said it a few times, but the x files was scully's dream job lol not only does she get to use everything in her arsenal, but she cares & she can be weird & a little mean. mulder gave her a very special kind of safety. scully loved teasing him for his beliefs, she always found it endearing and i just. think that's for a reason. he believes what she can't, and she believes what he can't. (you know, my usual)

i just think about the difference between all souls & all things. mulder is terrified of scully's believe in all souls, but in all souls, he interprets her words through her faith. he wasn't afraid. it was from a distance in all things, but she's also talking about a man she considered the love her life & might have married. but scully's sitting on his couch telling him all about it.

in the revival, scully comes back to the x files for mulder. but she's the one loving the case in mulder & scully meet the weremonster. and where mulder's disbelief & cynicism in the patient x/the red and the black scare her, she's not afraid of it weremonster. she kindly tries to guide him back to it, or rather, gives him the opportunity to find it himself. like he helps her light the candles & talks to god through her in nothing lasts forever. they're not really together but they're always together. it's always about working through something, understanding themselves & each other, and accepting/embracing some truth. like in all things, "what if there was only one choice?" in a way, there is only one choice. the one they made over & over. scully in squeeze & tooms & little green men, mulder in one breath & redux & requiem. all their choices lead to the other, and they almost mourn other choices. but scully would do it all again, she wouldn't change a thing. mulder can't do it alone and there's hope. the truth they both know. the only one they know.

[kittyphoenix12-xx]

when have billy fans done anything other than love argyle wholeheartedly?

[yetanothermcsideblog]

I don’t normally compare fandoms but I love how unhinged Minecraft/minecrafter lore can get like. “Yea fuck you this is Grian he’s a god but he’s also a chicken he pissed off a goat human creeper hybrid person who grows tomatoes in a pit the size of a country also he toys with death” or “hi this is etho everyone loves him nobody hates him he’s from Canada he invented redstone but he learned everything about redstone from a guy who invented a trading card game in minecraft named Vintage Beef who used to be a skinless flesh creature until he became a butcher.” Idk sometimes the best lore comes when you don’t try

[elmoshipsbyler]

not to say that i was media illiterate before, but getting invested in byler, and joining the ST tumblr fandom, has taught me so much about media analysis in such a short amount of time

like the fact that tumblr is the perfect platform for sharing thoughts, and the fact that when we theorize together it’s basically just one big brainstorm

all of that has taught me 1. how to notice/pay more attention to details, 2. how to analyze those details, and 3. how to develop, formulate, and present an argument

i’ve learnt so much from the coolest people, all while laughing at memes and having fun

stranger things fans are so amazing and you’re all so smart and sexy and cool

[shkika]

I am so morbidly curious about how your NSH x Moon shipping works, like, is NSH an absolute goofball and she just lets him cause chaos, or is she one to keep him more in check? I love them both to bits and want to know your interpretation of them! Also I have to say, the shipname Lilypad for nsh and moon is adorable and I like it very much

AH LILYPAD!! Thank you!

NSH is let to do as he pleases he's a goofball that likes messing with people, but is mature enough (usually) to not go overboard.

Moon thinks hes pretty entertaining. With them I just... see them as such strong presences in their cycle to cycle errands. Their mere presence just comforts them. One is always there for the other, they make sure that's very clear to the other and that just doesn't change. Ever.

NSH is also the guy to make sure she sits her butt down and gets her feelings out or just enjoy playing some games together! (kind of a rare thing to do between iterators i imagine honestly, who has the time ur supposed to be productive)

Moon also has the great scary secret that she looks all busy and proper 90% of the time, but NSH is around. He knows. Most of those essays are about scav behaviors not grand problems. but shhh

[wingstsworld]

one thing i completely had blocked out of my memory from the jily/marauders fandom (but am now remembering as I am once again hyperfixating) was the feeling of going from Joyous Adorable Fluff fics based on taylor swift lyrics to Absolute Crushing Despair when I remember their canonical lives and how FUCKING SAD IT IS.

[notnights]

Toy Story: Sid was so evil!!! Switching out his toys’ body parts!!!

Actual toy collectors:

[blaineskindagay]

It’s always so weird telling people that I got free MCR concert tickets because my uncle who lives in Australia knows Frank Iero. Like, that sounds like some bullshit a kid in year 7 would make up to sound cool

[delta-romance0]

I wanna know where mikey got the recipe from because that is not the family secret.

[sweetest-honeybee]

Tumblr this is not fuckin. A texting app what

[apollos-boyfriend]

godddddd every time i think too hard about mianite and ideologies i just turn to mush. it’s so good. the deconstruction of good vs evil ideologies is SO well done i could literally talk about it for hours. there is no black and white. the fucking twist of mianite being the bad guy in season two will forever be one of the top cinema moments ever. because order is creation, right? order is for good guys. it keeps people in line and society running. but it also keeps people in line. it silences and stifles and is unyielding in its control. order is not truth. chaos is not lies. you can obscure to keep things in order just as much as you can revolt to uncover the truth. the concepts themselves hold no weight. it is only when someone decides to wield them that they gain morality.

and balance? justice? that is never for just the good guys. it’s teaming with the bad guys to keep the number of players on the field even. it’s creating chaos when things are too put together. it’s fighting for whatever the losing side is, no matter their ideologies, because there is no justice until there is balance. you cannot have a just fight when you outnumber your opponents 10 to 1. your narrative morality doesn’t matter. balance is not neutrality. it is not inaction. it’s taking action where action is missing. it’s filling the void created by others. and by god do i not think of these lessons every waking moment.

[dduane]

This is just to say

I am reopening the sale that I posted about here last week & previous and which many of y’all liked the idea of and bought our whole ebook store for very cheap Forgive me for thinking maybe some people might have missed this bargain last time

(...and also @petermorwood’s goddamn superannuated Android tablet is driving me AROUND THE BEND and I frankly wouldn’t mind being able to buy him a new one)

...so please

and thank you

buy our whole store

for $44

...So the EVERY24 discount code is alive again for the next (checks watch) 26 hours (until noon tomorrow US EDT, Jul 25th). Knock yourselves out.  :)  (This page has the discount laid in for you: that discount manifests when you click through to the checkout page.)

...Thanks again, all! :) (Except, alas, UK people, we can’t sell to you and I wish we could. I’m so sorry.)(mutter)

[todomitoukei]

"Omg Endvr lost an arm and wants to continue to see Touya!!"

ok, well Compress lost an arm months ago AND sacrificed his ASS on purpose to protect Touya and the rest of the lov

So I don't know why people are still talking about Endvr when my man Dadpress is right there somewhere making us all wait for his big dramatic return

[maxphilippa]

I DŔEW MEPHONE4 SERVING CUNT SO HARD HELP

[sicklyseraphnsuch]

Listen, I've done higher ed and let me tell you, academia is full of nothing but constant criticism and challenges - and not all in good faith

I mean, you have to defend a thesis during your PhD and youre not defending because everyone only has compliments for you - and given Simon's subject of study? I bet his thesis defense was rough

So to me, I find it perfectly in character that Simon finally starts turning his life around when he gets the first bit of constructive criticism. (actual good faith criticism thats not "you were better before")

I feel like a lot of Simon's Ooo life (again 12 years!!! thats half of some of your lives to put in perspective) - all that time was because no one could give Simon the guidance he desperately needed. Finn with his "vault" never faces his grief. And Marceline who could've - Simon never talks to.

Remember when Marcy got a wake up call about how dumb she's acting when Glass Boy started singing about his princess - And Marcy realizes (no spoonfeeding necessary!) that she sounds so immature for pulling that on PB

Simon needed something like that. He's the kind of guy who would see a criticism in good faith and apply it where sensible. I don't think it's out of character for him to use that as a way to move forward - because for once people are telling him how!

here's a hard lesson I learned recently: pointing out where you did something wrong is not automatically you being blamed for that wrong thing happening - i think the key difference is when people blame you, they want you to feel bad - its a punishment, but when theyre pointing it out to help you, then they want you to feel better

and theres really no avoiding making mistakes - sometimes its the only way someone can learn

It's been more than a decade for Simon, we are past "I'm sorry for your loss", we are past giving him space, this man needed an intervention and you know what! interventions are rough! sometimes the greatest kindness that can be done is not letting people be comfortae in their own sorrow! which means helping them will be uncomfortable!! maybe even for all parties involved