#but i am so positive that we were not getting 12 hours to sleep when we did the middle school thing (11-14)

[deservedgrace]

i was thinking about the sleep deprivation thing that cults do and something i completely forgot about with regards to that conversation is that the sleep needs of children/teens are different to adults. it's a range as most things are, but when it comes to sleep you HAVE to go based off the biggest number to ensure everyone gets proper sleep because you cannot function properly without proper sleep

so, if you were a teenager who went to church camps and they allowed for less than 10 hours of sleep, or if you were a kid (6-12) and they allowed for less than 12 hours of sleep, you very well may have been sleep deprived, either intentionally or unintentionally

and as a little bonus: adults tend to respond to sleep deprivation with tiredness, but kids tend to respond with hyperactivity, and even one night of sleep deprivation can affect someone

[wonuwonder]

01:12 am - jeon wonwoo

sorry if there’s typos or it’s written weirdly, it’s my first public work and english isn’t my first language hehe

genre: fluff, slight angst (they’re fighting)

“baby please, just listen to me”

“no, wonwoo, i’m tired of arguing about the same thing everytime”

wonwoo had just gone back from “work”, you’d been waiting for hours, as you were supposed to go out tonight. this was -of course- not the first time this had happened and you’ve had enough

“it’s like what? the third time we have to reschedule because you can’t make time for our things?” wonwoo tried to answer but you stopped him before he could get the words out of his mouth- “i’m exhausted wonwoo, i don’t wanna deal with this right now” you made your way into the kitchen to get away from him, and wonwoo tried to grab your arm to stop you but you were quicker

“the funny thing is I would understand if it had been something important like practice or a meeting, but no, you went out to eat and drink with the boys, while i was here waiting for you with that stupid dress on”

he took a step closer to you and grabbed your wrists gently, but you stepped back, making your way towards the couch “please just go to bed wonwoo, my head hurts and i wanna go to sleep”

he snorted a laugh mockingly “like what you’re gonna sleep here in the couch?” you gave him an annoyed look and kept rearranging the cushions to make it comfortable, he got closer to you but you turned your head away “please baby let’s just talk i don’t wanna go to bed with a heavy heart”

“i don’t wanna be in our room right now so you can take it” you answered the first question completely ignoring what he had just said and he just kept looking at you with a sad face “just go”- you repeated, and he turned around and went inside your room with annoyance

—————

it had been two hours since you and wonwoo last “spoke” in the living room, he hadn’t been able to sleep at all just thinking about you and what he had done, he hated fighting and arguing with you.

the night was cold, and he knew the only thing you had to cover up with was a light couch blanket, so you were probably freezing in the living room, he got up, weighted blanket in hand and went to check on you.

he tried not to wake you as he opened the bedroom door, he got close to the couch and haunched to look at you better, you were sleeping in fetal position trying to warm yourself up with your own body, but he noticed you had goosebumps from the cold, so he quickly covered you with the blanket and you twisted softly in your sleep, he moved your hair out of your eyes to look at you better. he felt terrible for making you wait again.

you started to softly open your eyes as your body noticed his presence and when he noticed his eyes softened “hey baby, did i wake you?” he asked softly, and you shook your head humming a “no”, you shifted noticing the blanket and gave him a knowing look with a disguised grin on your face “i couldn’t stop thinking about you and thought you must’ve been freezing out here so i brought it to cover you”-you stopped to look at him- his hair was messy and he was wearing a pair of sweatpants and an old black tshirt to bed, he didn’t have his glasses with him so you could see his dark eyes shining better with the dim light that came from the streetlights. you stretched your hand out to cup his cheek and he closed his eyes instantly, melting into your touch.

“i really missed you today” you said softly, his eyes opened, and you noticed they were watery “i know baby”- he grabbed your hand and squeezed it- “i truly am sorry, i feel terrible, i hate making you feel like this, i just- they wanted to go and celebrate dino’s recent release and i thought i would be able to arrive in time for you and i-“ you cut him off “shh it’s okay baby, you don’t need to explain anything, let’s just forget about it” you gave him a quick peck “let’s just sleep” you opened the blanket and motioned for him to get in “squeeze in, i’m freezing, and i can’t sleep if i’m not hugging you” he laid next to you in the couch and hugged you tight resting his chin in your head.

“i’m sorry y/n, i love you”, he said and you looked up at him, “it’s okay, i love you too”.

author’s note: posted a new drabble!

kitchen talk (fluff, smut, wonwoo x reader)

[dilemmaontwolegs]

The Aftermath || LN4 {12}

Pairing: Lando Norris x widow!reader Summary: daddy!Lando struggles with balancing work and parenthood Warnings: 18+ only, fluff, mentions of pregnancy and birth WC: 2.3k

F1 Masterlist || One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven || Eight || Nine || Ten || Eleven || Twelve || Thirteen || Epilogue

Lando was uneasy as he made his first appearance for the new race season, arriving in Bahrain alone. He could constantly be found on his phone, distracted, and every spare moment he had was spent on a facetime call to you. 

“Good morning, love. How are my favourite girls?” he asked quietly as the video connected.

You smiled at the sight of your husband and panned the camera to the newborn asleep in the crook of your arm. “Missing daddy.”

“I miss you too.” The exhaustion in his blue eyes faded as he watched his daughter’s chest rise and fall for a few moments. “She looks like she’s grown.”

“You’ve only been gone one night, Lan,” you chuckled softly. 

“It feels like more.” He took a seat on the bed in his hotel and leaned against the headboard with a heavy sigh. “I thought I would actually be able to sleep through but I kept waking up because it was too quiet.”

“If it makes you feel better, I was the same,” you giggled. “She slept for a whole four hours straight last night but I still woke up after two. My boobs were huge by the time she woke up for a feed.”

“Pics or it didn’t happen.”

“You have a million pictures of my boobs on your phone.”

“And I want one more. I miss them too. And your lips, and your neck, and your thighs, and your-”

“I get it, you miss me,” you laughed, accidentally waking Renleigh. 

“Hi, princess, it’s daddy,” Lando cooed softly as her eyes fluttered open, giving him a peek of the blue irises they shared. “I wish I could hold you and give you the biggest kisses.”

He clutched the necklace hanging over his shirt and his finger ran over the engraving of her name and the date she was born, only six weeks ago. Those six weeks had gone by so fast, it was almost unbelievable. Everyone said that children grow up so quickly but he hadn’t believed it until in the blink of an eye he was packing his bag, leaving you and Renleigh safely at home. It felt like only yesterday he had held her for the first time.

“What am I doing?”

You knew he hadn’t meant to ask that aloud but you humoured him anyway. “Exactly what we planned. Four more sleeps and you will be right back where you belong, baby.”

Lando groaned at the thought of another four nights sleeping apart but he knew it was safer for Renleigh at home. The thought of bringing her to the races where thousands of people roamed the paddock induced panic into him and he took a shuddering breath. “I don’t think I can do this,” he whispered.

“Yes, you can,” you assured him, shifting Ren on your shoulder so you could talk to her and he could see both of your faces on the small screen. “Your daddy doesn’t know how to give up. He never gave up on me, even when I pushed him away, and he never gave up on us when everyone told him he was crazy. He is the bravest man I know and you, my darling, are so lucky to have a daddy like that.” 

Lando blinked rapidly as his eyes started to water and the visible relief shimmered on the surface of those tears. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

Renleigh started to wriggle and grunt until you moved her to your other shoulder. The change in position must have been exactly what she needed as her body tensed and a horrific sound escaped her onesie. 

“Little lady!” Lando gasped before chuckling. “I’ll let you go deal with that, love.”

“Thanks,” you drawled as you rolled your eyes. “I’m keeping a tally of all the diaper changes you have missed so you can catch up when you get home.”

“That’s fair,” he agreed with a laugh as he wiped his eyes. “Are you sure you’re okay on your own? If you need a break just to catch up on sleep Maria said she can be there in a few hours, mum too.”

“I’m alright at the minute, Lan,” you said with a little smile to Ren. “It won’t be long before we have to share her with the world, I’m savouring these moments.”

“Okay, but call me if you need anything. There’s more diapers in the garage and the groceries I ordered should be delivered this morning-”

“Lando, relax, I’ve got things locked down here,” you assured him one again as you heard the doubt creeping into his tone. “You focus on your job.”

The tv was playing quietly as you saved time and multitasked, folding the washing on the sofa while your foot gently moved the baby rocker where Renleigh slept. You just finished folding the latest load of baby clothes when the Formula One theme song began and you sat back to see what media day would bring.

A key turned in the front door before it swung open and Max waltzed in with his arms full of grocery bags, his eyes lighting up as he saw the new opening video start. “Hey Mama! Made it just in time,” he said with a grin as Lando came across the screen. “Oh, there’s our boy. Looking dapper, ol’ Bob.”

“Hey Max,” you greeted as he walked by to the kitchen. “When Lando said he had ordered groceries, I didn’t think he meant he ordered you to get them.”

“He probably didn’t want anyone seeing these get delivered,” Max said as he unpacked the bags and lifted up a pack of breast pads to frown at them. “What do these even do?”

“Catch the milk that leaks.”

His nose wrinkled and he dropped them back down. “That actually happens?”

“At the most inconvenient times too,” you muttered wistfully. No one told you that getting aroused could trigger a letdown, but you and Lando certainly found out the hard way before he left. Thankfully Lando was Lando and he found it hilarious, laughing it off to save you from utter embarrassment. 

“You’re really not selling this baby thing for me,” he stated as he tossed a tube of diaper cream over to you. 

“I’m sorry, what I meant to say was…those are just nipple pasties and my body hasn’t completely changed since I pushed an 8lb human out of my-”

“Yeah, yeah, okay, I get it.” He shivered at the thought and finished his unpacking before dropping down into ‘his’ chair and stealing the rocker away from you. “It’s not as glamorous as I imagined, but she’s pretty cute. Aren’t you, sweetheart? Wake up for Uncle Maxie.”

You chuckled softly as he unbuckled her and picked her up, but she slept as heavily as Lando and didn’t even stir. 

“Have you spoken to him?” you asked as a clip of Lando signing autographs for fans came across the screen.

Max’s lips turned down as he nodded. “He’s struggling.”

You sighed and turned the volume up as the interviews started to begin. “I don’t know how to help. If I say I’m fine without him it makes him feel like a spare part and if I say I’m not then he worries even more.”

“He just needs time to settle into the change, especially before the news breaks.” Max looked down at Ren and grinned. “You are going to break the internet, yes you are.”

“I’m surprised the secret hasn’t already come out in all honesty. Lando isn’t exactly good at keeping them.”

“This is different though, it’s for your guys' privacy. But it was funny to see you sneaking around under baggy hoodies, can’t do that now that the weather’s warming up and she’s on the outside.”

“I was incognito!”

He looked like he was going to argue before he pointed to the screen and you saw Lando in front of a Sky News reporter.

“Welcome back, Lando, how was your winter break?”

A bright smile lit up his face and it felt like it was just for you as he stared down the camera lens. “It was the best one yet.”

“Your social media updates were noticeably empty of your wife and we haven’t seen her yet around the paddock. Is she well? Is everything alright?”

“She’s good, really good.” His nervous mannerisms started to leak through as he scratched the back of his neck before fidgeting with his necklace. “She wishes she could be here. She has something more important happening at the moment to make any of the overseas races but they’ll come to Imola.”

“Whomp, there it is,” Max chuffed as you both heard the slip up.

“Maybe they missed it?”

The droll stare he gave you showed just how little he believed that. “Yeah and I’m a unicorn.”

“There was that one time,” you pointed out, reminding him of the time Lando and Mila had drawn on his face while he slept. “It was a dick on your forehead, not a horn, but it’s really the same thing.”

“They?” the reporter prompted, the microphone pushing even closer to Lando’s pink cheeks.

“I…uhh…”

You bit your lip as your husband grew more uncomfortable and you pulled your phone out, knowing he would answer no matter what.

“One sec,” Lando said as held up a finger and stepped back from the mic to answer. “Hi, love, everything okay?”

“Are you?”

His sigh was answer enough and you saw him comb a hand through his curls. “I think we need to change strategies. I fucked A up.”

“It was an accident,” you said softly. “That’s why there’s a plan B. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

“Now go on, you’ve been itching to post it for months.”

Lando was smiling as he ended the call and walked back to the reporter with his phone in hand. “So, they,” he stopped to giggle with excitement. “That would be in regards to this.”

Lando turned his phone to the screen just as he hit post on the Instagram picture, sharing your news with the world. Going on your honeymoon for two weeks had been sublime but what you had returned home with was even better.

“Congratulations! Any hint as to the due date?”

 “I think I’ve given you enough already, haven’t I?” he shot back, still riding the high of adrenaline after posting the picture. “But we would really appreciate some privacy, I can’t exaggerate it enough. If you see us on the street, I’m happy to sign autographs and take a picture with you but please respect my family and only take photos of me.”

“He’s jealous of sharing the attention,” Carlos called out behind him. 

“Yeah, that’s exactly it, you caught me.” Lando immediately covered his crotch as Carlos passed by and tried to hit him in the nuts. “Ah, no, stop that, I want another kid or two before you damage them.” 

“That’s news to me. My stitches have barely healed and he wants me to go through that again.” Max looked at you confused. “It’s called an episiotomy, look it up if you want nightmares.”

“No thanks.”

You were wearing the rug thin in the living room as you impatiently waited for Lando’s return. You had paced back and forth for an hour since seeing Lando’s plane land on the flight radar app. Ren was tucked snugly against your chest in a baby wrap and had quickly fallen asleep with the rocking movement but you started to unwrap her when you saw the pair of headlights coming up the drive.

Renleigh wasn’t too happy at being woken up but you softly cooed to her as she settled back down, “Daddy’s home, baby girl.”

It took a moment for him to see you as he came in from the garage, his suitcase trailing behind him. Dark circles surrounded his eyes and he pulled his cap off as he walked through the doorway, combing a hand into the curls that had been flattened.

“Hi baby,” you greeted when he spotted you in the dimly lit living room despite the late hour. “You didn’t think we would miss your homecoming, did you?”

He crossed the room with a few long strides, his suitcase clattering to the floor as it was forgotten, and he enveloped you both in his arms. “I missed you,” he repeated over and over as he kissed your lips and then Renleigh’s forehead. His eyes fluttered shut and his face relaxed as he buried his nose in her hair and inhaled deeply like he had forgotten her baby scent. “I missed you.”

“We missed you too,” you said as you handed Ren over. “Someone is ready for bed, and I think her daddy is too.”

“Yeah? You want daddy to put you to bed?” he asked as he nuzzled her nose. “One more minute, I need my cuddles first.”

He took a seat on the couch and settled Renleigh on top of his chest as they both yawned. “I can’t wait until you are bigger, baby girl. It breaks my heart to be away from you and mama.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat as you sat beside him and draped your arm over his shoulders, combing your fingers through his hair. He hummed softly as you massaged his head and you felt his head growing heavier as his whispered conversation grew quieter. A soft snore finally escaped and his head rolled onto your shoulder as the exhaustion from his travels won and you kissed his forehead.

“It breaks my heart too.”

Click here for chapter thirteen.

Tagging: @yunnie-f1 @neiich @zendayabelova @stillbreathin @dr3lover @writerscurse @christianpulisic10 @alwaysclassyeagle @alexisquinnlee-bc @purplephantomwolf @lightsoutletsgo @pleasantducktimetravel @pierre-gasllllllyyyyyy @holy-macncheese-balls @belennasif @ophcelia @love4lando @ryiamarie @mickslover @tyna-19

[eggroll-sama]

Heyyyoooo

Just a thought, how long do you think mc was asleep/unconscious in kuras' clinic?

They couldn't have been out in the fogfall for too long since they didn't die of blood loss (or maybe they just can't 👀)

I just found your acc and I can't wait to binge read your masterlist :)

-egg anon

Hi egg anon! AHHH, thanks for your ask, it’s my first ask I’ve ever gotten for Touchstarved ToT. I hope more people would slide into my DMs, I really don’t mind since I’m in a massive TS brainrot at the current moment. Now then, let's get right into it. Btw I don't have any credentials to show for the research, all from Google baby.

Warning: Mentions of blood, graphic violence

I’m going to say that MC was roughly out of commission for 10-12 hours.

When MC gets their first look at the city of Eridia, it's dusk, stars in the sky, the moon rising from the east, and the horizon a reddish glow. It can't be sunrise because scientifically colder temperatures make the sky less red and orangey during sunrises. There isn't any verbal indication what time it is, but we can predict it was 6-8PM when the caravan was attacked by the Soulless. Eridia seems to have a maritime climates: cloudy weather, frequent rainfall/precipitation, and mild temperatures, like IRL Ireland, Scandinavia, Belgium, and the 6-8 PM time frame is usually when the sunsets for those regions. Let’s choose 8 PM.

Now as for how long MC was in this position is interesting. When Kuras found us, we were barely clinging to life, face-down in "murky, shallow water." MC is really lucky that they survived because an infection in the wilderness greatly increases your mortality rates. We can at least thank the Soulless' sharp claws for slicing the arm clean off since if it was an angled, ragged cut would increase blood loss. I have heard of survival stories of people angling their arms towards the sky to decrease blood loss, but no, MC's body was half-submerged in water. If MC is really a half-Monster like some theories suggest, than there's a possibility they are more resilient, lasting one to two more hours, compared to the avg humans that can die in less than five minutes. That could be why Kuras is so fascinated with you too, not just for the cursed arms, but there was almost no way you could've survived with all the odds against you. I also don't think we stayed out there longer than one to two hours because an amputated arm is only good for four to six hours before you can reattach them. And considering Kuras' eldritch instincts, I can't see being out there for longer than two hours max.

So let's say Kuras finds MC around 9-10 PM at the wastes. He takes them to the clinic and reattaches the arm using his magic. We are then asleep overnight, approximately 10 hours, naked with only a cold linen sheet on a cot, before we wake up. Tbh I don't know which is worse: if Kuras left us there while we were asleep or just did paperwork while we were lying practically naked right next to him till we woke up the next morning. Good thing Kuras isn't a pervert (?)

(A/N: also not even a blanket??? Unless he was keeping the room toasty with his powers, thanks I guess, Mr Sunny D)

Why I think we were down for around 10 hours is for a few reasons.

Most obvious one: When we went inside the Wet Wick, MC mentions they were surprised at the amount of people when it wasn't even mid-day (12 PM). So maybe it's around 10 AM, maybe even earlier than that.

The impatient knock from the front door is an indicator that Kuras was taking longer than he usually did, but not too long for people to start yelling. Maybe his clinic has an official starting time, and so citizens wake up early to wait in line outside till it officially starts. But with MC taking up the only cot in the clinic and sleeping there for the entire night, he had to start a little later, hence people getting annoyed cuz they woke up super early to wait in line, but Kuras hasn't let people in yet.

MC got super hungry at the vendors, which makes sense since they haven't eaten for so long.

So yeah, this is all I've got for MC's timeline from when the Soulless attacked and when they woke up. I have read other theories saying it was Ais' who found us and brought us to Kuras' clinic which is an interesting take, but for the sake with what we are given for now Kuras was the one that saved you.

[dddevilsadvocate]

1. and now I’m covered in you

Leviathan x gn!AFAB!reader

a/n: here it is folks! the first chapter of the longest fic I’ve ever written. literally. 12 pages and counting. after the overwhelmingly horny positive reception on this post, I decided to split what I currently have into instalments and release them periodically as I edit them. there is no schedule lol I have ADHD and am also very not good at this 🥲

THIS IS VERY NSFW MINORS GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE

CW: self-indulgent smut (unprotected vaginal sex, dry humping, fingering), loss of virginity

midnight had struck well over 2 hours ago. RAD’s 8am start crept closer and closer, like a cat upon a mouse. like a threat. and though you were in bed, covered in blankets and surrounded by pillows, basking in the warmth of the body pressed against you, sleep could not reach you. there was no room for it.

the third eldest’s allocated “you” time - an entire 24 hours with you all to himself! - had started right as the new day did. at 0:03, you’d snuck into his room, where he’d been waiting like a lovesick puppy to show you what he’d done. he’d chosen a great movie for you two to watch; some niche title from his surprisingly robust comedic horror collection, apparently a Devildom cult classic. he’d even gone through all the trouble to have it projected onto his ceiling so you could easily see it from the comfort of his bed - which he’d rearranged into the perfect cuddle nook. snacks he’d fought to keep safe from Beel were laid out like a buffet. the lights of his tank were set to your favourite colour, casting a hazy glow over the space. 

everything had started innocently enough. you’d pressed your lips to his cheek, complimenting his efforts. he’d rushed to start the movie and practically dove into his tub, finally able to wrap his arms around you and rest his head atop yours. his chest rose and fell against you as he laughed at every slapstick gag, mandarin eyes sparkling when he realised you were laughing too. you don’t quite remember how he’d ended up under you, with his hands on your waist and your tongue between his lips, but you weren’t going to complain.

Levi had always been cautious of intimacy. he rarely went further than where he was with you right now, and even such familiar territory made him nervous. you feel the heat of the blush on his face as if you’re leaning over a fire. your kisses are sloppy, and his are desperate. his hands don’t dare stray from their places above your hips, but the lust he’s holding them back from sparks from his fingertips. he wants to let them roam. he wants to let then roam more than anyth-

CCCRRRAAASSSHHH

a sudden, violent rise in the movie’s volume comes like a bomb over your senses. you push yourself up from the demon, a scream tearing from your throat. Levi is just as startled; his eyes are wider than you’ve ever seen them as they study the room for the threat.

“AAAH WHAT THE HELL WAS TH- oh. th-the movie.” groaning, his head falls back against the pillow. “I completely forgot about that part… and that it was still playing…”

though your heart continues to pound against your sternum, you giggle. “my god.” running your fingers through his fringe brings his attention back to you. “we should probably turn that off and get some sleep now.”

you reach for the projector’s remote and click it off. but as you go to slide off the demon, his fingers suddenly dig into you. your shirt separates his skin from yours, but you swear you can feel the ridges of his fingerprints. his grip is somehow full of panic, like he’s worried you’ll float away. “w-wait! wait. can… c-can we keep going?”

you smile. you can survive tomorrow’s classes with no sleep if it comes to that. and if you’re honest with yourself, sleeping wouldn’t be nearly as fun as continuing. “of course we-”

“can we go further? maybe?” despite threatening to, Levi’s voice does not waver. his eyes - golden and indigo like the most vibrant of sunsets - dart between yours from beneath furrowed brows. 

the shock of the question does not strike you as hard as his confidence does. your relationship with Levi had never been consummated in the traditional sense, but he wasn’t a stranger to the concept. the rock of your hips always left him a babbling mess. your hands brought him such pleasure he only lasted a minute the first time. and your mouth? god, it was like he was addicted. you’d never heard him - or anyone, for that matter - make such noise while actively trying not to. and yet, as much as he enjoyed the acts as they were happening, asking for them activated his fight or flight. red-cheeked and stuttering, until you saved him with your overwhelming perfection.

you figured he’d get to this question at some point, but you never thought he’d ask it in one smooth go.

“you… want to go further?” you arch an eyebrow. “how much further?”

Levi’s gaze darts to the door. you made sure to lock it behind you at his request, but now he seems worried a brotherly ear or two might be pressed against the other side. he stares for a moment before glancing back at you, unable to meet your eyes this time. he studies your lips, your chest, your shoulders, before his voice drops to a whisper: “a-all the way?”

you open your mouth to respond, but the response doesn’t come. nothing you think of seems appropriate in reply. if you say yes, you’d be the first being to have ever done so. Levi had never even asked anyone before - a confession Asmo had once drunkenly given on the otaku’s behalf. the amount of courage it must have taken to verbalise the question, to venture so far from his comfort zone… your heart swells. the poor demon must be scared shitless.

you don’t even entertain the idea of refusal. of all the centuries he’s had to ask this question, he’s asked you. he wants you.

finally, you cup his cheek in your hand. “I’d love to.” his eyes return to yours, staring wide and glossy over crimson cheeks.

“r-r-really?!” his voice squeaks. his expression is pure disbelief, like he was expecting you to echo his signature ‘disgusting reclusive weirdo’ tirade and flee back to your own room. when you smile again, leaning forwards so your forehead is pressed against his, he inhales sharply and tightens his grip on your waist.

“I’d be honoured, Levi.” your lips brush over his brow, his cheek, his nose. “I’ll take good care of you. I promise. just let me know if you want me to stop at any point, okay?”

(read the next part here)

[boydepartment]

hii i’m here to make a request (omg i definitely didn’t tell u i was doing this)

could you write something about boyfriend hyunnie just comforting the reader when they can’t sleep, just lots of fluff and sleepy hyun maybe idk HAHA 🫶🏻🫶🏻 thank u ily <33

authors note: heheheheh ily soooooo much I got this

Kiss Me- Sixpence None The Richer

wc: 500

warnings: none

You found yourself once again tossing and turning, it started to become a normal occurrence lately with Hyunjin always getting back late from work. It wasn’t his fault and you’d never blame him, let alone tell your boyfriend about your sleeping problems coming up again. He’s known a little bit about it in the past but you’ve never made it a big deal.

Hyunjin was always very doting; you’re his world, so you telling him would make him feel bad. That would make you feel worst and-

Ugh… You flipped again and this position was somehow even worse than the last 50 positions you sprawled yourself out in. Taking a deep breath you looked at the time, squinting in the moonlit room at the old fashioned alarm clock. The little hands telling you it was 12:32, obviously am.

You sat up and took in your surroundings, your eyes were well adjusted to the dark by now due to trying to fall asleep for the past hour and a half. Taking a deep breath you stood up and walked to the living room. Flipping on the lights you screamed seeing a tall figure just standing there.

“BABY IT’S ME IT’S ME!” Your boyfriend practically hunched over and walked quickly towards you. He felt awful for coming home late again AND scaring the love of his life. Hyunjin wrapped his arms around you and slightly moved both of you back and forth.

“Oh! I DIDNT know you were home!” You spoke now melting into his touch. Your heart rate calming down at the sight of him. He wasn’t touchy with a lot of other people, but with you. Sometimes you’d have to pry him off.

“Chan let us out early.” He mumbled and nuzzled his head in your shoulder, “did I wake you?”

You shook your head no, “I’ve been up… I couldn’t sleep, I’m sorry.”

Hyunjin looked up from your shoulder, “baby why’re you apologizing? There’s nothing to apologize for.” He kissed around your face, trying to make you feel better.

You shrugged and looked away from him, you felt guilty for not telling him how much you haven’t been able to sleep. Hyunjin’s hand went to yours and he softly squeezed.

“Are your sleeping problems coming up again?”

You looked up at him somewhat in shock, “what do you mean?”

Hyunjin’s eyes softened, “when we first started dating and you mentioned your sleeping issues briefly, I took note of that. I also researched and maybe I asked your mom.”

Your eyes went from shock to pure adoration, “you asked my mom about it?”

“Well duh obviously if you have a problem I’m gonna ask about it.” He huffed and looked away, seemingly embarrassed. You let out a small laugh and put your hands on his face.

“You’re so sweet.”

He looked at you, melting instantly. You two always had that effect on eachother.

Any embarrassment he had went away. The only thing in Hyunjin’s eyes was love and care for you.

“I got you a couple things actually.” Hyunjin walked to his bag and pulled out a new blanket and a new book to read, “I wanted to make up for some of the late nights recently. Well and now scaring you really bad when I came home.”

You smiled and practically jumped in his arms, “thank you, this means a lot to me… you’re the best…”

Hyunjin let out a giggle and held you even with the stuff in his hands, “I know. Best boyfriend of the universe award goes to me!”

You pulled away and gave him a look which made him giggle even more.

“Let me shower and get ready for bed and I’ll join you.” He said softly, giving you a kiss on the head, and walking to the bathroom.

You made your way back to the bed and got under the covers with your new blanket, of course. Soon enough you heard the hairdryer stop and your boyfriend was skipping to the bed to join you.

Hyunjin was definitely SKIPPING too, you could hear it in his footsteps and it made you giggle slightly. He curled up next to you and put his hand on your waist.

“Flip over I want to talk.” He whined, you did so and looked at him.

Hyunjin was truly one of a kind. His eyes looked so pretty whenever he looked at you.

“Hi.” You smiled up at him, the bed wasn’t uncomfortable anymore with your other half laying in it with you.

“Hi.” He kept staring at you.

You helped pull the covers over him better.

Hyunjin smiled at you, “when you have trouble sleeping I read online that reading an actual paper book helps. And I bought teas a couple weeks ago that could help too.”

“You really did your research huh?” You yawned and stretched as much as you could with him engulfing you.

“Of course I did my research. I love you and want you to be healthy.” Hyunjin let out a yawn after you.

“I love you too… Can you tell me about your day?” You asked, laying your head on him more.

Hyunjin nodded, “yeah I can… so…”

As Hyunjin went on about his day, you felt your eyes become heavy. Although when he mentioned Jisung totally eating shit while walking down the hall, you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. As he talked his thumb would softly rub your eyebrow, the comforting action made you even more sleepy. You felt yourself feeling as light as a feather as you drifted off to dreamland.

“Goodnight my darling.”

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS ZERO Animate Tokuten Drama CD “A Vampire’s Late Night Snack Terror” [Azusa ver.]

Original title: 夜更かしヴァンパイアの食テロ飯 [アズサ編]

Source: Diabolik Lovers ZERO Vol. 12 Animate Tokuten CD

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Kishio Daisuke

Translator’s note: This has to be funniest ‘late-night snack’ CDs yet. Honestly big props to Azusa’s VA for pulling off those sudden changes in tone so perfectly. You can honestly always rely on Azusa to bring some top tier comedy to the table. Funny moments aside, this track was also very wholesome but I did not expect any less from DL’s very own cinnamon roll. 

*Rustle rustle*

Azusa suddenly appears behind you.

“The refrigator...is so cool and refreshing...”

You shriek and jump backwards.

“Ah...I’m sorry...for startling you...I could hear sounds coming from the kitchen even though everyone should be asleep at this hour...so I came to take a look...But I was surprised to find you here...”

You sigh in relief.

“You were cooling off, so I probably interfered, huh? It’s really hot and humid tonight, so I totally understand.”

You explain yourself.

“Huh? I got it wrong? ...I figured you were using the refrigerator to find some refreshment. Then what were you doing? Looking for leftovers from dinner, perhaps?”

You nod.

“I see. You’re hungry, huh...?”

You nod again.

“I understand. Kou and Yuma...raid the fridge all the time as well...But they always get scolded by Ruki for having no manners...He’ll get mad at you as well if he sees you. You can have breakfast once you wake up so...Try to endure it for now, and let’s head back to your room, okay?”

You shake your head.

“Eh? I see...I guess you won’t back down, huh? ...If you’ve made such a strong resolve...then I am in no position to stop you. ‘I shall have my midnight snack, even if I have to break the rules!’ ...Eve, if that is the path you have chosen in life, you have no other choice but to stick to it, regardless of the many dangers which may wait ahead!”

You ask if Ruki is that scary when he gets upset. 

“Exactly. You shall soon find out too, just how terrifying he can be. Who knows what kind of torture might await you...if Ruki were to find you...He might just lecture you for a whole day while you’re forced to sit still on your knees. On top of that, if you just so happen to doze off...because he uses so many difficult words...the period will be extended to two days...

ーーNo, he might not keep it at just that! He could even forbid you from eating for a whole week...or fold your clothes inside out on purpose! And when you wake up...you find those horrible green peppers all over your room. But when you try to leave, the door’s lock has been rigged with some kind of puzzle you can’t solve! ...I’m sure Ruki would do such a thing. ...Still, you choose food, even if it means making him your enemy, don’t you? ...Okay. If you have made up your mind, then I won’t run either...!”

You start to have second thoughts.

“Eh...? What’s wrong...?”

You admit to Azusa that you’re scared now.

“Huh? You don’t want Ruki to get upset with you? I see. In that case...Hmー That’s a tricky one...I don’t want you to have to go through such horrible things but...Ah! Right! I think Ruki might let it slide if you actually cook something? Then you wouldn’t be doing something rude after all! Besides, it’s much worse to miss on precious rest because you can’t sleep from the hunger! Mmh! Let’s say that you’re allowed to eat something, as long as you prepare it yourself!”

You still seem doubtful. 

“Don’t worry. I’m sure Ruki will understand as well. Besides...I’m kind of hungry as well. Can I join you for a late-night snack?”

You agree and start looking through the fridge.

*Rustle rustle*

“Fufu~ Hooray! ...But do we even have anything left? Everyone in this family eats a lot so...do you think you’ll have enough ingredients to work with...?”

You nod and close the fridge again.

*Thud*

“Eh? What is...that?”

You explain.

“Bitter...melon?”

You ask Azusa if he has never tried it.

“Mmh...It’s green just like peppers...so I haven’t really...”

You tell him it can be good.

“Is that so? If you say so...I suppose I can try a little...”

You tell him that you’ll make something with it.

“Mmh! I’ll help you with the cooking as well.”

*TIMESKIP*

*Cling cling*

*Rattle*

“Hm...Oh...You’re using a bunch of different ingredients, huh? This is...flour starch...”

*Rustle*

“And these are dried bonito flakes...Mayonaise and salt...”

You give him instructions.

“I just need to put them all together into a bowl? ...Okay.”

Azusa puts all of the ingredients in the bowl.

“Ah...Just a little bit of mayonaise and salt, right?”

He follows your instructions.

“About this much?”

 You nod.

“Mmh.”

*Thud*

“Now we add the eggs and a splash of water...Before mixing it well...”

Azusa adds the final ingredients before mixing everything up.

“Like this? Or should I mix it a bit more?”

You tell him it’s not quite right.

“I see...It’s difficult...Perhaps it’d be better to leave this part up to you...I don’t know how much strength to put in exactly...In return, tell me when it’s time to cut up the bitter melon, okay? I’ll try my best!”

You agree.

“Mmh. Good luck.”

He hands the bowl to you as you start mixing.

“Ah...Just as I thought, you’ve got the technique down. Just watching you makes me feel everything will be alright.”

You ask him if he sometimes feels worried when watching someone cook.

“Yeah. There’s been times where I’ve been stressed. I’m never worried when Ruki is the one cooking, but when it’s Yuma or Kou...watch out.”

You raise a brow.

“When Yuma makes dinner, he cuts the vegetables too big, so they’re never cooked all the way through. After starting from scratch several times, I guess he got irritated, because he just flipped over the pot. As for Kou...the kitchen was a mess. It doesn’t matter what he tries to cook, it always ends with a disaster. But the worst part is...Ruki who explodes after witnessing it.”

You flinch.

“Mmh...It’s horrifying...So try to avoid being there when it happens, okay?”

You ask Azusa about his culinary skills.

“Me? I’d like to think I’m a decent cook but...The last time I made something, everyone complained about the flavor. The others go way too light on the chili pepper. It’s so good though.”

*Thud*

“Your hand stopped moving, by the way. Are you done mixing? What’s next?”

You explain.

“My turn, right?”

*Rustle rustle*

Azusa grabs the bitter melon and rinses it with water.

“I need to cut it into thin slices, right? I’ll cut it the exact size you want.”

He grabs a large kitchen knife.

*Cling*

“Fufu...This knife looks...very sharp. Haah...Oh...But...I’m sure it’ll cut even better if I hone the blade...I’m sure it’d feel great to effortlessly slice through meat or vegetables...Fufufu...”

You tell him there’s no time for that now.

“Eh...? You think so...? If you say so, I’ll do it some other time, okay...? Well then, I’ll start cutting, okay?”

Azusa cuts the bitter melon.

“Slices of one milimeter each...”

*Chop chop chop chop chop*

“Hm~ Did I do it right?”

You are very impressed with his knife work.

“Fufu~ It feels nice to get praised by you. Is there anything else that needs to be cut?”

You ask him to cut the meat as well.

“Okay. The pork belly needs to be cut in thin slices of about one centimeter.”

*Rustle*

“And you want the fried tofu chopped up in cubes of around five milimeter...”

*Chop chop chop chop chop*

*Rustle*

*Chop chop chop chop chop*

“Here you go. All done.”

*Clap clap clap*

“You’re making me blush with all those compliments...But I won’t deny that it makes me happy. Should I add these to the bowl from earlier?”

You nod.

“In that case...”

Azusa adds the ingredients to mix.

“Now we mix it well, right?”

He mixes it up.

*Rustle*

“Huh? A frying pan...? Are we going to...bake this perhaps?”

You explain.

“I see...I think I’m starting to picture it all together. Let’s see...I have to pour it in bit by bit, right?”

*Pshhhh*

“Like this?”

You nod.

“Fufu~ We’ve got a bunch of mini okonomiyaki. (1)”

You start flipping them over.

“Oh! It’s perfectly browned on one side already. So that’s how you get it to bake on both side...”

*Pshhh*

“This scent...That’s sesame oil, right? Seems very rich in flavor and delicious...”

You turn off the fire. 

“Done already? Fufu...That was quick, wasn’t it?”

*Dun dun dun*

“...A bitter melon mixed-bake. It smells nice but...I can’t help but think of green peppers when I look at it.” 

You tell him that he doesn’t need to force himself to eat it.

“No...It’s okay...If you’ll have some...I’ll challenge myself as well. Uhmー I guess I put on some of this ponzu sauce over here?”

He prepares himself a plate.

“Well then...Time to dig in. Aahn...”

*Nom*

“Ho..Ho...Ho...Hot!”

Azusa swallows it.

“Oh...Delicious...Mmh...”

*Gulp*

“I guess it’s because we cut it up so finely but...It’s not bitter at all.  You get a nice burst of flavor from the meat as well...and a nice texture.”

He continues eating.

“Mmh...Mm...So good...”

You have some as well. 

“Fufu...Fufufu...You seem to be enjoying it as well. Ah! I’m sure this would go great with chili pepper as well!”

*Thud*

“I suppose I’ll try sprinkling some on top. ...Ah.”

He puts it away again.

*Rustle*

“No, nevermind.”

You seem surprised.

“Mmh. I want to enjoy the pure flavors today. ...We made this together after all, so I’m sure this is its optimal taste...”

Azusa continues eating.

“The next time you get hungry...Let’s make this together again, Eve. ...Ah! But we’re keeping it a secret from Ruki, okay?”

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Okonomiyaki is a thick, savory pancake with various types of vegetables and meat/fish.

(2) Ponzu is a famous Japanese dressing or dipping sauce, somewhat similar to soy sauce but with mirin and citrus added to it.

[whoreforharleezy03]

the Harlow household 🫶

warnings: talks about IVF if you squint, mostly fluff

summary: it all started when...

a\n: this is my first story about the Harlow's and i want to write more about them. This is kind of just so you can get to know them and everything, hope you like it! (also y/n has no race so it could be anyone! But her pronounce are she/her, if you want me to make a fiction with other pronounce dm me 🥰)

This is also kind of short but whatever 😌💅

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you found out that you were expecting you were quite suprised. You and Jack weren't really trying but you guys weren't preventing it, you just didn't think it would actually happen.

You decided that you wanted to suprise your husband by setting up a box and putting a little onesie with your pregnancy test in it.

But when he came home, you got too excited and didn't waste any time.

"I'm pregnant!" you said, trying to hide the happy tears in your eyes.

Jack just stared at you, having no idea what to say or do. 

Your excitement went down, thinking he was disappointed.

"Are you mad?"

Jack looked at you, still no words coming out of his mouth.

Until he finally was able to form a sentence

"No, no, I just wasn't expecting that. I'm just in shock."

Then it finally hit him, he was going to be a father.

"You're pregnant?" he asked

You nodded.

"Y/n, you're actually pregnant?"

You nodded with more excitement.

"I fucking love you so much." He said as he pulled you into the tightest hug.

That was the day your life would change forever.

-

Your first pregnancy was tough, you had mood swings all over the place, your morning sickness was terrible, you had heart burns and swollen feet. But Jack loved all those things about you.

Jack knew it was going to be a girl from the start, so it was not a suprise to him when the cake was revealed to be pink. 

On January 24th you went into labor after being 8 days overdue. You were so relieved to finally get to birth that damn child and stop being pregnant, but little did you know you ended up to be in labor for 38 hours. It was a nightmare! When you wrote on your birth plan that you wanted an 'all natural labor with no epidural' you weren't expecting to be in labor for 38 hours?!?

Poor Jack had to suffer too

"I SWEAR TO GOD WE ARE NOT GETTING ANOTHER ONE"

Was a quote you said often, or-

"I AM GOING TO RIP YOUR FUCKING BALLS OFF"

You also used.

Jack had never in his life been more scared of you, the poor man was just trying to give you the ice chips you asked for.

On January 26th 12:01 AM, you had a beautiful baby girl. 

You two hadn't really thought of a name that much, or- you had talked about it often, you could just never agree on a name.

But looking at her, the name just somehow came to you.

~Amani Noelle Harlow~

-

Children really do change you. A year ago you were problably drinking with your friends or having a romantic night out with your husband.

Now you two were sleep deprived with a one year old and probably haven't showered in two weeks.

Amani was looking more and more like Jack over time.

Her freckles were getting more noticeable, her curls and her eyes were becoming just like his.

She is truly his doppelgänger.

-

When Amani was two you found out that you were pregnant again.

Now this time you were trying.

Jack sat there with you on the bathroom floor, waiting for a positive answer after many negative ones.

You didn't understand why and how you got pregnant when you weren't trying but now that you were trying, God doesn't let you. You've been trying for months and you had almost given up. You had been starting to think about IVF but decided to try maybe a few more tries before deciding to go on that difficult road.

But after that three minute timer, expecting disappointment when you would look at the test result it turned out to be... positive?

You were shocked, Jack cried, you hugged. You were reliving the same best day as three years ago.

Your second pregnancy was way easier. Of course you had morning sickness but not like when you had your first.

-

" Dad, do you also have a baby in your belly like mama."

" No.. why? "

" Oh, then you're just fat. "

Amani's personality was definitely shining through.

She was sassy and determined. She went by her own rules and didn't listen to anybody else. You could say that all those traits came from her mother.

You were due on may 8th but you went into labor on april 16th and had her at the 17th of april at 3:07 PM, this time you only had to suffer through nineteen hours of labor instead of thirty eight.

You decided on her name probably a month before she was born, and Jack liked and agreed on the name-

~ Ayla Adele Harlow ~

-

Now two years later you are so happy that all that happened.

With your loving husband, your sassy five year old and your shy two year old things couldn't be more great.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Okay so this is NOT my best work but like i said this is just kind of an introduction to this series so please feel free to send requests 🫶)

[swampstew]

The time Raven almost became a statistic

Ok starting off to say that I am home and safe. Currently boiling myself in a bath to sluice the grime off from the last few days because What. The. Fuck. A rollercoaster of bullshit. I'm legit concerned a curse was placed on me but the egg test said that's not it. The Vibes are WACK.

Story of how I'm pretty positive I was going to be robbed and/or worse - details below the cut. Trigger warnings for: drug use, dangerous situation, cop involvement, nothing HAPPENED to me but it sounded like it was being actively planned out right in front of my door in the middle of the night.

For reasons I won't disclose, I had booked a motel for a few days to clear my head (first mistake), and while it wasn’t the nicest, I was willing to overlook the gross things in order for peace and quiet. That lasted 14 hours.

Between 12-5 am, I was up late writing my OC fic and people kept walking by and standing around outside my door, not at all trying to quiet their voices so I could hear pretty much everything, and I was hearing really alarming shit that sounded like my door had been watched all night to see if anyone came out or when the light over my window would go out, money issues and just shady shit. During a short period where it got really quiet, I noticed that the front door had an unusual hole in it that gave a direct view of my room. I didn't dare go outside to check the other side, but from my view, it looked like a peep hole that could be uncovered from the outside. Que covering the hole with heavy objects and stacking the door shut.

The people outside kept coming in waves where they would just talk really fucking loudly and then it would quiet down, I tried to play it off as people in the pool area. Until. I frequently heard people say that [someone] should already be sleeping, arguing about the room overhead light being on (I had pushed the curtains down so any gaps into the room where hidden, only one I couldn’t get was the gap up top that showed a quarter of the ceiling which is right next to the overhead light), what sounded like them trying to hype themselves up to do something, and then the last thing I heard was someone trying to convince everyone that the light was left on and that they should just do it. I called the cops. I told them not to knock on my door or talk to me unless they felt like my life was in danger.

Cops knocked on my door.

They had dispersed a crowd from the parking lot right in front of my door. Lot of people with known drug issues lived there and had a habit of disturbing people at the motel while tripping. Told me the area was not safe, that most people had scattered when they showed up but that there were people still lurking around. During that, someone from upstairs tried to come down and look into my room through the open door and I quickly shut it and the cops forcibly moved them back upstairs. They said they’d stay for a few minutes to clear out the rest of the stragglers but if I kept my door double latched, I should be fine. Y’all I fucking barricaded that door through the use of physics and home alone trappery.

Called my bf to stay with me cause I felt so unsafe. He raced over, stayed on the phone with me the whole time while I barricaded the door again and packed my shit because he was not having it. He threw my stuff in his car, escorted me to my car and stayed until I locked the door and put it in reverse, then had me wait for him to drive his car so I could follow him.

We get home and he told me that when he got to the motel, there were very few people there, cops had already left at that point BUT - two guys were in a Uhaul across from my room that left as soon as he got there (that Uhaul was not there when I checked in that afternoon), and that the few people hanging around outside were all standing in areas with direct vantage points of my room.

It's not even been a full 24 hours and I'm still shaking like a chihuahua but I am safe. Ordered a stun gun and self defense classes. People fucking suck.

I've accepted I'll probably post the fic tomorrow or super late tonight but its fucking crazy that if I had not been up writing a tense, fight scene and gone to bed, I could have been hurt or worse. One Piece continuing to save lives, praise be!

[bylerschmyler]

I know that frame by frame analysis are not 100% reliable cause some things can really be production errors but I found something interesting about another time fuckery.

If we believe Jonathan's watch it's about 01:20 AM when they go to sleep after the UD/Demogorgon situation in the woods.

If we believe the alarm clock on Nancy's night stand it ~9 o'clock (PM).

I know that the alarm clock is a very background Details. But the fact it's in the shot is giving me headache. They could have easily cut out before it was shown or hid the pointers better. But they didn't they showed us the alarm clock and then cut.

But let me give you perspective on this.

Logically speaking it's way more likely that the alarm clock is right. Why?

Well Nancy just had a fight with her mother because she came back after 10:00 o'clock a couple off days prior when she was at Steve's party. Them being home very late only a couple off days later especially when Nancy tells her mom that she thinks something bad happened to Barb is not very logical. I know that the Wheeler's aren't parents that really know what their kids are doing. But considering the general situation I doubt that Nancy would have been allowed too late again.

On another note we see Steve stopping by.

Yes obviously that was before Nancy even went under the shower. But I doubt that Nancy went to the shower hours after getting home. And doubt too that Steve, Carol and Tommy are out until 12-1 am just driving around. I could be wrong but even after Steve's party the were home sooner (I think). But I could be wrong.

But still I think the alarm clock has a more realistic time than Jonathan watch.

So Jonathan's watch could just be wrong?

Yes but that's very unlikely (imo)

They showed us the watch in the center of the picture and while it's blurry you can't dismiss that you can easily see the time. The thing is that especially with Jonathan the Duffers like to hide the pointers off his watch. I am aware of multiple shots were Jonathan's watch has no pointers (or at least seems like that). And also it would have been easy to hide the watch.

Just take a look at the shot with the alarm clock again.

A few moments before he move to his side Jonathan is lying on his back and could have slept in exactly the same position like did when we can see his watch. But rather than doing that and therefore most likely revealing the time fuckery he move to his side an very obviously hides his watch from us.

Also you can see what I mean when I say sometimes Jonathan's watch doesn't seem like having pointers some times

@aemiron-main @henrysglock

For your collection of timeline fuckerinos

[cowboyjen68]

Hey Jen.

I’m really quite lost at the moment. I live in aus and have moved to 3 different states in the last 4 years due to my wife’s work choices/changes- aussie states aren’t so close together so as imagined when we move I lose any connections I may have had. I desperately would follow her anywhere- each move has been on a whim for a job offer of hers and I always say yes because.,well..I can’t be the reason she doesn’t chase a career, right?

Last year we moved somewhere new, she worked long hours and it took me about a month before I started work myself. She was off early, home late. Weekends etc etc. she complained a lot about not having friends and formed a friendship/mentorship with a younger (straight) woman she employed that I encouraged and was so supportive of.

Fast forward 6 months later, things in our relationship were different. She was doing sleep over shifts at work, we weren’t intimate, when she was home and we were in bed together she was restless while she slept. One night she came home so drunk. It didn’t feel right. I did an unforgettable thing of looking into her phone and she had downloaded an app that she was messaging this colleague in that automatically deleted every 24hrs. The messages there were..at the very least to say explicit. They also said things about me basically meaning nothing to her, to top it off.

I woke and confronted her that night. I subsequently packed my dogs and car and drove the 6 hours home to my family. The next day when she woke up she practically just started with blaming me. She kept asking me to go home to talk about it- I told her that she should want to fix this, and be chasing me. That there shouldn’t even be a conversation. But she went to work and..well, didn’t. Then she threatened suicide, which she had done in the past and also attempted and told me what she was doing. I was terrified, so I returned. Then we just…went on with it. She gave me kindness and softness and was accepting of the pain she cause for a short while. I told her I couldn’t stay in that town and so she gave me that, and we moved.

12 months on I’m still with her, but I’m not healed. I think I might have the opportunity to be healed but anytime something increases my anxiety and I verbalise it, she tells me “It wasn’t even cheating/ I don’t think about it/ you need to get over it”. She works away for work a bit and last week ghosted me for 5 days. She came home and told me how much I’d ruined her life/that I’m exhausting and my need to be reassured isn’t her job. It was nasty. It was devastating. She just kept telling me I need help. I desperately told her I need her help but she just tells me I’m manipulating her. I so inherently care about what she thinks and want to please her that I did go to a Dr and have started anti depressants. It probably is necessary, because I am destroyed..but it’s just another face of blame from her and telling me it’s me and I’m listening to her. My self esteem is so low I can’t help but listen to her.

And I’m still fucking here. We have been together 8 years. She is my entire world. I don’t know what to do, how to cope, without her. I don’t want to. But Every time something happens, I see so much her unwillingness to give me the support I need. My family are telling me to go home. I am about 50% there with making that decision…the pathetic part is that I know if I leave, she won’t chase me. She will just move on, and I don’t want her to. I want her to fight for me and I’m not sure I would be able to cope through her not doing that for me (pathetic, right?) even though I know that shows me what my decision should be.

I read my message as I’m writing it and I know the advice I would give someone in my position. But I just can’t pull myself out of my head and this cloud of what I envisioned our life together to be and I’m just stuck. The last 4 weeks she has been away 4-5 days per week for work, and I’m just here in this new town, in this new state, alone and envisioning every scenario and I am going insane. I am absolutely an introvert and really struggle connecting with people and anytime I try I always feel like a burden and that my personality isn’t received well and so I don’t try again. I just am so lonely, and devastated and lost. I’m in my 30s and feel like I should be better at all of this by now.

I don’t know if I’m asking how to connect, or how to leave. Or just how to find peace or comfort when your world has disappeared around you. I know I have privilege in having choices, But that doesn’t stop it hurting any less.

I stayed married for 17 years which was about 14 years past the expiration date of our love. I stayed to make sure she was cared for by my wages. I agreed to kids knowing I should have said "no" but it made her happy. Looking back we were often barely friends let alone in love. I desperately wanted her to passionately love me and i think she tried to do that. In the end we were both frustrated and miserable.

I say all that so you know I have some frame of reference to wanting so bad to be in love that I compromised intimacy, passion, fulfillment and life goals in order to try to make things work.

You are not alone and it is such a common experience for lesbians and bi women to stay in less than stellar relationships because being alone is more scary. We are convinced by society and even our own LGBT community that our dating pool is so small that we must hold on to what we can get because it might be our last and only chance for love/relationship.

Some of us like the IDEA of being in a relationship more than we like the actual relationship. Again, this one can be blamed on our own community because we hear length of a relationship equals value. If we fail we aren't "living the lesbian dream". I have learned longevity does not equal quality. Some of my shorter relationships have been much more fulfilling for both parties than my longest one.

You absolutely deserve to be loved equally and share passion of the same intensity as your partner. Staying with some one who requires your constant effort to convince them to love you is never worth it. Think of all the time you have wasted wondering where she is, what she is doing, does she love you? Total that all up and figure how that energy could be put into fostering friendship or romance with someone who welcomes it. OR focusing on yourself and what makes you happy.

If all this is not enough to convince you to break clean here is one last reminder. Anyone threatening suicide to control your actions or emotions is abusing you. Don't put up with her for another second. You deserve better. Much better.

[princessproductivity]

These two mistakes are stealing your time... (They were stealing mine too!)

It can feel so disappointing to have a plan for your long-term goals written out and still feel like you are unable to achieve everything. I promise I've been there. There were two key mistakes I was making that were leaving me feeling overworked, and underproductive.

Mistake #1: Sleeping in.

I love being awake early... but I hate the act of actually waking up early. The relief that comes with knowing I'm up hours ahead of time, with plenty of wiggle room in my morning to get a head start on the day is amazing. All of a sudden, I realize my morning rush out the door doesn't need to be so stressful.

Sadly, that relief never makes the 5:00 AM alarm any easier.

The problem is that late nights lead to late mornings, and all too often I found myself rushing out the door unprepared for the day as the result of the previous night's pleasures and an extra hour of sleep. Don't get me wrong, it can feel great to sleep in on the weekend, but as my day has become less structured around a set "day job" schedule and more self-directed, I realized just how harmful the habit of sleeping in can be for an entrepreneurial lifestyle.

Many studies have led to the conclusion that our best ideas occur early in the morning and that we miss out on our most critical growth opportunities when we sleep in. I'm not saying that the early mornings are fun... I am saying that they are worth it.

Mistake #2: The cost of sacrificing high amounts of time into low-reward ventures.

As an entrepreneur, I understand the importance of casting one's net far and seeking new opportunities to learn and grow. However, sometimes your time is more valuable than what that opportunity itself may have to offer.

I recently accepted a minimum wage position (my first in years) on Saturdays, helping the owners of a small-town thrift shop set up their online sales channels. I didn't need the money, but I figured it was a great opportunity to explore online sales further as I had some experience with it already, and I loved the idea of helping another small business get off on the right track.

Unfortunately, I quickly learned that the two women who co-owned the business were not on the same terms about what they wanted long-term from the venture. Both had their own successful businesses on the side, and this little thrift shop was more of a hobby venture than one they truly wanted to see succeed.

Ultimately, it came to be that neither of them truly knew if they wanted an online sales channel at all! The six hours I spent there every Saturday was valuable time that I couldn't get back. While the idea of helping another business kick off was appealing upon a first impression, I realized that my time wasn't worth minimum wage in a place that clung to stagnation instead of capitalizing on new growth opportunities.

There will always be more opportunities than we can take — make sure the ones you do take are worth the time you will never get back.

What is the 12 week year? 7 ways to organize your life... 7 ways to reduce your screen time...

[copiousloverofcopia]

The next chapter of Death & Flowers is LIVE!

Thank you all so much for your love and support! I am truly grateful to you all!

Please if you like my work, reblog!

Death & Flowers

It hadn't been serious; it never was with him. While Papa was suave, and Ollie enjoyed their time together it wasn't meant to be. She knew it wasn't something meant to last…something permanent but—here she was. It was only one missed pill and life forever changed.

Chapter 12: The Time Has Come

Also available HERE on AO3! Haven't started yet? Start from the beginning HERE!

Definitely NSFW below the cut!

The night had been met with unbridled passion. A course traveled like the words of a poet—fully felt and beautifully lyrical. Lovers held tightly to one another on their way to ascension. All rushing to the end where their bodies begged for release as they embraced in the darkness. The whole night Copia and Ollie reaffirming their love. 

It was no wonder that when Copia’s eyes began to open in the later afternoon that he still felt completely exhausted, but so in love.  He rolled over to see Ollie sleeping beside him. A smile on her face and a calm about her that he hadn’t seen in such a long time. It was at that moment he knew everything between them was going to be ok. More than ok—they were in it for the long haul. 

He went to sit up along the side of the bed. Careful not to disturb her rest as he went to stand up, stretching out a bit before noticing the late hour of the day. Shit, Copia thought to himself. He was due at practice with the ghouls in just over an hour. The whole day had been lost to them in their much-needed slumber. 

“Cope?” Ollie yawned, noticing he had left the bed.  Quickly feeling the chill with the warmth of his body leaving its place beside her. 

“Oh amore…I am sorry did I wake you?” he asked her with a smile. 

“No…no… I was already getting up.”

“Liar.” Copia chuckled, sure she had been completely passed out before he moved. 

“Hmm.” Ollie hummed, acknowledging her playful little white lie with the shrug of her shoulders. Copia, lamenting with a smile. 

“Well then…” he continued on, “...as much as I could stay lost in those very convincing eyes Ollie. I am sorry but I have to get going. Seems we have been out most of the day, it’s already 2.” 

“Oh my. You aren’t going to get in trouble are you.” she panicked, trying to pull herself up in the bed, a spark of nervous energy running through her.  

“Shhh…no no. I’ll be fine, just need to make sure I don’t miss practice is all. The ghouls get a bit rowdy if left to their own devices for too long amore. Especially Dew.” Copia laughed. Ollie nodded at him and Copia turned to make his way across the room for the shower. Before he could take a step, Ollie pulled back on his wrist. Copia stopped and turned back to face her. 

The way she looked at him, so loving and sweet. Eyes sparkling up at him from her position in the bed. Copia couldn't help but notice the curve of her body silhouetted in the sheets. The desire began growing inside him. All of it had sent Copia’s blood pumping. “Really, now?” he asked her. 

“Now.” Ollie demanded pulling him back on the bed. Their lips, meeting instantly as they clamored together to remove the treacherous sheets that lay between them. Copia hovered over Ollie, keeping his weight off her belly as they continued to kiss.

Her lips, so soft and needy—showering him in kisses. Copia's hand tangled in Ollie's crimson hair, holding himself up as best he could on his elbows. Copia knew he would disobey Lucifer himself if his reward was to spend one more moment inside her. One more moment where they were as one. 

Copia pulled away a moment from her lips, both of them breathless and yearning. His hands, slowly making their way down her neck and over her soft breast. Copia began gently kneading it before sitting up on his knees over her. Taking his already hard cock in his hand and beginning to stroke himself as he gazed over her. Ollie wrapped her legs around him, trying to pull him closer to her. 

She let out a desperate moan as she felt him begin to rub himself through her slick. The head of his cock, nudging against her entrance. Both of them, on edge, waiting for the moment he would slip inside her. Her body melted beneath him as he pushed himself carefully inside her. 

Copia’s mouth fell open as he slid into her. His hips rocking and his pelvis, gently thrusting into her with fervor and intention. He wanted her to feel every vein, curve, and surge of blood through his body. Reveling in her core pulsing around him.

"Oh Cope…you feel amazing. Don't stop. Ah!" Ollie mewled, breathy and languid. Copia thought she had never looked more beautiful. Her hair sprayed around her pillow, eyes closed, and lips parted in ecstasy as he took her.

"Amore. I won't stop…not until I've made you cum. Not until I've made you mine once more." He grunted, trying to hold back his own release–teetering ever so close to the edge. Ollie gripped his ass, helping force him deeper inside. Biting her lower lip as he filled her, over and over again with his girth. The slight curve of his cock guiding the tip in the spot that made her see stars. 

Her grip tightened up into him and Copia grew concerned it was too much. Slowing his pace a moment and asking, "Are you sure this isn't too much? I am not hurting you?" 

"No…it's not. It's good…oh Cope it's so good. You feel so good inside me. Mmm...please don't stop. Make me cum like you promised." She begged, allowing one of her hands to slide up through the thick layer of hair on his chest. My fingernails scraping the flesh and sending a chill through him.

It was then Copia could feel it. Her core began to squeeze down harder—rhythmic and tight all around him. Her breathing hitching and finally a rush of warmth flowing out between them. Copia, holding on to Ollie as he came. His lips pressing against her forehead as spilled himself deep inside her. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was worth being late, Copia had thought while he made his way down the corridor. Freshly showered and ready for practice—and only 15 minutes late. When he arrived at the Great Hall where practice was held, Aether was waiting for him outside the doors. A concerned look on his face and the distinct lack of sound coming from behind him. An eerie quiet, when there should be instruments being tuned.

It made Copia weary, wondering if something had gone wrong. Things had been going too well lately he thought to himself. Between Ollie’s improved health and how well the remainder of her pregnancy seemed to be going to the reassurance of their love, and finally with the lurking danger that constantly loomed over them falling quiet. Something felt as if it were too good to be true and Copia felt like he was waiting for the other shoe to fall.

“Cardinal.” Aether began, watching the concern washing over Copia’s face.

“Si Aether what is it? Why is no one practicing yet?” he asked the ghoul. Aether glanced around at the siblings that passed them. Drawing closer to Copia as he spoke.

“I told them you canceled.” Aether replied as Copia’s eyebrows raised high on his head. Aether could almost see his blood flowing faster, increasing with his anxiety and frustration. 

“You what?!” he exclaimed. Aether quickly grabbed him, pulling him just inside the doors of the Great Hall. The two of them, standing alone in the empty room. Aether began whispering so that the room need not echo his words. 

“Cardinal. I overheard Sister Imperator and Mr. Saltarian…not too long ago as I was bringing something to the main office. There was an exchange…something about the ghouls being to blame for something…I tried to listen in but their words were too soft to make out the rest and then they headed up to her office so hastily you’d have thought the Abbey had caught fire. 

“What are you saying Aeth?” Copia asked, trying to wrap his head around everything. 

“I don’t know what's going on Cardinal, but whatever it is I know they have to be up there discussing it right now in her office…and if anyone would be able to figure it out—it's you.”

“Me?”

“I heard from Cumulus that you and Sister have a special relationship.” Aether said plainly. Copia’s face grew pale as he swallowed back. “If they are planning on pinning this all on us Cardinal—like Alpha has been saying…we deserve to know. Please.” 

“I see.” Copia replied. He could see the pain and fear in Aether’s eyes. It was true that Alpha had been suspecting that there were those within the Ministry that conspired to blame the ghouls for the deaths of the Emeritus sons. Was it really Sister—his own mother? Was Mr. Saltarian also in on it? 

“Please Cardinal. I beg you as my friend.” the ghoul’s eyes pleading. Copia put his hand on Aether’s shoulder and smiled up at him. 

“Aeth…I’m on my way now.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Copia made his way to Sister’s office. The door had been left open–only slightly. The light from inside cascading a sharp slice of light onto the tile floor as Copia approached. At first, he could hear them, Sister and Saltarian arguing almost loud enough to be heard clearly at the top of the stairs, but as he reached the door the noise seemed to dissipate like smoke. Only a lower hum of conversation noted between them. 

“You have made a lot of questionable decisions in your life Elizabeth, but this one is the absolutely worst.” Saltarian snapped as Copia tried to get as close to the office door without arousing suspicion. 

“Heh…is that so? It was a mistake to tell my own son I am his mother.” Sister snapped back. 

“That’s just it. Because you couldn’t keep your mouth shut now and your legs closed 50 years ago now, we must all pay the price for your incompetence. 

“I beg your pardon. I will have you know you aren’t exactly the saint you claim to be either.” Sister Imperator said, furious with Saltarian’s frankness and disrespect. Though it was something she had come to expect in this situation. 

“I am not even angry that you told him about you. I could care less if he knows you carried him. What ENRAGES me Elizabeth… is that you told him about his connection to Nihil. We have come so close to being done with them. The reign of the Emeritus line is over, after everything that's happened, and you want to throw away that opportunity away. An opportunity that was bestowed by Satan, for some maternal bonding with your and Nihil’s bastard.” Saltarian fumed, slamming his fist down on the desk before rubbing his eyes in frustration and anger. 

“I will tell him to keep it to himself. We can trust Copia to do what is asked.” Sister assured him.

“Oh, I know we can. The reason I agreed to help you, help him ascend has EVERYTHING to do with his ability to do as he is told. He would have been a great face of the Papacy while we handled things behind the scenes…but again you have compromised everything! Who knows who he has told things to already before you decided to let me in on it!”  he barked again. Before Sister could get out another word, Copia accidentally rested too close to the door, causing a creak to interrupt the conversation and immediately draw attention to him. He knew whatever he was overhearing them speak on now—that conversation was over.

“Who’s there?” Sister Imperator called out. Copia quickly came peering into the room and tried his best to pretend, behave as if he hadn’t heard a single word of any of it. 

“Ah Sister, Saltarian. I am sorry to interrupt, but I just wanted to stop by and let you know I canceled practice today. Ollie was not feeling the best and I thought it best to remain by her side…” he began in his most convincing tone. Copia’s hand, still holding on to the door and ready to leave with the things he had learned tucked away. 

“Oh of course Copia. Family comes first.” she replied, glancing over at Saltarian. 

“Absolutely…please Cardinal, sit. Sit.” Mr. Saltarian insisted, gesturing for Copia to sit beside him in the pair of chairs that sat in front of Sister Imperator’s desk. Copia did as instructed. Another knowing glance sent back over from Saltarian to Sister—a reliable follower of orders he was indeed. 

“Thank you Mr. Saltarian..oh?” Copia began only to hear a knock at the door from behind them. Within moments, three men entered the office. They were only vaguely familiar to him but all men he had seen before in passing. 

“Ah yes. Right on time. Please gentlemen come closer.” Saltarian beckoned them towards the desk. “Cardinal I…ah…don’t believe you have all officially met.” As they approached Copia’s nose was overwhelmed with the scent of juniper and cypress. It lingered heavily in the air around them and seemed from the clothes of one of the men who stood directly behind him. The man’s large hands gripped to the top of Copia’s chair. The smugness and lack of decorum immediately made Copia uneasy, but he tried to pretend he didn’t notice it. 

“Oh si, I do not believe we have.” Copia responded as he rose from his chair to face them—eye to eye. He saw that the man behind him was tall with brown hair. He had a scar over his eyebrow and donned blackened paints around his eyes. The others were painted the same, but both were slightly shorter and had longer, darker hair that was tied back in pony tails. All of them dressed in traditional black vestments and zucchettos atop their heads. 

“These men are Bishops Mauro, Martin, and Henry.” Saltarian began, naming them left to right. Copia, realizing the scent was coming from the one he named Martin.  Copia nodded to each one of them as they bowed towards him in a show of respect. The Cardinal could feel the tension in the room—something wasn’t quite right about them, but he couldn’t place his suspicions. 

“Pleasure to meet you all. I am Cardinal Copia.” he introduced himself but somehow, he knew that the three men already knew who he was, nodding and looking back at Saltarian. 

“You asked to see us, your eminence.” Bishop Martin spoke. His voice was low and commanding. The men seemed almost militant, like some sort of security for Saltarian, but for  what reason Copia was unsure.

“Well pardon my rudeness Mr. Saltarian, Sister, Bishops—but I must be going. I have a practice to reschedule.” Copia stated, trying to find his way out of the room as swiftly as possible. 

“I thought you canceled to spend time with Sister Olive?” Saltarian asked. The rush of anxiety spread through Copia instantly and he hoped that his face did not betray him. Had he already forgotten his cover story?

“Ah si, well she is resting peacefully by now so I think I should try to take advantage of the time before you know we have—” Copia began before Sister cut him off.

“Of course, C. Please go and practice. We need you at your best for the tour and the days are numbered as you know.” she explained. Copia swallowed back his nerves, nodding to her and the men and leaving as calmly as possible. 

As he walked down the hall, Copia tried steadying the beat of his heart. He had clearly heard something he was not supposed to in the exchange between Sister and Saltarian. A plot to take over the Papacy? Using him to control things? Why would his own mother agree to this and what about Nihil and the ghouls? Where did they all fit into this? 

Even more concerning to Copia, was the men Saltarian was surrounding himself with. How were they involved? Copia knew he needed to tell someone what he heard. The mysteries kept piling on and Copia was beginning to wonder what was going to happen when all that hid in the shadows would finally come into the light.

[hyperbolicgrinch]

Im baaaaack 😈 Turnabouts fair play babe! Let's goooo !

1, 5 11, 12, 16, 22, 27, 29

🩷❤️💛❤️🩷

(don't ever stop!!!!!! ilysm!!! (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)) (i did this instead of crying so forgive me for the mess?? 💓)

1. the last sentence you wrote -

woe, paragraph be upon you instead because that sentence alone would kinda be nothing???:

The waves are singing against the Sunny and the weather is kind. The crew lingers, their own ways to spend the day drifting on the breeze. The world won't go still, but it does, mercifully, slow down. His laughter trails off into deep, even breaths as he falls into a dream larger than you could ever know.

(messy messy messy but the zolu came upon me in the early hours and it had to go somewhere. 🤡) (ignore the second person, sometimes i have to start fics with it and then switch everything to third person later when i have a grip on it. i do not know why. 👐)

5. first sentence of the fifth paragraph of an unpublished WIP -

whelp, just have the whole paragraph again cause might be more mid otherwise, asdsfh:

There was another universe where, instead, Law gave in and headbutted him. Sent Eustass stumbling back, wiping the blood from his nose as he straightened from his recoil. Where they made eye contact as Eustass summoned whatever metals lay around the port and Law finally unleashed everything crushed inside his ribcage. Where they fought each other like they were taking down Emperors. Where their crews wasted themselves to get them free of each other.

(i don't know how I feel about it but hey, it's a wip for a reasonnnn. we edit for a reasonnnn. 🙈)

11. a WIP you’d like to finish someday -

not fanfic, although i have many of them i wish could see the world, but i'd love to finish my werewolves in space wip. it rattles around in my brain constantly and the actors my mind cast for the main roles are inspiration alone. i am easily spooked by my original works tho so god only knows if it'll ever be seen. 🥲

12. a trope you’re really into right now -

finding each other in every life (whether familial or platonic or romantic or anything else). it helps me sleep at night. 🥺

16. favorite place to write -

in my bed, just before going to sleep, with something chill on the tv. the words flow better there. it's peaceful. 😌

22. do you ever worry about public reaction to what you’re writing? how do you get past that? -

yeah. but also no, not really. by the time i'm in a position to be worrying about that, i've put so much effort and time into the thing that my delight at posting it, shuts off most of the bad what-ifs. i've been real lucky and only ever had nice experiences so far too. if i do worry about it before getting there tho, i hit up my sister or my other hype men and let them distract me from it with their biased povs. 😂

27. your favorite part of the writing process -

just the writing and editing in general, i guess. like when everything is starting to sing and you can add details and hidden gems. when you have a hole and you suddenly know how to fill it. matching words together that compliment each other and let the sentence paint the picture in a fun way. when the ideas elaborate on themselves and i just have to be the bricklayer. it's just really pleasing and calming when a piece starts coming together and you are running down that hill with all the momentum. 💪

29. how easy is it for you to come up with titles? -

90% of the time? too easily. i normally have a title idea before i start writing or just after. or there's something i wrote and when i am reading through later & i see it, i go: "👀 free title real estate mayhaps? 👉👈". at the moment i have like two to three titles for all my fics and works in progress and could come up with more without being threatened. 😂 i'm going to have such a hard time of it when i have to decide. 🫠

thank you for sending me some bangbang!! 💕💕 i'll try to get to the other ask soon. 🫶

[pbandjesse]

I would like another day off. Today needs a do over. I am still so tired. And I am dreading going back to camp and that sucks. That does not feel good. I hope that I can feel more positive when I get there. But today could have been kinder.

I did not sleep well. I really struggled to fall asleep. I was in pain for a while and wasn't feeling good. So it was not the most restful evening.

I woke up at 730 and texted James to make sure the car was on the right side for street sweeping. And took a while to actually get up.

Once I did I got washed and dressed. I really felt cute today. I wore some earrings I haven't worn in a while thG I really like. And I was tired but I was in an alright mood.

James made me an omelet but I only ate half of it. I was feeling weird. It it was fine. We would take a few minutes before we left but pretty quickly we were off to my appointment.

This appointment ended up being very stressful. I brought up that I need a yellow fever vaccine and it turns out that's a live vaccine and so I have to have a 4 week window of no immune suppression drugs. So it is going to be a really quick turn around for getting the vaccine and I will have to skip my medicine next month. Ugh. It's fine. It will be fine. But man. Stressful.

I had a really nice time talking to Sincere but for some reason whenever he does my injection I get crazy bruised or swollen. And this time I would get big lumps on my legs from the medicine sitting under my skin. Which was not and is not comfortable. Like it's been 12 hours and I still have lumps.

But it was fine. I chatted with the nice lady at the desk and she wished me luck on our travel and set me up for my appointment. The whole appointment took over an hour. But James was doing grocery shopping for some of it and calling the doctors to make sure we had the vaccine stuff set up. I still feel bad for making them wait but they say they dont mind. They got coffee and donuts. And I was in a much better head space.

We drove home and the plan was to install the ceiling fan Jess gave us. This did not go well. It did not have the correct bracket for our ceiling and it was heavy and we tried everything we knew what to do but it was just. Not happening. I would try helping but I'm to short and I can't hold my arms up that long. And James was really frustrated that it wasn't working out like they hoped. We tried for almost an hour before we just had to give up.

I went and laid in the other room because I felt dizzy. James pulled the duvet off the bed because it got dust from the ceiling on it.

James asked how we should attack the rest of the day. I requested we go to Mathews for a late lunch and then I would drop them off at the laundry mat and I could go to the thrift store. This was a really nice way to spend the day.

Lunch was fun. I like that the waitress, who I think is named Grace, knows our entire order and just double checks. Doesn't even give us menus anymore. And the food was good but I burnt my lip on very very hot sauce and was literally teary eyed about it! It's still bothering me! But it was still good.

I told James about what I was hoping to get at the thrift. Specifically mules and rain boots. And I would have good luck today.

After our meal we went to the laundry mat and we swapped seats so I was driving. And we said goodbye. And I was off.

I went to value village in Glen Burnie. I had to go through the tunnel to get there but that was fine. There would be traffic on the way back but it was whatever.

I was happy to be there on a weekday. For one it was basically empty. But also they were putting out new carts and there was some treasures to be found.

I was there for shoes mainly. And I found both things I was looking for! I got red ankle rain boots. I want to get insoles for them for they are great. And I found some leather mules that are like Birkenstock but no bucket and a lower profile. And they fit great. I was very excited.

I would also find two more Dear American books. A black cropped T-shirt. Some wall sconces that look like boat helms. And a dress that I think will be a great option for Africa. I also found a pillow that is made of alpaca and looks like a panda and I absolutely did not need it but I thought it was so cool. Maybe Sweetp can use it as a bed.

I was looking at the shirts when James let me know they would be done in approximately 15 minutes. So I went and paid. The woman that directed me to self checkout was super nice and kept calling me honey. Sweetheart.

I had kind of a rough drive to go get James. But it was fine. I just kept ending up in turn lanes that I couldn't get out of and then my phone kept disconnecting and I was overstimulated and wanted to go home. But I got James only a few minutes later then I hoped. And I was happy to see them.

We struggled to get back to the house though. Traffic and many roads having no turn lefts during the times we were on the road. So it took twice the time it should have but we got home and it was fine.

We would bring everything inside. James went to put away laundry and I put away my haul. And eventually we would head to the backyard to finish the catio.

This was mostly a James task with me helping. Attaching the screen was tough and it was very windy. But it's so much closer to being completed. I am going to look into getting an actual screen door for the end and we have to get masonry bits to anchor it to the house. But for now I used bungee cords and it's pretty stable. And I'm really excited that we got it basically completed in two days.

I was tired though. I was bringing in the scraps and things as well finished each panel. Once we were totally done I would make one last piece of wood to close the gap next to the one window. And James would bring in the rest of the wood. We were s good team.

James made us dinner. I had vegan fish fillets and a salad. James had pasta. And once we were done dinner I requested we watch the documentary that just came out about Nickelodeon and we just finished the second episode and it was. Dark. Really upsetting. We are going to save the next two episodes for tomorrow. It was not like shocking that there was abuses on these sets but man the gravity of it all was heavy.

We are all on the couch now. Sweetp is very cuddly. And my allergies are bothering me because of that. So I am going to go take a shower and get ready for bed. And hopefully tomorrow work is great and the dred I am feeling is nothing. I love you all. Goodnight!

[gurrenwrites]

Jada's Smile- A Short Story

Synopsis: When climate change and civil war ravage the United States, who gets blamed?

Day 12

"You seen Parasite?"

"No, why?"

"That movie haunts me to this day."

"Damn, it's really that scary?"

"In a way, yes, but not in the way you'd expect."

"We'll have to watch it once this is all said and done."

"Yeah, for sure."

The waves pounded against the edge of the creaky, wooden dock. The ocean was getting increasingly relentless as the sun etched its way lower and lower into the sky. The waning of the sun almost made it feel heavier in my pocket, its weight fluctuating and pulsating with each stride.

With each passing minute of agonizing, conversational lull, its mass grew and grew. Suddenly I found myself limping, struggling to carry its weight with just my right leg alone. Biting my lip, I maintained my stride to the best of my ability, careful not to hint at my struggle.

But Jada knew; she always knew. She looked at me with that stinging concern.

"You ok, Jack?"

"Yeah, of course."

"You don't seem ok."

"Well I am, trust me."

Another surge of growth; another wince.

"Alright guys," she stopped, turning to face our two companions. "We really should find a place to rest for the night."

"And get some food, right? I'm fuckin starving!" Dad smiled with excitement, bringing his wheelchair to a halt.

"I just gave you a granola bar two hours ago!" Amber clocked dad on the back of his head.

"One for me, four for you, right?" Dad chuckled, poking at her admittedly large stomach.

"Bastard," she sighed, unable to hide her smirk.

I still didn't fully understand why Amber chose to travel with us in the first place. Sure, Dad really had no other choice but to come; after all, he couldn't survive without me as his caretaker. Amber, on the other hand, was a fully capable woman in her 40s, not a legless veteran. She still had a whole Walmart to run, even without me as her top employee. But whether it be out of loyalty to me, a lust for adventure, or simply being a good person, she insisted on joining us until Jada was safe for good.

"Look, I know a nice hotel about a mile up ahead. I used to go there with my parents as a kid. The price is a bit steep, but they do free food for guests. What do you say we see if we can get a room?" Jada asked.

"Sounds good to me, I ain't broke just yet!" Dad excitedly wheeled ahead of us.

In agreement, we continued our stroll.

I instinctively reached down for my left pocket, clawing for a cellphone that I knew was no longer there. It's so easy for our brains to form routine, to take the luxuries of modern life for granted. If it were just a few years earlier, I would have been able to call ahead and make sure the hotel had a room before we trekked all the way over there. But the war had a funny way of taking things we were used to and chucking them into a dumpster fire.

The sunset had blossomed into a magnificent orgy of orange and violet. The waves crashed with increasing ferocity below, water beginning to leak up onto the dock's surface.

"Hey Jada?" I winced over pain from my adjacent pocket.

"What's up?"

"We're gonna make sure you're safe, I promise."

A glistening, white smile slid across her ebony skin. That smile was my purpose. That smile made it all worth it.

Day 36

Jada and I sat among the sisters as the sunrise leaked in through the pristine, glass windows compiling the lounge's walls. With no watch or phone, I couldn't really tell what time it was. But given the sun's position on the ocean's horizon, it was early enough for Amber and Dad to still be fast asleep in our room. For me on the other hand, sleep was a luxury that my mind simply wouldn't allow. Jada was no stranger to this insomnia either. I think guilt kept her awake at night; I can always feel it flaring up in my pocket as the night etches deeper and deeper into inky darkness.

"So young man, what brings you to our monastery?" the oldest of the nuns asked, breaking my train of thought.

They kindly took us in so late at night, I almost forgot they hadn't questioned our purpose before sending us off to shower and sleep. I looked at Jada, who nodded in approval. This meant I could choose between one of three pre-rehearsed cover stories. I strategically selected the one that would get us the most value out of these nuns.

"Her," I gently patted Jada on the back.

"You see, she was separated from her parents when the war hit New York, and ended up displaced down here in the south. We're traveling north to find her parents, which is very difficult without phones or the internet."

"Ah my poor things! What a nasty thing that war; we tried to stay out of it to the best of our abilities," the sister assured. "After all, the church must remain neutral in all conflicts."

"Though we all really know who's to blame here," another sister chimed in.

She sat legs crossed with a smug smile, middle aged, blonde, with a reddened complexion.

"Those nasty witches! Without them, none of this nonsense would have ever begun in the first place," a third sister, with graying, raven-black hair confirmed.

Anger bubbled inside my chest.

"I really don't think that's true. Witches, if you insist on calling them that, are just misunderstood, that's all. You can't blame the object dependent for years of our irresponsibility when they didn't even exist yet."

"Are you seriously defending those vile monsters?" the black-haired nun sneered.

Jada gripped my hand. It began to flare in my pocket as her nervousness grew, sending spasms of pain shooting down my leg.

The blonde sister huffed and smacked the arm of her chair, "I swear to our heavenly father, if I see one of those godforsaken degenerates, I'll kill her myself!"

"Amen," all the sisters chimed in in unison.

"Wow, such a beautiful morning!" Amber suddenly strolled in, wheeling a yawning Dad before her. "We should spend some time relaxing on the beach before the water gets too rowdy."

"We were actually just about to get going, weren't we Jack?" Jada shot up from her chair, yanking me up with her.

"But why wouldn't we stay just a few more hours? We have all day to walk," Amber said.

"You really gonna argue with her, Jack? She always gets what she wants," Dad chuckled, taking a sip of coffee from an ancient-looking mug.

"We have to get going Amber, we're on a schedule," I gritted my teeth.

Still, she failed to pick up on my que, gazing at Jada and I with complete cluelessness. She would get it soon enough. My leg was on fire; I couldn't keep my pain hidden any longer. A golden glow burst from my pocket, illuminating the room with a yellow tinge.

The oldest sister sprang up from her armchair with startling ferocity for a woman of her age.

"A familiar!," she pointed with a shriek.

Jada broke free from my hand, and turned to me.

"Run!"

Day 1,012

The smog was unbearably thick this morning, if it was still morning that is. It was hard to tell this close to a facility. Amber, Jada, and I trudged through the jungle of mutated dunegrass, barely able to see just a few feet ahead of us. We would not have been able to make it any further if we still had to push dad around.

I found myself stopping. My pocket wasn't any heavier than the usual, constant heft, but the weight in my chest was paralyzing.

As if reading my mind, Jada placed her arm around my shoulder.

"We have to keep moving; this is dangerous territory."

"I know, I know."

"I can hold it if you want me to. It's easier for me to carry; you know that."

"We can't; it's too risky to keep you together. You know that as well as I do."

"Give it to me then; stop being so stubborn," Amber reached out with the annoyed compassion that used to bug the hell out of me during our Walmart days. But those days were long gone; Amber wasn't my supervisor anymore.

"NO," I barked, immediately regretting my tone.

This took both of them aback; they gently stepped away.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just... it's just..."

Before I could finish, I felt the warmth of Jada's arms surround me, immediately followed by Amber's from the other side.

"Think about how far we've come," Jada said. "We can't stop now, we have to keep moving forward."

"It's what your dad would have wanted," Amber added.

I stood up, breaking off from my companions.

"You're right; we have to keep going!" I turned to Jada, "we'll find you somewhere safe in no time, I promise."

The rustling pierced my ears before I could continue on.

Instinctually, I leapt on top of Jada, knocking her to the ground, covering her entire body with mine. Before she even had time to ask what was going on, a small group of soldiers crashed through the brush toting massive, monstrous guns, pointing their long barrels directly at us.

"You three! Who are you? What are you doing on facility grounds?"

Amber confidently slid in front of us; her cover story ready to go.

"We're so sorry sir. You see, I'm trying to get my niece and nephew to New York City, they got separated from their family during the war and..."

"Very funny. You know as well as I do that Manhattan is underwater."

My heart sunk. It wasn't our true destination, but it was our cover for so long that it almost felt true, like an artificial goal. Now even the waves had taken that from us.

"We... we didn't know that actually. We don't really get much news when traveling like this."

"Can I see your identification?" another soldier stepped forward.

Suddenly my pocket spasmed, sending me shooting off of Jada. She was clearly in a panic.

"Well, well, well. Look who we have here," the first soldier chuckled. "If it isn't the infamous Wicked Witch of the East herself. You really think you could hide from us with that hair, that scar? You're wanted everywhere; nowhere's safe for you."

My pocket strained, beginning to tear; it was the heaviest I ever felt it since I met her.

"You're coming with us," the second pointed his gun in our faces.

Grabbing Jada's hand, I attempted to burst into a sprint. It was fruitless; she was ripped apart from me near-instantly.

"Jack, Amber, run! Run as far away as you can! I'll be fine! I promise! GO!" she struggled in the arms of her captors.

My pocket burst open, sending it smashing onto the ground below.

The relief on my leg was unexplainable, but the weight on my chest was ever present. I was paralyzed with fear.

"GET THAT GUY AND GET THAT THING, NOW!" the soldier holding Jada screamed.

"I'll be fine, I promise," Jada smiled.

The smile shattered my heart and reformed it over and over again in an agonizing loop. My only goal was to keep her safe, keep that smile safe, and I failed.

"You haven't failed yet."

Suddenly my adrenaline came back in full force. I hoisted it from the ground, turned to Amber, and we ran.

"I swear I'll stay nearby; I'll keep it close until we find a way to get you out of there! I won't let you die! I'll keep you safe; I promise!" I screamed as we sped past the soldiers and deeper into the grass.

It withered down to its normal size as my shouts echoed back to Jada.

Day 3,650

The heat beat down upon me with sizzling ferocity. Wiping the globs of sweat from my unruly, greying beard, I continued to push the wheelchair across the abandoned road. Soon the heat would be too high, and the water too scarce to push on, but we'd worry about that when it comes. That's how we made it this long after all.

Chunks of the shattered boardwalk sat submerged in blue, relentlessly bobbing in the roaring waves. The blue monsters etched closer and closer, gnawing away at the edge of the street. But the road was only so thin, and traversing the ruins of the hotel strip to our right wouldn't be possible with Jada's condition.

She sat contently, happily humming along with a tune only she could hear. I needed to get her water fast. But the waves were too close; I couldn't leave her here while I explored the ruins for the narrow chance that some half-drunk bottles lay in the rubble.

It sat nearly weightless in my pocket, the smallest it had ever been. Just one wrong move and it would shatter into a million pieces. I couldn't take any more risks if I wanted to keep her safe, if I wanted to see that smile again.

"Hey Jada?"

"Yeah?" she turned up

"You seen Parasite?"

"No, why?"

"That movie haunts me to this day."