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randomgooberness · 1 year

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@temothylol you have just plucked the WRONG jenga stick, my friend.

OKAY SO. the TLDR of this is: Mind(from Freeman’s Mind) puts the sample in the rotator like usual in his canon, but it gets all weird and snaps him into another timeline/universe: HLVRAI, and he’s forced to “go under cover” because the guy who they’re calling Gordon Freeman IS NOT HIM and is likely a government coverup here to replace him- so he has to play it cool as he tries to escape with them. Through this journey he learns the power of friendship and how to not be as much of a fucking asshole.

This AU is being rped by me and my friend @shineyfish !

The SUPER SHORT TLDR is: mind makes friends and shit sucks so much but its otay the power of friendship :)

THE LONG VERSION IS:

(warning for blood, gore, and talk about suicide at the end)

Like I said, he’s transferred via Resonance Cascade, and thrown into the HLVRAI universe. When people address Gordon by his name, he goes. Oh shit this guy is here to replace me. What the FUCK. And of course when Gordon asks for his name he panics and goes “MIND. MIND YOUR BUISNESS” and it sticks. sorry dude you’re Mr. Mind now.

Unlike how Freeman’s Mind takes place over the span of a day or so, this follows more HLVRAI’s timeframe. Which should be more like 4 or 5 days but I always write it as like. a Month because it makes it feel more like a journey and I like it.

Just like in normal HLVRAI, shit is Looney Tunes and BONKERS, though, like Gordon does, he adjusts to it with varying levels of stress- kinda going into denial as well- though he realizes Gordon is kinda the “leader” as well as is the MOST NORMAL, so he’s the one he talks to the most- and Gordon himself see’s him as More Normal Than The Rest.

He is, however, more suspicious of Gordon because, unlike everyone else, he doesn’t seem like much of a person outside of Black Mesa! Like, sure, he has a Son, but... that’s kinda it? He likes video games? This guy is suspicious as HELL.

(Meanwhile, the ACTUAL reason as to why Gordon is Like That is because he’s the player characters model. His backstory gets made up on the fly and he’s not given as much stuff as everyone else- not to mention, even outside of being a vessel for someone to play a game, he’s...depressed. And lonely. He has identity issues and doesn’t fucking know what he’s doing with his life except for taking care of Josh every third week and then playing video games when he’s not doing that.)

A Running Theme here is: while it sorta takes a bit, they DO become friends! The cost of this is: Mind is NOT USED TO HAVING FRIENDS. Gordon isn’t either but Mind especially didn’t Plan to make friends nor did he Want to, and now that he’s attached to people, he freaks out more over the shit happening around him. Because he has people to WORRY ABOUT. Meanwhile, in Gordons case, he has someone who is “relatively normal” or another “straight” man in this situation, which means that he gets grounded more often and isn’t as mean- but this comes at the cost of, well, dissociation makes it easy to forget what's happening around you and the weight of it. If you get grounded during a traumatic event you Get More Traumatized. So both of them are more traumatized than their source versions LMAO.

As of writing this, we’re almost half way through RPing act 2, and Mind has only JUST realized he can trust Gordon(which I want to draw the scene where he realizes this SO BAAAD ace did a FANTASTIC job writing Mind starting to break the boundaries between what hes saying Out Loud and what he’s saying in his head), and they’re...getting along. It’s really sweet I like them :)

Another fun thing that they haven’t figured out in RP yet(mostly because they haven’t even realized they’re from separate universes yet), is that Mind is from 2007. HLVRAI is in 2020. I’m not sure how they’re gonna figure that out before they escape but it’ll be really funny. Here’s a post-plot doodle

OH AND DONT WORRY IT’S NOT ALL JUST MIND AND GORDON. Those two get along the best bc Mind has very little tolerance for bullshit but he gets along with Bubby okay at first(after he betrays Gordon, he fucking HATES him and it’s hard to repair that). He is Scared of Dr. Coomer and sorta hates him, and he is also scared of Tommy but tolerates him the most out of all of the Science Team post-plot. As of right now in the rp, Mind has attacked Benrey NUMEROUS TIMES. Here’s my two favorites

(dr coomer was played here by my friend Newt, though I play him most the time. I just gave them permission to interrupt as him at any moment because its funny as hell)

I also, just real quick, want to mention post-plot is p similar to my fic Headfirst for Halos, except Mind is also there as a wacky roommate. When Benrey moves in shit is the worst ever and its so funny.

Something I physically cannot refrain from spoiling is the Betrayal Scene. We have no Rped it yet, but we have planned it and the aftermath in-depth and it makes me FUCKING INSANE.

Basically, like I said, Mind doesn’t trust anything for the first few days- ESPECIALLY Gordon. Also, Mind was going through Withdrawals the first few days(which were only relieved because he eventually told Gordon who started trying to hack his suit to give him some morphine routinely- not too much, just enough to ease his suffering until they got out).

This meant that Mind was very, very prone to shit-talking Gordon behind his back, especially to Bubby. This ends up morphing into a bit of a situation in Act 3. Mind trusts Gordon by then, but still makes a few jokes with Bubby and Benrey from time to time- though he backs out once it starts getting too mean(which is funny as hell because mind is the meanest guy there). Because he backs out, Bubby and Benrey don't trust him to let him in on their plan to betray Gordon, but they don’t throw him into it, either, thinking he’ll be willing to walk away and turn a “blind eye” when it happens.

...He doesn’t, but he DOES earn a Blind Eye.

Mind dives in to help Gordon, and is IMMEDIATELY overwhelmed by the marines, and suddenly, he’s laying on the floor fighting for his consciousness while he listens to Gordon scream for help.

When he wakes up, he realizes a few things.

1. He only has half his field of vision. 2. The walls are starting to close in. 3. His first and now Only friend is borderline-dead next to him and missing an arm. 4. The walls are starting to close in. 5. He has to get him, and a guy bigger than him, OUT of here. 6. THE WALLS ARE STARTING TO CLOSE IN.

So, with that, he has to, in a spur of adrenaline, drag Gordon and himself out of a trash compactor while dealing with a new disability for the first time. Once they’re Out, he has to sit there, watching Gordon’s suit try to cauterize his wound and wonder if he’s going to lose the first person he’s ever Actually Fucking Cared About. He sits there for a few hours, and when Gordon finally wakes up, he is thrust into the position of comforting someone at their lowest point- something he doesn’t know how to fucking do.

When he sacrifices his bandana to wrap up Gordons arm and try to prevent further blood loss that the cauterization didn’t seal, Gordon says something that, one, no one has ever said to him, and two, sounds a lot like last words.

Gordon has no problem telling his friends he loves them. He said he loved Dr. Coomer within the first hours of the Resonance Cascade.

Mind, meanwhile, is only just now realizing he has a friend in the first place, and that friend is dangerously close to dying.

Anyways. Mind does NOT trust Tommy when they meet up with him again, but only stops threatening to kill him when he realizes he’s making Gordon freak the fuck out.

The Dr. Coomer fight. It goes um. :)

And when they meet up with Bubby, the guy throws Mind under the bus and tells him, right in front of Gordon, that he figured he’d be fine with the betrayal because he was Also shittalking Gordon. Up until that point, Gordon was only really trusting Mind(and sorta Tommy), so it’s a HUGE blow that he starts spiraling from, and Mind is forced to show character development by apologizing genuinely as he can to him and telling him that he trusts Gordon with his Fucking Life. Mind ALSO has to go through the extremely unsettling realization that him and Bubby are in more similar boats than he thought, messing with his black and white thinking patterns.

Mind struggles with the concept that he might’ve just ruined his friendship with Gordon until the guy suddenly announces that, because he’s so bloodloss right now, he cannot lead, and appoints Mind as leader instead. Mind goes through the thought process of “OH YAY GORDON LIKES AND TRUST ME AGAIN!” to “YES. POWER FOR ME. I DESERVE TO LEAD” and then “OH MY FUCKING GOD THIS IS THE MOST STRESSFUL THING IN THE WORLD”.

another theme, and probably my FAVORITE, is their different stances on life. I’m putting this at the end because it has a Huge suicide warning.

Mind wants to live. He wants to get out of here, and live his life. He has Plans, he is always coming up with More Plans.

Gordon...doesn’t plan. He doesn’t consider what he’s doing when he gets out- he asks everyone else, and then freezes up when he’s asked in turn. And, in the worst moments, he impulsively tries to die. In HLVRAI, this man has had at least 4 suicide attempts. He only spirals like that when his stress spikes, but it’s still not a good thing at ALL, and a sign that there is something deeper here.

So, when Mind witnesses all this with Gordon, he’s...horrified. The first time Gordon threatens to kill himself, he thinks he’s joking- because like, it was funny. Making a joke about shooting your brains out if you have to swim again is funny. But then when the guy tries to Swim Into A Blade, he realizes he isn’t joking. And he has no idea what to do, because his first ever friend wants to die and he’s already stressed at the idea of losing him from Outside sources.

It’s a contrast that is FASCINATING to work with and we’re having fun toying with it.

anyways thanks for opening pandoras box. I’m sure i have more to say but it’s all stuff ill eventually talk about or im forgetting and will discuss later. feel free to ask questions if youd like i feel insane over this naruto and among us crossover au

#hlvrai #freeman's mind #gordon freemind #gordon feetman #cw: suicide #cw: gore #hlvraifm

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felassan · 7 months

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A conversation/interview video with Casey Hudson called "Casey Hudson Interview: Mass Effect Director on New Studio Humanoid Origin and His Next Game": [source and watch link] In the video they discuss topics like previous BioWare games and the early days at BioWare.

Part of video description:

"In this career-spanning interview, I talk to Mass Effect creator Casey Hudson about his philosophy on game development, projects like Star Wars: KotOR, and his new remote-friendly studio, Humanoid Origin, which is hard at work on an all-new sci-fi game IP."

Some quotes/notes under the cut:

Covid was a strange time for everyone. Casey was a studio head at BioWare when the pandemic and lockdown hit; everyone went home. this was very surreal, but he "was sitting in [his] home office as the General Manager for a studio of several hundred people", and "it kind of worked pretty well, and then it just makes you realize that if that's possible, then maybe you don't need the big infrastructure, huge studio locations, maybe there's a different way to do it."

Casey is also a concept artist. when they were starting creating Mass Effect, he was really concerned with the Citadel and what the shape of it was going to be, so he did tons of drawings trying to figure out what it would look like.

In the early days of BioWare, the old BioWare culture had devs often out dancing on Whyte Avenue. many of the devs in the early days at BW worked on Whyte Avenue. just downstairs from them is where all the bars and restaurants were, and many of the devs lived within walking distance. at that time work was most of their lives. if they wanted to meet their friends at the bar, they were just downstairs or across the street. "This is not a lifestyle that you wanna maintain into your 30s and 40s, but that's kind've what it was like at that time. But because it was so, I think it was a really narrow existence in a lot of ways and half of it is in the winter, bitterly cold outside, that we then first of all have a lot of time to focus and imagine something but also you then really start thinking of like, what does the escape look like? Where do you want to be right now? Instead of in the middle of the winter in Edmonton working 12 hours a day. Where would you, what do you fantasize about? That I think is kinda what propelled a lot of the vision for these really epic places and a sense of escapism." - Interestingly KOTOR and ME1 both have levels/scenes near the end with beaches.

It took people 15 years to notice that the sentence in the opening segment of ME1 "and the civilizations of the galaxy called it.. mass effect" was an homage to Top Gun ("the pilots call it Top Gun"). this was put in there because Casey used to want to be a fighter pilot when he was younger.

Why did they have the Reapers in ME, these lovecraftian terrifying horror things? They originate from 2 things. BW really envisioned ME as "imagine that there was a movie that came out in the late 70s or early 80s". it was to be kind of in the vein of Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan, or Alien, and like it was like a major sci-fi hit that just didn't get released, only now you get to play it and be in that experience. "So that's kind of where we went with, not necessarily horror, but that sort of sci-fi suspense feeling. And then I think the other piece was, we were just really swinging for the fences. like, if there's a threat, what is the biggest threat? And if you're gonna make a decision in this game, let's make them agonizing decisions of the highest stakes, and so ME kind've has this feeling like, of everything being big and important and difficult choices and huge scale. And I think that's where it came from."

99% of the creature models for Neverwinter Nights were thrown in the trash. Casey made a bunch of models over the course of a year, as a major part of his role that year. Then the D&D 3rd Edition rules came out with concepts in them for how things were supposed to look. "I believe what happened was we were asked to just snap to those concepts, so all of these character models that I had made were just never going to get used. the irony of it is the one thing that did end up getting used was the giant spider model I did in my first day or two."

(on his first day at BioWare they gave him a concept for a giant spider, and in his first week he made this spider monster model.)

early screenshots of NWN were from a prototype as opposed to the proper game engine.

the interviewer mentioned that the NWN era was a stressful time, a dark time at BioWare. the publisher was going bankrupt.

the co-founder doctors Ray and Greg were very good at providing an environment that felt stable because they were shielding the devs from a lot of the existential crisis the business was in, so it felt stable, but they also provided real stability. "The games that we worked on, for many years, everything we worked on shipped and became a good game that brought revenue into the studio and elevated our status as a developer. But I know that it was a lot rougher waters than what we experienced. I'm always curious to follow up with Rey and Greg and find out what that would have been like for them."

The interviewer then mentions that things then got a little more exploratory at the studio at that time, and the fact that there were some cancelled projects. Casey: "At that point, we were becoming larger as a studio and growing the number of projects we had at a given time. I think at one point there was just more projects than we could sustain in terms of focus and just the logistics of getting that many things out. Prior to that though we had an amazing run, it was very rare to be able to ship everything that you work on, and I think we had that for quite a while."

At that time in games development, devs just worked on the game they were working on all day. Nowadays in game development there's lots of other things they often have to do during their day at work (like instead of and in addition to). in his new studio, Casey said he wants to try and work smarter or faster, and without ending up doing crunch time, and without working on things that end up needing to be downscoped.

He also discussed the development of KOTOR at various points in the video and relayed some anecdotes about KOTOR. for example, Jolee Bindo is named after his imaginary friend from childhood that he had.

On the naming of Anthem: "So that one, I've only heard the story secondhand because I came into Anthem at the very end. I was on that project at the very, that was going to be the next full game that I was gonna work on right after ME3. We moved onto what was going to be our new IP and it was called Project Dylan at the time. I worked on Dylan for about a year before I left EA. I was at Microsoft for a while. then after a few years, that project was still going and then had actually been announced as Anthem and had its E3 debut. So they already had their name, as of that point. As I understand, that was another one where it's just, you try a number of different names, and at this point, there are just so many things being copy-written that it's really hard to find a name that isn't blocked by an existing product. But I thought that was a great name."

In the early days of BW they generally didn't have much interaction with the publisher. "It just really felt like we could just go off and design something that was true to itself and was amazing for what we were making". it's harder and harder to do this nowadays as publishers and studios get bigger and bigger.

[source]

#bioware #mass effect #video games #covid mention #long post #longpost #alcohol cw #anthem

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single-malt-scotch · 9 months

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i have watched bdubs and scar and so im gonna talk abt SL again like i did before. obvs spoilers!

i keep my posts pretty meta/only about the game, its mechanics, balance etc so i have no bias on players own actions. but i do want to talk about players and the final moments for a minute here!

obvs i like bdubs a lot and hes been very good at getting to almost the finals in all the series. hope ppl realize that more. if he had more hearts like scar did im sure he could of have gotten further too. etho's ep isnt out but i saw him die in scar's and scar's ep was wild for sure. i mean damn, there was hardly a way etho could have escaped scar when he landed right on top of him, insane. obvs i dont have a view on the others i havent watched but it was interesting to see how they ganged up in this series for the end. scar winning made me happy too, hes a really good player!!

bbut onto the gameplay. i dont wanna repeat myself so im kinda using this as an overall conclusion + specific thoughts about the finale.

its been established clearly that mods assign specific tasks to people at times. and the warden/wither + bogey were not something i enjoyed. this season felt way too "directed" as it went on... and i also think the tasks ability to grant you so much good stuff (a LOT of hearts) is what kept everyone out of being red so easily! which is probably why they did the bogey zombies. which is really just poor balance that no one clearly tested (i recall grian implying before that they dont really test anything but dont quote me on that). maybe a way to have improved that would have been reds were the only ones to gain hearts, and yellow/greens could not. i knew from the start that the heart giving mechanics this season were kind of pointless or overpowered. gifting one heart? really...? that doesnt add up to much of anything in the long run imo unless you manage to get hearts from multiple people. and then on top of that you get hearts back from the secret keeper too. i would have loved if this season was simply "no regen and thats it!" like a sorta UHC deal where you only can heal with specific items (and not 30 hearts prob? bc i understand the tasks were kind of a way to possibly make them die).

on big forced tasks it only made sense with this episode, since everyone is red, so i dont mind that. but again.... they had to force this to happen which is annoying to me. also in terms of balance i really wished they bring back strict rules on enchantments because that also gets frustrating to watch. but perhaps i just like fairness in combat due to watching so much UHC, which also is a death game.

the other issues i had were with reds and red tasks. as pointed out they forced reds in the previous sessions but no one had any time to do red tasks?? and admittedly it was kind of boring bc people couldnt interact about it without failing. but they could not team up properly and i think that is what red life is all about. all the reds coming together because they *need* to face yellows and greens, and hunt people down. but instead the few reds there had to be alone to do their traps, another social issue with this series where tasks often pulled people away from others and left them with videos where they were very alone. there being no space for greens and yellows to exist and get hunted is something i think is great in previous seasons too and it just didnt happen. all that getting forced in that one session just didnt flow well to me.

really even trying to look back at episodes, i cant recall any notable interactions between people i enjoyed minus some brief pauses when they were traveling to do their tasks. there just wasnt a lot of typical socializing! and thats what i didnt like with this series. this plus the balance issues of lives just made this series feel messy, and the length of the episodes due to tasks could be kind of boring if the task was boring or even felt too stressful to force them into places where they could just die (these kinds of dangerous tasks given to greens or yellows felt unfair, as if it was trying to force them to die, and as a viewer i wouldnt want the game make my fave die!).

and as i mentioned in a different post, the lack of fixing some issues in multiple seasons is wild to me. this season faced the same issue as limlife where deaths were not in chat. the episode after, they fixed it (still with some bugs). and then it happened again last session.... and they didnt fix it! this is also annoying bc people dont react to the deaths at all which you kind of wanna see you know? actually im not even sure why they still did it this way. i imagined the clock running out made it more complicated for the system of fying to work. but why this season....? seemed like pretty forward deaths. idk the tech side, but they had 3 solid lives like all the other season, and there were never issues with the death messages happening at all.

but anyways. theres multiple parts of this i mentioned above that just made this gimmick feel so messy and unbalanced, and sometimes not super interesting to watch. it was way too complicated some times. i know theyll likely never do a repeat of the old versions but man idk if i cant find myself liking future seasons if they start stacking so much on top of what is a simple concept. it has started to feel like the three lives havent mattered at all/arent really the focus-- the anxiety of having three times. and the stakes become less and less due to some of these new gimmicks (the ability to gain lives in so many easy ways- limlife and secret life- is why imo) makes death feel less of a problem especially when we know how buddy buddy everyone is now. people need to be limited like before, and be more anxious. 3L, LL, and DL had people quickly establishing their friends bc they knew right from the get go that the series really depended on them being alive and nothing else. the only focus was to stay alive and not die. DL was where ppl kinda chilled a bit on alliances bc they knew each other more but, death was still right around the door with health being tied, it still brought a similar kind of anxiety for players.

i do hope people like grian can recognize these issues behind the scenes bc genuine critique for this series/season is important. like i hope they dont brush off the fact "hall monitors" were an issue-- they can ignore them openly in their videos.... but there is a reason why its a problem that started at all. the concept was way too subjective and hard to judge! so id hate for them to decide "eh, lets not listen to them, im gonna keep doing this and not consider the issue for a new season" right? and hour long episodes? thats crazy, and i dont think it was good for a lot of cc imo, because it made me way less likely to watch or even finish others' episodes. i hope that makes sense... stakes need to be raised, and i think limlife still achieved that to some degree because time was still very sensitive and risky to take. but then SL comes in bringing way too many things that keep them alive far too easily, leaving very little concern as long as they got their task in.

and last thing is from the outside pov i get concerned about this season happening only 6 months after the last one. because that would very very easily cause a burn out/inability to make more gimmicks real quick. i find this particularly odd bc this season too place through multiple holidays...! not sure if they thought this one through very well. considering how much limlife changed things in a way that was a bit more complicated, and then have SL with even more going on.... id just be worried about how much new stuff would even be made after this.

before this season started i was thinking to myself that i would be fine if this was the last one (it was speculation off some posting 3L compilations that was being me think itd be 'over' bc that was the first season). and truly i would be fine if they stopped forever for for a long time. i dont want to start disliking this series if they keep going in this direction... i will ALWAYS enjoy seeing these people play together and it will no doubt keep me watching but, i would hope that i will enjoy what they do for the next seasons and not fall down this path of convoluted, unbalanced and complicated concepts.

#secret life spoilers

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valcksys · 1 year

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source separation

(And my journey with it, all under the cut!)

I thought I’d write a long ranty post about source separation, since I’m an alter who’s gone through it (mostly). I just want to get my experiences out there and possibly help some other alters who might be struggling with this topic understand it more or, whatever.

So let’s start with Introductions! I’m Samantha, but I usually go with just Sam. I’m a factional introject of an ow esports player named S9mm. I use she/her pronouns and identify as a trans woman. (This will be important later.)

I first formed around June last year, so I’ve been around for a bit. When I first started getting my bearings, I was terrified! I mean, I’d been ripped away from my life (which was quite good most of the time!) and now I was stuck here, in a new body, alone. In a pretty abusive environment. Not fun at all!

My first reaction to all of this was escape. Which is to say I was so deep in wanting to be back in my source, and wanting to have my body and face and life back that I couldn’t focus on living the one I’m in right now. Whenever I fronted I was fucking miserable. All I could think about was my “past”. To me, this is an example of being unhealthily attached to your source. If it’s getting in the way of enjoying your current life or focusing on it then that’s not good!

I had a long chat with another alter, who’d been in the system for a while and went through that same deal. And the first thing they told me was to stop interacting with anything related to my source. Just find out who you are. Minus the source. Minus the premade personality and form you came with. Once you’ve found it, you can start to merge the two together. Finding you while still identifying with your source is possible. There’s just a delicate balance that I was definitely not balancing well.

And this is what I did for a while, I stopped watching OWL games, I stopped playing Overwatch, and I focused more on the things going on around me. I started trying new things. I learned stuff about myself! And it was nice. I’ve picked up art as a hobby, I love drawing. I also enjoy other video games, particularly roguelikes and rpgs which I never thought I would’ve liked. If I hadn’t ever let go partly of my source and who I’m “supposed” to be, I wouldn’t’ve ever discovered those things. During this period I also began realizing I might be a trans woman. (Source is a Cis male.) For a while I rejected it, still having that feeling in the back of my mind that it’s wrong because my source is a cis man. As well as all of the more typical woes that come with transness. (Which I’m going to assume nearly everyone reading this understands.)

Once I took that break, and found myself, I realized that life didn’t feel as. Well frankly, ASS, anymore. I wasn’t constantly dissociating, wishing I was “home” or the like. Home was here now, and I began to accept it. I participated more in our daily life.

After I did accept that I’m a trans woman, and that I’m Samantha, not S9mm, I was able to then reconnect with my source in a healthy way. I could watch content from my source and enjoy it without feeling like shit, I could play Overwatch and enjoy that without feeling like shit.

The point of me typing all this out really, is that there’s always a DEGREE of source separation that is healthy, and should be encouraged. But you don’t have to completely detach from your source.

I mean, my name is still Sam. I still look like my source in the headspace. (Kinda, I’m just more girly now lol.) I still refer to my pseudomemories and make jokes about my source and enjoy my source.

You can definitely have both!

Anyway rant’s over I hope this helps someone or something idk.

#made by sam #sorry for so many tags #I just want this to reach people #did system #traumagenic system #osddid #actually did #traumagenic #polyfrag system #introject #factive #fictive #factroject #fictroject #system #actually dissociative

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lepidopteragirl · 2 years

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So fucked up soap elaborate on the time traveling to not kill quackity part as an apology.

-j

cat jumping up and down gif jjj!! my best friend @anonymous-jey (<- tagging so u can see bc i took a while to answer ths one and then answered it at 3 am dorry about that) HI J!!!!!!!!! HEHE OKAY so i have two options here that i am turning around in my brain

referencing this post :)

first one is timeloop!! of the same day, he gets somehow manages to get just enough control of his time travel to trap himself in a timeloop of the same day, memories not jumbled as they were before, but skip-y, like he has both versions, the real version, and XD's version, but as the same day goes by again and again more and more come back. no matter how hard he tries though, the day seems to end the same way, him shoving quackity off a cliff, accidentally hitting him instead of a zombie. they r cursed. etc. and at the end of everyday karl gets a choice to go back, like in a video game or smth etc. (normally he resets just as sapnap runs in the door, communicator in his hand to find karl covered in blood standing over quackity's body.)

karl slowly starts to realize that hes never going to be able to get out of this cycle, never get to escape without killing quackity. that the only way hes going to be able to get out of it until he accepts it, confronts what he did when sapnap gets there. so the tries that, he talks to sapnap and they try to accept it and sapnap is very angry but they somehow manage to make up and try to. do smth. move on figure smth out. they go to sleep. and guess what day karl wakes up on.

at this point hes getting really hopeless, miserable, sad, etc, and decides if this is his last chance, if this is all he has left before quackity dies, he wants to make up, wants to apologize for everything he said in the past that quackity remembers, and even what he doesnt. this goes poorly as quackity (not remembering the number of times karl has killed him before) assumes karl is making fun of him. and. well they fight again and that goes bottoms up and karl has seen this film before etc, but somehow, this time is different, and they manage to make up THEN END LOVE WINS!!!!!! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

okay and option two is a little less sad and melodramatic etc and a little more back to the future but make it. uh. ????

anyway very similar start except from instead of karl accidentally sending himself into a timeloop, he accidentally (on purpose?) sends himself back to the day of the dethronement conflict. more specifically, just outside of some fight happening outside of the prime path. he barely recognizes himself at first. he recognizes quackity first though, almost as soon as he hears his voice. hes so much younger, so much more naive, but karl knows its him. just a second later, he recognizes sapnap, george, dream, and as the time travel nausea starts to fade, he starts to recognize himself too. they barely look like the same person anymore, he realizes slowly, sliding down behind a tree to steady himself while the fighting continues just a bit away.

hes not exactly sure why he's here, or even how he got all the way back here, but hes decided hes going to do everything he can to mkae the most of it, do a little back to the future and keep himself from forgetting, but more importantly keep q from dying. how is he going to figure this out you ask? well im not quite sure but i think maybe his communicator still kinda works so he can use that like that one phto from back to the future. his plan? he has to keep past!q from dying at technos execution. he tries but unfortunately he is a fool and a sad little noodle and he fucks it up and convinces q to convince tubbo to move up the schedule on the butcher army, and yeah, then quackity dies. fuck. this is tragic for karl, as he has just watched quackity die to his own hand and guess who he blames for thistoo!

lcukily for him, hes very used to watching people die in front of him. around this time, past!karl is taken for his very first tale! awh :)! cute!!! now!karl immediately remembers /that/, mourns his past self etc, but makes the most of it by doing his best to disguise himself as past!karl as quackity recovers, and they start to jump right back into work for el rapids, not yet christened yet. present!karl does his best to take care of quackity as he recovers, and does his best to tell him things that will keep him from getting hurt in the future. but he gets sad and ends up just awkwardly trying to make sure quackity knows karl loves him, that smth's wrong that he never would forget him etc. together they work on el rapids and whatnot, and then, the time when we get to the day where its pretty clear the same plot regarding framing eret.

guess who gets back its past!karl. present!karl finds him in the woods, sort of confused and small and just back from Time etc. but he has to let past!karl go, cant stop the el rapids plot. ofc he cant talk to his past self, but he figures as a last ditch effort, he can try to leave a message, one last message to his past self, one last chance to fix things. he tears out a photo from a locket or smth and writes a message on the back, smth to fix smth one last chance, and drops the locket into the leaves and waits. past karl picks it up, and present karl holds his breath and. past karl drops it and runs back out to their house as sapnap starts yelling looking for him.

and then karl has to accept that he failed. he cries its sad etc just then, to make matters worse, he starts getting sucked back to the present. he cant fight it he goes back etc. but to his surprise, he wakes up on the couch, in some, just a little different version of kinoko, with sapnap and quackity bent over him, looking worried. they look just a little different, that he remembers them, sapnaps got way more flashy gold jewelry and about seven earrings, the kind someone who often visits a casino might wear, and he looks less stressed, smile opener than karls seen it in a while; quackitys still in his suit, but he looks softer and less on edge, bandana and flowers in his hair, wings free and relaxed at his shoulders. but its them, and they look happy, they look so happy. its them :)

(at the end, after having a small discussion w his fiances and starts to realize what he managed to change, how they're all together and how nothings ever been wrong ever!! :D he finds a small silver locket in his hoodie pocket :))

#ty for the ask!!! <333 #im not super familiar with the timeline of el rapids im sorry if i messed part of this up #time travel fics r so fun i lveo them sm #this is so long im so sorry i just had to get my demons out im sorry

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zachsgamejournal · 1 year

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COMPLETED: Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee New 'n' Tasty

Within the past couple of years I played through the original again and absolutely loved it (to the best of of memory). While the vibe is great, and I'm pumped for more Oddworld, I was disappointed in what I hoped to be the definitive version of Abe's first adventure...

I was surprised that I chose to play this game. But having beaten Kena: Bridge of Spirits--I needed more beautiful adventures: NOW! I kinda new I was going to be playing Munch's Oddysee and Stranger's Wrath next--but those games are a bit graphically dated--and came out when we thought 3D graphics could deliver more than they actually could. So that desire to have pretty graphics, a great adventure, and delve into the realm of Oddworld brought me back to a game I wasn't sure I'd ever play: New 'n' Tasty.

Well...actually, I've played it before. I think it was on PS3. I was pretty pumped when it released because I LOVED the original. I was really excited to see the classic gameplay realized in a 3D environment. But I wasn't sure how they'd pull it off, because the puzzles and gameplay really is about these "screens". Probably more on that later.

What I remember from my first time replaying was that it was similiar but different. Because I hadn't played the original the world, I wasn't quite sure where they were deviating and where they stayed true. I only made it to Scabania before never playing it again (for some reason...probably kids). The game was cheap over xmas, and I bought it with almost every other Oddworld game, but I never really thought I'd play it. Yet, it called to me and I answered.

NOW, playing it again I have the benefit of having played the original fairly recently, and knowing that the original is a perfect work of art. So if I'm not feeling this version, it's because something didn't translate...and it turns out, things did not translate.

The first thing that got to me were the graphics. I was surprised to find them so bland. The whole time I was thinking, "Didn't they look better on PS3??" And my laptop is PS4 Pro equivalent. I think. I made it to the Scabanian temple before I found the graphics were set to medium. I pumped them up to full power and the game was much prettier. But I'm sad that I played the first half not seeing the game at its true glory.

This is important.

The art direction of the original is amazing. Quite often, the graphics were insanely realistic. As humorous and cartoony as it could be--some of the scenes are the most realistic and impressive I've seen in a video game. Unfortunately, there was a cost to moving to 3D on Xbox. The series couldn't rely on good art, it needed good technology. And while Xbox was the most power of its generation, 3D games still often had bland textures and block models. Some games, like Resident Evil Outbreak, were able to pull off amazing 3D graphics, but those were tight, small areas with restricted camera angles. The fully explorable world of Munch and Stranger had to sacrifice detail for freedom. Being released on PS3/PS4 (I don't know), allowed the team get more bang for the buck--but also using the side scrolling format allowed them to focus more attention to the immediate instead of sacrificing resources to render are larger world.

So yes, once I amped up the graphics I was more impressed. Even with low settings, they managed to transition many of the interesting, organic environments into cool 3D spaces. While the game clearly reuses resources, they're able to make each area feel pretty unique. This is mostly noticeable when escaping the factor at night and in Scabania.

Moving on from the presentation, I start to get disappointed...

The main problem with the game is precision. In the original, there's a station screen. Enemies within that screen can help you and enemies outside of it can't. There's minimal to no interaction outside of your screen. (I was thinking a lot of Celeste while playing this, how each screen in Celeste is a challenge that must be overcome one at a time.)

Anyway, in the original screen, Abe's movements were exact. If you pushed forward, he moved forward 1 unit. If you held down sneak, he snuck forward 1 unit. If you tapped roll forward, he rolled forward 1 unit. And if you ran, he traversed by whole units. This probably to some degree related to the use of a d-pad on PS1--but also that precision was necessary for the challenges you faced. You had to trust that Abe was going to jump to where he was supposed to, move where he was supposed to, and that "luck" was minimal to non-existent. It allowed level challenges that were very tricky, but if you figured out the right pattern of moves, you could get through it.

New 'n' Tasty lost that completely.

Instead of having set screens that have to be loaded, the game follows Abe like most 2D side scrollers would. Because of this, it's hard to know what the boundaries are. You can take over sligs, right--but in the original, sometimes the sligs would run off the screen and sometimes they'd stay. This set a parameter for the challenge you faced--can you take over this slig or not? Since there's no screens--it's hard to know when a slig is going to stay in range and when they're not. Same with the drones that zap you. Am I out of range or in range? It made each challenge a bit more organize, but that also meant there were many uncontrollable factors playing into success.

This was made worse by the controls.

As I said, the original had Abe moving in predictable units. No matter where you jumped, rolled, ran, walked--Abe would always stop at specific points on the screen--allowing you to plan tricky jumps and maneuvers. NnT allows the player to move slowly, quickly, or somewhere in between. You never quite know where Abe is going to stop. And, the greatest sin, physics seem to have a play. In the original, moving meant Abe moved immediately. But in this, Abe often has to build up momentum. This makes timing really tricky. You have to account for the build up and animations. It's like in the Crash Bandicoot remakes. In the original games, pressing jump made Crash jump immediately. In the remake there was a windup where crash had to bend down before jumping. Meaning you had to press jump a split second before you intended to. making jmping horribly imprecise. Same thing here.

One of the worst things, there's only one jump button. In the original, you could push up to jump straight up, or push triangle to jump forward. That meant you could push a button and know the result. Depend on it, even. But now I have to press forward to jump forward. And if I don't push it correctly, Abe could take a step or two before jumping--leading to my death about 100 times. This was especially frustrating at the end, where I kept dying from the imprecise controls and momentum build up. This was also really annoying when possessing a slig. They weren't as responsive as the original, so tricky sections often required me to think ahead. I wasn't able to react to things, because if you were reacting you were already too far behind. You had to know, ahead of time, what you needed to do because every action needed to be activated a few split seconds before they were expected to be executed.

This honestly made the game nearly unenjoyable.

The other issue is the story. The story and cut scenes in the original are near perfect. I rewatched a little bit and saw that some of the cut scenes had been changed. There's a great slap stick moment in the original when Abe falls into a meat barrel. As he's flicking off goo, he hits his head on a low hanging pipe. As Abe falls back into the barrel, he passes two sligs that would have killed him immediately on sight. It's a silly moment that adds some fun. These things seemed to be missed or not as well timed in the remake. The original's story was just so tight and precise (like the controls) that it didn't leave wondering what was happening, or why.

That's all I really have to say. It was awesome to see this game get a facelift, but the controls and curious storytelling decisions cause it fall behind the original in the key areas that make the game great. So the the pretty 3D graphics come at a cost.

#Zach's Game Journal #COMPLETED #Oddworld: New 'n' Tasty #Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee New 'n' Tasty #Video Games #Gaming #PC Gaming

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mightyaphrodytee · 1 year

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There were a few times in my life when music changed for me—what I responded to changed slowly over time, but yeah, there were definite infusions of NEW that veered off on paths maybe not so well-trodden, but that nonetheless stood out as touchstones in my ~~~dramatic half-whisper~~~ journey through 🎶MUSIC 🎼

1977: Heard the best of what’s now considered “classic rock” as it existed at the time, when it was just called “Rock” or “Heavy Metal” or “Prog.” Bands like Rush, Boston, Yes, Queen, Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, Pink Floyd, that didn’t get a lot of airplay on the Top 40 stations I’d exclusively listened to. It was thrilling. I caught up on ten years of ignorance in like, 9 months. But I kinda missed out on punk because of that immersion, thanks to my new besties.

1982: Heard my first indie/alternative (“new wave” to some) music and fell hard. The Cure, The English Beat, Joy Division, Kim Wilde, Elvis Costello, U2, Talking Heads, etc. when we moved to Colorado. The availability of some truly esoteric indie music via the Boulder station KBCO was legendary. We had three or four stations in addition to that one! Spoiled! The eighties, man. R.E.M.!!! The music in the clubs was what was on the radio was what was on MTV—you couldn’t escape it, so this huge subset of the rock-listening population were all listening to the big hits at the same time. Madonna, Dire Straits, The Eurythmics, Prince, Duran Duran, Pretenders, Bon Jovi. EVERYBODY knew the hits of the eighties.

1991: Heard “Smells Like Teen Spirit” on the car radio driving through Austin, and both my companion and I were immediately silenced by that intro, and by the end, we were like “What just happened?” just in total delight/light shock…did he really just scream about a mulatto? Who talks like that in 1991, sir? But we just immediately knew this was gonna be huge, and it was, and then came grunge and grunge-lite for the rest of the decade. Soundgarden, STP, Bush, Incubus, Alice In Chains, Pearl Jam, Nirvana (for such a goddamned short time, it’s insane to look back and realize we had so few years with him!)

For some people, life is unbearable without having their consciousness altered in some way. Drugs being one of those ways.

2003: Heard “Caring Is Creepy” by The Shins on a 4-hour “New Alternative” loop XM Radio had handed out as a free trial. Those songs on that loop woke me up to the possibility of new sounds that hit that same place in me as the best of the 80’s and 90’s. I remember Doves “Pounding”, which was used in an episode of The Consultant on Amazon Prime just this week (I shrieked!), “Silver Spoon” by Bis, “Shapes” by The Long Winters, The Postal Service, Death Cab For Cutie…wish I could remember them all. Bruce Springsteen’s Magic album had a song that was my most played for a few years in the aughts—“Radio Nowhere”, which I first heard on that XM trial loop and loved so much I bought the whole album. On iTunes. Still have it. Saw Garden State, heard “Caring Is Creepy” on the soundtrack (again—i shrieked!), and “New Slang,” and fell for them even harder.

Now I listen to what I used to hate (classic rock), but my fairly narrow preference window means I don’t SAY I listen to classic rock, because except for YouTube, I only listen to Radiohead, some Tool, some Metallica most days.

My life is now just mainly Radiohead with a few dollops of all the songs I’ve loved before, from every decade that rock and roll has been rock and roll with ALL its subgenres, heavy on Tool and Metallica as of late.

I can’t even tell what popular music today even is. It all sounds like video game background to me.

Will you still need me

Will you still feed me

When I’m 64?

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urlocalnonbinarybastardwrites · 3 months

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Heyyy 👋 I’m literally copy and pasting this from my Google doc because I wanna make this as detailed as possible, lmao. Sorry in advance for the venting.

Alright, to start off - My name is Emerson. I identify as genderqueer with exclusively they/them pronouns, and I’m also on the aromantic spectrum with a preference towards men/masc- presenting people. To clarify, I can feel romantic attraction, it just takes a lot of time for me to fully open up and be emotionally vulnerable enough for that connection to start.

My appearance is pretty plain, I think. When I was younger, I used to wears lots of dresses and skirts and cutesy clothing, but now I’ve settled on the same five sweatpants and three sweaters to wear interchangeably throughout the week. I wouldn’t say I have a certain ‘aesthetic’ or ‘style’, I just wear whatever’s comfortable and convenient. I’m Chinese, so my hair and eyes are both dark. I’ve been growing my hair out since I was a kid, so it goes down to my butt. My skin tone is fair, and I also wear square thin-frame glasses.

As much as I’d like to say I’m a friendly person, I can’t truly guarantee it. I tend to go stiff and quiet when someone is paying attention to me, which I’m sure has made lots of my classmates feel wary of me. When I know someone is looking and listening, I go through a series of conversation starters and responses like a video game catalogue, and I zone out while I do so because I’m desperately trying to figure out what persona I should put on in order to make the best impression. I’ve been like this since childhood, and my therapist says it’s likely due to my autism - I’m perceptive to the point where I physically can’t help being empathetic to anyone and everyone, and I hate the feeling of disappointing/discomforting people due to my intense desire to keep things calm and peaceful. Since I grew up as a middle child of divorced parents, I was ‘The Fixer’. When my baby sibling needed to be looked after, I watched him. When my mom was upset by something my dad did, I took care of the chores so she could have a break. When my dad got upset after an argument with my relatives, I hugged him and silently listened as he told me I’m his favorite. It used to make me happy to hear him say that, but now it’s like rotten fruit on my tongue. If I’m completely honest, most of my personality directly stems from my trauma. I’m attentive because I seek validation through being reliable. I’m observant because I never want to miss a sign that could mean somebody is feeling upset. I’m randomly enthusiastic because I need to boost the room’s spirit when nobody else will. But when I’m on my own or zoned out, I’m as quiet as a mouse. A dead one, in fact. Sometimes I actually forget to breathe because I’m so fixated on controlling my body language

On the upside, I’m really loyal?? The downside to that is I can be obsessive, so..

Even my hobbies kinda reflect my sad life style, lmao. I’m a huge shut-in who hates going out, and I’m constantly on my phone. Whether it’s to listen to music, play games or read fanfics, I’m always finding a way to escape reality. I hardly do anything else, but I enjoy a good true crime podcast while I’m drawing.

Some fun facts about me

I have a sad-looking RBF, according to my dad

I have a cow plushie that my older sibling got me for my 13th birthday (I still cuddle with it every night)

My favorite book genres are fantasy, adventure, drama

I’ve had several girlfriends before I realized I’m gay as shit

My usual playlist is as follows;

Monster by YAOSOBI

Racing Into The Night by YAOSOBI

Ghost City Tokyo by yama

a.m.3:21 by yama

Haru no tsugeru by yama

YELLOW by Yoh Kamiyama

Hong Yeon (Red Ties) by Raon

Darling by Raon

Overdose by Raon

The Vampire by DECO*27

Lost Umbrella by inabakumori

Lagtrain by inabakumori

Aishite Aishite Aishite by Kikuo

Love Ka by Ado

Loveit by bizxZERA

—————

I would like the Texas Chainsaw Masscre, Scream or Outsiders fandom. I really enjoy your writing, so any one of them is fine. Hope you have a good weekend (where I am, it’s Saturday)

(Also you wrote a lot so I’m giving you an analysis, and you are so self aware bro, PS sorry this took sooo long!)

Your Fandom Ship: Darry Curtis

Explanation: just start off with your looks I think that number one you would be insanely attracted to Darry if you’re into more masculine or presenting people because I think he’s like the most masculine I mean, I know people say that supposed to be Winston but I honestly see dairy is the most masculine of the group and I think that you guys would make well for each other with that as for your appearance I think that he’s a traditional guy so I think that you would definitely shocking at first I mean with you you know being gender fluid at all and I think that you would definitely catch his eye and that’s probably how he initially met. You is whenever you were probably walking around the street and he was like whoa I have never seen anyone look like that and then he probably like, wanted to talk to you, but be scared to offend you or anything. I also think that you would work out really well because I can’t really see him being the type of person that would be attracted to someone in the moment that he meets them. I feel like he would need to be like best friends with a person for a very long time before he actually became you know attracted slowly to them. I definitely don’t think he’s the type of guy that would see a person on a street and You know be instantly attracted to them wether sexual or romantic. I’ve always kind of headcanon him as being the type of guy to really need to get to know someone before being attracted to them because he just feels like the relationship is more empty and fake if he doesn’t really know someone before diving into something. I think he would definitely love the way you look and he put similar efforts into his style also known as relatively no effort because you know he’s always tired. He has work. He hast to take care of his kid brothers. He doesn’t want to put that much effort into way he dresses so he totally understands if you don’t either and I don’t feel like he would be someone to judge or patronize you for that and I also think that he loves your long hair he would love if you let him play with it if you weren’t into that sort of thing, he would respect it, but he would be a little bit angry about. I’m mostly kidding, but part of me is not because I think that he would love your hair and he thinks your glasses are pretty adorable. I also have this minor head canon that pony boy needed glasses whenever he was a kid, but they couldn’t afford them, so he’s a little bit blind sometimes but anyway, I think he would find years adorable and think that they really suit your face. I think he would also audibly gasp whenever you take them off for night because he’s always so used to seeing you with them on. I don’t think he would mind your lack of friendly gestures whenever you first meet because he definitely understands that it can be hard to do that especially whenever you’re being overwhelmed by someone new that you don’t understand an art familiar with yet and I think that his loudness would contrast perfectly with your quietness and I’m not saying that he’s a particularly loud person but I’m saying he’s so loud. He’s loud enough that your dynamic could actually work well. I also think that he would be one of the few people to observe the fact that he can tell that you’re doing slightly auto pilot responses to whatever he asked to say he was able to tell that you weren’t fully invested in the conversation, he noticed the subtle things like whenever your eyes get a little bit clouded whenever you’re looking at him because you aren’t really Looking at him sure you’re not focused on him and I feel like he would be one of the few people that would try to pull you out of that and say I’m real. I’m here. Don’t try to be who you think I’ll like. Be yourself. I don’t think a lot of the other greeters would make an effort to do that or even notice and I think that he’s one of the few that would, he’s used to taking care of others that he does really tiny things like that and if you wanted to, he would try to help you and if he didn’t, he would trust you to try and improve it upon yourself.

I also think he would understand your people pleasing tendencies because soda pop is a similar way to be familiar with behavior. You’re not disappointing me you’re not disappointment. You’re good enough for me. You’re good enough in general and I’m really proud of you for the effort that you made. nurturing instinct I guess because he’s been so used to that he would notice these small things and I think he would also see kind of bits and pieces of you and his brothers and vice versa and it makes it a lot easier for him to take care of you because he can kind of understand you through them if that makes some sort of sense. another thing I feel like would pair you guys really well together is the fact that you were the middle child having to take care of everyone and he’s the older sibling having to take care of everyone he understands the duties and he understands adults, abusing the fact that they think you’re different and you can handle everything when you really can’t because you’re just a person just like them you can’t handle the weight of the entire family. It’s really really hard to work and work constantly and never feel like you’re good enough and I feel like that’s a feeling only few of us can understand that he would be able to understand and connect with you about, while I don’t feel like he’s the greatest to talking about his feelings or his past childhood trauma with you. I feel like he would be able to find that connection with you if that makes sense like you guys kind of understand it just by looking in each other in the eyes as cheesy as that sounds without even having to talk about it in detail. I think he would also find your loyalist endearing and I don’t think he would ever really be bothered by your obsessiveness unless it goes too far but I think you guys establish boundaries pretty early into the relationship so you know what’s too far and what’s not. But I really think down to the core. You guys have a great dynamic together because you’re so similar yet so different and you bounce each other out in a great way you guys kind of are gravitated towards one another because you’ve had similar experiences and feel the similar pressures that no one else can really understand and yet you guys are different in the aspects of him being more people pleaser being less people pleaser you have differences and similarities and overall, I think you would make a very, very good couple. I feel like he is more of an introvert himself like he can go out, but I feel like that’s not what he prefers so you guys would definitely have the cutest little indoor dates of just chilling, watching movies and things like that and if you went into obsessive rants over a movie or anything like that he would be fascinated and definitely try to add onto the conversation and it would just be the most adorable little thing ever and I have a feeling he probably insisted on reading one of your fanfiction one time and you cringed so hard when he started reading it out loud. He also really loves your drawings and I feel like true crime podcast with freak him out a little bit and he would definitely be like how the hell do you listen to that shit? But if you were listening while you were probably too distracted to pay attention because he would definitely be an Uplifter of your art and always be complementing it even if it’s not your best work he would actually like it is and I think he would really really admire you to the core and he would be sure to definitely always show it off to the gang unless you didn’t want him to. Also, when you first met, he thought that you’re resting bitch face was pretty funny and he definitely asked you why you were sad and then you looked up at him and we’re really confused. 💚💚💚

I am so so so so so so so sorry for taking this long to complete this. I have been in a mess of events and I’ve kind of gotten burnt out after doing so many of these requests but I really wanted to do yours justice because of how much detail and effort you put into your ask. Not that many people go to those lakes to be that open and vulnerable about their childhood traumas and insecurities and you just do into it you, you understood the assignment just really thank you for letting me do this for you. Also excuse any grammatical errors I do use voice type to do these because I mean, I am not writing all that shit man but yeah so if anything sounds a little weird just try and put two and two together in your head.

#the outsiders #the outsiders hcs #the outsiders headcanons #urlocalnonbinarybastardwritesanswers #darry curtis

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faeassassin · 2 years

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When last we met...

I’m anticipating losing Twitter as a place to doomscroll, to vent, to find new people, to make new friends, and just in general be my weird self.

So, the last time I was really active on Tumblr I feel like I was a much different person. I started here while I was still known for writing anime fanfic. I’d had a few NaNoWriMo wins under my belt. I was a LiveJournal refugee.

And I played a lot of World of Warcraft.

a LOT of World of Warcraft

No, more than that. I was a pretty solidly hardcore raider when this account was new, then I broke up with my ex, ended up getting married to a guy I dated in high school, and became a filthy casual.

I loved it. I was completely enamored with WoW lore even without the raiding, I watched all the YT videos I could find that expounded on it, and never wanted it to end.

Then I found out the CEO of Blizzard was a sexual predator and I dropped WoW and Diablo like a hot potato.

I’d been working as a social media moderator for a company called ICUC for over six years. I got fired the morning after the Pulse shooting for speaking up for the safety of me and my team. Two years later I was working at Cognizant for a huge social media platform I am still technically not allowed to mention, and ended up with a giant case of PTSD that’s kept me from holding down a job since.

I lost my job, I lost my favorite game (and realized it was an autistic special interest of mine), and I was ready to remake myself.

Before I left that job I went out on a limb. See, I knew already that I could write awesome things that people enjoyed reading IF I could catch their attention. I’ve never lost my passion for telling stories, and I wanted to prepare an escape hatch for the nightmare I was living. I self published my first book five years ago this month. A book that was never a NaNoWriMo project. Just something I’d poked at for about ten years off and on. I had cover art. I had an editor. I had a dream. I had a little spare change to try to get noticed with a few (poorly planned) advertisements on Facebook.

I didn’t have ANY knowledge of what I was doing, I’d lost all touch with most of the people who used to be fans. I had crippling depression and growing symptoms of severe anxiety. (Physical symptoms. It was ugly.)

But what I DID have was a husband who was willing to try to make things work on one income while I started writing more books. I had a friend who happened to know a few things about graphic design who started making my cover art. I started making friends with other authors who pushed me toward better information on the business side of self publishing.

Now? I have six books published. I am proud of them. I am still writing (PTSD and grief and health issues willing, of course.) I turned to Minecraft to fill my gaming itch, and now I’ve found a new special interest in Empires SMP and Hermitcraft SMP videos. They fill that game lore void that had been sitting in my soul, and they’ve been inspiring my writing.

Also? Hi. I’m self-diagnosed autistic. Does it make any difference? Kinda. I’m still me, but it explains a LOT of my life and why I couldn’t understand why I felt so alone and couldn’t connect with anyone. Why everything was harder for me all the time, why I was so “sensitive” about everything, and...well. I could probably get a professional diagnosis, but it would be prohibitively expensive, and it wouldn’t do any good at all. Maybe some feeling of validation, I guess, but that’s about it. That’s not worth a thousand dollars out of pocket that I don’t have.

Long story short? I’m a different person now. I’m about to turn 48, and my life is a beautiful disaster. Nice to meet you again. If the Twittersphere burns down, I’ll settle in where I’ve already got roots.

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antique-ring · 2 years

Text

Macaque x reader Part 3

(Gender neutral reader)

Warnings? Non

He certainly didn’t feel the need to tie you up, but to simply have his tail wrapped around you nearly all times. If needed to do something, but needed you to stay, he would summon one of his shadows to do it instead. I mean, you did tell him you were only a delivery person, no martial arts training or anything.

From what you could tell he was getting ready to be underwater. You only knew that because he got you a diving suit… was he planning on dragging you everywhere? You honestly expected him to leave you in his little bunker with video games while he tried to kill your friends.

It’s not that you don’t care about him killing your friends, it’s just weird to bring your hostage everywhere you go. Did you even know how to swim? You took lessons when you were six but then your parents never took you near a body of water after that. Like do you even remember how? Shoot, are you gonna die?

He’s like immortal or something right? At least the great sage is, this guy might. Maybe he’s forgotten how fragile regular people are? That part stresses you out more that anything.

You kept to yourself in the corner for a while, he had some lego so you were playing with those. Fun fact, did you know the plural or lego is “lego,”kinda like deer and deer.

“Soooo.” You finally spoke up, after finishing you masterpiece. It kinda… looked like a duck, but art is subjective.

“Sooooo?” He replied, mimicking you.

“So like, are we swimming anytime soon? Cause like, it looks like you’re gathering stuff to do that.”

He turned his head to you and laughed. "Wonder what gave it away." "Shawty, I know you're being sarcastic and whatever... But Like..." He laughed at the nickname, he knew it wasn't anything serious but it made him oddly happy. You did seem to notice by his tail wagging.

He coughed, trying to regain his composure . He didn't fool you though.

" Your friends are heading to an ancient underwater city. I'm pretty sure mortals like you will drown. "

Why in all of us the west would he take you, his prisoner, along while he was on a murder mission? That seems like so much work. like the possibility of you escaping or getting rescued is extremely high, like dang, Is he stupid?

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just leave me here?” You questioned. Not like you wanted to remain a hostage but you’re too curious about this now.

He shrugged, “I can’t have you running away when I’m out. My shadows will disappear when I get too far away.” You weren’t sure if you believed him on that, but you didn’t think he had any reason to lie. FUCK!

MR.MONKEY MAN SIR SUSSY WUSSY EMO MONKEY MONKEY MAN.

“Anyway, I need to run and get dinner don’t go anywhere.” He let out a wide smile and hummed as he left. Well… you looked at his little shadow clone, they didn’t talk so they aren’t the best company. You start playing with lego because what else were you to do?

You were playing with catapult with this specific set and flung a bolder. “Shit.” You realized you had hit the mechanism a little too hard and the plastic bolder rolls across the room. The shadow monkey was sure to keep you in place, still, you tried to get reach over to get it.

Leaning closer and closer, adjusting your body some more, more and more leaning… you got it? Shouldn’t the-? You looked over to see the shadow monkey gone. “Macaque?” You let out, your voice echoed through the building. “Did he get out of range?”

What to do now that you weren’t confined to the corner?

………

SHIT THE DOOR!

You ran over to the slab of metal on the wall and to your surprise, opened it? “Silly monkey man.” You muttered to yourself.

But, the new problem was that you were in the middle of nowhere. IN THE MIDDLE OF OF THE OCEAN? Great, great.

You sigh in defeat and close the door to go back to your spot on the floor with Lego. But the scuba gear sitting on the table seemed awfully convenient now... Too Convenient You have come to the conclusion that Macaque wasn't that smart... You threw all of the gear on, doing several test to make sure everything was hooked up correctly. You slammed the door back open to look at the vast waters in front of you, It was honestly terrifying; not as terrifying as Lady Bone Demon though.

Doing a few breathing exercises beforehand, you finally plunge into the water. You looked around to see if you could find an area where the land rises, hoping to at least find an island. But no! You see the broken ship you were practically thrown off of!

Hi sorry It took me so long to get the next part out! Life has been crazy. I graduated trade school and moved within a two week time span. But I'll try to update as much as I can. Thank you for the support on the last two parts and thank you for being patient with me! <3

#lmk #macaque x reader #lego macaque #monkie kid macaque #six eared macaque #lego monkie kid #lego #lego monkie kid x reader

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thelovelylolly · 2 years

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Howdy! Can I request a platonic headcanon between a teen!s/o and Matt Murdock? Basically this teen likes doing parkour late at night despite the dangers, but one night they ended up in a wrong place and wrong time when they witness some kind of mafia movement and also Daredevil was there as well. And basically this becames a whole survival game of cat and mouse, the plot I'll gave it to you cause I'm not good in imagining one, if you can make this if is not a bother that is. Thank you for reading this though!

Hardcore Parkour

Summary : One night during your usual parkour adventures, you see something that you didn't expect to see. Warnings : None that I can think of :) Notes : This is such a fun idea, I love it! Thank you for requesting it! I did write it kinda late at night and in one go because i wanted to get this out as soon as i could for you, so excuse any typos or anything of the sort!

Ever since you saw the trends of parkour online, you were immediately hooked. You studied the videos and taught yourself how to do it. You started off just on the roof of your aunt's apartment building. Simple flips and jumps and such.

As you improved more and more, you ventured off into your neighborhood of Hell's Kitchen. It started with going to your neighboring rooftops then to the alleyways between buildings as well. Soon enough, you were jumping from building to building, alley to alley. You'd say you were pretty good at parkour, matching the professionals in the videos almost.

But with school and responsibilities and your overbearing aunt, you could only parkour at night. Or at least, parkour around Hell's Kitchen at night.

You knew it was dangerous. You had heard about the crazy high crime rates in Hell's Kitchen and you heard about Daredevil, but you didn't really care. The chance of you running into Daredevil and crime is so small.

Though, it's still a chance.

"I'll be back soon, love ya!" You called as you left your aunt's apartment.

"Be safe!" You heard your aunt call back as you closed the door.

You smiled before running up to the roof top. The sun was set and the nightlife of Hell's Kitchen had emerged. You zipped up your hoodie and made sure your shoes were tied. With a running start, you jumped to the next building over with a flip.

You continued your way down the block then jumped down some fire escapes to get into the alleyway system. You jogged around to the next block and started to climb up the side of the building until you heard something.

It was muffled so you crept closer, carefully moving against the brick wall until you were at it's corner.

"L-listen I can p-pay you back! J-just give me-"

"You've had enough time, pal. We've given you three extensions and that wasn't enough."

Loan sharks, praying on an innocent person. It made you sick to think that people would harm others just for money, or even for fun.

"I think you pay us back now or you can pay with something a little more," the man paused and guns clicking echoed through the alleyway, "vauable."

You gasped as you peered around the corner, only to realize how loud it was. You clamped your hand over your mouth.

"What was that?"

"Someone was watching us, sir."

"Don't just stand there, go find them!"

You took off running with the loan sharks on your tail. You ran through the system, the maze of alleyways in hopes you could lose them. You ran into a dead end, or what anyone else would see as a dead end.

The tall fence was easily a foot taller than you. Luckily, there was a dumpster beside it so you backed up a few steps. You ran and jumped up on the dumpster before jumping over the fence. The loansharks turned the corner as soon as you got over the fence.

You stopped to listen to make sure they wouldn't follow you. Instead a thud followed by groans and grunts came from over the fence. You waited, and quiet fell upon the alley way. You watched as a figure jumped over the fence just like you did. But you recognized the suit.

Daredevil.

"Oh my god," you muttered.

"Kid-"

You didn't even give him the chance to speak before running away. He groaned and followed you. You ran around back to your block and to a random fire escape. He kept following you, but he paused as you scaled the building. When you reached the top, you flipped on to it.

He kept an ear on you as he climbed up another fire escape in hopes of catching you off guard. He followed the sound of you quick steps and jumps as you went from building to building.

Finally, he reached the top of the building he was climbing. He tilted his head to the side before jumping to the building next to him.

You thought you had lost Daredevil as you jumped to your apartment building. That was until he jumped over and tackled you.

You wiggled out of his protective grip but instead of running away again, you stood there. "Why are you following me?" You asked.

"Because you're a kid out, jumping around the streets at night! Do you understand how dangerous that is?" He replied, stepping closer.

"What are you, my dad? I don't need someone watching over me as I do what I want!"

"You got chased down by loan sharks tonight! They had guns, they could've killed you."

"But they didn't," you answered, sticking your hands in your pockets. You turned and walked to the door that led inside, but he grabbed your arm and spun you around.

"You need to be safer. I don't care if you keep jumping around, but not when there are criminals walking aorund," he said, your arm still in your grip.

"Let me go, dude. I'm not some little kid who needs a babysitter!"

You pulled your arm away from him and opened the door.

"Just be safe, okay?"

"Sure thing, Mr. Daredevil," you answered, with a fake little salute. You closed the door behind you and walked down to your aunt's apartment. You opened the door and walked in.

"How was your run, honey?" You aunt asked as you locked the door behind you.

"It was fine. I ran into this weird guy though," you said as you took off your hoodie and walked to your room.

"He didn't do anything to you, did he?"

"No, auntie, he didn't do anything. He was wearing a stupid costume though."

#matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock fanfiction #daredevil x reader #daredevil x you #daredevil fanfiction

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fruitoftheweek · 3 years

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Little Cherry Book:

Chapter 4:Showered in Sin

Chapter 1 Here / Chapter 2 Here / Chapter 3 Here

Hey guys! I'm sorry that it has taken so long for me to update this. I had an idea of what I was going to write but I had a super hectic week so I wasn't able to write this till now. In order to make up for it, I have given you a treat. A 6,502 word chapter. It kinda beat my ass but I had so much fun writing it. It's sweet, it's spicy, it's all the goodness you guys deserve. I was listening to Duvet by Boa while writing this and I think you should too for two reasons. One, it helps set the mood, but also oh my fucking god it's such a good song. Also, Boa is just a fucking great band. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and message me if you would like to be added to the tag list! Love you guys

Pairing: Spencer Reid X reader

Chapter Plot: After a game of drunk never have I ever after a long case, Morgan locks Spencer out of their shared room. Shenanigans ensue and you and Spencer share a couple of firsts.

Series TW: 18+, smut, degradation, piercing, choking, knife play, mommy/daddy kinks, spanking, exhibitionism, Will update as time goes on

Chapter TW: smut, slight mommy kink, having body piercings, choking, slight blood kink (not really, it's just hard to explain), Shared masturbation (male and female receiving), pleading, multiple orgasms, cumming in pants, shower sexiness, aftercare

Word Count: 6,502

Your deep cherry lipstick painted the white seal of the wine bottle you held in your hand as you laughed at something Elle said. Spencer couldn't help but let a small smile pass his lips as he took in your form, hot from the day's work, small strands of your hair sticking to your forehead, a dewy glow illuminating your rosy cheeks.

After a long week, they had found Carl Arnold before he had been able to kill the Dunken family and even coerced a confession out of him. With spirits running high, Elle had suggested some much-needed relaxation before taking off the next day. Since you were rooming alone, you volunteered to host in your room. Morgan had arrived at your hotel room with two bottles of some sort of liquor, one clear and one amber, JJ trailing in toe with your bottle of red wine you had asked for. You pulled out your little corkscrew with the face of an old man on it, knowing she hated his weird little face. You brought it with you on trips, just in case the occasion arose.

And it did arise as Elle suggested a drinking game. Hotch had retired early after calling Hailey to get an update on his very pregnant wife, while Gideon preferred the solitude of a good book late at night. The rest of you sat on the floor surrounded by drinks and snacks. With the supervision gone, it almost felt like a high school party with no parents. You all had all settled on a classic, never have I ever. "We haven't played this in a long time because we already know so much about each other, but it's fun when we have a newbie around," Morgan said giving you a cheeky smile and bumping your shoulder. Already pliable after the couple of drinks you had while Elle explained the game, you nodded before tipping your lips to the cusp of Spencer's ear. "I'll try not to make it too hard for you, pretty boy," you said. The small puffs of air that left your mouth made Spencer's hair stand on end and his feet curl.

He knew you were teasing him that night and he loved it. He decided to keep his knees tucked to his chest for the rest of the night as to not expose the predicament in his pants. He watched the way you lightly sucked on the wine bottle as you tipped it back, a thin river of cabernet leaking from the corner of your lips and trailing down your neck. Spencer wanted nothing more than to lean over and lap it off of you just to see how you would react, but he knew it was the drinks talking. Despite your earlier comment, it was quite obvious that you were targeting him as his head started to spin gently.

"Never have I ever had sex with someone much older than me," Garcia said through her video feed with a cheeky smirk. Derek had insisted on including her even though she wasn't physically present. She sat bundled up in a comfy blanket in her office with a mug of some sort of alcoholic beverage. "HEY! No targeting! Plus, I told you that in confidence at ladies night. How much is much older?" You said, swaying your bottle towards the computer set up on the floor."You know how much older I mean sweetheart." Garcia said with a giggle as you groaned and took a sip."How much older is much older?" Morgan said with a cocked eyebrow, somewhere between impressed and surprised." I was a college student, experimenting with my professor. Not like an old man, but he was 20 years older than me. Definitely not my style anymore though." You said with a grimace remembering him.

Spencer had learned a lot about your sex life during that game, but some part inside of him smirked, knowing that the rest of the team would never know you as he knew you, not unless they too had read your journal. It was the only thing keeping his head clear of the idea of you with anyone else. Not that you were with him in any capacity, but the idea still made him feel something in his stomach. Not the sweet butterflies that came with your smile, but something more like idiotic hornets dangerously bumping against the walls of his stomach.

Spencer hadn't even noticed the uproar of everyone else around the circle at your comment and the second revelation that Morgan had drunk too. He was too busy watching how you had shyly tucked your hair behind your ear, finally letting it down out of your clips for once. You were wearing your pajamas, just a tank top, slouchy sweater, and flannel pajama pants, but somehow you looked more radiant than ever. He had come back down to earth after hearing someone call his name."Y-Yes?" He sputtered out, realizing you had been trying to get his attention."It's Morgan's turn, pay attention." You said, gently smacking your hand down on his thigh.

If he was riled up before, he was unbelievably undone at the slight sting from where your palm had just been. Light enough that it wasn't noticeable, but hard enough that it erupted a Shockwave through his body, centered on the location of the contact. He bit back the whimper threatening to escape his lips as he turned towards Morgan, trying desperately to not watch you from the corner of his eye.

"Never have I been a virgin at 24," Morgan said, beaming in his direction. Spencer took a big gulp from his glass of whiskey."You always do that one, I don't know why you think it's so funny, you're just trying to get me to drink" he said abashedly. He looked over at you, nervous for your reaction, but you seemed unfazed. "Hey, that's a wonderful gift to have, there's something so special about virgins. Maybe it's the idea that everything is new, but I like it. I love virgins." You said, taking a sip from your bottle, gently swaying. You had given up on never have I ever and just decided to drink whenever you felt like it. Maybe it was because you were tipsy, maybe it was the warm flush that decorated Spencer's cheeks, maybe it was the way he was looking at you with sultry, half-lidded eyes. You couldn't tell, but something made you want to find an excuse for you two to be alone.

"Geese, we seemed to have caught a succubus tonight." Morgan quipped."A suck-you-what now?" You said, cocking an eyebrow at him. " A succubus, it's a demon or supernatural entity in folklore, in female form, that appears in dreams to seduce men, usually through sexual activity. According to religious traditions, repeated sexual activity with a succubus can cause poor physical or mental health, even death. In modern representations, a succubus is often depicted as a beautiful seductress or enchantress, rather than as demonic or frightening." Spencer shot out. "Wow, even when you're drunk, your big brain keeps chuggin' along," you said, sloppily ruffling his hair "A beautiful seductress or enchantress, huh?" That time it came out low, inaudible to the others, but it pierced Spencer like a knife."Do you think that's accurate bout me?" you asked, staring up into his eyes, closer than you have been before. Spencer let a cartoonish gulping noise escape his lips as he held back his urge to lean into your touch.

"Ah, it's my turn," you said, leaning back into your spot in the circle and sadly, away from Spencer." Never have I ever done something naughty at our work," you said, looking straight at Spencer "I'll know if you're lying, I can sniff out a liar from a mile away," your cocky smirk leaking out of your mouth. Everyone except you and JJ took a shot."Wow, really you guys? Even you Spence? " JJ said in disbelief, looking around the circle."Never have I ever, my ass" Spencer mumbled under his breath, just loud enough for you to hear, looking over at you, thinking about your pantieless escapades.

"Look at that, Doctor Reid, you need another drink, let me go fix you one," You said as you grabbed his glass in one hand, leaning and gripping hard into his shoulder with the other. It wasn't seen by the others, but between that and the fiery look in your eyes, it sent an obvious message,' keep your mouth shut or I'll shut it for you.' You used him as leverage to get up, nearly pushing him over as you gracefully stumbled to the hotel fridge. He knew what you meant, but he didn't care, your grip on him went straight into his imagination as he envisioned what that grip would feel like in other places. He kind of wanted to push his luck, just so he could see what he had in store.

And push it he did as you handed him the glass, reminding him that it was indeed his turn to play never have I ever. "Never have I ever slept with my professor," He said, obviously targeting you with a glint of mischief in his eyes."Oh yeah, well never have I ever been a virgin at 24." You said, swaying as you sat down."Morgan already said that, dummy. Never have I ever worn stupid dark red lipstick" He retorted, equally as drunk as you. At this point everyone else had zoned you two out and were focused on other things, refreshing their drinks, counting the ceiling tiles, humming a sloppy rendition of My My Miss American Pie, or in Penelope's case, all three."Yeah, well never have I ever been a complete and utter mommas boy!" You continued, the statement turning Spencer beet red. You watched him clench and unclench his hands, you had obviously struck a nerve. Just as you were about to apologize, he cut you off. "Never have I ever had nipple piercings!" He shouted, pointing at your chest, now drawing attention to the obvious balls framing your nipples that you had once been covered by your long-forgotten sweater.

As he said it, it felt like the world went in slow motion. You could see the instant regret on his face as you dropped your bottle in surprise. It had landed on Spencers discarded whiskey glass and both shattered, wine and whiskey mixing with glass to create a slurry on the ground between them. "Fuck! You Guys!" Morgan said, "You got it all over my clothes." "Me too," Echoed Elle as they both stood up in their soaked clothes. "I think that calls it a night." JJ said, closing the laptop on the image of an already sleeping Garcia." Bye you guys, sleep well," you called after them as you and Spencer rushed around looking for towels to clean up the alcohol with.

"Ow! Son of a bitch!" Spencer cried as you dropped the last of the glass in the garbage can. As you rounded the corner, you saw Spencer pulling a rather large shard of glass that you must have missed out of his thumb, blood pooling at the tip. Without thinking, you crouched down and sucked his thumb into your mouth." A-ah! What... What are you doing!?" Spencer asked breathlessly, looking down at you with a deep hunger in his eyes. You pop off his thumb and squeeze it at the base, slowing the blood flow."Shut up," You said," This helps slow the bleeding. The sucking applies pressure. My mom used to do this for me... And no, do not psychoanalyze that." You said, wrapping your mouth around his finger, sucking to provide some pressure to slow the blood flow. You could taste the iron in your mouth, but you didn't mind, knowing you were helping your friend.

You were helping alright, helping in more ways than you would ever understand. "Yeah, like I'm the only one here with mommy issues," he said distractedly, too busy surveying your lips wrapped around him. You slapped your hand down on his thigh once more, eliciting a small whimper from him. He couldn't help it, you were a sight of beauty, you always were, but looking down on you right then, Spencer wanted to bottle that moment forever. The tops of your breasts peeking out from the top of your tank top, your eyes filled with a hazy glow, looking up at him to make sure he was ok, and your cheeks hollowing out around his thumb as you delicately sucked on his wound. It was as close as Spencer had ever gotten to anything sexual. He could feel your tongue swirling around the cut, lapping up the last couple drops of blood. He couldn't help but imagine what it would be like if it was another appendage and not his thumb. You sucked on his thumb one last time, harder than you had previously, and before he even knew what he was doing, his hips bucked up, rubbing his hard cock against his pajama pants, finally relieving his mounting orgasm.

You let go of his finger with a pop as your tongue trailed off of the underside of his thumb. Spencer looked anywhere but you, as a wet patch formed through his thin underwear and pajama pants. He hurried to cover it with his sweater, shooting up from his seated position."Um, Um, I'm g-gonna go shower and go to bed." He said, hurriedly scurrying over to where he had left his room key." Sorry partner, I saw Morgan accidentally grab both of your keys on the way out. He's probably asleep by now." You said languidly, leaning back to take in the sight of the soft boy in front of you. Totally flushed with heat, small beads of sweat peppering his forehead, his hands twiddling suspiciously into his sweater in an attempt to conceal crotch, trying and failing miserably to hide his rapidly cooling cum.

He whined a little, lighting a fire in you. He looked so thoroughly fucked out, and all you had done was suck his finger. You knew that you just had to play with him some more. "You know, you can use my shower, doctor." You said, and he let out a small sigh of relief, heading towards the bathroom. "There is one condition, though," You smirked coyly as he halted his motions, his body facing away from you. It was almost as if he was ready to run away at any moment. You walked over to him, slowly, taking your time to tease him. The silence hung heavy in the air as you looked up into his eyes questioningly, waiting for him to ask. "Wh-what is the condition." He said, unable to return your gaze, hands fisted in the hem of his sweater, pulling it down even further. You smirked, dipping your hands up and under his sweater, nearly brushing his spent cock before gently placing them on his bare stomach, just above his waistband. He sucked in a tight breath as you gently swirled your fingers in the short hair that lead from his belly button down to happier places." Before I ask, do you know about the color scale?" you said, fingers smoothing out over his little stomach." Um, k-kinda?" He said, heat flushing his cheeks."Green means good keep going, yellow means slow down, and red means stop right now, ok?" You said, looking up at him as he nods."Come on pretty boy, I need verbal confirmation. I need to know that you understand, got it." You said with a little pinch to his tummy. "Y-Yes, I understand!" He blurted out, standing stiff as a board." Good boy. Now, for my condition. You can shower if you show me what you're hiding." You said, leaning close enough that if Spencer breathed, your chests would meet each other. "What color, Spencer?" you said, languidly drawing lines up and down his torso with your nails."G-Green, Very green." He sputtered out, finally meeting your eyes."That's what I like to hear, sweet boy." You said before your fingers danced below his waistline, now somewhat crusty from his cum."W-wait!" He says, just as you were about to take him in your hand. You instantly stopped and looked up at him gently."We can stop here baby, it's not a problem." You said, beginning to remove your hand from his pants. He grabbed your hand through his pants, stopping your movement."It-It's not that. I don't want to stop, I just want... well..." He said and looked down shyly. "What do you want baby, anything," You smiled up at him. "Um, I haven't had my first kiss yet and I kinda... Well... I kinda..." He said, shuffling his feet, face beet red. Your eyebrows shot up quickly in surprise before letting out a gentle smile."Do you want a kiss, pretty boy?" You said, gently brushing the hair out of his face. He nodded, and you grabbed his chin, bringing him close. "Use your words, pretty boy. What do you want?" You whispered, breath gently ghosting Spencer's lips as he took you in up close. He could see every little pore and dimple of your skin and every color hidden in the depth of your eyes and he knew he needed to have you.

He shakily leaned forward, lips gently meeting yours, so light that if you hadn't seen his actions, you wouldn't have even known if you had touched. You moved your hand down to his throat, giving a light squeeze."Come on genius, use your words," you said as he whimpered. "Please, can I kiss you, please, please?" He begged, leaning into your touch, pleading for you to squeeze again. His efforts shoot straight to your heart. You indulged him in a kiss, not as spicy as the situation would permit, more of a sweet heat. He came in too hot and heavy at first, but you kissed him languidly, gently stroking his cheek to get him in the rhythm. His arms were straight out at his sides, hands clenched as if he was willing every muscle in his body to not touch you.

You let out a small laugh as you melted into his kiss, soft, puffy lips dancing across yours. "You know you can touch me," You said, pulling back, smiling at the smear of your lipstick, now staining his lips, and the endearing puppy dog eyes he was giving you. "Where can I touch you?" He whispered out as if he were telling a secret. "Wherever you want, baby. Wherever your heart desires." You replied, bringing your arms up to wrap loosely around his neck, pulling your bodies closer. He was as stiff as a board as his hands flitted around trying to find a good place to land. He finally settled on weaving his arms around your waist and up to cradle your neck, gently carding his fingers through the hair that fell at the nape of your neck. There was something so sweet in the way he cradled your body with feather-light touches as if you would disappear like smoke if he lingered too long. You reveled in the feeling of you two pressed together, slightly uncomfortable at the stiff material of his pajama pants on your stomach.

"Hey sweetheart," You said, pulling away as he chased after your lips, "I'm feeling kinda sweaty from the day, would you like to join me in the shower? What color?" "G-green, yes please." He said, tentatively pressing a kiss to your collarbone, exposed as the strap of your tank top had fallen down. You unwound from him, taking his hand delicately in your own, instantly missing the warmth his body provided.

You lead him into the bathroom, carefully stepping over the wine-soaked towels discarded on the floor before shutting the door and turning to face him. "I don't want to take this too fast for you because I know it's all very new so always tell me how you are feeling and if everything is ok. I want this to be good for you baby, ok?" You said, squeezing his hand that was still intertwined with yours. "Ok, th-thank you," He said shyly.

"Now, what do you want to do first? You're probably pretty uncomfortable in those pants, do you want me to take them off you?" You said, hooking one of your fingers into his waistband, pulling on in slightly creating a much-needed separation between his sticky cock and his uncomfortable pants."Y-Yes please" He said as you turned on the shower, allowing it to warm up in preparation for cleaning him off before turning back to him. You gently grabbed the hem of his sweater and pulled it over his head, leaving him shirtless in front of you.

Lean muscles were hidden under a layer of peachy soft skin highlighting the gentle trail of dark curly hair leading from his belly button down past his pants. His arms curled around himself as he watched your eyes carefully, ready for some sort of judgment. "I know I'm not really that s-strong or anything but I can work on it-" You cut him off with a gentle kiss right above his belly button, startling him. You looked up sweetly into his eyes and gave him a soft smile, saying "You are so beautiful, Spencer. Morgan calls you pretty boy, but he truly has no idea. I would have you no other way than you are right now."

You gently peppered his chest with feather-light kisses, making him blush. He finally understood why people liked hickeys because as you trailed down his chest, the little wine red lipstick you had left on your lips left marks trailing down his chest. Some part of him wished they were permanent, showing off to all that could see, and they would know exactly who he belonged to. You dipped your hand into his waistband, asking, "What color?" "Green, very green," he choked out as your breath ghosted across his abdomen. You looked so beautiful, kneeled on the floor in front of him, taking care of him so gently and treating him so sweetly that he could feel his cock begin to harden again.

You looked up into his eyes as you pulled his pants down. He let out a soft sigh of relief as he was uncaged from his unfortunate trouser situation. His cock flipped down out of his pants, nearly smacking you in the forehead as you looked up at it in awe. Even though it was only semi-hard, it was bigger than any you had ever seen before. Spencer looked down at you shyly "it's not that much, I-I know but I've been researching techniques to make up for it in order to give sufficient pleasure for you- I mean for whatever partners I may have, not that I am saying that I won't please you, I dream of pleasuring you! ... I'm digging myself a hole aren't I."He rambled, rubbing the back of his neck worriedly. "Spencer, you are huge. Way more than I have ever had before. See?" You said, standing up, gently lifting his cock in your hand, measuring it against your stomach.

Maybe Spencer hadn't noticed because it was proportionate to his body and his big hands, but being held in your petite hands and measured against your stomach, he finally did see how much he would fill you up. The tip of his dick just barely reached past the gems that decorated your belly button piercing. "W-Woah." He said growing harder at the thought of pushing so deep into you. He looked up to your face, which was preoccupied with looking down at how far he would reach up in you.

Tearing your eyes away from him and up to his own, you flushed, knowing that he had caught you staring. "What would you like me to do next?" You spoke softly. Despite being the only two in the room, you two both talked in hushed tones, worrying that anything more than that would burst the delicate bubble you two had created. "Can we match?" He said, and you instantly understood him, despite the odd vernacular. You began to slip off your shirt, but he stopped you with an arm on your shoulder. "C-Can I do it?" He said shyly. "Of course, pretty baby," you barely get out before he drifted his hands under your tank.

He slowly lifted your top over your head as he took in the soft smooth feeling of your skin against his, goosebumps pricking up wherever his fingers trailed. You stood in front of him, shirtless as he took in your form. He had imagined what your breasts would look like. Nipples always hard due to your piercings, what your jewelry would look like, but nothing could prepare him for the glimmering moonstone gems that adorned your nipples and navel. Everything matched exactly, including the delicate necklace you wore around your neck.

The only thing he liked more than the perfection of your body was the features that made you, you. Some might call them imperfections, but to Spencer, all he could see in you was beauty. The gentle bruises on your skin from tangles with unsubs, the soft stretch marks that adorned your hips like little valleys and winding rivers, the slight blemishes, and hairs. He loved it because you were the embodiment of the confidence he wished for in himself. While he was always nervous about his body and how others perceived him, you loved yourself for exactly who you were, and you loved him for exactly who he was.

He pulled down your pants, gently following the twist and turn of the stretch marks as they winded down your hips, making sure to kneel down to pull them all the way off of you as you delicately stepped out, gently grabbing onto his hair to keep your balance as you swayed. He moaned softly at the gentle tug of your fingers while he stared up at you in awe. You took his hand in yours, coaxing him to stand.

You both stood there, taking in each other's forms for a moment, hands still connected as if by a thread at the pinky before you spoke. "We shouldn't waste water. Let me clean you off, sweetheart." He nodded before following after you into the gentle spray of the shower, steam now filling the room. He marveled at the way that the water droplets cascaded down your body, gently running down your curves. "Come here," you said, pulling him into a gentle embrace under the hot water.

Your two bodies pressed gently together, and Spencer couldn't help but think that you were molded for each other. Not in the way that a sculptor may stick two unmatched pieces of clay together with slip, more like one rock that had been split by the earth finally returning together. Something about your touch felt like home as you gently cradled him under the water.

He was so enthralled in your being that he didn't notice you gently scrubbing him with a washcloth until the scent of your body wash permeated the air. You gently scrubbed his back, washing off the sweat of the day and replacing it with you. He melted into you as your hands reached up, lathering his hair with shampoo. He wasn't sure if it was because he realized you should probably be getting washed too or because he desperately wanted to ride his hands along the planes of your body, but he decided to lather up his hands and wash you as well. "You are such a good boy. Thank you for cleaning me up" You said, resting your head gently on his chest, softly swirling the soap around his back, now finished scrubbing all you could from that angle, waiting to turn him around.

He moved carefully, avoiding your butt, still too nervous to touch. "Make sure you get everything, sweet boy. I like to be clean when I go to bed." You said, gently grabbing his hand and pulling it down to cup your butt. He inhales a sharp breath as he indulged in a gentle squeeze, continuing to wash you. He washed your back but his hands would occasionally drift down to your ass, growing more confident as he unknowingly rocked into you slightly with every squeeze, letting out soft keening noises.

You peeled yourself off of him as he rutted into the air, whining at the loss of friction. "Slow down, naughty boy. Bad boys don't get to touch. Are you a bad boy?" you asked as you placed a finger on the tip of his cock, swirling it in the precum pooling there despite the water's efforts to wash it off. "No, no! I'm a good boy! You're just so pretty, and you feel so good, and you smell so nice, and I wanna touch you, and I want you to touch me, please." He blurted out, looking at you with hungry eyes, begging for more friction. "Where do you want to touch me baby?" you asked as his eyes raked over your body, taking in all of his options. "I want to touch your boobies and your- your-" "My what? You can say it, naughty boy." You cut him off in his stammering. "Your pussy, I want to touch your pussy." He said, the hot water spreading the blush from his cheeks down his chest, tingeing his cock with a pretty pink hue. "What naughty words from such a pretty boy. You can touch-" he cut you off, lunging towards your body before you grabbed him by the throat, squeezing experimentally. Not too hard, not too soft. He moaned, and you felt the vibrations traveling up your hands."Let me finish what I was saying. Naughty boys don't get to touch. They get spanked." You said as he mewled." What I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted was that you can touch, AFTER I wash you and after you finish washing me. Only after, you got it?" you said, squeezing a little tighter. "Y-yes." he croaked out. "Good boy," you replied.

You washed out the shampoo in his hair, replacing it with conditioner as he did the same for you. You squirted more soap onto your washcloth, preparing to test him. You took the washcloth in your hand, slowly working over his legs, arms, and chest, teasingly brushing over his overspent cock before returning to cleaning him. He washed you thoroughly, taking care to wash your legs before making sure your stomach and belly button piercing were thoroughly cleaned. Finally, he reached up to wash the leftover makeup off of your face. He touched you like a porcelain doll, worried that you would crack under even the slightest pressure, making you giggle. He flinched, thinking he hurt you, but you grabbed his face in your hands, delivering him a kiss that covered his face in soap.

You both stood there, laughing for a second, relishing the moment before you let out a shy smile. "You can touch my chest now, but make sure you clean my piercings carefully." He looked down at your chest, and now that he'd been given permission, he didn't really know what to do. You could see the puzzled look on his face so you grabbed one of his soapy hands in yours and brought it to your breast. He squeezed experimentally, and you let out a gentle moan. You had been keeping in your arousal to draw out his teasing, but you couldn't hold yourself back as you felt his large hands grasp around your chest and roll your nipple in his fingers.

There was a sweet dichotomy in the harshness of his grasp on your boob, coupled with the gentle twist of your nipple. It was as if he was worried to hurt your piercings, so he made up for it in his grasp. You brought the washcloth down to his cock, hard against his stomach, and began to work him. He whined at the harsh material. "I need to clean you up, baby. You still have a cummy cock. If you beg hard enough when I'm done, I will touch you." You said into his ear as he rested his head on your shoulder.

He was overstimulated, and you could tell, so you decided you wouldn't take as long as you wanted to tease him. But you would still draw it out for your own pleasure. He was bucking and mewling into you as you roughly got him off. It shot you straight to your core, the heat from the shower mixed with his grasp on you, physically and visually, had you closer than you wanted, and deep down you just wanted him to touch you.

When you deemed him clean enough you let the rag drop to the floor. "Beg" you moaned out. "Please, please touch me, I want your hand on me, that's all I want." He whined, bucking into the air. You took pity on him, grasping him with your soap-covered hand. He hissed as your soft touch replaced the rough rag and you could tell he was close. "Touch me, Spencer." You said and his hand shot to your core. His tentative moves giving way to a natural confidence. As he slipped a hand between your folds he could feel you dripping with desire. "O-Oh my god," was all he could stammer out before sinking two of his fingers into your depths, thumb circling your clit. You knew his fingers were long, and you had even fantasized about this exact moment, but nothing could prepare you for his actual length. He had said he did research but that was proven by how quickly he found your g spot and clit. You doubled over in pleasure as his fingers thoroughly fucked you out.

"Spencer, I'm so close, baby. Be a good boy and make me cum." You said, slumping against his shoulder, rubbing yourself against his hand. "Mommy, I'm cumming." He said, looking into your eyes as his body shuttered. His words ricochetted around in your brain, sending you over the edge as you cum all down his hand. You bit into his shoulder to muffle your scream, just as he matched you, cumming down your hand.

You came down from your high as Spencer nearly collapsed onto you. You took extra care in making sure he was all clean before helping him out of the shower and into a towel. He leaned against you the whole time as you got him ready for bed. You forced him to brush his teeth before dragging him to bed.

He sat at the edge, eyes bleary with sleep, taking in the events of the day. You sat behind him, gently toweling off his hair before brushing it and putting lotion on his body. He leaned into your touch, appreciating being cared for, feeling as if everything had been a dream. "C-Can I sleep here? I mean Morgan locked me out and I don't have pants and-" You cut him off with a gentle kiss."Of course, sweetheart, do you want to cuddle? It's ok if you don't or if you want this to be a one-time thing, it's all up to you, baby." You said, gently sweeping his hair out of his face as he looked up with eyes the size of dinner plates. "We can do this more than once? You'll let me? For real?" He asked. "Only if you want to sweetheart. This is all about you." You said, giving him a small smile tinged with a slight sadness. "That's not very fair, I want it to be about you too. What do you want?"

The question knocked you off guard. You're not used to people asking what you want. Usually, people just take and give none in return. The fact that Spencer Reid, your adorable virgin coworker was asking you what you wanted with such a sincere look, caused tears to prick into your eyes. "No one has asked me that in a long time," you smiled, "I would love to do this, and more again with you Spencer. Whenever you want." He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you down so you were lying next to each other on the bed. "Whenever we want" He corrected, cuddling into you.

You surveyed the bite make you left on his shoulder, running your hand over it. "Sorry for marking you up, I didn't mean to hurt you." You said softly as he blushed. "I-I was actually wondering... well... could you maybe give me a hickey? I like that you marked me." He said. You obliged him, giving him long kisses and sucks, gradually working up your force until a large purple bruise had formed on his collar bone. He was gently moaning the whole time, but you didn't want to work him up again as he had already cum twice that night and you didn't think he could handle more. He looked down at it as you pulled away, and you could see a question lingering on his mind.

"What's up?" you asked, smoothing his hair with your hand. "You said you hadn't been asked what you want in a long time, and I was wondering, well... who gave you your piercings?" he asked tentatively and you laughed." You have been reading my book too much, how many chapters have you read?" You said and he looked up at you surprised."You knew? and... well... only 3 chapters. I didn't want to pry into your private life." He said. "You just pried enough to know I want to get pierced by someone?" You asked raising an eyebrow. Before he could get an excuse out, you cut him off. "Well for a genius, you obviously didn't read it that carefully. I said I WOULD like to be pierced during sex, meaning I have not before. These are just standard piercings from a piercing shop, not a big deal, I just like the way they look." You said and he let out a sigh of relief. "Why? d'you get jealous?" you questioned him. He looked down and nodded shyly.

"I can be a lot of firsts for you but if you play your cards right, you can be a lot of firsts for me too. You already gave me a first tonight. You called me mommy. No one's done that before but it was really hot. I liked it a lot." You said matter of factly. "But that is a conversation for another day. It is 2 am and we need to be on a flight at 7:30, so let's get some sleep." You said, turning off the lights and cuddling up close to him. In a matter of seconds, you both were asleep, tangled into each other's arms, both of you feeling, for once, safe and sound.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 1 Here / Chapter 2 Here / Chapter 3 Here

Well wasn't that a doozy. I had so much fun writing that and I think it paid off for sure. Shoot me a message if you want to be added to my beloved tag list, speaking of which.

@spencer-reids-slut @ya-triedit @reidstoychest @flipperpenguins @thatsonezesty13 @jbbarnes-loki @big-galaxy-chaos

#spencer reid smut #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid blurb #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds #sub spencer #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid #sub!spencer #pervspence #pervespencer #perve spencer reid #perv spencer reid

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joonsdragoneyes · 3 years

Text

We’re live [Gamer!Jungkook x Reader][M]

Pairing: Jungkook x female!reader

Warnings: Smut, profanity, semi-public sex, protected sex (reader is on birth control), mentions of reader needing reading glasses, oral m receiving, drooling, handjobs, orgasms male and female, f and m orgasm denial/edging, big dicks, body worship (kinda), tattoos/piercing's, mentions of sex in other locations, minor hair pulling, mentions of disapproving families/hiding things from parents, mentions/descriptions of reader having a large chest, reader is kind of bratty, usage of the word cock, voice kink if you squint

Genre: Smut, some angst, streamer/youtuber au, college au if you turn on a blacklight

Word count: 4.7k

Summary: You and Jungkook have been living together for a little over a year now, a big decision after your previous several years of dating. He, of course, brought his job with him- a full gaming set up, which you happily let him set up in a spare room. Your boyfriend was a pro-gamer. This job usually kept him busy, his focus on his screen rather than you for a majority of the day. You normally didn’t mind this at all, since you were usually out during that time anyway. Today, however, was different. You were home, attempting to study as he worked in order to give him the space he needed. Except, you were missing him in a way you hadn’t in a while, and the only way to get rid of this frustration would be to get him away from his work.

{A/N: This work is completely unedited, so apologies for any typos.}

----

You could hear him yelling through the door.

The laptop sitting in front of you was beginning to dim from lack of use, the loud shouts from the room a bit down the hall further ruining your already destroyed concentration. Your glasses slid down your face as you lifted, the feeling causing you to pull them off. Flopping tiredly against the back of the chair, you took one final look at the multiple windows you had open on the screen as the screen finally went black, leaving you with nothing but your reflection on the screen. Your hair was messily tied back, strands and chunks falling around everywhere from where they escaped from your hair tie. You looked away from the sight of your own face, burying your face in your hands as your elbows came to rest on the shiny, hardwood table; you slamming the device shut as your hand lowered, your fingers pulling the skin down along with it. You sighed in frustration, letting your head flop back against the chair as you slid down, your butt now hanging off of the seat.

His voice practically bounced off the walls, each full-concentration shout of sudden frustration ringing through the house. Each time caught your attention, snatching you quickly from your exhausted daze. He seemed to be having fun in-between moments of what you assumed was either interacting with the chat or moments where it sounded like he lost- or rather, almost lost. You could already hear him coming out in a few hours, bragging about he remained undefeated in a game you couldn't remember the name of, a large, bright grin present on his face, his own pulled back hair messily sprawled in every possible direction.

You sometimes watched his streams and videos while you worked, at least you used to. It always ruined your concentration when you did, as it was now, but they were admittedly entertaining. He never knew you did, you showed little interest in his job, and you'd rather keep it that way.

Sitting up, you lifted your hands to adjust the straps dangling uncomfortably down your shoulders, adjusting the rest of your top in the process, pulling it up from where it slid down, at this point revealing almost everything. It appeared to have shrunk given how tight it was and how easily it slid down, but it wasn't like it would be anything your boyfriend hadn't seen before in the instance you failed to notice and flashed him. The tank top you had on usually did well with covering everything, but knowing that lately, for some reason, it wasn't, made you frown. It was comfortable and nice to wear around the house; you just felt irritated adjusting it constantly.

You stood up, moving toward the various loud sounds coming from the room. The door clicked as you turned the knob, pushing the large wooden object open, the many lights strung on the walls greeting you as you stepped inside the large room. The whiteboard he had hanging on the wall was full of writing and multiple expressive doodles- a few piles on the floor from a few other random activities. It was dark aside from the many lights hanging from the walls and ceiling, your boyfriend well illuminated by the glow from the multiple monitors sprawled in front of him.

Turning to face him fully, you closed the door behind you, leaning against it for a moment as you paused. He hadn't noticed you yet. You felt odd about walking in like this. You had never interrupted him while he was working unless he needed something, in which case he usually just came to get you. You honestly didn't even know if any of his fanbase knew he was in a relationship at all-; you both usually just kept to yourselves. Aside from him eventually coming upstairs to meet you in bed to sleep, coming out to eat, or the occasional 'date'- which was just running errands together or him coming with you to watch a movie you were pretty much already leaving for- you both didn't really spend a lot of time together. At least you hadn't recently.

The sight of his wide eyes and pouty expression made your heart melt, and you couldn't help but smile. He was sitting in his much-bigger-than-him gaming chair, his legs crossed with his knees near his chest as he leaned forward, his expression serious despite the generally cute nature of everything else about him. His way too big shirt swallowed him easily, and it was only at this moment that you realized he had borrowed one of your hair-ties. The pale purple band was more than familiar, and there it was, tightly holding his long black hair neatly in place.

"Jungkook-" You started as you moved close, his head instantly lifting in order to meet you, his serious expression quickly growing soft. He seemed a little confused seeing you in here but still happy about it nonetheless.

You suddenly panicked slightly, watching the screen nervously in the hope you didn't appear in the camera too much, mostly attempting to keep your face out of frame. Gently, you leaned against the back of the chair, his teeth quickly appearing in a wide, excited grin. "Do you need anything?" He asked, his bright, wide eyes meeting yours. You could feel the excitement radiating from him, his lips and cheeks pink in the light from the lamp as he spoke. "Just missed you." You admitted, crossing your arms against the back of the chair as you leaned slightly forward.

The chat on one of the monitors suddenly sped up, you noticing it from the corner of your eyes. A loud mix of emotes and words in all caps filled the screen, zooming by before you could read any of them. You watched Jungkook slide his headphones off, letting them rest on his neck as his legs uncrossed, his socked feet flopping against the carpet. "Here, you can sit with me and watch." He chirped, quickly pausing whatever game he was playing and scooting over to make as much room as he could. You shook your head.

"No, I..." You trailed off, pouting a bit as you lift your arms, moving your hands around your face in a way you hoped emphasized your unwillingness to be on camera. You knew they could see your body just fine, but you were on your computer all day and hadn't slept well, so showing your face was definitely out of the equation. Jungkook simply let his head fall slightly to the side in confusion, letting out a small "But you look fine.".

You pouted, watching as he quickly stood up, the chair rocking slightly as he slid out of it. "Here, I know just the thing." He quickly shuffled near the back of the room and over to the closet doors, pulling them open. You watched quietly as he began to shuffle through a box, the already present pout on your face growing stronger. You recognized that box. That box was from your senior prom. You already knew what he was looking for.

He quickly pulled out a black mask, the very one you had worn years ago. Why he had kept it this long, you didn't know, but you still found yourself sighing as you realized it would still work. You didn't really want to remember that masquerade themed prom, especially considering neither you nor Jungkook had fun during a majority of it. It had its moments, but you had hoped you wouldn't have to go near that specific costume again.

"Sorry, it's all I've got." He whispered, gently placing it in your not-very-eagerly awaiting hands. Taking a deep breath, you slid the mask onto your face as Jungkook scoot past, flopping once again into the large chair, his voice loudly sounding as he began to interact with the apparently very excited chat.

Once again adjusting your top, you moved over to where your boyfriend was sitting, plopping down next to him as one of his muscular arms wrapped around your waist as you settled against him, your thighs touching. You shuffled, wrapping your arm around his waist as well, your legs bouncing from where they hung off the seat as Jungkook pulled the chair forward. You felt the tension in your crossed legs relax as you realized you'd only be seen from slightly above your waist.

His hand slid around you, grabbing onto the controller resting on his thighs. Your arms flopped to the side, resting against your boyfriend's thighs in an attempt to keep them out of the way. Your fingers gripped tightly onto his sweatpants, your head coming to rest gently on his shoulder. Jungkook grinned, his teeth shining through his lips the more comfortable you became.

You could feel his voice vibrating against you as he spoke, the sound making you feel warm inside, a soft tingle running from your head to your thighs. "What're you playing?" You questioned, leaning against his strong shoulder, enjoying his warmth. His face slowly contorted slightly in thought, a pout forming on his lips as he noticeably racked his brain for the answer. "Astrotech." He finally responded, his expression moving quickly back to the way it was, his cheeks noticeably a bit pink.

Various loud booms and screeches flooded from the headphones around his neck, which he had turned up for you to hear. You didn't know what was going on it, but the sight of him expertly doing whatever objectives or maneuvering the obstacles in the game was somewhat fascinating to you.

He suddenly squirmed under you as you adjusted yourself, the sudden movement surprising until you realized your hand had just accidentally rubbed along his thigh in the process. Your lips pressed together in thought, realizing just how sensitive he seemed to be. Deciding to see if that was truly why, you cautiously ran your hand along his thighs, feeling him once again squirm under you. The barely audible groan of protest as you slightly ruined his concentration made something in your brain just click.

You knew why you were so distracted earlier.

Slowly, your hand moved along his leg before sliding inwards towards the warmth where they met. Before he could squirm again, you gave a soft squeeze to his strong thighs, enjoying the slightly surprised noise that escaped. He seemed annoyed that you were attempting to distract him, but his lack of any indication for you to stop or any sort of 'no' from him gave you the willingness to continue.

Your hands moved further up, sliding along the space between his legs and up towards his stomach. He had stopped moving aside from the slight tremble of his thighs as you made your way along. His legs slightly parted, allowing you to continue on your way, the outline of the package you were searching for soon starting to appear in his sweat pants. You licked your lips gently, tracing the outline with your fingers, enjoying the sighs you heard from his weak attempts to keep quiet.

"Alright, well, I guess I'll see you when you're done." You suddenly spoke. "I just came to visit because I missed you, but you seem pretty busy with work." You added, pulling your hand away as you stood, sliding out of the chair as you moved quickly towards the door. Thoughts ran through your brain as your hand grabbed the doorknob, opening it before gently shutting it immediately after. You turned to look at your boyfriend still sat behind you, biting your bottom lip in thought.

Slowly and quietly, you dropped down to your knees, crawling on the ground over to the desk as you swiftly slid under it. Leaning forward, you grabbed the tops of his pants, slowly pulling them down as you felt your eyes grow wide at the sight. You had seen it before, but it was still a pleasant surprise each time.

Your hands moved along his legs, swiftly grabbing the still mostly soft length, pumping them quickly as Jungkook once again squirmed under you, his legs spreading. You could feel him continuously growing under you as you moved, the sight and feeling causing your thighs to tingle.

Licking your lips, you moved forward, licking the tip of his eagerly awaiting cock, listening as he tried to stifle a pleased hum. Before he could fully react, you took the full length in your mouth before sliding down, bobbing your head with vigor, enjoying the soft noises that escaped as a result of your movements. Your hands continued to slide quickly, making up for what you couldn't reach.

Your boyfriend sighed above you, doing his very best to act as normal as he possibly could. The soft clicking and tapping from his controller continued, you only drooling as your head continued to lower, taking in as much of the steadily hardening length as you possibly could. Pawing at him for the bit you had the chance to seemed to work, not quite in the way you had hoped, but you were fixing that just fine. A soft slurp sounded as you suddenly lifted your head, the noise causing you to pause as you hoped no one had heard the sinful action going on under the desk. The conversation between him and the on-going chat seemed to be normal despite his occasional deep sighs. His fingers ran through your hair, giving a slight tug as you continued, closing your eyes as you attempted to savor the moment- still being careful to make as little noise as possible.

A sharp tug to your thick hair pulled you upwards, your breasts practically in his lap as your arms lifted, grabbing onto his thick black hoodie in an attempt to keep yourself steady. You hummed a bit in surprise, the action causing his strong hands to increase their grip on you as your head only continued to bob. He was gasping now. Loud pings and sound effects rang from the screen from what you assumed was possibly the hundredth donation of the night. You increased your speed, enjoying the strong but more gentle tug that followed with each movement of your salivating mouth.

You were only wondering how he was managing to hide this so well.

Your gaze slowly moved upwards, checking his expression. His face was flushed, his teeth on display as he bit his lower lip in a last attempt to keep quiet. His expression was otherwise unchanged aside from his noticeably dilated pupils, his face still stern with concentration.

With a loud pop, you finally pulled away, quickly using your knuckles to wipe away the strand of saliva that followed. Swiftly pulling his pants back up, you shuffled from under the desk and over to the door. That would be enough for now. After all, you didn't actually want to get caught.

You could feel him watching you as you stood up and quietly opened the door. How upset he was that you didn't finish could be felt from where you stood, but you knew he'd get you back later. He always did. It didn't matter if you just ate his food or if you pulled a small prank, he always got you back, and this time you could say you looked forward to it.

---

The door flew open with a loud bang, you jumping with surprise at the sound, nearly dropping your phone in the process. Your head lifted to meet the sight of your boyfriend standing in the doorway, his hair messy as he loomed over you. "What was that about?" He questioned, his eyes darting to take in your form.

"What was what about?"

"You know what."

You felt your cheeks warm but decided to continue pretending you didn't have a clue what he meant. "No, Jungkook, I don't know what."

His lips pressed together, his eyes narrowing. He stepped forward, closing the door behind him, a soft click sounding as he slowly locked it. You watched quietly, biting your lip as you knew what would happen next. He wasn't usually this quiet.

"Thankfully, I was able to continue normally without much issue." He plopped on the bed next to you, the weight of his larger form causing the mattress to sink under him. The force was almost enough to cause you to slide along with it.

"But you must think I'm a fool if you think you'll get away with sneaking under the desk like that."

By then, he had leaned close, his voice low as he spoke. His tattoos could be seen poking from under the dropped neck of his shirt, your eyes slipping down the closer he leaned. You flopped forward, your gaze meeting his as your hands came to rest on top of his own. "And what are you gonna do about it?" You teased. This wouldn't at all be your first time with each other, and it certainly wouldn't be the last.

"You're not even ready. I could hear you taking care of it yourself before you came up; you're not as quiet as you think."

His hand lifted quietly, curling under your chin as he held your head still. "Alright, smartie, what're you gonna do about that?"

"You're usually the horndog in this situation. What am I gonna do about it?"

You were suddenly shoved against the bed below, the thick blanket warm under your body. He placed a soft kiss on your lips, his hair draping around his face as he leaned over you. "You'll have to wait to find out, huh?"

"Damn, you must really be upset." You teased without even a second of hesitation. "Man, I really wonder what you'll do. Oh, how long must I wait? Forever? Years; Centuries of waiting just to punished in the end! Just end me, as waiting is its own punishment." You whined dramatically under him, your arms lifting as your hand sprawled against your forehead, your eyes closing as your head flopped back in exasperation against the mattress below.

Jungkook laughed. "No, you won't have to wait very long. You know I wouldn't do that to you." He grinned, his teeth bright and shiny behind his lips. "Remember when we were younger, and I still lived with my parents, and you came over to study?" He asked, his noticeably strong hands trailing over your body, their attention quickly focused on your chest. You opened your mouth to speak, only to get interrupted as he continued.

"We waited until they left to run some errands, and we decided to try and be super quick." He paused to laugh to himself, you barely listening as you bit your lip, your nipples beginning to poke through the fabric his hands continued to glide over. "We started getting way too loud near the end and almost got caught because we didn't hear them pull in. The only reason we were able to clean up and everything was because you happened to finish before they walked in and could hear what we were doing. Man, what an adrenaline rush that one minute was as we scrambled around listening to them slowly come up the stairs."

By then, you were moaning under him, the fabric rough against your extremely sensitive chest. His strong fingers continued running along, teasing the hardened nubs as he moved on with another story, seemingly unaware of what he was doing. His hands snuck under your shirt, his hands warm as he grabbed as much of your breasts in his large hands as he could. "Sorry, I was talking." He apologized, taking the moment before you responded to swiftly yank your shirt over your head.

In your moment of distraction, you had become so hot and bothered that you hadn’t even noticed how long he had been rambling. You could hardly hear his reminiscing over your increasingly more desperate moans. The feeling of the cold air hitting your already erect nipples made you squirm slightly, you only coming back to reality to a soft warmth on your neck. Your hands lifted, gripping with white knuckles tightly onto his thick hoodie.

You lowered your gaze, the sight of his face resting on your chest greeting you. His hair messily covered his eyes, the deep brown underneath shining in the light of your bedroom. His lips were pressed softly together into a pout, his tattooed arms lifted to lay across your shoulders, wrapping under your head. “You’re not paying attention!” He whined, continuing to pout as he shuffled to lean over you, the mattress squeaking ever so slightly as his knees rested on the bed.

He paused to pull the thick fabric free from his body, letting it thump to the ground as he leaned over you once again, the thick ink on his arms dancing as his muscles flexed in the process. Your eyes widened as his face approached yours, your noses quickly touching, the pout still present. “You didn’t hear my story.” He whined again, softer this time, the shine still present in his wide eyes despite the shadow he was casting over you. “You weren’t even listening.”

“Honey, you were rambling.” You responded, hoping he couldn’t feel your racing heart. He flopped down, his hips straddling your own as he sat up, his strong arms causing the bed to sink in as he continued to lean over you, your thighs tingling at the slight bounce that followed as he grew comfortable on your hips.

“I was telling a story.”

He lowered himself, his lips coming into contact with your own, your hands lifting to grab on the thin white t-shirt that remained. His teeth ran softly over your lips as he pulled away, his hands once again moving to slide under your head. Your thighs burned and tingled with each movement he made.

You were beginning to sweat as you continued gripping him tightly, your hips wiggling to wrap your legs around him. His lips once again moved into a pout, the shine is his eyes disappearing as his head came to rest on your chest once again. He definitely felt you move.

His legs slid around you, his knees moving under your hips to lift them up, pressing his now noticeably tight sweatpants against your shorts. He once again lowered to kiss you, more gentle this time as his hands lowered to remove his sweat pants, leaving nothing between you but your shorts- which already barely covered anything. Your own hands lowered, grabbing onto the hard length poking between your legs, pumping slowly as he sighed into the kiss. Your shoulders ached as his hands pressed against your shoulders, pressing you into the mattress. You sped up your wrist movements, listening as he groaned into the continued kiss.

Suddenly, his hands shot down, levering your legs open and lifting his hips to practically rip your shorts free of your body as he finally broke the kiss. His legs slipped off the bed and onto the floor with a loud thud, swiftly yanking you close to the edge. His fully flexed arms caged you in, his lips coming into contact with your exposed neck, his breathing soft and warm against your skin.

“Roll over.” He huffed, moving to kiss along your chest and shoulders. His face was now a soft pink, lifting to watch you intently as you rolled onto your stomach, letting out a noise of surprise as you were yanked yet further off of the bed, your feet now touching the floor. Kisses once again returned to your neck, an occasional moment of cold causing you to shiver with delight as his tongue traced over your warm skin with each mark he left behind. Your still erect nipples dragged softly over the sheets under you, the cool mixture of the sheets and his tongue piercing causing you to moan loudly under him.

Your face slammed softly against the mattress below, his strong arms pressing against your shoulders to hold you in place, your hips lifting in the process. Of all the times you’ve done this, he wasn’t usually this rough, but you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t exciting.

“Fu-” You moaned, burying your face in the mattress at the stretch that followed. “-ck.” Your hands gripped onto the sheets, the feeling of his teeth and tongue reaching every inch of your neck making you whimper. He had always been taller, but it wasn’t until now that you realized just how much stronger- and bigger than you he was. You could hardly move with the grip he had on your shoulders, your head the only thing able to move freely. He had you where he wanted you, and it’d probably be a while before he’d free you.

Each thrust ruined your hopes of being quiet, drool beginning to fall from your lips as he continued- each thrust more intense than the last. Your eyes were soon rolled back, your mouth open as saliva dripped from your parted lips, the sharp tugs to your hair adding to the overall ache. Your legs, hips and shoulders were growing more pained with each lewd slam into you, each second bringing you closer to the edge. You were silent, the ache taking your breath away, a loud gasp escaping as he freed your shoulders, yanking you upright by your hair.

His arms wrapped under your chest, freeing you from the bed entirely as he held you in place, your arms contorting behind you to hold onto his now moist t-shirt. You were trembling, your chest burning as you gasped for air. “Jungkook...” You managed, your voice hoarse as your head flopped backwards against his muscular shoulders. You could feel the mess you were already making in your excitement, awaiting the finish you were mere seconds away from, only to groan as you felt him stop, your chest bouncing as he adjusted you.

“No...” You whined in complaint, taking the time to catch your breath only to catch yourself moaning with each exhale. You continued shaking as he kissed along the back of your shoulders. “Don’t stop...” You continued, wiggling your legs slightly to get him to continue. He groaned with your wiggles, grabbing your thighs to keep you in place. “Stop moving.” His voice was soft and gentle, your head rolling around on his shoulder as he placed another kiss on your aching neck.

“You’re so pretty.” He complimented, letting you fall forward with your hands hitting the mattress, his arms firmly gripping your thighs to stop your hips from moving from their position. The little eyeliner you had on had started to run, your hands gripping the sheets in anticipation as you wondered what about you with messy makeup was pretty.

You cried out, your voice still hoarse as the edge approached faster than before. After a minute you were trembling under him again, the ache returning as you tipped closer and closer to the edge. You were reduced to a shaking, squealing, moaning mess in a little over a minute, your legs struggling to hold onto him as they shook.

Your face once again slammed into the mattress, a loud groan felt against your back as his hips sputtered slightly, his large hands grabbing onto your hair once again as he attempted to keep himself steady as he finally tipped over the edge. His breaths were rough and quick against your back, you too busy attempting to catch your own breath to notice his hands had lowered.

You gasped, pleasure coursing through you once again as his fingers moved with renewed vigor. “Ju-Jungkoo-” You pleaded, struggling to even get his name out as his strong hands made quick work of your clit, you finally reaching your release with a sudden, violent shake. He pulled away, the emptiness that followed allowing you to fully fall against the bed, your legs weak as you attempted to stand. His arms wrapped around you, gently laying you down.

“Too much?” He questioned, taking in your exhausted form, his voice dripping with concern. His eyes widened slightly at the black smeared along your cheeks, pouting as he gently wiped it off, not seeming to notice his still wet fingers. “Too much.” He lowered to place a gentle kiss on your forehead, running his fingers through your messy hair. “Definitely too much.”

---

[A/N: Sorry that this came out so much later than I promised. Hopefully it was worth the wait.]

#bts #bts jungkook #bts jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #gamer jungkook #jungkook au

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