#but i had already done this when i changed my mind

[aestrayla]

cherries or peaches? pt. 2 ft. obey me! datables

summary: do they prefer ass or boobs? ft. obey me! datables x f!reader

cw: HIGHLY suggestive, mdni, fluff??, pet names (sweetheart), fondling, groping, grinding/humping, semi-public but no sex, licking, stripping, MY HUMOUR..

word count: 1.4k

a/n: thank u so much for the love on the first part, im so happy to be able to write these hcs, they’re such a fun idea. i got a bit carried away and some of these turned into half-ish fics but i hope u enjoy this version just as much as the first ♡

diavolo loves ass. the end.

just kidding.

ever since arriving in the devildom, student council meetings had always been a bore to you. you were never able to understand the complex topics of the “worldly problems” discussed, which often led to you staring out into space.

but ever since you got close to diavolo, things had changed.

“keep it down, y/n,” diavolo whispered through clenched teeth, as he kept a beaming smile glued to his face.

you let out a peeved groan. how the hell were you supposed to keep quiet when he kept rocking you back and forth on his lap like this?

despite your squirming, his hands never left you as he pushed and kneaded at your ass under the table. his hard-on evident as it ground against your clit, eliciting hushed whimpers from your lips.

in many ways, doing this was beyond worse than just zoning out, one wrong move and the whole student council would probably never look you in the eye again.

to make matters worse, diavolo insisted that meetings can’t start unless you were up here, in his lap, at all times.

“dia, i can’t do this anymore,” you whimpered under your breath.

“it’s almost over soon, sweetheart. just a little longer ‘n then i’ll make you feel good, hm?”

it might not be obvious at first, but barbatos loves boobs.

hearing that he was the “greatest pastry chef in all three worlds” has always been something that intrigued you. it wasn’t until you tried them for yourself that you realised that this statement was far from being a lie.

it was only a few weeks ago that you asked him to teach you a few of his recipes, you had never seen so much delight in his eyes. “oh that would be great, y/n! i’ve always been looking forward to the day you’d ask me so.”

as you slam the door to the oven, a gust of the hot air blows against your face, “how long should these be in the oven for, barbs?”

“thirty minutes should be fine. do you mind adding some of that sugar over there into this bowl?” you set the oven timer to thirty minutes before scurrying over with a measured bowl of sugar, pouring it into the bowl of fresh cream.

“perfect, could you whisk up this cream for me while i go find the vanilla?”

“sure.” he hands you the whisk before poking his nose through the cupboards in search of vanilla.

as you were whisking, you let your mind wander. gosh, i can’t wait to try this when it’s done… but dang i lowkey wonder when he’s gonna let me in his pants already… a few wet splatters across your chest had snapped you back to focus, “oh shit— i spilt it on me!”

the clank of the whisk dropping to the countertop had barbatos rushing towards you.

“oh goodness me, you’ve made a mess!”

“i know… fuck i’m sorry. i’ll just get a tea towel and wipe—”

before you could finish your sentence, barbatos had stopped you. his body crowding up against yours as he leaned in. holding you by your waist, you could feel his kitten licks swipe against your chest, even reaching as far down to the cleavage of your boobs.

you started to feel hot and dazed as the sweet aroma drifted through the kitchen, while he started to suck harshly against your skin, fingers creeping up to caress you’re boobs. soft pants began to leave your mouth as his tongue worked across your chest, but before it could escalate any further, he had pulled away.

as he stepped back, wiping the corner of his lips, you were left completely flustered, “oh wow, the cream without the vanilla tastes really good, you might just have a talent for baking y/n!”

“uh-huh…” you muttered, staring at him dumb-found and wide-eyed.

simeon is secretly a big fan of boobs, so today was a big treat for him.

it was the weekend, he had scored a pair of free tickets to the amusement park, and of course decided to bring you along. it was a leisurely day however, the rides and attractions he decided to do were almost too tame for your excitement.

dragging him along, you spot an attraction that seemed to catch your eye. handing two tokens to the employee, you quickly rushed into the tank, simeon freezing, clearly stunned and confused about what was about to happen. “hey y/n, what’s going on?!”

taking a seat on the tiny platform you point to the target beside you, “can you hit a bullseye?” you winked.

the employee hands simeon a ball, “you’ve got three tries, buddy.” after a moment of hesitation, he throws the ball, hitting the center of the target with a loud smack.

you let out a small shriek before getting submerged into the tank of water. “oh my— Y/N!” simeon rushes towards the tank, quickly pulling you out from the water. you let out sharp breaths before giggling, “your aim is amazing!”

“is this your idea of fun?!” his hands reach up to hold both sides of your face, turning it from one side to the other. “you’re not hurt are you?”

you smile sweetly, flattered by his concern, “i’m fine simeon, it was fun, really.”

he sighs, “good, alright.” his eyes travel over your body checking for any scrapes before widening at the sight of your chest. the water had soaked your white shirt completely, revealing that you were wearing nothing underneath. your round nipples were perked up from the cold water while your shirt was clinging onto your wet skin.

gasping even louder than before, in a flimsy last-minute attempt to cover you up, he slaps his hands over each of your boobs and although it works in his favour, you couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

“don’t laugh y/n! we need to get you a new shirt, or at least a sweater!”

you pull him towards you by his collar, your lips mere inches away from touching, “so are you gonna help me take this one off first?” your purr.

his hands race to cover his reddened face, “w-wait that’s not what i—!” upon realising your boobs are on display again, he slams his hands back over them, “y/n!” he whines.

two hours in, and it was blatantly obvious to solomon that this tutoring session was going nowhere.

you weren’t understanding any terms or concepts of the topic at hand and with a week to go before your final, it seemed like solomon was more worried about this than you were. surely it isn’t because you’re too distracted sitting in his lap, right?

he clears his throat, “how about this…” you slowly lift your head up from the palm of your hands, clearly distressed about your upcoming failure. “for every question you get incorrect, you remove a piece of clothing.”

you raise your brows, intrigued, “and for every question i get right, you remove a piece of clothing?” you stare back at him.

“exactly, and for that answer…” he slowly shrugs off his blazer and places it behind his chair, “i’ll remove this.”

in hopes of this becoming a motivation for you, he began to quiz you with a mini questionnaire. “what are the three ingredients used to make the elixir of cerebral stimulation?”

you internally face palm because you knew jack shit about brewing potions, “uhhh… newt legs, unicorn hair, and frog mucus?”

solomon clears his throat ubruptly. “um, no. the correct answer is powdered unicorn hoof, bittergrass root, and caladrius blood.”

you look down in embarrassment before removing three pieces of clothing. only four minutes in and you’re left in nothing but your underwear and bra.

“last and final question, what covered the devildom when it was first created?”

“…darkness?”

“…unfortunately, that is incorrect. the correct answer is a forest.”

you groan. you haven’t gotten a single question correct and embarrassment was evident as your face was flushed. you turn to face solomon, “at this point, why don’t you choose what i take off?”

your pretty face staring up at him, teary and doe-eyed had him swooning. slowly standing up and pushing your back down onto the table, he stared deliriously at you. papers were scattered everywhere and textbooks were crumpled open. your legs were wrapped around his waist as his hands gently pulled the straps of your bra down your shoulders.

staring at your bare chest he murmurs, “i’m obsessed with these,” before diving straight in.

a/n: haven’t written in about 5 months so excuse how rusty my writing has gotten.. but nonetheless, thank for reading this far, luv you all ♡

©2024 aestrayla. do not modify, copy, translate or share.

[caffeinewitchcraft]

Cinderella Doesn't Believe in Fairytales (pt 10)

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3). (Part 4) (part 5) (part 6) (part 7) (part 8) (part 9)

Summary: There are many sorts of meetings. Meetings you dread and meetings you anticipate. Baron Ramsey is overdue for both.

“I did not expect you to return so soon,” the Queen says. Her coal-like eyes flick over the Baron, cataloguing every inch of him. Did she see the dust clinging to his trousers, evidence of his haste to arrive? Did she see the tightness in his jaw at her welcome? Did she see the new bead of sweat rolling down his cheek? “Another week at the earliest.”

“I—” The Baron has to summon moisture to his mouth to speak. He swallows. “I was already within our borders when your message found me. Of course, I had no choice but to return.”

The Queen’s expression doesn’t change, but her aura does. She leans back in her throne and watches him through half-lidded eyes. “Why is it you think I called for you, Baron David Ramsey?”

To torment me, he thinks and doesn’t say. He wishes he would have listened to his wife all those years ago. She told him they must go unnoticed. He thought he had rid himself of his arrogance when he married her, but he was wrong. It had been arrogant of him to not heed her warning.

“There is a new type of dye in the southern islands,” he says. He spreads his hands wide. “If I had known your majesty had already heard of it, I would not have delayed in finding a sample. I hope you will understand. I was returning home after so many years abroad.”

The Queen never admits to not knowing. Her expression flickers. “Yes, the new dye…I am interested in it.”

A wave of relief rocks through him. This is familiar territory. Every request for a new product she gives him is another handful of months he can keep her attention away from his home and the secrets he has kept hidden there for 19 years. “It would be my privilege to acquire some products using this new dye for you, your majesty. I have made a promise to the Baroness to return home this month however, so there will be a delay—”

“Returning home to an empty house?”

The Baron blinks. “Pardon?” Then her words register and a surge of sick fear makes him sway on the spot. What has she done? He swallows twice before he can speak. “N-no, to my daughter – my daughters. To the Baroness.”

The Queen studies him. The Baron desperately tries to hold himself still. The Queen always speaks vaguely. He is hearing a threat where none exists. The Queen’s domain may extend past his manor, but her magic doesn’t. She doesn’t know, she can’t know. She is testing him. Should he have denied knowing that the higher nobility of this land were, in fact, the Unseelie Court?

Sweat rolls down his temple and he feels the Queen’s eyes track its progress.

“Then rejoice,” the Queen says at last. Her nails trace the arm of her throne. “Your journey is at an end. Your family is in the Capital.”

“Wha—” What?! The Baron bites his tongue so hard blood wells. The pain does little to clear the panic from his mind. “I—I was not aware.”

“I can see that,” the Queen says. The sharp edge in her gaze softens. Calculation crosses her face briefly and settles into an unsettling amusement. She smiles. “Yes, that makes sense. You wouldn’t have been home to receive the invitation. There is a ball, Baron David Ramsey. All eligible ladies of the kingdom are in the Capital for it, of course. Your…daughters included.”

A ball? It’s been three decades since the Queen last a held a ball, perhaps longer. Why now? His wife told him that the Unseelie Court was confined to the very core of their territory after the last great war. She predicted that their power would not be enough to free them for another hundred years. So why a ball? Why invite the human nobles across the land to come into the heart of the territory before they were recovered? Why—

The Prince. These are politics the Baron knows. The Prince has come of age this year. This isn’t an ordinary ball. The Royal Line must continue regardless of the powers they may or may not have recovered. A Prince needs a Princess.

The Unseelie Court is hunting for new blood.

“Then I suppose,” the Baron says faintly, “that I am not going home quite yet after all.” The unease the Queen voicing his name evokes fades next to the sick fear roiling in the Baron’s stomach. “By your leave, of course.”

“Nothing would make me happier than having your attendance at the ball tonight,” the Queen purrs. She extends a hand and an invitation appears in the air between them. She crooks her finger and it drifts into the Baron’s chest. “I guarantee that this will be a  surprise reunion that no one will want to miss.”

The Baron’s clammy hand presses the invitation over his heart. Is it his imagination or can he feel oily tendrils seep from it and into his heart? Is the air colder? Without thinking, the Baron says, “Thank you for your consideration, your majesty.”

A wave of weakness washes over him as soon as his thanks leaves his lips. He staggers and his vision wavers. The Queen’s nostrils flare as she breathes in deeply, eyes fluttering shut. Does the King laugh behind his hand? Or does he cough?

His wife’s voice echoes in his mind. Never thank the fae. Never apologize. And especially never give thanks nor apology to the Unseelie.

“Don’t thank me yet, Baron,” the Queen says. When she opens her eyes they gleam with an unearthly purple. Black stains her mouth when she smiles. “Tonight. Thank me tonight.”

The order slips around his neck like a noose. The invitation throbs like a second heart. “Yes, my Queen,” the Baron whispers.

---------.

Cinderella watches the colors of the sunset catch in the crystals embroidered on her dress, red and pink and gold against the eggshell blue of the silk. Helga’s hands are gentle as she weaves Cinderella’s hair into an intricate knot.

“There,” Helga says. There’s a faint press of lips on top of Cinderella’s head, the move so effortlessly affectionate that Cinderella’s heart sings. Helga gently lifts Cinderella’s chin. “Take a look. We can change anything you don’t like.”

This afternoon with Helga has been magical. Cinderella doesn’t remember the last time she felt so at ease with another person besides the Prince. They talked and laughed and commiserated over her friend’s lack of communication, about nature, about what type of jam goes best on what type of bread, about everything and anything. Good food and good company has healed something deep inside of Cinderella, another crack sealing tight and holding. She can’t imagine not liking something that Helga has done for her.

She is still surprised when she sees herself in the mirror.

Last night’s gold jewelry highlighted Cinderella’s hair and the deep green of the dress. She remembers feeling beautiful and elegant and so, so confident.

Tonight is—well, it’s everything Cinderella feels.

It’s as if Helga listened to Cinderella’s recounting of the previous night and manifested every hope and every joyful memory  into what Cinderella sees before her. She feels like she’s glowing. Rather than focus on her hair this dress throws her light eyes into brilliant focus. She blinks quickly. She didn’t realize she had her mother’s eyes until this moment.

Her jewelry is still dainty, but it all shines as brightly as the crystals dotted like flowers through the skirts of her dress. A single teardrop pendant hangs from a silver chain around her neck and diamond earrings reflect firelight as the castle lights the sconces around her room. Silver thread holds Cinderella’s hairstyle in place.

“I’m the sky,” Cinderella says breathlessly.

“And more,” Helga promises. There’s a knock on the door. Helga meets Cinderella’s eyes through the mirror and she smiles. “Your carriage has arrived, my lady.”

Cinderella’s heart leaps as she rises. The Prince is here. Her friend. Suddenly she feels…not insecure, not quite. There is a fluttering in her stomach as Helga goes to the door, a breathless anticipation that makes her feel weightless. She finds herself following Helga to the door, stopping a few feet behind her when the older woman opens it.

Oh, Cinderella thinks as, unerringly, the Prince’s eyes meet hers. The Prince is draped in a deep, night-sky blue, the same crystals on Cinderella’s dress sewn in clusters on his jacket. His black hair is swept away from his face and a thin, silver wire twines around one ear like a vine.

“You’re early,” Helga chastises the Prince.

The Prince jolts as if he didn’t notice Helga at all. “I thought it best if we had dinner before—”

“We match,” Cinderella says.

Helga jumps, spinning on one foot with her hand presses over her heart. “Oh! I didn’t hear you come up behind me...”

“Why,” the Prince says and pretends shock as he looks down at his outfit. “I think we do.”

Cinderella fights against a smile. “You knew I would choose the blue dress.”

“I had an inkling.”

Cinderella slides around Helga, barely noticing as the older woman wordlessly gives way. She takes the Prince’s arm when he offers it. “You said dinner?”

“That I did.”

Cinderella is full on bread and jam and juice. “I’d like that.”

“You could have sent a note,” Helga mutters. But she drapes a buttery-soft shawl around Cinderella’s shoulders to protect her against the evening chill and does not protest when the Prince leads her from Emerald Castle and into the gardens rather than to the carriage.

The gardens are a different world at night, especially seen from the ground rather than the window of her guest room. Small, wrought iron torches mark their path past the flower beds and towards the hedge maze.

“If you get us lost and we wind up being late again, I’m not walking in with you,” Cinderella says as they enter. The hedges smell slightly floral and she breathes the fresh scent in hungrily. Jasmine, maybe? “I saw the look the Queen gave you last night.”

“My mother doesn’t give looks to me,” the Prince denies. He grins at her. “And we won’t be late. Or, if we are, neither of my parents will be upset.”

Something in his voice gives Cinderella pause. “Because they love you so very much?”

“Because if we’re late, they’ll be late too,” the Prince says and directs her around one last corner into the center of the maze where the Queen and King are waiting at a table set for four.

-----------

(Patreon)

[keis-slut]

promise|k.tsukishima

CW: FINGERING, SLIGHT DEGRADING

Reader POV

‘let me be your boyfriend!’ he said, his immature voice echoing in my head.

“we’re still kids, tsukki, we can’t date!”

i respond back, my little kid brain not correctly processing how to even date.

that was an adult thing, right?

“then, i promise, when we’re older…-“

i remember the look in his eyes so perfectly, the innocent but promising stare he held on my younger form.

“-i’ll be your boyfriend”

still, even now, my stomach turns when i’m around him.

he’s probably forgotten what he said to me that night,

but i never did.

i never could, not when i started to look at him differently.

i couldnt bring myself to remind him of it either, what if he was dismissive? or he laughed, and said it was just a game, an irrelevant thing he had just said as a kid? what if he rejected me?

what if the promise meant nothing?

what if he forgot?

maybe i was so afraid of it meaning nothing, because deep down i already knew it did.

it hurt even more, because i’ve thought about distancing myself to possibly control the feelings a bit better, but i could never bring myself to be away from him.

especially when he was so cold to others, yet his demeanor was so much softer around me.

but still, he’s changed into a very different person compared to when we were younger.

he use to be so bubbly, energetic and optimistic, and now,

distant and quiet, careful. too careful.

i haven’t changed, i’m still the same, he would tell me.

to this day, still don’t really know if he meant that in a good or bad way, but maybe that was just anxiety.

my eyes faltered from his wall, to focus on him waving at me from his desk, white headphones sloppily sitting around his neck.

i blink and reach up to remove my headphones.

“hm?” i raise a brow

“been trying to get your attention for like, eight years”

you and me both, my head echoes.

i laugh and pause my music, shifting on his bed.

“sorry, lost in thought”

i respond nonchalantly, and i watch him remove his headphones from around his neck, placing them on his desk.

he sighs and turns off his desk lamp, then see him stand from his chair.

“are you done for tonight? do you want me to leave?”

he drags his feet over to the bed next to me, and sits down, removing his glasses and rubbing his face tiredly.

i move my body to face him, legs crossed as my knee high socks started to roll down messily.

my whole being felt a mess right now, my overthinking mind, my hair was crazed from how i wore my headphones, i was wearing one of his sweaters, very baggy on me because of how tall he was compared to my height.

“no”

he said, once he was done fixing his glasses, running hands through his messy and overgrown blonde hair.

i felt my chest thump a little harder, my breath hitching suddenly.

“you need rest, i can’t just linger”

he sighs and looks up at me.

“yea you can, you do it anyway”

he throws me a mischievous smirk, and my eyes widen.

“shut up, you’re the one that asked me to come over to keep you company while you studied!”

he raised a hand and poked at my forehead, hard enough to send me back on his bed slightly, having me catch myself with my arm.

“you shut up, you’ll wake my mother raising your voice like that”

i scoffed playfully and pushed myself back up, shoving his shoulder for pushing me first.

“whatever, dickhead. why do you need my company anyway?”

i ask, crossing my arms as i face him, his legs still dangling off his bed as he slouched.

his head turned to me as he cocked an eyebrow.

“why do you need mine? same reason”

i cocked an eyedbrow right back at him, laughing slightly.

“i doubt it’s the same reason as me”

he turns his body on the bed, now fully facing me.

“why? what’s your reason for wanting me around?”

my face warms up slightly, and i avert my gaze.

“i just do. we’ve always been together anyway, it’s just normal”

he laughs,

“right”

i face him angrily and place my hands on his bed, leaning in his face.

“what do you mean ‘right’?!”

“stop yelling, y/n, jeez…”

my face flushes embarrassingly, and i lean back again.

“does this have something to do with why you were having a staring contest with my wall?”

i think for a moment, wondering if i should bring it up.

i was worried, terrified even, that he wouldn’t remember.

or he would, and just laugh it off like a joke.

but doing nothing would also bother me.

at least if we talked about it, having some kind of answer was better than none.

“shortcake, oi-”

“-do you remember what you said that night, when we were kids?”

i cut him off, and he was taken aback slightly as he raised a brow.

“which time? we were kids, we always said stupid shit”

my heart already hurt just a bit as he said that, and i sigh, feeling defeated.

but i still continued.

“the promise, tsukki”

i build enough courage to look up at his golden eyes, staring at me as if he recalled.

or, already knew what i was talking about the whole time.

but he didn’t respond, so i sighed heavily, and went to get up from his bed, ready to gather my things and go.

but he grabbed my fingers to stop me from moving.

“and where are you going?”

i turned back to face him as my heart leaped from my chest, butterflies chaotic in my stomach when he touched me so suddenly.

“home”

i respond blankly, but i didn’t move, i didn’t pull my hand from his.

“do you remember what you said back to me?”

he asked, and i slightly turn my body back to face him, as i stood by his bed.

“what?”

he rolled his eyes playfully, teasing me for not keeping up.

“when i promised”

my body pulsed when he said it himself, hearing it in his voice, past his lips, the promise.

i carefully sat back down on the bed next to him, keeping his gaze on mine.

i knew my face was so flushed, it was embarrassing.

i didn’t remember what i said, i only remembered what he said to me,

and i wanted to know what came next.

he leaned forward, so out of character for him, but i didn’t oppose.

in fact, i leaned with him.

“maybe this’ll help-”

he started to say, as he turned his head and placed a kiss on my cheek.

“-you remember”

he places another one, a little bit harder as my hand found its way to the back of his head.

i felt him get carried away, as he kissed lower, down my jaw, under my chin.

my body pulled itself closer to his as he leaned into me, slender arm snaking around my waist to my lower back.

“you kissed-”

he gave me another kiss down my neck, peppering them all over as if he couldn’t get enough.

“-my cheek-”

he sighed heavily as he tried to catch his breath, feeling him hot against my neck, voice loud in my ear.

his other hand looped around my waist too, so he was now holding me, pulling me closer.

“-and said-”

it all came back to me as he kissed my cheek again, dangerously close to my lips.

i sighed, moaning slightly as he gripped onto my hips tighter.

“-i’ll wait for you”

we both said, almost in unison as his golden orbs caught mine.

our noses touched as we just stayed there, anticipating a kiss, my body tingling at his touch, the closeness,

this was happening.

i lean forward a bit, just barely grazing his lips as he wouldn’t allow me to kiss him first.

“i don’t know how much longer i can wait, tsukki”

i whine against his lips, and he smirks.

“don’t have to”

he moves forward, parting his lips as he hungrily catches mine.

i jump onto him, immediately opening my mouth to kiss back.

i straddled his lap as his hands did what they wanted, up and down my back, just barely respecting the boundary on my lower back to my ass.

i immediately lift myself, telling him it was okay, practically placing myself in his larger hands as he felt me.

my hands pulled at his hair a bit, my body pressed against his torso as i was much smaller than him.

the kiss was hot, so heavy and filled with tongue, a little biting here and there, or now, where he had my tongue trapped between his lips.

my mouth hung open as he sucked and kissed as much of me as he could, his hands holding onto the bottom of my thighs.

i whimpered and cried into his mouth, doing my best to ask for more.

and he responded, his fingers grazing so horrifyingly close to between my legs.

i broke our messy kiss for a second, shifting my body so i was now adjusting myself atop his hand.

“you’re right, i’m not waiting anymore”

i say, incredibly out of breath as i leaned my forehead on his.

one of his hands gripped my ass, pulling my cheek apart so it was easier to move my shorts to the side.

i lifted myself on my knees, and back down to have him feel the mess he created.

“thought you wanted to be my girlfriend, not a needy slut for my fingers”

i collapsed against him as i felt a finger slip in, immediately tightening.

he kissed against my neck again, nipping at my skin when i felt another finger.

he curls them, and i moan into his shoulder, rolling my hips, bringing my body up and down, anything i could to feel him,

i was desperate.

“that comes with me being your girlfriend”

i was doing all the work, until he leaned forward, slamming my back onto his bed.

the impact had his fingers pushed deeper, and my legs shook as i cried.

his body pushed one of my legs up, hanging over his shoulder as his fingers sunk into my cunt.

“oh, so you’re my girlfriend now?”

he teased, enjoying the look on my face as his fingers fucked me senseless.

through wild whimpers and moans, i chuckle.

“yes, i am”

he smirks, slowing his hand down and pulling out slightly.

he pauses, leaving my hips to twitch with need.

he pushes them back in, curling them deeply and flicking them just to force me to come undone.

“good”

[lustlovehart]

Hi there, i saw ur blade fics & omg 😳 So i came here to send a req for another blade content with gn reader. No yandere blade, but kinda dark (related to ur latest fic of him & i hope u r ok with my req, feel free to decline it).

So, ur latest fic said the reader leaves all of the 'sinning' to him. What if the reader wants to kill someone cz that person is somehow related to their past (in terrible terms with them & it haunts the reader like how it haunts blade). But the reader remembers to leave the 'sinning' to him, so they ask blade to do it (even though they apologize afterwards cz they feel like burdening him).

I hope my req is all safe, im sry if it's complicated 😭 But thx a lot!

Hell Is A Place Without You

A/n: Ahhh!!! I’m so happy you enjoy my Blade writings ^^, I actually already was planning on making a part 2 for it so this req was perfect | pt.2 of I’ll Suffer Your Sin

Summary: Your mind is dirtied with unwanted memories, who knew that nightmare would come back to haunt you? Only you decide who ends your dream. [Date with Blade goes horribly wrong]

Warnings: Violence, Blood, Being watched while you sleep, Awkward Bladie trying to court you, Minor Character Death, horrifically written fight scene

It’s impossible to truly escape your past, the traces and scars it left behind on you will always remain on your body, no matter how hard you scrub it off. Even in your own dreams, you aren’t free of such a hell. The way that they had betrayed you is etched so deep into your skin tearing your flesh to reach its core will never be enough to absolve you from the memory. The past you remember is buried in blood, their laughter ringing in your ears as you watched them destroy everything you had, yourself as well.

You dream of being free, alas, you'll be chained by it as long as they have you.

“Is something wrong?” The way your heart pumps as gasps of air rush in and out of your lungs doesn’t fail to go unnoticed by the man next to you. He’s bare, the only thing covering his torso being the bandages wrapped around his waist. The way the light from the moon gazing through the window highlights his prettiest features, his muscular stature, his face, and even the scars that adorn his skin are beautiful.

You're sure you would've liked the sight more had you been in a regular state of mind. The events from yesterday still continue to stir you up, and the nightmare only made it worse.

"I-It's nothing just a… Wait, have you slept at all Blade…?"

…

"No, I haven't"

"Why? I know you have sleeping problems but you should try."

" I was making sure you're okay." For a moment his eyes lock onto your wrapped hand, a cruel reminder of what he had done yesterday, 

…

"Were you… Watching me sleep…?" he blinks a few times at you before turning back towards the window. Maybe that cold chill up your spine was caused by him instead of your nightmare.

“If I said no you wouldn’t be convinced.” He’s right, even if he did you would most definitely tell he was lying. Well to be fair, he never lies to you, so it wouldn’t be hard to tell in the first place. Now that you think about it, there are some moments in which you wish he would’ve created a fake truth, alas, him and his “that will change nothing” mindset won’t fulfill that wish.

“You’re right, I probably wouldn’t.” You lift yourself from the bed, the sun still hasn’t risen, in fact, it’s still evening, but knowing you have a serial sleepwatcher in the room with you, it might just be better to stay up.

His eyes follow your groggy form slowly putting your work outfit on, his gaze not at all straying. It’s only when you look straight at him that he finally decides to not stare.

He breaks the silence while you’re trying to put on your shoes, his words making you pause and look back up at him for a moment, a null feeling hidden in your chest makes you consider telling him, but in the end, you choke it down and pay no mind to his words, going back to putting your footwear on.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“I said it was nothing—“ You don’t feel like announcing your personal problems as of the moment. When you finish, your body stands back up to its regular height, a small scream escaping your lungs when you turn around and find your coworker standing too close for comfort behind you. His stone-cold face is only inches apart from your own, each breath that escapes him being felt on your skin.

Despite how intimidating the situation is from an outsider's perspective, this proximity of closeness is usual between the two of you, so it doesn’t bother you as much as it should, but that doesn’t stop the chill in your body from happening.

“I don’t lie to you, I never would. Why don’t you hold the same sentiment?” His voice is soft, it’s a dead giveaway of his feelings for you, at least, you think it is, he’s not exactly the type to directly say “I love you”, so you have to gauge his current emotions through his body language and actions. It’s not a problem for you, that doesn’t mean it’s easy though.

“But I’m… I’m not lying.”

“Yes. You are. You’re not very good at it.” Sometimes you wish the two of you didn’t work as well as you do, if that was the case, maybe he wouldn’t be able to see through you so easily.

…

“You’re right I’m lying. But… I don’t know why you care so much… It has nothing to do with you.” Your sentence starts soft before branching out into a firmer tone. This change in attitude made his breath, though barely audibly, hitch in his throat. You don’t speak any more words, only letting his sight linger on you a little longer. His eyes close when he finally retracts himself from your body.

The breath you had held in your esophagus was finally sighed out from the sudden free space. When you look up again, you see the man walk towards the door, the handle clicking as he unlocks and turns it open.

Is he gonna leave…? No is he… Brooding…? The door swings open quickly, his body maneuvering so he’s on the side. He doesn’t look at you, but with the way he’s holding the door, you assume he’s holding it open for you.

“Let’s go.”

“Wha? It’s practically midnight… Where would we go? Nothing's open, and the script is meant to start in a couple of hours—“

“Do we need to have something to do?”

“Well, usually, yeah.”

“Then we’ll walk.” His eyes still don’t make contact with yours, but you can feel the very feint feeling of him wanting you to agree. As you walk forward your body can’t help but hesitate for a moment. The Stellaron hunter is quickly taken by surprise when he feels your previously injured hand grab onto his wrist and drag him along behind you.

———

The planet you both are currently residing within is a metropolis filled with millions of stores. Maybe if you hadn’t dreamed in your sleep you could’ve gone shopping, too bad they’re all closed.

“You could always go when we’re done with the script.” His deep voice breaks your train of thought as you look down at the tiny lights. You don’t look at him but a quiet “mm” is all he needs to hear to know you heard him.

“By the time we’re done, the city will be in shambles, I don’t think that’ll work.” It’s sad really, looking down at the little glowing wisps reminds you that there are people who live here, not just people, animals, and robots, all with their own lives.

“I didn’t say you had to buy anything.” Sometimes though, not all those lives are worthy of happiness.

“Are you implying we should steal during the aftermath?” You don’t hear the silent steps walking towards the two of you, too absorbed in your conversation with the one your coworkers describe as your “bodyguard”.

“I could do it for you.” They’re close, close enough to hear the words you speak to the man.

“Would you really? I thought you were the type to not stray from the script.” You finally turn around to face him, despite the solemn mood, a slight smile can be seen from your lips a teasing demeanor exuding from your mask. Your body leans on the railing, Blade's eyes occasionally shifting to where you stand, you take it he’s worried you’ll fall.

“I am. I’m following it. Elio says I’m to “make [Name] enjoy the planet”.”

“Oh? So you’re only doing it cause you have to?” Your body lifts from where you once leaned, his own staying unmoved as you advance toward him.

“No, I would’ve done it either way.” Your smile widens a little more, his words are simple but it’s nice to know he’d do something like that for you unprompted. 

The way your face exudes such a warm expression doesn’t go unnoticed, going from a formerly teasing to a more heartfelt look, making his mouth almost quirk up. Almost. As he stares, his mind is taking at least 5 mental pictures to not forget the look on your face.

Perhaps he’ll use it in the future whenever his mara needs quenching. Who’s he kidding, it’s not perhaps, it’s for certain that he’ll use it.

“Would you buy-- or rather, steal me a drink 'cause you want to?“ your finger lifts causing the man's attention to shift, looking at the vending machine in the far distance filled with different juices and beverages. He can feel you gently open his palm, placing credits in his hand. He doesn’t say words but nods his head, turning to walk towards the machine. 

A machine that was quite the stretch away from you.  

Your head turns to look at the pretty lights at the city below, unsuspecting of the person hidden behind you. 

A crunch sounds out through the air, your body immediately spinning to see the figure hurling towards you, the glint of steel highlighting the weapon in their hand. 

Clash of Blades continue to spiral out in the space until you’ve successfully pinned them to the railing, their body leaned over the fence, a small edge laid on their throat. Right there, in your hands, is the chance to leave your history behind in the dust. But, your hand can’t help but tremble. Your knees are weak too, despite it, your hand continues to press deeper, blood drawing from the wound. 

“Take me, as much as you need. All of it if you have to.“

“is that it?“ a sadistic laugh escaped from the depths of their throat. The cold feeling of a sharp point is directed in your stomach. “I’m fine with you coming back if that’s what you want-“ 

“... I don’t need it. So have it.“

The figure is shoved to the side, their head making contact with the floor, the weapon in your hand unmoving from its place as you look down to where their body lies. They’re still alive, the harsh breathing of their crumpled form on the floor is enough to tell you. A hand intertwines with your own, the familiar touch reminding you of the events from yesterday. 

Blade's hand is warm as he holds your fingers in his, the reds in his eyes looking down at you. 

“...“ 

For a moment, your eyes make contact, keeping a steady connection. The light from the city accentuates his looks, the expression on his face pensive, yet still pretty at the same time. 

“I’ll leave the… ‘sinning’, to you then.“

Slowly, your grip on the handle loosens, the only thing keeping your hold on the weapon being Blade's hands clinging to yours. 

“Blade… Please–“ Your head is turned down, the gentle tilt of his hand making you look at the floor. The knife is finally released from your possession, your eyes not looking up to meet him at the trade. From the edge of your vision, you can see Blade shrug off his outerwear, hanging the piece of clothing on your head, further sheltering you from the gruesome sight soon to come. 

The smell of Citrus and Herbal tea invades your nostrils, both comforting and horrifying. But, the scent is enough to distract you from the harsh sound of a knife swinging and the wheezing that accompanies it. A few quick jabs and the sound of breathing slowly dissipates. 

Even then, Blade's attack on the body does not stop, he keeps going until he can discern the sound of heavy breathing being yours and not his own, finally breaking him out of his trance and allowing him to turn back to you. 

Your hands slowly begin to lift the jacket from your person before swift footsteps halt your actions, quickly tugging the fabric back down. 

“Not yet.” 

He’s quick to take you by the waist, the pungency of iron breaching the protective layer of cloth between you and him. It isn’t until minutes pass does he delicately lifts the jacket off your head and rests it on your shoulders. 

The sight, it’s one you’ve seen dozens of times on him, deep scarlet liquid splattered and smeared on his body, hollow eyes, sullied clothes with fresh blood on his soft hair. 

You continue clinging onto his jacket. Looking at him, but not at him. The barrier serving as a blockade for the beast in front of you. 

Neither of you speak, only listening to the sounds of the sleeping city as you indulge in one another. His mouth leans towards his bloodied glove, the teeth behind his lips revealing themself and serving as a removal for the piece of fabric. 

He reaches for your hand, the scars on his skin evident as you allow him to place your palm on your chest. 

“You’re alive [Name].” He’s right, the beating in your chest is proof of that fact. But so what? “You’re alive in the same way that I’m dead.” What? The look he holds in his eyes is empty, not giving you any telltale sign of what he means. 

“But even then, what would the living know about the words of the dead.” A quote from Kafka that she had restated is all you can remember in your mind. His grip on your hand doesn’t relent for a moment, only pointing his head in the direction of the city, signaling you to turn around and see. 

The once-slumbering city has now awoken. A beautiful sight that will eventually fall despite the morning's hope. 

A ding sounds from Blade's phone. 

Kafka 🕸️: Are you ready dears? 

---

This took way longer to finish than I wanted it to

[leveloneandup]

(Photo: Katelyn Mulcahy/Getty Images for Angel City FC)

Christen Press set to return to Angel City training

Christen Press is returning to Angel City FC training this week, the team announced on Monday. Press, who tore her ACL in June 2022, has had a lengthy rehabilitation process that included four surgeries. While she has been training individually for the past few months, her full return to the team’s training environment is set for Tuesday.

“My first day, I’ll do the warm up and the passing pattern with the team, but it will still be the first time I’ve done a legitimate passing pattern with a bunch of bodies on the field and checking angles, because it’s just been one-on-one training for two years,” Press told The Athletic on Monday. “We really are looking at — I got my first ACL surgery June 22 (2022), a week before that I tore my ACL — so really coming up on a two-year mark since the last time I played soccer, the last time I’ve been in team training. When I first told Angel City (about my return), I was thinking, let’s just keep it closed, let me come in on a day when no one’s going to be there and let’s just see how it is. Then I reversed, I changed my mind, because I was like, ‘Shoot, who knows how many milestones I have left to celebrate? Who knows what’s going to happen after this first team training?’ So if this is something we can all celebrate, let’s just go for it, because this journey has been really, really long.”

In January, Press spoke to The Athletic while still officially designated as having a season-ending injury. At that point, she did not have a firm timeline for her return, though she expected it to be at some point during the 2024 season.

“The first thing I need to do is get into training, but then I can get into games, then I can score goals, then I can have an outstanding season, then I can play on the national team again,” Press said. “I don’t have anything ruled out. But the most important thing for me right now is just the first step: getting back into training.”

With that first step now imminent, Angel City has not yet given an estimated return for Press in a NWSL match. The team is currently in 12th place in the standings through 11 matches played.

The timing also should prove a tough turn for Press to get herself into Olympics contention with the USWNT. New USWNT head coach Emma Hayes is expected to name the 18-player roster by the end of the month ahead of the final two send-off matches in July, but considering the depth of the forward pool and Press’ absence for two years, a return to the USWNT is far more likely to be a long-term goal.

“If you’re looking from a nine month perspective, I’m already past that right,” Press added on Monday. “A 9-12 month ACL perspective is not too far off, if we just look at my last surgery. But for whatever reason, I never really looked at the Olympics. With all the trauma of missing the World Cup, then watching the World Cup, then doing the show for the World Cup, I was like, I can’t do this again with the Olympics, because no matter how chill or zen I seem when I talk about it, there’s no way your mind can’t start doing the math, right? There’s no way. I’m like, ‘Oh, I’m not like every other athlete, I can handle this.’ Then I’ll catch myself in the middle of the night counting how many weeks I have left. You can’t stop that. You can’t stop the dreaming, and you want that. That’s part of it, but it’s also the torturous part of it, and the balance of trying to believe you can do something incredible hard and the balance of not getting too excited.”

[onelittlespiral]

I'd like your BOGO offer. I am the scrawny waterboy for my college. I'd like the kicker of the football team to get taken down a peg or five. I want him to be a nerd and no one else remembers him being a jock.

Subject: Order #100567

Dear (REDACTED),

Thank you for your recent purchase from The Spiral, home for all your transformation needs! Your order #100567 has been received and is on its way as we speak. Your order includes:

(1) Nerd(Assort)_From_Football(Kicker)

(1) Mystery(Self)

Expect delivery in 3-7 days.

Sincerely,

The Spiral

We knew you’d come around and round and round and round…

You had seen just yesterday that your order from The Spiral had finally come through. When you saw some nerd hanging around the practice field, you checked your inbox for the email confirmation. They had provided some details on how they had done it. As the kicker had been leaving practice, they grabbed him and pulled him into an empty supply room. They had him bound and gagged before stripping him of his cleats and cramming his feet in a pair of penny-loafers. The changes, they said, were near instantaneous. Change rippled up his legs as muscle deflated and his lower pads turned to cargo shorts. His stomach flattened and his jersey and pads changed into a sweater and bow tie. He had shrank so much that his restraints had nearly come loose, not that he would be able to fight the men holding him now.

He was already defeated by the time his new glasses were slipped on, which triggered phase two of his changes. Any and all past as a jock we’re gone in an instant, replaced with memories of his advanced mathematics degree and research projects. His memories of summer workouts and practice were now late nights in the library. Football games turned to Quiz Bowls. His mind would no longer be focused on working out his body, instead it was filled with stretches and skills for prepping himself for bottoming. His IQ was shooting up, and he could now understand exactly how to calculate an integral and when to squeeze tight around a dick to elicit the deepest grunts. The team packed up as he was left tied up, growing hornier at the thoughts of his old teammates dominating him like they did the opposing teams…

You couldn’t believe the efficacy of service. Hats off to them for the quick turn around. But you knew you were supposed to get a delivery of your own. You were tired of waiting. But as you were walking home from practice, after scrubbing out bottles and avoiding harassment from the team, you noticed something off. It was strange, but you thought you had smelled one of those jocks following you around. You turned around, worried that some guys were following you home, but the streets around you were empty. Instead, the smell was still coming from behind you, in your book bag. Rolling your eyes, you searched the pockets, expecting to find a jock or some other nasty garment as a dumb prank, but you instead find a chain, buried down at the bottom. In an instant, you feel compelled to hold in in your hands and take a whiff. The scent is metallic and cold how you would expect, while at the same time rancid and wet. You don’t fight the urge as your hands open the clasp and secure it around your neck. The feeling is electric. Your body ripples in response, and you feel your body begin to ache. The cold metallic feeling reaches into your bones and fills your veins with ice. A cold sweat breaks out of you as your body stretches taller and your muscles are filled with cool, hard lead.

I have to get warm, you think, I have to.

Your body seems to respond, as peach fuzz erupts from every inch of your chest, itchy and burning like fire. You scratch, and the hair only grows more in response. It begins to curl around your callousing hands and take root up your arms, spreading its fiery tendrils. You make the mistake of scratching your face, where it also takes root, as a beard erupts from your baby face. The hot licks of fire and freezing spikes of ice is reaching a crescendo as your body is engulfed, ready to reach a melting point and boil off all together when finally… it stops. You are left panting like a dog, sweat dripping from every pore. You knew the transformations offered were powerful, but you never expected this. You take stock of your furry, sweaty body, inspecting every inch of muscle. You feel so… powerful. Flexing your guns and let out an animalistic shout.

But then, something begins to tickle your nose. It smells like the necklace has surrounded you in that layer of stench. Except, it isn’t the necklace. It’s you. Your own sweat is beginning to dry and fill your head. Your past rolls off your brain like the sweat rolls down your washboard abs. Drop by drop you are no longer a waterboy for your football team. You hardly can even understand the sport. You have spent the last few years perfecting your reps and carving your physique. College sports? Who cares. You were lucky enough to graduate high school. You only saw those guys when they needed a personal trainer like you to give them an extra little boost. Those boys spent most of the game standing around. Real men need stamina. And you knew a cardio routine that would get their hearts racing. Bottoming for you was an hours long affair that left boys like them sore, sweaty, and moaning for more. Just how you liked them. You got up off the ground, dusted yourself off, and smirked in the mirror.

Gotta meet my next client in an hour, you think, sticking your tongue out.

In your pocket, you receive an order confirmation from some company called “The Spiral”. Whatever, probably some scam…

Subject: Order #100567 Fulfilled

Dear (REDACTED)

Your order has been fulfilled. We know you have many options, but thank you for supporting The Spiral.

Sincerely,

The Spiral

[khunyuki]

"I've lived my life with blade and you always in my mind"

ꜱɪᴅᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ: 𝚌. 𝚆𝚎 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛, 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚠𝚎?

Synopsis: After their very first mission as Defense Force Officers, Kagami and Soshiro promised to take care of each other when they got injured. That means taking the entire day/week off just to nurse them back to health. A few years have passed since then without any significant injuries, that's why it came as a surprise to Kagami when a certain someone came knocking at the First Division's front doors.

Pairing/s: Hoshina Soshiro x Fiancee!OC

Note/s: I'm posting this first cuz jealousy, jealousy was hard to write hahaha. It might take long but i'll definitely be posting that later tonight. Don't worry cuz reading this first doesn't affect anything hehe. Also, I changed the synopsis so readers won't be confused hehe. Enjoy <3

Genre: Fluff

Masterlist: TOC, a, b

A few years back, when Kagami and Soshiro were still in the same division, they made a promise to each other.

"You were pretty reckless"

Kagami scolded the purple haired guy laying on the hospital bed with a bandages on his legs. Her words, heavily laced with concern.

"I could say the same with you"

Soshiro side eyed the black haired girl who was laying on the hospital bed besides his own. Her injuries were as bad as his, with the bandages on her head instead of her legs.

Kagami just averted his gaze, focusing instead on the fruits basket placed atop the drawer besides them. She picked up an apple, along with a small knife and plate, and started cutting it.

Soshiro could only sigh at his fiancee's evasiveness, though it did bring back the smile on his face. It wasn't unusual for them to be injured during a mission given their line of work. Most of the time, they'll get a few minor scratches here and there but not enough to guarantee a hospital stay. He was glad she only required a few stitches and that there weren't any lasting effects to her head.

"That, I want mine cut into bunnies"

Soshiro noticed that she finished cutting and requested for her to style it into bunnies. Without question, she did just that. He watched as she struggled to peel only the skin and not the flesh, laughing when she failed to do so.

"It's not funny"

Kagami complained with a pout, knowing full well that her struggling gives him joy. She once again heard his chuckle as she successfully massacred another slice. She looked at the mess in front of her and frowned. Cutting things was easy but peeling them was harder, especially if it's as small as this apple.

She can't complain though, this was one of her duties as his future wife. She's been practicing for this her whole life yet continued to fail over and over again. It didn't mean she'll give up as she uses her failure as her drive to do better.

"Want me to do it?"

Soshiro offered his help, still smiling in amusement as she shook her head no. Every little things she does brings a smile on his face, even something as small as failing to peel an apple properly. He'd find her words and actions as funny no matter how she thinks it isn't. Her reactions are so amusing to him, causing him to not stop trying to tease her.

Thank goodness she was skilled enough not to cut her fingers though or else he would've snatched that knife faster than she could react. No way he'd allow her to be hurt on his watch. It was already unfortunate enough for them to be in different squads thus resulting in their current situation, had he known he would've done better.

"I'm done"

Kagami declared and ate the massacred apple slices by herself.

"Wait, wait! I thought that was for me?"

Soshiro tried to stop her from eating it all and not leaving some for him.

"It was... but it's ugly so I can't give it to you"

Kagami was kinda upset she didn't get to make apple bunnies properly so she decided to eat it as to not waste food.

"Feed it to me"

Soshiro, in all seriousness with open eyes, demanded she stop and feed it all to him. No way he's letting all her hard work go to waste. She cut and peeled it for him so he'll eat it no matter what.

"W-what?"

Kagami was surprised at his sudden demand. She couldn't resist him, especially not when he opens his eyes to show her how serious he is.

"I said feed it to me~"

With a mischevious grin, he was back to his foxy attitude. He opened his mouth in an 'ahhh', showcasing his want to be fed.

"Y-you can do it yourself!"

Flustered, Kagami tried to look away. Offering him the entire plate so he could eat by himself.

"But my legs are injured and I can't move"

His eyes were closed but how was it possible to see him making puppy eyes at her? Paired with that pout, a fox like him acted like a sad dog.

"You can move your hands though"

Resist. Resist the temptations Kagami! Do not move your hands! Stop moving your hands!

"Ahhh~"

Opening his mouth, Soshiro was successfully fed by the red faced Kagami. His purple eyes bore holes into Kagami's own as he teasingly licked his own lips as an expression.

"Yum~"

Uzui Kagami.exe has stopped working.

"Excuse me but can you do your flirting elsewhere? The rest of us wants to sleep in peace"

A random officer mustered his courage to speak up. He tried to hide his flustered face by pretending to cough. The rest of the officer were looking away from them, red in the face, yet still nodded in agreement.

Kagami dropped the plate she was holding and teleported inside the blankets of her own bed. The plate of apples was fortunately caught by cackling Soshiro who was well aware of their audience.

Nobody said they were the only ones in the room hehe.

.

"Kagami? Why are you still here?"

Kagami, who was discharged yesterday, came back the next day to take care of her fiance.

"I took a day off"

"Why?"

Surprised by her actions, Soshiro couldn't help by ask why she would specifically ask for a day off when she's never done so before. Also, he was supposed to be discharged later today.

"I want to take care of you... because you're my fiancee"

"Then next time, I'll be the one to take care of you"

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~

Whenever Soshiro visits the hospital, he thinks of that moment fondly. When they were still rookies, they would sometimes end up getting injured thus resulted in taking care of each other. Now that they were a bit more experienced, they no longer had to take care of each other in the hospital. It was better that way as it signifies that they were healthy and safe.

Still, as he reads the newspaper on his hospital bed, he couldn't help but let his mind wander in his wish to have his fiancee be there to take care of him. It was fine though, cause he didn't know how to break the news of him moving to the Third Division to her just yet. Also, he never really told her he got injured during his visit there.

When Captain Ashiro and Platoon Leader Ebina visited him earlier, he thought it was her. He was a bit disappointed but the offer they brought was enough to lift his spirits. He'd been wanting this for a long time. Someone who recognizes his efforts and need his strength. Somewhere he would be needed and not be treated like a tumor.

Kagami had always been by his side, supporting him, and finally there was someone else who believes in him like her. He wants her to join him there so they could leave the past and look forward.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door and a familiar head peek inside. Soshiro saw the face of the person he'd been expecting to see the whole time. His heart fluttered when he saw her after thinking about her like he manifested her visit.

"I'm sorry I'm late. There was a long line at the cafe so it took a bit too long to buy this"

She headed inside and showed him something she was hiding on her back. In her hands was a small box with a dessert inside.

"Is that what I think it is?"

"Yeah. Mont Blanc!"

Kagami mirrored his excitement and confirmed his thoughts. She immediately prepared it for him, getting a plate and taking the dessert out of the box. She carefully placed it so as to not destroy its looks and offered it to him, which he accepted gratefully.

"By the way, I saw Captain Ashiro exiting the hospital earlier. Who do you think she visited here?"

Once she passed him the dessert, she took a seat at the chair beside him. He also took a bite before answering.

"Oh that, Remember how I went to the Third Division for a meeting? This and that happened and Captain Ashiro asked me to join the Third Division"

Soshiro recounted the story of what happened as soon as he got to the Third Division, the sudden appearance of a kaiju and how he helped with it, how he saved that kid and them being saved by Captain Mina, then the lastly, the offer given to him by the captain. Kagami attentively listened to his tales, reacting appropriately during significant parts. Soshiro greatly appreciates her lending an ear.

"Oh really? What was your answer?"

Finally, Kagami asked him what his answer to the offer was. It was something he had to prepare himself first before telling her as it was a big decision.

"I said yes"

Soshiro was filled with certainty at his decision. He didn't know how she'd react but he wanted to ask her to be with him as he moved too.

"Kagami, do you--"

Soshiro was cut off by an excited Kagami.

"Congrats! That's amazing! I knew there would be someone else who will recognize how great you are! I didn't think it would be THE Captain Ashiro Mina herself!"

She was so hyped up, so happy for him that he couldn't help but chuckle fondly. The tension he felt earlier disappeared and was replaced by fondness, feeling incredibly light.

"I'm sad that you'll be leaving but this is your chance to show the people from our division that they never should've underestimated you"

Her smile dropped once she thought that him moving was him leaving her alone. But still, she was smiling.

"Do you want to come with me? Captain Ashiro said her offer extends to you, as well"

Soshiro with greater courage now, seeing her smile drop, wanted to lift her spirits up. If he's moving to a better place, he wanted her to come with him too. At least they'll be together and won't be sad.

"Ehh? Really?? She's offering me to join the Third Division too???"

Surprised, Kagami couldn't believe her ears. Even her eyes as he nodded to affirm her words were true.

"Yeah, so what do you say?"

Soshiro turned back to his Mont Blanc to finally finish it as there only a few bites left. In doing so, he couldn't notice the storm brewing in Kagami's eyes.

"I'm sorry but I will have to decline"

Soshiro almost choked at her flat-out refusal. She offered him water in which he gratefully drank. He didn't think she'd refuse him like this. Sure she'd have doubts but usually she's agree with him.

"Why?"

Kagami took her time to answer and Soshiro found it hard to read her in that moment. Just when he started to think that something might be wrong, she looked him in the eyes with a determined expression.

"I also want to be recognized by my skills and not just because of goodwill. I want to prove myself to her so she'd be the one asking me to join herself"

While he didn't think she'd refuse him earlier, her explanation made a lot of sense. He'd refuse her too if it was him in her position. He only got this far because she and he believed in himself. They've both been doing their best to be the best version of themselves hoping someone will notice their efforts. So he wanted to believe she can do the same too.

"If it's you, I know you can do it"

Filled with the confidence that she shared with him, he ruffled her hair as they shared a hearty laugh.

They spent the entire day with each other. Kagami taking care of him until it was time to leave and Soshiro not wanting her to leave at all cuz he's such a baby when it comes to her. He didn't have to worry though cuz her days off lasted until he got better.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~

True to her words, Kagami finally got someone else to see just what she is made of. While it may not be the captain of the Third Division that she caught the eye of, it was still a significant someone. That someone being the previous captain of the First Division and now the Director General of the Defense Force, Shinomiya Isao. It took a long time but she was finally there.

It wasn't an exaggeration to say that being in the First Division was hard. With everyone exceeding expectations by being capable of eliminating honjus on their own, the stakes are really high. Especially for a recently promoted Platoon Leader like Kagami, who didn't know just when she'll be kicked out. She wonders why she got promoted at all despite there people being stronger than her in the First Division.

It also wasn't an exaggeration that the kaijus appearing near the Ariake Maritime Base were stronger than most. So when the new recruits in her squad finally had their first mission, she had to be more alert than ever. Cuz new recruits are prone to danger, like the one she just saved from accidentally killing himself. Unfortunately for her, being around danger means she's also prone to getting injured.

"I'm really sorry, Platoon Leader Uzui!"

The new recruit she saved once again bowed down in front of her. He was the reason her left arm is in a cast, letting it heal naturally. It was an accident where a hidden yoju suddenly appeared catching them off guard. Kagami chose to prioritize her subordinate's safety than hers which lead to the current situation.

The application of using the regenerative ability of the kaijus in medical treatments was still being researched and is currently in its experimental stages, thus making it exclusive only to Defense Force higher ups.

Being a Platoon Leader, Kagami was lucky enough to be able to take part in it. Instead of suffering from a mangled arm requiring surgery, the treatment made it possible for her arm to heal quickly by mending her broken bones. In the end, it is still required for her to heal naturally and not move it much.

"Don't worry about it. I'm just glad you're safe. I don't want my subordinates to get hurt under my watch"

Kagami reassured the officer in front of her by placing her right hand on his arm. The officer was overwhelmed by the kindness she's showing that caused him to be emotional.

"Platoon Leader..."

"If you're really sorry, make sure you work hard to get stronger from now on"

Knowing what she said wasn't enough to remove his guilt, she encouraged him to be better.

"Yes, ma'am!"

The soldier saluted and finally left her alone. Kagami was about to leave as well when Vice Captain Hasegawa approached her. She greeted him with a salute and he nodded in return.

"You are as kind as ever, Platoon Leader Kagami. I know you want to save as many people as possible but you should not sabotage your health"

He complimented her, referencing about her interaction with an officer. He also scolded her for getting injured badly in concern.

"My apologies, sir. Umm... Is there something wrong? Is Captain Narumi causing trouble again?"

She gave a sheepish smile knowing she'll do it again if it mean saving someone. Though she couldn't help but noticed the troubled expression on his face which only means one thing: Captain Narumi.

"Somewhat. It has something to do with your visitor"

"Eh?"

Captain Narumi was causing trouble because of her visitor? But she wasn't expecting anyone to come visit her? Also, she didn't understand why the Vice Captain himself would tell her the news.

"You'll understand soon enough. Follow me"

Noticing her confusion, Vice Captain Hasegawa led her to where Captain Narumi and her visitor were.

As they got closer to the meeting room, she could hear Captain Narumi's boisterous voice. It was so loud that she didn't have to strain her ears to know that it was him. And there was also a familiar laughter coming inside the room. There's no way...

When Vice Captain Hasegawa opened the door for them to enter, she finally understood why Captain Narumi was reacting that way. Her fiancee, Vice Captain Hoshina Soshiro, was sitting in front of her Captain. His smug smile and foxy expression was clear enough for her to know that he's been teasing the guy the whole time.

"Vice Captain Hoshina?"

"Ahhh, you're here?"

Soshiro averted his gaze at his self-proclaimed rival to look at his fiancee, pointedly staring at her casted arm. His smile, straining a little bit with a frown.

"Today, I am here to request that Platoon Leader Uzui Kagami take a day off from work while she heals"

He finally revealed his intentions after seeing the two sitting down. Captain Narumi and Vice Captain Hasegawa were shocked at his request. They were expecting something else and didn't stop to think of such an absurd reason.

"Haaaa??? Who are you to ask for that with my Platoon Leader, haaa??"

Captain Narumi, having composed himself first grew more irritated. How could his rival talk for his Platoon Leader like that? His friend has a mind of her own and can request to rest by herself. He knew she was injured and wanted her to rest himself but having his rival demand that bring a bad taste to his mouth. It's not like he's forcing him to work, damn it.

"I'll say it in word you can understand. My fiancee is hurt and I demand you let her rest"

Fiancee?? They turned their heads to look at the blushing woman, embarrassed for being the source of this mess and the attention she's getting.

"Don't tell me you specifically came here just to ask that?"

She tried to compose herself by looking his way. Surely that wasn't the sole reason he came here?

"Of course, you wouldn't do so otherwise. Ah don't worry, I got permission to leave from Captain Ashiro so I could take care of you"

That's it. That's the end of her. How could he say such things so calmly in front of her superiors? She's sure as hell this would reach the ears of the whole division and they would not let her live it down. She couldn't even hide her face cause her free hand is too small to cover it.

"I have paperwork"

"That's fine. You can just bring it home and I'll help you"

Kagami can't do this anymore. Her superiors are digging holes into her and her fiancee's finds it too amusing to help her.

"Captain, Vice Captain, can I request for a leave until I heal enough to get back to work?"

Kagami asked for permission herself, trying to save herself despite it being a futile attempt. There's no stopping Soshiro when he's this stubborn.

"I'll grant you paid leave"

Vice Captain Hasegawa felt pity for his subordinate, who clearly want to bury herself in a hole, thus granting her wish.

"Thank you, sir"

Kagami stood up as fast as she could and left to go to her room. She ignore the curious glances thrown her way by confused onlookers, who rarely get to see her running and flustered.

Soshiro who was left inside the room stared at his rival, who was uncharacteristically quiet. He felt pity and at the same time doesn't for he knows what the male in front of him feels for his fiancee.

His phone vibrated indicating that he received a message.

"I'm heading down soon. Meet me at the lobby. Also, please stop torturing my Captain"

"Well then, i guess I'll have to leave now too"

Soshiro stood up and said his goodbyes and thanks as he pocketed his phone. He's looking forward to the spending the rest of the day, and the days after that with his fiancee.

[jowrites]

At Her Mercy - Lee Heeseung

TW: FLUFF. SMUT. Heeseung is obsessed. SMUT. oral(f recieving) squirting, missionary, sex talk, kisisng, groping, hickeys, uhm yeah? unprotected sex. Enjoy!

Deep cut. If there was one way to describe her it would be a deep cut. She was like a deep cut on his skin that stung and never seemed to get better. No matter how many bandages you would put on it, it would still be deep and leave a pretty scar. He didn’t mind, he wouldn’t even try to heal it or fix it. He wanted all of it: the blood, the pain, he wanted it all. Because if it meant she stayed and never left, he would gladly take it.

Heeseung doesn’t remember when he started liking her. He remembers seeing her walk by and he could smell her perfume, it was sweet unlike anything he’s smelled before. It wasn’t like candy, it was more like he was being transported into a fairytale. When he turned around and watched her waltz off, greeting her friend who embraced her, he could see just how beautiful she was. It made sense for her aroma to compliment her features the way it did. And since then, he would steal every glance he could her way and admire her very being. Everyone knew about his obsession with her. He was the Captain of the Basketball team after all, and everyone else was dying for his attention yet he always seemed to be staring at somebody else. And she wouldn’t give him the time of day. 

“Did you hear about YN?” His best friend, Jake, came up to him.

“No? What about her?” He asked.

“She broke up with her boyfriend.”

Oh. 

This was actually the first time he heard she had a boyfriend. So that explains it. Why she never faltered or gave him the time of day when he just craved her attention. She had someone else she was wasting her time on. Heeseung chuckled to himself, in disbelief that someone would be dumb enough to fumble someone like her. Jake has heard him rant about his liking towards YN, just how perfect she was. Jake would just listen as his friend raved on and on about his crush, letting him fanboy and relish in his fantasies.

With this newfound information, Heeseung decided it was the perfect time to finally go for her. One thing about Heeseung, he never lost. And he never stopped, he never gave up, and he would never give up until he had her. 

****************

“Tell me why we’re going again? Don’t you have a book report due or something?” Sunoo said, unamused and bored as he laid on YN’s bed.

“I finished it,” YN said as she tossed some clothes onto the bed. 

“Ugh, nerd,” Sunoo said, rolling his eyes at his friend.

YN stood in her pink lace lingerie as she went through her wardrobe trying to find an outfit for a party they were invited to. Of course, she had to drag her best friend along despite his protests. He was not very thrilled to be tagging along, he much rather preferred to stay home and watch movies and eat as much food as he had access to. Parties weren’t his thing. 

“Fine, if we’re going I’m going to get super drunk and you can’t stop me!” Sunoo said, standing up and going across the hallway to his own room to change. YN smiled in victory, she knew Sunoo couldn’t say no to her, and as much as he hated parties, he liked drama and there was always drama at parties.

“Should I wear a bra or go braless?” YN yelled from her room.

“It depends on what you’re wearing, you can just wear your bra as a shirt and put your jean jacket on and jeans. It looks cute like that,” Sunoo said, coming out and quickly buttoning up his own shirt. “Yeah, definitely wear that, your tits look amazing.”

“You don’t think it’s too much? You can literally see my nipples,” YN said, looking at how the lace was so see through, her whole chest was on full display for the eyes to see.

“Only if people look close enough, which they definitely will but who cares? Boobs are great.”

YN shrugged and found some bell bottoms and buttoned them up, finishing the outfit with a jean jacket that matched the jeans. She already had her makeup and hair done, quickly touching up her lipgloss and grabbing her keys and phone.

“Are you ready? Let's go.”

***************

When YN and Sunoo got to the party, the party was already full of life. Music was blasting, people were going in and out, someone was already throwing up in the bushes by the porch. YN scanned the room, smiling at some of her friends who approached her and Sunoo, Sunoo quickly greeting them as they dragged the two to get some drinks. All eyes were on YN, girls digging their eyes at her in envy and men watching her like she was the best slack of meat they’ve ever seen. Heeseung immediately took note when his friends pointed her out. Not once were his eyes leaving her figure. 

“Don’t you ever get tired of it?” Her friend, Yena, asked as YN took her first shot.

“Tired of what?” YN asked.

“All the stares? I know it would make me uncomfortable,” Yena said.

“You just learn to ignore it,” YN shrugged her shoulders as she poured Sunoo a drink.

“Thank you, lovely,” Sunoo said, kissing her cheek. “She has me to scare off any predators.”

“No offense Sunoo, but you’re not very intimidating,” Yena said.

“Oh, no he is. Sunoo can be very terrifying,” YN defended. “He can rip you to shreds with his words, that’s scarier.”

“Don’t get on my bad side, sweetheart. I don’t play nice,” Sunoo winked and Yena chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“Whose bad side do I have to worry about?”

Yena’s eyes went wide as Sunoo and YN turned around at the noise. Heeseung stood behind them, coming up and invading YNs space as he grabbed a cup, towering over her and not once leaving eye contact.

“Oh great, another one,” Sunoo said, rolling his eyes and downing his drink. “Mind making me one, Captain?”

“Do you want me to make you one?” Heeseung asked YN, ignoring Sunoo as Sunoo rolled his eyes and scoffed.

“No but you can make Sunoo one,” YN said, grabbing Sunoo’s cup and handing it to Heeseung.

“Of course, love,” He said, his breath landing on her face filling her senses.

“I’m just gonna go…” Yena said, grabbing their friend Yeji and leaving the bar. Sunoo folded his arms over his chest and watched with a bored expression as Heeseung slowly made their drinks. Sunoo noticed as Heeseung kept glancing at YN, and it was embarrassing. YN was looking around the bar in search of her favorite beverage, letting out a “AHA!” When she found one, grabbing two white claws out of the mini fridge and opened one.  She took a straw from the table next to everything and began to sip on her drink in content.

“You prefer white claws over hard liquor?” Heeseung asked.

“I’m not much of a drinker,” She replied. 

“She’s not allowed unless we’re home,” Sunoo said as he took his drink from Heeseung, Heeseung glaring at him.

“She’s an adult, she doesn’t need a babysitter,” Heeseung said in annoyance.

“Oh trust me, she does when she drinks. Let’s go, babe, I’m bored,” Sunoo said, eyeing Heeseung up and down and grabbing YNs hand and walking off. 

YN followed, giving a small wave to Heeseung but not giving him another glance. Heeseung’s jaw clenched, downing his drink and crushing the cup and walking the opposite direction. He walked back to his friends and sulked in the corner as he watched YN dance with Sunoo. He could see her chest on full display as she moved her body, swaying to the music. He could still smell her perfume from his spot in the corner as he watched her. 

Throughout the night, Sunoo became more and more drunk. He laughed with his friend, giving her small kisses on her face, and expressing his love and gratitude for her. YN would smile and just encourage him to drink water. She Loved her best friend and he was a fun drunk, but he was also a very touchy drunk and she didn’t want anyone getting the wrong idea. Heeseung was watching the scene all night, his jaw clenching all night every time Sunoo’s lips found YNs skin. Why couldn’t that be him?

YN decided it was time to go. She was barely able to hold up Sunoo in his state, wrapping an arm around him and trying to usher him out. Heeseung watched as Sunoo almost lost all balance and dragging YN down with him. He knew it was time to step in then.

“Do you need help?” Heeseung came up, grabbed Sunoo and YN looked up at him with sorry eyes.

“If you don’t mind? He’s a lot bigger than me,” YN said.

“Of course, I have a car,” He said.

“Are you sober enough to drive?” She asked.

“Oh trust me, Sunoo pretty much made me lose my vibe,” He said.

“Yeah, sorry about him, he gets really protective,” YN said.

“It’s okay, I’d be protective over you too if I could. Let’s get him to my car.”

YN nodded, helping Heeseung drag a very drunk Sunoo out of the house and down the road where Heeseung’s black Jeep was. After they helped Sunoo in the back, Heeseung opened the passenger door for YN, her body rubbing up on him as he helped her in. His eyes never once left her frame as she sat in. He rushed to the other side and leaned over, grabbing the seatbelt for her, his face inches from hers causing her to gasp. He slowly buckled her seatbelt for her, noticing as heat rushed on her cheeks. 

“You didn’t have to do that,” she whispered.

“I wanted to.”

YN was feeling conflict. She of course knew of Heeseung and his infatuation with her, but she never felt the need to act on it. She knew about heeseung and his reputation, and she didn’t want to be just one of his girls so she always kept to herself and minded her business. Even being in his car, taking in his scent and being in his presence like this had her mind screaming at her. She wasn’t anyone's toy to mess with. 

“Where should I take him?” Heeseung asked as he started the car.

“Oh, just back to our apartment,” YN said. “I’ll show you where, it’s not far from campus.”

Heeseung nodded, not realizing her and Sunoo lived together. I guess it made sense since they were best friends. He lived alone of course, his parents buying him his own place when he went off to University. He preferred it that way, having his privacy. He wondered if it bothered Sunoo hearing as her ex-boyfriend touched her behind doors. Just thinking about it made his knuckles go white as he squeezed the steering wheel. 

As Heeseung pulled up in front of their apartment, he parked and turned off the engine, quickly rushing out and opening the passenger door again for her. She thanked him and opened the back where Sunoo was passed out. YN sighed in defeat, shaking her head at the sight. Heeseung helped her grab Sunoo, both of them helping him out of the backseat and Heeseung holding most of his weight as YN tried to balance him. She gave his cheeks a few smacks, hoping it would sober him up enough to walk with them. It didn’t.

YN led Heeseung towards the elevators and together they managed to make it to her apartment and help Sunoo in his bed. YN shook her head at her friend, quickly tucking him in and leaving a water bottle on his night stand and bringing his bin closer to the side just in case he had issues in the middle of the night. When YN closed his door, she noticed Heeseung was still there, his arms folded over his chest as he stood in her kitchen, lost in thought.

“Thank you, Heeseung. You have no idea how much you made tonight easier for me,” YN said, giving him a smile. “Would you like some water before you leave?”

No, but I’d like you.

“No, no I’m fine, thank you,” Heeseung straightened up and smiled. 

“Okay well, I definitely owe you a coffee or something to repay you,” she said.

“How about you come to my game next Friday? I’d love for you to be there,” Heeseung suggested.

“Oh, next Friday?” YN rubbed her neck, thinking about how to get out of this.

“Come on, it won’t be so bad. Plus, you’ll get to see the star of the basketball team in action,” Heeseung winked, making a blush form on her face.

“Ah, and here I thought you weren’t going to be full of yourself,” YN teased.

“I have every reason to be, if you come you’d understand,” He said.

“Okay, I’ll try to make it. I don’t like basketball though, it’s boring,” YN said and Heeseung gasped, pretending to be hurt.

“I am completely offended,” He said as YN and him started walking down the hall to the door.

“I said what I said,” She stuck out her tongue and he laughed. 

“I’ll see you around, YN,” He said. “Also, don’t be a stranger, I don’t bite.”

*********************

The buzzer buzzed causing an uproar in the stands. Cheers began around her as she sat there looking at the score. Heeseung threw the last shot, making it into the hoop and winning the game. The game was over, 80-91 was the finishing score as her University team won. The cheers were loud, causing YN to flinch in annoyance, turning to her best friend who sat there annoyed and holding his fingers in his ears to cover out the noise. He gave her a glare and she just chuckled at him, pinching his cheeks and him attempting to bite her fingers. The whole time, Heeseung was watching her. The swelling in his chest is getting bigger and bigger. Throughout the game he couldn’t take his eyes off her. He watched her as she looked at him in amazement, watching the ball go from side to side. 

“Good shot, man! You did it!” One of his teammates said as Heeseung quickly waved them off, walking over to the side of where his crush was sitting. She looked at him and saw him just staring at her, waving her to come over to him. She shook her head, standing up and shrugging. He nodded for her to meet him on the sides and she sighed, nodding back. She waited for the crowds to scurry off as she grabbed Sunoo and brought him down to the court. Sunoo was the most annoyed he’s ever been. He hated basketball and couldn’t believe YN dragged him to one of the games, Heeseung’s to be exact.

“This is so fucking annoying,” Sunoo complained. 

Heeseung emerged from the side again, a towel around his neck as he finished wiping his sweat.

“You came, I’m glad you did,” Heeseung pulled YN in for a hug, catching her off guard.

“Ew! You’re so sweaty!” YN said, pushing him back a bit as Sunoo fake gagged.

“Disgusting,” Sunoo said. “Okay, you saw him, let’s go.”

“Wait, Sunoo don’t be so rude,” YN said, giving Sunoo a look as Sunoo just scoffed.

“Yeah, Sunoo, don’t be so rude,” Heeseung said, mocking Sunoo as Sunoo glared at him.

“Look, we all know your intentions here and I hate to be the bearer of bad news but YN is way too good for you,” Sunoo said.

“Sunoo!” YN said, scolding her friend and nudging him.

“What? It’s true. He’s trying to get in your pants and remember? You said you’d never-” Sunoo began to say just as YN shut him up with her hand.

“He hasn’t done anything to you, stop being so rude! He helped me last week with you so you should actually be thanking him,” YN said.

“Geez, just how much do you hate me?” Heeseung asked Sunoo, venom in his voice.

“Thank you for helping, now let’s go YN!” Sunoo said, grabbing his friend.

“No! Wait!” Heeseung said, grabbing her hand and pushing YN behind him. “I don’t know what I did to you but I’d like to talk to YN alone, please.”

“Sunoo, I think you should go,” YN said.

“I’m just looking out for you,” Sunoo said, hurt in his voice.

“I appreciate that but you’re being very mean and Heeseung hasn’t done anything to deserve that kind of attitude,” YN said. “If you can’t be nice then don’t say anything at all.”

“Fine, fine. Look, I’m sorry for being a dick,” Sunoo said, defeated.

“It’s all good, just can I have my moment with her now?” Heeseung asked and Sunoo sighed, looking between YN and heeseung. YN could see the worry in his eyes before nodding and backing off. 

“I’ll see you at home, okay? Call me, seriously call me if you need anything,” Sunoo said and YN nodded.

“I can handle myself, Sun. I’ll see you at home.”

Sunoo then walked off, taking one more glance as he left the court. He wanted to always protect YN from the big bad wolf, and he knew Heeseung was the baddest of them all. He has seen YN be hurt time and time again, having to be there to witness and watch her get hurt. He only wanted what was best for his best friend. He always managed to scare people away, even going so close as to starting rumors of them together to keep him at peace. He has no romantic feelings for her, but he would do what he could to keep the predators at bay. The way he heard people talk about her made him extremely uncomfortable, and even though she said it didn’t bother her, he knew it did. 

“I’m really, really sorry about him. I really was not expecting Sunoo to act like that,” YN apologized as Heeseung just laughed.

“No, no I get it. I have a reputation and it’s not a very good one,” Heeseung said and YN nodded.

“Yeah, can’t say I haven’t heard,” she said. “You are a really talented player by the way. Congratulations!”

Heeseung winced at her words, annoyance filling his chest. He regretted everything now, at that moment. He used girls around him to try to take his mind off of her, wishing their bodies were her. Of course, he was left unsatisfied and mostly feeling empty. He wanted her so bad and now he could sense that using the girls was just a big mistake, because now she wanted nothing to do with him. And it was only his fault.

“Would you ever give me a chance?” He said, ignoring her statement.

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“I know I have a reputation, YN, a pretty sick one at that. But please, when I tell you those girls meant nothing to me, absolutely nothing, I mean it. I have watched you, I have admired you, and I have tried chasing you and you never once gave me the time of day. But I’m here, in front of you and I’m begging you to please, please give me a chance,” He pleaded, his hands coming up to hold her shoulders, him looking directly in her eyes.

“Heeseung, I-I had no idea,” YN said.

“Please tell me I didn’t fuck up my chance, please, please!” He begged, searching her eyes as a gasp left her lips. 

She really had no idea, and as she looked at him there she wanted to just hold him in her arms and reassure him it was okay. But why was she frozen in place? She didn’t know what to think, her heart wanted to be loved by him, deep down she was glad he wanted her and craved her attention, but the other part was still screaming at her to run so she wouldn’t get hurt. What if he hurts her? Just use her in the end?

“I don’t want to be one of your girls you use and just toss away,” she said.

“No, no, YN,” He said. “Please, give me a chance to show you that I have been and am still completely at your mercy. Let me prove it to you, please.”

“Okay.”

********************

The next day YN woke up to flowers arriving at her door, with small love notes on them. And the following week she woke up to the same thing, again with love letters. For the past month this was happening every week, flower arrangements starting to decorate her apartment. She kept every note and would read them every night. Her interactions with Heeseung were frequent, Sunoo even being impressed with his courting of his best friend, and how Heeseung seemed to be completely at her will. Heeseung would ditch his friends to hangout with them, always holding her books or bag for her if she needed it, anything she mentioned Heeseung would get it for her. Sunoo couldn’t believe just how much of a simp the Basketball Captain was for his best friend. 

It was a Saturday morning when Sunoo heard a knock on their door. YN wasn’t up yet and Sunoo was an early riser. He walked over and opened the door, seeing the big flowers in his face as a smiling Heeseung popped out from behind.

“Oh God,” Sunoo said. “I think we get it.”

“I can’t give my woman some flowers?” Heeseung said as he followed Sunoo in their apartment, placing the flowers down on their small table.

“We’re running out of room, Heeseung. You know what’s an amazing gift? Soju,” Sunoo suggested.

“Yeah, because I’d like to help YN carry you to bed again,” Heeseung teased.

“I stand corrected, you and YN are made for each other. Lame asses,” Sunoo said. “She’s still asleep.”

Sunoo walked to the door then, grabbing his things and leaving Heeseung alone just standing there. Heeseung was starting to get used to Sunoo’s behavior and attitude. Sunoo was sassy and unpredictable. He never mentioned what he was doing or why, he just did. So him leaving Heeseung alone didn’t really surprise him or phase him. 

Heeseung walked down the hallway and silently opened the door to YNs room. He peeked inside, quietly walking in and closing the door behind him. He went over to the bed where he saw her small curled up figure, something he found endearing everytime she fell asleep with him. She grabbed things and always curled up in her sleep. She would mumble things as well and sometimes he would wake up and she was laying sideways. The way this woman had his heart in chains. He was a complete slave for her, her very being was the reason for his existence. 

He got in bed next to her, sitting up against her head board, her body began to move and she mumbled. He moved some of her hair out of her face, her head chasing the feeling as she began waking up. 

“Heeseung?” she mumbled out, still in a dreamlike state.

“Shh, go to sleep, pretty,” Heeseung hushed her. “I’ll be right here.”

“Lay with me?” She asked and he got up, removing his jeans and shirt, and getting back in bed with her. He pulled her body towards him, hugging her and trapping her frame to his. She turned over, their chests touching as she wrapped her arms around him, nuzzling her face into his neck.

“Hmmm, so nice. This is nice,” she mumbled out, a smile going on her face.

“You’re so perfect for me, go back to sleep, love. I’m right here.”

Heeseung fell asleep then. He came over early because he wanted to take her to breakfast, but he’d skip breakfast any day if it meant he got to hold her in bed and sleep next to her. It didn’t take long for him to fall into his dreams, dreaming over caressing her and holding her. He didn’t even need to dream because he was already living his reality. When YN woke up, she was wrapped in Heeseungs arms, not really remembering how he got here. She thought everything was a dream and when she came face to face with his sleeping form, she was glad it wasn’t.

She lifted her fingers and began to trace his face. He looked so peaceful and beautiful when he slept. She could get used to this.

“You know, if you wanted to take a picture, I’d let you take as many as you’d like,” Heeseung mumbled out, not opening his eyes and causing fits of giggles to come out of her mouth.

“I’ll do that later, for now I just want to stare,” she said and he smiled.

“Stare all you want, sweetheart, my face is yours,” he said.

“When did you get here?” she asked.

“Earlier, but you looked so cute I didn’t want to disturb you,” he said, opening his eyes and staring at her.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi,” he said back, both of them just smiling at each other.

They just stared at each other, YN could feel how Heeseung’s chest began to beat faster as she rubbed circles on his skin. Heeseung then realized how close she was, the flush in her cheeks and her tired eyes waking up more and more. He couldn’t help himself, he leaned in quickly and filled the small gap, kissing her lips in a passionate kiss. She moved her lips with his, her fingers gentle on his jaw as their mouths moved in sync. She moaned into the kiss and something in heeseung ignited. 

Heeseung quickly rolled over on top of her, not breaking the kiss. His tongue slipped in her mouth, his kiss getting more and more aggressive. He bit her lips, sucking on them and trailing kisses down her neck. He began sucking on the skin of her neck and collarbone as she lifted her neck up to give him more access. Heat rushed to her core and she could feel herself getting wetter by each touch. 

“Tell me to stop,” Heeseung said, his hands trailing down her sides, going under the large shirt and feeling the skin on her hip, playing with the lace of her panties.

“Don’t,” she said, sighing and Heeseung lifted up, looking down at her.

“Are you sure?” he asked and she nodded.

“Please,” she brought his lips down to hers. “Touch me.”

Heeseung didn’t need to be told twice. He quickly kissed back, lifting up a little and removing her shirt in one go. Her breasts were on full display for him to see, the skin on her neck and collarbone already to color from his actions. He leaned back down and crashed his lips to her with a hungry growl. He kneaded her breasts, squeezing and pinching her nipples, causing small yelps to come out of her mouth. Every reaction he got he felt his erection grow. 

“Baby, look at what you do to me,” he took her hand in his and brought it to his erection where she began to palm through his boxers. 

“More, Heeseung I want more.”

Heeseung trailed kisses down her stomach, his hand placed between her legs and feeling the wetness in between. He pressed his thumb inside, pushing her panties inside. She bucked her hips and moaned at the feeling, her body moving up and down along with his pushing trying to gain some relief. 

“Fuck, you’re so wet.”

Heeseung became impatient then, he grabbed her panties and quickly forced them down as he became face to face with her heat. He gave her thighs a few bites as he lifted her legs over his shoulder and he licked her cunt from top to bottom. She moaned at his actions, him not once taking his eyes off her as he shoved his tongue deep inside. Her body jolted up as she sighed. Heeseung began to abuse her center with his mouth, eating her out like this was his last meal. Her body was shaking, moving side to side and she rode his face. Moans and curses were coming from her mouth as he continued, her wetness and his saliva falling on the bed and everywhere it would get.

He pressed down on her middle, sticking two fingers in and pumping them as he licked her up. She felt the pit in her stomach then, as Heeseung continued giving her core all his attention. 

“Hee, I’m-fuck! Gonna cum!”

“Baby, cum for me. Let me taste you.”

With one more press on her middle, her body convulsed and her legs began to shake. He felt her release all over his tongue, her squirting directly into his mouth and he sucked every bit of it. He pulled his fingers out, sucking and letting her ride out her high.

“Oh my God!” She cried, tears coming from her eyes as her body still shook from her intense orgasm. 

Heeseung leaned back on his knees, watching as her body convulsed and was coming down from her high. He leaned up, taking her lips in his and letting her taste herself. She moaned, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him closer. 

“God, that was so sexy.”

He removed his boxers then, hissing as he grabbed his cock in his hands and pumped himself, feeling the precum leak from his tip. He placed himself between her folds, going up and down and teasing her. She stared into his eyes, nodding as he gave her a quick kiss and pushed his cock in between her core. He pushed all the way in, a gasp leaving her lips before she closed her eyes shut and bit her lips. 

“Baby, you can take it all. God, fuck! You’re so tight!”

He pushed in deeper, hearing her whine from the stretch. He was big. The biggest she’s had and she wasn’t sure if she could handle it. But he didn’t stop. He kissed the tears from her eyes as he finally bottomed out, not moving and letting her adjust. He peppered her face with kisses as she nodded, signaling him to move. He did, pulling out halfway before thrusting all the way in, getting a yelp from her as her body jolted. 

“It’s so big, Hee. Fuck!”

“You got this, let me make you feel good.”

She nodded as he began thrusting in and out, picking up his speed. Her body started matching his movements, her back arching as she began moaning in pleasure. He grabbed her hands and held them over her head as he leaned back, taking her hip and thrusting his hips into her. He looked down where they met, watching in awe as his cock moved in and out of her cunt, seeing their juices mix perfectly together. He looked at her face and saw pleasure as she moaned and whispered profanities. Her breasts bounced with each thrust, his own moans mixing with hers. 

His eyes closed shut as he leaned his head back before looking back down and seeing her look up at him, her eyes glossy as she tried to focus on him. He could feel himself close to release and knew she was close too. He felt her cunt clenching around him as she moaned out for him.

“Cum with me, cum! Fuck! So tight!”

Once he said that she squeezed him deeper, taking him as he hit just the right spot for her. His thrusts slowed as he stilled, releasing inside her and filling her up. She cried out, her eyes rolling in the back of her head as she saw stars. Her cunt sucked him in as she felt him release deep inside, her own release happening along with his. He collapsed on top of her, slowly moving and riding out their highs. Their bodies were gasping for air, him not caring as he grabbed her face and brought her lips to his in a passionate kiss. 

“Baby, that was way better than just some fantasy,” he said, chuckling to himself.

“Mmm, well you don’t need to fantasize anymore,” She said, kissing his lips. “You can come to me now.”

“Since you’re giving me permission, I’d like to take you every day, every night, every morning,” he said, kissing her lips and trailing more kisses down her neck. “I’m completely yours.”

“Thank you for being so patient with me,” she said.

“No, thank you for letting me love you. And I promise to love you and cherish you, like I said, I’m at your mercy.”

[imtryingbuck]

One Step Forward A Hundred Back.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC!Theo

Summary: Bucky has to marry a woman who surprises him more and more as their story goes along.

Word count: 3,243

Warnings: angst. Talks about child abuse. Mentions of past rape. Bucky goes through it all. Swearing. Dot. fluff.. mainly angst though.

Masterlist   Series Masterlist

Throughout the week weirdly enough Bucky and Theo fell into a routine, that routine ending them in his bed with his arms wrapped protectively around her keeping the monsters at bay for her and unbeknownst to her, she was doing the same thing.

Of course everyone knew that they were sharing the nights together though no one said anything, Steve was happy that their marriage was developing. Everyone noticed the change in Bucky's behaviour; he was happier, less snappy now that he was getting a good night sleep.

Over the course of the week they all went to the hospital to visit Wanda, who woke up after two days.

When the redhead found out that Theo had donated blood to her she cried and pulled Theo into a hug, even though the rails to the bed dug painfully into her stomach she paid no mind to it as she wrapped her arms around the woman in the bed.

"Angel you almost ready?" Bucky asked from the bedroom as Theo was getting dressed in the bathroom.

All the clothes that Bucky had brought her was now in his wardrobe thanks to Martha who after washing and drying them had hung them there not knowing her mistake, when Bucky realised he didn't care no he rather liked seeing her clothes next to his.

"A-almost. Okay now I'm done" Stepping out of the bathroom they smiled at one another before Bucky took her hand in his and put it to his lips placing a soft kiss to her knuckles.

"Come on then, operation break Wanda out of hospital is now a go" She giggled at him. Wanda had begged them all to get her out of the hospital on the very same day she had woken up.

"Let's go"

Walking out of the room and down the stairs where the other three who was taking part of the break out was waiting. Nat held her arm out for Theo to take so she did, both women walking out of the house. One oozing confidence and the other simply following the others lead.

"Morning ladies" Clint bows dramatically causing both women to giggle, he opens the door for them to enter-

"No, Theo's with me"

"Never took you to be a possessive husband Buck" Steve laughed.

"I-I'm not I just like her being by my side"

"So... possessive" Nat laughs.

"Oh shut up." Rolling his eyes at the redhead he opens his car door and waited patiently for Theo to get in, shutting the door softly behind her. "I'm not possessive!" he argues when he sees them standing staring at him.

"Sure, sure what ever helps you sleep at night Boss" it's now Sam's turn to laugh but quickly getting into the car he was going to be sharing with Clint, Steve and Natasha.

"I'm not possessive" he mutters under his breath once he was in the car.

"Did you just say something Bucky?"

Oh yeah that was new too.

"No angel, let's bring our friend home"

"Thank god you guys are here! I'm going crazy!" Wanda huffs when they walk in the room.

"You're already crazy Wands" Nat laughed.

"Shut up, please get me out of here!"

Sam shook his head catching the bag that Wanda threw at him. "We're breaking you out now so stop bossing us around"

Breaking Wanda out of the hospital was easy as she was already given the all clear to be released but with both her and Sam being dramatic and wanted to act like they were breaking her out of prison.

"Don't try and stop us Doc! We're busting out of here and there's nothing you can do about it!" Sam practically shouted at the poor man who was just doing his job.

Bucky looked at Theo and shook his head slowly. "These are our friends"

"You wouldn't change them though"

"Well... maybe Sam"

"Oi I heard that" Sam shouts from halfway down the corridor, nearly knocking over a nurse with the wheelchair that was carrying the 'precious cargo' as he called Wanda.

Their breakout out was deemed a success so they headed home. Martha was quick to wrap her arms around Wanda as soon as she saw the girl, making sure she was careful of the wound on her stomach that was slowly healing.

Wanda made everyone join her in the cinema room in the basement for a movie day/night, Sam was on snacks with Clint, Nat's job was to get blankets, Steve's job was to carry Wanda down the stairs - according to her she had no use in her legs despite them all watching her walk into the kitchen going straight for the fridge to get her strawberry milkshake out. Bucky and Theo had to make sure Sam and Clint wasn't eating the snacks they were getting.

No big surprise when the pair walked in on the two men eating said snacks.

"Where are you going?" Bucky's question had her stopping on the stairs

"Upstairs?"

"I see that, what do you need from up there?"

"Nothing…"

Sighing when it clicked "Angel, your invited too you know?"

"It-it's a family thing James, I'll carry on reading that book" dictionary.

"Angel you are family. Come on, please don't leave me alone with them"

"I-are you sure? I don't want to cause any trouble"

He swears she's going to be the death of him.

"I'm sure, married remember?" Though his tone was light and non-mocking she couldn't help but flinch lightly.

"Okay"

Theo and Bucky side by side with a thick fluffy black blanket laid over them, Nat and Wanda cuddled up with their own blanket, Sam and Clint side by side hogging the popcorn - Sam holding the pack in a death grip - and Steve was on the other end with a blanket that had Wanda's face with different facial expressions on it, over him. Theo found out that Wanda had brought it him for his birthday as a gag gift but it backfired on her because he loved it.

The third film to play on the very large screen was in fact Theo's fourth film she had ever seen, during the first film Bucky kept looking over at her loving the way her eyes lit up it reminded him of his niece and nephew during Christmas. What the film that was currently playing was called was lost on her but it was a rom-com, at first Theo was enjoying it until it was coming to the end.

The main male character gets down on one knee and asked the main female character to marry him, she cries with joy and says yes. The next scene was them planning their wedding, and then there was a short bit where the woman tries on wedding dresses in front of her friends and mum. Then the scene came when it was their wedding day, them saying their vows, the priest announcing them man and wife and him telling the man he could now kiss his bride.

As she watched eyes glued to the screen her heart ached.

She was married. She was married but wasn't proposed too. She was married and her and Bucky didn't sit down together stressing over placements, who was able to come or not, there was no them two stressing over where to get married. She was married and she didn't get to go to a bridal shop to try on dresses in front of her friends and mum. She was married but there were no vows, there was no telling Bucky he could kiss his bride.

No. No she was married to a man that didn't want to marry her. No she was married but there was no need for them to stress over placements or who was going or not or-or worry about where it was going to be held because her father held it in a spare room of his home. No she was married and didn't get to go to the bridal shop as it didn't matter if she looked nice or not.

They didn't have wedding rings for Christ sake.

A lone stray tear slipped down her cheek as the newlywed couple on the screen walked out of the church huge smiles on their faces as confetti rained down on them.

Theo knew she wasn't worthy of love, not in the slightest. But she had always wished that a man picked her out any woman he could have, picked her and made her feel like she was his world, his life, his love.

But like she was trained to believe, she wasn't worthy to be loved.

And that's all she ever wanted. To be loved even if it was only for a little while. To be truly loved. All she craved was love.

"T-Theo?"

Looking away from the screen she followed the voice that had said her name, Bucky's bright blue eyes staring at her. "Yes?"

"You're crying..."

"Oh, oh I'm sorry"

"Don't apologise, what's wrong?"

"I-I-nothing I'm fine"

"Bullshit-hey where are you going?" Bucky stands up after Theo gets up.

"Why haven't you asked my father yet?"

"About what?"

"About you being able to divorce me?"

Sucking in a breath he rubs the back of his neck. "Let's go upstairs and talk, please"

She knew that she shouldn't have asked in front of his friends, knowing it was probably embarrassing for him that they to hear that, she nodded and followed words.

The silence left in their wake was loud.

Leading her up to their bedroom, he loved saying that now, he shut the door with a soft thud behind him.

Bucky just stands there and watches her twiddling her fingers growing nervous as he didn't utter a word since leaving the cinema room.

"I'm sorry for embarrassing you in front of your friends" she whispers with her head casting downwards.

"I-you think you embarrassed me? No Theo you didn't. I want to know why you've brought up the divorce thing after we've been getting along this past week"

"Be-because... it's-we don't have a real marriage James and-and you deserve to be happy with someone else, one of my father's daughters will do that"

"Why don't you call them your sisters? That's what they are aren't they?"

His only question threw her off. Why is that the only thing that he takes from what she had said to him. "W-what?"

"Why don't-"

"No I understand what you said but-what?"

"I just don't understand, like my father has a daughter so she's my sister so why don't you call them that?"

"Because I'm his bastard"

"But that shouldn't mean anything"

"I'm not allowed to" Bucky had to strain his ears just to hear the words that came out of her mouth.

"Theo... is this to do with your scars?" his heart sank into the depths of his stomach when she nods. Since that day in his office he didn't bring up the scars or try and have that conversation, truthfully he had been wanting to put it off for as long as he could.

"Theo, please sit down so we can talk"

"Okay" she answered after a few beats of silence, she knew she was going to have to do this even if it scared her.

"Take your time, okay"

The thought of telling him the truth terrified her, for so long since it started it was engrained in her brain that she wasn't allowed to say anything to anyone no matter what, she was made to believe that everything that was happening to her was all her fault and that the only person she could blame was herself.

Releasing a long stuttering breath she wiped her hands on her new leggings that Bucky had brought her, straightening her back she knew that she had to do this in order to free him from this loveless marriage.

"M-my mom died during child birth a-and Eliza made my father bring me to their home, apparently it was a way to remind him of his affair" she started, already struggling to get her words out and she hadn't even started properly. Bucky slid his hand over and placed it over hers squeezing lightly until she turned her hand over for him to link his fingers with hers.

"My earliest clear memory is when I was five a-and Eliza got mad because I was playing with Matt and his toys, she got super mad that she started smacking me really hard on my bum. I remember Matt crying and begging her to stop. From then I was always hit by her a-and sometimes she would get her kids to join in"

Bucky's heart squeezed painfully in his chest at her words. Angry at Eliza for hurting Theo when she was just an innocent little child.

"I don't know why or what I did wrong but it got worse, the punishments got worse. Eliza had made me sleep in the basement it's always so cold down there, w-when I was ten she had one of my father's men strap me up against the wall and she started to whip me on my back"

"Did your father know?"

"Yes, first he was angry at her but I don't know why but he stopped trying to stop her"

"D-did he ever do anything to hurt you?"

"The-the scars on my legs, he did them"

"Theo..."

"It got worse when I turned fifteen. Eliza had men do things...

"Wh-what kind of things?"

"They would have sex with me and Eliza would take money off them, bu-but I didn't want them to do it! I swear" there was a reason for her trying to reassure him that she didn't want the things done to her by strangers and it was because one night Michael had walked in on Jack, Carla's husband having sex with her and he went mad. That night they all took it in turns beating her until Matt ran in and pulled them away from her, it was also the first time she had left the house to go the hospital.

She hadn't realised that she had said all that out loud. Until Bucky choked out a sob.

"Angel… tha-that's rape"

"What's that?"

"What they were doing to you, baby forcing someone to have sex with them is-it's called rape"

"Oh, is-is that bad?"

"It's bad angel-no no listen to me you did absolutely nothing wrong! Nothing" he said quickly when he saw her frowning with tears welling up in her eyes.

"But it's bad..."

"The person doing it to another person is bad but not the victim and that's what you are"

"Oh"

"Theo… is-is there any more?"

"No not really, but that's my life. And that's why you should divorce me, I'm damaged-"

"You're not damaged! Angel I mean it. Please listen to me l know our marriage didn't start because of love b-but if you stay here, with me I promise you that no one and I mean no one will ever hurt you ever again. Theo we-we can make this work, I want to make this work"

"Why I have scars that are horrible to look at"

"Can you take your clothes off and show them to me?"

She had already embarrassed herself once so what's one more time, right?

Nodding she stood and slowly removed her clothes, Bucky looking up at her "May I?" he asked softly though she was confused by his question she nodded once again, gasping lightly when his hands reached out slowly and traced each scar with care.

"Beautiful" he whispered.

"You don't need to lie" she whispered back.

"I'm not lying Theo, you are beautiful. These scars are beautiful, do I wish you didn't have them? Of course then that means you never went through the pain, that you never was scared. Please never question your beauty, please"

Is this love? Does he love her despite seeing the damage done to her skin? Is this acceptance? Does he accept her for who she is? Did he just say I'm beautiful? Is this how marriages work? He thinks I'm beautiful-

"Hey Theo come back to me angel" his soft voice pulled her out of her thoughts, snapping back into reality she finds his eyes softly gazing on her.

"I-I'm sorry"

"Don't apologise to me, ever. Do you want to go to sleep? It's been a long day"

"Okay"

Climbing in to bed after they both did their night time routine they laid side by side when Bucky wraps his arm around her frame pulling her into his chest tight enough for her to hear the rhythmic beating of his heart against her back.

Just as she fell into a deep sleep his voice came from behind her ever so quietly she nearly missed it.

The next morning after telling him everything she had gone through growing up and showing him the scars she's forced to live with in detail she couldn't get how dark his eyes turned with anger at the sight of them but when his eyes flicked up to hers they were soft again out of her mind. She appreciated that he didn't judge her for what she had told him.

The fact that he had wanted to continue their marriage, that he wanted to make it work made her believe that maybe just maybe that Eliza was wrong, that she was capable of being loved.

As Theo walks down the stairs in search of her book she was sure she had left in the living room as it wasn't on the bedside table when she had woken up, her heart sank into the deep depth of her stomach as she walks in on Bucky with Dot who straddled his hips, their lips are locked together passionately.

Neither one of the pair notices her standing there in the doorway until they hear the door creaking; all Bucky sees is the figure of his wife retreating backwards before disappearing down the corridor.

Pushing Dot off of him he runs out of the room in search for Theo. Going up the stairs he heads to their now shared bedroom. His heart pounds loudly in his chest as he watches Theo take the clothes he had brought her out of her side of the wardrobe.

"A-Angel it wasn't what it looked like" He stutters out.

"It is fine Mr James"

"No it's not, please stop and listen to me so l can explain"

"There is no need to explain. You're allowed to have girlfriends Mr James"

"N-no I'm not, we are married Theo."

"It is okay. I promise"

"Where are you going?"

"Back to my old room Mr James"

Bucky stands there with tears in his eyes as he watches as she bows her head to him and leaves the room.

He's so wrapped up in his own turmoil and pain that he doesn't know that as she cries she covers her mouth painfully with both hands or that she softly mutters.

'you're so stupid' ‘you really believed he wanted you' ‘you should of never of shown him, stupid girl' ‘you're not worthy of love' to herself.

She knew the words she thought she had heard last night was only her imagination playing ticks on her.

He has no idea how he can fix this. It’s one step forward a hundred steps back and every time it's his fault.

"I love you Theodora"

<Previous   Next>

Tags: @sapphirebarnes @bellabarnes1378 @unaxv @skulliecadaver-blog @mrsnikstan @sebastians-love @pattiemac1 @julvrs @undf-stuff

[librarycards]

pls ignore this is its too weird or too much labor, but i was wondering if you maybe had any tips or resources for ppl who have creative desires like writing but brain fog and fatigue tends to get in the way?

i do! it may not work for you bc people have very random/unexpected ways of dealing with this, but it's *very* common and there is hope :) [i think a lot of this is applicable across form, but i'm using "writing" here because it's what i'm familiar with]

one way is to be strategic about timing: this includes thinking about when you're least foggy/have the most energy, and/or the most "downtime" where there isn't anything in particular you need to do. many people wake up early so that they have alone time before their responsibilities. some people stay up late to write. i tend to do my daily writing (which I elucidate on below) in the evenings, around 7-10pm. whatever works, works!

relatedly: scheduling/routine is, for me, critical. i think it is for a lot of creative ppl. I write every day, in multiple ways: i keep a journal - i've done this since i was like 12, so it's as ingrained as brushing my teeth and i don't really think about it - and also work on some aspect of my current longest project [so, for the last 4 years, it's been the aforementioned second novel; for the 4ish years before that, it was Failure to Comply. i write other stuff during the daytime, of course, because writing is also my job(s). but if you're looking to establish a consistent creative practice, you don't need to be aiming for a certain hour or word count.

Instead: Aim for consistency and progress. Not perfection, not a "muse," not magic. There is no shame in making something that doesn't seem good, or that you end up deleting. in this particular instance, "perfect is the enemy of good" is 10000% true, and i think especially applicable to people who already experience external + internalized ableist ideologies on a daily basis. your art, regardless of what it is, should be a space where you get to make mistakes, change your mind, and learn new things. it should be something you can come to when you're tired, unsure, confused, scared, etc, even if it means just keysmashing and then closing your notes app for the day.

for me, having a daily practice, regardless of anything, means embracing the days where i write only one word and then despair, as well as the days i write pages. when i feel most depressed, in a very clinicized sense, i try to move from "everything i make now is going to be shitty :(" to "everything i make now is going to be shitty :)", not because i'm happy about it, but because....that's simply part of creating. everything is a bodily function. if you're not feeling good, maybe your poop will look weird. so too with writing. but you still do it. it can be mechanical. but it'll happen, and by doing it consistently, you give yourself the *opportunity* to locate insight hitherto buried, to have an idea creep up on your tiredself.

i guess in sum I'd say that the healthiest thing i ever did for my writing is something tantamount to body neutrality, which has also been an immensely positive addition to my set of frameworks for physical embodimindment. creative neutrality, i guess. this doesn't mean i don't tie my ego and personhood to work/productivity/quality. i mean, i totally do, and it sucks, but there we are. but it also means that i place that in a corner that does not touch my desire to chip away at something big, regularly. i make time every day to summon the urgency of whatever i'm working on, not because i'm proud of it at that moment, but because i want to give it another opportunity to give me something cool.

tl:dr: give yourself the gift of consistency and time, and don't be scared of making stuff that isn't good, or gets deleted, or doesn't make sense. write from wherever you want, physically, mentally, spiritually. give it the opportunity & even the expectation to happen and then work from there.

[ojamayellow]

Earthspark spoilers. It's time for my opinions and theories.

Before I start, I am aware of the writers changing. I will put that into consideration in this. And for the record, I did enjoy Season 2 so far, but I admit it has nothing on S1 for now.

First two episodes were really good, I loved the Breakdad moments, I love Aftermath and we get a glimpse on how the Decepticons have been operating. 2nd episode with the Quintesson gave us some lore and suspense, and I always love a Mo and Thrash tag team. These episodes felt... right for Earthspark, but not as Season 2 starters? If that makes sense.

Hashtag's alt mode is neat, but I miss her chunkiness in robot mode. Made her feel more distinct you know? But I'm with the others saying VAL being an AI in Hashtag's mind is really weird considering what Mandroid did. Maybe she's coping? I have a theory that this VAL might be manipulated in a future episode to control Hashtag, but for the sake of Hashtag's well-being, I HOPE this doesn't happen. (Also, hi Shockwave).

Carnival episode. Is Schloder reduced to an incidental now? I hope not and that he becomes important as well. But also, I figure its a traveling carnival/circus, which makes sense to why we haven't seen this Fairemaestro before, and the little interaction with Swindle shows up 'oh yeah he's a bad guy' already. But you can't just tease a GIANT COSMOS-LOOKING RIDE AND THEN 'OH BTW ITS COSMOS' LAST FEW MINUTES. If Cosmos doesn't show up in later episodes I'll be so disappointed, like...it's freakin' Cosmos! <-Perfect design though. *chef kiss*

I do think the Robby crush on Izzy was cute, but it being involved with the plot felt....eh? It was like, nothingburger to me.

JBAM episode. I LOVED THEM. Jawbreaker has clearly gotten more comfortable with himself and such since Grimlock, but him not taking a hint from Aftermath (who was being direct) reminds me of my younger self. <-Was an insane chatterbox and would not shut up no matter what was said to me.

But the contaminated energon stuff like, yeah callback to that weird bear. Sorry if I forgot, but back in S1, was there a reason GHOST was just leaving it around? I don't remember. And what's with the horrific energon mushrooms, and those poor animals? I know people who are going to be turned off from this show just from that alone, but at least it's 'off screen'? But also Aftermath betraying Jawbreaker hurts, I was hoping he'd like, impress Breakdown with the stolen water BUT NOPE, NO MORE AFTERMATH AND BREAKDAD STUFF. (I know Aftermath was like, not 'what did you just call me' when he was called Son but, cmon!!)

Spitfire episode. I personally think this episode went hard. Gave me Sonic VS Metal Sonic vibes. The fight scenes were really done well, and the tension was so good! To me, Spitfire wanted to be superior but felt inferior when not chosen for the mission, so that desire to be the best consumed her. I'm personally a big fan of this episode, and Alex is awesome. And so was Spitfire, I'm kinda obsessed with her.

Bodyswap episode. Always love a good bodyswap scenario, but somehow this felt... weak. It's plausible for the others to believe Spitfire (as Twitch) had a scrambled processor from the previous episode BUT the fact Wheeljack was the first to catch on? Before a Malto? I'm SO GLAD they referred to Dad2 again but, IDK, feels... strange to me.

Trailer episode. Was kinda nothingburger again? It felt like they needed to add SOMETHING before the horrors of the final two episodes, but maybe I just need to re-watch it because I didn't feel much from it. Optimus was clearly getting aggravated and uncomfortable, which was making me uncomfortable. But also, OPLITA? COMPLICATED? If they don't ever bring this up again I might be a bit...bitter.

And finally, the Witwicky 2-Parter. My anxiety was through the roof here, but I also kinda figured it out early that a Titan was involved. Was still surprised though, and her design is awesome?! But what was making me panic more than anything was Hashtag was going to see Starscream. Yes I know, a one-episode bond may not mean much, but we all had hopes, yeah? Anyway, I love nasty bitch Starscream. It's what makes him Starscream. And I do think what he did was in-character. But it would feel off if Earthspark was someone's introduction to Starscream, you know? This specific one, who's attitude told the audience 'I hate Megatron he abused me so I'd be a better leader than him'. But also...

The scene with him killing the Chaos Terrans was a fucking horror movie. It does a lot when I am SCARED OF STARSCREAM. I wish he didn't do it, but he also needed the shards. If the Autobots/Maltos needed the shards from the Terrans, how would they do it? Would they hesitate to find a safer way to keep the Chaos Terrans alive? Or would there be some sort of urgency? It really makes me think, but Starscream wanted those shards ASAP, he does what he need to do to get what he wants, he's Starscream. A manipulative, traitorous bitch who almost never gets his way in the end.

But you might be wondering, "Kit did you feel like the character development was thrown away for Starscream?" Well, yes and no.

It's really upsetting how Starscream twisted his advice to Hashtag. Truly upsetting. But it also does feel like something a Starscream would do. I keep flip-flopping between "yeah this makes sense" and "um what the FUCK writers". See what I mean by "yes and no?" And Hashtag calling Starscream worse than Megatron AND Screamer taking it as a compliment? Again, very Starscream thing to do, but I think ES! Starscream should've been at least a bit offended?! And out of all bots to call him the worst... Why did it have to be Hashtag? I guess it has more 'meaning', but still...

My theory (or moreso, hopeful thinking) is that Starscream re-invented his advice to Hashtag so he could get detached from her. Starscream had a mission, a personal selfish goal, and he needed to take care of HIMSELF, no friendship. Only comrades willing to follow him, and the Maltos were not those comrades.

My other theory (which I gained from seeing someone on twitter saying this) is that the Chaos Terrans DIDN'T GREY OUT FROM DEATH. Therefore, there is a chance they can return. Maybe something from the Allspark or Matrix or some kinda macguffin will help?! And I sure hope they come back, because they could learn to be good (but still cheeky) and we can bring back the messages and theming from Season 1! Right, right?

As for 'Starscream the child killer'...look, it's upsetting I know. But like I said, selfish goals. And while I am not familiar with every Starscream from different canons, I've met enough versions. Other Starscreams have have committed war crimes, blew up a human hospital, threatened to kill innocents, committed war crimes, wanted to kill everyone to end a war, squished humans in his servos... (yes I know Skybound is more for an adult audience than kids but I'm just saying). War crimes. I am not excusing Starscream's actions here, but when he needs something, he'll do what it takes to get it, for his own selfish goals. It makes sense but I also feel its wrong and I agree with other fans who were quite upset with this scenario. If the Chaos Terrans don't come back I'll be really sad.

Again, I've considered the fact this show has new writers, which is unfortunate. I saw someone on here say that Season 2 (so far) feels like a bootlegged version of S1, which is how I feel about it. I did enjoy the episodes, but they were a bit messy. Also, the lack of Nightshade and honorary family member Bumblebee really made me sad. Was it a script decision, or could they not afford Danny Pudi enough because they used the money on the new cast like Flea? (Don't quote me on like, celebrity net worth here). The lack of Nightshade though is very suspicious though, considering how big of a deal it was for them to exist as a non-binary character.

Side note, Shockwave. I'm glad he finds Cybertron itself more important than creating a New Cybertron, it feels right for him to not care about Earth. But if he going to attempt to lead now? Or something?

If you read this, thanks! If you have any responses feel free to reply or reblog. Feel free to reblog in general, I love hearing opinions and such.

[coal15]

My opinions on the whole multi-shipping Buddie and Tevan situation. But first, [steps up on soapbox and yells into bullhorn] HAVE NO BEEF WITH ANYONE WHO FEELS DIFFERENTLY THAN ME SO I'D REALLY APPRECIATE NOT GETTING ANY "YOUR OPINIONS ARE STUPID AND PROBABLY SO ARE YOU" COMMENTS IN MY REPLIES. **If any such comments do appear in my replies I would ask the rest of you to please simply ignore them. You won't change their minds so confrontation will do nothing but further poison the waters.

Ahem. Carrying on. Warning, this post is LONG. Like, practically a novella.

I'm still a multi-shipper at heart in the sense that I will always love my memories in the Buddie fandom and how vocally we showed our support over the last six years--yes there was a SUPER PROMINENT contingent among us who directly engaged with and verbally disemboweled every actress who played a li on a regular basis, (and who harassed Oliver to the point of him quitting twitter) but most of us had the sense to direct our ranting at the fictional character or writers/showrunner/network with varying degrees of anger or indignation. Now speaking just for myself, in my time as a Buddie fan I never commented on the physical appearance of any li, so seeing a lot of buddie-or-bust folks now referring to Lou as "ugly" "rectangle-faced" "gross looking," etc has been disappointing. I hope they represent the minority. So far it looks like they do.

On to my reasons for and/or role in shutting down non-Buddie romances: While I never took to engaging her personally, I voiced harsh criticism of GW over her "honorary latina" comment, likewise EG for her transphobia and non-apology apology ("I'm sorry if you felt offended). And while I wish bucktaylor had stayed besties (preferably bi besties since there was no reason Buck couldn't have his bi awakening with a woman), my issue with them dating was at first just a lack of romantic chemistry and the fact that Taylor never apologized for what she did to Bobby or even admitted it was wrong. But as the relationship dragged on I watched the life drain out of Buck. They were stagnant as a couple and the look on Buck's face when he said ily back to her was . . . laughably unromantic. The only growth his character got from that relationship was him being the one to end it. As for eddieana, on top of lacking chemistry they were just plain dull. The end.

Moving on to Buck's kiss w/Lucy: I actually like AK and was excited to hear about her coming to 9-1-1. She was fun af as Lexi on VD so I was looking forward to seeing her play a different character. Aaaaannnnnnd then KR immediately ruined her by making it abundantly clear that she was created for one sole purpose: to complicate a man's storyline and spark off a love triangle--and she did so in the most offensive way possible. It was appalling, negatively affected Buck's character, and thankfully KR's response to the intense backlash was to pivot so the love triangle never manifested. But the damage was already done. No one had any interest in watching them poke/flirt for the rest of the season. I was deeply offended by such a misogynistic use of a female character and it still boggles my mind that a woman created her.

Anyhow, all this was a long winded way of saying that my reasons for wanting those li gone went well beyond my investment in Buddie. Though I did strongly believe no romantic narrative for either of them could ever compete w/the Buckley-Diaz Family, at the end of the day those romantic arcs were ruined for me by writing mistakes, problematic actresses, and lack of chemistry (which is admittedly subjective and something we all approach with shipper goggles to some degree--if you think you 100% absolutely don't you're lying to yourself). I stand by a lot of the reasons Buddies were so opposed to those li being endgame. Yes, plenty of us took things waaaaaaay over the line re: direct personal attacks against actresses and/or non-buddie fans, but I think far more of us than not did argue in good faith and toward the right people. We just didn't stand out as much or get as much engagement because . . . well, toxic behavior is rewarded on sm with more clicks, shares, likes, quotes, etc. Attention seekers gonna seek.

As for why it's so hard to ship happily on sm: in my experience a handful of problematic or outright unhinged fans (on both sides) will go around stirring shit, provoking arguments, and soon the dog pile effect kicks in because everyone wants to defend their tribe. Arguments go in circles, spin off, get more and more petty, until most of "us" end up discussing amongst ourselves about how "they" are a bunch of [insert string of negative attributes here], which then in itself provokes a reaction from "them." Lather, rinse, repeat. Eventually way too many of "us" are hissing and snarling at "them" more often than theorizing about or celebrating our ship . . . the thing we enjoy . . . and it's really hard to detach from that cycle, especially when things get personal. I recommend total non-acknowledgement, but even I struggle to hold that line when I read something I think is terrible. I'm making an effort these days to just keep scrolling thru my feed until I hit something happy, and if there's a negative comment somewhere in the thread to give it ZERO engagement of any kind. Not. Easy.

Which brings me to where I am today. During my time in the Buddie fandom I assumed that for most of us the actual queer rep mattered more than any one ship. Hell, if Taylor had been the one to wake Buck up to his bisexuality--and admitted what she did to Bobby was wrong--they might have grown on me as an endgame couple. I've accepted "meh" endgame couples before as long as everything else on a show stayed solid. I also thought that Buck could never, ever look at anyone with bigger hearteyes than the way he looked at Eddie, but . . .

. . . Enter Tommy. As soon as they kissed, and in their albeit limited screentime afterward (thanks a lot shortened season!) I learned a lesson: there are different kinds of hearteyes. In my opinion Buck looks at Eddie with complete adoration and love, yes. Total hearteyes. But the way he looks at Tommy is . . . "Oh, that's what Buck looks like when he's absolutely smitten, that's how he acts, that's what a romantic crush looks like on Buck. Wow." It wasn't better or worse than his hearteyes or vibe with Eddie, just conspicuously different. It re-framed the way I see the Buckley-Diaz Family as well, and the way I read their chemistry. As I mentioned earlier chemistry is subjective, and once I actually had something queer to compare with Buddie's chemistry, I stopped rooting for romantic Buddie. I wouldn't exactly be furious if they went canon since I did spend all those years rooting for them and it would still be a high profile queer storyline, but I would rather see the Buckley-Diaz Family and Tevan coexist. I think they can, and I think it would be beautiful.

So here's where I stand with my preference and opinions today:

Falling in love doesn't mean everyone else in your life gets demoted. Feelings aren't like pie. Maddie doesn't love Buck any less since she fell in love with Chimney. Athena didn't love her daughter any less when her son came along. There's not a finite amount of love and you're serving out pieces of it. You can love more than one person with all your heart. And that's how I feel about Buck and the Buckley-Diaz Family. He and Eddie are more than friends, different than brothers, they just . . . have their own dynamic. It's unique, special, and vital to both of their identities. And those facts will not be altered by either of them falling in love w/another person. If anything, the Buckley-Diaz Fam has become more special to me since I started rooting for a Tevan endgame.

Queer rep matters more to me than Buddie. Buck coming out as bi wasn't and shouldn't be seen as a step on the road to "winning" the ship I wanted for years. It is completely awesome progress for us whether they're endgame or not. Ditto for Tevan. Also, at the end of the day I ship Buck+Happiness and Eddie+Happiness, and right now Buck seems to be falling for Tommy. What happens with Eddie remains to be seen.

Looking at the whole picture, I will always love Buddie and kinda wish they'd gone canon in s4 or 5, but I think that moment has passed and I'm not mad or bitter about it. I adore the Buckley-Diaz Family, I adore Tevan, and I want to see them both thrive in s8. Now if you'll excuse me, my fingers have begun to bleed from all this typing.

[mingsolo]

awful summer nights

wonwoo x reader (f) / angst, romance, friends to lovers, smut / warnings: alcohol mentions, cursing, unprotected sex, that's it I think, pretty light / wc: 5k — r: 21+

For most people, the hot air of mid June, when the sun was high and its rays shone bright almost all day long, was certainly a blessing. 

Certainly not for you.

Exhausted, despite not having done much all morning, you stretch out. Laying on the fluffy rug in your room, the fan on maximum power makes your hair blow up in all directions. You wish nothing more than for the sun to go to the other side of the planet. Also, the heat is making your mind dizzier, not letting you think straight about what happened earlier in the day. You take your phone and see the text message again, as you have been doing all morning:

‘See you tonight, I have something for you.’

“Jeon Wonwoo, you idiot.” you curse under your breath. He had been away the past weeks, barely responding to your texts. He didn’t mention where he was going or what for, and you got angry at yourself for thinking he was obliged to tell you.

A new text interrupts your thoughts. Glancing over it quickly thinking it could be another message from Wonwoo you feel guilty for being slightly disappointed it’s from Yeri, your best friend, and the host for tonight’s party. 

“Come down! We're going shopping.” Yeri’s text it’s followed by a picture of her leaning against her brand new pink convertible’s door, flashing a full teeth smile and her fingers framing her small face. You scoff, texting her back that you’ll be there in a minute. With the little energy you have, you put on your shoes and leave the apartment.

“Well damn, look at this!” you say, passing Yeri by and hopping straight into the shiny pink car. You have seen pictures of it already, since she sent everyone at least fifty of them from all angles, but seeing it up close was obviously more impactful. “This is Barbie's car! everyone will be looking as you pass by on this thing” you raved, hopping in and feeling the leather seats against your bare legs. 

“That’s the point sweetie,” Yeri smiles, getting in the driver's side and putting on her sunglasses. You laugh with her, feeling the excitement to ride on her new toy, but while Yeri is busy fixing her hair on the front mirror before getting going, your mind wanders back to Wonwoo.

You are head over heels in love with him and you shouldn’t. That wasn’t the deal. 

.

.

.

At the mall, you continue to drag your feet, wiping away the sweat over your brows thanks to the open roof, letting all the sunrays land on the top of your head. Yeri on the other hand seems fresh as a daisy, coming in and out of all clothing stores, not quite finding what she is looking for. 

“Yeri, the party is today, I can’t believe you don’t have an outfit ready yet” you grunt, finally sitting on a bench inside one particular store, facing the summer sets on display. 

“Of course I have mine ready, I chose it like a month ago” she answers, picking out a dress from one of the racks. 

You arch your browns confused. “So we here on your birthday, looking for random outfits” 

“No silly, this outfit is not for me” she interrupts you with the biggest smile ever, holding against her body a baby blue crop spaghetti dress, adorned with white flowers. “It’s for you.”

“Huh?.” you shove away the dress as she hands it over for you to try it on. “I’m not wearing that.” you refuse, now being dragged to the changing room.

“Come on! a gift for me, you will look so pretty!” she pouts and nags, using her baby voice that annoys you as much as it makes you soft for her. “There’s no way you will show up at my party in a t-shirt and shorts” she huffs, arching her eyebrow knowing exactly that’s what you were planning on doing.

“I already bought you a gift you know, besides what’s wrong with shorts, it’s hot!”

“Yeah, and this dress is pretty, lightweight and short! So no excuses, try it on.” She pushes you behind the curtain of the dressing booth and waits for you. 

Defeated you do as told. Just because it's her birthday you can’t refuse letting her get away with this. And what is wrong with looking cute for once, if it’s to please your best friend on her special day? You tell yourself as Yeri hops behind you, you look in the mirror, surprised  and scandalized at how good you look with such a short skirt and prominent cleavage.

“Well take it!” She signs, getting out of the changing room with an ear to ear smile.

“Fine.” you sigh, not really mad about it at all.

.

.

.

Fuck this heat. 

You huff and puff, wiping away the drops of sweat from your forehead, again. You stand across the street from where the party is taking place, on the other side in full bloom. Music blasting loudly as far as two blocks away, hanging lights illuminating every window, from the first floor to the rooftop. You spot friends of Yeri and other familiar faces coming in and out of the main entrance, everyone seemingly enjoying themselves despite being under the humid weather. 

Pressing the gift against your chest, you breathe in and out again for the last time before walking towards the party. The other gift, your outfit— was awkwardly revealing, but it helped let the air ease the heat against your skin. 

As soon as you step in from the stone tiled floors of the entrance, you see it’s even more crowded with people than you could imagine. Seemingly half city was here and you got anxious just knowing you had to walk in the middle of all these people. You make your way between the sweaty skin of everyone you pass by, pushing your way to the stairs desperately wanting to reach the upstairs patio. 

The stairs are also fully crowded by people coming down or like you, wanting to go up to the second floor. You press yourself against the walls to let people pass you, avoiding as much as possible to come in contact with anybody. The sensation of others touching your exposed skin was a hard pass in your book.

When you finally reach the second floor, you walk straight to the big balcony. With a final shove you get to the patio doors and find with relief that there’s just a few people outside. Your eyes look for Yeri or another of your friends, desperate to find a familiar face. But definitely not that face. Just not yet. 

“Y/n!” The squeaky voice of an already tipsy Yeri greets you from the other side of the patio, coming towards you with open arms. “My god you look too good!” your friend says loudly, making you spin over your heels, modeling the perfectly crafted outfit for her. 

“You do look great Y/n, like a doll.” the voice of Dami, another of your good friends, reassures Yeri’s statement. 

“I told you Dami! She should let me dress her more often” Yeri smiles again, taking a drink from one of the waiters and handing it over to you. You roll your eyes and just let her praise you, or more so herself about how good you look.

As Yeri and Dami begin catching you up with who and what’s going on in the party so far, a shiver goes down your spine, feeling a familiar intense stare on the back of your neck. Instinctively you turn over your shoulder, spotting Wonwoo looking at you— and also a girl you didn’t know speaking enthusiastically to him, arm intertwined with his. You look away immediately, trying to catch up with what your friends were saying. 

“Stop, I’m not your barbie,” you shove Yeri’s hand off from pinching your cheek, and take a sip of your drink. With your free hand you put the gift on her hands. “Happy birthday again, here’s for another year keeping up with your shenanigans.” you say, kissing her cheek with a loud smack. 

Yeri squeaks and thanks you again, not before reassuring that the best gift is that you look so pretty today. You brush over her compliments, awkwardly trying not to spin thanks to the short length of your dress, but trying not to think much of it. You did look good after all, and it made you feel nice that people were noticing. 

“Y/n, you ok?” Dami asks with narrowed eyes. 

“I’m fine, is just the heat… it’s making me dizzy” 

“Y/n doesn’t stand the heat,” Yeri pouts, “Sorry for being born this time of the year.” She mimics crying, and you push her lightly. 

“I’m going to freshen up, walking between all the people made me kinda nauseous.” 

“Want help?.” Dami asks.

“I’m fine Dam, just wait for me here, please don’t get lost or I will never find you again.” 

You excuse yourself and walk towards the door, looking for the upstairs bathroom, glancing over Wonwoo quickly again— watching as he hasn’t shaken off the girl from his arm. You try not to mind it, getting away from the patio. As soon as you reach the bathroom you close the door behind you. 

Who could be that girl? And why is she clingling over him? You shake your head. You have no right to be thinking this way. You swore that you wouldn’t be that girl. Getting jealous over him, as if he was your boyfriend. When he is not. 

What Wonwoo and you had was a friendship, arranged with certain special terms, for those days when both of you were in need of a certain type of company. “Fuck buddies.”, Yeri concluded when you finally confessed to her that Wonwoo and you occasionally slept together without compromise. “Yeah, fuck buddies.” you sighed at the time, realizing that’s not what you really wanted. 

But it was too late now to tell him you needed more from him, that you wanted him to be yours only. He had told you when all of this started, that if someday one of you got serious with someone, that was it, no hard feelings or resentment. And you have agreed, that was the deal. Now that you thought he might find that someone to be serious with, it was more painful than you thought it would be. They’re just talking, you don’t even know if she’s with him, you tried to calm yourself, but it wasn’t working.

It's just that, you really were so afraid of losing him. These kinds of relationships never work out once someone backs up. The friendship won't be the same as it was, and it pained you that it couldn’t be more than that either.

After splashing water over your face and cleaning the sweat over your skin, you take the phone from your purse and look again at the message from this morning. ‘See you tonight, I have something for you.’ Maybe the text wasn’t even for you in the first place. Your chest tightens. Trying to forget about the whole thing, you decide to just  get a drink or two and leave, there were so many people that Yeri wouldn’t even notice anyway. 

Before getting out you decide to delete the message to avoid looking at it again and again, when three dots appear on the screen below it. Your eyes are wide open, glued to the screen. Waiting. 

.

.

.

Wonwoo’s eyes get fixated on your back as soon as you make your way to Yeri and Dami. God damn Yeri, I swear. The birthday girl smirks at him once she notices him watching. He would have to thank her later for having you come dressed like this, knowing she did it to get to his nerves intentionally. 

“Y/n doesn’t deserve to be anyone’s fuck bud, so you if you want her to be with you for real, better buckle up.” Yeri had practically threatened him over text when she knew about the arrangement between the two of you. Wonwoo wasn’t really mad that you told her about it, you were best friends and he knew Yeri could be very intuitive, and persuasive. “I know, I know…” Wonwoo texted her back. He wanted to be more than that to you as well, but he didn’t know how or when to tell you. “What if she doesn’t want this to change?” He asked.

“Tonight, tell her and find out.” Yeri then told him she was choosing your outfit for the party, letting him know he was completely ruined. And hell, he was.

He can’t avoid getting fuzzy at the sight of the very short skirt barely covering your ass. How the thin straps of your dress lay onto your collarbones and tiny drops of sweat covers your chest. A drop or two roll past your cleavage.

Well fuck me. He swears to himself, as you spin on your feet per Yeri’s request showing a little of what’s underneath your dress. He notices the people checking you up shamelessly and his blood boils with a possessive feeling that makes him groan slightly under his breath. Wonwoo shook his head. She’s not yours. He didn’t like it, thinking of you as a possession. Yet the thought was present so often lately.

By his side, Jeonghan is ranting about something loudly, making his already drunk sister laugh uncontrollably. She clings over his arm as she has done since he got up here, and tells him something he can’t really pay attention to. 

For a moment you glance over his direction, as just as quickly you look away. He gulps down the knot on his throat and wishes Jeonghan’s sister wasn’t tied up with his arm. She’s a nice girl but is so drunk already, so he tries to softly unlink their arms but she is not letting him, and he doesn’t want to shove her off just like that. Wonwoo shoots glances at Jeonghan trying to make him take the hint and take his sister away, but he is just as drunk or even more so, and even if he was sober he would make him suffer anyway.

His eyes are locked again on the back of your neck. Seeing how you sip on your drink cautiously. Then you give Yeri something and kiss her heartily. Wonwoo smiles. The love for your friends is always showing. He likes to think he is one of them. He knows he is, unless your situation changes that for you. He needed to ask, he needed to know. 

Just as he is about to politely shove Jeonghan's sister off and walk towards you, Wonwoo watches you tell something to Yeri and Dami and quickly sprinting off the patio, glancing over at him before disappearing inside. 

“Sorry, I gotta go.” He finally and firmly takes Jeonghan sister's arm off him and walks between people trying to reach you before you decide to leave for good. 

Wonwoo notices you entering the bathroom, closing the door behind you. He sighs relieved. At least he knows there’s only one way for you to get out there, so he’ll wait so you can go to a place without people, and talk. His right hand goes to the inside of his pocket, toying with the contents inside, for a moment he is hopeful.

About ten minutes later anxiety takes the best out of him. He thinks of calling you, but decides on texting you instead, hoping you decide to come out and talk to him.

“Are you alright? I’m outside.”

You read the message a few times not knowing what to respond to. Why?. Wasn't he accompanied now?. You type in a response, but keep deleting what you write over and over. If he’s outside the door, what's the point?. You sigh out loud, nerves and anticipation eating you alive. It’s better if you just come out and talk, he surely wants to tell you about the girl and settle things over. 

Yeah, it’s better to deal with this quickly.

As soon as you open the door you meet his eyes a few feet from where you stand. Wonwoo is leaning against the upstairs. A soft smile draws on his face when he sees you. You try to smile back normally but you only manage to make a weird grin that makes you want to throw yourself down the stairs.

“Hi,” he whispers with that low tone you know so well. “You look amazing.” He twitches trying not to look so much down over your outfit, or the lack of it. 

“Thanks, you too.” you mumble, heart thumping feeling Wonwoo’s dark eyes over your body, despite trying not to. 

“Are you alright?,” He asks again, sensing something is wrong because your eyes are kinda puffy and you can’t smile back like you always do. 

You breathe in softly, gaining courage. “Can we go downstairs, where there’s less people?.”  Wonwoo hums and nods in response, taking your hand and leading you through the sea of people down the stairs— trying not to let anyone touch you too much. Your heart beats so fast that is the only sound you can focus on, despite the loud music blasting in the house. Quickly, he finds an empty corridor, away from all the people at the party in the main halls. 

“What happened?,” He says first, back leaning onto the corridor walls. “I can tell you are upset.” 

“Uhm, it’s nothing.” 

He gets closer. “Your eyes are all big and shiny like when you cry or are about to.” 

He knew you too well. And it was making you feel worse about what you saw upstairs.  Just ask him. Get this over with. “Wonwoo, is there something you want to tell me about?.” 

Wonwoo seemed confused, watching you look away at him, your shoulders stiffening. “Is there something in particular that you want me to tell you?.” 

You sigh, getting frustrated.

“Is it about where I have been the past week?.” 

“No! Well, yeah, that too.” you frown, remembering he went away to God knows where for a week and didn’t tell you about it, you had to find out by texting him, receiving a “I'm out of town.” in response. “Who’s your friend from upstairs?”. 

Wonwoo sighs, a faint smile on his lips. 

“Just tell me. ” You swallow the lump in your throat. “Just tell me if this is it, I promise I won’t make things difficult for you.” 

Wonwoo leans forward, so close that it sends shivers down your spine. Then he makes you jolt as he wraps his hands around your waist, tugging his chin on the space between your neck and shoulder. “What are you doing?.” you say, not really moving or pushing him out. 

“She’s Jeonghan's sister ,” He tightens the grip around your waist, facing you again, “Why would I be here with anyone else if I told you I wanted to give you something tonight?” He couldn’t deny being amused that you were jealous over some girl he just met. But again, that’s the confirmation he needs to know that you want him as much as he wants you to be his only. 

You look at him confused and hurt, watery eyes about to burst out with tears. “What do you mean? you were hanging onto her.”

“Nuh-uh, she was hanging onto me,” He smiles, “You know Jeonghan can be an asshole if he wants to, and he just shoved her to me hoping she wouldn’t bother him too much.” Wonwoo felt bad talking of Jeonghan’s sister as if she was a thing, but the reality was that as soon as you entered the rooftop patio looking so radiant, he forgot the name she had given to him minutes prior. 

“I’m not jealous,” you press your hand over his chest, trying to push him off, but with so little strength he is not buying it. “I shouldn’t be, right? We are not together.” 

Wonwoo hums, slightly hurt from your words. But it was true, you were not yet together. 

“Come with me, this hallway is not where I want you to have what I got for you.” You frown, as Wonwoo takes your hand and leads you back between the sea of people until you both are outside by the back door of the house. 

You look up to the rooftop, spotting Yeri and the rest of your friends laughing vividly and having a great time. The rest of the people spreaded outside the house, drinking and talking, seem to pay no mind to you two.  Wonwoo passed between some bushes, leading to a stone tiled path to the back garden, two little guest bungalows at the back. Yellow lights inside of them.

Wonwoo takes out what seems like a key, and enters the one at the right side. You follow behind him, eyes wide open.

“How do you have a key for this?.” you ask him as he closes the door.

“I asked Yeri to get it for me.” 

“Huh?, Yeri?” you were confused asking yourself if your best friend was with Wonwoo on this scheme of making you feel jealous over Jeonghan’s supposed sister or what was happening. “Wonwoo!.” 

Wonwoo shushes you, which annoys a little, but you get distracted by him placing you in the seat of the couch inside the bungalow’s small living room, sitting in front of you. He then takes out a little black velvet box from his pocket, opening in front of you. 

You look at what’s inside, taking out a shiny silver necklace. Your favorite charm hanging on it. This was the same necklace you had as a child, that you lost on a trip overseas with your parents on your high school graduation. You remember telling Wonwoo on one of those nights in his apartment, lying beside him, how much you missed having it. Sadly it was custom handmade and the little jewelry store that made them had closed long before you had lost it.

Your mouth hangs open as you admire the form of the charm, identical as you remembered it. “Wonwoo… How did you find the exact one?.” 

“I know how much this charm means to you, so I looked out for the owner of the store,” He said, as he took the necklace and turned you over to put it across your neck. “I just described it to him in detail just as you told me, and he remembered exactly what it was, I just had to wait until he was done to come back.”

“Wonwoo!” you jumped out as he finished hooking the clasp of the necklace and hugged him tightly.

“I wanted to tell you something tonight,” Wonwoo buried his head on your neck again, brushing it with his lips softly. “You are the one for me, I don’t want anyone else.”

You close your eyes, letting his scent envelop you, both arms wrapped around his shoulders firmly. His lips brush against your skin as he speaks, you feel a shiver down your spine, letting his words sink into your mind. 

Wonwoo doesn’t need you to say you feel the same, cause he knows. He‘s pressed against you, and you could feel him. His love, his desire, his passion. But this time it's slightly different from the before, because he doesn’t rush things out, he stays still and lets himself be embraced by you. After a moment, you slowly break the hug and look him in the eyes, dark gaze glossy of adoration. And you know yours are the same. He leans and traces soft pecks over your shoulder blades. “I’m sorry I was away,” He lifted his head and pressed his forehead against yours. “I wanted it to be a surprise.”

You let out a sigh, feeling your chest tighten by realizing he had gone to get this for you, but with your heart blooming inside you started crying softly. You smiled and he did it too, eyeing your lips until he pulled you into a kiss. His hands slowly go down from your waist to the side of your legs, finding a path under your short skirt. 

“Wonwoo,” you hum against his lips. This was Yeri’s party after all and someone could come at any minute. 

“The little devil would kill me if I let you go right now, you think she gave me these keys just so we could talk?.” A lustful smile drawn on his lips, reading your mind. “The door is locked, and you must know how good you look in this outfit.” 

You put your hands on his chest, breaking apart from his face to ask him about what he just said. “Do you love me?.” 

Wonwoo paused his movements for a second, realization hitting him hard. Your pleading eyes about to cry out again, this time a different kind of tears waiting to roll down your cheeks. 

“I do love you,” He breathes, pushing himself against you. Hurried hands run along your waist and down the curves of your ass, his fingers playing with the waistband of your underwear. “I love you so fucking much.”

You then kiss him again, this time roughly, as he grabs you by your tights and lifts you until you wrap your legs around him. Without breaking the kiss he walks over the room at the back of the bungalow. Brownish curtains reflect the yellow light from inside. Wonwoo turns around and sits on the edge of the bed, placing you on his lap. You kept kissing him, hands messing his perfectly styled hair. He's going to undo his belt, and when that’s gone, his fingers are back on your clothed heat, brushing a finger along your already wet center. 

“Can’t believe you thought I could be interested in somebody else.” Wonwoo’s voice sounds huskier than usual, pride fueling his lust over your little jealousy. “No fucking way someone else make me look away from you.”

You buck your hips against his crotch, feeling the hardness of his length. You break the kiss and quickly remove Wonwoo’s shirt and throw it away. Knowing exactly what he wants to do, you lift your hips a little, giving him access to your center. Wonwoo brushes his fingers once more, palming you over you for a while, and easily sliding two fingers inside you. A moan, and then soft whimpers come from you as his fingers begin rubbing your clit. Both stop kissing, just looking at each other as he finger fucks you with a fast pace.  Your hips roll against his hand, and he can’t look away from how your eyes get heavy lidded, and you try hard not to close them. With his free hand Wonwoo pulls down the top of your dress, exposing your breasts and he begins kissing them. You throw your head back, the pleasure of his hot tongue rolling over your sensitive nibs and the noises he makes with his mouth as he bites and licks are driving you insane. 

Wonwoo’s fingers keep sliding in and out of you and the stimulation is almost bringing you to the edge, you only resisting the urge to come because you are desperate for him to fuck you properly. Again, he seems to read your mind because next thing he’s removing his fingers, making you whine by feeling the sudden emptiness. He stands up, moving you gently, even if he wants to be as rough as he can be.

Once he’s standing up, he bends you over the bed, putting you on hand and knees. He pulls your drenched panties down until they reach your feet and throws them away. He undo the buttons of his pants first and massages the curve of your ass for a second before aligning himself with your entrance. 

“This view.” He groans, licking his lips and caressing the side of your tights softly.

“Please Wonwoo,” you whine. the spiral in your lower stomach intensifies by his words. “Fuck me already.”Wonwoo chuckles, the tip of his dick already touching your clit. You whimper as he finally pushes himself inside you, his eyes shutting down by the sensation of your tight center receiving him so well. 

“Fuck, Y/n.” he groans, hands firmly pressing at the sides of your hips. You waste no time and, driven by desire, start rolling your hips rapidly. Wonwoo’s now thrusting inside and out at a fast pace that is making you both see stars and feel numb quickly. 

He bites his lip, trying not to be too loud, with every thrust. Every time he goes in and out of your squeezing pussy feels like it might make him come, but he holds on to dear life to keep on longer. He caresses the curve from your hips, your spine and shoulders, and his eyelids get heavy. The sound of your fast breathing combined with sweat beds rolling down from your back as he pounds in and out of you driving him crazy.  He then leans, chest pressing against your back. One of his arms slides under your breasts heading towards your clit, where he begins rubbing on your clit in motion circles. 

“Wonwoo.” you moan, the contact of his cold hand suddenly pressing on your heat making you shiver. “Hard. Fast, please…”

“Yeah?,” Wonwoo groans, pushing himself now harder and faster per your command. He listens attentively to every noise you make, as his fingers rub your clit, trying to keep the same pace. His chin is resting on your shoulder blades, and you lean to the side looking for even more contact. “Just say the words, love.”

He realizes you are looking for more of him and he leans, connecting his lips with yours. As you kiss messily and hurriedly, him going in and out, your soon release feels now even more intensely on your lower stomach. 

Your legs begin to shake, you know you won't last much longer if he continues to overstimulate every sensitive part of you. With a breathy moan you announce your high is crashing over you, and Wonwoo presses himself even more onto your skin. He tugs your hair instinctively, making you cry, and in that moment you come without warning, coating him entirely. Not much longer and he is done for as well. You can feel his load filling your walls up entirely.

“Oh… fuck” he mumbles, as he spills all inside you, still hugging you tight making sure nothing gets out. You collapse in the bed, and with the little strength he has, Wonwoo grabs you by the waist, falling down with you. 

He stays for a few moments on top of you, breathing heavily, moving aside when he has recovered control of his breath. You on the other side, stay chest pressed on the bed sheets, numb body unable to move an inch. 

“Let me clean you up,” Wonwoo’s raspy voice says as he gets up slowly and walks to the bathroom. You smile, eyes still closed, heart racing inside your chest. He comes back immediately after, and you roll over letting him take care of you. 

“You don’t have to,” you mumble, beginning to recover your breath. 

“I don’t see you putting up a fight,” He chuckles, cleaning the mess between your legs with a warm towel.  “Now that you are officially mine, you will get treated like a princess.” You reflect on his words. You don’t want anyone else to have him, and you are sure he is the only one you want, but Wonwoo has never struck you as the possessive type.  

Wonwoo folds the towel and puts it away, laying by your side, watching the dim lights of the built-in lamps on the ceiling. “A part of you is mine now, as much as a part of me is yours.” he whispers, caressing your face.

You press your body against him, wrapping your arm over his chest and kissing it softly. He hums and hugs you as well, both embracing the silence of the room a little longer, in contrast with the boisterous sounds of people partying just a few feet away.

[multi-fandom-imagine]

➤It is you || Rolan ||

A/n: Just a small drabble I've been thinking about for Rolan.*implied smut*

Takes place after the game

It was nice to be back in the very city you saved,plus spending so much time in Avernus with Wyll and Karlach was starting to take it's toll on you so you decided to part ways from the budding romance blooming between the two deciding to take some time to live a quiet life. You did your best to catch up with your former companions and exploring the city since you could actually enjoy it with out something happened but their was one place that was constantly on your mind, the one place that you wanted to visit was Sorcerous Sundries, the very place the held the very man that you had feelings for though you hated it took you this long to realize it.

Following the familiar path and through the very familiar portal you spotted the very Tiefling you were looking for. "You finally got a desk?"

Rolan, didn't notice you at first, the man was too absorbed in the old book he was reading, ond hand rubbing his temple as he concentrated on the paperwork that covered nearly every inch of his desk though it was your voice the broke his concentration as he finally looked up at you.

His eyes flashed with recognition, a flicker of amusement before it quickly turned into a scowl, something you were very familiar with seeing. "Oh... it's you again."voice was flat, still holding that arrogant tone. "What have I done to be honored with the presence of the Hero of Baldur's Gate? Tire of Avernus already."

An airy laugh escaped your lips as you tilted your head to the side. Still smiling you moved to sit on the edge of his desk. You did miss this, miss the banter that you two would often share back and forth.

"That's it? That's all the greeting I get? No hug? No! Oh how I missed you!."

The tiefling scoffed and rolled his eyes as you sat on his desk, causing papers to flutter around. He set aside the book then looked at you. As a smirk formed on his lips as he leant back in his seat. "Well, well, look who finally decided to grace me with their presence! Though I’ll have you know, that I am a very busy man and don’t have time for your whimsical greetings." His expression turned to a pout “But I suppose the feeling is mutual, especially after you saved my life more times than I care to count..."

You barked out a laugh, shaking your head for a moment. You were happy that he was still himself,you weren't quite sure what you would do if the man had changed.

"You look good Rolan....happier now."

The tiefling's gaze lingered on you, his eyes traced the outline of your figure, the soft curves that had filled out.But despite these changes, there was something captivating about you. There always had been.

A smile tugged at the corner of Rolan's lips. "Happier?" He repeated, his voice soft, almost a whisper. He leaned forward, resting his hands on his desk "How do you know my happiness is not an act?"

Letting out a scoff, you still had a smile on your lips as you lent into closer to the man, your eyes sparkling. "You have a twinkle in your eye... that can't be an act Rolan."

It was nice seeing him like this, happier. He and his siblings went through so much."But if it is then maybe you should think about switching careers."

A soft chuckle escaped Rolan’s lips as the corners of his mouth formed into a small smile. He reached out and gently traced his warm fingertips across your cheek. "Ah, I knew you would see right through me, my clever friend. My smile is real, I can assure you."

His fingers lingered on your skin for a moment before he gently retracted his hand. You could faintly see a hint of rosiness on the tiefling's cheeks "You are right though, I am happier now that the Sword Coast is no longer in danger of extinction."

Letting your eyes slip closed, you did your best to ignore the shiver running down your spine from how good it felt from when he touched you. You were embarrassed by how much you hated from when he pulled away.

You enjoyed how warm his touch felt on your skin and you did your best to try not to imagine those fingers gliding else were across your body.

"Thats good, you and your siblings deserve it, after all that has happened."

Rolan felt the shift in you, the way your body responded to his touch. He saw your eyes flutter shut, the shiver that ran down your spine, the subtle hints that you did not want him to pull away. It was all too familiar to the tiefling, a feeling he had tried so hard to ignore.

His golden eyes widened slightly before a hint of mischievousness lit up his visage and played upon his lips. "Is that a hint of desire I see before me? Or am I merely imagining things?" He leaned forward, his voice a whisper of a tease.

You sucked in a breath as your cheeks dusted with pink. "I haven't the foggiest idea on what you're talking about." You muttered, a small pout on your lips.

You couldn't believe that you were caught, you were usually so good at hiding yourself

His smirk widened as he observed your flushed cheeks, that beautiful hue of pink that spread across them. Rolan reached out and brushed his fingers against your cheek, feeling the heat radiating from them.

“Oh, don’t give me that innocent look." The tiefling chuckled, leaning in closer. “I've seen the way you look at me." His voice lowered to a seductive purr as his thumb traced the contour of your lips. “I’ve felt the way your body quivers under my touch…”

Letting your eyes slip closed again, a breathy sigh left your lips as you tried to not arch into his touch though you gave him a crooked smile as another small jolt of pleasure hit you from his voice alone.

"And do you feel the same way Rolan?"

A low chuckle reverberated in Rolan's chest, a sound that sent a shiver down your spine. He moved even closer, closing the distance between them, his golden eyes gleaming with a fiery intensity, a mixture of passion and anticipation.

"Do I feel the same way?" He repeated, his voice laced with desire. "You have no idea how much I've longed to touch you…taste you...devour you completely."

Shifting your spot on the desk, you could feel your heart hammering in your chest. You didn't know how much you longed to hear those words spill from his lips.

"Well what's stopping you Rolan?"

Rolan's eyes darkened with desire as he took in your words. Lust. Affection. He needed you.

"Absolutely nothing."

With a swift and fluid motion, Rolan stood up from his seat, his hands grasping your hips and pulling you closer. He pulled you against his body, his slender frame pressing against yours.

"Gods, you don't know how hard it's been, not being able to touch you this entire time." His lips sought yours, capturing them in a hungry kiss.

Melting into the kiss, you let your eyes slip closed. Your fingers clutching his cloak tightly, you wanted this too, for so long, you didn't want it to end. Your body and mind were craving more, more of him, more of this.

Rolan's tongue danced and tangled with yours, his touch possessive yet gentle. His hands roamed your body, caressing, exploring every contour and curve, desperate to feel more of you.

He deepened the kiss, tilting your head back slightly to delve deeper, to claim you completely. His slender frame pressed further against you, pinning you to the table as his hips grinded gently against yours. A low groan escaped from deep within his throat.

You felt a moan escape your lips as you pressed more into him. Your hips grinding back as your nails dug deep into his shoulders. Your body felt hot, it tingled with desire, desperate as you rubbed yourself into him craving more.

Rolan growled low in his throat as you rocked your hips against his, the friction driving his body wild with desire. His hands grasped your thighs, gripping the supple flesh before slowly sliding up to your rear, cupping your backside.

The tiefling broke from the kiss and pressed his face into your neck, his hot breath tickling your skin. His lips claimed your flesh, showering your collarbone with hungry kisses and love bites.

Arching your neck out, you let your hands drift to his back as your legs wrapped around his hips instinctively rutting into him. Your heart was pounding wildly in your chest, his name spilling from your lips.

A low groan rumbled in Rolan's chest as your legs wrapped around him, trapping him in place. His hips rocked against you, matching your rhythm. The friction sent a wave of pleasure through his body, intensifying his desires.

He pressed his lips to the crook of your neck, his tongue teasing the sensitive skin there. His breath came in hot puffs against your skin as he whispered your name, his voice hoarse with need. "... Gods, you drive me mad, my love."

Doing your best to catch your breath, you looked up at him with wide eyes. Lips swollen as you placed a kiss against his jaw nipping at the skin.

"Please take me Rolan, I need you."

Rolan's breath hitched at the sound of your desperate plea. A low growl rumbled deep in his throat as he tightened his grip on your hips, pulling you closer to him.

"With pleasure, my dear." His voice was a whisper in your ear, laden with a heady mix of desire and need. The tiefling knocked the rest of his papers off his desk as he pushed you down on to the desk. "I can not wait for you to shout my name, be as loud as you want my dear...know one will hear you." He whispered against your neck.

[scarletvanfleet]

Jake makes up his mind about something life changing for the both of you.

Pairings: Jake Kiszka x Reader

Word count: 3.8k ish

Read on A03!

Warnings: P in V Sex, Breeding Kink, Pregnancy Kink, Vaginal Sex, Oral Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Cum Swapping & Cum Play (mild).

18+ ONLY MINORS GO AWAY!

Thank you to my besties for supporting me with this fic. I've wanted to write it for so long.

Jake was always so meticulous with his planning, though he was almost never on time for anything. He knew he needed to be on time for this though, so he sat down with his phone in hand and began to document the last period he remembered you having. He remembered it being a particularly difficult one for you and how you'd begged him for some relief from it. How you had said you would give anything to have some extended relief from the monthly horror. He was surprised that when he googled how far out the ovulation window was, that today was falling in the first 24-48 hours of your fertility window. He smiled to himself and closed out of the app on his phone.

It was time to get to work.

~

You had mentioned to him before how much you wanted kids and were ready for them. Your subtle (or not so subtle) hints seemingly falling on deaf ears. He had somewhat brushed it off and you took that as him just not being ready. So you just didn't bring it up again.

When you walked into the house that evening you could tell something was up. The house was completely spotless and smelled wonderful. The lights were turned down low and there was a vase of beautiful red roses waiting for you on the counter. You smiled and wondered what he was up to. But before you could even put your keys down, he was up behind you pressing kisses to your neck and rubbing his palms over your lower stomach and hips.

"Well hello to you too" you said, a light giggle coming out of your mouth.

"Hello my love." He whispered into your ear before kissing the shell and taking your lobe between his teeth and suckling on it. You felt the rush of warmth between your legs as he sucked.

"What's gotten into you today?" You ask as you turn in his arms to face him.

"Well, I've just been thinking." He says, looking down into your beautiful eyes.

"Oh yeah? About what?" You smile as you take one of the three buttons that are done up on his shirt into your fingers and begin pulling them apart.

"About you." He says simply, reaching up to stroke your cheekbone.

"Me? What about me?" You inquire further.

"Why don't we take this to our room and I can do a little show and tell for you" He whispers and then rubs his nose up the bridge of your own before kissing you lightly on the lips.

You nod and he releases you from his arms. You turn and walk down the hallway to your shared room and gasp at the beautiful candle lit room with more bouquets of roses and some petals strewn across the bed spread. You giggle a little at the classic display of romance and you just know this is no regular session of making love with Jake. Something is definitely up. He’s never done something like this before.

"Jake?" You ask as you sense his presence behind you.

"Yeah babe?" He responds, reaching out to grab your hips again.

"You gonna tell me what's going on?"

"Why don't we get you a little more comfortable and I can tell you while I undress you?" He says, already reaching around for the button of your pants.

"Hmm.. Okay." You smirk as he begins to work at the button before it pops open and he slides the zipper down. Soon his hands are back at your hips and pushing the fabric down your legs. He gets them to the floor before helping you step out of them completely. He then stands and pulls your shirt off over your head.

"So fucking pretty for me." He says as he eyes your matching set, which you're not glad you'd slipped on this morning even though you had no idea this was coming. "Tell me baby. How have you been feeling today?" He asks as he looks down at you.

"Fine, why?" You respond. Looking at him curiously.

"Not feeling moody, or crampy. Maybe a little sore in the chest?" He inquires, running his fingers over your chest and stomach.

You thought back on your day and remembered the light cramping you felt along with being just a little more snappy than usual. You'd chalked it up to hormones and pushed it aside in your mind.

"Hmm. Maybe a little crampy and kinda moody I guess." You shrugged. Wondering where this conversation was going as he continued to trace shapes into your skin.

"I see. You look a little flushed too. Have you been like that all day?" He asked and your brow furrowed.

"I guess? Jake, are you going to tell me what this is all about?" Your curiosity was killing you at this point and this line of questioning was driving you nuts.

"Well honey. I was thinking… and I believe I'm ready now." He responded. Leaning forward to kiss your forehead.

"Ready for what Jake?" You asked, your brows knitting together.

"I'm ready to put a baby in you." He said simply. Looking deep into your eyes.

Shock washed over your body immediately and your eyes went wide in realization.

"Wh... What?" You blinked.

"You heard me. It's time. If that's something you still want, that is." He seemed nervous now, concerned that you might reject the offer.

"Fuck Jake. Of course it is." You confirmed, reaching out to grab him by the collar of his shirt and pull him in close for a deep kiss. He grabbed the sides of your face and pulled you in closer as he ran the tip of his tongue across your bottom lip, begging for entry which you granted quickly.

The kiss heated up rather fast and before you could control it, your hands were at his belt, pulling it open and then diving for the button below. You popped it open and unzipped his jeans before sliding them down along with his boxers.

He broke from the kiss momentarily to pull his shirt the rest of the way from his body and throw it to the floor.

You noticed the flush across his cheeks and collar bone. Something that normally only happened when he was nervous. It was then that you also noticed the slight shake in his hands.

"Baby, are you nervous?" You ask, taking his hand in yours and bringing it to your lips.

"Yeah a little.” he confirmed.

" It's just me, baby. No need to be nervous."* You tell him. Kissing him on the lips once more.

" I know it's just..." He cut himself off

"Just what?" You pushed.

"You're ovulating. This could really happen tonight. " He smiles, placing one hand over your womb.

"Is that what all those questions were about?" You giggle.

"Yeah. I've kind of tracked your cycle." He confesses.

Your heart races at the words. He'd planned this.

"You really want this?" You ask quietly.

"More than anything. " He responds.

You smile and push him backwards towards the bed, and then encourage him to get on top of it.

"I want to spoil you." He says as he ignores your encouragement. He pats the bed gently and you laugh but do as he's instructing.

You crawl into the middle of the bed amongst the rose petals and lay down on your back.

"So perfect." He says as he joins you and begins rubbing circles into your thighs.

"So a baby huh?" You ask as you reach down to pull him up next to you so you can kiss him.

"Please?" He begs as he leans himself down to press a kiss first to your sternum and then lower until he is hovering over your belly.

"You don't have to beg baby. I'll give you what you want. You know I will." You run your hand through his hair.

He smiles and places another kiss even lower and continues until he is hovering over your clothed core. He places one more kiss to the center and begins peeling down your underwear. He does so slowly before flinging them across the room with a smile.

He settles back down between your legs and lays his tongue flat to lick up your slit. You shudder at the feeling of him as he completes that pattern a couple more times before licking back up and circling around your clit. He continues to circle it before taking it completely into his mouth and sucking gently. You gasp and you can feel the shake of his shoulders as he giggles. He releases the bud from his mouth and then uses his pointed tongue to quickly kitten lick at it. He moves it so quickly it feels like he's using a vibe on you and you can feel your toes curling at the sensation.

"Fuck, Jake" you breathe, feeling your wetness begin to leak out onto the bed. You can feel him smile before he's reaching around your legs and pulling them open wider. He glances up at you once, his hungry eyes full of lust, and he's flattening out his tongue again and thrashing his head side to side against you. You moan loudly at the feeling and reach down to grab at his hair. He grunts as your fist clenches and then you hear him growl. He moves his arms and grabs you by the backs of your thighs and forces your legs back. He instructs you to hold them up by the backs of your knees and makes his way back down to your dripping heat.

This time he licks against your entrance and then plunges his tongue in as deep as he can. He begins to fuck you with his tongue rapidly and then reaches a hand up to rub circles into your clit with his thumb. You feel yourself clench around the muscle as the warmth in your belly begins to spread and intensify. You cry out his name as he continues to fuck you with his tongue and soon you can sense the incoming orgasm as it begins to turn itself into a knot in your tummy. But it's not enough. You need more.

"Fuck Jake, more. More please." You beg and he retracts his tongue and quickly replaces it with his middle and ring finger, fucking them into you and curling them into your g-spot. The slight sting of the sudden intrusion of two digits thrusts you closer to the edge and you're teetering right there. So close. He can tell by the way you're fluttering around his fingers that you're close, so he continues working his fingers in and then leans down to suction your clit in his lips again. It tastes mere seconds and you're coming down around him, feeling the gush of your orgasm as it soaks his fingers. Your breathing is wild as he works you through it

He's smiling widely as he withdraws his soaked fingers from you, only to pop them in his mouth and revel in your taste once more.

"Fuck you taste so good baby." He says once they're sufficiently clean. "Are you ready or would you like a break?" He asks gently, stroking your thighs as they come to rest on either side of him.

You can see now how hard he is, his cock standing at attention and precum making a mess of the tip. You suddenly feel a rush of anxiety as you realize you've never taken him like this. He picks up on the change immediately and leans forward to kiss your forehead.

"Is everything okay baby? Did you change your mind?" He asks as he tries to calm you.

"No. No. I want this. I'm okay. I just.. We've never... Without a condom." You explain.

He smiles and places another kiss on your forehead. "It's gonna be okay love. We can go slow. It's going to be different for me too."

You nod and wrap your arms around his neck to pull him down on top of you. His body adds the needed pressure to calm your anxiety and you begin to push your hips up against his and rut his cock against your bare slit. He lets out a whine as he feels your slick warmth under him for the first time.

He then begins to grind against you, adding some much needed pressure to the equation. "You feel so good already." He huffs.

"So do you. Fuck baby. I need to feel you against me. Take this thing off of me." You say as you begin to grab at the straps of your bra. He smiles and says "Of course" before reaching under you and releasing the clasp. He then pulls the material off of you leaving you completely bare.

He traces a nipple with his finger and waits until it hardens before doing the same to the other. He then kitten licks at the bud before taking it into his mouth and sucking on it. He hums around your nipple and then pops off after a few minutes.

"Fuck baby." He says, examining your breasts. "I can't wait until you're pregnant and these get even bigger and so full of milk.”

He sighs as he continues to admire them. You whimper and press your hips back up against him, causing him to slide through your wetness once more.

"I'm ready Jake. Please." You tell him, raking your hands through his hair again.

He smiles and kisses you before reaching down to line himself up. He slips in easily and you can feel yourself clench up around him as you feel him bare for the first time. "Fuck Jake, Fuck. You feel so good. Keep going please." You encourage as he had stalled after just the tip to take some deep breaths of his own.

"Okay. Okay. " He nods and shifts his hips forward until they're flush against yours. You sigh in relief as you feel so full of him, his naked heat within your own.

"C-Can I move?" He asks hesitantly. Wanting to give you enough time to fully adjust.

"Please? I want it so bad." You tell him. Wriggling underneath him slightly.

He nods and begins to pull out to the tip before sliding back in. He presses hard against you when he's fully sheathed, nudging his tip right against your cervix and making you gasp.

He smiles and repeats the action before starting up a rhythm. Its slow and steady as you realize he isn't going to be fucking you this evening. He's making slow, sweet love to you in a way that was so different from any other time before.

You look up into his beautiful dark chocolate colored eyes and whisper "I love you". He smiles and says it back.

You love the feeling of him sliding into you and you can feel as the pleasure begins to rise within you, threatening to come down against him at any moment. "I'm gonna cum Jake. I want you to cum with me."

"Fuck okay." He says as he begins to pick up his pace. You can feel when his hips begin to stutter out of rhythm. "Cum for me baby." He says, reaching down to place a hand over your womb again and you can feel him moving within you with the added pressure.

White noise begins to fill your ears as your orgasm begins to crest and you feel your back arching up off the bed. He reaches down with his hand that isn't holding your womb and squeezes your hip tight as he pushes in deeply until he’s right against your cervix again. You feel the warmth of his cum as it coats you and makes you shiver. He continues to push his cum into you until he physically cannot anymore and he's whispering to you "That's it. That's it. Take it all. Take it and make me a baby my love."

You watch his face as he looks down at you, so full of love with his cheeks flushed so beautifully.

"I will. I will. I promise." You tell him and he lights up with the most gorgeous smile.

"I know. I believe in you." He responds before carefully slipping out.

He looks down to where he had just been connected with you, and sees a small amount of creamy leakage from where he pulled out. He quickly takes two fingers and swipes through it before pushing it back into your entrance.

"Gotta keep it all in baby. Can't waste a single drop." He smiles and then pulls his fingers out, only to again pop them into his mouth to clean off.

His eyes roll back at the combined taste. "We taste so good together, my sweet." He says before leaning down to kiss you. You're eager for a taste so you lick into his mouth and suck on his tongue. You hum at the salty sweet taste.

"We do.” you agree.

He smiles again and gets off of the bed to retrieve a towel from the bathroom and comes back to gently wipe you down.

"You did so well." He praises as he leans down to kiss your belly again. "My baby is going to be in there soon. I just know it."

 

And he was right.

 

It was a mere four weeks after that night that you started feeling a heaviness in your chest, and when you brought a hand to your breasts you could feel the tenderness. At first you thought maybe it was period symptoms and ignored it. But when you checked your app you noticed your on time cycle was late by a couple of days. A shock ran through your body as you sat with your phone in hand, examining the calendar for the fifth time. Finally you swallowed hard and got up to grab your keys from the table. Jake wasn’t home yet so you didn’t have to worry about him inquiring as to where you were going. You slid into your car and headed for the pharmacy down the street.

As soon as you were inside you were overwhelmed with the options of tests available to you. You looked them all over before choosing the most recognizable brand with a digital screen and early detection. You didn’t want to do any guess work. As you turned around from the tests, you saw the wall of baby supplies. Your heart leapt in your chest as you thought over the possibility. You hurried to check out and bought the test before heading back to your home.

Jake was still not home and you debated waiting until he was. You turned the thought over in your mind as you unlocked the door and went inside. You set the test on the island and went to your room to put your shoes away and take off your annoying bra as it compressed your breasts uncomfortably.

As you were in your room you heard the front door open and Jake stepped into the house. Your anxiety peaked as you heard him walk towards the kitchen and stop abruptly. You could hear the rustle of the bag from the pharmacy as his curiosity got the best of him.

“Babe?” He called out into the house.

“Uh…Yeah? I’m in the bedroom.” You yelled out to him.

You could hear the click of his boots against the wood floor as he walked down the hall and into the room.

“Babe.” He said again, causing you to turn around and look at him as he held the box of tests in his hands. “You think you’re pregnant?” He asked cautiously.

“I mean… Yeah…Maybe.” You said coyly.

He took a deep breath and you saw his eyes well with tears. “Baby. Why didn't you tell me?" He asked as he stepped forward to scoop you into his arms.

“I…I just noticed the soreness this morning, and I-I'm a couple days late.” You explained as he kissed your cheeks.

"You should definitely take this then. Do you want to do it now?” He asked, looking into your eyes.

"I can, yeah. Uhm.. Stay here. I'll go do it and we can wait together. Okay?” You asked him.

"Yes, definitely.” He smiled and released you from his hold and gave you the box.

You nodded and walked to your bathroom and shut the door. You read the instructions just to be safe, and then took the test. You capped the test and placed it face down on the sink as you finished up and went to wash your hands.

You opened the door to the bathroom and found Jake sitting on the bed waiting nervously, biting at the cuticle of his finger.

“About 3 more minutes and we can look. Are you okay?" You ask him.

"Yeah I'm just nervous. I kind of didn't expect it to happen so quickly. Even though I'm excited too.” He smiled, reaching out to you. You stepped into his grasp and he pulled you in tight to his chest. You flinched at the pressure against your chest causing a sharp pain.

“Ow" you said, pulling away slightly.

“I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean to hurt you. Are you okay?" He asked, his brows tinting with concern.

“I'm okay. Just my boobs are really sore." You whined, raising your hands to them and gently massaging. He smiled at you and you raised a brow. “What Jake?” You asked.

" I just can't wait to see how big they get.” He giggles.

" Oh you dog. Come on, let's check this thing.” You grabbed his hand and you both walked to the sink. " You do it.” You tell him, squeezing his hand gently.

He nods and grabs the test off the sink and lifts it up so he can read it.

Pregnant

“Thank you baby." He kisses your lips gently and continues to hold you a while longer.

He gasps and drops the test into the basin before grabbing you up into another tight hug.

“You're pregnant… You're going to have my baby.” He says quietly and you feel a slight wetness on your face. You look up and see tears trailing from his eyes and falling onto his cheeks.

" Oh my love. You're crying?” You ask, concerned about his reaction as he normally never cries.

" I'm just so happy. I'm going to be a Dad.” He chuckles and reaches a hand down to cover your stomach. "Our baby is in there. Right now. I just-” he sobs and fresh tears cascade over his face.

"Oh Jake. You're going to be the best Dad.” You tell him, squeezing him tightly around the waist.

Fin.

[sturnioloisland]

Happier | M.S.

Hello everyone :) this is very much my first time posting on tumblr, and I quite literally have no clue what I am doing.

I’m also making this post from my phone, so if it’s messed up just ignore it. Let me know if y’all like this or hate it. Either one is fine.

Pairing: Matt x Fem!Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: I posted something similar to this on ao3 many a years ago when I was part of a different fandom.

Matt walked down the sidewalk heading towards his favorite coffee shop he used to frequently visit. Within the last month, he seemed to be living in a constant nightmare. He’d wake up everyday alone without her body next to him. He no longer got to see that warm and beautiful smile first thing when he woke up.

Every night was a battle to fall asleep and every morning was a struggle to get out of bed. He regretted his decision, and if he could take back everything he said, he would in a heartbeat. It was just a stupid fight because of his own insecurities. 

Matt remembers the look on her face after he spewed those hateful words. He remembers the tears in her eyes when he said he didn’t love her anymore. He didn’t mean to say it, but he did, and he struggles living with the consequences of his words.

The cold wind nipped at his nose as he approached the coffee shop. It had been a while since Matt had been there. This was the place where they had their first few dates. Melancholy was set deep in his heart, and he couldn’t shake that feeling away. What he would do to go back in time and change the happenings of that night.

He finally reached the shop and quickly entered, the warmth inside immediately thawing his shivering limbs. Matt was always cold, but the girl he once loved - still loved - was always warm, and Matt used to always melt into her embrace.

The line was rather short with only a few people in front of him. Matt already had his order in mind. It was the same thing he got every time. Soon enough he reached the register, immediately recognizing the barista as someone who used to work all the time when he came in with her.

“Hey,” He said with a warm smile, “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you in here. You used to come in all the time.”

Matt smiled timidly and gazed down at his feet. “Yeah, yeah it has been a while, but I plan on coming back more. I sure do miss the muffins you guys sell here.” 

The barista chuckled, “So I take it that you’ll be having your usual order then?”

Matt nodded.

“Okay, I’ll get right to it. It was good to see you again. You disappeared for a few months, so I hope you’re doing well.”

Matt once again flashed him a fake smile, “It was good to see you too.” He finished paying for his order and stepped to the side - secretly grateful he wasn’t asked about why he was there without her.

He messed around on his phone looking through messages from friends who were still checking up on him. He felt guilty for never responding to them, but he didn’t know how. All of them asked how he was or if he was okay or even if he needed anything from them. The one thing he wanted was something that they couldn’t give him.

He scrolled through his camera roll looking at old pictures, the guilt slowly creeping back into him as he looked at the old photos he never bothered to delete. Matt felt that familiar burning sensation behind his eyes and quickly closed the camera roll on his phone. He wouldn’t cry in public. No, he wouldn’t cry at all. He’s done too much of that.

“Matt?” A barista called out as his order was finished. He walked to the counter, grabbed his coffee and warm muffin and thanked the barista before turning to head out, pausing only to grab a few napkins.

On the way out, he saw a familiar head of hair that was styled in a way that he remembered seeing it. He stopped dead in his tracks as he came to realize who it was. The girl whose heart he shattered into a million pieces was standing in line just about four feet away from him. 

She looked as beautiful as San remembered her being. Her beautiful eyes, the small mole under them, her hair, and most importantly her smile. She was smiling brightly, and Matt felt the glass around his heart shatter because she wasn’t alone. No, she was holding hands with another man. A man that wasn’t him.

Matt was staring and he was sure the girl felt his eyes burning into her, for when the latter turned her head to face Matt, that enchanting smile faltered. They both stared at each other, both in disbelief of seeing the other. It was she who broke the silence between them.

“Hi Matt.” Her tone was bitter, and Matt didn’t blame her at all. He broke her heart into a million pieces and left verbal wounds that he knew he could never take back no matter how much he wanted to. He broke the girl’s heart, and Matt was in disbelief that she even acknowledged him.

He hesitated. He hadn’t said her name in so long, and he was trying not to choke on his words. It was a name he used to say full of love and passion. A name that was now just reduced to a memory of something good he once had, something good that he ruined. “Hi y/n.”

A/n again: sorry if this sucks. It was quite literally the one and only thing I have ever written.