#but i like the deeper meaning you know about his inner conflict

[dazaistabletop]

*spoilers*

Tachihara has his back turned in the intro.

This is so important

[tsumuus]

sometimes the person you fall for isn’t ready to catch you

The weight of your feelings for Shoto Todoroki had always been a silent burden, one you carried with careful deliberation. You’d known him for years, watched him grow from the reserved, conflicted teen in UA into the poised and powerful Pro Hero he was today. Through it all, your friendship remained constant, a steady foundation you both relied on, even when the world around you was chaotic.

But somewhere along the way, things changed. Your heart started to race when he was near, your thoughts lingered on his gentle, thoughtful words, and the space between you felt charged with something unspoken. You weren’t sure when admiration turned into affection or when that affection grew into something deeper, but you were sure of one thing- you had fallen for Shoto Todoroki.

And it was terrifying.

The feelings you harbored were a fragile thing, a delicate balance of hope and fear. You didn’t want to lose what you had with him, the bond you’d nurtured for so long. But the more time you spent with him, the more your heart ached with the need to tell him, to lay it all bare and hope against hope that he might feel the same.

But Shoto Todoroki wasn’t known for catching people. He wasn’t known for diving into emotions or revealing the deep inner workings of his heart. He was quiet, reserved, and careful with his affections. And you were afraid that if you confessed, you’d be left in that silence, caught in the cold of his uncertainty if he didn’t feel the same.

It was late one evening when you found yourself sitting beside him on the rooftop of his agency, the city lights glittering below like a sea of stars. Shoto had always liked it up here, the quiet that contrasted with the chaos of his daily life. It was one of the rare moments when you saw him at ease, his usual composed expression softened into something more contemplative.

“You’re quiet,” he remarked, glancing at you from the corner of his eye. His voice was calm, but there was a subtle concern in it that only someone who knew him well would notice.

You forced a smile, trying to push away the thoughts that had been plaguing you all night. “Just thinking.”

“About what?” he asked, turning his gaze fully on you, the intensity of his mismatched eyes making it even harder to breathe.

You hesitated, your heart pounding in your chest. The words were on the tip of your tongue, desperate to escape, but they clung there, weighed down by the fear of what could come next.

“I… I’ve been meaning to tell you something,” you began, your voice shaky despite your efforts to keep it steady. You could feel his eyes on you, his focus unwavering, and it made the confession that much harder. “It’s just… I’ve been feeling this way for a while, and I don’t think I can keep it to myself anymore.”

Shoto’s expression didn’t change, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes- surprise, maybe, or concern. “What are you trying to say?”

You swallowed hard, the words finally spilling out in a rush before you could stop yourself. “I like you, Shoto. More than just a friend. I’ve liked you for a long time now, and I just… I needed to tell you.”

Silence. The air between you seemed to freeze, your heart pounding so loudly in your chest that you could barely hear anything else. Shoto’s expression remained calm, almost too calm, his eyes searching yours as if he was trying to find the right response.

“yn, I…”

Your heart sank at the hesitation in his voice, at the way he seemed to struggle with his words. Shoto wasn’t one to speak his emotions easily, and you could see the conflict in his eyes, the way he was trying to find the right words, the right way to let you down gently.

“I don’t know what to say,” he finally admitted, his voice soft but heavy with the weight of his uncertainty. “I care about you, yn. You’re important to me, more than you know. But… I’m not sure if I can return those feelings. Not in the way you deserve.”

The weight of his words settled in your chest, heavy and suffocating. You had known, deep down, that this was a possibility, but it didn’t make it any easier to hear. It didn’t stop the ache that spread through you, the hollow feeling of rejection that gnawed at your heart.

“It’s okay,” you whispered, though it was anything but. “I understand.”

Shoto’s eyes softened, and there was a deep sadness in them, a regret that he couldn’t express more clearly. He reached out, his hand hovering just above yours before he pulled back, as if unsure whether he had the right to cross that line.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he said quietly, his voice laced with a sorrow that made your chest tighten. “You mean a lot to me, yn. But I’m still trying to figure things out. I don’t want to rush into something and end up hurting you more in the end.”

You nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I appreciate that, Shoto. I do. I just… I just needed to tell you.”

Shoto’s gaze remained on you, his eyes filled with a mix of emotions you couldn’t fully decipher. “Please don’t distance yourself,” he said, his voice almost pleading. “I don’t want to lose what we have.”

You offered him a small, sad smile, trying to push away the tears that threatened to fall. “I’m not going anywhere, Shoto. I promise.”

But as you sat there beside him, the space between you feeling wider than ever, you couldn’t help but wonder if that promise was one you could keep. Because while you were willing to wait, to be patient, you weren’t sure how long you could bear the weight of unrequited feelings, how long you could keep pretending that everything was okay when it wasn’t.

Sometimes, the person you fall for isn’t ready to catch you. And as much as it hurt, you knew that Shoto Todoroki wasn’t ready to catch you. Not yet.

masterlist

a/n i have to wake up in less than 5 hours bc i have senior sunrise, and instead of going to sleep as soon as i finished my hw i sat down and wrote this🤗 yw ig<3333 or not bc this is angsty lol i will make up for it soon

[superprofesh]

The Five Times Colt Seavers Almost Kisses You (and the One Time He Does) — Part 4

Pairing: Colt Seavers x reader

Description: The fourth time Colt Seavers almost kisses you — on the brink of a promise he knows he can't afford to make.

Rating: T

Word Count: 3.2k

Tag List: @strangedeerconnoisseur, @icantwaittoliveandlearn, @moonlightandstarshimmer, @chemococktailonthehouse, @1word, @itzjustj-1000, @k-l-a-w-s, @hotdogbread23

Author’s Note: I've been blown away by how kind you all have been about this fic, and I'm so glad you're enjoying reading it as much as I am writing it! We've got two parts to go, and they only get better from here :) Thank you for all the support, and let me know what you think of this chapter!!

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

It’s five o’clock in the morning, and Colt Seavers has already been standing in the misty parking lot for two hours when he finally sees your car pulling in the entrance.

The last twelve hours have been absolute torture for him. One minute, he was walking into the crowded club to drop off some equipment with the stunt coordinator; the next, he was sharing space at the bar with you, trapped under your spell despite all his vows that he wouldn’t keep pushing this flirty thing you’ve been sharing.

He’s been conflicted for months now, knowing that his feelings for you are only getting deeper but also knowing that a relationship with him is the last thing you need. No matter how hard he tries to be noble for you, he just can’t get free from the way you enrapture him so completely — the way he thinks of you every moment of the day, dreams of a future where you could feel about him the way he feels about you.

And he honestly thought you didn’t — that you couldn’t — until last night. When he completely wrecked everything, including your heart.

Colt squeezes his eyes shut again, remembering the way he pulled back from you just a few seconds before your lips would have met. In the moment, it seemed like the right thing to do: cut it off, laugh it off, let it go before he betrayed how absolutely captivated he is by everything you do.

He keeps telling himself that he did the right thing. That he’s no good for you, and you’re better off not getting confused by his overwhelming feelings for you. But he keeps seeing your face — the way all the light in your eyes vanished, the way your shoulders slumped and your expression wilted. He had no idea there were actual, genuine feelings on your part. And for him?

Colt has spent the last twelve hours deliberating how to handle this situation. He knows he has to make it right with you, but the question is how. His inner monologue has quite the speech ready for him. You can’t even THINK about confessing your feelings. You’re the one who has no future, no big dreams, maybe not even much longer to live! You have no right to force that kind of life on anyone. Especially if you really care.

After hours of tormented decision-making, Colt has come to the same conclusion he always does: he can’t let you know how he feels about you. He’s got to apologize, make sure you know he didn’t mean to hurt you, let you think he’s just been flirting for fun, maybe even rekindle your injured friendship. But he absolutely cannot let you know he’s in love with you.

And he is, isn’t he? He wouldn’t have waited with bated breath in the parking lot for two hours if he wasn’t madly, hopelessly, irremediably in love with you.

Colt has planned this conversation thousands of times since last night, but the only thing he can choke out when you climb out of your car and start toward the studio is, “Hey.”

You glance up at him in surprise, clearly less than pleased to find him hanging around the parking lot so early. His heart tightens at the sight of your pale face, the dark circles under your eyes betraying what was probably a sleepless night. “Hey,” you respond emotionlessly.

“Do you have a second?” Colt asks. His voice isn’t quite as strong as he hoped, but the sight of you is sending jolts of electricity through his veins.

You look to the side, pursing your lips and injecting a hint of coldness into your voice that he has never heard before. “Honestly, Colt, no offense,” you say plainly, “but I don’t really want to talk right now.”

Colt presses his lips together, knowing he’s the reason for this uncharacteristic coldness. “Believe me, I understand,” he blurts out, “but I’ve got to talk to you about last night.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you shoot back, fixing your stare on him again. Behind the coldness in your eyes is a deep sorrow that twists his heart. “I misread the signals, I overthought it, it’s not a big deal. You don’t need to explain anything.”

“Yes, I do,” he insists. “I messed up big time. I haven’t had a moment’s peace since last night, and I have to get this off my chest, okay? You don’t have to say anything.” He knows he sounds desperate, but he’s past caring. “Please, just hear me out and let me explain.”

You hold his stare, unrelenting, unforgiving. He loves you for it. “Fine.”

Colt releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding, overwhelmed with relief that you’re even willing to listen to him. His biggest worry all night was that you wouldn’t speak to him, wouldn’t let him make things right.

He plunges right in, knowing it will be messy but not caring. “Listen, I’m really bad at this, but I’m going to give it my best go. These past few months that I’ve known you… it’s been really nice. You’re amazing to be around, and I always feel better after I’ve hung out with you. You’ve honestly been the best thing about this shoot.”

Your expression doesn’t change, but Colt can feel the iciness in your gaze softening ever so slightly. It gives him the courage to press on, even though he knows what he’s about to say is going to devastate himself.

“The thing is,” he continues, heart in his throat, “I’ve been so caught up in just… flirting and messing around, that I haven’t paid attention to how it might affect you. I haven’t been paying attention to the signals either.”

You furrow your brow at him. “What are you saying?”

Colt, you are the worst at this, man.

“I’m saying… I’m really sorry that I hurt your feelings last night. I’ve been replaying it over and over in my mind, and I can’t get past the way you looked at me when I pulled away and laughed everything off. Just, the look in your eyes and the way you looked like I had let you down — it’s been killing me.”

Your expression finally softens, and Colt hates himself for the words that are coming out of his mouth. “I thought this was just a fun flirtation between friends and that it would be better to keep any physical stuff out of it. I didn’t know there was anything on your side. Honestly. Not until I saw how much it hurt you for me to just… act like it meant nothing.”

There it is again — that hint of betrayal in your eyes. Now that Colt knows you care for him, his decision to “do the right thing” suddenly seems like the most gut-wrenching, agonizing thing he’s ever done.

It’s all I can do. I have nothing to offer, nothing to make a relationship worth the pain it would cause. I love you, and that’s why I won’t tell you.

Your brow is still lined with confusion, trying to parse out his real meaning among the confusion of words. “But you’re still saying… it didn’t mean anything to you.”

This is killing him. “Of course it meant something to me,” Colt blurts out before he can stop himself completely. He tries to amend it. “Man, I am so bad at this. What I’m trying to say is… I would never have even started a flirtation with you if I knew it would hurt you. Please believe me when I say I would never, ever, in a gazillion years want to do anything to hurt you or make you feel like I don’t care about your feelings. I should have been more sensitive and realized that I can’t just… lead you on without it mattering.”

Lead you on. As if I didn’t mean every word I’ve ever said to you. As if I wouldn’t die for you right now.

You nod, pursing your lips again with a clearer, more determined look in your eyes. “So, just so we’re clear,” you say slowly, “there’s nothing going on? All this flirting and hanging out and almost-kissing — it’s just been for kicks?”

“No, no, not just for kicks,” he backtracks immediately. Even when he’s trying to be noble, he can’t betray your trust that far. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“What did you mean, Colt?” He can hear the genuine confusion in your voice. “I don’t understand what you’re trying to tell me.”

Colt takes a deep breath, closing his eyes as he tries to focus on the right thing to say. “I’m just trying to tell you that I am so, so sorry for anything I’ve done to hurt you. I’ve been stupid and insensitive and awful, and I wish there was a way I could make it up to you. I just…” He opens his eyes, fixes them on yours so you know he’s telling the truth. “I couldn’t let this go without making it right with you. No matter what, you mean a lot to me, and the thought of losing your friendship honestly makes me miserable. Please just tell me I haven’t messed this up beyond repair.”

Please tell me I haven’t lost your trust completely. Please tell me I haven’t damaged the person I love most beyond repair.

You stare him down for what feels like an eternity, your discerning gaze burning holes into him. Finally, you sigh, seeming to come to a decision. “No, you haven’t,” you tell him at last. “I mean, I’m still trying to process everything and sort it all out, but… it means a lot that you wanted to have this conversation.” A note of humor slips into your voice, and the twinkle in your eyes makes a very welcome reappearance. “I mean, you waited for me in the parking lot like a stalker, so that says something. Not sure what.”

Colt laughs out loud at that, all the intense pressure of the night lessening with your words. “I thought about camping outside your hotel, but I thought it might be a little much.”

“Yeah, it would have been,” you agree, scuffing your shoes on the pavement.

Colt feels like the weight of the entire world has been lifted off his shoulders, but he knows he has to keep handling this the right way if he doesn’t want to risk hurting you again.

“So, are we okay?” he asks sincerely.

You nod, smoothing your hair back and closing your eyes while you think about your response. “Yeah. Yeah, we are. Just… getting some closure and some straight-shooting takes a lot of stress out of this.”

“Yeah, me, too,” Colt agrees. “I’m just sorry it took me so long to shoot it straight with you.”

If you can really call this shooting straight.

You shake your head, raising your eyes to meet his again. “No, I should have been more upfront, too,” you admit. “It would have saved me a lot of trouble.”

Colt’s first reaction is to argue, to insist that you haven’t done a single thing wrong, that this whole tangle has been caused by his inability to let go of the feelings he has for you, but he knows it’s best to let that go. Better to end on a positive note.

“Friends?” he asks tentatively.

“Friends.” You grin at him, obviously as relieved as he is to have mended your relationship.

Great, just friends again. Exactly what we wanted. Colt elects to ignore his inner monologue this time.

With the tension lifted at last, you heave a grand sigh and nudge his shoulder in the old familiar way, heading in the direction of the studio.

“So, where are you off to?” Colt asks you, falling in step beside you.

“Train station set,” you reply lightly. “Filming for that scene is supposed to start next week, so I’m scrambling trying to get everything finished. It’s the biggest set I’ve ever created from scratch, so it’s been a serious challenge.”

Colt grins down at you, nudging your shoulder with his the same way you just did. “I’m sure it’ll be amazing,” he assures you, meaning every word of it. “Your sets always are.”

You grin back up at him, your cheerfulness infectious. “What about you? Any big stunts today?”

“Nah, just rehearsing some choreography for a fight scene. Easier schedule for the rest of this week.”

“That’s good,” you respond. The art trailer, empty in these early morning hours, is coming into sight now. “Maybe you can stop throwing yourself off moving vehicles for awhile.”

Colt smirks. “Yeah, that’s the plan. Unless something crazy happens on my way to the gas station or something.”

“Oh, sure. You never know with a Citgo.”

The two of you share a laugh, and suddenly everything feels back to normal. Maybe it can never be completely normal again, but after the fears that kept Colt awake all night, this feels like he’s just stepped into paradise after being cast out.

“Hey, bad guys come in all shapes and sizes,” Colt informs you, feeling his sense of humor coming back full force. “Sometimes it’s a hard-boiled gangster chasing you on top of a transfer truck; sometimes it’s a plastic bag flying off the pavement and around your head.”

“Maybe that’s the real reason why recycling is so important,” you quip. A few more steps, and the two of you are standing at the door to the art trailer, the pink rays of sunrise beginning to touch the tops of your heads. “Well, here’s my stop. Thanks again for talking with me. It really means a lot.”

Colt nods, a genuine smile crossing his face. “I couldn’t let things be strained between us. Who would patch together the props I destroy in every take?” he teases you.

“Who would destroy the handmade props I painstakingly create every day?”

“Publicity stunts wouldn’t have been the same without you to critique my color coordinating choices.”

“I was really going to miss you sneaking me a packet of Mini Muffins every morning.”

“Consider the Mini Muffins sneaked.”

You grin at that, and Colt’s heart speeds up a few beats just at the sight. He’s glad to have this image — your captivating smile, framed by the pastel light of the sunrise, happiness sparkling in your eyes — to replace the one from last night.

You don’t say a word before turning to open the door to the art trailer, clearly needing some space, so Colt turns to walk away, but the door doesn’t close behind you. When he turns back to face you, you’re lingering in the doorway, an unreadable expression on your face. Colt hesitates, not sure what you expect from him, but he’s cut off by you closing the distance between the two of you and wrapping your arms around his neck.

What what what what what what WHAT WHAT WHAT—

Colt isn’t sure this is the best idea, but he certainly isn’t going to make the mistake of pushing you away again. Instead, he lets his arms fold around your waist, pulling you close against him. Every muscle in his body aches to hold you as tight as he can, and it takes all his self-control not to lift his head up a few inches, to whisper in your ear, You’re every sweet dream I’ve ever had. You’re everything I hoped love would turn out to be.

You don’t make a move to release him, and suddenly Colt realizes: this is your way of letting go of him. You’re taking one last moment to savor this closeness before you resign yourself to a simple friendship and an inevitable goodbye. With that realization, Colt grips you tighter, lets his face rest in the crook of your neck while he breathes you in.

The sun keeps rising, and still you hold onto each other as if this is the last time you’ll ever see each other.

Colt feels your arms loosen their hold around his neck slightly, and he takes that as a cue to release the death-grip he has around your waist. He didn’t realize he could feel your pounding heart against his chest until you’ve pulled back a few inches.

He’s surprised, though, when you don’t get go of him completely. You let your hands rest on his broad shoulders, your eyes searching his own for some answer that you can’t quite grasp. It’s as if you know he’s holding something back — as if you can tell how deeply he feels for you just by the way he stays absorbed in the warmth of your gaze.

A sad smile tugs at the corners of your lips, and you lift one hand to rest on the side of Colt’s face. His heart instantly starts rocketing again, and all he can imagine is that you’re finally going to go for the kiss that has almost happened three times now. He holds his breath, knowing that he can’t trust himself not to seize you and kiss you with all the passion he’s holding inside.

Your fingertips trace the side of his face slowly, intimately, traveling over his cheekbone, down his jaw, right under his lips. His skin feels like it’s burning from the inside, incinerating him with heat. He knows he’s still holding your waist too tight for someone who is “just a friend,” but holding you is the only thing keeping him sane right now.

Your gaze slips down for a fraction of a second, landing on the spot where your fingers are resting tenderly. Colt’s hands are shaking from the tension. All he can think of is how close your lips are to his, how effortless it would be to lean forward a few inches and live out the daydream he’s had a thousand times before. He doesn’t even blink, unwilling to miss a second of being this close to you again.

Finally, finally, you take mercy on him and lift your fingers from his face, your own expression betraying the level of affection you feel. Right now, all Colt wants to do is close his eyes and let you trail your fingers over his face for the rest of his life, but your touch is already gone, and he finally feels like he can breathe again.

You take an unhurried step back, your eyes never leaving his. Your hands slowly slide down from his shoulders, his letting go of your waist at the same time. The distance between you suddenly feels miles wide, and it’s quite obvious that both of you want to close it again.

But neither of you does.

“Okay,” you murmur, eyes drifting across his face. The early morning sunlight is dancing through the strands of your hair, alighting on the dust particles in the air to create a mystical glow around your face. “I should go.”

Colt barely even registers his own response, still so dazed from the past few moments. “Me, too.”

You take a step inside the art trailer door, eyes hazy. “See you later?”

“Of course.”

You give him one last soft smile and walk into the art trailer. But Colt stands in the light of the rising sun for a long time after you’ve gone.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

Part 5

[darkshelbyfiction]

Personal Whore (Kink Series)

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Female Reader

Summary: This Series will explore different fetishes including an innocence kink, somnophilia, anal play, watersports, bdsm, marking, edging, and anything else you would like me to include!

In this series, you are Thomas Shelby's maid. You are innocent and shy. This is your first job. Thomas Shelby takes an interest in you and pays you to become his personal whore. He makes you have sex with him in exchange of money, every day, using perverse techniques to satisfy his needs.

PART ONE: ORAL SKILLS

"You have been working for me for two weeks now Love and you recently turned 18, right?" Thomas questioned and you nodded timidly, nervous about what might come next.

"I... yes sir," you whispered softly, averting your gaze slightly out of shyness. The room seemed impossibly large and dimly lit, accented only by the flickering candlelight reflecting off the pristine white sheets upon the bed.

"Very well, that means that you are of legal age for my proposition." His voice dripped honeyed promises.

"Now let me ask you, Love... Do you know what some of the other maids here do for me in order to earn some more money?" your employer asked quietly, watching you closely.

"They perform various tasks, sir," you answered hesitantly, trying not to imagine where he could be going with this conversation.

"That's right," he said before looking at you with even more intensity in his gaze. "And do you know what these tasks entail?"

He asked, leaning closer, his proximity sending waves of anxiety through your body.

"Well," you began cautiously, choosing your words carefully. "Sarah said that, occasionally, she would touch you down there," you blushed, feeling mortified at having revealed such intimate information, albeit indirectly. You noticed a flash of excitement in his eyes when mentioning sensitive areas—a sign that perhaps this wasn't all just talk?

Thomas nodded thoughtfully, his expression unreadable as he processed your response. Then he rose gracefully from his seat, moving deliberately toward you like a predator closing in on its prey. It felt odd being so close to someone with whom you had worked for almost two months without any physical contact beyond casual banter.

"She occasionally touches me, yes," replied Thomas, maintaining eye contact. "But it isn't always required – merely desired. So I wonder, my dear, how far would you go for some extra compensation?" He smirked subtly, inviting himself deeper into the territory where you were reluctant to venture.

The heat of the moment caused you to feel flustered and uncertain as you attempted to gauge the severity of Thomas' intentions. Your heart raced faster than ever before, threatening to escape your chest as sweat glistened lightly along your brow.

"You want me to touch your pe..., uhm, you know...down there..." your voice trailed off, unable to find the courage to say the word 'penis'. Thomas smiled reassuringly, appreciating your discomfort as he realized you hadn't quite grasped the extent of his proposal.

"Yes, sweetheart. I want you to touch my cock and, maybe, one day, you will even take it in to your mouth or let me put it into your pussy, eh," Thomas stated confidently while running his hand across your cheek, causing involuntary shivers to run up your spine.

Your face colored deeply with embarrassment, though it also held an undeniable hint of curiosity. While your desire to please and satisfy your newfound benefactor burned intensely, something inside you screamed that taking things further than simple caresses went too far - yet another layer of turmoil added to the complex relationship unfolding between you both.

Having sensed your inner conflict, Thomas chose to approach the subject tactically.

Slowly, tenderly brushing aside a lock of your hair, he asked: "How does that make you feel, sweetheart?" His tone betrayed no judgement or impatience, instead offering understanding and acceptance. "Do you think you can handle that sort of responsibility?"

You trembled underneath his gentle ministrations, torn between fear and arousal, struggling to process your rapidly evolving feelings towards your once strictly professional superior.

"I never even seen a man's private parts before, sir. I was saving myself for marriage, but some extra cash would sound nice too," Your statement came out as a quiet plea for guidance, a confession of ignorance that exposed your vulnerability.

"Well, for what it's worth, no one would ever find out, Love. Not even your future husband," Thomas said and there was a sinister edge to his tone.

"I know that you are a good catholic girl, but sometimes it is worth doing bad things for the right incentive, wouldn't you agree?" Thomas said before he decided to lay bare his plans for you. "So, listen very carefully. If you agree to carry out these tasks, then I promise you that I will give you double your usual wages for the duration of your employment. In addition, I will give you £500 for your virginity and loyalty. How does that strike you?"

Stunned and bewildered, you stared at him in disbelief. Double your pay for doing things you didn't understand fully and parting ways with your cherished purity – your whole world suddenly seemed to spin wildly out of control. Yet despite the magnitude of the choices facing you, one thing remained clear: continuing as your present self would lead to financial ruin.

With tears swelling in your eyes, you found yourself considering Thomas' offer, wondering whether surrendering everything you believed in truly amounted to nothing less than selling your soul. Still, it was difficult to resist the lure of instant prosperity, particularly given the dire straits you faced otherwise. As you struggled internally, Thomas watched patiently, waiting for you to decide. Finally, with a heavy heart, you made your decision.

Nodding solemnly, you declared, "Alright, Mr. Shelby, I agree, but I need you to triple my wages and add another £500 for my virtue."

With an approving smile curling at the corner of his lips, Thomas conceded, "Agreed. I will triple your wages and pay you a lump sum of £1,000 for your precious purity," your employer said before unbuckling his belt without bothering to remove the rest of his clothes.

"Understandably, you may need time to become comfortable enough to execute these duties adequately, so I shall start you off slowly," Thomas explained calmly before unzipping his pants and thereby exposing his erect member. Despite your reservations, you couldn't help but notice the size and firmness of his cock as he pushed down his pants halfway. 

"It doesn't look so scary, does it, Love?" he murmured, his voice holding an undercurrent of amusement, attempting to ease your apprehension as he reached for your hand, guiding it tentatively towards his penis. With an anxious breath, you followed his instruction, marveling at the weightiness of his organ, still unsure of exactly what he expected from you.

As your fingers traced delicate patterns over his length, you discovered small nubs on the underside, eliciting a deep groan from him. Uncertain about your progress thus far, you glanced upwards briefly to catch sight of his reaction, finding satisfaction etched upon his features.

"See, Love, we're making headway already," Thomas commented gently, encouraging you with warmth.

Despite your lingering apprehensions, the confidence exuded by your master proved infectious, allowing you to relax somewhat and follow the path laid out before you.

Inch by inch, your exploration continued until you encountered the tiny knobbiness located near the base of his organ. Upon stimulating it, Thomas' moans grew louder, confirming your suspicion that you had struck gold.

Encouraged by this success, you bravely moved onto his sacrum, discovering that a soft ticklish patch accompanied it. Smiling sheepishly, you proceeded to explore the area thoroughly. After satisfying yourself with a leisurely tour, you finally turned your attention back to the main event – his impressively throbbing phallus.

Feeling emboldened, you took hold of the tip, applying a slight pressure that resulted in a low grumble emitting from Thomas.

Taking hold of your hand again, he positioned it correctly, demonstrating proper technique. Encouraged by his expertise, you mirrored his movements and gradually increased the strength of your strokes, matching his fervent pace.

"That's it, love! Keep going!" he urged, his hands now wrapped tightly around yours before making a somewhat unusual request.

"How do you feel about taking my cock into your mouth, Love?" Thomas whispered huskily, watching your every move closely.

"You want me to do what?" you asked, still feeling uneasy about performing such acts. The mere idea sent waves of nervousness coursing through your body, prompting your limbs to quiver.

"I want you to practice sucking my cock, Love," Thomas insisted matter-of-factly, a commanding authority evident in his tone.

Swallowing hard, you hesitated for a brief moment before asking timidly, "Like a lollipop?" 

"No, not like a lollipop, Love," Thomas replied, his words filled with amused indulgence. "Just wrap your lips around the head first and start by licking off my pre-cum. Trust me, it won't be as terrible as you might imagine."

His assurance did little to alleviate your anxiety, but nonetheless, you nodded obediently.

Gingerly, you took his thick shaft into your small hands, immediately experiencing a strange mixture of revulsion and fascination.

Carefully lowering your head, you pressed your tongue to the engorged head, savoring the salty taste of his precum.

"There you go, sweetheart. Lick around the ridge just above the hole," Thomas instructed you kindly, clearly aware of how intimidated you were feeling.

"That's a good girl," he told you and, just as you obeyed his directive, your fingers simultaneously worked to stroke the entire length of his impressive manhood.

"Now take me in your mouth, sweetheart. As far as you can," Thomas commanded authoritatively, his voice full of raw demand as, with trembling fingers, you complied, opening wide to accommodate his girth.

"Beautiful," Thomas breathed, appreciating your attempt before holding onto your hair and pulling slightly to guide your mouth deeper down on his erection.

As your lips grazed the sensitive skin beneath his glans, a wave of dizziness assaulted you, leaving you gasping as you tried to regulate your breathing.

"There you have it, sweetheart, take it all," Thomas directed firmly, pressing your mouth harder against him. Gulping reflexively, you felt the foreign object filling your mouth, causing your cheeks to bulge comically.

"I will fuck your throat now," Thomas muttered roughly, thrusting himself further into your open mouth, causing you to gag involuntarily. Your eyes watered with the unexpected intensity of sensation. But even amidst the choking panic, something inside you recognized an undeniable thrill.

Thomas held you firmly in place, ensuring you maintained eye contact throughout the experience. As your struggle to maintain control intensified, so did his aggressiveness.

"Good girl," he growled approvingly when you managed to adapt quickly, albeit tears streaming down your face and saliva dripping from your chin.

His cock now nestled comfortably within your tender throat, Thomas began moving faster, building momentum. His touch became more forceful as you submitted to his demands blindly, consumed by newfound passion.

"Do you know what happens to a man when he orgasms, Love?" Thomas asked teasingly, raising an eyebrow playfully as he continued to use your mouth and throat for your pleasure. 

Confusion crossed your face, unable to discern the meaning behind his inquiry as you shook your head.

"Well, when I cum, seed will spill out from my cock right into your eager mouth," Thomas clarified casually while fondling your wet cheek. "Are you ready for that?"

Your brow furrowed, processing the implications of his statement. It dawned on you that your role as his sexual submissive required complete submission, including receiving the ultimate release from your employer.

You nodded silently, acknowledging your willingness to accept whatever fate awaited you. And as Thomas' hips started bucking violently, indicating his imminent climax, you steeled yourself, preparing for the inevitable outcome.

"Good girl. I want you to swallow my load completely," Thomas ordered, his voice rough with anticipation as he thrusted in and out of your throat. Without question, you opened wider, bracing yourself for the sudden explosion. As Thomas' hips jerked forward, releasing a torrent of hot semen directly into your gaping mouth, you could barely contain your shock. The searing liquid burned your throat, stinging fiercely, but you endured, determined to satisfy your master. Consequently, Thomas let loose a powerful roar, his muscles tensing powerfully, as his body convulsed in ecstasy.

Pulling away from your tender mouth after the volley was spent, he looked deeply into your eyes, searching for any signs of resistance or regret. Finding none, a satisfied smirk formed across his lips. "Very good indeed, Love. Now open your mouth and show me your tongue once again," commanded Thomas, placing one palm on either side of your face. Submissively, you parted your lips to expose your reddened tongue, waiting patiently for further orders. "Keep practicing, because soon you'll be giving me blowjobs regularly until, in two weeks or so, I will fuck this virgin pussy of yours," he informed you confidently, running his finger along your neck, arousal evident in his gaze.

Understanding implicitly that your services would extend beyond the confines of today's encounter, you silently accepted your fate without protest.

After all, despite the humiliation and unfamiliar experiences you underwent, there remained an inexplicable allure. Something about submitting entirely to the desires of another piqued an unidentifiable desire deep within you, stirring feelings that seemed almost forbidden. In time, perhaps these indistinct yearnings could evolve into something concrete and tangible. For now, however, you must focus solely on perfecting your skills as Thomas' personal pleasure provider and you soon learned that his requests are more than just a little unusual. 

[cyb3rtarot]

Pick a Pile: Message From Your Inner Child + How You Can Nurture Them

Disclaimers: choose the pile you feel intuitively drawn to; you can choose more than one! Take what already resonates and leave anything confusing or stressful. Readings are not replacements for professional advice. I used a mix of tarot, oracle, and my intuition.

pile 1->pile 2

pile 3->pile 4

░░░

Pile 1

Message [Justice||nine of hearts rx, king of pentacles, nine of wands rx, three of pentacles rx]: hi pile one! Your inner child wants to express feelings of dissatisfaction or being stifled. Many of you are in a good place financially/with work, at least compared to where you used to be. This came from working very hard without much support from others—maybe even being hindered by others. Other people might look at your life and wish they had it, but your inner child does not seem fulfilled by whatever your position is. I don’t sense ungratefulness, but it does seem like your inner child is more interested in something “deeper” or more meaningful than your physical reality is providing. If you’ve had to claw your way out of hard situations, your inner child seems to be looking for some kind of justice or retribution regarding that. You may feel like you deserve more happiness after what you’ve had to go through, or want people who have done you wrong to be punished.

How you can nurture your inner child [the fool, the emperor, king of pentacles rx, three of swords rx]: a more proactive approach to finding meaning and happiness in your life will nurture your inner child. You might be used to going with the flow—especially if you’re materially comfortable or seeking such a lifestyle. Remember that you have the power to initiate new beginnings; you don’t have to stay the same! Give your inner child space to grow and discover what feels right to them, even if it doesn’t make sense to others. Don’t force yourself to remain in an unhappy spot when there are changes within your grasp. Uncertainty is a necessary part of life. There’s also a big emphasis on balancing your work for outer stability with this search for inner happiness; perhaps some of you unnecessarily overwork yourselves which leaves little time for other things. 

For some, this soul searching may involve letting go of past hurts. I’m not trying to force you to forgive others, but to identify how your current reality has formed as a response to pain, and how you can choose to respond differently.

Extra details: isolation, loneliness. Past betrayals and enemies. Being “self made,” supporting oneself. Not being seen and understood, wearing a facade/mask. Music as solace, singing, pop stars (Ariana Grande again lol?). Balance. Being the tough kid, defending yourself. Paying your own way through school. Aggressiveness. Continuous conflict with colleagues or family, unhappiness at work. Wanting to leave a “good” job, or wanting to “run away” (some of you may be daydreaming about “drastic” action, like suddenly quitting and going on a long trip, far away from everyone you know).

░░░

Pile 2

Message [the star rx, seven of wands rx|| nine of swords, the star, four of pentacles rx]: hi pile two! There is a lot of past hurt and trauma in this pile, and your inner child is highly encouraging healing/shadow work. Your inner child is wanting you to lower some of those internal walls so those uncomfortable emotions and memories can be processed. If you feel you need someone like a professional to help you, that is absolutely okay. Healing is hard, trauma is messy, and the “despair” in this pile seems particularly heavy.

How you can nurture your inner child [two of hearts, the tower rx, queen of pentacles rx, the lovers, six of cups rx]: a major focus for your healing journey is examining how past hurts—especially in relationships or childhood—are projected onto present day relationships. You may have developed certain traits or behaviors to survive the past, but now they block you from experiencing the intimacy your inner child craves. This is not to say you should compromise boundaries, but know that intimacy and vulnerability themselves are not the enemy. Thinking or acting like they are can even be a way of self-blaming, as if you not needing love would have prevented others from being toxic or abusers. Examine how past patterns can lead to current self-sabotaging, and also give yourself grace if you feel like you made a mistake. Learning how to navigate relationships of any kind is hard, and trauma can make it harder! Know your inner insecurities are not reflective of the relationship, how others see you, or the truth. If you do wish to work on some aspect of yourself or your healing journey, it’s very much within your capacity.

Extra details: fruit is significant, maybe nostalgic memories of someone cutting or giving you fruit growing up? A house with a tile or distinctive roof, roof decorations. The quiet/shy kid. Feeling like you’re falling apart. Clumsiness. Alone. A lot of yelling and hurtful words (particularly in the past). Childhood or domestic trauma. Catastrophizing. I feel like a lot of you are in a romantic relationship that is triggering anxiety. Practicing healthy communication with your partner may be one part of the healing work mentioned above. I also feel like a lot of you jumped from a very toxic home into a very toxic relationship as you came of age; a current relationship may be difficult due to this pattern that developed.

░░░

Pile 3

Message [ the hermit, the fool rx|| Queen of cups, the chariot, justice rx, ten of pentacles rx, the hanged man rx, the tower]: hi pile 3, your inner child had a lot to say! You might repress them a lot. They want you to know you are living with old mindsets and approaches that are no longer aligned with you. You have a very large inner, emotional world and self awareness, but you don’t let this shine through to the outside. There’s a big nihilistic vibe of just going through the motions and accepting your lot—even when you’re miserable—and even when there’s changes you can make. An imbalance exists between the energy directed towards your mind versus the outside world. There’s a sense of solitude and a “what’s the point?” approach. However, there’s also a sense of restlessness. Your inner child is feeling stifled by this lifestyle; they want to come out and experience enthusiasm! It seems major changes are present or coming in where this can be addressed.

How you can nurture your inner child [the lovers rx, king of swords, knight of wands rx, the emperor rx]: your inner child is encouraging you to embrace excitement for life. It feels like your nihilistic or apathetic approach functions as self-punishment by denying your desires. You’re aware of which things are not working for you anymore, but you’re avoiding tough conversations or decisions. Your inner child wants to break free and to go after what gives them joy; they do not want their emotions to be judged, repressed, or punished. Some of the self awareness you’ve developed in your inner world can be used to help navigate the disappointments and uncertainties of life. You have to wade past these things to reach the treasures in your journey.

Extra details: restlessness, emo (some of you were in middle school), quiet, hurting, simmering anger, Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day, taking an analytical approach to emotions, singing, not being allowed to express emotions growing up. You might say “perhaps” a lot. Water, wanting to live in or visit a location close to water.

░░░

Pile 4

Message [seven of wands rx, king of hearts, the hermit, strength rx, queen of swords|| queen of pentacles, queen of cups rx, five of cups rx, death rx]: hello pile four! The focus of your message is healing vulnerability. You guys have had to be strong by yourself for a long time. For those working on spirituality, it feels like that was the focus of this period. This “hardened” time can come to a close and give way to a new era where you’re more able to face feelings and express them authentically. Your inner child is pointing to a past experience (or multiple) you can revisit to do healing work. This may be a very disappointing heartbreak in a past relationship (of any kind). You might have had to end it with someone who was very attached to you and make that first “hurtful” move so you both could move on and heal. Or, you became disillusioned from lack of emotional fulfillment. Most of you have already done a lot of healing/shadow work and reached a more stable place with your inner sense of security. But, there’s difficulty translating this into being vulnerable with others. Due to the amount of emotional work you had to do, you’re leaning into logic and practicality when there needs to be a balance with emotion. Maybe you can easily identify and scrutinize emotions, but you default to this mental approach to avoid actually feeling it or confronting what you’ve repressed—especially if others’ reactions to your emotions have been disappointing. Protecting yourself is necessary and so is analyzing emotion. But sometimes feelings just need to pass through! We can only “think” our way so far into understanding life lessons. Vulnerability with ourselves—and knowing healthy ways to be vulnerable with others—are both healing.

How you can nurture your inner child [the hierophant rx, king of wands, princess of wands, page of cups rx, the devil rx]: you’ve done a lot of  self-discovery and learning lessons on purpose. This has made space for beautiful growth—however, there’s an emphasis on being open to developing with other people, too. You may want to continue working on yourself in isolation, but some growth and self-knowledge can only be discovered through others. You may repress your inner child’s desire for connection—forcing yourself to be independent. This seems comfortable for you, but not necessarily fulfilling. You may not know where to start with allowing others inside your world. This pile is stuck in the middle of not wanting to deal with toxic BS and yearning for something new + authentic. You may really have to push yourself to leave your comfort zone when it comes to others, and remember that your past experiences don’t define every experience you could have. I’m not suggesting to do things that feel wrong to you, but I am suggesting to notice where you squash your curiosity towards others as a defense mechanism. If you remain true to the things you’ve learned during this time, you’ll be much more adept at spotting insincere people and setting boundaries. And, you’ll be equipped for the inevitable challenges that occur when we get closer to others. These aren’t necessarily bad challenges, but for someone who has learned to love being alone, the metaphorical social “dance” can seem daunting. People are lessons, but not everyone is going to be a hard lesson.

Extra details [TW abuse, self harm, suicide mention]: using spirituality as a reason to not feel (example, not letting yourself feel disappointed because “that’s how it was meant to be”), likes to rhyme or make puns a lot, tendency towards being nonchalant/apathetic, trying to “think” emotions away, not knowing how to stop being so independent. Spiritual, wise, eccentric/enigmatic, self-assured. “Nice” relationships but very few “deep” relationships. Wanting to be friendly but getting alarmed when someone want to be friendly back lol. May have been in a relationship with a very imbalanced power dynamic; someone may have had the power to punish you? In & out the hospital as a child or a very big medical incident. Working in medical (specifically getting nursing) or as a coach, trainer. Surgeries & surgical scars (especially emergency surgery to save your life), medical implants & devices, physically disabled. SH scars. Past attempt on one’s life. Unwilling to feel emotion in fear of getting swept away by them. Stoic on the outside, emotional inside. Always trying to “solve” your emotions

░░░

[ryukenzz]

Muzan Kibutsuji - SFW & NSFW Headcanons

[Note: Relationship Headcanons of Muzan Kibutsuji from Demon Slayer. Reader will be human and a regular citizen for this scenario. Will contain NSFW and slight manga spoilers (just one) so minors/anime-onlys, please do not interact.]

SFW:

Oooooo wee. Mr. Grumpy for a Living himself. Being in a relationship with Muzan can be.... interesting. It can be a lot of things. He can act "generous" and spoil you like a princess or just outright mean as hell. Either way, you'll be treated more as a pet/prized possession than an actual partner.

Muzan, or Tsukihiko, first met you while he was on a stroll with his beloved "wife and daughter." You were minding your business, and the demon just couldn't keep his eyes off you. Of course, the demon chastised himself for even looking at anyone like that, much less a mere human. But, longer he had his eyes on you, the more he wanted to know about you. So, he began planning your move into his castle and his life. This Demon King wanted his Queen. Well... to be more accurate....

He was in need of you.

From your point of view, you noticed Muzan's intense gaze on you that night. To say you weren't fazed by it would be a bold-faced lie. You tried to shake off his glare, but something within you made your eyes turn towards his. The shivers that enveloped your spine, the slight hitch in your breath and body language, none of it went unnoticed by him. Those ruby red eyes of his.... it's like they put you in a trance. One that made you want to know more about him.

The next time you saw Muzan was during a local event in your village. As you went to approach him, the alarm bells in the back of your mind began to ring. Your logic was telling you to stay away from this man at all cost. Deciding to put those thoughts behind, you approach the demon and introduce yourself. Muzan was a bit surprised that you made the first move, but all it did was make his plan of having you that much easier. Giving you a warm smile, he returned your gesture and bowed politely.

“It's a pleasure to meet you as well, (Last Name). I'm Tsukihiko. I apologize for my staring the other night.”

Such a suave liar.

From that day on, a steady friendship ensued between the two of you. Friendly trips to the market, hangouts at local events, night walks in the village. All of it made you come to like Muzan even more. To the point that those feelings became rather.... loving. Initially, you felt guilty for even developing them. The thought of being with a married father made you feel icky. But, being the oh so attentive person that he is, Muzan took note of your inner dilemma and immediately knew how to dissolve those worthless worries. All it took was a fake smile and gentle reassurance.

“(Name), I've come to sense that you're worried about Rei. Well, I can say that it is not necessary. We got a divorce as of recent, and she took our daughter with her. A factor of why is due to what I am.”

Muzan then told you about him being a demon. How he had to consume flesh to survive. This new information made you feel highly conflicted, to say the least. Before you could even process his confession, you heard a twang and found yourself surrounded by a multitude of buildings. You go to question him, but what you saw made your body freeze. Those ruby red eyes you fell for were now a harsh, blood red with slits. The caring Tsukihiko was really the ever atrocious Muzan Kibutsuji, the King of all Demons.

The devilish man stood in front of you, caressing your cheek gently, despite the look of possessiveness in his eyes. It was at this moment that you knew what you were dealing with. It terrified you, but.... it also intrigued you. It only made you fall deeper in love with him. Which is exactly what he wanted. “From this day on, you are mine, and mine only. No demon or man is allowed to be in your prescence, much less look at you. Such filth shall not matter to you. Ever. Do you understand.”

As most people say, Muzan has achieved the rich status and will pretty much spoil you. Anything you want, he's already at the place, cash in hand. That kimono you were eyeing? Already in the closet. A piece of jewelry you talked about getting? He's already putting it around your neck. This man has bought you so much stuff that you feel like a spoiled princess rather than his s/o.

Affection is very rare with him. He's not exactly the romantic type, but when he's in the mood for your touches, he'll just stop you from whatever you were doing and sit you in his lap. He'd caress your thighs and deliver small kisses to your neck. He would hold you tight, almost clingy, but these moments always made your heart flutter.

NSFW:

Now, you know this man is experienced. He's lived for over a thousand years, plus he had five wives in the past (though he treated them like complete shit). Muzan has the knowledge and skills to make the human body experience the ultimate pleasure.

If it weren't for Muzan's ability to hold himself back, he would've jumped on you then and there. The site of the soft ropes decorating the canvas that was your body made him aroused. He decided to heighten the experience by blindfolding you. The demon began to circle you, using the tips of his fingers to stroke the skin of your tummy, goosebumps appearing in their trail. He then moved them to your lips, letting them invade your mouth. You happily sucked on them, a soft moan emitting from you. An amused smirk formed on Muzan's lips.

“Such greed you have. Are you so reluctant to suck on my fingers? Perhaps my cock would be a better option for you then? Hm?”

It seemed his statement went straight to your core. As he stood in front of you and adjusted the rope to spread your legs, Muzan chuckled at the sight of your pussy drooling. Kneeling down, he delivered a series of kisses to your clit while sliding his middle and ring fingers in. To say you were a whimpering mess was an understatement. A combination of not knowing when or what he'd do, plus the feeling of his slender fingers, your cunt sang a song of joy for him.

Muzan is definitely big. He's definitely a good 9 inches and would increase its size to a 10. His cock has veins on both sides, and a pretty pink tip. You didn't know how you were gonna make it with a monster like that, but no worries. Muzan will make it fit. It's why this activity is done with you and you only. Your pussy is the only thing that's capable to handling him.

Your heart jumped a bit when you felt your body being suspended a couple inches off the bed. Was this man really about to fuck you stupid like this? Taking off his clothes, Muzan stood on the bed and used the tip of his dick to tease your entrance. You whined at him to stop the tease and get on with the show. A slap to your clit and the rough pace of his thrusts made you pause your complaint, your loud mewls ringing in the air.

“Cease your complaining. I'm the only one who gives instructions here. Are you that hungry for my cock that you decide to be a brat? To be so desperate as to beg me for it? So filthy. But nonetheless, I will gladly show you just how much I can offer this pussy.”

Muzan's favorite position is definitely between missionary and doggy. Missionary allows him to see you fall apart and mark your neck with his lovebites. Doggy, on the other hand, gives him access to smack your ass to his heart's content. He also loves to push your head into the mattress and fuck you harder. But, his number one will always be you on your knees, sucking him for everything's he's got.

Ya'll have more than likely fucked while he was in his female form. You never knew that tribbing could feel so good. And boy, was Muzan a master at the art. Crossed missionary, cowgirl, you did it all. Of course, she fucked you with dildos of all sizes. Some days, Muzan would overstimulate you with a vibrator attached to your clit.

“You can't handle anymore? How disappointing. You've only had four orgasms so far. Surely you can take more, my naughty girl.”

The overall lesson here? Muzan Kibutsuji is a god at sex, and you will always be left a drooling mess.

[Here's Muzan! Ngl, I went a bit wild with NSFW jdndnrnr💀. Thanks for reading! Likes, comments, and reblogs will be greatly appreciated 💕.]

[Tagging: @sailewhoremoon @frxxst]

[misskattylashes]

The Ballad of Miles Peter Kane

I’m writing this because 80% of the speculation in the AM/TLSP/MK fandom is about Alex – ‘he shags groupies, he’s gay, he’s bi, he’s autistic, he’s an arrogant bastard’....the list is endless. Because he is our master of deception and subterfuge, he opens himself up to speculation.

But on the surface Miles is so different. Happy, smiley, seemingly open Miles, sharing his home and his dog and his family on social media. Chatting away in interviews like a little bird. People think he has it together.

But dig a little deeper and read between the lines, and I get a completely different picture of Miles from the Rascal of 2008 to our One Man Band of 2024.

I have been watching some early interviews with Miles recently and he shoehorns the topic of women and girls into them far more often than Alex ever has. A simple question about if he likes meat is met with a ‘not in a gay way’. At a time when Alex was being photographed looking like Alexa’s little brother or Arielle’s hot gay pal, Miles was being ‘papped’ with his tongue down the throat of the latest hot model or Page Three Girl. There was a sexy girl in every video. And before you say it, yes there were in AM’s videos, but find me one where Alex interacts with them. There was also Miles’ relationship with Suki Waterhouse which I find hard to believe wasn’t real, unless he is far better than Alex at faking a relationship.

Controversial as this may be, but in my opinion, early videos of baby Al flirting openly with Andy, and pressing himself up against Miles, and a bit later on, even AM Alex flirting with that hunky male interviewer, does not point to someone battling too much with their inner homophobia. I think Alex – as ever – has two personalities. The Alex known to the inner circle is out and has been for many years. But Mr Schwartz - the public facing Alex, struggles with his sexuality and the effect it will have on his career and that of his three ‘brothers’.

But read between the lines of their lyrics from the AM/Don’t Forget Who You Are era. AM is filled with longing, of someone who doesn’t know where they stand with this secret - keeping lover who treats them differently at night than during the day. DFWYA is still full of ‘she’ and ‘her’ songs, although ironically the lyrics to Out of Control are so Milex coded it’s funny. I will always maintain Give Up is about Alex (I think ‘stand so tall’ is a figure of speech rather than literally lol) lyrics like ‘you’re pretty good looking but I’m looking for a way out’ and ‘stop tainting my soul’ scream Alex. Don’t forget both albums will have been written around the same time, so I am guessing that they were going through the conflict of Miles not knowing what to do, and him somehow blaming Alex for his confusion, but at the same time unable to keep away from him.

So we reach 2015 and the recording of EYCTE. Something happens. Once on stage and once in an interview, Alex talks about them falling in love whist recording the album. Traditionalists will choose to think he means with their ‘girlfriends’ at the time, but once on tour it is obvious there has been a change in the dynamics. Alex is coquettish and sexy, but his stage personas have all been a variation on this since Humbug, but Miles is different. Miles can’t keep his hands off Alex, Miles follows Alex around the stage like a lovesick puppy. In interviews gone are the playful lusty looks of TAOTU era, instead Miles gazes at Alex like he’s the most beautiful and wondrous thing he’s ever seen.

I think Miles had finally seen the light and realised he was in love with his best mate/casual fuck buddy. He could no longer go on treating Alex like some dirty little secret, and he could no longer deny his sexuality.

What happened afterwards? Who knows, I guess they’re the only ones who know the full truth. But they both came out of EYCTE depressed (the two interviews recently posted on here show this), but Miles admitted to having a mental breakdown, and all I can do is speculate why I think this happened. Imagine being a young man fighting inner demons about your sexuality, you finally realise you’re in love with your best friend and promises are made (see Someone to Rely On and Wrong Side of Life) and he leaves you to go off to France to record an album and keep up his ‘relationship’ with his girlfriend. You have laid yourself on the line and taken a huge step for him and he's gone.

In Alex’s defence, he probably had years of Miles letting him down and also the responsibility of AM etc, but this isn’t about Alex.

But time is a great healer and I think Miles came out of the whole period a different person. By Change the Show, we lose the ‘she’ pronouns (just one ‘girl’, and Suzie and Caroline) and sexy girls in videos. Gone are the models and page three girls. There is a brief ‘romance’ with Nadya Duke, but that is it.

So we come to One Man Band. Apart from one ridiculous tongue in cheek podcast with his friend James Buckley, where he goes on about women (incidentally just before the Ireland gigs with AM), Miles has changed. In early interviews, his childhood heroes are Lennon and Oasis…no mention of Baggio. With One Man Band we suddenly get Baggio and in interviews he talks of how eight year old Miles thought Baggio and the Italian football team were sexy. Old Miles would have followed that up with something like ‘the sort of sexy that pulled birds’, but there was nothing like that, instead he was admitting that part of his sexual awakening was admiring Italian men.

The video for The Wonder had a sexy woman, his friend Didem, but somehow the dynamic felt different, the general vibe was more two mates mucking about.

His stage persona is more ‘fruity’, he is using ‘she’ pronouns but to address himself, and whilst he isn’t ‘out’ - he may never come out publicly, it is entirely his choice - there is definitely a change in Miles, he seems more settled and happy in his own skin. He said he had therapy during the bad period and hopefully that helped. Interestingly he has posted songs about difficult relationships with fathers, and without casting aspersions on Miles’ dad, I wonder if part of his earlier issues were about him trying to please him. Liverpool has quite a macho culture – especially 20-30 years ago. Let’s not forget Miles liked and commented on that beautiful poem about men who know they are gay even when they are children. Maybe it resonated….

Miles story is a fascinating one, a look at a young man fighting his inner demons to get to a point where he knows his true self. I always think Troubled Son is the counter to Body Paint. But Troubled Son is about Miles coming to terms with who he is and accepting his own faults, Body Paint is Alex keeping on his costume, which he doesn’t look like taking off any time soon. Hopefully private Alex is as happy as Miles, and it’s just that public face that looks as though their world is ending.

[silent-sanctum]

During sdc Kakyoin notices that reader and Jotaro like each other but they’re too oblivious to realize it, so he acts as a wingman.

Hello dear anon! Sorry it took a while to fulfill this request but hey, your request has been written ^^. Oh just to add in a lil something, I've written another request that's similar to yours, so maybe you'd like to check it out as well! Hope you enjoy~~

Playing Cupid - Jotaro x Reader

word count: 2k+

Kakyoin wasn’t the type to be invested in romance. The genre didn’t pique genuine interest from him due to the majority having a plot that involved someone getting paired with someone else and nothing else.

But just because he isn’t one to indulge in romantic content doesn’t mean he’s completely naïve to real-life chemistry. Most especially if the main characters so happens to be two of his close friends- one being a closed-off punk and the other an outspoken gal.

The second you stepped into the scene with utmost confidence and a flustered Jotaro in tow, he could detect the invisible spark between the two, with how the both of you would bounce off of each other’s energy seamlessly without the presence of friction. It’s as if all the bickering, subtle touches, and subconscious choice to stick together came naturally.

And Kakyoin would have enjoyed watching these two people get together... if it weren’t for the obvious hesitation present between you two.

From the delinquent’s part, he could understand. Jotaro wasn’t one to be expressive or open to anyone about his emotions. Everyone had to see the miniscule changes to his face, body language, and gestures in order to know him better on a deeper level, and no one could do that better than you and your keen observation skills towards people.

However, Kakyoin was more confused when it came to your part. You never seem to hesitate when you want something in mind. You often butted heads with numerous Stand users, constantly spoke out to the older adults of the group when you had something to say during the mission, had no issue with dealing conflict between parties as an assertive peacemaker.

But he couldn’t figure out why you couldn’t blurt out a simple confession when it was clear as day that you had feelings for the young Joestar.

It’s not like Jotaro would decline your approaches when he didn’t mind whenever you engaged with him in every opportunity you had. Kakyoin could tell from the way he would look away with a natural blush on his cheeks, the rare smiles he’d show, and the efforts he placed to be around you when he wasn’t the type to do that with others.

You two were into each other but both of you were two idiots that were too oblivious to see that.

So Kakyoin had to put things into course the best his single ass could do.

In certain situations when he found himself in the middle of you two, he’d offer up some excuse to leave you two alone or even suggesting the pair be together during area explorations, in hopes some extra bonding could get you two somewhere.

Alas no progress has been made and he started devising.

The first plan he had in mind was to get either you or Jotaro to think of the other, fueling each other to the point of letting out their inner sentiments. He wasn’t the best at the initiating conversations like you or Polnareff, but he did improve ever since he joined the gang.

He deployed his idea to action and...

“So I’ve noticed you’ve been sticking by Jotaro’s side more often than before. Mind telling me what’s all that about?”

You widened your eyes and flushed a faint pink. “Ah it’s nothing. I just find it more familiar when I’m with him, since you know, he’s the first guy I became friends with among all of us here.”

“I see, but you know what else I’ve noticed?” Kakyoin placed a finger under his chin with a thoughtful expression. “He’s been extra attentive to you lately.”

“O-Oh? You think so? But maybe that’s just because I’m a girl. You know how he is with the non-annoying females...”

“I don’t think so. He wouldn’t waste his time looking after the wellbeing of someone he doesn’t deeply care for. Hell, he’s been doubling his gestures for your happiness and security during the one time you were gloomy.”

You let out an antsy laugh, turning away from his gaze. “Er- He might just be doing those things since I’m his first long-lasting friend and all- Oh! Would you look at that!” You abruptly stood, faking a look to your watch. “It’s about time I meet up with Pol and Avdol!”

---

“Hey Jojo,” Kakyoin said as he sat on the chair adjacent to the relaxing teenager. Everyone else was out exploring the new area, leaving him the opportunity to talk. “Up for a chat?”

Jotaro let out one approving grunt and he took that response as a “yes”.

“Take this with a grain of salt, but you’ve been unusually close to Y/N these days,” he said that prompted the other to look at him with a pointed glare. “I mean I don’t blame you. She’s a delight to be with and I frankly would say I’m impressed by how you’re spending time with her-”

“What are you up to Kakyoin?” Jotaro cut him off, arms crossed.

“Well you see... I’m curious why the always-reserved-and-no-time-for-bullshit Jotaro Kujo is often hanging out with a girl who’s the polar opposite of him.”

“It’s none of your business,” the delinquent said with no hesitation. Another inquiry was about to slip past him when the other stood, tipping his hat over his face before walking off.

Though Kakyoin could still see that faint red in his cheeks that appered every time you were brought up.

He wasn’t sure if Plan A worked well. The main reason why he doubted it was because the two of you still remained the same as before, albeit with a hint of bashfulness now mixed in.

At this point, it became lowkey frustrating to see you two pining for each other without acting on it, but at the same time, found it lovely to watch you be lovey dovey towards the raven-haired, with the latter softening his demeanor at your every interaction.

Desperate moments called for desperate measures. Plan B arose and this time, he had help.

The guy looked like the type who would indulge in the concept of love. It might be because he came from a place known for romance, or maybe it was naturally ingrained in his system. He did know his ways on how to appeal to the female locals with a semblance of suave.

It would come to no surprise if he had an idea on how to pair you together.

“Pol, I need your help in something.”

The Frenchman busied himself with styling his silver hair up, but he glanced at the cherry-haired student with a smile. “What might that be?”

“You know Jotaro and Y/N? They’re kinda... into each other-”

“And it’s annoying that they’re not together yet! Oh my god, finally someone who shares the same feelings I have!” Polnareff dropped his comb to turn to Kakyoin.

“Right? That’s why I need your help.” He placed both hands on the adult’s shoulders. “They’re driving me crazy.”

“Say no more friend. I will do the best that I can.”

Plan B was put into action which ended up in Polnareff doing most of the work with Kakyoin in the side helping out with the minor mishaps.

The adult did what he did when Plan A was still a thing- had a long chat with both parties... but with extra steps. Unlike his straightforward approach of simply chatting, Pol’s tactics involved getting the person in a preferred activity where he and they could hang out in. Only then when they’re eased into it will he initiate the chat.

Kakyoin couldn’t tell the difference between their approaches but he trusted the older and hopefully wiser person in the room.

But Pol did what he did by taking you on a casual date on a nearby cafe, treating you with food and drinks before having the “friend talk”, while he offered the delinquent quality time for smoking around the corner, only for him to somehow transition into the topic of teenage crushes. Kakyoin helped in convincing them to go with him as part of his contribution.

By the end of the day (or rather the week), not much had changed similar to his efforts of trying to get them to confess, but the Frenchman had assured the bright-haired student to “give it time” and it’ll all fall into place.

Kakyoin didn’t know what he meant by that but he knew better to doubt a hopeless romantic.

Weeks passed and by this time, they just defeated another enemy Stand user and they thought they’d give themselves a small break on a small island where Avdol stayed, waiting for the submarine Mr. Joestar acquired that will transport them to Egypt.

Night came and the crew had just finished supper and now off doing whatever they felt like doing during the resting period. The cherry-haired stood by Polnareff the entire time, discussing matters about the updates of the latter’s plan. According to him:

“If my idea goes through, expect him to enter into pondering mode sometime within tonight. Then, we approach him and offer him ‘the advice’”

“Polnareff, you’ve been saying the exact same thing for the past few days.”

“I know, I know! But hear me out! This night is a moment where all of us are resting. Because there’s nothing much to do, Jotaro has no other choice but to retreat into his head and think, and what else is there to think about other than all of my chat about Y/N?”

“His mother's life?”

“W-Well that too, but also the success of his possible love life.”

Kakyoin would have given up with his so-called advice and perhaps even his whole plan of pairing you two... if it weren't for the envisioned scene happening before their eyes- you sat beside him the whole time until you excused yourself and left, leaving Jotaro still in his spot hunched over and deep in thought.

The Frenchman nudged his side and with a wink, he cocked his head towards the delinquent’s direction, muttering “advice time”.

So they did exactly that with Kakyoin being the one to open up first followed by the adult. In the end, you returned and led the poor confused guy into the forest.

Both Kakyoin and Polnareff were left speechless on their seats as they realized that all this time, they were too hyperfocused on Jotaro’s response that they didn’t consider how you would respond to the whole chat Pol stirred up.

After all, you were the more expressive between the both of you. It made sense and the cherry-haired teen didn’t know why he forgot about that minor tidbit about you.

“Do you think they’ll finally figure it out?”

“I really hope so. I’m getting tired of them just walking circles around each other.”

Few minutes passed and they hadn’t returned from their private talk. Polnareff had retreated to slumber land but Kakyoin stayed awake with his curiosity getting the best of him.

He crept through the bushes, toeing over fallen leaves and twigs to not cause any noise. To his knowledge, there was only one scenic spot in Avdol's place and he was willing to bet that you discovered the area as well.

With the path in mind, the teen continued trekking forward until he could see a break in the line of trees.

He reached his destination with admirable stealth and hid himself behind one of the wider trunks. With caution, Kakyoin leaned over slowly to get the glimpse of success.

On the gentle incline of the clearing, he found you peacefully napping with your body blanketed with his black gakuran, laying across the delinquent’s lap and your head situated on his shoulder, while the latter smiled to himself with a new glow to his face as had his eyes closed and his arm placed behind you to support your weight.

And to that, Kakyoin could finally put his goal to rest and actually allow himself to rest as well.

Guess playing cupid with the Frenchman was something he could again in the future.

[thoughtfulchaos773]

Syd and Carmy- A Lover's Quarrel

This meta focuses on the Sexy Complications that I mentioned in a meta called Romantic Beats. I will focus on the clash between Syd and Carmy and what makes their conflicts so compelling to watch on screen.

Truth be told, I get fired up watching Carmy and Syd argue. They're like the turning point between all the other conflicts on the show.

Maybe it's because Carmy really zooms in and focuses on Syd when he's ready to fight?

Or the blocking- which has been covered before in the sydcarmy ship.

Maybe it's how Sydney goes toe toe-to-toe with Carmy if she needs to, but she's the only one to calm him down and snap him out of his patterns.

I think it's all the above.

In screenwriting- how you write arguments it's big on subtext. What I love about Syd and Carmy's arguments- in season 2- is that they're equals, and the truth of what they're really fighting about is starting to reach a boiling point. So what is the argument really about between Carmy and Syd?

2x03 Sundae Carmy turns to Syd once he hears she's not pleased with the changes. He suddenly walks towards her- why is he so close? The argument is about miscommunication and how Sydney feels left out of their process to open The Bear- whereas Carmy thinks they're still fine; they're just as close as they were before. But the blocking- Syd steps away- hinting that this should be a private discussion with Carmy. He's taking her dissatisfaction with the wall literally, and while deep down- Syd is saying- hey, I'm feeling unsure and I'm scared- you gave me all the reason to doubt you today. Please don't give me a reason not to trust you. Once she gives him the solution, Carmy only understands what Syd means- you let me know. But his inner conflict was early that day. Carmy's conflict lies in this dilemma of what it means to be closer to someone- to let someone in and what makes a good relationship. Keep in mind he shut out many people when he was in New York, and now, since Mikey, he has this opportunity to experience a deeper relationship. But that entails being present, making the person happy, and expressing his love without past hurts. He wants love to be fun and joyful. But he needs to figure out how to get there. He's telling Sydney- hey, I'm scared too; this is new to me, and I don't know how to do it because past hurts are showing up for me again. This feels complicated. I'm supposed to be doing this thing with Mikey and it only hurts it's not fun for me. but here you are and I'm also experiencing different emotions I've never felt before and I don't know how to handle it.

Sidebar: The way Fak walks away in the left gif- like he just knows some shit is about to go down between them and the stares from Marcus and Richie (while Fak looks away). So I'm one of many entranced by their arguments?

2. 2x05 Pop

I love that Claire said the errand was anti-climatic- really, the romance between them is anti-climatic (thanks to @currymanganese edit). The climactic moment happens at the end when Syd and Carmy almost argue- something Carmy clearly wants to do with Sydney. But he's mad at himself more than anything. Sydney says you're dismissing me and you weren't there, and I feel alone here. Carmy is saying I know I'm at fault here, I know it's on me- but I'm still here, right? I just want to experience something different this time- and that may get in the way, but I'm still here.

2. 2x08 Bolognese Sydney and Carmy are arguing about Claire going over the menu. But it's about trust, Carmys wanting a better experience with all the trauma he's faced, and this person who's in between their relationship. Someone he doesn't call a girlfriend creates a wedge and steps in where she shouldn't. Carmy and cannolis isn't the issue- it's an important part of his life that he should have shared with Sydney. Sydney is saying this is something you should have shared with me. You're leaving me out again. You won't let me in.

4. 2x10 The Bear

The boiling point of season 2. Carmy is triggered when he thinks he sees his EMP boss. When he returns to the kitchen, he sees the cold dead fish(is there subtext here?) and lashes out at Sydney.

This isn't about the expo station or the cold fish. It's fear that tips over for Carmy. Carmy is back in a cycle he does not want to be in. Carmy is saying, " I'm scared. I've been here before and don't want to do it again. I'm back in this stressful feeling of being in that kitchen. His kitchen. This needs to be perfect.

Sydney is clear in this argument. He was not there. Something Carmy needs to hear.

The conflict lies in Carmy getting out of his old ways so he can build a healthy relationship with Sydney- whereas Sydney has to learn trust and let go and fall so Carmy can catch her- Sydney has to be patient with Carmy's past experience, and Carmy has to learn how to be there for someone, how to know and be close to Sydney.

A well-crafted argument can change the whole dynamic of a relationship. The impending big fight is covered on this sydcarmy ship a few times, but I just wanted to point out how excited I am with the inner conflict in Carmy and Syd's dynamic.

Sooner or later- the truth boils over in arguments between two characters. Will this argument continue to reveal what Syd and Carmy are scared of- will the arguments draw understanding and closeness?

Bring it on season 3!

[majycka]

hi quick random question, do you think Kyoto students and utahime especially her dynamic with Gojo could have been utilised a bit better in shibuya because they have potential if they were fleshed out.

what are your thoughts i just feel there could have been potential.

There certainly was a potential anon!

Reading this linkspooky anon ask, she said that the mechamuru traitor plot line could've been fleshed out more to point out the flaws of the school system(which gege isn't really interested in exploring) thus also allowing us to explore the differences between teacher Gojo and Utahime plus their kids. I agree with what the anon and she had to say so imma try to explain it further.

I know canon told us that Utahime was able to figure out the mole via process of elimination but if we were to really to draw out the traitor plot line, I can imagine Utahime, the investigator, digging deeper into the motive on why possible Mechamaru even considered doing it. She's an attentive teacher afterall so I wouldn't doubt she probably cares about why her kid ends up like that. In this way, we get to see the differences between how Gojo and Utahime treat their kids as well as how the school system using these kids as child soldiers affects them. Through this way, we get to see Gojo and Utahime interact more. I’d dare say that Utahime will probably call out the way how absent and “sink-or-swim” Gojo’s ways of teaching are. I mean, it does work for his students, but sometimes he ignores a crucial and obvious part that they are STILL kids.

That’s the whole point of Nanami’s care for Yuuji who’s originally under Gojo’s wing, and how Yuuji expressed that it’s Nanami underestimating his skills when in fact, Yuuji is STILL a child, and Nanami, as the adult, has to protect him.

Gojo is not too aware of this fact that they ARE still child soldiers because he is raised in the same system afterall. However, with Utahime’s caring, and doesn’t-take-any-bullshit-from-Gojo personality, there’s no doubt she’ll call the fuck out of him. 

Moving on to the actual students themselves, I actually like how Gege kept the Kyoto kids lowkey in this arc and when they showed up, they were a team (even Todo included with his help with Yuuji). I'd like it more if we were shown how the Kyoto kids navigated the culling game arc because the game could have forced Kyoto plus Tokyo to cooperate with each other. Maybe even under Utahime's wing because most of the adults got nerfed in Shibuya. Also, Kyoto kids offer the weaker pov things in the series, and I'm all out for underdog characters. There’s just lots of inner conflict going on when you’re in a world who favors the strong while the weak gets hammered down. 

Moreover, another thematic potential I can think for the kyoto-tokyo dynamic is sharing comradery on entering adulthood. This is somehow shown with Kamo & Maki vs Naoya fight, and imo, this fight is a good CANON example that "at the very verryyy least"  fulfilled the potential of the Kyoto-Tokyo dynamic.

More yapping under the cut cuz this is actually one of my fav fights in CG arc >.<

The goodwill event shows the battling philosophies of the schools, however it also shows how complementary they are..Kyoto wants to be understood in a lashing out way but Tokyo merely responded with callousness to it and has the "who cares what others think" mindset.

Nobara and Momo fight on misogyny

Mechamaru expressing his disability with panda

Megumi vs Kamo "We are the same"

Maki and Mai "why didn't you left the Zenin clan"

I mean Tokyo ain't wrong about their individualistic mindset but at the same time, it just sounded unsympathetic especially when all those kids are all in the SAME boat being child soldiers under the jjk ruthless system. Kyoto kids unhealthily lashes out but they aren't wrong about it either cuz it's a reality that they suffer a lot from this system. These openness of Kyoto Tech however did make them closer like mutamiwa and kyoto girls (mai, miwa, momo).

Overall, Tokyo needed the Kyoto comrade nature while at the same time Kyoto needed the independence of Tokyo kids and in that kamo-maki vs Naoya fight, it showed us how these philosophies made a great working teamwork for them...

Recap to that fight, Naoya shows up as a cursed spirit and boom maki has to deal with it now luckily Kamo is there to help. With the help of Kamo's teamwork, Maki was bought some time to recover (deal with those samurai and sumo duo) and boom defeat him. 

Kamo sympathised with Maki’s situation after the fight. Even back in the fight with Megumi, Kamo seems to be one trying to seek understanding from kids under the big clans because he kinda understands the pressure they are under. Despite barely interacting on screen, it's no wonder 100% Kamo backed up Maki. Moreover, what makes this fight pair up fulfilling is the parallels they have despite being different ends of the spectrum. They even opened up about their family problems, and this is coming from Maki who tends to keep to herself.

"Don’t fall in the same rut."

Maki opens up and give advice in communicating more to their family because Maki regretted not doing the same for their mom, and we cut to throwback of the Kamo’s mom was that she named him Noritoshi just to spite the Kamo clan.

I've seen criticism about this part. It's pretty shitty the mom named her kid practically Hitler,  abandoned the same kid, and expects the kid himself to come back, and I agree with the criticism. However, looking at it from a different angle, it's shown at the same time that jjk is a coming of age series, kids growing into adulthood aka shouldering the shit that adults have failed to do...

Adults can be shit at doing their job to their kids like what Kamo's mom did to Noritoshi. Like c'mon mom! you could have done your job as an adult and be the one to approach your kid or pull him out of the clan situation but no. Sometimes the Reality is fully accepting that parents are shitty sometimes and the kid of the situation has to push themselves to be mature and take over the adult's work, and as for Kamo, that is having to be the one to find his mother to find closure and from then on, he will be the one to decide what will be next.

[tmblrmoon]

Not Like This 🍂 Chapter Four

You stir around until you’re finally awake confused at where you were for a second before you realized the events that led you here last night. Slightly embarrassed at the fact you were borderline plastered in front of Schlatt when you were just getting to know him. At least he had some heart in him to let you stay as you passed out on his couch during the night. You also noticed he gave you a blanket while you were sleeping. You smiled imagining it. It hasn’t even been a week of knowing him and you already have at least a little bit of a feeling surfacing about him. You couldn’t get to the point yet but still you knew there was something about him that kept you wanting to be near him. It’s like he knew that you were finally getting up as he entered the room.

“Morning, doll” His voice still rough with sleep. As you met his gaze with a soft smile “Morning” you let out. “You were out like a light last night [name]” He chuckles. “Yeah..I figured. thanks for letting me crash here though I appreciate it Schlatt.” “Don’t mention it toots. It’s the least I can do plus I didn’t like the thought of you stumbling around alone” His words leaving you a bit flustered as you hid your composure well or tried to at least. “Jambo also loved the new company. I don’t get that many visitors” He admitted with a laugh. “Well guess i will be over here more often to see him more then” You joked. “Wow not even me?” He teased back which you laughed at taking the bold move to flirt back as you got up finally heading back to your own apartment. “I mean i wouldn’t mind seeing more of you. Guess Jambo just a bonus” You laughed reaching down to pet Jambo before opening the door to leave. “Don’t be a stranger” He chuckled as you left him with a smile. An genuine one too You returned his grin looking back at him before closing the door.

“I don’t plan to be one. Don’t worry.”

With that a few weeks went by. You kept your promise. Never being a stranger to Schlatt. Always coming back to him almost every day once you get your work done at home or coming back from occasional meetings. You loved that it was convenient getting to the point where you would be at his place more than your own which he teases you for. With the days getting shorter and the nights becoming cooler you spent them on his porch. Of course he influenced you to drink more which you turned to more since you knew you never had to worry about drinking all by yourself again. You ended up tearing down that wall he had up the very first day you saw him. Still it makes you think how from just stating a noise complaint to now having constant flirty banter with him all the time. You wouldn’t trade it for anything though. You found yourself waiting for Schlatt to get back this time which was rare because it’s usually the other way around but still you give in once you get a text back from him like he said he would earlier.

You spend the time waiting on his return with you on your own porch for once. You didn’t like to drink alone but you can still smoke alone. You admired the leaves above you as they finally started to change color with deep red surrounding you. You loved that you moved here right in time for autumn. Your timing was perfect to say the least. You just wished you could do all the fall activities you missed back home with your friends and family. These thoughts causing you to have a deeper feeling wishing that Schlatt could just make the move already. Which made you shake your head in disbelief still not knowing if he has ever felt or had these countless thoughts before about you but all the nights he would let you spend with him would say otherwise. You remained conflicted as you sat on your porch thinking joint still loose in your hand. A sudden noise behind you startled your inner thinking as you looked behind you to laugh. There was Jambo. Jambo was a frequent visitor of your porch especially with Schlatt knowing this cracking the back window so Jambo could sneak over even when Schlatt wasn’t there. He was still a constant reminder. You always kept food out for him as you got up to refill the said bowl as you got down to his level petting him. “Hi Jambo” You laughed as you spoke to the cat which started becoming a habit for you. “Wonder when your dad is coming back, huh?” You continued basically speaking your thoughts out loud to Jambo. “I just wish he would notice more or maybe i’m not making it obvious for him to make the move?” You spoke out more as Jambo meowed finishing the food. “I just don’t know Jambo but I for sure know that anything is possible I hope.” You reassured yourself as you softly smiled at the orange cat rubbing against your legs. Like the leaves around you something was bound to change soon. All you needed was a signal as just as soon as you were left talking your ear off to Jambo you got one. Your phone pinging that it got a new message. It was from Schlatt with the message reading:

“Will be back soon. Get ready.”

(a/n: this chapter was gonna be way shorter but i didn’t want to do that to yall so i tried my best chapter 5 will make up for it i promise 🫶🏻 also yes this chapter is also inspired by yet another misery club song called left side also if you check out the prologue for this fic i also have the playlist for this pinned with it so if you want to check that out pls do it’s banging 🙏)

[distort-opia]

(1/2) So I read thru your Negativity tag, and if you have the spoons for it (no judgment if you don't): I think part of why so many Joker antis shit on Bruce's no-kill code is because he routinely forgets/loosens it for non-Joker villains/characters in general. KGBeast is the most infamous example, but there's just. Zillions of no-name henchmen and serial killers he's pulled the "Don't have to save you" routine on.

Hey! There's definitely some truth to this argument-- Joker's plot armor is infamous for a reason. However, I think there's a bunch of other factors to take into account when talking about Bruce's no-killing rule and his his flexibility around it, when it comes to Joker specifically.

I wouldn't agree that Bruce routinely forgets his no-killing code, or that he's done it for so many criminals. While it has happened more than once and it is a pattern, it's still more of an exception rather than the rule; most of the time, you see Batman desperately trying to save people, no matter who they are. It's actually something most villains use against him. It's why they constantly take hostages or throw someone off the roof of a building and then run the other way, knowing that Batman would always choose to save someone rather than chase. For a character with nearly a century of history, it's unavoidable he'd have a number of instances he's skirted the line regarding his no-killing rule... but also, for the same reason, you've got to keep in mind how many more cases offset these exceptions. Not to even mention the inherent inconsistencies that arise, when you've got thousands of writers handling one character over so long. The "I don't have to save you" thing is characterization more accurate to the Bruce Wayne present in Nolan's trilogy, which is where the line comes from. Also, there's a distinction to be made between Bruce directly attempting murder and Bruce allowing someone's death to take place indirectly. The KGBeast example is indeed one of the most famous, but to be fair, it was retconned very soon after-- with Bruce feeling guilty about leaving the villain to die and calling the police [Batman (1940) #439]. I've actually got a couple of posts talking about Bruce's patterns and his no-killing rule here, and here (with the latter being Joker-oriented).

To sum up a bit though, in the last post I make the point that Bruce has nearly killed Joker with his own hands twice (first time he got stopped by Jason, second time by Jim, and to be honest if I take Zdarsky's run into account, a couple times more). He also allowed for the possibility of Joker's death like three times just off the top of my head (letting him crash with the helicopter in DitF, letting Jim shoot Joker in NML after Sarah Essen-Gordon's murder, walking away from Joker while he had a bomb strapped to him at the end of Joker War). And thing is, Bruce has also canonically nearly stabbed Riddler, pretty much pushed Penguin out of a moving car even though he'd just gotten his throat slashed, left Scarecrow to die a potentially very gory death, and I could keep going... But then why is Joker special? Why do people still feel like he's the one getting special treatment, and find it so annoying that Bruce keeps saving his life? That he just won't die?

Well, it's two things: frequency and meaning, and they go together. Batman and Joker are one of the most famous hero-villain pairings in modern comic books, and the conflict at the centre of their dynamic defines their characters to the extent that writers can't help but come back to it, again and again... for the drama, the emotional stakes. See, it's much more engaging and it carries more weight to write Batman into situations in which his nemesis, the one person who's ruined his life most, is dying or facing death-- because then, the no-killing rule and his inner conflict over it is that much deeper and poignant. It's still interesting to see Bruce struggle with his treatment of more generic criminals, or even some of the famous Rogues, but Joker is special because he exists to challenge the no-killing rule. Joker makes it his goal to get Batman to cross the line and kill him. Joker literally wants Batman to kill him! But if Batman kills him and crosses the one line that he feels makes him who he is, then there's no story to tell anymore. You've got a monster like The Batman Who Laughs or the Bruce Jason encountered in Countdown, and a dead Joker.

In the end, complaining that Joker is in so many life-or-death situations and that he never dies because (more often than not) Batman saves him, is like complaining that a knife cuts your stake too well. Joker, as a character, is doing what he's designed to do. I will readily admit that DC has overdone this to death, and that many times it isn't written well. Joker's plot armor has gotten ridiculous, mostly because DC will never retire such a popular character that's making them so much money. But at the end of the day, if you argue that Bruce's no-killing rule (Batman's core tenet) has no meaning because it's being used to create drama for money... you could argue the exact same thing about many other traits and DC characters, unfortunately. Just pick a story and follow the thread. For example, something similar could be said about the recent Gotham War arc; maybe DC went "Oh, Batman cares about his Family and he struggles with his darker side? Smash those two together and rake in the cash! Let's make them all fight each other! Sure, we did this a bajillion times already, but this time..."

Anyway. I'll stop rambling, but you get my drift. Unfortunately, as comic fans (and not only), we live in a reality in which most of the time, money is the very real Doylist motivator. But we can't only be Doylists, it's impossible (and way too bleak); we've got to be Watsonian too. Take the story as it is, and create meaning. Even when there might be little intended, or perhaps especially then-- through the transformative power of our own interpretations. Or at least, that's how I see it.

[eldritch-nightmare]

If it isn't to much trouble could I get something of a part 2 to the puppeteer fic you wrote? Like Maybe from his pov where he realizes he does have much of a deeper love for his s/o and he starts showing it to them i

a/n: of course! i recommend you read part one if you haven't already since i'm pretty proud of that post, but it isn't required tbh.

hesitant to love.

pairing: puppeteer x gn!reader.

synopsis: the puppeteer has been dating you for a while now, and he thought it was just a casual thing but after a conversation with emra, he begins to realize that it's something deeper.

word count: 1.2k words.

warnings: use of y/n, he's very conflicted about his emotions, fluff, angst if you turn it upside down and squint, confessions of love, heavy use of italics.

"You're in love with them, aren't you?"

Emra's words echoed in his mind as he stared blankly at the door she had just walked out of. He almost wanted to burst into laughter, being accused of such a thing! Ha!

Love? Him? Please.

Sure, he's a bit kinder to [Y/n] than he is to anyone else, and maybe he enjoys their company more than he would like to admit. And yeah, he does have a bit of an attachment to them. And maybe he does enjoy the smiles he gets when he cracks a joke and the gentle gaze they always seem to reserve just for him.

But love? No. No way. He's an evil spirit that feeds off negative emotions! How could he possibly feel a weak emotion such as love?

There's no way! There's simply... no... way...

Huh...

Now that he's thinking about it... he does always seem to be in a better mood whenever [Y/n] is around...

They always know how to cheer him up whenever he's feeling down as well. Not even Emra can do that anymore. And yet they're able to do it so easily.

And even when he's not in the mood to see anyone, he's still okay with sitting in silence with them. He's never been like that with anyone, not in a good long while.

Dating them is one thing, but being in love with them? That's not... that's not right. That's not how this was meant to go. How could he be in love with them? It made no sense.

No. No, it does make sense.

What doesn't make sense is how it had taken him so long to notice. The Puppeteer prides himself on being in control of his emotions. He has to be. If he can't control something as simple as emotions, then that makes him weak. So what happened? Why didn't he notice he was falling in love? Why did he allow himself to feel this way? And who else has noticed?

Emra clearly has, though he supposes he can't be too upset about her being able to read him like a book.

Has Zachary noticed?

It's safe to say he probably hasn't. He'd use it against the Puppeteer, no doubt. Be it a way to get on his nerves, or as a potential weapon against him.

Fuck.

If anyone outside of those two finds out that he's in love, it could spell trouble not only for him but for [Y/n] as well.

…

…

Well, what the hell is he supposed to do now?

What does anyone do after they realize they're in love? He can hardly remember his life as Jonathan, he doesn't want to, so he isn't sure what he did when he realized he was in love with Emra. Logically, he probably told her, right?

But that was then, and this is now. He's no longer the person he once was. I mean, he's dead now, for starters.

So, instead of thinking about how he would've reacted in the past... what would The Puppeteer do in the now?

Well, realistically, he'd bottle these emotions up and push them to the side. But he doesn't want to do that to [Y/n]. The thought of distancing himself from them made his chest ache, to be honest. Which is... odd, considering.

The uncertainty of these emotions lingers with him throughout the night, and they stick with him in the morning as well.

He avoided Emra like she was a disease, pretending she didn't even exist as he came to terms with the inner turmoil inside of him. He felt a little guilty, seeing the despondent expression on her face, but he could always make it up to her later. Maybe.

Zachary certainly didn't miss the way he seemed to be caught up in his thoughts, but he ignored any remarks thrown his way in favor of sorting through the storm of his mind.

Seriously... what the hell should he do?

"Don't you think you're asking the wrong person for advice?" Helen's voice cuts him out of his thoughts, and The Puppeteer lets out a small huff of annoyance as he floats next to his friend, watching him paint with a bored expression.

"Who else is there to ask?"

"Have you maybe considered Jane? Or Nina?"

His face scrunches up slightly at the mere mention of Nina's name, and there was no way in hell he was going to go to Jane for relationship advice. She'd probably... skin him alive or something. If he were still alive, that is. Knowing Jane, she'd still figure out something. She's... scary like that.

Helen just shakes his head and sends The Puppeteer off, telling him to figure things out himself. What fun.

So, that's how The Puppeteer finds himself here in his workshop, mindlessly tapping his desk and staring blankly at the wall, too caught up in his own thoughts to be aware of his surroundings.

"—ello? Hello?"

He's dragged out of his thoughts by the sound of someone speaking, and he blinks at the sight of someone waving their hand in front of his face. A slight sense of annoyance sparked inside of him, but it withered away the moment he realized it was just [Y/n] trying to get his attention.

"You feeling okay? You were pretty zoned out there," [Y/n] says, worry clear in their expression as they rest a hand on his shoulder.

The Puppeteer should brush off their concern, he thinks. There are actually a lot of things he should do.

He should break up with them.

He should feed off their misery.

He should kill them.

He should treat them the way he treats everyone else.

He should.

But he doesn't.

He can't.

With all the thoughts clouding his mind and the emotions he thought to be long dead burning in his chest, he really isn't fit for conversation. Who knows what he might end up saying? It could lead to something—

"I love you."

—that it shouldn't lead to.

Well fuck.

[Y/n] was certainly caught off guard by the confession as well, seeing as they pulled their hand away from them from the sheer force of shock. He supposes he can understand why they're shocked. He doesn't say stuff like this. He's never told them that he loved them.

Their silence only served to make him more antsy than he already was, and he cleared his throat, "Right, well, I'm busy, so you need to–"

The Puppeteer's words were cut off as [Y/n] put their hand on the back of his neck and pressed their lips against his own. It was certainly an effective way to shut him up, that's for sure.

He didn't even get a chance to kiss back before they were pulling away, so very obviously flustered by their own actions as they stumble over their words for a moment.

"I love you too." They finally manage to say, trying and failing to suppress the little smile forming on their oh so beautiful face.

And oh. Oh.

"I'm never going to be able to let you go now..." He mumbles, trying to force back his own smile as he pulls them down for another quick kiss.

He really is in love.

[k-s-morgan]

I have another question. Why does Will Graham prefer to kill other killers like himself? I keep thinking about Chilton's assent of him in season 2 where he states that "Will Graham likes to play God. He catches these killers simply to prove he is smarter then them." I think he has a good point, given that Graham is deeply insecure and is a bit of a narcissist. If that's the case then do you think maybe that's the reason why he kept lying to Hannibal in season 2? Albeit I'm sure he was pissed about Abigails death but as you've pointed out he only liked the idea of her. So if that's the case then maybe it was him trying to prove he was better then Hannibal. If so is that why he also prefers killing killers? To prove he's better then them or is it some deeper reason? That he hates them because he hates himself? What are your thoughts?

I think you made an excellent point about Chilton's words. I always found it amusing and fascinating how despite the fact that Chilton is completely wrong in his accusations against Will during the trial, he actually presents a surprisingly accurate profile of him. He's extremely wrong and extremely right at the same time, particularly with this: "Will Graham has never been diagnosed. He won't allow anyone to test him. He has carefully constructed a persona to hide his real nature from the world. He wears it so well, even Jack Crawford couldn't see past it."

With Will being motivated to outsmart killers: I think it makes a lot of sense and it could be another amazing detail in his portrayal, although I don't think it was really shown. It could be something existing deep inside him that might come to the surface after he settles into his new life with Hannibal. The only time Will seemed competitive to me was when he was being possessive over Hannibal's attention - he wanted to hold his admiration and focus instead of seeing him single out other killers.

For the most part, I think Will prefers to kill killers because it makes him feel better about himself. He knows he has darkness inside, but he also longs to be a normal, moral person. Being able to excuse some of his impulses helps lessen his self-hatred. I don't think he cares about innocent people per se - he's shown as careless and cold with them on more than one occasion. In S3, he downright stages the murders of quite a few of them (Chiyoh and her tortured prisoner who might or might not be guilty, Chilton and FBI officers; possibly Bedelia, whose actual crimes are far lesser than Will's). Will seems genuinely caring only with those he can relate to, like Peter, Georgia, Reba, and murder-children. But he still has enough morality to understand that he doesn't like liking what he does, so killing bad people is a compensation and a more acceptable solution to his inner conflict.

Regarding S2, Hannibal, and Abigail: I think Will's biggest problem was the feeling of personal betrayal, rage over this, and a lack of comprehension of how Hannibal could have killed Abigail when he claimed to care about her + the fear of what it means for Will personally. Why was Hannibal so cruel about it - Abigail was killed sadistically, he cut off her ear and implanted it in Will? How can Will trust that such a person loves him when this is what he did to a girl he supposedly treasured? If Hannibal is a monster whose love is fleeting and superficial, Will doesn't want it - he wants revenge. But if there is something more to it, then Will might change his mind. We see his inner struggle in this dream conversation:

Will: I want an admission. Admit what you are.

Dream Hannibal: Why not appeal to my better nature?

Will: I wasn’t aware you had one.

Will is in denial. He wants Hannibal to confirm to him that he’s a monster and thus not worthy of Will’s attention - Will is trying to literally torture the answer he wants out of him, yet despite his best effort, Hannibal responds with love. This frustrates and confuses him even more. Like Will said to Peter, killing is much easier when you know how to feel. And Will doesn’t know how to feel about Hannibal, not until he finds a way to label him as a hollow monster. So he's torn about it and about his feelings up until Mizumono, where he finally makes his choice.

[phoenixinthefiles]

Not to pry but are there any more flowerbyte scenarios or storyline you would like to explore in the future?

🤭🤭 You’re not prying at all, you don’t know how massive the grin was that spread across my face when I saw this ask.

Margo and Miles are so near and dear to me; I can’t explain it further than me just really connecting with them.

I just find them so relatable.

Anyway, in terms of actual storylines and scenarios, I’d really like to explore their dynamic in terms of their inner conflicts and how they mentally gauge things.

I wanna explore everything about my headcanon about Margo’s slight derealization, (still don’t know if that’s the correct term) and how exactly she navigates being at the Spider Society and interacting with the Spider-people around her-especially Miles.

I mean we all saw that spark between them and the way they looked at each other, you can’t tell me that Margo’s mind wasn’t shocked out of her body when that happened.

She connected with someone, someone she just met and not in a “oh we’re both spider-teens” kinda way. They connected in an insanely deep way that we didn’t get to see and I can’t imagine how game changing that would be for Margo.(well I can actually, which is why I’m writing about it)

I just think that when they got that ZAP! It kinda delivered a shock to Margo’s own nervous system, beyond the hologram.

This wasn’t Spider-Man and Spiderbyte, it was Margo and Miles.

She actually felt something beyond the virtual reality and the Spider society. She wouldn’t be able to just ignore that. It occupies her brain everytime she sees him, and even when she doesn’t see him.

And with Miles I really wanna get into how it’s kinda implied slightly (very slightly) that wants to go into physics so he can find Gwen and Peter again.

His immediate thought about the Spider Society is getting a watch so he can see these people he relates too more often.

And then he meets Margo.

And he experiences that same Zap! (It was more of a Ziing!) that he felt when saw the Peter from his dimension.

He definitely made that connection. And after feeling betrayed by two people he wanted to see most, I feel like the fact that he just met someone and felt that sense in his head go off…

He’d feel something deeper for Margo.

And let’s not forget her helping him out like we all saw that loaded eye contact.

This was so long I apologize 😭😭😭

TLDR: I wanna take that initial connection they had and sink my hands into it, and expound upon it every way until I get them out of my head.

[shamrock313]

Evan and Nat (Aug 3rd)

This reading is for entertainment purposes only. Please take everything you read with a grain of salt. Enjoy!

Please note that the cards change all the time. Sometimes we get good and other times we get a mix. I had an anon ask me if I think these two are becoming serious and I think it is.

I would like to mention that I got some oracle cards and they will be added to this reading. So, I will have them down as OC in the reading.

Nat POV: 8 of Wands (rev), Wheel of Fortune, Devil, and 10 of Swords = There's misunderstanding and confusion. She shouldn't push this relationship. Needs to be patient. Relationship is changing / navigating the change within the relationship. This could be about them moving in together or taking the next step into their relationship. Making adjustments. Codependency. She's addicted to Evan. They have chemistry, but there are dark undercurrents to this relationship.

Breakup, sadness, grief, infidelity. Once again, she's trying to make this relationship work. She doesn't want to leave. Picture her holding onto the door as someone tries to pull her out.

OC: Pros: Connection, interested, moving in. Cons: Using you, Boundaries, Pretending, Hookup. OC #2: Spy and Gold Digger. I think with spy it means she's either observing how the fans are checking on her or she knows we're watching which I mean come on who isn't? Gold Digger could mean what we think it means or this is helping her grow in her career or he's helping her financially.

Evan POV: 10 of Wands (rev), 9 of Cups (rev), and Ace of Cups (rev) = Failure to share burdens. Partner wants to be an emotional support to him. Doesn't want to hurt or tell her his worries. Holding in pain causes him to become emotionally distant. Superficial relationship. Looks great on paper, she checks the boxes but something is missing. Lack of deeper connection? Only putting himself in the relationship to avoid working on himself. Sadness, separation, vulnerability, insecurity in love. Afraid to open up.

OC: Pros: Dreamy, Lovestruck, Swipe Right, I'm Ready. Cons: Ghosted and Immature. OC #2 Caution and Gambling. I think with gambling this is talking about addiction issues and financial issues so again he might be helping her or this could imply something else. Caution of course is a warning.

Overall Dynamic: 2 of Swords, Moon (rev), 5 of Cups, Magician (rev), and King of Swords (rev) = Choosing between love, work, and family. Trying to resolve issues. Someone doesn't want to address issues (most likely Evan) and it's piling up. Uncertainty about relationship. Avoiding the red flags. Deception, fear, and paranoia in love. Keep hearing "I don't wanna start over" (this is Evan). A man who is emotionally immature. Manipulation?

2oS along with 5oC indicates disappointment, inner conflicts toward someone. Someone is torn between two choices and they are grieving about it. In their mind they have to choose one or the other. 5 of Cups is also about being nostalgic. Not looking at what is around them. Avoiding it.

SLOW DOWN

Someone is refusing to accept the truth or being blindfolded by choice. Again, this is them trying to avoid the issues that are there. Both partners need to start being HONEST and open up to each other's about one's feelings towards the other. Miscommunication. Beating around the bush. A relationship that is not as it seems to public, unbalance, physical attraction, and lack of emotional support.

OC: Moving in (I think we can confirm that they are living together. This has come out too many times. If I'm wrong, I accept that but it keeps coming up). Honeymoon aka the Honeymoon phase is either still active or over and they're starting to see each other as who they really are. Chances of traveling to a wedding together? Probably not a wedding maybe it's another event or vacation. Someone is traveling soon. Open your heart.