#but idk if thats the right takeaway

[mushroom-through-the-stargate]

i have Strong Feelings and want to know if they are mutual Strong Feelings or if im just being sensitive

*extremely biased trope explanation under the cut

you have a Robot Friend. Robot Friend says they cannot feel, but very clearly through their actions is stuffed with love and only says they cannot feel bc they actually cant PROCESS what theyre feeling. some scientist comes along with an Upgrade that is honestly kinda pushed onto Robot Friend, and now Robot Friend can show emotion in a traditional way but its very clearly overstimulating for Robot Friend. something goes wrong and everyone accepts that Robot Friend has to go back to the way they were (which doesnt affect their many friendships with the crew!!!!) but because of this glimpse of Traditionally Expressive Friend everyone either feels like they were cheated out of something or (correct response) they translate this as Robot Friend still loving them and having loved them this entire time in their own way

[3416]

I think what gets to me the most about people talking crap about the players after a loss is like.. losing sucks, especially when a team doesn’t play their best, of course it does, but I get over that bit essentially as soon as I turn off the game. What makes losing really suck and what sticks with me is that I get all overly sympathetic and sad eyed about how the players must feel after losing. So saying mean stuff about the players??? Baffling. You can’t be mean to the babies???? They need hugs and love and everything good.

no exactly......... like my frustration comes from knowing they can be better and do better but ultimately... it's still like THEIR success as people that i'm rooting for?? like i want them to win the stanley cup bc i want them to get to be happy bc i enjoy them as people.... not bc of some self righteous reason like i picked a team and get to point at everyone else and say i'm better than you like. maybe i DO get the hate for mainstream leafs fans in a way bc LMFOA. the biggest overreactions and the most entitled bunch for stanning a team with such a long drought. idk where it comes from in people's ideas of sport... like they're owed something by this team they're willingly choosing to spend time and money on but. i want the leafs to win bc i've gotten attached to a bunch of goofy guys and wanna see them happy and fill up my free time w my little thoughts about them. can't fathom my brain ever flipping a switch where i suddenly NEED this team to win to prove something about myself or my self worth the way a whole bunch of ppl on twitter seem to. i really don't get it but i'm here for the narratives and the storytelling of the thing lmao

[rowanhoney]

Man Americans weird me out so much

[mystmarten]

not saying barbie isn't a feminist movie bc I've not seen it so I can't say but like. all I've seen people say about it in like casual discussion is "girls can like the colour pink" and I just don't know if that's a good takeaway from a supposedly feminist film

[carmenlire]

if I can be honest lol I feel like shit and lowkey like everyone hates me because I'm so annoying:/

[zaradoth]

i've beaten him on all ng+ cycles with so many different builds by now and my main takeaway is that his design isn't fundamentally flawed(like the elden beast's is) but the fight is full of things that make it hard to like unless you really ignore a lot of the glaring flaws because you want to like it my main two problems are his triple slash and the clone attacks/light nuke the first might be bugged but it hasn't been fixed yet so im starting to doubt that its intentional for it to be near undodgable on a med roll, barely dodgable on a light unless you hug his right leg the ENTIRE fight and easily dodgable on a fat roll fsr i know the backstep talisman counters it but thats not a fix to the problem, nothing indicates you should use it and you shouldnt be forced to and i know it got nerfed too but idk if it still works for that attack as for the light and clone attacks horrible performance the fps drops are insane they could've toned it down a bit and have failed to fix the problem in patches so far its a fight where you're constantly afraid of a certain move being used like with malenia's waterfowl and flower clones except those moves have a thousand different ways to avoid them, the cross slash just needs you to do very specific things to avoid a seemingly random move and if you dont then you're getting hit i wouldn't have too much problem if this was a vigor check like a grab or smth but it's a move that will most likely hit you so if he does it when you're low then you're most likely screwed

his poise gimmick would be more acceptable if he wasn't plagued by these other problems too but he is

so its just a really buggy fight against a guy with a near undodgable move he can use whenever while tanking your performance, all the while having as much poise as godfrey while recovering it as quickly as a low poise boss like malenia

i like radahn despite the flaws but the flaws ARE there and they're genuinely unacceptable

i don't understand how these haven't been fixed in patches yet

[sneezemonster15]

I have several questions in just one ask for you.

I think sakura is a fujoshi too lmao did u see her reaction to the boy on boy action? Idk about hinata, but as u said she n sakura forced sasuke and naruto to marry them, even though hinata knows too little of naruto to know hes gay.

naruto and sasuke love each other,there was no one around in sasukes confession, why not say, hey i like you in 'that' way, usuratonkachi? Just confessing, no need to start dating yknow.

There are lots of gay portrayals in shounen now, it wasnt there b4. So kishi couldve let it out anyway right? In interviews and all, but no he has to label them as more bros than blood bros, spitting on the subtle purpose of his story, making his audience get it wrong. Whats the point of writing a love story when hes giving gods word that it is a story about two brothers?

Why WHY did he have to make them reincarnated brothers?

thats all, have a good day sneeze! Sorry if i loaded u up, but i see longer asks sent to u, so it wont be a problem right?

Hi. Hope you have a good day as well. Long ask isn't a problem.

1) Sakura is not a fujoshi, just a hormonal boy crazy girl. I have talked about it here.

2) It's not really a confession, it's Sasuke's thoughts. It doesn't matter whether anyone was around Sasuke's confession. Because the point was that Kishi could not have made his main characters confess their love explicitly in the manga. But it doesn't matter, because he did so much else. SO MUCH. And that is enough. Anyway, the ending was supposed to be tragic so as to facilitate the story line of Boruto, as in with the new generation kids. Naruto and Sasuke were never supposed to end together once Boruto went on board. If it weren't for Boruto, it would have been open ended, and the takeaway/impression would have certainly been that they did end up together. So you can take some comfort in that, but if you can't, I will understand.

3) Most people feel miserly about that one interview where Kishimoto called them blood brothers. But ignore the nuance of the whole piece.

Look how much he is struggling to explain their relationship. The interviewer was being quite assertive about getting his answer too. I am telling you, Kishi was sweating balls here. He couldn't have revealed the actual nature of their bond, and like I said, a lot of people can tell what the story was about. Like this interviewer. Who is being cautious but smart. Kishi is talking about loneliness and abandonment. Both Naruto and Sasuke suffered from it. Kishi finds it hard to put in words but he is trying to explain the underlying feeling of it anyway. It's not hard to see.

Look at this. Don't you find it weird that there is SO damn much conversation around defining this relationship? It's there in the manga in a major way and it's there in the interviews because that's what the manga is about. Kishi is explaining how some bonds are taken for granted because they already have quite a strong impression in the intuitive memory of the audience. Like bonds of family. Like Sasuke and Itachi. You can tell in a story who is family. But the bond between Naruto and Sasuke is hard to explain no? Even Sasuke wants to know the answer! Lol. And he gets it, in the end. Friendship is hard to explain, he says. And yet a lot of characters were pointedly portrayed as friends. Like Shikamaru and Chouji. Properly emphatically friends. Kakashi and Obito. Jiraiya and Tsunade, Inoichi and Shikaku, Lee and Neji, Ino, Shikamaru and Chouji.

All FRIENDS. And we got it very easily too. What he found difficult to explain was the 'friendship' between Naruto and Sasuke. Naruto keeps calling him friend. But obviously, Sasuke isn't satisfied. Again, until the end. Like the audience can obviously tell that when Naruto goes absolutely berserk at the mere name of Sasuke, or that Sasuke gives up his life for a person he didn't even like apparently, yeah that stuff is beyond friendship. Audience isn't dumb. Well not all.

One doesn't really have to go interview hunting to find the veracity of Naruto and Sasuke's love. It's all in the manga. It's the real source. But if you have to refer to the interviews, don't ignore the rest of them.

Everything depends on how Kishi is able to put their relationship into words. Hmm. He did. He didn't have to make them say 'I love you, let's date'. He made them say different words that were much more significant, that made more sense with them, that matched the quality, nuance and emotional heights of their love. Kishi does stress on the importance of words and communication though. I have talked about it here.

Love triangle? Yes, in team seven. Both Naruto and Sakura like Sasuke romantically. Naruto experienced love and became an adult, he surely did. Thanks to Sasuke. It was his memory and Naruto's feelings for him that goaded him to become stronger and more mature and determined af. It isn't a coincidence vote two was right after it was revealed that it was Naruto's seventeenth birthday, he has literally and metaphorically come of age. And then he tells Sasuke again how much he loves him, how he really truly felt about him. In chapter 698. And Sasuke concedes, he is finally at peace, now that he has heard it from Naruto's own mouth. It was important for him to know these 'words'. Words are what gave him his resolution. Naruto's words that he couldn't very well say before.

Kishi was writing this story at a time when it was not acceptable in shounen to have major gay characters. I don't think that's the case today either. Although what we do know is that Naruto anime did try to hetishize Naruto and tried to distract from many sus scenes by adding non canon stuff to it. From Wiki.

Especially not the MC. Naruto is supposedly the first shounen MC to have kissed another boy on the mouth. In canon. This was written under the facade of comedy, as a lot of scenes were especially with Naruto, Kishi had to find a way to create smokescreens and red herrings so as not to get caught red handed. It's not an easy job for the writer to do this and make it believable and effective and so impactful. The average shounen consumer was happy with it, those who looked for a fuller and more layered approach, and complexity in their media also loved it. There was something for everyone in it. This was no easy feat. This takes real talent. And kishi was motivated to do it and how. And he did it too. But it wasn't smooth as butter. He had to fight his editors several times on multiple scenes. Like the reverse oiroke jutsu you are talking about. Very sus, wasn't it? It was meant to be. Or the fight at the vote two. He didn't compromise with his story to the best of his ability. But imagine the pressure he was under. We need to dig a little deeper. It's never that black and white. If it was that bad, then it is safe to assume that Kishi didn't feel comfortable revealing the nature of their relationship explicitly. A lot of artists have gotten canceled or blacklisted for less. Plus, if the gay tones were so overt, the anime would have faced difficulties getting distributed in other countries, mainly North America, because of their syndication rules. From Wiki.

And I have a feeling that Kishi was also reticent because of his own orientation. There has been much debate on this. But I strongly suspect that Kishi relates with Naruto's character. He has said it himself that he sees himself in Naruto. Naruto is his projection, self insert. And Sasuke is his muse, the classic archetypical, dreamy, beautiful but deadly bishounen, that everyone desires, including men. Like Sasuke has been clearly depicted. And I think Kishi is in a similar predicament as Naruto.

4) Naruto and Sasuke are not reincarnated brothers. It's their chakra. That doesn't make them brothers. How exactly does that make them brothers? Where does Kishi make anyone say it or imply it? Madara and Hashirama also had Ashura's and Indra's chakras but people are okay with calling them gay for each other. They were also given very homoerotic scenes. Just like Sasuke and Naruto. But the same people who deny SNS ship Hashimada lol. Unfair, isn't it? They have the special chakras because they are the fated saviours of their world. That reincarnated chakras make them brothers, though is already a ridiculous argument, in no universe cancels out the rest of the story. That's not how it works. The point is Sasuke and Naruto were written as main act of the story. This was the main act, vote two. You know which other thing has a main act just like Shippuden? This.

A double suicide narrative was already in the making, and then Kishi makes sure that his main act is the same as the main act of Chikamatsu's shinjuu plays. Chikamatsu is considered as one the greatest, most prolific playrights Japan has ever produced. His work is pretty much a part of the cultural and literary imagination of Japan. Kishi wanted to pay homage to him, like many other modern Japanese creators.

The main act comes at the end, led by everything that has happened before. The hero and heroine have already tried everything else. But in the main act, they die together after the most profoundly emotional interaction/depiction that rends your heart. Although, in Kishi case, they think they are dead, but they aren't. They live. Kishi had already thought of this ending panel by panel and line by line many years before chapter 698 was published. Hehe. Writers are serious about these things, they have to be isn't it? It's their job. Anyway, that's how crazy this man is. And I love him for it. Don't underestimate him. He did a lot for fans. He is a wonderful artist. He had to give up at the end. And it sucks. But he did his best.

Hopefully this answers your questions.

[shamelessobjectglitter]

conchigile-62kcal

salad-14kcal

spring onion-3kcal

lettuce-3kcal

ham-54kcal

cucumber-8kcal

mayo-36kcal

baguette-283kcal

strawberries-3kcal

apple-46kcal

frozen pineapple-50kcal

---------------

walking=137kcal

sit-ups=800kcal

presents went well, she loved the water bottle because it "showed i listened" idk, she's brought it up loads before so i just found the one thats easiest to open and also wont spill all down her. I had to eavesdrop so i could give her presents because no one tells me shit

the volume button on my phone is fucking stiff, i keep accidentally muting then putting it on max volume, im considering using the accessibility settings so i can stop using the button

i almost stabbed myself in the chest because i forgot i was holding a knife and when i went to lift the chopping board and needed two hands i decided to put the knife between my arm and chest in the most awkward way possible, i only realised when it started to hurt, any sharper and id probably have actually hurt myself, idk what was wrong, i was fine then went downstairs to cut fruit and all of a sudden i forgot what i was doing every 2 seconds and ended up doing stupid shit or standing there wondering why i was in the kitchen when I'd just cut and weighed strawberries. Maybe its just because im tired, or maybe its because my brain has stopped working right, it didn't work right to begin with but my memory wipes (idk what else to call them) normally dont happen over and over in the span of minutes, i was fine after too, but maybe thats because the tasks didn't need to be done sequentially, i was still getting distracted easily and forgetting what i was doing, but because i immediately saw a new task it didn't register, idk if that makes sense. Its been happening a lot lately where I'll forget something as soon as I've done it, I'll think of something then immediately wont be able to remember what it was. idk maybe I'm overreacting and its not that bad

i think i ate something off today, i feel like im going to throw up. I got out of eating both ice cream and takeaway today

My lower back is covered in friction burns from the situps, idk what to do about it, im hoping it'll just go away eventually without me having to stop

[cutemeat]

would u care to expand on the intersex dennis hc? never seen that before and it intrigues me. please!

ofc!

ok so it started off pretty silly n broad LOL like in s15 they talk abt the colors Yellow and Purple (colors of the intersex flag) and Dennis’ plaid shirt in Still in Ireland reminded me of a character who is trans (but lies and says he’s intersex) in Boys Don’t Cry and Dennis’ obsession with redheads reminded me of how a common statistic (and i’ve seen this claim be disputed but i’m not here to get into that lol) used for promoting intersex awareness/acceptance is that “it’s as common as people with red hair!” … so it stuck out to me that dennis was so interested in redheads as “a genetic mutation thing”…

it also just adds a sort of deeper layer to Dennis staying closeted/distance from Mac (esp since Dennis in an ep like Misses the Boat assumes Mac has a genital preference: “does she have a dick?” and Mac displays his “distaste” for vaginas in Bathroom Problem which Dennis says makes him uncomfortable) and also his own self-image issues and his fixation with masculinity. And also adds an extra layer to his arc in “Right to Chop”… and to his sensitivity to the “baby dick” comment or “dickless dennis” joke.

this HC also extends into an interpretation of Misses the Boat where the reason Mac talks about milking a girls adrenal gland is cuz Dennis tries to explain his condition to Mac (also a way to interpret Dennis getting frustrated/annoyed by one of the buyer’s line of questioning in the ep) but he gets annoyed by Mac’s lack of grasp so he gives up and Mac is just more confused and his takeaway is just the adrenal gland stuff (cuz the more specific intersex condition I hc dennis as having is congenital adrenal hyperplasia)..

idk, the whole thing started as a batshit theory when i was like. really manic LOL but now it’s just a hc that I still hold onto cuz like. yeah thats my dennis thats how i see him lol

[autumnwyvern]

unfortunately like idk i dont want to be the one to break the news to some of yall but like. there is no where you can post publicly that won't get scraped by something at some point. its not even like a ooh evil greedy social media company thing its like. they scrape google results we know for a fact that feeding a generative AI program someone's art in specific is being used as a revenge tactic and if you piss off someone who does that only having your art on a personal little website isn't going to be able to prevent that.

However I don't want your takeaway from this to be "oh no i have to leave the internet and never post anything ever again" the cat is like fully out of the bag and has been for a while. we need to learn to adapt to the cat. and yeah the cat will evolve and adapt to what we do as well, thats just kind of how technology works. It will probably suck but like in the same way that dealing with art theft/reposting in general sucks. Being an artist online has always had its own set of specific challenges and this is just another one of them now. You gotta roll with the punches.

oh and for the love of all that is good in the world STOP trying to make things a copyright issue. Make it a privacy issue. a data rights issue. an issue of impersonation. but if copyright gets any more strict than it already is I will become a huge beast and gnaw on those who advocated for it like a chew toy

[urie]

anyway ada limoń's poem says nothing like "men dont do nice things for you or show their love for you" thats nowhere in it lol how on earth is that your takeaway

maybe im sensitive right now because this is how my dad is like and now hes the only parent i have and i watch the little things he does in my moms memory without thinking about it

not to say "man-hating has gone too far" because lol, but we cant even discuss the way men stunt their emotions from a young age because of pressures to "be a man" and sometimes the way love manifests is quiet and unspoken. my dad used to be laughed at at best or beaten at worse when he showed emotion like that, even love. so it manifests differently. it has to. idk

[elytrafemme]

sooofuckging sleepy. called the sister though.hopefully im productive tmrw (little more so than today haha ) and feel better and schedule a hang out with friends i think socializing would be good for me. though all  i want to do right now is cuddle up iin bed eat pita bread and watch videos. i think i should get some sun and see some people. mood is weird but we live through it and at least for me the cool thing about having really unpredictable episodes / mood swings is that u know u’ll always feel better at some point (pessimist or realist could argue that youd also feel worse later but well i dont think we have to see it like that always) . too exhasuted to do proper hygeine things which kind of sucks but i think its okay 

my takeaway for today : overly simplify your pronouns when trying to coordinate someone writing you a bio so you dont get listed as having 3 different sets at once , and also know that u wont feel this awful forever. ive done some pretty impulsive things thinking that feeling would last for forever and yeah sometimes it lasts several months and stuff but it does eventually stop. u will be happy u carried on pinky promise. 

anyway. idk. sometimes u experience things consistently and sometimes issues come back like one of my more recurring (as in it goes super dormant and then comes back up full force rinse and repeat) issues is in its prime rn and its made things difficult but. we get thru it 

we find other consistencies. like idk i think enjoying sunlight is pretty consistent bc u know it comes back. enjoying stars too. nature is good to connect with because as a whole we don’t ever really lose it. people too though i mean my relatiosnhips historically havent been the best but having friends and stuff and just loving things, thats good too. even when love oscillates its the kind of inconsistency thats a little good for the soul . also i think love is like energy in which it gets conserved and you cant create or destroy it you just have this love u pass around . kinda

this is rambly but im exhausted and my leg is numb and im too tired to really take care of myself tn but thats ok bc ill take care of myself tmrw. someday ill look back at this and go damn i wish i knew how much better things would be

love u guys. GN 

[lost-butterfliies]

Didnt wanna add that to the posts i just rb'ed but i remember getting my first periods and like

I was 10yo i think and i never had sex ed before (which i dont blame on anyone, my period was rather early (am doing a quick google and yeah 10 is a normal age but the average is around 12-13)), and as far as i can say i didnt have much symptoms besides the bleeding (i cannot remember having any & if i did have them i did not link them w the bleeding) so i was like. Mh did i injure myself? Do i have a Problem? Nah lets just Hide It as best i can, i.e. not very well, which was Good cus then my mum noticed and was like oh yeah thats normal i can give you pads :) (i think i wouldve enjoyed some biology at the time to actually explain what was going on but it was my mum, shes bad at sciences and can be old fashioned, she couldnt have explained it and she probably wouldnt have been comfortable doing so (she might be better at it now that she has three or four (just realizing idk if the youngest (11yo) has had her first period yet, i feel like a bad brother now) kids who have/had periods (T stops my period but if i am late for doing my shot it sometimes starts again so thats fun 🙃) (and yeah fun fact my first period was a few years? before my older sister got hers, and i remember her finding bloody underwear of mine and going "whaaaat [alex] did you shit yourself" bc she didnt know about it either i guess and it was extremely awkward ngl :')))))

And like why did child me think her best option was to pretend everything was okay? Esp considering that mysterious blood usually is BAD, like i didnt know it was a normal thing that happens to half the world population, it should have rung the alarm bells of "well maybe there is something very very bad happening and you should ask your parents and go to the doctor*" (*going to the doctor wouldnt have happened cus. Its a fucking period my parents would have explained. But if it had been some other blood incident seeing a doctor wouldve been the right move)

And like idk what my takeaway is with this story. Idk what pushed me to hide it, idk if it was my parents, idk if it was because it seemed intimate (not sure its the best word but whatever), idk if i truly thought it was benign and that it would get better if i ignored it and suffered through it so it wasn't worth pointing out (honestly you can probably psychoanalyze the hell outta me just with this part). All i know is i wish it had been different bc baby me deserved better she deserved love and attention and everything else

[sentientgopro]

Okay, so I know this might sound odd, but I kinda want to keep track of how my feelings have been changing seeing as my life just turned upside down a few days ago. Something feels weird about keeping a note to myself, idk why, For some reason I feel kore comfortable posting it to the internet. Well, I guess that is kinda the point of a blog? Anyway, if youre seeing this but not my last post on Monday, I think I cracked on Sunday Night.

That first post was comprised of how I was feeling Sunday Night- Monday Morning (10/11 Dec) and, well, I'm not going to repeat it. Monday was... weird. I didn't feel great, although thats not significantly out of the ordinary, but I was facing a difficult question I would rather not have to answer, especially when the obvious conclusion was such a difficult one to follow through and act on. It was a question Id rather die than face.

Monday evening was when I decided to start truly planning for the possibility. I may not know If Im right yet, and depending on how hard it may be, I was wondering if it was even worth it. Then I had a look at some trans timelines, and asked people about HRT options, and that was what changed my fuckin life. It was then that I saw how real this was and just how possible this was. The realisation that this was on the cards for me (after a 2 year wait) made me feel really fucking good. Like best Ive felt in a long time. Ive been running on fumes, a list of people to outlive, and "My cats would miss me" but this provided a positive reason to keep going, something to look forward to. For the first time in ages, I wanted to Carry On, not just felt like I had to. And this feeling/ realisation also helped in validating my feelings, that Im not just making it up.

And then came tuesday. The best day Ive had in a long time. I've heard people say "Transitioning may not solve all your problems, but it can make them feel worth solving" but I realised I had that in reverse. My problems are affecting my academic success, so to get out this house and get to Uni, I need to start fixing/ overcoming those problems. My problems feel worth solving so that I can get to transition. I got more done that day and focused easier than I have in a long time.

Later into Tuesday, I considered what my future could look like now. How might it affect other parts about me? I considered my Aroace identity, might it affect that? And I quickly realised I might not be Aro. Why could I see myself happily in a relationship in the future, as a girl, but not as a guy? Hell, I took the idea out of relationships, and realised I couldn't see a happy future at all as a guy. Ive known this for a while, and kinda brushed it off as "Modern society sucks ass" and "Who knows what the future holds" and shit like that, but if that was the case, I wouldnt see a happy future as a girl, which I do. This was another big help in feeling that Im not mistaken about my feelings, and also helps to explain why Ive always felt a little conflicted on my Aromanticism, because it wasn't. As for now, until I can transition, the label still fits. I still think Ill be Ace either way, but I cant know that until the time comes. It doesnt really matter, those labels can be pretty fluid, I shouldnt stress over it. The key takeaway here was that it seemed that Dysphoria was stopping me from wanting a relationship. Perhaps I was wrong about not feeling dysphoria, I think i might just have not been noticing it or understanding it.

I'm caught up to today, which hasn't really seen major developments. I acknowledged the fact that Ive been kinda subconsciously viewing myself as more feminine for years now, but I dont feel like that thought significantly leads anywhere beyond reinforcing how I feel. Most of my thought on this went towards music and lyrics, as now I have a whole new dimension of meanings to find in songs, completely changing how I see alot of them. For example, one song, that I havent been able to find any meaning to until now, has these lines across 2 different verses:

"I need time to break all the mirrors,

But my mind is in pieces and not ready to make it clearer,"

and

"Time to make it all clearer,

And if time never ceases I'll be ready to break the mirror"

After a quick google, the idea of "Breaking a mirror" means bad luck for years, before being okay, which can be interpreted to have fairly heavy parallels to a transition. The first version talks about needing to go through this period, but not being able to or not being ready. As much as I say I cant transition bc of living eith my controlling and transphobic parents, I also know I would not be ready to do it if that wasnt the case. But, as in the second version of these two lines, once I can make it all clearer, If I can just hold out until the end of the two years, if time keeps passing, I can break the mirror.

There are other parts of this song I like and find (questionable) trans meanings in, but these parts stand out. Song is "The Gift" by Kevin Sherwood and Elena Siegman for anyone wondering, I'd best describe it as Melodic heavy metal, heavy instrumentals courtesy of Kevin and beautiful vocal melody courtesy of Elena.

So that was pretty much my day today, finding little bits of meaning in various songs I already listen to. Although its only 2:30PM, there may be more to come later. Regardless, now that ive caught up, Im just going to be keeping every post as its own individual thought or topic. If you did actually read through this, thanks I guess? I dont know why I feel more comfortable writing this here than a private note. Ill only tag this with 196 because eh, why tf not.

[winderlylandchime]

1/2 5x05, i am not ready for all hell to break lose and for my brother to start getting heartbroken. He literally started the ep by saying he needs to see more Britin than Ben/Mikey, not knowing that this is the beginning of hell. Episode opens with the security letting Justin into the club ‘MR TAYLOR! Boyfriend privileges! I missed Emy and Blondie. SECOND WELCOME MISTER TAYLOR! I know for a fact that Brian told them about him and was all be nice to my man! He called Justin cause he has a surprise for him and he gave him MEN! I fucking love these two as a couple, they are literally the same person but different font’ ‘this fucking baby is being passed around like a ball. What the fuck is wrong with them? HUNTER CANT SWIM ANYMORE? Fuck them all. (Mike tells hunter to either be bitter or move on) OH THATS FUCKING RICH COMING FROM HIM. Look its Brian! I still hate that car. Why the fuck is Hunter rude to him? Oh shit, Brian and Mike are like actually drifting apart’ and Brian is at the doctor now ‘PLEASE DONT TELL ME ITS CANCER AGAIN. Wait whats up with the cancer story now? Did they forget? SYPHILIS? Well fuck, he’s probably gonna shut down half of liberty avenue cause of this.’ And now we are the scene where Hunter is back in school ‘i fucking hate this shit. I wanna hit every kid on the screen right now. I do like Callie though, she’s a sweetie. Her parents suck tho’ ‘okay, i LOVE Ted and Brian as friends but my first love is Emmett and Ted. But also i’d sacrifice you for Emmett and Brian’ *looks at me and nods his head*. Annnnd we are at Britin scene where he tells him about the std ‘look at Justin cooking. Suspiciously good? I need to know right now how many times Blondie burnt or fucked up food and Brian ate it to be nice. Why is Blondie so passive aggressive lately? THATS how he tells him about the STD? Calm down Blondie, it happens to the best of us. (Justin says he’s surprised it hasnt happened sooner) *takes a slow huge gasp* what the fuck? THIS EPISODE LITERALLY STARTED WITH JUSTIN AT AN ORGY IN LA? WHY IS HE SUDDENLY SO PRUDISH AND RUDE? *long pause* itd be kinda funny if he got it from Blondie’ This is where I made a mistake to get up and go to the bathroom and all i heard was a yell ‘TED GOT MISTAKEN FOR A LESBIAN! SHE THOUGHT TED WAS A LESBIAN!’ ‘BRIAN! Look at Brian! I don’t really like Ben and Brian together. Its weird. But also why the fuck are they all talking so much about marriage and monogamy lately? But only around Bri? I’m really hating all of this just so you know’ Justin and Daph are now looking after JR ‘DAPHNE! Finally youre back! Blondie thinks about kids? Since when? WHATS STOPPING HIM? Bitch arent yall still like 20? Ask him? But Brian has a kid? ARE WE FORGETTING GUS? Blondie! This is where you say we have gus! Puppy? Why would he get a puppy? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON RIGHT NOW? (Justin tells daphne about syphilis) why the fuck did he say that? What even? *pauses tv and looks at me all confused* WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON? I have no clue whats going on but i know i hate it’ He was pissed off during Hunter’s school meeting but weirdly stayed quiet and then Justin and Daph came back up ‘youd freak out because that would mean cheating BUT HE DIDNT CHEAT AND SHIT HAPPENS. SINCE WHEN DOES DAPHNE CARE ABOUT JUSTINS MONOGAMY? Ha! Blondie knows its never gonna happen because he and Bri Bri dont want that. Fuck this they brought Daphne back just to piss me off. She’d never be like this.’ ‘Now why the fuck is Mel pissed off? HE HAS MORE THAN ONE KID! Can all three of them go fuck each other? This is the second time that Mel acts like Justin is some random dumbass not to be trusted with her kid. He is GUS’s STEP DAD! *puts his arms out in that weird way guys do where they push their arms back but head forward, idk how to describe it im sorry* bitch’ he was so pissed off at mel during this. He said a whole lot of other stuff but it was all over the place so I did my best but the main takeaway was she treated Brian the same way and she doesnt care about Hunter or gus anymore.

My heart is breaking for your brother, for you, for all of us. Fuck you CowLip.

Justin being called Mr Taylor at Babylon is amazing, I love it. DON'T YOU SEE WHAT HE TELLS YOU IN HIS OWN WAY?

But also i’d sacrifice you for Emmett and Brian’ <- tbf I would sacrifice a lot to see more Emmett and Brian.

THIS EPISODE LITERALLY STARTED WITH JUSTIN AT AN ORGY IN LA? WHY IS HE SUDDENLY SO PRUDISH AND RUDE? even louder for the people (Justin, the writers) in the back. And here begins the ultimate betrayal. Where does Brian's growth go? Why does Justin at 22 want a baby and a house and marriage?

AND WHY DOES NO ONE REMEMBER THAT BRIAN HAS A KID (I actually typed that as Gid so there you go) and is really good as a dad?

Fuck this they brought Daphne back just to piss me off. She’d never be like this. It's true. To borrow the meme, she would not fucking say that.

This is the second time that Mel acts like Justin is some random dumbass not to be trusted with her kid. He is GUS’s STEP DAD! YEP

[livecharliereaction]

Bye tsumihoroboshi

thats all for tsumihoroboshi chapter ZAMN. omfg i did cry i cant lie at that big battle on the rooftop i did i did i did.. It just hits a litte close to home friendship and all that... I love my friends so mach i get everything theyre feeling u know... AND the delusions of rena what a crazy writing style i dont think ill get over it like ever. urgh. Well the final tip almost wanted me to consider that "ooh maybe she was right!" but honestly my takeaways from it are juts 1. disaster happens regardless no matter how the events go otherwise 2. rika was murdered? Thats pretty weird 3. BUT theres hope liek she said BECAUSE: keiichi rememberd something from "another world" (i know a timeloop when i see one. its def a timeloop. Hells yeah) 4. the scrapbooks do hvae some evil spell or something takano i am onto you its weird anyway she shows up at such times and all.. Idk if shes the #MAIN VILLAIN DEMON OMG but shes Something.

Rena i love you thank you for solidifying your place as my favorite good time. argh every chapter so far is better than the one before it goes for this one too it does it does... Which is amazing implications for next ones... Lets hope they keep it up...

And keiichi i cant lie i do love you. I love you i love you i love you. Ughh. If i was still 16 hed have a big chance at going to that kinlist. But hes so gross so i wouldnt actually have added him then either!!! im unable to kin these days because EVERY GOOD CHARACTER EVER has Some Traits I Can Relate To Myself becuase i dont know something something human emotion something i am just like everyone else and everyone is just like me in the end and i love it. But yeah keiichi love the guy hes so #Power of Friendship #Protagonist. Im mentioning this cos i loved the girls from the start and still do but keiichi had to prove himself a little...

Yeah im curious about satoko now too i dont think i paid her enough mind i sort of ended up assuming shes #Normal but just super close to rika obviously but that one line about her being older. I couldnt tell yet if its Haha satokos body is older and rikas being funny! OR Omg satoko some immortal or something too woww! but yeah. I wouldnt think she is it doesnt seem that way at all BUT u never know w this fuckass series..ou ou ou ou ou

Mion i love you the girl that you are. Rena you are everything and more. Rika how have you managed to stay mysterious ive been here for like over 30 hours total for sure maybe even 40. But hmm

if its a timeloop i still cant tell what its about. id say rikas in charge (wants to keep giving this world a chance) n takano is with the antagonistic forces But how does it work exactly? If rikas the one "looping the time" directly it doesnt really compute unless she can do it from the afterlife. I dont konw.

And Omfg i hate this series because i STILL believe satoshi will show up one day. Even though it seems impossible now. But i liked him n shion so much dude i love shion so satoshi HAS TO come back for her. Urgh urgh urgh

But yeah i fr didnt think keiichi would be able to break renas delusion even for such a long moment But he pulled it off. Shes really cool i love her. I love her i love her i love her. UGHHH. Everything and more. and i said it alr but ill say it again the portrayal of her delusional state is SO personal to me i get her i get her i DO so good... Urghh. Ok. Thank u charhigurashi6 i have to check how many games the bundle i bought still has hmm

ok these 3 i own but havent installed lets see The first one here is um well i dont know that girl i havent seen her which is concerning! I feel like i mightve seen a sprite (in the og style that i read with) but thats kinda it. I recall seeing a name somewhere too shes a furude i think but not too sure Im always frustrated when i see a spoiler like that but then it never makes me any more knowledgeable about anything so so far its fine #LOL. proably has to do with the demon stuff tho...

takano in the middle one right takano you are so weird and offputting. Damn maybe she IS the big bad afterall

last one aww rika But yeah thats. I dont know its at least 5 hrs each but i think i spent like 10+ hrs on meakashi so it could possibly be up to like what. 15 even 20? per game. At least 15 hours left though.. Idt theres anything outside of the bundle after this its either higu anime time or umineko time ill see what kinda time i have then (i can probably watch the anime while multitasking i dont really care so much but umineko i want to be TUNED. IN.)

yay exciting ok thank u charhigurashi6 best chapter so far loved it love u rena love u everyone ok gn