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yoddream · 4 years

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The Price to Pay | n.jm

pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

summary: when you’re given your dream job, what will happen to you and Jaemin?

warnings: ANGST, bad writing lmao, depression (not specifically mentioned but it’s obviously there), a shit ton of crying, jaemin being kind of an asshole ngl, mentions of hockey (only because there might be some things that don’t make sense idk maybe they do to somebody who doesn’t watch it), VERY INACCURATE INFO ON BECOMING A TRANSLATOR

notes: here’s part 2 to New Beginnings! idk how to link it lmao im sorry im really bad at this also im iffy on how this came out but at this point whatever i wrote a lot. I’m gonna try to do the bold for korean again (cuz new beginnings on the app is fucking jacked af but on the full website it looks how it’s supposed to) but like just assume that everything the OCs are saying are in Korean and whatever the Dreamies say that aren’t to English speaking people are in Korean

“Please put on your seatbelts as we will begin our descent to Los Angeles, California.”

You did as the flight attendant asked and looked out the window. The ground slowly got closer and closer, and your heart raced with excitement. Despite how you’d felt a year ago, you couldn’t wait to land and start the next chapter in your life. You could still feel the exhaustion from it being in the middle of the night in Seoul, but that was so little compared to all the emotions running through your body.

Once you were out of security, you pulled up FaceTime on your phone and called Jisung. It rang and rang, and you almost gave up when he finally answered the call. He was out of breath, as if he’d just run to get his phone. His face lit up when he saw yours.

“Y/N! You landed safely!” he said. Your parents appeared in the frame, which made you smile.

“I did! I’m heading towards pick-up now, so hopefully I’ll be on my way to the rink,” you told them.

You’d decided you wanted to be an English-Korean translator, so you had been hired as a translator for a new NHL prospect. He was born and raised in Korea, and he knew very little English, so you were going to help him during prospect camp, translating and teaching him English. You expected to be in America until September, but if he made it past both prospect and training camp, who knew what your future held?

“Oh honey, I’m so proud of you,” your mom said.

“We both are. You’re gonna do great, we know it,” your dad added.

You looked around and spotted your name on a sign that was held by a man with a driver’s cap. You told your family you had to go and hung up before walking over. He greeted you with a smile and grabbed one of your bags, heading to the parking lot. You shot a text to the boys, letting them know you’d landed. The drive to the rink didn’t take long, and you were escorted by a security guard through the hallways to an office.

“Ms. Park is here,” the security guard announced before heading back to his area.

“Y/N, it’s very nice to meet you. I’m Rob Blake, the general manager,” a very tall man in a suit said. He held his hand out to you, which you shook. “We’re very happy to have you here. Chi-won Han’s translator from last year has a new job, so we’re glad you can stay for longer.”

“Thank you, Mr. Blake. I’m very excited for this opportunity,” you stated with a wide smile. “So, where should we start?”

Mr. Blake’s assistant gave you multiple papers to sign before bringing you to get your ID made. You proudly hung it around your neck, even though your picture looked absolutely horrible (you just got off an eleven-hour flight). Then, Mr. Blake himself brought you to a conference room where the prospect, his agent, and the coaches were.

“Everyone, this is Y/N Park. She will be Chi-won’s translator.”

You bowed and said, “Han Chi-won, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Park Y/N.”

The boy bowed as well. “Thank you for flying here, Y/N. You have to idea how appreciative I am.”

You then introduced yourself to the agent and the coaches, dropping your bags to bow and shake hands. You told them about your exact role and how to contact you in case you were needed last minute. You’d been given a phone for work with everyone’s contacts in it, along with a rental car since you still had a valid driver’s license. You were then handed the keys to your apartment, which you would be sharing with Chi-won and one of the Kings’ players, Tyler Toffoli.

“Y/N, do you own any skates?” Marco Sturm, one of the assistant coaches, asked.

You shook your head. “I’m not very good at skating, but I’ll definitely do my best.”

“Have Tyler and Chi-won take you shopping for a pair. We really need you on the ice for drills.”

You translated for the hockey player when his head perked up at his name. He nodded shyly, his eyes darting to the floor. You couldn’t help but feel bad for him; he had no idea what anyone was saying, so for all he knew you could’ve been talking poorly about him. None of you would do that, but he didn’t know any better.

“Camp doesn’t officially start until tomorrow. We just wanted you to meet before then so that you can get situated. before the madness,” Mr. Blake explained.

“I appreciate that. It’s past midnight in Korea, so I’m pretty exhausted,” you replied.

“You guys are all set for today. We’ll see you bright and early tomorrow for day one.”

You turned to Chi-won and asked, “You wanna get food?”

He nodded vigorously, saying, “Tyler and his wife were making breakfast when I was called down here.”

Grabbing your bags, you said your farewells to the men before heading out, Chi-won hot on your feels. When you clicked the key fob for the rental car, a new SUV lit up. You let out a low whistle and popped the hatch, tossing your suitcases and duffel in. You and Chi-won then climbed in and decided on a local diner. The car ride was mostly silent, the radio playing softly in the background. When you walked into the restaurant, his eyes widened in fear as the waitress spoke to him. You ordered juice for the both of you and then started translating the menu with ease, watching his shoulders relax at the sound of a language he knew.

The two of you ate in silence for a couple minutes, simply enjoying your food. You checked your personal phone for any messages, but there was nothing. You weren’t surprised, though. The boys were supposed to be asleep, so you expected there to be nothing, but it still hurt to see that you hadn’t even heard from Jaemin. Then again, you probably should’ve expected as much.

“What?” Jaemin asked quietly.

You’d shown up at the dorms, wearing one of your boyfriend’s sweatshirts and a pair of shorts. Your hair was a mess from stressing out, so you had the hood up. He had to know what was going on, and you were out of time.

“I’m going back to America,” you repeated. “A major sports team contacted me last month to help one of their prospects. He doesn’t know much English, so I’ll be translating for him during camp.”

“When you do leave?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?!” You flinched at the sudden rise of his volume, the sound bouncing off the walls. There was no way the other Dreamies hadn’t heard him. There was no way the other Dreames hadn’t heard him, and you started to panic. This was definitely not how you expected this to go. “You’ve known for a month, and you’re just telling me now?!”

“I was going to tell you sooner, but since you’re working on your comeback, you’ve had to cancel dates! I didn’t have a choice but to tell you now!” you argued.

“Oh, so now it’s my fault?”

“I didn’t say that, Jaemin. I’m just explaining that there wasn’t a good time, so that’s why you aren’t finding out until the day before my flight. I’m sorry it wasn’t sooner.” Your hands were wringing in the kangaroo pocket, but it was hidden by the island in the kitchen.

“How long will you be gone?” When you didn’t answer right away, his jaw clenched. “How long, Y/N?”

Scared by his tone, you said, “I have no idea. Prospect camp is for a few days, but they’re expecting him to continue on to training camp in September.”

“Are you even coming back? What does that mean for us?”

“I don’t know, Jae!” you snapped. Your voice reverberated off the walls, and you could hear shuffling down the hall. “I don’t know.”

There was a heavy pause. He then asked, “You don’t know if you’re coming back? Or you don’t know what will happen with our relationship?”

“Both.”

“You’re very young to be a translator,” Chi-won stated, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You wiped your mouth with a napkin, giving you time to think of your answer without revealing too much. “My step-dad is from Korea. He and my mom got married when I was nine, but he and my step-brother had to stay there while my mom and I live here. We would visit whenever there was a vacation for school, so I learned it over the years.”

“Do you live in Korea now?”

“Right in Seoul. I moved after I graduated high school last year.”

Chi-won was silent after that. After you paid the bill, you plugged in the address for the apartment building and made the quick drive over. Parking along the street, Chi-won grabbed your bags for you and led you to the apartment. You used the key to unlock the door and walked inside. A man and a woman looked over at the same time from the kitchen and smiled.

“You must be the translator. I’m Tyler, and this is my wife, Cat,” the man introduced.

You shook their hands and said, “It’s nice to meet you. My name’s Y/N Park.”

“Come right in. I’ll show you where your room is,” Cat offered.

You followed her down the hallway to a room that had grey walls, dark wooden floors, and a matching wooden dresser. There was a queen-sized bed with fresh sheets on it and a cream armchair in the corner. Identical nightstands stood on either side of the bed, and there was a bathroom attached to the bedroom.

“Make yourself at home. You look like you’re about to fall asleep standing up,” she joked.

“Yeah, I’m gonna take a quick nap, if that’s okay?” you asked.

“Go ahead.”

Cat closed the door behind her, leaving you alone. You collapsed onto the bed and checked to see if any messages had come in before you’d left the diner’s WiFi, but still nothing. Sighing, you put your phone on the nightstand and let your eyes close, the heaviness becoming too much to fight against.

When you woke up, the sun was high in the sky. You groaned as your arms stretched above your head. According to your phone, it was a little past noon, so you rolled out of bed and headed to the kitchen. Luckily, the password to the WiFi was on the refrigerator. As soon as your phone was connected, it started blowing up with messages and snapchats. The sudden sound made you jump, definitely waking you up. You took some time to respond to the boys and your parents, and it took you a few minutes to notice that none of the notifications were from Jaemin. Sighing, you shoved your phone into your pocket and went looking for Chi-won. You found him in his room, looking at an English book with furrowed brows.

“I’m not starting lessons until after prospect camp,” you said.

The boy jumped, clearly unaware of your presence until you announced it. He closed the book and placed it on the nightstand before looking around the room, avoiding your eyes. Sighing, you sat at the desk that was by the window.

“What’s on your mind?” you asked.

“What if I don’t make it past this camp?” he questioned.

You let out a deep breath and said, “Then you go back to your team in Korea, continue to train and practice, and then next year, you’ll come back. The exact same thing as what you went through last year.”

“What will happen to you?”

“I’ll go back home as well. I’m currently under contract with the team, so if you’re not here, I’m not needed. They’ll let me know when I am. You’re stuck with me.”

///

You and Chi-won walked into the practice rink the next morning, a fresh pair of skates in the duffel bag on your shoulder. You’d gone out with Tyler and Chi-won after dinner to buy them, just like Coach Sturm had told you to. The thought of being on the ice with a bunch of hockey players and falling on your ass was terrifying, but you didn’t have much of a choice.

You headed to the weight room and sat on a bench. Skating wouldn’t come until after they were done for the day, so your bag was simply dropped to the floor. You then pulled out your phone and looked at the last message you’d sent to Jaemin.

You: I know you’re upset, but I would love for you to be at the airport tomorrow.

He never showed up. Everyone else had, but he’d stayed at the dorms. The way the conversation had ended left the status of your relationship up in the air, and you were too scared to ask. Your anniversary was supposed to be in a little over a month, but you didn’t even know if that was something to be celebrated anymore.

The sound of the door opening behind you caught your attention. The players started filtering into the room, shooting odd looks your way. You stood up when Chi-won walked in, moving to his side for when the head strength and conditioning coach started talking.

After a speech, the coach came over and introduced himself, apologizing for missing the meeting the day before. When you assured him it was fine, he transitioned the conversation to the first test he wanted Chi-won to run through. You translated everything as you followed them to the bikes, not missing a single beat. You watched as he pedaled and pedaled, sweat dripping down his face as his leg muscles rippled from the rapid movement. You could hear the cheers of encouragement from the other prospects as they watched the others that were running through the tests.

When there was time for a break, Chi-won took the water bottle you handed him, draining it fairly quickly. He then grabbed the towel from your shoulder and wiped his face and neck, tossing it in the hamper in the corner. He looked around at the other prospects, watching them talk and laugh with each other. You felt bad knowing he wouldn’t take that first step. It was understandable, though. You’d gone through the same thing when you started making trips to Korea; you’d been surrounded by people who understood you as much as you understood them, which was not a lot.

After a few minutes, it was time for more testing. You followed the group around the weight room, mostly watching but translating when needed. Everyone’s eyes were on you whenever either of you spoke, but all your attention was on him and whoever was talking to him.

At the end of the day, Chi-won looked like he was about to drop at any moment. You decided to skip the skating and brought him back to the apartment, using the work phone since it could connect to data. He dozed in the car, his face finally relaxed. You’d never noticed how much tension was there until now. Between the stress of getting past this camp and not knowing what anyone was saying, his head was probably spinning.

When you entered the apartment, Chi-won immediately headed to his room to nap. There was a note from Tyler and Cat that they’d gone to run errands, leaving you alone. You tried to FaceTime your parents, but neither of them answered. You knew the others were rehearsing, so you called Mark, but he didn’t answer either. Feeling dejected, you headed to your room and sat in the armchair. You looked out the window and watched the world below, a sudden flashback to the day you and Jaemin were sitting in the mall’s food court. Your heart ached at the thought of one of the happiest days of your life, knowing there was a chance it was all over.

///

It was the last day of the four-day camp for prospects. You wobbled onto the ice as you tried to skate closer to Chi-won. He looked over and rolled his eyes before skating over, grabbing your arm, and dragging you to the group. A few of the players laughed, but you didn’t care. You would be laughing too if you’d seen it.

Yesterday, they’d run drills, so you got to see Chi-won on the ice for the first time, and you could see why he was their first-round pick the year before. However, the true test was the scrimmage scheduled for today. Drills could be run over and over until you got it right, but in a game if you made a mistake there was no going back.

Once the teams were split, Chi-won helped you to the bench. You could hear your personal phone ring with a FaceTime call, but you ignored it. It was most likely Jeno, calling to talk to you before he finally went to bed. He loved to call you before he went to bed, which annoyed Jaemin whenever you were on a call with your boyfriend. You wished you could answer, since you hadn’t had much interaction with anyone. You mostly translated back at the apartment, leaving you craving to talk to someone, but you felt too awkward talking to Tyler and Cat.

The scrimmage was exhilarating to even just watch. Chi-won was fast, despite how large he was. He wove through players, making fantastic plays. His stick work was quick, and he seemed to know where his teammates were, making passes without looking. There was no doubt in your mind that they were keeping him, but seeing the looks on the coaches faces made it that much better. Chi-won played fairly, probably too much; he always passed the puck for a goal instead of taking a chance himself.

During a break, Coach Sturm was going over a couple plays to Chi-won’s team. You translated as fast as you could, trying your best to make it sound clear and right. Hockey pretty much had its own language, so you assumed it was working when he nodded along. As he was about to head back onto the ice, you grabbed his attention.

“Shoot the fucking puck, man. You’ve made plenty of great passes. They want to see what you’re capable of.”

His eyes widened, but he nodded and bumped your held-out fist before skating back to the face-off. You watched the puck drop, and the game was on. Your eyes never left the player you were there for, his form zipping across the ice with a breakaway. He was denied, but you could tell there was a fire lit under his ass. There were still amazing passes, but he was taking shots on goal more. The goalie was just unbelievably good at his job,

There wasn’t much time left in the scrimmage when Chi-won was skating towards the goal, him against two defensemen. His feet moved in a way you couldn’t explain, and he slipped past the opposing players, taking a shot on goal. You nearly jumped with joy as it flew past the goalie’s shoulder, and you didn’t miss the smile on his face as he celebrated with his teammates.

At the end of the day, Chi-won was asked to dinner with some of the other prospects. He nodded his head with a grin, so they told you the restaurant. Your phone connected to the Bluetooth as you were typing it into the map, and “My First and Last” immediately started playing through the speakers. Chi-won sent a look your way but said nothing.

The other players made sure you and Chi-won had seats next to each other so you could easily translate for him. They asked him questions about his life in Korea and his teammates. He talked about his family, his girlfriend Eun-ji, and his friends. You were learning more about him by doing your job rather than conversing with him yourself. You could feel something heavy settle in your chest as they all talked to each other, only looking to you when you translated.

When you were back at the apartment, Chi-won collapsed onto the couch. You sat in an armchair and stared at the ceiling, thoughts of Jaemin running through your head. It’d been five days since you last heard from him, and you were still hesitant to reach out. He was probably in the same boat, but what if he didn’t want to hear from you? What if your relationship was over and you didn’t know it? You hadn’t talked to the other boys about it, not wanting to drag them into your drama.

“You’re thinking too loud,” Chi-won complained.

“Sorry,” you said quietly. “How do you think camp went?”

“I think I did well. My whole body hurts, though. I wish Eun-ji was here. She gives amazing back massages. I would be in constant pain if it wasn’t for her. I’m definitely the luckiest guy in the world.”

That’s what Jaemin tells me. “Is she gonna be starting college this fall?”

He nodded. “She wants to study sports medicine, so she’ll be studying at Seoul University. I’m so proud of her.”

You looked at the time on your phone before realizing that it was your work one. Your personal phone was still in your duffel, which was in the car. Cursing under your breath, you rushed downstairs and grabbed your phone from the bag.

Jaemin💕: 3 missed FaceTime video calls

Shit. Just in case your relationship wasn’t fragile enough, you’d missed three calls from him. It was the first time either one of you had tried reaching out since you stormed out of the dorms in tears. Worried, you headed inside and returned to the apartment as fast as possible. You tried calling Jaemin back, but he wasn’t picking up. It was about ten in the morning where he was, and he never slept in too much no matter what time he’d gone to bed, so you knew he was ignoring you. Trying again, you cursed and swallowed around the lump in your throat. He finally picked up, and he was not happy.

“Hey,” you said as you moved to your room.

“Hey. Where were you?” he asked.

“We were at camp, and then we went to dinner after,” you explained.

His eyebrows raised. “You went to dinner?”

“Yeah.”

“Was it a date?”

Your eyes widened in shock. “What the fuck, Jaemin? Of course it wasn’t a date! Why the hell would you ask that?”

“I mean, you did say you didn’t know how this would affect our relationship,” he snapped.

“That doesn’t mean I would cheat on you. God, do you really think that low of me?” You could feel the sting behind your eyes of tears forming, but you tried to hold them back.

“I don’t know what to think anymore, Y/N. You waited until the day before you were leaving to tell me about it—”

“I didn’t have a choice, and you know it!” you exclaimed. “You know what? I’m done. I can’t do this right now.”

You hung up and threw your phone across the room, muffling sobs into your hands. Being here, having the job you’ve worked towards the past year, it was supposed to be exciting, yet you were dealing with possibly the worst heartbreak yet, and you didn’t even know if there was a relationship to salvage anymore.

Your phone was ringing with a FaceTime call from Jisung, but you ignored it. He couldn’t see you like this; even though you were partially in the wrong in the fight, he would completely lose it and attack Jaemin. You didn’t want to be the cause of something happening to NCT Dream. It would have to stay to yourself, just like everything else about your life.

///

You’d been in America for two weeks, and you were absolutely miserable. You didn’t talk to the boys as much, ignoring some of their calls so that when you did answer, there was too much to talk about for you to think about Jaemin during the calls. You hadn’t talked to him since your last argument, and you didn’t know what to do. Jisung didn’t now, but it was clear he was suspicious of something. You just wanted to go home, but Chi-won had to stay in California for more training and practice. He’d been invited to training camp in September, so it was easier for him to just stay here until he knew his future with the team post-camp.

Chi-won’s English was improving a little, but it was clear he wasn’t confident in himself. Learning a language was hard, and English was one of the most difficult. From conjunctions to words sounding the same but being spelled different to even the sentence structure, you didn’t blame him for feeling self-conscious and frustrated. You had talked to Jisung, and he’d agreed to speak with Chi-won.

“Chi-won, can you come here for a minute?” you called out.

He walked into the living room, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He looked at your phone, jaw dropping when he saw Jisung on the screen. You held it out and said, “My brother wants to talk to you.”

He took the phone, sending a glance your way before looking back at Jisung. You moved to the kitchen to make breakfast, giving the boys some privacy. You could hear Jisung’s laugh through the tiny speaker, and it made your heart ache. Not seeing him every day felt like torture. You were so used to talk to him every day, but the both of you were too busy with your jobs, not to mention that you were still unsure of what the others knew about you and Jaemin.

As you were making some fried eggs, Chi-won joined you, holding your phone out with Jisung still on the screen. The hockey player sent a look that told you there would be a conversation later, and then he disappeared to his room. You looked at Jisung and smiled, asking him how it went. He said it went well, that Chi-won seemed to really listen to what he’d had to say. A door had opened behind him, and Chenle walked into the room. His face lit up when he saw you, and he ran over and jumped on Jisung’s back.

“Y/N! I haven’t talked to you in so long,” he said, suddenly pouting.

“I know, I’m sorry. Prospect camp was crazy, and I’ve been busy with teaching Chi-won English,” you replied. “I wish you guys were here. You’d love it.”

“We’ll have to visit sometime. Jisung, we gotta head to bed. We have practice tomorrow morning,” he said.

“Sleep well, you two,” you said with a smile.

“Love you!” they shouted, and then the call ended.

You finished breakfast and called for Chi-won. He joined you in the kitchen, taking his plate from you without a word. The two of you sat at the breakfast bar, eating in silence. Tyler and Cat were in Canada for a wedding, so you were alone with him. You waited for him to say something, anything, but he didn’t. Instead, he washed the dishes and went back to his room. He returned a few minutes later in workout clothes, so you changed into your own outfit and silently followed him to the gym downstairs. He started out on the bike while you went to the treadmill, starting a light jog.

After a few minutes, Chi-won said, “So, your brother is Park Jisung.”

“Yup. Has been for ten years,” you panted.

“I didn’t even know he had a sister.”

“No one does. It’s too dangerous.”

“That must suck. I can’t imagine keeping my sister a secret,” he said.

“Seeing him live his dream makes it all worth it. Besides, once I’m living here permanently, we’ll be able to tell everyone who I am.”

///

Getting out of bed was harder and harder as each day passed. You could feel yourself settle into a deep and heavy depression. and it seemed like the people you were living with were concerned. You never felt hungry, you were having trouble finding the motivation to shower, and you were ignoring every call that popped up on your phone.

There was a knock on your door before Cat poked her head in. You glanced at her before turning your attention back to the window. She sat in the armchair and leaned on her elbows, sending a smile your way.

“So, Chi-won and Tyler talked to the team, and they decided that if you want, you can go back to Korea until it’s time for training camp,” she told you.

You sat up slowly and asked, “What?”

“We can all tell how homesick you are, and Chi-won said that you had an argument with someone that sounded like your boyfriend. They have a back-up translator, so you can go home for a little bit,” she explained.

“He told you all that?”

“Well, he used an app to translate, but yes.”

Leaping out of bed, you hugged her tightly, mentally thanking yourself for having showered that morning. She laughed and hugged you back before telling you to start packing. You started throwing your things into suitcases and your duffel bag as she left, and tears started streaming down your face in happiness.

You hugged Tyler and Chi-won in thanks before rushing to the airport, not wanting to stay in America any more than you had to. You called your parents and Jisung once you had a ticket purchased, and they promised to keep it a secret. Jisung was practically vibrating in his seat once he heard the news, and you couldn’t wait to hug your family again.

Somehow, you managed to sleep on the flight. When you landed, it was about three in the afternoon. You raced towards your family as soon as you spotted them, leaping into Jisung’s arms. He lifted you up and squeezed tight, as if you would disappear if he let go. You then hugged your parents, not afraid to let the tears fall down your cheeks.

“I missed you guys so much,” you sobbed.

“We missed you too, sweetheart,” you dad said.

When you were home, you took a couple hours to settle in before taking Jisung with you to the dorms. Not only did you have some boys to surprise, but there was a certain boy with blue bangs you needed to speak to. Jisung seemed to be excited to be on the other end of the surprise.

As you walked into the building, your stomach twisted into a giant knot. You didn’t know how Jaemin was going to react. Before you could dwell on it too much, Jisung opened the door to the Dream dorm. Jeno and Haechan were playing video games in the living area, but they stopped immediately when they looked at you.

“Sunshine!” Jeno shouted. He threw the controller on the couch and ran over, scooping you into a bear hug.

“What are you doing here?” Haechan asked as you managed to pry away from Jeno to hug him.

“They let me come back home until training camp starts,” you explained. “Where are the others?”

“They’re in their rooms. Jaemin’s napping, but Renjun and Chenle are playing PUBG,” Jeno explained. “It’s good to have you back. Jaemin’s been moping every since you left.”

So they didn’t know. “I’ll go see Renjun and Chenle first. Jaemin must be really tired if he’s napping.”

You walked down the hallway and quietly stepped into Renjun and Chenle’s room. They were too busy looking at their phones to notice, so you sat by Renjun and asked how he was doing. He glanced at you and then did a double take before tackling you to the bed. Chenle complained, but when he looked up a screech left his mouth instead as he piled on top. They started asking you a bunch of questions at once, but you shushed them and explained why you were home. Chenle didn’t want to let go, but you explained that Jaemin didn’t know yet.

Jaemin looked so peaceful as he slept. You could just stand there and watch until he woke up, but the conversation needed to be had sooner than later. Quietly closing the door, you walked over and sat on the bed as gentle as possible. Your fingers carded through his hair, pushing it away from his forehead. He sighed in his sleep, melting under your touch. You called out his name lightly, but he didn’t stir. You tried a couple more times, and his eyes finally opened. He stared at you for about ten seconds before grabbing you. You were suddenly thrown on the bed, and he pinned your arms down before kissing you.

Kissing Jaemin felt like a dream, especially after what you two’d been going through the past few weeks. He pressed kiss after kiss to your lips, finally pulling away with a frown.

"I’m really sorry for how I acted the past couple times we talked. I trust you, and I support your career,” he said.

“I forgive you. God, I forgive you. I’ve been so miserable the past few weeks. I should’ve tried harder to tell you sooner than when I had.”

“Let’s just forget this, okay?”

“Deal.”

He leaned down to press your lips together again, not leaving any space between your bodies. He trailed kisses down your neck, sucking a mark into your skin at the base of your throat. When he moved back to your face, he whispered, “I love you.”

That was the first time either of you had ever said those words. Whenever the two of you were together, there was a good chance another Dreamie was with you, so actual dates were rare, which meant that neither of you felt like it was the right time to say them. However, the past three weeks, had proven that it didn’t matter how much time was spent alone.

“I love you too.”

It was about half an hour before you two emerged from the room. The others made fun of the hickeys that were all over your necks, but in that moment you didn’t care. You and Jaemin were more than okay, and that was all that mattered to you.

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skeletaldarling · 4 years

Text

Chase The Fire Away Chapter 3

The Witch’s Corner

AO3

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Summary: Patton gets too lose to seeing something he’s not supposed to see... and Remus and Logan work in the same bookshop!

Ship: Lomile, mentioned Sleepxiety, mentioned Roceit

Word Count: 1423

Warnings: Dark sides, Remus “Duke”, mentioned Deceit, swearing, blood, blood drinking, witches, vampires

Patton giggled at his phone screen. He was sprawled out on his bed, messaging Remus.

The Duke: Im not saying id fuck any werewolf I met

The Duke: Im just saying that its definitely rlly hot

Pancake: Werewolves tho?

Pancake: Not something cool, like a witch?

The Duke: UM RUDE!?!

The Duke: ARE YOU SAYING WEREWOLVES ARENT COOL?

Patton was smiling so much his cheeks were nearly aching. It was so easy with Remus, everything just felt so right and natural when they were talking.

The Duke: Actually id probably fuck a witch tbh

The Duke: As long as they had the hat

Pancake: Right, obvs they need the hat to be a witch

The Duke: Exactly!!

The Duke: Oh shit gtg

The Duke: Ttyl byeeeeee

Pancake: Byeeee

Patton tossed his phone down on the bed and flopped back onto his pillows with a happy sigh. He looked out the window at the tree and couldn’t help but feel like all those flowers hadn’t been there yesterday. Or this morning. Patton squeezed his eyes shut. He was definitely imagining it. He sat up again and jumped to his feet. Maybe Emile was making lunch.

When Patton got downstairs he could hear his dads in the kitchen.

“You can keep going, honey. I feel fine.” Emile said.

Patton could hear someone make a small inhaling sound, liking they’d been holding their breath before the tap started running.

“Lo?” Emile asked. “What are you do- shit.”

Patton reached the kitchen doorway and paused as he saw Logan hunched over the sink, coughing and spitting. Emile moved to block him from Patton’s view. “Hey, pumpkin!” he chirped. “Whatcha up to?”

Patton blinked. Emile’s cheeks were pink and he looked uncomfortable. “Um. Do you want some lunch?” he asked.

Patton looked at Logan. “Is Pa okay?”

Emile rubbed his husband’s shoulder. “Papa’s fine. He just, um, ate too fast.”

Patton furrowed his brows. That seemed like a blatant lie. “But-”

Logan coughed once more, louder, and wiped his face on his sleeve. “Dad’s right. I’m fine, Patton.” He rinsed the sink out and stood up straight again, he adjusted his glasses. “I could make us some omelets for lunch?”

Patton still seemed unsure but Logan pushed past it and opened the fridge. “Who wants to help?”

Emile grabbed a frying pan. “Pat, sweetpea, grab the glass bowl please?”

Patton hesitated before taking a deep breath. He was just being stupid. Papa’s fine. He reached up to get the glass bowl and handed it to Emile. They wouldn’t lie to him.

And there’s no way it was actually blood in the sink.

+++

“He almost saw you feeding!” Emile paced back and forth, chewing on his thumbnail. “Oh my goodness. What if he had walked in? He knows something’s wrong. He’s a smart kid, Lo. He’ll figure it out and he’ll be so hurt that we didn’t tell him!”

Logan sighed from the couch, his head in his hands. “Emi, please. Just calm down.”

“I can’t be calm! Patton trusts us now, and we’re keeping this from him. How is that fair?”

“Em, dear, we’re keeping this from him to protect him-”

“No, what does that even mean!? He’s not protected, he’s just a kid who doesn’t even know who his dads really are.”

“Emile.” Logan finally stood up and stepped in front of Emile’s pacing route, making Emile flinch at his vampire’s speed.

Logan took Emile’s hands and set them on his shoulders. He gently took Emile’s hips and tugged him closer. “It’s okay, kitten,” he whispered.

Emile shuddered as the tears that had been building finally spilled over. “I’m just so worried for him.” He buried his face in Logan’s neck.

The vampire rubbed his back. “I know you are.” He threaded his fingers through Emile’s hair and kept running his hand up and down his husband’s spine. “It’s okay.”

Emile cried. “I want to tell him.”

“Shhh, I know.” Logan kissed his head. “I know. We will. We can do it soon. We’ll do it soon, I promise.” He swooped down to pick Emile up, cradling him close to his chest. “Let’s get some sleep now, okay? It’s late.”

Emile sniffed and scrubbed his eyes. “Okay,” he whispered hoarsely.

Logan kissed his forehead and carried him up the stairs, smiling at his husband’s halfhearted protests.

“I can walk!” He insisted, keeping his voice low enough to not wake Patton.

“I’m sure you could, kitten, but why walk when you could have your vampire husband carry you?”

Emile kissed him as he was set down on their bed. “I love you heaps.”

“I love you heaps too, Emi.” Logan assured him. “Go to sleep.”

“Okay.”

+++

Logan hurried into The Witch’s Corner, his arms full of pastry bags and coffee cups. He sped straight to the counter and set everything down. He took a sip from his own reusable takeout cup as he grabbed his boss’s one. He took a second to admire the hand painted designs that were splashed across the cup, Dee’s work. Logan zipped to the back of the shop where Roman was organising a shelf of herb-filled jars.

“Your tea,” he said.

Roman glanced up. “Oh, thank you.” He took the cup gratefully.

“There’s donuts and biscuits on the counter.”

Roman hummed. “And how’s my son? Still obsessing over his wedding binders?”

“Remy was working at the counter when I got there. Virgil was serving all the customers and they both seemed incredibly annoyed with a florist.”

Roman chuckled. “Sounds like them.”

Logan leaned against the shelves and noticed a painting on the wall. “That’s new. One of Dee’s, right?”

Roman glanced over at the canvas Logan was referring to. It was a painting of two black cats, running through a forest, being followed by a colourful, sparkly mist. The witch smiled. “Yes. Dee made it the other day.”

“It’s beautiful.”

“It is.” Roman sipped his tea and straightened a crystal cluster on a bookcase.

They were interrupted by the bookshop’s door opening with a dainty little bell chime. “Hi, Roman!”

Roman smiled and headed out to the front. “Hey, kid.”

Remus bounced over to the counter. “Can I do something cool today?”

Logan walked over to them and sat down behind the counter. “Cool?”

“I wanna do witchcraft!” declared Remus. “Like you, Roman!”

“Roman’s not a witch,” dismissed Logan instinctively, shooting the older witch a tired look. “Stop feeding him your crazy voodoo lies.” he smirked.

Remus lit up. “I want to learn crazy voodoo!”

Roman laughed. “Alright. Maybe later, kid.” He pulled a donut from the brown paper bag. “But for now, you can redo the window display into something cool.”

Remus grinned. That was his favourite task. “Any theme?”

“Well it’s currently centred around dreamcatchers… so I’d say to switch it up we should go with the whole ‘skulls and crystals’ vibe.” Roman teased, smiling at the kid’s enthusiasm.

Remus was wiggling with anticipation. “YES!” He scampered off to collect various bits and bobs from around the little shop, switching things around and taking all the feathery hoops down from the window.

Logan shook his head fondly and pulled his book out from under the counter, it was a dusty old thing full of detailed sketches and smudgy faded scrawlings about ancient lore and myths. It took up a solid half of the counter but Logan loved it too much to stop reading through the old beliefs and occasionally jotting quotes down in his journal to do further research later.

The witch took his donut back to the furthest corner of the shop to finish filing away some new books. Roman finished just in time for Remus to pop back and say goodbye.

Roman waved him off and flipped the door’s sign to read ‘closed’. Logan was packing away his books. “Anything else you want done before I take off?”

“No, everything’s perfect. Go home, Logan. Give Emile a hug for me.”

“Of course.” Logan smiled and turned the door handle. “And stop telling that kid you’re a witch. We don’t need anyone else to know our secrets.”

“Oh come on. Remus is a good kid. There’s nothing wrong with a little bit of magic.”

“Maybe in your case,” said Logan, his smile saddening slightly.

Roman rolled his eyes. “You’re not any form of bad or evil, Logan. You’re just as mystical as the rest of us and the sooner you figure that out, the better off you’ll be.”

Logan inhaled deeply and looked to Roman once more. “Goodnight, Roman.”

“Goodnight.”

Taglist:

@sander-sideblog

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cmncisspnandmore · 5 years

Text

Mistakes were made, Part 4, Spencer Reid X Reader.

A/N: Hey guys, this is probably going to be the last part in this series. I hope you enjoyed it as much as i enjoyed writing it. Im also sorry if my postings have been all over the place, Im currently planning my wedding and dealing with some personal issues. I promise to try and get more fics out soon. My taglist and requests are open!

~~~~

You never thought you would be standing front of the FBI Building again, you never thought that you would be there for any other reason than work. Yet here you were, standing in front of your former workplace, diaper bag slung over your shoulder, a sleeping infant in the carried you shouldn't be holding because you were still on restriction. You hadn't planned on packing up yourself and your daughter, and driving to the FBI building. You thought you could push down the anxious feelings you had when Spencer had left for work. He had told you that you could call him at anytime, but when you called him in the midst of a panic attack over not being able to button Lucille's onesie. He didn't answer. You had tried to talk yourself down and tell yourself he was probably away from his desk, and he would call you as soon as he saw you called. But in your postpartum brain, buttoning her onesie was the end of the world. You bundled up the 2 week old baby, strapped her into her carseat and loaded her into your SUV.

You walk up to the door and pull it open, readjusting the diaper bag so it sat firmly on your shoulder. The front desk security officer stood up as he watched you struggle to pull open the second door, and rushed over to push it open for you.

“Ma’am are you okay?” He asked, stepping to the side and letting you walk into the marble floored lobby.

“I’m.. i’m fine. I need to see Dr. Spencer Reid.” You set the baby carrier down on the ground and Lucille makes a small noise and that sound alone startles you. You felt like you were walking on eggshells around your own daughter.

“I’m sorry, but you can't go up there without an agent escorting you. And i'm gonna have to see some ID, we can't let civilians in here.” The officer holds out his hand for your ID. You rummage around in the diaper bag for your wallet, and hasilty shove it towards him.

“Then phone him. Or a member of his team, but if you do not get him down here or let me go up to his office in the next 5 minutes so help me.” You watch as the officer scrutinizes your ID and turns it over.

“Let me call up there and see if one of them can come down.” He replies and hands your ID back to you. You glance down at the carrier and heave it up, your abdominal muscles screaming at the extra weight. Curse Spencer and his need to have the best baby carrier on the market, you swear this is the heaviest one out there. Not that Lucille was very heavy, she was only 6 pounds, but with the weight of the carrier she definitely exceeded your 10 pound lift limit.

“Woah there, don't hurt yourself.” A deep voice behind you calls as footsteps get closer. You turn slightly and see the one and only Agent Derek Morgan walking toward you.

“Hey there ass kicker, what brings you here.” He grabs the carrier from you and lifts it so he can look at your daughter. “You brought baby genius! Aww did she miss her favorite uncle?” He looks at your daughter for a moment before glancing at you.

“N-no… I called spencer and he didn't answer and i couldn't get her onesie to button. And i.. I need to talk to Reid.” You can feel the tears in your eyes, and Morgan puts a hand on your shoulder.

“Hey, don't cry, c’mon i’ll bring you to see the kid.” Morgan wraps his around his shoulder and guides you towards the elevator, your daughters carrier by his side. The security guard looks over morgan, as he leads you to the elevator.

“You know this woman?” He asks placing the phone down on the base.

“Yeah, shes Dr. Reid's girlfriend. I got this.” Derek gives the guard a nod as the doors open of the elevator. You both step in and when the doors slide closed morgan looks you over.

“You look worse for wear kiddo. Everything okay?” He asks, placing Lucille's car seat on the ground gently, the baby lets out small sigh, still sleeping peacefully.

“I probably look crazy huh?” you let out a small laugh as the elevator begins the ascent to the BAU’s floor. “I guess this whole motherhood thing is a little overwhelming. With how traumatic her entrance was, and having to recover from that and take care of her. And i swear she hates me Derek. She screams all the time when im taking care of her. I feel like such a failure. She's great for spencer, she never cries and it's like he knows exactly what she needs. He's so good with her and i feel like a fish who doesn't know how to swim.” You shrug and stare down at the sleeping child.

“Im supposed to be good at this, i'm her mother im supposed to know what to do.” You sniff and rub at your eyes.

“Hey, i remember when JJ first had Henry. She was a lot like you, and she didn't have a scare like you did. You almost died, and you almost lost your baby. Thats hard to deal with, and on top of all that you have this insane amount of hormones flooding your system. It might take you a little longer to get the hang of this. But that doesn't means that you're a failure.” Derek crosses his arms across his chest, and you nod your head slowly.

The door to the elevator opens and you see the familiar bullpen of the BAU. Your old desk is still untouched and everyone seems to be in the conference room, you can see them all sitting in at the table watching as Penelope scrolls through some slides on the big screen. Derek guides you over to your old desk and places Lucille's carrier on the desk.

“I’ll be right back,” He smiles and gives your shoulder a squeeze.

“Wait. If you guys are getting debriefed for a case then don't interrupt!” You grab his hand, and he shakes his head.

“Nah kiddo, they’re just going over some of the number for the department. We haven't gotten a case yet. Wait here.” He assures you and walks towards the conference room. You busy yourself with straightening Luce’s outfit and fixing her hat while you wait. You run your fingers down her arms and she wraps her small fingers around your pointer finger. She looked peaceful, and so sweet. You truly did love this small human with everything in you, but you had a feeling that she didn't love you as much as you loved her. You knew logically this was just probably the early signs of postpartum depression setting in but you still couldn't help feeling upset.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” Spencer calls to you as he walks towards you, worry is etched on his face. He stands in front of your old desk, and you stand and wraps your arms around him.

“I called you and you didn't pick up, and it's’ so stupid that i came here. Im sorry.” You start to cry and Spencer wraps his arms around you.

“What happened?” He rubs his hands up and down your back trying to soothe you.

“I couldn’t get her onesie to button and for some reason i started to have a panic attack because if i can’t get it to snap closed she could get a cold, and i can’t have that. And if she gets a cold it will be my fault and then you’ll hate me.” You look down at your shoes.

“Hey, it’s okay. And i could never hate you. Babies get colds, it’s better that they be exposed to some things now because it’ll build their immune system.” Spencer kisses your forehead.

“I’m sorry Spence,” you mumble into the soft fabric of his cardigan.

“No, i’m sorry Y/N, i should've paid more attention to my phone, you needed me and i wasn't there for you. And for that i'm sorry.” He kisses your hair, as Lucille starts to make cooing sounds from her carrier.

“Oh hey there, pretty girl.” Spencer lets you go and moves to the carrier. He carefully unclips her chest piece and the bottom buckle and lifts the small baby out of the seat and into his arms.

“Are you going mama a hard time?” He asks her softly, and she makes a small noise as if she was agreeing with him.

“You gotta be nice to her, she went through a lot ot get you here. We could've lost her, so you gotta be gentle with her. This is hard for her too.” He kisses her head and she blinks up at him with her large eyes. Her soft brown hair has started to curl just like his in the few short weeks she's been here.

“Oh my lord! Is that her?!” Garcia squeals as she rushes over to where Spencer is standing holding your daughter against his chest. “Can i hold her?” She extends her arms, motioning for Spencer to release the child so she could promptly cuddle the small human who was causing you to slowly slip from sanity.

“Of course,” He carefully places her in Garcias arms.

“Oh hello you little genius offspring.” She coos at the baby and bounces her in her arms. “Let's give Mommy and Daddy a moment to talk, we can go see Auntie JJ, and Grandpa Rossi.” Garcia walks away with her over towards the desk of the senior agent. You watch her nervously, as much as you were grateful for her being occupied by another, you couldn't help but feel like something bad would happen if you let her out of your sight.

“Y/N, she's fine. You look more wound up than some of the victims we deal with.” Spencer squeezes your shoulder and you feel yourself deflate.

“C’mere,” Reid takes a seat at your old desk chair and pulls your hand so you’re sitting in his lap. “I think you should go back to your doctor and tell them what's happening. I know you are the last person to ask for help, but you need it. You're scaring me.” He admits and rests his chin on your shoulder.

“You're right…” You look down at your hands and Spencer places one of his over yours.

“I can call and make the appointment. But for now, why don't you and i go talk to JJ and see if maybe she wants to leave work early with you and me and we can go over to her place and hang out with Henry. She mentioned how much she wants to help us with Lucille and i know you will feel better if you hear some of what she went though.” Spencer suggest, and you nod slightly.

“Can we get ice cream too?” You ask as you stand up and Spencer helps you gather your things as you both walk over to JJ, Rossi and Garcia. As you talked to the other agents and JJ agreed that you and Spencer coming over would be amazing, you start to feel better for the first time since your daughter was born.

Maybe there had been a few mistakes made, and not everything went as smooth as you imagined it would, but you wouldn't trade it for the world.

~~~

Taglist

Criminal Minds: @morcialovechild @banananna99

#spencer #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer x reader #spencer x you #x reader #reid #Criminal Minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x you #criminal minds x y/n #jj #garcia #baby #series #x y/n #x you

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sparklyicecube · 5 years

Text

He’d be proud

This is my secret santa present for @maidenofbagend for the Harry Potter Secret Santa! It’s a prongsfoot fanfic that I hope you will enjoy!

“Why must this happen to meeeeeeeeee.”

“Well well, I never thought I’d see you on the bed contemplating life, if I might guess, wondering why you like a certain deer?”

Sirius threw a pillow at the person.

“Shut up Remus. I don’t have a crush on any deer, and it’s a stag not a deer.”

Remus smirked while Sirius’s eyes widened in realisation of his mistake and buried his face in his pillow.

“Oh come on, what is it this time?” Prodded Remus.

“You know, James has done so much for me, taking me in on holidays, pranking with me, being so kind and helpful…” Sirius trailed off.

“I wouldn’t be so quick to give him those last two compliments if I were you.”

“I just,” Sirius sighed, “I want to get him something nice for christmas.”

Remus laughed, it wasn’t often that Sirius let down his cool, smug-like demeanor to show weakness like this, and the fact that this was for his best friend made it even better.

“If it’s just about that I’m sure you can find something great. Remember, it has to come from the heart.” Reminded Remus.

The door flew open as James dramatically walked in, Remus rolled his eyes and Sirius laughed.

“I’m so sorry my dear Sirius but I do quite need Remus for as long as this activity takes.” Declared James.

Remus and Sirius looked at each other, Remus shrugged and got up from where he was sitting on the bed to follow James.

Sirius kept up his cool smirk until the door closed then threw the blankets over himself in an attempt to figure out how to cool his face down.

James on the other hand was in a similar situation, except he now had a reluctant ear for him to talk to.

“Remus I called him ‘dear’!” Wailed James as soon as he stepped out of earshot. Remus wondered why his two best friends were like this. “Remus, I need to get him the best present ever! But I don’t think he even really wants anything!”

Remus sat in a comfy chair in the Gryffindor common with his book that he managed to grab, James spread out on a couch, it was practically midnight and they could talk well without any peepers, as far as they cared at least.

“Remuuuuuuus.” James whined, “What do I get him for christmas?”

Remus’s eye twitched but he didn’t snap.

“I don’t know, why don’t you wrap yourself up in a bow and give him that?” Hinted Remus.

“Best friend status doesn’t carry that far.” James complained. Remus sighed, these two were going to need a lot of pushing to get an inch past ‘best friend status’.

He went back to reading his book before another whine came from the couch.

“Remus, I know me and Sirius are close, and I know I’m irresistible, and you’re helping me but… I think he has a crush on you.”

Remus froze and put his book down, James didn’t know all the nights that Sirius spent ranting about James’s messy hair, dorky glasses, the infuriating dance between him and James that kept them always within arms length, never more never less. However, James had a point, for someone who never knew what was said, who just knew the hours and that Sirius was dying to talk to Remus for some reason, it was quite likely that it could be true. But not in this case.

“Look, I think we both know that’s not true, and even if it were, that wouldn’t stop you from getting him a magnificent christmas present or be stressed about it, so let’s work on one thing at a time okay? Come on, let’s go to bed.”

“You haven’t done your transfiguration homework?” Asked James as he caught sight of Peter’s frantic writing.

“What’s another word for ‘this shows’?” Asked a very stressed Peter.

“Try using ‘this highlights’.” Suggested Remus, taking a bite of the very delicious-looking sandwich.

The four were sitting at the dining table, eating their breakfast and doing their homework and…

“Hey Padfoot, no matter how much you stare at my muffin I’m not giving it to you.” Teased James.

Sirius snapped out of his trance-like state, from staring not at the muffin but at a certain someone Remus observed. He quickly bounced back.

“That muffin? I was just wondering how you never get sick of the same muffin everyday, really, you’re going to turn into a muffin one day!”

“Hah!” Exclaimed James. “You’re saying that but in reality you think my muffin is awesome!” The two burst into laughter.

James leaned over to peep at what Peter was writing.

“Um, I don’t think Minnie wants an essay on changing pizzas into muffins…” Commented James.

“I can’t stand it! I can’t write this! I need food!” He cried.

“I can’t wait until the holidays!” James said, ignoring Peter shovelling food into his mouth. “You guys could come over!” Realised James perking up.

“As much as I’d like to, my mom would freak if I don’t go home.” Answered Sirius with a slightly downed tone.

“Then… send me an owl when you convince her, we could meet up a week before school maybe?”

“Remember, she infiltrates all the owls.” Pointed out Sirius semi-dejectedly.

At that point the bell rang and sent the four scrambling for their books and equipment and imminent doom.

“Cleaning the trophy room is boring.” Declared James.

“Yes but we were 10 minutes late to class.” Pointed out Remus.

“Why did Professor have to split up me and Sirius?” Protested James as he attempted to wipe off the dust on a glass cabinet.

“She had a point, as long as you two were together there’d be no way the detention would be properly carried out.” Remus pointed out.

“Well in that case… Remus I still have no idea what to get him for christmas!!!” James complained, “And not much time to get it!”

“Why not a mirror, so you can feed his big ego?” Suggested Remus.

“A mirror is boring… “

“A phone?”

“What’s a phone…”

“It’s something muggles use to communicate with each other.”

“But that’s a muggle thing…” James’s eyes suddenly lit up, as if struck by a lightning bolt of inspiration. “You’re brilliant Remus! If I get him a mirror that we can use to communicate then there’s no way his mom can take it from him right? All I have to do is make it so that the mirror reflects what the other mirror should be reflecting! And audio of course… You’re a genius!”

“Well when am I not?”

Would a genius push their two best friends, who clearly want to get together, off a cliff? Yes, yes they would. Should he? Yes, yes he should. Can he? No, unfortunately there are not enough cliffs in Hogwarts that are convenient to push people off, and there aren’t any books in Azkaban. Would a genius push together, not just anyone, but Sirius Black and James Potter? The two biggest idiots and pranksters on the planet? No. Definitely not. But he shall do it anyway.

A slight trip and push landed Sirius a spot in James’s arms. It didn't end there though, nothing the marauders did ended at just that, no, James caught him like a fairy tale and spun him around. ‘Where did the rose in James’s mouth come from?’ Questioned Remus in his head. They threw their heads up in a flourish and ended on a showy pose. James looked down for a split second only the other marauders could see from their front row seats and proceeded to drop his best friend on the floor of the great hall, for now their fellow students can go back eating their dinner in peace.

James blinked in surprise then profusely apologised. Sirius made a big show of spinning his head around dizzily.

“Remus, I think I have a headache, take me to Madame Pomfrey.” Sirius then grabbed onto Remus’s hand and pulled him along out of the hall.

“What are you-”

“Remus I can't take it…” Sirius sighed. “Not that close, not that intimate just not that, you know?” Sirius looked at Remus for confirmation, a longing in his eyes.

“Then tell him already for goodness sake! It’s not my place to confess for you, you know?” Remus said.

“I would but…” Sirius looked away, “I don't think he'll say yes.”

“On what basis?” Remus asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Remus, it's so obvious, he likes you.” Sirius stated sorrowfully.

Remus thought back to the time where James basically begged him to help woo Sirius, the time that Remus had to listen to an hour of ranting about Sirius’s amazing comebacks and so on, these two were crazy similar yet surprisingly dense to no one but the other.

“Look Sirius, even if he does for some insane reason have a crush on me, I’d turn him down.” Remus deadpanned. Sirius stared at him.

“What?”

“Well yeah, I don't have any feelings for James and there is someone right beside me who’d be perfect for him.” Remus nudged him with his elbow playfully.

“Thanks.” The two started walking back to the great hall. “You know I’m thinking a scrapbook…”

As they ate dinner Remus thought of possible date ideas, library? They would never. Picnic? Not grand enough. Astronomy tower? Too cramped. Now Remus was starting to reconsider the idea of pushing the two off a cliff, maybe into the lake would be more feasible. Wait, this year they can finally go to Hogsmeade! And Remus knows for a fact that the two have the signatures ready so…

“So, The trip to Hogsmeade is coming up soon, where do you two want to go first?” Asked Remus.

“I don’t know, oh! They said that they have a joke shop! Let’s all go and get materials!” Exclaimed James.

“What about the Three Broomsticks? We can all go-” Started Sirius.

“Actually,” Remus cut in, swinging his arm onto Peter’s shoulder. “Me and Peter have plans for Hogsmeade.” Said Remus calmly.

“We do?” Asked Peter blankly.

“Remember? We have some christmas shopping to do, alone.” Emphasized Remus. James and Sirius shared a mildly suspicious look.

“Better get us amazing presents!” Teased Sirius.

James and Sirius walked into the Three Broomsticks in awe, Hogsmeade was truly magical, even to those who had grew up in it. They snagged a comfy little table, they saw some of their fellow students but when they looked like they might come over they seemed to change their minds. The two were good at keeping up appearances but on the inside both were freaking out, it was so obvious that this was meant to be a cute little date for the two but they had danced this ‘best friend’ dance for so long that it was hard to step out.

“So, how is life?” Asked Sirius in a joking way, putting his face to rest on top of his palm, propping himself up.

“Well,” Began James, mimicking Sirius’s pose. “How is the most handsome person in the world?” The pickup line had been set in place, ready for Sirius to ping-pong it back but…

“Amazing, thanks for asking.” Replied Sirius coolly, making a mental note to try and quell the butterflies in his stomach.

They both laughed for a bit before discussing about a bit of light quidditch then lapsing into awkward silence.

“So… Remus and Peter went christmas shopping huh?”

“Yeah… On that note, have you gotten my gift yet?”

James had a look of terror on his face before replying: “All done and wrapped in time for christmas.” He boasted gleefully. “What about you?”

“You really think you’d be done before me? I finished ages ago.” Sirius inwardly panicked, he had started the scrapbook but it was only half-done.

“That sure is convincing.” James pointed out before bursting into laughter with Sirius.

“Are you sure about this Remus?” Asked Peter. The two of them were under James’s very handy invisibility cloak, Remus was watching James and Sirius walk into the restaurant. Remus finally explained everything to Peter (who was legitimately

unaware of everything that was happening) and made sure their unofficial date was a success. He managed to hand all the other students notes saying to keep away from the two, and was monitoring them.

“Yes. Not really but if I don’t do this now I will have to live more of this nonsense before christmas official comes.”

“Is that their new strawberry cheesecake crumpet?!” Asked Peter, dashing out, pulling off their invisibility cloak off. It was quite dark so not many noticed it but Sirius saw him and immediately made a beeline for him, almost spilling with news. James also got up and started going towards him and Remus panicked.

Remus grabbed Sirius’s hand and with some quick maneuvering managed to get it in James’s, carrying with the momentum a twirl.

“Take Sirius, dance with him, kiss him and shut him up please.” Pleaded Remus.

James looked into Sirius’s grey eyes, Sirius into James’s hazel. The bulk of the restaurant was watching. The moment stretched out and instead of dropping Sirius like the incident before (he is never going to live that down) James pulled Sirius up to connect their lips.

The entire restaurant was clapping and hooting and many stood up to give a standing ovation. There were fireworks in the background and this was truly where the both of them belonged, in the middle of a crowd right next to each other.

James hefted Sirius to his feet and they both had huge arching smiles that haven’t been seen for forever. Remus joined them as they started towards the door.

“Did something happen?” Asked Peter, sprinting to catch up with them.

The Marauders laughed and headed back towards the big castle of Hogwarts.

“Come on.” Whined James. “Your parents won’t allow you to be away on christmas, neither will yours or yours or mine!” Gesturing to all the Marauders. “And I want to see your faces when you open my presents!”

“He holds a valid point.” Noted Sirius.

“Just Marauder presents though, I am opening all of my other presents on christmas day itself.” Finalised Remus.

The other three nodded with so much enthusiasm that Remus couldn’t help to laugh.

They started opening their presents, shouting with glee.

“A mirror?” Said Sirius quizzically, then immediately started posing in front of it.

“Nope! That’s what you think but actually, you see in this mirror what you are supposed to be seeing in the other.” Explained James with pride.

“We can see each other even when my mother doesn’t want me to!” Squealed Sirius, grabbing James and pulling him into a kiss, which, has been a regular occurrence ever since that date.

“Open mine now.” Said Sirius with excitement, passing the parcel over.

“Is this a… scrapbook?” Asked James.

“Yep! I added as many photos as I could, especially the embarrassing ones!” They spent all night looking through the book, even when the Head Prefect told them that some people needed to sleep. The four of them went home that year with the biggest smiles ever and constantly laughing, two of them with a newfound relationship and happiness.

“I remember that, you gave me and James ‘portable fans’.”

“Yep, a very good decision if you ask me.”

“What was it you said? Oh yes. ‘The next time either of you say ‘I’m so hot’ there is a fan right there.’ Very sassy.”

The two looked wistfully out of Sirius’s window.

“Do you think Harry is going to have a christmas as good as that?”

“Well if Molly gets ahold of him I guarantee you he will, and as long as you are around I’m sure he will also be happy, Sirius.” Sirius smiled sadly.

“I miss him.”

“There isn’t a soul who doesn’t.”

“Death Eaters?”

“They don’t have souls.” The two laughed slightly, not nearly as full or as carefree as they were when they were thirteen but when you are both scarred, scared and in the middle of a war, that is good enough.

“Well I’ve got to go, Nymphadora is expecting me soon.”

“Doesn’t she hate people calling her that?”

“Your point?”

“James would be proud.” Remus gave Sirius a tired smile.

Sirius sat in his room, it was decorated with red and gold, quidditch posters and so on, yes. James would be proud.

#mine #fanfiction #fanfic #harry potter #james potter #sirius black #remus lupin #peter petigrew #prongsfoot #slight angst #but mostly fluff #fluff

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s0ftkwan · 7 years

Note

Yooooo friends to lovers seungkwan would be really nice 😊😊

late post…..again sorry but thank u

seungkwan was a family friend you knew since you were like 4

his mom and yours were college friends who were just so excited about seeing each other again when they moved into your neighborhood

they were even more excited when they learned that their children were the same age!!

matchmaking mother time

basically how you actually became close was because of your moms

the constant playdates, the dinners with the fam, the enrolling in the same school

the force behind your relationship with kwan was your own mom

but that didnt mean you hated it!!

seungkwan was literally an angel

an a n g e l

perhaps the nicest boy you have ever met and will ever meet

has the kindest eyes and the purest heart

this was when boo was a soft spoked child with the shyest smile and the smallest giggle

also your second mother most of the time

one time you scraped your knee from chasing a butterfly

found you crying near the creek behind your house

scolded you with the “i told you so” line like how he scolded cheol in the boomboom dancing game thing u know

he would still pull out one of his hello kitty band-aids that he keeps in case you hurt yourself though

remember, just like a mom: only scolds you because he loves cares about you

in turn, you were seungkwan protector #1

you two were in different classes in first grade and he was so scared because you were his bff!! he was such a shy bean w/o u!!

but you squished his cheeks and told him he’d be fine and if he ever need u, you’d be in the room next door

made him feel 10000x better

so lil kwan goes to class but sits beside the mean boy who is known for stealing pencils and teasing ppl

teased seungkwan for having chubby cheeks and mismatching socks the whole day

when classes were finally dismissed, you caught up with seungkwan who had tears forming in his eyes

he didnt even have to say anything and you were already pulling up the sleeves of your jumper ready to fite

the next day you stormed into seungkwan’s classroom and all the kids looked up like?? who u

and you were like “YAH! KID WHO’S BULLYING MY ANGELIC BFF BOO SEUNGKWAN COME OUT HERE AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN”

kid almost peed his pants when you forced him to apologize

seungkwan gained so much more confidence in himself and respect for you after that

you two only got closer and closer until high school came along

your dad told you he got a really good job offer in seoul and that he already said yes to it

your family was moving in a week and when you had told seungkwan

boy burst out into tears

“i- *sobs* w-wont m- *cough* miss y-you *chokes* what a-are you t-talking a-bout?“

after a good 2 hours he finally calmed down

helped you pack the whole week

and then ended up crying like that in the airport again

anways

contrary to popular belief, distance didnt create a gap in your friendship with seungkwan

you two definitely called, texted, facetimed, emailed, etc everyday

he texted “fighting!!” to you everyday and would even put in a few more words if he knew you had a big event on that day

you would always call him if he had one to and try to calm him down

and if he didnt answer, you would leave him a voice mail cheering him up

facetiming was your constant thing though

even if you had an important test the next day, whenever you would see his caller id on your screen, you would drop everything and answer it

you would talk about so many things

from popular topics like “taylor swift or katy perry” this is such old news im sorry to the most obscure topic like “are there llamas in the desert??”

you two stayed up just talking to each other one time that you watched the sunrise together through a screen

you could see that he was struggling to keep himself awake as he was humming a song to himself

which then turned into singing

seungkwan was always known for his beautiful voice, but surprisingly you only seemed to truly appreciate it now when he was a hundred miles away from you

it made your heart ache for the boy you grew up with

all you wanted was to see him and tell him how much you love him

…. what

it finally dawned on you that you had fallen in love with your best friend

a few days after that facetime, seungkwan calls you again

he’s screaming half of the time and you’re like ‘boo calm down i cant hear you if im deaf’

he does calm down and excitedly tells you that he’s moving to seoul for college after his graduation!!!

you look at the calendar hanging on the wall and realize that it was his graduation in three days but you couldnt be there ;-(

but you also realize that wOw its been nearly four years since you saw seungkwan?? your best friend?? and crush????

sounds fake but ok

he lets you promise to pick him up in the airport and you tell him of course you’ll be there

fast forward to about a week later

youre at the airport bouncing on the heels of your foot waiting for seungkwan to come out of the arrivals gate

honestly, youre nervous as hell

you havent seen this man in 4 years!!! what if he just looks at you and decides he doesnt want to be your friend anymore?

shove that thought away hoe seungkwan is so loyal to you

your hands get clammy thinking about seeing him DESPITE YOU BEING IN L O V E WITH HIM

youre thinking to yourself ‘homygod this was a mistake i have to leave tAXI WHERE TF IS A TAXI’

but youre too late

because as soon as you know it, you feel a pair of arms wrap around you in a hug

you freeze for a second, finally feeling how fast and hard your heart was beating

“i missed you“

seungkwan’s voice sounded just like honey in your ears

he loosens up just enough for you to turn around and face him

OMG

HES GLOWING

first thing you noticed was that he got soooooo much taller since the last time you saw him

and more handsome as well

his cheeks though

they looked so full and squishy while he was smiling at you

legit me during diamond edge

his eyes crinkled because he was smiling so hard

you just stare at him longer than necessary and his smile gradually disappears and is replaced by a pout

“whats wrong?“

your eyes linger on his lips especially

without thinking

being the absent minded fool you are

you just

dove right in

and kissed him

it was a short peck on the lips, nothing special

just your whole heart exploding but whatever

you quickly pull away when you realized what the frick you just did

you pull yourself away from his arms, which went limp and simply fell beside him

you felt the tears in your eyes realising your mistake

you tried to apologize but

he pulls you back in his arms and just hugs you tightly

“i’ve been wanting to do that since middle school, but looks like you beat me to it“

i love seungkwan so much

#seventeen #seventeen au #seventeen imagines #seventeen imagine #seventeen scenarios #seventeen scenario #boo seungkwan #requests

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diondecarnate · 5 years

Text

EXTREMELY LONG rant about Dororo below the cut, all spoilers no context so if u havent seen the 2019 Dororo anime this probs isnt for u but i needed to put all of this somewhere to cope cause bruh

dororo is so good n just so fucking tragic

you have this Asshole of a dude who decides to take the easy way out but also like, if you have all these people under you, relying on you, i think that its kinda understandable to want them to have a prosperous and good life. daigo just went about doing that for

1- the completley wrong reasons, not to get all Good Place on this but he wanted the land prosperous so that he would have more power, not necessarily so his people would be healthy and well-cared for. I think this is shown in the final few episodes where he carelessly grabs people and horses from the villages, uncaring if he is hurting those left behind. His only focus is on growing and keeping his power.

and 2- he does it in the completley wrong way, like really?? youre going to go to making a deal with demons? I suppose in the show he does say he exhausted all other options but still,,,,, bruh,,,, you had to have known deep down that this was not gonna end well. daigo is just a complete shithead honestly, and i completley hate him.

theres definitely a part of me that really wanted Hyakkimaru to kill him at the end, however I do honestly think the end he got was the best one. It made sense given where Hyakkimaru was at at the end of the show, and also I think it doesnt actualy fall into the whole “if i killed you id be just like you!” dumb thing, and instead feels more like he gets ignored in a sense? like, he gets his moment of drama and everything, and of course Hyakkimaru was going to have to deal with him n get closure, but after daigo goes all “bleh just kill me, then i can rule over hell (??? i guess dude)” Hyakkimaru was just like, nah dude, peace n left. It really gave him very little screentime in the end, which is exactly what he deserved. plusssss he didnt seem like he was in v good shape so lets just say he died of “too much realizing i fucking suck as a person” or whatever

Tahomaru.................. bruh even thinking about him makes me wanna fucking cry like... can you imagine being 15 years old and finding out you have a brother you never knew, and that if your brother lives your entire land is (supposedly) going to die. like, Tahomaru is the next leader of this provence, and unlike his terrible father, he actualy cares about his people very deeply. So when given the insane problem of either killing his older brother, or watching all his people suffer, he choses what I think I also would have chosen!! especially at 15 holy shit, he is a teenager being asked to make this fucking terrible choice n it just fully fucking sucks.

Tahomaru fully deserved better, and I will take every AU that says him n Hyakkimarus moms got the fuck out of there n survived, living on n being able to hang with Hyakkimaru n be bros........................... can u imagine................. doing the forehead thing.............Hyakkimaru is like “another lil bro!! hell yeah dude”................. I cry...................

also Mutsu and Hyogo deserved so much better oh my GOD the number one crying scene for me was that one like theyre all like TEENAGERS!!!!!! and theyre all fighting n then these TEENAGERS fucking DIE!!!!!!!! like theyre Tahumaros friends and seeing him grieve for them......... it broke me dude........ even if those three were kinda out of it on demon energy at the time,,, theyre doing their best.......

also real quick i cannot believe they got me attached to a horse so quick only to just as quickly make me cry over it like fuckin rapidash was so good n she just wanted to get back to her kid and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

ok so now that scene im gonna be bitter about forever, like yea sure i GUESS given their personalities, and assuming Tahomaru was dying already with no hope of survival, i can see why they all just stayed in the burning fuckin building. I can even accept Nui (bio mom) staying behind. She had very big sad energy the whole series, and especially that episode was so gd depressed, and with her younger son dying on the floor. I think she was right to go to him (for once,,,, like i get one of her kids got sacrificed to demons n shit n thats super sad but ur just gonna ignore the other one?? also bad!!!) so i think her doing that was actualy a very nice gesture, and closed that up nicely.

But Jukai???????????????? what the fuck dude!!! get the fuck out of there!!! Theres no reason he shoulda stayed, besides his whole self sacrificing thing n i guess??? he decided thats what the goddess of mercy wanted???????? him to do???????? for some reason?????/ like if it had been daigo, sure that woulda made sense. but what the fuck??? Jukai kinda just felt like he died just to make that scene more sad, n felt super unnecessary.

ESPECIALLY since the last ep we saw him in at the end he had like regained his will to live!!!!!!!!! hence why the ghoul went after him!!!!!! it was explicitly stated that he got that back!!!!!! so why the fuck did he just throw that in the trash at the end there???? the only thing i can think of is him not wanting to leave Nui alone which like.............. I???? Guess?????????? but also no????? just fucking go and be with ur kid dude, what the fuck.

THEN theres Hyakkimaru just fucking bouncing after all that, no goodbye or anything just fuckin leaves Dororo which feels absolutely wild and kinda ooc, like ok......... hes going........ on a journey..... of self discovery................................................. then what was the whole series about?????? i guess in the original manga n such he left at the end, but it was for a completley different reason that actualy made sense n didnt feel so... weird n tbh kinda forced,,,,,,, but ahh whatever the last shot of them meeting again when they were older was cute so i guess thats,,, fine,,,,

I really fuckin loved this anime, the way they portray Hyakkimaru before hes gained any bits back, and as he slowly gains them over the series, is very good imo. they coulda easily been like “yea he can talk now!! so he can just fully talk cause weird magic :)” but instead we get to see Hyakkimaru struggle pretty realistically with every part thats gained back, which is kinda satisfying n nice in a way imo. I like it a lot. also the constant issure of “do the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few” is just so good cause like on one hand i fuckin love Hyakkimaru and want him to get his body back, of course!! but on the other hand, when you start to see the people of diagos land suffering and such,,,,,, and know that coulda probably been avoided if Hyakkimaru had just died (tho listen, deals with demons always go bad so probs smth else woulda happened) its fuckin sad as hell.

But also at the end when Hyakkimaru is just like “its my fucking body! give it back it doesnt belong to you!!” hell YES dude you tell them

also the way you feel bad for every fuckin person (except daigo, who can and should choke) is very very good.

anyways i know ive barely talked about Dororo here but thats because shes perfect and i have no criticisms, and also she got the happy end she deserved even if im sure she punched Hyakkimaru VERY HARD for just up and leaving when they reunited. but bruh, tbh thats exactly what he deserves for pulling a stunt like that lmao.

in any case, Dororo is an extremely good anime and I immediately want to watch all of it again, with the knowledge that in my AU daigo fuckin died after that camera cut away, and Jukai totally hauled Nui and Tahomaru the fuck outta there n theyre living on Hyakkimarus good good rice farm together happy n healing n good.

#tasha tells tales #i wanna write fic for this show so bad bruh #never in my life have i wanted to write some fic so bad #well see #probs not #anyways i need to sleep now #but i needed to proccess all this b4 hand cause #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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survivorelsalvador · 7 years

Text

EPISODE 7 - I Love Our Tribe And Don’t Want Anyone Out - Regan

(If a confessional is just a gif or a picture then it was most likely Veronica, winner of Jeju Island, uwu <3)

LILY

Well. My plans to take out queen Dana have failed. Luckily she still trusts me and kai. So I'm in a good spot. I trust Richie the most and hope we can make it far. But honestly I feel like I have no real alliances so I could be in trouble too. I wish that my immunity win wouldn't have been wasted on someone being med evacted. I wanted to make a damn big move! Haha oh well, I guess there is always next time. But I suck at trivia. Soooo it will probably be sooner rather than later. Wish me luck....

ZAKRIAH

brooke has always been better than flick idk why she gets so much slander flick is fucking stupid

KAI

AHHHHH WILLA WENT SO NO MORE STRONG MAJORITY ALLIANCE. *sad face*

ASHTON

*Talks shit about rob or whatever*

LILY

Sorta nervous that Dana will stop trusting me based off of my FTC speech in Bahamas. I hope this isn't the case but I'm a tad worried. Also I still feel like I have no real allies and I ain't gonna get 7th. Your girl really needs 7th or an FTC shortly or I'm gonna lose it. Hopefully we make merge after this vote but I have a feeling we will have one more immunity.

AUSTIN

Almost had a mental breakdown and quit because y'all think you're XD comical roflcopter funny!!!!!!!!! But you're not

DANA

"Heylo

1) Ashton and Richie are targeting me. Why? Probably because I never talked to them. This is 100% my fault. Oops. Glad we don't have to go to tribal this round because I literally sold my soul to the trivia challenge/

2) I'm trying to work with Lily and Kai in this game...after voting them both out of another game VERY recently... bad strategy? Definitely. Just bring me back to Willow and Zak.

3) I'm 99% sure the idol clues are leading me to something that has to do with... JLo. Honestly, wouldn't be shocked if I'm right, this seems like something Rob MIGHT do. If I'm wrong? This is going to be a VERY embarrassing confessional to read at the end of this game. If I'm right? We'll then things could be looking up for me! "

RICHIE

"awkward i loved for dana and she's still here because willa got another strike so i still havent talked to her or addressed the fact that she def knows i voted for her bc i completely ignored her before tribal because im a flop lmao.... i was going to throw the immunity so we could just vote her out again this time but then with the resistance that austin gave last round against voting dana + lily told me that dana/kai/austin/lily started an alliance before the last vote i didn't want to risk it so we won and yay i guess??? i need to step up my social game or like just talk to anyone because i'm sucking big time i can see myself being an early merge boot with the fact people might think im a challenge threat and my lack of connections.....

on another night im conflicted because when i found the idol it was with the help of chips i had asked him about the clues he got earlier in the game and i was talking with him bouncing ideas off eachother to try and figure it out and when i found the idol i said something so now he knows i have it which is fine because i trust him but im dumb i should have just kept my mouth shut and kept the idol for myself bc im going to need it going into the merge but i asked chips if hes getting voted out and he said no one on his tribe is talking to him so now i might give him the idol................. but if i give it to him and he doesnt play it and doesnt give it back i'll be pissed and if i give it to him and he uses it and he's not getting votes im going to be pissed... so the chances of me being pissed are like 66%??? idk im not good at math but its chips so ill do it for him if i think it will save him so that i go into merge with one good ally "

NICHOLAS

hi hey hello so i still don't really know what im doing so lets hope i dont go home ; - ;

JOSH

https://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/gremlins/images/f/fa/Gizmo.PNG/revision/latest?cb=20090920192843

WILLOW

I wanna vote out chips bc he doesn't talk a lot

REGAN

This round was hard because we have to vote Chips out, he knows hes going (might have an idol? says he doesnt). its just I love our tribe and don't want anyone out. I love willow but honestly Id rather have her out than Chips at this point because I adore chips. But I might as well go with my alliance or theyll get mad so.

CHIPS

"It has been a long time coming me making a confessional for this season.

I want to thank you hosts again for being so gracious giving me time to get settled in my new state and living quarters and being flexible with your requirements. I'm sorry it has taken me this long to give you my thoughts, honestly.

In summary of my experience so far - I don't remember much from the first tribe as I think we were only there for one round and then got swapped. If that is not the case it must have been at a time where I was barely on the computer.

We got swapped and I was the first picked in a schoolyard pick by Lily who's this really sweet person who really wanted to work with me in another side season that I was playing in!

Our tribe didn't have tribal and did really well and then we got randomly swapped again (I think it has something to do with the number of quitters?)

Anyway, that initial tribe did well in challenges and got clues and then Richie asked to see the old clues that I had gotten at other times and he deduced where to find the idol and he found it. And so that's cool...

When we got swapped the second time I got swapped onto a tribe where I had not been on a tribe with anyone else and it was a double tribal with individual immunity. I knew I had to win because of everyone I'd be the easiest vote since there'd be no previous connection.

I was immune and then this person named Bulgaria left instead. Anyway, then we had to do some trivia which was pretty fun until I got busy the next day and missed nearly every post of a question - our tribe lost and I was shocked to find that the hosts didn't even do that basic thing where you can give up all the points to force a tribe to go to tribal for an advantage that has become popular recently.

Anyway, our tribe is going to tribal so I message everyone to ask them about the vote and stuff and no one gets back to me except for Regan. Regan just wants me to give her a name so I tell her Zakriah because he was the last person of this group to accept my contact request having done so just at the end of the last tribal council.

Anyway, eventually Nicholas messages me to tell me that he thinks there's an alliance of Regan/Zak/Willow/Josh because they were all on that tribe together and that they are going to be voting between either me or him.

Richie messages me and asks if I think that I'm maybe going. I tell him that no one is really talking to me and tell him that Nicholas told me about that ""maybe"" alliance and he says he'll find out if he can send me his idol. Richie sends me the idol and tells me that I can play it to stay safe since no one is talking to me, but if it's not the majority vote he's going to be mad at me.

Well, I can't guarantee if this group of people isn't all self-voting since no one is talking to me so I am going to play it and vote for Josh instead of Zakriah. I figure that a random vote for another person if the rest are voting the other way will at least shake up some suspicion if there is a group as to who cast it.

Gosh! I really hope this isn't just a really inactive tribe and that there really is some secret plot against me. If not, these players all need to be medically evacuated as soon as possible, because trying to speak to them is worse than Mattie from Atomic Survivor Death Valley."

"[7:24:00 PM] Regan: what do we do [7:24:00 PM] Regan: I [7:24:37 PM] Chips: I... don't know tbh. [7:24:52 PM] Regan: I feel bad either way [7:24:54 PM] Chips: I mean, I voted Josh so I kinda wanted to stick with it. But then like... I dunno. :/ [7:24:54 PM] Regan: who flips in a merge [7:24:55 PM] Regan: honestly [7:24:59 PM] Chips: Me. [7:25:02 PM] Chips: I flip in a merge honestly. [7:25:16 PM] Chips: Like.. you really think I'm not going to. [7:25:17 PM] Regan: UR FLIPPING [7:25:18 PM] Chips: >.> [7:25:22 PM] Regan: well fuck [7:25:24 PM] Chips: When EVERYONE VOTES FOR ME TO LEAVE

Um... I?"

REGAN

THIS IS THE MOST STRESSFUL TRIBAL OF MY LIFE. BETWEEN ZAKRIAH AND JOSH AND I CANT VOTE OUT EITHER. BECAUSE THEYRE MY FAVES. AND LIKE ITS NOT EVEN FAIR TO ME.

#ididntconsent

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