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syrupspinner · 1 year ago

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i defeated Fae Tactics

i love how many tactics games need to put "tactics" in their title. imagine that with any other genre.

so theres a genre of indie game i like to call "that ratatouille gif". i have attached it for your convenience

you know what i mean. Bloodstained, Yooka-Laylee, Bomb Rush Cyberfunk, Palworld, its a whole thing. this is a dangerous genre to classify things into, because theres a very thin line between "taking heavy inspiration" and "being a sequel". like, its easy to say that Paradise Killer is a Kill The Past game with that got sent to the wrong address in the morphogenetic field. theres the moon symbolism, the assassins, theres literally a silver case for gods sake. but i cant call it a ripoff because it brings so much unique to the table with the worldbuilding, presentation, and gameplay.

thats how i feel about Fae Tactics. when it first lit that spark, inspiring me to play it for as many hours as i could as many days as i could until i finished it, i felt my childhood. i remember one of the first video games i ever owned: final fantasy tactics a2 grimoire of the rift. i played the ass off of that game, expiring everthing you could do multiple times over. it inspired a lifelong respect for the tactical rpg in my bones, and Fae Tactics scratched an itch ive been feeling for a while

i dont want to give the impression that im nostalgia blind, thats not the case at all. comparing a trpg to final fantasy tactics (even what i consider the worst game in retrospect - man the law mechanic was a pain) is like comparing a fighing game to street fighter. remember that time capcom tried to sue someone who made a fighting game that stole too many mechanics and design elements from street fighter 2. the court said, paraphrased, "sf2 was so influential on the genre that MOST games have street fighter mechanics now. like, platformers with powerups arent ripping off mario, that just how platformers work now." yeah thats what fft did too.

what im saying is, the game takes the fundamentals of the genre as estalished by its best examples, and builds on them in unique and engaging ways. monsters have a random chance of dropping cards, which lets you equip them as summons for the next battle. its great to have more experimental low-stakes party members. instead of focusing all your valuable main character slots on healers if youre going into a heavy damage fight, you can just bring a bunch of water summons to power through it and support your glass cannons until they end the fight pronto. or, you can have a lot of ranged summons that suppliment your tankier party members; or expendable summons to distract enemies while you buff your party. this is a huge strength of any tactical game - letting you stratagize in a way that is functional to your playstyle.

something id like to note is that there are tons of mechanics, but i only felt overwhelmed at the very beginning. by fight, like, three? i was totally in sync with the games tools and how to use em. this is tough. i remember by playthrough of zanki zero, where i got so overwhelmed by shikabane and character relationship gene splicing and the crafting mechanic and the cloning and the aging and the attack windup and those stupid tentacle attacks that i just fizzled out and gave up trying to comprehend stuff (until chapter six, but im getting distracted). i never saw a new mechanic in Fae Tactics that made me think "whats the point? im not doing this". instead, i was always interested in how i can use this new element to enhance my gameplay. its that classic theory of Get To vs. Have to. i never had to do the cooking minigame every time i slept - i got to play a game where i boosted my partys stats.

so how about the story? i think it was pretty good! each continent that you can explore has its own little isolated plot, and while it all connects in the end, i was worried it would fall into the same trap that i felt saints row 2 did. it didnt feel like you had a gang, it felt like you had 3 friends who all did their own thing and you helped. i think this is managed in the most effective yet realistic way - have peony as the center of the communication because its just her personality. shes doing the talking because shes just a friendly person with leadership skills. also like 1/3 of her party cant talk. the only hurdle then is making everyone feel too isolated - i wont lie, there are shades of that, but i think letting the characters relax in the background if they arent immediately relevant to a scene is a good compromise of this. like, your dog chico doesnt always show up in cutscenes unless they have a weapon upgrade or something. thats fine, cuz like, theyre a dog. itd waste everyones time if everyone chimed in every time anything happened. so its not like gat is inexplicably uninterested in the non-ronin gangs, its just that characters are allowed to be offstage if they dont have any lines. it really helps the group feel more cohesive and friendly, and in general it feels less like oure going on mission sidequests waiting for the area to clean and instead youre going on a real ass adventure

also, if i can be candid, matilda is one of the most badass characters ive ever seen. i love how her intro quest brings so much validity to the scrap youve been collecting so far as more than just "upgrade points". it really builds up peonys compassion and heroism when she puts in that much work to save the life of a stranger, and the time limit adds so much urgency while still being very generous, at least to my collectathon playstyle. finally i just love her character conceptually. shes a fairy that esentially rides her own iron lung like a mecha. the fact that shes lowkey the best ranged fighter in the game doesnt hurt.

closing thoughts. i was insane about this game when i first played it. like, i cannot bring myself to play anything else because im so enraptured about this game. im talking "oh yeah i guess i havent had a meal today" at midnight. thats how you know that youve got a very special game. also that i am very autistic.

#defeated #revisit #fae tactics

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calehenituseappreciation · 5 years ago

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I had the idea of Tommy’s clothes getting ripped not because he’s shit at surviving but because Dream ripped them each time he stabbed and slowly gave up fixing it until his first day of raccoon arc.

"Put your Armour in the hole tommy," Dream's masked face demanded the teen.

Tommy, being a stubborn teen, immediately refused, "No way! I worked for this armour myself! I earned it!"

Dream gripped the hilt of his axe, "The armour."

"No" Tommy said, holding onto the side of the metal.

Dream pressed his axe into Tommy's chest, not deep enough to wound but it still hurt.

"Okay, okay here!" Tommy shrieked, trying to take off the ruined armor as fast as he could.

Dream smiled and blew it up.

Tommy sighed as he watched his hard earned stuff turn into rubble.

He looked down at his chest. Dream didn't hit hard enough to leave a wound, but it did rip his shirt. He'd have to fix that later.

"Now what do you want to do?" Dream asked, turning around, sounding far too cheerful for someone who destroyed tommy's stuff, in tommy's humble opinion.

Tommy sat on his bed in his Trent tent. Dream had left Tommy an hour or a half ago. He was all alone so it was a good time to fix his shirt.

Tommy hissed as he pricked his hand with the sliver of iron he sharpened to use as a needle. Blood fell out of the wound and onto the shirt he was fixing.

"Damn it," Tommy hissed, grabbing some makeshift bandaids he made for himself.

He wasn't great at sewing. Usually Tubbo or Wilbur helped him with this, seeing as he kept accidently hurting himself whenever he tried. But now Tubbo is gone. And Wilbur is dead.

At least after he fixed it he wouldn't have to do it again?

Tommy had to do it again.

Multiple days in a row.

Everytime he thought he'd finally gotten over the dreaded sewing it came back to bite him.

Tommy looked at the numerous bandages covering his hands and looked at the holes in his shirt.

Tommy liked that Dream was visiting everyday. Everyday.

Tommy didn't want to sew anymore.

Tommy looked at the needle he made to fix his clothes.

What is the point if he'd have to do it again anyways? No one cared anyway.

Tommy hadn't really thought about his clothes for a long time after that.

He was cold.

He felt the cruel cold wind through the holes of his clothes, he leaned against the railing of his brothers house, snow falling fast.

Tommy blinked the snowflakes out of his eyelashes and smiled.

He was cold but he was free.

For the first time in a long time Tommy felt free.

"Where am I going to build a base," Tommy murmured, staring at the snow covered expanse, when he got the greatest of ideas and grinned.

Dream would never think of this.

He was free.

Tommy ended up fixing his clothes in his new base that night.

Dream couldn't hurt him.

"What are you doing here," Techno asked the next day, annoyed, but unsurprised, at the sudden appearance of his little brother.

"What are you doing here?" Tommy rebutted.

"I LIVE HERE," Techno said exasperation and confusion clear as day in his usually monotone voice.

"We'll you're in my room" Tommy said, purposely annoying

"THIS IS MY HOUSE," Techno exclaimed, exasperated.

"We'll its my room" Tommy said, his point was great, theres no way Techno could refute it.

"Explain. Now," Techno said angrily.

Tommy barely concealed a flinch at the tone of voice.

"Well you see- I need my disks," Tommy fidgeted

Techno looked no less confused, "That explains nothing"

Tommy would disagree, he thinks its a perfect explantion.

"Why are you hiding under my house. Like a raccoon," Techno stared at his younger brother.

Techno didn't take out a weapon, but didn't mean much to the teen, Techno could still hurt him if he wanted.

"HEY! theres nothing wrong with being a raccoon," Tommy huffed.

"Is this my stuff?" Techno said, looking through the chests.

Tommy had stolen Techno's things hes mad, Tommy's gonna lose everything again.

But then he didn’t.

By the end of the night Techno didn't blow up at him? Or even take back his own things?? he let tommy keep them??? And didn't hurt him?? Unless he had armour on?? And none of his clothes got ripped???

That night Tommy didn't need to fix his clothes again??

He's so confused.

Tommy had been living in Techno's house for a while now.

Tommy had taken off his armor for a second when a skeleton shot him.

It only grazed him but it ruined his shirt. It got blood on his shirt, and it ripped. Again. why do his clothes rip so easily.

Tommy walked backed back into their house.

Techno was reading a book with his glasses on, his pink hair was in a ponytail.

It was almost like before he left their home to go to Dream smp to begin with.

Especially the bleeding when being left alone for a second.

"Did you get hurt?" Techno asked not looking up from his book.

Tommy swears he can like smell blood or something. He bets he's reading a book about like greek.

"Yeah," Tommy said, Techno finally looked up seeing Tommy's ripped clothes.

"You look like you got hit by a truck," Techno said, putting his book down.

"My shirt has one rip in it" Tommy rolled his eyes, eating a gapple, the gapple would heal the wound so at least there wouldn't be anymore blood.

"Yeah and the rest of it looks like a quilt with how patched up it is" Techno said gesturing to blonde teen.

Tommy huffed, "It's not my fault I don't have any good clothes."

"We'll I can't just let my allies look dumb can I? Here follow me," Techno said, Tommy looked at him in confusion but followed the older.

Techno opened a chest and took out an untouched uniform, it was in the Antarctic blue coulor Phil and Techno were often found in.

"It looks pretty," Tommy said staring at the silver and blue in his arms, "I'm gonna change into this"

"Okay," Techno said, he had a small smile on his face.

Tommy smiled, hey at least he doesn't have to fix his shirt.

#tommy #tommyinnit #technoblade #sleepy bois inc #sbi fanfic #dsmp #dream smp #my writing #oneshot

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forsakenoathkeeper · 5 years ago

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I Am Alive (chapter 5/?)

Deviant!Connor[RK800] x (fem!)Reader Rated M(18+) for canon-typical violence and gore, medical procedures, and graphic sexual content

Synopsis: You were a mechanical engineer, now a nurse for androids, who moved back to Detroit after the revolution to offer aid. After reconciling with an old friend, you became rather acquainted with his android partner.

Please support me on AO3 & thanks for reading ♥

Connor wasn't oblivious to what he was doing.

'Rogue' was one word that came to mind; but, that was a bit extreme all things considered. He wasn't acting against the police and he didn't intend to commit any crimes, especially heinous ones.

He was hunting the android alone, without clearance, without jurisdiction.

-not like this was the first time.

He had intel that the human detectives didn't have. A good lot of them didn't respect him, some more obvious than others, and often disregarded his input on things. Of course, they were never hesitant to let him take the lead when dealing with dangerous individuals or gunfire.

Most of the time, it didn’t bother him.

Fowler saw him as a competent detective and needed the manpower, now more than ever. Hank trusted him with his life and stood up for him. That was all the recognition that Connor needed.

Having to work alone wasn’t all that terrible. He was faster, stronger, more capable of discretion... usually. He didn't have to worry about putting someone in danger or being slowed down. It also meant that he could-

-bend the rules in ways that only androids were capable of.

The other detectives were hung up on the possibility that Evelin Wheeler was murdered by someone she had crossed in her days as a lawyer. Connor had found seven cases that ended with death threats. Three of those cases, the plaintiffs or victims, were still alive and living in or near Detroit.

While other detectives were investigating those potential leads, Connor took to the streets to see if he could locate Robert. Maybe it was his programming talking; but, Connor was suspicious of the android.

Clouds were heavy and dark in the sky, the smell of approaching rain thick in the air. Connor was waiting outside of Haven in a nearby alleyway, perched up against a crate where he could duck back into hiding or lean out and see into the street.

He was standing near an abandoned warehouse that seemed to have suffered structural damage at one point, rubble having collapsed into the plot nearby. The towering structure was an eyesore and provided good cover for the detective. It was also across the street from Haven.

Connor fumbled with his coat pocket, fishing out a coin. He rolled it between his fingers as he waited.

You had been texting him, a very welcomed distraction from the monotony. Though, if Connor was being honest, waiting never bothered him. He couldn’t quite tell if it was because his android, a part of his programming, or just the way he was.

"u know u dont have to" was your latest message, popping up in the top right corner of his HUD. You had trouble getting your car started this morning and had taken a taxi to work. When Connor found out, he asked if he could give you a ride home.

"If I'm being honest, it is not just for your sake. I want to see you" he texted back.

It had been a little over week since he last saw you. Work had been hectic for you both, between countless damaged androids and Connor knee deep in multiple cases, one in particular that was rubbing him the wrong way. Even if he only got to sit in a car with you for thirty minutes, that would be good enough.

"i miss u too" your reply came in. Connor smiled at that and briefly pondered how to reply.

When people were 'an item', what did they do? Attending a restaurant together seemed to be the most common answer that came up in his searches; however, considering Connor did not require sustenance, and lacked the components to dispose of them, he couldn't eat.

Surprisingly, ‘drinking’ came up a lot, too. There was no way he was taking you to a sleazy bar. There were always clubs. Did you like that sort of thing? He didn’t want to make assumptions about your lifestyle. There was the added concern that Connor didn’t know if he could dance. He had never tried it before.

'Walks in the park' also came up in his searches; while Connor was not easily perturbed by the weather, you likely would find it far too cold outside. The local movie theatres were closed down temporarily due to the uprising, leaving that option out, as well.

He could invite you over to his apartment; but, what if you took that as an unwanted suggestion? He missed you in that manner, maybe more than he cared to admit; but, he didn't want to give the impression that it was all he cared about.

Connor's LED was blaring yellow as he internally argued with himself. He aggressively shifted his coin from one hand to the other and flung it high into the air with a flick of his thumb.

Humans did this - 'heads or tails' - so he tried it.

When it fell back down, he snatched it from the air, opened his palm and glanced down. The coin had landed on tails. Connor glared at the harmless nickel disk for not giving him the results he wanted.

Okay. Maybe he was thinking too hard.

-maybe he just needed to go for it.

"I want to treat you to something. If you would like that?" Connor messaged you.

Likely caught up in something, you didn’t reply immediately. So, Connor began rotating his coin again, rolling it between his fingers, flicking it back and forth between his palms. He had no idea where this quirk came from: if it was programmed into him or some bizarre string of code that manifested itself. He could do it without much processing power, making it rather relaxing.

"if you wanna? u dont have to do anything like that" your message popped up on his HUD some time later.

"Is it weird that I want to?" Connor messaged you back.

"not at all" you replied. He read it in your soft voice and found himself feeling bashful. He felt weird, like he wanted to do things for you - unnecessary things that you were perfectly capable of doing yourself.

"theres a park i loved as a kid. we can go when it warms up?" you offered.

"I would like that" Connor replied.

A thought came to him, something that he chided himself for: he had hoped for something he could do for you, now, not later.

But, then-

"until then i like ur apartment" immediately came in afterward.

Connor gawked at the message like an idiot for a moment or two before he snapped out of it. Maybe you had read his mind... somehow.

He had no need for a TV because he could get all the news on the interface in his processing unit. He didn't have a need for many dishes for obvious reasons and only bothered to keep the fridge plugged in in case Hank brought something over. His apartment was severely under furnished by human standards.

Suddenly, he wanted to change that.

"You are welcome anytime" he replied. "I'll make sure its warmer this time"

Your reply came fairly quickly; but, Connor didn't see it.

Movement caught his eye.

An android was approaching Haven, not that that was anything new. However, he dressed in a dirty hoodie and torn up pants, ankle-high work boots matching what Connor had seen in Evelin Wheeler's home, the correct height and stature for the model type seen in Louis’ memories.

Connor slid the coin back into his coat pocket and focused his optical sensors on the android. He couldn't get a good enough look from this angle to see into the propped up hood.

The detective waited outside while the other android crossed the threshold into Haven.

Markus wanted to do things the right way. Connor respected that.

It meant that he would inform Robert the police were looking for him and try to encourage him to speak with them. If he was innocent, that meant he had nothing to hide. But Connor knew that Robert would likely attempt to flee, even if he was innocent.

The android was inside the building for eleven minutes and some odd seconds before he stormed out the front and trotted down the street. Connor didn't waste any time taking up pursuit. The android had some haste to his steps, but wasn't running. Still, Connor knew he would lose him if he dawdled for a second.

Rain began to fall, beginning in gentle sprinkles that coated the concrete and asphalt in faint specs. Connor could feel the rain like gentle taps against his outer skin. It was useful: the noise made it harder to properly hear the sounds of their footsteps. That potentially risked the chance that Connor would lose Robert; but, it also meant he was less likely to be detected.

He needed an empty, quiet place where he could interrogate him. But, Connor also was well aware of the fact that he didn't have backup. If the android proved to be more dangerous than he anticipated, he would be alone and at great risk.

-again, this was nothing new.

Connor recognized the route Robert was taking. He was heading for the industrial district's harbor.

It wasn't abandoned. Factory work had resumed, albeit with struggles considering the android workforce had been lost. However, people were trying to return to normal life. They needed to; and so, the ports reopened and shipments starting to flow again.

The detective continued to stalk behind the android for miles, paying no mind to the fact that he was steadily growing farther and farther away from where he had parked his car, nor the fact that he was getting soaked by the rain.

When they arrived at the harbor, Robert took a path through a rundown building that was likely once a communication hub for a business that went under decades ago. It was longer than a direct route, but provided cover, less any of the human workers at the nearby plants spotted him.

In following, Connor realized that abandoned shipping containers were piled up outside. The rust and erosion patterns suggested they had been here a long time.

At the end of the row of containers, another building, a steel hub right at the edge of the water. Normally, these were open, designed to be for receiving and sending shipments, unloading. However, someone had taken the time to board it up.

Robert entered through a hastily cut out hole acting as a doorway.

Connor knew this was the end of the line. He was going to have to face Robert here.

He took one, careful step past the threshold, and realized there was an echo. That alone made it near impossible to continue sneakily. When Connor stepped forward, he felt something scan him. It was harmless, a perimeter censor: the kind of motion detector that could pick up android's serial numbers with a quick scan, and send alerts to the programmed android. It was, essentially, an intruder alert.

The detective turned his head to the adjacent wall. Sure enough, there it was, the size of a quarter, at head level, eyeing him.

He was intrigued that Robert had taken the time to setup defenses here. It wasn't particularly deterring, just a simple alarm that would prevent him from being snuck up on. Connor could hear Robert's shoes loudly squeak on the floor. He was pacing, probably deciding his next move.

Connor continued, turning down the hall and stepping into the main hull.

When Robert spotted him, he took a few steps back, maintaining distance between them. Connor took up a firm stance, feet shoulder length apart, arms crossed in front of him, hands cupped, like a soldier might stand.

"Why are you following me?" Robert called out, sounding more annoyed than anything else. The echo in the room was loud, creating an obnoxious tremor around them.

"I wanted to talk to you - ask you a few things," Connor replied calmly.

Robert was silent for a moment, eyeing Connor suspiciously. "You're the detective android," he said lowly. "I heard stories...” Robert looked him up and down. “You're not as intimidating as I expected."

If that was intended to insult Connor, all it managed to do was make him curious. What kind of images had Robert conjured in his mind of the android detective?

"Why haven't you removed your indicator?" Robert asked in a manner that was almost taunting. "You think we're equal to humans, don't you? Why wear something that sets us apart?"

"It doesn't matter to me if people know I am an android," Connor answered, maintaining his passive tone. It wasn't entirely the truth. Sometimes, he wanted people to know he was an android. He was once frightened by the idea of deviancy; now, it felt like a badge of honor. Maybe, he was prideful: he was the first detective android to join the force, and the last and only of his model.

"You work for the humans - against us," Robert accused. “What makes you think you have any right to stand with us?”

"I don't work against androids. I work against murderers," Connor proclaimed. He could see panic flash behind Robert's eyes. But, the android was quick to compose himself. "-human or android," Connor added on.

Robert opened his mouth; but, Connor, growing tired of this pointless banter, decided to be direct.

"I'm here because I believe you killed Evelin Wheeler."

"Who?" Robert asked, his head tilting to the side. From his lack of concern, Connor couldn't quite identify if he was being sincere, or just didn't care.

"An elderly woman who was being cared for by an android," Connor elaborated robotically.

Robert shrugged. "What makes you think I did that?"

"I saw you harassing the android living with her," Connor answered, tone lowering.

Robert settled a firm glare on Connor. "Harassing? I wanted to help him be free."

Connor kept his stoic expression, eyes unyielding of his emotions, LED strong blue. "I'm glad you remember them," he replied lowly.

The detective could see some stress rise in Robert. He wasn't frightened by Connor. He was growing steadily more and more angered by him.

"Then, surely you-"

"He was delusional," Robert interrupted sharply, clearly insulted. "Called her 'family'. I had to help him. He was being controlled by that human. I set him free."

"He was free,” Connor corrected him. “You hate humans. That's what it is. It has nothing to do with justice.” He maintained his persona: a cold, calculating detective.

The other android didn't seem to like that word. "You still elevate them above us, you hypocrite!" Robert snarled. "Don't talk to me about justice."

"Human or android, you killed an innocent woman in cold blood," the detective said lowly, letting his stare darken slightly.

"Where's your proof?" Robert challenged.

"Your shoes match the impressions at the crime scene," Connor stated bluntly. "You also were seen harassing the family-" Robert twitched at the word. "-a week before the murder. That's enough circumstantial evidence to obtain a warrant for your memories for that night."

"Where's your w-warrant, huh?" Robert challenged, his voice faltering slightly. "Why am I not under arrest, yet? You have nothing!" Robert shouted, his voice echoing around the chamber.

Connor narrowed his eyes slightly. "742-11-904, you are under arrest for trespassing on private property-"

Robert suddenly shifted and charged at Connor. Being a unit designed for industry work, he was bigger than Connor, bulkier with a wider frame and greater weight capacity; but, Connor was agile, flexible, and designed for combat. He avoided his assault with ease, but wasn't able to counter. His back hit the wall and Robert continued down the hallway past him.

Connor took up pursuit, finding that Robert took a different path out. He chased him into the harbor, out in the open, where security lights shined down on them. Workers from a nearby plant were perched on a balcony on the second floor. Connor could hear their surprised murmurs, "what the hell - you see that shit?"

Chain link covered the edge of the dock to act as a barrier to prevent falls. Connor contemplated pulling his gun on Robert; however, trespassing wasn't an offense worthy of firing, and he had yet to obtain the warrant he needed for the murder case. Pulling his gun would have been a one-way ticket to suspension, or likely worse.

Robert wasn't made for this. Connor was going to catch up to him. The android likely knew this. He had to take a path that Connor wouldn’t follow. He climbed the chain link, reaching the top before Connor got to him, and dived over the edge, straight into the harbor. The splash was drowned out by the rain tapping on the metal roofs nearby.

Connor looked over the edge to where the dark waters lapped at the concrete platform. Naturally, he couldn’t see anything through the murky water. He sighed, placing one hand on the chain link to lean against it.

"Well, so much for that," he groaned to himself.

It was unlikely that Robert could stay submerged for long, even less likely that he would surface here. He wasn’t going to return to this hiding place, nor Haven. Connor would have to find him through other means.

The rain started to pick up, sprinkling morphing to heavy droplets. Connor's eyes adjusted to lighting, or lack of, naturally. He was too focused on finding Robert that he failed to realize the sun had set. The time was normally hidden on his HUD as it was intrusive, distracting. He didn't need sleep. He didn't need rest. He could theoretically go days without a break.

When he brought the time temporarily back into view briefly, he realized it was 7:17. Your shift ended at 7 tonight, and he had promised he would be there.

"Shit!" he cursed out loud, swiveling away from the fence.

As he trotted away, shoes making wet sopping noises on the concrete, Connor started a message, "I'm sorry. I'm going to be a little late".

Before he sent it, he realized that he had missed your previous message.

"hold u to eet" you had replied. It was in response to his promise that the apartment would be warmer next time. But, it also struck him as a painful reminder that you had placed trust in his ability to get you home safely, and in a timely manner.

The rain continued to pick up until it was pouring down, like tiny rocks pummeling his body. It didn't hurt, but it was exhausting. He had fucked up, twice. He failed to capture Robert and now he was delaying you.

Instead of sending that message, he decided to call.

It rang once, then twice-

"Oh - shit - are you here already?" you blurted into the phone as soon as you answered.

"N-no, I-" he stammered. "I'm going to be late. I'm sorry."

"Actually - that's fine. I got so caught up in this thirium shipment, I didn't realize what time it was," you explained, sounding out of breath. "I was afraid I was keeping you."

"I wouldn't have minded waiting," Connor replied, feeling some relief at your words.

"No - don't say that," you scolded gently. "Don't take bullshit from anyone, Connor."

"Ugh-" he stammered. Did he take bullshit from people? Maybe he did and he just didn't care most of the time. Was waiting for you bullshit, anyway? He didn’t need to sleep, afterall.

"Working late, too, huh?" you breathed into the phone.

"Field work," Connor replied lowly.

You chuckled into the phone. "You know I can take a taxi if you're-"

"No, I-" he interrupted sharply. "I want to see you. Please."

"Connor," you breathed into the phone.

His phone wasn't a handheld device. It was an interface build into his processor. He could hear you directly in his head. Even through the slight distortion created by radio signals, the sound of your voice still managed to do something to him. Maybe he underestimated how badly he missed you.

In the background, Connor could hear one of your coworkers, "ooooo - who's Connor?" teasing at you in a purposely obnoxious voice.

You laughed quietly. "My boyfriend," you answered.

My boyfriend-

For some reason, something as mundane as you telling people that, made him really happy.

There was some shuffling noises, likely you moving around and trying to balance something in one hand and your phone in the other.

"Is he cute?" a different voice asked this time.

Connor was prepared to eavesdrop on this conversation in full; but, after some loud shuffling, you came back, speaking into the phone properly. "I'm gonna let you go, now - get this finished up - oh shit it's raining - let me know when you're in the parking lot?"

"Understood," he replied automatically, a habit. Plus, if he was being honest, he was disappointed.

"-and don't stress about it, Connor-" you added on hastily.

Fuck that-

-as soon as you hung up, Connor was running to his parked car.

#connor x reader #deviant connor #deviant connor x reader #dbh fanfic #rk800 x reader #rk800 smut #connor smut

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greatcomettexting2 · 4 years ago

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my little brother woke me up early. i am fucking pissed about clara calling me the “guy obsessed w her” again based on

the fact that she would have regular meltdowns when i didnt reply to her selfies (this has happened to multiple people)

the fact that she would post seven fucking tumblr vents when someone ignored her venting (this has happened to multiple people)

the fact that she would melt down when hearing me talk about ANY of my friends to the point where she got the name clara from a friend of mine named clara because i told her i loved that friend a lot and she would get pissed when i talked about him

the fact that i was like “theres no way thats where she got the name from” until she made several posts about how she was “worried she was stepping on kinnie toes” (re: my friend. what the fuck why would you say some weird shit like this) and then several posts in a row about “how she’d always loved the name clara as a kid” and how “it fit like a glove” even though she and my friend had never spoken ONCE

there is fucking record of this friend and how they used to go by clara with my spotify playlist and my pinterest board for him had that name on it and theres record of me telling him that she started going by his name and mentioned that she “didnt want anyone to think she stole that name from someone” what the FUCK

the fact that she went against someone’s wishes (someone who does not speak to her anymore) to not share their deadname their personal information their photos and their personal conversations in a special designated locked channel where she would gush over them each night

the fact that whenever ANY of these people drew boundaries with her she would first go “... I have no idea what you’re talking about?” and then jump into her nightly venting about her home and family life

the fact that whenever someone would share ANY personal information with her she would copy and paste this and send it in a vent channel

the fact that she acts like people saying she sends anons to herself and others is some horrible smear when her breath would get all shaky on call or her typing would get erratic during a rabbit stream after sending “Mod Steph is so cute and funny can I date him...” to ye olde greatcomettexting

the fact that this behaviour continued until 2020 and when i told her it was a little bit weird to get pissed and rude at me for three days without telling me what was wrong because i ignored her pictures. or her singing. or maybe a hamilton-type-beat monologue. she’d respond with “I get super mean when i’m high. You need to communicate these kinds of things to me, Jules!”

the fact that the crux of her calling me obsessed is not having any screenshots even though its REALLY fucking hard to pinpoint two people playing out your conversations with friends and relatives that theyve never met. also discord doesnt let you access messages from people youve blocked (worthy goddamned tradeoff.)

#SCREENSHOTS. THIS ISNT A CALLOUT this is me complaning about how your weird shit seems to have affected LOTS of fucking people #and also this blog has a very small audience im allowed to bitch as i wish

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illfoandillfie · 5 years ago

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Hi!! So I took a small class tonight about tarot cards and I’m SO EXCITED to start! Do you have any advice for somebody just starting out?

oh thats so cool, i’m excited for you! what sort of stuff did the class cover?

I’ve got 4 main points of advice but i’ve broken them down into smaller sections based on what i’ve used and what i’ve seen others talk about. Take what you feel works, ignore what you think won’t help or what sounds dumb or whatever. There are so many ways to approach tarot and what worked for me won’t necessarily work for you so test things out and play around with it. If you have any more questions about things i haven’t covered or if you want me to elaborate on anything or link some more resources please let me know!

Tip 1: Get a deck.

obvious place to start but having the cards is an easy first step lmao. there are also apps available if you can’t get a physical copy but being able to shuffle a physical decks will probably help you connect to it better.

I recommend something based on the Rider Waite Smith imagery because so much of the images inform the meanings of the cards and will help you learn - there are tonnes of different RWS decks out there, This one is quite bright, This one is a bit more muted in colour, This one has redone the art so it’s in the art nouveau style while keeping the RWS images, This one has modernised it so it’s not just white men on most of the cards

If you want some more suggestions for good decks for beginners I recommend watching THIS video or looking around youtube. Tarot readers/cardslingers/whatever you want to call them like showing off their collections. There are so many videos of people talking about which decks they own and showing off what the cards look like (even i made one lmao) so it’s a great way to get an idea of what a deck looks like and the size of the cards or even the weight of the cardstock they’re made with, even if you can’t physically touch them.

But the easiest way is to find a deck in your local bookstore and see how it feels for you. You want something you enjoy looking at, and that resonates for you because you’ll be able to connect with it easier

After that you can branch out if you want. Some readers only have one deck that they do everything with, others collect decks like people collect coins. Personally I like using different decks for different questions but a solid RWS deck will work for anything so if that’s all you feel you need then that’s cool too.

Tip 2: Start a Tarot Journal

this is what i did when i started. I bought a cheap notebook from the newsagency on my way to work and I dedicated 2 pages to every card. I titled them and then wrote down what the little white books that came with the decks i had said about each card as well as made notes on what imagery/symbolism was on each card. As I’ve learnt more I’ve added to these pages, observances i’ve made about when the cards are likely to appear, things i’ve seen other readers comment on (like someone i follow refers to the 5 of cups (i think) as the unrequited love card), relations to astrology, anything interesting i’ve read about the cards that i didn’t already have written down.

At the back end of the notebook I write down results for interviews i do with new decks

and i also have a section for particular spreads i like after all of the individual card pages but there are so many things you can write about in tarot journals.

i’ve seen some people do a daily card draw in the morning and write what the card could be referring to and then at the end of the day they write about what happened and how it related to the cards

I’ve seen others that try to relate song lyrics or movie quotes to each card to help them remember what the card means.

if you look for ideas on google or youtube i’m sure you’ll find examples of what people do with tarot journals.

Tip 3: Seek out info from other readers

One way to do this is books. There are so many book out there, especially for beginners, that talk about advice for reading cards, ways to help you learn the meanings, spreads that come in handy, etc. I read a book called Kitchen Table Tarot by Melissa Cynova when i was first learning and found it really helpful. But there are heaps of others out there too. Most bookstores will have a “new age” section so browse around and see if theres something you like the look of. Same goes for libraries. Or places like audible if you like audio books.

Podcasts are also a thing. I don’t have any specific recommendations but i’ve come across references to witchy podcasts so I’m sure there’d be something tarot specific out there.

Youtube is also brilliant. I love watching pick a card reading videos. It’s a really easy way to see how other readers interpret cards, what sort of systems they use. I like Siren Tarot and Charmed Intuition Tarot. They both read very differently. Siren uses multiple tarot decks in rows to figure out the story. Charmed is more likely to combine her tarot cards with oracle cards and she reads charms as well and sometimes uses a pendulum.

There’s also a witchy community on tumblr as well, so have a look around, maybe follow some people or lurk in tags.

Tip 4: Practice.

Read for yourself, asking different questions. Love life, career, friendship, family relationships, goals you have, whatever comes to mind. Do daily/weekly/monthly readings for yourself. Get a feel for how the cards operate. Start with one card, learn how to interpret it, what it might mean in relation to your question. Then add another couple of cards, see how the meaning gets clarified by what appears around it. Make notes as you go. This is where a journal comes in handy because if you write down what cards come up and what happens on those days you can start seeing patterns and that helps you understand the cards better next time they come up.

Read for others too. People you trust that you feel won’t make fun of you learning tarot or won’t talk shit about it. Close friends, family. Or, if you don’t have anyone irl, do what I did and let people ask for readings online. Start a specific blog for it if you want. It’s good if you know them irl because you can easily ask them how things turned out, see if you were on the money or if your interpretation was off then you can go back to what was drawn for them and see how it connects, if it does at all.

Don’t be afraid to read cards with the guidebook in your hand. That’s what they’re there for, to help you understand the cards. You can often get a sense of the card, if it’s positive or negative and what its meaning is, by looking at the imagery but use the books for as long as you need!

Create your own rituals around your cards. Some guides will tell you to sleep with your deck under your pillow or beside your bed so you can connect with it as you sleep, some will tell you to cleanse your deck in sunshine or moonlight or with smoke from a candle or by placing a specific type of crystal on top of it. Figure out what works for you. Cleansing can come in handy, especially if you do something that’s emotionally heavy, being able to clear that energy from your deck will give you better results in the next reading but if letting your deck sit in the moonlight sounds kinda crazy to you don’t do it. Personally, when i’m getting ready to do readings I light a candle and make a cup of tea or coffee. I’ll knock on the deck to wake it up and maybe pass it over the top of the candle if I feel like it. It’s about making a space you feel comfortable in.

Don’t read when you’re emotionally compromised. If you’re completely distressed and having the worst week of your life your results aren’t going to be as clear or accurate as if you’re in a more stable frame of mind. It’s why a lot of people like to meditate for a bit before they do readings. It lets them centre themselves and focus their energy on the cards.

Don’t be afraid of your intuition. If you draw a card and a phrase pops into your mind, include it in your reading. If you see something on the card, even if it’s a small image, and you feel like it’s important, mention it or note it down or whatever. It might seem like it comes from out of nowhere but it’s your intuition picking up on something small you might not even realise you’ve noticed.

#this got a little long oops #i just had a lot to say #and i've probably forgotten stuff lmao #i'm also going to start tagging this stuff as #tarot advice #so ya'll should be able to find it easily #if you ever want to #seriously tho #please feel free to come back and ask more questions or tell me if you try any of these and they work for you #i love the idea of helping baby tarot readers find their feet!#even if i'[d still class myself as a baby reader lmao #Anonymous

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corpsetalker · 6 years ago

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I think I just need to vent for a little while.

So my mom and I have lived in the same house all my life. I’m 25, almost 26 even. She was there before I was born even. And because it was just the two of us and she has worked 12 hour night shifts three, four, six days a week sometimes for my entire life, the house kind of fell into disrepair over the years. We couldn’t afford to get much fixed, plus both of us having anxiety and depression and not wanting strangers in our shitty house. Things just kind of kept getting worse. But eventually, recently my mom started working really hard to get her credit score up high enough to be able to get a loan for a new house which was super awesome.

December 2018 I came to Australia to live with my boyfriend and his family. I helped them move out of their old house, then we took a month-long trip to Japan, then came back and bought and moved into a new house. I started studying here got a student visa and everything. Unrelated but the point is, I’m kind of stuck permanently out of the US at the moment.

So my mom finally FINALLY finds a house and gets the loan and everything is set and ready and I’m so proud of her. Someone actually bought our shitty run-down old house. Good news right? So I wake up yesterday with a message from my mom saying that literally everything in our old house is gone. Not just the furniture and shit, literally everything.

So the buyer and my mom had a verbal agreement that she would be working 6 nights in a row and then starting on friday she would take 6 days off work so she could move our stuff out. Apparently, there was a “misunderstanding” and the buyer had his cleaning people come in early and take out literally everything in the house. Clothes, pictures, my moms multiple FULL piggy banks, there was one specifically that was big that she put gold dollar coins in. my computer, my guitar. 25+ years worth of 2 people's physical possessions. All just gone. Who knows where, kind of gone. Nothing anyone can do, gone.

She even went to the police but they said because the buyer claimed it was a misunderstanding theres nothing they can do. She called me crying about how she was a fool for trusting someone. It broke my heart. and I’m stuck in another country, theres nothing I can do. even if i didnt have school the tickets for flights between the us and australia are thousands of dollars.

It’s almost not even real to me to be honest, in a weird way. I’ve just felt so numb the last few days. I’m mentally stuck in this limbo of not being able to cry and being a fountain lol. It’s either completely on or completely off so i’ve defaulted to just holding it in because everyone here is terribly sick at the moment with giardia including my boyfriend and his two 10 and 11 year old siblings so I’ve kind of needed to be a rock. It all just. sucks. and I’m emotionally just. bleh. so sorry if im short with you ooc or dont even respond or whatever. i can’t say much for my reply speed because i try to do things to take my mind off of it and writing helps but i can’t just do that constantly. i dunno. its hard.

and its made so much worse because my boyfriend is 100% always my rock emotionally and physically and he feels guilty for being so sick when all this has happened. i dont blame him for being sick he cant help it but its hard. its just hard. and im. tired.

a new start i guess. thats what my mama and i have said. a reeaal new start but a new start. positive i guess. kind of? i dunno. its hard lol. everything i’ve ever had is gone and thats. wild to think about. sldkgs. rambling. ok im done. sorry lol.

#💀 ⌜ OOC ⌟ ™️#vent.#negative.

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aliceparsons22-blog · 6 years ago

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How to Design a Million Dollars Playing Video Poker

Ill level bearing in mind you if I knew some ordinary method for making a million dollars on video poker, I wouldnt be blogging right now. Id be in the Alaskan wilderness catching salmon or just sitting on my urge on porch cracking gain access to a beer.

So how can you become a video poker millionaire? The unchangeable is, there is no one unnamed method scr888 malaysia that will slant you into a video poker millionaire. Im suspicious of get-rich quick ideas of any variety. As a general rule, the less do its stuff something requires, the less full of life it is.

I can think of a few outside-the-box ways to put two commas in your bank account playing video poker:

You could win a million dollars playing higher video poker. Of course, youd have to win an unlikely number of future jackpots to sum $1,000,000 video poker later jackpots are considerably smaller than slot machines, resetting to with $500 and $1,500, and rarely paying off more than two or three time the reset amount. Dont forget how scarce difficult video poker games are you wont find a single cutting edge video poker game on the Vegas Strip or anywhere in Atlantic City. You could sit on putting child maintenance in the machine until you hit an uncanny streak of luck. Lets say youre betting max, $5 per tab and $25 credits per hand. If you could string together sufficient $30 payouts in a row, youd eventually win a million bucks. It would endure 200,000 straight 6-credit wins (to offset the coast of each rounds maximum bet), and would totally lift some eyebrows at the IRS, but I suppose its technically (given plenty decimal places) possible. You could have a essentially gnarly slip-and-fall accident though playing a video poker machine. If its found that the casino was negligent in inspecting and maintaining their property, youll be entitled to compensation, damages, and (in rare cases) a punitive praise expected to tutor the casino a lesson they wont easily forget. Its within the realm of possibility that you could win a million-dollar settlement. Of course, this is abuse of the system, and it would make you a horrible human being. It may backfire too the court may toss the warfare out, especially if there is no evidence of negligence. Those three ideas are beautiful far outdoor the realm of possibility. otherwise of slipping in a spilled drink, waiting for a mathematical miracle, or losing your shirt chasing progressives, I recommend a more level-headed approach.

The Three Basic Tenets of the Video Poker Millionaire The three tenets listed under arent exactly secret. Theyre freely-available every over the Internet. I can vouch for this fact, as Ive written dozens of blog posts upon these topics beyond the years.

Once youve moot how to function video poker, every you need to realize to (one day) create a million bucks playing the game is follow these three easy rules:

Learn Basic Strategy If you desire to have fun in Vegas and dont mind eventually giving your entire $100 bankroll to the casino, you dont habit to badly affect roughly strategy.

If your plan is to earn a million dollars from video poker, you have to become a graduate student of gambling. It helps if you have a fine library near your home, past some of the books youll desire to get into arent all that genial online. In fact, if you rouse close a own up the academy next a decent research library, youre a step ahead.

While youre at it, subscribe to some gaming magazines. If youre mostly going to gamble in Vegas, subscribe to some Vegas content, too. belong to a couple of forums. Depending upon where you live, you may be accomplished to find seminars in your area teaching legitimate video poker and additional game strategies. By the way, this isnt something you can attain when or twice a year for a couple of years and be curtains as soon as it. subsequently new games arrive extra strategies, and past additional casinos arrive new opportunities for advantage gambling. Youll essentially obsession to become a lifelong student of gambling and game strategy.

Choose Player-Friendly Games Unfortunately, the heyday of +EV video poker is long gone. You can yet locate a few high-paying titles that make a special trip to a specific casino or website worth your time. Specifically, theres plenty 10/7 Double extra and full-pay Deuces Wild upon casino floors in the gambling Meccas of America to save things interesting. If you are absolutely determined to earn a million bucks from video poker, you should probably stick to these titles only, past any new titles are going to keep too much of your maintenance more than time.

If you dont mind gambling a little (or waiting a few new years to earn your million), you can accomplishment some of the 99%+ titles that casinos still host. These are generally available whether youre online, in Vegas, in Atlantic City, or elsewhere in the USA. The so-called Not consequently ugly Deuces games (which we call 25/16/10) is well-liked and gives the casino a less than a quarter-percent edge, as complete most casinos versions 9/6 Jacks or Better, and the venerable 8/5 other Poker next a recompense of approximately 99.1%.

Casinos love to put sub-99% video poker games sharply adjacent to identical games set high. This is especially legal in the few casinos where you still locate full-pay titles. This means you absolutely have to inspect every pay table since you play.

Manage Your maintenance (and Earn Comps) The nice of dedication it takes to become a gambling millionaire means that it shouldnt be hard for you to rigorously control how much you spend on video poker. But past you should always bet maximum, your wager size and scope are lovely limited. instead of unbearable roughly bet sizing, focus on earning those crucial other relief casinos have enough money their loyal customers. That means joining the players club, exchanging club points for cash, scoring multiple-points promos, entering raffles and drawings, playing in video poker tournaments, remembering to mail in those bounce-back rewards clipping coupons, and pretense every those irritating things that tend to make a casino trip less fun.

In exchange for a tiny bit of what always feels afterward wasted time, youre putting a big dent in the casinos edge. If youre already playing +EV games, using comps basically extends your tiny edge. Not a statistically-significant amount at first, but more than time, it makes a huge difference.

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mysmedrabbles · 7 years ago

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Fourth of July with the RFA

Happy fourth of July to my American followers!! Sorry this was written so quick I got this idea like 5 seconds ago and I have plans for today whoops not the best time.idk why jumins is always the longest tf?

!!!Said RFA member and mc are in America for summer holidays with an American MC!!!

Enjoy!~

-mod alex

______________________________________________

Jumin

-when you told him you were planning a party for the fourth he got excited

-mainly bc he knows how classy most of your parties turn out

-when he shows up to a barbecue grill out with tiki torches, too much beer, something called a “sloppy joe” and 99 cent store American flag streamers he’s more than confused and slightly appalled

-also because hes literally wearing his best suit to a backyard bash

-finds a way to look more casual (you know, taking off the jacket, rolling up his sleeves, no tie, shirt slightly unbuttoned, aaaand now im nosebleeding)

-at first doesnt understand why the heCK there are sloppy joes its a mystery to us all

- is his normal charming self with your relatives you better watch out, that pervy cousin is making eyes at jumin

-makes a speech about american independence bc hes an extra lil shit and ends it with, “so therefore, if the british had never given america independence...i wouldve never met the love of my life. Happy fourth of july.”

-everyones drunk tho so no one really heard that but you and the one overemotional 4′5 aunt who cries at everything

-sitting on the grass and watching the fireworks show

-him putting his jacket around you when you get cold, you just leaning your head on his shoulder as he kisses the top of your head

-he doesnt understand sloppy joes but likes spending time with your family

Jaehee

-vaguely knows what its about

-buys you red white and blue flowers

-you guys go with your family to a local festival

-going on a merry go round together? you betcha

-going on a ferris wheel? ofc. kissing her every time the ferris wheel booth you guys are in goes up bc shes mildly scared of heights? y e s

-you guys eat some of the weirdest things, like fried butter? bacon and maple donuts? sloppy joes? fried cotton candy?

-playing the expensive festival games that are obviously rigged

-little did they know that baehee had prepared for this moment by practicing devil tricks with multiple youtube videos lmao

-she wins you a small stuffed panda and you cherish it forever

-walking around with her, hand in hand around the festival

-getting red white and blue streaks painted on your guys’ face

-kissing under the fireworks

Yoosung

-is so excited for this holiday

-i mean he loves all holidays but hes never experienced the horror fun of an American holiday

-you guys buy some wacky red white and blue sunglasses with “Fourth of July” written on top as well as those obnoxiously tall fluffy America flag hats (yall know what im going on about)

-”look honey! a fourth of july sale!” “yoosung, love, its the fourth Walmart we've passed they all have sales”

-trying various themed recipes together (granted since youre here for holiday and are at your parents, your younger sibling often intervenes)

-"moooooommm mc and her boyfriend are kissing in the kitchen againnnnn"

-him back-hugging you as you stir fry some shit idk cooking lingo all I eat is doritos and ramen

-kissing your shoulder as you finish making the decor on the America themed cake

-him getting along great with your family and fitting right in

-it seems so natural, how easily he smiles and cracks jokes with your parents

-wants to help with the barbeque but thats your thing to do and you will stand by that

-him buying you roses

-both of you guys playing tag with your younger siblings and cousins you guys lost

-when the fireworks start he probably yells out a scream from shock

-flinches every time one of them goes off so you guys go inside and move the couch so that youre still facing outside but the door is shut so no noise

-making out when it gets dark

-he tastes like cake and strawberries

-with the fireworks in the back y'all look like youre in a disney movie

Seven

-stay in watching documentaries on the revolutionary war

-you guys just mute it at one point and he starts doing silly voice overs for the show

- “I’m mad at some dudes so I’ll lift up my hat at you while I row away with these big guns and all your husbands and sons hrrrrrr”

-eating red white and blue candy and drinking an inhumane amount of Dr.Pepper

-you drag him outside to the park to watch fireworks that the neighbors are throwing

- “look theres one!!” “ah did you see that one??” “that one was so pretty!” “damn you just missed a really big one”

-you guys would hang out in the park until three am just enjoying each others company

-yall would probably go on the kids playground and goof off, playing on the swings, going down the like,,, three foot long slide, just being little kids

-any holiday is the best holiday with him

Zen

-he sings the star spangled banner 😂

-he's got an amazing voice but youre p aure hes holding the last note just to show off

-you guys buy matching tshirts that say "sloppy joes come and get some this is AmErICa" with a picture of childish gambino dabbing bet you wished it said smtn abt sloppy joes now huh

-going down to the beach for the day

-getting one of those giant donut rafts and just chillin together y'all better hope you aint on the west coast w one of those

-a tickle war breaks out, resulting in you falling off the raft

-zen dramatically "saving you" its like 6ft of water people cmon

-him giving you mouth to mouth cpr even tho you dont need it so basically y'all are just making out

-going to a local restaurant for sloppy joes burgers and fries

-new drinking game: every time I say sloppy joes , take a drink

-going on the boardwalk at sunset and watching the fireworks from the cruise ships

-he cant stop staring at how gorgeous you look, staring at the fireworks like theyre magic

-cant help himself from kissing you

-late night pretzels

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boymeetsweevil · 8 years ago

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BTS as (weird) babies in your daycare

Kim Seokjin

The oldest of the bunch

brings two designer brand lunchboxes in to school

his lunches cost more than yours do

he eats all his food and then will go around the lunch table asking the others for small bites of their meal and they usually give in to him because he shouts “but we’re BROTHERS >:O” if they say no the first time around

the one that likes to take you by the hand while you’re in the middle of paperwork or something and bring you to see that castle he was working on

you compliment him on it and then you’re dismissed like:

“Wow jin that’s a great castle you did a great job stacking the blocks”

“Thank you teacher can you leave now?”

And you go back to your paperwork feeling kind of small before you remember that you are more than a decade older than the tiny child that sent you away

not the bossiest child (that’s jimin) but is a close second

is the most catalogue looking child you’ve ever seen

when you’re bored in the classroom during naptime and you play with your phone, he’s the one who only slept for 20 minutes

he then proceeds to come over and sit in your lap for a chance to play with your phone

You open up snapchat and play with the filters with him in the dimmed playroom and listen to his little chime-like giggles

his selfies are 80x cuter than yours before the filters and when the little dog ears come out to play you have no chance

Always brags about his older brother being able to use shoes “with no velcRO and long LONG lOng stringlaces” (=shoelaces)

hoseok always yells back that there’s no such thing as shoes without velcro “unless youre a growned-up and your hyung isn’t a growned-up i saw him at the park hes just a kid too!!”

Always brings in crafts that he made with his au pair for the class

currently has an obsession with hearts so he has been bringing in crudely cut heart shaped cut outs with scribbly stick figures on them

everyone got one, even you

he also made sure to draw himself into everyone’s heart as well

in the one he made for you its clear he drew himself first because he’s normal sized and you’re gigantic and bending horrifically around the edge of the heart because he didn’t plan the spacing well

Also brings in the best group snacks when its a holiday or his birthday

cries when you tell him its not okay to sit on the other boys when they bother him

Always wants to be your helper and repeat what you just said to the class like he’s your assistant he is SUCH a teacher’s pet

“can i be teacher jinnie?”

“ummmmmm...not right now, maybe later okay?”

“oh...When im bigger???”

“uh Yes! when youre bigger”

“okay....Teacher im bigger now”

gives you wet cheek kisses :’)

He has the CUTEST laugh and when he laughs you laugh because its one of those rolling baby laughs that just doesn’t stop and you find yourself chasing him around the playroom to hear his giggle even though your feet hurt

drinks more milk than anyone in the class

as a result he has the NASTIEST farts

Min Yoongi

The one who has been coming the longest but still takes a good 45 minutes to stop sulking after being dropped off before he’s in the mood to play

will legit stand by the window to watch his mom drop him off every fucking morning like he doesn’t know where she’s going and if she’s coming back

when you come over to see if he’ll play with the other kids, he just turns and pouts at you and whines a little and turns back to the window

When he’s not in a funk though he is the most mature kiddo

Plays the best by himself, and is very simply entertained

brought in some homemade maracas for his show and tell day

it was literally just a recycled cardboard container with dried beans in it that he had scribbled all over with 40 different markers

keeps calling it “makaka”, you try not to laugh you fail

he just sat on the edge of the rug in the playroom and shook the box of beans softly to himself for an hour

when the shaking stopped you came over to see if he was alright and you realize he fell asleep

is surprisingly chatty

probably has the best vocabulary or is tied with joon

but also probably ahead of joon in terms of working vocab because while joon knows how to use “extraordinary” he also can’t grasp what the slide is called and yoongi has him beat there

ALWAYS FALLS ASLEEP first

sometimes will ask if he can start nap time early and drags the pillow and blanket the parents bring in from home up to your desk to make a more convincing argument

is always patient zero and gets fevers really easliy

when that happens you have to carry him around while you putter through the classroom and rub his back while he sleeps it off

you have to shush the other kids while he sleeps because theyre always so loud when they ask “Is Yoongi SICK???? :(”

he sleeps in your lap during nap time on those days and you stroke his fat fever-rosy cheeks when he whines in his sleep from the heat

cries whenever taehyung says his drawings are ugly

but they are, especially if he draws you

theres always this weird expression on your face and sometimes you think about it when youre up late at night and then you cant sleep

is full of full facts about insects because his dad reads about them before bed

and is apparently always at the library

you saw him there once and he almost exploded because what are you doing outside the school

“teacher what are you going here”

“i came to get some books just like you”

“but i thought you couldn’t leave the school”

“i can leave the school...”

“wont you get a time out?”

“um no sweetie”

Yoongi has a huge sweet tooth and gets super excited on fridays when his mom packs him like chocolate milk or something

can never open the little carton so he brings it to you and just vibrate next to you until you poke the straw in

pretty sure you saw his eyes roll into the back of his head once while drinking it

has fallen asleep with the carton in his hands on multiple occasions

HAS THE SWEETEST BABY LISP YOU’VE EVER HEARD

when you bring your guitar in for music days he sits at the front and listens SUPER intently and always tries to come over and touch it while you’re playing so have to be like

“yoongi, sweetie, please sit down”

“um okay. teacher ? im gonna play the giddar too okay?”

“while I’m playing it?”

“Yeah :)”

“no yoongi.”

“Okay...teacher?” REPEAT 1-6

Jung Hoseok

This kid is all over the place oh my god

srsly he is always tripping on shit because he is always running

and his jeans are a little too long because they're hand me downs from his sister and he refuses to let his dad put a belt on him in the morning

loves to hold hands but his hands are always so so so sticky

like wtf

he will want to hold your hand during walking field trips and you want to just yank your hand away and wipe it on your jeans and douse it in hot water but you don’t because he loves to hold hands and his hand is small and soft and warm and you don’t want to hurt his feelings :’(

you compromise by helping him when he’s at the sink and make sure he uses soap

probably the one who won’t stop putting his hands down his pullups

not in a weird way but in that way where kids will develop some weird habit/quirk that they do on autopilot for comfort

He probably tests your patience the most because is also: THE LOUDEST

he is that kid that screams bloody fucking murder when you turn the lights off for naptime, every day :)

but not to be funny because he’s scared of the dark

he was originally placed somewhere else but he kept getting up in the middle of nap time to drag his blanket and pillow over to you to sleep nearby

when you asked him what he was doing he said that he sleeps near his big sister when he gets scared and you have to bite your knuckle not to cry when you realize he counts you too

Speaking of big sister, dawon goes to the day care for older kids on the floor above ur classroom

sometimes the teacher upstairs will let her come down to say hi

she stands by the doorway and watches him play with stuffed animals for a few minutes before going “hooooooobiiiiiiiiiii” and he drops everything to run over and she pets his hair and asks if he’s being good in that way where you can tell kids are parroting some random adult

tbh this is your least favorite time of the day because he always wails because she can’t stay but he really misses his big sis and makes you tear up a little too

Sometimes another teacher will come in for “Body Time” and does yoga stretches with the kids

hobi is such a whiz at body time and always does the stretches with a surprising amount of control

its probably his second favorite thing next to running in literal circles in the tall grass during outside time in the spring

He’s a bit of a perfectionist because if you move his dominoes out of the little rows he made, even by just a fraction of a millimeter he. will. lose it.

Also won’t eat food that touches or crusts of bread or fruit skins

but he will eat orange slices without fail as long as you “make them into pieces first teacher :’(”

always gets stung by bees?????

because: yoongi likes bees a lot, he thinks theyre cute and interesting and he always takes hoseok by the hand to the nearest hive to tell him facts and point at things with a pudgy finger

but you’ve told the kids time and time again not to go near beehives but yoongi loves bees too much and hobi startles easily and either jostles the hive or pisses off a nearby bee

Kim Namjoon

Is the only one that can read

you were super shocked when you came over to him one day looking intensely at a book and he was confused and you were like

“what’s the matter, joonie”

“i can’t find the kittens in the picture”

“What kittens” and you read the little blurb on the page and see the word mittens and you’re like oh shit he can kinda read

so now you make sure he reads a different book from the bookshelf each day

jimin is always demanding to be read to and joon is happy to do it even when jimin switches pages on him in the middle of the book or asks to start over or start another book

Has those little baby glasses that tie behind his head so he can see

he always drops them though because he fiddles with the tie in the back and they get too loose throughout the day

He’s one of the more affectionate kids in class and will cling to your leg when he’s having a rough day

doesn’t want you to pick him up unless you’re sitting because he’s scared of heights

will sit on your lap any time its free though

often competes for lap space with kookie and often loses because kookie runs faster or joon will fall because this is joon we’re talking about

hes a good sport about it and stands next to you and asks kookie when his turn is next very sweetly

No surprise but namjoonie is always falling

but he never gets majorly hurt

maybe he scrapes a knee or a hand or something minor

he doesn’t cry much either hes a tough cookie!!

he’ll tell you a fact about prehistoric jellyfish with a wavering voice and watery eyes while you put his bandaid on

Baby Joon LOVES LVOES LVOES apple sauce

he cannot get enough of it and MANY of the stains on his little cords (his favorite clothing item) are apple sauce stains

Namjoon is sadly that kid that will eat anything though so you’re constantly watching him to make sure he doesn’t eat anything deadly

when he’s being too quiet or still in the corner of your vision you walk up quietly behind him and just stick a hand out and he spits whatever it is into the napkin in your palm with a goofy smile

eats his boogers probly :(

Joons mom always brings little treats for you because she was worreid that he would be bullied or isolated when she first enrolled him in the class but he’s doing well and she’s glad for the atmosphere you’ve set up

sometimes she sends him in with your treat if she’s too busy in the morning so he’ll totter in with his glasses and what looks like some homemade cake and your can’t help but scoop him up and plant a kiss on his cheek and tell him to tell his mom thank you

his best friend is probably jin because jin knows the alphabet and appreciates namjoon’s knowledge

jin helps joon get over his fear of the swings, but he’s still scared of heights i assure you he will start to wail if you take his feet too high off the ground

cries when he spills his apple sauce which is often but he always has a spare

but! you’re not sure if his mom packs it because he loves it so much or because he’s bound to drop one

Park Jimin

When he first came in to school you gasped because those cheeks were a gift from above and the little always-there pout was so cute

he lives for praise, he is such a ham and he loves the way the old ladies at the front desk always try to bribe him with candy for a cheek pinch

he’s a shrewd little business man and won’t let anyone touch his cheeks for less than 2 soft caramels

Park Jimin is as bossy as they come

but everyone in the classroom has no problem with it except maybe you sometimes

he is always going “Teacher! Come here!” from somewhere in the room and you always have to go “You want to try that again, Park Jimin?” and he goes “Teacher! PWEASE come here!” and ur like...ok

Fairly independent

his dad assured you he knows how to cut with regular scissors but jimin continues to use the kiddie scissors and then act like he can’t do it and blink up at you for help

he just wants you to watch him do it

can also put on his own snowsuit without help but still wants you to do it for him because he LIVES for the personal attention

Is a tiny bit violent?

will yell really loud if you take his truck or his dino dolly

or if you make him try to take off his favorite faux cowhide sweater when its time to paint

never hits/kicks/bites tho

the one time it looked like he might hit jungkook you were there in an instant to pull him away and give him a calm and quiet but stern lecture about why his hands are not for hitting or hurting

he had frustrated tears welling up in his eyes when you brought him back to JK and had him use his words

“Kookie, I dont like when you take my toys when im still playin wif dem”

JK: *is preverbal*

and you pry the toy out of jungkook’s freakishly strong baby grip and return it to jk

Jimin’s best friend is probably tae

their moms are friends and they regularly have play dates at each other’s houses

sometimes they come in together in the mornings if one mom is busier than the other

they sleep next to each other during nap time

Chim cries when he can’t sit next to tae during snack time

Has a very adult palate for a baby

i.e. he loves vegetables

is kind of nosy and will come over to your desk when you open your lunch bag and ask to see the vegetables

you make sure to always pack a veggie because the one time you didn’t his eyes widened and he said “mama says you die if you dont eat no veg-ables”

asks if everything is a “veg-able”

jimin: *points to sandwich* veg-able?

you: no

jimin: *points to kimbap/turkey leg/piece of cake/bag of chips/an apple* veg-able?

you:....no

if you did bring a veggie that he doesn’t already have in his lunch, he’ll ask for a bite

normally you have to tell kids no when they ask for your food because you’d end up with everyone asking for a bite and no lunch, but no one else likes veggies in the class.

so sometimes you slip a sliced cucumber to him and he holds it in two hands and runs back to his spot to eat it and then comes back like an outdoor cat looking for more food

Has a lovely singing voice

its high and pretty, kind of angelic and he tells you that he sings for his grandma a lot

you praise his singing so naturally he loves music day too and if you sing a song he sings with his mom at home he gets so excited

yoongi is enthralled when jimin knows the words to a “teacher song” before its been taught to the class

Kim Taehyung

idk why this is so pertinent to my idealization of him as a child BUT: Has the biggest head out of anyone in the classroom sorry

is so so so cute, might even be your favorite..

he’s super agreeable

loves to cuddle, eat all his food in his little stackable lunch containers, naps well, plays nicely with others, listens pretty well

BUT

he always pees himself :(

and you don’t understand it because his dad came in and bragged about how much of a big boi his son is at home in the bathroom using the toilet but at school? NOPE

he has like 8 changes on clothes for this reason

you can always tells when he’s about to pee himself because

he stands in the middle of the room and just goes “sorry teacher” really softly

your heart breaks when you hear how sad he is that he wet himself but you’re also a little irate because you’re convinced no one deals with as much pee as you do

you give him the talk every time which consists of your wriggling him into some ridiculous pink overalls while trying to make eye contact with him so you can tell him that when he feels like he has to go, he can just go to the potty

Tae carries a blanket around at all times!!!!!

he takes it everywhere with him and uses a different one to cover him up during nap time.

cries on the days that his dad drops him off without it because it has to be washed

the blanket was purple at one point but now it is straight up grey-brown

is surprisingly good at walking/running with it and not tripping on it

Jimin started calling him tata

so now everyone calls him tata

Is probably the class sweetheart as well

when he’s out sick, literally everyone goes “where’s tata” at random times of the day even though you went over who was “at school” and who was “at home” and said he was at home

tae is so so so so good at drawing its crazy

hes way above his age grade in terms of drawing BUT he has a little trouble getting a pencil into his grip

so you have to help him finagle it into his little hand but once he does WOOO here comes a dragon with you on its back holding a big ol sword

Is that one kid who manages to run around naked the most

its probably because you’re always in the middle of changing him when someone else distracts you and you turn around and all of the sudden he’s naked as the day he was born from the belly button and waddling back to where jimin is playing with flubber on the rug

you have to run over and scoop him up but also hold him at arms length because hello? pee?

he thinks this is hilarious and flaps his arms like hes flying

Everyone kisses tae

like when the kids get to that stage where they all try to kiss each other because their parents probably kiss them and they're like imitating their parents

everyone goes for tae

he takes it like a champ

but his face is probably v sticky after wards so you pull him over and take a wet wipe to his face

might ask you for a kiss and you place one on his LARGE forehead lol

His grandma comes in often with dolls she made for the class

tae shows them off proudly during his show and tell days and makes sure everyone plays nicely with them or theyll break because theyre normally made from soft yarn

He has a major thing for stickers and is always asking you for stickers to adorn his whole body with

you are constantly telling him to take stickers off his face and sometimes he puts them on his eyebrow and you sigh because crying is inevitable at that point

you have limited him to 3 stickers on any given day and they go on a piece of paper labeled “Taehyung’s Tata’s stickers”

was mad when you tried to write his full name on the paper because he is tata at school >: (

Jeon Jungkook

the youngest! a true baby

when he first came to the classroom he was right in the middle in terms of age so like he technically aged out of the nursery down the hall but he wasn’t at the normal age minimum to enter your classroom and you were like Ummmmm i guess he can come? because you didn’t have very many kids so what’s one more right?

Started walking and running in the same day during his first week at the classroom!!!

you were worried he’d be too small to keep up with the other kids and might be hurt with their type of play but nope

he was constantly crawling after them trying to keep up until one day he just...stood up and you were like omg and pulled your phone up

when his parents came to pick him up you showed them the video and his dad cried

Now he’s the fastest runner in the class

he doesn’t really talk yet

hes still preverbal but you can tell he gets whats going on around him

the others are good about it

although you did have to have a day where you addressed the question they kept asking you

“Why doesn’t kookie have words?”

“he’s too little. but he’ll talk when he’s ready”

it was a short talk

He knows two words

no and something that is the approximation of hyung but you’re not certain

if he wants your specific attention he just goes “AH” really loud

says no to everything even when he means yes

this means that when you ask him if he wants to eat snack he says no and then cries when you put his lunchbox away thinking he may actually not be hungry

despite being the best at toddling, he always wants to picked up

he is such a teacher’s pet its crazy

its probably the one piece of evidence that he is the least mature of the group

and also because he misses the presence of his mom

he will settle for sitting in your lap when you’re at your desk

or when you’re trying to read to the group during “carpet reading time”

he will try to turn the pages for you but it took him a while to realize you weren’t always done reading when he turned a page and you’d have to fight him to turn the page back so you could finish

now he waits for you to say “you can turn the page now kook”

He is so so so shy omg

if a teacher from another classroom comes by to borrow something, they naturally try to come over and say hi to the one kid who you’re carrying on your hip or sitting in your lap and he just turns and smushes his face into your armpit until he suspects they’ve left

he does, however, have a weird obsession with the handyman that comes in to repair that one tricky light in the back of the art closet

kook will stare at him until he leaves and its cute because he’ll leave your lap or whine to be put down and toddle over to watch him work from a “reasonable distance”

the repairman is kind of gruff looking but he always turns and spots kook watching him like 8^O and will snort

one time he handed kook a rubber band that he had in his breast pocket and kook kept it clutched in his little hand all day

actually waves goodbye when he leaves its so precious

Kook is very sensitive to touch and stuff

so in the winter when he has to wear layers he cries a lot if the t-shirt under his sweater bunches up the wrong way

like he’s so finicky about tactile stuff

he can’t have bare feet ever

wears slippers all year, even in the summer

also cries if the classroom gets too loud and covers his ears

you think maybe he may have some sort of sensory sensitivity

won’t eat the bananas in his lunch unless you mash them with a fork for him

cried when you cut open a pumpkin to show the kids the seeds inside and later roast them because the smell was too strong for him

you had to put a tiny face mask on him to get him to calm down and he resembled a ninja turtle the whole day

He loves hobi very much and is always super giggly when hobi pays extra attention to him

always follows him around and is constantly bumping his nose on hobi’s back because he follows him THAT CLOSELY

always fights with jin

meaning he constantly swipes toys out of his hands and then sometimes gets sat on as punishment and cries until you heft jin off him

you don’t know why they always fight

is so good at hidden item picture books like Ispy

you will zoom through them because he finds everything immediately and you wonder if maybe hes a genius

you had a hunch one day and put him down in front of a 400 piece puzzle and he did a surprisingly good chunk of it in the span of the school day and went straight to it the next day

I was trying so hard to write this and couldnt think of anything and then i remembered yesterday that my friemd Worked in a daycare for the last three years??? so a lot of this is real life stuff which is funny but also really extra

all pics are from weheartit...

#bangtan bookclub #bttnetwork #95line.net #hyunglinenetwork #btswriters #bangtan #bangtan fanfic #bangtan reactions #bangtan imagines #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts reactions #bts fanfic #bts #bangtan sonyeondan #bangtan scenarios

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zisung-archive · 7 years ago

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YEEESSSS omg definitely. I Love silent co-exsitence it's my favorite type of hang out :( my friends always want to be doing something when together (NOT THAT IT'S A BAD THING in case one of them is reading this 👀) and i just long for us to more often relax. But again. It's completely fine. Studying like that also sounds so relaxing and it saddens me that i can only study when in complete solitude if even then i'm so easily distracted. To me it'll probably never sound boring though!! - date anon

yeahhhhh i dont like it when i hang out with someone and always after brief silences or a lack of majorly exciting and exhilarating activity they have to point out that its awkward or lame SORRY BUT them pointing it out is the only thing that makes it awkward…………………..generally my friends arent like this but usually like. newer friends maybe. well i do have one good friend who ive known for longer who is just really insecure about being “boring” company and he constantly needs the reassurance that even if we sit in silence its FINE its good and even though i like him a lot its sometimes exhausting to hang out with him for multiple days in a row ajsgdkashd NOTHING against him though like i totally get being insecure about that. but as i said i relish it when i hang out with people and theres this nonchalant atmosphere with neither an obligation to talk nor to remain silent. without fear of one of you feeling like it may be awkward. thats soooo nice……….funnily enough it almost always comes to these quote awkward silences when i am on dates with dudes idk not to generalize but lots of em seem to not get the concept of comfortable silence i hate straight dates khGDKJAHGSDJAKÖSF i never look forward to them kinda hate myself for it. but hey studying alone is totally understandable i get it. i used to also not be able to get anything done when studying in company but i kinda taught myself it helps when youre in public places such as a cafe and or if you both listen to music!!!!!! yeah. and yeah i agree its definitely not boring!!!!!

#date anon #anon #ask

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mollydollyjournals · 4 years ago

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Friday 4th June, 158lbs. I kinda wanted it to be lower but at least its lower than yesterday. And the scales did flicker to 157.8 a lot so maybe I'm like 157.9 or so. Idk. Either way, official weight for today is 158 flat.

I'm trying to get used to my new phone. It's not a new model but it's new for me. It's a Samsung and i just found the whole samsung health section that has so many extras. I used the step counter today and it says I did 4800. I think it's less than that - sometimes it was a little too sensitive I think. So I'll call it 4500. Theres also a food log thing that has a lot of branded foods, which is great, but I'm kind of annoyed that some of them aren't completely accurate. I guess most people wouldn't notice heh. It also doesn't round up like I like to (I mean of course) so I'm just rounding up my end result by a lot more to make up for it. So today I'm at 600kcal, which is good considering I also walked for an hour (mostly kind of leisurely pace though so that's why the step count isn't higher).

I feel really tired and disoriented today and I really wanted to just lie in bed and drink wine. I'm glad hb was able to come for a walk today - I would have tried to do something by myself if not, but I don't know how much I would have got done. Hb can drive us to nicer walking places anyway.

So I managed to distract myself from drinking. That's 3 days in a row which is the most I've managed probably since early April. I have my second covid shot tomorrow...I'm really hoping that doesn't throw me off again. Most people seem to have bad side effects from either one shot or the other but not both, and since my first dose was so bad I'm hoping this time I'll be okay. It threw me off so much. In March I was getting to an okay point and then I had the jab and all my symptoms flared and I started drinking too much again and just...not good. I don't want that to happen again. I need to stick with this and control my drinking and food and do some exercise and lose some fucking weight.

I'm a little better set up now than I was in March though, just in case. I have more things I can distract myself with rather than drinking and binging. I just really hope it doesn't do that. If I can keep my momentum going I can lose some weight before my period and then have a planned binge day. Period is always the hardest time for me so it's be good if I planned my metabolism stuff around that.

So I still feel like realistically one or multiple things are going to fuck up and I'll end up drinking all the time and binging and gaining weight...but I have to go with this plan and pretend it'll work. Otherwise I won't really try. It also occurred to me that now that I have an iPad I can draw out some stationery so making journal pages will be way easier. I like all the stuff on my phone but I want to use my ring binder journal at some point. I've been kind of saving it though because it takes me so long to make each page. If I can draw them digitally and just print them out that'll be easier to duplicate.

I think today is an okay day so far basically...I'm always tentative about saying that because I feel like bad stuff always happens after good stuff. But I'm glad it's been okay so far. I felt crappy when I got up but I managed to do some walking and eat less than 600kcal, which even then is 200 under my goal. I think the reason I'm so tired today, or one reason at least, is from eating less yesterday than I have been for a while. My metabolism is probably not happy about it. But I already feel a little less bloated.

So the ideal is to be 157 tomorrow. I don't really know whether I can expect that or not. It's also possible I'll have extra weight from muscle soreness - it wasn't an intense workout but it's more than I'm used to right now and I did get soreness last time. Idk. Anyway. I did good. I did good and I wish I could brag about it more and get congratulated, it'd make me more motivated to do it more and I might actually lose the weight. So I'm just going to ramble more here instead I guess

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accidentalnewsiesblog · 6 years ago

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“The King of Brooklyn” and other monikers (Chapter 5)

a short little chapter about learning to read, which you can also do on ao3

~1500 words

The Student

1893

~~~

Spot knew her secret was about to be revealed when Race asked one morning, “What’s the headline today?”

She had their papers in her hand, but she could not read the headline. She could identify most of the letters, but she was at a complete loss on the words they formed.

It wasn’t her fault. Mum couldn’t read, nor had Bridget learned to read. And Spot had become self-conscious about her illiteracy when she started selling papers. She had practiced writing enough to recognize her name — making it easier to sign herself in and out of the lodge when needed — but she’d always faked her way through everything else.

But right now, Race was waiting for her to read the paper. She stared at the page, trying to put together even one word.

“Um…”

She recognized the letter C. The first letter of her last name. That one was easy. The next was an H. Then an I. Another C. Another H? A C with a weird line. An O.

Utter gibberish.

“C…” she began, like the beginning of “Conlon” or the end of “Racetrack." “H…” like the sound at the beginning of “horses." “Um…”

“Spot?”

She looked up from the page. Race was eyeing her with confusion, brows knitted together. He stepped forward and took his bundle. After scanning the letters, he said, “Chicago,” then looked back to her.

Spot felt her face flush. “Right. Yeah. I was getting there.”

His expression didn’t change. He looked around for a moment making sure nobody else was listening then asked, “Spot, can you read?”

“I mean…” Her chest tightened and she broke eye contact. “I mean, I can read.”

She must not have been convincing, because Race didn’t buy it. “Hey, it’s okay if you can’t, I just always thought you could.”

“I can read!” she insisted. “That’s just a hard word!”

Race considered this then shrugged. “Yeah, I guess it’s hard, but… Let’s just talk on the way.”

He led them on the road towards Queens, a few blocks from the wagon before he asked again.

“You can tell me things, you know. I ain’t gonna make fun of you if you don’t know how to read.”

Spot sighed. “Yeah, so I don’t know how to read. Piss off about it, why don’t ya.”

“I just said I ain’t makin’ fun! No need to get all defensive.”

He was right. He was just trying to help but she’d jumped down his throat. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“I can try to teach you if you want.”

She involuntarily glared at him out of the corner of her eye. She didn’t like relying on anyone else for anything. She was self-sufficient. He wasn’t trying to flaunt the fact that he could do something she couldn’t, but her ego was bruised now that her secret was out.

He took her non-response as an invitation to proceed. “Ya gotta start with letters. Like A-B-C—”

He began singing the children’s song to explain the alphabet, but Spot interrupted. “I already know the letters. Skip ahead.”

He contemplated for a moment then pulled one of yesterday’s papers from his bag. “Let’s practice, then. Point out an A.”

She took the pape and began searching. Her first guess was wrong, confusing an H for an A.

“Here’s the difference.” Race pointed at two similar-looking letters. “It’s an A if they come together at the top, but an H if they don’t.”

Spot nodded, committing the fact to memory. She scanned the page further, then pointed tentatively at a letter she thought was an A. “Is that one?”

Race nodded vehemently. “Yeah! Exactly! Now, what about a B?”

She found it quickly, recognizing the letter as a P with two bumps instead of one. They continued on like this through the rest of the alphabet, stumbling over the difference between M and N and W but otherwise successfully identifying most letters. Then Race told her that every letter also had a small version and she almost gave up on reading completely.

"Let's just work with the big letters for now!” he reassured her. They were halfway to Georgie’s and Spot was getting tired of the mental gymnastics, but she nodded anyway. “Start at the top and just tell me which letters they are.”

And so she did. “T… H?” Race nodded. “E. W-O-R-L-D.”

“Perfect! Now try to sound it out.”

“T” — like the end of “Spot” — “H” — like the beginning of “Higgins” — but Race stopped her there.

“Whenever T and H are together, they sound like ‘th’, like in the middle of ‘together.’”

She nodded and tried again. T. H. “Th…” The last letter in the word was E, which was tricky. It could make multiple sounds. It didn’t feel right to use the sound like elephant, so it must be a sound like in the word eagle. “The? The!”

“The!” Race repeated as he grinned. “Keep going!”

W. “W…” An O, which could also make multiple sounds. She contemplated some more, then was struck by a realization.

She was reading the name of the paper. The World.

“The World! W-world,” she slowly sounded out, emphasizing each individual letter.

The rest of the way to Georgie’s she put sounds together in an attempt to form words, realizing that there were lots of letters that made multiple sounds and that they didn’t always make the sound you thought they would. She was particularly peeved that putting an E on the end of the word could change how the other letters sounded, as she found out when reading a headline that included the word “fire.”

Upon arriving at Georgie’s, Race pointed to a sign in the window. “Try that one!”

Spot already knew what it said — Ice Cream and Sodapop — but sounded the words out to practice. I-C-E — the E on the end made the I sound like the beginning of “ice.” C-R-E-A-M — C and R were easy in this word, but the E and A, she wagered, came together to make the “ea” sound. A-N-D. Plain and simple. S-O-D-A-P-O-P would also have been easy except for the fact that both of the O sounds were different — the O in “soda” was different from the O in “pop.” She would get the hang of it, she knew.

Race started hawking papers while Spot went inside to say hello to Georgie. The bell jingled as she entered, but she didn’t see Georgie behind the counter. She looked down a couple of rows to find him poking his head in the back door.

She smiled and waved. “Mornin’ Georgie! It’s Spot and Racetrack!”

He smiled back at her then gestured for her to follow. She cantered down the aisle and into the alley, where Georgie had clearly been taking stock of a recent delivery.

“Need some help?” she offered.

“Yes, my boy, if you don’t mind.” He gestured to the crates sitting about. “I’ve counted everything out, I believe, I just need some help getting these inside.”

“You got it, Georgie.”

He pointed at one of the crates and said, “This one is the heaviest, and my old bones are giving me some trouble. They’re metal straight razors. If you could take them inside behind the counter and stock them, that would be lovely. There’s a shelf labeled ‘razors’ on the back wall.”

Spot nodded. Now was the time to put her new skills to the test. She grabbed the box and started inside.

Surely she could match up the letters on the shelves to the letters on the boxes if all else failed, but first she wanted to try her hand at reading without Race to help her.

She ducked behind the counter and found the labeled shelves.

Razor. Rrrrrazor. R.

Unfortunately, Georgie’s scrawl was less clean than the letters she read typed out in the paper. But eventually Spot located three shelves that started with the letter R.

Figuring out the next letter she needed was easy.

Razor. R-A.

Two shelves were labeled with R-A. The other, Spot noted, was R-I. She was slowly but surely narrowing it down.

She picked out the letters on the first label. R-A… that damned C with a weird line on it. What had Race said that one was?

R-A-G-S. She sounded it out. “R” like “razor” — “A” like “ace” — “G” like “Georgie” — and “S” like “Spot.” She didn’t think that was how the word was actually pronounced, but whatever it was, it wasn’t “razor.”

Onto the next.

R-A-Z-O-R-S. “R” like “razor” — “A” like “ace” — “Z” like… Spot couldn’t think of anything but “zoo” — “O” like how it sounds in her name — “R” like “razor” — “S” like “Spot.” She didn’t pronounce it quite right the first time, but it definitely said “razors.”

She couldn’t help the smile that darted across her face when she read the word. Razors. And she’d read it all by herself. She stocked the razors on the shelf still smirking.

Georgie insisted on paying her whenever she helped him out, and today was no different. She and Race hawked their papers sipping on sweet apple cider. It proved a pretty uneventful day, but Spot was proud of the strides she had made to better herself, Race providing a helping hand.

R-A-C-E, he’d told her. Race.

#newsies #newsies fic #newsies fanfiction #monikers #spot conlon #race higgins #racetrack higgins #genderbend #fem!spot conlon #fem!spot

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