#do not take this seriously

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

What would your headcanons be for the 141 in nursing homes? As in old ass man.

Maybe some extra characters as well? 👀

I'm splitting this up into 3 categories: Physical appearance, personality/behaviour, and overall shenanigans.

John Price

Went bald but still has a killer mustache and a ridiculous amount of body hair and yet all the hair he has left has gone grey. Is SOOO wrinkly. His eyes are hooded/droopy beyond fucking belief.

He's 100% a "Back in my day..." old man. Has def gone half-deaf. Is both a flight risk AND a fall risk but refuses to use his walker/zimmer frame. Is the first one up in the morning, before the staff even changed shifts (consequence of early rising all his life in the military)

Insists on being called 'Captain' by the staff, gives everyone the stink eye if he gets called 'John' or 'Mr.Price'. Sometimes still wakes up dreaming of Makarov and/or Shepherd and spends all day grumpy. Staff hates him.

Simon Riley

Does not go wrinkly. Instead, his skin gets taut and he loses weight and muscle, and becomes skinny/frail. Is VERY hunched over.

Has def lost most of his hearing as well. Is impossible to talk to. A conversation between him and Price spirals from a topic to the next because they misinterpret each other's words. Blasts his fave TV shows (The Price is Right) at top volume all hours of the day.

Has dementia or some other brain degenerative disease, which means he's often lost/confused... So it's not uncommon to see him walking around carrying a cane or umbrella like it's a rifle because he thinks he's still a soldier. Has scared the shit out of night staff by sneaking up behind them with a mask on (where did he get the bloody mask?) and nearly stabbing them with a syringe-like it was one of his knives.

Johnny MacTavish

Does not make it to a nursing home, he's already dead.

Kyle Garrick

Has gone grey but not that wrinkly. Still looks surprisingly good for his age. Is very charming. Wears colourful shirts (Hawaiian and not), and has a nice style... but still wears that stupid bloody hat of his. Has VERY bad hip pain from falling out of helicopters so much.

Is SOOO sweet and polite, and charms all the old ladies AND the nursing staff, every kid that comes visit other grandparents LOVES him. Is the least annoying senior at the nursing home. Also has terrible hearing. Spends his time shouting at Price and Simon to have a conversation.

Still gets taken to veteran/war remembrance days by his family and watches the parades and such... only to look at helicopters with disdain in his eyes and curses them out with a fist.

Alejandro Vargas

Has not gone grey but is a healthy salt-and-pepper. Still keeps his little stubble OR an anchor goatee. Wears glasses now, but they're those types that transition into sunglasses.

His hearing is ALSO shot. Has very shaky hands so he keeps dropping things, especially his pills. Talks crap about everyone with Rodolfo (they gossip in Spanish so no one can hear him.) Is never grumpy. Loves playing cornhole and pétanque.

Is 100% a cougar hunter. Has a silver-tongue and is still so attractive that he just seduces ALL the old ladies. Some of them were still married to their husbands (who were ALSO in the nursing home) and he STILL flirted with them.

Rodolfo Parra

Rudy has gone chubby, wears glasses, and still stays clean-shaven. Wears cardigans and corduroy trousers. Is on a wheelchair.

Is very polite. Spends his time reading in the garden, and likes tending to flowers. Loves a good gossip with Alejandro. Loves playing cards because it's the one game Alejandro cannot play, is very smug about it.

Falls asleep suddenly after meals. Hates Philip Graves with a fucking passion. Hates him so much he still wakes up dreaming about the betrayal in 2022 and gets MAD about it. Wheels himself to Alejandro's room every time and complains. "Pendejo de mierda, Graves."

[dailykaeyas]

I had a sudden vision and I’m unsure how to feel about it

[ps-hope]

"You don't look 32..."

[corgiteatime]

Congratulations, game. You really did subvert my initial expectations with the really-not-all-that-horny vampire and the totally sensible weed Dad figure and Mr. Gale "I'm totally into the fact you haven't taken in a bath in 2 weeks and I read a book about about being turned on by deadly danger and let's have astral projection 4-way sex with only 2 people in outer space and you look good jogging around the city in strappy bondage gear" Dekarios.

Not complaining. I was just surprised, that's all. I love having my expectations subverted.

[thef1nalb0ss]

Yall want some 2016 tumblr shit?

Cody's Raw before Mania entrance except I put "My Boyfriend's Back" over it.

[inamagicalhallucination]

ada akutagawa but one day he's minding his own business and runs across the cutest THE PRETTIEST person he's ever seen and him and pretty guy get talking (pretty guys tells him his name: atsushi) and one trauma dump (this is how they communicate) leads to another trauma dump and suddenly atsushi is offering to let akutagawa meet his boss to see if he can join the agency or get a better job than whatever job leaves him smelling so strongly of blood and akutagawa /should/ tell him he's pm, he should tell him he can't and won't, he should do a lot of things, but all he does is follow atsushi like a lost puppy, a little duckling, and next thing he knows he's being initiated into the ada and yeah

is he still in the pm somehow? idk maybe

did he turn sides ? idk maybe

did he get the cute guy ? not yet, but the cute guy did pat his shoulder once, so its still a win

[dotssu3]

jean is a BULLY

[delicatecookiecashpatrol]

*pride month at the BAU - Penelope has rainbowfied everything- EVERYTHING*

rossi: look not to be homophobic but-

emily: anyone who starts a sentence like ‘not to be blank but’ is instantly going to say something wrong

jj: maybe let’s here him out em

emily: proceed

rossi: as i was saying, i think that this may be a little much. i’m glad you’re all gay and proud and whatever, but i think the government may have an issue with the FBI logo being covered with rainbow glitter

emily: homophobe

jj: em, he kinda has a point

emily: homophobe

morgan: i mean i’m not above glitter and pride but baby girl did go a tiny bit far

*holds up case file printed on rainbow paper*

reid: i like it :)

hotch walking in dressed in a rainbow suit: who’s presenting the case? and emily is right, you homophobes.

garcia: okay so this nasty ass dude has been killing hot women all over texas

emily: misogynist

[localwhoore]

can you write a fic where the logan sergeant defenders are all drivers and noelle gets into a fist fight with logan?

DRIVERS ????

WARNING QND DISCLAIMERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

consented racism and unconsented ageism against noelle obviously under the cut

and also my opinions dont cancel me over this stupid shit tjanks 😁😁

red bull

goatifi

-> 2x wdc, clutched up AD21 and took the checkered flag 10 times (scoring an extra 250 points) and won the championship instead of max or lewis and caused outrage. also scored a redbull seat

max verstappen

-> DUDUDUDU MAX VERSTAPPEN DUDUDUDU MAAX VERSTAPPEN no seriously he won the championship by lap 1 😞

ferrari

fernando alonso

-> future 3x wdc, promising 43 yrold rookie future of f1 who is unfortunately unable to escape the torturous clutches of ferrari (finally wins a wdc for them too)

charles leclerc

-> is chained up and shackled at the bottom of ferrari HQ and fed cold soup and stale bread twice a week and cannot be released unless its race weekend. (inspired by the james vowles c.ai bot i got bored and talked to who had alex albon, who he called alaobono, in a cage for biting williams guests. also he crawled on all fours and threw chairs and printers)

mercedes

liyah amelia grace habibi afzal @foreveralbon

-> when f1 eventually brought sepang back onto the calendar, liyah was fighting for P1 a few laps in when her engineer mentioned sightseeing at KL’s twins towers (the petronas towers). this was a mistake as upon hearing those words, liyah was immediately inhabited by the spirit and earthly energies of her late uncle: muhammad hazam “ارهابي” omar afzal, who passed down his loving lifelong legacy to her via muscle memory and pure instinct aka going back to her roots. anyways, she flung her car towards a corner with banking and projectile launched herself at 346km/h over 60km distance between her and her goal over the span of a shocking 10 minutes and 24 seconds!!! liyah escaped the incident with little injury, but the same cannot be said for those inside the towers (towers as in plural because george russell flew past her into the 2nd tower shortly after). media had an absolute fucking field day

george russell

-> misses half his races to film ads for tommy hilfiger and marriot bonvoy. toto gets pissed and kicks him out of their sleepover party which makes george severely depressed but its ok cz he gets married to carmen in his fav hotel marriot w a british royalty themed wedding (hes dressed as princess diana)

mclaren

lando norris

-> 4x wdc, paid goatifi to take out max and asked oscar to pull a kmag in saudi and decimated a 1-2 at silver stone hip hip hooray also he got fucked into the monaco hairpin barriers and was injured permanently unable to grow a pedostache

oscar piastri

-> 999x wdc, boy oh boy where do i even begin. the loml, oscar piastri. you truly are my sunshine. my only sunshine. you make me happy when skies are gray. you’ll never know dearrrrr how much i looove youuu please dont takee my sunshine awaaaaayyyyyyyy pookie wookie aookie bookie cookie dookie eookue fookie gookie hookie iookie jookie kookie lookie mookie nookie oookie pookie quookie rookie sookie tookie uookie vookue wookue xookie yookie zookie

alphatauri

yuki tsunoda

-> 50x wdc. my goat 🐐 he beat daniel 23-1 and is a fucking LEGENDDDDDD MY GOAT TRRRRRAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH YOINTS AND YUKAMPIONSHIP LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOO 🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶

liam lawson

-> he finally let his hair grow out so he doesnt look like a lesbian anymore cutie patootie finally got a seat 😜😜

aston martin

avis cloostefek @aviscarrentals

-> actively trying to seduce lawrence stroll for that bank cz shes kinda broke idk the f1 life pays her less rhan she thought???? regularly breaks into the VIP area and eats all rhe food in catering because shes pasty pale white and has no cuisine culture except crackers and unseasoned boiled chicken and a side of cheese soggy french fries

lance stroll

-> justice for lance guys his dad is being seduced by a pasty white woman with very bad very severe chronic culture-less behavioural tendencies 😞

alpine..

lea @vroomvroomcircuit

-> im sorry but someone had to be in the alpine and i picked u🥰 much love!! anyways one fine typical tuesday lea remembered that her teammate is french and her deeprooted german moustache man awakened and unleashed havoc upon the french demanding her right to the land of the baguettes and croissant to be reclaimed for the return of glory for the motherlandYAA deutschland 🇩🇪 NEIN DA FÜHRER SAUSAGE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

pierre gasly

-> french ☹️

haas

althea noelle. @disneyprincemuke

-> 10x destructors championship. an antique and prehistoric primordial being in the form of a petite pinoy creature. it has devoted to the art of racing since the dawn of time. since day was night, night was day as the two parallels of each other blurred in a flourish and spectacle of a draped veil over the vast expanse known as the horizon, since the stars aligned side by side in the darkest of hours. she raced upon the lands of pangea, upon the tallest of mountains now reduced to stones and rubble that crumble under footsteps and blow with the breeze. throughout millennia, throughout the countless frigid winters and blistering summers as she watched empires rise and fell, civilisation bloom and prosper, tyrants dictate and rebels overthrow, dynasties rule and eras whirl past like the wind, akin to momentary blips as centuries compile into memories viewed back upon within seconds. the only divinity to harbour ancient knowledge lost to time and space, lost through endless bloodshed of war as humanity tore itself apart , screaming aggressive rage and agony from the inside as flesh ripped flesh as the steady drill of what could be known as time mercilessly marched on, and waited for none. the little beam of consciousness this dingus fostered within burnt bright bold as passion strove on as fuel for her little stature (shocking). also she has yet to score a point in f1 cz she keeps twinning logan sargeant and crashing out on the 1st lap. her nickname is turn one thea 💀💀💀

TLDR; noelle is old and hasnt scored in f1

kevin magnussen

-> https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSFGTu8tL/

stake kick balls sauber

zhou goatyu

-> 中国是第一！！周冠宇我爱你啊！！！请让祖国骄傲我们都支持你。周冠宇周冠宇！加油加油加油拿多分🗣️🗣️🗣️🥶🥶🥶

mclgf (now ur saubergf idk) @mclarengf

-> all hands on deck for the pitstops!!!! toby and newplayer are incharge of the tires and aria is ur race engineer turned reserve driver and tobys a development driver idfk bro 😭😭

williams

alex albon

-> james vowles character ai bot

logan sargeant

-> Oh Say, can you see By the dawn's early light What so proudly we hailed At the twilight's last gleaming? Whose broad stripes and bright stars Through the perilous fight O'er the ramparts we watched Were so gallantly, yeah, streaming? And the rockets' red glare The bombs bursting in air Gave proof through the night That our flag was still there O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave also twinning noelle loves crashing

safety car driver

me (i cant drive)

[adhdchilles]

"patroclus is this extremely buff warrior" this, "patroclus is a soft malewife" that, how about this:

he is both at the same time

[extremesocialoutcast]

My own take on the meme

[hammerbonk]

The Narrator is Vertin’s dad send post

[swiftlark]

why’d you have to make me want you? why’d you have to give me nothing back?

eliza’s top 100 ships 45/100: dennis reynolds + ronald “mac” macdonald

[shadowsreblogs]

i keep seeing that one picture going around so i. redrew it with these two