#but it just made me laugh as i was listening to the audiobook

[dracharenae]

sb: game of thrones is lord of the rings but with sex.

me: game of thrones is dune but with snow.

[showmethesneer]

Jane, writing the conversation Anne and Captain Harville have about love:

Jane, writing THE WENTWORTH LETTER:

[lesbianpepsi]

sweet as cherries | part II

pairing: jenna ortega x blind!fem!reader

summary: you finally go on the date Jenna promised you

series masterlist

link to request

words: 4.203k

warnings: light swearing, r makes more blind jokes?, bad writing

authors note: thank you all so much for 800 followers, that's actually mental. love y'all <33

Jenna hadn't left your thoughts for longer than a minute since you met her a few days back at the cafe.

It was bad.

You couldn't stop yourself from thinking about her every single moment. 

Drinking cinnamon latte? Jenna. Your phone is ringing? You hoped it was Jenna calling. Heading towards the cafe? You hoped Jenna was there.

It was just Jenna, Jenna, Jenna. 

When she did call, hearing her voice again through technology wasn't anything like it was when you were a teenager watching one of her movies.

It was a thousand times better.

Hearing her voice actually speak to you, laugh at your terrible jokes and even compliment you made you feel as if you were in heaven. 

Her laugh was certainly one of your favourite things. 

As the days passed it reached Thursday, an exact week since you met Jenna at the cafe.

You were interrupted in the middle of listening to an audiobook by a phone call from Jenna. You giddily answered the phone with a smile already plastered on your face. 

"Hey Jenna." 

"Hey Y/n, how've you been today?" She asked you, hearing her saying your name never failed to make butterflies appear in your stomach. 

You shrugged your shoulders as you relaxed even further into the couch. "I've been alright thanks for asking, I've been stuck in the house all day 'cause of the rain. You?"

"It's raining heavily today, hasn't it?" You hummed in agreement. "I've been alright thanks for asking, tired but alright. Hopefully I'm gonna make yours better."

You chuckled as you raised your eyebrows as if she was with you. "Oh?"

Jenna giggled nervously through the phone, her angelic laugh making your smile soften. 

"I'm not working tomorrow so I was wondering if you'd like to go on that date I promised you?" She inquired with a tone to her voice that you never had heard before.

Without thinking you began nodding your head eagerly, soon after coughing awkwardly as you internally thanked the fact Jenna did not see your reaction.

"I'd love to go on a date with you." You answered her speedily making Jenna laugh at your jumbled words. "Yeah?" She asked again, you could practically hear her smirk through the phone.

"Yeah, I've been waiting all week for you to ask me out." You immediately regret your words as Jenna hums through the phone. "All week?" She teases, now you know she has a shit eating smirk on her face.

"You know what, I think I'll be busy tomorrow." This only made Jenna let out a laugh. "What a shame, guess I'll just have to go on a date with someone else."

"Oh look at that, my schedule just freed, turns out I am free tomorrow. No need to get a replacement for me." You admitted swiftly, laughing lightly yourself.

"Good, I don't think I could've found someone as good as you to go on a date with me." She answered with a cheeky smile on her face. 

Your heart skipped a beat at her words. She definitely knew how to charm someone, that you're sure about. 

"Well isn't that lucky for the both of us then." You concluded with a smile toying on your lips. "What're we gonna do?" 

"I've already planned everything out." Jenna says as she shuffled around in her seat.

"Really? What're we gonna be doing then?" You asked her curiously switching your phone to your other hand.

Jenna chuckled. "You'll have to wait till tomorrow to see." 

You groaned loudly, throwing your head backwards as you leaned against the head against the couch. 

"Really? You're gonna make me wait?"

"Yep!" Jenna exclaimed.

"I hate you." You grumbled through the phone, rolling your eyes as you did so. Jenna laughed, "You sure about that?" 

"No." You grumbled with a soft smile. "You're annoying, Jen." 

"What a way to woo a girl." Jenna replied, a small blush on her cheeks at the nickname. "I'll pick you up tomorrow around six?" 

"Well I certainly won't be drinking to pick you up." You said, sarcasm dripping off of your voice.

"Ha-ha. I bet you're trying not to laugh right now." A small giggle erupted from your chest at her nods, smiling a crooked smile.

"Maybe."

Jenna laughed freely as she shook her head, smiling like a fool. "So six?"

"I'll be waiting." 

—————

To say you're nervous is an understatement. You're fucking petrified. 

It hadn't hit you till after you and Jenna ended the call -which lasted another hour- that you're going on a date with America's It Girl. 

At Jenna's decision to not tell you where you'll be going it took you an entire hour to get changed.

After many, many outfit changes you decided on white long sleeve dress shirt, basic black pants along with a pair of even more basic black boots. 

Classy but something most people would wear on a daily basis. 

"Hey Alexa, what time is it?" You yelled out as you held your cane with a strong grip, your knee bouncing nervously up and down. 

"It's currently 5:59, one minute till your date with Jenna Ortega, a famous actress who was born on September twenty seventh-"

"Okay, okay, thank you Alexa."  You interrupted, not wanting to hear the machine ramble on about your date.

The clicking of the clock filled the silent apartment making you feel more nervous as the time ticked down. 

Would you make a fool of yourself? Will Jenna find out that she's actually not interested in you? What if it's awkward? What if-

"It's six in the evening, you are scheduled to go on a date with Jenna Ortega." Alexa spoke again, interrupting your internal self doubting. 

The exact moment the bot stopped talking gentle knocks were heard from your front door. You swallowed nervously as you stood up, leaning on your cane momentarily before you headed over to the door.

Taking a deep breath you twist the door-handle and pull it open, a nervous smile on your face.

"Y/n," Jenna says breathlessly with her own nervous smile on her face. "You look beautiful. Gorgeous even."

You blushed heavily at her words, looking down as if that would hide your blush. 

"Thank you, I don't doubt that you look even more beautiful." You reply with a grin, lifting your head to look in her direction.

Jenna laughed playfully as she gazed at you, her eyes flickering over your body as she admired how good you looked.

"Thank you. Are you ready to go?" 

You nod your head happily, stretching your hand out to where you know the coat rack was at, you feel around the different fabrics before you feel the texture for your black trench coat. 

Grabbing it, you quickly put it on as you take a step outside, closing the door behind you. 

"You gonna tell me where we're heading to?" You ask her as you instinctively go to grab Jenna's elbow with your free hand, letting her lead you towards your car, her being a step ahead of you.

Jenna didn't protest at the contact and even smiled at it. "You're just gonna have to wait." She replies with a grin as she directs you towards her car.

"Seriously?" You complain as you arrive at Jenna's car. Jenna opens the car door for you, making sure you don't bump your head on top of the car as you enter. Passing her your cane she closed the door as she carefully put it in the backseat, joining you in the front behind the wheel soon after.

"As serious as pie." Jenna says as she begins to drive, the car engine revving lowly as she drives off. 

You turn to look at her with furrowed eyebrows, laughing confusedly. "As serious as pie? I have never heard that before. What's so serious about pies?" 

Jenna smiled as she focused her eyes on the road, resisting the urge to let out a small laugh. "Pies sound like spies."

"Then why don't you say you are as serious as spies?" You ask even more confused, laughing amused as you push your thick black sunglasses back up your nose.

"When I was younger I constantly got the two mixed up so If I wanted an actual pie I'd ask: 'Can I have a spy?' I don't know how I mixed them up, but somehow I did." Jenna answered you with her own laugh, smiling from ear to ear as she heard you laugh even harder.

"It gets worse too. I remember I wanted to watch a Spy movie so my confused self asked 'Can I watch pie?'. So at the young age of four years old someone - I still don't remember who- did what I asked for and put on American Pie for me." 

You couldn't help but laugh as you shook your head, amused by Jenna's story. "Oh poor sweet innocent baby Jenna." You said in between laughs.

"I think it was so traumatising that I've completely blanked it out, I only know the story since my Mom likes to bring it up during family holidays." Jenna laughs as she flicks the indicators on, the low ticking noise being heard between your and Jenna's laughs. "The time she walked into the living room to her four year old daughter watching American Pie."

"I can't even imagine your moms face walking into that." You exclaim as your laughter finally dies down, your crooked grin never leaving your face.

After Jenna's story the car is filled with low music from the radio. Eventually you feel Jenna stop and park the car, leaving the car before arriving outside your door moments later, opening it up for you as she hands you your cane.

"Thanks," You whispered as you gripped at the cane with your dominant hand, your other hand reaching out for Jenna's elbow. 

At first you waved it across the air but Jenna quickly came back to your side and guided your non-dominant hand to her elbow.

"I feel like it isn't fair that I literally can't see where we are, so you finally gonna tell me?" You asked as you walked with Jenna, letting her guide you as your cane glided against the floor. 

"It isn't much but I booked us reservations at a restaurant, I made sure to pick the best one in town." You smiled as you unconsciously licked your lips at the mention of food.

"The best one, huh? Is it also the fanciest?" You teased with an appreciative smile, showing Jenna that you were truly thankful about her planning the date.

Jenna blushed as she chuckled, glancing over at your side profile briefly before back at the restaurant in front of you two.

As you neared the entrance a man in a tight suit opened the glass door for the two of you, his smile as wide as it was fake as he rehearsed his line for the probably hundredth time.

"Welcome to The Crown, I hope you enjoy your meals." Jenna smiled politely at him as she entered the restaurant with you by her side.

Immediately low chatter and sounds of cutlery was heard throughout the entire restaurant, filling up your sensitive ears with the sounds.

Jenna guided you towards the check in where another man stood in with a fake smile plastered on his face, a formal suit on his figure. She smiled up at  him as she came to a halt, you stopping beside her, never letting go of her elbow. 

"Hi, reservations under the name Ortega." She said with a ravishing smile. 

The smell of the food was intoxicating as it flooded your nose, you definitely are going to enjoy your dinner tonight, that's for sure.

"I'm sorry but I see no reservations under the name Ortega." The man apologised in an overly fake apologetic tone that you couldn't help but notice.

Jenna's eyes widened dramatically as she shook her head, taking a step close to where the man stood behind the small podium with an iPad attached to it.

"Are you sure? I made reservations three days ago." Jenna insisted with a polite voice as she laughed nervously. "What about Jenna?" She tried again.

The man hissed as he shook his head at Jenna. "I'm sorry but there are no reservations under the name Ortega or Jenna. We've recently hired new staff and it gets hectic over the summer so one of them have probably mixed up the reservations. Sorry." He answers, dragging out the letter 'y' much longer than necessary.

Jenna sighed as she turned to face you, a frown on her face. "I'm so sorry, Y/n." You turned your head to the direction of her voice, a crooked smile still on your lips. "There's nothing to be sorry about, it isn't your fault the reservations got messed up." 

She sighed as she looked down at the ground, embarrassed that she had ruined your and hers first date. "Still, this night was supposed to be perfect but now we have nowhere to eat." The brunette apologised again in a thick voice.

You shake your head at her as you squeezed at her elbow reassuringly. "We can still have a great night, Jen, c'mon let's go for a walk and we can figure it out then." 

Jenna reluctantly nodded her head after a few seconds, raising her hand to lay it over yours for a second before she slowly turned around, making sure you were turning with her slowly. 

"Let's go," She affirmed, walking out of the restaurant with a small frown still on her face.

Jenna and you stayed silent for a few minutes as you walked down the lively street. The actress felt a gnawing sense of guilt in her stomach every time she glanced at you.

You on the other hand still had a smile toying on your lips, more than happy to just be around Jenna. You sense Jenna was feeling guilty about the 'supposed' ruined date, but to you the date wasn't ruined at all, a minor hiccup.

"Can I ask you a question?" You abruptly ask her as you turn your head to look at her face.

"You just asked me one." She retorted, glancing back at you with a grin. You rolled your eyes under your black glasses. "Of course you're that type of person. Bet if you were a teacher and I asked if I can go to the bathroom you'd say: 'I don't know, can you?'" 

Jenna laughed as she shook her head, the corners of her eyes crinkling up in delight as she did so. "Wow, you really do think that low of me." She teased back with her own playfulness. 

"Of course I do, I loathe you so much I'm going on a date with you." You disclosed with noticeable sarcasm in your voice as you chuckled. "Seriously though, can I ask you a question?"

"I don't know, can you?" Jenna replied without any hesitation.

"You're hilarious, can't you see I'm laughing my ass off right now?" You replied dryly, acting annoyed, but the twitch of the corner of your lips telling a completely different story. 

"What did you wanna ask me?" Jenna finally asked you, putting you out of your misery as you two walked down the lit up street.

"Is it weird seeing your face plastered absolutely everywhere?" You questioned her with genuine curiosity. "Not like I've ever even seen your face before, but is it weird or have you gotten used to it?"

Jenna stifled a little laugh at your joke as she shrugged her shoulders weakly. "It was a massive shock in the beginning, if I'm being honest. Out of all my projects I never expected Wednesday to be my biggest break. It took some time for me to start getting used to it, it can still be very stressful at times but I've gotten much better at managing it compared to how I was in November."

Your thumb caressed against Jenna's shirt as you two walked, a small encouraging smile on your face as you listened to Jenna talk.

Unknown to you Jenna smiled softly at the feeling of your caressing her lightly.

"I know for a fact I'll never get used to the paparazzis, they're the fucking worst with their blinding flashing cameras." She complains. No star will ever get used to the invasion of privacy at every given moment of their life.

You snorted a laugh. "Guess if they ever see us together in public I'll be okay then."

Jenna stayed silent for a moment, confused by your words until she finally got your joke. The latina bit her lower lip to hide the laugh wanting to escape from her, a smirk on her lips. 

Before Jenna could say anything she felt you grip her tighter as you stopped walking, she immediately turned to you full of worry but by the wide smile on your face she quickly calmed herself down.

"I know what we're gonna have for dinner." You exclaimed with a delighted smile. "If there's one thing I can smell better than cinnamon latte it's wood-fired pizza trucks." 

Her eyes glanced around at your words and to her surprise a wood-fired pizza truck was at the corner of the street, only a small line of people queuing.

"You're a genius, Y/n. Let's go." Jenna eagerly said, walking towards it at a pace quicker than usual. You followed along with her just as eagerly, both of you having wide smiles on your faces.

As the two of you arrived at the food truck there were only three other people in front of you, an incredibly small line for a Friday night. 

Standing beside Jenna you turned your head in her direction, your smile nervous as you nodded towards the truck.

"Can you read the menu to me, please?" You gingery asked her with a taut voice, Jenna nodded her head without hesitation, turning to read the menu as she listed off the different types of pizzas and what's on them.

After Jenna read the entire menu to you, you decided on a barbecue chicken pizza and Jenna going for a pizza called clucking spicy.

Jenna stepped forward, you followed her as you reached the front of the truck, the strong smells of different flavours and fire sneaking into your nose.

"What can I get for you two lovely ladies?" The owner said in a cheery voice as he leaned against the counter, gawking down at the two of you.

Jenna looked up at him with her own polite smile. "Hi can I get one twelve inch clucking spicy pizza, one twelve inch barbecue chicken pizza and can I have one can of cherryade as well please."

"Of course, the drink is on the house, darling." He replied still with a cheery voice as he wrote down the orders on a notepad. 

You grinned at the sound of a free drink while Jenna shook her head, smiling nervously. "Are you sure? I can pay if you want." She insisted.

The man shook his head. "And I insist it's for free, my youngest daughter loves you in that show -oh what's the name. Oh! Stuck in the Middle, she watches it every morning before school."

Your heart practically melted at the man's words, your smile turning soft as you listened intently to their small conversation.

Jenna blushed lightly from embarrassment as she smiled up at the man.

"Oh, thank you so much, sir. How much is it for the pizzas?" She asked as she pulled out a wallet from her pocket.

You shook your head as you squeezed her elbow again, stealing her attention away from her own wallet. "I'll pay for it." You tell her with a smile.

Jenna shakes her own head as she gazes at your face. "No, it's fine, I'll pay."

"Jen, seriously I can pay, you already managed to make it cheaper so you've done your part." You laughed, loosening your hold on her as you shoved your hand into the pocket of your trench coat, searching for your wallet.

"Paying is the least I can do." Jenna argued back as she turned to look at the man who had an amused look on his face, his eyes flickering between you two.

"How much?" She asked again.

"Sixteen." He said with a small chuckle. 

You swiftly pulled out your wallet pulling out a twenty as you placed it on the counter before Jenna or the man could say anything. 

"Y/n!" Jenna complained as she turned to glare at you. You smiled in the man's direction as you ignored the feeling of Jenna's eyes staring into your side profile. 

He bellowed out a laugh as he shook his head, taking the twenty as he fiddled around with the cashier. "Young love." He muttered to himself with a smile.

The man gave you the change along with a small slip of paper with your order number on it. "The food will be ready soon." He says before turning around to help with the orders.

You passed Jenna the slip of paper as the two of you made your way to a bench. Once you two are sitting down you hear her snort a laugh next to you.

"What?" You asked with a nervous smile, your fingers tapping against your cane. Jenna had a smirk on her face as she fiddled with the paper. "We're order number sixty nine." She explained in a dirty voice as she resisted the urge to laugh. 

You couldn't help but laugh lightly. "Seriously? What are you, a teenage boy?" You teased her, shuffling closer to her subtly.

"Hey! You're laughing too so you find it just as funny as I do." She jabbed back with a playful expression as she gazed at you, a look of pure admiration on her face.

Conversations flowed easily between you and Jenna for the rest of the night, almost as if it was the easiest thing ever. As easy as walking, listening even breathing.

The two of you ate your beyond amazing pizzas after giggling like children after hearing the man's voice booming voice yell, "Sixty nine!" across the street. 

Jenna drank all of the cherryade to herself but you honestly didn't mind, you stole a few sips and that was more than enough for you. The drink itself was sweet and okay at best.

Hours passed as you and Jenna sat on the bench, chatting and laughing away like there was no tomorrow. Eventually the two of you had to part ways as it somehow reached midnight before you even knew it.

Jenna, the gentlewoman she is, took you home and even walked you to your door.

You could hear your own heartbeat in your ears as you lingered in the doorway to your house, your body facing Jenna's.

 "I had a really good time, Jenna, thank you." You say, Jenna smiles at you as she takes a small step closer to you. "It definitely wasn't how I expected the night heading but I really enjoyed myself too."

Swallowing your anxiety you smiled at her taking your own limpid step closer to her.  "Does that mean there will be another date?" You ask her in a hopeful voice, your anxiety crawling back up your throat with each word you uttered.

Jenna laughed her heavenly laugh as she bit her bottom lip. "I'd love nothing more than a second date." 

"Love huh? I must've really made a good impression on you then." You teased her in a weak attempt to try to calm down the erratic beating of your heart. Convinced if Jenna and you stayed silent she would've been able to hear it pounding against your chest.

"Wanna know what I would love even more?" Jenna asks in a soft voice, taking her another step closer to you. You shake your head 'no' at her question, a sensation of butterflies gnawing at your stomach.

Jenna moved even closer placing a gentle hand on your waist, a blush burned at the tip of your ears at the feeling. She slowly leaned closer to you until her mouth hovered over your ear, you could feel her breath against your ear. Goosebumps swiftly erupted all over your body at the feeling.

"For a goodnight kiss." She whispered with a smirk, enjoying the way your cheeks burned as furiously as your ears at her words.

Carefully you raised your hand as you placed your palm on her cheek, sighing contently at the feeling of her soft smooth skin. 

Jenna pulled away from your ear as she gazed at your lips; you could feel her low quick breaths against your own lips.

"And I'd love nothing more than to make you happy." You declared in a small voice before pulling Jenna in for a kiss.

The sensation of Jenna's lips on yours immediately caused a larger swarm of butterflies in your stomach as well as making your knees feel much weaker. Your other hand quickly grabbed at her waist, sighing quietly as you kissed Jenna.

She tasted like cherries; a sweet taste you could feel yourself becoming addicted to. 

Jenna's own arm was wrapped around your neck as she pulled you even closer to her.

If you thought your favourite thing about Jenna was her honey like voice, then it definitely had some competition as you could only describe kissing Jenna as one word.

Heavenly.

—————

taglist: @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @canvascoloredin

if you want to be added to the taglist just comment and i'll add you:)

[specialagentlokitty]

Carol Danvers x teen!reader - just a teenager

Hiiii, could I request prompt 15: “why are you staring at me” with Carol Danvers and a teen!reader please? - Anon💜

15: “why are you staring at me?”

Sitting in the avengers compound, you swung your legs back and forth as you nibbled at the sandwich Nat had brought in your for.

“Hey Nat?” You asked.

“Yeah?”

You looked up at her, and you gestured for her to come over so she did.

“What’s wrong?”

“There’s somebody coming into the compound…” you whispered.

“Are they a threat?”

You stayed silent for a moment, and then you shook your head.

“No, they have immense power but no sense of threat. Just incredibly powerful.”

Nat ruffled your hair.

“Thanks kid.”

You hummed, picking up your plate you wondered down the hallway, and you walked into the room where Bruce was standing with Steve.

“Hello.”

“Hey kiddo, what’s up?” Steve asked.

“I’m not talking to you, there’s somebody behind me.”

They looked behind you and you felt Steve grab your arm, moving you behind him.

Standing with your back against the super soldiers, you carried on eating your food while resting against him.

“She’s not a threat.” You said.

“No offence kid, but you cant know that.” Rocket said.

You shrugged a little bit, and you made your way around Steve, wondering back into the room you were eating in.

Sitting on the table, you listened as they all came in and you glanced towards them before turning away.

“Who’s this?”

“Sorry, this is (Y/N), Fury was looking after them, (Y/N) this is Carol Danvers.” Bruce said.

“I know, Fury spoke of her sometimes.”

“So, they said that you can sense power, is that true?” Carol asked.

“Yeah, I can tell if somehow has a power, what it is and how dangerous it is.”

You set your plate down and you heard somebody getting up, they walked behind you, plating their hands on your shoulders.

Smiling a little bit you looked upwards.

“Thor.”

“What do you think of this woman (Y/N)?” He asked.

You hummed a little bit.

“She’s helpful.”

“Right get outta here kid, let us talk, go see if Tony wants anything.” Nat said.

You let Thor pull you up, and you left the room making your way to Tony.

When he left the compound you went with him, but when things started going south with everything and they were all dragged back together you couldn’t go with them.

You didn’t have the strength they needed, and nobody wanted to put you in harms way.

So, instead you travelled and explored, waiting for the phone call that would bring you back home.

When the call came, you were excited to be reunited with the man who was looking after you, and you knew he wasn’t alone.

“I need you to stay with Danvers for a while.” Fury said.

“Why?”

“Because there’s still a lot here we need to sort out and until it’s safe I want you out of harms way.”

“Okay, good enough for me.”

Carol didn’t really know what to do with you, she didn’t know how to interact with you or what to say.

Sure, she knew how to interact with teenagers but you didn’t seem like normal teenagers, you spent a lot of time listening to audiobooks, you played card games by yourself.

Sitting in her chair, she looked at you as you stared straight ahead and you smiled a little.

“Why are you staring at me?”

“Anybody would be thrilled to be out here, you don’t seem to care, how come?”

“Ah, I see Fury never told you everything.”

“Everything?”

You turned in your chair to look at her and you smiled a little.

“I was a hydra experiment, the side affects is loss of sight. I can’t see, but I have an incredible sense of perception and sense for superhuman powers.”

“I’m sorry…”

“It’s fine, not your problem not mine either. It’s why Fury looked after me.”

Carol nodded her head and she reached out with her hand only for you to slap it away.

“I can see the aurora of your power Carol, I know when you’re nearby.”

You stood up and stretched.

“So, can you sense this?”

You ducked as she slowly swung her arm towards you.

You laughed a little and turned around to face her.

“Do your worst.”

Carol laughed and did it again, watching as you easily evaded her pathetic attempts at an attack.

She could see that you enjoyed people not tiptoeing around you trying to be careful for no reason.

You had a natural talent for fighting, and clearly had made use if the powers you were forced to have, but deep down you were just a teenager.

You wanted to fight and cause trouble and she could see that in the pranks you kept pulling and mischievous look you had.

That’s why Fury asked her to take you in.

You needed somebody who could keep up with you and let you live a semi normal life, you needed a family and she needed that too

[by-the-dark-of-the-moon]

Today I drove 2 hours and listened to the Sandman audiobook and I reached the part where Edwin and Charles appear (I had already watched Dead Boy Detectives so I saw the show before meeting the characters in Sandman). It was sort of weird at first because they're SO MUCH YOUNGER in Sandman (I knew they were, but the audiobook makes it very striking as the actors' voices sound really young).

I really liked their story, the atmosphere of the haunted boarding school was amazing and it was sweet and heartbreaking. For some reason, it made me think about the movie The Orphanage which I really like. It's probably because of the combination of horror and hope and melancholy/nostalgia that permeates the two stories.

I did laugh at some point because very dark and heartbreaking moments are juxtaposed with Neil's very ... I don't know, sort of bright/musical narration (?) like the moment where Edwin talks about his death and the discussion goes pretty much like that:

"- They(the teenagers who killed him) would come here and kill frogs and rabbits and cats ...

- ...And you

- And me.

It wAs a THURSday 😊😁"

I love his narration, so much, btw, it's not a criticism, it's one of the best things in this audiobook (and they are a lot of good things in this audiobook). It just sort of sounded discordant here but.... you could also say that it fits the ambivalent tone of the story which oscillates between darkness and hope.

I don't know why I'm even writing this but, listen to the audiobook, it's amazing 🥰

[kevindaysupremacy]

ppl who have listened to the aftg audiobooks (extensively lol) HAVE U NOTICED in TFC when the audiobook narrator has Kevin saying "I have to call JEEN" after the district change news but then somehow pronounced Jean correctly for every other audiobook it just makes me laugh every time that that made the cut

[eerna]

You're reading fourth wing?? Please share your thoughts. I heard it sucks absolute ass

I'm only 10 chapters in but here are my first impressions

Rebecca Soler of the TLC audiobooks, which I have listened to a small million of times, is doing the narration. Meaning I am imagining Cinder most of the time. Whoopsie.

The MC's hair. That's all I am gonna say.

The lack of description, the vocabulary, and the MC's sarcastic personality and way of speaking made me think we're in some kind of a modern dragon land. Imagine my surprise when 8 chapters in i find out they don't even have PENS because we ARE IN TRADITIONAL OLD TIMEY FANTASY.

There was a scene where the MC is in a very dangerous situation so she decides to take her mind off of it by... reciting basic information about the country she lives in. It's some of the clunkiest worldbuilding I've ever witnessed and I was too busy laughing to pay attention so now I don't know anything about the geography or political landscape. Like imagine if listing the countries your homeland borders on took up so much of your mental capacity that you forgot you were about to die.

My largest impression: this is just Divergent but they are allowed to say "fuck". It's literally Divergent. Not based on worldbuilding, but the tone and the tropes and the writing style and the characters. This book belongs in 2012 by all accounts except its publication date.

All in all: this is a Rat Circle of Hell book club pick so I did not expect to like it, but. Hot damn. I think you're right and it shall suck absolute ass

[foolishlovers]

🐜

(Need a good laugh💖🤭)

Lots of love for you!

*rubs hands together* anything for you 💜 🐜 Recommend a fic that makes you laugh! A crack fic, or something that's just really funny!

i read Lit by fellshish (T, 12k) today and i'm still processing it tbh. it was so very hilarious and i felt so weirdly seen in the whole literature class setting. crowley's characterisation is so on point and so very heartwarming. every sentence, every chapter honestly just made me smile more and more, i don't think there's any other author who makes me laugh more actually! here's the summary

Crowley takes a university course on literature and surprise! The book they’re discussing is Good Omens. Uh oh.

here are some more funny fics:

Date by ddagent (T, 2k) Every year, Aziraphale is spoiled on his birthday. This year, he decides to do the same for Crowley. There's only one problem - he's not actually sure when Crowley's birthday is.

The Angel Line by FancyTrinkets (E, 2k) The one in which Aziraphale purchases and listens to a pornographic audiobook that just so happens to be narrated by Crowley. Aziraphale cringed and covered his face. This was going to be awful, and also thrilling, and he wasn't sure what he ought to be feeling about it, but there was a definite sense of vicarious shame.

The Invention of Salacious Selfies by Blue_Sparkle (M, 5k) Crowley invented the selfie. And right before doing that he invented the Dick Pic. Secure in his knowledge that Aziraphale does not in fact own a mobile phone capable of displaying such images Crowley ends up sending dozens of saucy images. It's not like the angel can receive and look at them after all, or access the backlog should he ever get a phone. Right?

Fire In Your Heart (And Your Kitchen) by WaitingToBeBroken (T, 7k) The most beautiful man that Crowley has ever seen is also the firefighter that keeps having to put out the fires in his kitchen. It just so happens that Crowley is awful at cooking.

got a pretty face, pretty boyfriend too by KissMyAsthma, leukozyna (T, 9k) Aziraphale and Crowley are next-door neighbours. They’ve been attracted to each other since they met. The only thing keeping them apart is a thin wall between their bedrooms and Atticus and Freddie, Aziraphale’s and Crowley’s respective life partners… or are they? A human AU glued together by misunderstandings and wet food.

send me an emoji for a good omens fic rec

[blysse-and-blunder]

In lieu of a long weekend

sunday, may 19, 2024 ~ 11:30pm

technically tomorrow is a day off but the nice thing about grad school is that means essentially nothing for me, and tonight still feels like a sunday night—but it was a beautiful, mostly work-free weekend up until now

reading i forget now whether i mentioned this in my last ilcb, but last month i listened to the audiobook of jenn lyons’ the ruin of kings, which means that now it’s time for the sequel! started these huge fantasy epics on the recommendation of @booksmithereens, who has yet to steer me wrong—but i will say that upon first getting started, I didn’t especially follow (or care) all that much about most of the world building, especially since trok starts in with a lot of slavery and physical / sexual violence. upon second read-through, because i did go back with the ebook as soon as i finished listening to trok the first time, i think i was able to take more pleasure from the characters’ dialogue—there are very funny moments—and from the originality of certain features of the series’ take on deities and magic. i’m 28% through the audio book of the second novel, the name of all things, and i adore that we’ve got a new snarky editor leaving footnotes and editorializing comments, and that we have a new female pov character who really adds to the (intentionally) one-dimensional view of her we were given in the first one. these are good companion books for when i’m toiling in the hollow knight mines (have i explained how i have hacked boss fights for myself by turning off the game sound and instead relaxing, listening to an audiobook, and just getting to focus on the visuals—the flow state this induces can last for. hours. and has yet to get old), and they are another worthy entry in the dragons/magic/demons/swords/prophecy type fantasy canon.

watching finally finished (screaming, cringing, laughing, etc) season one of the white lotus with g and @hematiterings. all things considered, an easier ending than i feared, weirdly? i lost count of full-body cringe reactions (from sheer gut-churning dialogue, not the way kids use ‘cringe’ these days) at like 10, and then we started season two (which we’ve all seen the first few episodes of) and the counter had to start over at the beginning. still fun though. still fun.

also watched the first three-four episodes of dungeon meshi! which i thought were excellent, but i now have just enough context to be really actually affected by casual spoilers, so i may have to blacklist it here on the blue hellsite for now, and watched episode 4 of house of the dragon this evening whilst folding my laundry. i am holding out for when this show introduces the new lead actresses because I have seen their interview in gifs going around and i would like to see it. so far though, i’m distressed by the politics and bored by the action, as is to be expected from a game of thrones show.

listening hmmm chappelle roan Hot to Go has been stuck in my head for a while now so let’s go with that. initially I thought the lyrics to most of her new album really didn’t live up to pink ping club (see my 2021?2? Ilcb where i went on at *length* about how good that song is) but you know what, we’re capable of admitting when we’re wrong and this is one of those times. H! O! T! T! O! G-O!

playing i got the sharp shadow charm in hollow knight today! Nosk and the enraged guardian have been kicking my ass by turns. i had so much geo I had been carefully carrying around and reclaiming every time i died because millibelle had her career pivot and closed my account 😝 and i finally lost it today. Alas. but since there was nothing i could buy at any of the three vendors i visited, it was all going to end up in the fountain anyway.

making this was a little while ago now, but i finally did it, i made a recipe following a b. dylan hollis video! the coffee loaf from 1959– surprisingly, i had all of the ingredients on hand (including powdered milk?!) and i was so excited by this that I didn’t stop to ask whether i *should* make this caffeinated baked good. recipe worked well, the consistency was great and all, but a single square inch of it and i feel like i’ve single-handedly drunk a pot of strong coffee. this is a me problem, i’ll grant you, but it is amusing to me that i’ve made a cake I physically cannot eat too much of in a single sitting. it is drying out in the fridge as we speak. heart palpitations aside, i am proud of it though.

working on it occurred to me today to look back at the timeline i made for myself at the beginning of the month, and i’m four days past the first deadline on it without having even really touched the chapter itself. blargh. sent two emails yesterday, and two that had been worrying me the day before, and worked a bit on the newsletter today. chipping away at things.

[incalculablepower]

some fics i've liked lately

it's been a weird year. when i made this list of recs back in january i fully intended it to become a monthly thing, but life happened and then i guess it just kept happening. in early 2023 things were ramping up in my new career, i was practicing and playing a lot with my band to prepare for our first show, i was settling into dealing with depression and anxiety with medication, i was getting over a miserable breakup. then i fell in love. i lost my job (the best and most favourite job i've ever had) abruptly this past may. this is my longest period of unemployment since i was a teenager and while you think it would be the best time to lose yourself in fandom, i felt the opposite. fandom was such a lifeline to me when i had a miserable job and was in a bad relationship and needed an escape but i was very present in my own life this summer. i took my partner to visit my family and spent a lot of time with friends and played shows (and recorded some music... shameless self promo once again) and in between i watched so much star trek on my couch. this is such a long preamble to explain why i haven't been fandoming as much lately and why idk if i'll write anything again anytime soon (let's say, once i have a job i want to procrastinate at) but -- i HAVE been reading fic! not as much as before, but i have been, and there's enough for a fic rest list so that's what i'm giving you today. when times are dire [podfic] - @aibidil

drarry. i have such a soft spot for middle aged draco and harry falling in love, the relationships they have with their friends and their grown children. @aibidil reads her own podfics and it's an utter delight. i usually only listen to podfics or audiobooks when i'm doing work around the house but i can going on walks with my headphones just so i could listen to more of this one.

purple haze by @ashesandhackles

romione. i was so so honoured to see this pop up in my ao3 gifts during @thethreebroomsticksfic pride fest this year. it turns the well tread romione ground of shell cottage and the yule ball over a bit, using them as settings to explore a confusing mix of jealousy and sexuality for ron and hermione. ashes knows i love mess with these and it captures that teenage chaos wonderfully, then lets them laugh at it as secure and settled adults.

crookshanks by @ala-baguette

gen. warning that this is a tearjerker, especially if you've ever loved and lost a pet. i think the pure and simple expressions of love and gratitude from crook's pov here would be a comfort to any pet owner.

at some point this year, i got REALLY into the idea of a one-sided dramione. it's hard to look for, especially since it's such a popular ship but i managed to find a few that scratched the itch until i find the time and/or motivation to write one of my own new years eve by 2daughtersofathena, the guardian angel by mylifebelongstothebbc, and a boy of hans by elixirsoflife. the last one being my personal favourite, a grim take on the hanahaki disease trope.

every mother is a grave by witchofimber

this was recced by @whinlatter in @thethreebroomsticksfic discord (btw i feel like no one on my followers lists needs anyone to remind them to read beasts -- but please read beasts) and when i saw "gillian flynn treatment" in the tags i slammed the mark for later button. this is probably the most balanced and realistic portrayals of molly weasley and her role as a mother that i've ever read in hp fic. it's not weasley family fluff but it doesn't devolve into something so flat as bashing either. molly is regular mother with flaws and strengths like anyone else and how they amplify and shift with love and grief and pain and stress and duty and pressure. every single relationship she has with her children is uniquely expressed and the way it ties the past to the direct aftermath of the war is so well done and a great way to organize this giant, messy family. particular care here went into fred and george, giving them their own identities in a way that can be difficult, given the source material. a favourite line:

“Probably have tried to make us name the twins after them.” He stopped laughing, sucked in a breath. “Do you want to?”  For a second she considered it. It would be wonderful, getting to use those names again like living things. But -  “No,” she said. “I - if they were alive, I’d have said no, so I’m saying it now. Let the boys be their own people.”  The truth was that she didn’t want to lose her brothers. To have their faces erased in her memory, painted over with her sons. To have to say no, not THAT Fab, I mean UNCLE Fab - he died before you were born. Anyway, she liked the names Fred and George. It was easier like this. 

the scrunchie by @saintsenara

another fic i've meant to read for ages and finally got around to just yesterday. the background drama of these side characters as a cheap scrunchie from boots floats around them is so perfectly teenage. reminds me of the other series i loved as a teenager around the time HP was coming out: georgia nicolson and gossip girl. i could also compare it to derry girls a little, how despite the environment surrounding them these girls are still being girls, arguing about stupid things and getting crushes on boys and having the absolute most ridiculous blowout fights with your sister (parvati and padma's portrayal here is probably my favourite i've ever read!)

i also can't leave without reccing @saintsenara's wip, one year in every ten. i can't get enough of a good case fic. tomarry/harrymort (both versions of this ship, oddly, apply to this fic) is not something i've ever sought out but i really think the way it's handled here could win over any non-believer. it's sharp and funny in a way that makes it turns into poignancy hit even harder. i screenshotted two full phone screen pages of chapter 27 so i could go back and read them over and over. it might be one of the best things i've ever read from ron's POV (emphasis mine):

It had been a long ten years, with a chair at their table always left empty and a hole in their hearts always unfilled. Grief was exhausting and boring and dully painful, like a slightly sprained ankle which you can still walk on, but which always bothers you a little bit.  But there had been love among the grief. There had been love before the grief - indeed love had caused the grief - and there had been love after. His love for his parents and his siblings had changed, the way wine left in a barrel changes and becomes richer and deeper. There was more sorrow in the love, as he threw a quaffle around with George and saw the tired lines at the corner of his eyes. There was more recrimination, more struggle with the mistakes they had all made in the past, as he finally sat down and had a real chat with mum and dad about how a lifetime of corned-beef sandwiches and maroon jumpers had made him feel. But there was more joy there too. And with joy came forgiveness and understanding and hope and fun.

image used is wildflowers (1915) by tom thomson

[hyperfixatedonstuff]

hello!! do you have any tf2 headcanons? i got neck-deep into this fixation without realizing and your scout fic in your pinned made me tear up just a bit- :')

i understand that fixation part so much😭 i’m out here rereading all the comics to write a drabble abt Zhanna bc i will NOT mischaracterize my girl! anyways i’m glad u liked the scout fic and since i don’t want this post to be 10 million words long i’ll do mainly Scout headcanons

Scout definitely took a year or two of Spanish in highschool and will respond to his team mates with “de nada” and “gracias” when they speak another language (german, french, russian, etc)

I headcanon that Pyro is strangely fluent in multiple languages as well but no one can understand them properly anyways

Heavy or Medic will make some rude or funny comment in Russian/German and Pyro will laugh along with them

At first they find it odd but I think Heavy in particular would really enjoy being understood in his native language even if he doesn’t understand ANY language Pyro speaks

I’m a big fan of Lesbian Miss Pauling! so when she tells Scout I see a few options: Scout will come out as trans fem a year or so later and ask her out again. or! Scout will have this huge moment of realization and apologize to her a ton, then try to become her wingman(both suck at talking to women).

Scout sees Medic and Heavy kiss once and then goes and asks Spy if gay people are real

Spy does all sorts of cheesy things for Scout’s mom and she loves it but makes fun of him so much

Scout is allergic to sooo many things but claims that if they eat them fast enough it won’t matter(cue lots of medic bay trips and a pissed off Medic)

Scout finally starts to crack Sniper’s tough guy loner mask and finds out he’s actually a huge ass loser

Spy HATES every love interest Scout has except for Miss Pauling but only because he knows they’re not gonna end up together

the only person Scout can beat in an arm wrestle is Spy and maybe Sniper

Scout and Medic go for runs together occasionally

Medic has to annually replace Spy’s lungs. He’s had all different kinds of fucked up animal lungs.

Scout learns best by actually doing something/practically applying it. if that makes sense

He’s also super good at literary analysis and character analysis but has trouble reading the actual words. He’ll listen to audiobooks instead sometimes but prefers comics.

Scout has probably accidentally called some of the mercs his brothers’ names and then got really embarrassed and ran away

Kinda random but Medic has and will brain scoop/ lobotomize people who saw him do something even mildly embarrassing

[frodo-with-glasses]

More Reading Thoughts: The Scouring of the Shire

YOOOOOO HECK YEAH LET’S GOOOOOOOOO

(Okay so I downloaded Phil Dragash’s reading of this and listened to it on the longest plane flight of my trip and may or may not have made a total fool of myself grinning at it throughout LOLOL)

(But I didn’t have time to write my reactions to it until now so here we go)

“On the further side of the river they could see that some new houses had been built…all very gloomy and un-Shirelike” Uh-oh.

BAHAHAHA the way Sam immediately goes OFF

“SCREW YOU AND YOUR STUPID SIGN TOO”

I love Merry trying to be a diplomat

Frodo like “oh goodness gracious, now what trouble has that Lotho gotten up to with MY house”

(Also that little bit of stealth sass like “well I’m GLAD he’s not calling himself a Baggins anymore, I can pretend I’m not associated with him”)

Merry be like “Fine, if you won’t open this gate, I’LL OPEN IT FOR MYSELF”

YO WHAAAAAT?? BILL FERNY?????

I mean I can’t say that I’m happy to see him but also it’s kinda fun to be this surprised. I’d forgotten all about him being here!

Haha the way he immediately runs away from Merry once he’s challenged tho

“Neat work, Bill!” HAHAHAHA

EAT PONY HOOF, LOSER

GOOD JOB BILL (the pony)

I love the fact that 50% of the hobbits’ intimidation factor comes from the fact that Merry and Pippin are so BigTM (and the other 50% is Swords)

Pippin listening to all this talking like “heck, I’m tired and wet and I don’t have time for this, just let me sleep in a shack if you want” is such a mood

Also Pippin tearing down the rule lists LOL

Sam has had it up to HERE with this nonsense

Me, at all the burning going on: “Uh-oh.”

“Looking both important and rather scared” Heehee X-D

“‘What’s all this?’ said Frodo, feeling inclined to laugh.” Me too, Frodo!

“Calling your Chief Names, Wishing to punch his Pimply Face, and Thinking you Shirriffs look a lot of Tom-fools.” OKAY SAM GO OFF LOLOL

OKAY SO at this point in the audiobook Mr. Dragash had the most BRILLIANT reading for this line:

“To the discomfiture of the Shirriffs Frodo and his companions all… [dramatic pause, then raucous laughter erupts in the background] …roared with laughter.”

I LOVE IT SO MUCH IT’S SO PERFECT AHAHAHA

He also had a great reading for this part:

The sheriff, shouting after them, insistent but nervous: “But don’t forget! I’ve arrested you!” Frodo, with the softest voice ever: “I won’t. Never. But I may forgive you.”

Sam has a friend! :-D

I mean I’m sorry that this is the way we find it out but he has!! A buddy!!

Now I’m sure “cock-robin” must have had a different meaning in Tolkien’s time…

“If I hear not allowed much oftener, I’m going to get angry.” Same, Sam.

Eeeew the table hasn’t been scrubbed for WEEKS?? I can only imagine it looking like the underside of a restaurant table, months-old crusty chewing gum stuck on it and all. Blergh 🤮

LOLOL “They would have started earlier, only the delay so plainly annoyed the sheriff-leader”

Our four hobbits have come back from their adventure so delightfully full of SassTM

My word, if I keep pointing out every funny thing that happens here I’ll be writing down the whole chapter. Look at the hobbits hustling the sheriffs who were supposed to be “arresting” them!

NOW WHO’S ARRESTED WHO INDEED 🤣🤣

For someone who’s supposed to be arrested, it sure looks like Merry is the one who’s in charge :-3

And all the sheriffs like “WE GIVE UP” and the hobbits like “okay :-D”

ROBIN WAS ONE OF THE SHERIFFS THAT THEY WERE MESSING WITH OH NO 🤣🤣

“We shall break a good many things yet, and not ask you to answer. Good luck to you!” OKAY PIPPIN GO OFF

(......This is getting very long so I’m gonna put the rest under a read-more)

Nooooo look what they’ve done to Hobbiton D-8

This whole conversation is so tense. I find myself wanting to cheer on the hobbits’ comebacks, but the ruffian here always gets the upper hand in the next line…

DON’T SNAP YOUR FINGERS IN FRODO’S FACE!! Heckin’ RUDE! Only the Sackville-Bagginses have ever done that, and that’s BEFORE Frodo saved the world! D-:<

HECK YES, PIPPIN!! TELL ‘EM!!

“Down on your knees in the road and ask pardon, or I will set this troll’s bane in you!” >8-D Friendly reminder that Pippin stabbed a troll in the gut to sAVE BEREGOND— *is slapped*

The fact that Pippin, Merry and Sam immediately jump to Frodo’s defense, but Frodo does not. That says so much about their friendship, and about Frodo, and how they all see themselves and their roles in this story…and it’s so sad that Frodo hangs back, not even willing to defend himself…

But also how bad*ss is that, letting your three armed friends charge to your defense while you just sit there impassively?? It’s like the “cool guys don’t look at explosions” trope.

Pippin has exactly the childish drive for revenge that you’d think he would, but Frodo sees the reality of the situation and knows Lotho has been played as a puppet and is now a prisoner to his own schemes. Good stuff.

Frodo: “Violence isn’t the answer.” Merry: “You’re right. It’s the question, and the answer is yes.”

MERRY’S SPEECH HERE YESSSS

(The way the music swelled here in Dragash’s audiobook was so good ahahaha)

“Come on! I am going to blow the horn of Rohan, and give them all some music they have never heard before.”

OH.

HECK.

YEEEEAAAHHH!!!!!!! >8-D

(And this was the part of the audiobook where I grinned like an idiot and clapped my hands and bounced a little in my seat and probably confused the guy in the seat next to me LOLOL)

Sam HIMSELF wants to turn back for the horn call!! And so does Bill! Aaaaahhh!!

AWAKE! AWAKE! FEAR, FIRE, FOES! AWAKE!!

This was so well foreshadowed by the Ringwraiths in Buckland at the beginning of the book I cannot bELIEVE—!!

TOLKIEN YOU GENIUS

(Writer Brain is just buzzing with this right now, sorry, LOL)

“And your face is no worse than it was, Sam.” Is Farmer Cotton calling Sam ugly?? 🤣🤣 He’s roasting his future son-in-law LOLOL I love him already

Even Farmer Cotton ships Sam and Rosie ROFL

Rosie just asked why you left Mister Frodo! What do you do??

>Tell her you love her

>Run away

Sam ran away! (What a mood)

I love that they built the fire just for fun and because it’s against the rules, LOL! A fire is exactly the thing that would cheer me up too!!

I assume Robin was one of the sheriffs that took off his feather and joined in the revolt :-D

Merry like, “See, Frodo?? Violence!!”

“Good for the Tooks!” HECK YEAH

“I’ll bring you an army of Tooks in the morning!” HECK YEAH!!

It’s so sweet of Frodo to be like “I still don’t want anyone to die” but also still turning the logistics over to Merry’ cause he’s The Plan Guy

What have I said all along?? Merry is the Smart One :-D

FARMER COTTON JUST SITTING BY THE FIRE

WAITING FOR THEM TO COME

Okay Sam’s father-in-law is heckin’ BAD*SS I LOVE HIM

This is literally “put down your weapons, I’ve got a sniper with a bead on you”

“He aimed a savage blow at Merry who stood in his way. He fell dead with four arrows in him.” YOOOOOOOOO!!

I like to think Merry didn’t even flinch. Just like…watched him keel over dead. HECK.

I love how bad*ss all the hobbits get to be in this chapter ahahaha

Aaaaand all the others give up. Nice >:-D

Aww, Farmer Cotton and the Gaffer are friends! And Cotton would have housed the Gaffer himself if he could have!! I love how sweet they all are to each other ^-^

HA! Okay, Lobelia, that’s pretty cool, I admit. Maybe you’re all right after all. ;-P

The Gaffer just telling Frodo off for leaving 🤣🤣 And Frodo politely apologizing!! Because even though the Gaffer’s problems are small in comparison to everything else happening in the world, they’re still important! I’m love

AAAAAHHHHH FRODO GASSING UP SAM IN FRONT OF HIS DAD AND ROSIE AND EVERYBODY 8-D 8-D 8-D

This is so stinkin’ cute. Lookit my silver-tongued Baggins using his Words of Affirmation again! It’s the least he can do to repay Sam for all he’s done, but I think it’s the thing that means the most to Sam.

Frodo: “Indeed, if you will believe it, he’s now one of the most famous people in all the lands, and they are making songs about his deeds from here to the Sea and beyond the Great River!” Sam: 😳😅☺️ Rosie: 😲😍🥰 The Gaffer: “Sounds fake but okay”

THE TOOKS ARE HEREEEEE

I frickin’ love the “lure them into a trap and surround them with hobbits” tactic. You never think hobbits can be scary until there are A LOT OF THEM VERY SUDDENLY

I also think this is a fun use of the hobbits’ canonical superpower of staying hidden in plain sight.

HECK YEAHHHHH MERRY LET’S GO

Seventy ruffians dead, and only nineteen hobbits on the other. As casualties go, that’s not bad! Sad that any hobbits died at all, of course, but it’s a relatively clean victory.

Also the book gets Very Historical for a moment and I think that’s Very Funny

Heck yeah Cottons!

HECK YEAH MERRY AND PIPPIN!!

And Frodo does his part by protecting the ruffians who surrendered! The pacifist has a role to play. :-D

Noooo, look what they’ve done to Bag End!! D-8

NOOOOOO THE PARTY TREEEEE 😭😭😭

ME TOO, SAM, UWAAAAAHHH—

(Ted Sandyman accidentally foreshadowing Sam going over the Sea??)

Frodo is very right. If more hobbits are like Ted, the Shire is in real trouble. Worse is the enemy within than the enemy from without. :-/

“Save your breath! I’ve a better.” HAHAHA YES MERRY LET’S GO

Oh but look what they’ve done to Bag Endddd 😭😭😭

“Yes, this is Mordor.” Thanks, I hate it :-C

“If I had known all the mischief he had caused, I should have stuffed my pouch down Saruman’s throat.” Dude Merry sounded so angry in Phil Dragash’s audiobook here. (Also can’t believe that Merry’s bag has become the running joke that it is LOLOL)

>8-O >8-O >8-O SARUMAN!!

Saruman: “Ah, yes, they called me Sharkey in Isengard! A sign of affection, possibly.” Tolkien, in a footnote: “It was not, in fact, a sign of affection.”

I….do not like….how Saruman casts such aspersions on Gandalf. Nor how his accusations almost seem to have some merit at the moment. “When his tools have done their task he drops them.” That is dangerously close to accurate, or at the moment it feels like it is. Gandalf did leave them, even knowing that things were going wrong in the Shire…

But at the same time, it’s not Gandalf’s job to fix everything himself! The hobbits got to participate in the saving of their world, and they got the honor and the renown and the incredible experiences and the personal growth that comes along with it. Same thing here; they get the opportunity to be the heroes and save their own home. It isn’t easy, but it is good, and it has its own rewards.

“Well, if that’s what you find pleasure in, I pity you.” Frodo couldn’t be more right. Anyone who takes pleasure and comfort in the pain and misery of others is a pitiable person.

Frodo still refuses to kill. His home was defiled…his last comfort stolen…and his honor insulted to his face…and he still refuses to kill Saruman. Holy cow that takes some major strength of character. What an absolute chad.

YO WHAT

SARUMAN TRIED TO STAB FRODO

(And Sam leads the charge to avenge Frodo because Of Course He Does)

AND FRODO STILL WILL NOT KILL

THE ABSOLUTELY CHADDERY OF THIS HOBBIT

Talk about heaping coals on your enemy’s head, bruh. Even Saruman has to respect it.

And Frodo extending the olive branch to Wormtongue. Truly the G.O.A.T.

>8-O

EYOOOO??

WORMTONGUE KILLED LOTHO??

AND MAYBE A T E HIM????

Holy COW this got dark 0_o

(Also Dragash made Wormtongue sound absolutely miserable on that “you told me to; you made me do it”)

Aaaand Saruman is dead

And Wormtongue is dead

Something something Saruman’s spirit looking to the West, from which he came, and where he can never return again, and then being blown away to nothingness…

It really is the saddest thing that the end of the war happens at the door of Bag End. Nowhere is safe. The movies have the hobbits return to an unchanged Shire, realizing that they’re the ones who’ve been changed by their experiences, and they’ll never be able to see home the same way again (which is, I think, analogous to the experience of American Vietnam vets)…..but here in the book, the war comes home, marring the very land that our heroes set out to protect, which is what Tolkien experienced at the end of the Great War. They’re different kinds of tragedy, and they both hurt, but I think this one is just an edge more bitter.

…..Anyway, I loved this chapter! It ends with on a downer note, but the rest of it was a lot of fun. X-P

[loveroftoomanyfandoms]

Angel of God, My Guardian Dear Chapter 17: Matt

Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+, MINORS DNI)

Story Summary: While speaking at a local school for visually impaired youth, Matt runs into his childhood best friend, with whom he lost touch almost 20 years prior.

Warning/Tags: Phone sex 🔥

Word Count: ~2k of pure porn

A/N: Enjoy some smut, y'all.

Matt sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he sat on his sofa listening to an audiobook he had gotten from the library the previous week. Y/N was out of town at a library conference and he was waiting for her to call.

His book automatically paused as his phone began to ring.

Matt smiled as he swiped to answer. "Hi, angel."

"Hi, Matty," Y/N replied. "How's it going?"

"It's going good. How's the conference?"

"It's fine, just the usual library stuff -- how to deal with difficult patrons, the depressing increase in book banning attempts by morons who've probably never read a book in their life, what to do when you're stuck at a library conference away from your very sexy boyfriend for 5 days…"

Matt grinned. "Learn anything interesting in that last session?"

Y/N huffed out a light laugh. "Actually, yeah, the presenter suggested calling him and telling him how much you miss him."

Matt chuckled, his heart warming. "I miss you too, angel."

He paused, listening for signs of anyone in Y/N's vicinity. "Are you settled in for the night?"

"Yeah, some of the others decided to go out for drinks but I wasn't feeling up to it. It's been a long conference and I haven't been sleeping too well."

Matt hummed. "Well maybe I can help you with that."

"Oh?" Y/N's voice piqued with interest. "How so, Mr. Murdock?"

Matt licked his lips. There had been something else he had been wanting to try with Y/N but the opportunity hadn't presented itself until now. "Remember how I helped you out the last time you couldn't sleep?"

Y/N let out a breathy laugh. "You mean how you made me come so hard my brain went completely blank for a moment? Yeah, I definitely remember that."

"Well, I was thinking maybe we could do something like that… just over the phone."

Y/N gasped playfully. "Matthew, are you suggesting that we have phone sex?"

Matt hummed. "Maybe… if you're interested."

"Oh, I'm very interested. Give me just a second to get situated though?"

Matt moved from the sofa to his bedroom. "Sure, angel."

"Are you in bed?"

"I will be in a minute. I was sitting on the sofa."

"Oh, okay." Y/N paused. "Just for the record… I, uh, I've never done this before, so… apologies if I'm awkward."

Matt shook his head even though he knew Y/N couldn't see him. "Hey, no, it's okay. To be honest, I haven't actually done this either, but it's just like our sexy talk at home, right? Except we'll just have to also tell each other what we'd like to be doing instead of actually doing it."

He grinned and dropped his voice down a register. "Plus you know how much I love the sound of your voice, angel. Can't wait to hear you while you're touching yourself for me."

Y/N sucked in a breath. "Okay."

"Are you settled into bed yet?"

"Uh huh. Oh wait, what are you wearing?"

Matt could feel Y/N cringe over the phone. While yes, that was typically a pretty stereotypical lead-in to phone sex, it actually was a pretty important question since they couldn't see each other. 

"Actually I just got out of the shower about 20 minutes ago, so I'm wearing a pair of boxers. What about you? What are you wearing?"

"Oh, um…" Y/N paused as she pulled the covers over her. "A black tank top and black and red plaid pajama pants."

Matt settled in his bed. "Those soft cotton ones you like to lounge around in?"

"Uh huh."

"Mmm, good to know. I like those on you." Matt grinned. "I like them even better on my bedroom floor."

Y/N huffed out a laugh. "Smooth, Murdock."

"Just telling the truth, angel." Matt sighed. "I wish you were here in my bed right now, because you know what I would do?"

Y/N's breath hitched. "Uh-uh, what?"

"I'd cup your face in my hands and kiss you. Love kissing you, angel, thought about it for years before I got the chance."

Y/N let out a breathy sigh. "Mmm, me too, Matty, used to stare at your mouth all the time when we were kids, wanted to know what your lips would feel like pressed to mine."

Matt groaned softly. "God, Y/N, had I known how you actually felt about me back then I probably wouldn't have been able to help myself, would've had to find out what your lips tasted like, both with and without that coconut lip balm on them."

"Good thing you can kiss me all you want now, hmm?"

Matt smiled. "Mmhmm. I'd kiss you breathless then tangle my fingers in your hair and tilt your head to the side so I could move down to your neck. Love to feel your pulse flutter under my lips, angel, have to hold back from marking you and feeling the blood rise to the surface of your delicate skin." 

Y/N's breath hitched. "No, baby, don't hold back. Want you to mark me, Matty."

Matt closed his eyes, picturing Y/N whimpering underneath him in pleasure as he tattooed his name in Braille on her skin, soothing each mark his lips left with his tongue before moving on to the next one. "Fuck -- don't tempt me, angel."

"Love to wear your marks on me, sweetheart, know that it's you who put them there." Y/N giggled. "My sexy vampire."

Matt grinned. "Mmm, definitely going to have to mark you up when you get home then, remind you who you belong to."

"Mmmhmm. So what else would you do?"

"I'd slide the hand that wasn't buried in your hair underneath your tank top so I could feel your soft skin." Matt let out a quiet groan. "Used to dream about it when we were younger, sweetheart, what your body would feel like under my hands and mouth if I ever got you in my bed other than to sleep."

"Mmm, and?"

Matt groaned. "The real thing is even better than I imagined. You feel so fucking incredible, Y/N, want you all the time."

He licked his lips as he heard the shuffle of clothing. "Touch yourself for me, angel."

Y/N sighed. "Mmm, Matty, love to feel your hands on my skin, baby, whether you're being gentle and caressing me while we're making love or gripping my hips tight while you fuck me into oblivion."

Matt hissed, his cock starting to stir. "Take your top off for me, sweetheart, want to hear your hand caressing that soft, smooth skin of yours."

He could hear Y/N pulling her shirt up and over her head. "That's my good girl."

Y/N hummed. "What would you do once you got my top off?"

"I'd move down to those perfect tits of yours. First I'd start with the left one, tease it to a peak with my tongue before getting my mouth properly on it." Matt groaned as Y/N gasped out a breath. "That's right, angel, touch yourself for me, imagine those are my hands caressing you."

Y/N's breath hitched. "Mmm, Matty, your hands feel so good on my skin, love the way you touch me."

Matt groaned. "By now I'd be able to smell just how fucking wet you were for me, angel. God, your scent is intoxicating."

"Mmhmm, just for you, Matty. Only you make me feel this way, God , you turn me on so much." Y/N let out a soft moan. "Want your mouth on me, sweetheart, need you."

Matt pulled his boxers down, freeing his cock. "Need my mouth on that beautiful cunt of yours, angel?"

"Uh huh. Feels so fucking good, Matt, God , that mouth of yours is magical."

Matt wrapped a hand around himself. "Mmm, well since you asked so sweetly I'd kiss my way down your stomach while I slowly slid your pajamas down, then when I finally had you naked I'd have to kiss and feel my way down your body one more time before I got to taste your sweetness."

Y/N whimpered. "God yes, please , Matty, want you to make me come on your mouth."

"Go ahead, angel, let me hear how wet you are for me." Matt groaned at the slick slide of Y/N inserting two fingers into herself. "You taste so fucking good, Y/N, could spend hours eating out that beautiful cunt of yours, see how many times I can make you come on my tongue alone."

Y/N gasped. "Fuck, Matt ."

Matt spit in his hand before taking himself once again, the dryness of his hand alone uncomfortable in its friction. "As good as you taste, it's nothing compared to the feeling of being buried deep inside your tight cunt, so once I had drunk my fill of your juices I'd slide my cock through your folds getting myself nice and slick, then I'd ease myself inside you. Gotta start out nice and slow, angel, don't want to hurt you."

Y/N bit back a moan. "Mmph -- fuck. You're so big, Matt, always make me feel so full, baby, stretch me out so good."

Matt sped his hand up. "Your pussy feels amazing, Y/N, like it was made perfectly to fit my cock."

"Feel so good inside me every time, Matt." Y/N sucked in a breath. "Love to feel your cock in me, sweetheart, fucking me so deep, filling me up."

Matt groaned. "Can't wait until you get home, sweetness, miss you so much."

"Fuck, Matty, miss you too, baby, hate not being able to see you, to touch you. Need you inside me, Matt, wanna feel you." Y/N gasped. "Want you to grip my hips tight while you pound into me, make me feel you deeper than ever before."

"Oh, don't worry, angel, gonna stuff you nice and full when you get home, come so deep in that tight wet cunt of yours that you feel my cum inside you for days ." Matt hissed, his orgasm edging closer. "Gonna come for me, angel?"

"Uh huh. Close, Matty."

Matt tightened his grip on himself. "Me too, Y/N. Fuck, you always take me so well, sweetheart, such a good girl for me."

"God -- yes, yours , Matty, always." Y/N's breath hitched. "I'm so close, baby."

Matt pitched his voice lower. "Want you to let go for me, angel, let me hear those pretty sounds you make for me while I'm filling your pussy up with my cum."

Y/N gasped. "Yes , Matt , sweetheart, want to feel it, want to -- Ah !"

Matt jerked himself roughly a few more times, the sound of Y/N crying out his name in ecstasy making him groan as ropes of hot cum shot out onto his stomach. 

He could hear Y/N panting on the other end as she came down from her high. "Fuck, Y/N ."

Y/N hummed. "Mmm, love you."

"Love you too." Matt grabbed a few tissues and wiped the quickly cooling cum off of himself. "Feel better?"

"Mmhmm." Y/N sighed. "Still miss you, baby, but luckily I'm just gone for a few more days."

Matt grinned. "I miss you too, and whenever you get home I'm going to show you just how much I'm missing you."

Y/N huffed out a light laugh. "Mmm. Is that a promise?"

"Oh, definitely. You're not leaving my bed for at least 24 hours."

"Deal." Y/N yawned. "I'll call you tomorrow?"

Matt nodded. "Okay, angel. I love you."

"Love you too."

"Sweet dreams."

"Mmm, you too, Matty. 'Bye, baby."

"Bye."

Matt hung up and pulled his boxers up, then lay in bed for a moment silently contemplating before getting up and going to his Daredevil trunk.

He pulled out the small square box he had hidden the day before and ran his hand over the contents, smiling softly before setting it back in his trunk.

He went back into his bedroom as his phone rang once again. "Hello, this is Matthew Murdock."

He grinned. "Yes, hi, thank you for getting back to me. I'm sorry for bothering you, but I need a favor…"

[meraki-yao]

List of thoughts while listening to the RWRB audiobook while drawing Alex during my drawing class (27 9 2023)

Preface: I have an hour of sketch class every week that I've been taking for 11 years now, I love it and my teacher is basically my Godfather at this point.

I'm learning to draw portraits and my teacher lets me pick the photo. I picked Alex, and I listen to the RWRB audiobook while I draw. Today's my second lesson on him, and I went through Ch6 to the first ten minutes of Ch7 (so that's state dinner, Alex's room, polo, the first few emails, Paris, Alex's birthday, to Alex's learning more about both Henry and himself)

I had to press my hand against my mouth to stop me from laughing out loud or grinning too crazily

The narrator is good at the delivery of Alex's line (I mean he's not Taylor but as a performance on its own it's pretty good) but Henry's lines DO NOT WORK. I didn't realize it on my first listen, but the British accent is just... It doesn't work, and neither does the line delivery itself. Alex's lines sound like a young man but Henry's lines sound like someone in his forties.

The corresponding movie scenes flash before my eyes whenever I listen to a scene that's in the movie

Also, certain things appear in a different order in the movie but there are a lot of smaller lines and details from the book that the film included

This morning found another AI-generated reading of the emails (this one is "you are a dark sorcerer with both Henry/Nick and Alex/Taylor, but I'm guessing the database used for the generation of this one isn't as complete cuz honestly it sounds kinda off) but that and listening to the actual audiobook made me realize as much as OH MY FUCKING GOD I NEED A FULL CAST AUDIOBOOK suddenly I can't imagine the boys reading it as an audiobook anymore? Like I'm used to hearing them in character full on acting out the scene but I just realized an audiobook is an entirely different form of performance: a dialogue, a quip like the one in the movie After the ass grope in the state dinner, the boys have a quick, continuous rhythm, but with narration, an audiobook doesn't have that. Plus I can't imagine the spicy scenes having the same intensity of delivery as a performance without being a continuously spoken through scene with kissing and wet noises, as it has be interrupted by the narration (that being said I NEED THE FULL CAST AUDIOBOOK)

It's just the second lesson/hour so all I have is a very, very rough outline sketch (I cannot emphasize how true "trust the process" is in art, it will look awful for a while until you slowly add in more details) but my teacher said I improved a lot and you can tell it's Alex (won't post any progress photos because it's... It's a long as fuck process, it's gonna take a couple of months, but when I'm done I'm definitely posting it)

[feysandfeels]

LUISA READS FOURTH WING :)

Right fam, time for some dragon riding (non sexual… from what I have been able to gather)

Ngl, but reading (listening) the "a dragon without its rider is a tragedy, a rider without its dragon is dead" after seeing so many tiktoks about it and them being all epic, has me giddy, has me excited. Here we go.

So far we have a cunty yet caring elder sister, a dead dad, a rude as fuck mum, a dead brother (who apparently was beloved above all) and a girl severely lacking in calcium.

"you won't get any special treatment just for being my daughter" my sister in christ, what special treatment? so far you have been nothing like an ass.

I cannot judge Violet for wanting to take her books with her....but babygirl from what I have seen you truly have no strength.. so like..sugar.. either develop some muscle or like let it go.

What's so wrong about being a scribe? like what do you all have against academia?

Okay no wait... what are they prepping her for? What the fuck is this subscription day? isn't it like just first day of uni?? Is she fighting? is it a race? to like the first dragon they can find? the first tunnel of their respective career?

aaaaaaaand here comes the childhood friend with soft brown eyes that laughs with his whole body.

Seems like extremely poor parenting to send your extremly untrained daughter into such a challenge... like she has to climb some rocks... and like run a lot, there's going to be wind. Like no. And for what? for the glory of your name? SHE CAN'T EVEN LIFT HER OWN BOOKS!

Gotta love a "This isn't America's TOP BEST FRIEND" moment.

I'm sorry but how is conscribing (?) all children from the traitors to the best school in the kingdom/republic/empire/country and give them a solid ass chance of becoming riders, and therefore climb to the top of the social and military pyramid a fitting punishment? They should have ended their respective bloodlines. You rebel you and your entire bloodline die.

Colombian brain translating Xaden to Xavier.

I should have asked... can dragons talk in this world?

What is the parapit?? Is that how it is written?

Mira (?) is a badass. Queen behaviour.

Mira being like "don't die Violet, I'd hate to be an only child." And having seen her mother? Honestly same. Like no. Hard Pass.

Wait is the blonde guy she is befriending the one with the scar from the betrayal?? Dylan? yes? no?

Oh and they get to marry after graduating. Why do I feel I am walking straight into another early 20s marriage.

Most riders are legacies... good to see nepotism is alive and well. Neporiders.

Oh so Xaden has tattoos from his wrist up to his jaw.. okay, okay.

AND HIS FATHER KILLED HER OLDER BROTHER. AND THEY WERE ROOMATES!

My girl really went "He is #SoTall and #HandsomeAsHell"

I don't get what this challenge is about and apparently Dylan is not making it, he liked slipped or smth and is like hanging...

yeah no he fell to his death. RIP Dylan.

My girl is like screaming history facts to distract herself while she [insert the challenge.... I think it's walking a very slippery bridge]

Okay so Jack is an asshole... it's giving Cato.

Kinda want to bet that he will try to eventually fight Violet and Xaden will defend her.

Got confirmation, it is in fact a bridge.

Rihannon made it. Which is a personal win because she seems sweet.

Oh my god Jack focus on your own thing, you are being and asshole, no one cares. Fuck off, fall to your death, shut up. Like why are you so pressed about this random ass calcium lacking girl. GET A JOB. STAY AWAY FROM HER.

Not her reciting the codex lol it is giving Elizabeth Swann citing The Pirate Code to Captain Barbossa. Babygirl, bless you, but he clearly does not give a fuck.

Violet truly made that crossing out of delulu energy and history facts and honestly? respect.

Wait, hold the fuck on... this audiobook is 21h long? what on god's green earth is going to happen in this book? oh my god this thread is going to be huge. Apologies to all.

omg Jack why are you still talking? either shut up or jump infront of a dragon and die. LIKE WHY ARE YOU SO OBSESSED WITH HER? He is giving blonde guy energy (but not the one you gave Dylan. RIP Dylan. You will never be forgotten)

aaaaaahhh there we go Jack threatened her and when he makes the move to kill her Xaden will be like "the fuck bro" and kill him instead.

Here comes the childhood best friend. I feel he is hot. Dane? Dane Atos?? Kinda hot of him. Wait he is Squad Leader? that's hot.

[pumpumdemsugah]

I feel you on the video essays. Interesting titles most of the time very little content of worth your other anon reminded me of Fab Socialism’s video “If Saweetie is Black then I just be SuperNegro” which made me laugh and click but I couldn’t tell you the content of the video tbh I mostly go on YouTube to learn or listen to music so hearing people have favourite video people to the point of paying for their videos blows me I know they’re some good ones on there but digging through the slop has never been worth it for me. But I’m biased because I don’t like the video format for information sharing like I’ll rather just read

Right!!

When I realised the titles are clickbait and I could never remember anything these people were saying I started blocking channels because what's the point ? I can read or listen to an audiobook if I want to learn

Rarely do these people ever have anything deep to say. Sure if you've never read anything about anything you might learn something but you might as well put on an audiobook and turn the volume all the way up if you're doing something mindless and want to listen to something

The most in-depth video essays are always about some niche decade old game someone has been obsessed with since they were like 6 lol. I only watch videos essays if it's obvious that person has a long standing obsession, because it's otherwise just slop

These people can pump out lazy shit because people are consuming it and buying the merch but no one wants to own up to creating an environment that scammers, liars and plagiarists can thrive in