#but it was also very hot :( and i had to swim around in a lake because it was hot :(

[keeps-ache]

too many thoughts i forgot all of them :[

[ellieswrldd]

*.✧ arabella ✧.*

pairing: brother's best friend! ellie williams x f!reader

summary: the last time ellie saw you, you were sweet and innocent. now, a year has passed and you've grown up.

content warnings: SMUT 18+ MDNI, a bit of angst, r has a tramp stamp (lower back tattoo) & is described to be a party girl, brief dry-humping/grinding, strap-on use (r!receiving), reverse cowgirl & doggystyle, praise & degradation, use of terms pretty girl & princess, ellie calls the strap her cock

a/n: very loosely inspired by that one ph video..iykyk! also, named after the am song bc i think it give the vibes i was going for teehee

The last time Ellie saw you, it was the summer before your freshman year of college. You were still rather innocent, not yet tainted by the bad behavior of others your age. You didn't party, kept away from alcohol and drugs, and preferred to spend your Friday nights reading in your room.

That was how she remembered you, her best friend's cute younger sister. She knew better than to get involved with you, honest to God, she did. The first day the two of you met, your brother had stated that if she were to get too close, she'd find herself with a black eye and a restraining order. But the last day before you left for college, Ellie found herself uneasy. She was nervous, nervous to be around you.

So when she found herself alone with you in your childhood bedroom, your brother stuffing your luggage into the car, Ellie felt herself losing her cool. It was an innocent kiss, sweet and meaningful. One that started when you began to pull away from her hug and looked at her with those beautiful doe-eyes. Her lips found yours with ease like she had been waiting for this moment. The sweet sigh that escaped you was what urged Ellie to pull away. She let her slim hands drop from your sides and turned away from you, awkwardly rubbing her neck. Ellie mumbled something along the lines of a 'sorry' and a 'goodbye' before going downstairs to talk to your brother. That was over a year ago when you were just nineteen. Now, you were back for the summer, excited to spend time with your brother after being swamped all year. You were different now, to say the least. Even though you were still funny and caring, you were far from the innocent girl Ellie once saw you as. You partied, you drank, and now you spent your Friday nights in the beds of hot girls who caught your eye. The morning after you arrived home, Ellie stumbled upon you in the kitchen. She was staying with your brother for the summer, and while she knew you would come home eventually, she didn't expect you to be so...changed.

You wore a fitted baby tee, cropped just above your navel, and a pair of snug, light-wash jean shorts that seemed to end right where your ass met your thighs. It was something Ellie would have never pictured you in.

You glanced at Ellie from where you stood in front of the fridge. "Oh, hey, Ellie," You greeted her softly, returning your focus to the contents of the refrigerator. "Y/n, I didn't know you were back." "Got in last night," You hummed, closing the fridge door with your hip. "Almost didn’t recognize you,” She chuckled awkwardly. “You seem..." "Sluttier?" You muttered. It wouldn't be your first, not even your third time hearing that one. It was a comment your old friends from high school loved to whisper to one another when encountering you on campus. "Older." Ellie rasped, stuffing her hands into the pockets of her sweatpants and briefly looking down at her feet. "Hm," You shrugged and bent down to rifle through a cabinet under the kitchen counter. Ellie's breath hitched slightly when she caught a glimpse of thick, dark lines imprinted on your lower back when you bent down.

A tattoo? She thought to herself as a bright pink blush painted her cheeks. The old you would never get a tattoo, you were always scared of how permanent tattoos were.

"I think I'm going to go for a morning swim in the lake, want to join?" Your eyes darted over to her green ones as you asked. "I'll have to pass, maybe some other time," Ellie said. You shrugged and brushed past her to slip out the back door. Watching you walk down the grassy path toward the lake, Ellie groaned softly and turned to go back upstairs.

You weren’t the sweet, pure girl she once thought you to be. You were a woman now. And Ellie was fucking screwed.

~~~~

You found yourself on the couch with your brother and Ellie later that week. The sun was long gone, and the only sounds you could hear were the crickets in the backyard and the audio from the movie playing on the tv.

Your brother sat between you and Ellie, chewing loudly on popcorn and whispering little comments about the movie to Ellie as they watched.

You stared at the tv lamely, you eyes occasionally flicking over to Ellie’s face. She looked just as bored as you were, a little tense if that. Was your presence affecting her?

After the movie finished, your elder brother stretched his hands high above his head and yawned.

“I’m heading upstairs, you coming Ellie?” He asked as he stood from the couch.

“Uh, yeah, I’ll be up in a few minutes.” She nodded and watched as he trudged up the stairs.

You flipped through the channels on the tv, purposefully staying silent as you felt Ellie’s eyes bore into you. It was the first time you two had been left alone with one another since your first morning back.

“It’s rude to stare, Els.” You mumbled as you put on another movie. You heard her take a deep breath and shift slightly.

“You’re fuckin’ killing me,” She whispered.

“Ellie—” You sighed.

“Listen, I shouldn’t have kissed you before you left. I know it was wrong.” Ellie interrupted. “But I don’t regret it, and I’m sorry for the pain I must’ve caused you.”

You turned to look at her finally.

“God, you’re such an asshole, Ellie.” You breathed.

“I know,” She said in a voice just louder than a whisper.

“After you kissed me, I lost myself a little bit. I was so confused and I didn’t want to even think about you,” You bit your lip. Every word you were saying was true, you didn’t want to think about Ellie, even just seeing your brother mention her name in a text made you think about the kiss.

You hated it, you didn’t want to think about the kiss because then your mind reminded you how she cowered away after. How she bolted the minute your lips parted. How the girl you had secretly pined after for so many years had simply left after kissing you.

It gave you a reason to drink, to party a little harder than you should’ve. You tried to forget, and you seeked comfort in the arms of different girls.

“And now, well now I’ve changed. I’m not that quiet girl who read on the porch while you did stick-and-poke tattoos with my brother beside me.” You laughed weakly. “I doubt that kiss meant anything to you, but it meant everything to me, and you fucking left without saying a word.”

Ellie stared at you for a moment, her mouth slightly open.

“You’re wrong,” She stated. “It meant so much to me, so much. It was shitty of me to kiss you then, but now that you know how I feel? I’m glad I did it. I would have talked to you and explained myself, I really would have, but I’m a fucking idiot, and I got scared. Does that make you feel better?” Ellie’s voice was a mix of a whisper and a shout as her wide eyes searched yours. Your breath stuttered slightly as you took in Ellie's expression. You had known her since you were merely ten years old when she was thirteen, and she had just met your brother. All those years of summers and weekends spent together, and you had never seen her look like this.

Her emerald eyes were full of need, love, and something else. Regret? Something like that. She looked thirsty, thirsty for your touch, your forgiveness, your loving.

Just like that moment a year ago, you leaned in your lips mere inches away from Ellie's. You felt her hot breath tickle your lips as she exhaled shakily. The sound of your brother walking down the stairs caused you to pull away from Ellie. He rifled through a cabinet, presumably looking for a midnight snack as you stood from the couch. Without another word, you walked past him and went to your room. You typed a quick message and sent it to Ellie. R: come to my room once my brother is asleep? E: I'll be there. Waiting for her was torturous, like waiting for a storm during a drought. Everything was on the table now after both of you completely spilled your hearts out of one another. Hearing that gentle knock on your door made your heart race. With a low creak, you opened your wooden door and tugged Ellie inside your room.

It was still girlish and organized from your high school years, tiny Polaroids and colorful posters littered your walls. It was home, like a snapshot of your old self. Ellie looked at you with an unreadable expression, her hands slowly finding their way to your waist.

“Tell me you want this,” She breathed, leaning her forehead against yours and closing her eyes.

“I don’t think I’ve wanted anything more.” You placed your hands on both sides of her face and leaned in to gently brush your lips against hers. It was just the ghost of a kiss, but as soon as it happened, it was like something snapped inside both of you.

Gentle, loving kisses quickly turned into ones full of fiery and heated passion. Ellie's hands roamed your body, squeezing and pulling you impossibly closer to her. Stumbling backward, your legs hit the edge of your bed, and you tugged Ellie down with you. She giggled softly against your skin, pulling you to straddle her hips. "I've wanted this..." Ellie groaned softly as your teeth sunk into the sensitive skin of her neck. "For so long..." She whispered and let her eyes shut. Her hands gripped at the flesh of your ass, slowly grinding your crotch against hers. A sharp gasp left your puffy lips as the friction rubbed against your clit and sent a wave of pleasure through you. "My brother would kill you if he knew," You whimpered as her hands moved your hips back and forth against hers. "So don't let him find out," Ellie chuckled and brushed her calloused thumb against your cheek. "Stay quiet, and we'll be fine. Yeah?" With that, she dragged your clothed cunt across her own, letting out ragged breaths as the two of you needily ground your hips against one another. "M-More, Ellie," You whispered as you grasped tightly at the hem of her t-shirt. "What do you need? My fingers?" She squeezed your ass. "Well," You bit your lip and hesitantly climbed off Ellie. You knelt down to the side of your bed and grabbed a box from underneath your bed. Just about the size of a shoe box, Ellie looked at you with a questioning expression. "I have this, it's brand new." Shyly, you passed a thick purple strap-on to Ellie, your face hot as she glanced at it. "Have you...used one of these before?" She asked cautiously. Ellie was soaked at the mere idea of fucking you with a strap, but she didn't want to rush you into anything you weren't completely sure of. You nodded slowly. "Have you?" She bit her cheek and nodded as well. It wasn't surprising, Ellie had been popular with girls since the beginning of high school and was far from a virgin. "Okay, are you sure you want this? 'Cause once we do this, there isn't any going back." Ellie murmured as she leaned in close to your face. "I'm sure, Els." You kissed her softly and watched as she quickly stripped herself of her baggy sweatpants. Ellie slid the dark straps around her hips, allowing the strap-on to rest comfortably over her navy blue boxers. Effortlessly, she pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it to the floor of your dark room. She chuckled softly when she caught you staring at her toned torso. "Can't fuck you with your clothes on, princess." Ellie grinned and glanced down at your flowy pajama shorts. You tugged your shorts off first, then your shirt came off, leaving you in only your panties. "Jesus Christ...what am I supposed to do with you?" Ellie mumbled as she watched you lay back on the bed and spread your legs for her. "Whatever you want," Ellie narrowed her eyes slightly, tracing over your nude figure. "Get up," You wasted no time obeying her command, standing up and waiting at the edge of the bed for her next instruction. She sat down on your bed, stretching out her legs and leaning against your headboard. Ellie pat her thigh. "C'mon," You straddle her hips, the dildo resting against your backside as you kiss her feverishly. Ellie took a deep breath and slid her hand past the waistband of your panties, and gently touched your sensitive clit. She brushed the tip of her middle finger along your aching slit, mouth falling slightly agape as her finger slid against your wetness. "So fucking wet," You gasped sharply and bucked your hips against her touch. "Bet you don't even need my fingers, already so wet for me, could probably just put the strap in right now," Ellie muttered against your ear as her fingers teased you. "P-Please..." "Please what?" Ellie cooed, her hands drifting to palm at the exposed skin of your ass. "Fuck me, please fuck me," Ellie chuckled and pat your hip.

“Turn around, pretty girl,” You bit your bottom lip and slowly turned your back to Ellie, your hips hovering over hers as you tentatively waited for her next instruction. "Look, you can see yourself in the mirror," Ellie grinned and pointed to the floor-length mirror in the corner of the room that was angled toward the bed. "Raise your hips and keep your eyes on the mirror." Your gaze drifted back to the mirror, one your brother and Ellie had put together for you many summers ago. The sight you saw in the reflection was wrong, it was all plain wrong. Your brother's childhood best friend aligning the tip of the strap with your entrance, your panties pushed to the side, and concentration painting her face. A choked moan escaped your lips as Ellie gently pulled your hips down onto the dildo. You covered your mouth with a shaky hand, a weak attempt at muffling the cries of pleasure that left you. "That's it, yeah, ride me, pretty girl," Ellie guided your hips, her hands splayed out across your ass, two thumbs aligning with the dimples of your lower back. She watched in awe as you began to follow her lead, slowly bouncing on her strap. "Takin' me so good- knew you'd be all ready for my cock," Ellie grunted. You felt her thumbs swipe back and forth against your lower back as she mumbled incoherent praises. "God, you're so sexy...fucking love this tattoo..." Ellie breathed heavily as she stared at the dark ink that painted your skin.

It didn't take long for you to begin moving without her guidance. Your slow movements turned frantic and needy while pleasure burned deep inside of you. You had been fucked with strap-ons before, but it had never felt quite like this. This was more than just meaningless sex. With each buck of your hips, each movement you made, the strap pushed against your g-spot and ever so slightly brushed against your cervix, stimulating all of the most sensitive spots inside of you. "E-Ellie-" You whimpered, reaching a hand behind you. Ellie groaned and quickly intertwined a hand with yours. "Holy fuck," She whispered as she looked over at your reflection in the mirror. Your breasts bounced slightly every time you quickly sunk down onto the toy, and your expression twisted into one of pure ecstasy. Not to mention, the way your ass rippled when the skin slapped against hers made Ellie nearly lose her mind. Everything was too much, and she could hardly decide where to keep her eyes, or her hands for that matter. Her large hands squeezed at the fat of your ass, digging her fingers into your skin. Then she slapped the flesh playfully, just enough for the sting to fade into pleasure.

"I-I'm gonna-" You gasped sharply as you felt a familiar tension growing deep inside you. "Get on your hands and knees. I'll get you there, princess," Ellie murmured. You nodded and did as she said, leaning forward into doggy style. Ellie paused for a moment to realign the strap with your cunt and to grasp at the waistband of your panties. Soon, Ellie began to thrust into you quickly and deeply. She dragged your hips against hers by the band of your underwear, pulling you back and forth on her fake cock like you were some sort of doll for her to use. A loud smack echoed throughout your bedroom when Ellie slapped your ass. You moaned into the fluffy bedsheets you were pressed up against. "My brother- he's gonna hear us-" You whined as you glanced back at Ellie with glassy eyes. "Don't worry about that, pretty girl, he sleeps like the dead." Ellie laughed softly as she plunged deep inside of you. "Oh! There! Right there!" You practically sobbed when she repeated the same movement over and over again until your legs were shaking. On the verge of your orgasm, your body buzzed with pleasure, and tears threatened to spill from your eyes. "Mmh- Els, m'gonna.." "Yeah, cum for me princess, cum all over my cock." She whispered as her thumbs traced the intricate lines of your tattoo and her hips slapped against yours. One of her hands slid around your waist and moved down to begin quickly circling your clit. Ellie was desperate to get you off, she wanted to watch as you lost control of your body and experienced an intense orgasm. That was enough to push you over the edge, you screamed into the bedsheets as you felt your body stiffen and shake against Ellie's. Her thrusts slowed but didn't completely stop, as she wanted to prolong that climax as much as she could. Your senses were clouded with nothing but white-hot pleasure while you rode out the rest of your orgasm. After what felt like a few very long moments, Ellie slowly pulled out of you and sat back on the bed. She undid the straps on her hips and placed the toy on your bedside table. "C'mere, pretty girl..." She cooed softly as she gently picked you up and pulled you into her arms. Ellie lay with you in the bed, her fingers lightly tracing patterns along the skin of your back as she cuddled you. "You did so good, you're so perfect..." She said quietly. You hummed softly in response and closed your eyes. "You better get back to my brother's room, he wouldn't be happy to see you coming out of my room in the morning." "I know, but I'll stay until you fall asleep. Don't worry about me, princess." And for once, you listen to her. You focused on the heat Ellie's body radiated against yours and how peaceful you felt in her loving embrace. It felt right. --- tags: @asteroidzzzn , @ellabsprincess , @ximtiredx

[priyajoyyy]

Rough waters

Literally what is that name?

Clarisse la rue x mermaid!fem!reader

Very certain the perspectives makes sense, but may not.

It switches between what reader and what Clarisse are thinking and doing but is always in readers perspective, if parts are wrong, don’t be afraid to let me know.

Sorry about the ending I think it’s kinda shit.

Warnings:

Mentions of past trauma, protective siblings, eventually protective!Clarisse, poor writing, drowning, cannon typical violence, Clarisse isn’t toxic to reader for once 🥰🤩, implied nudity (the mermaids become human at one point and don’t really have clothing but it’s normal to them, they don’t expect any humans to actually see them and I’m not describing anything), mentions of anxiety and loneliness

Clarisse knew there were plenty of mythical creatures living in the forest and waters surrounding camp halfblood, but she had never realised the lake also habituated mermaids, and especially not pretty ones…

Clarisse hadn’t properly seen all of the creatures in the forest surrounding camp half blood drying her stay, mainly because a lot wouldn’t be very favourable to half bloods invading their space.

But she believed she at least knew of most of the other inhabitants of the camp, Chiron made sure to make all the campers aware of which to avoid and which would be keeping and eye on them and stopping them from misbehaving, so she assumed he wouldn’t miss any out.

It wasn’t till the middle of summer she learnt that mermaids lived in the camp lake, hiding away from the halfbloods and only surfacing when they knew nobody was about.

It had been hot the day she’s first seen them, she noticed someone swimming near the rocks while they were meant to be training.

Clarisses younger sister had gone to the toilet half an hour ago and hadn’t been seen since and she thought that it must be her in the waters, skiving to have fun instead of her punishment for their recent loss in capture the flag.

She stormed over towards the figure, expecting her sister to appear clearer as she got closer, only to realise it wasn’t her sister at all, and this person didn’t appear to have legs.

She watched from afar at first, listening and looking to see if she could approach any further.

She had seen you, laying by the side of the beach, your tail laid in the water while the top half of you lounged in the sun on the rock side.

Your eyes were shut, sun bathing and relaxing while what looked like your brother, sat on the rock to your side, watching over the lot of you.

Your sisters were through the bushes, chatting and dancing around, their tails now gone and replaced with legs, and carrying them through the small area of forest they dared venture in.

She watched you for a while, standing hidden behind the trees, looking at your face which rested on your hands and shifted every-once in a while, watching your tail flicker and flow around in the water.

She wasn’t sure how long she was there, observing and waiting for you to do something, but she was shaken out of her thoughts when she heard your sister shouting your name. Waking you up and telling you that they were all leaving.

“Come on y/n” your brother told you as you woke up, “we’re going back”

“I’ll stay a little longer” you responded in a mumble groggily, resting your head back down on your arms again and turning away from your siblings.

Your sister dived into the water then, swimming back up to the surface to splash you with water, laughing, “come on, you’ve done enough sunbathing for today”

You splashed your tail in the water in response, hitting her with water and causing her to swim backwards and grumble.

“I don’t want to, I’ll leave later” you responded rolling your eyes and then closing them.

“We’re not leaving you out here alone” your brother stated simply, raising his eyebrows at you as you ignored him.

“I’ll be fine, promise” you stated, before pushing yourself up and around to face him in annoyance, “I swear, I’ll be fine, I’m sitting by the water, if anyone comes by I can just swim off”

Clarisse knew then it would be a bad idea to try talk to you. But she couldn’t help but want to, she hadn’t felt this way about anyone before, especially not by just looking at them.

She thought about it, and she wondered if maybe it was because you were a mermaid, like how the Aphrodite girls could make people fall in love with them with their charmspeak, perhaps you had a natural version of that?

She had heard of sirens before, tempting people to their deaths with their voices, making people fall so deeply in love with them they loose their senses.

Perhaps you were one of those. Well perhaps not a siren, while there were some dangerous creatures when provoked in the forest, Chiron would never allow sirens to lure campers to their deaths.

But a mermaid that made people fall in love with them? She supposed that made sense.

Yes, that had to be it, it was the only reason why she felt so compelled to watch you, to have the need to speak, to you to kiss you.

“Honest, I’ll be fine” you reassured again, one of the girls in the water, rolling their eyes and finally swimming off.

“Scream if you need help” the boy said in full seriousness, causing you to laugh at his behaviour.

“Oh stop being so dramatic” your sister spoke laughing, giving you a quick grin and diving into the lake.

“I will” you responded as you turned back around to go back to resting, ignoring your brothers overprotectiveness and letting him swim off.

You knew he had reason to be worried, all of you had a distaste for humans and halfbloods, but he knew you particularly had a big fear of them.

You had good reason to be, humans could be cruel, halfbloods in particular, some of them were bitter and hateful, their parents habits reflecting on children they hardly raised.

You’d experienced this cruelty first hand, and ever since, your siblings had been more protective over you, especially when you ventured to the shores of the lake you lived in.

Of course, not all halfbloods were like this, but it didn’t make you any less cautious, hiding in the hidden parts of the shore and avoiding them like the plague.

The only time you voluntarily spent time near halfbloods was when you were trying to save them. Being the one out of your siblings that tended to save the younger children from drowning the most.

You found when they couldn’t breathe, they were much nicer to be around.

You had calmed down again on your rock, relaxing under the sun on such a nice day, you stayed still there for quite a while before you heard a noise.

Clarisse hadn’t meant to step on anything, infact she was normally quite agile.

She had deciding to leave, realising it was beyond creepy that she had been staring at you in silence for as long as she had and that her siblings would be waiting for her, but stepped on a twig as she took her first step.

You jumped up quickly, turning to look around you in fear, noticing her in the trees, frozen with a pained expression on her face.

You went to jump away, flinching as she turned to face you beginning to apologise.

“W-wait stop, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to do that” Clarisse stuttered out, she didn’t know what was wrong with her, she never stuttered.

“I swear I’m not gonna hurt you…I just saw you in the distance and decided to see who was by the lake during training.

Against your better judgement, you stayed for a moment, watching and listening to her with wide eyes.

Clarisse could tell you were scared, despite the warmth you shook, and your hands clenched together onto one rock.

“I didn’t mean to scare you” Clarisse gently told you, “my names Clarisse…what’s your name?”

“I know what your name is” you mumbled, watching the girl like a hawk.

“You do?”

“You make the children do pushups by the lake” you stated quietly like it was obvious as to why she knew of you.

She looked confused at that, how many things must you have seen and she didn’t even know you were there for.

“You were there last week too” you told her, “you screamed”

Clarisse certainly didn’t need help to work out what the girl meant, everyone in camp had heard her scream, and everyone had been receiving the brunt of her anger since her spear had been broken by the new son of Poseidon.

After a long pause, you finally told her your name, Clarisse could tell you had relaxed a little, inching back to where you had originally sat rather than the edge of the rock as far as you could get from her.

You both chatted for a while, Clarisse with lots of questions and explanations, and you with short answers that slowly got a little longer.

You opened up as the time went on, still cautious but somewhat excited to have a friend that wasn’t one of your brothers or sisters.

Eventually you both decide it was time for you to go, both needing to get back to your siblings waiting on you, but Clarisse, not wanting to never see you again after this point, asked to meet again the next day.

Neither of you told anyone about your daily meet ups, you knew your siblings wouldn’t approve, stopping you from going up to the surface for a long time.

Clarisse knew she’d never tell anyone else, word would reach everyone in camp about a family of mermaids living in the lake in a matter of hours.

She also knew you had a large fear of other people. It was clear something had happened to you, and she had a feeling it had something to do with the camper that washed up to shore last summer.

She’d not gotten specifics from you, she always tried not to push you too far but she was so curious. She just put two and two together. The boy was horrid, rude to girls and she even had a couple of her younger sisters complain to her about him in the past, he wasn’t exactly missed by anyone when they found out he had drowned.

Of course she didn’t think you had done anything to him, not intentionally at least. you didn’t seem like you could even touch a half blood without trying to swim as far as you could.

However after observing your siblings around you for only a few minutes, she got the feeling they could certainly have been apart of it.

She knew she couldn’t let any of them know about you, they’d only hurt you and then all the progress you’d both made on her fear of half bloods would be for nothing.

So they continued to meet up on the daily. Sometimes you would wait until your siblings had left to transform your tail into legs, and meet with Clarisse slightly deeper into the woods.

Other times, she’d meet you by the shore, sneaking away after dinner and before bed, even letting you teach her how to swim.

It was a perfect summer, and it certainly helped Clarisse with dealing with the arrival and quick departure of Percy Jackson. And you with your loneliness and anxiety.

Now you just had to tell your siblings…

Ending is kinda shit but I didn’t know how to end it lol, Let me know if you’d like a part 2!! Feel like I have some more ideas but I have a series in the works so may focus on that instead

Taglist:

@slaggylemon @yourmom-25s-blog

[papercorgiworld]

An unintended double date

Draco and Theo

Enzo doesn’t want you ruining his date so he calls in back up to keep you busy, which leads to an interesting date.

Warning: Draco none, Theo is very suggestive

Today’s little cameo is Noemi ( @njutul ). She’s a new student and you’re a bit protective of her. Enzo asks her on a date, which ends up being an unintended double date.

Sorry, the intro is a bit longer than necessary, but I love writing Enzo being a love struck idiot. Also, sorry I’m in the mood for short little silly stories so that’s what you’re getting… I have two more to finish and then I’m focusing requests. Anyways, as you know feedback is always welcome, but most importantly happy reading!

You had been assigned with the task to show the new student from Italy around, after that Noemi and you quickly became friends. Now after two weeks the Hufflepuff was settled and seemed to know the castle even better than you. However, your biggest worry wasn’t that she would get lost in the castle, rather that she would get lost in Enzo’s starry eyes. The slytherin had fallen for the new girl at day one and had been an absolute menace to you, regularly interrupting you when you toured Noemi around the castle.

And today was the day he was finally going to make his big move. Filled with confidence he struts over to Noemi after class. “Ciao bella-”Enzo starts with a forced Italian accent, but immediately goes back to English seeing how Noemi looks utterly confused. “So I was thinking- wanna go for a swim later?” Enzo curses himself for getting flustered, when he normally was so confident.

“Sounds lovely, can (y/n) join? She was talking about swimming just the other day.” Aah no! It’s supposed to be me and you in the water, close together, without (y/n) swimming around! “Sure, sweet, perfect.” Enzo forces a smile and Noemi calls you over from across the hall. “Let’s join Enzo and his friends for a swim later?” Noemi asks with sparkling eyes and you look at Enzo who’s begging you with his eyes to say no. “Sure, sounds fun.” You say and grin at Enzo.

***

A frustrated Lorenzo enters the Slytherin common room. “(Y/n) is joining in on my date with the most gorgeous girl at Hogwarts.” Draco and Blaise start laughing at Enzo’s dramatics and his failed attempt at a date. “Romantic.” Draco snickers. “How can you be so in love with Noemi? She’s only been here for two weeks?” Theodore asks dryly. “It’s because she’s Italian.” Blaise explains with a serious voice.

“I’m Italian! None of you are jumping my bones.” Theodore argues being difficult, but just then Mattheo enters the common room. “I would jump you, Theo.” Mattheo jokes, not knowing what the conversation is about and making his way to his room. Blaise snickers, explaining the situation to Mattheo as he passes by. “Enzo is in loooovvee with the new Italian girl, he asked her on a swimming date.” Mattheo stops in his tracks and looks at Enzo. “Better not screw it up, Berkshire, or I’m asking her out tomorrow.” A confident smirk tugs on Mattheo’s lips as he grins at Enzo before entering his room

“Merlin!” Enzo groans, realizing he has competition. “This date needs to be perfect.”

Draco

“Draco, you’re going to entertain (y/n) so I can make Noemi fall in love with me.” Draco snorts and wants to protest, but Enzo throws him a dangerous death glare and Draco just nods. “Right, I’ll… entertain (y/n).”

***

On your way to the lake Enzo and Noemi are walking in front of you and Draco. When Enzo shamelessly slings his arm around her you want to intervene, but as soon as you take a quick step forward Draco grabs your hand, pulling you back to him. “Please chill, he’s just being casual Enzo and the girl can make up her own mind.” You stop walking when Draco doesn’t let go of your hand. “Yeah, but she doesn’t know that, just like you, Enzo comes with a warning label.” Draco snorts and pulls you a little closer. “And what does the warning say, too hot to handle.” You roll your eyes. “You wish.” You move away trying to hide the little blush creeping up on your cheeks, but Draco still doesn’t let go of your hand and laces his fingers with yours. You stare at your entangled hands with a questioning look. “I have orders to keep you at bay.” You throw your head to the side out of annoyance and he just smirks. He was really enjoying this, glad to finally have an excuse to literally keep you close.

You watch Enzo playfully drag Noemi to the water and cross your arms. Draco’s hands reach for your shoulders kneading them softly. “You need to chill. You’re like a worried mom or something.” You raise your eyebrows and ignore him, but Draco doesn’t mind your lack of response as he slowly reaches for the zipper of your dress. “Let’s relax in the water, shall we?” With one swift move he unzips your dress, making you yelp. When you turn around, he’s playfully grinning at your baffled smile. You narrow your eyes, but let your dress slide down to reveal your bikini. Now you get to see his smile fade as he gawks at your figure. You smirk at how simple he can be, not being able to keep his eyes off of you. When you turn around heading for the water he’s still staring, focusing on how your ass moves with every step you take. “You're gonna just stand there, Malfoy?” He forces a smile as he curses himself for simping.

Once in the water, you cast a spell to get it to the perfect temperature and allow yourself to relax. “Look at that you’re not stressing for once.” Draco jokes and you glare at him. “I can be fun.” You argue, but just then you spot Enzo and Noemi in the distance. “He’s so preying on her.” Draco rolls his eyes and pulls you closer. “He’s not preying on her, he’s flirting and I think she doesn’t mind.” You look at Noemi laughing as Enzo playfully pulls her against his chest. “And you should be glad it’s Enzo, apparently Matt was planning on asking her out as well.” You turn your gaze back to Draco with a slight panic in your eyes. “Okay, now I hope Enzo marries her.” Draco laughs and you let the hand he’s once again holding, rest against his chest. “We’re not all bad you know.” Draco whispers sincerely with his hand on yours and you realize that maybe you were in the wrong. “I guess I sometimes get a little caught up in the gossip about you guys.” You let yourself drown in his eyes for a moment, which doesn’t go unnoticed.

“I think you’re warming up to me.” He wiggles his eyebrows and you blush at his words. When he notices this, he closes the distance between you two. “No Malfoy, that’s just the warm water.” He nods with a bright smile at your incredibly lame excuse. “The gossip about you being incredibly full of yourself is still true.” You joke, but can’t help enjoying being this close to him. When you don’t move away from him, he feels confident enough to snake an arm around your waist. Now you were way past warming up, you were heating up. “I think you like me.” Draco sings and you instantly protest. “No, I-” You shake your head, creating a little distance between you two, but he won’t allow it and immediately pulls you against his chest again. “I think if I would kiss you right now, you would let me.”

He makes a soft sound out of amusement and curiosity as he leans in and you don’t move away. Were you really about to kiss Malfoy? Hermoine is going to kill me. When his lips brush yours you lean in for a kiss, startling him with your eagerness, but he had been dreaming of this moment for too long to let it pass by. His hand reaches for your head keeping you close as he kisses you tenderly. You feel your whole body melt into his as he goes from a grinning moron to a passionate lover. These slytherins really should come with a warning label.

Theodore

“Theo, you’re going to entertain (y/n) so I can make Noemi fall in love with me.” Theodore frowns, but Enzo stares at him with a stern look. “Fine. I’ll keep (y/n) busy.”

***

Maybe not the worst thing I’ve had to do for a friend. Theodore stares at you as you wiggle down your dress, but you don’t notice him as you are too busy worrying about Enzo’s advances on the innocent hufflepuff. You groan and narrow your eyes at Enzo as he plays with Noemi’s honey brown hair. “Unbelievable.” You mutter, stepping out of your dress, ready to intervene as Enzo’s about to pull the classic sunscreen move. However, Theodore doesn’t allow you to get very far as he shamelessly wraps his arms around your waist and pulls your back against his chest. His lips brush your ear. “Okay, little miss I’m on a mission, I can’t let you ruin their date.” You huff trying to wiggle your way out of Theo’s arms, but unintentionally only making it more enjoyable for him. “Careful there, you might give a guy the wrong idea if you squirm against him like that.”

At his words your face heats up. Is this man incapable of not talking dirty for one moment? “I bet you’re on a mission as well? Enzo asked you to watch me, didn’t he?” You ask with a stern voice and he lets you go. You turn to face him and there’s an amused grin on his face that tells you your assumption was spot on. “Enzo, that sneaky bastard.” With determination you try and walk past Theo, but honestly you had zero chance as he simply grabs you and lifts you up. “Theo!” You scream as you notice he’s walking you to the water. “You can just throw me in! I need to slowly adjust to the temperature.” Theodore stops a few steps away from the water and lets you land on your feet. He smirks with suggestive eyes. “You’re one of those girls, hm.” He teases and you frown. “What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask, crossing your arms and unintentionally pressing your boobs together, giving Theo an even better view. He licks his lips and ogles between your breasts and your eyes until you look down and drop your arms.

He takes a slow step towards you with teasing eyes. “What I meant was that you’re one of those girls who needs time to adjust and gets all whiny when it’s too much to handle.” You place your hands on his chest to keep him at a distance. “I think it’s fair to assume you’re not talking about the water anymore.” Your voice is unamused, but Theodore knows you’re enjoying his little teasing game. “Are we still getting in the water today? Or are you already wet enough?” Your mouth drops at his blunt filthy talk. “This is exactly why I think guys like you need a warning label.” You say taking a step towards him in an attempt to come off as intimidating, but Theodore just raises his eyebrows in amusement. “A warning label?” Theodore questions, leaning in with his eyes focused on yours.

”Ye-yes, you-you’re trouble.” You stammer feeling your legs get weak under his piercing gaze. His eyes move to your lips. “Oh, I’m much more than just trouble, trust me.” His voice is low and seductive. You notice how his eyes stick to your lips as his tongue slowly moves over his lips. “Don’t you dare kiss me.” You breathe out sounding not the least bit convincing. A smug smile tugs on his lips and he lets his hands rest on your hips, allowing his thumbs to draw small circles just above your waistband. “What are you afraid of?” He whispers and brushes his nose against yours. That’ll become even more desperate for you than I already am or worse that you’ll figure out how in love I am… if you haven’t already. You open your mouth in hopes that you can come up with a good response, but just then Theodore takes a step closing the distance between you two, causing a soft whimper to leave your lips at the feeling of his body pressed against yours.

Embarrassed by the sound you just made and flustered by his closeness you look away from him, but Theodore doesn’t allow it and reaches for your chin. It’s then that you notice something has changed in his eyes. Looks pretty, sounds pretty and a little bit annoying… to Theo you were irresistible. His hand moves from your chin to cup your cheek and within seconds his hungry lips are on yours. He softly grunts and his large hands grip your ass, lifting you up and allowing you to feel his hard member through swim shorts. He walks you to the water, so your make out session is at least partly private.

[runningfrom2am]

cold nights // part nineteen

summary: you showed him colours he knows he can't see with anyone else.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 3.3k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: tribute!reader and mentor!coriolanus, r is very sweet (too kind for this world. literally.), sunshine x grumpy trope kinda, he falls first, violence typical for the source material, depictions of mental illness, also she's is very smart (as she should), district twelve!reader.

a/n: i'm sorry it took me so long to post this omg i am behind on writing bc i'm so sick but i'm also trying to get ahead on requiem BUT-

Important Announcement!!:

cold nights will officially have a season 3! i wasn't sure but i had a good idea for what the epilogue would be and then i realized it would be so much better as another fully developed idea. so, that will be coming soon!!

my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)

send me any and all of your thoughts! here!

series masterlist // playlist

Coryo smiles as you run up ahead of him, picking up his pace slightly and dropping his bag next to yours.

Some of the others are already stripped down to their bathing suits and running down the dock. It is beautiful here, not that he ever doubted you.

He watches as you peel off your dress, another short one similar to the one you had worn for most of the time he'd known you. This one wasn't sewn in at the middle, so you can slip it quickly over your head. Your bathing suit must have been homemade, too, and it allowed him to see how the bruises and scratches on your back were all but healed while you toss your dress to the ground. He notices quickly that it was exactly the same as Lucy Gray's, maybe your mother had made you matching ones. That's so sweet.

Your skin looked so beautifully soft- just like it should have the first time he saw it, spare for the scars on your calf and your arm, it was just what he imagined.

You kick your shoes off, and the wood of the dock is hot against your bare feet as you run down to the end, diving head-first off to the side to avoid jumping right onto any of your friends.

It seemed to Coryo that you weren't afraid anymore as you briefly looked back at him while you were running. The excited scream you let out when you lept from the dock made his heart flutter. This is exactly what he had wanted, from the very beginning.

When Coryo jumps in behind you, you can hear his shout and feel the water shift around you as his body breaks the surface. You turn under the water, its clarity allowing you to see where everyone is. You loved this. The memories of this lake kept you safe, almost. You can hear muffled laughter above the water, deciding to take your time before coming up for air. You didn't need it just yet.

You swim away from everyone deep under the surface, scanning the lake floor for anything interesting. Really, it was just sticks and rocks and mud, but one day you may find something else exciting, but not today.

"Where is she going?" Coryo comments, watching your body as you kick away deeper under the water.

"Wherever she wants." Lennox answers plainly, treading water as he stares at him.

"She's looking for secrets." Maude Ivory giggles, splashing him in the face. At least she gave him somewhat of an answer.

He quickly lifts an arm to block the wave, but it fails miserably. "What kind of secrets will she find at the bottom of the lake?" He coughs out, wiping the water from his eyes.

"Once we found a watch." Lucy Gray shrugs, looking from him to you. "Which is odd because we didn't know anyone else knew about this place. The secrets are what happens when we aren't here."

You hardly noticed the lack of oxygen until it almost felt too late, quickly swimming up and pushing your hair out of your face so you don't inhale it by mistake.

"Anything good today?" Lucy Gray shouts over to you as soon as she's noticed you've come up.

"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so!" You pant, pushing yourself through the water back toward her.

"So, that's a no?" Sejanus asks and you laugh, shaking your head.

"Just rocks and sticks." You explain, joining them again and bumping shoulders with Lucy Gray. "Some weeds, if that's your fancy."

"Oh, yes, that's right up my alley." Sejanus chuckles, cupping his hands to block out the glare of the sun as he looks down into the water anyway.

"I've never been to a lake before," Coryo says, breathing heavily as the waves from the kids splashing keep coming up too close to his face.

"What? Really?" Lucy Gray and Sejanus ask in unison, and you smile at him.

He nods, eyes locking with yours. You feel the need to say something. "Is it everything you dreamt of?" You ask.

"Just about." He grins.

"Oh? What's missing?" You giggle.

Oh, only being able to hold you without retraumatizing you.

"It's not that anything is missing," He comes up with as an excuse. "There's just more birds than I expected."

"Oh, yeah. They like it out here." You hum, looking up at the trees while Lucy Gray whistles out a tune for them to mimic. You smile. "Why, you don't like birds either?"

"Never been the biggest fan, no." He chuckles.

The birds echo her song back to you repeatedly. Coryo turns around to watch as if there was anything to see besides these black birds flitting around the trees and above the cabin. "What kind of birds are they?" He asks. "I've never seen that before."

"We call 'em Mockingjays." Lucy Gray tells him.

"'Cause they'll mock ya if you mess up the song!" Clerk Carmine jumps in, climbing onto Lucy Gray's back under the water.

"Oh, I wouldn't know." Your friend teases him, gripping tight onto the boy's legs as he starts to shout. He knows what's about to happen, and clearly you do too as Coryo watches you and your brother quickly swim out of their reach and closer to him.

You laugh, watching as Lucy Gray takes a big dramatic breath in and sinks under the surface of the water, pulling CC down with her as he screams and splashes.

The sun dried you quickly after you decided you had had enough of the water, climbing back out onto the dock and deciding to just lay your blanket there to dry off on while you took the book and snacks from your bag.

Coryo had been sitting with Lucy Gray and Sejanus, but they were just talking to each other more than him. Not that he could have paid much attention. He was just watching you.

"Can I go talk to her?" He asks with little regard for the conversation that he was interrupting.

They both look over at him. "I mean, you could try. Would that be okay?" Sejanus answers, looking to Lucy Gray for confirmation.

"No. Let her have her peace and quiet." Lennox interrupts as he walks back up in front of them, pulling his shirt back onto his now fully dried skin.

Lucy Gray sighs."Just... Don't be stupid." She advises Coryo, nodding him on. "Len, we'll be right here."

Your brother shakes his head slightly, glaring between the three of them with nothing short of adamant disapproval.

Coryo nods slightly, taking the preferable answer by getting up and heading back down onto the dock.

Lennox looks back over his shoulder to where he just was with Maude Ivory looking for katniss, before taking Coryo's spot on the deck.

"Did she not tell you anything about him?" Lennox mumbles to Lucy Gray, eyes locked on his sister and her 'friend' as he stands over her. "No, she must have- because you were at The Hob last week. You saw it."

"I saw a girl with a lot of unresolved trauma have an episode." Lucy Gray explains, watching Lennox take Coryo's spot next to her. "He made a mistake, but he wouldn't ever hurt her."

Your brother opens his mouth to argue, but Sejanus interrupts. "I know it isn't my place, but Lucy Gray is right. He would sooner die than hurt her."

"Okay, well, explain how he's sitting right next to her when he's already hurt her so bad she may never recover!" Lennox whispers, gesturing to the dock as if they couldn't already see you there.

"I'm not defending anything he's done. That's not what I meant." Sejanus explains. "I just mean he would never do it on purpose."

"Accidents are clearly bad enough."

"Len, he just wants to make amends now." Lucy Gray insists. "And she wants that. I know she does, she's really trying."

"Listen, if it helps..." Sejanus starts, looking back out at you and Coryo on the dock. He can tell how nervous his friend is, watching you intently as he picks at the wood finish beneath him and listening to you talk. "He really loves her. I know it's not my place to tell you that, but it was bad when she was gone. He hardly spoke a word to anyone, he wouldn't put her book down- it was really hard on him. We weren't sure if she had been executed for cheating, and it was killing him to be left in the dark."

"That's not love, that's guilt." Lennox mutters, watching you closely.

"What's the difference between love and guilt?" Lucy Gray asks him rhetorically. "He wouldn't feel guilty if he didn't care."

"The difference is he wouldn't have come here and made the same mistake again."

Lucy Gray bites into her lip, slightly shaking her head. That was an honestly good point.

"I was in the arena, too. I saw what he did." Sejanus says after a moment. "He saved my life, it was my fault. It was shocking... you know, the overkill, but I can't say for certain I wouldn't have done the same thing. We were both pumped so full of adrenaline that I truly believe that's what it was." He explains. "I mean, I was behind him, so I don't know what she saw- but it looked like adrenaline to me."

"How do you think she felt?" Lennox asks, eyes wide. "She was in there for three days! You and him were there for what, ten minutes?"

"Wait..." Lucy Gray backpedals, looking at Sejanus. "Sejanus, what do you mean you thought he was executed for cheating? Like, in the games?"

Sejanus swallows, nodding. He looks over at you but quickly looks away. "Yeah, uh... Coryo told me that she used rat poison to kill two of the others. And he did something to keep the snakes from biting her, but I don't think he was caught for that."

Your brother and best friend look at each other like they'd just seen a ghost before their eyes simultaneously track to you. You were laughing.

"She didn't... She didn't tell me that." Lucy Gray says quietly. "Did you know, Len?"

"No."

"That doesn't surprise me." Sejanus shrugs and they both look at him, shocked and confused. "Well, she doesn't know either. I don't think, definitely not about the snakes, but she told the Dean it was salt. That I gave her." He laughs slightly at the end, but they don't find it funny. "By the time she left, she was fully delusional about it. She knew what it was, Coryo gave it to her to protect herself because he needed her to win. She was really upset by the insinuation that it, in fact, was not salt."

Lucy Gray and Lennox look at each other again, unsure what to say. It must have been worse than they thought. Regardless, they knew it must be eating you alive.

"Can I join you?" You hear Coryo's voice above you after about ten minutes of listening to the mockingjays sing Lucy Gray's song back to her as she sat on the porch of the cabin. The sun was so warm on your skin that you could have fallen asleep here if you weren't reading your book.

You squint against the sun as you look up at him. "Yes, you may." You agree, and you feel him sitting down next to you as the wood creaks below him.

You find yourself holding your breath, even as you return to your book to try and remain relaxed.

He's not going to hurt you.

"What are you reading?" He asks after a moment, thinking your arms must be asleep for using them to hold the book and support your weight for so long.

"It's called 'Much Ado About Nothing'." You answer. "Another Shakespeare piece."

"Do you like it?" He asks, lifting his leg to rest his elbow on his knee while you sit up, crossing your legs and letting the book fall into your lap.

"I do." You smile down at the page. It is much more lighthearted than Romeo and Juliet, as much as you would have loved to come home and drown yourself in your favourite book- the boy next to you unintentionally made it impossible. God, you were so embarrassed by the letter you wrote to him. Your cheeks flush just think about it. All you did by surviving was make everything weird.

"Another tragedy?" He inquires, attempting to read some of the words on the page as it's opened on your lap.

"No." You chuckle, shaking your head. "It's a romantic comedy, actually."

"Oh, wow. You changed it up?" He asks, only somewhat shocked. It would only make sense that you couldn't handle much more tragedy since you've been home.

"I did." You smile. "It's quite funny."

"Will you read me your favourite part?" He suggests, watching your eyes as they light up with excitement from the request.

"Okay, so..." You quickly flip back through the pages and into the first act, scanning for the lines you're looking for. "Okay. Here." You pretend to clear your throat.

"In our last conflict four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one: so that if he have wit enough to keep himself warm, let him bear it for a difference between himself and his horse; for it is all the wealth that he hath left, to be known a reasonable creature." You recite, dragging your finger along the page so he can track what you are reading. You remembered it, but it might have been easier for him to follow that way.

Coryo watched you the whole time, and by the end, you were a giggling mess. You thought it was absolutely hilarious, and he smiles at that.

"What does that mean?" He chuckles.

"So," You laugh, a hand pressed to your chest. "Basically, she's talking about how she was arguing with Benedick and won. The punchline is that she let him keep one of his wits, because if she didn't no one would be able to tell him from his horse."

Coryo laughs at that, shaking his head. "That is good." He agrees.

"Isn't it?" You smile. "It's a welcome change of pace."

"Yeah, Romeo and Juliet was... yikes." He says, ticking his jaw and peeling up some of the wood from the dock between you.

"You read it?" You ask quietly, eyes widening as you look over at him. It shouldn't shock you, he told you he would, and that he even looked forward to it. "What did you think?"

"Of course I did," Coryo nods. "I really enjoyed it."

"It doesn't seem like it..." You laugh nervously, looking down as you flip back to the page you were on before closing the book.

"No, truly. I did." He insists. "Just... for lack of a better term, it was tragic."

"Yes, well..." You chuckle, shrugging slightly and tucking your book back into the bag next to you.

"It was heartbreaking!" He laughs suddenly. "And that's your favourite?" He looks at you then, head tilted as he slightly shakes his head.

"Okay, so," You laugh, rolling your eyes. You were used to defending this to others who have tried reading it. "That's what makes it so beautiful. It's so touching, they died for each other thinking they were in love, but they also hardly knew each other. It forces you to wonder what could have been, and I like that."

"Okay, well, you're right." Coryo agrees. "I didn't like the ending, but that's the point, I suppose. The rest was good, it reminded me a lot of you."

"I think I forced a bias onto you. My apologies."

"You didn't force anything on me." He smiles, shaking his head. "All I knew is that you loved it, and that made it so much better."

Your cheeks flush as you busy yourself by pulling out the bag of cherries. "Would you like some?" You offer the bag to him and he reaches in, taking just a couple out and popping one into his mouth.

"I finished it all before you left." Coryo tells you, and you hold him out another empty paper bag to spit the pits into.

"That good?" You smile and he nods.

"Can I..." Coryo starts, and you tilt your head at him. He doesn't want to ruin your day by bringing this up. Everything on your face shows hope, even excitement for what he is going to say. "If you can't hear this stop me, but the book made great company in the mentor hall."

For a moment, he saw nervousness flicker behind your eyes, but still, you nodded. You wanted to hear anything he had to say- you just hoped you could stomach it.

"Oh, that's fine. I'm... I'm glad." You try and smile, distracting yourself by popping a cherry into your mouth.

"I was alone most of the time. I didn't go home." He tells you, trying to say what he wanted but still be as vague as possible.

"It must have been so horribly boring." You laugh nervously, swallowing the cherry pit as you reach for another of the small red fruits, picking the stem from it and flicking it into the lake.

"I wish it was." He replies, watching you closely to see if and when he's crossed a line. You nod in understanding, and he takes a nervous breath in. "I... The alternative was that I got sent home like some of my classmates. I wasn't going to leave until I had to."

'Until I had to.'

So he was forced to go in for Sejanus. Why on earth would they not send peacekeepers? Why another child?

"I... I appreciate that." You stammer out, looking down at your lap, noticing for the first time that your hands were trembling. "That must have been uncomfortable. I apologize."

Coryo furrows his brow at you. "No, I'm sorry. Why would you apologize to me?" He asks. "I'm sorry I couldn't do more for you. That I couldn't get you out."

"You did more than you had to." You say, voice quiet with your honesty.

"No." He shakes his head. "I had to do everything I did. I couldn't let you die."

"You saved my life, and... and-" It happens very suddenly when a tear falls down your cheek; you didn't even notice you were starting to panic.

"No, wait, I'm sorry, hey, don't cry..." Coryo says quickly. He wants to help, to do something, but he feels helpless. Again. He feels sick with the knowledge that he always says the wrong thing.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." You mumble, trying to wipe your eyes but you're finding it hard to speak.

"Don't be, please don't be sorry." He pleads with you, shifting so he's kneeling next to you, placing a hand on your back.

You almost jump away, head flying to look at him. He's just rubbing your back. He's only trying to help.

Instinctively, your eyes search for his. They aren't hard to find, and all you can see as you search them is worry. Nothing malicious. "I... Do you want me to get Lucy Gray? Or your brother?" He offers, grabbing your shaking hands in his free one. "Just take deep breaths."

You nod, scared to look away for even a second. So he has to.

Coryo turns back, swallowing his pride. "Lennox! Lucy Gray!" He shouts, drawing their attention quickly.

He accepted the berating he was about to get from your brother before it even came.

"What did you do?" Lennox asks him, forcing himself between the two of you.

"We were just talking and I think I said something- I don't know, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..." Coryo answers honestly, standing up and taking a step back.

You're watching him, intently, despite Lucy Gray taking over holding you and talking to you in hushed tones, trying to ease your mind.

"I'm okay." You tell her, nodding. You don't look at her, only watching him. Watching his eyes- but nothing changes. Baby blue. Worry. More worry.

taglist: @soulessjourney , @that-veela-girl ,  @dreamyysouls, @rockstarbfs , @maysileeewrites , @baybieruth , @kitscutie ,  @fratboyharrysgf0201 , @totallynotkaibiased , @stelleduarte , @secretsicanthideanymore , @bejeweledreverie , @drewsandsebastianswife , @niicole-87 , @queenofshinigamis , @innercreationflower , @nallasstuff , @iovemoonyy , @thatmarvelchick19 , @wearemadeofstardust0 , @regulusblackcore , @puredreamagination , @fantasticchaosthing , @becauseseaotters , @secretsicanthideanymore

okay suddenly tumblr isn't letting me tag more people than this so i just made some cuts unfortunately :') i just left the max amount of people i could whose users i recognized and see in my notifs all the time :) if you're not on here and you should be i'm so sorry!

also this taglist is closed now!! if you’d like to get a notification when i update, turn on my post notifications!! i promise i won’t spam y'all :,)

[lfghughes]

Seal My Fate | Trevor & Jack

a/n: we all know i love myself a love triangle especially a trevor one

Summer was your favorite time of the year and yes Jack was a huge part of that. Every summer Jack and his family spent it at their lake house so you spent a lot of summers there with the boys. Last summer it was a little different because Jack had brought some of his hockey friends with him and that was when you had first met Trevor. You had heard of him plenty in conversation through Jack previous summers but you finally got to meet the person Jack spoke so highly of.

Only downside every summer was the fact Jack had a girlfriend each and every summer which meant your crush was a silent one. Trevor coming last summer actually ended up being great because he was fun and his flirting did not go right over your head. So who knew how this summer would go with him. Jack had texted you, letting you know that they had gotten in the night before and that if you wanted to come over later to eat.

Even if you did have plans you would definitely clear them for this. As soon as you walked in Jack made his way to you, hugging you and lifting you up so he could spin you. “It’s my favorite lake girl.” Jack laughed but meanwhile your heart was soaring from his words. You had to remind yourself that more than likely he was still with the same girlfriend from last year. “Hey, is it true that you were Jacks first kiss?” This time it was Cole who had asked you the question, you also recognized him from the past year.

At the question your cheeks blazed red “I mean we were probably six.” This had been a running joke in the Hughes family for years growing up. Aside from that one blazing question, it was easy to blend in with all the boys. But all you hoped for was a few minutes alone with Jack, that crush on him was still very much alive. So you couldn’t help but notice when he abruptly got up and disappeared into the house while on his phone. “Ex girlfriend problems.” Trevor rolled his eyes as he watched his best friend go into the house.

“Oh?” You asked, not wanting to seem too nosy but you were definitely being nosy. “They broke up a few weeks ago and almost every other night they argue on the phone.” Your heart still sank a little bit because yes he was single but clearly there was still something there. The rest of the night went by smoothly and reluctantly you returned back to your place which was just next door but felt miles away from where you wanted to be. It was pretty late when you heard the sound of something hitting against your window.

Going to your window you looked out, seeing Trevor with a pile of pebbles in his hand. A laugh left your lips as you made your way outside. “It’s kinda late, don’t you think?” You asked and he just shrugged. “Lets go for a swim at the lake?” He nodded his head back towards the water and you nodded your head. “Let me go change into a swimsuit.” You pointed back into your place and a smirk grew on his lips. “I have a better idea. What if we skinny dip? I promise to look away until you get in the water.”

The idea was tempting as nervous as you were and so you cautiously nodded your head, following him to the lake water. He turned his body, giving you time to take your clothes off and dip into the water before he did the same and slipped into the water with you. He swam around, splashing some water at you playfully. “So you planning on a part two with Jack?” He asked and you knew he was referring to the kiss. Your cheeks were burning hot and you were sure if there was enough light outside that he would be able to see how red you were.

“No but even if I was, are you jealous or something?” You asked, playfully teasing him. “No, I was just going to say if you did then we should kiss too. See who is the better kisser.” Again he shrugged, amused by the little game he was wanting to play. “Or we could just kiss either way.” This time you were the one being bold and you saw the look that flashed across his face as he pulled you into him. You weren’t even thinking about the lack of clothes, instead you were focused on the way his thumb brushed against your lower lip before he leaned in and kissed you.

His lips moved against yours in an urgent manner that was also somehow gentle. His hands were everywhere but also gentle against your skin. His hands moved to your hips, his fingers digging into the skin just slightly. “Can I spend the night at your place?” He asked and you just nodded your head because you did not want this to end, not at all.

The rest of the night went exactly how you expected it to and every single bit of it was perfect. When you woke up in the morning, Trevor was still fast asleep and shirtless in your bed. He couldn’t look any more perfect as he laid there and you figured you would sneak out of bed to get some coffee going for you. You nearly jumped out of your skin when you heard the soft knock on the backdoor. When you opened it, Jack was on the other side a smile and a coffee in his hand that came from the local coffee shop.

“I got you some coffee but remember how we used to swim around in the lake every morning when we were kids? I figured we could do that this morning.” You figured it would be hours before Trevor would wake up anyways so you nodded your head. “Let me grab my swim suit.” At your words he came to step in the house and you quickly panicked. “I’ll be right back, just wait out here.”

Of course that sounded weird but Jack didn’t seem to notice too much. You went and grabbed your swimsuit, Trevor still sleeping deeply in your bed. You grabbed a piece of paper and wrote down that you were going for a swim before you exited. “Alright, ready to go?” He asked and before you could even answer, his hands went around your hips as he lifted you up and tossed you over his shoulder, dragging you out to the lake. You had missed Jack and you were so happy to have all summer with him but you were also now excited to spend your summer with Trevor too and who knew maybe you would get a part two with that kiss with Jack too.

[sentientgolfball]

Hello! Can I request a Phantom x Reader where reader is heavily tattooed? Like from her fingers to her feet, but it's typically hidden by her uniform and dress glove, and Phantom finds out. Can be Sfw or Nsfw, which you feel like writing! Thank you!

All of you are personally responsible for my Phantom brainrot only getting worse <3 I hope you enjoy it anon

Went nsfw for this one cause why the hell not sooooo

18+ MDNI

My requests are open !

Your head shot up at the sound of multiple voices getting louder and louder. You immediately noticed a gaggle of ghouls making their way to the dock, arms full of various beach day supplies and copious amounts of alcohol. You grumbled and sunk below the surface, letting the water envelope you in its cool embrace. It has been extraordinarily hot for the past two weeks and you were over it. The Ministry was so stuffy with all the bodies and the habits weren’t exactly made out of the most breathable material. The only people who seemed even remotely comfortable were the fire ghouls who resided on site. 

You were sick of it. Everyday you woke up and prayed to the Lords below that it would be cooler, or at least let a breeze pass through, and everyday it seemed to only get hotter. You had reached your limit. You worked yourself half to death over the weekend and early into the week so that you could squeeze in a day off or two to go be lazy at the lake. And that’s exactly what you were doing, or it was. You resurfaced when you felt your lungs start to burn with lack of oxygen and began to swim back to the beach. You were a bit annoyed about the fact that your lazy day got interrupted. It’s not that you didn’t like the ghouls per say but they were very energetic and very loud and you had really been enjoying quietly floating around. 

Oh well. 

You had been at the lake for hours now so you can’t complain too much. When you got to the shallows you stood and walked the rest of the way to where your stuff was set up and the moment you did you heard the calls from the ghouls. You weren’t all that surprised. You had worn a swimsuit that left little to the imagination. You always did when you went to the lake, it was just about your only chance to really show off the ink that adorned every inch of your body. You were proud of them. You hated that your everyday habit covered up almost all of them. 

You ignored the ghouls while you packed up your things and dried off. When you were finished you wrapped your towel around your waist forgoing the clothes you brought to put on. It was still too damn hot. As you turned to leave you made eye contact with one of the ghouls at the dock and immediately recognized him as the new quintessence ghoul. Phantom. Oh the look on his face was priceless. He was completely frozen in place staring at you as you walked past, slack jawed, eyes roaming over your body. His cheeks were dusted a deep plum color and you would bet money that it’s not from the heat. You felt a surge of confidence, suddenly completely forgetting about your earlier annoyance. You gave him a little wave before you completely passed the dock on your trek back to the Ministry. Just before you were out of earshot you heard the teasing voices of Dew and Rain. 

“Aww the new kids got a crush on the sister.”

“I mean can you blame him? You’ve seen how that back tat looks when she—“ 

The thought was quickly cut off by a yelp and a splash. You laughed at the mental image of Phantom shoving the little fire ghoul into the water. You also couldn’t help your own blush creeping onto your face. You thought the quintessence ghoul was very cute. He was always so eager to help and learn about human things. He constantly looked like a puppy seeing a Christmas tree for the first time and it made you smile. You also really wanted to wreck him. Something about the thought of getting a ghoul to beg and cry as a human turned you on. You pocketed that thought for later, though, because right now your focus was on finding a way to spend your day off not dying in a pool of your own sweat. Maybe the kitchen staff would let you read in the walk in? 

~~~

You ended up taking a nice long shower to wash the lake smell away and binge watched a series a friend had recommended to you for the remainder of your day. You groaned when you heard the bells chime signaling that dinner was ready in the feast hall. You had begrudgingly pulled your habit and gloves back on. You didn’t hate your position as an occultist-in-training but the uniform was a bit much in your opinion, especially compared to other Sibling’s outfits. You sighed, adjusted yourself one final time in the mirror and left. 

That’s where you are now. Sitting in the hall trying your hardest to focus on whatever gossip your friends were sharing, but that was almost impossible with the feeling of Phantom burning holes into the back of your head. You noticed him staring the minute you entered the feast hall and he hasn’t looked away since. You considered walking over to him, trying to speak with him, but you didn’t want to seem too forward. Then you contemplated returning his gaze, but you know your group would’ve clocked what you were doing immediately and you were not in the mood to entertain an interrogation. So you sat there quietly wolfing down your meal so you could get the hell out and back to your room. 

You waited for a lull in the conversation before standing and leaving, bidding everyone a good night. You walked down the hallways a few feet before glancing around to make sure no Clergy or higher Siblings were around before ripping your gloves. It was still too damn hot to be wearing your full uniform. 

“So it is you.” 

You jump at the sound of a voice. You spin around only to find Phantom standing right behind you. 

“Where the hell did you come from?” 

“I think you answered your own question.” 

You crack a smile at his joke before moving to put the gloves back on. He grabs your wrist. 

“Don’t. I like them” he brushes his thumb over the design of the raised skin “I think they’re pretty.” 

“Is that why you were staring all night?” You tease knowing damn well none of your tattoos are visible in uniform. He blushed and when he speaks his voice is a bit higher. 

“Well no I mean yes I was just…confused? You smelled the same but you looked completely different. I wasn’t sure if I had the right person.” 

His explanation gives you the perfect idea to end your little lazy day. 

“Do you wanna see them again?” you step closer to him “all of them?” 

It’s adorable how quickly he nods his head, tail wagging in the air behind him. 

You really have no idea how it happens. You close the door to your room and he’s immediately on you, though not in the way you expected. He’s squeezing you tight against him, wrapping his tail around your leg, but you don’t miss the way the spade sways dangerously close to your clothed clit. Or the way you can feel his dick getting chubby with interest. You’ve been with ghouls before. You know he can smell your arousal. Hell, he’s a quintessence ghoul he can probably feel it. You assume he’s just trying to draw out the electric energy of anticipation. He laughs and you get your answer.

 You decide to ruin his plans and pull him straight into a deep kiss that’s all tongue and teeth. He kisses you back just as passionately, tightening his grip on your hips. You shudder at the feeling of his claws digging in. He pulls back suddenly panting ever so slightly. 

“Can I see them now?” His eyes roam your form. 

“Only if you ask nicely.” 

He huffs a laugh and you’re about ready to respond when you feel the tip of his tail ghost over your clit. You gasp at the sudden feeling and smack him lightly on the arm. 

“I said ask.” You say as you begin to pull your top off. 

“It worked didn’t it?” He shrugs his shoulders with a smile. You throw the ball of fabric at his head. He pulls it off with a laugh, but stops when he sees your bare chest. You can see the outline of his cock straining against his pants. 

“You can touch them.” You whisper suddenly feeling a bit flustered by the way he’s looking at you. He slowly brings his hands to your forearms, trailing them up to your shoulders before letting go and tracing the design on your abdomen. 

“Have you never seen tattoos before?” You ask, watching his hands. 

“Of course I have but I just…I’ve never seen a human with so many. They’re all so different. They’re so beautiful. You’re beautiful.” 

You wrap your arms around the back of his head and pull him into another kiss sliding the tip of your tongue into the fork of his. You moan into his mouth when you feel his hands slide up to squeeze and knead your tits, swiping his thumb over your nipples. You thread your fingers through his hair, giving it a light tug before taking a few steps backwards towards your bed. You pull him without breaking contact as you fall into the plush mattress. You pull his head up by his hair to meet your eyes eliciting a breathy moan from him. His hands are rubbing circles into your hips, gently sliding over the hem of your pants. 

“Please?” He whines out not taking his eyes off the tattoo that dips below the waistline. 

“Fuck go right ahead baby boy.” You wiggle your hips to help him as he makes quick work of taking your pants and underwear off in one go before tossing his own shirt off who knows where. 

You’re both left staring in awe at each other, him completely enamored by the art adorning your skin, you mesmerized by the lichtenberg figure scars cutting through the entire left half of his body. Of course you had seen the scars on his face, but you had no idea they continued down so low. 

“You can touch them.” He says mirroring your positions from earlier. You prop yourself up on your elbows and lean forward to trail soft kisses from the epicenter to the branch that strikes up his neck pulling little whines and whimpers from him. You gasp and pull back when the scars pulse purple and little sparks of magic zap through you. 

“Shit sorry. I’m sorry. I can’t control it when I get excited.” He looks a little fearful. 

You just laugh and brush your hands over your lips “No it’s alright. It just shocked me.” 

There’s a heartbeat of silence before Phantom busts out laughing and you throw your head into the pillow with a groan at the accidental pun. 

“Alright that’s it, no more sex. That was too embarrassing.” 

“Nah you’re stuck with me now.” He lays his whole weight on you and buries his face into the crook of your neck purring wildly. The laugh you felt bubbling up turns into a moan when you feel him drag his fangs over your pulse point. He sucks a bruise into the skin before biting hard enough to leave a mark. He trails his lips from your shoulder to your collarbone, pausing briefly to add some art of his own on your tits before continuing down your abdomen to your hips. He makes sure to take his time, practically worshiping each design with his mouth when he passes over them. The whole thing has you shuddering and squirming beneath him. 

He scrapes his fangs from the tattoo on your hip to the one on your thigh. 

“I wonder if they’d make you taste different.” 

You knock him in the head gently with your knee.

“Don’t even think about it. I like that one too much for you to give me a piercing.” 

He hums in disappointment “Fine. I can always taste something else.” He says before burying himself between your legs. 

You gasp at the suddenness of it and scramble to find something to grasp. Your hand makes its way right back into his hair as he drags his forked tongue from your slit to your clit. He circles his tongue before taking it into his mouth and sucking, causing you to moan and push your hips closer to him. You feel him loop his tongue around your clit before snaking down to lap at your entrance. 

“Shit Phantom. Just like that. You’re such a good boy.” He moans against you as more sparks of quintessence ripple across his skin and over yours. You make a mental note of that reaction before you feel his impossibly long tongue sliding into you. 

You arch against his face, involuntarily squeezing your thighs around his head as you feel him lick places you didn’t even know existed. Your legs tremble as the gentle probing of his tongue becomes steadier, more earnest. 

“If you keep doing that I’m gonna fuck—“  He flexes his claws against the meat of your thighs as his brow furrows in a concentration you’ve never seen from the ghoul. He swirls his tongue through your folds before pushing it all the way back in, burying his nose against your clit. You can feel the swell of your orgasm deep in your stomach as he fucks you with this tongue. Another pulse of quintessence shoots through you and you can’t hold back. Your eyes slam shut as you cum against his face, moaning out a string of curses and praises. 

He pulls back and sits up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand before licking it. His eyes roll to the back of his head. 

“I need you. Right now.” 

“You can fucking have me baby boy.” 

He lets out a pleased trill and makes quick work of unbuckling his belt and wiggling out of his pants and boxers. As he’s doing this, you flip over onto your back. You feel him run the tips of his claws reverently tracing the tat there before sliding down to squeeze your ass. You look over your shoulder at him only to be met with the biggest, blown out eyes you’ve ever seen. 

“What?” You say cocking your head innocently “Just wanted to show you exactly what Dew was talking about.” 

He blushes so deep he’s practically glowing. The sight makes you laugh as you slowly lift your hips and tuck your knees to your stomach. He wastes no time in getting behind you. He digs his fingers into your hips to steady himself as he slowly drags the head of his cock against your slick. 

“Still can’t believe how wet humans get.” He mutters more to himself before he’s sliding gradually into you. You both moan when he bottoms out. He pauses for a moment letting you get accustomed to the feeling of him before he gives you a few experimental thrusts. You push your hips back against him searching for more and he gives it to you. He slides almost all the way out before pushing back in with one snap of his hips. He starts up a rhythmic pace as you arch your back and moan into the pillow. 

“You’re beautiful. You’re so beautiful. You’re so good.” He whines watching the way the design of the ink shifts and stretches with each movement of your body. His head rolls back on his shoulders when you clench around him. He snakes his hands between your thighs and rubs at your clit as he snaps into you, dragging the head of his cock against your walls. The air pulses with quintessence and when you turn your head to breathe you can see the room aglow with purple lighting. You steal a glance behind you and see his scars pulsing with magic, his head thrown back in absolute ecstasy. You can see his lips moving but you can’t hear anything coming out. 

You feel another ripple of quintessence and you squeeze around him with a moan. He keens forward and drapes himself over you searching for your hands while he desperately ruts into you. You feel the rubber band snap within you.

“Phantom oh fuck I’m gonna—“ another spark of magic and you’re done for. You cum on his cock, crying out little praises of ‘good boy’ as the wave of pleasure engulfs you. 

It only takes a few more thrusts before you feel him pull out and splash hotly onto your back. 

“Holy shit.” You pant out, letting yourself go limp into the bed. 

“Blasphemous.” he laughs and grabs his discarded shirt off the floor to wipe his spend off of you. 

When he’s done you roll back over only to be met with his glowing eyes looking down affectionately at you. You open your arms and he practically jumps into them shifting your positions around so that he’s the one holding you. You give him a kiss and scratch behind his pointed ear, smiling when you hear his tail thump against the bed. He keeps you pressed close to him. You can already feel his dick stiffening again. 

So maybe you were in for a longer night than you expected.

[judysxnd]

Pictures you take of Pedro : Vacation edition

I don’t know why but I struggle to do these? Not like writing them, but with the pictures. Every time I put another pic, it just puts the same as the first one 😭

A week off from work and you were both gone to the beach, needing to feel the hot sun on your skin, and swim a little. You enjoyed to stay on the sand, tanning, while Pedro went to swim. At some point he came back and sat next to you. You were on your phone, reading some articles, often texting some of your friends.

“How do you even see the screen?” Pedro just said as he was watching you carefully, his gaze wandering on your body from time to time. You laughed.

“I-I absolutely do not struggle to read at all” you said sarcastically. “I was bored” you shifted to face him, still holding your phone.

“You should have joined me, the water’s good”

“And leaving our stuff alone?”

“Good thinking” you both laughed. Your eyes went back to your phone, but you both kept talking. You wanted to unlock your phone but instead you opened the camera, so you decided to take this picture.

You never went to Chile, and Pedro took things in hand and booked a flight for the both of you to go there for two weeks. And it was amazing, he showed you so many things. One time, as you were walking back from the beach, he noticed a stand where you could drink coconut water directly in the coconut. He took your hand and just walked there. He took two, and you both sat down next to the stand and started to drink. You took this picture, locking a memory for life. It was one of the greatest trip ever.

You went hiking one day as the weather wasn’t too hot. You traveled to your family for a week during spring, and, not going to lie, it was like you were lost in the middle of the forest. But you took advantage of this, and decided to hike. As you did, at some point, (don’t even know how), you ended to a lake.

“The water doesn’t seem to be that cold” Pedro said

“Wait- you want to go in?” You laughed “we didn’t even take bathing suits” he smirked at you

“Who said we need them? There’s no one around us”

“You naughty boy” he just took his clothes off and went it the water, just like that. You took your phone out and took a picture, already knowing how you could caption it : “I’m pretty sure the water is under ten degrees but he went anyway”.

“A little cold at the beginning but you get used to it. Come on!”

You touched the water with your hand and gasped.

“A LITTLE cold? Are you kidding? It’s freezing! You’re going to get sick!”

“It will only be worth it if you join me!” He said, giving you puppy eyes that he knows you won’t resist. And he was right. You sighed, anticipating the cold water and getting sick afterwards, but you took your clothes off and joined him.

“Oh my god- why!! It’s freezing” he laughed

“Come here” he took your hands to get you closer to him.

“I hate you”

“Sure” he smiled, and kissed you. You stayed very close to him so that his heat could warm you up, as you enjoyed the view, talking a little, and also being children and playing around. You both ended up being sick afterwards but you had a lot of fun. He was right, it was worth it.

After hiking for a few hours to the mountain hut where you were going to stay, you took a break to enjoy the view. The mountains around, the sun, the temperature was perfect. You really enjoyed being able to travel a lot with Pedro. You weren’t used to that and always regretted not traveling before, but it was worth the wait.

You were sitting on a bench, and Pedro was standing a little further in front of you, feeling the warmth on him. You were taking pictures of the mountains, but in the middle, you took this one. This trip was definitely going to be added to the best ones.

[slushyseals]

All videos showing people removing barnacles from sea turtles are not rescue videos, they're animal abuse- even if the video is "real".

Please report these videos as abuse and stop letting these people profit off rescue videos

There are many videos where the "rescuer" is actually the one who attached the barnacles in the first place (some you can even see the hot glue underneath as they pull off the pieces). Unless you see the animal in a rescue center with a vet tech treating it, that animal is being abused. How so?

The reason those growths are there is likely something far more dangerous that needs to be addressed. Healthy turtles do not get this level of growth on their shells. So if you see something like this, it’s a sign that this turtle is unwell and has been sick for a while. Scraping off the growths doesn’t solve the underlying issue. Also, doing so without any tools or pain medication can be extremely painful and stressful for the turtle. Often with this level of growth, barnacles will have borrowed through the turtle’s shell into live tissue. And just ripping them off like this without the expertise of a medical professional can do more harm than good. Not to mention that it is WAY stressful and not what the turtle needs most. Imagine if you had a the stomach flu or food poisoning and someone decided to “help” you by first detangling your hair, popping pimples, and exfoliating you when what you really need is fluids and someone to handle you very gently. It’s focusing on the wrong problem first and can worsen the underlying condition.

If you see an animal "rescue" video, always think- how did they find this animal? (Is it likely they just found an animal- or did they put an animal in danger to play hero for clout and ad profits? How did this animal get into this terrible situation in the first place? (The number of giant snakes found wrapped around a dog is pretty unbelievable- usually it's a person abusing two animals they own.) How is this person running into so many animals in dangerous situations? (Especially when you look at their other videos and they reuse the same animals to "save".) I am outside daily and I don't come across anywhere near as many animals needing help like these content farm channels.

Even when videos are real, if they are not a trained rescue worker they are often doing more harm than good! The people kidnapping tortoises and "saving" them by throwing them out into lakes and rivers might have just killed that animal. Many tortoises are land animals and aren't built for swimming like sea turtles, they can easily drown! A surprising number of people don't understand seals need to rest on shore, and end up killing babies and harassing adults by chasing them into the water. Baby seals can't swim for long distances, and chasing them into the water means their mom won't be able to find the baby after she's done hunting fish- the baby will slowly starve to death if actual rescue workers do not intervene!

Heck, some people have found perfectly healthy and happy baby seals waiting for their moms on the beach, but because the person doesn't understand that the mom isn't there 100% of the time think the baby has been abandoned; a man kidnapped a pup when the rescue wouldn't send someone out to get the animal which not only hurt that pup whom he caused to be an orphan, but now that pup is taking up resources that could have been given to babies that actually needed it. Rescues don't have infinite resources and I don't want to put to words what can happen when they reach maximum capacity. (The guy was also very lucky he didn't get bit- seal bite infections are much worse than regular bites!) So many others people mistreat because they don't know better, like the baby seal that had people dumping water and ice on it like it was Free Willy. Or trying to feed them sandwiches. Both of these actions make life worse for the animal.

That video of a dog as a service animal rehabilitating a baby seal? That was made by a couple idiots who likely scared the mother off and caused the baby to starve to death just so they could make their intentionally misinformative video knowing full well they were lieing! Dogs should be leashed and kept far away from any seal as they are a reason many seals are horrifically mauled to death each year! Videos like this are absolutely vile as they misinform the public who own dogs and may see a seal on the beach and think, "Oh! My dog is a good boy and can go play with the water puppy! They enjoy that!" Please do not do this! Seals shouldn't be encouraged to associate with or like dogs, that puts puts in danger not only of cross contamination with things that can make them very sick, but you don't know the temperament of any and every dog that seal will see in its lifetime. All it takes is one- and there are plenty of dogs who act fine around human children and vicious around a random seal they find. The babies don't even have a chance against a full grown dog! Their ONLY chance is that situation never happens; keep your dog leashed, because it will see that seal and shoot off before you can stop it. As well behaved as your dog is on the best day, it has free will and at the end of the day is a dog and will be an animal.

Let's face it, most of us don't know the proper care of any and every wild animal we could run into and can only guess when faced with a genuinely unexpected situation. Any legitimate rescue video should start with the person contacting the local rescue to ask the experienced and knowledgeable staff what should be done if they themselves are not a trained rescuer. Often times the animal is perfectly fine, humans just see something they don't expect and misread what's going on causing a situation that didn't previously exist. Other times if there is an issue, the rescue will instruct the person what to do- which may be to keep an eye on the animal until trained rescuers can arrive. And lastly, please be aware of fake animal rescue channels and report any videos you see and inform others about this so these channels stop being praised and profiting from animal abuse.

[softlyspector]

Solid Ground

Summary: Benny likes you a lot, you like Benny a lot. Both of you are determined not to get that.

Pairing: Ben "Benny" Miller x Reader

Word Count: ~13.2k

Warnings: idiots in love, pining, canon level violence, PTSD, mental health issues, panic attacks, mild harassment and threats of violence

A/N: Thank you for reading! Again, I am so very aware I’m writing in what is probably a dead fandom for a meh movie. That being said, please let me know what you think!

The afternoon is slow, hot. 

Like most afternoons at the bar. 

The Florida air is so heavy and thick with humidity, it feels like something you could swim through if you really tried. There’s a lethargic weight in the air, like you’re slowly sinking into the mire of your own life, the dreariness of the mundane and the everyday.

All the folding doors are open onto the deck that overlooks the lake, umbrellas open over the tables to keep the sun at bay. But the only patrons, a group of older men that come in at the same time everyday to drink together, currently sit inside beneath the lazily rotating ceiling fans. 

The only balm against the pain of manning a tiny bar in a small town that hardly saw any customers during the endless afternoon shift, is that the owner doesn’t mind you reading on the clock if there are no customers that need your attention.

John likes you well enough and knows you’re competent. He also knows how slow things can get, but refuses to close up shop during the afternoons. He’s ran the bar the same way for forty years, and he’d be damned if he started doing things differently just because the town’s population and tourist traffic had shrunk a little. 

So, once your regulars are taken care of, happy with beers and lowball glasses of whiskey straight, you take a seat on the barstool behind the counter and prop open your book against a bottle of tequila. 

Sweat drips down your spine as a warm, heavy breeze drifts through the bar, bringing you the scent of lake water and sunshine. A local rock station plays lowly from the overhead speakers, and a peace settles between your bones. The low conversation and sudden loud chuckles from the regulars, along with the buzz of crickets and cicadas, the lap of water against the wooden poles of the deck, make for good background noise. 

The front door opens and you glance up, trying not to look too excited, too giddy. But a smile pulls at your lips despite your best efforts. 

And Benny Miller smiles openly at you, unabashedly happy to see you. He beelines toward you, waving at the regulars who all know him by name in this small town. 

They know Ben Miller the MMA fighter, Ben Miller the soldier.

But they also know him as Benny Miller the troublemaker, as Will Miller’s little brother Benny.

“Hey, Ben,” they call and he glances over his shoulder to flash that famous Benny grin, hyena wide and begging for trouble. 

The breeze carries the scent of Benny’s soap and cologne to you. Though he’s in jeans and a t-shirt, you can tell he’s just finished up at the gym, the edges of his hair still damp beneath his usual backwards ratty cap. 

“Hey babe,” he coos at you, dropping a battered copy of the last book you’d loaned him onto the counter before rounding the bar to envelope you in a hug that nearly knocks you out of your seat. 

“Easy,” you remind him even as you fold one arm tightly around him, smoothing your fingers down his spine, that clean soap and earthy smell that’s distinctly Benny wrapping around you. “Hey, pretty boy.”

He clings onto you, his nose pressed against your temple, for just a tad too long. And you have to tap his back with a laugh when your lungs feel like they might collapse. 

He skims his lips across your forehead before releasing you, grinning big and wide at you as you snap your own book closed to give him the attention you know he's about to demand. “Miss me?” he asks as he takes a seat on the opposite side of the counter. 

“You don’t give me much of a chance to miss you, Miller,” you say, raising a brow at him. “We see each other almost every day.”

“And ya miss me every single day,” he confirms to himself with a nod, nudging the book he deposited on the counter closer to you. “I liked this one.” 

“Really? I’m a little bit surprised,” you pick the book up and flick through your worn copy of Stephen King’s Carrie. “Why’d you like it?” 

“Big fan of goin’ out with a bang,” he grins, leaning over the counter to brace his forearms against the bar and drop his head. You can hear his leg shaking where he bounces it against the floor on the other side of the bar. 

You shake your head and take the book to stack on top of your own. “You want another one or are you good for now?” 

“Sure, what d’ya got for me?” 

“Why don’t you come over to my place and you can pick something yourself?” You offer. “And you know you don’t have to get something else right away? You can take a break.” 

In the months you’d known Benny, he’d never struck you as a reader. But a couple of weeks ago he’d suddenly asked for a recommendation. Benny, you’re almost positive, has undiagnosed ADHD, so his sudden interest in something like reading had surprised you, though you'd been happy to recommend something to him. You were more than happy to have an excuse to invite him over to your place, if only to look through your book collection.

Benny preferred motion and action to something like sitting down with a book - MMA, fishing, running - literally anything but sitting down for hours on end. Stillness and silence did not suit Benny and you almost wonder how it was that he was getting through your books so quickly. 

Whatever the reason for his foray into reading, you're glad for it, glad to have someone to talk with about books.

“Nah, I’m good,” he laughs. “I got you to keep up with now.”

You roll your eyes, “Do you have to be competitive about everything?”

“Yeah.” 

“You want anything today? Or are you just bored again?”  

“No,” his eyes flick over you, the corner of his mouth twitching up. “Just knew you’d be missin’ my company.” 

Benny never orders anything, not since the day you met him and not unless he hung around long enough for the dinner crew to start drifting in. He mostly just came in to keep you company - as he put it, or annoy you - as you’d put it. 

“That so?” You can’t help but grin, shifting in your seat to cross your arms over your chest, “And who told you that, huh?” 

He smiles wider at you. “You always gotta be so mean to me?” He jokes, lifting his gaze and peering at you from beneath his lashes, eyes wide and open and so pretty it makes your breath stall.

You glance away from him, skimming your thumb over the pages of your book instead, to avoid meeting his eyes, a gaze that hid absolutely nothing from you. “Any other thoughts about Carrie?” 

“Not about her, no.” 

“What about then?” 

“Thinkin’ about how I’m so smokin’ hot you can’t even look at me.” 

You flash your eyes back up at him, “Careful, Ben, I might think you’re flirting with me.” 

“Oh, honey, trust me, I’m trying.” 

You reach out and touch a yellowing bruise at the edge of his temple. He winces against your touch. “Maybe. Good thing I think you’re pretty when you’re a little rough around the edges, huh?” You try not to think about how he leans into your hand, reaches up and holds your hand to his face, even when you press your thumb harder into the bruise.

Benny Miller had stormed into your life for the first time a few months ago. It had been raining, a temperamental, torrential rain that had the bar’s parking lot flooded in minutes. 

He’d swung through the door mad as hell, his lip split, his cheek cut and bruised, soaked to the bone. His t-shirt had clung to him in all the right places, ridges of muscle and padding visible beneath. Cerulean blue eyes had been nearly eaten up by the black of his pupils. 

A bandage had been wrapped around his upper arm, partially undone and spooling down his bicep, boots thumping against the worn floorboards as he closed in on you at the bar. 

You had wondered for a half a second if you should be afraid of him, alone in the bar as you were, even the regulars kept away by the horrible weather. 

But he’d only sat at the counter and brusquely ordered a beer. Those blown out pupils - so easily mistaken for fury, had held something deeper. 

Fear. 

He had been terrified of something, fingers drumming nervously on the bar, a shake in his hand. 

“Little early for that, isn't it?” You’d asked, watching his brows tilt up as he ran a hand through locks dampened and darkened by the rain. “Rough day?” 

“Sweetheart,” he’d said, his voice low and graveled with just a hint of a twang. It was a voice that had made you melt, that softened everything inside you into mush. “You have no fuckin’ idea.” He sounded exhausted, breathing hard and fast like he’d just got done running a race. 

You’d raised a brow at that and handed him the beer you poured from the tap. For a few long minutes, you only watched him sip his beer.

Veteran, you’d marked him out easy. 

And he needed a distraction - so you chatted at him, telling him about how you’d rewatched Top Gun recently, mindlessly talking as the tension slowly rolled out of his shoulders and his grip on the glass loosened until his fingers weren’t quite so white with pressure. 

You still wouldn't be sure, even months later, if he’d heard a word you said that day. But your voice alone had seemed to be enough to ground him.

“I got a first aid kit here. Want me to take care of that for you?” You had eventually offered when his breathing stabilized, nodding at his busted cheek. “So you don’t go home with an infection. Gangrene or something.” 

He’d barked out an unexpected laugh at that. “Don’t think I’m at risk for gangrene,” he snorted. 

You shrugged. “Want me to or not?” His only answer had been a sheepish nod, an offering of his face to you with a jut of his chin. 

He hadn’t told you what happened and you hadn’t asked. You had only moved around the counter, cleaned the cut and stuck a butterfly bandage over it, dabbed the blood from his split lip where he'd worried a wound open with his teeth. You had changed and rewrapped the bandage on his arm. The gauze was old and clearly hadn’t been changed in awhile. 

And while it looked like he’d been shot, you hadn’t mentioned it. 

“What’s your name, honey?” he’d asked you when you finished, his voice saccharine to your ears, slow and sweet and so low, like gravel wrapped in sunshine. 

And, oh, you’d liked that. Liked how he sounded when he called you honey. Liked the slow, sweet drip of it.

You gave him your name, and he’d repeated it back to you, like it was something vital that needed to be committed to memory, your hand still on the curve of his bicep, your body still very close to his. “Ben,” he’d informed you, even though you hadn’t asked for his name in return. “Benny Miller. You knew around here?” 

“Been in town just a couple months. But just started workin’ here.”

“And you always patch up customers like this?” He’d asked, the last dregs of  anger and fear lingering around him dissipating fast, a smile that you would come to know as his signature look spreading over his face. 

“Only the pretty ones, Miller.” Without realizing it, you’d gravitated so very close to him, his thighs bracketing your body but not touching you as you worked on his face. Something warm had bloomed between you then, that made you step back and look away, that made you take your hand off his arm where his skin was so warm it burned. 

Something bloomed between you that would make Benny hang around for the rest of your shift, that made him walk you to your car, and come back the next day and the next day and the next…

“Not pretty,” he'd disagreed. “Handsome? Yeah. Hot? Fuck yeah.”

You laughed, watched him beam with pride at the sound. “With eyes like those? Ben, you’re pretty.”

And ever since that day, he’s made a point to stop in the bar during the afternoon. He claims he has time with the way his training schedule works out and you can’t really complain. Benny makes good company. He’s a good storyteller, loud and energetic and fun, and always interested in whatever you have to say even if he doesn’t always remember what exactly you say. 

He’s become a constant presence in your life, a fast friend that stuck. And soon enough, it became hard to imagine your life without him, without his regular appearances at the bar. 

More often than not he hangs around until your shift ends, walks you to your car, still talking, before asking you to take a drive with him. 

And you always find yourself saying yes. 

Benny can talk. He chats constantly about anything and everything - MMA, baseball, anecdotes from his time in the military, his little family of friends. Lately, he talks with you about the books he borrows, movies you watch and rewatch together. 

The military thing comes up suddenly and without preamble, like it's something everyone already knew about him, ingrained into his identity. And although he openly tells you about his service, there’s a pain that lies beneath, something that he’s not yet come to terms with, a crinkle in his brow that concerns you. 

Some days, his hands shake a little. 

Some days, his breathing isn’t ever quite even. 

Benny is going through something, and you think he hasn’t told a soul about it. 

You quickly felt at home in his passenger seat, going too fast down country roads, listening to him talk, radio all the way up, windows all the way down. 

Sometimes you go to the lake, sometimes to an empty, open field that Benny seems to know well - sitting in the back of the jeep with the seats down until the stars come out. 

You’ve spent almost all your free time with Benny over the last few months. You go to baseball games together on the Fridays he doesn’t have an MMA match, and spend most Saturday mornings fishing together. His face is usually stained yellow and green from the previous night, broken blood vessels blooming purple and red, a cut to the cheek and above his brow. You always call him pretty and he always pretends to hate it. 

You’ve gone to Topgolf together more than once and been kicked out each time for being too loud and rowdy and drunk. He’s taken you to the shooting range and taught you how to handle a weapon though you insist it's not knowledge you want or need, while Benny insists that it is. 

He somehow becomes your best friend, worms his way inside your heart, in such a short period of time that you can’t imagine your life without him, especially not in this town. 

Now, Ben leans back when you pull your hand away from his face, flexing not so subtly. You can tell by the way he sits, the bunched coil of muscle in his forearms twisting as he settles more fully in his chair, chest puffed out.

You roll your eyes at the display. Ben’s flirting is about as subtle as a hammer to the head. 

“Well, actually, babe, I have a bone to pick with you.” 

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Invited you to my fight and you didn’t show. You’re making a bad impression with my buddies. They’re starting to think I made you up.” 

He says it so casually, almost like it’s a joke, a megawatt smile still on his face, but you can tell Benny is hurt. Your heart gives a painful thump and you cast him a small smile in return. “I told you I wouldn’t be able to make it, didn’t I?” 

“Sure ya did,” he whines, leaning forward again, “But I thought you meant it in a faking me out kinda way so I’d be surprised.” Before you can respond, he continues, fidgeting with a loose bit of wood on the counter. “What was so important anyways? You have a date or somethin’?” 

You slap his hand away from the wood before he can damage the scarred bar more than it already is. Benny never stops moving, fidgeting, usually destroying napkins and paper drink coasters and straw papers in droves as he talks to you. “Yeah, actually. And what happened to that fidget thing I got you? The pop-it?” 

And the stress ball, you think. To help with whatever he was bottling up inside, waiting for the emotions to shake up and erupt in a bout of anger instead of dealing with them beforehand.

Benny ignores your question and goes deadly still, the vibrations echoing through the floor from his bouncing leg ceasing. “You serious?” 

You feign nonchalance, twisting the liquor bottles in front of you so their labels face out. “Yep. So serious. We fucked in the parking lot and he bought me Taco Bell after,” you deadpan.  

Ben laughs, the sound loud and unapologetic, so very Benny it makes something in you ache. But there’s something else in that laugh too - relief. “Really, though.” 

“For real,” you say.

You had gone on a date, but it had been a bad one. One in which you had been bored out of your mind. One in which your date talked at you and not with you. He had been so low energy - or maybe he hadn’t been. Maybe you’d just been comparing him to Benny, who made everyone seem low energy. 

You’d had dinner and left. There hadn’t been any random detours to the batting cages or a race against time down back roads, no here, honey, lemme show you this ice cream joint by the water-

It had been a date where you thought of a different guy the entire time, wondering if Benny was looking for you at his fight, wondering if he was getting his ass handed to him or making some money with a win.

The truth is - Benny terrifies you. 

You’re terrified of him, you’re terrified of the way he makes you feel, of the heart pounding, blood warming way he looks at you. 

And you know that he wants something from you. 

And it's something you aren’t really willing to give. 

Benny is a flirt, a curl of energy that bounced from thing to thing with surprising ease. The only constants in his life were his family and the military and fighting - and you do not fit into any of those spaces. 

Benny loses interest in things at a rapid rate, and you’re sure you’re just another stepping stone, something that would only hold his attention briefly. 

And you do not want to become just another thing that Benny Miller lost interest in. 

You don’t want a night with him, especially if it meant losing him after, of losing these conversations, these moments, all the things you’d done together and shared. You don’t want to lose his friendship. 

Friendship for Benny is made of much sturdier stuff, long lasting and fierce. 

And if Benny wanted more than that, he’d just tell you. He’s one to take the things he wants, or at least ask, instead of letting them fall into his lap. 

So you keep him at arm's length, knocking him back a step or two each time he hints at something besides this thing you have with him now. And meeting his friends, going to one of his matches, feels too close for comfort, feels too personal and raw and vulnerable. 

You would lose Benny and the things truly closest to his heart if you were to let that happen. 

Besides, you’ve been left alone before and you aren’t keen on it happening again.

He rolls his eyes at you, “Uh huh, sure.” Benny drums his fingers against the bar, though he doesn’t sound particularly convinced. “Listen, I get it's intimidating -,” he starts when you scoff at his assumption, “Hold on! Let me finish! I know it's intimidating but I’m always fine. And it would mean a lot to me. And the guys.” 

You soften. That he thinks you don’t want to go because you don’t want to see him hurt, makes your chest ache. 

“Oh believe me, Ben, I’d love to watch you get your ass kicked.” 

He flashes a smile at you, yanking the ball cap off his head to toss onto the counter. You lift a brow at him as he laces his fingers together against the back of his head, arms wide. “Oh yeah? Perfect opportunity right in front of you then,” he says with a shit-eating grin. “But I’m usually the ass-kicker.” 

You’re always surprised at just how much room Benny takes up, the space he occupies without a care in the world, summer gold skin washed out in the low lighting of the bar. You also really don’t mind the pull of the band of muscle in his arms, or the way his shirt rides up so you can see the flat of his belly, the dark trail of hair. “Of course you are,” you roll your eyes, forcing yourself to focus only on his face. 

Benny’s expression splinters, his smile fading for just a second, brows tilting down. “Is it something else? Why don’t you -,” 

He’s interrupted when the front door blows open and your name is called. You cringe, John’s horrible son Victor violently thrusting into you and Benny’s safe little world. You'd hated Victor before you met Benny, for the way he looked at you, the slimy innuendos he made, but you hated him even more after. 

He and Benny had gone to high school together, hated each other then too. And Victor never lets Benny forget that he thinks he’s trash. 

“Oh, and Miller is here too. How wonderful,” he snaps, the smile he’d been directing at you turning to a scowl when his gaze lands on Ben.  

Benny bristles immediately, standing up and knocking his stool back but not over. “What the fuck is your problem?” He asks loudly. “You always got some shit to say to me.” 

“Just wondering how you can get drunk in the middle of the day, everyday. Don’t you have a job?” Victor’s eyes flit over Benny’s broken face, the bruises that never quite faded. “Oh. Right. You get the shit kicked out of you for a living.” 

“Better watch your fuckin’ mouth,” he snarls, the converstaion of the regulars in the corner coming to an abrupt halt. Benny’s never afraid to defend himself, and he certainly wasn't afraid to make a scene while doing so. “I don’t lose much.” 

You hold out a hand when Benny starts around the counter. “Benny,” you say gently, “C’mon. Stop it.” 

Victor stops next to you, his hand going to your hip and you force yourself not to jerk away from his touch, as he intentionally tries riling Benny up. “Yeah, Miller. Stand down. We all know how good you are at following orders and not using your brain.” 

Benny’s chin tilts down, eyes on Victor’s possessive hand against your waist. Something goes dark in his gaze and this time he does come around the bar. 

You move quickly, grabbing Benny’s hat off the counter and both your books before shoving Victor’s stupid ass behind you as he laughs. “Fuckin’ idiot, it's like you want to get the shit kicked out of you,” you mutter at him as as you step in front of Benny. He's fuming, leaning against you, pushing with a gentle strength, unwilling to hurt you to get to Victor.

Benny would never hurt you, but he looks like he’s considering shoving you out of the way. His eyes go cold as he watches Victor over your shoulder and you don’t turn because you don’t want to know what gesture he’s doing behind you. You press into Ben, leaning hard against his solid frame, laying one hand flat against his sternum. “He’s not worth it. Let it go. For me, Benny?” You plead with a calm you don’t feel, “C’mon, I’ll walk you out. Leave this asshole to man the bar.” 

He smirks at that, sliding an arm around your shoulders, holding you hot and tight and close against his chest. You swear you can feel his heartbeat. “Anything for you, sweetheart,” he says, the lilt of fury still lingering in his voice. You pull out of his arms and he follows you out of the bar easily when you tug him after you. 

“You always do everything you’re told, Miller?” Victor calls after your retreating backs. 

“Fuck you,” Benny snarls over his shoulder. “Only when she’s the one asking.” And he sounds almost proud. 

Proud that you chose him, proud that you commanded him.

Something in you shakes, that this hot headed man listens to you. 

You keep one hand behind you, tucked into Benny’s elbow so that he doesn’t get any ideas about bolting back to give Victor the beating he very much deserved. 

“I hate that fucker,” he says when you finally pull him outside to cross the parking lot towards his jeep, his hand trailing down your arm to lace his fingers with yours. “Always have. Made all the girls uncomfortable in school. And the way he fuckin’ talks about you-,” 

“I hate him too, Benny,” you interrupt. “But he’s my boss’s son, what am I supposed to do?” You pause by the driver’s side door and reach up to tuck Benny’s hat back onto his head, cradling your books against your chest as you stroke some stray hair back from his forehead. “Go easy, darlin’. He shouldn’t fuckin’ talk about you that way either. Fucking snob.” 

“I’m used to it,” he says, breaking your heart just a little bit. “But you don’t hear the shit he says when you aren’t around. I should have knocked his teeth down his throat weeks ago.” 

You close your eyes briefly, hearing every horrible thing Victor has ever said to you about Benny. Namely that he was stupid and mean and not worth the time you spent on him. “Yeah, well, ditto,” you say bitterly, blinking up at him, the last argument fresh in your mind. 

“He’s a loser and he always has been. He’s lucky he has Will for a brother and feels like he needs to play catch up and get out of his shadow or he wouldn’t have made it out of high school.”

Benny watches you, eyes darting between the bar’s door and you, his expression souring by the second as he monitors you. “Don’t,” you warn. 

“Not gonna,” he says innocently. 

“Liar.” 

“Why don’t ya wanna come to my matches?” He asks abruptly, remembering what you’d been talking about before you were interrupted. 

You sigh, “It's not that I don’t want to. I’m just-,” you fidget on the spot, trying to decide how to put it, wiggling your fingers at him. “-I just worry about you.” 

It isn’t untrue, just not exactly the reason you didn’t want to go. 

“Bullshit,” he says, calling you out. 

“Benny,” you say gently, ducking your head to avoid his eyes. “I-,”

He shakes his head, “Don’t worry about it. I got you.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Just what I said. I got it. You don’t want to,” he yanks open the door and you’re forced to stumble back a few steps as he climbs in. The engine roars to life and Benny rolls the window down to look at you. “Forgot. Got this for you. Meant to bring it in with me,” he says, handing out something rectangular, wrapped in pink paper. 

You take it from him, peering up at him before you abruptly tear the paper and he groans, “Don’t open it now.” 

But you just keep shredding the wrapping paper until a book is revealed to you, a limited edition of one of your favorites. “Oh,” you say, running a finger down the cover. You’d been looking for this particular edition for over a year. “Oh, my God! Benny, how’d you find this?” 

He shakes his head, “Don’t worry about it. You like it?” 

You clutch it to your chest. “Fuck. Yes. Thank you.” You stare at Benny, and he stares back at you, the sweltering heat pinching at your skin. Since when did Benny go hunting for obscure books? Since when did he read in his limited free time?

“Fuck, Benny. Listen, I’m sorry, okay? I just don’t know how to explain it right. Can I ride along? Lemme go tell Victor to fuck off and we can go to my place for your book. Dinner on me?”

You know John won’t mind, not if you leave a note that you needed to leave an hour early and that his useless son came in before he was supposed to. 

The grin that cracks open Ben’s face could end wars. “Never gonna say no to that.” 

~

Benny really isn’t sure what it is about you that drew him in, like a moth to a flame, that first time he met you - dripping wet and mad as hell when he stormed into the first bar he came to. 

He’d just freaked out in a gas station convenience store - panicked and panicked and couldn’t fucking breathe for a full minute before he was able to leave - all because someone was too close to him and he was trying not to put his hand through a freezer door or through the guy’s fucking head. 

He hadn’t. 

He hadn’t and had been proud of that fact until he was back in his jeep and that tightness in his chest still wouldn’t go away, even though he was safe, even though he’d never not been. 

Benny had had half a mind to call Will, to ask him to come pick him up because he didn’t think he could drive, felt like maybe he was having a fucking heart attack. 

But then the anger set in, the irritation that now, after everything - this was happening to him. 

It was just another thing to add onto the shit that just kept stacking up. He’d heard about guys going through this when they came home. Fuck, he’d seen Will go through it. 

But why him?

Why now? 

After all these years? After he’d been home for so long?

Just because of the Colombia trip? It wasn’t even close to being the worst thing he’s been through.

Just because one of his closest friends, a man who was like his brother, had been killed in front of him? 

Fuck off. 

It’s not the first time - it hadn’t been that bad - 

For a while he hadn’t realized what was happening to him - why his chest would go tight and the air in the room felt like it had suddenly evaporated. 

Fuck, he doesn’t want to be having panic attacks, doesn’t want to think about what he went through, doesn’t want to think about why this was suddenly happening. 

And if he doesn't look at it, it can't hurt him. If he doesn't look at it, it would go away. 

So he ignored that it was happening at all. Even though it was happening more and more frequently. 

Still, that day, his chest was tight, his heart pounding so hard he thought it might explode. 

The anger suddenly burned up the tightness, made him so pissed off at himself for being so weak, that he knew he’d be no good in training, and decided to go for a drink instead. 

No, he hadn’t punched anyone that day.

And that was good, something to be proud of. 

Everything else? Shit. 

The cut on his cheek was from an unregulated fight in some fucking parking lot the day before, the bandage around his arm unchanged since he got home from Colombia two weeks before. 

Nothing had felt right since they got home. It was worse than before, worse than when he was discharged from service.

Fighting in parking lots? He hadn’t done that shit since high school. Everything felt like it was twisting down and away, the tentative grip he held on his life slipping away with every second. 

His first instinct was to do something stupid, to go find a fight or break a speed limit. 

But he couldn’t. He shouldn’t.

And so the bar it was. 

And you had been there - an unsuspecting buoy in a restless storm, so calm and rock steady, his exact opposite in so many ways. 

The immediate sharp burn of your presence, the steady way you’d looked at him, unfazed by the roll of anger that he tried to keep a lid on, how you’d not asked him a damn thing about what happened to him - why he was so torn up and spaced out and mad. 

He probably wouldn’t have been able to answer you anyways.

You talked to him as he nursed that beer, told him about a movie you’d rewatched recently - something old and he wishes he could remember now what it was - Top Gun? Back to the Future? 

No idea. 

Then you’d asked if you could help him out - one nonsensical, calm brow raised.

He’d known in that moment, that he’d never be able to quit you, so suddenly and quick, like a flash of lightning - something inside him locked into place.

But Benny had always been that way with his loyalty, a gut instinct that he trusted implicitly. 

He knew you were a person he should keep.

It was like when he’d known that his life would never be the same five seconds into his first day of basic training, like he’d known fighting was what he wanted to do the second he stepped into the ring that first time. 

He knew. 

Benny knew you were for keeps, that you were going to stick inside him like a burr, something that would be painful to rip out - just like fighting, just like the military, just like Delta.

You’re something he can’t quit.  

You’re something unchangeable and steady in his life. You become one of his constants only hours after meeting you. 

And he doesn't want you to quit him. Benny wants you to want him too. He wants you to hold on tight, to claw your way into him and make a home there.  

But fuck, do you make it difficult.

You are adverse to him making a move, knocking him back again and again. If you hinted that you wanted more he’d shoot his shot but you don’t indicate that. 

And that’s fine, it really is. 

He’ll be friends with you and nothing else if that’s what you really want. 

But that thing you lodged in his heart? It has sharp edges and its starting to fucking hurt, to ache, to bleed.

He spends all his time with you - you’re like a drug he doesn’t want to quit. 

And when he’s with you? That’s when he finally breathes normally again, when his blood settles down and he feels like Benny again - he can forget about what happened in Colombia, he doesn’t have to think about the spray of Tom’s blood when he was shot. 

He starts spending all his time with you, you become his best friend so suddenly it's almost shocking.

He stops fighting in back alleys and parking lots, and he can tell Will is relieved by the set of his shoulders when the bruising on his face actually gets a chance to fade. He can tell that you are relieved, because you note how his hands aren’t as shaky, you note that the bruises fade and that he doesn’t space out as much, breathing like he’s run a fucking race completely out of the blue. 

That fucks him up so bad too, that you’ve noticed the panic. 

Still, you don’t come to his matches, you don’t meet Will or Santi or Frankie. 

Maybe he’s just something temporary to you even though you have become a constant to him. 

And that’s never happened before, and it terrifies him. 

He’s always been the one to call the shots in his own life - he’s never had to wait for someone to decide on him. Benny has always been the temporary thing, jumping from relationship to relationship with ease. 

And fuck if he isn’t trying to tell you, to light the path so he can shoot his fucking shot. He started reading, and even though he’s coming to enjoy it a little - just because you light up like the goddamned sun when you get to talk about books - it's not easy for him. It takes concentration and frustrated brain power. He thinks for a while maybe you don't get it - but fuck if him taking up reading isn't a flashing neon sign of attraction, of trying to impress you and relate to you, he doesn't know what is.

He looked for a fucking book for you with an intensity he reserved for fighting, for missions, hunting and bidding and cajoling until he got it. Until he felt like he won a fight when he found it. 

For you. 

Now, he watches you unlock the front door of your apartment. He holds the screen door open for you as you fiddle with your keys, eyes locked on the curve of your jaw as you talk, intoxicated by the scent of you, the movement of your mouth, the flash of your teeth.

He’s pressed close to you, the heat of your body radiating into his as he leans into you. 

One thing he really appreciates about you? You’re good with how he expresses himself - the too loud way in which he lives his life, the way he likes to touch. 

Too many relationships had soured early - not that he was planning for the long haul but still - because he was too much. 

Too loud, too brash, too quick to temper. 

You’ve never told him he’s too much, never told him not to be the way he is. You say gentle things like easy to remind him not to squeeze you too tightly in a hug but that’s it and sometimes he needs the reminder, forgets his own strength. 

But you never tell him to stop, you never say that he’s too much. 

“Jesus, Benny,” you say now when the door finally swings open and you lurch inside. “You’re heavy.” 

He grins and toes his shoes off by the door as you do the same. “Sorry,” he says, not sorry at all, tucking himself behind you as he follows you to the kitchen. 

He loves your little studio, loves that he can see everything about you in one room, your bookshelves and your pink sheets patterned with tiny little strawberries, your vintage coffee table saved from someone’s trash and the stickers you’ve pressed into your kitchen cabinets. 

“I’m going to cook something.” 

“We can definitely just get takeout though,” he says, throwing himself down onto your couch with a groan. 

He doesn’t need to look at you to know that you’re rolling your eyes. “Ben, one day you’re going to be old and all that shit is going to catch up to you.” He hears you shuffle closer, and then you lean over the back of the couch, peering down at him, “And then you’re going to come to me and complain that I didn’t warn you and feed you better.” 

“You still gonna be hounding me when you’re old and gray?” 

For a second, your face cracks, an unreadable expression crossing your face before you smile again, some of the light gone from your eyes. “Sure,” you say, voice careful, “Someone’s gonna haveta.” 

“We can order pizza,” he says, trying to decide why the look on your face, that flash of uncertainty, made his chest tight, why panic is starting its slow unpredictable crawl up the back of his throat.

Maybe because it reminds him that you’re temporary. Maybe that’s why it's hard to breathe, why Tom’s face and the flash of blood imprints into his mind, why Will’s face stark white while blood drips down his side darts behind his eyes. 

Maybe you wouldn't be around to remind him, maybe you aren't planning to be.

Benny relies on very few permanent things, always moving, going, tracking forward and leaving most things behind. 

But there are essentials - fighting, Delta, the military - and now, you.

He wants to ask why you’re looking at him like that but the tightness in his chest is rising and he can’t speak. 

You place a hand on his chest, and it's heavy and good and it steadies him. His breathing stabilizes. “No pizza. I’ll make spaghetti.” You nod at your bookshelf, “Anything you want is yours, okay? When you’re ready.” 

And you walk away, back to the kitchen counter, searching through the fridge for ingredients. 

He’s glad you leave him, struggling to find the right rhythm in his breathing even though the breaths come easily. 

Since when did people leaving scare him so fucking bad? Since when did anything scare him this fucking bad? 

He wonders why you hold him at arm’s length, keeping yourself away from the most important parts of his life, of himself. 

Maybe you know you’re too good for him. 

He hears what that fucker Victor says about him, that you’re too good to be keeping company like Benny, that he’s an idiot and always has been. 

Benny isn’t sure how much of it you believe. 

When the pain eases, he stands and pulls himself to your bookshelf, scanning for the most battered copies. 

You abuse your books, but only the ones you like, the ones you read again and again, filled with notes and tabs and folded pages, covers shredded to bits. That’s how he knows you love roughly and hard, and it makes picking something out so easy. 

The cover of Carrie had been picked apart. 

He thumbs out one of the more ruined books and glances at the title - Howl’s Moving Castle. Something clearly for kids. Even better - it’ll be easy to get through. 

When he shows you, you smile - “There’s a movie too! We can watch it when you’re done.” You turn back to the stove, “You always have a way of reading my favorites.” 

God, the things you don’t realize. 

~

Hours later, when you’ve eaten and cleaned up the kitchen, settled onto the couch with a bowl of popcorn, he decides to try to ask you again about why you didn’t want anything to do with the things that were really important to him. 

“Be straight with me for a minute,” he says, turning onto his back so he can look up at you, his head pillowed on your thigh. “Why don’t you wanna come to my matches? Why aren’t you keen on meeting the guys? You don’t have to but I want a reason. It’s important to me. They’re important to me. You're important to me.” 

You look startled at his admission but quickly recover, shaking your head as you press your fingers down the center of his chest, tracing slowly back up to his shoulder, across his collarbone. He bites down the urge to say something about just how much you liked to touch him.  

“Can you try?” He pleads. 

You pause, and Benny waits, even though he’s never really been a patient person. But for you, he'll try.

“I’ve just never been good at being close to people, Ben. It’s hard for me not to feel like the rug is going to be ripped out from under me,” you card your hands through his hair. “I moved here alone. I’m always alone. It’s easier not to be so attached.” 

“You think I’m gonna cut and run?” 

You don’t answer for a moment and the only sound is that of the movie playing quietly on the TV that neither of you have paid attention to in a while. “No,” you say eventually, carefully. “You aren’t one to abandon your friends.”

Benny, he tries to understand, what that meant you thought about him, that you don't want to come any closer than you already are. 

Friends. 

He would have to be okay with that. 

But it’s late and he’s tired and your hands feel nice when they thread through his hair. “I kept the pop-it,” he says suddenly. “I know I ribbed you about it but I kept it and it helps. It’s actually starting to fuckin’ fall apart because I use it all the time.” 

He uses it when he reads your books, so his hands are busy. 

“I’ll get you a new one,” you say, like the fact you would means nothing. 

~

You barrel through the front door of the bar, the crash of music and laughter and pool balls clacking together assaulting your already delicate ears, a headache lingering from the day you’ve had. 

Benny hadn’t come in during your afternoon shift and you’d been stuck alone with Victor for a majority of that time, your pleas for help via texts to Benny going unanswered. 

“Thanks for coming back in,” John says when you meet him at the bar. “Some fucking fight just let out and Sal’s is closed tonight so we got their usual folks too. Promise this is a one time thing,” he adds.  

“No problem,” you say with a smile, swinging through the office door to drop your stuff and clock in. You catch sight of Victor as you pass back through the kitchen but avoid his gaze. “Hey, where d’you want me? Bar? Floor?” You ask John when you meet him back by the bar, tying your apron around your waist. 

“I need you to take those tables over there,” he points to the far corner. “They haven’t been served yet.” 

You nod and cross the bar, trying not to think about Benny, about how goddamned much you’d missed him and how any effort you’d made not to let him worm too closely into your heart had been severely thwarted. 

Your Benny hangover coupled with the amount of time you’d been forced to spend with Victor alone has you on edge, tired and unhappy. 

You take care of the couple sitting quietly together and a group of chatty girls before you move on to your last table, a group of guys. One of them, a blond with close cropped hair and a beard, looks strangely familiar. He tilts his head at you, like he knows you too and can’t place you. 

Ignoring the feeling, you plaster a smile to your face, the pounding at the base of your skull increasing in intensity. 

“Hey, sorry for the wait,” you start, laying down some napkins. “We’re a little bit understaffed tonight. What can I get for you?”

One of them, a man with fathomless, dark eyes and gray streaked brown curls, opens his mouth when a familiar voice says your name. 

You start to turn just as Benny slams into you from behind, knocking the breath out of you. You jolt into the table as he wraps an arm across your chest, one of your hands coming up to hook at his elbow, to steady yourself. “Benny? What are you doing here?” You turn your head to find him grinning widely down at you, beaming at you like a ray of sunshine, happy to see you beyond what is reasonable. 

“Could ask you the same thing, honey. Weren’t you here all afternoon?” 

“I was but we’re understaffed so I got pulled back in. What are you doing here?” You ask again. 

Benny’s face is a masterpiece of pain. He’s bruised up again, a scarlet cut above his cheek and near the line of his jaw, violent violet bruises starting to turn a painful shade of black and green. “Celebrating. I fuckin’ won tonight! Knockout within a minute,” he crows, looking proud. “And our usual place was closed.” 

And John’s words come back to you - some fucking fight just let out and Sal’s is closed tonight so we got their usual folks too. “Congratulations,” you say softly, realizing who the people at the table must be, realizing why Benny had been absent that afternoon.

Normally he told you when you had a fight but you don’t remember him saying anything about this one. He always made a point to invite you, even if he knew you’d say no.

Embarrassment pools in your belly, realizing how long you’ve been letting him hold you, how you’ve only looked into his eyes, his grip so comfortable to you that you hadn’t noticed.  

You frown as Benny finally releases you to sit down beside the man who looked familiar to you before. You suppose he looks familiar because he is. He can be no one else but Benny’s brother, Will. “I take it you’re who Benny’s been spending every minute with.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” you try to joke, trying not to bolt away from the lot of them, as the careful separation in your mind between your Benny and Benny’s real life crashes down. “Ben’s got so many friends.” 

“Not friends like you though,” says the man with those dark eyes, something unreadable brewing in his expression, his voice like ice. Benny shoots him a look that says fuck off. 

Ben introduces you by name and then says, “My brother, Will.” He slaps the blond man he’d slid into the booth next to on the back. “Santiago,” he points to the salt and pepper haired man and then the man with the baseball cap pulled low over his eyes, “and Frankie. Better known as Pope and Fish.” 

“Nice to meet you,” you manage to say. “I’ve heard a lot about you.” 

“So have we,” Santiago says, his tone still crisp. “Nice to know Ben hasn’t been hallucinating you these past few months.” 

You suddenly feel like a mouse caught in a trap as you glance at each of them, the hardness in their gazes as they look back at you. 

Of course they wouldn’t be keen on you. Benny is like their little brother and you’ve been avoiding what is essentially his family for months, for no good reason at all, at least not in a way that made sense to anyone but you, though Benny had tried to understand. 

Your throat tightens and you open your mouth to respond when Benny cuts in, loud and gruff as he always is, “Fuck off, Pope. Leave her alone. Tell her what you want so she can get back to it.” 

You glance at them apologetically, avoiding looking at Ben, ignoring his outburst. “Beers? First round is on me.” 

“You don’t haveta do that, sweetheart-,” Benny starts, his voice infinitely gentler when he addresses you. 

“Yeah, I do,” you interrupt him. “Anything else?” 

A chorus of no’s resound and you nod without looking at any of them before briskly walking away. Your hands are shaking as you pour the beers, deciding at the last second to put in for a plate of nachos too. You’d hoped to avoid them, but you should have known better, that in a town so small you’d be bound to run into them at one point or another. 

You just don’t want it to hurt when Benny moves on, or for it to at least be as painless as possible.

But that’s not what it looked like to them, not what it looked like to Benny.

Fuck, he must think you don’t give a shit about him, not really. 

It wasn't like it fucking mattered anyways, the hurt is coming for you whether you let the closest parts of his life sink into yours or not. 

Benny has charmed his way inside you, his friendship like the serrated edge of a knife, cutting deeper and deeper until removing it would be to sentence you to death. 

You swipe at your eyes though you aren't in danger of tears and shuffle the beers over on your tray for the nachos before starting back across the bar. You’ve halfway there, paused near one of the wooden support beams so a large group can pass you on the crowded floor when Victor stops by you, awkwardly leaning against the pole and blocking your way. When the group has passed, drunkenly shouting their way out of the bar you grit out, “What do you want?” You're irritated that you’ve had to spend so much time with him today, and that he’s still bothering you.

“Miller’s here,” he says, an accusation in his voice, like you personally invited Benny just to piss him off. Jealousy drips off him. “And you got his table.” Like you'd plotted that too.

“Yep. Won his match. They’re here to celebrate,” you start to move away when Victor leans into your free arm and forces your shoulder back against the beam. 

Your breath flutters in your chest as you look up to meet his eyes. “What’s your problem, huh? Why do you hate me so much?” 

“You know why. You talk shit about my best friend,” you snarl up at him, something feral rising up in you and chasing away the calm you were known for.

But Victor has pushed you to your limit over the last couple months and you can see the glee in his eyes at getting a rise out of you. You were rapidly approaching your breaking point with him.

He barks out a loud laugh, and it's not pleasant the way Benny’s is. A couple of people turn to look at you but quickly go back to their own conversations. You squirm, trying to get your shoulder out from under his weight. An ache has started to creep up your arm. 

“Best friend. Right. Like Miller wants anything but to fuck you. You’re just a conquest, sweetheart.” 

“Fuck you,” you say lowly, not willing to admit how that bites at you, how that is exactly what you’re afraid of. 

Victor clocks it though, sees the break in your expression that confirms his accusation. “Haven’t put out yet have you? He’ll get bored eventually,” he says, finally pulling his weight off of yours, an ache twisting down to your wrist. “He’s always been that way. I know you’re new to this town but trust me, he tricks everyone with the golden retriever act. Hell, just fucking look at him. Military, Special Ops, can’t stop fighting to save his life. Always in trouble and looks to his brother to tell him up from down.” 

You can’t help it, you glance over at their table, Victor’s breath hot on your cheek when he leans in to whisper. “Not exactly stable. Never has been. How long til he does something like that to you?” 

Benny and his friends are staring at you across the dark bar. Will has a hand on Benny’s arm, keeping him in place, his fingers white with the effort.

“See, even now he’s itching for blood.” 

You wrinkle your nose and turn your face into his, refusing to look away from Victor’s beady eyes. You’re so close your noses almost touch, but you refuse to back down. You bare your teeth at him and grit out, “Another word. One more word against him, and Ben will be the least of your problems. You think Benny’s temper is bad? You’ve been fuckin' trying me all day and I got nothin’ to lose.”

You step closer and grip your tray in both hands to shove into his stomach hard. The glasses rattle but don’t fall. He makes a soft oof sound but doesn't look away, doesn’t back down.  

It takes a minute but his eyes drop and he steps back. “You’ll find out the hard way what kind of fucking people they are. All of them.” 

The fucker can’t even look you in the eyes as he says it. 

You roll your eyes and move away. “Fuck you, coward.” 

Your hands are shaking again, but for a completely different reason as you approach the table. 

Victor’s starting to get bold, and it's starting to worry you. How long until his obsession with you and your relationship to Benny becomes unhinged? It already kind of is, the way he follows you and watches you, the way he’s been trying to turn you against Ben for months now, the touches and the passing remarks - it's all headed to something unsafe. 

For all Victor’s talk, Benny has never made your shoulder ache, has never crowded you or tried to intimidate you or made you uncomfortable. 

No, it's not Benny you have to worry about. 

You pass the beers out, the plate of nachos, when you stop at the boy’s table. “All on me,” you say more cheerfully than you feel, unconsciously stepping closer to Benny where he sits at the end of the booth, pressing the back of your hand into his bicep, reassuring yourself that he’s there and real. “Yell if you need something else, okay?” 

“Hey,” It's Will’s voice that stops you from pulling away. “You okay?” 

You glance around as Benny covers your hand with one of his and squeezes your fingers reassuringly, gaze turned toward the bar, eyes tracking something.

“Yeah,” you confirm. “What, Victor? He’s a piece of shit but he’s harmless,” you say with more conviction than you feel. 

“Hell of a stare you got,” Santiago says, sounding impressed.

Frankie chuckles and meets your eyes, “Yeah, wouldn’t want you lookin’ at me like that.”

And fuck, you wonder if they heard. If Victor’s voice could have traveled that far. You pull away from Benny’s hand when he tries to tangle your fingers together and say, “Well, I just get protective sometimes.” 

You tuck your tray under your arm and turn to walk away when Benny tugs you back, “Sure you’re okay?” 

“Golden,” you answer with a smile but he doesn’t look convinced.

And when you glance at the others, you know they overheard you and Victor, because all hostility is gone. They watched you go toe to toe with an asshole for Benny, and now they know they’re missing some vital piece of the picture as to why you hadn't been around, the thing that really kept you away from them and Benny’s matches. 

And they’re too skilled, too observant, not to pinpoint exactly what it is. 

Benny might not know you’re in love with him, but his buddies suddenly do. 

~

Victor continues to bother you throughout the night but you try not to let it affect you, you try to stay calm despite your earlier threat, if only so there won’t be a scene and Benny can enjoy his win. 

The boys, when you stop by their table, have warmed to you entirely. They joke with you, rib you just like Benny does, and the fold you’ve been trying to avoid being dragged into has engulfed you in seconds. 

So when the bar finally clears out and their table is the only one left, Frankie gestures you in. “Sit down here for a minute, you’ve been workin' your ass off.” 

“Wasn’t too bad,” you say, slipping into the booth next to Benny and Will. “But it's definitely the busiest this place has ever been.” 

“So how come you don’t come to the fights?” Santiago asks.  

“Pope-,” 

“Maybe you guys intimidate me,” you say with a shrug of your shoulder. “I know how important you are to Benny.” You nudge an elbow into Ben’s ribs, “I’m just some waitress.” 

They laugh and you feel better, like maybe they might even like you. Benny scoffs loudly at your declaration, and you kick yourself for never meeting them before. Even if you lost Benny, you don’t want to hurt him now. “Just some waitress?” Benny rolls his eyes. “Honey, fuck off,” he says fondly. 

“So tell us how you ended up in this shithole town,” Will says. “And how you got this one so whipped,” he locks an arm around Benny’s shoulders. 

Benny doesn’t try to deny it, looks a little bit smug, almost happy at the accusation.

“I’m from a small town, different one, did the big city thing, fucking hated it. Ended up here.” You ignore the other question, not really sure how to answer it anyways, but you don’t comment when Ben drapes his arm across the top of the booth behind you.  

“Not back home?” Frankie asks you. 

“No one at home to go back to,” you say, revealing more than maybe you should. “Found I liked the company here anyways.” 

The conversation rolls along easily from there. They’re funny and loud and affectionate with each other in a way that makes your heart hurt. There’s a closeness there that makes you happy, and jealous that you're witnessing so rare a love and bond.  

And it makes you feel stupid, because they’re so welcoming to you, they tug you into the center of them and it feels like you’ve always belonged.

Eventually, John calls you away from the boys, wiping his hands on a dish towel - the exact opposite of his son, cordial and funny and kind. 

You aren’t sure what happened to Victor to make him so bitter, if he really just has a problem with you and Benny in particular.

“We should be heading out anyways,” Frankie says, laboring to his feet after Santi stands. 

You get hugs from all of them, a kiss to your brow from Benny. “We still on for tomorrow?” 

Saturday morning fishing, you would never miss it. “‘Course, always.” 

“And we aren’t invited?” 

“How about beers at Sal’s tomorrow instead?” you offer, not willing to give away your morning alone with Benny.

Santi and Will share a look that Ben doesn’t see, too busy examining the ridge of your shoulder where a bruise is forming from being locked against the beam.

“Sure, we can get you back for the beers tonight,” Will says, one big hand pressing between your shoulder blades briefly. 

“No-,” 

“Yeah, we are,” Santi says. “We’ll see you tomorrow.” 

You watch them file out, Benny turning to hug you hard, breath pressed out of your lungs at the intensity. “Fuck. Thank you,” he says. “For putting up with them.” 

“They’re nice.” 

“Glad you met ‘em? They’re meatheads but they mean well.” 

“They do and I am.”

~

Benny is almost to his jeep when he decides to wait for you. He wants to be with you, to ride along to your place and sleep on your couch like he has so many times before - so he can see you grouchy and soft in the morning sunshine before you get ready, drink coffee with you at your kitchen table. 

God, he’s going fucking soft. 

Domestic. 

It feels weird but right.

He waits along the side of the building where the back deck of the bar wraps around to the front stairs, the lights that normally line the walkway already out. 

He watches John leave, entrusting closing to you and Victor. 

Quiet descends, the chirp of the crickets loud and sweet, the sounds of safety and home, when he hears a crash. 

Then -

“-fucking stupid. What do you see in him?” 

“Why the fuck do you care, Vic? It’s not like I would want you, if I didn’t want Ben.” 

His brain statics, not sure he heard right. You want him? Is that what you implied?

“And what’s so fucking wrong with me, huh?” 

You snarl back, “Fuck. Really? You’re an asshole and judgemental.” 

“It’s not judgement if it's right. Call it like I see it. Ben Miller is -,”  

He doesn’t get to hear what he is. “You’re crazy,” he hears you shriek. “Fucking crazy! Even if he was everything you claim, I still wouldn’t want you!”  

A rage builds in Benny, and he’s about to move, to come to your aid, when Victor starts muttering lowly again - the conversation seems to peter out into something civil. 

Then - the sound of something slamming, a rattling of drink glasses, and low talking. “Fuck off,” you growl suddenly. “You know how fucking brilliant you have to be to make it to where he did? Where all of them did?” 

“Luck. And brawn and brother that would do anything for him.” 

You let out a disbelieving laugh, “I quit. You can finish closing alone. If your dad asks why I fucking quit, you can explain it to him.” 

The front door flies open, smacking back into the wood paneled wall as you go trudging down the steps and across the gravel of the lot. 

Victor follows you, catches up to you and jerks you to a halt. “Just give me a chance,” he pleads with you. “One chance. I can make you forget about him. You’ll see what you’re missing.” 

“No,” you say. “You couldn’t. No one can.” 

Benny’s vision goes red as the hand around your arm tightens, but he freezes when Victor continues, speaking something that Benny is afraid is almost uncomfortably close to the truth of his life. 

“He’s a fuck up and a loser and would have been in jail for something stupid years ago if he didn’t have his brother trailing him around and forcing him to make something of himself. It’s a good thing that kid got shoved into the military because he never would have made it otherwise. You’re just going to let him drag you down too.” 

“Shut up.” 

“I’m serious, you’re pining away after someone that’s never gonna measure up to you. You’re brilliant. He could barely fucking read in high school.” 

You jerk out of Victor’s grip, shaking your head and stalking across the parking lot, but he follows you.

Under normal circumstances, Benny would have been across the lot and in that motherfucker’s face in 5 seconds flat, but he can’t move, he’s frozen, watching the tension in your shoulders knot up. 

God, he’s waiting for you to agree, to turn and say that he’s right.

But you don’t, you keep moving. And when Victor touches you again, snags at your elbow, every bit of restraint he has dries up. 

He lurches away from the wall and stalks after the pair of you. He saw the bruise on your shoulder, he knows that Victor is the worst kind of dangerous to you - that and you’re his fucking girl. 

No one is gonna do fuckin’ shit to you without reprecussions. 

He’s nearly reached you when -

You turn and land an elbow into Victor’s stomach, he crumbles, curves at the waist and you bring a knee up to crack into his face. He goes sprawling backwards onto his ass as you tower over him with your shoulders thrown back. 

God, that was fucking hot.

He’s so proud of you, impressed with the absolute fury contorting your features. 

His girl, a fighter. 

Of course you fucking are. You’re his. 

And he likes this mean streak in you, likes the feral protectiveness that bubbled up. 

“Fuck you,” you say and he’s never heard such venom in your voice, such protective laced violence. You glance at him suddenly, looking startled to find him standing there before you lean over Victor’s crumpled, prone form. “I warned you Ben’s temper wasn’t the one you had to worry about, didn’t I? You don’t know a goddamn thing about him. Or me. And if you ever say another word against him in my presence, you’ll get much worse than a bloody nose. Understand?” 

“What’s your fuckin’ problem, bitch?” Victor’s back is still to Benny, has no idea that he’s there. 

Benny reaches down and hauls him up by the back of his shirt, gets the satisfaction of seeing him go white with fear, of hearing a squeak pass his lips in surprise. “Just makin’ sure you’re listening to the lady,” he says, jerking him roughly into place before smoothing Victor’s shirt out carefully. He gestures to you and crosses his arms, “Go on, sweetheart. Tell him.”

You grit your teeth at him, and Benny decides yeah, he really likes you mean. “I'm a bitch, huh? Because I won’t fuck you? Fuck off. I asked you a question - do you fuckin’ understand or don’t you?” 

“Yeah, shit, I got it. You want to be Miller’s special girl so bad it makes you look stupid. He’s not the settling type, babe.” He snaps at you, refusing to acknowledge Benny. 

“Damn, so much fucking confidence for someone who’s about to have his ass handed to him,” Benny growls. 

“Fuck you, Miller, like you even need the excuse. You aren’t gonna do shit. Neutered after all these years, huh? Contained to a cage.” 

Victor yanks out of his grasp and spits at your feet before turning to walk away. But he couldn’t have really expected to do something like that and get away with it.

Running on autopilot and adrenaline and rage - Benny yanks him back by the collar of his shirt and breaks his knuckles against his teeth, breaks the nose that you weakened with your knee. Victor falls again and Benny picks him up by the front of his shirt, slams him into the nearest car.

He brings his mouth to Victor’s ear, feels the tremble and shake of fear. “Ever touch her again, speak to her again - hell, even look at her - I’ll fucking kill you. Got it?” And then lowly, barely a whisper, "She's mine."  

He drops Vic to the ground, watches him stumble back and skitter away. 

As soon as he’s rounded the corner to the back deck of the bar, Benny turns and wraps his arms around you in a crushing hug, and doesn’t let go even when you tap your fingers against his spine. 

“Benny, easy,” you breathe out but you cling onto him harder, and Benny realizes how shaken you are, how scary it must have been to have a man follow you across a dark parking lot. “What are you still doing here?” 

“Waitin’ on you, honey. Good thing too, though I think you had it handled. Hell of a swing you got.” 

He finally lets you go, your eyes going to his bloody hand and you sigh. “God, we’re both gonna have assault charges," you murmur, tracing your thumb over the broken skin.

“He ain’t gonna say shit. He’s gonna tell everybody he fucked you and went toe to toe with me over it. He’s a liar and little bitch,” Benny says, curling his arm around your waist, his blood settling when you lean into him, hand against his chest. “He’s not going to fuck with you anymore.” 

You peer up at him, your gaze still holding a lingering fear, “Thanks for having my back. You coming home with me?”

He nods and you gesture him around the side of your SUV.

When you’re both settled, you turn your keys in the ignition and the engine rumbles to life, but you don’t pull out. You turn and stare at him through the dark, the AC wafting his hair gently. “What?”

“Did you mean that?” 

“What?” 

“You said - you said she’s mine. Was that just some macho bullshit or did you mean it?”

Fuck.

He licks his lips, thinks about lying, when he shakes his head, looks down, and sniffs. He’s tired of pretending. “Yeah. I meant it.” 

It immediately feels like a mistake to say it, and the now familiar icy clutch of panic closes a fist over his lungs, like he can’t breathe, like you are going to tell him to fuck right off. 

Like you’re going to yank the rug right out from under him. 

He’s done losing constants. He’s done losing the world around him for nothing. 

His lungs seize and he feels that familiar stupidity, what a stupid fucking thing to panic over - not killing, not gun shots, not fighting - but losing people. 

“Hey,” you say, pressing a steadying hand to his arm. “It’s okay. What’s got you bothered?” 

He reminds himself that you already know about the panic even if it’s never been directly addressed, and it hasn’t been too much for you yet. 

“You’ve -,” it comes out in a gasp and so he stops, takes a minute to breathe, to ground himself against your fingers when they tangle with his. “You keep batting me back, honey. It’s okay. Just don’t leave. I meant it but it doesn't have to mean anything to you.” 

“You think I’m gonna leave?” You ask quietly, “Why? I’m always thinkin’ the same thing about you, Benny.”

His head thumps back against the headrest. “Something’s wrong with me,” he says. “Don’t know what.” One hand rubbing at his chest like it might help the ache ease. 

~

You give Benny a moment to collect himself, for his breathing to even out, for the shake in his hands that he normally tries not to let you see to stop. 

“When did it start?” 

“We - fucked up mission in - we lost someone. Ever since it's like - I start thinkin’ I’m gonna lose everyone, everything. Got better since I met you.” He glances at you, shakes his head. “Comes and goes, I guess. But anytime it feels like something’s changing or someone is pulling back it’s like - fuck - it’s like I can’t stop seeing blood.” 

“You think you’re gonna lose me?” 

Benny laughs, his hyena-like wild laugh that you’ve come to love more than anything, “Yeah. Yeah, all the time,” he says. “You have a way of just - you keep knocking me back. You don’t want anything to do with what’s important to me - like you don’t really want anything to do with me and -,” 

“Benny you aren’t exactly…you aren’t someone who stays. But you stay with your friends.” You squeeze his fingers, “I would rather be your friend - so I can keep you.” 

He stares at you, wide blue eyes tracking your every minute move, adding up what you just said in his mind. You look away from his eyes. “You have a couple things you keep close - I don’t fit into that. And I’ve lost people before. I’m alone and I don’t want to keep being that way. I would rather keep you like this.”

“Yeah, sweetheart,” he says. “And what if that’s bullshit? You fit in just fine. Too well maybe. You never said shit because you thought what? I’m feeling casual about you?” He huffs out a sigh. “I spend every goddamn free second I have with you, or thinking about you. Not just anyone I’d start reading for. You know what it took for me to find that fucking book for you? God it was worse than chasing down fugitives.” 

You scoff dismissively, not willing to believe yourself special. You’ve heard that one before. “Yeah, I know how guys like you are, hon. I know.”

“The fuck’s that mean?” He says, not really a question, turning fully to you, pushing you back into your seat, hands lifting to frame your face, large and hot and calloused against your skin. “Lemme tell you something, honey, it only took me a couple hours to know you weren’t something I’d be able to forget.” His eyes flick over your face, “Nah. Never. You are one of my constants.” 

“Oh yeah? And what makes me so special?” You say with a roll of your eyes. 

“Well for one you just punched the shit out of someone for me,” he says. “And just about everything else. Everything we get up to. We compliment each other. You understand me. We have fun together and you never tell me to be quiet even when I probably fuckin’ should be. You’re my best friend too.” 

You reach up and hook one hand against his wrist, trace your thumb over the veins there, softening a bit. “Serious?”

“Yeah. Fuck, yes.” 

You nod and move your other hand to his chest. “You punched the shit out of someone for me too.” 

“Shoulda happened a long time ago.” 

You smile at that and then frown. “You should talk to Will. About the panic attacks. It’s okay that you’re going through something. We’re here for you. But no one’s going anywhere. Not me, not anyone.” 

“I’m not either,” he says, ignoring your suggestion for the moment, clearly not wanting to think about the panic attacks or his brother. “I’m not going anywhere either. Trust that.” 

And you do. 

Benny’s never lied to you and he certainly isn’t cruel. You tug him closer, press your forehead to his and breathe him in until he seems like he’s back to himself. 

The closeness is familiar. It doesn’t feel strange to be wrapped up in him like this, you and Benny are this close all the time and it’s always felt right, natural. 

“You want me, babe,” he says suddenly, only ruining the moment slightly, and you hear the grin in his voice.

“Fuck off.”

“I heard you. I know you do. S’okay, I want you too.”

When his breath ghosts over your lips and your breathing hitches hard, he surges forward to kiss you roughly. 

Its a desperate kiss, one that sears into you, that lights your veins on fire. You push your hands into silky wheat hair, tugging at the strands until Benny shoves back the center console and drags you into his lap, presses you close and tight, his heartbeat matching yours. It’s a little awkward, your jaw smacking into his nose, Benny grunting before you find a good position, giggling the whole time before he’s kissing you again, the heat of him so good around you. 

Broad hands splay over your back, trace the line of your spine as you push your hand inside the collar of his worn shirt. 

But just as quickly it softens and Benny Miller is smiling into you so hard he can’t really kiss you properly. 

“Been waitin’ for this so long,” he says, his mouth brushing yours with every word. You jerk him forward by the back of his neck, pressing him as close as you can, laughing into him. 

“Have ya?”

“Fuck yeah,” he murmurs, hissing when you press your thumb into one of his bruises, a bad habit you don't want to quit. “Yeah, shit, I have been. Stupid gorgeous and puts up with my shit.”  

You grin, “Sure do, pretty boy.” 

He doesn’t correct you, just fastens those cornflower blue eyes on you and asks, “So you’ll be at my next match?”

“‘Course. Can’t wait to see you get your ass handed to you.” You pull back to stroke his cheek, trace a thumb over his bottom lip. 

He kisses you again and this time it’s deep and controlled and so good, familiar and unexpected rolled into one. 

Feels like home, like there’s solid ground beneath you for once. 

[painted-bees]

I plan on visiting Cortes Island next week. Have you ever been (I assume you have) and if so are there any places you'd recommend visiting? Also any Hi-Note specific places or does it just vaguely take place somewhere on the island (or a specific but private location)?

Oh my god, if it's not weird to ask, could you take some photos of the place for me? No people, just the area...I haven't been there in literal decades and I have wondered how it has developed.

I definitely recommend combing smelt bay at low tide. There is so much sea life in the tidal pools and under the rocks! And I dunno if you're still allowed to take oysters off the beach for personal consuption[dinner] but if you are, take advantage of it! If you see a conspicuous boulder there that is dry during low tide but half deep in water during the high tide, I use to sit on it for hours and watch the tide come in. I gave that little past time to Margie, as well.

There used to be a house on the bay that sold ice cream from the porch, with a big sign that advertised it was open from sunrise to sunset. I really doubt it's there anymore--the couple that lived there were already old when I was there.

Hague Lake is a really lovely fresh water beach to swim during the hot days, there's a big rock/teeny island in the center of it that you can jump off of. Whaletown and Squirrel Cove will cover your basic amenities/shopping needs haha

There use to be a castle...that a guy built and allowed folks to walk through...I wonder if that's still a thing. There were also frequently held little fairs and festivals hosted by locals and such that were fun to attend, with good food. The hiking trails are beautiful also!!

Again, I don't know how much has changed! Please tell me how it is..!

In the story, the Hi-Note Trio lives near smelt bay on a little road called Hayes Road...The side of the road was lined with blackberry shrubs that we use to pick berries from and make jam with. Smelt Bay, within walking distance from Hayes road, is where Margie gets swept out to sea and is the beach where she meets cortes on the stony shore. Potlatch Road is where Raf had found her shambling back home in a briney, sea-battered daze...

The grassy area by smelt bay is where Raf, Margie, and Cortes would often go to sit down and maybe jam a little if the weather permited.

my image of it is a very lush, quiet island, with very, sparse traffic, hugely disconnected from the mainland. It used to be safe to hitchhike around the island, but I could not recommend it now without knowing its current character.

Oh, I am really happy haha I hope you like it there!! I hope it is not too different from what I describe--but I wouldn't begrudge it if it is. All things change.

[creedslove]

Hello baby!

What if our favorite cowboy organizes a date with his sugar, the man literally prepares everything alone or the best he can. He organizes everything in his ranch.

It was the first time he was so excited to receive her, prepared a meal, get ready, once he finally picked her up, he was like:

"Hell, sugar... you look so goddamn precious!"

Whisky being literally being a pleaser to his sugar, he teached her how to ride one of his favourites horses, his home, he doesn't know what else to do for her.

I hope you feel much better! I send you a big hug! ✨

Agent Whiskey (Jack Daniels) x f!reader

A/N: hi bestie!!! I love this so so so so much, this is such Agent Whiskey coded because he is a people's pleasure, and above all, he's a sugar pleaser, which means he'll please his sugar until the day he dies

• Whiskey is the king of date: he never lacks ideas, plans or any other thing to take his sugar on a date, he's got a wide range of creativity and money that helps a lot, so it's just a matter of picking up the mood for the day not to overdo himself

• he's definitely the kind of man who would drive you across town just so you can grab that one pie you had when you were PMSing years ago and you never forgot, or he would book you tickets for a weekend getaway if you complain about stress at work and stuff like that

• but even if he's great at pleasing, he's still a romantic at heart, so the best kinds of dates in his opinion, are the ranch dates, because he loves his ranch, it's a huge part of who he is, at his ranch, he's not just the tacky cowboy who talks funny and isn't afraid to pick a fight at places, but instead, he's himself, not Whiskey, just Jack, with his beautiful green fields, his horses, his simple life and his southern manners

• so you can expect a real weekend, because the cowboy isn't just going to invite you for a day, you're going to at least spend the night, have the whole ranch experience, all you gotta do is to say yes to it and he'll make it happen

• and he's a gentleman, let's not forget about that, so even if you insist you can drive to his ranch, chances are you aren't because he'll make sure to pick you up with his Bronco, he just wants you to take on a ride in it because he loves that car, it's pretty, comfortable, it's got status, and he's excited to be seen driving around with you in the passenger seat, just as he's excited to see you wearing your cute sunglasses as your hair flies loose at the window

• that if he doesn't gift you a cowboy hat the minute he picks you up, because yeah, he is gonna buy you a stetson, he just doesn't know when he's gonna give it to you, so why not in the beginning of the adventure, anyway?!

• and let me tell you: that cowboy's ranch is simply gorgeous! He will be so proud and happy to show you around, knowing exactly where to take you and what to do with you there, giving you a tour through the main house that's big and comfortable af obviously and then taking you to the stables so you can see the animals and play with them and all of them

• now, hear me: he loves horses, he's been riding them forever so if you know how to ride them, he will be glad to do so with your company, but if you don't, Jack will be thrilled to teach you from the very beginning, from how to actually get on the horse, to where to hold it and gentle guide it until you are feeling safe

• if the weather is hot enough, you can also expect him to take you swimming out at the lake, because let's face it: do you think Jack Daniels didn't grow up swimming in those waters around the ranch? He knows all the nice and pretty spots to take girls by the way, and you won't be different at all

• in the evening, you can expect him to throw a barbecue or just smoke some meat, but the thing is: it's gonna be outside, it's dark, warm and the lights will be on, making the ranch look so nice, although it's a little bit empty too, but it's a good thing since it's just the two of you spending time together; he'll serve you appetizers, the main dish, and the best liquor Statesman is capable of producing

• and yeah, he will roast marshmallows by the fire and tell you ghost stories about that land as if you two were in a summer camp together, and even if you know there's a big fat chance he's lying, you will still feel slight shivers down your spine and you will cling to him just a little bit tighter once the howling wind blows

• but once you two get back inside, it's sweet sweet love making with a sugar coated cowboy, where you can't have enough of him and he can't get enough of you, loving your body all night long and of course he'll greet you in the morning with breakfast in bed because he's a romantic at heart

• so chances are, you're gonna spend the morning in bed, enjoying the big breakfast and the cowboy's sugar and in the afternoon, he's definitely taking you for a picnic, with everything you're entitled to: a beautiful basket, a nice plaid towel, mini sandwiches and cake, all he wants is to spoil you

• watching the sunset together as you enjoy this romantic time is great, but as soon as the sun sets, he's gonna give you puppy eyes, asking you to stay the night once more, not ready to let you go home just yet 🥺❤️

____

[sadhours]

Wicked Sensation

part eleven // billy hargrove x reader

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven | part twelve | part thirteen | part fourteen | part fifteen | part sixteen | part seventeen

a/n: i am sorry in advance.

word count: 6.4k

warnings: 18+ minors dni, homophobia, smut, dirty talk, rough sex, body fluids, mentions of death, cheating.

taglist(i love you all): @blue-eyed-lion @bbyhargrove @briefmongerfishzonk-blog @sweet-villain @actuallyspencerreid @trapistani

Wearing your brand new hot pink convertible strap swim suit underwear a pair of denim shorts, you grab your sandals and head into the kitchen to be greeted by your dad and brother. They’re making sandwiches for their day at the lake, fishing gear lined up by the door.

“Since when did you become such a fan of swimming?” your dad asks, packing the lunchbox on the counter.

“Since her boyfriend started working as a lifeguard,” your brother chimes.

It was true, before Billy got the job at Hawkin’s Community Pool you’d only swim when visiting your family in Florida. Now, whenever you had a day off from work when Billy didn’t, you were at the pool. He just looked so in his element there, he was a very impressive swimmer and you’d been lucky enough to catch him teaching the smaller kids lessons. Which had you imagining having a family with him one day, when before you’d been pretty dead set on never having kids.

“God forbid I want to see my boyfriend,” you roll your eyes.

Honk, Honk.

“Oh, Steve’s here,” you smile, grabbing your bag from the kitchen table and waving goodbye.

You’d asked Steve to come because you didn’t want to just sit by yourself and Eddie wouldn’t be caught dead there. Plus, Steve was trying to date and there were plenty of ladies lounging around so you knew he didn’t mind. Walking out to his BMW, you catch Neil washing his car across the seat and hope he doesn’t think something else is going on with you and Steve. He looks to you and you wave, “Going to visit Billy and bring him some lunch!”

Neil replies with a nod and continues spraying down his car. You plunge into the front seat with a sigh, Steve pulling away from the sidewalk and making the short drive to the pool.

“You gotta tell his dad what you’re doing?” Steve asks, sunglasses pushed up to the bridge of his nose.

You shake your head and check your hair in the mirror, “I just didn’t want him to think I was off cheating on his son.”

“Oh like men and women can’t be friends,” Steve counters.

“That’s what his dad thinks,” you admit and close the visor back up.

Steve finds you guys a spot, luckily where Billy’s post is in view. He looks absolutely irresistible in his tiny red shorts and they left little to the imagination. Your eye rake over his thighs and muscular chest, feeling yourself start to get wet just at the sight of him.

“You’re drooling,” Steve deadpans and you quickly lift your hand up to your mouth to find he wasn’t lying.

“Fuck,” you suck in, reaching in your bag and pulling out your pack of smokes.

“Jesus Christ,” Steve laughs, sitting up straighter, “As much as of prick he is I gotta admit, I’m impressed.”

Exhaling the needed smoke, you tilt your head at Steve, “Impressed with what?”

Steve motions to you and then to the row of housewives sprawled along the pool, “How he can do this and that to women. Meanwhile, I can’t even get a phone number.”

You eye the women, raising an eyebrow at Karen Wheeler putting herself on display for your boyfriend. You snort, “They all have a kid his age.”

“Hey, you’re basically a puddle at the sight of him too,” Steve points out.

“That’s so different, I’m only two months older than him and also I’ve actually seen what’s underneath those shorts,” you reason with a proud smirk.

Steve cringes, “Okay, gross. But still I don’t get it, is he just that hot? Am I not hot?”

You laugh, “You’re hot, Steve.”

“Oh,” Steve says likes just realizing something, “it’s because it’s an asshole.”

Rolling your eyes as you ash your cigarette, you don’t even want to justify Steve with an answer. When you see Billy starting to make his descent from his post, you stand up and push your shorts down your thighs and shove them into your bag before sitting back down, releasing the clip from your hair to let the natural waves fall around your shoulders.

You sat back down as you hear Steve mumble, “Pathetic.”

“When you’re getting laid again, I’ll consider your input,” you bite back with a sickeningly sweet smile.

“Ouch,” Steve gasps but you ignore him once Billy’s stepping up to you two.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he snatches the cigarette from you and glances to Steve, “King Steve.”

“Hargrove,” Steve grumbles and turns his attention elsewhere.

You turn your sweet smile to your boyfriend, “Hi, baby. How’s your day been?”

“Yelling at kids is fun,” he shrugs, sitting on the end of the lounge. “Got a lot better when I saw you.”

You lean up to peck his lips, hoping the housewives are watching. “I brought you some lunch,” you say and grin.

Billy rubs your thigh and smiles, “I’m starving.”

He’s so handsome, you think as your eyes scan his face and linger on his button nose. His skin has taken the sun nicely, a golden tan aiding in his beauty though it’s a stark contrast against your pale tone. Billy doesn’t mind though, it shows when he grins excitedly at the red marks he’s been leaving on your ass for months.

“Me too,” you say but you don’t mean it like he does.

“My lunch is an hour,” he informs you before teasing, “Think you can behave yourself until then?”

“Yes, sir,” you say meekly.

He hands the cigarette back after leaning in to kiss you a lot hungrier this time. He’s strutting off before you can catch your breath.

“That was almost vomit inducing,” Steve complains, turning his head to you. “Yes, sir?”

You laugh, feeling the heat start to diminish between your legs. “Sorry.”

Billy’s motioning you to follow him an hour later. You turn to Steve, “Go talk to a woman for God’s sake.” before you hop to your feet to follow the red shorts you can’t take your eyes off.

As you and Billy enter the break room, he glares to his male coworkers lazing around in there.

“Get back to work,” he demands and they jump up immediately, exiting the room and Billy locks the door behind him. The sound of the lock has your breath caught in your throat and you’re eager to see what he’s planned. He grabs you roughly, picking you up and dropping you onto the table. He’s at his knees in an instant, pulling your swimsuit down to your ankles. The power he has is intoxicating. The way the boys hurried out of the room at his command brought such a intense pressure to the bottom of your stomach, you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

“Such a whore, you are,” he drones between your legs, pushing them apart with his head. “Wearing this hot little number, bringing Harrington with you.”

His words are laced with venom and you feel your wetness seeping out, so close to his lips you wondered if he could tell. He sloppily kisses your thigh, his broad tongue feeling so lovely on the sensitive skin.

“Huh? You like teasing me? You love pushing my buttons and making me have no other choice but to fuck you senseless while I’m at work?” his voice is so low, it’s like music to your ears.

He slaps your thigh then, “Come on, babe, I’m not talking to an empty room, am I?”

You just whimper, unable to form a single thought as you feel his breath against your soaking pussy.

“Big girl words, now,” he warns, fingers digging into your thigh.

You gasp out, “No, Billy.”

“No?” he laughs between your legs and it’s so cruel, “Not only are you a slut but you’re a liar?”

“M’not lying,” you whine, feeling as he drags his fingertips through your folds.

“Then why are you so wet?” he hums.

You rock your hips against his touch, trying to get him to get a move on with things. You’re desperate but you’ve got some dignity, you won’t make this too easy for him.

“Answer me,” he stills his fingers and holds your hips against the table.

“Uh-uh,” you shake your head, writhing against his grip.

Billy gasps, standing up and slapping you across the face. He then grabs your jaw in his hand and squeezes your cheeks together.

He sings your name lowly, “Don’t lie.”

You whimper, seeing the way he’s straining against his teensy uniform, you think he might burst through the flimsy material.

“Fine,” you huff, “I love teasing you. I love pushing your buttons.”

“Why?” he voice is firm, serious and certain. It brings a electric jolt to your pussy and you squirm under him.

Your voice is shaky as you admit, “Because I want you to fuck me.”

He seems pleased, staring at your face under thick eyelashes with a devious smirk spreading against his lips. “You were thinking about taking my cock when he drove you here, huh?”

“Billy,” you whine out, your tip toes firmly pressed into the concrete floor.

He lets go of your face, bringing his hand to your breasts and squeezing on in his thick fingers. “You were,” he chuckles, before slapping the tit that was in his hand.

“Would you just shut up and fuck me already?” you beg, ears hot when you hear the anger in your voice.

“Brat,” he insults, but he’s pulling his shorts down to his thighs and his gorgeous, thick cock springs out. The tip is red and you can see precum leaking from it. It only makes you more impatient and you bring your feet up to the table, opening up for him even more.

“Little slut,” he coos, dragging his fingers through your glistening folds. He smears your slick on the tip of his erection before drilling it into your eager hole. You cry out and his hand grabs your mouth, muffling the sound halfway. He plows into you, his hips reckless as he gives you no time to adjust to his size.

“Billy,” you moan against his hand and it only drives him more wild. Pressing his other hand on your pubic bone while he unleashes vigorous thrusts into your heat.

You’ve never in your life felt like this during sex, he was so expertly talented with making you fall apart. He knew exactly what you wanted and when you wanted. He was also selfish, taking what he needed from you. You didn’t mind feeling absolutely used during these moments because he was so blissfully sweet when necessary. He somehow knew exactly what you needed, exactly what would turn you into a mess under his touch. It was almost supernatural.

“Good girl,” he grunts, “Look at your pussy taking my cock so God damn eagerly. You just need it so fucking bad, don’t you?”

You peer between you, watching as your pussy swallows his cock. You can feel how you’re gripping it hungrily whenever he pulls his cock back. You’d throw an absolute tantrum if he pulled it all the way out.

You groan loudly against his hand, his filthy words dragging you closer to bliss. He brings his blue eyes to yours, holding his gaze intensely. You can’t look away, you knew he’d take this all away from you if he did. His fingers move down to brush against your clit before rubbing firm circles against it and you feel your eyes cross as you struggle to maintain eye contact. He seems to like that, laughing softly as he picks up the pace of his thrusts.

“Look at you,” he coos, “So fucking dumb off my dick.”

The words pushed you over the edge, shaking against him while your orgasm thrashes through you. He was so overwhelmingly everything you wanted. He pulls back before giving you time to come down, pulling out of you, “On your knees.”

You obey, still feeling the waves of pleasure coursing through you while you fall to your knees on the concrete floor. Without having to be told to, you open your mouth and stick your tongue out. He makes a pathetic noise as he unloads on your face, completely missing the platform you’ve given him. You giggle as you feel him smear his cum all over your face, barely tasting his completion on his palm.

“You’re such a slut,” he breathes as he scans the room, looking for something to really clean you up with.

You keep your eyes closed, not wanting his cum to get in them. You’re relatively sure he’s wiped it from there but you don’t wanna risk it. Luckily, he throws what feels like towel on your face. You accept it, cleaning up his mess and dropping the towel, looking up at him with wide, innocent eyes.

“And all for you,” you counter, rising up and pulling your swimsuit over your sweaty body with the motion.

“I’m the luckiest fucker in the world,” he mumbles as he looks at the clock on the wall. He’s got fifteen minutes to eat the lunch you’d brought him.

As if reading his mind, you grab your bag and pull out the ziploc bag. He grins, sinking his teeth into it with a grateful look. You giggle as you rub his stomach, pulling his shorts up for him.

Billy says something but his mouth is full and you can’t understand him. You tilt your head as you watch him swallow.

“My dad wants you to come to dinner tonight,” he repeats and you nod, knowing you’ll have to have Steve take a detour at the mall. He’d seen you in the pink dress the past three dinners. It might be weird if you don’t start changing it up.

You nod and Billy offers you a bite of the sandwich. You accept, fingers grazing across his wrist while you bite it. He looks so satisfied you start to feel another wave of excitement course through you but you shove it down. He had to get back to work but you knew Billy was more than capable of a round two.

“Maybe we can go for a movie or something after,” you suggest, rubbing your hand against your boyfriends bicep as you watch him eat. The way he looks so cute miles away from the filthy words and actions falling from him just minutes before.

“Mm,” Billy hums happily as he looks up at you, “The drive-in.”

“St. Elmo’s Fire!” you squeal.

“Uh-uh,” Billy takes another bite of the sandwich, “Day of the Dead.”

You roll your eyes, knowing whatever you two saw didn’t matter because you’d end up in the back of the Camaro where neither of you would be paying attention. He finishes his sandwich and pats your bum before unlocking the door and walking out, you following him closely behind. Billy stops where you’d been lounging before his break, not caring that Steve is there as he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you into a heated kiss, licking into your mouth sinfully as his hands move down to grope your ass.

“See you for dinner,” he winks before getting back to work.

You hear Steve groan as you lay back on the chair, “Why don’t you two just record it and send it to every person in Hawkins?”

“Struck out, did ya?” you quip as you light up a smoke.

-

You’d bought three dresses today but the one you settle on is a simple spaghetti strap number that had a floral design resembling wallpaper. You’d styled your hair up in a ponytail, adorning your necklace with Billy’s initial for the first time in front of Neil. You’d also bought an apple crumble at the store and had transferred it to some of Mary’s Tupperware so you could pass it off as something you’d made.

Billy answers the door when you knock, leaning against its frame while he looks you up and down. “Mm, my little stepford wife looks so ravishing,” he purrs and you widen your eyes.

You know it’s gonna be a long dinner based on that, he’s gonna tease you all night. You push past him, casually saying hello to Susan in the kitchen but you don’t see any sign of her cooking. You look to Billy curiously.

“We’re going out,” he clarifies, “then after, you and I can go to the movies.”

Oh, you’d actually be seen in public like this. Which bugged you endlessly, but you look to Billy to try and rationalize why you were still upholding the charade. His smile makes you forget all about it, he laces his fingers with yours and pulls you close to him. You think he might kiss you and your cheeks flush, he was never affectionate around his dad or Susan, you didn’t think he could be.

“Who was that kid picking you up today?” Neil’s voice bellows, Billy drops your hand and steps backwards.

“Oh, that’s Steve, he’s a friend,” you say, innocently.

Neil looks at you a little intensely, making your skin crawl, “A friend?”

“He’s gay,” Billy says, a pointed look at you as a silent way to tell you to go along with it.

“And how would you know that?” Neil asks his son to which Billy replies with a scoff.

“Everyone knows it.”

You just nod, feeling your chest tighten. You hadn’t seen Neil like this before and it scared you.

“I don’t want you hanging around faggots, Billy,” he says then and Billy shrugs.

“He’s not my friend,” he looks to you and then to Susan, “Well we better start heading out if we want to make that reservation.”

The restaurant is nice, you feel underdressed and you’ve got no clue why Neil keeps looking at you. Max isn’t here which means more attention on you and Billy. Your anxiety is through the roof and you’d love nothing more than to have a glass of wine to calm your nerves. Your little lie about not drinking was really pissing you off right now. Billy seems less on edge than you, occasionally brushing his fingers against you thigh and you kick his ankle every time. Not now, you try to tell him telepathically. So either it doesn’t work or Billy likes pushing your buttons. You think the latter.

“Billy, did you buy her that necklace? I thought we talked about saving,” Neil say’s disappointedly while unfolding his napkin.

“It was my mothers,” you lie like it’s the truth, quick and without ease, “Her name was Barbara.” Another lie, her name didn’t even start with a B.

“How did she pass?” he asks.

“Neil!” Susan nudges him and you shake your head.

“No it’s okay,” no trauma, here. No, what your mother did was much worse than dying. “Car accident. She was in a coma for a few weeks but it wasn’t looking good.” You hope Neil can infer the rest.

“Oh, honey,” Susan places her hand on yours, “I’m so sorry.”

You smile awkwardly at her, “Thank you. I was just a little girl, she’d only had my brother two years before. He doesn’t remember her, much.”

That wasn’t a lie, that’s when she left and you were jealous that your brother had the luxury of not getting to know her. You feel yourself start to tear up and so you excuse yourself to the bathroom. When you walk out the door, Billy’s standing there with his hands in his pocket and he looks ashamed.

“I’m sorry, he shouldn’t ask questions like that,” he says, meekly.

You wrap your arms around him, lovingly. The thought of him being worried about you and following to make sure you were okay makes your heart swell.

“I shouldn’t lie so well,” you counter with a small laugh. Billy tightens his arms around your waist and kisses your neck.

“I know the last of that wasn’t a lie,” he whispers and you just squeeze him tighter.

You expect Neil to apologize when you get back to the table but he doesn’t. Susan keeps shooting you sympathetic glances and it’s all so ridiculous. You know Billy has the same abandonment issues with his own mother and neither of them seem to care about that. The two of you never talked about it but you think now you should. He clearly doesn’t have an outlet and you know how he feels, you can relate.

“Dessert?” the waiter offers and not one of you say yes.

You finally get to catch a breath when you get into Billy’s Camaro and let your hair down as he peels out of the parking lot.

“God, I can’t wait to get out of here,” he exhales as he flips his zippo up to light the cigarette you pull to your lips.

You giggle, “I can’t wait to see you out of here.”

“You’re a goddamn angel,” Billy says like he can’t believe it.

You lean over to kiss his cheek, feeling your heart skip a beat at the genuine compliment. He doesn’t dish them out too often but when he does you believe them. “I love you,” you confess.

“I love you, too,” he whispers, glancing at you with a slight blush to his cheeks.

Billy pays for the movie admission, parking as far away from cars as he can while still being able to see the screen well. You laugh though, asking him if it really matters.

“I actually want to see this movie, I’ll have you know,” he turns his nose up and you reach over to pinch it.

Actually watching a movie in the Camaro is difficult. You two can’t cuddle up in the front seat and you can’t see from the backseat. You can do other fun things there though. He awkwardly wraps his arms around your shoulder, the center column making it difficult to get comfortable. You turn and look at Billy, admiring his face while you hold onto the hand draped over your shoulder.

“Stop staring, you’re missing the movie,” he mumbles, his cheeks red.

You roll your eyes before turning them to the screen. But you can’t help yourself, your eyes are drawn back to his face and you start trying to count the freckles on his face. You blush when he turns his head to you, “Do I have to take you in the backseat and fuck the distraction out of you?”

Heat crawls up between your legs, his blunt and filthy words always leaving you breathless. The way he says them so confidently but so low, just meant for you.

“I mean hell, you’re so god damn needy. I already fucked your brains out once today,” he moves to grab your face, eliciting a soft whimper from your lips. Sometimes he could be so scary but it wasn’t like horror movie scary, it was like he was totally aware of the power he had over you and he knew he could do whatever the hell he pleased. And releasing yourself to such a force was incredibly terrifying but you wouldn’t change a single thing. No, Billy deserved to have control of you.

“S’not your fault you’re such a little slut, though. Can’t help but be hooked on my cock, huh?” he growls out, sliding his thumb into your mouth. You promptly wrap your lips around it and suck, dragging your tongue against the digit. “I bet you’ve already soaked through your panties. You’re a disgusting mess under that dress, aren’t you?”

You moan around his thumb, eyes wide as you gaze up at him. He pulls your dress up just enough for him to get his hand into your underwear, frowning as he feels your slick on his fingers. You suck harder on his thumb, excited at the touch.

“Fucking knew it. You’re such a filthy whore,” he purrs, leaning over to press hot, wet kisses to your neck.

You squirm at the touch, tilting your head to give him as much room as he needs. Billy slides his fingers through your folds, gathering the wetness and pulling away.

You whine but he brings his fingers to your mouth, you’re hesitant and he laughs, cruelly.

“Come on, you know you want to,” he insists.

And you do, because you know he wants you to. You shyly take his fingers in your mouth, the taste is slightly tangy but overall not bad. The satisfied, sick smirk on his face brings another wave of arousal over you.

“Get in the back, let’s makes this quick,” he says, nonchalantly.

You’re climbing over the center console before he can finish his sentence and he follows shortly after. He sits in the middle, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his pants. He pushes them down just enough to pull his cock out, bringing his palm to your mouth. “Spit,” he demands, looking at you under his eyelashes.

You do as your told, a little embarrassed by how you still can’t manage to do it as easily as he can, trails of saliva connecting from your lips to his palm. He doesn’t care though, wrapping his fingers around his cock and stroking himself. You pull your underwear down, dropping them to the floor and hooking your leg over his thighs. He helps you, guiding his thick tip against your dripping hole. He grabs onto your shoulder and pushes you down on him, stirring a gasp from you as he bottoms out. You wrap your arms around him, pressing your chests flush together and burying your face in his neck. Billy’s arms circle around your waist, holding you tight. You do most of the work, so the whole let’s make this fast thing goes out the window. You roll your hips slowly, grabbing onto his curls as you try to get as close to him as possible. You hear him groan softly, holding onto you tighter. You’re so full of love for him you have to hold back crying, not wanting to freak him out. He pulls you back, sliding his hand up to the back of your neck as he gazes up into your eyes. You smile, rolling your hips a teensy bit faster. He caresses your cheek then.

“So beautiful,” he coos, “such a pretty girl.”

Your face flushes, grinding against him harder and faster. It’s only slightly funny to you that he can call you a whore but minutes later being so sweet and loving. It’s like he can tell exactly what you want before you give him any indication. He kisses you tenderly, rolling his hips up to meet yours and you moan against his lips. After a moment though, you feel him start to soften in you and he sighs, pulling you off of him and tucking himself back in his briefs and pulling his jeans back up.Your heart stings as you wonder what you did wrong, sitting besides him and looking at him curiously.

“Was too slow,” he mumbles, “too… I don’t know.”

“Romantic?” you whisper softly, playing with the hem of your dress.

“I guess,” he says as he crawls back into the front seat.

You feel like dirt, you feel broken so easily by him and you expect him to start his car up and drive you home. You follow him the front, staring at the sky instead of the movie.

“What did I do wrong?” you ask after a beat and he groans, shifting in his seat.

“Nothing,” he says with a roll of his eyes.

“Billy, that’s never happened before,” you try to explain, “I obviously did something wrong.”

“Can you cool it?” he bites and you sigh.

“Take me home,” you demand and he listens, turning the key in the ignition and speeding out of the parking lot in a hurry.

You don’t kiss him goodbye, just storm off into your room where you slam the door. You collapse on your bed and scream into your pillow. You might be overreacting but it hurt. You felt like he was suddenly unattracted to you. You despised how much his sexual prowess of you influenced your self esteem, that was probably the worst part. That him losing the mood could make you feel so utterly hideous.

Mary knocks on your door, “Honey? You okay?”

“Go away,” you cry out but she doesn’t listen. She opens the door and sits on the bed.

“Dinner not go so well?” she asks, reaching out to stroke your hair.

“Huh? Oh. The dinner went fine,” you mumble against your pillows.

Mary sighs, “What happened?”

“I don’t want to talk to you about it,” you say.

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not gonna talk about something so personal with my dads girlfriend,” you blurt out.

Mary nods, “Okay, well right now, I’m not your dads girlfriend, I’m a shoulder to cry on.”

Damn her, you think. She’s trying to be there for you in a way no one ever was and you think you’d be a fool not to take advantage of it.

“You can’t yell at me,” you say, sitting up. “I’m eighteen and I’m on birth control.”

“So it’s about sex,” she says with a soft laugh, “I won’t yell. What happened?”

You bring your arms up to hug yourself as you look at her.

“Did Billy do something you weren’t comfortable with?” she asks, her eyes suddenly worried.

“No! No… it’s the opposite.”

“You did something Billy wasn’t comfortable with?” she cocks an eyebrow.

“I guess… we were… ya know and then he just… stopped, like he couldn’t…” you try to get the words out without feeling too awkward, your face flush.

Mary laughs again and you cover your face with your hands, “Oh, god.”

“Honey, that’s normal. Happens to the best of ‘em,” she assures you but you don’t believe her.

“No. He’s eighteen, that doesn’t happen to boys his age. I obviously did something wrong,” you mumble. “Or he just suddenly realized what a hideous beast I am.”

She shakes her head, “No, I’m sure that’s not it. Sometimes things don’t align and the mood changes. I’m sure Billy doesn’t think you’re ugly.”

“He said it was too romantic,” you admit, though he didn’t exactly say it, he just agreed when you did.

“Sounds like an eighteen year old boy to me,” she laughs again. “Don’t worry too much about it. There’ll be plenty of awkward moments ahead of you. They just happen.”

She pats the top of your head and leaves your room. The talk doesn’t settle your stomach one bit, you stand up and walk to your window. You don’t see Billy’s Camaro, but you don’t remember hearing him take off. You jump when your phone rings, walking over to pick it up.

“Hello?” you answer.

“Hi, do you like Billy Idol?” Steve’s voice on the other end kind of surprises you.

You giggle, “Do you?”

“I don’t know, but somehow I got tickets to his concert,” he says.

“In Hawkins?” you ask incredulously.

“In Indianapolis. Do you wanna go?” he asks.

You smile, “Take a four hour drive with you? Sure, I’d love to.”

“Awesome, we better leave early tomorrow then, doors are at seven,” Steve tells you an you nod along even though he can’t see you.

Then he says, “We’ll probably have to get a room since it’s a long drive and all.”

You feel your stomach twist. The last sleepover you’d had with Steve didn’t go over too well with Billy. But hey, you enjoy spending time with Steve and you can’t let Billy dictate your life.

“I’ll pack an overnight bag,” you say before hanging up.

-

Billy is standing outside when Steve pulls up. He struts over and leans into Steve’s window.

“You two gonna have another pool day?” Billy asked with a raised eyebrow. He was just about to leave for work and thought it was odd you didn’t just tag along with him.

“No,” Steve counters, “I won some tickets on the radio. We’re gonna drive up to Indianapolis.”

“What? That’s like a four hour drive,” Billy says, taking note of the duffel bag in the backseat. Then you’re stepping out the door and Billy notices your backpack hanging off your shoulder.

“Oh, hell no,” he says, stiffening up. “You’re not taking my girl to Indianapolis for a night.”

You roll your eyes, tossing your backpack in the back before placing your arms on the roof of the car. Billy takes note of your outfit, the short leather skirt, the low cut shirt and how big your hair is styled.

“It’s one night. Can you cool it?” you canary, rising Billy’s blood.

“You’re a fucking joke,” Billy scoffs, looking you square in the eye. “Go ahead and take him to California.”

He starts to walk away but you call after him, “Tickets in your name, can’t change that.”

Billy waves his hand at you, “Whatever, bitch.”

“Asshole!” you yell out as he gets in his car and peels out down the street.

Your body is tense with adrenaline and you climb into the front seat, looking at Steve dumbfounded.

“Did we just breakup?” you ask, mouth agape.

Steve winces, “Kind of sounded like it. Listen, we can call off the trip…”

“No,” you sigh. “I’ll just talk to him when we get back.”

You aren’t sure what it meant. If you did breakup. It didn’t really feel like it. You two hadn’t really fought like that before but with the night before, you wondered if Billy was searching for an excuse to break up with you. He’d been cool with you hanging out with Steve since their fight. Granted, you hadn’t spent a night in a hotel room with Steve before but still.

“It’s fine, I don’t think I’ve even heard a Billy Idol song before,” Steve replies.

You reach into your purse and produce a Billy Idol cassette. Steve deflates, grabbing the cassette and putting it in the stereo before starting your journey.

-

The concert was fun. Fun you needed to have. You and Steve get drunk, thanks to your fake ID. You stumble back into the hotel room, a sixer tucked under your arm while Steve carries your purse for you. In the excitement of the night, you successfully pushed Billy Hargrove to the very back of your mind. So much so, that when Steve’s lounging on the bed and flicking through the channels, you crawl up onto his lap. You run your fingers through his hair and giggle drunkenly.

He smiles up at you, “What’re you doing?”

“Playing with Steve The Hair Harringtons famous hair,” you snicker, tousling his hair into a mess.

He laughs softly. You share a moment, gazing into each others eyes while your hands fall to his shoulders. Without thinking, Steve’s hands inch to your waist and he’s leaning up to kiss you. But he pulls back just as quick.

“I-i’m sorry, I’m drunk,” he whispers and he looks so cute and innocent and everything opposite of Billy. You hear it in your head, You’re a fucking joke. Go ahead and take him to California. Not exactly sure why it pushes you forward in the moment but you grab onto Steve’s jaw and pull his lips back to yours. It’s desperate, clash of lips and teeth before you find the right rhythm. Once you do, you feel incredibly warm and secure. He’s gentle, tentative and it feels sweet. He’s pulling you closer, like he can’t get enough while he slides his tongue past your lips. You slide your hands down his chest and he pulls back to catch a breath, smiling wide as he looks up at you.

The two of you should stop, pretend this didn’t happen. But you can’t, and either can Steve. He presses his lips to your neck and attempts to slide his fingers into your ratted hair. Your eyes flutter shut when he licks against your sensitive skin. A moan escaping your lips when he sucks a mark there. And you don’t worry about it, allowing yourself to be a slave to this moment. Steve takes an opportunity to flip you on your back, returning his lips to yours as he hands snake up into your shirt. He squeezes you over your bra and you giggle softly as your hands snake back into his hair.

He undresses you slowly, his eyes scanning over your body as he does so. He looks at you with earnest excitement and you feel your skin erupt in goosebumps. He hums happily when he sees, his fingertips tracing your curves. His eyes continue to drink you in for a moment before he’s pulling his shirt over his head and your eyes are drawn to his chest hair. You can’t help but reach out and touch it, eyes looking up at him through your eyelashes. He smiles, moving his thumb to caress your cheek and before you know it, he’s kissing you again. It’s all so sensual it feels brand new. He doesn’t grab at you with rough hands but with attentive, sincere ones. Your head swims from it, you actually feel beautiful in the moment. When you deepen the kiss, you feel Steve’s hands journey to his jeans and he attempts to unbutton them, but it seems like he’s having a hard time so you do it for him, never breaking the kiss.

Steve pulls back, getting off the bed and wandering to his duffel bag. You feel exposed so your arms move to cover up what you can. He digs through his things and retrieves a condom, striding back over to you. You swallow the lump in your throat. Why would he even bring condoms? Was he planning on this? He kicks his jeans and briefs off before crawling back between your legs.

He smiles down at you, “Is this okay? Can I keep going?”

You nod shyly, his smile helping in dissolving the worry you’d just had. He grins wider, bringing the foil packet up to his mouth and tearing it open with his teeth. He slides the condom over his member, pressing it to your entrance.

“Are you sure?” he checks in one more time and it makes you giggle, though there’s a twinge of regret already deep in your heart.

[convexicalcrow]

There was something to be said about the way Cub was staring at the ground. Not in a bad way, or in a curious way. Sort of like... Almost staring at his feet, but also gazing at nothing in particular. He was in a strange mood, if he was honest. Too much going on as usual.

The city was quiet, which was unusual for the time of day, but the rain was probably keeping a lot of people inside. Except Cub, of course. The pavement was wet and glistening, the rain falling softly around him. He walked slowly, lost in thought.

He'd forever claim he had too many thoughts, but it was a lie. There was only ever one thought: Scar. And not in any kind of bad way either. Cub was just forever thinking about Scar. How his day was going, what he was up to, whether he'd arrive back in time for dinner, whether he'd booked another amazing date for them, the usual. Scar just occupied his thoughts. He was a man obsessed, and he was more than happy to admit it.

He smiled as he saw the park approaching. It was bright lush green today, in spite of the damp, and perhaps he fancied a walk through there today when the park would be far less busy. He crossed the street, umbrella at hand, and headed in through the gates.

It was a different place here. It was like the walls of the park insulated him from the world outside. Cub didn't mind. He felt it's what he needed. There were a couple of very committed dog walkers that he passed, but he mostly had the park to himself.

It was strange to see it empty, as if some apocalypse had happened while he was at work this morning, and now everyone had gone except for him. He stopped under trees, paused near park benches, wandered through the paths with a peaceful heart. All it needed was Scar, and his day would be perfect.

If only, though. Scar worked across town. There was no way he'd get here in time before Cub had to head back to the office. Still, Cub liked to dream. Maybe he'd bring him here on the weekend. The weather was supposed to be warming up by then. Maybe they'd take a picnic and a rug, and a thermos of coffee, and enjoy their time together. It had been a while since they'd just spend a morning together.

Cub stopped by the lake, watching all the ducks swimming by. He followed a small path over to the gazebo in the middle, where he could sit in the dry. He shook his umbrella out and sat down. He slipped out a small notebook and pen, and opened it to a new page.

Words circled through his head. That did tend to happen in a place like this. All the poetry in the world seemed to find him here. He sketched, wrote out words, tried out different phrases. The birds sung their encouragement. Every now and then, he tapped out a beat with his foot.

He took out his phone, called Scar. "Hey, Scar, can you hum a little tune for me? Something to get me inspired?"

"Oh, sure, I can do that. What kind of- oh I know where you are. Here, try this," Scar said as he began to hum.

Cub smiled. Scar always knew what he needed. The tune was bright, but cosy, reminding Cub of their ski trip last year. Not the skiing itself, but of the lodge they stayed at that was forever the warmest place they'd ever found. Big rooms, big roaring fire, and big mugs of hot cocoa. Maybe next year they'd go back again.

Cub made more sketches. Drafted more lines. Somehow, he felt it getting closer. He could see it forming in his mind. A distant roar of thunder rumbled across the sky.

"I sang a song, the thunderer roared, and all went back to hide. I sang a song below the sky, and it becan to cry." Cub paused, quietly reading the words again. "Hmm. I like the rhythm, but not the words."

He put his pen and notebook away and grabbed his umbrella. He needed to look at the flowers. That would help him find his muse.

The beds were large and well-planted with many different kinds of flowers. Not all reminded him of Scar, but some did. Really, he was looking for the right flower, and the right scent, that would give his thoughts form.

There was a beautiful rhododendron, and a big bright spray of chrysanthemums. Cub liked these. He liked how they looked in the rain, too. Maybe he took a couple of photos to share with Scar when he got home. He always loved seeing pictures of the flowers.

"I see thee in thy brightness, I see thee in thy sorrow, my friends, my flowers, shining bright, against a dark grey sky," Cub said, half-singing the words that came to mind as he saw them.

He wandered over to the roses. Traditional, of course. But his eyes were drawn to some sunflowers, whose yellow faces shone more brightly than anything else. Cub went over to them and softly brushed the petals. That was Scar right there. His sunshine. His sunflower.

"One day you'll see, that the light you shine, that you shine just for me, burns brighter and hotter than a thousand stars, giving life to all you touch. Laugh, cry, turn your face to the sun, for all that you are is beautiful," Cub murmured.

[s1lly-gh02tz]

Ok here’s me talking about spamton (my headcanons and shit)

So I do really like the theory where Spamton was thrown into the acid pool. I feel it went down like Spamton didn’t pay rent for a hot minute because of his business completely failing and eventually closing. For this point in time he was just slowly losing grasp of himself. As he kept trying and trying to get that phone call back, ever time there wasn’t a response he would just lose more and more of his sanity. Queen was friends with Spamton so obviously she gave him time. Eventually she got sick of it and lost patience, inevitably throwing him into the acid lake. I think it would be extra sad if it was one of the swatchlings or maybe even Swatch that threw him in so queen won’t get her hands dirty.

Once he went into the lake he tried swimming out but obviously failed. The acid made him really short. He was always pretty short compared to everyone but the Acid really didn’t help. The acid also like melted away his skin, eventually revealing a harder, puppet skin kinda thing if you know what I mean? His mouth sort of got stuck in a nutcracker kinda thing? Like he can’t move his mouth up or down. However he can move like his cheeks and upper lip, allowing him to slightly smile or frown

Like that(it’s shitty cause I’m in the car)

Once he got out of the lake after a while, he crawled out of the castle (it was probably night at the time so he wasn’t caught). He couldn’t walk because he was in a lot of pain. He stayed at a dumpster(obviously) for the night and eventually just decided to stay in them.

Now once he was able to walk and move around again, he started walking around the back streets of Cyber City and just started digging through the trash. Doing this, he found the outfit he wears in game. It was filled with holes so he patched it up with other things he found.

Eventually he snuck back into the mansion somehow, remembering the Neo body. I’m not up to date on the lore for what exactly happened so I don’t have much for this but I have one thing. Spamton found the glasses he wears at Swatches shop or somewhere in the castle. He thought maybe he could try and disguise himself but one he was short and the acid did not help. He did still alter his appearance to look more like swatch to get to the Neo body, which obv failed.

I also really like the idea of him always having that voice thing where he blurts out random advertisements, however it gets worse when he isn’t himself or just not feeling well. When he was with the other Addisons he was very quiet and shy, partly because of this. He used to really hate it and when he became successful he was so scared of messing up on interviews and commercials. The addisons (specifically Pink) would joke about this, which would get under his skin. However (of course I’m putting spamvil in this) Jevil found it kinda cool. He had an interesting way of speaking himself so he found the advertisements kinda cute.

Speaking of Jevil i wanna talk about him too. I picture him and Spamton meeting like this. Spamton takes a drive to just idk get away from stuff and his car breaks down. He does know how to fix it but he doesn’t have the tools on him bc why would he. He’s trying to call someone but the signal sucks because they don’t really use phones there. He’s super frustrated so he just walks away. Jevil just happened to be hanging around doing whatever and he saw Spamton. At first Spamton was like “what the fuck”. He asked if there were any places where he could get his car fixed and Jevil was just like 🤷‍♂️. Spamton was very annoyed and frustrated so Jevil just took him around the kingdom to pass time until the morning. The two became ‘friends’ after this but Spamton def had something for Jevil. When the morning came Spamton was finally able to get a hold of someone and he left the kingdom. However because they’re friends now Jevil and Spamton wrote to eachother to communicate. Once they became closer and Jevil visited Cyber city more and more Jevil got a phone and was able to talk to spamton easier.

Also if you’re curious about what happened between them just check out the Spamvil comic I made🤑.

Now getting to the divorce. All of what I just said happened before Spamton was thrown into the acid. Now because both of them went insane for separate reasons, they probably had a fight caused by that and just decided it would be best to separate. This happened right when Spamton started losing everything after he didn’t get the phone call back.

HOWEVER. they do get back together eventually. I do NOT want spamton or Jevil dying after their boss fights. I made a separate post about this before but after Spamton’s boss fight he lived in the castle with Ralsei and the others. He became really good friends with Ralsei and helped him decorate and paint the rooms. (I’ve said this a million times before but I hc spamton as an artist) Eventually Ralsei found Jevil because he didn’t move in after his boss fight (he was hangin around doing his own thing for a bit). Ralsei didn’t tell Spamton who was moving in so when Spamton had finished his room he was just shocked to see him.

It basically went like this. Spamton was finishing up painting his room and he heard the door open. Ralsei was just showing Jevil his room, unaware the two knew eachother. Both of them were just shocked. Ralsei was confused but Jevil had asked for him to just wait outside for a bit. The two awkwardly talked for a minute. Because they separated at such a strange time and now that they were in better places and not entirely unstable, they missed eachother. They talked it out and set up a time to just work things out.

Eventually they did and then they kissed and all is well🥳🥳

Edit: Here’s some stuff about his time with the Addison bc I forgor :3

While Spamton lived with the Addison he was closest to Blue. He was the nicest to Spamton and helped him as much as he could. Spamton and Pink probably had the worst relationship. Pink was kind of an ass to Spamton just because he knew Spamton was doing anything for his company and was kind of just really bad at his job.

Spamton helped the Addison with things like keeping track of numbers and advertisements. I headcanon that Spamton is really good with math so he can help the Addison’s with numbers stuff. He also draws many advertisements for all of them because he’s an artist.

When Spamton became successful, Pink was the first to ditch him. Then it was yellow. Then orange. But it took a while for Blue. He stuck with him. He was friends with him. But spamton grew greedy and kind of rude. He only ever focused on his business. He never had time for anything else. It was all he ever talked about. Blue cared about him but he couldn’t do it anymore. After a fight, blue ditched him and Spamton officially had no friends. He had Jevil but we all know how that ended up☹️

When Spamton is not entirely insane anymore and after everything happens he meets up with the Addisons again and tries to fix their friendship. Eventually everyone, even Pink, forgives him and they’re all friends now. Spamton still helps them out with advertisements and numbers just like he used to🥳

Okay so that’s basically it!! Really enjoyed writing this and I’ll update is as soon as I come up with something new!!

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Bath time for greasy boys

This was inspired by a brief conversation I had over on Twitter. Also, I didn't know how to end this.

You walked into your room to see Shanks lounging on your shared bed. He was still covered in grime from a day of traipsing through the jungle. You frowned, displeased with him because those were fresh sheets you had put on that afternoon, and now he had his muddy boots and sweaty ass on them. You also knew he wasn't going to want to take a bath. The man hated bathing more than a dog, but he was always happy to swim in lakes, rivers, strange puddles, and the ocean. Shanks was also much larger ad stronger than you, so you'd have to lure him into the bathroom. You pulled off your top and threw it at him on the bed. When the shirt landed on him, Shanks opened his eyes and smiled at you as he said. "Hey, gorgeous, what are you up to?"

You were going to use yourself to lure him to the bathroom, so you smirked at him and purred, "why don't you come here and find out." You made your way into the bathroom and turned on the shower. Shanks followed you in, and chuckled, "You gonna take a shower, do I get ta watch?"

You quickly lock the door behind him and press your back up against the door to keep him in side. You smiled and laughed, "no, you're the one taking a shower."

Shanks' smiled dropped, and he gasped, "you tricked me!" You grabbed his hands as they lunged for the door knob and wrestled him into the shower. The only advantage you had was that Shanks wasn't willing to hurt you. Because as you pushed his reluctant form under the shower, he didn't fight very hard. Which led you to believe he was just being difficult for his own amusement. Shanks whined once his head was fully under the shower. "It's so hot, my skin is melting off!"

You huffed and turned down the temperature before working on getting Shanks' clothes off. Today was obviously a day that Shanks was acting like a brat, because he made no move to help you. After you manhandled him out of his clothes, you tossed them on the floor behind you and reached for the shampoo. As you turned your attention from him, Shanks made a run for the door. You turned back to see his hairy ass jiggling as he tried to open the door. You reached over, grabbing a nearby towel, and whipped his ass with it. The towel let out a loud crack before hitting his skin, making him shriek. Shanks pressed his back up against the door to protect it, only to realize he just ate up the precious seconds he had to get out before you could close the space between you. You grabbed his ear and guided him back to the tub. Soon as you let him go, Shanks curled up on the floor of the tub, getting comfortable. You sat on the edge and began to lather shampoo into his hair as you giggle, "it was a valiant effort, my love, but it's bath time for greasy boys."

Shanks pouted his lower lip, dramatically, and leaned his head back against your chest, and grumbled, "I'm not greasy."

You scoffed, "tell that to the sheets I'm going to need to change before we can go to bed."

After you had rinsed the conditioner out of Shanks' hair, he made another half-hearted escape attempt, only to slip on the tub. While he flailed to prevent himself from falling, Shanks wrapped his arm around you for support, only for you to be yanked in the tub with him. Shanks gave you a goof smile that made your heart melt.

"You're so fucking adorable." You confessed, cupping his cheek in your hand.

"What was that? I didn't hear you," Shanks joked.

"Come here, idiot," you mused, pulling him down into a kiss.

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