#but it’s vague enough to apply to other stuffs

[smol-and-trashy]

Dual POV vore thing

Idk it wasn’t Twisted Wonderland related until it kinda became. Imagine whatever smug character you want tbh. The only TWST ref is the character’s name

———————————

He had her.

As her tiny form slipped down his throat, he traced her descent. Following the slight bulge from beneath his chin to the crest of his collarbone.

Reclining in the chair, its front wooden legs hovering as his feet rested on the table for balance, he hummed.

Beyond savoring her taste, the sensation of her plunging deeper into his core was undeniably delicious, delectable.

As she pooled into his gut, her immediate squirms and muffled words were met with casual indifference. He pressed the flat of his fingers to his belly, grinning as a flurry of movement occurred in retaliation.

Sure, he’ll release her eventually, but for now, he was going to have some fun with his little toy.

••••••••••••••••••

Plus a prey POV, let’s name her Yuu lol

The asshole actually swallowed her. As Yuu slid down his throat, she was in a shocked trance. Sure, he was playing around with her, raising her above his open mouth and whatnot but she didn’t think the oaf would actually swallow.

Squeezed down his tight gullet, it felt like the world’s most claustrophobic water slide. Yuu dropped into a more open space, the walls dripped with liquid, constantly moving, and the stale odor of past meals made her irritably kick at the nearest wall.

Unbridled chuckles closed in around her, hurling Yuu across the confined space. Her nails dug into the floor, trying to grasp some semblance of stability as she shook off the dizziness. Nerves grated, anxiety fried — she lashed out, hitting and scratching at the walls. Yuu’s entire body was drenched and sticky, courtesy of the oppressive mugginess of her surroundings.

With her hair clinging to her face, Yuu swore she would make this bastard pay the moment she got out of here.

[solarmorrigan]

Steve and Robin are going to need new jobs after spring break because, let's face it, they left the video store in the middle of their shifts and just never came back. That's kind of a fireable offense

They see one of the local diners is hiring both cooks and servers, so off they go to apply. The manager assumes Robin is there for a waitress position and Steve is there to be a cook

This is not so

You think Robin can stack dishes up her arms and carry them around like that? You think she can balance an entire tray of glass on one shoulder and weave around other servers and tables and not drop anything? You think she wants to pretend to be interested in people's inane small talk and put up with men flirting with her so she can get a good tip? Absolutely not, she's here to be a cook

Meanwhile, Steve thrives on other people. He doesn't want to be stuck in the back getting sweaty and covered in grease from the grill (that would be hell on his skin, honestly). Besides, his balance is excellent, he has zero trouble lifting heavy trays, and he's great at pretending to be interested in small talk and flirting with people. He's here to be a server

The manager doesn't really have any better prospects, so even with Steve and Robin's suspiciously vague "resignation" from Family Video, they're hired

The uniform for the cooks is basically just jeans and a clean t-shirt, and Robin kind of loves it. She likes dressing up sometimes, but under her terms; she doesn't want to be expected to do it, and she enjoys the lack of expectations placed on her appearance when she's just here to sling burgers and pancakes

The uniform for servers (well, the uniform for the waitresses, because up to this point the diner has been the kind that has sassy, middle-aged women as servers almost exclusively) is a collared, short-sleeve shirt and a good black skirt (or pair of slacks). Also a frilly half-apron

The manager, awkwardly holding the apron up for Steve: I'm sure we can find you something a little less...

Steve, already tying the apron on: I've worn worse things

(They never bother finding him another apron. He rocks it)

The other servers are a little suspicious of Steve at first, but they eventually become his number one fans. He's a hard worker when he wants to be, he'll carry anything for anyone with only an amusing amount of complaining, and he gladly takes the tables with creeps who come in and make the waitresses uncomfortable

The cooks (all men, because that’s how it works, isn’t it) didn't think Robin would be able to keep up with them at first, but damn if they don't come around real quick. She has no problem yelling when she needs something, she has damn pointy elbows that she will employ if someone gets in her way, and finally—finally!—someone has skinny enough arms to reach in and clean the spaces they usually have to pull stuff out to get to

She absolutely extorts favors out of the other cooks in exchange for reaching into these tiny spaces. Is cleaning the kitchen already part of her job? Yes. Does this stop her? No.

No one who works at the diner ever once thought Steve and Robin were dating. They applied together, they take as many shifts as possible together, they have no problem invading one another's personal space, but the first time everyone sees Robin yelling at Steve through the window for NOT TELLING HER HE HAS A PARTY OF EIGHT, DOES HE THINK SHE'S GODDAMN MAGIC and Steve yelling back that maybe he'd have remembered to do that if he hadn't been busy looking for the side of pancakes THAT HE'S STILL MISSING, BY THE WAY, ROBIN, they're all like ...Oh. Siblings. Okay.

If any of the other servers have lingering doubts about Steve’s character, they only have to see him the first time the kids come and invade the diner. They request Steve as their server, and he huffs and he rolls his eyes and he tells them that, no, they are not ordering all of that, but he gets them every damn thing they ask for anyway, remembers to modify some of their orders because Dustin doesn't like pickles on his burger and Mike likes extra salt on his fries, and he smiles while the kids bicker and laugh over their food when he thinks no one can see him

And Robin complains about all the special orders, but she comes out to say hello when she's done cooking it all, and she glows when they tell her how good the food is

[kcamberart]

Development going forward

So in case anyone hasn't heard, Unity announced this morning that they're going to be making some pretty major (baffling) changes to their licensing plans and monetization. TLDR regarding the pertinent info (from what I understand. The company hasn't made another statement at the time of writing, and the FAQ is very vague):

They've removed the cheapest paid subscription tier (Unity Plus) completely, and are altering Unity Personal (the free one) so that the editor needs an internet connection in order to function. If you're offline for 3 days, it kicks you out until you reconnect to the internet again for the software to phone home. This is apparently not an issue if you subscribe to Unity Pro, the $2,000/yr plan.

If you publish a game made using the Unity engine, once it passes a certain threshold of installations and revenue, Unity will charge you a fee for every subsequent installation of your game on a per-month basis (and it's not per-purchase, it's per-installation. So (allegedly) if someone on Steam buys, installs, uninstalls and then reinstalls your game, or if they need to update the game, that's considered multiple different instances of installation and Unity will (allegedly) charge the developer as such). This will go into effect in January of 2024, but will seemingly retroactively apply to all games published before then as well.

If I've misunderstood any of this, please feel free to correct me.

I would not be surprised if they heavily walk back some of this (i.e., "the last time we announced something bad everyone got mad about it, so this time we'll announce something unbelievable and then say that we changed our minds so people will be more willing to accept the slightly less bad thing we wanted to do in the first place"), but it's setting a very bad precedent for using Unity for any future projects.

I'm currently weighing my options on whether to finish Vollema in Unity and then migrate to a new engine for future projects (Godot gets better every day, from what I've heard), or to just take what I've made so far and start over using different software. Honestly, it's early enough in development that the vast majority of what I have finished and ready to implement is visual assets, dialogue, narrative stuff and audio, so I'm leaning heavily towards testing the waters with a different engine. I likely also will not be able to work on or release any smaller games in the coming months for the time being (RIP 2023 Halloween Game, I'll make it up to you) while I make some decisions. Regardless, I'll keep you all in the loop.

TLDR: I'm likely going to be changing game engines, which will definitely set Vollema's development time back a bit (along with my other projects), but development in general will continue regardless.

Hopefully I'll have more positive news to share with you soon! I'm gonna miss my add-ons, though. Oh man, am I gonna miss my add-ons.

[meanbossart]

i always love asking ppl this; how does your character (du drow) see themselves .vs. how they are seen by others (loved ones, friends, acquaintances, etc)

That is a good question!

When it comes to his self-perception, DU Drow assumes he cuts a very intimidating and off-putting figure at worst - and someone impressive and powerful at best.; he doesn't care either way as long as it favors him in either being left alone or getting what he wants out of people. He believes himself to appear confident and as having little regard for other people besides for his tight-knit group of friends and partner. He does believe that he's reliable - and even caring, as weirdly as he may express it. Not particularly intelligent but not dense enough to seem like an idiot. When it comes to more complex stuff - his needs, wants, beliefs, and how that comes across - his self-understanding is extremely lacking and vague. He doesn't have much of a point of comparison, however, so he doesn't really grapple with that.

When it comes to strangers (at least on the surface) he is pretty much right that he comes across as a scary, powerful person. Funnily enough, in the Underdark he is way less impressive to most of the population - a strange sight nonetheless, but his tactics don't work as well on it's citizens. Most drow don't know what to make of him, and generaly don't take him seriously or assume him to be half-something else or even not a drow at all.

(Shadowheart's and Astarion's POVs below, NOTE: these are based on what their relationships are like at the end-game/post-game, obviously there would be some significant differences if we were to talk about first-impressions and so on)

Shadowheart, being his closest friend, sees DU drow as kind of a doofus. She understands him as an animal with simple motivations and impulses, and has no real interest in pushing him to be anything else - in fact she envies how simplistically DU drow seems to view life and every hurdle that it throws his way, and looks up to him for seeming largely unaffected by his circumstances and unburdened by the things he has done/have happened to him. She does think he's a very fun person to be around - and someone she can say anything to and trust him to tell her exactly whats on his mind back, and generally tell her to pull herself by the bootstraps instead of letting her wallow in misery - she has overall a lot of respect and appreciation for the guy, though she doesn't express it too often since she thinks his ego is inflated enough. She isn't afraid or unnerved by him in the slightest and is kind of amused at how much other people are - she pretty much forgets that he looks like a freak.

As his romantic partner, Astarion's perception on him is fairly different. He thinks a bit more highly of Du drow's intellect than it probably appears, and finds it frustrating that he guy just doesn't seem to want to entertain a lot of... Thinking. He knows he can be perceptive and insightful based on how he treats him, but for whatever reason never applies that to himself, and the more they grow to know each other the more he thinks it's just a barrier DU drow has set up so he doesn't have to grapple with the things he's done and what he is. He is under no illusions that DU drow isn't a egoistical, blood-thirsty person (he likes those things about him, anyway) but worries that one day something will click in his brain, and all that willful ignorance will culminate into something terrible. He also thinks DU drow is a far more empathetic person than himself.

He really likes DU drow's company for his unfiltered demeanor - he thinks he's funny and a good listener (lol) and finds a lot of comfort in being with someone who seems incapable of hiding how they feel about him and their relationship, and doesn't think DU drow has much capacity for being manipulative or deceptive. Naturally he adores how much DU drow seems willing to devote himself to him, but it bothers him that it sometimes seem to veer into weird, damsel-in-distress-fantasy territory. Basically there's a lot about the guy that Astarion both likes and doesn't simultaneously.

[genericpuff]

I don't know the term for creators who became popular outside the traditional steps to "make it" in their profession; then when people started taking their work seriously and giving them criticism, these creators saw it as an attack because they are not used to mentors and studies.

Smythe's professional training is vague at best, being a folklorist. Then there's the creator of the popular hell cartoon that became her own executive producer and director in her 20s (I'm not going to say her name since it tends to attract her rabid fans) and becomes reactive to any kind of criticism on Twitter. Then there's that TikToker Devon Rodriguez, who became popular for sketching people on subways, and when an art critic gave a mild review to his art gallery, Devon unleashed his fans on him.

Like am I seeing a pattern here for artists? And I guess, what do you think we can learn from it.

Ah, so this is a very interesting (and broad) topic that we've touched on in discussions in ULO and other webtoon-related communities. So buckle up, it's time for an ✨essay✨

I think the best way I can sum up my thoughts on this issue is: the vast majority of people who become paid content creators don't seek out a job as content creators, a job in content creation is just something that happens to them.

I say "content creation" because this is something that applies to a lot of other platforms and online mediums as well, such as the examples you included (TikTok, Youtube, Twitch, etc.). And don't get me wrong, it's not like every successful content creator out there didn't work their asses off to get to where they are, but for many... it still involves an element of luck. People don't go to school for it, people don't "apply" to become influencers, and much of it relies entirely on just making stuff until it gets seen and propelled into success.

I think a lot of these issues arise with the creators themselves and how they view their own work. The reality is that many of us artists have been treated as the "rejects" of society, we constantly feel like we're misunderstood and have some deep inner pain that we express through our art, and instead of going to therapy, we come up with OC's. It's a lot more fun and it's a lot cheaper LOL Webcomics naturally wind up being the perfect lightning rod for people who feel that way, where we can pour ourselves into the characters, the world, the narrative, in a way that perfectly mixes our talents for art and our need to express our innermost thoughts and feelings about ourselves and the world around us. So when our art gets criticized or rejected ... it can be hard for a lot of artists to not feel like it's a criticism of the self, a rejection of our identities, an attack on our feelings and experiences, because we've tied so much of ourselves to our work. And this can make that transition very difficult for people who are trying to go pro, because being professional demands separating yourself from your work, at least enough that you can view it objectively, recognize its flaws, seek out pathways to improvement, and not take every bump in the road personally.

A lot of successful creators are people who just never made that transition. It's led to an abundance of professional creators who know how to film themselves or react to content or, in the case of webcomic artists, write stories about their OC's, but don't know how to actually navigate the industry at a professional level. They don't know how to read and negotiate contracts, they don't know what deals are actually good for them and which ones are better left on the table, they don't know how to manage teams of people, they don't know how to react to the attention, praise, and criticism of their audience - they're just doing what they've always done, but now they're making money doing it.

None of this is to speak ill in any way of the creators who've found success and are still just doing what they've always done for money. None of this is meant to be a slight on the creators who are using webcomics and art as an expression of their deeper selves (I do it myself, it's very cathartic!) because ultimately that's what makes your work your work, the fact that you made it, with all your good parts and bad. Many of these creators are capable of running their platform without any issues because they've learned how to play the game, or because their platform is made up of people just like them so their audience is more like just a social circle.

But many of them still also can't operate on a professional level and those are the ones we often see getting called out and held accountable when they do shit like, I dunno, scamming their audiences for money or making alt accounts to manipulate user reviews or plagiarizing from other people's work or just being really REALLY shitty to their own audience.

Often times these are people who are just doing what they'd normally do as a hobby, became well known for it, and managed to turn it into a living. But they never actually learned how to turn their hobby into a job, and themselves into professionals.

And artists especially are prone to this because, let's face it, a lot of us are just weebs having fun drawing our blorbos, so of course if we get a chance to monetize that, we're gonna! We should! We should want to be paid for our work and time and efforts!

But we also have to remember that it's a different ballgame, especially if you're turning your audience into customers. "I'm just a baby creator doing this for fun" doesn't and shouldn't apply anymore once you start signing contracts, selling your art as products, taking people's money to fund your projects, etc. because now it's not just your art, it's what you're expecting people to pay for so you can eat and pay your bills and live.

As much as our art is often personal and should be cherished as such, you can't expect people to want to pay for it if you're not setting a bar and meeting it, or if you're not treating your audience with any amount of dignity or respect.

I'm not saying you're not entitled to having feelings or still wanting to treat your art as art, but the line between art and products is there for a reason, it's to set people's expectations and ensure that both sides are having those expectations met. Webtoon creators suffer from the same thing that a lot of Youtube creators and other types of content creators suffer from in this transition, and I feel like HBomberGuy summed it up best:

"In current discourse, Youtubers simultaneously present as the forefront of a new medium, creative voices that need to be taken seriously as part of the 'next generation of media' - and also uwu smol beans little babies who shouldn't be taken seriously when they rip someone off and make tens of thousands of dollars doing it."

It's not gatekeeping a medium, it's not telling people they aren't allowed to have feelings or to want to still have that personal connection to their work in spite of the professional level it's achieved, it's simply just expecting people to actually live up to the label of 'professional' that they're using to make money.

And this especially goes for someone like Rachel, who claims to be a 'folklorist' despite all the contrary evidence that says otherwise. This is the same person who copy pasted the first result on Google as her source on a simple word definition:

There's a second part to that HBomberGuy quote that also actually applies to Rachel really well in this discussion, concerning how she labels herself a "folklorist" and how that's affected and influenced the greater discussion surrounding Greek myth:

"But on the opposite end, Youtubers who act like serious documentarians gain a shroud of professionalism which then masks the deeply unprofessional things they do. We just saw that with James. I think [James] partially got away with what he's doing for so long because he acts so professional about it, so people assume, 'there's no way he could just be stealing shit!' so they don't check. And on top of that, a lot of James' videos contain obvious mistakes and made-up facts... but because they're often presented next to well-researched stuff he stole, no one questions it. I've seen James repeat a lie in his videos, and then other people claim it's true, and link his video as the proof. He has helped to solidify misinformation by seeming like he's doing his diligence."

There's always going to be discourse over what's legitimate and what isn't when it comes to Greek myth, there are loads of things we still don't know simply due to the knowledge being lost to time. But there's something to be said about a white New Zealand woman using her self-insert romance comic and platform to build a veneer of professionalism and legitimacy around herself, as if she's the authority on the subject, while simultaneously relying on first result Google searches and citing works that have no real foothold in the way of scholarly or "folklorist" discussion.

All that's to say, you're right, her professional training is vague at best. She's never completed a longform comic prior to LO, she's not doing her due diligence in actually engaging with the media she's trying to "retell" and exposing herself to the voices of those from the culture that's tied to it, and she's not holding herself to any sort of standards when it comes not only to being a professional, but a professional who's been held on a pedestal for all these years. She's still operating the same way she was 5 years ago - drawing and writing whatever pops into her head and sending it to her editor for uploading, with next to no intervention or guidance. Except now it doesn't have the benefit of being new and having "potential", it's getting noticed and called out more now than ever because it's been 5 years of this shit and it's been getting worse on account of her clearly being burnt out (or just giving up/not caring) and the readers can't be sold on "potential" anymore.

And that's all I have to say on that.

[coraniaid]

I read this post the other day and now I can't help but try to plot out a S3 AU in which Gwendolyn Post is just a little more patient (and maybe, as a result, she's not yet managed to get herself expelled from the Watcher's Council, so she doesn't have to worry about being exposed as a fraud the minute Rupert Giles thinks to make a single phone call).

A world where Gwen realizes that having unlimited access to a emotionally unstable teenage Slayer with no friends or family in town -- a Slayer who will do almost anything for the smallest scraps of positive attention from an even vaguely maternal authority figure -- might, on balance, be more beneficial to her personal quest for power and magical treasure than immediately burning all her bridges to steal a metal glove that can't ever be taken off and continually casts a spell that summons lightning directly down on to the person wearing it.  

Put yourself in Mrs Gwendolyn Post's shoes. 

Isn't it much smarter to keep playing the part of the stern but genuine Watcher, a part you did after all train for for years of your life -- and maybe quietly help yourself to a few of the more valuable magical items your Slayer happens to bring you on the side -- than to risk it all for one single prize, however rare?  If, with just a little molding and prodding and some barbed compliments now and then, you can get that teenage girl to go out and kill demons and steal all their stuff and bring it all back to you, no questions asked, where's the harm?  All you have to do is keep making sure she remembers that she's fundamentally unlovable and unwanted and that nobody else but you will ever accept her and the best she can ever hope for is your occasional fleeting and conditional praise, as long as she does what she's told and keeps it all a secret.  Half of that is taken verbatim from the Council's own script for enlisting new Slayers anyway. It'll be easy.

Maybe you tell her how impressed you are that she's training throughout the winter, rather than letting herself get distracted by things like holidays or parties or presents. Tell her some half-true story about the focus and determination of long-dead Slayers before her.  (You can go to all the parties you want, of course.  These rules don’t apply to you.)  Maybe you show up at her motel room briefly later, just to make sure she didn't take up that irritating other girl's unexpected offer to go to her house for dinner.  Maybe you reward her dedication to the cause with some little unimportant bauble; something cheap and meaningless you notice she keeps wearing for weeks afterwards, even if she pretended not to be impressed with your gift at the time.  Maybe you stick the crappy little (obviously shoplifted) presents that she nervously watches you unwrap later in a drawer somewhere and never think about them again.

Maybe you give her a little bit of advance warning about the Cruciamentum. Not early enough she can tell anyone else, of course, but early enough that she's ready for it. Not because you care (and you really don’t; she's an easily manipulated idiot and you don't respect her in the slightest), but because you want her to realize that the rest of the Council can't be trusted. That Mr Giles can't be trusted.  That there's only one person in all the world who she can trust.  

And if one night she shows up at your door uninvited to tell you that she killed an innocent man by mistake (you really don't care about this either), and she doesn't have anyone else to turn to (you try not to make it too obvious how pleased you are about that), then ... well, what an opportunity for you.  Obviously you're not going to let anyone else on the Council know about this: maybe they'd take her back to England, wasting all your hard work. Maybe they'd send a new Watcher to interrogate her.  But the Sunnydale police department aren't exactly competent.  You can make it all go away, you tell her.  And you do. 

But you let her know, subtly -- just not too subtly -- how disappointed you are by her carelessness.  How she'll have to work a lot harder from now on to get back into your good graces.  How you've really risked a lot for her tonight (you haven't) and how much she owes you now.  How you'll expect her to do better from now on (or at least to do more, more often, without ever asking inconvenient questions).

The disgrace was almost getting caught, you'll tell her later. That's what you found so deplorable. The mistake was needing to be bailed out.  There’s no excuse for sloppiness.  Killing some idiot who got in the way while the Slayer was doing her job though … well, Faith’s right to think that he wasn’t important.  He didn’t matter.  Oh, and the Sunnydale natural history museum is hosting an exhibit of a few rare magical objects next week that it would probably be best to keep in safe hands.  (Which is to say, of course, your hands.)  You don’t think Buffy or Giles need to know about it, do you, Faith? It would be best to be discreet about securing the necessary items, but if some idiot happens to get in the way, well...

There's no real risk of Faith being tricked into outing herself, the way she was tricked into revealing she was working for the Mayor in canon, because it's not a secret that Gwendolyn Post is Faith's Watcher.  Faith is supposed to listen to her Watcher, isn’t she?  And if her Watcher tells Faith to kill some demon and bring her the valuable books he was trying to sell, why shouldn't Faith do it?  Killing demons is her job, isn't it?  She’s good at killing things.  Good at stealing things, too, it turns out. Sometimes you don't even have to pretend to be impressed.

If Faith seems increasingly sad and withdrawn all the time, why do you care? It doesn't make her any less useful. And if Faith doesn't talk to anyone much anymore, and keeps some of her missions secret from her fellow Slayer and all of that other Slayer's little friends and hangers-on, what's so strange about that?  They're not Faith's friends, after all. None of them are.  Faith doesn't have friends.  Never needed them.  She's got somebody though.  She's got Mrs Post.

[arogustus]

Splatband Analysis - Squid Squad + Diss-Pair

(Disclaimer: This analysis in based on what I get out of looking into the character descriptions we have of the splatband characters. If you disagree with what I say, that is fine, we are all beheld to our opinions. Just don’t be a jerk about it.)

The Squad of Squid (and that one urchin). Squid Squad was the first splatband, with the two super cool songs that dominated the music scene, one of which is an emblematic part of Turf War gameplay. They’re also the band with the juiciest drama out of all the splatbands. Plagiarism, violence and relationship drama. This band has it all, so let’s see what all that was!

Also Warabi is here too I guess. They’re just one octopus, so it’s easy to jam them in here.

The Band

Squid Squad was Inkopolis’ hottest act back in the first Splatoon, and evidently have been playing for a decent while before they gained notoriety in Turf Wars with their latest album, Fresh Kids. They don’t make many public appearances due to their popularity causing them to get constantly mobbed by fans. Despite that, their success hides their amateurish nature, as outside of Ikkan, none of the band members know much about making music, practically winging it when it comes to their stuff, though definitely with a lot of passion for it. 

Internally, the band seemed to be rife with discord between band members that got bad enough the bassist eventually up and left, though not before one final concert on Starfish Mainstage. After that, silence for everyone but Quinn, who later pops up in Diss-Pair in Splatoon 2. According to Booyah Base, the others were focusing on their solo careers. But they did come back as Front Roe, although now actively distancing themselves from their past, to the point of not even performing any of their old songs. They want a fresh start, and want the world to see them for their talent and not for their fame. Though it’s fair to say the failure of Squid Squad is probably still fresh in their hearts.

Ichiya

Oh, Ichiya. Who knew the guy who looks like a fish gasping for air out of water would be at the center of so much drama. Let’s start with the information we learned most recently. That is, that he’s not an Inkopolis native, but actually from the Splatlands! We don’t know what made him move over to Inkopolis, Beika is pretty vague about the circumstances, but he seems to have adapted pretty well to the local culture. His relationship to Beika itself is its own mystery. All we have to go over is that the two were close enough that they had shared knowledge of Now or Never. Maybe he used to be a part of C-Side before Inkopolis? Maybe the two were close friends, or dating? No one is willing to give a straight answer. According to Splatune 3, he and Front Roe have made no comment on the matter, though people assume they are outraged. Note the keyword “assume”, here, that’s just what the public thinks.

He’s described as selfish, with the temperament of a prodigy and rockstar charm that draws people to him. The trademarks of someone who’s letting fame get to their heads it seems, though not immediately noticeable considering the charm thing. He probably seems cooler when seen from a distance, but you realize his negatives once you get to know him. This aspect seems to have faded for Front Roe, considering their current distancing from their past fame is kinda antithetical to his personality in Squid Squad. He’s hiding his identity (poorly) alongside the others, so something must have changed.

On the topic of being a prodigy, Ichiya can’t read!.. Music. He doesn’t know how to read music, I assume his other reading levels are normal. This is shocking since he’s the one who writes the band's music. He’s just getting by with flashy guitar riffs. This is actually reflected in the music itself. I’ve seen plenty of musicians react videos of Splattack that point out how relatively simple and easy to learn and perform the song is. I wonder if this applies to other bands. At the very least Ikkan saw this potential and wanted to mentor him, but considering how that went (the two’s arguments got bad enough they got in a live shootout with each other), it’s fair to say he wasn’t receptive to that gesture. 

Namida

Namida is the crazy girl of the team. We don’t get an idea as to how other than the bunch of nicknames she gets people to call her. The examples we got are “Mida-Chan”, "Master Namida", "Naminami", and "Girl from Planet Namik". Mida-Chan and Naminami sound like casual nicknames you’d get a friend to call you, while Girl from Planet Namik makes her sound eccentric and out of this world. Master Namida gives the feeling of wanting to be looked up to, probably a nickname used whenever someone asks her something. Am I reading too deep into these random nicknames? Yes, that’s the whole point of this analysis.

One minor thing is that she has knowledge in jazz theory. Seems she was studying jazz in particular before joining Squid Squad. Maybe she likes Ink Theory? At the very least she’s noted to be pretty skilled. Her lore is pretty sparse, all things considered.

Murasaki

Murasaki is next. The youngest member of the band, as the original Squid Research Lab tweet describes him as a youngster, and he’s called wild child due to his drumming skills. Not that he actually knows much about drumming, he’s like Ichiya in that he relies a lot on raw talent. Uncanny sense of rhythm, but not a lot of technique. He’s passionate, though, considering he cries during his drum solos. Energetic and emotional, especially once he gets going on the drum kit. The Squid Research Lab also describes him as “rough around the edges”. He must have been a prickly (hehe) kid, but one with a good heart. 

We do get to hear about him in Splatune 3’s section for Front Roe. He’s hanging out in bars now, and gives a cryptic answer to the question of whether Ikkan would ever collab with Front Roe (I’ll go into that in Ikkan’s section). He’s probably just throwing off the interviewer for the sake of the band's privacy.

Small but funny thing, Squid Squad actually starred in a small, four panel gag comic once, picture below. Definitely the best treatment a Splatband has ever gotten before Splatoon 3. Considering it’s a gag comic, it’s hard to say if this is how Murasaki is treated by his fanbase. But uh, if it is, I think he’s got reasons to be a little prickly.

Ikkan

The other center of drama that also looks like a dying fish. Look at how much he and Ichiya have in common. He’s the oldest member of the band, and evidently the most experienced and responsible as well. Always arrives early before anyone else, and leaves the stage after everyone else. Even wanted to try and mentor Ichiya to help him actually learn music. Funny that he thought Squid Squad was just a passing fad in the grand scheme of things. Maybe he cared more than he let on? If you remember the Ink Theory valentine’s artwork

and look at his bass case, you can see he still has Squid Squad stickers slapped on them. And then there’s the whole thing with Front Roe’s other song, Sandy Side Up, which appears to feature vocals of both him and Warabi. The fact that both sides are being deliberately vague about a reunion does give the potential that it is a reunion, but there is no concrete answer.

Personality wise, beyond that dedication and passion for music, he’s not a very emotive person. That dead fish stare is apparently his default look, and he doesn’t move around a lot while performing. Still, when Ichiya shot him with a gun, he shot back with his own (what the fuck), and then he stopped showing up to rehearsals and eventually left the band entirely. His response to being asked a question he doesn’t want to answer (would he ever reunite with Squid Squad?) was to say “that’s a good question”, and then he just left the room and never returned.  

Now, as we all know, he did come back in a new band for Splatoon 2, Diss-Pair, having found an Octoling twink overseas who he befriended. It’s through here that we get a bit more insight about his reasons for leaving Squid Squad. Specifically he disliked the lack of tension, and them just being yes-men to whatever he said. Considering their overall inexperience, Squid Squad didn’t have much in terms of discussion over the songwriting process. But he did find it with Warabi, at least. Their first meeting was mistaken for an argument, and they have this balanced dynamic of pointing out each other's flaws while still trusting each other enough to not even have to look at each other during performances. He really respects the octoling.

Warabi

Diss-Pair’s other half, and an octoling that has been living on the surface for quite some time it seems. Now, I don’t mean offense, but I don’t much care for the “Warabi is an Octarian” headcanon. A lot of the info we’re given of them pretty heavily imply they were born on the surface. Their parents are famous actors, they had a musical education for gifted kids, they visit up to twenty countries a year on their tours before Diss-Pair. All of it just screams surface octopus. Marina does state she’s friends with them, along with Paul, who’s heavily implied to be an Octarian octoling. Maybe they’re friends because she’s an octoling DJ in a city notoriously lacking in the species overall? At least one thing we don’t know is where they are from, as Ikkan met them overseas. But yeah, surface octopus. 

Anyway, onto the octopus, they’re a DJ, specifically a Beatsmith with a strong focus on EDM style stuff. Their interest didn’t start early though, having come after growing up surrounded by music genres from around the world through their actor parents, complete with classical music education. Electronic music came to them in their teenage years, which seems to be their main deal. No details on their exact relationship with their parents, but at the very least it seems they indulge them in their love of music, so the relationship might be positive. They’re apparently very demanding as a performer, with demands that seem all over the place, but that belies a clever and intelligent person. An eccentric artist it seems, probably someone who asks people to serve a bowl full of only red M&M’s, but who actually knows their shit. And considering they’re meant to be a mismatch with the stoic, unemotive Ikkan, it’s likely they’re much more lively and energetic compared to him just to make the contrast between the two clearer. Despite those differences and the arguments they seem to have, they get along and greatly respect Ikkan.

It’s nice for Ikkan that he found someone who he considers an equal.

---

I wonder what we'll learn about Front Roe once the Side Order artbook is released (nothing like it has been announced, but come on, it has to be coming). Will the Beika/Ichiya drama reach its tipping point? Will Namida get more crazy nicknames? Will Ikkan be there and somehow answer nothing? It's all I care about, really, I'd settle for just buying the splatband pages of the artbook.

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

Just another manic Monday

Written for the @steddieholidaydrabbles, day 17

Prompt: Platonic Stobin

Rated: G

CW: monsters

Tags: Urban fantasy AU; Magic AU; Creature AU; background Steddie; background Buckingham

Notes: Based on an idea and the gorgeous art by @house-of-the-moving-image - so happy I got to throw a little something together for it. 🥰

“I don't understand this,” Steve yells, jumping over another garbage bag like a hurdle sprinter. “That thing is fucking huge, where was it even hiding?”

“Gee, I dunno, Steve!” Robin skids to a halt beside him and impatiently hops from foot to foot while he pulls out their scooter from  between two dumpsters. “I didn't ask, you think we should wait up?” 

Somewhere behind them, something lets out a loud, gargling roar. A giant body scrapes against the walls of the alley. 

Steve gulps. 

“Nah, I'm good,” he says and tosses her the egg. It's larger than his own head, and Robin sags briefly under its weight. “Get in!”

Sometimes, Steve really, really wishes he was normal. 

In a world where ninety-seven percent of the population are either magic users, non-human, or hybrids, people like Robin and him tend to get the short end of the stick. Take the job market, for example. What's a guy to do if most entry-level positions require basic flight skills, or rudimentary knowledge of summoning spells, or two years minimum of experience in applied runology? 

The job at Fleetfoot Delivery is actually okay, all things considered. The pay is decent, the uniform isn't completely humiliating, and his coworker is his best friend and platonic soulmate who happens to be just as lamely human and completely unmagical as himself. 

It's easy work. Customers trade items via the app, Steve and Robin deliver the goods from the pickup location right to the lucky new owner. 

Basic stuff. 

Simple. 

Boring.

Except for the days you get chased by giant fucking monsters. 

“Who even sells a phoenix egg online?” he asks while he waits for Robin to clamber into the side car. “I mean, shouldn't we be calling child protection services or something?” 

“Phoenixes are extinct, Steve, everyone knows that!” 

He hums vaguely. He does know that, of course, but the question has its desired effect - namely to send her off on a tangent and get her mind off things. 

“The eggs that are left are infertile, but they're highly coveted in certain circles. Rumor has it that consuming one will boost your magic like nothing else. Chrissy says there's a sea witch living off the coast who's been looking for one for-”

“Chrissy, huh?” Steve grins and swings a leg over the saddle. The scooter stutters to life. “The cute little mermaid with the milkshake order from last week? You two on first-name terms now?” 

“Oh, fuck off!” Robin jabs him in the ribs, but quickly clutches the egg again as he needs to swerve around a stack of old, soggy cardboard boxes. They're picking up speed, but not nearly enough in the crammed, narrow alley. Behind them, the roaring and scraping are getting louder. “You don't get to berate me for flirting with clients. If I see you do that ass-wiggle in your stupid shorts in front of that dragon dude one more time-” 

“His name is Eddie,” Steve snaps, neck erupting in heat. “And I don't think he has any idea what my first name is. Or my last name.”

“Yes, Steve, of course,” Robin deadpans. “That is why he calls you big boy and honey and sweetheart. That is the actual reason.” 

Steve lets this statement simmer for a few seconds. 

“Shut up and tell me where to deliver this thing,” he then says. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Robin smirk while she fishes her phone from her pocket and tells him the address.

“Oh, freaking great,” Steve grouses. “That's only on the other side of town. Won't take forever at all at this-” 

“Steve?” says Robin. Her hand is tugging at the sleeve of his uniform jacket, like she's been trying to get his attention for a while. “Steve, you may wanna go faster.” 

“I know!” he groans. “Need to beat rush hour, or we won't be home until-”

“That's not what I meant!” Robin shouts. Her voice goes all shrill and grating towards the end, and he almost crashes them into the wall in his impulse to cover his ears. 

“Well, what do you-” he starts to say, but doesn't get any further.

There's a loud crashing sound as the dumpsters are mowed over. He glances over his shoulder, just long enough to see a slimy, clawed something that's roughly the size of his house erupt from the alley behind them. It shrieks. The rush of hot, stinking breath sends garbage flying in all directions. A fist-sized glob of spit hits the back of Steve's head with a wet splotch. 

“Ugh, what the fuck? I just washed my hair this mor-”

“Drive!” Robin slaps his arm. “Oh my God, drive, drive, drive!” 

Steve does. 

They shoot out of the alley and onto the main road, just narrowly avoiding a collision with a flock of banshees. As their scandalized shrieks and the roar of the monster fade behind them, Robin's wristwatch buzzes. 

“Oh,” she says. “Today's your lucky day. A certain dragon just ordered an entire crate of aventurine, express delivery.”

Steve groans and takes a right, reaching up to disentangle half a banana skin from his drool-coated hair.

The day is shaping up to be a real Monday. 

All my holiday drabbles

[lets-try-some-writing]

Hi! I see you've been writing some stuff for Tfp humans and because I'm a Tfp human enjoyer I thought I could request something:)) (I personally cannot write so yeahh)

Fell free to do it and feel free to not do it if you don't feel like it :))

So,

How about an AU where June and Fowler (due to some relic to stuff) get aged back to when they were 16/17. They were probably wildly different than their adult versions and seeing kids interact with 80's teenagers would be fun (I personally hc Fowler & June to be in their late 30s like 39 so if Tfp is in 2011 yeah they would be teens in the 80s)

Also,here are some of my personal hcs for teenage June & Fowler which you can use but if you feel like they would be different feel free to do that too :))

Fowler was kinda the high school jock/a chad as one could call it. Also probably smoked even though he was under age lol. Probably a rock fan who plays the guitar to impress girls lol

As for June,I see her to be a rebel who wanted to be in a biker gang/generally into motorcycles. Probably like Miko but more reserved :)).

Also have my teenage Fowler doodle as an add on cause it's relevant

Sorry that the ask is so long btw I feel strongly about tfp humans 😭

Feel free to take anything/nothing into consideration for the main scenario :))

EXCELLENT ART!!! SORRY THIS TOOK TEN BILLION YEARS TO GET TO!!!

━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙ ━━━━━━━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙

Relics are not known to mess with age. The few that have such properties do little to harm a mech aside from possibly get rid of a beloved mod or engraving. As such, the team left one of their various collected relics just... laying on Ratchet's workbench. It wasn't particularly dangerous, and Optimus's memories of the archives stated that it had slight rejuvenation properties. That was all. It was essentially a small healing device meant to be applied to minor wounds.

But of course, anything minor to Cybertronians tends to be definitively less so to humans.

June and Fowler were left to keep a vague eye on the relic while the team performed other tasks. They chatted and overall relaxed, but at some point, Fowler noticed the relic was a little too close to the edge of the table for his liking. Sure the thing was almost as big as he was, but in his mind, with the help of June, they could push it back onto the table proper and rest easy knowing there would be no surprise clank to startle them or upset Ratchet. Their attempt to be helpful very quickly ended with a flash of light, every living being in the base hurrying toward two sets of screams, and gasps of horror all around.

June and Fowler were younger, WAY younger. Upon analysis, both were in their late teens biologically. Ratchet and Optimus argued over what to do, and upon seeing the relic, the overall consensus was that the two rejuvenated humans would have to remain at base until Ratchet could figure out a way to reverse the effects. It was not ideal, but a few calls later, things were organized enough. The military would cover for the loss of both Agent Fowler and June for the time being, and the team would get to work.

The team got busy and went about their work and June and Fowler stayed put... mostly. Despite having memories and experiences to match their adult selves, both teens had opinions and feelings regarding things. All three of the kids collectively decided they did not in fact enjoy these younger versions of the adults they knew within... about two minutes.

Fowler was a piece of work. He paraded around like he was in charge, but had the unfortunate habit of shoving Jack around for the kick of it. He didn't mean it maliciously, but the constant shoving did get on nerves. It did not help that Fowler used his spare time to work out now that his back was not murdering him every two steps. A definitive six pack most certainly did not endear him to Jack with his twiggy body. Fowler tried to get along with them by playing the adult, but being young again put a certain spring in his step and before long, he was off to cause problems. Lifting weights and wearing absolutely cringe worthy headbands, Fowler took off gleefully. The children avoided him like the plague, especially when he tried to rope them into his terrible 80s workout video exercise routine.

June was arguably worse in that while she wasn't outright cringy, she did have a few... habits. Her haircut was enough for even Miko to look away in shame. June's choice of clothing prompted three in sync face palms. And to add to it, she was absolutely determined to continue being the adult in the room even upon immediately getting distracted with video games and Fowler himself. Her use of 80s slang and her determination to ignore the rules just enough to be annoying quickly got on the nerves of everyone, especially the kids. Don't touch that? Oh she didn't touch it, she just got really REALLY close to it while making direct eye contact. Don't bother Ratchet? Well guess what, Ratchet gets a few dozen questions anyway.

Both were menaces to society just by existing. The team personally didn't mind all that much. What difference did personality shifts in small squishies mean to them? However even Bumblebee cringed internally as he watched the various scenes with the duo play out. Arcee for her part got several pleas from June to let her try Arcee's alt mode. Fowler may or may not have also tried to get Bulkhead to let him use the forklift to play lob ball, kind of.

Chaotic monsters all around.

Jack could do nothing but pray for the team to work quickly for the sake of his sanity. Miko is enough trouble on her own.

[f0xgl0v3]

How does one Elias Bouchard hold his Pipe/The overall murder scene

Tw this like entire post is about the proper way to hold a pipe if you wanna effectively hit someone with it several times repeatedly :3 also spoilers for MAG 80

Guys I am simply a writer and this is just for writing and thought experiment purposes, none of this shall or should be applied to real life and it’s just for the haha extended sounds of brutal pipe murder-

What has come to my life-? I’m talking about Elias Bouchard and how he holds the Pipe to murder people- I, there will be actual Percy Jackson stuff soon. Maybe talking about Camp Jupiter and armor and gear and stuff or something however,

Everyone draws Elias with really weird hand positions on the pipe-? That’s a weird thing to say and the art is fantastic but if your beating someone with a Pipe then there seems to be a way I always thought in my head-

Let’s, for the sake that I’m halfway through season 4 consider the only Pipe murder I am currently aware of would be Jurgen Leitner’s, we can work with this. Elias is standing over him at the other side of a desk while Jurgen is seated I believe-? There are a couple ways we can go about this,

1) Elias hits him while they both are in the neutral position at the desk

2) Elias walks over to Jurgen’s side during the conversation and hits him then

3) Jurgen stands up from his chair and then Elias hits him.

I have had to listen to the sound clip so many times for this- I- okay. So, the beginning of the murder still is Jurgen talking, I think audibly a bit worried. I’d like to make the assumption that while Elias is like “bird stuff always a risk about death” that is when the pipe is revealed, Jurgen is taking the moment to try and reason with him and I think 2 and 3 are the most viable due to the sound they use. In 1’s scenario Elias wouldn’t get enough strength in that first swing (due to the desk being in the way, and Elias most likely having to lean over the desk to try and get a strong strike.

Then, the sound- I believe Elias initially hits Jurgen from the side of the head, think like the same ‘row’ that your temples are on, that vague side of the head. Jurgen is heard with a grunt by the first hit; we don’t hear him fall or anything (which makes me suspect it could be a situation of Elias walking over to the other side of the table) and it doesn’t really sound like Elias moves where he hits very much- continuing to strike that original spot; otherwise we’d likely hear the crunch of bone. Am I making the assumption that the sound design would include the crunch and that I would know what hitting a skull with a metal pipe is, oh yeah totally.

Now, that settles how I think this entire thing played out, Elias revealing the pipe as he walks over to the side, Jurgen looks up in old sad man still seated and is trying to reason with Elias, maybe he even attempts to get up and that is when Elias strikes in the right side of his head (just what makes sense to me, it could be the left either it wouldn’t matter much) and repeatedly hits there 11 times (yes I counted the strikes we hear, no I don’t have anything better to do with my time because I’m putting off writing a script) before like dipping or whatever.

Now, the pipe posture if you will. I see so many drawings of Elias’s hands like this,

Raised, and for all intents and purposes from an art sense it’s rad. It’s a dynamic pose and stuff, and of course this is not a critique on artists (who are way better than me) and how they want to draw this fictional man hold his pipe. However this is my brainrot talking on the ‘hey I think this is how he’d get the most effective swing’ because I’ve listened to two seasons back to back and I no longer have a brain.

But; Elias Bouchard wants the most bang for his buck so to speak. I think holding the Pipe like the tried and true baseball bat would provide this. Elias holding it like in my very bad diagram is good if he’d want to poke or stab someone with the pipe, but it’s really effective if you can get that swing in. So yeah, baseball style; hands together near the end of the pipe and over a shoulder or even over his head if you want to be silly with his posing.

Uh, haha okay. I’m sorry but the rot is all consuming and I’ve been thinking about him a lot, also like Peter Lukas and a bunch of the other sillies but this kinda- forced itself out while I was looking at art of the scene. I, uh, :3 that’s all. I like thinking about the mapping and layout and planning of scenes like these and how the visuals might’ve looked if there were visuals. I promise I probably won’t make any more posts like this for a solid while (however, talking about Bryce Lawerence and my thing in SoN are-imagining that he was the one to kill Gwen… maybe.)

[greentrickster]

(walks up to the microphone and leans in): Okay, so, I’ve seen a lot of Ghost King Danny (which, let’s be fair, is a fun concept, I totally get it), but I’ll see you that and raise you this: Fright Knight Vlad. The current Fright Knight himself is the Spirit of Halloween, but what if it’s like how, while Pariah Dark was the Ghost King, certain circumstances being met can make someone else the Ghost King. And this applies to members of the Ghost King’s court as well, including the Fright Knight.

And let’s say that the Fright Knight, the Ghost King’s right-hand spook, isn’t a battle-based position, but one based on what the current Ghost King most needs from a right-hand spook upon their ascension to the throne. Pariah Dark was a conqueror, so his Fright Knight was a powerful ghost skilled in battle, the Spirit of Halloween. But Danny’s not a conqueror, he doesn’t even typically seek out fights unless there’s a reason he has to. What he’d likely need most is someone who’s really good at politics, has the respect/fear of a decent amount of the Ghost Zone, and who could maybe give him some pointers on how to go about all this. Maybe teach him how to handle his powers better or something while they’re at it.

Which leads to Vlad waking up one morning and the Fright Knight’s sword (the Soul Shredder) is just… hovering over him. He doesn’t know why, his research into ghosts tends to be in regards to ways to gain power, not culture and traditions. Not to mention, he has no idea that Danny finally cracked and accepted his status as Ghost King the night before. He’s got no way (that he’s actually bothered to look at) of knowing that taking the sword is a binding agreement to accept the position and a declaration of fealty to the new monarch until such a time as he’s released from this oath.

Cue the Ghost Zone getting to watch in a combination of amusement and deep concern as their new king and what’s supposed to be his staunchest ally proceed to try and beat the stuffing out of each other in a swathe of chaos spanning Amity Park, Wisconsin, and a good chunk of the Ghost Zone. This is an unprecedented occurrence, no one’s ever accepted the position of Fright Knight without at least a vague idea of what they’re doing, and it’s certainly never been someone who’s enemies with the new monarch. The Fright Knight physically can’t try and overthrow the King, it’s part of the binding agreement accepting the sword entails, so no one who’s planning to attempt just that has ever been dumb enough to try it. Especially because it’s a job you’re stuck with either until there’s a new monarch, or the current monarch’s needs change so drastically that you’re no longer qualified for the job.

Congratulations, Vlad, you’re going to go down in history for this one.

Also, just worth noting, I do not see this going in a shippy way or anything like that. This would be a set-up for enemies-to-friends, with maybe a culmination of some good Badger Cereal (ie, platonic Danny and Vlad bonding, friendship/mentory stuff, maybe some found family if you’re feeling wild). No mental compulsions or anything going on with Vlad for this, either, it’s more along the lines of getting whacked with the Spector Deflector if he tries to use his new position against his king, and possibly it forces him to pull his punches somewhat if he gets into a physical brawl with Danny unless Danny specifically tells him to go all-out. I dunno, I don’t have all the details, I just think it would be funny as heck for Vlad to get himself stuck in a position like this and also that he’d look good in armor.

Also also, I’m a sucker for forced bonding leading to friendships and found family and stuff. And enemies-to-friends. And Badger Cereal and mentor!Vlad and Vlad being forced to be a responsible adult and domestication arcs for villains. And Vlad gaining the power he wants but in a way with all these strings attached and also he’s not actually in charge. I want this horrible man looking fine as hell as he’s dragged kicking and screaming into becoming a better person.

Oh wait, no! It’s not so much a physical compulsion or shock collar or anything like that that’s keeping Vlad in line, it’s learning that, while the Fright Knight technically could betray the Ghost King, it’s one of those actions that generally gets you hunted down by the majority of the Ghost Zone unless they really hate the monarch you’re betraying. And the denizens of the Ghost Zone may not be the biggest fans of Danny, but they like him so, so much better than Pariah Dark, and the twerp’s somehow got Clockwork backing him, so it’s probably worth keeping him around for a bit, at least for a century or two, see how things work out. So Vlad’s landed himself in a position that he can’t relinquish, it can only be taken from him in a few certain circumstances, and if he tries to overthrow or betray Danny, it’s good odds the majority of the Ghost Zone will unify to hunt him down.

Getting strong-armed into being Danny’s staunch ally on pain of ectoplasmic retribution was not how he saw this Thursday going, but b’golly if it hasn’t happened anyway. Maybe- maybe he’ll just call off work today, go grab a bottle of wine to drink while cuddling Maddie-the-Cat, staring into the distance, and asking what he, an angel, ever did to deserve this.

[animasola86]

Struggles of a Smut Writer

Things I wonder about, mostly after I submit a piece when I should think about it earlier. Re-reading my own stuff always comes at a cost.

Anatomy

Can this even work? How does it work? What the fuck is happening?! The time I spent staring at anatomical pictures (or porn) or checking things out myself, oof. But research is important, right?

Limbs/Bodies (ties into Anatomy)

Where is his hand, where is she, how are they connected/touching, where is what? Did they move? Where is what now? How can they move? What exactly is going on?

Word repetition

Can I write cock again? When did I last use cock? Should I use something else? How many synonyms do I really know? Doesn't it sound silly? Am I even describing the right thing? (Last one ties into Anatomy/Language)

Language (can apply to any writing, not just smut)

I am not a native English-speaker, I learned from different media sources from different countries. Is this how a British person would speak? (As I write mostly for HL/HP characters, they have to sound British imo.) What's the term for this? Why does that sound so weird? Do people say this? Can I just add another gerund to this, how many times have I used "as" now? How long is that sentence really?

Details

How many details are too many details? Is it necessary to describe every single thing, isn't it too much? Can I even write vague anymore? I used to, I was so vague in my early writings, you'd have to get a magnifying glass to spot the smut. Not anymore. There are so many details now, holy shit. Too many? Or should I add even more? Is it enough? Can people understand what's going on?

Is this even sexy?

I write what I want to read, so I cater to my own tastes. Will other people enjoy this as well? Or is it too weird? Am I disgusting for thinking/writing about these things? What is wrong with me?

What next?

What can I write about next? Isn't it all the same at the end? How can I make it different/better/more diverse? How many kinks are too many kinks? Which ones have I not yet written about? Won't this get boring? Should I do reader-insert or third-person? Whose POV? How can I make this work?

The struggles are real.

[ AO3 ] [ masterlist ]

[wormlette]

We are not a pet play expert but we ARE someone who spends entirely too much time working with kink psychology. The good pet play on AO3 is sadly very thin on the ground and we tend to make it harder for ourself by going exclusively for fandoms who have like five authors maximum so we can't offer recommendations but to be quite honest Laios feels like the kind of guy who'd really enjoy a day collar or something similar in that it would give him, like, a physical reminder of being, in some way, wanted, and a tactile sense of connection. Any sort of distinct accessory that serves as a subtle "mark of ownership" during day-to-day works here, but "day collar" is easier to say.

He would probably want to have something that can be tugged on and used as a handle or similar, honestly. He might find use in anything that Chilchuck can use to more easily catch his attention or, like, offer a physical "guide" to move him around by - Chilchuck may not be physically strong enough to actually move him on his own, but a bit of extra leverage can probably get a setup where it's a Noticeable Physical Sensation and Laios can follow through on his own. It would be INSANELY impractical in the dungeon, though, which would definitely put a stopper to it - the handle that you have put in so that your halfling pick-lock can have a shot at moving you around at will can also be utilized by enemies who were capable of moving you around previously and probably don't need the extra handle.

We feel like Chilchuck might not 100% Get the full "belonging" aspect of a day collar, at least initially but he could definitely get some mileage out of adding a built-in handle to get Laios's attention. The issue would, of course, be in getting them to this point - we feel like it wouldn't come up super easily? Most likely, we think it'd be the sort of thing where Chilchuck makes an offhand comment without it meant to be taken Seriously and Laios jumps on it as "hey we could actually do that".

Chilchuck feels like the sort of guy where it simply wouldn't have passed his mind that a day collar could be a Thing and the idea of someone Wanting that would be a bit out of his sphere of... interest? Knowledge? He wouldn't think of it until the idea of it'd be brought up, and he honestly might take a bit of convincing to come around to it. Laios feels like the kind of guy where he thinks about "what if I wore a harness like an actual beast of burden" and then he thinks about that continually for the next five years.

We can probably give advice on tracking down resources on IRL pet play, but we can't help very much with fiction? Our #1 thing that we feel we Need to have in any fic regardless of content is good characterization, and this tends to significantly narrow the margin of Things We Can Recommend because something can be a stunningly beautiful depiction of how to write pet play but we still won't like it if it's OOC and we are unfortunately prone to having the disease where we exclusively get into stuff that has maybe three other people in the same area.

Hopefully this coheres for you we're sort of rambling with hopes that this'll vaguely get at what we're aiming for - we are heavily impacted by our own personal desires to add MORE spec. bio to everything we're into, ever, so we're unclear if our halfling agriculture & domestication thoughts would fully apply?

We definitely agree that dogs would be uncommon or rare - a poorly-trained dog can probably be a very real danger to even an adult halfling, and the larger breeds of dog can get to be bigger than them, which'll be a HUGE risk especially for an environment when they can't be 100% sure of the breed content of any given dog. You can easily run into Issues training dogs as a normal-sized human - it's going to be a whole lot harder and more risky to get something that's BIGGER than you and can seriously injure or kill you to LISTEN, especially when your stakes are "either you do this right or you are at significant risk of injury from a dog that hasn't quite been trained to be considerate around halflings".

If the dog doesn't know precisely how gentle to go with its pack, then even with good intentions, it can hurt someone very badly - you've definitely got to know EXACTLY what you're doing, or otherwise have a very good trainer. Of course, that might be able to add to fun metaphors later, so... depends on how you handle it. Or handle them, as it may be.

We think that the most familiar form of animal agriculture to them would probably involve raising things like silkworms, mealworms, crickets, and other bugs, both for general materials and because they're small enough that "raising bugs for meat" almost definitely gives more bang for their buck than it would for larger races. We feel like larger domestic animals would be significantly rarer, just because trying to tame just about anything long enough to domesticate when you're only 100cm tall is going to be DIFFICULT. Easier to just make domestic lineages of things like "animal where you can put it somewhere dark and damp with some corn meal and potato slices and get ten times the yield after leaving it for a few weeks". Of course, they'd probably have other domestic animals beyond bugs, but we can't really think of what exactly - ferrets, maybe? Humans domesticated them for hunting, but halflings might be able to make more use of them.

Hopefully some of this at least sparks a bit of inspiration for you - we're simply having fun typing Words. Good luck with your writing!

Ok this is so fucking good I need to stop hoarding it. Everytime I go to publish I start rereading and get distracted 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 Laios seems like the kind of guy where he thinks about “what if I wear a harness like an actual beast of burden” and then is thinking about it for the next 5 years… HELP… YEAG…..

I FEEL YOU I’m becoming a pet play enjoyer but so far nothing scratches the itch like it does with these two. I must do more research and yet…… I just keep coming back to Them. Laios spontaneously inventing the most avant-garde kinks in the dunmesh world… Chilchuck being like what the fuck. Well. What the fuck. I can’t not get him that. And it has to be made out of good materials. He’d fuck it up if he tried doing this himself. TWIST MY ARM. Sigh.

And god yeah the actual animals that half-foots would have … Chil’s upbringing vs Laios’ (with all his animals) would be so different. Brewing many scenes from this.

DREAMY SIGH. THANK U.

[storiesforallfandoms]

cover me ~ ashton irwin

word count: 1908

request?: yes!

“okay but ashton irwin size kink smut. like that man is over a foot taller than me and omg i would kill to be underneath him. like him manhandling you, picking you up over his shoulder and throwing you on the bed. i need it like i need oxygen, more than ever. so please”

description: in which his girlfriend is so much smaller than him, and they both get off on it

pairing: ashton irwin x small!female!reader

warnings: rpf, swearing, pet names (princess, baby), smut (unprotected p in v, fingering, oral m receiving, tummy bulge, references to other sexual activity but nothing in heavy detail), reader is described as being smaller than ash so i apologize if that is not your body type i usually try to be more vague for my fics but this was a request!

masterlist (one, two, three)

Ashton was obsessed with how much bigger he was than you.

At first, he just thought it was adorable. He stood at least a foot taller than you, and he loved to pick you up or give you piggyback rides. When he realized how much bigger his hands were, he teased you about it constantly. He’d put stuff on the top shelf just to watch you struggle to reach it, or so you’d have to ask him to get it for you.

He thought it was adorable and hilarious, until he realized how hot it was.

He could pick you up and fuck you senseless against the wall. His large hands could wrap effortlessly around your throat as he pounded you into the mattress. And occasionally there was a bulge in your tummy when he would bury himself completely inside of you that drove him absolutely wild.

When he realized how hot he found your small size, he just couldn’t stop himself from grabbing you whenever he was feeling needy. If you were in another room, he’d just pick you up effortlessly and carry you to your shared bedroom. Or he’d bend you over the armrest of the couch and make you stand on the tips of your toes so your pussy was the same height as his cock. Or he’d get you in the shower and pick you up to fuck you against the tile wall.

He was a horny bastard, and he’d be the first person to admit that.

It wasn’t always Ashton’s fault, though. You loved to tease him until he had no choice but to fuck you senseless.

Like the day you were at work and he was home, and you decided to tease him through text the whole day.

It started with an innocent enough picture in your work outfit, but you were wearing the skirt that Ashton went crazy for. For good measure, you had pulled it up a bit just for the picture, to make it look shorter. When he responded the way you had wanted him to, you followed up with a dirty text. You had him hooked, and you didn’t stop until you got into your car to drive home.

The second you walked through the door, you found yourself shoved up against the door and Ashton’s hand around your throat. He was squeezing just enough to make you feel lightheaded.

“You naughty girl,” he said, his voice husky with lust. “Do you know how difficult you made my day? I couldn’t get anything done because all I could think of was bending you over in this skirt.”

You squeaked as he slipped his other hand under your skirt. He ran his middle finger over your clothed clit. You whimpered.

“You’re already so wet,” he said. “Have you been fantasizing about having my cock all day? Is that why you were teasing me while you were at work?”

You nodded, but he squeezed your throat a little more. “Use your words.”

“Yes,” you whimpered as he relieved some of the pressure on your throat. “Yes, Ash.”

He was smirking. “You naughty, naughty girl.”

You gasped as he slipped a finger under the lace of your panties and started to run it through your folds. You moaned as he applied pressure to your clit and rubbed agonizingly slow circles. You were becoming lightheaded from the pressure he was applying to your throat, and that was making the feeling of him working on your clit more intense.

He slipped a finger into you and you cried out in pleasure. With your eyes screwed shut from the pleasure, you couldn’t see the look of satisfaction on Ashton’s face. He loved how good he could make you feel, especially when it was just with his fingers.

“Does it feel good, baby?” he asked. “Do you like these big fingers inside your little pussy?”

“Yes!” you cried out. “Fuck yes, Ash, it feels so good!”

He added a second finger, stretching you further. He curled his fingers to stimulate that soft spot inside of you that made you start to see stars.

Your first orgasm hit you without warning. You started to tremble and your vision went white as you clenched around him. You went slack in his arms as your body went numb. Ashton pulled his fingers from you and took hold of you so you wouldn’t fall. You tried to stand on your own, but your legs were too weak. Ashton picked you up to carry you to the bedroom. He laid you down gently onto the bed and pulled your skirt and panties off at one time. You could see the outline of his boner fighting against his sweatpants. You sat up to tug at the waistband of his sweatpants, pulling them and his boxers down just enough for his hard cock to spring free.

He ran a hand through your hair. You looked up at him through your eyelashes and asked, “Can I suck you dick, Ash? Please?”

He groaned in response and pulled your head towards him. You took his cock in your hand and pumped him a few times before wrapping your mouth around the tip. You ran your tongue around the head just as slowly as he had been touching your clit early. His breathing was already becoming staggered as you did, and the hand that was resting in your hair still was starting to grasp at the strands. Slowly you started to take more of his length into his mouth. You didn’t want to over do it just yet, but Ashton involuntarily bucked his hips forward in pleasure and drove his cock into the back of your throat. You gagged and pulled off of him quickly.

“Awe, my little princess,” he cooed. “Can’t even fit this big dick in her little mouth. How are you going to fit all of it in your pussy?”

You ignored his comment and took him in your mouth again. You knew you wouldn’t be able to take the full of him, but something about his comment made you want to take as much as you could possibly handle. You wrapped your hand around the base of his cock, pumping whatever of his length that you couldn’t take in your mouth as you began to bob your head at the same time. Ashton threw his head back and groaned into the empty room, completely taken with the way your mouth felt around him. It was one of his most favorite feelings in the world, second only to the feeling of being buried balls deep inside of you.

You didn’t have him in your mouth for long before he was pulling at your hair, taking you completely off of him and pulling you into a kiss. It was sloppy and quick, and soon enough he was pushing you back down onto the bed.

“I can’t do any more teasing,” he said. “I need you.”

You stripped off your shirt and bra, and he took off his own shirt and kicked his sweatpants and boxers somewhere onto the floor. He climbed onto the bed, towering over you. You remembered how intimidated you felt seeing him like this for the first time. You knew Ashton was anything but intimidating or scary, but his height made it feel like he was towering over you. Not to mention the size of his cock actually had you worried at the time that he wouldn’t fit.

Now, though, the sight of him kneeling over you, his cock red and stood at full attention, was an extreme turn on.

He lined himself up with your entrance, running his tip through your folds to collect the moisture that was left from your orgasm. He pushed into you slowly, giving you time to adjust to every inch of him. One of your hands was gripping at the sheets beneath you, while the other was holding onto Ashton’s hand. He watched as he disappeared inside of you until his pelvic bone was pressing against your clit. He leaned down to kiss you, his entire body covering yours.

His thrusts started slow as he buried his head into the crook of your neck. He placed small kisses over your neck and collarbone. Each inwards thrust made his pelvic bone brush against your clit in a way that sent shocks of pleasure through your body. You could feel the pressure slowly building up in your stomach. While you didn’t want to cum again just yet, it was almost frustrating how slowly it was starting to build. You wanted to chase that high quickly once it had started.

Ashton pulled away from you to sit up on his kneels. He pressed a hand against your stomach and you gasped at the feeling.

“God, I love when I can see the bulge,” he said, looking down at where your bodies were connected. “Can you feel me deep in your guts, princess?”

“Y-Yes,” you breathed. “God, Ash, it feels so good. I’m getting so close.”

“Cum for me, princess. Let me feel you tightening around my cock.”

He pressed his thumb against your clit and started to rub circles until the pressure in your stomach became too much. You called his name as you felt yourself cumming again, this one somehow more intense than the first. Ashton groaned at the feeling of you squeezing his cock and it was enough for him to hit his climax, too. He buried himself completely inside of you as he spilled his seed into you. You were both panting messes as he slumped on top of you.

You giggled and pushed at him. “Ash, you’re going to crush me.”

“Can’t move. Feel too good,” he responded.

“You won’t feel good if you crush me to death.”

He pushed himself up on his elbows to hover over you. “I wouldn’t crush you to death. You’re dramatic.”

“Try having someone who’s basically twice your size lay their full weight on top of you, then tell me I’m being dramatic.” You sat up a little to kiss his nose before flopping back down onto the bed.

Ashton reluctantly pulled himself from you. You couldn’t help but pout from the empty feeling as he did so. He got up and went to the bathroom to get you both clothes to clean up with. He passed you yours, still nice and warm from the sink, and you quickly wiped yourself down. You grabbed his shirt from the floor and pulled it on while he pulled on his boxers.

“So,” he said, “got what you wanted, then? That was the idea behind sending the naughty texts?”

You grinned slyly at him. “Well, I did expect you to fuck me until I couldn’t stand, but I also just felt like being in a teasing mood.”

“I can’t believe you wore the skirt. I love that skirt. That skirt was supposed to be for me to see and me only.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him back down onto the bed with you. “Other people may have seen it, but just remember you’re the only one allowed to bend me over in it.”

He smiled and pressed a kiss to your head. “That does make me very happy to think about. I may do that later once we’re both in the mood for round two, since I didn’t get a chance when you came home.”

[ofbreathandflame]

Personally, I dnt see Nesta abusing Feyre because of how vague their history in their past home was like. They seemed on v equal ground wit the way they argued and fought. Feyre calls Nesta a burden then Nesta retaliates. Nesta warns Feyre about the old hag and Feyre brings up their past fight from the other night. Nesta tries to save Feyre and Feyre realizes there is more to her sister than she thought.

They always were at odds with each other but their never seemed to be any serious power dynamic between them. Neither was afraid of the other and both saw themselves in the other. I honestly think they both have stuff to answer for from their days in the cottage.

In SF, the book even says that Feyre wasn’t perfect and that she made mistakes but their past doesn’t have to define their future. Again, we dnt know what those mistakes could have been since there is such vague exploration of their dynamic back then. But passages in the books like these make me see that it wasn’t abuse between them. It certainly wasn’t healthy but definetly not so one-sided as many antis make it out to be.

hi anon!!

my response is loooooong 😭

i do really want to talk about this. i think the set up in the cabin is very important to the foundation of the sisters' relationship, and because its left as this gaping hole that lacks nuance and logic, it muddles the characterization going forward. a court of silver flames runs into trouble for this reasons, hence why is said it employs the use of 'placeholder' plotlines. to start, as many have stated before me, the set-up in the cabin makes no sense. none. not even a little. that matters for a lot of reasons but specifically because we can't really argue the validity of any of the sister's actions when the worldbuilding around them has none to begin.

its very hard to apply a real system of continual power, abuse, and neglect, when the circumstances around such dynamic is vague and uncommitted. the story doesn't want to commit to the consequences, but it also doesn't want to establish a relationship between the sisters without placing feyre as the permanent victim. so - it created an absurd scenario that doesn't make any sense. what i am saying is - the story has to go wayyyy out of its way to make elain and nesta 'villains' - to the point that the plot can't even support it. like for example, the girls live together in the cabin without feyre hunting for about a good 3-4 years. that means: someone clothed them, someone fed them, someone cleaned, someone took care of them. someone picked up the slack and its wasn't feyre. we know that mama archeron dies when the girls are 8, 10, and 11 - and the shortly after that, they lose their wealth. so - the girls are maybe 11, 13, and 14. literal children. and again - someone had to be taking care of them, a dynamic existed before feyre went hunting, but somehow never gets brought up. if the story is committed to this story, why doesn't it highlight nesta/feyre/elain's relationship in the moments where feyre isn't hunting? what was their relationship like? what was feyre like? these are perfect moments to establish the relationship. even if the sisters were lazy - what would they be doing all day? how would they even sustain themselves on meat all year long? even if the sisters were evil sisters there's little motivation for them to even be like this. the sisters are only three years apart. literally. when feyre was 8, elain was 10, and nesta was 11. thats not a big enough age-gap to even sustain partially of what the story argues about why the sisters have a disconnect. nesta would have been a BABY when feyre and elain were born - where is the motivation? how do elain and nesta develop a faction when they would have been mere toddlers when feyre came into the picture???

either papa archeron isn't a deadbeat or some mysterious force clothed, bathed, fed, and took care of them. like even the circumstances behind papa archeron being a deadbeat make no sense??/

and then there's the added layer of the suppose abuse the grandmother and mother were doling out to nesta, elain, and feyre. nesta was physically abused, and feyre was neglected to hell and high water - there's a plot pont to exploit right there. if the story wants to commit to nesta being abusive, but also wants her to be sympathetic, validating where her anger comes from, while acknowledging how it negatively affected her relationships with her sisters would be the perfect way to go. playing into the mirror sacrifices these sisters (youngest and oldest) made towards one another would have been *chefs kiss*. but again - the story leaned way too moral to even attempt a conversation like this. its willing to forgive the tamlins, rhys's and cassians, but not the women in the story. the thing is - the story doesn't commit to real faults with feyre - and it doesn't do that with nesta or elain either. they are only a standard to compare feyre against. and that's why the story cannot commit to a basic conversation between the sisters - there's nothing that exists between the except the drama. nesta has to atone for mystery reasons bc the story has rewrote their dynamic too many times. sjm acknowledges that the sisters are caricatures at this point of the story, but she doesn't rewrite the first book to accommodate her switch is plot direction.

nesta can't really tell feyre 'why she treated her x way ' bc the story doesn't know why either. a reason doesn't exist. elains book will probably have the same issue, on an even broader scale bc it doesn't actually have a reason these sisters chose to stare at a wall for 24 hours out of the day. the reason elain 'chooses not to help' is even more flimsy than the reason it gave nesta. esp bc the story later establishes that elain isn't even supposed to be a bad person, she can actually be caring. shes also a gardener so it also makes no sense that she would...cringe away from feyre bc of dirt???? that part makes no sense. she literally refused gloves at some point bc she liked to use her hands. she does so in the same book. and i don't even like this character but its the truth, and its why i cannot adequately take what the story argues about the sister seriously. nothing about what it argues makes any logical sense. it for this story...yeah that matters.

so....its valid that people don't take those chapters seriously. they are actually written with unserious intent. like how can i be angry at the sisters when the story argues they were essentially staring into space for eight years??? argues that papa archeron with 10000000 connections couldn't just....use those connections like he literally did near the end of tar and war? that the sisters could live off wild meat for years and still be alive? that toddler nesta and baby elain annexed toddler feyre??? its an unserious situation here. like feyre would rather -- @ 11, 14 or whatever age the story chooses to argue -- would immediately turn to the deadly woods and not yknow...an actual job??? mmkay.

[faeriekit]

I have an MLIS and I am trying to find a job in a library - how did you find yours?

Hiya! Sorry to say that I'm probably the worst person to ask, because I had a library job before getting my MLIS. Like a lot of people on the shelf of what to choose to do professionally forever, I signed onto a shelver/circ desk part time gig when I was vaguely interested in library stuff, and then started looking for a MLS program I liked. That gave me access to the internal job board for some upwards mobility once I was into my degree program.

Advice other people have told me before, however, constitutes this:

Your state library association may have its own separate job board. Go to that one. Use the newest job postings; some old ones may be posted but already internally filled. There may even be a routine— I know our state's updates a specific day of the week, every week. If there's a state border by you and you don't mind working there either, check and see if you can access that too.

Apply anyway. The job you get at first might be bad but job searching with an income and experience is so so so much easier than applying without either.

NETWORK. OH MY GODS HALF THIS JOB IS NETWORKING. Joining your state library association might be expensive but if there's any library organization you can latch onto, do it. That's how you find out about jobs before they're even posted and find out who's interviewing and what they like to hear and what they're looking for in a candidate and what the job environment is like... Make friends with every librarian.

It's easier to do this part when you're in school, but walking into your local library and asking questions about library topics and environment questions helps you ingratiate with the local library professionals community. Having an ice breaker like "I had this question for my essay... can I interview you?" Makes this a lot easier, but it's not like AS doesn't automatically get job board questions all the time anyway. Network network network.

If you had a library you worked with during your practicum, continue to foster those relationships with the staff. Email them questions. Ask for advice. Ask for resources. They may even have a public lending access for library journals you can scour. Call and see if the local universities hire non-students. Ask them the same questions— it's not like they won't answer non-student questions, they just can't lend you anything without an account or alumni account. Hell, email your old advisors at the school you went to and ask them where to look. It's pretty bleak to be out there with an MLIS and no idea where you're going, but there are opportunities available. Most of them are just...really really annoying to find.

I should know. My boss's boss once insisted on posting our job openings to the local community "only on facebook, since they should be internet proficient enough to use Facebook at least."

Yeah. At least she seems to have figured out that the local community uses WhatsApp since then...

Good luck!! 🍀🍀🍀🤧🍀