#but my GOD. ouch. ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

just a thought !! but what do u think ‘suki would do if he accidentally hurt reader ? like an elbow to the nose or smth , bc i kid u not that happened with my bf today and he would not leave until i told him i was fine 😭 js thought that katsu wld be an internal emotion wreck ??!

wait i love this omg😭😭tysm for the ask anon this is so cute, your boyfriend sounds like a sweetheart !

your nose stings.

you don’t really know how it happened, but you ended up getting decked in the nose by your boyfriend. accidentally, of course, said boyfriend would rip his own nails of before even thinking of hurting you. however, said boyfriend was also built out of fucking marble.

so it wouldn’t be surprising to say your nose hurt like a bitch.

“ow, ow, ow !” you whine, katsuki channels through confusion, realization and utter fear in about a millisecond. his hands smack against your face.

“holy—shit ! what the fuck’re y’doin’ ?!” his eyes scan all over your face like he’d shot you, and it honestly almost felt like he did. his hands grip at your cheeks. you wince when he presses his thumb to your nose. “ow—i was jus’ g’nna surprise you—ouch, katsuki !”

you pull your face out of his grip but he pulls you back, “stop squirmin’ an’ let me see.” he mumbles quietly, eyebrows furrowed hard. in focus or anger or worry but probably a mix of all three if you knew anything about him.

“holy fuck, why were you sneakin’ around like that, dummy..” you want to roll your eyes about him still trying to scold you, but the tone of his voice is different then when he usually does. he does sound genuinely worried so you want to reassure him.

“i was just trying to say hello.” you reiterate. “suki, i’m fine. it’s already starting to hurt less.” he ignores you and continues to inspect your face.

“nothin’ broken..” he mumbles to himself, thumbing at your nose a bit softer this time. you manage a snort.

“of course not, jesus, katsuki—”

“you’re okay, yeah ?”

“yes !” you giggle, gripping at his wrists. he pouts, studying your face. “it’s already starting to hurt less.”

he frowns even harder “i elbowed the shit outta you.”

“by accident.” you correct, “katsuki, it’s fine.”

“..you’re sure.”

“i’m sure.” you nod, smiling at him to reinforce your point. he squints, then sighs loudly. leaning in to kiss the bridge of your nose, copying the get better kisses you jokingly give him that he always scoffs at but insist you give him without fault. it hurts a bit, but you feel giddy anyway, your smile grows wider.

“don’t sneak up on me like that again, dummy.” he insists “i mean it.”

you cross your fingers together “promise.” you hum, he scoffs, you don’t think he can muster up a roll of his eyes right now since he can’t seem to be able of taking them away from you. he runs his thumb over your forehead.

“if it starts hurting or something, you tell me.”

“katsuki !” you groan, laughing. katsuki doesn’t look amused. not at all.

he growls “oi, i mean it.”

“i got it, i told you i am fine. you’re okay.” it seems that was the reassurance he needed. that you weren’t mad at him to boot. he exhales, shoulders dropping the slightest bit.

“…...you’re positive ?”

“katsuki, i swear to god—”

[fuji-sen]

the 'evil imposter' just wants to be a baker!

Prologue: The Food turned Imposter?!

Part 1: Sunsettias.

[ masterlist ] || [ part 2 ]

🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯

⌞Forest of Color: ⌝

⌞A salad made from fresh fruit and vegetables. Blanch the Grainfruit, chop the other ingredients, drizzle over the sauce, then stir until evenly mixed. Extremely simple to make, but even more importantly, it's so healthy that no matter how much you eat, you won't feel stressed!⌝

You stared at the in-game meal right in front of you, it was a late friday night and you were wasting the hours away curiously reading and looking through the official page that contained all of the food and drinks that could be found in your comfort game, Genshin Impact.

As a student in the culinary course and a rather enthusiastic foodie, one of the factors you always looked for when playing or finding a certain game or watching a particular show was their cuisine!

Just staring at the delicious looking, not-real, food always got your appetite running. Part of your little hobby was trying to even recreate certain dishes like those foodtubers did in youtube! Right now while mentally eating the pixelated dish in your mind, you were also picking the next food you'd try to recreate.

'Perhaps I should pick from star rail, none of the food here has picked my fancy. .' you thought to yourself while leaning back on your chair and making a point to stroke your chin with a thoughtful expression. 'Ah! how about the Mondstadt hash browns, I could even try to make Razor's variant dish!'

Snapping your fingers you immediately went to the kitchens, mentally patting yourself on the back for going grocery shopping the day before. So like usual, in the comfort of your own apartment, you began to cook, then eat and clean up, before retiring to your bedroom, dozing off with a full stomach and a lazy smile.

Z z z. . .

"Huh?" You swat at your face before sneezing, immediately standing up as you felt something tickling your face, what fell from your face and onto your lap was a pristine white feather.

Immediately standing up, finding yourself out of bed, no, out of your own room and seemingly not even in your fucking city as you started at the environment before you. Lush, verdant grass that swayed with the winds. Birds chirping as they flew high and above your form, some scattering the same feathers that made you sneeze.

A wave of fear and confusion washed over you, you were afraid as you began to realize this wasn't a dream when you ran, and ran, and tripped. Part of your pajama pants had been ruined and vaguely you can feel the blood dripped down on your leg from your fresh injury.

Wincing you stand up, not bothering to look as it as you cried out, wondering, where the hell were you?

. . .

It probably took you a few hours to get your bearings, sitting by a tree as you hugged your knees and contemplated your existence, did you screw with some God or Rich Asshole and they decided to kidnap you and dump you in the middle of nowhere as revenge?

Nah, you were antisocial, so screwing with some rich guy was highly unlike with your lack of a social life. You bit your nails, was it God? "At least give me a sign of where I am!" you shout frustrated as you pulled at your locks.

"Ouch!" Wincing, you rubbed the top part of your head as something fell on it, the perpetrator was round, yellow and orange in color. Your eyes widened, silently grabbing it as you ignored the now dulling pain in your head. .

It was plump, fragrant. .

you bit it.

It tasted sweet.

you ignored the juice that dribbled down you chin as you nodded, yes, this was how you imagined Sunsettia's would taste like base on it's description.

you blinked, jaw dropping.

Sunsettias. .

fuck you were in Teyvat, basically Genshin Impact.

A part of you felt like you were screwed, considering how all of your worldly possessions were gone, and you were here in nothing but your pockets. One hand went to pat the pockets of your pajamas. .

Eyes lighting up as you felt something, pulling that item out, you were speechless as your hand simply held an old expired coupon for some ramen. . .

screwed it is then.

🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯

I need to find a banner to use for the series, also also although I put in Baker, the reader will also make dishes, both from in-game and in real lifeee so if you want a particular dish featured in a future chapter, add the recommended dish in my ASKS so it can be a surprise for other readers! Please also add information about that dish since I may most likely not be familiar with themm

[kalifornia1025]

The Resident Patient Pt. 2 (SPOILERS)

Alright sequel notes coming up now!

Fun sleepover, huh? Yeah if only

Poor John sounds so scared

Right, Mariana would be a believer in ghosts 

NOT THE SPINNING POTTERY SCENE REFERENCE, JOHN

Tippy toes? Wow

Ooh yes! Using the mic to bring up recorded evidence is a feature we don’t hear option but SHOULD

I’d be just like Mariana bringing up The Shining in this situation, except I’d do it more liking a joking skeptic

‘Roadkill’? Damn, that was kinda rude Mariana

Mariana: “Call the journalist!”, John: “I don’t want to!” - same John I hate phone calls

This little exchange was cute to me: 

Avery: “What? What’s this hmm? Are you a doctor?”

Sherlock: “No but he is” *referring to John*

John: *ahem* “Hello”

“The only crime that is rife around her involves tax evaders or high-end sex workers. You don’t strike me as either” - okay SHERLOCK?

Ah yes here’s where Sherlock refuses to help the guy because he’s lying 

What’s the deal with magnets in this case?

JOHN’S I LOVE LONDON SHIRT MENTIONED AGAIN!!

Oh wow Sherlock is HEATED about this dude, even saying “go ahead and die, see if I care”

Spooky sleepover!!

Ah yes a mandatory Blair Witch Project mention when recording in a spooky place

Another fun exchange for this episode:

Sherlock: “Good God!”

John: “What is it?!”

Sherlock: “This jacket is grotesque”

John: “God sake”

John…are you asking Sherlock to strip your corpse so your ghost wouldn’t be stuck wearing the pjs you died in??

“Would you like to be found naked? Or perhaps in the disgusting jacket?” - we’re getting silly & sassy Sherlock in this case, I love it!

“You have a sharp mind. You’re a brilliant man, your thoughts and opinions are never stupid” - awww Sherlock complimenting John is so sweet!!

“Well that’s just stupid” - welp that didn’t last long

“Fill a brother in” - NOT SHERLOCK SAYING WHAT JOHN SAID IN PT. 1

Why are they being so cute right now???

Oh shit, crime is happening! GO AWAY, Sherlock and John are bonding!

Listening with headphones sounds like Sherlock is whispering over my shoulder (creepy and uncomfortable)

Ouch, at least you tried to do it, John (maybe better luck with that in the future?)

The disgusting jacket ends up being useful!

“You ok, mate?” - I honestly love how John asks how his friends are doing during cases

Oh…looks like he went ahead and died just like you wanted Sherlock…

Oh wow, that ending for Pt. 2 is…dark. I knew it was gonna happen based on reading it from the ACD story, but it’s always interesting to hear how they present it in the podcast. 

But on a more positive note this case is so Johnlock-positive! Whether or not you ship it, you gotta admit that they’re so much friendlier towards each other here. Also Sherlock is just so much more silly and feral in this case and it’s so funny to me! We need more ‘silly goofy mood’ Sherlock. Alright, tune in next week for the Resident Patient finale…

[fastboatsmojito]

Some Depraved Billy Butcher Smut

This is becoming a pattern I feel - it’s been a long day forgive me

18+ Smut btc, He’s pretty mean, like shove the side of your face into the brick wall of a building mean, you’re also pretty mean to him oops, almost dacryphilia but not quite ?? His hands are filthy for sure but you let him put them inside of you anyways <3 is that true love - This is incredibly self-indulgent and nasty - LOCK ME UP !!!!

Unfortunately drooling over the thought of yelling at butcher in some dark alley in the middle of a mission you’re supposed to be finishing 🧎HEAR ME OUT

——

You’re pissed off, yelling at him about being as careless as he always was, planting a hand firm on his chest and pushing him into the wall of some building you couldn’t care less about, all while he gave you some shitty excuse about doing ‘whatever it takes to get the job done’. You’re in his face, anger written all over your own while he waited for you to finish your lecture.

“Shouldn’t care so much about someone like me for fucks’ sake, so what if I get a little roughed up? It’s part of the job.” He explained, not really understanding the reason behind your protest nor caring to.

“Fuck you.” You said with a final glare, walking backwards and away from him as you took a few deep breaths to regain yourself, before quickly turning around and marching towards him when you heard him chuckle behind you.

“What the fuck are you laughing about?” He had quite the bad habit of not taking you seriously, on and off the job, and it only pissed you off further.

“Just a bit hard to take you seriously like this ‘s all” He was smiling like a fucking idiot when you walked back up to him, wordlessly threatening to slap him with a raised hand.

“Handsy, are we? Relax. Not a bad thing to be soft. It’s a good look on ya, hand to god.” He put a hand over his heart like he was promising when he said it, but you wouldn’t be surprised if his other hand was occupied with keeping two fingers crossed behind his back.

“You know you’re not my boss anymore, right? I might work with you but I follow M.M. You’re just some asshole I have to go on missions with now.” Your words didn’t carry the venom you tried to conjure out of yourself, disappointment that you were actually letting him get to you settling in.

“Ouch.” He said, voice dripping with sarcasm as he sauntered closer to you. “Why don’t we just get back to work, eh? Finish this little spat when we don’t have some D-lister supe up our asses?”

“Fuck that and fuck you, Butcher. I’m not going to work with a psycho that doesn’t care if he gets himself or his partner killed. I don’t have time for this shit, if you want to ruin your life do it on your own time. I’m done.” You spat before turning away again, this time stopped by him moving in front of you.

“Hang on just a second there, I might put myself in danger for this but I still protect you. Might have a shitty way of showin’ it but that’s the reason you’re not here alone. Think M.M would send me somewhere for no reason? You’re good enough to do the job alone just fine, but there’s about six Vaught cunts in there just waitin’ on you to walk in alone.” He stopped himself with a drop of his head while you stood in what you could only describe as confusion, a tinge of guilt in your stomach.

He raised his head after a moment of you not responding. “Come on.” He gestured back towards the building entrance, looking at you with something along the lines of remorse, a look you’d never seen on him.

Maybe it was the quiet, the only audible noises your own heartbeat in your ears and the low passing of cars on the street a few feet ahead of you. Maybe it was the moonlight lightly tracing over both of your outlines, giving the man in front of you a soft glow as he seemingly patiently waited on you. Maybe it was every other time you’ve wanted to say that to him, finally getting a response that wasn’t complete bullshit. Whatever it was, every possible excuse felt ultimately irrelevant by the time you shoved your lips into his own.

It was difficult to shock someone like Butcher, there was basically nothing you could say or do that he hadn’t heard or seen before, but you felt the hesitation from him anyway. It was just a second but the tension felt heavy right until the moment you felt him kissing you back. It wasn’t soft, you couldn’t possibly have expected it to be, his rough palms moving to your sides almost immediately.

—

You blinked away the tears threatening to spill over your lash line as he shoved your face into the brick wall in front of you, his other hand currently two fingers deep inside of you, to which you had no prior warning in true Billy Butcher fashion. It was no secret he was just as much a dick in the sex department as he was out of it, relentlessly teasing you like a fucking animal.

“Yellin’ at me get you this worked up, did it?” He covered your body with his own but that didn’t stop the urgency you felt to finish before someone walked out and saw you, your eyes closed as you focused on the feeling of his thick fingers hooking up up up and then back out again repeatedly, fast and rough just as his tongue had been in your mouth a moment before.

“Jesus-“ You gasped when his thoroughly soaked fingers retracted to rub tight circles over your clit. He was clearly in his element, you could practically feel the grin on his face right behind you.

“Not quite.”

———

[satureja13]

After dinner, the Boys walked over to the Campeggio 'Fattoria di Lama' (= Camsite 'Old Llama Farm'). The nights at Tartosa are still warm and they look forward to their stay here.

Jack noticed that Sai looked worriedly over to the Castle, where they are supposed to meet Ms Coombes and athena tomorrow afternoon. And where they'll have to discuss the loan for their school fees... Jack: "Hey, let's leave the worries for Tomorrow Afternoon Saiwa, hm? It's been a while since we've been here. Let's not taint it with our problems." Saiwa sighed. Jack is right. He shouldn't dim their mood after such a great day, now that they are all happy together again. Uhhh - maybe he can cuddle with Jeb later in their tent! Sai quickened his pace.

The Boys, the Little Goats and Skully gathered by the fire. Jack started the Tartosa Playlist and Skully sang along. But quietly, to not wake the Little Goats and Kumo, who already fell asleep.

Jack was hungry - again - and started to roast some Veggie Dogs. Vlad never tasted roasted marshmallows before, since he only learned he can eat real food January this year, so Ji Ho shyly showed him how to do it. They are still far from not being awkward around each other. And it doesn't make it easier they can feel through the Bond how the other feels. None of them wants the other to feel pressured and they want to take it slow. Now, they can finally be together, they want the whole package. Getting to know each other, date... They kissed and woohoed already many times before, but it will all be new for Ji Ho, now that he has his feelings back. And new for Vlad, now that Ji Ho is finally able to love him.

After Jack munched his third Veggie Dog, Jack and Kiyoshi stood up. Jeb: "Are you going to sleep already?" Jack: "No, since we only have one bathroom here and it's late, my good mate Kiyoshi and I are going to start with showering and brushing teeth so we all get ready before bedtime. It's quicker when we go together and share the bath." Jeb: "Ah, I see." Sai didn't really listen because he was so excited to spend the night with Jeb <3 And poor Ji Ho burned his mouth, the marshmallow was too hot...

Then it dawned on Sai: "What? You are showering together? I told you we are not going to go down that road again!" Jack: "Tch. What a dirty mind you have. We are mates, Sai, just mates."

Sai calmed down eventually. If Jack and Kiyoshi can take a shower together, Jeb and him can do that all the more!

Meanwhile, in the bathroom. Jack tried to comb through his hair with his fingers and his hand soon became sandy and sticky. He turned and looked in the mirror to catch a view on the back of his head and he saw his tangled strands. Jack: "Gods - how am I supposed to get all that sand and kelp out of my hair?!"

Kiyoshi: "Don't worry, I'm going to give you a hand." And then he pulled Jack into the steaming shower. Jack: "Aouwww, you're a true mate!"

Kiyoshi tried to entangle Jack's strands and remove the sticky kelp. Jack howled: "Ouch! Go easy on me!" Kiyoshi drew back: "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm going to use more produce... I'll be careful."

The open bathroom is right next to the fireplace and the others heard a bottle click open and a squeeze. And then Kiyoshi slicking his hands... Kiyoshi: "Come closer and bend down a bit - then it's easier." Jack: "Like so?" Kiyoshi: "Ah, yes. Exactly like so."

Sai: "Do we really want to allow this - eh... mateship of them? What if Jack goes crazy again? I'll never forget the night he had that nightmare and I will never forget when we had to fear for his life when he fell in that coma when he was about to kill Kiyoshi."

Vlad remembered just too well. Jack is his best friend and he doesn't want him to get hurt again. But he also remembered how Kiyoshi was by his side when he watched over Jack - lying in that pod to keep him alive. And how afraid Kiyoshi was to lose Jack. Jeb pulled them out of their gloomy thoughts: "Kiyoshi won't let Jack get hurt again. He learned his part. And Jack prospered, a lot. They are honest to each other now and care for each other." Our little, naive Ji Ho: "They are mates, just mates."

Jack moaned as Kiyoshi scrubbed his scalp: "Mmmmh - your hands are magic, Kiyoshi..." A little later. Kiyoshi: "Gods, Jack, you have sand everywhere!" Jack squealed and laughed: "That tickles!"

Finally they finished! Jack looked at Kiyoshi in the mirror and he liked what he saw. He couldn't help to admire Kiyoshi. How beautiful he was. You can totally do that as mates. There's nothing wrong with it. Jack: "I'm glad it's you." Kiyoshi: "Are you happy?" Jack: "So happy. You?" Kiyoshi: "Same."

After Jack and Kiyoshi returned to the fireplace, Vlad went alone to the shower and then Ji Ho. No need to rush things. They are going to take their time and slowly approximate to each other. And cherish each and every moment. In their own pace. Sai whereas can't wait to finally lose his virginity! He wiggled on his chair, now it's Jeb and his turn to hit the shower. Jeb: "I let you go first. It's an important day tomorrow." Saiwa blinked: "Eh, thank you..." Sai stood up like in trance and shuffled to the shower. Jeb does not want to shower with him... That reminds him of last year when they were in the same situation right here at the campsite! Argh. Nothing changed!

And when Sai returned, Jeb went to the bathroom. Vlad was still sitting by the fire. They didn't talk and sat quiet for a while. Vlad and Sai share a deep friendship that needs no words and they can sit in silence comfortably. Sai was just planning how he was going to seduce Jeb later in their tent when Vlad called: "Night, Jeb! Take good care of Ji Ho!" Jeb: "Night, you two! Will do!"

What was that? Jeb taking care of Ji Ho? Sai: "Are you not going to share a tent with Ji Ho?" Vlad: "Gods, no. It's too early. When I lie next to him I can't help myself and think about how beautiful he is and how much I want him." Sai: "And?" Vlad: "The Bond, Sai. He can feel what I feel. Not what I think, of course. But he would feel my arousal, for example. I don't want to frighten him off. We're just at the beginning. And we're going home tomorrow. Means, Ji Ho and I are going to need our strength to teleport the TukTuk and it's going to drain us. And he will get travelsick again. I don't want to stress him further." Sure, Sai knows all that about their Bond - but he never thought about how exhausting this must be, and embarrassing ö.Ö' And then it clicked. If Jeb shares a tent with Ji Ho - Jeb is not going to share a tent with him! Argh! It's even worse than last year!

And Skully sang:

'Noi, senza dignità, oltre la montagna scopriamo l'amore. Qui, qui senza falsità, noi ci amiamo come la mente non sa. Noi, senza dignità, oltre la montagna scopriamo l'amore. Qui, qui senza falsità, noi ci amiamo come la.

'Without dignity, we find love beyond the mountains. Here, here without falsehood we love each other in a manner not known by the mind.'

Una Notte Speziale - Alice

Until Sai screamed at him to finally shut up...

From the Beginning 🔱 Underwater Love 🔱 Latest

Current Chapter: 'Here comes the Sun' from the beginning ▶️ here Last Chapter: 'Who killed Jack?' from the beginning ▶️ here

📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 23-28

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

not that i don't appreciate the ones that exist/the fics that do address it bc i do but i need more fix-its for the laugh police scene. ultimately this wasn't a huge deal really, but consider it hurt my feelings specifically and i want FIX-ITS

[hinamie]

idk about yall but life is good again

[ninjautizm]

I don't remember this but HOLY FUCKING SHIIIIIITT LLOYD WAS CONFIRMED TO BE AT LEAST 9 YEARS OLD HERE AND HE WAS ABLE TO DO THAT??? JESUS FUCK

[ingoodjesst]

have you put the pieces together yet, detective

[crowleyholmes]

"I'll never leave you. I'll never leave you again."

[novstie]

it's that time of year again!

[thespoonisvictory]

me when god finally brings me a clone of you as but I have to take a month off work to sit with her in the kitchen and explain all our inside jokes and watch our favorite movies and teach her the world we made up and then I still fucking miss you anyway and then it hits me that I was the problem. and I still can't wake up and talk to you. anyway.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

a merry Between Week to everyone! rest well!

extra layers:

[talkingsandvich]

lebron discovers the chimps experience

[wings-of-ink]

Unto more wilder asks (not that kind 😩🙏🏻)

What if some kind of hocus pocus magic happens and the RO's see a glimpse into parallel universe and they see MC. They thought that MC would have a different fate but really, MC is still sick with some kind of incurable disease (Yeah! Too much fluff going on in the ask, I choose chaos and angst 😤)

Can I just say I love how you answer asks because you take time to craft this cute little scenarios for us to enjoy. It's like a reward for us readers 😌✨

Thank you so much for saying that. I'm glad you are liking the Asks. When I have the time, I really do like putting my mind in them as much as possible for each character. Downside is that it may take a bit of time if I have trouble. Some of them come to me easily and others I have to chew on for a while, but I truly do enjoy them - maybe too much at times!

Guess I'll have to take my fluffy mittens off for this one.

Oswin:  This isn't fair. It's not fair that his MC had to suffer already, but is this really their lot in every life? He can't help but feel that pull between them even though this isn't his MC. It feels like them, like an extension of their soul. Tears gather in his eyes as a sob bubbles up from his throat.

Zahn:  An uncharacteristic bitterness charges through them. As if MC's suffering wasn't enough already. Does that mean there is another Zahn out there too? Will they find each other? This blasted curse was the only reason they met. At least something beautiful came from it, but Zahn would change it all if it meant MC never suffered.

Duri:  Figures. It's always the best people that get the shittiest hand. How many times have they watched that play out and how many times will they be subjected to it again? They can't keep watching this.

Rune:  This isn't their MC…it isn't. They need to stop looking at this and ignore it. MC is fine, their MC is fine now. Stop looking. They bite their lip until they taste blood. Is all of creation really this cruel?

???:  A familiar disgust settles on his heart as he watches. Is nowhere safe for them? Does this mean there is a version of himself in this world too? Are they just as pathetic? Will this version of himself at least help, or will they… He needs to see MC - now. He needs to be sure that they're okay.

Thank you for the ask! I hope these are sad enough to counteract your fluff allergy, lol. ^_^

Just a side note that part of these were written while listening to "What does the Fox Say," and I think I may need to talk about that in therapy to someone, lol.

[skitskatdacat63]

His bullfighting days aren't over quite yet.

+