#but she’s also the only reason i have any level of financial security. she helps me out a lot and i do love her even though she’s ridiculous

[fingertipsmp3]

Ah yes, my favourite time of year: the time when we figure out what the hell to get my grandma for her birthday

[ceasarslegion]

Hey guys

I hate doing this i hate it i really do but, on my last day of work I watched someone get stabbed in the neck and his assailant sprayed bear mace all over the hallway at the security guards trying to tackle him. I've never seen that level of human fear and panic in public before as people scrambled for the exits, nor have I ever felt that suffocated before. Not even the delta variant of COVID made it hurt that much just to breathe. Bear mace is a special kind of agony that I hope none of you ever have to experience. I'm young and healthy and able-bodied so my lungs should be able to bounce back, but that doesn't make me invincible. My eyes are still watering and I still have a bit of a cough, but it seems to be getting better with time.

I'm lucky to live in a country with free physical healthcare if anything gets worse or goes wrong there, so I don't have to worry about that avenue. The main thing I'm having issues with is the mental toll that takes on a person. This incident occurred just days after I dealt with the cops for a different reason when I told off the wrong group of kids for being abusive to a service worker and they kept me holed up in a KFC for over an hour banging at me through the glass and threatening my life if I stepped outside. And after the stabbing incident, our head office wanted us to open up our store and start selling again as if nothing was wrong, as if we were making up excuses to leave early. They won't be covering their staff's mental health nor giving them any hazard pay or time off that our friends at the Starbucks are getting. Therapy isn't covered in Canada.

That was also my last day at that job, and while I have another way better one lined up soon, there's still a gap of unknown (but not long) length between positions during which I'm effectively unemployed while my new supervisor slots me into the next available training course. This was supposed to be a well-earned break for me to rest and relax, but I worry it will be overshadowed by the murky cloud of settling trauma. While I have savings, I have to make them stretch as long and far as possible since I have no income coming in and I don't have a set date for when I will again, just "very soon."

I haven't been able to sleep and I'm too nauseated to eat. I still feel numb and in shock to what I saw and experienced. The lingering bear mace isn't bad enough to be the culprit, as I've slept and eaten through worse colds at this point. I think I'm going to have to book an emergency session with my therapist, but his rates are a bit pricey. I'm going to ask the office about possible payment plans or if things can get at least partially covered under AHS in the event of something like this since it's a threat to my physical health if it's making me rapidly agoraphobic and affecting my ability to take care of my basic needs like sleep and feeding myself. Even if my old work would cover it (highly doubt it), I don't work there anymore. That was the exact date outlined in my resignation letter. It's just a shit situation all around.

But if you guys have the ability to kick me a few extra bucks that will all go towards therapy, I would be forever grateful for it. You don't have to, please don't feel obligated. I've gotten out of worse scraps than this financially, and if all else fails, I can beg my grandmother for some of the hoard of oil money cash that she sits on like a dragon. The problem is that she's incredibly psychologically abusive, but she's the only member of my family who could foot a bill like that on this short of notice. So you don't have to worry that I'll go bankrupt or anything. But for obvious reasons, I'd rather not compile onto the mental health problems I'm experiencing if I can avoid it.

And the job I'm onboarding onto has a fantastic salary and benefits, so I can pay everybody back once I have a reliable source of income again. With the amount of followers I have, even a dollar or a reblog helps immensely. And I won't accept anything that exceeds the amount a session costs if I get that much in cumulative assistance (180 CAD), so it's all going to therapy.

My canadian p**p** is .me/damodrawz if you can spare anything, but don't feel obligated.

Thanks everybody, I hope things get better soon.

[zahri-melitor]

New(ish) Comics: Gotham War Edition

So I’m doing this hey. Going to read a few lead ins I haven’t got to yet then dive in.

Batman #136: Tim is baby here. Bruce is…not doing well. The set up for this conflict is actually reasonably entertaining (aka ‘both Bruce and Selina have been keeping secrets that are causing problems’, the scale of which really pisses off the other). Gosh, that family scene is very much calculated to be circulated as a panel out of context, and I’m wondering if it’s real at all.

I am NOT going to advocate that Bruce needs therapy (folks. FOLKS. The therapy Bruce has had previously has got us into this mess) but I am going to point and laugh at his mental state a lot.

Knight Terrors Batman #1-2: I’m on record as disliking the whole Zur-En-Arrh mythos but at least this storyline is actually revisiting all aspects of it? We got the sensory deprivation tank back. Apparently me reading the entirety of the Black Casebook was actually worth it for something. Golly, this nightmare is so BORING. It’s literally ticking the boxes – lack of control, everyone is dead, replay of Crime Alley, etc. The Gun-Bat (gun-bat. GUN-BAT. ffs) just isn’t convincingly scary. The only interesting twist at ALL was Bruce getting to play as Joe Chill for a bit.

The Arsenal backup – seriously the lack of creativity in everyone’s nightmares SHOWS. Not being able to use the Cry isn’t a nightmare for Dinah, it’s something she understands intimately and knows how to work around. (“Nobody listens to me” is slightly better but also if you just pop your earrings back in Dinah, I am SURE Babs would be happy to go back to obsessively stalking you and being available to talk at any or all hours) Roy being beset by the events of 2010 to present and accompanying costumes is at least meta but it’s still ‘I miss Lian’ (we know, we know, you already lived through your nightmare).

Batman/Catwoman The Gotham War – Battle Lines #1: Maxie Zeus my sweetie!!! Oh wait I’m supposed to care about everything else here, but the fact it’s Tim kicking around Maxie is very satisfying. Love to see Robins against their own period rogues (one of Tim’s first proper times working with Oracle was a Maxie Zeus case).

Okay fine, whatever, Selina’s pitch for how to stop violent crime in Gotham. It’s incredibly silly, as has been widely canvassed, and ignores basic common sense questions like ‘what happens when security increases’, ‘what happens when you run out of these low risk high value targets’, ‘who is fencing all this and how is the increased black market bearing the weight of a higher flow of goods without dropping prices too far’ and ‘how is the entire room of detectives who’ve been operating in Gotham unaware of any changes in crime levels’. The whole club scene is just clearly here to start fracturing the family (yay!).

Wow I hate this version of Montoya I hate it so much, this is so jarring after just having read Gotham Central.

Anyway Selina is getting handed the idiot ball hard here, which is unfortunate, given this issue literally goes ‘here’s the clear point you’ve ignored’ as the last few pages.

Batman #137: Vandal Savage causing problems on purpose! LOVE YOU SAVAGE. (He’s so annoying. Nice to have him as a change to Ra’s) So battle lines are drawn up with Jason in Selina’s camp, Damian in Bruce’s and the rest of them currently in the centre trying to work things out. I still think everyone is being a bit helpless due to this storyline, but we’ll see how it develops.

Catwoman #57: Ehhhhhhh. Jason is weirdly excited about jacking cars here? This is trying SO HARD to position the whole conflict on a classism front and it just doesn’t work for me. “We can just solve financial inequality by Robin Hooding!” uh it doesn’t quite work that way folks. You know what also helps get people out of poverty? Education, healthcare and steady jobs that AREN’T likely to land people in the prison system. Yes also a cash injection can help but your whole training is oriented at continuing to acquire money by criming.

Dick dropping by to go ‘hey do you realise you’re being an idiot? Think about it, Selina’ was cute though.

HELLO SCANDAL PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HAVE A DECENT VERSION OF YOUR PERSONALITY. YOU ARE ALWAYS FUN.

Batman/Catwoman: the Gotham War - Red Hood #1: (the name goes on a bit hey) Can’t believe I’m reading a Red Hood tie in.

It’s pretty ridiculous, but at least Jason is aware this plan is goddamn stupid and is just exploiting it for his own ends?

Ah and there we go, people using guns when they shouldn’t, aka the whole self-defeating part of this whole scenario.

Okay. About to start Batman #138 but will pop that in a separate post with even more spoiler warnings.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Why is Kerrigan Byrne supporting AI?

I don't know.

I'm honestly pretty understanding when it comes to people not initially getting what's going on with AI and the ethical concerns. If you're not pretty online (a lot of authors are--not all) it can be easy to be misinformed. If someone is open to hearing out concerns and then adjusts accordingly, no harm, no foul.

My issue with Kerrigan is that she not only clearly knew going in that this would be controversial, but then acted like she was open for a dialogue, and proceeded to act like an asshole to people critiquing her politely. And then argued that we should all be okay with AI (which steals from artists) because people using it are often using it to get around financial barriers (and I get it, and it sucks, and I face them, but if I stole something I couldn't afford I'd still be charged with a crime) and disabilities.

And that last part... bugs me a lot. Because many artists are in fact disabled. So how the fuck do you get off on saying that it's fine to use AI because it helps you get around a disability, really a weak argument in itself, when that AI could and probably is learning from and processing, uncredited and uncompensated, the work of disabled artists?

(There's also some weird implication there that the only reason why some people aren't art-making is because they're disabled, which in itself is a pretty ableist concept to me, but what do I know.)

At the end of the day, there is no reasoning that justifies depriving artists of any kind of income from their work. Income that, and I say this as someone who currently is fortunate enough to have a career in a creative field that I freelanced in for about ten years before getting a full-time position for, is very difficult to secure.

Anyway, I've also come to understand that Kerrigan has a history of getting into it with readers who critique her work, and I don't have time for that either. She's clearly not willing to take criticism and learn, which is something she'd benefit on multiple levels, considering the fact that she wrote a hero who's a colonizing war criminal. I have no more patience for her.

[duelamort]

who would everyone else be in the f1 au other racers those helper guys on the side or smthn else

. Gwash is the team principal of a new team* in their second season, split from a world renowned team over decisions concerning both the machinery as well as the drivers

*no I will not come up with a placeholder team name because those always stick eventually, no matter how silly

. Hamilton is one of the two drivers, reckless in ways the team really can't afford - they don't drive to win yet, they drive for points and Alex is a talented driver, there's no doubt in that, but he keeps risking points by driving rowdy and potentially having not only him but both of their drivers retire early from races with his high risk decisions. And yes, when he does bring in points he's good, but is it really worth running down cars in two races in a row? Like, how long is this going to be feasible, and honestly why did Washington even renew his contract for this season; just because he personally watched him struggle his way up from his karting days or what? At least Jefferson--

. Jefferson brings in the money the team needs. And yes, maybe his money initially bought him the seat on the team, but he's already proved himself as an equally capable and perhaps even better driver than his father ever was in the team's first season. Not only that, he's also charming enough to start pulling in sponsorships, effectively making him the reason the team keeps running on a financial level. He could make more points if Hamilton didn't keep driving recklessly and fucking him over in his attempts to prove that he's better than Thomas, leading to internal conflict between the two of them that's blatantly obvious even to the press

. Burr is the team's third driver; essentially testing A Car (but let's be real, it's usually Hamilton's) during practice, helping to figure out any kinks and how to improve the machinery for the best possible results during qualifying and the actual races. Rumour has it that he's not going to renew his contract after this season to pursue securing a full race seat with a different team, but he wouldn't actually do that, right?

. Every driver has one designated engineer on the radio with him during races (telling them when to come in for pit stops, how to deal with mechanical issues until they get to stop etc); for Alex it's Laurens and for Thomas it's Lafayette

. Angelica is Alex's long-suffering manager, and it's an open secret that if planet earth was a fair place and F1 not an exclusive sausage fest she'd be the one in the cockpit. And so she perseveres herding a small yappy dog of a man instead.

. Madison is Jefferson's manager, obviously

[aptericia]

***Personal rant, not anything cool***

Making a vent post because I'm still awake at 6am and am very sleep-deprived >:( Also I'm guessing a lot of other people have had similar experiences and that makes me feel better.

So today I was chatting with a close friend who was excited for public schools' break next week. They asked if I had any sort of break (I'm homeschooled) and when I answered no, they said something along the lines of "well, your school is basically like a break anyway, since your workload isn't very high :)" They didn't say it in a resentful way, and I think it's likely that their workload is higher at the moment (I very much Do Not like talking about my personal problems and schoolwork most of the time, so we haven't really compared), but I felt a bit defensive at the comment, so I spent some time thinking about why.

I realized that other comments that have made me feel that way weren't about my homeschooling, but about my decision to pursue an art career. A parent has said "I don't mind if you want to be an artist, but I think you're so smart that you could be doing science or anything else you want to." A sibling has said to my face that they could never be satisfied going into art/entertainment even though they enjoy it, because they want a job that does good for the world. The advisor at the community college where I take classes made jokes to me about how if my sister got a good job, she could financially support me when I become a starving artist. I feel like I'm constantly being reminded that I'll grow up to be a lazy, unaccomplished burden--and that it's because of my choice to take such an easy, meaningless job.

Sometimes my lifestyle feels like that as well. As a homeschooled student, I have a lot of flexibility. I get to choose when I wake up in the morning, what classes I take, etc. Although I have problems with sleep and mental health, I constantly see worse talked about on the internet, or by my friends. I'm also extremely privileged--in addition to being homeschooled, I'm able-bodied, cisgender, White-passing, and a native citizen. I'm financially secure and have a supportive home life. My atheism and aromanticism, while not the "default" by society's standards, can be swept under the rug more easily than some identities. I feel like have the environment to take on a lot of work and accomplish a lot, so if I'm not doing that, it must be because I'm lazy.

In my worst moods, I feel almost betrayed. I want to say to my parents and teachers, "if art is such a shameful career, why did you encourage me? Why did you make me think it was okay?" or "why didn't you make me work harder and do things I hate doing? Now I'm not used to effort and hardship." I start to wish I didn't have so many privileges, or that I was abused, so that I would have a reason for slacking off so much (yes, I know that's messed up and unfair to people who have had to deal with those things).

On a purely personal level, I usually feel that I have balanced my work and rest reasonably well. I get good grades, I know basic things like how to buy stuff and cook and look up what I don't know, and I take breaks for my mental health. However, other people's expectations still affect me (and even if that weren't true, I wouldn't feel comfortable trusting only my own judgement). Although I'm meeting the requirements I feel like I need to, I'm still scared that I'll be completely unprepared for adulthood due to being "spoiled" so much as a kid. I still feel guilty that I appear to be doing so much less work than my peers. And I still feel like a failure for not doing more to "help the world".

Anywayyyy rant over, but I'm genuinely curious to hear what other people think. I'm sure other artists, privileged minors, etc have similar feelings, so how have you dealt with them? Do I sound completely nutty and make no sense? XD

[triviareads]

ARC Review of Bed Me, Earl by Felicity Niven

Rating: 3.75/5 Heat Level: 3.5/5 Publication Date: November 9th

Premise:

Lady Caroline Haskett knows she will never marry, but she wants one night of pleasure with her brother's friend, Phineas, the Earl of Burchester. Phineas has no idea who she is after their one night together, but when he finds out, he quickly decides he wants to see more of her, any way he can.

My review:

This book felt quieter and more introspective compared to the two previous books in Felicity's Bed Me series. A part of that is because the external plot is fairly staid— they meet, there are some fundamental misunderstandings, they marry, and then finally come to love and understand one another. Another reason is because Caro has a lisp and a stutter (which the author wrote out phonetically in dialogue), and as a result she does not speak very much and a lot of her development is internal. It doesn't help that her father ensured she was isolated from society because he was ashamed, and that insecurity runs deep within Caro.

That insecurity also rolls over into her perceptions of love. Caro is self-possessed and very determined when she wants something (see: her initial seduction of Phineas), but she fundamentally doesn't believe anyone could love her, nor does she wish to love anyone because of the example her parents set for her. It was a little heartbreaking to read Caro agree to marry Phineas when she doubts that he truly understands her and thinks he will cheat as soon as he tires of her.

Phineas is a himbo hero; unserious, genial, and very much a sybarite. In some ways he is the partner Caro needs because he's honest and openly affectionate and nonjudgemental, but his attitude predictably hinders him as well. Caro does not take him seriously when he tells her he wants to marry her and tbh, neither did I, especially when he initially claimed to love her while barely knowing her.

I did come to appreciate the financial subplot that took up most of the latter half of the story— Phineas is spending beyond his means and Caro's disappointment in him and her brother for not making her aware of this before marriage felt all to real for the time period. Also, I DEEPLY appreciate the "you're pulling out until we're financially secure enough to have children" moment this led to. Again, it feels very realistic, and also, it made me laugh.

The sex:

Felicity Niven heroines tend to be super frank about their sexual wants in a way I find refreshing for the genre, and that pattern continues here starting with Caro swanning into Phin's bedchamber in the middle of the night and basically communicating her intentions by letting Phin grope her. This actually starts a pattern of communicating-by-way-of-groping which does go a bit awry when it ends with him dragging her to a corner of a bookshop for sex lol.

Felicity Niven had teased that Phineas uses the third person to refer to himself in bed. I was initially unsure how well that would work going into the book, but I can honestly say it did. Phin's a dirty talker and a talker in general, and Caro loves that.

Caro has a praise kink and a praise kink only; she genuinely does not like being called "bad" or "naughty" in bed and I'm glad Phin clocked that because she couldn't quite communicate that herself. Also, she has a spectacle fetish.

Bed Me, Baron had a couple who used sex as means of communication when other means of communicating failed them, but I think this book has a couple who have sex despite their inability to communicate. Even when they were in the depths of a misunderstanding, they had sex, however, it still emotionally dishonest if that makes sense. Caro and Phin actually had to talk it out afterwards

Overall:

Overall, I enjoyed Phin and Caro's romance. I think there were some middle bits, particularly after their marriage that felt like they dragged a little for me, but overall, this was another solid addition to Felicity Niven's Bed Me series and I look forward to the next books!

[maaagnetize]

Cobra Pose: Yoga Mat Mysteries by Susan Rogers & John Roosen

 Book Summary:

Australia is a surfers’ paradise … but this nefarious surfing on the ‘net’ … will destroy the global financial system.

It’s not just a rippling ‘scam’ job. Has Australia been infiltrated at levels they’ve never known?

 Elaina Williams uses a Cobra Pose in her Yoga studio to boost her energy – she will need it! Elaina’s father, Edward, is in trouble. He’s disappeared.

 As a solicitor and now yoga instructor, Elaina drags Ric, a man she’s fallen for, into the bursting web of techno-thrilling intrigue.

 Ric Peters has just returned from a disastrous trip to Indonesia. Ric bills himself as a photojournalist. Elaina suspects he shoots more than just photographs. Ric has insight into the journey he and Elaina must take. He knows Elaina isn’t ready for what’s going to happen. There are too many moving parts for him to control.

 Time is running out before The Cobra and The Wolf strike with their heist. They are extending their fangs towards Australia’s ‘golden coastline’ to bite into and destabilise financial institutions worldwide.

 The sparkling sub-tropical city of Brisbane, Queensland, is the epicentre of this hacking tsunami of the century! But these hackers are good at hiding. They make a living out of it. They are submerged Phantoms leaving no tracks.

Can the burgeoning amateur sleuth Elaina piece this puzzle together before her father’s fate is sealed? How far is Ric willing to go in deciding to save Elaina … or Australia?

 Cobra Pose is the suspense-thriller and second novel in the Yoga Mat Mysteries series. This book is filled with a snappy plot, dynamic prose, witty dialogue, and slow-burn chemistry. You’ll love Susan Rogers and John Roosen’s atmospheric whodunit. Click Cobra Pose to stretch your sense of adventure today!

 Buy the Book – Amazon

 Reviews:

Elaina Williams and Ric Peters are back at it in the second installment of the Yoga Mat series, Cobra Pose. This time, things hit even closer to home when Elaina’s father, Dr. Edward Williams goes missing. After Elaina doesn’t hear from her father in a week, she calls Ric up to enlist him in helping her find the doctor. In a note he had left her, he had said he was going bushwalking but did not leave any dates or other information. Elaina leaves her staff at Yoga Boronia to run the business and goes from Sydney to Brisbane with Ric to find her father. Knowing that her father is adept at technology, specifically cyber-security and data protection, Elaina starts to put the clues together and realizes her father may have been kidnapped by someone who has a use for his skillset.

 There are so many well-thought-out parts to this book as in the first book. I love the relationship between Elaina and Ric although at times it seems that Ric is distracted and gives Elaina mixed messages. His obsession with only the best coffee and his taking up of tea draw humor into the book because Ric is such a masculine character. It is clear they both still care for one another. The scenery the characters pass through as they complete their adventure is descriptive yet not overbearing to the point it will bore the reader. The clues that Dr. Williams leaves Elaina are realistic, yet make the reader feel like there is a Nancy Drew element strewn throughout. The kidnappers who have different backgrounds each have very specific characteristics as well and the dialogue between the characters brings them to life. Elaina’s Uncle Max intercepts his way into the story when Ric and Elaina run into him after searching her father’s house. As Max’s dual identity reveals itself, the big guns are called in to help. Both Ric and Max’s backgrounds are very secretive, however, it is clear that they have resources at their disposal. I also love how a dummy yoga studio is created to bait the hackers/kidnappers. Genius!

 With the latest Australian cyber-attacks occurring, this book delves into the topic of cyber hacking and the reason that cyber security is so important, both personally and in business. Cobra Pose is a cat-and-mouse game full of action, adventure, and danger. With twists and turns throughout the plot and a tearjerker moment that puts readers into a final stage of suspense, authors Rogers and Roosen have put together yet another fantastic thriller.  

Reviewed By: Kristi Elizabeth, San Francisco Book Review

  About the Authors

What do a woman, who used to train military personnel how to shoot straight, and a man, skilled at eradicating all sorts of hazardous materials safely, have in common? Both were designated law enforcement officers and they have now written two ‘knock ’em dead’ books … together!

 John Roosen started his career as a biologist, served as a commissioned naval officer and environmental emergency specialist in the United States, and has lived and worked in Australasia, Antarctica, the Americas and the Middle East. At a moment’s notice, he would respond to chemical and refinery plant explosions, deal with rocket fuel plant meltdowns and dismantle illegal drug labs. With Susan, John delivered international security and safety training against terrorism to ports in the Pacific. As a change-up, John switched careers to chasing pirates and duelling with a con artist extraordinaire on a remote South Pacific island. In between, he organised jungle expeditions and deep-sea scuba diving. However, John’s experience extends beyond responding to cataclysmic disasters and includes mastering the intricacies of making soufflé omelettes without burning the edges.

 Susan Rogers already knew she was a writer at age six, but her life took a major detour when she became a commissioned naval officer. As a designated law enforcement officer, she was boarding ships at sea and conducting structural and safety inspections. In addition, she developed civil defence programs for civilian populations. With John, Susan orchestrated sting operations. Susan also ran extensive weapons training programs and managed emergency responses for natural and man-made disasters. Susan worked in Australasia, the Pacific, the Americas and the Middle East. While posted in Abu Dhabi, she ran health and safety operations for multi-billion-dollar projects along the Persian Gulf. In her spare time, she directed the restoration of a Presidential yacht. In between, she has written several books and revamped a South Pacific maritime service. Susan continues to write: whether braced against the hull of a sailing vessel on a hard tack, during a crossing of the Middle East’s empty quarter in a Mini or bouncing around in a troop carrier in Australia’s outback.

 After writing Surviving Paradise about their life in the South Pacific, John and Susan hatched their Yoga Mat Mysteries series. Dead Man’s Pose is first in the line-up, with Cobra Pose as the second book. Next will be Tree Pose – coming soon!

[roobylavender]

care to share the books lol ? i myself am trying to get thru my tbr … it’s not looking too good 😞

the mid: one night wife by ainslie paton / i am aware this sounds terrible but in fairness the set-up justifies it a bit lol. basically it's about a girl trying to get her charity program off of the ground and miserably failing until one night she catches the eye of this guy who's a professional grifter masquerading as a venture capitalist. he grifts rich people and redistributes the earnings to the poor. and he decides to help her out by using her as his "one night wife" to scam all of these so-called rich people by pandering to them together as a charming couple. except she doesn't know she's being used. and ofc they'll fall in love with each other. etc etc. the premise genuinely is very interesting but idk for some reason i can't connect to the characters. paton was a journalist before she went into fiction writing so everything is very fast-paced and to the detriment of really developing any investment in the characters

the terrible: the mis-arrangement of sana saeed by noreen mughees / so this girl is thirty three and unmarried (shame! shame!) which would not normally be a problem except that her mother won't name her as her autistic brother's future guardian unless she's married bc financial and emotional security or whatever. so she goes through your standard string of rishta meetings. all the while pining for her childhood friend whom she hasn't seen in like eighteen years bc their families fell out with each other and he moved away. except that at work she gets assigned to this new project with the deputy attorney general of the state and lo and behold it's said childhood friend. but she doesn't know that bc he changed his name and it's been eighteen years. but he knows who she is. and they're going to fall in love or whatever. i'm not very far through this one but the mc grates on me bc she's ridiculously immature for someone her age. some of it comes down to personal preference i suppose bc i'm kind of fed up with desi women's obsession with austen and finding their perfect darcy/wentworth adjacent prince who will sweep them off of their feet. not that desi women aren't entitled to that kind of love but the way the mc narrates it she sounds positively juvenile and i can't take it seriously. also i'm already getting inclinations that her autistic brother is barely a character and merely a plot device so that's swell. and the icing on the cake is ofc the full display of deranged and exaggerative desi family dynamics bc what else do we have to display of our culture but obsessive marital practices

the long, but good: the zoya factor by anuja chauhan / interestingly this one is the most wish-fulfillment aligned of all three of these but the execution of the premise is so well done and it clearly knows how to handle its whimsy so i'm genuinely enjoying it. the mc works in advertising and she gets roped into working on a photo campaign with the national indian cricket team. the captain of the team is ofc a surface-level ass uninterested in the campaign and intent for the team to focus on practice bc they've been on a bit of a losing streak. one day the mc ends up having breakfast with the team and she lets slip that she was born the very minute india last won the world cup so her family has always joked she's lucky. the very same day the team ends up winning their game. so word gets loose and suddenly there's this outcry from the public and the team that she has to become their mascot and permanent good-luck charm. except that the captain is obv still an ass and a very hardcore believer in "my results are only the product of my work ethic and never a concept so ridiculously amorphous as luck" so there's some head-butting involved. the fame is going to go to her head, the captain's going to try to keep her grounded all the while falling in love with her bc she is all things considered relentlessly charming, and there will ultimately be the question of whether it's entirely healthy to place so much self-worth in the idea of your own necessity to someone rather than relying more on the idea that they want you for who you are. it's very good stuff and to make things even funnier the mc constantly compares the captain's eyes to chocolate-flavored boost energy drinks which i personally think is a fabulous jab at authors' tendency to describe eye colors with food items. so i'm having a lot of fun

[unendingbooklist]

Cobra Pose: Yoga Mat Mysteries by Susan Rogers & John Roosen

 Book Summary:

Australia is a surfers’ paradise … but this nefarious surfing on the ‘net’ … will destroy the global financial system.

It’s not just a rippling ‘scam’ job. Has Australia been infiltrated at levels they’ve never known?

Elaina Williams uses a Cobra Pose in her Yoga studio to boost her energy – she will need it! Elaina’s father, Edward, is in trouble. He’s disappeared.

As a solicitor and now yoga instructor, Elaina drags Ric, a man she’s fallen for, into the bursting web of techno-thrilling intrigue.

Ric Peters has just returned from a disastrous trip to Indonesia. Ric bills himself as a photojournalist. Elaina suspects he shoots more than just photographs. Ric has insight into the journey he and Elaina must take. He knows Elaina isn’t ready for what’s going to happen. There are too many moving parts for him to control.

Time is running out before The Cobra and The Wolf strike with their heist. They are extending their fangs towards Australia’s ‘golden coastline’ to bite into and destabilise financial institutions worldwide.

The sparkling sub-tropical city of Brisbane, Queensland, is the epicentre of this hacking tsunami of the century! But these hackers are good at hiding. They make a living out of it. They are submerged Phantoms leaving no tracks.

Can the burgeoning amateur sleuth Elaina piece this puzzle together before her father’s fate is sealed? How far is Ric willing to go in deciding to save Elaina … or Australia?

Cobra Pose is the suspense-thriller and second novel in the Yoga Mat Mysteries series. This book is filled with a snappy plot, dynamic prose, witty dialogue, and slow-burn chemistry. You’ll love Susan Rogers and John Roosen’s atmospheric whodunit. Click Cobra Pose to stretch your sense of adventure today!

 Buy the Book – Amazon

 Reviews:

Elaina Williams and Ric Peters are back at it in the second installment of the Yoga Mat series, Cobra Pose. This time, things hit even closer to home when Elaina’s father, Dr. Edward Williams goes missing. After Elaina doesn’t hear from her father in a week, she calls Ric up to enlist him in helping her find the doctor. In a note he had left her, he had said he was going bushwalking but did not leave any dates or other information. Elaina leaves her staff at Yoga Boronia to run the business and goes from Sydney to Brisbane with Ric to find her father. Knowing that her father is adept at technology, specifically cyber-security and data protection, Elaina starts to put the clues together and realizes her father may have been kidnapped by someone who has a use for his skillset.

There are so many well-thought-out parts to this book as in the first book. I love the relationship between Elaina and Ric although at times it seems that Ric is distracted and gives Elaina mixed messages. His obsession with only the best coffee and his taking up of tea draw humor into the book because Ric is such a masculine character. It is clear they both still care for one another. The scenery the characters pass through as they complete their adventure is descriptive yet not overbearing to the point it will bore the reader. The clues that Dr. Williams leaves Elaina are realistic, yet make the reader feel like there is a Nancy Drew element strewn throughout. The kidnappers who have different backgrounds each have very specific characteristics as well and the dialogue between the characters brings them to life. Elaina’s Uncle Max intercepts his way into the story when Ric and Elaina run into him after searching her father’s house. As Max’s dual identity reveals itself, the big guns are called in to help. Both Ric and Max’s backgrounds are very secretive, however, it is clear that they have resources at their disposal. I also love how a dummy yoga studio is created to bait the hackers/kidnappers. Genius!

With the latest Australian cyber-attacks occurring, this book delves into the topic of cyber hacking and the reason that cyber security is so important, both personally and in business. Cobra Pose is a cat-and-mouse game full of action, adventure, and danger. With twists and turns throughout the plot and a tearjerker moment that puts readers into a final stage of suspense, authors Rogers and Roosen have put together yet another fantastic thriller. 

 Reviewed By: Kristi Elizabeth, San Francisco Book Review

  About the Authors

What do a woman, who used to train military personnel how to shoot straight, and a man, skilled at eradicating all sorts of hazardous materials safely, have in common? Both were designated law enforcement officers and they have now written two ‘knock ’em dead’ books … together!

John Roosen started his career as a biologist, served as a commissioned naval officer and environmental emergency specialist in the United States, and has lived and worked in Australasia, Antarctica, the Americas and the Middle East. At a moment’s notice, he would respond to chemical and refinery plant explosions, deal with rocket fuel plant meltdowns and dismantle illegal drug labs. With Susan, John delivered international security and safety training against terrorism to ports in the Pacific. As a change-up, John switched careers to chasing pirates and duelling with a con artist extraordinaire on a remote South Pacific island. In between, he organised jungle expeditions and deep-sea scuba diving. However, John’s experience extends beyond responding to cataclysmic disasters and includes mastering the intricacies of making soufflé omelettes without burning the edges.

Susan Rogers already knew she was a writer at age six, but her life took a major detour when she became a commissioned naval officer. As a designated law enforcement officer, she was boarding ships at sea and conducting structural and safety inspections. In addition, she developed civil defence programs for civilian populations. With John, Susan orchestrated sting operations. Susan also ran extensive weapons training programs and managed emergency responses for natural and man-made disasters. Susan worked in Australasia, the Pacific, the Americas and the Middle East. While posted in Abu Dhabi, she ran health and safety operations for multi-billion-dollar projects along the Persian Gulf. In her spare time, she directed the restoration of a Presidential yacht. In between, she has written several books and revamped a South Pacific maritime service. Susan continues to write: whether braced against the hull of a sailing vessel on a hard tack, during a crossing of the Middle East’s empty quarter in a Mini or bouncing around in a troop carrier in Australia’s outback.

After writing Surviving Paradise about their life in the South Pacific, John and Susan hatched their Yoga Mat Mysteries series. Dead Man’s Pose is first in the line-up, with Cobra Pose as the second book. Next will be Tree Pose – coming soon!

[bluntshroom]

Cobra Pose: Yoga Mat Mysteries by Susan Rogers & John Roosen

 Book Summary:

Australia is a surfers’ paradise … but this nefarious surfing on the ‘net’ … will destroy the global financial system.

It’s not just a rippling ‘scam’ job. Has Australia been infiltrated at levels they’ve never known?

Elaina Williams uses a Cobra Pose in her Yoga studio to boost her energy – she will need it! Elaina’s father, Edward, is in trouble. He’s disappeared.

As a solicitor and now yoga instructor, Elaina drags Ric, a man she’s fallen for, into the bursting web of techno-thrilling intrigue.

Ric Peters has just returned from a disastrous trip to Indonesia. Ric bills himself as a photojournalist. Elaina suspects he shoots more than just photographs. Ric has insight into the journey he and Elaina must take. He knows Elaina isn’t ready for what’s going to happen. There are too many moving parts for him to control.

Time is running out before The Cobra and The Wolf strike with their heist. They are extending their fangs towards Australia’s ‘golden coastline’ to bite into and destabilise financial institutions worldwide.

The sparkling sub-tropical city of Brisbane, Queensland, is the epicentre of this hacking tsunami of the century! But these hackers are good at hiding. They make a living out of it. They are submerged Phantoms leaving no tracks.

Can the burgeoning amateur sleuth Elaina piece this puzzle together before her father’s fate is sealed? How far is Ric willing to go in deciding to save Elaina … or Australia?

Cobra Pose is the suspense-thriller and second novel in the Yoga Mat Mysteries series. This book is filled with a snappy plot, dynamic prose, witty dialogue, and slow-burn chemistry. You’ll love Susan Rogers and John Roosen’s atmospheric whodunit. Click Cobra Pose to stretch your sense of adventure today!

 Buy the Book – Amazon

 Reviews:

Elaina Williams and Ric Peters are back at it in the second installment of the Yoga Mat series, Cobra Pose. This time, things hit even closer to home when Elaina’s father, Dr. Edward Williams goes missing. After Elaina doesn’t hear from her father in a week, she calls Ric up to enlist him in helping her find the doctor. In a note he had left her, he had said he was going bushwalking but did not leave any dates or other information. Elaina leaves her staff at Yoga Boronia to run the business and goes from Sydney to Brisbane with Ric to find her father. Knowing that her father is adept at technology, specifically cyber-security and data protection, Elaina starts to put the clues together and realizes her father may have been kidnapped by someone who has a use for his skillset.

There are so many well-thought-out parts to this book as in the first book. I love the relationship between Elaina and Ric although at times it seems that Ric is distracted and gives Elaina mixed messages. His obsession with only the best coffee and his taking up of tea draw humor into the book because Ric is such a masculine character. It is clear they both still care for one another. The scenery the characters pass through as they complete their adventure is descriptive yet not overbearing to the point it will bore the reader. The clues that Dr. Williams leaves Elaina are realistic, yet make the reader feel like there is a Nancy Drew element strewn throughout. The kidnappers who have different backgrounds each have very specific characteristics as well and the dialogue between the characters brings them to life. Elaina’s Uncle Max intercepts his way into the story when Ric and Elaina run into him after searching her father’s house. As Max’s dual identity reveals itself, the big guns are called in to help. Both Ric and Max’s backgrounds are very secretive, however, it is clear that they have resources at their disposal. I also love how a dummy yoga studio is created to bait the hackers/kidnappers. Genius!

With the latest Australian cyber-attacks occurring, this book delves into the topic of cyber hacking and the reason that cyber security is so important, both personally and in business. Cobra Pose is a cat-and-mouse game full of action, adventure, and danger. With twists and turns throughout the plot and a tearjerker moment that puts readers into a final stage of suspense, authors Rogers and Roosen have put together yet another fantastic thriller. 

 Reviewed By: Kristi Elizabeth, San Francisco Book Review

  About the Authors

What do a woman, who used to train military personnel how to shoot straight, and a man, skilled at eradicating all sorts of hazardous materials safely, have in common? Both were designated law enforcement officers and they have now written two ‘knock ’em dead’ books … together!

John Roosen started his career as a biologist, served as a commissioned naval officer and environmental emergency specialist in the United States, and has lived and worked in Australasia, Antarctica, the Americas and the Middle East. At a moment’s notice, he would respond to chemical and refinery plant explosions, deal with rocket fuel plant meltdowns and dismantle illegal drug labs. With Susan, John delivered international security and safety training against terrorism to ports in the Pacific. As a change-up, John switched careers to chasing pirates and duelling with a con artist extraordinaire on a remote South Pacific island. In between, he organised jungle expeditions and deep-sea scuba diving. However, John’s experience extends beyond responding to cataclysmic disasters and includes mastering the intricacies of making soufflé omelettes without burning the edges.

Susan Rogers already knew she was a writer at age six, but her life took a major detour when she became a commissioned naval officer. As a designated law enforcement officer, she was boarding ships at sea and conducting structural and safety inspections. In addition, she developed civil defence programs for civilian populations. With John, Susan orchestrated sting operations. Susan also ran extensive weapons training programs and managed emergency responses for natural and man-made disasters. Susan worked in Australasia, the Pacific, the Americas and the Middle East. While posted in Abu Dhabi, she ran health and safety operations for multi-billion-dollar projects along the Persian Gulf. In her spare time, she directed the restoration of a Presidential yacht. In between, she has written several books and revamped a South Pacific maritime service. Susan continues to write: whether braced against the hull of a sailing vessel on a hard tack, during a crossing of the Middle East’s empty quarter in a Mini or bouncing around in a troop carrier in Australia’s outback.

After writing Surviving Paradise about their life in the South Pacific, John and Susan hatched their Yoga Mat Mysteries series. Dead Man’s Pose is first in the line-up, with Cobra Pose as the second book. Next will be Tree Pose – coming soon!

[mademoisellehypergamy]

This may be along letter but I have to share it with you qnd I know that U can help me and you will do ur best 🤍

First thing, Im going and Ive gone through alots of spiritual change, mental and just personality change like alots ... and the thing is now is time for me to let go of things and discover new things, for example fangirl life, twitter idk kpop, those common interests but in the same time idk how or what shall I do, Im here to take some of your advice since u are such an inspiring woman to me.

+ As I grow up, Im the youngest child in family and the only girl, my family, my bros made me like I cant do anything right, My opinions are always wrong and I just cant live on my own, so I end up  being too scared to see new things or take any decision cuz maybe " its wrong " " who said is right " idk is just too unsure and scared that I cant do it, and Im always wrong even in the little things like " i like apple " they made me feel like a fool, childish for liking it ... or even in the small things they alwqys make fun of me smh, and Im very sensitive too. So if u have any advice on how u became the person u are or if u can share with me u know ur tips ur daily life becuz I really want to learn from and U always inspired me.

Also in the feminine side, my mom was never interested in these things cuz she is naturally feminine and pretty ... so if u have any tips share it with me darling 🤍 ( like how to generally take care of my body / washing, vagina / im also so hairy so it makes me feel a bit insecured too )

I hope if u can share with us alots of ur wisdom and thoughts and everything and pls advice me how to grow from this circle and end it to be a powerful women 💖

Note: Im 18 yo

Hi love,

Awww, reading your message reminded me of my younger sister 🥰 I’m sorry it took so long to reply back to your message. I hope this will help you. In the future I will make a more detailed post about hygiene, but this will help you get started.

🌸 Mademoiselle Hypergamy’s Basic Hygiene Tips 🌸

🌸 Shower Daily. You may have to shower more depending on how active you are, the climate you’re in, and how much you sweat.

Your shower routine should include:

- Washing your ENTIRE body. Your feet/in between your toes, behind your ears, your buttocks, everything! - Use soap. Alright, this sounds silly, but when I was in college I had a roommate who never showered with soap. Please use soap. Use it with a loofah/washcloth/silicone bath brush/etc.

🌸Incorporate Dry Brushing. Do this prior to showering on dry skin. This will help prevent cellulite and keep your skin smooth and firm as you age.

🌸Wash Your Vagina. Do not put soap in the vagina! You can use a gentle cleanser/pH balanced feminine wash (I recommend Rael Natural, vH Essentials, Organyc) on the exterior vaginal area. Never use soap inside the vagina, just water! Click here to watch a video to see the actual motions. *The video isn’t graphic, but I wouldn’t recommend watching it in public lol*  

🌸 Remove Body Hair. Shaving is probably the most accessible way to remove body hair at 18. If you are able to, I would recommend waxing or sugaring (especially if you want to remove pubic hair). Eventually, I’d recommend laser hair removal because it REALLY makes a difference! Be consistent about removing underarm hair if you struggle with body odor.

- Use body scrubs prior to shaving to prevent in-grown hairs and “strawberry legs”.  - Always shave with a fresh razor.

🌸Use Rich Creams After Showers/Baths. Always use thick, luxurious creams on your skin to keep it hydrated!

🌸 Wash Your Hair When Needed. Washing your hair every day is not good! Wash it when it’s very oily/dirty. Invest in quality products. Always use conditioner. 

🌸 Deodorant. Use it! There’s a variety on the market to choose from :) 

Some other just general tips I have to take care of your body: - Work out. Even if it’s just walking. Aim to do this 3x a week. - Drink. Water. I can’t stress this enough! - Use sunscreen. Everyday. You’ll thank me later. - Sleep; Unless you are a student studying for an important exam, there is no reason you should be staying up every night.  - Maintain your hands and feet. Make sure your nails are clean. Make sure your skin is hydrated. 

As for your family, it’s important to keep in mind that although they matter, at the end of the day you came into this world alone and you will leave alone. You must be able to rely on yourself, and that begins with trusting yourself. If you continue to let them influence you, you will never be able to achieve your full potential. 

They may have filled you with doubt, but I promise you that trusting yourself is the best decision. Sure, you can listen to their input, but your choices at the end of the day is the most important. Start by making small decisions for yourself (who you’ll hang out with, what hobbies you’ll pursue), and when you see that the decision ended up positive, it’ll be easier to trust yourself.

As for myself, I became the way I am by deciding that I was going to live life on my terms. Just like when someone decides to be a lawyer, they go to college, take the LSAT, then law school. I made that decision, and began to live my life accordingly. ❤️ 

The only thing you must do is decide to be hypergamous, and then make a plan. Level up. Be smart. Be financially and mentally secure. Don’t settle. Only date men who align with your vision. Realize almost everyone around you can help you get from point A to point Z. 

You also never have to give up your interests (like Kpop). If you enjoy it and it doesn’t hurt anyone, keep it. Just add some hobbies/interests :)

Good luck!

[faerienextdoor]

general relationship hcs with (some) pastas

Fair warning, I'm using and hinting at mine and my friends’ writing for these creeps :) enjoy  also as soon as i figure out how to open an ask box, I’ll be accepting requests

Brian:

- oh where to start with this absolute himbo

- he melts around you. like he's your bitch, and you're his.

- he's the type of boyfriend that takes you out in the snow and shoves a handful down the back of your jacket, and laughs until you shove snow in his face

- it is snow war

- it ends with you cuddling him, wrapped in a blanket and content in front of the burning fire he got started just for you <3

- but he also has some weird... habits.

- drinks pickle juice.

- gets his hand stuck in the jar.

- looks at you like 🥺 until you sigh and help him. for the fifteenth time.

- he can cook some basic breakfast foods, and happily breaks out a cookbook to prepare you something as a surprise or to learn something with you!!

- baking with him would be a mess. he forgets flour goes everywhere and now you both look like you took a bath in cocaine

- but the cupcakes are mediocre at best. they aren't absolute garbage, so... cupcake points!

- he worries about how hoodie treats you. he doesn't remember anything when he regains control, but you've reassured him hoodie is just fine.

- and he is

(hoodie)

- hoodie is like a rottweiler or a doberman.

- protective. intimidating. energetic.

- but also a giant fucking baby.

- this large ass man lumbers over and drops to his knees. places his chin on your lap and stares at you from the fabric of his mask until you stop what you're doing and stroke his head awkwardly

- you could swear he does those happy grumbled a rottie does.

- hoodie is silent but shows he loves you just as much as brian does. He strokes your hair silently, even places a kiss to the crown of your head as you sink into his beefy arms.

- he smells nice too. surprisingly.

- but that raises the question: if hoodie showers, does he shower with that damn thing on?

- you won't get an answer if you were to ask.

- brian introduces you to his grandma julia. and she dotes on you.

- the immortal old lady remarks that you’re the best s/o brian has brought to her yet.

Tim:

- a lumberjack man with biceps like a fucking tree trunk

- how'd you land him? give me your secrets (/j)

- he's such a love bug. a tired stressed love bug.

- he finds /every/ excuse to have physical contact with you. it's like a little touch from you reassures him that you're real. you're like a dream to him.

- he's the best for cuddles. He holds you to his chest

- and you get special access to his moobs

- and he gently strokes your head, traces shapes into your back, etc. it's a special intimate moment each time.

- my man's is italian-american but can't cook to save his fucken life

- he always gets your favorite microwave meals though!! he never forgets.

- not feeling good? dw baby he's making it for you <33 shitty low tier bean and cheese burrito coming up

- slowly he learns the basics and surprises you with lunch or even dinner if you're lucky!!

- he loves you so much. and wants you to feel it and know it. all the time.

(masky)

- god where to start with this bitch

- he's not jeff levels of bad ofc, but he's silent and... weird. creepy, some may say. he doesn't mean to be.

- and he's a hard ass. far more strict than tim.

- he follows you around like a giant fucken puppy and will spook you by grabbing you abruptly and holding you tightly

- you can't escape him. he really utilizes his physical strength

- he loves lifting you up and just... holding you. or carrying you off.

- protective and overbearing.

- but tim keeps him under control.

(angst)

- he wouldn't want to lose you like he lost his last wife.

- you find pictures of a woman laying around and a small girl that bears a striking resemblance to her and tim.

- tim goes quiet and questioned but eventually caves and tells you about his family

- or what he used to have

- his wife died and his daughter disappeared.

- it broke him and you're all he has left now

- constantly needs your affection in return to his own

- pls love him

jeff:

- why the fuck would you date him

- he's the absolute worst in so many aspects. But he genuinely tries for you.

- even if his gifts are shitty, it's nice to know he thoughts of you, right? even if it's a half dead flower or a rib torn from a deer caraccas.

- but you get the butt end of his shithead antics. ranch bath, specifically. he smelt like spoiled milk for a week after and you had to cuddle that fucker.

- and don't get me started on mayo bath

- but he still loves finding himself in your arms. or finding you in his. he's demanding affection wise, and will yank you into him for some cuddles. whether you like it or not.

- he isn't one for a lot of pet names, but calls you curse words or "sweetheart" in polish.

- and you get to see the side of him that only shows when he breaks down.

(bit of angst)

- he misses his family and the life he used to have. he'll reminisce what it was like in poland with his mom and family with you, and you sometimes swear you can see his brown eyes gloss over at the memory of her.

- he never talks about his dad, you've noticed.

- don't ask.

- he brushes off heavy conversations with some dumb quip ("wanna see my renegade?")

- he sucks at cooking. god awful at it. but he really tries for you. manages a bowl of oat meal that's edible.

- but he overloads it with sugar and for some reason, salt.

- he's confused. he thinks that's normal (it isn't)

- his idea of a date is napping with you. or rather, forcing you into nap time.

- I mean it when I say this man is strong in a weird fucken way. latches onto you with that iron grip and you won't be able to leave for at least a few hours.

jane:

- ethereal wlw woman.

- could break you with her heels. or a flutter of what eyelashes she has.

- you're lucky to have her, and she's just as lucky to have you!

- she's sweet and charming. very smooth and takes good care of you.

- her love language is a mix of physical touch and acts of service.

- she'll cuddle you all night, and then make you breakfast in the morning.

- she loves showering with you when she's comfy enough around you! it's super intimate and she washes your hair.

- massages the soap into your hair, suds spilling down your neck and back as her fingers scrub circles into your scalp.

- it's heaven on earth. such a domestic life.

- it'll take a while for her to settle enough in the relationship for you to see her without her mask

- you make her feel so loved and wanted

- secure, even.

- she's protective but not controlling or overbearing. shes that type of girlfriend that's just a worrywart and relaxes as soon as you're curled up in her arms. you fit there perfectly, too. like you belong there.

- which you do. at least in her mind

- she has such a gentle touch and hold on you. like she's afraid you'll combust in her arms if she holds you too tightly.

- she loves stroking your hair and having you nap

- using her tiddies as a pillow 👌

(angst)

- she needs affirmation from you when it comes to her scars.

- she thinks that jeff ruined her. permanently marking her once spotless body.

- and she thinks you'll hate her or find her disgusting.

- that's why she freezes if/when you gently slip off her mask.

- she stares at you with those teary green eyes. then leans in and kisses you

- you make all of her worries disappear.

- she's also financially comfortable, but not really rich (on that topic: eat the rich)

- she spoils you every chance she gets. gifts, a nice dinner date, you name it

- she almost spoils you as much as she does her cat Emory

- little shit has the sparkliest fucken collar and acts like he's the shit

- he's your fur baby too now

Helen:

- oh my god this disaster of an art boi

- he's convinced he's the luckiest man in the world (and he might as well be!!)

- he obviously wouldn't have been the one to confess. but it was really obvious by how he painted and drew you constantly, that some feeling for you was lodged into his beating heart.

- he treats you like the finest china. with the most care a man can manage.

- he's the definition of clingy and affectionate from the very start.

- he curls around your sleeping form perfectly when y'all cuddle.

- his hand dances in your hair, soothing you into a dreamless sleep each night without fail.

- he has a magic touch and a gentle voice.

- and he cherishes you so fucken much. (like a simp /j)

- he shies away from kisses at first, but will hold your hand and melts if you hold his face in them!!!

- he's greek, and often speaks sweet things to you in it. he's so comfortable around you that he speaks in his native language to you. that's an accomplishment.

- he loves when you baby him. helen loves being cradled and loved.

- taking a nap with his head on your chest also hits different. he's so in love with you

(angst)

- he's afraid of losing you. who wouldn't be? you're amazing and you love /him/ of all people

- he thinks very negatively of himself. please scold him for self deprecating.

- he always worries he'll wake up and you'll be gone.

- so he holds you extra close at night. and follows you around when you leave for any reason. Trails behind you like a lost puppy in need of a gentle kiss.

- which, is what he essentially is

- and also: pls steal his sweater and wear it. he'll cry over how cute you are.

[blockgamepirate]

Hello! Not sure if you’ve had any asks about this but you’re really good at explaining anarchist theory and such. I was wondering what your response is for Jack’s criticism to Niki in his stream? (He visited about 20 min in) Basically it boiled down to “if there is no government or law here, what’s to stop someone from just taking everything?” This is a criticism a lot of people seem to share, that without structure the only people with power are the ones with pvp skill. What’s the solution in that case?

Thanks for the ask! (and thanks for the compliments haha) Okay, first off I wanna link an earlier post I made kind of relating to this subject because otherwise I’d have to get a bit repetitive. But I’m gonna elaborate on this a bit here:

Oh yeah also disclaimer: I’m obviously not an authority (hah!) on anarchism, I’m just one random anarchist. I haven’t even read that much theory tbh, I get bored really easily. Point is, other anarchists might disagree what I have to say, these are just my thoughts and ideas.

1: So to me it kinda seems like Jack is confusing “no rulers“ with “no rules“. He’s thinking of 2b2t when he could be thinking of Hermitcraft (well, Hermitcraft is kinda mixed, sometimes they have a police and a penal system, sometimes they have a mayor, idk, but like... thinking of season 6 for example, which I still keep saying was effectively a mutualist society). Yes, anarchy CAN be “no rules“, but it doesn’t HAVE to be, and as a societal system it usually isn’t. The important part is that if there are rules they must be decided by the consensus of the community. That is, everybody has to agree to them mutually.

2: “No police“ doesn’t mean “no community self-defence allowed“. The difference is that the role doesn’t come with authority; the idea is to intervene to stop an immediate threat, that’s all. The conflict resolution is handled between the people involved and possibly some mediators and with input from the community as a whole if it’s a bigger issue. Honestly, the details aren’t even that important, the point is just that you don’t have a specific group enforcing rules on others

Living alone in her city Niki is definitely vulnerable, there’s no denying that. The best protection would be to have other people there to outnumber possible troublemakers. (Okay I know some people on the server can fight even massively outnumbered, but I mean even someone like Techno tends to think twice before fighting more than three people unless he’s prepared.) If the other people aren’t available, they can go visit the offender afterwards to make it clear that such behaviour is not appreciated and amends must be made.

(I realise that while Niki can’t tell Jack, she actually has some VERY powerful allies now. But yeah, having more people there in general would help to prevent problems in the first place.)

3: This is less about Dream SMP (which actually is probably doomed to be kind of a chaotic mess due to the fact that conflict creates content) and more about the general trope because I can’t help responding to it every time:

The media in general tends to overestimate how prone to violence and destruction people would be without leadership. The example I like to give is natural disasters: in a major natural disaster, law and order tends to break down, often it takes a while for authorities to show up, there’s limited resources, there are immediate threats everywhere.... and usually what happens is that people help each other. Including complete strangers. Usually the first and most important rescue efforts are organised by the people who are right there, being hit by the disaster. The official rescue personnel would otherwise be too late for a LOT of people.

But people’s concept of what a world without laws and authority would look like is more like what happens as a reaction to authoritarian rule. For example the drug wars in Central America are directly linked to the War on Drugs in the USA. Extreme anti-drug policing enables organised crime. The Syrian Civil War was a response to Assad, made even worse by US intervention in Iraq which had already created ISIS which in turn was able to expand to Syria. And we’d be here all day if I tried to list all the wars and breakdowns of society caused by colonialism and its legacy.

4: Governments on the server really don’t have a great track record of stopping the kind of problems Jack brought up from happening. And in fact a lot of the time it’s the governments that do the stealing and griefing themselves. This tends to happen in real life too. Police brutality is a huge problem, because as it turns out, sometimes the asshole who comes and steals your stuff and kills your chicken decides to go into law enforcement first. And then you definitely can’t do anything about it, because who are you gonna call then? The police? (Sidenote: who do you call if the president is stealing your shit and calling it “taxes” lmao (Yes I’m talking about Tubbo in case it wasn’t clear))

Governments also start wars for resources, for territory, for straight up just reinforcing their own power. They usually allow some level of dissent, just to seem reasonable, but if the dissent gets loud and strong enough, they’re very quick to start persecuting activists, even if they have to come up with lies and excuses to do so.

Governments also prop up capitalism, which itself is exploitative and harmful in a systemic way. It might not reward physical power, but it rewards financial power. (I won’t go into it here because it’s a whole other tangent but capitalism pretty much requires some form of government and law enforcement to function, which is why “anarcho-capitalists” aren’t valid. Mutualists are though, mutualists are alright.)

And speaking of systemic power, it creates situations where even otherwise good people end up doing horrible things, because they’re just going along with the existing system. For example, denying disability benefits because someone doesn’t quite fit the requirements, deporting asylum seekers because they weren’t able to prove their lives were in danger, foreclosing on someone’s home because they weren’t able to make their payments...

Or more relevant to the Dream SMP: locking up a visitor in a max security cell for over a week, WITH the prisoner, because it’s what the prison protocol demands (Sam). (Not to even mention everyone who’s been drafted to carry out state violence against their will, like Tubbo, Ranboo and Techno at least, probably more.)

... Okay I’m kinda veering off topic here. But you get the idea. Governments and authority figures regularly fail to protect their people, in fact they’re often the CAUSE of the harm in the first place.

[tortilla-of-courage]

Describing it as being like home is actually pretty accurate yeah.

And YES! I am totally willing to talk about my modern AU.

I've been calling it the Adoption AU because Time ends up adopting all of the boys. It mostly started as, I saw an edit for a tweet someone did with Wars and Wild that involved Taco Bell (cannot remember the blog or post for the life of me though), and so I wrote a thing about Warriors sneaking out of his university dorm to pick up Wild, who snuck out the window despite his broken arm, and then got extorted by Legend in exchange for silence at 3am.

This was followed by a fic where Groose decided spray painting a public building was a good idea and got himself and Sky arrested, set earlier in the timeline.

So then I made a timeline. Twilight is Time and Malon's biological son, and he found Wild on the side of the road one day (Wild's backstory involves a bad car wreck and an underground hospital, but no conspiracy bullshit. Yet). Wild has no memory, so they keep him. Wild brings home Legend, who was told his uncle died at school before a holiday. They then also keep Legend. Malon finds Four in her barn one morning for complicated reasons, and they keep him too. Twilight finds Warriors, who is in his class, hiding in an alley one day after he ran away from an abusive home and brings him home too. SS Impa (who I've nicknamed Shield because there are enough prominent Impas here that they should get nicknames too) is a social worker who's trying to find Sky a home and has run out of options, and turns to Time, who has a record of successfully housing 'unhousable' youths, and asks if he can take one more. He can. Wild finds Hyrule and brings him home because 'Rule needs a shower even more than Wild does. Hyrule stays. Wind's grandma ends up with Wind and his sister but can't financially take care of both and so Wind ends up with the boys and everyone is +1 Grandma.

Twilight has a fic detailing how he knows Midna and Dusk and I ended up shooting him (oops) but at least their social project gets handed in on time.

Then I started hashing out Time's backstory and suddenly this AU had plot. And organized crime. And a conspiracy. And secret societies.

The summarized version is that the gems from OoT are like, Idk what they do yet. Haven't gotten to a point where I need to figure that out yet. But they are Important and have to be carefully guarded. The Great Deku Tree (just called Deku because he's not a tree here) was Time's foster father before Ganondorf killed him. Also, Ganondorf is Deku's half brother. Because. However Time 'stole' the Emerald and he and Navi ran until OoT Impa (Sage) and Lullaby found them. So Time got adopted into Lullaby's family. Ruto inherited the Sapphire from her mother who also died from mysterious circumstances, and Darunia has the Ruby. Lullaby got the Ocarina from her late paternal grandmother.

Then Ganon finds them and tries to steal the Emerald from Time, so Lullaby goes looking for help and thus finds the sages. Saria is an anonymous hacker who uses the screen name 'Kokiri'. Time reveals he didn't steal the Emerald, he was Deku's heir, and then Navi goes missing. Time is home worried enough that he's physically sick, and Ganon decides to try and attack the home. Only Lullaby's family is Olde Money, and they live in a big, old manor, so Lullaby as Sheik decides to play 'Home Alone' with the secret passages in the walls and they piss off Ganon because when did that brat get a sheikah bodyguard??? Sage and Rottla (Lullaby's mother, who is fully sheikah as well) rush home from a thing and Kokiri is running a play by play watching the security cameras.

I pull in my headcanon that Time was killed in the Downfall Timeline by getting impaled on Ganon's tusk and Ganondorf stabs him with the tusk of a mounted boar head and then Sheik shows up to protect his brother, and then Mama gets home and is not happy to find this man in her home attacking her kids. Time is fine, but Navi stays missing. (She's alive tho.)

Also, Time's foster dad was the last leader of a secret society known as The Order of The Lost Woods, and Time learns this upon meeting Tatl, who gets him sucked into another event that would probably make a good action movie. I have thought too much about the Order and it's hierarchy, but what's important here is that Time ends up with a standing job offer and Tatl and he remain friends and we find out how I fit FD into this AU. It's not pretty. This is where Time loses his eye too.

The AoC came out and I added that Link in as Wild's twin brother and he shows up during the main plot.

Which starts with Twi getting kidnapped. (I'm not really meaner to him than the others, I swear, he's just the most logical choice to be Time's heir. Which he is. He doesn't know this though.)

So he's kidnapped by Ganondorf, who broke out of jail, Zant, who shot Twi in highschool, and Ghirahim, who has some history with Sky I haven't fleshed out yet and a very public rivalry with Warriors over twitter. About six weeks later Sage finds him in an abandoned warehouse (because of course) with a shackle on his left arm and a lot of new injuries. He ends up fine, but he tells Time later in the hospital what happened and he's both message and messenger and Time is this close to just committing murder. Tatl talks him down.

Somewhere here is the half finished fic where I introduce AoC Link as Luke/Knight, and this is as far as I've plotted thus far.

Other tidbits: Wild and Lullaby/Sheik are both genderfluid, Lullaby/Sheik married Ruto, Wild has a very popular YouTube channel, Twi does drag racing sometimes, Sky has a pet bird, Four has DID to explain how the Colours are here too, and Wolfie exists in the form of a random wolf-dog Wild found and brought home that Legend somehow convinced half the family was Twilight. Also, Warriors has somehow befriended an entire sorority and he doesn't know how this happened.

This... got long. As you can see I have a lot of thoughts about the Adoption AU. It's gotten a bit away from me, I'll admit. This went from 'Wild does stunts on his motorbike and keeps breaking bones but somehow not the bike' to 'Twilight got kidnapped and Time is the target of a mafia that Ganon runs and also maybe killed a man once' and I don't know how that happened. Also, this is the condensed version of the summary. My actual summary/outline is much, much longer than this. So if there's any detail you want more on, feel free to say so and I'll happily go into more detail (there are so many things I didn't even mention....)

And yes, Robbie having a bong is very important to my best friend, for some reason. He has one in a modern AU and he probably invented one in canon. I happen to agree that this makes sense for his character, if anyone would invent a bong in LoZ it's Robbie (this is such an anticlimactic end to this ask after the stuff about the modern AU...)

Also, sorry for the long ass ask. I genuinely don't know how to condense the Adoption Au down any further. There's a lot of important plot beats to cover, and I still skipped things.

-Attllhak

oh my GOD???? if you ever write and post this somewhere id love to read it, the level of "crazy" conspiracy/action movie elements implemented sound sosososo cool, from Ganondorf being Deku's half brother to trying to "send a message" via Twi and- just- all of this is SO good.i sat here and reread this ask like 3 times as if that would magically spawn more info about it ahaha

there's so much to unpack here but it's honestly so worth it i love every single detail!!! i can imagine the actual outline being way longer, nad honestly that just makes me the more excited/curious about all that might be missing from this ask - i cant believe it started with Wild and Wars going to Taco Bell of all things

also i can totally see Robbie making a bong, no matter the setting or AU. fits him a lot I'd say

and dont worry about long asks!! i adore opening up my askbox to see one ask take over the entire thing, it makes me really happy aha

[fandomflotilla]

Things Beacon Students are No Longer Allowed To Do: Rule 45

45. We understand that you all are emotionally closed off from years of constant warfare against the encroaching darkness threatening to destroy us all. But that doesn’t mean that “All my emotions are classified” is a valid excuse for skipping out on therapy.

45 a. To clarify, yes, Ms Dax has the security clearance to talk to you all about your missions, she’s been thoroughly briefed on you all. The only person with a higher clearance level on campus is the headmaster. You all have no legal reason to skip out on therapy. (The slide shows. Oh god the slide shows. So many pictures. - E. Dax)

45 b. Ms. Dax has officially divested herself from all of her major financial assets and placed them in a blind trust. Beacon’s legal experts have also looked at the case and double checked that no, Ms Dax won’t be at risk for insider trading. She has also signed an NDA stating that she won’t divulge any information gained from students to the press under penalty of jail time. So will you please show up for your therapy sessions now, Ms Schnee?

45 c. Asking for discretion from a mental health advisor is reasonable. Asking for your therapist to be granted diplomatic immunity is a bit more demanding, Ms Belladonna. (Listen, I ain’t snitching unless we all get cool about some stuff real quick. - Blake) (Blake, I’ll be fine. Confidentiality isn’t a joke. I promise not to judge. - E. Dax) (Have you even read my file? I’m not worried about judgement, I’m worried you’re gonna be arrested. - Blake)

45 c i. As of 2 hours ago, Ms. Dax has been granted diplomatic immunity by the Kingdom of Menagerie. Any hangups about the legal troubles Ms Dax would be in from your therapy sessions were already ludicrous, but now Ms Dax has several more layers of legal protection from prosecution. Seriously guys, just talk to her? She’s put in a lot of work here and she’s just trying to help. (How in the HELL did you get diplomatic immunity?!?!? - Blake) (I talked to your parents. - E. Dax) (...shit. - Blake) (They’re lovely people, I told them I was your therapist and they could not sign the paperwork fast enough, they were so excited you were getting professional help. - E. Dax) (...ah. - Blake) (They also mentioned an ex-boyfriend that might be a good place to start talking? - E. Dax) (Oh that explains why they gave you immunity. If we’re starting with that you’re gonna need it... - Blake)