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blkkizzat · 1 year

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ღ 𝐆𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞!𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐨 ღ

𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟏 𝐨𝐟 𝟐

18+ONLY MDNI

kizzatober series: Smooth Criminals

Kinktober Prompts: Clothed Male/Naked Female, Thigh Riding, Knife Play Synopsis: The university campus is being terrorized by a copycat Ghostface killer. As a popular sorority girl with a dumb jock bf, you are a prime choice to be his next victim especially given how he can't stop thinking about you. But you're no ordinary Sorority Girl bimbo, now are you? CW: AU college fic. blood obsession/hematolagnia, bimbo reader, murder, slight DV (from your npc jerk ass bf), unprotected sex, masturbation, slight age gap (roughly 21 vs 28) and dark content. NOTE: If death/killer romanticization related shit triggers you this is probably a fic to avoid because that is happening all through this bitch. I literally wrote a murder fluff smut fic lmfao. WC: 6.5k of 15.4k Lightly black fem coded (reader is an AKA lmfao) but no descriptors.

A/N: This is my first kinktober fic! I'm sorry this took so long y'all but last week been low key hell and I was sick for a lot of it. Also I did struggle with this a bit since this one I decided to do as an whole fic instead of PWP and now its gotten to be so long its definitely going to be in two parts. Sorry there's no smut in the first part, but there is some fluff and some juicy build up. I've never written for Choso before but he's so baby girl omg I'm obsessed with him now but still I'm a bit nervous posting this. sorry if its dog.

Enjoy!

“Ever felt a knife rip through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath?”

Those were the last words a nameless student heard before Ghostface's hunting knife shined menacingly in the air and came down to claim its newest victim.

Shluk! Shluk! Shluk!

Metal slashed through flesh with razor precision.

Gurgled death cries are silenced as the lifeless body collapses to the ground.

A thick pool of blood began gathering around them to fan out and travel around their body down the slanted titled floor to drain.

Choso breathed in deeply.

A wave of calm washed over him.

Peace.

Almost in an enlightened state, he felt the most serene after a kill.

It was beautiful.

Blood was beautiful.

The surging stream of blood that would eventually slow to a trickle, the abstract designs of its splatter and the way it swirled around the body splayed across the ground like paint on a canvas.

Like a painting.

A death painting… and the knife, his paintbrush.

This was his art.

Choso can recall the first time he actually saw blood beyond a minor scrape.

He couldn’t have been more than 6 years old. No doubt trying to impress his younger brother Yuji by balancing on top of the monkey bars. After all this time Choso isn’t certain as to how, but he lost his footing and fell flat on his face onto the unforgiving concrete below.

Screams of children filled the area once Choso pushed himself up onto his feet. He immediately felt wetness rush down his face. However, rather than cry or panic a young Choso cocked his head curiously when he noticed his reflection on the metal jungle gym. A warped view of his face mirrored back at him but he could still make out the bright red fluid cascading down his features staining him in red.

Choso didn’t know how long he stood transfixed, mesmerized by the sight of rouge river that flowed from him until Yuji ran back crying with their parents in tow.

It was how he had the scar across the bridge of his nose till this day, which became unsightly enough he had decided to get a black bar tattooed over it as soon as he turned 18.

From then on he couldn’t deny his growing obsession with blood and seeing it leave the human body. All of which had led him here to this university to attain a PHD in Forensics.

He picked this university, not only for their program but it was the perfect small town playground for Ghostface, a local urban legend from years ago he decided to revive once he felt as he had attained enough knowledge not to get caught.

Choso was meticulous in his process.

Ironclad alibis, no distinctive patterns and no victims with any connections to each other, nor him. Additionally, he had memorized all the angles of the university’s security system (thanks to a security guard he had bribed then promptly killed).

His victims' lives were just his means to an end for his art and most students on this campus wouldn’t amount to much anyway outside of that was how he justified it. Choso did like toying with them on occasion though, fear made the blood pump faster and spray harder once he finally did catch them.

Sadly, he could never admire his creations for too long though before needing to make his own exit.

Almost midnight.

Ten more minutes before campus security makes another round.

He took one last glance at the scene of carnage he had created before disappearing into the night.

☠

In just a mere 2 hours, the news of another Ghostface murder spread across campus.

The university’s students were either scared, scattering back to barricade themselves in their dorms. Or curious, lingering around the crime scene near the safety of the news crews and reporters who had gathered to see who the unlucky victim was this time.

No one however, is likely more curious than you: A third year forensics undergrad, who was just itching to get a real glimpse of your first real crime scene, a Ghostface copycat killer crime scene at that!

You had even left a huge frat party (to be fair it was about to get broken up soon anyway) to trek across campus in the bitter cold of late fall.

“Y/N, let’s go back–,” one of your pledges whined, “–it’s cold and my feet hurt in these heels!”

“Shh, Stassi, shut up! What if this is an initiation test?” another pledge whispered.

Your sorority pledges chatter on behind you and you almost forgot you brought them along. It’s not like you wanted to but, like it or not, they were attached to you at the hip like little ducklings until rush was over.

With a clap you turn on your heel to address them.

“Ladies–”

However you abruptly stop once you see your Forensics TA, Choso Kamo, taking what appeared to be a night jog across the campus quad.

Was he going to the crime scene too? Your face instantly lights up and your pledges look around confused.

“Wait here girlies! I’ll be 5 minutes max…. No, I mean it. Wait right here!”

Your pledges huff quietly, but agree.

They had no choice really as you were already skipping as fast as your not-so-sober legs would carry you in 5-inch pumps over the quad lawn. Truthfully, that was not something they were trying to do too, especially not to chase down what looked like some creepy emo nerd.

“Choso!”

You call out to him and wave, but he doesn’t look like he sees you as you hurry towards him.

“Hey Choooo! Wait up!” You puffed out, trying to maneuver over the grass in your heels.

Choso sighed recognizing your voice, reluctantly slowing his pace. He would have kept on jogging but he knew you would keep calling out to him and draw even more attention that he really didn’t need right now.

Finally catching up to him, you grab Choso’s arm and loop yours through. He flinched slightly at your touch but you knew he always seemed a bit jumpy when it came to physical contact, so this didn’t phase you.

If anything you thought his reactions were kinda cute.

“Where are you going weirdo? All the action is back that way!” You teased with a big grin and pointed in the direction of the crime scene.

Choso tries to ignore how his adrenaline was pumping even faster from you holding on to him than when he was running, especially dressed as you were.

You looked sexy as hell utterly ridiculous.

You were decked out in a sailor costume, which was pretty much just a poor excuse for lingerie at this point. Your white sailor flap collar attached to nothing more than a sparkly navy bra with shiney white and red trims, leaving your midsection exposed showing your cute little belly ring in the shape of an anchor.

This was complemented by a dangerously short yet matching sparkling navy pleated skirt which sat low on your thick hips. Your shapely legs were the most covered part of your body yet still looked overwhelmingly tempting in red glittery garters, attached to white opaque stockings in glittery red heels.

“I’m the weirdo… but you’re dressed like that in 40 degree weather.” Choso retorted, brow raised.

“Duh Choso–”

You released his arm to give him a twirl in your outfit, not noticing the way he nervously wet his lips watching your skirt rise with your little spin.

“–The ‘Get Nauti’ party was tonight silly, where have you been!?”

Oh you know, just casually killing someone. Choso resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

Of course he knew about the party.

The campus had been littered with fliers for ‘Get Nauti’ for the past two weeks. Nothing Choso would ever be interested in as he would rather stab himself in the face than attend a mind-numbing party with a bunch of bro-for-brain frat guys.

However, he did take advantage of the opportunity to create another death painting as Ghostface with the rest of campus preoccupied.

He couldn’t tell you that though obviously.

“Gym,” Choso said flatly and shrugged, “Heading back to the dorms n-”

“–You mean you aren't going to the Social Sciences building!? Don’t you remember?!” You cut him off in your excitement.

“The police said they would let us forensic students look at the next crime scene!”

Your face had a warm glow and your movements slightly swayed. You were clearly drunk.

“No Y/N, they said they might let the PhD students, like me, look at the crime scene… and that was only a slim ‘maybe’. You’re still just an undergrad”, he reminded you, much to your dismay as you puffed your cheeks.

But seriously, Choso thought, even the incompetent local police would have enough sense not to let you on the crime scene dressed as you are now, even if you were a PhD student.

“Awe no fair,” you whine dejectedly. “But you should go, Cho! Then you can tell me all about it! Pleaseeee, I’m dying to know what a Ghostface crime scene looks like. I hear it’s kinda gruesome!”

You gazed up at Choso through fluttering long lashes as you poked out your cherry glossed lips. It was a pout that could famously leave any frat boy at your mercy, but it never seemed to stir Choso much (that you could tell at least).

Choso swallowed.

On the contrary, your charms worked rather well on him. His mouth was dry and he unconsciously clenched and unclenched a sweat ridden palm behind his back.

The hell were you doing being this excited over a crime scene? One of his crime scenes for that matter?

Choso really didn’t know what to make of that.

“Y/N it’s late. I still have papers to grade. I’m going back to my dorm now and you should get home too,” Choso said flatly, trying to keep his cool although fatigue was etched into his voice.

He was in peak physical form but still feeling the strain given he just chased his last victim all over the Social Sciences building. Not to mention still having assignments to grade. All which would be fine if he also wasn’t on edge from you right now as well.

“Booooo…Choso yo– ahchoo!” You sneezed from the cold.

The effects of alcohol could only do so much to keep you warm in these low temperatures while you were standing still.

With another sigh Choso unzipped his black track jacket, taking it off and putting it around your shoulders.

He was doing so as much for your sake as his own. Choso couldn’t help but notice your boobs looking like they were going to pop out of your flimsy sailor bra at any moment when you folded your arms underneath them for warmth.

He was really doing his best to maintain eye contact with you.

“Awe thanks Cho, you’re so chivalrous!” You giggled, blushing as you snuggled into his jacket.

You could still feel his body heat lingering on the material but the heady scent of oak and sandwood from his cologne warmed you even more.

You also couldn’t help but stare as the black compression turtleneck he wore underneath clung to his body like a second skin. You had suspicions he was fit but you never saw him wear anything beyond his dark colored button ups and shaggy sweaters when in class.

“Now go home, Y/N. You shouldn’t even be out here alone this late.”

Choso’s stern voice snapped you out of your ogling.

“But I’m not alone silly!”

You pointed to the group of scared and shivering freshmen girls also in various states of sparkly undress all for the sake of ‘getting nauti’ standing on a paved path not too far off.

They looked absolutely miserable.

“I have my pledges!”

Choso gave you an incredulous look. You were too clueless.

“So let me get this straight… You are drunk. You have drunk freshmen with you, who shouldn’t even be drinking in the first place…and you plan on taking them to a murder scene? Where the cops are?” You made an “OH” face and absentmindedly laughed as you came to the realization it probably wasn’t the best look for Chapter VP of the AKAs to take a bunch of drunk and terrified freshmen pledges straight into a recent crime scene. Even if you could put an academic spin on it as it was relevant to your major classes.

Yikes, and on second thought, your house mom would flip her entire shit if she found out.

“Go home Y/N,” Choso said again, shaking his head.

“Besides, you should be more focused on the Chemistry lab midterm on Monday. You know you can’t afford to fail.”

You sulked but relented, he was right. On both accounts.

As your T.A. for that class Choso knew better than anyone just how much your grade depended on passing that lab and you hadn’t even so much as glanced at your notes yet this week.

“Aye Aye, Capitan Choso, sir!” you teased giving him a salute with a wink and lifted knee, your sailor skirt lifting a bit higher.

It was a cute move, or it would have been at least if it hadn't caused your weight to shift all on to one foot. The heel of the sparkly red glitter pump baring your weight sunk into the patch of soft soil beneath you causing your foot to pop out of the shoe as you tumble forward.

You would have definitely ate shit and embarrassed yourself in front of Choso, your pledges and whoever else was walking across the quad at this time of night if Choso’s quick reflexes didn’t catch you.

You let out a squeak and waved your arms as you fell tits first onto Choso’s hard chest.

Shit.

Choso could feel your hardened nipples pressing against him through the flimsyass costume you wore. He tried hard to focus on how cold it was outside. Anything rather than how warm your body felt up against him or how his biceps tensed from the tight grip of your delicate fingers that sought stability from him.

You grinned sheepishly. You thanked him for catching you not realizing the position you were in nor the torment you were putting this man through.

Setting you upright quickly, Choso crouched down to retrieve your shoe.

His plan was to simply place it near your foot but he felt your hand land on his shoulder and you raised your dainty foot up expectantly.

Any attempts to avert his gaze proved futile as Choso couldn’t stop his eyes from traveling up the length of your leg.

Your opaque white stockings practically glowed in the darkness illuminating the shapely calves it covered and thick thighs the tight material cut into. Your hips strained against your garters up until your –he caught himself and his eyes snapped up immediately.

He was a killer, not a perv at least he was trying not to be.

Gingerly making sure to only touch your ankle, you were giggling again as he put your shoe on your foot and placed it on the grass again.

“Thanks Choso! You really are a lifesaver, ya know! I can’t bend down in this skirt.”

“Don’t mention it.” Choso quickly replied, pushing his bangs out of his face in exasperation.

Really don’t.

Choso was trying to forget the flash of red lace he saw that barely covered your plump pu– No he had to stop, you were technically his student even if he was just a T.A.

He would surely have to kill you if he popped a boner right now. He was trying to keep a low profile already and did not need to add ‘sexual deviant' to his name from a student harassment claim.

“For real now, go home Y/N.” Choso silently pleaded you would just listen this time.

He always felt more compulsive right after a kill and didn’t know what he would do if you stayed around him like this much longer.

You finally relented to his relief, nodding and mumbling a sad little goodnight pulling his jacket around your shoulders tighter as you turned to leave back to your pledges.

Choso started to leave as well but your voice stopped him as you looked at him over your shoulder.

“You know Choso…” You smoothed your skirt down behind you and flashed him a pageant winning smile, “I don’t mind that you saw them.”

Before Choso’s short-circuiting brain could even process what you said you were bouncing off back to your pledges. “Okay ladies, now make like Bey and get in formation! Back to the Soro house!”

Your pledges erupted with various replies from–

‘Thank God!’’

‘Did you just go over there to steal that nerd’s jacket? Boss!’’

‘Was that your boyfriend, Y/N?’

‘Y/N’s bf is a starter on the football team, she doesn’t want that weird emo dork.’

‘No, sis did you see his muscles– That emo look is still kinda hot right now, huh Y/N?’

‘Awe, but I want to go back to the frat!’

–all fluttered from the group of chattering girls as you cheerily led them back to the Sorority house.

You laughed at their comments hoping Choso couldn’t hear them though, as they were a bit embarrassing.

Unfortunately for the both of you, there was no way for Choso not to hear your rowdy group of drunk giggling girls, he’s sure the whole quad did.

Choso rolled his eyes as a chill took over him as he started the jog back to his dorms.

He was glad he had given you his jacket though. The way his body had started to respond to you just now the frigid jog back to the dorms would do him good.

He just wanted to shower, grade a few papers then go to bed, he didn’t want to end up fisting his cock to you again tonight.

You had plagued his peace for too long. It wouldn’t do him any good to think of you, it’s not like he could ever have you.

Sure you went to the same university but you might as well have been from two different worlds.

You were a popular sorority undergrad with the attention of virtually the entire male population on campus.

Choso was a PhD student who was used to fading in the background, most avoided him due his looks and academic focus anyway.

He only had an affiliation with you because his scholarships were tied to being a T.A. for undergrad forensics classes.

Also you did have a boyfriend.

An asshole neanderthal football-wide-receiver boyfriend who he would have been tempted to kill already had he not served his own purpose as a reality check and barrier for Choso.

Oh and had an eccentric obsession with blood going for him and was also the Ghostface copycat killer, that too.

He was sure that would go over well with you, Choso mused sarcastically.

☠

Upon returning to his dorm Choso took a shower, graded papers and tried to fall asleep but inevitably jerked his cock off to you.

Twice.

The sounds and images of your ditzy little laugh and skippy little panties consumed him as soon as he closed his eyes. The phantom feeling of the way your nipples felt pressed against his chest and how you clung to him desperately had him feeling near insatiable.

Choso admittedly thinks of killing you often. Just to get some peace of mind.

It wouldn’t be difficult at all to pull off. It’s not like you could put up much of a fight against him.

He didn’t want to break his rule of killing anyone with a connection to him but Choso had also never had anyone stir him the way you did.

You were a distraction and liability to him. If he killed you he could finally stop thinking about you…right?

You would make a beautiful death painting too.

Choso imagines thick red blood splattered across your curves.

The fatal gash from the femoral artery in your thigh oozing out a continuous stream of blood. The cut would have to be considerably deep too considering how meaty your thighs were.

Would the blood streak down your long leg as you desperately tried to hobble away from him in your slutty red heels?

Or would you collapse in fear and surrender to him fully? Landing in such a way that allowed the blood to redirect backwards and soil the flimsy red panties poorly concealing the fat of your cunt as you cried out in fear.

Fuck.

He was hard again.

He reached over to his night stand for his lotion bottle– practically empty thanks to his nonstop fantasies of you.

God, he was pathetic.

☠

The school week that followed was relatively uneventful.

You passed your lab midterms much to Choso’s surprise. Although you always seemed to pass with a relatively decent grade despite how you struggled to get there. Holding firm to your B average in the class and 3.3 GPA in your major overall.

He had to admit you were a better student than he originally gave you credit for. It makes him recall when he first saw you last spring.

You were a late enroll to Forensic Biology 101. Not only that, you burst into the third class of the semester nearly 15 minutes late.

Oblivious to all the eyes your disruption earned, you leaned on your knees as your chest heaved from exertion giving the entire class an amazing view of your tits spilling from your pink crop top adorned with the prestigious “AKA” sorority.

You definitely would have given the class an additional show from bending over in your tight green jean skirt had your ass not been facing the door. Choso eyes couldn't help but travel down the length of your legs, your glossy white painted toes peeking out strappy pink pumps.

You smiled brightly once you caught your breath and apologized for your late entrance but you were newly voted chapter vice president and had just come from your first meeting.

Surely you had the wrong classroom.

“Er– this class is Forensic Biology 101 young lady.” The older male professor had given you a once over also thinking you must be lost.

“Mhm, yup! I’m Y/N! I just changed my major!” you beamed and handed the professor your schedule.

He looked at it and back at you twice.

“Hm, well so it is…but you are already behind, little lady. Go and take a seat next to the T.A. in the back, Choso Kamo, he will catch you up.”

Just his luck. Choso didn’t want to babysit some sorority bimbo who would probably drop this class in two weeks once the labs started.

Your university was famous for the forensics program. If you graduated you were all but guaranteed a job at a prominent lab in a major city but more than two thirds of undergrad students dropped it once the rigorous labs began.

You didn’t look like you would last.

Especially when you told him your interest in forensics came from watching Dexter. You told him how you thought the actor was hott and how his kill rooms were ‘so cool.’ Choso definitely rolled his eyes at that and wrote you off as a soon-to-be drop out.

You proved him wrong though.

You were a bit of a ditz and a huge clutz but Choso came to understand t's more because you had about a billion different things going on in your head at once rather than you just being dumb or careless.

You were also a hard worker.

It was admirable how many activities you were involved in yet still tried as hard as you did in your classes. You always came to his T.A. review sessions and even sought him out at times while he was in the research library to ask him questions.

You were a good student and he was a horrible T.A. for even thinking of you in this way.

The campus bell tower struck noon in the distance and Choso looked down to see that he had only read a single paragraph since he sat down to study thirty minutes ago.

Fuck, he had lost himself in thinking about you again.

Choso put a hand over his face.

He was sitting alone at a picnic table on the outer, less populated edges of the quad trying to read a textbook but every time he heard a high pitched giggle he snapped his head up thinking it was you.

Class schedules were a bit different due to midterms and he hadn’t seen you the entire week other than to administer the lab but that didn’t mean you didn’t still plague his thoughts more increasingly as of late.

It was making Choso a bit reckless.

Needing to relieve stress he had created 2 more death paintings. A mistake as it was rumored the local police would soon reach out to bigger towns for more help and perhaps even the FBI would send an agent soon to campus if this kept up.

He had to move more carefully.

Maybe make it look like there were multiple Ghostface killers for starters.

“3 Victims, One Week: The Copycat Ghostface Reign of Terror Continues!”

You read aloud adding a bit of dramatic flair to your voice as you recite the front headline of the campus paper and jar Choso from his thoughts of you.

Speak of the devil.

You approached Choso at his table and he immediately noticed you were wearing his jacket again, well more like swimming in it as it was clearly too big for you.

This time though you were bundled up in a scarf, leggings and heeled booties. He was glad his face was already a bit red from sitting out in the cold because he couldn’t stop the intrusive thoughts from forming that you looked even sexier cozied up and comfortable in his jacket than in the slutty sailor costume.

“I don’t know why you even bother reading that shit Y/N. They never have any interesting details anyway.” Choso tried to feign disinterest in your arrival but his leg was already slightly bouncing under the table, nervous energy returning.

“Well I have to! You wouldn’t go to the crime scene for me last Saturday, remember?”

How could he forget?

However a part of him did want you to view it though, his masterpieces, his kills.

See how glorious their blood looked sprayed on the walls, the ground, and the general surroundings of his victims.

But he knew you’d never appreciate them the way he did even if you were a forensics student.

“Oh and sorry!”

You interrupted his thoughts once again.

“I meant to give you back your jacket, I’ve been carrying it with me hoping I’d run into you but I ran out today and forgot mine…whoops! I hope you don’t mind me wearing yours a bit longer?”

Your saccharine smile has Choso sucking in a hard breath.

At this point he would prefer you to just keep it, he couldn’t trust himself if he had it back with your scent all over it knowing you had been carrying it around all week.

He would never know any peace.

“Keep it as long as you need.”

“Kay!”

You smile at him as you haphazardly plop your overstuffed tote bag down next to him, which of course spilled all its colorful contents all over the table.

“Oh Crap!”

You lean over to reach for your bag but almost spill the tray of hot coffees in your hand.

“Y/N, Watch out!”

Choso grabbed the tray before it could spill all over his and your belongings and sat it down on the table with a small exhale.

“Oh! Thank you!” You flash him a big grin. “I got this one for you!”

You handed him a grande cup with ‘pumpkin spice dirty chai’ scribbled on it.

Choso preferred his coffee black and he has definitely told you that before but you always just brought him whatever sugary drink you ordered saying he needed to ‘try new things’.

He wasn’t about to turn you down though, caffeine was caffeine and as a PhD student he needed all he could get. Choso also knew it was your way of thanking him for helping you so much in forensics.

“Thanks...” Choso mumbled taking a sip. Shit this is actually good.

You sat down next to him, a little too close for comfort with your spandex clad thigh brushing up against his leg.

“Whatcha reading? Is it for your thesis?” You were perilously close leaning on him as you looked over his broad shoulder onto his textbook.

“Yeah, some forensics texts I need to review for citations. This section focuses on serology and bloodstain pattern analysis,” Choso stated knowledgably.

“Oh! Like in Dexter!”

“Yeah, Y/N, like in Dexter.”

Maybe Choso is growing a bit soft as he can’t resist but to crack a small smile at your kid-like-enthusiasm for the subject, you were incorrigible.

Choso also doesn’t miss the way your eyes sparkle when you ask him to tell you more about his research.

And so he does.

Sometimes Choso forgets how easy you are to talk on the subject. To be frank no one outside his own PHD program ever asks him about his thesis so before he realizes it he’s letting his guard down to indulge you.

You both get so lost in the conversation to the point it hasn’t even phased Choso yet that you are now actually leaning on him.

Your soft cheek rests near his shoulder and your body angles deeper into his as you point to ask him about a passage on the page which he begins to break down.

You try to focus on his words but in the midst of Choso’s explanation your eyes stray from the text up to his face.

You feel your body start to warm.You always thought he was attractive. His dark looks never deterred you if anything they were refreshing from the crew cut preppy jocks around you. Even more so with his piercings in.

Choso never wore any of his piercings during classes or while in the research library. You counted six facial piercings in total from the three on his brows to the septum, labret and finally the black bar piercing through his tongue that darted out exposed with the movements of his mouth.

Studying him further you discover for the first time his tattoo across the bridge of his nose was actually covering a scar. It looked old but like it had been deep.

You couldn’t help but wonder if it had hurt him and why he chose to cover it.

You didn’t even realize you had reached out to touch it until you felt his gaze snap to you.

Stunned and a bit embarrassed, you withdraw your hand.

“Ah, sorry I just noticed your tattoo was covering a scar…” you trailed off hoping he wouldn’t be annoyed with you.

Annoyance was the last thing on Choso’s mind as finally registered how you had melded yourself into his side body.

Although his usual reaction would be to withdraw back, you might as well have him chained down to the table now as he was practically immobilized by you not even being able to look away.

“Uh, yeah it happened years ago when I was a kid...I fell off the monkey bars, there was a lot of blood.”

No one had even recognized it since Choso had it covered years ago. You were the first.

“Oh no! I loved the monkey bars, we used to climb up on them all the time when I was little. I guess those things are kinda dangerous huh? Actually, I’m kinda shocked I never fell, a miracle right?”

You laughed and Choso found himself smiling at you again.

You were too accident prone so it really was a miracle.

“Yeah, good thing you never fell Y/N… It would be a shame to have to get a big ugly tattoo on that cute face.”

Choso swore on his life those last words only were said in his head but from the way your eyes widened he knew he fucked up.

“I- that is.. I meant-”

Choso smacked a hand over his face. He can’t believe he just said that out loud to you. He was really losing it.

“So you think I’m cute?” you teased giggling. You angled your head so you could look up at him from underneath his hand.

“Yeah, about as cute as the blood splatter diagram on this page.” he teased you back. A small smirk on his features as he peeked at you through his fingers.

“Hey!”

Choso chuckled. Little did you know he actually paid you a huge compliment comparing you to something he thought so alluring as blood.

You grab the hand covering his face as your smile widens and you playfully struggle with Choso.

You don’t become aware of your close proximity until you almost bump noses.

Choso locks eyes with you and you feel your tummy tighten as you bite your lip.

You’re still holding his hand and after a while you work up the courage as your other hand comes up to touch his face.

“Your tattoo isn’t ugly Choso,” you breathe out softly.

Choso closes his eyes as you trace the scar beneath his tattoo.

You weren’t sure what you were doing but your hand involuntarily begins to travel across his face and his piercings until they graze over his lips and he opens his eyes again.

Startled by the sudden hungry look in his eyes you pull back your hand but he captures it in his own, him being the one to trap you this time.

If either one of you just moved even an inch forward your lips would touch. You see Choso’s lips part when–

“Yo! Hands off my girl, freakshow!”

“Dean!?” You pulled back out of Choso’s embrace, floored to see your boyfriend and some more of his football buddies heading towards you as you knew they still should have been at practice around this time.

“Oooh he’s in for it now messin’ with Dean’s girl.” Dean’s football friends snickered.

Choso audibly breathes out in exasperation. The moment was ruined and he really didn’t have the patience to deal with your neanderthal boyfriend and his football lackeys who all shared a singular brain cell.

Didn’t they have a ball or something to chase?

“Uh hey, Dean I..”

You stop yourself when it’s clear Dean is ignoring you entirely as he approaches the table. Not even looking your way to greet you.

His aura oozes faux tough guy bully and walks straight up to Choso to size him up leaning on the table to tower over him.

“I’m talking to you, freak. You think you can put your hands on what belongs to me?”

Choso doesn’t look up at him but his grip instinctively tightens on the pen in his hand under the table as if it was Ghostface’s hunting knife.

Dean’s show of bravado going ignored by Choso pisses him off even more that his teammates are with him and the tough guy act is failing to have any real effect.

Tch.

With a swift movement Dean knocks Choso’s coffee over on the table, its half drunken contents falling on both you, Choso and his books.

This has Choso rising out of his seat as he thinks your boyfriend must have an unknown death wish.

Choso’s pen is still in his grasp but by his side now. It would be too easy to drive it into Dean’s neck before the dolt even knew what hit him. A bit extreme, but it could be considered an unfortunate accident of self defense if Dean struck first.

Fortunately, you stepped in between the two in order to diffuse the situation without picking up on Choso’s murderous intent.

You chewed your lip. This was low key, your fault. You technically were dating Dean. Although Dean was always the furthest thing from your mind when you were around Choso.

You didn’t even feel guilty for being caught as you’ve had your own suspicions for a while Dean had been cheating on you anyway, you just couldn’t prove it. You were still dating him more out of convenience than anything else, other jocks and frat boys left you alone knowing you were with him.

The only guilt you actually did feel was for Choso. This wasn’t his problem or relationship but of course Dean was a big enough asshole to make this into an actual issue with Choso since it was becoming clearer how little respect he had for you.

“Dean, what the hell is your problem!? You got coffee everywhere, this isn’t even my jacket.”

“Don’t what the hell me Y/N, you're so fucking dumb you’re going to let this freak get in your pants when– wait you’re wearing fucking his jacket!?”

Dean was yelling now and a small crowd was forming and starting to take out their phones to record.

You could not let this turn into an incident.

“Dean chill the entire fuck out, would you?! It was cold, so he let me borrow it– He’s just my T.A.”

A wave of harsh realization washed over Choso.

Just her T.A.

Right.

Choso is no one important to you, especially with your football boyfriend and social standing on the line.

He’d let whatever the fuck almost happened between the two you just now make him forget that.

Not anymore.

“That’s right. I’m just her T.A. So if you’ll excuse me.”

Choso turned from you both to salvage what he could of his books and leave.

You couldn’t place the emotions in Choso’s words and it made your chest tighten up. But you weren’t trying to write him or your almost-kiss off.

You didn’t mean for it to come out that way but you really lacked the proper words in these kinds of situations.

“Where do you think you’re going, loser?”

Dean grabbed Choso’s shoulder but the intense murderous look in his eyes made Dean release him just as quickly as if he had been burned.

Even his football goon friends unconsciously took a few steps back feeling the very real threat in Choso’s eyes.

Choso smirked as he left. Thought so.

“W-wait Cho–”

You want to stop him but feel Dean’s rough grip on your wrists.

“Whatever, let’s fucking go Y/N. We have an important party to throw later.”

Dean grabs your wrist and jerks you away with you barely being able to grab your bag.

Your stomach twists and you are at a complete loss for words but manage to flash an apologetic look at Choso while you are dragged off.

However when your eyes meet he looks right through you.

The expression on his face is stone cold and it sends a chill up your spine.

© ʙʟᴋᴋɪᴢᴢᴀᴛ 2023. ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛꜱ ʀᴇꜱᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ. ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ꜱᴛᴇᴀʟ, ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛᴇ, ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴏʀ ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ. ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇꜱ ꜰɪᴄꜱ, ᴅʀᴀʙʙʟᴇꜱ, & ɢʀᴀᴘʜɪᴄꜱ. ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ʙʏ ᴍᴇ ᴜɴʟᴇꜱꜱ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀᴡɪꜱᴇ ꜱᴛᴀᴛᴇᴅ. ᴛʜᴀɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ

A/N: I promise it won't take as long for the second part to come out. I'm half way done with it already! I was just going to wait and post it all together but a like 12k+ word post all at once would be insane lmfao. After I am finished with this prompt the next 3 stories I will do will be from Thrilling Ghouls as they are all much shorter PWPs in the 3-5k range and I won't have to stress so much since I'm realizing all my Smooth Criminal prompts are longer fics and it takes me like a week or more to write them.

ღTaglistღ: @callm3senpaii @arxliana @jujutsualy @luxiethefairy @akaza-simp01 @fredswh0re @missphanosaur18 @moon-esque @samicamy-13

comment on m.list to be tagged in future Kinktober '23 stories

please stop to take a look at this wonderful art of the last scene that @laikatsuki created, tysm again pookie bears!!!

Reblog for Ghostface!Choso to come steal your panties although comments and likes are appreciated all the same!

PART 2

2K notes · View notes

buckymorelikefuckme · 2 months

Text

what a wicked thing to do

vampire wanda maximoff x fem reader

words: 4.2k

warnings & tags: **18+ ONLY** lesbian vampires yes GAWD, fantasy au, inaccurate historical au, smut, fingering, implied soulmates (?? kinda i guess), biting 👀, mention of blood, does this count as hurt/comfort? we shall see!! and uhhh it's kinda spooky ooky vibes but it's not really dark? i think. pls let me know if i missed anything!

a/n: listen..... i've already got spooky season in the brain and i really wanted to reshare this fic. i've edited it a little but i've also left the link to where i orphaned it on ao3 in the title if you prefer reading there~ any and all mistakes are my own! feedback is greatly appreciated and heavily encouraged pls and thank ♡ xoxo

wanda maximoff masterlist || main masterlist

It’s that time of year in between autumn and winter where it’s only getting colder and colder, no reprieve even during the sun’s highest point of the day. Part of you worries it’s a mistake to wander through the woods like this, especially so close to sunset.

But then you remember the briefest moment when you saw her, when your eyes met hers; it happened so quickly, but also felt as if time stopped. Something flashed in her gaze before she looked away and disappeared in the busy crowds of the village.

That moment, as brief as it was, leads you here. You hug your arms tighter to your torso, cursing the bitter wind whipping around you. Your dress had been a bright idea when you’d first thought of it. Now, you’re wondering why you thought such a plunging neckline would be smart, considering the seasonable chill in the air.

Although, you think with a flutter in your stomach, that’s not exactly true. You know exactly why you chose this dress.

There’s hardly any light left in the sky by now. You’re kicking yourself for getting lost in the woods, wondering if anyone would notice, or care, whether or not you return to the village. You have no family, no money, nothing tying you to anyone or anything. You work odd jobs to be able to make ends meet. The people knew of you, but you are sure they hardly concerned themselves with your well-being.

But then, when your gaze had met her own, you’d felt seen for the first time in ages. It was like she could see everything inside your mind, every ounce of longing and every bit of loneliness, even in the split second she held your stare. You haven’t been able to stop thinking about her since then. Nearly two weeks have passed, and you’d finally decided to find out if the stories that follow her hold any truth. They are quite colorful, full of fantasy and myth, surely decorated to sound more elaborate as the years go on. Fantasy and myth, perhaps, but one particular piece of information continues to remain the same.

She hasn’t seemed to age in the fifteen years she’s spent living near your village. Not one line or wrinkle to be seen on her pale skin. Not one gray hair on her head. Some of the elders even swear they'd seen her when they were children.

Her home is a mystery, one that stays that way out of fear. There is something about her eyes, some say, something off, not quite right. Because of this, no one has felt compelled enough to try finding her home.

At least, not until you.

You’re beginning to think you are truly lost, feeling hopeless, when you finally spot something in the distance. But just as relief washes through you, the rain starts. Each drop feels like sharp, stabbing pieces of ice landing on your exposed flesh, soaking into the thin fabric of your dress. It takes mere minutes for you to become drenched. Your dress is now clinging to your body uncomfortably, the cold even more biting than it already had been.

It comes into view, what you’d spotted several meters back, easier to make out. A looming castle breaks through the trees, windows lit with candles.

Your arms and feet are going numb, but you push through, stumbling your way to a cobblestone path that leads to tall, wooden doors. With a trembling hand, you raise the door knocker and bang it against the door as loud as you can manage, praying whoever is inside will hear.

Your wait is short lived, thankfully. The door creaks open loudly to reveal the very woman you’d been searching for. If she’s shocked to see you, she hides it well. She looks as regal as ever. A black dress hugs her lithe body, her hair perfectly brushed and styled. This close to her, you can see what the people mean. She looks ageless.

“E-excuse me, madam,” you begin, trying your best to keep your teeth from chattering. “I-I’m terribly lost and I d-don’t think I can find my w-way back to the village.”

The woman lets her eyes roam your shivering frame, lingering on your glistening chest for a second, then meets your pleading gaze.

“Of course. Please, do come in. I’m sure you’re cold.”

“Th-thank you,” you reply earnestly.

She steps aside, leaving just enough space for you to squeeze by.

“Think nothing of it,” she assures you. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you need, at least until the storm passes.”

As the door closes behind her, you take in as much of the space as possible. With it being nighttime, the candles can only do so much. For a castle, it is rather large, but it’s not quite as foreboding as you would have imagined. Though, you surmise, you hadn’t really known what to expect at all.

“Would you like something dry to change into?”

You whirl around, almost tripping over your feet as her voice registers, so close to your ear.

She smiles, amusement tickling the corners of her mouth. “Perhaps a cup of tea?”

Swallowing roughly, you nod, offering a smile of thanks in return.

“Very good. You should go sit by the fire to warm up while I get everything sorted.”

She points toward a room where you can see flickering light dancing off the walls. You nod again, letting your tired feet follow the promise of warmth. The closer you get to the large fireplace, the harder you shiver, goosebumps rising along your skin. You stand as close as you deem safe, hands held out to thaw them. For the second time, she sneaks up behind you.

“This is all I could manage to find.”

You gasp as you turn to face her. She’s still smiling as she holds up the proffered item of dry clothing.

“You frightened me,” you state dumbly, huffing a quiet laugh.

“I did not mean to,” she replies.

“It’s okay.” You glance at the clothes in her hand, a frown forming on your face. “A… dressing gown?”

She makes a sympathetic face. “It was all I could find,” she repeats.

Her eyes dip down to your chest again. They flash, just like in the village, but you’re sure it could have just been the fire reflecting in them. You look down to see what she’s staring at and heat rushes up your neck. Your nipples are clearly outlined against the wet fabric of your dress.

“Oh,” you murmur as you lift your arms to cover yourself.

She clears her throat delicately. “Take this. You’ll get sick if you keep your wet clothes on.” She pointedly holds the dressing gown out to you again until you gingerly take it. “I’ll go get the kettle started while you change.”

“Thank you,” you return quietly.

When you’re sure she’s gone, you undress as quickly as you can, more shivers wracking your frame as you stand naked in her drawing room for a few seconds before pulling on the silk dressing gown, tying it securely around your waist.

While you wait you decide to get a better look of the room. A few paintings hang on the dark walls, but mostly they’re covered with floor to ceiling shelves and stuffed to the brim with books. You take notice of a few spots where the dust hasn’t seemed to settle in front of them, figuring those must be her favorites. A plush chaise sits in the center of the room with two chairs on either side, atop an ornate rug that rests on most of the floor. There are a couple small tables between the chaise and chairs with candelabras on them, and a wide, lower table in front of them. You spot a desk by the only window in the room.

There’s nothing particularly personal about the space. It almost feels as if she’s newly moved in. But you know that can’t be true, especially since so many people in the village have seen her visit town for years now.

A piece of parchment on the desk catches your eye. You debate over whether or not you should let your curiosity get the better of you, your feet slowly carrying you over to where the paper lay. There’s writing on the top piece, and you get as far as the addressed “Brother,” but then hear her round the corner and quickly back away.

“I wasn’t sure if you took cream and sugar, so I brought them just in case,” she tells you, setting a silver tray on the low-lying table that held the teapot and teacups.

You walk over as she pours the tea into both cups. You pick one up and carefully drop two lumps of sugar into yours, stirring it with your teaspoon until you’re satisfied it’s melted. A careful sip as you sit down and you hum happily.

“Better?” she asks, smiling and taking a sip of her own tea, sitting beside you.

It occurs to you suddenly that you hadn’t asked for introductions. You scold yourself internally, knowing you had better etiquette than that.

“I must apologize, I seem to have forgotten my manners. I never introduced myself,” you say, then offer your name. “And what is yours, madam?”

“You may call me Wanda,” she replies.

“Well, I owe you a great deal for helping me, Wanda. I cannot thank you enough.”

She waves a dismissive hand. “Please, there is no need. I’m glad I was here and that you aren’t in danger of freezing to death.”

“As am I,” you respond, laughing lightly.

Silence settles between you. Your mind whirls with hundreds of questions, but you don’t know where to begin. Your plan to find her only consisted of just that— finding her. Now that you’re here, you aren’t quite sure what to do. Or say, for that matter.

You can feel her eyes observing you like a caress. You struggle not to squirm or shiver, though you are no longer cold. No, there is no chill clinging to your bones anymore. Her stare alone provides enough heat. You chance a glimpse of her from the corner of your eye, but she catches it. She purses her lips to keep from smiling in amusement.

“So,” you blurt, cheeks pinking, “have you lived here long?”

You bite the inside of your cheek as soon as the words leave your mouth. Stupid, stupid girl.

Thankfully, Wanda laughs.

“Quite,” she says teasingly, like she’s letting you in on a joke.

You nod. “I see. Is it a family home?”

She tilts her head consideringly. “Of a sort.”

What is that supposed to mean? Miraculously, you don’t ask that question aloud.

“Do you… Do you live alone?”

You’re not sure why you ask. Perhaps it’s that you haven’t heard any other movement throughout the castle that indicated a waiting staff of some sort. Afterall, she was the one to fetch the tea.

“I do,” she says.

You don’t want to examine it too closely, but you’re positive you note a hint of longing in her tone.

“S’a lot of space for one person,” you muse in acknowledgment.

She nods. “Indeed. However, I’m sure I’ll find the right companion soon.”

You take another sip of your tea to avoid replying, but are not able to avoid meeting her gaze. The look in her eyes is something you’ve never seen directed at you. You’re hesitant to think it could be want, open desire. Not from a woman like her.

—

Wanda still cannot believe that you’d shown up at her door.

She’s spent months watching you from a distance, never allowing herself to be seen by you—not until she felt it was time. From the very first moment she caught sight of you, she knew. You are hers. Her mouth watered when the wind brought your scent to her. There was not a doubt in her mind about whether she would have you; she simply would.

She had waited, ever so patiently, watching you as you roamed the streets of the village. You didn’t seem to have very many acquaintances, if any at all, and you were always alone. Wanda quickly figured out that you were without a family as well.

Selfishly, she’d been happy about these facts.

Finally, Wanda allowed herself to meet your gaze. It was quick, but she knew her eyes flashed, knew that she piqued your curiosity. It would only be a matter of time.

After nearly two weeks had gone by, however, she had started to think it hadn’t worked. She’d planned on returning to town to purposefully cross your path again, but as luck would have it, you came to her. As soon as she heard the knock on her door, she smiled.

Now, as she sits next to you on the chaise, your skin glowing in the firelight, she finds it harder to maintain her control. This close, your scent is even more intoxicating. Wanda can tell that you’re curious about her. The questions you want to ask are swirling behind your eyes. And now that you’re here, she decides she’ll answer whatever you ask, give you anything you want.

You’ve gone quiet, though, so she does some prodding of her own.

“What were you doing out in the woods?” Dressed like that, blessedly, goes unsaid.

You shyly glance down at your lap. “I, uh, I like to take walks,” you mutter into your teacup as you go to take another sip.

Wanda hums. A plausible excuse, indeed. You carefully lean forward to set your cup and saucer on the table and when you sit back you move your hair over to one shoulder. Wanda’s eyes zero in on the pulsepoint of your neck. If she focuses hard enough, she can see your heartbeat throbbing beneath your skin. It makes her teeth itch, makes her control waver even more.

When she drags her gaze away from your neck, she finds you already observing her. Her desire is clearly reflected in your eyes and the feeling is heady.

—

“Are you warm now?” she wonders.

“Yes,” you whisper, your breathing picking up, making your breasts heave alluringly.

You’d go as far as saying you are overheating. The dressing gown, where you’d been unsure and embarrassed of being nude underneath it before, is now a blessing. Your body feels alight with an unseen, growing fire. Shifting on the chaise, you don’t notice the sleeve slip down your shoulder, only registering the air skimming across your collarbones. You let out a surprised gasp when you feel something cold on your bare arm.

Peering down reveals it to be Wanda’s hand carefully sliding the sleeve back up into place. Your brows pull together in a frown.

“Your hand…” you mumble, trailing off.

She lets it linger on your shoulder for a moment, then slowly traces down your arm, her thumb grazing the side of your breast. Your nipples tighten, thighs clenching together as you watch her fingers stop at your wrist. Though her touch is cold, it feels like a relief against the searing heat of your flesh. You peek at her through your lashes and find her expression to be one of complete hunger.

Feeling emboldened, you hold her stare as you shift to pull the sleeve down again.

Her lips lift on one side, her teeth glinting dangerously. “Are you sure of what you’re doing?” she asks.

You blink, faux innocence shifting behind your eyes. “I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

Wanda takes a deep, steadying breath, though it only helps in inhaling your scent more. She says your name. “Why do you think you are here?” The question catches you off guard. Wanda shifts even closer to you, watching your throat bob as you swallow. “We both know it isn’t because you accidentally got lost in the woods. You were out there with a purpose. What was it?”

You lick your lips, noticing her gaze immediately drop to them. It makes your heart pound in your chest.

“I don’t know,” you reply, unsure.

She leans in, her nose nearly touching yours. “You do,” she whispers, without doubt. “Why are you here?”

Your eyes flutter closed, head tilting back without you being aware of it, exposing your neck. You feel her presence mere centimeters away from you, her breath puffing out along the column of your throat.

“I… I felt drawn here. It feels like I was meant to be here,” you say, quiet, almost hoping she doesn’t hear you.

It feels ridiculous to say it out loud. It’s one thing to have that thought sit in the back of your mind where you could pretend it didn’t exist, but to admit it aloud is entirely different.

“With me?”

You shiver at her words, her lips having softly dragged across your skin. Helplessly, you nod.

“Are you afraid?”

That makes you frown, but you adamantly reply, “No.”

“Open your eyes,” she pleads.

You follow her instruction, wary, but gasp at what you see. Sharp fangs peek out from Wanda’s lips, her eyes so pale they’re almost white now. Though your heart continues to race, it’s not out of fear. It should scare you, it should send you running, but you find your hand slowly rising to carefully trace a finger down one of her fangs, amazed that she even lets you.

“You’re…” You start, meeting her patient gaze once more. “Beautiful,” you finish in a whisper, because she is. You go to reach for her face to stroke her cheek, but she lurches backward. In a blink, Wanda’s on the other side of the chaise. Disbelief paints her features.

“You think I’m… beautiful?”

“Of course,” you state plainly, brows furrowing. Wanda continues staring at you in wonder. “You said I was here for a reason.” Ironically, she’s now wary of you as you shuffle closer to her. “I know what that reason is now.”

“Which is?” she asks apprehensively.

“You,” you murmur, cupping her cheek. “I’m here for you.”

Wanda looks as if she’s scared to accept this, to hope for it to be real. You steal away those worries by leaning in to place a soft kiss to her lips. She inhales sharply, eyes squeezing shut, her cold hands gripping your wrist almost painfully. You give her a moment, kissing her forehead as she gathers her emotions, keeping her gaze down.

“Are you sure?”

Her voice cracks softly, but her grip on your wrist loosens as you move it. You lift her chin so she’s looking at you.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

She stares at your lips for a few seconds, and then, as your words sink in, they seem to send her into action. She surges forward and captures your lips, more sure, more eager than before. You respond in kind, pulling her as close as possible, sighing into her mouth.

You quickly find yourself on your back on the chaise, Wanda above you, bodies slotting perfectly into each other like lost puzzle pieces. You feel her hand slide down from where it was in your hair to graze along your sternum. Then her hand cups your breast, thumb swiping across your nipple, and you gasp. It’s the perfect opportunity to deepen the kiss and Wanda takes it.

Her tongue slides against yours and you whine, clutching at her like she’s the only thing tethering you to this earth. It becomes so easy to let her settle between your thighs, to arch into her touch and slide your tongue in her mouth, delicately tracing over her fangs. Wanda shudders, grunting inelegantly before wrenching herself away, panting heavily into the space between you. You blindly chase after her, opening your eyes in confusion.

Wanda’s gaze is intent on your neck, full of desire. The weight of the moment hits you, then. What exactly it would mean if you give in to her. So, with full faith in your decision, you tilt your head ever so slightly and she goes perfectly still.

“Go ahead,” you encourage.

She shakes her head. “You don’t know what you’re asking.”

You huff. “I do. I want you to do this.” You know she won’t look at you just yet, so you lace both your and her fingers together and squeeze hers as you continue. “I need you to do this.”

“If I do,” she starts, swallowing thickly, “I won’t be able to stop. You’ll end up like me.”

You duck your head to catch her stare. “And what’s wrong with that?”

She closes her eyes and falls silent for a moment. The weight of your words fall over the two of you like a winter blanket.

“I’ve waited so long,” she confesses, voice quiet, shaking and timid.

“For me?” you ask. She nods. “I’ve been looking for something, or someone, to make me feel whole all my life.” You use your free hand to stroke her cheek. Even with her eyes closed, she leans into you. “I’ve waited for you, too.”

When she finally looks at you, you know there’s no going back for either of you.

“It’s going to hurt,” she warns.

“That’s okay. It will only be temporary.”

She smiles then, slow and teasing. “I can ease the pain, you know.”

Her free hand tugs lightly on the ties holding your dressing gown closed, raising her eyebrows in silent question. You bite your lip and nod, shivering in anticipation. She undoes the careful bow you’d tied, easing it open and exposing your body to her hungry gaze.

If you felt heated before, you’re an inferno now. Her hands reverently map out every curve of your body. She leans down and plants a kiss above your belly button. It makes your stomach clench in want, but you make yourself lie there and take whatever she plans on giving you. Her kisses lead up your torso, until she’s eye level with your breasts, and before you can comprehend her movement, she’s taking one of your nipples into her mouth.

“God,” you whimper, head thrown back as you push your chest into her face.

“No,” Wanda giggles, “just me.”

You try to laugh, but it turns into a gasping moan when she pinches your other nipple between cold fingers. Your thighs attempt to close around her, yet it’s futile. Her free hand begins its descent down to the warm heat between your legs. Your hips buck into her touch, crying out when her fingers make contact with your clit.

“I’m going to do everything I can to make this feel good, okay? Let me take care of you.”

You nod quickly, your mouth going dry. When a single finger enters you, you forget how to breathe for a second, but then she’s sliding it out and back in, setting a steady rhythm, and you’re back to panting and whining. Only a few minutes later, though, you’re wriggling around, begging for more. She adds another finger and picks up the pace.

“Oh,” you gasp, your legs falling open wider.

Wanda buries her face in your neck, inhaling loudly, groaning. She licks across the skin there, nipping at you.

“Wanda,” you whimper.

“I know, my love,” she rasps. “You’re so close.”

Your hands have drifted above you, clutching at the pillows on the chaise, your hips moving in tandem with her fingers. Her thumb meets your clit, adding to the building warmth in your belly. It swells and swells, until finally, it has nowhere else to go and explodes within you.

You feel her teeth sink into your neck at the very same moment, and you can only yell brokenly into the air. Pain and pleasure war inside you, both white hot and searing, marrying themselves into a delicious and lethal combination. You can feel blood trickle down your throat, the same way you can still feel her fingers thrusting into you. It seems to never end and you grow limp beneath her, unable to handle the sensations flowing through you.

She finally slows, removing her teeth and licking over the wound. As her fingers slide free, she brushes your sweaty hair off your forehead with her clean hand.

“Sleep now,” she instructs, kissing you softly.

You can’t even attempt to argue, your body listening to her and promptly sending you into a deep slumber.

—

When you wake, before you even open your eyes, you’re aware of a few things.

To start, you’re no longer on the chaise. You’re on a luxurious bed, which is presumably Wanda’s. Your hearing is significantly better, as is your sense of smell. There’s a low thrum of energy coursing through your veins, like you’re on edge but don’t know why. But the more important thing you’re aware of is the feeling of eyes on you.

“I know you’re awake now.”

You crack open one eye and see Wanda smirking at you from the other end of the bed. You smile and sigh happily.

“How do you feel?” she asks.

You carefully sit up and stretch. You notice her ogling your still naked body and give her a smirk of your own. Shifting onto your knees, you crawl over the bed until you reach her and straddle her lap.

“Hungry,” you answer before grasping her face in your hands and attaching your mouth to hers.

With a force she hadn’t used before, she tosses you backward and is on top of you in a flash, a devilish smile on her tragically beautiful face.

“Good.”

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff fic #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff smut #vampire wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff #posting this and running

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slytherin-pen · 3 months

Text

Safe In His Arms

A/N: my first imagine, woo! i’ve known for awhile Cassian would be the first because he just gives me those mushy feels i need in x reader fics. this one is an emotional ride but i hope you love it nonetheless!

summary: You and Cassian found yourselves in a rare argument. Despite being mates, there were certain touchy subjects where you both held differing views. Cassian usually kept his composure around you, mindful of not scaring his beloved mate. But on this occasion, emotions ran high and Cassian's usual restraint slipped away. After going to the River House to allow you both space, Cassian returns to find you amid a panic attack. Determined to comfort you, he pulls out all the stops to show you just how cherished and secure you are in his arms.

pairing: Cassian x fem!reader

word count: 4.5k

banner credit to @cafekitsune

all ACOTAR credits belong to SJM

warnings: anxiety, ptsd, mentions of canon typical violence, mentions of parental abuse, very brief mention of suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, negative self-talk, swearing, brief mention of self-inflicted injuries (but not like that)

As the sun dipped behind the mountains in Velaris, it painted the House of Wind with hues of pink, purple, and blue. You were nestled into an armchair beside the crackling hearth, your legs and the skirt of your dress tucked under you, engrossed in one of the house's romance novels. The only other sound in the room was your ragged breaths and occasional sniffles. Although the spring air had begun to weave through the Night Court, the warmth of the fire provided a sense of comfort that no amount of blankets could replicate. Maybe it was the reminder of campfires in Illyria where you grew up. Or perhaps a certain Illyrian whose body heat was akin to the flames in the hearth.

You missed that body. Broad, muscular shoulders that were covered in his hard-earned Illyrian tattoos. Long black hair you could never resist running your fingers through. And his eyes, cauldron boil you, his eyes masterfully flecked with green and gold. It's as if the Mother herself took a paintbrush and carefully selected the perfect place for each color. You wished you could replace this chair with him and plant yourself in his loving arms. The only place you felt safe.

Snap out of it, you thought to yourself. You and Cassian argued this morning. You were supposed to be mad at him. He had gone to the River House in an attempt to give you both space to process what had been said, leaving the House of Wind to you. As if you could go anywhere else. You were an Illyrian with clipped wings. You couldn't fly and you couldn't winnow. You surely weren’t taking the ten thousand steps down the mountain.

It had been at least five hours since Cassian left, and for the mere fact he knows you can't leave without him, you hope he’ll come home soon. He knows how anxious you get when you feel trapped. Your anxiety was a contributing factor to why you and Cassian argued in the first place. It was also what sent you into a state of panic.

You two had been talking about future theoretical children when the concept of joining the Illyrian camps came up. You would never allow your children to experience the abuse you did growing up. Being close friends with the High Lord of the Night Court and living in Velaris, you couldn't fathom subjecting your children to the same horrors you endured when you were fortunate enough not to have to.

But, Cassian views it differently. The Illyrian mountains shaped him into the male he is today. He embraces his heritage, barring some of the less desirable aspects, and he would be honored to witness his children follow his legacy. Unlike you, Cassian was able to turn his past into something that motivated him. He always had something to prove. He always had a battle to win. You suppose you shouldn't expect anything different from the General. The Illyrians saw him as a bastard brute, and he would die before he accepted defeat in changing their minds. One day, he would show everyone he was more than a bastard, and Illyria was more than the culture of misogyny and violence it harbored.

Your past quite literally weighed you down in the form of wings dragging behind you. While the bat boys were raised in Windhaven, you grew up in Ironcrest. It had been as terrible as the gossip the mothers told around the fires in Windhaven. They felt lucky to have their lives as opposed to those in Ironcrest.

Your mother died when you were a child. You hadn't been home at the time, busy with your chores around the camp. When you came home, your father was sitting on the couch with his elbows resting on his knees and a glass of alcohol in one hand. He was drunk. Not that it was anything new. What was new were the scratch marks down his face and a bloody, still-healing stab wound in his right wing. You still don't believe the story he told that day. ‘Your mother lost it,’ he said. Your kind, gentle, nurturing mother who would never hurt anyone. Unless it was life or death, she had taught you that much. How to use your surroundings and the resources near you to defend yourself. Your mother knew it would happen one day. Your father had never laid a hand on you until she died, but you’d always known he had a temper and he frequently took it out on your mother. She would tell you to stay away and lock yourself in your room, and she would keep all of his attention on her until he left for the bar. But then she died, and suddenly, your nightmares became your reality. He didn’t even wait a week before he clipped your wings - after he had knocked you unconscious with his fists.

Your father had never been punished. In fact, he had been praised by his fellow warriors. You knew, if something happened to your children, no one would help them. You doubted you or Cassian could be there in time, every time. Something terrible would happen one day.

The whole conversation had stressed you out, sending you into a spiral of thoughts of doom, doom, doom. They were absurd, of course. Creating all these fake scenarios in your head as justification for your opinions about non-existent children. But Cassian had well and truly riled you up. He couldn’t help himself when his pride was hurt, he felt backed into a corner, and he couldn’t stop the harsh words from tumbling out of his mouth. You attacked his pride, so he hit you where it hurt right back.

You never told him everything about what happened to you, not just the kind of life you were escaping, but how you got away and why you were so hurt when you arrived in Windhaven. You told them that you were running from your father, he had clipped your wings and intended to sell you to a vile male. Not far from the truth considering marrying you off was definitely on his agenda at some point. But you explained away your injuries by claiming as a defenseless female running through camps alone, you got into some trouble along the way. Rhysand and Cassian believed you. Azriel being the Spymaster remained skeptical. Not of your intentions, but your injuries did not add up to a couple of scuffles. He let it go, though. He understood not being ready to share the full, brutal truth.

But because of Cassian’s ignorance of the situation, he never understood why you were so jumpy, scared of the dark, and constantly afraid of things you couldn’t explain. Why you had such crippling anxiety that caused you to leave parties early. Why you rarely joined the Inner Circle at Rita’s. Why you have panic attacks over the smallest things. Your biggest insecurity was how different you were from him. He was the big, brave, Lord of Bloodshed. He killed people regularly for cauldron's sake. And you, the damsel in distress who can’t even walk alone down the stairs at night. You were powerless, defenseless, and flightless. The complete opposite of him. You were supposed to be his equal, according to the Mother, but you couldn’t help but worry about whether she got it wrong. Whether she shackled him to the wrong female, for eternity.

Him calling you dramatic was an arrow to your heart. It hurt. He hadn’t meant for you to take it to heart like that, he was referring to the current situation. But you couldn’t help yourself in thinking it was a secret he’d kept, just waiting for him to lose a little restraint before it slipped through his lips. Here it is, you thought. The moment you’ve feared since you and Cassian began courting. He would realize how pathetic you were compared to him. How you were more like a skittish child than the equal to a warrior.

When he left, you spiraled further and further down until you couldn’t breathe.

He’s going to leave you.

He’s not coming back.

He will find a female more worthy of him and bed her.

You didn’t want to believe the lies your anxiety told you, but without Cassian there to ground you, you were bound to crash. The panic attack was sudden; like a thunderstorm in the summertime. You thrashed and wailed, clawing at your neck just so desperate for air. Unsurprisingly, that was all entirely unhelpful and you eventually tired out on the floor by the fire. When you woke from your brief nap, you crawled to the armchair and asked the House for a book. You were utterly numb, but at least you could read about other people’s feelings.

Just as you neared the end of the chapter you heard the front door open and heavy boots step through the foyer. Finally. Keeping your eyes open was becoming difficult, the soft crackle of the fire lulling you to sleep. It was important to you both that you always talked things out eventually, specifically before you went to sleep at night. ‘Never go to bed angry,’ had been your promise to each other. As he approached the library, you gathered ‘eventually’ was right now.

Cassian slowly pushed the door open, the House purposefully causing the door to creak as he did so. He suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at that. Once he was through the threshold, he could see you facing the fire, turned away from him slightly. His hair was tied into a bun and his wings were tucked in tightly behind him. He took slow, careful steps as he approached. In his mind, you may as well be an injured animal. He knew he fucked up and he would deserve every snarl and lash of claws you gave him. His fierce, resilient, compassionate mate. You were a force to be reckoned with when you wanted to be. Before he left the River House, he needed his brothers to give him the confidence to face you. Your sharp tongue could slice him into a thousand pieces if you will it. And he prayed to the cauldron you wouldn't, but if that's what you needed from him, he would stand there and take it.

But as he grew closer to you and took in the dried tear stains down your cheek, red puffy eyes, and your mess of hair falling out of its braid- he realized you were not on the attack as he had expected. You just stared at the closed book in your lap, tapping the cover rhythmically with the nails of your thumbs, jaw clenched shut. Fuck, you were anxious. Probably had been for hours now. He knew he shouldn’t have left you but he couldn’t let himself, or you, continue down the path of spitting insults at each other. Plenty of lovers in his past had preferred those methods during arguments, but the two of you had never been like that and he didn’t plan to start today.

Cassian knelt in front of you and a pained expression took over his face as he noticed the raised marks down your neck. With his large, shaking hands, he removed the book from your lap and placed it on the side table. “Sweetheart,” he whispered as he enclosed your hands in his.

You had tried to prepare yourself for this. You wanted to be brave, talk this through like mature adults, but now that he was here his words rang through your ears like temple bells.

‘You’re being dramatic.’ You knew he meant how seriously you were taking the theoretical future lives of your children and not you, but in the moment it had felt more like a dig. You were dramatic. You had your anxiety to thank for that. Hypothetical, hypothetical, hypothetical. Your mind was consumed with hypotheticals every day and he had given you the signal to run with it. Until it went too far and you practically had steam coming out of your ears while Cassian paced back and forth muttering curses to the cauldron. That’s when he decided to leave for a few hours, which quickly became six after asking Rhys for relationship advice turned into him, Rhys and Azriel finishing a bottle of wine together.

You released a shaking breath as you tilted your head up to meet his gaze. Your eyes immediately welled with tears at the hurt across his face. Hurt for you. Hurt for him. You both said things you shouldn’t have.

Cassian didn’t hesitate to lift you before sitting down in the chair and settling you across his lap at the sight of your tears. He knew he had a temper and the Mother knew he tried so hard to keep it under control for you. When you first met, he was acting as General accompanied by the High Lord and Shadowsinger. They had come into the healer's tent to interrogate you about where you came from and you had been utterly terrified. Too terrified to even speak. Rhysand had let it go long enough for you to be treated and calmed down. You looked harmless enough and had been severely injured. He doubted you were looking to pick a fight in that state.

When they returned, you had been healed, cleaned, and fed. Looking less like the almost-corpse a couple of warriors dragged in a few hours prior and more like the beautiful female he held today. The bond snapped for you both a couple of months later, but Cassian courted you like a proper gentleman. He understood that mating bond or not, he had to earn your trust and your love. You had been hurt before and you weren’t going to so easily allow yourself to be vulnerable again.

The mating ceremony happened a year ago but you both had so much love for each other it felt like it had been hundreds. Cassian was going to make sure you knew that hadn’t changed, remind you that he loved you more than the stars loved the night. “Sweetheart I’m so sorry. What I said, i-it was terrible. And I didn’t mean to make you feel like I thought you, overall, were dramatic. It was a poor choice of words and I’m sorry.”

You burrowed your head into the crook of his shoulder and tightened your arms around his neck, shielding your face from his assessing stare. He was doing a damage check. He's not surprised a fight between you would cause a panic attack. Surprising or not, you hated how you reacted when things got tense or stressful. You always wanted to be strong like Cass, or unwavering like Mor. But behind the ferocious mask you could put on when you felt vulnerable and defenseless, you were still a traumatized female. A female who is still afraid any mistake could cause you to be sent back to Ironcrest. Afraid that any angered male might still strike you, despite being proven wrong by the gentle, giant bats of the Inner Circle. You could feel the mask crumpling. It had started falling apart ever since you became aware of his presence. You could never hide yourself from him.

The pads of his fingers brushed the hair out of your face. “Look at me, baby.” His voice was hoarse, his throat constricting at the thought of how upset you must have been, and he had left you alone.

You slowly turned your head away from his shoulder and looked up at him. You took a ragged breath before you spoke. “It’s okay,” you whispered. “I’m sorry too.”

He guided your hand up to the collar of his shirt, a spot he knew you liked to hold onto when you were anxious. The fabric in your grip and the faint thumps of his nearby heartbeat grounded you. “What happened here,” he asked, tracing the angry skin on your neck with tender knuckles.

You wiggled to get up, but he only reinforced his hold on you. “I’m fine, Cass please-”

“Shhh.” He gently pushed your head back to his chest and kissed the crown of your head. “Don’t lie to me, sweetheart. We both know you aren't fine right now. Tell me what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours.”

You shook your head. Despite the heaving of your chest, and your body still sensing something wrong, you repeated; “I’m fine.”

“I can hear your heartbeat pounding like a drum. You know I’m here for you when it comes to these things. I’m your mate, this,”-he motioned to you in his lap- “is what I’m here for.” He started running his fingers through your hair, coaxing you to tilt your face towards him again. “Let me be here for you. Not just physically, but emotionally too. I know there… are things you haven’t told me about where you came from.”

Your whole body stiffened at that. He hates you. He thinks you’re a liar. He’s going to leave you. “Hey, sweetheart, look at me,” his stern, concerned voice swam through the muffling of your thoughts. He gripped your chin and you realized while you were looking at him, you couldn’t see him. It was all so cloudy and distorted. Tears. You’re crying again, damnit. And you weren’t breathing. How long had you not been breathing? You could feel your face heat and the thump, thump, thump of your heart hammereing around in your skull.

“Deep breaths for me, baby. In and out,” Cassian’s voice sounded again. You attempted to gasp for air but all that did was release the wrack of sobs that you had been barely keeping contained. He squeezed your waist and rocked you back and forth. “It’s alright. Let it out. I’m here.” Your hand found his shirt again and you gripped it like your life depended on it. Tears fell onto his shoulders and before your other hand could scratch at your thigh, he took it and started to rub your knuckles with his thumb. He knew it would be bad, but he didn’t expect this bad. Guilt gnawed away at him. Some mate he was, leaving you alone in a time of need. You were having two panic attacks within hours of each other, no doubt draining your little body. “I’m not going anywhere, baby,” he choked out. “I won’t leave you again, I’m so sorry. So fucking sorry. I will stay here for as long as you need, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

Cassian knew, with a heavy heart, that he had discovered the magic words. Your wailing sobs turned to soft, shuddering breaths and he felt you finally hold his hand in return as you came back to reality. “You know I would never leave you right, sweet girl,” he asked with a strained voice.

The silence that followed was deafening. Cassian released a shaking breath of his own. “Alright,” he croaked. Now that you could see his face again, you noticed the silver lining his eyes. You did this to him. You hurt his feelings. “I’m going to ask you a question, and I need you to be completely honest with me, baby. Can you do that for me?”

You gave him a small nod, the slight movement sent your head into another throbbing fit.

“Why would you think I’d leave you? Over one argument?”

Your eyes were still glazed over as you stared past him. “Because he’d always leave after. He was never sorry,” you whispered.

Cassian’s hold tightened around you on instinct. “Who?”

You took your bottom lip between your teeth before you spoke. “My dad. He used to hurt me, Cass, that’s- it’s why I’m like this,” you exasperated gesturing to yourself. You turned away from his glare to face the fire, stopping the scold right on his tongue. Fine. He could remind you not to talk about yourself like that later. “He killed my mom, I think. No one but him knows what happened that day, but I knew my mom. And I know him. I don't need Azriel to put the clues together for me. I was so young and scared when it happened I never questioned him to his face. But as I got older, I grew more defiant and he hated it. He’d say I was worse than my mother. But my mother would only let him when she had to protect me. I only had myself to protect, but it was useless. I couldn’t fly and I was so much smaller, so much weaker than him. I just- I just wanted it to end.”

Cassian swallowed thickly. “What do you mean you wanted it to end?”

“It was so stupid,” you huffed. “I thought, maybe if I pushed him far enough he just wouldn’t stop. He wouldn’t stop unt- until I didn’t have to live with him anymore. But my self-preservation kicked in at some point. I hit him with one of the dining chairs, and then I just started throwing everything in my reach at him until he collapsed.” Tears trickled down your face but they were slower, calmer than the ones from earlier. “I didn’t pause to check if he was still alive. I just ran. I ran out the back door and I didn’t stop until I could feel my body shutting down. I would hide. Sleep. Then start running again before dawn. It took me two weeks to get to Windhaven. I didn’t know where I was. I thought I was dead when those males started dragging me through the camp.”

Cassian was crying now. War General be damned, his mate had been through Hell, and she kept it to herself all this time. “Why didn’t you tell me,” he croaked. “We asked you what happened that day and- and you said-“ His jaw snapped shut. He should’ve known. Cauldron, some part of him had known. He may not be the Spymaster but your injuries had been severe. He had so easily believed some cruel, passing Illyrians had done that to you but it all made so much more sense now. Not just what happened to you that day, but the fear that kept you in a chokehold day in and day out. The constant anxiety, looking over your shoulder around every corner, eyes constantly roaming the room for threats.

“I didn’t tell you because, well, originally I just wasn’t ready. Then we found out we were mates and I felt all this pressure to be your equal and I was scared if you found out I wasn’t-“

“I’m going to stop you right there,” Cassian’s commanding tone cut through. “You are my equal. Sweetheart, you don’t ever need to step on a battlefield or wield a sword to be my equal. In fact, I’d prefer it if you never did,” he said with a wink. “But you are strong. You are so strong. What you survived with your dad, and crossing Illyria alone, takes strength. Strength that even some of the warriors in my legion don’t have.”

You looked at him through your wet lashes and he took the chance to wipe away your tears with his thumb. “I never thought of it like that,” you whispered.

Cassian shot you a crooked grin. “That’s what I’m here for.” He gave your forehead a tender kiss and you let your eyelids close as you felt the warmth of his lips seep into your skin. “Have you eaten yet?”

The feral growl that erupted from your stomach was answer enough, causing you to blush. Cassian chuckled as he stood with you in his arms, careful of your drooping wings, and walked towards the dining room. “We need to fix that don’t we?”

You nodded sheepishly. “Time got away from me a little bit.”

“It’s alright, sweet girl. We’ll get you fed and then in bed. I’m sure you’re exhausted,” he suggested, earning a nod from you.

As he sat down at the table with you in his lap again, the House immediately provided a spread of small chocolates, fruits, and bread across the table. A second later a pot and two tea cups appeared in front of you and Cassian. “Thank you, House,” you giggled. You still weren’t used to just how sentient the house was. It knew you couldn’t eat a proper meal after the day you had, and instead opted for your favorite, comforting snacks.

Cassian poured tea into the cups and handed yours to you. “My lady,” he grinned. You hadn’t realized how thirsty you were until the sweetness of the honey started to soothe the scratchiness in your throat from all the crying, and you finished the cup instantly. You blushed even more as Cassian refilled your cup with a smile. “Good thing the house makes the pot bottomless.”

“I still don’t understand how all that works. I don’t have any magic so maybe I’m just stu-“ Cassian plopped a piece of chocolate into your mouth with a glare, hazel eyes blazing with determination.

“Do not,” the cold ferocity in his voice left no room for argument, “finish that sentence.” He clenched his jaw as his eyes bore into yours. He felt your body trembling slightly, cursed the cauldron internally, and cupped your cheek, brushing his thumb back and forth along your cheekbone. “You can’t talk about yourself like that, baby. You can’t. I love you. You understand? I love you, and it pains me to hear you say those things about yourself. I can’t even imagine what goes on in your head. I know it’s what you’re used to, it was all you had, and your damned father is to blame for it, but it’s not like that anymore. He can’t hurt you here, and I’ll kill the bastard myself if I ever see him, but you’re safe. You’re safe here with me, in our home, in my arms. You don’t have to go through this alone anymore, sweetheart. And I will spend the rest of our lifetime replacing every harsh word you say about yourself if that’s what it takes to prove you are worthy of my love and I will never leave you.”

You threw your arms around him and nuzzled into his neck. “I love you too, Cass. Thank you. I love you-“ your voice cracked as the raw emotion took over your chest. Cauldron, you loved him. How does he always know what you need to hear? He had learned a thing or two from the Spymaster, no doubt.

“Shhh. I got you,” he said as he tightened the arm around your waist and cradled your head with the other. “I love you so much.” He kissed the side of your head. “I’m so sorry about today. Let’s never fight again, agreed,” he asked with a chuckle.

You smiled as you inhaled his scent of snow, sandalwood, and burning fires. Safe. You were safe here, with your mate. In his arms where you always belonged. “Agreed.”

#cassian imagine #cassian x you #cassian x y/n #cassian x reader #cassian #acotar x you #acotar x y/n #acotar fic #acotar fanfiction #acotar x reader #cassian x fem!reader #acotar #acotar fandom

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sweeterlovers · 3 months

Text

FOREVER ONE PART #2 / CHARLES LECLERC

charles leclerc x childhood friend and ex gf reader / SMAU FIC

FACE CLAIM / none!

WARNINGS / none!

INSTAGRAM

liked by pierregasly, arthur_leclerc, and 65,668 others

yourusername never thought i would attend a formula one race but here i am! other than that my weekend was filled with flowers and relaxation 🤍

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user6 WHATT WHAT

user66 my exact reaction when she came up on my screen during the race

user9 wait when did they show her doing the race?

user66 it was during a red flag earlier in the race, she was also in the ferrari garage!

user7 ooooooooooo!!

user99 cute cute!

user07 i wonder who got her the flowers? 🤔

user2 i wonder who??? 😭😭

arthur_leclerc it was great to see you again yn!!

yourusername it’s been forever! you’ve grown so much 🥹

arthur_leclerc your only three years older than me???

yourusername and?? still older 🤦‍♀️

user88 did you enjoy the race yn?

yourusername it was great!! definitely different from the f2 races i’ve been to!

INSTAGRAM

charles_leclerc just posted a story!

liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc, and 14,573 others

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user9 how casual

yourusername charles you ruined my soft launch 🥹🥹

charles_leclerc sorry mon amour [my love]

user0 cutie pies☺️

leclerc_pascale you guys are adorable! i’m glad you guys finally worked things out 🩶

charles_leclerc i am too! i really love her maman

INSTAGRAM

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, and 66,925 others

yourusername we had a lot of up and downs throughout our relationship, we grew up as friends who saw each other as family. although our romantic relationship didn’t work out the first time, i knew we would come around again. i think that’s how i know we are meant for each other because even when we broke up i knew it wasn’t forever.

“we kissed beneath the twisted trees, our lips between the stars, tiny ripples in a lake, this love, once lost, is ours.” - michael faudet

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user80 i’m crying 😭 😭

user3 I KNOW!!!!!

user23 that quote broke my heart and stitched it back up

charles_leclerc it’s been a journey but one i would gladly go through again if it meant i would end up with you

yourusername i love you charles 🤍

user0 took them long enough 🤦‍♂️

lorenzotl ❤️❤️

yourusername ☺️🤍

arthur_leclerc i’m glad everything worked out for you guys, i can’t imagine charles with anyone else

yourusername arthur i’m going to cry 😿 your to sweet

arthur_leclerc does that mean i’m your favourite leclerc?

yourusername my number one will always be pascale 😊

user3 we all love pascale!

pierregasly congratulations 🎉

charles_leclerc thank you pierre!

yourusername 💖💖💖

leclerc_pascale i’ve been waiting for this moment ever since you two became friends as children

yourusername I LOVE YOU PASCALE ❤️❤️

charles_leclerc thank you maman!

user77 i love them!!!!!!!!!!

TEAM RADIO / SWEETERLOVERS - finished part two of forever one! i hope you guys enjoy!!

#formula 1 #sweeterlovers #f1 fanfic #f1 smau #formula one #f1 fic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc instagram au #charles leclerc smau #charles leclerc x female reader

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ellecdc · 3 months

Note

elle elle elle can i request something with moon water killer (i think that's with barty?😭) with a reader inspired by the song Matilda by harry styles???

Since i saw you haven't gotten many requests with song inspo

omg! I'd never heard this song before! it's really beautiful, so thank you for sharing! also....I hope I did it justice <3 ** .... fuck ok I posted this and noticed you perhaps asked for reader to be Matilda coded? sorry I didn't catch that at the time

poly!moonwaterkiller x fem!reader who exceed expectations

CW: mention of Barty & Regulus' shitty childhoods and families (but nothing is described), lyrics are in a different font & the lyrics I inserted directly into the fic are in blue

You don’t have to be sorry for leaving and growing up. You don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own.

Being born a Black came with a lot of expectations.

A young Black was expected to be well-groomed at all times, to be quiet, obedient, well-mannered, and have proper etiquette training.

They were expected to be dutiful sons and daughters, driven and successful students, and to keep up the family’s good name.

They were expected to grow into robotic adults, find a partner who was probably not too distantly related from them, and raise the next generation of Black children who would then wash, rinse, and repeat.

Regulus Black expected the same for himself.

He expected to be a dutiful son, a diligent student, a successful heir to the Black family name, and produce a suitable offspring who would amount to much the same.

And by some brilliant stroke of luck, he did not meet those expectations.

Though he tried to be a dutiful son, and he was indeed a diligent student, it hadn’t seemed to be quite enough for Orion and Walburga Black.

And it wasn’t until Sirius left that Regulus realised that it would never be enough for them.

So he left, too.

You can let it go.

And when Regulus believed that there was lingering Darkness that flowed through his veins, he had found three people who saw the Light in him… even when he couldn’t.

And Regulus won’t bore everyone with the details; but somehow that Light brought him here, to this day, with these people.

And though both you and Remus were privy to the life Regulus lived growing up, neither of you truly understood it; and Regulus was happy for it.

But Barty did.

Barty knew what it felt like to never live up to the expectations that came with your Name, to be perpetually wrong and disgraceful, and unfortunately that the consequences of such were really quite high.

But they made it. They made it out.

Though it was not without scars.

Birthday’s had always been somewhat touchy for Barty, which may seem strange for the boisterous, egotistical, cocky son-of-a-bitch that everyone knew Barty to be.

A whole day? Dedicated to you? Where people were obligated to shower you with love and gifts? What self-absorbed, high-performing only child wouldn’t like that?

Barty didn’t.

Though Regulus supposed it was less that Barty didn’t like the idea, and more that birthday’s had never been a positive experience so he never quite knew how to handle them.

But - God love you both - you and Remus were determined to change that; and Regulus thought you might actually be succeeding.

Because Regulus stood in the backyard of his small, cosy, modest townhouse with string lights hanging between beams and bannisters, basking the space in a golden glow as the small fire crackled and music played softly from Evan’s sound system that he brought for the event.

The event being Barty’s birthday.

Everyone Barty loved was crammed into the small space; and the people Barty claimed not to love but rather tolerate (read: Remus’ friends) had shown up too.

Throw a party full of everyone you know.

Regulus had the prime view from where he stood leaning against the wooden fence; some drink in his hand that Potter insisted was “so sodding good, mate, you’ll love it” - that Regulus could admit wasn’t horrid - as he watched Remus twirl you around in sloppy circles that the two of you seemed to think was a dance (years of proper etiquette and dance training would have Regulus saying otherwise). You threw your head back in a laugh that echoed in Regulus’ rib cage as Remus dipped you low; his honey brown curls glowing ethereally in the golden glow of the string lights as he pulled you back up to your full height to press a kiss to your lips.

And Regulus’ prime viewing location also allowed him to watch Barty as he, too, watched the two of you.

Barty always talked of the pain like it’s alright; ever the comedian, he was always able to play off some of the most traumatic stories from his childhood as funny. And Regulus understood that; nothing about the way either of them had been treated had ever seemed especially alarming until now…until they saw that it could be better, that it should be better.

Barty had been laughing and chatting with Evan, Pandora, Dorcas, and Marlene from the deck, but he had since opted to lean against the bannister as he watched two of his lovers enjoy the party; his party.

A party that Barty likely never imagined…expected for himself, a party that would have seemed impossible years ago.

If the subtle glisten in Barty’s eyes and the mystified look on his face was enough to go by; the sentiment was not lost on Barty, either.

Their eyes met then; two boys whose families never showed them love who moved on to find freedom in love and a family that they started all on their own.

It should have been impossible for Barty’s face to soften anymore than it had been as he watched you and Remus dancing, but it seemed to do just that when he shot Regulus a wink.

Regulus raised his glass to his boyfriend then; to growing up, to moving on, to showing love, to their little family.

And to exceeding every expectation either of them ever had for themselves.

348 notes · View notes

idyllic-ghost · 7 months

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title: The Other Woman (REWORKED) pairing: CEO!Mingyu x fem!reader genre: romance, found family, angst, fluff, smut warnings: mentions of not being able to have children, mentions of death (mingyu is widowed), smut (MDNI), oral (f and m receiving), p in v sex, unprotected sex, dirty talk concerning being better in bed than someone else, mentions of being sick (mingyu gets a cold), slight miscommunication angst synopsis: You’re married to Wonwoo, but his father desperately wants him to have a child - which you cannot have. He gives into his parents wishes and meets the other woman, whom he eventually agrees to marry as well. You’re left heartbroken for a few years, seeing the man you love build a family that you had always wanted, but happiness is on the horizon as you meet someone new. wordcount: 31k taglist: @enhacolor, @shuabby1994, @junhui-recs, @dkakapizzaboy, @just-here-to-read-01, @loviehan, @userjunhuii, @novalpha, @bubblymoon, @aaniag

a/n: the other woman is probably my most popular fic series, but i've always hated it. i felt like it was rushed, and not well thought out - so i've remade it (same plot, just a few minor changes)! thank you so much for 3k followers! consider this my thanks for sticking around <3

thank you @wongyuseokie for beta reading this!

join my taglist - masterlists read the original mini-series: part one, part two, part three

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

PART ONE.

The sun managed to peek into the bedroom through the blinds, stirring you awake. As you moved around slightly, trying to stretch the sleep out of the limbs, you felt the man beside you grip onto your waist. “Stay,” Wonwoo murmured in his raspy morning voice.

You turn to Wonwoo, putting your hands in his hair, and look down at him. His head was by your chest, resting his forehead against your bare skin. He got home late last night, staying at work until the sun was far down behind the horizon. You had dressed up for him last evening, wearing a new slip dress that he had gotten for you, but you managed to fall asleep before he got home. Mornings like these were unusual and always welcomed.

“I wasn’t planning on leaving,” you said. “I took the day off too.”

“Lucky me.” He looked up at you with a grin. “I feel bad for the kids, though… they don’t get to see their favorite teacher.”

“I’m not their favorite,” you correct him. “And they’ll be fine if I’m gone for just one day… it’s worth it for this.”

Wonwoo leaned up to your face and placed a kiss on your lips, then mumbled something about you being perfect. You watched him sit up and reach for his glasses, enjoying the view of his naked form. You had lucked out - your husband was the most handsome man you’ve ever laid eyes on. He turned to you again, giving you a soft smile.

“You look beautiful,” he said and reached over to touch your silky nightdress. “Is it the one I got for you?”

“Of course,” you murmured. “I put it on for you last night, but you got home later than usual.”

“I know.” Wonwoo sighed. “I’m sorry, baby.”

“It’s okay… make it up for me?” With a big grin, he got on top of you and gave you another kiss. Your arms wrapped around his neck as his lips traveled down your jaw to your neck. It’s been a while since you got to have this kind of morning, and it was just what you needed.

After you got out of the shower, you patted yourself dry with a towel before you changed into one of Wonwoo’s shirts. Wonwoo, who was already one step ahead of you, was making coffee in the kitchen. You had done this hundreds of times before; Wonwoo handed you a cup of coffee which you accepted and watched as he took out a few leftover side dishes from the fridge.

“Have you heard from your father yet?” you asked.

“Last night…” Wonwoo sighed. “We’ll meet him at the restaurant.”

“And you don’t know what he wants?”

“Not really.” He walks over to you after putting the side dishes on the counter. “Let’s not think about it- we took a day off so that we could spend a calm day before having to meet with him.”

“I know I just…” You took a deep breath. “I know how he feels about me. It feels weird that he asked to see us both.”

“Hey, don’t do that.” Wonwoo put his hands on your upper arms. “I don’t care what he says. You’re my wife. You come first.”

Despite his kind words, you can’t help the feeling of anxiety growing in your chest. Later that day, after hours of cuddling up on the couch and doing nothing together, you were getting ready for dinner. You had dolled yourself up - your makeup and hair were done, but your dress was still lying on the bed. Wonwoo always liked it when you walked around in his clothes, and you enjoyed his eyes on you.

“Do you think he’s just doing it as a formality? It is our anniversary soon…” you thought out loud. “It’s not like him, but maybe,” he hummed.

“Could you help me with my tie, honey?” He never actually needed help with his tie, but he knew it put your mind off of things if you did something with your hands. You walked up to him and took hold of the two ends of his tie.

“You look pretty,” Wonwoo said. “I’m not even dressed up yet,” you huffed. “Still pretty.”

You tried and failed to stop yourself from smiling. Wonwoo always knew how to make you feel better, even if it was just temporary. As soon as you had finished his tie, you went to put on your dress. As you pulled the straps over your shoulder, Wonwoo came up behind you to pull up the zipper. He pressed a kiss on your shoulder and slowly pulled the zipper up, and the feeling of his fingers against your skin sent a shiver down your spine.

“Let’s get this dinner over with,” he muttered in your ear, “I already want to have you for myself.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ The restaurant was scarce of customers, but it still felt like you were taking up too much space. Wonwoo sat next to you at the table. His father was late, but when he finally approached the table, Wonwoo grabbed your hand and squeezed it. As you ate, the atmosphere was thick. Except for the usual small talk, none of you said much. While you were waiting for the second course, the topic of children was brought up by Wonwoo’s father.

“Father…” your husband sighed. “I’m allowed to ask about the company’s heir, aren’t I?”

“Of course you are, sir.” You put a hand on Wonwoo’s knee. “We’ve been talking about adoption, right?” Before Wonwoo could answer you, his father interrupted him.

“Adoption?” He scoffed. “Then it’s not your real child, though, is it?”

“We’ve talked about this,” Wonwoo said. “The doctor said-”

“That she can’t have children, I know.” His father interrupted him again. “I just think there are other ways.” You looked at Wonwoo with a big clump in your throat, but he refused to meet your gaze.

“What do you mean? Surrogacy?” Wonwoo asked. “No, I just mean that… if this relationship with Y/N isn’t working out, then maybe you should find someone else- a mistress.” Wonwoo’s father spoke as if you weren’t in the room with them.

“Dad, I’m not cheating on my wife-”

“Don’t call it a mistress then.” He shrugged. “Call it a new wife. You can always remarry.”

“Father-”

“You need an heir.”

“I’ve heard enough.” You stood up. “If you’re going to talk like I’m not even here, then I don’t want to be here. You’ll just find any reason to hate me, won’t you? We’re going through with surrogacy if we’re going to have children. I don’t care what you think about it.”

As you stormed out, you noticed that Wonwoo didn’t immediately follow after you. His absence worried you, but you still went through with getting your coat checked out and walking out of the restaurant to hail a cab. Finally, Wonwoo came out after you and grabbed your hand.

“Y/N-” “Why didn’t you defend me in there?” you questioned him. “You just let him degrade me like that in front of you!”

“Let’s just talk about this, he-”

“You know how hard I’ve been trying.” Tears were welling up in your eyes. “I want to have a family with you, Wonwoo, you know that. It’s hard for me, and hearing him say that hurts. His ‘suggestion’ is off the table if you’re even thinking about staying married to me. It’s so fucking obvious he just wants you to leave me, he won’t even accept surrogacy- if you try to reason with him, I don’t know you anymore.” A cab stopped in front of you, and you opened up the door.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m staying at my mother’s place. I need to be alone,” you said. “But we need to talk about this-” He reached for you, and you pulled back.

“Don’t touch me!” You yelled and got in the cab.

When you got to your mother’s apartment, she was waiting for you with open arms. You had told her what had happened through text while you were in the cab. She was just about ready to go to the restaurant and curse out Wonwoo’s father herself.

“What a heartless man!” she exclaimed as she held you in her arms.

“It’s alright, Mom.” You sighed. “I’m going to go back home tomorrow and talk about it with Wonwoo.”

“You know he’s to blame here, too, right?”

“Mom… Wonwoo didn’t do anything.”

“Exactly.” She pulled back from the hug. “He should’ve stood up for you, honey.”

“Can we not talk about this, please?”

“Alright, just come inside.” You walked into her apartment and slept on her couch for the night.

The text you wake up to the next morning isn’t what you wanted. It was a short “We need to talk” text from Wonwoo. You answered by saying that you’d be home when he was home from work, and all you received back was “good”. Good. That’s all he had to say after what his father had said to you last night. Nevertheless, you went back home and waited for your husband.

“My father introduced me to someone else,” were words you never expected to hear from Wonwoo’s mouth. You were already sobbing, sitting on the couch in your living room. He was cold, not rubbing your back or bringing you in for a hug. You’ve never wanted his comfort more than right now.

“Listen, Y/N,” he said. “I’ll marry her- she’ll have my children-” Your loud sob interrupted him, and he finally touched you for the first time since last night. His hand on your back left a burning mark. “I’ll come back to you.”

“What?” You looked at him, your vision blurry from tears.

“After I get an heir, which is the only thing that my father wants, I’ll come back to you,” he explained.

“Wonwoo, that’s insane-”

“Don’t you understand? After I get an heir, my father will be out of our lives- it’s all he wants from me.”

He took your hands in his, holding them gently and bringing them up to his lips to kiss your knuckles. Your eyebrows furrowed, and you had trouble understanding what he was truly thinking. How was this easier than just cutting off his dad? You assumed he had talked with him about it, but you were left in the dark.

“And you think this will work?”

“Yes- I believe in us.”

“Fine… I trust you.”

Once the divorce was finalized, and Wonwoo had moved out, you realized just how big your apartment was. He had left you the place to not burden you with the troubles of moving. The woman Wonwoo married, Gyeong Hui, was one of the most beautiful women you’ve ever seen. She was gracious and poised, and she was everything that Wonwoo’s father expected from his son’s wife. For the first few months, you keep close contact with your ex-husband. But as time passes, your relationship fades. His final call to you was a normal Thursday afternoon. There was no warning, and it somehow made it worse.

“Gyeong Hui is pregnant…” Wonwoo said. “I don’t think I can… I just realized how fragile the situation is- I can’t leave the mother of my child. I’m sorry, Y/N.”

All you could manage to say was, “It’s okay”, and even then, your voice was breaking. You hang up before he can say anything else and pack up a few things to go live with your mother. Social media was a hellhole, seeing them move to the suburbs together- Wonwoo always said he hated the suburbs. Your dream together was to have a small family in the apartment that you had together… all of it, your wishes and your dreams, was gone. Your mom tried her best to cheer you up. She offered to have girls’ night, to go get your nails done, or spend the evening drinking wine and watching rom-coms. None of it sounded appealing to you, and you instead opted to stay in bed most of the time. You only went up to eat or use the bathroom, sometimes going for a walk or trying to get some other form of movement in. She gave up eventually, or so you thought. A year and a half had passed since you broke it off when your mom approached you at the breakfast table.

“Here, look at this,” she shoved her phone in front of your face.

“A cabin?”

“Cottage,” she corrected you. “It’s your aunt’s, and it’s absolutely dreamlike. It’s in the middle of nowhere, in a beautiful forest, and close to a lake.”

“It does look beautiful.” You looked through the photos.

“I’ve been asking her to borrow it forever,” she explained. “And she finally said it’ll be empty for a couple of weeks.”

“Oh? Are you gonna go?” You gave her back her phone. “I was thinking it’d be nice for you to get out into nature… you can borrow my car and go out there right now. Get off your phone and get to spend some time with yourself.”

“Mom-”

“And if you don’t want to be alone, she has a lot of neighbors!”

“Mom-”

“I just think it’s perfect for you, darling,” she said. “It’ll be good, I promise.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ You decide to take your mom’s advice. The drive there was beautiful, but when you arrived you realized it wouldn’t be all that therapeutic - for you, it was mostly bug bites and muddy shoes. The houses were beautiful, especially your aunt’s cottage. The red brick contrasted nicely with the dark roof - and there was ivy growing on the side of the building. No house looked the same. It was your favorite thing about this place. Your neighbor had a cute yellow house, and the one next to that one was blue. It continued for a few more cottages, and they all looked adorable. The outside was gorgeous, but the inside was like nothing you had ever seen before. It felt like walking into a Ghibli movie. The wooden floors creaked under your feet, the walls had a beautiful green wallpaper with flowers, and everything was decorated in a cohesive maximalist style. It wasn’t as big as the other houses, but still had two levels - the second floor only being a bedroom and bathroom - and it was more than enough for you. So, you spent your time indoors, and you realized that you did want to be alone… but, of course, your neighbors couldn’t know that. Most of them were retired, but a few of them were only a little older than you. They told you that they just wanted to come check on who the new person could be. There couldn’t be a lot happening there if you were the biggest piece of gossip to talk about. As more neighbors decided to stop by, you grew more tired of their visits - even if they were short-lived. So when there was another knock at your door, you didn’t open it with a smile.

“Hello?”

In front of you stood a gorgeous, tall man. Black short hair, golden tan skin, and a body that was practically built by the gods. He was wearing sweatpants and a white t-shirt with paint splatter on it. Not wanting to seem like a creep, you looked up at his face again. However, when meeting his eyes, you were filled with a sense of calm. They were kind and well-meaning, which made your sour welcome all the more embarrassing.

“I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Kim Mingyu.” He took his hand off a plastic box and reached it out to you. His handshake was strong, but not in the way that men usually tried to display their dominance. You didn’t know if it was in your head, but it felt safe - protective. Maybe it was just the lack of men in your life at the moment, but you were tingling at his touch.

“I’m Jeo…. Y/L/N Y/N.” You took your hand back from his hold. “My aunt let me stay here for a bit.” Almost saying your ex’s last name, instead of your own, in front of this handsome stranger felt horrifying. But Mingyu didn’t seem to notice, or he pretended not to for your sake.

“Well, I’m your next-door neighbor- so if there’s anything you need, you can let me know.” Friendly and hot. This might have been the luckiest you’ve felt in over a year.

“Oh, is it your cottage?”

“No, no- it’s my parents’ place. I’m just fixing it up for them so that they can enjoy it during the summer months,” he explained and looked down at his box. “Oh, right. I got you a little welcome gift- I don’t know if you like muffins, but…”

He held it out to you, and you finally got a proper look at it. The bottom of it was read, but the top was see-through. Dark red muffins, about six of them, were lined up perfectly inside the box. Red velvet. You wondered if he had made them himself or if he had bought them from some expensive bakery.

“I love muffins,” you assured him and accepted the box. “Thank you, Mingyu.”

“No problem,” he said, “And, if you’re into barbecue, our other neighbor is having one later this evening.”

“Oh, I don’t know… I don’t really know them. I feel like I’d be intruding.”

“You can come over with me. I’ll keep you company all night if you don’t like them,” he joked.

“Well, that’s certainly a tempting offer…” You thought about your mom and how much she’d want you to try to move on. “Alright, when is it?”

“I’ll come by around six and pick you up,” he recommended.

“Sounds good,” you said. “See you then.” “Can’t wait.” He sent you a flirtatious smile before leaving.

You watched Mingyu leave, not so subtly checking him out, before closing the door. Walking into the kitchen, you opened up the box of muffins and were immediately hit with a velvety aroma. After putting the box on the kitchen island, you picked one of them up and tasted it. The muffin practically melted in your mouth. It was perfectly fluffy and not too sweet.

“Holy fuck.” You put your hand over your mouth. Was this man good at everything?

Not wanting to look like you’ve been in bed all day, despite definitely having done just that, you put on a blue linen dress and try to look a little put together. You don’t want to tarnish your aunt’s good name by being a messy niece. Mingyu knocked on your door at six o’clock sharp, and when you opened the door, you were met with a surprise. He had changed into white linen pants and a light blue dress shirt. You were matching.

“Hi again,” he said with a smile. “Ready to go?”

“Oh, um…” You looked back into the cottage and grabbed your bag. “Sure… should I bring something?”

“If you have something to bring.” You went into the kitchen and picked up a bottle of rosé you had brought with you. It was one of your favorite bottles. It had been chilled in the fridge, now at the perfect drinking temperature. When you walked back outside, you held up the bottle of wine for him to see. Mingyu whistled when he saw the label, and you handed it over to him to let him get a closer look.

“Nice stuff.” He held the bottle gently so that he didn’t heat it with his hands.

“You can thank-” Wonwoo. Wonwoo showed you this wine first. He said that it’d be just your taste. He wasn’t wrong, which was nice at the time, but now it made you want to scream.

“Who can I thank?” Mingyu’s question brought you out of your thoughts.

“The woman in the store,” you lied. “Let’s go.”

Your neighbor’s backyard was full of laughter. You could hear it from outside your cottage. Walking up to the blue house, you felt your heart start pounding. Mingyu opened the door for you, and you were met with a scenery that you swore you had dreamed of. Large families - grandparents, parents, children - were all gathered. They were drinking, eating, playing - and it made you want to vomit. You pressed the bottle of wine into Mingyu’s chest, and he quickly took hold of it.

“I’m sorry, I’m not feeling that well… I think I need to go home.” You backed away from the house. “Tell the host my best wishes… and that I’m sorry." Mingyu probably tried to stop you, but you wouldn’t know since you quickly turned on your heel and briskly walked away. It wasn’t safe at all. Staying here wasn’t the paradise that your mom had made it out to be.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ You packed up your things the very next day and put them in your car. It was early in the morning, the sun had barely just started rising, and yet Mingyu was out for a run. He ran past your car as you were putting the second bag in.

“Hey there, neighbor.” Even his voice was hot. You looked over at him. He was wearing shorts and a t-shirt, which was sticking to his chest from sweat. A cap was placed on his head, but you could still see his face - shiny from sweat but pretty nonetheless. Could he just look bad for one moment? Just so that it could be easier for you to resist the urge to jump him…

“You run this early in the morning?” You asked.

“Only when I’m out here,” he said. “Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, I just… I don’t think nature’s for me.” You crossed your arms over your chest.

“How would you know?” He asked.

“Excuse me?”

“You’ve been here two days, and you’ve only been indoors.” You were stumped. He was right, of course, but you desperately wanted him to be wrong. He approached you, still breathing hard. God, you wanted to climb him like a tree.

“Listen, I can see that you’ve got something going on,” he said, “And I promise you, this is the best place to be when you’re wound up. If this was meant to be therapeutic for you, then I think you need to try a little harder than what you have.”

If it weren’t for the fact that he made you weak in the knees, you would’ve just walked away from him. You stayed, and you listened… and he wasn’t wrong.

“So then, what do you suggest I do?” You secretly hoped he’d suggest that you go home with him, but life wasn’t a porno…

“Well, I don’t know your struggles.” He shrugged. “But I can show you around, make you appreciate nature.”

“... I’d like that.” “Good.” He grinned. “Do you want to meet up later? Maybe after lunch? I was thinking of going out to the lake if you want to tag along.”

“Sure.” You took out the bags from the car and carried them back inside. Mingyu’s presence beside you made you heat up. He picked up the last of the bags and helped you carry them to the door. You thanked him with a small smile, and he gave you a wink before jogging over to his cottage.

Later that day, you change into a swimsuit and put on an oversized shirt to cover up while you walk over to the lake. With a towel under your arm, you went to look for Mingyu. Footsteps quickly approached from behind you, and when you turned around, you were met with a wonderful sight. Your next-door neighbor was running towards you, wearing black swimming shorts and an open button-up with lazily rolled-up sleeves.

“Hey there, neighbor!” he said with a grin.

He reminded you of a puppy - happy and always eager. When he had jogged up to you, you noticed the silver chain around his neck. You hadn’t seen it before, but now your eyes were fixed on the delicate chain. Maybe it was because you didn’t know where else to look, or the juxtaposition of such a delicate thing on such a brawny man was appealing to you.

“Eyes up here, sweetheart,” Mingyu joked, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“Sorry, I just…” You felt heat rise to your face. “It’s a nice chain.”

“Thanks.” He didn’t look like he believed you. “Ready to go for a swim?”

Mingyu took you to a small dock, where he left his towel and his shirt before he started wading through the water. You watched his back as he walked, his muscles moving under his skin hypnotizing you. When he looked back, he sent you a wink, making your heart skip a beat. You pulled off your shirt and started treading through the cold water yourself.

“How are you not freezing?” you asked.

“I am.” He laughed. “But if I started shivering, you wouldn’t come in!”

“Touché.” You smiled and approached him. The water was up to your hips now, but your legs were slowly getting used to the cold water. You heard him gasp and looked up to see him covering his agape mouth with his hands - as if he was pleasantly surprised.

“What is it?”

“You’re smiling,” he teased. “Are you enjoying nature yet?”

“It’s growing on me,” you admitted.

“Good,” he hummed. “Try closing your eyes.” You give him a strange look but still follow his instructions. After closing your eyes, you take a deep breath. The sound of a lonely bird echoed through the forest. The rippling water murmured secrets in a language you couldn’t understand, but you listened intently anyway. Your hands were hanging by your sides, the water weaving between your fingers. The stream wasn’t strong enough to move you, but you still felt it. After another deep breath, you opened your eyes again to see Mingyu proudly looking back at you.

“It’s nice, right?”

“Very nice,” you said.

“Come on, let’s go.” He started moving up the stream. “I want to show you something.” It didn’t take long to swim to the place Mingyu wanted to show you. A waterfall, not very tall but remarkable nevertheless, was flowing in front of you. Right by the top of the waterfall hung a swing on a tough-looking branch. It looked like something out of a paradise resort.

“I built that swing when I was a teenager,” he said. “And if we’re lucky, it’s not too old to use.”

“Wait, how old are you?”

“Just turned twenty-eight,” he said. “Don’t I look like it?”

“I thought you’d be younger- we’re the same age.” You looked back at the swing. “So, how young of a teenager are we talking?”

“I was seventeen.” He sighed. “It’ll hold… probably.” Mingyu helped you up the rocks, and the two of you got to the top of the waterfall rather quickly. You sat down next to each other, your legs dangling off the edge of the waterfall. Sticking your foot into the running water, you watched it bend around your body. After resting for a bit, Mingyu stood back up.

“Want to try the swing?” he asked.

“Only if you try it first.” You chuckled as you watched the man take a shaky breath. Mingyu took hold of the old rope. When he pulled on it, the old tree let out a croak - as if it was stretching after a long nap. With furrowed brows, Mingyu carefully climbed onto the swing - and it held his weight! You laughed and clapped his hands as Mingyu let out a victorious shout. The creaking continued as Mingyu began swinging, eventually flinging himself off into the pool of water beside the bottom of the waterfall. His head went underwater, and you held your breath until he popped back up to the surface.

“It’s safe!” He shouted, and you wolf-whistled as he got up to the more shallow part of the lake. “Your turn!”

“Oh no, I’m not doing that!” “You said you would!” Mingyu pouted.

“It’s part of your nature therapy, Y/N!” You loved it when he said your name… Mingyu would be the death of you. After finally managing to get onto the swing, with Mingyu cheering you on from the side of the lake, you began swinging. You let go of the ropes and jumped, shutting your eyes tight. Water encapsulated you before you got back up to the surface. Mingyu cheered and clapped for you, to which you responded with a shy smile.

“Fun, right?”

“Maybe a little…” you admitted as you walked back up to the shallow part of the lake.

You and Mingyu swam back to the dock where you left your things, and the two of you sat down on it. Your feet were still in the water, the stream tickling the lower half of your calves. When you had dried off and the weather got a little colder, you put your shirt from before back on.

“I had a really good time today,” you said.

“You don’t feel like going home anymore?”

“Not as much.” You looked over at Mingyu, who was already looking at you. “Thank you. I needed this.”

“Let me take you out tomorrow, too, then,” he said.

“Sure.” You nodded. “But I don’t know how you’re going to top this.”

“We can go on a morning hike,” he suggested.

“Mingyu-” You chuckled. “I’m not a morning person- I don’t think it’d be better than this.”

“You say that now,” he said. “But just wait until we’re standing up on the hill watching the sunrise.”

“Sunrise? How early do I have to get up?”

“I’ll pick you up at five.”

Despite not wanting to wake up so early, you did it anyway. After a day of swimming, you fell asleep early and woke up fifteen minutes before Mingyu was to pick you up. You dragged yourself out of bed, putting on your most comfortable workout gear. For whatever reason, you trusted Mingyu enough to let him take you out on this horrible morning walk. Trying to stretch the sleep out of your body, you moved around your living room in front of the big windows. When you got up from stretching out your hamstrings, you heard a knock coming from one of the windows. You looked over with big eyes, meeting the gaze of a smiling Mingyu. He was wearing the same jogging gear he had yesterday and a backpack slung over one of his shoulders. He waved to you, and you hurried over to the door. With a flushed face, you opened the door and welcomed Mingyu inside while you put on your shoes.

“Good morning.” Mingyu stayed on your porch, giving you space.

“Morning.” You stood back up and gave him a quizzical look. “Were you watching me stretch?”

“Just for a second, I didn’t want to scare you mid-stretch,” he defended himself hurriedly. “I’m not a creep, I swear.”

You stepped outside and patted his slumped shoulders. He reminded you of a puppy again, the way he was looking at you with big eyes and a slight pout. You were beginning to enjoy teasing him. “

I know,” you said. “Ready to go?”

“Of course.”

The two of you watched the forest wake up as you walked along the path Mingyu had picked for you. It was an uphill walk, which wasn’t what you needed this early in the morning. But Mingyu promised you that it would be rewarding, so you continued walking. The two of you were mostly silent, other than when one of you pointed out something you had seen. However, the silence was welcomed. It was, as Mingyu had said, very therapeutic. Despite feeling like it took forever, you were up on the hill before you knew it. Mingyu pointed out a small bench by the edge of a cliff, and the two of you sat down. He took out the backpack and gave you a neatly wrapped sandwich, along with a thermos of coffee. As the two of you ate breakfast, the sky started turning pink, and the sun started rising from behind the horizon.

“Wow,” you hummed.

“It’s good, isn’t it?” Mingyu nudged you with his elbow.

“It’s amazing…”

The both of you sat in silence for a bit more, but something started itching to come out from the back of your throat. Mingyu was playing with the paper wrapping from his now-eaten sandwich.

“So… why did you come out here in the first place?” Mingyu asked.

“It’s a long story…” You said, thinking he would put it to rest - even though a part of you wanted to tell someone about it.

“You can tell me, you know?” he said. “I won’t judge.”

So you did. You told him about Wonwoo, how suddenly the relationship had ended, and why it had turned out the way he did. You told him about Gyeong Hui and how you couldn’t even bring yourself to hate her despite what had happened. After that, you sat in silence. You thought he wouldn’t want to talk to you after this, but instead, he put a comforting arm around your shoulder.

“You’re strong.” His words made you scoff. “I’m serious. That’s more than enough for any other person just to give up, but you’re here. You’re trying.”

“Just because you made me.”

“I can’t make you do anything that you don’t want to do,” he said. “You could’ve left.” His words linger in the air. You could have left, why didn’t you? Was it just because you thought your neighbor was hot, or did his words reach you? Did it even matter? You were here now, feeling better than you had since the incident. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, leaning your head in the palms of your hands. Mingyu took his arm off you and let you be. You missed the warmth of his arm but appreciated the space he gave you.

“Well, thanks for bringing me out here,” you said.

“You’re helping me too. Now I have a reason to get out more.” He leaned back.

There was more to his story. You could tell by the tone of his voice, but you decided not to pry. If he wanted to tell you, he would. You looked out over the forest again. The sun had risen far above the trees now. When you leaned back on the bench, you noticed that Mingyu’s arm was leaning on the back of the bench. In a moment of hope and rashness, you leaned your head on his shoulder. You glanced up at Mingyu, seeing him smile before he wrapped his arm around your shoulders again.

“I don’t think I’ve ever watched the sunrise like this before,” you said.

“Really?”

“I’m not a morning person,” you reminded him. Mingyu chuckled, his chest rumbling as he did. You closed your eyes, taking another deep breath. This time it didn’t just smell like fresh air and dewy grass. You could smell his cologne as well. It was faint, but you could sense the woody smell of men’s perfume. You could probably fall asleep right there in his arms.

“We still have to walk back.” Mingyu made you open your eyes again. “Don’t fall asleep on me.”

“It's not my fault that you’re comfortable…” You sighed. Mingyu moved around, forcing you to get up despite your many protests. He helped you up, and the two of you began making your way home.

You kept seeing Mingyu for the first week of your stay, and towards the end of it, he offered to make you dinner. The two of you spent your time outdoors, hiking or going to the lake, so spending the evening making dinner in your small kitchen was more intimate than you were used to. However, you gladly accepted his offer - you hadn’t exactly been eating like royalty during your stay here. Cooking took effort, which you didn’t have the energy for. Seeing as the muffins Mingyu had given you the first time you met were delicious, it wouldn’t surprise you if his cooking was delicious as well. Mingyu came over with a bag of groceries that he immediately put in the kitchen. You were placed on watch duty - which was Mingyu’s way of saying, “Sit on the counter and don’t touch anything while I work,” and you couldn’t complain. You watched as he expertly cut up the vegetables and the meat, enjoying the view of his hands getting to work. His t-shirt sleeves were rolled up, showing off his biceps as he reached for plates and glasses. From time to time, he’d look over at you to see if you were watching - smiling when he caught you ogling at him. He took pride in his good looks, as he should.

“Is there anything you can’t do?” You said. “I mean this- and the muffins?”

“Oh, I didn’t bake those-” He chuckled. “I can’t bake, that’s for sure… I bought them from this little café that’s not too far from here. I’ll take you some time.”

“Sounds good.” You smiled at the implication that he wanted to keep seeing you, even though he had asked you to do things with him countless times before.

“Still, you’re still a natural talent at most things.”

“I can’t paint either,” he argued. “Paint?”

“I’m supposed to paint the living room in the cottage- my parents wanted it to be a lighter color,” he explained. “I’ve been putting it off for so long, but now all the furniture I’ve put away has started to bug me.”

“Tell you what…” You hopped off the counter you were sitting on and walked up next to him. “If this meal is as delicious as it smells, I’ll help you paint tomorrow. As a thank you for the meal.”

“Deal.” He grinned. “I’ll take it as a challenge.” He moved you aside so that he could get to the spices. His hands were only on your waist for a millisecond, but your skin was burning at his touch. While trying to contain your smile, you took your place on the counter once again.

The dinner was perfect, as expected. The food, the wine, the company… everything was to your liking. And when everything was over, you got to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Mingyu by the sink. He was washing the dishes, and you were drying them.

“I hate that this place doesn’t have a dishwasher,” you groaned.

“Doing dishes can be nice…” Mingyu said. “Given that you’re in good company.” Mingyu handed you a plate, and your fingers brushed against each other. Every time he touched you it sent sparks flying in your chest. You took the plate and started drying it. There were no other dishes in the sink, and Mingyu put his hands on it while he was waiting for you to finish.

“Well, I’m glad I can be good company,” you replied.

“You’ve been good company this entire week,” Mingyu admitted. “Although you have distracted me from what I was supposed to be doing.”

“I think that’s fair,” you argued. “You’re the one who convinced me to say, after all.” You put away the last plate and dried off your hands, giving Mingyu a fresh towel for his own hands.

Shamelessly, you stared at his hands while he dried them off with the towel. When you looked back up at his eyes, you knew that he had caught you. You didn’t mind - maybe it was the amount of wine you had consumed, or you had grown comfortable around your neighbor - and took the towel off his hands when he didn’t need it anymore, putting it on the counter beside you.

“I guess you’re right.” Mingyu watched you carefully as you walked past him to wipe off the other side of the counter. “I’m glad I did.”

“I’m glad you did too.” Mingyu encaged you against the counter, putting his hands on the wood on either side of you. His chest was pressed up against your back. His head leaned down by your ear - you could feel his breath fanning against you. You turned around, locking eyes with him again. The air was thick, and you needed to do something to stop the pounding in your chest. Your hands moved on their own when they moved across his chest, traveling up his neck and settling in his short hair. Mingyu glanced down at your lips and leaned in until your noses were touching.

“Mingyu…” you breathed out. “Kiss me.” At your command, he finally put his lips on yours. They were soft but slightly chapped, and they moved in harmony with yours. His hands went from the counter to your hips and to your hips to hoist you up. The kiss broke for a moment so that Mingyu could put you on the counter. Standing between your legs, Mingyu connected his lips with yours again. You cupped his face in your hands, trying to pull him impossibly close as the kiss got heated. The two of you only stopped to catch your breath, leaning your foreheads against each other.

“I’m not dreaming, am I?” Mingyu asked breathlessly.

“I hope not…” You connected your lips again. Mingyu took his time with you, lips moving slowly and passionately. You hadn’t felt like this in what felt like forever. To be intimate with someone again… it made you feel alive. Despite your head spinning, you couldn’t help but think about Wonwoo. You pulled away, Mingyu trying to chase after your lips before noticing something was wrong.

“I’m sorry…” you whispered as soon as you saw his worried eyes.

“No, no- it’s okay, Y/N,” he assured you. “It was too fast, I understand.”

“It’s just been so long-”

“I get it, sweetheart. Trust me.” The nickname, even in this situation, made your heart skip a beat. You caressed his cheek, brushing your thumb over his cheekbone. He sent you a warm smile, unlike the charming and flirtatious ones you had seen before.

“Are you sure it’s okay?”

“I don’t want to kiss someone who doesn’t want to be kissed,” he said. “There’s always next time, hm?”

“Next time,” you promised. Mingyu helped you off the counter, and you walked him to the front door. As he put on his shoes, you felt your chest grow empty. You knew that you didn’t want to go further right now, not when your mind was racing, but you wanted him so badly. Mingyu stood back up and took your hand.

“Don’t feel bad, okay?” He squeezed your hand. “I liked it while it lasted.” You looked down at your shoes, unable to keep his gaze.

“Are you still helping me paint tomorrow?” he asked and squeezed your hand again.

“Of course.” You looked back up at him for a second to give him a secure smile. “Goodnight, Mingyu.”

“Goodnight, sweetheart.” He let go of your hand and opened the door.

As soon as he closed the door behind him, you crumbled to the floor. There was a part of you that believed that you had ruined this now. A black hole was growing in your chest. You liked Mingyu, but you still couldn’t get the image of Wonwoo out of your brain. Maybe this was your life now, finding new people but being cock-blocked by someone who wasn’t even in the room… someone who didn’t care about you anymore. If he had been able to move on, why couldn’t you? It had been a year since you took off your wedding ring and signed the divorce papers. It had been half a year since Wonwoo last called. You had deleted his contact from your phone, afraid that you would give in and call him on a whim. You couldn’t sink so low. There was nothing more to do than accept that you had been the other woman. If alternate dimensions existed, you wished that at least one of them let you stay with Wonwoo - or that the plan could’ve gone through. you wished that you never got to know that Gyeong Hui was a kind and gentle woman. You wished that she would’ve been a bitch… but she wasn’t. You had no reason to hate her - she didn’t drag your husband away from you. She was just a pawn in a game. You got up from the floor and made your way to your bedroom.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ The next day, you went over to Mingyu’s cottage in clothes that you weren’t afraid to get paint on. You couldn’t let what happened yesterday ruin what you had going on with Mingyu. So, despite your legs wanting to run the other way, you walked in through the open door to the cottage.

“Hello?” You called from the hallway.

“In here!” Mingyu shouted, and you followed his voice.

The inside of the house was similar to your aunt’s, although it was more classically decorated. When you found Mingyu, he was standing in the middle of a large room with no furniture. The furniture stood outside the room, cramped in a large portion of the corner of another room. The otherwise big brawny man looked tiny in the empty room. Mingyu had already started painting, as evident by the paint stains on his clothes.

“The paint is supposed to go on the walls, you know.” You leaned against the doorframe.

“Very funny…” He turned around to face you to show you a big splotch of paint on his face, trying to hide his smile by biting his lower lip. “I got paint on my face when opening the can… the rest is just brush accidents…”

You approached him and cooed as he pouted, cupping his cheeks in your palms. With your thumb, you tried to wipe off some of the paint on his face, but it was already dry.

“Help?” he murmured.

“Hand me a paint roller, Picasso,” you joked, and Mingyu grimaced.

The work got done quicker than expected. It was hard, and the room was warm despite the many open windows and doors, and it had you sweating buckets. The fact that you kept thinking about last night - his lips on yours - didn’t help. You desperately needed an ice bath.

“Do you think we’re done?” You asked as the two of you looked around the freshly painted room.

“I think so. Now we just have to clean up,” Mingyu said. He was looking at the many newspapers on the floor, protecting them from white paint, but you were still only staring at him. Any sentimental thought you had the day before had flown through the window. You were too hot, too tired, and too turned on to think about anything other than Mingyu. His shirt was sticking to his toned chest, leaving little to the imagination - not that you hadn’t already seen him half-naked.

“Y/N, are you okay? Do you need a glass of water?” he asked out of innocent concern.

“I’m just tired,” you lied.

“Are you sure? You look flushed.” He approached you, and you had to stop yourself from backing up against the wet wall. Mingyu managed to walk up right next to you and put the back of his hand against your forehead. It was colder than your skin, and you leaned into his touch. Your eyes closed, a soft sigh escaping your lips. It wasn’t the heat- it was Mingyu making you melt. Much to your dismay, he took his hand away from your face.

“Are you sure you’re okay there, sweetheart?” he asked with a small smile.

“You know what… I was going to act like nothing happened yesterday, but I need us to resume whatever we were doing back then right now.” You looked him dead in the eye.

“But I don’t want to push you-”

“You’re not pushing me…” You took a deep breath. “Please?”

You didn’t have to say another word before his lips were on yours again. The messy room was left to its own devices as Mingyu led you through the house - only breaking from the kiss to make sure he wasn’t running into anything. Clothes were flying off of you and onto any nearby surface. He picked you up, your legs swinging around his waist, and carried you upstairs to his bed. Falling against the plush bed, you let out a happy shout before Mingyu crawled towards you again. When your lips connected again, your head was buzzing. You were both only in your underwear by now, your sweaty bodies rubbing up against each other. Mingyu pulled away from you with a soft groan, his eyes still shut as he began grinding against you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Mingyu nuzzled his face into your neck, leaving chaste kisses on the sensitive skin. When you finally broke out in laughter, Mingyu came back up to look at you. You covered your face with your hands to hide from him - suddenly feeling shy.

“Hey, pretty,” he said and tried to remove your hands. “I want to look at you… come on…”

“I haven’t… the last time I did this was with him,” you said, knowing that he would understand who you were talking about. “I know it’s silly, but it feels strange.”

“It’s not silly.” He chuckled and finally managed to remove your hands. “It’s normal, but I want you to forget all that and just focus on us.”

The light coming in from the window gave away that the sun had started to set - its golden glow coloring Mingyu’s skin with a beautiful shine. Your hand caressed his cheek, and he leaned into your touch.

“Just us,” you repeated. “... could you get a condom?”

Suddenly, Mingyu’s peaceful expression turned into an annoyed one. He scrunched up his face and let out a groan, his head leaning back into the crook of your neck.

“I don’t have condoms,” he mumbled. The entire situation made you laugh, and it only made Mingyu whine louder. If it weren’t for how hard you could feel that he was, you would’ve kept laughing - but instead, you cooed at him. Your fingers ran through his hair as he buried his face in your chest. While accidental pregnancy was unlikely for you, you didn’t want to have unprotected sex with a man that you had only met a week ago.

“It’s alright, we can…” You sighed. “We can do that next time and fix your issue another way this time.”

“So there’ll be a next time?” Mingyu raised his head to meet your gaze. Your face grew hot as your smile widened. His eyes were big and hopeful, and you let out a laugh in disbelief at how he could be so adorable.

“Maybe…” you hummed.

“And you don’t want to stop now?”

“Just the opposite, please.”

Mingyu pressed a sweet peck to your lips before he went back in to devour you. You wrapped one of your legs around his waist, using it to flip the two of you around. He let out a grunt when his back hit the bed. Your lips parted, only for you to kiss down his neck to his chest. Mingyu’s chest was heaving, but you could feel his breath hitch when your lips ghosted over his skin. You settled between his legs, playing with the hem of his underwear.

“Is this okay?” You asked.

“Please.” Mingyu’s voice was hoarse as he begged for you. Pulling down the band of his underwear, you watched in awe as his thick cock slapped onto his abdomen. It shouldn’t be surprising that he was as big as he was, considering his height, but it still left your jaw slack. After ripping off his underwear, you put your hand over his cock - gently stroking it before you wrapped your hand around it and put it in your mouth. Bobbing your head up and down his length, you tried to take more and more of him.

“Fuck…” He gasped and reached his hand up to your head. “... can I?”

You let out a delighted hum and moaned around him when he grabbed your hair to push you further down. Gagging around his cock made Mingyu get louder - his moans echoing around the room. Your nails clawed at his thighs as your eyes welled up with tears. Peering up at him through your lashes, you saw Mingyu throwing his head back with his eyes shut tight. His hips moved on their own, shallowly thrusting his cock up your throat. You put your hands on his hips, holding them down, and got your mouth off of him, gasping for air.

“Shit- are you okay?” he asked with heavy breaths. “Did I hurt you?”

Seeing him all fucked out, his pupils blown out of proportion, and his lips slightly parted made you clench around nothing. You kept stroking his cock, forcing more heavenly noises to come out from behind Mingyu’s lips.

“I’m okay, baby,” you said. “Are you getting close?”

“Yeah- fuck, yes,” he whined. “Don’t stop, baby-”

You replaced your hand with your mouth, keeping the same speed and rhythm as you had before. He warned you that he was about to cum, but you didn’t stop. You watched his hands grip the sheets of the bed, throwing his head back against the pillow again. With a guttural moan, Mingyu came down your throat. You took your mouth off him, letting him ride out his high with your hand around his cock.

“Thank you, sweetheart…” Mingyu’s hips stuttered before his body went completely limp. A big grin was painted on your face as you crawled up his body. Mingyu’s eyes were full of lust as he reached for you. His strong arms wrapped around you, keeping you locked by his side. You pressed a few kisses on his jaw, making him whine.

“You keep surprising me, Mingyu,” you murmured against his skin.

“Good surprises, right?”

“All good,” you assured him. Mingyu’s grip around you tightened, and he flipped the two of you around again. Laying under him again, you finally noticed the small silver chain around his neck again. It was dangling right in front of you, and you couldn’t resist the urge to reach up and pull on it. Pulling on the chain brought him down so that his forehead was leaning against yours again. He smiled, pressing a sweet peck to the tip of your nose. Your face crinkled at the feeling, making Mingyu giggle. He giggled.

“You’re a big softie, aren’t you?” You grinned.

“Only on special occasions,” he said. Copying your actions from before, Mingyu pressed kisses down your neck to your chest. As you arched your back, he helped you take off your bra.

“You’re fucking gorgeous.” Mingyu kissed the delicate skin before moving down to your panties. “Want me to repay the favor?”

“Please?” At your quiet plea, he ripped off your panties. A yelp escaped your lips as he lifted your legs to rest on top of his shoulders. His lips ghosted over the inside of your thigh, sending a shiver down your spine as he got closer to your core. As he laid his tongue flat against your cunt, you let out a loud moan that you had tried to bite back. You could feel him smile against you before he went into lap at your clit. Sinful noises bounced off the walls of Mingyu’s bedroom. Your hands were in his hair, pulling at it whenever he found a spot that made you see stars. Mingyu was the kind of person who was always up for a challenge - and when he had gotten the first taste of victory, he couldn’t get enough.

“Don’t stop!” You practically shouted, forgetting that you still had neighbors even if you were in the middle of nowhere. Mingyu’s grip on your thighs tightened, making sure that you couldn’t help his relentless attack on your pussy. His tongue was inside you now, his nose bumping against your clit. You were practically riding his face with the way you were grinding against him. And when you felt your orgasm approaching, your hips stuttered. Mingyu, hearing the sound of your voice changing, picked up on the fact that you were close. With a steady pace, he guided you through your orgasm, letting you rock against him for as long as you needed.

Your body was spent afterward. You were almost completely unable to move. Mingyu crawled up next to you, maneuvering both of you to lay comfortably under the covers. He was lying beside you, and you had your head on his chest - you could hear that his heartbeat was finally starting to calm down.

“So…” He trailed off. “Yeah.”

You breathed out. The two of you lay there in silence. Despite just having shared a very intimate moment, there wasn’t anything to say. You listened to his breathing, finding the rhythm calming enough to fall asleep to. Your eyes were closed, and you were almost about to drift away to sleep when Mingyu’s soft voice brought you back to reality.

“Do you need anything?” he muttered.

“… maybe I should go to the bathroom.” You nodded and sat up. “You… it was… nice.” You stared at each other for a while before breaking out into awkward laughter. Even though you had been so confident with him earlier, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it again now. Something had changed between you - it was neither bad nor good, just natural. You pulled the sheets up to cover your chest - suddenly feeling vulnerable, despite already having shown him everything.

“Do you want me to get you a shirt or something?” He asked, noticing your change in demeanor. You hummed in response. Mingyu got up and walked over to his closer, and you tried not to stare at his naked figure. When he found a shirt for you to wear and clothes for himself, he walked back over to the bed and handed it to you. You pulled the shirt over your head, his scent surrounding you. His laundry detergent smelled fancy, and there was the slightest hint of the cologne that you had sensed during your hike.

“Thanks.” You got up and went to his bathroom.

“Y/N,” he said before you could go inside. “Do you want to stay over for dinner?” You turned around to face him, again trying your hardest to look only at his eyes. His hair was a mess, thanks to you, and he looked genuinely happy - a gentle smile playing on his lips and eyes that conveyed the same emotion. How could you say no to him? Especially since you had already tried his cooking once, you wouldn’t give up that opportunity.

“… sure.” You nodded and went into the bathroom.

After that evening, you continued this relationship - sleeping with each other, making food for one another, and spending as much time together as possible. You felt safe in Mingyu’s arms. Whenever he touched you, even if it was just a hand on your knee or cuddling while watching TV on the couch, you’d melt into it - trying to get as much out of it as possible. Slowly, you began recharging. It was as if you had been in hibernation this entire time, and spring had finally come to welcome you back to the world. Mingyu was your spring: warm, bright, and sweet. Between the two of you, something blossomed over the last week of your stay in the cottage.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ It was the last day of your stay at your aunt's cottage. Your things were neatly packed up, except for one dress, the dress that you had worn to the barbecue that you hadn’t gotten to enjoy. To reclaim the ruined evening, you and Mingyu had decided to dress up the way you had that day and hold your barbecue in Mingyu’s backyard. When you approached his gate that evening, you could already hear people laughing and talking in the backyard. An invisible wall stopped you from going any further. You stood completely still and fidgeted with your dress. Despite it being different from the first time, it still felt the same. However, you had promised Mingyu to come - and all of his hard work would go to waste if you didn’t walk through that gate. It was just a small metallic gate, painted in black and surrounded by a hedge. You swallowed whatever nerves were keeping you from going inside and opened the gate. Walking around the corner of the house, you were met with your neighbors in Mingyu’s backyard. As soon as you saw him, your worries melted away. Seeing that he had followed your plan to match outfits made you smile. Mingyu was standing by the grill with his back towards you but turned around as soon as he heard the gate close. You waved to him, and he motioned for you to come over. Standing next to him made it easier for him to wrap his arm around your waist.

“Welcome, sweetheart,” he said quietly, as if he wanted to make sure that no one else heard. “How are you doing?”

“I’m doing good,” you hummed. “Do I look okay?”

Mingyu looked at you up and down, drinking in your appearance, and pulled a grimace that screamed.

“Are you kidding?” He pulled you in a little closer and leaned down to whisper in your ear. “Trust me; if it weren’t for the amount of people here, I’d take you right on-” You playfully smacked his arm before he could finish his sentence. Seeing your shy smile, Mingyu puffed out his chest with pride - biting back his smile.

“You look perfect,” he said.

“So do you,” you replied, making the man’s ear turn red.

At the end of the evening, you were the last guest in Mingyu’s cottage. Just like you had every other night, you were standing beside Mingyu doing the dishes. Lucky for him, he had a dishwasher, but the two of you still had to wash the things that couldn’t go in there. You were drying and putting dishes away while Mingyu was washing them. The both of you worked in comfortable silence, but you were itching to say something.

“Tonight was great,” you expressed.

“I’m glad you thought so, sweetheart.” Mingyu dried off his hands on a towel after he had handed you the last of the dishes. “You’re leaving tomorrow morning, aren’t you?”

“I am.” You sighed. “And you’re staying?”

“Just a few more days… I still haven’t finished moving all the furniture, thanks to you.” He nudged your side. “You should take responsibility for your actions.”

You scoffed and put away the dry dishes. Mingyu was silent for a while, which garnered your attention. You turned around to see him leaning against the kitchen island, looking at you wistfully. A strong urge to walk over to him, hold him, and tell him everything would be okay, rushed over you, but you stood still in your place by the kitchen counter.

“I’ll be lonely without you,” Mingyu admitted. You didn’t answer - you didn’t know what to say to that. Instead, you approached him and wrapped your arms around his neck. Mingyu moved on autopilot, wrapping his arms around your waist and nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. You relaxed against his touch, letting out a breath that you didn’t know you had been holding in. Breaking the soft moment, Mingyu started leaving kisses along your neck and clavicle.

“What are you doing?” You let out a giggle at the ticklish feeling of his lips.

“Giving you a final going-away-present,” he muttered. His ticklish kisses turned into something that’d most definitely leave marks the next day. You let out a gasp as he found a sensitive spot right by your ear. With one of your hands, you moved Mingyu’s face so that you could look him in the eye. There was still a sad look in his eyes, but they were slowly being replaced by something more lustful.

“Bedroom?” You asked. Without another word, Mingyu picked you up and carried you to his bedroom.

You found yourself lost in him again. Mingyu was everywhere: his taste, his smell, his touch surrounding you and infecting your brain. Your bodies moved against each other slowly, letting out low grunts and subdued moans. He was leaning above you, and your legs were wrapped around his waist. The slow pace would have usually been almost painful, but now you never wanted it to stop. You needed it to be slow, take as long as it needed to, so you didn’t ask him to go any faster. Mingyu reached out for your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours, shutting his eyes tight as his lips parted to let out a string of curses.

“You okay?” You asked with a chuckle.

“I’m okay.” He took a shaky breath. “Just hold my hand…”

“I’m not letting go, baby,” you promised. His head fell into the crook of your neck, and Mingyu let out another moan. You laughed at his reaction, finding it sweet how much you affected him. Your laugh got cut off by a moan when Mingyu began thrusting harsher into you - still not faster, just harder. He left wet kisses along your clavicle, whining against your skin. The two of you had been doing this for what felt like forever, and the stimulation was taking over him.

“You feel so fucking good,” he moaned.

One thing about Mingyu, when you got him going it was hard to stop him. You knew that he had been close to cumming several times already, and each time he had found a reason to pause. He had been edging himself for possibly an hour or more, and by now, his brain was fried. You took his face in your hands, bringing him up to look you in the eye and cooing at his clouded expression. It wasn’t like you weren’t drunk on lust too, but Mingyu was way further gone than you. Now that you had him like this, mindlessly thrusting into you, you knew he wouldn’t stop until you were cumming all over his cock. You almost felt bad for him. He needed someone to take care of him- he needed you to take care of him.

“Do you want to cum with me, baby?” You asked quietly between moans. Mingyu nodded, putting his head back in the crook of your neck. With the hand that wasn’t holding yours, Mingyu brought his hand between your bodies to rub your swollen clit. Your jaw went slack, wanton moans escaping you without a single care for who heard. Mingyu’s thrusts grew quicker, chasing both his own and your high. As your orgasm came rippling over you, dissolving you into pleasure, Mingyu came as well. He chased his breath between every other moan. His voice strained from how much he had been using it. Your hands played with his hair as he continued subtly grinding against you until his body fell limp against you.

You fell asleep holding Mingyu but woke up with his back turned against you. Without realizing that you were doing it, you had reached out to touch the skin where his neck met his shoulders. Your fingertips followed the crevices and curves of his form, your eyes following them - studying him. No matter how many times you looked at him, you always found new things. A mole here, a wrinkle there - everything felt sacred to you like you had discovered something important each time just because they were a part of him. You could look at him like this all day. A feeling started blooming in your chest, a feeling that you didn’t want to acknowledge or ever think of again. Mingyu stirred in his sleep, making you pull away your hand from him. The truth was that you were falling for him. Every time you kissed him, it just felt right, but you still felt the need to try it over and over again - just to see if it was real. He made you nervous in the best of ways. He made you laugh until you cried. More importantly, he made you feel loved. This feeling reminded you too much of Wonwoo, and you had to leave. Your things were already packed in the back of your car, you had never given him your phone number, and there was no way he could ever meet you again. Despite ignoring it for as long as you could, you knew that this was how it had to end. You recognized this path all too well, and you couldn’t be the other woman for a second time. As you kissed Mingyu's shoulder, you whispered out

“Goodbye” - and you left without a trace. When you got home to your mom’s apartment that afternoon, it was empty. Your mother’s absence didn’t stop you. There was no going back now. You had to build yourself up again. The traveling bags stayed in your car, and you started looking for apartments right away.

You had money saved up already, but after you had managed to sell your old apartment, you had enough money to move overseas if you wanted to. Nevertheless, you settled for a small apartment in a good neighborhood. It was smaller than your last apartment but had beautiful, big windows. There was one bedroom, a kitchen attached to a smaller living room, and a gorgeous bathroom. It was more than you could ask for. The money you had gotten from selling the apartment wouldn’t last forever, of course - you had to get a job. Despite wanting to escape your old life, you didn’t want to give up every aspect of it. You managed to find a job at a prestigious primary school situated near your apartment. You had contacts there through charities that you had helped Wonwoo set up - he proved to be of help for something, after all. It wouldn’t be like teaching kindergarten, but you were up for the challenge. Everything was going your way; you had your apartment, you had a pretty good job, and you had made it all on your own. Maybe it was destiny. What if the whole thing with your ex-husband was meant to be? So that you could be independent so that you could be happy. However, there was no way you could deny the fact that you missed Mingyu. You felt bad for what you did, and you’d never really forget him, but you couldn’t get the possibility of heartbreak out of your brain around him.

You spend a year like this, living each day without thinking about what might happen in the future. Every morning you wake up around six am. you got up, made a quick breakfast, got in the shower for a few minutes before getting dressed, and finally left for work. The primary school you worked at was close enough for you to walk to, and you had grown to enjoy your daily stroll - especially on a sunny spring day like this. However, it all was ruined when you heard someone call your name. Turning around to see who it was, you were met with Wonwoo walking out of a café. He was with other people in suits, but they let him be as he excused himself. You were frozen in your place. You could only watch as he walked towards you. He looked tired, new-parent-tired, but otherwise, he looked the same.

“Y/N?”

“Hi, Wonwoo.” You sent him a tight-lipped smile.

“I haven’t seen you in so long- how have you been?” He looked apologetic but smiled nevertheless.

“I’m good,” you replied. “I got a job at a primary school near here… Everglade Primary School.”

“Oh really?” He gave you an impressed nod. “It’s quite prestigious, isn’t it?”

“A little. The kids are great.” You nodded. “... how have you been? Is everything alright with Gyeong Hui?” You were secretly hoping that everything was horrible for him, and as the thought struck you, you got a dreadful feeling in your stomach.

“Oh, uhm… she’s great. We’re actually… we’re expecting again,” he said quietly as if the words would break you if they were too loud. “It’s been difficult… our daughter just started walking, and we’re trying to handle her while simultaneously handling the pregnancy… It's a lot.”

“I could imagine.” You nodded. “Do you… do you have any pictures?” Wonwoo pulled out his phone and showed you his lock screen. A small babe in pink overalls. She was adorable. Her large eyes looked just like Wonwoo’s.

“She has your eyes.” You said as he put his phone back in his pocket.

“A lot of people say that.” He tried to hold back his proud smile. He was happy. You should be happy for him, but all you felt was a pit growing in your stomach. “I wanted to apologize, Y/N.”

“Apologize?”

“For how everything turned out, I mean…” He looked down at his shoes. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright-” The embarrassment heating your face made you speak without thinking first. “I’m seeing someone new.”

“Really?” Wonwoo raised his eyebrows as he looked back at you. “Good. I’m happy for you. So, who’s the lucky guy?” Did he have to be so perfect? Here he was, feeling happy for you when you couldn’t bring yourself to do the same. The lies came bubbling up your throat again before you could stop them.

“His name is Mingyu,” you said. “We met last year.”

“Well, I hope it works out for you.” He smiled. “And that I get to meet this Mingyu sometime.”

“Of course.” You nodded. “Listen… I have to get to my students… but it was good to see you again!”

The two of you said goodbye and went your separate ways. You had no idea why you had decided to lie. Maybe it was because he was doing so well- you just wanted to make sure that he didn’t think you were alone and sad… although you were alone and sad. There was a very big chance that you would never meet him again, which would mean that you wouldn’t have to show him your “new boyfriend”. It was a harmless lie… hopefully. The lie had made you think of Mingyu again and how it would’ve been if you had waited for him to wake up that morning. Maybe he would’ve turned around and hugged you close, making some comment about how he forgot to close the blinds the night before. Then you would’ve had breakfast together, and before you left to go home, he would’ve asked for your number. Maybe you’d be living with him in an apartment now, just the two of you in a cozy condo. You couldn’t keep thinking like this. It’d just ruin you. So you shook off the lonely feeling and put on a smile for your morning class.

The rest of your day went on normally, teaching your second-grade class and also starting to teach the third-grade class. Their old teacher had fallen ill, taking an indefinite break, and you had offered to take over. It meant that you had more work to do, but you didn’t mind. You spent the day helping them with spelling and reading, and towards the end of the day, you let them do arts and crafts while they waited for their caretakers to pick them up. The school had a system where you needed to check off the caretakers who came and picked the kids up, which allowed you to talk with all of the kids’ grown-ups. Usually, you would chat with the caretakers of each kid while they got ready to leave. For some reason, it had become your favorite part of the day - except when the parents were rude, of course. There were only two kids left in your classroom now; the twins Kim Jiu and Ari. They were sweet kids, Jiu slightly shyer than her sister. There were three names on the list beside theirs; their grandparents and their father. From the history, you could see that their grandparents were usually the ones to pick them up. However, they always seemed to be on time. You sat down next to the girls, the two of them still drawing and unbothered by the time they had spent there.

“Hey, girls,” you said, getting their attention for a second before they returned to their drawings. “Do you remember if your grandparents told you that they’d be late today?”

“Our dad is picking us up,” Ari said.

“Is he always a bit late?” you asked, and Ari nodded.

“He works a lot,” Jiu said. She was focused on her drawing. It was a yellow house with green vines growing on it. You looked over her shoulder, finding the house oddly familiar. She mumbled that it was her grandparents' house in the woods. Before you could ask her more questions, the doors to your classroom opened. You recognized his voice before you even had to look at him.

“Sorry, I’m late, girls!” Frozen in fear, you wondered how your past might have snuck up on you twice today. When you finally turned your head to look at the girls’ dad, you saw Mingyu. He was wearing a suit, his hair slightly longer than the last time you had seen him, and his eyes were big with shock.

“Daddy!” Jiu shouted as she ran up to hug her dad’s leg. Mingyu looked away from you to crouch down to hug his daughters, both Ari and Jiu engulfing him. You watched as the girls rambled on about their day. Glancing back at your list, you looked at the father’s name: Kim Mingyu. Maybe you should have known. With a deep breath, you mustered up the courage to walk up to them. Mingyu stood up to greet you.

“They’ve behaved well, I hope,” he said. You knew he recognized you, you could see it in his eyes, but you understood why he couldn’t say anything in front of the twins.

“Oh, they’ve been wonderful. They’ve been welcoming,” you said. “It’s my first day teaching their class.”

“I saw the email.” He nodded and looked down at the girls. “I told them to be on their best behavior.”

“Well, thank you.” You clasped your hands in front of you.

“Are you busy right now?”

“Uhm… no.”

“Could you… follow me out to the car? I have to talk to you.”

Of course, you usually don't follow people out to their cars… but this wasn’t any other parent. You nodded and followed them outside. You recognized his car as the one you had seen standing outside his cottage. Mingyu got his girls into their car seats and closed the doors, making sure they couldn’t hear anything. He turned to you, unable to look you in the eyes at first. Your heart was already beating a mile per minute, but it only quickened when Mingyu met your gaze.

“You left to become a primary school teacher?” He asked, somewhat jokingly.

“I was already a teacher before I met you,” you explained. “And I left because I knew I couldn’t commit to you- which was maybe for the best, seeing as you have kids. Were you married all this time?”

“I’m widowed,” he said calmly. “Their mother died in childbirth.” Your worries melted away. You hadn’t been the other woman again. The worry was replaced with embarrassment and sorrow for both the man in front of you and his kids. How could this day keep getting worse?

“I’m sorry-”

“It’s fine,” he interrupted. “You didn’t know… and I should’ve told you about Jiu and Ari- I was going to eventually.” There was a pause. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife. Mingyu reached for your hand, but you quickly stepped away.

“Your kids are in the car,” you said. “We shouldn’t be discussing this here.”

Mingyu reached for his pocket, pulling out a silver rectangle box. It was thin, and when he opened it you could see it was filled with a few cards. He picked one of them up and handed it to you. Kim Mingyu, CEO. His number and the name of his company stood under it in the same black font.

“I want to talk to you again.” He put the box back in his pocket. “Please, call me.”

You accepted the card, studying the letters before looking back at the man in front of you. He wore the same wistful smile he had that last evening in his kitchen. You had never wanted to kiss someone this badly.

“You should go,” you whispered.

“I know,” he murmured. “For what it’s worth… I’m glad I got to see you again.” Unable to say anything, afraid that the tears would come pouring out if you did, you simply nodded. You watched him get in the car before leaving to go back to your classroom.

When you got home that evening, you didn’t know whether you should cry or shout out of happiness. All of these random occurrences made you believe in destiny. To celebrate, you took a hot shower and made yourself a gourmet dinner in the form of your favorite instant ramen, only to sit down on the couch to watch some bad show on Netflix. The card Mingyu gave you sat on the coffee table, distracting you from the movie you had picked. You picked it up and turned it around - fiddling and playing around with it. A sigh escaped your lips, and, with a lot of effort, you sat up and paused the movie. Dialing the number on the card, your thumb rested over the call button. If you didn’t call, he’d just show up to pick up his kids the next day - and that’d be more awkward than a simple phone call. You pressed the green button and put the phone next to your ear, bringing your knees up to your chest. It rang three times before he picked up.

“Hello, this is Kim Mingyu.” He sounded irritated.

“Hi, it’s Y/N… is this a bad time?”

“Oh, Y/N.” His voice immediately changed when he heard who it was. “Sorry, I thought you were someone else… how are you?”

“I’m good…” You took a deep breath. “Are you?”

“I’m fine, sweetheart.” The name slipped out of his lips naturally and causally, but it made your heart flip in your chest. “I just put the kids to bed, so we should have some time to talk.”

“Mingyu…” You cringed at the shake in your voice. “I’m sorry for walking out on you.”

“I understand- you had your reasons,” he said. “I’m sorry for not telling you about the kids.”

“We didn’t talk much, did we?” Mingyu’s laughter was like heaven to your ears, even if it was short and quiet. The tension in your shoulders started fading away.

“You’re right,” he said. “We should meet up sometime. Talk things through.”

“We definitely should…” You bit your bottom lip to try to contain your happiness. “Maybe for coffee?”

“A public space sounds smart.” Mingyu chuckled. “I’ll look at my schedule… I’ve been pretty busy lately.”

“Is that why your parents have been picking up the twins?” you asked without thinking.

“It is,” he admitted. “I try to do it as much as I can… it’s just hard being a single dad.”

“If it helps, your girls seem to think the world of you,” you said, remembering the way their faces had lit up when he walked into the classroom.

“Thanks, Y/N.” You could hear the smile in his voice. “I’ll try to pick them up more… Are you always there during pick-up?”

“Don’t change your schedule to come see me at work,” you joked.

“Can you blame me?”

“I guess not.” You grinned. “... I’m taking care of Ari’s and Jiu’s classes all days except for Mondays. I’ll be there for their play at the end of the month too.”

“Shit- I forgot about the play…” Mingyu groaned. “You know what? I’ll make time for it… I just have to move some things around in my schedule.”

“They’ll be very pleased if you show up,” you promised. “Those girls have been working extra hard, from what I heard.” You heard someone crying in the background and Mingyu cooing at, who you thought must be, one of his daughters. He was holding the phone away from him, but you could hear his comforting words and the shuffling of clothes as he probably lifted the child into his arms.

“Sorry, Y/N, Ari had a nightmare,” he said in a hushed tone. “I’ll see you soon. We’re still on for coffee, right?”

“Of course,” you hummed. “Don’t forget the play.” “I won’t,” he promised and hung up.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ PART TWO. After that phone call, Mingyu kept picking up the girls. He couldn’t do it all the time, of course, but he tried his hardest to show up. Mostly for his girls, especially after you told him how excited they get when they know he’s picking them up, but in part because he gets to see you again. Moreover, the increase in the days he would pick them up wasn’t going unnoticed by the twins. It was late afternoon.

Everyone had left the classroom except for Jiu and Ari, who were sitting in their places drawing. You had been cleaning up, but as soon as everything was put away and the tables were wiped, you sat down next to the girls - which is when you noticed an unusual detail in Jiu’s drawing. Ari always used to make scribbles, preferring to finger-paint or make interesting patterns across the paper with a pen, but Jiu always drew things as she saw them. This time, she had drawn a family portrait. On the page were two smaller people and two taller people. It was a man and a woman. The twins had never met their birth mom, but there was still a woman on the paper. You tried to calm down your nerves - but what if this was a cry for help? What if Jiu needed counseling and she just didn’t know how to say it? She was the quiet one of the two, so it wouldn’t surprise you if she had decided to hold it all in. Not wanting to make a scene, you decided to start a conversation with both of the twins.

“What are you making, girls?” you asked the both of them, looking over at Jiu’s painting with a tinge of worry in your chest.

“A rainbow flowerfield,” Ari said casually as her pen ran across the paper.

“A family portrait,” Jiu said quietly, intently focusing on the details of the grass.

“... could you tell me more about your painting, Jiu?” You studied the four figures on the page.

“That’s dad, me, and Ari.” She pointed out the figures on the paper, eventually getting to the fourth figure. “And that’s you.”

“Me?” You didn’t know if you misheard her, but Jiu nodded confidently. “Why am I in your family portrait, Jiu?”

“Because Dad talks about you all the time,” Ari answered for her sister. “And when Dad comes to pick us up, he always stays and talks with you.”

“You girls are attentive…” You cleared your throat.

“What does attentative mean?” Jiu asked. Before you could answer, Mingyu knocked on the already-opened door to gain your attention. You looked up at him, all of your thoughts disappearing at the sight of his smile.

“Ready to go, girls?” He asked.

“Gotta go, Mom.” Ari put away her things and grabbed her painting before running over to her dad. You hoped that Mingyu hadn’t heard her, but one look at him said otherwise. His eyes were wide, confused over whether he should laugh it off or be concerned. He opened his mouth to say something but shut it when he looked over at you. Jiu was still gathering her things and with Ari hanging onto his leg, Mingyu walked over to the table where the two of you sat. You stood up immediately, walking away to pretend that you were busy.

“It happens all the time,” you said, looking over your shoulder. It didn’t happen all the time, maybe once or twice per semester.

“I’m so sorry- I think it’s because they see us together so much and-”

“It’s because you talk about her all the time,” Ari interrupted her father. “And she takes care of us when you’re not here, like a mom.”

Mingyu’s face went red and avoided your gaze. Ari’s comment gave you the confidence to walk over to the small family again, having the upper hand now that you knew he talked about you.

“Do you talk about me, Mr. Kim?” you teased.

“Maybe sometimes- you know, before they have to go to school, I tell them to not cause any incidents for you,” he stammered out. "Last night, you asked if Ms. Y/L/N was sick,” Jiu added to the conversation, aiding her sister in the battle against their dad.

“Because you looked a bit tired,” he explained. “And I care about this school's staff- as anyone should.”

“But you never talk about Mr. Hong,” Ari said, “You only ask about Ms. Y/L/N.”

“Alright, girls, I think it's time for us to go home now.” Mingyu ushered the girls towards the door.

“But I want to stay with Mom.” Ari grinned widely, seemingly enjoying making her dad embarrassed.

“I won't go if she doesn’t.” Jiu joined in, crossing her arms over her chest and making her sister do the same.

“Girls, this is really inappropriate-”

“I could go get something to eat right now…” you said. “You girls like cake, right?” The twins cheered, hurrying to get their backpacks and coats. Mingyu looked over at you with a relieved expression. You walked over to your desk to grab your things, and when you turned around, you were met with a thankful-looking Mingyu.

“Cake always works,” you said. “It’s okay right?”

“Of course.” He smiled before turning to the girls again. “Let’s get some cake, ladies!”

There’s a cute little café around the corner from the primary school. You had gone there to celebrate your new job when you first got there, and you remember that their cakes and coffee were delicious. The four of you found a free corner of the booth, where the two girls got to sit on the couch while you and Mingyu took the chairs on the opposite side. While the twins were enjoying the cakes they had gotten, you were waiting for Mingyu to bring over the coffee. He came over with a small tray; standing on it were two cups of coffee and a piece of red velvet cake.

“You still like red velvet, right?” he asked.

“I do- but you didn’t have to.”

“It’s an apology,” he said. “For putting off our date for so long.”

You smiled and let your objections die down. One thing was for sure, Ari had gotten her stubbornness from her dad - and you didn’t want to start something you knew you would lose. Looking over at the two girls talking between themselves, then back at Mingyu, the realization of what you were doing washed over you.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” you mumbled.

“I’m happy you are, though,” Mingyu answered. “When Ari’s put her mind to something, she won’t stop until she gets her way.”

At hearing her name, Ari turned to her dad and stuck out her tongue - to which he, of course, responded by sticking out his tongue at her as well. You chuckled at the interaction and took a sip of your coffee.

“It’s a nice trait.” You put your cup back down. “And she finally got me that promised coffee date with you.”

Mingyu put a hand on your knee under the table, trying to convey that he was sorry for not doing this sooner. You sent him a gentle smile in return, making him take his hand away. You picked up the spoon from the tray, sliced into the cake with it, and took a first bite. It wasn’t as good as the muffins Mingyu had given you, but it was still lovely. Using the spoon to get another piece, you held it up to Mingyu’s lips this time. Holding your gaze, he let you feed him. For a moment, everything else disappeared. You had forgotten just how much Mingyu’s eyes could make you feel. However, the moment was ruined as you heard giggles across the table. You quickly put the spoon down and pretended like you hadn’t just gotten butterflies in your stomach.

“I’m glad you can be our mom,” Jiu said suddenly. “The other lady wasn’t as nice as you.” The other lady? You looked over at Mingyu again with an arched brow, silently asking him to explain himself.

“I was seeing someone before I met you. It ended pretty quickly… that’s why I spent some time at the cottage last year,” he explained, and the tension in your shoulders disappeared. “It isn’t nice to talk behind people’s backs, okay kids? And Ms. Y/L/N isn’t your mom.”

“Why not?” Ari asked.

“Because…” Mingyu tried to find an answer but trailed off instead. You weren’t one to put yourself into other people’s business, but explaining things to kids was your job - and you trusted that Mingyu wouldn’t take offense to you saying a few words at this moment, especially not since he kept glancing over at you.

“You know when you really like someone?” You said, getting the girls' attention. “You might decide that you’re going to hold hands or be together, right?” The two girls nodded. “We adults do the same thing,” you explained. “Except for us, there’s a stage before we say that we’re together. We spend some time getting to know each other better by going out and doing things like getting dinner or seeing a movie.”

“Are you doing that right now?” Jiu asked.

“Not exactly…” You looked over at Mingyu, who gave you a supportive nod. “Usually, you spend time alone together, and I haven’t gotten to do that with your dad… so we’re not together, and that’s why I can’t be your mom.”

“Then I think he needs to hurry up,” Jiu deadpanned before taking the last bite of her cake. Glancing over at Mingyu again, you saw how flustered he had gotten from the comment. You decided at that moment that you’d join the girls in their teasing - seeing his flushed face was enough motivation.

“He should hurry, shouldn’t he?” you said, and both of the girls nodded. “Well, I’ll forgive him since he’s been so busy - but he needs to make up for it.”

“Could he take you out to dinner tomorrow night, then?” Mingyu asked with a sheepish smile.

“What do you think?” You turned to the girls. They were both furiously nodding, making you break out into a chuckle. You turned back to Mingyu, pretending to think it over. He looked like he was about to fall apart, so you decided to put him out of his misery. “Absolutely.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ It’s a Saturday evening when you’re getting ready for your date. You had spent your day at home, trying to find an outfit to wear for your night out. Mingyu had texted you to wear something pretty, but that it should be comfortable for you. With the vague directions, there were a myriad of things that you could put together. You hadn’t been on a real date since before Wonwoo - unless you counted what you and Mingyu did at the cottage as dating. The expectations were high, which left you feeling stressed. However, when you find an old dress in the back of your closet, you feel the tension in your shoulders melt away. It was a dress you had bought two years ago that you hadn’t gotten to wear yet - you had bought it yourself, which was unusual during your last relationship, without a plan for when you were going to wear it. You had just bought it because it was pretty, and it still managed to make you feel beautiful. For once, during these traumatic few years, you felt pretty and subsequently happy. You knew you shouldn’t base your happiness on your beauty, but was it so wrong to feel glee over getting ready and genuinely liking what the mirror showed you? The apartment phone rang, and you pressed the button to answer. A surge of energy went through your veins at the thought of Mingyu coming to get you - your heart quickening to a pitter-patter pace.

“Hello?” You said.

“Hi, sweetheart.” His voice rang sweetly in your ears. “Could you let me up?”

“I’ll come down to meet you!” you chimed. Mingyu’s soft chuckle even managed to make you weak in the knees over the apartment phone.

“Alright, I’ll see you soon.” When the elevator doors open, you can see Mingyu’s figure through the glass of the front door. Sprinting toward the door, you excitedly pulled it open to see all of him. Mingyu smiled as soon as he saw you, making your heart feel even warmer. His eyes traveled up and down your body, drinking in your appearance. He looked fantastic himself, in his usual suit and perfectly styled hair.

“Hi,” you said as you closed the door behind you, unable to look away from him.

“Wow,” was all Mingyu said.

“Do you like it?” You looked down at the dress, twisting and turning so that he could see a little more of it.

“You look stunning,” he said, holding his hand out for you to take. “I love it.”

You take his hand, and he guides you away from the apartment complex. His words made you feel giddy, the kind of feeling you get when you watch a very romantic movie with a handsome lead. At the end of the street, you see a cab waiting for you. The walk to the car is silent but filled with anticipation. Mingyu’s hand is warm in yours, his thumb gently rubbing the back of your hand. When you arrive at the cab, Mingyu opens the door for you and holds your hand while you get in before he gets in beside you. The evening started with drinks. As you had expected, the restaurant he took you to was fancy. You had been to these kinds of places before, but it had been a while - and you had never been to this particular place. Mingyu ordered for you, per your request, and you ended up being pleasantly surprised. The food was almost too pretty to eat, but when you did, it was like your mouth had an orgasm. Your eyes widened as you chewed, looking over at Mingyu to see if he was having the same experience. He was looking at you with an amused smile.

“Are you okay?” He asked.

“More than okay.” You put down your fork as if you could take a break from the intense flavor. “This is delicious.”

“I’m glad you like it.” Mingyu chuckled.

“I do- I mean, maybe it’s because I haven’t eaten something like this in a while…” You picked up your wine glass and brought it to your lips.

“Well, it’s our first date, so it has to be special.” Mingyu was looking down at his plate, an uncharacteristically shy smile playing on his lips.

“It is special.” You put your hand, palm facing up, on the table. “I’m happy you asked me out.”

Mingyu put his hand in yours, locking eyes with yours again. The two of you look at each other, the rest of the restaurant fading away. Butterflies fly out of your ribcage, tickling the insides of your chest with their wings. Mingyu looks like your dream man; kind eyes, a pretty smile, and a beautiful man in general - the definition of tall, dark, and handsome. Not only that, he was kind and understanding; patient and confident. The waiter walking over to give the two of you your next meal was the only reason you broke out of your trance. You thanked the waiter and ogled at the delicious-looking food. Another waiter came by to pour you more wine. While you were reacting to your surroundings, Mingyu stayed looking at you lovingly.

“Do you want to go dancing after this?” He asked suddenly.

“Dancing? What kind of dancing?”

“Ballroom dancing,” Mingyu said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I know a place.”

“Why am I not surprised?” You chuckled. “Sure, I’ll go dancing with you.” Mingyu squeezed your hand before letting go to start eating.

After dinner, the two of you get back into a cab and travel from the city towards the suburbs. You had no idea where he was taking you, but you trusted him fully - maybe it was the alcohol, or Mingyu had truly laid out all of his cards on the table for you to see. In the back of the cab, you were sitting cuddled up next to Mingyu. His warmth was intoxicating, and you found yourself sinking further and further into his shoulder. Outside, the city lights grew fewer and fewer as you got closer to your destination in the suburbs. There were the occasional streetlights, but they were less bright than everything in the city. Darkness lulled over you like a parental blanket, urging you to close your eyes and sleep in the comfort of Mingyu’s presence. However, before you could fall asleep, you had arrived at your destination and Mingyu helped you out of the cab. You had stopped in front of a beautiful, old building with large windows. Music was playing inside, which you could hear from where you were standing on the sidewalk, but it was too muddled to figure out what it was. The chilly air woke you up somewhat, but sleep still lingered in the corner of your eyes.

“Don’t fall asleep on me just yet, sweetheart.” Mingyu came up beside you after paying for the cab and let you hook your arm around his. “This is one of my favorite places, I’m practically a regular, and I want you to enjoy it with me.”

“Then I have to stay awake, don’t I?” You steadied yourself against the man beside you and followed him inside the establishment. When you walk inside, Mingyu says his name to the receptionist, and they let him inside. He wasn’t lying when he said he was a regular. The corridor was wide and lit with warm-tinted lamps, giving everything a golden hue. It looked straight out of an Art Deco architecture magazine; marble floors with a geometric design, dark green walls, and golden details here and there. You were glad that you hadn’t fallen asleep - especially as you approached the ballroom. It was a large, round room - in the middle of which people were currently dancing. You could see a few people who looked to be around your age, but most of them seemed to be pensioners.

“You weren’t joking about ballroom dancing,” you said. “Why would I?”

He grinned and offered you his hand. “Would you like to dance with me?”

“Oh- well, I’m not any good-”

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” Mingyu grabbed your hand and dragged you out to the dance floor. One of his hands rested on your waist while the other still held yours. It was a simple foxtrot, but you still had trouble following along. You kept stepping on Mingyu’s feet, cringing every time you did. However, when you tried to look down to see what you were doing, you were quickly corrected by Mingyu. He’d remove his hand from your waist to lift your chin back up, making you face him. Each time you’d huff, and he’d chuckle at your annoyance. It all became a little easier when a little slower song came on: Body & Soul by Billie Holiday. Mingyu brought you in a little closer, your chests touching completely. His cheek leaned against yours, and his hand on your back traveled up to rest right by your shoulder blades. The two of you simply swayed, moving in small steps around the room. In this relaxed tempo, you could finally stop and think.

“Why are you a regular here?” You asked.

“I’m not really,” he explained, “They’ve held a few charities here that I’ve donated to, and sometimes they hold events here for the people at the retirement home that you can volunteer for. I go whenever I have the time, so they’ve seen a lot of me.”

“Are you even real?” You jokingly asked as you removed your cheek from his to take a good look at him. “Is there anything you can’t do?”

“Well…” He breathed out. “There’s this woman that I’m practically head over heels for… but I can’t seem to get my shit together and kiss her, even though it’s all I can think about.”

“Oh?” You raised your eyebrow at him, playing along. “Tell me more about this woman.”

“Alright... First of all, she’s gorgeous,” he hummed. “More importantly, she’s warm-hearted, and she’s great with my kids- which is a big deal breaker for me… and I admire her strength, how she can keep going after what she’s been through.”

“Yeah?” You wrapped both of your arms around his neck.

“Yeah,” he said.

“I think she wants to kiss you, too,” you admitted. Mingyu put his free hand on your cheek, bringing you in for a chaste kiss… followed by another, slightly longer one. The two of you stopped moving, focusing on just getting closer. When he pulled away from you, he started smiling proudly.

“As much as I loved being here, I really want to leave with you now,” you murmured.

“Your wish is my command, sweetheart.” Mingyu pecked your lips a final time before leading you off the dance floor.

Outside the venue, the air was colder than it had been when you had gotten out of the cab earlier that evening. Noticing your shivering, Mingyu shrugged off his jacket and put it around your shoulders. You were about to protest, but feeling the warmth wrap around you made you quiet down.

“Thank you,” you said to him.

“I can’t have you getting a cold on our first date,” he mumbled. “Do you want to walk around for a bit? This place is peaceful at this time of night.”

“I’d like that.” You gave him a nod and a smile, locking arms with him again. Mingyu walked slowly with you down the street. It was peaceful, as he had said; most of the lights in the houses were off, but the few homes that were still awake gave the street a certain glow. It all feels magical, too good to be true… which it is. You don’t recognize him at first. You only see a couple walking with their stroller. However, when they get closer, you can’t help but recognize your ex-husband. Surprisingly, he doesn’t see you at first - he notices Mingyu first.

“Kim Mingyu!” He said with a smile and a wave. “What are you doing all the way out here?”

“Mr. Jeon.” Mingyu goes to shake your old lover’s hand. “How have you been? I haven’t seen you since our meeting.”

The two of them talked while you stood frozen in fear. Do they know each other? How had you never seen them together before? Your eyes went over to the stroller, and seeing the baby in it made your heart sink. She looked like Wonwoo - you had seen his baby photos, and she was almost a complete replica of them. Gyeong Hui gave you a bittersweet smile, looking at you with knowing eyes. She had already recognized you. Looking back at Wonwoo, who was still talking to Mingyu, you wondered if he was happy. All of these thoughts were washed away when you finally met Wonwoo’s gaze. For a moment, you forgot that he had moved on from you. His eyes were kind, a soft smile on his lips. However, as quickly as he managed to make you feel comfortable, he also made your nerves worse.

“Y/N…” he said. “Hi.”

“Hi, Wonwoo.” Your voice was weak, more so than you wanted to.

“Ah… is this the Mingyu you were talking about?” He pointed between you and Mingyu, and you could feel the man next to you tense up.

“I… uh…” You looked at Mingyu, who didn’t show a twinge of confusion despite you being caught in your lie. “Yes.”

“Well, I’m glad you found someone like him.” Wonwoo approving of your relationship was the last thing you wanted. You didn’t want him to have anything to do with your new relationship - you just wanted him out of your life. After some small talk, you go your separate ways. Wonwoo goes home with his family, and you’re left standing, feeling like the husk of yourself. Mingyu’s hand rested on your back, rubbing it comfortingly.

“I didn’t know…” he said.

“It’s okay,” you muttered. “I’m sorry about telling him I was seeing you- I didn’t even know what I was thinking. I just met him while on my way to work- I hadn’t even seen you since the cottages, but I just blurted out that we were dating and-”

“You don’t have to explain,” he interrupted. “It’s a little flattering in a way.”

You chuckled, immediately feeling lighter as he joked it away. Mingyu brought you in for a hug, letting you bury your face in his warm chest. Wrapping your arms around him, you felt tears start burning in your eyes. When Mingyu heard you sniffle, he put his hand on the back of your head - silently telling you to stay and cry for as long as you need to. You grip onto his shirt, probably creasing the expensive material. You couldn’t bring yourself to fully sob, but a few tears escaped from the corner of your eyes.

“Do you want me to call a cab and take you home?” Mingyu asked. You nodded, and Mingyu immediately pulled out his phone. Standing outside your apartment complex, Mingyu was still holding your hand. Your eyes were red and puffy from crying in the cab, but he didn’t seem to mind.

“I’m sorry for ruining tonight,” you said.

“You didn’t.” He squeezed your hand. “I knew that things wouldn’t be completely normal with you, and I’m fine with that.”

“Stop being so perfect,” you jokingly groaned and leaned your head against his shoulder.

“Sorry, I can’t help it.” Mingyu laughed. You looked back up at him. Even if it was just a joke, to you, he truly was perfect. His big puppy-dog eyes looked back down at you as if he were trying to figure out what you were thinking about. When you leaned a little closer, Mingyu took the opportunity to lean down and press a kiss on your lips. It was chaste and sweet but left you wanting more.

“Goodnight, sweetheart.” As Mingyu went to leave, you didn’t let go of his hand. You couldn’t.

“... could you stay with me tonight?” You asked.

“Are you sure? You don’t want to be alone?”

“If you have a babysitter at home, I get it.” You put your other hand on his. “But I want you here, Mingyu.”

“Well, I can’t say no to that.” He smiles. “The girls are with their grandparents. I’ll just tell them that I’ll come by a little later tomorrow to pick them up.”

Mingyu made himself at home in your apartment, sitting with you on the couch while a movie is playing on the TV. Your head is on his chest, and Mingyu’s arm is wrapped around you. The domestic scene feels just right as if you’d been doing this for years together. However, as it gets late, you realize that you don’t have any clothes for Mingyu to borrow. He was still in his suit, sans jacket, and that couldn’t be too comfortable. So, while Mingyu was washing up in the bathroom, you were furiously looking through your wardrobe to find something for him to wear. You were so focused on the task at hand that you didn’t hear Mingyu walking into the room.

“Did you lose something?” He asked. His sudden question made you jump, quickly whipped around to look at him. Mingyu was holding his neatly folded clothes in his hands, putting himself on full display. He was standing confidently in nothing but his underwear as if he was straight out of a Calvin Klein ad.

“... I was going to find you something to wear.” You looked him up and down. “I guess that’s not an issue anymore.”

“Don’t act like you haven’t seen me naked before,” he joked.

“No, I-” You huffed. “I just wanted to make sure you’re comfortable.”

“I appreciate it, sweetheart, but I’m fine just like this if you are.” He put down his clothes on a nearby chair. “And if you want me to sleep on the couch, I’ll do that.”

“I want to sleep with you.” You regretted it as soon as you said it, twisting your face in embarrassment as you heard Mingyu chuckle. “I mean… I want to sleep next to you… I’m going to wash up. Make yourself comfortable.”

Before Mingyu could tease you, you left the room. You could hear him laugh behind you, making your cheeks get even hotter. After washing up in the bathroom, you change into your somewhat embarrassing pajamas and go back to the bedroom. Mingyu was lying in your bed. The covers dragged up to his mid-torso. He was scrolling on his phone but looked up as soon as he heard you come in. His eyes focused on your white pajama pants with small red hearts, a big grin appearing on his face.

“Don’t laugh,” you warned.

“They’re cute,” he assured you. Mingyu reached over to the other side of the bed, pulling away the covers for you to get in. Walking up to the side of the bed, you hesitantly sit down. You hadn’t slept in the same bed as him for over a year. It felt weird to see him like this like you were trying to remake a distant memory. Nevertheless, you lay down and pull up the covers. As Mingyu turns over to turn off the light, you watch his back carefully. A need to reach out and touch his bare skin fills you, burning in the bottom of your stomach. When Mingyu turned back around, he shuffled closer to you but didn’t touch you yet.

“... do you still like to cuddle to fall asleep?” he mumbled. Y

ou nodded and immediately shut your eyes as Mingyu wrapped his arms around you. His body was warm, and every muscle in your body relaxed under his touch. Your head was on his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. At first, Mingyu’s hands stayed still on your back. However, they soon started moving around - drawing circles on your skin over the fabric of your shirt and even letting his fingers slide under the hem of your shirt.

“Mingyu…” you hummed.

“Yes, sweetheart?” He asked innocently while his hands continued feeling you up.

“What are you doing?” You smiled, burying your face deeper in his chest.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No.”

Mingyu’s hand made their way to the top of your pajama bottoms. Grazing the skin under the fabric, he whispered out if it was okay - to which you whimpered out a yes. He pulled down your pants to your mid-thigh, groping your ass before turning you around to lay with your back against his chest. You felt his semi-hard cock poking against your ass. The anticipation of finally feeling him inside you again made you dizzy. His hand cupped your pussy over the thin material of your underwear, then let his hand up to the hem of your panties… only to go past them and rest on your lower stomach.

“Gyu?” You mumbled as you were brought out of your daze.

“Are you sure you want this?” he muttered against the skin of your neck. You turned around to look at him. His pupils were blown out, but his eyes were still filled with worry. You got closer to him, pressing your lips against his in an attempt to show him how much you needed him right now. Mingyu responded to your kiss but pulled away just a few seconds later - his lips ghosting over yours.

“I just mean that you were upset before– I didn’t think before I started this,” he explained softly. “And I don’t want you to feel like you have to or do it because you’re not in the right state of mind… you just looked so pretty, and I-”

“Gyu,” you repeated, getting him to stop talking. “I want you.” Your lips reconnected, and you could feel Mingyu smiling against you. You cling onto Mingyu’s shoulders as he turned you over to be on top of him. In the middle of your kiss, you managed to kick your pajama pants off - only breaking contact to let out a soft giggle at the strange situation. Sitting comfortably with your legs on either side of his hips, you began pressing quick kisses to his jaw. Trailing kisses down his neck, you find a sensitive spot right by his ear - that made a whine slip out between his lips when you attached your lips to it.

“I thought I had figured out how to push all of your buttons already,” you muttered against his skin.

“Guess you’ll have to keep experimenting on me.” He grinned. “I’m a willing test subject.”

“Of course you are,” you purred. You got down to his hips, pulling at his underwear until he helped you take them off. His big cock slapped against his abdomen, and your mouth watered at the sight. While Mingyu’s hands were gripping your pillows, you were trying to take his entire length in your mouth. Peering up at him through your lashes, you could see his face contorted in pleasure.

“I missed your mouth so much, baby,” he whined, and you hummed in response. “Fuck… you’re gonna make me cum from just that…” He gently grabbed your hair and pulled you off him. “Save it for another time,” he rasped. “I need to fuck you, please…”

“Do you have a condom?” you asked. “I don’t have any here…”

“No… but I got checked just a couple of months ago. I haven’t been with anyone since you last year,” he admitted.

“Are you asking me if you can fuck me raw?” You grinned.

“Yes?” You crawled back up to kiss him, letting him taste himself on your tongue. He moaned into your mouth, and you felt yourself getting more and more lost in pleasure. Mingyu grabbed your hips, subtly moving them over his abs. Feeling the soft ridges over the material of your panties made you whine. You broke the kiss, trying to catch your breath.

“Fuck me. I need you to take control of me,” you murmured. “Do what you want with me– just let me forget everything…”

Something in him snapped, and before you knew it, Mingyu had flipped you over, manhandling you to have your ass up in the air. Your chest was pressed against your mattress, your face hidden in the pillows. His cock, after having teased your entrance, stretched you out. He hadn’t prepped you for it at all, but he had gotten you wet enough to slide it in without much effort. A soft moan of relief left your lips as he bottomed out.

“Move,” you grunted. He followed your orders immediately, pulling out almost completely before thrusting back into you. You could picture his expression in front of you; his eyebrows knitted together, his eyes shut tight, and his mouth hung wide open. His hands were gripping your hips, pulling you back as he thrust his hips. The noises he was making were almost animalistic and mixed with the filthy sounds coming out of your mouth, you knew you were going to get a noise complaint. You couldn’t help it, and you didn’t care. Mingyu had never been so domineering before - asking him to take full control of you must have flipped a switch in his brain. So when he pulled you up by your hair, wrapping an arm around your middle to hold you there, you let out a surprised gasp. His thrusts continued while he started kissing the side of your neck.

“I’m better than him, aren’t I?” He grunted. At first, his words didn’t meet your brain, too far gone to process what he was saying. But when you finally understood what he had said, you were shocked at his bluntness. More importantly, you were shocked at how much you liked it.

“Yes,” you moaned. “

Say it.” “You’re better than him,” you whined. “Fuck– you’re bigger than him, too!”

“Yeah?” He thrust harder into you. “Gonna make you forget all about him… do you want that, baby?”

Words couldn’t come out of your mouth. Your jaw was slack, Mingyu coaxing moan after moan from your throat, and you could only nod. With inappropriately gentle hands, Mingyu helped you lay down with your back on the bed. The empty feeling you got when he pulled out of you made you whine, but you were soon shut up by Mingyu burying himself in you again. As he continued thrusting, his lips attached to your clavicle - trailing down to your chest to let his tongue slide over the pebbled flesh. Your fingers entangled themselves in his hair, holding him there.

“You’re making me feel so good, Gyu,” you whined, followed by a string of curses. “Please, make me cum!”

With a new motivation, Mingyu’s lips left you as he focused all of his energy on your cunt. Thrusting into your sopping hole and rubbing your clit until you were convulsing under him. As your eyes rolled into the back of your head, you saw a bright light and felt a warmth spreading from your core. After your orgasm, your limbs grew limp, and you didn’t even have the energy to open your eyes. Mingyu pulled out of you, cumming on your stomach after pumping his cock in his hand a few times. He collapsed beside you, making sure not to crush you with his body.

“Sweetheart?” His voice rang sweetly in your ears, making you smile. “Are you still awake?”

You hummed, turning to hug him closer. He welcomed you in his arms, and when your sweaty skin met his, you could swear that you could feel static between you. After a while of staying in the same position, you found yourself almost falling asleep. You knew that you’d hate yourself in the morning if you didn’t clean up, so you gently tapped Mingyu’s shoulder to get his attention.

“Can you help me to the bathroom?” you whispered. “Sure, sweetheart.”

Mingyu got up, stretching slightly before he picked you up like you weighed nothing. He carried you over to the bathroom with your guidance and put you down to draw the two of you a bath. You handed him some of your bath products - calming serums, bath bubbles, the works - which he put in without question. When your bathroom started smelling like an English garden and the bathtub was filled with water, Mingyu helped you into the tub and then sat down behind you. You settled in your place, relaxing your muscles in the hot water, and leaned your back against Mingyu’s broad chest. A sigh escaped your lips, and Mingyu chuckled.

“Feeling tired?” He teased, and you nodded.

“Yeah,” you breathed out. “It was worth it, though.” Mingyu wrapped his arms around your waist, burying his face in the crook of your neck. He pressed chaste kisses to your sensitive skin - suddenly so different from the way he was before. You turned your head to give him more access, but Mingyu’s kisses stopped.

“It was good then?” he asked with a slight hint of worry laced in his tone.

“Really good.” You looked at him over your shoulder. “I didn’t know you had that side in you.”

“There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.” He pecked the side of your mouth. “You’ll find out.”

You grinned and turned back around, settling back into your previous position. The two of you sat there for a while until the water wasn’t quite as hot anymore. When you got back out, you drained the bath and washed off quickly before wrapping yourselves in fluffy towels. Your legs were still sore, but not as much as they were before the bath. Still, Mingyu insisted on helping you back to bed. After laying you down, he pulled the covers over your body and went around the bed to get in himself. Neither of you had bothered with putting on new clothes, and you found yourself enjoying the feeling of his skin against yours - nothing was in between you.

“Do you want me to stay tomorrow?” Mingyu asked suddenly.

“Why wouldn’t I want you to stay?” You chuckled. “I thought you might want space,” he mumbled.

“I’ve had enough space from you,” you reminded him. “Stay for as long as you want, Gyu.” Mingyu let out a giggle - you would never get over the feeling you got from hearing this big, confident man giggle. His arms wrapped a little tighter around you, pressing your face into his chest, and he put his chin on the top of your head. Mingyu’s giggle was contagious, almost like he was transmitting his energy to you.

“What?”

“I like it when you call me Gyu,” he said.

“Good,” you hummed. “Sleep well, Gyu.”

“Goodnight, sweetheart.” He pressed a kiss on the top of your head. You stayed with your ear pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. It started out fast, but as he slowly fell asleep, it started slowing down as well. The rhythm made you drift away to sleep.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ PART THREE. The next time you saw Mingyu, it was unexpected. You had decided to go to the park to enjoy the spring warmth and an excellent book. It was Sunday the week after your date, which meant that you didn't have any work, and you could do whatever you liked with your time. The thought of asking Mingyu if he wanted to meet up certainly popped into your brain, but you assumed that he was busy. You had been texting him frequently, and he had shown up to pick up his kids almost every day the past week, but you still felt a little awkward to ask him out suddenly. The possibility of rejection was too high - he could be busy with work or with his kids, and you didn’t want to interrupt either of those things.

The park was big, another plus of living in a well-off neighborhood, and it had many benches where you could spend your leisure time. The weather was just right, not too cold and not too hot. There were some concerning dark clouds in the sky, but they were too far away for you to care about them. Most of the park was just fields, which was perfect for the dogs running around, but there were also small patches of trees and a few playgrounds here and there. It was a peaceful scene this early in the day. After walking for a while, you found a spot by a small duck pond with a bench looking over the water. After sitting down, you pulled out your book and started reading. It felt nice to get out of your apartment. if you hadn't, you would've been sitting on the couch watching yet another show by now. The thought was tantalizing, but being here was better for your overall health. Besides, if you hadn't ended up sitting down at that bench, you wouldn't have met up with Mingyu. In the distance, you could hear a familiar pitchy voice shout your name. When you looked up, you saw two kids running toward you.

“Ms. Y/L/N!” Ari shouted with a big smile, her sister running right beside her.

Behind them, you could see Mingyu walking towards you. He was unusually dressed down - just light-wash jeans and a white collared shirt under a thin jacket - but it suited him. You put your finger where you left off on the page before closing the book. A smile spread across your lips as you watched the two girls approach you, and you put the book back in your bag to greet them.

“What are you guys doing here?” You asked as they reached the bench you were sitting on.

“We decided to take a morning walk to the duck pond.” Mingyu had caught up with the twins, now standing just a little bit away from the bench. “We tried our luck on the other side of the pond, but the ducks over there didn’t like us.”

“He was going to feed the ducks with us, but the ducks swam away,” Jiu explained.

“Yeah…” Ari disappointedly looked up at her dad, “He scared them away.”

“I was trying to get closer to them!” he exclaimed with an embarrassed look on his face. You let out a soft laugh at the trio. Their antics were endless, but you enjoyed watching the show they put on. A small ache took its place in your chest. Watching them made you remember the family that you had always wanted.

“Dad's also helping us practice for the play,” Jiu added. “Because he said he can't come on Friday, so he wanted to watch us do it now.”

You had almost forgotten that the play was just in a few days. Seeing the brave faces the girls put on, despite clearly being sad at the knowledge of their dad’s absence at the play, made your heart sink.

“You can't be there?” You furrowed your brows as you looked up at Mingyu.

“There's a meeting I have to be at, and it ends right as the play is supposed to start.” He sighed. “I told them I would try to make it, but, you know…”

“Well, I heard that they record the plays, so... maybe I can get you a copy of that,” you suggested. “But I do hope that you at least try to get there, even if you only see the last parts.”

"Of course…” He nodded, and the conversation faded into silence. “... I texted you this morning.”

“You did?” You took your phone out of your bag. “Sorry, I put my phone on silent earlier.”

It was a short message, a simple question if you would like to meet up in the park. You smiled when you saw it. When you looked back up at him, he was looking away. A slight blush was spread across his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

“Dad said you couldn't come with us to see the ducks. Did you change your mind?” Jiu asked. Her question made Mingyu's face grow even redder, and your smile grew fonder. You looked down at Jiu, brushing a few strands of hair out of her face.

“Yes, I did,” you said and stood up.

“Oh, but if you're busy-” Mingyu started, but you quickly cut him off.

“I'm not busy,” you assured him.

Mingyu’s smile when you told him you’d join them made your heart soar, and you realized at that moment that you’d do anything to make him happy. You spent the day with Mingyu and his daughters, feeding the ducks, going to the playground, and simply enjoying each other's company. Towards the middle of the afternoon, the clouds that you hadn't bothered being worried about were a lot closer than before. Mingyu helped the girls zip up their coats before he turned to you. You were just wearing a blouse and a skirt since you weren't expecting to stay at the park for so long. It was cold, but nothing you couldn’t handle.

“Are you cold?” Mingyu asked, although he was already shrugging off his jacket.

“I’m fine, Mingyu,” you tried to protest, but it was in vain. Mingyu's jacket engulfed your shoulders as he draped it around you. He fixed the collar of the jacket to hang securely, also letting his hands stay near you. You looked up at his face. He was staring right at you with a warm look in his eye. You remembered the night you had spent together last week, wishing to go back there.

“I wouldn't want you to catch a cold,” he murmured. “You take care of my kids, after all.”

“Is that the only reason?” you asked, faking being offended.

“Of course not,” he said with a small smile as he gently pushed some hair out of your face. He opened his mouth to add something, but before he could it started raining. Small droplets landed on your nose. You looked up at the about-to-be-downpour and took a step away from him.

“We should go home,” Mingyu said, turning to his girls. “What do you say, girls?”

“Will Ms. Y/L/N come with us?” they asked.

“No, girls, I have to go home.” You crouched down to their eye level. “But I will see you tomorrow, okay?”

They both nodded and unexpectedly swung their small arms around your neck - the force almost making you stumble backward. You hugged them back and glanced up at Mingyu.

“I will see you tomorrow, too then?” He asked as you stood up.

“Of course.” You smiled. “I have to return this jacket, after all.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ The very next day, you were in your usual classroom, waiting for Mingyu to pick up his daughters. They were the last ones there, as they always were, but this time it was getting very late. You were stealing worried glances at the clock every other minute. What if something had happened to him on the way here? It was late enough for you to call him up and ask him where he was, and if he didn’t pick up, you’d need to call the kids’ grandparents.

“Did your dad say that he would be later than usual today?” You asked the girls carefully.

“No,” Ari said. “But he looked tired, so maybe he fell asleep.”

Before you could question her any further, Mingyu barged in through the door. If you thought seeing him in jeans and a t-shirt was weird, it was even stranger to see him in sweatpants. Like Ari said, he looked exhausted - even sick.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, and you couldn’t tell if he meant it for you or his twins. “I didn’t mean to be late, and I fell asleep in my study-”

“Slow down-” You tried to interrupt his ramblings, but he ended up interrupting himself with a sneeze.

“Mingyu, are you alright?” You got up from your chair and approached him. At first, Mingyu was apprehensive to let you near him. However, he didn’t have the energy to get away from you and ended up even leaning into you when you put your palm against his forehead.

“You’re burning up,” you mumbled.

“I just have a small fever, I’m…” He let out a soft sigh as you repositioned your hand to cup his cheek. “That feels nice.”

The girls giggled behind you, reminding you that they were still there and that you should try to not make a scene to worry them. Despite how endearing Mingyu looked right now, you took your hand away from his face. He was stumbling even though he wasn’t moving, and you quickly got him to sit down in a chair.

“Why didn’t you let your parents pick them up?” You whispered to him. “You didn’t go to work like this, did you?”

“I did... they sent me home, so I worked in my home office,” he explained with a goofy grin. “It's a lot nicer to work from home. I don't have to dress up... but I didn't want to miss seeing you, so I didn't bother asking my parents.”

Your blood started pumping with irritation as he kept smiling. He was taking this way too lightly - this was his health he was talking about, and he was joking it away. Did he just not care?

“Kim Mingyu, you are so incredibly irresponsible,” you said, making his smile fade away. “You should be resting… Did you drive here?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“I’ll drive you home.” You sighed. “Is that okay with you?”

Mingyu handed you his keys, which you quickly accepted. This was definitely against some sort of work code, but you didn't care. These girls needed to get home safely, and Mingyu needed to rest as much as he could.

“Let’s go, girls,” you said. “I’m taking you home.”

You walked out with Mingyu leaning against you and the twins following close behind. Lucky for you, your coworkers were nowhere to be seen - probably because of the late hour. It went smoothly to get out of the building, and the parking lot was pretty much empty too. You remembered what Mingyu’s car looked like and found it with minimal guidance from the man beside you. After getting the girls into their respective seats and buckling their seat belts, you got into the driver's seat. Mingyu was sitting beside you, leaning his head against the headrest. Now that he could settle down and had his eyes closed, he looked peaceful. You still had his jacket from yesterday that you had tucked under your arm before walking out of the building. Mingyu was shivering despite you turning up the heat in the car, so you took the jacket and draped it over his chest. Looking back at the girls, you tried to look confident and not like you were worried sick about their dad.

“Are you ready to go home, girls?” You asked and they both nodded. Turning back to face the wheel, you took a deep breath before starting the car. You drove them to their home, following the GPS' orders carefully. Mingyu was asleep during the drive, and the girls sat in the backseat, whispering and giggling. When you got to the destination, you had to wake him up, shaking his shoulder gently while keeping your eyes on the road.

“Sorry to wake you,” you murmured. “Where am I supposed to park?”

“It's this house right there. Just park the car right in front of the garage... I'll fix it later,” he mumbled.

It was a big, modern house - probably newly built just a few years ago. Big floor-to-ceiling windows took up most of the otherwise white walls with dark wooden details. It was pretty much a box with a lot of interesting extensions, giving the whole house a very structured geometric feel. Shaking off the wonder you felt from just staring at the outside of the house, you parked and got out to help the girls. Mingyu went out shortly after you, still stumbling slightly as he walked towards the door.

“I’ll unlock the door,” he said with a yawn.

The inside of the home was well decorated and had dark wooden floors, matching the exterior details. There was a big living room area, which was connected to a patio. You could see back into the garden through the big glass sliding doors, quickly noticing a pool back there. The kitchen was also in the downstairs area. The cabinets were black, and the floor was lined with classic black and white tiles. Everything looked neatly put together, especially compared to your apartment. You helped the kids with their shoes and jackets, letting them run ahead after you were done. Mingyu took off his shoes by himself before slumping against the wall.

“You should go to bed,” you told him.

“Will you go with me?” He asked in a flirtatious tone.

“You’re getting on my nerves today…” You sighed and tried to bite back your smile. “I’ll put on the TV for the girls and help you to bed. Is that okay?”

Mingyu nodded, and you quickly went into the living room. The twins were already sitting on the couch, whispering between themselves.

“Do you girls want to watch something?”

“Yes, please!” They sounded in unison. You turned on the TV, after a few tries, and put on a show that the girls said they wanted to watch. They were sucked into it before you knew it, and you hurried over to Mingyu, who was still slumped against the wall.

“Let’s get you to bed,” you murmured. “Where’s your bedroom?”

“Upstairs.” Mingyu’s bedroom was neat, but the bed was unmade. Everything was decorated in black, giving it a sleek look. Leaning against the headboard, you helped Mingyu get into bed and pull the covers over him. You sat down on the edge of the bed, watching him with worried eyes.

“Did you get sick yesterday?” You asked.

“I’ve been feeling a little under the weather for a while now,” he explained. “But I don’t think yesterday helped.”

“I’m sorry.” You took his hand in yours, bringing it to lay in your lap.

“It’s not your fault, sweetheart,” he said. “Thank you for taking me home… you were right. I was being irresponsible.” “Do you need anything else? I can make dinner for you and the girls.”

“That’d be very nice.” He nodded and closed his eyes. “I’ll help you. I just need to rest for a bit.”

“No, you won’t.” You sighed. “You’re going to rest up. I’ll bring food to you.”

“Thank you… please take care of the girls first. You can give me my food after putting them to bed- actually, I could get it myself. Just tell me when-”

“Mingyu,” you warned. “Let me take care of everything. I’ll put the girls to bed and get you food afterward, okay?”

“Okay…” Mingyu took a deep breath. “Their bedtime is eight o’clock sharp. Their room is down the hall to the right, in front of my office.”

“I’ll take care of it,” you promised and tucked him in a little better. “Rest well, okay?”

Mingyu let out a grunt for an answer as you got up to leave the room. Taking a final look at the sleeping Mingyu, you close the door behind you. The upstairs area wasn't as big as the downstairs area, but it was around the same size as your entire apartment. You looked around in awe, never having imagined that this was what Mingyu's home would look like. Despite having two kids, he kept everything clean - at least you thought so until you saw the kids' room. Toys were scattered here and there, but there was still enough space to walk around in the big room. There were two beds placed in separate corners of the room and a door to a closet in one of the corners. There was a window right in between the beds, allowing light to flow inside. The mess wasn't a big problem, just some stuff on the floor - it was easy enough for you to put away. You didn’t deep clean it, but you put away the toys where you thought they should be - a box with other toys in it put under the window. Once that was done, you explored further. You found the upstairs bathroom, where you noticed a toothbrush stand with three toothbrushes standing next to each other and one empty slot. After the bathroom, you found Mingyu's study, which you only took a glance at. This room was even messier than the girls' room. It was probably because he had left in a hurry before. Tissues were piling up in the trash, and papers were all over the dark wooden desk - as well as a few lying on the floor. The blinds were closed, leaving the room feeling closed off. You quickly left that room, not wanting to intrude any more than you already had. On your way to the staircase, you passed the upstairs bathroom and a room right in front of Mingyu's bedroom that you had somehow missed. The door was closed and even though you were curious, you decided to let it stay that way. When you got down the stairs, you found the girls still watching TV. Their attention went away from the screen as you came in to check on them.

“Are you feeling hungry?” you asked, and they both nodded. “Do you want to help me make some food?”

Making food with the girls was a fun experience. They were helpful when they were helping you find utensils or ingredients, but they still messed around a little. Whenever they had done something they shouldn’t have, like hiding the spices from you, they would let out a cute giggle. It would always give them away, but you still played along with them. After making dinner and tucking Jiu and Ari into bed, you got a plate of the leftovers and brought it up to Mingyu's room. The room was still dark, and he was still lying in bed in the same position you had left him in. Maybe he had shifted around a bit because his hair was a bit messier than before, but except for that hint, you couldn't tell. You sat down beside him and put your hand on his arm.

“I have some food for you,” you murmured. “And water.” Mingyu opened his eyes ever so slightly, shifting in the bed to bring his hands up to his face to rub the sleep out of his eyes. When he was done, he sat up, leaning his back against the headboard.

“You’re too nice to me,” he muttered in a raspy, sleep-laced voice.

“You would’ve done the same to me.” You handed him the glass of water. “Drink.”

You put the plate of food on his bedside table while he drank. A nervous feeling started spreading in your chest, suddenly realizing the position you were in. To combat these unfamiliar emotions, you got up and started closing the blinds.

“I put the girls to bed,” you said as you worked on closing the blinds. “They weren't very happy to go to sleep when you hadn't kissed them goodnight yet.”

“They get antsy if we don't follow the routine.” He chuckled. “Could you hand me the plate?”

After picking the plate back up, you sat down next to you. Without thinking, you took the spoon to feed him, like you used to do with the stubborn kids at the kindergarten you worked at before. Mingyu looked a little shocked but accepted the spoon by opening his mouth. Only after he had taken the bite did you realize what you had done.

“Oh- I’m sorry.” You felt heat rise to your face. “I didn’t mean to be patronizing- it’s an old habit from my last job-” Mingyu’s laugh stopped your rambling. You attempted to give him the plate, but he pushed it away. He couldn't get a word out, still trying to chew through the fit of giggles. His hand was over his mouth as he looked away from you. If he were to look into your lost puppy dog's eyes, he would start laughing again.

“It’s alright,” he said eventually. “I don’t mind being pampered… especially not by you.”

Your eyebrows shot up over your forehead. Mingyu motioned for you to come a bit closer, and you shuffled a few inches closer to him. He looked expectantly at the plate and then back at you. With a slightly shaky hand, you brought another spoon of food to his mouth, which he gladly accepted. Seeing him genuinely happy over this made you a bit more comfortable. You shuffled even closer to him, sitting down in a better position to feed him. It felt strange, and you couldn't help but chuckle at his happy expressions.

“Your cooking is good,” he mumbled between bites.

“It’s just something I threw together.” You brushed off his compliment. “It’s nothing special.”

“Thank you anyway,” he said before taking the last bite. After putting away the plate on the bedside table, you went to get up, but Mingyu grabbed your hand before you could leave. He peered up at you through his eyelashes, and you could’ve melted at the sight. Gently, he pulled you back towards him, and you sat down without any resistance. He let go of your hand and put his hand on your thigh.

“I’m sorry for causing so much trouble for you today,” he said. “It’s alright,” you hummed. “I wanted to help… and cooking with the kids was nice.”

“Well, I’m happy you could enjoy yourself.” He had a look in his eyes that you couldn’t figure out, but it was warm and loving. You wanted to know what he was thinking - what he thought of you. Suddenly you started hearing giggling from behind you. When you turned around, you saw two black-haired heads peeking out from the side of the doorframe. Your body was in the way for Mingyu to see them, but his daughters were grinning widely at the sight of the two of you. Even though he couldn’t see them, Mingyu understood that they were there from your reaction and the sound of their laughter.

“Girls, it’s bedtime!” Mingyu dictated with a stern yet kind tone of voice.

“But we didn’t get to say goodnight to you,” Ari argued. The girls ran inside the room and crawled up on the bed. You were about to get up to give them space when you noticed that Mingyu's hand hadn't moved from your leg. He squeezed it gently, and when your eyes met his, it looked like he was silently asking you to stay. So you sat there with them, watching as Mingyu spoke with his daughters and apologized for not saying goodnight earlier.

“I’m a little sick, so I had to rest,” he explained to the girls. “I’m sorry I missed your bedtime.”

“Are you better now?” Jiu asked.

“Did Ms. Y/L/N make you better?” Ari added.

“He's doing a lot better than he was before,” you said as you glanced between the man in front of you and his daughters. “But my expert opinion says that he still needs a full night's rest.”

“You can't kiss it better?” Ari asked, giggling with her sister.

“Yeah, you can't kiss it better?” Mingyu asked in a mocking tone, gently squeezing your leg again. You put your hand on top of his and put it down beside you again without looking over at him. Even if he was able to be very mature most of the time, he tended to bring out his childish side from time to time. As you took his hand away from your leg, he almost looked like he regretted saying it.

“A good night's rest is all he needs, I promise you,” you assured the twins, “And you two should also go back to bed.”

After a bit of complaining, they said goodnight to their dad and scurried back to their room. You looked after them until they had closed the bedroom door behind them. Mingyu’s hand snuck back to its place on your thigh.

“I’ll go check that they’re sleeping before I leave,” you said.

“You’re leaving?” He sounded surprised. His grimace after saying it made it clear that he didn’t mean for it to come out like that.

“Mingyu, I couldn’t possibly intrude any longer-”

“You’re not intruding,” Mingyu remarked. “I have a guest room, and you can borrow some clothes from me- you can take a shower if you want to, too. Just… I don’t want you to leave all on your own this late at night.”

He seemed so determined, and how could you give up on such an offer? His hand squeezed your leg again, a kind gesture that asked you to stay. You thought back to all the time you had spent together in the cabins. It had been so long that you seemed to have forgotten that you knew him quite well for just being his children's teacher. You took his hand in yours again, looking down at it to try to distract yourself from his strong gaze.

“I’m sorry for leaving before,” you mumbled. “At the cabins… it was so wrong of me, I’m sorry.” Mingyu turned his hand to intertwine his fingers with yours. You looked at him with a shy smile. For some reason, you had thought of your second meeting as a new beginning - but you can't just erase memories with another person to start over. The fact that you ever thought that felt deranged now.

“And I’m sorry for being a mess,” you continued when Mingyu hadn’t said anything for a while. “And for acting like nothing had happened when we finally met again-”

“Y/N,” he interrupted. “It’s okay. I wouldn’t have pursued you again if I didn’t accept all that. I like you, and I know you’ve been through something horrible. I can be patient with you. I want to be someone you can lean on… even if it doesn’t seem like it right now.”

You let out a stifled laugh and looked down at your intertwined hands. It felt nice to finally let your walls down a bit like you could finally let go of some of the tension you had been holding in your shoulders. Mingyu squeezed your hand, getting your attention back on him.

“I'm not going to ask you to sleep in my bed with me because, frankly, that'd be very stupid considering that I'm sick,” he said, making you laugh again. “But I just want to make sure that you don't have to go home alone and that you're safe.”

“Okay, I’ll stay,” you hummed. “Thank you.”

After taking a shower and changing into clothes that Mingyu let you borrow, you went straight to bed. It almost felt like a hotel bed, and the cozy feeling made you fall asleep immediately.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ The next morning you woke up to your alarm ringing an hour before you had to leave the door. Hearing sounds coming from downstairs, you quickly got up and went to see what was going on. The clanging came from the kitchen. You hadn’t made a plan for what would happen in the morning, and you wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself if you had accidentally left the kids unattended. However, when you arrived in the kitchen, you found Mingyu making breakfast and the girls tiredly waiting at the table. The noise was coming from the stove as he was cooking something that smelled delicious.

“Why are you up? Shouldn't you still be resting?” The words tumbled out of your mouth before you could even process them.

“Good morning to you too, doctor,” Mingyu said with a raspy voice and handed you a newly brewed cup of coffee. “You'll be happy to hear that my symptoms have-”

You pressed your hand against his forehead again, interrupting whatever he was going to joke about, his fever had gone down, and he looked a lot better than the day before. Mingyu took your hand away from his forehead.

“My symptoms have died down,” he repeated. “Just a runny nose and sore throat. What do you think? Am I too sick to make breakfast?” His eyes were glimmering in the low light of the kitchen lamp, and that warm smile never left his lips. If it weren't for the fact that he was sick, you would've kissed that smile off his face.

“No…” You sighed. “I overreacted, I’m sorry-”

“You didn’t,” he assured you. “It’s nice to have someone care for me like you do.”

Mingyu's arm sneakily wrapped itself around your waist and brought you closer. He leaned his forehead against yours, still looking into your eyes. You did your best to not spill anything out of your cup, but it was getting increasingly hard since you were starting to be distracted. You peered over your shoulder, noticing that the two of you had started getting the attention of the twins.

“Could we save this for another day?” you asked and put a hand on his chest. “Maybe when we're not being watched?”

Mingyu looked up, immediately locking eyes with Ari and Jiu, who were standing on top of their chairs to see. His face twisted from worry to irritation, and you could hear more laughter coming from the table. At the sound of the bell-like giggles, Mingyu had trouble holding his scolding gaze and not replacing it with a warm smile.

“Hey! Sit down in the chairs, or you'll fall over!” Mingyu said and let go of you to bring the girls their breakfast. You watched him walk away, chuckling at his attempt to scold them. As he warned the girls of the dangers of standing up on chairs, he was placing their breakfasts in front of them and making sure that they’d start eating. Mingyu was still grumbling when he came back, but when you walked up next to him and pressed a kiss to his cheek, he quickly quieted down. He looked at you with big eyes, doing mental loops to try to figure out what he had done to deserve it.

“Thank you for the coffee,” you said. “I’m going to go get ready, but I’ll see you soon.”

“Let me drive you,” he blurted out. “I need to take my girls there anyway.”

“If you feel fine, then I don’t see why not.”

“Oh, I’m feeling more than fine.” Mingyu leaned closer to you, but you put your hand on his chest to stop him.

“I don’t want to get sick,” you teased. “Besides, I’ve already given you a kiss.”

“I need another one to get all better.” He pouted.

“All you need is one,” you responded. “Doctor’s orders!” You watched his jaw go slack, tonguing his cheek as you started walking away.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ Arriving in yesterday’s clothes, wearing whatever make-up you had with you in your bag, caused suspicion. Not only that, you had walked in just a little bit before Kim Mingyu - a hot, single dad. Many of your coworkers didn’t notice or care, but your closest coworker Joshua definitely noticed. He was what some people would call your work husband, and usually, you’d tell him everything while you were welcoming your kids in your separate classrooms.

“Did you have fun last night?” He asked.

“My night was just fine, Mr. Hong,” you responded. Most of the time, the two of you would gossip loudly with each other - but you couldn’t yell about staying over at Kim Mingyu’s house. Especially not with so many kids around - his kids included. When all of the kids were in your respective classrooms, Joshua got a little closer.

“I saw you walking in here with Mr. Kim. What’s that about?” He whispered. “And I’ve never seen you in the same clothes two days in a row, so you have to tell me everything about last night.”

“I will…” You paused to let him celebrate getting your new gossip. “... At lunch.”

“You’re no fun.” Joshua sighed, making you laugh.

At the anticipated lunch, you sat down in the teacher’s lounge with Joshua in a corner of the room. The two of you sat in mostly silence, except for a few comments about your day so far or what you were going to do later while waiting for as many people as possible to leave. When it was just a few people in the room, Joshua turned to you with an expectant look in his eyes.

“Tell me everything,” he said.

“It was nothing.” You put down your cup of coffee. “He came in sick, and I helped drive him home…” Joshua raised one of his eyebrows, silently urging you to keep talking. “And I might have stayed the night at his house…” You sighed.

“How?” he questioned. “I mean, if that’d happen to anyone else, they wouldn’t let them stay in their house.”

“I might’ve known him since before I started this job…” You dragged out each word as if it’d help contain your secret a little longer. Your coworker stared at you with his jaw on the floor. He put away his lunch and sat back in his seat, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You have a lot of things to tell me,” Joshua asserted. “

Well, you know about my ex,” you said, and he nodded. “While trying to get over him, I stayed at my aunt’s cottage in the forest.”

“Yeah, you’ve said this.” He furrowed his eyebrows. “You stayed there for two weeks and came back to get your shit together. Am I missing something?”

“I didn’t tell you about my neighbor…” As soon as you said it, Joshua’s eyes widened. “The reason I decided to ‘get my shit together’ in the first place is because of him.”

“Mr. Kim?”

“Yes. He was there for me, and we developed some kind of relationship… but then I left without giving him my number or even saying goodbye.” You looked down at your lap. “I didn’t want to get hurt again.”

“Y/N…” Joshua put his hand on the table for you to take, which you did. “I’m sorry for prying about this, and you don’t have to continue.”

“It’s okay… I actually need your advice,” you said, and he nodded. “We met again when he picked up his kids- I didn’t even know he had kids, but it’s fine now. Now we’ve been seeing each other from time to time, trying to sort of pick up where we left it.”

“Oh my god.” Joshua leaned back in his chair again, letting go of your hand in the process. “You’re living in a rom-com.”

“Stop.” You chuckled. “Anyway, I care about him… but I don’t know where to go from here.”

“So you’ve been on dates?”

“We went on a date a few weeks ago, and then we ended up meeting in the park last Sunday,” you explained.

“And you’ve…?” Your silence spoke for itself, and Joshua cheered. He’d been on your ass to get back in the dating scene since you had told him about your ex. “You just need to get laid” was a daily comment you’d receive from him. “How is he?”

“Joshua.”

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry! I’ll drop it.” He paused and studied your expression for a few seconds. “He’s good, isn’t he?”

“I almost forgot my own name,” you whispered with your hand covering the side of your mouth, shielding your words from any potential listeners.

“Alright, alright.” He nodded proudly. “So you guys are getting serious?”

“I think so.”

“Okay, well, I’m happy for you,” he hummed. “He seems like a nice man, someone that you can grow with.” Joshua put his elbows on the table, leaning forward slightly. His otherwise silly and easy-going expression changed into a more serious look.

“Do his kids know?” He asked. “They’re suspecting it, but I don’t think they understand it.” You sighed. “I know, it’d be weird for them…”

“Not just them,” he reminded you. “If any of the other kids find out - let alone their parents - it could get very complicated, you know?”

“I know.”

“I’m not telling you to stop seeing him. You deserve to be happy.” He sighed. “But sadly, you have to be careful with it. You never know what might happen when others find out, and they will. More importantly, if it doesn’t work out, it can be hard on the kids.”

You took a deep breath as his words settled in your head. You hadn’t even considered what would happen if you ended up breaking up. Joshua’s words would stick with you through the rest of your much lighter conversation, and for the rest of the day, it would chafe in the back of your mind. For the rest of the week, you barely talked to Mingyu. Partly because he was busy getting over his cold and then catching up at work, but also because you were ignoring him. Sometimes you’d see his call and let it go to voicemail. You texted from time to time and let your excuse for not talking to him be the preparations for the play on Friday.

A part of you still thought that he might show up to the play, for the girls' sake, of course, even if it was naive of you to think. You didn’t even see Mingyu at pick-up. With the amount of work he had to catch up on, he didn’t have time. His parents would pick up the kids instead. Friday, the day of the play, was spent making preparations for the afternoon - when all of the parents would come to see their kids perform. It wasn't anything particularly well-made, it was made by kids, after all - but the work that the kids had put in truly made you proud. The morning of the play, you asked Jiu and Ari if they knew if their dad would come after all. They had confirmed your fears of him most likely not coming at all. Despite them putting up a brave front, you could tell it made them very disappointed. You sat down with them backstage to make sure that they were okay.

“Why don’t I act as your grown-up for today?” You suggested. “Then you’ll still have someone watching you.”

“It’s not the same,” Ari said.

“You’re a teacher. You have to watch all the kids,” Jiu added.

“I’ll tell you what.” You looked around before shuffling a little closer to them. “If you promise not to tell anyone, I’ll promise to pay extra attention to you two.”

It seemed to cheer them up. they even made you pinky-swear on it. However, you knew it wasn't as good as having their actual parent there - so you were determined to make Mingyu at least see the few last minutes. When everyone was in their costumes and had prepared for the play to start, you took your seat right by the stage. You saved a chair next to you, putting up a fake "reserved chair" sign on the seat. Before the play started, even before the parents had started coming in, you pulled out your phone and called Mingyu. As the phone was ringing, the nervous feeling in your chest started growing.

“Hey, sweetheart.” He sounded tired.

“Hi… um…” You took a deep breath. “I know that you’re busy, and the play starts in twenty minutes, but the twins… They really want you here. I tried cheering them up, but I don’t think it worked.” You heard him sigh and shuffle around. The sound of papers and other office supplies getting moved around could be heard over the phone. A door opened, and you heard mumbling.

“Cancel my next meeting, please,” Mingyu said with the phone held away from his face. “I have to go see my daughters’ play.” You heard more talking from the other person and a door closing.

“I’ll be there,” he said. “Give me fifteen minutes.”

“Thank you, honey.” The nickname just slipped out. You hardly noticed it. “I’ve saved you a seat at the front.”

“You got me front-row seats? Wow, you really know how to spoil a guy.” Mingyu naturally fell into his flirty tone. Joshua sat down beside you on the chair that you hadn’t put a piece of paper with “RESERVED” written on it. With the sudden interruption, you couldn’t bring yourself to answer with the same flirty tone. You could hear Mingyu walking into the elevator on the other side of the line.

“Just be here, Mr. Kim…” you murmured.

“Mr. Kim!?” Joshua whisper-yelled, hearing you despite your attempt to hide it. Joshua leaned in closer to try to listen in on the conversation, and no matter how far you leaned away from him, you couldn’t get away.

“Mr. Kim?” Mingyu questioned. “No more ‘honey’? Have I done something wrong?”

“I have to go…”

“Y/N.” He sighed. “I know something’s wrong. You haven’t talked to me all week.”

“It’s nothing, Mingyu,” you hummed.

“But it is,” he argued. “Listen, we’ll talk later… I’m glad you called, sweetheart.” The two of you said goodbye, and you hung up. You don’t dare look at Joshua, but you can feel his gaze burning a hole in your skin.

“He calls you sweetheart?” He whispers.

“Joshua,” you warned.

“You guys are cute…” he mumbled. “Is everything okay, though? You’re okay, right?”

“... I haven’t talked to him in a while.”

“Y/N, no…” he whined.

“You’re the one who told me to be careful!” you exclaimed.

“I told you to be careful, not to ignore the poor guy!”

“Keep it down!” You hissed. You knew that if people found out that you used to sleep with one of the parents of the children you educated, suspicions of special treatment would arise even if they had no real claim.

“Seriously, Y/N. You should go for it with him. He seems good for you,” Joshua said. The parents started coming in before you could say something in response. His words stuck with you yet again, and you were struck with the realization that you had been a paranoid jerk. Your eyes were completely focused on the door, smiling at the occasional parent you would make eye contact with, but your main goal was to see Mingyu walking through that door. All the parents had settled down and were talking amongst themselves.

Fifteen minutes felt like hours, and you were still impatiently looking back to the door now and then. The lights dimmed. Mingyu still wasn't there. A teacher came out on stage to present the play. Mingyu still wasn't there. The parents clapped after the teacher's short speech, and as he walked off the stage and the music started, Mingyu came through the door. You happily waved to him, and he sprinted toward his seat just as Ari and Jiu walked out on stage. He gave them two thumbs up and a supportive smile before sitting down.

“Thank you,” Mingyu whispered in your ear. You wanted to thank him, too, for coming despite all the trouble, but the kids had already started speaking.

At the end of the play, you stand by the door and watch all of the families walk out - praising the kids and thanking the parents for coming. Mingyu is still in his seat, happily talking to Jiu and Ari. You glance over at him from time to time, a big clump of worry stuck in your throat. You had ignored him for days. Would he still want to stick around? All you wanted to do was wrap your arms around him and tell him how much you cared for him, but you couldn’t. As the last family left, Mingyu started walking towards you. Joshua, who was standing on the other side of the door, gave you a thumbs-up before leaving. Mingyu walks up to you, his face somewhat colder than it usually is.

“We have to talk later.”

“I know.”

“I’m dropping the kids off at their grandparents’ house,” he said. “Could we meet up after?” “Sure. You can come by my apartment whenever you have time.” You clasped your sweaty hands together behind your back.

“I’ll text you,” he hummed. The small family walked away, the twins happily saying goodbye to you before running to the parking lot - blissfully unaware of the strangling feeling of guilt in you.

After pacing around your apartment for at least ten minutes, you got a text from Mingyu saying that he was on his way. Your heart was beating fast in your chest. In less than an hour, this could all be over. Taking a deep breath, you tried to calm down your racing heart. Every moment of your time with Mingyu flashed before your eyes. He could irritate you and make you worry, but in the end, you were the happiest you had ever been when you were with him. Even in the beginning of your relationship with Wonwoo, you hadn’t felt this way. If fate existed, this was it. You loved him, and you had realized it far too late. What anyone else thought didn’t matter. You wanted to be with him. A deep blue wave washed over you, your entire body going slack as you took another deep breath - this time, it reached into the deepest corners of your lungs. You felt refreshed as if simply admitting to yourself that you truly did love him had made you a new person. You loved him, you loved him, you loved him… the words echoed in your mind. Nothing had ever been so clear to you.

When your doorbell buzzed, Mingyu’s voice sounded over the intercom, asking if you could let him in, and you did so without hesitation. The few minutes it took for him to finally come upstairs were hell for you. You were waiting right by the door, expecting his knock at any moment now. His knuckles only met the wooden door once before you ripped the door open. Meeting his shocked gaze brought back the clump in your throat. He looked tired - hurt even. You had done this to him, and you’d do anything to fix it.

“Come in.” You stepped to the side and let him inside.

Mingyu walked inside, took off his shoes, and followed you into the kitchen. You were quiet and in desperate need to distract yourself with something. Looking back at him in the bright kitchen light, you could see the bags under his eyes more clearly now.

“Do you want coffee?” you asked.

“I just want you,” he rasped.

His arms hung by his side, his entire body standing completely still. You looked down at your feet, trying to stop yourself from crying - and if you couldn’t, you at least wanted to make sure that he didn’t see you cry.

“Are you sure?” you questioned. “I’ve been… I haven’t been very good to you, Mingyu.” Mingyu took a step forward, now standing right in front of you. One of his hands grabbed yours while the other lifted your chin to make you look at him.

“I’m sure.”

“What if I’m not good enough for you?”

“You’re more than enough for me,” he assured you. “I just… adore you. I can’t imagine my life without you in it.” You brought your hand up to his cheek, cupping it in your palm and letting your thumb run over his cheekbone. Bringing your other hand to the back of his head, you pull him in closer for a kiss. As your lips met, Mingyu put his arm around your waist to pull you closer to his body. Fireworks exploded in your stomach as if it were the first time all over again. The kiss didn’t last long, your lips parting with a soft sigh rolling off your tongue. Your eyes stayed closed for a moment, still feeling the ghost of Mingyu’s plush lips against your own. When your eyes opened, you saw Mingyu looking right back at you.

“Please, never scare me like that again.” He leaned his forehead against yours. “When you stopped calling, I thought I had done something to upset you.”

“No, not at all,” you murmured. “I was… scared. I wasn’t sure of what to do next. You and I were doing well, but… what about your kids? If this ends, what will happen to them?”

“This won’t end.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.” Mingyu put his hand over yours, which was still holding his face, and turned his head slightly to press a kiss to your palm.

“I’m in love with you,” he mumbled against your skin before turning back to look at you. “I haven’t felt like this in a very long time. I’ve been on many dates since my wife died, trying to pick up the pieces, but it always felt like something was missing. When I met you for the first time, I felt like you were the missing piece… and when I found you again, it felt like fate had given me a second chance. So, I don’t care about what your coworkers think when they see us walking the kids to school together. I don’t care what other parents would whisper about if they saw me kissing the teacher before the parent-teacher meeting. And I definitely don’t care about who you used to be with - even if we go to the same meetings.”

You let out a soft chuckle at his words, your hands falling to his shoulders. Even if he was joking, his words comforted you - so did his gentle hands on your waist. Your shoulders relaxed, and no more tears were threatening to spill onto your cheeks.

“Are we clear?” He asked.

“Yes.” You nodded, giving him a big smile.

“Good.” He pulled you in a little closer. “... can I kiss you again?”

“Please do.” Your whisper was almost inaudible. You barely got the words out before his lips were on yours again. The warmth from his hands on your waist burned through your clothes, leaving your skin tingling. His hands moved slowly around your body as if he desperately needed it to last as long as it could. Your chest was pressed against his now, your arms lying on his shoulders and your hands in his hair. His long, romantic kiss turned into short, sweet pecks along the corner of your mouth and down to your jaw.

“Gyu-” You tried to interrupt him, but it was useless.

Mingyu continued his attack on the rest of your face, giddily kissing whatever surface of your face he could reach. Laughter, like silver bells, echoed in your small kitchen, a place that’s been previously filled with anxious mumbles about the man who was now in front of you. He paused, looking into your eyes, giving you a smile that you recognized easily as his mischievous and flirty grin. He bent down slightly, gripping the backs of your thighs as he muttered, “Jump”. You did as he said, wrapping your legs around him as he lifted you up - you put your head in the crook of his neck. Without worrying about it, you let him carry you over to wherever he wanted to take you. The woody scent of his cologne was intoxicating, and you tried to bury your nose deeper into the soft skin of his neck - Mingyu let out a chuckle at the tickling feeling.

“I’ve been thinking about getting you all to myself ever since I made you breakfast last Monday,” he admitted.

“You have me now,” you murmured.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You lifted up your head from his neck, pressing a soft kiss on his lips. “Bedroom?”

Mingyu grinned, taking long steps toward your bedroom door. Before you knew it, he had thrown you on the bed - crawling over to you to finish what he had started. The two of you had been there for what felt like hours. Mingyu’s movements were soft and slow, thrusting in and out of your dripping pussy. You were delirious, wanton moans escaping your lips every other second. Mingyu’s mouth was latched onto your chest, sucking dark marks on your skin. His body was pressed against yours, your legs wrapped around his waist, keeping him there.

“I’ve missed this…” Mingyu groaned. “I’ve missed you.”

“Gyu…” you whimpered. “Please, just a little faster.” For all this time, Mingyu had kept the pace slow - his excuse was that he needed to take his time with you, which you accepted… for a while. Now, you were suffering - simultaneously overstimulated and not stimulated enough.

“Why won’t you let me take my time?” He pouted.

“I have,” you answered. “I need to cum, Gyu, please- I want you to cum inside me.” Mingyu swore under his breath, his hips stuttering at your words. When he was distracted, you managed to flip the two of you over. Being on top gave you control of the pace, and, despite your burning thighs, you immediately started bouncing on his cock.

“Sweetheart-” He gasped. While the pace had been kept slow earlier, the overstimulation made you sensitive enough to feel your orgasm approaching already from the sudden change of pace. Mingyu felt the same, evident by his stuttering hips and loud whines.

“Cum inside me, Gyu,” you urged him again.

“You’re going to be the death of me…” Mingyu soughed. Mingyu grabbed your hips to thrust up into you. Your head lulled to the side, your limbs growing limp, as a wave of pleasure spread from your core to the rest of your body. His hands gripped your sides harshly, bruising the skin, and kept you pressed against his pelvis as he came inside you. You could hear him say something, but you were lost in your paradise. As you were about to slump over him, Mingyu handled you carefully to lay down on his chest - putting his hands on your back and rubbing patterns into your skin.

“Are you feeling okay, sweetheart?” he whispered in your ear, and you hummed in response. “Do you want me to draw you a bath?”

“No, it’s okay,” you murmured. “Just stay here with me.”

“We should clean up,” he said, and you whined at the thought of having to move. “I’m serious. And you should go to the bathroom.”

“Stop being so responsible…” you groaned.

“Can’t help it.” He sat up, bringing you with him. “I like taking care of you.” Mingyu stood up with much effort, making sure that your legs were wrapped around his waist. He carried you over to the bathroom, despite your constant whining. After cleaning himself up, he left you to your privacy - but not long after, you walked out of the bathroom again to go back to bed. Mingyu was already there, waiting for you under the covers. He pulled the covers to the side, making it easier for you to get in. As he wrapped the covers around you, you snuggled up against his chest. His skin against yours felt like heaven, and you got as close to him as you possibly could.

“Gyu?” You murmured.

“Yes, darling?” He answered with a playful tone.

“Thank you.” Your words floated in the air. Mingyu stayed quiet but wrapped his arms around you a little tighter. He pressed a kiss on the top of your head, his lips lingering there. Your hands went to his back, feeling his muscles under your fingertips - smooth skin, but you could feel knots there, probably caused by stress. You could picture yourself helping him massage out those knots, him laying with his stomach on his bed, you straddling him and gently moving your hands over his back. The fact that you could picture flashes of your future together felt promising. You felt safe in these daydreams.

“For staying,” you added.

“I know,” Mingyu murmured against the top of your head.

“Promise me something?”

“Anything.”

“That if I ever start doubting us again,” you said, “you'll tell me off like you did today.” Mingyu’s chest rumbled with a laugh, and you broke out in a small chuckle at his response.

“I promise,” he said. “Is the sex afterwards included?” You hit his chest with your palm, just lightly, and hid your flustered face against him. Mingyu only kept laughing, clearly enjoying your embarrassed state.

“Shut up,” you muttered.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ A year later, you’re teaching your last class of the day when the bell rings. The students pack up their things as you remind them of next week’s homework. Soon enough, you’ve picked up your things and are walking down the hallway to Mr. Hong’s classroom. The doors opened, and the many kids ran past you to get out to the courtyard where they could meet their caretakers - Fridays were always hectic. You spotted Joshua in the classroom, and he gave you a smile and a wave.

“Are they here?” you asked as you walked inside.

“We’re here!” the twins shout happily. “They did exceptionally well today!” Joshua praised. “Ari’s figured out multiplications, and Jiu’s reading gets better every day.”

“I’m glad to see the two of you working so hard, even when you’re not in my class anymore!” you told the girls before turning back to Joshua. “I hope you have a good weekend, Mr. Hong.”

“Mhm, have fun playing newlyweds with your man,” he teased and went back to a few papers on his desk.

“We’re not even…” You sighed and turned your attention to the girls. “Ready to go home? Pick up your things, let’s go meet your dad!”

Jiu and Ari were running ahead of you as soon as they saw their dad. Mingyu was standing by the gate, talking to another parent who was also picking up their kid. You recognized them from your parent-teacher meeting last year. As soon as Mingyu heard the happy shouts of his daughters, he excused himself from the other parent and crouched down with open arms. The girls ran into his arms, almost making him stumble back in the process. You caught up to them just a few seconds later, giving the other parent a nod before they walked away to their kid.

“How are my princesses doing?” Mingyu asked and kissed their foreheads.

“Good! I finished another book!” Jiu grinned.

“And Mr. Hong said I was good at multiplication!” Ari added.

He congratulated them both before standing up to take a look at you. His smile widened, and he opened his arms for a second time. You walked into his embrace, giving him a short hug. However, as you tried to pull away, he held you a little bit tighter.

“Mingyu, people are staring,” you whispered.

“Let them,” he whispered back. “I’ve missed you, sweetheart.” You finally managed to pull away, but Mingyu’s hands lingered on your waist - you let them stay there, knowing that he would only start pouting if you tried pulling them off.

“You saw me this morning,” you reminded him.

“For way too short of a time,” he added.

“Darling, you almost made us late.”

“Details…” Mingyu scoffed and turned his head away from you. When he glanced at you through the corner of his eyes, he got to see your bright smile. Proud of his achievement, he grinned as he turned his face toward you again. Before you could tell him to go get the girls’ names crossed off the list, he stole a kiss from you.

“Gyu-”

“Go tell the teacher that I’ve picked the girls up, I know.” His smile was contagious. “Just needed to tell you that you look beautiful today, Mrs. Kim.”

“I’m not Mrs. Kim yet,” you remind him.

“You’ve been Mrs. Kim in my mind for a while now, sweetheart,” he argued. “Besides, you’re about to put the last of your furniture in our house, and my kids call you mom. The papers are nothing but a formality at this point.”

“Fair enough,” you murmured. He took your left hand in his, his thumb grazing over the ring on your ring finger. His hand lingered on yours as he walked to get the pick-up finalized, only letting go when his arms couldn’t stretch any further. The girls followed after him as he walked up to the teacher with the name list, standing in the middle of the courtyard. As soon as it was done, Mingyu grabbed the girls’ hands and led them back to you.

“Ready to go home?” he asked, unaware of the fact that you were already home as soon as you had seen him. You nodded, taking the lead toward the gate. Mingyu was still holding the girls’ hands, so you opened the gate for them and watched them walk out. A few kids said goodbye to you, and you took some time to wish them a good weekend. When you turned back to your small family, they had already gotten to the car. He had parked close to the school, so it wasn’t very far, and you quickly jogged up to them. Mingyu had managed to get the girls into the car seats by himself, closing the car doors just as you arrived.

“You’re always so busy,” Mingyu joked.

“Says you,” you countered and went to fix his crooked tie. “You took the weekend off, right?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He grinned. “Ready to serve.”

“It’s just invitations, Gyu.”

“You say that now…” Mingyu opened the car door for you, putting his hand on the edge of the entrance to make sure you didn’t hit your head. When you had sat down, he carefully closed the door behind you and walked around to the other side of the car.

“You’re the one who agreed to help me,” you argued.

“And I won’t complain,” Mingyu said as he sat down in the driver’s seat. “Promise.”

You looked over at him as he buckled his seatbelt. His tedious behavior was enough to make you frown at him. Mingyu looked at you as he started the car. He gave you a charming smile - a classic Kim Mingyu distraction. It worked, as it always did. You sighed and turned back to the girls.

“Are you two okay back there?” you asked, and the two of them nodded before going back to their whispering. As Mingyu backed out of the parking space, you turned to sit normally in your seat. Mingyu put his hand on your leg as soon as the car was on the road. The warmth from his palm radiated through your clothes. You put your hand on top of his.

“I don’t think making invitations will be very fun,” he said, “but I’ll enjoy spending time with you.”

“Just don’t try to distract me,” you warned as you intertwined your fingers with his.

“No promises.” He looked over at you with a mischievous spark in his eyes. You scoffed and looked out the window. Your hand was still holding his - he brought the back of your hand to his lips, leaving a chaste kiss there. A smile crept up on your lips as Mingyu put your hand back down.

“You’re ridiculous.”

“I love you too.”

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doitforbangchan · 8 months

Text

All Bark and No Bite

Chapter 1

It's here! This is the first chapter of my first real fic here on tumblr! I am not the best writer so please be kind :')

Series masterlist

Alternate Universe SKZ!

Chan x reader (y/n) x ot8

Previous - Next

Summary: There's no turning back now, not when you know what you left behind. A dangerous situation now replaced with another. After the omegas disappeared you have to extra careful, especially now that you have left your pack and family. What happens when your car breaks down on another pack's land?

Series Warnings: Fem reader, Smut, verryyyy nsfw, chan x reader, OT8 x reader, A/B/O, m/m/f smut, possessive! SKZ, possessive! Reader, anxiety and depression, fluff, angst, virgin!reader, cursing, violence, pet names, dom/sub dynamics, Sub reader x mostly dom SKZ, misogyny and sexism, Ateez are depicted as terrible people (sorry Atiny!)

Chapter warnings: Angst, anxiety, reader is VERY sad, minor violence, cursing, A/B/O (pls let me know if I missed any!)

MDNI 18+

Wc: 2400 ish

Disclaimer: The names and faces used here are just that, names and faces, and in no way reflect the real people the characters were designed after. The views and actions of these characters do not reflect the real Stray Kids in any way shape or form. This is all for fun let’s keep it that way please.

You should have known better. All those hushed conversations your parents have been having, all the phone calls your father excused himself to take, even the trip to your packs doctor for a very extensive physical. None of it set off your mental alarm bells and that made you feel so stupid. But how could you have known that your own parents, the people who raised you and were supposed to have your best interest at heart, were planning on selling you off to the highest bidder once you became mature enough.

That's life for omegas these days, though. After a worldwide virus a few decades ago, omegas just stopped being born. The virus wiped the gene out almost completely, leaving a very small percentage of omegas left. Unluckily for you, you happened to be the only omega born in your area in the last 40 years. That made you highly sought after by alphas, especially dangerous ones.

Your hands were still shaking. It had been hours since you escaped your parents house in your car, yet you couldn't get your hands to stop shaking with the immense adrenaline you’re feeling. You had no plan, no money, nowhere to go and no one to help you. Your only friend, Ash, was a beta girl in your pack and as much as you liked her you knew she could do nothing to save you now. At least your car had a full tank of gas, the only good thing your father had done for you was allow you to drive to Ash's house on occasion.

All the adrenaline was starting to wear off as you drove, the realization of what this would mean for you and your life now starting to sink in. The constant looking over your shoulder, the uneasiness you will always feel, it was almost too much to handle. No. What would have been too much to handle is letting that filthy man get his hands on you. Kim Hongjoong.You had heard about the things that alpha had done to claim power over his pack. From sabotage to murder, none of it was good. From what you could gather he was on the search for an omega to complete his pack and somehow had heard whispers about you. The only known omega within a few hundred miles. He wanted an omega to raise his children and help him lead his pack and would do anything to get his hands on one; whatever necessary.

You imagine the sum of money he offered your parents was just too good for them to pass up on. Your alpha father was too proud to accept anything less than a hefty amount. Your mother was an omega through and through. Obedient and submissive to her alpha. Just as she raised you to be. She herself was a rare omega. Though back in her day the omega population wasn't as low as it is now. Now the numbers have fallen to less than 0.2%. Your mother molded you into the perfect little doll. Almost. Never in your wildest dreams did she or your father imagine you, their doll, would be disobeying and running from all you had ever known, yet here you are. That's what real fear does to a person. Fight or flight. All your life you had been all bark and no bite. Now this is your way of biting back.

All you had to your name was this old car (technically your fathers), an old backpack with a few changes of clothes, and couple cans of spaghetti o’s. Luckily this car had an old map in the glovebox. Better than nothing especially since you had no gps and no phone. You knew better than to take the main roads. Your pack would undoubtedly be looking for you and the car. Back roads it was then.

You couldn't tell exactly how many hours you had been driving at this point, too caught up in your mind to really pay attention to the time but by now it had gotten very dark and you found yourself on this old road going through a small town in the woods. You vaguely remember passing through the small community about half an hour ago. Of course you hadn't stopped in the town in fear of being noticed or recognised somehow. But now you’re wishing you had stopped at that little gas station and at least tried to get an ounce of gas with the spare change left in the middle console. The car was officially running out of gas. In the middle of nowhere. Just your luck.

“Are you serious?” You asked no one with tears starting to fill your eyes.

Feeling the difference in the vehicle causes you to pull off to the side of the road with a groan. You know it won't be going any further with the way it just gives up there on the side. Turning off the car and leaning your head against the wheel you let out a light sob. This wasn't the life you had envisioned for yourself. Once upon a time you thought one day you would meet your true mate, a caring alpha who would love you for you and want to make you happy. Seems as though that was just a fairytale after all. Even your parents weren’t true mates. They just settled for each other. You knew you couldn’t let that be you. You wouldn’t settle, especially not for a vile man you didn't love.

It was too late now to leave the car. This is where you will be staying for the night. Good thing it was late spring and not winter or you would freeze out here. Once your tears have slowed and the sobs have ceased you took a deep breath to calm yourself.

“You will be ok.” You repeat to yourself a few times. “You will be ok. You will be ok.”

Will you though? It didn't matter. You had to be. With one last sigh you locked the doors and climbed into the backseat of the old car. Its seats were worn and uncomfortable but it somehow felt comforting. It felt like the last remaining bit you had from childhood. When things were simple for you. Were things ever that simple as you remembered it being though? Before presenting as an omega when you were 16 things were definitely simple. You had assumed along with everyone else that you would be a beta and go on to have a normal life. Sure sometimes you were a little agreeable and always had a gentle nature, but you had just thought you took after your mom in that aspect. Little did you know you would take after her in a different way. It wasn’t until you presented that it made sense to the pack why you were that way. It was then that the looks began from other pack members. The way their eyes would linger on you a little too hard. The way their nostrils would flare when you entered a room. It made your skin crawl thinking back.

From that point on there was no more public school for you. You were homeschooled the last few years of high school for your protection. “We're doing this to protect you not punish you, Y/N.” your father had said when he forbade you from going back to school. “You can't trust anyone these days. Not around an omega.” He was right. The thought never crossed your mind that you couldn't even trust your own parents. You wished you had been born a beta like your sister, or even an alpha like your brother. Being the youngest out of three you figured you would be like them.

The worst part was you didn't have the suppressants you had been taking since you were a teen. They were almost impossible to come by normally, but your father had somehow gotten his hands on a steady supply and had been forcing you to take them. Another thing that was for your protection. To keep alphas from detecting you by scent. You hadn't taken any this morning before you left so you imagine your scent was going to start leaking out for any one nearby to smell. Great. Another problem for tomorrow.

Adjusting yourself on the seat to lay down as much as you could, you closed your eyes and focused on your breathing. It wouldn't be long before sleep overcame you. The exhaustion of the whole ordeal catching up with you.

__________________________________________________________

The sun peaking through the trees awoke you from your surprisingly restful slumber. It seemed to be early morning if the dew on the windows was any indication. Peeking out the window you saw nothing around. Not even any animals. Perfect. You slowly unlocked the door and crept out quietly shutting the door behind you. Taking careful steps a few yards into the thickets ahead of you and relieving yourself helped you feel a little better. You made your way back to the car and took a second to breathe. In and out. In and out. The air was crisp and refreshing and helped you clear your head.

Now feeling a little better you noticed how bad your stomach was growling at you. Reaching into the trunk of the car you pulled out a small can of spaghetti o’s. Not your first choice of a meal but when you panic you grab what you figure will be easiest to take with you. Plus you could use a can as a weapon if needed!

Eating was the last thing on your mind yesterday, but now you knew you could no longer put it off. Popping a can open and taking a seat on the hood of the car with a spoon you dug into the food. It was….. food . Cold and disappointing but at the same time satisfying as you had an empty stomach.

There you were, sitting there on the old car contemplating your next move from here with now a half full can of disappointment, when you catch a scent in the air getting stronger with each passing second. It was another person, no it was people. More than one.

Fuck

You have been found. Whether by the packs that were after you or by a stranger it didn’t matter all you felt was terror.

There was no time to flee. Before you could even move from the hood you could feel a pair of eyes on you to the right of you. You twist your head to face the eyes that are peaking out at you from the trees ahead.

The stranger takes a tentative step towards you and comes out from hiding and you immediately go into fight or flight.

With an alarmed shout “NO”, you launched the half full can of spaghetti o’s at the intruder, hitting him square in the chest and sending the cold contents all across his shirt.

“What the fuck?!” the possible assailant yelled.

Spotting another figure approaching the first one you threw yourself back off the hood and onto the ground, then as quickly as possible you yanked the door open to the car and jammed yourself in locking it immediately. You made yourself as small as possible as to not be seen by them but you knew the damage had been done. There was no way out of this. No gas in the tank and even if there was you had no idea where your keys had gone.

You could hear them talking but you were too frightened to pick up any of the words except girl, mess and Alpha. Now you really felt terror. Without realizing how close they had been to you, you let out a shriek when there was a sudden knock on the window next to you.

Not daring to look at them for even a second you yelled through the glass “Please go away! Please please I don’t deserve this!” tears filled your eyes.

__________________________________________________________

The smell of your distress was making Seungmins and Jeongins eyes water. They had never experienced such a powerful scent before. Not even the odor from the Spaghetti Os covering Seungmins shirt would distract from the one coming from within the vehicle. The beta wanted to be mad that she had pretty much assaulted him, but at the same time couldn’t find it within himself to care much given how much pure terror he smelled coming from the young woman. The omega.

The young alpha Jeongin felt similarly now that he had eyes on her he felt this overwhelming urge to protect. He had never encountered one before and honestly thought he never would but now that he was laying eyes on her he felt his alpha side perk up. A part of him never wanted to stop looking at her.

Honestly the boys didn’t know what to expect when they came out here to investigate the scent that had appeared on their land late into the night. They truly didn’t expect the cause to be an omega girl that was holed up on the side of a path.

Seungmin tried knocking again, a little more timid this time so as not to frighten her more. “Excuse me, we could smell your distress. Do you need any help?” He asked slowly.

You spared him one quick glance then shrunk into yourself again. “No thank you, please go!”

He sighed and stepped back a few feet to look at Jeongin in amazement at the situation. Giving him one small nod he said “ We need to call Chan.”

__________________________________________________________

What felt like hours, but was probably only a few minutes, passed and you stayed in your same position. The boys had remained there but not so close to the car anymore to which you were thankful. They were quietly mumbling amongst themselves, no doubt about an omega being caught out here alone. Every so often you would move your head just slightly to peer over at them. You hadn’t noticed before in your initial panic but they were pretty cute young men. A beta and an alpha from what you could tell. Even covered in your thrown breakfast (a shame about that really) they still managed to carry themselves proudly. Though your smell is causing their faces to scrunch up, you could tell it was taking it's toll on them.

Not even a moment later after taking another look at them you could feel the change in the air as another pair of people was approaching. Not just anybody was coming this way, it was an Alpha. A very strong one at that. The smell was starting to permeate all of your senses and was quickly becoming intoxicating.

You could sense him before he even appeared. No matter how intrigued you may be though you can’t show weakness.

‘Keep your head down and wait it out’ you kept telling yourself like a mantra.

You knew he was approaching your door. It took everything in you to remain still. Then as if struck by lightning you felt your body alight like it never has before.

“Omega..”

(A/N: Please do not steal my writing and content! Reblogs and comments are encouraged tho 😙once again i would LOVE to hear your thoughts and theories! This has not been beta read all mistakes are my own.)

©doitforbangchan

TAGLIST

@ihrtlix @realrintaro @meowmeeps

#stray kids x reader #skz smut #bang chan #lee know #changbin #hyunjin #han jisung #felix lee #seungmin #jeongin #ot8 x reader #skz ot8 #skz abo #omegaverse #stray kids #abo #dom chan

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livlaughloveluke · 4 months

Text

ᡣ𐭩 𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗳𝘁 𝗽.𝟭

child of dionysus x luke castellan 🍷

IN WHICH… the man you hate just can’t seem to leave you alone

warning! this fic contains- swearing // alcohol mentions // shitty parents // use of y/n // angst // daddy issues! // spoilers to tlt // probably not book accurate // implied sex!! // no actual smut, but definitely heavy illusions to sex (both characters are 18) // loss of virginity // drugs (medicinal) // blood // reader wears a swimsuit?? // reader gender isn’t mentioned i think // mentions of death/drowning // ends on an cliffhanger!!!

[a/n]-we’re just going to say tlt takes place in 2005, so luke and will have been born in 1986. also, incase you didn’t know, Hera doesn’t have any demigods, so her cabin is empty :)

part two is in progress, just wanted to put something out until then. also kinda ends on an odd note because it wasn’t intended to be multiple parts

🎧- night shift by lucy dacus

6.6k words (oopsies)

You hated Luke Castellan above all else.

Coming from you, that was a pretty bold statement, considering that you had a fiery hatred for plenty of things. Whether it be people who smacked their gum too loudly or ignorant gods who brushed off their children with no remorse, everything seemed to unwillingly ignite a spark in you. However, someone in particular really seemed to piss you off.

The mere sight of his stupid curls and even stupider scar hadn’t always awakened such a burning rage in you; in fact, he used to do the opposite. He was fourteen when you first met him.

April 13th, 2000

Luke had been placed into the chaos of Cabin 11, the other campers unfazed by a new demigod living with them as they carelessly bumped into his shoulder while playing tag. Old magazines scattered the wood floors, and dust covered the edges of his scrappy bed. With a sigh, he threw his bag onto the floor and escaped the overwhelming sensations provided by his siblings.

The light tour Chiron provided was seemingly useless as he mindlessly waltzed down to the lake, unsure of another quiet space to go to. He performed a quick glance around to ensure he was really alone, and then plopped down onto the rocky shore with a groan. Without his father and now Thalia, he wasn’t sure if he’d survive a night at this bullshit camp.

“You okay?” You emerged from the woods, staring at him with a concerned expression. He jumped slightly, startled by your presence since he literally just checked to see if he was alone. “Oh, uhm, yeah.”

“Wanna talk about it?” You asked, noticing the way his tone was so unconvincing while sitting down next to him and staring out at the view. It wasn’t typical of you to be so welcoming, but you had recently received dessert privileges back after getting them taken away for punching some Aphrodite girl, so a cheery mood was accompanied. He glared at you, slightly annoyed by the way you interrupted his moment of peace. But then again, you weren’t really bothering him, so he figured you could stay. You were also breathtaking, so how could he shoo you away?

“No.” Luke replied honestly after a moment of silence, a slight grimace decorating his features while thinking about his long past.

“Fair. I’m sorry about your friend.” You said, your voice filled with empathy rather than pity as you kept eye contact with the horizon despite the cooling wind that turned your eyes glossy and ruffled your neon orange shirt. “Thanks.” He muttered as the memories flooded his mind, to the point where he had to clench his teeth together so he wouldn’t cry.

“I’m Y/N. Child of Dionysus.” Turning around, you offered a friendly smile until you realized he had his head buried into the crook of his elbow and emitted gentle sniffles. “Oh shit, I’m sorry. Did I say something? I’m trying to work on it, I swear-“

“Does it ever get easier?” He interrupted, although his request came out muffled as he whispered into his skin.

“Well… sorta.”

“Sorta?”

“You get used to the whole Greek God thing, I guess.” You reply, avoiding the question he was clearly implying about his father being present. It wasn’t one you typically liked to talk about, along with most of the other campers with daddy issues. The truth was, you hated the gods for abandoning their children, but speaking out about that would have some brutal consequences. Let’s just say you would lose more than just dessert privileges for a week.

“I’m heading down to the bonfire; you should join.” You said after another long pause of silence, standing up and dusting the particles of sand that had collected on the bottom of your denim shorts.

“Okay.” He stood up, wiping his eyes, and followed you as you hiked through the trees.

“So, why were you stalking me again?” Luke spoke up with a sarcastic tone, stepping over the large tree trunks that had fallen down onto the forest floor.

“Woah, I was not stalking you, newbie.”

“Sure looked like it when you magically appeared out of the woods.”

“Well, I wasn’t, okay? Mind your business.” You snapped, the caring facade slipping away as you stared at him harshly enough to pierce his heart.

“Jeez, sorry.” Luke looked down at his feet, feeling a little guilty for being too pushy with practically a stranger. After seeing his suddenly reserved body language, you stopped the hike and faced him.

“Don’t apologize.”

“What?” His gaze averted back up to meet your cold expression.

“Don’t apologize. I was being a bitch. Stand up for yourself.”

“Uhh..” Luke was now extremely confused, looking around as if this was some sort of prank show with the way you switched up so fast.

“Let’s try again. I’m gonna say the sane thing, and you’re going to stand up for yourself. Kay?”

“I don’t-“ He started, but was quickly interrupted by you.

“Well, I wasn’t, okay? Mind your business.” You repeated from earlier, making your voice sound even ruder as you dramatically exclaimed.

“N-no? Is that what I’m supposed to say?” He questioned, still nervously glancing around and searching for some sort of explanation or another person hiding in the undergrowth to reveal it was a silly joke. You raised your eyebrows in disbelief at his terrible performance, blinking slowly as you scoffed.

“Oh gods. It’s not what you say; it’s how you say it. Be more confident.” Stepping back, you repeated the sentence again. “Well, I wasn’t, okay? Mind your business.”

“No.” Luke said, this time with more pride, although he kept staring at you for a sign of approval. “Good!” You supportively with a grin, turning to continue your walk. And after a sassy eye roll, Luke followed behind.

“Just trying to protect you from the Ares kids. They can be assholes.” You happily explained, a little too cheery for someone who just snapped at him.

“Yeah, okay.”

Luke knew he should be bothered by your interesting behavior. I mean, most would, but deep down, he liked how you were empathetic in such a strange way. It made him feel human, instead of like a tourist attraction that people whispered sweet nothings to and stared at curiously.

“Don’t take anyone’s shit, and soon enough you’ll be swimming in kleos.” You stated, swaying with every step and providing plenty of hand gestures.

“Kleos?”

“Glory. Everyone here is basically fighting to be respected.”

“Oh. Shouldn’t everyone just be respectful?” He obliviously asked, ducking under a low, hanging branch.

“They should, but they aren’t. But with glory, it makes you important. People sit up when you walk in the room; stay out of your way; things like that.”

“Wait, so I just have to stand up for myself, and suddenly I’m all important?”

“Sometimes. Usually, though, you have to major in some skill. Archery, sword fighting, healing, etc. You been claimed yet?”

“Yeah, Hermes.”

“Oh.” You replied, dissatisfaction noticeable.

“Oh??” Luke questioned, offended and sounding a little more rude than he intended.

“It’s not really a bad thing. Just different demigods are usually good at certain stuff. With Hermes, they typically tend to be good liars.”

“What’s your talent?” Luke asked, causing you to go quiet for a minute while thinking.

“Well, I’m really good at poker. That’s about it.”

“You’re a good talker, too.” He said, causing you to shoot him a threatening glare.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I mean, you give decent advice, and you’re pretty welcoming. That’s a plus.” He instantly backtracked.

“Half of the camp would disagree with you on that. Turns out hostility doesn’t get you the best reputation.”

“You’re hostile?” Sure, you may have had a little anger management problem, but hostile? You seemed sweet enough to Luke, at least.

“I don’t talk to all the newbies like this.”

“Then why me?” Luke, from his understanding, wasn’t special. He didn’t stick out. He wasn’t super hot, smart, or funny. He was just average, in his opinion.

“Dunno. Why not?” You said, which wasn’t entirely true. He just seemed different, like he was hiding more beneath the surface. Similar to a puzzle that you needed to solve, except if you didn’t, you’d be burdened with a painful itch of curiosity for the rest of eternity.

“Hm, Fair. But what should I try to achieve kleos?”

“Don’t go for archery or healing; the Apollo kids will smoke you. Maybe sword fighting? I could show you the basics sometime.”

“Sword fighting it is.”

May 21st, 2001

"Where were you during arts and crafts?" You asked while sitting down next to Luke at lunch, clearly irritated by his absence during this morning's activities.

"I was-" He tried to explain, but you had already taken his hands and begun to inspect them, your touch shutting him up. You huffed in annoyance while gently tracing over his callouses and cuts.

"You were training again."

"I just needed more practice. I didn't mean to-" He started, feeling remorse for not showing up, but you were there to quickly interrupt him.

"Save it. I have bandages back at my cabin; let's go. It's the least you can do for leaving me with your siblings all morning." You slammed your hands on the table, standing up and practically dragging Luke to follow you (he would have followed even if you didn't force him).

Once a long distance away from the pavilion, you brought up a topic he wasn't the most comfortable with. "Training to prove yourself?" He swallowed back his anger, not wanting to lash out at you, despite the fact that you could obviously take it.

"Maybe I am. Who cares?"

"I do. Stop caring about the gods so much."

"Easy for you to say. Your father's here." Luke mumbled mockingly under his breath, barely above a whisper, but you heard.

"I'm not sure he even knows my name. He's a drunk dumbass, not exactly great dad material." This shut him up, his gaze traveling to the dirt floor until you reached Cabin 12. Silence and tension filled the air as you opened your backpack, scouring for the gauze and anticipatant. Gripping his wrist with a rage-filled force, you carefully rubbed the Neosporin over the red cuts and wrapped his palms with the stretchy material gifted by an Apollo friend.

"Don't say I don't care about you. You know I do." You whispered, breaking the quiet atmosphere and filling it with fiery love.

"But he doesn't."

"So?"

"He's my father. He should."

"You should stop focusing on what you don't have. Working yourself to the bone won't improve your relationship."

He didn't respond, not having an argument or a sassy comment whipped up, because you were right. He manufactured this mindset that if he was good enough, if he had glory, Hermes would finally notice him and would finally love him. However, there was always a little voice in the back of his head that made him doubt all of his hopes for a family. You just amplified that voice like a microphone.

"And you left me alone with your brothers. Bleh." You smiled, trying to lighten the mood a little while tying off the first bandage.

"C'mon, they aren't that bad."

"You should have heard how they were talking about Julia from Aphrodite Cabin."

"Ew." He laughed, looking at you while you concentrated on wrapping his last hand. You looked so stunning like this, with your pearly teeth peeking between the skin of your lips and your eyes squinting while focusing on making sure it was perfect. He was truly a dumbass, focusing on the gods while you were right in front of him. "Done." You said while tucking in the end of the gauze. He hinged his hand open and shut a few times to make sure it was sturdy, and of course it was.

"Thank you." Luke praised you, not just for patching him up, but for caring.

"Anytime. Hey, I made you something during arts and crafts." You dug through your plastic junk drawer, clinking around all the junk in search of something specific.

"Hm?"

You snatched up a small beaded necklace from the drawer before extending your hand and showing it to him. It was crumpled up, the flimsy string intertwined with itself and the beads out of order, so he picked the jewelry up and awed at the handmade piece. It was wooden beads painted in deep burgundy paint with your first name spelled out in Greek letters, strung on black elastic.

"It's gorgeous." Was all he could manage to utter out, still starstruck by the thoughtfulness of your gift.

"Thanks. We should probably get back to lunch before it's over." You replied, and for the first time in Luke's year of knowing you, you look flustered. You nervously glanced down at the laces to your shoes and fiddled with your fingers, even swaying from the tips of your toes to the back of your heels.

"Yeah, yeah." He agreed, slipping the necklace on and walking out with you behind him. For the rest of the day, he was all smiles and giggles, with others unsure of why he was in such a good mood. Until the inky night sky swallowed the bright blue light, and nightmares came with it.

Most demigods were prone to the occasional bad dream, but Luke was a frequent victim of Hypnos’ curse. Every other night was filled with images of losing what he loved, but he was too embarrassed to talk to someone about it, so he suffered silently.

That night, the dreams were particularly horrific, to the point where he awoke covered in sweat and probably some tears, too. His mind debated whether or not sneaking out and waking you up was a bad idea, but the thought of staying awake alone in his bed another minute scared him more than any profanity you could throw at him for interrupting your “beauty sleep.”

Tiptoeing silently outside the hot cabin, his heart pounded as he traveled to your room next door. He was still in flannel pajama pants and an old tee shirt with some vintage band plastered on it, the chilling wind erupting goosebumps.

Luckily, your bed was right next to a window, which he promptly (and quietly) tapped on to wake you up. A few groans and twists later, you slid open the glass and gawked at him.

“Luke, what the fuck are you doing?” You whisper-yelled, praying to the gods none of your siblings woke up and started bitching.

“I had a nightmare.”

“You woke me up at two in the morning because you had a nightmare?”

“Please, I just need someone to talk to.” Hearing the desperation and seriousness in his voice, you couldn’t possibly reject him, no matter how tired you were.

“I’ll be out in a second.”

Sliding the window shut, you slipped on some sandals and exited to see Luke, who was standing on the porch.

Walking down the steps with him tracking behind, you waited until you were isolated by the lake to talk. “Everything okay?”

“I don’t know. I’ve been having really bad nightmares lately, and I know that sounds stupid, but I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“Have you tried talking to the Apollo kids? It’s not rare for them to deal with insomnia.”

“Well, no. It’s humiliating. It’s taken me a year to talk to you about it, and you’re my best friend.” Luke skimmed past the term ‘best friend’, unsure if you felt the same. It was stupid; you were definitely his best friend, but what if he wasn’t yours?

“First of all, it’s not. But I don’t mind talking to them. I can say I’m having nightmares, and they’ll probably give me melatonin, and then I can give it to you.”

“You’d do that? Smuggle drugs for me?” He spoke softly, the moonlight enchanting his features.

“Course. You’re my best friend.”

December 27th, 2002

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You yelled at Luke in the empty Hera Cabin, angrier than ever. Word had spread to you like wildfire of a quest Luke had accepted, despite the fact it was a suicide mission.

“Listen-“

“No! You told me you didn’t care about the god’s approval anymore. And now you’re going on some bullshit quest?! You’re a fucking dumbass.”

“I just need one chance to prove myself to him.” He pleaded, begging for you to understand and forgive him, even though he knew you weren’t the “forgive and forget” type. Honestly, he was about 80% sure you were still holding a grudge against him for stealing the dessert off your plate three months ago.

“Why aren’t you happy where you are? You’re the best swordsman at camp in three hundred years; half the girls here are in love with you, and everyone practically worships the ground you walk on!”

“I don’t care about them.”

“Do you not care about me, either?” You spoke softly, which was a dramatic shift from the heated yelling a few seconds ago.

“What? Of course-“ Luke cared about you more than anything— more than himself or any silly god. It wasn’t very far-fetched to assume that he even loved you, although his anxious self would never admit anything of the sort. But this quest was a dream of his, and it wasn’t possible for him to just give it up.

“Whatever. I’m done with your bullshit.” You cut him off and stormed out, leaving him to watch you walk away with an aching pain in his heart. That wound was left open as he set out for his journey that night, along with two other campers who were slightly underqualified.

The quest went to shit the minute they left camp’s solace, with monsters attacking from every direction. However, he and his companions were able to make it to the guarded tree with only a few minor injuries.

Until Luke reached for the golden apple and was sliced by the dragon who protected the fruit. Blood gushed out of the cut that decorated his eye as he stumbled away. The loss of blood and shock caught up to him, and eventually he lay in the arms of his friends, fading in and out of consciousness.

The idea that your life flashes before your eyes when you're near death is indeed true. Memories of previous years flooded his brain, from his childhood to his teen years (which mainly consisted of you). As the light faded away, all he could think of was how he never admitted his love to you and how your last interaction with him was an argument.

The next time he awoke, he was in the camp infirmary, dazed as he slowly blinked the sleep away from his eyes. The teenage nurses yelled at him as he slowly stood up and deliriously walked outside, but he couldn’t care less. He just wanted to see you and apologize. His near-death experience was a wake-up call, a sign that what he was feeling towards you wasn’t just friendly admiration.

Luckily for him, you were waiting for him outside, sitting on a wood bench as you anxiously bounced your leg. As he stumbled out the door, you immediately stood up and rushed towards his weak body. What caught him off guard was the way you hugged him instantly, wrapping your arms around his torso while burying your head in his chest. For the first time in days, you were able to breathe, inhaling his musky scent rapidly. The fight had taken a toll on you. You lied awake at every night scared out of your mind that he would die hating you.

“I’m so, so sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things, I was just angry at you for leaving me, but-” You rammbled into the cloth of his shirt, the vibrations on his skin making his heart flutter.

“Don’t apologize.” He said with a loopy smile, making you laugh with relief while remembering the first time you met. His original plan of confessing his love to you the moment he woke up with a dramatic spiel was immediately thrown in the trash as he looked at you from above. The worries of ruining this magical friendship you had spent two years building overtook the joys of the possibility that a new relationship would blossom. So for now, he was comfortable being friends with you. Best friends.

The stares from others went unnoticed, Luke too enchanted by your warming touch to see the way others gawked at him from afar, like he was a monster. Not until the next day, when he wasn’t drugged, at least.

When he looked in the crowded bathroom mirror the next morning after plenty of rest, it almost scared him. His gash was a beaming red with dried maroon blood on the edges and a violet hue discoloring the nearby skin. Swallowing nervously, he did his best to clean it up with warm water before rushing to the picnic tables for breakfast, where you sat munching on cereal.

“You’re the most brutally honest person I know. How bad is it? Like, can I even show my face anymore?” He blurted out, causing you to glance up with a slight panic. After a few seconds of consideration, you replied.

“It makes you look badass.”

“Are you sure?”

“Definitely. Go get something to eat and come back to talk to me.” Luke responded with a nod, heading off to grab a quick breakfast. With a tray of pancakes in his hand, he returned and sat down across from you.

“So?” You waited eagerly for some explanation of his trip.

“It went like shit. You’re right, I’m not good enough.”

“Woah, I never said that.”

“You implied it.”

“That’s not what I meant. I meant you shouldn’t rely on your successes or failures to determine your worth.”

“Same thing.” He retorted with a scowl, stuffing his mouth with food.

“Not even close. So, what’d you learn?”

“That I need to train harder.”

“Holy shit, you are a dumbass.” You said with a long blink and a theatrical sigh.

“Can we talk about something else?”

“Sure. How’s Annabeth?” Annabeth and you were always so different, but somehow that made you closer. She spent her hours strategizing and acting like an adult, and you spent yours playing games and wishing you were younger. Regardless, she was like a little sister to you.

“She’s… like usual.” Luke replied with a crinkle of his lips.

“Mm, so she’s still forcing herself to be an adult at nine?”

“Yeah, just about.”

“We should get her to play poker with us one night. Help loosen her up a little.”

“Not a chance.”

March 19th, 2003

You and Luke stood side by side, anxiously waiting for Capture the Flag to start, while Chiron yapped about the rules. You’d already heard the whole spiel of instructions multiple times, so naturally you grew bored, and your mind wandered off to the boy beside you.

He looked like a true warrior, with his pointy metal helmet that somehow sharpened his features. Over the past few summers, he had grown significantly, and the puff on his cheeks had thinned out. Needless to say, he wasn’t short of admirers.

You painfully watched as hundreds of girls fawned over him and even began to dread getting ready in the bathroom because of how many praises were thrown at him.

Luke sensed your annoyance from afar, although it wasn’t hard to notice by the way you scowled every time someone approached him with a new compliment. However, he thought you were just envious of the praise he received. In reality, you felt threatened, like someone would steal your spot in your best-friend-who-sometimes-flirt-with-each-other relationship with him. He would never let it happen though, even if you weren’t aware.

“Let the games begin!” Chiron yelled, snapping you out of your daydreaming session.

“You take the east side of the forest, I take the west, we meet up in the middle, right?” You wanted to confirm the Athena cabin’s strategy with him, to which he replied with a quick nod.

“Mhm. See you on the flip side.”

“See you on the flip side, Castellan.” You both turned to the different small groups that you were leading, setting out on foot to start your plan.

Annabeth and a few other geniuses had spent the past two weeks carefully crafting a flawless plan for today’s Capture the Flag game. You and Luke would attack, traveling into their side of the woods, while the rest would defend.

While you might not have been the best swordsman, you were a master of trickery and deception and decent at fist fighting. Plus, you had a solid team backing you up.

“So basically, we just need to fight some of the red team and then meet up with Luke and his group in the middle. Kay?” You instructed to your acquaintances, who diligently followed behind you as you hiked through the evergreen trees, until you saw a few of the other team lurking around. With a surprise attack, you were able to defeat them, with little of your squad lost in the process.

You kept on trekking through the dark depths of the forest before spotting some of the best members of the red team, specifically Sam from Ares cabin.

They were the biggest asshole around, and extremely cocky for someone who was the second-best sword fighter in camp. Plus, they were always trying to get in your pants, along with every other counselor who was old enough. To be frank, they were super hot, but you weren’t interested in anyone currently. Well, anyone who wasn’t Luke Castellan.

Knowing you wouldn’t win this battle, you shuffled to the bushes and silently watched while thinking of a good plan.

“Nice try. Up. Slowly.” Sam said unexpectedly, causing you to sigh with frustration and calmly stand up, along with your teammates.

“So, you can either give up now and save yourself the trouble, or we can do the whole fighting thing and eliminate you that way. Your choice.” They stated with a smile, only egging you on.

“What a little bundle of joy you are.”

“Hm, okay, fighting it is.” They sliced for your stomach, the metal of their blade clinking with the iron of your breastplate. You were stunned at first, but immediately charged back while his goons attacked your friends.

The sound of swords slicing and heavy grunts filled the woods, alerting Luke, who was a decent distance away. Most of his teammates had been eliminated, so now it was just him and one other member. He lightly jogged to the scene, not caring too much.

Meanwhile, your group was putting up a solid fight, but so were they. You clashed swords relentlessly with Sam, while your teammates suffered a bloody battle. In a mere minute, all of your team had surrendered, but so had all of Sam’s team.

With every second that passed, your efforts got messier and energy your got lower, and it was apparent this wasn’t going to be your victory. With one clean slice, Sam nicked your arm violently, and you let out a scream in response. Unbeknownst to you, Luke heard your pain and panicked, changing his pace from a careless jog to a speedy sprint. His partner yelled at him, confused, but Luke just kept going, despite his muscles that ached like fire.

You grew exhausted, now just weakly defending yourself from every attack. Seeing how unfocused you became, Sam took this opportunity to swipe your feet with his leg and send you tumbling to the ground, disarming you in the process.

Both panting heavily, they shakily brought the blade to your neck and stepped on your torso to prevent less squirming.

“You’d be a lot hotter if you weren’t such a bitch.” They said, and before you could come up with a witty reply, Luke had charged from behind. Slicing at Sam with adrenaline-fueled anger, he instantly knocked them down to the floor.

“Don’t ever talk to them like that again, or I’ll seriously fuck you up. Okay?”

“Okay, Jesus! What are you, their boyfriend or something?”

Luke wasn’t sure how to reply, so he didn’t. Was this too protective of him? No, he was just helping a friend. Right?

“Just say you surrender already.” He mustered up.

“Fine, I surrender.” Sam mumbled, and Luke took his sword away while they fled. Then, he turned to you, who was watching the whole thing from the floor.

“Holy shit, thank you.”

“Anytime, sweetheart. They hurt you?” He replied with a grin, helping you up with his right hand.

“Nothing bad.” You responded, twisting your arm to get a glance at the cut. He winced with empathy while grabbing your wrist so he could get a better glance.

“Ouch. Go to the infirmary. It’s bleeding a lot.”

“Whatever. Go get the flag, trooper.”

You didn’t have to tell him twice. With a sly salute, you both headed your separate ways. Luke had a pep in his step as he jogged to the bright flag, forgetting all about his partner, who was somewhere in the trees far behind him.

You headed to the nurse, getting it cleaned and patched up easily before setting off to the lake. Sitting on a pointy rock, you waited mindlessly for this stretched-out game to end. Technically you were still in, but your match with Sam was enough fighting for the day.

Luckily, you didn’t have to wait long, because Luke emerged from the forest a few minutes later carrying a gleaming red flag with pride.

Standing up, you cheered with excitement as you ran up to him, squealing like a little girl. He stopped in front of you and dug the pole into the rocky shore with a grin. Still in awe, all you could manage out was a toothy smile in reply.

“Congrats, Castellan.”

“Eh, it was no big deal.” He joked, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“Whatever. Bonfire tonight!!” You laughed and made sure to yell out the last sentence for all of your teammates, who whooped with glee.

When the sun drifted down the horizon that night, you and dozens of campers headed down to the shore, where a sparking fire raged. The flames danced as you sat around, scattered on different logs. You currently sat on the floor next to Luke while he sat on the wood, leaning your back against the dead tree and ever-so-slightly brushing up against his legs.

Everyone had noticed your change in attitude over the last few years. You seemed bubblier and more happy because, well, you were. Falling in love with someone who had a chance of reciprocating feelings was heaven. Every long stare from across the room and gentle touch made your skin crawl with adoration. Maybe you should tell him. But why ruin everything?

As the night stretched on and the violet sky dissipated into a jet black that was freckled with stars, you grew sleepier. And after the third yawn in only ten minutes, you decided it was time to hit the hay.

“Okay, I’m calling it quits. Night guys!” You stood up before turning to Luke.

“Goodnight, Luke.” You whispered in such a caring tone that he felt shivers down his spine. Speechless, he watched with hearts in his eyes as you walked away.

“At least try and be discreet.” One of his friends laughed as soon as your figure went unseen.

August 2nd, 2004

“Absolutely not. No way!” Annabeth yelled at you.

You, Luke, and her all sat on the floor of Cabin 12 playing Uno because apparently gambling “isn’t appropriate for an eleven-year-old.” The problem was that you liked to make up your own rules, while Annabeth strictly stuck to what was written in the instructions.

“Beth, everyone plays this way! Just take your six!”

“If your friends jumped off a cliff, would you?” She gave you her signature death stare.

“What are you, my mom? Luke, what’s your opinion?”

“Do not drag me into this.”

“I quit. I’m heading down to the lake, you guys wanna come?” You stated, slamming your mountain of red cards onto the floor and jumping up to search for a bathing suit in your dresser.

“I have archery training.” Annabeth said, grabbing her stuff and walking out.

“I’ll go.” Luke replied a little too eagerly.

“Okay. Meet me at the docks in ten?”

“Sure.” Using his bandaged palms to push off the wood floor, he left to go change.

Slipping into your black swimsuit, you threw a baggy shirt over it and skipped down to the shore, where Luke was waiting with his feet in the icy water.

“Hey.” You alerted him of your presence while sliding off your cover and tossing it down beside you. His breath hitched, and he couldn’t help but gawk at the slivers of your exposed skin. Nervously swallowing, he weakly replied. “H-hey.”

Ignoring the way he stuttered and stared, you jumped into the cool lake. The blue water engulfed you in a refreshing embrace, rolling off your skin as you emerged from the surface.

“I’ll race you to that buoy over there.” You pointed to the white float that bobbled up and down.

“Deal. Winner gets loser’s dessert for a week.”

“Deal.” You took off before he was even in the water, pushing off of the wood dock to accelerate forward.

“Cheater!” Luke yelled playfully before jumping in and following your path.

Eventually, he caught up and even reached the buoy first, grinning triumphantly as you paddled towards him.

“I hate you.” You mumbled, but the beaming smile plastered on your face told another story.

“Fine, you can keep your dessert privileges, but I still want bragging rights.” He offered, not caring a smidge about anything but making you happy.

“Gods, you’re such a good person.” You said, knowing you would have taken his food and flaunted on him for the next seven days.

“Race you back?”

“Fuck no. I’m tired.”

“I’ll carry you. The waters not too deep; you can sit on my shoulders while I walk.”

“You’ll drown.”

“I’m pretty ripped; I think I can manage carrying you one hundred yards.” He jokingly replied with a flex of his bicep, which was definitely appreciated by your wandering eyes.

“Sure. I’m not saving you if you do end up drowning, though.” You climbed onto his shoulders, and he gripped your calfs to help stabilize you and because he really just wanted an excuse to touch you.

“That’s a pretty badass way to die.” He said while trailing through the fresh liquid.

“To die while swimming through five-foot-deep waters?”

“Well, not when you phrase it like that.”

“How would you phrase it?”

“Glorious hero meets his fate at the lake with another counselor’s thighs wrapped around his head.”

You both froze with shock when he uttered his suggestive remark, even Luke not realizing his mistake until after. He felt his cheeks go hot and nervously tried to apologize for making you feel uncomfortable.

“Oh my gods, I swear I did not mean-“

You cut him off with a deep and angelic laugh, clearly not hurt by his poor choice of words.

“You’re a dumbass.” You choked out through heavy giggles, and he instantly relaxed upon realizing you didn’t think he was a complete pervert. Every laugh you released was like a weight off of his shoulders, and that was when he knew he could not shove his feelings down anymore.

Hours had passed, and you two ended up watching the sun fall by the lake while sharing a cherry red and white striped blanket. Not a word was whispered as you rested your head against his shoulder, his curls dripping onto your skin. He couldn’t help but smile as he felt your slow inhalation of the crisp air.

Once night arrived and the cicadas started chirping, it was finally time to break the comforting silence.

“I’m gonna go shower.” You said while slowly standing up and letting the towel drape off of your body.

“Me too.” Luke replied, getting up and placing the towel back on your shoulders so you wouldn’t have to brace the chilling breeze in a swimsuit. As you walked away, he couldn’t help but stare.

“Wait, I need to talk to you once you’re done. Meet me in the Hera Cabin after we’ve showered?” He called out after you, to which you nodded in response.

He needed to confess how he felt about you immediately, or his chest might actually explode. He needed to tell you about how his heart raced every time your touch lingered a second too long, how he ranted to Annabeth every night about the things you did that made him swoon, and how he was madly, head over heels, in love with you.

Once the musk of lake water had fully washed off, you headed to the infamous empty cabin, where Luke was waiting. His hair was still wet from the shower, causing his curls to separate, and he fidgeted with his fingertips while anxiously waiting for your arrival.

“You okay, Castellan?”

“No, I’m not, actually. I need to tell you something, like right now.” He stuttered out, his lip crunched up like he was in pain.

“You’re scaring me a little, but I’m all ears.”

“I love you.” Luke blurted out, the tension in the air increasing significantly with just three words.

“What?” It seemed as if the world had stopped, even the birds quieting down for a listen.

“I’m in love with you.” He repeated, like it was no big deal, like it was second nature.

“You love me?” You whispered out, almost like it was unheard for you to be loved.

“More than anything.”

You swallowed, thinking for a second while he awaited a response.

“I love you too.”

With the conformation of your words, he leaned in until the tips of his nose rubbed against yours. His lust-coated eyes flickered from your eyes to your lips, making it apparent what he wanted. Luke breathed in your fresh scent heavily while watching and waiting for a reaction—for you to pull away or do something.

Trailing a hand up into his hair, you delicately pushed his head until your lips met. His skin was honey-sweet as you gingerly kissed; it looked like something out of a romance movie. He forced himself to be a gentleman and pull apart after a few seconds, no matter how much he wanted to kiss you until his oxygen ran out.

Looking up into his eyes, you craved more. This built-up tension between you two was finally erupting, and it needed more than just a little kiss to be satisfied. So, you took charge and feverishly leaned in for more.

His hands cusped your cheek, carefully avoiding any boundaries you might have set up. That was until you snagged his bottom lip with your teeth, and he lost all self-control. The sweet kisses turned into a full-blown make-out session as he steadily snaked his hand down your torso and to the fat of your ass.

Only breaking for air when absolutely necessary, passion filled the atmosphere, along with hushed moans from the both of you. Luke warily trailed his hand upwards to your chest, and you could tell where this was heading. Panting, you removed your lips from his and spoke up.

“I’ve never.. I’m still…”

“Me too. Do you.. still want to?” He revealed, his heart racing while still daintily grazing your skin.

“Yes. Please.” You desperately nodded, like death was approaching if you didn’t continue. With that, he laid you down on the squeaky mattress of an unused bunk bed and hovered over.

“Gods, you look stunning.”

୨୧

part two in progress…

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kpopfanfictrash · 1 year

Text

Elemental (M) Pt. 1

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Genre: Second Chance Romance / Modern Fantasy

Pairing: Jungkook / Reader (she/her)

Synopsis: Fear has never been a foreign concept to you. Your entire life has been shaped by the knowledge that you’re different, and fear of the stigma which might follow discovery. Although fire, earth, air and water Elementals have been public for decades, the fear-mongering around your kind hasn’t changed; something you have intimate knowledge of, having experienced it firsthand. Since then, you’ve done your best to hide your water powers. This is for your own safety, as your mom likes to say.

Safety flies out the window though, when you fall in love. Jeon Jungkook isn’t just any love, either, he’s the love. The person who makes you feel as though your darkest corners deserve to be seen. Unable to control your magic around him, you find yourself faced with a horrible fact: you need to break up.

A plan which proves difficult when Jungkook simply refuses to go. And maybe, just maybe, you find the constraints placed on yourself don’t make sense anymore.

Rating: 18+

Warnings: death of a parent (past), some emotional abuse

NSFW Warnings: oral (woman and man), multiple orgasms (woman), fingering, hand job, face-riding, sex outdoors (in a secluded, private area), very slight ass-play, breast play

Word Count: 17,287 (32,487 total)

Author's Note: Unfortunately, the new Tumblr text editor doesn't allow for more than 1,000 paragraphs per post. Part I is here, and Part II will be uploaded shortly. Please, please, please reblog both if possible! In my experience, engagement tends to be worse when split into two parts. (also, if you haven't already realized based on the premise, Y/N does break up with Jungkook in the first part of this fic lol so, if that's something you don't want to read; fair warning!)

[ Cross-posted to Wattpad here ]

Magic, to you, has never been a boon.

Despite its romanticization in movies and stories, the reality of magic is messy and unpredictable. As dangerous as it can be fickle, your mom likes to say. Usually followed by a glance in your direction, swift enough for you not to notice, although you always do.

Either that, or an unconscious tilt her chin towards the photograph on the mantle. You aren’t sure she even realizes she does it, acting on instinct alone. The photo is of your dad, holding you on his shoulders with an ear-to-ear grin. He was the other Elemental in your family.

Even with only one magical parent, the Elemental gene tends to be passed on to children. Your dad’s magic was water, skilled in manipulating and calling forth the element. He was lauded for it, which was in itself unusual. More often, Elementals are run out of town by other humans. Although time has gone by since societal integration, there are still many who view your kind with suspicion.

You can’t say that you blame them – not really. Because again, the reality of magic is it can be dangerous. Based on experience, bad things tend to happen when you lose control.

Head tilted, you squint through the fog at your boyfriend’s apartment. For centuries, fog has been heralded as an ill omen and maybe there’s some degree of truth to it. Maybe the first speaker lived near a temperamental water Elemental, unable to keep their emotions from manipulating the weather.

Thoughts souring at how close to reality this feels, you shake your head once and some of the fog clears.

A pep talk, you think. That’s what you need to convince yourself to enter. Unseasonably chilly this late in the summer, your fingers curl into the ends of your sweater. Going inside would be preferrable to standing out in the cold, and yet you can’t manage a single step.

Better to stand in the cold than enter and shatter.

Again, you remind yourself you’re doing the right thing and again, this doesn’t help. If anything, it makes you clutch your sweater tighter. For once, you wish doing the right thing meant what’s right for you. Exhaling deeply, your eyes shut as a train passes and shakes the ground.

You began dating Jungkook three months ago and within a week, you knew it was different. You have a tendency to hide pieces of yourself, knowing most people won’t like what they find. Jungkook never allowed that to happen. The first time you ghosted, he showed up at your favorite coffee shop the next morning and asked what had gone wrong. Taken aback, you responded honestly and to your surprise, Jungkook listened.

He stayed. Stayed when others had run, cementing himself on a short list of people you can trust. Three months into dating, things have moved at once fast and slow. Fast because typically, you exit relationships long before feelings like these ones develop. Slow, because you haven’t given Jungkook every part of yourself.

Physical intimacy comes to mind. On several occasions, this has proved… difficult.

Eyes opening, you stare at the door. Memories of last night rise to the surface. For a long time, you’ve known this relationship has an end date. Knowing this doesn’t prepare you for the difficult conversation ahead.

The last time you saw Jungkook was after midnight. Fat raindrops chased your footsteps while you ran from his place, descending the subway at a record pace. The look on his face remains stuck in your mind and even now, you find the thought hard to revisit.

Imagining hurting Jungkook again is unfathomable. Stifling a gasp, you spin on your heel and march away. Halfway to the gate, you get a grip on yourself. Coming to a stop, you remind yourself this isn’t about you. Jungkook will hate you – there’s nothing to do about that now. Now, this is about Jungkook and ensuring he’s safe.

Slowly, you turn around and make your way forward. In the name of procrastination, you stop at a trash can to clean out your purse. Old receipts, gum wrappers and a crumpled-up napkin shake into the bin. You pause at the napkin, staring at the embossed name of the restaurant you work at. Or – more accurately – worked at.

Slamming the trash lid, you turn. You began work at Pierre’s Bistro two months ago as a temporary measure. Ideally, you paint but lately, inspiration has run dry. Waiting tables pays the bills, leaving time at the end of the day to stare at a blank canvas.

Pierre’s is an upscale French restaurant a few blocks down with semi-decent food and waiting tables would be fine if the owner – Pierre – weren’t a massive asshole. Now that you don’t work there, you can be honest about that. Pierre was the most sexist, elitist, capitalistic piece of shit you’ve ever had the displeasure of working for. While on his payroll, you tried to make the best of it but now, you have nothing to lose. Pierre was a dick.

A point he proved yet again last night, much to your mortification. You prefer working the lunch shift to dinner, and weekdays to weekends. Saturday nights are worst of all, and last night Pierre didn’t arrive until well after six. You were forced to cover the entire front section, picking up for a co-worker who called in sick.

Rushing from the bar, you nearly crashed into your boss removing his coat. Grabbing you by the elbow, Pierre steadied you, his hand lingering.

“Whoa, where’s the fire?” he joked.

You forced a smile. Experience has taught you the best thing to do in those types of situations is to smile and laugh.

“No fire. Lots of customers! Excuse me,” you said and tried to move past.

Pierre didn’t release you. If anything, his grip on you tightened until you turned your head.

“Yes?” you said, impatient.

Pierre didn’t respond, looking you slowly up and down. Eventually, he released you to take a step backwards. “Nothing,” he said carefully. “Be careful out there tonight.”

Trying not to gag on his words, you moved on. Unfortunately, it was hard to escape Pierre’s notice once caught. From that point on, each of your flaws were held under a microscope. First, it was that you didn’t fold the napkins correctly. Next, you took a wandering path from kitchen to table. Each time you entered the dining room, scornful words were covered by simpering smiles.

By the time your shift end approached, you could barely keep going. A large group had entered and, seeing the host occupied, you took it upon yourself to seat them at your last table. Fixing your apron, you hurried through the restaurant and into the kitchen.

Grabbing another table’s dishes, you thanked the cook and pushed open the door. Immediately, arms shoved you back in. Startled, you barely had time to recognize the host, Vanessa, before the doors swung shut.

“Vanessa?” you said, adjusting your grip. “What’s going on?”

Harried, she glanced over one shoulder. “Sorry,” she sighed, curly hair slipping from her messy bun. “I wanted to warn you before you went back out. Pierre is pissed.”

Your stomach sank. “Pissed… at me?”

She nodded, another dark curl escaping. “Something about saving the table up front for his friends? Bullshit, yes,” she said at your expression. “But you know how he is.”

“Yeah, I know,” you muttered. Deciding there was nothing to be done but keep moving, you hefted your plates higher. “Okay, thanks for the warning. I need to get these to table ten.”

“No problem,” she said and stepped out of your way.

You walked inside with slightly less spring in your step. Pierre lounged near the bar, surrounded by a group of people you could only assume to be friends. Although you felt his gaze on your face, you avoided him the best you could while you made your rounds. Taking the long way to the kitchen, you passed in front of the window.

Which was the moment you noticed Jungkook waiting for you on the curb. He stood beneath a streetlight, light pooling around the ends of his dark hair. When he saw you approach, his face lit up and he smiled.

Cursing beneath your breath, you smiled back. You were supposed to be done a half-hour ago, but there hadn’t been a good time yet to stop. Waving back, you mouthed, just a minute, and frantically pushed through the crowd to the back.

Merely seeing his face lifted a weight from your chest. It was easy to be around Jungkook because he liked every part of you. You never felt the urge to pretend, to curve yourself into something someone else would find pleasurable.

Well, he liked every part except one – and you were working on telling him that.

Hurrying into the staff room, you forgot your plan to avoid Pierre. You nearly jumped a mile when a hand grabbed your elbow, spinning you to face your fuming manager.

Pierre stared down his nose. “Follow me,” he snapped, releasing your arm to spin around.

He passed tables full of patrons, leading you to the bar before turning. “Y/N,” Pierre said, his voice dropping. “Are things okay tonight?”

“Yes,” you responded, deciding one-word answers were safest.

“Then why, exactly, are you fucking this up?”

Your jaw tensed. “I wasn’t aware I was doing so,” you said carefully.

“The napkins?” Pierre made a tsk-ing sound. “How many times should I say that presentation is important? Not to mention your laziness. One of your tables had to flag me down to ask for a refill. And now, you gave away the front table.” His expression darkened. “What makes you think you, a fucking waitress, can step in for a host? You sat someone at the table I personally reserved for my friends!”

You shouldn’t have responded. You should have stayed quiet and yet –

“There was no name in the book,” you muttered.

“What’s that?” Pierre waited and, when you stayed silent, shook his head. “I hadn’t had time to write their name down, but I told Vanessa, who assured me it’d happen. Of course, she wasn’t taking into consideration Y/N, the wonder waitress! Taking everyone’s jobs and making them harder.”

At your sides, your hands balled into fists. It took a greater amount of concentration than normal to keep your emotions from spilling over.

Of course, there were explanations for Pierre’s accusations. The napkins were correct before he jostled the table. You had been circulating your tables and if you were unavailable, it was because of his poor staffing. Oh, and – he didn’t make a reservation for his friends.

Slowly, you exhaled and stuffed down the responses. Deep down, with other emotions and magic. Beyond Pierre, a glass trembled but once you relaxed, the water went still.

“I apologize,” you said, not meeting his gaze. “I’ll do better next time.”

Pierre sniffed. “See that you do,” he said, brushing past. Grabbing a beer from the bar, you heard his friends burst into raucous laughter. Apparently, your humiliation was entertaining.

Heaving a small sigh, you turned – and froze where you stood.

Outside, Jungkook stared into the restaurant with murderous eyes. Too late, you realized Pierre had pulled you in front of the window. Away from anyone dining, but in full view of anyone on the sidewalk. Like your boyfriend, who witnessed the entire spectacle.

For a moment, your emotions overwhelmed, and you felt magic crack the walls you kept hidden. Embarrassment crept past your boundaries. Humiliation. Fury. Stuffing everything back, you quickly turned to rush through the tables.

Jungkook’s gaze snapped towards you, his brow furrowing. Reaching the staff room, you paced up and down. Jungkook saw you. He saw Pierre’s outburst, which meant you’d have to explain. You’d have to explain to Jungkook – the only person whose opinion you cared about – why you allowed other people to walk all over you.

He’d start to ask questions. Questions like, when was the last time you really got mad? You’d have no good response. Not because you don’t get mad, because you do. But because you don’t ever allow yourself to act on the feeling.

Faced with the prospect of brushing him off, you buried your face in both hands. Your usual excuses wore thin in your ears.

Pierre isn’t so bad. It was a one-time thing. You promise you’ll talk to Pierre tomorrow.

None of it would be true, and you didn’t want to lie to Jungkook. People never understood why you wouldn’t stand up for yourself, but the answer was complicated.

Your last date said you lacked emotions, but you don’t think that’s it. Of course, you have feelings, but those feelings are buried beneath so many layers, they can be hard to see. It’s not that you don’t feel, it’s that you cannot.

When you feel, your magic reacts, and people get hurt.

That was the last part of yourself you kept hidden. Jungkook is normal and he doesn’t know you’re an Elemental.

You know that by now, you should have said something. Obviously, but the timing was never right. Twenty-five years old, and you still aren’t sure how to broach the conversation. Few people know what you are, so you haven’t had much experience with the explanation. Your magic isn’t something you use if you can help it.

Yet another lesson you learned from your mom.

Your dad, an Elemental, died when you were five. Before, you lived near the ocean on a flat strip of sand. Your memories from before then are faint, but whenever you try, you can hear his booming laugh. Can feel the salt sting your cheeks, your mom tossing you in the air while you spun around.

Everything afterwards faded. At five years old, a hurricane swept past the barrier islands and that, you remember. You recall your mom at the door, pleading with your dad not to go as he donned his jacket. You remember him holding her hand, kissing the top of your head, and saying he’d return soon. Not many Elementals lived in your area, and even fewer had water magic.

You recall the hours passing, stretching longer and longer until dawn approached. Flashing lights followed, a woman climbing from her car to speak to your mom. You recall the sound of your mom sobbing, the policewoman’s voice floating into the house.

The storm surge was stronger than expected, but your dad managed to divert the worst. He saved the town only to be hit by a bolt of lightning. Instant death, the policewoman said, her tone implying this might be a comfort. Chest tight, your fingertips dug into the railing. Comfort meant nothing when your dad was gone. The irony struck you even back then – your dad saved others, and no one came to save him.

For weeks following, your mom was a ghost. At first, neighbors stopped by to drop off casseroles and condolences. Soon though, their sympathy stopped, and the whispers began. You were young enough not to notice, too consumed by the enormity of your own loss.

Eventually though, you noticed something was off. Suspicious eyes followed you down the sidewalk. Mothers clutched at their children, hurrying them to the side of an empty street. One day, you traipsed downstairs and overheard your mom on the phone.

She sat at the kitchen table, facing away from the staircase. You paused on the landing, listening to your aunt’s voice blast on speakerphone.

“Nonsense,” she was saying. “Your husband was a hero, and anyone saying otherwise is cracked. He saved your town!”

“I know.” Your mom blew her nose. “But now, people are wondering if he caused the storm. They’re saying maybe he… made the hurricane. It’s this new mayor,” she said, frustrated. “He hates Elementals and keeps insisting our family orchestrated this to collect money. He says –”

“Oh, no.” Your aunt sounded furious. “Don’t you repeat a single word that hateful man says.”

“He has a point, though,” your mom said, her voice low. “Did you hear about Uniontown? A fire Elemental accidentally set their barn on fire. Nearly burned the whole town. Magic is dangerous. I tried to warn him, but he wouldn’t listen, and now –”

“When was the last time your husband lost control, though? Are you saying you think he caused a hurricane?”

“God, no!” You watched your mom straighten. “But there are people saying… awful things.”

“Some people aren’t worth listening to.”

“I know.” Wearily, she exhaled. “They’re talking about Y/N, too, though. Apparently, she caused a tidal wave at the pool last weekend.”

Hearing your name said out loud, you shrank back in the shadows. You weren’t aware your mom knew about that, or that she cared. Bobby Clemmons teased Judith Bryce about her hair until finally, you snapped. Bobby was swept to the other end of the pool, much to Judith’s relief. She thanked you repeatedly.

Bobby was fine, except for some water up his nose. From the way he carried on though, you’d have thought he broke his arm.

Your mother lowered her voice, as though magic was something to be mentioned only in whispers. For the first time, a sense of shame crept over you. Your dad had always been open about magic, though stern. Stern in his belief magic should help people, not hurt. Never once did your dad insinuate magic itself was the problem.

Magic is dangerous.

Your mom’s words on the phone sank in as, your head pounding as you turned around to run up the steps. Even at six, you felt panic. If magic was dangerous and you were magical – that meant you were dangerous, too.

Slipping beneath your comforter, you stared at your shaking hands. Rain hit your windows, snowballing your worry to full-on fear. By the time your mom rushed upstairs, you were rocking under the covers as a storm raged.

She helped to calm you down, got your magic under control and a month after, you moved far away from the sea. A version of yourself vanished as you passed the pier. Despite this, you felt instant relief at the thought of control.

You remember your mom smiling when you joined the highway. “This will be good,” she said, her voice cracking slightly. “A fresh start, away from it all. You can be whoever you want to be, Y/N.”

Except for the person you actually were.

Her meaning was clear, even if she didn’t say it out loud. At the time, you found the thought soothing. If you didn’t want to use magic, you didn’t have to. You never had to become your dad, who all your friends said had caused the bad storm. Even the news had turned against you.

Earth Elemental suspected behind San Raoul earthquake!

Jailed air Elemental claims innocence against onslaught of tornadoes!

Fire Elementals flee after string of arson!

Always the exclamation point. Always the lurid fascination that blame could be pinned on a single person. New rules were implemented in the house. No magic, except in your mom’s presence. This soon became no magic at all, but you didn’t mind. Whenever you did use magic, it felt wild, chaotic – the opposite of how you wanted to feel.

Your early years were marked by the struggle to conceal your powers. Years passed without incident and then, something would happen, and you’d have to move. Your mom never begrudged you, simply packed the house to travel to the next city. Each time, you promised you’d do better but by the time you realized school wasn’t for you, you had moved no less than six times.

Art was a risk, though one you found necessary.

Creation meant tapping into emotion, but you found methods of coping. Painting was the only place you loosened the reins on your magic, and so it became an outlet of sorts. A release, preventing your emotions from spilling into unwanted places.

There were other strategies, as well. Deep breathing. Counting backwards from one hundred. Focusing on one point, then on another until the magic calmed in your veins. Until you forgot the dangerous and destructive water around you.

Some people proved more reactionary to you than others. With some people, your magic responded so strongly, you were forced to cut them out completely. The first person this happened with was your best friend, Katrina. You were fourteen when she confided in you her family was fire Elementals. In response, your magic surged.

For a glorious summer, you practiced magic in secret. Each morning, you and Katrina bounded through the woods towards the far creek. You summoned great waves of water for Katrina to singe into mist. Everything was fine until late one evening, your mom caught you. She witnessed the combined magic and lost her temper.

Dragging you from the woods, your mom slammed the front door in Katrina’s face. She sat you down at the kitchen table, delivering a scolding you’ve never forgotten.

Do you know how reckless you were? What if a tree had caught fire? What if you altered the town’s water supply? What if someone saw and the next time a disaster happened, they blamed it on you – or Katrina?

Stricken by these very real possibilities, you promised not to do it again. Although you begged not to move, your mom packed the next day – your fastest exit ever.

The second time you cut someone out was after high school. Elliot was an artist, a quiet guy who dabbled with oils. He saw you painting one day in the park and silently set up his easel beside yours. This happened for weeks until he asked you out. Your ensuing romance was brief and sweet, and your feelings grew within a short period of time.

When Elliot told you he loved you, you dissolved into panic. You could feel how your magic responded, reaching for water that surged through his tiny apartment. Tossing on clothes, you stammered apologies and fled into the night.

For weeks following, it rained. Enough for the reporters to forecast local flooding. The fact terrified you – imagining people trapped on top of cars, small businesses flooded, the Red Cross called in to ferry locals to safety. It took your mom flying out to put you at ease, clearing the skies and regaining control.

Since then, you haven’t let anyone else past your inner walls. Until Jungkook.

Swallowing hard, you stare at his apartment and wonder if you’ll survive. Breaking up with Elliot is one of your worst memories and you only felt a fraction of what you do for Jungkook. Maybe you’ll conjure a hurricane, bringing the events of your life full circle.

Shutting your eyes, you rub at them dully. There’s no point in wondering what-if. You need to end it now, before things get worse. All day, you’ve gone over the facts and arrived at the same conclusion.

As expected, Jungkook was livid about Pierre last night. He wanted to confront your boss himself, although quickly backed off when he realized this was your battle. This though, turned to confusion when you said your intent to do nothing.

Although you tried the usual excuses, none of them stuck. Even if it was just once, Jungkook argued, it shouldn’t go unnoticed. You snapped slightly at this, insisting you’d deal with things in your own time.

Getting angry near Jungkook was peculiar. Suddenly, you became aware of the water around you. Thick, leaden pipes lacing Jungkook’s walls. Moisture that hung in the air, in the clouds – within his very veins. The thought terrified you, wondering what you might do accidentally.

Your panic must have been visible, because Jungkook instantly softened. Crossing the room, he pulled you into his arms.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured into your hair. “It’s just… I hate seeing you hurt. Of course, you know what’s best. I’m sorry I doubted you.”

His grip grounded you, enough that your magic dissipated, and that you realized a truth you’d hidden for some time.

You were in love with Jungkook.

No one in your life had ever been like him. Someone who was always in your corner, who protected you when they could and lifted up parts they couldn’t. Someone who liked everything about you – even the parts you weren’t brave enough to admit.

Studying his face, you tried to ignore the sudden ache in your chest. Even last night, you knew the inevitable. Memorizing his face, you tried hard to hold on. Jungkook’s slightly rounded nose, his full bottom lip accentuated by two piercings. Dark hair fell over his forehead; strong features contrasted by a soft gaze.

Jungkook watched you as well, and you wondered if he felt the same. Wondered why he’d commit you to memory, since you were the lucky one. He was the miracle, and you were biding your time.

Bending, he lightly brushed your mouth against his. Instantly, you melted. It wasn’t your first kiss and prayed it wouldn’t be the last, but something about last night felt different. Walking the two of you backwards, Jungkook pressed you against the wall and kissed you harder. His touch became desperate, one hand sliding beneath the lines of your blouse.

Your breath hitched at the brush of his fingers, delicious and warm against skin. His touch unknotted a hidden, tangled piece of your soul.

Ever since you met Jungkook, you’d held yourself separate. When you asked him to go slow in the beginning, he agreed. Touching was fine. Kissing was fine. Anything more, and you lost control.

About a month into dating, you met Jungkook at a bar and got tipsy. Three drinks in, you were frantically making out in an alley outside. Jungkook panted, “my place?” against your mouth, and you nodded. The journey back to his place was fast and slow, pausing in every dark place to drag his mouth to yours.

The second his door shut, you found yourself stumbling – into his bedroom, his bed, the confines of his heart. Shoes were discarded with every step, and Jungkook couldn’t seem to keep his hands to himself. You returned his fervor in spades, nipping his lower lip to watch him smile.

When he fell back on the bed, you saw his pulse quicken. Staring up at you, Jungkook watched your clothing disappear with a gaze so dark, it bordered on onyx. Climbing onto him, you resumed kissing with a newfound reverence. Eyes falling shut, you did your best to stay present.

Each brush of his lips was combustive, each touch of his hands filling you with sharp, pulsing light. And then –

The sink and shower in his bathroom burst on.

Startled, you pulled away and realized it had been you. Your magic had caused it, flooding his bathroom with water. Swearing under his breath, Jungkook scrambled out of bed to hastily turn off both faucets.

You sat there on his bed, heart pounding with fear. By the time he returned, you were already dressed and mortified. Jungkook was all apologies, certain he’d moved too fast, but you assured him he hadn’t. Anything that happened, you were an equal participant – too much maybe, although you didn’t say so out loud.

Lying in bed that night, you stared up at your ceiling. For a moment, it felt as though you were six and under the covers at your old house. Magic was dangerous. You would eventually hurt someone. Dread pooled in your stomach, recognizing the truth. If you couldn’t control your magic around Jungkook, you’d have to end things.

Heartache chased the thought, filling you with so much panic, you nearly drowned. Pushing this aside, you simply resolved to do better. To be better and keep both Jungkook and magic. This was simply another challenge; you owned your magic, not the other way around.

Thus, began the two best and worst months of your life. The best, since you’ve been dating Jungkook and the worst, because at every moment, you’re terrified of hurting him. Walking a line as thin as a razor, you’ve fallen in love while trying your best not to feel.

Until last night, you thought you’d been successful. Life was mostly under control, but then the Pierre debacle took place. Then Jungkook kissed you with such intensity, you forgot who you were and why you’d been holding back. Two long months of restraint and suddenly, you came undone at the seams.

Before long, you were again in his bedroom. Jungkook stripped off his clothes, bare skin pressing to yours with a searing intensity. Pulling you over him, a low hiss escaped while he kissed your throat. Even through his boxers, you could feel how hard Jungkook was. How badly he wanted this; a need you returned.

The thought of him inside you made you frantic. Pushing Jungkook onto his back, you straddled his waist and rocked forward.

Jungkook lay underneath you, his hair a dark halo. Suddenly, you could feel water everywhere. Magic, everywhere – it was in you, around you, in Jungkook’s walls and molecules. Everything felt so utterly fragile, and your magic responded.

Ferocious, it strained at your self-crafted bonds. Realizing how precarious your grasp on control was, your emotions slipped into panic.

You had to leave. Now.

Sensing the change in your body, Jungkook paused.

“I – I’m sorry,” you blurted, scrambling off him. Bending for your pants, you pushed one leg through and hastily zipped. “I need to go.”

Jungkook stared, frozen in place. “I…” Shaking his head, he pushed a hand through his hair. “What’s going on? Did I do something wrong?”

Stomach dropping, you roughly shook your head. Part of you ached to correct him but your magic was barely leashed, and you weren’t certain how much longer it’d hold.

Your magic wasn’t something you wanted Jungkook to see.

Frantically throwing on your shirt, you rushed towards his front door. His dog, Bam, whined from the couch and lifted his head as you passed. Yanking open his door, you escaped to the hall and downstairs. You heard Jungkook call after, but he didn’t follow, for which you were grateful.

Remembering his face broke your heart as you entered the subway. You kept your magic at bay until reaching your building, at which point rain swept the city in waves. Soaked through, you got in the elevator and saw Jungkook had texted. Shaking, you responded you’d talk to him tomorrow and turned off your phone.

Rain poured all night and you barely slept. By the time you woke, your mood had gotten worse. Work was torture. Even the lunch shift couldn’t save you, the looming specter of Jungkook impossible to forget. When Pierre showed up around one, you knew you were doomed. His glower could be felt all the way across the restaurant and no matter what you did, you somehow stayed in his way.

With little to no sleep and haunted by last night, the grip on your magic was tentative at best. Your entire shift, it hovered at the edge of your fingers. When Pierre commented you looked tired, the rain outside worsened. When a table of middle-aged men called you ‘girlie,’ their water glasses shook.

It was miraculous nothing happened until the end of your shift. That was the moment Pierre’s friends arrived, seating themselves at the table you gave away last night. One of them laughed as you poured them water, and you managed to push down your snide remark.

Glasses full, you turned around to go and the same one grabbed your waist.

You went still.

For so long, you’ve hidden your magic to protect others. You’ve kept them from hurting and there you were, broken, and no one cared about you. Just like no one cared about your dad, in the end. Teeth gritted, you whirled – and the entire water pitcher dumped itself at him.

At him, not on him.

You didn’t trip. Didn’t throw the water, although either would have been preferrable. Instead, the water leapt from the pitcher to slap the man in the face.

Horrified, you stared as reality sunk in. You had just assaulted a guest – a friend of Pierre’s, at that.

Shocked, the man wiped water down his visage. The entire restaurant fell silent, every eye in the room locked on you. Panic-stricken, you stammered an apology, flung a napkin on the table and fled into the kitchen.

The moment you crashed through the doors, you were hailed a hero. Izumi, your line cook, wistfully recalled the one time she punched a guy who grabbed her ass. Georgina added that once, she spit in the drink of a man who called her a bitch.

Both tactfully avoided the fact that you were an Elemental, which you appreciated. You were starting to feel marginally better – maybe you wouldn’tbe fired, after all – when the door to the kitchen swung open and Pierre stormed through. Seeing his face, your heart sank.

“You!” Spittle flew from his lips as he pointed. “Y/N – pack your things! You’re done here. Fired. You think you can insult my friend, pull some magic bullshit on him, and continue to work here? Fuck that. Get out – now!”

A pin could have been heard in the silence. Coming to your senses, you did exactly as asked and got your things. Pierre hadn’t mentioned pressing charges, and you didn’t want to stick around long enough to find out.

Outside, you stood on the sidewalk and stared at the bus stop. Storm clouds brewed above, a visualization of your inner turmoil. Eventually, you turned and trudged down the subway.

Things had reached a point you couldn’t ignore anymore. You were beyond out of control. Emotions surged and strained against your internal walls, threatening everyone you held dear. The city didn’t deserve to be punished, even if no one within it knew of your sacrifice. Pierre’s friends were awful, but you could’ve just as easily lost your temper with someone you loved.

Someone like Jungkook, whom you couldn’t seem to be around without incident.

That was the reason most people feared Elementals. It was selfish of you to put your desires ahead of another person’s safety. The only way to protect someone you loved was to stay away.

Starting with Jungkook. You just wished he didn’t have to get hurt in order for that to happen.

Standing outside his building, you take a deep breath and press the buzzer. You wait for several long moments, wondering if he’s home and then –

“Hello?” Jungkook’s voice crackles over the speaker.

Leaning in, you press 316. “Hey. It’s me. Y/N.”

A weighted pause, and then –

“Come in.”

The door unlocks, and you push it inside. Climbing the steps to his place, your heart starts to pound. The last time you saw Jungkook, you were running away. The last text he sent was, ‘ok,’ in response to your message. If you were Jungkook, you wouldn’t be thrilled to see you.

Coming to a stop outside 316, you lift your hand and knock. A howl responds, followed by the patter of gigantic dog footsteps. Unable to stop your smile, you shake your head at the chaos.

“It’s just me, Bam!” you say, and he stops.

Bam’s howl is replaced with a whine and the sharp thwack-thwack of his tail on the door.

“Bam, out of the way,” Jungkook calls, his voice coming closer. A few seconds later, the door flies open to reveal your boyfriend.

You only catch a glimpse before Bam barrels out, nearly knocking you over. Legs and tail akimbo, he slobbers all over until you bend to pet him. Once satisfied, Bam turns around and trots back inside.

Silence falls between you, and you look up to see Jungkook. He’s dressed casually, sweatpants and a t-shirt bought at a concert you attended. He hasn’t moved aside, blocking you from entering.

Uncertain, you straighten. “Can I come in?”

Slowly, he nods and moves. You walk past him, trying not to focus on the heat of his shoulder. This might be the last time you see Jungkook, so you try to focus on that. Not the prospect of what you’re about to do.

Hearing the door shut, you take a deep breath and turn to face him. “I can’t stay too long,” you admit, digging your nails into the palms of your hands.

Jungkook regards you warily. His expression makes your chest ache, unused to him with such a stern expression. After last night, you suppose it’s earned. You should probably get used to it.

“Y/N.” His jaw works. “What’s going on?”

Deciding honesty is the best policy – up to a point – you force out your next words. “I think we should break up,” you say in a rush.

With a low whine, Bam slinks in the direction of the bedroom. Jungkook glances at him, distracted, before facing forward.

“What do you mean?” His head tilts. “Like, you want to take a break?”

Steeling yourself, you shake your head. “No. As in, I want to break up. Permanently.”

A train passes by the building, rumbling the floorboards underneath. Most people would avoid living in this building for that reason, but Jungkook was overjoyed by the prospect of discounted rent.

He doesn’t seem overjoyed now, though. Instead, he looks stricken.

“Walk me through this,” Jungkook says, walking closer. The set of his mouth has turned stubborn. “I don’t follow. Why are we breaking up again?”

The knot in your chest tightens. You should have known Jungkook wouldn’t make this easy on you. “We’re not good together,” you say, only to correct yourself. “I mean, I’m not good for you. I’m not in a place where I can be in a relationship.”

He comes to a stop. “I can wait, Y/N. I don’t mind.”

Reaching for you, Jungkook’s brows crease when you take a step backwards. His hand falls between you, and he stares at the empty space. The crack in your heart widens, made worse by his silence.

“I mind, though,” you force yourself to say. “I can’t ask you to wait for me, Jungkook. That’s not fair to either of us. It’s too much pressure.”

The words make your heart splinter, reaching a point you aren’t sure can be reassembled. Maybe the pieces will simply lodge in your muscle, bruising your insides each time you draw breath.

“I won’t pressure you,” Jungkook says, automatic. His frown deepens. “Tell me what this is really about, Y/N. Is this about sex? It’s fine if we don’t have it.” Stepping closer, he takes your hand and you let him. “I just want you to be honest with me.”

Somewhat manic, you shake your head – and then nod.

Sex is a part of the problem, but it’s not the root cause. Sex with Jungkook is unthinkable. You can barely remain in control when you kiss, let alone allow more. With your past partners, this wasn’t an issue, but your past partners weren’t Jungkook.

Never have you met someone able to scramble your thoughts with a kiss. Whose gaze melted inhibitions and tore down every wall. You have little doubt that with Jungkook, you’d lose full control, and the thought is terrifying. Already, your makeshift barriers are weakened.

Rain splatters against the window, and your stomach lurches.

“Seriously, Y/N,” Jungkook says, returning your attention to him. “What’s this about? I can tell something’s on your mind.”

He takes your other hand, and you realize how close he stands. “Is it work?” Jungkook asks, a crease between brows. “Is there… some reason you can’t quit? You can tell me, Y/N.”

An odd zing of disappointment goes through you. For a moment, you thought Jungkook had guessed your secret, and this could all be avoided. If Jungkook knew what you were and that you lied to him – well, he’d end things for you. Hesitant, you consider revealing that truth but can’t seem to form words. It would devastate you, seeing fear replace love in his eyes.

“Work isn’t the problem,” you say at last. “It’s us, Jungkook. Or – it’s me. I don’t want to be together anymore.”

Disbelief flashes across his expression, and you idly wonder what will happen if Jungkook refuses. Even as you think this though, his expression shifts. Jungkook takes a careful step backwards, dropping your hands entirely.

He’s never been good at hiding emotion. Jungkook is your opposite in that way, revealing every shift of thought and desire. You watch confusion become anger, then bitterness a moment before he turns away. The set of his shoulders is still, staring out the window as yet another train passes.

Restless, he turns to drag a hand through his hair. “I don’t believe you,” he declares. “This is so out of nowhere, Y/N. What aren’t you telling me?”

“I’m telling you everything,” you say, panic rising. “And this isn’t out of nowhere! I’ve been telling you for months I need to take things slow and this – well, this is the opposite of slow, Jungkook!”

Jungkook stares back at you, heated. “Yeah, I guess so.”

The two of you stand there for a moment, the tension thick in between you. Eventually, you look away first and pull your bag tighter.

“Right,” you exhale. “Well, I should go –”

Striding forward, Jungkook reaches you to cup your face with both palms. Gently, he lifts your face towards him, and all thoughts cease completely. Gaze searching, his breath fans across your parted lips.

Jungkook’s gaze intensifies. “I don’t believe you,” he murmurs.

Adrenaline zips under your skin, stirring your magic into a deadly storm. Entire body tense, you suppress the urge to fight or flee. So often, you’re the one running but right now, you feel more compelled to fight.

A knife in you twists, knowing you’re a coward. If you were stronger, you could keep Jungkook. No matter how understanding he is, the fact remains that if he stays with you, Jungkook remains in danger. Each passing day only worsens the pain.

His face blurs. With a start of surprise, you realize there are tears on your cheeks. The furrow between Jungkook’s brows deepens, noticing as well.

“You’re not listening,” you blurt. “I can’t see you any longer, Jungkook. It’s in your best interest, I promise – I can’t do this. It’s too much.”

Reaching up, you remove his hands from your face and head for the door.

Jungkook follows close behind. “Which is it, then?” he demands. “You want me to go slowly, or you feel too much?”

Pressure weighs every inch of your skin, demanding you answer. Anything that comes out now will only make things harder. Reaching the door, you feel Jungkook’s hand on your shoulder. Caving, you don’t fight when Jungkook turns you to face him.

He’s too close to you. Too much and too close, his one hand sliding to cup the back of your neck. Slowly, his thumb strokes the elongated line of your throat. You swallow, hard, and his gaze follows the motion.

Jungkook’s gaze flicks to yours. “You keep saying you’re no good for me,” he says, his voice low. “But what if I don’t care? Don’t I get a say in this decision?”

The force of holding in your magic worsens, becoming near impossible. Hastily built walls threaten to collapse, and reality blurs between one moment and the next.

“I’m sorry,” you blurt, your hand searching behind you. “I have to go.”

Finding the doorknob, you twist and stumble backwards. Jungkook watches you go, the look on his face physically painful as you turn around. Each second that follows is pure concentration, trying not to break before getting outside.

The ocean is only a few blocks from Jungkook’s apartment.

Reaching the harbor, rain pelts your face in a way that feels punishing. Magic makes your limbs tremble, escaping your body in wisps of fog and rain. The moment you arrive at the harbor, you shatter, collapsing forward to grip your knees with both hands.

Eyes pressed tightly shut, you hear the storm howl. Waves churn the harbor, sloshing over the sidewalk in an attempt to get closer. No tidal waves, you plead in an attempt at reason. No whirlpools, no water spouts.

Your magic listens in this regard, at least. By the time your eyes open, a curtain of rain mingles with tears on your cheeks. Staring out at the ocean, each inch of your body is numb.

Jungkook will never forgive you for this.

The thought banishes all the rest. You can’t say that you blame him. Slowly, you exhale as you lift your gaze. The chasm in your chest widens, becoming something unbreachable. This is all your fault. You wish there was some satisfaction in knowing this, but there isn’t.

Eventually, the rain dulls, and you push yourself upright. Your sneakers squish with every step, the silence all-encompassing as you ride on the subway. Entering the building, you remove your shoes and collapse on your bed, fully clothed. Thankfully, your roommate isn’t home, so you aren’t forced to explain the events of tonight. Seokjin would have wanted to discuss, and you aren’t sure you can without breaking down.

Burrowing your face into the pillows, you manage to cry yourself asleep. Rain doesn’t let up the entire night.

“Tell me again.” Taking a seat at the table, Seokjin spoons yogurt and berries into his mouth. “Why did you have to end things with your boyfriend?”

Cracking open one eye, you glare from where you sit, slumped forward. “You know why, Seokjin,” you grumble. “Not all of us can be air Elementals in perfect control of their magic.”

“You could be, though,” he says, pointing with his spoon. “If you put in like, five seconds of training and embraced your water powers instead of running away whenever things got bad.”

“I am not running.”

“No.” Seokjin lifts a brow. “You’re cowering, which is far less attractive.”

“I’m not cowering, either.” Scowling, you bury your head deeper into your arms. “I’m wallowing. Big difference.”

Scoffing, his spoon scrapes the bottom of the bowl. Pushing his chair back to stand, Seokjin heads for the sink and turns on the tap. The water itches a spot deep in your chest, almost taunting.

“I can’t be too hard on you, though,” Seokjin says as he cleans. “You did get fired and dumped in one day – that’s pretty rough.”

“Does it count as being dumped if I did the dumping?”

“I’ll allow it.” He opens the dishwasher. “But only because really, you didn’t want to break up with Jungkook. You’ve just convinced yourself the world is better off without you – something I highly disagree with, by the way, but can’t fault you for feeling. It’s too sad.”

“Thanks,” you mumble, and close your eyes.

Two days have gone by since your decision to end your relationship with Jungkook. It hasn’t been great, to put things mildly. On Monday, you barely left your room and rain poured from the sky. When you did enter the kitchen, the weather person on Channel 9 predicted local flooding.

Seokjin arrived from his business trip that night, took one look at your face and helped stop the storm. You sagged with relief, falling into a fitful round of sleep that only lasted three hours.

Seokjin is one of the few Elementals you know who embraces their power. Both his parents are air Elementals, and he was raised to take over their magical consulting business. Said business does well, leading Seokjin to own a gorgeous, three-bedroom apartment in the middle of the city. He got bored last winter, decided to post for a roommate and here you are. One of the few people in the city willing to room with an Elemental.

You don’t care what Seokjin does with his magic, although his laissez-faire attitude can occasionally be unnerving. You’ve lived your entire life with the assumption your existence is dangerous. All you need is a quick Google search to reinforce this fact. But then there’s Seokjin, living his life, seemingly none the worse for the wear.

He discovered your powers about a month into rooming together. Coming back from a trip, Seokjin opened the door to stare, slack-jawed, as plates washed themselves in the sink. Glancing up from your book at the table, you immediately sent two dishes crashing onto the floor.

Seokjin stared at this for a moment, then looked up. “You owe me new plates,” he declared and walked into his bedroom. After a moment, he popped his head out. “Hey – you think if we combined my wind and your water, we could create a waterspout but on land?”

“That’s… a tornado, Seokjin.”

“Right.” He slapped the doorframe once and disappeared. “Well, something to think about!”

Months later, Seokjin still doesn’t understand your avoidance of magic, but respects the decision enough to leave it alone. At least, until something like this happens and he’s again at a loss.

“Listen.”

Turning around, he shuts the dishwasher with his hip.

“Oh, no.” You grimace. “What now?”

Seokjin raises both hands. “Nothing, nothing. Far be it from me to comment on your mistakes. I’m sorry – did I say mistakes? I meant, ‘learned life experience.’ Through mistakes.”

“Was there a question in all that?”

“No question.” Loosely, he gestures. “Just wanted to say you can stay here, rent-free, until you figure this out. You know I’m only taking your money because you insist. I don’t need it. This place is already paid for.”

“Only because you frightened the seller so badly, they cut the price in half.”

“Listen.” Seokjin’s smile turns slightly sinister. “If they were willing to let their ingrained fear of Elementals influence their selling point, that’s on them. Not me.”

“Fair enough,” you sigh and sit back. “But seriously – thank you. This will give me some time to come up with a plan.”

Seokjin nods, tracing the rim of his coffee. Absently, he glances down the hall at the empty third bedroom. “You know…”

“No,” you say, automatic.

His right brow lifts. “You don’t even know what I was going to say.”

“You were going to suggest I use this time off to work on my art.”

“Okay.” Seokjin shrugs. “Maybe you did know. But seriously, Y/N – why not?”

Weary, you exhale. “Because every time I try to paint, I get this… block. I can’t explain it. Watercolors used to be the one place I felt comfortable using my magic. Now… I don’t know. I can’t seem to use my magic anywhere. Even my art.”

Seokjin tilts his head, thoughtful. “How long has this been going on?”

“Don’t know – a few months?”

“Not long after you started dating Jungkook.”

Staring at Seokjin, you realize he’s right. That’s exactly around when you began dating Jungkook. The block happened not long after. Thinking about the early days of dating are painful though, and so you choose not to.

“I don’t want to talk about him,” you declare with a shake of your head. “Right now, what I need is a job. And to earn money. Preferably in that order.”

Seokjin’s lips twitch. “Let me know if the order changes. I know a guy.”

Before you can consider his offer too seriously, your phone rings on the table. Glancing down, your heart constricts at your mom’s name. It isn’t that you don’t want to talk. It’s that if you do, Jungkook’s name will come up, and you’ll be forced to explain why you two aren’t together. Right now, you’re managing to cope by avoiding the topic. You aren’t sure what will happen if you’re forced to confront it.

Not to mention the very real possibility your mom will be happy. She liked Jungkook, but she always worries whenever someone new enters your life.

Also glancing at your phone, Seokjin scowls. “Don’t answer it,” he says, walking past. “Whenever you talk to your mom, things get even worse.”

Seokjin’s not wrong. Your mom means well – really, she does – but talking to her tends to leave you exhausted. Still, you know from experience it’s better to answer now.

“I know,” you sigh and stand up. “But if I don’t pick up now, she’ll just keep calling. Hey,” you say, pressing answer. “One second, mom.”

Ignoring Seokjin’s sad shake of his head, you scoop up your coffee and head for your bedroom.

Closing the door to your room, you lean backwards. “Hi, mom,” you say, lifting your phone to your ear. “Sorry about that. I was eating breakfast. How are you?”

“Oh, you know,” your mom says, and you can practically hear her smile. “Same old, same old. The better question is, how are you? I saw on the weather there’s some flooding by you. Hope you’re alright!”

Grimacing, you move the phone to speaker. You should have known your mom would check in. Reading between the lines of her question, you can hear what she’s really asking. Your mom wants to know if you caused the flooding – an answer which is undeniably yes, but she doesn’t have to know that.

Setting down your half-empty mug, you flop face-first on your bed. Less information tends to be more with your mom. You’re debating what to say when she solves the problem for you.

“I know you haven’t had a slip in years,” she continues. “But if there’s another water Elemental in town, you should try to steer clear of them! Being around them could set you off – that’s what happened to Becky’s nephew, she said.”

Fighting an eye roll, you roll on your back. Becky Mayweather is your mom’s best friend in the entire world and one of your least favorite people. She’s the type to bake cookies, offer a shoulder to cry on – and then promptly turn and gossip to the neighbors about it. She fancies herself an Elemental expert because a few of her friends married them. Funnily enough, neither you nor your mom have met these friends in person.

“Oh?” you ask. “I never noticed.”

“It’s true! You know that I worry, Y/N. All alone in the city with another Elemental for a roommate…”

Annoyance spikes in your stomach. “His name is Seokjin, and I’m an Elemental too, mom. His mom could say the same thing about me.”

Seokjin’s mom could be saying that, but she wouldn’t because Seokjin’s mom and dad are both magic enthusiasts. The few times you met them, they were nothing but kind.

“Oh, Y/N.” Your mom sighs. “It’s not the same.”

“Why not?”

“Watch your tone,” she says. “I’m only telling the truth. You work hard on controlling your magic. Your roommate, on the other hand, uses his magic willy-nilly. In broad daylight! You two couldn’t be more different.”

Your mom isn’t wrong about that, although not for the reason she thinks. Seokjin does use his magic freely, but you’re the one at risk of hurting others – not him.

“Seokjin is a good guy,” you say tightly. “He’s letting me stay here, rent-free, while I search for another job.”

“Another job?” Her voice pitches. “What happened to the job at that restaurant?”

Cursing yourself for your own stupidity, you close your eyes. “Um… I was let go. Difference of opinions with management.”

“Oh. Well. That’s too bad, Y/N, I’m sorry. It’s probably for the best – you don’t want to be working for someone you don’t respect, right?”

Some of your anger lessens at her genuine sympathy. It’d be easy to paint your mom as the villain but truthfully, she comes from a good place. You know that she loves you; she just doesn’t want to lose you the same way she lost your dad.

Exhaling deeply, you reach to grab a pillow. “I’ve been trying to paint,” you say. “It hasn’t been going well.”

“No?”

You frown at the obvious joy in her voice.

“Yeah,” you admit.

“Well…” Your mom draws the word out. “We always knew art was a risky hobby, Y/N. Painting. With watercolors. Something could easily go wrong and put you in danger.”

“I know, mom.”

“Actually,” she adds, her excitement growing. “Maybe this is a sign. Y/N – what if this means your powers are weakening?”

Your entire body goes still. “What?”

“Yes!” she says, oblivious to the panic in your voice. “You always loved watercolors because they made sense to you, right? Because of your… well, magic. What if a block means your powers are growing weaker? I wonder if other Elementals ever lose touch with their magic. I’ll have to ask Becky.”

Irrational anger surges within, and you hear the faucet in your bathroom turn on. Hastily, you work to turn it back off.

“You don’t need to do that,” you blurt. “I’ll research it myself. Actually, I should get going – I wanted to apply for some jobs this morning.”

“Oh, yes – good call, honey. You go and apply. Let me know if you need help. Becky has connections with the local university. I’m sure someone could help you update your resume – or even apply, if that sounds interesting to you.”

“Thanks,” you say, although it absolutely does not. “That’s a nice offer.”

“Have a good day, honey – I love you!”

“Love you, too,” you say before hanging up.

Dropping the phone onto your bed, you hug your pillow tightly. It takes several long minutes to relax, wading your way through an anxious sea of thought. Although your mom means well, conversations with her tend to leave you feeling drained. Since you were young, it’s felt like your mom has an idea of the perfect child, and they aren’t you.

Eventually, you stand to bring your mug to the kitchen. Seokjin is busy making another pot of coffee, the delicious scent wafting overhead.

Passing him by, you eye this warily. “Isn’t that your third pot this morning?”

“And?” Seokjin reaches for his mug. “You’ve had three cups yourself.”

“Touché,” you sigh, collapsing on the couch.

Minutes later, Seokjin enters the living room and hands you a mug.

Staring into the drink, you say, “Thanks.”

Settling onto the sofa, Seokjin examines you over the rim of his coffee. You ignore him, taking a long sip of your drink. A summer breeze wafts through the window, and with a flick of his wrist, Seokjin sends it back out.

A stab of envy goes through you, although you know it’s irrational. Seokjin always makes magic look easy, but you’ve never found it to be so. Maybe when you were younger, before the crippling fear and anxiety had a chance to set in. The only time magic ever felt normal was when you painted and now, you can’t even do that.

Thinking about painting makes you think about Jungkook though, causing the dull thud in your chest to become a sledgehammer. You miss him. Miss the easy way Jungkook made you laugh. How he insisted on constantly touching some part of your body.

Cupping your mug of coffee, you take another sip and sink into the sadness.

“Far be it from me to dole out advice.” Seokjin interrupts your tiny pity party. “But I think you’re going about this the wrong way.”

Too exhausted to argue, you merely exhale. “What’s the right way, then?”

His head tilts. “I don’t know. But I find it weird your block appeared around the same time you started dating Jungkook. You’ve…” Seokjin hesitates, and you recognize his how-do-I-put-this-delicately face. “You’ve given up a lot over the years, Y/N. Maybe this time, you gave up more of yourself than you realized.”

Silently, you wonder whether he’s right. For too long, you’ve gone through the motions of life without really living. Too scared of letting people in, scaring them off, of being yourself. Perhaps giving up Jungkook will be the final straw. The thought doesn’t comfort you, and you have no response.

After a moment, Seokjin turns on the TV. The morning slips by, though you can’t help but think about his earlier comments – could you control your magic if you tried harder? The moment you think this, you instantly banish the thought. You’ve been attempting for months, and nothing has worked.

With this cheery thought, you allow yourself to sink further into melancholy. Only this time, the water rushing overheard isn’t your friend. You aren’t sure it ever was.

Wednesday morning, you leave the apartment in a haze. You thought that by today, things would be better but if anything, the situation seems to be worse.

Missing Jungkook is painful.

It hurts more than you thought, which might sound stupid, but that doesn’t make it any less true. When you and Elliot broke up, it was sad, but you knew it was for the best and that lessened some of the pain. Now though, each beat of your heart prevents the wound from closing. A tentative scab in one second, only to be torn open the next.

Jungkook always sent you good morning texts. Not because he was up before you, but because he went to bed so late, it was only an hour or two before you awoke. His words were the first thing you read in the morning, smiling sleepily at his rambling. Sometimes, Jungkook would include a late-night snack recipe. Always, he’d end with something he liked about you.

His silence is deafening. Something not even your favorite coffee shop can fix, although you try. Standing in line, you aimlessly flip through songs on your phone. Today, you promised Seokjin you’d attend at least two interviews. The first one is in an hour at a sushi restaurant. Before then, you plan to load up on caffeine and organize your thoughts.

When the line moves forward, you flip to your messages. No new texts. Unsurprising, but it rends the scab in your heart anew.

Facing forward, you remove an earbud to order. “Hi,” you say, mustering a smile. “I’ll have an iced americano with rose syrup.”

“Got it.” The barista barely looks up. “That all?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Want a receipt?”

“Nope.”

“Cool.” She nods. “That’ll be ready soon at the end of the counter.”

Nodding your thanks, you replace the ear pod. Cranking your music louder, you wait for your coffee and lean against the counter. The coffee shop is tiny, empty for a weekday after the morning rush. Aimless, you glance over the clustered tables.

Your thoughts are on Jungkook before they can be stopped. You wonder what he's doing, what he’s wearing, whether he’s blocked your number yet from his phone.

A talented graphic designer, Jungkook works mostly on commission and on his own time. He does well for himself – enough to afford rent on his own place. Your mutual creative streak was something you had in common. Not your sleeping hours, that’s for sure.

Jungkook usually slept until nine or ten, then went to the gym before he made breakfast. You used to tease him about that, saying he couldn’t call it breakfast if –

Your heart falters. Jungkook must be on your mind since you seem to have hallucinated him here, at the coffee shop. You blink once, and then twice, but the mirage doesn’t fade, and you’re forced to conclude Jungkook is actually here.

Unfolding himself from a chair, he heads in your direction. Panicked, you glance at the counter, then back up. Your coffee hasn’t finished, which means that you’re trapped. Straightening, you do your best to seem natural and are certain you fail. Jungkook doesn’t just look natural, he is so as he approaches. At least, until you notice his hands in his pockets.

Jungkook does this when he’s nervous. Likely, he’s playing with the inside pocket lining. It hurts, knowing him so well, and not being his. When Jungkook comes to a stop, you stand mere inches apart.

“Jungkook,” you say, his name punched from your diaphragm.

He nods. “Hey.”

Uncertain, you glance down at the counter to check for your drink. Still nothing and, looking back, you tilt your head. “What are you doing here?”

Jungkook’s hands go deeper, if possible. “Getting coffee. Is that allowed?”

Your lips press together. “Sure. Theoretically, you can get coffee. What I’m asking though, is why you chose this coffee shop, five blocks away from your place. Usually, you’re not awake before noon.”

His expression is inscrutable. “Couldn’t sleep.”

“Ah.”

The silence between you lengthens, and not in a good way. You know why you’re quiet but can’t tell what Jungkook is thinking. You suppose that it’s possible he woke up early, forgot this was your favorite shop and went on a long walk for coffee – it’s possible, but unlikely.

At last, Jungkook exhales. “Alright, fine. I wanted to see you.”

“Y/N?”

Both of you turn at the sound of your name. Glancing between the two of you, the barista seems to pick up a weird vibe, dropping the cup to hurry away. Grateful for the interruption, you reach for your coffee and attempt to reset.

It’s not fair of Jungkook, corning you like this. You were already forced to end this once – unfair, making you do so again. Breaking up with him once was barely possible; twice is unthinkable.

“Don’t you have anything else to say?”

His voice interrupts your train of thought and, gripping your drink tightly, you turn.

“Like what?” you ask.

“Like, I don’t know.” His brow furrows, frustration obvious. “Anything, Y/N.”

Behind the counter, the barista fills a tea kettle to set this on the stove. You watch it instead of Jungkook, unsure how you’re going to do this again. The pressure of the water boiling is near tangible, mimicking the internal state of your mind.

Biting your tongue, you decide a safe exit is best. Jungkook will get the hint without you being forced to break his heart. Counting backwards from ten, you exhale and attempt to walk past.

“I’m sorry you came all this way,” you say in a murmur.

You’re nearly past Jungkook when you hear a soft swear. Only one more step happens before his hand grips your elbow.

“Y/N, please,” Jungkook breathes, turning you towards him.

Your gaze lifts and you start at his obvious pain. Staring back, Jungkook searches your face for something unspoken. Whatever he seeks, he must find it, since determination enters his.

You tear your gaze away. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Jungkook.”

“I want to know if you were serious about breaking up.”

He’s still holding your elbow.

You must notice this at the same time, but neither of you move. Your gaze returns to his, drawn like a magnet and you realize your mistake when you can’t look away. Romeo’s line about Julie being the sun comes to mind, making sudden sense. You orbit around Jungkook, whether you like it or not.

In the background, a tea kettle whistles. “I meant what I said, Jungkook,” you say, forcing yourself to speak first. “I’m not good for you.”

A muscle in his jaw feathers. “But why,” he demands, frustration seeping through. You can hear in his voice the long nights of desperation, of little sleep in your absence. “I don’t understand what went wrong, Y/N. What did I do?”

A chasm in your chest opens, hating how easily he jumps to self-doubt. Before you can think better of it, you move closer.

“Nothing,” you say, one hand on his arm. “You did nothing wrong, Jungkook. I’m just not in a place where I can be in a relationship.”

“But why not?” His gaze sharpens. “Everything was fine between us until Sunday.”

“Everything was not fine.”

Jungkook pauses, then barrels on. “When you say you can’t be in a relationship… what you’re really saying is you can’t be in a relationship with me.”

“With anyone,” you correct, although you aren’t sure that’s the truth.

Your magic has never been this temperamental. Possibly because this is the first time you’ve fallen in love. Dating someone not Jungkook would be safer, but the thought is abhorrent.

If you can’t have Jungkook, you don’t want anyone. That will be your punishment. Jungkook will move on, fall in love, and be happy with another person. Not you. No one else will compare, and if you can’t now, you doubt you’ll move past this crippling fear.

“You keep telling me that,” Jungkook says, growing heated. “But I’m the one you’re breaking up with, so it’s a little bit about me. You need to give me something, Y/N. Is this about your past? I know you don’t like to talk about your childhood, but I want to know.”

A loud buzzing fills your ears, gaze darting around. You haven’t told Jungkook much about your family, not wanting to invite questions about being an Elemental. The thought of him guessing sparks panic again, and the tea kettle on the stove whistles louder.

“People in my past hurt me,” you say in a rush. Magic itches beneath your skin, begging for escape. “That’s part of it, but not all.”

“What’s all, then?”

Frustration seeps past the wall, and several things happen. Your magic lashes out, a loud noise makes you jump, and the tea kettle shatters while hitting the floor. Water sloshes across the tile, steam hissing as the barista jumps back with a yelp.

Startled, you whirl around. One barista turns off the stove, another grabs a towel while a third finds a broom. Luckily, none of them seem injured – the tea kettle missed their skin. Taking a half-step towards them, you force yourself to stop. Although you want to help, that might make you seem guilty.

Already, the guilt within you is rising. You felt your magic overpowering you and chose to stay. If a barista had been hurt, it would’ve been your fault.

Turning back, you find Jungkook staring at the mess. He looks similarly shocked, twisting the knife in your gut. If he knew you caused this, he’d look at you that differently.

“You see?” you blurt, and he glances in your direction. “Everyone around me gets hurt. I can’t hurt you, too, Jungkook.”

Shoving open the door, you’re halfway outside when his words reach your ears.

“That’s the thing, Y/N,” he says softly. “You already have.”

The door shuts behind you, and you almost make it home before starting to cry. The skies open again above the city.

“This can’t be a coincidence,” you mutter, staring through the window.

The slightly dilapidated Ramen-rama tables stare back at you until the owner walks past. Catching you standing there, he motions you on.

Somewhat chagrined, you trudge down the sidewalk. Reaching a playground two blocks away, you collapse on a bench and attempt to be rational. Four different interviews. Spread across two different days. Each one ending the exact same.

One crappy interview, even two, and you’d understand. But four crappy interviews in the same way? Something weird is happening. Each interview, you arrived, greeted the owner, answered a few questions, and were thus informed the position was filled.

It wasn’t that you hadn’t gotten a job. It was that your interviewers seemed nervous, staring hard at your resume and never your face. They seemed relieved when you left, as though you were liable to break something for fun.

“Hey. Did you interview this morning at Ramen-rama?”

Startled, you turn and find a stranger beside you.

You don’t recognize him; certainly you’d remember if you met before. Dressed in a Ramen-rama t-shirt, his dark hair is gathered in a bun on his head. His hair makes your chest ache, since Jungkook used to wear his like that.

“Um, yeah,” you say, yanking yourself from your daydreams.

He smiles and nods. “I thought that was you. Listen – I overheard the manager talking this morning on the phone while I was unloading the truck. I think he was talking about you, so I thought I should tell you what I overheard.”

Concerned, you straighten. “Uh, okay. What was he saying?”

“He was talking to your old boss – Pierre? Apparently, he’s calling around and warning people not to hire you. Said that you stole from him, or something. Not sure if it’s the same story for everyone, or if he’s making up shit up in the moment.”

Your jaw nearly drops. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” The guy’s smile turns wry. “I’m assuming none of it’s true. You don’t look like the thieving type, but the boss is running a business, I guess. Can’t be too careful.”

“Right.” You pause, then shake your head. “I didn’t steal, just so you know. A guest was an ass to me, so I dumped water on him – on accident,” you add.

Laughing loudly, the guy clutches his bicycle. “Wow, I’d love to hear that story. Especially the part about it being an accident,” he adds with a wink, sticking out his hand. “I’m Wooyoung.”

“Y/N,” you say as you shake. “So. Pierre is calling people?”

Brow furrowed, Wooyoung pulls back. “Yeah. Sorry I had to tell you like this. Wasn’t sure whether you’d want to know, but figured I should.”

You push yourself to stand. “I do appreciate it. Thanks for telling me.”

“No problem.” Sheepish, he glances down the road. “I should actually get back if I don’t want to lose my job. Delivery,” he explains, nodding towards his bike. “Need the extra income.”

“Makes sense,” you say, forcing a smile. “Good luck.”

Wooyoung nods, then pauses in a way that feels familiar. He’s checking you out, you realize after a moment. Although flattering, it’s instantly followed by a rush of guilt. Wooyoung is cute and in another life, you’d say yes, but in every life, it’s hard not to want Jungkook.

Waving goodbye, Wooyoung climbs onto his bike and takes off. You head in the opposite direction, needing to put distance between you and Ramen-rama. If Pierre is shit-talking you across town, you’ll be hard-pressed to find another job at a restaurant. Owners are notoriously clicky and for how many restaurants there are, there are surprisingly few out of the loop.

Maybe you can ask the coffee shop if they’re hiring. Although you should probably avoid work with water for a bit. This drops your mood, your thoughts turning desperate. You’re so deep in an anxiety spiral, you nearly run into an open door on the sidewalk.

Jerking upright, you stare at faded, golden letters. Creative Courage is spelled in looping cursive over a frosted window. Art supplies fill a display case, while the other is clustered with art of all kinds. You spot sculpture, pottery, painting, and sketches before losing count.

Before you can chicken out, you push open the door.

Stepping in, tiny bells chime to announce your arrival. Soft, ambient light fills the space – a shop that’s two-fold, you realize now that you’re inside. The front sells art supplies while in the back stands a classroom. There’s a class in session now, several artists seated on stools before easels.

“Can I help you?” someone asks, stepping into your path.

Blinking, you focus. “Um, no – thank you! I was just looking.”

“Of course!” The woman beams, reaching up to arrange a clip in magenta hair. “That’s what we’re here for. If you do change your mind, let me know – we’ve got art supplies out front, and classes are held daily in back.”

“Classes?”

“Mhm.” Crossing her arms, the woman nods. “Mostly still life and figure drawing, but we’re hoping to add some more soon. Are you an artist?” she asks, sounding hopeful.

Immediately, you stiffen. “No. At least, not right now.”

Her lips twitch. “Not sure it works like that, unfortunately. Who you are can’t come on and off like a jacket. I like that, though,” she admits with a laugh. “Might borrow it the next time the muses aren’t singing.”

You can’t help but grin. “Exactly.”

Her head tilts, surveying you with unnerving intensity. “My name is Taryn. I co-own this place with my partner, Micah. They’re the one teaching right now.”

“Oh,” you say, somewhat wistful. “That’s nice.”

“Thanks.” Her smile widens. “So, what was your preferred medium? You know, ‘back when’ you were an artist.”

You can’t help but laugh when Taryn lifts her hands to use air quotes. Some people have a way of making you feel included in their jokes, and Taryn is one of them. She teases you in a conspiratorial way, letting you know she understands. People often call art a labor of love, which can be true but more often, it’s a complicated tangle of love, pain and frustration.

“Watercolors,” you admit. “And my name is Y/N.”

Her eyes brighten. “We’ve been meaning to add a watercolor class for ages. Some of our regulars have asked, but Micah and I are both hopeless. Potter,” she explains, gesturing at herself. “And Micah prefers charcoal. Sometimes sculpture.”

“Wow,” you say. “Those are very different.”

“You don’t say.” Taryn laughs. “Micah likes to keep things fresh. What about you? Have you ever taught be– hang on,” she blurts, her eyes going wide. “Did you say that your name is Y/N? As in Y/N Y/L/N?”

Your cheeks heat. “Yeah, that’s me.”

Whirling, Taryn hustles through the front room to duck behind a counter. Digging through several drawers, she pulls out a print to hurry back.

“Is this you?” she demands, thrusting this in your face.

Even cross-eyed and close, you recognize your most popular work. A watercolor series on the majesty and destruction of sea storms. Looking at this makes you feel raw, and so you look up.

“Yep,” you admit. “That’s me.”

Pulling back, Taryn looks at the print reverently. “You’re amazing. Micah was trying to do something similar but couldn’t capture the right feeling.”

Shuffling awkwardly, you shrug. You’ve never felt as though your work deserved acclaim, although it’s nice to know the series resonated with others. One of your favorite aspects of art is how it can be intensely personal but once shared, takes on a universal quality. You find it constantly surprising; how many people seem to share the same burdens.

“Seriously.” Taryn shakes her head wryly. “If you ever wanted to teach a class, let me know. We’d be lucky to have you here.”

“Thank you,” you say, stuffing both hands in your pockets.

You hadn’t realized your desperation was obvious. Or possibly Taryn is just incredibly good at reading others. Truthfully, it’s been a while since you stepped foot in the art world. Even before dating Jungkook, you felt your passion lagging. It’s been a long time since you wanted to connect with your inner voice, although merely the act of being here calls the tide in your blood.

Dangerous.

Recognizing this, you reinforce an inner wall. “I’m sorry,” you repeat. “I’m not really looking for something right now.”

Taryn nods. “Sure. If things change though, just let me know – before next week,” she adds. “We try to publish our class schedule on the first of each month.”

“Will do. Thanks, again.”

“Anytime!” Beaming, Taryn spins to restock the next shelf.

Realizing your conversation is finished, you continue down the next aisle. The shop’s materials are superb, and your fingers are itching to reach out and touch. Reaching the front, you notice a quote painted over the register: Creativity takes courage – Henry Matisse.

You stare at this for a while, unsure why it hurts. Courage isn’t something you’ve thought about in a long time. When you were younger, you pushed people away because it was safe, but now you find yourself wondering who was that for – others? Or yourself?

Maybe the reason you keep yourself separate is because you are afraid people might leave you. Like Katrina. Or Elliot. Or even your dad.

Suppressing magic was hard at the start. Everything about it felt counter-intuitive but you reasoned doing the right thing often took effort. This is what you told yourself, anyways. It made said effort more bearable.

When you first began painting, the relief you felt was immense. After so long spent ignoring your emotions, you found a space to be free. Your series about the sea was oddly therapeutic, working through complicated emotions; your love for the ocean, coupled with fear of its wild beauty. Similar clashes within yourself about magic. And always, always, the desire for more.

For a few hours though, those feelings could be a part of you. Magic could be a part of you, so long as you remained in control – and with brush in hand, you were.

Only now does it occur to you that maybe, this wasn’t healthy. Maybe you shouldn’t feel the need to compartmentalize, as though certain pieces of yourself can only exist in certain spaces.

Tearing your gaze from the words, you exit the shop and gently shut the door. Pulling your jacket tighter, you head down the sidewalk and let your thoughts drift. Jungkook only saw you paint once, but the memory is hard to forget.

You had just started dating, barely past the stage of calling him ‘boyfriend.’ The constant influx of emotion was difficult to manage, and after a few weeks, you were exhausted. Most of your time spent without Jungkook was seated before your canvas. After one particularly frustrating session, you set down your paint to stubbornly stare at the canvas.

A throat cleared from behind.

Startled, you spun and found Jungkook standing there. His gaze moved quickly to yours, but you realized he’d been staring at your half-finished work. Normally, you felt panic at the thought of someone seeing a work in progress. That night though, the look on Jungkook’s face eased your concerns. Awe; pure and clear.

Yanking down giant, over-ear headphones, you hastily stood.

Jungkook lurched forward. “No!” he blurted, only to halt. “I mean – you don’t have to cover the painting. I liked it.”

He seemed flustered, which made you slightly flustered, but you took a slow step sideways. Eager, Jungkook’s gaze traversed the canvas.

Eventually, he looked back. “Sorry about that,” Jungkook said and walked closer. Warm hands found your waist. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“How did you get in?” you laughed, burying your face in his chest.

“Seokjin.” He paused. “Did he not say I was here? I texted you a half hour ago, but you didn’t respond. I figured I’d stop by, and Seokjin said to come up.”

Softening, you made a mental note to chastise Seokjin later. Tightening your arms, you lifted your head and smiled.

“So.” Jungkook glanced over your shoulder. “This is you.”

This sent a thrill down your spine. He spoke as though he’d known you before, but only on a surface level and now, he understood. Jungkook knew your art was part of you, as much as your heart or your soul. You had often felt the same, but never said so out loud.

Magic swelled, and you pushed it back down, but it was difficult. When Jungkook bent his head, you forgot to be scared and let yourself feel. The brush of his lips. The tightening of his hands. The current within you, swelling against your highest walls.

Loudly, someone knocked on the door. Breathless, you jerked backwards and found Seokjin in the door.

“Hey.” He jerked a thumb over one shoulder. “Wanted to let you know our dishwasher broke. Flooded the kitchen.” Pointed, Seokjin looked at you. “Everything is all good, but I’m calling a plumber tomorrow. Carry on.”

In a flurry of embarrassment, you abruptly ended the evening and sent Jungkook home.

Remembering how the night ended, you stifle a groan and walk faster. Once more, you couldn’t control your magic and put Jungkook in danger. Hardly the creative courage Henry Matisse imagined.

You always assumed suppressing your magic was the best choice. But the best choice for who? Certainly not for you, who lives isolated, inert and in fear of yourself. Your dad used to call your magic a gift, but it’s been a long time since you felt that way.

This memory brings with it a sharp stab of pain. Since your dad passed, fear has replaced any joy your magic brought. Fear of falling victim to the same fate he did. Of others’ rejection. Of failing to live up to your father’s example.

You have little doubt that if your dad could see you now, he’d be confused by your actions.

You push others away in the name of saving them. Again, you think of Jungkook and for once you allow it. The entire way home, you wish that he’d call.

He doesn’t though and eventually, you stop hoping.

By Friday, the threads keeping your feelings at bay are nearly worn through. Intrusive thoughts push against fragile bonds, threatening the haven you’ve carefully crafted.

With more force than needed, you toss clothing into the washer. Your usual laundromat was closed, forcing you to walk five blocks to the next one. Sweaty from suddenly sweltering temperatures, your arms sore from the hamper, the situation does nothing to improve an already crappy mood.

Wiping your forehead with one arm, you slam the door and press start. The machine whirs to life, laundry tumbling in a way reminiscent of your inner turmoil. Up, you did the right thing by ending it with Jungkook. He’ll swiftly move on and find someone else. Down – but you don’t want him to find someone else. You want him to find you.

Teeth gritted, you turn and grab your hamper from the floor. Placing this on the washer, you wearily tug your cell phone from your pocket. By the time you walked home, you’d have to come back, leaving you with forty minutes to kill. You could read more of the book you just started. Or submit your resume to a couple of restaurants.

After yesterday’s disaster at Ramen-rama though, the interview process has stalled. Instead, you’ve found yourself thinking more about Creative Courage. For a brief moment, you even walked into the third bedroom to paint.

You immediately walked back out again, but merely the act was more than you’ve done in months. The thought of creation brought mostly panic, since it’d involve you being honest. Something you haven’t been with yourself in a while.

Because if you were honest, you know what you’d find. You would regret breaking up with Jungkook. Maybe even find that, deep down, you want to be selfish. You want to keep dating him, even if Jungkook gets hurt in the end.

After all, you saw what loving an Elemental did to your mom.

Putting down your phone, you scan the laundromat and find your gaze catching on the person in the next aisle.

No. No, no, no – absolutely not.

The universe – or whoever’s writing your story – must be cruel and unusual, since standing beside you is Jungkook. You’d recognize his head anywhere. Straightening from his hamper, Jungkook turns to face you and goes still.

Eyes wide, he seems stunned until someone slams shut their dryer. Both of you jump, breaking eye contact and time seems to reset. Pressing start on his machine, Jungkook grabs his gym bag and hoists it over one shoulder. He strides towards the exit, halfway there when you spring into action.

Dashing towards him, you cut him off at the dryers. Footsteps slowing, Jungkook meets your gaze with visible confusion.

“Sorry,” he says, tugging his gym bag behind him. The thick, grey strap of it cuts across his hoodie. “I was just leaving. I can come back later if you want to finish your load.”

Again, he tries to move past you, but something inside of you snaps. You aren’t sure what possesses you, but somehow, find your hand gripping his sleeve.

Startled, Jungkook stares.

Equally swift, you withdraw. “I, uh…”

Head spinning, all your words seem to fly out the window. Nothing about this was planned. You have no idea what to tell Jungkook besides I’m sorry, and even this would be woefully inadequate without explanation. Which you can’t give.

“You don’t have to leave on my account,” you say at last.

A singular brow lifts. “No? You didn’t seem to think that way on Wednesday.”

You suppress a wince, although you try your best to hide it. “I know,” you admit. “It’s just… this is your usual laundromat. I don’t want you to leave because of me. I wouldn’t even be here, expect the one near me is broken and –”

“Got it,” he interrupts, the words tight. “You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t have to be.”

Swallowing hard, you stare down at your shoes. You know you deserve this, but it’s just so hard to see Jungkook hurting. He deserves to be happy, not wasting his energy on hating you.

“Okay,” you whisper.

Your eyes start to burn, and you squeeze them shut to prevent a reaction. You absolutely cannot cry in front of Jungkook. Not when you’re the one who started this; the very last thing you want him to feel for you is pity.

“Hey.” Something in his tone shifts, and you hear Jungkook step closer. When you open your eyes, he watches you intently. “What’s wrong?”

A tiny fissure within your chest splinters.

Anyone else could have asked those words, and you would have been able to answer. For Jungkook to do so is unthinkable. You’re the one who ruined this. The one who hurt him, who ended this and still, Jungkook is concerned about your well-being.

“I was fired on Sunday,” you say in a rush. “Before I came to see you.”

He blinks only once before his face hardens. “Before you broke up with me, you mean.”

“Yeah,” you whisper.

Running his tongue over the back of his teeth, Jungkook glances away. His expression is taut, and you feel a sharp pang of envy. It’s so easy to read Jungkook. You’ve spent so long hiding your emotions, it strikes you as luxurious how easily he feels.

A muscle in his jaw tics. “Y/N,” Jungkook says, turning back. “What are you doing?”

“What… do you mean?”

Fear spikes your heart, wondering if Jungkook has finally pieced the facts together. Maybe he saw more than you realized at the coffee shop. Maybe he finally knows what you are.

“Why are you… torturing me?” he clarifies, a slight rasp to his voice. “I don’t know what you want me to say. You were fired? That sucks, but it doesn’t make this okay. It doesn’t make us okay,” he adds, gesturing to the air between you.

“I – I know,” you stammer, nearly blurting out something you’ll regret.

Like that you’re an Elemental teetering close to the edge. One who can feel every pipe, every spin cycle within the walls of this laundromat. All of them churning, pulsing, begging for your magic to release the water inside.

“You know?” Jungkook stares at you, incredulous. “Again, Y/N – what do you want from me?”

Since you started talking, you’ve moved several steps closer. Another breath, another reach and you’d be in his arms. Glancing down, you notice how quickly Jungkook’s chest rises and falls.

He’s afraid, you realize. Jungkook’s fear isn’t the same one as yours, though. He isn’t afraid that you’ll see him, but rather that you’ll destroy him.

Realizing this, a barrier within you crumbles. “It doesn’t matter what I want,” you say, somewhat desperate.

“You keep saying that.” Determined, he steps closer and somehow, your hand entwines with his to press against his chest. “You keep saying you don’t want this, but you won’t tell me why. Won’t tell me anything, Y/N – you were fired, and this is the first time I’m hearing it.”

“I couldn’t tell you!” you blurt. “I can’t explain it, Jungkook, but I couldn’t tell you when it happened.”

His gaze sharpens. “Then, yeah, maybe you’re right. Maybe we are better off broken up.”

Releasing you, Jungkook brushes past you and heads for the exit. You stare blankly at the wall before you, your whole world caving in as your head starts to spin. Magic seeps beyond your fractured walls, flooding your veins in desperate search for an exit.

“That’s not true,” you protest, spinning around. “I’ve told you more than anyone else in my life, Jungkook. I’ve let you in in ways no one else has.”

Jungkook stiffens at the door, his entire body taut. For a single, long moment, it seems as though he might reconsider but the longer you stand there, the more you watch the fight drain from the lines of his shoulders.

“I don’t doubt that’s true,” he says, hand hovering above the doorknob. “But that’s not the same as letting me in.”

He starts to go.

Everything around you becomes white noise.

When you were ten, you passed a famous dam on one of your cross-country moves. Your mom took you to see it, swinging your hand while entering the viewing platform.

The moment you saw it, you went wholly still. Trillions of gallons of water, trapped behind concrete, constantly pushing but unable to break. It felt like your magic. Raw, untamed power contained by a solid wall. You stared for longer than any other visitor, until your mom pulled your arm and said you should leave.

The entire way to the car, your mom was silent and once you were buckled in, she twisted around to see you. “Listen to me, Y/N,” she said, her voice serious. “That dam will only work if the wall holds. If the wall breaks, do you know what happens?”

Silent, you shook your head.

“The water will flood the whole valley. Everyone in its path, all the forest – they’d be gone. The wall can’t break, or bad things happen. Do you understand me?”

Solemn, you nodded because even then, you understood. Although your magical dam was intangible, it held equal importance. You had to hold in the magic, otherwise bad things would happen. So long as the wall was in place, you were safe.

Now though, you squeeze your eyes tightly as the wall starts to crumble.

Emotions break with the force of a tidal wave, racing ahead and drowning all in its path. Memories you thought were long buried continue to rise, crushing you further. Your walls are destroyed in a matter of seconds.

You remember your dad, kissing you on the head before leaving the house. Katrina’s stricken expression when the door shut in her face. Jungkook, asking you what he’d done wrong again.

Each memory drags you under, and you shudder against the onslaught. It takes everything you have to remain standing while your restraint dissolves.

Hands grip your arms.

Surprised, your eyes fly open to find Jungkook before you. His neck muscles strain, yelling to be heard over thundering water. You try your best to focus, to rein your magic back in – only to realize with horror, it might be too late.

The laundromat around you is in chaos. Several ceiling pipes have burst, water crashing down in torrents of water. Already, waves lap at your ankles. Noise filters back in, flickering before solidifying to something substantial.

People are screaming, abandoning their hampers in an attempt to get out. The door has stuck though, unable to open under the onslaught of water. Jungkook yells again, and this time you hear him.

“Are you okay?” he bellows, close to your face.

You stare upward, stupefied. Another pipe bursts, and you think that was you, but it’s hard to be sure. Hard to understand which parts are in control and which parts are not. What particular emotion is holding the reins at any moment.

Determination replaces fear in his face, and Jungkook bends before you have time to blink. In an instant, you’re tossed over his shoulder. A yelp escapes, upside-down but he’s already wading through the aisle of washers.

Jungkook shouts at people to move, but no one is listening. After a moment, you feel him exhale and surge forward. Although you can’t see, the people seem to be moving, so Jungkook must appear confident.

Grasping the door, he pulls on it, hard. Nothing happens. Exhaling, Jungkook grips your waist tighter and mutters, “Hold on.”

You don’t have time to ask why, since he yanks harder and the entire frame shudders. Jungkook does this again and another pipe bursts, drawing your gaze. By the time you look back, the door has budged an inch and water is pouring out. With a final wrench, Jungkook yanks open the door.

People shove past him, rushing into the street with the tide of water. Spinning around, Jungkook shields you with his frame from the wet crush of bodies. His grip never wavers, feet anchored to the ground as though they’ve rocks themselves.

With each breath, your pulse slows until finally, you locate the faint threads of magic. Before, you felt too much at once. The crush was overwhelming but now, you manage to breach the surface. For the first time, you see your panic influencing the tide.

Realizing this, you reach inward and try to – turn. With great effort, you identify the source of your power and disconnect. Water in the ceiling slows to a trickle, and then, nothing.

Exhaling against your neck, Jungkook’s hand moves lower.

You can’t help but shiver. “Jungkook?” you murmur into his shoulder.

“Yeah?”

“Could you… you know, set me down?”

“Oh.”

Somewhat sheepish, Jungkook lowers you to face him. He doesn’t step away, and neither do you. If this is the last time you see him, you want to be selfish and make it as long as possible.

He stares back at you, waterdrops caught between his lashes. In the background, water continues to drip from a pipe. The soft plink-plink echoes the thud of your heart.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

Jungkook’s hands remain on your waist, his touch scrambling all semblance of sanity. You aren’t sure how to answer without being honest.

Truthfully, you’re not okay.

An okay person wouldn’t break up with their boyfriend and then, six days later throw themselves in their path. An okay person wouldn’t be hiding their magic, they wouldn’t be lying to the person they love and most of all, wouldn’t continue to place that same person in danger.

Silent, you survey the aftermath of your outburst. Deep down, your magic itches in response to your panic. Seeping outward, it seeks to mold to the fear, but you manage to stop it. Something about the wall being gone makes your power less alien. No longer an unknown variable, but a constant.

“No,” you exhale. Steeling yourself, you take a step backwards. “No, Jungkook, I’m not okay. I… this is exactly why you should stay away from me. Bad things happen, and I can’t control them. I’m so sorry.”

Again, you brace yourself for his anger, but it never comes. Jungkook is unusually quiet, head cocked to one side. He sees right through you, a sensation unnerving enough that you drop your gaze.

“I should go,” you repeat, stepping around him. Reaching your washer, you hastily unload your soggy clothing. “I have to go.”

Jungkook says nothing, although you feel his gaze on the back of your head. Hefting your hamper, you slam the door shut, and turn. The water level at your ankles has dropped, no more than a centimeter remaining in the room.

Sirens wail in the distance, likely on their way to investigate. Your stomach lurches, recognizing the cost of your magic. As soon as possible, you should reach out to Seokjin. His company might be able to cover the damage if the laundromat can’t.

Nearing the exit, you look anywhere but at Jungkook’s face. “I’m sorry,” you repeat, unsure what else to say. “Really, I am.”

Again, he lets you move past. Water rushes out when you open the door, seeking the street, then the gutter. Hurrying past, you can’t shake the feeling something has changed.

Not only with you and Jungkook, but with you and your magic. Silent, you prod the place deep within from which your magic stems. You’re used to a wall, feeling closed off but now, it seems your mom was right.

Once shattered, the dam can’t be rebuilt.

A weightlessness accompanies this that you didn’t anticipate. Despite the terror of your outburst, there was a moment near the end when you stopped it. When you felt what was wrong and controlled your outburst of magic. You haven’t done that before.

The thought is followed by regret, remembering Jungkook. When you broke up, it was supposed to save him. Instead, you’ve only put him – and yourself – in greater danger. Maybe because you’ve continued to see him. Everything would be fine if you moved or kept your distance.

But then, another part of you wonders if you were wrong from the start. Maybe instead of providing distance, you should have come closer. Should have allowed Jungkook to decide whether he wanted to stay. After all, today, he experienced the worst of your powers, and he didn’t run. If anything, he moved closer.

Suddenly exhausted, you hail a cab. The driver grumbles at your wet clothes but allows you inside, and you tip him extra upon reaching your place. What you should do is find another laundromat and finish your load, but there’s an itch in your fingers you haven’t felt in some time.

Dropping your hamper at the door, you shutter yourself within the third bedroom. Not allowing yourself to second-guess, you sit down at your easel and pick up a brush.

For the first time in a long time, you allow the magic to flow. You paint.

Author’s Note: thank you for reading so far! Continued in Part II, here.

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