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#but this will stop at a certain point
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dear everyone ! its finally done - i am halfwhat finished with moving blogs . though there are still some tweaks in my carrd i have to do , i am confident enough to archive this place thats been amelias home for the past seven years ( what a wild idea ) . i will not follow people first , as i want to leave the choice to you , if you want to keep in touch with me , keep our plots or maybe even start new new ones . this is an all fresh start for me i desperately need to get back in the swing of writing and there will be no hard feelings towards those who decide not to continue our interactions . i am forever grateful for this experience , for every single one of you and those who want to continue what we had . my url remains the same , so it should be easy to find your way there ! ! i will have a queue running on this blog to make sure no one who is interested missed the moving thing , but other than that : THATS IT . see you on the other side ! ! take care and much love .
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inkskinned · 1 year
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the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.
three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.
two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.
their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.
one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.
i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.
i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.
and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?
you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.
a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.
someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.
#writeblr#warm up#this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru#but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist#ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work#part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r#ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week#this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism#imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY#''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''
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buckleydiazmp4 · 1 year
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no but the thing is. they KISSED. on screen. it was a real scene, not deleted, not removed from a script, it HAPPENED in front of the world's eyes. and AND the actors are normal about it and the whole cast and crew is normal about it and it's not vague and it's IMPORTANT. no matter the rest of it and what came after it, it happened!!
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julijbee · 7 months
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girlbossing too close to the sun.
#art#ive literally just been treating this game as a library simuator#i walk from bookseller to bookseller opening up all of their books#vivecs sermons are either a highlight or the point at which i stop reading#ive been trying to convince the ordinators that imitation is the highest form of flattery but it hasnt been working#let me wear your helmets please theyre so funny..#posting morrowind in 2024 isnt a cry for help but youre not wrong to be concerned.#morrowind#almalexia#vivec#im going to explain the chitin armor give me a moment#so the bonewalker nerevar on the shrines is adorable and it was only after drawing it however many times that i realized#it looked relatively close to a modified chitin armor#and so i modified chitin armor a few times and this was probably the cutest result#i also know i drew almalexia relatively pristine and untouched by years and vivec not so much but my thought process was#vivecs role as if not a favorite then the most accessible divine or the most “hands on” in a manner of speaking#acting in ways visible to the general population or actions explicitly brought to their attention#like not that almalexia isnt doing anything she is#but the dissemination of information regarding that is very different etc etc etc#anyways to a certain extent a god is the face on a shrine or in art or upon a statue or carving#but vivecs presence is interwoven with the geography of vvardenfell especially and his actions and writings with pubished materials#and the arts and culture and customs etc etc etc#so to me the face of a god you know and feel a commonality with or a god that walks alongside you is a face you would recognize#and vivec is already otherworldly looking enough#the simple mark of the years on his skin in some way grounding him in reality felt more right#that and i think the ways in which he and almalexia care about outward appearance are slightly different- they prioritize different things#and the ways they present outward power and their embodiment of their respective attributes share some similarities as they both have that#important preoccupation with physical power and physical strength to a certain degree#oh my god nobody read this i am yapping so bad.#tes
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novantinuum · 30 days
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somewhere up above the stars the wreckage of a Universe floats past
an AU ancient lonely god Steven I have. his moniker is Astra and I am obsessed with him right now.
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blueskittlesart · 2 months
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jesus CHRIST
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 11 months
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"If PD-MDZS drew He Xuan, would he be a Man or a Fish?"
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natjennie · 9 months
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i think mostly we as a culture need to stop pretending media is for us and instead recognize that it's for the people making it. "the show didn't do the thing I wanted it to" is so not the point. did it do what the people making it wanted it to do? did it tell the story they were trying to tell? than it was successful. if that doesn't align with what you wanted to happen, don't get up in arms about it. don't badmouth the creators and throw a tantrum. that's what fan works are for. the text is the text, and it told the story it was telling. you wouldn't be like "ugh shakespeare is insane for act v btw like there was no reason for juliet to kill herself she should've just waited and then her and romeo could have been together wtf this ruined the whole play" like no!!! the themes were there the set-up was there the foreshadowing was there shakespeare did what he intended to. just because it wasn't a happy ending and just because you thought it should've went differently doesn't mean it was bad. read a fic where juliet lives and move on.
#this is about ghosts but honestly fandom in general#stop pretending the creators of things owe you certain story lines. they're making it not you#i explained it like this to my sister:#imagine you're reading a book and there are sort of hints and scenes that you take to interpret a character as gay#you cite quotes and talk about the themes and the impact of your interpretation#and then at the end of the book the character comes out as asexual.#and then a lot of those scenes and quotes that you were using as evidence for your interpretation-#now they could be construed to have been pointing towards them being ace all along#just because it wasnt the end you fabricated in your head based on your understanding of the hints#doesn't mean it wasnt always the writers plan from the beginning.#AND it doesnt mean you can't keep imagining a world where they're gay instead#it just means that the writer was leaving those clues to point you towards the ending#and you interpreted the clues differently#bbc ghosts#ghosts spoilers#bc like. if last resort was the ending#you could 'read' the whole series with the understanding that they weren't going to leave the house#and the foreshadowing would add up#but now with the special. you can go back and 'read' the series with the understanding that they leave#and it still all adds up. the foreshadowing was there it just meant something different than you thought.#stories have beginnings middles and ends#you predetermined the ending while still in the middle and got mad when you weren't right.#does that make sense?
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qiu-yan · 2 months
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secretly afab jiang cheng poll
(someone once wrote a post about a similar scenario but i cannot find it. if someone finds it please send me the link)
consider the following scenario:
yu ziyuan gives birth to two biologically female children. her second birth in particular is difficult and renders it impossible for her to have any more children. determined to have one of her children inherit, however, yu ziyuan lies, and announces to the cultivation world the birth of a son, jiang cheng.
jiang cheng is raised as a boy. only yu ziyuan and a handful of trusted maids know the truth. jiang fengmian never finds out. jiang yanli never finds out. even wei wuxian somehow never finds out.
as time goes on, various other parties discover the truth at different points in jiang cheng's life--wen chao and his men after jiang cheng is captured in wei wuxian's place, wen qing and wen ning during the golden core transfer, possibly jin guangyao as well--but, due to various circumstances, everyone who knows dies before they can spread the information. eventually, the only person left alive who knows the truth is jiang cheng himself.
jiang cheng leads his sect. jiang cheng purposefully gets himself blacklisted by all matchmakers. jiang cheng raises jin ling. somehow, for the entirety of the 13 year timeskip and beyond, jiang cheng is able to hide the truth of his body from the entire world. wei wuxian returns after 13 years of death, the present half of the plot plays out exactly as it does in canon, and somehow this specific information just never comes up. even after wen ning's return, wen ning somehow never brings it up either, because he assumes wei wuxian knows already.
then, some time after the end of canon, wei wuxian finds out the truth: that jiang cheng, who he fully believed to be biologically male, was in fact biologically female this entire time, and also that jiang cheng managed to hide this information from him all the way up until now. maybe wen ning finally spills the beans or something.
how does wei wuxian react?
things to consider:
how does jiang cheng think of himself in this scenario? as a woman pretending to be a man? as the ancient fantasy chinese version of a transgender man?
how does jiang cheng wish to live in this scenario? does he wish to live as a woman? does he wish he were biologically male?
have jiang cheng and wei wuxian reconciled?
how would wei wuxian react to learning that there was a huge chunk of jiang cheng's life he had zero idea about?
what kinds of attitudes towards women has wei wuxian exhibited in the text?
what kinds of attitudes towards women has mxtx exhibited in the text?
explain your reasoning in the notes!!!
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theplatypusblue · 1 year
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jay has this little catchphrase(?) he says sometimes in the earlier seasons that he doesn't really say anymore, so when i heard it while rewatching s3 i suddenly got inspired to draw him for some reason
also textless:
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theetwinkleboy · 3 months
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and another member of the lov gets what they thought they wanted but at what cost. spinners has been the most interesting to me so far because it parallels so neatly with izuku’s. both of them feeling powerless and accepting a quirk because that’s what they thought they would need to be powerful and change things. both of them sitting across the table from each other, scarred and broken by the quirks that they accepted. spinner realizing too late that it wasn’t a quirk he needed to save his friend—it was just him. and maybe not accepting those quirks in the first place would have put him in a better position to save shigaraki (but all for one didn’t want him to save shigaraki, so). shigaraki’s murderer and his best friend. hm.
but also, to have it come back now, to have spinner say this now TO izuku, in the same chapter that izuku is like ‘how can we stop this from happening again (how can we stop the next person lashing out before they get past the point of no return)’ and tsukauchi is like ‘we can’t without more heroes’ like NO! that’s not the answer! spinner told him the answer. it’s not in a quirk or in more heroes. it’s being willing to reach out and see someone for who they are.
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mylittleredgirl · 3 months
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at least once a week during this b5 spiral i’ll have a realization of something that kicks me in the chest and i start a tumblr post like “do you every think about—” and then i stick it in drafts thinking no, i should write it as a fanfic so i can really share my pain with the group. and then i don’t write that, and think well, at least a better tumblr post, and then i don’t write that either and just stare into the abyss for two to thirty-six hours
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jadequarze · 8 months
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Timelapse of some of the commission busts
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batsplat · 4 months
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It's a thing I already knew but all your beautiful analysis really made obvious (to me) how much of a grudge holder vale is. That man is never letting it go he's gonna hold his grudges into his grave
you know, I do think this is an interesting issue, because I'm not sure this is true of all his grudges. just sticking here with the grudges he accumulated in his capacity as a competitor, rather than just his general approach to life or whatever... how you judge this will kinda depend on how you feel about the 'reconciliation' he's experienced with some of his rivals - and whether you read the whole thing as sincere or not. now, personally I reckon he still dislikes biaggi, but also you are allowed to just dislike people so I'll give him a pass for that. some of the others, I'm a little more convinced by the whole reconciliation schtick
let's get valentino's take:
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interesting that he mentions those three together, isn't it? and like, he's still not messaging biaggi or inviting him to his home - "even with max" kind of tells you all you need to know - but the other two? they said some proper nasty things to each other over the years!! I mean, the casey rivalry, there's some remarks from both sides where quite frankly I think I would struggle just a touch to get over it
I don't know, obviously this could all be pr stuff, but I kind of feel like... y'know, why bother? it's 2022, you're retired, who gives a fuck? sure it's a good look to be all magnanimous, sure it can be a bit of a way of twisting in the knife to the guys left in the cold, but also, who would care if you don't play nice? I think especially with jorge, you surely don't need to do all that, inviting him to your home and dancing with him... (which, again, some of the spats those two had...) and with the casey rivalry, if there's one guy who's still hung up about what happened between the pair of them, it's obviously casey (speaking of blokes who can hold a grudge). maybe this is giving valentino too much credit, but personally I buy it's more or less sincere. there's nothing to really indicate he's still particularly bothered by any of their past disagreements - he's basically going for the 'all's fair in love and motorcycle racing' approach. he knows he was an asshole, he accepts they were assholes too, whatever, that's how these things work. he's generally a fan of drama in rivalries, unsurprisingly, and he was happy enough to contribute his fair share - but he does see it as fundamentally being part of the game
to point out the obvious, check out who he's left out: sete and marc. that's where he can't let go of the grudges... because it's not about the offence itself as much as it is about the betrayal. this is the thing with valentino, right, it's about what kind of bond you had with him. if you weren't his friend in the first place and then piss him off as a rival then, y'know, whatever. obviously he's going to be vicious in trying to get back at you, but also he's really not going to waste his time feeling too aggrieved by it. I mean, think about how all the bullshit between him and casey dropped off sharply post-2012... from valentino's end anyway. think about how jorge and valentino pretty quickly got on again whenever they weren't fighting for supremacy within yamaha. they weren't friends in the first place, then they were enemies for competitive reasons for a while there, then it's over and valentino is basically happy enough to call it bygones
but... if it's a certain kind of bond you had with him and then you wrong him... that little mental list of all his past grievances, all your past transgressions, that's where it comes in. that's where he ices you out. denies you any emotional warmth. ensures that any interaction going forward is conducted entirely on his terms. where even any public 'reconciliation' won't truly be sincere.... or, certainly he's not going to forget what happened. if something else happens... it's like you've always got the potential of triggering this lingering resentment, in a way, where all that past stuff is still primed and ready to be called upon. he certainly doesn't just let it go
or, as he puts it in his autobiography:
Biaggi and I never talk to each other. I mean, we've never had a real conversation, anything that's lasted more than the requisite time to insult each other or put each other down, in the nastiest way possible. In any case, I don't hate him. It's true, we've never been friends, but hatred is something different, and that's too serious a word to describe our relationship. Far too serious. No, we have a reciprocal antipathy. No doubt this is a result of what we do for a living and the fact that we both want to win every single time. And perhaps it's also a function of the fact that we have very different personalities and very different ways of seeing things. Still, I don't think this means we hate each other, as some journalists have written. I think I could feel hatred for someone, but only for someone far worse than anything Biaggi has done. For example, if I were betrayed by a friend, then, yes, I could hate him. But Biaggi will never betray my friendship for the simple reason that we are not, and never have been, friends. Our relationship is very clear: we compete on the track - outside the track, each goes his own way. You could say we detest each other cordially.
... I mean. he said it, not me. and given this book was first published in '05... biaggi can't betray his friendship because they were never friends... I'm not saying he's thinking about sete, but it has to at least be a possibility, right? he's talking about one rivalry here and refusing to even mention the other... and the one he's refusing to mention is the one where he was friends with the other bloke. I don't know, maybe that's reading too much into it! and anyway, even if this passage wasn't really about sete, it's obviously still revealing. "detest each other cordially" is essentially what he was doing with casey and jorge (or from his point of view in any case, not entirely sure they'd agree with that). the grudge comes when he feels let down by you... and then, yes, he'll never let it go
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of course, he's willing to set aside his grievances for a while if there's sufficient motivation for him to do so. in 2009, when he had so definitively won that rivalry with sete, why bother kicking up a fuss? in 2016, quite frankly it was just too much, and it was getting to the point where it was obviously hurting him too. on the one hand there was the media furore that had been going on non-stop since sepang, on the other hand it was also hurting his own approach to racing. there's reports from the time how visibly aggrieved he still was in the first few races of the season, and it took until they got back to europe for him to... y'know, have fun again. it's not sustainable to be walking around with a constant dark cloud over your head and broadcasting burning resentment towards your two main rivals. certainly not for someone like valentino - he needs to be having fun! the slight rapprochement needed to happen, in a way, because otherwise those years would have been even worse for everyone involved. but that doesn't actually translate to forgetting any of those grudges. this is about convenience more than anything else
goes to show, really... most of the time he doesn't take these things personally. I talked about it a bit in this post, how maybe it's also something that changed over time for him: the question of whether he was willing to develop these kinds of bonds in the first place with competitors... because he does possess a certain level of self-awareness in terms of what these kinds of rivalries are like and what they do to interpersonal relationships. ideally, you don't want to be hurt by a friend like that, right? better not to have that kind of emotional attachment with your competitors in the first place. how unfortunate it'd be if all those years after sete the circumstances aligned for him to see a competitor as something like a friend again... because, after all, those are the only people who could betray him. those are the only people where he thinks he could truly hate them
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qtubbo · 7 months
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Im genuinely done with hearing this Tubbo has a nsfw boundary that is it, he does not have a character shipping boundary the most he has ever said on the matter is that they’re characters right(and then going I guess whatever Tommy says?)? QTubbo shipping is not breaking any boundaries, you are just enforcing stuff for him because you see him as an incapable child who can’t talk for himself.
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pjharvey-moved · 2 months
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at some point U realize trying to counter scientific and political and historical misinformation on tumblr is a pointless endeavor and i just see stuff that’s blatantly false and disprovable and go well people r allowed to be stupid online. freedom of speech. and then i go and like drink some tea and look at the clouds
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